This is a modern-English version of The Claverings, originally written by Trollope, Anthony. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

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E-text prepared by Mike Mariano
from page images generously made available by the
Making of America Collection of the Cornell University Library
(http://cdl.library.cornell.edu/moa/)
and revised by Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.,
using illustrations generously made available by
Internet Archive
(https://archive.org)

E-text prepared by Mike Mariano
from page images generously provided by the
Making of America Collection at Cornell University Library
(http://cdl.library.cornell.edu/moa/)
and updated by Joseph E. Loewenstein, M.D.,
using illustrations generously provided by
Internet Archive
(https://archive.org)

 

 


 

 

 

THE CLAVERINGS

 

by

ANTHONY TROLLOPE

 

 

 


 

CONTENTS

 

I.   JULIA BRABAZON.
II.   HARRY CLAVERING CHOOSES HIS PROFESSION.
III.   LORD ONGAR.
IV.   FLORENCE BURTON.
V.   LADY ONGAR'S RETURN.
VI.   THE REV. SAMUEL SAUL.
VII.   SOME SCENES IN THE LIFE OF A COUNTESS.
VIII.   THE HOUSE IN ONSLOW CRESCENT.
IX.   TOO PRUDENT BY HALF.
X.   FLORENCE BURTON AT THE RECTORY.
XI.   SIR HUGH AND HIS BROTHER ARCHIE.
XII.   LADY ONGAR TAKES POSSESSION.
XIII.   A VISITOR CALLS AT ONGAR PARK.
XIV.   COUNT PATEROFF AND HIS SISTER.
XV.   AN EVENING IN BOLTON STREET.
XVI.   THE RIVALS.
XVII.   "LET HER KNOW THAT YOU'RE THERE."
XVIII.   CAPTAIN CLAVERING MAKES HIS FIRST ATTEMPT.
XIX.   THE BLUE POSTS.
XX.   DESOLATION.
XXI.   YES; WRONG;—CERTAINLY WRONG.
XXII.   THE DAY OF THE FUNERAL.
XXIII.   CUMBERLY LANE WITHOUT THE MUD.
XXIV.   THE RUSSIAN SPY.
XXV.   "WHAT WOULD MEN SAY OF YOU?"
XXVI.   THE MAN WHO DUSTED HIS BOOTS WITH HIS HANDKERCHIEF.
XXVII.   FRESHWATER GATE.
XXVIII.   WHAT CECILIA BURTON DID FOR HER SISTER-IN-LAW.
XXIX.   HOW DAMON PARTED FROM PYTHIAS.
XXX.   DOODLES IN MOUNT STREET.
XXXI.   HARRY CLAVERING'S CONFESSION.
XXXII.   FLORENCE BURTON PACKS UP A PACKET.
XXXIII.   SHOWING WHY HARRY CLAVERING WAS WANTED AT THE RECTORY.
XXXIV.   MR. SAUL'S ABODE.
XXXV.   PARTING.
XXXVI.   CAPTAIN CLAVERING MAKES HIS LAST ATTEMPT.
XXXVII.   WHAT LADY ONGAR THOUGHT ABOUT IT.
XXXVIII.  HOW TO DISPOSE OF A WIFE.
XXXIX.   FAREWELL TO DOODLES.
XL.   SHEWING HOW MRS. BURTON FOUGHT HER BATTLE.
XLI.   THE SHEEP RETURNS TO THE FOLD.
XLII.   RESTITUTION.
XLIII.   LADY ONGAR'S REVENGE.
XLIV.   SHEWING WHAT HAPPENED OFF HELIGOLAND.
XLV.   IS SHE MAD?
XLVI.   MADAME GORDELOUP RETIRES FROM BRITISH DIPLOMACY.
XLVII.   SHOWING HOW THINGS SETTLED THEMSELVES AT THE RECTORY.
XLVIII.   CONCLUSION.

 


 

ILLUSTRATIONS

 


 

 

 

CHAPTER I.

JULIA BRABAZON.
 

The gardens of Clavering Park were removed some three hundred yards from the large, square, sombre-looking stone mansion which was the country-house of Sir Hugh Clavering, the eleventh baronet of that name; and in these gardens, which had but little of beauty to recommend them, I will introduce my readers to two of the personages with whom I wish to make them acquainted in the following story. It was now the end of August, and the parterres, beds, and bits of lawn were dry, disfigured, and almost ugly, from the effects of a long drought. In gardens to which care and labour are given abundantly, flower-beds will be pretty, and grass will be green, let the weather be what it may; but care and labour were but scantily bestowed on the Clavering Gardens, and everything was yellow, adust, harsh, and dry. Over the burnt turf towards a gate that led to the house, a lady was walking, and by her side there walked a gentleman.

TThe gardens of Clavering Park were about three hundred yards away from the large, square, gloomy-looking stone mansion that served as the country house of Sir Hugh Clavering, the eleventh baronet of that name. In these gardens, which had little beauty to recommend them, I will introduce my readers to two characters I want you to meet in the following story. It was the end of August, and the flower beds, borders, and patches of lawn were dry, unkempt, and almost unattractive due to a long drought. In gardens that receive plenty of care and attention, flowerbeds will look lovely, and the grass will be green, no matter the weather. However, little care and attention were given to the Clavering Gardens, and everything was yellow, scorched, rough, and dry. A lady was walking over the parched ground toward a gate that led to the house, accompanied by a gentleman.

"You are going in, then, Miss Brabazon," said the gentleman, and it was very manifest from his tone that he intended to convey some deep reproach in his words.

"You’re going in, then, Miss Brabazon," said the gentleman, and it was clear from his tone that he meant to imply some serious reproach in his words.

"Of course I am going in," said the lady. "You asked me to walk with you, and I refused. You have now waylaid me, and therefore I shall escape,—unless I am prevented by violence." As she spoke she stood still for a moment, and looked into his face with a smile which seemed to indicate that if such violence were used, within rational bounds, she would not feel herself driven to great anger.

"Of course I'm going in," said the woman. "You asked me to walk with you, and I said no. Now you've blocked my path, so I'm going to get away—unless you stop me with force." As she spoke, she paused for a moment and looked into his face with a smile that suggested if any force was used, as long as it was reasonable, she wouldn't be too upset.

But though she might be inclined to be playful, he was by no means in that mood. "And why did you refuse me when I asked you?" said he.

But even if she wanted to be playful, he definitely wasn’t in that mood. "Why did you turn me down when I asked you?" he said.

"For two reasons, partly because I thought it better to avoid any conversation with you."

"For two reasons, mainly because I thought it was better to avoid any conversation with you."

"That is civil to an old friend."

"That's nice to an old friend."

"But chiefly,"—and now as she spoke she drew herself up, and dismissed the smile from her face, and allowed her eyes to fall upon the ground;—"but chiefly because I thought that Lord Ongar would prefer that I should not roam alone about Clavering Park with any young gentleman while I am down here; and that he might specially object to my roaming with you, were he to know that you and I were—old acquaintances. Now I have been very frank, Mr. Clavering, and I think that that ought to be enough."

"But mainly,"—and as she said this, she straightened up, wiped the smile from her face, and let her gaze drop to the ground;—"but mainly because I thought that Lord Ongar would rather I didn’t wander around Clavering Park with any young man while I’m here; and he might especially mind if he found out that you and I were—old acquaintances. Now I’ve been very honest, Mr. Clavering, and I think that should be sufficient."

"You are afraid of him already, then?"

"You’re already scared of him, then?"

"I am afraid of offending any one whom I love, and especially any one to whom I owe any duty."

"I’m worried about upsetting anyone I care about, especially those I have a responsibility to."

"Enough! Indeed it is not. From what you know of me do you think it likely that that will be enough?" He was now standing in front of her, between her and the gate, and she made no effort to leave him.

"Enough! It definitely isn't. Based on what you know about me, do you really think that will be enough?" He was now standing right in front of her, blocking her path to the gate, and she didn't try to move past him.

"And what is it you want? I suppose you do not mean to fight Lord Ongar, and that if you did you would not come to me."

"And what do you want? I guess you don't mean to confront Lord Ongar, and if you did, you wouldn't be coming to me."

"Fight him! No; I have no quarrel with him. Fighting him would do no good."

"Fight him! No, I have no issue with him. Fighting him wouldn't help at all."

"None in the least; and he would not fight if you were to ask him; and you could not ask him without being false to me."

"Not at all; he wouldn't fight even if you asked him, and you couldn't ask him without betraying me."

"I should have had an example for that, at any rate."

"I should have had an example for that, anyway."

"That's nonsense, Mr. Clavering. My falsehood, if you should choose to call me false, is of a very different nature, and is pardonable by all laws known to the world."

"That's ridiculous, Mr. Clavering. If you want to call me a liar, my untruth is of a very different kind and is excusable by all the laws recognized in the world."

"You are a jilt,—that is all."

"You're a traitor—that's it."

"Come, Harry, don't use hard words,"—and she put her hand kindly upon his arm. "Look at me, such as I am, and at yourself, and then say whether anything but misery could come of a match between you and me. Our ages by the register are the same, but I am ten years older than you by the world. I have two hundred a year, and I owe at this moment six hundred pounds. You have, perhaps, double as much, and would lose half of that if you married. You are an usher at a school."

"Come on, Harry, don't use harsh words," she said, gently placing her hand on his arm. "Look at me, just the way I am, and then look at yourself, and tell me if anything but heartbreak could come from us being together. According to the records, we’re the same age, but I’m actually ten years older than you in experience. I make two hundred a year, and I currently owe six hundred pounds. You probably make around double that, but you'd lose half if you got married. You work as an usher at a school."

"No, madam, I am not an usher at a school."

"No, ma'am, I'm not a school usher."

"Well, well, you know I don't mean to make you angry."

"Well, I really didn't mean to upset you."

"At the present moment, I am a schoolmaster, and if I remained so, I might fairly look forward to a liberal income. But I am going to give that up."

"Right now, I'm a teacher, and if I stayed in that job, I could reasonably expect a good income. But I'm planning to give that up."

"You will not be more fit for matrimony because you are going to give up your profession. Now Lord Ongar has—heaven knows what;—perhaps sixty thousand a year."

"You won’t be more ready for marriage just because you’re going to quit your job. Now Lord Ongar has—who knows what;—maybe sixty thousand a year."

"In all my life I never heard such effrontery,—such barefaced, shameless worldliness!"

"In my whole life, I’ve never encountered such audacity—such blatant, shameless materialism!"

"Why should I not love a man with a large income?"

"Why shouldn't I love a man with a good income?"

"He is old enough to be your father."

"He's old enough to be your dad."

"He is thirty-six, and I am twenty-four."

"He's 36, and I'm 24."

"Thirty-six!"

"36!"

"There is the Peerage for you to look at. But, my dear Harry, do you not know that you are perplexing me and yourself too, for nothing? I was fool enough when I came here from Nice, after papa's death, to let you talk nonsense to me for a month or two."

"There’s the Peerage for you to check out. But, my dear Harry, don’t you realize that you’re confusing both of us for no reason? I was foolish enough when I came here from Nice, after Dad’s death, to let you ramble on about nonsense for a month or two."

"Did you or did you not swear that you loved me?"

"Did you or did you not promise that you loved me?"

"Oh, Mr. Clavering, I did not imagine that your strength would have condescended to take such advantage over the weakness of a woman. I remember no oaths of any kind, and what foolish assertions I may have made, I am not going to repeat. It must have become manifest to you during these two years that all that was a romance. If it be a pleasure to you to look back to it, of that pleasure I cannot deprive you. Perhaps I also may sometimes look back. But I shall never speak of that time again; and you, if you are as noble as I take you to be, will not speak of it either. I know you would not wish to injure me."

"Oh, Mr. Clavering, I never thought your strength would stoop so low as to take advantage of a woman's weakness. I don't remember making any promises, and whatever silly claims I might have made, I'm not going to go over them again. You must have realized over these two years that it was all just a fantasy. If you find joy in reminiscing about it, I won't take that away from you. Maybe I’ll look back on it sometimes too. But I will never mention that time again; and you, if you’re as honorable as I believe you are, won’t bring it up either. I know you wouldn’t want to hurt me."

"I would wish to save you from the misery you are bringing on yourself."

"I want to save you from the pain you’re causing yourself."

"In that you must allow me to look after myself. Lord Ongar certainly wants a wife, and I intend to be true to him,—and useful."

"In that, you have to let me take care of myself. Lord Ongar definitely needs a wife, and I plan to be loyal to him—and helpful."

"How about love?"

"How about romance?"

"And to love him, sir. Do you think that no man can win a woman's love, unless he is filled to the brim with poetry, and has a neck like Lord Byron, and is handsome like your worship? You are very handsome, Harry, and you, too, should go into the market and make the best of yourself. Why should you not learn to love some nice girl that has money to assist you?"

"And to love him, sir. Do you really think that no man can win a woman's heart unless he’s overflowing with poetry, has a neck like Lord Byron, and is as handsome as you are? You’re very good-looking, Harry, and you, too, should get out there and make the most of yourself. Why shouldn’t you learn to love a nice girl who has money to help you?"

"Julia!"

"Hey, Julia!"

"No, sir; I will not be called Julia. If you do, I will be insulted, and leave you instantly. I may call you Harry, as being so much younger,—though we were born in the same month,—and as a sort of cousin. But I shall never do that after to-day."

"No, sir; I won't be called Julia. If you do, I'll be offended and leave you right away. I might call you Harry since you’re so much younger—though we were born in the same month—and because you’re like a cousin to me. But I won’t do that after today."

"You have courage enough, then, to tell me that you have not ill-used me?"

"You have enough courage to tell me that you haven't mistreated me?"

"Certainly I have. Why, what a fool you would have me be! Look at me, and tell me whether I am fit to be the wife of such a one as you. By the time you are entering the world, I shall be an old woman, and shall have lived my life. Even if I were fit to be your mate when we were living here together, am I fit, after what I have done and seen during the last two years? Do you think it would really do any good to any one if I were to jilt, as you call it, Lord Ongar, and tell them all,—your cousin, Sir Hugh, and my sister, and your father,—that I was going to keep myself up, and marry you when you were ready for me?"

"Of course I have. Why would you want me to be such a fool? Look at me and tell me if I’m really suitable to be the wife of someone like you. By the time you step into the world, I’ll be an old woman, having lived my life. Even if I was suitable to be your partner when we were living here together, am I still after everything I’ve done and seen in the last two years? Do you honestly think it would do any good for anyone if I were to break off things with Lord Ongar, as you put it, and let everyone—your cousin, Sir Hugh, my sister, and your father—know that I was going to keep myself available and marry you when you’re ready?"

"You mean to say that the evil is done."

"You’re saying that the harm has been done."

"No, indeed. At the present moment I owe six hundred pounds, and I don't know where to turn for it, so that my husband may not be dunned for my debts as soon as he has married me. What a wife I should have been for you;—should I not?"

"No, really. Right now, I owe six hundred pounds, and I have no idea where to get it, so my husband doesn't end up being chased for my debts right after we get married. What a wife I would have been for you;—don't you think?"

"I could pay the six hundred pounds for you with money that I have earned myself,—though you do call me an usher;—and perhaps would ask fewer questions about it than Lord Ongar will do with all his thousands."

"I could pay the six hundred pounds for you with money I've earned myself—even if you do call me an usher—and maybe I'd get asked fewer questions about it than Lord Ongar would with all his thousands."

"Dear Harry, I beg your pardon about the usher. Of course, I know that you are a fellow of your college, and that St. Cuthbert's, where you teach the boys, is one of the grandest schools in England; and I hope you'll be a bishop; nay,—I think you will, if you make up your mind to try for it."

"Dear Harry, I'm really sorry about the usher. Of course, I know that you're a fellow at your college, and that St. Cuthbert's, where you teach the boys, is one of the best schools in England; and I hope you'll become a bishop; actually, I believe you will, if you set your mind to it."

"I have given up all idea of going into the church."

"I've completely given up on the idea of becoming a pastor."

"Then you'll be a judge. I know you'll be great and distinguished, and that you'll do it all yourself. You are distinguished already. If you could only know how infinitely I should prefer your lot to mine! Oh, Harry, I envy you! I do envy you! You have got the ball at your feet, and the world before you, and can win everything for yourself."

"Then you'll be a judge. I know you'll be great and accomplished, and that you'll handle it all on your own. You already stand out. If only you knew how much I would prefer your situation to mine! Oh, Harry, I'm jealous of you! I really am! You have everything going for you, and the whole world ahead of you, and you can achieve anything you want."

"But nothing is anything without your love."

"But nothing means anything without your love."

"Psha! Love, indeed. What could I do for you but ruin you? You know it as well as I do; but you are selfish enough to wish to continue a romance which would be absolutely destructive to me, though for a while it might afford a pleasant relaxation to your graver studies. Harry, you can choose in the world. You have divinity, and law, and literature, and art. And if debarred from love now by the exigencies of labour, you will be as fit for love in ten years' time as you are at present."

"Psha! Love, seriously. What could I do for you but mess everything up? You know it just as well as I do, but you’re selfish enough to want to keep this relationship going, even though it would completely destroy me, even if it might give you a nice break from your more serious studies for a bit. Harry, you have so many options in life. You have divinity, law, literature, and art. And if you’re held back from love right now because of your work, you’ll be just as ready for love in ten years as you are now."

"But I do love now."

"But I love now."

"Be a man, then, and keep it to yourself. Love is not to be our master. You can choose, as I say; but I have had no choice,—no choice but to be married well, or to go out like a snuff of a candle. I don't like the snuff of a candle, and, therefore, I am going to be married well."

"Be a man and keep it to yourself. Love shouldn't control us. You have a choice, as I’ve said; but I’ve had no choice—no choice but to marry well or fade away like a candle’s wick. I don’t want to fade away, so I’m going to marry well."

"And that suffices?"

"Is that enough?"

"It must suffice. And why should it not suffice? You are very uncivil, cousin, and very unlike the rest of the world. Everybody compliments me on my marriage. Lord Ongar is not only rich, but he is a man of fashion, and a man of talent."

"It should be enough. And why wouldn’t it be enough? You’re being quite rude, cousin, and different from everyone else. Everyone praises my marriage. Lord Ongar is not only wealthy, but he’s also fashionable and talented."

"Are you fond of race-horses yourself?"

"Are you a fan of racehorses?"

"Very fond of them."

"Really like them."

"And of that kind of life?"

"And what about that kind of life?"

"Very fond of it. I mean to be fond of everything that Lord Ongar likes. I know that I can't change him, and, therefore, I shall not try."

"Really fond of it. I mean to like everything that Lord Ongar likes. I know I can't change him, so I won't even try."

"You are right there, Miss Brabazon."

"You’re right there, Ms. Brabazon."

"You mean to be impertinent, sir; but I will not take it so. This is to be our last meeting in private, and I won't acknowledge that I am insulted. But it must be over now, Harry; and here I have been pacing round and round the garden with you, in spite of my refusal just now. It must not be repeated, or things will be said which I do not mean to have ever said of me. Good-by, Harry."

"You’re trying to be rude, but I won’t take it that way. This is going to be our last private meeting, and I refuse to accept that I've been insulted. But it has to end here, Harry; I’ve been walking around the garden with you, even though I said I wouldn’t. We can’t do this again, or things will be said that I never wanted said about me. Goodbye, Harry."

"Good-by, Julia."

"Goodbye, Julia."

"Well, for that once let it pass. And remember this: I have told you all my hopes, and my one trouble. I have been thus open with you because I thought it might serve to make you look at things in a right light. I trust to your honour as a gentleman to repeat nothing that I have said to you."

"Alright, let's just let it go this time. And remember this: I've shared all my hopes and my one concern with you. I've been this open because I believed it would help you see things clearly. I trust you to respect my word as a gentleman and not share anything I've told you."

"I am not given to repeat such things as those."

"I don't usually repeat things like that."

"I'm sure you are not. And I hope you will not misunderstand the spirit in which they have been spoken. I shall never regret what I have told you now, if it tends to make you perceive that we must both regard our past acquaintance as a romance, which must, from the stern necessity of things, be treated as a dream which we have dreamt, or a poem which we have read."

"I'm sure you're not. And I hope you won't misunderstand the intention behind my words. I will never regret what I've shared with you now, if it helps you realize that we should see our past relationship as a romance, which, due to the harsh realities of life, should be seen as a dream we've had or a poem we've read."

"You can treat it as you please."

"You can handle it however you want."

"God bless you, Harry; and I will always hope for your welfare, and hear of your success with joy. Will you come up and shoot with them on Thursday?"

"God bless you, Harry; and I will always wish you well and feel happy to hear of your success. Will you come up and shoot with them on Thursday?"

"What, with Hugh? No; Hugh and I do not hit it off together. If I shot at Clavering I should have to do it as a sort of head-keeper. It's a higher position, I know, than that of an usher, but it doesn't suit me."

"What about Hugh? No; Hugh and I don’t get along. If I were to take a shot at Clavering, I’d have to do it as a sort of head-keeper. I know it’s a higher position than that of an usher, but it’s just not for me."

"Oh, Harry! that is so cruel! But you will come up to the house. Lord Ongar will be there on the thirty-first; the day after to-morrow, you know."

"Oh, Harry! That's so mean! But you will come to the house. Lord Ongar will be there on the thirty-first; the day after tomorrow, you know."

"I must decline even that temptation. I never go into the house when Hugh is there, except about twice a year on solemn invitation—just to prevent there being a family quarrel."

"I have to turn down even that temptation. I only go into the house when Hugh is there about twice a year when I'm formally invited—just to avoid causing any family drama."

"Good-by, then," and she offered him her hand.

"Goodbye, then," she said, extending her hand to him.

"Good-by, if it must be so."

"Bye, if it has to be."

"I don't know whether you mean to grace my marriage?"

"I don't know if you're planning to bless my marriage?"

"Certainly not. I shall be away from Clavering, so that the marriage bells may not wound my ears. For the matter of that, I shall be at the school."

"Definitely not. I'll be away from Clavering so that the wedding bells won't hurt my ears. In fact, I'll be at the school."

"I suppose we shall meet some day in town."

"I guess we'll run into each other in the city someday."

"Most probably not. My ways and Lord Ongar's will be altogether different, even if I should succeed in getting up to London. If you ever come to see Hermione here, I may chance to meet you in the house. But you will not do that often, the place is so dull and unattractive."

"Most likely not. My methods and Lord Ongar's will be completely different, even if I manage to get up to London. If you ever come to see Hermione here, I might run into you in the house. But you probably won't do that often; the place is so boring and uninviting."

"It is the dearest old park."

"It’s the most beloved old park."

"You won't care much for old parks as Lady Ongar."

"You won't be very fond of old parks like Lady Ongar."

"You don't know what I may care about as Lady Ongar; but as Julia Brabazon I will now say good-by for the last time." Then they parted, and the lady returned to the great house, while Harry Clavering made his way across the park towards the rectory.

"You don't know what I might care about as Lady Ongar; but as Julia Brabazon, I'm going to say goodbye for the last time." Then they parted, and the lady went back to the big house, while Harry Clavering headed across the park towards the rectory.

Three years before this scene in the gardens at Clavering Park, Lord Brabazon had died at Nice, leaving one unmarried daughter, the lady to whom the reader has just been introduced. One other daughter he had, who was then already married to Sir Hugh Clavering, and Lady Clavering was the Hermione of whom mention has already been made. Lord Brabazon, whose peerage had descended to him in a direct line from the time of the Plantagenets, was one of those unfortunate nobles of whom England is burdened with but few, who have no means equal to their rank. He had married late in life, and had died without a male heir. The title which had come from the Plantagenets was now lapsed; and when the last lord died, about four hundred a year was divided between his two daughters. The elder had already made an excellent match, as regarded fortune, in marrying Sir Hugh Clavering; and the younger was now about to make a much more splendid match in her alliance with Lord Ongar. Of them I do not know that it is necessary to say much more at present.

Three years before this scene in the gardens at Clavering Park, Lord Brabazon passed away in Nice, leaving one unmarried daughter, the lady the reader has just been introduced to. He also had another daughter who was already married to Sir Hugh Clavering, and Lady Clavering was the Hermione mentioned earlier. Lord Brabazon, whose title had been passed down in a direct line since the time of the Plantagenets, was one of those unfortunate nobles of whom England has but few, lacking the means to match his rank. He married later in life and died without a male heir. The title that originated with the Plantagenets was now gone; when the last lord died, around four hundred a year was divided between his two daughters. The elder had already made a great match financially by marrying Sir Hugh Clavering, and the younger was about to make an even more impressive match by aligning with Lord Ongar. I don’t think there is much more to say about them at this time.

And of Harry Clavering it perhaps may not be necessary to say much in the way of description. The attentive reader will have already gathered nearly all that should be known of him before he makes himself known by his own deeds. He was the only son of the Reverend Henry Clavering, rector of Clavering, uncle of the present Sir Hugh Clavering, and brother of the last Sir Hugh. The Reverend Henry Clavering, and Mrs. Clavering his wife, and his two daughters, Mary and Fanny Clavering, lived always at Clavering Rectory, on the outskirts of Clavering Park, at a full mile's distance from the house. The church stood in the park, about midway between the two residences. When I have named one more Clavering, Captain Clavering, Captain Archibald Clavering, Sir Hugh's brother, and when I shall have said also that both Sir Hugh and Captain Clavering were men fond of pleasure and fond of money, I shall have said all that I need now say about the Clavering family at large.

And there may not be much to describe about Harry Clavering. The attentive reader has likely already picked up most of what should be known about him before he reveals himself through his actions. He was the only son of Reverend Henry Clavering, the rector of Clavering, and the uncle of the current Sir Hugh Clavering, as well as the brother of the late Sir Hugh. Reverend Henry Clavering, his wife Mrs. Clavering, and their two daughters, Mary and Fanny Clavering, always lived at Clavering Rectory, which was located on the outskirts of Clavering Park, a full mile away from the house. The church was situated in the park, roughly halfway between the two residences. After mentioning one more Clavering, Captain Clavering, Captain Archibald Clavering, Sir Hugh's brother, and noting that both Sir Hugh and Captain Clavering enjoyed pleasure and money, I've shared all I need to about the Clavering family as a whole.

Julia Brabazon had indulged in some reminiscence of the romance of her past poetic life when she talked of cousinship between her and Harry Clavering. Her sister was the wife of Harry Clavering's first cousin, but between her and Harry there was no relationship whatever. When old Lord Brabazon had died at Nice she had come to Clavering Park, and had created some astonishment among those who knew Sir Hugh by making good her footing in his establishment. He was not the man to take up a wife's sister, and make his house her home, out of charity or from domestic love. Lady Clavering, who had been a handsome woman and fashionable withal, no doubt may have had some influence; but Sir Hugh was a man much prone to follow his own courses. It must be presumed that Julia Brabazon had made herself agreeable in the house, and also probably useful. She had been taken to London through two seasons, and had there held up her head among the bravest. And she had been taken abroad,—for Sir Hugh did not love Clavering Park, except during six weeks of partridge shooting; and she had been at Newmarket with them, and at the house of a certain fast hunting duke with whom Sir Hugh was intimate; and at Brighton with her sister, when it suited Sir Hugh to remain alone at the duke's; and then again up in London, where she finally arranged matters with Lord Ongar. It was acknowledged by all the friends of the two families, and indeed I may say of the three families now—among the Brabazon people, and the Clavering people, and the Courton people,—Lord Ongar's family name was Courton,—that Julia Brabazon had been very clever. Of her and Harry Clavering together no one had ever said a word. If any words had been spoken between her and Hermione on the subject, the two sisters had been discreet enough to manage that they should go no further. In those short months of Julia's romance Sir Hugh had been away from Clavering, and Hermione had been much occupied in giving birth to an heir. Julia had now lived past her one short spell of poetry, had written her one sonnet, and was prepared for the business of the world.

Julia Brabazon had been reminiscing about the romance of her past when she spoke about her connection with Harry Clavering. Her sister was married to Harry Clavering's first cousin, but there was no direct relationship between her and Harry. When old Lord Brabazon died in Nice, she came to Clavering Park and surprised those who knew Sir Hugh by establishing herself in his household. He wasn’t the kind of man to take in a wife’s sister and make her feel at home out of charity or domestic affection. Lady Clavering, who had once been a beautiful and fashionable woman, may have had some influence, but Sir Hugh was a man who preferred to follow his own path. It can be assumed that Julia Brabazon made herself pleasant and probably useful in the house. She had been taken to London for two seasons, where she held her own among the elite. She had traveled abroad—as Sir Hugh only liked Clavering Park for six weeks of partridge shooting—and had been to Newmarket with them, to the home of a certain flashy hunting duke who was a friend of Sir Hugh’s, and to Brighton with her sister when it was convenient for Sir Hugh to stay behind at the duke’s. Then she was back in London, where she eventually sorted things out with Lord Ongar. It was generally acknowledged by friends from all three families—the Brabazons, Claverings, and Courtons (Lord Ongar’s family name)—that Julia Brabazon was quite clever. No one had ever mentioned her and Harry Clavering as a couple. If there had been any discussions between her and Hermione about it, the sisters had been discreet enough to keep it private. During those few months of Julia's romance, Sir Hugh had been away from Clavering, and Hermione had been busy giving birth to an heir. Now, Julia had moved past her brief moment of romance, had written one sonnet, and was ready for the realities of life.

 

 

CHAPTER II.

HARRY CLAVERING CHOOSES HIS PROFESSION.

Harry Clavering might not be an usher, but, nevertheless, he was home for the holidays. And who can say where the usher ends and the schoolmaster begins? He, perhaps, may properly be called an usher, who is hired by a private schoolmaster to assist himself in his private occupation, whereas Harry Clavering had been selected by a public body out of a hundred candidates, with much real or pretended reference to certificates of qualification. He was certainly not an usher, as he was paid three hundred a year for his work,—which is quite beyond the mark of ushers. So much was certain; but yet the word stuck in his throat and made him uncomfortable. He did not like to reflect that he was home for the holidays.

Harry Clavering might not be an usher, but he was definitely home for the holidays. And who can really say where the usher ends and the schoolmaster begins? Someone could be considered an usher if they are hired by a private schoolmaster to help out with his private work, while Harry Clavering had been chosen by a public committee from a hundred candidates, based on real or at least pretended qualifications. He was definitely not an usher, since he earned three hundred a year for his job—which is well above what ushers make. That much was clear; however, the term still made him uncomfortable. He didn’t like thinking about the fact that he was home for the holidays.

But he had determined that he would never come home for the holidays again. At Christmas he would leave the school at which he had won his appointment with so much trouble, and go into an open profession. Indeed he had chosen his profession, and his mode of entering it. He would become a civil engineer, and perhaps a land surveyor, and with this view he would enter himself as a pupil in the great house of Beilby and Burton. The terms even had been settled. He was to pay a premium of five hundred pounds and join Mr. Burton, who was settled in the town of Stratton, for twelve months before he placed himself in Mr. Beilby's office in London. Stratton was less than twenty miles from Clavering. It was a comfort to him to think that he could pay this five hundred pounds out of his own earnings, without troubling his father. It was a comfort, even though he had earned that money by "ushering" for the last two years.

But he had decided that he would never come home for the holidays again. At Christmas, he would leave the school where he had worked so hard to get his position and enter a more public profession. In fact, he had chosen his career path and how he would get there. He would become a civil engineer and maybe a land surveyor, and to this end, he would enroll as a trainee at the prominent firm of Beilby and Burton. The terms had even been agreed upon. He was to pay a fee of five hundred pounds and would work with Mr. Burton, who was based in the town of Stratton, for a year before he moved to Mr. Beilby's office in London. Stratton was less than twenty miles from Clavering. It was reassuring for him to know that he could pay this five hundred pounds from his own earnings, without having to ask his father for help. It was comforting, even though he had made that money by "ushering" for the past two years.

When he left Julia Brabazon in the garden, Harry Clavering did not go at once home to the rectory, but sauntered out all alone into the park, intending to indulge in reminiscences of his past romance. It was all over, that idea of having Julia Brabazon for his love; and now he had to ask himself whether he intended to be made permanently miserable by her worldly falseness, or whether he would borrow something of her worldly wisdom, and agree with himself to look back on what was past as a pleasurable excitement in his boyhood. Of course we all know that really permanent misery was in truth out of the question. Nature had not made him physically or mentally so poor a creature as to be incapable of a cure. But on this occasion he decided on permanent misery. There was about his heart,—about his actual anatomical heart, with its internal arrangement of valves and blood-vessels,—a heavy dragging feeling that almost amounted to corporeal pain, and which he described to himself as agony. Why should this rich, debauched, disreputable lord have the power of taking the cup from his lip, the one morsel of bread which he coveted from his mouth, his one ingot of treasure out of his coffer? Fight him! No, he knew he could not fight Lord Ongar. The world was against such an arrangement. And in truth Harry Clavering had so much contempt for Lord Ongar, that he had no wish to fight so poor a creature. The man had had delirium tremens, and was a worn-out miserable object. So at least Harry Clavering was only too ready to believe. He did not care much for Lord Ongar in the matter. His anger was against her;—that she should have deserted him for a miserable creature, who had nothing to back him but wealth and rank!

When he left Julia Brabazon in the garden, Harry Clavering didn’t head straight home to the rectory. Instead, he strolled alone into the park, planning to reflect on his past romance. That idea of having Julia Brabazon as his love was completely over; now he had to ask himself if he was willing to remain permanently unhappy because of her superficiality or if he would take a piece of her worldly wisdom and choose to remember the past as an exciting time in his youth. Of course, deep down, he knew that lasting misery was not a real option. Nature hadn’t made him so physically or mentally weak that he couldn’t recover. Yet, on this occasion, he chose to embrace permanent misery. There was a heavy, dragging feeling in his heart—his actual heart, with its valves and blood vessels—that felt like real pain, which he labeled as agony. Why should this wealthy, corrupt, disreputable lord have the ability to take away the thing he desired most, the one piece of bread he craved, the one treasure he had? Fight him? No, he knew he couldn’t take on Lord Ongar. The world was against that kind of scenario. In truth, Harry Clavering held so much disdain for Lord Ongar that he didn’t want to bother fighting such a pathetic person. The man had suffered from delirium tremens and was a worn-out, miserable figure. At least, that’s what Harry Clavering was all too willing to believe. He didn’t really care about Lord Ongar; his anger was directed at her—for choosing to leave him for a pathetic person who had nothing to offer but wealth and status!

There was wretchedness in every view of the matter. He loved her so well, and yet he could do nothing! He could take no step towards saving her or assisting himself. The marriage bells would ring within a month from the present time, and his own father would go to the church and marry them. Unless Lord Ongar were to die before then by God's hand, there could be no escape,—and of such escape Harry Clavering had no thought. He felt a weary, dragging soreness at his heart, and told himself that he must be miserable for ever,—not so miserable but what he would work, but so wretched that the world could have for him no satisfaction.

There was misery in every aspect of the situation. He loved her so deeply, yet he felt utterly powerless! He couldn't take any steps to save her or help himself. The wedding bells would ring in a month, and his own father would go to the church and marry them. Unless Lord Ongar were to die before then by divine intervention, there was no way out—and Harry Clavering didn’t even consider any escape. He felt a heavy, aching pain in his heart and told himself that he would be miserable forever—not so miserable that he wouldn't work, but so wretched that the world held no joy for him.

What could he do? What thing could he achieve so that she should know that he did not let her go from him without more thought than his poor words had expressed? He was perfectly aware that in their conversation she had had the best of the argument,—that he had talked almost like a boy, while she had talked quite like a woman. She had treated him de haut en bas with all that superiority which youth and beauty give to a young woman over a very young man. What could he do? Before he returned to the rectory, he had made up his mind what he would do, and on the following morning Julia Brabazon received by the hands of her maid the following note:—

What could he do? What could he accomplish so that she would understand he didn’t let her go without considering it more deeply than his simple words had conveyed? He knew very well that during their conversation, she had dominated the discussion—he had sounded almost like a kid, while she had spoken like a true woman. She had looked down on him with all the confidence that youth and beauty give a young woman over a much younger man. What could he do? Before he went back to the rectory, he decided what he would do, and the next morning, Julia Brabazon received the following note from her maid: note:—

"I think I understood all that you said to me yesterday. At any rate, I understand that you have one trouble left, and that I have the means of curing it." In the first draft of his letter he said something about ushering, but that he omitted afterwards. "You may be assured that the enclosed is all my own, and that it is entirely at my own disposal. You may also be quite sure of good faith on the part of the lender.—H. C." And in this letter he enclosed a cheque for six hundred pounds. It was the money which he had saved since he took his degree, and had been intended for Messrs. Beilby and Burton. But he would wait another two years,—continuing to do his ushering for her sake. What did it matter to a man who must, under any circumstances, be permanently miserable?

"I think I got everything you said to me yesterday. Anyway, I understand that you have one last problem, and I can help fix it." In the first draft of his letter, he mentioned something about ushering, but he left that out later. "You can be sure that the enclosed is entirely mine, and it’s completely at my disposal. You can also be certain of the lender’s good faith.—H. C." And in this letter, he included a check for six hundred pounds. It was the money he had saved since graduating, which was supposed to go to Messrs. Beilby and Burton. But he would wait another two years—continuing to do his ushering for her sake. What did it matter to a man who, in any case, was destined to be permanently miserable?

Sir Hugh was not yet at Clavering. He was to come with Lord Ongar on the eve of the partridge-shooting. The two sisters, therefore, had the house all to themselves. At about twelve they sat down to breakfast together in a little upstairs chamber adjoining Lady Clavering's own room, Julia Brabazon at that time having her lover's generous letter in her pocket. She knew that it was as improper as it was generous, and that, moreover, it was very dangerous. There was no knowing what might be the result of such a letter should Lord Ongar even know that she had received it. She was not absolutely angry with Harry, but had, to herself, twenty times called him a foolish, indiscreet, dear generous boy. But what was she to do with the cheque? As to that, she had hardly as yet made up her mind when she joined her sister on the morning in question. Even to Hermione she did not dare to tell the fact that such a letter had been received by her.

Sir Hugh wasn't at Clavering yet. He was supposed to arrive with Lord Ongar the night before the partridge shooting. So, the two sisters had the house all to themselves. Around noon, they sat down for breakfast in a small upstairs room next to Lady Clavering's own room. At that moment, Julia Brabazon had her lover's generous letter tucked in her pocket. She knew it was both inappropriate and generous, and it was also very risky. There was no telling what could happen if Lord Ongar found out she had received such a letter. She wasn't exactly angry with Harry, but she had called him a foolish, indiscreet, dear generous boy to herself at least twenty times. But what was she supposed to do with the check? She hadn't really made up her mind about that when she met her sister that morning. She couldn't even bring herself to tell Hermione that she had received such a letter.

But in truth her debts were a great torment to her; and yet how trifling they were when compared with the wealth of the man who was to become her husband in six weeks! Let her marry him, and not pay them, and he probably would never be the wiser. They would get themselves paid almost without his knowledge, perhaps altogether without his hearing of them. But yet she feared him, knowing him to be greedy about money; and, to give her such merit as was due to her, she felt the meanness of going to her husband with debts on her shoulder. She had five thousand pounds of her own; but the very settlement which gave her a noble dower, and which made the marriage so brilliant, made over this small sum in its entirety to her lord. She had been wrong not to tell the lawyer of her trouble when he had brought the paper for her to sign; but she had not told him. If Sir Hugh Clavering had been her own brother there would have been no difficulty, but he was only her brother-in-law, and she feared to speak to him. Her sister, however, knew that there were debts, and on that subject she was not afraid to speak to Hermione.

But in reality, her debts were a huge source of stress for her; and yet how insignificant they were compared to the wealth of the man she was set to marry in six weeks! If she married him without paying them off, he probably wouldn’t even find out. They could get paid back almost without his knowing, maybe even without him hearing about it at all. But still, she was afraid of him, knowing he was greedy when it came to money; and to give her credit where it was due, she felt it was shameful to bring debts into her marriage. She had five thousand pounds of her own, but the very settlement that provided her with a generous dowry and made the marriage so glamorous allocated that entire amount to her husband. She knew she should have mentioned her troubles to the lawyer when he brought the document for her to sign, but she didn’t. If Sir Hugh Clavering had been her brother, there would have been no issue, but since he was only her brother-in-law, she hesitated to talk to him. However, her sister was aware of the debts, and on that topic, she wasn’t afraid to confide in Hermione.

"Hermy," said she, "what am I to do about this money that I owe? I got a bill from Colclugh's this morning."

"Hermy," she said, "what should I do about the money I owe? I got a bill from Colclugh's this morning."

"Just because he knows you're going to be married; that's all."

"Just because he knows you're getting married; that's all."

"But how am I to pay him?"

"But how am I supposed to pay him?"

"Take no notice of it till next spring. I don't know what else you can do. You'll be sure to have money when you come back from the Continent."

"Don't worry about it until next spring. I don't know what else you can do. You'll definitely have money when you return from the Continent."

"You couldn't lend it me; could you?"

"You couldn't lend it to me, could you?"

"Who? I? Did you ever know me have any money in hand since I was married? I have the name of an allowance, but it is always spent before it comes to me, and I am always in debt."

"Who? Me? Have you ever known me to have any money since I got married? I have an allowance, but it's always gone before I even see it, and I'm constantly in debt."

"Would Hugh—let me have it?"

"Can Hugh—let me have it?"

"What, give it you?"

"What, are you giving it?"

"Well, it wouldn't be so very much for him. I never asked him for a pound yet."

"Well, it wouldn't be such a big deal for him. I’ve never asked him for a pound yet."

"I think he would say something you wouldn't like if you were to ask him; but, of course, you can try it if you please."

"I think he would say something you wouldn't like if you asked him; but, of course, you can give it a try if you want."

"Then what am I to do?"

"What should I do then?"

"Lord Ongar should have let you keep your own fortune. It would have been nothing to him."

"Lord Ongar should have allowed you to keep your own money. It wouldn't have meant anything to him."

"Hugh didn't let you keep your own fortune."

"Hugh didn't allow you to keep your own fortune."

"But the money which will be nothing to Lord Ongar was a good deal to Hugh. You're going to have sixty thousand a year, while we have to do with seven or eight. Besides, I hadn't been out in London, and it wasn't likely I should owe much in Nice. He did ask me, and there was something."

"But the money that won’t mean much to Lord Ongar is a big deal for Hugh. You’re about to have sixty thousand a year, while we have to manage with seven or eight. Plus, I hadn’t been out in London, and it wasn’t likely I’d owe much in Nice. He did ask me, and there was something."

"What am I to do, Hermy?"

"What do I do, Hermy?"

"Write and ask Lord Ongar to let you have what you want out of your own money. Write to-day, so that he may get your letter before he comes."

"Write and ask Lord Ongar to give you what you want from your own money. Write today, so he gets your letter before he arrives."

"Oh, dear! oh, dear! I never wrote a word to him yet, and to begin with asking him for money!"

"Oh no! Oh no! I haven't written him a single word yet, and I'm starting off by asking him for money!"

"I don't think he can be angry with you for that."

"I don’t think he can be mad at you for that."

"I shouldn't know what to say. Would you write it for me, and let me see how it looks?"

"I’m not sure what to say. Could you write it for me and show me how it looks?"

This Lady Clavering did; and had she refused to do it, I think that poor Harry Clavering's cheque would have been used. As it was, Lady Clavering wrote the letter to "My dear Lord Ongar," and it was copied and signed by "Yours most affectionately, Julia Brabazon." The effect of this was the receipt of a cheque for a thousand pounds in a very pretty note from Lord Ongar, which the lord brought with him to Clavering, and sent up to Julia as he was dressing for dinner. It was an extremely comfortable arrangement, and Julia was very glad of the money,—feeling it to be a portion of that which was her own. And Harry's cheque had been returned to him on the day of its receipt. "Of course I cannot take it, and of course you should not have sent it." These words were written on the morsel of paper in which the money was returned. But Miss Brabazon had torn the signature off the cheque, so that it might be safe, whereas Harry Clavering had taken no precaution with it whatever. But then Harry Clavering had not lived two years in London.

This Lady Clavering did; and if she had refused, I think poor Harry Clavering's check would have been used. As it was, Lady Clavering wrote the letter to "My dear Lord Ongar," which was copied and signed "Yours most affectionately, Julia Brabazon." The result was that she received a check for a thousand pounds in a very nice note from Lord Ongar, which he brought with him to Clavering and sent up to Julia while he was getting ready for dinner. It was a very convenient arrangement, and Julia was really happy to have the money, feeling it was part of what was rightfully hers. Harry's check had been returned to him on the day he received it. "Of course I cannot take it, and of course you should not have sent it." These words were written on the small piece of paper that accompanied the returned money. But Miss Brabazon had torn off the signature from the check to keep it safe, while Harry Clavering had taken no precautions at all with his. But then again, Harry Clavering hadn't lived in London for two years.

During the hours that the cheque was away from him, Harry had told his father that perhaps, even yet, he might change his purpose as to going to Messrs. Beilby and Burton. He did not know, he said, but he was still in doubt. This had sprung from some chance question which his father had asked, and which had seemed to demand an answer. Mr. Clavering greatly disliked the scheme of life which his son had made. Harry's life hitherto had been prosperous and very creditable. He had gone early to Cambridge, and at twenty-two had become a fellow of his college. This fellowship he could hold for five or six years without going into orders. It would then lead to a living, and would in the meantime afford a livelihood. But, beyond this, Harry, with an energy which he certainly had not inherited from his father, had become a schoolmaster, and was already a rich man. He had done more than well, and there was a great probability that between them they might be able to buy the next presentation to Clavering, when the time should come in which Sir Hugh should determine on selling it. That Sir Hugh should give the family living to his cousin was never thought probable by any of the family at the rectory; but he might perhaps part with it under such circumstances on favourable terms. For all these reasons the father was very anxious that his son should follow out the course for which he had been intended; but that he, being unenergetic and having hitherto done little for his son, should dictate to a young man who had been energetic, and who had done much for himself, was out of the question. Harry, therefore, was to be the arbiter of his own fate. But when Harry received back the cheque from Julia Brabazon, then he again returned to his resolution respecting Messrs. Beilby and Burton, and took the first opportunity of telling his father that such was the case.

During the time the check was away from him, Harry told his dad that maybe, even now, he might change his mind about going to Messrs. Beilby and Burton. He wasn't sure, he said, but he was still uncertain. This came up from a random question his father had asked, which seemed to need a response. Mr. Clavering was really not on board with the life plan his son had created. Harry’s life up to that point had been successful and quite impressive. He had started at Cambridge early, and by the age of twenty-two, he had become a fellow of his college. He could hold this fellowship for five or six years without needing to enter the clergy. After that, it would lead to a position, and in the meantime, it would provide a living. But, in addition to this, Harry, with an ambition he definitely didn’t get from his dad, had become a schoolmaster and was already quite wealthy. He had done exceptionally well, and there was a strong chance that together they could buy the next presentation to Clavering when Sir Hugh decided to sell it. The family at the rectory never thought it was likely that Sir Hugh would hand the family living to his cousin, but he might consider selling it under the right conditions. Because of all these reasons, the father was very eager for his son to follow the path laid out for him; however, since he lacked energy and had done little for his son until now, it was out of the question for him to dictate to a young man who had been proactive and accomplished a lot for himself. So, Harry was to have control over his own future. But when Harry got the check back from Julia Brabazon, he returned to his decision regarding Messrs. Beilby and Burton and took the first chance to tell his father that was the case.

After breakfast he followed his father into his study, and there, sitting in two easy-chairs opposite to each other, they lit each a cigar. Such was the reverend gentleman's custom in the afternoon, and such also in the morning. I do not know whether the smoking of four or five cigars daily by the parson of a parish may now-a-day be considered as a vice in him, but if so, it was the only vice with which Mr. Clavering could be charged. He was a kind, soft-hearted, gracious man, tender to his wife, whom he ever regarded as the angel of his house, indulgent to his daughters, whom he idolized, ever patient with his parishioners, and awake,—though not widely awake,—to the responsibilities of his calling. The world had been too comfortable for him, and also too narrow; so that he had sunk into idleness. The world had given him much to eat and drink, but it had given him little to do, and thus he had gradually fallen away from his early purposes, till his energy hardly sufficed for the doing of that little. His living gave him eight hundred a year; his wife's fortune nearly doubled that. He had married early, and had got his living early, and had been very prosperous. But he was not a happy man. He knew that he had put off the day of action till the power of action had passed away from him. His library was well furnished, but he rarely read much else than novels and poetry; and of late years the reading even of poetry had given way to the reading of novels. Till within ten years of the hour of which I speak, he had been a hunting parson,—not hunting loudly, but following his sport as it is followed by moderate sportsmen. Then there had come a new bishop, and the new bishop had sent for him,—nay, finally had come to him, and had lectured him with blatant authority. "My lord," said the parson of Clavering, plucking up something of his past energy, as the colour rose to his face, "I think you are wrong in this. I think you are specially wrong to interfere with me in this way on your first coming among us. You feel it to be your duty, no doubt; but to me it seems that you mistake your duty. But, as the matter is one simply of my own pleasure, I shall give it up." After that Mr. Clavering hunted no more, and never spoke a good word to any one of the bishop of his diocese. For myself, I think it as well that clergymen should not hunt; but had I been the parson of Clavering, I should, under those circumstances, have hunted double.

After breakfast, he followed his father into his study, where they both sat in easy chairs facing each other and lit up a cigar. This was the reverend gentleman's routine in the afternoon and also in the morning. I’m not sure if smoking four or five cigars a day is considered a vice these days, but if it is, that was the only vice Mr. Clavering had. He was a kind, soft-hearted, gracious man who was gentle with his wife, whom he saw as the angel of his home, indulgent to his daughters, whom he adored, and always patient with his parishioners. He was aware—though not extremely so—of the responsibilities that came with his role. The world had been too easy and too limiting for him, leading him to become idle. While the world provided him plenty to eat and drink, it offered him little to do, and he gradually strayed from his early ambitions, until he barely had the energy for the little that was left. His income was eight hundred a year, and his wife’s fortune nearly doubled that. He had married young, secured his position early, and had been quite successful. But he was not a happy man. He realized he had delayed taking action until the capacity for it slipped away from him. His library was well-stocked, but he mostly read novels and poetry, and over the years, even poetry had taken a backseat to novels. Until about ten years before the time I refer to, he had been a hunting parson—not loudly hunting, but enjoying his pastime like a casual sportsman. Then a new bishop arrived and called for him—actually came to see him and lectured him with forceful authority. "My lord," said the parson of Clavering, regaining some of his former energy as he felt color rise to his face, "I think you’re mistaken here. I believe you’re particularly wrong to interfere with me this way on your first arrival among us. You feel it’s your duty, no doubt; but to me, it seems like you are misunderstanding your duty. However, since this is about my own enjoyment, I will give it up." After that, Mr. Clavering stopped hunting and never spoke kindly of the bishop to anyone. Personally, I think it's better that clergymen don't hunt, but if I were in Mr. Clavering's position, I would’ve hunted even more under those circumstances.

Mr. Clavering hunted no more, and probably smoked a greater number of cigars in consequence. He had an increased amount of time at his disposal, but did not, therefore, give more time to his duties. Alas! what time did he give to his duties? He kept a most energetic curate, whom he allowed to do almost what he would with the parish. Every-day services he did prohibit, declaring that he would not have the parish church made ridiculous; but in other respects his curate was the pastor. Once every Sunday he read the service, and once every Sunday he preached, and he resided in his parsonage ten months every year. His wife and daughters went among the poor,—and he smoked cigars in his library. Though not yet fifty, he was becoming fat and idle,—unwilling to walk, and not caring much even for such riding as the bishop had left to him. And, to make matters worse,—far worse, he knew all this of himself, and understood it thoroughly. "I see a better path, and know how good it is, but I follow ever the worse." He was saying that to himself daily, and was saying it always without hope.

Mr. Clavering stopped hunting and probably smoked a lot more cigars because of it. He had more free time, but that didn’t mean he dedicated more time to his responsibilities. Unfortunately, how much time did he really spend on his duties? He had a very energetic curate whom he let run the parish almost however he pleased. He did ban everyday services, insisting he didn’t want the parish church to look foolish; however, in other aspects, his curate was the one in charge. He read the service and preached once every Sunday, and he spent ten months a year at his parsonage. His wife and daughters engaged with the poor while he stayed in his library and smoked cigars. Although he wasn’t yet fifty, he was becoming overweight and lazy, unwilling to walk much and not even interested in the limited riding that the bishop allowed him. To make matters even worse—much worse—he was aware of all this about himself and fully understood it. "I see a better path and know how good it is, but I always choose the worse one." He repeated this to himself every day and always did so without any hope.

And his wife had given him up. She had given him up, not with disdainful rejection, nor with contempt in her eye, or censure in her voice, not with diminution of love or of outward respect. She had given him up as a man abandons his attempts to make his favourite dog take the water. He would fain that the dog he loves should dash into the stream as other dogs will do. It is, to his thinking, a noble instinct in a dog. But his dog dreads the water. As, however, he has learned to love the beast, he puts up with this mischance, and never dreams of banishing poor Ponto from his hearth because of this failure. And so it was with Mrs. Clavering and her husband at the rectory. He understood it all. He knew that he was so far rejected; and he acknowledged to himself the necessity for such rejection.

And his wife had given up on him. She had let go, not with angry rejection, nor with contempt in her eyes, or scolding in her voice, and not with any lessening of love or outward respect. She had given him up like a man who stops trying to make his favorite dog go into the water. He wishes that the dog he loves would jump into the stream like other dogs do. To him, it seems like a noble instinct in a dog. But his dog is afraid of the water. However, since he has learned to love the animal, he accepts this flaw and never thinks of kicking poor Ponto out of his home because of it. And so it was with Mrs. Clavering and her husband at the rectory. He understood everything. He knew that he had been rejected to some extent; and he acknowledged to himself that this rejection was necessary.

"It is a very serious thing to decide upon," he said, when his son had spoken to him.

"It’s a really big decision," he said, after his son had talked to him.

"Yes; it is serious,—about as serious a thing as a man can think of; but a man cannot put it off on that account. If I mean to make such a change in my plans, the sooner I do it the better."

"Yeah; it’s serious—about as serious as anything a person can think of; but you can’t just avoid it because of that. If I’m going to make such a big change in my plans, the sooner I do it, the better."

"But yesterday you were in another mind."

"But yesterday you had a different mindset."

"No, father, not in another mind. I did not tell you then, nor can I tell you all now. I had thought that I should want my money for another purpose for a year or two; but that I have abandoned."

"No, dad, not in a different mindset. I didn't tell you before, and I can't share everything with you now. I thought I would need my money for something else for a year or two, but I've given that up."

"Is the purpose a secret, Harry?"

"Is the purpose a secret, Harry?"

"It is a secret, because it concerns another person."

"It’s a secret because it involves someone else."

"You were going to lend your money to some one?"

"You were going to lend your money to someone?"

"I must keep it a secret, though you know I seldom have any secrets from you. That idea, however, is abandoned, and I mean to go over to Stratton to-morrow, and tell Mr. Burton that I shall be there after Christmas. I must be at St. Cuthbert's on Tuesday."

"I have to keep it a secret, even though you know I rarely keep things from you. That idea, though, is off the table, and I plan to head over to Stratton tomorrow to let Mr. Burton know that I'll be there after Christmas. I need to be at St. Cuthbert's on Tuesday."

Then they both sat silent for a while, silently blowing out their clouds of smoke. The son had said all that he cared to say, and would have wished that there might then be an end of it; but he knew that his father had much on his mind, and would fain express, if he could express it without too much trouble, or without too evident a need of self-reproach, his own thoughts on the subject. "You have made up your mind, then, altogether that you do not like the church as a profession," he said at last.

Then they both sat quietly for a while, blowing out their clouds of smoke. The son had said everything he wanted to say and wished it could just end there; but he knew his father had a lot on his mind and would like to share his thoughts on the matter, if he could do so without too much effort or obvious self-blame. "So, you've completely decided that you don't want to pursue the church as a profession," he finally said.

"I think I have, father."

"I think I have, Dad."

"And on what grounds? The grounds which recommend it to you are very strong. Your education has adapted you for it. Your success in it is already ensured by your fellowship. In a great degree you have entered it as a profession already, by taking a fellowship. What you are doing is not choosing a line in life, but changing one already chosen. You are making of yourself a rolling stone."

"And for what reason? The reasons for pursuing this are very compelling. Your education has prepared you for it. Your success is already guaranteed by your fellowship. In many ways, you’ve already embarked on this as a career by accepting a fellowship. You’re not just picking a path in life, but altering one you’ve already chosen. You’re turning yourself into a rolling stone."

"A stone should roll till it has come to the spot that suits it."

"A stone should roll until it reaches the place where it belongs."

"Why not give up the school if it irks you?"

"Why not just leave school if it bothers you?"

"And become a Cambridge Don, and practise deportment among the undergraduates."

"And become a Cambridge professor, and show off your manners among the students."

"I don't see that you need do that. You need not even live at Cambridge. Take a church in London. You would be sure to get one by holding up your hand. If that, with your fellowship, is not sufficient, I will give you what more you want."

"I don't think you need to do that. You don't even have to live in Cambridge. Just take a church in London. You'd be sure to get one by raising your hand. If that, along with your fellowship, isn’t enough, I’ll give you whatever else you need."

"No, father—no. By God's blessing I will never ask you for a pound. I can hold my fellowship for four years longer without orders, and in four years' time I think I can earn my bread."

"No, dad—no. With God’s blessing, I will never ask you for a penny. I can keep my fellowship for four more years without being ordained, and in four years, I believe I can make a living."

"I don't doubt that, Harry."

"I believe that, Harry."

"Then why should I not follow my wishes in this matter? The truth is, I do not feel myself qualified to be a good clergyman."

"Then why shouldn't I pursue what I want in this situation? The truth is, I don't feel capable of being a good clergyman."

"It is not that you have doubts, is it?"

"It’s not that you have doubts, is it?"

"I might have them if I came to think much about it,—as I must do if I took orders. And I do not wish to be crippled in doing what I think lawful by conventional rules. A rebellious clergyman is, I think, a sorry object. It seems to me that he is a bird fouling his own nest. Now, I know I should be a rebellious clergyman."

"I might have these thoughts if I pondered on them for too long—like I would need to if I took holy orders. And I don't want to be limited in doing what I believe is right by traditional rules. A rebellious clergyman is, in my opinion, a pathetic sight. It feels to me like he's messing up his own home. Honestly, I know I would be that rebellious clergyman."

"In our church the life of a clergyman is as the life of any other gentleman,—within very broad limits."

"In our church, the life of a clergyman is similar to that of any other gentleman—within very broad limits."

"Then why did Bishop Proudie interfere with your hunting?"

"Then why did Bishop Proudie get involved with your hunting?"

"Limits may be very broad, Harry, and yet exclude hunting. Bishop Proudie was vulgar and intrusive, such being the nature of his wife, who instructs him; but if you were in orders I should be very sorry to see you take to hunting."

"Limits can be quite broad, Harry, and still leave out hunting. Bishop Proudie was crass and meddlesome, which is typical of his wife, who guides him; however, if you were in the clergy, I would really dislike seeing you take up hunting."

"It seems to me that a clergyman has nothing to do in life unless he is always preaching and teaching. Look at Saul,"—Mr. Saul was the curate of Clavering—"he is always preaching and teaching. He is doing the best he can; and what a life of it he has. He has literally thrown off all worldly cares,—and consequently everybody laughs at him, and nobody loves him. I don't believe a better man breathes, but I shouldn't like his life."

"It seems to me that a clergyman has no purpose in life unless he’s constantly preaching and teaching. Look at Saul,"—Mr. Saul was the curate of Clavering—"he's always preaching and teaching. He’s doing the best he can, but what a life he has. He’s completely shed all worldly concerns,—and as a result, everyone laughs at him, and nobody loves him. I don’t believe there’s a better man out there, but I wouldn’t want his life."

At this point there was another pause, which lasted till the cigars had come to an end. Then, as he threw the stump into the fire, Mr. Clavering spoke again. "The truth is, Harry, that you have had, all your life, a bad example before you."

At this point, there was another pause that lasted until the cigars were finished. Then, as he tossed the stub into the fire, Mr. Clavering spoke up again. "The truth is, Harry, you've had a bad example in front of you your whole life."

"No, father."

"No, Dad."

"Yes, my son;—let me speak on to the end, and then you can say what you please. In me you have had a bad example on one side, and now, in poor Saul, you have a bad example on the other side. Can you fancy no life between the two, which would fit your physical nature, which is larger than his, and your mental wants, which are higher than mine? Yes, they are, Harry. It is my duty to say this, but it would be unseemly that there should be any controversy between us on the subject."

"Yes, my son; let me finish what I have to say, and then you can share your thoughts. You've had a poor example from me on one side, and now with Saul, you have another bad example on the other side. Can you not imagine a life that fits your physical nature, which is bigger than his, and your mental needs, which are greater than mine? Yes, they are, Harry. I have to say this, but it wouldn’t be right for us to argue about it."

"If you choose to stop me in that way—"

"If you decide to stop me like that—"

"I do choose to stop you in that way. As for Saul, it is impossible that you should become such a man as he. It is not that he mortifies his flesh, but that he has no flesh to mortify. He is unconscious of the flavour of venison, or the scent of roses, or the beauty of women. He is an exceptional specimen of a man, and you need no more fear, than you should venture to hope, that you could become such as he is."

"I choose to stop you like this. As for Saul, there's no way you could become a man like him. It’s not that he punishes his body, but that he doesn't have a body to punish. He doesn’t know the taste of venison, the smell of roses, or the beauty of women. He is an extraordinary example of a man, and you should not be more afraid than you should dare to hope that you could ever be like him."

At this point they were interrupted by the entrance of Fanny Clavering, who came to say that Mr. Saul was in the drawing-room. "What does he want, Fanny?" This question Mr. Clavering asked half in a whisper, but with something of comic humour in his face, as though partly afraid that Mr. Saul should hear it, and partly intending to convey a wish that he might escape Mr. Saul, if it were possible.

At this moment, they were interrupted by Fanny Clavering walking in to say that Mr. Saul was in the drawing room. "What does he want, Fanny?" Mr. Clavering asked, half whispering, with a hint of humor on his face, as if he was partly worried that Mr. Saul might hear him and partly hoping that he could avoid Mr. Saul if possible.

"It's about the iron church, papa. He says it is come,—or part of it has come,—and he wants you to go out to Cumberly Green about the site."

"He's talking about the iron church, Dad. He says it's here—or at least part of it is—and he wants you to head out to Cumberly Green to check out the site."

"I thought that was all settled."

"I thought that was all taken care of."

"He says not."

"He says no."

"What does it matter where it is? He can put it anywhere he likes on the Green. However, I had better go to him." So Mr. Clavering went. Cumberly Green was a hamlet in the parish of Clavering, three miles distant from the church, the people of which had got into a wicked habit of going to a dissenting chapel near to them. By Mr. Saul's energy, but chiefly out of Mr. Clavering's purse, an iron chapel had been purchased for a hundred and fifty pounds, and Mr. Saul proposed to add to his own duties the pleasing occupation of walking to Cumberly Green every Sunday morning before breakfast, and every Wednesday evening after dinner, to perform a service and bring back to the true flock as many of the erring sheep of Cumberly Green as he might be able to catch. Towards the purchase of this iron church Mr. Clavering had at first given a hundred pounds. Sir Hugh, in answer to the fifth application, had very ungraciously, through his steward, bestowed ten pounds. Among the farmers one pound nine and eightpence had been collected. Mr. Saul had given two pounds; Mrs. Clavering gave five pounds; the girls gave ten shillings each; Henry Clavering gave five pounds;—and then the parson made up the remainder. But Mr. Saul had journeyed thrice painfully to Bristol, making the bargain for the church, going and coming each time by third-class, and he had written all the letters; but Mrs. Clavering had paid the postage, and she and the girls between them were making the covering for the little altar.

"What does it matter where it is? He can put it anywhere he wants on the Green. Anyway, I should go to him." So Mr. Clavering went. Cumberly Green was a small village in the parish of Clavering, three miles away from the church, where the locals had developed a bad habit of attending a dissenting chapel nearby. Thanks to Mr. Saul's efforts, but mostly from Mr. Clavering's wallet, an iron chapel had been bought for one hundred and fifty pounds. Mr. Saul planned to take on the enjoyable task of walking to Cumberly Green every Sunday morning before breakfast and every Wednesday evening after dinner, to conduct a service and bring back as many of the lost sheep of Cumberly Green as he could manage. Initially, Mr. Clavering contributed one hundred pounds towards the purchase of this iron church. Sir Hugh, after being asked five times, begrudgingly donated ten pounds through his steward. Among the farmers, one pound nine and eightpence was collected. Mr. Saul donated two pounds; Mrs. Clavering contributed five pounds; the girls each gave ten shillings; Henry Clavering gave five pounds—then the parson covered the rest. However, Mr. Saul had endured three exhausting trips to Bristol to secure the deal for the church, traveling back and forth each time in third-class, and he had written all the letters; but Mrs. Clavering paid for the postage, and she and the girls were working together to make the covering for the little altar.

"Is it all settled, Harry?" said Fanny, stopping with her brother, and hanging over his chair. She was a pretty, gay-spirited girl, with bright eyes and dark brown hair, which fell in two curls behind her ears.

"Is everything all set, Harry?" asked Fanny, pausing with her brother and leaning over his chair. She was a pretty, cheerful girl, with bright eyes and dark brown hair that curled down behind her ears.

"He has said nothing to unsettle it."

"He hasn't said anything to disturb it."

"I know it makes him very unhappy."

"I know it makes him really unhappy."

"No, Fanny, not very unhappy. He would rather that I should go into the church, but that is about all."

"No, Fanny, not very unhappy. He would prefer that I go into the church, but that's about it."

"I think you are quite right."

"I think you’re totally right."

"And Mary thinks I am quite wrong."

"And Mary thinks I'm completely wrong."

"Mary thinks so, of course. So should I too, perhaps, if I were engaged to a clergyman. That's the old story of the fox who had lost his tail."

"Mary thinks so, of course. I should probably think the same way if I were engaged to a clergyman. That’s the classic tale of the fox who lost his tail."

"And your tail isn't gone yet?"

"And your tail is still there?"

"No, my tail isn't gone yet. Mary thinks that no life is like a clergyman's life. But, Harry, though mamma hasn't said so, I'm sure she thinks you are right. She won't say so as long as it may seem to interfere with anything papa may choose to say; but I'm sure she's glad in her heart."

"No, my tail isn't gone yet. Mary believes that nothing compares to a clergyman's life. But, Harry, even though Mom hasn't said it, I'm sure she thinks you're right. She won't admit it as long as it might clash with something Dad might say; but I'm certain she's happy about it deep down."

"And I am glad in my heart, Fanny. And as I'm the person most concerned, I suppose that's the most material thing." Then they followed their father into the drawing-room.

"And I'm happy in my heart, Fanny. And since I'm the one most affected, I guess that’s the most important thing." Then they followed their father into the living room.

"Couldn't you drive Mrs. Clavering over in the pony chair, and settle it between you," said Mr. Clavering to his curate. Mr. Saul looked disappointed. In the first place, he hated driving the pony, which was a rapid-footed little beast, that had a will of his own; and in the next place, he thought the rector ought to visit the spot on such an occasion. "Or Mrs. Clavering will drive you," said the rector, remembering Mr. Saul's objection to the pony. Still Mr. Saul looked unhappy. Mr. Saul was very tall and very thin, with a tall thin head, and weak eyes, and a sharp, well-cut nose, and, so to say, no lips, and very white teeth, with no beard, and a well-cut chin. His face was so thin that his cheekbones obtruded themselves unpleasantly. He wore a long rusty black coat, and a high rusty black waistcoat, and trousers that were brown with dirty roads and general ill-usage. Nevertheless, it never occurred to any one that Mr. Saul did not look like a gentleman, not even to himself, to whom no ideas whatever on that subject ever presented themselves. But that he was a gentleman I think he knew well enough, and was able to carry himself before Sir Hugh and his wife with quite as much ease as he could do in the rectory. Once or twice he had dined at the great house; but Lady Clavering had declared him to be a bore, and Sir Hugh had called him "that most offensive of all animals, a clerical prig." It had therefore been decided that he was not to be asked to the great house any more. It may be as well to state here, as elsewhere, that Mr. Clavering very rarely went to his nephew's table. On certain occasions he did do so, so that there might be no recognized quarrel between him and Sir Hugh; but such visits were few and far between.

"Couldn’t you take Mrs. Clavering over in the pony cart and sort it out between you?" Mr. Clavering said to his curate. Mr. Saul looked let down. First of all, he hated driving the pony, which was a fast little creature that had a mind of its own; and secondly, he thought the rector should visit the place on such an occasion. "Or Mrs. Clavering can drive you," the rector suggested, remembering Mr. Saul's dislike of the pony. Still, Mr. Saul looked unsatisfied. Mr. Saul was very tall and thin, with a long, narrow head, weak eyes, a sharp, well-defined nose, and, to put it simply, no lips, and very white teeth, with no beard, and a well-defined chin. His face was so thin that his cheekbones stood out uncomfortably. He wore a long, worn black coat, a high, worn black waistcoat, and trousers that were stained brown from dirty roads and general neglect. Yet, it never crossed anyone's mind that Mr. Saul didn’t look like a gentleman, not even his own. He never thought about it either. But he knew well enough that he was a gentleman and could carry himself in front of Sir Hugh and his wife just as comfortably as he did in the rectory. He had dined at the big house once or twice, but Lady Clavering had called him a bore, and Sir Hugh had branded him "that most annoying of all creatures, a clerical prig." Consequently, it was decided that he wouldn’t be invited to the big house anymore. It’s worth mentioning here, as elsewhere, that Mr. Clavering very rarely dined at his nephew's table. On certain occasions, he did so to avoid any obvious conflict between him and Sir Hugh, but those visits were few and far between.

After a few more words from Mr. Saul, and a glance from his wife's eye, Mr. Clavering consented to go to Cumberly Green, though there was nothing he liked so little as a morning spent with his curate. When he had started, Harry told his mother also of his final decision. "I shall go to Stratton to-morrow and settle it all."

After a few more comments from Mr. Saul and a look from his wife, Mr. Clavering agreed to go to Cumberly Green, even though he disliked spending a morning with his curate. Once he was on his way, Harry informed his mother of his final decision. "I'm going to Stratton tomorrow to sort everything out."

"And what does papa say?" asked the mother.

"And what does dad say?" asked the mother.

"Just what he has said before. It is not so much that he wishes me to be a clergyman, as that he does not wish me to have lost all my time up to this."

"Just what he said before. It's not so much that he wants me to become a clergyman, but rather that he doesn't want me to feel like I've wasted all my time up to now."

"It is more than that, I think, Harry," said his elder sister, a tall girl, less pretty than her sister, apparently less careful of her prettiness, very quiet, or, as some said, demure, but known to be good as gold by all who knew her well.

"It’s more than just that, I think, Harry," said his older sister, a tall girl who wasn't as pretty as her sister and seemed less concerned about her looks. She was very quiet, or as some described her, demure, but everyone who really knew her recognized that she was as good as gold.

"I doubt it," said Harry, stoutly. "But, however that may be, a man must choose for himself."

"I doubt it," Harry said firmly. "But regardless of that, a man has to make his own choices."

"We all thought you had chosen," said Mary.

"We all thought you had made a choice," said Mary.

"If it is settled," said the mother, "I suppose we shall do no good by opposing it."

"If it’s decided," the mother said, "I guess we won’t achieve anything by resisting it."

"Would you wish to oppose it, mamma?" said Harry.

"Would you like to oppose it, Mom?" said Harry.

"No, my dear. I think you should judge for yourself."

"No, my dear. I believe you should decide for yourself."

"You see I could have no scope in the church for that sort of ambition which would satisfy me. Look at such men as Locke, and Stephenson, and Brassey. They are the men who seem to me to do most in the world. They were all self-educated, but surely a man can't have a worse chance because he has learned something. Look at old Beilby with a seat in Parliament, and a property worth two or three hundred thousand pounds! When he was my age he had nothing but his weekly wages."

"You see, I couldn't find any opportunity in the church for the kind of ambition that would satisfy me. Look at guys like Locke, Stephenson, and Brassey. They’re the ones who really make an impact in the world. They were all self-taught, but surely a person shouldn’t have a worse chance just because they've learned something. Look at old Beilby with a seat in Parliament and a property worth two or three hundred thousand pounds! When he was my age, he had nothing but his weekly paycheck."

"I don't know whether Mr. Beilby is a very happy man or a very good man," said Mary.

"I’m not sure if Mr. Beilby is a really happy guy or a really good one," said Mary.

"I don't know, either," said Harry; "but I do know that he has thrown a single arch over a wider span of water than ever was done before, and that ought to make him happy." After saying this in a tone of high authority, befitting his dignity as a fellow of his college, Harry Clavering went out, leaving his mother and sisters to discuss the subject which to two of them was all-important. As to Mary, she had hopes of her own, vested in the clerical concerns of a neighbouring parish.

"I don’t know either," said Harry, "but I do know that he has built a single arch over a bigger span of water than anyone ever has before, and that should make him happy." After saying this in a tone of confidence, suitable for his status as a college fellow, Harry Clavering left, leaving his mom and sisters to discuss the topic that was crucial for two of them. As for Mary, she had her own hopes tied to the church matters of a nearby parish.

 

 

CHAPTER III.

LORD ONGAR.

On the next morning Harry Clavering rode over to Stratton, thinking much of his misery as he went. It was all very well for him, in the presence of his own family to talk of his profession as the one subject which was to him of any importance; but he knew very well himself that he was only beguiling them in doing so. This question of a profession was, after all, but dead leaves to him,—to him who had a canker at his heart, a perpetual thorn in his bosom, a misery within him which no profession could mitigate! Those dear ones at home guessed nothing of this, and he would take care that they should guess nothing. Why should they have the pain of knowing that he had been made wretched for ever by blighted hopes? His mother, indeed, had suspected something in those sweet days of his roaming with Julia through the park. She had once or twice said a word to warn him. But of the very truth of his deep love,—so he told himself,—she had been happily ignorant. Let her be ignorant. Why should he make his mother unhappy? As these thoughts passed through his mind, I think that he revelled in his wretchedness, and made much to himself of his misery. He sucked in his sorrow greedily, and was somewhat proud to have had occasion to break his heart. But not the less, because he was thus early blighted, would he struggle for success in the world. He would show her that, as his wife, she might have had a worthier position than Lord Ongar could give her. He, too, might probably rise the quicker in the world, as now he would have no impediment of wife or family. Then, as he rode along, he composed a sonnet, fitting to his case, the strength and rhythm of which seemed to him, as he sat on horseback, to be almost perfect. Unfortunately, when he was back at Clavering, and sat in his room with the pen in his hand, the turn of the words had escaped him.

The next morning, Harry Clavering rode over to Stratton, preoccupied with his misery. It was easy for him to talk about his career as the one thing that mattered when he was with his family, but deep down, he knew he was just putting on a show. The whole idea of a profession was meaningless to him—he had a wound in his heart, a constant pain that no career could ease. His loved ones at home had no idea about this, and he was determined to keep it that way. Why should they suffer knowing he was doomed by lost dreams? His mother had picked up on something during those blissful days he spent wandering the park with Julia. She had occasionally given him some gentle advice. But regarding the truth of his deep love—he told himself—she was blissfully unaware. Let her remain unaware. Why should he make his mother sad? While these thoughts swirled in his mind, he realized that he was almost indulging in his own misery, taking pride in the pain of his broken heart. He absorbed his sorrow eagerly and felt a strange satisfaction in having suffered. Yet, despite being so early wounded, he was determined to succeed in the world. He wanted to prove to her that, as his wife, she could have had a better life than what Lord Ongar could offer. Plus, he expected he would rise faster in his career now that he wouldn't have the burden of a wife or children. As he rode along, he even crafted a sonnet that seemed nearly perfect in its strength and rhythm. Unfortunately, when he returned to Clavering and sat in his room with a pen in hand, the flow of words slipped from his mind.

He found Mr. Burton at home, and was not long in concluding his business. Messrs. Beilby and Burton were not only civil engineers, but were land surveyors also, and land valuers on a great scale. They were employed much by Government upon public buildings, and if not architects themselves, were supposed to know all that architects should do and should not do. In the purchase of great properties Mr. Burton's opinion was supposed to be, or to have been, as good as any in the kingdom, and therefore there was very much to be learned in the office at Stratton. But Mr. Burton was not a rich man like his partner, Mr. Beilby, nor an ambitious man. He had never soared Parliamentwards, had never speculated, had never invented, and never been great. He had been the father of a very large family, all of whom were doing as well in the world, and some of them perhaps better, than their father. Indeed, there were many who said that Mr. Burton would have been a richer man if he had not joined himself in partnership with Mr. Beilby. Mr. Beilby had the reputation of swallowing more than his share wherever he went.

He found Mr. Burton at home and quickly wrapped up his business. Messrs. Beilby and Burton were not only civil engineers but also land surveyors and land valuers on a large scale. They were frequently hired by the government for public buildings, and while they might not have been architects themselves, they were expected to know everything about what architects should and shouldn’t do. When it came to purchasing significant properties, Mr. Burton's opinion was considered as good as any in the country, so there was a lot to learn at the office in Stratton. However, Mr. Burton wasn’t as wealthy as his partner, Mr. Beilby, nor was he particularly ambitious. He had never aimed for a seat in Parliament, never speculated, never invented, and never achieved great fame. He had a very large family, all of whom were doing quite well in life, and some perhaps even better than their father. In fact, many said that Mr. Burton would have been richer if he hadn’t partnered with Mr. Beilby, who had a reputation for taking more than his fair share wherever he went.

When the business part of the arrangement was finished Mr. Burton talked to his future pupil about lodgings, and went out with him into the town to look for rooms. The old man found that Harry Clavering was rather nice in this respect, and in his own mind formed an idea that this new beginner might have been a more auspicious pupil, had he not already become a fellow of a college. Indeed, Harry talked to him quite as though they two were on an equality together; and, before they had parted, Mr. Burton was not sure that Harry did not patronize him. He asked the young man, however, to join them at their early dinner, and then introduced him to Mrs. Burton, and to their youngest daughter, the only child who was still living with them. "All my other girls are married, Mr. Clavering; and all of them married to men connected with my own profession." The colour came slightly to Florence Burton's cheeks as she heard her father's words, and Harry asked himself whether the old man expected that he should go through the same ordeal; but Mr. Burton himself was quite unaware that he had said anything wrong, and then went on to speak of the successes of his sons. "But they began early, Mr. Clavering; and worked hard,—very hard indeed." He was a good, kindly, garrulous old man; but Harry began to doubt whether he would learn much at Stratton. It was, however, too late to think of that now, and everything was fixed.

Once the business side of things was settled, Mr. Burton talked to his future pupil about finding a place to stay and took him into town to search for rooms. The old man thought Harry Clavering was quite nice in this regard and secretly believed that this new student could have been a more promising pupil had he not already become a fellow of a college. In fact, Harry spoke to him as if they were equals, and by the time they parted ways, Mr. Burton wasn’t sure if Harry was looking down on him. However, he invited the young man to join them for their early dinner and introduced him to Mrs. Burton and their youngest daughter, the only child still living at home. "All my other girls are married, Mr. Clavering, and they've all married men connected with my own profession." Florence Burton felt a slight flush come to her cheeks upon hearing her father's words, and Harry wondered whether the old man expected him to go through the same experience. Yet, Mr. Burton remained completely unaware that he had said anything inappropriate and continued talking about his sons' achievements. "But they started early, Mr. Clavering, and worked hard—very hard, indeed." He was a good-hearted, chatty old man, but Harry began to question whether he would learn much at Stratton. However, it was too late to think about that now, as everything was already settled.

Harry, when he looked at Florence Burton, at once declared to himself that she was plain. Anything more unlike Julia Brabazon never appeared in the guise of a young lady. Julia was tall, with a high brow, a glorious complexion, a nose as finely modelled as though a Grecian sculptor had cut it, a small mouth, but lovely in its curves, and a chin that finished and made perfect the symmetry of her face. Her neck was long, but graceful as a swan's, her bust was full, and her whole figure like that of a goddess. Added to this, when he had first known her, had been all the charm of youth. When she had returned to Clavering the other day, the affianced bride of Lord Ongar, he had hardly known whether to admire or to deplore the settled air of established womanhood which she had assumed. Her large eyes had always lacked something of rapid glancing sparkling brightness. They had been glorious eyes to him, and in those early days he had not known that they lacked aught; but he had perceived, or perhaps fancied, that now, in her present condition, they were often cold, and sometimes almost cruel. Nevertheless he was ready to swear that she was perfect in her beauty.

Harry, when he looked at Florence Burton, immediately concluded that she was plain. There was nothing about her that resembled Julia Brabazon. Julia was tall, with a high forehead, a beautiful complexion, a nose so finely shaped it seemed like it was carved by a Greek sculptor, a small mouth that was lovely in its curves, and a chin that completed the symmetry of her face. Her neck was long but graceful like a swan's, her bust was full, and her entire figure resembled that of a goddess. Plus, when he first met her, she had all the charm of youth. When she returned to Clavering recently, engaged to Lord Ongar, he was unsure whether to admire or regret the poised air of established womanhood she now displayed. Her large eyes had always been somewhat lacking in quick, sparkling brightness. They had been beautiful eyes to him, and in those early days, he hadn’t realized they were lacking anything; however, he had noticed, or perhaps imagined, that now, in her current state, they seemed cold and sometimes almost cruel. Still, he was willing to swear she was perfect in her beauty.

Poor Florence Burton was short of stature, was brown, meagre, and poor-looking. So said Harry Clavering to himself. Her small hand, though soft, lacked that wondrous charm of touch which Julia's possessed. Her face was short, and her forehead, though it was broad and open, had none of that feminine command which Julia's look conveyed. That Florence's eyes were very bright,—bright and soft as well, he allowed; and her dark brown hair was very glossy; but she was, on the whole, a mean-looking little thing. He could not, as he said to himself on his return home, avoid the comparison, as she was the first girl he had seen since he had parted from Julia Brabazon.

Poor Florence Burton was short, brown, skinny, and didn’t look very good. That’s what Harry Clavering thought to himself. Her small hand, while soft, didn’t have the amazing charm of touch that Julia’s had. Her face was small, and although her forehead was broad and open, it didn’t have the feminine authority that Julia’s look had. He admitted that Florence’s eyes were very bright—bright and soft too—and her dark brown hair was shiny; but overall, she looked rather unimpressive. He couldn’t help but compare her, he told himself on his way home, since she was the first girl he had seen since parting ways with Julia Brabazon.

"I hope you'll find yourself comfortable at Stratton, sir," said old Mrs. Burton.

"I hope you feel comfortable at Stratton, sir," said old Mrs. Burton.

"Thank you," said Harry, "but I want very little myself in that way. Anything does for me."

"Thanks," Harry said, "but I don't really want much for myself in that regard. I'm good with anything."

"One young gentleman we had took a bedroom at Mrs. Pott's, and did very nicely without any second room at all. Don't you remember, Mr. B.? it was young Granger."

"One young guy we had took a bedroom at Mrs. Pott's, and managed just fine without any second room at all. Don't you remember, Mr. B.? It was young Granger."

"Young Granger had a very short allowance," said Mr. Burton. "He lived upon fifty pounds a year all the time he was here."

"Young Granger had a very small allowance," said Mr. Burton. "He lived on fifty pounds a year while he was here."

"And I don't think Scarness had more when he began," said Mrs. Burton. "Mr. Scarness married one of my girls, Mr. Clavering, when he started himself at Liverpool. He has pretty nigh all the Liverpool docks under him now. I have heard him say that butcher's meat did not cost him four shillings a week all the time he was here. I've always thought Stratton one of the reasonablest places anywhere for a young man to do for himself in."

"And I don't think Scarness had much more when he started," said Mrs. Burton. "Mr. Scarness married one of my daughters, Mr. Clavering, when he got his start in Liverpool. He pretty much has all the Liverpool docks working under him now. I've heard him say that he didn't spend more than four shillings a week on meat while he was here. I've always thought Stratton is one of the best places for a young man to make it on his own."

"I don't know, my dear," said the husband, "that Mr. Clavering will care very much for that."

"I don't know, my dear," said the husband, "if Mr. Clavering will care much about that."

"Perhaps not, Mr. B.; but I do like to see young men careful about their spendings. What's the use of spending a shilling when sixpence will do as well; and sixpence saved when a man has nothing but himself, becomes pounds and pounds by the time he has a family about him."

"Maybe not, Mr. B.; but I appreciate seeing young men being careful with their money. What's the point of spending a dollar when you can get by with fifty cents? And that fifty cents saved when a man is on his own adds up to pounds by the time he has a family to think about."

During all this time Miss Burton said little or nothing, and Harry Clavering himself did not say much. He could not express any intention of rivalling Mr. Scarness's economy in the article of butcher's meat, nor could he promise to content himself with Granger's solitary bedroom. But as he rode home he almost began to fear that he had made a mistake. He was not wedded to the joys of his college hall, or the college common room. He did not like the narrowness of college life. But he doubted whether the change from that to the oft-repeated hospitalities of Mrs. Burton might not be too much for him. Scarness's four shillings'-worth of butcher's meat had already made him half sick of his new profession, and though Stratton might be the "reasonablest place anywhere for a young man," he could not look forward to living there for a year with much delight. As for Miss Burton, it might be quite as well that she was plain, as he wished for none of the delights which beauty affords to young men.

During all this time, Miss Burton said little or nothing, and Harry Clavering didn't say much either. He couldn’t express any desire to match Mr. Scarness’s budget when it came to buying meat, nor could he promise to be satisfied with Granger's single bedroom. But as he rode home, he started to worry that he had made a mistake. He wasn't attached to the pleasures of his college hall or the college common room. He didn’t like the limitations of college life. But he began to wonder if moving from that to the repeated hospitality of Mrs. Burton might be too much for him. Scarness’s four shillings’ worth of meat had already made him somewhat sick of his new career, and even though Stratton might be the “most reasonable place around for a young man,” he couldn’t look forward to spending a year there with much excitement. As for Miss Burton, it might actually be for the best that she was plain, since he had no interest in the pleasures that beauty offers to young men.

On his return home, however, he made no complaint of Stratton. He was too strong-willed to own that he had been in any way wrong, and when early in the following week he started for St. Cuthbert's, he was able to speak with cheerful hope of his new prospects. If ultimately he should find life in Stratton to be unendurable, he would cut that part of his career short, and contrive to get up to London at an earlier time than he had intended.

On his way home, though, he didn’t say anything bad about Stratton. He was too stubborn to admit he was in any way at fault, and when he set off for St. Cuthbert’s early the next week, he was able to talk with optimistic excitement about his new opportunities. If he eventually found life in Stratton to be unbearable, he would shorten that chapter of his life and manage to get to London earlier than he had planned.

On the 31st of August Lord Ongar and Sir Hugh Clavering reached Clavering Park, and, as has been already told, a pretty little note was at once sent up to Miss Brabazon in her bedroom. When she met Lord Ongar in the drawing-room, about an hour afterwards, she had instructed herself that it would be best to say nothing of the note; but she could not refrain from a word. "I am much obliged, my lord, by your kindness and generosity," she said, as she gave him her hand. He merely bowed and smiled, and muttered something as to his hoping that he might always find it as easy to gratify her. He was a little man, on whose behalf it certainly appeared that the Peerage must have told a falsehood; it seemed so at least to those who judged of his years from his appearance. The Peerage said that he was thirty-six, and that, no doubt, was in truth his age, but any one would have declared him to be ten years older. This look was produced chiefly by the effect of an elaborately dressed jet black wig which he wore. What misfortune had made him bald so early,—if to be bald early in life be a misfortune,—I cannot say; but he had lost the hair from the crown of his head, and had preferred wiggery to baldness. No doubt an effort was made to hide the wiggishness of his wigs, but what effect in that direction was ever made successfully? He was, moreover, weak, thin, and physically poor, and had, no doubt, increased this weakness and poorness by hard living. Though others thought him old, time had gone swiftly with him, and he still thought himself a young man. He hunted, though he could not ride. He shot, though he could not walk. And, unfortunately, he drank, though he had no capacity for drinking! His friends at last had taught him to believe that his only chance of saving himself lay in marriage, and therefore he had engaged himself to Julia Brabazon, purchasing her at the price of a brilliant settlement. If Lord Ongar should die before her, Ongar Park was to be hers for life, with thousands a year to maintain it. Courton Castle, the great family seat, would of course go to the heir; but Ongar Park was supposed to be the most delightful small country-seat anywhere within thirty miles of London. It lay among the Surrey hills, and all the world had heard of the charms of Ongar Park. If Julia were to survive her lord, Ongar Park was to be hers; and they who saw them both together had but little doubt that she would come to the enjoyment of this clause in her settlement. Lady Clavering had been clever in arranging the match; and Sir Hugh, though he might have been unwilling to give his sister-in-law money out of his own pocket, had performed his duty as a brother-in-law in looking to her future welfare. Julia Brabazon had no doubt that she was doing well. Poor Harry Clavering! She had loved him in the days of her romance. She, too, had written her sonnets. But she had grown old earlier in life than he had done, and had taught herself that romance could not be allowed to a woman in her position. She was highly born, the daughter of a peer, without money, and even without a home to which she had any claim. Of course she had accepted Lord Ongar, but she had not put out her hand to take all these good things without resolving that she would do her duty to her future lord. The duty would be doubtless disagreeable, but she would do it with all the more diligence on that account.

On August 31st, Lord Ongar and Sir Hugh Clavering arrived at Clavering Park, and as was mentioned earlier, a nice little note was immediately sent up to Miss Brabazon in her bedroom. When she encountered Lord Ongar in the drawing room about an hour later, she had prepared herself to mention nothing about the note; however, she couldn’t help but say something. “Thank you so much, my lord, for your kindness and generosity,” she said, extending her hand to him. He just bowed and smiled, mumbling something about hoping it would always be easy to please her. He was a short man, and it certainly seemed like the Peerage must have been mistaken about his age; at least, that’s what anyone judging by his appearance would think. The Peerage stated he was thirty-six, which was probably true, but anyone would have guessed he was at least ten years older. This impression was largely due to the effect of the elaborately styled jet black wig he wore. I can’t say what misfortune made him bald at such a young age—if being bald early is indeed a misfortune—but he had lost the hair from the top of his head and chose to wear a wig instead of going bald. No doubt there was an effort to conceal the wig-like appearance of his hairpieces, but what has ever been successfully done in that regard? He was also frail, thin, and physically weak, likely made worse by a hard lifestyle. Although others perceived him as old, time had passed quickly for him, and he still considered himself a young man. He hunted, even though he couldn’t ride, shot, though he couldn’t walk, and unfortunately drank, despite having no capacity for it! His friends eventually convinced him that his best chance of saving himself lay in marriage, which led him to engage to Julia Brabazon, securing her with a generous settlement. If Lord Ongar were to die before her, Ongar Park would be hers for life, along with thousands a year to maintain it. Courton Castle, the grand family estate, would naturally go to the heir, but Ongar Park was believed to be the most charming small country seat within thirty miles of London. It was situated in the Surrey hills, and everyone knew of the beauty of Ongar Park. If Julia outlived her husband, Ongar Park would be hers; and those who saw them together rarely doubted she would enjoy this aspect of her settlement. Lady Clavering had been smart in arranging the match, and though Sir Hugh might not have been eager to provide his sister-in-law with money from his own pocket, he fulfilled his duty as a brother-in-law by looking out for her future well-being. Julia Brabazon was confident that she was making a smart decision. Poor Harry Clavering! She had loved him in her youthful days. She too had written sonnets. But she had matured earlier in life than he had and learned that a woman in her position couldn’t afford to indulge in romance. She was from a noble family, the daughter of a peer, without money, and without a home to which she had a claim. Naturally, she had accepted Lord Ongar, but she hadn’t extended her hand to grab all the benefits without resolving to fulfill her responsibilities to her future husband. The duty would undoubtedly be unpleasant, but she would undertake it with even greater determination for that reason.

September passed by, hecatombs of partridges were slaughtered, and the day of the wedding drew nigh. It was pretty to see Lord Ongar and the self-satisfaction which he enjoyed at this time. The world was becoming young with him again, and he thought that he rather liked the respectability of his present mode of life. He gave himself but scanty allowances of wine, and no allowance of anything stronger than wine, and did not dislike his temperance. There was about him at all hours an air which seemed to say, "There; I told you all that I could do it as soon as there was any necessity." And in these halcyon days he could shoot for an hour without his pony, and he liked the gentle courteous badinage which was bestowed upon his courtship, and he liked also Julia's beauty. Her conduct to him was perfect. She was never pert, never exigeant, never romantic, and never humble. She never bored him, and yet was always ready to be with him when he wished it. She was never exalted; and yet she bore her high place as became a woman nobly born and acknowledged to be beautiful.

September went by, and a ton of partridges were hunted down, while the wedding day approached. It was nice to see Lord Ongar and the satisfaction he felt during this time. The world seemed to be rejuvenating alongside him, and he actually enjoyed the respectability of his current lifestyle. He treated himself to only a little wine, and nothing stronger, and he didn't mind his moderation. At all times, there was an aura about him that seemed to say, "See? I knew I could do this as soon as it was necessary." During these peaceful days, he could hunt for an hour without his pony, and he appreciated the light-hearted banter surrounding his courtship, as well as Julia's beauty. Her behavior towards him was flawless. She was never rude, never demanding, never overly sentimental, and never submissive. She never bored him, yet was always available when he wanted her company. She didn't act superior; yet, she carried herself with grace, fitting for a woman of noble birth who was recognized for her beauty.

"I declare you have quite made a lover of him," said Lady Clavering to her sister. When a thought of the match had first arisen in Sir Hugh's London house, Lady Clavering had been eager in praise of Lord Ongar, or eager in praise rather of the position which the future Lady Ongar might hold; but since the prize had been secured, since it had become plain that Julia was to be the greater woman of the two, she had harped sometimes on the other string. As a sister she had striven for a sister's welfare, but as a woman she could not keep herself from comparisons which might tend to show that after all, well as Julia was doing, she was not doing better than her elder sister had done. Hermione had married simply a baronet, and not the richest or the most amiable among baronets; but she had married a man suitable in age and wealth, with whom any girl might have been in love. She had not sold herself to be the nurse, or not to be the nurse, as it might turn out, of a worn-out debauché. She would have hinted nothing of this, perhaps have thought nothing of this, had not Julia and Lord Ongar walked together through the Clavering groves as though they were two young people. She owed it as a duty to her sister to point out that Lord Ongar could not be a romantic young person, and ought not to be encouraged to play that part.

"I declare you've really turned him into a lover," said Lady Clavering to her sister. When the idea of the match first came up in Sir Hugh's London house, Lady Clavering was enthusiastic about Lord Ongar, or more precisely about the status the future Lady Ongar would have; but now that the prize was secured, now that it was clear Julia would be the more impressive of the two, she sometimes played a different tune. As a sister, she had worked for her sister's happiness, but as a woman, she couldn't help but make comparisons that suggested, despite Julia's success, she wasn't surpassing what her elder sister had achieved. Hermione had married a plain baronet, and not even the richest or most charming of baronets; but she had married a man who was appropriate in age and wealth, someone any girl could have fallen for. She hadn't compromised herself to become the caretaker, or maybe not even that, of a worn-out libertine. She might not have mentioned any of this, perhaps wouldn’t have thought about it at all, if Julia and Lord Ongar hadn't been walking together in the Clavering groves like two young lovers. She felt it was her duty to point out to her sister that Lord Ongar couldn't be seen as a romantic young man, and shouldn't be encouraged to play that role.

"I don't know that I have made anything of him," answered Julia. "I suppose he's much like other men when they're going to be married." Julia quite understood the ideas that were passing through her sister's mind, and did not feel them to be unnatural.

"I don't think I've really changed him," Julia replied. "I guess he's just like other guys when they're about to get married." Julia fully grasped the thoughts running through her sister's mind and didn't find them unusual.

"What I mean is, that he has come out so strong in the Romeo line, which we hardly expected, you know. We shall have him under your bedroom window with a guitar like Don Giovanni."

"What I mean is, he has come out so strong in the Romeo role, which we hardly expected, you know. We’ll have him under your bedroom window with a guitar like Don Giovanni."

"I hope not, because it's so cold. I don't think it likely, as he seems fond of going to bed early."

"I hope not, because it's really cold. I don't think it's likely since he seems to like going to bed early."

"And it's the best thing for him," said Lady Clavering, becoming serious and carefully benevolent. "It's quite a wonder what good hours and quiet living have done for him in so short a time. I was observing him as he walked yesterday, and he put his feet to the ground as firmly almost as Hugh does."

"And it's the best thing for him," said Lady Clavering, becoming serious and genuinely caring. "It's amazing what good routines and a peaceful life have done for him in such a short time. I noticed him walking yesterday, and he stepped on the ground almost as firmly as Hugh does."

"Did he indeed? I hope he won't have the habit of putting his hand down firmly as Hugh does sometimes."

"Did he really? I hope he won’t have the habit of putting his hand down hard like Hugh does sometimes."

"As for that," said Lady Clavering, with a little tremor, "I don't think there's much difference between them. They all say that when Lord Ongar means a thing he does mean it."

"As for that," said Lady Clavering, with a slight tremor, "I don't think there's much difference between them. They all say that when Lord Ongar means something, he really means it."

"I think a man ought to have a way of his own."

"I believe a man should have his own path."

"And a woman also, don't you, my dear? But, as I was saying, if Lord Ongar will continue to take care of himself he may become quite a different man. Hugh says that he drinks next to nothing now, and though he sometimes lights a cigar in the smoking-room at night, he hardly ever smokes it. You must do what you can to keep him from tobacco. I happen to know that Sir Charles Poddy said that so many cigars were worse for him even than brandy."

"And a woman too, right, my dear? Anyway, like I was saying, if Lord Ongar keeps looking after himself, he could turn into a completely different person. Hugh mentioned that he barely drinks anymore, and while he occasionally lights a cigar in the smoking room at night, he hardly ever smokes it. You should do whatever you can to keep him away from tobacco. I know for a fact that Sir Charles Poddy said that smoking too many cigars is even worse for him than drinking brandy."

All this Julia bore with an even temper. She was determined to bear everything till her time should come. Indeed she had made herself understand that the hearing of such things as these was a part of the price which she was to be called upon to pay. It was not pleasant for her to hear what Sir Charles Poddy had said about the tobacco and brandy of the man she was just going to marry. She would sooner have heard of his riding sixty miles a day, or dancing all night, as she might have heard had she been contented to take Harry Clavering. But she had made her selection with her eyes open, and was not disposed to quarrel with her bargain, because that which she had bought was no better than the article which she had known it to be when she was making her purchase. Nor was she even angry with her sister. "I will do the best I can, Hermy; you may be sure of that. But there are some things which it is useless to talk about."

All this Julia handled calmly. She was determined to endure everything until her time came. She had accepted that hearing things like this was part of the price she had to pay. It was uncomfortable for her to listen to what Sir Charles Poddy said about the tobacco and brandy of the man she was about to marry. She would have preferred to hear about him riding sixty miles a day or dancing all night, just like she might have heard if she had been happy to choose Harry Clavering. But she had made her decision with full awareness and wasn't about to complain about her choice, knowing that what she had picked was exactly what she understood it to be when she made her decision. She wasn't even angry with her sister. "I'll do my best, Hermy; you can count on that. But there are some things that are pointless to discuss."

"But it was as well you should know what Sir Charles said."

"But you should know what Sir Charles said."

"I know quite enough of what he says, Hermy,—quite as much, I daresay, as you do. But, never mind. If Lord Ongar has given up smoking, I quite agree with you that it's a good thing. I wish they'd all give it up, for I hate the smell of it. Hugh has got worse and worse. He never cares about changing his clothes now."

"I know exactly what he's saying, Hermy—probably just as much as you do. But it doesn't matter. If Lord Ongar has stopped smoking, I totally agree that it's for the best. I wish everyone would quit because I can't stand the smell. Hugh has gotten worse and worse. He never bothers to change his clothes anymore."

"I'll tell you what it is," said Sir Hugh to his wife that night; "sixty thousand a year is a very fine income, but Julia will find she has caught a Tartar."

"I'll tell you what it is," said Sir Hugh to his wife that night; "sixty thousand a year is a great income, but Julia will realize she's made a big mistake."

"I suppose he'll hardly live long; will he?"

"I guess he probably won't live much longer, will he?"

"I don't know or care when he lives or when he dies; but, by heaven, he is the most overbearing fellow I ever had in the house with me. I wouldn't stand him here for another fortnight,—not even to make her all safe."

"I don't know or care when he lives or when he dies; but, honestly, he is the most annoying person I've ever had in my house. I wouldn't put up with him here for another two weeks—not even to make her completely safe."

"It will soon be over. They'll be gone on Thursday."

"It'll be over soon. They'll be leaving on Thursday."

"What do you think of his having the impudence to tell Cunliffe,"—Cunliffe was the head keeper,—"before my face, that he didn't know anything about pheasants! 'Well, my lord, I think we've got a few about the place,' said Cunliffe. 'Very few,' said Ongar, with a sneer. Now, if I haven't a better head of game here than he has at Courton, I'll eat him. But the impudence of his saying that before me!"

"What do you think of him having the audacity to tell Cunliffe,"—Cunliffe was the head keeper,—"to my face that he didn’t know anything about pheasants! 'Well, my lord, I think we’ve got a few around here,' said Cunliffe. 'Very few,' said Ongar with a sneer. Now, if I don’t have a better stock of game here than he does at Courton, I’ll eat my words. But the nerve of him saying that in front of me!"

"Did you make him any answer?"

"Did you respond to him?"

"'There's about enough to suit me,' I said. Then he skulked away, knocked off his pins. I shouldn't like to be his wife; I can tell Julia that."

"'There's just enough to satisfy me,' I said. Then he slinked away, losing his balance. I wouldn't want to be his wife; I can tell Julia that."

"Julia is very clever," said the sister.

"Julia is really smart," said the sister.

The day of the marriage came, and everything at Clavering was done with much splendour. Four bridesmaids came down from London on the preceding day; two were already staying in the house, and the two cousins came as two more from the rectory. Julia Brabazon had never been really intimate with Mary and Fanny Clavering, but she had known them well enough to make it odd if she did not ask them to come to her wedding and to take a part in the ceremony. And, moreover, she had thought of Harry and her little romance of other days. Harry, perhaps, might be glad to know that she had shown this courtesy to his sisters. Harry, she knew, would be away at his school. Though she had asked him whether he meant to come to her wedding, she had been better pleased that he should be absent. She had not many regrets herself, but it pleased her to think that he should have them. So Mary and Fanny Clavering were asked to attend her at the altar. Mary and Fanny would both have preferred to decline, but their mother had told them that they could not do so. "It would make ill-feeling," said Mrs. Clavering; "and that is what your papa particularly wishes to avoid."

The day of the wedding arrived, and everything at Clavering was done with great elegance. Four bridesmaids came down from London on the day before; two were already staying at the house, and the two cousins came as the other two from the rectory. Julia Brabazon hadn't been really close with Mary and Fanny Clavering, but she knew them well enough to make it awkward if she didn’t invite them to her wedding and have them participate in the ceremony. Plus, she had thought about Harry and their little romance from the past. Harry might appreciate that she had shown this courtesy to his sisters. She knew Harry would be away at school. Although she had asked him if he planned to come to her wedding, she was actually happier that he would be absent. She didn’t have many regrets herself, but the thought that he might have some pleased her. So, Mary and Fanny Clavering were invited to support her at the altar. Both Mary and Fanny would have preferred to decline, but their mother told them they could not do that. "It would create bad feelings," said Mrs. Clavering; "and that’s what your dad especially wants to avoid."

"When you say papa particularly wishes anything, mamma, you always mean that you wish it particularly yourself," said Fanny. "But if it must be done, it must; and then I shall know how to behave when Mary's time comes."

"When you say dad really wants something, mom, you always mean that you really want it yourself," Fanny said. "But if it has to be done, it has to be; and then I'll know how to act when it's Mary's turn."

The bells were rung lustily all the morning, and all the parish was there, round about the church, to see. There was no record of a lord ever having been married in Clavering church before; and now this lord was going to marry my lady's sister. It was all one as though she were a Clavering herself. But there was no ecstatic joy in the parish. There were to be no bonfires, and no eating and drinking at Sir Hugh's expense,—no comforts provided for any of the poor by Lady Clavering on that special occasion. Indeed, there was never much of such kindnesses between the lord of the soil and his dependants. A certain stipulated dole was given at Christmas for coals and blankets; but even for that there was generally some wrangle between the rector and the steward. "If there's to be all this row about it," the rector had said to the steward, "I'll never ask for it again." "I wish my uncle would only be as good as his word," Sir Hugh had said, when the rector's speech was repeated to him. Therefore, there was not much of real rejoicing in the parish on this occasion, though the bells were rung loudly, and though the people, young and old, did cluster round the churchyard to see the lord lead his bride out of the church. "A puir feckless thing, tottering along like,—not half the makings of a man. A stout lass like she could a'most blow him away wi' a puff of her mouth." That was the verdict which an old farmer's wife passed upon him, and that verdict was made good by the general opinion of the parish.

The bells were rung enthusiastically all morning, and everyone from the parish gathered around the church to watch. There was no record of a lord ever getting married in Clavering church before; now this lord was set to marry my lady's sister. She was essentially seen as a Clavering herself. However, there wasn't any real joy in the parish. There would be no bonfires, no food and drinks paid for by Sir Hugh, and no kindness extended to the poor by Lady Clavering for this occasion. In fact, there was rarely much generosity between the landowner and his tenants. A specific amount was given at Christmas for coal and blankets, but even for that, there was often some squabbling between the rector and the steward. "If there's going to be all this fuss, I'll never ask for it again," the rector told the steward. "I wish my uncle would just keep his word," Sir Hugh said when he heard what the rector had said. So, there wasn't much true celebration in the parish this time, even though the bells rang loudly and people of all ages gathered to see the lord escort his bride out of the church. "A poor, helpless thing, stumbling along like—he's not half the man he should be. A strong girl like her could almost blow him away with a puff of her breath." That’s what an old farmer's wife said about him, and that opinion was echoed by the general feelings in the parish.

"A puir feckless thing, tottering along like,—"
"A poor, helpless thing, stumbling along like,—"
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

But though the lord might be only half a man, Julia Brabazon walked out from the church every inch a countess. Whatever price she might have paid, she had at any rate got the thing which she had intended to buy. And as she stepped into the chariot which carried her away to the railway station on her way to Dover, she told herself that she had done right. She had chosen her profession, as Harry Clavering had chosen his; and having so far succeeded, she would do her best to make her success perfect. Mercenary! Of course she had been mercenary. Were not all men and women mercenary upon whom devolved the necessity of earning their bread?

But even if the lord was only half a man, Julia Brabazon walked out of the church every bit a countess. Whatever cost she had paid, she had at least gotten what she set out to buy. And as she stepped into the carriage that took her to the train station on her way to Dover, she told herself that she had made the right choice. She had chosen her path, just like Harry Clavering had chosen his; and having succeeded so far, she was determined to make her success complete. Mercenary! Of course she had been mercenary. Aren't all men and women mercenary when they have to earn their living?

Then there was a great breakfast at the park,—for the quality,—and the rector on this occasion submitted himself to become the guest of the nephew whom he thoroughly disliked.

Then there was an amazing breakfast at the park—for the quality—and the rector, on this occasion, allowed himself to be the guest of his nephew, whom he really disliked.

 

 

CHAPTER IV.

FLORENCE BURTON.

It was now Christmas time at Stratton, or rather Christmas time was near at hand; not the Christmas next after the autumn of Lord Ongar's marriage, but the following Christmas, and Harry Clavering had finished his studies in Mr. Burton's office. He flattered himself that he had not been idle while he was there, and was now about to commence his more advanced stage of pupilage, under the great Mr. Beilby in London, with hopes which were still good, if they were not so magnificent as they once had been. When he first saw Mr. Burton in his office, and beheld the dusty pigeon-holes with dusty papers, and caught the first glimpse of things as they really were in the workshop of that man of business, he had, to say the truth, been disgusted. And Mrs. Burton's early dinner, and Florence Burton's "plain face" and plain ways, had disconcerted him. On that day he had repented of his intention with regard to Stratton; but he had carried out his purpose like a man, and now he rejoiced greatly that he had done so. He rejoiced greatly, though his hopes were somewhat sobered, and his views of life less grand than they had been. He was to start for Clavering early on the following morning, intending to spend his Christmas at home, and we will see him and listen to him as he bade farewell to one of the members of Mr. Burton's family.

IIt was now Christmas time at Stratton, or rather, Christmas was just around the corner; not the Christmas right after Lord Ongar's marriage that fall, but the next one. Harry Clavering had finished his studies in Mr. Burton's office. He felt proud of himself for not being idle during his time there and was about to start a more advanced stage of his apprenticeship under the notable Mr. Beilby in London, holding onto hopes that were still good, even if not as grand as they once had been. When he first stepped into Mr. Burton's office and saw the dusty pigeonholes filled with dusty papers, he had been, to be honest, quite put off. Mrs. Burton's early dinners and Florence Burton's "plain face" and simple ways had unsettled him. That day, he regretted his decision about Stratton; but he stuck to his plan like a man and now felt very glad that he had. He was glad, even though his hopes were a bit more realistic and his outlook on life less grand than before. He was set to leave for Clavering early the next morning, planning to spend Christmas at home, and we will join him as he says goodbye to one of Mr. Burton's family members.

He was sitting in a small back parlour in Mr. Burton's house, and on the table of the room there was burning a single candle. It was a dull, dingy, brown room, furnished with horsehair-covered chairs, an old horsehair sofa, and heavy rusty curtains. I don't know that there was in the room any attempt at ornament, as certainly there was no evidence of wealth. It was now about seven o'clock in the evening, and tea was over in Mrs. Burton's establishment. Harry Clavering had had his tea, and had eaten his hot muffin, at the further side from the fire of the family table, while Florence had poured out the tea, and Mrs. Burton had sat by the fire on one side with a handkerchief over her lap, and Mr. Burton had been comfortable with his arm-chair and his slippers on the other side. When tea was over, Harry had made his parting speech to Mrs. Burton, and that lady had kissed him, and bade God bless him. "I'll see you for a moment before you go, in my office, Harry," Mr. Burton had said. Then Harry had gone downstairs, and some one else had gone boldly with him, and they two were sitting together in the dingy brown room. After that I need hardly tell my reader what had become of Harry Clavering's perpetual life-enduring heart's misery.

He was sitting in a small back room in Mr. Burton's house, and on the table there was a single candle burning. It was a dull, dreary brown room, furnished with horsehair chairs, an old horsehair sofa, and heavy, worn curtains. I don’t think there was any attempt at decoration, and there certainly wasn’t any sign of wealth. It was around seven o'clock in the evening, and tea was finished in Mrs. Burton's home. Harry Clavering had his tea and enjoyed a hot muffin at the far end of the family table, away from the fire, while Florence poured the tea, and Mrs. Burton sat by the fire with a handkerchief over her lap, and Mr. Burton was comfortable in his armchair and slippers on the other side. Once tea was over, Harry said his goodbyes to Mrs. Burton, who kissed him and wished him well. "I'll see you for a moment before you go, in my office, Harry," Mr. Burton said. Then Harry went downstairs, and someone else boldly followed him, and the two were sitting together in the dingy brown room. After that, I hardly need to explain what happened to Harry Clavering's constant heartache.

He and Florence were sitting on the old horsehair sofa, and Florence's hand was in his. "My darling," he said, "how am I to live for the next two years?"

He and Florence were sitting on the old horsehair sofa, and Florence's hand was in his. "My darling," he said, "how am I going to get through the next two years?"

"You mean five years, Harry."

"You mean five years, Harry."

"No; I mean two,—that is two, unless I can make the time less. I believe you'd be better pleased to think it was ten."

"No; I mean two—two, unless I can make the time shorter. I think you'd prefer to believe it was ten."

"Much better pleased to think it was ten than to have no such hope at all. Of course we shall see each other. It's not as though you were going to New Zealand."

"Much happier to think it was ten than to have no hope at all. Of course, we’ll see each other. It’s not like you’re going to New Zealand."

"I almost wish I were. One would agree then as to the necessity of this cursed delay."

"I almost wish I were. Then we would all agree about how necessary this ridiculous delay is."

"Harry, Harry!"

"Harry, Harry!"

"It is accursed. The prudence of the world in these latter days seems to me to be more abominable than all its other iniquities."

"It is cursed. The wisdom of the world these days seems worse to me than all its other wrongdoings."

"But, Harry, we should have no income."

"But, Harry, we shouldn't have any income."

"Income is a word that I hate."

"Income is a word that I really dislike."

"Now you are getting on to your high horse, and you know I always go out of the way when you begin to prance on that beast. As for me, I don't want to leave papa's house where I'm sure of my bread and butter, till I'm sure of it in another."

"Now you're getting on your high horse, and you know I always go out of my way when you start showing off on that thing. As for me, I don’t want to leave Dad’s house where I know I have food and shelter until I'm sure I have the same somewhere else."

"You say that, Florence, on purpose to torment me."

"You say that, Florence, just to annoy me."

"Dear Harry, do you think I want to torment you on your last night? The truth is, I love you so well that I can afford to be patient for you."

"Dear Harry, do you really think I want to make you suffer on your last night? The truth is, I love you so much that I can be patient for you."

"I hate patience, and always did. Patience is one of the worst vices I know. It's almost as bad as humility. You'll tell me you're 'umble next. If you'll only add that you're contented, you'll describe yourself as one of the lowest of God's creatures."

"I hate being patient, and I always have. Patience is one of the worst habits I know. It's almost as bad as humility. You'll probably tell me you're humble next. If you just add that you're content, you'll picture yourself as one of the lowest of God's creations."

"I don't know about being 'umble, but I am contented. Are not you contented with me, sir?"

"I can't speak for being 'humble,' but I'm happy. Aren't you happy with me, sir?"

"No,—because you're not in a hurry to be married."

"No, because you’re not rushing to get married."

"What a goose you are. Do you know I'm not sure that if you really love a person, and are quite confident about him,—as I am of you,—that having to look forward to being married is not the best part of it all. I suppose you'll like to get my letters now, but I don't know that you'll care for them much when we've been man and wife for ten years."

"What a silly person you are. Do you know I’m not sure that if you really love someone, and are completely sure about them—as I am about you—that looking forward to getting married is the best part of it all. I guess you’ll like getting my letters now, but I don’t think you’ll care about them much after we’ve been married for ten years."

"But one can't live upon letters."

"But you can't live on words."

"I shall expect you to live upon mine, and to grow fat on them. There;—I heard papa's step on the stairs. He said you were to go to him. Good-by, Harry;—dearest Harry! What a blessed wind it was that blew you here."

"I expect you to rely on mine and to thrive because of them. There;—I heard Dad coming up the stairs. He said you should go to him. Goodbye, Harry;—my dear Harry! What a wonderful wind it was that brought you here."

"Stop a moment;—about your getting to Clavering. I shall come for you on Easter-eve."

"Hold on a second; about your trip to Clavering. I'll come to get you on Easter Eve."

"Oh, no;—why should you have so much trouble and expense?"

"Oh, no; why should you go through so much trouble and spend so much?"

"I tell you I shall come for you,—unless, indeed, you decline to travel with me."

"I’m telling you I will come for you—unless, of course, you decide not to travel with me."

"It will be so nice! And then I shall be sure to have you with me the first moment I see them. I shall think it very awful when I first meet your father."

"It'll be so great! And I’ll definitely have you with me the first moment I see them. I’m going to feel really nervous when I meet your dad for the first time."

"He's the most good-natured man, I should say, in England."

"He's the nicest guy, I have to say, in England."

"But he'll think me so plain. You did at first, you know. But he won't be uncivil enough to tell me so, as you did. And Mary is to be married in Easter week? Oh, dear, oh, dear; I shall be so shy among them all."

"But he'll think I'm so plain. You thought so at first, you know. But he won't be rude enough to say it to my face like you did. And Mary is getting married during Easter week? Oh no, I’ll be so awkward around everyone."

"You shy! I never saw you shy in my life. I don't suppose you were ever really put out yet."

"You’re being shy! I’ve never seen you act that way before. I can't imagine you've ever been genuinely upset."

"But I must really put you out, because papa is waiting for you. Dear, dear, dearest Harry. Though I am so patient I shall count the hours till you come for me. Dearest Harry!" Then she bore with him, as he pressed her close to his bosom, and kissed her lips, and her forehead, and her glossy hair. When he was gone she sat down alone for a few minutes on the old sofa, and hugged herself in her happiness. What a happy wind that had been which had blown such a lover as that for her to Stratton!

"But I really need to let you go now because Dad is waiting for you. Dear, dear, sweetest Harry. Even though I’m being patient, I’ll be counting the hours until you come for me. Sweetest Harry!" Then she put up with him as he held her close to his chest and kissed her lips, her forehead, and her shiny hair. After he left, she sat alone for a few minutes on the old sofa, embracing herself in her happiness. What a wonderful stroke of luck it was that brought such a lover to her at Stratton!

"I think he's a good young man," said Mrs. Burton, as soon as she was left with her old husband upstairs.

"I think he's a good young man," said Mrs. Burton, as soon as she was left alone with her elderly husband upstairs.

"Yes, he's a good young man. He means very well."

"Yeah, he's a decent young guy. He has good intentions."

"But he is not idle; is he?"

"But he's not just sitting around, is he?"

"No—no; he's not idle. And he's very clever;—too clever, I'm afraid. But I think he'll do well, though it may take him some time to settle."

"No—no; he's not lazy. And he's really smart;—too smart, I'm afraid. But I think he'll do well, even though it might take him a little time to adjust."

"It seems so natural his taking to Flo; doesn't it? They've all taken one when they went away, and they've all done very well. Deary me; how sad the house will be when Flo has gone."

"It feels so natural for him to take to Flo, doesn't it? They've all had their turn when they left, and they've all done really well. Oh dear; how sad the house will be when Flo is gone."

"Yes,—it'll make a difference that way. But what then? I wouldn't wish to keep one of 'em at home for that reason."

"Yeah, it’ll make a difference that way. But so what? I wouldn’t want to keep any of them at home for that reason."

"No, indeed. I think I'd feel ashamed of myself to have a daughter not married, or not in the way to be married afore she's thirty. I couldn't bear to think that no young man should take a fancy to a girl of mine. But Flo's not twenty yet, and Carry, who was the oldest to go, wasn't four-and-twenty when Scarness took her." Thereupon the old lady put her handkerchief to the corner of her eyes, and wept gently.

"No, definitely not. I think I would feel embarrassed if I had a daughter who wasn't married or at least on the path to getting married before she turned thirty. I couldn't stand the idea that no young man would be interested in my daughter. But Flo isn’t even twenty yet, and Carry, who was the oldest to get married, wasn't even twenty-four when Scarness married her." At that, the old lady wiped her eyes with her handkerchief and cried softly.

"Flo isn't gone yet," said Mr. Burton.

"Flo isn't gone yet," Mr. Burton said.

"But I hope, B., it's not to be a long engagement. I don't like long engagements. It ain't good,—not for the girl; it ain't, indeed."

"But I hope, B., it's not going to be a long engagement. I don't like long engagements. They're not good—definitely not for the girl."

"We were engaged for seven years."

"We were engaged for seven years."

"People weren't so much in a hurry then at anything; but I ain't sure it was very good for me. And though we weren't just married, we were living next door and saw each other. What'll come to Flo if she's to be here and he's to be up in London, pleasuring himself?"

"People weren't really in a rush for anything back then, but I’m not sure it was good for me. And even though we weren’t newlyweds, we lived next door and saw each other. What will happen to Flo if she’s here and he’s up in London, enjoying himself?"

"Flo must bear it as other girls do," said the father, as he got up from his chair.

"Flo has to deal with it like the other girls," said the father, as he got up from his chair.

"I think he's a good young man; I think he is," said the mother. "But don't stand out for too much for 'em to begin upon. What matters? Sure if they were to be a little short you could help 'em." To such a suggestion as this Mr. Burton thought it as well to make no answer, but with ponderous steps descended to his office.

"I think he's a good young man; I really do," said the mother. "But don't stick your neck out for them right away. What does it matter? If they end up needing a little help, you could be there for them." Mr. Burton decided not to respond to such a suggestion and, with heavy steps, headed down to his office.

"Well, Harry," said Mr. Burton, "so you're to be off in the morning?"

"Well, Harry," Mr. Burton said, "so you're leaving in the morning?"

"Yes, sir; I shall breakfast at home to-morrow."

"Yes, sir; I will have breakfast at home tomorrow."

"Ah,—when I was your age I always used to make an early start. Three hours before breakfast never does any hurt. But it shouldn't be more than that. The wind gets into the stomach." Harry had no remark to make on this, and waited, therefore, till Mr. Burton went on. "And you'll be up in London by the 10th of next month?"

"Ah, when I was your age, I always got up early. Waking up three hours before breakfast never hurt anyone. But it shouldn't be more than that. The wind can upset your stomach." Harry had nothing to say to that, so he waited for Mr. Burton to continue. "And you'll be in London by the 10th of next month?"

"Yes, sir; I intend to be at Mr. Beilby's office on the 11th."

"Yeah, I plan to be at Mr. Beilby's office on the 11th."

"That's right. Never lose a day. In losing a day now, you don't lose what you might earn now in a day, but what you might be earning when you're at your best. A young man should always remember that. You can't dispense with a round in the ladder going up. You only make your time at the top so much the shorter."

"That's right. Never waste a day. By wasting a day now, you’re not just missing out on what you could earn today, but also on what you could be earning at your peak. A young person should always keep that in mind. You can't skip a step on the way up. It just makes your time at the top that much shorter."

"I hope you'll find that I'm all right, sir. I don't mean to be idle."

"I hope you think I'm okay, sir. I'm not trying to be lazy."

"Pray don't. Of course, you know, I speak to you very differently from what I should do if you were simply going away from my office. What I shall have to give Florence will be very little,—that is, comparatively little. She shall have a hundred a year, when she marries, till I die; and after my death and her mother's she will share with the others. But a hundred a year will be nothing to you."

"Please don't. You know I'm speaking to you very differently than I would if you were just leaving my office. What I can give Florence will be quite small—relatively speaking. She'll get a hundred a year when she marries, until I die; and after my death and her mother's, she'll share with the others. But a hundred a year won’t mean much to you."

"Won't it, sir? I think a very great deal of a hundred a year. I'm to have a hundred and fifty from the office; and I should be ready to marry on that to-morrow."

"Won't it, sir? I think a lot about a hundred a year. I'm supposed to get a hundred and fifty from the office; and I would be ready to get married on that tomorrow."

"You couldn't live on such an income,—unless you were to alter your habits very much."

"You couldn't survive on that income unless you changed your habits quite a bit."

"But I will alter them."

"But I will change them."

"We shall see. You are so placed that by marrying you would lose a considerable income; and I would advise you to put off thinking of it for the next two years."

"We'll see. You're in a situation where marrying would mean losing a significant income; I suggest you hold off on thinking about it for the next two years."

"My belief is, that settling down would be the best thing in the world to make me work."

"My belief is that settling down would be the best thing in the world to motivate me to work."

"We'll try what a year will do. So Florence is to go to your father's house at Easter?"

"We'll see what a year brings. So Florence is going to your dad's house for Easter?"

"Yes, sir; she has been good enough to promise to come, if you have no objection."

"Yes, sir; she has kindly promised to come, if you don’t mind."

"It is quite as well that they should know her early. I only hope they will like her as well as we like you. Now I'll say good-night,—and good-by." Then Harry went, and walking up and down the High Street of Stratton, thought of all that he had done during the past year.

"It’s probably good for them to meet her soon. I just hope they like her as much as we like you. Now I’ll say goodnight—and goodbye." Then Harry left, and as he walked back and forth along the High Street of Stratton, he reflected on everything he had done in the past year.

On his arrival at Stratton that idea of perpetual misery arising from blighted affection was still strong within his breast. He had given all his heart to a false woman who had betrayed him. He had risked all his fortune on one cast of the die, and, gambler-like, had lost everything. On the day of Julia's marriage he had shut himself up at the school,—luckily it was a holiday,—and had flattered himself that he had gone through some hours of intense agony. No doubt he did suffer somewhat, for in truth he had loved the woman; but such sufferings are seldom perpetual, and with him they had been as easy of cure as with most others. A little more than a year had passed, and now he was already engaged to another woman. As he thought of this he did not by any means accuse himself of inconstancy or of weakness of heart. It appeared to him now the most natural thing in the world that he should love Florence Burton. In those old days he had never seen Florence, and had hardly thought seriously of what qualities a man really wants in a wife. As he walked up and down the hill of Stratton Street with the kiss of the dear, modest, affectionate girl still warm upon his lips, he told himself that a marriage with such a one as Julia Brabazon would have been altogether fatal to his chance of happiness.

On his arrival at Stratton, the feeling of ongoing misery from lost love still weighed heavily on him. He had given his heart to a deceptive woman who had let him down. He had staked everything he had on a single bet, and like a gambler, he had lost it all. On the day of Julia's wedding, he had locked himself away at the school—thankfully, it was a holiday—and had convinced himself he had endured hours of deep pain. He did suffer to some extent, as he truly loved the woman; but such suffering rarely lasts forever, and for him, it had been as easy to overcome as for most. A little over a year had gone by, and now he was already engaged to another woman. As he considered this, he didn’t feel at all guilty about being unfaithful or weak-hearted. It seemed completely natural to him that he should love Florence Burton. Back in those days, he had never met Florence and hadn’t really thought about what qualities a man should look for in a wife. As he paced up and down the hill of Stratton Street, with the kiss of the sweet, modest, affectionate girl still fresh on his lips, he told himself that marrying someone like Julia Brabazon would have been completely detrimental to his chances of happiness.

And things had occurred and rumours had reached him which assisted him much in adopting this view of the subject. It was known to all the Claverings,—and even to all others who cared about such things,—that Lord and Lady Ongar were not happy together, and it had been already said that Lady Ongar had misconducted herself. There was a certain count whose name had come to be mingled with hers in a way that was, to say the least of it, very unfortunate. Sir Hugh Clavering had declared, in Mrs. Clavering's hearing, though but little disposed in general to make many revelations to any of the family at the rectory, "that he did not intend to take his sister-in-law's part. She had made her own bed, and she must lie upon it. She had known what Lord Ongar was before she had married him, and the fault was her own." So much Sir Hugh had said, and, in saying it, had done all that in him lay to damn his sister-in-law's fair fame. Harry Clavering, little as he had lived in the world during the last twelve months, still knew that some people told a different story. The earl too and his wife had not been in England since their marriage;—so that these rumours had been filtered to them at home through a foreign medium. During most of their time they had been in Italy, and now, as Harry knew, they were at Florence. He had heard that Lord Ongar had declared his intention of suing for a divorce; but that he supposed to be erroneous, as the two were still living under the same roof. Then he heard that Lord Ongar was ill; and whispers were spread abroad darkly and doubtingly, as though great misfortunes were apprehended.

And things happened and rumors reached him that helped him a lot in adopting this view of the situation. It was known to all the Claverings—and even to everyone else who cared about such matters—that Lord and Lady Ongar weren’t happy together, and it had already been said that Lady Ongar had behaved improperly. There was a certain count whose name had been linked with hers in a way that was, to say the least, very unfortunate. Sir Hugh Clavering had stated, in Mrs. Clavering's hearing, although generally not inclined to share much with anyone in the family at the rectory, "that he didn’t intend to support his sister-in-law. She made her own choices, and she has to deal with the consequences. She knew who Lord Ongar was before she married him, and the fault is hers." Sir Hugh said this, and in doing so, he did everything he could to tarnish his sister-in-law's reputation. Harry Clavering, although he had lived a sheltered life for the past year, still knew that some people told a different story. The earl and his wife hadn’t been in England since their wedding; so these rumors had filtered down to them at home through foreign sources. For most of their time, they had been in Italy, and now, as Harry knew, they were in Florence. He had heard that Lord Ongar had planned to file for divorce; but he thought that was incorrect, as they were still living under the same roof. Then he heard that Lord Ongar was ill; and rumors circulated ominously and hesitantly, as if great misfortunes were feared.

Harry could not fail to tell himself that had Julia become his wife, as she had once promised, these whispers and this darkness would hardly have come to pass. But not on that account did he now regret that her early vows had not been kept. Living at Stratton, he had taught himself to think much of the quiet domesticities of life, and to believe that Florence Burton was fitter to be his wife than Julia Brabazon. He told himself that he had done well to find this out, and that he had been wise to act upon it. His wisdom had in truth consisted in his capacity to feel that Florence was a nice girl, clever, well-minded, high-principled, and full of spirit,—and in falling in love with her as a consequence. All his regard for the quiet domesticities had come from his love, and had had no share in producing it. Florence was bright-eyed. No eyes were ever brighter, either in tears or in laughter. And when he came to look at her well he found that he had been an idiot to think her plain. "There are things that grow to beauty as you look at them,—to exquisite beauty; and you are one of them," he had said to her. "And there are men," she had answered, "who grow to flattery as you listen to them,—to impudent flattery; and you are one of them." "I thought you plain the first day I saw you. That's not flattery." "Yes, sir, it is; and you mean it for flattery. But after all, Harry, it comes only to this, that you want to tell me that you have learned to love me." He repeated all this to himself as he walked up and down Stratton, and declared to himself that she was very lovely. It had been given to him to ascertain this, and he was rather proud of himself. But he was a little diffident about his father. He thought that, perhaps, his father might see Florence as he himself had first seen her, and might not have discernment enough to ascertain his mistake as he had done. But Florence was not going to Clavering at once, and he would be able to give beforehand his own account of her. He had not been home since his engagement had been a thing settled; but his position with regard to Florence had been declared by letter, and his mother had written to the young lady asking her to come to Clavering.

Harry couldn't help but think that if Julia had become his wife, as she once promised, these whispers and this darkness wouldn’t have happened. Yet he didn’t regret that her early vows had not been kept. Living at Stratton, he had come to appreciate the simple comforts of life and believed that Florence Burton was a better match for him than Julia Brabazon. He told himself he had done well to realize this and had been wise to act on it. His wisdom was really just his ability to see that Florence was a wonderful girl—smart, kind-hearted, principled, and full of life—and that this made him fall in love with her. All his appreciation for the simple comforts came from his love and didn’t contribute to it. Florence had bright eyes. No one had eyes brighter, whether in tears or in laughter. And when he looked at her closely, he realized he had been foolish to think she was plain. "There are things that become beautiful the more you look at them—to exquisite beauty; and you are one of them," he told her. "And there are men," she replied, "who become flatterers the more you listen to them—to shameless flattery; and you are one of them." "I thought you were plain the first day I saw you. That’s not flattery." "Yes, it is; and you mean it as flattery. But really, Harry, it just comes down to you wanting to say that you've learned to love me." He repeated all this to himself as he walked back and forth at Stratton, insisting that she was very lovely. He felt proud to have figured this out. But he was a bit uncertain about his father. He worried that his dad might see Florence the way he first did and might not be able to recognize his change of heart. However, Florence wasn’t going to Clavering right away, so he would have the chance to present his own account of her beforehand. He hadn’t been home since his engagement was settled, but he had informed his parents about Florence in a letter, and his mother had written to Florence inviting her to Clavering.

When Harry got home all the family received him with congratulations. "I am so glad to think that you should marry early," his mother said to him in a whisper. "But I am not married yet, mother," he answered.

When Harry got home, the whole family welcomed him with congratulations. "I'm so happy to hear that you’re thinking about marrying young," his mother said to him in a whisper. "But I’m not married yet, Mom," he replied.

"Do show me a lock of her hair," said Fanny, laughing. "It's twice prettier hair than yours, though she doesn't think half so much about it as you do," said her brother, pinching Fanny's arm. "But you'll show me a lock, won't you?" said Fanny.

"Come on, show me a lock of her hair," said Fanny, laughing. "It’s way prettier than yours, even if she doesn’t care about it as much as you do," her brother replied, pinching Fanny's arm. "But you'll show me a lock, right?" Fanny asked.

"I'm so glad she's to be here at my marriage," said Mary, "because then Edward will know her. I'm so glad that he will see her." "Edward will have other fish to fry, and won't care much about her," said Harry.

"I'm so glad she's going to be at my wedding," said Mary, "because then Edward will meet her. I'm really happy that he will see her." "Edward will have other things to focus on and won't care much about her," said Harry.

"It seems you're going to do the regular thing," said his father, "like all the good apprentices. Marry your master's daughter, and then become Lord Mayor of London." This was not the view in which it had pleased Harry to regard his engagement. All the other "young men" that had gone to Mr. Burton's had married Mr. Burton's daughters,—or, at least, enough had done so to justify the Stratton assertion that all had fallen into the same trap. The Burtons, with their five girls, were supposed in Stratton to have managed their affairs very well, and something of these hints had reached Harry's ears. He would have preferred that the thing should not have been made so common, but he was not fool enough to make himself really unhappy on that head. "I don't know much about becoming Lord Mayor," he replied. "That promotion doesn't lie exactly in our line." "But marrying your master's daughter does, it seems," said the Rector. Harry thought that this, as coming from his father, was almost ill-natured, and therefore dropped the conversation.

"It looks like you're going to do the usual thing," said his father, "like all the good apprentices. Marry your master's daughter, then become Lord Mayor of London." This wasn’t how Harry had thought about his engagement. All the other "young men" who went to Mr. Burton's ended up marrying his daughters—or at least, enough of them did to back up the idea in Stratton that they all fell into the same trap. The Burtons, with their five daughters, were believed in Stratton to have managed their affairs very well, and Harry had heard hints of this. He would have preferred it if this didn’t seem so common, but he wasn’t foolish enough to let it upset him. "I don’t know much about becoming Lord Mayor," he replied. "That promotion isn’t exactly in our line." "But marrying your master’s daughter seems to be," said the Rector. Harry thought this was almost mean coming from his father and decided to drop the topic.

"I'm sure we shall like her," said Fanny.

"I'm sure we're going to like her," said Fanny.

"I think that I shall like Harry's choice," said Mrs. Clavering.

"I think I'm going to like Harry's choice," said Mrs. Clavering.

"I do hope Edward will like her," said Mary.

"I really hope Edward likes her," Mary said.

"Mary," said her sister, "I do wish you were once married. When you are, you'll begin to have a self of your own again. Now you're no better than an unconscious echo."

"Mary," her sister said, "I really wish you would get married. Once you do, you'll start to find yourself again. Right now, you're just an unconscious echo."

"Wait for your own turn, my dear," said the mother.

"Wait for your turn, sweetheart," said the mother.

Harry had reached home on a Saturday, and the following Monday was Christmas-day. Lady Clavering, he was told, was at home at the park, and Sir Hugh had been there lately. No one from the house except the servants were seen at church either on the Sunday or on Christmas-day. "But that shows nothing," said the Rector, speaking in anger. "He very rarely does come, and when he does, it would be better that he should be away. I think that he likes to insult me by misconducting himself. They say that she is not well, and I can easily believe that all this about her sister makes her unhappy. If I were you I would go up and call. Your mother was there the other day, but did not see them. I think you'll find that he's away, hunting somewhere. I saw the groom going off with three horses on Sunday afternoon. He always sends them by the church gate just as we're coming out."

Harry got home on a Saturday, and the following Monday was Christmas Day. He was told that Lady Clavering was at home in the park, and Sir Hugh had been there recently. No one from the house, except for the servants, was seen at church either on Sunday or on Christmas Day. "But that doesn’t mean anything," the Rector said angrily. "He hardly ever comes, and when he does, it’s better that he stays away. I think he enjoys insulting me by behaving badly. They say she’s not well, and I can definitely believe that all this stuff about her sister is making her unhappy. If I were you, I would go visit. Your mother was there the other day but didn’t see them. I think you’ll find he’s out hunting somewhere. I saw the groom leave with three horses on Sunday afternoon. He always sends them out by the church gate just as we’re coming out."

So Harry went up to the house, and found Lady Clavering at home. She was looking old and careworn, but she was glad to see him. Harry was the only one of the rectory family who had been liked at the great house since Sir Hugh's marriage, and he, had he cared to do so, would have been made welcome there. But, as he had once said to Sir Hugh's sister-in-law, if he shot the Clavering game, he would be expected to do so in the guise of a head gamekeeper, and he did not choose to play that part. It would not suit him to drink Sir Hugh's claret, and be bidden to ring the bell, and to be asked to step into the stable for this or that. He was a fellow of his college, and quite as big a man, he thought, as Sir Hugh. He would not be a hanger-on at the park, and, to tell the truth, he disliked his cousin quite as much as his father did. But there had even been a sort of friendship,—nay, occasionally almost a confidence, between him and Lady Clavering, and he believed that by her he was really liked.

So Harry went up to the house and found Lady Clavering at home. She looked older and weary, but she was happy to see him. Harry was the only one from the rectory family who had been liked at the big house since Sir Hugh's marriage, and he could have been made welcome there if he had wanted to. But, as he once told Sir Hugh's sister-in-law, if he were to shoot the Clavering game, he would be expected to do so in the role of a head gamekeeper, and he didn’t want to play that part. It wouldn’t fit him to drink Sir Hugh's claret, be told to ring the bell, or be asked to step into the stable for this or that. He was a fellow of his college and, he thought, just as important as Sir Hugh. He didn’t want to be a hanger-on at the park, and to be honest, he disliked his cousin just as much as his father did. But there was still a kind of friendship—sometimes even a level of trust—between him and Lady Clavering, and he believed she genuinely liked him.

Lady Clavering had heard of his engagement, and of course congratulated him. "Who told you?" he asked,—"was it my mother?"

Lady Clavering had heard about his engagement and naturally congratulated him. "Who told you?" he asked, "was it my mom?"

"No; I have not seen your mother I don't know when. I think it was my maid told me. Though we somehow don't see much of you all at the rectory, our servants are no doubt more gracious with the rectory servants. I'm sure she must be nice, Harry, or you would not have chosen her. I hope she has got some money."

"No, I haven't seen your mother in a while. I think my maid mentioned it. Even though we don't really see much of you all at the rectory, our staff probably gets along well with the rectory staff. I'm sure she's nice, Harry, or you wouldn’t have chosen her. I hope she has some money."

"Yes, I think she is nice. She is coming here at Easter."

"Yeah, I think she's nice. She's coming here for Easter."

"Ah, we shall be away then, you know; and about the money?"

"Ah, we’ll be leaving soon, you know; and what about the money?"

"She will have a little, but very little;—a hundred a year."

"She will have a little, but just a little;—a hundred a year."

"Oh, Harry, is not that rash of you? Younger brothers should always get money. You're the same as a younger brother, you know."

"Oh, Harry, isn’t that reckless of you? Younger brothers should always get money. You’re just like a younger brother, you know."

"My idea is to earn my own bread. It's not very aristocratic, but, after all, there are a great many more in the same boat with me."

"My plan is to make my own living. It’s not very fancy, but, after all, there are a lot of people in the same situation as me."

"Of course you will earn your bread, but having a wife with money would not hinder that. A girl is not the worse because she can bring some help. However, I'm sure I hope you'll be happy."

"Of course you'll earn a living, but having a wife with money wouldn't hurt. A girl isn't any less valuable just because she can contribute financially. Still, I genuinely hope you’ll be happy."

"What I meant was that I think it best when the money comes from the husband."

"What I meant was that I think it’s better when the money comes from the husband."

"I'm sure I ought to agree with you, because we never had any." Then there was a pause. "I suppose you've heard about Lord Ongar," she said.

"I'm sure I should agree with you since we never had any." Then there was a pause. "I guess you've heard about Lord Ongar," she said.

"I have heard that he is very ill."

"I've heard that he's really sick."

"Very ill. I believe there was no hope when we heard last; but Julia never writes now."

"Very sick. I think there was no hope when we last heard; but Julia doesn't write anymore."

"I'm sorry that it is so bad as that," said Harry, not well knowing what else to say.

"I'm sorry it's that bad," said Harry, not really knowing what else to say.

"As regards Julia, I do not know whether it may not be for the best. It seems to be a cruel thing to say, but of course I cannot but think most of her. You have heard, perhaps, that they have not been happy?"

"As for Julia, I’m not sure if it’s not for the best. It sounds harsh to say, but I can’t help but think about her a lot. You may have heard that they haven’t been happy?"

"Yes; I had heard that."

"Yeah, I heard that."

"Of course; and what is the use of pretending anything with you? You know what people have said of her."

"Of course; and what's the point of pretending anything with you? You know what people have said about her."

"I have never believed it."

"I've never believed it."

"You always loved her, Harry. Oh, dear, I remember how unhappy that made me once, and I was so afraid that Hugh would suspect it. She would never have done for you;—would she, Harry?"

"You always loved her, Harry. Oh, I remember how unhappy that made me once, and I was so afraid that Hugh would find out. She would never have been right for you; would she, Harry?"

"She did a great deal better for herself," said Harry.

"She did a lot better for herself," said Harry.

"If you mean that ironically, you shouldn't say it now. If he dies, she will be well off, of course, and people will in time forget what has been said,—that is, if she will live quietly. The worst of it is that she fears nothing."

"If you’re saying that ironically, you shouldn’t say it now. If he dies, she’ll be fine, obviously, and over time people will forget what’s been said—if she can live quietly. The worst part is that she’s afraid of nothing."

"But you speak as though you thought she had been—been—"

"But you talk as if you think she has been—been—

"I think she was probably imprudent, but I believe nothing worse than that. But who can say what is absolutely wrong, and what only imprudent? I think she was too proud to go really astray. And then with such a man as that, so difficult and so ill-tempered—! Sir Hugh thinks—" But at that moment the door was opened and Sir Hugh came in.

"I think she was probably careless, but I believe nothing worse than that. But who can truly say what is completely wrong and what is just careless? I think she was too proud to go seriously off track. And then with a man like that, so hard to deal with and so ill-tempered—! Sir Hugh thinks—" But at that moment, the door opened and Sir Hugh walked in.

"What does Sir Hugh think?" said he.

"What does Sir Hugh think?" he asked.

"We were speaking of Lord Ongar," said Harry, sitting up and shaking hands with his cousin.

"We were talking about Lord Ongar," said Harry, sitting up and shaking hands with his cousin.

"Then, Harry, you were speaking on a subject that I would rather not have discussed in this house. Do you understand that, Hermione? I will have no talking about Lord Ongar or his wife. We know very little, and what we hear is simply uncomfortable. Will you dine here to-day, Harry?"

"Then, Harry, you were talking about something I’d rather not discuss in this house. Do you get that, Hermione? I don’t want to hear anything about Lord Ongar or his wife. We know very little, and whatever we do hear is just uncomfortable. Will you join us for dinner today, Harry?"

"Thank you, no; I have only just come home."

"Thanks, but no; I just got home."

"And I am just going away. That is, I go to-morrow. I cannot stand this place. I think it the dullest neighbourhood in all England, and the most gloomy house I ever saw. Hermione likes it."

"And I'm just leaving. I mean, I'm going tomorrow. I can't stand this place. I think it's the dullest neighborhood in all of England and the gloomiest house I've ever seen. Hermione likes it."

To this last assertion Lady Clavering expressed no assent; nor did she venture to contradict him.

To this last statement, Lady Clavering didn’t agree; nor did she dare to argue with him.

 

 

CHAPTER V.

LADY ONGAR'S RETURN.

But Sir Hugh did not get away from Clavering Park on the next morning as he had intended. There came to him that same afternoon a message by telegraph, to say that Lord Ongar was dead. He had died at Florence on the afternoon of Christmas-day, and Lady Ongar had expressed her intention of coming at once to England.

But Sir Hugh didn’t leave Clavering Park the next morning as he had planned. That same afternoon, he received a telegram saying that Lord Ongar had died. He passed away in Florence on Christmas Day afternoon, and Lady Ongar had stated her intention of coming to England right away.

"Why the devil doesn't she stay where she is?" said Sir Hugh, to his wife. "People would forget her there, and in twelve months time the row would be all over."

"Why on earth doesn't she just stay where she is?" Sir Hugh said to his wife. "People would forget about her there, and in a year, the fuss would be all over."

"Perhaps she does not want to be forgotten," said Lady Clavering.

"Maybe she doesn’t want to be forgotten," Lady Clavering said.

"Then she should want it. I don't care whether she has been guilty or not. When a woman gets her name into such a mess as that, she should keep in the background."

"Then she should want it. I don't care whether she did anything wrong or not. When a woman gets her name caught up in something like that, she should stay out of the spotlight."

"I think you are unjust to her, Hugh."

"I think you're being unfair to her, Hugh."

"Of course you do. You don't suppose that I expect anything else. But if you mean to tell me that there would have been all this row if she had been decently prudent, I tell you that you're mistaken."

"Of course you do. You don’t think I expect anything different. But if you’re saying that there would have been all this commotion if she had been sensible, I’m telling you that you’re wrong."

"Only think what a man he was."

"Just think about what kind of man he was."

"She knew that when she took him, and should have borne with him while he lasted. A woman isn't to have seven thousand a year for nothing."

"She realized that once she took him on, she should have dealt with him as long as he was around. A woman isn't going to get seven thousand a year for free."

"But you forget that not a syllable has been proved against her, or been attempted to be proved. She has never left him, and now she has been with him in his last moments. I don't think you ought to be the first to turn against her."

"But you forget that not a single word has been proven against her, or even attempted to be proven. She has never abandoned him, and now she has been with him in his final moments. I don't think you should be the first to turn against her."

"If she would remain abroad, I would do the best I could for her. She chooses to return home; and as I think she's wrong, I won't have her here;—that's all. You don't suppose that I go about the world accusing her?"

"If she wants to stay abroad, I'll do my best for her. She chooses to come back home, and since I believe she's making a mistake, I won't have her here—that's it. You don't really think I go around accusing her, do you?"

"I think you might do something to fight her battle for her."

"I think you could do something to help her fight her battle."

"I will do nothing,—unless she takes my advice and remains abroad. You must write to her now, and you will tell her what I say. It's an infernal bore, his dying at this moment; but I suppose people won't expect that I'm to shut myself up."

"I won't do anything—unless she takes my advice and stays overseas. You need to write to her right away and tell her what I said. It's incredibly annoying that he's dying right now; but I guess people won't expect me to isolate myself."

For one day only did the baronet shut himself up, and on the following he went whither he had before intended.

For just one day, the baronet isolated himself, and the next day he went where he had planned to go.

Lady Clavering thought it proper to write a line to the rectory, informing the family there that Lord Ongar was no more. This she did in a note to Mrs. Clavering; and when it was received, there came over the faces of them all that lugubrious look, which is, as a matter of course, assumed by decorous people when tidings come of the death of any one who has been known to them, even in the most distant way. With the exception of Harry, all the rectory Claverings had been introduced to Lord Ongar, and were now bound to express something approaching to sorrow. Will any one dare to call this hypocrisy? If it be so called, who in the world is not a hypocrite? Where is the man or woman who has not a special face for sorrow before company? The man or woman who has no such face, would at once be accused of heartless impropriety.

Lady Clavering thought it was appropriate to write a note to the rectory, informing the family there that Lord Ongar had passed away. She did this in a message to Mrs. Clavering; and when it was received, a somber look spread across the faces of everyone, which is what typically happens with respectable people when they hear about the death of someone they’ve known, even if just slightly. Except for Harry, all the Claverings at the rectory had met Lord Ongar, and now they felt obligated to show some form of sorrow. Is anyone brave enough to call this hypocrisy? If that's what you want to call it, then who isn’t a hypocrite? Where is the person who doesn't put on a specific face of sadness in front of others? Anyone who doesn’t would be immediately seen as lacking in sensitivity.

"It is very sad," said Mrs. Clavering; "only think, it is but little more than a year since you married them!"

"It’s really sad,” said Mrs. Clavering; “just think, it’s been barely a year since you married them!”

"And twelve such months as they have been for her!" said the Rector, shaking his head. His face was very lugubrious, for though as a parson he was essentially a kindly, easy man, to whom humbug was odious, and who dealt little in the austerities of clerical denunciation, still he had his face of pulpit sorrow for the sins of the people,—what I may perhaps call his clerical knack of gentle condemnation,—and could therefore assume a solemn look, and a little saddened motion of his head, with more ease than people who are not often called upon for such action.

"And twelve such months as they have been for her!" said the Rector, shaking his head. His face looked very gloomy, because although he was basically a kind and easy-going parson who despised hypocrisy and rarely preached the harshness of clerical judgment, he still had his expression of pulpit sorrow for the people’s sins—what I might call his clerical talent for gentle criticism—and could easily adopt a serious look and a slight, sorrowful nod of his head, more so than those who aren’t often in situations requiring such demeanor.

"Poor woman!" said Fanny, thinking of the woman's married sorrows, and her early widowhood.

"Poor woman!" Fanny said, thinking about the woman's struggles in marriage and her early widowhood.

"Poor man," said Mary, shuddering as she thought of the husband's fate.

"Poor guy," said Mary, shivering as she thought about what had happened to the husband.

"I hope," said Harry, almost sententiously, "that no one in this house will condemn her upon such mere rumours as have been heard."

"I hope," Harry said, almost solemnly, "that no one in this house will judge her based on these mere rumors that have been circulating."

"Why should any one in this house condemn her," said the Rector, "even if there were more than rumours? My dears, judge not, lest ye be judged. As regards her, we are bound by close ties not to speak ill of her—or even to think ill, unless we cannot avoid it. As far as I know, we have not even any reason for thinking ill." Then he went out, changed the tone of his countenance among the rectory stables, and lit his cigar.

"Why should anyone in this house condemn her," said the Rector, "even if there were more than just rumors? My dear friends, don’t judge, or you’ll be judged. As for her, we are closely tied not to speak badly of her—or even think poorly, unless we really can’t help it. As far as I know, we don’t even have any reason to think poorly." Then he went out, changed the expression on his face among the rectory stables, and lit his cigar.

Three days after that a second note was brought down from the great house to the rectory, and this was from Lady Clavering to Harry. "Dear Harry," ran the note,—"Could you find time to come up to me this morning? Sir Hugh has gone to North Priory.—Ever yours, H. C." Harry, of course, went, and as he went, he wondered how Sir Hugh could have had the heart to go to North Priory at such a moment. North Priory was a hunting seat some thirty miles from Clavering, belonging to a great nobleman with whom Sir Hugh much consorted. Harry was grieved that his cousin had not resisted the temptation of going at such a time, but he was quick enough to perceive that Lady Clavering alluded to the absence of her lord as a reason why Harry might pay his visit to the house with satisfaction.

Three days later, a second note was delivered from the big house to the rectory, and it was from Lady Clavering to Harry. "Dear Harry," the note read, "Could you find the time to come see me this morning? Sir Hugh has gone to North Priory.—Always yours, H. C." Harry, of course, went, and as he made his way, he wondered how Sir Hugh could have the heart to leave for North Priory at such a time. North Priory was a hunting lodge about thirty miles from Clavering, owned by a prominent nobleman who was a close friend of Sir Hugh's. Harry was upset that his cousin hadn’t resisted the urge to leave at such a moment, but he quickly realized that Lady Clavering mentioned her husband's absence as a reason for Harry to visit the house with ease.

"I'm so much obliged to you for coming," said Lady Clavering. "I want to know if you can do something for me." As she spoke, she had a paper in her hand which he immediately perceived to be a letter from Italy.

"I'm really grateful to you for coming," said Lady Clavering. "I want to see if you can do something for me." As she spoke, she held a paper in her hand which he quickly realized was a letter from Italy.

"I'll do anything I can, of course, Lady Clavering."

"I'll do whatever I can, of course, Lady Clavering."

"But I must tell you, that I hardly know whether I ought to ask you. I'm doing what would make Hugh very angry. But he is so unreasonable, and so cruel about Julia. He condemns her simply because, as he says, there is no smoke without fire. That is such a cruel thing to say about a woman;—is it not?"

"But I have to say, I’m not sure if I should even ask you. I’m doing something that would really upset Hugh. But he’s so unreasonable and so harsh about Julia. He judges her just because, as he puts it, there’s no smoke without fire. That’s such a cruel thing to say about a woman; isn’t it?"

Harry thought that it was a cruel thing, but as he did not wish to speak evil of Sir Hugh before Lady Clavering, he held his tongue.

Harry thought it was a harsh thing, but since he didn't want to speak poorly of Sir Hugh in front of Lady Clavering, he kept quiet.

"When we got the first news by telegraph, Julia said that she intended to come home at once. Hugh thinks that she should remain abroad for some time, and indeed I am not sure but that would be best. At any rate he made me write to her, and advise her to stay. He declared that if she came at once he would do nothing for her. The truth is, he does not want to have her here, for if she were again in the house he would have to take her part, if ill-natured things were said."

"When we first heard the news by telegraph, Julia said she wanted to come home right away. Hugh thinks she should stay abroad for a while, and honestly, I'm not sure that wouldn't be the best thing. In any case, he made me write to her and suggest she stay. He said that if she came back right away, he wouldn’t help her at all. The truth is, he doesn’t want her here because if she were back in the house, he'd have to defend her if anyone said anything rude."

"That's cowardly," said Harry, stoutly.

"That's cowardly," Harry said firmly.

"Don't say that, Harry, till you have heard it all. If he believes these things, he is right not to wish to meddle. He is very hard, and always believes evil. But he is not a coward. If she were here, living with him as my sister, he would take her part, whatever he might himself think."

"Don’t say that, Harry, until you’ve heard everything. If he believes these things, he’s right not to get involved. He’s really tough and always expects the worst. But he’s not a coward. If she were here, living with him as my sister, he’d stand by her side, no matter what he might think himself."

"But why should he think ill of his own sister-in-law? I have never thought ill of her."

"But why should he think badly of his own sister-in-law? I have never thought badly of her."

"You loved her, and he never did;—though I think he liked her too in his way. But that's what he told me to do, and I did it. I wrote to her, advising her to remain at Florence till the warm weather comes, saying that as she could not specially wish to be in London for the season, I thought she would be more comfortable there than here;—and then I added that Hugh also advised her to stay. Of course I did not say that he would not have her here,—but that was his threat."

"You loved her, and he never did;—though I think he liked her in his own way. But that’s what he told me to do, so I did it. I wrote to her, suggesting that she stay in Florence until it gets warm, saying that since she wouldn’t particularly want to be in London for the season, I thought she’d be more comfortable there than here;—and then I added that Hugh also recommended she stay. Of course, I didn’t mention that he wouldn’t want her here,—but that was his threat."

"She is not likely to press herself where she is not wanted."

"She’s not going to push herself where she’s not welcome."

"No,—and she will not forget her rank and her money;—for that must now be hers. Julia can be quite as hard and as stubborn as he can. But I did write as I say, and I think that if she had got my letter before she had written herself, she would perhaps have stayed. But here is a letter from her, declaring that she will come at once. She will be starting almost as soon as my letter gets there, and I am sure she will not alter her purpose now."

"No—and she won't forget her status and her money; that has to belong to her now. Julia can be just as tough and as stubborn as he is. But I did write what I said, and I believe that if she had received my letter before writing her own, she might have decided to stay. But here’s a letter from her, saying she will come right away. She’ll be leaving almost as soon as my letter arrives, and I’m sure she won’t change her mind now."

"I don't see why she should not come if she likes it."

"I don't see why she shouldn't come if she wants to."

"Only that she might be more comfortable there. But read what she says. You need not read the first part. Not that there is any secret; but it is about him and his last moments, and it would only pain you."

"Just so she could be more comfortable there. But look at what she says. You don’t need to read the first part. It’s not that there’s any secret; it’s just about him and his final moments, and it would only hurt you."

Harry longed to read the whole, but he did as he was bid, and began the letter at the spot which Lady Clavering marked for him with her finger. "I have to start on the third, and as I shall stay nowhere except to sleep at Turin and Paris, I shall be home by the eighth;—I think on the evening of the eighth. I shall bring only my own maid, and one of his men who desires to come back with me. I wish to have apartments taken for me in London. I suppose Hugh will do as much as this for me?"

Harry wanted to read the entire letter, but he did as he was told and started from the part that Lady Clavering pointed out with her finger. "I have to leave on the third, and since I'll only stop to sleep in Turin and Paris, I should be home by the eighth; I think in the evening on the eighth. I’ll only bring my own maid and one of his staff who wants to come back with me. I’d like to have a place set up for me in London. I assume Hugh will help me with this much?"

"I am quite sure Hugh won't," said Lady Clavering, who was watching his eye as he read.

"I’m pretty sure Hugh won’t," said Lady Clavering, who was watching his eyes as he read.

Harry said nothing, but went on reading. "I shall only want two sitting-rooms and two bedrooms,—one for myself and one for Clara,—and should like to have them somewhere near Piccadilly,—in Clarges Street, or about there. You can write me a line, or send me a message to the Hotel Bristol, at Paris. If anything fails, so that I should not hear, I shall go to the Palace Hotel; and, in that case, should telegraph for rooms from Paris."

Harry said nothing and continued reading. "I only need two living rooms and two bedrooms—one for me and one for Clara—and I’d like them to be somewhere near Piccadilly—in Clarges Street, or around that area. You can drop me a note or send me a message at the Hotel Bristol in Paris. If something goes wrong and I don’t hear back, I’ll head to the Palace Hotel; in that case, I’ll send a telegram for rooms from Paris."

"Is that all I'm to read?" Harry asked.

"Is that everything I'm supposed to read?" Harry asked.

"You can go on and see what she says as to her reason for coming." So Harry went on reading. "I have suffered much, and of course I know that I must suffer more; but I am determined that I will face the worst of it at once. It has been hinted to me that an attempt will be made to interfere with the settlement—" "Who can have hinted that?" said Harry. Lady Clavering suspected who might have done so, but she made no answer. "I can hardly think it possible; but, if it is done, I will not be out of the way. I have done my duty as best I could, and have done it under circumstances that I may truly say were terrible;—and I will go on doing it. No one shall say that I am ashamed to show my face and claim my own. You will be surprised when you see me. I have aged so much;—"

"You can go ahead and see what she says about her reason for coming." So Harry continued reading. "I have suffered a lot, and of course I know that I have to suffer more; but I’m determined to face the worst of it right away. It has been hinted to me that someone will try to interfere with the agreement—" "Who could have hinted that?" Harry asked. Lady Clavering had an idea of who it might be, but she didn’t respond. "I can hardly believe it’s possible; but if it happens, I won’t be hiding. I’ve done my duty as best I could, and I’ve done it under what I can honestly say were awful circumstances;—and I will keep doing it. No one will say that I’m ashamed to show my face and claim what’s mine. You’ll be surprised when you see me. I've aged so much;—

"You need not go on," said Lady Clavering. "The rest is about nothing that signifies."

"You don’t have to continue," Lady Clavering said. "The rest is about nothing that matters."

Then Harry refolded the letter and gave it back to his companion.

Then Harry refolded the letter and handed it back to his friend.

"Sir Hugh is gone, and therefore I could not show him that in time to do anything; but if I were to do so, he would simply do nothing, and let her go to the hotel in London. Now that would be unkind;—would it not?"

"Sir Hugh is gone, so I couldn’t show him in time to do anything. But even if I did, he would just do nothing and let her go to the hotel in London. That would be unkind, wouldn’t it?"

"Very unkind, I think."

"That's really unkind, I think."

"It would seem so cold to her on her return."

"It would feel so cold to her when she gets back."

"Very cold. Will you not go and meet her?"

"Really cold. Are you not going to go and meet her?"

Lady Clavering blushed as she answered. Though Sir Hugh was a tyrant to his wife, and known to be such, and though she knew that this was known, she had never said that it was so to any of the Claverings; but now she was driven to confess it. "He would not let me go, Harry. I could not go without telling him, and if I told him he would forbid it."

Lady Clavering blushed as she answered. Even though Sir Hugh was a tyrant to his wife and everyone knew it, she had never admitted it to any of the Claverings; but now she felt compelled to confess. "He wouldn't let me go, Harry. I couldn't leave without telling him, and if I told him, he would prohibit it."

"And she is to be all alone in London, without any friend?"

"And she has to be all alone in London, without a single friend?"

"I shall go to her as soon as he will let me. I don't think he will forbid my going to her, perhaps after a day or two; but I know he would not let me go on purpose to meet her."

"I'll go to her as soon as he allows me. I don't think he'll stop me from going to her, maybe after a day or two; but I know he wouldn't let me go specifically to see her."

"It does seem hard."

"It seems difficult."

"But about the apartments, Harry? I thought that perhaps you would see about them. After all that has passed I could not have asked you, only that now, as you are engaged yourself, it is nearly the same as though you were married. I would ask Archibald, only then there would be a fuss between Archibald and Hugh; and somehow I look on you more as a brother-in-law than I do Archibald."

"But about the apartments, Harry? I thought maybe you could check on them. Given everything that's happened, I wouldn’t have asked you before, but now that you're engaged, it feels almost the same as being married. I would ask Archibald, but then there would be a conflict between Archibald and Hugh; and for some reason, I see you more as a brother-in-law than I do Archibald."

"Is Archie in London?"

"Is Archie in London?"

"His address is at his club, but I daresay he is at North Priory also. At any rate, I shall say nothing to him."

"His address is at his club, but I bet he's also at North Priory. Either way, I won’t say anything to him."

"I was thinking he might have met her."

"I was thinking he might have met her."

"Julia never liked him. And, indeed, I don't think she will care so much about being met. She was always independent in that way, and would go over the world alone better than many men. But couldn't you run up and manage about the apartments? A woman coming home as a widow,—and in her position,—feels an hotel to be so public."

"Julia never liked him. Honestly, I don’t think she’ll mind being picked up. She was always independent that way and could travel the world alone better than most men. But couldn’t you hurry and sort out the apartments? A woman coming home as a widow—and in her situation—finds a hotel to be too public."

"I will see about the apartments."

"I'll look into the apartments."

"I knew you would. And there will be time for you to send to me, so that I can write to Paris;—will there not? There is more than a week, you know."

"I knew you would. And there will be time for you to send me something so I can write to Paris;—won't there? There's more than a week, you know."

But Henry did not wish to go to London on this business immediately. He had made up his mind that he would not only take the rooms, but that he would also meet Lady Ongar at the station. He said nothing of this to Lady Clavering, as, perhaps, she might not approve; but such was his intention. He was wrong no doubt. A man in such cases should do what he is asked to do, and do no more. But he repeated to himself the excuse that Lady Clavering had made,—namely, that he was already the same as a married man, and that, therefore, no harm could come of his courtesy to his cousin's wife's sister. But he did not wish to make two journeys to London, nor did he desire to be away for a full week out of his holidays. Lady Clavering could not press him to go at once, and, therefore, it was settled as he proposed. She would write to Paris immediately, and he would go up to London after three or four days. "If we only knew of any apartments, we could write," said Lady Clavering. "You could not know that they were comfortable," said Harry; "and you will find that I will do it in plenty of time." Then he took his leave; but Lady Clavering had still one other word to say to him. "You had better not say anything about all this at the rectory; had you?" Harry, without considering much about it, said that he would not mention it.

But Henry didn’t want to go to London about this right away. He had decided that he would not only take the rooms, but also meet Lady Ongar at the station. He didn’t mention this to Lady Clavering, as she might not approve; but that was his plan. He knew he was probably wrong. A man in these situations should do what he’s asked and nothing more. But he reminded himself of Lady Clavering's excuse—that he was essentially a married man, so there was no harm in being polite to his cousin's wife's sister. However, he didn’t want to make two trips to London, nor did he want to spend a full week away from his holiday. Lady Clavering couldn’t insist that he go immediately, so they agreed on his plan. She would write to Paris right away, and he would go to London after three or four days. "If only we knew of any apartments, we could write," said Lady Clavering. "You couldn’t know that they were comfortable," said Harry; "and you’ll see that I’ll take care of it in plenty of time." Then he took his leave, but Lady Clavering had one more thing to say to him. "You’d better not mention any of this at the rectory, okay?" Harry, not thinking too much about it, said he wouldn’t bring it up.

Then he went away and walked again about the park, thinking of it all. He had not seen her since he had walked round the park, in his misery, after parting with her in the garden. How much had happened since then! She had been married in her glory, had become a countess, and then a widow, and was now returning with a tarnished name, almost repudiated by those who had been her dearest friends; but with rank and fortune at her command,—and again a free woman. He could not but think what might have been his chance were it not for Florence Burton! But much had happened to him also. He had almost perished in his misery;—so he told himself;—but had once more "tricked his beams,"—that was his expression to himself,—and was now "flaming in the forehead" of a glorious love. And even if there had been no such love, would a widowed countess with a damaged name have suited his ambition, simply because she had the rich dower of the poor wretch to whom she had sold herself? No, indeed. There could be no question of renewed vows between them now;—there could have been no such question even had there been no "glorious love," which had accrued to him almost as his normal privilege in right of his pupilage in Mr. Burton's office. No;—there could be, there could have been, nothing now between him and the widowed Countess of Ongar. But, nevertheless, he liked the idea of meeting her in London. He felt some triumph in the thought that he should be the first to touch her hand on her return after all that she had suffered. He would be very courteous to her, and would spare no trouble that would give her any ease. As for her rooms, he would see to everything of which he could think that might add to her comfort; and a wish crept upon him, uninvited, that she might be conscious of what he had done for her.

Then he walked around the park again, thinking about everything. He hadn't seen her since he had wandered through the park, feeling miserable after their parting in the garden. So much had happened since then! She had gotten married in her prime, become a countess, and then a widow, and was now coming back with a tarnished reputation, nearly rejected by her closest friends; but she had wealth and status at her disposal— and she was a free woman again. He couldn't help but wonder what his chances might have been if it weren’t for Florence Burton! But a lot had happened to him too. He had nearly succumbed to his despair;— so he told himself;— but he had once more "found his energy,"—that was his way of putting it,— and was now experiencing a "thrilling love." And even if that love didn’t exist, would a widowed countess with a bad reputation have been right for his ambitions, just because she had the wealth inherited from the poor guy she had married? No way. There was no question of rekindling vows between them now;— there wouldn't have been even if there hadn't been any "thrilling love," which had come to him almost as a right due to his training in Mr. Burton's office. No;— there could be, there could have been, nothing now between him and the widowed Countess of Ongar. Yet, he liked the thought of meeting her in London. He felt a sense of triumph in the idea that he would be the first to shake her hand upon her return after everything she had been through. He would be very courteous and go out of his way to make her feel comfortable. As for her accommodations, he would take care of everything he could think of to ensure her comfort; and an uninvited wish crept into his mind that she might notice what he had done for her.

Would she be aware, he wondered, that he was engaged? Lady Clavering had known it for the last three months, and would probably have mentioned the circumstance in a letter. But perhaps not. The sisters, he knew, had not been good correspondents; and he almost wished that she might not know it. "I should not care to be talking to her about Florence," he said to himself.

Would she even know that he was engaged? Lady Clavering had been aware of it for the past three months and would probably have brought it up in a letter. But maybe not. He knew the sisters weren't great at keeping in touch, and he almost hoped she didn’t know. "I wouldn’t want to talk to her about Florence," he thought to himself.

It was very strange that they should come to meet in such a way, after all that had passed between them in former days. Would it occur to her that he was the only man she had ever loved?—for, of course, as he well knew, she had never loved her husband. Or would she now be too callous to everything but the outer world to think at all of such a subject? She had said that she was aged, and he could well believe it. Then he pictured her to himself in her weeds, worn, sad, thin, but still proud and handsome. He had told Florence of his early love for the woman whom Lord Ongar had married, and had described with rapture his joy that that early passion had come to nothing. Now he would have to tell Florence of this meeting; and he thought of the comparison he would make between her bright young charms and the shipwrecked beauty of the widow. On the whole, he was proud that he had been selected for the commission, as he liked to think of himself as one to whom things happened which were out of the ordinary course. His only objection to Florence was that she had come to him so much in the ordinary course.

It was really odd that they should meet like this, after everything that had happened between them in the past. Would it dawn on her that he was the only man she had ever truly loved?—because, as he knew all too well, she had never loved her husband. Or would she now be too indifferent to anything but the outside world to think about that at all? She had mentioned that she was getting old, and he could certainly believe it. Then he imagined her in her mourning clothes, worn down, sad, and thin, but still proud and beautiful. He had told Florence about his first love for the woman who had married Lord Ongar, and he had described with delight his relief that that early passion had come to nothing. Now he would have to tell Florence about this meeting, and he thought about how he would compare her youthful charm to the faded beauty of the widow. Overall, he felt proud to have been chosen for this task, as he liked to think of himself as someone to whom unusual things happened. His only issue with Florence was that she had come to him so much in the usual way.

"I suppose the truth is you are tired of our dulness," said his father to him, when he declared his purpose of going up to London, and, in answer to certain questions that were asked him, had hesitated to tell his business.

"I guess the truth is that you’re tired of our boring life," his father said to him when he announced his plan to go to London and, in response to some questions he was asked, hesitated to reveal his reasons.

"Indeed, it is not so," said Harry, earnestly; "but I have a commission to execute for a certain person, and I cannot explain what it is."

"Actually, that’s not true," Harry said seriously; "but I have a task to complete for someone, and I can't explain what it is."

"Another secret;—eh, Harry?"

"Another secret, right, Harry?"

"I am very sorry,—but it is a secret. It is not one of my own seeking; that is all I can say." His mother and sisters also asked him a question or two; but when he became mysterious, they did not persevere. "Of course it is something about Florence," said Fanny. "I'll be bound he is going to meet her. What will you bet me, Harry, you don't go to the play with Florence before you come home?" To this Henry deigned no answer; and after that no more questions were asked.

"I’m really sorry, but it’s a secret. It’s not something I’m looking for; that’s all I can say." His mother and sisters also asked him a question or two, but when he started being mysterious, they didn’t push it. "Of course, it’s something about Florence," Fanny said. "I bet he’s going to meet her. What will you bet me, Harry, that you won’t go to the play with Florence before you come home?" Henry didn’t respond to this, and after that, no more questions were asked.

He went up to London and took rooms in Bolton Street. There was a pretty fresh-looking light drawing-room, or, indeed, two drawing-rooms, and a small dining-room, and a large bed-room looking over upon the trees of some great nobleman's garden. As Harry stood at the window it seemed so odd to him that he should be there. And he was busy about everything in the chamber, seeing that all things were clean and well ordered. Was the woman of the house sure of her cook? Sure; of course she was sure. Had not old Lady Dimdaff lived there for two years, and nobody ever was so particular about her victuals as Lady Dimdaff. "And would Lady Ongar keep her own carriage?" As to this Harry could say nothing. Then came the question of price, and Harry found his commission very difficult. The sum asked seemed to be enormous. "Seven guineas a week at that time of the year!" Lady Dimdaff had always paid seven guineas. "But that was in the season," suggested Harry. To this the woman replied that it was the season now. Harry felt that he did not like to drive a bargain for the Countess, who would probably care very little what she paid, and therefore assented. But a guinea a day for lodgings did seem a great deal of money. He was prepared to marry and commence housekeeping upon a less sum for all his expenses. However, he had done his commission, had written to Lady Clavering, and had telegraphed to Paris. He had almost brought himself to write to Lady Ongar, but when the moment came he abstained. He had sent the telegram as from H. Clavering. She might think that it came from Hugh if she pleased.

He went up to London and got a place on Bolton Street. There was a nice, fresh-looking light drawing-room, or actually two drawing-rooms, a small dining room, and a large bedroom overlooking the trees of a big nobleman's garden. As Harry stood at the window, it felt strange to him that he was there. He was busy making sure everything in the room was clean and tidy. Was the landlady sure about her cook? Of course, she was sure. Hadn't old Lady Dimdaff lived there for two years, and nobody was more particular about her food than Lady Dimdaff? "And would Lady Ongar keep her own carriage?" Harry didn’t know about that. Then the price came up, and Harry found negotiating difficult. The amount asked seemed crazy. "Seven guineas a week at this time of year!" Lady Dimdaff had always paid seven guineas. "But that was in the season," Harry pointed out. The landlady replied that it was the season now. Harry felt uncomfortable negotiating for the Countess, who probably wouldn’t care much about what she paid, so he agreed. But a guinea a day for lodging did feel like a lot of money. He was ready to get married and run a household on less than that for all his expenses. Still, he had done his task, written to Lady Clavering, and sent a telegram to Paris. He nearly decided to write to Lady Ongar, but when the moment came, he held back. He had sent the telegram as from H. Clavering. She could think it was from Hugh if she wanted.

He was unable not to attend specially to his dress when he went to meet her at the Victoria Station. He told himself that he was an ass,—but still he went on being an ass. During the whole afternoon he could do nothing but think of what he had in hand. He was to tell Florence everything, but had Florence known the actual state of his mind, I doubt whether she would have been satisfied with him. The train was due at 8 P.M. He dined at the Oxford and Cambridge Club at six, and then went to his lodgings to take one last look at his outer man. The evening was very fine, but he went down to the station in a cab, because he would not meet Lady Ongar in soiled boots. He told himself again that he was an ass; and then tried to console himself by thinking that such an occasion as this seldom happened once to any man,—could hardly happen more than once to any man. He had hired a carriage for her, not thinking it fit that Lady Ongar should be taken to her new home in a cab; and when he was at the station, half an hour before the proper time, was very fidgety because it had not come. Ten minutes before eight he might have been seen standing at the entrance to the station looking out anxiously for the vehicle. The man was there, of course, in time, but Harry made himself angry because he could not get the carriage so placed that Lady Ongar might be sure of stepping into it without leaving the platform. Punctually to the moment the coming train announced itself by its whistle, and Harry Clavering felt himself to be in a flutter.

He couldn't help but pay special attention to his outfit when he went to meet her at Victoria Station. He called himself a fool—but still, he couldn't stop acting like one. All afternoon, he could think of nothing else but what he had to do. He was planning to tell Florence everything, but if she had known what was really on his mind, I doubt she would have been pleased with him. The train was scheduled to arrive at 8 P.M. He had dinner at the Oxford and Cambridge Club at six, then went back to his place to take one last look at himself. The evening was lovely, but he took a cab to the station because he didn’t want to meet Lady Ongar in dirty boots. Again, he called himself a fool; then tried to comfort himself by thinking that an occasion like this rarely happens to any man—probably wouldn’t happen more than once. He had arranged for a carriage for her, believing it wouldn’t be right for Lady Ongar to go to her new home in a cab. When he arrived at the station half an hour early, he was quite anxious because it hadn’t arrived. Ten minutes before eight, he could be seen standing at the entrance looking out nervously for the carriage. The driver was, of course, on time, but Harry got frustrated because he couldn’t position the carriage so that Lady Ongar could step into it without leaving the platform. Right on cue, the train signaled its arrival with a whistle, and Harry Clavering felt his stomach flutter.

The train came up along the platform, and Harry stood there expecting to see Julia Brabazon's head projected from the first window that caught his eye. It was of Julia Brabazon's head, and not of Lady Ongar's, that he was thinking. But he saw no sign of her presence while the carriages were coming to a stand-still, and the platform was covered with passengers before he discovered her whom he was seeking. At last he encountered in the crowd a man in livery, and found from him that he was Lady Ongar's servant. "I have come to meet Lady Ongar," said Harry, "and have got a carriage for her." Then the servant found his mistress, and Harry offered his hand to a tall woman in black. She wore a black straw hat with a veil, but the veil was so thick that Harry could not at all see her face.

The train rolled up to the platform, and Harry stood there hoping to see Julia Brabazon’s head popping out of the first window he noticed. He was focused on Julia and not on Lady Ongar. But he didn’t see any sign of her as the carriages came to a stop, and it was crowded with passengers before he finally spotted the person he was looking for. Eventually, he spotted a man in uniform and learned that he was Lady Ongar’s servant. "I’ve come to meet Lady Ongar," Harry said, “and I have a carriage for her.” The servant then located his mistress, and Harry extended his hand to a tall woman dressed in black. She wore a black straw hat with a veil, but the veil was so thick that Harry couldn’t see her face at all.

"Is that Mr. Clavering?" said she.

"Is that Mr. Clavering?" she asked.

"Yes," said Harry, "it is I. Your sister asked me to take rooms for you, and as I was in town I thought I might as well meet you to see if you wanted anything. Can I get the luggage?"

"Yes," Harry said, "it's me. Your sister asked me to book a room for you, and since I was in town, I figured I might as well meet up and see if you need anything. Can I grab the luggage?"

"Thank you;—the man will do that. He knows where the things are."

"Thanks; the guy will take care of it. He knows where everything is."

"I ordered a carriage;—shall I show him where it is? Perhaps you will let me take you to it? They are so stupid here. They would not let me bring it up."

"I ordered a carriage;—should I show him where it is? Maybe you’ll let me take you to it? They're so clueless here. They wouldn't let me bring it up."

"It will do very well I'm sure. It's very kind of you. The rooms are in Bolton Street. I have the number here. Oh! thank you." But she would not take his arm. So he led the way, and stood at the door while she got into the carriage with her maid. "I'd better show the man where you are now." This he did, and afterwards shook hands with her through the carriage window. This was all he saw of her, and the words which have been repeated were all that were spoken. Of her face he had not caught a glimpse.

"It'll work out great, I'm sure. That's really nice of you. The rooms are on Bolton Street. I have the address right here. Oh! Thank you." But she wouldn’t take his arm. So he led the way and stood at the door while she got into the carriage with her maid. "I should probably show the driver where you are now." He did this and then shook hands with her through the carriage window. That was all he saw of her, and those were the only words exchanged. He didn't even catch a glimpse of her face.

As he went home to his lodgings he was conscious that the interview had not been satisfactory. He could not say what more he wanted, but he felt that there was something amiss. He consoled himself, however, by reminding himself that Florence Burton was the girl whom he had really loved, and not Julia Brabazon. Lady Ongar had given him no invitation to come and see her, and therefore he determined that he would return home on the following day without going near Bolton Street. He had pictured to himself beforehand the sort of description he would give to Lady Clavering of her sister; but, seeing how things had turned out, he made up his mind that he would say nothing of the meeting. Indeed, he would not go up to the great house at all. He had done Lady Clavering's commission,—at some little trouble and expense to himself, and there should be an end of it. Lady Ongar would not mention that she had seen him. He doubted, indeed, whether she would remember whom she had seen. For any good that he had done, or for any sentiment that there had been, his cousin Hugh's butler might as well have gone to the train. In this mood he returned home, consoling himself with the fitness of things which had given him Florence Burton instead of Julia Brabazon for a wife.

As he headed back to his place, he realized that the meeting hadn’t gone well. He couldn’t pinpoint what was missing, but he sensed something was off. To ease his mind, he reminded himself that Florence Burton was the girl he truly loved, not Julia Brabazon. Lady Ongar hadn’t invited him to visit, so he decided he would go home the next day without stopping by Bolton Street. He had imagined how he would describe her to Lady Clavering, but given how things had unfolded, he resolved to say nothing about the meeting. In fact, he wouldn’t even visit the big house at all. He had completed Lady Clavering’s task—at some trouble and expense to himself, and that should be that. Lady Ongar probably wouldn’t bring up that she had seen him. He actually doubted she’d even remember who she had met. For all the good he’d done, or any feelings that might have been involved, his cousin Hugh’s butler might as well have gone to the train instead. With that thought, he went home, comforting himself with the idea that it was fitting he had Florence Burton instead of Julia Brabazon as his future wife.

 

 

CHAPTER VI.

THE REV. SAMUEL SAUL.

During Harry's absence in London, a circumstance had occurred at the rectory which had surprised some of them and annoyed others a good deal. Mr. Saul, the curate, had made an offer to Fanny. The Rector and Fanny declared themselves to be both surprised and annoyed. That the Rector was in truth troubled by the thing was very evident. Mrs. Clavering said that she had almost suspected it,—that she was at any rate not surprised; as to the offer itself, of course she was sorry that it should have been made, as it could not suit Fanny to accept it. Mary was surprised, as she had thought Mr. Saul to be wholly intent on other things; but she could not see any reason why the offer should be regarded as being on his part unreasonable.

During Harry's time away in London, something happened at the rectory that surprised some people and annoyed others quite a bit. Mr. Saul, the curate, had proposed to Fanny. Both the Rector and Fanny claimed to be surprised and annoyed. It was clear that the Rector was genuinely troubled by this situation. Mrs. Clavering mentioned that she had almost suspected it—she definitely wasn't surprised; as for the proposal itself, she was disappointed it had been made, since it wouldn’t be suitable for Fanny to accept it. Mary was surprised, as she thought Mr. Saul was completely focused on other matters, but she didn’t think there was any reason to consider the proposal unreasonable on his part.

"How can you say so, mamma?" Such had been Fanny's indignant exclamation when Mrs. Clavering had hinted that Mr. Saul's proceeding had been expected by her.

"How can you say that, Mom?" That was Fanny's outraged response when Mrs. Clavering suggested that she had been expecting Mr. Saul's actions.

"Simply because I saw that he liked you, my dear. Men under such circumstances have different ways of showing their liking."

"Honestly, I noticed that he liked you, my dear. Guys have different ways of showing their feelings in situations like that."

Fanny, who had seen all of Mary's love-affair from the beginning to the end, and who had watched the Reverend Edward Fielding in all his very conspicuous manœuvres, would not agree to this. Edward Fielding from the first moment of his intimate acquaintance with Mary had left no doubt of his intentions on the mind of any one. He had talked to Mary and walked with Mary whenever he was allowed or found it possible to do so. When driven to talk to Fanny, he had always talked about Mary. He had been a lover of the good, old, plainspoken stamp, about whom there had been no mistake. From the first moment of his coming much about Clavering Rectory the only question had been about his income. "I don't think Mr. Saul ever said a word to me except about the poor people and the church-services," said Fanny. "That was merely his way," said Mrs. Clavering. "Then he must be a goose," said Fanny. "I am very sorry if I have made him unhappy, but he had no business to come to me in that way."

Fanny, who had witnessed all of Mary's relationship from start to finish, and had observed the Reverend Edward Fielding in all his obvious actions, would not go along with this. From the very first moment he got close to Mary, Edward Fielding made his intentions clear to everyone. He talked to Mary and walked with her whenever he could. When he had to talk to Fanny, he always brought up Mary. He was a straightforward type of guy – the kind where there was no confusion about his feelings. From the moment he arrived at Clavering Rectory, the only thing people were curious about was his income. "I don't think Mr. Saul ever spoke to me about anything except the poor and the church services," Fanny said. "That was just his way," Mrs. Clavering replied. "Then he must be a fool," Fanny said. "I’m really sorry if I made him unhappy, but he shouldn’t have approached me like that."

"I suppose I shall have to look for another curate," said the Rector. But this was said in private to his wife.

"I guess I'll have to look for another curate," said the Rector. But this was said in private to his wife.

"I don't see that at all," said Mrs. Clavering. "With many men it would be so; but I think you will find that he will take an answer, and that there will be an end of it."

"I don’t see it that way at all," said Mrs. Clavering. "With a lot of men, that would be the case; but I think you’ll find that he will accept an answer, and that will be the end of it."

Fanny, perhaps, had a right to be indignant, for certainly Mr. Saul had given her no fair warning of his intention. Mary had for some months been intent rather on Mr. Fielding's church matters than on those going on in her own parish, and therefore there had been nothing singular in the fact that Mr. Saul had said more on such matters to Fanny than to her sister. Fanny was eager and active, and as Mr. Saul was very eager and very active, it was natural that they should have had some interests in common. But there had been no private walkings, and no talkings that could properly be called private. There was a certain book which Fanny kept, containing the names of all the poor people in the parish, to which Mr. Saul had access equally with herself; but its contents were of a most prosaic nature, and when she had sat over it in the rectory drawing-room, with Mr. Saul by her side, striving to extract more than twelve pennies out of charity shillings, she had never thought that it would lead to a declaration of love.

Fanny had every right to be upset because Mr. Saul definitely hadn’t given her any warning about his intentions. For several months, Mary had been more focused on Mr. Fielding's church matters than on what was happening in their own parish, so it wasn’t strange that Mr. Saul talked more to Fanny about those issues than to her sister. Fanny was enthusiastic and proactive, and since Mr. Saul was also very eager and active, it made sense that they shared some common interests. However, there hadn’t been any private walks or conversations that could be considered private. Fanny had a certain notebook where she kept the names of all the poor people in the parish, which Mr. Saul had just as much access to as she did; but its contents were quite mundane, and while she sat with Mr. Saul in the rectory drawing room, trying to squeeze more than twelve pennies out of charity shillings, she had never thought it would lead to a love confession.

He had never called her Fanny in his life,—not up to the moment when she declined the honour of becoming Mrs. Saul. The offer itself was made in this wise. She had been at the house of old Widow Tubb, half-way between Cumberly Green and the little village of Clavering, striving to make that rheumatic old woman believe that she had not been cheated by a general conspiracy of the parish in the matter of a distribution of coal, when, just as she was about to leave the cottage, Mr. Saul came up. It was then past four, and the evening was becoming dark, and there was, moreover, a slight drizzle of rain. It was not a tempting evening for a walk of a mile and a half through a very dirty lane; but Fanny Clavering did not care much for such things, and was just stepping out into the mud and moisture, with her dress well looped up, when Mr. Saul accosted her.

He had never called her Fanny in his life—until the moment she declined the honor of becoming Mrs. Saul. The proposal was made like this: She had been at the home of old Widow Tubb, halfway between Cumberly Green and the little village of Clavering, trying to convince that rheumatic old woman that she hadn’t been cheated by a conspiracy from the parish regarding the distribution of coal. Just as she was about to leave the cottage, Mr. Saul approached her. It was past four, the evening was getting dark, and there was a light drizzle of rain. It wasn't an inviting evening for a mile-and-a-half walk through a very muddy lane; but Fanny Clavering wasn’t too concerned about that and was just stepping out into the mud and moisture, her dress hiked up, when Mr. Saul spoke to her.

"I'm afraid you'll be very wet, Miss Clavering."

"I'm worried you'll get quite soaked, Miss Clavering."

"That will be better than going without my cup of tea, Mr. Saul, which I should have to do if I stayed any longer with Mrs. Tubb. And I have got an umbrella."

"That'll be better than not having my cup of tea, Mr. Saul, which I'd have to do if I stayed any longer with Mrs. Tubb. And I’ve got an umbrella."

"But it is so dark and dirty," said he.

"But it's so dark and dirty," he said.

"I'm used to that, as you ought to know."

"I'm used to that, as you should know."

"Yes; I do know it," said he, walking on with her. "I do know that nothing ever turns you away from the good work."

"Yes, I know," he said, walking with her. "I know that nothing ever stops you from doing the right thing."

There was something in the tone of his voice which Fanny did not like. He had never complimented her before. They had been very intimate and had often scolded each other. Fanny would accuse him of exacting too much from the people, and he would retort upon her that she coddled them. Fanny would often decline to obey him, and he would make angry hints as to his clerical authority. In this way they had worked together pleasantly, without any of the awkwardness which on other terms would have arisen between a young man and a young woman. But now that he began to praise her with some peculiar intention of meaning in his tone, she was confounded. She had made no immediate answer to him, but walked on rapidly through the mud and slush.

There was something in the tone of his voice that Fanny didn't like. He had never complimented her before. They had been very close and often scolded each other. Fanny would accuse him of demanding too much from people, and he would fire back that she spoiled them. Fanny would often refuse to listen to him, and he would make annoyed remarks about his authority as a clergyman. In this way, they had worked together comfortably, without the awkwardness that might have come up between a young man and a young woman under different circumstances. But now that he started praising her with some strange intention behind his words, she was taken aback. She didn’t respond right away, but quickly walked on through the mud and slush.

"You are very constant," said he; "I have not been two years at Clavering without finding that out." It was becoming worse and worse. It was not so much his words which provoked her as the tone in which they were uttered. And yet she had not the slightest idea of what was coming. If, thoroughly admiring her devotion and mistaken as to her character, he were to ask her to become a Protestant nun, or suggest to her that she should leave her home and go as nurse into a hospital, then there would have occurred the sort of folly of which she believed him to be capable. Of the folly which he now committed, she had not believed him to be capable.

"You’re really consistent," he said; "I haven’t been at Clavering for two years without noticing that." It was getting worse and worse. It wasn’t so much what he said that upset her, but the tone he used. And yet she had no idea what was coming. If he, genuinely admiring her dedication and misunderstanding her character, were to ask her to become a Protestant nun or suggest that she leave her home to work as a nurse in a hospital, then she would have seen the kind of foolishness she thought he was capable of. The foolishness he was actually committing now, she never imagined he would do.

It had come on to rain hard, and she held her umbrella low over her head. He also was walking with an open umbrella in his hand, so that they were not very close to each other. Fanny, as she stepped on impetuously, put her foot into the depth of a pool, and splashed herself thoroughly.

It started to rain heavily, and she kept her umbrella low over her head. He was also walking with an open umbrella in his hand, which meant they weren't very close to each other. As Fanny eagerly stepped forward, she accidentally stepped into a puddle and got herself completely soaked.

"Oh dear, oh dear," said she; "this is very disagreeable."

"Oh no, oh no," she said; "this is really unpleasant."

"Miss Clavering," said he, "I have been looking for an opportunity to speak to you, and I do not know when I may find another so suitable as this." She still believed that some proposition was to be made to her which would be disagreeable, and perhaps impertinent,—but it never occurred to her that Mr. Saul was in want of a wife.

"Miss Clavering," he said, "I've been looking for a chance to talk to you, and I don’t know when I’ll find another opportunity as good as this." She still thought he was about to make some proposal that would be unpleasant and maybe even rude—but it never crossed her mind that Mr. Saul was looking for a wife.

"Doesn't it rain too hard for talking?" she said.

"Isn't it raining too hard to talk?" she said.

"As I have begun I must go on with it now," he replied, raising his voice a little, as though it were necessary that he should do so to make her hear him through the rain and darkness. She moved a little further away from him with unthinking irritation; but still he went on with his purpose. "Miss Clavering, I know that I am ill-suited to play the part of a lover;—very ill suited." Then she gave a start and again splashed herself sadly. "I have never read how it is done in books, and have not allowed my imagination to dwell much on such things."

"As I started, I have to keep going now," he replied, raising his voice slightly, as if it was necessary to be heard over the rain and darkness. She moved a bit further away from him, feeling irritated without realizing it; but he continued with his intention. "Miss Clavering, I know I'm not the right person to play the role of a lover;—not at all suited for it." At that, she jumped a little and splashed herself sadly. "I’ve never learned how it’s done in books, and I haven’t let my imagination linger much on those kinds of things."

"Mr. Saul, don't go on; pray don't." Now she did understand what was coming.

"Mr. Saul, please don't continue; I beg you." Now she realized what was about to happen.

"Yes, Miss Clavering, I must go on now; but not on that account would I press you to give me an answer to-day. I have learned to love you, and if you can love me in return, I will take you by the hand, and you shall be my wife. I have found that in you which I have been unable not to love,—not to covet that I may bind it to myself as my own for ever. Will you think of this, and give me an answer when you have considered it fully?"

"Yes, Miss Clavering, I need to move on now; but I won’t rush you for an answer today. I’ve come to love you, and if you can love me back, I want to hold your hand, and you will be my wife. I’ve discovered something in you that I can’t help but love—something I want to secure for myself forever. Will you think about this and give me your answer once you’ve thought it through?"

Mr. Saul proposes.
Mr. Saul suggests.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

He had not spoken altogether amiss, and Fanny, though she was very angry with him, was conscious of this. The time he had chosen might not be considered suitable for a declaration of love, nor the place; but having chosen them, he had, perhaps, made the best of them. There had been no hesitation in his voice, and his words had been perfectly audible.

He hadn't spoken completely off the mark, and Fanny, even though she was really angry with him, was aware of this. The timing might not have seemed right for a love declaration, and neither did the place; but since he had picked them, he might have made the best out of it. There was no hesitation in his voice, and his words were clearly heard.

"Oh, Mr. Saul, of course I can assure you at once," said Fanny. "There need not be any consideration. I really have never thought—" Fanny, who knew her own mind on the matter thoroughly, was hardly able to express herself plainly and without incivility. As soon as that phrase "of course" had passed her lips, she felt that it should not have been spoken. There was no need that she should insult him by telling him that such a proposition from him could have but one answer.

"Oh, Mr. Saul, I can definitely assure you right away," said Fanny. "There shouldn't be any consideration. I honestly have never thought—" Fanny, who was completely sure of her stance on the issue, struggled to express herself clearly and politely. As soon as she said the phrase "of course," she realized it shouldn't have come out. There was no reason to insult him by indicating that such a proposal from him could only have one response.

"No, Miss Clavering; I know you have never thought of it, and therefore it would be well that you should take time. I have not been able to make manifest to you by little signs, as men do who are less awkward, all the love that I have felt for you. Indeed, could I have done so, I should still have hesitated till I had thoroughly resolved that I might be better with a wife than without one; and had resolved also, as far as that might be possible for me, that you also would be better with a husband."

"No, Miss Clavering; I know you’ve never considered it, and so it’s best for you to take your time. I haven’t been able to express all the love I feel for you through subtle hints like other guys might, since I’m not that smooth. Honestly, even if I could have, I would still have hesitated until I was completely sure that I would be better off with a wife than without one; and I also wanted to be sure, as much as I could, that you would be happier with a husband."

"Mr. Saul, really that should be for me to think of."

"Mr. Saul, that really should be my responsibility."

"And for me also. Can any man offer to marry a woman,—to bind a woman for life to certain duties, and to so close an obligation, without thinking whether such bonds would be good for her as well as for himself? Of course you must think for yourself;—and so have I thought for you. You should think for yourself, and you should think also for me."

"And for me too. Can any man propose to marry a woman—to commit her for life to certain responsibilities, and to create such a close obligation—without considering whether those bonds would be beneficial for her as well as for himself? Of course, you must think for yourself; and I have thought about it for you. You should think for yourself, and you should also think about me."

Fanny was quite aware that as regarded herself, the matter was one which required no more thinking. Mr. Saul was not a man with whom she could bring herself to be in love. She had her own ideas as to what was loveable in men, and the eager curate, splashing through the rain by her side, by no means came up to her standard of excellence. She was unconsciously aware that he had altogether mistaken her character, and given her credit for more abnegation of the world than she pretended to possess, or was desirous of possessing. Fanny Clavering was in no hurry to get married. I do not know that she had even made up her mind that marriage would be a good thing for her; but she had an untroubled conviction that if she did marry, her husband should have a house and an income. She had no reliance on her own power of living on a potato, and with one new dress every year. A comfortable home, with nice, comfortable things around her, ease in money matters, and elegance in life, were charms with which she had not quarrelled, and, though she did not wish to be hard upon Mr. Saul on account of his mistake, she did feel that in making his proposition he had blundered. Because she chose to do her duty as a parish clergyman's daughter, he thought himself entitled to regard her as devotée, who would be willing to resign everything to become the wife of a clergyman, who was active, indeed, but who had not one shilling of income beyond his curacy. "Mr. Saul," she said, "I can assure you I need take no time for further thinking. It cannot be as you would have it."

Fanny was fully aware that, as far as she was concerned, this was a matter that required no further thought. Mr. Saul was not someone she could see herself falling in love with. She had her own ideas about what qualities were attractive in men, and the eager curate, splashing through the rain next to her, definitely didn't meet her standards. She was subconsciously aware that he had completely misjudged her character and credited her with more selflessness than she actually claimed or wanted to have. Fanny Clavering wasn't in a rush to get married. I don't think she had even decided that marriage would be good for her; but she firmly believed that if she did marry, her husband would need to have a home and an income. She had no faith in her ability to survive on just a potato and one new dress each year. A comfortable home, filled with nice, cozy things, financial ease, and a touch of elegance in life were all advantages she valued, and while she didn't want to be too harsh on Mr. Saul for his misunderstanding, she felt he had made a mistake by proposing. Just because she chose to fulfill her duty as a parish clergyman's daughter, he thought he could assume she would be a devoted wife willing to give up everything to marry a clergyman who was active but had not a penny beyond his salary. "Mr. Saul," she said, "I can assure you I need no time for further consideration. It can't be as you envision."

"Perhaps I have been abrupt. Indeed, I feel that it is so, though I did not know how to avoid it."

"Maybe I've been a bit harsh. Actually, I think I have, even though I didn't know how to prevent it."

"It would have made no difference. Indeed, indeed, Mr. Saul, nothing of that kind could have made a difference."

"It wouldn't have changed anything. Seriously, Mr. Saul, nothing like that could have made a difference."

"Will you grant me this;—that I may speak to you again on the same subject after six months?"

"Will you give me this;—that I can talk to you again about the same topic in six months?"

"It cannot do any good."

"It won't do any good."

"It will do this good;—that for so much time you will have had the idea before you." Fanny thought that she would have Mr. Saul himself before her, and that that would be enough. Mr. Saul, with his rusty clothes and his thick, dirty shoes, and his weak, blinking eyes, and his mind always set upon the one wish of his life, could not be made to present himself to her in the guise of a lover. He was one of those men of whom women become very fond with the fondness of friendship, but from whom young women seem to be as far removed in the way of love as though they belonged to some other species. "I will not press you further," said he, "as I gather by your tone that it distresses you."

"It will do you good;—you will have had the idea in front of you for some time." Fanny thought she would have Mr. Saul right in front of her, and that would be enough. Mr. Saul, with his worn-out clothes, thick, muddy shoes, weak, blinking eyes, and his mind always focused on his one lifelong wish, couldn't present himself to her in the form of a lover. He was one of those men whom women grow very fond of with the kind of affection that comes from friendship, but young women seem to be as far from loving him as if he were from a different species. "I won't push you further," he said, "since I can tell by your tone that it's upsetting you."

"I am so sorry if I distress you, but really, Mr. Saul, I could give you,—I never could give you any other answer."

"I’m really sorry if I upset you, but honestly, Mr. Saul, I could give you—I could never give you any other answer."

Then they walked on silently through the rain,—silently, without a single word,—for more than half a mile, till they reached the rectory gate. Here it was necessary that they should, at any rate, speak to each other, and for the last three hundred yards Fanny had been trying to find the words which would be suitable. But he was the first to break the silence. "Good-night, Miss Clavering," he said, stopping and putting out his hand.

Then they walked on quietly through the rain—quietly, without saying a word—for more than half a mile, until they reached the rectory gate. Here, it was essential for them to talk to each other, and for the last three hundred yards, Fanny had been trying to find the right words. But he was the first to break the silence. "Good night, Miss Clavering," he said, stopping and extending his hand.

"Good-night, Mr. Saul."

"Goodnight, Mr. Saul."

"I hope that there may be no difference in our bearing to each other, because of what I have to-day said to you?"

"I hope that our attitude towards each other doesn't change because of what I said to you today."

"Not on my part;—that is, if you will forget it."

"Not from me;—that is, if you can let it go."

"No, Miss Clavering; I shall not forget it. If it had been a thing to be forgotten, I should not have spoken. I certainly shall not forget it."

"No, Miss Clavering; I won’t forget it. If it was something I could forget, I wouldn’t have mentioned it. I definitely won’t forget it."

"You know what I mean, Mr. Saul."

"You get what I'm saying, Mr. Saul."

"I shall not forget it even in the way that you mean. But still I think you need not fear me, because you know that I love you. I think I can promise that you need not withdraw yourself from me, because of what has passed. But you will tell your father and your mother, and of course will be guided by them. And now, good-night." Then he went, and she was astonished at finding that he had had much the best of it in his manner of speaking and conducting himself. She had refused him very curtly, and he had borne it well. He had not been abashed, nor had he become sulky, nor had he tried to melt her by mention of his own misery. In truth he had done it very well,—only that he should have known better than to make any such attempt at all.

"I won't forget it, not in the way you mean. But I don't think you need to worry about me because you know I love you. I can promise you don't need to distance yourself from me because of what has happened. But you will tell your dad and mom, and of course, you'll listen to their advice. And now, good night." Then he left, and she was surprised to realize that he had handled the conversation much better than she had. She had rejected him pretty abruptly, and he had taken it gracefully. He hadn’t looked embarrassed, sulked, or tried to win her over by talking about his own sadness. Honestly, he had managed it quite well—except he should have known better than to make any attempt at all.

Mr. Saul had been right in one thing. Of course she told her mother, and of course her mother told her father. Before dinner that evening the whole affair was being debated in the family conclave. They all agreed that Fanny had had no alternative but to reject the proposition at once. That, indeed, was so thoroughly taken for granted, that the point was not discussed. But there came to be a difference between the Rector and Fanny on one side, and Mrs. Clavering and Mary on the other. "Upon my word," said the Rector, "I think it was very impertinent." Fanny would not have liked to use that word herself, but she loved her father for using it.

Mr. Saul was right about one thing. Of course she told her mother, and of course her mother told her father. Before dinner that evening, the whole situation was being discussed in the family meeting. They all agreed that Fanny had no choice but to reject the proposal immediately. That was so clearly understood that they didn't even discuss it. However, there was a disagreement between the Rector and Fanny on one side, and Mrs. Clavering and Mary on the other. "Honestly," said the Rector, "I think it was really rude." Fanny wouldn’t have used that word herself, but she appreciated her father for saying it.

"I do not see that," said Mrs. Clavering. "He could not know what Fanny's views in life might be. Curates very often marry out of the houses of the clergymen with whom they are placed, and I do not see why Mr. Saul should be debarred from the privilege of trying."

"I don't see that," said Mrs. Clavering. "He couldn't possibly know what Fanny's outlook on life is. Curates often marry from the homes of the clergymen they work with, and I don't see why Mr. Saul should be denied the chance to try."

"If he had got to like Fanny what else was he to do?" said Mary.

"Since he had started to like Fanny, what else could he do?" said Mary.

"Oh, Mary, don't talk such nonsense," said Fanny. "Got to like! People shouldn't get to like people unless there's some reason for it."

"Oh, Mary, don't talk like that," said Fanny. "You have to have a reason to like someone! People shouldn't just like each other for no reason."

"What on earth did he intend to live on?" demanded the Rector.

"What on earth did he plan to live on?" asked the Rector.

"Edward had nothing to live on, when you first allowed him to come here," said Mary.

"Edward had nothing to rely on when you first let him come here," said Mary.

"But Edward had prospects, and Saul, as far as I know, has none. He had given no one the slightest notice. If the man in the moon had come to Fanny I don't suppose she would have been more surprised."

"But Edward had opportunities, and Saul, as far as I know, has none. He hadn't informed anyone at all. If the man in the moon had appeared to Fanny, I doubt she would have been more shocked."

"Not half so much, papa."

"Not nearly as much, dad."

Then it was that Mrs. Clavering had declared that she was not surprised,—that she had suspected it, and had almost made Fanny angry by saying so. When Harry came back two days afterwards, the family news was imparted to him, and he immediately ranged himself on his father's side. "Upon my word I think that he ought to be forbidden the house," said Harry. "He has forgotten himself in making such a proposition."

Then Mrs. Clavering said she wasn’t surprised; she had suspected it and had almost upset Fanny by mentioning it. When Harry returned two days later, he was told the family news, and he immediately took his father’s side. “Honestly, I think he should be banned from the house,” Harry said. “He has lost all sense by making such a suggestion.”

"That's nonsense, Harry," said his mother. "If he can be comfortable coming here, there can be no reason why he should be uncomfortable. It would be an injustice to him to ask him to go, and a great trouble to your father to find another curate that would suit him so well." There could be no doubt whatever as to the latter proposition, and therefore it was quietly argued that Mr. Saul's fault, if there had been a fault, should be condoned. On the next day he came to the rectory, and they were all astonished at the ease with which he bore himself. It was not that he affected any special freedom of manner, or that he altogether avoided any change in his mode of speaking to them. A slight blush came upon his sallow face as he first spoke to Mrs. Clavering, and he hardly did more than say a single word to Fanny. But he carried himself as though conscious of what he had done, but in no degree ashamed of the doing it. The Rector's manner to him was stiff and formal;—seeing which Mrs. Clavering spoke to him gently, and with a smile. "I saw you were a little hard on him, and therefore I tried to make up for it," said she afterwards. "You were quite right," said the husband. "You always are. But I wish he had not made such a fool of himself. It will never be the same thing with him again." Harry hardly spoke to Mr. Saul the first time he met him, all of which Mr. Saul understood perfectly.

"That's nonsense, Harry," his mother said. "If he can feel comfortable coming here, there’s no reason for him to feel uncomfortable. It would be unfair to ask him to leave, and it would be a big hassle for your father to find another curate who fits so well." There was no doubt about the latter point, so it was decided that if Mr. Saul had made a mistake, it should be overlooked. The next day, he came to the rectory, and everyone was surprised by how at ease he seemed. It wasn't that he acted overly casual or completely changed the way he spoke to them. A slight blush appeared on his pale face when he first addressed Mrs. Clavering, and he barely said more than a single word to Fanny. But he carried himself as if he was aware of what he'd done, yet not ashamed of it at all. The Rector's demeanor toward him was stiff and formal; noticing this, Mrs. Clavering spoke to him kindly, with a smile. "I noticed you were a bit harsh with him, so I tried to make up for it," she said afterward. "You were completely right," her husband replied. "You always are. But I wish he hadn’t embarrassed himself like that. Things will never be the same for him again." Harry barely spoke to Mr. Saul the first time they met, and Mr. Saul understood that perfectly.

"Clavering," he said to Harry, a day or two after this, "I hope there is to be no difference between you and me."

"Clavering," he said to Harry a day or two later, "I hope there won't be any disagreement between us."

"Difference! I don't know what you mean by difference."

"Difference! I don't understand what you mean by difference."

"We were good friends, and I hope that we are to remain so. No doubt you know what has taken place between me and your sister."

"We were good friends, and I hope we will stay that way. You probably know what happened between me and your sister."

"Oh, yes;—I have been told, of course."

"Oh, yes; I've heard, of course."

"What I mean is, that I hope you are not going to quarrel with me on that account? What I did, is it not what you would have done in my position?—only you would have done it successfully?"

"What I mean is, I hope you’re not going to argue with me about that? What I did, isn’t it what you would have done if you were in my shoes?—only you would have done it successfully?"

"I think a fellow should have some income, you know."

"I think a guy should have some income, you know."

"Can you say that you would have waited for income before you spoke of marriage?"

"Can you honestly say you would have waited for money before talking about getting married?"

"I think it might have been better that you should have gone to my father."

"I think it would have been better if you had gone to my dad."

"It may be that that is the rule in such things, but if so I do not know it. Would she have liked that better?"

"It might be that this is the way things work, but if that's the case, I’m not aware of it. Would she have preferred that?"

"Well;—I can't say."

"Well, I can't say."

"You are engaged? Did you go to the young lady's family first?"

"You’re engaged? Did you talk to the young lady’s family first?"

"I can't say I did; but I think I had given them some ground to expect it. I fancy they all knew what I was about. But it's over now, and I don't know that we need say anything more about it."

"I can’t say I did; but I think I gave them some reason to expect it. I think they all knew what I was up to. But it’s over now, and I don’t think we need to talk about it anymore."

"Certainly not. Nothing can be said that would be of any use; but I do not think I have done anything that you should resent."

"Definitely not. There's nothing I can say that would really help; however, I don’t believe I've done anything that you should be upset about."

"Resent is a strong word. I don't resent it, or, at any rate, I won't; and there may be an end of it." After this, Harry was more gracious with Mr. Saul, having an idea that the curate had made some sort of apology for what he had done. But that, I fancy, was by no means Mr. Saul's view of the case. Had he offered to marry the daughter of the Archbishop of Canterbury, instead of the daughter of the Rector of Clavering, he would not have imagined that his doing so needed an apology.

"Resent is a strong word. I don't hold any resentment, or at least I won't; and that should be the end of it." After this, Harry treated Mr. Saul more kindly, thinking that the curate had somehow apologized for his actions. But I believe that was definitely not how Mr. Saul saw it. If he had proposed to marry the daughter of the Archbishop of Canterbury instead of the daughter of the Rector of Clavering, he wouldn't have thought he needed to apologize for it.

The day after his return from London Lady Clavering sent for Harry up to the house. "So you saw my sister in London?" she said.

The day after he got back from London, Lady Clavering called for Harry to come to the house. "So you saw my sister in London?" she asked.

"Yes," said Harry blushing; "as I was in town, I thought that I might as well meet her. But, as you said, Lady Ongar is able to do without much assistance of that kind. I only just saw her."

"Yeah," said Harry, blushing; "since I was in town, I figured I might as well meet her. But, like you said, Lady Ongar can manage without much help like that. I just saw her for a moment."

"Julia took it so kindly of you; but she seems surprised that you did not come to her the following day. She thought you would have called."

"Julia appreciated it so much; but she seems surprised that you didn't come to see her the next day. She expected you would have called."

"Oh, dear, no. I fancied that she would be too tired and too busy to wish to see any mere acquaintance."

"Oh, no. I thought she would be too tired and too busy to want to see any casual acquaintance."

"Ah, Harry, I see that she has angered you," said Lady Clavering; "otherwise you would not talk about mere acquaintance."

"Ah, Harry, I can tell that she has upset you," said Lady Clavering; "otherwise you wouldn't be discussing just an acquaintance."

"Not in the least. Angered me! How could she anger me? What I meant was that at such a time she would probably wish to see no one but people on business,—unless it was some one near to her, like yourself or Hugh."

"Not at all. She made me angry! How could she make me angry? What I meant was that at a time like this, she would probably want to see no one but people on business—unless it was someone close to her, like you or Hugh."

"Hugh will not go to her."

"Hugh isn't going to her."

"But you will do so; will you not?"

"But you will, okay?"

"Before long I will. You don't seem to understand, Harry,—and, perhaps, it would be odd if you did,—that I can't run up to town and back as I please. I ought not to tell you this, I dare say, but one feels as though one wanted to talk to some one about one's affairs. At the present moment, I have not the money to go,—even if there were no other reason." These last words she said almost in a whisper, and then she looked up into the young man's face, to see what he thought of the communication she had made him.

"Before long I will. You don't seem to get it, Harry—and maybe it's strange that you would— but I can't just run to the city and back whenever I want. I probably shouldn't tell you this, but I feel like I need to talk to someone about my situation. Right now, I don't have the money to go—even without any other reasons." She said the last part almost in a whisper and then looked up at the young man's face to see how he felt about what she had just shared.

"Oh, money!" he said. "You could soon get money. But I hope it won't be long before you go."

"Oh, money!" he said. "You could easily get money. But I hope it won't be long before you leave."

On the next morning but one a letter came by the post for him from Lady Ongar. When he saw the handwriting, which he knew, his heart was at once in his mouth, and he hesitated to open his letter at the breakfast-table. He did open it and read it, but, in truth, he hardly understood it or digested it till he had taken it away with him up to his own room. The letter, which was very short, was as follows:—
 

On the morning after next, he received a letter from Lady Ongar in the mail. Recognizing her handwriting immediately made his heart race, and he hesitated to open the letter at the breakfast table. He did open it and read it, but honestly, he barely understood or processed it until he took it with him up to his room. The letter, which was very brief, was as follows:—

Dear Friend,

Dear Friend,

I felt your kindness in coming to me at the station so much!—the more, perhaps, because others, who owed me more kindness, have paid me less. Don't suppose that I allude to poor Hermione, for, in truth, I have no intention to complain of her. I thought, perhaps, you would have come to see me before you left London; but I suppose you were hurried. I hear from Clavering that you are to be up about your new profession in a day or two. Pray come and see me before you have been many days in London. I shall have so much to say to you! The rooms you have taken are everything that I wanted, and I am so grateful!

I really appreciated your kindness in coming to the station to see me! Maybe even more so because others, who should’ve been more caring, have been less so. Don't think I'm talking about poor Hermione, because honestly, I don’t mean to complain about her. I thought you might visit me before leaving London, but I guess you were busy. I heard from Clavering that you’ll be starting your new job in a day or two. Please come and see me before you've been in London too long. I have so much to tell you! The place you got is exactly what I wanted, and I’m really thankful!

Yours ever,

Yours ever,

J. O.
 

J. O.

When Harry had read and had digested this, he became aware that he was again fluttered. "Poor creature!" he said to himself; "it is sad to think how much she is in want of a friend."

When Harry finished reading and processing this, he realized that he felt anxious again. "Poor thing!" he thought to himself; "it’s unfortunate how much she needs a friend."

 

 

CHAPTER VII.

SOME SCENES IN THE LIFE OF A COUNTESS.

About the middle of January Harry Clavering went up to London, and settled himself to work at Mr. Beilby's office. Mr. Beilby's office consisted of four or five large chambers, overlooking the river from the bottom of Adam Street in the Adelphi, and here Harry found a table for himself in the same apartment with three other pupils. It was a fine old room, lofty, and with large windows, ornamented on the ceiling with Italian scrollwork, and a flying goddess in the centre. In days gone by the house had been the habitation of some great rich man, who had there enjoyed the sweet breezes from the river before London had become the London of the present days, and when no embankment had been needed for the Thames. Nothing could be nicer than this room, or more pleasant than the table and seat which he was to occupy near a window; but there was something in the tone of the other men towards him which did not quite satisfy him. They probably did not know that he was a fellow of a college, and treated him almost as they might have done had he come to them direct from King's College, in the Strand, or from the London University. Down at Stratton, a certain amount of honour had been paid to him. They had known there who he was, and had felt some deference for him. They had not slapped him on the back, or poked him in the ribs, or even called him old fellow, before some length of acquaintance justified such appellation. But up at Mr. Beilby's, in the Adelphi, one young man, who was certainly his junior in age, and who did not seem as yet to have attained any high position in the science of engineering, manifestly thought that he was acting in a friendly and becoming way by declaring the stranger to be a lad of wax on the second day of his appearance. Harry Clavering was not disinclined to believe that he was a "lad of wax," or "a brick," or "a trump," or "no small beer." But he desired that such complimentary and endearing appellations should be used to him only by those who had known him long enough to be aware that he deserved them. Mr. Joseph Walliker certainly was not as yet among this number.

AIn the middle of January, Harry Clavering headed to London and settled into work at Mr. Beilby's office. Mr. Beilby's office had four or five large rooms overlooking the river from the bottom of Adam Street in the Adelphi, and here Harry found a desk for himself in the same room with three other students. It was a beautiful, spacious room with big windows, decorated with Italian scrollwork on the ceiling and a flying goddess in the center. In the past, this place had belonged to a wealthy man who enjoyed the cool breezes from the river before London turned into what it is today, back when an embankment wasn’t necessary for the Thames. The room was just perfect, and the desk and chair near the window were comfortable; however, there was something about how the others treated him that didn’t sit right with him. They probably didn’t realize he was a college fellow and interacted with him as if he had just arrived from King’s College in the Strand or the London University. Back at Stratton, he’d received a certain level of respect. People there knew who he was and showed him some deference. They hadn’t slapped him on the back, poked him in the ribs, or called him “old fellow” until a suitable amount of time had passed to justify such familiarity. But up at Mr. Beilby's in the Adelphi, one younger guy, who was certainly younger than him and didn’t seem to have reached any notable status in engineering yet, clearly thought he was being friendly and polite by calling the newcomer a "lad of wax" on his second day there. Harry Clavering wasn’t against being called a "lad of wax," or "a brick," or "a trump," or "no small beer." But he wished that such flattering and affectionate terms were reserved for those who had known him long enough to understand that he actually merited them. Mr. Joseph Walliker was definitely not yet among that group.

There was a man at Mr. Beilby's who was entitled to greet him with endearing terms, and to be so greeted himself, although Harry had never seen him till he attended for the first time at the Adelphi. This was Theodore Burton, his future brother-in-law, who was now the leading man in the London house;—the leading man as regarded business, though he was not as yet a partner. It was understood that this Mr. Burton was to come in when his father went out; and in the meantime he received a salary of a thousand a year as managing clerk. A very hard-working, steady, intelligent man was Mr. Theodore Burton, with a bald head, a high forehead, and that look of constant work about him which such men obtain. Harry Clavering could not bring himself to take a liking to him, because he wore cotton gloves and had an odious habit of dusting his shoes with his pocket-handkerchief. Twice Harry saw him do this on the first day of their acquaintance, and he regretted it exceedingly. The cotton gloves too were offensive, as were also the thick shoes which had been dusted; but the dusting was the great sin.

There was a guy at Mr. Beilby's who could greet him with affectionate terms, and be greeted that way in return, even though Harry had never seen him until he first showed up at the Adelphi. This was Theodore Burton, his future brother-in-law, who was now the top guy in the London office; the head honcho when it came to business, even though he wasn’t a partner yet. It was generally accepted that Mr. Burton would step in when his father left; meanwhile, he earned a salary of a thousand a year as the managing clerk. Mr. Theodore Burton was a hardworking, steady, and smart man, with a bald head, a high forehead, and that constant work vibe that such men tend to have. Harry Clavering couldn't bring himself to like him because he wore cotton gloves and had this annoying habit of dusting his shoes with his pocket handkerchief. Twice, Harry saw him do this on their first day together, and he found it really off-putting. The cotton gloves were irritating, as were the thick shoes that had been dusted, but the dusting itself was the worst part.

And there was something which did not quite please Harry in Mr. Theodore Burton's manner, though the gentleman had manifestly intended to be very kind to him. When Burton had been speaking to him for a minute or two, it flashed across Harry's mind that he had not bound himself to marry the whole Burton family, and that, perhaps, he must take some means to let that fact be known. "Theodore," as he had so often heard the younger Mr. Burton called by loving lips, seemed to claim him as his own, called him Harry, and upbraided him with friendly warmth for not having come direct to his,—Mr. Burton's,—house in Onslow Crescent. "Pray feel yourself at home there," said Mr. Burton. "I hope you'll like my wife. You needn't be afraid of being made to be idle if you spend your evenings there, for we are all reading people. Will you come and dine to-day?" Florence had told him that she was her brother Theodore's favourite sister, and that Theodore as a husband and a brother, and a man, was perfect. But Theodore had dusted his boots with his handkerchief, and Harry Clavering would not dine with him on that day.

And there was something that didn’t quite sit right with Harry about Mr. Theodore Burton’s way of speaking, even though the man clearly meant to be very kind to him. As Burton chatted with him for a minute or two, it struck Harry that he wasn’t obligated to marry the entire Burton family, and he should probably find a way to make that clear. “Theodore,” as he had often heard the younger Mr. Burton referred to in affectionate tones, seemed to claim him as his own, called him Harry, and jokingly chided him for not coming straight to his—Mr. Burton’s—house on Onslow Crescent. “Please make yourself at home there,” said Mr. Burton. “I hope you’ll like my wife. You don’t have to worry about being bored if you spend your evenings with us because we’re all big readers. Will you come over for dinner today?” Florence had mentioned that she was her brother Theodore’s favorite sister and that Theodore was perfect as a husband, brother, and man. But Theodore had dusted off his boots with his handkerchief, and Harry Clavering would not be having dinner with him that day.

And then it was painfully manifest to him that every one in the office knew his destiny with reference to old Burton's daughter. He had been one of the Stratton men, and no more than any other had he gone unscathed through the Stratton fire. He had been made to do the regular thing, as Granger, Scarness, and others had done it. Stratton would be safer ground now, as Clavering had taken the last. That was the feeling on the matter which seemed to belong to others. It was not that Harry thought in this way of his own Florence. He knew well enough what a lucky fellow he was to have won such a girl. He was well aware how widely his Florence differed from Carry Scarness. He denied to himself indignantly that he had any notion of repenting what he had done. But he did wish that these private matters might have remained private, and that all the men at Beilby's had not known of his engagement. When Walliker, on the fourth day of their acquaintance, asked him if it was all right at Stratton, he made up his mind that he hated Walliker, and that he would hate Walliker to the last day of his life. He had declined the first invitation given to him by Theodore Burton; but he could not altogether avoid his future brother-in-law, and had agreed to dine with him on this day.

And then it became painfully clear to him that everyone in the office was aware of his fate regarding old Burton's daughter. He had been one of the Stratton guys, and like everyone else, he hadn't come through the Stratton fire unscathed. He had been made to follow the usual path, just like Granger, Scarness, and the others. Now, Stratton would be safer ground since Clavering had taken the last. That sentiment seemed to belong to others. It wasn't that Harry had those thoughts about his own Florence. He knew very well how lucky he was to have won such a girl. He recognized just how different his Florence was from Carry Scarness. He indignantly denied to himself that he regretted what he had done. But he did wish that these personal matters could have stayed private, and that everyone at Beilby's didn't know about his engagement. When Walliker, on the fourth day of their acquaintance, asked him if everything was okay at Stratton, he decided he hated Walliker and would continue to hate him for the rest of his life. He had turned down the first invitation he received from Theodore Burton, but he couldn't completely avoid his future brother-in-law and had agreed to have dinner with him that day.

On that same afternoon Harry, when he left Mr. Beilby's office, went direct to Bolton Street, that he might call on Lady Ongar. As he went thither he bethought himself that these Wallikers and the like had had no such events in life as had befallen him! They laughed at him about Florence Burton, little guessing that it had been his lot to love, and to be loved by such a one as Julia Brabazon had been,—such a one as Lady Ongar now was. But things had gone well with him. Julia Brabazon could have made no man happy, but Florence Burton would be the sweetest, dearest, truest little wife that ever man took to his home. He was thinking of this, and determined to think of it more and more daily, as he knocked at Lady Ongar's door. "Yes; her ladyship was at home," said the servant whom he had seen on the railway platform; and in a few moments' time he found himself in the drawing-room which he had criticized so carefully when he was taking it for its present occupant.

On that same afternoon, Harry, after leaving Mr. Beilby's office, headed straight to Bolton Street to visit Lady Ongar. As he was on his way, he realized that people like the Wallikers hadn’t experienced the events that he had! They joked about his interest in Florence Burton, not knowing that he had loved and been loved by someone like Julia Brabazon—just like Lady Ongar now. But things had worked out for him. Julia Brabazon wouldn't have made any man truly happy, but Florence Burton would be the sweetest, dearest, and most genuine wife anyone could bring home. He was thinking about this and decided to keep thinking about it more each day as he knocked on Lady Ongar's door. "Yes; her ladyship is at home," said the servant he had seen at the railway platform, and in just a few moments, he found himself in the drawing-room that he had previously scrutinized so carefully when he thought about its current occupant.

He was left in the room for five or six minutes, and was able to make a full mental inventory of its contents. It was very different in its present aspect from the room which he had seen not yet a month since. She had told him that the apartments had been all that she desired; but since then everything had been altered, at least in appearance. A new piano had been brought in, and the chintz on the furniture was surely new. And the room was crowded with small feminine belongings, indicative of wealth and luxury. There were ornaments about, and pretty toys, and a thousand knickknacks which none but the rich can possess, and which none can possess even among the rich unless they can give taste as well as money to their acquisition. Then he heard a light step; the door opened, and Lady Ongar was there.

He was left in the room for five or six minutes and was able to take a complete mental inventory of what was inside. It looked very different now from the room he had seen less than a month ago. She had told him that the apartments were everything she wanted, but since then, everything had changed, at least in appearance. A new piano had been brought in, and the fabric on the furniture was definitely new. The room was filled with small feminine items, showing wealth and luxury. There were decorations, pretty toys, and countless knickknacks that only the rich can have, and which only those with both taste and money can acquire. Then he heard a light step; the door opened, and Lady Ongar was there.

He expected to see the same figure that he had seen on the railway platform, the same gloomy drapery, the same quiet, almost deathlike demeanour, nay, almost the same veil over her features; but the Lady Ongar whom he now saw was as unlike that Lady Ongar as she was unlike that Julia Brabazon whom he had known in old days at Clavering Park. She was dressed, no doubt, in black; nay, no doubt, she was dressed in weeds; but in spite of the black and in spite of the weeds there was nothing about her of the weariness or of the solemnity of woe. He hardly saw that her dress was made of crape, or that long white pendants were hanging down from the cap which sat so prettily upon her head. But it was her face at which he gazed. At first he thought that she could hardly be the same woman, she was to his eyes so much older than she had been! And yet as he looked at her, he found that she was as handsome as ever,—more handsome than she had ever been before. There was a dignity about her face and figure which became her well, and which she carried as though she knew herself to be in very truth a countess. It was a face which bore well such signs of age as those which had come upon it. She seemed to be a woman fitter for womanhood than for girlhood. Her eyes were brighter than of yore, and, as Harry thought, larger; and her high forehead and noble stamp of countenance seemed fitted for the dress and headgear which she wore.

He expected to see the same person he had seen on the train platform—the same gloomy attire, the same quiet, almost lifeless demeanor, even the same veil covering her face. But the Lady Ongar he saw now was nothing like the Lady Ongar from before, nor was she anything like the Julia Brabazon he’d known back in the day at Clavering Park. She was definitely dressed in black; in fact, she was in mourning attire. However, despite the black clothing and mourning, she didn’t show any signs of fatigue or deep sorrow. He hardly noticed that her dress was made of crape or that long white ribbons hung down from the cap sitting so nicely on her head. But it was her face that captured his attention. At first, he thought she could hardly be the same woman; to his eyes, she seemed so much older! Yet, as he looked closer, he realized she was just as beautiful as ever—more beautiful than she had ever been. There was a dignity in her face and figure that suited her perfectly, and it was clear she carried herself knowing she truly was a countess. Her face showed signs of age, but it wore them well. She seemed more suited for womanhood than for girlhood. Her eyes were brighter than before, and, as Harry thought, larger; her high forehead and noble features suited the outfit and headpiece she wore.

"I have been expecting you," said she, stepping up to him. "Hermione wrote me word that you were to come up on Monday. Why did you not come sooner?" There was a smile on her face as she spoke, and a confidence in her tone which almost confounded him.

"I've been expecting you," she said, stepping up to him. "Hermione told me you'd be coming on Monday. Why didn't you come earlier?" There was a smile on her face as she spoke, and a confidence in her tone that nearly threw him off guard.

"I have had so many things to do," said he lamely.

"I've had so much to do," he said weakly.

"About your new profession. Yes, I can understand that. And so you are settled in London now? Where are you living;—that is, if you are settled yet?" In answer to this, Harry told her that he had taken lodgings in Bloomsbury Square, blushing somewhat as he named so unfashionable a locality. Old Mrs. Burton had recommended him to the house in which he was located, but he did not find it necessary to explain that fact to Lady Ongar.

"About your new job. Yes, I get that. So, are you settled in London now? Where are you living?—that is, if you've settled in yet?" In response to this, Harry told her that he had gotten a place in Bloomsbury Square, feeling a bit embarrassed as he mentioned such an unfashionable area. Old Mrs. Burton had recommended the house where he was staying, but he didn’t feel it was necessary to explain that to Lady Ongar.

"I have to thank you for what you did for me," continued she. "You ran away from me in such a hurry on that night that I was unable to speak to you. But to tell the truth, Harry, I was in no mood then to speak to any one. Of course you thought that I treated you ill."

"I have to thank you for what you did for me," she continued. "You ran away from me so quickly that night that I couldn't talk to you. But honestly, Harry, I wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone then. Of course, you probably thought I treated you badly."

"Oh, no," said he.

"Oh, no," he said.

"Of course you did. If I thought you did not, I should be angry with you now. But had it been to save my life I could not have helped it. Why did not Sir Hugh Clavering come to meet me? Why did not my sister's husband come to me?" To this question Harry could make no answer. He was still standing with his hat in his hand, and now turned his face away from her and shook his head.

"Of course you did. If I thought you didn't, I would be upset with you right now. But even if it were to save my life, I couldn't have prevented it. Why didn't Sir Hugh Clavering come to meet me? Why didn't my sister's husband come to see me?" To this question, Harry had no response. He was still standing there with his hat in his hand, and now he turned his face away from her and shook his head.

"Sit down, Harry," she said, "and let me talk to you like a friend;—unless you are in a hurry to go away."

"Sit down, Harry," she said, "and let me talk to you like a friend; unless you’re in a rush to leave."

"Oh, no," said he, seating himself.

"Oh, no," he said, sitting down.

"Or unless you, too, are afraid of me."

"Or unless you're scared of me, too."

"Afraid of you, Lady Ongar?"

"Scared of you, Lady Ongar?"

"Yes, afraid; but I don't mean you. I don't believe that you are coward enough to desert a woman who was once your friend because misfortune has overtaken her, and calumny has been at work with her name."

"Yes, I'm scared; but I'm not talking about you. I don't think you're cowardly enough to abandon a woman who was once your friend just because she's had some bad luck and rumors have been spread about her."

"I hope not," said he.

"I hope not," he said.

"No, Harry; I do not think it of you. But if Sir Hugh be not a coward, why did he not come and meet me? Why has he left me to stand alone, now that he could be of service to me? I knew that money was his god, but I have never asked him for a shilling and should not have done so now. Oh, Harry, how wicked you were about that cheque! Do you remember?"

"No, Harry; I don’t think that about you. But if Sir Hugh isn’t a coward, why didn’t he come and meet me? Why has he left me to face this alone when he could have helped me? I knew that money was everything to him, but I’ve never asked him for a penny and wouldn’t have done so now. Oh, Harry, how terrible you were about that check! Do you remember?"

"Yes; I remember."

"Yeah, I remember."

"So shall I; always, always. If I had taken that money how often should I have heard of it since?"

"So will I; always, always. If I had taken that money, how often would I have heard about it since?"

"Heard of it?" he asked. "Do you mean from me?"

"Heard of it?" he asked. "Are you talking about me?"

"Yes; how often from you? Would you have dunned me, and told me of it once a week? Upon my word, Harry, I was told of it more nearly every day. Is it not wonderful that men should be so mean?"

"Yeah; how often did it come from you? Would you have nagged me and reminded me about it once a week? Seriously, Harry, I heard about it almost every day. Isn't it crazy that people can be so petty?"

It was clear to him now that she was talking of her husband who was dead, and on that subject he felt himself at present unable to speak a word. He little dreamed at that moment how openly she would soon speak to him of Lord Ongar and of Lord Ongar's faults!

It was obvious to him now that she was referring to her late husband, and on that topic, he felt completely unable to say a word. He had no idea at that moment how openly she would soon discuss Lord Ongar and his flaws!

"Oh, how I have wished that I had taken your money! But never mind about that now, Harry. Wretched as such taunts were, they soon became a small thing. But it has been cowardly in your cousin, Hugh; has it not? If I had not lived with him as one of his family, it would not have mattered. People would not have expected it. It was as though my own brother had cast me forth."

"Oh, how I've wished I had taken your money! But let's not dwell on that now, Harry. As awful as those insults were, they soon didn't seem like such a big deal. But it was cowardly of your cousin, Hugh; wouldn't you agree? If I hadn't lived with him like one of the family, it wouldn’t have mattered. People wouldn't have expected it. It felt like my own brother had thrown me out."

"Lady Clavering has been with you; has she not?"

"Lady Clavering has been with you, right?"

"Once, for half-an-hour. She came up for one day, and came here by herself, cowering as though she were afraid of me. Poor Hermy! She has not a good time of it either. You lords of creation lead your slaves sad lives when it pleases you to change your billing and cooing for matter-of-fact masterdom and rule. I don't blame Hermy. I suppose she did all she could, and I did not utter one word of reproach of her. Nor should I to him. Indeed, if he came now the servant would deny me to him. He has insulted me, and I shall remember the insult."

"Once, for half an hour. She came up for one day and came here alone, acting like she was scared of me. Poor Hermy! She hasn’t had it easy either. You guys in charge lead your partners to sad lives when you suddenly switch from being affectionate to dominating and controlling. I don’t blame Hermy. I assume she did her best, and I didn’t say a single word of blame to her. Nor should I to him. Honestly, if he showed up now, the servant would say I’m not available. He’s insulted me, and I will remember that insult."

Harry Clavering did not clearly understand what it was that Lady Ongar had desired of her brother-in-law,—what aid she had required; nor did he know whether it would be fitting for him to offer to act in Sir Hugh's place. Anything that he could do, he felt himself at that moment willing to do, even though the necessary service should demand some sacrifice greater than prudence could approve. "If I had thought that anything was wanted, I should have come to you sooner," said he.

Harry Clavering didn’t fully grasp what Lady Ongar needed from her brother-in-law—what support she was looking for; nor did he know if it would be appropriate for him to step in for Sir Hugh. He felt ready to do anything he could at that moment, even if it meant making a sacrifice that was beyond what would be considered sensible. "If I had known anything was needed, I would have come to you sooner," he said.

"Everything is wanted, Harry. Everything is wanted;—except that cheque for six hundred pounds which you sent me so treacherously. Did you ever think what might have happened if a certain person had heard of that? All the world would have declared that you had done it for your own private purposes;—all the world, except one."

"Everything is wanted, Harry. Everything is wanted—except that check for six hundred pounds that you sent me so deceitfully. Did you ever think about what could have happened if a certain person had found out about that? The whole world would have said that you did it for your own personal gain—everyone, except one."

Harry, as he heard this, felt that he was blushing. Did Lady Ongar know of his engagement with Florence Burton? Lady Clavering knew it, and might probably have told the tidings; but then, again, she might not have told them. Harry at this moment wished that he knew how it was. All that Lady Ongar said to him would come with so different a meaning according as she did, or did not know that fact. But he had no mind to tell her of the fact himself. He declared to himself that he hoped she knew it, as it would serve to make them both more comfortable together; but he did not think that it would do for him to bring forward the subject, neck and heels as it were. The proper thing would be that she should congratulate him, but this she did not do. "I certainly meant no ill," he said, in answer to the last words she had spoken.

Harry, as he heard this, felt himself blushing. Did Lady Ongar know about his engagement to Florence Burton? Lady Clavering was aware, and she might have shared the news; but then again, she might not have. At that moment, Harry wished he could figure it out. Everything Lady Ongar said to him would mean so much differently depending on whether she knew that fact or not. But he had no intention of bringing it up himself. He told himself he hoped she knew, as it would make things more comfortable for both of them; but he didn’t think it was right for him to bring up the topic directly. Ideally, she would congratulate him, but she didn’t. "I certainly meant no harm," he said in response to her last words.

"You have never meant ill to me, Harry; though you know you have abused me dreadfully before now. I daresay you forget the hard names you have called me. You men do forget such things."

"You've never intended to hurt me, Harry; although you know you've treated me terribly in the past. I bet you've forgotten the awful names you've called me. You guys tend to forget those things."

"I remember calling you one name."

"I remember calling you one name."

"Do not repeat it now, if you please. If I deserved it, it would shame me; and if I did not, it should shame you."

"Please don't say that again. If I deserve it, it would embarrass me; and if I don't, it should embarrass you."

"No; I will not repeat it."

"No, I won’t say it again."

"Does it not seem odd, Harry, that you and I should be sitting, talking together in this way?" She was leaning now towards him, across the table, and one hand was raised to her forehead while her eyes were fixed intently upon his. The attitude was one which he felt to express extreme intimacy. She would not have sat in that way, pressing back her hair from her brow, with all appearance of widowhood banished from her face, in the presence of any but a dear and close friend. He did not think of this, but he felt that it was so, almost by instinct. "I have such a tale to tell you," she said; "such a tale!"

"Doesn't it seem strange, Harry, that you and I are sitting here, talking like this?" She leaned closer to him across the table, one hand raised to her forehead while her eyes were locked onto his. He felt that her posture conveyed a deep sense of intimacy. She wouldn’t have sat that way, brushing her hair from her brow, looking free of any signs of widowhood, in front of anyone except a dear and close friend. He didn’t consciously think about it, but he felt it to be true, almost instinctively. "I have such a story to tell you," she said; "such a story!"

A friendly talk.
A friendly chat.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

Why should she tell it to him? Of course he asked himself this question. Then he remembered that she had no brother,—remembered also that her brother-in-law had deserted her, and he declared to himself that, if necessary, he would be her brother. "I fear that you have not been happy," said he, "since I saw you last."

Why should she tell him? Of course, he asked himself this question. Then he remembered that she had no brother—also remembered that her brother-in-law had left her, and he told himself that, if needed, he would be her brother. "I worry that you haven't been happy," he said, "since the last time I saw you."

"Happy!" she replied. "I have lived such a life as I did not think any man or woman could be made to live on this side the grave. I will be honest with you, Harry. Nothing but the conviction that it could not be for long has saved me from destroying myself. I knew that he must die!"

"Happy!" she said. "I've lived a life that I didn't think anyone could live on this side of the grave. I'll be honest with you, Harry. The only thing that kept me from ending it all was the belief that it wouldn't last much longer. I knew he had to die!"

"Oh, Lady Ongar!"

"Oh, Lady Ongar!"

"Yes, indeed; that is the name he gave me; and because I consented to take it from him, he treated me;—O heavens! how am I to find words to tell you what he did, and the way in which he treated me. A woman could not tell it to a man. Harry, I have no friend that I trust but you, but to you I cannot tell it. When he found that he had been wrong in marrying me, that he did not want the thing which he had thought would suit him, that I was a drag upon him rather than a comfort,—what was his mode, do you think, of ridding himself of the burden?" Clavering sat silent looking at her. Both her hands were now up to her forehead, and her large eyes were gazing at him till he found himself unable to withdraw his own for a moment from her face. "He strove to get another man to take me off his hands; and when he found that he was failing,—he charged me with the guilt which he himself had contrived for me."

"Yes, that's the name he gave me; and because I agreed to take it from him, he treated me—Oh my God! How can I find the words to explain what he did and how he treated me? A woman can't share this with a man. Harry, you’re the only friend I trust, but I can't tell you either. When he realized he had made a mistake in marrying me, that I wasn’t what he thought he wanted, and that I was more of a burden than a source of comfort, how do you think he tried to free himself from that burden?" Clavering sat silently, looking at her. Both of her hands were now pressed to her forehead, and her large eyes were fixed on him until he found it impossible to look away from her face. "He tried to get another man to take me off his hands; and when he saw that wasn't working, he accused me of the guilt he himself had created for me."

"Lady Ongar!"

"Lady Ongar!"

"Yes; you may well stare at me. You may well speak hoarsely and look like that. It may be that even you will not believe me;—but by the God in whom we both believe, I tell you nothing but the truth. He attempted that and he failed,—and then he accused me of the crime which he could not bring me to commit."

"Yeah, you can totally stare at me. You can talk in a raspy voice and look like that. You might not even believe me;—but by the God we both believe in, I’m telling you nothing but the truth. He tried that and he failed,—and then he blamed me for the crime he couldn't get me to commit."

"And what then?"

"And then what?"

"Yes; what then? Harry, I had a thing to do, and a life to live, that would have tried the bravest; but I went through it. I stuck to him to the last! He told me before he was dying,—before that last frightful illness, that I was staying with him for his money. 'For your money, my lord,' I said, 'and for my own name.' And so it was. Would it have been wise in me, after all that I had gone through, to have given up that for which I had sold myself? I had been very poor, and had been so placed that poverty, even such poverty as mine, was a curse to me. You know what I gave up because I feared that curse. Was I to be foiled at last, because such a creature as that wanted to shirk out of his bargain? I knew there were some who would say I had been false. Hugh Clavering says so now, I suppose. But they never should say I had left him to die alone in a foreign land."

"Yeah, so what? Harry, I had a lot to deal with and a life to live that would challenge anyone, but I got through it. I stood by him until the end! He told me before he died—before that last terrible illness—that I was with him for his money. 'For your money, my lord,' I said, 'and for my own reputation.' And that was the truth. Would it have been smart for me, after everything I had gone through, to give up what I had sacrificed so much for? I had been very poor, and my situation made poverty, even the kind I experienced, a real burden for me. You know what I gave up because I feared that burden. Was I supposed to give up at the last minute just because someone like that wanted to back out of his promise? I knew some would accuse me of being dishonest. Hugh Clavering probably says so now. But they can never claim I left him to die alone in a foreign country."

"Did he ask you to leave him?"

"Did he tell you to go?"

"No;—but he called me that name which no woman should hear and stay. No woman should do so unless she had a purpose such as mine. He wanted back the price that he had paid, and I was determined to do nothing that should assist him in his meanness! And then, Harry, his last illness! Oh, Harry, you would pity me if you could know all!"

"No;—but he called me that name no woman should hear and stay. No woman should do that unless she had a purpose like mine. He wanted back the money he had paid, and I was set on doing nothing to help him with his cruelty! And then, Harry, his final illness! Oh, Harry, you would feel sorry for me if you knew everything!"

"It was his own intemperance!"

"It was his own excessive behavior!"

"Intemperance! It was brandy,—sheer brandy. He brought himself to such a state that nothing but brandy would keep him alive, and in which brandy was sure to kill him;—and it did kill him. Did you ever hear of the horrors of drink?"

"Excess! It was straight-up brandy. He got himself into such a situation that only brandy could keep him going, even though that brandy was guaranteed to end his life—and it did. Have you ever heard about the nightmares that come with drinking?"

"Yes; I have heard of such a state."

"Yeah, I’ve heard of that kind of place."

"I hope you may never live to see it. It is a sight that would stick by you for ever. But I saw it, and tended him through the whole, as though I had been his servant. I remained with him when that man who opened the door for you could no longer endure the room. I was with him when the strong woman from the hospital, though she could not understand his words, almost fainted at what she saw and heard. He was punished, Harry. I need wish no farther vengeance on him, even for all his cruelty, his injustice, his unmanly treachery. Is it not fearful to think that any man should have the power of bringing himself to such an end as that?"

"I hope you never have to witness it. It's something that would stick with you forever. But I saw it and took care of him the whole time, as if I were his servant. I stayed with him when that guy who let you in could no longer stand being in the room. I was there when the strong woman from the hospital, even though she couldn't understand his words, nearly fainted at what she witnessed. He was punished, Harry. I wouldn't wish anything worse on him, even with all his cruelty, injustice, and unmanly betrayal. Isn't it terrifying to think that any man could have the power to bring himself to such an end?"

Harry was thinking rather how fearful it was that a man should have it in his power to drag any woman through such a Gehenna as that which this lord had created. He felt that had Julia Brabazon been his, as she had once promised him, he never would have allowed himself to speak a harsh word to her, to have looked at her except with loving eyes. But she had chosen to join herself to a man who had treated her with a cruelty exceeding all that his imagination could have conceived. "It is a mercy that he has gone," said he at last.

Harry was thinking about how terrifying it was that a man could have the power to put any woman through such hell as the one this lord had created. He felt that if Julia Brabazon had been his, as she once promised him, he would never have spoken a harsh word to her or looked at her with anything but love. But she had chosen to be with a man who treated her with a cruelty beyond anything he could have imagined. "It's a relief that he's gone," he finally said.

"It is a mercy for both. Perhaps you can understand now something of my married life. And through it all I had but one friend;—if I may call him a friend who had come to terms with my husband, and was to have been his agent in destroying me. But when this man understood from me that I was not what he had been taught to think me,—which my husband had told him I was,—he relented."

"It’s a relief for both of us. Maybe now you can grasp something about my marriage. Throughout it all, I only had one friend; if I can even call him that, since he had made a deal with my husband and was supposed to help him ruin me. However, when this guy realized from me that I wasn’t what my husband had led him to believe I was, he changed his mind."

"May I ask what was that man's name?"

"Can I ask what that man's name was?"

"His name is Pateroff. He is a Pole, but he speaks English like an Englishman. In my presence he told Lord Ongar that he was false and brutal. Lord Ongar laughed, with that little, low, sneering laughter which was his nearest approach to merriment, and told Count Pateroff that that was of course his game before me. There, Harry,—I will tell you nothing more of it. You will understand enough to know what I have suffered; and if you can believe that I have not sinned—"

"His name is Pateroff. He’s Polish, but he speaks English like a native. In front of me, he told Lord Ongar that he was deceitful and cruel. Lord Ongar laughed with that low, sneering chuckle that was his closest version of being amused and told Count Pateroff that it was obviously his tactic in front of me. There, Harry—I won’t say any more about it. You’ll grasp enough to understand what I’ve been through; and if you can believe that I haven’t screwed up—"

"Oh, Lady Ongar!"

"Oh, Lady Ongar!"

"Well, I will not doubt you again. But as far as I can learn you are nearly alone in your belief. What Hermy thinks I cannot tell, but she will soon come to think as Hugh may bid her. And I shall not blame her. What else can she do, poor creature?"

"Well, I won’t doubt you again. But from what I can tell, you’re almost alone in your belief. I can’t say what Hermy thinks, but she’ll probably start thinking like Hugh wants her to. And I can’t blame her. What else can she do, poor thing?"

"I am sure she believes no ill of you."

"I’m sure she thinks no bad of you."

"I have one advantage, Harry,—one advantage over her and some others. I am free. The chains have hurt me sorely during my slavery; but I am free, and the price of my servitude remains. He had written home,—would you believe that?—while I was living with him he had written home to say that evidence should be collected for getting rid of me. And yet he would sometimes be civil, hoping to cheat me into inadvertencies. He would ask that man to dine, and then of a sudden would be absent; and during this he was ordering that evidence should be collected! Evidence, indeed! The same servants have lived with me through it all. If I could now bring forward evidence I could make it all clear as the day. But there needs no care for a woman's honour, though a man may have to guard his by collecting evidence!"

"I have one advantage, Harry—one advantage over her and some others. I’m free. The chains hurt me a lot during my time as a servant, but I’m free now, and the cost of my servitude remains. Can you believe it? While I was living with him, he wrote home to say that evidence should be gathered to get rid of me. And yet sometimes he would act polite, trying to trick me into mistakes. He would invite that man to dinner, then suddenly be absent; during this time, he was ordering the collection of evidence! Evidence, really! The same servants have been with me through it all. If I could present evidence now, I could make everything as clear as day. But nobody cares about a woman's honor, even though a man might have to protect his by collecting evidence!"

"But what he did cannot injure you."

"But what he did can't hurt you."

"Yes, Harry, it has injured me; it has all but destroyed me. Have not reports reached even you? Speak out like a man, and say whether it is not so?"

"Yes, Harry, it has hurt me; it has almost ruined me. Haven't reports reached you as well? Speak up like a man and say whether that's true?"

"I have heard something."

"I've heard something."

"Yes, you have heard something! If you heard something of your sister where would you be? All the world would be a chaos to you till you had pulled out somebody's tongue by the roots. Not injured me! For two years your cousin Hugh's house was my home. I met Lord Ongar in his house. I was married from his house. He is my brother-in-law, and it so happens that of all men he is the nearest to me. He stands well before the world, and at this time could have done me real service. How is it that he did not welcome me home;—that I am not now at his house with my sister; that he did not meet me so that the world might know that I was received back among my own people? Why is it, Harry, that I am telling this to you;—to you, who are nothing to me; my sister's husband's cousin; a young man, from your position not fit to be my confidant? Why am I telling this to you, Harry?"

"Yes, you’ve heard something! If you heard something about your sister, where would you be? The whole world would feel chaotic until you had ripped someone’s tongue out. Not injured me! For two years, your cousin Hugh's house was my home. I met Lord Ongar there. I got married from that house. He is my brother-in-law, and it just so happens that of all men, he is the closest to me. He has a good reputation, and right now, he could have genuinely helped me. Why didn’t he welcome me home? Why am I not at his house with my sister? Why didn’t he meet me so that everyone could see I was back among my own people? Why am I telling you all this, Harry?—to you, who means nothing to me; my sister's husband's cousin; a young man not in a position to be my confidant? Why am I sharing this with you, Harry?"

"Because we are old friends," said he, wondering again at this moment whether she knew of his engagement with Florence Burton.

"Since we’re old friends," he said, wondering once again at that moment whether she was aware of his engagement to Florence Burton.

"Yes, we are old friends, and we have always liked each other; but you must know that, as the world judges, I am wrong to tell all this to you. I should be wrong,—only that the world has cast me out, so that I am no longer bound to regard it. I am Lady Ongar, and I have my share of that man's money. They have given me up Ongar Park, having satisfied themselves that it is mine by right, and must be mine by law. But he has robbed me of every friend I had in the world, and yet you tell me he has not injured me!"

"Yes, we’re old friends, and we’ve always liked each other; but you need to understand that, according to the world's standards, it’s wrong for me to share all of this with you. I would be wrong—except that the world has rejected me, so I no longer have to care about its judgment. I am Lady Ongar, and I have my share of that man’s money. They’ve granted me Ongar Park, having confirmed that it’s rightfully mine and must be mine by law. But he has taken away every friend I had in the world, and yet you say he hasn’t harmed me!"

"Not every friend."

"Not all friends."

"No, Harry, I will not forget you, though I spoke so slightingly of you just now. But your vanity need not be hurt. It is only the world,—Mrs. Grundy, you know, that would deny me such friendship as yours; not my own taste or choice. Mrs. Grundy always denies us exactly those things which we ourselves like best. You are clever enough to understand that."

"No, Harry, I won’t forget you, even though I just talked about you so casually. But don’t let your ego take a hit. It’s just society—Mrs. Grundy, you know—who would deny me a friendship like yours; it’s not my personal preference. Mrs. Grundy always rejects the very things we love the most. You’re smart enough to get that."

He smiled and looked foolish, and declared that he only offered his assistance because perhaps it might be convenient at the present moment. What could he do for her? How could he show his friendship for her now at once?

He smiled and looked a bit silly, saying that he was only offering his help because it might be useful right now. What could he do for her? How could he immediately show his friendship for her?

"You have done it, Harry, in listening to me and giving me your sympathy. It is seldom that we want any great thing from our friends. I want nothing of that kind. No one can hurt me much further now. My money and my rank are safe; and, perhaps, by degrees, acquaintances, if not friends, will form themselves round me again. At present, of course, I see no one; but because I see no one, I wanted some one to whom I could speak. Poor Hermy is worse than no one. Good-by, Harry; you look surprised and bewildered now, but you will soon get over that. Don't be long before I see you again."

"You did it, Harry, by listening to me and showing me your support. We rarely want anything major from our friends. I don't want anything like that. No one can hurt me much more at this point. My money and my status are secure, and maybe, over time, acquaintances—if not friends—will gather around me again. Right now, of course, I’m not seeing anyone, but since I’m not seeing anyone, I wanted someone to talk to. Poor Hermy is worse than having no one at all. Goodbye, Harry; you look surprised and confused now, but you'll get past that soon. Don't take too long to come back."

Then, feeling that he was bidden to go, he wished her good-by, and went.

Then, sensing that he was being urged to leave, he said goodbye to her and departed.

 

 

CHAPTER VIII.

THE HOUSE IN ONSLOW CRESCENT.

Harry, as he walked away from the house in Bolton Street, hardly knew whether he was on his heels or his head. Burton had told him not to dress—"We don't give dress dinner parties, you know. It's all in the family way with us,"—and Harry, therefore, went direct from Bolton Street to Onslow Crescent. But, though he managed to keep the proper course down Piccadilly, he was in such confusion of mind that he hardly knew whither he was going. It seemed as though a new form of life had been opened to him, and that it had been opened in such a way as almost necessarily to engulf him. It was not only that Lady Ongar's history was so terrible, and her life so strange, but that he himself was called upon to form a part of that history, and to join himself in some sort to that life. This countess with her wealth, her rank, her beauty, and her bright intellect had called him to her, and told him that he was her only friend. Of course he had promised his friendship. How could he have failed to give such a promise to one whom he had loved so well? But to what must such a promise lead, or rather to what must it not have led had it not been for Florence Burton? She was young, free, and rich. She made no pretence of regret for the husband she had lost, speaking of him as though in truth she hardly regarded herself as his wife. And she was the same Julia whom he had loved, who had loved him, who had jilted him, and in regret for whom he had once resolved to lead a wretched, lonely life! Of course she must expect that he would renew it all;—unless, indeed, she knew of his engagement. But if she knew it, why had she not spoken of it?

Harry, as he walked away from the house on Bolton Street, could hardly tell if he was coming or going. Burton had told him not to dress up—“We don’t throw formal dinner parties, you know. It’s all in the family way for us,”—so Harry went straight from Bolton Street to Onslow Crescent. Even though he managed to stay on course down Piccadilly, he was so confused that he hardly knew where he was headed. It felt like a new kind of life had opened up for him, and it was so overwhelming that it seemed likely to consume him. It wasn't just that Lady Ongar's story was so awful and her life so unusual, but that he was now part of that story, getting tied into that life somehow. This countess, with her wealth, status, beauty, and sharp mind, had summoned him, claiming he was her only friend. Naturally, he had promised his friendship. How could he not promise someone he had cared for so deeply? But what would such a promise lead to, or rather, what wouldn’t it have led to if not for Florence Burton? She was young, independent, and wealthy. She showed no signs of regret for her lost husband, talking about him as if she barely considered herself his wife. And she was the same Julia he had once loved, who had loved him back, who had betrayed him, and for whom he had previously vowed to live a miserable, solitary life! Of course, she must have expected him to rekindle everything unless, of course, she knew about his engagement. But if she did know, why hadn’t she mentioned it?

And could it be that she had no friends,—that everybody had deserted her, that she was all alone in the world? As he thought of it all, the whole thing seemed to him to be too terrible for reality. What a tragedy was that she had told him! He thought of the man's insolence to the woman whom he had married and sworn to love, then of his cruelty, his fiendish, hellish cruelty,—and lastly of his terrible punishment. "I stuck to him through it all," she had said to him; and then he endeavoured to picture to himself that bedside by which Julia Brabazon, his Julia Brabazon, had remained firm, when hospital attendants had been scared by the horrors they had witnessed, and the nerves of a strong man,—of a man paid for such work, had failed him!

And could it really be that she had no friends—that everyone had abandoned her, leaving her all alone in the world? As he thought about it, everything seemed too awful to be real. What a tragedy she had shared with him! He considered the man’s disrespect toward the woman he had married and promised to love, then his cruelty, his monstrous, hellish cruelty—and finally, his harsh punishment. "I stood by him through it all," she had told him; and then he tried to picture that bedside where Julia Brabazon, his Julia Brabazon, had remained strong, even when hospital staff had been terrified by the horrors they had seen, and the nerves of a capable man—someone paid for that job—had let him down!

The truth of her word throughout he never doubted; and, indeed, no man or woman who heard her could have doubted. One hears stories told that to oneself, the hearer, are manifestly false; and one hears stories as to the truth or falsehood of which one is in doubt; and stories again which seem to be partly true and partly untrue. But one also hears that of the truth of which no doubt seems to be possible. So it had been with the tale which Lady Ongar had told. It had been all as she had said; and had Sir Hugh heard it,—even Sir Hugh, who doubted all men and regarded all women as being false beyond doubt,—even he, I think, would have believed it.

He never doubted the truth of her words; in fact, no man or woman who heard her could have doubted either. Sometimes, we hear stories that are clearly false to us as the listener; then there are stories where the truth is uncertain, and others that seem to have some truth mixed with untruth. But then there are also those stories where no doubt about the truth seems possible. That was the case with the tale Lady Ongar shared. Everything she said was true; if Sir Hugh had heard it—even Sir Hugh, who was skeptical of all men and considered all women untrustworthy—he would have believed it too.

But she had deserved the sufferings which had come upon her. Even Harry, whose heart was very tender towards her, owned as much as that. She had sold herself, as she had said of herself more than once. She had given herself to a man whom she regarded not at all, even when her heart belonged to another,—to a man whom she must have loathed and despised when she was putting her hand into his before the altar. What scorn had there been upon her face when she spoke of the beginning of their married miseries! With what eloquence of expression had she pronounced him to be vile, worthless, unmanly; a thing from which a woman must turn with speechless contempt! She had now his name, his rank, and his money, but she was friendless and alone. Harry Clavering declared to himself that she had deserved it,—and, having so declared, forgave her all her faults. She had sinned, and then had suffered; and, therefore, should now be forgiven. If he could do aught to ease her troubles, he would do it,—as a brother would for a sister.

But she had earned the suffering that had come upon her. Even Harry, who was very tender-hearted towards her, admitted this. She had sold herself, as she had said about herself more than once. She had given herself to a man she didn’t care about at all, even when her heart belonged to someone else—to a man she must have loathed and despised when she was placing her hand in his before the altar. There had been such scorn on her face when she talked about the start of their married misery! With what strong expressions had she called him vile, worthless, and unmanly; a person a woman must turn away from in speechless contempt! Now she had his name, his title, and his money, but she was friendless and alone. Harry Clavering told himself that she had deserved it—and, having thought that, he forgave her all her faults. She had sinned and then suffered; so she should now be forgiven. If he could do anything to ease her troubles, he would do it—as a brother would for a sister.

But it would be well that she should know of his engagement. Then he thought of the whole interview, and felt sure that she must know it. At any rate he told himself that he was sure. She could hardly have spoken to him as she had done, unless she had known. When last they had been together, sauntering round the gardens at Clavering, he had rebuked her for her treachery to him. Now she came to him almost open-armed, free, full of her cares, swearing to him that he was her only friend! All this could mean but one thing,—unless she knew that that one thing was barred by his altered position.

But it would be good for her to know about his engagement. Then he reflected on their entire conversation and felt certain that she must have figured it out. At the very least, he convinced himself he was sure. She could hardly have spoken to him the way she did unless she already knew. The last time they were together, wandering around the gardens at Clavering, he had called her out for betraying him. Now she approached him almost with open arms, relaxed, and sharing her worries, insisting that he was her only friend! All of this could only mean one thing—unless she knew that this one thing was off-limits because of his changed circumstances.

But it gratified him to think that she had chosen him for the repository of her tale; that she had told her terrible history to him. I fear that some small part of this gratification was owing to her rank and wealth. To be the one friend of a widowed countess, young, rich, and beautiful, was something much out of the common way. Such confidence lifted him far above the Wallikers of the world. That he was pleased to be so trusted by one that was beautiful, was, I think, no disgrace to him;—although I bear in mind his condition as a man engaged. It might be dangerous, but that danger in such case it would be his duty to overcome. But in order that it might be overcome, it would certainly be well that she should know his position.

But he felt pleased to think that she had picked him to share her story; that she had confided her painful history to him. I worry that some part of this pleasure came from her rank and wealth. Being the only friend of a widowed countess who was young, rich, and beautiful was quite extraordinary. Such trust elevated him far above the average people in the world. I don’t think it’s shameful that he was happy to be trusted by someone so attractive—even considering that he was engaged. It might be risky, but overcoming that risk would be his responsibility. However, for him to handle it, she definitely needed to know about his situation.

I fear he speculated as he went along as to what might have been his condition in the world had he never seen Florence Burton. First he asked himself, whether, under any circumstances, he would have wished to marry a widow, and especially a widow by whom he had already been jilted. Yes; he thought that he could have forgiven her even that, if his own heart had not changed; but he did not forget to tell himself again how lucky it was for him that his heart was changed. What countess in the world, let her have what park she might, and any imaginable number of thousands a year, could be so sweet, so nice, so good, so fitting for him as his own Florence Burton? Then he endeavoured to reflect what happened when a commoner married the widow of a peer. She was still called, he believed, by her old title, unless she should choose to abandon it. Any such arrangement was now out of the question; but he thought that he would prefer that she should have been called Mrs. Clavering, if such a state of things had come about. I do not know that he pictured to himself any necessity, either on her part or on his, of abandoning anything else that came to her from her late husband.

I worry he wondered as he went along what his life would have been like if he had never met Florence Burton. First, he asked himself whether, under any circumstances, he would have wanted to marry a widow, especially one who had already jilted him. Yes; he thought he could have forgiven her for that, if his own feelings hadn’t changed; but he reminded himself how lucky it was that his heart had changed. What countess in the world, no matter what estate she had or how many thousands a year, could be as sweet, nice, good, and right for him as his own Florence Burton? Then he tried to think about what happens when a commoner marries a peer’s widow. She was still called, he believed, by her old title unless she chose to give it up. Any such situation was now out of the question; but he thought he would rather she had been called Mrs. Clavering if that had happened. I don't think he imagined there was any need for either of them to give up anything else that came to her from her late husband.

At half-past six, the time named by Theodore Burton, he found himself at the door in Onslow Crescent, and was at once shown up into the drawing-room. He knew that Mr. Burton had a family, and he had pictured to himself an untidy, ugly house, with an untidy, motherly woman going about with a baby in her arms. Such would naturally be the home of a man who dusted his shoes with his pocket-handkerchief. But to his surprise he found himself in as pretty a drawing-room as he remembered to have seen; and seated on a sofa, was almost as pretty a woman as he remembered. She was tall and slight, with large brown eyes and well-defined eyebrows, with an oval face, and the sweetest, kindest mouth that ever graced a woman. Her dark brown hair was quite plain, having been brushed simply smooth across the forehead, and then collected in a knot behind. Close beside her, on a low chair, sat a little fair-haired girl, about seven years old, who was going through some pretence at needlework; and kneeling on a higher chair, while she sprawled over the drawing-room table, was another girl, some three years younger, who was engaged with a puzzle-box.

At six-thirty, the time set by Theodore Burton, he arrived at the door on Onslow Crescent and was immediately taken up to the living room. He knew Mr. Burton had a family and had imagined a messy, unattractive house with a disheveled, motherly woman carrying a baby. That would be typical for a man who dusted his shoes with his pocket handkerchief. But to his surprise, he found himself in the prettiest living room he had ever seen; and sitting on a sofa was an almost equally stunning woman. She was tall and slim, with large brown eyes and well-defined eyebrows, an oval face, and the sweetest, kindest mouth he had ever seen. Her dark brown hair was simply styled, brushed smoothly across her forehead and gathered in a knot at the back. Next to her on a low chair sat a little fair-haired girl, around seven years old, pretending to do some needlework; and kneeling on a higher chair, leaning over the living room table, was another girl, about three years younger, focused on a puzzle box.

"Mr. Clavering," said she, rising from her chair; "I am so glad to see you, though I am almost angry with you for not coming to us sooner. I have heard so much about you; of course you know that." Harry explained that he had only been a few days in town, and declared that he was happy to learn that he had been considered worth talking about.

"Mr. Clavering," she said, getting up from her chair, "I’m really glad to see you, although I’m a bit annoyed that you didn’t come to see us sooner. I’ve heard so much about you; I’m sure you know that." Harry mentioned that he had only been in town for a few days and said he was pleased to find out that he had been talked about.

"If you were worth accepting you were worth talking about."

"If you were worth accepting, you were worth discussing."

"Perhaps I was neither," said he.

"Maybe I was neither," he said.

"Well; I am not going to flatter you yet. Only as I think our Flo is without exception the most perfect girl I ever saw, I don't suppose she would be guilty of making a bad choice. Cissy, dear, this is Mr. Clavering."

"Well, I'm not going to flatter you just yet. But since I believe our Flo is undeniably the most perfect girl I've ever seen, I doubt she would make a bad choice. Cissy, dear, this is Mr. Clavering."

Cissy got up from her chair, and came up to him. "Mamma says I am to love you very much," said Cissy, putting up her face to be kissed.

Cissy stood up from her chair and walked over to him. "Mom says I'm supposed to love you a lot," Cissy said, lifting her face to be kissed.

"But I did not tell you to say I had told you," said Mrs. Burton, laughing.

"But I didn't tell you to say I told you," Mrs. Burton said, laughing.

"And I will love you very much," said Harry, taking her up in his arms.

"And I will love you so much," said Harry, lifting her into his arms.

"But not so much as Aunt Florence,—will you?"

"But not as much as Aunt Florence, will you?"

They all knew it. It was clear to him that everybody connected with the Burtons had been told of the engagement, and that they all spoke of it openly, as they did of any other everyday family occurrence. There was not much reticence among the Burtons. He could not but feel this, though now, at the present moment, he was disposed to think specially well of the family because Mrs. Burton and her children were so nice.

They all knew it. It was obvious to him that everyone associated with the Burtons had heard about the engagement, and that they all talked about it openly, just like any other everyday family event. There wasn't much secrecy among the Burtons. He couldn't help but feel this, even though, at that moment, he was inclined to think especially highly of the family because Mrs. Burton and her kids were so nice.

"And this is another daughter?"

"And this is another daughter?"

"Yes; another future niece, Mr. Clavering. But I suppose I may call you Harry; may I not? My name is Cecilia. Yes, that is Miss Pert."

"Yes, another future niece, Mr. Clavering. But I guess I can call you Harry, right? My name is Cecilia. Yes, that's Miss Pert."

"I'm not Miss Pert," said the little soft round ball of a girl from the chair. "I'm Sophy Burton. Oh! you musn't tittle."

"I'm not Miss Pert," said the little soft, round girl from the chair. "I'm Sophy Burton. Oh! you mustn't tease."

Harry found himself quite at home in ten minutes; and before Mr. Burton had returned, had been taken upstairs into the nursery to see Theodore Burton Junior in his cradle, Theodore Burton Junior being as yet only some few months old. "Now you've seen us all," said Mrs. Burton, "and we'll go downstairs and wait for my husband. I must let you into a secret, too. We don't dine till past seven; you may as well remember that for the future. But I wanted to have you for half-an-hour to myself before dinner, so that I might look at you, and make up my mind about Flo's choice. I hope you won't be angry with me?"

Harry felt completely at home in just ten minutes; and before Mr. Burton came back, he had already been taken upstairs to the nursery to see Theodore Burton Junior in his crib, who was only a few months old. "Now you've met us all," said Mrs. Burton, "and we'll go downstairs and wait for my husband. I have to let you in on a secret, too. We don't eat dinner until after seven; you might want to remember that for next time. But I wanted to have you to myself for half an hour before dinner so I could look at you and decide about Flo's choice. I hope you’re not mad at me?"

"And how have you made up your mind?"

"And how did you decide?"

"If you want to find that out, you must get it through Florence. You may be quite sure I shall tell her; and, I suppose, I may be quite sure she will tell you. Does she tell you everything?"

"If you want to find that out, you have to go through Florence. You can be sure I will let her know; and, I guess, I can be sure she will tell you. Does she share everything with you?"

"I tell her everything," said Harry, feeling himself, however, to be a little conscience-smitten at the moment, as he remembered his interview with Lady Ongar. Things had occurred this very day which he certainly could not tell her.

"I tell her everything," Harry said, feeling a bit guilty at the moment as he remembered his meeting with Lady Ongar. Events had happened that very day that he definitely couldn't share with her.

"Do;—do; always do that," said Mrs. Burton, laying her hand affectionately on his arm. "There is no way so certain to bind a woman to you, heart and soul, as to show her that you trust her in everything. Theodore tells me everything. I don't think there's a drain planned under a railway-bank, but that he shows it me in some way; and I feel so grateful for it. It makes me know that I can never do enough for him. I hope you'll be as good to Flo as he is to me."

"Please, always do that," Mrs. Burton said, placing her hand warmly on his arm. "There's no better way to connect with a woman, heart and soul, than by showing her that you trust her completely. Theodore shares everything with me. I don't think there's any project planned under a railway bank that he doesn't show me in some way, and I really appreciate it. It makes me feel like I'll never be able to do enough for him. I hope you'll be as kind to Flo as he is to me."

"We can't both be perfect, you know."

"We can't both be perfect, you know."

"Ah, well! of course you'll laugh at me. Theodore always laughs at me when I get on what he calls a high horse. I wonder whether you are as sensible as he is?"

"Ah, well! of course you'll laugh at me. Theodore always laughs at me when I get on what he calls a high horse. I wonder if you’re as sensible as he is?"

Harry reflected that he never wore cotton gloves. "I don't think I am very sensible," said he. "I do a great many foolish things, and the worst is, that I like them."

Harry thought about how he never wore cotton gloves. "I don't think I'm very sensible," he said. "I do a lot of silly things, and the worst part is, I actually enjoy them."

"So do I. I like so many foolish things."

"So do I. I enjoy so many silly things."

"Oh, mamma!" said Cissy.

"Oh, mom!" said Cissy.

"I shall have that quoted against me, now, for the next six months, whenever I am preaching wisdom in the nursery. But Florence is nearly as sensible as her brother."

"I'll have that held against me for the next six months, every time I'm trying to share my wisdom in the nursery. But Florence is almost as sensible as her brother."

"Much more so than I am."

"Much more than I am."

"All the Burtons are full up to their eyes with good sense. And what a good thing it is! Who ever heard of any of them coming to sorrow? Whatever they have to live on, they always have enough. Did you ever know a woman who has done better with her children, or has known how to do better, than Theodore's mother? She is the dearest old woman." Harry had heard her called a very clever old woman by certain persons in Stratton, and could not but think of her matrimonial successes as her praises were thus sung by her daughter-in-law.

"All the Burtons are full of common sense. And what a great thing that is! Who has ever heard of any of them ending up in trouble? No matter what they have to live on, they always have enough. Have you ever known a woman who has done better by her children or who knows how to do better than Theodore's mother? She is the sweetest old lady." Harry had heard her described as a very smart old woman by some people in Stratton, and he couldn't help but think of her marital successes as her daughter-in-law praised her.

They went on talking, while Sophy sat in Harry's lap, till there was heard the sound of the key in the latch of the front-door, and the master of the house was known to be there. "It's Theodore," said his wife, jumping up and going out to meet him. "I'm so glad that you have been here a little before him, because now I feel that I know you. When he's here I shan't get in a word." Then she went down to her husband, and Harry was left to speculate how so very charming a woman could ever have been brought to love a man who cleaned his boots with his pocket-handkerchief.

They kept chatting while Sophy sat on Harry's lap until they heard the sound of the key turning in the front door, signaling that the master of the house had arrived. "It's Theodore," his wife said, jumping up and heading out to greet him. "I'm so glad you got here a little before him because now I feel like I really know you. When he's around, I won't get a word in." Then she went downstairs to her husband, leaving Harry to wonder how such an enchanting woman could ever fall for a man who used his pocket handkerchief to clean his boots.

There were soon steps again upon the stairs, and Burton returned bringing with him another man whom he introduced to Harry as Mr. Jones. "I didn't know my brother was coming," said Mrs. Burton, "but it will be very pleasant, as of course I shall want you to know him." Harry became a little perplexed. How far might these family ramifications be supposed to go? Would he be welcomed, as one of the household, to the hearth of Mrs. Jones; and if of Mrs. Jones, then of Mrs. Jones's brother? His mental inquiries, however, in this direction, were soon ended by his finding that Mr. Jones was a bachelor.

There were soon footsteps again on the stairs, and Burton came back with another man whom he introduced to Harry as Mr. Jones. "I didn't know my brother was coming," said Mrs. Burton, "but it's nice, because I definitely want you to meet him." Harry felt a bit confused. How far did these family connections go? Would he be welcomed, as part of the family, to the home of Mrs. Jones; and if he was going to meet Mrs. Jones, then would he also meet Mrs. Jones's brother? However, his thoughts in that direction were quickly resolved when he realized that Mr. Jones was a bachelor.

Jones, it appeared, was the editor, or sub-editor, or co-editor, of some influential daily newspaper. "He is a night bird, Harry—," said Mrs. Burton. She had fallen into the way of calling him Harry at once, but he could not on that occasion bring himself to call her Cecilia. He might have done so had not her husband been present, but he was ashamed to do it before him. "He is a night bird, Harry," said she, speaking of her brother, "and flies away at nine o'clock, that he may go and hoot like an owl in some dark city haunt that he has. Then, when he is himself asleep at breakfast-time, his hootings are being heard round the town."

Jones seemed to be the editor, or possibly the sub-editor or co-editor, of some influential daily newspaper. "He's a night owl, Harry," Mrs. Burton said. She had quickly gotten into the habit of calling him Harry, but he couldn’t bring himself to call her Cecilia this time. He might have done it if her husband weren’t there, but he felt awkward doing it in front of him. "He's a night owl, Harry," she continued, referring to her brother, "and he takes off at nine o'clock so he can go and hoot like an owl in some dark corner of the city. Then, while he's asleep at breakfast, his hootings are echoing around town."

Harry rather liked the idea of knowing an editor. Editors were, he thought, influential people, who had the world very much under their feet,—being, as he conceived, afraid of no men, while other men are very much afraid of them. He was glad enough to shake Jones by the hand, when he found that Jones was an editor. But Jones, though he had the face and forehead of a clever man, was very quiet, and seemed almost submissive to his sister and brother-in-law.

Harry really liked the idea of knowing an editor. Editors were, he thought, influential people who seemed to have the world at their feet—fearless, while other people were quite scared of them. He was happy to shake Jones's hand when he realized Jones was an editor. But Jones, even though he had the face and forehead of a smart man, was very quiet and seemed almost submissive to his sister and brother-in-law.

The dinner was plain, but good, and Harry after a while became happy and satisfied, although he had come to the house with something almost like a resolution to find fault. Men, and women also, do frequently go about in such a mood, having unconscionably from some small circumstance, prejudged their acquaintances, and made up their mind that their acquaintances should be condemned. Influenced in this way, Harry had not intended to pass a pleasant evening, and would have stood aloof and been cold, had it been possible to him; but he found that it was not possible; and after a little while he was friendly and joyous, and the dinner went off very well. There was some wild-fowl, and he was agreeably surprised as he watched the mental anxiety and gastronomic skill with which Burton went through the process of preparing the gravy, with lemon and pepper, having in the room a little silver-pot and an apparatus of fire for the occasion. He would as soon have expected the Archbishop of Canterbury himself to go through such an operation in the dining-room at Lambeth as the hard-working man of business whom he had known in the chambers at the Adelphi.

The dinner was simple, but good, and after a while, Harry felt happy and satisfied, even though he had arrived at the house determined to find something to complain about. Both men and women often walk around in such a mood, having unfairly judged their acquaintances based on some minor detail and deciding in advance that those acquaintances should be criticized. Because of this, Harry didn’t plan on having a pleasant evening and would have kept his distance and been cold if he could have; but he quickly realized that wasn't an option. Before long, he was friendly and cheerful, and the dinner went quite well. There was some game meat, and he was pleasantly surprised to see the careful thought and skill with which Burton prepared the gravy, using lemon and pepper and a little silver pot with a flame setup for the purpose. He’d have sooner expected the Archbishop of Canterbury to handle such a task in the dining room at Lambeth than the hardworking businessman he’d known in the chambers at the Adelphi.

"Does he always do that, Mrs. Burton?" Harry asked.

"Does he always do that, Mrs. Burton?" Harry asked.

"Always," said Burton, "when I can get the materials. One doesn't bother oneself about a cold leg of mutton, you know, which is my usual dinner when we are alone. The children have it hot in the middle of the day."

"Always," Burton said, "when I can get the ingredients. You don't really think twice about a cold leg of mutton, you know, which is what I usually have for dinner when it’s just us. The kids have it hot in the middle of the day."

"Such a thing never happened to him yet, Harry," said Mrs. Burton.

"That kind of thing has never happened to him before, Harry," said Mrs. Burton.

"Gently with the pepper," said the editor. It was the first word he had spoken for some time.

"Gently with the pepper," said the editor. It was the first thing he had said in a while.

"Be good enough to remember that, yourself, when you are writing your article to-night."

"Please keep that in mind when you write your article tonight."

"No, none for me, Theodore," said Mrs. Burton.

"No, none for me, Theodore," Mrs. Burton said.

"Cissy!"

"Cissy!"

"I have dined really. If I had remembered that you were going to display your cookery, I would have kept some of my energy, but I forgot it."

"I actually had dinner. If I had remembered that you were going to show off your cooking, I would have saved some of my energy, but I forgot."

"As a rule," said Burton, "I don't think women recognize any difference in flavours. I believe wild duck and hashed mutton would be quite the same to my wife if her eyes were blinded. I should not mind this, if it were not that they are generally proud of the deficiency. They think it grand."

"As a rule," said Burton, "I don't think women can tell the difference in flavors. I believe wild duck and hashed mutton would taste the same to my wife if she were blindfolded. I wouldn't mind this, except that they are usually proud of this lack of ability. They think it's impressive."

"Just as men think it grand not to know one tune from another," said his wife.

"Just as men think it's impressive not to recognize one song from another," said his wife.

When dinner was over, Burton got up from his seat. "Harry," said he, "do you like good wine?" Harry said that he did. Whatever women may say about wild-fowl, men never profess an indifference to good wine, although there is a theory about the world, quite as incorrect as it is general, that they have given up drinking it. "Indeed, I do," said Harry. "Then I'll give you a bottle of port," said Burton, and so saying he left the room.

When dinner was finished, Burton stood up from his chair. "Harry," he said, "do you enjoy good wine?" Harry replied that he did. No matter what women might claim about game birds, men never claim to be indifferent to good wine, even though there's a widespread belief, which is as wrong as it is common, that they've stopped drinking it. "I really do," Harry said. "Then I'll give you a bottle of port," Burton said, and with that, he exited the room.

"I'm very glad you have come to-day," said Jones, with much gravity. "He never gives me any of that when I'm alone with him; and he never, by any means, brings it out for company."

"I'm really glad you came today," said Jones seriously. "He never shares any of that when I’m alone with him, and he never brings it out when there are others around."

"You don't mean to accuse him of drinking it alone, Tom?" said his sister, laughing.

"You can't be serious about accusing him of drinking it alone, Tom?" his sister said, laughing.

"I don't know when he drinks it; I only know when he doesn't."

"I don't know when he drinks it; I only know when he doesn't."

The wine was decanted with as much care as had been given to the concoction of the gravy, and the clearness of the dark liquid was scrutinized with an eye that was full of anxious care. "Now, Cissy, what do you think of that? She knows a glass of good wine when she gets it, as well as you do, Harry; in spite of her contempt for the duck."

The wine was poured with as much care as had gone into making the gravy, and the clarity of the dark liquid was examined with an eye full of worried attention. "Now, Cissy, what do you think of that? She knows a good glass of wine when she sees it, just like you do, Harry; despite her disdain for the duck."

As they sipped the old port they sat round the dining-room fire, and Harry Clavering was forced to own to himself that he had never been more comfortable.

As they enjoyed the aged port, they gathered around the dining room fire, and Harry Clavering had to admit to himself that he had never felt more at ease.

"Ah," said Burton, stretching out his slippered feet, "why can't it all be after-dinner, instead of that weary room at the Adelphi?"

"Ah," said Burton, stretching out his slippered feet, "why can't it all be after dinner, instead of that exhausting room at the Adelphi?"

"And all old port?" said Jones.

"And all the old port?" said Jones.

"Yes, and all old port. You are not such an ass as to suppose that a man in suggesting to himself a continuance of pleasure suggests to himself also the evils which are supposed to accompany such pleasure. If I took much of the stuff I should get cross and sick, and make a beast of myself; but then what a pity it is that it should be so."

"Yeah, and all that vintage wine. You can’t really think that when a person imagines continuing to enjoy something, they also think about the negative things that usually come with that enjoyment. If I had too much of it, I’d get irritable and feel awful, and really make a fool of myself; but still, it’s such a shame that it has to be this way."

"You wouldn't like much of it, I think," said his wife.

"You probably wouldn't enjoy most of it," said his wife.

"That is it," said he. "We are driven to work because work never palls on us, whereas pleasure always does. What a wonderful scheme it is when one looks at it all. No man can follow pleasure long continually. When a man strives to do so, he turns his pleasure at once into business, and works at that. Come, Harry, we mustn't have another bottle, as Jones would go to sleep among the type." Then they all went upstairs together. Harry, before he went away, was taken again up into the nursery, and there kissed the two little girls in their cots. When he was outside the nursery door, on the top of the stairs, Mrs. Burton took him by the hand. "You'll come to us often," said she, "and make yourself at home here, will you not?" Harry could not but say that he would. Indeed he did so without hesitation, almost with eagerness, for he had liked her and had liked her house. "We think of you, you know," she continued, "quite as one of ourselves. How could it be otherwise when Flo is the dearest to us of all beyond our own?"

"That's it," he said. "We're driven to work because it never gets old for us, while pleasure always does. It's a pretty amazing setup when you really think about it. No one can pursue pleasure continuously for long. When someone tries, they just end up turning their pleasure into work. Come on, Harry, we shouldn't have another bottle, or Jones will end up snoozing among the type." Then they all headed upstairs together. Before leaving, Harry went back up to the nursery and kissed the two little girls in their cribs. As he stood outside the nursery door at the top of the stairs, Mrs. Burton took his hand. "You'll come and see us often," she said, "and make yourself at home here, right?" Harry couldn't help but agree. In fact, he said it without hesitation, almost eagerly, because he had liked her and her home. "We think of you as one of us," she continued, "how could we not when Flo is the dearest to us of all besides our own?"

"It makes me so happy to hear you say so," said he.

"It makes me really happy to hear you say that," he said.

"Then come here and talk about her. I want Theodore to feel that you are his brother; it will be so important to you in the business that it should be so." After that he went away, and as he walked back along Piccadilly, and then up through the regions of St. Giles to his home in Bloomsbury Square, he satisfied himself that the life of Onslow Crescent was a better manner of life than that which was likely to prevail in Bolton Street.

"Then come here and talk about her. I want Theodore to feel that you’re his brother; it’s going to be really important for you in the business, so it should be that way." After that, he left, and as he walked back along Piccadilly and then up through St. Giles to his home in Bloomsbury Square, he convinced himself that life on Onslow Crescent was a better way of living than what was likely to happen on Bolton Street.

When he was gone his character was of course discussed between the husband and wife in Onslow Crescent. "What do you think of him?" said the husband.

When he left, his character was naturally a topic of conversation between the husband and wife in Onslow Crescent. "What do you think of him?" the husband asked.

"I like him so much! He is so much nicer than you told me,—so much pleasanter and easier; and I have no doubt he is as clever, though I don't think he shows that at once."

"I like him a lot! He’s way nicer than you said he would be—much more pleasant and easy to talk to; and I’m sure he’s as smart, even though he doesn't show it right away."

"He is clever enough; there's no doubt about that."

"He’s smart enough; that’s for sure."

"And did you not think he was pleasant?"

"And didn't you think he was nice?"

"Yes; he was pleasant here. He is one of those men who get on best with women. You'll make much more of him for awhile than I shall. He'll gossip with you and sit idling with you for the hour together, if you'll let him. There's nothing wrong about him, and he'd like nothing better than that."

"Yes; he was nice here. He’s one of those guys who gets along better with women. You'll get along with him a lot more than I will for a while. He'll chat with you and hang out with you for hours, if you want. There’s nothing wrong with him, and he’d love that."

"You don't believe that he's idle by disposition? Think of all that he has done already."

"You don't think he's naturally lazy? Just look at everything he's done so far."

"That's just what is most against him. He might do very well with us if he had not got that confounded fellowship; but having got that, he thinks the hard work of life is pretty well over with him."

"That's exactly what works against him the most. He could do really well with us if it weren't for that annoying fellowship; but now that he has it, he thinks the tough grind of life is mostly behind him."

"I don't suppose he can be so foolish as that, Theodore."

"I can't believe he would be that foolish, Theodore."

"I know well what such men are, and I know the evil that is done to them by the cramming they endure. They learn many names of things,—high-sounding names, and they come to understand a great deal about words. It is a knowledge that requires no experience and very little real thought. But it demands much memory; and when they have loaded themselves in this way, they think that they are instructed in all things. After all, what can they do that is of real use to mankind? What can they create?"

"I know exactly what those kinds of guys are like, and I understand the damage done to them by all the pressure they face. They memorize a lot of terms—impressive-sounding ones—and they come to grasp a bit about language. It's a type of knowledge that doesn’t need any real experience and very little genuine thought. But it requires a ton of memorization; and once they’ve crammed all this in, they believe they are experts in everything. But really, what can they do that's actually useful to people? What can they make?"

"I suppose they are of use."

"I think they're helpful."

"I don't know it. A man will tell you, or pretend to tell you,—for the chances are ten to one that he is wrong,—what sort of lingo was spoken in some particular island or province six hundred years before Christ. What good will that do any one, even if he were right? And then see the effect upon the men themselves! At four-and-twenty a young fellow has achieved some wonderful success, and calls himself by some outlandish and conceited name—a double first, or something of the kind. Then he thinks he has completed everything, and is too vain to learn anything afterwards. The truth is, that at twenty-four no man has done more than acquire the rudiments of his education. The system is bad from beginning to end. All that competition makes false and imperfect growth. Come, I'll go to bed."

"I don’t know. A guy will tell you, or pretend to tell you—because there's a good chance he’s wrong—what kind of language was spoken in some specific island or province six hundred years before Christ. What good does that do anyone, even if he’s right? And then look at the impact on the guys themselves! By twenty-four, a young man has scored some amazing achievement and calls himself by some pretentious title—a double first, or something like that. Then he thinks he's done it all and is too arrogant to learn anything else afterward. The truth is, that at twenty-four, no man has done more than grasp the basics of his education. The system is flawed from start to finish. All that competition leads to false and incomplete growth. Come on, I’m going to bed."

What would Harry have said if he had heard all this from the man who dusted his boots with his handkerchief?

What would Harry have said if he had heard all this from the guy who wiped his boots with his handkerchief?

 

 

CHAPTER IX.

TOO PRUDENT BY HALF.

Florence Burton thought herself the happiest girl in the world. There was nothing wanting to the perfection of her bliss. She could perceive, though she never allowed her mind to dwell upon the fact, that her lover was superior in many respects to the men whom her sisters had married. He was better educated, better looking, in fact more fully a gentleman at all points than either Scarness or any of the others. She liked her sisters' husbands very well, and in former days, before Harry Clavering had come to Stratton, she had never taught herself to think that she, if she married, would want anything different from that which Providence had given to them. She had never thrown up her head, or even thrown up her nose, and told herself that she would demand something better than that. But not the less was she alive to the knowledge that something better had come in her way, and that that something better was now her own. She was very proud of her lover, and, no doubt, in some gently feminine way showed that she was so as she made her way about among her friends at Stratton. Any idea that she herself was better educated, better looking, or more clever than her elder sisters, and that, therefore, she was deserving of a higher order of husband, had never entered her mind. The Burtons in London,—Theodore Burton and his wife,—who knew her well, and who, of all the family, were best able to appreciate her worth, had long been of opinion that she deserved some specially favoured lot in life. The question with them would be, whether Harry Clavering was good enough for her.

Florence Burton considered herself the happiest girl in the world. There was nothing missing from her complete happiness. She could see, though she never let herself dwell on it, that her boyfriend was superior in many ways to the men her sisters had married. He was better educated, better looking, and genuinely a complete gentleman compared to Scarness or any of the others. She liked her sisters' husbands just fine, and in the past, before Harry Clavering arrived in Stratton, she had never thought that if she married, she would want anything different from what fate had given them. She never looked down on them or thought she deserved something better. But she was definitely aware that something better had come her way, and that this something better was now hers. She was very proud of her boyfriend and, no doubt, in a subtly feminine way, showed it as she mingled with her friends in Stratton. The thought that she was better educated, better looking, or smarter than her older sisters, and therefore worthy of a higher-caliber husband, had never crossed her mind. The Burtons in London—Theodore Burton and his wife—who knew her well, and who, among the family, were the best able to recognize her worth, had long believed that she deserved something special in life. Their concern was whether Harry Clavering was good enough for her.

Everybody at Stratton knew that she was engaged, and when they wished her joy she made no coy denials. Her sisters had all been engaged in the same way, and their marriages had gone off in regular sequence to their engagements. There had never been any secret with them about their affairs. On this matter the practice is very various among different people. There are families who think it almost indelicate to talk about marriage as a thing actually in prospect for any of their own community. An ordinary acquaintance would be considered to be impertinent in even hinting at such a thing, although the thing were an established fact. The engaged young ladies only whisper the news through the very depths of their pink note-paper, and are supposed to blush as they communicate the tidings by their pens, even in the retirement of their own rooms. But there are other families in which there is no vestige of such mystery, in which an engaged couple are spoken of together as openly as though they were already bound in some sort of public partnership. In these families the young ladies talk openly of their lovers, and generally prefer that subject of conversation to any other. Such a family,—so little mysterious,—so open in their arrangements, was that of the Burtons at Stratton. The reserve in the reserved families is usually atoned for by the magnificence of the bridal arrangements, when the marriage is at last solemnized; whereas, among the other set,—the people who have no reserve,—the marriage, when it comes, is customarily an affair of much less outward ceremony. They are married without blast of trumpet, with very little profit to the confectioner, and do their honeymoon, if they do it at all, with prosaic simplicity.

Everybody at Stratton knew she was engaged, and when they congratulated her, she didn’t shy away from it. Her sisters had all gotten engaged in the same way, and their marriages followed the same regular pattern as their engagements. They never kept their romantic lives a secret. People have various practices regarding this. Some families find it almost inappropriate to discuss marriage as something that’s actually happening for anyone in their circle. A casual acquaintance would be seen as rude for even hinting at it, even if it’s a well-known fact. The engaged young women only share the news through the depths of their pink stationery and are believed to blush as they write it down, even in the privacy of their own rooms. However, there are other families where there’s no hint of such secrecy, and an engaged couple is talked about openly, as if they were already in some sort of public partnership. In these families, the young women freely discuss their partners and often prefer that topic over anything else. The Burtons at Stratton were one such family—so open and straightforward about their arrangements. In reserved families, the lack of openness is often compensated for by the grandeur of the wedding plans when the marriage finally happens; meanwhile, in families without such reserve, the wedding is typically a much simpler affair. They marry quietly, with little fanfare, barely any business for the caterers, and if they take a honeymoon at all, it’s done in a very straightforward way.

Florence had made up her mind that she would be in no hurry about it. Harry was in a hurry; but that was a matter of course. He was a quick-blooded, impatient, restless being. She was slower, and more given to consideration. It would be better that they should wait, even if it were for five or six years. She had no fear of poverty for herself. She had lived always in a house in which money was much regarded, and among people who were of inexpensive habits. But such had not been his lot, and it was her duty to think of the mode of life which might suit him. He would not be happy as a poor man,—without comforts around him, which would simply be comforts to him though they would be luxuries to her. When her mother told her, shaking her head rather sorrowfully as she heard Florence talk, that she did not like long engagements, Florence would shake hers too, in playful derision, and tell her mother not to be so suspicious. "It is not you that are going to marry him, mamma."

Florence had decided she wouldn't rush into anything. Harry was in a hurry, but that was typical of him. He was passionate, impatient, and restless. She was more deliberate and thoughtful. It would be better for them to wait, even if it took five or six years. She wasn't worried about being poor. She had always lived in a household where money was important, among people who were not extravagant. But that wasn't his experience, and she felt it was her responsibility to consider the type of life that would suit him. He wouldn’t be happy as a poor man—without the comforts he desired, which would be luxuries to her but basic comforts to him. When her mother expressed her disapproval of long engagements, shaking her head sadly as she listened to Florence, Florence would playfully shake her head back and tell her not to be so suspicious. "It's not you who's marrying him, Mom."

"No, my dear; I know that. But long engagements never are good. And I can't think why young people should want so many things, now, that they used to do without very well when I was married. When I went into housekeeping, we only had one girl of fifteen to do everything; and we hadn't a nursemaid regular till Theodore was born; and there were three before him."

"No, my dear; I know that. But long engagements are never good. I can’t understand why young people want so many things now that they managed to do without when I got married. When I started running a household, we only had one fifteen-year-old girl to do everything; we didn’t have a regular nanny until Theodore was born, and there were three kids before him."

Florence could not say how many maid-servants Harry might wish to have under similar circumstances, but she was very confident that he would want much more attendance than her father and mother had done, or even than some of her brothers and sisters. Her father, when he first married, would not have objected, on returning home, to find his wife in the kitchen, looking after the progress of the dinner; nor even would her brother Theodore have been made unhappy by such a circumstance. But Harry, she knew, would not like it; and therefore Harry must wait. "It will do him good, mamma," said Florence. "You can't think that I mean to find fault with him; but I know that he is young in his ways. He is one of those men who should not marry till they are twenty-eight, or thereabouts."

Florence couldn't say how many maid-servants Harry might want in similar situations, but she was sure he'd want a lot more help than her parents ever had, or even more than some of her siblings. Her father, when he first got married, wouldn't have minded coming home to find his wife in the kitchen, checking on dinner; nor would her brother Theodore have been upset by that. But she knew Harry wouldn't like it, so he would have to wait. "It will be good for him, mom," Florence said. "You can't think I'm criticizing him; I just know he's still learning how things work. He's the kind of guy who shouldn't get married until he's around twenty-eight."

"You mean that he is unsteady?"

"You mean he's unstable?"

"No,—not unsteady. I don't think him a bit unsteady; but he will be happier single for a year or two. He hasn't settled down to like his tea and toast when he is tired of his work, as a married man should do. Do you know that I am not sure that a little flirtation would not be very good for him?"

"No, I don’t think he’s unstable at all; but I believe he’ll be happier being single for a year or two. He hasn’t gotten used to enjoying his tea and toast after a long day at work, like a married man should. Do you know that I’m not sure a little flirting wouldn’t be good for him?"

"Oh, my dear!"

"Oh, my gosh!"

"It should be very moderate, you know."

"It should be quite moderate, you know."

"But then, suppose it wasn't moderate. I don't like to see engaged young men going on in that way. I suppose I'm very old-fashioned; but I think when a young man is engaged, he ought to remember it and to show it. It ought to make him a little serious, and he shouldn't be going about like a butterfly, that may do just as it pleases in the sunshine."

"But then, what if it wasn't moderate? I really don't like seeing engaged young men behave like that. I guess I'm pretty old-fashioned; but I believe when a young man is engaged, he should acknowledge it and act accordingly. It should make him a bit serious, and he shouldn't be flitting around like a butterfly, doing whatever it wants in the sunshine."

During the three months which Harry remained in town before the Easter holidays he wrote more than once to Florence, pressing her to name an early day for their marriage. These letters were written, I think, after certain evenings spent under favourable circumstances in Onslow Crescent, when he was full of the merits of domestic comfort, and perhaps also owed some of their inspiration to the fact that Lady Ongar had left London without seeing him. He had called repeatedly in Bolton Street, having been specially pressed to do so by Lady Ongar, but he had only once found her at home, and then a third person had been present. This third person had been a lady who was not introduced to him, but he had learned from her speech that she was a foreigner. On that occasion Lady Ongar had made herself gracious and pleasant, but nothing had passed which interested him, and, most unreasonably, he had felt himself to be provoked. When next he went to Bolton Street he found that Lady Ongar had left London. She had gone down to Ongar Park, and, as far as the woman at the house knew, intended to remain there till after Easter. Harry had some undefined idea that she should not have taken such a step without telling him. Had she not declared to him that he was her only friend? When a friend is going out of town, leaving an only friend behind, that friend ought to tell her only friend what she is going to do, otherwise such a declaration of only-friendship means nothing. Such was Harry Clavering's reasoning, and having so reasoned, he declared to himself that it did mean nothing, and was very pressing to Florence Burton to name an early day. He had been with Cecilia, he told her,—he had learned to call Mrs. Burton Cecilia in his letters,—and she quite agreed with him that their income would be enough. He was to have two hundred a year from his father, having brought himself to abandon that high-toned resolve which he had made some time since that he would never draw any part of his income from the parental coffers. His father had again offered it, and he had accepted it. Old Mr. Burton was to add a hundred, and Harry was of opinion that they could do very well. Cecilia thought the same, he said, and therefore Florence surely would not refuse. But Florence received, direct from Onslow Crescent, Cecilia's own version of her thoughts, and did refuse. It may be surmised that she would have refused even without assistance from Cecilia, for she was a young lady not of a fickle or changing disposition. So she wrote to Harry with much care, and as her letter had some influence on the story to be told, the reader shall read it,—if the reader so pleases.
 

During the three months that Harry stayed in town before the Easter holidays, he wrote to Florence several times, urging her to set an early date for their wedding. I believe these letters were inspired by evenings spent under favorable circumstances in Onslow Crescent, when he was enthusiastic about the benefits of domestic comfort, and perhaps because Lady Ongar had left London without seeing him. He had tried several times to visit her in Bolton Street, having been encouraged to do so by Lady Ongar, but he had only found her at home once, and there was a third person with them. This third person was a woman who wasn’t introduced to him, but from her accent, he realized she was a foreigner. That day, Lady Ongar had been charming and pleasant, but nothing of interest happened, and he felt unreasonably irritated. When he next went to Bolton Street, he discovered that Lady Ongar had left London. She had gone to Ongar Park and, according to the woman at the house, planned to stay there until after Easter. Harry had a vague notion that she shouldn’t have taken off without telling him. Hadn’t she said he was her only friend? When a friend is leaving town, they should inform their only friend about their plans, or else such a declaration of friendship means nothing. This was Harry Clavering’s reasoning, and having thought it through, he convinced himself it did mean nothing and continued to press Florence Burton to pick a date. He had been with Cecilia, he told her—he had started addressing Mrs. Burton as Cecilia in his letters—and she agreed that their income would be sufficient. He would receive two hundred a year from his father, having decided to abandon his earlier high-minded pledge never to take any money from his parents. His father had offered it again, and he had accepted. Old Mr. Burton was also going to add a hundred, so Harry believed they would be just fine. He said Cecilia thought the same, and therefore Florence surely wouldn’t say no. But Florence received Cecilia’s own perspective on the matter directly from Onslow Crescent and did decline. It can be assumed that she would have refused even without Cecilia’s influence, as she was a young woman of steady character. So, she carefully wrote to Harry, and since her letter significantly impacts the story to be told, the reader shall read it—if they wish to.

Stratton. March, 186—.

Stratton. March, 186—.

Dear Harry,—

Dear Harry,—

I received your letter this morning, and answer it at once, because I know you will be impatient for an answer. You are impatient about things,—are you not? But it was a kind, sweet, dear, generous letter, and I need not tell you now that I love the writer of it with all my heart. I am so glad you like Cecilia. I think she is the perfection of a woman. And Theodore is every bit as good as Cecilia, though I know you don't think so, because you don't say so. I am always happy when I am in Onslow Crescent. I should have been there this spring, only that a certain person who chooses to think that his claims on me are stronger than those of any other person wishes me to go elsewhere. Mamma wishes me to go to London also for a week, but I don't want to be away from the old house too much before the final parting comes at last.

I received your letter this morning and wanted to respond right away because I know you're eager for an answer. You do have a tendency to be impatient, don’t you? But your letter was so kind, sweet, lovely, and generous, and I don't need to tell you how much I love the person who wrote it. I'm really glad you like Cecilia. I believe she’s the perfect woman. And Theodore is just as wonderful as Cecilia, even though I know you don’t think so since you haven't said it. I'm always happy when I'm on Onslow Crescent. I would have been there this spring, but someone who believes he has stronger claims on me than anyone else wants me to go somewhere else. Mom also wants me to visit London for a week, but I don't want to be away from our old house too much before the final goodbye comes along at last.

And now about the final parting; for I may as well rush at it at once. I need hardly tell you that no care for father or mother shall make me put off my marriage. Of course I owe everything to you now; and as they have approved it, I have no right to think of them in opposition to you. And you must not suppose that they ask me to stay. On the contrary, mamma is always telling me that early marriages are best. She has sent all the birds out of the nest but one; and is impatient to see that one fly away, that she may be sure that there is no lame one in the brood. You must not therefore think that it is mamma; nor is it papa, as regards himself,—though papa agrees with me in thinking that we ought to wait a little.

Now, about that final goodbye; I might as well get straight to the point. I hardly need to say that no concern for my mom or dad will make me postpone my marriage. Of course, I owe everything to you now; and since they’ve approved it, I have no right to consider them against you. And don’t think they’re asking me to stay. On the contrary, mom always says that early marriages are the best. She’s already sent all the kids out of the nest except one; and she’s eager to see that one go so she can be sure there are no weak links in the family. So don’t think it’s mom’s doing; it’s not dad either, at least not for his own reasons—though he agrees with me that we should wait a little longer.

Dear Harry, you must not be angry, but I am sure that we ought to wait. We are, both of us, young, and why should we be in a hurry? I know what you will say, and of course I love you the more because you love me so well; but I fancy that I can be quite happy if I can see you two or three times in the year, and hear from you constantly. It is so good of you to write such nice letters, and the longer they are the better I like them. Whatever you put in them, I like them to be full. I know I can't write nice letters myself, and it makes me unhappy. Unless I have got something special to say, I am dumb.

Dear Harry, please don’t be upset, but I really think we should wait. We’re both young, so why rush? I know what you’re going to say, and of course I love you even more because you care for me so much; but I think I’d be pretty happy if I could see you two or three times a year and hear from you regularly. It’s so sweet of you to write such lovely letters, and the longer they are, the more I enjoy them. No matter what you say, I want them to reflect your thoughts. I know I’m not great at writing nice letters myself, and that makes me feel bad. Unless I have something specific to say, I just can’t find the words.

But now I have something special to say. In spite of all that you tell me about Cecilia, I do not think it would do for us to venture upon marrying yet. I know that you are willing to sacrifice everything, but I ought not on that account to accept a sacrifice. I could not bear to see you poor and uncomfortable; and we should be very poor in London now-a-days with such an income as we should have. If we were going to live here at Stratton perhaps we might manage, but I feel sure that it would be imprudent in London. You ought not to be angry with me for saying this, for I am quite as anxious to be with you as you can possibly be to be with me; only I can bear to look forward, and have a pleasure in feeling that all my happiness is to come. I know I am right in this. Do write me one little line to say that you are not angry with your little girl.

But now I have something important to discuss. Despite everything you say about Cecilia, I don't think it would be wise for us to get married just yet. I know you're ready to give up everything, but I shouldn’t accept that sacrifice. I couldn’t bear to see you struggling and unhappy; and we would definitely be very poor in London these days with the income we'd have. If we were going to live here in Stratton, maybe we could make it work, but I’m convinced it would be unwise in London. You shouldn’t be upset with me for saying this, because I want to be with you just as much as you want to be with me; it’s just that I can look ahead and find comfort in knowing that all my happiness is still to come. I know I’m right about this. Please write me a little note to say that you’re not mad at your little girl.

I shall be quite ready for you by the 29th. I got such a dear little note from Fanny the other day. She says that you never write to them, and she supposes that I have the advantage of all your energy in that way. I have told her that I do get a good deal. My brother writes to me very seldom, I know; and I get twenty letters from Cecilia for one scrap that Theodore ever sends me. Perhaps some of these days I shall be the chief correspondent with the rectory. Fanny told me all about the dresses, and I have my own quite ready. I've been bridesmaid to four of my own sisters, so I ought to know what I'm about. I'll never be bridesmaid to anybody again, after Fanny; but whom on earth shall I have for myself? I think we must wait till Cissy and Sophy are ready. Cissy wrote me word that you were a darling man. I don't know how much of that came directly from Cissy, or how much from Cecilia.

I’ll be ready for you by the 29th. I got such a sweet note from Fanny the other day. She says you never write to them, and she thinks I must have all your energy in that department. I told her I get a fair amount. My brother rarely writes to me, I know; and I receive twenty letters from Cecilia for every little note that Theodore ever sends. Maybe one of these days I’ll be the main correspondent with the rectory. Fanny updated me about the dresses, and I have my own all ready. I've been a bridesmaid for four of my sisters, so I should know the ropes. I won’t be a bridesmaid for anyone else after Fanny; but who on earth will I choose for myself? I think we should wait until Cissy and Sophy are ready. Cissy told me you were a wonderful guy. I’m not sure how much of that came directly from Cissy or how much was from Cecilia.

God bless you, dear, dearest Harry. Let me have one letter before you come to fetch me, and acknowledge that I am right, even if you say that I am disagreeable. Of course I like to think that you want to have me; but, you see, one has to pay the penalty of being civilized.—Ever and always your own affectionate

God bless you, my dear Harry. Please send me one letter before you come to get me, and admit that I’m right, even if you think I’m difficult. Of course, I like to believe that you want me around; but, as you know, there’s a cost to being civilized. —Always and forever yours, affectionate

Florence Burton.
 

Florence Burton.

Harry Clavering was very angry when he got this letter. The primary cause of his anger was the fact that Florence should pretend to know what was better for him than he knew himself. If he was willing to encounter life in London on less than four hundred a year, surely she might be contented to try the same experiment. He did not for a moment suspect that she feared for herself, but he was indignant with her because of her fear for him. What right had she to accuse him of wanting to be comfortable? Had he not for her sake consented to be very uncomfortable at that old house at Stratton? Was he not willing to give up his fellowship, and the society of Lady Ongar, and everything else, for her sake? Had he not shown himself to be such a lover as there is not one in a hundred? And yet she wrote and told him that it wouldn't do for him to be poor and uncomfortable! After all that he had done in the world, after all that he had gone through, it would be odd if, at this time of day, he did not know what was good for himself! It was in that way that he regarded Florence's pertinacity.

Harry Clavering was really angry when he received this letter. The main reason for his anger was that Florence acted like she knew what was best for him better than he did. If he was willing to face life in London on less than four hundred a year, then she should at least be willing to try the same thing. He didn’t for a second think that she was worried for herself, but he was furious with her because of her concern for him. What right did she have to accuse him of wanting to be comfortable? Hadn’t he, for her sake, agreed to be very uncomfortable at that old house in Stratton? Wasn’t he prepared to give up his fellowship, and the company of Lady Ongar, and everything else, just for her? Hadn’t he proven himself to be a lover unlike any other? And still, she wrote to tell him that being poor and uncomfortable wouldn’t work for him! After everything he had done in the world and all he had been through, it seemed ridiculous that he wouldn’t know what was good for himself by now! That’s how he viewed Florence’s stubbornness.

He was rather unhappy at this period. It seemed to him that he was somewhat slighted on both sides,—or, if I may say so, less thought of on both sides than he deserved. Had Lady Ongar remained in town, as she ought to have done, he would have solaced himself, and at the same time have revenged himself upon Florence, by devoting some of his spare hours to that lady. It was Lady Ongar's sudden departure that had made him feel that he ought to rush at once into marriage. Now he had no consolation, except that of complaining to Mrs. Burton, and going frequently to the theatre. To Mrs. Burton he did complain a great deal, pulling her worsteds and threads about the while, sitting in idleness while she was working, just as Theodore Burton had predicted that he would do.

He was pretty unhappy during this time. It felt to him like he was being overlooked by both sides—or, to put it another way, not appreciated as much as he deserved. If Lady Ongar had stayed in town like she should have, he could have found comfort and even taken some revenge on Florence by spending some of his free time with that lady. It was Lady Ongar's sudden exit that made him think he needed to rush into marriage. Now he had no one to turn to for comfort except Mrs. Burton, and he ended up going to the theater a lot. He complained to Mrs. Burton quite a bit, messing with her yarns and threads while sitting idle as she worked, just as Theodore Burton had predicted he would.

"I won't have you so idle, Harry," Mrs. Burton said to him one day. "You know you ought to be at your office now." It must be admitted on behalf of Harry Clavering, that they who liked him, especially women, were able to become intimate with him very easily. He had comfortable, homely ways about him, and did not habitually give himself airs. He had become quite domesticated at the Burtons' house during the ten weeks that he had been in London, and knew his way to Onslow Crescent almost too well. It may, perhaps, be surmised correctly that he would not have gone there so frequently if Mrs. Theodore Burton had been an ugly woman.

"I can't have you being so lazy, Harry," Mrs. Burton said to him one day. "You know you should be at your office now." It must be noted that those who liked Harry, especially women, found it very easy to get close to him. He had a warm, down-to-earth demeanor and didn't act superior. He had settled into the Burtons' home quite comfortably over the ten weeks he had been in London and knew his way to Onslow Crescent almost too well. It's fair to say he might not have visited as often if Mrs. Theodore Burton hadn't been attractive.

"It's all her fault," said he, continuing to snip a piece of worsted with a pair of scissors as he spoke. "She's too prudent by half."

"It's all her fault," he said, continuing to cut a piece of worsted with a pair of scissors as he spoke. "She's way too careful."

"Poor Florence!"

"Poor Florence!"

"You can't but know that I should work three times as much if she had given me a different answer. It stands to reason any man would work under such circumstances as that. Not that I am idle, I believe. I do as much as any other man about the place."

"You know I would have to work three times harder if she had given me a different answer. It makes sense that any man would under those circumstances. It’s not like I’m lazy; I do as much as anyone else around here."

"I won't have my worsted destroyed all the same. Theodore says that Florence is right."

"I won't let my worsted get ruined anyway. Theodore says Florence is right."

"Of course he does; of course he'll say I'm wrong. I won't ask her again,—that's all."

"Of course he does; of course he's going to say I'm wrong. I won't ask her again—that's it."

"Oh, Harry! don't say that. You know you'll ask her. You would to-morrow, if she were here."

"Oh, Harry! Don’t say that. You know you’ll ask her. You would tomorrow if she were here."

"You don't know me, Cecilia, or you would not say so. When I have made up my mind to a thing, I am generally firm about it. She said something about two years, and I will not say a word to alter that decision. If it be altered, it shall be altered by her."

"You don't really know me, Cecilia, or you wouldn't say that. Once I've made up my mind about something, I tend to stick to it. She mentioned something about two years, and I won't say anything to change that decision. If it changes, it will be up to her to change it."

In the meantime he punished Florence by sending her no special answer to her letter. He wrote to her as usual; but he made no reference to his last proposal, nor to her refusal. She had asked him to tell her that he was not angry, but he would tell her nothing of the kind. He told her when and where and how he would meet her, and convey her from Stratton to Clavering; gave her some account of a play he had seen; described a little dinner-party in Onslow Crescent; and told her a funny story about Mr. Walliker and the office at the Adelphi. But he said no word, even in rebuke, as to her decision about their marriage. He intended that this should be felt to be severe, and took pleasure in the pain that he would be giving. Florence, when she received her letter, knew that he was sore, and understood thoroughly the working of his mind. "I will comfort him when we are together," she said to herself. "I will make him reasonable when I see him." It was not the way in which he expected that his anger would be received.

In the meantime, he punished Florence by not giving her a specific response to her letter. He wrote to her as he usually did, but he didn’t mention his last proposal or her refusal. She had asked him to assure her that he wasn’t angry, but he didn’t say anything like that. He told her when, where, and how he would meet her and take her from Stratton to Clavering; he gave her a summary of a play he had seen; described a little dinner party in Onslow Crescent; and shared a funny story about Mr. Walliker and the office at the Adelphi. But he didn’t say a word, even in criticism, about her decision regarding their marriage. He meant for this to be felt as harsh, and he took pleasure in the discomfort he was causing. When Florence received his letter, she knew he was hurt and understood his mindset completely. "I will comfort him when we’re together," she told herself. "I’ll make him see reason when I see him." This was not how he expected his anger to be received.

One day on his return home he found a card on his table which surprised him very much. It contained a name but no address, but over the name there was a pencil memorandum, stating that the owner of the card would call again on his return to London after Easter. The name on the card was that of Count Pateroff. He remembered the name well as soon as he saw it, though he had never thought of it since the solitary occasion on which it had been mentioned to him. Count Pateroff was the man who had been Lord Ongar's friend, and respecting whom Lord Ongar had brought a false charge against his wife. Why should Count Pateroff call on him? Why was he in England? Whence had he learned the address in Bloomsbury Square? To that last question he had no difficulty in finding an answer. Of course he must have heard it from Lady Ongar. Count Pateroff had now left London! Had he gone to Ongar Park? Harry Clavering's mind was instantly filled with suspicion, and he became jealous in spite of Florence Burton. Could it be that Lady Ongar, not yet four months a widow, was receiving at her house in the country this man with whose name her own had been so fatally joined? If so, what could he think of such behaviour? He was very angry. He knew that he was angry, but he did not at all know that he was jealous. Was he not, by her own declaration to him, her only friend; and as such could he entertain such a suspicion without anger? "Her friend!" he said to himself. "Not if she has any dealings whatever with that man after what she has told me of him!" He remembered at last that perhaps the count might not be at Ongar Park; but he must, at any rate, have had some dealing with Lady Ongar or he would not have known the address in Bloomsbury Square. "Count Pateroff!" he said, repeating the name, "I shouldn't wonder if I have to quarrel with that man." During the whole of that night he was thinking of Lady Ongar. As regarded himself, he knew that he had nothing to offer to Lady Ongar but a brotherly friendship; but, nevertheless, it was an injury to him that she should be acquainted intimately with any unmarried man but himself.

One day, when he got home, he found a card on his table that surprised him a lot. It had a name but no address, and written in pencil above the name was a note saying that the card's owner would come by again after Easter when he returned to London. The name on the card was Count Pateroff. He remembered it instantly, even though he hadn't thought of it since the one time it had been mentioned to him. Count Pateroff was the guy who had been Lord Ongar's friend and about whom Lord Ongar had made a false accusation against his wife. Why would Count Pateroff want to meet him? Why was he in England? How did he find out the address in Bloomsbury Square? He quickly figured out the last question—Lady Ongar must have told him. Count Pateroff had left London! Had he gone to Ongar Park? Harry Clavering's mind was instantly filled with suspicion, and he felt jealous despite his feelings for Florence Burton. Could it be that Lady Ongar, not even four months a widow, was hosting this man whose name had been so tragically linked with hers at her country house? If that were the case, what should he think of such behavior? He felt very angry. He knew he was angry, but he realized he didn’t know he was jealous. Wasn't he, by her own words, her only friend? As her friend, how could he not feel anger over such a suspicion? "Her friend!" he told himself. "Not if she has anything to do with that man after what she's told me about him!" He finally remembered that maybe the count wasn't at Ongar Park, but he must have had some connection with Lady Ongar, or he wouldn’t have known the address in Bloomsbury Square. "Count Pateroff!" he repeated, "I wouldn't be surprised if I end up having to confront that guy." The whole night, he thought about Lady Ongar. He knew he had nothing to offer her but a brotherly friendship; still, it hurt him that she could be close with any unmarried man other than himself.

On the next day he was to go to Stratton, and in the morning a letter was brought to him by the postman; a letter, or rather a very short note. Guildford was the postmark, and he knew at once that it was from Lady Ongar.
 

The next day, he was supposed to go to Stratton, and in the morning, the postman brought him a letter; actually, it was more like a very brief note. The postmark was Guildford, and he immediately recognized it was from Lady Ongar.

Dear Mr. Clavering [the note said],—

Dear Mr. Clavering [the note said],—

I was so sorry to leave London without seeing you; I shall be back by the end of April, and am keeping on the same rooms. Come to me, if you can, on the evening of the 30th, after dinner. He at last bade Hermy to write and ask me to go to Clavering for the Easter week. Such a note! I'll show it you when we meet. Of course I declined.

I'm really sorry I left London without seeing you. I'll be back by the end of April and will have the same rooms. If you can, come visit me on the evening of the 30th after dinner. He finally asked Hermy to write and invite me to Clavering for Easter week. What a note! I’ll show it to you when we meet. Of course, I turned it down.

But I write on purpose to tell you that I have begged Count Pateroff to see you. I have not seen him, but I have had to write to him about things that happened in Florence. He has come to England chiefly with reference to the affairs of Lord Ongar. I want you to hear his story. As far as I have known him he is a truth-telling man, though I do not know that I am able to say much more in his favour.

But I’m writing to let you know that I’ve asked Count Pateroff to meet with you. I haven’t seen him myself, but I had to write to him about some things that happened in Florence. He’s come to England mainly for Lord Ongar’s matters. I want you to hear his side of the story. From my experience with him, he’s an honest man, but I’m not sure I can say much more positive about him.

Ever yours, J. O.
 

Ever yours, J. O.

When he had read this he was quite an altered man. See Count Pateroff! Of course he would see him. What task could be more fitting for a friend than this, of seeing such a man under such circumstances. Before he left London he wrote a note for Count Pateroff, to be given to the count by the people at the lodgings should he call during Harry's absence from London. In this he explained that he would be at Clavering for a fortnight, but expressed himself ready to come up to London at a day's notice should Count Pateroff be necessitated again to leave London before the day named.

When he finished reading this, he was a completely changed man. Sure, he would see Count Pateroff! What better task for a friend than to meet someone like him in such a situation? Before he left London, he wrote a note for Count Pateroff, which the staff at the lodgings would give to the count if he stopped by while Harry was away. In the note, he explained that he would be at Clavering for two weeks but made it clear that he was willing to come back to London on short notice if Count Pateroff needed to leave before the planned date.

As he went about his business that day, and as he journeyed down to Stratton, he entertained much kinder ideas about Lady Ongar than he had previously done since seeing Count Pateroff's card.

As he went about his day and made his way to Stratton, he had much nicer thoughts about Lady Ongar than he had before seeing Count Pateroff's card.

 

 

CHAPTER X.

FLORENCE BURTON AT THE RECTORY.

Harry Clavering went down to Stratton, slept one night at old Mr. Burton's house, and drove Florence over to Clavering,—twenty miles across the country,—on the following day. This journey together had been looked forward to with great delight by both of them, and Florence, in spite of the snubbing which she had received from her lover because of her prudence, was very happy as she seated herself alongside of him in the vehicle which had been sent over from the rectory, and which he called a trap. Not a word had as yet been said between them as to that snubbing, nor was Harry minded that anything should be said. He meant to carry on his revenge by being dumb on that subject. But such was not Florence's intention. She desired not only to have her own way in this matter, but desired also that he should assent to her arrangements.

HHarry Clavering went down to Stratton, spent a night at old Mr. Burton's house, and drove Florence over to Clavering—twenty miles across the countryside—the next day. Both of them had been really looking forward to this journey, and Florence, despite the cold shoulder she had received from her boyfriend due to her cautiousness, was very happy as she took a seat beside him in the vehicle sent over from the rectory, which he called a trap. They hadn’t talked about that cold shoulder yet, and Harry wasn’t planning to bring it up. He intended to take his revenge by staying silent on the topic. But Florence had a different plan. She not only wanted to have her way in this matter but also wanted him to agree with her arrangements.

It was a charming day for such a journey. It was cold, but not cold enough to make them uncomfortable. There was a wind, but not wind enough to torment them. Once there came on a little shower, which just sufficed to give Harry an opportunity of wrapping his companion very closely, but he had hardly completed the ceremony before the necessity for it was over. They both agreed that this mode of travelling was infinitely preferable to a journey by railroad, and I myself should be of the same opinion if one could always make one's journeys under the same circumstances. And it must be understood that Harry, though no doubt he was still taking his revenge on Florence by abstaining from all allusion to her letter, was not disposed to make himself otherwise disagreeable. He played his part of lover very well, and Florence was supremely happy.

It was a lovely day for a trip. It was cold, but not cold enough to be uncomfortable. There was a breeze, but not strong enough to bother them. Once, a light shower came, which gave Harry a chance to wrap his companion up snugly, but he had barely finished before it was no longer needed. They both agreed that this way of traveling was way better than taking the train, and I would think the same if every journey could be like this. And it's important to note that Harry, while clearly still punishing Florence by ignoring her letter, wasn't trying to be unpleasant otherwise. He played his role as a lover very well, and Florence was extremely happy.

"Harry," she said, when the journey was more than half completed, "you never told me what you thought of my letter."

"Harry," she said, when they were more than halfway through the journey, "you never told me what you thought of my letter."

"Which letter?" But he knew very well which was the letter in question.

"Which letter?" But he knew exactly which letter was being referred to.

"My prudent letter,—written in answer to yours that was very imprudent."

"My careful letter—written in response to yours that was very reckless."

"I thought there was nothing more to be said about it."

"I thought there was nothing left to say about it."

"Come, Harry, don't let there be any subject between us that we don't care to think about and discuss. I know what you meant by not answering me. You meant to punish me,—did you not, for having an opinion different from yours? Is not that true, Harry?"

"Come on, Harry, don’t let there be anything between us that we don’t want to think about and talk about. I know what you meant by not replying to me. You meant to punish me, didn’t you, for having a different opinion than yours? Isn’t that right, Harry?"

"Punish you,—no; I did not want to punish you. It was I that was punished, I think."

"Punish you? No, I didn’t want to punish you. I think I was the one who was punished."

"But you know I was right. Was I not right?"

"But you know I was right. Wasn’t I right?"

"I think you were wrong, but I don't want to say anything more about it now."

"I think you were mistaken, but I don't want to discuss it any further right now."

"Ah, but, Harry, I want you to talk about it. Is it not everything to me,—everything in this world,—that you and I should agree about this? I have nothing else to think of but you. I have nothing to hope for but that I may live to be your wife. My only care in the world is my care for you! Come, Harry, don't be glum with me."

"Ah, but Harry, I want you to discuss this. Isn't it everything to me—everything in this world—that you and I should agree on it? I have nothing else to think about except you. My only hope is to live long enough to be your wife. My only concern in this world is my concern for you! Come on, Harry, don't be gloomy with me."

"I am not glum."

"I'm not sad."

"Speak a nice word to me. Tell me that you believe me when I say that it is not of myself I am thinking, but of you."

"Say something kind to me. Let me know that you believe me when I say I'm not thinking about myself, but about you."

"Why can't you let me think for myself in this?"

"Why can't you just let me think for myself about this?"

"Because you have got to think for me."

"Because you need to think for me."

"And I think you'd do very well on the income we've got. If you'll consent to marry, this summer, I won't be glum, as you call it, a moment longer."

"And I think you’d do really well with the income we have. If you agree to marry me this summer, I won’t be down, as you call it, even for a second."

"No, Harry; I must not do that. I should be false to my duty to you if I did."

"No, Harry; I can't do that. It would be disloyal to my responsibilities to you if I did."

"Then it's no use saying anything more about it."

"Then there's no point in saying anything else about it."

"Look here, Harry, if an engagement for two years is tedious to you—"

"Listen, Harry, if a two-year engagement is boring to you—"

"Of course it is tedious. Is not waiting for anything always tedious? There's nothing I hate so much as waiting."

"Of course it’s boring. Isn’t waiting for anything always boring? There’s nothing I hate more than waiting."

"But listen to me," said she, gravely. "If it is too tedious, if it is more than you think you can bear without being unhappy, I will release you from your engagement."

"But listen to me," she said seriously. "If it becomes too boring, if it’s more than you think you can handle without being unhappy, I will free you from your commitment."

"Florence!"

"Florence!"

"Hear me to the end. It will make no change in me; and then if you like to come to me again at the end of the two years, you may be sure of the way in which I shall receive you."

"Hear me out until I'm finished. It won't change how I feel; and if you want to come back to me at the end of the two years, you can be sure of how I will welcome you."

"And what good would that do?"

"And what good would that be?"

"Simply this good, that you would not be bound in a manner that makes you unhappy. If you did not intend that when you asked me to be your wife— Oh, Harry, all I want is to make you happy. That is all that I care for, all that I think about!"

"Simply put, I don't want you to feel trapped in a way that makes you unhappy. If you didn't mean that when you asked me to be your spouse— Oh, Harry, all I want is to make you happy. That's all that matters to me, all I think about!"

Harry swore to her with ten thousand oaths that he would not release her from any part of her engagement with him, that he would give her no loophole of escape from him, that he intended to hold her so firmly that if she divided herself from him, she should be accounted among women a paragon of falseness. He was ready, he said, to marry her to-morrow. That was his wish, his idea of what would be best for both of them;—and after that, if not to-morrow, then on the next day, and so on till the day should come on which she should consent to become his wife. He went on also to say that he should continue to torment her on the subject about once a week till he had induced her to give way; and then he quoted a Latin line to show that a constant dropping of water will hollow a stone. This was somewhat at variance with a declaration he had made to Mrs. Burton, in Onslow Crescent, to the effect that he would never speak to Florence again upon the subject; but then men do occasionally change their minds, and Harry Clavering was a man who often changed his.

Harry promised her with countless oaths that he wouldn’t let her back out of their engagement, that he wouldn’t give her any way to escape, and that he intended to hold on to her so tightly that if she left him, she would be seen as a model of betrayal among women. He said he was ready to marry her tomorrow. That was his desire, his idea of what would be best for both of them;—and if not tomorrow, then the next day, and so on until the day she agreed to become his wife. He also mentioned that he would keep bothering her about it once a week until he convinced her to relent; then he quoted a Latin phrase to illustrate that a steady drip of water can wear away stone. This was a bit inconsistent with what he had told Mrs. Burton in Onslow Crescent—that he would never bring up the subject with Florence again—but then again, men do change their minds occasionally, and Harry Clavering was a man who often did.

Florence, as he made the declaration above described, thought that he played his part of lover very well, and drew herself a little closer to him as she thanked him for his warmth. "Dear Harry, you are so good and so kind, and I do love you so truly!" In this way the journey was made very pleasantly, and when Florence was driven up to the rectory door she was quite contented with her coachman.

Florence, as he made the statement mentioned above, felt that he was doing a great job as a suitor and leaned in a bit closer to him as she expressed her gratitude for his kindness. "Dear Harry, you are so good and so kind, and I really do love you!" This made the journey very enjoyable, and when Florence arrived at the rectory door, she was quite satisfied with her driver.

Harry Clavering, who is the hero of our story, will not, I fear, have hitherto presented himself to the reader as having much of the heroic nature in his character. It will, perhaps, be complained of him that he is fickle, vain, easily led, and almost as easily led to evil as to good. But it should be remembered that hitherto he has been rather hardly dealt with in these pages, and that his faults and weaknesses have been exposed almost unfairly. That he had such faults and was subject to such weaknesses may be believed of him; but there may be a question whether as much evil would not be known of most men, let them be heroes or not be heroes, if their characters were, so to say, turned inside out before our eyes. Harry Clavering, fellow of his college, six feet high, with handsome face and person, and with plenty to say for himself on all subjects, was esteemed highly and regarded much by those who knew him, in spite of those little foibles which marred his character; and I must beg the reader to take the world's opinion about him, and not to estimate him too meanly thus early in this history of his adventures.

Harry Clavering, the hero of our story, may not yet seem very heroic to the reader. Some might say he is fickle, vain, easily influenced, and just as easily swayed toward bad choices as good ones. However, it’s important to remember that he has been portrayed rather harshly so far, and his faults and weaknesses have been highlighted almost unfairly. While it’s true he has those flaws and vulnerabilities, one might question whether an equal amount of negativity wouldn’t apply to most people, whether they are heroes or not, if we were to see their true selves exposed. Harry Clavering, a fellow of his college, stands six feet tall, has a handsome face and physique, and can hold his own in conversations on a wide range of topics. He is highly regarded by those who know him, despite his little quirks that blemish his character. I kindly ask the reader to take into account what others think of him and not to judge him too harshly this early in the tale of his adventures.

If this tale should ever be read by any lady who, in the course of her career, has entered a house under circumstances similar to those which had brought Florence Burton to Clavering rectory, she will understand how anxious must have been that young lady when she encountered the whole Clavering family in the hall. She had been blown about by the wind, and her cloaks and shawls were heavy on her, and her hat was a little out of shape,—from some fault on the part of Harry, as I believe,—and she felt herself to be a dowdy as she appeared among them. What would they think of her, and what would they think of Harry in that he had chosen such an one to be his wife? Mrs. Clavering had kissed her before she had seen that lady's face; and Mary and Fanny had kissed her before she knew which was which; and then a stout, clerical gentleman kissed her who, no doubt, was Mr. Clavering, senior. After that, another clerical gentleman, very much younger and very much slighter, shook hands with her. He might have kissed her, too, had he been so minded, for Florence was too confused to be capable of making any exact reckoning in the matter. He might have done so—that is, as far as Florence was concerned. It may be a question whether Mary Clavering would not have objected; for this clerical gentleman was the Rev. Edward Fielding, who was to become her husband in three days' time.

If any lady happens to read this story who, in her life, has entered a house under similar circumstances to those that brought Florence Burton to Clavering rectory, she will understand how anxious Florence must have felt when she faced the entire Clavering family in the hall. She had been buffeted by the wind, weighed down by her cloaks and shawls, and her hat was slightly misshapen—thanks to something Harry did, I believe—and she felt frumpy compared to them. What would they think of her, and what would they think of Harry for choosing her as his wife? Mrs. Clavering had kissed her before she even saw that lady's face; Mary and Fanny had kissed her before she could tell them apart; and then a stout, older gentleman kissed her who was undoubtedly Mr. Clavering, senior. After that, another younger, slimmer clerical gentleman shook her hand. He might have kissed her too, if he had wanted to, because Florence was too flustered to keep track of everything happening. He could have—at least as far as Florence was concerned. It raises the question of whether Mary Clavering would have minded, though, since this clerical gentleman was the Rev. Edward Fielding, who was set to become her husband in three days.

"Now, Florence," said Fanny, "come upstairs into mamma's room and have some tea, and we'll look at you. Harry, you needn't come. You've had her to yourself for a long time, and can have her again in the evening."

"Now, Florence," Fanny said, "come upstairs to Mom's room and have some tea, and we'll check you out. Harry, you don’t need to come. You’ve had her all to yourself for a while and can have her again in the evening."

Florence, in this way, was taken upstairs and found herself seated by a fire, while three pairs of hands were taking from her her shawls and hat and cloak, almost before she knew where she was.

Florence was led upstairs and soon found herself sitting by a fire, while three pairs of hands were removing her shawls, hat, and cloak, almost before she realized what was happening.

"It is so odd to have you here," said Fanny. "We have only one brother, so, of course, we shall make very much of you. Isn't she nice, mamma?"

"It’s so strange to have you here," said Fanny. "We only have one brother, so naturally, we’re going to treat you really well. Isn’t she lovely, mom?"

"I'm sure she is; very nice. But I shouldn't have told her so before her face, if you hadn't asked the question."

"I'm sure she is; really nice. But I shouldn't have said that to her face if you hadn't asked the question."

"That's nonsense, mamma. You mustn't believe mamma when she pretends to be grand and sententious. It's only put on as a sort of company air, but we don't mean to make company of you."

"That's ridiculous, mom. You shouldn't believe mom when she acts all important and serious. It's just a show for appearance's sake, but we don't plan to entertain you."

"Pray don't," said Florence.

"Please don't," said Florence.

"I'm so glad you are come just at this time," said Mary. "I think so much of having Harry's future wife at my wedding. I wish we were both going to be married the same day."

"I'm so glad you came at just the right time," said Mary. "It means a lot to me to have Harry's future wife at my wedding. I wish we were both getting married on the same day."

"But we are not going to be married for ever so long. Two years hence has been the shortest time named."

"But we aren't going to be married for that long. The shortest time mentioned is two years from now."

"Don't be sure of that, Florence," said Fanny. "We have all of us received a special commission from Harry to talk you out of that heresy; have we not, mamma?"

"Don't be too sure of that, Florence," Fanny said. "We all got a special mission from Harry to talk you out of that nonsense; right, Mom?"

"I think you had better not tease Florence about that immediately on her arrival. It's hardly fair." Then, when they had drunk their tea, Florence was taken away to her own room, and before she was allowed to go downstairs she was intimate with both the girls, and had so far overcome her awe of Harry's mother as to be able to answer her without confusion.

"I think it would be best not to tease Florence about that as soon as she arrives. It's not really fair." After they finished their tea, Florence was taken to her own room, and before she was allowed to go downstairs, she had become close with both girls and had managed to overcome her nervousness around Harry's mom enough to respond without feeling embarrassed.

"Well, sir, what do you think of her?" said Harry to his father, as soon as they were alone.

"Well, Dad, what do you think of her?" Harry asked his father as soon as they were alone.

"I have not had time to think much of her yet. She seems to be very pretty. She isn't so tall as I thought she would be."

"I haven't had much time to think about her yet. She looks really pretty. She isn't as tall as I expected."

"No; she's not tall," said Harry, in a voice of disappointment.

"No, she’s not tall," Harry said, sounding disappointed.

"I've no doubt we shall like her very much. What money is she to have?"

"I’m sure we’ll really like her. What money is she going to have?"

"A hundred a year while her father lives."

"A hundred a year while her father is alive."

"That's not much."

"That’s not a lot."

"Much or little, it made no difference with me. I should never have thought of marrying a girl for her money. It's a kind of thing that I hate. I almost wish she was to have nothing."

"Whether it was a lot or a little, it didn't matter to me. I would never think about marrying a girl just for her money. That's something I can't stand. I almost wish she had nothing at all."

"I shouldn't refuse it if I were you."

"I wouldn't turn it down if I were you."

"Of course, I shan't refuse it; but what I mean is that I never thought about it when I asked her to have me; and I shouldn't have been a bit more likely to ask her if she had ten times as much."

"Of course, I won't refuse it; but what I mean is that I never thought about it when I asked her to be with me; and I wouldn't have been any more likely to ask her if she had ten times as much."

"A fortune with one's wife isn't a bad thing for a poor man, Harry."

"A fortune with your wife isn’t a bad thing for a poor guy, Harry."

"But a poor man must be poor in more senses than one when he looks about to get a fortune in that way."

"But a poor man has to deal with more than one kind of poverty when he looks around trying to find a fortune that way."

"I suppose you won't marry just yet," said the father. "Including everything, you would not have five hundred a year, and that would be very close work in London."

"I guess you won't be getting married just yet," said the father. "When you consider everything, you wouldn’t have five hundred a year, and that would be really tight living in London."

"It's not quite decided yet, sir. As far as I am myself concerned, I think that people are a great deal too prudent about money. I believe I could live as a married man on a hundred a year, if I had no more; and as for London, I don't see why London should be more expensive than any other place. You can get exactly what you want in London, and make your halfpence go farther there than anywhere else."

"It's not really settled yet, sir. Personally, I think people are way too cautious about money. I believe I could manage as a married man on a hundred a year, if that’s all I had; and as for London, I don’t understand why it should be more expensive than anywhere else. You can get exactly what you want in London, and stretch your pennies further there than anywhere else."

"And your sovereigns go quicker," said the rector.

"And your rulers move faster," said the rector.

"All that is wanted," said Harry, "is the will to live on your income, and a little firmness in carrying out your plans."

"All that's needed," said Harry, "is the determination to live on your income, and a bit of commitment in sticking to your plans."

The rector of Clavering, as he heard all this wisdom fall from his son's lips, looked at Harry's expensive clothes, at the ring on his finger, at the gold chain on his waistcoat, at the studs in his shirt, and smiled gently. He was by no means so clever a man as his son, but he knew something more of the world, and though not much given to general reading, he had read his son's character. "A great deal of firmness and of fortitude also is wanted for that kind of life," he said. "There are men who can go through it without suffering, but I would not advise any young man to commence it in a hurry. If I were you I should wait a year or two. Come, let's have a walk; that is, if you can tear yourself away from your lady-love for an hour. If there is not Saul coming up the avenue! Take your hat, Harry, and we'll get out the other way. He only wants to see the girls about the school, but if he catches us he'll keep us for an hour." Then Harry asked after Mr. Saul's love-affairs. "I've not heard one single word about it since you went away," said the rector. "It seems to have passed off like a dream. He and Fanny go on the same as ever, and I suppose he knows that he made a fool of himself." But in this matter the rector of Clavering was mistaken. Mr. Saul did not by any means think that he had made a fool of himself.

The rector of Clavering, as he listened to all this wisdom coming from his son's mouth, looked at Harry's expensive clothes, at the ring on his finger, at the gold chain on his waistcoat, at the studs in his shirt, and smiled gently. He wasn’t as clever as his son, but he knew a bit more about the world, and although he didn’t read much, he understood his son’s character. "A lot of determination and strength is needed for that kind of life," he said. "There are men who can handle it without suffering, but I wouldn’t recommend any young man rush into it. If I were you, I would wait a year or two. Come on, let’s take a walk; that is, if you can pull yourself away from your lady-love for an hour. Is that Saul coming up the avenue? Grab your hat, Harry, and we’ll head out the other way. He just wants to see the girls at the school, but if he spots us, he’ll keep us for an hour." Then Harry inquired about Mr. Saul’s romantic life. "I haven’t heard a word about it since you left," said the rector. "It seems to have faded away like a dream. He and Fanny are still the same as ever, and I assume he realizes he made a fool of himself." But in this regard, the rector of Clavering was mistaken. Mr. Saul certainly didn’t think he had made a fool of himself.

"He has never spoken a word to me since," said Fanny to her brother that evening; "that is, not a word as to what occurred then. Of course it was very embarrassing at first, though I don't think he minded it much. He came after a day or two just the same as ever, and he almost made me think that he had forgotten it."

"He hasn't said a word to me since," Fanny told her brother that evening. "I mean, not a word about what happened then. It was really awkward at first, but I don't think he was too bothered by it. He came back a day or two later just like before, and he almost made me feel like he had forgotten about it."

"And he wasn't confused?"

"And he wasn't puzzled?"

"Not at all. He never is. The only difference is that I think he scolds me more than he used to do."

"Not at all. He never is. The only difference is that I feel like he scolds me more than he used to."

"Scold you!"

"You're in trouble!"

"Oh dear, yes; he always scolded me if he thought there was anything wrong, especially about giving the children holidays. But he does it now more than ever."

"Oh dear, yes; he always yelled at me if he thought there was anything wrong, especially about giving the kids time off. But he does it even more now."

"And how do you bear it?"

"And how do you handle it?"

"In a half-and-half sort of way. I laugh at him, and then do as I'm bid. He makes everybody do what he bids them at Clavering,—except papa, sometimes. But he scolds him, too. I heard him the other day in the library."

"In a sort of mixed way. I laugh at him, and then I do what he asks. He gets everyone at Clavering to do his bidding—except for Dad, sometimes. But he scolds him, too. I overheard him the other day in the library."

"And did my father take it from him?"

"And did my dad take it from him?"

"He did, in a sort of a way. I don't think papa likes him; but then he knows, and we all know, that he is so good. He never spares himself in anything. He has nothing but his curacy, and what he gives away is wonderful."

"He did, in a way. I don't think Dad likes him; but then he knows, and we all know, that he’s really good. He never holds back in anything. He has nothing but his church position, and what he gives away is amazing."

"I hope he won't take to scolding me," said Harry, proudly.

"I hope he doesn't start scolding me," said Harry, proudly.

"As you don't concern yourself about the parish, I should say that you're safe. I suppose he thinks mamma does everything right, for he never scolds her."

"As you don’t worry about the parish, I’d say you’re in the clear. I guess he believes mom does everything perfectly, since he never gets on her case."

"There is no talk of his going away."

"There’s no discussion about him leaving."

"None at all. I think we should all be sorry, because he does so much good."

"Not at all. I think we should all feel sorry, because he does a lot of good."

Florence reigned supreme in the estimation of the rectory family all the evening of her arrival and till after breakfast the next morning, but then the bride elect was restored to her natural pre-eminence. This, however, lasted only for two days, after which the bride was taken away. The wedding was very nice, and pretty, and comfortable; and the people of Clavering were much better satisfied with it than they had been with that other marriage which has been mentioned as having been celebrated in Clavering Church. The rectory family was generally popular, and everybody wished well to the daughter who was being given away. When they were gone there was a breakfast at the rectory, and speeches were made with much volubility. On such an occasion the rector was a great man, and Harry also shone in conspicuous rivalry with his father. But Mr. Saul's spirit was not so well tuned to the occasion as that of the rector or his son, and when he got upon his legs, and mournfully expressed a hope that his friend Mr. Fielding might be enabled to bear the trials of this life with fortitude, it was felt by them all that the speaking had better be brought to an end.

Florence was the center of attention with the rectory family all through the evening of her arrival and until after breakfast the next day, but then the soon-to-be bride returned to her rightful place. However, this didn’t last long; just two days later, the bride was taken away. The wedding was lovely, attractive, and enjoyable; the people of Clavering were much more pleased with it than they had been with the other marriage previously mentioned that took place in Clavering Church. The rectory family was well-liked, and everyone wished the best for the daughter who was getting married. Once they left, there was a breakfast at the rectory, and speeches were made energetically. On occasions like this, the rector was quite the prominent figure, and Harry also stood out, competing with his father. But Mr. Saul wasn't quite in sync with the mood of the occasion like the rector and his son, and when he stood up and sadly expressed a hope that his friend Mr. Fielding might manage the challenges of life with strength, everyone sensed it was better to wrap up the speeches.

"You shouldn't laugh at him, Harry," Fanny said to her brother afterwards, almost seriously. "One man can do one thing and one another. You can make a speech better than he can, but I don't think you could preach so good a sermon."

"You shouldn't laugh at him, Harry," Fanny said to her brother later, almost seriously. "One person can do one thing and another person can do something else. You can give a speech better than he can, but I don't think you could preach a sermon as well as he does."

"I declare I think you're getting fond of him after all," said Harry. Upon hearing this Fanny turned away with a look of great offence. "No one but a brother," said she, "would say such a thing as that to me, because I don't like to hear the poor man ridiculed without cause." That evening, when they were alone, Fanny told Florence the whole story about Mr. Saul. "I tell you, you know, because you're like one of ourselves now. It has never been mentioned to any one out of the family."

"I honestly think you're starting to like him after all," said Harry. Fanny turned away, looking very offended upon hearing this. "Only a brother would say something like that to me," she replied, "because I don't want to hear that poor man mocked without reason." That evening, when they were alone, Fanny shared the entire story about Mr. Saul with Florence. "I'm telling you this because you're basically one of us now. It's never been mentioned to anyone outside the family."

Florence declared that the story would be sacred with her.

Florence declared that the story would hold special significance for her.

"I'm sure of that, dear, and therefore I like you to know it. Of course such a thing was quite out of the question. The poor fellow has no means at all,—literally none. And then, independently of that—"

"I'm sure of that, dear, and that's why I want you to know it. Of course, that kind of thing was totally out of the question. The poor guy has no money at all—literally none. And then, aside from that—"

"I don't think I should ever bring myself to think of that as the first thing," said Florence.

"I don’t think I should ever allow myself to think of that as the first thing," said Florence.

"No, nor would I. If I really were attached to a man, I think I would tell him so, and agree to wait, either with hope or without it."

"No, I wouldn't either. If I were genuinely attached to a guy, I think I would let him know and agree to wait, whether I'd hope for it or not."

"Just so, Fanny."

"Exactly, Fanny."

"But there was nothing of that kind; and, indeed, he's the sort of man that no girl would think of being in love with,—isn't he? You see he will hardly take the trouble to dress himself decently."

"But there was nothing like that; and, honestly, he's the kind of guy no girl would ever consider falling for—right? You see, he barely even puts in the effort to dress himself properly."

"I have only seen him at a wedding, you know."

"I've only seen him at a wedding, you know."

"And for him he was quite bright. But you will see plenty of him if you will go to the schools with me. And indeed he comes here a great deal, quite as much as he did before that happened. He is so good, Florence!"

"And for him, he was really smart. But you'll get to see a lot of him if you come to school with me. And honestly, he's here a lot, just as much as he was before that happened. He is so great, Florence!"

"Poor man!"

"Poor guy!"

"I can't in the least make out from his manner whether he has given up thinking about it. I suppose he has. Indeed, of course he has, because he must know that it would be of no sort of use. But he is one of those men of whom you can never say whether they are happy or not; and you never can be quite sure what may be in his mind."

"I can’t tell at all from his behavior whether he’s stopped thinking about it. I guess he has. Of course he has, because he must realize that it wouldn’t do any good. But he’s one of those guys you can never figure out whether they’re happy or not; and you can never be completely sure what’s going on in his head."

"He is not bound to the place at all,—not like your father?"

"He isn't tied to the place at all—unlike your father?"

"Oh, no," said Fanny, thinking perhaps that Mr. Saul might find himself to be bound to the place, though not exactly with bonds similar to those which kept her father there.

"Oh, no," said Fanny, thinking that Mr. Saul might feel pressured to stay in the place, though not exactly with the same ties that kept her father there.

"If he found himself to be unhappy, he could go," said Florence.

"If he was unhappy, he could leave," said Florence.

"Oh, yes; he could go if he were unhappy," said Fanny. "That is, he could go if he pleased."

"Oh, yeah; he could leave if he wanted to," said Fanny. "I mean, he could leave if he felt like it."

Lady Clavering had come to the wedding; but no one else had been present from the great house. Sir Hugh, indeed, was not at home; but, as the rector truly observed, he might have been at home if he had so pleased. "But he is a man," said the father to the son, "who always does a rude thing if it be in his power. For myself, I care nothing for him, as he knows. But he thinks that Mary would have liked to have seen him as the head of the family, and therefore he does not come. He has greater skill in making himself odious than any man I ever knew. As for her, they say he's leading her a terrible life. And he's becoming so stingy about money, too!"

Lady Clavering had attended the wedding, but no one else from the big house had come. Sir Hugh, in fact, wasn't home; however, as the rector rightly pointed out, he could have been if he had wanted to. "But he is a man," the father said to the son, "who always does something rude if he can. Personally, I don’t care about him, as he knows. But he thinks that Mary would have liked to see him as the head of the family, which is why he doesn't show up. He’s better at being unpleasant than anyone I’ve ever met. As for her, they say he’s making her life miserable. And he’s getting really cheap about money too!"

"I hear that Archie is very heavy on him."

"I hear that Archie is really putting a lot of pressure on him."

"I don't believe that he would allow any man to be heavy on him, as you call it. Archie has means of his own, and I suppose has not run through them yet. If Hugh has advanced him money, you may be sure that he has security. As for Archie, he will come to an end very soon, if what I hear is true. They tell me he is always at Newmarket, and that he always loses."

"I don’t think he would let anyone weigh him down, like you say. Archie has his own resources, and I assume he hasn’t spent them all yet. If Hugh has given him money, you can be sure he has collateral. As for Archie, he won’t last much longer if what I’m hearing is correct. People say he’s always at Newmarket, and that he always loses."

But though Sir Hugh was thus uncourteous to the rector and to the rector's daughter, he was so far prepared to be civil to his cousin Harry, that he allowed his wife to ask all the rectory family to dine up at the house, in honour of Harry's sweetheart. Florence Burton was specially invited with Lady Clavering's sweetest smile. Florence, of course, referred the matter to her hostess, but it was decided that they should all accept the invitation. It was given, personally, after the breakfast, and it is not always easy to decline invitations so given. It may, I think, be doubted whether any man or woman has a right to give an invitation in this way, and whether all invitations so given should not be null and void, from the fact of the unfair advantage that has been taken. The man who fires at a sitting bird is known to be no sportsman. Now, the dinner-giver who catches his guest in an unguarded moment, and bags him when he has had no chance to rise upon his wing, does fire at a sitting bird. In this instance, however, Lady Clavering's little speeches were made only to Mrs. Clavering and to Florence. She said nothing personally to the rector, and he therefore might have escaped. But his wife talked him over.

But even though Sir Hugh was rude to the rector and his daughter, he was willing to be polite to his cousin Harry, which is why he let his wife invite the whole rectory family over for dinner to honor Harry's girlfriend. Florence Burton was specially invited with Lady Clavering's sweetest smile. Florence, of course, turned to her hostess for guidance, but they decided to accept the invitation. It was personally extended after breakfast, and it's not always easy to turn down invitations given like that. I think we can question whether anyone truly has the right to issue an invitation in this manner, and whether all such invitations should be considered invalid due to the unfair advantage taken. A man who shoots at a resting bird is not considered a true sportsman. Similarly, the dinner host who catches his guest off guard and “bags” them when they have no chance to escape is essentially shooting at a sitting bird. In this case, though, Lady Clavering's little speeches were only made to Mrs. Clavering and Florence. She said nothing directly to the rector, so he might have gotten away. But his wife convinced him.

"I think you should go for Harry's sake," said Mrs. Clavering.

"I think you should go for Harry's sake," Mrs. Clavering said.

"I don't see what good it will do Harry."

"I don't see how that will help Harry."

"It will show that you approve of the match."

"It will show that you support the relationship."

"I don't approve or disapprove of it. He's his own master."

"I neither approve nor disapprove of it. He's in control of his own life."

"But you do approve, you know, as you countenance it; and there cannot possibly be a sweeter girl than Florence Burton. We all like her, and I'm sure you seem to take to her thoroughly."

"But you do approve, you know, since you allow it; and there can't possibly be a sweeter girl than Florence Burton. We all like her, and I'm sure you really seem to take to her."

"Take to her; yes, I take to her very well. She's ladylike, and though she's no beauty, she looks pretty, and is spirited. And I daresay she's clever."

"Get to know her; yes, I get along with her really well. She's classy, and even though she's not a traditional beauty, she looks nice and has a lively personality. And I must say she's smart."

"And so good."

"And it’s great."

"If she's good, that's better than all. Only I don't see what they're to live on."

"If she's doing well, that's worth more than anything else. It's just that I can't figure out what they'll survive on."

"But as she is here, you will go with us to the great house?"

"But since she is here, will you join us at the big house?"

Mrs. Clavering never asked her husband anything in vain, and the rector agreed to go. He apologized for this afterwards to his son by explaining that he did it as a duty. "It will serve for six months," he said. "If I did not go there about once in six months, there would be supposed to be a family quarrel, and that would be bad for the parish."

Mrs. Clavering never made a request to her husband that went unanswered, and the rector agreed to go. He later explained to his son that he did it out of obligation. "It only has to happen every six months," he said. "If I didn't go there at least once every six months, people would think there's family drama, and that would be bad for the parish."

Harry was to remain only a week at Clavering, and the dinner was to take place the evening before he went away. On that morning he walked all round the park with Florence,—as he had before often walked with Julia,—and took that occasion of giving her a full history of the Clavering family. "We none of us like my cousin Hugh," he had said. "But she is at least harmless, and she means to be good-natured. She is very unlike her sister, Lady Ongar."

Harry was only supposed to stay at Clavering for a week, and the dinner was set for the evening before he left. That morning, he strolled around the park with Florence—as he had previously done with Julia—and used that time to give her a complete history of the Clavering family. "None of us really like my cousin Hugh," he said. "But she’s at least harmless, and she intends to be friendly. She is very different from her sister, Lady Ongar."

"So I should suppose, from what you have told me."

"So I guess, based on what you've told me."

"Altogether an inferior being."

"Overall a lesser being."

"And she has only one child."

"And she has just one child."

"Only one,—a boy now two years old. They say he's anything but strong."

"Just one—a boy who's now two years old. They say he’s definitely not strong."

"And Sir Hugh has one brother."

"And Sir Hugh has one brother."

"Yes; Archie Clavering. I think Archie is a worse fellow even than Hugh. He makes more attempts to be agreeable, but there is something in his eye which I always distrust. And then he is a man who does no good in the world to anybody."

"Yeah; Archie Clavering. I think Archie is even worse than Hugh. He tries harder to be likable, but there’s something in his eyes that I always don’t trust. Plus, he’s the kind of guy who doesn’t do any good for anyone in the world."

"He's not married?"

"Is he not married?"

"No; he's not married, and I don't suppose he ever will marry. It's on the cards, Florence, that the future baronet may be—" Then she frowned on him, walked on quickly, and changed the conversation.

"No, he's not married, and I don't think he ever will be. It's possible, Florence, that the future baronet might —" Then she frowned at him, walked on quickly, and changed the subject.

 

 

CHAPTER XI.

SIR HUGH AND HIS BROTHER ARCHIE.

There was a numerous gathering of Claverings in the drawing-room of the Great House when the family from the rectory arrived comprising three generations; for the nurse was in the room holding the heir in her arms. Mrs. Clavering and Fanny of course inspected the child at once, as they were bound to do, while Lady Clavering welcomed Florence Burton. Archie spoke a word or two to his uncle, and Sir Hugh vouchsafed to give one finger to his cousin Harry by way of shaking hands with him. Then there came a feeble squeak from the infant, and there was a cloud at once upon Sir Hugh's brow. "Hermione," he said, "I wish you wouldn't have the child in here. It's not the place for him. He's always cross. I've said a dozen times I wouldn't have him down here just before dinner." Then a sign was made to the nurse, and she walked off with her burden. It was a poor, rickety, unalluring bairn, but it was all that Lady Clavering had, and she would fain have been allowed to show it to her relatives, as other mothers are allowed to do.

There was a large gathering of the Clavering family in the drawing room of the Great House when the family from the rectory arrived, consisting of three generations; the nurse was in the room, holding the heir in her arms. Mrs. Clavering and Fanny immediately went to check out the child, as was expected, while Lady Clavering greeted Florence Burton. Archie exchanged a few words with his uncle, and Sir Hugh offered one finger to his cousin Harry as a way of shaking hands with him. Then there came a weak little squeak from the baby, and Sir Hugh's expression darkened immediately. "Hermione," he said, "I really wish you wouldn't bring the child in here. It's not the right place for him. He's always fussy. I've said a dozen times I wouldn't have him down here just before dinner." Then a signal was given to the nurse, and she left with her charge. It was a frail, unappealing baby, but it was all Lady Clavering had, and she would have liked to show it off to her relatives, like other mothers do.

"Hugh," said his wife, "shall I introduce you to Miss Burton?"

"Hugh," his wife said, "would you like me to introduce you to Miss Burton?"

Then Sir Hugh came forward and shook hands with his new guest, with some sort of apology for his remissness, while Harry stood by, glowering at him, with offence in his eye. "My father is right," he had said to himself when his cousin failed to notice Florence on her first entrance into the room; "he is impertinent as well as disagreeable. I don't care for quarrels in the parish, and so I shall let him know."

Then Sir Hugh stepped forward and shook hands with his new guest, offering some kind of apology for being negligent, while Harry stood by, glaring at him, clearly offended. "My dad is right," he thought to himself when his cousin ignored Florence as she entered the room; "he’s rude as well as unpleasant. I’m not into fights in the community, so I’ll make sure he knows."

"Upon my word she's a doosed good-looking little thing," said Archie, coming up to him, after having also shaken hands with her;—"doosed good-looking, I call her."

"Honestly, she's a really attractive girl," said Archie, walking over to him after also shaking hands with her;—"really attractive, I think."

"I'm glad you think so," said Harry, drily.

"I'm glad you think that," Harry said dryly.

"Let's see; where was it you picked her up? I did hear, but I forget."

"Let me think, where did you pick her up? I heard about it, but I can't remember."

"I picked her up, as you call it, at Stratton, where her father lives."

"I picked her up, as you would say, at Stratton, where her father lives."

"Oh, yes; I know. He's the fellow that coached you in your new business, isn't he? By-the-by, Harry, I think you've made a mess of it in changing your line. I'd have stuck to my governor's shop if I'd been you. You'd got through all the d——d fag of it, and there's the living that has always belonged to a Clavering."

"Oh, yes; I know. He's the guy who coached you in your new business, right? By the way, Harry, I think you really messed up by changing your path. I would have stuck with my dad's shop if I were you. You had already gone through all the tough stuff, and there's the livelihood that has always belonged to a Clavering."

"What would your brother have said if I had asked him to give it to me?"

"What would your brother have said if I had asked him to give it to me?"

"He wouldn't have given it of course. Nobody does give anything to anybody now-a-days. Livings are a sort of thing that people buy. But you'd have got it under favourable circumstances."

"He wouldn't have given it, of course. Nobody gives anything to anyone these days. Jobs are something people buy. But you would have gotten it under better circumstances."

"The fact is, Archie, I'm not very fond of the church, as a profession."

"The truth is, Archie, I'm not really a fan of the church as a profession."

"I should have thought it easy work. Look at your father. He keeps a curate and doesn't take any trouble himself. Upon my word, if I'd known as much then as I do now, I'd have had a shy for it myself. Hugh couldn't have refused it to me."

"I thought it would be an easy job. Just look at your dad. He has a curate and doesn’t bother doing anything himself. Honestly, if I had known then what I know now, I would have asked for it myself. Hugh wouldn’t have turned me down."

"But Hugh can't give it while his uncle holds it."

"But Hugh can't give it as long as his uncle is holding it."

"That would have been against me to be sure, and your governor's life is pretty nearly as good as mine. I shouldn't have liked waiting; so I suppose it's as well as it is."

"That probably would have been a setback for me, and your governor's life is almost as valuable as mine. I wouldn't have enjoyed waiting, so I guess it's for the best as it is."

There may perhaps have been other reasons why Archie Clavering's regrets that he did not take holy orders were needless. He had never succeeded in learning anything that any master had ever attempted to teach him, although he had shown considerable aptitude in picking up acquirements for which no regular masters are appointed. He knew the fathers and mothers,—sires and dams I ought perhaps to say,—and grandfathers and grandmothers, and so back for some generations, of all the horses of note living in his day. He knew also the circumstances of all races,—what horses would run at them, and at what ages, what were the stakes, the periods of running, and the special interests of each affair. But not, on that account, should it be thought that the turf had been profitable to him. That it might become profitable at some future time, was possible; but Captain Archibald Clavering had not yet reached the profitable stage in the career of a betting man, though perhaps he was beginning to qualify himself for it. He was not bad-looking, though his face was unprepossessing to a judge of character. He was slight and well made, about five feet nine in height, with light brown hair, which had already left the top of his head bald, with slight whiskers, and a well-formed moustache. But the peculiarity of his face was in his eyes. His eyebrows were light-coloured and very slight, and this was made more apparent by the skin above the eyes, which was loose and hung down over the outside corners of them, giving him a look of cunning which was disagreeable. He seemed always to be speculating, counting up the odds, and calculating whether anything could be done with the events then present before him. And he was always ready to make a bet, being ever provided with a book for that purpose. He would take the odds that the sun did not rise on the morrow, and would either win the bet or wrangle in the losing of it. He would wrangle, but would do so noiselessly, never on such occasions damaging his cause by a loud voice. He was now about thirty-three years of age, and was two years younger than the baronet. Sir Hugh was not a gambler like his brother, but I do not know that he was therefore a more estimable man. He was greedy and anxious to increase his store, never willing to lose that which he possessed, fond of pleasure, but very careful of himself in the enjoyment of it, handsome, every inch an English gentleman in appearance, and therefore popular with men and women of his own class who were not near enough to him to know him well, given to but few words, proud of his name, and rank, and place, well versed in the business of the world, a match for most men in money matters, not ignorant, though he rarely opened a book, selfish, and utterly regardless of the feelings of all those with whom he came in contact. Such were Sir Hugh Clavering and his brother the captain.

There might have been other reasons why Archie Clavering regretted not becoming a priest, but those regrets were unnecessary. He had never managed to learn anything that any teacher had tried to teach him, even though he had shown a lot of talent in picking up skills that didn't require formal instructors. He knew the names of the fathers and mothers—sire and dam, I should probably say—and grandfathers and grandmothers, tracing back several generations, of all the notable horses of his time. He also understood all the details of the races—what horses were running, at what ages, the stakes, the schedule, and the unique details of each event. But just because he knew all that didn't mean the horse racing scene had been profitable for him. It could become profitable at some point in the future, but Captain Archibald Clavering hadn't reached that profitable level in his betting career yet, although he might be starting to prepare himself for it. He wasn't bad-looking, though his face didn’t give a great impression to someone assessing his character. He was slim and well-built, about five feet nine, with light brown hair that was already thinning on top, slight sideburns, and a well-groomed mustache. The most notable thing about his face was his eyes. His eyebrows were light and very faint, which was made even more noticeable by the loose skin on his eyelids that drooped over the outer corners, giving him an unsettling look of cunning. He always seemed to be calculating, weighing the odds, and figuring out if he could take advantage of the situations in front of him. He was always ready to place a bet, always carrying a notebook for that purpose. He would bet that the sun wouldn’t rise the next day, and whether or not he won, he’d argue about it. He would argue, but quietly, never hurting his case with a loud voice. He was now about thirty-three years old, two years younger than the baronet. Sir Hugh wasn’t a gambler like his brother, but I can’t say that made him a better man. He was greedy and eager to grow his wealth, never willing to part with anything he had, enjoyed pleasure, but was very careful about how he indulged, handsome, every bit an English gentleman in appearance, making him popular among men and women of his class who didn’t know him well enough to see through him. He spoke little, was proud of his name, rank, and status, was savvy in business matters, could match most men in financial discussions, wasn’t ignorant, even though he rarely picked up a book, selfish, and completely indifferent to the feelings of those around him. Such were Sir Hugh Clavering and his brother, the captain.

Sir Hugh took Florence in to dinner, and when the soup had been eaten made an attempt to talk to her. "How long have you been here, Miss Burton?"

Sir Hugh took Florence in to dinner, and when they had finished the soup, he tried to strike up a conversation with her. "How long have you been here, Miss Burton?"

"Nearly a week," said Florence.

"Almost a week," said Florence.

"Ah;—you came to the wedding; I was sorry I couldn't be here. It went off very well, I suppose?"

"Ah—you made it to the wedding; I wish I could have been here. I’m guessing it went really well?"

"Very well indeed, I think."

"Sounds good to me."

"They're tiresome things in general,—weddings. Don't you think so?"

"They're annoying events in general—weddings. Don't you agree?"

"Oh dear, no,—except that some person one loves is always being taken away."

"Oh no, not at all—except that someone you love is always being taken away."

"You'll be the next person to be taken away yourself, I suppose?"

"You'll be the next one taken away, right?"

"I must be the next person at home, because I am the last that is left. All my sisters are married."

"I have to be the next one at home because I’m the only one left. All my sisters are married."

"And how many are there?"

"And how many are there?"

"There are five married."

"There are five married couples."

"Good heavens—five!"

"Wow—five!"

"And they are all married to men in the same profession as Harry."

"And they are all married to men who work in the same field as Harry."

"Quite a family affair," said Sir Hugh. Harry, who was sitting on the other side of Florence, heard this, and would have preferred that Florence should have said nothing about her sisters. "Why, Harry," said the baronet, "if you will go into partnership with your father-in-law and all your brothers-in-law you could stand against the world."

"Quite a family gathering," said Sir Hugh. Harry, who was sitting on the other side of Florence, heard this and wished Florence hadn't mentioned her sisters. "Well, Harry," said the baronet, "if you teamed up with your father-in-law and all your brothers-in-law, you could take on the world."

"You might add my four brothers," said Florence, who saw no shame in the fact that they were all engaged in the same business.

"You might include my four brothers," said Florence, who felt no embarrassment about the fact that they were all in the same line of work.

"Good heaven!" exclaimed Sir Hugh, and after that he did not say much more to Florence.

"Wow!" exclaimed Sir Hugh, and after that, he didn't say much more to Florence.

The rector had taken Lady Clavering in to dinner, and they two did manage to carry on between them some conversation respecting the parish affairs. Lady Clavering was not active among the poor,—nor was the rector himself, and perhaps neither of them knew how little the other did; but they could talk Clavering talk, and the parson was willing to take for granted his neighbour's good will to make herself agreeable. But Mrs. Clavering, who sat between Sir Hugh and Archie, had a very bad time of it. Sir Hugh spoke to her once during the dinner, saying that he hoped she was satisfied with her daughter's marriage; but even this he said in a tone that seemed to imply that any such satisfaction must rest on very poor grounds. "Thoroughly satisfied," said Mrs. Clavering, drawing herself up and looking very unlike the usual Mrs. Clavering of the rectory. After that there was no further conversation between her and Sir Hugh. "The worst of him to me is always this," she said that evening to her husband, "that he puts me so much out of conceit with myself. If I were with him long I should begin to find myself the most disagreeable woman in England!" "Then pray don't be with him long," said the rector.

The rector had taken Lady Clavering to dinner, and they managed to have some conversation about parish matters. Lady Clavering wasn't actively involved with the poor—nor was the rector, and maybe neither of them realized how little the other did; but they could talk the usual Clavering talk, and the parson was happy to assume his neighbor's good intentions to be pleasant. However, Mrs. Clavering, who sat between Sir Hugh and Archie, had a rough time. Sir Hugh spoke to her once during dinner, asking if she was happy with her daughter's marriage; even then, his tone suggested that any such happiness was based on pretty weak reasons. "Thoroughly satisfied," Mrs. Clavering replied, straightening up and looking very different from her usual self at the rectory. After that, there was no more conversation between her and Sir Hugh. "The worst part about him for me is that he always makes me feel bad about myself," she told her husband that evening, "If I spent too much time with him, I'd start to think I was the most unpleasant woman in England!" "Then please don't spend too much time with him," said the rector.

But Archie made conversation throughout dinner, and added greatly to Mrs. Clavering's troubles by doing so. There was nothing in common between them, but still Archie went on laboriously with his work. It was a duty which he recognized, and at which he would work hard. When he had used up Mary's marriage, a subject which he economized carefully, so that he brought it down to the roast saddle of mutton, he began upon Harry's match. When was it to be? Where were they to live? Was there any money? What manner of people were the Burtons? Perhaps he might get over it? This he whispered very lowly, and it was the question next in sequence to that about the money. When, in answer to this, Mrs. Clavering with considerable energy declared that anything of that kind would be a misfortune of which there seemed to be no chance whatever, he recovered himself as he thought very skilfully. "Oh, yes; of course; that's just what I meant;—a doosed nice girl I think her;—a doosed nice girl, all round." Archie's questions were very laborious to his fellow-labourer in his conversation because he never allowed one of them to pass without an answer. He always recognized the fact that he was working hard on behalf of society, and, as he used to say himself, that he had no idea of pulling all the coach up the hill by his own shoulders. Whenever therefore he had made his effort he waited for his companion's, looking closely into her face, cunningly driving her on, so that she also should pull her share of the coach. Before dinner was over Mrs. Clavering found the hill to be very steep, and the coach to be very heavy. "I'll bet you seven to one," said he,—and this was his parting speech as Mrs. Clavering rose up at Lady Clavering's nod,—"I'll bet you seven to one, that the whole box and dice of them are married before me,—or at any rate as soon; and I don't mean to remain single much longer, I can tell you." The "box and dice of them" was supposed to comprise Harry, Florence, Fanny, and Lady Ongar, of all of whom mention had been made, and that saving clause,—"at any rate as soon,"—was cunningly put in, as it had occurred to Archie that he perhaps might be married on the same day as one of those other persons. But Mrs. Clavering was not compelled either to accept or reject the bet, as she was already moving before the terms had been fully explained to her.

But Archie kept chatting throughout dinner, and really added to Mrs. Clavering's stress by doing so. They had nothing in common, but Archie continued to labor over his conversation. He saw it as a duty and put in the effort. After he had exhausted the topic of Mary's marriage—a subject he handled carefully, making sure to save it for the roast saddle of mutton—he started asking about Harry's engagement. When was it happening? Where would they live? Was there any money involved? What kind of people were the Burtons? Maybe he could get over it? He whispered this very quietly, as it was the next question after the one about the money. When Mrs. Clavering firmly stated that any such thing would be a misfortune that seemed highly unlikely, he quickly recovered, thinking he was being quite clever. "Oh, yes; of course; that's exactly what I meant;—she's a really nice girl, I think;—a really nice girl, overall." Archie's questions were quite taxing for his conversation partner because he insisted on having an answer for each one. He recognized that he was working hard for the good of society and, as he often said, he had no intention of pulling the whole weight by himself. So, after making his effort, he would wait for her response, studying her face and subtly encouraging her to share the load. By the end of dinner, Mrs. Clavering felt the hill was steep and the coach very heavy. "I'll bet you seven to one," he said—this was his parting remark as Mrs. Clavering stood up at Lady Clavering's signal—"I'll bet you seven to one that everyone is married before I am—or at least just as soon; and I don’t plan to stay single much longer, I can tell you." The "everyone" referred to Harry, Florence, Fanny, and Lady Ongar, all of whom had been mentioned, and the added clause—"or at least just as soon"—was slyly included since it occurred to Archie that he might get married on the same day as one of those others. But Mrs. Clavering wasn't forced to accept or reject the bet since she was already moving before he could fully explain the terms.

Lady Clavering as she went out of the room stopped a moment behind Harry's chair and whispered a word to him. "I want to speak to you before you go to-night." Then she passed on.

Lady Clavering paused briefly behind Harry's chair as she left the room and whispered to him, "I need to talk to you before you leave tonight." Then she moved on.

"What's that Hermione was saying?" asked Sir Hugh, when he had shut the door.

"What's that Hermione was saying?" Sir Hugh asked after closing the door.

"She only told me that she wanted to speak to me."

"She just said she wanted to talk to me."

"She has always got some cursed secret," said Sir Hugh. "If there is anything I hate, it's a secret." Now this was hardly fair, for Sir Hugh was a man very secret in his own affairs, never telling his wife anything about them. He kept two banker's accounts so that no banker's clerk might know how he stood as regarded ready money, and hardly treated even his lawyer with confidence.

"She's always got some damn secret," said Sir Hugh. "If there's anything I hate, it's a secret." Now, this wasn't exactly fair because Sir Hugh was quite secretive about his own matters, never sharing anything with his wife. He maintained two bank accounts so that no bank clerk would know how much cash he had on hand, and he rarely treated even his lawyer with any level of trust.

He did not move from his own chair, so that, after dinner, his uncle was not next to him. The places left by the ladies were not closed up, and the table was very uncomfortable.

He stayed in his own chair, so after dinner, his uncle wasn’t sitting beside him. The spots left by the ladies weren’t filled, and the table felt really awkward.

"I see they're going to have another week after this with the Pytchley," said Sir Hugh to his brother.

"I see they're going to have another week with the Pytchley after this," Sir Hugh said to his brother.

"I suppose they will,—or ten days. Things ain't very early this year."

"I guess they will—or ten days. Things aren't very early this year."

"I think I shall go down. It's never any use trying to hunt here after the middle of March."

"I think I’ll head down. It’s no use trying to hunt here after mid-March."

"You're rather short of foxes, are you not?" said the rector, making an attempt to join the conversation.

"You're pretty low on foxes, aren't you?" said the rector, trying to join the conversation.

"Upon my word I don't know anything about it," said Sir Hugh.

"Honestly, I have no idea about it," said Sir Hugh.

"There are foxes at Clavering," said Archie, recommencing his duty. "The hounds will be here on Saturday, and I'll bet three to one I find a fox before twelve o'clock, or, say, half-past twelve,—that is, if they'll draw punctually and let me do as I like with the pack. I'll bet a guinea we find, and a guinea we run, and a guinea we kill; that is, you know, if they'll really look for a fox."

"There are foxes at Clavering," Archie said, getting back to his job. "The hounds will be here on Saturday, and I’d bet three to one that I’ll find a fox before noon, or let's say, half-past twelve—if they draw promptly and let me handle the pack the way I want. I’ll bet a guinea that we find one, a guinea that we get it running, and a guinea that we catch it; that is, if they actually go looking for a fox."

The rector had been willing to fall into a little hunting talk for the sake of society, but he was not prepared to go the length that Archie proposed to take him, and therefore the subject dropped.

The rector was open to chatting a bit about hunting to keep things social, but he wasn’t ready to go as far as Archie wanted him to, so the topic faded away.

"At any rate I shan't stay here after to-morrow," said Sir Hugh, still addressing himself to his brother. "Pass the wine, will you, Harry; that is, if your father is drinking any."

"Anyway, I won't be staying here after tomorrow," said Sir Hugh, still talking to his brother. "Could you pass the wine, Harry; that is, if your dad is having any."

"No more wine for me," said the rector, almost angrily.

"No more wine for me," the rector said, almost angrily.

"Liberty Hall," said Sir Hugh; "everybody does as they like about that. I mean to have another bottle of claret. Archie, ring the bell, will you?" Captain Clavering, though he was further from the bell than his elder brother, got up and did as he was bid. The claret came, and was drunk almost in silence. The rector, though he had a high opinion of the cellar of the great house, would take none of the new bottle, because he was angry. Harry filled his glass, and attempted to say something. Sir Hugh answered him by a monosyllable, and Archie offered to bet him two to one that he was wrong.

"Liberty Hall," said Sir Hugh; "everyone does what they want there. I’m going to have another bottle of claret. Archie, please ring the bell, will you?" Captain Clavering, even though he was further from the bell than his older brother, got up and did as he was asked. The claret arrived, and they drank it almost in silence. The rector, despite having a high opinion of the great house's cellar, refused to take any from the new bottle because he was upset. Harry filled his glass and tried to say something. Sir Hugh responded with a one-word answer, and Archie offered to bet him two to one that he was wrong.

"I'll go into the drawing-room," said the rector, getting up.

"I'll head to the living room," said the rector, standing up.

"All right," said Sir Hugh; "you'll find coffee there, I daresay. Has your father given up wine?" he asked, as soon as the door was closed.

"Okay," said Sir Hugh; "you'll probably find coffee over there. Has your dad given up wine?" he asked, as soon as the door was closed.

"Not that I know of," said Harry.

"Not that I know of," Harry said.

"He used to take as good a whack as any man I know. The bishop hasn't put his embargo on that as well as the hunting, I hope?" To this Harry made no answer.

"He could take a hit as well as anyone I know. I hope the bishop hasn't banned that along with the hunting, right?" Harry didn't respond to this.

"He's in the blues, I think," said Archie. "Is there anything the matter with him, Harry?"

"He's feeling down, I think," said Archie. "Is there something wrong with him, Harry?"

"Nothing as far as I know."

"Nothing, as far as I know."

"If I were left at Clavering all the year, with nothing to do, as he is, I think I should drink a good deal of wine," said Sir Hugh. "I don't know what it is,—something in the air, I suppose,—but everybody always seems to me to be dreadfully dull here. You ain't taking any wine either. Don't stop here out of ceremony, you know, if you want to go after Miss Burton." Harry took him at his word, and went after Miss Burton, leaving the brothers together over their claret.

"If I had to stay at Clavering all year with nothing to do, like he does, I think I'd end up drinking a lot of wine," Sir Hugh said. "I don't know what it is—maybe it's something in the air—but everyone here just seems really boring to me. You're not having any wine either. Don’t feel obligated to stick around out of politeness if you want to go after Miss Burton." Harry took him at his word and went after Miss Burton, leaving the brothers together with their claret.

The two brothers remained drinking their wine, but they drank it in an uncomfortable fashion, not saying much to each other for the first ten minutes after the other Claverings were gone. Archie was in some degree afraid of his brother, and never offered to make any bets with him. Hugh had once put a stop to this altogether. "Archie," he had said, "pray understand that there is no money to be made out of me, at any rate not by you. If you lost money to me, you wouldn't think it necessary to pay; and I certainly shall lose none to you." The habit of proposing to bet had become with Archie so much a matter of course, that he did not generally intend any real speculation by his offers; but with his brother he had dropped even the habit. And he seldom began any conversation with Hugh unless he had some point to gain,—an advance of money to ask, or some favour to beg in the way of shooting, or the loan of a horse. On such occasions he would commence the negotiation with his usual diplomacy, not knowing any other mode of expressing his wishes; but he was aware that his brother would always detect his manœuvres, and expose them before he had got through his first preface; and, therefore, as I have said, he was afraid of Hugh.

The two brothers kept drinking their wine, but it was an awkward experience, with barely any conversation for the first ten minutes after the other Claverings had left. Archie felt somewhat intimidated by his brother and never suggested any bets. Hugh had previously put an end to that entirely. "Archie," he had said, "just so you know, there’s no money to be made off me, at least not by you. If you lost money to me, you wouldn’t think it was necessary to pay, and I certainly won’t lose any to you." Archie had gotten so used to making betting proposals that he usually didn’t mean them seriously; however, he had even stopped that habit around his brother. He rarely started a conversation with Hugh unless he had something to gain—like asking for a loan or some sort of favor involving shooting or borrowing a horse. In those moments, he would kick off the conversation with his usual tactics, as he didn’t know any other way to express what he wanted; but he knew his brother would always see through his schemes and call him out before he even finished his first sentence. So, as I mentioned, he was afraid of Hugh.

"I don't know what's come to my uncle of late," said Hugh, after a while. "I think I shall have to drop them at the rectory altogether."

"I don't know what's gotten into my uncle lately," said Hugh, after a while. "I think I might have to stop visiting them at the rectory altogether."

"He never had much to say for himself."

"He never had much to say."

"But he has a mode of expressing himself without speaking, which I do not choose to put up with at my table. The fact is they are going to the mischief at the rectory. His eldest girl has just married a curate."

"But he has a way of expressing himself without speaking, which I won't tolerate at my table. The truth is they're causing trouble at the rectory. His oldest daughter just married a curate."

"Fielding has got a living."

Fielding has a profession.

"It's something very small then, and I suppose Fanny will marry that prig they have here. My uncle himself never does any of his own work, and now Harry is going to make a fool of himself. I used to think he would fall on his legs."

"It's something really minor then, and I guess Fanny will end up marrying that jerk they have around here. My uncle never does any of his own work, and now Harry is about to embarrass himself. I used to think he would land on his feet."

"He is a clever fellow."

"He's a smart guy."

"Then why is he such a fool as to marry such a girl as this, without money, good looks, or breeding? It's well for you he is such a fool, or else you wouldn't have a chance."

"Then why is he such a fool to marry a girl like her, with no money, no looks, and no background? It's lucky for you that he's such a fool, or you wouldn't stand a chance."

"I don't see that at all," said Archie.

"I don't see that at all," Archie said.

"Julia always had a sneaking fondness for Harry, and if he had waited would have taken him now. She was very near making a fool of herself with him once, before Lord Ongar turned up."

"Julia always had a secret crush on Harry, and if he had just waited, she would have gone for him now. She almost made a fool of herself with him once, before Lord Ongar showed up."

To this Archie said nothing, but he changed colour, and it may almost be said of him that he blushed. Why he was affected in so singular a manner by his brother's words will be best explained by a statement of what took place in the back drawing-room a little later in the evening.

To this, Archie said nothing, but he changed color, and you could almost say he blushed. The reason he was affected so uniquely by his brother's words will be best explained by what happened in the back drawing-room a little later in the evening.

When Harry reached the drawing-room he went up to Lady Clavering, but she said nothing to him then of especial notice. She was talking to Mrs. Clavering while the rector was reading,—or pretending to read,—a review, and the two girls were chattering together in another part of the room. Then they had coffee, and after awhile the two other men came in from their wine. Lady Clavering did not move at once, but she took the first opportunity of doing so, when Sir Hugh came up to Mrs. Clavering and spoke a word to her. A few minutes after that Harry found himself closeted with Lady Clavering, in a little room detached from the others, though the doors between the two were open.

When Harry got to the drawing-room, he approached Lady Clavering, but she didn’t say anything particularly noteworthy to him at that moment. She was chatting with Mrs. Clavering while the rector was reading—or pretending to read—a review, and the two girls were talking together in another corner of the room. After a while, they had coffee, and soon the two other men came in from having wine. Lady Clavering didn’t get up right away, but she seized the first chance to do so when Sir Hugh walked over to Mrs. Clavering and said a word to her. A few minutes later, Harry found himself alone with Lady Clavering in a small room separated from the others, although the doors between the two spaces were open.

"Do you know," said Lady Clavering, "that Sir Hugh has asked Julia to come here?" Harry paused a moment, and then acknowledged that he did know it.

"Did you know," Lady Clavering said, "that Sir Hugh has asked Julia to come here?" Harry paused for a moment and then admitted that he did know.

"I hope you did not advise her to refuse."

"I hope you didn't tell her to refuse."

"I advise her! Oh dear, no. She did not ask me anything about it."

"I give her advice! Oh no, she didn't ask me anything about it."

"But she has refused. Don't you think she has been very wrong?"

"But she has declined. Don't you think she's made a big mistake?"

"It is hard to say," said Harry. "You know I thought it very cruel that Hugh did not receive her immediately on her return. If I had been him I should have gone to Paris to meet her."

"It’s tough to say," Harry said. "I really thought it was pretty mean that Hugh didn’t welcome her right away when she got back. If I were him, I would have traveled to Paris to meet her."

"It's no good talking of that now, Harry. Hugh is hard, and we all know that. Who feels it most, do you think; Julia or I? But as he has come round, what can she gain by standing off? Will it not be the best thing for her to come here?"

"It's pointless to discuss that now, Harry. Hugh is tough, and we all know it. Who do you think feels it more, Julia or me? But since he's come around, what does she have to gain by keeping her distance? Wouldn't it be best for her to come here?"

"I don't know that she has much to gain by it."

"I don't think she has much to gain from it."

"Harry,—do you know that we have a plan?" "Who is we?" Harry asked; but she went on without noticing his question. "I tell you, because I believe you can help us more than any one, if you will. Only for your engagement with Miss Burton I should not mention it to you; and, but for that, the plan would, I daresay, be of no use."

"Harry, do you know we have a plan?" "Who’s 'we'?" Harry asked; but she continued without acknowledging his question. "I'm telling you because I believe you can help us more than anyone else, if you're willing. If it weren't for your engagement to Miss Burton, I wouldn't mention this to you; and honestly, without that, the plan probably wouldn't matter."

"What is the plan?" said Harry, very gravely. A vague idea of what the plan might be had come across Harry's mind during Lady Clavering's last speech.

"What’s the plan?" Harry asked, very seriously. A vague idea of what the plan could be had crossed Harry's mind during Lady Clavering's last speech.

"Would it not be a good thing if Julia and Archie were to be married?" She asked the question in a quick, hesitating voice, looking at first eagerly up into his face, and then turning away her eyes, as though she were afraid of the answer she might read there. "Of course I know that you were fond of her, but all that can be nothing now."

"Do you think it would be a good idea for Julia and Archie to get married?" She asked quickly, her voice unsure, first looking eagerly up at his face, then shifting her gaze away as if she was scared of the answer she might see there. "I know you cared about her, but that doesn't matter anymore."

"No," said Harry, "that can be nothing now."

"No," Harry said, "that can't be anything now."

"Then why shouldn't Archie have her? It would make us all so much more comfortable together. I told Archie that I should speak to you, because I know that you have more weight with her than any of us; but Hugh doesn't know that I mean it."

"Then why shouldn't Archie have her? It would make everything so much easier for all of us. I told Archie that I should talk to you since I know you have more influence with her than any of us; but Hugh doesn’t realize that I actually mean it."

"Does Sir Hugh know of the,—the plan?"

"Does Sir Hugh know about the plan?"

"It was he who proposed it. Archie will be very badly off when he has settled with Hugh about all their money dealings. Of course Julia's money would be left in her own hands; there would be no intention to interfere with that. But the position would be so good for him; and it would, you know, put him on his legs."

"It was him who suggested it. Archie will be in a tough spot once he figures things out with Hugh regarding all their financial matters. Of course, Julia's money would be kept under her control; there would be no plan to touch that. But the situation would be really beneficial for him; and it would, you know, help him get back on his feet."

"Yes," said Harry, "it would put him on his legs, I daresay."

"Yeah," said Harry, "it would get him back on his feet, I bet."

"And why shouldn't it be so? She can't live alone by herself always. Of course she never could have really loved Lord Ongar."

"And why shouldn't it be? She can't always live by herself. Of course, she never could have truly loved Lord Ongar."

"Never, I should think," said Harry.

"Never, I would think," said Harry.

"And Archie is good-natured, and good-tempered, and—and—and—good-looking. Don't you think so? I think it would just do for her. She'd have her own way, for he's not a bit like Hugh, you know. He's not so clever as Hugh, but he is much more good-natured. Don't you think it would be a good arrangement, Harry?" Then again she looked up into his face anxiously.

"And Archie is friendly, easygoing, and—well—good-looking. Don't you think? I think he would be perfect for her. She'd have her way since he's nothing like Hugh, you know. He's not as smart as Hugh, but he's way more easygoing. Don’t you think it would be a good match, Harry?" Then she looked up at his face, worry written all over it.

Nothing in the whole matter surprised him more than her eagerness in advocating the proposal. Why should she desire that her sister should be sacrificed in this way? But in so thinking of it he forgot her own position, and the need that there was to her for some friend to be near to her,—for some comfort and assistance. She had spoken truly in saying that the plan had originated with her husband; but since it had been suggested to her, she had not ceased to think of it, and to wish for it.

Nothing about the whole situation surprised him more than her enthusiasm for the proposal. Why would she want her sister to be put in this position? But while he thought about it, he overlooked her own circumstances and the fact that she needed a friend close by for comfort and support. She had honestly said that the idea came from her husband; however, since it had been brought up, she hadn’t stopped thinking about it or wishing for it.

"Well, Harry, what do you say?" she asked.

"Well, Harry, what do you think?" she asked.

"I don't see that I have anything to say."

"I don't think I have anything to say."

"But I know you can help us. When I was with her the last time she declared that you were the only one of us she ever wished to see again. She meant to include me then especially, but of course she was not thinking of Archie. I know you can help us if you will."

"But I know you can help us. The last time I was with her, she said that you were the only one she ever wanted to see again. She especially meant to include me in that, but of course, she wasn't thinking of Archie. I know you can help us if you want to."

"Am I to ask her to marry him?"

"Should I ask her to marry him?"

"Not exactly that; I don't think that would do any good. But you might persuade her to come here. I think she would come if you advised her; and then, after a bit, you might say a good word for Archie."

"Not quite that; I don't think that would help. But you could convince her to come here. I think she would come if you suggested it; and then, after a while, you could say something nice about Archie."

"Upon my word I could not."

"Honestly, I couldn't do that."

"Why not, Harry?"

"Why not, Harry?"

"Because I know he would not make her happy. What good would such a marriage do her?"

"Because I know he wouldn't make her happy. What good would such a marriage be for her?"

"Think of her position. No one will visit her unless she is first received here, or at any rate unless she comes to us in town. And then it would be up-hill work. Do you know Lord Ongar had absolutely determined at one time to—to get a divorce?"

"Consider her situation. No one will go see her unless she is welcomed here first, or at least unless she comes to us in the city. And even then, it would be a tough battle. Did you know Lord Ongar had actually decided at one point to—get a divorce?"

"And do you believe that she was guilty?"

"And do you think she was guilty?"

"I don't say that. No; why should I believe anything against my own sister when nothing is proved. But that makes no difference, if the world believes it. They say now that if he had lived three months longer she never would have got the money."

"I don’t say that. No; why should I believe anything bad about my own sister when there’s no proof? But it doesn’t matter if the world believes it. They’re saying now that if he had lived three months longer, she never would have gotten the money."

"Then they say lies. Who is it says so? A parcel of old women who delight in having some one to run down and backbite. It is all false, Lady Clavering."

"Then they spread lies. Who says that? A bunch of old women who enjoy tearing someone down and gossiping. It's all untrue, Lady Clavering."

"But what does it signify, Harry? There she is, and you know how people are talking. Of course it would be best for her to marry again; and if she would take Archie,—Sir Hugh's brother, my brother-in-law, nothing further would be said. She might go anywhere then. As her sister, I feel sure that it is the best thing she could do."

"But what does it mean, Harry? There she is, and you know how people are talking. Of course, it would be best for her to get married again; and if she were to marry Archie—Sir Hugh's brother, my brother-in-law—nothing more would be said. She could go anywhere then. As her sister, I'm convinced that it's the best thing she could do."

Harry's brow became clouded, and there was a look of anger on his face as he answered her.

Harry's brow furrowed, and he looked angry as he responded to her.

"Lady Clavering," he said, "your sister will never marry my cousin Archie. I look upon the thing as impossible."

"Lady Clavering," he said, "your sister will never marry my cousin Archie. I see that as completely impossible."

"Perhaps it is, Harry, that you,—you yourself would not wish it."

"Maybe you wouldn't want that, Harry, you—yourself."

"Why should I wish it?"

"Why would I want that?"

"He is your own cousin."

"He's your cousin."

"Cousin indeed! Why should I wish it, or why should I not wish it? They are neither of them anything to me."

"Cousin, really! Why would I want that, or why wouldn't I want that? They mean nothing to me."

"She ought not to be anything to you."

"She shouldn't mean anything to you."

"And she is nothing. She may marry Archie, if she pleases, for me. I shall not set her against him. But, Lady Clavering, you might as well tell him to get one of the stars. I don't think you can know your sister when you suppose such a match to be possible."

"And she is nothing. She can marry Archie if she wants, as far as I'm concerned. I won’t turn her against him. But, Lady Clavering, you might as well ask him to get a star. I don’t think you really understand your sister if you think that kind of match is possible."

"Hermione!" shouted Sir Hugh,—and the shout was uttered in a voice that always caused Lady Clavering to tremble.

"Hermione!" shouted Sir Hugh—and his shout was in a voice that always made Lady Clavering tremble.

"I am coming," she said, rising from her chair. "Don't set yourself against it, Harry," and then, without waiting to hear him further, she obeyed her husband's summons. "What the mischief keeps you in there?" he said. It seemed that things had not been going well in the larger room. The rector had stuck to his review, taking no notice of Sir Hugh when he entered. "You seem to be very fond of your book, all of a sudden," Sir Hugh had said, after standing silent on the rug for a few minutes.

"I'm coming," she said, getting up from her chair. "Don't resist it, Harry," and then, without waiting to hear more from him, she answered her husband's call. "What on earth is keeping you in there?" he asked. It seemed like things hadn't been going well in the bigger room. The rector had focused on his review, ignoring Sir Hugh when he walked in. "You seem to really enjoy your book all of a sudden," Sir Hugh remarked after standing quietly on the rug for a few minutes.

"Yes, I am," said the rector,—"just at present."

"Yes, I am," said the rector, "right now."

"It's quite new with you, then," said Sir Hugh, "or else you're very much belied."

"It’s pretty new for you, then," said Sir Hugh, "or you’re being misrepresented."

"Hugh," said Mr. Clavering, rising slowly from his chair, "I don't often come into my father's house, but when I do, I wish to be treated with respect. You are the only person in this parish that ever omits to do so."

"Hugh," Mr. Clavering said, slowly getting up from his chair, "I don't come to my father's house very often, but when I do, I expect to be treated with respect. You're the only person in this parish who fails to do that."

"Bosh!" said Sir Hugh.

"Bosh!" said Sir Hugh.

The two girls sat cowering in their seats, and poor Florence must have begun to entertain an uncomfortable idea of her future connexions. Archie made a frantic attempt to raise some conversation with Mrs. Clavering about the weather. Mrs. Clavering, paying no attention to Archie whatever, looked at her husband with beseeching eyes. "Henry," she said, "do not allow yourself to be angry; pray do not. What is the use?"

The two girls sat shrinking in their seats, and poor Florence must have started to think about the uncomfortable possibilities of her future relationships. Archie desperately tried to start a conversation with Mrs. Clavering about the weather. Mrs. Clavering, completely ignoring Archie, looked at her husband with pleading eyes. "Henry," she said, "please don’t let yourself get angry; really, don’t. What’s the point?"

"None on earth," he said, returning to his book. "No use on earth;—and worse than none in showing it."

"None on earth," he said, going back to his book. "No purpose here;—and even worse in trying to show it."

Then it was that Sir Hugh had made a diversion by calling to his wife. "I wish you'd stay with us, and not go off alone with one person in particular, in that way." Lady Clavering looked round and immediately saw that things were unpleasant. "Archie," she said, "will you ring for tea?" And Archie did ring. The tea was brought, and a cup was taken all round, almost in silence.

Then Sir Hugh made a distraction by calling to his wife. "I wish you'd stay with us and not go off alone with that one person like that." Lady Clavering looked around and immediately noticed that things were awkward. "Archie," she said, "could you ring for tea?" And Archie rang. The tea was brought, and everyone took a cup almost in silence.

Harry in the meantime remained by himself thinking of what he had heard from Lady Clavering. Archie Clavering marry Lady Ongar,—marry his Julia! It was impossible. He could not bring himself even to think of such an arrangement with equanimity. He was almost frantic with anger as he thought of this proposition to restore Lady Ongar to the position in the world's repute which she had a right to claim, by such a marriage as that. "She would indeed be disgraced then," said Harry to himself. But he knew that it was impossible. He could see what would be the nature of Julia's countenance if Archie should ever get near enough to her to make his proposal! Archie indeed! There was no one for whom, at that moment, he entertained so thorough a contempt as he did for his cousin, Archie Clavering.

Harry, in the meantime, was alone, thinking about what he had heard from Lady Clavering. Archie Clavering marrying Lady Ongar—marrying his Julia! It was unthinkable. He couldn't even consider such an arrangement calmly. He was almost frantic with anger at the thought of this idea to restore Lady Ongar to her rightful place in society through such a marriage. "She would truly be disgraced then," Harry told himself. But he knew it was impossible. He could imagine what Julia's reaction would be if Archie ever got close enough to propose! Archie, indeed! At that moment, he felt nothing but total contempt for his cousin, Archie Clavering.

Let us hope that he was no dog in the manger;—that the feelings which he now entertained for poor Archie would not have been roused against any other possible suitor who might have been named as a fitting husband for Lady Ongar. Lady Ongar could be nothing to him!

Let’s hope he wasn’t just being selfish; that the feelings he had for poor Archie wouldn’t have turned against any other potential suitor who might have been suggested as a suitable husband for Lady Ongar. Lady Ongar meant nothing to him!

But I fear that he was a dog in the manger, and that any marriage contemplated for Lady Ongar, either by herself or by others for her, would have been distasteful to him,—unnaturally distasteful. He knew that Lady Ongar could be nothing to him; and yet, as he came out of the small room into the larger room, there was something sore about his heart, and the soreness was occasioned by the thought that any second marriage should be thought possible for Lady Ongar. Florence smiled on him as he went up to her, but I doubt whether she would have smiled had she known all his heart.

But I'm afraid he was just being selfish, and that any marriage considered for Lady Ongar, whether by her or by others, would have bothered him—unnaturally bothered. He understood that Lady Ongar could never be anything to him; and yet, as he stepped from the small room into the larger one, he felt a pain in his heart, caused by the idea that Lady Ongar might even consider a second marriage. Florence smiled at him as he approached her, but I doubt she would have smiled if she knew the truth about what was in his heart.

Soon after that Mrs. Clavering rose to return home, having swallowed a peace-offering in the shape of a cup of tea. But though the tea had quieted the storm then on the waters, there was no true peace in the rector's breast. He shook hands cordially with Lady Clavering, without animosity with Archie, and then held out three fingers to the baronet. The baronet held out one finger. Each nodded at the other, and so they parted. Harry, who knew nothing of what had happened, and who was still thinking of Lady Ongar, busied himself with Florence, and they were soon out of the house, walking down the broad road from the front door.

Soon after that, Mrs. Clavering got up to head home, having accepted a peace-offering in the form of a cup of tea. However, while the tea had calmed the storm that was brewing, there was no real peace in the rector's heart. He shook hands warmly with Lady Clavering, without any hostility towards Archie, and then extended three fingers to the baronet. The baronet responded with just one finger. They both nodded at each other and went their separate ways. Harry, who was unaware of what had just occurred and still had Lady Ongar on his mind, kept himself occupied with Florence, and soon they were out of the house, walking down the wide path from the front door.

"I will never enter that house again, when I know that Hugh Clavering is in it," said the rector.

"I'll never set foot in that house again as long as Hugh Clavering is inside," said the rector.

"Don't make rash assertions, Henry," said his wife.

"Don't jump to conclusions, Henry," said his wife.

"I hope it is not rash, but I make that assertion," he said. "I will never again enter that house as my nephew's guest. I have borne a great deal for the sake of peace, but there are things which a man cannot bear."

"I hope I'm not being hasty, but I'm standing by that statement," he said. "I will never step foot in that house again as my nephew's guest. I've put up with a lot for the sake of harmony, but there are limits to what a man can endure."

Then, as they walked home, the two girls explained to Harry what had occurred in the larger room, while he was talking to Lady Clavering in the smaller one. But he said nothing to them of the subject of that conversation.

Then, as they walked home, the two girls explained to Harry what had happened in the bigger room while he was talking to Lady Clavering in the smaller one. But he didn’t mention anything about that conversation.

 

 

CHAPTER XII.

LADY ONGAR TAKES POSSESSION.

I do not know that there is in England a more complete gentleman's residence than Ongar Park, nor could there be one in better repair, or more fit for immediate habitation than was that house when it came into the hands of the young widow. The park was not large, containing about sixty or seventy acres. But there was a home-farm attached to the place, which also now belonged to Lady Ongar for her life, and which gave to the park itself an appearance of extent which it would otherwise have wanted. The house, regarded as a nobleman's mansion, was moderate in size, but it was ample for the requirements of any ordinarily wealthy family. The dining-room, library, drawing-rooms, and breakfast-room, were all large and well-arranged. The hall was handsome and spacious, and the bed-rooms were sufficiently numerous to make an auctioneer's mouth water. But the great charm of Ongar Park lay in the grounds immediately round the house, which sloped down from the terrace before the windows to a fast-running stream which was almost hidden,—but was not hidden,—by the shrubs on its bank. Though the domain itself was small, the shrubberies and walks were extensive. It was a place costly to maintain in its present perfect condition, but when that was said against it, all was said against it which its bitterest enemies could allege.

I don't think there’s a more complete gentleman's residence in England than Ongar Park, nor one in better condition or more ready for immediate move-in than that house when it came into the hands of the young widow. The park wasn’t large, covering about sixty to seventy acres. However, there was a home farm attached to the property, which also belonged to Lady Ongar for her lifetime, and this gave the park an appearance of greater size that it would otherwise lack. The house, considered a nobleman's mansion, was moderate in size but spacious enough for the needs of any reasonably wealthy family. The dining room, library, drawing rooms, and breakfast room were all large and well laid out. The hall was attractive and roomy, and there were enough bedrooms to impress any auctioneer. But the true appeal of Ongar Park was in the grounds right around the house, which sloped down from the terrace in front of the windows to a fast-running stream that was almost but not quite hidden by the shrubs along its bank. Even though the estate itself was small, the shrubbery and paths were extensive. It was expensive to maintain in its current perfect state, but aside from that, there wasn’t much that could be said against it, even by its harshest critics.

But Lady Ongar, with her large jointure, and with no external expenses whatever, could afford this delight without imprudence. Everything in and about the place was her own, and she might live there happily, even in the face of the world's frowns, if she could teach herself to find happiness in rural luxuries. On her immediate return to England, her lawyer had told her that he found there would be opposition to her claim, and that an attempt would be made to keep the house out of her hands. Lord Ongar's people would, he said, bribe her to submit to this by immediate acquiescence as to her income. But she had declared that she would not submit,—that she would have house and income and all; and she had been successful. "Why should I surrender what is my own?" she had said, looking the lawyer full in the face. The lawyer had not dared to tell her that her opponents,—Lord Ongar's heirs,—had calculated on her anxiety to avoid exposure; but she knew that that was meant. "I have nothing to fear from them," she said, "and mean to claim what is my own by my settlement." There had, in truth, been no ground for disputing her right, and the place was given up to her before she had been three months in England. She at once went down and took possession, and there she was, alone, when her sister was communicating to Harry Clavering her plan about Captain Archie.

But Lady Ongar, with her substantial inheritance and no outside expenses, could enjoy this pleasure without being reckless. Everything in and around the property was hers, and she could live there happily, even in the face of the world's disapproval, if she could learn to find joy in the simple pleasures of country life. Upon her return to England, her lawyer informed her that there would be challenges to her claim, and that attempts would be made to keep the house from her. Lord Ongar’s family would, he said, try to bribe her into agreeing to a passive approach concerning her income. But she insisted she wouldn’t back down — that she wanted the house, the income, and everything. She had succeeded. “Why should I give up what is mine?” she had said, looking directly at her lawyer. The lawyer hadn’t had the courage to inform her that her opponents — Lord Ongar’s heirs — were counting on her fear of public scrutiny; but she understood that was their strategy. “I have nothing to fear from them,” she said, “and I intend to claim what is mine by my settlement.” In fact, there was no legitimate reason to dispute her rights, and the property was handed over to her within three months of her arrival in England. She immediately went down and took possession, and that is where she was, alone, when her sister was discussing her plan regarding Captain Archie with Harry Clavering.

She had never seen the place till she reached it on this occasion; nor had she ever seen, nor would she now probably ever see, Lord Ongar's larger house, Courton Castle. She had gone abroad with him immediately on their marriage, and now she had returned a widow to take possession of his house. There she was in possession of it all. The furniture in the rooms, the books in the cases, the gilded clocks and grand mirrors about the house, all the implements of wealthy care about the gardens, the corn in the granaries and the ricks in the hay-yard, the horses in the stable, and the cows lowing in the fields,—they were all hers. She had performed her part of the bargain, and now the price was paid to her into her hands. When she arrived she did not know what was the extent of her riches in this world's goods; nor, in truth, had she at once the courage to ask questions on the subject. She saw cows, and was told of horses; and words came to her gradually of sheep and oxen, of poultry, pigs, and growing calves. It was as though a new world had opened itself before her eyes, full of interest, and as though all that world were her own. She looked at it, and knew that it was the price of her bargain. Upon the whole she had been very lucky. She had, indeed, passed through a sharp agony,—an agony sharp almost to death; but the agony had been short, and the price was in her hand.

She had never seen the place until she arrived this time; nor had she ever seen, nor would she likely ever see, Lord Ongar's larger house, Courton Castle. She had gone abroad with him right after their marriage, and now she had returned as a widow to take ownership of his house. Here she was, fully in possession of everything. The furniture in the rooms, the books on the shelves, the fancy clocks and grand mirrors scattered throughout the house, all the signs of wealth in the gardens, the grain in the granaries and the haystacks, the horses in the stable, and the cows mooing in the fields—all of it belonged to her. She had fulfilled her part of the deal, and now the reward had been given to her. When she arrived, she didn’t know the full extent of her wealth; in fact, she didn’t have the courage to ask about it right away. She saw cows and was told about horses; gradually, she learned about sheep and oxen, poultry, pigs, and calves. It was as if a new world had opened up before her, full of intrigue, and that entire world was hers. She looked at it and understood it was the reward for her deal. Overall, she had been very fortunate. She had indeed gone through a painful experience—one nearly crushing; but the pain had been brief, and the reward was in her hand.

A close carriage had met her at the station, and taken her with her maid to the house. She had so arranged that she had reached the station after dark, and even then had felt that the eyes of many were upon her as she went out to her carriage, with her face covered by a veil. She was all alone, and there would be no one at the house to whom she could speak;—but the knowledge that the carriage was her own perhaps consoled her. The housekeeper who received her was a stout, elderly, comfortable body, to whom she could perhaps say a few words beyond those which might be spoken to an ordinary servant; but she fancied at once that the housekeeper was cold to her, and solemn in her demeanour. "I hope you have good fires, Mrs. Button." "Yes, my lady." "I think I will have some tea; I don't want anything else to-night." "Very well, my lady." Mrs. Button, maintaining a solemn countenance, would not go beyond this; and yet Mrs. Button looked like a woman who could have enjoyed a gossip, had the lady been a lady to her mind. Perhaps Mrs. Button did not like serving a lady as to whom such sad stories were told. Lady Ongar, as she thought of this, drew herself up unconsciously, and sent Mrs. Button away from her.

A private carriage had picked her up at the station and taken her, along with her maid, to the house. She had planned it so that she arrived after dark, and even then she felt like many eyes were on her as she walked to her carriage, her face hidden by a veil. She was completely alone, and there was no one at the house she could talk to; however, knowing the carriage was hers perhaps gave her some comfort. The housekeeper who greeted her was a stout, older woman who seemed warm and inviting, someone she could maybe chat with beyond the usual pleasantries given to a regular servant; but she immediately sensed that the housekeeper was distant and serious. "I hope you have good fires, Mrs. Button." "Yes, my lady." "I think I’ll have some tea; I don’t want anything else tonight." "Very well, my lady." Mrs. Button, keeping a serious expression, wouldn’t go any further; yet she looked like someone who could have enjoyed a good gossip if the lady had interested her. Perhaps Mrs. Button disapproved of serving a lady associated with such sad stories. As Lady Ongar considered this, she straightened herself unconsciously and sent Mrs. Button away.

The next morning, after an early breakfast, Lady Ongar went out. She was determined that she would work hard; that she would understand the farm; that she would know the labourers; that she would assist the poor; that she would have a school; and, above all, that she would make all the privileges of ownership her own. Was not the price in her hand, and would she not use it? She felt that it was very good that something of the price had come to her thus in the shape of land, and beeves, and wide, heavy outside garniture. From them she would pluck an interest which mere money could not have given her. She was out early, therefore, that she might look round upon the things that were her own.

The next morning, after an early breakfast, Lady Ongar went out. She was determined to work hard; to understand the farm; to know the laborers; to help the poor; to establish a school; and, above all, to take full advantage of all the privileges of ownership. Didn't she have the price in her hand, and wasn't she going to use it? She felt it was really great that part of the price had come to her in the form of land, livestock, and vast, impressive surroundings. From these, she would gain an interest that mere money could never provide. So, she was out early to explore the things that belonged to her.

And there came upon her a feeling that she would not empty this sweet cup at one draught, that she would dally somewhat with the rich banquet that was spread for her. She had many griefs to overcome, much sorrow to conquer, perhaps a long period of desolation to assuage, and she would not be prodigal of her resources. As she looked around her while she walked, almost furtively, lest some gardener as he spied her might guess her thoughts and tell how my lady was revelling in her pride of possession,—it appeared to her that those novelties in which she was to find her new interest were without end. There was not a tree there, not a shrub, not a turn in the walks, which should not become her friend. She did not go far from the house, not even down to the water. She was husbanding her resources. But yet she lost herself amidst the paths, and tried to find a joy in feeling that she had done so. It was all her own. It was the price of what she had done; and the price was even now being paid into her hand,—paid with current coin and of full weight.

And she felt that she wouldn’t gulp down this sweet cup all at once; instead, she would savor the rich feast laid out for her. She had many sorrows to face, a lot of grief to overcome, maybe even a long stretch of emptiness to deal with, and she didn't want to waste her resources. As she walked around, almost secretly, so no gardener might guess her thoughts and see how pleased she was with what she had, it seemed to her that the new things that would spark her interest were endless. There wasn’t a single tree, shrub, or turn in the pathways that wouldn’t become a friend to her. She didn’t stray far from the house, not even to the water. She was being careful with her resources. Still, she got lost in the paths and tried to find joy in that experience. It was all hers. It was the reward for what she had done, and that reward was being delivered to her right now—given in full measure.

As she sat down alone to her breakfast, she declared to herself that this should be enough for her,—that it should satisfy her. She had made her bargain with her eyes open, and would not now ask for things which had not been stipulated in the contract. She was alone, and all the world was turning its back on her. The relatives of her late husband would, as a matter of course, be her enemies. Them she had never seen, and that they should speak evil of her seemed to be only natural. But her own relatives were removed from her by a gulf nearly equally wide. Of Brabazon cousins she had none nearer than the third or fourth degree of cousinship, and of them she had never taken heed, and expected no heed from them. Her set of friends would naturally have been the same as her sister's, and would have been made up of those she had known when she was one of Sir Hugh's family. But from Sir Hugh she was divided now as widely as from the Ongar people, and,—for any purposes of society,—from her sister also. Sir Hugh had allowed his wife to invite her to Clavering, but to this she would not submit after Sir Hugh's treatment to her on her return. Though she had suffered much, her spirit was unbroken. Sir Hugh was, in truth, responsible for her reception in England. Had he come forward like a brother, all might have been well. But it was too late now for Sir Hugh Clavering to remedy the evil he had done, and he should be made to understand that Lady Ongar would not become a suppliant to him for mercy. She was striving to think how "rich she was in horses, how rich in broidered garments and in gold," as she sat solitary over her breakfast; but her mind would run off to other things, cumbering itself with unnecessary miseries and useless indignation. Had she not her price in her hand?

As she sat down alone for breakfast, she told herself that this should be enough for her—that it should satisfy her. She had made her deal with her eyes wide open and wouldn’t now ask for things that hadn’t been included in the agreement. She was alone, and the whole world seemed to be turning its back on her. The relatives of her late husband would naturally be her enemies. She had never met them, and it seemed only normal that they would speak ill of her. But her own relatives were just as distant. She had no Brabazon cousins closer than the third or fourth degree, and she had never paid attention to them, nor did she expect any attention from them. Her friends would have been the same as her sister’s and would have included those she knew when she was part of Sir Hugh's family. But now, she was as separated from Sir Hugh as she was from the Ongar people, and—for social purposes—also from her sister. Sir Hugh had allowed his wife to invite her to Clavering, but she wouldn’t accept after how Sir Hugh had treated her upon her return. Despite her suffering, her spirit remained unbroken. Sir Hugh was, in truth, responsible for how she was received in England. If he had stepped up like a brother, everything might have turned out fine. But it was too late now for Sir Hugh Clavering to fix the damage he had caused, and he should understand that Lady Ongar wouldn’t beg him for mercy. She was trying to remind herself how "rich she was in horses, how rich in embroidered garments and gold," as she sat alone over her breakfast; but her mind kept drifting to other things, burdening itself with unnecessary sorrows and pointless anger. Didn't she have her price in her hand?

Would she see the steward that morning? No,—not that morning. Things outside could go on for a while in their course as heretofore. She feared to seem to take possession with pride, and then there was that conviction that it would be well to husband her resources. So she sent for Mrs. Button, and asked Mrs. Button to walk through the rooms with her. Mrs. Button came, but again declined to accept her lady's condescension. Every spot about the house, every room, closet, and wardrobe, she was ready to open with zeal; the furniture she was prepared to describe, if Lady Ongar would listen to her; but every word was spoken in a solemn voice, very far removed from gossiping. Only once was Mrs. Button moved to betray any emotion. "That, my lady, was my lord's mother's room, after my lord died,—my lord's father that was; may God bless her." Then Lady Ongar reflected that from her husband she had never heard a word either of his father or his mother. She wished that she could seat herself with that woman in some small upstairs room, and then ask question after question about the family. But she did not dare to make the attempt. She could not bring herself to explain to Mrs. Button that she had never known anything of the belongings of her own husband.

Would she see the steward that morning? No—not that morning. Things outside could continue as they had been. She didn't want to seem proud about her new position, and she also felt it would be wise to conserve her energy. So, she called for Mrs. Button and asked her to walk through the rooms with her. Mrs. Button came but again refused to acknowledge her lady's kindness. She was eager to show every part of the house—every room, closet, and wardrobe; she was ready to describe the furniture if Lady Ongar would listen. But every word was spoken in a serious tone, far from casual chatter. Only once did Mrs. Button show any emotion. "That, my lady, was my lord's mother's room, after my lord passed away—my lord's father that was; may God bless her." Lady Ongar then realized that she had never heard her husband mention either his father or his mother. She wished she could sit down with that woman in some small upstairs room and ask her questions about the family. But she didn’t dare to try. She couldn’t bring herself to explain to Mrs. Button that she had never known anything about her own husband’s family.

When she had seen the upper part of the house, Mrs. Button offered to convoy her through the kitchens and servants' apartments, but she declined this for the present. She had done enough for the day. So she dismissed Mrs. Button, and took herself to the library. How often had she heard that books afforded the surest consolation to the desolate. She would take to reading; not on this special day, but as the resource for many days and months, and years to come. But this idea had faded and become faint, before she had left the gloomy, damp-feeling, chill room, in which some former Lord Ongar had stored the musty volumes which he had thought fit to purchase. The library gave her no ease, so she went out again among the lawns and shrubs. For some time to come her best resources must be those which she could find outside the house.

When she had seen the top part of the house, Mrs. Button offered to show her the kitchens and staff quarters, but she turned that down for now. She felt she'd done enough for the day. So, she sent Mrs. Button away and went to the library. She had often heard that books provide the best comfort for those who are feeling lost. She planned to start reading, not just today, but as a way to cope for many days, months, and years to come. But this thought faded quickly as she left the dark, damp, chilly room where some previous Lord Ongar had stored the musty books he had chosen to buy. The library offered her no relief, so she stepped back outside, among the lawns and bushes. For the time being, her best solace would have to come from what she could find beyond the house.

Peering about, she made her way behind the stables, which were attached to the house, to a farmyard gate, through which the way led to the head-quarters of the live-stock. She did not go through, but she looked over the gate, telling herself that those barns and sheds, that wealth of straw-yard, those sleeping pigs and idle dreaming calves, were all her own. As she did so, her eye fell upon an old labourer, who was sitting close to her, on a felled tree, under the shelter of a paling, eating his dinner. A little girl, some six years old, who had brought him his meal tied up in a handkerchief, was crouching near his feet. They had both seen her before she had seen them, and when she noticed them, were staring at her with all their eyes. She and they were on the same side of the farmyard paling, and so she could reach them and speak to them without difficulty. There was apparently no other person near enough to listen, and it occurred to her that she might at any rate make a friend of this old man. His name, he said, was Enoch Gubby, and the girl was his grandchild. Her name was Patty Gubby. Then Patty got up and had her head patted by her ladyship and received sixpence. They neither of them, however, knew who her ladyship was, and, as far as Lady Ongar could ascertain without a question too direct to be asked, had never heard of her. Enoch Gubby said he worked for Mr. Giles, the steward,—that was for my lord, and as he was old and stiff with rheumatism he only got eight shillings a week. He had a daughter, the mother of Patty, who worked in the fields, and got six shillings a week. Everything about the poor Gubbys seemed to be very wretched and miserable. Sometimes he could hardly drag himself about, he was so bad with the rheumatics. Then she thought that she would make one person happy, and told him that his wages should be raised to ten shillings a week. No matter whether he earned it or not, or what Mr. Giles might say, he should have ten shillings a week. Enoch Gubby bowed, and rubbed his head, and stared, and was in truth thankful because of the sixpence in ready money; but he believed nothing about the ten shillings. He did not especially disbelieve, but simply felt confident that he understood nothing that was said to him. That kindness was intended, and that the sixpence was there, he did understand.

Peeking around, she made her way behind the stables, which were connected to the house, toward a farmyard gate that led to the livestock area. She didn't go through but looked over the gate, telling herself that the barns and sheds, the abundance of straw, the sleeping pigs, and the dreaming calves were all hers. While doing this, she noticed an old laborer sitting on a fallen tree, under the shelter of a fence, eating his lunch. A little girl, about six years old, who had brought him his meal wrapped in a handkerchief, was crouching by his feet. They had both seen her before she noticed them, and when she finally did, they were staring at her wide-eyed. She and they were on the same side of the farmyard fence, so she could easily reach them and talk to them. There didn’t seem to be anyone else nearby to overhear, and it occurred to her that she might at least make a friend in this old man. His name was Enoch Gubby, and the girl was his granddaughter, Patty Gubby. Patty then stood up, received a pat on the head from her ladyship, and was given sixpence. However, neither of them knew who she was, and as far as Lady Ongar could tell without asking anything too direct, they had never heard of her. Enoch Gubby said he worked for Mr. Giles, the steward—that is, for my lord—and since he was old and crippled with rheumatism, he only earned eight shillings a week. He had a daughter, Patty's mother, who worked in the fields and earned six shillings a week. Everything about the poor Gubbys seemed very miserable. Sometimes he could hardly move due to his bad rheumatism. Then she decided to make one person happy and told him that his pay would be raised to ten shillings a week. It didn’t matter whether he earned it or what Mr. Giles might say; he would have ten shillings a week. Enoch Gubby bowed, rubbed his head, and stared, truly thankful for the sixpence in cash, but he didn’t believe anything about the ten shillings. He didn’t outright disbelieve it, he just felt he didn’t understand anything that was said to him. He did understand that kindness was being offered and that the sixpence was real.

Was not the price in her hand?
Wasn't the price in her hand?
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

But Enoch Gubby got his weekly ten shillings, though Lady Ongar hardly realized the pleasure that she had expected from the transaction. She sent that afternoon for Mr. Giles, the steward, and told him what she had done. Mr. Giles did not at all approve, and spoke his disapproval very plainly, though he garnished his rebuke with a great many "my lady's." The old man was a hanger-on about the place, and for years had received eight shillings a week, which he had not half earned. "Now he will have ten, that is all," said Lady Ongar. Mr. Giles acknowledged that if her ladyship pleased, Enoch Gubby must have the ten shillings, but declared that the business could not be carried on in that way. Everybody about the place would expect an addition, and those people who did earn what they received, would think themselves cruelly used in being worse treated than Enoch Gubby, who, according to Mr. Giles, was by no means the most worthy old man in the parish. And as for his daughter—oh! Mr. Giles could not trust himself to talk about the daughter to her ladyship. Before he left her, Lady Ongar was convinced that she had made a mistake. Not even from charity will pleasure come, if charity be taken up simply to appease remorse.

But Enoch Gubby got his weekly ten shillings, even though Lady Ongar hardly felt the joy she had expected from the deal. That afternoon, she called for Mr. Giles, the steward, and told him what she had done. Mr. Giles did not approve at all and expressed his disapproval quite clearly, though he layered his criticism with plenty of "my lady's." The old man was a fixture around the place and had received eight shillings a week for years, which he hadn’t fully earned. "Now he will have ten, that’s all,” said Lady Ongar. Mr. Giles acknowledged that if it pleased her ladyship, Enoch Gubby could have the ten shillings, but he insisted that business couldn’t be run like that. Everyone around would expect a raise, and those who actually earned what they got would feel unfairly treated to be paid less than Enoch Gubby, who, according to Mr. Giles, was by no means the most deserving old man in the parish. And as for his daughter—oh! Mr. Giles could not trust himself to discuss the daughter with her ladyship. Before he left, Lady Ongar was sure she had made a mistake. Not even from charity will joy come if charity is taken up just to relieve guilt.

The price was in her hand. For a fortnight the idea clung to her, that gradually she would realize the joys of possession; but there was no moment in which she could tell herself that the joy was hers. She was now mistress of the geography of the place. There was no more losing herself amidst the shrubberies, no thought of economizing her resources. Of Mr. Giles and his doings she still knew very little, but the desire of knowing much had faded. The ownership of the haystacks had become a thing tame to her, and the great cart-horses, as to every one of which she had intended to feel an interest, were matters of indifference to her. She observed that since her arrival a new name in new paint,—her own name,—was attached to the carts, and that the letters were big and glaring. She wished that this had not been done, or, at any rate, that the letters had been smaller. Then she began to think that it might be well for her to let the farm to a tenant; not that she might thus get more money, but because she felt that the farm would be a trouble. The apples had indeed quickly turned to ashes between her teeth!

The price was in her hand. For two weeks, she held onto the idea that eventually she would experience the joy of ownership; but there was never a moment when she could genuinely say that joy belonged to her. She had become familiar with the layout of the place. She no longer lost herself in the bushes, nor did she think about conserving her resources. She still knew very little about Mr. Giles and what he did, but her curiosity had faded. Owning the haystacks had become ordinary to her, and the horses, each of which she meant to take an interest in, were now just a matter of indifference. She noticed that since her arrival, a new name in fresh paint—her own name—was on the carts, and the letters were large and eye-catching. She wished this hadn’t happened, or at least that the letters were smaller. Then she started to think it might be a good idea to lease the farm to someone else; not because she wanted the extra money, but because she sensed that managing the farm would be a hassle. The apples had truly turned to ashes in her mouth!

On the first Sunday that she was at Ongar Park she went to the parish church. She had resolved strongly that she would do this, and she did it; but when the moment for starting came, her courage almost failed her. The church was but a few yards from her own gate, and she walked there without any attendant. She had, however, sent word to the sexton to say that she would be there, and the old man was ready to show her into the family pew. She wore a thick veil, and was dressed, of course, in all the deep ceremonious woe of widowhood. As she walked up the centre of the church she thought of her dress, and told herself that all there would know how it had been between her and her husband. She was pretending to mourn for the man to whom she had sold herself; for the man who through happy chance had died so quickly, leaving her with the price in her hand! All of course knew that, and all thought that they knew, moreover, that she had been foully false to her bargain, and had not earned the price! That, also, she told herself. But she went through it, and walked out of the church among the village crowd with her head on high.

On the first Sunday she was at Ongar Park, she went to the parish church. She had firmly decided to do this, and she did; but when it was time to leave, her courage almost wavered. The church was just a few yards from her gate, and she walked there alone. However, she had let the sexton know she would be attending, and the old man was ready to show her to the family pew. She wore a thick veil and was dressed, of course, in all the deep ceremonial mourning of a widow. As she walked down the center of the church, she thought about her dress and told herself that everyone there would know how things had been between her and her husband. She was pretending to mourn for the man to whom she had given herself; for the man who, by a fortunate turn of events, had died so quickly, leaving her with the price in her hand! Everyone, of course, knew that, and they all thought they knew, too, that she had been disgracefully untrue to her bargain and hadn’t earned the price! She reminded herself of that as well. But she pushed through it and walked out of the church among the village crowd with her head held high.

Three days afterwards she wrote to the clergyman, asking him to call on her. She had come, she said, to live in the parish, and hoped to be able, with his assistance, to be of some use among the people. She would hardly know how to act without some counsel from him. The schools might be all that was excellent, but if there was anything required she hoped he would tell her. On the following morning the clergyman called, and, with many thanks for her generosity, listened to her plans, and accepted her subsidies. But he was a married man, and he said nothing of his wife, nor during the next week did his wife come to call on her. She was to be left desolate by all, because men had told lies of her!

Three days later, she wrote to the clergyman, asking him to visit her. She mentioned that she had moved into the parish and hoped to contribute positively to the community with his help. She wouldn’t know how to proceed without his guidance. The schools might be great, but if there was anything needed, she hoped he would let her know. The next morning, the clergyman came by, thanked her for her generosity, listened to her plans, and accepted her support. However, he was a married man and said nothing about his wife, nor did she visit her during the following week. She was left feeling abandoned by everyone because men had spread false stories about her!

She had the price in her hands, but she felt herself tempted to do as Judas did,—to go out and hang herself.

She had the price in her hands, but she felt tempted to do what Judas did—to go out and hang herself.

 

 

CHAPTER XIII.

A VISITOR CALLS AT ONGAR PARK.

It will be remembered that Harry Clavering, on returning one evening to his lodgings in Bloomsbury Square, had been much astonished at finding there the card of Count Pateroff, a man of whom he had only heard, up to that moment, as the friend of the late Lord Ongar. At first he had been very angry with Lady Ongar, thinking that she and this count were in some league together, some league of which he would greatly disapprove; but his anger had given place to a new interest when he learned direct from herself that she had not seen the count, and that she was simply anxious that he, as her friend, should have an interview with the man. He had then become very eager in the matter, offering to subject himself to any amount of inconvenience so that he might effect that which Lady Ongar asked of him. He was not, however, called upon to endure any special trouble or expense, as he heard nothing more from Count Pateroff till he had been back in London for two or three weeks.

IIt will be remembered that Harry Clavering, one evening when he returned to his lodgings in Bloomsbury Square, was quite surprised to find the card of Count Pateroff there, a man he had only heard about as the friend of the late Lord Ongar. Initially, he felt very angry with Lady Ongar, thinking that she and this count were in some kind of conspiracy that he would strongly disapprove of; however, his anger turned into curiosity when he learned directly from her that she hadn’t seen the count and that she simply wanted him, as her friend, to meet the man. He then became very eager about it, willing to go through all sorts of hassle to do what Lady Ongar asked of him. He didn’t have to face any particular trouble or expense, though, because he didn’t hear anything more from Count Pateroff until he had been back in London for two or three weeks.

Lady Ongar's statement to him had been quite true. It had been even more than true; for when she had written she had not even heard directly from the count. She had learned by letter from another person that Count Pateroff was in London, and had then communicated the fact to her friend. This other person was a sister of the count's, who was now living in London, one Madame Gordeloup,—Sophie Gordeloup,—a lady whom Harry had found sitting in Lady Ongar's room when last he had seen her in Bolton Street. He had not then heard her name; nor was he aware then, or for some time subsequently, that Count Pateroff had any relative in London.

Lady Ongar's statement to him was completely accurate. In fact, it was even more accurate than she realized; she hadn't even heard directly from the count when she wrote. She found out through a letter from someone else that Count Pateroff was in London and then shared that information with her friend. This other person was the count's sister, who was currently living in London, Madame Gordeloup—Sophie Gordeloup—a woman Harry had encountered sitting in Lady Ongar's room the last time he visited her on Bolton Street. At that point, he hadn’t known her name, nor was he aware for some time after that Count Pateroff had any relatives in London.

Lady Ongar had been a fortnight in the country before she received Madame Gordeloup's letter. In that letter the sister had declared herself to be most anxious that her brother should see Lady Ongar. The letter had been in French, and had been very eloquent,—more eloquent in its cause than any letter with the same object could have been if written by an Englishwoman in English; and the eloquence was less offensive than it might, under all concurrent circumstances, have been had it reached Lady Ongar in English. The reader must not, however, suppose that the letter contained a word that was intended to support a lover's suit. It was very far indeed from that, and spoke of the count simply as a friend; but its eloquence went to show that nothing that had passed should be construed by Lady Ongar as offering any bar to a fair friendship. What the world said!—Bah! Did not she know,—she, Sophie,—and did not her friend know,—her friend Julie,—that the world was a great liar? Was it not even now telling wicked venomous lies about her friend Julie? Why mind what the world said, seeing that the world could not be brought to speak one word of truth? The world indeed! Bah!

Lady Ongar had been in the countryside for two weeks before she received Madame Gordeloup's letter. In that letter, her sister expressed her strong desire for her brother to meet Lady Ongar. The letter was in French and was very eloquent—more so for its purpose than any letter with the same aim could have been if written by an Englishwoman in English; and the eloquence was less off-putting than it might have been given the circumstances if it had reached Lady Ongar in English. However, the reader should not think that the letter contained anything meant to support a romantic pursuit. It was quite the opposite, referring to the count simply as a friend; but its eloquence suggested that nothing that had happened should lead Lady Ongar to interpret it as an obstacle to a genuine friendship. What did the world say?—Bah! Didn't she know—she, Sophie—and didn't her friend know—her friend Julie—that the world was a great liar? Wasn't it even now spreading wicked, venomous lies about her friend Julie? Why care what the world said, considering that it couldn’t be trusted to speak a single word of truth? The world indeed! Bah!

But Lady Ongar, though she was not as yet more than half as old as Madame Gordeloup, knew what she was about almost as well as that lady knew what Sophie Gordeloup was doing. Lady Ongar had known the count's sister in France and Italy, having seen much of her in one of those sudden intimacies to which English people are subject when abroad; and she had been glad to see Madame Gordeloup in London,—much more glad than she would have been had she been received there on her return by a crowd of loving native friends. But not on that account was she prepared to shape her conduct in accordance with her friend Sophie's advice, and especially not so when that advice had reference to Sophie's brother. She had, therefore, said very little in return to the lady's eloquence, answering the letter on that matter very vaguely; but, having a purpose of her own, had begged that Count Pateroff might be asked to call upon Harry Clavering. Count Pateroff did not feel himself to care very much about Harry Clavering, but wishing to do as he was bidden, did leave his card in Bloomsbury Square.

But Lady Ongar, even though she was only about half the age of Madame Gordeloup, was quite aware of what she was doing, almost as well as that lady knew what Sophie Gordeloup was up to. Lady Ongar had known the count's sister in France and Italy, having spent a lot of time with her during those sudden friendships that English people often form when traveling; and she was happy to see Madame Gordeloup in London—much happier than she would have been if she had been welcomed back by a crowd of loving local friends. However, that didn’t mean she was willing to change her behavior based on her friend Sophie’s advice, especially when it involved Sophie’s brother. Therefore, she responded very little to the lady's enthusiastic letters, addressing the matter quite vaguely; but with her own agenda in mind, she requested that Count Pateroff be asked to visit Harry Clavering. Count Pateroff wasn’t particularly interested in Harry Clavering, but wanting to follow instructions, he left his card in Bloomsbury Square.

And why was Lady Ongar anxious that the young man who was her friend should see the man who had been her husband's friend, and whose name had been mixed with her own in so grievous a manner? She had called Harry her friend, and it might be that she desired to give this friend every possible means of testing the truth of that story which she herself had told. The reader, perhaps, will hardly have believed in Lady Ongar's friendship;—will, perhaps, have believed neither the friendship nor the story. If so, the reader will have done her wrong, and will not have read her character aright. The woman was not heartless because she had once, in one great epoch of her life, betrayed her own heart; nor was she altogether false because she had once lied; nor altogether vile, because she had once taught herself that, for such an one as her, riches were a necessity. It might be that the punishment of her sin could meet with no remission in this world, but not on that account should it be presumed that there was no place for repentance left to her.

And why was Lady Ongar worried that the young man who was her friend should meet the man who had been a friend to her husband, and whose name had been tied to hers in such a painful way? She had called Harry her friend, and it might be that she wanted to give him every chance to verify the truth of the story she had shared. The reader might not have believed in Lady Ongar's friendship—might not have believed either in the friendship or the story at all. If that's the case, the reader has misunderstood her and hasn't grasped her character correctly. The woman wasn't heartless just because she had once, at a pivotal moment in her life, betrayed her own feelings; nor was she completely untrustworthy because she had once lied; nor was she entirely immoral because she had once convinced herself that, for someone like her, wealth was essential. It might be that the consequences of her sin had no forgiveness in this life, but that doesn’t mean there was no room for her to repent.

As she walked alone through the shrubberies at Ongar Park she thought much of those other paths at Clavering, and of the walks in which she had not been alone; and she thought of that interview in the garden when she had explained to Harry,—as she had then thought so successfully,—that they two, each being poor, were not fit to love and marry each other. She had brooded over all that, too, during the long hours of her sad journey home to England. She was thinking of it still when she had met him, and had been so cold to him on the platform of the railway station, when she had sent him away angry because she had seemed to slight him. She had thought of it as she had sat in her London room, telling him the terrible tale of her married life, while her eyes were fixed on his and her head was resting on her hands. Even then, at that moment, she was asking herself whether he believed her story, or whether, within his breast, he was saying that she was vile and false. She knew that she had been false to him, and that he must have despised her when, with her easy philosophy, she had made the best of her own mercenary perfidy. He had called her a jilt to her face, and she had been able to receive the accusation with a smile. Would he now call her something worse, and with a louder voice, within his own bosom? And if she could convince him that to that accusation she was not fairly subject, might the old thing come back again? Would he walk with her again, and look into her eyes as though he only wanted her commands to show himself ready to be her slave? She was a widow, and had seen many things, but even now she had not reached her six-and-twentieth year.

As she walked alone through the bushes at Ongar Park, she thought a lot about those other paths at Clavering and the walks where she hadn’t been alone. She remembered that conversation in the garden when she had told Harry—thinking she had done it successfully—that they were both too poor to love and marry each other. She had reflected on that during the long, sad journey home to England. She was still thinking about it when she met him and was so cold to him at the railway station, sending him away angry because she had acted like she didn’t care. She thought of it while sitting in her London room, telling him the painful story of her married life, her eyes fixed on his, her head resting on her hands. Even then, at that moment, she was wondering if he believed her story or if, deep down, he was thinking she was vile and dishonest. She knew she had been untruthful with him and that he must have looked down on her when, with her casual attitude, she downplayed her own selfish betrayal. He had called her a jilt to her face, and she had been able to take the accusation with a smile. Would he now call her something worse and louder in his own mind? And if she could convince him that she wasn’t really guilty of that accusation, could things go back to the way they were? Would he walk with her again and look into her eyes as if he just wanted her to give him orders to be her willing servant? She was a widow and had seen a lot, but even now, she wasn’t yet twenty-six.

The apples at her rich country-seat had quickly become ashes between her teeth, but something of the juice of the fruit might yet reach her palate if he would come and sit with her at the table. As she complained to herself of the coldness of the world, she thought that she would not care how cold might be all the world if there might be but one whom she could love, and who would love her. And him she had loved. To him, in old days,—in days which now seemed to her to be very old,—she had made confession of her love. Old as were those days, it could not be but he should still remember them. She had loved him, and him only. To none other had she ever pretended love. From none other had love been offered to her. Between her and that wretched being to whom she had sold herself, who had been half dead before she had seen him, there had been no pretence of love. But Harry Clavering she had loved. Harry Clavering was a man, with all those qualities which she valued, and also with those foibles which saved him from being too perfect for so slight a creature as herself. Harry had been offended to the quick, and had called her a jilt; but yet it might be possible that he would return to her.

The apples at her luxurious country house had quickly turned to ashes in her mouth, but if he would come and sit with her at the table, she might still taste some of the fruit's sweetness. As she grumbled to herself about the coldness of the world, she thought she wouldn't mind how cold it was if there was just one person she could love, and who would love her back. And that person was him. In the past—what now felt like a long time ago—she had confessed her love to him. Even though those days were far behind, he should still remember them. She had loved him, and only him. She had never pretended to love anyone else. No one else had offered her love. Between her and that miserable person she had married, who had been half-dead before she even met him, there had been no pretense of love. But she had loved Harry Clavering. Harry Clavering was a man with all the qualities she cherished, and his little flaws that made him relatable to someone as fragile as herself. Harry had been deeply hurt and had called her a jilt, but it was still possible he might come back to her.

It should not be supposed that since her return to England she had had one settled, definite object before her eyes with regard to this renewal of her love. There had been times in which she had thought that she would go on with the life which she had prepared for herself, and that she would make herself contented, if not happy, with the price which had been paid to her. And there were other times, in which her spirits sank low within her, and she told herself that no contentment was any longer possible to her. She looked at herself in the glass, and found herself to be old and haggard. Harry, she said, was the last man in the world to sell himself for wealth, when there was no love remaining. Harry would never do as she had done with herself! Not for all the wealth that woman ever inherited,—so she told herself,—would he link himself to one who had made herself vile and tainted among women! In this, I think, she did him no more than justice, though it may be that in some other matters she rated his character too highly. Of Florence Burton she had as yet heard nothing, though had she heard of her, it may well be that she would not on that account have desisted. Such being her thoughts and her hopes, she had written to Harry, begging him to see this man who had followed her,—she knew not why,—from Italy; and had told the sister simply that she could not do as she was asked, because she was away from London, alone in a country house.

It shouldn't be assumed that since returning to England, she had a clear and fixed goal regarding her renewed love. There were times when she thought about sticking to the life she had planned for herself, convincing herself she could be content, if not happy, with the price she had paid. Then there were other moments when her spirits dropped and she told herself that contentment was no longer possible. She looked in the mirror and saw an old and haggard reflection. Harry, she thought, would be the last man to sell himself for money when love was gone. He would never do what she had done to herself! No amount of wealth a woman ever inherited, she told herself, would make him attach himself to someone who had made herself shameful and tainted among women! In this, I believe she was fair to him, even if she sometimes oversaw his character in other areas. She hadn’t heard anything about Florence Burton yet; if she had, it’s likely she wouldn’t have stopped what she was doing. With these thoughts and hopes in mind, she wrote to Harry, asking him to meet the man who had followed her from Italy for reasons she didn’t understand; and she simply told her sister that she couldn’t comply with the request because she was away from London, alone in a country house.

And quite alone she was sitting one morning, counting up her misery, feeling that the apples were, in truth, ashes, when a servant came to her, telling her that there was a gentleman in the hall desirous of seeing her. The man had the visitor's card in his hand, but before she could read the name, the blood had mounted into her face as she told herself that it was Harry Clavering. There was joy for a moment at her heart; but she must not show it,—not as yet. She had been but four months a widow, and he should not have come to her in the country. She must see him and in some way make him understand this,—but she would be very gentle with him. Then her eye fell upon the card, and she saw, with grievous disappointment, that it bore the name of Count Pateroff. No;—she was not going to be caught in that way. Let the result be what it might, she would not let Sophie Gordeloup, or Sophie's brother, get the better of her by such a ruse as that! "Tell the gentleman, with my compliments," she said, as she handed back the card, "that I regret it greatly, but I can see no one now." Then the servant went away, and she sat wondering whether the count would be able to make his way into her presence. She felt rather than knew that she had some reason to fear him. All that had been told of him and of her had been false. No accusation brought against her had contained one spark of truth. But there had been things between Lord Ongar and this man which she would not care to have told openly in England. And though, in his conduct to her, he had been customarily courteous, and on one occasion had been generous, still she feared him. She would much rather that he should have remained in Italy. And though, when all alone in Bolton Street, she had in her desolation welcomed his sister Sophie, she would have preferred that Sophie should not have come to her, claiming to renew their friendship. But with the count she would hold no communion now, even though he should find his way into the room.

And completely alone, she was sitting one morning, counting her sorrows, feeling that the apples were, in reality, ashes, when a servant approached her, saying there was a man in the hall who wanted to see her. The man had a visitor's card in his hand, but before she could read the name, her face flushed as she thought it was Harry Clavering. For a moment, her heart filled with joy, but she couldn’t show it—not yet. She had only been a widow for four months, and he shouldn’t have come to see her in the country. She had to see him and somehow make him understand this—but she would be very gentle with him. Then her eyes fell on the card, and she saw, with disappointing sorrow, that it had the name Count Pateroff. No; she wasn’t going to fall for that. No matter the outcome, she wouldn’t let Sophie Gordeloup, or Sophie’s brother, manipulate her with such a trick! “Tell the gentleman, with my compliments,” she said, handing back the card, “that I regret it greatly, but I can’t see anyone right now.” Then the servant left, and she sat wondering if the count would be able to make his way into her presence. She felt rather than knew that she had some reason to fear him. Everything said about him and her had been false. No accusation against her had contained a bit of truth. But there had been things between Lord Ongar and this man that she would rather not have revealed openly in England. And although he had usually been courteous and had even been generous once, still she feared him. She would have much preferred if he had stayed in Italy. And although, when she was all alone in Bolton Street, she had welcomed his sister Sophie in her despair, she would have preferred if Sophie hadn’t come to her claiming to renew their friendship. But with the count, she would have no communication now, even if he managed to enter the room.

A few minutes passed before the servant returned, and then he brought a note with him. As the door opened Lady Ongar rose, ready to leave the room by another passage; but she took the note and read it. It was as follows:—"I cannot understand why you should refuse to see me, and I feel aggrieved. My present purpose is to say a few words to you on private matters connected with papers that belonged to Lord Ongar. I still hope that you will admit me.—P." Having read these words while standing, she made an effort to think what might be the best course for her to follow. As for Lord Ongar's papers, she did not believe in the plea. Lord Ongar could have had no papers interesting to her in such a manner as to make her desirous of seeing this man or of hearing of them in private. Lord Ongar, though she had nursed him to the hour of his death, earning her price, had been her bitterest enemy; and though there had been something about this count that she had respected, she had known him to be a man of intrigue and afraid of no falsehoods in his intrigues,—a dangerous man, who might perhaps now and again do a generous thing, but one who would expect payment for his generosity. Besides, had he not been named openly as her lover? She wrote to him, therefore, as follows:—"Lady Ongar presents her compliments to Count Pateroff, and finds it to be out of her power to see him at present." This answer the visitor took and walked away from the front door without showing any disgust to the servant, either by his demeanour or in his countenance. On that evening she received from him a long letter, written at the neighbouring inn, expostulating with her as to her conduct towards him, and saying in the last line, that it was "impossible now that they should be strangers to each other." "Impossible that we should be strangers," she said almost out loud. "Why impossible? I know no such impossibility." After that she carefully burned both the letter and the note.

A few minutes went by before the servant came back, bringing a note with him. When the door opened, Lady Ongar stood up, ready to leave the room through another exit; but she took the note and read it. It said:—"I can't understand why you're refusing to see me, and I feel hurt. My current reason for reaching out is to discuss some private matters related to papers that belonged to Lord Ongar. I still hope you’ll let me in.—P." After reading this while standing, she tried to think about the best course of action. As for Lord Ongar's papers, she didn’t believe the excuse. Lord Ongar couldn’t have had any papers that would interest her enough to want to see this man or hear about them privately. Although she had cared for him until his last moments, earning her price, he had been her fiercest enemy; and while she had respected something about this count, she knew him to be a schemer who wasn’t afraid of lies in his plots—a dangerous man who might occasionally do something generous but would always expect something in return. Plus, hadn’t he been publicly called her lover? So, she wrote to him:—"Lady Ongar sends her regards to Count Pateroff and finds it impossible to meet with him at this time." The visitor took the message and left the front door without showing any sign of annoyance to the servant, either in his behavior or expression. That evening, she got a long letter from him, written at a nearby inn, expressing his disappointment over her treatment of him and stating in the last line that it was "impossible for them to remain strangers now." "Impossible for us to be strangers," she said almost aloud. "Why impossible? I don’t see any such impossibility." After that, she carefully burned both the letter and the note.

She remained at Ongar Park something over six weeks, and then, about the beginning of May, she went back to London. No one had been to see her, except Mr. Sturm, the clergyman of the parish; and he, though something almost approaching to an intimacy had sprung up between them, had never yet spoken to her of his wife. She was not quite sure whether her rank might not deter him,—whether under such circumstances as those now in question, the ordinary social rules were not ordinarily broken,—whether a countess should not call on a clergyman's wife first, although the countess might be the stranger; but she did not dare to do as she would have done, had no blight attached itself to her name. She gave, therefore, no hint; she said no word of Mrs. Sturm, though her heart was longing for a kind word from some woman's mouth. But she allowed herself to feel no anger against the husband, and went through her parish work, thanking him for his assistance.

She stayed at Ongar Park for a little over six weeks, and then, around the beginning of May, she returned to London. No one had come to visit her, except for Mr. Sturm, the local clergyman. Even though they had developed a sort of closeness, he had never mentioned his wife to her. She wasn't sure if her status might hold him back—if, under these circumstances, the usual social norms were not typically followed—if a countess should reach out to a clergyman's wife first, even if the countess was the newcomer. But she didn’t dare to act as she would have if there weren’t any stigma attached to her name. So, she gave no hints; she didn’t say anything about Mrs. Sturm, even though her heart longed for a kind word from another woman. However, she chose not to feel any resentment toward the husband and went about her parish duties, grateful for his support.

Of Mr. Giles she had seen very little, and since her misfortune with Enoch Gubby, she had made no further attempt to interfere with the wages of the persons employed. Into the houses of some of the poor she had made her way, but she fancied that they were not glad to see her. They might, perhaps, have all heard of her reputation, and Gubby's daughter may have congratulated herself that there was another in the parish as bad as herself, or perhaps, happily, worse. The owner of all the wealth around strove to make Mrs. Button become a messenger of charity between herself and some of the poor; but Mrs. Button altogether declined the employment, although, as her mistress had ascertained, she herself performed her own little missions of charity with zeal. Before the fortnight was over, Lady Ongar was sick of her house and her park, utterly disregardful of her horses and oxen, and unmindful even of the pleasant stream which in these spring days rippled softly at the bottom of her gardens.

She had seen very little of Mr. Giles, and since her unfortunate encounter with Enoch Gubby, she hadn’t tried to meddle with the wages of the workers again. She had visited some of the poorer households, but she had the feeling they weren’t happy to see her. They might have all heard about her reputation, and Gubby’s daughter could have felt relieved that there was someone else in the parish just as bad as she was, or maybe even worse. The owner of all the nearby wealth tried to make Mrs. Button a charity messenger between herself and some of the poor; however, Mrs. Button completely refused the role, even though, as her employer had found out, she actively carried out her own small acts of charity. By the end of the fortnight, Lady Ongar was tired of her house and park, completely indifferent to her horses and cattle, and even neglectful of the pleasant stream that gently flowed at the bottom of her gardens during these spring days.

She had undertaken to be back in London early in May, by appointment with her lawyer, and had unfortunately communicated the fact to Madame Gordeloup. Four or five days before she was due in Bolton Street, her mindful Sophie, with unerring memory, wrote to her, declaring her readiness to do all and anything that the most diligent friendship could prompt. Should she meet her dear Julie at the station in London? Should she bring any special carriage? Should she order any special dinner in Bolton Street? She herself would of course come to Bolton Street, if not allowed to be present at the station. It was still chilly in the evenings, and she would have fires lit. Might she suggest a roast fowl and some bread sauce, and perhaps a sweetbread,—and just one glass of champagne? And might she share the banquet? There was not a word in the note about the too obtrusive brother, either as to the offence committed by him, or the offence felt by him.

She had planned to be back in London early in May for a meeting with her lawyer and had unfortunately mentioned this to Madame Gordeloup. Four or five days before she was supposed to arrive in Bolton Street, her attentive Sophie, with perfect recall, wrote to her, expressing her willingness to do everything a devoted friend could offer. Should she meet her dear Julie at the train station in London? Should she bring a special carriage? Should she arrange a special dinner in Bolton Street? Of course, she would come to Bolton Street if she couldn't be there at the station. It was still chilly in the evenings, and she would have fires going. Could she suggest roast chicken and some bread sauce, maybe a sweetbread, and just one glass of champagne? And could she join the meal? There wasn’t a single mention in the note about the overly intrusive brother, either about the offense he caused or the offense he felt.

The little Franco-Polish woman was there in Bolton Street, of course,—for Lady Ongar had not dared to refuse her. A little, dry, bright woman she was, with quick eyes, and thin lips, and small nose, and mean forehead, and scanty hair drawn back quite tightly from her face and head; very dry, but still almost pretty with her quickness and her brightness. She was fifty, was Sophie Gordeloup, but she had so managed her years that she was as active on her limbs as most women are at twenty-five. And the chicken, and the bread-sauce, and the sweetbread, and the champagne were there, all very good of their kind; for Sophie Gordeloup liked such things to be good, and knew how to indulge her own appetite, and to coax that of another person.

The little Franco-Polish woman was there on Bolton Street, of course—since Lady Ongar hadn’t dared to turn her down. She was a small, dry, lively woman with quick eyes, thin lips, a small nose, a narrow forehead, and sparse hair pulled back tightly from her face and head; very dry, but still almost pretty with her liveliness and brightness. Sophie Gordeloup was fifty, but she carried her years well, being as spry on her feet as most women are at twenty-five. The chicken, bread sauce, sweetbread, and champagne were all there, very good quality; Sophie Gordeloup liked her food to be good and knew how to satisfy her own appetite while tempting that of others.

Some little satisfaction Lady Ongar received from the fact that she was not alone; but the satisfaction was not satisfactory. When Sophie had left her at ten o'clock, running off by herself to her lodgings in Mount Street, Lady Ongar, after but one moment's thought, sat down and wrote a note to Harry Clavering.
 

Some small comfort Lady Ongar got from the fact that she wasn't alone; but it wasn't really satisfying. After Sophie left her at ten o'clock, hurrying back to her place on Mount Street, Lady Ongar, after just a moment's thought, sat down and wrote a note to Harry Clavering.

Dear Harry,—I am back in town. Pray come and see me to-morrow evening. Yours ever,

Dear Harry,—I’m back in town. Please come and see me tomorrow evening. Yours always,

J. O.
 

J. O.

 

 

CHAPTER XIV.

COUNT PATEROFF AND HIS SISTER.

After an interval of some weeks, during which Harry had been down at Clavering and had returned again to his work at the Adelphi, Count Pateroff called again in Bloomsbury Square;—but Harry was at Mr. Beilby's office. Harry at once returned the count's visit at the address given in Mount Street. Madame was at home, said the servant-girl, from which Harry was led to suppose that the count was a married man; but Harry felt that he had no right to intrude upon madame, so he simply left his card. Wishing, however, really to have this interview, and having been lately elected at a club of which he was rather proud, he wrote to the count asking him to dine with him at the Beaufort. He explained that there was a strangers' room,—which Pateroff knew very well, having often dined at the Beaufort,—and said something as to a private little dinner for two, thereby apologizing for proposing to the count to dine without other guests. Pateroff accepted the invitation, and Harry, never having done such a thing before, ordered his dinner with much nervousness.

After a few weeks, during which Harry had been down in Clavering and had returned to his work at the Adelphi, Count Pateroff stopped by Bloomsbury Square again; but Harry was at Mr. Beilby's office. Harry quickly returned the count's visit at the address in Mount Street. The maid said Madame was at home, which led Harry to believe that the count was married; however, he felt he had no right to intrude on Madame, so he just left his card. Wanting to actually have this meeting, and having recently been elected to a club he was quite proud of, he wrote to the count inviting him to dinner at the Beaufort. He mentioned that there was a strangers' room—which Pateroff knew well, having often dined there—and said something about a private little dinner for two, thereby apologizing for suggesting an intimate dinner without other guests. Pateroff accepted the invitation, and Harry, having never done anything like this before, nervously ordered his dinner.

The count was punctual, and the two men introduced themselves. Harry had expected to see a handsome foreigner, with black hair, polished whiskers, and probably a hook nose,—forty years of age or thereabouts, but so got up as to look not much more than thirty. But his guest was by no means a man of that stamp. Excepting that the count's age was altogether uncertain, no correctness of guess on that matter being possible by means of his appearance, Harry's preconceived notion was wrong in every point. He was a fair man, with a broad fair face, and very light blue eyes; his forehead was low, but broad; he wore no whiskers, but bore on his lip a heavy moustache which was not grey, but perfectly white—white it was with years of course, but yet it gave no sign of age to his face. He was well made, active, and somewhat broad in the shoulders, though rather below the middle height. But for a certain ease of manner which he possessed, accompanied by something of restlessness in his eye, any one would have taken him for an Englishman. And his speech hardly betrayed that he was not English. Harry, knowing that he was a foreigner, noticed now and again some little acquired distinctness of speech which is hardly natural to a native; but otherwise there was nothing in his tongue to betray him.

The count was on time, and the two men introduced themselves. Harry had expected to meet a handsome foreigner, with black hair, well-groomed facial hair, and likely a prominent nose—around forty years old, but dressed in a way that made him look no older than thirty. However, his guest was nothing like that. Aside from the fact that the count's age was completely unclear, making it impossible to guess based on his appearance, Harry's preconceived idea was incorrect in every way. He was a light-haired man with a broad, fair face and very light blue eyes; his forehead was low but wide. He had no facial hair, but sported a heavy mustache that was white—not gray, but white from age, although it didn’t make him look old. He had a well-built, active body and was somewhat broad-shouldered, though he was slightly below average height. If it weren’t for his relaxed demeanor, combined with a hint of restlessness in his eyes, anyone would have thought he was English. His speech rarely revealed that he wasn't. Harry, knowing he was a foreigner, occasionally picked up on a bit of distinct pronunciation that wasn't quite natural for a native speaker; otherwise, there was nothing in his language that gave him away.

"I am sorry that you should have had so much trouble," he said, shaking hands with Harry. Clavering declared that he had incurred no trouble, and declared also that he would be only too happy to have taken any trouble in obeying a behest from his friend Lady Ongar. Had he been a Pole as was the count, he would not have forgotten to add that he would have been equally willing to exert himself with the view of making the count's acquaintance; but being simply a young Englishman, he was much too awkward for any such courtesy as that. The count observed the omission, smiled, and bowed. Then he spoke of the weather, and said that London was a magnificent city. Oh, yes, he knew London well,—had known it these twenty years;—had been for fifteen years a member of the Travellers';—he liked everything English, except hunting. English hunting he had found to be dull work. But he liked shooting for an hour or two. He could not rival, he said, the intense energy of an Englishman, who would work all day with his guns harder than ploughmen with their ploughs. Englishmen sported, he said, as though more than their bread,—as though their honour, their wives, their souls, depended on it. It was very fine! He often wished that he was an Englishman. Then he shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm sorry you had to deal with so much trouble," he said, shaking hands with Harry. Clavering mentioned that he hadn’t faced any trouble at all and that he would have been more than happy to put in the effort to follow a request from his friend Lady Ongar. If he had been a Pole like the count, he would have remembered to add that he would also have been eager to make the count’s acquaintance; but being just a young Englishman, he felt too awkward for such a gesture. The count noticed the omission, smiled, and bowed. Then he talked about the weather and said that London was a magnificent city. Oh, yes, he knew London well—had known it for twenty years; he had been a member of the Travellers' for fifteen years; he liked everything English except hunting. He found English hunting to be boring. But he enjoyed shooting for an hour or two. He couldn’t compete, he said, with the fierce energy of an Englishman, who would work all day with his guns harder than farmers with their plows. Englishmen hunted, he said, as if more than their livelihood—as if their honor, their wives, their souls depended on it. It was very impressive! He often wished he were an Englishman. Then he shrugged his shoulders.

Harry was very anxious to commence a conversation about Lady Ongar, but he did not know how at first to introduce her name. Count Pateroff had come to him at Lady Ongar's request, and therefore, as he thought, the count should have been the first to mention her. But the count seemed to be enjoying his dinner without any thought either of Lady Ongar or of her late husband. At this time he had been down to Ongar Park, on that mission which had been, as we know, futile; but he said no word of that to Harry. He seemed to enjoy his dinner thoroughly, and made himself very agreeable. When the wine was discussed he told Harry that a certain vintage of Moselle was very famous at the Beaufort. Harry ordered the wine of course, and was delighted to give his guest the best of everything; but he was a little annoyed at finding that the stranger knew his club better than he knew it himself. Slowly the count ate his dinner, enjoying every morsel that he took with that thoughtful, conscious pleasure which young men never attain in eating and drinking, and which men as they grow older so often forget to acquire. But the count never forgot any of his own capacities for pleasure, and in all things made the most of his own resources. To be rich is not to have one or ten thousand a year, but to be able to get out of that one or ten thousand all that every pound, and every shilling, and every penny will give you. After this fashion the count was a rich man.

Harry was really eager to start a conversation about Lady Ongar, but he wasn’t sure how to bring her up. Count Pateroff had come to see him at Lady Ongar's request, so he thought the count should mention her first. However, the count seemed to be enjoying his dinner without any thoughts about Lady Ongar or her late husband. At that time, he had been to Ongar Park on a mission that, as we know, was pointless; but he didn’t say anything about that to Harry. He appeared to be thoroughly enjoying his meal and was very charming. When it came to the wine, he told Harry that a particular vintage of Moselle was quite famous at the Beaufort. Harry ordered the wine, of course, and was pleased to treat his guest to the best of everything; but he felt a bit annoyed to realize that the stranger knew the club better than he did. The count slowly savored his dinner, relishing every bite with a thoughtful enjoyment that young men rarely achieve and that older men often forget to enjoy. But the count never overlooked any of his own capacities for pleasure, and he always made the most of his resources. Being rich isn’t just having one or ten thousand a year; it’s about getting everything you can out of every pound, shilling, and penny. By that standard, the count was wealthy.

"You don't sit after dinner here, I suppose," said the count, when he had completed an elaborate washing of his mouth and moustache. "I like this club because we who are strangers have so charming a room for our smoking. It is the best club in London for men who do not belong to it."

"You probably don't sit around after dinner here," said the count after he finished an extensive cleaning of his mouth and mustache. "I really like this club because we, as outsiders, have such a lovely room for smoking. It's the best club in London for men who aren't members."

It occurred to Harry that in the smoking-room there could be no privacy. Three or four men had already spoken to the count, showing that he was well known, giving notice, as it were, that Pateroff would become a public man when once he was placed in a public circle. To have given a dinner to the count, and to have spoken no word to him about Lady Ongar, would be by no means satisfactory to Harry's feelings, though, as it appeared, it might be sufficiently satisfactory to the guest. Harry therefore suggested one bottle of claret. The count agreed, expressing an opinion that the 51 Lafitte was unexceptional. The 51 Lafitte was ordered, and Harry, as he filled his glass, considered the way in which his subject should be introduced.

It dawned on Harry that there could be no privacy in the smoking room. Three or four men had already chatted with the count, showing he was well-known, signaling that Pateroff would become a public figure once he entered a public setting. Not mentioning Lady Ongar when hosting the count would definitely not sit well with Harry, even though it seemed fine for the guest. So, Harry suggested ordering a bottle of claret. The count agreed and commented that the 51 Lafitte was excellent. The 51 Lafitte was ordered, and as Harry poured his glass, he thought about how to introduce his topic.

"You knew Lord Ongar, I think, abroad?"

"You knew Lord Ongar, right, when you were overseas?"

"Lord Ongar,—abroad! Oh, yes, very well; and for many years here in London; and at Vienna; and very early in life at St. Petersburg. I knew Lord Ongar first in Russia when he was attached to the embassy as Frederic Courton. His father, Lord Courton, was then alive, as was also his grandfather. He was a nice, good-looking lad then."

"Lord Ongar—overseas! Oh, yes, very well; and for many years here in London; and in Vienna; and quite early in life in St. Petersburg. I first met Lord Ongar in Russia when he was working at the embassy as Frederic Courton. His father, Lord Courton, was still alive, as was his grandfather. He was a nice, good-looking young man back then."

"As regards his being nice, he seems to have changed a good deal before he died." This the count noticed by simply shrugging his shoulders and smiling as he sipped his wine. "By all that I can hear he became a horrid brute when he married," said Harry, energetically.

"As for him being nice, he really seems to have changed a lot before he died." The count acknowledged this by just shrugging his shoulders and smiling as he took a sip of his wine. "From what I’ve heard, he turned into a terrible jerk after he got married," said Harry, passionately.

"He was not pleasant when he was ill at Florence," said the count.

"He was not pleasant when he was sick in Florence," said the count.

"She must have had a terrible time with him," said Harry.

"She must have had a rough time with him," said Harry.

The count put up his hands, again shrugged his shoulders, and then shook his head. "She knew he was no longer an Adonis when he married her."

The count raised his hands, shrugged his shoulders again, and then shook his head. "She knew he wasn't a Adonis anymore when she married him."

"An Adonis! No; she did not expect an Adonis; but she thought he would have something of the honour and feelings of a man."

"An Adonis! No; she didn't expect an Adonis; but she thought he would have some of the honor and feelings of a man."

"She found it uncomfortable, no doubt. He did too much of this, you know," said the count, raising his glass to his lips; "and he didn't do it with 51 Lafitte. That was Ongar's fault. All the world knew it for the last ten years. No one knew it better than Hugh Clavering."

"She felt uneasy, that's for sure. He overdid it, you know," said the count, lifting his glass to his lips; "and he didn’t do it with 51 Lafitte. That was Ongar's mistake. Everyone has known it for the last decade. No one knew it better than Hugh Clavering."

"But—" said Harry, and then he stopped. He hardly knew what it was that he wished to learn from the man, though he certainly did wish to learn something. He had thought that the count would himself have talked about Lady Ongar and those Florentine days, but this he did not seem disposed to do. "Shall we have our cigars now?" said Count Pateroff.

"But—" Harry said, and then he paused. He barely knew what he wanted to find out from the man, but he definitely wanted to learn something. He had expected the count to bring up Lady Ongar and those days in Florence, but he didn’t seem interested in doing that. "Should we light up our cigars now?" Count Pateroff asked.

"One moment, if you don't mind."

"Just a moment, if you don't mind."

"Certainly, certainly. There is no hurry."

"Absolutely, no rush at all."

"You will take no more wine?"

"You aren't going to have any more wine?"

"No more wine. I take my wine at dinner, as you saw."

"No more wine. I have my wine at dinner, like you saw."

"I want to ask you one special question,—about Lady Ongar."

"I have one important question to ask you—about Lady Ongar."

"I will say anything in her favour that you please. I am always ready to say anything in the favour of any lady, and, if needs be, to swear it. But anything against any lady nobody ever heard me say."

"I'll say anything positive about her that you want. I'm always ready to support any woman, and if necessary, I'll even swear to it. But as for anything negative about a woman, no one has ever heard me say that."

Harry was sharp enough to perceive that any assertion made under such a stipulation was worse than nothing. It was as when a man, in denying the truth of a statement, does so with an assurance that on that subject he should consider himself justified in telling any number of lies. "I did not write the book,—but you have no right to ask the question; and I should say that I had not, even if I had." Pateroff was speaking of Lady Ongar in this way, and Harry hated him for doing so.

Harry was smart enough to realize that any claim made under those conditions was worse than useless. It was like when someone, while denying the truth of a statement, feels justified in lying as much as they want about that topic. "I didn’t write the book—but you have no right to ask that question; and I’d deny it even if I did." Pateroff was talking about Lady Ongar like this, and Harry really disliked him for it.

"I don't want you to say any good of her," said he, "or any evil."

"I don't want you to say anything good or bad about her," he said.

"I certainly shall say no evil of her."

"I definitely won’t speak badly of her."

"But I think you know that she has been most cruelly treated."

"But I think you know that she has been treated really badly."

"Well, there is about seven—thousand—pounds a year, I think! Seven—thousand—a year! Not francs, but pounds! We poor foreigners lose ourselves in amazement when we hear about your English fortunes. Seven thousand pounds a year for a lady all alone, and a beau-tiful house! A house so beautiful, they tell me!"

"Well, I think it’s about seven thousand pounds a year! Seven thousand a year! Not francs, but pounds! We poor foreigners are amazed when we hear about your English wealth. Seven thousand pounds a year for a lady all alone, and a gorgeous house! A house so beautiful, I’ve been told!"

"What has that to do with it?" said Harry; whereupon the count again shrugged his shoulders. "What has that to do with it? Because the man was rich he was not justified in ill-treating his wife. Did he not bring false accusations against her, in order that he might rob her after his death of all that of which you think so much? Did he not bear false witness against her, to his own dishonour?"

"What does that have to do with it?" Harry asked, and the count shrugged his shoulders again. "What does that have to do with it? Just because the man was rich doesn’t mean he was right to mistreat his wife. Didn’t he make false accusations against her so he could take everything she values after he died? Didn’t he bear false witness against her, bringing shame upon himself?"

"Did he not bear false witness against her?"
"Did he not lie about her?"
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"She has got the money, I think,—and the beautiful house."

"She's got the money, I think,—and the beautiful house."

"But her name has been covered with lies."

"But her name has been tarnished with lies."

"What can I do? Why do you ask me? I know nothing. Look here, Mr. Clavering, if you want to make any inquiry you had better go to my sister. I don't see what good it will do, but she will talk to you by the hour together, if you wish it. Let us smoke."

"What can I do? Why are you asking me? I don’t know anything. Look, Mr. Clavering, if you want to ask something, you should talk to my sister. I don't see how it will help, but she’ll chat with you for hours if you want. Let’s smoke."

"Your sister?"

"Is that your sister?"

"Yes, my sister. Madame Gordeloup is her name. Has not Lady Ongar mentioned my sister? They are inseparables. My sister lives in Mount Street."

"Yes, my sister. Her name is Madame Gordeloup. Hasn't Lady Ongar mentioned her? They are inseparable. My sister lives on Mount Street."

"With you?"

"Are you with me?"

"No, not with me; I do not live in Mount Street. I have my address sometimes at her house."

"No, not with me; I don't live on Mount Street. I sometimes use her address."

"Madame Gordeloup?"

"Ms. Gordeloup?"

"Yes, Madame Gordeloup. She is Lady Ongar's friend. She will talk to you."

"Yes, Madam Gordeloup. She’s a friend of Lady Ongar. She'll talk to you."

"Will you introduce me, Count Pateroff?"

"Can you introduce me, Count Pateroff?"

"Oh, no; it is not necessary. You can go to Mount Street, and she will be delighted. There is the card. And now we will smoke." Harry felt that he could not, with good-breeding, detain the count any longer, and, therefore, rising from his chair, led the way into the smoking-room. When there, the man of the world separated himself from his young friend, of whose enthusiasm he had perhaps had enough, and was soon engaged in conversation with sundry other men of his own standing. Harry soon perceived that his guest had no further need of his countenance, and went home to Bloomsbury Square by no means satisfied with his new acquaintance.

"Oh, no; that’s not necessary. You can head over to Mount Street, and she’ll be thrilled. Here’s the card. Now, let’s smoke." Harry felt he couldn't keep the count any longer without being rude, so he got up from his chair and led the way to the smoking room. Once there, the worldly man distanced himself from his younger friend, who he might have had enough of, and quickly started chatting with a few other men of his status. Harry soon realized that his guest didn’t need his company anymore and went home to Bloomsbury Square feeling less than satisfied with his new acquaintance.

On the next day he dined in Onslow Crescent with the Burtons, and when there he said nothing about Lady Ongar or Count Pateroff. He was not aware that he had any special reason for being silent on the subject, but he made up his mind that the Burtons were people so far removed in their sphere of life from Lady Ongar, that the subject would not be suitable in Onslow Crescent. It was his lot in life to be concerned with people of the two classes. He did not at all mean to say,—even to himself,—that he liked the Ongar class the better; but still, as such was his lot, he must take it as it came, and entertain both subjects of interest, without any commingling of them one with another. Of Lady Ongar and his early love he had spoken to Florence at some length, but he did not find it necessary in his letters to tell her anything of Count Pateroff and his dinner at the Beaufort. Nor did he mention the dinner to his dear friend Cecilia. On this occasion he made himself very happy in Onslow Crescent, playing with the children, chatting with his friend, and enduring, with a good grace, Theodore Burton's sarcasm, when that ever-studious gentleman told him that he was only fit to go about tied to a woman's apron-string.

The next day, he had dinner at Onslow Crescent with the Burtons, and while there, he didn’t bring up Lady Ongar or Count Pateroff. He didn’t think he had any particular reason to stay silent about it, but he decided that the Burtons were so far removed from Lady Ongar’s social circle that the topic wouldn’t be appropriate in Onslow Crescent. It was his fate to deal with people from both classes. He didn’t mean to suggest—even to himself—that he liked the Ongar class more; still, since that was his situation, he had to accept it and engage with both topics of interest without mixing them together. He had talked to Florence at length about Lady Ongar and his first love, but he didn’t feel it was necessary in his letters to mention anything about Count Pateroff or his dinner at the Beaufort. Nor did he bring up the dinner with his dear friend Cecilia. On this occasion, he felt very happy at Onslow Crescent, playing with the kids, chatting with his friend, and graciously putting up with Theodore Burton’s sarcasm when that ever-serious gentleman told him he was only fit to be tied to a woman’s apron strings.

On the following day, about five o'clock, he called in Mount Street. He had doubted much as to this, thinking that at any rate he ought, in the first place, to write and ask permission. But at last he resolved that he would take the count at his word, and presenting himself at the door, he sent up his name. Madame Gordeloup was at home, and in a few moments he found himself in the room in which the lady was sitting, and recognized her whom he had seen with Lady Ongar in Bolton Street. She got up at once, having glanced at the name upon the card, and seemed to know all about him. She shook hands with him cordially, almost squeezing his hand, and bade him sit down near her on the sofa. "She was so glad to see him, for her dear Julie's sake. Julie, as of course he knew, was at 'Ongere' Park. Oh! so happy,"—which, by the by, he did not know,—"and would be up in the course of next week. So many things to do, of course, Mr. Clavering. The house, and the servants, and the park, and the beautiful things of a large country establishment! But it was delightful, and Julie was quite happy!"

The next day, around five o'clock, he stopped by Mount Street. He had seriously considered whether he should first write and ask for permission. But eventually, he decided to take the count at his word and, arriving at the door, he sent up his name. Madame Gordeloup was home, and within moments, he found himself in the room with her. He recognized her from when he had seen her with Lady Ongar in Bolton Street. She stood up right away after glancing at the name on the card and seemed to know all about him. She shook his hand enthusiastically, almost squeezing it, and invited him to sit down near her on the sofa. "She was so glad to see him, for her dear Julie's sake. Julie, as you know, is at 'Ongere' Park. Oh! so happy,"—which, by the way, he didn't know,—"and she would be back next week. So many things to take care of, of course, Mr. Clavering. The house, the servants, the park, and all the beautiful things that come with a large country estate! But it was wonderful, and Julie was very happy!"

No people could be more unlike to each other than this brother and his sister. No human being could have taken Madame Gordeloup for an Englishwoman, though it might be difficult to judge, either from her language or her appearance, of the nationality to which she belonged. She spoke English with great fluency, but every word uttered declared her not to be English. And when she was most fluent she was most incorrect in her language. She was small, eager, and quick, and appeared quite as anxious to talk as her brother had been to hold his tongue. She lived in a small room on the first floor of a small house; and it seemed to Harry that she lived alone. But he had not been long there before she had told him all her history, and explained to him most of her circumstances. That she kept back something is probable; but how many are there who can afford to tell everything?

No two people could be more different than this brother and sister. No one would mistake Madame Gordeloup for an Englishwoman, even though it might be hard to determine her nationality from her speech or her looks. She spoke English very fluently, but each word revealed that she wasn’t English. The more fluent she became, the more incorrect her language was. She was small, eager, and quick, seeming just as keen to chat as her brother had been to stay quiet. She lived in a small room on the first floor of a small house, and it seemed to Harry that she lived alone. But it wasn't long before she shared her entire story with him and explained most of her situation. It's likely that she held back some details, but how many people truly share everything?

Her husband was still living, but he was at St. Petersburg. He was a Frenchman by family, but had been born in Russia. He had been attached to the Russian embassy in London, but was now attached to diplomacy in general in Russia. She did not join him because she loved England,—oh, so much! And, perhaps, her husband might come back again some day. She did not say that she had not seen him for ten years, and was not quite sure whether he was dead or alive; but had she made a clean breast in all things, she might have done so. She said that she was a good deal still at the Russian embassy; but she did not say that she herself was a paid spy. Nor do I say so now, positively; but that was the character given to her by many who knew her. She called her brother Edouard, as though Harry had known the count all his life; and always spoke of Lady Ongar as Julie. She uttered one or two little hints which seemed to imply that she knew everything that had passed between "Julie" and Harry Clavering in early days; and never mentioned Lord Ongar without some term of violent abuse.

Her husband was still alive, but he was in St. Petersburg. He was French by heritage but was born in Russia. He had worked at the Russian embassy in London but was now involved in general diplomacy in Russia. She didn’t go to be with him because she loved England—oh, so much! And maybe her husband would come back someday. She didn’t mention that she hadn’t seen him in ten years and wasn’t entirely sure if he was dead or alive; but if she had been completely honest about everything, she might have. She claimed to still spend quite a bit of time at the Russian embassy; however, she didn’t mention that she was actually a paid spy. I won't say that definitively now, either; but that was the reputation she had among many who knew her. She referred to her brother as Edouard, as if Harry had known the count his whole life; and she always called Lady Ongar Julie. She dropped a couple of hints that suggested she knew all about what had happened between “Julie” and Harry Clavering back in the day, and she never mentioned Lord Ongar without using some term of fierce insult.

"Horrid wretch!" she said, pausing over all the r's in the name she had called him. "It began, you know, from the very first. Of course he had been a fool. An old roué is always a fool to marry. What does he get, you know, for his money? A pretty face. He's tired of that as soon as it's his own. Is it not so, Mr. Clavering? But other people ain't tired of it, and then he becomes jealous. But Lord Ongar was not jealous. He was not man enough to be jealous. Hor-r-rid wr-retch!" She then went on telling many things which, as he listened, almost made Harry Clavering's hair stand on end, and which must not be repeated here. She herself had met her brother in Paris, and had been with him when they encountered the Ongars in that capital. According to her showing, they had, all of them, been together nearly from that time to the day of Lord Ongar's death. But Harry soon learned to feel that he could not believe all that the little lady told him.

"Horrible wretch!" she said, emphasizing every single 'r' in the name she'd called him. "It started, you know, from the very beginning. Of course, he had been a fool. An old playboy is always a fool to marry. What does he get, you know, for his money? A pretty face. He gets tired of that as soon as it's his own. Isn’t that right, Mr. Clavering? But other people aren't tired of it, and then he becomes jealous. But Lord Ongar was not jealous. He wasn't man enough to be jealous. Horrible wretch!" She then went on to share many stories that, as he listened, almost made Harry Clavering's hair stand on end, and which shouldn't be repeated here. She had met her brother in Paris and had been with him when they ran into the Ongars in that city. According to her account, they had all been together nearly from that time until the day of Lord Ongar's death. But Harry soon realized that he couldn't believe everything the little lady told him.

"Edouard was always with him. Poor Edouard!" she said. "There was some money matter between them about écarté. When that wr-retch got to be so bad, he did not like parting with his money,—not even when he had lost it! And Julie had been so good always! Julie and Edouard had done everything for the nasty wr-retch." Harry did not at all like this mingling of the name of Julie and Edouard, though it did not for a moment fill his mind with any suspicion as to Lady Ongar. It made him feel, however, that this woman was dangerous, and that her tongue might be very mischievous if she talked to others as she did to him. As he looked at her,—and being now in her own room she was not dressed with scrupulous care,—and as he listened to her, he could not conceive what Lady Ongar had seen in her that she should have made a friend of her. Her brother, the count, was undoubtedly a gentleman in his manners and way of life, but he did not know by what name to call this woman, who called Lady Ongar Julie. She was altogether unlike any ladies whom he had known.

"Edouard was always with him. Poor Edouard!" she said. "There was some financial issue between them over écarté. When that jerk started losing big, he hated giving up his money— not even when he lost it! And Julie had always been so good! Julie and Edouard had done everything for that awful jerk." Harry didn’t like how she mixed up Julie and Edouard’s names, although it didn’t make him suspicious of Lady Ongar. It did make him feel that this woman was dangerous, and her words could be quite harmful if she spoke to others the way she did to him. As he looked at her—now in her own room, she wasn’t dressed very carefully—and listened to her, he couldn't understand what Lady Ongar saw in her that made her a friend. Her brother, the count, was definitely a gentleman in his manners and way of life, but he didn’t know what to call this woman who referred to Lady Ongar as Julie. She was nothing like any ladies he had known.

"You know that Julie will be in town next week?"

"You know that Julie is going to be in town next week?"

"No; I did not know when she was to return."

"No, I didn’t know when she was coming back."

"Oh, yes; she has business with those people in South Audley Street on Thursday. Poor dear! Those lawyers are so harassing! But when people have seven—thousand—pounds a year, they must put up with lawyers." As she pronounced those talismanic words, which to her were almost celestial, Harry perceived for the first time that there was some sort of resemblance between her and the count. He could see that they were brother and sister. "I shall go to her directly she comes, and of course I will tell her how good you have been to come to me. And Edouard has been dining with you? How good of you. He told me how charming you are,"—Harry was quite sure then that she was fibbing,—"and that it was so pleasant! Edouard is very much attached to Julie; very much. Though, of course, all that was mere nonsense; just lies told by that wicked lord. Bah! what did he know?" Harry by this time was beginning to wish that he had never found his way to Mount Street.

"Oh, yes; she has a meeting with those people in South Audley Street on Thursday. Poor thing! Those lawyers are so annoying! But when you have seven thousand pounds a year, you have to deal with lawyers." As she said those magical words, which felt almost heavenly to her, Harry noticed for the first time that there was a resemblance between her and the count. He could see they were brother and sister. "I’ll go see her as soon as she arrives, and of course, I’ll tell her how wonderful you’ve been to come to me. And Edouard has been dining with you? That’s so kind of you. He told me how lovely you are,"—Harry was pretty sure she was lying—"and that it was so nice! Edouard is really fond of Julie; very much so. Although, of course, all that was just nonsense; just lies told by that wicked lord. Ugh! What did he know?" By this point, Harry was starting to wish he had never come to Mount Street.

"Of course they were lies," he said roughly.

"Of course they were lies," he said harshly.

"Of course, mon cher. Those things always are lies, and so wicked! What good do they do?"

"Of course, my dear. Those things are always lies, and so evil! What good do they do?"

"Lies never do any good," said Harry.

"Lies never help," Harry said.

To so wide a proposition as this madame was not prepared to give an unconditional assent; she therefore shrugged her shoulders and once again looked like her brother.

To such a broad statement, the lady wasn't ready to agree without reservations; she shrugged her shoulders and once again resembled her brother.

"Ah!" she said. "Julie is a happy woman now. Seven—thousand—pounds a year! One does not know how to believe it; does one?"

"Ah!" she said. "Julie is a happy woman now. Seven—thousand—pounds a year! It's hard to believe it, isn't it?"

"I never heard the amount of her income," said Harry.

"I never heard how much she makes," said Harry.

"It is all that," said the Franco-Pole, energetically, "every franc of it, besides the house! I know it. She told me herself. Yes. What woman would risk that, you know; and his life, you may say, as good as gone? Of course they were lies."

"It’s exactly that," said the Franco-Polish man with enthusiasm, "every franc of it, along with the house! I know it. She told me herself. Yes. What woman would take that risk, especially when his life is practically over? Of course, they were lies."

"I don't think you understand her, Madame Gordeloup."

"I don’t think you get her, Madame Gordeloup."

"Oh, yes; I know her, so well. And love her—oh, Mr. Clavering, I love her so dearly! Is she not charming? So beautiful you know, and grand. Such a will, too! That is what I like in a woman. Such a courage! She never flinched in those horrid days, never. And when he called her,—you know what,—she only looked at him, just looked at him, miserable object. Oh, it was beautiful!" And Madame Gordeloup, rising in her energy from her seat for the purpose, strove to throw upon Harry such another glance as the injured, insulted wife had thrown upon her foul-tongued, dying lord.

"Oh, yes; I know her really well. And I love her—oh, Mr. Clavering, I love her so much! Isn't she charming? So beautiful, and so impressive. She's got such strong will, too! That's what I admire in a woman. Such courage! She never backed down during those terrible days, not once. And when he called her—well, you know what I mean—she just looked at him, just looked at him, that miserable creature. Oh, it was stunning!" And Madame Gordeloup, rising with passion from her seat for the purpose, tried to give Harry the same look that the wronged, insulted wife had shot at her foul-mouthed, dying husband.

"She will marry," said Madame Gordeloup, changing her tone with a suddenness that made Harry start; "yes, she will marry of course. Your English widows always marry if they have money. They are wrong, and she will be wrong; but she will marry."

"She's going to get married," said Madame Gordeloup, shifting her tone so suddenly that it surprised Harry; "yes, she's definitely going to get married. Your English widows always remarry if they have money. They’re making a mistake, and she will too; but she will get married."

"I do not know how that may be," said Harry, looking foolish.

"I don't know how that could be," said Harry, looking silly.

"I tell you I know she will marry, Mr. Clavering; I told Edouard so yesterday. He merely smiled. It would hardly do for him, she has so much will. Edouard has a will also."

"I’m telling you, I know she’s going to get married, Mr. Clavering; I mentioned it to Edouard yesterday. He just smiled. It wouldn’t really work for him; she has so much determination. Edouard has determination too."

"All men have, I suppose."

"All guys have, I guess."

"Ah, yes; but there is a difference. A sum of money down, if a man is to marry, is better than a widow's dower. If she dies, you know, he looks so foolish. And she is grand and will want to spend everything. Is she much older than you, Mr. Clavering? Of course I know Julie's age, though perhaps you do not. What will you give me to tell?" And the woman leered at him with a smile which made Harry think that she was almost more than mortal. He found himself quite unable to cope with her in conversation, and soon after this got up to take his leave. "You will come again," she said. "Do. I like you so much. And when Julie is in town, we shall be able to see her together, and I will be your friend. Believe me."

"Ah, yes; but there’s a difference. A lump sum of money upfront is better than a widow's inheritance when a man is getting married. If she passes away, you know, he looks so ridiculous. Plus, she’s sophisticated and will want to spend everything. Is she much older than you, Mr. Clavering? Of course, I know Julie's age, though you might not. What will you give me to find out?" And the woman gave him a sly smile that made Harry feel like she was almost otherworldly. He found himself completely thrown off in their conversation and soon after decided to get up and leave. "You’ll come back, won’t you?" she said. "Please do. I really like you. And when Julie is in town, we can see her together, and I’ll be your friend. Trust me."

Harry was very far from believing her, and did not in the least require her friendship. Her friendship indeed! How could any decent English man or woman wish for the friendship of such a creature as that? It was thus that he thought of her as he walked away from Mount Street, making heavy accusations, within his own breast, against Lady Ongar as he did so. Julia! He repeated the name over to himself a dozen times, thinking that the flavour of it was lost since it had been contaminated so often by that vile tongue. But what concern was it of his? Let her be Julia to whom she would, she could never be Julia again to him. But she was his friend—Lady Ongar, and he told himself plainly that his friend had been wrong in having permitted herself to hold any intimacy with such a woman as that. No doubt Lady Ongar had been subjected to very trying troubles in the last months of her husband's life, but no circumstances could justify her, if she continued to endorse the false cordiality of that horribly vulgar and evil-minded little woman. As regarded the grave charges brought against Lady Ongar, Harry still gave no credit to them, still looked upon them as calumnies, in spite of the damning advocacy of Sophie and her brother; but he felt that she must have dabbled in very dirty water to have returned to England with such claimants on her friendship as these. He had not much admired the count, but the count's sister had been odious to him. "I will be your friend. Believe me." Harry Clavering stamped upon the pavement as he thought of the little Pole's offer to him. She be his friend! No, indeed;—not if there were no other friend for him in all London.

Harry was far from believing her and definitely didn’t want her friendship. Her friendship, really! How could any decent English man or woman want to be friends with someone like her? That’s how he thought of her as he walked away from Mount Street, making serious accusations in his mind against Lady Ongar. Julia! He repeated the name to himself a dozen times, feeling like it had lost its meaning since it had been tainted so many times by that awful person. But what did it matter to him? Let her be Julia to whoever she liked; she could never be Julia to him again. Still, she was his friend—Lady Ongar—and he told himself that it was wrong of his friend to have any closeness with someone like her. Sure, Lady Ongar had gone through a lot during the last months of her husband’s life, but nothing could excuse her if she continued to pretend that she was okay with that horribly rude and evil little woman. As for the serious accusations against Lady Ongar, Harry still didn’t believe them and saw them as slanders, despite Sophie and her brother pushing them; but he felt she must have gotten herself involved with some very dirty dealings to return to England with people like that claiming her friendship. He hadn’t liked the count much, but the count’s sister had been absolutely detestable to him. "I will be your friend. Believe me." Harry Clavering stomped on the pavement as he thought of that little Pole’s offer to him. Be his friend! Absolutely not—even if he had no other friends in all of London.

Sophie, too, had her thoughts about him. Sophie was very anxious in this matter, and was resolved to stick as close to her Julie as possible. "I will be his friend or his enemy;—let him choose." That had been Sophie's reflection on the matter when she was left alone.

Sophie also had her thoughts about him. She felt very anxious about it and was determined to stay as close to her Julie as she could. "I will be his friend or his enemy; it's up to him." That had been Sophie's reflection on the matter when she was left alone.

 

 

CHAPTER XV.

AN EVENING IN BOLTON STREET.

Ten days after his visit in Mount Street, Harry received the note which Lady Ongar had written to him on the night of her arrival in London. It was brought to Mr. Beilby's office by her own footman early in the morning; but Harry was there at the time, and was thus able to answer it, telling Lady Ongar that he would come as she had desired. She had commenced her letter "Dear Harry," and he well remembered that when she had before written she had called him "Dear Mr. Clavering." And though the note contained only half-a-dozen ordinary words, it seemed to him to be affectionate, and almost loving. Had she not been eager to see him, she would hardly thus have written to him on the very instant of her return. "Dear Lady Ongar," he wrote, "I shall dine at my club, and be with you about eight. Yours always, H. C." After that he could hardly bring himself to work satisfactorily during the whole day. Since his interview with the Franco-Polish lady he had thought a good deal about himself, and had resolved to work harder and to love Florence Burton more devotedly than ever. The nasty little woman had said certain words to him which had caused him to look into his own breast and to tell himself that this was necessary. As the love was easier than the work, he began his new tasks on the following morning by writing a long and very affectionate letter to his own Flo, who was still staying at Clavering rectory;—a letter so long and so affectionate that Florence, in her ecstasy of delight, made Fanny read it, and confess that, as a love-letter, it was perfect.

Ten days after his visit to Mount Street, Harry received the note that Lady Ongar had written to him on the night she arrived in London. It was delivered to Mr. Beilby's office by her footman early in the morning; Harry was there at that moment, so he was able to respond right away, letting Lady Ongar know that he would come as she had requested. She had started her letter with "Dear Harry," and he clearly remembered that when she had written to him before, she referred to him as "Dear Mr. Clavering." Even though the note contained only a few ordinary words, it felt warm and nearly affectionate to him. If she hadn't been eager to see him, she probably wouldn't have written to him the very moment she got back. "Dear Lady Ongar," he wrote back, "I'll be dining at my club and will be with you around eight. Yours always, H. C." After that, he found it difficult to focus on his work for the rest of the day. Since his meeting with the Franco-Polish lady, he had spent a lot of time reflecting on himself and decided to work harder and love Florence Burton more devotedly than ever. The unpleasant woman had said a few things that made him examine his own feelings and realize this change was needed. Since love came more easily than work, he started his new commitments the next morning by writing a long and very loving letter to his own Flo, who was still at Clavering rectory—a letter so lengthy and affectionate that Florence, in her joy, had Fanny read it and admit that, as a love letter, it was perfect.

"It's great nonsense, all the same," said Fanny.

"It's all great nonsense, anyway," said Fanny.

"It isn't nonsense at all," said Florence; "and if it were, it would not signify. Is it true? That's the question."

"It isn't nonsense at all," Florence said. "And even if it were, it wouldn't matter. Is it true? That's the real question."

"I'm sure it's true," said Fanny.

"I'm sure that's true," Fanny said.

"And so am I," said Florence. "I don't want any one to tell me that."

"And so am I," Florence said. "I don't want anyone to tell me that."

"Then why did you ask, you simpleton?" Florence indeed was having a happy time of it at Clavering rectory. When Fanny called her a simpleton, she threw her arms round Fanny's neck and kissed her.

"Then why did you ask, you fool?" Florence was really enjoying herself at Clavering rectory. When Fanny called her a fool, she wrapped her arms around Fanny's neck and kissed her.

And Harry kept his resolve about the work too, investigating plans with a resolution to understand them which was almost successful. During those days he would remain at his office till past four o'clock, and would then walk away with Theodore Burton, dining sometimes in Onslow Crescent, and going there sometimes in the evening after dinner. And when there he would sit and read; and once when Cecilia essayed to talk to him, he told her to keep her apron-strings to herself. Then Theodore laughed and apologized, and Cecilia said that too much work made Jack a dull boy; and then Theodore laughed again, stretching out his legs and arms as he rested a moment from his own study, and declared that, under those circumstances, Harry never would be dull. And Harry, on those evenings, would be taken upstairs to see the bairns in their cots; and as he stood with their mother looking down upon the children, pretty words would be said about Florence and his future life; and all was going merry as a marriage bell. But on that morning, when the note had come from Lady Ongar, Harry could work no more to his satisfaction. He scrawled upon his blotting-paper, and made no progress whatsoever towards the understanding of anything. It was the day on which, in due course, he would write to Florence; and he did write to her. But Florence did not show this letter to Fanny, claiming for it any meed of godlike perfection. It was a stupid, short letter, in which he declared that he was very busy, and that his head ached. In a postscript he told her that he was going to see Lady Ongar that evening. This he communicated to her under an idea that by doing so he made everything right. And I think that the telling of it did relieve his conscience.

And Harry stuck to his commitment to the work too, looking into plans with a determination to understand them that was nearly successful. During those days, he stayed in his office until after four o'clock, and then walked away with Theodore Burton, sometimes having dinner in Onslow Crescent and going there in the evening after dinner. While there, he would sit and read; and once when Cecilia tried to talk to him, he told her to keep her apron strings to herself. Theodore laughed and apologized, and Cecilia remarked that too much work made Jack a dull boy; Theodore laughed again, stretching out his arms and legs as he took a break from his own studying, and declared that under those circumstances, Harry would never be dull. On those evenings, he would be taken upstairs to see the kids in their cribs; and as he stood with their mother looking down at the children, nice words would be exchanged about Florence and his future life; and everything was going as happily as a wedding bell. But on that morning, when the note from Lady Ongar arrived, Harry could no longer work to his satisfaction. He scribbled on his blotting paper and made no progress at all toward understanding anything. It was the day he was supposed to write to Florence, and he did write to her. But Florence didn't show this letter to Fanny, believing it deserved no praise for being perfect. It was a dumb, short letter, where he mentioned that he was very busy and had a headache. In a postscript, he informed her that he was going to see Lady Ongar that evening. He thought that by sharing this, he was making everything right. And I think that telling her did ease his conscience.

He left the office soon after three, having brought himself to believe in the headache, and sauntered down to his club. He found men playing whist there, and, as whist might be good for his head, he joined them. They won his money, and scolded him for playing badly till he was angry, and then he went out for a walk by himself. As he went along Piccadilly, he saw Sophie Gordeloup coming towards him, trotting along, with her dress held well up over her ankles, eager, quick, and, as he said to himself, clearly intent upon some mischief. He endeavoured to avoid her by turning up the Burlington Arcade, but she was too quick for him, and was walking up the arcade by his side before he had been able to make up his mind as to the best mode of ridding himself of such a companion.

He left the office shortly after three, convincing himself that he had a headache, and strolled down to his club. He found some guys playing whist there, and since whist might help his head, he joined in. They took his money and scolded him for playing poorly until he got angry, so he left to take a walk by himself. As he walked along Piccadilly, he saw Sophie Gordeloup coming toward him, trotting along with her dress pulled up over her ankles, eager and quick, and, as he told himself, clearly up to no good. He tried to avoid her by turning up the Burlington Arcade, but she was too fast for him and was walking beside him in the arcade before he could figure out how to get rid of her.

"Ah, Mr. Clavering, I am so glad to see you. I was with Julie last night. She was fagged, very much fagged; the journey, you know, and the business. But yet so handsome! And we talked of you. Yes, Mr. Clavering; and I told her how good you had been in coming to me. She said you were always good; yes, she did. When shall you see her?"

"Ah, Mr. Clavering, it’s great to see you. I was with Julie last night. She was exhausted, really worn out; it was the journey and everything. But she looked so beautiful! We talked about you. Yes, Mr. Clavering; and I told her how kind you had been in coming to see me. She said you were always kind; yes, she did. When will you see her?"

Harry Clavering was a bad hand at fibbing, and a bad hand also at leaving a question unanswered. When questioned in this way he did not know what to do but to answer the truth. He would much rather not have said that he was going to Bolton Street that evening, but he could find no alternative. "I believe I shall see her this evening," he said, simply venturing to mitigate the evil of making the communication by rendering it falsely doubtful. There are men who fib with so bad a grace and with so little tact that they might as well not fib at all. They not only never arrive at success, but never even venture to expect it.

Harry Clavering wasn't good at lying, and he was just as bad at avoiding questions. When faced with such inquiries, he felt he had no choice but to tell the truth. He would have preferred not to admit that he was going to Bolton Street that evening, but he couldn't come up with another option. "I think I'll see her this evening," he said, trying to soften the blow of his statement by making it sound uncertain. There are people who lie so awkwardly and without any finesse that they might as well just be honest. They never succeed in their deceit and don't even dare to expect to.

"Ah, this evening. Let me see. I don't think I can be there to-night; Madame Berenstoff receives at the embassy."

"Ah, this evening. Let me think. I don’t think I can make it tonight; Madame Berenstoff is hosting at the embassy."

"Good afternoon," said Harry, turning into Truefit's, the hairdresser's, shop.

"Good afternoon," Harry said as he walked into Truefit's, the hair salon.

"Ah, very well," said Sophie to herself; "just so. It will be better, much better. He is simply one lout, and why should he have it all? My God, what fools, what louts, are these Englishmen!" Now having read Sophie's thoughts so far, we will leave her to walk up the remainder of the arcade by herself.

"Alright then," Sophie said to herself; "just like that. It'll be better, way better. He's just one idiot, and why should he get everything? Good grief, what fools, what idiots these English men are!" Now that we've caught a glimpse of Sophie's thoughts, we'll let her finish walking down the rest of the arcade on her own.

I do not know that Harry's visit to Truefit's establishment had been in any degree caused by his engagement for the evening. I fancy that he had simply taken to ground at the first hole, as does a hunted fox. But now that he was there he had his head put in order, and thought that he looked the better for the operation. He then went back to his club, and when he sauntered into the card-room one old gentleman looked askance at him, as though inquiring angrily whether he had come there to make fresh misery. "Thank you; no,—I won't play again," said Harry. Then the old gentleman was appeased, and offered him a pinch of snuff. "Have you seen the new book about whist?" said the old gentleman. "It is very useful,—very useful. I'll send you a copy if you will allow me." Then Harry left the room, and went down to dinner.

I don't think Harry's visit to Truefit's place was because of his plans for the evening. I imagine he just wanted to hide out at the first chance he got, like a hunted fox. But now that he was there, he got himself sorted out and felt he looked better for it. He then went back to his club, and when he strolled into the card room, one older gentleman gave him a sideways glance, seemingly annoyed and wondering if he was there to bring more trouble. "Thanks, but no—I won't play again," Harry said. This calmed the older gentleman, who then offered him a pinch of snuff. "Have you seen the new book on whist?" the older man asked. "It’s really useful—very useful. I’ll send you a copy if that’s okay with you." After that, Harry left the room and headed down to dinner.

It was a little past eight when he knocked at Lady Ongar's door. I fear he had calculated that if he were punctual to the moment, she would think that he thought the matter to be important. It was important to him, and he was willing that she should know that it was so. But there are degrees in everything, and therefore he was twenty minutes late. He was not the first man who has weighed the diplomatic advantage of being after his time. But all those ideas went from him at once when she met him almost at the door of the room, and, taking him by the hand, said that she was "so glad to see him,—so very glad. Fancy, Harry, I haven't seen an old friend since I saw you last. You don't know how hard all that seems."

It was a little past eight when he knocked on Lady Ongar's door. I think he believed that if he was exactly on time, she would think he considered the matter important. It was important to him, and he wanted her to know that. But timing is everything, and so he ended up being twenty minutes late. He wasn't the first person to realize the diplomatic advantage of being fashionably late. But all those thoughts disappeared the moment she greeted him right by the door of the room, took his hand, and said she was "so glad to see him—so very glad. Can you imagine, Harry? I haven't seen an old friend since the last time I saw you. You don't know how difficult that feels."

"It is hard," said he; and when he felt the pressure of her hand, and saw the brightness of her eye, and when her dress rustled against him as he followed her to her seat, and he became sensible of the influence of her presence, all his diplomacy vanished, and he was simply desirous of devoting himself to her service. Of course, any such devotion was to be given without detriment to that other devotion which he owed to Florence Burton. But this stipulation, though it was made, was made quickly, and with a confused brain.

"It's tough," he said; and when he felt her hand squeeze his, saw the sparkle in her eye, and felt her dress brush against him as he followed her to her seat, he became aware of the power of her presence. All his careful planning faded away, and he just wanted to dedicate himself to her. Naturally, any devotion like that had to come without harming his other commitment to Florence Burton. But this condition, even though he mentioned it, was made in a rush and with a jumbled mind.

"Yes,—it is hard," she said. "Harry, sometimes I think I shall go mad. It is more than I can bear. I could bear it if it hadn't been my own fault,—all my own fault."

"Yes, it’s hard," she said. "Harry, sometimes I think I’m going to lose it. It’s more than I can handle. I could manage if it weren’t because of my own mistakes—my own fault."

There was a suddenness about this which took him quite by surprise. No doubt it had been her own fault. He also had told himself that; though, of course, he would make no such charge to her. "You have not recovered yet," he said, "from what you have suffered lately. Things will look brighter to you after a while."

There was something sudden about this that caught him completely off guard. He had to admit it was largely her fault. He had told himself that; though, of course, he wouldn’t bring it up to her. "You haven’t fully recovered from what you’ve been through lately," he said, "Things will seem better to you after some time."

"Will they? Ah,—I do not know. But come, Harry; come and sit down, and let me get you some tea. There is no harm, I suppose, in having you here,—is there?"

"Will they? Ah, I don't know. But come on, Harry; come and sit down, and let me make you some tea. I suppose there's no harm in having you here, right?"

"Harm, Lady Ongar?"

"Harm, Lady Ongar?"

"Yes,—harm, Lady Ongar." As she repeated her own name after him, nearly in his tone, she smiled once again; and then she looked as she used to look in the old days, when she would be merry with him. "It is hard to know what a woman may do, and what she may not. When my husband was ill and dying, I never left his bedside. From the moment of my marrying him till his death, I hardly spoke to a man but in his presence; and when once I did, it was he that had sent him. And for all that people have turned their backs upon me. You and I were old friends, Harry, and something more once,—were we not? But I jilted you, as you were man enough to tell me. How I did respect you when you dared to speak the truth to me. Men don't know women, or they would be harder to them."

"Yes—harm, Lady Ongar." As she repeated her name after him, nearly mimicking his tone, she smiled again; then she looked like she used to in the old days when she'd have fun with him. "It's tough to know what a woman can do and what she can't. When my husband was sick and dying, I never left his side. From the moment I married him until his death, I hardly spoke to a man unless he was there with me; and when I did, it was because he had sent him. Despite all that, people have turned their backs on me. You and I were old friends, Harry, and something more at one point—weren't we? But I jilted you, just like you were bold enough to tell me. I really respected you when you had the courage to speak the truth to me. Men don't understand women, or they’d be more considerate of them."

"I did not mean to be hard to you."

"I didn't mean to be hard on you."

"If you had taken me by the shoulders and shaken me, and have declared that before God you would not allow such wickedness, I should have obeyed you. I know I should." Harry thought of Florence, and could not bring himself to say that he wished it had been so. "But where would you have been then, Harry? I was wrong and false and a beast to marry that man; but I should not, therefore, have been right to marry you and ruin you. It would have been ruin, you know, and we should simply have been fools."

"If you had grabbed me by the shoulders and shaken me, and declared before God that you wouldn’t allow such wrongdoing, I would have listened to you. I know I would." Harry thought about Florence and couldn’t bring himself to say he wished it had happened that way. "But where would that have left you, Harry? I was wrong, untrue, and terrible for marrying that man; but that doesn’t mean it would have been right for me to marry you and mess up your life. It would have messed up your life, you know, and we would just have been fools."

"The folly was very pleasant," said he.

"The foolishness was really enjoyable," he said.

"Yes, yes; I will not deny that. But then the wisdom and the prudence afterwards! Oh, Harry, that was not pleasant. That was not pleasant! But what was I saying? Oh! about the propriety of your being here. It is so hard to know what is proper. As I have been married, I suppose I may receive whom I please. Is not that the law?"

"Yes, yes; I won’t deny that. But the wisdom and the caution afterward! Oh, Harry, that was rough. That was rough! But what was I saying? Oh! about whether it's appropriate for you to be here. It's so hard to know what's proper. Now that I'm married, I guess I can have whoever I want over. Isn’t that the rule?"

"You may receive me, I should think. Your sister is my cousin's wife." Harry's matter-of-fact argument did as well as anything else, for it turned her thought at the moment.

"You might accept me, I believe. Your sister is married to my cousin." Harry's straightforward point worked just as well as anything else, as it shifted her focus at that moment.

"My sister, Harry! If there was nothing to make us friends but our connection through Sir Hugh Clavering, I do not know that I should be particularly anxious to see you. How unmanly he has been, and how cruel."

"My sister, Harry! If our only connection was through Sir Hugh Clavering, I wouldn’t be too eager to meet you. He has been so unmanly and so cruel."

"Very cruel," said Harry. Then he thought of Archie and Archie's suit. "But he is willing to change all that now. Hermione asked me the other day to persuade you to go to Clavering."

"That’s really harsh," said Harry. Then he thought about Archie and his suit. "But he’s ready to change all that now. Hermione asked me the other day to convince you to go to Clavering."

"And have you come here to use your eloquence for that purpose? I will never go to Clavering again, Harry, unless it should be yours and your wife should offer to receive me. Then I'd pack up for the dear, dull, solemn old place though I was on the other side of Europe."

"And did you come here to use your charm for that? I will never go back to Clavering again, Harry, unless it's your place and your wife invites me. Then I’d pack my bags for that dear, dull, serious old place even if I were on the other side of Europe."

"It will never be mine."

"It'll never be mine."

"Probably not, and probably, therefore, I shall never be there again. No; I can forgive an injury, but not an insult,—not an insult such as that. I will not go to Clavering; so, Harry, you may save your eloquence. Hermione I shall be glad to see whenever she will come to me. If you can persuade her to that, you will persuade her to a charity."

"Probably not, and because of that, I likely won't be going back there again. No; I can forgive an injury, but not an insult—not an insult like that. I'm not going to Clavering; so, Harry, you can save your speech. I'll be happy to see Hermione whenever she decides to visit me. If you can convince her of that, you'll be doing her a favor."

"She goes nowhere, I think, without his—his—"

"She doesn’t go anywhere, I think, without his—his—"

"Without his permission. Of course she does not. That, I suppose, is all as it should be. And he is such a tyrant that he will give no such permission. He would tell her, I suppose, that her sister was no fit companion for her."

"Without his approval. Of course she doesn’t. I guess that’s just how it is. And he’s such a control freak that he wouldn’t grant any approval. He would probably tell her that her sister isn’t a suitable friend for her."

"He could not say that now, as he has asked you there."

"He can't say that now since he asked you there."

"Ah, I don't know that. He would say one thing first and another after, just as it would suit him. He has some object in wishing that I should go there, I suppose." Harry, who knew the object, and who was too faithful to betray Lady Clavering, even though he was altogether hostile to his cousin Archie's suit, felt a little proud of his position, but said nothing in answer to this. "But I shall not go; nor will I see him, or go to his house when he comes up to London. When do they come, Harry?"

"Honestly, I don’t know. He’ll say one thing and then change it to something else, depending on what works for him. He must have some reason for wanting me to go there, I guess." Harry, who understood the reason and was too loyal to betray Lady Clavering, even though he completely opposed his cousin Archie's proposal, felt a bit proud of where he stood but didn’t respond. "But I’m not going; I won’t meet him or go to his place when he comes to London. When are they coming, Harry?"

"He is in town now."

"He's in town now."

"What a nice husband, is he not? And when does Hermione come?"

"What a great husband, right? And when is Hermione coming?"

"I do not know; she did not say. Little Hughy is ill, and that may keep her."

"I don't know; she didn't say. Little Hughy is sick, and that might be why she's not here."

"After all, Harry, I may have to pack up and go to Clavering even yet,—that is, if the mistress of the house will have me."

"After all, Harry, I might have to pack up and head to Clavering after all,—that is, if the lady of the house wants me."

"Never in the way you mean, Lady Ongar. Do not propose to kill all my relations in order that I might have their property. Archie intends to marry, and have a dozen children."

"Not in the way you think, Lady Ongar. Don’t suggest that I should eliminate all my relatives just to inherit their property. Archie plans to get married and have a bunch of kids."

"Archie marry! Who will have him? But such men as he are often in the way by marrying some cookmaid at last. Archie is Hugh's body-slave. Fancy being body-slave to Hugh Clavering! He has two, and poor Hermy is the other; only he prefers not to have Hermy near him, which is lucky for her. Here is some tea. Let us sit down and be comfortable, and talk no more about our horrid relations. I don't know what made me speak of them. I did not mean it."

"Archie’s getting married! Who would want him? But guys like him often end up marrying some maid in the end. Archie is Hugh's personal servant. Can you imagine being a personal servant to Hugh Clavering? He has two, and poor Hermy is the other one; the only problem is he doesn’t want Hermy around, which is a good thing for her. Here’s some tea. Let’s sit down, relax, and stop talking about our awful relatives. I don’t know why I brought them up. I didn’t mean to."

Harry sat down and took the cup from her hand, as she had bidden the servant to leave the tray upon the table.

Harry sat down and took the cup from her hand after she told the servant to leave the tray on the table.

"So you saw Count Pateroff," she said.

"So you saw Count Pateroff," she said.

"Yes, and his sister."

"Yes, and his sister too."

"So she told me. What do you think of them?" To this question Harry made no immediate answer. "You may speak out. Though I lived abroad with such as them for twelve months, I have not forgotten the sweet scent of our English hedgerows, nor the wholesomeness of English household manners. What do you think of them?"

"So she told me. What do you think of them?" Harry didn’t respond right away. "You can be honest. Even though I spent a year abroad with people like them, I still remember the sweet smell of our English hedgerows and the goodness of English home life. What do you think of them?"

"They are not sweet or wholesome," said he.

"They're not sweet or good for you," he said.

"Oh, Harry, you are so honest! Your honesty is beautiful. A spade will ever be a spade with you."

"Oh, Harry, you are so honest! Your honesty is beautiful. A spade will always be a spade with you."

He thought that she was laughing at him, and coloured.

He thought she was laughing at him, and blushed.

"You pressed me to speak," he said, "and I did but use your own words."

"You pushed me to talk," he said, "and I just used your own words."

"Yes, but you used them with such straightforward violence! Well, you shall use what words you please, and how you please, because a word of truth is so pleasant after living in a world of lies. I know you will not lie to me, Harry. You never did."

"Yes, but you used them with such blunt force! Well, go ahead and use whatever words you want, however you want, because the truth is so refreshing after being in a world of lies. I know you won’t lie to me, Harry. You never have."

He felt that now was the moment in which he should tell her of his engagement, but he let the moment pass without using it. And, indeed, it would have been hard for him to tell. In telling such a story he would have been cautioning her that it was useless for her to love him,—and this he could not bring himself to do. And he was not sure even now that she had not learned the fact from her sister. "I hope not," he said. In all that he was saying he knew that his words were tame and impotent in comparison with hers, which seemed to him to mean so much. But then his position was so unfortunate! Had it not been for Florence Burton he would have been long since at her feet; for, to give Harry Clavering his due, he could be quick enough at swearing to a passion. He was one of those men to whom love-making comes so readily that it is a pity that they should ever marry. He was ever making love to women, usually meaning no harm. He made love to Cecilia Burton over her children's beds, and that discreet matron liked it. But it was a love-making without danger. It simply signified on his part the pleasure he had in being on good terms with a pretty woman. He would have liked to have made love in the same way to Lady Ongar; but that was impossible, and in all love-making with Lady Ongar there must be danger. There was a pause after the expression of his last hopes, during which he finished his tea, and then looked at his boots.

He felt that this was the moment to tell her about his engagement, but he let it slip away without saying anything. It would have been difficult for him to share that news. By telling her, he would have been warning her that it was pointless to love him, and he just couldn’t bring himself to do that. Plus, he wasn't even sure if she hadn’t already found out from her sister. “I hope not,” he said. He knew that what he was saying was weak and ineffective compared to her words, which seemed to carry so much meaning. But his situation was just so unfortunate! If it weren’t for Florence Burton, he would have already been at her feet; to give Harry Clavering credit, he was quick to profess his passion. He was one of those men for whom flirting comes so easily that it would be a shame for them to ever marry. He was constantly flirting with women, usually without any real intentions. He flirted with Cecilia Burton over her children’s beds, and that sensible woman enjoyed it. But his flirting with her posed no real threat. It simply showed how much he enjoyed being friendly with a pretty woman. He would have liked to flirt the same way with Lady Ongar, but that was impossible; there was always danger involved in any flirting with her. After expressing his last hopes, there was a pause during which he finished his tea and then looked at his boots.

"You do not ask me what I have been doing at my country-house."

"You don’t ask me what I’ve been up to at my country house."

"And what have you been doing there?"

"And what have you been up to there?"

"Hating it."

"Not a fan."

"That is wrong."

"That's not right."

"Everything is wrong that I do; everything must be wrong. That is the nature of the curse upon me."

"Everything I do is wrong; it all has to be wrong. That's just the way this curse affects me."

"You think too much of all that now."

"You think too much about all that now."

"Ah, Harry, that is so easily said. People do not think of such things if they can help themselves. The place is full of him and his memories; full of him, though I do not as yet know whether he ever put his foot in it. Do you know, I have a plan, a scheme, which would, I think, make me happy for one half-hour. It is to give everything back to the family. Everything! money, house, and name; to call myself Julia Brabazon, and let the world call me what it pleases. Then I would walk out into the streets, and beg some one to give me my bread. Is there one in all the wide world that would give me a crust? Is there one, except yourself, Harry—one, except yourself?"

"Ah, Harry, that's so easy to say. People don’t consider such things if they can avoid it. This place is full of him and his memories; completely filled with him, even though I still don’t know if he ever stepped foot in here. You know, I have a plan, a scheme, that I think would make me happy for at least half an hour. It’s to return everything to the family. Everything! The money, the house, and the name; to call myself Julia Brabazon, and let the world call me whatever it wants. Then I would walk out onto the streets and ask someone to give me my food. Is there anyone in this whole wide world who would give me a crust? Is there anyone, except you, Harry—anyone except you?"

Poor Florence! I fear it fared badly with her cause at this moment. How was it possible that he should not regret, that he should not look back upon Stratton with something akin to sorrow? Julia had been his first love, and to her he could have been always true. I fear he thought of this now. I fear that it was a grief to him that he could not place himself close at her side, bid her do as she had planned, and then come to him, and share all his crusts. Had it been open to him to play that part, he would have played it well, and would have gloried in the thoughts of her poverty. The position would have suited him exactly. But Florence was in the way, and he could not do it. How was he to answer Lady Ongar? It was more difficult now than ever to tell her of Florence Burton.

Poor Florence! I worry that things are not going well for her right now. How could he not feel regret, not look back at Stratton with some sadness? Julia was his first love, and he could have always been faithful to her. I’m afraid he thought about that now. I fear it troubled him that he couldn’t be by her side, encourage her to follow her plans, and then come to him and share everything he had. If he had been able to take on that role, he would have done it well and would have taken pride in the thought of her struggles. That situation would have been perfect for him. But Florence was in the way, and he couldn’t make it happen. How was he supposed to respond to Lady Ongar? It was harder than ever to talk to her about Florence Burton.

His eyes were full of tears, and she accepted that as his excuse for not answering her. "I suppose they would say that I was a romantic fool. When the price has been taken one cannot cleanse oneself of the stain. With Judas, you know, it was not sufficient that he gave back the money. Life was too heavy for him, and so he went out and hanged himself."

His eyes were filled with tears, and she took that as his reason for not responding to her. "I guess people would call me a romantic fool. Once the price has been paid, you can't wash away the stain. With Judas, it wasn't enough that he returned the money. Life was too much for him, so he went out and hanged himself."

"Julia," he said, getting up from his chair, and going over to where she sat on a sofa, "Julia, it is horrid to hear you speak of yourself in that way. I will not have it. You are not such a one as the Iscariot." And as he spoke to her, he found her hand in his.

"Julia," he said, standing up from his chair and walking over to where she sat on the sofa, "Julia, it's awful to hear you talk about yourself like that. I won't allow it. You're not like Iscariot." And as he spoke to her, he found her hand in his.

"I wish you had my burden, Harry, for one half day, so that you might know its weight."

"I wish you could carry my burden, Harry, even for half a day, so you could understand how heavy it is."

"I wish I could bear it for you—for life."

"I wish I could handle it for you—for life."

"To be always alone, Harry; to have none that come to me and scold me, and love me, and sometimes make me smile! You will scold me at any rate; will you not? It is terrible to have no one near one that will speak to one with the old easiness of familiar affection. And then the pretence of it where it does not, cannot, could not, exist! Oh, that woman, Harry;—that woman who comes here and calls me Julie! And she has got me to promise too that I would call her Sophie! I know that you despise me because she comes here. Yes; I can see it. You said at once that she was not wholesome, with your dear outspoken honesty."

"To always be alone, Harry; to have no one who comes to me to scold me, love me, and sometimes make me smile! You will scold me at least; won’t you? It’s awful to have no one nearby who can talk to me in the comfortable way of familiar affection. And then there's the fake kindness where it doesn’t, can’t, and never could exist! Oh, that woman, Harry;—that woman who comes here and calls me Julie! And she made me promise that I would call her Sophie! I know you look down on me because she comes here. Yes; I can see it. You immediately said she wasn’t good for me, with your sweet, honest bluntness."

"It was your word."

"It was your promise."

"And she is not wholesome, whosever word it was. She was there, hanging about him when he was so bad, before the worst came. She read novels to him,—books that I never saw, and played écarté with him for what she called gloves. I believe in my heart she was spying me, and I let her come and go as she would, because I would not seem to be afraid of her. So it grew. And once or twice she was useful to me. A woman, Harry, wants to have a woman near her sometimes,—even though it be such an unwholesome creature as Sophie Gordeloup. You must not think too badly of me on her account."

"And she isn’t good, no matter whose words those are. She was around him when he was at his worst, before things got really bad. She would read novels to him—books I’d never seen—and played cards with him for what she called gloves. I honestly think she was spying on me, but I let her come and go as she pleased because I didn’t want to seem afraid of her. It just continued like that. A couple of times, she was useful to me. A woman, Harry, sometimes needs another woman nearby—even if it’s someone as unsavory as Sophie Gordeloup. Please don’t think too badly of me because of her."

"I will not;—I will not think badly of you at all."

"I won't; I won't think poorly of you at all."

"He is better, is he not? I know little of him or nothing, but he has a more reputable outside than she has. Indeed I liked him. He had known Lord Ongar well; and though he did not toady him nor was afraid of him, yet he was gentle and considerate. Once to me he said words that I was called on to resent;—but he never repeated them, and I know that he was prompted by him who should have protected me. It is too bad, Harry, is it not? Too bad almost to be believed by such as you."

"He's doing better, isn't he? I don't know much about him, but he seems to have a better reputation than she does. I actually liked him. He knew Lord Ongar well, and even though he didn't suck up to him or seem scared of him, he was kind and thoughtful. Once, he said something to me that I felt I should be upset about, but he never brought it up again, and I know he was influenced by the person who should have had my back. It's really unfortunate, Harry, don't you think? Almost too hard to believe for someone like you."

"It is very bad," said Harry.

"It's really bad," Harry said.

"After that he was always courteous; and when the end came and things were very terrible, he behaved well and kindly. He went in and out quietly, and like an old friend. He paid for everything, and was useful. I know that even this made people talk;—yes, Harry, even at such a moment as that! But in spite of the talking I did better with him then than I could have done without him."

"After that, he was always polite; and when the end came and everything was really intense, he acted well and kindly. He came and went quietly, like an old friend. He covered the costs for everything and was helpful. I know that even this made people gossip;—yes, Harry, even at a time like that! But despite the gossip, I managed better with him than I would have without him."

"He looks like a man who could be kind if he chooses."

"He seems like a guy who could be nice if he wants to."

"He is one of those, Harry, who find it easy to be good-natured, and who are soft by nature, as cats are,—not from their heart, but through instinctive propensity to softness. When it suits them, they scratch, even though they have been ever so soft before. Count Pateroff is a cat. You, Harry, I think are a dog." She perhaps expected that he would promise to her that he would be her dog,—a dog in constancy and affection; but he was still mindful in part of Florence, and restrained himself.

"He’s one of those people, Harry, who find it easy to be cheerful and are naturally gentle, like cats—not out of love, but due to their instinctive tendency toward softness. When it suits them, they can scratch, even if they’ve been soft before. Count Pateroff is like a cat. You, Harry, I think, are more like a dog." She might have expected him to promise her that he would be her dog—a loyal companion in love and devotion; but he still had some feelings for Florence and held himself back.

"I must tell you something further," she said. "And indeed it is this that I particularly want to tell you. I have not seen him, you know, since I parted with him at Florence."

"I have to tell you something else," she said. "And this is exactly what I want to share with you. I haven't seen him, you know, since I said goodbye to him in Florence."

"I did not know," said Harry.

"I didn't know," Harry said.

"I thought I had told you. However, so it is. And now, listen:—He came down to Ongar Park the other day while I was there, and sent in his card. When I refused to receive him, he wrote to me pressing his visit. I still declined, and he wrote again. I burned his note, because I did not choose that anything from him should be in my possession. He told some story about papers of Lord Ongar. I have nothing to do with Lord Ongar's papers. Everything of which I knew was sealed up in the count's presence and in mine, and was sent to the lawyers for the executors. I looked at nothing; not at one word in a single letter. What could he have to say to me of Lord Ongar's papers?"

"I thought I had already told you. But here we are. Now, listen: He came down to Ongar Park the other day while I was there and sent in his card. When I refused to see him, he wrote to me insisting on his visit. I still said no, and he wrote again. I burned his note because I didn't want anything from him in my possession. He mentioned something about Lord Ongar's papers. I have nothing to do with Lord Ongar's papers. Everything I knew was sealed in front of the count and me and sent to the lawyers for the executors. I didn’t look at anything; not a word in any letter. What could he possibly want to say to me about Lord Ongar's papers?"

"Or he might have written?"

"Or could he have written?"

"At any rate he should not have come there, Harry. I would not see him, nor, if I can help it, will I see him here. I will be open with you, Harry. I think that perhaps it might suit him to make me his wife. Such an arrangement, however, would not suit me. I am not going to be frightened into marrying a man, because he has been falsely called my lover. If I cannot escape the calumny in any other way, I will not escape it in that way."

"Anyway, he shouldn't have come here, Harry. I don’t want to see him, and if I can avoid it, I won’t see him here. I’ll be honest with you, Harry. I think he might see me as a good match for his wife. But that kind of arrangement doesn’t work for me. I'm not going to feel pressured into marrying a guy just because he’s been wrongly called my lover. If I can't clear my name in any other way, I definitely won’t do it by getting married."

"Has he said anything?"

"Has he mentioned anything?"

"No; not a word. I have not seen him since the day after Lord Ongar's funeral. But I have seen his sister."

"No, not a word. I haven't seen him since the day after Lord Ongar's funeral. But I have seen his sister."

"And has she proposed such a thing?"

"And has she suggested something like that?"

"No, she has not proposed it. But she talks of it, saying that it would not do. Then, when I tell her that of course it would not do, she shows me all that would make it expedient. She is so sly and so false, that with all my eyes open I cannot quite understand her, or quite know what she is doing. I do not feel sure that she wishes it herself."

"No, she hasn't suggested it. But she talks about it, saying that it wouldn't work. Then, when I tell her that, of course, it wouldn't work, she shows me everything that would make it seem reasonable. She's so cunning and so deceptive that even with my eyes wide open, I can't fully grasp what she's thinking or what she's up to. I don't feel confident that she genuinely wants it herself."

"She told me that it would not do."

"She told me that it wouldn't work."

"She did, did she? If she speaks of it again, tell her that she is right, that it will never do. Had he not come down to Ongar Park, I should not have mentioned this to you. I should not have thought that he had in truth any such scheme in his head. He did not tell you that he had been there?"

"She really did, huh? If she brings it up again, let her know she's right; it won't work out. If he hadn't come down to Ongar Park, I wouldn't have brought this up with you. I wouldn't have believed he actually had any plans like that. He didn't mention to you that he had been there?"

"He did not mention it. Indeed, he said very little about you at all."

"He didn't mention it. In fact, he said almost nothing about you at all."

"No, he would not. He is cautious. He never talks of anybody to anybody. He speaks only of the outward things of the world. Now, Harry, what you must do for me is this." As she was speaking to him she was leaning again upon the table, with her forehead resting upon her hands. Her small widow's cap had become thus thrust back, and was now nearly off her head, so that her rich brown hair was to be seen in its full luxuriance, rich and lovely as it had ever been. Could it be that she felt,—half thought, half felt, without knowing that she thought it,—that while the signs of her widowhood were about her, telling in their too plain language the tale of what she had been, he could not dare to speak to her of his love? She was indeed a widow, but not as are other widows. She had confessed, did hourly confess to herself, the guilt which she had committed in marrying that man; but the very fact of such confessions, of such acknowledgment, absolved her from the necessity of any show of sorrow. When she declared how she had despised and hated her late lord, she threw off mentally all her weeds. Mourning, the appearance even of mourning, became impossible to her, and the cap upon her head was declared openly to be a sacrifice to the world's requirements. It was now pushed back, but I fancy that nothing like a thought on the matter had made itself plain to her mind. "What you must do for me is this," she continued. "You must see Count Pateroff again, and tell him from me,—as my friend,—that I cannot consent to see him. Tell him that if he will think of it, he must know the reason why."

"No, he wouldn't. He's cautious. He never talks about anyone to anyone. He only discusses the surface things in life. Now, Harry, what I need you to do for me is this." As she spoke to him, she leaned back on the table, resting her forehead on her hands. Her small widow's cap had slipped back and was almost off her head, revealing her rich brown hair in all its glory, as beautiful as ever. Could it be that she intuitively felt—half thought, half sensed—without fully realizing it—that while her widow's signs were visible, clearly telling the story of her past, he wouldn't be able to express his love for her? She was indeed a widow, but not like other widows. She had admitted, and continued to admit to herself, the mistake she made by marrying that man; yet, the mere act of such confessions freed her from needing to show any grief. When she declared how she had despised and hated her late husband, she mentally shed all her mourning attire. Grieving, even the look of grieving, became impossible for her, and the cap on her head was openly acknowledged as a concession to societal expectations. It was now pushed back, but I doubt she had consciously thought about it. "What I need you to do for me is this," she continued. "You must see Count Pateroff again and tell him from me—as my friend—that I cannot agree to see him. Let him know that he must understand the reason why."

"Of course he will know."

"He'll definitely know."

"Tell him what I say, all the same; and tell him that as I have hitherto had cause to be grateful to him for his kindness, so also I hope he will not put an end to that feeling by anything now, that would not be kind. If there be papers of Lord Ongar's, he can take them either to my lawyers, if that be fit, or to those of the family. You can tell him that, can you not?"

"Make sure to tell him what I said, anyway; and let him know that while I've always appreciated his kindness, I hope he won't do anything now that would end that feeling. If there are any papers belonging to Lord Ongar, he can either take them to my lawyers, if that makes sense, or to the family’s lawyers. You can say that to him, right?"

"Oh, yes; I can tell him."

"Oh, yes; I can tell him."

"And have you any objection?"

"Do you have any objections?"

"None for myself. The question is,—would it not come better from some one else?"

"Not for me. The question is, wouldn’t it be better if it came from someone else?"

"Because you are a young man, you mean? Whom else can I trust, Harry? To whom can I go? Would you have me ask Hugh to do this? Or, perhaps you think Archie Clavering would be a proper messenger. Who else have I got?"

"Is it just because you're young, Harry? Who else can I trust? Where else can I turn? Should I ask Hugh to do this? Or do you think Archie Clavering would be a good messenger? Who else do I have?"

"Would not his sister be better?"

"Wouldn't his sister be a better choice?"

"How should I know that she had told him? She would tell him her own story,—what she herself wished. And whatever story she told, he would not believe it. They know each other better than you and I know them. It must be you, Harry, if you will do it."

"How would I know that she told him? She would share her own story—whatever she wanted to share. And no matter what story she tells, he won’t believe it. They understand each other better than you and I understand them. It must be you, Harry, if you’re willing to do it."

"Of course I will do it. I will try and see him to-morrow. Where does he live?"

"Of course I'll do it. I'll try to see him tomorrow. Where does he live?"

"How should I know? Perhaps nobody knows; no one, perhaps, of all those with whom he associates constantly. They do not live after our fashion, do they, these foreigners? But you will find him at his club, or hear of him at the house in Mount Street. You will do it; eh, Harry?"

"How should I know? Maybe nobody knows; perhaps none of the people he hangs out with regularly do. They don’t live like we do, do they, these foreigners? But you can find him at his club or hear about him at the place on Mount Street. You’ll figure it out; right, Harry?"

"I will."

"I'll."

"That is my good Harry. But I suppose you would do anything I asked you. Ah, well; it is good to have one friend, if one has no more. Look, Harry! if it is not near eleven o'clock! Did you know that you had been here nearly three hours? And I have given you nothing but a cup of tea!"

"That’s my good Harry. But I guess you would do anything I asked you to. Ah, well; it’s nice to have one friend if you don’t have more. Look, Harry! Is it nearly eleven o'clock? Did you know you’ve been here for almost three hours? And I’ve only given you a cup of tea!"

"What else do you think I have wanted?"

"What else do you think I've wanted?"

"At your club you would have had cigars and brandy-and-water, and billiards, and broiled bones, and oysters, and tankards of beer. I know all about it. You have been very patient with me. If you go quick perhaps you will not be too late for the tankards and the oysters."

"At your club, you would have enjoyed cigars and brandy-and-water, as well as billiards, grilled bones, oysters, and pints of beer. I know all about it. You've been really patient with me. If you hurry, you might not be too late for the pints and oysters."

"I never have any tankards or any oysters."

"I never have any mugs or any oysters."

"Then it is cigars and brandy-and-water. Go quick, and perhaps you may not be too late."

"Then it's cigars and brandy with water. Hurry up, and you might not be too late."

"I will go, but not there. One cannot change one's thoughts so suddenly."

"I'll go, but not to that place. You can't change your thoughts that quickly."

"Go, then; and do not change your thoughts. Go and think of me, and pity me. Pity me for what I have got, but pity me most for what I have lost." Harry did not say another word, but took her hand, and kissed it, and then left her.

"Go ahead; and don’t change your mind. Go and think of me, and feel sorry for me. Feel sorry for what I have, but feel sorriest for what I have lost." Harry didn’t say anything else, but took her hand, kissed it, and then left her.

Pity her for what she had lost! What had she lost? What did she mean by that? He knew well what she meant by pitying her for what she had got. What had she lost? She had lost him. Did she intend to evoke his pity for that loss? She had lost him. Yes, indeed. Whether or no the loss was one to regret, he would not say to himself; or rather, he, of course, declared that it was not; but such as it was, it had been incurred. He was now the property of Florence Burton, and, whatever happened, he would be true to her.

Pity her for what she had lost! What had she lost? What did she mean by that? He understood exactly what she meant by asking for pity for what she had gained. What had she lost? She had lost him. Did she want to make him feel sorry for that loss? She had lost him. Yes, definitely. Whether the loss was something to regret, he wouldn’t admit to himself; or rather, he insisted it wasn’t; but whatever it was, it had happened. He was now committed to Florence Burton, and no matter what happened, he would remain loyal to her.

Perhaps he pitied himself also. If so, it is to be hoped that Florence may never know of such pity. Before he went to bed, when he was praying on his knees, he inserted it in his prayers that the God in whom he believed might make him true in his faith to Florence Burton.

Perhaps he felt sorry for himself too. If that's the case, let's hope that Florence never finds out about it. Before he went to bed, while he was praying on his knees, he included in his prayers that the God he believed in would help him stay true in his faith to Florence Burton.

 

 

CHAPTER XVI.

THE RIVALS.

Lady Ongar sat alone, long into the night, when Harry Clavering had left her. She sat there long, getting up occasionally from her seat, once or twice attempting to write at her desk, looking now and then at a paper or two, and then at a small picture which she had, but passing the long hours in thinking,—in long, sad, solitary thoughts. What should she do with herself,—with herself, her title, and her money? Would it be still well that she should do something, that she should make some attempt; or should she, in truth, abandon all, as the arch-traitor did, and acknowledge that for her foot there could no longer be a resting-place on the earth? At six-and-twenty, with youth, beauty, and wealth at her command, must she despair? But her youth had been stained, her beauty had lost its freshness; and as for her wealth, had she not stolen it? Did not the weight of the theft sit so heavy on her, that her brightest thought was one which prompted her to abandon it?

LLady Ongar sat alone, deep into the night after Harry Clavering had left her. She lingered there for a long time, getting up occasionally from her seat, trying to write at her desk a couple of times, glancing at some papers and then at a small picture she had, but ultimately spending the long hours lost in thought— long, sad, solitary thoughts. What should she do with herself— with her title and her money? Should she try to do something, make an effort; or should she truly give up everything, like the ultimate traitor, and accept that there was no longer a place for her on this earth? At twenty-six, with youth, beauty, and wealth at her disposal, was despair her only option? But her youth had been tainted, her beauty had lost its sparkle; and as for her wealth, hadn’t she taken it? Didn't the burden of that theft weigh so heavily on her that her brightest thought was the one urging her to relinquish it?

As to that idea of giving up her income and her house, and calling herself again Julia Brabazon, though there was something in the poetry of it which would now and again for half an hour relieve her, yet she hardly proposed such a course to herself as a reality. The world in which she had lived had taught her to laugh at romance, to laugh at it even while she liked its beauty; and she would tell herself that for such a one as her to do such a thing as this, would be to insure for herself the ridicule of all who knew her name. What would Sir Hugh say, and her sister? What Count Pateroff and the faithful Sophie? What all the Ongar tribe, who would reap the rich harvest of her insanity? These latter would offer to provide her a place in some convenient asylum, and the others would all agree that such would be her fitting destiny. She could bear the idea of walking forth, as she had said, penniless into the street, without a crust; but she could not bear the idea of being laughed at when she got there.

As for the idea of giving up her income and her house, and calling herself Julia Brabazon again, even though there was something poetic about it that would occasionally lift her spirits for half an hour, she never seriously considered it as a real option. The world she had lived in had taught her to scoff at romance, even while appreciating its beauty; she would remind herself that for someone like her to do such a thing would only invite ridicule from everyone who knew her. What would Sir Hugh say? And her sister? What about Count Pateroff and devoted Sophie? What would the Ongar family say, eagerly discussing the fallout of her insanity? They would likely suggest putting her in some convenient asylum, and everyone else would agree that would be her rightful fate. She could handle the thought of stepping out, as she had mentioned, broke and empty-handed; but she couldn’t stand the idea of being laughed at when she got there.

To her, in her position, her only escape was by marriage. It was the solitude of her position which maddened her;—its solitude, or the necessity of breaking that solitude by the presence of those who were odious to her. Whether it were better to be alone, feeding on the bitterness of her own thoughts, or to be comforted by the fulsome flatteries and odious falsenesses of Sophie Gordeloup, she could not tell. She hated herself for her loneliness, but she hated herself almost worse for submitting herself to the society of Sophie Gordeloup. Why not give all that she possessed to Harry Clavering—herself, her income, her rich pastures and horses and oxen, and try whether the world would not be better to her when she had done so?

To her, in her situation, marriage was her only escape. It was the isolation of her circumstances that drove her crazy;—the loneliness, or the need to break that loneliness by being around people she found repulsive. She couldn’t decide whether it was better to be alone, trapped in her bitter thoughts, or to endure the excessive flattery and repugnant insincerity of Sophie Gordeloup. She hated herself for being lonely, but she hated herself even more for putting up with Sophie Gordeloup’s company. Why not give everything she had to Harry Clavering—herself, her income, her lush pastures, horses, and oxen—and see if the world would treat her better afterward?

She had learned to laugh at romance, but still she believed in love. While that bargain was going on as to her settlement, she had laughed at romance, and had told herself that in this world worldly prosperity was everything. Sir Hugh then had stood by her with truth, for he had well understood the matter, and could enter into it with zest. Lord Ongar, in his state of health, had not been in a position to make close stipulations as to the dower in the event of his proposed wife becoming a widow. "No, no; we won't stand that," Sir Hugh had said to the lawyers. "We all hope, of course, that Lord Ongar may live long; no doubt he'll turn over a new leaf, and die at ninety. But in such a case as this the widow must not be fettered." The widow had not been fettered, and Julia had been made to understand the full advantage of such an arrangement. But still she had believed in love when she had bade farewell to Harry in the garden. She had told herself then, even then, that she would have better liked to have taken him and his love,—if only she could have afforded it. He had not dreamed that on leaving him she had gone from him to her room, and taken out his picture,—the same that she had with her now in Bolton Street,—and had kissed it, bidding him farewell there with a passion which she could not display in his presence. And she had thought of his offer about the money over and over again. "Yes," she would say; "that man loved me. He would have given me all he had to relieve me, though nothing was to come to him in return." She had, at any rate, been loved once; and she almost wished that she had taken the money, that she might now have an opportunity of repaying it.

She had learned to laugh at romance, but she still believed in love. While the negotiations about her settlement were happening, she laughed at romance and convinced herself that worldly success was everything. Sir Hugh had stood by her with honesty, fully understanding the situation and engaging in it enthusiastically. Lord Ongar, given his health, wasn't in a position to make detailed stipulations about the dowry in case his intended wife became a widow. "No, no; we won’t allow that," Sir Hugh told the lawyers. "We all hope, of course, that Lord Ongar will live a long time; no doubt he’ll change his ways and die at ninety. But in a situation like this, the widow must not be restricted." The widow was not restricted, and Julia was made to understand the full benefit of that arrangement. Yet, she believed in love when she said goodbye to Harry in the garden. She told herself then, even in that moment, that she would have preferred to take him and his love—if only she could have afforded it. He had no idea that after leaving him, she had gone to her room, taken out his picture—the same one she had with her now in Bolton Street—and kissed it, bidding him farewell there with a passion she couldn't show in front of him. And she thought about his offer of money again and again. "Yes," she would say; "that man loved me. He would have given me everything he had to help me, even though he expected nothing in return." At least she had been loved once, and she almost wished she had accepted the money so she could now have the chance to repay it.

And she was again free, and her old lover was again by her side. Had that fatal episode in her life been so fatal that she must now regard herself as tainted and unfit for him? There was no longer anything to separate them,—anything of which she was aware, unless it was that. And as for his love,—did he not look and speak as though he loved her still? Had he not pressed her hand passionately, and kissed it, and once more called her Julia? How should it be that he should not love her? In such a case as his, love might have been turned to hatred or to enmity; but it was not so with him. He called himself her friend. How could there be friendship between them without love?

And she was free again, and her old lover was back by her side. Had that devastating moment in her life been so terrible that she had to see herself as damaged and unworthy of him? There was nothing left to keep them apart—nothing that she was aware of, except maybe that. And as for his love—didn’t he look and act like he still loved her? Hadn’t he passionately squeezed her hand, kissed it, and called her Julia once more? How could it be that he didn’t love her? In his situation, love could have turned into hatred or hostility, but that wasn’t the case with him. He called himself her friend. How could there be friendship between them without love?

And then she thought how much with her wealth she might do for him. With all his early studies and his talent Harry Clavering was not the man, she thought, to make his way in the world by hard work; but with such an income as she could give him, he might shine among the proud ones of his nation. He should go into Parliament, and do great things. He should be lord of all. It should all be his without a word of reserve. She had been mercenary once, but she would atone for that now by open-handed, undoubting generosity. She herself had learned to hate the house and fields and widespread comforts of Ongar Park. She had walked among it all alone, and despised. But it would be a glory to her to see him go forth, with Giles at his heels, boldly giving his orders, changing this and improving that. He would be rebuked for no errors, let him do with Enoch Gubby and the rest of them what he pleased! And then the parson's wife would be glad enough to come to her, and the house would be full of smiling faces. And it might be that God would be good to her, and that she would have treasures, as other women had them, and that the flavour would come back to the apples, and that the ashes would cease to grate between her teeth.

And then she thought about all the good she could do for him with her wealth. With all his early studies and talent, Harry Clavering wasn’t the type to succeed through hard work, but with the income she could provide, he could stand out among the elite of his nation. He should enter Parliament and accomplish great things. He should be in charge of everything. It should all belong to him without any reservations. She had been selfish before, but she would make up for it now with genuine, generous giving. She had come to loathe the house, the fields, and the lavish comforts of Ongar Park. She had wandered through it all alone and felt nothing but disdain. But it would be a joy for her to see him step out, with Giles following him, giving orders confidently, making changes, and improvements. He wouldn’t be criticized for any mistakes; he could do whatever he wanted with Enoch Gubby and the others! And then the parson's wife would be eager to come visit her, and their home would be filled with smiling faces. Maybe God would be kind to her, and she would have treasures like other women did, the taste would return to the apples, and the grit wouldn’t bother her anymore.

She loved him, and why should it not be so? She could go before God's altar with him without disgracing herself with a lie. She could put her hand in his, and swear honestly that she would worship him and obey him. She had been dishonest;—but if he would pardon her for that, could she not reward him richly for such pardon? And it seemed to her that he had pardoned her. He had forgiven it all and was gracious to her,—coming at her beck and call, and sitting with her as though he liked her presence. She was woman enough to understand this, and she knew that he liked it. Of course he loved her. How could it be otherwise?

She loved him, and why shouldn’t she? She could stand before God with him without feeling ashamed or dishonest. She could take his hand and genuinely swear that she would cherish and follow him. She had been deceitful; but if he could forgive her for that, couldn’t she reward him greatly for his forgiveness? It felt to her like he had forgiven her. He had let it all go and was kind to her—coming whenever she called and sitting with her like he enjoyed her company. She was wise enough to see this, and she knew that he did. Of course he loved her. How could it be any other way?

But yet he spoke nothing to her of his love. In the old days there had been with him no bashfulness of that kind. He was not a man to tremble and doubt before a woman. In those old days he had been ready enough,—so ready, that she had wondered that one who had just come from his books should know so well how to make himself master of a girl's heart. Nature had given him that art, as she does give it to some, withholding it from many. But now he sat near her, dropping once and again half words of love, hearing her references to the old times;—and yet he said nothing.

But he still said nothing to her about his love. Back in the day, he wasn’t shy like that. He wasn’t the type to hesitate or doubt in front of a woman. Back then, he had been more than willing—so willing that she had been amazed that someone who had just come from his books would know how to win a girl's heart so well. Nature had given him that skill, like she does to some, while keeping it from many. But now he sat next to her, occasionally dropping hints of love, listening to her talk about the old times; yet he said nothing.

But how was he to speak of love to one who was a widow but of four months' standing? And with what face could he now again ask for her hand, knowing that it had been filled so full since last it was refused to him? It was thus she argued to herself when she excused him in that he did not speak to her. As to her widowhood, to herself it was a thing of scorn. Thinking of it, she cast her weepers from her, and walked about the room, scorning the hypocrisy of her dress. It needed that she should submit herself to this hypocrisy before the world; but he might know,—for had she not told him?—that the clothes she wore were no index of her feeling or of her heart. She had been mean enough, base enough, vile enough, to sell herself to that wretched lord. Mean, base, and vile she had been, and she now confessed it; but she was not false enough to pretend that she mourned the man as a wife mourns. Harry might have seen enough to know, have understood enough to perceive, that he need not regard her widowhood.

But how was he supposed to talk about love to someone who had only been a widow for four months? And how could he possibly ask for her hand again, knowing it had been occupied since the last time he was turned down? This is what she told herself as she justified his silence. As for her widowhood, it was something she looked down on. Thinking about it, she threw off her mourning clothes and walked around the room, scoffing at the pretense of her outfit. She had to conform to this pretense in front of others, but he might understand—since hadn’t she told him?—that her clothes didn’t reflect her true feelings or heart. She had been low enough, despicable enough, to sell herself to that miserable lord. She acknowledged that she had been mean, base, and vile, but she wasn’t deceitful enough to pretend she mourned him like a wife would. Harry should have seen enough to realize that he didn’t need to take her widowhood seriously.

And as to her money! If that were the stumbling-block, might it not be well that the first overture should come from her? Could she not find words to tell him that it might all be his? Could she not say to him, "Harry Clavering, all this is nothing in my hands. Take it into your hands, and it will prosper." Then it was that she went to her desk, and attempted to write to him. She did write to him a completed note, offering herself and all that was hers for his acceptance. In doing so, she strove hard to be honest and yet not over bold; to be affectionate and yet not unfeminine. Long she sat, holding her head with one hand, while the other attempted to use the pen which would not move over the paper. At length, quickly it flew across the sheet, and a few lines were there for her to peruse.

And about her money! If that was the issue, wouldn’t it be better for her to make the first move? Could she find the right words to tell him that it could all belong to him? Could she say to him, "Harry Clavering, this is nothing in my hands. Take it in your hands, and it will thrive." Then she went to her desk and tried to write to him. She did manage to write a whole note, offering herself and everything she had for him to accept. In doing this, she worked hard to be honest but not too forward; to be caring yet still feminine. She sat there for a long time, holding her head with one hand while the other tried to write with the pen that refused to move over the paper. Finally, it quickly flew across the page, and there were a few lines for her to read.

"Harry Clavering," she had written,
 

"Harry Clavering," she had texted,

I know I am doing what men and women say no woman should do. You may, perhaps, say so of me now; but if you do, I know you so well, that I do not fear that others will be able to repeat it. Harry, I have never loved any one but you. Will you be my husband? You well know that I should not make you this offer if I did not intend that everything I have should be yours. It will be pleasant to me to feel that I can make some reparation for the evil I have done. As for love, I have never loved any one but you. You yourself must know that well. Yours, altogether if you will have it so,—Julia.
 

I know I'm doing something that everyone says a woman shouldn't do. You might think that about me now, but I know you well enough not to worry that others will say the same. Harry, I've never loved anyone but you. Will you marry me? You know I wouldn't make this offer if I didn't plan for everything I have to be yours. It will be nice for me to feel like I can make up for the pain I've caused. As for love, I've never loved anyone but you. You must know that too. Yours completely, if you want it that way,—Julia.

She took the letter with her, back across the room to her seat by the fire, and took with her at the same time the little portrait; and there she sat, looking at the one and reading the other. At last she slowly folded the note up into a thin wisp of paper, and, lighting the end of it, watched it till every shred of it was burnt to an ash. "If he wants me," she said, "he can come and take me,—as other men do." It was a fearful attempt, that which she had thought of making. How could she have looked him in the face again had his answer to her been a refusal?

She brought the letter back to her seat by the fire, along with the small portrait, and there she sat, glancing at one while reading the other. Finally, she slowly folded the note into a thin strip of paper, lit one end, and watched it until every bit turned to ash. "If he wants me," she said, "he can come and get me—like other men do." It was a terrifying thought that she had considered. How could she have faced him again if his response had been a no?

Another hour went by before she took herself to her bed, during which her cruelly-used maiden was waiting for her half asleep in the chamber above; and during that time she tried to bring herself to some steady resolve. She would remain in London for the coming months, so that he might come to her if he pleased. She would remain there, even though she were subject to the daily attacks of Sophie Gordeloup. She hardly knew why, but in part she was afraid of Sophie. She had done nothing of which Sophie knew the secret. She had no cause to tremble because Sophie might be offended. The woman had seen her in some of her saddest moments, and could indeed tell of indignities which would have killed some women. But these she had borne, and had not disgraced herself in the bearing of them. But still she was afraid of Sophie, and felt that she could not bring herself absolutely to dismiss her friend from her house. Nevertheless, she would remain;—because Harry Clavering was in London and could come to her there. To her house at Ongar Park she would never go again, unless she went as his wife. The place had become odious to her. Bad as was her solitude in London, with Sophie Gordeloup to break it,—and perhaps with Sophie's brother to attack her, it was not so bad as the silent desolation of Ongar Park. Never again would she go there, unless she went there, in triumph,—as Harry's wife. Having so far resolved she took herself at last to her room, and dismissed her drowsy Phœbe to her rest.

Another hour passed before she headed to her bed, during which her mistreated maid waited for her half-asleep in the room above; during that time, she tried to gather her thoughts and make up her mind. She would stay in London for the coming months so that he could visit her if he wanted. She would stick it out, even though she would face daily attacks from Sophie Gordeloup. She wasn’t sure why, but part of her was afraid of Sophie. She hadn't done anything that Sophie knew about. There was no reason for her to be nervous about potentially upsetting Sophie. The woman had seen her at some of her lowest points and could certainly talk about humiliations that would have crushed some women. Yet, she had endured them and hadn’t embarrassed herself in the process. Still, she felt uneasy around Sophie and realized she couldn't fully push her friend out of her life. Still, she would remain; because Harry Clavering was in London and could come to her there. She would never return to her house at Ongar Park unless she went back as his wife. The place had become unbearable for her. As difficult as her solitude in London was, with Sophie Gordeloup to break it—and maybe with Sophie’s brother to confront her—it wasn’t nearly as bad as the empty loneliness of Ongar Park. She wouldn’t go back there again unless it was in victory—as Harry’s wife. Having made this decision, she finally went to her room and let her sleepy Phœbe rest.

And now the reader must be asked to travel down at once into the country, that he may see how Florence Burton passed the same evening at Clavering Rectory. It was Florence's last night there, and on the following morning she was to return to her father's house at Stratton. Florence had not as yet received her unsatisfactory letter from Harry. That was to arrive on the following morning. At present she was, as regarded her letters, under the influence of that one which had been satisfactory in so especial a degree. Not that the coming letter,—the one now on its route,—was of a nature to disturb her comfort permanently, or to make her in any degree unhappy. "Dear fellow; he must be careful, he is overworking himself." Even the unsatisfactory letter would produce nothing worse than this from her; but now, at the moment of which I am writing, she was in a paradise of happy thoughts.

And now the reader is invited to head down to the countryside to see how Florence Burton spent the same evening at Clavering Rectory. It was Florence's last night there, and she was set to go back to her father's house in Stratton the next morning. At that time, she hadn't yet received her disappointing letter from Harry. That would arrive the following morning. For now, she was still under the influence of the letter that had brought her so much joy. The letter on its way wouldn't disturb her happiness permanently or make her feel upset. "That dear guy; he needs to be careful; he's working himself too hard." Even the disappointing letter would only elicit this kind of response from her; but at the moment I'm describing, she was in a blissful state of happy thoughts.

Her visit to Clavering had been in every respect successful. She had been liked by every one, and every one in return had been liked by her. Mrs. Clavering had treated her as though she were a daughter. The rector had made her pretty presents, had kissed her, and called her his child. With Fanny she had formed a friendship which was to endure for ever, let destiny separate them how it might. Dear Fanny! She had had a wonderful interview respecting Fanny on this very day, and was at this moment disquieting her mind because she could not tell her friend what had happened without a breach of confidence! She had learned a great deal at Clavering, though in most matters of learning she was a better instructed woman than they were whom she had met. In general knowledge and in intellect she was Fanny's superior, though Fanny Clavering was no fool; but Florence, when she came thither, had lacked something which living in such a house had given to her;—or, I should rather say, something had been given to her of which she would greatly feel the want, if it could be again taken from her. Her mother was as excellent a woman as had ever sent forth a family of daughters into the world, and I do not know that any one ever objected to her as being ignorant, or specially vulgar; but the house in Stratton was not like Clavering Rectory in the little ways of living, and this Florence Burton had been clever enough to understand. She knew that a sojourn under such a roof, with such a woman as Mrs. Clavering, must make her fitter to be Harry's wife; and, therefore, when they pressed her to come again in the autumn, she said that she thought she would. She could understand, too, that Harry was different in many things from the men who had married her sisters, and she rejoiced that it was so. Poor Florence! Had he been more like them it might have been safer for her.

Her visit to Clavering had been a complete success. Everyone liked her, and she liked everyone in return. Mrs. Clavering treated her like a daughter. The rector gave her nice gifts, kissed her, and called her his child. She formed a friendship with Fanny that would last forever, no matter what fate held. Dear Fanny! She had an amazing conversation about Fanny on that very day and was currently worrying because she couldn't tell her friend what had happened without breaking a promise! She learned a lot at Clavering, even though in most areas of knowledge, she was more educated than the people she met there. Generally, she was smarter than Fanny, although Fanny Clavering was no fool; but Florence, when she arrived, lacked something that living in such a house provided her with—or rather, something she would greatly miss if taken away again. Her mother was as remarkable a woman as any who had ever sent daughters into the world, and I don't think anyone ever accused her of being ignorant or particularly rude; but the house in Stratton wasn't like Clavering Rectory in the little details of daily life, and Florence Burton was sharp enough to notice that. She realized that living under such a roof, with a woman like Mrs. Clavering, would make her more suitable to be Harry's wife; thus, when they invited her to return in the fall, she said she thought she would. She could also see that Harry was different in many ways from the men who married her sisters, and she was glad about that. Poor Florence! If he had been more like them, it might have been safer for her.

But we must return for a moment to the wonderful interview which has been mentioned. Florence, during her sojourn at Clavering, had become intimate with Mr. Saul, as well as with Fanny. She had given herself for the time heartily to the schools, and matters had so far progressed with her that Mr. Saul had on one occasion scolded her soundly. "It's a great sign that he thinks well of you," Fanny had said. "It was the only sign he ever gave me, before he spoke to me in that sad strain." On the afternoon of this, her last day at Clavering, she had gone over to Cumberly Green with Fanny, to say farewell to the children, and walked back by herself, as Fanny had not finished her work. When she was still about half a mile from the rectory, she met Mr. Saul, who was on his way out to the Green. "I knew I should meet you," he said, "so that I might say good-by."

But we need to go back for a moment to the amazing interview that was talked about. While Florence was staying at Clavering, she had become close with Mr. Saul, as well as with Fanny. She had fully committed herself to the schools during her time there, and things had progressed to the point where Mr. Saul had scolded her quite sternly on one occasion. "It's a great sign that he thinks highly of you," Fanny had remarked. "It was the only sign he ever showed me before he spoke to me in such a sad way." On the afternoon of her last day at Clavering, she had gone to Cumberly Green with Fanny to say goodbye to the children and walked back by herself, since Fanny hadn’t finished her work. When she was about half a mile from the rectory, she ran into Mr. Saul, who was on his way to the Green. "I knew I would run into you," he said, "so that I could say goodbye."

"Yes, indeed, Mr. Saul,—for I am going in truth, to-morrow."

"Yes, Mr. Saul, I really am going tomorrow."

"I wish you were staying. I wish you were going to remain with us. Having you here is very pleasant, and you do more good here, perhaps, than you will elsewhere."

"I wish you were staying. I wish you were going to stick with us. Having you here is really nice, and you probably do more good here than you would anywhere else."

"I will not allow that. You forget that I have a father and mother."

"I won't let that happen. You seem to forget that I have parents."

"Yes; and you will have a husband soon."

"Yes, and you'll have a husband soon."

"No, not soon; some day, perhaps, if all goes well. But I mean to be back here often before that. I mean to be here in October, just for a little visit, if mamma can spare me."

"No, not anytime soon; maybe someday, if everything goes well. But I plan to be back here often before that. I want to be here in October, just for a short visit, if mom can let me."

"Miss Burton," he said, speaking in a very serious tone—. All his tones were serious, but that which he now adopted was more solemn than usual. "I wish to consult you on a certain matter, if you can give me five minutes of your time."

"Miss Burton," he said, speaking in a very serious tone. All his tones were serious, but the one he used now was more solemn than usual. "I’d like to discuss something with you, if you can spare me five minutes."

"To consult me, Mr. Saul?"

"To consult me, Mr. Saul?"

"Yes, Miss Burton. I am hard pressed at present, and I know no one else of whom I can ask a certain question, if I cannot ask it of you. I think that you will answer me truly, if you answer me at all. I do not think you would flatter me, or tell me an untruth."

"Yes, Miss Burton. I'm feeling really pressured right now, and I don't know anyone else I can ask a specific question if I can't ask you. I believe you'll answer me honestly if you choose to respond at all. I don't think you would flatter me or lie to me."

"Flatter you! how could I flatter you?"

"Flatter you! How could I possibly flatter you?"

"By telling me—; but I must ask you my question first. You and Fanny Clavering are dear friends now. You tell each other everything."

"By telling me—but I need to ask you my question first. You and Fanny Clavering are really good friends now. You share everything with each other."

"I do not know," said Florence, doubting as to what she might best say, but guessing something of that which was coming.

"I don't know," said Florence, unsure of what she should say, but sensing something was coming.

"She will have told you, perhaps, that I asked her to be my wife. Did she ever tell you that?" Florence looked into his face for a few moments without answering him, not knowing how to answer such a question. "I know that she has told you," said he. "I can see that it is so."

"She might have mentioned that I asked her to marry me. Did she ever tell you that?" Florence stared at his face for a moment, unsure how to respond to such a question. "I know she told you," he said. "I can tell it's true."

"She has told me," said Florence.

"She told me," Florence said.

"Why should she not? How could she be with you so many hours, and not tell you that of which she could hardly fail to have the remembrance often present with her. If I were gone from here, if I were not before her eyes daily, it might be otherwise; but seeing me as she does from day to day, of course she has spoken of me to her friend."

"Why shouldn't she? How could she spend so many hours with you and not mention something that she likely often remembers? If I were gone, if I weren't in front of her every day, it might be different; but since she sees me day after day, of course she has talked about me to her friend."

"Yes, Mr. Saul; she has told me of it."

"Yes, Mr. Saul; she has told me about it."

"And now, will you tell me whether I may hope."

"And now, will you tell me if I can hope?"

"Mr. Saul!"

"Mr. Saul!"

"I want you to betray no secret, but I ask you for your advice. Can I hope that she will ever return my love?"

"I don't want you to reveal any secrets, but I need your advice. Can I hope that she will ever love me back?"

"How am I to answer you?"

"How should I respond to you?"

"With the truth. Only with the truth."

"With the truth. Only with the truth."

"I should say that she thinks that you have forgotten it."

"I should mention that she believes you have forgotten it."

"Forgotten it! No, Miss Burton; she cannot think that. Do you believe that men or women can forget such things as that? Can you ever forget her brother? Do you think people ever forget when they have loved? No, I have not forgotten her. I have not forgotten that walk which we had down this lane together. There are things which men never forget." Then he paused for an answer.

"Forget it? No, Miss Burton; she can't think that. Do you really believe that men or women can forget things like that? Can you ever forget her brother? Do you think people ever forget their love? No, I haven't forgotten her. I haven’t forgotten that walk we took down this lane together. There are things that men never forget." Then he waited for a response.

Florence was by nature steady and self-collected, and she at once felt that she was bound to be wary before she gave him any answer. She had half fancied once or twice that Fanny thought more of Mr. Saul than she allowed even herself to know. And Fanny, when she had spoken of the impossibility of such a marriage, had always based the impossibility on the fact that people should not marry without the means of living,—a reason which to Florence, with all her prudence, was not sufficient. Fanny might wait as she also intended to wait. Latterly, too, Fanny had declared more than once to Florence her conviction that Mr. Saul's passion had been a momentary insanity which had altogether passed away; and in these declarations Florence had half fancied that she discovered some tinge of regret. If it were so, what was she now to say to Mr. Saul?

Florence was naturally calm and composed, and she immediately sensed that she needed to be cautious before giving him any response. She had occasionally thought that Fanny had deeper feelings for Mr. Saul than she even allowed herself to acknowledge. And Fanny, when talking about the impossibility of such a marriage, always justified it by saying that people shouldn't marry without financial stability—a reason that, despite Florence's caution, didn't seem sufficient to her. Fanny could wait, just as she intended to. Recently, Fanny had also repeatedly expressed to Florence her belief that Mr. Saul's feelings had been a fleeting madness that had completely faded; in these statements, Florence had started to sense a hint of regret. If that was the case, what was she supposed to tell Mr. Saul now?

"You think then, Miss Burton," he continued, "that I have no chance of success? I ask the question because if I felt certain that this was so,—quite certain, I should be wrong to remain here. It has been my first and only parish, and I could not leave it without bitter sorrow. But if I were to remain here hopelessly, I should become unfit for my work. I am becoming so, and shall be better away."

"You think then, Miss Burton," he continued, "that I have no chance of success? I’m asking because if I were sure this was the case—really sure, I would be wrong to stay here. This has been my first and only parish, and I couldn’t leave it without deep sadness. But if I stay here feeling hopeless, I’ll become unfit for my work. I’m starting to feel that way, and it would be better for me to be elsewhere."

"But why ask me, Mr. Saul?"

"But why are you asking me, Mr. Saul?"

"Because I think that you can tell me."

"Because I believe you can tell me."

"But why not ask herself? Who can tell you so truly as she can do?"

"But why not ask herself? Who can tell you as truthfully as she can?"

"You would not advise me to do that if you were sure that she would reject me?"

"You wouldn't tell me to do that if you were confident she would turn me down?"

"That is what I would advise."

"That's my suggestion."

"I will take your advice, Miss Burton. Now, good-by, and may God bless you. You say you will be here in the autumn; but before the autumn I shall probably have left Clavering. If so our farewells will be for very long, but I shall always remember our pleasant intercourse here." Then he went on towards Cumberly Green; and Florence, as she walked into the vicarage grounds, was thinking that no girl had ever been loved by a more single-hearted, pure-minded gentleman than Mr. Saul.

"I'll take your advice, Miss Burton. So, goodbye, and may God bless you. You say you'll be here in the fall; but before that, I’ll probably have left Clavering. If that’s the case, our goodbyes will be for a long time, but I’ll always remember our nice conversations here." Then he continued on toward Cumberly Green, and Florence, as she walked into the vicarage grounds, was thinking that no girl had ever been loved by a more genuine, kind-hearted gentleman than Mr. Saul.

As she sat alone in her bed-room, five or six hours after this interview, she felt some regret that she should leave Clavering without a word to Fanny on the subject. Mr. Saul had exacted no promise of secrecy from her; he was not a man to exact such promises. But she felt not the less that she would be betraying confidence to speak, and it might even be that her speaking on the matter would do more harm than good. Her sympathies were doubtless with Mr. Saul, but she could not therefore say that she thought Fanny ought to accept his love. It would be best to say nothing of the matter, and to allow Mr. Saul to fight his own battle.

As she sat alone in her bedroom, five or six hours after this conversation, she felt some regret about leaving Clavering without mentioning anything to Fanny. Mr. Saul hadn’t asked her to keep it a secret; he wasn’t the type to ask for such promises. Still, she felt that speaking up would be a betrayal of trust, and it might even cause more harm than good. While she definitely sympathized with Mr. Saul, that didn’t mean she thought Fanny should accept his love. It seemed best to stay silent on the issue and let Mr. Saul handle his own situation.

Then she turned to her own matters, and there she found that everything was pleasant. How good the world had been to her to give her such a lover as Harry Clavering! She owned with all her heart the excellence of being in love, when a girl might be allowed to call such a man her own. She could not but make comparisons between him and Mr. Saul, though she knew that she was making them on points that were hardly worthy of her thoughts. Mr. Saul was plain, uncouth, with little that was bright about him except the brightness of his piety. Harry was like the morning star. He looked and walked and spoke as though he were something more godlike than common men. His very voice created joy, and the ring of his laughter was to Florence as the music of the heavens. What woman would not have loved Harry Clavering? Even Julia Brabazon,—a creature so base that she had sold herself to such a thing as Lord Ongar for money and a title, but so grand in her gait and ways, so Florence had been told, that she seemed to despise the earth on which she trod,—even she had loved him. Then as Florence thought of what Julia Brabazon might have had and of what she had lost, she wondered that there could be women born so sadly vicious.

Then she turned to her own concerns, and she found that everything was nice. How fortunate she was that the world had given her someone like Harry Clavering! She fully appreciated the joy of being in love, especially when a girl could call such a man her own. She couldn’t help but compare him to Mr. Saul, even though she knew she was doing so on points that didn’t really deserve her attention. Mr. Saul was plain and awkward, with little about him that shone except for the brightness of his faith. Harry was like the morning star. He looked, walked, and spoke as if he were something more divine than ordinary men. His very voice brought joy, and the sound of his laughter felt to Florence like the music of the heavens. What woman wouldn’t have loved Harry Clavering? Even Julia Brabazon—someone so low that she had sold herself to someone like Lord Ongar for money and a title, yet so impressive in her demeanor that she seemed to look down on the ground beneath her feet—had loved him. As Florence thought about what Julia Brabazon could have had and what she had given up, she wondered how there could be women born so wicked.

But that woman's vice had given her her success, her joy, her great triumph! It was surely not for her to deal hardly with the faults of Julia Brabazon,—for her who was enjoying all the blessings of which those faults had robbed the other! Julia Brabazon had been her very good friend.

But that woman's flaw had given her her success, her happiness, her big achievement! It wasn't really her place to judge Julia Brabazon's mistakes—especially since she was enjoying all the good things that those mistakes had denied Julia! Julia Brabazon had been her very good friend.

But why had this perfect lover come to her, to one so small, so trifling, so little in the world's account as she, and given to her all the treasure of his love? Oh, Harry,—dear Harry! what could she do for him that would be a return good enough for such great goodness? Then she took out his last letter, that satisfactory letter, that letter that had been declared to be perfect, and read it and read it again. No; she did not want Fanny or any one else to tell her that he was true. Honesty and truth were written on every line of his face, were to be heard in every tone of his voice, could be seen in every sentence that came from his hand. Dear Harry; dearest Harry! She knew well that he was true.

But why had this perfect lover come to her, to someone so small, so unimportant, so insignificant in the world's eyes as she, and given her all the treasure of his love? Oh, Harry—dear Harry! What could she do for him that would be enough to repay such incredible kindness? Then she took out his last letter, that satisfying letter, that letter everyone said was perfect, and read it and read it again. No; she didn't want Fanny or anyone else to tell her that he was honest. Honesty and truth were written on every line of his face, could be heard in every tone of his voice, and were evident in every sentence he wrote. Dear Harry; dearest Harry! She knew very well that he was true.

Then she also sat down and wrote to him, on that her last night beneath his father's roof,—wrote to him when she had nearly prepared herself for her bed; and honestly, out of her full heart, thanked him for his love. There was no need that she should be coy with him now, for she was his own. "Dear Harry, when I think of all that you have done for me in loving me and choosing me for your wife, I know that I can never pay you all that I owe you."

Then she also sat down and wrote to him on her last night under his father's roof—wrote to him just before getting ready for bed; and sincerely, from her heart, thanked him for his love. There was no need for her to be shy with him now, because she belonged to him. "Dear Harry, when I think about everything you’ve done for me by loving me and choosing me as your wife, I realize that I can never repay you for all you’ve given me."

Such were the two rival claimants for the hand of Harry Clavering.

Such were the two competing suitors for Harry Clavering's hand.

 

 

CHAPTER XVII.

"LET HER KNOW THAT YOU'RE THERE."

A week had passed since the evening which Harry had spent in Bolton Street, and he had not again seen Lady Ongar. He had professed to himself that his reason for not going there was the non-performance of the commission which Lady Ongar had given him with reference to Count Pateroff. He had not yet succeeded in catching the count, though he had twice asked for him in Mount Street and twice at the club in Pall Mall. It appeared that the count never went to Mount Street, and was very rarely seen at the club. There was some other club which he frequented, and Harry did not know what club. On both the occasions of Harry's calling in Mount Street, the servant had asked him to go up and see madame; but he had declined to do so, pleading that he was hurried. He was, however, driven to resolve that he must go direct to Sophie, as otherwise he could find no means of doing as he had promised. She probably might put him on the scent of her brother.

A week had gone by since the evening Harry spent at Bolton Street, and he hadn’t seen Lady Ongar again. He had convinced himself that the reason he wasn’t going back was because he hadn’t fulfilled the task Lady Ongar had given him regarding Count Pateroff. He hadn’t managed to catch the count yet, even though he had asked for him twice in Mount Street and twice at the club in Pall Mall. It seemed that the count never went to Mount Street and was rarely seen at the club. There was another club he frequented, but Harry didn’t know which one. On both occasions when he called at Mount Street, the servant had asked him to go up and see madame, but he had turned it down, claiming he was in a hurry. However, he felt he had to go straight to Sophie; otherwise, he wouldn’t be able to keep his promise. She might have a lead on her brother.

But there had been another reason why Harry had not gone to Bolton Street, though he had not acknowledged it to himself. He did not dare to trust himself with Lady Ongar. He feared that he would be led on to betray himself and to betray Florence,—to throw himself at Julia's feet and sacrifice his honesty, in spite of all his resolutions to the contrary. He felt when there as the accustomed but repentant dram-drinker might feel, when having resolved to abstain, he is called upon to sit with the full glass offered before his lips. From such temptation as that the repentant dram-drinker knows that he must fly. But though he did not go after the fire-water of Bolton Street, neither was he able to satisfy himself with the cool fountain of Onslow Crescent. He was wretched at this time,—ill-satisfied with himself and others, and was no fitting companion for Cecilia Burton. The world, he thought, had used him ill. He could have been true to Julia Brabazon when she was well-nigh penniless. It was not for her money that he had regarded her. Had he been now a free man,—free from those chains with which he had fettered himself at Stratton,—he would again have asked this woman for her love, in spite of her past treachery; but it would have been for her love and not for her money that he would have sought her. Was it his fault that he had loved her, that she had been false to him, and that she had now come back and thrown herself before him? Or had he been wrong because he had ventured to think that he loved another when Julia had deserted him? Or could he help himself if he now found that his love in truth belonged to her whom he had known first? The world had been very cruel to him, and he could not go to Onslow Crescent and behave there prettily, hearing the praises of Florence with all the ardour of a discreet lover.

But there was another reason why Harry hadn’t gone to Bolton Street, even if he hadn’t admitted it to himself. He didn’t trust himself around Lady Ongar. He was afraid that he would end up betraying himself and Florence—falling at Julia’s feet and sacrificing his integrity, despite all his resolutions not to. He felt like a remorseful drinker who, having decided to stay sober, is suddenly faced with a full glass offered right before his lips. From such temptation, the reformed drinker knows he must escape. But even though he didn’t go after the temptation of Bolton Street, he also couldn’t find satisfaction in the calm waters of Onslow Crescent. He was miserable at this time—dissatisfied with himself and others, and wasn’t a good companion for Cecilia Burton. He thought the world had treated him poorly. He could have been loyal to Julia Brabazon when she was nearly broke. It wasn’t her money that had attracted him to her. If he had been a free man—free from the commitments he had bound himself with at Stratton—he would have asked this woman for her love again, despite her past betrayal; but he would have sought her love, not her money. Was it his fault that he had loved her, that she had been unfaithful to him, and that she had now returned and thrown herself at him? Or was he wrong to think he loved someone else when Julia had abandoned him? Or could he help it if he now realized that his true love belonged to the woman he had known first? The world had been very unkind to him, and he couldn’t go to Onslow Crescent and act nicely while hearing Florence’s praises with all the enthusiasm of a proper lover.

He knew well what would have been his right course, and yet he did not follow it. Let him but once communicate to Lady Ongar the fact of his engagement, and the danger would be over, though much, perhaps, of the misery might remain. Let him write to her and mention the fact, bringing it up as some little immaterial accident, and she would understand what he meant. But this he abstained from doing. Though he swore to himself that he would not touch the dram, he would not dash down the full glass that was held to his lips. He went about the town very wretchedly, looking for the count, and regarding himself as a man specially marked out for sorrow by the cruel hand of misfortune. Lady Ongar, in the meantime, was expecting him, and was waxing angry and becoming bitter towards him because he came not.

He knew exactly what the right thing to do was, but he didn't act on it. If he just told Lady Ongar about his engagement, the danger would be gone, though a lot of the sadness might still linger. If he wrote to her and casually mentioned it, she would get the message. But he avoided doing that. Even though he promised himself he wouldn't drink, he didn't push away the full glass that was offered to him. He wandered around the town feeling miserable, searching for the count, and seeing himself as someone uniquely doomed by fate's cruel hand. Meanwhile, Lady Ongar was waiting for him and growing increasingly angry and resentful because he hadn't shown up.

Sir Hugh Clavering was now up in London, and with him was his brother Archie. Sir Hugh was a man who strained an income, that was handsome and sufficient for a country gentleman, to the very utmost, wanting to get out of it more than it could be made to give. He was not a man to be in debt, or indulge himself with present pleasures to be paid for out of the funds of future years. He was possessed of a worldly wisdom which kept him from that folly, and taught him to appreciate fully the value of independence. But he was ever remembering how many shillings there are in a pound, and how many pence in a shilling. He had a great eye to discount, and looked very closely into his bills. He searched for cheap shops;—and some men began to say of him that he had found a cheap establishment for such wines as he did not drink himself! In playing cards and in betting he was very careful, never playing high, never risking much, but hoping to turn something by the end of the year, and angry with himself if he had not done so. An unamiable man he was, but one whose heir would probably not quarrel with him,—if only he would die soon enough. He had always had a house in town, a moderate house in Berkeley Square, which belonged to him and had belonged to his father before him. Lady Clavering had usually lived there during the season; or, as had latterly been the case, during only a part of the season. And now it had come to pass, in this year, that Lady Clavering was not to come to London at all, and that Sir Hugh was meditating whether the house in Berkeley Square might not be let. The arrangement would make the difference of considerably more than a thousand a year to him. For himself, he would take lodgings. He had no idea of giving up London in the spring and early summer. But why keep up a house in Berkeley Square, as Lady Clavering did not use it?

Sir Hugh Clavering was currently in London, along with his brother Archie. Sir Hugh was a man who stretched his income, which was generous and adequate for a country gentleman, to its limits, wanting to extract more from it than it could provide. He wasn't the kind of person to go into debt or indulge in present pleasures at the expense of future finances. He had a practical wisdom that prevented such foolishness and made him appreciate the importance of independence. However, he was always mindful of how many shillings make a pound and how many pence are in a shilling. He was keen on discounts and scrutinized his bills closely. He sought out bargain shops; some men began to joke that he had found a budget-friendly place for the wines he didn't drink himself! When it came to card games and betting, he was very cautious, never playing big and never risking much, but hoping to make a profit by the end of the year, feeling frustrated with himself if he didn’t. He wasn’t a very likable person, but his heir would likely not argue with him—if he would just die soon enough. He had always owned a modest house in Berkeley Square, which was his and had been his father's before him. Lady Clavering usually stayed there during the season or, as had been the case recently, only part of it. Now, it had come to the point this year that Lady Clavering was not coming to London at all, and Sir Hugh was considering whether he should rent out the house in Berkeley Square. This move would add significantly more than a thousand pounds a year to his income. As for himself, he would find lodgings; he had no plans to leave London in the spring and early summer. But why maintain a house in Berkeley Square if Lady Clavering was not going to use it?

He was partly driven to this by a desire to shake off the burden of his brother. When Archie chose to go to Clavering the house was open to him. That was the necessity of Sir Hugh's position, and he could not avoid it unless he made it worth his while to quarrel with his brother. Archie was obedient, ringing the bell when he was told, looking after the horses, spying about, and perhaps saving as much money as he cost. But the matter was very different in Berkeley Square. No elder brother is bound to find breakfast and bed for a younger brother in London. And yet from his boyhood upwards Archie had made good his footing in Berkeley Square. In the matter of the breakfast, Sir Hugh had indeed of late got the better of him. The servants were kept on board wages, and there were no household accounts. But there was Archie's room, and Sir Hugh felt this to be a hardship.

He was partly motivated by a desire to get rid of the burden of his brother. When Archie decided to go to Clavering, the house was available to him. That was the reality of Sir Hugh's situation, and he couldn't avoid it unless he made it worth his while to fight with his brother. Archie was obedient, ringing the bell when asked, taking care of the horses, snooping around, and maybe saving as much money as he spent. But things were very different in Berkeley Square. No older brother is obligated to provide breakfast and a place to sleep for a younger brother in London. Yet, since childhood, Archie had established his presence in Berkeley Square. Regarding breakfast, Sir Hugh had recently gotten the upper hand. The staff was on standby pay, and there were no household accounts. But there was Archie’s room, and Sir Hugh considered that a burden.

The present was not the moment for actually driving forth the intruder, for Archie was now up in London, especially under his brother's auspices. And if the business on which Captain Clavering was now intent could be brought to a successful issue, the standing in the world of that young man would be very much altered. Then he would be a brother of whom Sir Hugh might be proud; a brother who would pay his way, and settle his points at whist if he lost them, even to a brother. If Archie could induce Lady Ongar to marry him, he would not be called upon any longer to ring the bells and look after the stable. He would have bells of his own, and stables too, and perhaps some captain of his own to ring them and look after them. The expulsion, therefore, was not to take place till Archie should have made his attempt upon Lady Ongar.

The current time wasn't right to kick out the intruder, since Archie was in London, especially with his brother's support. If Captain Clavering's current business could succeed, it would significantly improve that young man's reputation. He would then be a brother Sir Hugh could take pride in; a brother who would cover his expenses and settle his debts at whist, even to family. If Archie could convince Lady Ongar to marry him, he wouldn't have to ring bells or manage the stable anymore. He would have his own bells and stables, and maybe even a captain of his own to handle them. So, the expulsion wouldn’t happen until Archie had made his move on Lady Ongar.

But Sir Hugh would admit of no delay, whereas Archie himself seemed to think that the iron was not yet quite hot enough for striking. It would be better, he had suggested, to postpone the work till Julia could be coaxed down to Clavering in the autumn. He could do the work better, he thought, down at Clavering than in London. But Sir Hugh was altogether of a different opinion. Though he had already asked his sister-in-law to Clavering, when the idea had first come up, he was glad that she had declined the visit. Her coming might be very well if she accepted Archie; but he did not want to be troubled with any renewal of his responsibility respecting her, if, as was more probable, she should reject him. The world still looked askance at Lady Ongar, and Hugh did not wish to take up the armour of a paladin in her favour. If Archie married her, Archie would be the paladin; though, indeed, in that case, no paladin would be needed.

But Sir Hugh wouldn’t allow any delays, while Archie thought the timing wasn’t right yet. He suggested it would be better to wait until autumn when they could persuade Julia to come down to Clavering. He felt he could handle the work better at Clavering than in London. But Sir Hugh completely disagreed. Although he had invited his sister-in-law to Clavering when the idea first came up, he was relieved she had declined the visit. Her presence might be fine if she accepted Archie, but he didn’t want to deal with the responsibility that would come if she rejected him, which was more likely. The world still viewed Lady Ongar with suspicion, and Hugh didn’t want to take on the role of a champion for her. If Archie married her, he would be the champion; although, in that case, no champion would really be necessary.

"She has only been a widow, you know, four months," said Archie, pleading for delay. "It won't be delicate, will it?"

"She's only been a widow for four months, you know," said Archie, asking for more time. "It won't be kind, will it?"

"Delicate!" said Sir Hugh. "I don't know whether there is much of delicacy in it at all."

"Delicate!" Sir Hugh said. "I’m not sure there’s much delicacy in it at all."

"I don't see why she isn't to be treated like any other woman. If you were to die, you'd think it very odd if any fellow came up to Hermy before the season was over."

"I don't understand why she shouldn't be treated like any other woman. If you were to die, you'd find it pretty strange if any guy approached Hermy before the season was over."

"Archie, you are a fool," said Sir Hugh; and Archie could see by his brother's brow that Hugh was angry. "You say things that for folly and absurdity are beyond belief. If you can't see the peculiarities of Julia's position, I am not going to point them out to you."

"Archie, you're an idiot," Sir Hugh said, and Archie could tell by his brother's expression that Hugh was upset. "You say things that are unbelievably foolish and absurd. If you can't recognize the oddities of Julia's situation, I'm not going to explain them to you."

"She is peculiar, of course,—having so much money, and that place near Guildford, all her own for her life. Of course it's peculiar. But four months, Hugh!"

"She is strange, of course—having so much money and that place near Guildford all to herself for life. Of course it's strange. But four months, Hugh!"

"If it had been four days it need have made no difference. A home, with some one to support her, is everything to her. If you wait till lots of fellows are buzzing round her you won't have a chance. You'll find that by this time next year she'll be the top of the fashion; and if not engaged to you, she will be to some one else. I shouldn't be surprised if Harry were after her again."

"If it had been four days, it wouldn't have made a difference. A home, with someone to support her, means everything to her. If you wait until a bunch of guys are circling around her, you won’t have a chance. You'll see that by this time next year, she'll be the height of fashion; and if she's not engaged to you, she'll be with someone else. I wouldn't be surprised if Harry is after her again."

"He's engaged to that girl we saw down at Clavering."

"He's engaged to that girl we saw at Clavering."

"What matters that? Engagements can be broken as well as made. You have this great advantage over every one, except him, that you can go to her at once without doing anything out of the way. That girl that Harry has in tow may perhaps keep him away for some time."

"What does that matter? Engagements can be made and broken. You have this big advantage over everyone, except him, that you can approach her right away without causing any fuss. That girl Harry is with might keep him occupied for a while."

"I tell you what, Hugh, you might as well call with me the first time."

"I’ll tell you what, Hugh, you might as well join me the first time."

"So that I may quarrel with her, which I certainly should do,—or, rather, she with me. No, Archie; if you're afraid to go alone, you'd better give it up."

"So that I can argue with her, which I definitely would do—or, more accurately, she'd argue with me. No, Archie; if you're scared to go by yourself, you'd better drop it."

"Afraid! I'm not afraid!"

"Scared! I'm not scared!"

"She can't eat you. Remember that with her you needn't stand on your p's and q's, as you would with another woman. She knows what she is about, and will understand what she has to get as well as what she is expected to give. All I can say is, that if she accepts you, Hermy will consent that she shall go to Clavering as much as she pleases till the marriage takes place. It couldn't be done, I suppose, till after a year; and in that case she shall be married at Clavering."

"She can't eat you. Just remember that you don’t have to be overly careful around her like you might with other women. She knows what she wants and understands what she needs to do as well as what’s expected of her. All I can say is, if she accepts you, Hermy will agree that she can go to Clavering as much as she wants until the wedding happens. I guess it can’t be done until after a year; and in that case, she'll be married at Clavering."

Here was a prospect for Julia Brabazon;—to be led to the same altar, at which she had married Lord Ongar, by Archie Clavering, twelve months after her first husband's death, and little more than two years after her first wedding! The peculiarity of the position did not quite make itself apparent either to Hugh or to Archie; but there was one point which did suggest itself to the younger brother at that moment.

Here was a situation for Julia Brabazon: to be taken to the same altar where she had married Lord Ongar, by Archie Clavering, just twelve months after her first husband's death and a little over two years after her first wedding! The uniqueness of her position wasn't entirely clear to either Hugh or Archie; however, there was one thought that did occur to the younger brother at that moment.

"I don't suppose there was anything really wrong, eh?"

"I guess there wasn't anything really wrong, right?"

"Can't say, I'm sure," said Sir Hugh.

"Can't say, I'm sure," Sir Hugh said.

"Because I shouldn't like—"

"Because I shouldn't want—"

"If I were you I wouldn't trouble myself about that. Judge not, that you be not judged."

"If I were you, I wouldn't worry about that. Don't judge others, so you won’t be judged."

"Yes, that's true, to be sure," said Archie; and on that point he went forth satisfied.

"Yeah, that's true, for sure," said Archie; and with that, he left feeling satisfied.

But the job before him was a peculiar job, and that Archie well knew. In some inexplicable manner he put himself into the scales and weighed himself, and discovered his own weight with fair accuracy. And he put her into the scales, and he found that she was much the heavier of the two. How he did this,—how such men as Archie Clavering do do it,—I cannot say; but they do weigh themselves, and know their own weight, and shove themselves aside as being too light for any real service in the world. This they do, though they may fluster with their voices, and walk about with their noses in the air, and swing their canes, and try to look as large as they may. They do not look large, and they know it; and consequently they ring the bells, and look after the horses, and shove themselves on one side, so that the heavier weights may come forth and do the work. Archie Clavering, who had duly weighed himself, could hardly bring himself to believe that Lady Ongar would be fool enough to marry him! Seven thousand a year, with a park and farm in Surrey, and give it all to him,—him, Archie Clavering, who had, so to say, no weight at all! Archie Clavering, for one, could not bring himself to believe it.

But the task ahead of him was a strange one, and Archie knew that well. In some mysterious way, he measured himself and figured out his own weight pretty accurately. Then he put her on the scale and saw that she was much heavier than he was. How he did this—how guys like Archie Clavering manage to do it—I can’t explain; but they can assess their own weight and realize they’re too light for any real contribution in the world. They do this, even if they might bluster with their voices, walk around with their noses in the air, swing their canes, and try to appear as impressive as possible. They don’t look impressive, and they know it; so they ring the bells, take care of the horses, and step aside so that those who are heavier can step up and get the job done. After weighing himself, Archie Clavering could hardly believe that Lady Ongar would be foolish enough to marry him! Seven thousand a year, with a park and farm in Surrey, and give it all to him—him, Archie Clavering, who, so to speak, had no weight at all! Archie Clavering, for one, couldn’t convince himself of it.

But yet Hermy, her sister, thought it possible; and though Hermy was, as Archie had found out by his invisible scales, lighter than Julia, still she must know something of her sister's nature. And Hugh, who was by no means light,—who was a man of weight, with money and position and firm ground beneath his feet,—he also thought that it might be so. "Faint heart never won a fair lady," said Archie to himself a dozen times, as he walked down to the Rag. The Rag was his club, and there was a friend there whom he could consult confidentially. No; faint heart never won a fair lady; but they who repeat to themselves that adage, trying thereby to get courage, always have faint hearts for such work. Harry Clavering never thought of the proverb when he went a-wooing.

But Hermy, her sister, thought it was possible; and even though Hermy was, as Archie had discovered with his invisible scales, lighter than Julia, she must know something about her sister's nature. And Hugh, who was definitely not light—who was a man of substance, with money and a good position and solid ground beneath him—he also thought it might be the case. "A faint heart never won a fair lady," Archie reminded himself repeatedly as he walked down to the Rag. The Rag was his club, and there was a friend there he could talk to confidentially. No; a faint heart never won a fair lady; but those who keep telling themselves that saying, hoping to gain courage, always end up with faint hearts for such things. Harry Clavering never thought of the proverb when he was courting.

But Captain Boodle of the Rag,—for Captain Boodle always lived at the Rag when he was not at Newmarket, or at other racecourses, or in the neighbourhood of Market Harborough,—Captain Boodle knew a thing or two, and Captain Boodle was his fast friend. He would go to Boodle and arrange the campaign with him. Boodle had none of that hectoring, domineering way which Hugh never quite threw off in his intercourse with his brother. And Archie, as he went along, resolved that when Lady Ongar's money was his, and when he had a countess for his wife, he would give his elder brother a cold shoulder.

But Captain Boodle of the Rag—because Captain Boodle always stayed at the Rag when he wasn't at Newmarket, other racecourses, or around Market Harborough—Captain Boodle was someone who knew a thing or two, and he was a loyal friend. Archie would go to Boodle and plan things out with him. Boodle didn’t have that aggressive, domineering attitude that Hugh never really shook off when dealing with his brother. And as Archie moved forward, he decided that once Lady Ongar's money was his and he had a countess for a wife, he would give his older brother the cold shoulder.

Boodle was playing pool at the Rag, and Archie joined him; but pool is a game which hardly admits of confidential intercourse as to proposed wives, and Archie was obliged to remain quiet on that subject all the afternoon. He cunningly, however, lost a little money to Boodle, for Boodle liked to win,—and engaged himself to dine at the same table with his friend. Their dinner they ate almost in silence,—unless when they abused the cook, or made to each other some pithy suggestion as to the expediency of this or that delicacy,—bearing always steadily in view the cost as well as desirability of the viands. Boodle had no shame in not having this or that because it was dear. To dine with the utmost luxury at the smallest expense was a proficiency belonging to him, and of which he was very proud.

Boodle was playing pool at the bar, and Archie joined him; but pool is a game that doesn't really allow for private conversations about potential wives, so Archie had to stay quiet on that topic all afternoon. Cleverly, he lost a bit of money to Boodle since Boodle liked to win, and he arranged to have dinner at the same table with his friend. Their dinner was mostly silent—except when they criticized the cook or shared some sharp remarks about whether or not they should get this or that dish—always keeping in mind both the cost and appeal of the food. Boodle had no shame in not getting something simply because it was expensive. Dining in complete luxury while spending as little as possible was a skill he took great pride in.

But after a while the cloth was gone, and the heads of the two men were brought near together over the small table. Boodle did not speak a word till his brother captain had told his story, had pointed out all the advantages to be gained, explained in what peculiar way the course lay open to himself, and made the whole thing clear to his friend's eye.

But after a while, the cloth was gone, and the heads of the two men were brought close together over the small table. Boodle didn’t say a word until his brother captain had shared his story, highlighted all the benefits to be gained, explained exactly how the opportunity was available to him, and made everything clear to his friend's view.

"They say she's been a little queer, don't they?" said the friendly counsellor.

"They say she's been acting a bit strange, right?" said the friendly counselor.

"Of course people talk, you know."

"Of course, people talk, you know."

"Talk, yes; they're talking a doosed sight, I should say. There's no mistake about the money, I suppose?"

"Talk, yeah; they're talking a lot, I'd say. There's no doubt about the money, right?"

"Oh, none," said Archie, shaking his head vigorously. "Hugh managed all that for her, so I know it."

"Oh, none," Archie said, shaking his head vigorously. "Hugh took care of all that for her, so I know."

"She don't lose any of it because she enters herself for running again, does she?"

"She doesn't lose any of it because she signs up for running again, right?"

"Not a shilling. That's the beauty of it."

"Not a penny. That's what makes it great."

"Was you ever sweet on her before?"

"Were you ever sweet on her before?"

"What! before Ongar took her? O laws, no. She hadn't a rap, you know;—and knew how to spend money as well as any girl in London."

"What! Before Ongar took her? Oh no, not at all. She didn't have a penny, you know;—and she knew how to spend money just as well as any girl in London."

"It's all to begin then, Clavvy; all the up-hill work to be done?"

"It's all starting now, Clavvy; all the hard work ahead?"

"Well, yes; I don't know about up-hill, Doodles. What do you mean by up-hill?"

"Well, yeah; I don’t know what you mean by up-hill, Doodles. What do you mean by up-hill?"

"I mean that seven thousand a year ain't usually to be picked up merely by trotting easy along the flat. And this sort of work is very up-hill generally, I take it;—unless, you know, a fellow has a fancy for it. If a fellow is really sweet on a girl, he likes it, I suppose."

"I mean that making seven thousand a year usually doesn't happen just by coasting along. This kind of work is generally tough, I think;—unless, you know, someone has a passion for it. If someone is really into a girl, he probably enjoys it, I guess."

"She's a doosed handsome woman, you know, Doodles."

"She's a really good-looking woman, you know, Doodles."

"I don't know anything about it, except that I suppose Ongar wouldn't have taken her if she hadn't stood well on her pasterns, and had some breeding about her. I never thought much of her sister,—your brother's wife, you know,—that is in the way of looks. No doubt she runs straight, and that's a great thing. She won't go the wrong side of the post."

"I don't know much about it, except that I guess Ongar wouldn't have chosen her if she didn't have good legs and some decent lineage. I never thought highly of her sister—your brother's wife, you know—when it comes to looks. No doubt she runs smoothly, and that's a big plus. She won't veer off course."

"As for running straight, let me alone for that."

"As for running straight, I'll handle that myself."

"Well, now, Clavvy, I'll tell you what my ideas are. When a man's trying a young filly, his hands can't be too light. A touch too much will bring her on her haunches, or throw her out of her step. She should hardly feel the iron in her mouth. That's the sort of work which requires a man to know well what he's about. But when I've got to do with a trained mare, I always choose that she shall know that I'm there! Do you understand me?"

"Well, Clavvy, let me share my thoughts. When a guy is working with a young filly, he has to have a light touch. If he pulls too hard, it can throw her off balance or make her stumble. She should barely notice the bit in her mouth. That's the kind of work that requires a person to really know what they're doing. But when I'm handling a trained mare, I always make sure she knows I'm there! Do you get what I mean?"

"Yes; I understand you, Doodles."

"Yeah, I get you, Doodles."

"I always choose that she shall know that I'm there." And Captain Boodle, as he repeated these manly words with a firm voice, put out his hands as though he were handling the horse's rein. "Their mouths are never so fine then, and they generally want to be brought up to the bit, d'ye see?—up to the bit. When a mare has been trained to her work, and knows what she's at in her running, she's all the better for feeling a fellow's hands as she's going. She likes it rather. It gives her confidence, and makes her know where she is. And look here, Clavvy, when she comes to her fences, give her her head; but steady her first, and make her know that you're there. Damme; whatever you do, let her know that you're there. There's nothing like it. She'll think all the more of the fellow that's piloting her. And look here, Clavvy; ride her with spurs. Always ride a trained mare with spurs. Let her know that they're on; and if she tries to get her head, give 'em her. Yes, by George, give 'em her." And Captain Boodle in his energy twisted himself in his chair, and brought his heel round, so that it could be seen by Archie. Then he produced a sharp click with his tongue, and made the peculiar jerk with the muscle of his legs, whereby he was accustomed to evoke the agility of his horses. After that he looked triumphantly at his friend. "Give 'em her, Clavvy, and she'll like you the better for it. She'll know then that you mean it."

"I always make sure she knows I'm there." Captain Boodle said this assertively, gesturing as if he were holding the reins of a horse. "Their mouths aren’t as good then, and they usually need to be brought up to the bit, you know?—up to the bit. When a mare has been trained and knows what she’s doing, she benefits from feeling a guy's hands guiding her as she goes. She actually prefers it. It boosts her confidence and helps her understand her position. And listen, Clavvy, when she approaches her jumps, give her some freedom; but steady her first, and make sure she knows you’re there. Damn it; whatever you do, let her know you’re present. There’s nothing better than that. She’ll appreciate the guy steering her. And remember, Clavvy; use spurs. Always ride a trained mare with spurs. Let her feel them, and if she tries to take control, give them to her. Yes, by George, give them to her." With enthusiasm, Captain Boodle twisted in his chair, displaying his heel to Archie. Then he clicked his tongue sharply and made the distinctive movement with his legs that he used to prompt his horses to be quick. Afterward, he looked at his friend with pride. "Give them to her, Clavvy, and she’ll appreciate you more for it. She’ll understand you’re serious."

It was thus that Captain Boodle instructed his friend Archie Clavering how to woo Lady Ongar; and Archie, as he listened to his friend's words of wisdom, felt that he had learned a great deal. "That's the way I'll do it, Doodles," he said, "and upon my word I'm very much obliged to you."

It was this way that Captain Boodle taught his friend Archie Clavering how to win over Lady Ongar; and as Archie took in his friend's advice, he felt he had gained a lot of insight. "That's how I'll go about it, Doodles," he said, "and I really appreciate it."

"That's the way, you may depend on it. Let her know that you're there.—Let her know that you're there. She's done the filly work before, you see; and it's no good trying that again."

"That's how it is, you can count on it. Make sure she knows you're there.—Make sure she knows you're there. She's been through this before, you know; and it won't help to go through it again."

Captain Clavering really believed that he had learned a good deal, and that he now knew the way to set about the work before him. What sort of spurs he was to use, and how he was to put them on, I don't think he did know; but that was a detail as to which he did not think it necessary to consult his adviser. He sat the whole evening in the smoking-room, very silent, drinking slowly iced gin-and-water; and the more he drank the more assured he felt that he now understood the way in which he was to attempt the work before him. "Let her know I'm there," he said to himself, shaking his head gently, so that no one should observe him; "yes, let her know I'm there." At this time Captain Boodle, or Doodles as he was familiarly called, had again ascended to the billiard-room and was hard at work. "Let her know that I'm there," repeated Archie, mentally. Everything was contained in that precept. And he, with his hands before him on his knees, went through the process of steadying a horse with the snaffle-rein, just touching the curb, as he did so, for security. It was but a motion of his fingers and no one could see it, but it made him confident that he had learned his lesson. "Up to the bit," he repeated; "by George, yes; up to the bit. There's nothing like it for a trained mare. Give her head, but steady her." And Archie, as the words passed across his memory and were almost pronounced, seemed to be flying successfully over some prodigious fence. He leaned himself back a little in the saddle, and seemed to hold firm with his legs. That was the way to do it. And then the spurs! He would not forget the spurs. She should know that he wore a spur, and that, if necessary, he would use it. Then he, too, gave a little click with his tongue, and an acute observer might have seen the motion of his heel.

Captain Clavering really believed he had learned a lot and that he now knew how to tackle the task ahead of him. I don't think he understood the right kind of spurs to use or how to put them on, but he didn't feel the need to ask his advisor about that detail. He spent the entire evening in the smoking room, very quiet, slowly sipping on iced gin and water; and the more he drank, the more confident he felt that he understood the approach he needed to take. "Let her know I'm here," he thought to himself, shaking his head gently so no one would notice; "yeah, let her know I'm here." At that moment, Captain Boodle, or Doodles as he was commonly called, had gone back up to the billiard room and was hard at work. "Let her know that I'm here," Archie silently repeated. Everything was wrapped up in that idea. With his hands resting on his knees, he went through the motions of steadying a horse with the snaffle rein, just brushing the curb for security. It was just a flick of his fingers that no one could see, but it made him feel confident he had learned his lesson. "Up to the bit," he repeated; "by George, yes; up to the bit. There's nothing like it for a trained mare. Give her head, but keep her steady." As those words crossed his mind and were nearly spoken aloud, it felt like he was soaring over an enormous fence. He leaned back slightly in the saddle and felt secure with his legs. That was how to do it. And then the spurs! He wouldn't forget the spurs. She should know he wore a spur and that, if necessary, he would use it. He also gave a little click with his tongue, and a keen observer might have caught the movement of his heel.

Two hours after that he was still sitting in the smoking-room, chewing the end of a cigar, when Doodles came down victorious from the billiard-room. Archie was half asleep, and did not notice the entrance of his friend. "Let her know that you're there," said Doodles, close into Archie Clavering's ear,—"damme, let her know that you're there." Archie started and did not like the surprise, or the warm breath in his ear; but he forgave the offence for the wisdom of the words that had been spoken.

Two hours later, he was still in the smoking room, chewing on the end of a cigar, when Doodles came down triumphantly from the billiard room. Archie was half asleep and didn't notice his friend's arrival. "Make sure she knows you're here," Doodles said, leaning in close to Archie Clavering's ear, “damn it, let her know you’re here.” Archie jumped a bit, not pleased by the surprise or the warm breath on his ear, but he forgave the annoyance for the wisdom of what had been said.

Then he walked home by himself, repeating again and again the invaluable teachings of his friend.

Then he walked home alone, repeatedly going over the invaluable lessons his friend had shared.

 

 

CHAPTER XVIII.

CAPTAIN CLAVERING MAKES HIS FIRST ATTEMPT.

During breakfast on the following day,—which means from the hour of one till two, for the glasses of iced gin-and-water had been many,—Archie Clavering was making up his mind that he would begin at once. He would go to Bolton Street on that day, and make an attempt to be admitted. If not admitted to-day he would make another attempt to-morrow, and, if still unsuccessful, he would write a letter; not a letter containing an offer, which according to Archie's ideas would not be letting her know that he was there in a manner sufficiently potential,—but a letter in which he would explain that he had very grave reasons for wishing to see his near and dear connexion, Lady Ongar. Soon after two he sallied out, and he also went to a hairdresser's. He was aware that in doing so he was hardly obeying his friend to the letter, as this sort of operation would come rather under the head of handling a filly with a light touch; but he thought that he could in this way, at any rate, do no harm, if he would only remember the instructions he had received when in the presence of the trained mare. It was nearly three when he found himself in Bolton Street, having calculated that Lady Ongar might be more probably found at home then than at a later hour. But when he came to the door, instead of knocking, he passed by it. He began to remember that he had not yet made up his mind by what means he would bring it about that she should certainly know that he was there. So he took a little turn up the street, away from Piccadilly, through a narrow passage that there is in those parts, and by some stables, and down into Piccadilly, and again to Bolton Street; during which little tour he had made up his mind that it could hardly become his duty to teach her that great lesson on this occasion. She must undoubtedly be taught to know that he was there, but not so taught on this, his first visit. That lesson should quickly precede his offer; and, although he had almost hoped in the interval between two of his beakers of gin-and-water on the preceding evening that he might ride the race and win it altogether during this very morning visit he was about to make, in his cooler moments he had begun to reflect that that would hardly be practicable. The mare must get a gallop before she would be in a condition to be brought out. So Archie knocked at the door, intending merely to give the mare a gallop if he should find her in to-day.

During breakfast the next day—between one and two, since he had had quite a few glasses of iced gin-and-water—Archie Clavering was deciding that he would start right away. He planned to go to Bolton Street that day and try to get in. If he couldn’t get in today, he would try again tomorrow, and if that didn’t work, he would write a letter. Not just any letter, but one that wouldn’t just be an offer, which he thought wouldn’t make it clear he was there in a significant way. Instead, he would write to explain that he had very serious reasons for wanting to see his close relative, Lady Ongar. Shortly after two, he headed out, and he also stopped by a hairdresser. He knew that doing this wasn’t exactly following his friend’s advice to the letter, as it was more like gently handling a skittish horse, but he thought it wouldn’t hurt, as long as he remembered the guidance he’d received when with the trained horse. It was nearly three when he arrived at Bolton Street, thinking that Lady Ongar would more likely be home then than later. But when he got to the door, instead of knocking, he just walked past it. He realized he hadn’t yet decided how to make sure she knew he was there. So he took a little walk up the street, away from Piccadilly, through a narrow alley, past some stables, and back down to Piccadilly and then to Bolton Street, during which time he concluded it probably wasn’t his responsibility to teach her that important lesson right now. She definitely should know he was there, but not in a way that would happen on his first visit. That lesson should come just before he made his offer; and although he had hoped during one of his drinks the night before that he might win the race during this morning visit, in his calmer moments he began to realize that wouldn’t really be possible. The horse needed some exercise before being brought out. So Archie knocked at the door, planning just to give the horse a little exercise if she happened to be home today.

He gave his name, and was shown at once up into Lady Ongar's drawing-room. Lady Ongar was not there, but she soon came down, and entered the room with a smile on her face and with an outstretched hand. Between the man-servant who took the captain's name, and the maid-servant who carried it up to her mistress,—but who did not see the gentleman before she did so, there had arisen some mistake, and Lady Ongar, as she came down from her chamber above expected that she was to meet another man. Harry Clavering, she thought, had come to her at last. "I'll be down at once," Lady Ongar had said, dismissing the girl and then standing for a moment before her mirror as she smoothed her hair, obliterated as far as it might be possible the ugliness of her cap, and shook out the folds of her dress. A countess, a widow, a woman of the world who had seen enough to make her composed under all circumstances, one would say,—a trained mare as Doodles had called her,—she stood before her glass doubting and trembling like a girl, when she heard that Harry Clavering was waiting for her below. We may surmise that she would have spared herself some of this trouble had she known the real name of her visitor. Then, as she came slowly down the stairs, she reflected how she would receive him. He had stayed away from her, and she would be cold to him,—cold and formal as she had been on the railway platform. She knew well how to play that part. Yes; it was his turn now to show some eagerness of friendship, if there was ever to be anything more than friendship between them. But she changed all this as she put her hand upon the lock of the door. She would be honest to him,—honest and true. She was in truth glad to see him, and he should know it. What cared she now for the common ways of women and the usual coynesses of feminine coquetry? She told herself also, in language somewhat differing from that which Doodles had used, that her filly days were gone by, and that she was now a trained mare. All this passed through her mind as her hand was on the door; and then she opened it, with a smiling face and ready hand, to find herself in the presence of—Captain Archie Clavering.

He introduced himself and was immediately shown up to Lady Ongar's drawing room. Lady Ongar wasn’t there, but she soon came down, entering the room with a smile and an outstretched hand. Between the male servant who took the captain's name and the maid who delivered it to her mistress, there had been some mix-up, and Lady Ongar, descending from her room above, expected to meet someone else. She thought Harry Clavering had finally come to see her. "I’ll be right down," Lady Ongar had said, dismissing the girl, and then paused for a moment in front of her mirror to smooth her hair, try to hide the imperfections of her cap, and adjust her dress. A countess, a widow, and a worldly woman who had seen enough to remain composed in any situation, one might say—a “trained mare,” as Doodles had called her—stood before the mirror feeling uncertain and anxious like a young girl when she heard that Harry Clavering was waiting for her below. We can assume she would have saved herself some of this distress if she had known her visitor's true identity. As she slowly came down the stairs, she considered how she would greet him. He had kept his distance from her, so she would be cold towards him—just as cold and formal as she had been on the train platform. She knew exactly how to play that role. Yes, it was his turn to show a bit of enthusiasm for their friendship if they were ever going to be more than friends. But as she reached for the doorknob, she changed her mind. She decided she would be honest with him—honest and sincere. She was genuinely happy to see him, and he should know it. What did she care now for the typical behavior of women and the usual coyness of feminine flirtation? She reminded herself, in somewhat different words from Doodles’, that her flirtatious days were behind her, and she was now a trained mare. All these thoughts raced through her mind as her hand rested on the door, and then she opened it, smiling and ready to welcome him, only to find herself face-to-face with—Captain Archie Clavering.

The captain was sharp-sighted enough to observe the change in her manner. The change, indeed, was visible enough, and was such that it at once knocked out of Archie's breast some portion of the courage with which his friend's lessons had inspired him. The outstretched hand fell slowly to her side, the smile gave place to a look of composed dignity which made Archie at once feel that the fate which called upon him to woo a countess was in itself hard. And she walked slowly into the room before she spoke to him, or he to her.

The captain was perceptive enough to notice the shift in her behavior. The shift was definitely noticeable, and it immediately drained some of the courage that his friend's lessons had given Archie. Her outstretched hand slowly dropped to her side, and her smile was replaced by an expression of calm dignity that made Archie feel that the task of courting a countess was truly challenging. She walked slowly into the room before either of them said a word to each other.

"Captain Clavering!" she said at last, and there was much more of surprise than of welcome in her words as she uttered them.

"Captain Clavering!" she finally said, and there was much more surprise than welcome in her tone as she spoke.

"Yes, Lady On—, Julia, that is; I thought I might as well come and call, as I found we weren't to see you at Clavering when we were all there at Easter." When she had been living in his brother's house as one of the family he had called her Julia, as Hugh had done. The connection between them had been close, and it had come naturally to him to do so. He had thought much of this since his present project had been initiated, and had strongly resolved not to lose the advantage of his former familiarity. He had very nearly broken down at the onset, but, as the reader will have observed, had recovered himself.

"Yes, Lady On—, Julia, that is; I thought I might as well come and visit since we wouldn’t see you at Clavering when we were all there at Easter." When she had been living in his brother's house as part of the family, he had called her Julia, just like Hugh. Their bond had been close, and it felt natural for him to do so. He had thought a lot about this since starting his current plan and had made a strong decision not to lose the advantage of their past familiarity. He had almost faltered at the beginning, but as the reader may have noticed, he had managed to pull himself together.

"You are very good," she said; and then as he had been some time standing with his right hand presented to her, she just touched it with her own.

"You are really great," she said; and then, since he had been standing with his right hand extended to her for a while, she lightly touched it with her own.

"There's nothing I hate so much as stuff and nonsense," said Archie. To this remark she simply bowed, remaining awfully quiet. Captain Clavering felt that her silence was in truth awful. She had always been good at talking, and he had paused for her to say something; but when she bowed to him in that stiff manner,—"doosed stiff she was; doosed stiff, and impudent too," he told Doodles afterwards;—he knew that he must go on himself. "Stuff and nonsense is the mischief, you know." Then she bowed again. "There's been something the matter with them all down at Clavering since you came home, Julia; but hang me if I can find out what it is!" Still she was silent. "It ain't Hermy; that I must say. Hermy always speaks of you as though there had never been anything wrong." This assurance, we may say, must have been flattering to the lady whom he was about to court.

"There's nothing I hate more than nonsense," Archie said. To this comment, she just bowed, staying completely silent. Captain Clavering thought her silence was truly unsettling. She had always been good at talking, and he had paused for her to chime in; but when she bowed to him in that stiff way—"she was really stiff; really stiff, and rude too," he told Doodles later—he realized he had to continue on his own. "Nonsense is the real problem, you know." Then she bowed again. "Something's been off with everyone down at Clavering since you got back, Julia; but I can't figure out what it is!" Yet she remained quiet. "It isn't Hermy; I have to say that. Hermy always talks about you as if nothing was ever wrong." This assurance, we can say, must have been flattering to the lady he was about to pursue.

"Hermy was always too good to me," said Lady Ongar, smiling.

"Hermy was always way too good to me," said Lady Ongar, smiling.

"By George, she always does. If there's anything wrong it's been with Hugh; and, by George, I don't know what it is he was up to when you first came home. It wasn't my doing;—of course you know that."

"Honestly, she always does. If there's anything wrong, it’s been with Hugh; and honestly, I have no idea what he was up to when you first got home. It wasn't my fault;—you know that."

"I never thought that anything was your doing, Captain Clavering."

"I never thought that anything was your fault, Captain Clavering."

"I think Hugh had been losing money; I do indeed. He was like a bear with a sore head just at that time. There was no living in the house with him. I daresay Hermy may have told you all about that."

"I think Hugh was losing money; I really do. He was like a bear with a sore head during that time. It was impossible to live in the house with him. I bet Hermy might have told you all about it."

"Hermione is not by nature so communicative as you are, Captain Clavering."

"Hermione isn't as naturally chatty as you are, Captain Clavering."

"Isn't she? I should have thought between sisters—; but of course that's no business of mine." Again she was silent, awfully silent, and he became aware that he must either get up and go away or carry on the conversation himself. To do either seemed to be equally difficult, and for a while he sat there almost gasping in his misery. He was quite aware that as yet he had not made her know that he was there. He was not there, as he well knew, in his friend Doodles' sense of the word. "At any rate there isn't any good in quarrelling, is there, Julia?" he said at last. Now that he had asked a question, surely she must speak.

"Isn't she? I should've thought that between sisters—; but of course, that's not my concern." Once again, she fell silent, painfully silent, and he realized he had to either get up and leave or keep the conversation going himself. Both options felt equally hard, and for a moment he just sat there, almost gasping in his misery. He knew that he hadn’t yet made her aware of his presence. He certainly wasn’t there in the way his friend Doodles would understand. "At any rate, there's really no point in arguing, right, Julia?" he finally said. Now that he had asked a question, she had to respond.

"There is great good sometimes I think," said she, "in people remaining apart and not seeing each other. Sir Hugh Clavering has not quarrelled with me, that I am aware. Indeed, since my marriage there have been no means of quarrelling between us. But I think it quite as well that he and I should not come together."

"There is a lot of good, I think," she said, "in people staying apart and not seeing each other. Sir Hugh Clavering hasn’t had a falling out with me, as far as I know. In fact, since I got married, there haven't been any chances for us to argue. But I think it’s just as well that he and I don't meet."

"But he particularly wants you to go to Clavering."

"But he really wants you to go to Clavering."

"Has he sent you here as his messenger?"

"Did he send you here as his messenger?"

"Sent me! oh dear no; nothing of that sort. I have come altogether on my own hook. If Hugh wants a messenger he must find some one else. But you and I were always friends you know,"—at this assertion she opened her large eyes widely, and simply smiled;—"and I thought that perhaps you might be glad to see me if I called. That was all."

"Sent me! Oh no, not at all. I came entirely on my own. If Hugh needs a messenger, he’ll have to find someone else. But you and I have always been friends, you know,"—at this statement, she opened her big eyes wide and just smiled;—"and I thought you might be happy to see me if I dropped by. That was all."

"You are very good, Captain Clavering."

"You're awesome, Captain Clavering."

"I couldn't bear to think that you should be here in London, and that one shouldn't see anything of you or know anything about you. Tell me now; is there anything I can do for you? Do you want anybody to settle anything for you in the city?"

"I couldn't stand the idea of you being here in London and me not seeing you or knowing anything about you. Tell me now; is there anything I can do for you? Do you need someone to help with anything in the city?"

"I think not, Captain Clavering; thank you very much."

"I don't think so, Captain Clavering; thanks a lot."

"Because I should be so happy; I should indeed. There's nothing I should like so much as to make myself useful in some way. Isn't there anything now? There must be so much to be looked after,—about money and all that."

"Because I should be really happy; I really should. There's nothing I would love more than to make myself useful in some way. Isn’t there anything now? There has to be so much that needs attention—like money and all that."

"My lawyer does all that, Captain Clavering."

"My lawyer handles all of that, Captain Clavering."

"Those fellows are such harpies. There is no end to their charges; and all for doing things that would only be a pleasure to me."

"Those guys are such buzzards. They never stop complaining; and all for doing things that would only make me happy."

"I'm afraid I can't employ you in any matter that would suit your tastes."

"I'm afraid I can't hire you for any job that would fit your preferences."

"Can't you indeed, now?" Then again there was a silence, and Captain Clavering was beginning to think that he must go. He was willing to work hard at talking or anything else; but he could not work if no ground for starting were allowed to him. He thought he must go, though he was aware that he had not made even the slightest preparation for future obedience to his friend's precepts. He began to feel that he had commenced wrongly. He should have made her know that he was there from the first moment of her entrance into the room. He must retreat now in order that he might advance with more force on the next occasion. He had just made up his mind to this and was doubting how he might best get himself out of his chair with the purpose of going, when sudden relief came in the shape of another visitor. The door was thrown open and Madam Gordeloup was announced.

"Can’t you really, now?" Again, there was a silence, and Captain Clavering was starting to think he had to leave. He was ready to put in the effort to talk or do anything else, but he couldn’t make any progress if he wasn’t given a starting point. He felt he should go, even though he realized he hadn’t made any preparations to follow his friend’s advice in the future. He began to feel he had started off on the wrong foot. He should have made it clear that he was there from the moment she entered the room. He felt he needed to step back now so he could approach her with more confidence next time. Just as he decided this and was wondering how to get out of his chair to leave, he got an unexpected reprieve in the form of another visitor. The door swung open, and Madam Gordeloup was announced.

"Well, my angel," said the little woman, running up to her friend and kissing her on either side of her face. Then she turned round as though she had only just seen the strange gentleman, and curtseyed to him. Captain Clavering holding his hat in both his hands bowed to the little woman.

"Well, my angel," said the little woman, running up to her friend and kissing her on both cheeks. Then she turned around like she had just noticed the unfamiliar gentleman and curtsied to him. Captain Clavering, holding his hat with both hands, bowed to the little woman.

Captain Clavering makes his first attempt.
Captain Clavering is making his first attempt.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"My sister's brother-in-law, Captain Clavering," said Lady Ongar. "Madam Gordeloup."

"My sister's brother-in-law, Captain Clavering," said Lady Ongar. "Ms. Gordeloup."

Captain Clavering bowed again. "Ah, Sir Oo's brother," said Madam Gordeloup. "I am very glad to see Captain Clavering; and is your sister come?"

Captain Clavering bowed again. "Ah, Sir Oo's brother," said Madam Gordeloup. "I’m really glad to see Captain Clavering; has your sister arrived?"

"No; my sister is not come."

"No, my sister hasn't shown up."

"Lady Clavering is not in town this spring," said the captain.

"Lady Clavering isn't in town this spring," said the captain.

"Ah, not in town! Then I do pity her. There is only de one place to live in, and that is London, for April, May, and June. Lady Clavering is not coming to London?"

"Ah, not in town! Then I feel sorry for her. There’s only one place to be, and that’s London, for April, May, and June. Lady Clavering isn’t coming to London?"

"Her little boy isn't quite the thing," said the captain.

"Her little boy isn't really right," said the captain.

"Not quite de ting?" said the Franco-Pole in an inquiring voice, not exactly understanding the gentleman's language.

"Not quite the thing?" said the Franco-Polish person in a questioning tone, not fully grasping the gentleman's language.

"My little nephew is ill, and my sister does not think it wise to bring him to London."

"My little nephew is sick, and my sister doesn't think it's a good idea to take him to London."

"Ah; that is a pity. And Sir Oo? Sir Oo is in London?"

"Ah, that's too bad. And what about Sir Oo? Is Sir Oo in London?"

"Yes," said the captain; "my brother has been up some time."

"Yeah," said the captain; "my brother has been awake for a while."

"And his lady left alone in the country? Poor lady! But your English ladies like the country. They are fond of the fields and the daisies. So they say; but I think often they lie. Me; I like the houses, and the people, and the pavé. The fields are damp, and I love not rheumatism at all." Then the little woman shrugged her shoulders and shook herself. "Tell us the truth, Julie; which do you like best, the town or the country?"

"And his lady left alone in the countryside? Poor thing! But your English ladies enjoy the countryside. They love the fields and the daisies. That’s what they say; but I often think they’re not being honest. Me? I prefer the houses, the people, and the paved streets. The fields are wet, and I really don’t like rheumatism at all." Then the little woman shrugged her shoulders and shook herself. "Tell us the truth, Julie; which do you like better, the city or the countryside?"

"Whichever I'm not in, I think."

"Whichever one I'm not in, I think."

"Ah, just so. Whichever you are not in at present. That is because you are still idle. You have not settled yourself!" At this reference to the possibility of Lady Ongar settling herself, Captain Clavering pricked up his ears, and listened eagerly for what might come next. He only knew of one way in which a young woman without a husband could settle herself. "You must wait, my dear, a little longer, just a little longer, till the time of your trouble has passed by."

"Ah, exactly. Whichever one you aren't in right now. That's because you're still not doing anything. You haven't made a decision!" At this mention of the chance for Lady Ongar to figure things out, Captain Clavering perked up and listened closely for what might follow. He only knew one way a single young woman could figure things out. "You just need to wait, my dear, a little longer, just a little longer, until your troubles are over."

"Don't talk such nonsense, Sophie," said the countess.

"Stop talking nonsense, Sophie," said the countess.

"Ah, my dear, it is no nonsense. I am always telling her, Captain Clavering, that she must go through this black, troublesome time as quick as she can; and then nobody will enjoy the town so much as de rich and beautiful Lady Ongar. Is it not so, Captain Clavering?"

"Ah, my dear, this is no joke. I keep telling her, Captain Clavering, that she needs to get through this tough, dark period as quickly as possible; and then no one will enjoy the town more than the wealthy and beautiful Lady Ongar. Isn’t that right, Captain Clavering?"

Archie thought that the time had now come for him to say something pretty, so that his love might begin to know that he was there. "By George, yes, there'll be nobody so much admired when she comes out again. There never was anybody so much admired before,—before,—that is, when you were Julia Brabazon, you know; and I shouldn't wonder if you didn't come out quite as strong as ever."

Archie felt it was the right moment to say something nice, hoping his love would start to notice him. "Absolutely, no one will be as admired when she returns. No one has ever been so admired before—well, I mean, back when you were Julia Brabazon, you know; and I wouldn’t be surprised if you come back just as strong as ever."

"As strong!" said the Franco-Pole. "A woman that has been married is always more admired than a meess."

"As strong!" said the Franco-Polish. "A woman who's been married is always more admired than a girl."

"Sophie, might I ask you and Captain Clavering to be a little less personal?"

"Sophie, could I ask you and Captain Clavering to be a bit less personal?"

"There is noting I hate so much as your meesses," continued Madame Gordeloup; "noting! Your English meesses give themselves such airs. Now in Paris, or in dear Vienna, or in St. Petersburg, they are not like that at all. There they are nobodies—they are nobodies; but then they will be something very soon, which is to be better. Your English meess is so much and so grand; she never can be greater and grander. So when she is a mamma, she lives down in the country by herself, and looks after de pills and de powders. I don't like that. I don't like that at all. No; if my husband had put me into the country to look after de pills and de powders, he should have had them all, all—himself, when he came to see me." As she said this with great energy, she opened her eyes wide, and looked full into Archie's face.

"There’s nothing I hate more than your ladies," continued Madame Gordeloup; "nothing! Your English ladies act so entitled. In Paris, or in lovely Vienna, or in St. Petersburg, they aren't like that at all. There, they're nobodies—they're nobodies; but soon they'll be something much better. Your English lady is so much and so fancy; she can never be greater or fancier. So when she becomes a mom, she lives out in the country all by herself, taking care of the pills and the powders. I don’t like that. I don't like that at all. No; if my husband had put me out in the country to tend to the pills and the powders, he’d have to take them all—himself, when he came to see me." As she said this with great energy, she opened her eyes wide and looked directly into Archie's face.

Captain Clavering, who was sitting with his hat in his two hands between his knees, stared at the little foreigner. He had heard before of women poisoning their husbands, but never had heard a woman advocate the system as expedient. Nor had he often heard a woman advocate any system with the vehemence which Madame Gordeloup now displayed on this matter, and with an allusion which was so very pointed to the special position of his own sister-in-law. Did Lady Ongar agree with her? He felt as though he should like to know his Julia's opinions on that matter.

Captain Clavering, sitting with his hat clasped between his knees, stared at the little foreigner. He had heard of women poisoning their husbands before, but he had never heard a woman suggest it as a practical solution. Nor had he often heard a woman speak so passionately about any idea as Madame Gordeloup did now, especially with such a pointed reference to his own sister-in-law's situation. Did Lady Ongar share her views? He felt a strong desire to know what Julia thought about this.

"Sophie, Captain Clavering will think you are in earnest," said the countess, laughing.

"Sophie, Captain Clavering is going to think you’re serious," said the countess, laughing.

"So I am—in earnest. It is all wrong. You boil all the water out of de pot before you put the gigot into it. So the gigot is no good, is tough and dry, and you shut it up in an old house in the country. Then, to make matters pretty, you talk about de fields and de daisies. I know. 'Thank you,' I should say. 'De fields and de daisies are so nice and so good! Suppose you go down, my love, and walk in de fields, and pick de daisies, and send them up to me by de railway!' Yes, that is what I would say."

"So I am serious. It’s all wrong. You boil all the water out of the pot before you put the leg of lamb in it. So the lamb is no good, it’s tough and dry, and you keep it locked up in an old house in the country. Then, to make matters worse, you talk about the fields and the daisies. I know. 'Thank you,' I should say. 'The fields and the daisies are so nice and so lovely! Why don’t you go down, my love, and walk in the fields, and pick the daisies, and send them up to me by train!' Yes, that’s what I would say."

Captain Clavering was now quite in the dark, and began to regard the little woman as a lunatic. When she spoke of the pot and the gigot he vainly endeavoured to follow her; and now that she had got among the daisies he was more at a loss than ever. Fruit, vegetables, and cut flowers came up, he knew, to London regularly from Clavering, when the family was in town;—but no daisies. In France it must, he supposed, be different. He was aware, however, of his ignorance, and said nothing.

Captain Clavering was completely confused and started to think of the little woman as a bit crazy. When she talked about the pot and the gigot, he struggled to keep up with her; and now that she was talking about daisies, he was more lost than ever. He knew that fruit, vegetables, and cut flowers were shipped to London regularly from Clavering when the family was in town—but no daisies. He assumed it must be different in France. However, he was aware of his lack of knowledge and didn’t say anything.

"No one ever did try to shut you up, Sophie!"

"No one ever tried to silence you, Sophie!"

"No, indeed; M. Gordeloup knew better. What would he do if I were shut up? And no one will ever shut you up, my dear. If I were you, I would give no one a chance."

"No way; M. Gordeloup knew better than that. What would he do if I were locked up? And no one is ever going to shut you up, my dear. If I were you, I wouldn't give anyone a chance."

"Don't say that," said the captain, almost passionately; "don't say that."

"Don’t say that," the captain replied, almost fiercely; "don’t say that."

"Ha, ha! but I do say it. Why should a woman who has got everything marry again? If she wants de fields and de daisies she has got them of her own—yes, of her own. If she wants de town, she has got that too. Jewels,—she can go and buy them. Coaches,—there they are. Parties,—one, two, three, every night, as many as she please. Gentlemen who will be her humble slaves; such a plenty,—all London. Or, if she want to be alone, no one can come near her. Why should she marry? No."

"Ha, ha! But I'm serious. Why would a woman who has everything get married again? If she wants the countryside and the flowers, she already has them—yes, they belong to her. If she wants the city life, she has that too. Jewels—she can just go buy them. Carriages—they're all available. Parties—she can have one, two, three every night, as many as she wants. There are plenty of gentlemen who would be her devoted admirers; there's no shortage of them in London. Or, if she prefers to be alone, no one can bother her. So why would she marry? No."

"But she might be in love with somebody," said the captain, in a surprised but humble tone.

"But she might be in love with someone," said the captain, in a surprised but humble tone.

"Love! Bah! Be in love, so that she may be shut up in an old barrack with de powders!" The way in which that word barrack was pronounced, and the middle letters sounded, almost lifted the captain off his seat. "Love is very pretty at seventeen, when the imagination is telling a parcel of lies, and when life is one dream. To like people,—oh, yes; to be very fond of your friends,—oh, yes; to be most attached,—as I am to my Julie,"—here she got hold of Lady Ongar's hand,—"it is the salt of life! But what you call love, booing and cooing, with rhymes and verses about de moon, it is to go back to pap and panade, and what you call bibs. No; if a woman wants a house, and de something to live on, let her marry a husband; or if a man want to have children, let him marry a wife. But to be shut up in a country house, when everything you have got of your own,—I say it is bad."

"Love! Ugh! Be in love, so she can be stuck in some old place with all the makeup!" The way that word 'place' was said, and the way the middle letters sounded, nearly made the captain jump out of his seat. "Love is nice at seventeen when your imagination is full of lies, and life feels like a dream. To like people—oh, sure; to be really fond of your friends—absolutely; to be deeply attached—like I am to my Julie,"—she held Lady Ongar's hand—"that’s the spice of life! But what you call love, all that mushy stuff with rhymes and poems about the moon, is just going back to baby food and what you call bibs. No; if a woman wants a home and something to live on, let her marry a husband; or if a man wants kids, let him marry a wife. But being stuck in a country house when everything you own is yours—I say that’s not good."

Captain Clavering was heartily sorry that he had mentioned the fact of his sister-in-law being left at home at Clavering Park. It was most unfortunate. How could he make it understood that if he were married he would not think of shutting his wife up at Ongar Park? "Lady Clavering, you know, does come to London generally," he said.

Captain Clavering deeply regretted bringing up the fact that his sister-in-law was left at home at Clavering Park. It was really unfortunate. How could he explain that if he were married, he wouldn't dream of keeping his wife locked away at Ongar Park? "Lady Clavering usually comes to London, you know," he said.

"Bah!" exclaimed the little Franco-Pole.

"Ugh!" exclaimed the little Franco-Pole.

"And as for me, I never should be happy, if I were married, unless I had my wife with me everywhere," said Captain Clavering.

"And for me, I would never be happy if I were married, unless I had my wife with me all the time," said Captain Clavering.

"Bah-ah-ah!" ejaculated the lady.

"Bah-ah-ah!" exclaimed the lady.

Captain Clavering could not endure this any longer. He felt that the manner of the lady was, to say the least of it, unpleasant, and he perceived that he was doing no good to his own cause. So he rose from his chair and muttered some words with the intention of showing his purpose of departure.

Captain Clavering couldn't take it anymore. He found the lady's behavior, to put it mildly, off-putting, and he realized he wasn't helping his own situation. So, he got up from his chair and mumbled a few words to indicate he intended to leave.

"Good-by, Captain Clavering," said Lady Ongar. "My love to my sister when you see her."

"Goodbye, Captain Clavering," said Lady Ongar. "Send my love to my sister when you see her."

Archie shook hands with her and then made his bow to Madame Gordeloup.

Archie shook her hand and then bowed to Madame Gordeloup.

"Au revoir, my friend," she said, "and you remember all I say. It is not good for de wife to be all alone in the country, while de husband walk about in the town and make an eye to every lady he see." Archie would not trust himself to renew the argument, but bowing again, made his way off.

"Goodbye, my friend," she said, "and remember everything I say. It's not good for the wife to be all alone in the country while the husband is in town, flirting with every woman he sees." Archie didn't want to continue the argument, so he just nodded again and left.

"He was come for one admirer," said Sophie, as soon as the door was closed.

"He came for one admirer," Sophie said as soon as the door was closed.

"An admirer of whom?"

"An admirer of who?"

"Not of me;—oh, no; I was not in danger at all."

"Not from me;—oh, no; I wasn’t in any danger at all."

"Of me? Captain Clavering! Sophie, you get your head full of the strangest nonsense."

"Of me? Captain Clavering! Sophie, you fill your head with the weirdest nonsense."

"Ah; very well. You see. What will you give me if I am right? Will you bet? Why had he got on his new gloves, and had his head all smelling with stuff from de hairdresser? Does he come always perfumed like that? Does he wear shiny little boots to walk about in de morning, and make an eye always? Perhaps yes."

"Ah, alright. You see. What will you give me if I'm right? Will you make a bet? Why is he wearing his new gloves and why does his hair smell like stuff from the hairdresser? Does he always come smelling good like that? Does he wear shiny little boots to walk around in the morning and attract attention? Maybe yes."

"I never saw his boots or his eyes."

"I never saw his boots or his eyes."

"But I see them. I see many things. He come to have Ongere Park for his own. I tell you, yes. Ten thousand will come to have Ongere Park. Why not? To have Ongere Park and all de money a man will make himself smell a great deal."

"But I see them. I see many things. He comes to have Ongere Park for himself. I'm telling you, yes. Ten thousand will come to have Ongere Park. Why not? To have Ongere Park and all the money a man can make will smell a lot."

"You think much more about all that than is necessary."

"You think about all that way more than you need to."

"Do I, my dear? Very well. There are three already. There is Edouard, and there is this Clavering who you say is a captain; and there is the other Clavering who goes with his nose in the air, and who think himself a clever fellow because he learned his lesson at school and did not get himself whipped. He will be whipped yet some day,—perhaps."

"Do I, my dear? Alright then. There are already three. There's Edouard, and then there's this Clavering who you say is a captain; and there's the other Clavering who walks around with his nose in the air, thinking he's so smart just because he learned his lessons in school and didn’t get himself punished. He’ll probably get punished someday—maybe."

"Sophie, hold your tongue. Captain Clavering is my sister's brother-in-law, and Harry Clavering is my friend."

"Sophie, keep quiet. Captain Clavering is my sister's brother-in-law, and Harry Clavering is my friend."

"Ah, friend! I know what sort of friend he wants to be. How much better to have a park and plenty of money than to work in a ditch and make a railway! But he do not know the way with a woman. Perhaps he may be more at home, as you say, in the ditch. I should say to him, 'My friend, you will do well in de ditch if you work hard;—suppose you stay there.'"

"Ah, friend! I know what kind of friend he wants to be. It’s much better to have a park and plenty of money than to work in a ditch and build a railway! But he doesn’t know how to handle a woman. Maybe he’d be more comfortable, as you say, in the ditch. I would tell him, 'My friend, you’ll do well in the ditch if you work hard; why don’t you stay there?'"

"You don't seem to like my cousin, and if you please, we will talk no more about him."

"You don't seem to like my cousin, so let's just not talk about him anymore."

"Why should I not like him? He don't want to get any money from me."

"Why shouldn't I like him? He doesn't want to take any money from me."

"That will do, Sophie."

"That'll do, Sophie."

"Very well; it shall do for me. But this other man that come here to-day. He is a fool."

"Alright; that works for me. But this other guy who came here today? He’s an idiot."

"Very likely."

"Most likely."

"He did not learn his lesson without whipping."

"He didn't learn his lesson without a beating."

"Nor with whipping either."

"Not with whipping either."

"No; he have learned nothing. He does not know what to do with his hat. He is a fool. Come, Julie, will you take me out for a drive. It is melancholy for you to go alone; I came to ask you for a drive. Shall we go?" And they did go, Lady Ongar and Sophie Gordeloup together. Lady Ongar, as she submitted, despised herself for her submission; but what was she to do? It is sometimes very difficult to escape from the meshes of friendship.

"No, he hasn’t learned anything. He doesn’t know what to do with his hat. He’s an idiot. Come on, Julie, will you take me out for a drive? It’s sad for you to go alone; I came to ask you to drive me. Shall we go?" And they went, Lady Ongar and Sophie Gordeloup together. Lady Ongar, as she agreed, looked down on herself for giving in; but what else could she do? Sometimes it’s really hard to break free from the ties of friendship.

Captain Clavering, when he left Bolton Street, went down to his club, having first got rid of his shining boots and new gloves. He sauntered up into the billiard-room knowing that his friend would be there, and there he found Doodles with his coat off, the sleeves of his shirt turned back, and armed with his cue. His brother captain, the moment that he saw him, presented the cue at his breast. "Does she know you're there, old fellow; I say, does she know you're there?" The room was full of men, and the whole thing was done so publicly that Captain Clavering was almost offended.

Captain Clavering, after leaving Bolton Street, headed to his club, first taking off his shiny boots and new gloves. He wandered into the billiard room, knowing his friend would be there, and found Doodles with his coat off, shirt sleeves rolled up, and ready with his cue. As soon as his fellow captain saw him, he pointed the cue at his chest. "Does she know you're there, buddy? I mean, does she know you're there?" The room was packed with men, and the whole scene was so public that Captain Clavering was nearly offended.

"Come, Doodles, you go on with your game," said he; "it's you to play." Doodles turned to the table, and scientifically pocketed the ball on which he played; then he laid his own ball close under the cushion, picked up a shilling and put it into his waistcoat pocket, holding a lighted cigar in his mouth the while, and then he came back to his friend. "Well, Clavvy, how has it been?"

"Come on, Doodles, you keep playing," he said; "it's your turn." Doodles faced the table and skillfully pocketed the ball he was playing with; then he placed his own ball right under the cushion, pulled out a shilling, and slipped it into his waistcoat pocket, all while holding a lit cigar in his mouth. Then he returned to his friend. "So, Clavvy, how's it been?"

"Oh, nothing as yet, you know."

"Oh, nothing yet, you know."

"Haven't you seen her?"

"Have you not seen her?"

"Yes, I've seen her, of course. I'm not the fellow to let the grass grow under my feet. I've only just come from her house."

"Yeah, I've seen her, of course. I'm not the type to sit around doing nothing. I just came from her place."

"Well, well?"

"Well, well?"

"That's nothing much to tell the first day, you know."

"There's not much to say about the first day, you know."

"Did you let her know you were there? That's the chat. Damme, did you let her know you were there?"

"Did you tell her you were there? That's the talk. Damn, did you tell her you were there?"

In answer to this Archie attempted to explain that he was not as yet quite sure that he had been successful in that particular; but in the middle of his story Captain Doodles was called off to exercise his skill again, and on this occasion to pick up two shillings. "I'm sorry for you, Griggs," he said, as a very young lieutenant, whose last life he had taken, put up his cue with a look of ineffable disgust, and whose shilling Doodles had pocketed; "I'm sorry for you, very; but a fellow must play the game, you know." Whereupon Griggs walked out of the room with a gait that seemed to show that he had his own ideas upon that matter, though he did not choose to divulge them. Doodles instantly returned to his friend. "With cattle of that kind it's no use trying the waiting dodge," said he. "You should make your running at once, and trust to bottom to carry you through."

In response to this, Archie tried to explain that he wasn't completely sure he had succeeded in that area yet. However, in the middle of his story, Captain Doodles was called away to show off his skills again, this time to pick up two shillings. "I'm sorry for you, Griggs," he said, as a very young lieutenant, whose last life Doodles had taken, put up his cue with an expression of complete disgust, and whose shilling Doodles had pocketed. "I'm really sorry for you; but a guy has to play the game, you know." Griggs then walked out of the room with a stride that suggested he had his own thoughts on the matter, though he chose not to share them. Doodles immediately returned to his friend. "With people like that, it’s pointless to try the waiting game," he said. "You should make your move right away and rely on your skills to carry you through."

"But there was a horrid little Frenchwoman came in!"

"But a terrible little Frenchwoman came in!"

"What; a servant?"

"What; a helper?"

"No; a friend. Such a creature! You should have heard her talk. A kind of confidential friend she seemed, who called her Julie. I had to go away and leave her there, of course."

"No; a friend. What a character! You should have heard her talk. She was the kind of friend who seemed really close, and called her Julie. I had to leave her there, of course."

"Ah! you'll have to tip that woman."

"Ah! You need to give that woman a tip."

"What, with money?"

"What, with cash?"

"I shouldn't wonder."

"I wouldn't be surprised."

"It would come very expensive."

"It would be very expensive."

"A tenner now and then, you know. She would do your business for you. Give her a brooch first, and then offer to lend her the money. You'd find she'll rise fast enough, if you're any hand for throwing a fly."

"A tenner now and then, you know. She'd take care of your business for you. Just give her a brooch first, and then offer to lend her the money. You'll see she'll step up quickly enough if you're good at casting a line."

"Oh! I could do it, you know."

"Oh! I could totally do it, you know."

"Do it then, and let 'em both know that you're there. Yes, Parkyns, I'll divide. And, Clavvy, you can come in now in Griggs' place." Then Captain Clavering stripped himself for the battle.

"Go ahead and let both of them know you’re there. Yes, Parkyns, I’ll split it up. And, Clavvy, you can join in now instead of Griggs." Then Captain Clavering got ready for the fight.

 

 

CHAPTER XIX.

THE BLUE POSTS.

Oh; so you 'ave come to see me. I am so glad." With these words Sophie Gordeloup welcomed Harry Clavering to her room in Mount Street early one morning not long after her interview with Captain Archie in Lady Ongar's presence. On the previous evening Harry had received a note from Lady Ongar, in which she upbraided him for having left unperformed her commission with reference to Count Pateroff. The letter had begun quite abruptly. "I think it unkind of you that you do not come to me. I asked you to see a certain person on my behalf, and you have not done so. Twice he has been here. Once I was in truth out. He came again the next evening at nine, and I was then ill, and had gone to bed. You understand it all, and must know how this annoys me. I thought you would have done this for me, and I thought I should have seen you.—J." This note he found at his lodgings when he returned home at night, and on the following morning he went in his despair direct to Mount Street, on his way to the Adelphi. It was not yet ten o'clock when he was shown into Madame Gordeloup's presence, and as regarded her dress he did not find her to be quite prepared for morning visitors. But he might well be indifferent on that matter, as the lady seemed to disregard the circumstances altogether. On her head she wore what he took to be a nightcap, though I will not absolutely undertake to say that she had slept in that very head-dress. There were frills to it, and a certain attempt at prettinesses had been made; but then the attempt had been made so long ago, and the frills were so ignorant of starch and all frillish propensities, that it hardly could pretend to decency. A great white wrapper she also wore, which might not have been objectionable had it not been so long worn that it looked like a university college surplice at the end of the long vacation. Her slippers had all the ease which age could give them, and above the slippers, neatness, to say the least of it, did not predominate. But Sophie herself seemed to be quite at her ease in spite of these deficiencies, and received our hero with an eager, pointed welcome, which I can hardly describe as affectionate, and which Harry did not at all understand.

O "Oh, so you’ve come to see me. I’m so glad," said Sophie Gordeloup as she welcomed Harry Clavering into her room on Mount Street early one morning, shortly after her meeting with Captain Archie in Lady Ongar's presence. The night before, Harry had received a note from Lady Ongar scolding him for not fulfilling her request regarding Count Pateroff. The letter began quite abruptly: "I find it unkind that you don't come to see me. I asked you to meet someone for me, and you haven't done it. He’s been here twice. The first time I was actually out. He came again the next evening at nine, and I was unwell and had already gone to bed. You understand all this and must know how it frustrates me. I thought you would do this for me, and I expected to see you. —J." He found the note when he returned to his lodgings that night, and the next morning, in his despair, he went straight to Mount Street on his way to the Adelphi. It wasn’t even ten o'clock when he was shown into Madame Gordeloup's presence, and he noticed that she wasn't exactly dressed for morning visitors. But he didn’t mind much, as she seemed completely unconcerned about her appearance. On her head, she wore what looked like a nightcap, though he couldn’t be sure if it was the exact one she had slept in. It had frills, and there had been an attempt at prettiness long ago, but the frills were so limp and neglected that they hardly looked decent. She also wore a large white wrapper that might have been acceptable if it hadn’t been worn for so long that it resembled a university college surplice at the end of a long vacation. Her slippers had the comfort that comes with age, but they were lacking in neatness, to say the least. Yet Sophie seemed completely at ease in spite of her disheveled appearance and greeted Harry with an eager, pointed welcome that he found hard to interpret as affectionate, and which he didn’t quite understand.

"I have to apologize for troubling you," he began.

"I’m sorry for bothering you," he started.

"Trouble, what trouble? Bah! You give me no trouble. It is you have the trouble to come here. You come early and I have not got my crinoline. If you are contented, so am I." Then she smiled, and sat herself down suddenly, letting herself almost fall into her special corner in the sofa. "Take a chair, Mr. Harry; then we can talk more comfortable."

"Trouble, what trouble? Nonsense! You're not causing me any trouble. It's you who have the trouble of coming here. You arrived early, and I don’t have my crinoline on. If you’re happy, then I am too." Then she smiled and plopped down suddenly, almost falling into her usual spot on the sofa. "Take a seat, Mr. Harry; then we can chat more comfortably."

"I want especially to see your brother. Can you give me his address?"

"I really want to see your brother. Can you share his address with me?"

"What? Edouard—certainly; Travellers' Club."

"What? Edouard—of course; Travellers' Club."

"But he is never there."

"But he's never around."

"He sends every day for his letters. You want to see him. Why?"

"He asks for his letters every day. You want to see him. Why?"

Harry was at once confounded, having no answer. "A little private business," he said.

Harry was completely puzzled, with no response. "Just some personal stuff," he said.

"Ah; a little private business. You do not owe him a little money, I am afraid, or you would not want to see him. Ha, ha! You write to him, and he will see you. There;—there is paper and pen and ink. He shall get your letter this day."

"Ah, just a little private matter. You don't owe him any money, I’m guessing, or you wouldn’t want to meet him. Ha, ha! You should write to him, and he will see you. Look; there's paper, a pen, and some ink. He'll get your letter today."

Harry, nothing suspicious, did as he was bid, and wrote a note in which he simply told the count that he was specially desirous of seeing him.

Harry, without any suspicion, complied and wrote a note in which he simply expressed to the count that he was very eager to see him.

"I will go to you anywhere," said Harry, "if you will name a place."

"I'll go to you anywhere," Harry said, "if you just pick a place."

We, knowing Madame Gordeloup's habits, may feel little doubt but that she thought it her duty to become acquainted with the contents of the note before she sent it out of her house, but we may also know that she learned very little from it.

We, aware of Madame Gordeloup's habits, can be pretty sure that she felt it was her responsibility to read the note before sending it out of her house, but we also know that she didn't learn much from it.

"It shall go, almost immediately," said Sophie, when the envelope was closed.

"It'll go out, almost immediately," said Sophie, as soon as the envelope was sealed.

Then Harry got up to depart, having done his work. "What, you are going in that way at once? You are in a hurry?"

Then Harry stood up to leave, having finished his work. "Wait, you're leaving that way right now? Are you in a rush?"

"Well, yes; I am in a hurry, rather, Madame Gordeloup. I have got to be at my office, and I only just came up here to find out your brother's address." Then he rose and went, leaving the note behind him.

"Yes, I’m in a hurry, Madame Gordeloup. I need to get to my office, and I just came up here to get your brother's address." Then he stood up and left, leaving the note behind.

Then Madame Gordeloup, speaking to herself in French, called Harry Clavering a lout, a fool, an awkward overgrown boy, and a pig. She declared him to be a pig nine times over, then shook herself in violent disgust, and after that betook herself to the letter.

Then Madame Gordeloup, muttering to herself in French, called Harry Clavering a jerk, an idiot, an clumsy overgrown kid, and a pig. She said he was a pig nine times, then shook herself in intense disgust, and after that turned to the letter.

The letter was at any rate duly sent to the count, for before Harry had left Mr. Beilby's chambers on that day, Pateroff came to him there. Harry sat in the same room with other men, and therefore went out to see his acquaintance in a little antechamber that was used for such purposes. As he walked from one room to the other, he was conscious of the delicacy and difficulty of the task before him, and the colour was high in his face as he opened the door. But when he had done so, he saw that the count was not alone. A gentleman was with him, whom he did not introduce to Harry, and before whom Harry could not say that which he had to communicate.

The letter was definitely sent to the count because before Harry left Mr. Beilby's office that day, Pateroff came to see him there. Harry was in the same room with other people, so he stepped out to meet his acquaintance in a small antechamber that was used for that purpose. As he walked from one room to the other, he felt the weight and challenge of what he had to do, and his face flushed as he opened the door. However, when he did, he noticed that the count was not alone. There was a gentleman with him who didn't get introduced to Harry, and Harry couldn't share what he needed to say in front of him.

"Pardon me," said the count, "but we are in railroad hurry. Nobody ever was in such a haste as I and my friend. You are not engaged to-morrow? No, I see. You dine with me and my friend at the Blue Posts. You know the Blue Posts?"

"Pardon me," said the count, "but we're in a real rush here. No one has ever been in such a hurry like my friend and I. You're not busy tomorrow, are you? No, I see. You’re joining me and my friend for dinner at the Blue Posts. You know the Blue Posts?"

Harry said he did not know the Blue Posts.

Harry said he didn't know the Blue Posts.

"Then you shall know the Blue Posts. I will be your instructor. You drink claret. Come and see. You eat beefsteaks. Come and try. You love one glass of port wine with your cheese. No. But you shall love it when you have dined with me at the Blue Posts. We will dine altogether after the English way;—which is the best way in the world when it is quite good. It is quite good at the Blue Posts;—quite good! Seven o'clock. You are fined when a minute late; an extra glass of port wine a minute. Now I must go. Ah; yes. I am ruined already."

"Then you’ll know the Blue Posts. I’ll be your guide. You drink red wine. Come and see. You eat steak. Come and try. You might not love having a glass of port wine with your cheese. Not yet. But you will love it once you’ve dined with me at the Blue Posts. We’ll have dinner the English way—which is the best way in the world when it’s done right. And it’s done right at the Blue Posts—really good! Seven o'clock. You’ll be fined if you’re even a minute late; an extra glass of port for each minute. Now I have to go. Ah, yes. I’m already ruined."

Then Count Pateroff, holding his watch in his hand, bolted out of the room before Harry could say a word to him.

Then Count Pateroff, checking his watch, rushed out of the room before Harry could say anything to him.

He had nothing for it but to go to the dinner, and to the dinner he went. On that same evening, the evening of the day on which he had seen Sophie and her brother, he wrote to Lady Ongar, using to her the same manner of writing that she had used to him, and telling her that he had done his best, that he had now seen him whom he had been desired to see, but that he had not been able to speak to him. He was, however, to dine with him on the following day,—and would call in Bolton Street as soon as possible after that interview.

He had no choice but to go to the dinner, so he went. That same evening, the day he had seen Sophie and her brother, he wrote to Lady Ongar, using the same style of writing that she had used with him, and told her that he had done his best, that he had finally seen the person he was meant to meet, but that he hadn't been able to talk to him. However, he was scheduled to have dinner with him the next day—and would stop by Bolton Street as soon as he could after that meeting.

Exactly at seven o'clock, Harry, having the fear of the threatened fine before his eyes, was at the Blue Posts; and there, standing in the middle of the room, he saw Count Pateroff. With Count Pateroff was the same gentleman whom Harry had seen at the Adelphi, and whom the count now introduced as Colonel Schmoff; and also a little Englishman with a knowing eye and a bull-dog neck, and whiskers cut very short and trim,—a horsey little man, whom the count also introduced. "Captain Boodle; says he knows a cousin of yours, Mr. Clavering."

Exactly at seven o'clock, Harry, remembering the risk of the fine, arrived at the Blue Posts. There, in the middle of the room, he spotted Count Pateroff. With the Count was the same man Harry had seen at the Adelphi, who was now introduced as Colonel Schmoff; and also a small Englishman with a shrewd look, a bull-dog neck, and very short, neat whiskers—a horsey little guy, whom the Count also introduced. "Captain Boodle; he says he knows a cousin of yours, Mr. Clavering."

Then Colonel Schmoff bowed, never yet having spoken a word in Harry's hearing, and our old friend Doodles with glib volubility told Harry how intimate he was with Archie, and how he knew Sir Hugh, and how he had met Lady Clavering, and how "doosed" glad he was to meet Harry himself on this present occasion.

Then Colonel Schmoff bowed, never having spoken a word in Harry's presence, and our old friend Doodles eagerly told Harry how close he was with Archie, how he knew Sir Hugh, and how he had met Lady Clavering, and how "really" glad he was to meet Harry himself on this occasion.

"And now, my boys, we'll set down," said the count. "There's just a little soup, printanier; yes, they can make soup here; then a cut of salmon; and after that the beefsteak. Nothing more. Schmoff, my boy, can you eat beefsteak?"

"And now, my boys, let's sit down," said the count. "They've got a bit of spring soup; yes, they can make soup here; then a slice of salmon; and after that, the steak. That's it. Schmoff, my boy, can you eat steak?"

Schmoff neither smiled nor spoke, but simply bowed his head gravely, and sitting down, arranged with slow exactness his napkin over his waistcoat and lap.

Schmoff neither smiled nor spoke, but just nodded his head seriously, and as he sat down, he carefully spread his napkin over his vest and lap.

"Captain Boodle, can you eat beefsteak," said the count; "Blue Posts' beefsteak?"

"Captain Boodle, can you eat beef steak?" said the count. "Blue Posts' beef steak?"

"Try me," said Doodles. "That's all. Try me."

"Go ahead, give it a shot," said Doodles. "That's all. Just give it a shot."

"I will try you, and I will try Mr. Clavering. Schmoff would eat a horse if he had not a bullock, and a piece of a jackass if he had not a horse."

"I'll test you and Mr. Clavering. Schmoff would eat a horse if he didn't have a bullock, and a piece of a jackass if he didn't have a horse."

"I did eat a horse in Hamboro' once. We was besieged."

"I once ate a horse in Hamboro'. We were under siege."

So much said Schmoff, very slowly, in a deep bass voice, speaking from the bottom of his chest, and frowning very heavily as he did so. The exertion was so great that he did not repeat it for a considerable time.

So much, said Schmoff, very slowly, in a deep bass voice, speaking from deep in his chest, and frowning heavily as he did so. The effort was so intense that he didn't say anything again for quite a while.

"Thank God we are not besieged now," said the count, as the soup was handed round to them. "Ah, Albert, my friend, that is good soup; very good soup. My compliments to the excellent Stubbs. Mr. Clavering, the excellent Stubbs is the cook. I am quite at home here and they do their best for me. You need not fear you will have any of Schmoff's horse."

"Thank goodness we’re not under siege right now," said the count as the soup was served to them. "Ah, Albert, my friend, this soup is delicious; really good soup. Please pass along my compliments to the talented Stubbs. Mr. Clavering, Stubbs is the cook. I feel right at home here, and they really take care of me. You don’t have to worry about getting any of Schmoff's horse."

This was all very pleasant, and Harry Clavering sat down to his dinner prepared to enjoy it; but there was a sense about him during the whole time that he was being taken in and cheated, and that the count would cheat him and actually escape away from him on that evening without his being able to speak a word to him. They were dining in a public room, at a large table which they had to themselves, while others were dining at small tables round them. Even if Schmoff and Boodle had not been there, he could hardly have discussed Lady Ongar's private affairs in such a room as that. The count had brought him there to dine in this way with a premeditated purpose of throwing him over, pretending to give him the meeting that had been asked for, but intending that it should pass by and be of no avail. Such was Harry's belief, and he resolved that, though he might have to seize Pateroff by the tails of his coat, the count should not escape him without having been forced at any rate to hear what he had to say. In the meantime the dinner went on very pleasantly.

This was all very nice, and Harry Clavering sat down to his dinner ready to enjoy it; but throughout the whole time, he felt like he was being taken advantage of and cheated, and that the count would trick him and actually get away without him being able to say a word. They were dining in a public room, at a large table just for themselves, while others were at small tables around them. Even if Schmoff and Boodle hadn't been there, he could hardly discuss Lady Ongar's personal matters in a room like that. The count had brought him there to eat with a planned intention of ditching him, pretending to give him the meeting that had been requested, but actually meaning for it to go by unnoticed and be useless. That was Harry's belief, and he decided that, even if he had to grab Pateroff by the ends of his coat, the count wouldn't escape without at least hearing what he had to say. In the meantime, dinner went on quite pleasantly.

"Ah," said the count, "there is no fish like salmon early in the year; but not too early. And it should come alive from Grove, and be cooked by Stubbs."

"Ah," said the count, "there's no fish like salmon early in the year; but not too early. It should come fresh from Grove and be cooked by Stubbs."

"And eaten by me," said Boodle.

"And I ate it," said Boodle.

"Under my auspices," said the count, "and then all is well. Mr. Clavering, a little bit near the head? Not care about any particular part? That is wrong. Everybody should always learn what is the best to eat of everything, and get it if they can."

"With my guidance," said the count, "everything will be fine. Mr. Clavering, do you prefer something specific? Not interested in any particular dish? That's not right. Everyone should always know what the best food is and try to get it if possible."

"By George, I should think so," said Doodles. "I know I do."

"By George, I think so too," said Doodles. "I know I do."

"Not to know the bit out of the neck of the salmon from any other bit, is not to know a false note from a true one. Not to distinguish a '51 wine from a '58, is to look at an arm or a leg on the canvas, and to care nothing whether it is in drawing, or out of drawing. Not to know Stubbs' beefsteak from other beefsteaks, is to say that every woman is the same thing to you. Only, Stubbs will let you have his beefsteak if you will pay him,—him or his master. With the beautiful woman it is not always so;—not always. Do I make myself understood?"

"Not knowing the piece of salmon on your plate from any other piece is like not being able to tell a bad note from a good one. Not being able to tell a '51 wine from a '58 is like looking at an arm or a leg in a painting and not caring whether it’s drawn well or poorly. Not being able to recognize Stubbs' beefsteak from other beefsteaks is like saying every woman is the same to you. But Stubbs will sell you his beefsteak if you pay him—either him or his master. With a beautiful woman, it’s not always that simple—not always. Am I making myself clear?"

"Clear as mud," said Doodles. "I'm quite along with you there. Why should a man be ashamed of eating what's nice? Everybody does it."

"Clear as mud," said Doodles. "I totally agree with you. Why should someone be embarrassed about enjoying good food? Everyone does it."

"No, Captain Boodle; not everybody. Some cannot get it, and some do not know it when it comes in their way. They are to be pitied. I do pity them from the bottom of my heart. But there is one poor fellow I do pity more even than they."

"No, Captain Boodle; not everyone. Some can’t get it, and some don’t recognize it when it’s right in front of them. They deserve our sympathy. I truly feel for them. But there’s one poor guy I feel even more sorry for than them."

There was something in the tone of the count's words,—a simple pathos, and almost a melody, which interested Harry Clavering. No one knew better than Count Pateroff how to use all the inflexions of his voice, and produce from the phrases he used the very highest interest which they were capable of producing. He now spoke of his pity in a way that might almost have made a sensitive man weep. "Who is it that you pity so much?" Harry asked.

There was something in the way the count spoke—an underlying sadness and almost a musical quality—that caught Harry Clavering's attention. No one understood better than Count Pateroff how to manipulate the tones of his voice to create the most compelling interest from his words. He now talked about his pity in a way that could have brought a tear to a sensitive person's eye. "Who is it that you pity so much?" Harry asked.

"The man who cannot digest," said the count, in a low clear voice. Then he bent down his head over the morsel of food on his plate, as though he were desirous of hiding a tear. "The man who cannot digest!" As he repeated the words he raised his head again, and looked round at all their faces.

"The man who can’t digest," said the count, in a low, clear voice. Then he leaned down over the piece of food on his plate, as if he wanted to hide a tear. "The man who can’t digest!" As he repeated the words, he lifted his head again and looked around at all their faces.

"Yes, yes;—mein Gott, yes," said Schmoff, and even he appeared as though he were almost moved from the deep quietude of his inward indifference.

"Yeah, yeah;—my God, yes," said Schmoff, and even he seemed like he was almost shaken from the deep calm of his inner indifference.

"Ah; talk of blessings! What a blessing is digestion!" said the count. "I do not know whether you have ever thought of it, Captain Boodle? You are young, and perhaps not. Or you, Mr. Clavering? It is a subject worthy of your thoughts. To digest! Do you know what it means? It is to have the sun always shining, and the shade always ready for you. It is to be met with smiles, and to be greeted with kisses. It is to hear sweet sounds, to sleep with sweet dreams, to be touched ever by gentle, soft, cool hands. It is to be in paradise. Adam and Eve were in paradise. Why? Their digestion was good. Ah! then they took liberties, eat bad fruit,—things they could not digest. They what we call, ruined their constitutions, destroyed their gastric juices, and then they were expelled from paradise by an angel with a flaming sword. The angel with the flaming sword, which turned two ways, was indigestion! There came a great indigestion upon the earth because the cooks were bad, and they called it a deluge. Ah, I thank God there is to be no more deluges. All the evils come from this. Macbeth could not sleep. It was the supper, not the murder. His wife talked and walked. It was the supper again. Milton had a bad digestion because he is always so cross; and your Carlyle must have the worst digestion in the world, because he never says any good of anything. Ah, to digest is to be happy! Believe me, my friends, there is no other way not to be turned out of paradise by a fiery two-handed turning sword."

"Ah, talk about blessings! What a blessing digestion is!" said the count. "I don't know if you've ever thought about it, Captain Boodle? You’re young, so maybe not. Or you, Mr. Clavering? It’s a topic worth considering. To digest! Do you know what that means? It means having the sun always shining and shade always ready for you. It means being met with smiles and greeted with kisses. It means hearing sweet sounds, sleeping with sweet dreams, being touched by gentle, soft, cool hands. It’s like being in paradise. Adam and Eve were in paradise. Why? Their digestion was good. Ah! But then they overstepped, ate bad fruit—things they couldn’t digest. They essentially ruined their bodies, destroyed their gastric juices, and then they were kicked out of paradise by an angel with a flaming sword. The angel with the flaming sword that turned both ways was indigestion! A great indigestion spread across the earth because the cooks were terrible, and they called it a deluge. Ah, I thank God there are no more deluges. All evils stem from this. Macbeth couldn't sleep. It was the dinner, not the murder. His wife talked and walked around. It was the dinner again. Milton had bad digestion because he was always so irritable; and your Carlyle must have the worst digestion in the world, because he never says anything positive. Ah, to digest is to be happy! Believe me, my friends, there’s no other way to avoid being kicked out of paradise by a fiery two-handed sword."

"It is true," said Schmoff; "yes, it is true."

"It’s true," said Schmoff; "yes, it’s true."

"I believe you," said Doodles. "And how well the count describes it, don't he, Mr. Clavering? I never looked at it in that light; but, after all, digestion is everything. What is a horse worth, if he won't feed?"

"I believe you," said Doodles. "And the count explains it perfectly, doesn’t he, Mr. Clavering? I never thought of it that way; but, in the end, digestion is key. What’s a horse worth if he won’t eat?"

"I never thought much about it," said Harry.

"I never thought much about it," Harry said.

"That is very good," said the great preacher. "Not to think about it ever is the best thing in the world. You will be made to think about it if there be necessity. A friend of mine told me he did not know whether he had a digestion. My friend, I said, you are like the husbandmen; you do not know your own blessings. A bit more steak, Mr. Clavering; see, it has come up hot, just to prove that you have the blessing."

"That's really great," said the renowned preacher. "Not thinking about it at all is the best thing ever. If there's a need, you'll be made to think about it. A friend of mine mentioned that he wasn't sure if he had a digestion. I told him, you’re just like the farmers; you don’t recognize your own blessings. A little more steak, Mr. Clavering; look, it’s come up hot, just to show that you have the blessing."

There was a pause in the conversation for a minute or two, during which Schmoff and Doodles were very busy giving the required proof; and the count was leaning back in his chair, with a smile of conscious wisdom on his face, looking as though he were in deep consideration of the subject on which he had just spoken with so much eloquence. Harry did not interrupt the silence, as, foolishly, he was allowing his mind to carry itself away from the scene of enjoyment that was present, and trouble itself with the coming battle which he would be obliged to fight with the count. Schmoff was the first to speak. "When I was eating a horse at Hamboro'—" he began.

There was a brief pause in the conversation for a minute or two, during which Schmoff and Doodles focused on providing the necessary proof; the count leaned back in his chair, wearing a smile of self-satisfied wisdom, looking as if he were deeply pondering the topic he had just spoken about with such eloquence. Harry didn’t break the silence, foolishly allowing his thoughts to drift away from the enjoyment of the moment and worrying instead about the impending battle he would have to face with the count. Schmoff was the first to break the silence. "When I was eating a horse at Hamboro'—" he started.

"Schmoff," said the count, "if we allow you to get behind the ramparts of that besieged city, we shall have to eat that horse for the rest of the evening. Captain Boodle, if you will believe me, I eat that horse once for two hours. Ah, here is the port wine. Now, Mr. Clavering, this is the wine for cheese;—'34. No man should drink above two glasses of '34. If you want port after that, then have '20."

"Schmoff," said the count, "if we let you get behind the walls of that besieged city, we’ll have to eat that horse for the rest of the night. Captain Boodle, if you believe me, I once ate that horse for two hours. Ah, here comes the port wine. Now, Mr. Clavering, this is the wine for cheese;—'34. No one should drink more than two glasses of '34. If you want port after that, then go for '20."

Schmoff had certainly been hardly treated. He had scarcely spoken a word during dinner, and should, I think, have been allowed to say something of the flavour of the horse. It did not, however, appear from his countenance that he had felt, or that he resented the interference; though he did not make any further attempt to enliven the conversation.

Schmoff had definitely been treated poorly. He hardly spoke a word during dinner and, in my opinion, should have been allowed to share his thoughts on the flavor of the horse. However, from his expression, it didn't seem like he felt or cared about the interruption; although he didn’t try to keep the conversation going any further.

They did not sit long over their wine, and the count, in spite of what he had said about the claret, did not drink any. "Captain Boodle," he said, "you must respect my weakness as well as my strength. I know what I can do, and what I cannot. If I were a real hero, like you English,—which means, if I had an ostrich in my inside,—I would drink till twelve every night, and eat broiled bones till six every morning. But alas! the ostrich has not been given to me. As a common man I am pretty well, but I have no heroic capacities. We will have a little chasse, and then we will smoke."

They didn’t linger long over their wine, and the count, despite his comments about the claret, didn’t have any. “Captain Boodle,” he said, “you have to respect my weaknesses as well as my strengths. I know what I can handle and what I can’t. If I were a true hero, like you English—meaning if I could eat like an ostrich—I would drink until midnight and chow down on broiled bones until six in the morning. But sadly, that’s not me. As an ordinary guy, I’m doing all right, but I don’t have any heroic qualities. Let’s go for a little hunt, and then we’ll smoke.”

Harry began to be very nervous. How was he to do it? It had become clearer and clearer to him through every ten minutes of the dinner, that the count did not intend to give him any moment for private conversation. He felt that he was cheated and ill-used, and was waxing angry. They were to go and smoke in a public room, and he knew, or thought he knew, what that meant. The count would sit there till he went, and had brought the Colonel Schmoff with him, so that he might be sure of some ally to remain by his side and ensure silence. And the count, doubtless, had calculated that when Captain Boodle went, as he soon would go, to his billiards, he, Harry Clavering, would feel himself compelled to go also. No! It should not result in that way. Harry resolved that he would not go. He had his mission to perform and he would perform it, even if he were compelled to do so in the presence of Colonel Schmoff.

Harry started to feel really nervous. How was he supposed to do it? It became more and more obvious to him with every ten minutes of dinner that the count wasn’t planning to give him any chance for a private conversation. He felt cheated and mistreated, and he was getting angrier. They were supposed to go and smoke in a public room, and he knew, or thought he knew, what that meant. The count would stick around until he left, bringing Colonel Schmoff along to ensure he had someone by his side to keep things quiet. The count probably figured that once Captain Boodle left for billiards, which he would soon, Harry Clavering would feel pressured to leave too. No! That wasn’t going to happen. Harry decided he wouldn’t go. He had his mission to complete, and he would do it, even if it meant doing it in front of Colonel Schmoff.

Doodles soon went. He could not sit long with the simple gratification of a cigar, without gin-and-water or other comfort of that kind, even though the eloquence of Count Pateroff might be excited in his favour. He was a man, indeed, who did not love to sit still, even with the comfort of gin-and-water. An active little man was Captain Boodle, always doing something or anxious to do something in his own line of business. Small speculations in money, so concocted as to leave the risk against him smaller than the chance on his side, constituted Captain Boodle's trade; and in that trade he was indefatigable, ingenious, and, to a certain extent, successful. The worst of the trade was this: that though he worked at it above twelve hours a day, to the exclusion of all other interests in life, he could only make out of it an income which would have been considered a beggarly failure at any other profession. When he netted a pound a day he considered himself to have done very well; but he could not do that every day in the week. To do it often required unremitting exertion. And then, in spite of all his care, misfortunes would come. "A cursed garron, of whom nobody had ever heard the name! If a man mayn't take a liberty with such a brute as that, when is he to take a liberty?" So had he expressed himself plaintively, endeavouring to excuse himself, when on some occasion a race had been won by some outside horse which Captain Boodle had omitted to make safe in his betting-book. He was regarded by his intimate friends as a very successful man; but I think myself that his life was a mistake. To live with one's hands ever daubed with chalk from a billiard-table, to be always spying into stables and rubbing against grooms, to put up with the narrow lodgings which needy men encounter at race meetings, to be day after day on the rails running after platers and steeplechasers, to be conscious on all occasions of the expediency of selling your beast when you are hunting, to be counting up little odds at all your spare moments;—these things do not, I think, make a satisfactory life for a young man. And for a man that is not young, they are the very devil! Better have no digestion when you are forty than find yourself living such a life as that! Captain Boodle would, I think, have been happier had he contrived to get himself employed as a tax-gatherer or an attorney's clerk.

Doodles soon left. He couldn't sit for long just enjoying a cigar without wanting gin-and-water or some other comfort, even if the persuasive talk of Count Pateroff was in his favor. He was a man who didn’t like to sit still, even with the comfort of gin-and-water. Captain Boodle was an active little man, always busy or eager to do something related to his work. Small money speculations, designed to minimize his risks compared to his potential gains, made up Captain Boodle's business; and in that business, he was tireless, clever, and, to some extent, successful. The downside of this trade was that, despite putting in over twelve hours a day with no other interests, he could only earn an income that would be seen as a pitiful failure in any other profession. When he managed to net a pound a day, he considered it a big achievement; but he couldn't do that every day of the week. Doing it often took constant effort. And then, no matter how careful he was, bad luck would strike. "A cursed nag, whose name nobody had ever heard! If a man can’t take a chance on a brute like that, when is he supposed to take one?" This was how he lamented, trying to justify himself when an unexpected horse won a race that Captain Boodle had neglected to cover in his betting book. His close friends viewed him as quite successful, but I believe his life was a mistake. Living with his hands constantly covered in chalk from the billiard table, always peeking into stables and mingling with grooms, putting up with the cramped lodgings that broke men face at race meetings, chasing after racers day after day, always aware of the need to sell your horse while you're still hunting, and counting up small odds in every spare moment—these things, I think, don’t create a fulfilling life for a young man. And for someone not so young, they’d be a nightmare! It’s better to have poor digestion at forty than to find yourself living a life like that! I believe Captain Boodle would have been happier if he had found a job as a tax collector or a lawyer's assistant.

On this occasion Doodles soon went, as had been expected, and Harry found himself smoking with the two foreigners. Pateroff was no longer eloquent, but sat with his cigar in his mouth as silent as Colonel Schmoff himself. It was evidently expected of Harry that he should go.

On this occasion, Doodles quickly left, as expected, and Harry found himself smoking with the two foreigners. Pateroff was no longer talkative; he sat with his cigar in his mouth, as quiet as Colonel Schmoff himself. It was clear that everyone expected Harry to leave.

"Count," he said at last, "you got my note?" There were seven or eight persons sitting in the room besides the party of three to which Harry belonged.

"Count," he finally said, "did you get my note?" There were seven or eight other people in the room besides Harry's group of three.

"Your note, Mr. Clavering! which note? Oh, yes; I should not have had the pleasure of seeing you here to-day but for that."

"Your note, Mr. Clavering! Which note? Oh, right; I wouldn’t have had the pleasure of seeing you here today if it weren't for that."

"Can you give me five minutes in private?"

"Can you give me five minutes alone?"

"What! now! here! this evening! after dinner? Another time I will talk with you by the hour together."

"What! Now! Here! This evening! After dinner? Another time, I’ll talk with you for hours."

"I fear I must trouble you now. I need not remind you that I could not keep you yesterday morning; you were so much hurried."

"I’m sorry to bother you right now. I shouldn’t have to remind you that I couldn’t keep you yesterday morning; you were in such a rush."

"And now I am having my little moment of comfort! These special business conversations after dinner are so bad for the digestion!"

"And now I'm enjoying my little moment of comfort! These special business talks after dinner are really bad for digestion!"

"If I could have caught you before dinner, Count Pateroff, I would have done so."

"If I could have caught you before dinner, Count Pateroff, I would have."

"If it must be, it must. Schmoff, will you wait for me ten minutes? I will not be more than ten minutes." And the count as he made this promise looked at his watch. "Waiter," he said, speaking in a sharp tone which Harry had not heard before, "show this gentleman and me into a private room." Harry got up and led the way out, not forgetting to assure himself that he cared nothing for the sharpness of the count's voice.

"If it has to be, it has to be. Schmoff, can you wait for me for ten minutes? I won’t be longer than that." And as he made this promise, the count glanced at his watch. "Waiter," he said, speaking in a sharp tone that Harry hadn’t heard before, "please take this gentleman and me to a private room." Harry got up and led the way out, making sure to remind himself that he didn’t care about the count’s sharp tone.

"Now, Mr. Clavering, what is it?" said the count, looking full into Harry's eye.

"Now, Mr. Clavering, what’s going on?" said the count, looking directly into Harry's eye.

"I will tell you in two words."

"I'll tell you in two words."

"In one if you can."

"In one if you can."

"I came with a message to you from Lady Ongar."

"I have a message for you from Lady Ongar."

"Why are you a messenger from Lady Ongar?"

"Why are you delivering a message from Lady Ongar?"

"I have known her long and she is connected with my family."

"I've known her for a long time, and she’s part of my family."

"Why does she not send her messages by Sir Hugh,—her brother-in-law?"

"Why doesn't she send her messages through Sir Hugh, her brother-in-law?"

"It is hardly for you to ask that!"

"It’s really not your place to ask that!"

"Yes; it is for me to ask that. I have known Lady Ongar well, and have treated her with kindness. I do not want to have messages by anybody. But go on. If you are a messenger, give your message."

"Yes, I’m the one who should be asking that. I’ve known Lady Ongar well and have treated her kindly. I don’t want messages delivered by anyone else. But go ahead. If you’re a messenger, just deliver your message."

"Lady Ongar bids me tell you that she cannot see you."

"Lady Ongar asked me to let you know that she can't meet with you."

"But she must see me. She shall see me!"

"But she has to see me. She will see me!"

"I am to explain to you that she declines to do so. Surely, Count Pateroff, you must understand—"

"I need to let you know that she refuses to do that. Surely, Count Pateroff, you must understand—

"Ah, bah; I understand everything;—in such matters as these, better, perhaps, than you, Mr. Clavering. You have given your message. Now, as you are a messenger, will you give mine?"

"Ah, come on; I get everything;—in situations like this, maybe even better than you, Mr. Clavering. You've delivered your message. Now, since you're a messenger, will you deliver mine?"

"That will depend altogether on its nature."

"That will completely depend on what it is."

"Sir, I never send uncivil words to a woman, though sometimes I may be tempted to speak them to a man; when, for instance, a man interferes with me; do you understand? My message is this:—tell her ladyship, with my compliments, that it will be better for her to see me,—better for her, and for me. When that poor lord died,—and he had been, mind, my friend for many years before her ladyship had heard his name,—I was with him; and there were occurrences of which you know nothing and need know nothing. I did my best then to be courteous to Lady Ongar, which she returns by shutting her door in my face. I do not mind that. I am not angry with a woman. But tell her that when she has heard what I now say to her by you, she will, I do not doubt, think better of it; and therefore I shall do myself the honour of presenting myself at her door again. Good-night, Mr. Clavering; au revoir; we will have another of Stubbs' little dinners before long." As he spoke these last words the count's voice was again changed, and the old smile had returned to his face.

"Sir, I never use rude words with a woman, although I might be tempted to say them to a man when, for example, a man gets in my way; do you get what I mean? My message is this:—please tell her ladyship, with my compliments, that it would be better for her to meet with me—better for both her and me. When that poor lord passed away—and he had been my friend for many years before her ladyship even knew his name—I was with him. There were events you know nothing about and don’t need to know about. I did my best to be polite to Lady Ongar then, but she responds by shutting the door in my face. I don’t mind that. I’m not angry at a woman. But tell her that after she hears what I’m saying to her through you, I’m sure she’ll think differently; and for that reason, I plan to honorably show up at her door again. Good night, Mr. Clavering; see you later; we'll have another one of Stubbs' little dinners soon." As he finished these last words, the count's voice changed again, and the old smile returned to his face.

Harry shook hands with him and walked away homewards, not without a feeling that the count had got the better of him, even to the end. He had, however, learned how the land lay, and could explain to Lady Ongar that Count Pateroff now knew her wishes and was determined to disregard them.

Harry shook hands with him and walked home, feeling like the count had outsmarted him, even to the end. However, he had figured out the situation and could tell Lady Ongar that Count Pateroff was aware of her wishes and was set on ignoring them.

 

 

CHAPTER XX.

DESOLATION.

In the meantime there was grief down at the great house of Clavering; and grief, we must suppose also, at the house in Berkeley Square, as soon as the news from his country home had reached Sir Hugh Clavering. Little Hughy, his heir, was dead. Early one morning, Mrs. Clavering, at the rectory, received a message from Lady Clavering, begging that she would go up to the house, and, on arriving there, she found that the poor child was very ill. The doctor was then at Clavering, and had recommended that a message should be sent to the father in London, begging him to come down. This message had been already despatched when Mrs. Clavering arrived. The poor mother was in a state of terrible agony, but at that time there was yet hope. Mrs. Clavering then remained with Lady Clavering for two or three hours; but just before dinner on the same day another messenger came across to say that hope was past, and that the child had gone. Could Mrs. Clavering come over again, as Lady Clavering was in a sad way?

In the meantime, there was sorrow at the large Clavering house; and we can assume there was also sorrow at the house in Berkeley Square as soon as Sir Hugh Clavering received the news from his country home. Little Hughy, his heir, was dead. Early one morning, Mrs. Clavering at the rectory got a message from Lady Clavering, asking her to come to the house. When she arrived, she found that the poor child was very sick. The doctor was already at Clavering and had advised that a message be sent to the father in London, asking him to come down. This message had been sent before Mrs. Clavering arrived. The poor mother was in terrible distress, but there was still some hope at that time. Mrs. Clavering stayed with Lady Clavering for two or three hours; however, just before dinner on the same day, another messenger came over to say that hope was gone and that the child had passed away. Could Mrs. Clavering come back again, as Lady Clavering was in a very bad state?

"You'll have your dinner first?" said the rector.

"You'll have your dinner first?" the rector asked.

"No, I think not. I shall wish to make her take something, and I can do it better if I ask for tea for myself. I will go at once. Poor dear little boy."

"No, I don’t think so. I’ll want to get her to take something, and I can do it better if I ask for tea for myself. I’ll go right away. Poor little guy."

"It was a blow I always feared," said the rector to his daughter as soon as his wife had left them. "Indeed, I knew that it was coming."

"It was a blow I always feared," the rector said to his daughter as soon as his wife had left them. "Honestly, I knew it was coming."

"And she was always fearing it," said Fanny. "But I do not think he did. He never seems to think that evil will come to him."

"And she was always afraid of it," Fanny said. "But I don't think he did. He never seems to believe that something bad will happen to him."

"He will feel this," said the rector.

"He will feel this," said the rector.

"Feel it, papa! Of course he will feel it."

"Feel it, dad! Of course he will feel it."

"I do not think he would,—not deeply, that is,—if there were four or five of them. He is a hard man;—the hardest man I ever knew. Who ever saw him playing with his own child, or with any other? Who ever heard him say a soft word to his wife? But he will be hit now, for this child was his heir. He will be hit hard now, and I pity him."

"I don’t think he would—at least not deeply—if there were four or five of them. He’s a tough guy; the toughest I’ve ever met. Who has ever seen him playing with his own kid or with anyone else? Who has ever heard him say a kind word to his wife? But he’s going to feel this now, since this child was his heir. He’s going to feel it hard now, and I feel for him."

Mrs. Clavering went across the park alone, and soon found herself in the poor bereaved mother's room. She was sitting by herself, having driven the old housekeeper away from her; and there were no traces of tears then on her face, though she had wept plentifully when Mrs. Clavering had been with her in the morning. But there had come upon her suddenly a look of age, which nothing but such sorrow as this can produce. Mrs. Clavering was surprised to see that she had dressed herself carefully since the morning, as was her custom to do daily, even when alone; and that she was not in her bedroom, but in a small sitting-room which she generally used when Sir Hugh was not at the park.

Mrs. Clavering walked across the park by herself and soon found herself in the room of the grieving mother. She was sitting alone, having sent the old housekeeper away; there were no traces of tears on her face, even though she had cried a lot when Mrs. Clavering was with her in the morning. However, a sudden look of age had come over her, something only deep sorrow can bring. Mrs. Clavering was surprised to see that she had dressed herself neatly since the morning, as she usually did every day, even when she was alone; and that she was not in her bedroom, but in a small sitting room she usually used when Sir Hugh was not at the park.

"My poor Hermione," said Mrs. Clavering, coming up to her, and taking her by the hand.

"My poor Hermione," Mrs. Clavering said, approaching her and taking her hand.

"Yes, I am poor; poor enough. Why have they troubled you to come across again?"

"Yeah, I'm broke; really broke. Why did they ask you to come back?"

"Did you not send for me? But it was quite right, whether you sent or no. Of course I should come when I heard it. It cannot be good for you to be all alone."

"Did you not call for me? But it was totally fine, whether you did or not. Of course, I would come when I found out. It can't be good for you to be all by yourself."

"I suppose he will be here to-night?"

"I guess he'll be here tonight?"

"Yes, if he got your message before three o'clock."

"Yeah, if he saw your message before three o'clock."

"Oh, he will have received it, and I suppose he will come. You think he will come, eh?"

"Oh, he'll have gotten it, and I guess he'll show up. You think he'll come, right?"

"Of course he will come."

"Of course, he'll come."

"I do not know. He does not like coming to the country."

"I don't know. He doesn't like coming to the country."

"He will be sure to come now, Hermione."

"He will definitely come now, Hermione."

"And who will tell him? Some one must tell him before he comes to me. Should there not be some one to tell him? They have sent another message."

"And who’s going to tell him? Someone has to tell him before he comes to me. Shouldn’t there be someone to inform him? They’ve sent another message."

"Hannah shall be at hand to tell him." Hannah was the old housekeeper who had been in the family when Sir Hugh was born. "Or, if you wish it, Henry shall come down and remain here. I am sure he will do so, if it will be a comfort."

"Hannah will be here to tell him." Hannah was the longtime housekeeper who had been with the family since Sir Hugh was born. "Or, if you'd prefer, Henry can come down and stay here. I'm sure he will, if it will make you feel better."

"No; he would, perhaps, be rough to Mr. Clavering. He is so very hard. Hannah shall do it. Will you make her understand?" Mrs. Clavering promised that she would do this, wondering, as she did so, at the wretched, frigid immobility of the unfortunate woman before her. She knew Lady Clavering well;—knew her to be in many things weak, to be worldly, listless, and perhaps somewhat selfish; but she knew also that she had loved her child as mothers always love. Yet, at this moment, it seemed that she was thinking more of her husband than of the bairn she had lost. Mrs. Clavering had sat down by her and taken her hand, and was still so sitting in silence when Lady Clavering spoke again. "I suppose he will turn me out of his house now," she said.

"No; he might be harsh with Mr. Clavering. He's really tough. Hannah can handle it. Will you help her understand?" Mrs. Clavering assured her that she would, all the while wondering at the miserable, icy stillness of the unfortunate woman in front of her. She knew Lady Clavering well; she recognized her as being weak in many ways, worldly, apathetic, and maybe a bit selfish; but she also knew that she had loved her child like all mothers do. Still, at that moment, it seemed like she cared more about her husband than the child she had lost. Mrs. Clavering had sat down next to her and taken her hand, and they remained in silence until Lady Clavering spoke again. "I guess he'll throw me out of his house now," she said.

"Who will do so? Hugh? Oh, Hermione, how can you speak in such a way?"

"Who will do that? Hugh? Oh, Hermione, how can you talk like that?"

"He scolded me before because my poor darling was not strong. My darling! How could I help it? And he scolded me because there was none other but he. He will turn me out altogether now. Oh, Mrs. Clavering, you do not know how hard he is."

"He yelled at me earlier because my poor sweetheart wasn't strong. My sweetheart! What could I do about it? And he yelled at me because there was no one else but him. He's going to kick me out completely now. Oh, Mrs. Clavering, you have no idea how tough he is."

Anything was better than this, and therefore Mrs. Clavering asked the poor woman to take her into the room where the little body lay in its little cot. If she could induce the mother to weep for the child, even that would be better than this hard persistent fear as to what her husband would say and do. So they both went and stood together over the little fellow whose short sufferings had thus been brought to an end. "My poor dear, what can I say to comfort you?" Mrs. Clavering, as she asked this, knew well that no comfort could be spoken in words; but—if she could only make the sufferer weep!

Anything was better than this, so Mrs. Clavering asked the grieving woman to take her to the room where the little body lay in its tiny crib. If she could get the mother to cry for the child, that would be better than this ongoing fear about what her husband would say and do. So they both went and stood together over the little boy whose brief suffering had finally come to an end. "My poor dear, what can I say to comfort you?" Mrs. Clavering asked, fully aware that no words could truly bring comfort; but—if only she could make the mother cry!

"Comfort!" said the mother. "There is no comfort now, I believe, in anything. It is long since I knew any comfort;—not since Julia went."

"Comfort!" said the mother. "I don't think there's any comfort in anything right now. It's been a long time since I felt any comfort—not since Julia left."

"Have you written to Julia?"

"Did you message Julia?"

"No; I have written to no one. I cannot write. I feel as though if it were to bring him back again I could not write of it. My boy! my boy! my boy!" But still there was not a tear in her eye.

"No; I haven't written to anyone. I can't write. It feels like if it would bring him back, I still couldn't write about it. My boy! My boy! My boy!" But still, there wasn't a tear in her eye.

"I will write to Julia," said Mrs. Clavering; "and I will read to you my letter."

"I'll write to Julia," said Mrs. Clavering, "and I'll read my letter to you."

"No, do not read it me. What is the use? He has made her quarrel with me. Julia cares nothing now for me, or for my angel. Why should she care? When she came home we would not see her. Of course she will not care. Who is there that will care for me?"

"No, don’t read it to me. What’s the point? He made her fight with me. Julia doesn’t care about me anymore, or about my angel. Why should she? When she came back, we wouldn’t see her. Of course, she won’t care. Who is there that will care about me?"

"Do not I care for you, Hermione?"

"Don't I care about you, Hermione?"

"Yes, because you are here; because of the nearness of the houses. If you lived far away you would not care for me. It is just the custom of the thing." There was something so true in this that Mrs. Clavering could make no answer to it. Then they turned to go back into the sitting-room, and as they did so Lady Clavering lingered behind for a moment; but when she was again with Mrs. Clavering her cheek was still dry.

"Yes, it's because you're here; because the houses are close together. If you lived far away, you wouldn't care about me. It's just how things are." There was something so true about this that Mrs. Clavering had no response. Then they turned to head back into the sitting room, and as they did, Lady Clavering paused for a moment. But when she was back with Mrs. Clavering, her cheek was still dry.

"He will be at the station at nine," said Lady Clavering. "They must send the brougham for him, or the dog-cart. He will be very angry if he is made to come home in the fly from the public-house." Then the elder lady left the room and gave orders that Sir Hugh should be met by his carriage. What must the wife think of her husband, when she feared that he would be angered by little matters at such a time as this! "Do you think it will make him very unhappy?" Lady Clavering asked.

"He'll be at the station at nine," said Lady Clavering. "They need to send the carriage for him, or the dog cart. He'll be really angry if he's forced to come home in the cab from the pub." Then the older lady left the room and instructed that Sir Hugh should be greeted by his carriage. What must the wife think of her husband if she worried that he'd get upset over such trivial things at a time like this! "Do you think it will make him very unhappy?" Lady Clavering asked.

"Of course it will make him unhappy. How should it be otherwise?"

"Of course it will make him unhappy. How could it be any different?"

"He had said so often that the child would die. He will have got used to the fear."

"He had said so many times that the child would die. He must have gotten used to the fear."

"His grief will be as fresh now as though he had never thought so, and never said so."

"His grief will feel just as fresh now as if he had never thought it or said it."

"He is so hard; and then he has such will, such power. He will thrust it off from him and determine that it shall not oppress him. I know him so well."

"He is so tough; and then he has such determination, such strength. He will push it away from him and decide that it won’t hold him down. I know him so well."

"We should all make some exertion like that in our sorrow, trusting to God's kindness to relieve us. You too, Hermione, should determine also; but not yet, my dear. At first it is better to let sorrow have its way."

"We should all put in some effort like that when we're sad, trusting that God's kindness will help us. You too, Hermione, should decide as well; but not yet, my dear. At first, it's better to let sorrow run its course."

"But he will determine at once. You remember when Meeny went." Meeny had been a little girl who had been born before the boy, and who had died when little more than twelve months old. "He did not expect that; but then he only shook his head, and went out of the room. He has never spoken to me one word of her since that. I think he has forgotten Meeny altogether,—even that she was ever here."

"But he will decide right away. You remember when Meeny left." Meeny had been a little girl born before the boy, who died when she was just over a year old. "He didn't see that coming; he just shook his head and walked out of the room. He hasn't said a single word about her to me since then. I think he has completely forgotten Meeny—even that she was ever here."

"He cannot forget the boy who was his heir."

"He can't forget the boy who was supposed to inherit from him."

"Ah, that is where it is. He will say words to me which would make you weep if you could hear them. Yes, my darling was his heir. Archie will marry now, and will have children, and his boy will be the heir. There will be more division and more quarrels, for Hugh will hate his brother now."

"Ah, that's where it is. He'll say things to me that would make you cry if you could hear them. Yes, my darling was his heir. Archie will get married now and have kids, and his son will be the heir. There will be more division and more arguments because Hugh will hate his brother now."

"I do not understand why."

"I don't understand why."

"Because he is so hard. It is a pity he should ever have married, for he wants nothing that a wife can do for him. He wanted a boy to come after him in the estate, and now that glory has been taken from him. Mrs. Clavering, I often wish that I could die."

"Because he's so tough. It's a shame he ever got married, since he doesn't need anything a wife can offer him. He wanted a son to carry on the family legacy, and now that dream has been snatched away from him. Mrs. Clavering, I often wish I could just die."

It would be bootless here to repeat the words of wise and loving counsel with which the elder of the two ladies endeavoured to comfort the younger, and to make her understand what were the duties which still remained to her, and which, if they were rightly performed, would, in their performance, soften the misery of her lot. Lady Clavering listened with that dull, useless attention which on such occasions sorrow always gives to the prudent counsels of friendship; but she was thinking ever and always of her husband, and watching the moment of his expected return. In her heart she wished that he might not come on that evening. At last, at half-past nine, she exerted herself to send away her visitor.

It would be pointless to repeat the wise and caring advice that the older of the two ladies tried to give the younger one to comfort her and help her understand the duties she still had left. If handled properly, those duties could ease her suffering. Lady Clavering listened with that dull, distracted attention that sorrow often brings to the well-meaning advice of friends, but her mind was focused solely on her husband, eagerly awaiting his return. Deep down, she actually hoped he wouldn’t come home that evening. Finally, at 9:30, she made an effort to send her visitor away.

"He will be here soon, if he comes to-night," Lady Clavering said, "and it will be better that he should find me alone."

"He'll be here soon if he comes tonight," Lady Clavering said, "and it would be better for him to find me alone."

"Will it be better?"

"Will it be better?"

"Yes, yes. Cannot you see how he would frown and shake his head if you were here? I would sooner be alone when he comes. Good-night. You have been very kind to me; but you are always kind. Things are done kindly always at your house, because there is so much love there. You will write to Julia for me. Good-night." Then Mrs. Clavering kissed her and went, thinking as she walked home in the dark to the rectory, how much she had to be thankful in that these words had been true which her poor neighbour had spoken. Her house was full of love.

"Yes, yes. Can't you see how he would frown and shake his head if you were here? I'd rather be alone when he arrives. Goodnight. You've been really kind to me, but you’re always kind. Things are always done with kindness at your place because there's so much love there. You'll write to Julia for me, right? Goodnight." Then Mrs. Clavering kissed her and left, thinking as she walked home in the dark to the rectory about how much she had to be grateful for now that her poor neighbor's words had been true. Her home was full of love.

For the next half hour Lady Clavering sat alone listening with eager ear for the sound of her husband's wheels, and at last she had almost told herself that the hour for his coming had gone by, when she heard the rapid grating on the gravel as the dog-cart was driven up to the door. She ran out on to the corridor, but her heart sank within her as she did so, and she took tightly hold of the balustrade to support herself. For a moment she had thought of running down to meet him;—of trusting to the sadness of the moment to produce in him, if it were but for a minute, something of tender solicitude; but she remembered that the servants would be there, and knew that he would not be soft before them. She remembered also that the housekeeper had received her instructions, and she feared to disarrange the settled programme. So she went back to the open door of the room, that her retreating step might not be heard by him as he should come up to her, and standing there she still listened. The house was silent and her ears were acute with sorrow. She could hear the movement of the old woman as she gently, tremblingly, as Lady Clavering knew, made her way down the hall to meet her master. Sir Hugh of course had learned his child's fate already from the servant who had met him; but it was well that the ceremony of such telling should be performed. She felt the cold air come in from the opened front door, and she heard her husband's heavy quick step as he entered. Then she heard the murmur of Hannah's voice; but the first word she heard was in her husband's tones, "Where is Lady Clavering?" Then the answer was given, and the wife, knowing that he was coming, retreated back to her chair.

For the next half hour, Lady Clavering sat alone, eagerly listening for the sound of her husband's arrival. Just as she was about to convince herself that he wasn’t coming after all, she heard the crunch of the gravel as the dog-cart drove up to the door. She rushed out onto the corridor, but her heart sank, and she gripped the balustrade for support. For a moment, she considered running down to meet him, hoping the sadness of the moment might spark some tenderness in him, even if just for a minute. But then she remembered the servants would be there, and she knew he wouldn’t show any softness in front of them. She also recalled that the housekeeper had been given her instructions, and she didn’t want to disrupt the planned schedule. So, she stepped back to the open door of the room, hoping her retreating footsteps wouldn’t be heard as he approached. Standing there, she continued to listen. The house was quiet, and her ears were sharpened by her sorrow. She could hear the elderly woman's movements as she carefully made her way down the hall to greet her master. Sir Hugh had already learned about their child's fate from the servant who met him, but it was important for the formality of telling to be observed. She felt the cold air rush in from the open front door and heard her husband's heavy, quick steps as he entered. Then, she caught the murmur of Hannah’s voice, but the first word she heard was from her husband: "Where is Lady Clavering?" After the answer was given, knowing he was on his way, she retreated back to her chair.

But still he did not come quite at once. He was pulling off his coat and laying aside his hat and gloves. Then came upon her a feeling that at such a time any other husband and wife would have been at once in each other's arms. And at the moment she thought of all that they had lost. To her her child had been all and everything. To him he had been his heir and the prop of his house. The boy had been the only link that had still bound them together. Now he was gone, and there was no longer any link between them. He was gone and she had nothing left to her. He was gone, and the father was also alone in the world, without any heir and with no prop to his house. She thought of all this as she heard his step coming slowly up the stairs. Slowly he came along the passage, and though she dreaded his coming it almost seemed as though he would never be there.

But he still didn't arrive right away. He was taking off his coat and putting aside his hat and gloves. Then she felt that at a time like this, any other husband and wife would have immediately rushed into each other's arms. In that moment, she reflected on everything they had lost. To her, their child had meant everything. To him, the child had been his heir and the support of his family. The boy had been the only thing keeping them connected. Now he was gone, leaving nothing behind to link them. He was gone, and she felt completely empty. He was gone, and the father was also left alone in the world, without an heir and without support for his family. She thought about all of this as she heard his footsteps slowly making their way up the stairs. He moved slowly along the hallway, and even though she dreaded his arrival, it almost felt like he would never get there.

When he had entered the room she was the first to speak. "Oh, Hugh!" she exclaimed, "oh, Hugh!" He had closed the door before he uttered a word, and then he threw himself into a chair. There were candles near to him and she could see that his countenance also was altered. He had indeed been stricken hard, and his half-stunned face showed the violence of the blow. The harsh, cruel, selfish man had at last been made to suffer. Although he had spoken of it and had expected it, the death of his heir hit him hard, as the rector had said.

When he walked into the room, she was the first to speak. "Oh, Hugh!" she exclaimed, "oh, Hugh!" He had closed the door before saying anything, then slumped into a chair. Candles were nearby, and she could see that his expression had also changed. He had clearly been hit hard, and his dazed face revealed the impact of the blow. The harsh, cruel, selfish man had finally been made to feel pain. Even though he had talked about it and was expecting it, the death of his heir struck him hard, just as the rector had said.

"When did he die?" asked the father.

"When did he die?" the father asked.

"It was past four I think." Then there was again silence, and Lady Clavering went up to her husband and stood close by his shoulder. At last she ventured to put her hand upon him. With all her own misery heavy upon her, she was chiefly thinking at this moment how she might soothe him. She laid her hand upon his shoulder, and by degrees she moved it softly to his breast. Then he raised his own hand and with it moved hers from his person. He did it gently;—but what was the use of such nonsense as that?

"It was past four, I think." Then there was silence again, and Lady Clavering walked up to her husband and stood close to his shoulder. Finally, she dared to place her hand on him. Even with all her own pain weighing her down, she was mostly thinking about how to comfort him. She rested her hand on his shoulder and gradually moved it softly to his chest. Then he lifted his own hand and gently moved hers away from him. He did it softly—but what was the point of such nonsense?

"The Lord giveth," said the wife, "and the Lord taketh away." Hearing this Sir Hugh made with his head a gesture of impatience. "Blessed be the name of the Lord," continued Lady Clavering. Her voice was low and almost trembling, and she repeated the words as though they were a task which she had set herself.

"The Lord gives," said the wife, "and the Lord takes away." Hearing this, Sir Hugh shrugged his head in irritation. "Blessed be the name of the Lord," continued Lady Clavering. Her voice was soft and nearly shaky, and she repeated the words as if they were a challenge she had imposed on herself.

"The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away."
"The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away."
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"That's all very well in its way," said he, "but what's the special use of it now? I hate twaddle. One must bear one's misfortune as one best can. I don't believe that kind of thing ever makes it lighter."

"That's nice and all," he said, "but what's the point of it now? I can't stand pointless talk. You just have to deal with your misfortune the best you can. I don't think that sort of thing ever makes it any easier."

"They say it does, Hugh."

"They say it does, Hugh."

"Ah! they say! Have they ever tried? If you have been living up to that kind of thing all your life, it may be very well;—that is as well at one time as another. But it won't give me back my boy."

"Ah! they say! Have they ever tried? If you've been stuck in that mindset your whole life, that might be fine;—it's just as good at any time. But it won't bring my boy back."

"No, Hugh; he will never come back again; but we may think that he's in Heaven."

"No, Hugh; he’s never coming back; but we can believe that he’s in Heaven."

"If that is enough for you, let it be so. But don't talk to me of it. I don't like it. It doesn't suit me. I had only one, and he has gone. It is always the way." He spoke of the child as having been his—not his and hers. She felt this, and understood the want of affection which it conveyed; but she said nothing of it.

"If that works for you, then fine. But don’t bring it up with me. I’m not a fan of it. It doesn’t fit me. I only had one, and he’s gone now. That’s always how it goes." He referred to the child as if he were his alone—not theirs. She sensed this and understood the lack of affection it implied, but she said nothing about it.

"Oh, Hugh; what could we do? It was not our fault."

"Oh, Hugh; what could we do? It wasn't our fault."

"Who is talking of any fault? I have said nothing as to fault. He was always poor and sickly. The Claverings, generally, have been so strong. Look at myself, and Archie, and my sisters. Well, it cannot be helped. Thinking of it will not bring him back again. You had better tell some one to get me something to eat. I came away, of course, without any dinner."

"Who’s talking about any faults? I didn’t say anything about faults. He’s always been poor and sickly. The Claverings, in general, have been pretty healthy. Just look at me, Archie, and my sisters. Well, it can’t be changed. Worrying about it won’t bring him back. You should probably ask someone to get me something to eat. I left, of course, without having any dinner."

She herself had eaten nothing since the morning, but she neither spoke nor thought of that. She rang the bell, and going out into the passage gave the servant the order on the stairs.

She hadn't eaten anything since morning, but she didn't mention it or think about it. She rang the bell and walked into the hallway to give the servant the order from the stairs.

"It is no good my staying here," he said. "I will go and dress. It is the best not to think of such things,—much the best. People call that heartless, of course, but then people are fools. If I were to sit still, and think of it for a week together, what good could I do?"

"It’s pointless for me to stay here," he said. "I’m going to get ready. It’s better not to think about these things—way better. Of course, people call that heartless, but people are clueless. If I just sat here, thinking about it for a whole week, what good would that do?"

"But how not to think of it? that is the thing."

"But how can you not think about it? That's the issue."

"Women are different, I suppose. I will dress and then go down to the breakfast-room. Tell Saunders to get me a bottle of champagne. You will be better also if you will take a glass of wine."

"Women are just different, I guess. I'll get dressed and then head down to the breakfast room. Please ask Saunders to bring me a bottle of champagne. It would be good for you to have a glass of wine too."

It was the first word he had spoken which showed any care for her, and she was grateful for it. As he arose to go, she came close to him again, and put her hand very gently on his arm. "Hugh," she said, "will you not see him?"

It was the first time he had said something that showed any concern for her, and she appreciated it. As he stood up to leave, she moved closer to him again and gently placed her hand on his arm. "Hugh," she said, "won't you go see him?"

"What good will that do?"

"What will that achieve?"

"I think you would regret it if you were to let them take him away without looking at him. He is so pretty as he lays in his little bed. I thought you would come with me to see him." He was more gentle with her than she had expected, and she led him away to the room which had been their own, and in which the child had died.

"I think you would regret it if you let them take him away without seeing him. He looks so adorable lying in his little bed. I thought you would come with me to see him." He was gentler with her than she expected, and she took him to the room that had been theirs, where the child had passed away.

"Why here?" he said, almost angrily, as he entered.

"Why here?" he said, nearly shouting, as he walked in.

"I have had him here with me since you went."

"I've had him here with me since you left."

"He should not be here now," he said, shuddering. "I wish he had been moved before I came. I will not have this room any more; remember that." She led him up to the foot of the little cot, which stood close by the head of her own bed, and then she removed a handkerchief which lay upon the child's face.

"He shouldn't be here right now," he said, shivering. "I wish he had been relocated before I arrived. I won’t stay in this room anymore; keep that in mind." She guided him to the foot of the small cot, which was positioned near her own bed, and then she took away a handkerchief that was lying on the child's face.

"Oh, Hugh! oh, Hugh!" she said, and, throwing her arms round his neck, she wept violently upon his breast. For a few moments he did not disturb her, but stood looking at his boy's face. "Hugh, Hugh," she repeated, "will you not be kind to me? Do be kind to me. It is not my fault that we are childless."

"Oh, Hugh! oh, Hugh!" she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and crying hard against his chest. For a few moments, he didn’t move but just looked at his son's face. "Hugh, Hugh," she repeated, "won't you be kind to me? Please be kind to me. It’s not my fault that we don't have any children."

Still he endured her for a few moments longer. He spoke no word to her, but he let her remain there, with her head upon his breast.

Still he tolerated her for a few moments longer. He didn’t say anything to her, but he allowed her to stay there, with her head on his chest.

"Dear Hugh, I love you so truly!"

"Dear Hugh, I love you so much!"

"This is nonsense," said he, "sheer nonsense." His voice was low and very hoarse. "Why do you talk of kindness now?"

"This is nonsense," he said, "sheer nonsense." His voice was low and really hoarse. "Why are you talking about kindness now?"

"Because I am so wretched."

"Because I'm so miserable."

"What have I done to make you wretched?"

"What have I done to make you miserable?"

"I do not mean that; but if you will be gentle with me, it will comfort me. Do not leave me here all alone, now my darling has been taken from me."

"I don't mean that; but if you could be kind to me, it would make me feel better. Please don't leave me here all alone, now that my darling has been taken away from me."

Then he shook her from him, not violently, but with a persistent action.

Then he pushed her away from him, not roughly, but with a steady motion.

"Do you mean that you want to go up to town?" he said.

"Are you saying you want to go into town?" he asked.

"Oh, no; not that."

"Oh no; not that."

"Then what is it you want? Where would you live, if not here?"

"Then what do you want? Where would you live if not here?"

"Anywhere you please, only that you should stay with me."

"Wherever you want, just make sure to stay with me."

"All that is nonsense. I wonder that you should talk of such things now. Come away from this, and let me go to my room. All this is trash and nonsense, and I hate it." She put back with careful hands the piece of cambric which she had moved, and then, seating herself on a chair, wept violently, with her hands closed upon her face. "That comes of bringing me here," he said. "Get up, Hermione. I will not have you so foolish. Get up, I say. I will have the room closed till the men come."

"That's all nonsense. I can't believe you're talking about this now. Just leave this behind, and let me go to my room. This is all trash and nonsense, and I can't stand it." She carefully placed the piece of fabric she had moved back in its place, then sat down in a chair and cried hard, her hands covering her face. "This is what happens when you bring me here," he said. "Get up, Hermione. I won’t allow you to be so silly. Get up, I mean it. I'm going to close the room until the guys arrive."

"Oh, no!"

"Oh, no!"

"Get up, I say, and come away." Then she rose, and followed him out of the chamber, and when he went to change his clothes she returned to the room in which he had found her. There she sat and wept, while he went down and dined and drank alone. But the old housekeeper brought her up a morsel of food and a glass of wine, saying that her master desired that she would take it.

"Get up, I say, and come with me." Then she stood up and followed him out of the room, and when he went to change his clothes, she went back to the place where he had found her. There she sat and cried, while he went downstairs and had dinner and drank alone. But the old housekeeper brought her a bit of food and a glass of wine, saying that her master wanted her to have it.

"I will not leave you, my lady, till you have done so," said Hannah. "To fast so long must be bad always."

"I won't leave you, my lady, until you do," said Hannah. "Fasting for that long can't be good, always."

Then she eat the food, and drank a drop of wine, and allowed the old woman to take her away to the bed that had been prepared for her. Of her husband she saw no more for four days. On the next morning a note was brought to her, in which Sir Hugh told her that he had returned to London. It was necessary, he said, that he should see his lawyer and his brother. He and Archie would return for the funeral. With reference to that he had already given orders.

Then she ate the food, took a sip of wine, and let the old woman lead her to the bed that had been prepared for her. She didn’t see her husband again for four days. The next morning, she received a note from Sir Hugh, informing her that he had gone back to London. He said it was important for him to meet with his lawyer and his brother. He and Archie would come back for the funeral. He had already made arrangements concerning that.

During the next three days, and till her husband's return, Lady Clavering remained at the rectory, and in the comfort of Mrs. Clavering's presence she almost felt that it would be well for her if those days could be prolonged. But she knew the hour at which her husband would return, and she took care to be at home when he arrived. "You will come and see him?" she said to the rector, as she left the parsonage. "You will come at once;—in an hour or two?" Mr. Clavering remembered the circumstances of his last visit to the house, and the declaration he had then made that he would not return there. But all that could not now be considered.

During the next three days, until her husband came back, Lady Clavering stayed at the rectory, and being in the comfort of Mrs. Clavering's presence, she almost wished those days could last longer. But she knew when her husband would return, and she made sure to be home when he arrived. "You'll come and see him?" she asked the rector as she was leaving the parsonage. "You will come right away—in an hour or two?" Mr. Clavering remembered the circumstances of his last visit to the house and the promise he had made not to come back. But all that couldn’t be thought about now.

"Yes," he said, "I will come across this evening. But you had better tell him, so that he need not be troubled to see me if he would rather be alone."

"Yes," he said, "I'll come over this evening. But you should let him know, so he doesn't feel like he needs to see me if he'd prefer to be alone."

"Oh, he will see you. Of course he will see you. And you will not remember that he ever offended you?"

"Oh, he will see you. Of course, he will see you. And you won't remember that he ever hurt you?"

Mrs. Clavering had written both to Julia and to Harry, and the day of the funeral had been settled. Harry had already communicated his intention of coming down; and Lady Ongar had replied to Mrs. Clavering's letter, saying that she could not now offer to go to Clavering Park, but that if her sister would go elsewhere with her,—to some place, perhaps, on the sea-side,—she would be glad to accompany her; and she used many arguments in her letter to show that such an arrangement as this had better be made.

Mrs. Clavering had written to both Julia and Harry, and the day of the funeral had been set. Harry had already shared his plans to come down; and Lady Ongar responded to Mrs. Clavering’s letter, saying she couldn’t offer to go to Clavering Park anymore, but if her sister would go somewhere else with her—perhaps to a seaside place—she would be happy to join her; and she provided several reasons in her letter to suggest that this kind of arrangement would be better.

"You will be with my sister," she had said; "and she will understand why I do not write to her myself, and will not think that it comes from coldness." This had been written before Lady Ongar saw Harry Clavering.

"You'll be with my sister," she had said; "and she will understand why I can't write to her myself, and won't think it's because I'm being cold." This had been written before Lady Ongar met Harry Clavering.

Mr. Clavering, when he got to the great house, was immediately shown into the room in which the baronet and his younger brother were sitting. They had, some time since, finished dinner, but the decanters were still on the table before them. "Hugh," said the rector, walking up to his elder nephew, briskly, "I grieve for you. I grieve for you from the bottom of my heart."

Mr. Clavering, when he arrived at the big house, was promptly taken to the room where the baronet and his younger brother were sitting. They had finished dinner a while ago, but the decanters were still on the table in front of them. "Hugh," said the rector, walking up to his older nephew with energy, "I feel for you. I feel for you sincerely."

"Yes," said Hugh, "it has been a heavy blow. Sit down, uncle. There is a clean glass there; or Archie will fetch you one." Then Archie looked out a clean glass and passed the decanter; but of this the rector took no direct notice.

"Yeah," said Hugh, "it’s been a tough hit. Sit down, uncle. There’s a clean glass over there; or Archie can grab you one." Then Archie found a clean glass and passed the decanter; but the rector didn’t pay any direct attention to it.

"It has been a blow, my poor boy,—a heavy blow," said the rector. "None heavier could have fallen. But our sorrows come from Heaven, as do our blessings, and must be accepted."

"It has been a shock, my poor boy—a tough one," said the rector. "None could be heavier. But our troubles come from Heaven, just like our blessings, and we have to accept them."

"We are all like grass," said Archie, "and must be cut down in our turns." Archie, in saying this, intended to put on his best behaviour. He was as sincere as he knew how to be.

"We're all like grass," Archie said, "and we have to be cut down in our turns." By saying this, Archie meant to show his best behavior. He was as sincere as he knew how to be.

"Come, Archie, none of that," said his brother. "It is my uncle's trade."

"Come on, Archie, cut it out," said his brother. "It's my uncle's job."

"Hugh," said the rector, "unless you can think of it so, you will find no comfort."

"Hugh," said the rector, "unless you can see it that way, you won't find any comfort."

"And I expect none, so there is an end of that. Different people think of these things differently, you know, and it is of no more use for me to bother you than it is for you to bother me. My boy has gone, and I know that he will not come back to me. I shall never have another, and it is hard to bear. But, meaning no offence to you, I would sooner be left to bear it in my own way. If I were to talk about the grass as Archie did just now, it would be humbug, and I hate humbug. No offence to you. Take some wine, uncle."

"And I don’t expect any, so that’s that. Different people see these things in their own ways, you know, and it’s pointless for me to trouble you just as much as it’s pointless for you to trouble me. My son is gone, and I know he’s not coming back. I’ll never have another, and it’s tough to deal with. But, with no disrespect to you, I’d rather handle it on my own. If I started talking about the grass like Archie just did, it would feel fake, and I can’t stand fake. No offense to you. Have some wine, uncle."

But the rector could not drink wine in that presence, and therefore he escaped as soon as he could. He spoke one word of intended comfort to Lady Clavering, and then returned to the rectory.

But the rector couldn't drink wine around them, so he left as quickly as he could. He said one word of intended comfort to Lady Clavering and then went back to the rectory.

 

 

CHAPTER XXI.

YES; WRONG;—CERTAINLY WRONG.

Harry Clavering had heard the news of his little cousin's death before he went to Bolton Street to report the result of his negotiation with the count. His mother's letter with the news had come to him in the morning, and on the same evening he called on Lady Ongar. She also had then received Mrs. Clavering's letter, and knew what had occurred at the park. Harry found her alone, having asked the servant whether Madame Gordeloup was with his mistress. Had such been the case he would have gone away, and left his message untold.

Harry Clavering had heard about his little cousin's death before he went to Bolton Street to update the count on his negotiations. He had received his mother’s letter with the news that morning, and that evening he visited Lady Ongar. She also had received Mrs. Clavering's letter and was aware of what happened at the park. Harry found her alone after asking the servant if Madame Gordeloup was with her. If she had been, he would have left without delivering his message.

As he entered the room his mind was naturally full of the tidings from Clavering. Count Pateroff and his message had lost some of their importance through this other event, and the emptiness of the childless house was the first subject of conversation between him and Lady Ongar. "I pity my sister greatly," said she. "I feel for her as deeply as I should have done had nothing occurred to separate us;—but I cannot feel for him."

As he walked into the room, his mind was naturally filled with news from Clavering. Count Pateroff and his message had become less significant because of this other event, and the emptiness of the childless house was the first topic of discussion between him and Lady Ongar. "I really feel for my sister," she said. "I empathize with her just as much as I would have if nothing had happened to separate us;—but I can’t feel for him."

"I do," said Harry.

"I do," Harry said.

"He is your cousin, and perhaps has been your friend?"

"He is your cousin and maybe he's been your friend?"

"No, not especially. He and I have never pulled well together; but still I pity him deeply."

"No, not really. He and I have never clicked well together; but still, I feel really sorry for him."

"He is not my cousin, but I know him better than you do, Harry. He will not feel much himself, and his sorrow will be for his heir, not for his son. He is a man whose happiness does not depend on the life or death of any one. He likes some people, as he once liked me; but I do not think that he ever loved any human being. He will get over it, and he will simply wish that Hermy may die, that he may marry another wife. Harry, I know him so well!"

"He’s not my cousin, but I know him better than you, Harry. He won't be feeling much, and his sorrow will be for his heir, not for his son. He’s a guy whose happiness doesn’t depend on anyone’s life or death. He likes some people, like he once liked me, but I don’t think he’s ever loved anyone. He’ll get over it, and he’ll just wish that Hermy dies so he can marry someone else. Harry, I know him so well!"

"Archie will marry now," said Harry.

"Archie is getting married now," said Harry.

"Yes; if he can get any one to have him. There are very few men who can't get wives, but I can fancy Archie Clavering to be one of them. He has not humility enough to ask the sort of girl who would be glad to take him. Now, with his improved prospects, he will want a royal princess or something not much short of it. Money, rank, and blood might have done before, but he'll expect youth, beauty, and wit now, as well as the other things. He may marry after all, for he is just the man to walk out of a church some day with the cookmaid under his arm as his wife."

"Yes, if he can find anyone willing to have him. There are very few men who can’t get wives, but I can see Archie Clavering being one of them. He doesn’t have enough humility to ask the kind of girl who would actually want him. Now that his prospects have improved, he’ll be looking for a royal princess or something close to that. Money, status, and lineage might have been enough before, but he’ll now expect youth, beauty, and charm, along with everything else. He might marry after all, since he’s exactly the type to walk out of a church one day with the maid as his wife."

"Perhaps he may find something between a princess and a cookmaid."

"Maybe he’ll find someone who’s a mix of a princess and a cook."

"I hope, for your sake, he may not;—neither a princess nor a cookmaid, nor anything between."

"I hope, for your sake, he doesn't;—neither a princess nor a maid, nor anything in between."

"He has my leave to marry to-morrow, Lady Ongar. If I had my wish, Hugh should have his house full of children."

"He has my permission to get married tomorrow, Lady Ongar. If it were up to me, Hugh would have a house full of kids."

"Of course that is the proper thing to say, Harry."

"Of course, that's the right thing to say, Harry."

"I won't stand that from you, Lady Ongar. What I say, I mean; and no one knows that better than you."

"I won't put up with that from you, Lady Ongar. When I say something, I mean it; and no one knows that better than you."

"Won't you, Harry? From whom, then, if not from me? But come, I will do you justice, and believe you to be simple enough to wish anything of the kind. The sort of castle in the air which you build, is not one to be had by inheritance, but to be taken by storm. You must fight for it."

"Won't you, Harry? If not from me, then from whom? But come on, I’ll give you your due and believe you really want something like that. The kind of dreams you're building aren't something you inherit; they're something you have to go after aggressively. You have to fight for it."

"Or work for it."

"Or earn it."

"Or win it in some way off your own bat; and no lord ever sat prouder in his castle than you sit in those that you build from day to day in your imagination. And you sally forth and do all manner of magnificent deeds. You help distressed damsels,—poor me, for instance; and you attack enormous dragons;—shall I say that Sophie Gordeloup is the latest dragon?—and you wish well to your enemies, such as Hugh and Archie; and you cut down enormous forests, which means your coming miracles as an engineer;—and then you fall gloriously in love. When is that last to be, Harry?"

"Or win it yourself in some way; and no lord ever sat prouder in his castle than you sit in the ones you build in your imagination every day. You go out and do all sorts of amazing things. You help distressed damsels—like me, for instance; you fight huge dragons—should I say that Sophie Gordeloup is the latest dragon?—and you wish the best for your enemies, like Hugh and Archie; and you clear massive forests, which represents your upcoming miracles as an engineer;—and then you fall head over heels in love. When will that last part happen, Harry?"

"I suppose, according to all precedent, that must be done with the distressed damsel," he said,—fool that he was.

"I guess, like it's always been done before, that has to be taken care of with the troubled lady," he said—what a fool he was.

"No, Harry, no; you shall take your young fresh generous heart to a better market than that; not but that the distressed damsel will ever remember what might once have been."

"No, Harry, no; you should take your young, fresh, generous heart to a better place than that; it's just that the distressed girl will always remember what could have been."

He knew that he was playing on the edge of a precipice,—that he was fluttering as a moth round a candle. He knew that it behoved him now at once to tell her all his tale as to Stratton and Florence Burton;—that if he could tell it now, the pang would be over and the danger gone. But he did not tell it. Instead of telling it he thought of Lady Ongar's beauty, of his own early love, of what might have been his had he not gone to Stratton. I think he thought, if not of her wealth, yet of the power and place which would have been his were it now open to him to ask her for her hand. When he had declared that he did not want his cousin's inheritance, he had spoken the simple truth. He was not covetous of another's money. Were Archie to marry as many wives as Henry, and have as many children as Priam, it would be no offence to him. His desires did not lie in that line. But in this other case, the woman before him who would so willingly have endowed him with all that she possessed, had been loved by him before he had ever seen Florence Burton. In all his love for Florence,—so he now told himself, but so told himself falsely,—he had ever remembered that Julia Brabazon had been his first love, the love whom he had loved with all his heart. But things had gone with him most unfortunately,—with a misfortune that had never been paralleled. It was thus he was thinking instead of remembering that now was the time in which his tale should be told.

He knew he was on the edge of a cliff, like a moth drawn to a flame. He realized he needed to tell her everything about Stratton and Florence Burton right away; if he could just get it out, the pain would be over and the danger would disappear. But he didn’t say anything. Instead, he thought about Lady Ongar's beauty, his early love for her, and what might have been if he hadn’t gone to Stratton. He considered, if not her wealth, then the status and opportunity he could have had if he could now ask for her hand. When he had said he didn’t want his cousin’s inheritance, he had been completely honest. He wasn’t interested in someone else’s money. If Archie were to marry as many wives as Henry and have as many kids as Priam, it wouldn’t bother him. His desires didn’t go that way. But in this case—this woman in front of him who would have happily shared everything she had—he had loved her long before he ever met Florence Burton. In all his love for Florence—though now he told himself otherwise, and incorrectly—he had always remembered that Julia Brabazon was his first love, the one he had loved with all his heart. But things had gone terribly wrong for him, with a misfortune that had never been matched. This was how he was thinking instead of realizing that now was the time to share his story.

Lady Ongar, however, soon carried him away from the actual brink of the precipice. "But how about the dragon," said she, "or rather about the dragon's brother, at whom you were bound to go and tilt on my behalf? Have you tilted, or are you a recreant knight?"

Lady Ongar, however, quickly pulled him back from the edge of the cliff. "But what about the dragon," she asked, "or more specifically, the dragon's brother, whom you promised to confront on my behalf? Have you faced him, or are you just a cowardly knight?"

"I have tilted," said he, "but the he-dragon professes that he will not regard himself as killed. In other words he declares that he will see you."

"I've tried," he said, "but the male dragon insists that he won't see himself as defeated. In other words, he says he will meet you."

"That he will see me?" said Lady Ongar, and as she spoke there came an angry spot on each cheek. "Does he send me that message as a threat?"

"That he will see me?" Lady Ongar said, and as she spoke, angry spots appeared on each cheek. "Is he sending me that message as a threat?"

"He does not send it as a threat, but I think he partly means it so."

"He doesn't send it as a threat, but I think he partly means it that way."

"He will find, Harry, that I will not see him; and that should he force himself into my presence, I shall know how to punish such an outrage. If he sent me any message, let me know it."

"He’ll find, Harry, that I won’t see him; and if he forces his way into my presence, I’ll know how to deal with such an outrage. If he sends me any message, let me know."

"To tell the truth he was most unwilling to speak to me at all, though he was anxious to be civil to me. When I had inquired for him some time in vain, he came to me with another man, and asked me to dinner. So I went, and as there were four of us, of course I could not speak to him then. He still had the other man, a foreigner—"

"Honestly, he really didn’t want to talk to me at all, even though he was trying to be polite. After I had asked about him for a while without any luck, he came over with another guy and invited me to dinner. So I went, and since there were four of us, I couldn’t talk to him then. He still had the other guy, a non-native"

"Colonel Schmoff, perhaps?"

"Colonel Schmoff, maybe?"

"Yes; Colonel Schmoff. He kept Colonel Schmoff by him, so as to guard him from being questioned."

"Yes, Colonel Schmoff. He kept Colonel Schmoff close to him to protect him from being questioned."

"That is so like him. Everything he does he does with some design,—with some little plan. Well, Harry, you might have ignored Colonel Schmoff for what I should have cared."

"That’s so typical of him. Everything he does, he does with a purpose—there’s always some little plan behind it. Well, Harry, you could have completely overlooked Colonel Schmoff, and I wouldn’t have minded at all."

"I got the count to come out into another room at last, and then he was very angry,—with me, you know,—and talked of what he would do to men who interfered with him."

"I finally got the count to come into another room, and then he was really angry—with me, of course—and talked about what he would do to anyone who got in his way."

"You will not quarrel with him, Harry? Promise me that there shall be no nonsense of that sort,—no fighting."

"You won’t argue with him, will you, Harry? Promise me there won’t be any nonsense like that—no fighting."

"Oh, no; we were friends again very soon. But he bade me tell you that there was something important for him to say and for you to hear, which was no concern of mine, and which required an interview."

"Oh, no; we became friends again pretty quickly. But he asked me to tell you that he had something important to say and you needed to hear it, which wasn’t my business, and it needed a meeting."

"I do not believe him, Harry."

"I don't trust him, Harry."

"And he said that he had once been very courteous to you—"

"And he said that he had once been very kind to you—

"Yes; once insolent,—and once courteous. I have forgiven the one for the other."

"Yeah; I was once rude—and once polite. I've forgiven one for the other."

"He then went on to say that you made him a poor return for his civility by shutting your door in his face, but that he did not doubt you would think better of it when you had heard his message. Therefore, he said, he should call again. That, Lady Ongar, was the whole of it."

"He then said that you didn’t repay his kindness well by shutting the door in his face, but he was sure you would reconsider once you heard his message. So, he mentioned that he would come back. That, Lady Ongar, was everything."

"Shall I tell you what his intention was, Harry?" Again her face became red as she asked this question; but the colour which now came to her cheeks was rather that of shame than of anger.

"Should I tell you what his intention was, Harry?" Again her face turned red as she asked this question; but the color that came to her cheeks now was more from shame than from anger.

"What was his intention?"

"What was his goal?"

"To make you believe that I am in his power; to make you think that he has been my lover; to lower me in your eyes, so that you might believe all that others have believed,—all that Hugh Clavering has pretended to believe. That has been his object, Harry, and perhaps you will tell me what success he has had."

"To make you think that I'm under his control; to convince you that he has been my lover; to make you look down on me, so you'll believe everything others have thought—all the things Hugh Clavering has falsely claimed to believe. That has been his goal, Harry, and maybe you can tell me how successful he has been."

"Lady Ongar!"

"Ms. Ongar!"

"You know the old story, that the drop which is ever dropping will wear the stone. And after all why should your faith in me be as hard even as a stone?"

"You know the old saying, that a constant drip will wear down a stone. So why should your faith in me be as hard as a rock?"

"Do you believe that what he said had any such effect?"

"Do you think what he said had any effect like that?"

"It is very hard to look into another person's heart; and the dearer and nearer that heart is to your own, the greater, I think, is the difficulty. I know that man's heart,—what he calls his heart; but I don't know yours."

"It’s really difficult to see into someone else’s heart; and the closer that heart is to your own, the harder it seems. I understand a man’s heart—what he calls his heart; but I don’t know yours."

For a moment or two Clavering made no answer, and then, when he did speak, he went back from himself to the count.

For a moment or two, Clavering remained silent, and then, when he finally spoke, he shifted his focus from himself to the count.

"If what you surmise of him be true, he must be a very devil. He cannot be a man—"

"If what you think about him is true, he must be a total monster. He can't be a man—

"Man or devil, what matters which he be? Which is the worst, Harry, and what is the difference? The Fausts of this day want no Mephistopheles to teach them guile or to harden their hearts."

"Man or devil, what does it matter which he is? What's worse, Harry, and what’s the difference? The Fausts of today don’t need a Mephistopheles to teach them deceit or to harden their hearts."

"I do not believe that there are such men. There may be one."

"I don't believe there are any such men. There might be one."

"One, Harry! What was Lord Ongar? What is your cousin Hugh? What is this Count Pateroff? Are they not all of the same nature; hard as stone, desirous simply of indulging their own appetites, utterly without one generous feeling, incapable even of the idea of caring for any one? Is it not so? In truth this count is the best of the three I have named. With him a woman would stand a better chance than with either of the others."

"One, Harry! What was Lord Ongar? What about your cousin Hugh? What’s up with this Count Pateroff? Aren’t they all the same? Cold as stone, only interested in satisfying their own desires, completely lacking in any kind of kindness, incapable of caring for anyone? Isn’t that right? Honestly, this count is the best of the three I mentioned. A woman would have a better chance with him than with either of the others."

"Nevertheless, if that was his motive, he is a devil."

"Still, if that was his reason, he's a devil."

"He shall be a devil if you say so. He shall be anything you please, so long as he has not made you think evil of me."

"He can be a devil if that's what you say. He can be whatever you want, as long as he hasn't made you think badly of me."

"No; he has not done that."

"No, he hasn't done that."

"Then I don't care what he has done, or what he may do. You would not have me see him, would you?" This she asked with a sudden energy, throwing herself forward from her seat with her elbows on the table, and resting her face on her hands, as she had already done more than once when he had been there; so that the attitude, which became her well, was now customary in his eyes.

"Then I don’t care what he’s done or what he might do. You wouldn’t want me to see him, would you?" She asked this with sudden intensity, leaning forward from her seat with her elbows on the table and resting her face in her hands, just like she had done multiple times when he was there; this position, which suited her well, had now become familiar to him.

"You will hardly be guided by my opinion in such a matter."

"You probably won't take my opinion into account in this situation."

"By whose, then, will I be guided? Nay, Harry, since you put me to a promise, I will make the promise. I will be guided by your opinion. If you bid me see him, I will do it,—though, I own, it would be distressing to me."

"Then by whose will should I be guided? No, Harry, since you’ve asked me to promise, I’ll make that promise. I’ll follow your opinion. If you tell me to see him, I will do it—although, I admit, it would be upsetting for me."

"Why should you see him, if you do not wish it?"

"Why would you want to see him if you don't want to?"

"I know no reason. In truth there is no reason. What he says about Lord Ongar is simply some part of his scheme. You see what his scheme is, Harry?"

"I don't know why. Honestly, there isn't any reason. What he says about Lord Ongar is just part of his plan. Do you see what his plan is, Harry?"

"What is his scheme?"

"What's his plan?"

"Simply this—that I should be frightened into becoming his wife. My darling bosom friend Sophie, who, as I take it, has not quite managed to come to satisfactory terms with her brother,—and I have no doubt her price for assistance has been high,—has informed me more than once that her brother desires to do me so much honour. The count, perhaps, thinks that he can manage such a bagatelle without any aid from his sister; and my dearest Sophie seems to feel that she can do better with me herself in my widowed state, than if I were to take another husband. They are so kind and so affectionate; are they not?"

"Basically, he wants to scare me into becoming his wife. My dear friend Sophie, who I think hasn’t quite reached a good understanding with her brother—and I’m sure her price for help has been steep—has told me more than once that her brother wants to honor me. The count probably thinks he can handle such a trivial matter on his own, without his sister's help; and my sweetest Sophie seems to believe she can do better by me in my widowhood than if I were to marry someone else. They’re so kind and caring, aren’t they?"

At this moment tea was brought in, and Clavering sat for a time silent with his cup in his hand. She, the meanwhile, had resumed the old position with her face upon her hands, which she had abandoned when the servant entered the room, and was now sitting looking at him as he sipped his tea with his eyes averted from her. "I cannot understand," at last he said, "why you should persist in your intimacy with such a woman."

At that moment, tea was served, and Clavering sat quietly for a while with his cup in hand. She, meanwhile, had returned to her previous position with her face resting on her hands, which she had given up when the servant walked in, and was now sitting there watching him as he sipped his tea, his eyes turned away from her. "I just can’t understand," he finally said, "why you insist on being close to someone like her."

"You have not thought about it, Harry, or you would understand it. It is, I think, very easily understood."

"You haven't thought about it, Harry, or you'd get it. I think it's pretty easy to understand."

"You know her to be treacherous, false, vulgar, covetous, unprincipled. You cannot like her. You say she is a dragon."

"You know she's deceitful, insincere, crude, greedy, and unethical. You can't like her. You say she's a dragon."

"A dragon to you, I said."

"A dragon to you, I said."

"You cannot pretend that she is a lady, and yet you put up with her society."

"You can't pretend she's a lady, yet you tolerate her company."

"Exactly. And now tell me what you would have me do."

"Exactly. Now tell me what you want me to do."

"I would have you part from her."

"I want you to leave her."

"But how? It is so easy to say, part. Am I to bar my door against her when she has given me no offence? Am I to forget that she did me great service, when I sorely needed such services? Can I tell her to her face that she is all these things that you say of her, and that therefore I will for the future dispense with her company? Or do you believe that people in this world associate only with those they love and esteem?"

"But how? It's so easy to say, part. Am I supposed to shut her out when she hasn't wronged me? Am I meant to forget that she helped me a lot when I really needed it? Can I tell her to her face that she's everything you're saying about her, and that’s why I’ll no longer spend time with her? Or do you think people in this world only hang out with those they love and respect?"

"I would not have one for my intimate friend whom I did not love and esteem."

"I wouldn’t want one for my close friend if I didn’t love and respect them."

"But, Harry, suppose that no one loved and esteemed you; that you had no home down at Clavering with a father that admires you and a mother that worships you; no sisters that think you to be almost perfect, no comrades with whom you can work with mutual regard and emulation, no self-confidence, no high hopes of your own, no power of choosing companions whom you can esteem and love;—suppose with you it was Sophie Gordeloup or none,—how would it be with you then?"

"But, Harry, imagine if no one loved and valued you; that you had no home in Clavering with a father who admires you and a mother who adores you; no sisters who think you're almost perfect, no friends you can work with and respect, no self-confidence, no big dreams of your own, no ability to choose friends you can respect and love;—imagine if it was Sophie Gordeloup or nothing for you—how would you feel then?"

His heart must have been made of stone if this had not melted it. He got up and coming round to her stood over her. "Julia," he said, "it is not so with you."

His heart must have been made of stone if this hadn’t softened it. He got up, walked around to her, and stood over her. "Julia," he said, "it's not like that for you."

"But it is so with Julia," she said. "That is the truth. How am I better than her, and why should I not associate with her?"

"But that's how it is with Julia," she said. "That's the truth. How am I any better than her, and why shouldn't I hang out with her?"

"Better than her! As women you are poles asunder."

"Better than her! As women, you are completely different."

"But as dragons," she said, smiling, "we come together."

"But as dragons," she said with a smile, "we unite."

"Do you mean that you have no one to love you?"

"Are you saying that you have no one who loves you?"

"Yes, Harry; that is just what I do mean. I have none to love me. In playing my cards I have won my stakes in money and rank, but have lost the amount ten times told in affection, friendship, and that general unpronounced esteem which creates the fellowship of men and women in the world. I have a carriage and horses, and am driven about with grand servants; and people, as they see me, whisper and say that is Lady Ongar, whom nobody knows. I can see it in their eyes till I fancy that I can hear their words."

"Yes, Harry; that's exactly what I mean. I have no one who loves me. In playing my cards, I've gained my wealth and status, but I've lost so much more in love, friendship, and that unspoken respect that builds connections between people in the world. I have a carriage and horses, and I'm driven around by fancy servants; and as people see me, they whisper and say, 'That's Lady Ongar, who nobody really knows.' I can see it in their eyes, and I feel like I can hear their words."

"But it is all false."

"But it's all fake."

"What is false? It is not false that I have deserved this. I have done that which has made me a fitting companion for such a one as Sophie Gordeloup, though I have not done that which perhaps these people think."

"What is false? It's not false that I deserve this. I have done things that make me a suitable match for someone like Sophie Gordeloup, even if I haven't done what these people might assume."

He paused again before he spoke, still standing near her on the rug. "Lady Ongar—" he said.

He paused again before he spoke, still standing near her on the rug. "Lady Ongar—" he said.

"Nay, Harry; not Lady Ongar when we are together thus. Let me feel that I have one friend who can dare to call me by my name,—from whose mouth I shall be pleased to hear my name. You need not fear that I shall think that it means too much. I will not take it as meaning what it used to mean."

"Nah, Harry; not Lady Ongar when we’re together like this. Let me feel that I have one friend who can dare to call me by my name—someone from whom I would actually like to hear my name. You don’t have to worry that I’ll think it means too much. I won’t take it as meaning what it used to mean."

He did not know how to go on with his speech, or in truth what to say to her. Florence Burton was still present to his mind, and from minute to minute he told himself that he would not become a villain. But now it had come to that with him, that he would have given all that he had in the world that he had never gone to Stratton. He sat down by her in silence, looking away from her at the fire, swearing to himself that he would not become a villain, and yet wishing, almost wishing, that he had the courage to throw his honour overboard. At last, half turning round towards her he took her hand, or rather took her first by the wrist till he could possess himself of her hand. As he did so he touched her hair and her cheek, and she let her hand drop till it rested in his. "Julia," he said, "what can I do to comfort you?" She did not answer him, but looked away from him as she sat, across the table into vacancy. "Julia," he said again, "is there anything that will comfort you?" But still she did not answer him.

He didn’t know how to continue his speech or really what to say to her. Florence Burton was still on his mind, and every moment, he reminded himself that he wouldn’t become a bad person. But now it had come to this, and he would have given anything to take back going to Stratton. He sat down next to her in silence, turning his gaze from her to the fire, promising himself that he wouldn’t turn into a villain, while also almost wishing he had the guts to give up his honor. Finally, turning slightly toward her, he took her wrist first until he could hold her hand. As he did, he brushed against her hair and her cheek, and she let her hand fall into his. “Julia,” he said, “what can I do to make you feel better?” She didn’t respond but looked past him, across the table into nothingness. “Julia,” he asked again, “is there anything that will comfort you?” But she still didn’t reply.

He understood it all as well as the reader will understand it. He knew how it was with her, and was aware that he was at this instant false almost equally to her and to Florence. He knew that the question he had asked was one to which there could be made a true and satisfactory answer, but that his safety lay in the fact that that answer was all but impossible for her to give. Could she say, "Yes, you can comfort me. Tell me that you yet love me, and I will be comforted?" But he had not designed to bring her into such difficulty as this. He had not intended to be cruel. He had drifted into treachery unawares, and was torturing her, not because he was wicked, but because he was weak. He had held her hand now for some minute or two, but still she did not speak to him. Then he raised it and pressed it warmly to his lips.

He understood everything as well as the reader will. He knew how she felt and realized that, in this moment, he was being false both to her and to Florence. He recognized that the question he had asked could actually have a true and satisfying answer, but he was safe because it was almost impossible for her to provide that answer. Could she say, “Yes, you can comfort me. Tell me that you still love me, and I’ll feel better?” But he hadn’t meant to put her in such a tough spot. He hadn’t meant to be cruel. He had unintentionally drifted into betrayal and was hurting her, not because he was evil, but because he was weak. He had been holding her hand for a minute or two, but she still didn’t speak to him. Then he lifted it and pressed it warmly to his lips.

"No, Harry," she said, jumping from her seat and drawing her hand rapidly from him; "no; it shall not be like that. Let it be Lady Ongar again if the sound of the other name brings back too closely the memory of other days. Let it be Lady Ongar again. I can understand that it will be better." As she spoke she walked away from him across the room, and he followed her.

"No, Harry," she said, jumping out of her seat and quickly pulling her hand away from him. "No, it won’t be like that. Let’s just call it Lady Ongar again if the other name brings back too many memories of the past. Let’s stick with Lady Ongar. I can see that it will be better." As she spoke, she walked across the room, and he followed her.

"Are you angry?" he asked her.

"Are you upset?" he asked her.

"No, Harry; not angry. How should I be angry with you who alone are left to me of my old friends? But, Harry, you must think for me, and spare me in my difficulty."

"No, Harry; I’m not angry. How could I be angry with you, the only one left of my old friends? But, Harry, you need to think for me and help me out in this tough time."

"Spare you, Julia?"

"Spare you, Julia?"

"Yes, Harry, spare me; you must be good to me and considerate, and make yourself like a brother to me. But people will know you are not a brother, and you must remember all that, for my sake. But you must not leave me or desert me. Anything that people might say would be better than that."

"Yes, Harry, please, you have to be nice to me and look out for me, and treat me like a brother. But people will see that you aren’t really a brother, and you have to keep that in mind for my sake. But you can’t leave me or abandon me. Anything people might say would be better than that."

"Was I wrong to kiss your hand?"

"Was I wrong to kiss your hand?"

"Yes, wrong, certainly wrong;—that is, not wrong, but unmindful."

"Yes, that's incorrect, definitely incorrect;—that is, not incorrect, but thoughtless."

"I did it," he said, "because I love you." And as he spoke the tears stood in both his eyes.

"I did it," he said, "because I love you." And as he spoke, tears filled both of his eyes.

"Yes; you love me, and I you; but not with love that may show itself in that form. That was the old love, which I threw away, and which has been lost. That was at an end when I—jilted you. I am not angry; but you will remember that that love exists no longer? You will remember that, Harry?"

"Yes; you love me, and I love you; but not in a way that can be expressed like that. That was the old kind of love, which I let go of and which is gone for good. It ended when I—broke your heart. I’m not upset; but you do remember that love is no longer there, right? You remember that, Harry?"

He sat himself down in a chair in a far part of the room, and two tears coursed their way down his cheeks. She stood over him and watched him as he wept. "I did not mean to make you sad," she said. "Come, we will be sad no longer. I understand it all. I know how it is with you. The old love is lost, but we will not the less be friends." Then he rose suddenly from his chair, and taking her in his arms, and holding her closely to his bosom, pressed his lips to hers.

He sat down in a chair in a remote corner of the room, and two tears streamed down his cheeks. She stood over him, watching as he cried. "I didn't mean to make you sad," she said. "Come on, let's not be sad anymore. I get it. I know what you're going through. The old love is gone, but we can still be friends." Then he suddenly got up from his chair, took her in his arms, held her tightly against him, and kissed her.

He was so quick in this that she had not the power, even if she had the wish, to restrain him. But she struggled in his arms, and held her face aloof from him as she gently rebuked his passion. "No, Harry, no; not so," she said, "it must not be so."

He was so fast in this that she didn't have the strength, even if she wanted to, to stop him. But she struggled in his arms and turned her face away from him as she softly criticized his desire. "No, Harry, no; not like this," she said, "it can't be like this."

"Yes, Julia, yes; it shall be so; ever so,—always so." And he was still holding her in his arms, when the door opened, and with stealthy, cat-like steps Sophie Gordeloup entered the room. Harry immediately retreated from his position, and Lady Ongar turned upon her friend, and glared upon her with angry eyes.

"Yes, Julia, yes; it will be so; always will be." And he was still holding her in his arms when the door opened, and with stealthy, cat-like steps, Sophie Gordeloup entered the room. Harry immediately pulled back from his position, and Lady Ongar turned to her friend and glared at her with angry eyes.

"Ah," said the little Franco-Pole, with an expression of infinite delight on her detestable visage, "ah, my dears, is it not well that I thus announce myself?"

"Ah," said the little Franco-Pole, with a look of pure delight on her unpleasant face, "ah, my dears, isn’t it great that I’m introducing myself this way?"

"No," said Lady Ongar, "it is not well. It is anything but well."

"No," said Lady Ongar, "it's not good. It's far from good."

"And why not well, Julie? Come, do not be foolish. Mr. Clavering is only a cousin, and a very handsome cousin, too. What does it signify before me?"

"And why not, Julie? Come on, don’t be silly. Mr. Clavering is just a cousin, and a very good-looking one at that. What does it matter to me?"

"It signifies nothing before you," said Lady Ongar.

"It means nothing to you," said Lady Ongar.

"But before the servant, Julie—?"

"But before the servant, Julie—?"

"It would signify nothing before anybody."

"It wouldn't mean anything to anyone."

"Come, come, Julie, dear; that is nonsense."

"Come on, Julie, that's crazy."

"Nonsense or no nonsense, I would wish to be private when I please. Will you tell me, Madame Gordeloup, what is your pleasure at the present moment?"

"Nonsense or not, I’d like to be alone when I want to be. Can you tell me, Madame Gordeloup, what would you like right now?"

"My pleasure is to beg your pardon and to say you must forgive your poor friend. Your fine man-servant is out, and Bessy let me in. I told Bessy I would go up by myself, and that is all. If I have come too late I beg pardon."

"My pleasure is to ask for your forgiveness and to say you must excuse your poor friend. Your great man-servant is out, and Bessy let me in. I told Bessy I would go up by myself, and that’s all. If I’ve come too late, I’m really sorry."

"Not too late, certainly,—as I am still up."

"Definitely not too late—I'm still awake."

"And I wanted to ask you about the pictures to-morrow? You said, perhaps you would go to-morrow,—perhaps not."

"And I wanted to ask you about the pictures tomorrow? You said, maybe you would go tomorrow—maybe not."

Clavering had found himself to be somewhat awkwardly situated while Madame Gordeloup was thus explaining the causes of her having come unannounced into the room; as soon, therefore, as he found it practicable, he took his leave. "Julia," he said, "as Madame Gordeloup is with you, I will now go."

Clavering felt a bit uncomfortable while Madame Gordeloup was explaining why she had come into the room uninvited; so as soon as he could, he said his goodbyes. "Julia," he said, "since Madame Gordeloup is here with you, I'm going to leave now."

"But you will let me see you soon?"

"But you will let me see you soon?"

"Yes, very soon; that is, as soon as I return from Clavering. I leave town early to-morrow morning."

"Yes, very soon; that is, as soon as I return from Clavering. I’m leaving town early tomorrow morning."

"Good-by, then," and she put out her hand to him frankly, smiling sweetly on him. As he felt the warm pressure of her hand he hardly knew whether to return it or to reject it. But he had gone too far now for retreat, and he held it firmly for a moment in his own. She smiled again upon him, oh! so passionately, and nodded her head at him. He had never, he thought, seen a woman look so lovely, or more light of heart. How different was her countenance now from that she had worn when she told him, earlier on that fatal evening, of all the sorrows that made her wretched! That nod of hers said so much. "We understand each other now,—do we not? Yes; although this spiteful woman has for the moment come between us, we understand each other. And is it not sweet? Ah! the troubles of which I told you;—you, you have cured them all." All that had been said plainly in her farewell salutation, and Harry had not dared to contradict it by any expression of his countenance.

"Goodbye, then," she said, extending her hand to him openly, smiling sweetly at him. As he felt the warmth of her hand, he wasn't sure whether to take it or pull away. But he had come too far to backtrack now, so he held onto it firmly for a moment. She smiled at him again, oh! so passionately, and nodded her head. He thought he had never seen a woman look so beautiful or so carefree. How different her face looked now compared to when she had shared all her sorrows with him earlier that fateful evening! That nod of hers conveyed so much. "We get each other now, don’t we? Yes; even though that spiteful woman is momentarily in our way, we understand each other. Isn’t it nice? Ah! The troubles I mentioned to you—you, you’ve solved them all." All of that was clearly expressed in her goodbye gesture, and Harry didn’t dare contradict it with his expression.

"By, by, Mr. Clavering," said Sophie.

"Goodbye, Mr. Clavering," Sophie said.

"Good evening, Madame Gordeloup," said Harry, turning upon her a look of bitter anger. Then he went, leaving the two women together, and walked home to Bloomsbury Square,—not with the heart of a joyous thriving lover.

"Good evening, Madame Gordeloup," Harry said, glaring at her with intense anger. Then he left, leaving the two women together, and walked home to Bloomsbury Square—not with the heart of a happy, thriving lover.

 

 

CHAPTER XXII.

THE DAY OF THE FUNERAL.

Harry Clavering, when he walked away from Bolton Street after the scene in which he had been interrupted by Sophie Gordeloup, was not in a happy frame of mind, nor did he make his journey down to Clavering with much comfort to himself. Whether or no he was now to be regarded as a villain, at any rate he was not a villain capable of doing his villany without extreme remorse and agony of mind. It did not seem to him to be even yet possible that he should be altogether untrue to Florence. It hardly occurred to him to think that he could free himself from the contract by which he was bound to her. No; it was towards Lady Ongar that his treachery must be exhibited;—towards the woman whom he had sworn to befriend, and whom he now, in his distress, imagined to be the dearer to him of the two. He should, according to his custom, have written to Florence a day or two before he left London, and, as he went to Bolton Street, had determined to do so that evening on his return home; but when he reached his rooms he found it impossible to write such a letter. What could he say to her that would not be false? How could he tell her that he loved her, and speak as he was wont to do of his impatience, after that which had just occurred in Bolton Street?

HHarry Clavering, as he walked away from Bolton Street after the incident with Sophie Gordeloup, wasn't feeling happy, nor did he find any comfort on his journey back to Clavering. Whether he should now be seen as a villain or not, he certainly wasn't the kind of villain who could engage in wrongdoing without feeling immense guilt and mental anguish. It didn't even seem possible to him that he could be completely unfaithful to Florence. He barely considered the idea that he could escape the commitment he had made to her. No; his betrayal would have to be directed at Lady Ongar—the woman he had vowed to support, and who he now, in his turmoil, believed was dearer to him than the other. Normally, he would have written to Florence a day or two before leaving London, and as he walked to Bolton Street, he had planned to do so that evening once he got home; but upon reaching his place, he found it impossible to compose such a letter. What could he possibly say to her that wouldn't be a lie? How could he express his love for her and talk about his longing, after what had just happened at Bolton Street?

But what was he to do in regard to Julia? He was bound to let her know at once what was his position, and to tell her that in treating her as he had treated her, he had simply insulted her. That look of gratified contentment with which she had greeted him as he was leaving her, clung to his memory and tormented him. Of that contentment he must now rob her, and he was bound to do so with as little delay as was possible. Early in the morning before he started on his journey he did make an attempt, a vain attempt, to write, not to Florence but to Julia. The letter would not get itself written. He had not the hardihood to inform her that he had amused himself with her sorrows, and that he had injured her by the exhibition of his love. And then that horrid Franco-Pole, whose prying eyes Julia had dared to disregard, because she had been proud of his love! If she had not been there, the case might have been easier. Harry, as he thought of this, forgot to remind himself that if Sophie had not interrupted him he would have floundered on from one danger to another till he would have committed himself more thoroughly even than he had done, and have made promises which it would have been as shameful to break as it would be to keep them. But even as it was, had he not made such promises? Was there not such a promise in that embrace, in the half-forgotten word or two which he had spoken while she was in his arms, and in the parting grasp of his hand? He could not write that letter then, on that morning, hurried as he was with the necessity of his journey; and he started for Clavering resolving that it should be written from his father's house.

But what was he supposed to do about Julia? He had to let her know right away what his situation was and tell her that by treating her the way he had, he had simply insulted her. That look of satisfied contentment she gave him as he was leaving stuck with him and tormented him. He had to take that contentment away from her, and he needed to do it as soon as possible. Early in the morning, before he set off on his journey, he tried to write—not to Florence but to Julia. The letter just wouldn’t come together. He didn’t have the nerve to tell her that he had toyed with her feelings and that he had hurt her by showing his love. And then there was that horrible Franco-Polish guy, whose nosy eyes Julia had dared to ignore because she had been proud of his love! If she hadn’t been there, things might have been simpler. As Harry thought about this, he forgot to remind himself that if Sophie hadn’t interrupted him, he would have stumbled from one problem to another until he had tied himself up even more and made promises that it would be just as shameful to break as it would be to keep. But even then, had he not made such promises? Wasn’t there a promise in that embrace, in the few half-remembered words he had whispered while she was in his arms, and in their parting handshake? He couldn’t write that letter that morning, even though he was pressed for time with his journey; instead, he set off for Clavering, determined to write it from his father's house.

It was a tedious, sad journey to him, and he was silent and out of spirits when he reached his home; but he had gone there for the purpose of his cousin's funeral, and his mood was not at first noticed, as it might have been had the occasion been different. His father's countenance wore that well-known look of customary solemnity which is found to be necessary on such occasions, and his mother was still thinking of the sorrows of Lady Clavering, who had been at the rectory for the last day or two.

It was a long, somber trip for him, and he felt quiet and down when he got home; but he had gone there for his cousin's funeral, so his mood didn’t stand out as much as it might have if the situation were different. His father's face had that familiar look of standard seriousness that is expected on these occasions, and his mother was still preoccupied with the troubles of Lady Clavering, who had been staying at the rectory for the past couple of days.

"Have you seen Lady Ongar since she heard of the poor child's death?" his mother asked.

"Have you seen Lady Ongar since she found out about the poor child's death?" his mother asked.

"Yes, I was with her yesterday evening."

"Yeah, I was with her last night."

"Do you see her often?" Fanny inquired.

"Do you see her a lot?" Fanny asked.

"What do you call often? No; not often. I went to her last night because she had given me a commission. I have seen her three or four times altogether."

"What do you call often? No; not often. I went to see her last night because she had given me a task. I’ve seen her three or four times in total."

"Is she as handsome as she used to be?" said Fanny.

"Is she as attractive as she used to be?" said Fanny.

"I cannot tell; I do not know."

"I can't say; I don't know."

"You used to think her very handsome, Harry."

"You used to think she was really attractive, Harry."

"Of course she is handsome. There has never been a doubt about that; but when a woman is in deep mourning one hardly thinks about her beauty." Oh, Harry, Harry, how could you be so false?

"Of course she is attractive. There has never been any doubt about that; but when a woman is in deep mourning, one hardly thinks about her beauty." Oh, Harry, Harry, how could you be so deceitful?

"I thought young widows were always particularly charming," said Fanny; "and when one remembers about Lord Ongar one does not think of her being a widow so much as one would do if he had been different."

"I’ve always found young widows to be especially charming," said Fanny. "And when you think about Lord Ongar, you don’t really see her as a widow as much as you would if he had been someone else."

"I don't know anything about that," said he. He felt that he was stupid, and that he blundered in every word, but he could not help himself. It was impossible that he should talk about Lady Ongar with proper composure. Fanny saw that the subject annoyed him and that it made him cross, and she therefore ceased. "She wrote a very nice letter to your mother about the poor child, and about her sister," said the rector. "I wish with all my heart that Hermione could go to her for a time."

"I don't know anything about that," he said. He felt dumb and that he messed up every word, but he couldn't help it. It was impossible for him to talk about Lady Ongar calmly. Fanny noticed that the topic bothered him and made him upset, so she stopped. "She wrote a really nice letter to your mom about the poor kid and her sister," said the rector. "I wish with all my heart that Hermione could go stay with her for a while."

"I fear that he will not let her," said Mrs. Clavering. "I do not understand it all, but Hermione says that the rancour between Hugh and her sister is stronger now than ever."

"I’m worried that he won’t allow her," Mrs. Clavering said. "I don’t get the whole situation, but Hermione says the bitterness between Hugh and her sister is worse than ever."

"And Hugh will not be the first to put rancour out of his heart," said the rector.

"And Hugh won't be the first to let go of resentment," said the rector.

On the following day was the funeral and Harry went with his father and cousins to the child's grave. When he met Sir Hugh in the dining-room in the Great House the baronet hardly spoke to him. "A sad occasion; is it not?" said Archie; "very sad; very sad." Then Harry could see that Hugh scowled at his brother angrily, hating his humbug, and hating it the more because in Archie's case it was doubly humbug. Archie was now heir to the property and to the title.

On the next day was the funeral, and Harry went with his dad and cousins to the child's grave. When he saw Sir Hugh in the dining room of the Great House, the baronet hardly acknowledged him. "It's a sad occasion, isn’t it?" said Archie; "very sad; very sad." Then Harry noticed that Hugh glared at his brother in anger, despising his insincerity, and hating it even more because, in Archie's case, it was even more insincere. Archie was now the heir to the property and the title.

After the funeral Harry went to see Lady Clavering, and again had to endure a conversation about Lady Ongar. Indeed, he had been specially commissioned by Julia to press upon her sister the expediency of leaving Clavering for a while. This had been early on that last evening in Bolton Street, long before Madame Gordeloup had made her appearance. "Tell her from me," Lady Ongar had said, "that I will go anywhere that she may wish if she will go with me,—she and I alone; and, Harry, tell her this as though I meant it. I do mean it. She will understand why I do not write myself. I know that he sees all her letters when he is with her." This task Harry was now to perform, and the result he was bound to communicate to Lady Ongar. The message he might give; but delivering the answer to Lady Ongar would be another thing.

After the funeral, Harry went to visit Lady Clavering and once again had to endure a conversation about Lady Ongar. In fact, Julia had specifically asked him to persuade her sister to leave Clavering for a bit. This had happened early on that last evening in Bolton Street, well before Madame Gordeloup had shown up. "Tell her for me," Lady Ongar had said, "that I will go anywhere she wants if she'll come with me—just the two of us; and, Harry, make sure to tell her I really mean it. I do mean it. She'll understand why I’m not writing to her myself. I know he reads all her letters when he's with her." This was the task Harry was now set to accomplish, and he was obligated to report back to Lady Ongar. He could deliver the message, but relaying the response to Lady Ongar would be a different matter.

Lady Clavering listened to what he said, but when he pressed her for a reply she shook her head. "And why not, Lady Clavering?"

Lady Clavering listened to him, but when he asked her for a response, she shook her head. "And why not, Lady Clavering?"

"People can't always leave their houses and go away, Harry."

"People can't always just leave their homes and disappear, Harry."

"But I should have thought that you could have done so now;—that is, before long. Will Sir Hugh remain here at Clavering?"

"But I would have thought that you could do it now;—that is, soon. Will Sir Hugh stay here at Clavering?"

"He has not told me that he means to go."

"He hasn’t told me that he plans to go."

"If he stays, I suppose you will stay; but if he goes up to London again, I cannot see why you and your sister should not go away together. She mentioned Tenby as being very quiet, but she would be guided by you in that altogether."

"If he stays, I guess you will stay too; but if he goes back up to London, I don’t see why you and your sister shouldn’t leave together. She brought up Tenby as a really quiet place, but she would rely on your decision for that."

"I do not think it will be possible, Harry. Tell her with my love, that I am truly obliged to her, but that I do not think it will be possible. She is free, you know, to do what she pleases."

"I don't think it's going to be possible, Harry. Tell her I really appreciate her, but I don’t think it will work out. She's free to do whatever she wants, you know."

"Yes, she is free. But do you mean—?"

"Yes, she's free. But do you mean—?"

"I mean, Harry, that I had better stay where I am. What is the use of a scene, and of being refused at last? Do not say more about it, but tell her that it cannot be so." This Harry promised to do, and after a while was rising to go, when she suddenly asked him a question. "Do you remember what I was saying about Julia and Archie when you were here last?"

"I mean, Harry, that I should probably just stay where I am. What’s the point of creating a scene and getting turned down in the end? Don’t say anything more about it, but tell her that it can’t happen." Harry promised he would, and after a while, he was getting up to leave when she suddenly asked him a question. "Do you remember what I said about Julia and Archie when you were here last?"

"Yes; I remember."

"Yeah, I remember."

"Well, would he have a chance? It seems that you see more of her now than any one else."

"Well, does he have a chance? It looks like you spend more time with her now than anyone else."

"No chance at all, I should say." And Harry, as he answered, could not repress a feeling of most unreasonable jealousy.

"No chance at all, I’d say." And Harry, as he replied, couldn’t help but feel an unreasonable jealousy.

"Ah, you have always thought little of Archie. Archie's position is changed now, Harry, since my darling was taken from me. Of course he will marry, and Hugh, I think, would like him to marry Julia. It was he proposed it. He never likes anything unless he has proposed it himself."

"Ah, you've always underestimated Archie. Archie's situation has changed now, Harry, since my dear was taken from me. Of course, he will get married, and I think Hugh would like him to marry Julia. He was the one who suggested it. He never likes anything unless he has proposed it himself."

"It was he proposed the marriage with Lord Ongar. Does he like that?"

"It was he who proposed the marriage with Lord Ongar. Does he like that?"

"Well; you know, Julia has got her money." Harry, as he heard this, turned away, sick at heart. The poor baby whose mother was now speaking to him had only been buried that morning, and she was already making fresh schemes for family wealth. Julia has got her money! That had seemed to her, even in her sorrow, to be sufficient compensation for all that her sister had endured and was enduring. Poor soul! Harry did not reflect as he should have done, that in all her schemes she was only scheming for that peace which might perhaps come to her if her husband were satisfied. "And why should not Julia take him?" she asked.

"Well, you know, Julia has her money." Harry, upon hearing this, turned away, feeling heartbroken. The poor baby whose mother was now talking to him had been buried that morning, and she was already coming up with new plans for family wealth. Julia has her money! That seemed to her, even in her grief, to be enough compensation for everything her sister had gone through and was still going through. Poor thing! Harry didn’t realize, as he should have, that in all her plans she was just trying to find that peace which might come to her if her husband was happy. "And why shouldn't Julia take him?" she asked.

"I cannot tell why, but she never will," said Harry, almost in anger. At that moment the door was opened, and Sir Hugh came into the room. "I did not know that you were here," Sir Hugh said, turning to the visitor.

"I can't say why, but she never will," Harry said, almost angrily. At that moment, the door swung open, and Sir Hugh walked into the room. "I didn't know you were here," Sir Hugh said, turning to the visitor.

"I could not be down here without saying a few words to Lady Clavering."

"I couldn't be down here without saying a few words to Lady Clavering."

"The less said the better, I suppose, just at present," said Sir Hugh. But there was no offence in the tone of his voice, or in his countenance, and Harry took the words as meaning none.

"The less said the better, I guess, right now," said Sir Hugh. But there was no offense in his tone or his expression, and Harry took the words to mean none.

"I was telling Lady Clavering that as soon as she can, she would be better if she left home for awhile."

"I was telling Lady Clavering that as soon as she can, it would be better for her to leave home for a while."

"And why should you tell Lady Clavering that?"

"And why should you tell Lady Clavering that?"

"I have told him that I would not go," said the poor woman.

"I told him I wouldn’t go," said the poor woman.

"Why should she go, and where; and why have you proposed it? And how does it come to pass that her going or not going should be a matter of solicitude to you?" Now, as Sir Hugh asked these questions of his cousin, there was much of offence in his tone,—of intended offence,—and in his eye, and in all his bearing. He had turned his back upon his wife, and was looking full into Harry's face. "Lady Clavering, no doubt, is much obliged to you," he said, "but why is it that you specially have interfered to recommend her to leave her home at such a time as this?"

"Why should she go, and where; and why did you suggest it? And how is it that her decision to go or not to go matters so much to you?" As Sir Hugh asked these questions of his cousin, there was a lot of offense in his tone—deliberate offense—and in his gaze, and in his whole demeanor. He had turned away from his wife and was staring directly at Harry. "Lady Clavering is certainly grateful to you," he said, "but why have you specifically chosen to step in and suggest that she leave her home at such a time?"

Harry had not spoken as he did to Sir Hugh without having made some calculation in his own mind as to the result of what he was about to say. He did not, as regarded himself, care for his cousin or his cousin's anger. His object at present was simply that of carrying out Lady Ongar's wish, and he had thought that perhaps Sir Hugh might not object to the proposal which his wife was too timid to make to him.

Harry hadn't spoken to Sir Hugh like that without considering the outcome of what he was about to say. He didn't care about his cousin or his cousin's anger. His main goal right now was to fulfill Lady Ongar's wish, and he thought that maybe Sir Hugh wouldn't mind the proposal that his wife was too hesitant to bring up herself.

"It was a message from her sister," said Harry, "sent by me."

"It was a text from her sister," Harry said, "sent by me."

"Upon my word she is very kind. And what was the message,—unless it be a secret between you three?"

"Honestly, she is really nice. And what was the message—unless it’s a secret between you three?"

"I have had no secret, Hugh," said his wife.

"I have no secrets, Hugh," said his wife.

"Let me hear what he has to say," said Sir Hugh.

"Let me hear what he has to say," said Sir Hugh.

"Lady Ongar thought that it might be well that her sister should leave Clavering for a short time, and has offered to go anywhere with her for a few weeks. That is all."

"Lady Ongar thought it might be a good idea for her sister to leave Clavering for a little while, and she has offered to go anywhere with her for a few weeks. That’s all."

"And why the devil should Hermione leave her own house? And if she were to leave it, why should she go with a woman that has misconducted herself?"

"And why on earth would Hermione leave her own house? And if she did leave, why would she go with a woman who has behaved badly?"

"Oh, Hugh!" exclaimed Lady Clavering.

"Oh, Hugh!" said Lady Clavering.

"Lady Ongar has never misconducted herself," said Harry.

"Lady Ongar has never misbehaved," Harry said.

"Are you her champion?" asked Sir Hugh.

"Are you her champion?" Sir Hugh asked.

"As far as that, I am. She has never misconducted herself; and what is more, she has been cruelly used since she came home."

"As far as that goes, I am. She has never behaved badly; and what's more, she's been treated really poorly since she got home."

"By whom; by whom?" said Sir Hugh, stepping close up to his cousin and looking with angry eyes into his face.

"By whom; by whom?" Sir Hugh said, stepping closer to his cousin and glaring angrily at his face.

But Harry Clavering was not a man to be intimidated by the angry eyes of any man. "By you," he said, "her brother-in-law;—by you, who made up her wretched marriage, and who, of all others, were the most bound to protect her."

But Harry Clavering was not the kind of guy to be intimidated by anyone's angry glare. "By you," he said, "her brother-in-law;—by you, who set up her miserable marriage, and who, more than anyone else, should have protected her."

"Oh, Harry, don't, don't!" shrieked Lady Clavering.

"Oh, Harry, please, don’t!" cried Lady Clavering.

"Hermione, hold your tongue," said the imperious husband; "or, rather, go away and leave us. I have a word or two to say to Harry Clavering, which had better be said in private."

"Hermione, keep quiet," said the commanding husband; "or better yet, just go away and leave us. I need to have a word or two with Harry Clavering that’s better said in private."

"I will not go if you are going to quarrel."

"I won't go if you're going to argue."

"Harry," said Sir Hugh, "I will trouble you to go downstairs before me. If you will step into the breakfast-room I will come to you."

"Harry," said Sir Hugh, "could you please go downstairs ahead of me? If you head into the breakfast room, I'll join you there."

Harry Clavering did as he was bid, and in a few minutes was joined by his cousin in the breakfast-room.

Harry Clavering did what he was told, and a few minutes later, his cousin joined him in the breakfast room.

"No doubt you intended to insult me by what you said upstairs." The baronet began in this way after he had carefully shut the door, and had slowly walked up to the rug before the fire, and had there taken his position.

"No doubt you meant to insult me with what you said upstairs." The baronet started like this after he had carefully closed the door, slowly walked up to the rug by the fire, and taken his place there.

"Not at all; I intended to take the part of an ill-used woman whom you had calumniated."

"Not at all; I meant to play the role of a mistreated woman whom you had slandered."

"Now look here, Harry, I will have no interference on your part in my affairs, either here or elsewhere. You are a very fine fellow, no doubt, but it is not part of your business to set me or my house in order. After what you have just said before Lady Clavering you will do well not to come here in my absence."

"Listen, Harry, I won’t tolerate any interference from you in my affairs, either here or anywhere else. You’re a great guy, but it’s not your job to get me or my house in order. After what you just said in front of Lady Clavering, it would be best for you not to come here when I’m not around."

"Neither in your absence nor in your presence."

"Neither when you’re here nor when you’re not."

"As to the latter you may do as you please. And now touching my sister-in-law, I will simply recommend you to look after your own affairs."

"As for the latter, you can do whatever you want. Now, regarding my sister-in-law, I just suggest you take care of your own business."

"I shall look after what affairs I please."

"I'll take care of whatever I want."

"Of Lady Ongar and her life since her marriage I daresay you know as little as anybody in the world, and I do not suppose it likely that you will learn much from her. She made a fool of you once, and it is on the cards that she may do so again."

"Regarding Lady Ongar and her life since getting married, I’m sure you know as little as anyone else. I doubt you’ll get much from her. She once made a fool out of you, and it’s possible she might do it again."

"You said just now that you would brook no interference in your affairs. Neither will I."

"You just said that you wouldn't tolerate any interference in your matters. Neither will I."

"I don't know that you have any affairs in which any one can interfere. I have been given to understand that you are engaged to marry that young lady whom your mother brought here one day to dinner. If that be so, I do not see how you can reconcile it to yourself to become the champion, as you called it, of Lady Ongar."

"I don't think you have any matters that anyone can interfere with. I've been led to believe that you're planning to marry that young lady your mother brought here for dinner one day. If that's true, I don't see how you can justify being the champion, as you put it, for Lady Ongar."

"I never said anything of the kind."

"I never said anything like that."

"Yes, you did."

"Yeah, you did."

"No; it was you who asked me whether I was her champion."

"No, it was you who asked me if I was her champion."

"And you said you were."

"And you said you were."

"So far as to defend her name when I heard it traduced by you."

"So far as to defend her reputation when I heard you slander it."

"By heavens, your impudence is beautiful. Who knows her best, do you think,—you or I? Whose sister-in-law is she? You have told me I was cruel to her. Now to that I will not submit, and I require you to apologize to me."

"Wow, your boldness is impressive. Who knows her better, do you think—me or you? Whose sister-in-law is she? You said I was mean to her. I’m not going to accept that, and I need you to apologize to me."

"I have no apology to make, and nothing to retract."

"I have no apologies to make and nothing to take back."

"Then I shall tell your father of your gross misconduct, and shall warn him that you have made it necessary for me to turn his son out of my house. You are an impertinent, overbearing puppy, and if your name were not the same as my own, I would tell the grooms to horsewhip you off the place."

"Then I will inform your father about your terrible behavior and let him know that you've forced me to kick his son out of my house. You're a rude, arrogant brat, and if your name wasn't the same as mine, I would tell the stablehands to whip you off the property."

"Which order, you know, the grooms would not obey. They would a deal sooner horsewhip you. Sometimes I think they will, when I hear you speak to them."

"Which order, you know, the grooms wouldn't follow. They'd much rather horsewhip you. Sometimes I think they might when I hear you talk to them."

"Now go!"

"Go now!"

"Of course I shall go. What would keep me here?"

"Of course I'll go. What would make me stay here?"

Sir Hugh then opened the door, and Harry passed through it, not without a cautious look over his shoulder, so that he might be on his guard if any violence were contemplated. But Hugh knew better than that, and allowed his cousin to walk out of the room, and out of the house, unmolested.

Sir Hugh then opened the door, and Harry stepped through it, casting a careful glance over his shoulder to stay alert in case any violence was planned. But Hugh was more aware than that, allowing his cousin to walk out of the room and leave the house without any trouble.

And this had happened on the day of the funeral! Harry Clavering had quarrelled thus with the father within a few hours of the moment in which they two had stood together over the grave of that father's only child! As he thought of this while he walked across the park he became sick at heart. How vile, wretched and miserable was the world around him! How terribly vicious were the people with whom he was dealing! And what could he think of himself,—of himself, who was engaged to Florence Burton, and engaged also, as he certainly was, to Lady Ongar? Even his cousin had rebuked him for his treachery to Florence; but what would his cousin have said had he known all? And then what good had he done;—or rather what evil had he not done? In his attempt on behalf of Lady Clavering had he not, in truth, interfered without proper excuse, and fairly laid himself open to anger from his cousin? And he felt that he had been an ass, a fool, a conceited ass, thinking that he could produce good, when his interference could be efficacious only for evil. Why could he not have held his tongue when Sir Hugh came in, instead of making that vain suggestion as to Lady Clavering? But even this trouble was but an addition to the great trouble that overwhelmed him. How was he to escape the position which he had made for himself in reference to Lady Ongar? As he had left London he had promised to himself that he would write to her that same night and tell her everything as to Florence; but the night had passed, and the next day was nearly gone, and no such letter had been written.

And this happened on the day of the funeral! Harry Clavering had fought with the father just hours after they had stood together by the grave of that father's only child! As he thought about this while walking through the park, he felt a deep sadness. How horrible, miserable, and wretched was the world around him! How incredibly deceitful were the people he was dealing with! And what could he think of himself—of himself, who was engaged to Florence Burton and also, as he definitely was, to Lady Ongar? Even his cousin had called him out for betraying Florence; but what would his cousin have said if he knew everything? And what good had he done—or rather, what harm had he not done? In his attempt to help Lady Clavering, had he not, in truth, interfered without valid reason and opened himself up to anger from his cousin? He felt that he had been a fool, a conceited fool, thinking he could do good when his interference only led to trouble. Why couldn’t he have kept quiet when Sir Hugh came in, instead of making that pointless suggestion about Lady Clavering? But even this issue was just another layer on top of the huge problem that was weighing him down. How was he going to escape the situation he had created for himself regarding Lady Ongar? As he left London, he had promised himself he would write to her that same night and explain everything about Florence; but the night had passed, and the next day was almost over, and he hadn't written that letter.

As he sat with his father that evening, he told the story of his quarrel with his cousin. His father shrugged his shoulders and raised his eyebrows. "You are a bolder man than I am," he said. "I certainly should not have dared to advise Hugh as to what he should do with his wife."

As he sat with his dad that evening, he shared the story of his fight with his cousin. His dad shrugged and raised his eyebrows. "You're braver than I am," he said. "I definitely wouldn't have had the guts to tell Hugh what to do with his wife."

"But I did not advise him. I only said that I had been talking to her about it. If he were to say to you that he had been recommending my mother to do this or that, you would not take it amiss?"

"But I didn't advise him. I just mentioned that I had been discussing it with her. If he told you he had been suggesting my mom do this or that, would you take it the wrong way?"

"But Hugh is a peculiar man."

"But Hugh is an odd guy."

"No man has a right to be peculiar. Every man is bound to accept such usage as is customary in the world."

"No one has the right to be unusual. Everyone is expected to follow the norms that are typical in society."

"I don't suppose that it will signify much," said the rector. "To have your cousin's doors barred against you, either here or in London, will not injure you."

"I don't think it will matter much," said the rector. "Having your cousin's doors closed to you, whether here or in London, won't hurt you."

"Oh, no; it will not injure me; but I do not wish you to think that I have been unreasonable."

"Oh, no; it won't hurt me, but I don't want you to think that I've been unreasonable."

The night went by and so did the next day, and still the letter did not get itself written. On the third morning after the funeral he heard that Sir Hugh had gone away; but he, of course, did not go up to the house, remembering well that he had been warned by the master not to do so in the master's absence. His mother, however, went to Lady Clavering, and some intercourse between the families was renewed. He had intended to stay but one day after the funeral, but at the end of a week he was still at the rectory. It was Whitsuntide he said, and he might as well take his holiday as he was down there. Of course they were glad that he should remain with them, but they did not fail to perceive that things with him were not altogether right; nor had Fanny failed to perceive that he had not once mentioned Florence's name since he had been at the rectory.

The night passed, and then the next day went by, but he still hadn't written the letter. On the third morning after the funeral, he found out that Sir Hugh had left; yet he, of course, didn’t go to the house, remembering that the master had warned him not to do so in his absence. His mother, however, visited Lady Clavering, which rekindled some interactions between the families. He had planned to stay just one day after the funeral, but at the end of a week, he was still at the rectory. He mentioned it was Whitsuntide, so he might as well enjoy his holiday while he was there. Naturally, they were happy for him to stay with them, but they couldn’t help but notice that something seemed off with him; Fanny also noticed that he hadn’t mentioned Florence's name once since he arrived at the rectory.

"Harry," she said, "there is nothing wrong between you and Florence?"

"Harry," she said, "is everything okay between you and Florence?"

"Harry," she said, "there is nothing       wrong between you and Florence?"
"Harry," she said, "is everything alright between you and Florence?"
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"Wrong! what should there be wrong? What do you mean by wrong?"

"Wrong! What could possibly be wrong? What do you mean by 'wrong'?"

"I had a letter from her to-day and she asks where you are."

"I got a letter from her today, and she wants to know where you are."

"Women expect such a lot of letter-writing! But I have been remiss I know. I got out of my business way of doing things when I came down here and have neglected it. Do you write to her to-morrow, and tell her that she shall hear from me directly I get back to town."

"Women expect so much letter-writing! But I know I've been slacking. I got out of my usual routine when I came down here and have let it slide. Can you write to her tomorrow and let her know she'll hear from me as soon as I get back to town?"

"But why should you not write to her from here?"

"But why shouldn't you write to her from here?"

"Because I can get you to do it for me."

"Because I can have you do it for me."

Fanny felt that this was not at all like a lover, and not at all like such a lover as her brother had been. While Florence had been at Clavering he had been most constant with his letters, and Fanny had often heard Florence boast of them as being perfect in their way. She did not say anything further at the present moment, but she knew that things were not altogether right. Things were by no means right. He had written neither to Lady Ongar nor to Florence, and the longer he put off the task the more burdensome did it become. He was now telling himself that he would write to neither till he got back to London.

Fanny felt this was nothing like a lover and definitely not like the kind of lover her brother had been. When Florence was at Clavering, he had been very consistent with his letters, and Fanny had often heard Florence brag about them as being perfect in their own way. She didn’t say anything more at that moment, but she sensed that things were not quite right. They were far from right. He hadn’t written to either Lady Ongar or Florence, and the longer he delayed, the more it weighed on him. He was now convincing himself that he wouldn’t write to either until he returned to London.

On the day before he went, there came to him a letter from Stratton. Fanny was with him when he received it, and observed that he put it into his pocket without opening it. In his pocket he carried it unopened half the day, till he was ashamed of his own weakness. At last, almost in despair with himself, he broke the seal and forced himself to read it. There was nothing in it that need have alarmed him. It contained hardly a word that was intended for a rebuke.

On the day before he left, he received a letter from Stratton. Fanny was with him when it arrived and noticed that he tucked it into his pocket without reading it. He carried it unopened for almost half the day until he felt embarrassed by his own indecision. Finally, feeling almost desperate, he broke the seal and made himself read it. There was nothing in it that should have worried him. It barely contained any words meant as a reprimand.

"I wonder why you should have been two whole weeks without writing," she said. "It seems so odd to me, because you have spoiled me by your customary goodness. I know that other men when they are engaged do not trouble themselves with constant letter-writing. Even Theodore, who according to Cecilia is perfect, would not write to her then very often; and now, when he is away, his letters are only three lines. I suppose you are teaching me not to be exacting. If so, I will kiss the rod like a good child; but I feel it the more because the lesson has not come soon enough."

"I can't believe you've gone two whole weeks without writing," she said. "It feels so strange to me because you've spoiled me with your usual kindness. I know that other guys who are engaged don’t bother with constant letter-writing. Even Theodore, who according to Cecilia is perfect, doesn’t write her very often; and now that he’s away, his letters are only three lines long. I guess you’re trying to teach me not to be demanding. If that’s the case, I’ll accept my punishment like a good kid; but it stings more because the lesson didn’t come soon enough."

Then she went on in her usual strain, telling him of what she had done, what she had read, and what she had thought. There was no suspicion in her letter, no fear, no hint at jealousy. And she should have no further cause for jealousy! One of the two must be sacrificed, and it was most fitting that Julia should be the sacrifice. Julia should be sacrificed,—Julia and himself! But still he could not write to Florence till he had written to Julia. He could not bring himself to send soft, pretty, loving words to one woman while the other was still regarding him as her affianced lover.

Then she continued in her usual way, telling him about what she had done, what she had read, and what she had thought. There was no suspicion in her letter, no fear, no hint of jealousy. And she shouldn't have any more reason to be jealous! One of the two had to be sacrificed, and it was only right that Julia should be the one. Julia should be the one to go—Julia and himself! But still, he couldn't write to Florence until he had written to Julia. He just couldn't bring himself to send sweet, lovely, affectionate words to one woman while the other still saw him as her engaged lover.

"Was your letter from Florence this morning?" Fanny asked him.

"Did you get a letter from Florence this morning?" Fanny asked him.

"Yes; it was."

"Yeah, it was."

"Had she received mine?"

"Did she get mine?"

"I don't know. Of course she had. If you sent it by post of course she got it."

"I don't know. Of course she did. If you sent it by mail, she definitely got it."

"She might have mentioned it, perhaps."

"She might have brought it up, maybe."

"I daresay she did. I don't remember."

"I guess she did. I can't remember."

"Well, Harry; you need not be cross with me because I love the girl who is going to be your wife. You would not like it if I did not care about her."

"Well, Harry, you don’t need to be mad at me just because I love the girl who’s going to be your wife. You wouldn’t like it if I didn’t care about her."

"I hate being called cross."

"I hate being called upset."

"Suppose I were to say that I hated your being cross. I'm sure I do;—and you are going away to-morrow, too. You have hardly said a nice word to me since you have been home."

"Let's say I told you that I hate when you're upset. I'm sure I do;—and you're leaving tomorrow, too. You’ve barely said anything nice to me since you got home."

Harry threw himself back into a chair almost in despair. He was not enough a hypocrite to say nice words when his heart within him was not at ease. He could not bring himself to pretend that things were pleasant.

Harry slumped back into a chair, nearly in despair. He wasn’t such a hypocrite that he could say nice things when his heart wasn’t at ease. He couldn’t force himself to pretend that everything was fine.

"If you are in trouble, Harry, I will not go on teasing you."

"If you're in trouble, Harry, I won't keep teasing you."

"I am in trouble," he said.

"I'm in trouble," he said.

"And cannot I help you?"

"Can I not help you?"

"No; you cannot help me. No one can help me. But do not ask any questions."

"No, you can't help me. No one can help me. But please don't ask any questions."

"Oh, Harry! is it about money?"

"Oh, Harry! Is this about money?"

"No, no; it has nothing to do with money."

"No, no; it has nothing to do with money."

"You have not really quarrelled with Florence?"

"You haven't actually fought with Florence?"

"No; I have not quarrelled with her at all. But I will not answer more questions. And, Fanny, do not speak of this to my father or mother. It will be over before long, and then, if possible, I will tell you."

"No, I haven't had any arguments with her at all. But I won't answer any more questions. And, Fanny, please don't mention this to my dad or mom. It will be sorted out soon, and then, if I can, I'll tell you."

"Harry, you are not going to fight with Hugh?"

"Harry, you’re not going to fight with Hugh?"

"Fight with Hugh! no. Not that I should mind it; but he is not fool enough for that. If he wanted fighting done, he would do it by deputy. But there is nothing of that kind."

"Fight with Hugh! No. Not that it would bother me; but he's not stupid enough for that. If he wanted a fight, he'd get someone else to do it for him. But that's not happening."

She asked him no more questions, and on the next morning he returned to London. On his table he found a note which he at once knew to be from Lady Ongar, and which had come only that afternoon.

She didn’t ask him any more questions, and the next morning he went back to London. On his desk, he found a note that he instantly recognized as being from Lady Ongar, which had just arrived that afternoon.

"Come to me at once;—at once." That was all that the note contained.

"Come to me immediately;—immediately." That was all the note said.

 

 

CHAPTER XXIII.

CUMBERLY LANE WITHOUT THE MUD.

Fanny Clavering, while she was inquiring of her brother about his troubles, had not been without troubles of her own. For some days past she had been aware,—almost aware,—that Mr. Saul's love was not among the things that were past. I am not prepared to say that this conviction on her part was altogether an unalloyed trouble, or that there might have been no faint touch of sadness, of silent melancholy about her, had it been otherwise. But Mr. Saul was undoubtedly a trouble to her; and Mr. Saul with his love in activity would be more troublesome than Mr. Saul with his love in abeyance. "It would be madness either in him or in me," Fanny had said to herself very often; "he has not a shilling in the world." But she thought no more in these days of the awkwardness of his gait, or of his rusty clothes, or his abstracted manner; and for his doings as a clergyman her admiration had become very great. Her mother saw something of all this, and cautioned her; but Fanny's demure manner deceived Mrs. Clavering. "Oh, mamma, of course I know that anything of the kind must be impossible; and I am sure he does not think of it himself any longer." When she had said this, Mrs. Clavering had believed that it was all right. The reader must not suppose that Fanny had been a hypocrite. There had been no hypocrisy in her words to her mother. At that moment the conviction that Mr. Saul's love was not among past events had not reached her; and as regarded herself, she was quite sincere when she said that anything of the kind must be impossible.

Fanny Clavering, while she was asking her brother about his problems, had her own troubles as well. For the past few days, she had been aware, almost aware, that Mr. Saul's love was still a thing. I can't say this realization was purely a burden for her, or that she wouldn’t have experienced even a hint of sadness, a quiet melancholy, if things were different. But Mr. Saul was definitely a source of trouble for her, and having Mr. Saul actively in love would be more complicated than having him in the background. "It would be crazy for either him or me," Fanny thought to herself often; "he doesn’t have a penny to his name." However, she didn’t focus anymore on his awkward walk, his shabby clothes, or his distracted demeanor; and her admiration for his work as a clergyman had grown significantly. Her mother noticed some of this and warned her, but Fanny’s innocent demeanor fooled Mrs. Clavering. "Oh, Mom, of course I know that anything like that is impossible; and I’m sure he doesn’t think about it anymore." After hearing this, Mrs. Clavering believed everything was fine. But don’t think that Fanny was being two-faced. There was no dishonesty in her words to her mother. At that moment, she hadn’t fully recognized that Mr. Saul’s love was still alive; and as far as she was concerned, she was completely honest when she said that anything like that couldn’t possibly happen.

It will be remembered that Florence Burton had advised Mr. Saul to try again, and that Mr. Saul had resolved that he would do so,—resolving, also, that should he try in vain he must leave Clavering, and seek another home. He was a solemn, earnest, thoughtful man; to whom such a matter as this was a phase of life very serious, causing infinite present trouble, nay, causing tribulation, and, to the same extent, capable of causing infinite joy. From day to day he went about his work, seeing her amidst his ministrations almost daily. And never during these days did he say a word to her of his love,—never since that day in which he had plainly pleaded his cause in the muddy lane. To no one but Florence Burton had he since spoken of it, and Florence had certainly been true to her trust; but, notwithstanding all that, Fanny's conviction was very strong.

It will be remembered that Florence Burton had advised Mr. Saul to try again, and that Mr. Saul had decided he would do so—also deciding that if he tried without success, he would have to leave Clavering and find another place to live. He was a serious, earnest, thoughtful man, for whom this issue was a very serious aspect of life, causing immense current trouble, even leading to distress, and, to the same degree, capable of bringing immense joy. Day by day, he went about his work, seeing her in his duties almost every day. And never during these days did he tell her about his love—not since that day when he had openly expressed his feelings in the muddy lane. He had spoken to no one but Florence Burton about it since then, and Florence had certainly been loyal to her promise; however, despite that, Fanny's belief was very strong.

Florence had counselled Mr. Saul to try again, and Mr. Saul was prepared to make the attempt; but he was a man who allowed himself to do nothing in a hurry. He thought much of the matter before he could prepare himself to recur to the subject; doubting, sometimes, whether he would be right to do so without first speaking to Fanny's father; doubting, afterwards, whether he might not best serve his cause by asking the assistance of Fanny's mother. But he resolved at last that he would depend on himself alone. As to the rector, if his suit to Fanny were a fault against Mr. Clavering as Fanny's father, that fault had been already committed. But Mr. Saul would not admit to himself that it was a fault. I fancy that he considered himself to have, as a gentleman, a right to address himself to any lady with whom he was thrown into close contact. I fancy that he ignored all want of worldly preparation,—never for a moment attempting to place himself on a footing with men who were richer than himself, and, as the world goes, brighter, but still feeling himself to be in no way lower than they. If any woman so lived as to show that she thought his line better than their line, it was open to him to ask such woman to join her lot to his. If he failed, the misfortune was his; and the misfortune, as he well knew, was one which it was hard to bear. And as to the mother, though he had learned to love Mrs. Clavering dearly,—appreciating her kindness to all those around her, her conduct to her husband, her solicitude in the parish, all her genuine goodness, still he was averse to trust to her for any part of his success. Though Mr. Saul was no knight, though he had nothing knightly about him, though he was a poor curate in very rusty clothes and with manner strangely unfitted for much communion with the outer world, still he had a feeling that the spoil which he desired to win should be won by his own spear, and that his triumph would lose half its glory if it were not achieved by his own prowess. He was no coward, either in such matter as this or in any other. When circumstances demanded that he should speak he could speak his mind freely, with manly vigour, and sometimes not without a certain manly grace.

Florence had advised Mr. Saul to give it another try, and he was ready to make the attempt; but he was a man who never rushed into things. He pondered over the issue for a long time before gearing up to bring it up again; sometimes he wondered whether it would be right to do so without first talking to Fanny's father; later, he questioned whether it would be better for his case to seek help from Fanny's mother. However, he ultimately decided to rely solely on himself. As for the rector, if his pursuit of Fanny was a mistake in Mr. Clavering's eyes as her father, that mistake had already been made. But Mr. Saul wouldn't acknowledge it as a mistake. I believe he thought that, as a gentleman, he had the right to address any lady he found himself in close quarters with. I think he disregarded any lack of social standing—never once attempting to compare himself with wealthier and seemingly more accomplished men, while still feeling no less than they. If any woman acted in a way that suggested she valued his lifestyle over theirs, he felt entitled to invite her to share her life with him. If he failed, that misfortune was his alone; and he knew well that such misfortune was difficult to endure. And regarding the mother, although he had grown to care for Mrs. Clavering deeply—appreciating her kindness to those around her, her treatment of her husband, her dedication to the parish, and her genuine goodness—he was reluctant to depend on her for any part of his success. Even though Mr. Saul was no knight and had nothing knightly about him, being just a poor curate in very worn-out clothes with a demeanor not suited for much interaction with the outside world, he felt that the prize he sought should be won by his own efforts, and that his victory would lose much of its significance if it were not achieved through his own skill. He was no coward, either in this matter or in any other. When circumstances required him to speak, he could express his thoughts openly, with masculine energy, and sometimes even with a certain masculine grace.

How did Fanny know that it was coming? She did know it, though he had said nothing to her beyond his usual parish communications. He was often with her in the two schools; often returned with her in the sweet spring evenings along the lane that led back to the rectory from Cumberly Green; often inspected with her the little amounts of parish charities and entries of pence collected from such parents as could pay. He had never reverted to that other subject. But yet Fanny knew that it was coming, and when she had questioned Harry about his troubles she had been thinking also of her own.

How did Fanny know it was coming? She did know, even though he hadn’t mentioned anything to her beyond his usual parish updates. He often spent time with her at the two schools; they frequently walked back together on sweet spring evenings along the lane that led from Cumberly Green to the rectory; and he often reviewed the small amounts of parish charity funds and the pennies collected from parents who could pay. He had never brought up that other topic again. But still, Fanny knew it was on its way, and when she asked Harry about his troubles, she was also thinking about her own.

It was now the middle of May, and the spring was giving way to the early summer almost before the spring had itself arrived. It is so, I think, in these latter years. The sharpness of March prolongs itself almost through April; and then, while we are still hoping for the spring, there falls upon us suddenly a bright, dangerous, delicious gleam of summer. The lane from Cumberly Green was no longer muddy, and Fanny could go backwards and forwards between the parsonage and her distant school without that wading for which feminine apparel is so unsuited. One evening, just as she had finished her work, Mr. Saul's head appeared at the school-door, and he asked her whether she were about to return home. As soon as she saw his eye and heard his voice, she feared that the day was come. She was prepared with no new answer, and could only give the answer that she had given before. She had always told herself that it was impossible; and as to all other questions, about her own heart or such like, she had put such questions away from her as being unnecessary, and, perhaps, unseemly. The thing was impossible, and should therefore be put away out of thought, as a matter completed and at an end. But now the time was come, and she almost wished that she had been more definite in her own resolutions.

It was now the middle of May, and spring was quickly turning into early summer before spring had even fully settled in. I think this is how it goes in these recent years. The chill of March lingers almost through April; and then, just when we're still hoping for spring, a bright, risky, wonderful glimpse of summer hits us unexpectedly. The lane from Cumberly Green was no longer muddy, and Fanny could walk back and forth between the parsonage and her faraway school without the need to wade through it, which is so inconvenient for women’s clothing. One evening, just after she finished her work, Mr. Saul's head appeared at the school door, and he asked her if she was about to head home. As soon as she caught his eye and heard his voice, she feared that the moment had arrived. She wasn’t prepared with a new answer and could only give the same response she had given before. She had always convinced herself that it was impossible; and as for any other questions about her own feelings or anything else, she had pushed those thoughts aside as unnecessary and perhaps inappropriate. The idea was impossible, and thus it should be dismissed from her mind, as something that was settled and done. But now the moment had come, and she almost wished she had been clearer in her own decisions.

"Yes, Mr. Saul, I have just done."

"Yes, Mr. Saul, I just finished."

"I will walk with you, if you will let me." Then Fanny spoke some words of experienced wisdom to two or three girls, in order that she might show to them, to him, and to herself that she was quite collected. She lingered in the room for a few minutes, and was very wise and very experienced. "I am quite ready now, Mr. Saul." So saying, she came forth upon the green lane, and he followed her.

"I'll walk with you, if that's okay." Then Fanny shared some insightful advice with a couple of girls, wanting to demonstrate to them, to him, and to herself that she was completely composed. She stayed in the room for a few minutes, acting very wise and knowledgeable. "I'm all set now, Mr. Saul." With that, she stepped out onto the green lane, and he followed her.

They walked on in silence for a little way, and then he asked her some question about Florence Burton. Fanny told him that she had heard from Stratton two days since, and that Florence was well.

They walked on in silence for a while, and then he asked her a question about Florence Burton. Fanny told him that she had heard from Stratton two days ago, and that Florence was doing well.

"I liked her very much," said Mr. Saul.

"I really liked her," said Mr. Saul.

"So did we all. She is coming here again in the autumn; so it will not be very long before you see her again."

"So did we all. She's coming back here in the fall, so it won't be long before you see her again."

"How that may be I cannot tell, but if you see her that will be of more consequence."

"How that might be, I can't say, but if you see her, that will matter more."

"We shall all see her, of course."

"We'll all see her, of course."

"It was here, in this lane, that I was with her last, and wished her good-by. She did not tell you of my having parted with her, then?"

"It was here, in this alley, that I last saw her and said goodbye. She didn’t mention that I had said goodbye to her, did she?"

"Not especially, that I remember."

"Not really, that I remember."

"Ah, you would have remembered if she had told you; but she was quite right not to tell you." Fanny was now a little confused, so that she could not exactly calculate what all this meant. Mr. Saul walked on by her side, and for some moments nothing was said. After a while he recurred again to his parting from Florence. "I asked her advice on that occasion, and she gave it me clearly,—with a clear purpose and an assured voice. I like a person who will do that. You are sure then that you are getting the truth out of your friend, even if it be a simple negative, or a refusal to give any reply to the question asked."

"Ah, you would have remembered if she had told you; but she was completely right not to share it with you." Fanny felt a bit confused, so she couldn't quite figure out what all this meant. Mr. Saul walked beside her, and for a few moments, they didn't say anything. After a while, he brought up his farewell to Florence again. "I asked her for advice at that time, and she gave it to me clearly—with a clear purpose and a confident voice. I appreciate someone who does that. You can be sure you’re getting the truth from your friend, even if it’s just a simple no or a refusal to answer the question asked."

"Florence Burton is always clear in what she says."

"Florence Burton always speaks clearly."

"I had asked her if she thought that I might venture to hope for a more favourable answer if I urged my suit to you again."

"I asked her if she thought I'd have a better chance if I pressed my case to you again."

"She cannot have said yes to that, Mr. Saul; she cannot have done so!"

"She can't have said yes to that, Mr. Saul; she just can't have!"

"She did not do so. She simply bade me ask yourself. And she was right. On such a matter there is no one to whom I can with propriety address myself, but to yourself. Therefore I now ask you the question. May I venture to have any hope?"

"She didn’t do that. She just told me to ask you. And she was right. When it comes to this kind of thing, there’s no one I can properly talk to except you. So now I’m asking you the question. Can I hope for anything?"

His voice was so solemn, and there was so much of eager seriousness in his face that Fanny could not bring herself to answer him with quickness. The answer that was in her mind was in truth this: "How can you ask me to try to love a man who has but seventy pounds a year in the world, while I myself have nothing?" But there was something in his demeanour,—something that was almost grand in its gravity,—which made it quite impossible that she should speak to him in that tone. But he, having asked his question, waited for an answer; and she was well aware that the longer she delayed it, the weaker became the ground on which she was standing.

His voice was so serious, and there was so much eager intensity in his expression that Fanny couldn't bring herself to respond quickly. The answer she had in mind was honestly this: "How can you ask me to try to love a man who makes only seventy pounds a year when I have nothing?" But there was something in his demeanor—something almost noble in its seriousness—that made it impossible for her to speak to him that way. However, he had asked his question and was waiting for a reply; she knew that the longer she hesitated, the weaker her position became.

"It is quite impossible," she said at last.

"It’s completely impossible," she finally said.

"If it really be so,—if you will say again that it is so after hearing me out to an end, I will desist. In that case I will desist and leave you,—and leave Clavering."

"If that's how it really is—if you’ll still say that after you've listened to everything I have to say, then I'll stop. In that case, I’ll stop and walk away from you—and from Clavering."

"Oh, Mr. Saul, do not do that,—for papa's sake, and because of the parish."

"Oh, Mr. Saul, please don't do that—for Dad's sake and for the parish."

"I would do much for your father, and as to the parish I love it well. I do not think I can make you understand how well I love it. It seems to me that I can never again have the same feeling for any place that I have for this. There is not a house, a field, a green lane, that is not dear to me. It is like a first love. With some people a first love will come so strongly that it makes a renewal of the passion impossible." He did not say that it would be so with himself, but it seemed to her that he intended that she should so understand him.

"I would do a lot for your father, and I really love the parish. I don't think I can express how much I love it. It feels like I can never feel the same way about any other place as I do about this one. Every house, every field, every green lane is precious to me. It's like a first love. For some people, a first love is so intense that they can't ever feel that passion again." He didn't say it would be the same for him, but it seemed to her that he wanted her to think that way.

"I do not see why you should leave Clavering," she said.

"I don't see why you should leave Clavering," she said.

"If you knew the nature of my regard for yourself, you would see why it should be so. I do not say that there ought to be any such necessity. If I were strong there would be no such need. But I am weak,—weak in this; and I could not hold myself under such control as is wanted for the work I have to do." When he had spoken of his love for the place,—for the parish, there had been something of passion in his language; but now in the words which he spoke of himself and of his feeling for her, he was calm and reasonable and tranquil, and talked of his going away from her as he might have talked had some change of air been declared necessary for his health. She felt that this was so, and was almost angry with him.

"If you understood how I feel about you, you would realize why it has to be this way. I’m not saying there should be any need for it. If I were stronger, it wouldn’t be necessary. But I'm weak—weak in this area; and I can’t maintain the kind of control that's required for what I need to do." When he talked about his love for the place—for the parish—there was a passionate tone in his words; but now, when he spoke about himself and his feelings for her, he was calm, rational, and peaceful, discussing his departure from her as if it were simply a necessary change of scenery for his health. She recognized this and felt almost angry with him.

"Of course you must know what will be best for yourself," she said.

"Of course you know what’s best for you," she said.

"Yes; I know now what I must do, if such is to be your answer. I have made up my mind as to that. I cannot remain at Clavering, if I am told that I may never hope that you will become my wife."

"Yes; I now know what I need to do if that's your answer. I've made my decision about it. I can't stay at Clavering if I'm told that I'll never have the chance to be with you as my wife."

"But, Mr. Saul—"

"But, Mr. Saul—"

"Well; I am listening. But before you speak, remember how all-important your words will be to me."

"Okay, I'm listening. But before you say anything, keep in mind how important your words will be to me."

"No; they cannot be all-important."

"No, they can't be everything."

"As regards my present happiness and rest in this world they will be so. Of course I know that nothing you can say or do will hurt me beyond that. But you might help me even to that further and greater bliss. You might help me too in that,—as I also might help you."

"As for my current happiness and peace in this world, they will be. I know that nothing you say or do can hurt me beyond this point. But you could help me reach an even greater joy. You could help me with that—as I could help you too."

"But, Mr. Saul—" she began again, and then, feeling that she must go on, she forced herself to utter words which at the time she felt to be commonplace. "People cannot marry without an income. Mr. Fielding did not think of such a thing till he had a living assured to him."

"But, Mr. Saul—" she started again, and then, realizing she had to continue, she pushed herself to say things that she felt were ordinary at that moment. "People can’t get married without an income. Mr. Fielding didn’t consider it until he had a steady job guaranteed to him."

"But, independently of that, might I hope?" She ventured for an instant to glance at his face, and saw that his eyes were glistening with a wonderful brightness.

"But, aside from that, can I hope?" She briefly dared to look at his face and saw that his eyes were shining with a beautiful sparkle.

"How can I answer you further? Is not that reason enough why such a thing should not be even discussed?"

"How can I respond to you anymore? Isn't that a good enough reason for why this shouldn't even be talked about?"

"No, Miss Clavering, it is not reason enough. If you were to tell me that you could never love me,—me, personally,—that you could never regard me with affection, that would be reason why I should desist;—why I should abandon all my hope here, and go away from Clavering for ever. Nothing else can be reason enough. My being poor ought not to make you throw me aside if you loved me. If it were so that you loved me, I think you would owe it me to say so, let me be ever so poor."

"No, Miss Clavering, that's not a good enough reason. If you were to tell me that you could never love me—me, specifically—that you could never feel affection for me, then that would be a reason for me to back off; for me to give up all hope here and leave Clavering for good. Nothing else can be a good enough reason. My poverty shouldn't make you push me away if you truly loved me. If you did love me, I think you would owe it to me to admit it, even if I'm really poor."

"I do not like you the less because you are poor."

"I don’t like you any less because you’re poor."

"But do you like me at all? Can you bring yourself to love me? Would you make the effort if I had such an income as you thought necessary? If I had such riches, could you teach yourself to regard me as him whom you were to love better than all the world beside? I call upon you to answer me that question truly; and if you tell me that it could be so, I will not despair, and I will not go away."

"But do you even like me? Can you bring yourself to love me? Would you put in the effort if I had the income you think is necessary? If I had that kind of wealth, could you convince yourself to see me as the one you would love more than anyone else? I'm asking you to answer that question honestly; and if you say it could be true, I won’t lose hope, and I won’t walk away."

As he said this they came to a turn in the road which brought the parsonage gate within their view. Fanny knew that she would leave him there and go in alone, but she knew also that she must say something further to him before she could thus escape. She did not wish to give him an assurance of her positive indifference to him,—and still less did she wish to tell him that he might hope. It could not be possible that such an engagement should be approved by her father, nor could she bring herself to think that she could be quite contented with a lover such as Mr. Saul. When he had first proposed to her she had almost ridiculed his proposition in her heart. Even now there was something in it that was almost ridiculous;—and yet there was something in it also that touched her as being sublime. The man was honest, good, and true,—perhaps the best and truest man that she had ever known. She could not bring herself to say to him any word that should banish him for ever from the place he loved so well.

As he said this, they reached a turn in the road that brought the parsonage gate into view. Fanny knew she would leave him there and go in alone, but she also realized she had to say something more before she could do that. She didn't want to assure him that she was completely indifferent to him, and even less did she want to give him false hope. There was no way her father would approve of such an engagement, and she couldn't imagine being truly happy with a partner like Mr. Saul. When he first proposed to her, she had almost laughed at the idea in her heart. Even now, there was something about it that seemed almost laughable; yet there was also something that moved her, almost as if it were lofty. The man was honest, good, and genuine—perhaps the best and most sincere person she had ever known. She couldn't bring herself to say anything that would send him away forever from the place he cherished so much.

"If you knew your own heart well enough to answer me, you should do so," he went on to say. "If you do not, say so, and I will be content to wait your own time."

"If you knew your heart well enough to answer me, you should," he continued. "If you don't, just say so, and I’ll be fine waiting for you to figure it out."

"It would be better, Mr. Saul, that you should not think of this any more."

"It would be better, Mr. Saul, if you stopped thinking about this."

"No, Miss Clavering; that would not be better,—not for me; for it would prove me to be utterly heartless. I am not heartless. I love you dearly. I will not say that I cannot live without you; but it is my one great hope as regards this world, that I should have you at some future day as my own. It may be that I am too prone to hope; but surely, if that were altogether beyond hope, you would have found words to tell me so by this time." They had now come to the gateway, and he paused as she put her trembling hand upon the latch.

"No, Miss Clavering; that wouldn't be better—not for me; because it would show I'm completely heartless. I'm not heartless. I love you deeply. I won't say I can't live without you, but my biggest hope for this world is that, someday, you'll be mine. Maybe I'm too optimistic, but if that hope was completely out of reach, you would have said something by now." They had now reached the gate, and he paused as she placed her trembling hand on the latch.

"I cannot say more to you now," she said.

"I can't say anything more to you right now," she said.

"Then let it be so. But, Miss Clavering, I shall not leave this place till you have said more than that. And I will speak the truth to you, even though it may offend you. I have more of hope now than I have ever had before,—more hope that you may possibly learn to love me. In a few days I will ask you again whether I may be allowed to speak upon the subject to your father. Now I will say farewell, and may God bless you; and remember this,—that my only earthly wish and ambition is in your hands." Then he went on his way towards his own lodgings, and she entered the parsonage garden by herself.

"Then let it be so. But, Miss Clavering, I won't leave this place until you say more than that. I’m going to be honest with you, even if it might upset you. I have more hope now than I ever did before—more hope that you might actually learn to love me. In a few days, I’ll ask you again if I can discuss this with your father. For now, I’ll say goodbye, and may God bless you; just remember this—my only earthly wish and ambition are in your hands." Then he continued on to his place, and she entered the parsonage garden alone.

What should she now do, and how should she carry herself? She would have gone to her mother at once, were it not that she could not resolve what words she would speak to her mother. When her mother should ask her how she regarded the man, in what way should she answer that question? She could not tell herself that she loved Mr. Saul; and yet, if she surely did not love him,—if such love were impossible,—why had she not said as much to him? We, however, may declare that that inclination to ridicule his passion, to think of him as a man who had no right to love, was gone for ever. She conceded to him clearly that right, and knew that he had exercised it well. She knew that he was good and true, and honest, and recognized in him also manly courage and spirited resolution. She would not tell herself that it was impossible that she should love him.

What should she do now, and how should she carry herself? She would have gone to her mom right away if she hadn't been stuck on what to say to her. When her mom asked how she felt about the guy, how would she respond? She couldn’t just say she loved Mr. Saul; yet, if she definitely didn’t love him—if that kind of love was out of the question—why hadn’t she told him? But we can say that her tendency to mock his feelings, to see him as a person who had no right to love, was gone for good. She clearly accepted that right, and she knew he had used it well. She recognized that he was good, honest, and true, and she also saw his bravery and determination. She wouldn’t convince herself that it was impossible for her to love him.

She went up at last to her room doubting, unhappy, and ill at ease. To have such a secret long kept from her mother would make her life unendurable to her. But she felt that, in speaking to her mother, only one aspect of the affair would be possible. Even though she loved him, how could she marry a curate whose only income was seventy pounds a year?

She finally went up to her room feeling doubtful, unhappy, and restless. Keeping such a secret from her mother for so long would make her life unbearable. But she realized that when she talked to her mother, she would only be able to address one part of the situation. Even though she loved him, how could she marry a curate whose only income was seventy pounds a year?

 

 

CHAPTER XXIV.

THE RUSSIAN SPY.

When the baby died at Clavering Park, somebody hinted that Sir Hugh would certainly quarrel with his brother as soon as Archie should become the father of a presumptive heir to the title and property. That such would be the case those who best knew Sir Hugh would not doubt. That Archie should have that of which he himself had been robbed, would of itself be enough to make him hate Archie. But, nevertheless, at this present time, he continued to instigate his brother in that matter of the proposed marriage with Lady Ongar. Hugh, as well as others, felt that Archie's prospects were now improved, and that he could demand the hand of a wealthy lady with more of seeming propriety than would have belonged to such a proposition while the poor child was living. No one would understand this better than Lady Ongar, who knew so well all the circumstances of the family. The day after the funeral the two brothers returned to London together, and Hugh spoke his mind in the railway carriage. "It will be no good for you to hang on about Bolton Street, off and on, as though she were a girl of seventeen," he said.

When the baby died at Clavering Park, someone suggested that Sir Hugh would definitely argue with his brother as soon as Archie became the father of a potential heir to the title and estate. Those who knew Sir Hugh well wouldn’t doubt that this would happen. The fact that Archie would have what Sir Hugh had been deprived of would be enough to make him resentful. Still, at this moment, he continued to push his brother regarding the planned marriage with Lady Ongar. Hugh, along with others, sensed that Archie’s chances had improved, allowing him to propose to a wealthy woman with more legitimacy now that the poor child was gone. No one would understand this better than Lady Ongar, who was well aware of the family situation. The day after the funeral, the two brothers traveled back to London together, and Hugh expressed his thoughts in the train carriage. "It won't do you any good to hang around Bolton Street, in and out, as if she were a seventeen-year-old girl," he said.

"I'm quite up to that," said Archie. "I must let her know I'm there of course. I understand all that."

"I'm totally on board with that," said Archie. "I need to let her know I'm around, obviously. I get all that."

"Then why don't you do it? I thought you meant to go to her at once when we were talking about it before in London."

"Then why don't you just do it? I thought you intended to go see her right away when we were discussing it earlier in London."

"So I did go to her, and got on with her very well, too, considering that I hadn't been there long when another woman came in."

"So I went to her, and we got along really well, especially since I hadn't been there long when another woman walked in."

"But you didn't tell her what you had come about?"

"But you didn't tell her why you came?"

"No; not exactly. You see it doesn't do to pop at once to a widow like her. Ongar, you know, hasn't been dead six months. One has to be a little delicate in these things."

"No, not really. You see, it’s not appropriate to approach a widow like her so quickly. Ongar hasn’t been dead for six months yet. You have to be a bit sensitive in these situations."

"Believe me, Archie, you had better give up all notions of being delicate, and tell her what you want at once,—plainly and fairly. You may be sure that she will not think of her former husband, if you don't."

"Trust me, Archie, you should really let go of any ideas about being subtle and just tell her what you want right away—straightforward and honest. You can be sure she won't think about her ex-husband if you don't."

"Oh! I don't think about him at all."

"Oh! I don't think about him at all."

"Who was the woman you say was there?"

"Who was the woman you said was there?"

"That little Frenchwoman,—the sister of the man;—Sophie she calls her. Sophie Gordeloup is her name. They are bosom friends."

"That little French woman—the sister of the man—she calls her Sophie. Her name is Sophie Gordeloup. They are close friends."

"The sister of that count?"

"Is that count's sister?"

"Yes; his sister. Such a woman for talking! She said ever so much about your keeping Hermione down in the country."

"Yeah, his sister. She really knows how to talk! She went on and on about you keeping Hermione out in the country."

"The devil she did. What business was that of hers? That is Julia's doing."

"The devil she did. What was it to her? That’s all Julia’s doing."

"Well; no, I don't think so. Julia didn't say a word about it. In fact, I don't know how it came up. But you never heard such a woman to talk,—an ugly, old, hideous little creature! But the two are always together."

"Well, no, I don’t think so. Julia didn’t mention it at all. Honestly, I’m not sure how it even came up. But you’ve never heard anyone talk like her—she’s an ugly, old, hideous little thing! Yet the two are always together."

"If you don't take care you'll find that Julia is married to the count while you are thinking about it."

"If you're not careful, you'll realize that Julia is married to the count while you're still pondering it."

Then Archie began to consider whether he might not as well tell his brother of his present scheme with reference to Julia. Having discussed the matter at great length with his confidential friend, Captain Boodle, he had come to the conclusion that his safest course would be to bribe Madame Gordeloup, and creep into Julia's favour by that lady's aid. Now, on his return to London, he was about at once to play that game, and had already provided himself with funds for the purpose. The parting with ready money was a grievous thing to Archie, though in this case the misery would be somewhat palliated by the feeling that it was a bonâ fide sporting transaction. He would be lessening the odds against himself by a judicious hedging of his bets. "You must stand to lose something always by the horse you mean to win," Doodles had said to him, and Archie had recognized the propriety of the remark. He had, therefore, with some difficulty, provided himself with funds, and was prepared to set about his hedging operations as soon as he could find Madame Gordeloup on his return to London. He had already ascertained her address through Doodles, and had ascertained by the unparalleled acuteness of his friend that the lady was—a Russian spy. It would have been beautiful to have seen Archie's face when this information was whispered into his ear, in private, at the club. It was as though he had then been made acquainted with some great turf secret, unknown to the sporting world in general.

Then Archie started to think about whether he should tell his brother about his current plan involving Julia. After a long discussion with his close friend, Captain Boodle, he decided that the best move would be to bribe Madame Gordeloup and win Julia over with her help. Now, back in London, he was ready to make that move and had already set aside money for it. Parting with cash was tough for Archie, but this time, the discomfort was eased by the fact that it felt like a genuine gamble. He was lowering his risks by making a smart bet. "You always have to risk something with the horse you want to win," Doodles had told him, and Archie understood the wisdom in that. So, with some effort, he got the money together and was prepared to start his betting strategy as soon as he could track down Madame Gordeloup in London. Thanks to Doodles, he knew her address and had learned, through his friend's remarkable insight, that she was—wait for it—a Russian spy. You can only imagine the look on Archie's face when he heard this news whispered in his ear, in private, at the club. It was as if he had been let in on some major secret about the racing world that nobody else knew.

"Ah!" he said, drawing a long breath, "no;—by George, is she?"

"Ah!" he said, taking a deep breath, "no;—by George, is she?"

The same story had been told everywhere in London of the little woman for the last half dozen years, whether truly or untruly I am not prepared to say; but it had not hitherto reached Archie Clavering; and now, on hearing it, he felt that he was becoming a participator in the deepest diplomatic secrets of Europe.

The same story had been shared all over London about the little woman for the past six years, and whether it was true or not, I can't say; but it had never gotten to Archie Clavering before now, and upon hearing it, he felt like he was getting involved in the deepest diplomatic secrets of Europe.

"By George," said he, "is she really?"

"By George," he said, "is she actually?"

And his respect for the little woman rose a thousand per cent.

And his respect for the little woman skyrocketed.

"That's what she is," said Doodles, "and it's a doosed fine thing for you, you know! Of course you can make her safe, and that will be everything."

"That's who she is," said Doodles, "and it's a really great thing for you, you know! Of course you can keep her safe, and that will be everything."

Archie resolved at once that he would use the great advantage which chance and the ingenuity of his friend had thrown in his way; but that necessity of putting money in his purse was a sore grievance to him, and it occurred to him that it would be a grand thing if he could induce his brother to help him in this special matter. If he could only make Hugh see the immense advantage of an alliance with the Russian spy, Hugh could hardly avoid contributing to the expense,—of course on the understanding that all such moneys were to be repaid when the Russian spy's work had been brought to a successful result. Russian spy! There was in the very sound of the words something so charming that it almost made Archie in love with the outlay. A female Russian spy too! Sophie Gordeloup certainly retained but very few of the charms of womanhood, nor had her presence as a lady affected Archie with any special pleasure; but yet he felt infinitely more pleased with the affair than he would have been had she been a man spy. The intrigue was deeper. His sense of delight in the mysterious wickedness of the thing was enhanced by an additional spice. It is not given to every man to employ the services of a political Russian lady-spy in his love-affairs! As he thought of it in all its bearings, he felt that he was almost a Talleyrand, or, at any rate, a Palmerston.

Archie immediately decided to take advantage of the opportunity that fate and his friend’s cleverness had presented. However, the need to put money in his pocket was a real struggle for him, and he thought it would be fantastic if he could convince his brother to help him with this particular issue. If only he could make Hugh understand the significant benefits of teaming up with the Russian spy, Hugh would likely contribute to the costs—of course, on the condition that all funds were to be repaid once the Russian spy’s mission was successfully completed. Russian spy! Just the sound of the words was so appealing that it almost made Archie excited about the spending. A female Russian spy too! Sophie Gordeloup had certainly lost most of the charms of womanhood, and her presence as a lady hadn’t particularly delighted Archie; yet, he felt far more pleased about the situation than he would have been if she were a male spy. The intrigue was deeper. His enjoyment of the mysterious wickedness of the scenario was heightened by an extra thrill. Not every man gets to involve a political Russian lady-spy in his romantic affairs! As he considered the situation from every angle, he felt almost like Talleyrand or, at the very least, Palmerston.

Should he tell his brother? If he could represent the matter in such a light to his brother as to induce Hugh to produce the funds for purchasing the Spy's services, the whole thing would be complete with a completeness that has rarely been equalled. But he doubted. Hugh was a hard man,—a hard, unimaginative man, and might possibly altogether refuse to believe in the Russian spy. Hugh believed in little but what he himself saw, and usually kept a very firm grasp upon his money.

Should he tell his brother? If he could present the situation in a way that would convince Hugh to come up with the funds to hire the spy, everything would be wrapped up in a way that was rarely matched. But he wasn’t sure. Hugh was a tough guy—a tough, uncreative guy—and might completely refuse to believe in the Russian spy. Hugh only believed in what he saw himself and usually held on tightly to his money.

"That Madame Gordeloup is always with Julia," Archie said, trying the way, as it were, before he told his plan.

"Madame Gordeloup is always with Julia," Archie said, testing the waters, so to speak, before he shared his plan.

"Of course she will help her brother's views."

"Of course she will support her brother's opinions."

"I'm not so sure of that. Some of these foreign women ain't like other women at all. They go deeper;—a doosed sight deeper."

"I'm not so sure about that. Some of these foreign women aren't like other women at all. They go deeper; a hell of a lot deeper."

"Into men's pockets, you mean."

"Into guys' pockets, you mean."

"They play a deep game altogether. What do you suppose she is, now?" This question Archie asked in a whisper, bending his head forward towards his brother, though there was no one else in the carriage with them.

"They're playing a serious game together. What do you think she is now?" Archie asked this in a whisper, leaning his head toward his brother, even though there was no one else in the carriage with them.

"What she is? A thief of some kind probably. I've no doubt she's up to any roguery."

"What is she? Probably some kind of thief. I'm sure she's up to no good."

"She's a—Russian spy."

"She's a Russian spy."

"Oh, I've heard of that for the last dozen years. All the ugly old Frenchwomen in London are Russian spies, according to what people say; but the Russians know how to use their money better than that. If they employ spies, they employ people who can spy something."

"Oh, I've been hearing about that for the last twelve years. According to what people say, all the unattractive older French women in London are Russian spies; but the Russians know how to use their money better than that. If they hire spies, they hire people who can actually gather valuable information."

Archie felt this to be cruel,—very cruel, but he said nothing further about it. His brother was stupid, pigheaded, obstinate, and quite unfitted by nature for affairs of intrigue. It was, alas, certain that his brother would provide no money for such a purpose as that he now projected; but, thinking of this, he found some consolation in the reflection that Hugh would not be a participator with him in his great secret. When he should have bought the Russian spy, he and Doodles would rejoice together in privacy without any third confederate. Triumviri might be very well; Archie also had heard of triumviri; but two were company, and three were none. Thus he consoled himself when his pigheaded brother expressed his disbelief in the Russian spy.

Archie thought this was really harsh—very harsh—but he didn’t say anything more about it. His brother was clueless, stubborn, and completely unsuited for dealing with tricky situations. Unfortunately, it was clear that his brother wouldn’t provide any money for the scheme he was planning; however, thinking about this brought him some comfort in knowing that Hugh wouldn’t be involved in his big secret. Once he had bought the Russian spy, he and Doodles would celebrate privately without any third party. Triumvirs might be fine; Archie had heard of triumvirs; but two people were a good crowd, and three just got in the way. This is how he reassured himself when his stubborn brother scoffed at the idea of the Russian spy.

There was nothing more said between them in the railway carriage, and, as they parted at the door in Berkeley Square, Hugh swore to himself that this should be the last season in which he would harbour his brother in London. After this he must have a house of his own there, or have no house at all. Then Archie went down to his club, and finally arranged with Doodles that the first visit to the Spy should be made on the following morning. After much consultation it was agreed between them that the way should be paved by a diplomatic note. The diplomatic note was therefore written by Doodles and copied by Archie.

There was nothing more said between them in the train carriage, and as they parted at the door in Berkeley Square, Hugh promised himself that this would be the last season he would let his brother stay in London. After this, he needed to have his own place there, or no place at all. Then Archie went down to his club and finally arranged with Doodles that they would make their first visit to the Spy the next morning. After a lot of discussion, they agreed that a diplomatic note should set the stage. So, Doodles wrote the diplomatic note and Archie copied it.

"Captain Clavering presents his compliments to Madame Gordeloup, and proposes to call upon her to-morrow morning at twelve o'clock, if that hour will be convenient. Captain Clavering is desirous of consulting Madame Gordeloup on an affair of much importance." "Consult me!" said Sophie to herself, when she got the letter. "For what should he consult me? It is that stupid man I saw with Julie. Ah, well; never mind. The stupid man shall come." The commissioner, therefore, who had taken the letter to Mount Street, returned to the club with a note in which Madame Gordeloup expressed her willingness to undergo the proposed interview. Archie felt that the letter,—a letter from a Russian spy addressed positively to himself,—gave him already diplomatic rank, and he kept it as a treasure in his breast coat-pocket.

"Captain Clavering sends his regards to Madame Gordeloup and plans to visit her tomorrow morning at twelve o'clock, if that time works for her. Captain Clavering wants to discuss something very important with Madame Gordeloup." "Consult me!" Sophie said to herself when she received the letter. "What does he need to consult me about? It's that foolish man I saw with Julie. Oh well; never mind. The foolish man can come." The commissioner, who had taken the letter to Mount Street, returned to the club with a note in which Madame Gordeloup confirmed her willingness to meet. Archie felt that the letter—a note from a Russian spy addressed explicitly to him—already gave him a sense of diplomatic status, and he kept it as a treasure in his breast pocket.

It then became necessary that he and his friend should discuss the manner in which the Spy should be managed. Doodles had his misgivings that Archie would be awkward, and almost angered his friend by the repetition of his cautions. "You mustn't chuck your money at her head, you know," said Doodles.

It became necessary for him and his friend to talk about how to handle the Spy. Doodles was worried that Archie would be clumsy and almost annoyed his friend by repeating his warnings. "You can't just throw your money at her, you know," Doodles said.

"Of course not; but when the time comes I shall slip the notes into her hand,—with a little pressure perhaps."

"Of course not; but when the time comes, I'll slip the notes into her hand—maybe with a little pressure, too."

"It would be better to leave them near her on the table."

"It would be better to leave them next to her on the table."

"Do you think so?"

"Do you really think that?"

"Oh, yes; a great deal. It's always done in that way."

"Oh, definitely; a lot. It’s always done like that."

"But perhaps she wouldn't see them,—or wouldn't know where they came from."

"But maybe she wouldn't see them—or wouldn't know where they came from."

"Let her alone for that."

"Leave her alone for that."

"But I must make her understand what I want of her,—in return, you know. I ain't going to give her twenty pounds for nothing."

"But I have to make her understand what I expect from her—in return, you know. I'm not just going to give her twenty pounds for nothing."

"You must explain that at first; tell her that you expect her aid, and that she will find you a grateful friend,—a grateful friend, say;—mind you remember that."

"You need to explain that to her first; let her know you expect her help, and that she'll find you a thankful friend— a thankful friend, you hear?—make sure you remember that."

"Yes; I'll remember that. I suppose it would be as good a way as any."

"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind. I guess it’s as good a way as any."

"It's the only way, unless you want her to ring for the servant to kick you out of the house. It's as well understood as A B C, among the people who do these things. I should say take jewellery instead of money if she were anything but a Russian spy; but they understand the thing so well, that you may go farther with them than with others."

"It's the only option, unless you want her to call the servant to kick you out of the house. It's as clear as A B C among those who do this kind of thing. I'd say take jewelry instead of cash if she were anyone but a Russian spy; but they know the game so well that you can get further with them than with others."

Archie's admiration for Sophie became still higher as he heard this. "I do like people," said he, "who understand what's what, and no mistake."

Archie's admiration for Sophie grew even more as he heard this. "I really like people," he said, "who know what's what, no doubt about it."

"But even with her you must be very careful."

"But even with her, you have to be really careful."

"Oh, yes; that's a matter of course."

"Oh, for sure; that's a given."

"When I was declaring for the last time that she would find me a grateful friend, just at the word grateful, I would put down the four fivers on the table, smoothing them with my hand like that." Then Doodles acted the part, putting a great deal of emphasis on the word grateful, as he went through the smoothing ceremony with two or three sheets of club notepaper. "That's your game, you may be sure. If you put them into her hand she may feel herself obliged to pretend to be angry; but she can't be angry simply because you put your money on her table. Do you see that, old fellow?" Archie declared that he did see it very plainly. "If she does not choose to undertake the job, she'll merely have to tell you that you have left something behind you."

"When I was declaring for the last time that she would find me a grateful friend, just as I said the word grateful, I would place the four twenty-dollar bills on the table, smoothing them with my hand like this." Then Doodles acted it out, putting a lot of emphasis on the word grateful as he went through the smoothing process with two or three sheets of club notepaper. "That's your strategy, you can count on it. If you put them in her hand, she might feel she has to pretend to be upset, but she can't really be angry just because you put your money on her table. Do you get that, old buddy?" Archie said he understood it very clearly. "If she doesn't want to take the job, she'll just have to tell you that you left something behind."

"But there's no fear of that, I suppose?"

"But I guess there's no need to worry about that, right?"

"I can't say. Her hands may be full, you know, or she may think you don't go high enough."

"I can't say. She might be too busy, you know, or she might think you're not aiming high enough."

"But I mean to tip her again, of course."

"But I plan to give her a tip again, of course."

"Again! I should think so. I suppose she must have about a couple of hundred before the end of next month if she's to do any good. After a bit you'll be able to explain that she shall have a sum down when the marriage has come off."

"Again! I thought so. I guess she must have around a couple of hundred before the end of next month if she’s going to make any progress. After a while, you’ll be able to explain that she’ll receive a lump sum once the wedding is settled."

"She won't take the money and do nothing; will she?"

"She’s not going to take the money and sit around, is she?"

"Oh, no; they never sell you like that. It would spoil their own business if they were to play that game. If you can make it worth her while, she'll do the work for you. But you must be careful;—do remember that." Archie shook his head, almost in anger, and then went home for his night's rest.

"Oh, no; they would never sell you like that. It would ruin their own business if they played that game. If you can make it worth her while, she'll do the work for you. But you have to be careful;—remember that." Archie shook his head, almost in anger, and then went home for the night.

On the next morning he dressed himself in his best, and presented himself at the door in Mount Street, exactly as the clock struck twelve. He had an idea that these people were very punctilious as to time. Who could say but that the French ambassador might have an appointment with Madame Gordeloup at half-past one,—or perhaps some emissary from the Pope! He had resolved that he would not take his left glove off his hand, and he had thrust the notes in under the palm of his glove, thinking he could get at them easier from there, should they be wanted in a moment, than he could do from his waistcoat pocket. He knocked at the door, knowing that he trembled as he did so, and felt considerable relief when he found himself to be alone in the room to which he was shown. He knew that men conversant with intrigues always go to work with their eyes open, and, therefore, at once, he began to look about him. Could he not put the money into some convenient hiding-place,—now at once? There, in one corner, was the spot in which she would seat herself upon the sofa. He saw plainly enough, as with the eye of a Talleyrand, the marks thereon of her constant sitting. So he seized the moment to place a chair suitable for himself, and cleared a few inches on the table near to it, for the smoothing of the bank-notes,—feeling, while so employed, that he was doing great things. He had almost made up his mind to slip one note between the pages of a book, not with any well-defined plan as to the utility of such a measure, but because it seemed to be such a diplomatic thing to do! But while this grand idea was still flashing backwards and forwards across his brain, the door opened, and he found himself in the presence of—the Russian spy.

The next morning, he got dressed in his best clothes and showed up at the door on Mount Street just as the clock struck twelve. He figured these people were really strict about time. Who knew if the French ambassador had a meeting with Madame Gordeloup at half-past one—or maybe some messenger from the Pope! He had decided he wouldn't take his left glove off and had tucked the notes under the palm of his glove, thinking it would be easier to grab them from there if he needed them quickly than from his waistcoat pocket. He knocked on the door, aware that he was shaking, and felt a sense of relief when he found himself alone in the room he was shown to. He knew that people who are used to dealing with intrigue always keep their eyes open, so he immediately started to look around. Could he find a good hiding spot for the money—right now? There, in one corner, was where she would sit on the sofa. He could clearly see, like a Talleyrand, the signs of her frequent sitting. So, he took the opportunity to move a chair for himself and cleared some space on the nearby table to smooth out the banknotes—feeling, as he did this, that he was pulling off something significant. He almost decided to slip one note between the pages of a book, not with any clear idea of how that would help, but simply because it seemed like a clever thing to do! But while this brilliant idea was still racing through his mind, the door opened, and he found himself face-to-face with—the Russian spy.

He at once saw that the Russian spy was very dirty, and that she wore a nightcap, but he liked her the better on that account. A female Russian spy should, he felt, differ much in her attire from other women. If possible, she should be arrayed in diamonds, and pearl ear-drops, with as little else upon her as might be; but failing that costume, which might be regarded as the appropriate evening spy costume,—a tumbled nightcap, and a dirty white wrapper, old cloth slippers, and objectionable stockings were just what they should be.

He immediately noticed that the Russian spy was very unkempt and wearing a nightcap, but he actually liked her more because of it. He thought a female Russian spy should look quite different from other women. Ideally, she should be dressed in diamonds and pearl earrings, with as little else on as possible; but if that outfit wasn't possible, which he felt was the right attire for an evening spy—then a messy nightcap, a dirty white robe, old cloth slippers, and questionable stockings were exactly what she should wear.

"Ah!" said the lady, "you are Captain Clavering. Yes, I remember."

"Ah!" said the lady, "you’re Captain Clavering. Yeah, I remember."

"I am Captain Clavering. I had the honour of meeting you at Lady Ongar's."

"I’m Captain Clavering. I had the pleasure of meeting you at Lady Ongar’s."

"And now you wish to consult me on an affair of great importance. Very well. You may consult me. Will you sit down—there." And Madame Gordeloup indicated to him a chair just opposite to herself, and far removed from that convenient spot which Archie had prepared for the smoothing of the bank-notes. Near to the place now assigned to him there was no table whatever, and he felt that he would in that position be so completely raked by the fire of her keen eyes, that he would not be able to carry on his battle upon good terms. In spite, therefore, of the lady's very plain instructions, he made an attempt to take possession of the chair which he had himself placed; but it was an ineffectual attempt, for the Spy was very peremptory with him. "There, Captain Clavering; there; there; you will be best there." Then he did as he was bid, and seated himself, as it were, quite out at sea, with nothing but an ocean of carpet around him, and with no possibility of manipulating his notes except under the raking fire of those terribly sharp eyes. "And now," said Madame Gordeloup, "you can commence to consult me. What is the business?"

"And now you want to talk to me about something important. All right. You can consult me. Please have a seat—over there." Madame Gordeloup pointed to a chair directly across from her, far from the spot where Archie had set up for smoothing the banknotes. The chair she indicated had no table nearby, and he realized that in this position, he would be completely exposed to the scrutiny of her sharp eyes, making it difficult to handle his situation effectively. Therefore, despite her clear instructions, he tried to take the chair he had originally placed, but it was a futile attempt, as the Spy was very insistent with him. "There, Captain Clavering; there; that's best for you." So, he complied and sat down, feeling like he was out in the open, surrounded only by a sea of carpet, unable to manage his notes without being under the intense gaze of those piercing eyes. "Now," said Madame Gordeloup, "you can start consulting me. What’s the matter?"

Ah; what was the business? That was now the difficulty? In discussing the proper way of tendering the bank-notes, I fear the two captains had forgotten the nicest point of the whole negotiation. How was he to tell her what it was that he wanted to do himself, and what that she was to be required to do for him? It behoved him above all things not to be awkward! That he remembered. But how not to be awkward? "Well!" she said; and there was something almost of crossness in her tone. Her time, no doubt, was valuable. The French ambassador might even now be coming. "Well?"

Ah, what was the problem? That was the real challenge, right? While discussing the best way to hand over the bank notes, I think the two captains overlooked the most crucial aspect of the whole deal. How was he supposed to explain what he wanted to do and what she was expected to do for him? Above all, he needed to avoid being clumsy! That he remembered. But how could he avoid being awkward? “Well!” she said, and there was a hint of irritation in her voice. Her time was definitely precious. The French ambassador could be arriving any moment now. “Well?”

"I think, Madame Gordeloup, you know my brother's sister-in-law, Lady Ongar?"

"I think, Madame Gordeloup, you know my brother's sister-in-law, Lady Ongar?"

"What, Julie? Of course I know Julie. Julie and I are dear friends."

"What? Julie? Of course I know her. Julie and I are great friends."

"So I supposed. That is the reason why I have come to you."

"So I thought. That's why I came to you."

"Well;—well;—well?"

"Well, well, well?"

"Lady Ongar is a person whom I have known for a long time, and for whom I have a great,—I may say a very deep regard."

"Lady Ongar is someone I've known for a long time, and I have a great—I'd even say a very deep regard for her."

"Ah! yes. What a jointure she has! and what a park! Thousands and thousands of pounds,—and so beautiful! If I was a man I should have a very deep regard too. Yes."

"Ah! yes. What a settlement she has! And what a park! Thousands and thousands of pounds—and so beautiful! If I were a man, I would definitely have a very deep affection as well. Yes."

"A most beautiful creature;—is she not?"

"A really beautiful creature; isn't she?"

"Ah; if you had seen her in Florence, as I used to see her, in the long summer evenings! Her lovely hair was all loose to the wind, and she would sit hour after hour looking, oh, at the stars! Have you seen the stars in Italy?"

"Ah, if you had seen her in Florence, like I used to, on those long summer evenings! Her beautiful hair blowing in the wind, and she would sit for hours just gazing at, oh, the stars! Have you seen the stars in Italy?"

Captain Clavering couldn't say that he had, but he had seen them uncommon bright in Norway, when he had been fishing there.

Captain Clavering couldn't say that he had, but he had seen them unusually bright in Norway when he had gone fishing there.

"Or the moon?" continued Sophie, not regarding his answer. "Ah; that is to live! And he, her husband, the rich lord, he was dying,—in a little room just inside, you know. It was very melancholy, Captain Clavering. But when she was looking at the moon, with her hair all dishevelled," and Sophie put her hands up to her own dirty nightcap, "she was just like a Magdalen; yes, just the same;—just the same."

"Or the moon?" Sophie went on, ignoring his response. "Ah, that’s living! And he, her husband, the wealthy lord, he was dying—in a small room just inside, you know. It was really sad, Captain Clavering. But when she was gazing at the moon, with her hair all messy," and Sophie raised her hands to her own dirty nightcap, "she looked just like a Magdalen; yes, exactly the same;—just the same."

The exact strength of the picture, and the nature of the comparison drawn, were perhaps lost upon Archie; and indeed, Sophie herself probably trusted more to the tone of her words, than to any idea which they contained; but their tone was perfect, and she felt that if anything could make him talk, he would talk now.

The exact impact of the picture and the kind of comparison being made might have gone over Archie's head; in fact, Sophie probably relied more on how she said it than on what she actually meant. But her tone was spot on, and she sensed that if anything could get him to open up, it would be this moment.

"Dear me! you don't say so. I have always admired her very much, Madame Gordeloup."

"Wow! I can't believe it. I've always admired her a lot, Madame Gordeloup."

"Well?"

"What's up?"

The French ambassador was probably in the next street already, and if Archie was to tell his tale at all he must do it now.

The French ambassador was probably already in the next street, and if Archie wanted to share his story, he had to do it now.

"You will keep my secret if I tell it you?" he asked.

"You'll keep my secret if I tell you?" he asked.

"Is it me you ask that? Did you ever hear of me that I tell a gentleman's secret? I think not. If you have a secret, and will trust me, that will be good; if you will not trust me,—that will be good also."

"Are you asking me that? Have you ever heard of me revealing a gentleman's secret? I don't think so. If you have a secret and are willing to trust me, that would be great; if you choose not to trust me—that's fine too."

"Of course I will trust you. That is why I have come here."

"Of course I trust you. That’s why I’m here."

"Then out with it. I am not a little girl. You need not be bashful. Two and two make four. I know that. But some people want them to make five. I know that too. So speak out what you have to say."

"Just say it. I'm not a little girl. There's no need to be shy. Two plus two equals four. I get that. But some people wish it made five. I know that as well. So just say what you need to say."

"I am going to ask Lady Ongar to—to—to—marry me."

"I’m going to ask Lady Ongar to—to—to—marry me."

"Ah, indeed; with all the thousands of pounds and the beautiful park! But the beautiful hair is more than all the thousands of pounds. Is it not so?"

"Ah, definitely; with all the thousands of pounds and the gorgeous park! But the beautiful hair is worth more than all the thousands of pounds. Isn’t that right?"

"Well, as to that, they all go together, you know."

"Well, regarding that, they all go together, you know."

"And that is so lucky! If they was to be separated, which would you take?"

"And that's so lucky! If they were to be separated, which one would you take?"

The little woman grinned as she asked this question, and Archie, had he at all understood her character, might at once have put himself on a pleasant footing with her; but he was still confused and ill at ease, and only muttered something about the truth of his love for Julia.

The little woman smiled as she asked this question, and Archie, if he had really understood her personality, could have easily gotten on her good side; but he was still anxious and uncomfortable, and only mumbled something about how true his love for Julia was.

"And you want to get her to marry you?"

"And you want her to marry you?"

"Yes; that's just it."

"Yes, that's exactly it."

"And you want me to help you?"

"And you want me to help you?"

"That's just it again."

"That's it again."

"Well?"

"What's up?"

"Upon my word, if you'll stick to me, you know, and see me through it, and all that kind of thing, you'll find in me a most grateful friend;—indeed, a most grateful friend." And Archie, as from his position he was debarred from attempting the smoothing process, began to work with his right forefinger under the glove on his left hand.

"Honestly, if you stay with me and help me out, you'll find a really appreciative friend in me; truly, a very appreciative friend." And since Archie couldn't reach to smooth things over from where he was, he started to use his right forefinger to adjust the glove on his left hand.

"What have you got there?" said Madame Gordeloup, looking at him with all her eyes.

"What do you have there?" Madame Gordeloup asked, staring at him intently.

Captain Clavering instantly discontinued the work with his finger, and became terribly confused. Her voice on asking the question had become very sharp; and it seemed to him that if he brought out his money in that awkward, barefaced way which now seemed to be necessary, she would display all the wrath of which a Russian spy could be capable. Would it not be better that he should let the money rest for the present, and trust to his promise of gratitude? Ah, how he wished that he had slipped at any rate one note between the pages of a book.

Captain Clavering immediately stopped what he was doing and became really flustered. Her voice had turned very sharp when she asked the question, and he felt that if he took out his money in such an awkward and obvious way, she would unleash all the anger a Russian spy could muster. Would it be wiser to let the money sit for now and rely on his promise of gratitude? Oh, how he wished he had at least tucked a note between the pages of a book.

"What have you got there?" she demanded again, very sharply.

"What do you have there?" she asked again, very sharply.

"Oh, nothing."

"Oh, it's nothing."

"It is not nothing. What have you got there? If you have got nothing, take off your glove. Come."

"It’s not nothing. What do you have there? If you have nothing, take off your glove. Come."

Captain Clavering became very red in the face, and was altogether at a loss what to say or do. "Is it money you have got there?" she asked. "Let me see how much. Come."

Captain Clavering turned bright red and didn't know what to say or do. "Is that money you've got there?" she asked. "Let me see how much. Come on."

"It is just a few bank-notes I put in here to be handy," he said.

"It’s just a few bills I put in here for convenience," he said.

"Ah; that is very handy, certainly. I never saw that custom before. Let me look." Then she took his hand, and with her own hooked finger clawed out the notes. "Ah! five, ten, fifteen, twenty pounds. Twenty pounds is not a great deal, but it is very nice to have even that always handy. I was wanting so much money as that myself; perhaps you will make it handy to me."

"Wow, that's really convenient. I've never seen that before. Let me take a look." Then she grabbed his hand and used her finger to pull out the bills. "Wow! Five, ten, fifteen, twenty pounds. Twenty pounds isn't a lot, but it's nice to have that readily available. I could really use that amount right now; maybe you could help me out."

"Upon my word I shall be most happy. Nothing on earth would give me more pleasure."

"Honestly, I’ll be really happy. Nothing in the world would make me happier."

"Fifty pounds would give me more pleasure; just twice as much pleasure." Archie had begun to rejoice greatly at the safe disposition of the money, and to think how excellently well this spy did her business; but now there came upon him suddenly an idea that spies perhaps might do their business too well. "Twenty pounds in this country goes a very little way; you are all so rich," said the Spy.

"Fifty pounds would make me way happier; just twice as happy." Archie started to feel really good about the safe handling of the money and thought about how well this spy was doing her job; but then suddenly he had a thought that maybe spies could do their job a little too well. "Twenty pounds doesn't get you very far in this country; you’re all so wealthy," said the Spy.

"By George, I ain't. I ain't rich, indeed."

"By George, I'm not. I'm not rich, for sure."

"But you mean to be—with Julie's money?"

"But you plan to be—with Julie's money?"

"Oh—ah—yes; and you ought to know, Madame Gordeloup, that I am now the heir to the family estate and title."

"Oh—ah—yes; and you should know, Madame Gordeloup, that I am now the heir to the family estate and title."

"Yes; the poor little baby is dead, in spite of the pills and the powders, the daisies and the buttercups! Poor little baby! I had a baby of my own once, and that died also." Whereupon Madame Gordeloup, putting up her hand to her eyes, wiped away a real tear with the bank-notes which she still held. "And I am to remind Julie that you will be the heir?"

"Yes, the poor little baby is dead, despite the pills and powders, the daisies and buttercups! Poor little baby! I had a baby of my own once, and that one died too." Then Madame Gordeloup, wiping away a real tear with the banknotes she still held, raised her hand to her eyes. "Am I supposed to remind Julie that you'll be the heir?"

"She will know all about that already."

"She already knows all about that."

"But I will tell her. It will be something to say, at any rate,—and that, perhaps, will be the difficulty."

"But I will tell her. It will be something to say, at least—and that might be the challenge."

"Just so! I didn't look at it in that light before."

"Exactly! I hadn't considered it that way before."

"And am I to propose it to her first?"

"And am I supposed to bring it up to her first?"

"Well; I don't know. Perhaps as you are so clever, it might be as well."

"Well, I don't know. Maybe since you're so smart, that could work."

"And at once?"

"Right away?"

"Yes, certainly; at once. You see, Madame Gordeloup, there may be so many buzzing about her."

"Yes, of course; right away. You see, Madame Gordeloup, there could be so many people talking about her."

"Exactly; and some of them perhaps will have more than twenty pounds handy. Some will buzz better than that."

"Exactly; and some of them might have more than twenty pounds available. Some will do even better than that."

"Of course I didn't mean that for anything more than just a little compliment to begin with."

"Of course, I didn't mean that as anything more than just a small compliment to start with."

"Oh, ah; just a little compliment for beginning. And when will it be making a progress and going on?"

"Oh, wow; just a small compliment to start things off. So when will it start making some progress and moving forward?"

"Making a progress!"

"Making progress!"

"Yes; when will the compliment become a little bigger? Twenty pounds! Oh! it's just for a few gloves, you know; nothing more."

"Yeah; when will the compliment get a little bigger? Twenty bucks! Oh! it's just for a few pairs of gloves, you know; nothing more."

"Nothing more than that, of course," said poor Archie.

"Nothing more than that, of course," said poor Archie.

"Well; when will the compliment grow bigger? Let me see. Julie has seven thousands of pounds, what you call, per annum. And have you seen that beautiful park? Oh! And if you can make her to look at the moon with her hair down,—oh! When will that compliment grow bigger? Twenty pounds! I am ashamed, you know."

"Well, when will the compliment get bigger? Let me think. Julie has seven thousand pounds a year. And have you seen that beautiful park? Oh! And if you can get her to look at the moon with her hair down—oh! When will that compliment get bigger? Twenty pounds! I'm ashamed, you know."

"When will you see her, Madame Gordeloup?"

"When are you going to see her, Madame Gordeloup?"

"See her! I see her every day, always. I will be there to-day, and to-morrow, and the next day."

"Look at her! I see her every day, all the time. I will be there today, tomorrow, and the day after."

"You might say a word then at once,—this afternoon."

"You might say a word then right away,—this afternoon."

"What! for twenty pounds! Seven thousands of pounds per annum; and you give me twenty pounds! Fie, Captain Clavering. It is only just for me to speak to you,—this! That is all. Come; when will you bring me fifty?"

"What! For twenty pounds! Seven thousand pounds a year; and you give me twenty pounds! Come on, Captain Clavering. It's only fair that I say this to you—this! That's all. So, when will you bring me fifty?"

"By George—fifty!"

"By George—$50!"

"Yes, fifty;—for another beginning. What; seven thousands of pounds per annum, and make difficulty for fifty pounds! You have a handy way with your glove. Will you come with fifty pounds to-morrow?" Archie, with the drops of perspiration standing on his brow, and now desirous of getting out again into the street, promised that he would come again on the following day with the required sum.

"Yes, fifty;—for another start. What? Seven thousand pounds a year, and you're struggling over fifty pounds! You're quite skilled with your glove. Will you bring fifty pounds tomorrow?" Archie, with beads of sweat on his forehead, eager to get back out to the street, promised that he would return the next day with the needed amount.

"Just for another beginning! And now, good-morning, Captain Clavering. I will do my possible with Julie. Julie is very fond of me, and I think you have been right in coming here. But twenty pounds was too little, even for a beginning." Mercenary wretch; hungry, greedy, ill-conditioned woman,—altogether of the harpy breed! As Archie Clavering looked into her grey eyes, and saw there her greed and her hunger, his flesh crept upon his bones. Should he not succeed with Julia, how much would this excellent lady cost him?

"Here we go again! And now, good morning, Captain Clavering. I’ll do my best with Julie. Julie really likes me, and I think you were right to come here. But twenty pounds is too little, even as a starting point." What a selfish, greedy, ill-tempered woman—definitely a piece of work! As Archie Clavering looked into her grey eyes and saw her desire and hunger, he felt uneasy. If he didn't succeed with Julia, how much would this outstanding lady end up costing him?

As soon as he was gone the excellent lady made an intolerable grimace, shaking herself and shrugging her shoulders, and walking up and down the room with her dirty wrapper held close round her. "Bah," she said. "Bah!" And as she thought of the heavy stupidity of her late visitor she shrugged herself and shook herself again violently, and clutched up her robe still more closely. "Bah!" It was intolerable to her that a man should be such a fool, even though she was to make money by him. And then, that such a man should conceive it to be possible that he should become the husband of a woman with seven thousand pounds a year! Bah!

As soon as he left, the wonderful lady made an awful face, shaking herself and shrugging her shoulders, pacing back and forth in her dirty robe wrapped tightly around her. "Ugh," she said. "Ugh!" And as she thought about the sheer stupidity of her recent visitor, she shrugged and shook herself again vigorously, clutching her robe even tighter. "Ugh!" It was unbearable to her that a man could be such a fool, even if she would profit from him. And then, that such a man could think it was possible to become the husband of a woman with a seven-thousand-pound yearly income! Ugh!

Archie, as he walked away from Mount Street, found it difficult to create a triumphant feeling within his own bosom. He had been awkward, slow, and embarrassed, and the Spy had been too much for him. He was quite aware of that, and he was aware also that even the sagacious Doodles had been wrong. There had, at any rate, been no necessity for making a difficulty about the money. The Russian spy had known her business too well to raise troublesome scruples on that point. That she was very good at her trade he was prepared to acknowledge; but a fear came upon him that he would find the article too costly for his own purposes. He remembered the determined tone in which she had demanded the fifty pounds merely as a further beginning.

Archie, as he walked away from Mount Street, struggled to feel a sense of victory within himself. He had been awkward, slow, and embarrassed, and the Spy had overwhelmed him. He was fully aware of that, and he also recognized that even the wise Doodles had been mistaken. At any rate, there hadn’t been any need to make a fuss about the money. The Russian spy was too skilled at her job to have any troublesome doubts about that. He was willing to admit that she was very good at what she did; however, a worry crept in that her services might be too expensive for his needs. He recalled the firm way she had insisted on fifty pounds just as a starting point.

And then he could not but reflect how much had been said at the interview about money,—about money for her, and how very little had been said as to the assistance to be given,—as to the return to be made for the money. No plan had been laid down, no times fixed, no facilities for making love suggested to him. He had simply paid over his twenty pounds, and been desired to bring another fifty. The other fifty he was to take to Mount Street on the morrow. What if she were to require fifty pounds every day, and declare that she could not stir in the matter for less? Doodles, no doubt, had told him that these first-class Russian spies did well the work for which they were paid; and no doubt, if paid according to her own tariff, Madame Gordeloup would work well for him; but such a tariff as that was altogether beyond his means! It would be imperatively necessary that he should come to some distinct settlement with her as to price. The twenty pounds, of course, were gone; but would it not be better that he should come to some final understanding with her before he gave her the further fifty? But then, as he thought of this, he was aware that she was too clever to allow him to do as he desired. If he went into that room with the fifty pounds in his pockets, or in his glove, or, indeed, anywhere about his person, she would have it from him, let his own resolution to make a previous bargain be what it might. His respect for the woman rose almost to veneration, but with the veneration was mixed a strong feeling of fear.

And then he couldn't help but think about how much was said during the meeting about money—about money for her, and how little was said about the help he would get in return—regarding what to expect for the money. No plan was outlined, no timelines set, and no suggestions were given about how to express his feelings. He had simply handed over his twenty pounds and was asked to bring another fifty. He was supposed to take the other fifty to Mount Street the next day. What if she wanted fifty pounds every day and insisted she couldn't do anything for less? Doodles had likely told him that these top-tier Russian spies did good work for what they were paid; and it was true that if paid according to her rates, Madame Gordeloup would work well for him; but such a rate was completely out of his budget! It was absolutely necessary for him to reach a clear agreement with her about the cost. The twenty pounds, of course, were already spent; but wouldn't it be better to come to a final understanding with her before giving her the additional fifty? However, as he thought about this, he realized she was too smart to let him do what he wanted. If he walked into that room with the fifty pounds in his pockets, in his glove, or anywhere on him, she would get it from him, regardless of how determined he was to negotiate first. His respect for her grew almost into admiration, but along with that admiration came a strong sense of fear.

But, in spite of all this, he did venture to triumph a little when he met Doodles at the club. He had employed the Russian spy, and had paid her twenty pounds, and was enrolled in the corps of diplomatic and mysterious personages, who do their work by mysterious agencies. He did not tell Doodles anything about the glove, or the way in which the money was taken from him; but he did say that he was to see the Spy again to-morrow, and that he intended to take with him another present of fifty pounds.

But despite all this, he couldn't help but feel a bit triumphant when he ran into Doodles at the club. He had hired the Russian spy and paid her twenty pounds, joining the ranks of diplomatic and enigmatic individuals who operate through secret channels. He didn't mention anything to Doodles about the glove or how he had given up the money, but he did say that he was going to meet the spy again tomorrow and that he planned to bring another gift of fifty pounds.

"By George, Clavvy, you are going it!" said Doodles, in a voice that was delightfully envious to the ears of Captain Archie. When he heard that envious tone he felt that he was entitled to be triumphant.

"Wow, Clavvy, you're really going for it!" said Doodles, his voice dripping with envy, which sounded great to Captain Archie. When he heard that envious tone, he felt justified in being triumphant.

 

 

CHAPTER XXV.

"WHAT WOULD MEN SAY OF YOU?"

Harry, tell me the truth,—tell me all the truth." Harry Clavering was thus greeted when in obedience to the summons from Lady Ongar, he went to her almost immediately on his return to London.

HHarry, tell me the truth—tell me everything." Harry Clavering was welcomed this way when, in response to Lady Ongar's request, he went to see her shortly after arriving back in London.

It will be remembered that he had remained at Clavering some days after the departure of Hugh and Archie, lacking the courage to face his misfortunes boldly. But though his delay had been cowardly, it had not been easy to him to be a coward. He despised himself for not having written with warm, full-expressed affection to Florence and with honest clear truth to Julia. Half his misery rose from this feeling of self-abasement, and from the consciousness that he was weak,—piteously weak, exactly in that in which he had often boasted to himself that he was strong. But such inward boastings are not altogether bad. They preserve men from succumbing, and make at any rate some attempt to realize themselves. The man who tells himself that he is brave, will struggle much before he flies; but the man who never does so tell himself, will find flying easy unless his heart be of nature very high. Now had come the moment either for flying, or not flying; and Harry swearing that he would stand his ground, resolutely took his hat and gloves, and made his way to Bolton Street with a sore heart.

He had stayed in Clavering for several days after Hugh and Archie had left, lacking the courage to face his problems head-on. But even though he was being cowardly, it wasn’t easy for him to be one. He hated himself for not writing to Florence with genuine warmth and to Julia with honest clarity. Half of his misery came from this self-loathing and from the awareness that he was weak—pathetically weak, especially in the areas he often bragged about being strong. But such inner bragging isn’t entirely bad. It helps people avoid giving in and at least attempts to help them realize their potential. A person who tells themselves they are brave will fight hard before they give up; but someone who never tells themselves that will find it easy to give up unless their heart is exceptionally strong. Now was the moment to either stand firm or run away; and Harry, resolving to stand his ground, firmly took his hat and gloves and headed to Bolton Street with a heavy heart.

But as he went he could not keep himself from arguing the matter within his own breast. He knew what was his duty. It was his duty to stick to Florence, not only with his word and his hand, but with his heart. It was his duty to tell Lady Ongar that not only his word was at Stratton, but his heart also, and to ask her pardon for the wrong that he had done her by that caress. For some ten minutes as he walked through the streets his resolve was strong to do this manifest duty; but, gradually, as he thought of that caress, as he thought of the difficulties of the coming interview, as he thought of Julia's high-toned beauty,—perhaps something also of her wealth and birth,—and more strongly still as he thought of her love for him, false, treacherous, selfish arguments offered themselves to his mind,—arguments which he knew to be false and selfish. Which of them did he love? Could it be right for him to give his hand without his heart? Could it really be good for Florence,—poor injured Florence, that she should be taken by a man who had ceased to regard her more than all other women? Were he to marry her now, would not that deceit be worse than the other deceit? Or, rather, would not that be deceitful, whereas the other course would simply be unfortunate,—unfortunate through circumstances for which he was blameless? Damnable arguments! False, cowardly logic, by which all male jilts seek to excuse their own treachery to themselves and to others!

But as he walked, he couldn’t help but argue with himself about it. He knew what his duty was. He needed to stay true to Florence, not just in words and actions, but with his heart. He needed to tell Lady Ongar that not only were his words at Stratton, but his heart was too, and he had to ask her forgiveness for the wrong he had done with that embrace. For about ten minutes, as he strolled through the streets, he was resolute in doing this necessary duty; but gradually, as he thought about that embrace, the challenges of the upcoming conversation, Julia’s stunning beauty—maybe also about her wealth and background—and even more so about her love for him, false, deceptive, and selfish thoughts crept into his mind—thoughts he knew were untrue and selfish. Which of them did he truly love? Was it right for him to give his hand without his heart? Would it truly be good for Florence—poor hurt Florence—to be taken by a man who no longer saw her as more than any other woman? If he were to marry her now, wouldn’t that deceit be worse than the previous one? Or rather, wouldn’t that be deceitful, while the other option would simply be unfortunate—unfortunate due to circumstances beyond his control? Despicable arguments! False, cowardly reasoning that all male betrayers use to justify their own treachery to themselves and others!

Thus during the second ten minutes of his walk, his line of conduct became less plain to him, and as he entered Piccadilly he was racked with doubts. But instead of settling them in his mind he unconsciously allowed himself to dwell upon the words with which he would seek to excuse his treachery to Florence. He thought how he would tell her,—not to her face with spoken words, for that he could not do,—but with written skill, that he was unworthy of her goodness, that his love for her had fallen off through his own unworthiness, and had returned to one who was in all respects less perfect than she, but who in old days, as she well knew, had been his first love. Yes! he would say all this, and Julia, let her anger be what it might, should know that he had said it. As he planned this, there came to him a little comfort, for he thought there was something grand in such a resolution. Yes; he would do that, even though he should lose Julia also.

During the second ten minutes of his walk, he became less sure of what to do, and as he entered Piccadilly, doubts overwhelmed him. Instead of resolving them in his mind, he found himself thinking about how he would justify his betrayal to Florence. He imagined how he would explain it to her—not face-to-face, because he couldn’t do that—but with written words, expressing that he was unworthy of her kindness, that his love for her had faded due to his own faults, and had returned to someone who was in every way less perfect than she was, but who, as she knew, had been his first love back in the day. Yes! He would say all this, and no matter how angry Julia might be, she would know he had said it. As he envisioned this, he felt a bit of comfort because he thought there was something noble about such a decision. Yes; he would do that, even if it meant losing Julia too.

Miserable clap-trap! He knew in his heart that all his logic was false, and his arguments baseless. Cease to love Florence Burton! He had not ceased to love her, nor is the heart of any man made so like a weather-cock that it needs must turn itself hither and thither, as the wind directs, and be altogether beyond the man's control. For Harry, with all his faults, and in spite of his present falseness, was a man. No man ceases to love without a cause. No man need cease to love without a cause. A man may maintain his love, and nourish it, and keep it warm by honest manly effort, as he may his probity, his courage, or his honour. It was not that he had ceased to love Florence; but that the glare of the candle had been too bright for him and he had scorched his wings. After all, as to that embrace of which he had thought so much, and the memory of which was so sweet to him and so bitter,—it had simply been an accident. Thus, writing in his mind that letter to Florence which he knew, if he were an honest man, he would never allow himself to write, he reached Lady Ongar's door without having arranged for himself any special line of conduct.

Miserable nonsense! He knew deep down that all his reasoning was wrong and his arguments were empty. Stop loving Florence Burton? He hadn’t stopped loving her, nor is a man’s heart like a weather vane that it can just turn this way and that based on the wind, completely out of the man’s control. Harry, with all his flaws and despite his current dishonesty, was still a man. No man stops loving without a reason. A man doesn’t have to stop loving without a reason. A man can keep his love alive, nurture it, and keep it warm through genuine effort, just like he would with his integrity, bravery, or honor. It wasn’t that he had stopped loving Florence; it was just that the brightness of the candle had been too much for him, and he had burned his wings. In the end, regarding that embrace he had thought so much about, which was both so sweet and so painful for him — it had merely been an accident. So, while mentally drafting that letter to Florence which he knew, if he were being honest, he would never let himself actually write, he arrived at Lady Ongar's door without having figured out any specific plan of action for himself.

We must return for a moment to the fact that Hugh and Archie had returned to town before Harry Clavering. How Archie had been engaged on great doings, the reader, I hope, will remember; and he may as well be informed here that the fifty pounds were duly taken to Mount Street, and were extracted from him by the Spy without much difficulty. I do not know that Archie in return obtained any immediate aid or valuable information from Sophie Gordeloup; but Sophie did obtain some information from him which she found herself able to use for her own purposes. As his position with reference to love and marriage was being discussed, and the position also of the divine Julia, Sophie hinted her fear of another Clavering lover. What did Archie think of his cousin Harry? "Why; he's engaged to another girl," said Archie, opening wide his eyes and his mouth, and becoming very free with his information. This was a matter to which Sophie found it worth her while to attend, and she soon learned from Archie all that Archie knew about Florence Burton. And this was all that could be known. No secret had been made in the family of Harry's engagement. Archie told his fair assistant that Miss Burton had been received at Clavering Park openly as Harry's future wife, and, "by Jove, you know, he can't be coming it with Julia after that, you know." Sophie made a little grimace, but did not say much. She, remembering that she had caught Lady Ongar in Harry's arms, thought that, "by Jove," he might be coming it with Julia, even after Miss Burton's reception at Clavering Park. Then, too, she remembered some few words that had passed between her and her dear Julia after Harry's departure on the evening of the embrace, and perceived that Julia was in ignorance of the very existence of Florence Burton, even though Florence had been received at the Park. This was information worth having,—information to be used! Her respect for Harry rose immeasurably. She had not given him credit for so much audacity, so much gallantry, and so much skill. She had thought him to be a pigheaded Clavering, like the rest of them. He was not pigheaded; he was a promising young man; she could have liked him and perhaps aided him,—only that he had shown so strong a determination to have nothing to do with her. Therefore the information should be used;—and: it was used.

We need to take a moment to remember that Hugh and Archie got back to town before Harry Clavering. I hope you recall what big things Archie had been involved in; it's worth noting that the fifty pounds were taken to Mount Street and extracted from him by the Spy without much trouble. I’m not sure Archie got any immediate help or useful information from Sophie Gordeloup, but Sophie did get some info from him that she found useful for her own plans. As they were discussing love and marriage, including Julia’s situation, Sophie expressed her concern about another Clavering being interested in Harry. What did Archie think of his cousin Harry? "Well, he's engaged to another girl," Archie said, widening his eyes and mouth, and generously sharing information. This was something Sophie felt was important, and she quickly learned from Archie everything he knew about Florence Burton. And that was pretty much all there was to know. Harry's engagement was no secret in the family. Archie informed his lovely accomplice that Miss Burton had been openly accepted at Clavering Park as Harry's future wife, and, "by the way, he can’t be flirting with Julia after that, you know." Sophie made a little face but didn’t say much. Remembering that she had caught Lady Ongar in Harry’s arms, she thought that, "by the way," he might still be interested in Julia, even after Miss Burton's welcome at Clavering Park. Plus, she recalled a few words exchanged between her and her dear Julia after Harry had left on the night of the embrace, and realized that Julia had no idea Florence Burton even existed, even though Florence had been welcomed at the Park. This was valuable information—something to use! Her respect for Harry grew immensely. She hadn’t thought he had such boldness, charm, and skill. She had seen him as just another stubborn Clavering like the rest. He wasn’t stubborn; he was a promising young man. She could have liked him and maybe even helped him—if he hadn’t been so determined to steer clear of her. So the information should be put to use; and it was.

The reader will now understand what was the truth which Lady Ongar demanded from Harry Clavering. "Harry, tell me the truth; tell me all the truth." She had come forward to meet him in the middle of the room when she spoke these words, and stood looking him in the face, not having given him her hand.

The reader will now understand what truth Lady Ongar expected from Harry Clavering. "Harry, tell me the truth; tell me everything." She had stepped forward to meet him in the center of the room when she said this, standing there and looking him in the eye, without offering her hand.

"What truth?" said Harry. "Have I ever told you a lie?" But he knew well what was the truth required of him.

"What truth?" Harry said. "Have I ever lied to you?" But he knew exactly what truth was being asked of him.

"Lies can be acted as well as told. Harry, tell me all at once. Who is Florence Burton; who and what?" She knew it all, then, and things had settled themselves for him without the necessity of any action on his part. It was odd enough that she should not have learned it before, but at any rate she knew it now. And it was well that she should have been told;—only how was he to excuse himself for that embrace? "At any rate speak to me," she said, standing quite erect, and looking as a Juno might have looked. "You will acknowledge at least that I have a right to ask the question. Who is this Florence Burton?"

"Lies can be acted out as well as told. Harry, just tell me everything at once. Who is Florence Burton? Who is she and what does she mean?" She must have known everything already, and things had worked themselves out for him without him having to do anything. It was strange she hadn't found out sooner, but at least she knew now. And it was good that she had been informed;—but how could he justify that embrace? "Regardless, speak to me," she said, standing tall and looking as regal as a Juno. "You have to admit that I have the right to ask this. Who is this Florence Burton?"

"She is the daughter of Mr. Burton of Stratton."

"She is the daughter of Mr. Burton from Stratton."

"And is that all that you can tell me? Come, Harry, be braver than that. I was not such a coward once with you. Are you engaged to marry her?"

"And is that all you can tell me? Come on, Harry, be braver than that. I wasn't so cowardly with you before. Are you planning to marry her?"

"Yes, Lady Ongar, I am."

"Yes, Lady Ongar, I am."

"Then you have had your revenge on me, and now we are quits." So saying, she stepped back from the middle of the room, and sat herself down on her accustomed seat. He was left there standing, and it seemed as though she intended to take no further notice of him. He might go if he pleased, and there would be an end of it all. The difficulty would be over, and he might at once write to Florence in what language he liked. It would simply be a little episode in his life, and his escape would not have been arduous.

"Then you've gotten your revenge on me, and we're even now." With that, she stepped back from the center of the room and sat down in her usual spot. He was left standing there, and it felt like she had no intention of acknowledging him further. He could leave if he wanted, and that would be the end of everything. The problem would be resolved, and he could write to Florence in whatever way he preferred. It would just be a minor chapter in his life, and getting away wouldn't have been difficult.

But he could not go from her in that way. He could not bring himself to leave the room without some further word. She had spoken of revenge. Was it not incumbent on him to explain to her that there had been no revenge; that he had loved, and suffered, and forgiven without one thought of anger;—and that then he had unfortunately loved again? Must he not find some words in which to tell her that she had been the light, and he simply the poor moth that had burned his wings?

But he couldn’t just leave like that. He couldn’t walk out of the room without saying something more. She had mentioned revenge. Shouldn’t he explain to her that there had been no revenge; that he had loved, suffered, and forgiven without a hint of anger;—and that then he had unfortunately loved again? Didn’t he need to find some way to tell her that she had been the light, and he was just the poor moth that had burned his wings?

"No, Lady Ongar," said he, "there has been no revenge."

"No, Lady Ongar," he said, "there's been no revenge."

"We will call it justice, if you please. At any rate I do not mean to complain."

"We can call it justice, if you want. Anyway, I’m not going to complain."

"If you ever injured me—" he began.

"If you ever hurt me—" he started.

"I did injure you," said she, sharply.

"I did hurt you," she said sharply.

"If you ever injured me, I forgave you freely."

"If you ever hurt me, I forgive you without hesitation."

"I did injure you—" As she spoke she rose again from her seat, showing how impossible to her was that tranquillity which she had attempted to maintain. "I did injure you, but the injury came to you early in life, and sat lightly on you. Within a few months you had learned to love this young lady at the place you went to,—the first young lady you saw! I had not done you much harm, Harry. But that which you have done me cannot be undone."

"I did hurt you—" As she spoke, she stood up from her seat, showing how impossible it was for her to maintain the calm she had tried to keep. "I did hurt you, but the hurt came early in your life and didn’t weigh heavily on you. Within a few months, you had learned to love this young woman at the place you went to—the first young woman you saw! I didn’t do you much damage, Harry. But what you have done to me cannot be changed."

"Julia," he said, coming up to her.

"Julia," he said, walking over to her.

"No; not Julia. When you were here before I asked you to call me so, hoping, longing, believing,—doing more, so much more than I could have done, but that I thought my love might now be of service to you. You do not think that I had heard of this then?"

"No; not Julia. When you were here before, I asked you to call me that, hoping, longing, believing—doing more, so much more than I could have done, but I thought my love might now be of help to you. You don't think I heard about this back then?"

"Oh, no."

"Oh no."

"No. It is odd that I should not have known it, as I now hear that she was at my sister's house; but all others have not been as silent as you have been. We are quits, Harry; that is all that I have to say. We are quits now."

"No. It's strange that I didn't know this since I now hear she was at my sister's house; but everyone else hasn't been as quiet as you. We're even, Harry; that's all I have to say. We're even now."

"I have intended to be true to you;—to you and to her."

"I've meant to be honest with you—both you and her."

"Were you true when you acted as you did the other night?" He could not explain to her how greatly he had been tempted. "Were you true when you held me in your arms as that woman came in? Had you not made me think that I might glory in loving you, and that I might show her that I scorned her when she thought to promise me her secrecy;—her secrecy, as though I were ashamed of what she had seen. I was not ashamed,—not then. Had all the world known it, I should not have been ashamed. 'I have loved him long,' I should have said, 'and him only. He is to be my husband, and now at last I need not be ashamed.'" So much she spoke, standing up, looking at him with firm face, and uttering her syllables with a quick clear voice; but at the last word there came a quiver in her tone, and the strength of her countenance quailed, and there was a tear which made dim her eye, and she knew that she could no longer stand before him. She endeavoured to seat herself with composure; but the attempt failed, and as she fell back upon the sofa he just heard the sob which had cost her so great and vain an effort to restrain. In an instant he was kneeling at her feet, and grasping at the hand with which she was hiding her face. "Julia," he said, "look at me; let us at any rate understand each other at last."

"Were you being honest when you acted like that the other night?" He couldn't explain to her how much he had been tempted. "Were you being honest when you held me in your arms while that woman walked in? Didn't you make me believe that I could take pride in loving you, and that I could show her that I scorned her when she thought she could promise me her secrecy—her secrecy, as if I were ashamed of what she saw? I wasn't ashamed—not then. If the whole world had known, I wouldn't have been ashamed. 'I've loved him for a long time,' I would have said, 'and only him. He's going to be my husband, and now I don't need to feel ashamed.'" She spoke so much, standing tall, looking at him with a firm expression, and speaking clearly and quickly; but with the last word, her voice trembled, and the strength in her face faded, and a tear blurred her vision, and she realized she could no longer stand before him. She tried to sit down calmly, but it didn't work, and as she sank back onto the sofa, he barely caught the sob that had taken her so much effort to hold back. In an instant, he was kneeling at her feet, reaching for the hand that was covering her face. "Julia," he said, "look at me; let's at least understand each other for once."

"No, Harry; there must be no more such knowledge,—no more such understanding. You must go from me, and come here no more. Had it not been for that other night, I would still have endeavoured to regard you as a friend. But I have no right to such friendship. I have sinned and gone astray, and am a thing vile and polluted. I sold myself, as a beast is sold, and men have treated me as I treated myself."

"No, Harry; there can’t be any more of this knowledge—no more of this understanding. You need to leave me and not come back. If it weren’t for that other night, I would have still tried to see you as a friend. But I don’t deserve that kind of friendship. I have sinned and gone off track, and I am something shameful and damaged. I sold myself, like a beast is sold, and people have treated me the way I treated myself."

"Have I treated you so?"

"Have I treated you this way?"

"Yes, Harry; you, you. How did you treat me when you took me in your arms and kissed me,—knowing, knowing that I was not to be your wife? O God, I have sinned. I have sinned, and I am punished."

"Yes, Harry; you, you. How did you treat me when you held me in your arms and kissed me,—knowing, knowing that I wasn’t going to be your wife? Oh God, I have sinned. I have sinned, and I am being punished."

"No, no," said he, rising from his knees, "it was not as you say."

"No, no," he said, getting up from his knees, "that's not how it was."

"Then how was it, sir? Is it thus that you treat other women;—your friends, those to whom you declare friendship? What did you mean me to think?"

"Then how was it, sir? Is this how you treat other women—your friends, those you call friends? What did you want me to think?"

"That I loved you."

"I loved you."

"Yes; with a love that should complete my disgrace,—that should finish my degradation. But I had not heard of this Florence Burton; and, Harry, that night I was so happy in my bed. And in that next week when you were down there for that sad ceremony, I was happy here, happy and proud. Yes, Harry, I was so proud when I thought that you still loved me,—loved me in spite of my past sin, that I almost forgot that I was polluted. You have made me remember it, and I shall not forget it again."

"Yes; with a love that should seal my disgrace,—that should complete my downfall. But I hadn't heard of this Florence Burton; and, Harry, that night I was so happy in my bed. And in the following week when you were down there for that sad ceremony, I was happy here, happy and proud. Yes, Harry, I felt so proud when I thought that you still loved me,—loved me despite my past mistakes, that I almost forgot about my shortcomings. You’ve made me remember it, and I won’t forget it again."

It would have been better for him had he gone away at once. Now he was sitting in a chair, sobbing violently, and pressing away the tears from his cheeks with his hands. How could he make her understand that he had intended no insult when he embraced her? Was it not incumbent on him to tell her that the wrong he then did was done to Florence Burton, and not to her? But his agony was too much for him at present, and he could find no words in which to speak to her.

It would have been better for him if he had left right away. Now he was sitting in a chair, crying hard, and wiping tears from his cheeks with his hands. How could he make her understand that he meant no harm when he hugged her? Shouldn't he tell her that the wrong he did was to Florence Burton, not to her? But his pain was too overwhelming at the moment, and he couldn't find the words to say to her.

"I said to myself that you would come when the funeral was over, and I wept for poor Hermy as I thought that my lot was so much happier than hers. But people have what they deserve, and Hermy, who has done no such wrong as I have done, is not crushed as I am crushed. It was just, Harry, that the punishment should come from you, but it has come very heavily."

"I told myself you would show up after the funeral, and I cried for poor Hermy, thinking my life was so much better than hers. But people get what they deserve, and Hermy, who hasn’t done anything as wrong as I have, isn't as devastated as I am. It felt fair, Harry, that the punishment would come from you, but it has hit me really hard."

"Julia, it was not meant to be so."

"Julia, it wasn't supposed to be like this."

"Well; we will let that pass. I cannot unsay, Harry, all that I have said;—all that I did not say, but which you must have thought and known when you were here last. I cannot bid you believe that I do not—love you."

"Alright; let's move on. I can't take back everything I've said, Harry,—all those things I didn't say, but you must have thought and known when you were here last. I can't make you believe that I don't—love you."

"Not more tenderly or truly than I love you."

"Not more tenderly or truly than I love you."

"Nay, Harry, your love to me can be neither true nor tender,—nor will I permit it to be offered to me. You do not think I would rob that girl of what is hers. Mine for you may be both tender and true; but, alas, truth has come to me when it can avail me no longer."

"Nah, Harry, your love for me can’t be real or genuine—and I won’t let you give it to me. You really think I’d take what belongs to that girl? My feelings for you can be both genuine and sincere; but, unfortunately, the truth has hit me when it can’t help me anymore."

"Julia, if you will say that you love me, it shall avail you."

"Julia, if you say you love me, it will benefit you."

"In saying that, you are continuing to ill-treat me. Listen to me now. I hardly know when it began, for, at first, I did not expect that you would forgive me and let me be dear to you as I used to be; but as you sat here, looking up into my face in the old way, it came on me gradually,—the feeling that it might be so; and I told myself that if you would take me I might be of service to you, and I thought that I might forgive myself at last for possessing this money if I could throw it into your lap, so that you might thrive with it in the world; and I said to myself that it might be well to wait awhile, till I should see whether you really loved me; but then came that burst of passion, and though I knew that you were wrong, I was proud to feel that I was still so dear to you. It is all over. We understand each other at last, and you may go. There is nothing to be forgiven between us."

"In saying that, you're still treating me badly. Listen to me now. I can't even remember when it started, because at first, I didn’t think you would forgive me and let me be as close to you as I used to be. But as you sat here, looking up at me the way you used to, it slowly hit me—the feeling that it could be possible. I told myself that if you would accept me, I could help you, and I thought that I might finally forgive myself for having this money if I could give it to you, so you could succeed in life. I figured it would be good to wait a bit, to see if you really loved me. But then that surge of passion hit me, and even though I knew you were wrong, I felt proud to realize that I still meant so much to you. It's all over now. We finally understand each other, and you can go. There’s nothing left to forgive between us."

He had now resolved that Florence must go by the board. If Julia would still take him she should be his wife, and he would face Florence and all the Burtons, and his own family, and all the world in the matter of his treachery. What would he care what the world might say? His treachery to Florence was a thing completed. Now, at this moment, he felt himself to be so devoted to Julia as to make him regard his engagement to Florence as one which must, at all hazards, be renounced. He thought of his mother's sorrow, of his father's scorn,—of the dismay with which Fanny would hear concerning him a tale which she would believe to be so impossible; he thought of Theodore Burton, and the deep, unquenchable anger of which that brother was capable, and of Cecilia and her outraged kindness; he thought of the infamy which would be attached to him, and resolved that he must bear it all. Even if his own heart did not move him so to act, how could he hinder himself from giving comfort and happiness to this woman who was before him? Injury, wrong, and broken-hearted wretchedness, he could not prevent; but, therefore, this part was as open to him as the other. Men would say that he had done this for Lady Ongar's money; and the indignation with which he was able to regard this false accusation,—for his mind declared such accusation to be damnably false,—gave him some comfort. People might say of him what they pleased. He was about to do the best within his power. Bad, alas, was the best, but it was of no avail now to think of that.

He had now decided that Florence had to be left behind. If Julia was still willing to be with him, she would be his wife, and he would confront Florence, the Burtons, his own family, and everyone else about his betrayal. What would he care about what the world thought? His betrayal of Florence was a done deal. At this moment, he felt so devoted to Julia that he saw his engagement to Florence as something that must be ended, no matter the cost. He thought about his mother’s sadness, his father’s disdain, and how shocked Fanny would be to hear a story she would consider unimaginable; he thought of Theodore Burton and the deep, unyielding anger his brother could hold, and of Cecilia and her hurt feelings; he thought of the disgrace that would come to him and resolved that he had to endure it all. Even if his own feelings didn’t push him to act, how could he stop himself from bringing comfort and happiness to the woman in front of him? He couldn’t prevent the harm, betrayal, and heartbreak, but this choice was just as available to him as any other. People would say he had done this for Lady Ongar’s money; and the anger he felt towards that false accusation—because he knew it was completely untrue—made him feel a bit better. People could say whatever they wanted about him. He was going to do the best he could. Unfortunately, the “best” was still not great, but it was too late to dwell on that now.

"Julia," he said, "between us at least there shall be nothing to be forgiven."

"Julia," he said, "at least between us, there won't be anything to forgive."

"There is nothing," said she.

"There's nothing," she said.

"And there shall be no broken love. I am true to you now,—as ever."

"And there won't be any broken love. I'm loyal to you now—just like always."

"And, what, then, of your truth to Miss Florence Burton?"

"And what about your truth to Miss Florence Burton?"

"It will not be for you to rebuke me with that. We have, both of us, played our game badly, but not for that reason need we both be ruined and broken-hearted. In your folly you thought that wealth was better than love; and I, in my folly,—I thought that one love blighted might be mended by another. When I asked Miss Burton to be my wife you were the wife of another man. Now that you are free again I cannot marry Miss Burton."

"It’s not your place to scold me for that. We’ve both made mistakes, but that doesn’t mean we both need to end up ruined and heartbroken. In your foolishness, you believed that money was more important than love; and I, in my own foolishness, thought that one broken love could be fixed by another. When I asked Miss Burton to be my wife, you were married to someone else. Now that you’re free again, I can’t marry Miss Burton."

"You must marry her, Harry."

"You have to marry her, Harry."

"There shall be no must in such a case. You do not know her, and cannot understand how good, how perfect she is. She is too good to take a hand without a heart."

"There shouldn't be any obligation in this situation. You don't know her and can't fully grasp how good and perfect she is. She's too amazing to accept help without genuine feelings."

"And what would men say of you?"

"And what would people say about you?"

"I must bear what men say. I do not suppose that I shall be all happy,—not even with your love. When things have once gone wrong they cannot be mended without showing the patches. But yet men stay the hand of ruin for a while, tinkering here and putting in a nail there, stitching and cobbling; and so things are kept together. It must be so for you and me. Give me your hand, Julia, for I have never deceived you, and you need not fear that I shall do so now. Give me your hand, and say that you will be my wife."

"I have to deal with what people say. I don’t think I’ll ever be completely happy—not even with your love. Once things have gone wrong, they can’t be fixed without showing the flaws. But still, people hold off the downfall for a while, patching things up here and nailing things down there, stitching and repairing; and so, things stay together. It has to be that way for us. Take my hand, Julia, because I’ve never lied to you, and you don’t need to worry that I’ll start now. Take my hand and say that you’ll be my wife."

"No, Harry; not your wife. I do not, as you say, know that perfect girl, but I will not rob one that is so good."

"No, Harry; not your wife. I don’t, as you put it, know that perfect girl, but I won’t take away someone who is so good."

"You are bound to me, Julia. You must do as I bid you. You have told me that you love me; and I have told you,—and I tell you now, that I love none other as I love you;—have never loved any other as I have loved you. Give me your hand." Then, coming to her, he took her hand, while she sat with her face averted from him. "Tell me that you will be my wife." But she would not say the words. She was less selfish than he, and was thinking,—was trying to think what might be best for them all, but, above all, what might be best for him. "Speak to me," he said, "and acknowledge that you wronged me when you thought that the expression of my love was an insult to you."

"You’re tied to me, Julia. You have to do what I ask. You’ve told me that you love me, and I’ve told you—and I’m telling you now—that I don’t love anyone else like I love you; I’ve never loved anyone else the way I love you. Give me your hand." Then, coming closer, he took her hand while she sat with her face turned away from him. "Tell me that you’ll be my wife." But she wouldn’t say the words. She was less self-centered than he was and was thinking—trying to figure out what might be best for them all, but especially what might be best for him. "Talk to me," he said, "and admit that you hurt me when you thought that my love was an insult to you."

"It is easy to say, speak. What shall I say?"

"It’s easy to talk. What should I say?"

"Say that you will be my wife."

"Say that you'll be my wife."

"No,—I will not say it." She rose again from her chair, and took her hand away from him. "I will not say it. Go now and think over all that you have done; and I also will think of it. God help me. What evil comes, when evil has been done! But, Harry, I understand you now, and I at least will blame you no more. Go and see Florence Burton; and if, when you see her, you find that you can love her, take her to your heart, and be true to her. You shall never hear another reproach from me. Go now, go; there is nothing more to be said."

"No, I won’t say it." She stood up from her chair and pulled her hand away from him. "I won’t say it. Go now and think about everything you’ve done; I’ll think about it too. God help me. What trouble follows when wrong has been done! But, Harry, I understand you now, and I won’t blame you anymore. Go and see Florence Burton; if, when you see her, you find that you can love her, embrace her and be faithful to her. You won’t hear another word of reproach from me. Go now, go; there’s nothing more to say."

He paused a moment as though he were going to speak, but he left the room without another word. As he went along the passage and turned on the stairs he saw her standing at the door of the room, looking at him, and it seemed that her eyes were imploring him to be true to her in spite of the words that she had spoken. "And I will be true to her," he said to himself. "She was the first that I ever loved, and I will be true to her."

He paused for a moment as if he was about to say something, but then he left the room without saying another word. As he walked down the hallway and turned on the stairs, he saw her standing at the door, looking at him, and it seemed like her eyes were begging him to stay loyal to her despite what she had said. "And I will be loyal to her," he told himself. "She was the first person I ever loved, and I will be loyal to her."

He went out, and for an hour or two wandered about the town, hardly knowing whither his steps were taking him. There had been a tragic seriousness in what had occurred to him this evening, which seemed to cover him with care, and make him feel that his youth was gone from him. At any former period of his life his ears would have tingled with pride to hear such a woman as Lady Ongar speak of her love for him in such terms as she had used; but there was no room now for pride in his bosom. Now at least he thought nothing of her wealth or rank. He thought of her as a woman between whom and himself there existed so strong a passion as to make it impossible that he should marry another, even though his duty plainly required it. The grace and graciousness of his life were over; but love still remained to him, and of that he must make the most. All others whom he regarded would revile him, and now he must live for this woman alone. She had said that she had injured him. Yes, indeed, she had injured him! She had robbed him of his high character, of his unclouded brow, of that self-pride which had so often told him that he was living a life without reproach among men. She had brought him to a state in which misery must be his bedfellow, and disgrace his companion;—but still she loved him, and to that love he would be true.

He went out and spent an hour or two wandering around town, hardly knowing where his feet were taking him. What had happened to him that evening felt tragically serious, making him feel weighed down and that his youth was gone. At any other time in his life, he would have felt proud to hear a woman like Lady Ongar express her love for him in such a way; but now, there was no room for pride in his heart. He didn’t care about her wealth or status anymore. He saw her as a woman with whom he shared such a strong passion that it would be impossible for him to marry anyone else, even if it was his duty to do so. The charm and elegance of his previous life were over, but he still had love, and he intended to make the most of it. Everyone else he cared about would criticize him, and now he had to live for this woman alone. She had claimed that she had hurt him. Yes, she had definitely hurt him! She had taken away his good reputation, his clear conscience, and that self-respect that always reminded him he was living a life free of shame. She had brought him to a point where misery would be his constant companion and disgrace would follow him; yet, she still loved him, and he would remain loyal to that love.

And as to Florence Burton;—how was he to settle matters with her? That letter for which he had been preparing the words as he went to Bolton Street, before the necessity for it had become irrevocable, did not now appear to him to be very easy. At any rate he did not attempt it on that night.

And regarding Florence Burton—how was he supposed to handle things with her? The letter he had been getting ready to write on his way to Bolton Street, before it became absolutely necessary, didn't seem that easy to him now. At the very least, he didn't try to write it that night.

 

 

CHAPTER XXVI.

THE MAN WHO DUSTED HIS BOOTS WITH HIS HANDKERCHIEF.

When Florence Burton had written three letters to Harry without receiving a word in reply to either of them, she began to be seriously unhappy. The last of these letters, received by him after the scene described in the last chapter, he had been afraid to read. It still remained unopened in his pocket. But Florence, though she was unhappy, was not even yet jealous. Her fears did not lie in that direction, nor had she naturally any tendency to such uneasiness. He was ill, she thought; or if not ill in health, then ill at ease. Some trouble afflicted him of which he could not bring himself to tell her the facts, and as she thought of this she remembered her own stubbornness on the subject of their marriage, and blamed herself in that she was not now with him, to comfort him. If such comfort would avail him anything now, she would be stubborn no longer. When the third letter brought no reply she wrote to her sister-in-law, Mrs. Burton, confessing her uneasiness, and begging for comfort. Surely Cecilia could not but see him occasionally,—or at any rate have the power of seeing him. Or Theodore might do so,—as of course he would be at the office. If anything ailed him would Cecilia tell her all the truth? But Cecilia, when she began to fear that something did ail him, did not find it very easy to tell Florence all the truth.

When Florence Burton had written three letters to Harry without getting a single response, she started to feel really unhappy. The last letter, which he received after the incident described in the previous chapter, scared him so much that he didn't want to read it. It stayed unopened in his pocket. But even though Florence was feeling low, she wasn't jealous. She didn’t have any worries in that direction and wasn’t naturally inclined to feel that way. She thought he was unwell; if not physically sick, then definitely troubled. He was dealing with something he couldn't bring himself to share with her, and as she considered this, she remembered her own stubbornness about their marriage and felt guilty for not being there to support him. If her presence could help him at all, she wouldn’t hold back any longer. After the third letter went unanswered, she wrote to her sister-in-law, Mrs. Burton, expressing her concerns and asking for reassurance. Surely Cecilia must see him now and then—or at the very least, could if she wanted to. Theodore might see him too since he would be at the office. If something was wrong, would Cecilia tell her the whole truth? However, when Cecilia started to suspect that something was indeed wrong, she found it hard to share everything with Florence.

But there was jealousy at Stratton, though Florence was not jealous. Old Mrs. Burton had become alarmed, and was ready to tear the eyes out of Harry Clavering's head if Harry should be false to her daughter. This was a misfortune of which, with all her brood, Mrs. Burton had as yet known nothing. No daughter of hers had been misused by any man, and no son of hers had ever misused any one's daughter. Her children had gone out into the world steadily, prudently, making no brilliant marriages, but never falling into any mistakes. She heard of such misfortunes around her,—that a young lady here had loved in vain, and that a young lady there had been left to wear the willow; but such sorrows had never visited her roof, and she was disposed to think,—and perhaps to say,—that the fault lay chiefly in the imprudence of mothers. What if at last, when her work in this line had been so nearly brought to a successful close, misery and disappointment should come also upon her lamb! In such case Mrs. Burton, we may say, was a ewe who would not see her lamb suffer without many bleatings and considerable exercise of her maternal energies.

But there was jealousy at Stratton, even though Florence wasn’t jealous. Old Mrs. Burton was getting worried and was ready to tear Harry Clavering apart if he ever betrayed her daughter. This was a misfortune that Mrs. Burton, along with all her kids, had never experienced before. None of her daughters had ever been mistreated by a man, and none of her sons had ever mistreated someone else's daughter. Her children had gone out into the world steadily and wisely, making no flashy marriages, but also avoiding any big mistakes. She heard about such misfortunes around her—like a young woman here who loved without hope and another young woman there who was left to mourn—but such sadness had never come to her home, and she was inclined to think—and maybe even say—that the fault mostly lay with careless mothers. What if, after coming so close to a successful end in this area, her own dear child should also face misery and disappointment? In that case, we can say that Mrs. Burton was a mother who wouldn’t let her child suffer without a lot of noise and considerable use of her maternal instincts.

And tidings had come to Mrs. Burton which had not as yet been allowed to reach Florence's ears. In the office at the Adelphi was one Mr. Walliker, who had a younger brother now occupying that desk in Mr. Burton's office which had belonged to Harry Clavering. Through Bob Walliker, Mrs. Burton learned that Harry did not come to the office even when it was known that he had returned to London from Clavering;—and she also learned at last that the young men in the office were connecting Harry Clavering's name with that of the rich and noble widow, Lady Ongar. Then Mrs. Burton wrote to her son Theodore, as Florence had written to Theodore's wife.

And news had reached Mrs. Burton that hadn't yet been shared with Florence. In the office at the Adelphi was a Mr. Walliker, whose younger brother was now at the desk in Mr. Burton's office that once belonged to Harry Clavering. Through Bob Walliker, Mrs. Burton discovered that Harry was not coming into the office, even though it was known he had returned to London from Clavering;—and she also finally found out that the young men in the office were linking Harry Clavering with the wealthy and noble widow, Lady Ongar. Then Mrs. Burton wrote to her son Theodore, just as Florence had written to Theodore's wife.

Mrs. Burton, though she had loved Harry dearly, and had perhaps in many respects liked him better than any of her sons-in-law, had, nevertheless, felt some misgivings from the first. Florence was brighter, better educated, and cleverer than her elder sisters, and therefore when it had come to pass that she was asked in marriage by a man somewhat higher in rank and softer in manners than they who had married her sisters, there had seemed to be some reason for the change;—but Mrs. Burton had felt that it was a ground for apprehension. High rank and soft manners may not always belong to a true heart. At first she was unwilling to hint this caution even to herself; but at last, as her suspicions grew, she spoke the words very frequently, not only to herself but also to her husband. Why, oh why, had she let into her house any man differing in mode of life from those whom she had known to be honest and good? How would her gray hairs be made to go in sorrow to the grave, if, after all her old prudence and all her old success, her last pet lamb should be returned to the mother's side, ill-used, maimed, and blighted!

Mrs. Burton, even though she had loved Harry dearly and probably liked him more than any of her sons-in-law, still had some doubts from the beginning. Florence was smarter, better educated, and more clever than her older sisters. So when a man who was of a higher social status and had gentler manners than those who had married her sisters asked for her hand, it seemed there was a reason for this change; but Mrs. Burton felt it was a cause for concern. High status and gentle manners don’t always come with a genuine heart. At first, she was reluctant to even acknowledge this warning to herself, but eventually, as her worries grew, she found herself saying these words often, not just to herself but also to her husband. Why, oh why, had she allowed into her home a man so different in lifestyle from those she knew to be honest and good? How would her gray hair be filled with sorrow on her way to the grave if, after all her past caution and success, her last cherished child returned to her, mistreated, harmed, and ruined?

Theodore Burton, when he received his mother's letter, had not seen Harry since his return from Clavering. He had been inclined to be very angry with him for his long and unannounced absence from the office. "He will do no good," he had said to his wife. "He does not know what real work means." But his anger turned to disgust as regarded Harry, and almost to despair as regarded his sister, when Harry had been a week in town and yet had not shown himself at the Adelphi. But at this time Theodore Burton had heard no word of Lady Ongar, though the clerks in the office had that name daily in their mouths. "Cannot you go to him, Theodore?" said his wife. "It is very easy to say go to him," he replied. "If I made it my business I could, of course, go to him, and no doubt find him if I was determined to do so;—but what more could I do? I can lead a horse to the water, but I cannot make him drink." "You could speak to him of Florence." "That is such a woman's idea," said the husband. "When every proper incentive to duty and ambition has failed him, he is to be brought into the right way by the mention of a girl's name!" "May I see him?" Cecilia urged. "Yes,—if you can catch him; but I do not advise you to try."

Theodore Burton, upon receiving his mother’s letter, hadn’t seen Harry since he got back from Clavering. He had been really angry at him for being away from the office for so long without notice. “He won’t accomplish anything,” he told his wife. “He doesn’t understand what real work is.” But his anger turned into disgust when he thought about Harry, and almost into despair when he thought about his sister, especially since Harry had been in town for a week and still hadn’t come by the Adelphi. At this point, Theodore Burton hadn’t heard anything about Lady Ongar, even though the clerks in the office mentioned her name every day. “Can’t you go see him, Theodore?” his wife asked. “It’s easy to say go see him,” he replied. “If I really wanted to, I could definitely find him; but what else could I do? I can lead a horse to water, but I can’t make it drink.” “You could talk to him about Florence.” “That’s such a woman’s perspective,” said the husband. “When every reasonable motivation for duty and ambition has failed him, he’s supposed to be steered in the right direction just by mentioning a girl’s name!” “Can I see him?” Cecilia pressed. “Sure—if you can find him, but I wouldn’t recommend trying.”

After that came the two letters for the husband and wife, each of which was shown to the other; and then for the first time did either of them receive the idea that Lady Ongar with her fortune might be a cause of misery to their sister. "I don't believe a word of it," said Cecilia, whose cheeks were burning, half with shame and half with anger. Harry had been such a pet with her,—had already been taken so closely to her heart as a brother! "I should not have suspected him of that kind of baseness," said Theodore, very slowly. "He is not base," said Cecilia. "He may be idle and foolish, but he is not base."

After that, the husband and wife each received letters that they showed to one another; it was then that they both first realized that Lady Ongar’s wealth might bring their sister unhappiness. "I can’t believe any of this," said Cecilia, her cheeks flush with a mix of shame and anger. Harry had been such a favorite of hers—she had already grown to love him like a brother! "I never would have thought he was capable of that kind of betrayal," Theodore said slowly. "He’s not a bad person," Cecilia responded. "He might be lazy and foolish, but he’s not a bad person."

"I must at any rate go after him now," said Theodore. "I don't believe this;—I won't believe it. I do not believe it. But if it should be true—!"

"I have to go after him now," said Theodore. "I can't believe this;—I won't believe it. I just don't believe it. But if it turns out to be true—!

"Oh, Theodore."

"Oh, Theo."

"I do not think it is true. It is not the kind of weakness I have seen in him. He is weak and vain, but I should have said that he was true."

"I don't think that's true. It's not the kind of weakness I've noticed in him. He may be weak and vain, but I would say he is genuine."

"I am sure he is true."

"I’m sure he’s the real deal."

"I think so. I cannot say more than that I think so."

"I think so. I can’t say more than that I think so."

"You will write to your mother?"

"You’re going to write to your mom?"

"Yes."

Yes.

"And may I ask Florence to come up? Is it not always better that people should be near to each other when they are engaged?"

"And can I ask Florence to come up? Isn't it always better for people to be close to each other when they're engaged?"

"You can ask her, if you like. I doubt whether she will come."

"You can ask her if you want. I don't think she will come."

"She will come if she thinks that anything is amiss with him."

"She'll come if she thinks something is wrong with him."

Cecilia wrote immediately to Florence, pressing her invitation in the strongest terms that she could use. "I tell you the whole truth," she said. "We have not seen him, and this, of course, has troubled us very greatly. I feel quite sure he would come to us if you were here; and this, I think, should bring you, if no other consideration does so. Theodore imagines that he has become simply idle, and that he is ashamed to show himself here because of that. It may be that he has some trouble with reference to his own home, of which we know nothing. But if he has any such trouble, you ought to be made aware of it, and I feel sure that he would tell you if you were here." Much more she said, arguing in the same way, and pressing Florence to come to London.

Cecilia quickly wrote to Florence, urging her invitation in the strongest way possible. "I’m telling you the whole truth," she said. "We haven’t seen him, and this has really worried us. I’m convinced he would come to see us if you were here; and I think that should be enough to bring you, if nothing else does. Theodore thinks he’s just being lazy and is embarrassed to show himself here because of it. It’s also possible he’s dealing with something at home that we don’t know about. But if that’s the case, you should be informed, and I’m sure he would open up to you if you were here." She continued to express her feelings, arguing in the same way and urging Florence to come to London.

Mr. Burton did not at once send a reply to his mother, but he wrote the following note to Harry:—
 

Mr. Burton didn't respond to his mother right away, but he wrote the following note to Harry:—

Adelphi ——, May, 186—.

Adelphi ——, May, 186—.

My dear Clavering,—I have been sorry to notice your continued absence from the office, and both Cecilia and I have been very sorry that you have discontinued coming to us. But I should not have written to you on this matter, not wishing to interfere in your own concerns, had I not desired to see you specially with reference to my sister. As I have that to say to you concerning her which I can hardly write, will you make an appointment with me here, or at my house? Or, if you cannot do that, will you say when I shall find you at home? If you will come and dine with us we shall like that best, and leave you to name an early day: to-morrow, or the next day, or the day after.

My dear Clavering,—I’ve really missed seeing you around the office, and both Cecilia and I wish you were here. I wouldn’t usually reach out about this because I don’t want to intrude in your matters, but I feel the need to talk to you specifically about my sister. There are things I want to discuss that are too sensitive to put in writing. Could you arrange a meeting with me here or at my place? If that’s not an option, could you let me know when you’ll be home? We would love for you to come over for dinner; feel free to suggest a day that works for you—tomorrow, the day after, or the following day.

Very truly yours,

Very truly yours,

Theodore Burton.
 

Theodore Burton.

When Cecilia's letter reached Stratton, and another post came without any letter from Harry, poor Florence's heart sank low in her bosom. "Well, my dear," said Mrs. Burton, who watched her daughter anxiously while she was reading the letter. Mrs. Burton had not told Florence of her own letter to her son; and now, having herself received no answer, looked to obtain some reply from that which her daughter-in-law had sent.

When Cecilia's letter arrived at Stratton, and another postal delivery came without any letter from Harry, poor Florence felt her heart drop. "So, my dear," said Mrs. Burton, who watched her daughter nervously as she read the letter. Mrs. Burton hadn’t told Florence about her own letter to her son; and now, with no response of her own, she hoped to get some news from the letter that her daughter-in-law had sent.

"Cecilia wants me to go to London," said Florence.

"Cecilia wants me to go to London," Florence said.

"Is there anything the matter that you should go just now?"

"Is there something wrong that you need to leave right now?"

"Not exactly the matter, mamma; but you can see the letter."

"Not quite the issue, mom; but you can check out the letter."

Mrs. Burton read it slowly, and felt sure that much was the matter. She knew that Cecilia would have written in that strain only under the influence of some great alarm. At first she was disposed to think that she herself would go to London. She was eager to know the truth,—eager to utter her loud maternal bleatings if any wrong were threatened to her lamb. Florence might go with her, but she longed herself to be on the field of action. She felt that she could almost annihilate any man by her words and looks who would dare to ill-treat a girl of hers.

Mrs. Burton read it slowly and was certain that something was really wrong. She knew that Cecilia would only write like that if she was under a lot of stress. At first, she thought about going to London herself. She was desperate to find out the truth—ready to voice her loud motherly concerns if anything threatened her child. Florence could join her, but she wanted to be there in the middle of it all. She felt like she could almost take down anyone who dared to mistreat a girl of hers with just her words and glare.

"Well, mamma;—what do you think?"

"Well, Mom;—what do you think?"

"I don't know yet, my dear. I will speak to your papa before dinner." But as Mrs. Burton had been usually autocratic in the management of her own daughters, Florence was aware that her mother simply required a little time before she made up her mind. "It is not that I want to go to London—for the pleasure of it, mamma."

"I don't know yet, my dear. I'll talk to your dad before dinner." But since Mrs. Burton usually took full control in managing her own daughters, Florence knew that her mother just needed a bit more time before she decided. "It's not that I want to go to London just for the fun of it, Mom."

"I know that, my dear."

"I know, my dear."

"Nor yet merely to see him!—though of course I do long to see him!"

"Not just to see him!—though I really do want to see him!"

"Of course you do;—why shouldn't you?"

"Of course you do;—why wouldn't you?"

"But Cecilia is so very prudent, and she thinks that it will be better. And she would not have pressed it, unless Theodore had thought so too!"

"But Cecilia is really careful, and she believes it will be better. And she wouldn't have pushed for it if Theodore didn't think so too!"

"I thought Theodore would have written to me!"

"I thought Theodore would have called me!"

"But he writes so seldom."

"But he hardly writes."

"I expected a letter from him now, as I had written to him."

"I was expecting a letter from him since I had written to him."

"About Harry, do you mean?"

"Are you talking about Harry?"

"Well;—yes. I did not mention it, as I was aware I might make you uneasy. But I saw that you were unhappy at not hearing from him."

"Well;—yes. I didn’t bring it up because I knew it might make you anxious. But I noticed you seemed upset about not hearing from him."

"Oh, mamma, do let me go."

"Oh, Mom, please let me go."

"Of course you shall go if you wish it;—but let me speak to papa before anything is quite decided."

"Of course you can go if you want to;—but let me talk to Dad before anything is totally settled."

Mrs. Burton did speak to her husband, and it was arranged that Florence should go up to Onslow Crescent. But Mrs. Burton, though she had been always autocratic about her unmarried daughters, had never been autocratic about herself. When she hinted that she also might go, she saw that the scheme was not approved, and she at once abandoned it. "It would look as if we were all afraid," said Mr. Burton, "and after all what does it come to?—a young gentleman does not write to his sweetheart for two or three weeks. I used to think myself the best lover in the world if I wrote once a month."

Mrs. Burton talked to her husband, and they decided that Florence should go to Onslow Crescent. However, even though Mrs. Burton had always been controlling about her unmarried daughters, she had never been controlling about herself. When she suggested that she might go too, she realized that the idea wasn't welcomed, and she quickly dropped it. "It would seem like we're all scared," said Mr. Burton, "and really, what’s the big deal? A young guy doesn’t write to his girlfriend for two or three weeks. I used to think I was the best boyfriend ever if I wrote once a month."

"There was no penny post then, Mr. Burton."

"There wasn't a penny post back then, Mr. Burton."

"And I often wish there was none now," said Mr. Burton. That matter was therefore decided, and Florence wrote back to her sister-in-law, saying that she would go up to London on the third day from that. In the meantime, Harry Clavering and Theodore Burton had met.

"And I often wish there wasn't one now," said Mr. Burton. That issue was settled, and Florence wrote back to her sister-in-law, telling her that she would head to London in three days. In the meantime, Harry Clavering and Theodore Burton had crossed paths.

Has it ever been the lot of any unmarried male reader of these pages to pass three or four days in London, without anything to do,—to have to get through them by himself,—and to have that burden on his shoulder, with the additional burden of some terrible, wearing misery, away from which there seems to be no road, and out of which there is apparently no escape? That was Harry Clavering's condition for some few days after the evening which he last passed in the company of Lady Ongar,—and I will ask any such unmarried man whether, in such a plight, there was for him any other alternative but to wish himself dead? In such a condition, a man can simply walk the streets by himself, and declare to himself that everything is bad, and rotten, and vile, and worthless. He wishes himself dead, and calculates the different advantages of prussic acid and pistols. He may the while take his meals very punctually at his club, may smoke his cigars, and drink his bitter beer, or brandy-and-water;—but he is all the time wishing himself dead, and making that calculation as to the best way of achieving that desirable result. Such was Harry Clavering's condition now. As for his office, the doors of that place were absolutely closed against him, by the presence of Theodore Burton. When he attempted to read he could not understand a word, or sit for ten minutes with a book in his hand. No occupation was possible to him. He longed to go again to Bolton Street, but he did not even do that. If there, he could act only as though Florence had been deserted for ever;—and if he so acted he would be infamous for life. And yet he had sworn to Julia that such was his intention. He hardly dared to ask himself which of the two he loved. The misery of it all had become so heavy upon him, that he could take no pleasure in the thought of his love. It must always be all regret, all sorrow, and all remorse. Then there came upon him the letter from Theodore Burton, and he knew that it was necessary that he should see the writer.

Has any single guy reading this ever spent three or four days in London with nothing to do, all alone, carrying the weight of some terrible misery that seemed impossible to escape? That was Harry Clavering's situation for a few days after the last evening he spent with Lady Ongar. I ask any single man in that position if he could think of anything else but wishing he were dead. In such a state, a guy can just walk the streets, convincing himself that everything is bad, rotten, vile, and worthless. He thinks about ending it all, weighing the pros and cons of prussic acid versus a gun. Meanwhile, he might still eat his meals at the club, smoke his cigars, and drink his bitter beer or brandy and water; yet he’s constantly hoping for death and plotting how to achieve it. That was Harry Clavering's mindset now. As for his office, he was completely shut out by Theodore Burton's presence. When he tried to read, he couldn’t grasp a single word, nor could he sit still with a book for ten minutes. He found it impossible to focus on anything. He longed to go back to Bolton Street, yet he didn’t even do that. If he did, he could only act as if Florence were gone forever; and if he went that route, he’d be infamous for life. Still, he had promised Julia that he would do so. He hardly dared to question which of the two he truly loved. The weight of it all was so overwhelming that he couldn’t find joy in his love anymore. It was all just regret, sorrow, and remorse. Then he received a letter from Theodore Burton, and he knew he had to meet the writer.

Nothing could be more disagreeable than such an interview, but he could not allow himself to be guilty of the cowardice of declining it. Of a personal quarrel with Burton he was not afraid. He felt, indeed, that he might almost find relief in the capability of being himself angry with any one. But he must positively make up his mind before such an interview. He must devote himself either to Florence or to Julia;—and he did not know how to abandon the one or the other. He had allowed himself to be so governed by impulse that he had pledged himself to Lady Ongar, and had sworn to her that he would be entirely hers. She, it is true, had not taken him altogether at his word, but not the less did he know,—did he think that he knew,—that she looked for the performance of his promise. And she had been the first that he had sworn to love!

Nothing could be more unpleasant than this meeting, but he couldn't let himself be cowardly enough to avoid it. He wasn't afraid of a personal confrontation with Burton. In fact, he felt that he might actually find some relief in being able to express anger towards someone. But he needed to make a decision before this meeting. He had to commit either to Florence or to Julia;—and he didn't know how to let go of either one. He had let himself be so led by impulse that he had promised Lady Ongar he would be completely hers. True, she hadn't fully taken him at his word, but he still knew—or thought he knew—that she expected him to keep his promise. And she was the first person he had sworn to love!

In his dilemma he did at last go to Bolton Street, and there found that Lady Ongar had left town for three or four days. The servant said that she had gone, he believed, to the Isle of Wight; and that Madame Gordeloup had gone with her. She was to be back in town early in the following week. This was on a Thursday, and he was aware that he could not postpone his interview with Burton till after Julia's return. So he went to his club, and nailing himself as it were to the writing-table, made an appointment for the following morning. He would be with Burton at the Adelphi at twelve o'clock. He had been in trouble, he said, and that trouble had kept him from the office and from Onslow Crescent. Having written this, he sent it off, and then played billiards and smoked and dined, played more billiards and smoked and drank till the usual hours of the night had come. He was not a man who liked such things. He had not become what he was by passing his earlier years after this fashion. But his misery required excitement,—and billiards with tobacco were better than the desolation of solitude.

In his dilemma, he finally went to Bolton Street and found out that Lady Ongar had left town for three or four days. The servant mentioned that she had gone to the Isle of Wight, as he believed, and that Madame Gordeloup had gone with her. She was expected to be back in town early the following week. This was on a Thursday, and he knew he couldn't postpone his meeting with Burton until after Julia returned. So he went to his club, where he metaphorically nailed himself to the writing table and made an appointment for the next morning. He would meet Burton at the Adelphi at twelve o'clock. He explained that he had been in trouble, which had kept him away from the office and Onslow Crescent. After writing this, he sent it off, then played billiards, smoked, had dinner, played more billiards, and drank until the usual hours of the night arrived. He was not someone who enjoyed such activities. He hadn't become who he was by spending his earlier years this way. But his misery needed some distraction, and billiards with tobacco were better than the emptiness of solitude.

On the following morning he did not breakfast till near eleven. Why should he get up as long as it was possible to obtain the relief which was to be had from dozing? As far as possible he would not think of the matter till he had put his hat upon his head to go to the Adelphi. But the time for taking his hat soon came; and he started on his short journey. But even as he walked, he could not think of it. He was purposeless, as a ship without a rudder, telling himself that he could only go as the winds might direct him. How he did hate himself for his one weakness! And yet he hardly made an effort to overcome it. On one point only did he seem to have a resolve. If Burton attempted to use with him anything like a threat he would instantly resent it.

The next morning, he didn't eat breakfast until almost eleven. Why get up when he could just keep dozing? He decided to avoid thinking about it until he had his hat on and was ready to head to the Adelphi. But that moment came around quickly, and he set off on his short trip. Even while walking, he couldn't focus on it. He felt aimless, like a ship without a rudder, telling himself he could only go wherever the winds wanted. He really hated himself for this one weakness! Yet, he barely tried to fight it. There was only one thing he seemed determined about: if Burton tried to threaten him in any way, he'd respond immediately.

Punctually at twelve he walked into the outer office, and was told that Mr. Burton was in his room.

Punctually at twelve, he walked into the outer office and was informed that Mr. Burton was in his room.

"Halloa, Clavering," said Walliker, who was standing with his back to the fire, "I thought we had lost you for good and all. And here you are come back again!"

"Hey, Clavering," said Walliker, who was standing with his back to the fire, "I thought we had lost you for good. And here you are, back again!"

Harry had always disliked this man, and now hated him worse than ever. "Yes; I am here," said he, "for a few minutes; but I believe I need not trouble you."

Harry had always disliked this guy, and now he hated him more than ever. "Yeah, I'm here," he said, "for a few minutes, but I don't think I need to bother you."

"All right, old fellow," said Walliker; and then Harry passed through into the inner room.

"Okay, buddy," said Walliker; and then Harry walked into the inner room.

"I am very glad to see you, Harry," said Burton, rising and giving his hand cordially to Clavering. "And I am sorry to hear that you have been in trouble. Is it anything in which we can help you?"

"I’m really happy to see you, Harry," said Burton, standing up and shaking Clavering’s hand warmly. "And I’m sorry to hear you’ve been in trouble. Is there anything we can do to help?"

"I hope,—Mrs. Burton is well," said Harry, hesitating.

"I hope Mrs. Burton is doing well," said Harry, pausing.

"Pretty well."

"Pretty good."

"And the children?"

"And the kids?"

"Quite well. They say you are a very bad fellow not to go and see them."

"Pretty good. People say you're a really bad person for not going to see them."

"I believe I am a bad fellow," said Harry.

"I think I'm a bad guy," said Harry.

"Sit down, Harry. It will be best to come at the point at once;—will it not? Is there anything wrong between you and Florence?"

"Sit down, Harry. It’s best to get straight to the point, right? Is there something going on between you and Florence?"

"What do you mean by wrong?"

"What do you mean by wrong?"

"I should call it very wrong,—hideously wrong, if after all that has passed between you, there should now be any doubt as to your affection for each other. If such doubt were now to arise with her, I should almost disown my sister."

"I would call it very wrong—horribly wrong—if after everything that has happened between you, there were still any doubt about your feelings for each other. If such doubt were to come up with her now, I would almost disown my sister."

"You will never have to blush for her."

"You'll never have to be embarrassed for her."

"I think not. I thank God that hitherto there have been no such blushes among us. And I hope, Harry, that my heart may never have to bleed for her. Come, Harry, let me tell you all at once like an honest man. I hate subterfuges and secrets. A report has reached the old people at home,—not Florence, mind,—that you are untrue to Florence, and are passing your time with that lady who is the sister of your cousin's wife."

"I think not. I thank God that so far there have been no such blushes among us. And I hope, Harry, that my heart never has to bleed for her. Come on, Harry, let me tell you everything at once like an honest man. I hate tricks and secrets. A report has reached the old folks at home—not Florence, mind you—that you're being unfaithful to Florence and are spending time with that lady who is your cousin's wife's sister."

"What right have they to ask how I pass my time?"

"What right do they have to ask how I spend my time?"

"Do not be unjust, Harry. If you simply tell me that your visits to that lady imply no evil to my sister, I, knowing you to be a gentleman, will take your word for all that it can mean." He paused, and Harry hesitated and could not answer. "Nay, dear friend,—brother, as we both of us have thought you,—come once more to Onslow Crescent and kiss the bairns, and kiss Cecilia, too, and sit with us at our table, and talk as you used to do, and I will ask no further question;—nor will she. Then you will come back here to your work, and your trouble will be gone, and your mind will be at ease; and, Harry, one of the best girls that ever gave her heart into a man's keeping will be there to worship you, and to swear when your back is turned that any one who says a word against you shall be no brother and no sister and no friend of hers."

"Don’t be unfair, Harry. If you just tell me that your visits to that woman don't mean any harm to my sister, I, knowing you to be a gentleman, will take your word at face value." He paused, and Harry hesitated, unable to respond. "Come on, dear friend—brother, as we both have thought of you—come once more to Onslow Crescent, kiss the kids, kiss Cecilia too, sit with us at our table, and chat like you used to. I won't ask any more questions, and neither will she. Then you can come back here to your work, your worries will be gone, and your mind will be at ease. And, Harry, one of the best girls who ever gave her heart to a man will be there to adore you, and swear, when your back is turned, that anyone who speaks ill of you won’t be a brother, sister, or friend of hers."

And this was the man who had dusted his boots with his pocket-handkerchief, and whom Harry had regarded as being on that account hardly fit to be his friend! He knew that the man was noble, and good, and generous, and true;—and knew also that in all that Burton said he simply did his duty as a brother. But not on that account was it the easier for him to reply.

And this was the guy who had wiped his boots with his pocket handkerchief, and whom Harry thought was hardly worthy of being his friend for that reason! He knew the man was noble, good, generous, and honest;—and he also knew that in everything Burton said, he was just doing his duty as a brother. But that didn’t make it any easier for him to respond.

"Say that you will come to us this evening," said Burton. "Even if you have an engagement, put it off."

"Say you'll come to us this evening," said Burton. "Even if you have plans, reschedule them."

"I have none," said Harry.

"I have none," Harry said.

"Then say that you will come to us, and all will be well."

"Then say that you'll join us, and everything will be alright."

Harry understood of course that his compliance with this invitation would be taken as implying that all was right. It would be so easy to accept the invitation, and any other answer was so difficult! But yet he would not bring himself to tell the lie.

Harry realized that accepting this invitation would suggest that everything was fine. It would be so easy to say yes, and anything else would be so hard! But still, he couldn't bring himself to lie.

"Burton," he said, "I am in trouble."

"Burton," he said, "I'm in trouble."

"What is the trouble?" The man's voice was now changed, and so was the glance of his eye. There was no expression of anger,—none as yet; but the sweetness of his countenance was gone,—a sweetness that was unusual to him, but which still was at his command when he needed it.

"What’s the problem?" The man's voice had changed, and so had the look in his eye. There was no sign of anger—at least not yet; but the warmth of his face was gone—a warmth that was rare for him, but which he could still summon when he needed to.

"I cannot tell you all here. If you will let me come to you this evening I will tell you everything,—to you and to Cecilia too. Will you let me come?"

"I can’t share everything here. If you’ll allow me to come by this evening, I’ll tell you everything—both to you and to Cecilia as well. Will you let me come?"

"Certainly. Will you dine with us?"

"Sure. Will you join us for dinner?"

"No;—after dinner; when the children are in bed." Then he went, leaving on the mind of Theodore Burton an impression that though something was much amiss, his mother had been wrong in her fears respecting Lady Ongar.

"No;—after dinner; when the kids are in bed." Then he left, leaving Theodore Burton with the feeling that even though something was seriously off, his mom was mistaken in her worries about Lady Ongar.

 

 

CHAPTER XXVII.

FRESHWATER GATE.

Count Pateroff, Sophie's brother, was a man who, when he had taken a thing in hand, generally liked to carry it through. It may perhaps be said that most men are of this turn of mind; but the count was, I think, especially eager in this respect. And as he was not one who had many irons in the fire, who made either many little efforts, or any great efforts after things altogether beyond his reach, he was justified in expecting success. As to Archie's courtship, any one who really knew the man and the woman, and who knew anything of the nature of women in general, would have predicted failure for him. Even with Doodle's aid he could not have a chance in the race. But when Count Pateroff entered himself for the same prize, those who knew him would not speak of his failure as a thing certain.

Count Pateroff, Sophie's brother, was a guy who, once he set his mind on something, usually followed through. While it's fair to say that most guys are like that, the count was particularly passionate about it. He wasn't someone who spread himself thin with a lot of small tasks or took on huge challenges that were out of reach, so he had good reason to expect success. Regarding Archie's pursuit of Sophie, anyone who really understood both him and her, along with a bit about women in general, would have predicted that he would fail. Even with Doodle's help, he wouldn’t stand a chance in the competition. However, when Count Pateroff decided to compete for the same prize, those who knew him wouldn’t view his failure as a sure thing.

The prize was too great not to be attempted by so very prudent a gentleman. He was less impulsive in his nature than his sister, and did not open his eyes and talk with watering mouth of the seven thousands of pounds a year; but in his quiet way he had weighed and calculated all the advantages to be gained, had even ascertained at what rate he could insure the lady's life, and had made himself certain that nothing in the deed of Lord Ongar's marriage-settlement entailed any pecuniary penalty on his widow's second marriage. Then he had gone down, as we know, to Ongar Park, and as he had walked from the lodge to the house and back again, he had looked around him complacently, and told himself that the place would do very well. For the English character, in spite of the pigheadedness of many Englishmen, he had,—as he would have said himself,—much admiration, and he thought that the life of a country gentleman, with a nice place of his own,—with such a very nice place of his own as was Ongar Park,—and so very nice an income, would suit him well in his declining years.

The prize was too significant not to be pursued by such a careful gentleman. He was less impulsive than his sister and didn’t eagerly talk about the seven thousand pounds a year, but in his calm way, he had weighed and considered all the benefits to be gained. He had even figured out the rate at which he could insure the lady's life and was sure that nothing in Lord Ongar's marriage settlement would impose any financial penalty on his widow's second marriage. Then, as we know, he went down to Ongar Park, and while walking from the lodge to the house and back, he looked around with satisfaction and told himself that the place would be just fine. He had a lot of admiration for the English character, despite the stubbornness of many Englishmen, and he thought that the life of a country gentleman, especially with such a lovely estate as Ongar Park and a very nice income, would suit him well in his later years.

And he had certain advantages, certain aids towards his object, which had come to him from circumstances;—as, indeed, he had also certain disadvantages. He knew the lady, which was in itself much. He knew much of the lady's history, and had that cognisance of the saddest circumstances of her life, which in itself creates an intimacy. It is not necessary now to go back to those scenes which had disfigured the last months of Lord Ongar's life, but the reader will understand that what had then occurred gave the count a possible footing as a suitor. And the reader will also understand the disadvantages which had at this time already shown themselves in the lady's refusal to see the count.

He had certain advantages and support towards his goal that had come to him from his circumstances; but he also had some disadvantages. Knowing the lady was significant on its own. He was familiar with much of her past and had insight into the saddest events of her life, which created a sense of closeness. There's no need to revisit the events that had marred the last months of Lord Ongar's life, but it's clear that what happened then gave the count a possible chance as a suitor. The reader will also recognize the disadvantages that had already become apparent in the lady's refusal to see the count.

It may be thought that Sophie's standing with Lady Ongar would be a great advantage to her brother; but I doubt whether the brother trusted either the honesty or the discretion of his sister. He would have been willing to purchase such assistance as she might give,—not in Archie's pleasant way, with bank-notes hidden under his glove,—but by acknowledgments for services to be turned into solid remuneration when the marriage should have taken place, had he not feared that Sophie might communicate the fact of such acknowledgments to the other lady,—making her own bargain in doing so. He had calculated all this, and had come to the conclusion that he had better make no direct proposal to Sophie; and when Sophie made a direct proposal to him, pointing out to him in glowing language all the fine things which such a marriage would give him, he had hardly vouchsafed to her a word of answer. "Very well," said Sophie to herself;—"very well. Then we both know what we are about."

It might seem that Sophie's connection with Lady Ongar would be a huge advantage for her brother, but I doubt he trusted either her honesty or judgment. He would have been open to accepting any help she could provide—not in Archie's charming way, with cash tucked under his glove—but through acknowledgments for services that could be converted into real payment once the marriage happened, if he hadn't worried that Sophie might share those acknowledgments with the other lady—potentially striking her own deal in the process. He had thought this through and decided it was best not to make a direct proposal to Sophie. When Sophie did approach him directly, passionately outlining all the great things that such a marriage could offer him, he hardly gave her a response. “Fine,” Sophie told herself; “fine. So we both know what we’re doing.”

Sophie herself would have kept Lady Ongar from marrying any one had she been able. Not even a brother's gratitude would be so serviceable to her as the generous kindness of a devoted friend. That she might be able both to sell her services to a lover, and also to keep Julie from marrying, was a lucky combination of circumstances which did not occur to her till Archie came to her with the money in his glove. That complicated game she was now playing, and was aware that Harry Clavering was the great stumbling-block in her way. A woman even less clever than Sophie would have perceived that Lady Ongar was violently attached to Harry; and Sophie, when she did see it, thought that there was nothing left for her but to make her hay while the sun was yet shining. Then she heard the story of Florence Burton; and again she thought that Fortune was on her side. She told the story of Florence Burton,—with what result we know; and was quite sharp enough to perceive afterwards that the tale had had its intended effect,—even though her Julie had resolutely declined to speak either of Harry Clavering or of Florence Burton.

Sophie would have prevented Lady Ongar from marrying anyone if she could. Not even a brother's gratitude would mean as much to her as the genuine kindness of a loyal friend. The chance for her to offer her services to a lover while also keeping Julie from marrying was a fortunate twist of fate that didn’t occur to her until Archie came to her with the money in his glove. She was aware that the complicated game she was playing had Harry Clavering as the major obstacle in her path. Even a woman less astute than Sophie would have noticed that Lady Ongar was deeply in love with Harry; and once Sophie realized this, she thought she needed to take action while she still had the chance. Then she heard the story about Florence Burton, and once again believed that luck was on her side. She shared the story of Florence Burton—with the outcome we know—and was sharp enough to notice afterwards that the story had the desired effect, even though her Julie had firmly refused to discuss either Harry Clavering or Florence Burton.

Count Pateroff had again called in Bolton Street, and had again been refused admittance. It was plain to him to see by the servant's manner that it was intended that he should understand that he was not to be admitted. Under such circumstances, it was necessary that he must either abandon his pursuit, or that he must operate upon Lady Ongar through some other feeling than her personal regard for himself. He might, perhaps, have trusted much to his own eloquence if he could have seen her; but how is a man to be eloquent in his wooing if he cannot see the lady whom he covets? There is, indeed, the penny post, but in these days of legal restraints, there is no other method of approaching an unwilling beauty. Forcible abduction is put an end to as regards Great Britain and Ireland. So the count had resort to the post.

Count Pateroff had once again visited Bolton Street, and once again he had been denied entry. It was clear to him from the servant's attitude that he was meant to understand he wasn’t welcome. Given the situation, he had to either give up on his pursuit or try to win over Lady Ongar using feelings other than her personal affection for him. He might have relied on his own charm if he could have met her in person, but how can a man be persuasive in his courtship if he can’t see the woman he desires? There’s always the regular mail, but these days, with all the legal restrictions, there’s no other way to approach a reluctant beauty. Forcing her away is no longer an option in Great Britain and Ireland. So, the Count turned to the mail.

His letter was very long, and shall not, therefore, be given to the reader. He began by telling Lady Ongar that she owed it to him for the good services he had done her, to read what he might say, and to answer him. He then gave her various reasons why she should see him, pleading, among other things, in language which she could understand, though the words were purposely as ambiguous as they could be made, that he had possessed and did possess the power of doing her a grievous injury, and that he had abstained, and—hoped that he might be able to abstain for the future. She knew that the words contained no threat,—that taken literally they were the reverse of a threat, and amounted to a promise,—but she understood also all that he had intended to imply. Long as his own letter was, he said nothing in it as to his suit, confining himself to a request that she should see him. But with his letter he sent her an enclosure longer than the letter itself, in which his wishes were clearly explained.

His letter was really long, so I won’t share it all with you. He started by telling Lady Ongar that she owed it to him, because of the good things he had done for her, to read what he had to say and respond. He then gave her several reasons to meet with him, arguing, among other things, in a way that she could grasp, even though he made the words intentionally vague, that he had the ability to seriously harm her and that he had held back, hoping to continue doing so in the future. She understood that the words were not a threat—indeed, if taken literally, they were the opposite of a threat and amounted to a promise—but she also got all that he intended to imply. Despite the length of his letter, he didn’t mention anything about his intentions, only asking that she see him. However, he included with his letter an attachment even longer than the letter itself, where his wishes were clearly laid out.

This enclosure purported to be an expression of Lord Ongar's wishes on many subjects, as they had been communicated to Count Pateroff in the latter days of the lord's life; but as the manuscript was altogether in the count's writing, and did not even pretend to have been subjected to Lord Ongar's eye, it simply amounted to the count's own story of their alleged conversations. There might have been no such conversations, or their tenour might have been very different from that which the count represented, or the statements and opinions, if expressed at all by Lord Ongar, might have been expressed at times when no statements or opinions coming from him could be of any value. But as to these conversations, if they could have been verified as having come from Lord Ongar's mouth when he was in full possession of such faculties as he possessed,—all that would have amounted to nothing with Lady Ongar. To Lord Ongar alive she had owed obedience, and had been obedient. To Lord Ongar dead she owed no obedience, and would not be obedient.

This document supposedly reflects Lord Ongar's thoughts on various topics, as he communicated them to Count Pateroff in the final days of his life. However, since the manuscript was entirely written by the count and didn't even claim to have been seen by Lord Ongar, it was essentially just the count's version of their supposed conversations. Those conversations might not have even taken place, or their content could have been very different from what the count claimed. Furthermore, any statements or opinions attributed to Lord Ongar might have been made at times when anything he said wouldn’t hold any significance. But as for these conversations, even if they could be confirmed as coming from Lord Ongar when he was fully aware of his faculties, that wouldn’t matter to Lady Ongar. When Lord Ongar was alive, she owed him her obedience, and she followed that obligation. Now that he was dead, she felt no obligation to obey him and would not do so.

Such would have been her feelings as to any document which could have reached her, purporting to contain Lord Ongar's wishes; but this document was of a nature which made her specially antagonistic to the exercise of any such marital authority from the grave. It was very long, and went into small details,—details which were very small; but the upshot of it all was a tendering of great thanks to Count Pateroff, and the expression of a strong wish that the count should marry his widow. "O. said that this would be the only thing for J.'s name." "O. said that this would be the safest course for his own honour." "O. said, as he took my hand, that in promising to take this step I gave him great comfort." "O. commissioned me to speak to J. in his name to this effect." The O. was of course Lord Ongar, and the J. was of course Julia. It was all in French, and went on in the same strain for many pages. Lady Ongar answered the letter as follows:—
 

Such would have been her feelings about any document that could have reached her, claiming to contain Lord Ongar's wishes; but this document was of a kind that made her particularly opposed to any such marital authority from beyond the grave. It was very lengthy and went into minute details—details that were really trivial; but the gist of it was a heartfelt thanks to Count Pateroff and a strong desire for the count to marry his widow. "O. said that this would be the only thing for J.'s name." "O. said that this would be the safest course for his own honour." "O. said, as he took my hand, that by promising to take this step I gave him great comfort." "O. asked me to speak to J. in his name about this." The O. referred to Lord Ongar, and the J. was clearly Julia. It was all written in French, and continued in the same tone for many pages. Lady Ongar responded to the letter as follows:

Lady Ongar presents her compliments to Count Pateroff, and begs to return the enclosed manuscript, which is, to her, perfectly valueless. Lady Ongar must still decline, and now more strongly than before, to receive Count Pateroff.

Lady Ongar sends her regards to Count Pateroff and requests the return of the enclosed manuscript, which she considers entirely worthless. Lady Ongar must still firmly decline to meet Count Pateroff, even more resolutely than before.

Bolton Street, May 186—.
 

Bolton Street, May 186—.

She was quite firm as she did this. She had no doubt at all on the matter. She did not feel that she wanted to ask for any advice. But she did feel that this count might still work her additional woe, that her cup of sorrow might not even yet be full, and that she was sadly,—sadly in want of love and protection. For aught she knew, the count might publish the whole statement, and people might believe that those words came from her husband, and that her husband had understood what would be best for her fame and for his honour. The whole thing was a threat, and not to save herself from any misery, would she have succumbed to a menace; but still it was possible that the threat might be carried out.

She was very resolute as she did this. She had no doubts about it. She didn't feel the need to ask for any advice. But she did think that the count could still bring her more trouble, that her grief might not be finished, and that she was desperately in need of love and protection. For all she knew, the count could publish everything, and people might believe those words were from her husband, and that her husband understood what would be best for her reputation and his honor. The whole situation felt like a threat, and she wouldn't give in to any intimidation, but it was still possible that the threat could be carried out.

She was sorely in want of love and protection. At this time, when the count's letter reached her, Harry had been with her; and we know what had passed between them. She had bid him go to Florence,—and love Florence,—and marry Florence,—and leave her in her desolation. That had been her last command to him. But we all know what such commands mean. She had not been false in giving him these orders. She had intended it at the moment. The glow of self-sacrifice had been warm in her bosom,—and she had resolved to do without that which she wanted in order that another might have it. But when she thought of it afterwards in her loneliness, she told herself that Florence Burton could not want Harry's love as she wanted it. There could not be such need to this girl, who possessed father and mother, and brothers, and youth, as there was to her, who had no other arm on which she could lean, besides that of the one man for whom she had acknowledged her love, and who had also declared his passion for her. She made no scheme to deprive Florence of her lover. In the long hours of her own solitude she never revoked, even within her own bosom, the last words she had said to Harry Clavering. But not the less did she hope that he might come to her again, and that she might learn from him that he had freed himself from that unfortunate engagement into which her falseness to him had driven him.

She was desperately in need of love and protection. At the time the count's letter reached her, Harry had been with her; and we know what had happened between them. She had told him to go to Florence,—and love Florence,—and marry Florence,—and leave her in her despair. That had been her last order to him. But we all know what such orders mean. She hadn't been dishonest in giving him these instructions. She had meant it at the moment. The feeling of self-sacrifice had burned warmly in her heart,—and she had resolved to go without what she wanted so that another might have it. But when she thought about it later in her loneliness, she told herself that Florence Burton couldn't possibly want Harry's love as much as she did. That girl, who had parents, brothers, and youth, couldn't have the same need as she did, who had no other shoulder to lean on except for the one man she loved and who had also declared his feelings for her. She didn't plan to take Florence's lover away. During the long hours of her solitude, she never went back on the last words she had said to Harry Clavering, even in her mind. But she still hoped that he might come back to her, and that she might find out from him that he had freed himself from that unfortunate engagement that her betrayal had pushed him into.

It was after she had answered Count Pateroff's letter that she resolved to go out of town for three or four days. For some short time she had been minded to go away altogether, and not to return till after the autumn; but this scheme gradually diminished itself and fell away, till she determined that she would come back after three or four days. Then came to her Sophie,—her devoted Sophie,—Sophie whom she despised and hated; Sophie of whom she was so anxious to rid herself that in all her plans there was some little under-plot to that effect; Sophie whom she knew to be dishonest to her in any way that might make dishonesty profitable; and before Sophie had left her, Sophie had engaged herself to go with her dear friend to the Isle of Wight! As a matter of course, Sophie was to be franked on this expedition. On such expeditions Sophies are always franked as a matter of course. And Sophie would travel with all imaginable luxury,—a matter to which Sophie was by no means indifferent, though her own private life was conducted with an economy that was not luxurious. But, although all these good things came in Sophie's way, she contrived to make it appear that she was devoting herself in a manner that was almost sacrificial to the friend of her bosom. At the same time Lady Ongar sent a few words, as a message, to the count by his sister. Lady Ongar, having told to Madame Gordeloup the story of the document which had reached her, and having described her own answer, was much commended by her friend.

It was after she replied to Count Pateroff's letter that she decided to leave town for three or four days. For a little while, she had been thinking about getting away completely and not coming back until after autumn; but that idea gradually faded until she concluded she would return after three or four days. Then came Sophie—her devoted Sophie—whom she despised and hated. Sophie, whom she was so eager to be rid of that in all her plans, there was a little subplot aimed at that goal; Sophie, whom she knew would be dishonest with her in ways that could benefit her; and before Sophie left her, Sophie had committed herself to going with her dear friend to the Isle of Wight! Naturally, Sophie was expected to be taken care of on this trip. On such trips, it's always expected that Sophies are taken care of. And Sophie would travel in utmost luxury—a detail to which Sophie certainly paid attention, even though she lived her own life with an economy that wasn't luxurious at all. Yet, despite all these perks coming Sophie's way, she managed to make it seem like she was selflessly dedicated to her closest friend. Meanwhile, Lady Ongar passed a few words along to the count through his sister. Lady Ongar, after sharing with Madame Gordeloup the story of the document that had reached her and explaining her own response, was highly praised by her friend.

"You are quite right, dear, quite. Of course I am fond of my brother. Edouard and I have always been the best of friends. But that does not make me think you ought to give yourself to him. Bah! Why should a woman give away everything? Edouard is a fine fellow. But what is that? Fine fellows like to have all the money themselves."

"You’re absolutely right, dear, definitely. Of course, I care about my brother. Edouard and I have always been really close. But that doesn’t mean I think you should give yourself to him. Ugh! Why should a woman give everything away? Edouard is a great guy. But what does that matter? Great guys want to keep all the money for themselves."

"Will you tell him,—from me," said Lady Ongar, "that I will take it as a kindness on his part if he will abstain from coming to my house. I certainly shall not see him with my own consent."

"Please tell him—from me," said Lady Ongar, "that I would appreciate it if he would refrain from coming to my house. I definitely won't see him if it's up to me."

Sophie promised,—and probably gave the message; but when she also informed Edouard of Lady Ongar's intended visit to the Isle of Wight, telling him the day on which they were going and the precise spot, with the name of the hotel at which they were to stay, she went a little beyond the commission which her dearest friend had given her.

Sophie promised—and likely delivered the message; but when she also told Edouard about Lady Ongar's planned visit to the Isle of Wight, sharing the date they were going, the exact location, and the name of the hotel where they would be staying, she went a bit beyond what her closest friend had asked her to do.

At the western end of the Isle of Wight, and on the further shore, about three miles from the point of the island which we call the Needles, there is a little break in the cliff, known to all stay-at-home English travellers as Freshwater Gate. Here there is a cluster of cottages and two inns, and a few bathing-boxes, and ready access by easy ascents to the breezy downs on either side, over which the sea air blows with all its salt and wholesome sweetness. At one of these two inns Lady Ongar located herself and Sophie; and all Freshwater, and all Yarmouth, and all that end of the island were alive to the fact that the rich widowed countess respecting whom such strange tales were told, had come on a visit to these parts. Innkeepers like such visitors. The more venomous are the stories told against them, the more money are they apt to spend, and the less likely are they to examine their bills. A rich woman altogether without a character is a mine of wealth to an innkeeper. In the present case no such godsend had come in the way,—but there was supposed to be a something a little odd, and the visitor was on that account the more welcome.

At the western end of the Isle of Wight, on the opposite shore, about three miles from the point of the island known as the Needles, there's a small gap in the cliff, recognized by all homebound English travelers as Freshwater Gate. Here, you'll find a cluster of cottages, two inns, a few bathing boxes, and easy access to the breezy hills on either side, where the sea air flows in with its salty, fresh sweetness. One of these inns was where Lady Ongar and Sophie stayed, and everyone in Freshwater, Yarmouth, and that part of the island was buzzing with the news that the wealthy widowed countess, about whom so many strange stories circulated, had come to visit. Innkeepers love having such guests. The more scandalous the stories about them, the more they tend to spend, and the less likely they are to scrutinize their bills. A wealthy woman with a questionable reputation is a gold mine for an innkeeper. In this case, there wasn't exactly a windfall, but there was believed to be something a bit unusual about her, making the visitor even more welcome.

Sophie was not the most delightful companion in the world for such a place. London was her sphere, as she herself had understood when declaiming against those husbands who keep their wives in the country. And she had no love for the sea specially, regarding all winds as nuisances excepting such as had been raised by her own efforts, and thinking that salt from a saltcellar was more convenient than that brought to her on the breezes. It was now near the end of May, but she had not been half an hour at the inn before she was loud in demanding a fire,—and when the fire came she was unwilling to leave it. Her gesture was magnificent when Lady Ongar proposed to her that she should bathe. What,—put her own dear little dry body, by her own will, into the cold sea! She shrugged herself, and shook herself, and without speaking a word declined with so much eloquence that it was impossible not to admire her. Nor would she walk. On the first day, during the warmest part of the day, she allowed herself to be taken out in a carriage belonging to the inn; but after her drive she clung to the fire, and consumed her time with a French novel.

Sophie wasn’t exactly the most enjoyable company for such a place. London was her scene, as she herself had realized when criticizing those husbands who kept their wives in the country. She had no particular fondness for the sea, seeing all winds as annoyances except for those she had created herself, and thought that salt from a saltshaker was far more convenient than that carried in by the breezes. It was now almost the end of May, but she had only been at the inn for half an hour before she was loudly demanding a fire—and once the fire was lit, she was reluctant to leave it. Her reaction was dramatic when Lady Ongar suggested that she take a swim. What—put her own dear, dry body into the cold sea by her own choice? She shrugged and shook her head, and without saying a word, she declined in such a way that it was impossible not to admire her. She wasn’t interested in going for a walk either. On the first day, during the warmest part of the day, she allowed herself to be taken out in a carriage from the inn; but after her ride, she huddled by the fire and spent her time reading a French novel.

Nor was Lady Ongar much more comfortable in the Isle of Wight than she had been in London. The old poet told us how Black Care sits behind the horseman, and some modern poet will some day describe to us that terrible goddess as she takes her place with the stoker close to the fire of the locomotive engine. Sitting with Sophie opposite to her, Lady Ongar was not happy, even though her eye rested on the lines of that magnificent coast. Once indeed, on the evening of their first day, Sophie left her, and she was alone for nearly an hour. Ah, how happy could she have been if Harry Clavering might have been there with her. Perhaps a day might come in which Harry might bring her there. In such a case Atra Cura would be left behind, and then she might be altogether happy. She sat dreaming of this for above an hour, and Sophie was still away. When Sophie returned, which she did all too soon, she explained that she had been in her bedroom. She had been very busy, and now had come down to make herself comfortable.

Lady Ongar wasn’t much more at ease on the Isle of Wight than she had been in London. The old poet used to say that Black Care rides behind the horseman, and someday a modern poet will depict that awful goddess settling in next to the stoker by the locomotive’s fire. Sitting across from Sophie, Lady Ongar felt unhappy, even with her gaze resting on the beautiful coastline. Once, on their first evening, Sophie left her alone for nearly an hour. How happy she could have been if Harry Clavering had been there with her. Maybe there would come a day when Harry could bring her there. In that case, Atra Cura would be left behind, and she might find complete happiness. She sat lost in this daydream for over an hour, while Sophie was still gone. When Sophie returned, way too soon, she explained that she had been in her bedroom. She had been very busy and was now coming down to get comfortable.

On the next evening Lady Ongar declared her intention of going up on the downs by herself. They had dined at five, so that she might have a long evening, and soon after six she started. "If I do not break down I will get as far as the Needles," she said. Sophie, who had heard that the distance was three miles, lifted up her hands in despair. "If you are not back before nine I shall send the people after you." Consenting to this with a laugh, Lady Ongar made her way up to the downs, and walked steadily on towards the extreme point of the island. To the Needles themselves she did not make her way. These rocks are now approached, as all the stay-at-home travellers know, through a fort, and down to the fort she did not go. But turning a little from the highest point of the hill towards the cliffs on her left hand, she descended till she reached a spot from which she could look down on the pebbly beach lying some three hundred feet below her, and on the soft shining ripple of the quiet waters as they moved themselves with a pleasant sound on the long strand which lay stretched in a line from the spot beneath her out to the point of the island. The evening was warm, and almost transparent in its clearness, and very quiet. There was no sound even of a breeze. When she seated herself close upon the margin of the cliff, she heard the small waves moving the stones which they washed, and the sound was as the sound of little children's voices, very distant. Looking down, she could see through the wonderful transparency of the water, and the pebbles below it were bright as diamonds, and the sands were burnished like gold. And each tiny silent wavelet as it moved up towards the shore and lost itself at last in its own effort, stretched itself the whole length of the strand. Such brightness on the sea-shore she had never seen before, nor had she ever listened as now she listened to that infantine babble of the baby waves. She sat there close upon the margin, on a seat of chalk which the winds had made, looking, listening, and forgetting for a while that she was Lady Ongar whom people did not know, who lived alone in the world with Sophie Gordeloup for her friend,—and whose lover was betrothed to another woman. She had been there perhaps half-an-hour, and had learned to be at home on her perch, sitting there in comfort, with no desire to move, when a voice which she well knew at the first sound startled her, and she rose quickly to her feet. "Lady Ongar," said the voice, "are you not rather near the edge?" As she turned round there was Count Pateroff with his hand already upon her dress, so that no danger might be produced by the suddenness of his speech.

On the next evening, Lady Ongar announced that she was going to walk alone on the downs. They had dinner at five so she could enjoy a long evening, and shortly after six, she set off. "If I don't tire out, I’ll make it to the Needles," she said. Sophie, who had heard that the distance was three miles, threw her hands up in despair. "If you're not back by nine, I’ll send people after you." Agreeing with a laugh, Lady Ongar made her way up to the downs and walked steadily toward the farthest point of the island. She didn’t actually go to the Needles. These rocks are now approached, as all the stay-at-home travelers know, through a fort, and she didn’t go down to the fort. Instead, she turned a bit from the highest point of the hill toward the cliffs on her left and descended until she reached a spot where she could look down on the pebbly beach about three hundred feet below her and on the soft, shining ripples of the calm waters as they gently lapped at the long stretch of shore below her, reaching out to the edge of the island. The evening was warm and clear, and very quiet—there wasn’t even a breeze. When she sat close to the edge of the cliff, she could hear the small waves washing over the stones, and the sound was like the distant voices of little children. Looking down, she saw through the crystal-clear water, and the pebbles beneath sparkled like diamonds, while the sand shone like gold. Each tiny, silent wave as it crept toward the shore and eventually faded away did so all along the beach. She had never seen such brightness at the shore before, nor had she listened as intently as she did now to the soft murmur of the baby waves. She sat there at the edge, on a chalk seat shaped by the wind, looking, listening, and momentarily forgetting that she was Lady Ongar—who was unknown to most, lived alone in the world with Sophie Gordeloup as her friend—and whose lover was engaged to another woman. She had been there for about half an hour, feeling comfortable in her spot, with no desire to move, when a voice she recognized startled her, and she quickly got to her feet. "Lady Ongar," said the voice, "aren't you a bit too close to the edge?" As she turned around, she saw Count Pateroff, with his hand already on her dress, ensuring that no danger resulted from the suddenness of his words.

"Lady Ongar, are you not rather near the edge?"
"Lady Ongar, are you not a bit too close to the edge?"
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"There is nothing to fear," she said, stepping back from her seat. As she did so, he dropped his hand from her dress, and, raising it to his head, lifted his hat from his forehead. "You will excuse me, I hope, Lady Ongar," he said, "for having taken this mode of speaking to you."

"There’s nothing to be afraid of," she said, stepping back from her seat. As she did this, he let his hand fall from her dress and, raising it to his head, took his hat off his forehead. "I hope you’ll forgive me, Lady Ongar," he said, "for speaking to you like this."

"I certainly shall not excuse you; nor, further than I can help it, shall I listen to you."

"I definitely won't excuse you; and I won't listen to you any more than I have to."

"There are a few words which I must say."

"There are a few things I need to say."

"Count Pateroff, I beg that you will leave me. This is treacherous and unmanly,—and can do you no good. By what right do you follow me here?"

"Count Pateroff, I ask you to leave me alone. This is deceitful and cowardly—and it won't benefit you at all. What gives you the right to follow me here?"

"I follow you for your own good, Lady Ongar; I do it that you may hear me say a few words that are necessary for you to hear."

"I’m looking out for you, Lady Ongar; I’m doing this so you can hear me say a few important things you need to know."

"I will hear no words from you,—that is, none willingly. By this time you ought to know me and to understand me." She had begun to walk up the hill very rapidly, and for a moment or two he had thought that she would escape him; but her breath had soon failed her, and she found herself compelled to stand while he regained his place beside her. This he had not done without an effort, and for some minutes they were both silent. "It is very beautiful," at last he said, pointing away over the sea.

"I don’t want to hear anything from you—at least, not if you’re speaking willingly. By now, you should know me and understand me." She started walking up the hill quickly, and for a moment, he thought she would get away from him; but she quickly ran out of breath and had to stop while he caught up to her. He didn’t do that easily, and they were both silent for a few minutes. "It’s really beautiful," he finally said, pointing out over the sea.

"Yes;—it is very beautiful," she answered. "Why did you disturb me when I was so happy?" But the count was still recovering his breath, and made no answer to this question. When, however, she attempted to move on again, still breasting the hill, he put his hand upon her arm very gently.

"Yes; it's really beautiful," she replied. "Why did you interrupt me when I was so happy?" But the count was still catching his breath and didn’t respond to her question. When she tried to move on again, still pushing up the hill, he gently placed his hand on her arm.

"Lady Ongar," he said, "you must listen to me for a moment. Why not do it without a quarrel?"

"Lady Ongar," he said, "please listen to me for a moment. Why not do this without arguing?"

"If you mean that I cannot escape from you, it is true enough."

"If you mean that I can't escape from you, that's true."

"Why should you want to escape? Did I ever hurt you? Before this have I not protected you from injury?"

"Why do you want to run away? Did I ever hurt you? Haven't I always kept you safe from harm?"

"No;—never. You protect me!"

"No; never. You’ve got my back!"

"Yes;—I; from your husband, from yourself, and from the world. You do not know,—not yet, all that I have done for you. Did you read what Lord Ongar had said?"

"Yes;—I; from your husband, from you, and from everyone else. You don't know—at least not yet, everything I've done for you. Did you see what Lord Ongar said?"

"I read what it pleased you to write."

"I read what you chose to write."

"What it pleased me! Do you pretend to think that Lord Ongar did not speak as he speaks there? Do you not know that those were his own words? Do you not recognize them? Ah, yes, Lady Ongar; you know them to be true."

"What a delight it was for me! Do you really think that Lord Ongar didn’t say what he said there? Don’t you know those were his exact words? Can’t you recognize them? Ah, yes, Lady Ongar; you know they are true."

"Their truth or falsehood is nothing to me. They are altogether indifferent to me either way."

"Their truth or falsehood doesn’t matter to me. I feel completely indifferent to both."

"That would be very well if it were possible; but it is not. There; now we are at the top, and it will be easier. Will you let me have the honour to offer you my arm? No! Be it so; but I think you would walk the easier. It would not be for the first time."

"That would be great if it were possible, but it’s not. There; now we’re at the top, and it’ll be easier. May I have the honor of offering you my arm? No? Alright; but I think you’d find it easier to walk this way. It wouldn’t be the first time."

"That is a falsehood." As she spoke she stepped before him, and looked into his face with eyes full of passion. "That is a positive falsehood. I never walked with a hand resting on your arm."

"That is a lie." As she spoke, she stepped in front of him and looked into his face with eyes full of emotion. "That's a complete lie. I never walked with my hand resting on your arm."

There came over his face the pleasantest smile as he answered her. "You forget everything," he said;—"everything. But it does not matter. Other people will not forget. Julie, you had better take me for your husband. You will be better as my wife, and happier, than you can be otherwise."

There was the most pleasant smile on his face as he replied to her. "You forget everything," he said;—"everything. But it doesn’t matter. Other people won’t forget. Julie, you should marry me. You’ll be better as my wife and happier than you could be any other way."

"Look down there, Count Pateroff;—down to the edge. If my misery is too great to be borne, I can escape from it there on better terms than you propose to me."

"Look down there, Count Pateroff;—to the edge. If my suffering is too much to handle, I can break free from it there on better terms than what you're offering me."

"Ah! That is what we call poetry. Poetry is very pretty, and in saying this as you do, you make yourself divine. But to be dashed over the cliffs and broken on the rocks;—in prose it is not so well."

"Ah! That’s what we call poetry. Poetry is beautiful, and by saying this, you make yourself seem divine. But getting dashed over cliffs and smashed on the rocks—in prose, it doesn’t work the same way."

"Sir, will you allow me to pass on while you remain; or will you let me rest here, while you return alone?"

"Sir, will you let me go on while you stay here; or will you let me stay here while you go back alone?"

"No, Julie; not so. I have found you with too much difficulty. In London, you see, I could not find you. Here, for a minute, you must listen to me. Do you not know, Julie, that your character is in my hands?"

"No, Julie; that's not how it is. I've searched for you too hard. In London, you know, I couldn't find you. Here, for just a moment, you have to listen to me. Don't you realize, Julie, that your reputation is in my hands?"

"In your hands? No;—never; thank God, never. But what if it were?"

"In your hands? No;—never; thank God, never. But what if it were?"

"Only this,—that I am forced to play the only game that you leave open to me. Chance brought you and me together in such a way that nothing but marriage can be beneficial to either of us;—and I swore to Lord Ongar that it should be so. I mean that it shall be so,—or that you shall be punished for your misconduct to him and to me."

"Only this: I have no choice but to play the only hand you've left me. Fate brought us together in a way that only marriage can truly benefit us both; and I promised Lord Ongar that it would be this way. I mean that it will be this way—or you will face consequences for your behavior toward him and me."

"You are both insolent and false. But listen to me, since you are here and I cannot avoid you. I know what your threats mean."

"You’re both rude and dishonest. But hear me out, since you’re here and I can’t get away from you. I understand what your threats mean."

"I have never threatened you. I have promised you my aid, but have used no threats."

"I've never threatened you. I've offered you my help, but I haven't made any threats."

"Not when you tell me that I shall be punished? But to avoid no punishment, if any be in your power, will I ever willingly place myself in your company. You may write of me what papers you please, and repeat of me whatever stories you may choose to fabricate, but you will not frighten me into compliance by doing so. I have, at any rate, spirit enough to resist such attempts as that."

"Not when you say that I'm going to be punished? But to avoid any punishment that you can give me, I will never willingly put myself in your presence. You can write whatever articles you want about me and tell whatever stories you want to make up, but you won’t scare me into going along with it. I have enough spirit to stand up against such attempts."

"As you are living at present, you are alone in the world!"

"As you live now, you are all alone in the world!"

"And I am content to remain alone."

"And I'm okay with staying alone."

"You are thinking, then, of no second marriage?"

"You don't have any plans for a second marriage, right?"

"If I were, does that concern you? But I will speak no further word to you. If you follow me into the inn, or persecute me further by forcing yourself upon me, I will put myself under the protection of the police."

"If I were, would that bother you? But I won’t say anything more to you. If you follow me into the inn or keep harassing me, I will call the police for help."

Having said this, she walked on as quickly as her strength would permit, while he walked by her side, urging upon her his old arguments as to Lord Ongar's expressed wishes, as to his own efforts on her behalf,—and at last as to the strong affection with which he regarded her. But she kept her promise, and said not a word in answer to it all. For more than an hour they walked side by side, and during the greater part of that time not a syllable escaped from her. From moment to moment she kept her eye warily on him, fearing that he might take her by the arm, or attempt some violence with her. But he was too wise for this, and too fully conscious that no such proceeding on his part could be of any service to him. He continued, however, to speak to her words which she could not avoid hearing,—hoping rather than thinking that he might at last frighten her by a description of all the evil which it was within his power to do her. But in acting thus he showed that he knew nothing of her character. She was not a woman whom any prospect of evil could possibly frighten into a distasteful marriage.

Having said that, she walked on as quickly as her strength allowed, while he walked beside her, repeating his old arguments about Lord Ongar's wishes, his own efforts on her behalf, and finally his strong affection for her. But she kept her promise and didn’t say a word in response. For more than an hour, they walked side by side, and for most of that time, she remained silent. She kept a wary eye on him, afraid he might take her arm or try something forceful. But he was too smart for that and fully aware that any such move wouldn’t help his case. Still, he kept speaking to her, saying things she couldn’t help but hear, hoping more than believing that he might eventually scare her into submission by threatening her with all the harm he could do. But by doing this, he showed he didn’t understand her character at all. She wasn’t the kind of woman who could be scared into a marriage she didn’t want by any threat of evil.

Within a few hundred yards of the hotel there is another fort, and at this point the path taken by Lady Ongar led into the private grounds of the inn at which she was staying. Here the count left her, raising his hat as he did so, and saying that he hoped to see her again before she left the island.

Within a few hundred yards of the hotel, there’s another fort, and at this spot, the path that Lady Ongar took led into the private grounds of the inn where she was staying. Here, the count said goodbye, tipping his hat as he did so, and mentioned that he hoped to see her again before she left the island.

"If you do so," said she, "it shall be in presence of those who can protect me." And so they parted.

"If you do that," she said, "it will be in front of people who can protect me." And so they went their separate ways.

 

 

CHAPTER XXVIII.

WHAT CECILIA BURTON DID FOR HER SISTER-IN-LAW.

As soon as Harry Clavering had made his promise to Mr. Burton, and had declared that he would be in Onslow Crescent that same evening, he went away from the offices at the Adelphi, feeling it to be quite impossible that he should recommence his work there at that moment, even should it ever be within his power to do so. Nor did Burton expect that he should stay. He understood, from what had passed, much of Harry's trouble, if not the whole of it; and though he did not despair on behalf of his sister, he was aware that her lover had fallen into a difficulty, from which he could not extricate himself without great suffering and much struggling. But Burton was a man who, in spite of something cynical on the surface of his character, believed well of mankind generally, and well also of men as individuals. Even though Harry had done amiss, he might be saved. And though Harry's conduct to Florence might have been bad, nay, might have been false, still, as Burton believed, he was too good to be cast aside, or spurned out of the way, without some further attempt to save him.

AAs soon as Harry Clavering promised Mr. Burton that he would be in Onslow Crescent that evening, he left the offices at the Adelphi, feeling it was impossible to return to his work there at that moment, even if he ever could. Burton didn’t expect him to stay either. He understood much of Harry's struggles, if not all of them, and while he didn’t lose hope for his sister, he recognized that her boyfriend was in a tough situation he couldn't get out of without significant pain and effort. But Burton was someone who, despite a somewhat cynical exterior, generally believed the best in people and in individuals. Even if Harry had made mistakes, he could still be redeemed. And although Harry's treatment of Florence might have been wrong, or even deceitful, Burton believed he was too decent to just be dismissed or cast aside without trying to help him first.

When Clavering had left him Burton went back to his work, and after a while succeeded in riveting his mind on the papers before him. It was a hard struggle with him, but he did it, and did not leave his business till his usual hour. It was past five when he took down his hat and his umbrella, and, as I fear, dusted his boots before he passed out of the office on to the passage. As he went he gave sundry directions to porters and clerks, as was his wont, and then walked off intent upon his usual exercise before he should reach his home.

When Clavering left, Burton went back to his work and eventually managed to focus on the papers in front of him. It was a tough struggle, but he managed to do it and didn’t leave his office until his usual time. It was after five when he grabbed his hat and umbrella and, as I’m afraid to say, wiped the dust off his boots before stepping out of the office into the hallway. As he walked out, he gave various instructions to the porters and clerks, as was his habit, and then headed off, focused on getting his usual exercise before reaching home.

But he had to determine on much with reference to Florence and Harry before he saw his wife. How was the meeting of the evening to take place, and in what way should it be commenced? If there were indispensable cause for his anger, in what way should he show it, and if necessity for vengeance, how should his sister be avenged? There is nothing more difficult for a man than the redressing of injuries done to a woman who is very near to him and very dear to him. The whole theory of Christian meekness and forgiveness becomes broken to pieces and falls to the ground, almost as an absurd theory, even at the idea of such wrong. What man ever forgave an insult to his wife or an injury to his sister, because he had taught himself that to forgive trespasses is a religious duty? Without an argument, without a moment's thought, the man declares to himself that such trespasses as those are not included in the general order. But what is he to do? Thirty years since his course was easy, and unless the sinner were a clergyman, he could in some sort satisfy his craving for revenge by taking a pistol in his hand, and having a shot at the offender. That method was doubtless barbarous and unreasonable, but it was satisfactory and sufficed. But what can he do now? A thoughtful, prudent, painstaking man, such as was Theodore Burton, feels that it is not given to him to attack another with his fists, to fly at his enemy's throat, and carry out his purpose after the manner of dogs. Such a one has probably something round his heart which tells him that if so attacked he could defend himself; but he knows that he has no aptitude for making such onslaught, and is conscious that such deeds of arms would be unbecoming to him. In many, perhaps in most of such cases, he may, if he please, have recourse to the laws. But any aid that the law can give him is altogether distasteful to him. The name of her that is so dear to him should be kept quiet as the grave under such misfortune, not blazoned through ten thousand columns for the amusement of all the crowd. There is nothing left for him but to spurn the man,—not with his foot but with his thoughts; and the bitter consciousness that to such spurning the sinner will be indifferent. The old way was barbarous certainly, and unreasonable,—but there was a satisfaction in it that has been often wanting since the use of pistols went out of fashion among us.

But he had to figure out a lot regarding Florence and Harry before he saw his wife. How was the evening meeting going to happen, and how should it start? If he had good reason to be angry, how should he express it, and if he needed revenge, how should he get it for his sister? There’s nothing more challenging for a man than correcting wrongs done to a woman who is very close to him and very dear to him. The whole idea of Christian meekness and forgiveness falls apart and seems absurd when faced with such a wrong. What man ever forgave an insult to his wife or an injury to his sister because he believed that forgiving trespasses is a religious duty? Without a second thought, he tells himself that these kinds of wrongs don’t fall under that rule. But what is he supposed to do? Thirty years ago, things were simpler; unless the wrongdoer was a clergyman, he could ease his desire for revenge by grabbing a gun and taking a shot at the offender. That approach was definitely brutal and irrational, but it was satisfying and worked. But what can he do now? A thoughtful, careful, and diligent man like Theodore Burton feels that it’s not in him to physically attack someone or go after his enemy like a dog. He probably has something in his heart that tells him he could defend himself if attacked, but he knows he’s not made for such aggression and understands that violent acts wouldn’t suit him. In many, maybe most cases, he could turn to the law if he wanted to. But any help from the law is completely unappealing to him. The name of someone so precious to him should be kept as quiet as the grave under such misfortune, not splashed across countless headlines for everyone to gawk at. All that’s left for him is to disdain the man—not with his foot, but with his thoughts; and the painful realization that to such scorn, the wrongdoer will be indifferent. The old way was certainly brutal and unreasonable—but there was a satisfaction in it that has often been missing since guns went out of fashion.

All this passed through Burton's mind as he walked home. One would not have supposed him to be a man eager for bloodshed,—he with a wife whom he deemed to be perfect, with children who in his eyes were gracious as young gods, with all his daily work which he loved as good workers always do; but yet, as he thought of Florence, as he thought of the possibility of treachery on Harry's part, he regarded almost with dismay the conclusion to which he was forced to come,—that there could be no punishment. He might proclaim the offender to the world as false, and the world would laugh at the proclaimer, and shake hands with the offender. To sit together with such a man on a barrel of powder, or fight him over a handkerchief, seemed to him to be reasonable, nay salutary, under such a grievance. There are sins, he felt, which the gods should punish with instant thunderbolts, and such sins as this were of such a nature. His Florence,—pure, good, loving, true, herself totally void of all suspicion, faultless in heart as well as mind, the flower of that Burton flock which had prospered so well,—that she should be sacrificed through the treachery of a man who, at his best, had scarcely been worthy of her! The thought of this was almost too much for him, and he gnashed his teeth as he went on his way.

All of this raced through Burton's mind as he walked home. You wouldn't think he was a man craving violence—he had a wife he believed was perfect, children he saw as beautiful as young deities, and work he loved like any dedicated worker does. But as he thought about Florence and the possibility of Harry's betrayal, he was almost disheartened by the conclusion he came to—that there could be no punishment. He could expose the wrongdoer to the world as a fraud, and the world would just laugh at him and shake hands with the betrayer. The idea of sitting with such a man on a ticking time bomb, or fighting him over a handkerchief, seemed not just reasonable but necessary in light of such an injustice. There are sins, he thought, that the gods should punish with immediate wrath, and this was one of those. His Florence—pure, good, loving, and true, completely free of any doubt, flawless in both heart and mind, the pride of that Burton family that had thrived so well—that she could be betrayed by a man who, at his best, barely deserved her! Just the thought of it was almost unbearable, and he clenched his teeth as he continued on his way.

But yet he had not given up the man. Though he could not restrain himself from foreshadowing the misery that would result from such baseness, yet he told himself that he would not condemn before condemnation was necessary. Harry Clavering might not be good enough for Florence. What man was good enough for Florence? But still, if married, Harry, he thought, would not make a bad husband. Many a man who is prone enough to escape from the bonds which he has undertaken to endure,—to escape from them before they are riveted,—is mild enough under their endurance, when they are once fastened upon him. Harry Clavering was not of such a nature that Burton could tell himself that it would be well that his sister should escape even though her way of escape must lie through the fire and water of outraged love. That Harry Clavering was a gentleman, that he was clever, that he was by nature affectionate, soft in manner, tender of heart, anxious to please, good-tempered, and of high ambition, Burton knew well; and he partly recognized the fact that Harry had probably fallen into his present fault more by accident than by design. Clavering was not a skilled and practiced deceiver. At last, as he drew near to his own door, he resolved on the line of conduct he would pursue. He would tell his wife everything, and she should receive Harry alone.

But he still hadn't given up on the guy. Even though he couldn't help but predict the misery that would come from such a low move, he reminded himself that he wouldn't judge until it was absolutely necessary. Harry Clavering might not be good enough for Florence. What guy really was good enough for her? Still, if he did marry, Harry wouldn't be a bad husband, he thought. Lots of men who tend to run away from the commitments they’ve taken on — escaping before those chains are fully attached — often turn out to be pretty decent once they’re locked in. Harry Clavering wasn’t the kind of guy Burton could convince himself that it would be better for his sister to dodge, even if it meant going through the painful fires of love lost. Burton knew that Harry was a gentleman, smart, naturally caring, soft-spoken, kind-hearted, eager to please, easy-going, and ambitious. He also somewhat recognized that Harry probably fell into his current faults more by chance than by intention. Clavering wasn’t a crafty and seasoned liar. Finally, as he approached his own door, he decided on the course of action he would take. He would tell his wife everything, and she would meet Harry alone.

He was weary when he reached home, and was a little cross with his fatigue. Good man as he was, he was apt to be fretful on the first moment of his return to his own house, hot with walking, tired with his day's labour, and in want of his dinner. His wife understood this well, and always bore with him at such moments, coming down to him in the dressing-room behind the back parlour, and ministering to his wants. I fear he took some advantage of her goodness, knowing that at such moments he could grumble and scold without danger of contradiction. But the institution was established, and Cecilia never rebelled against its traditional laws. On the present day he had much to say to her, but even that he could not say without some few symptoms of petulant weariness.

He was tired when he got home and a bit irritable from his exhaustion. As good as he was, he tended to be a bit grumpy the moment he returned to his own house, sweaty from walking, worn out from the day’s work, and in need of his dinner. His wife understood this well and always put up with him during those times, coming down to him in the dressing room behind the back parlor and taking care of his needs. I worry that he took advantage of her kindness, knowing he could complain and scold without fear of pushback. But this routine was well established, and Cecilia never fought against its unwritten rules. On that day, he had plenty to share with her, but even then, he couldn't express it without some signs of petulant fatigue.

"I'm afraid you've had a terrible long day," she said.

"I'm sorry you've had such a long day," she said.

"I don't know what you call terribly long. I find the days terribly short. I have had Harry with me, as I told you I should."

"I don’t know what you mean by terribly long. I think the days are really short. I’ve had Harry here with me, like I mentioned I would."

"Well, well. Say in one word, dear, that it is all right,—if it is so."

"Well, well. Just say in one word, darling, that it's all good—if that's the case."

"But it is not all right. I wonder what on earth the men do to the boots, that I can never get a pair that do not hurt me in walking." At this moment she was standing over him with his slippers.

"But it’s not okay. I really don’t understand what the guys do to the boots because I can never find a pair that doesn’t hurt my feet when I walk." At this moment, she was standing over him with his slippers.

"Will you have a glass of sherry before dinner, dear; you are so tired?"

"Would you like a glass of sherry before dinner, dear? You look so tired."

"Sherry—no!"

"Sherry, no!"

"And what about Harry? You don't mean to say—"

"And what about Harry? You can't be saying—"

"If you'll listen, I'll tell you what I do mean to say." Then he described to her as well as he could, what had really taken place between him and Harry Clavering at the office.

"If you'll listen, I'll tell you what I really mean." Then he explained to her as best as he could what had actually happened between him and Harry Clavering at the office.

"He cannot mean to be false, if he is coming here," said the wife.

"He can't be pretending if he's coming here," said the wife.

"He does not mean to be false; but he is one of those men who can be false without meaning it,—who allow themselves to drift away from their anchors, and to be carried out into seas of misery and trouble, because they are not careful in looking to their tackle. I think that he may still be held to a right course, and therefore I have begged him to come here."

"He doesn’t intend to be dishonest; he’s just one of those guys who can be untruthful without realizing it—who let themselves drift away from their anchors and get swept into seas of hardship and trouble because they aren’t careful with their gear. I believe he can still be steered back on the right path, so I’ve asked him to come here."

"I am sure that you are right, Theodore. He is so good and so affectionate, and he made himself so much one of us!"

"I’m sure you’re right, Theodore. He’s so good and so caring, and he really became one of us!"

"Yes; too easily by half. That is just the danger. But look here, Cissy. I'll tell you what I mean to do. I will not see him myself;—at any rate, not at first. Probably I had better not see him at all. You shall talk to him."

"Yes; way too easily. That’s the real problem. But listen, Cissy. Here’s my plan. I won’t meet him myself; at least, not right away. It’s probably best if I don’t see him at all. You can talk to him."

"By myself!"

"All alone!"

"Why not? You and he have always been great friends, and he is a man who can speak more openly to a woman than to another man."

"Why not? You and he have always been great friends, and he’s someone who can talk more freely with a woman than with another man."

"And what shall I say as to your absence?"

"And what should I say about your absence?"

"Just the truth. Tell him that I am remaining in the dining-room because I think his task will be easier with you in my absence. He has got himself into some mess with that woman."

"Just the truth. Tell him that I'm staying in the dining room because I think his job will be easier with you here instead of me. He's gotten himself into some trouble with that woman."

"With Lady Ongar?"

"With Lady Ongar?"

"Yes; not that her name was mentioned between us, but I suppose it is so."

"Yeah; not that we mentioned her name, but I guess that's how it is."

"Horrible woman;—wicked, wretched creature!"

"Terrible woman;—evil, miserable person!"

"I know nothing about that, nor, as I suppose, do you."

"I don't know anything about that, and I guess you don't either."

"My dear, you must have heard."

"My dear, you must have heard."

"But if I had,—and I don't know that I have,—I need not have believed. I am told that she married an old man who is now dead, and I suppose she wants a young husband."

"But if I did, —and I don't know that I did,—I wouldn't have to believe it. I've heard she married an old man who is now dead, and I assume she wants a young husband."

"My dear!"

"My love!"

"If I were you, Cissy, I would say as little as might be about her. She was an old friend of Harry's—"

"If I were you, Cissy, I would say as little as possible about her. She was an old friend of Harry's—

"She jilted him when he was quite a boy; I know that;—long before he had seen our Florence."

"She left him when he was just a kid; I know that;—long before he had seen our Florence."

"And she is connected with him through his cousin. Let her be ever so bad, I should drop that."

"And she is connected to him through his cousin. No matter how bad she is, I should just let that go."

"You can't suppose, Theodore, that I want even to mention her name. I'm told that nobody ever visits her."

"You can't seriously think, Theodore, that I want to bring up her name. I've heard that no one ever goes to see her."

"She needn't be a bit the worse on that account. Whenever I hear that there is a woman whom nobody visits, I always feel inclined to go and pay my respects to her."

"She doesn't have to be any worse off because of that. Whenever I hear about a woman who's not getting any visitors, I always feel like I should go and pay my respects to her."

"Theodore, how can you say so?"

"Theodore, how can you say that?"

"And that, I suppose, is just what Harry has done. If the world and his wife had visited Lady Ongar, there would not have been all this trouble now."

"And I guess that’s exactly what Harry has done. If everyone and their spouse had gone to see Lady Ongar, we wouldn’t be dealing with all this trouble now."

Mrs. Burton of course undertook the task which her husband assigned to her, though she did so with much nervous trepidation, and many fears lest the desired object should be lost through her own maladroit management. With her, there was at least no doubt as to the thing to be done,—no hesitation as to the desirability of securing Harry Clavering for the Burton faction. Everything in her mind was to be forgiven to Harry, and he was to be received by them all with open arms and loving caresses, if he would only abandon Lady Ongar altogether. To secure her lover for Florence, was Mrs. Burton's single and simple object. She raised no questions now within her own breast as to whether Harry would make a good husband. Any such question as that should have been asked and answered before he had been accepted at Stratton. The thing to be done now was to bring Harry and Florence together, and,—since such terrible dangers were intervening,—to make them man and wife with as little further delay as might be possible. The name of Lady Ongar was odious to her. When men went astray in matters of love it was within the power of Cecilia Burton's heart to forgive them; but she could not pardon women that so sinned. This countess had once jilted Harry, and that was enough to secure her condemnation. And since that what terrible things had been said of her! And dear, uncharitable Cecilia Burton was apt to think, when evil was spoken of women,—of women whom she did not know,—that there could not be smoke without fire. And now this woman was a widow with a large fortune, and wanted a husband! What business had any widow to want a husband? It is so easy for wives to speak and think after that fashion when they are satisfied with their own ventures.

Mrs. Burton took on the task her husband assigned to her, even though she felt nervous and worried that she might mess it up. For her, there was no doubt about what needed to be done—no hesitation about the importance of securing Harry Clavering for the Burton side. In her mind, Harry was to be forgiven for everything, and he would be welcomed with open arms and affection, as long as he completely left Lady Ongar behind. Mrs. Burton's sole focus was to bring her lover to Florence. She didn’t question whether Harry would make a good husband; that should have been resolved before he was accepted at Stratton. What needed to happen now was to unite Harry and Florence and, given the terrible obstacles they faced, to marry them as soon as possible. The name of Lady Ongar disgusted her. When men went off track in love, Cecilia Burton could find it in her heart to forgive them, but she couldn’t forgive women who acted similarly. This countess had once jilted Harry, and that was enough for Cecilia to condemn her. And since then, terrible things had been said about her! Cecilia, who was not very charitable, often thought that when women she didn’t know were spoken of negatively, there couldn’t be smoke without fire. Now this woman was a widow with a large fortune, looking for a husband! What right did any widow have to want a husband? It’s easy for wives to think and speak that way when they’re content with their own situations.

It was arranged that when Harry came to the door, Mrs. Burton should go up alone to the drawing-room and receive him there, remaining with her husband in the dining-room till he should come. Twice while sitting downstairs after the cloth was gone she ran upstairs with the avowed purpose of going into the nursery, but in truth that she might see that the room was comfortable, that it looked pretty, and that the chairs were so arranged as to be convenient. The two eldest children were with them in the parlour, and when she started on her second errand, Cissy reminded her that baby would be asleep. Theodore, who understood the little manœuvre, smiled but said nothing, and his wife, who in such matters was resolute, went and made her further little changes in the furniture. At last there came the knock at the door,—the expected knock, a knock which told something of the hesitating unhappy mind of him who had rapped, and Mrs. Burton started on her business. "Tell him just simply why you are there alone," said her husband.

It was decided that when Harry arrived at the door, Mrs. Burton would go up to the drawing-room by herself and greet him there, while her husband stayed in the dining room until he arrived. Twice, while sitting downstairs after the table was cleared, she hurried upstairs claiming she was going to check on the nursery, but really, she wanted to make sure the room was cozy, looked nice, and that the chairs were arranged comfortably. The two oldest children were with them in the parlor, and when she set off on her second trip, Cissy reminded her that the baby would be sleeping. Theodore, who knew what she was up to, smiled but said nothing, and his wife, who was determined in these matters, went ahead and made some more adjustments to the furniture. Finally, there came the knock at the door—the knock they had been expecting, a knock that hinted at the uncertain and unhappy state of mind of the person who had tapped. Mrs. Burton then went about her task. "Just tell him simply why you are alone," her husband advised.

"Is it Harry Clavering?" Cissy asked, "and mayn't I go?"

"Is it Harry Clavering?" Cissy asked, "and can I go?"

"It is Harry Clavering," her father said, "and you may not go. Indeed, it is time you went somewhere else."

"It’s Harry Clavering," her father said, "and you can’t go. In fact, it’s time for you to be somewhere else."

It was Harry Clavering. He had not spent a pleasant day since he had left Mr. Beilby's offices in the morning, and, now that he had come to Onslow Crescent, he did not expect to spend a pleasant evening. When I declare that as yet he had not come to any firm resolution, I fear that he will be held as being too weak for the rôle of hero even in such pages as these. Perhaps no terms have been so injurious to the profession of the novelist as those two words, hero and heroine. In spite of the latitude which is allowed to the writer in putting his own interpretation upon these words, something heroic is still expected; whereas, if he attempt to paint from Nature, how little that is heroic should he describe! How many young men, subjected to the temptations which had befallen Harry Clavering,—how many young men whom you, delicate reader, number among your friends,—would have come out from them unscathed? A man, you say, delicate reader, a true man can love but one woman,—but one at a time. So you say, and are so convinced; but no conviction was ever more false. When a true man has loved with all his heart and all his soul,—does he cease to love,—does he cleanse his heart of that passion when circumstances run against him, and he is forced to turn elsewhere for his life's companion? Or is he untrue as a lover in that he does not waste his life in desolation, because he has been disappointed? Or does his old love perish and die away, because another has crept into his heart? No; the first love, if that was true, is ever there; and should she and he meet after many years, though their heads be gray and their cheeks wrinkled, there will still be a touch of the old passion as their hands meet for a moment. Methinks that love never dies, unless it be murdered by downright ill-usage. It may be so murdered, but even ill-usage will more often fail than succeed in that enterprise. How, then, could Harry fail to love the woman whom he had loved first, when she returned to him still young, still beautiful, and told him, with all her charms and all her flattery, how her heart stood towards him?

It was Harry Clavering. He hadn't had a good day since he left Mr. Beilby's office in the morning, and now that he had arrived at Onslow Crescent, he didn't expect to have a nice evening. If I say that he still hadn't come to any solid decision, I worry that people will think he's too weak to be a hero, even in a story like this. Perhaps no terms have damaged the reputation of novelists more than "hero" and "heroine." Even though writers can interpret these words as they wish, something heroic is still expected; however, if they try to depict reality, how little of it is truly heroic! How many young men, faced with the same temptations as Harry Clavering—how many young men you, dear reader, count among your friends—would come out of it unscathed? You say that a true man can love only one woman—only one at a time. So you believe, and you’re sure of it; but no belief could be more mistaken. When a true man has loved wholeheartedly, does he stop loving or rid himself of that feeling when circumstances force him to seek a different companion for life? Is he disloyal as a lover by not wallowing in sorrow after disappointment? Does his old love fade away simply because someone else has entered his heart? No; that first love, if it was genuine, is always there. And if they meet again after many years, even if they have gray hair and wrinkled cheeks, there will still be a flicker of the old feelings as they briefly hold hands. I think love never dies, unless it's killed by downright mistreatment. It can be killed, but even mistreatment often fails in that endeavor. So how could Harry stop loving the woman he first loved, when she returned to him still young, still beautiful, and expressed her feelings for him with all her charms and flattery?

But it is not to be thought that I excuse him altogether. A man, though he may love many, should be devoted only to one. The man's feeling to the woman whom he is to marry should be this:—that not from love only, but from chivalry, from manhood, and from duty, he will be prepared always, and at all hazards, to defend her from every misadventure, to struggle ever that she may be happy, to see that no wind blows upon her with needless severity, that no ravening wolf of a misery shall come near her, that her path be swept clean for her,—as clean as may be, and that her roof-tree be made firm upon a rock. There is much of this which is quite independent of love,—much of it that may be done without love. This is devotion, and it is this which a man owes to the woman who has once promised to be his wife, and has not forfeited her right. Doubtless Harry Clavering should have remembered this at the first moment of his weakness in Lady Ongar's drawing-room. Doubtless he should have known at once that his duty to Florence made it necessary that he should declare his engagement,—even though, in doing so, he might have seemed to caution Lady Ongar on that point on which no woman can endure a caution. But the fault was hers, and the caution was needed. No doubt he should not have returned to Bolton Street. He should not have cozened himself by trusting himself to her assurances of friendship; he should have kept warm his love for the woman to whom his hand was owed, not suffering himself to make comparisons to her injury. He should have been chivalric, manly, full of high duty. He should have been all this, and full also of love, and then he would have been a hero. But men as I see them are not often heroic.

But let's not think I completely excuse him. A man, even if he loves many, should be devoted to just one. The feelings a man should have for the woman he intends to marry should be this:—that not just out of love, but also out of respect, strength, and duty, he will always be ready to protect her from any trouble, to fight for her happiness, to ensure that no harsh winds blow on her, that no overwhelming misery approaches her, that her path is as clear as possible, and that her home is built on solid ground. Much of this is completely independent of love—there's a lot he can do without love. This is commitment, and it's what a man owes to the woman who has promised to be his wife and hasn’t lost that right. Clearly, Harry Clavering should have remembered this the moment he faltered in Lady Ongar's living room. He should have immediately understood that his duty to Florence required him to announce his engagement—even if it meant warning Lady Ongar about something that no woman can stand being warned about. But the fault was hers, and the warning was necessary. No doubt he shouldn’t have gone back to Bolton Street. He shouldn’t have fooled himself into believing her claims of friendship; he should have kept his love for the woman he was committed to and not allowed himself to make comparisons that would harm her. He should have been noble, strong, and full of duty. He should have embodied all of that, along with love, and then he would have been a hero. But, based on what I see, men aren't often heroic.

As he entered the room he saw Mrs. Burton at once, and then looked round quickly for her husband. "Harry," said she, "I am so glad to see you once again," and she gave him her hand, and smiled on him with that sweet look which used to make him feel that it was pleasant to be near her. He took her hand and muttered some word of greeting, and then looked round again for Mr. Burton. "Theodore is not here," she said; "he thought it better that you and I should have a little talk together. He said you would like it best so; but perhaps I ought not to tell you that."

As he walked into the room, he spotted Mrs. Burton right away and quickly scanned the area for her husband. "Harry," she said, "I'm so glad to see you again," and she extended her hand to him, smiling with that lovely look that always made him feel happy to be around her. He took her hand and mumbled a greeting, then looked around again for Mr. Burton. "Theodore isn't here," she said; "he thought it would be better for us to have a little chat together. He mentioned that you would prefer it this way; but maybe I shouldn't have told you that."

"I do like it best so,—much best. I can speak to you as I could hardly speak to him."

"I really like it this way—so much more. I can talk to you like I could hardly talk to him."

"What is it, Harry, that ails you? What has kept you away from us? Why do you leave poor Flo so long without writing to her? She will be here on Monday. You will come and see her then; or perhaps you will go with me and meet her at the station?"

"What’s wrong, Harry? What’s kept you away from us? Why have you left poor Flo waiting so long for a letter? She'll be here on Monday. Will you come see her then, or maybe you’ll join me to meet her at the station?"

"Burton said that she was coming, but I did not understand that it was so soon."

"Burton said she was coming, but I didn’t realize it would be so soon."

"You do not think it too soon, Harry; do you?"

"You don't think it's too soon, Harry; do you?"

"No," said Harry, but his tone belied his assertion. At any rate he had not pretended to display any of a lover's rapture at this prospect of seeing the lady whom he loved.

"No," said Harry, but his tone contradicted his words. In any case, he hadn't attempted to show any of a lover's excitement about the chance to see the woman he loved.

"Sit down, Harry. Why do you stand like that and look so comfortless? Theodore says that you have some trouble at heart. Is it a trouble that you can tell to a friend such as I am?"

"Sit down, Harry. Why are you standing like that and looking so uncomfortable? Theodore says you have something bothering you. Is it something you can share with a friend like me?"

"It is very hard to tell. Oh, Mrs. Burton, I am broken-hearted. For the last two weeks I have wished that I might die."

"It’s really difficult to say. Oh, Mrs. Burton, I’m heartbroken. For the past two weeks, I’ve wished I could just die."

"Do not say that, Harry; that would be wicked."

"Don’t say that, Harry; that would be wrong."

"Wicked or not, it is true. I have been so wretched that I have not known how to hold myself. I could not bring myself to write to Florence."

"Wicked or not, it's true. I've felt so miserable that I haven't known how to compose myself. I couldn't bring myself to write to Florence."

"But why not? You do not mean that you are false to Florence. You cannot mean that. Harry, say at once that it is not so, and I will promise you her forgiveness, Theodore's forgiveness, all our forgiveness for anything else. Oh, Harry, say anything but that." In answer to this Harry Clavering had nothing to say, but sat with his head resting on his arm and his face turned away from her. "Speak, Harry; if you are a man, say something. Is it so? If it be so, I believe that you will have killed her. Why do you not speak to me? Harry Clavering, tell me what is the truth."

"But why not? You can't seriously be saying you’re untrue to Florence. You can’t mean that. Harry, just say it’s not true, and I promise you her forgiveness, Theodore's forgiveness, all of our forgiveness for anything else. Oh, Harry, just say anything but that." In response, Harry Clavering had nothing to say; he sat with his head resting on his arm and his face turned away from her. "Speak, Harry; if you’re a man, say something. Is it true? If it is, I believe you’ll have destroyed her. Why won’t you talk to me? Harry Clavering, tell me what the truth is."

Then he told her all his story, not looking her once in the face, not changing his voice, suppressing his emotion till he came to the history of the present days. He described to her how he had loved Julia Brabazon, and how his love had been treated by her; how he had sworn to himself, when he knew that she had in truth become that lord's wife, that for her sake he would keep himself from loving any other woman. Then he spoke of his first days at Stratton and of his early acquaintance with Florence, and told her how different had been his second love,—how it had grown gradually and with no check to his confidence, till he felt sure that the sweet girl who was so often near him would, if he could win her, be to him a source of joy for all his life. "And so she shall," said Cecilia, with tears running down her cheeks; "she shall do so yet." And he went on with his tale, saying how pleasant it had been for him to find himself at home in Onslow Crescent, how he had joyed in calling her Cecilia, and having her infants in his arms, as though they were already partly belonging to him. And he told her how he had met the young widow at the station, having employed himself on her behalf at her sister's instance; and how cold she had been to him, offending him by her silence and sombre pride. "False woman!" exclaimed Mrs. Burton. "Oh, Cecilia, do not abuse her,—do not say a word till you know all." "I know that she is false," said Mrs. Burton, with vehement indignation. "She is not false," said Harry; "if there be falsehood, it is mine." Then he went on, and said how different she was when next he saw her. How then he understood that her solemn and haughty manner had been almost forced on her by the mode of her return, with no other friend to meet her. "She has deserved no friend," said Mrs. Burton. "You wrong her," said Harry; "you do not know her. If any woman has been ever sinned against, it is she." "But was she not false from the very first,—false, that she might become rich by marrying a man that she did not love? Will you speak up for her after that? Oh, Harry, think of it."

Then he told her his whole story, not once looking her in the eye, keeping his voice steady, holding back his emotions until he reached the present. He shared how he had loved Julia Brabazon and how she had treated that love; how he had promised himself that when he discovered she had truly become that lord's wife, he would refrain from loving any other woman for her sake. Then he talked about his first days at Stratton and his early friendship with Florence, describing how different his second love had been—how it had developed slowly and without any hindrance to his confidence, until he felt certain that the sweet girl who was often by his side would, if he could win her over, bring him joy for the rest of his life. "And so she shall," Cecilia said, tears streaming down her cheeks; "she will do so yet." He continued with his story, explaining how wonderful it had been to feel at home in Onslow Crescent, how he had enjoyed calling her Cecilia, and holding her children as if they were already partly his. He recounted meeting the young widow at the station, having acted on her sister's request, and how distant she had been towards him, upsetting him with her silence and her proud demeanor. "False woman!" exclaimed Mrs. Burton. "Oh, Cecilia, don’t criticize her—don’t say anything until you know the whole story." "I know she is false," Mrs. Burton replied passionately. "She's not false," Harry said; "if there's any falsehood here, it's mine." He then went on, describing how different she seemed when he saw her next. He realized that her serious and proud demeanor had been almost forced on her by the way she returned, with no other friend there to greet her. "She has deserved no friend," said Mrs. Burton. "You’re wrong about her," Harry countered; "you don’t know her. If anyone has been wronged, it’s her." "But wasn't she false from the very beginning—false, so she could become wealthy by marrying a man she didn’t love? Will you defend her after that? Oh, Harry, think about it."

"I will speak up for her," said Harry; and now it seemed for the first time that something of his old boldness had returned to him. "I will speak up for her, although she did as you say, because she has suffered as few women have been made to suffer, and because she has repented in ashes as few women are called on to repent." And now as he warmed with his feeling for her, he uttered his words faster and with less of shame in his voice. He described how he had gone again and again to Bolton Street, thinking no evil, till—till—till something of the old feeling had come back upon him. He meant to be true in his story, but I doubt whether he told all the truth. How could he tell it all? How could he confess that the blaze of the woman's womanhood, the flame of her beauty, and the fire engendered by her mingled rank and suffering, had singed him and burned him up, poor moth that he was? "And then at last I learned," said he, "that—that she had loved me more than I had believed."

"I will stand up for her," said Harry; and for the first time, it felt like some of his old confidence had returned. "I will stand up for her, even though she did what you say, because she has suffered more than most women have, and because she has repented deeply in a way few women ever have to." As he became more passionate about her, he spoke faster and with less shame in his voice. He talked about how he had visited Bolton Street repeatedly, thinking no ill of her, until—until—until something of his old feelings resurfaced. He intended to be honest in his account, but I doubt he revealed the whole truth. How could he lay it all bare? How could he admit that the brilliance of her femininity, the intensity of her beauty, and the combination of her status and pain had scorched him and consumed him, poor moth that he was? "And then finally I understood," he said, "that she had loved me more than I ever realized."

"And is Florence to suffer because she has postponed her love of you to her love of money?"

"And is Florence supposed to suffer because she put her love for you on hold for her love of money?"

"Mrs. Burton, if you do not understand it now, I do not know that I can tell you more. Florence alone in this matter is altogether good. Lady Ongar has been wrong, and I have been wrong. I sometimes think that Florence is too good for me."

"Mrs. Burton, if you don't get it now, I don't know if I can explain more. Florence is completely right in this situation. Lady Ongar has made mistakes, and so have I. Sometimes I feel like Florence is too good for me."

"It is for her to say that, if it be necessary."

"It’s up to her to say that, if it’s needed."

"I have told you all now, and you will know why I have not come to you."

"I've shared everything with you now, and you'll understand why I haven't come to see you."

"No, Harry; you have not told me all. Have you told that—woman that she should be your wife?" To this question he made no immediate answer, and she repeated it. "Tell me; have you told her you would marry her?"

"No, Harry; you haven't told me everything. Have you told that—woman that she should be your wife?" He didn’t respond right away, so she asked again. "Tell me; have you told her you would marry her?"

"I did tell her so."

"I told her that."

"And you will keep your word to her?" Harry, as he heard the words, was struck with awe that there should be such vehemence, such anger, in the voice of so gentle a woman as Cecilia Burton. "Answer me, sir, do you mean to marry this—countess?" But still he made no answer. "I do not wonder that you cannot speak," she said. "Oh, Florence,—oh, my darling; my lost, broken-hearted angel!" Then she turned away her face and wept.

"And you will keep your promise to her?" Harry, hearing the words, was amazed that there could be such intensity, such anger, in the voice of such a gentle woman as Cecilia Burton. "Answer me, sir, do you plan to marry this—countess?" But he still didn't respond. "I’m not surprised you can’t speak," she said. "Oh, Florence—oh, my darling; my lost, heartbroken angel!" Then she turned away her face and cried.

"Cecilia," he said, attempting to approach her with his hand, without rising from his chair.

"Cecilia," he said, trying to reach out to her with his hand without getting up from his chair.

"No, sir; when I desired you to call me so, it was because I thought you were to be a brother. I did not think that there could be a thing so weak as you. Perhaps you had better go now, lest you should meet my husband in his wrath, and he should spurn you."

"No, sir; when I asked you to call me that, it was because I thought you were going to be like a brother to me. I didn't believe there could be anyone as weak as you. Maybe it's best if you leave now, so you won't run into my husband when he's angry, or he might reject you."

But Harry Clavering still sat in his chair, motionless,—motionless, and without a word. After a while he turned his face towards her, and even in her own misery she was stricken by the wretchedness of his countenance. Suddenly she rose quickly from her chair, and coming close to him, threw herself on her knees before him. "Harry," she said, "Harry; it is not yet too late. Be our own Harry again; our dearest Harry. Say that it shall be so. What is this woman to you? What has she done for you, that for her you should throw aside such a one as our Florence? Is she noble, and good, and pure and spotless as Florence is? Will she love you with such love as Florence's? Will she believe in you as Florence believes? Yes, Harry, she believes yet. She knows nothing of this, and shall know nothing, if you will only say that you will be true. No one shall know, and I will remember it only to remember your goodness afterwards. Think of it, Harry; there can be no falseness to one who has been so false to you. Harry, you will not destroy us all at one blow?"

But Harry Clavering sat in his chair, still—completely still, and without a word. After a while, he turned his face toward her, and even in her own sadness, she was struck by the misery on his face. Suddenly, she stood up quickly from her chair and came close to him, kneeling before him. "Harry," she said, "Harry; it’s not too late yet. Be our own Harry again; our dear Harry. Just say it will be so. What is this woman to you? What has she done for you that makes you throw aside someone like our Florence? Is she as noble, good, pure, and flawless as Florence? Will she love you the way Florence does? Will she believe in you like Florence believes? Yes, Harry, she still believes. She knows nothing about this, and she'll never know if you just say that you will be true. No one will find out, and I will only remember it to appreciate your goodness later. Think about it, Harry; there can be no dishonesty to someone who has been so dishonest to you. Harry, you won't ruin us all in one go, will you?"

Never before was man so supplicated to take into his arms youth and beauty and feminine purity! And in truth he would have yielded, as indeed, what man would not have yielded,—had not Mrs. Burton been interrupted in her prayers. The step of her husband was heard upon the stairs, and she, rising from her knees, whispered quickly, "Do not tell him that it is settled. Let me tell him when you are gone."

Never before had a man been so urged to embrace youth, beauty, and feminine innocence! And honestly, he would have given in, as really, what man wouldn't have?—if Mrs. Burton hadn't been interrupted in her prayers. She heard her husband coming up the stairs and quickly whispered, "Don't tell him that it's settled. Let me tell him when you’re gone."

"You two have been a long time together," said Theodore, as he came in.

"You two have been together a long time," Theodore said as he walked in.

"Why did you leave us, then, so long?" said Mrs. Burton, trying to smile, though the signs of tears were, as she well knew, plain enough.

"Why did you leave us for so long?" Mrs. Burton asked, attempting to smile, even though it was obvious that she had been crying.

"I thought you would have sent for me."

"I thought you would have called for me."

"Burton," said Harry, "I take it kindly of you that you allowed me to see your wife alone."

"Burton," Harry said, "I really appreciate that you let me see your wife alone."

"Women always understand these things best," said he.

"Women always get this stuff best," he said.

"And you will come again to-morrow, Harry, and answer me my question?"

"And you will come back tomorrow, Harry, and answer my question?"

"Not to-morrow."

"Not tomorrow."

"Florence will be here on Monday."

"Florence will be here on Monday."

"And why should he not come when Florence is here?" asked Theodore, in an angry tone.

"And why shouldn’t he come now that Florence is here?" Theodore asked, irritated.

"Of course he will come, but I want to see him again first. Do I not, Harry?"

"Of course he will come, but I want to see him again first. Don't I, Harry?"

"I hate mysteries," said Burton.

"I hate mysteries," said Burton.

"There shall be no mystery," said his wife. "Why did you send him to me, but that there are some things difficult to discuss among three? Will you come to-morrow, Harry?"

"There won't be any secrets," said his wife. "Why did you send him to me if not because there are some things that are hard to talk about with three people? Will you come tomorrow, Harry?"

"Not to-morrow; but I will write to-morrow,—early to-morrow. I will go now, and of course you will tell Burton everything that I have said. Good night." They both took his hand, and Cecilia pressed it as she looked with beseeching eyes into his face. What would she not have done to secure the happiness of the sister whom she loved? On this occasion she had descended low that she might do much.

"Not tomorrow; but I will write tomorrow—early tomorrow. I'm going now, and of course, you’ll tell Burton everything I’ve said. Good night." They both took his hand, and Cecilia squeezed it as she looked into his face with pleading eyes. What wouldn’t she have done to ensure the happiness of the sister she loved? This time, she had humbled herself to achieve a lot.

 

 

CHAPTER XXIX.

HOW DAMON PARTED FROM PYTHIAS.

Lady Ongar, when she left Count Pateroff at the little fort on the cliff and entered by herself the gardens belonging to the hotel, had long since made up her mind that there should at last be a positive severance between herself and her devoted Sophie. For half-an-hour she had been walking in silence by the count's side; and though, of course, she had heard all that he had spoken, she had been able in that time to consider much. It must have been through Sophie that the count had heard of her journey to the Isle of Wight; and, worse than that, Sophie must, as she thought, have instigated this pursuit. In that she wronged her poor friend. Sophie had been simply paid by her brother for giving such information as enabled him to arrange this meeting. She had not even counselled him to follow Lady Ongar. But now Lady Ongar, in blind wrath, determined that Sophie should be expelled from her bosom. Lady Ongar would find this task of expulsion the less difficult in that she had come to loathe her devoted friend, and to feel it to be incumbent on her to rid herself of such devotion. Now had arrived the moment in which it might be done.

Lady Ongar, after leaving Count Pateroff at the small fort on the cliff and entering the hotel gardens alone, had long since decided that there needed to be a clear break between herself and her loyal friend Sophie. She had walked in silence beside the count for about half an hour; although she had listened to everything he said, she had also used that time to think a lot. It must have been Sophie who told the count about her trip to the Isle of Wight, and even worse, Sophie must have, as Lady Ongar believed, encouraged this pursuit. This was an unfair judgment on her poor friend. Sophie had only been compensated by her brother for providing the information that allowed him to set up this meeting. She hadn’t even suggested that he follow Lady Ongar. But now, in a blind rage, Lady Ongar was set on cutting Sophie out of her life. This task would be easier for her since she had come to despise her devoted friend and felt it was necessary to free herself from such loyalty. The time had finally come to do it.

And yet there were difficulties. Two ladies living together in an inn cannot, without much that is disagreeable, send down to the landlord saying that they want separate rooms, because they have taken it into their minds to hate each other. And there would, moreover, be something awkward in saying to Sophie that, though she was discarded, her bill should be paid—for this last and only time. No; Lady Ongar had already perceived that that would not do. She would not quarrel with Sophie after that fashion. She would leave the Isle of Wight on the following morning early, informing Sophie why she did so, and would offer money to the little Franco-Pole, presuming that it might not be agreeable to the Franco-Pole to be hurried away from her marine or rural happiness so quickly. But in doing this she would be careful to make Sophie understand that Bolton Street was to be closed against her for ever afterwards. With neither Count Pateroff nor his sister would she ever again willingly place herself in contact.

And yet there were challenges. Two women living together in an inn can't, without a lot of awkwardness, tell the landlord they want separate rooms just because they've decided to dislike each other. Plus, it would be uncomfortable to tell Sophie that, although she's no longer wanted, her bill should be covered—this one last time. No; Lady Ongar had already realized that wouldn't work. She didn’t want to fight with Sophie like that. She planned to leave the Isle of Wight early the next morning, explaining to Sophie why she was leaving, and would offer money to the little Franco-Pole, thinking that she might not appreciate being rushed away from her seaside or countryside bliss so abruptly. But in doing this, she would make sure Sophie understood that Bolton Street would be closed off to her forever. She would never again willingly come into contact with either Count Pateroff or his sister.

It was dark as she entered the house,—the walk out, her delay there, and her return having together occupied her three hours. She had hardly felt the dusk growing on her as she progressed steadily on her way, with that odious man beside her. She had been thinking of other things, and her eyes had accustomed themselves gradually to the fading twilight. But now, when she saw the glimmer of the lamps from the inn-windows, she knew that the night had come upon her, and she began to fear that she had been imprudent in allowing herself to be out so late,—imprudent, even had she succeeded in being alone. She went direct to her own room, that, woman-like, she might consult her own face as to the effects of the insult she had received, and then having, as it were, steadied herself, and prepared herself for the scene that was to follow, she descended to the sitting-room and encountered her friend. The friend was the first to speak; and the reader will kindly remember that the friend had ample reason for knowing what companion Lady Ongar had been likely to meet upon the downs.

It was dark when she entered the house; the walk out, her delay there, and her return had taken her three hours. She hardly noticed the dusk settling in as she made her way steadily forward with that unpleasant man by her side. She had been distracted by other thoughts, and her eyes adjusted gradually to the fading light. But now, seeing the glow of the lamps from the inn windows, she realized that night had fallen, and she began to worry that it was unwise to be out so late—unwise, even if she had managed to be alone. She went straight to her room to check her reflection for any signs of the insult she had suffered. Once she composed herself and mentally prepared for what was to come, she went down to the sitting room and met her friend. Her friend spoke first, and it's important to remember that she had good reason to know what kind of company Lady Ongar was likely to encounter on the downs.

"Julie, dear, how late you are," said Sophie, as though she were rather irritated in having been kept so long waiting for her tea.

"Julie, sweetheart, you’re quite late," Sophie said, sounding a bit annoyed at having to wait so long for her tea.

"I am late," said Lady Ongar.

"I'm late," said Lady Ongar.

"And don't you think you are imprudent,—all alone, you know, dear; just a leetle imprudent."

"And don't you think you're being a bit careless—being all alone, you know, dear; just a little careless."

"Very imprudent, indeed. I have been thinking of that now as I crossed the lawn, and found how dark it was. I have been very imprudent; but I have escaped without much injury."

"Very reckless, indeed. I've been thinking about that as I crossed the lawn and noticed how dark it was. I've been quite careless; but I've come away without too much harm."

"Escaped! escaped what? Have you escaped a cold, or a drunken man?"

"Escaped! Escaped from what? Did you get away from a cold or a drunk guy?"

"Both, as I think." Then she sat down, and, having rung the bell, she ordered tea.

"Both, I think." Then she sat down, rang the bell, and ordered tea.

"There seems to be something very odd with you," said Sophie. "I do not quite understand you."

"There’s definitely something strange about you," Sophie said. "I don’t really get you."

"When did you see your brother last?" Lady Ongar asked.

"When did you last see your brother?" Lady Ongar asked.

"My brother?"

"My bro?"

"Yes, Count Pateroff. When did you see him last?"

"Yes, Count Pateroff. When was the last time you saw him?"

"Why do you want to know?"

"Why do you even care?"

"Well, it does not signify, as of course you will not tell me. But will you say when you will see him next?"

"Well, it doesn't matter, since you obviously won't tell me. But will you say when you'll see him next?"

"How can I tell?"

"How can I know?"

"Will it be to-night?"

"Will it be tonight?"

"Julie, what do you mean?"

"Julie, what do you mean?"

"Only this, that I wish you would make him understand that if he has anything to do concerning me, he might as well do it out of hand. For the last hour—"

"Only this: I hope you can help him realize that if he needs to deal with me, he should just do it right away. For the last hour—

"Then you have seen him?"

"Have you seen him?"

"Yes; is not that wonderful? I have seen him."

"Yes, isn't that amazing? I've seen him."

"And why could you not tell him yourself what you had to say? He and I do not agree about certain things, and I do not like to carry messages to him. And you have seen him here on this sacré sea-coast?"

"And why couldn't you just tell him what you needed to say yourself? He and I have some differences, and I really don’t like delivering messages to him. And have you seen him here on this sacred coastline?"

"Exactly so; on this sacré sea-coast. Is it not odd that he should have known that I was here,—known the very inn we were at,—and known, too, whither I was going to-night?"

"Exactly; on this sacred coastline. Isn't it strange that he knew I was here—knew the exact inn we were staying at—and even knew where I was going tonight?"

"He would learn that from the servants, my dear."

"He would find that out from the staff, my dear."

"No doubt. He has been good enough to amuse me with mysterious threats as to what he would do to punish me if I would not—"

"No doubt. He has taken the time to entertain me with vague threats about what he would do to punish me if I would not—"

"Become his wife?" suggested Sophie.

"Be his wife?" suggested Sophie.

"Exactly. It was very flattering on his part. I certainly do not intend to become his wife."

"Exactly. That was really flattering of him. I definitely don't intend to become his wife."

"Ah, you like better that young Clavering who has the other sweetheart. He is younger. That is true."

"Ah, you prefer that younger Clavering who has the other girlfriend. That's true."

"Upon my word, yes. I like my cousin, Harry Clavering, much better than I like your brother; but, as I take it, that has not much to do with it. I was speaking of your brother's threats. I do not understand them; but I wish he could be made to understand that if he has anything to do, he had better go and do it. As for marriage, I would sooner marry the first ploughboy I could find in the fields."

"Honestly, yes. I like my cousin, Harry Clavering, a lot more than I like your brother; but honestly, that doesn’t really matter. I was talking about your brother’s threats. I don’t get them, but I wish someone could make him understand that if he has something to do, he should just go and do it. As for marriage, I’d rather marry the first farmhand I could find in the fields."

"Julie,—you need not insult him."

"Julie, don't insult him."

"I will have no more of your Julie; and I will have no more of you." As she said this she rose from her chair, and walked about the room. "You have betrayed me, and there shall be an end of it."

"I won’t tolerate your Julie anymore; and I won’t tolerate you anymore." As she said this, she got up from her chair and walked around the room. "You've betrayed me, and this needs to stop."

How Damon parted from Pythias.
How Damon said goodbye to Pythias.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"Betrayed you! what nonsense you talk. In what have I betrayed you?"

"Betrayed you! What nonsense you're saying. How have I betrayed you?"

"You set him upon my track here, though you knew I desired to avoid him."

"You put him on my trail here, even though you knew I wanted to stay away from him."

"And is that all? I was coming here to this detestable island, and I told my brother. That is my offence,—and then you talk of betraying! Julie, you sometimes are a goose."

"And is that it? I came to this awful island, and I told my brother. That's my crime — and then you talk about betrayal! Julie, you can be such a fool sometimes."

"Very often, no doubt; but, Madame Gordeloup, if you please we will be geese apart for the future."

"Very often, no doubt; but, Madame Gordeloup, if you don’t mind, we will be geese apart from now on."

"Oh, certainly;—if you wish it."

"Oh, sure;—if you want."

"I do wish it."

"I really wish for it."

"It cannot hurt me. I can choose my friends anywhere. The world is open to me to go where I please into society. I am not at a loss."

"It can't hurt me. I can make friends anywhere. The world is open to me to go wherever I want in society. I'm not lost."

All this Lady Ongar well understood, but she could bear it without injury to her temper. Such revenge was to be expected from such a woman. "I do not want you to be at a loss," she said. "I only want you to understand that after what has this evening occurred between your brother and me, our acquaintance had better cease."

All this Lady Ongar completely understood, but she could handle it without losing her temper. Such revenge was to be expected from someone like her. "I don’t want you to be confused," she said. "I just want you to realize that after what happened tonight between your brother and me, it’s best if we stop seeing each other."

"And I am to be punished for my brother?"

"And I’m going to be punished for my brother?"

"You said just now that it would be no punishment, and I was glad to hear it. Society is, as you say, open to you, and you will lose nothing."

"You just said it wouldn’t be a punishment, and I was happy to hear that. Society is, as you mentioned, open to you, and you won’t lose anything."

"Of course society is open to me. Have I committed myself? I am not talked about for my lovers by all the town. Why should I be at a loss? No."

"Of course society accepts me. Have I made a commitment? I’m not the talk of the town because of my lovers. Why should I feel uncertain? No."

"I shall return to London to-morrow by the earliest opportunity. I have already told them so, and have ordered a carriage to go to Yarmouth at eight."

"I will return to London tomorrow at the earliest chance. I've already informed them and arranged for a carriage to go to Yarmouth at eight."

"And you leave me here, alone!"

"And you leave me here, all by myself!"

"Your brother is here, Madame Gordeloup."

"Your brother is here, Mrs. Gordeloup."

"My brother is nothing to me. You know well that. He can come and he can go when he please. I come here to follow you,—to be companion to you, to oblige you,—and now you say you go and leave me in this detestable barrack. If I am here alone, I will be revenged."

"My brother means nothing to me. You know that well. He can come and go as he pleases. I'm here to follow you—to be your companion and to help you—and now you say you're leaving me in this horrible place. If I’m all alone here, I will get my revenge."

"You shall go back with me if you wish it."

"You can come back with me if you want to."

"At eight o'clock in the morning,—and see, it is now eleven; while you have been wandering about alone with my brother in the dark! No; I will not go so early morning as that. To-morrow is Saturday—you was to remain till Tuesday."

"At eight o'clock in the morning—and look, it’s now eleven; while you’ve been wandering around alone with my brother in the dark! No; I won’t leave that early in the morning. Tomorrow is Saturday—you were supposed to stay until Tuesday."

"You may do as you please. I shall go at eight to-morrow."

"You can do whatever you want. I’ll leave at eight tomorrow."

"Very well. You go at eight, very well. And who will pay for the 'beels' when you are gone, Lady Ongar?"

"Alright. You leave at eight, got it. And who will cover the 'beels' when you're gone, Lady Ongar?"

"I have already ordered the bill up to-morrow morning. If you will allow me to offer you twenty pounds, that will bring you to London when you please to follow."

"I’ve already arranged for the bill by tomorrow morning. If you let me give you twenty pounds, that will get you to London whenever you want to go."

"Twenty pounds! What is twenty pounds? No; I will not have your twenty pounds." And she pushed away from her the two notes which Lady Ongar had already put upon the table. "Who is to pay me for the loss of all my time? Tell me that. I have devoted myself to you. Who will pay me for that?"

"Twenty pounds! What is twenty pounds? No; I don’t want your twenty pounds." She pushed away the two bills that Lady Ongar had already placed on the table. "Who’s going to compensate me for all the time I’ve wasted? Tell me that. I’ve dedicated myself to you. Who will pay me for that?"

"Not I, certainly, Madame Gordeloup."

"Not me, definitely, Madame Gordeloup."

"Not you! You will not pay me for my time;—for a whole year I have been devoted to you! You will not pay me, and you send me away in this way? By Gar, you will be made to pay,—through the nose."

"Not you! You won’t pay me for my time; I’ve been dedicated to you for a whole year! You won’t pay me, and you’re sending me away like this? By God, you will pay—big time."

As the interview was becoming unpleasant, Lady Ongar took her candle and went away to bed, leaving the twenty pounds on the table. As she left the room she knew that the money was there, but she could not bring herself to pick it up and restore it to her pocket. It was improbable, she thought, that Madame Gordeloup would leave it to the mercy of the waiters; and the chances were that the notes would go into the pocket for which they were intended.

As the interview was getting uncomfortable, Lady Ongar grabbed her candle and headed off to bed, leaving the twenty pounds on the table. As she exited the room, she recognized the money was there, but she couldn’t bring herself to pick it up and put it back in her pocket. She thought it was unlikely that Madame Gordeloup would leave it to the discretion of the waiters; the chances were that the money would end up in the intended pocket.

And such was the result. Sophie, when she was left alone, got up from her seat, and stood for some moments on the rug, making her calculations. That Lady Ongar should be very angry about Count Pateroff's presence Sophie had expected; but she had not expected that her friend's anger would be carried to such extremity that she would pronounce a sentence of banishment for life. But, perhaps, after all, it might be well for Sophie herself that such sentence should be carried out. This fool of a woman with her income, her park, and her rank, was going to give herself,—so said Sophie to herself,—to a young, handsome, proud pig of a fellow,—so Sophie called him,—who had already shown himself to be Sophie's enemy, and who would certainly find no place for Sophie Gordeloup within his house. Might it not be well that the quarrel should be consummated now,—such compensation being obtained as might possibly be extracted. Sophie certainly knew a good deal, which it might be for the convenience of the future husband to keep dark—or convenient for the future wife that the future husband should not know. Terms might be yet had, although Lady Ongar had refused to pay anything beyond that trumpery twenty pounds. Terms might be had; or, indeed, it might be that Lady Ongar herself, when her anger was over, might sue for a reconciliation. Or Sophie,—and this idea occurred as Sophie herself became a little despondent after long calculation,—Sophie herself might acknowledge herself to be wrong, begging pardon, and weeping on her friend's neck. Perhaps it might be worth while to make some further calculation in bed. Then Sophie, softly drawing the notes towards her as a cat might have done, and hiding them somewhere about her person, also went to her room.

And that’s what happened. After being left alone, Sophie got up from her seat and stood on the rug for a few moments, doing some calculations. She had anticipated that Lady Ongar would be very upset about Count Pateroff being there; however, she didn’t expect her friend’s anger to reach the point of saying she would be banished for life. But maybe, in the end, it would actually be better for Sophie if that sentence were enforced. This foolish woman with her income, her estate, and her status was planning to give herself—to use Sophie’s words—to a young, handsome, proud jerk— as Sophie called him—who had already proven to be an enemy to her and would definitely not welcome Sophie Gordeloup into his home. Wouldn’t it be better for the conflict to be resolved now, possibly extracting some compensation? Sophie certainly knew a lot that it might be convenient for the future husband to keep hidden—or that the future wife might not want the future husband to know. There could still be terms negotiated, even though Lady Ongar had already refused to pay anything beyond that measly twenty pounds. There could be terms; or, perhaps, once her anger cooled, Lady Ongar might even seek a reconciliation. Or Sophie—this idea occurred to her as she began to feel a bit down after her lengthy thoughts—could admit she was wrong, apologize, and cry on her friend’s shoulder. Maybe it was worth doing some more calculations in bed. Then Sophie, quietly pulling the notes toward her like a cat, hiding them somewhere on her person, headed to her room.

In the morning Lady Ongar prepared herself for starting at eight o'clock, and, as a part of that preparation, had her breakfast brought to her upstairs. When the time was up, she descended to the sitting-room on the way to the carriage, and there she found Sophie also prepared for a journey.

In the morning, Lady Ongar got ready to leave at eight o'clock, and as part of that, she had her breakfast brought up to her room. When the time came, she went down to the sitting room on her way to the carriage, where she found Sophie also ready for the trip.

"I am going too. You will let me go?" said Sophie.

"I’m going too. You’ll let me go?" said Sophie.

"Certainly," said Lady Ongar. "I proposed to you to do so yesterday."

"Of course," said Lady Ongar. "I suggested that you do it yesterday."

"You should not be so hard upon your poor friend," said Sophie. This was said in the hearing of Lady Ongar's maid and of two waiters, and Lady Ongar made no reply to it. When they were in the carriage together, the maid being then stowed away in a dickey or rumble behind, Sophie again whined and was repentant. "Julie, you should not be so hard upon your poor Sophie."

"You shouldn't be so tough on your poor friend," Sophie said. This was said in front of Lady Ongar's maid and two waiters, and Lady Ongar didn’t respond. When they were in the carriage together, with the maid tucked away in the back, Sophie once again complained and felt sorry for herself. "Julie, you shouldn't be so tough on your poor Sophie."

"It seems to me that the hardest things said were spoken by you."

"It seems to me that the toughest things said came from you."

"Then I will beg your pardon. I am impulsive. I do not restrain myself. When I am angry I say I know not what. If I said any words that were wrong, I will apologize, and beg to be forgiven,—there,—on my knees." And, as she spoke, the adroit little woman contrived to get herself down upon her knees on the floor of the carriage. "There; say that I am forgiven; say that Sophie is pardoned." The little woman had calculated that even should her Julie pardon her, Julie would hardly condescend to ask for the two ten-pound notes.

"Then I’ll ask for your forgiveness. I am impulsive. I don’t hold back. When I’m angry, I say things I don’t mean. If I said anything wrong, I’m sorry and I ask to be forgiven—there—on my knees." And as she spoke, the clever little woman managed to get down on her knees on the floor of the carriage. "There; say that I’m forgiven; say that Sophie is pardoned." The little woman figured that even if Julie forgave her, Julie would probably not stoop to ask for the two hundred-pound notes.

But Lady Ongar had stoutly determined that there should be no further intimacy, and had reflected that a better occasion for a quarrel could hardly be vouchsafed to her than that afforded by Sophie's treachery in bringing her brother down to Freshwater. She was too strong, and too much mistress of her will, to be cheated now out of her advantage. "Madame Gordeloup, that attitude is absurd;—I beg you will get up."

But Lady Ongar had firmly decided that there would be no more closeness, and she realized that there could hardly be a better reason for a fight than Sophie's betrayal in bringing her brother to Freshwater. She was too strong and too much in control of her will to be fooled out of her advantage now. "Madame Gordeloup, that position is ridiculous;—please get up."

"Never; never till you have pardoned me." And Sophie crouched still lower, till she was all among the dressing-cases and little bags at the bottom of the carriage. "I will not get up till you say the words, 'Sophie, dear, I forgive you.'"

"Never; never until you’ve forgiven me.” And Sophie crouched even lower, until she was completely hidden among the dressing cases and little bags at the bottom of the carriage. “I won’t get up until you say the words, ‘Sophie, dear, I forgive you.’”

"Then I fear you will have an uncomfortable drive. Luckily it will be very short. It is only half-an-hour to Yarmouth."

"Then I’m afraid you’ll have an uncomfortable drive. Thankfully, it’s very short. It’s only half an hour to Yarmouth."

"And I will kneel again on board the packet; and on the—what you call, platform,—and in the railway carriage,—and in the street. I will kneel to my Julie everywhere, till she say, 'Sophie, dear, I forgive you!'"

"And I will kneel again on the boat; and on the—what you call, platform,—and in the train carriage,—and in the street. I will kneel to my Julie everywhere, until she says, 'Sophie, dear, I forgive you!'"

"Madame Gordeloup, pray understand me; between you and me there shall be no further intimacy."

"Madame Gordeloup, please understand me; there won't be any more closeness between us."

"No!"

"No way!"

"Certainly not. No further explanation is necessary, but our intimacy has certainly come to an end."

"Definitely not. There's no need for more explanation, but our closeness has definitely come to an end."

"It has."

"It does."

"Undoubtedly."

"Definitely."

"Julie!"

"Julie!"

"That is such nonsense. Madame Gordeloup, you are disgracing yourself by your proceedings."

"That's just nonsense. Madame Gordeloup, you're embarrassing yourself with your actions."

"Oh! disgracing myself, am I?" In saying this, Sophie picked herself up from among the dressing-cases, and recovered her seat. "I am disgracing myself! Well, I know very well whose disgrace is the most talked about in the world, yours or mine. Disgracing myself;—and from you? What did your husband say of you himself?"

"Oh! Am I embarrassing myself?" With that, Sophie got up from among the dressing cases and sat back down. "I'm embarrassing myself! Well, I know very well whose disgrace is more talked about in the world, yours or mine. Embarrassing myself;—and coming from you? What did your husband say about you himself?"

Lady Ongar began to feel that even a very short journey might be too long. Sophie was now quite up, and was wriggling herself on her seat, adjusting her clothes which her late attitude had disarranged, not in the most graceful manner.

Lady Ongar started to feel that even a short trip might be too long. Sophie was now fully awake and was fidgeting in her seat, adjusting her clothes that her previous position had messed up, though not in the most graceful way.

"You shall see," she continued. "Yes, you shall see. Tell me of disgrace! I have only disgraced myself by being with you. Ah,—very well. Yes; I will get out. As for being quiet, I shall be quiet whenever I like it. I know when to talk and when to hold my tongue. Disgrace!" So saying, she stepped out of the carriage, leaning on the arm of a boatman who had come to the door, and who had heard her last words.

"You'll see," she went on. "Yes, you will see. Talk about disgrace! The only disgrace I have is being with you. Ah, fine. Yes; I’ll get out. As for being quiet, I’ll be quiet whenever I want. I know when to speak and when to be silent. Disgrace!" With that, she got out of the carriage, leaning on the arm of a boatman who had come to the door and had heard her last words.

It may be imagined that all this did not contribute much to the comfort of Lady Ongar. They were now on the little pier at Yarmouth, and in five minutes every one there knew who she was, and knew also that there had been some disagreement between her and the little foreigner. The eyes of the boatmen, and of the drivers, and of the other travellers, and of the natives going over to the market at Lymington, were all on her, and the eyes also of all the idlers of Yarmouth who had congregated there to watch the despatch of the early boat. But she bore it well, seating herself, with her maid beside her, on one of the benches on the deck, and waiting there with patience till the boat should start. Sophie once or twice muttered the word "disgrace!" but beyond that she remained silent.

It can be imagined that all this didn’t do much to help Lady Ongar feel comfortable. They were now on the small pier at Yarmouth, and within five minutes, everyone there recognized her and also knew that there had been some kind of disagreement between her and the little foreigner. The eyes of the boatmen, drivers, other travelers, and locals heading to the market in Lymington were all on her, as were those of all the onlookers in Yarmouth who had gathered to watch the early boat leave. But she managed well, sitting with her maid beside her on one of the deck benches, patiently waiting for the boat to depart. Sophie muttered the word "disgrace!" once or twice, but aside from that, she stayed quiet.

They crossed over the little channel without a word, and without a word made their way up to the railway-station. Lady Ongar had been too confused to get tickets for their journey at Yarmouth, but had paid on board the boat for the passage of the three persons—herself, her maid, and Sophie. But, at the station at Lymington, the more important business of taking tickets for the journey to London became necessary. Lady Ongar had thought of this on her journey across the water, and, when at the railway-station, gave her purse to her maid, whispering her orders. The girl took three first-class tickets, and then going gently up to Madame Gordeloup, offered one to that lady. "Ah, yes; very well; I understand," said Sophie, taking the ticket. "I shall take this;" and she held the ticket up in her hand, as though she had some specially mysterious purpose in accepting it.

They crossed the small channel in silence and quietly made their way to the train station. Lady Ongar had been too flustered to buy tickets for their journey at Yarmouth but had paid for the passage of the three of them—herself, her maid, and Sophie—on board the boat. However, at the Lymington station, it became important to purchase tickets for the trip to London. Lady Ongar had thought about this during their crossing, and when they arrived at the railway station, she handed her purse to her maid, whispering her instructions. The maid obtained three first-class tickets and then approached Madame Gordeloup, offering her one. "Ah, yes; very well; I understand," said Sophie, taking the ticket. "I shall take this;" and she held the ticket up in her hand as if she had some particular, mysterious reason for accepting it.

She got into the same carriage with Lady Ongar and her maid, but spoke no word on her journey up to London. At Basingstoke she had a glass of sherry, for which Lady Ongar's maid paid. Lady Ongar had telegraphed for her carriage, which was waiting for her, but Sophie betook herself to a cab. "Shall I pay the cabman, ma'am?" said the maid. "Yes," said Sophie, "or stop. It will be half-a-crown. You had better give me the half-crown." The maid did so, and in this way the careful Sophie added another shilling to her store,—over and above the twenty pounds,—knowing well that the fare to Mount Street was eighteen-pence.

She shared a carriage with Lady Ongar and her maid but didn’t say a word during their trip to London. At Basingstoke, she had a glass of sherry, which Lady Ongar's maid paid for. Lady Ongar had sent a telegram for her carriage, which was waiting for her, but Sophie decided to take a cab instead. "Should I pay the cab driver, ma'am?" asked the maid. "Yes," Sophie replied, "or just wait. It will be half a crown. You might as well give me the half crown." The maid did this, and in this way, the careful Sophie added another shilling to her savings—on top of the twenty pounds—knowing that the fare to Mount Street was eighteen pence.

 

 

CHAPTER XXX.

DOODLES IN MOUNT STREET.

Captain Clavering and Captain Boodle had, as may be imagined, discussed at great length and with much frequency the results of the former captain's negotiations with the Russian spy, and it had been declared strongly by the latter captain, and ultimately admitted by the former, that those results were not satisfactory. Seventy pounds had been expended, and, so to say, nothing had been accomplished. It was in vain that Archie, unwilling to have it thought that he had been worsted in diplomacy, argued that with these political personages, and especially with Russian political personages, the ambages were everything,—that the preliminaries were in fact the whole, and that when they were arranged, the thing was done. Doodles proved to demonstration that the thing was not done, and that seventy pounds was too much for mere preliminaries. "My dear fellow," he said, speaking I fear with some scorn in his voice, "where are you? That's what I want to know. Where are you? Just nowhere." This was true. All that Archie had received from Madame Gordeloup in return for his last payment, was an intimation that no immediate day could be at present named for a renewal of his personal attack upon the countess; but that a day might be named when he should next come to Mount Street,—provision, of course, being made that he should come with a due qualification under his glove. Now the original basis on which Archie was to carry on his suit had been arranged to be this,—that Lady Ongar should be made to know that he was there; and the way in which Doodles had illustrated this precept by the artistic and allegorical use of his heel was still fresh in Archie's memory. The meeting in which they had come to that satisfactory understanding had taken place early in the spring, and now June was coming on, and the countess certainly did not as yet know that her suitor was there! If anything was to be done by the Russian spy it should be done quickly, and Doodles did not refrain from expressing his opinion that his friend was "putting his foot into it," and "making a mull of the whole thing." Now Archie Clavering was a man not eaten up by the vice of self-confidence, but prone rather to lean upon his friends and anxious for the aid of counsel in difficulty.

Captain Clavering and Captain Boodle had, as you might expect, talked a lot and quite often about the results of the former captain's dealings with the Russian spy, and it was firmly stated by the latter captain, ultimately acknowledged by the former, that those results were disappointing. Seventy pounds had been spent, and, in a sense, nothing had come of it. Archie, eager to avoid looking like he had lost in diplomacy, argued that with these political figures, especially Russian ones, the preliminaries were everything—that arranging them essentially meant the deal was done. Doodles demonstrated that the deal was far from done, and that seventy pounds was way too high a price for mere preliminaries. "My dear fellow," he said, I fear with a bit of scorn in his voice, "where are you? That's what I want to know. Where are you? Just nowhere." This was accurate. All that Archie had gotten from Madame Gordeloup in exchange for his last payment was a hint that no immediate date could be set for renewing his personal pursuit of the countess; however, a day might be arranged for when he next visited Mount Street—provided, of course, that he arrived with the right credentials. The original plan for Archie to proceed with his courtship was that Lady Ongar should be made aware of his presence; and the way Doodles had illustrated this concept using his heel was still fresh in Archie's mind. Their meeting where they came to this satisfying understanding had happened early in the spring, and now June was approaching, and the countess certainly didn’t yet know that her suitor was here! If something was going to happen with the Russian spy, it should be done quickly, and Doodles did not hold back from saying that his friend was "putting his foot in it" and "messing up the whole thing." Now Archie Clavering was not a man consumed by self-confidence; rather, he tended to rely on his friends and was eager for their advice during tough times.

"What the devil is a fellow to do?" he asked. "Perhaps I had better give it all up. Everybody says that she is as proud as Lucifer; and, after all, nobody knows what rigs she has been up to."

"What on earth is a guy supposed to do?" he asked. "Maybe I should just give it all up. Everyone says she's as proud as can be; and, after all, no one knows what trouble she's been causing."

But this was by no means the view which Doodles was inclined to take. He was a man who in the field never gave up a race because he was thrown out at the start, having perceived that patience would achieve as much, perhaps, as impetuosity. He had ridden many a waiting race, and had won some of them. He was never so sure of his hand at billiards as when the score was strong against him. "Always fight whilst there's any fight left in you," was a maxim with him. He never surrendered a bet as lost, till the evidence as to the facts was quite conclusive, and had taught himself to regard any chance, be it ever so remote, as a kind of property.

But this was definitely not the perspective that Doodles had. He was a man who never gave up on a race in the field just because he was thrown out at the start; he understood that patience could be just as effective as impulsiveness. He had run many races where he had to wait and had even won some of them. He was never more confident in his billiards skills than when the score was heavily against him. "Always keep fighting as long as there's any fight left in you," was one of his guiding principles. He never accepted a bet as lost until the evidence was completely clear, and he had trained himself to see any chance, no matter how slim, as a kind of asset.

"Never say die," was his answer to Archie's remark. "You see, Clavvy, you have still a few good cards, and you can never know what a woman really means till you have popped yourself. As to what she did when she was away, and all that, you see when a woman has got seven thousand a year in her own right, it covers a multitude of sins."

"Never give up," was his reply to Archie's comment. "You see, Clavvy, you still have a few good cards left, and you'll never truly understand what a woman means until you've put yourself out there. As for what she did while she was away and all that, when a woman has seven thousand a year of her own, it really makes a lot of issues seem minor."

"Of course, I know that."

"Obviously, I get that."

"And why should a fellow be uncharitable? If a man is to believe all that he hears, by George, they're all much of a muchness. For my part I never believe anything. I always suppose every horse will run to win; and though there may be a cross now and again, that's the surest line to go upon. D'you understand me now?" Archie said that of course he understood him; but I fancy that Doodles had gone a little too deep for Archie's intellect.

"And why should someone be unkind? If a person believes everything they hear, honestly, everyone is pretty much the same. As for me, I never take anything at face value. I always think every horse is going to win; and while there might be an upset here and there, that's the best approach to take. Do you get what I mean now?" Archie said that of course he understood, but I think Doodles might have been a bit too complicated for Archie's understanding.

"I should say, drop this woman, and go at the widow yourself at once."

"I suggest you forget about this woman and go straight for the widow yourself."

"And lose all my seventy pounds for nothing!"

"And lose all my seventy pounds for nothing!"

"You're not soft enough to suppose that you'll ever get it back again, I hope?" Archie assured his friend that he was not soft enough for any such hope as that, and then the two remained silent for a while, deeply considering the posture of the affair. "I'll tell you what I'll do for you," said Doodles; "and upon my word I think it will be the best thing."

"You're not naive enough to think you'll ever get it back, right?" Archie assured his friend that he wasn't naive enough to have any hope like that, and then they both fell silent for a bit, deeply contemplating the situation. "I'll tell you what I'll do for you," said Doodles; "and honestly, I think it will be the best thing."

"And what's that?"

"And what’s that?"

"I'll go to this woman myself."

"I'll go see this woman myself."

"What; to Lady Ongar?"

"What; to Lady Ongar?"

"No; but to the Spy, as you call her. Principals are never the best for this kind of work. When a man has to pay the money himself he can never make so good a bargain as another can make for him. That stands to reason. And I can be blunter with her about it than you can;—can go straight at it, you know; and you may be sure of this, she won't get any money from me, unless I get the marbles for it."

"No, but to the Spy, as you call her. Main characters are never the best for this kind of thing. When a guy has to pay the money himself, he can never get as good a deal as someone else can get for him. That makes sense. And I can be more straightforward with her about it than you can; I can go straight to the point, you know; and you can be sure of this, she won't get any money from me unless I get the marbles for it."

"You'll take some with you, then?"

"You'll take some with you, right?"

"Well, yes; that is, if it's convenient. We were talking of going two or three hundred pounds, you know, and you've only gone seventy as yet. Suppose you hand me over the odd thirty. If she gets it out of me easy, tell me my name isn't Boodle."

"Sure, if it works for you. We were planning on going for two or three hundred pounds, and you've only put in seventy so far. How about you give me the extra thirty? If she manages to get it out of me without a hassle, then call me Boodle."

There was much in this that was distasteful to Captain Clavering, but at last he submitted, and handed over the thirty pounds to his friend. Then there was considerable doubt whether the ambassador should announce himself by a note, but it was decided at last that his arrival should not be expected. If he did not find the lady at home or disengaged on the first visit, or on the second, he might on the third or the fourth. He was a persistent, patient little man, and assured his friend that he would certainly see Madame Gordeloup before a week had passed over their heads.

There was a lot in this that bothered Captain Clavering, but eventually, he gave in and handed over the thirty pounds to his friend. There was quite a bit of uncertainty over whether the ambassador should introduce himself with a note, but it was finally decided that his arrival wouldn’t be expected. If he didn’t find the lady at home or available on the first visit, or the second, he might on the third or the fourth. He was a determined, patient little man and assured his friend that he would definitely see Madame Gordeloup before a week had gone by.

On the occasion of his first visit to Mount Street, Sophie Gordeloup was enjoying her retreat in the Isle of Wight. When he called the second time she was in bed, the fatigue of her journey on the previous day,—the day on which she had actually risen at seven o'clock in the morning,—having oppressed her much. She had returned in the cab alone, and had occupied herself much on the same evening. Now that she was to be parted from her Julie, it was needful that she should be occupied. She wrote a long letter to her brother,—much more confidential than her letters to him had lately been,—telling him how much she had suffered on his behalf, and describing to him with great energy the perverseness, malignity, and general pigheadedness of her late friend. Then she wrote an anonymous letter to Mrs. Burton, whose name and address she had learned, after having ascertained from Archie the fact of Harry Clavering's engagement. In this letter she described the wretched wiles by which that horrid woman Lady Ongar was struggling to keep Harry and Miss Burton apart. "It is very bad, but it is true," said the diligent little woman. "She has been seen in his embrace; I know it." After that she dressed and went out into society,—the society of which she had boasted as being open to her,—to the house of some hanger-on of some embassy, and listened, and whispered, and laughed when some old sinner joked with her, and talked poetry to a young man who was foolish and lame, but who had some money, and got a glass of wine and a cake for nothing, and so was very busy; and on her return home calculated that her cab-hire for the evening had been judiciously spent. But her diligence had been so great that when Captain Boodle called the next morning at twelve o'clock she was still in bed. Had she been in dear Paris, or in dearer Vienna, that would have not hindered her from receiving the visit; but in pigheaded London this could not be done; and, therefore, when she had duly scrutinized Captain Boodle's card, and had learned from the servant that Captain Boodle desired to see herself on very particular business, she made an appointment with him for the following day.

On her first visit to Mount Street, Sophie Gordeloup was enjoying her getaway in the Isle of Wight. When he called the second time, she was still in bed because she was exhausted from her journey the day before, when she had actually gotten up at seven in the morning. She had come back alone in a cab and had kept herself busy that evening. Now that she was about to be separated from her Julie, it was important for her to stay occupied. She wrote a long letter to her brother—much more personal than her recent letters—telling him how much she had suffered for him, and vividly describing the stubbornness, malice, and general obstinacy of her former friend. Then she wrote an anonymous letter to Mrs. Burton, whose name and address she had found out after confirming with Archie that Harry Clavering was engaged. In this letter, she detailed the terrible schemes that the awful Lady Ongar was using to keep Harry and Miss Burton apart. "It's really bad, but it's true," said the hardworking little woman. "She’s been seen in his embrace; I know it." After that, she got dressed and went out into the social scene she had bragged about being part of—to the house of some affiliate of an embassy—where she listened, whispered, and laughed when some older guy joked with her, talked poetry to a young man who was foolish and lame but had some money, and scored a glass of wine and a cake for free, so she was very busy; on her way home, she calculated that her cab fare for the evening was well spent. However, she had been so diligent that when Captain Boodle arrived the next morning at twelve o'clock, she was still in bed. Had she been in lovely Paris or even lovelier Vienna, it wouldn’t have stopped her from receiving visitors, but in stuffy London, that was not acceptable; so, after carefully examining Captain Boodle’s card and learning from the servant that he wanted to see her about something very specific, she made an appointment to meet him the next day.

On the following day at the same hour Doodles came and was shown up into her room. He had scrupulously avoided any smartness of apparel, calculating that a Newmarket costume would be, of all dresses, the most efficacious in filling her with an idea of his smartness; whereas Archie had probably injured himself much by his polished leather boots, and general newness of clothing. Doodles, therefore, wore a cut-away coat, a coloured shirt with a fogle round his neck, old brown trowsers that fitted very tightly round his legs, and was careful to take no gloves with him. He was a man with a small bullet head, who wore his hair cut very short, and had no other beard than a slight appendage on his lower chin. He certainly did possess a considerable look of smartness, and when he would knit his brows and nod his head, some men were apt to think that it was not easy to get on the soft side of him.

The next day at the same time, Doodles arrived and was shown into her room. He had carefully chosen not to dress too fancy, figuring that a Newmarket outfit would be the best way to give her an impression of his style, while Archie probably hurt his chances with his shiny leather boots and brand-new clothes. Doodles, then, wore a cutaway coat, a colorful shirt with a scarf tied around his neck, old brown trousers that were very snug around his legs, and made sure not to wear any gloves. He was a guy with a small bullet-shaped head, cropped hair, and just a little scruff on his chin. He definitely had a certain air of stylishness, and when he frowned and nodded, some guys thought it would be tough to win him over.

Sophie on this occasion was not arrayed with that becoming negligence which had graced her appearance when Captain Clavering had called. She knew that a visitor was coming, and the questionably white wrapper had been exchanged for an ordinary dress. This was regretted, rather than otherwise, by Captain Boodle, who had received from Archie a description of the lady's appearance, and who had been anxious to see the Spy in her proper and peculiar habiliments. It must be remembered that Sophie knew nothing of her present visitor, and was altogether unaware that he was in any way connected with Captain Clavering.

Sophie, this time, wasn’t dressed with the casual elegance that had charmed Captain Clavering when he visited. She knew someone was coming, so she swapped her somewhat tattered white robe for a regular dress. Captain Boodle regretted this change, as Archie had told him about the lady’s appearance and he was eager to see the Spy in her unique outfit. It’s important to note that Sophie had no idea who her current visitor was and had no knowledge of his connection to Captain Clavering.

"You are Captain Boddle," she said, looking hard at Doodles, as he bowed to her on entering the room.

"You are Captain Boddle," she said, staring intently at Doodles as he bowed to her upon entering the room.

"Captain Boodle, ma'am; at your service."

"Captain Boodle, ma'am; at your service."

"Oh, Captain Bood-dle; it is English name, I suppose?"

"Oh, Captain Boodle; it's an English name, I guess?"

"Certainly, ma'am, certainly. Altogether English, I believe. Our Boodles come out of Warwickshire; small property near Leamington,—doosed small, I'm sorry to say."

"Sure thing, ma'am, absolutely. Definitely English, I think. Our Boodles are from Warwickshire; a small property near Leamington—really small, I’m sorry to say."

She looked at him very hard, and was altogether unable to discover what was the nature or probable mode of life of the young man before her. She had lived much in England, and had known Englishmen of many classes, but she could not remember that she had ever become conversant with such a one as he who was now before her. Was he a gentleman, or might he be a housebreaker? "A doosed small property near Leamington," she said, repeating the words after him. "Oh!"

She stared at him intently and couldn’t figure out what kind of person he was or how he lived. She had spent a lot of time in England and had met English men from various backgrounds, but she couldn’t recall ever encountering someone like him. Was he a gentleman, or could he be a burglar? “A really small property near Leamington,” she said, echoing his words. “Oh!”

"But my visit to you, ma'am, has nothing to do with that."

"But my visit to you, ma'am, isn't related to that."

"Nothing to do with the small property."

"Nothing related to the small property."

"Nothing in life."

"Nothing in life matters."

"Then, Captain Bood-dle, what may it have to do with?"

"Then, Captain Bood-dle, what might it be about?"

Hereupon Doodles took a chair, not having been invited to go through that ceremony. According to the theory created in her mind at the instant, this man was not at all like an English captain. Captain is an unfortunate title, somewhat equivalent to the foreign count,—unfortunate in this respect, that it is easily adopted by many whose claims to it are very slight. Archie Clavering, with his polished leather boots, had looked like a captain,—had come up to her idea of a captain,—but this man! The more she regarded him, the stronger in her mind became the idea of the housebreaker.

Doodles sat down in a chair, even though no one invited her to do so. In her mind at that moment, this guy was nothing like an English captain. The title "captain" is a bit problematic, as it’s too easily taken on by many who don’t really deserve it. Archie Clavering, with his shiny leather boots, had seemed like a captain—he matched her idea of one—but this guy! The longer she looked at him, the more he resembled a burglar in her eyes.

"My business, ma'am, is of a very delicate nature,—of a nature very delicate indeed. But I think that you and I, who understand the world, may soon come to understand each other."

"My business, ma'am, is quite sensitive—very sensitive indeed. However, I believe that you and I, who understand the world, can quickly come to understand each other."

"Oh, you understand the world. Very well, sir. Go on."

"Oh, you get the world. Alright, go ahead."

"Now, ma'am, money is money, you know."

"Now, ma'am, cash is cash, you know."

"And a goose is a goose; but what of that?"

"And a goose is a goose; but so what?"

"Yes; a goose is a goose, and some people are not geese. Nobody, ma'am, would think of calling you a goose."

"Yeah; a goose is a goose, and not everyone is a goose. No one, ma'am, would ever think of calling you a goose."

"I hope not. It would be so uncivil, even an Englishman would not say it. Will you go on?"

"I hope not. That would be so rude, even an Englishman wouldn’t say it. Will you continue?"

"I think you have the pleasure of knowing Lady Ongar?"

"I believe you have the pleasure of knowing Lady Ongar?"

"Knowing who?" said Sophie, almost shrieking.

"Who knows?" Sophie said, almost shouting.

"Lady Ongar."

"Lady Ongar"

During the last day or two Sophie's mind had been concerned very much with her dear Julie, but had not been concerned at all with the affairs of Captain Clavering, and, therefore, when Lady Ongar's name was mentioned, her mind went away altogether to the quarrel, and did not once refer itself to the captain. Could it be that this was an attorney, and was it possible that Julie would be mean enough to make claims upon her? Claims might be made for more than those twenty pounds. "And you," she said, "do you know Lady Ongar?"

During the last day or two, Sophie had been very focused on her dear Julie, but she hadn’t thought at all about Captain Clavering. So, when Lady Ongar's name came up, her thoughts completely drifted to the argument and didn’t once go back to the captain. Could this be a lawyer, and was it possible that Julie would be petty enough to make demands of her? Those demands could be for more than just those twenty pounds. "And you," she said, "do you know Lady Ongar?"

"I have not that honour myself."

"I don't have that honor myself."

"Oh, you have not; and do you want to be introduced?"

"Oh, you haven't; do you want to be introduced?"

"Not exactly,—not at present; at some future day I shall hope to have the pleasure. But I am right in believing that she and you are very intimate? Now what are you going to do for my friend Archie Clavering?"

"Not exactly—not right now; I hope to have the pleasure at some point in the future. But I'm correct in thinking that she and you are pretty close, right? So, what are you going to do for my friend Archie Clavering?"

"Oh-h-h!" exclaimed Sophie.

"Oh wow!" exclaimed Sophie.

"Yes. What are you going to do for my friend Archie Clavering? Seventy pounds, you know, ma'am, is a smart bit of money!"

"Yes. What are you going to do for my friend Archie Clavering? Seventy pounds, you know, ma'am, is a substantial amount of money!"

"A smart bit of money, is it? That is what you think on your leetle property down in Warwickshire."

"A clever investment, is it? That's what you think about your little property down in Warwickshire."

"It isn't my property, ma'am, at all. It belongs to my uncle."

"It’s not my property, ma’am, at all. It belongs to my uncle."

"Oh, it is your uncle that has the leetle property. And what had your uncle to do with Lady Ongar? What is your uncle to your friend Archie?"

"Oh, it's your uncle who has the little property. And what did your uncle have to do with Lady Ongar? What is your uncle to your friend Archie?"

"Nothing at all, ma'am; nothing on earth."

"Nothing at all, ma'am; absolutely nothing."

"Then why do you tell me all this rigmarole about your uncle and his leetle property, and Warwickshire? What have I to do with your uncle? Sir, I do not understand you,—not at all. Nor do I know why I have the honour to see you here, Captain Bood-dle."

"Then why are you telling me all this nonsense about your uncle and his little property, and Warwickshire? What does your uncle have to do with me? Sir, I don’t understand you at all. I have no idea why I have the honor of seeing you here, Captain Bood-dle."

Even Doodles, redoubtable as he was—even he, with all his smartness, felt that he was overcome, and that this woman was too much for him. He was altogether perplexed, as he could not perceive whether in all her tirade about the little property she had really misunderstood him, and had in truth thought that he had been talking about his uncle, or whether the whole thing was cunning on her part. The reader, perhaps, will have a more correct idea of this lady than Captain Boodle had been able to obtain. She had now risen from her sofa, and was standing as though she expected him to go; but he had not as yet opened the budget of his business.

Even Doodles, impressive as he was—even he, with all his cleverness, felt overwhelmed and realized that this woman was more than he could handle. He was completely confused, as he couldn’t figure out if, in all her ranting about her small property, she had genuinely misunderstood him and thought he was talking about his uncle, or if it was all a clever act on her part. The reader might have a clearer understanding of this lady than Captain Boodle had been able to achieve. She had now gotten up from her sofa and was standing as if she expected him to leave; however, he still hadn’t shared the details of his business.

"I am here, ma'am," said he, "to speak to you about my friend, Captain Clavering."

"I’m here, ma'am," he said, "to talk to you about my friend, Captain Clavering."

"Then you can go back to your friend, and tell him I have nothing to say. And, more than that, Captain Booddle"—the woman intensified the name in a most disgusting manner, with the evident purpose of annoying him; of that he had become quite sure—"more than that, his sending you here is an impertinence. Will you tell him that?"

"Then you can go back to your friend and tell him I have nothing to say. And, on top of that, Captain Booddle"—the woman emphasized the name in a really irritating way, clearly aiming to get under his skin; he was totally convinced of that—"more than that, him sending you here is arrogant. Will you tell him that?"

"No, ma'am, I will not."

"No way, ma'am."

"Perhaps you are his laquais," continued the inexhaustible Sophie, "and are obliged to come when he send you?"

"Maybe you're his servant," Sophie continued relentlessly, "and have to come when he calls you?"

"I am no man's laquais, ma'am."

"I am no man's servant, ma'am."

"If so, I do not blame you; or, perhaps, it is your way to make your love third or fourth hand down in Warwickshire?"

"If that's the case, I can't blame you; or maybe it’s just how you express your love in a roundabout way in Warwickshire?"

"Damn Warwickshire!" said Doodles, who was put beyond himself.

"Damn Warwickshire!" exclaimed Doodles, who was beside himself.

"With all my heart. Damn Warwickshire." And the horrid woman grinned at him as she repeated his words. "And the leetle property, and the uncle, if you wish it; and the leetle nephew,—and the leetle nephew,—and the leetle nephew!" She stood over him as she repeated the last words with wondrous rapidity, and grinned at him, and grimaced and shook herself, till Doodles was altogether bewildered. If this was a Russian spy he would avoid such in future, and keep himself for the milder acerbities of Newmarket, and the easier chaff of his club. He looked up into her face at the present moment, striving to think of some words by which he might assist himself. He had as yet performed no part of his mission, but any such performance was now entirely out of the question. The woman had defied him, and had altogether thrown Clavering overboard. There was no further question of her services, and therefore he felt himself to be quite entitled to twit her with the payment she had taken.

"With all my heart. Damn Warwickshire." The awful woman grinned at him as she echoed his words. "And the little property, and the uncle, if you want it; and the little nephew,—and the little nephew,—and the little nephew!" She hovered over him, quickly repeating the last words, grinning, making faces, and shaking herself until Doodles was completely confused. If this were a Russian spy, he’d avoid them in the future and stick to the milder annoyances of Newmarket and the lighter banter at his club. He looked up at her, trying to think of something to say that might help him. He hadn’t done any part of his mission yet, but any chance of that was now completely off the table. The woman had challenged him and had completely dismissed Clavering. There was no longer any question of her helping him, and so he felt justified in mocking her for the payment she had received.

"And how about my friend's seventy pounds?" said he.

"And what about my friend's seventy pounds?" he said.

"How about seventy pounds! a leetle man comes here and tells me he is a Booddle in Warwickshire, and says he has an uncle with a very leetle property, and asks me how about seventy pounds! Suppose I ask you how about the policeman, what will you say then?"

"How about seventy pounds! A little man comes here and tells me he’s a Boodle from Warwickshire, and says he has an uncle with a tiny property, and asks me about seventy pounds! Now suppose I ask you about the policeman, what will you say then?"

"You send for him and you shall hear what I say."

"You call for him and you'll hear what I have to say."

"No; not to take away such a leetle man as you. I send for a policeman when I am afraid. Booddle in Warwickshire is not a terrible man. Suppose you go to your friend and tell him from me that he have chose a very bad Mercury in his affairs of love;—the worst Mercury I ever see. Perhaps the Warwickshire Mercuries are not very good. Can you tell me, Captain Booddle, how they make love down in Warwickshire?"

"No; I wouldn't want to take away a little guy like you. I call for a policeman when I'm scared. Booddle in Warwickshire isn't someone to be afraid of. Why don’t you go to your friend and let him know from me that he picked a really bad guy for his love affairs;—the worst guy I’ve ever seen. Maybe the love interests in Warwickshire aren't that great. Can you tell me, Captain Booddle, how people date down in Warwickshire?"

"And that is all the satisfaction I am to have?"

"And that’s all the satisfaction I get?"

"Who said you was to have satisfaction? Very little satisfaction I should think you ever have, when you come as a Mercury."

"Who said you were supposed to get satisfaction? I doubt you'll find much satisfaction coming in as a Mercury."

"My friend means to know something about that seventy pounds."

"My friend wants to know something about those seventy pounds."

"Seventy pounds! If you talk to me any more of seventy pounds, I will fly at your face." As she spoke this she jumped across at him as though she were really on the point of attacking him with her nails, and he, in dismay, retreated to the door. "You, and your seventy pounds! Oh, you English! What mean mens you are! Oh! a Frenchman would despise to do it. Yes; or a Russian or a Pole. But you,—you want it all down in black and white, like a butcher's beel. You know nothing, and understand nothing, and can never speak, and can never hold your tongues. You have no head, but the head of a bull. A bull can break all the china in a shop,—dash, smash, crash,—all the pretty things gone in a minute! So can an Englishman. Your seventy pounds! You will come again to me for seventy pounds, I think." In her energy she had acted the bull, and had exhibited her idea of the dashing, the smashing and the crashing, by the motion of her head and the waving of her hands.

"Seventy pounds! If you say anything more about seventy pounds, I swear I’ll jump in your face." As she said this, she leaped at him as if she were genuinely about to attack him with her nails, and he, in panic, backed away to the door. "You and your seventy pounds! Oh, you English! What mean people you are! A Frenchman would be embarrassed to act like that. Yes, or a Russian or a Pole. But you—you want everything in writing, like some butcher’s bill. You know nothing, understand nothing, can never talk, and can’t keep your mouths shut. You have no brains, just the head of a bull. A bull can break all the china in a store—bang, smash, crash—all the beautiful things gone in a second! So can an Englishman. Your seventy pounds! You’ll be back to me for seventy pounds, I think." In her fervor, she acted like a bull, demonstrating her idea of dashing, smashing, and crashing with the motion of her head and the waving of her hands.

"And you decline to say anything about the seventy pounds?" said Doodles, resolving that his courage should not desert him.

"And you refuse to say anything about the seventy pounds?" Doodles said, determined that his courage wouldn't let him down.

Whereupon the divine Sophie laughed. "Ha, ha, ha! I see you have not got on any gloves, Captain Booddle."

Whereupon the divine Sophie laughed. "Ha, ha, ha! I see you haven't put on any gloves, Captain Booddle."

"Gloves; no. I don't wear gloves."

"Gloves? No, I don't wear gloves."

"Nor your uncle with the leetle property in Warwickshire? Captain Clavering, he wears a glove. He is a handy man." Doodles stared at her, understanding nothing of this. "Perhaps it is in your waistcoat pocket," and she approached him fearlessly, as though she were about to deprive him of his watch.

"Not your uncle with the little property in Warwickshire? Captain Clavering, he wears a glove. He's a handy guy." Doodles stared at her, not understanding any of this. "Maybe it's in your waistcoat pocket," and she came closer to him confidently, as if she were about to take his watch.

"I don't know what you mean," said he, retreating.

"I don't get what you mean," he said, stepping back.

"Ah, you are not a handy man, like my friend the other captain, so you had better go away. Yes; you had better go to Warwickshire. In Warwickshire, I suppose, they make ready for your Michaelmas dinners. You have four months to get fat. Suppose you go away and get fat."

"Ah, you're not much of a handyman, like my friend the other captain, so you should just leave. Yeah, you should head to Warwickshire. I guess they're getting ready for your Michaelmas dinners there. You’ve got four months to put on some weight. Why not go and enjoy yourself?"

Doodles understood nothing of her sarcasm, but began to perceive that he might as well take his departure. The woman was probably a lunatic, and his friend Archie had no doubt been grossly deceived when he was sent to her for assistance. He had some faint idea that the seventy pounds might be recovered from such a madwoman; but in the recovery his friend would be exposed, and he saw that the money must be abandoned. At any rate, he had not been soft enough to dispose of any more treasure.

Doodles didn't get her sarcasm at all but started to realize that it was probably best to leave. The woman was likely crazy, and his friend Archie had probably been seriously misled when he was sent to her for help. He vaguely thought that he might be able to get back the seventy pounds from such a lunatic, but doing so would put his friend in a tough spot, and he knew he had to let the money go. At least he hadn't been foolish enough to part with any more valuables.

"Good-morning, ma'am," he said, very curtly.

"Good morning, ma'am," he said, quite curtly.

"Good-morning to you, Captain Booddle. Are you coming again another day?"

"Good morning to you, Captain Booddle. Are you coming back another day?"

"Not that I know of, ma'am."

"Not that I know of, ma'am."

"You are very welcome to stay away. I like your friend the better. Tell him to come and be handy with his glove. As for you,—suppose you go to the leetle property."

"You’re totally welcome to stay away. I actually prefer your friend. Tell him to come by and lend a hand with his glove. As for you—why don’t you go check out the little property?"

Then Captain Boodle went, and, as soon as he had made his way out into the open street, stood still and looked around him, that by the aspect of things familiar to his eyes he might be made certain that he was in a world with which he was conversant. While in that room with the Spy he had ceased to remember that he was in London,—his own London, within a mile of his club, within a mile of Tattersall's. He had been, as it were, removed to some strange world in which the tact, and courage, and acuteness natural to him had not been of avail to him. Madame Gordeloup had opened a new world to him,—a new world of which he desired to make no further experience. Gradually he began to understand why he had been desired to prepare himself for Michaelmas eating. Gradually some idea about Archie's glove glimmered across his brain. A wonderful woman certainly was the Russian spy,—a phenomenon which in future years he might perhaps be glad to remember that he had seen in the flesh. The first race-horse which he might ever own and name himself he would certainly call the Russian spy. In the meantime, as he slowly walked across Berkeley Square, he acknowledged to himself that she was not mad, and acknowledged also that the less said about that seventy pounds the better. From thence he crossed Piccadilly, and sauntered down St. James's Street into Pall Mall, revolving in his mind how he would carry himself with Clavvy. He, at any rate, had his ground for triumph. He had parted with no money, and had ascertained by his own wit that no available assistance from that quarter was to be had in the matter which his friend had in hand.

Then Captain Boodle left, and as soon as he stepped out onto the street, he paused and looked around to reassure himself that he was in a familiar world. While he was in that room with the Spy, he had forgotten that he was in London—his own London, just a mile from his club, a mile from Tattersall's. It felt like he’d been transported to some strange world where his usual skills of tact, courage, and insight did not serve him. Madame Gordeloup had introduced him to a new world—one he didn’t want to experience again. Gradually, he began to understand why he had been asked to prepare for the Michaelmas feast. An idea about Archie's glove slowly flickered in his mind. The Russian spy was certainly a remarkable woman—a phenomenon he might be glad to say he had encountered in person in later years. If he ever owned a racehorse, he would definitely name it the Russian spy. Meanwhile, as he strolled across Berkeley Square, he acknowledged to himself that she wasn’t crazy, and he also realized that the less said about that seventy pounds, the better. After that, he crossed Piccadilly and wandered down St. James's Street into Pall Mall, thinking about how he would handle Clavvy. At least he had reason to feel triumphant; he hadn’t spent any money, and he had figured out on his own that no help would be coming from that direction for the matter his friend was dealing with.

It was some hours after this when the two friends met, and at that time Doodles was up to his eyes in chalk and the profitable delights of pool. But Archie was too intent on his business to pay much regard to his friend's proper avocation. "Well, Doodles," he said, hardly waiting till his ambassador had finished his stroke and laid his ball close waxed to one of the cushions. "Well; have you seen her?"

It was a few hours later when the two friends met, and by then Doodles was covered in chalk and fully immersed in the enjoyable game of pool. But Archie was too focused on his own agenda to pay much attention to what Doodles was up to. "So, Doodles," he said, barely waiting for his friend to finish his shot and position the ball close to one of the cushions. "So, have you seen her?"

"Oh, yes; I've seen her," said Doodles, seating himself on an exalted bench which ran round the room, while Archie, with anxious eyes, stood before him.

"Oh, yeah; I've seen her," said Doodles, sitting down on a high bench that went all around the room, while Archie, looking worried, stood in front of him.

"Well?" said Archie.

"Well?" Archie asked.

"She's a rum 'un. Thank 'ee, Griggs; you always stand to me like a brick." This was said to a young lieutenant who had failed to hit the captain's ball, and now tendered him a shilling with a very bitter look.

"She's a real piece of work. Thanks, Griggs; you always support me like a true friend." This was said to a young lieutenant who had missed the captain's ball and was now offering him a shilling with a very bitter expression.

"She is queer," said Archie,—"certainly."

"She’s queer," said Archie,—"definitely."

"Queer! By George, I'll back her for the queerest bit of horseflesh going any way about these diggings. I thought she was mad at first, but I believe she knows what she's about."

"Strange! Honestly, I'll support her as the most unusual horse around here. I thought she was crazy at first, but I think she knows what she's doing."

"She knows what she's about well enough. She's worth all the money if you can only get her to work."

"She knows exactly what she's doing. She's worth every penny if you can just get her to put in the effort."

"Bosh, my dear fellow."

"Nonsense, my dear friend."

"Why bosh? What's up now?"

"Why the fuss? What's wrong now?"

"Bosh! Bosh! Bosh! Me to play, is it?" Down he went, and not finding a good open for a hazard, again waxed himself to the cushion, to the infinite disgust of Griggs, who did indeed hit the ball this time, but in such a way as to make the loss of another life from Griggs' original three a matter of certainty. "I don't think it's hardly fair," whispered Griggs to a friend, "a man playing always for safety. It's not the game I like, and I shan't play at the same table with Doodles any more."

"Bosh! Bosh! Bosh! Am I supposed to play?" Down he went, and not finding a good shot for a hazard, he leaned back against the cushion again, much to Griggs' annoyance. Griggs did hit the ball this time, but in such a way that losing another life from his original three was a certainty. "I don't think it's fair," Griggs whispered to a friend, "a guy always playing it safe. It's not the kind of game I enjoy, and I won't play at the same table with Doodles anymore."

"It's all bosh," repeated Doodles, coming back to his seat. "She don't mean to do anything, and never did. I've found her out."

"It's all nonsense," Doodles said again as he returned to his seat. "She doesn’t intend to do anything, and never has. I've figured her out."

"Found out what?"

"Discovered what?"

"She's been laughing at you. She got your money out from under your glove, didn't she?"

"She's been laughing at you. She took your money right out from under your glove, didn't she?"

"Well, I did put it there."

"Yeah, I put it there."

"Of course you did. I knew that I should find out what was what if I once went there. I got it all out of her. But, by George, what a woman she is! She swore at me to my very face."

"Of course you did. I knew that I needed to figure out what was going on if I ever went there. I got everything out of her. But, wow, what a woman she is! She cursed at me right to my face."

"Swore at you! In French you mean?"

"Did you swear at me? You mean in French?"

"No; not in French at all, but damned me in downright English. By George, how I did laugh!—me and everybody belonging to me. I'm blessed if she didn't."

"No; not in French at all, but cursed me in plain English. By George, I laughed so hard!—me and everyone related to me. I swear she did."

"There was nothing like that about her when I saw her."

"There was nothing like that about her when I saw her."

"You didn't turn her inside out as I've done; but stop half a moment." Then he descended, chalked away at his cue hastily, pocketed a shilling or two, and returned. "You didn't turn her inside out as I've done. I tell you, Clavvy, there's nothing to be done there, and there never was. If you'd kept on going yourself she'd have drained you as dry,—as dry as that table. There's your thirty pounds back, and, upon my word, old fellow, you ought to thank me."

"You didn’t turn her inside out like I did; but hold on for a second." Then he went down, quickly chalked his cue, pocketed a shilling or two, and came back. "You didn’t turn her inside out like I did. I’m telling you, Clavvy, there’s nothing that can be done about it, and there never was. If you had kept going yourself, she would have drained you completely—just like that table. Here’s your thirty pounds back, and honestly, man, you should be thanking me."

Archie did thank him, and Doodles was not without his triumph. Of the frequent references to Warwickshire which he had been forced to endure, he said nothing, nor yet of the reference to Michaelmas dinners; and, gradually, as he came to talk frequently to Archie of the Russian spy, and perhaps also to one or two others of his more intimate friends, he began to convince himself that he really had wormed the truth out of Madame Gordeloup, and got altogether the better of that lady, in a very wonderful way.

Archie thanked him, and Doodles felt a sense of victory. He didn't mention the countless references to Warwickshire he had to listen to, nor did he bring up the comments about Michaelmas dinners. Gradually, as he talked more often to Archie about the Russian spy, and maybe to a few of his closer friends, he started to believe that he had really managed to pry the truth out of Madame Gordeloup and had completely outsmarted her in a pretty impressive way.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXI.

HARRY CLAVERING'S CONFESSION.

Harry Clavering, when he went away from Onslow Crescent, after his interview with Cecilia Burton, was a wretched, pitiable man. He had told the truth of himself, as far as he was able to tell it, to a woman whom he thoroughly esteemed, and having done so was convinced that she could no longer entertain any respect for him. He had laid bare to her all his weakness, and for a moment she had spurned him. It was true that she had again reconciled herself to him, struggling to save both him and her sister from future misery,—that she had even condescended to implore him to be gracious to Florence, taking that which to her mind seemed then to be the surest path to her object; but not the less did he feel that she must despise him. Having promised his hand to one woman,—to a woman whom he still professed that he loved dearly,—he had allowed himself to be cheated into offering it to another. And he knew that the cheating had been his own. It was he who had done the evil. Julia, in showing her affection for him, had tendered her love to a man whom she believed to be free. He had intended to walk straight. He had not allowed himself to be enamoured of the wealth possessed by this woman who had thrown herself at his feet. But he had been so weak that he had fallen in his own despite.

HHarry Clavering, when he left Onslow Crescent after his discussion with Cecilia Burton, was an absolutely miserable man. He had shared the truth about himself, as much as he could, with a woman he truly respected, and now he was certain that she could no longer hold any admiration for him. He had exposed all his vulnerabilities, and for a moment, she had rejected him. It was true that she had later decided to reconcile with him, trying to save both him and her sister from future pain,—that she had even humbly asked him to be kind to Florence, thinking at that moment that it was the best way to achieve her goal; but still, he felt that she must look down on him. Having promised his hand to one woman—someone he still claimed to love dearly—he had allowed himself to be tricked into proposing to another. And he knew that the deception had been his own. It was him who had committed the wrongdoing. Julia, in demonstrating her affection for him, had offered her love to a man she thought was available. He had intended to be honest. He hadn’t let himself be captivated by the wealth of the woman who had thrown herself at him. But he had been too weak, and he had fallen despite himself.

There is, I suppose, no young man possessed of average talents and average education, who does not early in life lay out for himself some career with more or less precision,—some career which is high in its tendencies and noble in its aspirations, and to which he is afterwards compelled to compare the circumstances of the life which he shapes for himself. In doing this he may not attempt, perhaps, to lay down for himself any prescribed amount of success which he will endeavour to reach, or even the very pathway by which he will strive to be successful; but he will tell himself what are the vices which he will avoid, and what the virtues which he will strive to attain. Few young men ever did this with more precision than it had been done by Harry Clavering, and few with more self-confidence. Very early in life he had been successful,—so successful as to enable him to emancipate himself not only from his father's absolute control, but almost also from any interference on his father's part. It had seemed to be admitted that he was a better man than his father, better than the other Claverings,—the jewel of the race, the Clavering to whom the family would in future years look up, not as their actual head, but as their strongest prop and most assured support. He had said to himself that he would be an honest, truthful, hard-working man, not covetous after money, though conscious that a labourer was worthy of his hire, and conscious also that the better the work done the better should be his wages. Then he had encountered a blow,—a heavy blow from a false woman,—and he had boasted to himself that he had borne it well, as a man should bear all blows. And now, after all these resolves and all these boastings, he found himself brought by his own weakness to such a pass that he hardly dared to look in the face any of his dearest and most intimate friends.

I guess there’s no young man with average skills and education who doesn’t early on set out a career path for himself, more or less clearly—one that’s ambitious and noble, which he then has to measure against the life he builds for himself. In doing this, he might not define a specific level of success he wants to achieve or even the exact route he'll take to get there; but he will definitely outline the vices he plans to avoid and the virtues he will aim to embrace. Few young men have done this with more clarity than Harry Clavering, and few with more self-assurance. From a young age, he had been successful—successful enough to break free not only from his father’s strict control but also from almost any interference from him. It seemed clear that he was a better man than his father, better than the other Claverings—the shining star of the family, the Clavering whom they would look up to in future years, not as their leader, but as their strongest support. He had told himself he would be an honest, truthful, hard-working man, not greedy for money, even though he knew that a laborer deserves fair pay and that better work should earn better wages. Then he faced a setback—a heavy blow from a deceitful woman—and he had convinced himself that he handled it well, as any man should handle adversity. Now, after all these resolutions and boasts, he found himself so weakened by his own failings that he barely dared to look any of his closest friends in the eye.

He was not remiss in telling himself all this. He did draw the comparison ruthlessly between the character which he had intended to make his own and that which he now had justly earned. He did not excuse himself. We are told to love others as ourselves, and it is hard to do so. But I think that we never hate others, never despise others, as we are sometimes compelled by our own convictions and self-judgment to hate and to despise ourselves. Harry, as he walked home on this evening, was lost in disgust at his own conduct. He could almost have hit his head against the walls, or thrown himself beneath the waggons as he passed them, so thoroughly was he ashamed of his own life. Even now, on this evening, he had escaped from Onslow Crescent,—basely escaped,—without having declared any purpose. Twice on this day he had escaped, almost by subterfuges; once from Burton's office, and now again from Cecilia's presence. How long was this to go on, or how could life be endurable to him under such circumstances?

He wasn't shy about reminding himself of all this. He compared the person he wanted to be with the one he had actually become, and he did it without holding back. He didn’t let himself off the hook. We’re told to love others as ourselves, but that’s a tough thing to do. Yet, I think we rarely hate or look down on others as much as we sometimes do to ourselves because of our own beliefs and self-criticism. As Harry walked home that evening, he was consumed by disgust for his own actions. He felt like he could smash his head against the walls or throw himself under the passing wagons, so deep was his shame about his life. Even now, that evening, he had sneaked away from Onslow Crescent—shamefully snuck away—without making any declarations. Twice that day, he had escaped almost by trickery; once from Burton's office and now again from Cecilia’s presence. How long could this go on, and how could life be bearable for him under such conditions?

In parting from Cecilia, and promising to write at once, and promising to come again in a few days, he had had some idea in his head that he would submit his fate to the arbitrament of Lady Ongar. At any rate he must, he thought, see her, and finally arrange with her what the fate of both of them should be, before he could make any definite statement of his purpose in Onslow Crescent. The last tender of his hand had been made to Julia, and he could not renew his former promises on Florence's behalf, till he had been absolved by Julia.

In saying goodbye to Cecilia and promising to write right away and come back in a few days, he was thinking about letting Lady Ongar decide his fate. He definitely felt he needed to see her and figure out what was going to happen with both of them before he could clearly state his intentions in Onslow Crescent. He had last reached out to Julia, and he couldn't make any new promises on Florence's behalf until Julia had freed him from those.

This may at any rate be pleaded on his behalf,—that in all the workings of his mind at this time there was very little of personal vanity. Very personally vain he had been when Julia Brabazon,—the beautiful and noble-born Julia,—had first confessed at Clavering that she loved him; but that vanity had been speedily knocked on its head by her conduct to him. Men when they are jilted can hardly be vain of the conquest which has led to such a result. Since that there had been no vanity of that sort. His love to Florence had been open, honest, and satisfactory, but he had not considered himself to have achieved a wonderful triumph at Stratton. And when he found that Lord Ongar's widow still loved him,—that he was still regarded with affection by the woman who had formerly wounded him,—there was too much of pain, almost of tragedy, in his position, to admit of vanity. He would say to himself that, as far as he knew his own heart, he thought he loved Julia the best; but, nevertheless, he thoroughly wished that she had not returned from Italy, or that he had not seen her when she had so returned.

This can at least be argued on his behalf—that during all the thinking he did at this time, there was very little personal vanity. He had been quite vain when Julia Brabazon—the beautiful and noble-born Julia—first admitted at Clavering that she loved him; but that vanity was quickly shattered by her behavior toward him. Men who are rejected can hardly feel proud of the conquest that led to such an outcome. Since then, he had experienced no vanity of that kind. His love for Florence had been open, honest, and fulfilling, but he didn’t think of himself as having achieved an amazing victory at Stratton. And when he realized that Lord Ongar's widow still loved him— that he was still regarded with affection by the woman who had once hurt him—there was too much pain, almost tragedy, in his situation to allow for any vanity. He would tell himself that, as far as he understood his own heart, he believed he loved Julia the most; yet, he sincerely wished she hadn’t come back from Italy, or that he hadn’t seen her when she did return.

He had promised to write, and that he would do this very night. He had failed to make Cecilia Burton understand what he intended to do, having, indeed, hardly himself resolved; but before he went to bed he would both resolve and explain to her his resolution. Immediately, therefore, on his return home he sat down at his desk with the pen in his hand and the paper before him.

He had promised to write, and he was going to do it that very night. He hadn't managed to make Cecilia Burton understand what he meant to do, as he himself was still unsure; but before he went to bed, he would figure it out and explain his decision to her. So, as soon as he got home, he sat down at his desk with a pen in his hand and paper in front of him.

At last the words came. I can hardly say that they were the product of any fixed resolve made before he commenced the writing. I think that his mind worked more fully when the pen was in his hands than it had done during the hour through which he sat listless, doing nothing, struggling to have a will of his own, but failing. The letter when it was written was as follows:—
 

At last, the words came. I can’t really say they were the result of any firm decision made before he started writing. I feel that his mind flowed more freely with the pen in his hands than it had during the hour he spent sitting around, doing nothing, trying to muster his own will but failing. The letter, once it was written, was as follows:—

Bloomsbury Square, May, 186—.

Bloomsbury Square, May, 186—.

Dearest Mrs. Burton,—I said that I would write to-morrow, but I am writing now, immediately on my return home. Whatever else you may think of me, pray be sure of this, that I am most anxious to make you know and understand my own position at any rate as well as I do myself. I tried to explain it to you when I was with you this evening, but I fear that I failed; and when Mr. Burton came in I could not say anything further.

Dear Mrs. Burton,—I mentioned I would write tomorrow, but I'm writing now, right after getting home. Whatever you might think of me, please know that I genuinely want you to understand my situation as clearly as I do. I tried to explain it when I was with you this evening, but I don’t think I got through; and when Mr. Burton arrived, I couldn't say anything more.

I know that I have behaved very badly to your sister,—very badly, even though she should never become aware that I have done so. Not that that is possible, for if she were to be my wife to-morrow I should tell her everything. But badly as you must think of me, I have never for a moment had a premeditated intention to deceive her. I believe you do know on what terms I had stood with Miss Brabazon before her marriage, and that when she married, whatever my feelings might be, there was no self-accusation. And after that you know all that took place between me and Florence till the return of Lord Ongar's widow. Up to that time everything had been fair between us. I had told Florence of my former attachment, and she probably thought but little of it. Such things are so common with men! Some change happens as had happened with me, and a man's second love is often stronger and more worthy of a woman's acceptance than the first. At any rate, she knew it, and there was, so far, an end of it. And you understood, also, how very anxious I was to avoid delay in our marriage. No one knows that better than you,—not even Florence,—for I have talked it over with you so often; and you will remember how I have begged you to assist me. I don't blame my darling Florence. She was doing what she deemed best; but oh, if she had only been guided by what you once said to her!

I know I've treated your sister very poorly—really poorly, even though she should never find out. Not that it’s possible, because if she were going to be my wife tomorrow, I would tell her everything. But despite how badly you must think of me, I've never meant to deceive her. I believe you know what my relationship with Miss Brabazon was like before she got married, and that when she married, no matter my feelings, I felt no guilt. And after that, you know everything that happened between me and Florence until Lord Ongar's widow returned. Up to that point, everything was fair between us. I had told Florence about my previous attachment, and she probably didn’t think much of it. Such things are so common for men! Sometimes feelings change, as they did for me, and a man's second love is often stronger and more deserving of a woman's acceptance than the first. Anyway, she knew, and that was that. And you also knew how eager I was to avoid any delay in our marriage. No one knows that better than you—not even Florence—because I've discussed it with you so often, and you’ll remember how I’ve asked for your help. I don’t blame my dear Florence. She was doing what she thought was best; but oh, if only she had taken your advice!

Then Lord Ongar's widow returned; and dear Mrs. Burton, though I fear you think ill of her, you must remember that as far as you know, or I, she has done nothing wrong, has been in no respect false, since her marriage. As to her early conduct to me, she did what many women have done, but what no woman should do. But how can I blame her, knowing how terrible has been my own weakness! But as to her conduct since her marriage, I implore you to believe with me that she has been sinned against grievously, and has not sinned. Well; as you know, I met her. It was hardly unnatural that I should do so, as we are connected. But whether natural or unnatural, foolish or wise, I went to her often. I thought at first that she must know of my engagement as her sister knew it well, and had met Florence. But she did not know it; and so, having none near her that she could love, hardly a friend but myself, grievously wronged by the world and her own relatives, thinking that with her wealth she could make some amends to me for her former injury, she—. Dear Mrs. Burton, I think you will understand it now, and will see that she at least is free from blame.

Then Lord Ongar's widow returned, and dear Mrs. Burton, even though I worry you might look down on her, you must remember that as far as you or I know, she hasn’t done anything wrong or been deceitful since her marriage. As for her earlier behavior towards me, she did what many women have done, but what no woman should. However, how can I blame her when I’m aware of my own serious weaknesses? But regarding her actions since her marriage, I beg you to believe with me that she has been deeply wronged and hasn’t wronged anyone. Well, as you know, I met her. It wasn’t unnatural for me to do so, given our connection. But whether it was natural or not, wise or foolish, I visited her frequently. At first, I thought she must know about my engagement since her sister knew it well and had met Florence. But she didn’t know; and so, with no one else she could love, hardly a friend but me, deeply wronged by the world and her own family, thinking that with her wealth she could make some amends to me for the hurt she caused before, she— Dear Mrs. Burton, I hope you understand now and see that at least she bears no blame.

I am not defending myself; of course all this should have been without effect on me. But I had loved her so dearly! I do love her still so dearly! Love like that does not die. When she left me it was natural that I should seek some one else to love. When she returned to me,—when I found that in spite of her faults she had loved me through it all, I—I yielded and became false and a traitor.

I’m not trying to defend myself; obviously, all this should not have affected me. But I loved her so deeply! I still love her so deeply! A love like that doesn’t fade away. When she left me, it was only natural to look for someone else to love. When she came back to me—when I realized that despite her flaws she had loved me all along, I—I gave in and became dishonest and a traitor.

I say that I love her still; but I know well that Florence is far the nobler woman of the two. Florence never could have done what she did. In nature, in mind, in acquirement, in heart, Florence is the better. The man who marries Florence must be happy if any woman can make a man happy. Of her of whom I am now speaking, I know well that I cannot say that. How then, you will ask, can I be fool enough, having had such a choice, to doubt between the two! How is it that man doubts between vice and virtue, between honour and dishonour, between heaven and hell?

I still say I love her; but I know that Florence is the far nobler woman of the two. Florence could never have done what she did. In character, in intelligence, in achievements, in kindness, Florence is better. The man who marries Florence will be happy if any woman can make a man happy. As for the woman I'm talking about now, I know I can’t say the same. So then, you might ask, how can I be foolish enough to doubt between the two after having such a choice? How is it that a man hesitates between right and wrong, between honor and disgrace, between heaven and hell?

But all this is nothing to you. I do not know whether Florence would take me now. I am well aware that I have no right to expect that she should. But if I understood you aright this evening, she, as yet, has heard nothing of all this. What must she think of me for not writing to her! But I could not bring myself to write in a false spirit; and how could I tell her all that I have now told to you?

But none of this matters to you. I’m not sure if Florence would want me now. I know I can’t expect her to. But if I understood you correctly tonight, she hasn’t heard anything about this yet. What must she think of me for not writing to her? I just couldn't write to her dishonestly; and how could I explain everything I’ve just shared with you?

I know that you wish that our engagement should go on. Dear Mrs. Burton, I love you so dearly for wishing it! Mr. Burton, when he shall have heard everything, will, I fear, think differently. For me, I feel that I must see Lady Ongar before I can again go to your house, and I write now chiefly to tell you that this is what I have determined to do. I believe she is now away, in the Isle of Wight, but I will see her as soon as she returns. After that I will either come to Onslow Crescent or send. Florence will be with you then. She of course must know everything, and you have my permission to show this letter to her if you think well to do so.—Most sincerely and affectionately yours,

I know you want our engagement to continue. Dear Mrs. Burton, I truly appreciate your desire for that! Mr. Burton, once he knows everything, will probably have a different opinion. As for me, I feel I need to see Lady Ongar before I can visit your home again, and I'm writing to let you know that I've made this decision. I believe she’s currently away on the Isle of Wight, but I’ll make sure to see her as soon as she’s back. After that, I’ll either come to Onslow Crescent or send a message. Florence will be with you then, and she definitely needs to know everything. You have my permission to share this letter with her if you think it’s appropriate.—Most sincerely and affectionately yours,

Harry Clavering.
 

Harry Clavering.

This he delivered himself the next morning at the door in Onslow Crescent, taking care not to be there till after Theodore Burton should have gone from home. He left a card also, so that it might be known, not only that he had brought it himself, but that he had intended Mrs. Burton to be aware of that fact. Then he went and wandered about, and passed his day in misery, as such men do when they are thoroughly discontented with their own conduct. This was the Saturday on which Lady Ongar returned with her Sophie from the Isle of Wight; but of that premature return Harry knew nothing, and therefore allowed the Sunday to pass by without going to Bolton Street. On the Monday morning he received a letter from home which made it necessary,—or induced him to suppose it to be necessary, that he should go home to Clavering, at any rate for one day. This he did on the Monday, sending a line to Mrs. Burton to say whither he was gone, and that he should be back by Wednesday night or Thursday morning,—and imploring her to give his love to Florence, if she would venture to do so. Mrs. Burton would know what must be his first business in London on his return, and she might be sure he would come or send to Onslow Crescent as soon as that was over.

He delivered this himself the next morning at the door on Onslow Crescent, making sure not to arrive until after Theodore Burton had left home. He also left a card to let it be known that he had brought it himself and that he intended for Mrs. Burton to be aware of that. Then he went off and spent his day in misery, as such men do when they are really unhappy with their own actions. This was the Saturday when Lady Ongar returned with her Sophie from the Isle of Wight, but Harry had no idea about her early return, so he let Sunday go by without visiting Bolton Street. On Monday morning, he got a letter from home that made it seem necessary— or at least made him think it was necessary— for him to return to Clavering, at least for one day. He did this on Monday, sending a note to Mrs. Burton to let her know where he was going and that he would be back by Wednesday night or Thursday morning, and asking her to send his love to Florence if she felt comfortable doing so. Mrs. Burton would understand what his first priority in London would be upon his return, and she could be sure that he would come or reach out to Onslow Crescent as soon as that was taken care of.

Harry's letter,—the former and longer letter, Cecilia had read over, till she nearly knew it by heart, before her husband's return. She well understood that he would be very hard upon Harry. He had been inclined to forgive Clavering for what had been remiss,—to forgive the silence, the absence from the office, and the want of courtesy to his wife, till Harry had confessed his sin;—but he could not endure that his sister should seek the hand of a man who had declared himself to be in doubt whether he would take it, or that any one should seek it for her, in her ignorance of all the truth. His wife, on the other hand, simply looked to Florence's comfort and happiness. That Florence should not suffer the pang of having been deceived and rejected was all in all to Cecilia. "Of course she must know it some day," the wife had pleaded to her husband. "He is not the man to keep anything secret. But if she is told when he has returned to her, and is good to her, the happiness of the return will cure the other misery." But Burton would not submit to this. "To be comfortable at present is not everything," he said. "If the man be so miserably weak that he does not even now know his own mind, Florence had better take her punishment, and be quit of him."

Harry's letter—the longer one that Cecilia had read over until she nearly knew it by heart—had arrived before her husband's return. She understood that he would be very tough on Harry. He had been somewhat willing to forgive Clavering for his failings—his silence, absence from the office, and lack of courtesy towards his wife—until Harry admitted his wrongdoing; but he couldn't stand the idea of his sister wanting to be with a man who wasn't sure if he wanted her, or that anyone should pursue him for her without her knowing the whole truth. His wife, on the other hand, was focused on Florence's comfort and happiness. For Cecilia, it was crucial that Florence wouldn't experience the pain of being deceived and turned away. "Of course she has to find out eventually," the wife had argued to her husband. "He’s not the type to keep anything hidden. But if she learns when he’s back and treating her well, that happiness from his return will help heal the other hurt." But Burton wouldn’t agree to this. "Being comfortable right now isn't everything," he said. "If the guy is so terribly weak that he still doesn’t know what he wants, Florence might as well face the consequences and move on from him."

Cecilia had narrated to him with passable fidelity what had occurred upstairs, while he was sitting alone in the dining-room. That she, in her anger, had at one moment spurned Harry Clavering, and that in the next she had knelt to him, imploring him to come back to Florence,—those two little incidents she did not tell to her husband. Harry's adventures with Lady Ongar, as far as she knew them, she described accurately. "I can't make any apology for him; upon my life I can't," said Burton. "If I know what it is for a man to behave ill, falsely, like a knave in such matters, he is so behaving." So Theodore Burton spoke as he took his candle to go away to his work; but his wife had induced him to promise that he would not write to Stratton or take any other step in the matter till they had waited twenty-four hours for Harry's promised letter.

Cecilia had told him with reasonable accuracy what had happened upstairs while he was sitting alone in the dining room. That in her anger, she had rejected Harry Clavering one moment and then knelt to him the next, begging him to return to Florence—those two incidents she didn’t share with her husband. She accurately described Harry’s adventures with Lady Ongar, as far as she knew. "I can't make any excuse for him; honestly, I can't," said Burton. "If I know what it's like for a man to act badly, deceitfully, like a scoundrel in these matters, he definitely is." That's what Theodore Burton said as he took his candle to go away to his work; but his wife had gotten him to promise not to write to Stratton or take any other action until they had waited twenty-four hours for Harry's promised letter.

The letter came before the twenty-four hours were expired, and Burton, on his return home on the Saturday, found himself called upon to read and pass judgment upon Harry's confession. "What right has he to speak of her as his darling Florence," he exclaimed, "while he is confessing his own knavery?"

The letter arrived before the twenty-four hours were up, and Burton, when he got home on Saturday, found he had to read and judge Harry's confession. "What right does he have to call her his darling Florence," he exclaimed, "while he’s admitting his own wrongdoing?"

"But if she is his darling—?" pleaded his wife.

"But what if she's his favorite—?" pleaded his wife.

"Trash! But the word from him in such a letter is simply an additional insult. And what does he know about this woman who has come back? He vouches for her, but what can he know of her? Just what she tells him. He is simply a fool."

"Garbage! But hearing that from him in a letter is just another insult. And what does he really know about this woman who has returned? He backs her up, but what could he possibly know about her? Only what she tells him. He's just an idiot."

"But you cannot dislike him for believing her word."

"But you can’t hold it against him for believing her."

"Cecilia," said he, holding down the letter as he spoke,—"you are so carried away by your love for Florence, and your fear lest a marriage which has been once talked of should not take place, that you shut your eyes to this man's true character. Can you believe any good of a man who tells you to your face that he is engaged to two women at once?"

"Cecilia," he said, pressing down the letter as he spoke, "you're so caught up in your love for Florence and your worry that the marriage people have talked about might not happen that you're ignoring this guy's real character. Can you really believe anything good about a man who straightforwardly tells you he's engaged to two women at the same time?"

"I think I can," said Cecilia, hardly venturing to express so dangerous an opinion above her breath.

"I think I can," said Cecilia, barely daring to voice such a risky opinion above a whisper.

"And what would you think of a woman who did so?"

"And what would you think of a woman who did that?"

"Ah, that is so different! I cannot explain it, but you know that it is different."

"Ah, that's so different! I can't explain it, but you know it’s different."

"I know that you would forgive a man anything, and a woman nothing." To this she submitted in silence, having probably heard the reproof before, and he went on to finish the letter. "Not defending himself!" he exclaimed,—"then why does he not defend himself? When a man tells me that he does not, or cannot defend himself, I know that he is a sorry fellow, without a spark of spirit."

"I know you would forgive a man for anything, but a woman for nothing." She accepted this in silence, likely having heard the criticism before, and he continued writing the letter. "Not standing up for himself!" he exclaimed, "then why isn't he defending himself? When a man tells me he doesn't or can't defend himself, I know he’s just a pathetic guy, lacking any spirit."

"I don't think that of Harry. Surely that letter shows a spirit."

"I don't see that in Harry. That letter definitely shows some character."

"Such a one as I should be ashamed to see in a dog. No man should ever be in a position in which he cannot defend himself. No man, at any rate, should admit himself to be so placed. Wish that he should go on with his engagement! I do not wish it at all. I am sorry for Florence. She will suffer terribly. But the loss of such a lover as that is infinitely a lesser loss than would be the gain of such a husband. You had better write to Florence, and tell her not to come."

"Someone like me should be embarrassed to see in a dog. No man should ever find himself in a situation where he can’t defend himself. No man, in any case, should accept being in such a position. Wish that he should continue with his commitment? I don’t wish that at all. I feel sorry for Florence. She’s going to suffer a lot. But losing a lover like that is far less of a loss than the gain of a husband like him. You should write to Florence and tell her not to come."

"Oh, Theodore!"

"Oh, Teddy!"

"That is my advice."

"That's my advice."

"But there is no post between this and Monday," said Cecilia temporizing.

"But there’s no mail between this and Monday," said Cecilia, stalling.

"Send her a message by the wires."

"Send her a message through the wires."

"You cannot explain this by a telegram, Theodore. Besides, why should she not come? Her coming can do no harm. If you were to tell your mother now of all this, it would prevent the possibility of things ever being right."

"You can't explain this in a text, Theodore. Besides, why shouldn't she come? Her coming won't cause any harm. If you tell your mom about all this now, it will ruin any chance of things ever getting better."

"Things,—that is, this thing, never will be right," said he.

"Things—this thing, will never be right," he said.

"But let us see. She will be here on Monday, and if you think it best you can tell her everything. Indeed, she must be told when she is here, for I could not keep it from her. I could not smile and talk to her about him and make her think that it is all right."

"But let's see. She'll be here on Monday, and if you think it's best, you can tell her everything. In fact, she needs to be informed when she arrives because I couldn't keep it from her. I couldn't smile and chat with her about him and make her think everything is fine."

"Not you! I should be very sorry if you could."

"Not you! I would be really sorry if you could."

"But I think I could make her understand that she should not decide upon breaking with him altogether."

"But I think I could help her understand that she shouldn't decide to cut ties with him completely."

"And I think I could make her understand that she ought to do so."

"And I think I could help her realize that she should do that."

"But you wouldn't do that, Theodore?"

"But you wouldn't do that, Theodore?"

"I would if I thought it my duty."

"I would if I thought it was my duty."

"But at any rate, she must come, and we can talk of that to-morrow."

"But anyway, she has to come, and we can discuss that tomorrow."

As to Florence's coming, Burton had given way, beaten, apparently, by that argument about the post. On the Sunday very little was said about Harry Clavering. Cecilia studiously avoided the subject, and Burton had not so far decided on dropping Harry altogether, as to make him anxious to express any such decision. After all, such dropping or not dropping must be the work of Florence herself. On the Monday morning Cecilia had a further triumph. On that day her husband was very fully engaged,—having to meet a synod of contractors, surveyors, and engineers, to discuss which of the remaining thoroughfares of London should not be knocked down by the coming railways,—and he could not absent himself from the Adelphi. It was, therefore, arranged that Mrs. Burton should go to the Paddington Station to meet her sister-in-law. She therefore would have the first word with Florence, and the earliest opportunity of impressing the new-comer with her own ideas. "Of course, you must say something to her of this man," said her husband, "but the less you say the better. After all she must be left to judge for herself." In all matters such as this,—in all affairs of tact, of social intercourse, and of conduct between man and man, or man and woman, Mr. Burton was apt to be eloquent in his domestic discussion, and sometimes almost severe;—but the final arrangement of them was generally left to his wife. He enunciated principles of strategy,—much, no doubt, to her benefit; but she actually fought the battles.

As for Florence's arrival, Burton had given in, seemingly defeated by the argument regarding the post. On Sunday, very little was mentioned about Harry Clavering. Cecilia purposely steered clear of the topic, and Burton had not yet decided to completely eliminate Harry from the conversation, as that would only make him anxious to express any such choice. Ultimately, the decision to drop or keep him in the picture would have to come from Florence herself. On Monday morning, Cecilia had another victory. Her husband was completely tied up with meetings—having to meet with a group of contractors, surveyors, and engineers to discuss which remaining streets in London shouldn't be destroyed by the upcoming railways—and he couldn’t step away from the Adelphi. So, it was arranged for Mrs. Burton to go to Paddington Station to greet her sister-in-law. This meant she would get the first opportunity to talk to Florence and influence her with her own ideas. "Of course, you need to mention this guy to her," her husband said, "but the less you say, the better. She has to be able to form her own opinion." In matters like this—regarding social etiquette and interactions between people—Mr. Burton could be quite articulate in their domestic discussions, sometimes bordering on strict; however, the ultimate decisions were usually left to his wife. He would lay out strategic principles, which likely benefited her greatly, but she was the one who actually fought the battles.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXII.

FLORENCE BURTON PACKS UP A PACKET.

Though nobody had expressed to Florence at Stratton any fear of Harry Clavering's perfidy, that young lady was not altogether easy in her mind. Weeks and weeks had passed, and she had not heard from him. Her mother was manifestly uneasy, and had announced some days before Florence's departure, her surprise and annoyance in not having heard from her eldest son. When Florence inquired as to the subject of the expected letter, her mother put the question aside, saying, with a little assumed irritability, that of course she liked to get an answer to her letters when she took the trouble to write them. And when the day for Florence's journey drew nigh, the old lady became more and more uneasy,—showing plainly that she wished her daughter was not going to London. But Florence, as she was quite determined to go, said nothing to all this. Her father also was uneasy, and neither of them had for some days named her lover in her hearing. She knew that there was something wrong, and felt that it was better that she should go to London and learn the truth.

Though nobody had told Florence at Stratton that they were worried about Harry Clavering's betrayal, she still felt a bit uneasy. Weeks had gone by, and she hadn’t heard from him. Her mother was clearly anxious and had expressed just days before Florence's departure her surprise and frustration at not hearing from her eldest son. When Florence asked about the letter they were expecting, her mother brushed the question aside, saying with a hint of fake irritation that she obviously liked to get replies when she bothered to write. As the day of Florence's journey approached, her mother became increasingly anxious, making it clear she wished her daughter wasn't going to London. But Florence was determined to go and said nothing about it. Her father was also worried, and neither of them had mentioned her boyfriend around her for days. She sensed that something was wrong and felt it was better to go to London and find out the truth.

No female heart was ever less prone to suspicion than the heart of Florence Burton. Among those with whom she had been most intimate nothing had occurred to teach her that men could be false, or women either. When she had heard from Harry Clavering the story of Julia Brabazon, she had, not making much accusation against the sinner in speech, put Julia down in the books of her mind as a bold, bad woman who could forget her sex, and sell her beauty and her womanhood for money. There might be such a woman here and there, or such a man. There were murderers in the world,—but the bulk of mankind is not made subject to murderers. Florence had never considered the possibility that she herself could become liable to such a misfortune. And then, when the day came that she was engaged, her confidence in the man chosen by her was unlimited. Such love as hers rarely suspects. He with whom she had to do was Harry Clavering, and therefore she could not be deceived. Moreover she was supported by a self-respect and a self-confidence which did not at first allow her to dream that a man who had once loved her would ever wish to leave her. It was to her as though a sacrament as holy as that of the church had passed between them, and she could not easily bring herself to think that that sacrament had been as nothing to Harry Clavering. But nevertheless there was something wrong, and when she left her father's house at Stratton, she was well aware that she must prepare herself for tidings that might be evil. She could bear anything, she thought, without disgracing herself; but there were tidings which might send her back to Stratton a broken woman, fit perhaps to comfort the declining years of her father and mother, but fit for nothing else.

No woman's heart was ever more trusting than Florence Burton's. Among those she was closest to, nothing had happened to make her think that men could be unfaithful or that women could be, either. When she heard from Harry Clavering about Julia Brabazon, she didn’t blame Julia too harshly; instead, she figured Julia was just a bold, bad woman who could put aside her femininity to sell her looks and her womanhood for money. There might be women like that out there, or men, too. There were murderers in the world, but most people aren’t victims of murderers. Florence never thought she could become a victim of such bad luck. Then, when the day came that she got engaged, her trust in the man she chose was absolute. The kind of love she felt rarely doubts. The man she was involved with was Harry Clavering, so she believed she couldn't be betrayed. Plus, she had a strong sense of self-respect and confidence that made her believe no man who had once loved her would ever want to leave her. It felt to her as if a sacred bond, as holy as a church sacrament, had formed between them, and she couldn’t easily accept that this bond meant nothing to Harry Clavering. However, deep down, she sensed that something wasn’t right, and when she left her father's house in Stratton, she knew she had to brace herself for news that might be bad. She thought she could handle anything without losing her dignity, but there were messages that could send her back to Stratton as a broken woman—someone who could perhaps console her aging parents but wasn’t fit for much else.

Her mother watched her closely as she sat at her breakfast that morning, but much could not be gained by watching Florence Burton when Florence wished to conceal her thoughts. Many messages were sent to Theodore, to Cecilia, and to the children, messages to others of the Burton clan who were in town, but not a word was said of Harry Clavering. The very absence of his name was enough to make them all wretched, but Florence bore it as the Spartan boy bore the fox beneath his tunic. Mrs. Burton could hardly keep herself from a burst of indignation; but she had been strongly warned by her husband, and restrained herself till Florence was gone. "If he is playing her false," said she, as soon as she was alone with her old husband, "he shall suffer for it, though I have to tear his face with my own fingers."

Her mother watched her closely as she sat at breakfast that morning, but there wasn’t much to be gained by observing Florence Burton when she wanted to hide her thoughts. Many messages were sent to Theodore, to Cecilia, and to the children, as well as to other members of the Burton family who were in town, but nothing was said about Harry Clavering. The mere absence of his name made them all miserable, but Florence handled it like the Spartan boy who kept the fox hidden under his tunic. Mrs. Burton could barely contain her anger, but she had been strongly warned by her husband, so she held back until Florence had left. "If he’s treating her badly," she said as soon as she was alone with her elderly husband, "he will pay for it, even if I have to scratch his face with my own hands."

"Nonsense, my dear; nonsense."

"Nonsense, my dear; nonsense."

"It is not nonsense, Mr. Burton. A gentleman, indeed! He is to be allowed to be dishonest to my girl because he is a gentleman! I wish there was no such thing as a gentleman;—so I do. Perhaps there would be more honest men then." It was unendurable to her that a girl of hers should be so treated.

"It’s not nonsense, Mr. Burton. A gentleman, really! He gets to be dishonest with my girl just because he’s a gentleman! I wish there were no such thing as a gentleman; I truly do. Maybe there would be more honest men then." It was unbearable for her that a girl like hers should be treated this way.

Immediately on the arrival of the train at the London platform, Florence espied Cecilia, and in a minute was in her arms. There was a special tenderness in her sister-in-law's caress, which at once told Florence that her fears had not been without cause. Who has not felt the evil tidings conveyed by the exaggerated tenderness of a special kiss? But while on the platform and among the porters she said nothing of herself. She asked after Theodore and heard of the railway confederacy with a shew of delight. "He'd like to make a line from Hyde Park Corner to the Tower of London," said Florence, with a smile. Then she asked after the children, and specially for the baby; but as yet she spoke no word of Harry Clavering. The trunk and the bag were at last found; and the two ladies were packed into a cab, and had started. Cecilia, when they were seated, got hold of Florence's hand, and pressed it warmly. "Dearest," she said, "I am so glad to have you with us once again." "And now," said Florence, speaking with a calmness that was almost unnatural, "tell me all the truth."

Immediately after the train arrived at the London platform, Florence saw Cecilia, and in a moment was in her arms. There was a special tenderness in her sister-in-law's embrace, which instantly made Florence realize that her fears had not been unfounded. Who hasn’t sensed bad news through an overly sweet kiss? But while on the platform and surrounded by porters, she didn’t say anything about herself. She asked about Theodore and learned about the railway proposal with a show of excitement. "He wants to create a line from Hyde Park Corner to the Tower of London," said Florence, smiling. Then she inquired about the children, especially the baby; but so far, she didn’t mention Harry Clavering. Finally, the trunk and bag were found; the two ladies hopped into a cab and were off. Once they were settled, Cecilia took Florence's hand and squeezed it warmly. "Dearest," she said, "I’m so glad to have you with us again." "And now," Florence said, speaking with a calmness that felt almost unnatural, "tell me everything."

All the truth! What a demand it was. And yet Cecilia had expected that none less would be made upon her. Of course Florence must have known that there was something wrong. Of course she would ask as to her lover immediately upon her arrival. "And now tell me all the truth."

All the truth! What a request that was. And yet Cecilia had anticipated that nothing less would be expected of her. Of course, Florence must have sensed that something was off. Naturally, she would inquire about her partner as soon as she arrived. "Now, tell me everything."

"Oh, Florence!"

"Oh, Florence!"

"The truth, then, is very bad?" said Florence, gently. "Tell me first of all whether you have seen him. Is he ill?"

"The truth is really bad?" Florence asked softly. "First, tell me if you’ve seen him. Is he sick?"

"He was with us on Friday. He is not ill."

"He was with us on Friday. He's not sick."

"Thank God for that. Has anything happened to him? Has he lost money?"

"Thank goodness for that. Has anything happened to him? Has he lost any money?"

"No; I have heard nothing about money."

"No, I haven't heard anything about money."

"Then he is tired of me. Tell me at once, my own one. You know me so well. You know I can bear it. Don't treat me as though I were a coward."

"Then he’s tired of me. Just tell me right away, my love. You know me so well. You know I can handle it. Don’t act like I’m a coward."

"No; it is not that. It is not that he is tired of you. If you had heard him speak of you on Friday,—that you were the noblest, purest, dearest, best of women—" This was imprudent on her part; but what loving woman could at such a moment have endured to be prudent?

"No; that's not it. It's not that he's tired of you. If you had heard him talk about you on Friday—that you were the noblest, purest, dearest, best of women this was reckless of her; but what loving woman could have been sensible at a moment like that?"

"Then what is it?" asked Florence, almost sternly. "Look here, Cecilia; if it be anything touching himself or his own character, I will put up with it, in spite of anything my brother may say. Though he had been a murderer, if that were possible, I would not leave him. I will never leave him unless he leaves me. Where is he now, at this moment?"

"Then what is it?" Florence asked, almost sternly. "Listen, Cecilia; if it has anything to do with him or his character, I’ll deal with it, no matter what my brother may say. Even if he had been a murderer, if that were possible, I wouldn’t leave him. I will never leave him unless he leaves me. Where is he right now?"

"He is in town." Mrs. Burton had not received Harry's note, telling her of his journey to Clavering, before she had left home. Now at this moment it was waiting for her in Onslow Crescent.

"He is in town." Mrs. Burton hadn’t gotten Harry’s note about his trip to Clavering before she left home. Now, at this moment, it was waiting for her in Onslow Crescent.

"And am I to see him? Cecilia, why cannot you tell me how it is? In such a case I should tell you,—should tell you everything at once; because I know that you are not a coward. Why cannot you do so to me?"

"And am I going to see him? Cecilia, why can’t you just tell me what’s going on? If that were the case, I would tell you everything right away; because I know you’re not afraid. Why can’t you do the same for me?"

"You have heard of Lady Ongar?"

"Have you heard of Lady Ongar?"

"Heard of her;—yes. She treated Harry very badly before her marriage."

"Heard of her? Yeah. She treated Harry really poorly before she got married."

"She has come back to London, a widow."

"She has returned to London as a widow."

"I know she has. And Harry has gone back to her! Is that it? Do you mean to tell me that Harry and Lady Ongar are to be married?"

"I know she has. And Harry has gone back to her! Is that it? Are you really telling me that Harry and Lady Ongar are getting married?"

"No; I cannot say that. I hope it is not so. Indeed, I do not think it."

"No, I can't say that. I hope that's not the case. In fact, I don't think it is."

"Then what have I to fear? Does she object to his marrying me? What has she to do between us?"

"Then what do I have to be afraid of? Does she have a problem with him marrying me? What does she have to do with us?"

"She wishes that Harry should come back to her, and Harry has been unsteady. He has been with her often; and he has been very weak. It may be all right yet, Flo; it may indeed,—if you can forgive his weakness."

"She hopes that Harry will come back to her, and Harry has been inconsistent. He has spent a lot of time with her; and he has been very vulnerable. It might still work out, Flo; it really might—if you can accept his flaws."

Something of the truth had now come home to Florence, and she sat thinking of it long before she spoke again. This widow, she knew, was very wealthy, and Harry had loved her before he had come to Stratton. Harry's first love had come back free,—free to wed again, and able to make the fortune of the man she might love and marry. What had Florence to give to any man that could be weighed with this? Lady Ongar was very rich. Florence had already heard all this from Harry,—was very rich, was clever, and was beautiful; and moreover she had been Harry's first love. Was it reasonable that she with her little claims, her puny attractions, should stand in Harry's way when such a prize as that came across him! And as for his weakness;—might it not be strength, rather than weakness;—the strength of an old love which he could not quell, now that the woman was free to take him? For herself,—had she not known that she had only come second? As she thought of him with his noble bride and that bride's great fortune, and of her own insignificance, her low birth, her doubtful prettiness,—prettiness that had ever been doubtful to herself, of her few advantages, she told herself that she had no right to stand upon her claims. "I wish I had known it sooner," she said, in a voice so soft that Cecilia strained her ears to catch the words. "I wish I had known it sooner. I would not have come up to be in his way."

Something about the truth hit home for Florence, and she sat quietly thinking about it long before she spoke again. She realized that this widow was very wealthy, and Harry had loved her before he came to Stratton. Harry's first love was now free—free to marry again and able to enhance the life of the man she chose. What could Florence offer any man that could possibly compare? Lady Ongar was incredibly rich. Florence had already heard all of this from Harry—she was very wealthy, smart, and beautiful; plus, she had been Harry's first love. Was it fair for her, with her limited claims and modest appeal, to stand in Harry's way when such a catch was available to him? And as for his weakness—could it not be seen as strength instead, the strength of a past love he couldn't suppress now that the woman was free to choose him? For her part—hadn't she known all along that she was coming second? As she thought of him with his noble bride and her significant fortune, and of her own insignificance, her low status, her questionable beauty—beauty that she had always doubted herself, and her few advantages—she reminded herself that she had no right to assert her claims. "I wish I had known this sooner," she said in a whisper so soft that Cecilia had to strain to hear. "I wish I had known this sooner. I wouldn’t have come up to be in his way."

"But you will be in no one's way, Flo, unless it be in hers."

"But you won’t be in anyone’s way, Flo, except for hers."

"And I will not be in hers," said Florence, speaking somewhat louder, and raising her head in pride as she spoke. "I will be neither in hers nor in his. I think I will go back at once."

"And I won't be part of hers," said Florence, speaking a bit louder and raising her head in pride as she spoke. "I won't be part of hers or his. I think I’ll go back right away."

Cecilia upon this, ventured to look round at her, and saw that she was very pale, but that her eyes were dry and her lips pressed close together. It had not occurred to Mrs. Burton that her sister-in-law would take it in this way,—that she would express herself as being willing to give way, and that she would at once surrender her lover to her rival. The married woman, she who was already happy with a husband, having enlisted all her sympathies on the side of a marriage between Florence and Harry Clavering, could by no means bring herself to agree to this view. No one liked success better than Cecilia Burton, and to her success would consist in rescuing Harry from Lady Ongar and securing him for Florence. In fighting this battle she had found that she would have against her Lady Ongar—of course, and then her husband, and Harry himself too, as she feared; and now also she must reckon Florence also among her opponents. But she could not endure the idea of failing in such a cause. "Oh, Florence, I think you are so wrong," she said.

Cecilia, noticing this, turned to look at her and saw that she was very pale, but her eyes were dry and her lips were tightly pressed together. Mrs. Burton hadn’t realized that her sister-in-law would react this way—that she would be willing to step aside and immediately give up her lover to her rival. The married woman, who was already happy with a husband, had invested all her support in the idea of a marriage between Florence and Harry Clavering, and she simply could not agree with this perspective. No one loved success more than Cecilia Burton, and for her, success meant rescuing Harry from Lady Ongar and securing him for Florence. In this fight, she found that her opponents included Lady Ongar—of course, along with her husband and Harry himself, as she feared; and now she also had to consider Florence as one of her rivals. But she couldn’t stand the thought of failing in such a cause. "Oh, Florence, I think you’re so wrong," she said.

"You would feel as I do, if you were in my place."

"You would feel the same way I do if you were in my position."

"But people cannot always judge best when they feel the most. What you should think of is his happiness."

"But people can't always make the best judgments when they feel the strongest emotions. What you should consider is his happiness."

"So I do;—and of his future career."

"So I do;—and about his future career."

"Career! I hate to hear of careers. Men do not want careers, or should not want them. Could it be good for him to marry a woman who has been false—who has done as she has, simply because she has made herself rich by her wickedness? Do you believe so much in riches yourself?"

"Career! I can't stand hearing about careers. Men don’t want careers, or at least they shouldn’t. Is it really good for him to marry a woman who has been unfaithful—who has done what she has, just because she got rich through her wrongdoing? Do you really believe in wealth that much?"

"If he loves her best, I will not blame him," said Florence. "He knew her before he had seen me. He was quite honest and told me all the story. It is not his fault if he still likes her the best."

"If he loves her more, I won’t hold it against him," said Florence. "He knew her before he met me. He was completely upfront and shared the whole story with me. It’s not his fault if he still likes her the most."

When they reached Onslow Crescent, the first half-hour was spent with the children, as to whom Florence could not but observe that even from their mouths the name of Harry Clavering was banished. But she played with Cissy and Sophie, giving them their little presents from Stratton; and sat with the baby in her lap, kissing his pink feet and making little soft noises for his behoof, sweetly as she might have done if no terrible crisis in her own life had now come upon her. Not a tear as yet had moistened her eyes, and Cecilia was partly aware that Florence's weeping would be done in secret. "Come up with me into my own room;—I have something to show you," she said, as the nurse took the baby at last; and Cissy and Sophie were at the same time sent away with their brother. "As I came in I got a note from Harry, but, before you see that, I must show you the letter which he wrote to me on Friday. He has gone down to Clavering,—on some business,—for one day." Mrs. Burton, in her heart, could hardly acquit him of having run out of town at the moment to avoid the arrival of Florence.

When they got to Onslow Crescent, the first half-hour was spent with the kids, and Florence couldn’t help but notice that even they didn’t mention Harry Clavering’s name. But she played with Cissy and Sophie, giving them their little gifts from Stratton, and sat with the baby in her lap, kissing his tiny pink feet and making soft sounds to entertain him, just as she would have done if there wasn’t a huge crisis in her own life right now. Not a single tear had wet her eyes yet, and Cecilia partly realized that if Florence cried, it would be in private. “Come up to my room; I have something to show you,” she said as the nurse finally took the baby, while Cissy and Sophie were sent off with their brother. “When I came in, I got a note from Harry, but before you see that, I need to show you the letter he wrote me on Friday. He’s gone down to Clavering for some business, just for one day.” Mrs. Burton couldn't help but think that he had left town just to avoid seeing Florence.

They went upstairs, and the note was, in fact, read before the letter. "I hope there is nothing wrong at the parsonage," said Florence.

They went upstairs, and the note was actually read before the letter. "I hope everything is okay at the parsonage," said Florence.

"You see he says he will be back after one day."

"You see, he says he’ll be back after one day."

"Perhaps he has gone to tell them,—of this change in his prospects."

"Maybe he went to inform them about this shift in his situation."

"No, dear, no; you do not yet understand his feelings. Read his letter, and you will know more. If there is to be a change, he is at any rate too much ashamed of it to speak of it. He does not wish it himself. It is simply this,—that she has thrown herself in his way, and he has not known how to avoid her."

"No, dear, no; you still don’t understand his feelings. Read his letter, and you’ll know more. If anything is going to change, he’s too embarrassed to talk about it. He doesn’t want it himself. It’s just that she has put herself in his path, and he hasn’t figured out how to steer clear of her."

Then Florence read the letter very slowly, going over most of the sentences more than once, and struggling to learn from them what were really the wishes of the writer. When she came to Harry's exculpation of Lady Ongar, she believed it thoroughly, and said so,—meeting, however, a direct contradiction on that point from her sister-in-law. When she had finished it, she folded it up and gave it back. "Cissy," she said, "I know that I ought to go back. I do not want to see him, and I am glad that he has gone away."

Then Florence read the letter very slowly, going over most of the sentences multiple times and trying to understand what the writer really wanted. When she got to Harry's defense of Lady Ongar, she completely believed it and said so—only to be directly contradicted by her sister-in-law on that point. Once she was done, she folded it up and handed it back. "Cissy," she said, "I know I should go back. I don't want to see him, and I'm glad he's gone."

"But you do not mean to give him up?"

"But you don't plan to give him up?"

"Yes, dearest."

"Yes, sweetheart."

"But you said you would never leave him, unless he left you."

"But you said you would never leave him unless he left you."

"He has left me."

"He left me."

"No, Florence; not so. Do you not see what he says;—that he knows you are the only woman that can make him happy?"

"No, Florence; that's not it. Can't you see what he's saying? He knows you're the only woman who can make him happy."

"He has not said that; but if he had, it would make no matter. He understands well how it is. He says that I could not take him now,—even if he came to me; and I cannot. How could I? What! wish to marry a man who does not love me, who loves another, when I know that I am regarded simply as a barrier between them; when by doing so I should mar his fortunes? Cissy, dear, when you think of it, you will not wish it."

"He hasn’t said that, but even if he did, it wouldn’t change anything. He knows exactly how it is. He says I couldn't accept him now—even if he came to me; and I can’t. How could I? What? Want to marry a man who doesn’t love me, who loves someone else, when I know I’m just an obstacle between them; when by doing so I would ruin his chances? Cissy, dear, when you really think about it, you won’t want that."

"Mar his fortunes! It would make them. I do wish it,—and he wishes it too. I tell you that I had him here, and I know it. Why should you be sacrificed?"

"Curse his luck! It would change everything. I truly hope so—and he hopes so too. I’m telling you, I had him right here, and I know it. Why should you have to suffer?"

"What is the meaning of self-denial, if no one can bear to suffer?"

"What does self-denial mean if no one can handle suffering?"

"But he will suffer too,—and all for her caprices! You cannot really think that her money would do him any good. Who would ever speak to him again, or even see him? What would the world say of him? Why, his own father and mother and sisters would disown him, if they are such as you say they are."

"But he'll suffer too—all because of her whims! You can't seriously believe that her money would help him at all. Who would even talk to him again, or see him? What would people say about him? His own parents and sisters would completely cut him off if they really are as you say."

Florence would not argue it further, but went to her room, and remained there alone till Cecilia came to tell her that her brother had returned. What weeping there may have been there, need not be told. Indeed, as I think, there was not much, for Florence was a girl whose education had not brought her into the way of hysterical sensations. The Burtons were an active, energetic people who sympathized with each other in labour and success,—and in endurance also; but who had little sympathy to express for the weaknesses of grief. When her children had stumbled in their play, bruising their little noses, and barking their little shins, Mrs. Burton, the elder, had been wont to bid them rise, asking them what their legs were for, if they could not stand. So they had dried their own little eyes with their own little fists, and had learned to understand that the rubs of the world were to be borne in silence. This rub that had come to Florence was of grave import, and had gone deeper than the outward skin; but still the old lesson had its effect.

Florence didn’t argue about it anymore, but went to her room and stayed there alone until Cecilia came to tell her that her brother had returned. Any tears she might have shed don’t need to be explained. In fact, I believe there weren’t many, because Florence was a girl whose upbringing hadn’t led her to react with excessive emotions. The Burtons were an active, energetic family who supported each other in work and success—and in endurance too; but they didn’t really show much sympathy for the frailty of grief. When her kids tripped during play, scraping their little noses and bruising their tiny shins, Mrs. Burton, the elder, would tell them to get up, asking what their legs were for if they couldn’t stand. So, they learned to wipe their own tears with their own little fists, and came to understand that life’s hardships should be faced in silence. The hardship that had come to Florence was serious and went deeper than just the surface; but still, the old lesson had its impact.

Florence rose from the bed on which she was lying, and prepared to come down. "Do not commit yourself to him, as to anything," said Cecilia.

Florence got up from the bed where she was lying and got ready to head downstairs. "Don't get too involved with him, or anything," said Cecilia.

"I understand what that means," Florence answered. "He thinks as I do. But never mind. He will not say much, and I shall say less. It is bad to talk of this to any man,—even to a brother."

"I get what that means," Florence replied. "He thinks like I do. But let it go. He won't say much, and I’ll say even less. It's not good to discuss this with any man—even with a brother."

Burton also received his sister with that exceptional affection which declares pity for some overwhelming misfortune. He kissed her lips, which was rare with him, for he would generally but just touch her forehead, and he put his hand behind her waist and partly embraced her. "Did Cissy manage to find you at the station?"

Burton also welcomed his sister with a special kind of affection that showed his sympathy for some huge misfortune. He kissed her lips, which was unusual for him, since he typically only touched her forehead. He put his hand around her waist and hugged her a bit. "Did Cissy manage to find you at the station?"

"Oh, yes;—easily."

"Oh, yes; easily."

"Theodore thinks that a woman is no good for any such purpose as that," said Cecilia. "It is a wonder to him, no doubt, that we are not now wandering about London in search of each other,—and of him."

"Theodore thinks that a woman isn’t good for anything like that," said Cecilia. "It must be a wonder to him that we’re not wandering around London looking for each other—and for him."

"I think she would have got home quicker if I could have been there," said Burton.

"I think she would have gotten home faster if I could have been there," said Burton.

"We were in a cab in one minute;—weren't we, Florence? The difference would have been that you would have given a porter sixpence,—and I gave him a shilling, having bespoken him before."

"We were in a cab in a minute, right, Florence? The only difference would have been that you would have given a porter sixpence, and I gave him a shilling since I'd arranged for him in advance."

"And Theodore's time was worth the sixpence, I suppose," said Florence.

"And I guess Theodore's time was worth the sixpence," said Florence.

"That depends," said Cecilia. "How did the synod go on?"

"That depends," Cecilia said. "How did the synod go?"

"The synod made an ass of itself;—as synods always do. It is necessary to get a lot of men together, for the show of the thing,—otherwise the world will not believe. That is the meaning of committees. But the real work must always be done by one or two men. Come;—I'll go and get ready for dinner."

"The synod made a fool of itself, just like synods always do. You need to gather a lot of people for appearances' sake; otherwise, no one will take it seriously. That's what committees are for. But the real work always falls to one or two people. Come on, I'll go get ready for dinner."

The subject,—the one real subject, had thus been altogether avoided at this first meeting with the man of the house, and the evening passed without any allusion to it. Much was made of the children, and much was said of the old people at home; but still there was a consciousness over them all that the one matter of importance was being kept in the background. They were all thinking of Harry Clavering, but no one mentioned his name. They all knew that they were unhappy and heavy-hearted through his fault, but no one blamed him. He had been received in that house with open arms, had been warmed in their bosom, and had stung them; but though they were all smarting from the sting, they uttered no complaint. Burton had made up his mind that it would be better to pass over the matter thus in silence,—to say nothing further of Harry Clavering. A misfortune had come upon them. They must bear it, and go on as before. Harry had been admitted into the London office on the footing of a paid clerk,—on the same footing, indeed, as Burton himself, though with a much smaller salary and inferior work. This position had been accorded to him of course through the Burton interest, and it was understood that if he chose to make himself useful, he could rise in the business as Theodore had risen. But he could only do so as one of the Burtons. For the last three months he had declined to take his salary, alleging that private affairs had kept him away from the office. It was to the hands of Theodore Burton himself that such matters came for management, and therefore there had been no necessity for further explanation. Harry Clavering would of course leave the house, and there would be an end of him in the records of the Burton family. He would have come and made his mark,—a terrible mark, and would have passed on. Those whom he had bruised by his cruelty, and knocked over by his treachery, must get to their feet again as best they could, and say as little as might be of their fall. There are knaves in this world, and no one can suppose that he has a special right to be exempted from their knavery because he himself is honest. It is on the honest that the knaves prey. That was Burton's theory in this matter. He would learn from Cecilia how Florence was bearing herself; but to Florence herself he would say little or nothing if she bore with patience and dignity, as he believed she would, the calamity which had befallen her.

The topic—the one true topic—had completely been avoided during this first meeting with the head of the household, and the evening went by without any mention of it. They talked a lot about the kids and shared stories about the elderly back home; but there was a shared awareness that the main issue was being left unaddressed. They all had Harry Clavering in mind, but no one said his name. They all recognized that they were unhappy and heavy-hearted because of him, but no one pointed fingers. He had been welcomed into their home with open arms, embraced by them, yet he had hurt them; still, even though they were all feeling the pain, they didn’t complain. Burton decided it was better to let the matter slide in silence—no further discussion about Harry Clavering. A misfortune had struck them. They had to endure it and continue as before. Harry had been brought into the London office as a paid clerk—on the same level as Burton himself, though earning a much smaller salary and doing less significant work. This position was granted to him, of course, through Burton's connections, and it was understood that if he was willing to be helpful, he could advance in the business just like Theodore had. But he could only do this as one of the Burtons. For the past three months, he had refused to take his salary, claiming that personal matters had kept him away from the office. These situations were managed directly by Theodore Burton, so there was no need for further explanation. Harry Clavering would inevitably leave, and that would be the end of him in the records of the Burton family. He would have come, made his impact—a significant negative one—and then moved on. Those he had hurt with his cruelty and deceived with his betrayal would have to pick themselves up as best they could and say as little as possible about their fall. There are villains in this world, and no one can think they have a special exemption from their deceit just because they are honest. It is the honest ones that villains prey upon. That was Burton's perspective on this situation. He would find out from Cecilia how Florence was coping; but to Florence herself, he would say little or nothing if she handled the tragedy that had befallen her with patience and dignity, which he believed she would.

But he must write to his mother. The old people at Stratton must not be left in the dark as to what was going on. He must write to his mother, unless he could learn from his wife that Florence herself had communicated to them at home the fact of Harry's iniquity. But he asked no question as to this on the first night, and on the following morning he went off, having simply been told that Florence had seen Harry's letter, that she knew all, and that she was carrying herself like an angel.

But he had to write to his mother. The older folks at Stratton shouldn’t be kept in the dark about what was happening. He needed to write to his mother, unless he could find out from his wife that Florence had already told them about Harry's wrongdoing. But he didn’t ask any questions about this on the first night, and the next morning he left, having just been told that Florence had seen Harry's letter, that she knew everything, and that she was behaving like an angel.

"Not like an angel that hopes?" said Theodore.

"Not like a hopeful angel?" Theodore asked.

"Let her alone for a day or two," said Cecilia. "Of course she must have a few days to think of it. I need hardly tell you that you will never have to be ashamed of your sister."

"Give her a day or two," said Cecilia. "She definitely needs some time to think about it. I shouldn’t have to tell you that you’ll never have to be embarrassed by your sister."

The Tuesday and the Wednesday passed by, and though Cecilia and Florence when together discussed the matter, no change was made in the wishes or thoughts of either of them. Florence, now that she was in town, had consented to remain till after Harry should return, on the understanding that she should not be called upon to see him. He was to be told that she forgave him altogether,—that his troth was returned to him and that he was free, but that in such circumstances a meeting between them could be of no avail. And then a little packet was made up, which was to be given to him. How was it that Florence had brought with her all his presents and all his letters? But there they were in her box upstairs, and sitting by herself, with weary fingers, she packed them, and left them packed under lock and key, addressed by herself to Harry Clavering, Esq. Oh, the misery of packing such a parcel! The feeling with which a woman does it is never encountered by a man. He chucks the things together in wrath,—the lock of hair, the letters in the pretty Italian hand that have taken so much happy care in the writing, the jewelled shirt-studs, which were first put in by the fingers that gave them. They are thrown together, and given to some other woman to deliver. But the girl lingers over her torture. She reads the letters again. She thinks of the moments of bliss which each little toy has given. She is loth to part with everything. She would fain keep some one thing,—the smallest of them all. She doubts,—till a feeling of maidenly reserve constrains her at last, and the coveted trifle, with careful, painstaking fingers, is put with the rest, and the parcel is made complete, and the address is written with precision.

Tuesday and Wednesday went by, and even though Cecilia and Florence talked about it when they were together, neither of them changed their minds or feelings. Now that Florence was in town, she agreed to stay until after Harry returned, under the condition that she wouldn’t have to see him. He was to be told that she completely forgave him—that she was returning his engagement ring and that he was free, but given the situation, meeting would be pointless. Then, a small package was prepared to give to him. How did Florence end up bringing all his gifts and letters? But there they were, stored in her box upstairs, and sitting alone with weary fingers, she packed them away and locked them up, addressed by her to Harry Clavering, Esq. Oh, the misery of putting together such a package! The way a woman feels while doing it is something a man never experiences. He angrily tosses the items together—the lock of hair, the letters in the lovely Italian script that were written with so much care, the jeweled shirt studs that were first handled by the fingers that gifted them. They get thrown together and handed over to another woman for delivery. But the girl takes her time with her pain. She rereads the letters. She thinks about the joyful moments each little item brought her. She hesitates to let go of everything. She wishes she could keep at least one thing—the smallest of all. She hesitates—until a feeling of youthful modesty finally makes her pack away the treasured item, with careful, meticulous fingers, alongside the rest, completing the package, and writing the address neatly.

Florence Burton makes up a packet.
Florence Burton prepares a packet.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"Of course I cannot see him," said Florence. "You will hand to him what I have to send to him; and you must ask him, if he has kept any of my letters, to return them." She said nothing of the shirt-studs, but he would understand that. As for the lock of hair,—doubtless it had been burned.

"Of course I can't see him," said Florence. "You will give him what I need to send; and you have to ask him, if he has kept any of my letters, to return them." She didn't mention the shirt-studs, but he would get it. As for the lock of hair,—it was probably burned.

Cecilia said but little in answer to this. She would not as yet look upon the matter as Florence looked at it, and as Theodore did also. Harry was to be back in town on Thursday morning. He could not, probably, be seen or heard of on that day, because of his visit to Lady Ongar. It was absolutely necessary that he should see Lady Ongar before he could come to Onslow Terrace, with possibility of becoming once more the old Harry Clavering whom they were all to love. But Mrs. Burton would by no means give up all hope. It was useless to say anything to Florence, but she still hoped that good might come.

Cecilia said very little in response to this. She wasn't ready to view the situation the way Florence and Theodore did. Harry was set to return to town on Thursday morning. He probably wouldn't be seen or heard from that day because of his visit to Lady Ongar. It was essential for him to see Lady Ongar before he could go to Onslow Terrace, where he might become the old Harry Clavering that they all loved again. However, Mrs. Burton refused to lose all hope. It was pointless to say anything to Florence, but she still held onto the hope that something good might come of it.

And then, as she thought of it all, a project came into her head. Alas, and alas! Was she not too late with her project? Why had she not thought of it on the Tuesday or early on the Wednesday, when it might possibly have been executed? But it was a project which she must have kept secret from her husband, of which he would by no means have approved; and as she remembered this, she told herself that perhaps it was as well that things should take their own course without such interference as she had contemplated.

And then, as she reflected on everything, an idea popped into her mind. Oh no! Was she too late for her idea? Why hadn’t she thought of it on Tuesday or earlier on Wednesday, when it could have actually been done? But it was something she would have had to keep from her husband, who definitely wouldn’t have approved; and as she remembered this, she told herself that maybe it was better for things to unfold naturally without the meddling she had considered.

On the Thursday morning there came to her a letter in a strange hand. It was from Clavering,—from Harry's mother. Mrs. Clavering wrote, as she said, at her son's request, to say that he was confined to his bed, and could not be in London as soon as he expected. Mrs. Burton was not to suppose that he was really ill, and none of the family were to be frightened. From this Mrs. Burton learned that Mrs. Clavering knew nothing of Harry's apostasy. The letter went on to say that Harry would write as soon as he himself was able, and would probably be in London early next week,—at any rate before the end of it. He was a little feverish, but there was no cause for alarm. Florence, of course, could only listen and turn pale. Now at any rate she must remain in London.

On Thursday morning, she received a letter in an unusual handwriting. It was from Clavering—specifically, from Harry's mother. Mrs. Clavering wrote, as she mentioned, at her son's request, to say that he was stuck in bed and wouldn't be in London as soon as he had hoped. Mrs. Burton was not to think he was truly ill, and the family shouldn't be worried. From this, Mrs. Burton realized that Mrs. Clavering was unaware of Harry's situation. The letter continued to say that Harry would write as soon as he could and would likely be in London early next week—at the latest by the end of it. He was a bit feverish, but there was no reason to panic. Florence, of course, could only listen and turn pale. Now, at least, she had to stay in London.

Mrs. Burton's project might, after all, be feasible; but then what if her husband should really be angry with her? That was a misfortune which never yet had come upon her.

Mrs. Burton's project might actually be doable; but what if her husband ended up being really angry with her? That was a misfortune that had never happened to her before.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXIII.

SHOWING WHY HARRY CLAVERING WAS WANTED AT THE RECTORY.

The letter which had summoned Harry to the parsonage had been from his mother, and had begged him to come to Clavering at once, as trouble had come upon them from an unexpected source. His father had quarrelled with Mr. Saul. The rector and the curate had had an interview, in which there had been high words, and Mr. Clavering had refused to see Mr. Saul again. Fanny also was in great trouble,—and the parish was, as it were, in hot water. Mrs. Clavering thought that Harry had better run down to Clavering, and see Mr. Saul. Harry, not unwillingly, acceded to his mother's request, much wondering at the source of this new misfortune. As to Fanny, she, as he believed, had held out no encouragement to Mr. Saul's overtures. When Mr. Saul had proposed to her,—making that first offer of which Harry had been aware,—nothing could have been more steadfast than her rejection of the gentleman's hand. Harry had regarded Mr. Saul as little less than mad to think of such a thing, but, thinking of him as a man very different in his ways and feelings from other men, had believed that he might go on at Clavering comfortably as curate in spite of that little accident. It appeared, however, that he was not going on comfortably; but Harry, when he left London, could not quite imagine how such violent discomfort should have arisen that the rector and the curate should be unable to meet each other. If the reader will allow me, I will go back a little and explain this.

The letter that called Harry to the parsonage was from his mother, urging him to come to Clavering immediately because trouble had arisen from an unexpected source. His father had had a falling out with Mr. Saul. The rector and the curate had a meeting that escalated into a heated argument, and Mr. Clavering refused to see Mr. Saul again. Fanny was also in serious trouble, and the parish, it seemed, was in turmoil. Mrs. Clavering thought that Harry should hurry to Clavering and talk to Mr. Saul. Harry, somewhat willing, agreed to his mother’s request, curious about the reason for this new trouble. As for Fanny, he believed she had not encouraged Mr. Saul’s advances. When Mr. Saul first proposed to her—an offer that Harry was aware of—she had firmly rejected his proposal. Harry considered Mr. Saul to be almost insane for thinking this was possible, but he thought that Mr. Saul, being so different in his attitudes and feelings from others, might still continue comfortably as curate in Clavering despite the little incident. It turned out, however, that he was not comfortable at all; yet, when Harry left London, he couldn't quite understand how such a serious conflict could arise to the point where the rector and the curate couldn’t meet. If the reader will allow me, I’ll go back a bit and explain this.

The reader already knows what Fanny's brother did not know,—namely, that Mr. Saul had pressed his suit again, and had pressed it very strongly; and he also knows that Fanny's reception of the second offer was very different from her reception of the first. She had begun to doubt;—to doubt whether her first judgment as to Mr. Saul's character had not been unjust,—to doubt whether, in addressing her, he was not right, seeing that his love for her was so strong,—to doubt whether she did not like him better than she had thought she did,—to doubt whether an engagement with a penniless curate was in truth a position utterly to be reprehended and avoided. Young penniless curates must love somebody as well as young beneficed vicars and rectors. And then Mr. Saul pleaded his cause so well!

The reader already knows what Fanny's brother didn't know—namely, that Mr. Saul had made his proposal again, and he had done so very insistently; and they also know that Fanny's response to the second offer was quite different from her response to the first. She had started to have doubts;—to doubt whether her initial judgment about Mr. Saul's character was unfair,—to doubt whether, in approaching her, he was wrong, considering how deeply he loved her,—to doubt whether she didn’t actually like him more than she first thought she did,—to doubt whether getting engaged to a broke curate was really a position to be condemned and avoided. Young broke curates can love someone just like young well-off vicars and rectors. And then Mr. Saul pleaded his case so convincingly!

She did not at once speak to her mother on the matter, and the fact that she had a secret made her very wretched. She had left Mr. Saul in doubt, giving him no answer, and he had said that he would ask her again in a few days what was to be his fate. She hardly knew how to tell her mother of this till she had told herself what were her own wishes. She thoroughly desired to have her mother in her confidence, and promised herself that it should be so before Mr. Saul renewed his suit. He was a man who was never hurried or impatient in his doings. But Fanny put off the interview with her mother,—put off her own final resolution, till it was too late, and Mr. Saul came upon her again, when she was but ill-prepared for him.

She didn’t immediately talk to her mom about it, and the fact that she was keeping a secret made her really unhappy. She had left Mr. Saul uncertain, giving him no answer, and he said he would ask her again in a few days what his future would be. She wasn’t sure how to tell her mom until she figured out what she wanted herself. She really wanted her mom to be in the loop and promised herself that she would do so before Mr. Saul asked her again. He was a man who was never rushed or impatient in his actions. But Fanny kept delaying the conversation with her mom—putting off her own final decision—until it was too late, and Mr. Saul approached her again when she was not ready for him.

A woman, when she doubts whether she loves or does not love, is inclined five parts out of six towards the man of whom she is thinking. When a woman doubts she is lost, the cynics say. I simply assert, being no cynic, that when a woman doubts she is won. The more Fanny thought of Mr. Saul, the more she felt that he was not the man for which she had first taken him,—that he was of larger dimensions as regarded spirit, manhood, and heart, and better entitled to a woman's love. She would not tell herself that she was attached to him; but in all her arguments with herself against him, she rested her objection mainly on the fact that he had but seventy pounds a year. And then the threatened attack, the attack that was to be final, came upon her before she was prepared for it!

A woman who isn't sure if she loves someone is usually leaning more towards thinking about that man. Cynics say that when a woman has doubts, she’s already lost. But I believe, and I’m not a cynic, that when a woman has doubts, she’s actually won over. The more Fanny thought about Mr. Saul, the more she realized he wasn’t the man she initially believed him to be—he was more impressive in terms of spirit, masculinity, and heart, and truly deserving of a woman's love. She wouldn’t admit to herself that she was attached to him; instead, she focused her main argument against him on the fact that he only made seventy pounds a year. Then, the sudden and final emotional challenge came at her when she wasn’t ready!

They had been together as usual during the intervening time. It was, indeed, impossible that they should not be together. Since she had first begun to doubt about Mr. Saul, she had been more diligent than heretofore in visiting the poor and in attending to her school, as though she were recognizing the duty which would specially be hers if she were to marry such a one as he. And thus they had been brought together more than ever. All this her mother had seen, and seeing, had trembled; but she had not thought it wise to say anything till Fanny should speak. Fanny was very good and very prudent. It could not be but that Fanny should know how impossible must be such a marriage. As to the rector, he had no suspicions on the matter. Saul had made himself an ass on one occasion, and there had been an end of it. As a curate Saul was invaluable, and therefore the fact of his having made himself an ass had been forgiven him. It was thus that the rector looked at it.

They had been together as usual during that time. It was, in fact, impossible for them not to be together. Ever since she started to doubt Mr. Saul, she had been more dedicated than before to visiting the needy and focusing on her school, almost as if she were acknowledging the responsibilities she would have if she married someone like him. As a result, they had spent more time together than ever. Her mother had noticed all this and had been anxious, but she decided it wasn't wise to mention anything until Fanny brought it up. Fanny was very kind and sensible. It was clear to Fanny that such a marriage was impossible. As for the rector, he had no doubts about the situation. Saul had embarrassed himself once, and that had been the end of it. As a curate, Saul was indispensable, so the rector had forgiven him for that blunder. That was how the rector viewed it.

It was hardly more than ten days since the last walk in Cumberly Lane when Mr. Saul renewed the attack. He did it again on the same spot, and at the same hour of the day. Twice a week, always on the same days, he was in the chapel up at this end of the parish, and on these days he could always find Fanny on her way home. When he put his head in at the little school door and asked for her, her mind misgave her. He had not walked home with her since, and though he had been in the school with her often, had always left her there, going about his own business, as though he were by no means desirous of her company. Now the time had come, and Fanny felt that she was not prepared. But she took up her hat, and went out to him, knowing that there was no escape.

It had barely been ten days since the last walk on Cumberly Lane when Mr. Saul tried again. He did it in the same place and at the same time of day. Twice a week, always on those same days, he was in the chapel at this end of the parish, and on those days he could always count on finding Fanny on her way home. When he poked his head in the little school door and asked for her, she felt a sense of dread. He hadn’t walked home with her since that last time, and although he had been in the school with her frequently, he always left her there, going about his own business as if he didn’t want to be with her at all. Now the moment had arrived, and Fanny sensed that she wasn’t ready. But she picked up her hat and went out to him, knowing there was no way to avoid it.

"Miss Clavering," said he, "have you thought of what I was saying to you?" To this she made no answer, but merely played with the point of the parasol which she held in her hand. "You cannot but have thought of it," he continued. "You could not dismiss it altogether from your thoughts."

"Miss Clavering," he said, "have you thought about what I was saying to you?" She didn't respond but just fiddled with the tip of the parasol she was holding. "You must have thought about it," he went on. "You couldn't just brush it aside completely."

"I have thought about it, of course," she said.

"I've thought about it, of course," she said.

"And what does your mind say? Or rather what does your heart say? Both should speak, but I would sooner hear the heart first."

"And what does your mind say? Or rather, what does your heart say? Both should have a say, but I would rather hear from the heart first."

"I am sure, Mr. Saul, that it is quite impossible."

"I’m sure, Mr. Saul, that it’s absolutely impossible."

"In what way impossible?"

"How is that impossible?"

"Papa would not allow it."

"Dad would not allow it."

"Have you asked him?"

"Did you ask him?"

"Oh, dear, no."

"Oh no."

"Or Mrs. Clavering?"

"Or Ms. Clavering?"

Fanny blushed as she remembered how she had permitted the days to go by without asking her mother's counsel. "No; I have spoken to no one. Why should I, when I knew that it is impossible?"

Fanny blushed as she remembered how she had let the days pass without asking her mom for advice. "No; I haven’t talked to anyone. Why should I, when I know it’s impossible?"

"May I speak to Mr. Clavering?" To this Fanny made no immediate answer, and then Mr. Saul urged the question again. "May I speak to your father?"

"Can I talk to Mr. Clavering?" Fanny didn't respond right away, so Mr. Saul asked the question again. "Can I speak to your dad?"

Fanny felt that she was assenting, even in that she did not answer such a question by an immediate refusal of her permission; and yet she did not mean to assent. "Miss Clavering," he said, "if you regard me with affection, you have no right to refuse me this request. I tell you so boldly. If you feel for me that love which would enable you to accept me as your husband, it is your duty to tell me so,—your duty to me, to yourself, and to your God."

Fanny felt like she was agreeing, even though she didn’t respond to his question with an outright refusal. Still, she didn’t intend to agree. “Miss Clavering,” he said, “if you have feelings for me, you can't deny me this request. I’m being straightforward about it. If you have the kind of love for me that would allow you to consider marrying me, it’s your responsibility to let me know—your responsibility to me, to yourself, and to your God.”

Fanny did not quite see the thing in this light, and yet she did not wish to contradict him. At this moment she forgot that in order to put herself on perfectly firm ground, she should have gone back to the first hypothesis, and assured him that she did not feel any such regard for him. Mr. Saul, whose intellect was more acute, took advantage of her here, and chose to believe that that matter of her affection was now conceded to him. He knew what he was doing well, and is open to a charge of some jesuitry. "Mr. Saul," said Fanny, with grave prudence, "it cannot be right for people to marry when they have nothing to live upon." When she had shown him so plainly that she had no other piece left on the board to play than this, the game may be said to have been won on his side.

Fanny didn’t quite see it that way, but she didn’t want to argue with him. In that moment, she forgot that to be completely clear, she should have gone back to the original idea and told him she didn’t feel that way about him. Mr. Saul, whose mind was sharper, took advantage of her and decided to believe that her feelings were now his to claim. He knew exactly what he was doing and could be accused of some manipulation. “Mr. Saul,” Fanny said with serious caution, “it’s not right for people to get married when they have nothing to live on.” Once she made it clear that she had no other moves left to make in the game, it could be said that he had already won.

"If that be your sole objection," said he, "you cannot but think it right that I and your father should discuss it." To this she made no reply whatever, and they walked along the lane for a considerable way in silence. Mr. Saul would have been glad to have had the interview over now, feeling that at any future meeting he would have stronger power of assuming the position of an accepted lover than he would do now. Another man would have desired to get from her lips a decided word of love,—to take her hand, perhaps, and to feel some response from it,—to go further than this, as is not unlikely, and plead for the happy indulgences of an accepted lover. But Mr. Saul abstained, and was wise in abstaining. She had not so far committed herself, but that she might even now have drawn back, had he pressed her too hard. For hand-pressing, and the titillations of love-making, Mr. Saul was not adapted; but he was a man who, having once loved, would love on to the end.

"If that's your only objection," he said, "then you must agree that I should talk about it with your father." She didn’t respond at all, and they walked down the lane for quite a while in silence. Mr. Saul wished the meeting was over, thinking that in any future encounter, he'd have a better chance of acting like an accepted suitor than he did now. Another man might have wanted a clear expression of love from her—maybe hold her hand and feel some connection—or even go further and ask for the privileges of being an accepted lover. But Mr. Saul held back, and it was smart of him to do so. She hadn’t committed enough to prevent her from walking away if he pushed her too hard. He wasn’t the type for hand-holding or the flirtations of romance, but once he loved, he would love until the end.

The way, however, was too long to be completed without further speech. Fanny, as she walked, was struggling to find some words by which she might still hold her ground, but the words were not forthcoming. It seemed to herself that she was being carried away by this man, because she had suddenly lost her remembrance of all negatives. The more she struggled the more she failed, and at last gave it up in despair. Let Mr. Saul say what he would, it was impossible that they should be married. All his arguments about duty were nonsense. It could not be her duty to marry a man who would have to starve in his attempt to keep her. She wished she had told him at first that she did not love him, but that seemed to be too late now. The moment that she was in the house she would go to her mother and tell her everything.

The journey was too long to remain silent any longer. As she walked, Fanny struggled to come up with words that would allow her to stand her ground, but nothing came to mind. It felt like she was being swept away by this man, as she suddenly lost all sense of the negatives. The more she fought it, the more she failed, and eventually she gave up in frustration. No matter what Mr. Saul said, there was no way they could get married. His arguments about duty were nonsense. It couldn't be her duty to marry a man who would end up struggling to support her. She wished she had told him from the start that she didn't love him, but that felt too late now. As soon as she got home, she would go to her mother and tell her everything.

"Miss Clavering," said he, "I shall see your father to-morrow."

"Miss Clavering," he said, "I will see your father tomorrow."

"No, no," she ejaculated.

"No, no," she exclaimed.

"I shall certainly do so in any event. I shall either tell him that I must leave the parish,—explaining to him why I must go; or I shall ask him to let me remain here in the hope that I may become his son-in-law. You will not now tell me that I am to go?" Fanny was again silent, her memory failing her as to either negative or affirmative that would be of service. "To stay here hopeless would be impossible to me. Now I am not hopeless. Now I am full of hope. I think I could be happy, though I had to wait as Jacob waited."

"I'll definitely do that no matter what. I'll either tell him that I need to leave the parish—explaining why I have to go; or I'll ask him to let me stay here with the hope that I can become his son-in-law. You’re not going to tell me that I have to leave, are you?" Fanny was silent again, her memory failing her as to whether a 'no' or 'yes' would help. "Staying here without hope would be impossible for me. Right now, I'm not hopeless. I'm full of hope. I think I could be happy, even if I have to wait like Jacob did."

"And perhaps have Jacob's consolation," said Fanny. She was lost by the joke and he knew it. A grim smile of satisfaction crossed his thin face as he heard it, and there was a feeling of triumph at his heart. "I am hardly fitted to be a patriarch, as the patriarchs were of old," he said. "Though the seven years should be prolonged to fourteen I do not think I should seek any Leah."

"And maybe get Jacob's comfort," Fanny said. She completely missed the joke, and he realized it. A slight grin of satisfaction spread across his thin face as he heard her, and he felt a sense of triumph inside. "I'm not really cut out to be a patriarch like the ones from back in the day," he said. "Even if the seven years were stretched to fourteen, I still wouldn't look for a Leah."

They were soon at the gate, and his work for that evening was done. He would go home to his solitary room at a neighbouring farm-house, and sit in triumph as he eat his morsel of cold mutton by himself. He, without any advantage of a person to back him, poor, friendless, hitherto conscious that he was unfitted to mix even in ordinary social life—he had won the heart of the fairest woman he had ever seen. "You will give me your hand at parting," he said, whereupon she tendered it to him with her eyes fixed upon the ground. "I hope we understand each other," he continued. "You may at any rate understand this, that I love you with all my heart and all my strength. If things prosper with me, all my prosperity shall be for you. If there be no prosperity for me, you shall be my only consolation in this world. You are my Alpha and my Omega, my first and last, my beginning and end,—my everything, my all." Then he turned away and left her, and there had come no negative from her lips. As far as her lips were concerned no negative was any longer possible to her.

They soon reached the gate, and his work for the evening was finished. He would head back to his solitary room at a nearby farmhouse and sit in triumph as he ate his piece of cold mutton alone. He, without the support of anyone, poor and friendless, having always felt unfit to participate in even ordinary social life—had won the heart of the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. "You'll give me your hand when we say goodbye," he said, and she offered it to him, her eyes focused on the ground. "I hope we understand each other," he continued. "You should at least know this: I love you with all my heart and all my strength. If I succeed, all my success will be for you. If I don’t succeed, you will be my only comfort in this world. You are my Alpha and my Omega, my first and last, my beginning and end—my everything, my all." Then he turned away and left her, and there hadn’t been any rejection from her lips. As far as her lips were concerned, no rejection was possible anymore.

She went into the house knowing that she must at once seek her mother; but she allowed herself first to remain for some half-hour in her own bedroom, preparing the words that she would use. The interview she knew would be difficult,—much more difficult than it would have been before her last walk with Mr. Saul; and the worst of it was that she could not quite make up her mind as to what it was that she wished to say. She waited till she should hear her mother's step on the stairs. At last Mrs. Clavering came up to dress, and then Fanny, following her quickly into her bedroom, abruptly began.

She walked into the house knowing she had to find her mother right away; but she let herself stay in her own bedroom for about half an hour, getting ready for what she wanted to say. She knew the conversation would be tough—much tougher than it would have been before her last walk with Mr. Saul; and the hardest part was that she wasn't entirely sure what she wanted to express. She listened for her mother's footsteps on the stairs. Finally, Mrs. Clavering came upstairs to get ready, and then Fanny quickly followed her into her bedroom and started speaking abruptly.

"Mamma," she said, "I want to speak to you very much."

"Mom," she said, "I really want to talk to you."

"Well, my dear?"

"Well, my dear?"

"But you mustn't be in a hurry, mamma." Mrs. Clavering looked at her watch, and declaring that it still wanted three-quarters of an hour to dinner, promised that she would not be very much in a hurry.

"But you shouldn't rush, Mom." Mrs. Clavering glanced at her watch and said that it was still three-quarters of an hour until dinner, assuring that she wouldn't be too rushed.

"Mamma, Mr. Saul has been speaking to me again."

"Mom, Mr. Saul has been talking to me again."

"Has he, my dear? You cannot, of course, help it if he chooses to speak to you, but he ought to know that it is very foolish. It must end in his having to leave us."

"Has he, my dear? You can’t really do anything about it if he decides to talk to you, but he should realize that it’s really foolish. It’s bound to end with him having to leave us."

"That is what he says, mamma. He says he must go away unless—"

"That's what he says, mom. He says he has to leave unless—

"Unless what?"

"Unless what?"

"Unless I will consent that he shall remain here as—"

"Unless I agree to let him stay here as—"

"As your accepted lover. Is that it, Fanny?"

"As your accepted partner. Is that it, Fanny?"

"Yes, mamma."

"Yeah, mom."

"Then he must go, I suppose. What else can any of us say? I shall be sorry both for his sake and for your papa's." Mrs. Clavering as she said this looked at her daughter, and saw at once that this edict on her part did not settle the difficulty. There was that in Fanny's face which showed trouble and the necessity of further explanation. "Is not that what you think yourself, my dear?" Mrs. Clavering asked.

"Then I guess he has to go. What else can we say? I'll feel sorry for both him and your dad." Mrs. Clavering looked at her daughter and immediately realized that her decision didn’t resolve the issue. There was something in Fanny's expression that indicated concern and the need for more explanation. "Isn't that what you think too, my dear?" Mrs. Clavering asked.

"I should be very sorry if he had to leave the parish on my account."

"I would feel terrible if he had to leave the community because of me."

"We all shall feel that, dearest; but what can we do? I presume you don't wish him to remain as your lover?"

"We all will feel that, dear; but what can we do? I assume you don't want him to stay as your boyfriend?"

"I don't know, mamma," said Fanny.

"I don't know, mom," said Fanny.

It was then as Mrs. Clavering had feared. Indeed from the first word that Fanny had spoken on the present occasion, she had almost been sure of the facts, as they now were. To her father it would appear wonderful that his daughter should have come to love such a man as Mr. Saul, but Mrs. Clavering knew better than he how far perseverance will go with women,—perseverance joined with high mental capacity, and with high spirit to back it. She was grieved but not surprised, and would at once have accepted the idea of Mr. Saul becoming her son-in-law, had not the poverty of the man been so much against him. "Do you mean, my dear, that you wish him to remain here after what he has said to you? That would be tantamount to accepting him. You understand that, Fanny;—eh, dear?"

It was just as Mrs. Clavering had feared. From the moment Fanny started talking, she had a strong sense of how things were going. To her father, it would seem amazing that his daughter had fallen for a man like Mr. Saul, but Mrs. Clavering knew better than he did how far persistence can take a woman—especially when combined with intelligence and strong will. She felt sad but not shocked, and would have accepted the idea of Mr. Saul becoming her son-in-law right away, if it weren't for the man's financial struggles. "Do you mean, my dear, that you want him to stay here after what he said to you? That would basically be the same as accepting him. You get that, Fanny; right, dear?"

"I suppose it would, mamma."

"I guess it would, mom."

"And is that what you mean? Come, dearest, tell me the whole of it. What have you said to him yourself? What has he been led to think from the answer you have given him to-day?"

"And is that what you mean? Come on, darling, tell me everything. What did you say to him yourself? What does he think from the answer you gave him today?"

"He says that he means to see papa to-morrow."

"He says that he plans to see dad tomorrow."

"But is he to see him with your consent?" Fanny had hitherto placed herself in the nook of a bow-window which looked out into the garden, and there, though she was near to the dressing-table at which her mother was sitting, she could so far screen herself as almost to hide her face when she was speaking. From this retreat her mother found it necessary to withdraw her; so she rose, and going to a sofa in the room, bade her daughter come and sit beside her. "A doctor, my dear, can never do any good," she said, "unless the patient will tell him everything. Have you told Mr. Saul that he may see papa,—as coming from you, you know?"

"But is he allowed to see him with your consent?" Fanny had been sitting in the corner of a bow-window that overlooked the garden, and there, although she was close to the dressing table where her mother was, she could position herself just enough to almost hide her face while she spoke. From this spot, her mother felt it was necessary to bring her out; so she stood up, walked over to a sofa in the room, and told her daughter to come sit next to her. "A doctor, my dear, can’t do any good," she said, "unless the patient shares everything with him. Have you told Mr. Saul that he can see dad—as coming from you, you know?"

"No, mamma;—I did not tell him that. I told him that it would be altogether impossible, because we should be so poor."

"No, mom;—I didn’t tell him that. I told him it would be completely impossible because we would be so broke."

"He ought to have known that himself."

"He should have known that himself."

"But I don't think he ever thinks of such things as that, mamma. I can't tell you quite what he said, but it went to show that he didn't regard money at all."

"But I don't think he ever considers things like that, Mom. I can't remember exactly what he said, but it showed that he doesn't think about money at all."

"But that is nonsense; is it not, Fanny?"

"But that's ridiculous, right, Fanny?"

"What he means is, not that people if they are fond of each other ought to marry at once when they have got nothing to live upon, but that they ought to tell each other so and then be content to wait. I suppose he thinks that some day he may have a living."

"What he means is that just because people care for each other doesn't mean they should rush into marriage without any means to support themselves. Instead, they should express their feelings and be okay with waiting. I guess he believes that someday he might be able to make a living."

"But, Fanny, are you fond of him;—and have you ever told him so?"

"But, Fanny, do you like him; and have you ever told him that?"

"I have never told him so, mamma."

"I've never told him that, mom."

"But you are fond of him?" To this question Fanny made no answer, and now Mrs. Clavering knew it all. She felt no inclination to scold her daughter, or even to point out in very strong language how foolish Fanny had been in allowing a man to engage her affections merely by asking for them. The thing was a misfortune, and should have been avoided by the departure of Mr. Saul from the parish after his first declaration of love. He had been allowed to remain for the sake of the rector's comfort, and the best must now be made of it. That Mr. Saul must now go was certain, and Fanny must endure the weariness of an attachment with an absent lover to which her father would not consent. It was very bad, but Mrs. Clavering did not think that she could make it better by attempting to scold her daughter into renouncing the man.

"But you like him, right?" Fanny didn't respond to this question, and Mrs. Clavering understood everything. She didn’t feel the urge to scold her daughter or even to emphasize how foolish Fanny had been to let a man win her affection just by asking for it. It was unfortunate and should have been avoided if Mr. Saul had left the parish after his first confession of love. He had been allowed to stay for the rector's comfort, and now they had to make the best of it. It was clear that Mr. Saul had to go, and Fanny would have to deal with the frustration of being attached to a distant lover that her father wouldn't approve of. It was a tough situation, but Mrs. Clavering didn’t believe she could make it better by trying to scold her daughter into letting go of the man.

"I suppose you would like me to tell papa all this before Mr. Saul comes to-morrow?"

"I guess you want me to tell Dad all this before Mr. Saul comes tomorrow?"

"If you think it best, mamma."

"If you think that's best, Mom."

"And you mean, dear, that you would wish to accept him, only that he has no income?"

"And you mean, dear, that you would want to accept him, except that he has no income?"

"I think so, mamma."

"I think so, mom."

"Have you told him so?"

"Have you told him that?"

"I did not tell him so, but he understands it."

"I didn't say it out loud, but he gets it."

"If you did not tell him so, you might still think of it again."

"If you didn't tell him that, you might still think about it later."

But Fanny had surrendered herself now, and was determined to make no further attempt at sending the garrison up to the wall. "I am sure, mamma, that if he were well off, like Edward, I should accept him. It is only because he has no income."

But Fanny had given in now, and was set on not trying to push the situation further. "I'm sure, Mom, that if he were in a good position, like Edward, I would accept him. It's just because he has no income."

"But you have not told him that?"

"But you haven't told him that?"

"I would not tell him anything without your consent and papa's. He said he should go to papa to-morrow, and I could not prevent that. I did say that I knew it was quite impossible."

"I wouldn't tell him anything without your and Dad's permission. He said he was going to talk to Dad tomorrow, and I couldn’t stop that. I did say I knew it was absolutely impossible."

The mischief was done and there was no help for it. Mrs. Clavering told her daughter that she would talk it all over with the rector that night, so that Fanny was able to come down to dinner without fearing any further scene on that evening. But on the following morning she did not appear at prayers, nor was she present at the breakfast table. Her mother went to her early, and she immediately asked if it was considered necessary that she should see her father before Mr. Saul came. But this was not required of her. "Papa says that it is out of the question," said Mrs. Clavering. "I told him so myself," said Fanny, beginning to whimper. "And there must be no engagements," said Mrs. Clavering. "No, mamma. I haven't engaged myself. I told him it was impossible." "And papa thinks that Mr. Saul must leave him," continued Mrs. Clavering. "I knew papa would say that;—but, mamma, I shall not forget him for that reason." To this Mrs. Clavering made no reply, and Fanny was allowed to remain upstairs till Mr. Saul had come and gone.

The damage was done, and there was no changing it. Mrs. Clavering told her daughter she would discuss everything with the rector that night, which meant Fanny could join them for dinner without worrying about another scene that evening. But the next morning, she didn't come for prayers or breakfast. Her mother checked on her early, and Fanny immediately asked if she needed to see her father before Mr. Saul arrived. But that wasn't necessary. "Dad says it's out of the question," Mrs. Clavering replied. "I told him that myself," Fanny said, starting to cry. "And there can't be any commitments," Mrs. Clavering added. "No, Mom. I haven't committed to anything. I told him it was impossible." "And Dad thinks Mr. Saul should leave him," Mrs. Clavering continued. "I knew Dad would say that; but, Mom, I won't forget him for that reason." Mrs. Clavering didn't respond to this, and Fanny was allowed to stay upstairs until Mr. Saul had come and gone.

Very soon after breakfast Mr. Saul did come. His presence at the rectory was so common that the servants were not generally summoned to announce his arrivals, but his visits were made to Mrs. Clavering and Fanny more often than to the rector. On this occasion he rang the bell, and asked for Mr. Clavering, and was shown into the rector's so-called study, in a way that the maid-servant felt to be unusual. And the rector was sitting uncomfortably prepared for the visit, not having had his after-breakfast cigar. He had been induced to declare that he was not, and would not be, angry with Fanny; but Mr. Saul was left to such indignation as he thought it incumbent on himself to express. In his opinion, the marriage was impossible, not only because there was no money, but because Mr. Saul was Mr. Saul, and because Fanny Clavering was Fanny Clavering. Mr. Saul was a gentleman; but that was all that could be said of him. There is a class of country clergymen in England, of whom Mr. Clavering was one, and his son-in-law, Mr. Fielding, another, which is so closely allied to the squirearchy, as to possess a double identity. Such clergymen are not only clergymen, but they are country gentlemen also. Mr. Clavering regarded clergymen of his class,—of the country gentlemen class, as being quite distinct from all others,—and as being, I may say, very much higher than all others, without reference to any money question. When meeting his brother rectors and vicars, he had quite a different tone in addressing them,—as they might belong to his class, or to another. There was no offence in this. The clerical country gentlemen understood it all as though there were some secret sign or shibboleth between them; but the outsiders had no complaint to make of arrogance, and did not feel themselves aggrieved. They hardly knew that there was an inner clerical familiarity to which they were not admitted. But now that there was a young curate from the outer circle demanding Mr. Clavering's daughter in marriage, and that without a shilling in his pocket, Mr. Clavering felt that the eyes of the offender must be opened. The nuisance to him was very great, but this opening of Mr. Saul's eyes was a duty from which he could not shrink.

Very soon after breakfast, Mr. Saul arrived. His visits to the rectory were so regular that the staff usually didn’t need to announce him, but he tended to spend more time with Mrs. Clavering and Fanny than with the rector. On this occasion, he rang the bell and asked for Mr. Clavering, and was led into the rector's so-called study in a way the maid felt was unusual. The rector was sitting uncomfortably, not quite ready for the visit, having skipped his after-breakfast cigar. He had assured himself that he wouldn't be angry with Fanny; however, Mr. Saul was left to express whatever indignation he felt he should. In his view, the marriage was impossible—not just because there was no money, but also because Mr. Saul was who he was, and Fanny Clavering was who she was. Mr. Saul was a gentleman, but that was about all that could be said for him. There’s a certain type of country clergymen in England, like Mr. Clavering and his son-in-law, Mr. Fielding, who are so closely connected with the local gentry that they seem to blend the two roles. Such clergymen are not only clergymen; they are also country gentlemen. Mr. Clavering viewed clergymen of his kind—as part of the country gentlemen class—as distinct from all others, and I should say, much superior to others, regardless of any money issues. When he interacted with his fellow rectors and vicars, he adopted a different tone, as if they might belong to his class or another. This wasn’t seen as offensive; the clerical country gentlemen understood it as though there were a hidden sign or password between them, while those outside the circle didn’t perceive any arrogance and didn’t feel slighted. They barely realized there was an inner clerical camaraderie to which they weren’t invited. But now, with a young curate from the outer circle seeking to marry Mr. Clavering's daughter without a penny to his name, Mr. Clavering felt it was essential to open Mr. Saul's eyes. This was a significant annoyance for him, but he couldn’t shy away from the duty of enlightening Mr. Saul.

He got up when the curate entered, and greeted his curate, as though he were unaware of the purpose of the present visit. The whole burden of the story was to be thrown upon Mr. Saul. But that gentleman was not long in casting the burden from his shoulders. "Mr. Clavering," he said, "I have come to ask your permission to be a suitor for your daughter's hand."

He stood up when the curate came in and greeted him as if he didn’t know the reason for the visit. The entire weight of the story was meant to fall on Mr. Saul. But that man didn’t take long to push the weight off his back. "Mr. Clavering," he said, "I've come to ask for your permission to seek your daughter's hand in marriage."

The rector was almost taken aback by the abruptness of the request. "Quite impossible, Mr. Saul," he said—"quite impossible. I am told by Mrs. Clavering that you were speaking to Fanny again about this yesterday, and I must say, that I think you have been behaving very badly."

The rector was nearly startled by the suddenness of the request. "Absolutely not, Mr. Saul," he said—"absolutely not. Mrs. Clavering informed me that you spoke to Fanny about this again yesterday, and I must say, I think you've been acting very unreasonably."

"In what way have I behaved badly?"

"In what way have I acted poorly?"

"In endeavouring to gain her affections behind my back."

"In trying to win her over without my knowledge."

"But, Mr. Clavering, how otherwise could I gain them? How otherwise does any man gain any woman's love? If you mean—"

"But, Mr. Clavering, how else could I win them? How else does any man win any woman's love? If you mean—'

"Look here, Mr. Saul. I don't think that there is any necessity for an argument between you and me on this point. That you cannot marry Miss Clavering is so self-evident that it does not require to be discussed. If there were nothing else against it, neither of you have got a penny. I have not seen my daughter since I heard of this madness,—hear me out if you please, sir,—since I heard of this madness, but her mother tells me that she is quite aware of that fact. Your coming to me with such a proposition is an absurdity if it is nothing worse. Now you must do one of two things, Mr. Saul. You must either promise me that this shall be at an end altogether, or you must leave the parish."

"Listen, Mr. Saul. I don’t think we need to argue about this. It’s obvious that you can’t marry Miss Clavering, and there’s no need to discuss it. Even if there weren’t other reasons against it, neither of you has any money. I haven’t seen my daughter since I heard about this nonsense—please let me finish, sir—since I heard about this nonsense, but her mother tells me she’s fully aware of that. Your coming to me with such a proposal is ridiculous, to say the least. Now you have two options, Mr. Saul. You either need to promise that this will be over completely, or you have to leave the parish."

"I certainly shall not promise you that my hopes as they regard your daughter will be at an end."

"I definitely won't promise you that my hopes regarding your daughter will be over."

"Then, Mr. Saul, the sooner you go the better."

"Then, Mr. Saul, the sooner you leave, the better."

A dark cloud came across Mr. Saul's brow as he heard these last words. "That is the way in which you would send away your groom, if he had offended you," he said.

A dark cloud crossed Mr. Saul's face as he heard those final words. "That's how you would send off your groom if he had upset you," he said.

"I do not wish to be unnecessarily harsh," said Mr. Clavering, "and what I say to you now I say to you not as my curate, but as to a most unwarranted suitor for my daughter's hand. Of course I cannot turn you out of the parish at a day's notice. I know that well enough. But your feelings as a gentleman ought to make you aware that you should go at once."

"I don't want to be overly harsh," said Mr. Clavering, "and what I'm saying to you now is not as my curate, but as a completely unwarranted suitor for my daughter's hand. Of course, I can't kick you out of the parish on a moment's notice. I understand that very well. But as a gentleman, you should realize that you need to leave immediately."

"And that is to be my only answer?"

"And that's going to be my only answer?"

"What answer did you expect?"

"What did you expect?"

"I have been thinking so much lately of the answers I might get from your daughter, that I have not made other calculations. Perhaps I had no right to expect any other than that you have now given me."

"I’ve been thinking a lot recently about the answers I might get from your daughter, and I haven't considered anything else. Maybe I didn’t have the right to expect anything more than what you’ve just given me."

"Of course you had not. And now I ask you again to give her up."

"Of course you haven't. And now I'm asking you again to let her go."

"I shall not do that, certainly."

"I'm definitely not doing that."

"Then, Mr. Saul, you must go; and, inconvenient as it will be to myself,—terribly inconvenient, I must ask you to go at once. Of course I cannot allow you to meet my daughter any more. As long as you remain she will be debarred from going to her school, and you will be debarred from coming here."

"Then, Mr. Saul, you need to leave; and, as difficult as it will be for me—extremely difficult—I must ask you to leave immediately. I can’t let you see my daughter anymore. As long as you're here, she won’t be able to attend her school, and you won’t be allowed to come back."

"If I say that I will not seek her at the school?"

"If I say that I won't look for her at school?"

"I will not have it. It is out of the question that you should remain in the parish. You ought to feel it."

"I won't allow it. There's no way you can stay in the parish. You should realize that."

"Mr. Clavering, my going,—I mean my instant going,—is a matter of which I have not yet thought. I must consider it before I give you an answer."

"Mr. Clavering, my departure—I mean my immediate departure—is something I haven't really thought about yet. I need to consider it before I give you an answer."

"It ought to require no consideration," said Mr. Clavering, rising from his chair,—"none at all; not a moment's. Heavens and earth! Why, what did you suppose you were to live upon? But I won't discuss it. I will not say one more word upon a subject which is so distasteful to me. You must excuse me if I leave you."

"It shouldn't need any thought," Mr. Clavering said, getting up from his chair. "Not even for a second. Goodness! What did you think you would survive on? But I'm not going to talk about it. I won't say another word about a topic that bothers me so much. Please excuse me if I take my leave."

Mr. Saul then departed, and from this interview had arisen that state of things in the parish which had induced Mrs. Clavering to call Harry to their assistance. The rector had become more energetic on the subject than any of them had expected. He did not actually forbid his wife to see Mr. Saul, but he did say that Mr. Saul should not come to the rectory. Then there arose a question as to the Sunday services, and yet Mr. Clavering would have no intercourse with his curate. He would have no intercourse with him unless he would fix an immediate day for going, or else promise that he would think no more of Fanny. Hitherto he had done neither, and therefore Mrs. Clavering had sent for her son.

Mr. Saul then left, and from that meeting came the situation in the parish that led Mrs. Clavering to ask Harry for help. The rector had become more proactive about it than they had anticipated. He didn’t outright stop his wife from seeing Mr. Saul, but he did insist that Mr. Saul should not come to the rectory. Then a debate arose regarding the Sunday services, yet Mr. Clavering refused to communicate with his curate. He wouldn’t engage with him unless he would set a date for leaving or promise not to think about Fanny anymore. So far, he had done neither, and that’s why Mrs. Clavering had reached out to her son.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXIV.

MR. SAUL'S ABODE.

When Harry Clavering left London he was not well, though he did not care to tell himself that he was ill. But he had been so harassed by his position, was so ashamed of himself, and as yet so unable to see any escape from his misery, that he was sore with fatigue and almost worn out with trouble. On his arrival at the parsonage, his mother at once asked him if he was ill, and received his petulant denial with an ill-satisfied countenance. That there was something wrong between him and Florence she suspected, but at the present moment she was not disposed to inquire into that matter. Harry's love-affairs had for her a great interest, but Fanny's love-affairs at the present moment were paramount in her bosom. Fanny, indeed, had become very troublesome since Mr. Saul's visit to her father. On the evening of her conversation with her mother, and on the following morning, Fanny had carried herself with bravery, and Mrs. Clavering had been disposed to think that her daughter's heart was not wounded deeply. She had admitted the impossibility of her marriage with Mr. Saul, and had never insisted on the strength of her attachment. But no sooner was she told that Mr. Saul had been banished from the house, than she took upon herself to mope in the most love-lorn fashion, and behaved herself as though she were the victim of an all-absorbing passion. Between her and her father no word on the subject had been spoken, and even to her mother she was silent, respectful, and subdued, as it becomes daughters to be who are hardly used when they are in love. Now, Mrs. Clavering felt that in this her daughter was not treating her well.

WWhen Harry Clavering left London, he wasn’t feeling great, even though he didn’t want to admit to himself that he was ill. He had been so stressed by his situation, felt so ashamed of himself, and was still unable to see any way out of his misery, that he was exhausted and almost worn out from all the trouble. When he arrived at the parsonage, his mother immediately asked if he was sick, and he responded petulantly, which made her look dissatisfied. She suspected there was something wrong between him and Florence, but for now, she wasn’t inclined to dig into that. Harry’s romantic issues were a big deal for her, but right now, Fanny’s love life was her main concern. In fact, Fanny had become quite troublesome since Mr. Saul’s visit to her father. That evening after her chat with her mom, and the following morning, Fanny had acted bravely, leading Mrs. Clavering to think that her daughter wasn’t too hurt. She acknowledged that a marriage with Mr. Saul was impossible and never pushed Fanny to confess the depth of her feelings. But as soon as she learned that Mr. Saul had been kicked out of the house, Fanny dramatically started to act lovesick, behaving as if she was a victim of deep passion. Neither she nor her father had mentioned the issue, and even with her mother, she remained silent, respectful, and subdued, as daughters typically are when they feel mistreated while in love. Now, Mrs. Clavering felt that her daughter wasn’t being fair to her.

"But you don't mean to say that she cares for him?" Harry said to his mother, when they were alone on the evening of his arrival.

"But you can't be saying that she cares about him?" Harry asked his mother when they were alone on the evening he arrived.

"Yes, she cares for him, certainly. As far as I can tell, she cares for him very much."

"Yes, she definitely cares for him. From what I can see, she cares for him a lot."

"It is the oddest thing I ever knew in my life. I should have said he was the last man in the world for success of that kind."

"It’s the strangest thing I’ve ever known in my life. I should have said he was the last person in the world who would achieve that kind of success."

"One never can tell, Harry. You see he is a very good young man."

"One can never be sure, Harry. You see, he is a really good young man."

"But girls don't fall in love with men because they're good, mother."

"But girls don't fall in love with guys just because they're nice, Mom."

"I hope they do,—for that and other things together."

"I hope they do—for that and other reasons."

"But he has got none of the other things. What a pity it was that he was let to stay here after he first made a fool of himself."

"But he doesn't have any of those other qualities. What a shame he was allowed to stick around after he first embarrassed himself."

"It's too late to think of that now, Harry. Of course she can't marry him. They would have nothing to live on. I should say that he has no prospect of a living."

"It's too late to worry about that now, Harry. Obviously, she can't marry him. They wouldn't have anything to live on. I'd say he has no chance of making a living."

"I can't conceive how a man can do such a wicked thing," said Harry, moralizing, and forgetting for a moment his own sins. "Coming into a house like this, and in such a position, and then undermining a girl's affections, when he must know that it is quite out of the question that he should marry her! I call it downright wicked. It is treachery of the worst sort, and coming from a clergyman is of course the more to be condemned. I shan't be slow to tell him my mind."

"I can't understand how a guy can do something so awful," said Harry, lecturing and momentarily forgetting his own mistakes. "Entering a house like this, in such a position, and then messing with a girl's feelings, when he knows there's no chance he could ever marry her! I think it's just plain wrong. It's betrayal of the worst kind, and coming from a clergyman makes it even more unacceptable. I won’t hesitate to share my thoughts with him."

"You will gain nothing by quarrelling with him."

"You won't gain anything by arguing with him."

"But how can I help it, if I am to see him at all?"

"But how can I help it if I’m going to see him at all?"

"I mean that I would not be rough with him. The great thing is to make him feel that he should go away as soon as possible, and renounce all idea of seeing Fanny again. You see, your father will have no conversation with him at all, and it is so disagreeable about the services. They'll have to meet in the vestry-room on Sunday, and they won't speak. Will not that be terrible? Anything will be better than that he should remain here."

"I mean that I wouldn't be harsh with him. The key is to make him feel like he should leave as soon as he can and give up any thought of seeing Fanny again. You see, your father won't talk to him at all, and it's really awkward about the services. They'll have to meet in the vestry-room on Sunday, and they won't say a word to each other. Won't that be awful? Anything would be better than him sticking around."

"And what will my father do for a curate?"

"And what will my dad do for a curate?"

"He can't do anything till he knows when Mr. Saul will go. He talks of taking all the services himself."

"He can't do anything until he knows when Mr. Saul is leaving. He mentions taking all the services on himself."

"He couldn't do it, mother. He must not think of it. However, I'll see Saul the first thing to-morrow."

"He can't do it, mom. He shouldn't think about it. But I'll talk to Saul first thing tomorrow."

The next day was Tuesday, and Harry proposed to leave the rectory at ten o'clock for Mr. Saul's lodgings. Before he did so, he had a few words with his father, who professed even deeper animosity against Mr. Saul than his son. "After that," he said, "I'll believe that a girl may fall in love with any man! People say all manner of things about the folly of girls; but nothing but this,—nothing short of this,—would have convinced me that it was possible that Fanny should have been such a fool. An ape of a fellow,—not made like a man,—with a thin hatchet face, and unwholesome stubbly chin. Good heavens!"

The next day was Tuesday, and Harry suggested leaving the rectory at ten o'clock for Mr. Saul's place. Before he left, he had a few words with his father, who showed even more dislike for Mr. Saul than his son did. "After this," he said, "I'll believe a girl can fall for any guy! People talk a lot about how foolish girls can be; but nothing but this—nothing less than this—would have convinced me that Fanny could have been so naïve. That guy is a complete show-off—not even a proper man—with a narrow, sharp face and a gross, stubbly chin. Good grief!"

"He has talked her into it."

"He convinced her to do it."

"But he is such an ass. As far as I know him, he can't say Bo! to a goose."

"But he's such a jerk. As far as I know him, he can't even say boo to a goose."

"There I think you are perhaps wrong."

"There, I think you might be mistaken."

"Upon my word, I've never been able to get a word from him except about the parish. He is the most uncompanionable fellow. There's Edward Fielding is as active a clergyman as Saul; but Edward Fielding has something to say for himself."

"Honestly, I've never been able to get a word out of him other than about the parish. He's the most unfriendly guy. Edward Fielding, on the other hand, is as energetic a clergyman as Saul; but Edward Fielding has something meaningful to share."

"Saul is a cleverer man than Edward is; but his cleverness is of a different sort."

"Saul is smarter than Edward; however, his intelligence is of a different kind."

"It is of a sort that is very invisible to me. But what does all that matter? He hasn't got a shilling. When I was a curate, we didn't think of doing such things as that." Mr. Clavering had only been a curate for twelve months, and during that time had become engaged to his present wife with the consent of every one concerned. "But clergymen were gentlemen then. I don't know what the Church will come to; I don't indeed."

"It’s the kind of thing I can't see at all. But who cares? He doesn’t have a penny. When I was a curate, we never thought about doing stuff like that." Mr. Clavering had only been a curate for a year, and in that time, he had gotten engaged to his current wife with everyone's approval. "But clergymen were gentlemen back then. I really don’t know what the Church is coming to; I honestly don’t."

After this Harry went away upon his mission. What a farce it was that he should be engaged to make straight the affairs of other people, when his own affairs were so very crooked! As he walked up to the old farmhouse in which Mr. Saul was living, he thought of this, and acknowledged to himself that he could hardly make himself in earnest about his sister's affairs, because of his own troubles. He tried to fill himself with a proper feeling of dignified wrath and high paternal indignation against the poor curate; but under it all, and at the back of it all, and in front of it all, there was ever present to him his own position. Did he wish to escape from Lady Ongar; and if so, how was he to do it? And if he did not escape from Lady Ongar, how was he ever to hold up his head again?

After this, Harry set off on his mission. What a joke it was that he was supposed to fix other people's problems when his own life was such a mess! As he walked up to the old farmhouse where Mr. Saul was living, he thought about this and acknowledged that he could hardly focus on his sister's issues because of his own troubles. He tried to summon a feeling of dignified anger and strong paternal outrage against the poor curate, but through it all, and behind it all, and in front of it all, his own situation was always on his mind. Did he want to get away from Lady Ongar? And if he did, how could he manage it? And if he didn’t get away from Lady Ongar, how could he ever hold his head high again?

He had sent a note to Mr. Saul on the previous evening giving notice of his intended visit, and had received an answer, in which the curate had promised that he would be at home. He had never before been in Mr. Saul's room, and as he entered it, felt more strongly than ever how incongruous was the idea of Mr. Saul as a suitor to his sister. The Claverings had always had things comfortable around them. They were a people who had ever lived on Brussels carpets, and had seated themselves in capacious chairs. Ormolu, damask hangings, and Sevres china were not familiar to them; but they had never lacked anything that is needed for the comfort of the first-class clerical world. Mr. Saul in his abode boasted but few comforts. He inhabited a big bed-room, in which there was a vast fireplace and a very small grate,—the grate being very much more modern than the fireplace. There was a small rag of a carpet near the hearth, and on this stood a large deal table,—a table made of unalloyed deal, without any mendacious paint, putting forward a pretence in the direction of mahogany. One wooden Windsor arm-chair—very comfortable in its way—was appropriated to the use of Mr. Saul himself, and two other small wooden chairs flanked the other side of the fireplace. In one distant corner stood Mr. Saul's small bed, and in another distant corner stood his small dressing-table. Against the wall stood a rickety deal press in which he kept his clothes. Other furniture there was none. One of the large windows facing towards the farmyard had been permanently closed, and in the wide embrasure was placed a portion of Mr. Saul's library,—books which he had brought with him from college; and on the ground under this closed window were arranged the others, making a long row, which stretched from the bed to the dressing-table, very pervious, I fear, to the attacks of mice. The big table near the fireplace was covered with books and papers,—and, alas, with dust; for he had fallen into that terrible habit which prevails among bachelors, of allowing his work to remain ever open, never finished, always confused,—with papers above books, and books above papers,—looking as though no useful product could ever be made to come forth from such chaotic elements. But there Mr. Saul composed his sermons, and studied his Bible, and followed up, no doubt, some special darling pursuit which his ambition dictated. But there he did not eat his meals; that had been made impossible by the pile of papers and dust; and his chop, therefore, or his broiled rasher, or bit of pig's fry was deposited for him on the little dressing-table, and there consumed.

He sent a note to Mr. Saul the night before, letting him know about his planned visit, and got a reply where the curate promised he would be home. He had never been in Mr. Saul's room before, and as he walked in, he felt even more strongly how odd it was to think of Mr. Saul as a potential match for his sister. The Claverings had always kept things comfortable. They were a family used to plush Brussels carpets and roomy chairs. Ormolu, damask drapes, and Sevres china were unfamiliar to them, but they had always had everything needed for the comfort of the upper-class clerical lifestyle. Mr. Saul's place had few comforts. He lived in a large bedroom with a huge fireplace and a very small grate—the grate being much more modern than the fireplace. There was a tattered carpet near the hearth, and on it stood a large plain table made from solid wood, without any fake paint pretending to be mahogany. One wooden Windsor armchair—pretty comfortable in its own right—was reserved for Mr. Saul, and two smaller wooden chairs sat on the other side of the fireplace. In one corner was Mr. Saul's small bed, and in another was his tiny dressing table. Against the wall stood a rickety wood wardrobe where he kept his clothes. There wasn't any other furniture. One of the large windows facing the farmyard had been permanently boarded up, and in the wide window nook was part of Mr. Saul's library—books he had brought from college; and on the floor beneath this closed window were the other books, lined up in a long row stretching from the bed to the dressing table, likely very inviting to mice. The big table near the fireplace was cluttered with books and papers—and unfortunately, dust; for he had fallen into the terrible bachelor habit of leaving his work open, never finished, always messy—with papers on top of books and books on top of papers—looking like no useful result could ever come from such chaos. But that was where Mr. Saul wrote his sermons, studied his Bible, and probably pursued some personal interest his ambition dictated. But he didn't eat his meals there; that was impossible due to the pile of papers and dust; so his chop, or broiled bacon, or bit of fried meat was placed on the small dressing table, where he would eat.

Such was the solitary apartment of the gentleman who now aspired to the hand of Miss Clavering; and for this accommodation, including attendance, he paid the reasonable sum of £10 per annum. He then had £60 left, with which to feed himself, clothe himself like a gentleman,—a duty somewhat neglected,—and perform his charities!

Such was the lonely apartment of the man who now sought the hand of Miss Clavering; and for this place, including service, he paid the reasonable amount of £10 a year. He then had £60 left to feed himself, dress like a gentleman—something he somewhat neglected—and make his charitable contributions!

Harry Clavering, as he looked around him, felt almost ashamed of his sister. The walls were whitewashed, and stained in many places; and the floor in the middle of the room seemed to be very rotten. What young man who has himself dwelt ever in comfort would like such a house for his sister? Mr. Saul, however, came forward with no marks of visible shame on his face, and greeted his visitor frankly with an open hand. "You came down from London yesterday, I suppose?" said Mr. Saul.

Harry Clavering, as he looked around, felt a bit embarrassed about his sister. The walls were whitewashed and stained in numerous spots, and the floor in the middle of the room looked pretty rotten. What young man who has lived comfortably would want such a house for his sister? Mr. Saul, however, approached without any sign of shame and greeted his visitor warmly with an open hand. "You came down from London yesterday, I assume?" Mr. Saul said.

"Just so," said Harry.

"Exactly," said Harry.

"Take a seat;" and Mr. Saul suggested the arm-chair, but Harry contented himself with one of the others. "I hope Mrs. Clavering is well?" "Quite well," said Harry, cheerfully. "And your father,—and sister?" "Quite well, thank you," said Harry, very stiffly. "I would have come down to you at the rectory," said Mr. Saul, "instead of bringing you up here; only, as you have heard, no doubt, I and your father have unfortunately had a difference." This Mr. Saul said without any apparent effort, and then left Harry to commence the further conversation.

"Have a seat," Mr. Saul suggested the armchair, but Harry chose one of the other chairs. "I hope Mrs. Clavering is doing well?" "She's doing great," Harry replied cheerfully. "And how about your father and sister?" "They're both well, thanks," Harry said somewhat stiffly. "I would have come to see you at the rectory," Mr. Saul continued, "instead of bringing you up here; but as you might have heard, your father and I have unfortunately had a disagreement." Mr. Saul said this effortlessly and then left Harry to continue the conversation.

"Of course, you know what I'm come here about?" said Harry.

"Of course, you know why I’m here?" said Harry.

"Not exactly; at any rate not so clearly but what I would wish you to tell me."

"Not exactly; at least not as clearly as I would like you to tell me."

"You have gone to my father as a suitor for my sister's hand."

"You’ve approached my dad to ask for my sister’s hand in marriage."

"Yes, I have."

"Yep, I have."

"Now you must know that that is altogether impossible,—a thing not to be even talked of."

"Now you should know that this is completely impossible—something that shouldn't even be discussed."

"So your father says. I need not tell you that I was very sorry to hear him speak in that way."

"So your father says. I don’t need to tell you that I was really sorry to hear him talk like that."

"But, my dear fellow, you can't really be in earnest? You can't suppose it possible that he would allow such an engagement?"

"But, my dear friend, you can’t be serious, right? You can’t actually think he would let such an engagement happen?"

"As to the latter question, I have no answer to give; but I certainly was,—and certainly am in earnest."

"As for the latter question, I have no answer; but I definitely was—and still am—serious."

"Then I must say that I think you have a very erroneous idea of what the conduct of a gentleman should be."

"Then I have to say that I think you have a very mistaken idea of how a gentleman should act."

"Stop a moment, Clavering," said Mr. Saul, rising, and standing with his back to the big fireplace. "Don't allow yourself to say in a hurry words which you will afterwards regret. I do not think you can have intended to come here and tell me that I am not a gentleman."

"Hold on a second, Clavering," said Mr. Saul, getting up and facing the large fireplace. "Don’t rush into saying things you might regret later. I really don’t think you meant to come here and say that I’m not a gentleman."

"I don't want to have an argument with you; but you must give it up; that's all."

"I don't want to argue with you, but you need to let it go; that's it."

"Give what up? If you mean give up your sister, I certainly shall never do that. She may give me up, and if you have anything to say on that head, you had better say it to her."

"Give what up? If you're talking about giving up my sister, I definitely won’t do that. She might give me up, and if you have anything to say about that, you should say it to her."

"What right can you have,—without a shilling in the world—?"

"What right do you have—without a dime in the world—?"

"I should have no right to marry her in such a condition,—with your father's consent or without it. It is a thing which I have never proposed to myself for a moment,—or to her."

"I shouldn’t have any right to marry her in this situation—whether your father agrees or not. It’s something I've never even considered for a second—nor has she."

"And what have you proposed to yourself?"

"And what have you decided for yourself?"

Mr. Saul paused a moment before he spoke, looking down at the dusty heaps upon his table, as though hoping that inspiration might come to him from them. "I will tell you what I have proposed," said he at last, "as nearly as I can put it into words. I propose to myself to have the image in my heart of one human being whom I can love above all the world beside; I propose to hope that I, as others, may some day marry, and that she whom I so love may become my wife; I propose to bear with such courage as I can much certain delay, and probable absolute failure in all this; and I propose also to expect,—no, hardly to expect,—that that which I will do for her, she will do for me. Now you know all my mind, and you may be sure of this, that I will instigate your sister to no disobedience."

Mr. Saul paused for a moment before speaking, looking down at the dusty piles on his table, as if he hoped to find inspiration in them. "I'll share what I’m proposing," he finally said, "as best as I can express it. I plan to keep in my heart the image of one person I can love more than anyone else in the world; I hope that I, like others, might someday get married, and that the person I love will become my wife; I’m prepared to face with as much courage as I can the long wait and likely total failure in all of this; and I also intend to expect—no, maybe not expect—that what I do for her, she will do for me. Now you know exactly what I'm thinking, and you can be sure of this: I will not encourage your sister to disobey.”

"Of course she will not see you again."

"Of course she won't see you again."

"I shall think that hard after what has passed between us; but I certainly shall not endeavour to see her clandestinely."

"I will seriously think about everything that has happened between us; but I definitely won’t try to see her secretly."

"And under these circumstances, Mr. Saul, of course you must leave us."

"And with all that going on, Mr. Saul, you definitely have to go."

"So your father says."

"That's what your dad says."

"But leave us at once, I mean. It cannot be comfortable that you and my father should go on in the parish together in this way."

"But please, leave us right now. It can't be comfortable for you and my father to be here together in the parish like this."

"What does your father mean by 'at once'?"

"What does your dad mean by 'right away'?"

"The sooner the better; say in two months' time at furthest."

"The sooner, the better; let’s say in two months at the latest."

"Very well. I will go in two months' time. I have no other home to go to, and no other means of livelihood; but as your father wishes it, I will go at the end of two months. As I comply with this, I hope my request to see your sister once before I go will not be refused."

"Alright. I'll leave in two months. I don’t have any other place to go or any way to support myself; but since your father wants this, I’ll go in two months. As I do this, I hope you won't deny my request to see your sister once before I leave."

"It could do no good, Mr. Saul."

"It won't help, Mr. Saul."

"To me it would do great good,—and, as I think, no harm to her."

"To me, it would be very beneficial—and, as I believe, it wouldn't harm her at all."

"My father, I am sure, will not allow it. Indeed, why should he? Nor, as I understand, would my sister wish it."

"My dad, I'm sure, won't allow it. In fact, why would he? Also, as I understand it, my sister wouldn't want that either."

"Has she said so?"

"Did she say that?"

"Not to me; but she has acknowledged that any idea of a marriage between herself and you is quite impossible, and after that I'm sure she'll have too much sense to wish for an interview. If there is anything further that I can do for you, I shall be most happy." Mr. Saul did not see that Harry Clavering could do anything for him, and then Harry took his leave. The rector, when he heard of the arrangement, expressed himself as in some sort satisfied. One month would have been better than two, but then it could hardly be expected that Mr. Saul could take himself away instantly, without looking for a hole in which to lay his head. "Of course it is understood that he is not to see her?" the rector said. In answer to this, Harry explained what had taken place, expressing his opinion that Mr. Saul would, at any rate, keep his word. "Interview, indeed!" said the rector. "It is the man's audacity that most astonishes me. It passes me to think how such a fellow can dare to propose such a thing. What is it that he expects as the end of it?" Then Harry endeavoured to repeat what Mr. Saul had said as to his own expectations, but he was quite aware that he failed to make his father understand those expectations as he had understood them when the words came from Mr. Saul's own mouth. Harry Clavering had acknowledged to himself that it was impossible not to respect the poor curate.

"Not for me; but she has admitted that any idea of a marriage between her and you is completely out of the question, and after that, I’m sure she’ll be smart enough not to want a meeting. If there’s anything else I can do for you, I’d be more than happy to help." Mr. Saul didn’t see how Harry Clavering could assist him, and then Harry took his leave. When the rector learned about the arrangement, he seemed somewhat satisfied. One month would have been better than two, but then it was hardly reasonable to expect Mr. Saul to leave right away without finding a place to stay. "Of course, it's understood that he isn't to see her?" the rector asked. In response, Harry explained what had happened, sharing his belief that Mr. Saul would, in any case, keep his promise. "Interview, indeed!" said the rector. "It’s the man’s nerve that surprises me the most. I can't believe someone like him would dare to suggest such a thing. What does he think will come of it?" Then Harry tried to convey what Mr. Saul had said regarding his own expectations, but he knew he wasn’t quite able to make his father grasp those expectations as he had understood them when they came from Mr. Saul himself. Harry Clavering had admitted to himself that it was impossible not to respect the poor curate.

To Mrs. Clavering, of course, fell the task of explaining to Fanny what had been done, and what was going to be done. "He is to go away, my dear, at the end of two months."

To Mrs. Clavering, of course, came the job of explaining to Fanny what had happened and what was going to happen. "He's going to leave, my dear, at the end of two months."

"Very well, mamma."

"Sure thing, mom."

"And, of course, you and he are not to meet before that."

"And, of course, you two are not supposed to meet before that."

"Of course not, if you and papa say so."

"Of course not, if you and Dad say so."

"I have told your papa that it will only be necessary to tell you this, and that then you can go to your school just as usual, if you please. Neither papa nor I would doubt your word for a moment."

"I've told your dad that all you need to do is hear this, and then you can go to school just like you normally do, if that's okay with you. Neither your dad nor I would doubt what you say at all."

"But what can I do if he comes to me?" asked Fanny, almost whimpering.

"But what am I supposed to do if he comes to me?" asked Fanny, almost crying.

"He has said that he will not, and we do not doubt his word either."

"He said he won't, and we don't doubt him either."

"That I am sure you need not. Whatever anybody may say, Mr. Saul is as much a gentleman as though he had the best living in the diocese. No one ever knew him break his word,—not a hair's breadth,—or do—anything else—that he ought—not to do." And Fanny, as she pronounced this rather strong eulogium, began to sob. Mrs. Clavering felt that Fanny was headstrong, and almost ill-natured, in speaking in this tone of her lover, after the manner in which she had been treated; but there could be no use in discussing Mr. Saul's virtues, and therefore she let the matter drop. "If you will take my advice," she said, "you will go about your occupations just as usual. You'll soon recover your spirits in that way."

"That I'm sure you don't need to. No matter what anyone says, Mr. Saul is just as much a gentleman as if he had the best position in the diocese. No one has ever seen him break his word—not even a little—or do anything he shouldn't do." As she said this rather strong praise, Fanny started to cry. Mrs. Clavering felt that Fanny was being stubborn and a bit mean in talking about her boyfriend like that, given how he had treated her; but there was no point in discussing Mr. Saul's qualities, so she decided to drop it. "If you take my advice," she said, "you'll go about your usual activities. You'll quickly feel better that way."

"I don't want to recover my spirits," said Fanny; "but if you wish it I'll go on with the schools."

"I don't want to feel better," Fanny said; "but if you want me to, I'll keep going with the schools."

It was quite manifest now that Fanny intended to play the role of a broken-hearted young lady, and to regard the absent Mr. Saul with passionate devotion. That this should be so Mrs. Clavering felt to be the more cruel, because no such tendencies had been shown before the paternal sentence against Mr. Saul had been passed. Fanny in telling her own tale had begun by declaring that any such an engagement was an impossibility. She had not asked permission to have Mr. Saul for a lover. She had given no hint that she even hoped for such permission. But now when that was done which she herself had almost dictated, she took upon herself to live as though she were ill-used as badly as a heroine in a castle among the Apennines! And in this way she would really become deeply in love with Mr. Saul;—thinking of all which Mrs. Clavering almost regretted that the edict of banishment had gone forth. It would, perhaps, have been better to have left Mr. Saul to go about the parish, and to have laughed Fanny out of her fancy. But it was too late now for that, and Mrs. Clavering said nothing further on the subject to any one.

It was now obvious that Fanny intended to play the role of a heartbroken young woman, devotedly pining for the missing Mr. Saul. Mrs. Clavering found this particularly cruel since Fanny hadn’t shown any such inclinations before the fatherly decision about Mr. Saul was made. When Fanny shared her own story, she had started by saying that any engagement was out of the question. She hadn’t asked for permission to have Mr. Saul as a lover, nor had she hinted that she even hoped for such approval. But now, after the very decision she had almost influenced, she took it upon herself to act as if she were suffering as badly as a heroine trapped in a castle in the Apennines! In this way, she would likely fall deeply in love with Mr. Saul;—thinking about all this made Mrs. Clavering almost wish the banishment hadn’t been issued. It might have been better to let Mr. Saul roam through the parish and laugh Fanny out of her infatuation. But it was too late for that now, and Mrs. Clavering said nothing more about it to anyone.

On the day following his visit to the farm house, Harry Clavering was unwell,—too unwell to go back to London; and on the next day he was ill in bed. Then it was that he got his mother to write to Mrs. Burton;—and then also he told his mother a part of his troubles. When the letter was written he was very anxious to see it, and was desirous that it should be specially worded, and so written as to make Mrs. Burton certain that he was in truth too ill to come to London, though not ill enough to create alarm. "Why not simply let me say that you are kept here for a day or two?" asked Mrs. Clavering.

On the day after his visit to the farmhouse, Harry Clavering felt unwell—too unwell to return to London; and the following day he was stuck in bed with an illness. That's when he got his mom to write to Mrs. Burton; and he also shared some of his troubles with her. Once the letter was written, he was eager to see it and wanted it to be worded just right so that Mrs. Burton would be convinced he was really too sick to go back to London, but not sick enough to cause concern. "Why not just let me say that you’re stuck here for a day or two?" Mrs. Clavering suggested.

"Because I promised that I would be in Onslow Terrace to-morrow, and she must not think that I would stay away if I could avoid it."

"Because I promised that I would be at Onslow Terrace tomorrow, and she shouldn’t think that I would stay away if I could help it."

Then Mrs. Clavering closed the letter and directed it. When she had done that, and put on it the postage-stamp, she asked in a voice that was intended to be indifferent whether Florence was in London; and, hearing that she was so, expressed her surprise that the letter should not be written to Florence.

Then Mrs. Clavering closed the letter and addressed it. After doing that and putting a stamp on it, she asked in a voice that was meant to sound casual whether Florence was in London; and, upon hearing that she was, expressed her surprise that the letter wasn't written to Florence.

"My engagement was with Mrs. Burton," said Harry.

"My engagement was with Mrs. Burton," Harry said.

"I hope there is nothing wrong between you and Florence?" said his mother. To this question Harry made no immediate answer, and Mrs. Clavering was afraid to press it. But after a while he recurred to the subject himself. "Mother," he said, "things are wrong between Florence and me."

"I hope there’s nothing going on between you and Florence?" his mother asked. Harry didn’t respond right away, and Mrs. Clavering didn’t want to push it. But after a while, he brought it up again. "Mom," he said, "things are not good between Florence and me."

"Oh, Harry;—what has she done?"

"Oh, Harry—what did she do?"

"It is rather what have I done! As for her, she has simply trusted herself to a man who has been false to her."

"It’s more about what I’ve done! As for her, she just put her trust in a man who has been unfaithful to her."

"Dear Harry, do not say that. What is it that you mean? It is not true about Lady Ongar?"

"Dear Harry, don't say that. What do you mean? Is it true about Lady Ongar?"

"Then you have heard, mother. Of course I do not know what you have heard, but it can hardly be worse than the truth. But you must not blame her. Whatever fault there may be, is all mine." Then he told her much of what had occurred in Bolton Street. We may suppose that he said nothing of that mad caress,—nothing, perhaps, of the final promise which he made to Julia as he last passed out of her presence; but he did give her to understand that he had in some way returned to his old passion for the woman whom he had first loved.

"Then you’ve heard, Mom. I don’t know what you’ve heard, but it’s probably not worse than the truth. But don’t blame her. Whatever mistakes there are, they’re all mine." Then he shared a lot of what had happened on Bolton Street. We can guess he didn’t mention that crazy moment of affection—maybe he didn’t even talk about the final promise he made to Julia when he last left her; but he did let her know that he had somehow fallen back into his old feelings for the woman he had loved first.

I should describe Mrs. Clavering in language too highly eulogistic were I to lead the reader to believe that she was altogether averse to such advantages as would accrue to her son from a marriage so brilliant as that which he might now make with the grandly dowered widow of the late earl. Mrs. Clavering by no means despised worldly goods; and she had, moreover, an idea that her highly gifted son was better adapted to the spending than to the making of money. It had come to be believed at the rectory that though Harry had worked very hard at college,—as is the case with many highly born young gentlemen,—and though he would, undoubtedly, continue to work hard if he were thrown among congenial occupations,—such as politics and the like,—nevertheless, he would never excel greatly in any drudgery that would be necessary for the making of money. There had been something to be proud of in this, but there had, of course, been more to regret. But now if Harry were to marry Lady Ongar, all trouble on that score would be over. But poor Florence! When Mrs. Clavering allowed herself to think of the matter she knew that Florence's claims should be held as paramount. And when she thought further and thought seriously, she knew also that Harry's honour and Harry's happiness demanded that he should be true to the girl to whom his hand had been promised. And, then, was not Lady Ongar's name tainted? It might be that she had suffered cruel ill-usage in this. It might be that no such taint had been deserved. Mrs. Clavering could plead the injured woman's cause when speaking of it without any close reference to her own belongings; but it would have been very grievous to her, even had there been no Florence Burton in the case, that her son should make his fortune by marrying a woman as to whose character the world was in doubt.

I should describe Mrs. Clavering in a way that might lead you to think she completely opposed the benefits her son could gain from a marriage as advantageous as the one he could have with the wealthy widow of the late earl. Mrs. Clavering didn’t shy away from material wealth; in fact, she believed her exceptionally talented son was better suited for spending money than making it. At the rectory, it had become a common belief that while Harry worked very hard at college—like many privileged young men—and would likely continue to work hard in activities he enjoyed, such as politics, he would never truly excel in the grind necessary to earn a living. There was some pride in this, but, of course, much more regret. However, if Harry were to marry Lady Ongar, all concerns about money would be resolved. But poor Florence! When Mrs. Clavering thought about it, she recognized that Florence's interests should be the priority. And when she reflected more deeply, she understood that Harry's integrity and happiness required him to stay true to the girl to whom he was already engaged. Moreover, wasn’t Lady Ongar’s reputation questionable? It could be that she had been unjustly wronged, or perhaps her reputation was undeservedly tarnished. Mrs. Clavering could advocate for the injured woman when discussing the issue without making it personal; but it would still painful for her, even without Florence Burton in the picture, for her son to achieve success through a marriage to someone whose character was in question.

She came to him late in the evening when his sister and father had just left him, and sitting with her hand upon his, spoke one word, which perhaps had more weight with Harry than any word that had yet been spoken. "Have you slept, dear?" she said.

She came to him late at night after his sister and dad had just left, and with her hand on his, she said one word that probably meant more to Harry than anything else that had been said before. "Have you slept, dear?" she asked.

"A little before my father came in."

"A little before my dad walked in."

"My darling," she said,—"you will be true to Florence; will you not?" Then there was a pause. "My own Harry, tell me that you will be true where your truth is due."

"My darling," she said, "you will be loyal to Florence, won't you?" Then there was a pause. "My own Harry, promise me that you will be honest where it matters."

"I will, mother," he said.

"I will, Mom," he said.

"My own boy; my darling boy; my own true gentleman!" Harry felt that he did not deserve the praise; but praise undeserved, though it may be satire in disguise, is often very useful.

"My own boy; my darling boy; my true gentleman!" Harry felt he didn’t deserve the praise; but undeserved praise, even if it’s sarcasm in disguise, can often be really helpful.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXV.

PARTING.

On the next day Harry was not better, but the doctor still said that there was no cause for alarm. He was suffering from a low fever, and his sister had better be kept out of his room. He would not sleep, and was restless, and it might be some time before he could return to London.

On the next day, Harry was still not doing well, but the doctor said there was no reason to worry. He had a mild fever, and his sister should stay out of his room. He couldn't sleep and was really restless, and it might be a while before he could go back to London.

Early in the day the rector came into his son's bedroom, and told him and his mother, who was there, the news which he had just heard from the great house. "Hugh has come home," he said, "and is going out yachting for the rest of the summer. They are going to Norway in Jack Stuart's yacht. Archie is going with them." Now Archie was known to be a great man in a yacht, cognizant of ropes, well up in booms and spars, very intimate with bolts, and one to whose hands a tiller came as naturally as did the saddle of a steeple-chase horse to the legs of his friend Doodles. "They are going to fish," said the rector.

Early in the day, the rector walked into his son's bedroom and informed him and his mother, who was present, about the news he had just received from the big house. "Hugh is back," he said, "and he’s going yachting for the rest of the summer. They’re heading to Norway on Jack Stuart's yacht. Archie is going with them." Now, Archie was known to be skilled on a yacht, familiar with ropes, knowledgeable about booms and spars, well-acquainted with bolts, and handling a tiller came to him as easily as it did to his friend Doodles when riding a steeplechase horse. "They are going to fish," the rector added.

"But Jack Stuart's yacht is only a river-boat,—or just big enough for Cowes harbour, but nothing more," said Harry, roused in his bed to some excitement by the news.

"But Jack Stuart's yacht is just a riverboat—just big enough for Cowes harbor, but nothing more," said Harry, waking up in his bed, stirred by the news.

"I know nothing about Jack Stuart or his boat either," said the rector; "but that's what they told me. He's down here, at any rate, for I saw the servant that came with him."

"I don't know anything about Jack Stuart or his boat either," said the rector; "but that's what I was told. He's definitely down here because I saw the servant who came with him."

"What a shame it is," said Mrs. Clavering,—"a scandalous shame."

"What a shame it is," said Mrs. Clavering, "a really scandalous shame."

"You mean his going away?" said the rector.

"You mean he’s leaving?" said the rector.

"Of course I do;—his leaving her here by herself, all alone. He can have no heart;—after losing her child and suffering as she has done. It makes me ashamed of my own name."

"Of course I do;—his leaving her here by herself, all alone. He must have no heart;—after losing her child and suffering as she has. It makes me embarrassed about my own name."

"You can't alter him, my dear. He has his good qualities and his bad,—and the bad ones are by far the more conspicuous."

"You can't change him, my dear. He has his good qualities and his bad ones—and the bad ones stand out much more."

"I don't know any good qualities he has."

"I don't know any good qualities he has."

"He does not get into debt. He will not destroy the property. He will leave the family after him as well off as it was before him,—and though he is a hard man, he does nothing actively cruel. Think of Lord Ongar, and then you'll remember that there are worse men than Hugh. Not that I like him. I am never comfortable for a moment in his presence. I always feel that he wants to quarrel with me, and that I almost want to quarrel with him."

"He doesn’t go into debt. He won’t ruin the property. He’ll leave the family just as well off as it was before him, and even though he’s a tough guy, he doesn’t do anything actively cruel. Think of Lord Ongar, and you’ll remember that there are worse people than Hugh. Not that I like him. I never feel comfortable around him. I always get the sense that he wants to pick a fight with me, and honestly, I almost want to fight back."

"I detest him," said Harry, from beneath the bedclothes.

"I can't stand him," said Harry, from under the blankets.

"You won't be troubled with him any more this summer, for he means to be off in less than a week."

"You won't have to deal with him anymore this summer because he plans to leave in less than a week."

"And what is she to do?" asked Mrs. Clavering.

"And what is she supposed to do?" asked Mrs. Clavering.

"Live here as she has done ever since Julia married. I don't see that it will make much difference to her. He's never with her when he's in England, and I should think she must be more comfortable without him than with him."

"She has lived here ever since Julia got married. I don't think it will make much difference to her. He’s never around when he’s in England, and I would guess she’s probably more comfortable without him than with him."

"It's a great catch for Archie," said Harry.

"It's a great catch for Archie," Harry said.

"Archie Clavering is a fool," said Mrs. Clavering.

"Archie Clavering is an idiot," said Mrs. Clavering.

"They say he understands a yacht," said the rector, who then left the room.

"They say he knows about yachts," said the rector, who then left the room.

The rector's news was all true. Sir Hugh Clavering had come down to the Park, and had announced his intention of going to Norway in Jack Stuart's yacht. Archie also had been invited to join the party. Sir Hugh intended to leave the Thames in about a week, and had not thought it necessary to give his wife any intimation of the fact, till he told her himself of his intention. He took, I think, a delight in being thus over-harsh in his harshness to her. He proved to himself thus not only that he was master, but that he would be master without any let or drawback, without compunctions, and even without excuses for his ill-conduct. There should be no plea put in by him in his absences, that he had only gone to catch a few fish, when his intentions had been other than piscatorial. He intended to do as he liked now and always,—and he intended that his wife should know that such was his intention. She was now childless, and therefore he had no other terms to keep with her than those which appertained to her necessities for bed and board. There was the house, and she might live in it; and there were the butchers and the bakers, and other tradesmen to supply her wants. Nay;—there were the old carriage and the old horses at her disposal, if they could be of any service to her. Such were Sir Hugh Clavering's ideas as to the bonds inflicted upon him by his marriage vows.

The rector's news was all true. Sir Hugh Clavering had come down to the Park and announced his plan to go to Norway on Jack Stuart's yacht. Archie had also been invited to join the group. Sir Hugh planned to leave the Thames in about a week and didn’t feel it necessary to inform his wife until he told her directly. He seemed to take pleasure in being particularly harsh with her. By doing this, he was proving to himself that he was in control and that he would remain in control without any obstacles, guilt, or even justifications for his bad behavior. He wouldn’t give any excuses for his absences, pretending he was just going to catch a few fish when his true intentions were different. He planned to do what he wanted now and always—and he wanted his wife to know that. She was now without children, so he felt he only had to provide for her basic needs for shelter and food. There was the house, and she could live there; and there were the butchers, bakers, and other tradespeople to meet her needs. In fact, there was the old carriage and the old horses available to her if they could be of any use. Such were Sir Hugh Clavering's beliefs about the obligations imposed on him by his marriage vows.

"I'm going to Norway next week." It was thus Sir Hugh communicated his intention to his wife within five minutes of their first greeting.

"I'm going to Norway next week." That’s how Sir Hugh let his wife know his plans just five minutes after they first greeted each other.

"To Norway, Hugh?"

"Heading to Norway, Hugh?"

"Yes;—why not to Norway? I and one or two others have got some fishing there. Archie is going too. It will keep him from spending his money;—or rather from spending money which isn't his."

"Sure; why not go to Norway? A couple of us have some fishing there. Archie is going too. It’ll keep him from wasting his money—or more accurately, from wasting money that isn’t his."

"And for how long will you be gone?"

"And how long will you be gone?"

It was part of Sir Hugh Clavering's theory as to these matters that there should be no lying in the conduct of them. He would not condescend to screen any part of his doings by a falsehood;—so he answered this question with exact truth.

It was part of Sir Hugh Clavering's theory on these matters that there should be no dishonesty in how they were handled. He wouldn’t lower himself to cover any part of his actions with a lie; so he answered this question with complete honesty.

"I don't suppose we shall be back before October."

"I don’t think we’ll be back before October."

"Not before October?"

"Not until October?"

"No. We are talking of putting in on the coast of Normandy somewhere; and probably may run down to Brittany. I shall be back, at any rate, for the hunting. As for the partridges, the game has gone so much to the devil here, that they are not worth coming for."

"No. We're talking about setting it up somewhere along the coast of Normandy, and we might even head down to Brittany. I'll definitely be back for the hunting. As for the partridges, the game around here has gotten so bad that it's not even worth coming for."

"You'll be away four months!"

"You'll be gone for four months!"

"I suppose I shall if I don't come back till October." Then he left her, calculating that she would have considered the matter before he returned, and have decided that no good could come to her from complaint. She knew his purpose now, and would no doubt reconcile herself to it quickly;—perhaps with a few tears, which would not hurt him if he did not see them.

"I guess I will if I don't get back until October." Then he left her, figuring that she would have thought about it by the time he returned and would realize that complaining wouldn't help her. She understood his intentions now and would probably come to terms with it soon; maybe with a few tears, which wouldn't matter to him if he didn't see them.

But this blow was almost more than Lady Clavering could bear,—was more than she could bear in silence. Why she should have grudged her husband his trip abroad, seeing that his presence in England could hardly have been a solace to her, it is hard to understand. Had he remained in England, he would rarely have been at Clavering Park; and when he was at the Park he would rarely have given her the benefit of his society. When they were together he was usually scolding her, or else sitting in gloomy silence, as though that phase of his life was almost insupportable to him. He was so unusually disagreeable in his intercourse with her, that his absence, one would think, must be preferable to his presence. But women can bear anything better than desertion. Cruelty is bad, but neglect is worse than cruelty, and desertion worse even than neglect. To be treated as though she were not in existence, or as though her existence were a nuisance simply to be endured, and, as far as possible, to be forgotten, was more than even Lady Clavering could bear without complaint. When her husband left her, she sat meditating how she might turn against her oppressor. She was a woman not apt for fighting,—unlike her sister, who knew well how to use the cudgels in her own behalf; she was timid, not gifted with a full flow of words, prone to sink and become dependent; but she,—even she,—with all these deficiencies,—felt that she must make some stand against the outrage to which she was now to be subjected.

But this hit was almost more than Lady Clavering could handle—it was more than she could endure in silence. It's hard to understand why she would resent her husband’s trip abroad, considering that his presence in England couldn't have brought her much comfort. If he had stayed, he would rarely have been at Clavering Park, and when he was there, he wouldn't have spent much time with her. Whenever they were together, he usually either scolded her or sat in gloomy silence, as if that part of his life was nearly unbearable. He was so unpleasant in his interactions with her that you'd think his absence would be better than his presence. But women can tolerate anything better than abandonment. Cruelty is terrible, but neglect is worse than cruelty, and abandonment is worse than neglect. Being treated like she didn't exist, or like her existence was just an inconvenience to be put up with and, as much as possible, forgotten, was more than even Lady Clavering could accept without voicing her discontent. When her husband left her, she sat thinking about how she might stand up to her oppressor. She was not someone who was good at fighting—unlike her sister, who knew how to defend herself; she was timid, not very articulate, and tended to retreat and become reliant on others. Yet, even with all these shortcomings, she felt she had to take a stand against the mistreatment she was now facing.

"Hugh," she said, when next she saw him, "you can't really mean that you are going to leave me from this time till the winter?"

"Hugh," she said when she saw him next, "you can't seriously be saying that you're going to leave me from now until winter?"

"I said nothing about the winter."

"I didn't say anything about the winter."

"Well,—till October?"

"Well, until October?"

"I said that I was going, and I usually mean what I say."

"I said I was going, and I usually mean what I say."

"I cannot believe it, Hugh; I cannot bring myself to think that you will be so cruel."

"I can’t believe it, Hugh; I can't bring myself to think that you would be so cruel."

"Look here, Hermy, if you take to calling names I won't stand it."

"Listen up, Hermy, if you start calling me names, I won't put up with it."

"And I won't stand it, either. What am I to do? Am I to be here in this dreadful barrack of a house all alone? How would you like it? Would you bear it for one month, let alone four or five? I won't remain here; I tell you that fairly."

"And I won't put up with it, either. What am I supposed to do? Am I supposed to stay in this awful place all by myself? How would you feel about that? Would you manage it for a month, let alone four or five? I won't stay here; I'm being clear about that."

"Where do you want to go?"

"Where do you want to go?"

"I don't want to go anywhere, but I'll go away somewhere and die;—I will indeed. I'll destroy myself, or something."

"I don't want to go anywhere, but I'll leave and die somewhere;—I really will. I'll end it all, or something."

"Psha!"

"Psh!"

"Yes; of course it's a joke to you. What have I done to deserve this? Have I ever done anything that you told me not? It's all because of Hughy,—my darling,—so it is; and it's cruel of you, and not like a husband; and it's not manly. It's very cruel. I didn't think anybody would have been so cruel as you are to me." Then she broke down and burst into tears.

"Yeah, I guess it's just a joke to you. What did I do to deserve this? Have I ever done anything you told me not to? It's all because of Hughy—my darling—it really is; and it's cruel of you, not the way a husband should act; it’s just not manly. It’s really cruel. I didn’t think anyone could be as cruel to me as you are." Then she broke down and started crying.

"Have you done, Hermy?" said her husband.

"Are you done, Hermy?" her husband asked.

"No; I've not done."

"No, I haven't done that."

"Then go on again," said he.

"Then keep moving," he said.

But in truth she had done, and could only repeat her last accusation. "You're very, very cruel."

But in reality, she had done so, and could only echo her last accusation. "You're really, really cruel."

"You said that before."

"You said that already."

"And I'll say it again. I'll tell everybody; so I will. I'll tell your uncle at the rectory, and he shall speak to you."

"And I’ll say it again. I’ll tell everyone; I will. I’ll tell your uncle at the rectory, and he will talk to you."

"Look here, Hermy; I can bear a deal of nonsense from you because some women are given to talk nonsense; but if I find you telling tales about me out of this house, and especially to my uncle, or indeed to anybody, I'll let you know what it is to be cruel."

"Listen up, Hermy; I can put up with a lot of your nonsense because some women just like to talk crazily; but if I catch you spreading rumors about me outside of this house, especially to my uncle or anyone else, I'll show you what it means to be really cruel."

"You can't be worse than you are."

"You can’t be any worse than you are."

"Don't try me; that's all. And as I suppose you have now said all that you've got to say, if you please we will regard that subject as finished." The poor woman had said all that she could say, and had no further means of carrying on the war. In her thoughts she could do so; in her thoughts she could wander forth out of the gloomy house in the night, and perish in the damp and cold, leaving a paper behind her to tell the world that her husband's cruelty had brought her to that pass. Or she would go to Julia and leave him for ever. Julia, she thought, would still receive her. But as to one thing she had certainly made up her mind; she would go with her complaint to Mrs. Clavering at the rectory, let her lord and master show his anger in whatever form he might please.

"Don't test me; that's all. And since you’ve said everything you need to say, let’s just consider that topic done." The poor woman had said all she could, and she had no other way to continue the fight. In her mind, she could escape from the dark house at night and perish in the damp and cold, leaving behind a note to let the world know her husband's cruelty led her to that point. Or she could go to Julia and leave him for good. She believed Julia would still take her in. But one thing was certain: she had made up her mind to speak to Mrs. Clavering at the rectory, no matter how her husband decided to respond in anger.

The next day Sir Hugh himself made her a proposition which somewhat softened the aspect of affairs. This he did in his usual voice, with something of a smile on his face, and speaking as though he were altogether oblivious of the scenes of yesterday. "I was thinking, Hermy," he said, "that you might have Julia down here while I am away."

The next day, Sir Hugh approached her with a suggestion that eased the tension a bit. He spoke in his usual tone, with a slight smile, acting as if he had completely forgotten about yesterday's events. "I was thinking, Hermy," he said, "that you could have Julia come down here while I’m away."

"Have Julia here?"

"Is Julia here?"

"Yes; why not? She'll come, I'm sure, when she knows that my back is turned."

"Yeah; why not? She'll definitely come, I'm sure, once she knows I'm not watching."

"I've never thought about asking her,—at least not lately."

"I haven't thought about asking her—not recently."

"No; of course. But you might as well do so now. It seems that she never goes to Ongar Park, and, as far as I can learn, never will. I'm going to see her myself."

"No; of course not. But you might as well do it now. It looks like she never visits Ongar Park, and, from what I can gather, never will. I'm going to see her myself."

"You going to see her?"

"Are you going to see her?"

"Yes; Lord Ongar's people want to know whether she can be induced to give up the place; that is, to sell her interest in it. I have promised to see her. Do you write her a letter first, and tell her that I want to see her; and ask her also to come here as soon as she can leave London."

"Yes; Lord Ongar's people want to know if she can be persuaded to give up the property; that is, to sell her stake in it. I’ve promised to meet her. Could you write her a letter first, letting her know that I want to see her, and ask her to come here as soon as she can leave London?"

"But wouldn't the lawyers do it better than you?"

"But wouldn't the lawyers do it better than you?"

"Well;—one would think so; but I am commissioned to make her a kind of apology from the whole Courton family. They fancy they've been hard upon her; and, by George, I believe they have. I may be able to say a word for myself too. If she isn't a fool she'll put her anger in her pocket, and come down to you."

"Well;—you would think so; but I’ve been asked to give her a sort of apology from the entire Courton family. They believe they've treated her unfairly; and honestly, I think they have. I might have a thing or two to say for myself as well. If she’s not being unreasonable, she’ll set her anger aside and come over to you."

Lady Clavering liked the idea of having her sister with her, but she was not quite meek enough to receive the permission now given her as full compensation for the injury done. She said that she would do as he had bidden her, and then went back to her own grievances. "I don't suppose Julia, even if she would come for a little time, would find it very pleasant to live in such a place as this, all alone."

Lady Clavering liked the idea of having her sister around, but she wasn't quite submissive enough to take the permission she was just given as complete compensation for the hurt she'd experienced. She said she would do what he asked, and then returned to her own complaints. "I don't think Julia, even if she comes for a little while, would enjoy living in a place like this all by herself."

"She wouldn't be all alone when you are with her," said Hugh, gruffly, and then again went out, leaving his wife to become used to her misfortune by degrees.

"She won't be all alone when you’re with her," Hugh said gruffly, then left, allowing his wife to slowly adjust to her misfortune.

It was not surprising that Lady Clavering should dislike her solitude at Clavering Park house, nor surprising that Sir Hugh should find the place disagreeable. The house was a large, square, stone building, with none of the prettinesses of modern country-houses about it. The gardens were away from the house, and the cold desolate flat park came up close around the windows. The rooms were large and lofty,—very excellent for the purpose of a large household, but with nothing of that snug, pretty comfort which solitude requires for its solace. The furniture was old and heavy, and the hangings were dark in colour. Lady Clavering when alone there,—and she generally was alone,—never entered the rooms on the ground-floor. Nor did she ever pass through the wilderness of a hall by which the front-door was to be reached. Throughout more than half her days she never came downstairs at all; but when she did so, preparatory to being dragged about the parish lanes in the old family carriage, she was let out at a small side-door; and so it came to pass that during the absences of the lord of the mansion, the shutters were not even moved from any of the lower windows. Under such circumstances there can be no wonder that Lady Clavering regarded the place as a prison. "I wish you could come upon it unawares, and see how gloomy it is," she said to him. "I don't think you'd stand it alone for two days, let alone all your life."

It wasn't surprising that Lady Clavering disliked her solitude at Clavering Park house, nor that Sir Hugh found the place unpleasant. The house was a large, square stone building, lacking the charm of modern country houses. The gardens were far from the house, and the cold, barren park surrounded the windows. The rooms were spacious and high—a good fit for a large household—but they lacked the cozy comfort that solitude needs for comfort. The furniture was old and heavy, and the drapes were dark in color. When Lady Clavering was there alone—and she usually was—she never went into the rooms on the ground floor. She also never walked through the overgrown hall that led to the front door. For more than half her days, she never came downstairs. But when she did, getting ready to be taken around the parish lanes in the old family carriage, she was let out through a small side door. As a result, during the times when the lord of the mansion was away, the shutters on the lower windows weren't even opened. Under these conditions, it’s no wonder Lady Clavering saw the place as a prison. "I wish you could stumble upon it unexpectedly and see how gloomy it is," she told him. "I don't think you could handle it alone for two days, let alone for your entire life."

"I'll shut it up altogether if you like," said he.

"I'll close it completely if you'd like," he said.

"And where am I to go?" she asked.

"And where am I supposed to go?" she asked.

"You can go to Moor Hall if you please." Now Moor Hall was a small house, standing on a small property belonging to Sir Hugh, in that part of Devonshire which lies north of Dartmoor, somewhere near the Holsworthy region, and which is perhaps as ugly, as desolate, and as remote as any part of England. Lady Clavering had heard much of Moor Hall, and dreaded it as the heroine, made to live in the big grim castle low down among the Apennines, dreads the smaller and grimmer castle which is known to exist somewhere higher up in the mountains.

"You can go to Moor Hall if you want." Moor Hall was a small house on a small piece of land owned by Sir Hugh, located in that part of Devonshire north of Dartmoor, somewhere around the Holsworthy area, which is probably one of the most unattractive, desolate, and remote places in England. Lady Clavering had heard a lot about Moor Hall and feared it like a heroine forced to live in a large, grim castle down in the Apennines dreads the smaller, even grimmer castle that is rumored to be higher up in the mountains.

"Why couldn't I go to Brighton?" said Lady Clavering boldly.

"Why can't I go to Brighton?" Lady Clavering said boldly.

"Because I don't choose it," said Sir Hugh. After that she did go to the rectory, and told Mrs. Clavering all her troubles. She had written to her sister, having, however, delayed the doing of this for two or three days, and she had not at this time received an answer from Lady Ongar. Nor did she hear from her sister till after Sir Hugh had left her. It was on the day before his departure that she went to the rectory, finding herself driven to this act of rebellion by his threat of Moor Hall. "I will never go there unless I am dragged there by force," she said to Mrs. Clavering.

"Because I don't choose it," said Sir Hugh. After that, she went to the rectory and shared all her troubles with Mrs. Clavering. She had written to her sister, though she had delayed doing this for two or three days, and she still hadn’t received a response from Lady Ongar at that time. She didn’t hear back from her sister until after Sir Hugh had left her. It was the day before his departure when she went to the rectory, feeling pushed to this act of defiance by his threat of Moor Hall. "I will never go there unless I’m forced to," she told Mrs. Clavering.

"I don't think he means that," said Mrs. Clavering. "He only wants to make you understand that you'd better remain at the Park."

"I don't think he really means that," said Mrs. Clavering. "He just wants you to know that it's better for you to stay at the Park."

"But if you knew what a house it is to be all alone in!"

"But if you knew what it's like to be all alone in a house!"

"Dear Hermione, I do know! But you must come to us oftener, and let us endeavour to make it better for you."

"Dear Hermione, I really do! But you need to come visit us more often, and let’s work on making things better for you."

"But how can I do that? How can I come to his uncle's house, just because my own husband has made my own home so wretched that I cannot bear it. I'm ashamed to do that. I ought not to be telling you all this, of course. I don't know what he'd do if he knew it; but it is so hard to bear it all without telling some one."

"But how am I supposed to do that? How can I go to his uncle's house just because my own husband has made my home so miserable that I can't stand it? I'm embarrassed to even think about it. I shouldn't be sharing all this with you, really. I have no idea how he would react if he found out; but it's really hard to deal with everything alone without confiding in someone."

"My poor dear!"

"My poor thing!"

"I sometimes think I'll ask Mr. Clavering to speak to him, and to tell him at once that I will not submit to it any longer. Of course he would be mad with rage, but if he were to kill me I should like it better than having to go on in this way. I'm sure he is only waiting for me to die."

"I sometimes think I should ask Mr. Clavering to talk to him and tell him right away that I won't put up with this any longer. Of course, he would be furious, but I’d prefer that he killed me than to keep living like this. I’m sure he’s just waiting for me to die."

Mrs. Clavering said all that she could to comfort the poor woman, but there was not much that she could say. She had strongly advocated the plan of having Lady Ongar at the Park, thinking perhaps that Harry would be more safe while that lady was at Clavering, than he might perhaps be if she remained in London. But Mrs. Clavering doubted much whether Lady Ongar would consent to make such a visit. She regarded Lady Ongar as a hard, worldly, pleasure-seeking woman,—sinned against perhaps in much, but also sinning in much herself,—to whom the desolation of the Park would be even more unendurable than it was to the elder sister. But of this, of course, she said nothing. Lady Clavering left her, somewhat quieted, if not comforted; and went back to pass her last evening with her husband.

Mrs. Clavering did everything she could to comfort the poor woman, but there wasn't much she could say. She strongly supported the idea of having Lady Ongar at the Park, thinking that maybe Harry would be safer with her there than if she stayed in London. However, Mrs. Clavering seriously doubted whether Lady Ongar would agree to such a visit. She saw Lady Ongar as a tough, materialistic, pleasure-seeking woman—wronged in many ways but also guilty of her own wrongs—who would find the isolation of the Park even more unbearable than her older sister did. But, of course, she said nothing about that. Lady Clavering left her feeling somewhat calmed, if not truly comforted, and returned to spend her last evening with her husband.

"Upon second thought, I'll go by the first train," he said, as he saw her for a moment before she went up to dress. "I shall have to be off from here a little after six, but I don't mind that in summer." Thus she was to be deprived of such gratification as there might have been in breakfasting with him on the last morning! It might be hard to say in what that gratification would have consisted. She must by this time have learned that his presence gave her none of the pleasures usually expected from society. He slighted her in everything. He rarely vouchsafed to her those little attentions which all women expect from all gentlemen. If he handed her a plate, or cut for her a morsel of bread from the loaf, he showed by his manner and by his brow that the doing so was a nuisance to him. At their meals he rarely spoke to her,—having always at breakfast a paper or a book before him, and at dinner devoting his attention to a dog at his feet. Why should she have felt herself cruelly ill-used in this matter of his last breakfast,—so cruelly ill-used that she wept afresh over it as she dressed herself,—seeing that she would lose so little? Because she loved the man;—loved him, though she now thought that she hated him. We very rarely, I fancy, love those whose love we have not either possessed or expected,—or at any rate for whose love we have not hoped; but when it has once existed, ill-usage will seldom destroy it. Angry as she was with the man, ready as she was to complain of him, to rebel against him,—perhaps to separate herself from him for ever, nevertheless she found it to be a cruel grievance that she should not sit at table with him on the morning of his going. "Jackson shall bring me a cup of coffee as I'm dressing," he said, "and I'll breakfast at the club." She knew that there was no reason for this, except that breakfasting at his club was more agreeable to him than breakfasting with his wife.

"On second thought, I'll take the first train," he said, catching a glimpse of her before she went to get dressed. "I need to leave here a little after six, but I don’t mind that in the summer." So, she was going to miss out on the pleasure of having breakfast with him on their last morning together! It was hard to say what that pleasure would have even meant. By now, she must have realized that his company didn’t bring her any of the joys typically expected from being with someone. He dismissed her in every way. He rarely showed her those small gestures of kindness that all women expect from men. If he passed her a plate or cut her a piece of bread, he made it clear by his attitude and expression that it was an annoyance to him. During meals, he hardly spoke to her—always having a newspaper or book in front of him at breakfast and focusing on the dog at his feet during dinner. Why did she feel so deeply wronged about not sharing breakfast on his last morning—so wronged that she cried about it as she got ready—when she would lose so little? Because she loved him; she loved him, even though she now believed she hated him. I think we rarely love those whose affection we haven’t either received or expected—or at least hoped for; but once love has existed, mistreatment rarely ends it. As angry as she was with him, and as ready as she was to complain and rebel against him—perhaps even to leave him forever—she still felt it was a harsh injustice that she wouldn’t sit at the table with him that morning. "Jackson will bring me a cup of coffee while I get dressed," he said, "and I’ll have breakfast at the club." She knew there wasn’t any real reason for this, other than that having breakfast at his club was simply more enjoyable for him than having it with his wife.

She had got rid of her tears before she came down to dinner, but still she was melancholy and almost lachrymose. This was the last night, and she felt that something special ought to be said; but she did not know what she expected, or what it was that she herself wished to say. I think that she was longing for an opportunity to forgive him,—only that he would not be forgiven. If he would have spoken one soft word to her, she would have accepted that one word as an apology; but no such word came. He sat opposite to her at dinner, drinking his wine and feeding his dog; but he was no more gracious to her at this dinner than he had been on any former day. She sat there pretending to eat, speaking a dull word now and then, to which his answer was a monosyllable, looking out at him from under her eyes, through the candlelight, to see whether any feeling was moving him; and then having pretended to eat a couple of strawberries she left him to himself. Still, however, this was not the last. There would come some moment for an embrace,—for some cold half-embrace, in which he would be forced to utter something of a farewell.

She had wiped away her tears before coming down to dinner, but she was still sad and almost tearful. This was the last night, and she felt that something important needed to be said; yet she had no idea what she expected or what she wanted to say. I think she was hoping for a chance to forgive him—if only he would allow himself to be forgiven. If he had said just one kind word to her, she would have taken that as an apology; but no such word came. He sat across from her at dinner, drinking his wine and feeding his dog, but he was no more kind to her at this dinner than he had been on any other day. She sat there pretending to eat, managing a few dull comments now and then, to which his replies were just single syllables. She peered at him through the candlelight, trying to see if he was feeling anything; then, after pretending to eat a couple of strawberries, she left him alone. Still, this wasn’t the end. There would be a moment for a goodbye—a cold half-embrace where he would have to say something to mark their farewell.

He, when he was left alone, first turned his mind to the subject of Jack Stuart and his yacht. He had on that day received a letter from a noble friend,—a friend so noble that he was able to take liberties even with Sir Hugh Clavering,—in which his noble friend had told him that he was a fool to trust himself on so long an expedition in Jack Stuart's little boat. Jack, the noble friend said, knew nothing of the matter, and as for the masters who were hired for the sailing of such crafts, their only object was to keep out as long as possible, with an eye to their wages and perquisites. It might be all very well for Jack Stuart, who had nothing in the world to lose but his life and his yacht; but his noble friend thought that any such venture on the part of Sir Hugh was simply tomfoolery. But Sir Hugh was an obstinate man, and none of the Claverings were easily made afraid by personal danger. Jack Stuart might know nothing about the management of a boat, but Archie did. And as for the smallness of the craft,—he knew of a smaller craft which had been out on the Norway coast during the whole of the last season. So he drove that thought away from his mind, with no strong feelings of gratitude towards his noble friend.

He, when he was alone, first thought about Jack Stuart and his yacht. That day, he had received a letter from a noble friend—so noble that he could even speak freely to Sir Hugh Clavering—who told him it was foolish to trust himself to such a long trip in Jack Stuart's small boat. Jack, his noble friend said, was clueless about the situation, and as for the hired captains who were supposed to manage these crafts, their only goal was to stay out as long as possible to maximize their pay and bonuses. This might be fine for Jack Stuart, who had nothing to lose but his life and his yacht, but his noble friend believed that any such risk taken by Sir Hugh was sheer nonsense. But Sir Hugh was stubborn, and none of the Claverings were easily intimidated by personal danger. Jack Stuart might not know how to handle a boat, but Archie did. And regarding the size of the vessel—he remembered a smaller one that had been out on the Norway coast all last season. So he pushed that thought away, feeling no real gratitude toward his noble friend.

And then for a few moments he thought of his own home. What had his wife done for him, that he should put himself out of his way to do much for her? She had brought him no money. She had added nothing either by her wit, beauty, or rank to his position in the world. She had given him no heir. What had he received from her that he should endure her commonplace conversation, and washed-out, dowdy prettinesses? Perhaps some momentary feeling of compassion, some twang of conscience, came across his heart, as he thought of it all; but if so he checked it instantly, in accordance with the teachings of his whole life. He had made his reflections on all these things, and had tutored his mind to certain resolutions, and would not allow himself to be carried away by any womanly softness. She had her house, her carriage, her bed, her board, and her clothes; and seeing how very little she herself had contributed to the common fund, her husband determined that in having those things she had all that she had a right to claim. Then he drank a glass of sherry, and went into the drawing-room with that hard smile upon his face, which he was accustomed to wear when he intended to signify to his wife that she might as well make the best of existing things, and not cause unnecessary trouble, by giving herself airs or assuming that she was unhappy.

And then for a few moments he thought about his own home. What had his wife done for him that made him go out of his way to do much for her? She hadn't brought him any money. She hadn't added anything to his status in the world with her intelligence, looks, or social standing. She hadn't given him any children. What had he gained from her that justified putting up with her boring conversations and faded attempts at beauty? Maybe he felt a fleeting sense of compassion or a twinge of guilt as he thought about it all; but if he did, he immediately pushed it aside, following the lessons of his entire life. He had reflected on these matters and trained his mind to stick to certain decisions, refusing to be swayed by any emotional softness. She had her home, her carriage, her bed, her meals, and her clothes; considering how little she had actually contributed to their shared life, he decided that having those things was all she was entitled to. Then he drank a glass of sherry and went into the drawing room with the hard smile he wore when he wanted to signal to his wife that she should just make the best of things as they were and not cause unnecessary trouble by acting pretentious or assuming she was unhappy.

He had his cup of coffee, and she had her cup of tea, and she made one or two little attempts at saying something special,—something that might lead to a word or two as to their parting; but he was careful and crafty, and she was awkward and timid,—and she failed. He had hardly been there an hour, when looking at his watch he declared that it was ten o'clock, and that he would go to bed. Well; perhaps it might be best to bring it to an end, and to go through this embrace, and have done with it! Any tender word that was to be spoken on either side, it was now clear to her, must be spoken in that last farewell. There was a tear in her eye as she rose to kiss him; but the tear was not there of her own good will, and she strove to get rid of it without his seeing it. As he spoke he also rose, and having lit for himself a bed-candle was ready to go. "Good-by, Hermy," he said, submitting himself, with the candle in his hand, to the inevitable embrace.

He had his cup of coffee, and she had her cup of tea. She tried once or twice to say something meaningful—something that might lead to a conversation about their separation—but he was careful and cunning, while she was awkward and shy, and she couldn't manage it. He had barely been there an hour when he looked at his watch and announced that it was ten o'clock and that he was going to bed. Well, maybe it was best to wrap things up, to go through this embrace, and be done with it! It was clear to her that any tender words that needed to be said would have to come during that final goodbye. A tear welled up in her eye as she stood to kiss him, but that tear wasn’t something she wanted, and she tried to brush it away without him noticing. As he spoke, he also stood up, and after lighting a candle for himself, he was ready to leave. "Goodbye, Hermy," he said, accepting the inevitable embrace with the candle in his hand.

"Good-by, Hugh; and God bless you," she said, putting her arms round his neck. "Pray,—pray take care of yourself."

"Goodbye, Hugh; and God bless you," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Please—please take care of yourself."

"All right," he said. His position with the candle was awkward, and he wished that it might be over.

"Okay," he said. His grip on the candle was awkward, and he wished it was all over.

Husband and wife.
Husband and wife. Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

But she had a word prepared which she was determined to utter,—poor weak creature that she was. She still had her arm round his shoulders, so that he could not escape without shaking her off, and her forehead was almost resting on his bosom. "Hugh," she said, "you must not be angry with me for what I said to you."

But she had a statement ready that she was determined to say—poor, fragile thing that she was. She still had her arm around his shoulders, so he couldn’t get away without pushing her off, and her forehead was nearly resting on his chest. "Hugh," she said, "you can't be mad at me for what I said to you."

"Very well," said he;—"I won't."

"Okay," he said; "I won't."

"And, Hugh," said she; "of course I can't like your going."

"And, Hugh," she said, "I really can't be okay with you leaving."

"Oh, yes, you will," said he.

"Oh, yes, you will," he said.

"No;—I can't like it; but, Hugh, I will not think ill of it any more. Only be here as much as you can when you come home."

"No; I can't like it, but, Hugh, I won't think badly of it anymore. Just be here as much as you can when you come home."

"All right," said he; then he kissed her forehead and escaped from her, and went his way, telling himself, as he went, that she was a fool.

"All right," he said; then he kissed her forehead and distanced himself from her, walking away while thinking to himself that she was being foolish.

That was the last he saw of her,—before his yachting commenced; but she,—poor fool,—was up by times in the morning, and, peeping out between her curtains as the early summer sun glanced upon her eyelids, saw him come forth from the porch and descend the great steps, and get into his dog-cart and drive himself away. Then, when the sound of the gig could be no longer heard, and when her eyes could no longer catch the last expiring speck of his hat, the poor fool took herself to bed again and cried herself to sleep.

That was the last time he saw her—before his yachting started; but she—poor thing—was up early in the morning, and peeking out from between her curtains as the early summer sun lit up her eyelids, saw him come out from the porch, walk down the big steps, and get into his dog cart to drive off by himself. Then, when she could no longer hear the sound of the cart and her eyes could no longer spot the last glimpse of his hat, the poor thing went back to bed and cried herself to sleep.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXVI.

CAPTAIN CLAVERING MAKES HIS LAST ATTEMPT.

The yachting scheme was first proposed to Archie by his brother Hugh. "Jack says that he can make a berth for you, and you'd better come," said the elder brother, understanding that when his edict had thus gone forth, the thing was as good as arranged. "Jack finds the boat and men, and I find the grub and wine,—and pay for the fishing," said Hugh; "so you need not make any bones about it." Archie was not disposed to make any bones about it as regarded his acceptance either of the berth or of the grub and wine, and as he would be expected to earn his passage by his work, there was no necessity for any scruple; but there arose the question whether he had not got more important fish to fry. He had not as yet made his proposal to Lady Ongar, and although he now knew that he had nothing to hope from the Russian spy,—nevertheless he thought that he might as well try his own hand at the venture. His resolution on this head was always stronger after dinner than before, and generally became stronger and more strong as the evening advanced;—so that he usually went to bed with a firm determination "to pop," as he called it to his friend Doodles, early on the next day; but distance affected him as well as the hour of the day, and his purpose would become surprisingly cool in the neighbourhood of Bolton Street. When, however, his brother suggested that he should be taken altogether away from the scene of action, he thought of the fine income and of Ongar Park with pangs of regret, and ventured upon a mild remonstrance. "But there's this affair of Julia, you know," said he.

The yachting plan was first suggested to Archie by his brother Hugh. "Jack says he can get a spot for you, so you'd better come," said the older brother, knowing that once he put it out there, it was basically set. "Jack will handle the boat and the crew, and I'll take care of the food and drinks—and cover the fishing," Hugh added, "so you don't need to hesitate about it." Archie wasn’t inclined to hesitate about accepting either the spot or the food and drinks, and since he was expected to earn his keep with work, there was no need for any second thoughts. However, he did wonder if he had more important things to deal with. He hadn’t yet made his proposal to Lady Ongar, and while he now realized he shouldn’t expect anything from the Russian spy, he still thought he might as well give it a shot. His resolve on this matter was always stronger after dinner than before, and usually intensified as the evening went on—so he typically went to bed determined to "pop the question," as he called it to his friend Doodles, early the next day. But distance affected him just as much as the time of day, and his determination would surprisingly weaken when he got near Bolton Street. However, when his brother suggested getting him completely away from the situation, he couldn't help but think about the good income and Ongar Park with a bit of regret, and he hesitated to voice his concerns. "But there's this thing with Julia, you know," he said.

"I thought that was all off," said Hugh.

"I thought that was all wrong," said Hugh.

"O dear, no; not off at all. I haven't asked her yet."

"O dear, no; not at all. I haven't asked her yet."

"I know you've not; and I don't suppose you ever will."

"I know you haven't, and I don't think you ever will."

"Yes, I shall;—that is to say, I mean it. I was advised not to be in too much of a hurry; that is to say, I thought it best to let her settle down a little after her first seeing me."

"Yes, I will;—that is to say, I really mean it. I was told not to rush things; that is to say, I thought it was better to let her get comfortable after meeting me for the first time."

"To recover from her confusion?"

"To recover from her confusion?"

"Well, not exactly that. I don't suppose she was confused."

"Well, not exactly that. I don't think she was confused."

"I should say not. My idea is that you haven't a ghost of chance, and that as you haven't done anything all this time, you need not trouble yourself now."

"I really don't think so. My belief is that you don't have a chance at all, and since you haven't done anything all this time, there's no need for you to worry about it now."

"But I have done something," said Archie, thinking of his seventy pounds.

"But I have done something," Archie said, thinking about his seventy pounds.

"You may as well give it up, for she means to marry Harry."

"You might as well give it up, because she plans to marry Harry."

"No!"

"Nope!"

"But I tell you she does. While you've been thinking he's been doing. From what I hear he may have her to-morrow for the asking."

"But I tell you she does. While you've been thinking he's been doing. From what I've heard, he might have her tomorrow if he just asks."

"But he's engaged to that girl whom they had with them down at the rectory," said Archie, in a tone which showed with what horror he should regard any inconstancy towards Florence Burton on the part of Harry Clavering.

"But he's engaged to that girl they had with them at the rectory," said Archie, his tone revealing the horror he would feel about any betrayal towards Florence Burton by Harry Clavering.

"What does that matter? You don't suppose he'll let seven thousand a year slip through his fingers because he had promised to marry a little girl like her? If her people choose to proceed against him they'll make him pay swinging damages; that is all."

"What does that matter? You really think he’ll let seven thousand a year slip away just because he promised to marry a little girl like her? If her family decides to take action against him, they’ll make him pay big damages; that’s all."

Archie did not like this idea at all, and became more than ever intent on his own matrimonial prospects. He almost thought that he had a right to Lady Ongar's money, and he certainly did think that a monstrous injustice was done to him by this idea of a marriage between her and his cousin. "I mean to ask her as I've gone so far, certainly," said he.

Archie really disliked this idea and became even more focused on his own chances of getting married. He almost believed he had a claim to Lady Ongar's money, and he definitely thought it was a huge injustice that his cousin might marry her. "I’m going to ask her since I’ve come this far, for sure," he said.

"You can do as you like about that."

"You can do whatever you want about that."

"Yes; of course I can do as I like; but when a fellow has gone in for a thing, he likes to see it through." He was still thinking of the seventy pounds which he had invested, and which he could now recover only out of Lady Ongar's pocket.

"Yes; obviously I can do whatever I want; but when someone commits to something, they want to see it through." He was still considering the seventy pounds he had invested, which he could now only recover from Lady Ongar's funds.

"And you mean to say you won't come to Norway?"

"And you really won't come to Norway?"

"Well; if she accepts me—"

"Well, if she accepts me—"

"If she accepts you," said Hugh, "of course you can't come; but supposing she don't?"

"If she accepts you," Hugh said, "then you definitely can't come; but what if she doesn’t?"

"In that case, I might as well do that as anything else," said Archie. Whereupon Sir Hugh signified to Jack Stuart that Archie would join the party, and went down to Clavering with no misgiving on that head.

"In that case, I might as well do that as anything else," said Archie. Sir Hugh then signaled to Jack Stuart that Archie would join the group and went down to Clavering without any concerns about it.

Some few days after this there was another little dinner at the military club, to which no one was admitted but Archie and his friend Doodles. Whenever these prandial consultations were held, Archie paid the bill. There were no spoken terms to that effect, but the regulation seemed to come naturally to both of them. Why should Doodles be taken from his billiards half-an-hour earlier than usual, and devote a portion of the calculating powers of his brain to Archie's service without compensation? And a richer vintage was needed when so much thought was required, the burden of which Archie would not of course allow to fall on his friend's shoulders. Were not this explained, the experienced reader would regard the devoted friendship of Doodles as exaggerated.

A few days later, there was another small dinner at the military club, to which only Archie and his friend Doodles were invited. Whenever they had these meals together, Archie always covered the bill. There were no explicit agreements about it, but it just seemed to happen naturally for both of them. Why should Doodles leave his billiards half an hour early and use some of his brainpower for Archie without getting anything in return? And a better drink was needed when so much thinking was involved, a burden Archie would never let fall on his friend's shoulders. If this wasn't explained, an experienced reader might think Doodles’ devoted friendship was a bit over the top.

"I certainly shall ask her to-morrow," said Archie, looking with a thoughtful cast of countenance through the club window into the street. "It may be hurrying the matter a little, but I can't help that." He spoke in a somewhat boastful tone, as though he were proud of himself and had forgotten that he had said the same words once or twice before.

"I will definitely ask her tomorrow," said Archie, gazing thoughtfully out the club window into the street. "I might be rushing things a bit, but I can't help it." He spoke in a somewhat proud tone, as if he were pleased with himself and had forgotten that he had said the same thing once or twice before.

"Make her know that you're there; that's everything," said Doodles. "Since I fathomed that woman in Mount Street, I've felt that you must make the score off your own bat, if you're to make it at all."

"Let her know you’re around; that’s all that matters," Doodles said. "Since I got a read on that woman on Mount Street, I’ve felt that you need to take the initiative yourself if you’re going to get anywhere."

"You did that well," said Archie, who knew that the amount of pleasing encouragement which he might hope to get from his friend, must depend on the praise which he himself should bestow. "Yes; you certainly did bowl her over uncommon well."

"You did that well," said Archie, who understood that the level of praise he could expect from his friend would depend on the compliments he offered. "Yes; you really did impress her exceptionally well."

"That kind of thing just comes within my line," said Doodles, with conscious pride. "Now, as to asking Lady Ongar downright to marry me,—upon my word I believe I should be half afraid of doing it myself."

"That sort of thing is just my specialty," said Doodles, with a sense of pride. "As for asking Lady Ongar outright to marry me—honestly, I think I'd be a bit scared to do it myself."

"I've none of that kind of feeling," said Archie.

"I don't feel that way at all," said Archie.

"It comes more in your way, I daresay," said Doodles. "But for me, what I like is a little bit of management,—what I call a touch of the diplomatic. You'll be able to see her to-morrow?"

"It gets in your way more, I guess," said Doodles. "But for me, what I enjoy is a bit of management—what I like to call a touch of diplomacy. You'll be able to see her tomorrow?"

"I hope so. I shall go early,—that is, as soon as I've looked through the papers and written a few letters. Yes, I think she'll see me. And as for what Hugh says about Harry Clavering, why, d—— it, you know, a fellow can't go on in that way; can he?"

"I hope so. I'll go early—once I've looked through the papers and written a few letters. Yeah, I think she'll see me. And about what Hugh says about Harry Clavering, well, damn it, you know, a guy can't keep doing that, can he?"

"Because of the other girl, you mean?"

"Are you talking about the other girl?"

"He has had her down among all our people, just as though they were going to be married to-morrow. If a man is to do that kind of thing, what woman can be safe?"

"He has brought her around all our people, almost as if they were getting married tomorrow. If a guy is going to do that, what woman can feel safe?"

"I wonder whether she likes him?" asked the crafty Doodles.

"I wonder if she likes him?" asked the sly Doodles.

"She did like him, I fancy, in her calf days; but that means nothing. She knows what she's at now, bless you, and she'll look to the future. It's my son who'll have the Clavering property and be the baronet, not his. You see what a string to my bow that is."

"She liked him, I think, back in her younger days; but that doesn't really matter. She knows what she's doing now, trust me, and she's focused on the future. My son is the one who will inherit the Clavering property and be the baronet, not his. You see how that gives me an advantage."

When this banquet was over, Doodles made something of a resolution that it should be the last to be eaten on that subject. The matter had lost its novelty, and the price paid to him was not sufficient to secure his attention any longer. "I shall be here to-morrow at four," he said, as he rose from his chair with the view of retreating to the smoking-room, "and then we shall know all about it. Whichever way it's to be, it isn't worth your while keeping such a thing as that in hand any longer. I should say give her her chance to-morrow, and then have done with it." Archie in reply to this declared that those were exactly his sentiments, and then went away to prepare himself in silence and solitude for the next day's work.

When the banquet was over, Doodles decided that it would be the last time he would engage in that topic. It had lost its appeal, and the compensation he received was no longer enough to hold his interest. "I'll be here tomorrow at four," he said, getting up from his chair and planning to head to the smoking room, "and then we'll figure it all out. No matter how it goes, it's not worth keeping something like this hanging around any longer. I’d say give her a chance tomorrow, and then just be done with it." Archie responded that he completely agreed with that, and then left to quietly prepare for the next day's tasks.

On the following day at two o'clock Lady Ongar was sitting alone in the front room on the ground-floor in Bolton Street. Of Harry Clavering's illness she had as yet heard nothing, nor of his absence from London. She had not seen him since he had parted from her on that evening when he had asked her to be his wife, and the last words she had heard from his lips had made this request. She, indeed, had then bade him be true to her rival,—to Florence Burton. She had told him this in spite of her love,—of her love for him and of his for her. They two, she had said, could not now become man and wife;—but he had not acknowledged the truth of what she had said. She could not write to him. She could make no overtures. She could ask no questions. She had no friend in whom she could place confidence. She could only wait for him, till he should come to her or send to her, and let her know what was to be her fate.

On the next day at two o'clock, Lady Ongar was sitting alone in the front room on the ground floor in Bolton Street. She hadn't heard anything about Harry Clavering's illness or his absence from London. She hadn’t seen him since he left her that evening when he proposed, and the last words she heard from him were that request. She had urged him to stay true to her rival—Florence Burton. She said this despite her love for him and his for her. She told him that they couldn't become husband and wife now; but he hadn’t accepted the truth of what she said. She couldn’t write to him. She couldn’t make any moves. She couldn’t ask any questions. She had no friend she could confide in. All she could do was wait for him to come to her or send her a message to tell her what her fate would be.

As she now sat she held a letter in her hand which had just been brought to her from Sophie,—from her poor, famished, but indefatigable Sophie. Sophie she had not seen since they had parted on the railway platform, and then the parting was supposed to be made in lasting enmity. Desolate as she was, she had congratulated herself much on her escape from Sophie's friendship, and was driven by no qualms of her heart to long for a renewal of the old ties. But it was not so with the more affectionate Sophie; and Sophie therefore had written,—as follows:—
 

As she sat there, she held a letter in her hand that had just been delivered to her from Sophie—her poor, starving, but tireless Sophie. She hadn't seen Sophie since they parted on the train platform, and that goodbye was meant to signal a lasting rivalry. Despite her despair, she had felt relieved to be free from Sophie's friendship, and she had no guilty feelings urging her to want to reconnect. But Sophie, who was more affectionate, felt differently, and so she had written the following:—

Mount Street—Friday morning.

Mount Street—Friday morning.

Dearest dearest Julie,—My heart is so sad that I cannot keep my silence longer. What; can such friendship as ours has been be made to die all in a minute? Oh, no;—not at least in my bosom, which is filled with love for my Julie. And my Julie will not turn from her friend, who has been so true to her,—ah, at such moments too,—oh, yes, at such moments!—just for an angry word, or a little indiscretion. What was it after all about my brother? Bah! He is a fool; that is all. If you shall wish it, I will never speak to him again. What is my brother to me, compared to my Julie? My brother is nothing to me. I tell him we go to that accursed island,—accursed island because my Julie has quarrelled with me there,—and he arranges himself to follow us. What could I do? I could not tie him up by the leg in his London club. He is a man whom no one can tie up by the leg. Mon Dieu, no. He is very hard to tie up.

Dearest dearest Julie,—My heart is so heavy that I can’t stay silent any longer. How can a friendship like ours just fade away in an instant? Oh, no;—not in my heart, which is overflowing with love for my Julie. And my Julie won’t turn her back on her friend, who has been so loyal to her,—especially in these moments,—oh, yes, in these moments!—just because of a harsh word or a small mistake. What was it really about my brother? Ugh! He’s such a fool; that’s all. If you want, I’ll never speak to him again. What does my brother mean to me compared to my Julie? Nothing at all. I told him we’re going to that cursed island,—cursed because my Julie and I had a fight there,—and he just decides to tag along. What could I do? I couldn’t just keep him at his London club. He’s a guy who can’t be kept down. Mon Dieu, no. He’s really hard to pin down.

Do I wish him for your husband? Never! Why should I wish him for your husband? If I was a man, my Julie, I should wish you for myself. But I am not, and why should you not have him whom you like the best? If I was you, with your beauty and money and youth, I would have any man that I liked,—everything. I know, of course,—for did I not see? It is that young Clavering to whom your little heart wishes to render itself;—not the captain who is a fool,—such a fool! but the other who is not a fool, but a fine fellow;—and so handsome! Yes; there is no doubt as to that. He is beautiful as a Phœbus. [This was good-natured on the part of Sophie, who, as the reader may remember, hated Harry Clavering herself.]

Do I wish him to be your husband? Absolutely not! Why would I want that for you? If I were a man, my Julie, I would want you for myself. But I’m not, so why shouldn’t you have the one you like the most? If I were in your shoes, with your beauty, wealth, and youth, I would take any man I wanted—everything. I know, of course—didn’t I see? It’s that young Clavering your heart is drawn to—not the captain, who is such a fool! But the other one, who isn’t a fool at all; he’s a great guy, and so handsome! No doubt about that. He’s as beautiful as Apollo. [This was generous of Sophie, who, as you might remember, actually disliked Harry Clavering herself.]

Well,—why should he not be your own? As for your poor Sophie, she would do all in her power to assist the friend whom she love. There is that little girl,—yes; it is true as I told you. But little girls cannot have all they want always. He is a gay deceiver. These men who are so beautiful as Phœbus are always deceivers. But you need not be the one deceived;—you with your money and your beauty and your—what you call rank. No, I think not; and I think that little girl must put up with it, as other little girls have done, since the men first learned how to tell lies. That is my advice, and if you will let me I can give you good assistance.

Well, why shouldn’t he be yours? As for your poor Sophie, she would do everything she can to help the friend she loves. There’s that little girl—yes, it’s true as I told you. But little girls can’t always have everything they want. He’s a charming liar. Men who are as handsome as Phœbus often are. But you don’t have to be the one who gets tricked; with your money, beauty, and—what do you call it—status. No, I don’t think so; and I believe that little girl has to deal with it, just like other little girls have since men first learned how to lie. That’s my advice, and if you let me, I can offer you good help.

Dearest Julie, think of all this, and do not banish your Sophie. I am so true to you, that I cannot live without you. Send me back one word of permission, and I will come to you, and kneel at your feet. And in the meantime, I am

Dearest Julie, consider all of this, and don’t push away your Sophie. I am so devoted to you that I can’t live without you. Send me just one word of permission, and I’ll come to you and kneel at your feet. And in the meantime, I am

Your most devoted friend,

Your most devoted friend,

Sophie.
 

Sophie.

Lady Ongar, on the receipt of this letter, was not at all changed in her purpose with reference to Madame Gordeloup. She knew well enough where her Sophie's heart was placed, and would yield to no further pressure from that quarter; but Sophie's reasoning, nevertheless, had its effect. She, Lady Ongar, with her youth, her beauty, her wealth, and her rank, why should she not have that one thing which alone could make her happy, seeing, as she did see, or as she thought she saw, that in making herself happy she could do so much, could confer such great blessings on him she loved? She had already found that the money she had received as the price of herself had done very little towards making her happy in her present state. What good was it to her that she had a carriage and horses and two footmen six feet high? One pleasant word from lips that she could love,—from the lips of man or woman that she could esteem,—would be worth it all. She had gone down to her pleasant place in the country,—a place so pleasant that it had a fame of its own among the luxuriantly pleasant seats of the English country gentry; she had gone there, expecting to be happy in the mere feeling that it was all her own; and the whole thing had been to her so unutterably sad, so wretched in the severity of its desolation, that she had been unable to endure her life amidst the shade of her own trees. All her apples hitherto had turned to ashes between her teeth, because her fate had forced her to attempt the eating of them alone. But if she could give the fruit to him,—if she could make the apples over, so that they should all be his, and not hers, then would there not come to her some of the sweetness of the juice of them?

Lady Ongar, upon receiving this letter, remained completely resolute regarding Madame Gordeloup. She was fully aware of where Sophie's heart lay and would not succumb to any further demands from that direction; however, Sophie's reasoning still had an impact. With her youth, beauty, wealth, and status, why shouldn’t Lady Ongar seek that one thing that could truly make her happy, especially since she believed that doing so could bring such great joy to the person she loved? She had already discovered that the money she had received for herself did very little to bring her happiness in her current situation. What was the point of having a carriage, horses, and two footmen towering at six feet? One kind word from someone she could care for—whether that came from a man or a woman she respected—would mean everything. She had gone to her lovely country retreat—a place so charming that it had gained its own reputation among the pleasantly affluent estates of the English gentry—hoping to find happiness in the simple fact that it was all hers; instead, she found it utterly sorrowful and painfully desolate, to the point that she couldn't bear to live among her own trees. All her pleasures had turned to ashes in her mouth because she had been condemned to experience them alone. But if she could share the fruit with him—if she could make the apples his instead of hers, wouldn’t she then taste some of their sweetness?

She declared to herself that she would not tempt this man to be untrue to his troth, were it not that in doing so she would so greatly benefit himself. Was it not manifest that Harry Clavering was a gentleman, qualified to shine among men of rank and fashion, but not qualified to make his way by his own diligence? In saying this of him, she did not know how heavy was the accusation that she brought against him; but what woman, within her own breast, accuses the man she loves? Were he to marry Florence Burton, would he not ruin himself, and probably ruin her also? But she could give him all that he wanted. Though Ongar Park to her alone was, with its rich pastures and spreading oaks and lowing cattle, desolate as the Dead Sea shore, for him,—and for her with him,—would it not be the very paradise suited to them? Would it not be the heaven in which such a Phœbus should shine amidst the gyrations of his satellites? A Phœbus going about his own field in knickerbockers, and with attendant satellites, would possess a divinity which, as she thought, might make her happy. As she thought of all this, and asked herself these questions, there was an inner conscience which told her that she had no right to Harry's love or Harry's hand; but still she could not cease to long that good things might come to her, though those good things had not been deserved. Alas, good things not deserved too often lose their goodness when they come! As she was sitting with Sophie's letter in her hand the door was opened, and Captain Clavering was announced.

She told herself that she wouldn’t tempt this man to betray his promise, especially since doing so would greatly benefit him. Wasn’t it clear that Harry Clavering was a gentleman, capable of standing out among those of rank and fashion, but not able to succeed on his own hard work? In saying this about him, she didn’t realize how serious the accusation she was making against him was; but what woman, in her heart, accuses the man she loves? If he were to marry Florence Burton, wouldn’t he ruin himself and probably ruin her too? But she could give him everything he wanted. While Ongar Park was, to her alone, as desolate as the shore of the Dead Sea with its rich pastures, sprawling oaks, and mooing cattle, wouldn’t it be a paradise for him—and for her with him? Would it not be the heaven where such a Phœbus would shine among the orbits of his followers? A Phœbus wandering through his own fields in knickerbockers, surrounded by attendants, would have a divinity that, she believed, could make her happy. As she pondered all of this and asked herself these questions, a nagging voice inside her reminded her that she had no claim to Harry's love or his hand; yet, she couldn’t help but wish for good things to come her way, even if she didn’t deserve them. Unfortunately, good things often lose their goodness when they arrive unearned! As she sat there with Sophie’s letter in her hand, the door opened, and Captain Clavering was announced.

Captain Archibald Clavering was again dressed in his very best, but he did not even yet show by his demeanour that aptitude for the business now in hand of which he had boasted on the previous evening to his friend. Lady Ongar, I think, partly guessed the object of his visit. She had perceived, or perhaps had unconsciously felt, on the occasion of his former coming, that the visit had not been made simply from motives of civility. She had known Archie in old days, and was aware that the splendour of his vestments had a significance. Well, if anything of that kind was to be done, the sooner it was done the better.

Captain Archibald Clavering was once again wearing his finest clothes, but he didn’t yet show the confidence for the task at hand that he had bragged about the night before to his friend. Lady Ongar seemed to suspect why he was there. She had noticed, or maybe even felt instinctively, during his last visit that it wasn’t purely a social call. She had known Archie back in the day and understood that his lavish attire held meaning. If something was going to happen, the sooner it happened, the better.

"Julia," he said, as soon as he was seated, "I hope I have the pleasure of seeing you quite well?"

"Julia," he said, as soon as he sat down, "I hope I'm lucky enough to see you doing well?"

"Pretty well, I thank you," said she.

"Pretty good, thanks," she replied.

"You have been out of town, I think?" She told him that she had been in the Isle of Wight for a day or two, and then there was a short silence. "When I heard that you were gone," he said, "I feared that perhaps you were ill!"

"You’ve been out of town, right?" She said that she had been in the Isle of Wight for a day or two, and then there was a brief silence. "When I heard you were away," he said, "I worried that maybe you were sick!"

"O dear, no; nothing of that sort."

"O dear, no; nothing like that."

"I am so glad," said Archie; and then he was silent again. He had, however, as he was aware, thrown a great deal of expression into his inquiries after her health, and he had now to calculate how he could best use the standing-ground that he had made for himself.

"I’m so glad," said Archie; and then he fell silent again. He had, however, as he knew, put a lot of feeling into his questions about her health, and now he had to figure out how to best use the position he had created for himself.

"Have you seen my sister lately?" she asked.

"Have you seen my sister recently?" she asked.

"Your sister? no. She is always at Clavering. I think it doosed wrong of Hugh, the way he goes on, keeping her down there, while he is up here in London. It isn't at all my idea of what a husband ought to do."

"Your sister? No. She's always at Clavering. I think it's really wrong of Hugh the way he keeps her down there while he's up here in London. That's not at all how I think a husband should act."

"I suppose she likes it," said Lady Ongar.

"I guess she likes it," Lady Ongar said.

"Oh, if she likes it, that's a different thing, of course," said Archie. Then there was another pause.

"Oh, if she likes it, that's a whole other story, of course," said Archie. Then there was another pause.

"Don't you find yourself rather lonely here sometimes?" he asked.

"Don't you ever feel a bit lonely here sometimes?" he asked.

Lady Ongar felt that it would be better for all parties that it should be over, and that it would not be over soon unless she could help him. "Very lonely indeed," she said; "but then I suppose that it is the fate of widows to be lonely."

Lady Ongar felt that it would be better for everyone if it was over, and that it wouldn't be over anytime soon unless she could help him. "Very lonely indeed," she said; "but I guess that's just the fate of widows."

"I don't see that at all," said Archie, briskly; "—unless they are old and ugly, and that kind of thing. When a widow has become a widow after she has been married ever so many years, why then I suppose she looks to be left alone; and I suppose they like it."

"I don't see that at all," Archie said quickly. "—unless they are old and unattractive, or something like that. When a woman becomes a widow after being married for a long time, I guess she wants to be alone; and I think they enjoy it."

"Indeed, I can't say. I don't like it."

"Honestly, I can't say. I don't like it."

"Then you would wish to change?"

"Are you saying you want to change?"

"It is a very intricate subject, Captain Clavering, and one which I do not think I am quite disposed to discuss at present. After a year or two, perhaps I shall go into society again. Most widows do, I believe."

"It’s a pretty complex issue, Captain Clavering, and honestly, I’m not really in the mood to talk about it right now. Maybe after a year or two, I’ll rejoin society. I think most widows do, right?"

"But I was thinking of something else," said Archie, working himself up to the point with great energy, but still with many signs that he was ill at ease at his work. "I was, by Jove!"

"But I was thinking of something else," said Archie, getting himself ready to make his point with a lot of effort, but still showing plenty of signs that he was uncomfortable with what he was doing. "I really was, I swear!"

"And of what were you thinking, Captain Clavering?"

"And what were you thinking, Captain Clavering?"

"I was thinking,—of course you know, Julia, that since poor little Hughy's death, I am the next in for the title?"

"I was thinking—you know, Julia, that since poor little Hughy passed away, I'm next in line for the title?"

"Poor Hughy! I'm sure you are too generous to rejoice at that."

"Poor Hughy! I'm sure you're too kind to be happy about that."

"Indeed I am. When two fellows offered me a dinner at the club on the score of my chances, I wouldn't have it. But there's the fact;—isn't it?"

"Yeah, I am. When two guys invited me for dinner at the club because of my chances, I turned it down. But that's the truth; isn't it?"

"There is no doubt of that, I believe."

"There’s no doubt about that, I think."

"None on earth; and the most of it is entailed, too; not that Hugh would leave an acre away from the title. I'm as safe as wax as far as that is concerned. I don't suppose he ever borrowed a shilling or mortgaged an acre in his life."

"None on earth; and most of it is tied up with the title; not that Hugh would give away even an acre. I'm as secure as can be on that front. I doubt he ever borrowed a dime or mortgaged an acre in his life."

"I should think he was a prudent man."

"I would say he was a cautious man."

"We are both of us prudent. I will say that of myself, though I oughtn't to say it. And now, Julia,—a few words are the best after all. Look here,—if you'll take me just as I am, I'm blessed if I shan't be the happiest fellow in all London. I shall indeed. I've always been uncommon fond of you, though I never said anything about it in the old days, because,—because you see, what's the use of a man asking a girl to marry him if they haven't got a farthing between them. I think it's wrong; I do indeed; but it's different now, you know." It certainly was very different now.

"We’re both careful people. I can say that about myself, even if I shouldn’t. And now, Julia,—a few words are really the best. Listen,—if you’ll accept me just as I am, I swear I’ll be the happiest guy in all of London. I truly will. I’ve always really liked you, even though I never mentioned it back in the day, because,—well, what’s the point of a guy asking a girl to marry him if they don’t have a penny to their name? I think that’s wrong; I really do; but it’s different now, you know." It certainly was very different now.

"Captain Clavering," she said, "I'm sorry you should have troubled yourself with such an idea as this."

"Captain Clavering," she said, "I'm sorry you had to bother with an idea like this."

"Don't say that, Julia. It's no trouble; it's a pleasure."

"Don't say that, Julia. It's no trouble at all; I enjoy it."

"But such a thing as you mean never can take place."

"But what you're talking about can never actually happen."

"Yes, it can. Why can't it? I ain't in a hurry. I'll wait your own time, and do just whatever you wish all the while. Don't say no without thinking about it, Julia."

"Yes, it can. Why not? I'm not in a rush. I'll wait for you and do whatever you want in the meantime. Please don't say no without considering it, Julia."

"It is one of those things, Captain Clavering, which want no more thinking than what a woman can give to it at the first moment."

"It’s one of those things, Captain Clavering, that doesn’t need more thought than what a woman can give it right away."

"Ah,—you think so now, because you're surprised a little."

"Ah—you think that way now because you're a bit surprised."

"Well; I am surprised a little, as our previous intercourse was never of a nature to make such a proposition as this at all probable."

"Well, I'm a bit surprised since our previous interactions never suggested that a proposal like this would be likely at all."

"That was merely because I didn't think it right," said Archie, who, now that he had worked himself into the vein, liked the sound of his own voice. "It was indeed."

"That was just because I didn't think it was right," said Archie, who, now that he had gotten into the groove, enjoyed hearing his own voice. "It really was."

"And I don't think it right now. You must listen to me for a moment, Captain Clavering—for fear of a mistake. Believe me, any such plan as this is quite out of the question;—quite." In uttering that last word she managed to use a tone of voice which did make an impression on him. "I never can, under any circumstances, become your wife. You might as well look upon that as altogether decided, because it will save us both annoyance."

"And I don't think so right now. You need to listen to me for a moment, Captain Clavering—just to avoid any mistakes. Believe me, any plan like this is completely off the table; absolutely." When she said that last word, her tone made an impact on him. "I can never, under any circumstances, become your wife. You might as well see that as completely settled, because it will spare us both some hassle."

"You needn't be so sure yet, Julia."

"You don’t need to be so sure yet, Julia."

"Yes, I must be sure. And unless you will promise me to drop the matter, I must,—to protect myself,—desire my servants not to admit you into the house again. I shall be sorry to do that, and I think you will save me from the necessity."

"Yes, I need to be certain. And unless you promise me to leave this issue alone, I have to— to look out for myself— instruct my staff not to let you into the house again. I'll regret doing that, and I believe you can prevent it."

He did save her from that necessity, and before he went he gave her the required promise. "That's well," said she, tendering him her hand; "and now we shall part friends."

He saved her from that obligation, and before he left, he gave her the promise she needed. "That's good," she said, offering him her hand; "and now we can part as friends."

"I shall like to be friends," said he, in a crestfallen voice, and with that he took his leave. It was a great comfort to him that he had the scheme of Jack Stuart's yacht and the trip to Norway for his immediate consolation.

"I would like to be friends," he said, sounding downcast, and with that, he left. It was a huge relief for him that he had the plan for Jack Stuart's yacht and the trip to Norway to cheer him up right away.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXVII.

WHAT LADY ONGAR THOUGHT ABOUT IT.

Mrs. Burton, it may perhaps be remembered, had formed in her heart a scheme of her own—a scheme of which she thought with much trepidation, and in which she could not request her husband's assistance, knowing well that he would not only not assist it, but that he would altogether disapprove of it. But yet she could not put it aside from her thoughts, believing that it might be the means of bringing Harry Clavering and Florence together. Her husband had now thoroughly condemned poor Harry, and had passed sentence against him,—not indeed openly to Florence herself, but very often in the hearing of his wife. Cecilia, womanlike, was more angry with circumstances than with the offending man,—with circumstances and with the woman who stood in Florence's way. She was perfectly willing to forgive Harry, if Harry could only be made to go right at last. He was good-looking and pleasant, and had nice ways in a house, and was altogether too valuable as a lover to be lost without many struggles. So she kept to her scheme, and at last she carried it into execution.

MMrs. Burton, you may remember, had a plan in her heart—a plan she thought about with a lot of anxiety, and one she couldn’t ask her husband's help with, knowing he would not only refuse to help but would completely disapprove. Still, she couldn’t shake it from her mind, believing it might help bring Harry Clavering and Florence together. Her husband had now completely condemned poor Harry and had judged him—not openly to Florence, but often in front of his wife. Cecilia, like many women, was more frustrated with the situation than with the man at fault—with the situation and with the woman who was blocking Florence's path. She would be more than willing to forgive Harry if he could just get things right in the end. He was good-looking and charming, had great manners at home, and was just too valuable as a partner to lose without a good fight. So, she stuck to her plan, and eventually, she put it into action.

She started alone from her house one morning, and getting into an omnibus at Brompton had herself put down on the rising ground in Piccadilly, opposite to the Green Park. Why she had hesitated to tell the omnibus-man to stop at Bolton Street can hardly be explained; but she had felt that there would be almost a declaration of guilt in naming that locality. So she got out on the little hill, and walked up in front of the Prime Minister's house,—as it was then,—and of the yellow palace built by one of our merchant princes, and turned into the street that was all but interdicted to her by her own conscience. She turned up Bolton Street, and with a trembling hand knocked at Lady Ongar's door.

She set out alone from her house one morning and took an omnibus from Brompton, getting off on the hill in Piccadilly, across from Green Park. It’s hard to explain why she didn’t just tell the driver to stop at Bolton Street; she felt that mentioning that place would almost be an admission of guilt. So, she got out on the small hill, walked in front of the Prime Minister's house—like it was at the time—and the yellow palace built by one of our merchant princes, then turned onto the street that her own conscience made her feel was almost off-limits. She walked up Bolton Street, and with a shaking hand, knocked on Lady Ongar's door.

Florence in the meantime was sitting alone in Onslow Terrace. She knew now that Harry was ill at Clavering,—that he was indeed very ill, though Mrs. Clavering had assured her that his illness was not dangerous. For Mrs. Clavering had written to herself,—addressing her with all the old familiarity and affection,—with a warmth of affection that was almost more than natural. It was clear that Mrs. Clavering knew nothing of Harry's sins. Or, might it not be possible, Cecilia had suggested, that Mrs. Clavering might have known, and have resolved potentially that those sins should be banished, and become ground for some beautifully sincere repentance? Ah, how sweet it would be to receive that wicked sheep back again into the sheepfold, and then to dock him a little of his wandering powers, to fix him with some pleasant clog, to tie him down as a prudent domestic sheep should be tied, and make him the pride of the flock! But all this had been part of Cecilia's scheme, and of that scheme poor Florence knew nothing. According to Florence's view Mrs. Clavering's letter was written under a mistake. Harry had kept his secret at home, and intended to keep it for the present. But there was the letter, and Florence felt that it was impossible for her to answer it without telling the whole truth. It was very painful to her to leave unanswered so kind a letter as that, and it was quite impossible that she should write of Harry in the old strain. "It will be best that I should tell her the whole," Florence had said, "and then I shall be saved the pain of any direct communication with him." Her brother, to whom Cecilia had repeated this, applauded his sister's resolution. "Let her face it and bear it, and live it down," he had said. "Let her do it at once, so that all this maudlin sentimentality may be at an end." But Cecilia would not accede to this, and as Florence was in truth resolved, and had declared her purpose plainly, Cecilia was driven to the execution of her scheme more quickly than she had intended. In the meantime, Florence took out her little desk and wrote her letter. In tears and an agony of spirit which none can understand but women who have been driven to do the same, was it written. Could she have allowed herself to express her thoughts with passion, it would have been comparatively easy; but it behoved her to be calm, to be very quiet in her words,—almost reticent even in the language which she chose, and to abandon her claim not only without a reproach, but almost without an allusion to her love. Whilst Cecilia was away, the letter was written, and re-written and copied; but Mrs. Burton was safe in this, that her sister-in-law had promised that the letter should not be sent till she had seen it.

Florence was sitting alone in Onslow Terrace. She now knew that Harry was sick at Clavering—very sick, even though Mrs. Clavering had assured her that his illness wasn’t serious. Mrs. Clavering had written to her, using all the old familiarity and affection, with a warmth that felt almost too much. It was clear that Mrs. Clavering was unaware of Harry's wrongdoings. Or, as Cecilia suggested, could it be possible that Mrs. Clavering did know and had decided that those wrongs should be forgiven and seen as an opportunity for some heartfelt repentance? Oh, how wonderful it would be to welcome that wayward sheep back into the fold, then hold back some of his wildness, give him some nice constraints, and turn him into the pride of the flock! But this was all part of Cecilia's plan, and poor Florence had no idea about it. From Florence's perspective, Mrs. Clavering's letter was based on a misunderstanding. Harry had kept his secret at home and meant to continue doing so for now. But there was the letter, and Florence felt it was impossible to reply without revealing the whole truth. It hurt her to leave such a kind letter unanswered, and it was completely impossible for her to write about Harry like she used to. "I should just tell her everything," Florence thought, "and then I can avoid any painful direct communication with him." Her brother, to whom Cecilia relayed this, praised his sister’s decision. "Let her confront it, endure it, and get through it," he said. "Let her do it now, so all this sappy sentimentality can end." But Cecilia didn’t agree with this, and since Florence was determined and had stated her intention clearly, Cecilia was driven to carry out her plan sooner than she had planned. Meanwhile, Florence took out her small desk and wrote her letter. It was written in tears and a deep emotional turmoil that only women who have faced similar situations can understand. If she could have allowed herself to write with passion, it would have been relatively easy; instead, she needed to remain calm, to choose her words carefully—almost to hold back in what she said, and to let go of her claims not just without reproach, but even without much reference to her feelings. While Cecilia was away, the letter was drafted, re-drafted, and copied; but Mrs. Burton was assured that her sister-in-law had promised the letter wouldn’t be sent until she had seen it.

Mrs. Burton, when she knocked at Lady Ongar's door, had a little note ready for the servant between her fingers. Her compliments to Lady Ongar, and would Lady Ongar oblige her by an interview. The note contained simply that, and nothing more; and when the servant took it from her, she declared her intention of waiting in the hall till she had received an answer. But she was shown into the dining-room, and there she remained for a quarter of an hour, during which time she was by no means comfortable. Probably Lady Ongar might refuse to receive her; but should that not be the case,—should she succeed in making her way into that lady's presence, how should she find the eloquence wherewith to plead her cause? At the end of the fifteen minutes, Lady Ongar herself opened the door and entered the room. "Mrs. Burton," she said, smiling, "I am really ashamed to have kept you so long; but open confession, they say, is good for the soul, and the truth is that I was not dressed." Then she led the way upstairs, and placed Mrs. Burton on a sofa, and placed herself in her own chair,—from whence she could see well, but in which she could not be well seen,—and stretched out the folds of her morning dress gracefully, and made her visitor thoroughly understand that she was at home and at her ease.

Mrs. Burton, when she knocked on Lady Ongar's door, had a little note ready for the servant between her fingers. Her compliments to Lady Ongar, and would Lady Ongar kindly grant her an interview? The note contained just that, and nothing more; and when the servant took it from her, she said she intended to wait in the hall until she got an answer. But she was shown into the dining room, where she stayed for a quarter of an hour, feeling quite uncomfortable. Lady Ongar might refuse to see her; but if that wasn't the case—if she managed to get in front of the lady, how could she find the right words to make her case? At the end of the fifteen minutes, Lady Ongar herself opened the door and walked into the room. "Mrs. Burton," she said with a smile, "I’m really sorry to have kept you waiting so long; but as they say, confession is good for the soul, and the truth is, I wasn’t dressed." Then she led the way upstairs, sat Mrs. Burton on a sofa, and took her own chair—from where she could see well but couldn’t be easily seen—and stretched out the folds of her morning dress gracefully, making sure her visitor understood that she was at home and comfortable.

We may, I think, surmise that Lady Ongar's open confession would do her soul but little good, as it lacked truth, which is the first requisite for all confessions. Lady Ongar had been sufficiently dressed to receive any visitor, but had felt that some special preparation was necessary for the reception of the one who had now come to her. She knew well who was Mrs. Burton, and surmised accurately the purpose for which Mrs. Burton had come. Upon the manner in which she now carried herself might hang the decision of the question which was so important to her,—whether that Phœbus in knickerbockers should or should not become lord of Ongar Park. To effect success now, she must maintain an ascendancy during this coming interview, and in the maintenance of all ascendancy, much depends on the outward man or woman; and she must think a little of the words she must use, and a little, too, of her own purpose. She was fully minded to get the better of Mrs. Burton if that might be possible, but she was not altogether decided on the other point. She wished that Harry Clavering might be her own. She would have wished to pension off that Florence Burton with half her wealth, had such pensioning been possible. But not the less did she entertain some half doubts whether it would not be well that she could abandon her own wishes, and give up her own hope of happiness. Of Mrs. Burton personally she had known nothing, and having expected to see a somewhat strong-featured and perhaps rather vulgar woman, and to hear a voice painfully indicative of a strong mind, she was agreeably surprised to find a pretty, mild lady, who from the first showed that she was half afraid of what she herself was doing. "I have heard your name, Mrs. Burton," said Lady Ongar, "from our mutual friend, Mr. Clavering, and I have no doubt you have heard mine from him also." This she said in accordance with the little plan which during those fifteen minutes she had laid down for her own guidance.

We can assume that Lady Ongar's open confession wouldn’t do her any good, as it lacked honesty, which is essential for all confessions. She had dressed well enough to receive any visitor, but felt she needed to prepare specifically for the arrival of the person who had just come to see her. She knew exactly who Mrs. Burton was and accurately guessed why she had come. The way she presented herself could determine a crucial question for her: whether that guy in knickerbockers should become the master of Ongar Park. To succeed now, she needed to maintain control during this meeting, and a lot hinges on appearances; she needed to think carefully about the words she would use and about her own intentions. She was determined to come out on top against Mrs. Burton if possible, but she wasn’t fully decided about her other goal. She wanted Harry Clavering to be hers. She would have liked to pay off that Florence Burton with half her wealth, if that had been doable. Yet she still had some doubts about whether it would be better to abandon her own wishes and give up her hopes for happiness. She didn’t know much about Mrs. Burton personally and, expecting to meet a strong-featured and possibly rather common woman, with a voice that would strongly convey a sharp mind, she was pleasantly surprised to find a pretty, gentle lady who, from the start, seemed a bit intimidated by her own actions. "I've heard your name, Mrs. Burton," Lady Ongar said, "from our mutual friend, Mr. Clavering, and I’m sure you’ve heard mine from him as well." She said this as part of the small plan she had put together during those fifteen minutes to guide her.

Mrs. Burton was surprised, and at first almost silenced, by this open mentioning of a name which she had felt that she would have the greatest difficulty in approaching. She said, however, that it was so. She had heard Lady Ongar's name from Mr. Clavering. "We are connected, you know," said Lady Ongar. "My sister is married to his first-cousin, Sir Hugh; and when I was living with my sister at Clavering, he was at the rectory there. That was before my own marriage." She was perfectly easy in her manner, and flattered herself that the ascendancy was complete.

Mrs. Burton was shocked, and at first nearly speechless, by the direct mention of a name she felt she would struggle to bring up. Still, she replied that it was true. She had heard Lady Ongar's name from Mr. Clavering. "We're connected, you know," Lady Ongar said. "My sister is married to his first cousin, Sir Hugh; and when I was living with my sister in Clavering, he was at the rectory there. That was before I got married." She was completely relaxed in her manner and convinced that she had full control of the situation.

"I have heard as much from Mr. Clavering," said Cecilia.

"I've heard that from Mr. Clavering," Cecilia said.

"And he was very civil to me immediately on my return home. Perhaps you may have heard that also. He took this house for me, and made himself generally useful, as young men ought to do. I believe he is in the same office with your husband; is he not? I hope I may not have been the means of making him idle?"

"And he was really polite to me right when I got back home. Maybe you’ve heard about that too. He got this house for me and helped out in general, like young guys are supposed to do. I think he works in the same office as your husband; doesn’t he? I hope I haven’t made him lazy?"

This was all very well and very pretty, but Mrs. Burton was already beginning to feel that she was doing nothing towards the achievement of her purpose. "I suppose he has been idle," she said, "but I did not mean to trouble you about that." Upon hearing this, Lady Ongar smiled. This supposition that she had really intended to animadvert upon Harry Clavering's idleness was amusing to her as she remembered how little such idleness would signify if she could only have her way.

This was all nice and lovely, but Mrs. Burton was starting to feel like she wasn't making any progress toward her goal. "I guess he's been lazy," she said, "but I didn't mean to bother you about that." When Lady Ongar heard this, she smiled. The idea that Mrs. Burton was actually trying to criticize Harry Clavering's laziness amused her, especially since she realized how insignificant that laziness would be if she could just have things her way.

"Poor Harry!" she said. "I supposed his sins would be laid at my door. But my idea is, you know, that he never will do any good at such work as that."

"Poor Harry!" she said. "I figured his mistakes would be blamed on me. But my belief is, you know, that he will never make anything of himself with work like that."

"Perhaps not;—that is, I really can't say. I don't think Mr. Burton has ever expressed any such opinion; and if he had—"

"Maybe not; I honestly can't say. I don't believe Mr. Burton has ever shared any such opinion; and if he had—"

"If he had, you wouldn't mention it."

"If he did, you wouldn't bring it up."

"I don't suppose I should, Lady Ongar;—not to a stranger."

"I guess I shouldn’t, Lady Ongar;—not to someone I don’t know."

"Harry Clavering and I are not strangers," said Lady Ongar, changing the tone of her voice altogether as she spoke.

"Harry Clavering and I aren't strangers," Lady Ongar said, completely changing her tone as she spoke.

"No; I know that. You have known him longer than we have. I am aware of that."

"No, I get it. You've known him longer than we have. I'm aware of that."

"Yes; before he ever dreamed of going into your husband's business, Mrs. Burton; long before he had ever been to—Stratton."

"Yes; before he ever thought about getting into your husband's business, Mrs. Burton; long before he had ever been to—Stratton."

The name of Stratton was an assistance to Cecilia, and seemed to have been spoken with the view of enabling her to commence her work. "Yes," she said, "but nevertheless he did go to Stratton. He went to Stratton, and there he became acquainted with my sister-in-law, Florence Burton."

The name Stratton helped Cecilia, and it seemed to be mentioned to give her a start on her work. "Yes," she said, "but still, he did go to Stratton. He went to Stratton, and that's where he met my sister-in-law, Florence Burton."

"I am aware of it, Mrs. Burton."

"I know about it, Mrs. Burton."

"And he also became engaged to her."

"And he also got engaged to her."

"I am aware of that too. He has told me as much himself."

"I know that too. He told me himself."

"And has he told you whether he means to keep, or to break that engagement?"

"And has he told you if he plans to keep or break that engagement?"

"Ah, Mrs. Burton, is that question fair? Is it fair either to him, or to me? If he has taken me into his confidence and has not taken you, should I be doing well to betray him? Or if there can be anything in such a secret specially interesting to myself, why should I be made to tell it to you?"

"Ah, Mrs. Burton, is that question fair? Is it fair to him or to me? If he has trusted me and hasn’t trusted you, would it be right for me to betray him? And if there's something in that secret that’s particularly interesting to me, why should I have to share it with you?"

"I think the truth is always the best, Lady Ongar."

"I believe the truth is always the best, Lady Ongar."

"Truth is always better than a lie;—so at least people say, though they sometimes act differently; but silence may be better than either."

"Truth is always better than a lie; at least that's what people say, even though they sometimes behave differently; but sometimes silence might be better than both."

"This is a matter, Lady Ongar, in which I cannot be silent. I hope you will not be angry with me for coming to you,—or for asking you these questions—"

"This is something I can't stay quiet about, Lady Ongar. I hope you won't be upset with me for approaching you—or for asking you these questions—"

"O dear, no."

"Oh no."

"But I cannot be silent. My sister-in-law must at any rate know what is to be her fate."

"But I can’t stay quiet. My sister-in-law has to know what her future holds."

"Then why do you not ask him?"

"Then why don't you ask him?"

"He is ill at present."

"He's sick right now."

"Ill! Where is he ill? Who says he is ill?" And Lady Ongar, though she did not quite leave her chair, raised herself up and forgot all her preparations. "Where is he, Mrs. Burton? I have not heard of his illness."

"Ill! Where is he sick? Who says he's sick?" And Lady Ongar, although she didn't completely leave her chair, sat up and forgot all her plans. "Where is he, Mrs. Burton? I haven't heard about his illness."

"He is at Clavering;—at the parsonage."

"He's at Clavering; at the parsonage."

"I have heard nothing of this. What ails him? If he be really ill, dangerously ill, I conjure you to tell me. But pray tell me the truth. Let there be no tricks in such a matter as this."

"I haven't heard anything about this. What's wrong with him? If he's really sick, seriously sick, please tell me. But I want you to be honest. No games about something like this."

"Tricks, Lady Ongar!"

"Gotcha, Lady Ongar!"

"If Harry Clavering be ill, tell me what ails him. Is he in danger?"

"If Harry Clavering is sick, tell me what's wrong with him. Is he in danger?"

"His mother in writing to Florence says that he is not in danger; but that he is confined to the house. He has been taken by some fever." On that very morning Lady Ongar had received a letter from her sister, begging her to come to Clavering Park during the absence of Sir Hugh; but in the letter no word had been said as to Harry's illness. Had he been seriously, or at least dangerously ill, Hermione would certainly have mentioned it. All this flashed across Julia's mind as these tidings about Harry reached her. If he were not really in danger, or even if he were, why should she betray her feeling before this woman? "If there had been much in it," she said, resuming her former position and manners, "I should no doubt have heard of it from my sister."

"His mother wrote to Florence saying that he’s not in danger; he’s just stuck at home. He’s come down with some fever." That very morning, Lady Ongar had gotten a letter from her sister, asking her to come to Clavering Park while Sir Hugh was away; but the letter didn’t mention anything about Harry’s illness. If he were seriously or even dangerously ill, Hermione would have definitely mentioned it. All of this flashed through Julia’s mind as she heard the news about Harry. If he wasn’t really in danger, or even if he was, why should she show her feelings in front of this woman? "If there had been much to it," she said, going back to her previous demeanor and attitude, "I’m sure I would have heard about it from my sister."

"We hear that it is not dangerous," continued Mrs. Burton; "but he is away, and we cannot see him. And, in truth, Lady Ongar, we cannot see him any more until we know that he means to deal honestly by us."

"We hear that it’s not dangerous,” continued Mrs. Burton; “but he’s away, and we can’t see him. And, really, Lady Ongar, we can’t see him anymore until we know that he plans to be honest with us."

"Am I the keeper of his honesty?"

"Am I the one responsible for his honesty?"

"From what I have heard, I think you are. If you will tell me that I have heard falsely, I will go away and beg your pardon for my intrusion. But if what I have heard be true, you must not be surprised that I show this anxiety for the happiness of my sister. If you knew her, Lady Ongar, you would know that she is too good to be thrown aside with indifference."

"From what I've heard, I believe you are. If you tell me that I've heard incorrectly, I’ll leave and apologize for my intrusion. But if what I've heard is true, you shouldn't be surprised that I'm concerned about my sister’s happiness. If you knew her, Lady Ongar, you would understand that she deserves better than to be treated with indifference."

"Harry Clavering tells me that she is an angel,—that she is perfect."

"Harry Clavering says she’s an angel—that she’s perfect."

"And if he loves her, will it not be a shame that they should be parted?"

"And if he loves her, wouldn't it be a shame for them to be separated?"

"I said nothing about his loving her. Men are not always fond of perfection. The angels may be too angelic for this world."

"I didn’t say anything about him loving her. Men don’t always like perfection. Sometimes, angels can be too perfect for this world."

"He did love her."

"He loved her."

"So I suppose;—or at any rate he thought that he did."

"So I guess;—or at least he thought he did."

"He did love her, and I believe he loves her still."

"He loved her, and I believe he still loves her."

"He has my leave to do so, Mrs. Burton."

"He has my permission to do that, Mrs. Burton."

Cecilia, though she was somewhat afraid of the task which she had undertaken, and was partly awed by Lady Ongar's style of beauty and demeanour, nevertheless felt that if she still hoped to do any good, she must speak the truth out at once. She must ask Lady Ongar whether she held herself to be engaged to Harry Clavering. If she did not do this, nothing could come of the present interview.

Cecilia, although she was a bit scared of the task she had taken on and was partly intimidated by Lady Ongar's beauty and presence, still felt that if she wanted to make any difference, she had to speak the truth right away. She needed to ask Lady Ongar whether she considered herself engaged to Harry Clavering. If she didn't do this, the current conversation would lead nowhere.

"You say that, Lady Ongar, but do you mean it?" she asked. "We have been told that you also are engaged to marry Mr. Clavering."

"You say that, Lady Ongar, but do you really mean it?" she asked. "We've heard that you're also engaged to marry Mr. Clavering."

"Who has told you so?"

"Who told you that?"

"We have heard it. I have heard it, and have been obliged to tell my sister that I had done so."

"We’ve heard it. I’ve heard it, and I had to tell my sister that I did."

"And who told you? Did you hear it from Harry Clavering himself?"

"And who told you? Did you hear it directly from Harry Clavering?"

"I did. I heard it in part from him."

"I did. I heard some of it from him."

"Then why have you come beyond him to me? He must know. If he has told you that he is engaged to marry me, he must also have told you that he does not intend to marry Miss Florence Burton. It is not for me to defend him or to accuse him. Why do you come to me?"

"Then why have you come to me instead of him? He has to know. If he told you he’s engaged to marry me, he must have also mentioned that he doesn’t plan to marry Miss Florence Burton. It’s not my place to defend him or accuse him. Why are you here?"

"For mercy and forbearance," said Mrs. Burton, rising from her seat and coming over to the side of the room in which Lady Ongar was seated.

"For kindness and patience," said Mrs. Burton, getting up from her seat and walking over to the side of the room where Lady Ongar was sitting.

A plea for mercy.
A plea for mercy. Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"And Miss Burton has sent you?"

"And Miss Burton texted you?"

"No; she does not know that I am here; nor does my husband know it. No one knows it. I have come to tell you that before God this man is engaged to become the husband of Florence Burton. She has learned to love him, and has now no other chance of happiness."

"No; she doesn't know I'm here; and neither does my husband. No one knows it. I've come to tell you that before God, this man is set to be Florence Burton's husband. She has learned to love him and now has no other chance for happiness."

"But what of his happiness?"

"But what about his happiness?"

"Yes; we are bound to think of that. Florence is bound to think of that above all things."

"Yes, we have to consider that. Florence has to think about that more than anything else."

"And so am I. I love him too;—as fondly, perhaps, as she can do. I loved him first, before she had even heard his name."

"And so do I. I love him too;—maybe just as much as she does. I loved him first, before she even knew his name."

"But, Lady Ongar—"

"But, Lady Ongar—"

"Yes; you may ask the question if you will, and I will answer it truly." They were both standing now and confronting each other. "Or I will answer it without your asking it. I was false to him. I would not marry him because he was poor; and then I married another because he was rich. All that is true. But it does not make me love him the less now. I have loved him through it all. Yes; you are shocked, but it is true. I have loved him through it all. And what am I to do now, if he still loves me? I can give him wealth now."

"Yes, you can ask the question if you want, and I’ll answer it honestly." They were both standing now, facing each other. "Or I’ll answer it without you even asking. I was unfaithful to him. I wouldn’t marry him because he was poor, and then I married someone else because he was rich. That’s all true. But it doesn’t mean I love him any less now. I’ve loved him through all of this. Yes, you’re shocked, but it's the truth. I’ve loved him all this time. And what am I supposed to do now if he still loves me? I can offer him wealth now."

"Wealth will not make him happy."

"Money won't make him happy."

"It has not made me happy; but it may help to do so with him. But with me at any rate there can be no doubt. It is his happiness to which I am bound to look. Mrs. Burton, if I thought that I could make him happy, and if he would come to me, I would marry him to-morrow, though I broke your sister's heart by doing so. But if I felt that she could do so more than I, I would leave him to her, though I broke my own. I have spoken to you very openly. Will she say as much as that?"

"It hasn’t made me happy, but it might help him be happy. As for me, there’s no question about it. I need to focus on his happiness. Mrs. Burton, if I believed I could make him happy and he would come to me, I would marry him tomorrow, even if it meant breaking your sister's heart. But if I felt she could make him happier than I could, I would leave him to her, even if it meant breaking my own heart. I've been very straightforward with you. Will she be as honest?"

"She would act in that way. I do not know what she would say."

"She would behave like that. I’m not sure what she would say."

"Then let her do so, and leave him to be the judge of his own happiness. Let her pledge herself that no reproaches shall come from her, and I will pledge myself equally. It was I who loved him first, and it is I who have brought him into this trouble. I owe him everything. Had I been true to him, he would never have thought of, never have seen, Miss Florence Burton."

"Then let her do that, and let him decide for himself what makes him happy. Let her promise that she won’t blame him, and I will promise the same. I loved him first, and I’m the one who got him into this mess. I owe him everything. If I had been loyal to him, he would never have considered, never have noticed, Miss Florence Burton."

All that was, no doubt, true, but it did not touch the question of Florence's right. The fact on which Mrs. Burton wished to insist, if only she knew how, was this, that Florence had not sinned at all, and that Florence therefore ought not to bear any part of the punishment. It might be very true that Harry's fault was to be excused in part because of Lady Ongar's greater and primary fault;—but why should Florence be the scapegoat?

All of that was certainly true, but it didn’t address the issue of Florence’s rights. The point that Mrs. Burton wanted to make, if only she could express it, was this: Florence had done nothing wrong and therefore shouldn’t have to endure any of the consequences. It might be true that Harry’s wrongdoing could be partly excused due to Lady Ongar’s larger and primary fault; but why should Florence have to take the blame?

"You should think of his honour as well as his happiness," said Mrs. Burton at last.

"You should consider his reputation as well as his happiness," Mrs. Burton finally said.

"That is rather severe, Mrs. Burton, considering that it is said to me in my own house. Am I so low as that, that his honour will be tarnished if I become his wife?" But she, in saying this, was thinking of things of which Mrs. Burton knew nothing.

"That's quite harsh, Mrs. Burton, especially since it's being said in my own home. Am I really so beneath him that his reputation will suffer if I become his wife?" But as she said this, she was thinking of things that Mrs. Burton had no idea about.

"His honour will be tarnished," said she, "if he do not marry her whom he has promised to marry. He was welcomed by her father and mother to their house, and then he made himself master of her heart. But it was not his till he had asked for it, and had offered his own and his hand in return for it. Is he not bound to keep his promise? He cannot be bound to you after any such fashion as that. If you are solicitous for his welfare, you should know that if he would live with the reputation of a gentleman, there is only one course open to him."

"His reputation will be ruined," she said, "if he doesn't marry the woman he promised to marry. Her parents welcomed him into their home, and he captured her heart. But it wasn't truly his until he asked for it and offered his own heart and hand in exchange. Isn't he obligated to keep his promise? He can't be tied to you in any way like that. If you care about his well-being, you should realize that if he wants to maintain his status as a gentleman, he has only one option."

"It is the old story," said Lady Ongar; "the old story! Has not somebody said that the gods laugh at the perjuries of lovers? I do not know that men are inclined to be much more severe than the gods. These broken hearts are what women are doomed to bear."

"It’s the same old story," said Lady Ongar; "the same old story! Hasn’t someone said that the gods laugh at the lies of lovers? I don’t think men are much harsher than the gods. These broken hearts are what women are doomed to endure."

"And that is to be your answer to me, Lady Ongar?"

"And that's your answer to me, Lady Ongar?"

"No; that is not my answer to you. That is the excuse that I make for Harry Clavering. My answer to you has been very explicit. Pardon me if I say that it has been more explicit than you had any right to expect. I have told you that I am prepared to take any step that may be most conducive to the happiness of the man whom I once injured, but whom I have always loved. I will do this, let it cost myself what it may; and I will do this let the cost to any other woman be what it may. You cannot expect that I should love another woman better than myself." She said this, still standing, not without something more than vehemence in her tone. In her voice, in her manner, and in her eye there was that which amounted almost to ferocity. She was declaring that some sacrifice must be made, and that she recked little whether it should be of herself or of another. As she would immolate herself without hesitation, if the necessity should exist, so would she see Florence Burton destroyed without a twinge of remorse, if the destruction of Florence would serve the purpose which she had in view. You and I, O reader, may feel that the man for whom all this was to be done was not worth the passion. He had proved himself to be very far from such worth. But the passion, nevertheless, was there, and the woman was honest in what she was saying.

"No; that’s not my answer to you. That’s the excuse I make for Harry Clavering. My answer to you has been very clear. Forgive me for saying it has been clearer than you had any right to expect. I’ve told you that I’m ready to take any step that will bring happiness to the man I once hurt, but whom I have always loved. I will do this, no matter the cost to myself; and I will do this, no matter the cost to any other woman. You can't expect me to love another woman more than myself." She said this while still standing, with more than just intensity in her tone. In her voice, in her manner, and in her eyes, there was something that bordered on ferocity. She was declaring that some sacrifice had to be made, and she cared little whether it would be her own or that of someone else. Just as she would sacrifice herself without hesitation if it came to that, she would also watch Florence Burton be destroyed without feeling any remorse, if doing so would serve her purpose. You and I, dear reader, might feel that the man for whom all this was done wasn’t worth such passion. He had proven to be far from deserving. But still, the passion was there, and the woman was genuine in what she was saying.

After this Mrs. Burton got herself out of the room as soon as she found an opening which allowed her to go. In making her farewell speech, she muttered some indistinct apology for the visit which she had been bold enough to make. "Not at all," said Lady Ongar. "You have been quite right;—you are fighting your battle for the friend you love bravely; and were it not that the cause of the battle must, I fear, separate us hereafter, I should be proud to know one who fights so well for her friends. And when all this is over and has been settled, in whatever way it may be settled, let Miss Burton know from me that I have been taught to hold her name and character in the highest possible esteem." Mrs. Burton made no attempt at further speech, but left the room with a low curtsey.

After that, Mrs. Burton got out of the room as soon as she found an opening. While making her farewell, she muttered some vague apology for the visit she had dared to make. "Not at all," said Lady Ongar. "You’ve done the right thing; you’re fighting bravely for the friend you love, and if it weren’t for the fact that this battle's cause will, I’m afraid, separate us in the future, I would be proud to know someone who fights so well for her friends. And when all of this is over and settled, no matter how it turns out, let Miss Burton know from me that I have come to hold her name and character in the highest possible regard." Mrs. Burton didn’t try to say anything else but left the room with a slight curtsey.

Till she found herself out in the street, she was unable to think whether she had done most harm or most good by her visit to Bolton Street,—whether she had in any way served Florence, or whether she had simply confessed to Florence's rival the extent of her sister's misery. That Florence herself would feel the latter to be the case, when she should know it all, Mrs. Burton was well aware. Her own ears had tingled with shame as Harry Clavering had been discussed as a grand prize for which her sister was contending with another woman,—and contending with so small a chance of success. It was terrible to her that any woman dear to her should seem to seek for a man's love. And the audacity with which Lady Ongar had proclaimed her own feelings had been terrible also to Cecilia. She was aware that she was meddling with things which were foreign to her nature, and which would be odious to her husband. But yet, was not the battle worth fighting? It was not to be endured that Florence should seek after this thing; but, after all, the possession of the thing in question was the only earthly good that could give any comfort to poor Florence. Even Cecilia, with all her partiality for Harry, felt that he was not worth the struggle; but it was for her now to estimate him at the price which Florence might put upon him,—not at her own price.

Until she found herself out on the street, she couldn't decide whether her visit to Bolton Street had done more harm than good—whether she had helped Florence in any way or simply revealed her sister's misery to her rival. Mrs. Burton knew that Florence would likely feel it was the latter when she learned the whole truth. Her ears had burned with shame while Harry Clavering was talked about as a great prize for which her sister was competing against another woman—and with such slim chances of winning. It was heartbreaking for her that anyone she cared about appeared to be chasing after a man's love. The boldness with which Lady Ongar had expressed her feelings was also shocking to Cecilia. She realized she was getting involved in matters that were outside her nature and would be repugnant to her husband. But wasn’t the fight worth it? It was unacceptable that Florence should pursue this; yet, ultimately, the possession of this thing was the only earthly good that could provide any comfort to poor Florence. Even Cecilia, despite her bias toward Harry, felt that he wasn't worth the struggle; but now it was up to her to value him at the price Florence might assign—not her own.

But she must tell Florence what had been done, and tell her on that very day of her meeting with Lady Ongar. In no other way could she stop that letter which she knew that Florence would have already written to Mrs. Clavering. And could she now tell Florence that there was ground for hope? Was it not the fact that Lady Ongar had spoken the simple and plain truth when she had said that Harry must be allowed to choose the course which appeared to him to be the best for him? It was hard, very hard, that it should be so. And was it not true also that men, as well as gods, excuse the perjuries of lovers? She wanted to have back Harry among them as one to be forgiven easily, to be petted much, and to be loved always; but, in spite of the softness of her woman's nature, she wished that he might be punished sorely if he did not so return. It was grievous to her that he should any longer have a choice in the matter. Heavens and earth! was he to be allowed to treat a woman as he had treated Florence, and was nothing to come of it? In spite both of gods and men, the thing was so grievous to Cecilia Burton, that she could not bring herself to acknowledge that it was possible. Such things had not been done in the world which she had known.

But she had to tell Florence what had happened, and she needed to do it on the very day she met with Lady Ongar. There was no other way to stop that letter she knew Florence would have already written to Mrs. Clavering. And could she now tell Florence there was hope? Was it not true that Lady Ongar had spoken the plain truth when she said that Harry must be allowed to choose what he thought was best for him? It was hard, very hard, that it had to be that way. And wasn't it also true that men, like the gods, forgive the lies of lovers? She wanted Harry back among them, easily forgiven, treated with affection, and loved forever; but despite her gentle nature, she secretly wished he could be severely punished if he didn't come back that way. It pained her that he still had a choice in this matter. Good heavens! Was he really allowed to treat a woman like he had treated Florence, with no consequences? Despite the expectations of gods and men, it was so distressing to Cecilia Burton that she couldn't accept it as possible. Such things hadn't happened in the world she knew.

She walked the whole way home to Brompton, and had hardly perfected any plan when she reached her own door. If only Florence would allow her to write the letter to Mrs. Clavering, perhaps something might be done in that way. So she entered the house prepared to tell the story of her morning's work.

She walked all the way home to Brompton and had barely come up with any plan by the time she reached her front door. If only Florence would let her write the letter to Mrs. Clavering, maybe something could be figured out that way. So, she went into the house ready to share the story of her morning's work.

And she must tell it also to her husband in the evening! It had been hard to do the thing without his knowing of it beforehand; but it would be impossible to her to keep the thing a secret from him, now that it was done.

And she also had to tell her husband in the evening! It had been hard to do this without him knowing about it beforehand; but now that it was done, it would be impossible for her to keep it a secret from him.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXVIII.

HOW TO DISPOSE OF A WIFE.

When Sir Hugh came up to town there did not remain to him quite a week before the day on which he was to leave the coast of Essex in Jack Stuart's yacht for Norway, and he had a good deal to do in the meantime in the way of provisioning the boat. Fortnum and Mason, no doubt, would have done it all for him without any trouble on his part, but he was not a man to trust any Fortnum or any Mason as to the excellence of the article to be supplied, or as to the price. He desired to have good wine,—very good wine; but he did not desire to pay a very high price. No one knew better than Sir Hugh that good wine cannot be bought cheap,—but things may be costly and yet not dear; or they may be both. To such matters Sir Hugh was wont to pay very close attention himself. He had done something in that line before he left London, and immediately on his return he went to the work again, summoning Archie to his assistance, but never asking Archie's opinion,—as though Archie had been his head-butler.

When Sir Hugh arrived in town, he had just under a week before he was set to leave Essex on Jack Stuart's yacht for Norway, and he had a lot to do in the meantime to stock the boat. Fortnum and Mason could have taken care of everything for him without any hassle, but he wasn’t the type to trust Fortnum or Mason when it came to the quality of what they supplied or the price. He wanted good wine—really good wine—but didn’t want to pay a high price for it. Sir Hugh knew better than anyone that good wine isn’t cheap, but things can be expensive and still not be worth it, or they can be both. He paid close attention to those matters himself. He had already taken care of some of this before leaving London, and as soon as he got back, he jumped right into it again, bringing Archie in to help but never asking for Archie’s opinion—as if Archie were his head butler.

Immediately on his arrival in London he cross-questioned his brother as to his marriage prospects. "I suppose you are going with us?" Hugh said to Archie, as he caught him in the hall of the house in Berkeley Square on the morning after his arrival.

Immediately upon his arrival in London, he grilled his brother about his marriage prospects. "I guess you’re coming with us?" Hugh asked Archie as he caught him in the hallway of the house in Berkeley Square the morning after his arrival.

"O dear, yes," said Archie. "I thought that was quite understood. I have been getting my traps together." The getting of his traps together had consisted in the ordering of a sailor's jacket with brass buttons, and three pair of white duck trousers.

"O dear, yes," said Archie. "I thought that was pretty clear. I've been getting my stuff ready." Gathering his stuff had meant ordering a sailor's jacket with brass buttons and three pairs of white duck trousers.

"All right," said Sir Hugh. "You had better come with me into the City this morning. I am going to Boxall's in Great Thames Street."

"Okay," said Sir Hugh. "You should come with me to the City this morning. I'm heading to Boxall's on Great Thames Street."

"Are you going to breakfast here?" asked Archie.

"Are you having breakfast here?" asked Archie.

"No; you can come to me at the Union in about an hour. I suppose you have never plucked up courage to ask Julia to marry you?"

"No; you can meet me at the Union in about an hour. I guess you’ve never mustered up the courage to ask Julia to marry you?"

"Yes, I did," said Archie.

"Yeah, I did," said Archie.

"And what answer did you get?" Archie had found himself obliged to repudiate with alacrity the attack upon his courage which his brother had so plainly made; but, beyond that, the subject was one which was not pleasing to him. "Well, what did she say to you?" asked his brother, who had no idea of sparing Archie's feelings in such a matter.

"And what did she say?" Archie felt he had to quickly dismiss the attack on his bravery that his brother had obviously made; however, the topic was not one he enjoyed discussing. "So, what did she say to you?" his brother asked, showing no intention of being considerate of Archie's feelings in the situation.

"She said;—indeed I don't remember exactly what it was that she did say."

"She said;—honestly, I don't remember exactly what she said."

"But she refused you?"

"But she turned you down?"

"Yes;—she refused me. I think she wanted me to understand that I had come to her too soon after Ongar's death."

"Yeah; she turned me down. I think she wanted me to realize that I had approached her too soon after Ongar's death."

"Then she must be an infernal hypocrite;—that's all." But of any hypocrisy in this matter the reader will acquit Lady Ongar, and will understand that Archie had merely lessened the severity of his own fall by a clever excuse. After that the two brothers went to Boxall's in the City, and Archie, having been kept fagging all day, was sent in the evening to dine by himself at his own club.

"Then she must be an absolute hypocrite—that's all." However, the reader will clear Lady Ongar of any hypocrisy in this situation and will see that Archie simply reduced the impact of his own mistakes with a clever excuse. After that, the two brothers went to Boxall's in the City, and since Archie had been busy all day, he was sent to have dinner alone at his club that evening.

Sir Hugh also was desirous of seeing Lady Ongar, and had caused his wife to say as much in that letter which she wrote to her sister. In this way an appointment had been made without any direct intercourse between Sir Hugh and his sister-in-law. They two had never met since the day on which Sir Hugh had given her away in Clavering Church. To Hugh Clavering, who was by no means a man of sentiment, this signified little or nothing. When Lady Ongar had returned a widow, and when evil stories against her had been rife, he had thought it expedient to have nothing to do with her. He did not himself care much about his sister-in-law's morals; but should his wife become much complicated with a sister damaged in character there might come of it trouble and annoyance. Therefore, he had resolved that Lady Ongar should be dropped. But during the last few months things had in some respects changed. The Courton people,—that is to say, Lord Ongar's family,—had given Hugh Clavering to understand that, having made inquiry, they were disposed to acquit Lady Ongar, and to declare their belief that she was subject to no censure. They did not wish themselves to know her, as no intimacy between them could now be pleasant; but they had felt it to be incumbent on them to say as much as that to Sir Hugh. Sir Hugh had not even told his wife, but he had twice suggested that Lady Ongar should be asked to Clavering Park. In answer to both these invitations, Lady Ongar had declined to go to Clavering Park.

Sir Hugh also wanted to see Lady Ongar and had his wife mention it in the letter she wrote to her sister. This way, an arrangement was made without any direct communication between Sir Hugh and his sister-in-law. They hadn't met since the day Sir Hugh gave her away in Clavering Church. To Hugh Clavering, who wasn't sentimental at all, this meant little or nothing. When Lady Ongar returned as a widow and various rumors about her circulated, he thought it best to avoid her. He didn't personally care much about his sister-in-law's reputation, but if his wife got too involved with someone whose character was in question, it could lead to trouble and annoyance. So, he decided to distance himself from Lady Ongar. However, over the past few months, things had changed in some ways. The Courton family—Lord Ongar's relatives—had let Hugh Clavering know that, after looking into the matter, they were willing to clear Lady Ongar and believed she deserved no blame. They didn’t want to have a relationship with her, as any closeness would be uncomfortable, but they felt it was important to communicate this to Sir Hugh. Sir Hugh hadn’t even told his wife, but he had suggested twice that Lady Ongar be invited to Clavering Park. In response to both invitations, Lady Ongar had declined to come.

And now Sir Hugh had a commission on his hands from the same Courton people, which made it necessary that he should see his sister-in-law, and Julia had agreed to receive him. To him, who was very hard in such matters, the idea of his visit was not made disagreeable by any remembrance of his own harshness to the woman whom he was going to see. He cared nothing about that, and it had not occurred to him that she would care much. But, in truth, she did care very much, and when the hour was coming on which Sir Hugh was to appear, she thought much of the manner in which it would become her to receive him. He had condemned her in that matter as to which any condemnation is an insult to a woman; and he had so condemned her, being her brother-in-law and her only natural male friend. In her sorrow she should have been able to lean upon him; but from the first, without any inquiry, he had believed the worst of her, and had withdrawn from her altogether his support, when the slightest support from him would have been invaluable to her. Could she forgive this? Never; never! She was not a woman to wish to forgive such an offence. It was an offence which it would be despicable in her to forgive. Many had offended her, some had injured her, one or two had insulted her; but to her thinking, no one had so offended her, had so injured her, had so grossly insulted her, as he had done. In what way then would it become her to receive him? Before his arrival she had made up her mind on this subject, and had resolved that she would, at least, say no word of her own wrongs.

And now Sir Hugh had a job to do for the same Courton people, which meant he needed to see his sister-in-law, and Julia had agreed to meet him. For someone like him, who was usually pretty tough about these things, the thought of his visit wasn’t unpleasant due to any memories of how harshly he had treated her. He didn’t care about that, and it hadn’t crossed his mind that she would care much either. But in reality, she cared a lot, and as the time approached for Sir Hugh’s arrival, she thought a lot about how she should greet him. He had condemned her over a matter that is particularly insulting to a woman, and he had done so as her brother-in-law and her only natural male friend. During her difficult time, she should have been able to lean on him. However, from the very beginning, without asking her anything, he had assumed the worst about her and completely withdrew his support when even a little from him would have meant the world to her. Could she forgive him for this? Never; never! She wasn’t the kind of woman who wanted to forgive such an offense. It was something that would be shameful for her to forgive. Many had wronged her, some had hurt her, a few had insulted her; but in her eyes, no one had offended her, hurt her, or insulted her as much as he had. So how should she greet him? Before he arrived, she had decided about this and resolved that she would, at the very least, not say a word about her own wrongs.

"How do you do, Julia?" said Sir Hugh, walking into the room with a step which was perhaps unnaturally quick, and with his hand extended. Lady Ongar had thought of that too. She would give much to escape the touch of his hand, if it were possible; but she had told herself that she would best consult her own dignity by declaring no actual quarrel. So she put out her fingers and just touched his palm.

"How are you, Julia?" said Sir Hugh, walking into the room with a somewhat hurried step and extending his hand. Lady Ongar had considered this too. She would do a lot to avoid the touch of his hand, if she could; but she had convinced herself that it would be better for her dignity to not show any real conflict. So she reached out her fingers and lightly touched his palm.

"I hope Hermy is well?" she said.

"I hope Hermy is doing well?" she said.

"Pretty well, thank you. She is rather lonely since she lost her poor little boy, and would be very glad if you would go to her."

"Pretty well, thanks. She’s quite lonely since she lost her little boy, and she’d really appreciate it if you could visit her."

"I cannot do that; but if she would come to me I should be delighted."

"I can't do that; but if she would come to me, I would be very happy."

"You see it would not suit her to be in London so soon after Hughy's death."

"You see, it wouldn't be appropriate for her to be in London so soon after Hughy's death."

"I am not bound to London. I would go anywhere else,—except to Clavering."

"I’m not tied to London. I’d go anywhere else—except to Clavering."

"You never go to Ongar Park, I am told."

"You never go to Ongar Park, I'm told."

"I have been there."

"I've been there."

"But they say you do not intend to go again."

"But they say you don't plan to go again."

"Not at present, certainly. Indeed, I do not suppose I shall ever go there. I do not like the place."

"Not right now, for sure. In fact, I don’t think I’ll ever go there. I really don’t like the place."

"That's just what they have told me. It is about that—partly—that I want to speak to you. If you don't like the place, why shouldn't you sell your interest in it back to the family? They'd give you more than the value for it."

"That's exactly what they've told me. It's partly about that—why I want to talk to you. If you don't like the place, why not sell your share back to the family? They'd pay you more than it's worth."

"I do not know that I should care to sell it."

"I don't know if I really want to sell it."

"Why not, if you don't mean to use the house? I might as well explain at once what it is that has been said to me. John Courton, you know, is acting as guardian for the young earl, and they don't want to keep up so large a place as the Castle. Ongar Park would just suit Mrs. Courton,"—Mrs. Courton was the widowed mother of the young earl,—"and they would be very happy to buy your interest."

"Why not, if you don't plan to use the house? I might as well tell you what I've heard. John Courton is acting as guardian for the young earl, and they don’t want to maintain such a big place as the Castle. Ongar Park would be perfect for Mrs. Courton,"—Mrs. Courton is the young earl's widowed mother,—"and they'd be very happy to buy your share."

"Would not such a proposition come best through a lawyer?" said Lady Ongar.

"Wouldn't it be better to have a lawyer handle that proposal?" asked Lady Ongar.

"The fact is this,—they think they have been a little hard on you."

"The fact is this: they think they've been a bit tough on you."

"I have never accused them."

"I've never accused them."

"But they feel it themselves, and they think that you might take it perhaps amiss if they were to send you a simple message through an attorney. Courton told me that he would not have allowed any such proposition to be made, if you had seemed disposed to use the place. They wish to be civil, and all that kind of thing."

"But they feel it themselves, and they think you might take it the wrong way if they were to send you a simple message through a lawyer. Courton told me he wouldn't have allowed any such suggestion to be made if you had seemed interested in using the place. They want to be polite and all that sort of thing."

"Their civility or incivility is indifferent to me," said Julia.

"Their politeness or rudeness doesn't bother me," said Julia.

"But why shouldn't you take the money?"

"But why shouldn’t you take the money?"

"The money is equally indifferent to me."

"The money means just as little to me."

"You mean then to say that you won't listen to it? Of course they can't make you part with the place if you wish to keep it."

"You’re saying that you won’t listen to it? Of course, they can’t force you to leave the place if you want to stay."

"Not more than they can make you sell Clavering Park. I do not, however, wish to be uncivil, and I will let you know through my lawyer what I think about it. All such matters are best managed by lawyers."

"Not more than they can make you sell Clavering Park. I don’t want to be rude, though, so I’ll have my lawyer let you know what I think about it. It's best to handle all these things through lawyers."

After that Sir Hugh said nothing further about Ongar Park. He was well aware, from the tone in which Lady Ongar answered him, that she was averse to talk to him on that subject; but he was not conscious that his presence was otherwise disagreeable to her, or that she would resent any interference from him on any subject because he had been cruel to her. So after a little while he began again about Hermione. As the world had determined upon acquitting Lady Ongar, it would be convenient to him that the two sisters should be again intimate, especially as Julia was a rich woman. His wife did not like Clavering Park, and he certainly did not like Clavering Park himself. If he could once get the house shut up, he might manage to keep it shut for some years to come. His wife was now no more than a burden to him, and it would suit him well to put off the burden on to his sister-in-law's shoulders. It was not that he intended to have his wife altogether dependent on another person, but he thought that if they two were established together, in the first instance merely as a summer arrangement, such establishment might be made to assume some permanence. This would be very pleasant to him. Of course he would pay a portion of the expense,—as small a portion as might be possible,—but such a portion as might enable him to live with credit before the world.

After that, Sir Hugh didn’t bring up Ongar Park again. He knew from Lady Ongar's tone that she didn’t want to discuss it, but he didn’t realize that his presence bothered her or that she held a grudge against him for being cruel. So, after a while, he shifted the conversation back to Hermione. Since everyone had decided to clear Lady Ongar’s name, it would be helpful for him if the two sisters became close again, especially since Julia was wealthy. His wife didn’t like Clavering Park, and he certainly wasn’t a fan of it either. If he could get the house closed up, he might be able to keep it that way for years. His wife had become more of a burden to him, and it would work out well for him to offload that burden onto his sister-in-law. Not that he wanted his wife to be completely dependent on someone else, but he thought if they were settled together, at least initially as a summer thing, it could turn into something more permanent. That would make him happy. Of course, he would contribute to the costs—just a minimal amount—but enough to maintain a respectable image in front of others.

"I wish I could think that you and Hermy might be together while I am absent," he said.

"I wish I could believe that you and Hermy might be together while I'm away," he said.

"I shall be very happy to have her if she will come to me," Julia replied.

"I would be really happy to have her if she decides to come to me," Julia replied.

"What,—here, in London? I am not quite sure that she wishes to come up to London at present."

"What, here in London? I'm not totally sure she wants to come to London right now."

"I have never understood that she had any objection to being in town," said Lady Ongar.

"I've never understood why she would have a problem with being in town," said Lady Ongar.

"Not formerly, certainly; but now, since her boy's death—"

"Not before, certainly; but now, since her boy's death—

"Why should his death make more difference to her than to you?" To this question Sir Hugh made no reply. "If you are thinking of society, she could be nowhere safer from any such necessity than with me. I never go out anywhere. I have never dined out, or even spent an evening in company since Lord Ongar's death. And no one would come here to disturb her."

"Why should his death affect her more than it affects you?" Sir Hugh didn’t answer. "If you're worried about society, she couldn’t be in a safer place than with me. I hardly go out at all. I haven't dined out or even spent an evening with anyone since Lord Ongar died. And no one would come here to bother her."

"I didn't mean that."

"I didn't mean to say that."

"I don't quite know what you did mean. From different causes she and I are left pretty nearly equally without friends."

"I'm not really sure what you meant. For different reasons, she and I are both pretty much left without friends."

"Hermione is not left without friends," said Sir Hugh with a tone of offence.

"Hermione isn't without friends," Sir Hugh said, sounding offended.

"Were she not, she would not want to come to me. Your society is in London, to which she does not come, or in other country-houses than your own, to which she is not taken. She lives altogether at Clavering, and there is no one there, except your uncle."

"Were she not, she wouldn't want to see me. Her social circle is in London, where she doesn't go, or at other country houses besides yours, where she isn't invited. She spends all her time at Clavering, and the only person there is your uncle."

"Whatever neighbourhood there is she has,—just like other women."

"Whatever neighborhood she has, she’s just like other women."

"Just like some other women, no doubt. I shall remain in town for another month, and after that I shall go somewhere; I don't much care where. If Hermy will come to me as my guest I shall be most happy to have her. And the longer she will stay with me the better. Your coming home need make no difference, I suppose."

"Just like some other women, I'm sure. I’ll stay in town for another month, and after that, I’ll go somewhere; I don’t really care where. If Hermy wants to come and stay with me, I’d be really happy to have her. The longer she stays, the better. I assume your coming home won’t change anything."

There was a keenness of reproach in her tone as she spoke, which even he could not but feel and acknowledge. He was very thick-skinned to such reproaches, and would have left this unnoticed had it been possible. Had she continued speaking he would have done so. But she remained silent, and sat looking at him, saying with her eyes the same thing that she had already spoken with her words. Thus he was driven to speak. "I don't know," said he, "whether you intend that for a sneer."

There was a sharpness in her voice as she spoke, which even he couldn't ignore or deny. He was quite used to such criticisms and would have let it slide if he could. If she had kept talking, he would have done just that. But she stayed quiet and looked at him, conveying with her eyes what she had already said with her words. So he felt compelled to respond. "I don't know," he said, "if you're aiming that as a jab."

She was perfectly indifferent whether or no she offended him. Only that she had believed that the maintenance of her own dignity forbade it, she would have openly rebuked him, and told him that he was not welcome in her house. No treatment from her could, as she thought, be worse than he had deserved from her. His first enmity had injured her, but she could afford to laugh at his present anger. "It is hard to talk to you about Hermy without what you are pleased to call a sneer. You simply wish to rid yourself of her."

She didn’t care at all if she offended him. If she hadn’t believed that maintaining her own dignity prevented her from doing so, she would have called him out directly and told him he wasn’t welcome in her home. She thought no response from her could be worse than what he deserved from her. His initial hostility had hurt her, but she could easily laugh off his current anger. “It’s tough to talk to you about Hermy without what you like to call a sneer. You just want to get rid of her.”

"I wish no such thing, and you have no right to say so."

"I don’t want that at all, and you have no right to say that."

"At any rate you are ridding yourself of her society; and if under those circumstances she likes to come to me I shall be glad to receive her. Our life together will not be very cheerful, but neither she nor I ought to expect a cheerful life."

"Anyway, you're getting her out of your life; and if she wants to come to me under those circumstances, I'd be happy to have her. Our time together won't be very happy, but neither she nor I should expect a happy life."

He rose from his chair now with a cloud of anger upon his brow. "I can see how it is," said he; "because everything has not gone smooth with yourself you choose to resent it upon me. I might have expected that you would not have forgotten in whose house you met Lord Ongar."

He got up from his chair now with a frown of anger on his face. "I get it," he said; "just because things haven't gone well for you, you want to take it out on me. I should have known you wouldn't forget whose house you met Lord Ongar in."

"No, Hugh; I forget nothing; neither when I met him, nor how I married him, nor any of the events that have happened since. My memory, unfortunately, is very good."

"No, Hugh; I remember everything; from when I met him, to how I married him, and all the events that have happened since. My memory, unfortunately, is very sharp."

"I did all I could for you, and should have been safe from your insolence."

"I did everything I could for you, and I should have been protected from your disrespect."

"You should have continued to stay away from me, and you would have been quite safe. But our quarrelling in this way is foolish. We can never be friends,—you and I; but we need not be open enemies. Your wife is my sister, and I say again that if she likes to come to me, I shall be delighted to have her."

"You should have kept your distance from me, and you would have been just fine. But fighting like this is pointless. We can never be friends, you and I, but we don’t have to be outright enemies. Your wife is my sister, and I’ll say it again: if she wants to come visit me, I’d be happy to have her."

"My wife," said he, "will go to the house of no person who is insolent to me." Then he took his hat, and left the room without further word or sign of greeting. In spite of his calculations and caution as to money,—in spite of his well-considered arrangements and the comfortable provision for his future ease which he had proposed to himself, he was a man who had not his temper so much under control as to enable him to postpone his anger to his prudence. That little scheme for getting rid of his wife was now at an end. He would never permit her to go to her sister's house after the manner in which Julia had just treated him!

"My wife," he said, "will not visit anyone who's disrespectful to me." Then he grabbed his hat and left the room without another word or sign of acknowledgment. Despite his careful planning and concerns about money—despite his well-thought-out arrangements and the comfortable future he envisioned for himself—he was a man whose temper he could not control well enough to set aside his anger for the sake of being cautious. That little plan to get rid of his wife was over. He would never allow her to visit her sister's house after how Julia had just treated him!

When he was gone Lady Ongar walked about her own room smiling, and at first was well pleased with herself. She had received Archie's overture with decision, but at the same time with courtesy, for Archie was weak, and poor, and powerless. But she had treated Sir Hugh with scorn, and had been enabled to do so without the utterance of any actual reproach as to the wrongs which she herself had endured from him. He had put himself in her power, and she had not thrown away the opportunity. She had told him that she did not want his friendship, and would not be his friend; but she had done this without any loud abuse unbecoming to her either as a countess, a widow, or a lady. For Hermione she was sorry. Hermione now could hardly come to her. But even as to that she did not despair. As things were going on, it would become almost necessary that her sister and Sir Hugh should be parted. Both must wish it; and if this were arranged, then Hermione should come to her.

When he left, Lady Ongar walked around her room smiling, initially feeling quite pleased with herself. She had responded decisively but politely to Archie’s advances since he was weak, poor, and powerless. However, she had treated Sir Hugh with disdain, managing to do so without directly accusing him of the wrongs she had suffered at his hands. He had put himself at her mercy, and she didn’t waste the chance. She had told him that she didn’t want his friendship and wouldn’t be his friend, but she had done this without resorting to any loud insults that would be inappropriate for her as a countess, a widow, or a lady. She felt sorry for Hermione. Hermione could hardly visit her now. But even regarding that, she didn’t lose hope. As things were progressing, it would become almost necessary for her sister and Sir Hugh to separate. Both would likely want it; and if that happened, then Hermione could come to her.

But from this she soon came to think again about Harry Clavering. How was that matter to be decided, and what steps would it become her to take as to its decision? Sir Hugh had proposed to her that she should sell her interest in Ongar Park, and she had promised that she would make known her decision on that matter through her lawyer. As she had been saying this she was well aware that she would never sell the property;—but she had already resolved that she would at once give it back, without purchase-money, to the Ongar family, were it not kept that she might hand it over to Harry Clavering as a fitting residence for his lordship. If he might be there, looking after his cattle, going about with the steward subservient at his heels, ministering justice to the Enoch Gubbys and others, she would care nothing for the wants of any of the Courton people. But if such were not to be the destiny of Ongar Park,—if there were to be no such Adam in that Eden,—then the mother of the little lord might take herself thither, and revel among the rich blessings of the place without delay, and with no difficulty as to price. As to price,;—had she not already found the money-bag that had come to her to be too heavy for her hands?

But from this, she soon started to think again about Harry Clavering. How was that situation going to be resolved, and what actions should she take regarding its resolution? Sir Hugh had suggested that she sell her share in Ongar Park, and she had promised to let him know her decision about it through her lawyer. While saying this, she fully understood that she would never sell the property;—however, she had already decided that she would immediately return it, without any payment, to the Ongar family, unless it was kept so she could give it to Harry Clavering as a suitable home for him. If he could be there, tending to his cattle, going around with the steward trailing behind him, serving justice to Enoch Gubbys and others, she wouldn’t care at all about the needs of any of the Courton people. But if that wasn’t going to be the fate of Ongar Park,—if there was to be no such Adam in that Eden,—then the mother of the little lord could go there and enjoy all the rich blessings of the place without delay, and without worrying about the cost. As for the cost;—hadn’t she already found the money bag that had come to her to be too heavy for her hands?

But she could do nothing till that question was settled; and how was she to settle it? Every word that had passed between her and Cecilia Burton had been turned over and over in her mind, and she could only declare to herself as she had then declared to her visitor, that it must be as Harry should please. She would submit, if he required her submission; but she could not bring herself to take steps to secure her own misery.

But she couldn't do anything until that question was resolved; and how was she supposed to resolve it? Every word exchanged between her and Cecilia Burton had been replayed in her mind, and she could only tell herself, just like she told her visitor, that it had to be whatever Harry wanted. She would accept it if he demanded her acceptance; but she couldn't bring herself to take action that would ensure her own unhappiness.

 

 

CHAPTER XXXIX.

FAREWELL TO DOODLES.

At last came the day on which the two Claverings were to go down to Harwich and put themselves on board Jack Stuart's yacht. The hall of the house in Berkeley Square was strewed with portmanteaus, gun-cases, and fishing-rods, whereas the wine and packets of preserved meat, and the bottled beer and fish in tins, and the large box of cigars, and the prepared soups, had been sent down by Boxall, and were by this time on board the boat. Hugh and Archie were to leave London this day by train at 5 P.M., and were to sleep on board. Jack Stuart was already there, having assisted in working the yacht round from Brightlingsea.

At last, the day arrived for the two Claverings to head down to Harwich and board Jack Stuart's yacht. The hall of the house in Berkeley Square was filled with suitcases, gun cases, and fishing rods, while the wine, packs of preserved meat, bottled beer, canned fish, a large box of cigars, and prepared soups had already been sent down by Boxall and were now on the boat. Hugh and Archie were set to leave London that day by train at 5 P.M. and would be sleeping on board. Jack Stuart was already there, having helped sail the yacht over from Brightlingsea.

On that morning Archie had a farewell breakfast at his club with Doodles, and after that, having spent the intervening hours in the billiard-room, a farewell luncheon. There had been something of melancholy in this last day between the friends, originating partly in the failure of Archie's hopes as to Lady Ongar, and partly perhaps in the bad character which seemed to belong to Jack Stuart and his craft. "He has been at it for years, and always coming to grief," said Doodles. "He is just like a man I know, who has been hunting for the last ten years, and can't sit a horse at a fence yet. He has broken every bone in his skin, and I don't suppose he ever saw a good thing to a finish. He never knows whether hounds are in cover, or where they are. His only idea is to follow another man's red coat till he comes to grief;—and yet he will go on hunting. There are some people who never will understand what they can do, and what they can't." In answer to this, Archie reminded his friend that on this occasion Jack Stuart would have the advantage of an excellent dry-nurse, acknowledged to be very great on such occasions. Would not he, Archie Clavering, be there to pilot Jack Stuart and his boat? But, nevertheless, Doodles was melancholy, and went on telling stories about that unfortunate man who would continue to break his bones, though he had no aptitude for out-of-door sports. "He'll be carried home on a stretcher some day, you know," said Doodles.

On that morning, Archie had a farewell breakfast at his club with Doodles, and afterward, after spending the intervening hours in the billiard room, they had a farewell lunch. There was a certain sadness in this last day between the friends, partly because Archie’s hopes regarding Lady Ongar had fallen through, and maybe also because of the bad reputation that seemed to follow Jack Stuart and his scheming. “He’s been at it for years and always ends up in trouble,” said Doodles. “He reminds me of a guy I know who has been hunting for the last ten years and still can’t stay on a horse when it jumps. He’s broken every bone in his body, and I doubt he’s ever finished a good run. He never knows if hounds are in cover or where they are. His only plan is to follow another guy's red coat until he gets into trouble; yet he keeps hunting. Some people just never understand what they can do and what they can't.” In response, Archie pointed out that this time Jack Stuart would have the benefit of a great dry-nurse, acknowledged to be very good in such situations. Wouldn’t he, Archie Clavering, be there to guide Jack Stuart and his boat? Still, Doodles was downcast and continued to share stories about that unfortunate man who would keep breaking his bones, even though he had no talent for outdoor sports. “He’ll end up being carried home on a stretcher one of these days, you know,” Doodles said.

"What does it matter if he is?" said Archie, boldly, thinking of himself and of the danger predicted for him. "A man can only die once."

"What does it matter if he is?" Archie said confidently, reflecting on himself and the danger that had been predicted for him. "A person can only die once."

"I call it quite a tempting of Providence," said Doodles.

"I think it's a real challenge to fate," said Doodles.

But their conversation was chiefly about Lady Ongar and the Spy. It was only on this day that Doodles had learned that Archie had in truth offered his hand, and been rejected; and Captain Clavering was surprised by the extent of his friend's sympathy. "It's a doosed disagreeable thing,—a very disagreeable thing indeed," said Doodles. Archie, who did not wish to be regarded as specially unfortunate, declined to look at the matter in this light; but Doodles insisted. "It would cut me up like the very mischief," he said. "I know that; and the worst of it is, that perhaps you wouldn't have gone on, only for me. I meant it all for the best, old fellow. I did, indeed. There; that's the game to you. I'm playing uncommon badly this morning; but the truth is, I'm thinking of those women." Now as Doodles was playing for a little money, this was really civil on his part.

But their conversation was mainly about Lady Ongar and the Spy. It was only that day that Doodles had found out that Archie had actually proposed and been turned down; Captain Clavering was taken aback by how much sympathy his friend had. "It's a really terrible thing—truly terrible," said Doodles. Archie, who didn’t want to be seen as particularly unlucky, refused to view it that way; but Doodles wouldn’t let it go. "It would really get to me," he said. "I know that; and the worst part is that maybe you wouldn’t have kept going if it weren’t for me. I meant well, old buddy. I really did. There; that’s my take on it. I’m not playing very well this morning, but the truth is, I’m thinking about those women." Now, since Doodles was playing for a bit of money, this was actually pretty considerate of him.

And he would persevere in talking about the Spy, as though there were something in his remembrance of the lady which attracted him irresistibly to the subject. He had always boasted that in his interview with her he had come off with the victory, nor did he now cease to make such boasts; but still he spoke of her and her powers with an awe which would have completely opened the eyes of any one a little more sharp on such matters than Archie Clavering. He was so intent on this subject that he sent the marker out of the room so that he might discuss it with more freedom, and might plainly express his views as to her influence on his friend's fate.

And he kept talking about the Spy, as if something about his memories of her pulled him to the topic. He always claimed that he had won during their meeting, and he didn't stop making those claims now; yet, he still spoke of her and her abilities with a kind of respect that would have completely revealed the truth to anyone a bit more perceptive than Archie Clavering. He was so focused on this topic that he sent the marker out of the room so he could discuss it more freely and clearly share his opinions about her impact on his friend's future.

"By George! she's a wonderful woman. Do you know I can't help thinking of her at night. She keeps me awake;—she does, upon my honour."

"Wow! She's an amazing woman. You know, I can't stop thinking about her at night. She keeps me up; she really does, I swear."

"I can't say she keeps me awake, but I wish I had my seventy pounds back again."

"I can’t say she keeps me up at night, but I wish I could get my seventy pounds back."

"Do you know, if I were you, I shouldn't grudge it. I should think it worth pretty nearly all the money to have had the dealing with her."

"Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I wouldn't hold a grudge. I'd say dealing with her is nearly worth all the money."

"Then you ought to go halves."

"Then you should split it evenly."

"Well, yes;—only that I ain't flush, I would. When one thinks of it, her absolutely taking the notes out of your waistcoat-pocket, upon my word it's beautiful! She'd have had it out of mine, if I hadn't been doosed sharp."

"Well, yeah;—only that I'm not exactly loaded, I would. When you think about it, her actually taking the cash out of your pocket, I swear it's impressive! She would have gotten it out of mine if I hadn't been really quick."

"She understood what she was about, certainly."

"She definitely knew what she was doing."

"What I should like to know is this: did she or did she not tell Lady Ongar what she was to do;—about you I mean? I daresay she did after all."

"What I want to know is this: did she or did she not tell Lady Ongar what she was going to do;—about you, I mean? I guess she probably did, after all."

"And took my money for nothing?"

"And took my money for nothing?"

"Because you didn't go high enough, you know."

"Because you didn't aim high enough, you know."

"But that was your fault. I went as high as you told me."

"But that was your fault. I went as high as you said I should."

"No, you didn't, Clavvy; not if you remember. But the fact is, I don't suppose you could go high enough. I shouldn't be surprised if such a woman as that wanted—thousands! I shouldn't indeed. I shall never forget the way in which she swore at me;—and how she abused me about my family. I think she must have had some special reason for disliking Warwickshire, she said such awful hard things about it."

"No, you didn't, Clavvy; not if you remember. But the truth is, I don’t think you could ever go high enough. I wouldn’t be surprised if a woman like that wanted—thousands! I really wouldn’t. I’ll never forget how she swore at me—and how she insulted me about my family. I think she must have had some specific reason for hating Warwickshire; she said some really harsh things about it."

"How did she know that you came from Warwickshire?"

"How did she know you were from Warwickshire?"

"She did know it. If I tell you something don't you say anything about it. I have an idea about her."

"She knew it. If I tell you something, don’t say anything about it. I have a thought about her."

"What is it?"

"What's that?"

"I didn't mention it before, because I don't talk much of those sort of things. I don't pretend to understand them, and it is better to leave them alone."

"I didn't bring it up earlier because I don't usually discuss things like that. I don't pretend to understand them, and it's better to just leave them be."

"But what do you mean?"

"But what do you mean?"

Doodles looked very solemn as he answered. "I think she's a medium—or a media, or whatever it ought to be called."

Doodles looked very serious as he replied. "I think she's a medium—or a media, or whatever it should be called."

"What! one of those spirit-rapping people?" And Archie's hair almost stood on end as he asked the question.

"What! One of those people who talk to spirits?" And Archie's hair nearly stood on end as he asked the question.

"They don't rap now,—not the best of them, that is. That was the old way, and seems to have been given up."

"They don't rap now—not the best of them, anyway. That was the old way and seems to have been abandoned."

"But what do you suppose she did?"

"But what do you think she did?"

"How did she know that the money was in your waistcoat-pocket, now? How did she know that I came from Warwickshire? And then she had a way of going about the room as though she could have raised herself off her feet in a moment if she had chosen. And then her swearing, and the rest of it,—so unlike any other woman, you know."

"How did she know the money was in your waistcoat pocket? How did she know I was from Warwickshire? Plus, she moved around the room like she could lift herself off the ground at any moment if she wanted to. And then there's her swearing and everything else—so different from any other woman, you know."

"But do you think she could have made Julia hate me?"

"But do you think she could have made Julia dislike me?"

"Ah, I can't tell that. There are such lots of things going on now-a-days that a fellow can understand nothing about! But I've no doubt of this,—if you were to tie her up with ropes ever so, I don't in the least doubt but what she'd get out."

"Ah, I can’t say. There are so many things happening these days that someone can’t make sense of it all! But I’m sure of this—if you were to tie her up with ropes, I have no doubt she’d find a way to escape."

Archie was awe-struck, and made two or three strokes after this; but then he plucked up his courage and asked a question,—

Archie was amazed and took a couple of strokes after that; but then he gathered his courage and asked a question,—

"Where do you suppose they get it from, Doodles?"

"Where do you think they get it from, Doodles?"

"That's just the question."

"That's the question."

"Is it from—the devil, do you think?" said Archie, whispering the name of the Evil One in a very low voice.

"Do you think it's from the devil?" Archie asked, whispering the name of the Evil One very quietly.

"Well, yes; I suppose that's most likely."

"Yeah, I guess that's probably true."

"Because they don't seem to do a great deal of harm with it after all. As for my money, she would have had that any way, for I intended to give it to her."

"Because they don’t really seem to harm anyone with it after all. As for my money, she would have received that anyway, since I planned to give it to her."

"There are people who think," said Doodles, "that the spirits don't come from anywhere, but are always floating about."

"There are people who believe," said Doodles, "that spirits don't come from anywhere, but are just always floating around."

"And then one person catches them, and another doesn't?" asked Archie.

"And then one person catches them, and another doesn't?" asked Archie.

"They tell me that it depends upon what the mediums or medias eat and drink," said Doodles, "and upon what sort of minds they have. They must be cleverish people, I fancy, or the spirits wouldn't come to them."

"They say it depends on what the mediums eat and drink," Doodles said, "and what kind of minds they have. They probably need to be somewhat clever, or the spirits wouldn’t come to them."

"But you never hear of any swell being a medium. Why don't the spirits go to a prime minister or some of those fellows? Only think what a help they'd be."

"But you never hear of any wealthy person being a medium. Why don't the spirits go to a prime minister or some of those guys? Just think about how helpful they could be."

"If they come from the devil," suggested Doodles, "he wouldn't let them do any real good."

"If they come from the devil," Doodles suggested, "he wouldn't let them do any real good."

"I've heard a deal about them," said Archie, "and it seems to me that the mediums are always poor people, and that they come from nobody knows where. The Spy is a clever woman I daresay—"

"I've heard a lot about them," said Archie, "and it seems to me that the mediums are always poor people, and they come from who knows where. The Spy is a smart woman, I must say—"

"There isn't much doubt about that," said the admiring Doodles.

"There’s definitely no doubt about that," said the admiring Doodles.

"But you can't say she's respectable, you know. If I was a spirit I wouldn't go to a woman who wore such dirty stockings as she had on."

"But you can't say she's respectable, you know. If I were a spirit, I wouldn't go to a woman wearing such dirty stockings like she had on."

"That's nonsense, Clavvy. What does a spirit care about a woman's stockings?"

"That's ridiculous, Clavvy. What does a ghost care about a woman's stockings?"

"But why don't they ever go to the wise people? that's what I want to know." And as he asked the question boldly he struck his ball sharply, and, lo, the three balls rolled vanquished into three different pockets. "I don't believe about it," said Archie, as he readjusted the score. "The devil can't do such things as that or there'd be an end of everything; and as to spirits in the air, why should there be more spirits now than there were four-and-twenty years ago?"

"But why don't they ever go to the wise people? That's what I want to know." And as he asked the question boldly, he hit his ball sharply, and, look, the three balls rolled defeated into three different pockets. "I don't buy that," said Archie, as he adjusted the score. "The devil can't do things like that, or everything would be over; and as for spirits in the air, why should there be more spirits now than there were twenty-four years ago?"

"That's all very well, old fellow," said Doodles, "but you and I ain't clever enough to understand everything." Then that subject was dropped, and Doodles went back for a while to the perils of Jack Stuart's yacht.

"That’s all well and good, buddy," said Doodles, "but you and I aren’t smart enough to understand everything." Then that topic was dropped, and Doodles returned for a while to the dangers of Jack Stuart's yacht.

After the lunch, which was in fact Archie's early dinner, Doodles was going to leave his friend, but Archie insisted that his brother captain should walk with him up to Berkeley Square, and see the last of him into his cab. Doodles had suggested that Sir Hugh would be there, and that Sir Hugh was not always disposed to welcome his brother's friends to his own house after the most comfortable modes of friendship; but Archie explained that on such an occasion as this there need be no fear on that head; he and his brother were going away together, and there was a certain feeling of jollity about the trip which would divest Sir Hugh of his roughness. "And besides," said Archie, "as you will be there to see me off, he'll know that you're not going to stay yourself." Convinced by this, Doodles consented to walk up to Berkeley Square.

After lunch, which was actually Archie's early dinner, Doodles was about to leave his friend, but Archie insisted that his brother captain should walk with him to Berkeley Square and see him off into his cab. Doodles had mentioned that Sir Hugh would be there and that Sir Hugh wasn't always welcoming to his brother's friends in his own home after the most comfortable forms of friendship. But Archie assured him that on an occasion like this, there was no need to worry about that; he and his brother were leaving together, and there was a certain feeling of cheer about the trip that would soften Sir Hugh's roughness. "And besides," Archie said, "since you’ll be there to see me off, he'll know that you’re not going to stay." Convinced by this, Doodles agreed to walk up to Berkeley Square.

Sir Hugh had spent the greatest part of this day at home, immersed among his guns and rods, and their various appurtenances. He also had breakfasted at his club, but had ordered his luncheon to be prepared for him at home. He had arranged to leave Berkeley Square at four, and had directed that his lamb chops should be brought to him exactly at three. He was himself a little late in coming downstairs, and it was ten minutes past the hour when he desired that the chops might be put on the table, saying that he himself would be in the drawing-room in time to meet them. He was a man solicitous about his lamb chops, and careful that the asparagus should be hot; solicitous also as to that bottle of Lafitte by which those comestibles were to be accompanied and which was, of its own nature, too good to be shared with his brother Archie. But as he was on the landing, by the drawing-room door, descending quickly, conscious that in obedience to his orders the chops had been already served, he was met by a servant who, with disturbed face and quick voice, told him that there was a lady waiting for him in the hall.

Sir Hugh had spent most of the day at home, surrounded by his guns, rods, and their various accessories. He had also had breakfast at his club but had requested his lunch to be prepared at home. He planned to leave Berkeley Square at four and instructed that his lamb chops be served exactly at three. He was a bit late coming downstairs, and it was ten minutes past the hour when he asked for the chops to be put on the table, mentioning that he would be in the drawing-room in time to greet them. He was quite particular about his lamb chops, ensuring that the asparagus was hot; he also cared about that bottle of Lafitte that was to accompany the meal, which he thought was too good to share with his brother Archie. However, as he was on the landing by the drawing-room door, rushing down, aware that the chops had already been served as per his instructions, a servant met him with a worried expression and said quickly that there was a lady waiting for him in the hall.

"D—— it!" said Sir Hugh.

"Damn it!" said Sir Hugh.

"She has just come, Sir Hugh, and says that she specially wants to see you."

"She just arrived, Sir Hugh, and says she really wants to see you."

"Why the devil did you let her in?"

"Why on earth did you let her in?"

"She walked in when the door was opened, Sir Hugh, and I couldn't help it. She seemed to be a lady, Sir Hugh, and I didn't like not to let her inside the door."

"She walked in when the door was opened, Sir Hugh, and I couldn't help it. She seemed like a lady, Sir Hugh, and I didn't want to deny her entry."

"What's the lady's name?" asked the master.

"What's the lady's name?" asked the master.

"It's a foreign name, Sir Hugh. She said she wouldn't keep you five minutes." The lamb chops, and the asparagus, and the Lafitte were in the dining-room, and the only way to the dining-room lay through the hall to which the foreign lady had obtained an entrance. Sir Hugh, making such calculations as the moments allowed, determined that he would face the enemy, and pass on to his banquet over her prostrate body. He went quickly down into the hall, and there was encountered by Sophie Gordeloup, who, skipping over the gun-cases, and rushing through the portmanteaus, caught the baronet by the arm before he had been able to approach the dining-room door. "Sir 'Oo," she said, "I am so glad to have caught you. You are going away, and I have things to tell you which you must hear—yes; it is well for you I have caught you, Sir 'Oo." Sir Hugh looked as though he by no means participated in this feeling, and saying something about his great hurry begged that he might be allowed to go to his food. Then he added that, as far as his memory served him, he had not the honour of knowing the lady who was addressing him.

"It's a foreign name, Sir Hugh. She said she wouldn't keep you for more than five minutes." The lamb chops, asparagus, and Lafitte were in the dining room, and the only way to get there was through the hall where the foreign lady had been let in. Sir Hugh, quickly weighing his options, decided he would confront her and make his way to the feast over her fallen form. He hurried down the hall, only to be met by Sophie Gordeloup, who, leaping over the gun cases and rushing past the suitcases, grabbed the baronet by the arm before he could reach the dining room door. "Sir 'Oo," she said, "I'm so glad I caught you. You're leaving, and I have things to tell you that you need to hear—yes; it's lucky I caught you, Sir 'Oo." Sir Hugh looked like he did not share her enthusiasm and, mumbling something about being in a hurry, requested to be allowed to go to his meal. Then he added that, as far as he could recall, he did not have the pleasure of knowing the lady speaking to him.

"You come in to your little dinner," said Sophie, "and I will tell you everything as you are eating. Don't mind me. You shall eat and drink, and I will talk. I am Madame Gordeloup,—Sophie Gordeloup. Ah,—you know the name now. Yes. That is me. Count Pateroff is my brother. You know Count Pateroff? He knowed Lord Ongar, and I knowed Lord Ongar. We know Lady Ongar. Ah,—you understand now that I can have much to tell. It is well you was not gone without seeing me? Eh; yes! You shall eat and drink, but suppose you send that man into the kitchen!"

"You come in for your little dinner," Sophie said, "and I’ll tell you everything while you eat. Don’t mind me. You can eat and drink, and I’ll talk. I’m Madame Gordeloup—Sophie Gordeloup. Ah, you recognize the name now. Yes, that’s me. Count Pateroff is my brother. Do you know Count Pateroff? He knew Lord Ongar, and I knew Lord Ongar. We know Lady Ongar. Ah, you see now that I have a lot to share. It’s good you didn’t leave without seeing me, right? Yes! You can eat and drink, but maybe you should send that man into the kitchen!"

Sir Hugh was so taken by surprise that he hardly knew how to act on the spur of the moment. He certainly had heard of Madame Gordeloup, though he had never before seen her. For years past her name had been familiar to him in London, and when Lady Ongar had returned as a widow it had been, to his thinking, one of her worst offences that this woman had been her friend. Under ordinary circumstances his judgment would have directed him to desire the servant to put her out into the street as an impostor, and to send for the police if there was any difficulty. But it certainly might be possible that this woman had something to tell with reference to Lady Ongar which it would suit his purposes to hear. At the present moment he was not very well inclined to his sister-in-law, and was disposed to hear evil of her. So he passed on into the dining-room and desired Madame Gordeloup to follow him. Then he closed the room door, and standing up with his back to the fireplace, so that he might be saved from the necessity of asking her to sit down, he declared himself ready to hear anything that his visitor might have to say.

Sir Hugh was so caught off guard that he hardly knew how to react in the moment. He definitely recognized the name Madame Gordeloup, even though he had never met her before. For years, her name had been familiar to him in London, and when Lady Ongar returned as a widow, he considered it one of her worst offenses that this woman was her friend. Normally, he would have wanted to have the servant throw her out as a fraud and call the police if there was any trouble. But it was possible that this woman had information about Lady Ongar that he might want to hear. Right now, he wasn't feeling very positively toward his sister-in-law and was inclined to believe the worst about her. So he walked into the dining room and asked Madame Gordeloup to follow him. Then he shut the door, and standing with his back to the fireplace to avoid having to invite her to sit, he said he was ready to hear anything she had to say.

"But you will eat your dinner, Sir 'Oo? You will not mind me. I shall not care."

"But you'll eat your dinner, Sir 'Oo? You won't mind me. I won't care."

"Thank you, no;—if you will just say what you have got to say, I will be obliged to you."

"Thank you, but no; if you could just say what you need to say, I'd appreciate it."

"But the nice things will be so cold! Why should you mind me? Nobody minds me."

"But the nice things will be so cold! Why should you care about me? Nobody cares about me."

"I will wait, if you please, till you have done me the honour of leaving me."

"I'll wait, if that's alright with you, until you have the courtesy to leave me."

"Ah, well,—you Englishmen are so cold and ceremonious. But Lord Ongar was not with me like that. I knew Lord Ongar so well."

"Ah, well—you English guys are so cold and formal. But Lord Ongar wasn't like that with me. I knew Lord Ongar really well."

"Lord Ongar was more fortunate than I am."

"Lord Ongar is luckier than I am."

"He was a poor man who did kill himself. Yes. It was always that bottle of Cognac. And there was other bottles was worser still. Never mind; he has gone now, and his widow has got the money. It is she has been a fortunate woman! Sir 'Oo, I will sit down here in the arm-chair." Sir Hugh made a motion with his hand, not daring to forbid her to do as she was minded. "And you, Sir 'Oo;—will not you sit down also?"

"He was a poor man who took his own life. Yes. It was always that bottle of Cognac. And there were other bottles that were even worse. Never mind; he’s gone now, and his widow has the money. She’s been a lucky woman! Sir Hugh, I’ll sit here in the armchair." Sir Hugh gestured with his hand, not daring to stop her from doing what she wanted. "And you, Sir Hugh; won’t you sit down too?"

"I will continue to stand if you will allow me."

"I'll keep standing if you let me."

"Very well; you shall do as most pleases you. As I did walk here, and shall walk back, I will sit down."

"Alright; you can do whatever you prefer. As I walked here and will walk back, I will take a seat."

"And now if you have anything to say, Madame Gordeloup," said Sir Hugh, looking at the silver covers which were hiding the chops and the asparagus, and looking also at his watch, "perhaps you will be good enough to say it."

"And now if you have anything to say, Madame Gordeloup," said Sir Hugh, glancing at the silver covers hiding the chops and the asparagus, and checking his watch, "maybe you could say it now."

"Anything to say! Yes, Sir 'Oo, I have something to say. It is a pity you will not sit at your dinner."

"Got something to say! Yeah, Sir 'Oo, I have something to say. It's a shame you won't join us for dinner."

"I will not sit at my dinner till you have left me. So now, if you will be pleased to proceed—"

"I won’t sit down for dinner until you’ve left. So now, if you’re ready to continue—

"I will proceed. Perhaps you don't know that Lord Ongar died in these arms?" And Sophie, as she spoke, stretched out her skinny hands, and put herself as far as possible into the attitude in which it would be most convenient to nurse the head of a dying man upon her bosom. Sir Hugh, thinking to himself that Lord Ongar could hardly have received much consolation in his fate from this incident, declared that he had not heard the fact before. "No; you have not heard it. She have tell nothing to her friends here. He die abroad, and she has come back with all the money; but she tell nothing to anybody here, so I must tell."

"I'll continue. Maybe you don't know that Lord Ongar died in my arms?" Sophie said, stretching out her thin hands and positioning herself as if she were cradling the head of a dying man on her chest. Sir Hugh thought to himself that Lord Ongar probably didn't find much comfort in that moment, and he admitted he hadn't heard about it before. "No, you haven't heard. She hasn’t told her friends here anything. He died overseas, and she returned with all the money, but she hasn’t said anything to anyone here, so I have to tell you."

"But I don't care how he died, Madame Gordeloup. It is nothing to me."

"But I don't care how he died, Madame Gordeloup. It means nothing to me."

"But yes, Sir 'Oo. The lady, your wife, is the sister to Lady Ongar. Is not that so? Lady Ongar did live with you before she was married. Is not that so? Your brother and your cousin both wishes to marry her and have all the money. Is not that so? Your brother has come to me to help him, and has sent the little man out of Warwickshire. Is not that so?"

"But yes, Sir 'Oo. The lady, your wife, is the sister of Lady Ongar. Isn’t that right? Lady Ongar did live with you before she got married. Isn’t that true? Your brother and your cousin both want to marry her and get all her money. Isn’t that so? Your brother has come to me for help and has sent the little guy out of Warwickshire. Isn’t that correct?"

"What the d—— is all that to me?" said Sir Hugh, who did not quite understand the story as the lady was telling it.

"What the hell is all that to me?" said Sir Hugh, who didn’t quite understand the story as the lady was telling it.

"I will explain, Sir 'Oo, what the d—— it is to you; only I wish you were eating the nice things on the table. This Lady Ongar is treating me very bad. She treat my brother very bad too. My brother is Count Pateroff. We have been put to—oh, such expenses for her! It have nearly ruined me. I make a journey to your London here altogether for her. Then, for her, I go down to that accursed little island;—what you call it?—where she insult me. Oh! all my time is gone. Your brother and your cousin, and the little man out of Warwickshire, all coming to my house,—just as it please them."

"I'll explain, Sir 'Oo, what the hell is going on; I just wish you were enjoying the nice food on the table. This Lady Ongar is treating me very badly. She's treating my brother badly too. My brother is Count Pateroff. We've been put to—oh, such expenses for her! It has nearly ruined me. I made a trip to your London just for her. Then, for her, I went down to that cursed little island;—what do you call it?—where she insulted me. Oh! all my time is wasted. Your brother and your cousin, and the little guy from Warwickshire, all coming to my house—just as it pleases them."

"But what is this to me?" shouted Sir Hugh.

"But what does this mean to me?" shouted Sir Hugh.

"A great deal to you," screamed back Madame Gordeloup. "You see I know everything,—everything. I have got papers."

"A lot to you," shouted Madame Gordeloup in return. "You see, I know everything—everything. I have documents."

"What do I care for your papers? Look here, Madame Gordeloup, you had better go away."

"What do I care about your papers? Look here, Madame Gordeloup, you'd better leave."

"Not yet, Sir 'Oo; not yet. You are going away to Norway—I know; and I am ruined before you come back."

"Not yet, Sir 'Oo; not yet. You’re heading off to Norway—I know; and I'm ruined before you get back."

"Look here, madame; do you mean that you want money from me?"

"Hey there, ma'am; are you saying you want money from me?"

"I want my rights, Sir 'Oo. Remember, I know everything;—everything; oh, such things! If they were all known,—in the newspapers, you understand, or that kind of thing, that lady in Bolton Street would lose all her money to-morrow. Yes. There is uncles to the little lord; yes! Ah, how much would they give me, I wonder? They would not tell me to go away."

"I want my rights, Sir 'Oo. Remember, I know everything—everything; oh, such things! If they were all known—in the newspapers, you know, or something like that, that lady on Bolton Street would lose all her money tomorrow. Yes. There are uncles to the little lord; yes! Ah, I wonder how much they would give me? They wouldn’t tell me to leave."

Sophie was perhaps justified in the estimate she had made of Sir Hugh's probable character from the knowledge which she had acquired of his brother Archie; but, nevertheless, she had fallen into a great mistake. There could hardly have been a man then in London less likely to fall into her present views than Sir Hugh Clavering. Not only was he too fond of his money to give it away without knowing why he did so; but he was subject to none of that weakness by which some men are prompted to submit to such extortions. Had he believed her story, and had Lady Ongar been really dear to him, he would never have dealt with such a one as Madame Gordeloup otherwise than through the police.

Sophie might have been right in her assessment of Sir Hugh's character based on what she knew about his brother Archie; however, she had made a significant mistake. At that moment, there was probably no one in London less likely to agree with her than Sir Hugh Clavering. He was too attached to his money to give it away without a good reason, and he didn't have any of that weakness that leads some men to give in to such manipulations. If he had believed her story and truly cared for Lady Ongar, he would never have handled the situation with someone like Madame Gordeloup except through the police.

"Madame Gordeloup," said he, "if you don't immediately take yourself off, I shall have you put out of the house."

"Madame Gordeloup," he said, "if you don't leave right now, I will have you removed from the house."

He would have sent for a constable at once, had he not feared that by doing so, he would retard his journey.

He would have called for a police officer immediately if he hadn't been worried that it would slow him down.

"What!" said Sophie, whose courage was as good as his own. "Me put out of the house! Who shall touch me?"

"What!" Sophie exclaimed, her courage just as strong as his. "Me kicked out of the house! Who would even dare to touch me?"

"My servant shall; or if that will not do, the police. Come, walk." And he stepped over towards her as though he himself intended to assist in her expulsion by violence.

"My servant will; or if that doesn't work, I'll call the police. Come on, let’s go." And he moved closer to her as if he meant to help force her out.

"Well, you are there; I see you; and what next?" said Sophie. "You, and your valk! I can tell you things fit for you to know, and you say, Valk. If I valk, I will valk to some purpose. I do not often valk for nothing when I am told—Valk!" Upon this, Sir Hugh rang the bell with some violence. "I care nothing for your bells, or for your servants, or for your policemen. I have told you that your sister owe me a great deal of money, and you say,—Valk. I vill valk." Thereupon the servant came into the room, and Sir Hugh, in an angry voice, desired him to open the front door. "Yes,—open vide," said Sophie, who, when anger came upon her, was apt to drop into a mode of speaking English which she was able to avoid in her cooler moments. "Sir 'Oo, I am going to valk, and you shall hear of my valking."

"Well, you're here; I see you; now what?" said Sophie. "You and your walk! I have things to tell you that you're supposed to know, and you say, walk. If I walk, I’ll do it for a reason. I don’t usually walk for nothing when I’m told—Walk!" With that, Sir Hugh rang the bell quite forcefully. "I don’t care about your bells, your servants, or your policemen. I've told you that your sister owes me a lot of money, and you say—Walk. I will walk." Then the servant came into the room, and Sir Hugh, in an angry tone, instructed him to open the front door. "Yes—open wide," said Sophie, who, when she got angry, tended to slip into a way of speaking English that she could avoid when she was calmer. "Sir Hugh, I’m going to walk, and you’ll hear all about my walking."

"Am I to take that as a threat?" said he.

"Should I take that as a threat?" he asked.

"Not a tret at all," said she; "only a promise. Ah, I am good to keep my promises! Yes, I make a promise. Your poor wife,—down with the daises; I know all, and she shall hear too. That is another promise. And your brother, the captain. Oh! here he is, and the little man out of Warwickshire." She had got up from her chair, and had moved towards the door with the intention of going; but just as she was passing out into the hall, she encountered Archie and Doodles. Sir Hugh, who had been altogether at a loss to understand what she had meant by the man out of Warwickshire, followed her into the hall, and became more angry than before at finding that his brother had brought a friend to his house at so very inopportune a moment. The wrath in his face was so plainly expressed that Doodles could perceive it, and wished himself away. The presence also of the Spy was not pleasant to the gallant captain. Was the wonderful woman ubiquitous, that he should thus encounter her again, and that so soon after all the things that he had spoken of her on this morning? "How do you do, gentlemen?" said Sophie. "There is a great many boxes here, and I with my crinoline have not got room." Then she shook hands, first with Archie, and then with Doodles; and asked the latter why he was not as yet gone to Warwickshire. Archie, in almost mortal fear, looked up into his brother's face. Had his brother learned the story of that seventy pounds? Sir Hugh was puzzled beyond measure at finding that the woman knew the two men; but having still an eye to his lamb chops, was chiefly anxious to get rid of Sophie and Doodles together.

"Not a threat at all," she said; "just a promise. Ah, I’m good at keeping my promises! Yes, I’m making a promise. Your poor wife—is down with the daisies; I know everything, and she’ll find out too. That’s another promise. And your brother, the captain. Oh! here he is, and the little guy from Warwickshire." She had gotten up from her chair and moved toward the door, intending to leave; but just as she was stepping into the hall, she ran into Archie and Doodles. Sir Hugh, who was completely confused about what she meant by the guy from Warwickshire, followed her into the hall and became even angrier to find that his brother had brought a friend to his house at such an inconvenient moment. The anger on his face was evident enough that Doodles noticed it and wished he could disappear. The presence of the Spy was also uncomfortable for the brave captain. Was this amazing woman everywhere, that he should see her again so soon after everything he had said about her that morning? "How do you do, gentlemen?" Sophie said. "There are so many boxes here, and I can't find room with my crinoline." Then she shook hands, first with Archie, and then with Doodles; and asked the latter why he hadn’t gone to Warwickshire yet. Archie, nearly terrified, glanced up at his brother’s face. Had his brother found out about that seventy pounds? Sir Hugh was utterly baffled that the woman knew both men; but with his mind still on his lamb chops, he mainly wanted to get rid of Sophie and Doodles together.

"This is my friend Boodle,—Captain Boodle," said Archie, trying to put a bold face upon the crisis. "He has come to see me off."

"This is my friend Boodle—Captain Boodle," Archie said, trying to stay upbeat during this tough moment. "He’s come to see me off."

"Very kind of him," said Sir Hugh. "Just make way for this lady, will you? I want to get her out of the house if I can. Your friend seems to know her; perhaps he'll be good enough to give her his arm."

"Very kind of him," said Sir Hugh. "Could you please make way for this lady? I want to help her get out of the house if possible. Your friend seems to know her; maybe he'll be nice enough to offer her his arm."

"Who;—I?" said Doodles. "No; I don't know her particularly. I did meet her once before, just once,—in a casual way."

"Who, me?" said Doodles. "No, I don’t really know her. I only met her once, just briefly, in a casual way."

"Captain Booddle and me is very good friends," said Sophie. "He come to my house and behave himself very well; only he is not so handy a man as your brother, Sir 'Oo."

"Captain Booddle and I are very good friends," said Sophie. "He comes to my house and behaves himself really well; he’s just not as handy a man as your brother, Sir 'Oo."

Archie trembled, and he trembled still more when his brother, turning to him, asked him if he knew the woman.

Archie shook, and he shook even more when his brother turned to him and asked if he knew the woman.

"Yes; he know the woman very well," said Sophie. "Why do you not come any more to see me? You send your little friend; but I like you better yourself. You come again when you return, and all that shall be made right."

"Yeah, he knows the woman really well," Sophie said. "Why don’t you come to see me anymore? You send your little friend, but I prefer you to come yourself. Come back when you return, and we’ll fix everything."

But still she did not go. She had now seated herself on a gun-case which was resting on a portmanteau, and seemed to be at her ease. The time was going fast, and Sir Hugh, if he meant to eat his chops, must eat them at once.

But she still didn't leave. She had now sat down on a gun case resting on a suitcase and seemed comfortable. Time was slipping away, and Sir Hugh needed to eat his chops right away if he planned to have them.

"See her out of the hall, into the street," he said to Archie; "and if she gives trouble, send for the police. She has come here to get money from me by threats, and only that we have no time, I would have her taken to the lock-up house at once." Then Sir Hugh retreated into the dining-room and shut the door.

"Take her out of the hall and into the street," he told Archie. "If she causes any problems, call the police. She came here trying to get money from me by threatening me, and if we weren't in such a hurry, I would have her sent to jail right away." Then Sir Hugh went back into the dining room and closed the door.

"Lock-up-ouse!" said Sophie, scornfully. "What is dat?"

"Lock-up house!" Sophie said with a sneer. "What is that?"

"He means a prison," said Doodles.

"He means a prison," said Doodles.

"Prison! I know who is most likely be in a prison. Tell me of a prison! Is he a minister of state that he can send out order for me to be made prisoner? Is there lettres de cachet now in England? I think not. Prison, indeed!"

"Prison! I know who is most likely to be in prison. Tell me about a prison! Is he a government official that he can issue orders for me to be imprisoned? Are there still lettres de cachet in England? I don't think so. Prison, really!"

"But really, Madame Gordeloup, you had better go; you had, indeed," said Archie.

"But honestly, Madame Gordeloup, you should really go; you really should," said Archie.

"You, too—you bid me go? Did I bid you go when you came to me? Did I not tell you, sit down? Was I not polite? Did I send for a police? or talk of lock-up-ouse to you? No. It is English that do these things; only English."

"You, too—you want me to go? Did I tell you to leave when you came to me? Didn't I say, sit down? Wasn't I polite? Did I call the police? Or mention locking you up? No. It's the English who do these things; only the English."

Archie felt that it was incumbent on him to explain that his visit to her house had been made under other circumstances,—that he had brought money instead of seeking it; and had, in fact, gone to her simply in the way of her own trade. He did begin some preliminaries to this explanation; but as the servant was there, and as his brother might come out from the dining-room,—and as also he was aware that he could hardly tell the story much to his own advantage, he stopped abruptly, and, looking piteously at Doodles, implored him to take the lady away.

Archie felt it was necessary to clarify that his visit to her house had different circumstances—that he had come with money rather than in search of it; and that he had, in fact, approached her simply as part of her own business. He started to set up this explanation, but since the servant was present, and his brother might come out of the dining room—and knowing that he could hardly present the story in a favorable light—he abruptly stopped, and, looking sadly at Doodles, begged him to take the lady away.

"Perhaps you wouldn't mind just seeing her into Mount Street," said Archie.

"Maybe you wouldn’t mind just walking her to Mount Street," Archie said.

"Who; I?" said Doodles, electrified.

"Who, me?" said Doodles, electrified.

"It is only just round the corner," said Archie.

"It’s just around the corner," said Archie.

"Yes, Captain Booddle, we will go," said Sophie. "This is a bad house; and your Sir 'Oo,—I do not like him at all. Lock-up, indeed! I tell you he shall very soon be locked up himself. There is what you call Davy's locker. I know;—yes."

"Sure, Captain Booddle, we're going," said Sophie. "This place is terrible; and your Sir 'Oo—I really don't like him. Locking people up, really! I can tell you he will soon find himself locked up too. That's what you call Davy's locker. I know it; yes."

Doodles also trembled when he heard this anathema, and thought once more of the character of Jack Stuart and his yacht.

Doodles also flinched when he heard this curse and thought again about Jack Stuart and his yacht.

"Pray go with her," said Archie.

"Please go with her," Archie said.

"But I had come to see you off."

"But I came to see you off."

"Never mind," said Archie. "He is in such a taking, you know. God bless you, old fellow; good-by! I'll write and tell you what fish we get, and mind you tell me what Turriper does for the Bedfordshire. Good-by, Madame Gordeloup—good-by."

"Don't worry about it," Archie said. "He's really worked up, you know. Take care, my friend; see you later! I'll write and let you know what fish we catch, and make sure to update me on what Turriper does for the Bedfordshire. See you, Madame Gordeloup—take care."

There was no escape for him, so Doodles put on his hat and prepared to walk away to Mount Street with the Spy under his arm,—the Spy as to whose avocations, over and beyond those of her diplomatic profession, he had such strong suspicions! He felt inclined to be angry with his friend, but the circumstances of his parting hardly admitted of any expression of anger.

There was no way out for him, so Doodles put on his hat and got ready to walk to Mount Street with the Spy tucked under his arm—the Spy about whom he had such strong suspicions regarding her activities, aside from her diplomatic job! He wanted to be mad at his friend, but the situation didn’t really allow for any anger to be shown.

"Good-by, Clavvy," he said. "Yes; I'll write; that is, if I've got anything to say."

"Goodbye, Clavvy," he said. "Yeah; I'll write; that is, if I have anything to say."

"Take care of yourself, captain," said Sophie.

"Take care of yourself, captain," Sophie said.

"All right," said Archie.

"Okay," said Archie.

"Mind you come and see me when you come back," said Sophie.

"Make sure to come and see me when you get back," Sophie said.

"Of course I will," said Archie.

"Of course I will," Archie said.

"And we'll make that all right for you yet. Gentlemen, when they have so much to gain, shouldn't take a No too easy. You come with your handy glove, and we'll see about it again." Then Sophie walked off leaning upon the arm of Captain Boodle, and Archie stood at the door watching them till they turned out of sight round the corner of the square. At last he saw them no more, and then he returned to his brother.

"And we'll make that all work out for you. Gentlemen, when there’s so much at stake, shouldn’t accept a No too easily. You come with your handy glove, and we'll sort it out again." Then Sophie walked away leaning on Captain Boodle's arm, and Archie stood at the door watching them until they turned out of sight around the corner of the square. Finally, when he couldn't see them anymore, he went back to his brother.

And as we shall see Doodles no more,—or almost no more,—we will now bid him adieu civilly. The pair were not ill-matched, though the lady perhaps had some advantage in acuteness, given to her no doubt by the experience of a longer life. Doodles, as he walked along two sides of the square with the fair burden on his arm, felt himself to be in some sort proud of his position, though it was one from which he would not have been sorry to escape, had escape been possible. A remarkable phenomenon was the Spy, and to have walked round Berkeley Square with such a woman leaning on his arm, might in coming years be an event to remember with satisfaction. In the meantime he did not say much to her, and did not quite understand all that she said to him. At last he came to the door which he well remembered, and then he paused. He did not escape even then. After a while the door was opened, and those who were passing might have seen Captain Boodle, slowly and with hesitating steps, enter the narrow passage before the lady. Then Sophie followed, and closed the door behind her. As far as this story goes, what took place at that interview cannot be known. Let us bid farewell to Doodles, and wish him a happy escape.

And since we won’t be seeing Doodles anymore—well, hardly at all—we’ll say goodbye to him politely. The couple wasn't a bad match, though the lady might have had the upper hand in smarts, likely due to her having lived longer. As Doodles walked along two sides of the square with the lovely woman on his arm, he felt somewhat proud of his situation, even though he wouldn’t have minded slipping away if he could. The Spy was indeed quite a sight, and walking around Berkeley Square with such a woman by his side might be something he’d look back on fondly in years to come. For now, he didn’t say much to her and didn’t fully grasp everything she said. Finally, he reached the door he remembered well and paused. He still didn’t escape at that moment. After a bit, the door opened, and anyone passing by might have seen Captain Boodle step slowly and hesitantly into the narrow passage ahead of the lady. Then Sophie followed and closed the door behind her. As far as this story goes, what happened during that meeting remains a mystery. Let’s say goodbye to Doodles and wish him a happy exit.

"How did you come to know that woman?" said Hugh to his brother, as soon as Archie was in the dining-room.

"How did you meet that woman?" Hugh asked his brother as soon as Archie entered the dining room.

"She was a friend of Julia's," said Archie.

"She was one of Julia's friends," Archie said.

"You haven't given her money?" Hugh asked.

"You didn't give her any money?" Hugh asked.

"O dear, no," said Archie.

"Oh no," said Archie.

Immediately after that they got into their cab; the things were pitched on the top; and,—for a while,—we may bid adieu to them also.

Immediately after that, they got into their cab; the things were stacked on top; and—for a while—we can say goodbye to them too.

 

 

CHAPTER XL.

SHEWING HOW MRS. BURTON FOUGHT HER BATTLE.

Florence, I have been to Bolton Street and I have seen Lady Ongar." Those were the first words which Cecilia Burton spoke to her sister-in-law, when she found Florence in the drawing-room on her return from the visit which she had made to the countess. Florence had still before her the desk on which she had been writing; and the letter in its envelope addressed to Mrs. Clavering, but as yet unclosed, was lying beneath her blotting-paper. Florence, who had never dreamed of such an undertaking on Cecilia's part, was astounded at the tidings which she heard. Of course her first effort was made to learn from her sister's tone and countenance what had been the result of this interview;—but she could learn nothing from either. There was no radiance as of joy in Mrs. Burton's face, nor was there written there anything of despair. Her voice was serious and almost solemn, and her manner was very grave;—but that was all. "You have seen her?" said Florence, rising up from her chair.

FFlorence, "I went to Bolton Street and met Lady Ongar." Those were the first words Cecilia Burton said to her sister-in-law when she found Florence in the living room after her visit to the countess. Florence still had the desk in front of her, where she had been writing; the letter to Mrs. Clavering, still in its envelope but not yet sealed, lay under her blotting paper. Florence, who had never imagined Cecilia would do such a thing, was shocked by the news. Her first instinct was to read her sister's tone and expression to figure out what happened during this meeting—but she couldn’t discern anything from either. There was no look of joy on Mrs. Burton's face, nor any sign of despair. Her voice was serious and almost solemn, and her demeanor was very grave—but that was it. "You met her?" Florence said, getting up from her chair.

"Yes, dear. I may have done wrong. Theodore, I know, will say so. But I thought it best to try to learn the truth before you wrote to Mrs. Clavering."

"Yes, sweetheart. I might have made a mistake. Theodore will definitely say so. But I thought it was best to find out the truth before you reached out to Mrs. Clavering."

"And what is the truth? But perhaps you have not learned it?"

"And what is the truth? But maybe you haven't learned it?"

"I think I have learned all that she could tell me. She has been very frank."

"I believe I've learned everything she could share. She has been very open."

"Well;—what is the truth? Do not suppose, dearest, that I cannot bear it. I hope for nothing now. I only want to have this settled, that I may be at rest."

"Well;—what's the truth? Don't think, my dear, that I can't handle it. I don't hope for anything anymore. I just want this to be resolved so I can find peace."

Upon this Mrs. Burton took the suffering girl in her arms and caressed her tenderly. "My love," said she, "it is not easy for us to be at rest. You cannot be at rest as yet."

Upon this, Mrs. Burton took the suffering girl in her arms and hugged her gently. "My love," she said, "it's not easy for us to find peace. You can't find peace yet."

"I can. I will be so, when I know that this is settled. I do not wish to interfere with his fortune. There is my letter to his mother, and now I will go back to Stratton."

"I can. I will be that way when I know this is sorted out. I don’t want to mess with his future. There's my letter to his mom, and now I'm going back to Stratton."

"Not yet, dearest; not yet," said Mrs. Burton, taking the letter in her hand, but refraining from withdrawing it at once from the envelope. "You must hear what I have heard to-day."

"Not yet, my dear; not yet," Mrs. Burton said, holding the letter in her hand but stopping herself from pulling it out of the envelope right away. "You need to hear what I learned today."

"Does she say that she loves him?"

"Does she say that she loves him?"

"Ah, yes;—she loves him. We must not doubt that."

"Yeah, she loves him. We can't doubt that."

"And he;—what does she say of him?"

"And he—what does she say about him?"

"She says what you also must say, Florence;—though it is hard that it should be so. It must be as he shall decide."

"She says what you also have to say, Florence;—even though it’s tough that it’s this way. It has to be as he decides."

"No," said Florence, withdrawing herself from the arm that was still around her. "No; it shall not be as he may choose to decide. I will not so submit myself to him. It is enough as it is. I will never see him more;—never. To say that I do not love him would be untrue, but I will never see him again."

"No," Florence said, pulling away from the arm that was still around her. "No; it won't be left up to him to decide. I won't submit to him like that. It's enough as it is. I will never see him again;—never. To say that I don't love him would be a lie, but I will never see him again."

"Stop, dear; stop. What if it be no fault of his?"

"Wait, dear; just wait. What if it's not his fault?"

"No fault of his that he went to her when we—we—we—he and I—were, as we were, together!"

"No fault of his that he went to her when we—we—we—he and I—were, as we were, together!"

"Of course there has been some fault; but, Flo dearest, listen to me. You know that I would ask you to do nothing from which a woman should shrink."

"Of course there has been some fault; but, Flo dear, listen to me. You know that I would never ask you to do anything that a woman should hesitate to do."

"I know that you would give your heart's blood for me;—but nothing will be of avail now. Do not look at me with melancholy eyes like that. Cissy, it will not kill me. It is only the doubt that kills one."

"I know you would sacrifice everything for me;—but it won't help now. Don't look at me with those sad eyes. Cissy, this won't destroy me. It's just the uncertainty that really hurts."

"I will not look at you with melancholy eyes, but you must listen to me. She does not herself know what his intention is."

"I won't look at you with sad eyes, but you need to listen to me. She doesn't even know what his intentions are."

"But I know it,—and I know my own. Read my letter, Cissy. There is not one word of anger in it, nor will I ever utter a reproach. He knew her first. If he loved her through it all, it was a pity he could not be constant to his love, even though she was false to him."

"But I know it—and I know my own. Read my letter, Cissy. There isn't a single word of anger in it, and I will never say anything to blame him. He loved her first. If he loved her through everything, it's a shame he couldn't stay true to his love, even if she was unfaithful to him."

"But you won't hear me, Flo. As far as I can learn the truth,—as I myself most firmly believe,—when he went to her on her return to England, he had no other intention than that of visiting an old friend."

"But you won't hear me, Flo. As far as I can tell the truth,—which I firmly believe,—when he went to see her upon her return to England, he had no other intention than visiting an old friend."

"But what sort of friend, Cissy?"

"But what kind of friend, Cissy?"

"He had no idea then of being untrue to you. But when he saw her the old intimacy came back. That was natural. Then he was dazzled by her beauty."

"He had no idea at that time of being unfaithful to you. But when he saw her, the old closeness returned. That was normal. Then he was mesmerized by her beauty."

"Is she then so beautiful?"

"Is she really that beautiful?"

"She is very beautiful."

"She's really beautiful."

"Let him go to her," said Florence, tearing herself away from her sister's arm, and walking across the room with a quick and almost angry step. "Let her have him. Cissy, there shall be an end of it. I will not condescend to solicit his love. If she is such as you say, and if beauty with him goes for everything,—what chance could there be for such as me?"

"Let him go to her," Florence said, pulling away from her sister's arm and striding across the room with a quick, almost angry pace. "Let her have him. Cissy, this has to stop. I won't lower myself to beg for his love. If she's really what you say and if beauty is all that matters to him—what chance do I stand?"

"I did not say that beauty with him went for everything."

"I didn't say that beauty was everything to him."

"Of course it does. I ought to have known that it would be so with such a one as him. And then she is rich also,—wonderfully rich! What right can I have to think of him?"

"Of course it does. I should have known it would be like this with someone like him. And she's wealthy too—incredibly wealthy! What right do I have to think about him?"

"Florence, you are unjust. You do not even suspect that it is her money."

"Florence, you're being unfair. You don't even realize that it's her money."

"To me it is the same thing. I suppose that a woman who is so beautiful has a right to everything. I know that I am plain, and I will be—content—in future—to think no more—" Poor Florence, when she had got as far as that, broke down, and could go on no further with the declaration which she had been about to make as to her future prospects. Mrs. Burton, taking advantage of this, went on with her story, struggling, not altogether unsuccessfully, to assume a calm tone of unimpassioned reason.

"To me, it’s all the same. I guess a woman who is that beautiful has a right to everything. I know I'm plain, and I will be—content—in the future—to think no more—” Poor Florence, when she got to that point, broke down and couldn't continue with the declaration she had been about to make about her future. Mrs. Burton, seizing the moment, continued with her story, trying, not entirely unsuccessfully, to sound calm and reasonable.

"As I said before, he was dazzled—"

"As I mentioned earlier, he was amazed—"

"Dazzled!—oh!"

"Dazzled!—oh my!"

"But even then he had no idea of being untrue to you."

"But even then, he had no intention of being unfaithful to you."

"No; he was untrue without an idea. That is worse."

"No; he was unfaithful without any thought. That's even worse."

"Florence, you are perverse, and are determined to be unfair. I must beg that you will hear me to the end, so that then you may be able to judge what course you ought to follow." This Mrs. Burton said with the air of a great authority; after which she continued in a voice something less stern—"He thought of doing no injury to you when he went to see her; but something of the feeling of his old love grew upon him when he was in her company, and he became embarrassed by his position before he was aware of his own danger. He might, of course, have been stronger." Here Florence exhibited a gesture of strong impatience, though she did not speak. "I am not going to defend him altogether, but I think you must admit that he was hardly tried. Of course I cannot say what passed between them, but I can understand how easily they might recur to the old scenes;—how naturally she would wish for a renewal of the love which she had been base enough to betray! She does not, however, consider herself as at present engaged to him. That you may know for certain. It may be that she has asked him for such a promise, and that he has hesitated. If so, his staying away from us, and his not writing to you, can be easily understood."

"Florence, you're being unreasonable and determined to be unfair. I must ask you to listen to me fully, so you can judge what path you should take." Mrs. Burton said this with an air of great authority; then she continued in a slightly softer tone—"He didn't intend to hurt you when he went to see her, but he started feeling his old love for her again while he was with her, and he became awkward in his situation before he even realized the risk he was in. He could have been stronger, of course." At this, Florence showed a strong sign of impatience, though she didn’t say anything. "I’m not trying to defend him completely, but you have to admit that he wasn’t exactly put to the test. Of course, I can’t say what went on between them, but I can see how easily they might have fallen back into their old ways; how naturally she would want to rekindle the love she had shamefully betrayed! However, she doesn’t believe she’s currently engaged to him. You can be sure of that. It’s possible she asked him for a commitment and he hesitated. If that’s the case, his absence from us and the fact that he hasn't written to you makes perfect sense."

"And what is it you would have me do?"

"And what do you want me to do?"

"He is ill now. Wait till he is well. He would have been here before this, had not illness prevented him. Wait till he comes."

"He’s sick right now. Just wait until he gets better. He would have been here by now if he hadn’t been sick. Just wait until he arrives."

"I cannot do that, Cissy. Wait I must, but I cannot wait without offering him, through his mother, the freedom which I have so much reason to know that he desires."

"I can't do that, Cissy. I have to wait, but I can't just wait without offering him, through his mother, the freedom that I know he really wants."

"We do not know that he desires it. We do not know that his mother even suspects him of any fault towards you. Now that he is there,—at home,—away from Bolton Street—"

"We don't know if he wants it. We don't know if his mother even suspects him of doing anything wrong towards you. Now that he's there—at home—away from Bolton Street—

"I do not care to trust to such influences as that, Cissy. If he could not spend this morning with her in her own house, and then as he left her feel that he preferred me to her, and to all the world, I would rather be as I am than take his hand. He shall not marry me from pity, nor yet from a sense of duty. We know the old story,—how the devil would be a monk when he was sick. I will not accept his sick-bed allegiance, or have to think that I owe my husband to a mother's influence over him while he is ill."

"I don't want to rely on influences like that, Cissy. If he couldn't spend this morning with her at her place and then, as he left, feel that he preferred me to her and everyone else, I would rather stay as I am than take his hand. He won't marry me out of pity or a sense of obligation. We know the old story—how the devil wants to be a monk when he’s sick. I won't accept his sick-bed loyalty, or have to think that I owe my husband to a mother's influence over him while he’s unwell."

"You will make me think, Flo, that you are less true to him than she is."

"You'll make me think, Flo, that you care about him less than she does."

"Perhaps it is so. Let him have what good such truth as hers can do him. For me, I feel that it is my duty to be true to myself. I will not condescend to indulge my heart at the cost of my pride as a woman."

"Maybe that’s the case. Let him benefit from whatever good her truth can bring him. As for me, I believe it’s my responsibility to stay true to myself. I won’t stoop to satisfying my heart if it means sacrificing my pride as a woman."

"Oh, Florence, I hate that word pride."

"Oh, Florence, I really dislike that word pride."

"You would not hate it for yourself, in my place."

"You wouldn't hate it for yourself if you were in my position."

"You need take no shame to love him."

"You shouldn't feel ashamed to love him."

"Have I taken shame to love him?" said Florence, rising again from her chair. "Have I been missish or coy about my love? From the moment in which I knew that it was a pleasure to myself to regard him as my future husband, I have spoken of my love as being always proud of it. I have acknowledged it as openly as you can do yours for Theodore. I acknowledge it still, and will never deny it. Take shame that I have loved him! No. But I should take to myself great shame should I ever be brought so low as to ask him for his love, when once I had learned to think that he had transferred it from myself to another woman." Then she walked the length of the room, backwards and forwards, with hasty steps, not looking at her sister-in-law, whose eyes were now filled with tears. "Come, Cissy," she then said, "we will make an end of this. Read my letter if you choose to read it,—though indeed it is not worth the reading, and then let me send it to the post."

"Am I ashamed to love him?" Florence said, getting up from her chair again. "Have I acted like a brat or been shy about my feelings? From the moment I realized that it made me happy to think of him as my future husband, I've always proudly talked about my love for him. I've admitted it as openly as you do yours for Theodore. I still admit it and will never deny it. Am I ashamed that I've loved him? No. But I would be deeply ashamed if I ever fell so low as to ask him for his love after I believed he had shifted his feelings from me to another woman." Then she paced the room back and forth, not looking at her sister-in-law, whose eyes were now filled with tears. "Come on, Cissy," she said, "let's put an end to this. Read my letter if you want to—though honestly, it’s not worth reading—and then let me send it to the post."

Mrs. Burton now opened the letter and read it very slowly. It was stern and almost unfeeling in the calmness of the words chosen; but in those words her proposed marriage with Harry Clavering was absolutely abandoned. "I know," she said, "that your son is more warmly attached to another lady than he is to me, and under those circumstances, for his sake as well as for mine, it is necessary that we should part. Dear Mrs. Clavering, may I ask you to make him understand that he and I are never to recur to the past? If he will send me back any letters of mine,—should any have been kept,—and the little present which I once gave him, all will have been done which need be done, and all have been said which need be said. He will receive in a small parcel his own letters and the gifts which he has made me." There was in this a tone of completeness,—as of a business absolutely finished,—of a judgment admitting no appeal, which did not at all suit Mrs. Burton's views. A letter, quite as becoming on the part of Florence, might, she thought, be written, which would still leave open a door for reconciliation. But Florence was resolved, and the letter was sent.

Mrs. Burton opened the letter and read it very slowly. It was stern and almost emotionless in the calmness of the words chosen; but in those words, her proposed marriage with Harry Clavering was completely abandoned. "I know," she said, "that your son is more attached to another lady than to me, and given those circumstances, for his sake as well as mine, we need to part ways. Dear Mrs. Clavering, could you please help him understand that he and I should never dwell on the past? If he could send back any letters of mine—if any were kept—and the little gift I once gave him, that will have taken care of everything that needs to be done and everything that needs to be said. He will receive a small package with his own letters and the gifts he has given me." There was a finality in this—like a business matter thoroughly settled—of a verdict that allowed no appeal, which did not sit well with Mrs. Burton's views. She thought a letter, just as appropriate from Florence, could be written that would still leave the door open for reconciliation. But Florence was determined, and the letter was sent.

The part which Mrs. Burton had taken in this conversation had surprised even herself. She had been full of anger with Harry Clavering,—as wrathful with him as her nature permitted her to be; and yet she had pleaded his cause with all her eloquence, going almost so far in her defence of him as to declare that he was blameless. And in truth she was prepared to acquit him of blame,—to give him full absolution without penance,—if only he could be brought back again into the fold. Her wrath against him would be very hot should he not so return;—but all should be more than forgiven if he would only come back, and do his duty with affectionate and patient fidelity. Her desire was, not so much that justice should be done, as that Florence should have the thing coveted, and that Florence's rival should not have it. According to the arguments, as arranged by her feminine logic, Harry Clavering would be all right or all wrong according as he might at last bear himself. She desired success, and, if she could only be successful, was prepared to forgive everything. And even yet she would not give up the battle, though she admitted to herself that Florence's letter to Mrs. Clavering made the contest more difficult than ever. It might, however, be that Mrs. Clavering would be good enough, just enough, true enough, clever enough, to know that such a letter as this, coming from such a girl and written under such circumstances, should be taken as meaning nothing. Most mothers would wish to see their sons married to wealth, should wealth throw itself in their way;—but Mrs. Clavering, possibly, might not be such a mother as that.

The role that Mrs. Burton played in this conversation surprised even her. She had been really angry with Harry Clavering—angrier than her nature usually allowed; yet she had argued in his defense with all her passion, even going as far as to say he was blameless. In fact, she was ready to clear him of any wrongdoing—ready to grant him full forgiveness without any consequences—if only he could be brought back into the fold. Her anger towards him would be intense if he didn’t return; but everything would be more than forgiven if he came back and fulfilled his duties with love and patience. Her main concern was not so much that justice be served, but that Florence should get what she wanted, and that Florence's rival should not have it. According to her reasoning, Harry Clavering would either be completely right or completely wrong based on how he ultimately behaved. She wanted him to succeed, and if she could achieve that, she was willing to overlook everything. Even now, she wouldn’t give up the fight, although she acknowledged to herself that Florence's letter to Mrs. Clavering made things tougher than ever. However, it might be that Mrs. Clavering would be understanding enough, fair enough, genuine enough, and clever enough to realize that a letter like this, coming from such a girl and written under such circumstances, should be considered meaningless. Most mothers would prefer to see their sons marry into money if the opportunity came up; but Mrs. Clavering might not be that kind of mother.

In the meantime there was before her the terrible necessity of explaining to her husband the step which she had taken without his knowledge, and of which she knew that she must tell him the history before she could sit down to dinner with him in comfort. "Theodore," she said, creeping in out of her own chamber to his dressing-room, while he was washing his hands, "you mustn't be angry with me, but I have done something to-day."

In the meantime, she faced the awful obligation of explaining to her husband the decision she had made without telling him first, and she knew she had to share the full story before she could sit down to dinner with him comfortably. "Theodore," she said, quietly entering his dressing room while he was washing his hands, "please don't be mad at me, but I did something today."

"And why must I not be angry with you?"

"And why shouldn't I be angry with you?"

"You know what I mean. You mustn't be angry—especially about this,—because I don't want you to be."

"You know what I mean. You shouldn’t be upset—especially about this—because I don’t want you to be."

"That's conclusive," said he. It was manifest to her that he was in a good humour, which was a great blessing. He had not been tried with his work as he was often wont to be, and was therefore willing to be playful.

"That's definitive," he said. It was clear to her that he was in a good mood, which was a relief. He hadn't been stressed by his work as he usually was, and as a result, he was ready to be playful.

"What do you think I've done?" said she. "I have been to Bolton Street and have seen Lady Ongar."

"What do you think I've done?" she said. "I've been to Bolton Street and met with Lady Ongar."

"No!"

"No way!"

"I have, Theodore, indeed."

"I do, Theodore, indeed."

Mr. Burton had been rubbing his face vehemently with a rough towel at the moment in which the communication had been made to him, and so strongly was he affected by it that he was stopped in his operation and brought to a stand in his movement, looking at his wife over the towel as he held it in both his hands. "What on earth has made you do such a thing as that?" he said.

Mr. Burton was vigorously rubbing his face with a rough towel when he received the news, and he was so taken aback that he paused, staring at his wife over the towel he held in both hands. "What on earth made you do that?" he asked.

"I thought it best. I thought that I might hear the truth,—and so I have. I could not bear that Florence should be sacrificed whilst anything remained undone that was possible."

"I thought it was the right thing to do. I believed I might finally hear the truth—and I have. I couldn't stand the idea of Florence being sacrificed while there was still something I could do."

"Why didn't you tell me that you were going?"

"Why didn't you tell me you were going?"

"Well, my dear; I thought it better not. Of course I ought to have told you, but in this instance I thought it best just to go without the fuss of mentioning it."

"Well, my dear; I thought it was better not to. Of course, I should have told you, but in this case, I thought it was best to just go without the hassle of bringing it up."

"What you really mean is, that if you had told me I should have asked you not to go."

"What you really mean is that if you had told me, I would have asked you not to go."

"Exactly."

"Exactly."

"And you were determined to have your own way."

"And you were set on getting your way."

"I don't think, Theodore, I care so much about my own way as some women do. I am sure I always think your opinion is better than my own;—that is, in most things."

"I don't think, Theodore, I care as much about my own preferences as some women do. I'm sure I usually believe your opinion is better than mine;—well, in most things."

"And what did Lady Ongar say to you?" He had now put down the towel, and was seated in his arm-chair, looking up into his wife's face.

"And what did Lady Ongar say to you?" He had now set the towel aside and was sitting in his armchair, looking up at his wife's face.

"It would be a long story to tell you all that she said."

"It would take a long time to explain everything she said."

"Was she civil to you?"

"Was she nice to you?"

"She was not uncivil. She is a handsome, proud woman, prone to speak out what she thinks and determined to have her own way when it is possible; but I think that she intended to be civil to me personally."

"She wasn't rude. She's an attractive, confident woman, likely to voice her opinions and set on getting her way when she can; but I believe she meant to be polite to me personally."

"What is her purpose now?"

"What's her purpose now?"

"Her purpose is clear enough. She means to marry Harry Clavering if she can get him. She said so. She made no secret of what her wishes are."

"Her intentions are pretty straightforward. She wants to marry Harry Clavering if she can. She’s said it outright. She hasn’t hidden what she wants."

"Then, Cissy, let her marry him, and do not let us trouble ourselves further in the matter."

"Then, Cissy, let her marry him, and let's not worry about it anymore."

"But Florence, Theodore! Think of Florence!"

"But Florence, Theodore! Just think about Florence!"

"I am thinking of her, and I think that Harry Clavering is not worth her acceptance. She is as the traveller that fell among thieves. She is hurt and wounded, but not dead. It is for you to be the Good Samaritan, but the oil which you should pour into her wounds is not a renewed hope as to that worthless man. Let Lady Ongar have him. As far as I can see, they are fit for each other."

"I’m thinking about her, and I don’t believe Harry Clavering is worth her time. She’s like a traveler who got attacked by thieves. She’s hurt and damaged, but not dead. It’s up to you to be the Good Samaritan, but the comfort you should offer her isn’t a renewed hope for that worthless guy. Let Lady Ongar have him. From what I can tell, they’re perfect for each other."

Then she went through with him, diligently, all the arguments which she had used with Florence, palliating Harry's conduct, and explaining the circumstances of his disloyalty, almost as those circumstances had in truth occurred. "I think you are too hard on him," she said. "You can't be too hard on falsehood," he replied. "No, not while it exists. But you would not be angry with a man for ever, because he should once have been false? But we do not know that he is false." "Do we not?" said he. "But never mind; we must go to dinner now. Does Florence know of your visit?" Then, before she would allow him to leave his room, she explained to him what had taken place between herself and Florence, and told him of the letter that had been written to Mrs. Clavering. "She is right," said he. "That way out of her difficulty is the best that is left to her." But, nevertheless, Mrs. Burton was resolved that she would not as yet surrender.

Then she went through all the arguments she had used with Florence, carefully justifying Harry's behavior and explaining the reasons behind his disloyalty, almost as if they were the real facts. "I think you're being too hard on him," she said. "You can't be too hard on dishonesty," he replied. "No, not while it exists. But you wouldn't stay mad at a guy forever just because he was unfaithful once? And we don’t even know if he is unfaithful." "Don’t we?" he said. "Anyway, we have to go to dinner now. Does Florence know you’re here?" Then, before she let him leave his room, she filled him in on what happened between her and Florence and told him about the letter written to Mrs. Clavering. "She’s right," he said. "That’s the best solution she has." But still, Mrs. Burton was determined not to give in just yet.

Theodore Burton, when he reached the drawing-room, went up to his sister and kissed her. Such a sign of the tenderness of love was not common with him, for he was one of those who are not usually demonstrative in their affection. At the present moment he said nothing of what was passing in his mind, nor did she. She simply raised her face to meet his lips, and pressed his hand as she held it. What need was there of any further sign between them than this? Then they went to dinner, and their meal was eaten almost in silence. Almost every moment Cecilia's eye was on her sister-in-law. A careful observer, had there been one there, might have seen this; but, while they remained together downstairs, there occurred among them nothing else to mark that all was not well with them.

Theodore Burton, when he entered the living room, walked up to his sister and kissed her. Such a display of affection was unusual for him, as he wasn’t typically openly emotional. At that moment, he didn’t share what was on his mind, and neither did she. She simply lifted her face to his and held his hand tightly. What more did they need to express their bond? They then went to dinner, and their meal was almost silent. Almost every moment, Cecilia's gaze was on her sister-in-law. A careful observer, if there had been one present, might have noticed this; however, while they were together downstairs, nothing else happened to indicate that things were not okay between them.

Nor would the brother have spoken a word during the evening on the subject that was so near to all their hearts had not Florence led the way. When they were at tea, and when Cecilia had already made up her mind that there was to be no further discussion that night, Florence suddenly broke forth.

Nor would the brother have said a word that evening about the topic that meant so much to all of them if Florence hadn't brought it up. When they were having tea, and Cecilia had already decided there would be no more discussion that night, Florence suddenly spoke up.

"Theodore," she said, "I have been thinking much about it, and I believe I had better go home, to Stratton, to-morrow."

"Theodore," she said, "I've been thinking a lot about it, and I think I should go home to Stratton tomorrow."

"Oh, no," said Cecilia, eagerly.

"Oh no," said Cecilia, eagerly.

"I believe it will be better that I should," continued Florence. "I suppose it is very weak in me to own it; but I am unhappy, and, like the wounded bird, I feel that it will be well that I should hide myself."

"I think it’s better if I do," Florence continued. "I guess it’s pretty weak of me to admit it, but I’m unhappy, and like a wounded bird, I feel that it’s best for me to hide away."

Cecilia was at her feet in a moment. "Dearest Flo," she said. "Is not this your home as well as Stratton?"

Cecilia was on her feet in an instant. "Dear Flo," she said. "Isn't this your home just like Stratton?"

"When I am able to be happy it is. Those who have light hearts may have more homes than one; but it is not so with those whose hearts are heavy. I think it will be best for me to go."

"When I can be happy, I am. Those with light hearts might have more than one home; but that’s not true for those whose hearts are heavy. I think it’s best for me to leave."

"You shall do exactly as you please," said her brother. "In such a matter I will not try to persuade you. I only wish that we could tend to comfort you."

"You can do whatever you want," her brother said. "I won’t try to convince you in this situation. I just wish we could help you feel better."

"You do comfort me. If I know that you think I am doing right, that will comfort me more than anything. Absolute and immediate comfort is not to be had when one is sorrowful."

"You really comfort me. Knowing that you believe I'm doing the right thing comforts me more than anything else. You can't always find complete and instant comfort when you're feeling sad."

"No, indeed," said her brother. "Sorrow should not be killed too quickly. I always think that those who are impervious to grief must be impervious also to happiness. If you have feelings capable of the one, you must have them capable also of the other!"

"No, definitely," her brother said. "We shouldn't rush to get rid of sorrow. I always believe that those who can't feel grief are also unable to feel happiness. If you're capable of feeling one, you must be capable of feeling the other too!"

"You should wait, at any rate, till you get an answer from Mrs. Clavering," said Cecilia.

"You should wait, at least, until you hear back from Mrs. Clavering," said Cecilia.

"I do not know that she has any answer to send to me."

"I don't know if she has any answer to send me."

"Oh, yes; she must answer you, if you will think of it. If she accepts what you have said—"

"Oh, yes; she has to respond to you, if you consider it. If she agrees with what you’ve said—"

"She cannot but accept it."

"She has to accept it."

"Then she must reply to you. There is something which you have asked her to send to you; and I think you should wait, at any rate, till it reaches you here. Mind I do not think her answer will be of that nature; but it is clear that you should wait for it whatever it may be." Then Florence, with the concurrence of her brother's opinion, consented to remain in London for a few days, expecting the answer which would be sent by Mrs. Clavering;—and after that no further discussion took place as to her trouble.

"Then she needs to get back to you. There's something you asked her to send you, and I think you should wait for it to arrive here. Just so you know, I don't believe her response will be like that, but it's obvious you should wait for it, no matter what it is." Then Florence, agreeing with her brother's view, agreed to stay in London for a few days, waiting for the answer that Mrs. Clavering would send;—and after that, there was no more discussion about her concerns.

 

 

CHAPTER XLI.

THE SHEEP RETURNS TO THE FOLD.

Harry Clavering had spoken solemn words to his mother, during his illness, which both he and she regarded as a promise that Florence should not be deserted by him. After that promise nothing more was said between them on the subject for a few days. Mrs. Clavering was contented that the promise had been made, and Harry himself, in the weakness consequent upon his illness, was willing enough to accept the excuse which his illness gave him for postponing any action in the matter. But the fever had left him, and he was sitting up in his mother's room, when Florence's letter reached the parsonage,—and, with the letter, the little parcel which she herself had packed up so carefully. On the day before that a few words had passed between the rector and his wife, which will explain the feelings of both of them in the matter.

Harry Clavering had made serious promises to his mother during his illness, promises that both he and she saw as a commitment not to abandon Florence. After that promise, they didn't talk about it for a few days. Mrs. Clavering felt reassured that he had made the promise, and Harry, still weak from his illness, was glad to have an excuse to delay any actions on the matter. However, the fever had passed, and he was sitting up in his mother's room when Florence's letter arrived at the parsonage—along with a little package that she had carefully put together. The day before, a few words had been exchanged between the rector and his wife that would clarify their feelings on the situation.

"Have you heard," said he,—speaking in a voice hardly above a whisper, although no third person was in the room,—"that Harry is again thinking of making Julia his wife?"

"Have you heard," he said, speaking in a voice barely above a whisper, even though there was no one else in the room, "that Harry is thinking about making Julia his wife again?"

"He is not thinking of doing so," said Mrs. Clavering. "They who say so, do him wrong."

"He isn't thinking of doing that," Mrs. Clavering said. "Those who say otherwise are wronging him."

"It would be a great thing for him as regards money."

"It would be a great thing for him in terms of money."

"But he is engaged,—and Florence Burton has been received here as his future wife. I could not endure to think that it should be so. At any rate, it is not true."

"But he is engaged, and Florence Burton has been accepted here as his future wife. I can’t stand the thought of it being true. Anyway, it’s not true."

"I only tell you what I heard," said the rector, gently sighing, partly in obedience to his wife's implied rebuke, and partly at the thought that so grand a marriage should not be within his son's reach. The rector was beginning to be aware that Harry would hardly make a fortune at the profession which he had chosen, and that a rich marriage would be an easy way out of all the difficulties which such a failure promised. The rector was a man who dearly loved easy ways out of difficulties. But in such matters as these his wife he knew was imperative and powerful, and he lacked the courage to plead for a cause that was prudent, but ungenerous.

"I’m just sharing what I heard," said the rector, letting out a soft sigh, partly because of his wife's unspoken criticism, and partly because it seemed unfair that such an impressive marriage was out of his son's reach. The rector was starting to realize that Harry probably wouldn’t make a lot of money in the career he had chosen, and that marrying someone wealthy would be an easy solution to the challenges that such a failure might bring. The rector was someone who truly appreciated easy solutions to problems. But when it came to these issues, he knew his wife was firm and influential, and he didn’t have the courage to advocate for a solution that might be practical, but felt unkind.

When Mrs. Clavering received the letter and parcel on the next morning, Harry Clavering was still in bed. With the delightful privilege of a convalescent invalid, he was allowed in these days to get up just when getting up became more comfortable than lying in bed, and that time did not usually come till eleven o'clock was past;—but the postman reached the Clavering parsonage by nine. The letter, as we know, was addressed to Mrs. Clavering herself, as was also the outer envelope which contained the packet; but the packet itself was addressed in Florence's clear handwriting to Harry Clavering, Esq. "That is a large parcel to come by post, mamma," said Fanny.

When Mrs. Clavering got the letter and package the next morning, Harry Clavering was still in bed. Enjoying the nice perk of being a recovering patient, he could stay in bed until it felt more comfortable to get up, which usually wasn't until after eleven; however, the postman arrived at the Clavering parsonage by nine. The letter, as we know, was addressed to Mrs. Clavering, as was the outer envelope containing the package; but the package itself was addressed in Florence's clear handwriting to Harry Clavering, Esq. "That's a big package to come through the mail, Mom," said Fanny.

"Yes, my dear; but it is something particular."

"Yes, my dear; but it's something special."

"It's from some tradesman, I suppose?" said the rector.

"It's from some tradesman, I guess?" said the rector.

"No; it's not from a tradesman," said Mrs. Clavering. But she said nothing further, and both husband and daughter perceived that it was not intended that they should ask further questions.

"No; it's not from a tradesman," Mrs. Clavering said. But she didn't say anything more, and both her husband and daughter understood that they weren't supposed to ask any more questions.

Fanny, as usual, had taken her brother his breakfast, and Mrs. Clavering did not go up to him till that ceremony had been completed and removed. Indeed it was necessary that she should study Florence's letter in her own room before she could speak to him about it. What the parcel contained she well knew, even before the letter had been thoroughly read; and I need hardly say that the treasure was sacred in her hands. When she had finished the perusal of the letter there was a tear,—a gentle tear, in each eye. She understood it all, and could fathom the strength and weakness of every word which Florence had written. But she was such a woman,—exactly such a woman,—as Cecilia Burton had pictured to herself. Mrs. Clavering was good enough, great enough, true enough, clever enough to know that Harry's love for Florence should be sustained, and his fancy for Lady Ongar overcome. At no time would she have been proud to see her son prosperous only in the prosperity of a wife's fortune; but she would have been thoroughly ashamed of him, had he resolved to pursue such prosperity under his present circumstances.

Fanny, as always, had taken her brother his breakfast, and Mrs. Clavering didn’t go up to him until that ritual was finished and cleared away. In fact, it was important for her to read Florence's letter in her own room before she could talk to him about it. She knew exactly what the parcel contained, even before she read the letter completely; and I hardly need to say that the treasure was sacred in her hands. When she finished reading the letter, there was a tear—a gentle tear—in each eye. She understood everything and could grasp the strength and weakness behind every word Florence had written. But she was just the kind of woman Cecilia Burton had imagined. Mrs. Clavering was kind enough, strong enough, genuine enough, and smart enough to realize that Harry's love for Florence should be encouraged, and his attraction to Lady Ongar should be let go. She would never have felt proud to see her son succeed solely because of his wife's wealth; however, she would have been deeply ashamed of him if he chose to seek that success under the current circumstances.

But her tears,—though they were there in the corners of her eyes,—were not painful tears. Dear Florence! She was suffering bitterly now. This very day would be a day of agony to her. There had been for her, doubtless, many days of agony during the past month. That the letter was true in all its words Mrs. Clavering did not doubt. That Florence believed that all was over between her and Harry, Mrs. Clavering was as sure as Florence had intended that she should be. But all should not be over, and the days of agony should soon be at an end. Her boy had promised her, and to her he had always been true. And she understood, too, the way in which these dangers had come upon him, and her judgment was not heavy upon her son;—her gracious boy, who had ever been so good to her! It might be that he had been less diligent at his work than he should have been,—that on that account further delay would still be necessary; but Florence would forgive that, and he had promised that Florence should not be deserted.

But her tears—even though they were pooling in the corners of her eyes—were not painful tears. Dear Florence! She was in deep pain now. This day would be incredibly hard for her. She had undoubtedly experienced many tough days over the past month. Mrs. Clavering was certain that the letter was true in every word. She also knew that Florence believed everything was over between her and Harry, and Mrs. Clavering was just as sure as Florence had meant her to be. But it shouldn't be over, and the days of suffering would soon come to an end. Her son had made her a promise, and he had always been honest with her. She also understood how these troubles had come to him, and she didn't blame her son too harshly;—her wonderful boy, who had always treated her so kindly! It might be that he had been less committed to his work than he should have been—that he might need more time because of that; but Florence would forgive him, and he had promised that Florence would not be abandoned.

Then she took the parcel in her hands, and considered all its circumstances,—how precious had once been its contents, and how precious doubtless they still were, though they had been thus repudiated! And she thought of the moments,—nay, rather of the hours,—which had been passed in the packing of that little packet. She well understood how a girl would linger over such dear pain, touching the things over and over again, allowing herself to read morsels of the letters at which she had already forbidden herself even to look,—till every word had been again seen and weighed, again caressed and again abjured. She knew how those little trinkets would have been fondled! How salt had been the tears that had fallen on them, and how carefully the drops would have been removed. Every fold in the paper of the two envelopes, with the little morsels of wax just adequate for their purpose, told of the lingering painful care with which the work had been done. Ah! the parcel should go back at once with words of love that should put an end to all that pain! She, who had sent these loved things away, should have her letters again, and should touch her little treasures with fingers that should take pleasure in the touching. She should again read her lover's words with an enduring delight. Mrs. Clavering understood it all, as though she also were still a girl with a lover of her own.

Then she picked up the package and thought about everything surrounding it — how precious its contents had once been and how precious they still were, even though they had been rejected! She remembered the moments — or rather the hours — spent packing that little bundle. She knew how a girl would linger over such sweet pain, touching everything repeatedly, letting herself read snippets of the letters she had vowed not to even glance at — until every word had been seen and weighed again, caressed and then put aside once more. She understood how those little trinkets would have been cherished! How salty the tears that had fallen on them were, and how carefully they would have been wiped away. Every crease in the paper of the two envelopes, along with the little bits of wax just enough for sealing, spoke of the lingering, painful care with which it had all been done. Ah! The package should be sent back immediately with words of love to end all that hurt! She, who had sent these cherished items away, should have her letters back and should touch her little treasures with fingers that would enjoy the experience. She should once again read her lover's words with lasting joy. Mrs. Clavering understood it all, as if she too were still a girl with a lover of her own.

Harry was beginning to think that the time had come in which getting up would be more comfortable than lying in bed, when his mother knocked at his door and entered his room. "I was just going to make a move, mother," he said, having reached that stage of convalescence in which some shame comes upon the idler.

Harry was starting to feel like it was time to get up because it would be more comfortable than lying in bed, when his mom knocked on his door and walked into his room. "I was just about to get moving, Mom," he said, having reached that point in his recovery where he felt a bit embarrassed about being so lazy.

"But I want to speak to you first, my dear," said Mrs. Clavering. "I have got a letter for you, or rather a parcel." Harry held out his hand, and taking the packet, at once recognized the writing of the address.

"But I want to talk to you first, my dear," said Mrs. Clavering. "I have a letter for you, or actually a package." Harry reached out his hand, and as he took the packet, he immediately recognized the handwriting on the address.

"You know from whom it comes, Harry?"

"You know who it's from, Harry?"

"Oh, yes, mother."

"Sure thing, Mom."

"And do you know what it contains?" Harry, still holding the packet, looked at it, but said nothing. "I know," said his mother; "for she has written and told me. Will you see her letter to me?" Again Harry held out his hand, but his mother did not at once give him the letter. "First of all, my dear, let us know that we understand each other. This dear girl,—to me she is inexpressibly dear,—is to be your wife?"

"And do you know what's in it?" Harry, still holding the packet, looked at it but didn't say anything. "I do," his mom replied, "because she wrote and told me. Would you like to see her letter?" Harry reached out for the letter again, but his mom didn't immediately hand it over. "First, my dear, let's make sure we understand each other. This precious girl—she means the world to me—is going to be your wife?"

"Yes, mother;—it shall be so."

"Yes, mom; it will be done."

The sheep returns to the fold.
The sheep comes back to the flock.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"That is my own boy! Harry, I have never doubted you;—have never doubted that you would be right at last. Now you shall see her letter. But you must remember that she has had cause to make her unhappy."

"That's my own boy! Harry, I’ve never doubted you; I’ve never thought you wouldn’t get it right in the end. Now you’ll see her letter. But you need to remember that she has her reasons for being upset."

"I will remember."

"I'll remember."

"Had you not been ill, everything would of course have been all right before now." As to the correctness of this assertion the reader probably will have doubts of his own. Then she handed him the letter, and sat on his bed-side while he read it. At first he was startled, and made almost indignant at the firmness of the girl's words. She gave him up as though it were a thing quite decided, and uttered no expression of her own regret in doing so. There was no soft woman's wail in her words. But there was in them something which made him unconsciously long to get back the thing which he had so nearly thrown away from him. They inspired him with a doubt whether he might yet succeed, which very doubt greatly increased his desire. As he read the letter for the second time, Julia became less beautiful in his imagination, and the charm of Florence's character became stronger.

"Had you not been sick, everything would have obviously been fine by now." The reader will likely have their own doubts about this claim. She then handed him the letter and sat by his bedside while he read it. At first, he was taken aback and felt almost offended by the firmness of her words. She let him go as if it were a done deal, and didn’t show any sign of her own regret in doing so. There was no soft, sorrowful tone in her words. Yet, there was something in them that made him unconsciously want to reclaim what he had so nearly cast aside. They filled him with uncertainty about whether he might still succeed, and that very uncertainty fueled his desire even more. As he read the letter for the second time, Julia seemed less appealing in his mind, and the allure of Florence’s character grew stronger.

"Well, dear?" said his mother, when she saw that he had finished the second reading of the epistle.

"Well, dear?" his mother said when she noticed he had finished reading the letter for the second time.

He hardly knew how to express, even to his mother, all his feelings,—the shame that he felt, and with the shame something of indignation that he should have been so repulsed. And of his love, too, he was afraid to speak. He was willing enough to give the required assurance, but after that he would have preferred to have been left alone. But his mother could not leave him without some further word of agreement between them as to the course which they would pursue.

He barely knew how to express his feelings, even to his mom—the shame he felt, and with that shame, a bit of anger at how repulsed he had been. He was also scared to talk about his love. He was happy to give the necessary reassurance, but after that, he would have preferred to be left alone. However, his mom couldn't just walk away without some further agreement on the path they would take together.

"Will you write to her, mother, or shall I?"

"Will you write to her, Mom, or should I?"

"I shall write, certainly,—by to-day's post. I would not leave her an hour, if I could help it, without an assurance of your unaltered affection."

"I will definitely write—by today's mail. I wouldn't want to leave her for even an hour, if I could avoid it, without knowing that your feelings for her haven't changed."

"I could go to town to-morrow, mother;—could I not?"

"I can go to town tomorrow, mom; right?"

"Not to-morrow, Harry. It would be foolish. Say on Monday."

"Not tomorrow, Harry. That would be silly. Let's say Monday."

"And you will write to-day?"

"And you will write today?"

"Certainly."

"Sure."

"I will send a line also,—just a line."

"I'll send a quick note too—just a quick note."

"And the parcel?"

"And the package?"

"I have not opened it yet."

"I haven't checked it yet."

"You know what it contains. Send it back at once, Harry;—at once. If I understand her feelings, she will not be happy till she gets it into her hands again. We will send Jem over to the post-office, and have it registered."

"You know what's inside it. Send it back right away, Harry;—right away. If I grasp her feelings, she won't be happy until she has it in her hands again. We'll send Jem to the post office to have it registered."

When so much was settled, Mrs. Clavering went away about the affairs of her house, thinking as she did so of the loving words with which she would strive to give back happiness to Florence Burton.

When everything was settled, Mrs. Clavering went off to take care of her home, thinking about the caring words she would use to try to bring happiness back to Florence Burton.

Harry, when he was alone, slowly opened the parcel. He could not resist the temptation of doing this, and of looking again at the things which she had sent back to him. And he was not without an idea,—perhaps a hope—that there might be with them some short note,—some scrap containing a few words for himself. If he had any such hope he was disappointed. There were his own letters, all scented with lavender from the casket in which they had been preserved; there was the rich bracelet which had been given with some little ceremony, and the cheap brooch which he had thrown to her as a joke, and which she had sworn that she would value the most of all because she could wear it every day; and there was the pencil-case which he had fixed on to her watch-chain, while her fingers were touching his fingers, caressing him for his love while her words were rebuking him for his awkwardness. He remembered it all as the things lay strewed upon his bed. And he re-read every word of his own words. "What a fool a man makes of himself," he said to himself at last, with something of the cheeriness of laughter about his heart. But as he said so he was quite ready to make himself a fool after the same fashion again,—if only there were not in his way that difficulty of recommencing. Had it been possible for him to write again at once in the old strain,—without any reference to his own conduct during the last month, he would have begun his fooling without waiting to finish his dressing.

Harry, when he was alone, slowly opened the package. He couldn't help the urge to look again at the items she had sent back to him. And he hoped—maybe wished—that there might be a short note included—a little message just for him. If he had any such hope, he quickly found himself disappointed. There were his own letters, all scented with lavender from the box they had been kept in; there was the nice bracelet that had been given with some ceremony, and the cheap brooch he had tossed to her as a joke, which she had insisted she would treasure the most because she could wear it every day; and there was the pencil case he had attached to her watch chain while her fingers brushed against his, affectionately caressing him for his love even as her words scolded him for being clumsy. He remembered it all as he looked at the things scattered on his bed. And he reread every word he had written. "What a fool a man makes of himself," he thought to himself eventually, feeling a bit light-hearted about it. But even as he thought this, he was ready to make a fool of himself like that again—if only he didn't have the hurdle of starting over. If he could have written immediately in the same way—without mentioning his behavior over the last month, he would have jumped right into it without even finishing getting dressed.

"Did you open the parcel?" his mother asked him, some hour or so before it was necessary that Jem should be started on his mission.

"Did you open the package?" his mother asked him about an hour before Jem needed to set off on his mission.

"Yes; I thought it best to open it."

"Yeah, I thought it was best to open it."

"And have you made it up again?"

"And have you patched things up again?"

"Not yet, mother."

"Not yet, Mom."

"Put this with it, dear." And his mother gave him a little jewel, a cupid in mosaic surrounded by tiny diamonds, which he remembered her to wear ever since he had first noticed the things she had worn. "Not from me, mind. I give it to you. Come;—will you trust me to pack them?" Then Mrs. Clavering again made up the parcel, and added the trinket which she had brought with her.

"Put this with it, honey." And his mom handed him a small jewel, a mosaic cupid surrounded by tiny diamonds, which he remembered her wearing ever since he first started noticing her jewelry. "Not from me, just so you know. I’m giving it to you. Come on; will you let me pack them?" Then Mrs. Clavering made up the parcel again and added the trinket she had brought with her.

Harry at last brought himself to write a few words. "Dearest, dearest Florence,—They will not let me out, or I would go to you at once. My mother has written, and though I have not seen her letter, I know what it contains. Indeed, indeed you may believe it all. May I not venture to return the parcel? I do send it back and implore you to keep it. I shall be in town, I think, on Monday, and will go to Onslow Crescent,—instantly. Your own, H. C." Then there was scrawled a postscript which was worth all the rest put together,—was better than his own note, better than his mother's letter, better than the returned packet. "I love no one better than you;—no one half so well,—neither now, nor ever did." These words, whether wholly true or only partially so, were at least to the point; and were taken by Cecilia Burton, when she heard of them, as a confession of faith that demanded instant and plenary absolution.

Harry finally gathered the courage to write a few words. "Dearest, dearest Florence,—They won't let me out, or I would come to you right away. My mom has written, and even though I haven't seen her letter, I know what it says. You can definitely believe it all. Can I return the parcel? I'm sending it back and begging you to keep it. I think I'll be in town on Monday, and I'll go to Onslow Crescent—immediately. Yours, H. C." Then there was a postscript that was worth more than everything else combined—it was better than his own note, better than his mom's letter, better than the returned package. "I love no one more than you;—no one even half as much,—not now, nor ever did." These words, whether completely true or just partially, were at least to the point; and when Cecilia Burton heard them, she took it as a declaration of faith that needed instant and full forgiveness.

The trouble which had called Harry down to Clavering remained, I regret to say, almost in full force now that his prolonged visit had been brought so near its close. Mr. Saul, indeed, had agreed to resign his curacy, and was already on the look-out for similar employment in some other parish. And since his interview with Fanny's father he had never entered the rectory, or spoken to Fanny. Fanny had promised that there should be no such speaking, and indeed no danger of that kind was feared. Whatever Mr. Saul might do he would do openly,—nay, audaciously. But though there existed this security, nevertheless things as regarded Fanny were very unpleasant. When Mr. Saul had commenced his courtship, she had agreed with her family in almost ridiculing the idea of such a lover. There had been a feeling with her as with the others that poor Mr. Saul was to be pitied. Then she had come to regard his overtures as matters of grave import,—not indeed avowing to her mother anything so strong as a return of his affection, but speaking of his proposal as one to which there was no other objection than that of a want of money. Now, however, she went moping about the house as though she were a victim of true love, condemned to run unsmoothly for ever; as though her passion for Mr. Saul were too much for her, and she were waiting in patience till death should relieve her from the cruelty of her parents. She never complained. Such victims never do complain. But she moped and was wretched, and when her mother questioned her, struggling to find out how strong this feeling might in truth be, Fanny would simply make her dutiful promises,—promises which were wickedly dutiful,—that she would never mention the name of Mr. Saul any more. Mr. Saul in the meantime went about his parish duties with grim energy, supplying the rector's shortcomings without a word. He would have been glad to preach all the sermons and read all the services during these six months, had he been allowed to do so. He was constant in the schools,—more constant than ever in his visitings. He was very courteous to Mr. Clavering when the necessities of their position brought them together. For all this Mr. Clavering hated him,—unjustly. For a man placed as Mr. Saul was placed a line of conduct exactly level with that previously followed is impossible, and it was better that he should become more energetic in his duties than less so. It will be easily understood that all these things interfered much with the general happiness of the family at the rectory at this time.

The issues that brought Harry down to Clavering were, unfortunately, still very much present now that his long visit was nearing its end. Mr. Saul had agreed to resign his position, and he was already looking for a similar job in another parish. Since his meeting with Fanny's father, he hadn't entered the rectory or spoken to Fanny. Fanny had assured that there would be no speaking, and there was no fear of that happening. Whatever Mr. Saul decided to do, he would do it openly—perhaps even boldly. But despite this assurance, things were quite uncomfortable for Fanny. When Mr. Saul first started pursuing her, she and her family had almost laughed off the idea of him as a suitor. They all felt a bit sorry for poor Mr. Saul. Then she began to see his advances as serious matters—not admitting to her mother that she felt anything strong for him, but saying that the only real issue with his proposal was a lack of money. Now, though, she wandered around the house looking like a victim of true love, doomed to an unhappy fate; as if her feelings for Mr. Saul were overwhelming, and she was just waiting patiently for death to free her from her parents' cruelty. She never complained. Victims like her seldom do. But she was downcast and miserable, and when her mother questioned her, trying to gauge how strong her feelings really were, Fanny would simply make dutiful promises—promises that were wickedly dutiful—that she would never mention Mr. Saul's name again. Meanwhile, Mr. Saul was diligently carrying out his parish duties with grim determination, filling in the rector's shortcomings without a word. He would have loved to preach every sermon and conduct all services in those six months if he had been allowed. He was always present at the schools and more committed than ever in his visits. He was very polite to Mr. Clavering whenever their positions forced them to interact. For all this, Mr. Clavering unjustly hated him. For someone in Mr. Saul's position, it was impossible to maintain the same conduct as before, and it was better for him to be more diligent in his duties than less so. It's easy to see that all of this significantly impacted the overall happiness of the family at the rectory during this time.

The Monday came, and Harry Clavering, now convalescent and simply interesting from the remaining effects of his illness, started on his journey for London. There had come no further letters from Onslow Terrace to the parsonage, and, indeed, owing to the intervention of Sunday, none could have come unless Florence had written by return of post. Harry made his journey, beginning it with some promise of happiness to himself,—but becoming somewhat uneasy as his train drew near to London. He had behaved badly, and he knew that in the first place he must own that he had done so. To men such a necessity is always grievous. Women not unfrequently like the task. To confess, submit, and be accepted as confessing and submitting, comes naturally to the feminine mind. The cry of peccavi sounds soft and pretty when made by sweet lips in a loving voice. But a man who can own that he has done amiss without a pang,—who can so own it to another man, or even to a woman,—is usually but a poor creature. Harry must now make such confession, and therefore he became uneasy. And then, for him, there was another task behind the one which he would be called upon to perform this evening,—a task which would have nothing of pleasantness in it to redeem its pain. He must confess not only to Florence,—where his confession might probably have its reward,—but he must confess also to Julia. This second confession would, indeed, be a hard task to him. That, however, was to be postponed till the morrow. On this evening he had pledged himself that he would go direct to Onslow Terrace; and this he did as soon after he had reached his lodgings as was possible. It was past six when he reached London, and it was not yet eight when, with palpitating heart, he knocked at Mr. Burton's door.

The Monday arrived, and Harry Clavering, now recovering and still somewhat interesting from the aftereffects of his illness, set off for London. No further letters had come from Onslow Terrace to the parsonage, and since it was Sunday, none could have arrived unless Florence had sent one by return post. Harry began his journey with some hope for happiness but started to feel uneasy as his train approached London. He knew he had acted poorly, and he realized he needed to admit that first. For men, such a requirement is always painful. Women often find that task easier. To confess, accept blame, and be seen as doing so feels natural for them. The word "peccavi" sounds soft and sweet when spoken by tender lips in a loving tone. But a man who can admit he's wrong without feeling troubled—who can do so to another man or even a woman—is often seen as weak. Harry now faced this confession, which made him anxious. Furthermore, he had another difficult task ahead of him this evening—one that offered no redeeming pleasure. He needed to confess not just to Florence—where his confession might earn him some forgiveness—but also to Julia. That second confession would indeed be a tough one for him. However, that would have to wait until the next day. This evening, he had promised himself that he would go straight to Onslow Terrace; and he did so as soon as he arrived at his lodging. It was past six when he reached London, and it was not yet eight when, with a racing heart, he knocked on Mr. Burton's door.

I must take the reader back with me for a few minutes, in order that we may see after what fashion the letters from Clavering were received by the ladies in Onslow Terrace. On that day Mr. Burton had been required to go out of London by one of the early trains, and had not been in the house when the postman came. Nothing had been said between Cecilia and Florence as to their hopes or fears in regard to an answer from Clavering;—nothing at least since that conversation in which Florence had agreed to remain in London for yet a few days; but each of them was very nervous on the matter. Any answer, if sent at once from Clavering, would arrive on this morning; and therefore, when the well-known knock was heard, neither of them was able to maintain her calmness perfectly. But yet nothing was said, nor did either of them rise from her seat at the breakfast-table. Presently the girl came in with apparently a bundle of letters, which she was still sorting when she entered the room. There were two or three for Mr. Burton, two for Cecilia, and then two besides the registered packet for Florence. For that a receipt was needed, and as Florence had seen the address and recognized the writing, she was hardly able to give her signature. As soon as the maid was gone, Cecilia could keep her seat no longer. "I know those are from Clavering," she said, rising from her chair, and coming round to the side of the table. Florence instinctively swept the packet into her lap, and, leaning forward, covered the letters with her hands. "Oh, Florence, let us see them; let us see them at once. If we are to be happy let us know it." But Florence paused, still leaning over her treasures, and hardly daring to show her burning face. Even yet it might be that she was rejected. Then Cecilia went back to her seat, and simply looked at her sister with beseeching eyes. "I think I'll go upstairs," said Florence. "Are you afraid of me, Flo?" Cecilia answered reproachfully. "Let me see the outside of them." Then Florence brought them round the table, and put them into her sister's hands. "May I open this one from Mrs. Clavering?" Florence nodded her head. Then the seal was broken, and in one minute the two women were crying in each other's arms. "I was quite sure of it," said Cecilia, through her tears,—"perfectly sure. I never doubted it for a moment. How could you have talked of going to Stratton?" At last Florence got herself away up to the window, and gradually mustered courage to break the envelope of her lover's letter. It was not at once that she showed the postscript to Cecilia, nor at once that the packet was opened. That last ceremony she did perform in the solitude of her own room. But before the day was over the postscript had been shown, and the added trinket had been exhibited. "I remember it well," said Florence. "Mrs. Clavering wore it on her forehead when we dined at Lady Clavering's." Mrs. Burton in all this saw something of the gentle persuasion which the mother had used, but of that she said nothing. That he should be back again, and should have repented, was enough for her.

I need to take you back for a few minutes so we can see how the letters from Clavering were received by the women in Onslow Terrace. That day, Mr. Burton had to leave London on one of the early trains and wasn’t home when the postman arrived. Cecilia and Florence hadn't discussed their hopes or fears about a response from Clavering—not since Florence had agreed to stay in London for a few more days—but both were anxious about it. Any response from Clavering, if sent quickly, would arrive that morning; so when the familiar knock was heard, neither of them could remain completely calm. Still, no one spoke, and neither of them got up from the breakfast table. A moment later, the maid entered, sorting through a pile of letters. There were a few for Mr. Burton, two for Cecilia, and two for Florence, plus a registered packet that needed a signature. Having seen the address and recognized the handwriting, Florence could barely sign her name. Once the maid left, Cecilia couldn’t stay in her seat anymore. “I know those are from Clavering,” she said, getting up and moving around the table. Florence instinctively pulled the packet into her lap and leaned forward, covering the letters with her hands. “Oh, Florence, let’s see them; let’s see them right now. If we’re going to be happy, let’s know it.” But Florence hesitated, still hovering over her treasures, hardly daring to reveal her flushed face. She could still be rejected. Then Cecilia returned to her chair and looked at her sister with pleading eyes. “I think I’ll go upstairs,” said Florence. “Are you scared of me, Flo?” Cecilia asked, a bit reproachfully. “Let me see the outside of them.” Florence then brought them around the table and handed them to her sister. “Can I open this one from Mrs. Clavering?” Florence nodded. The seal was broken, and within a minute, the two women were in tears, embracing each other. “I knew it,” Cecilia said through her tears—“I was absolutely sure. I never doubted it for a second. How could you think about going to Stratton?” Eventually, Florence made her way to the window and gathered the courage to open her lover’s letter. It took her a while to show Cecilia the postscript, and she didn’t open the packet until she was alone in her room. But by the end of the day, she had shared the postscript and shown the additional trinket. “I remember it well,” Florence said. “Mrs. Clavering wore it on her forehead when we dined at Lady Clavering’s.” Mrs. Burton saw a bit of the gentle persuasion the mother had used, but she didn’t mention it. The fact that he would be back and had changed his mind was enough for her.

Mr. Burton was again absent when Harry Clavering knocked in person at the door; but on this occasion his absence had been specially arranged by him with a view to Harry's comfort. "He won't want to see me this evening," he had said. "Indeed you'll all get on a great deal better without me." He therefore had remained away from home, and, not being a club man, had dined most uncomfortably at an eating-house. "Are the ladies at home?" Harry asked, when the door was opened. Oh, yes; they were at home. There was no danger that they should be found out on such an occasion as this. The girl looked at him pleasantly, calling him by his name as she answered him, as though she too desired to show him that he had again been taken into favour,—into her favour as well as that of her mistress.

Mr. Burton was once again out when Harry Clavering knocked on the door in person; however, this time his absence had been intentionally arranged to make Harry more comfortable. "He won't want to see me tonight," he had said. "In fact, you'll all get along much better without me." So he stayed away from home and, not being a club member, ended up having an uncomfortable dinner at a diner. "Are the ladies home?" Harry asked when the door was opened. Oh, yes; they were at home. There was no chance they would be out during an occasion like this. The girl looked at him with a smile, using his name as she replied, as if she also wanted to show him that he was once again in favor—with her and her mistress.

He hardly knew what he was doing as he ran up the steps to the drawing-room. He was afraid of what was to come; but nevertheless he rushed at his fate as some young soldier rushes at the trench in which he feels that he may probably fall. So Harry Clavering hurried on, and before he had looked round upon the room which he had entered, found his fate with Florence on his bosom.

He barely knew what he was doing as he ran up the stairs to the living room. He was scared of what lay ahead; but still, he charged toward his destiny like a young soldier rushing into a trench, knowing he might likely fall. So, Harry Clavering hurried on, and before he even took in the room he had entered, he found his fate with Florence in his arms.

Alas, alas! I fear that justice was outraged in the welcome that Harry received on that evening. I have said that he would be called upon to own his sins, and so much, at least, should have been required of him. But he owned no sin! I have said that a certain degradation must attend him in that first interview after his reconciliation. Instead of this the hours that he spent that evening in Onslow Terrace were hours of one long ovation. He was, as it were, put upon a throne as a king who had returned from his conquest, and those two women did him honour, almost kneeling at his feet. Cecilia was almost as tender with him as Florence, pleading to her own false heart the fact of his illness as his excuse. There was something of the pallor of the sick-room left with him,—a slight tenuity in his hands and brightness in his eye which did him yeoman's service. Had he been quite robust, Cecilia might have felt that she could not justify to herself the peculiar softness of her words. After the first quarter of an hour he was supremely happy. His awkwardness had gone, and as he sat with his arm round Florence's waist, he found that the little pencil-case had again been attached to her chain, and as he looked down upon her he saw that the cheap brooch was again on her breast. It would have been pretty, could an observer have been there, to see the skill with which they both steered clear of any word or phrase which could be disagreeable to him. One might have thought that it would have been impossible to avoid all touch of a rebuke. The very fact that he was forgiven would seem to imply some fault that required pardon. But there was no hint at any fault. The tact of women excels the skill of men; and so perfect was the tact of these women that not a word was said which wounded Harry's ear. He had come again into their fold, and they were rejoiced and showed their joy. He who had gone astray had repented, and they were beautifully tender to the repentant sheep.

Alas, alas! I’m afraid that justice was ignored in the way Harry was welcomed that evening. I mentioned that he would be expected to acknowledge his wrongdoings, and at the very least, he should have been held accountable. But he admitted no wrongdoing! I pointed out that a certain level of shame should come with that first meeting after his reconciliation. Instead, the hours he spent that evening at Onslow Terrace were like one long celebration. It was as if he were placed on a throne like a king returning from a victory, and those two women honored him, almost kneeling at his feet. Cecilia was nearly as affectionate toward him as Florence, justifying to her own conflicted feelings his illness as an excuse. There was still some of the sick-room’s pallor about him—a slight thinness in his hands and a brightness in his eyes that served him well. Had he been completely healthy, Cecilia might have felt unable to defend the peculiar tenderness of her words. After the first fifteen minutes, he was incredibly happy. His awkwardness faded away, and as he sat with his arm around Florence’s waist, he noticed that the little pencil case was once more attached to her chain, and looking down at her, he saw that the cheap brooch was back on her dress. It would have been lovely if an observer had been there to witness how skillfully they both avoided any words or phrases that could upset him. One might think it would be impossible to steer clear of reprimand altogether. The mere fact that he was forgiven seemed to imply some mistake that needed amending. But there was no suggestion of any fault. The intuition of women surpasses that of men; and the sensitivity of these women was so flawless that not a single word was spoken that could hurt Harry's feelings. He had been welcomed back into their circle, and they were elated to show their joy. He who had gone astray had repented, and they were beautifully gentle with the returned sheep.

 

 

CHAPTER XLII.

RESTITUTION.

Harry stayed a little too long with his love,—a little longer at least than had been computed, and in consequence met Theodore Burton in the Crescent as he was leaving it. This meeting could hardly be made without something of pain, and perhaps it was well for Harry that he should have such an opportunity as this for getting over it quickly. But when he saw Mr. Burton under the bright gas-lamp he would very willingly have avoided him, had it been possible.

Harry stayed a bit too long with his love—at least a bit longer than expected—and as a result, he ran into Theodore Burton in the Crescent while leaving. This encounter couldn’t help but be somewhat painful, and maybe it was a good thing for Harry to have this chance to move on quickly. But when he spotted Mr. Burton under the bright gas lamp, he really would have preferred to dodge him if he could.

"Well, Harry?" said Burton, giving his hand to the repentant sheep.

"Well, Harry?" said Burton, extending his hand to the sorry sheep.

"How are you, Burton?" said Harry, trying to speak with an unconcerned voice. Then in answer to an inquiry as to his health, he told of his own illness, speaking of that confounded fever having made him very low. He intended no deceit, but he made more of the fever than was necessary.

"How's it going, Burton?" Harry asked, trying to sound casual. When asked about his health, he shared details about his own illness, mentioning that annoying fever had really brought him down. He wasn't trying to lie, but he exaggerated the fever more than he needed to.

"When will you come back to the shop?" Burton asked. It must be remembered that though the brother could not refuse to welcome back to his home his sister's lover, still he thought that the engagement was a misfortune. He did not believe in Harry as a man of business, and had almost rejoiced when Florence had been so nearly quit of him. And now there was a taint of sarcasm in his voice as he asked as to Harry's return to the chambers in the Adelphi.

"When are you coming back to the shop?" Burton asked. It's important to note that even though he couldn't refuse to welcome his sister's boyfriend back home, he still considered the engagement a bad thing. He didn't see Harry as someone who could succeed in business, and he had almost been pleased when Florence had come so close to breaking things off with him. Now, there was a hint of sarcasm in his voice when he inquired about Harry's return to the apartments in the Adelphi.

"I can hardly quite say as yet," said Harry, still pleading his illness. "They were very much against my coming up to London so soon. Indeed I should not have done it had I not felt so very—very anxious to see Florence. I don't know, Burton, whether I ought to say anything to you about that."

"I can hardly say for sure yet," Harry said, still blaming his illness. "They really didn't want me coming up to London this soon. Honestly, I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't felt so incredibly—very anxious to see Florence. I don't know, Burton, if I should mention anything to you about that."

"I suppose you have said what you had to say to the women?"

"I guess you told the women what you needed to?"

"Oh, yes. I think they understand me completely, and I hope that I understand them."

"Oh, yes. I think they totally get me, and I hope that I get them too."

"In that case I don't know that you need say anything to me. Come to the Adelphi as soon as you can; that's all. I never think myself that a man becomes a bit stronger after an illness by remaining idle." Then Harry passed on, and felt that he had escaped easily in that interview.

"In that case, I don’t think you need to say anything to me. Just come to the Adelphi as soon as you can; that’s all. I never believe that a man gets any stronger after an illness by staying idle." Then Harry moved on and felt that he had gotten off easy in that meeting.

But as he walked home he was compelled to think of the step which he must next take. When he had last seen Lady Ongar he had left her with a promise that Florence was to be deserted for her sake. As yet that promise would by her be supposed to be binding. Indeed he had thought it to be binding on himself till he had found himself under his mother's influence at the parsonage. During his last few weeks in London he had endured an agony of doubt; but in his vacillations the pendulum had always veered more strongly towards Bolton Street than to Onslow Crescent. Now the swinging of the pendulum had ceased altogether. From henceforth Bolton Street must be forbidden ground to him, and the sheepfold in Onslow Crescent must be his home till he should have established a small peculiar fold for himself. But, as yet, he had still before him the task of communicating his final decision to the lady in Bolton Street. As he walked home he determined that he had better do so in the first place by letter, and so eager was he as to the propriety of doing this at once, that on his return to his lodgings he sat down, and wrote the letter before he went to his bed. It was not very easily written. Here, at any rate, he had to make those confessions of which I have before spoken;—confessions which it may be less difficult to make with pen and ink than with spoken words, but which when so made are more degrading. The word that is written is a thing capable of permanent life, and lives frequently to the confusion of its parent. A man should make his confessions always by word of mouth if it be possible. Whether such a course would have been possible to Harry Clavering may be doubtful. It might have been that in a personal meeting the necessary confession would not have got itself adequately spoken. Thinking, perhaps, of this he wrote his letter as follows on that night.
 

But as he walked home, he had no choice but to think about what he needed to do next. The last time he saw Lady Ongar, he promised her that he would leave Florence for her. For now, she would assume that promise was still valid. In fact, he had believed it was still true until his mother influenced him at the parsonage. During his last few weeks in London, he struggled with intense doubt; however, he always leaned more towards Bolton Street than Onslow Crescent. Now, the uncertainty was gone. From this point on, Bolton Street had to be off-limits for him, and he would make his home in Onslow Crescent until he could establish a small, unique space for himself. But first, he needed to communicate his final decision to the woman in Bolton Street. While walking home, he decided that it would be best to do it by letter, and he was so eager to do this immediately that when he got back to his place, he sat down and wrote the letter before going to bed. It wasn’t easy to write. Here, he had to make the confessions I mentioned before—confessions that might be easier to write down than to say out loud, but are even more humiliating when written. A written word can last forever and often comes back to haunt the person who wrote it. A man should make his confessions verbally if he can. Whether that would have been possible for Harry Clavering is questionable. It's possible that in a face-to-face meeting, he wouldn't have managed to express the necessary confession properly. Considering this, he wrote his letter that night as follows.

Bloomsbury Square, July, 186—.
 

Bloomsbury Square, July, 186—.

The date was easily written, but how was he to go on after that? In what form of affection or indifference was he to address her whom he had at that last meeting called his own, his dearest Julia? He got out of his difficulty in the way common to ladies and gentlemen under such stress, and did not address her by any name or any epithet. The date he allowed to remain, and then he went away at once to the matter of his subject.
 

The date was simple to write down, but how was he supposed to continue from there? What kind of feelings—whether affection or indifference—was he supposed to express to her, the woman he had just called his own, his dearest Julia? He navigated his dilemma in the usual way people do in such situations, avoiding any name or title for her. He left the date as it was and immediately moved on to the main point of his message.

I feel that I owe it you at once to tell you what has been my history during the last few weeks. I came up from Clavering to-day, and have since that been with Mrs. and Miss Burton. Immediately on my return from them I sit down to write you.
 

I want to update you on what’s been happening with me lately. I traveled up from Clavering today, and since then, I’ve been with Mrs. and Miss Burton. As soon as I got back from seeing them, I sat down to write you.

After having said so much, Harry probably felt that the rest of his letter would be surplusage. Those few words would tell her all that it was required that she should know. But courtesy demanded that he should say more, and he went on with his confession.
 

After saying so much, Harry probably felt that the rest of his letter was unnecessary. Those few words would convey everything she needed to know. But politeness required him to say more, so he continued with his confession.

You know that I became engaged to Miss Burton soon after your own marriage. I feel now that I should have told you this when we first met; but yet, had I done so, it would have seemed as though I told it with a special object. I don't know whether I make myself understood in this. I can only hope that I do so.
 

You know I got engaged to Miss Burton shortly after you got married. Looking back, I realize I should have mentioned it when we first met, but honestly, if I had, it might have sounded like I was bringing it up for a specific reason. I'm not sure if I’m making sense here. I can only hope that I am.

Understood! Of course she understood it all. She required no blundering explanation from him to assist her intelligence.
 

Got it! Of course she got it all. She didn't need any clumsy explanation from him to help her understand.

I wish now that I had mentioned it. It would have been better for both of us. I should have been saved much pain; and you, perhaps, some uneasiness.

I wish I had brought this up sooner. It would have been better for both of us. I could have avoided a lot of pain, and you might have felt a little less anxious.

I was called down to Clavering a few weeks ago, about some business in the family, and then became ill,—so that I was confined to my bed instead of returning to town. Had it not been for this I should not have left you so long in suspense,—that is if there has been suspense. For myself, I have to own that I have been very weak,—worse than weak, I fear you will think. I do not know whether your old regard for me will prompt you to make any excuse for me, but I am well sure that I can make none for myself which will not have suggested itself to you, without my urging it. If you choose to think that I have been heartless,—or rather, if you are able so to think of me, no words of mine, written or spoken now, will remove that impression from your mind.

A few weeks ago, I was called down to Clavering for some family issues, and then I got sick, so I had to stay in bed instead of heading back to the city. If it weren't for that, I wouldn’t have made you wait so long—if you've actually been waiting at all. Honestly, I’ve felt pretty weak—worse than weak, and I’m afraid you might think poorly of me. I don’t know if your past feelings for me will allow you to forgive me, but I know I can’t come up with an excuse that you haven't already thought of. If you want to believe I’ve been heartless—or if you can see me that way—then nothing I say now, whether in writing or spoken, will change that perspective for you.

I believe that I need write nothing further. You will understand from what I have said all that I should have to say were I to refer at length to that which has passed between us. All that is over now, and it only remains for me to express a hope that you may be happy. Whether we shall ever see each other again who shall say?—but if we do I trust that we may not meet as enemies. May God bless you here and hereafter.

I think I've said everything I need to. You’ll take from what I’ve shared all that I would want to say if I went into detail about what has happened between us. That’s all in the past now, and all I can do is hope that you find happiness. Who knows if we’ll ever meet again? But if we do, I hope it won’t be as enemies. May God bless you now and always.

Harry Clavering.
 

Harry Clavering.

When the letter was finished Harry sat for a while by his open window looking at the moon, over the chimney-pots of his square, and thinking of his career in life as it had hitherto been fulfilled. The great promise of his earlier days had not been kept. His plight in the world was now poor enough, though his hopes had been so high! He was engaged to be married, but had no income on which to marry. He had narrowly escaped great wealth. Ah!—It was hard for him to think of that without a regret; but he did strive so to think of it. Though he told himself that it would have been evil for him to have depended on money which had been procured by the very act which had been to him an injury,—to have dressed himself in the feathers which had been plucked from Lord Ongar's wings,—it was hard for him to think of all that he had missed, and rejoice thoroughly that he had missed it. But he told himself that he so rejoiced, and endeavoured to be glad that he had not soiled his hands with riches which never would have belonged to the woman he had loved had she not earned them by being false to him. Early on the following morning he sent off his letter, and then, putting himself into a cab, bowled down to Onslow Crescent. The sheepfold now was very pleasant to him when the head shepherd was away, and so much gratification it was natural that he should allow himself.

When Harry finished the letter, he sat by his open window for a while, looking at the moon over the chimney pots in his square and reflecting on his life so far. The great promise of his earlier days hadn't come true. His situation in the world was now quite bleak, even though his hopes had been so high! He was engaged to get married but had no income to support that. He had narrowly missed out on great wealth. Ah!—It was tough for him to think about that without feeling regret, but he tried hard not to. He told himself it would have been wrong to rely on money that came from something that had hurt him—to have dressed himself in the feathers taken from Lord Ongar’s wings—but it was still hard for him to think of everything he had missed and fully rejoice that he had missed it. Still, he convinced himself that he was happy about it and tried to feel grateful that he hadn’t tainted his hands with riches that would never have belonged to the woman he loved if she hadn't earned them by being unfaithful to him. Early the next morning, he sent off his letter, and then he took a cab to Onslow Crescent. The sheepfold was quite pleasant to him when the head shepherd was away, and it felt natural for him to allow himself that little bit of satisfaction.

That evening, when he came from his club, he found a note from Lady Ongar. It was very short, and the blood rushed to his face as he felt ashamed at seeing with how much apparent ease she had answered him. He had written with difficulty, and had written awkwardly. But there was nothing awkward in her words.
 

That evening, when he returned from his club, he found a note from Lady Ongar. It was very brief, and he felt a rush of blood to his face, ashamed at how effortlessly she had responded to him. He had struggled to write his message and had done so clumsily. But her words were anything but awkward.

Dear Harry,—We are quits now. I do not know why we should ever meet as enemies. I shall never feel myself to be an enemy of yours. I think it would be well that we should see each other, and if you have no objection to seeing me, I will be at home any evening that you may call. Indeed I am at home always in the evening. Surely, Harry, there can be no reason why we should not meet. You need not fear that there will be danger in it.

Dear Harry,—We're even now. I don’t understand why we should meet as opponents. I’ll never think of you as my enemy. I believe it would be beneficial for us to get together, and if you’re okay with that, I’ll be home any evening you choose to stop by. In fact, I'm always home in the evenings. Surely, Harry, there’s no reason we can’t meet. You shouldn’t be concerned that it will be risky.

Will you give my compliments to Miss Florence Burton, with my best wishes for her happiness? Your Mrs. Burton I have seen,—as you may have heard, and I congratulate you on your friend.

Could you please send my regards to Miss Florence Burton, along with my best wishes for her happiness? I've met your Mrs. Burton, as you may know, and I want to congratulate you on your friend.

Yours always, J. O.
 

Yours always, J. O.

The writing of this letter seemed to have been easy enough, and certainly there was nothing in it that was awkward; but I think that the writer had suffered more in the writing than Harry had done in producing his longer epistle. But she had known how to hide her suffering, and had used a tone which told no tale of her wounds. We are quits now, she had said, and she had repeated the words over and over again to herself as she walked up and down her room. Yes! they were quits now,—if the reflection of that fact could do her any good. She had ill-treated him in her early days; but, as she had told herself so often, she had served him rather than injured him by that ill-treatment. She had been false to him; but her falsehood had preserved him from a lot which could not have been fortunate. With such a clog as she would have been round his neck,—with such a wife, without a shilling of fortune, how could he have risen in the world? No! Though she had deceived him, she had served him. Then,—after that,—had come the tragedy of her life, the terrible days in thinking of which she still shuddered, the days of her husband and Sophie Gordeloup,—that terrible deathbed, those attacks upon her honour, misery upon misery, as to which she never now spoke a word to any one, and as to which she was resolved that she never would speak again. She had sold herself for money, and had got the price; but the punishment of her offence had been very heavy. And now, in these latter days, she had thought to compensate the man she had loved for the treachery with which she had used him. That treachery had been serviceable to him, but not the less should the compensation be very rich. And she would love him too. Ah, yes; she had always loved him! He should have it all now,—everything, if only he would consent to forget that terrible episode in her life, as she would strive to forget it. All that should remain to remind them of Lord Ongar would be the wealth that should henceforth belong to Harry Clavering. Such had been her dream, and Harry had come to her with words of love which made it seem to be a reality. He had spoken to her words of love which he was now forced to withdraw, and the dream was dissipated. It was not to be allowed to her to escape her penalty so easily as that! As for him, they were now quits. That being the case, there could be no reason why they should quarrel.

Writing this letter seemed pretty straightforward, and there was nothing awkward about it; but I believe the writer suffered more while writing it than Harry did when he created his longer letter. However, she had learned to hide her pain and used a tone that revealed nothing of her struggles. "We’re even now," she told herself repeatedly as she paced her room. Yes! They were even now—if that realization could bring her any comfort. She had treated him poorly in her younger days; but, as she often reminded herself, she had been more of a help than a hindrance by treating him that way. She had deceived him, but her deceit had spared him from a fate that wouldn’t have been good for him. With someone like her as his wife—without a penny to her name—how could he have succeeded? No! Even though she had tricked him, she had been of service to him. Then came the tragedy of her life, those horrific days that still made her shudder, the days involving her husband and Sophie Gordeloup— that awful deathbed scene, the attacks on her reputation, endless miseries she never spoke about and was determined never to discuss again. She had sold herself for money and received what she paid for, but the consequences of her actions had been severe. And now, in these later times, she hoped to make up for the betrayal she had inflicted on the man she loved. That betrayal had benefited him, but that didn’t mean her atonement shouldn’t be generous. And she would love him too. Oh yes; she had always loved him! He would have it all now—everything, if only he would agree to forget that terrible chapter of her life, just as she would try to forget it. The only reminder of Lord Ongar would be the wealth that would now belong to Harry Clavering. That had been her dream, and Harry had come to her with declarations of love that made it all feel possible. He had spoken those loving words that he now had to take back, and the dream had vanished. It seemed she couldn’t escape her consequences so easily! As for him, they were even now. Since that was the case, there was no reason for them to fight.

But what now should she do with her wealth, and especially how should she act in respect to that place down in the country? Though she had learned to hate Ongar Park during her solitary visit there, she had still looked forward to the pleasure the property might give her, when she should be able to bestow it upon Harry Clavering. But that had been part of her dream, and the dream was now over. Through it all she had been conscious that she might hardly dare to hope that the end of her punishment should come so soon,—and now she knew that it was not to come. As far as she could see, there was no end to the punishment in prospect for her. From her first meeting with Harry Clavering on the platform of the railway station his presence, or her thoughts of him, had sufficed to give some brightness to her life,—had enabled her to support the friendship of Sophie Gordeloup, and also to support her solitude when poor Sophie had been banished. But now she was left without any resource. As she sat alone, meditating on all this, she endeavoured to console herself with the reflection that, after all, she was the one whom Harry loved,—whom Harry would have chosen, had he been free to choose. But the comfort to be derived from that was very poor. Yes; he had loved her once,—nay, perhaps he loved her still. But when that love was her own she had rejected it. She had rejected it, simply declaring to him, to her friends, and to the world at large, that she preferred to be rich. She had her reward, and, bowing her head upon her hands, she acknowledged that the punishment was deserved.

But what should she do now with her wealth, and especially how should she deal with that place down in the country? Even though she had learned to hate Ongar Park during her lonely visit there, she had still looked forward to the enjoyment the property might bring her when she could give it to Harry Clavering. But that had been part of her dream, and the dream was now over. Throughout all of this, she had known she could hardly dare to hope that the end of her punishment would come so soon—and now she realized it wasn’t coming at all. From what she could see, there was no end to the punishment in sight for her. From the first time she met Harry Clavering on the platform at the train station, his presence, or even just her thoughts of him, had added some brightness to her life—helped her maintain her friendship with Sophie Gordeloup and cope with her solitude when poor Sophie had been sent away. But now she was left with no options. As she sat alone, reflecting on all this, she tried to comfort herself with the thought that, after all, she was the one Harry loved—she was the one Harry would have chosen if he had been free to choose. But the comfort from that was very slight. Yes; he had loved her once—maybe he still did. But when that love was offered to her, she had turned it down. She had rejected it, simply stating to him, to her friends, and to the world that she preferred to be wealthy. She had her reward, and, resting her head in her hands, she acknowledged that the punishment was deserved.

Her first step after writing her note to Harry was to send for Mr. Turnbull, her lawyer. She had expected to see Harry on the evening of the day on which she had written, but instead of that she received a note from him in which he said that he would come to her before long. Mr. Turnbull was more instant in obeying her commands, and was with her on the morning after he received her injunction. He was almost a perfect stranger to her, having only seen her once and that for a few moments after her return to England. Her marriage settlements had been prepared for her by Sir Hugh's attorney; but during her sojourn in Florence it had become necessary that she should have some one in London to look after her own affairs, and Mr. Turnbull had been recommended to her by lawyers employed by her husband. He was a prudent, sensible man, who recognized it to be his imperative interest to look after his client's interest. And he had done his duty by Lady Ongar in that trying time immediately after her return. An offer had then been made by the Courton family to give Julia her income without opposition if she would surrender Ongar Park. To this she had made objections with indignation, and Mr. Turnbull, though he had at first thought that she would be wise to comply with the terms proposed, had done her work for her with satisfactory expedition. Since those days she had not seen him, but now she had summoned him, and he was with her in Bolton Street.

Her first step after writing her note to Harry was to call her lawyer, Mr. Turnbull. She had expected to see Harry that evening, but instead, she received a note saying he would come by soon. Mr. Turnbull responded quickly to her request and met her the morning after he got her message. He was almost a complete stranger to her, having only met briefly after her return to England. Her marriage settlements had been handled by Sir Hugh's lawyer, but while she was in Florence, she needed someone in London to manage her affairs, and Mr. Turnbull was recommended by her husband's lawyers. He was a practical and sensible man who recognized it was essential for him to look after his client's interests. He had done his duty by Lady Ongar during that challenging time right after her return. The Courton family had offered to give Julia her income without any fuss if she would give up Ongar Park. She had reacted with anger to that, and though Mr. Turnbull initially thought it might be wise for her to agree to the terms, he completed her work quickly and satisfactorily. Since then, she hadn't seen him, but now she had called for him, and he was with her in Bolton Street.

"I want to speak to you, Mr. Turnbull," she said, "about that place down in Surrey. I don't like it."

"I want to talk to you, Mr. Turnbull," she said, "about that place down in Surrey. I don't like it."

"Not like Ongar Park?" he said. "I have always heard that it is so charming."

"Not like Ongar Park?" he said. "I've always heard it's really charming."

"It is not charming to me. It is a sort of property that I don't want, and I mean to give it up."

"It doesn't appeal to me. It's a kind of possession that I don't want, and I'm planning to let it go."

"Lord Ongar's uncles would buy your interest in it, I have no doubt."

"Lord Ongar's uncles would definitely buy your stake in it."

"Exactly. They have sent to me, offering to do so. My brother-in-law, Sir Hugh Clavering, called on me with a message from them saying so. I thought that he was very foolish to come, and so I told him. Such things should be done by one's lawyers. Don't you think so, Mr. Turnbull?" Mr. Turnbull smiled as he declared that, of course, he, being a lawyer, was of that opinion. "I am afraid they will have thought me uncivil," continued Julia, "as I spoke rather brusquely to Sir Hugh Clavering. I am not inclined to take any steps through Sir Hugh Clavering; but I do not know that I have any reason to be angry with the little lord's family."

"Exactly. They reached out to me, offering to help. My brother-in-law, Sir Hugh Clavering, came by with a message from them saying just that. I thought it was pretty silly for him to come, and I told him so. Those things should be handled by your lawyers. Don't you agree, Mr. Turnbull?" Mr. Turnbull smiled and said that, of course, being a lawyer, he shared that view. "I'm afraid they might think I was rude," Julia continued, "since I spoke rather bluntly to Sir Hugh Clavering. I’m not really eager to go through Sir Hugh Clavering, but I don’t think I have any reason to be upset with the little lord’s family."

"Really, Lady Ongar, I think not. When your ladyship returned there was some opposition thought of for a while, but I really do not think it was their fault."

"Honestly, Lady Ongar, I don’t think so. When you returned, there was some pushback considered for a bit, but I genuinely don’t believe it was their fault."

"No; it was not their fault."

"No, it wasn't their fault."

"That was my feeling at the time; it was indeed."

"That was how I felt at the time; it really was."

"It was the fault of Lord Ongar,—of my husband. As regards all the Courtons I have no word of complaint to make. It is not to be expected,—it is not desirable that they and I should be friends. It is impossible, after what has passed, that there should be such friendship. But they have never injured me, and I wish to oblige them. Had Ongar Park suited me I should, doubtless, have kept it; but it does not suit me, and they are welcome to have it back again."

"It was Lord Ongar's fault—my husband's fault. I have no complaints about the Courtons. It's not expected—or even desirable—that we should be friends. Given what has happened, friendship isn't possible. But they have never done me wrong, and I want to be accommodating. If Ongar Park had suited me, I would have kept it; but it doesn't, so they're welcome to have it back."

"Has a price been named, Lady Ongar?"

"Has a price been stated, Lady Ongar?"

"No price need be named. There is to be no question of a price. Lord Ongar's mother is welcome to the place,—or rather to such interest as I have in it."

"No price needs to be mentioned. There’s no discussion about a price. Lord Ongar's mother is welcome to the place—or more accurately, to whatever interest I have in it."

"And to pay a rent?" suggested Mr. Turnbull.

"And to pay rent?" suggested Mr. Turnbull.

"To pay no rent! Nothing would induce me to let the place, or to sell my right in it. I will have no bargain about it. But as nothing also will induce me to live there, I am not such a dog in the manger as to wish to keep it. If you will have the kindness to see Mr. Courton's lawyer and to make arrangements about it."

"Not paying rent! There's nothing that could convince me to rent out the place or sell my share of it. I'm not interested in making any deals. But since I definitely don’t want to live there either, I’m not the kind of person to hold on to it just to keep others from having it. If you could please meet with Mr. Courton's lawyer and sort things out, I would appreciate it."

"But, Lady Ongar; what you call your right in the estate is worth over twenty thousand pounds. It is indeed. You could borrow twenty thousand pounds on the security of it to-morrow."

"But, Lady Ongar; what you call your right to the estate is worth over twenty thousand pounds. It really is. You could borrow twenty thousand pounds against it tomorrow."

"But I don't want to borrow twenty thousand pounds."

"But I don't want to take a loan for twenty thousand pounds."

"No, no; exactly. Of course you don't. But I point out that fact to show the value. You would be making a present of that sum of money to people who do not want it,—who have no claim upon you. I really don't see how they could take it."

"No, no; that’s right. Of course you don’t. But I mention this to highlight its importance. You’d be giving away that amount of money to people who don’t need it—who have no right to it from you. I honestly don’t understand how they could accept it."

"Mrs. Courton wishes to have the place very much."

"Mrs. Courton really wants to have the place."

"But, my lady, she has never thought of getting it without paying for it. Lady Ongar, I really cannot advise you to take any such step as that. Indeed, I cannot. I should be wrong, as your lawyer, if I did not point out to you that such a proceeding would be quite romantic,—quite so; what the world would call Quixotic. People don't expect such things as that. They don't, indeed."

"But, my lady, she has never considered getting it without paying for it. Lady Ongar, I honestly can't advise you to take that kind of step. Really, I can't. As your lawyer, I would be wrong not to point out that such an action would be very romantic—absolutely; what people would call Quixotic. Folks don’t expect things like that. They really don’t."

"People don't often have such reasons as I have," said Lady Ongar. Mr. Turnbull sat silent for a while, looking as though he were unhappy. The proposition made to him was one which, as a lawyer, he felt to be very distasteful to him. He knew that his client had no male friends in whom she confided, and he felt that the world would blame him if he allowed this lady to part with her property in the way she had suggested. "You will find that I am in earnest," she continued, smiling. "And you may as well give way to my vagaries with a good grace."

"People don’t often have the reasons I do," said Lady Ongar. Mr. Turnbull sat silently for a while, looking like he was unhappy. The suggestion made to him was one that, as a lawyer, he found very unpleasant. He knew that his client had no male friends she confided in, and he felt that the world would judge him if he allowed this lady to give up her property in the way she proposed. "You’ll see that I’m serious," she continued, smiling. "And you might as well indulge my whims with a good attitude."

"They would not take it, Lady Ongar."

"They won't accept it, Lady Ongar."

"At any rate we can try them. If you will make them understand that I don't at all want the place, and that it will go to rack and ruin because there is no one to live there, I am sure they will take it."

"Anyway, we can give it a shot. If you can make them understand that I really don’t want the place and that it’s going to fall apart since no one will be living there, I’m sure they’ll accept it."

Then Mr. Turnbull again sat silent and unhappy, thinking with what words he might best bring forward his last and strongest argument against this rash proceeding.

Then Mr. Turnbull sat quietly again, feeling unhappy, as he pondered the best words to present his final and strongest argument against this reckless action.

"Lady Ongar," he said, "in your peculiar position there are double reasons why you should not act in this way."

"Lady Ongar," he said, "given your unique situation, there are two reasons why you shouldn't behave like this."

"What do you mean, Mr. Turnbull? What is my peculiar position?"

"What do you mean, Mr. Turnbull? What is my unusual situation?"

"The world will say that you have restored Ongar Park because you were afraid to keep it. Indeed, Lady Ongar, you had better let it remain as it is."

"The world will say that you restored Ongar Park because you were afraid to keep it. Truly, Lady Ongar, you should probably just let it stay as it is."

"I care nothing for what the world says," she exclaimed, rising quickly from her chair;—"nothing; nothing!"

"I don't care at all about what the world says," she said, quickly getting up from her chair;—"nothing; nothing!"

"You should really hold by your rights; you should, indeed. Who can possibly say what other interests may be concerned? You may marry, and live for the next fifty years, and have a family. It is my duty, Lady Ongar, to point out these things to you."

"You really need to stand up for your rights; you definitely should. Who can say what other interests might be at stake? You could marry, live for the next fifty years, and have a family. It’s my responsibility, Lady Ongar, to bring these things to your attention."

"I am sure you are quite right, Mr. Turnbull," she said, struggling to maintain a quiet demeanour. "You, of course, are only doing your duty. But whether I marry or whether I remain as I am, I shall give up this place. And as for what the world, as you call it, may say, I will not deny that I cared much for that on my immediate return. What people said then made me very unhappy. But I care nothing for it now. I have established my rights, and that has been sufficient. To me it seems that the world, as you call it, has been civil enough in its usage of me lately. It is only of those who should have been my friends that I have a right to complain. If you will please to do this thing for me, I will be obliged to you."

"I’m sure you’re absolutely right, Mr. Turnbull," she said, trying to keep a calm demeanor. "You’re just doing your job, of course. But whether I get married or stay as I am, I’m leaving this place. And as for what the world, as you put it, might say, I won’t deny that I cared a lot about that when I first came back. What people said back then really upset me. But I don’t care about it anymore. I’ve claimed my rights, and that’s enough for me. It seems to me that the world, as you call it, has treated me fairly lately. It’s only those who should have been my friends that I have a right to complain about. If you could please do this for me, I would appreciate it."

"If you are quite determined about it—"

"If you’re really set on it—"

"I am quite determined. What is the use of the place to me? I never shall go there. What is the use even of the money that comes to me? I have no purpose for it. I have nothing to do with it."

"I am really determined. What does that place mean to me? I’m never going there. What’s the point of the money that comes to me? I have no use for it. It has nothing to do with me."

There was something in her tone as she said this which well filled him with pity.

There was something in her tone as she said this that filled him with pity.

"You should remember," he said, "how short a time it is since you became a widow. Things will be different with you soon."

"You should remember," he said, "how little time has passed since you became a widow. Things will change for you soon."

"My clothes will be different, if you mean that," she answered; "but I do not know that there will be any other change in me. But I am wrong to trouble you with all this. If you will let Mr. Courton's lawyer know, with my compliments to Mrs. Courton, that I have heard that she would like to have the place, and that I do not want it, I will be obliged to you." Mr. Turnbull having by this time perceived that she was quite in earnest, took his leave, having promised to do her bidding.

"My clothes will be different, if that’s what you mean," she replied; "but I don’t think there will be any other change in me. But I shouldn’t bother you with all this. If you could let Mr. Courton's lawyer know, with my regards to Mrs. Courton, that I’ve heard she wants the place and that I don’t want it, I would appreciate it." Mr. Turnbull, realizing she was completely serious, took his leave after promising to do as she requested.

In this interview she had told her lawyer only a part of the plan which was now running in her head. As for giving up Ongar Park, she took to herself no merit for that. The place had been odious to her ever since she had endeavoured to establish herself there and had found that the clergyman's wife would not speak to her,—that even her own housekeeper would hardly condescend to hold converse with her. She felt that she would be a dog in the manger to keep the place in her own possession. But she had thoughts beyond this,—resolutions only as yet half-formed as to a wider surrender. She had disgraced herself, ruined herself, robbed herself of all happiness by the marriage she had made. Her misery had not been simply the misery of that lord's lifetime. As might have been expected, that was soon over. But an enduring wretchedness had come after that from which she saw no prospect of escape. What was to be her future life, left as she was and would be, in desolation? If she were to give it all up,—all the wealth that had been so ill-gotten,—might there not then be some hope of comfort for her?

In this interview, she only shared part of the plan running through her head with her lawyer. She didn’t take any pride in giving up Ongar Park. The place had felt awful to her ever since she tried to settle there and found that the clergyman's wife wouldn’t talk to her—and even her own housekeeper barely deigned to speak with her. She felt it would be selfish to keep the place for herself. But she had thoughts beyond that—resolutions that were only half-formed about a broader abandonment. She had embarrassed herself, ruined her life, robbed herself of all happiness through the marriage she had made. Her misery hadn’t just been the sadness of that lord’s lifetime, which, as expected, was over quickly. But an ongoing sadness had come afterward from which she saw no way to escape. What would her future life look like, left as she was and would be, in loneliness? If she gave it all up—all the wealth that had come through deceit—could there be some hope for comfort in her life?

She had been willing enough to keep Lord Ongar's money, and use it for the purposes of her own comfort, while she had still hoped that comfort might come from it. The remembrance of all that she had to give had been very pleasant to her, as long as she had hoped that Harry Clavering would receive it at her hands. She had not at once felt that the fruit had all turned to ashes. But now,—now that Harry was gone from her,—now that she had no friend left to her whom she could hope to make happy by her munificence,—the very knowledge of her wealth was a burden to her. And as she thought of her riches in these first days of her desertion, as she had indeed been thinking since Cecilia Burton had been with her, she came to understand that she was degraded by their acquisition. She had done that which had been unpardonably bad, and she felt like Judas when he stood with the price of his treachery in his hand. He had given up his money, and would not she do as much? There had been a moment in which she had nearly declared all her purpose to the lawyer, but she was held back by the feeling that she ought to make her plans certain before she communicated them to him.

She had been more than willing to accept Lord Ongar's money and use it for her own comfort while she still hoped that comfort might come from it. The thought of everything she had to offer had been very pleasing to her as long as she believed that Harry Clavering would receive it from her. At first, she didn’t realize that all that promise had turned to dust. But now—now that Harry was gone—now that she had no friend left whom she could hope to make happy with her generosity—the very knowledge of her wealth felt like a burden. As she reflected on her riches in these early days of her abandonment, as she had been thinking since Cecilia Burton had been with her, she began to understand that she was diminished by their gain. She had done something unforgivably wrong, and she felt like Judas holding the price of his betrayal. He had given up his money; shouldn’t she do the same? There was a moment when she almost shared her intentions with the lawyer, but she held back, feeling she needed to solidify her plans before revealing them to him.

She must live. She could not go out and hang herself as Judas had done. And then there was her title and rank, of which she did not know whether it was within her power to divest herself. She sorely felt the want of some one from whom in her present need she might ask counsel; of some friend to whom she could trust to tell her in what way she might now best atone for the evil she had done. Plans ran through her head which were thrown aside almost as soon as made, because she saw that they were impracticable. She even longed in these days for her sister's aid, though of old she had thought but little of Hermy as a counsellor. She had no friend whom she might ask;—unless she might still ask Harry Clavering.

She has to survive. She can’t go out and hang herself like Judas did. And then there’s her title and status, and she doesn’t know if she can just give them up. She really wishes she had someone to turn to for advice in her current situation; a friend she could trust to tell her how to make up for the harm she’s caused. Ideas popped into her head but were discarded almost immediately because they seemed impossible. During these days, she even found herself wishing for her sister’s support, even though she used to think little of Hermy as a mentor. She didn’t have any friends she could reach out to—unless she could still ask Harry Clavering.

If she did not keep it all might she still keep something,—enough for decent life,—and yet comfort herself with the feeling that she had expiated her sin? And what would be said of her when she had made this great surrender? Would not the world laugh at her instead of praising her,—that world as to which she had assured Mr. Turnbull that she did not care what its verdict about her might be? She had many doubts. Ah! why had not Harry Clavering remained true to her? But her punishment had come upon her with all its severity, and she acknowledged to herself now that it was not to be avoided.

If she didn’t hold onto everything, could she still have something—enough for a decent life—and comfort herself with the idea that she had atoned for her sin? And what would people say about her after making this huge sacrifice? Wouldn't the world just laugh at her instead of praising her—this world to which she had told Mr. Turnbull she didn’t care about its opinion of her? She had so many doubts. Oh! why hadn’t Harry Clavering stayed loyal to her? But her punishment had hit her with all its harshness, and she admitted to herself now that it couldn’t be escaped.

 

 

CHAPTER XLIII.

LADY ONGAR'S REVENGE.

At last came the night which Harry had fixed for his visit to Bolton Street. He had looked forward certainly with no pleasure to the interview, and now that the time for it had come, was disposed to think that Lady Ongar had been unwise in asking for it. But he had promised that he would go, and there was no possible escape.

AAt last, the night that Harry had planned for his visit to Bolton Street arrived. He had definitely not looked forward to the meeting with any excitement, and now that it was time, he felt that Lady Ongar had made a mistake in requesting it. But he had promised to go, and there was no way out.

He dined that evening in Onslow Crescent, where he was now again established with all his old comfort. He had again gone up to the children's nursery with Cecilia, had kissed them all in their cots, and made himself quite at home in the establishment. It was with them there as though there had been no dreadful dream about Lady Ongar. It was so altogether with Cecilia and Florence, and even Mr. Burton was allowing himself to be brought round to a charitable view of Harry's character. Harry on this day had gone to the chambers in the Adelphi for an hour, and walking away with Theodore Burton had declared his intention of working like a horse. "If you were to say like a man, it would perhaps be better," said Burton. "I must leave you to say that," answered Harry; "for the present I will content myself with the horse." Burton was willing to hope, and allowed himself once more to fall into his old pleasant way of talking about the business as though there were no other subject under the sun so full of manifold interest. He was very keen at the present moment about Metropolitan railways, and was ridiculing the folly of those who feared that the railway projectors were going too fast. "But we shall never get any thanks," he said. "When the thing has been done, and thanks are our due, people will look upon all our work so much as a matter of course that it will never occur to them to think that they owe us anything. They will have forgotten all their cautions, and will take what they get as though it were simply their due. Nothing astonishes me so much as the fear people feel before a thing is done when I join it with their want of surprise or admiration afterwards." In this way even Theodore Burton had resumed his terms of intimacy with Harry Clavering.

He had dinner that evening on Onslow Crescent, where he was comfortably settled in once again. He had gone back up to the children's nursery with Cecilia, kissed them all in their cribs, and made himself feel right at home there. It felt just like before, as if the terrible dream about Lady Ongar had never happened. The same went for Cecilia and Florence, and even Mr. Burton was starting to look at Harry's character in a more charitable light. Earlier that day, Harry had gone to the chambers in the Adelphi for an hour, and while walking away with Theodore Burton, he declared his intention to work hard. "If you said 'like a man,' that might be better," said Burton. "I'll let you say that," Harry replied; "for now, I'll stick with 'like a horse.'" Burton was feeling hopeful and allowed himself to slip back into his old enjoyable way of discussing the business as if there was no other topic on Earth that was so interesting. He was particularly excited about Metropolitan railways at the moment and was mocking those who worried that the railway developers were moving too quickly. "But we’ll never receive any gratitude," he said. "Once it’s done, and the thanks are due, people will treat all our work as if it were just expected, never thinking they owe us anything. They’ll have forgotten all their concerns and will take what they get as if it’s their right. Nothing surprises me more than the fear people have before something is completed when I compare it to their lack of surprise or admiration afterward." In this way, even Theodore Burton had resumed his close relationship with Harry Clavering.

Harry had told both Cecilia and Florence of his intended visit to Bolton Street, and they had all become very confidential on the subject. In most such cases we may suppose that a man does not say much to one woman of the love which another woman has acknowledged for himself. Nor was Harry Clavering at all disposed to make any such boast. But in this case, Lady Ongar herself had told everything to Mrs. Burton. She had declared her passion, and had declared also her intention of making Harry her husband if he would take her. Everything was known, and there was no possibility of sparing Lady Ongar's name.

Harry had informed both Cecilia and Florence about his planned visit to Bolton Street, and they had all become quite open about it. In most cases, we can assume that a man doesn’t share much with one woman about the feelings another woman has for him. Harry Clavering wasn’t at all inclined to brag about it. However, in this situation, Lady Ongar herself had shared everything with Mrs. Burton. She had confessed her feelings and also expressed her intention to marry Harry if he was willing. Everything was out in the open, and there was no way to avoid mentioning Lady Ongar’s name.

"If I had been her I would not have asked for such a meeting," Cecilia said. The three were at this time sitting together, for Mr. Burton rarely joined them in their conversation.

"If I were her, I wouldn't have asked for a meeting like that," Cecilia said. The three were sitting together at that time, since Mr. Burton seldom joined in their conversations.

"I don't know," said Florence. "I do not see why she and Harry should not remain as friends."

"I don't know," Florence said. "I don't see why she and Harry can't stay friends."

"They might be friends without meeting now," said Cecilia.

"They could be friends without ever meeting now," Cecilia said.

"Hardly. If the awkwardness were not got over at once it would never be got over. I almost think she is right, though if I were her I should long to have it over." That was Florence's judgment in the matter. Harry sat between them, like a sheep as he was, very meekly,—not without some enjoyment of his sheepdom, but still feeling that he was a sheep. At half-past eight he started up, having already been told that a cab was waiting for him at the door. He pressed Cecilia's hand as he went, indicating his feeling that he had before him an affair of some magnitude, and then of course had a word or two to say to Florence in private on the landing. Oh, those delicious private words, the need for which comes so often during those short halcyon days of one's lifetime! They were so pleasant that Harry would fain have returned to repeat them after he was seated in his cab; but the inevitable wheels carried him onwards with cruel velocity, and he was in Bolton Street before the minutes had sufficed for him to collect his thoughts.

"Hardly. If the awkwardness isn’t dealt with right away, it will never be resolved. I almost think she’s right, though if I were in her shoes, I would really want it to be over." That was Florence’s take on the situation. Harry sat between them, feeling like a sheep, very meekly—not without some enjoyment in his submissiveness, but still aware that he was a sheep. At half-past eight, he suddenly got up, having already been told that a cab was waiting for him at the door. He squeezed Cecilia’s hand as he left, expressing his sense that he had a significant matter ahead of him, and then of course had a word or two to share with Florence in private on the landing. Oh, those delightful private words, so often needed during those brief golden moments in life! They were so enjoyable that Harry wished he could go back and repeat them after he settled into his cab; but the relentless wheels carried him away at cruel speed, and he found himself in Bolton Street before he had time to gather his thoughts.

Harry sat between them, like a sheep       as he was, very meekly.
Harry sat between them, like the timid person he was, very quietly.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

Lady Ongar, when he entered the room, was sitting in her accustomed chair, near a little work-table which she always used, and did not rise to meet him. It was a pretty chair, soft and easy, made with a back for lounging, but with no arms to impede the circles of a lady's hoop. Harry knew the chair well and had spoken of its graceful comfort in some of his visits to Bolton Street. She was seated there when he entered; and though he was not sufficiently experienced in the secrets of feminine attire to know at once that she had dressed herself with care, he did perceive that she was very charming, not only by force of her own beauty, but by the aid also of her dress. And yet she was in deep mourning,—in the deepest mourning; nor was there anything about her of which complaint might fairly be made by those who do complain on such subjects. Her dress was high round her neck, and the cap on her head was indisputably a widow's cap; but enough of her brown hair was to be seen to tell of its rich loveliness; and the black dress was so made as to show the full perfection of her form; and with it all there was that graceful feminine brightness that care and money can always give, and which will not come without care and money. It might be well, she had thought, to surrender her income, and become poor and dowdy hereafter, but there could be no reason why Harry Clavering should not be made to know all that he had lost.

Lady Ongar was sitting in her usual chair near her little work table when he walked into the room, and she didn’t get up to greet him. It was a lovely chair, soft and comfortable, designed for lounging but without arms to interfere with a lady's hoop skirt. Harry was familiar with the chair and had commented on its graceful comfort during some of his visits to Bolton Street. She was already seated when he arrived; although he wasn't experienced enough in the details of women's fashion to realize right away that she had dressed thoughtfully, he could see that she looked very charming, not only due to her own beauty but also because of her outfit. Despite being in deep mourning, she did so in a way that wouldn’t attract criticism from those who often complain about such things. Her dress was high around her neck, and the cap on her head was clearly a widow’s cap; still, enough of her brown hair showed to reveal its rich beauty. The black dress was tailored to showcase the perfect lines of her figure, and with it all, there was that elegant feminine glow that attention and resources can provide, which doesn’t come without effort and expense. She had decided it might be wise to give up her income and live more simply in the future, but there was no reason for Harry Clavering not to see all that he had lost.

"Well, Harry," she said, as he stepped up to her and took her offered hand. "I am glad that you have come that I may congratulate you. Better late than never; eh, Harry?"

"Well, Harry," she said as he walked up to her and took her hand. "I'm glad you came so I can congratulate you. Better late than never, right, Harry?"

How was he to answer her when she spoke to him in this strain? "I hope it is not too late," he said, hardly knowing what the words were which were coming from his mouth.

How was he supposed to respond when she talked to him like this? "I hope it's not too late," he said, barely aware of the words coming out of his mouth.

"Nay; that is for you to say. I can do it heartily, Harry, if you mean that. And why not? Why should I not wish you happy? I have always liked you,—have always wished for your happiness. You believe that I am sincere when I congratulate you;—do you not?"

"Nah; that's for you to decide. I can say it genuinely, Harry, if that's what you mean. And why not? Why shouldn't I want you to be happy? I've always liked you — have always hoped for your happiness. You believe that I'm being sincere when I congratulate you, right?"

"Oh, yes; you are always sincere."

"Oh, definitely; you're always authentic."

"I have always been so to you. As to any sincerity beyond that we need say nothing now. I have always been your good friend,—to the best of my ability. Ah, Harry; you do not know how much I have thought of your welfare; how much I do think of it. But never mind that. Tell me something now of this Florence Burton of yours. Is she tall?" I believe that Lady Ongar, when she asked this question, knew well that Florence was short of stature.

"I've always been like that towards you. We don’t need to discuss any sincerity beyond that right now. I've always been your good friend—to the best of my ability. Ah, Harry; you have no idea how much I’ve thought about your well-being; how much I still do. But never mind that. Tell me something about this Florence Burton of yours. Is she tall?" I believe that Lady Ongar knew very well when she asked this question that Florence was actually short.

"No; she is not tall," said Harry.

"No, she's not tall," Harry said.

"What,—a little beauty? Upon the whole I think I agree with your taste. The most lovely women that I have ever seen have been small, bright, and perfect in their proportions. It is very rare that a tall woman has a perfect figure." Julia's own figure was quite perfect. "Do you remember Constance Vane? Nothing ever exceeded her beauty." Now Constance Vane,—she at least who had in those days been Constance Vane, but who now was the stout mother of two or three children,—had been a waxen doll of a girl, whom Harry had known, but had neither liked nor admired. But she was highly bred, and belonged to the cream of English fashion; she had possessed a complexion as pure in its tints as are the interior leaves of a blush rose,—and she had never had a thought in her head, and hardly ever a word on her lips. She and Florence Burton were as poles asunder in their differences. Harry felt this at once, and had an indistinct notion that Lady Ongar was as well aware of the fact as was he himself. "She is not a bit like Constance Vane," he said.

"What—a little beauty? Overall, I think I agree with your taste. The most gorgeous women I've ever seen have been small, bright, and perfectly proportioned. It's very rare for a tall woman to have a flawless figure." Julia's own figure was quite perfect. "Do you remember Constance Vane? Nothing ever surpassed her beauty." Now Constance Vane—at least the Constance Vane from those days, but who was now the stout mother of two or three children—had once been a doll-like girl whom Harry had known but never liked or admired. But she was well-bred and part of the elite of English society; she had a complexion as pure as the inside of a blush rose—yet she had never had a thought in her head and hardly ever a word on her lips. She and Florence Burton were completely different from each other. Harry sensed this immediately and had a vague idea that Lady Ongar was just as aware of this as he was. "She is nothing like Constance Vane," he said.

"Then what is she like? If she is more beautiful than what Miss Vane used to be, she must be lovely indeed."

"Then what is she like? If she’s more beautiful than Miss Vane used to be, she must be truly stunning."

"She has no pretensions of that kind," said Harry, almost sulkily.

"She doesn’t have any pretensions like that," Harry said, almost sulkily.

"I have heard that she was so very beautiful!" Lady Ongar had never heard a word about Florence's beauty;—not a word. She knew nothing personally of Florence beyond what Mrs. Burton had told her. But who will not forgive her the little deceit that was necessary to her little revenge?

"I've heard she's incredibly beautiful!" Lady Ongar had never heard anything about Florence's beauty; not a single word. She knew nothing about Florence personally beyond what Mrs. Burton had told her. But who can blame her for the small lie she told for her tiny act of revenge?

"I don't know how to describe her," said Harry. "I hope the time may soon come when you will see her, and be able to judge for yourself."

"I don't know how to describe her," Harry said. "I hope the time will come soon when you can see her and judge for yourself."

"I hope so too. It shall not be my fault if I do not like her."

"I hope so too. It won't be my fault if I don't like her."

"I do not think you can fail to like her. She is very clever, and that will go further with you than mere beauty. Not but what I think her very,—very pretty."

"I don’t think you can help but like her. She is really smart, and that will mean more to you than just looks. Not that I don't think she's very—very pretty."

"Ah,—I understand. She reads a great deal, and that sort of thing. Yes; that is very nice. But I shouldn't have thought that that would have taken you. You used not to care much for talent and learning,—not in women I mean."

"Ah, I get it. She reads a lot and all that. Yeah, that's great. But I wouldn't have guessed that would attract you. You never really cared much for talent and education—at least not in women, I mean."

"I don't know about that," said Harry, looking very foolish.

"I’m not so sure about that," Harry said, looking quite foolish.

"But a contrast is what you men always like. Of course I ought not to say that, but you will know of what I am thinking. A clever, highly-educated woman like Miss Burton will be a much better companion to you than I could have been. You see I am very frank, Harry." She wished to make him talk freely about himself, his future days, and his past days, while he was simply anxious to say on these subjects as little as possible. Poor woman! The excitement of having a passion which she might indulge was over with her,—at any rate for the present. She had played her game and had lost wofully; but before she retired altogether from the gaming-table she could not keep herself from longing for a last throw of the dice.

"But you guys always like a contrast. I know I shouldn’t say that, but you understand what I mean. A smart, well-educated woman like Miss Burton would be a much better match for you than I ever could be. You see, I’m very honest, Harry." She wanted him to talk openly about himself, his future, and his past, while he just wanted to say as little as possible about those things. Poor woman! The thrill of having a passion she could indulge in was gone for her—at least for now. She had played her hand and lost badly; but before she left the game for good, she couldn't help but wish for one last roll of the dice.

"These things, I fear, go very much by chance," said Harry.

"These things, I’m afraid, mostly happen by chance," said Harry.

"You do not mean me to suppose that you are taking Miss Burton by chance. That would be as uncomplimentary to her as to yourself."

"You can't expect me to think that you're just taking Miss Burton by chance. That would be insulting to both her and yourself."

"Chance, at any rate, has been very good to me in this instance."

"Luck, in any case, has treated me really well in this situation."

"Of that I am sure. Do not suppose that I am doubting that. It is not only the paradise that you have gained, but the pandemonium that you have escaped!" Then she laughed slightly, but the laughter was uneasy, and made her angry with herself. She had especially determined to be at ease during this meeting, and was conscious that any falling off in that respect on her part would put into his hands the power which she was desirous of exercising.

"Of that, I’m certain. Don’t think that I have any doubts about it. It’s not just the paradise you’ve gained, but also the chaos you’ve avoided!” Then she laughed a bit, but the laughter felt uncomfortable and made her frustrated with herself. She had particularly decided to stay relaxed during this meeting and was aware that any slip on her part would give him the control she wanted to maintain.

"You are determined to rebuke me, I see," said he. "If you choose to do so, I am prepared to bear it. My defence, if I have a defence, is one that I cannot use."

"You’re set on criticizing me, I can see," he said. "If that’s what you want to do, I’m ready to take it. My defense, if I even have one, is something I can’t actually use."

"And what would be your defence?"

"And what would be your defense?"

"I have said that I cannot use it."

"I've said that I can't use it."

"As if I did not understand it all! What you mean to say is this,—that when your good stars sent you in the way of Florence Burton, you had been ill-treated by her who would have made your pandemonium for you, and that she therefore,—she who came first and behaved so badly—can have no right to find fault with you in that you have obeyed your good stars and done so well for yourself. That is what you call your defence. It would be perfect, Harry,—perfect, if you had only whispered to me a word of Miss Burton when I first saw you after my return home. It is odd to me that you should not have written to me and told me when I was abroad with my husband. It would have comforted me to have known that the wound which I had given had been cured;—that is, if there was a wound."

"As if I didn’t get it at all! What you’re saying is this: when fate brought you to Florence Burton, you had been mistreated by someone who could have created chaos for you, and because of that—she who came first and acted so poorly—has no right to criticize you for following your destiny and doing well for yourself. That’s your defense, right? It would be perfect, Harry—perfect—if you had just whispered a word about Miss Burton when I first saw you after I got back home. It’s strange to me that you didn’t write to me and let me know while I was abroad with my husband. It would have been comforting to know the wound I caused had healed; that is, if there even was a wound."

"You know that there was a wound."

"You know there was an injury."

"At any rate, it was not mortal. But when are such wounds mortal? When are they more than skin-deep?"

"Anyway, it wasn’t life-threatening. But when are such wounds really life-threatening? When are they more than just skin-deep?"

"I can say nothing as to that now."

"I can't say anything about that right now."

"No, Harry; of course you can say nothing. Why should you be made to say anything? You are fortunate and happy, and have all that you want. I have nothing that I want."

"No, Harry; of course you can't say anything. Why should you have to say anything? You’re lucky and happy, and you have everything you want. I have nothing that I want."

There was a reality in the tone of sorrow in which this was spoken which melted him at once;—and the more so in that there was so much in her grief which could not but be flattering to his vanity. "Do not say that, Lady Ongar," he exclaimed.

There was a real sadness in the way she spoke that touched him immediately; especially since her grief held elements that were flattering to his ego. "Don't say that, Lady Ongar," he exclaimed.

"But I do say it. What have I got in the world that is worth having? My possessions are ever so many thousands a year,—and a damaged name."

"But I do say it. What do I have in this world that's worth having? My possessions amount to thousands a year—and a tarnished reputation."

"I deny that. I deny it altogether. I do not think that there is one who knows of your story who believes ill of you."

"I completely deny that. I don’t think anyone who knows your story thinks badly of you."

"I could tell you of one, Harry, who thinks very ill of me;—nay, of two; and they are both in this room. Do you remember how you used to teach me that terribly conceited bit of Latin,—Nil conscire sibi? Do you suppose that I can boast that I never grow pale as I think of my own fault? I am thinking of it always, and my heart is ever becoming paler and paler. And as to the treatment of others;—I wish I could make you know what I suffered when I was fool enough to go to that place in Surrey. The coachman who drives me no doubt thinks that I poisoned my husband, and the servant who let you in just now supposes me to be an abandoned woman because you are here."

"I could tell you about one person, Harry, who thinks very poorly of me; actually, there are two, and they’re both in this room. Do you remember how you used to teach me that super arrogant bit of Latin—Nil conscire sibi? Do you really think I can say I never go pale when I think about my own mistakes? I’m always thinking about it, and my heart is getting paler and paler. And regarding how I treat others—I wish I could make you understand what I went through when I was foolish enough to go to that place in Surrey. The driver who brings me here probably thinks I poisoned my husband, and the servant who just let you in assumes I’m a lost cause just because you’re here."

"You will be angry with me, perhaps, if I say that these feelings are morbid and will die away. They show the weakness which has come from the ill-usage you have suffered."

"You might be upset with me if I say that these feelings are unhealthy and will fade away. They reveal the weakness that has resulted from the mistreatment you've endured."

"You are right in part, no doubt. I shall become hardened to it all, and shall fall into some endurable mode of life in time. But I can look forward to nothing. What future have I? Was there ever any one so utterly friendless as I am? Your kind cousin has done that for me;—and yet he came here to me the other day, smiling and talking as though he were sure that I should be delighted by his condescension. I do not think that he will ever come again."

"You’re partly right, no doubt. I’ll get used to it all and eventually settle into some bearable way of living. But I can’t see anything ahead of me. What kind of future do I have? Has anyone ever been so completely alone as I am? Your nice cousin has made it that way for me; yet he came to see me the other day, smiling and chatting as if he was certain I’d be thrilled by his kindness. I honestly don’t think he’ll ever come back."

"I did not know you had seen him."

"I didn't know you had seen him."

"Yes; I saw him;—but I did not find much relief from his visit. We won't mind that, however. We can talk about something better than Hugh Clavering during the few minutes that we have together;—can we not? And so Miss Burton is very learned and very clever?"

"Yeah, I saw him;—but I didn't really feel much better after his visit. Let's not dwell on that, though. We can chat about something more interesting than Hugh Clavering during the short time we have together;—can’t we? So, Miss Burton is very knowledgeable and very smart?"

"I did not quite say that."

"I didn't say that exactly."

"But I know she is. What a comfort that will be to you! I am not clever, and I never should have become learned. Oh, dear! I had but one merit, Harry;—I was fond of you."

"But I know she is. What a relief that will be for you! I'm not smart, and I never should have gotten educated. Oh, dear! I had only one good thing about me, Harry;—I cared about you."

"And how did you show it?" He did not speak these words, because he would not triumph over her, nor was he willing to express that regret on his own part which these words would have implied;—but it was impossible for him to avoid a thought of them. He remained silent, therefore, taking up some toy from the table into his hands, as though that would occupy his attention.

"And how did you show it?" He didn’t say this out loud because he didn’t want to triumph over her, nor was he willing to admit any regret on his part that those words would suggest;—but it was hard for him not to think about them. So, he stayed silent, picking up a toy from the table as if that would distract him.

"But what a fool I am to talk of it;—am I not? And I am worse than a fool. I was thinking of you when I stood up in church to be married;—thinking of that offer of your little savings. I used to think of you at every harsh word that I endured;—of your modes of life when I sat through those terrible nights by that poor creature's bed;—of you when I knew that the last day was coming. I thought of you always, Harry, when I counted up my gains. I never count them up now. Ah, how I thought of you when I came to this house in the carriage which you had provided for me, when I had left you at the station almost without speaking a word to you! I should have been more gracious had I not had you in my thoughts throughout my whole journey home from Florence. And after that I had some comfort in believing that the price of my shame might make you rich without shame. Oh, Harry, I have been disappointed! You will never understand what I felt when first that evil woman told me of Miss Burton."

"But what a fool I am to talk about this;—am I not? And I'm worse than a fool. I was thinking of you when I stood up in church to get married;—thinking about your offer of your little savings. I used to think of you with every harsh word I had to endure;—of your way of life when I spent those terrible nights by that poor woman's bed;—of you when I knew the end was near. I thought of you all the time, Harry, when I added up my gains. I don’t count them anymore. Ah, how I thought of you when I arrived at this house in the carriage you had sent for me, after leaving you at the station with hardly a word exchanged! I should have been more gracious if I hadn’t had you in my mind throughout the entire journey home from Florence. Later on, I found some comfort in believing that the price of my shame might make you wealthy without shame. Oh, Harry, I have been let down! You will never understand how I felt when that wicked woman first told me about Miss Burton."

"Oh, Julia, what am I to say?"

"Oh, Julia, what should I say?"

"You can say nothing; but I wonder that you had not told me."

"You can’t say anything; but I’m surprised you didn’t tell me."

"How could I tell you? Would it not have seemed that I was vain enough to have thought of putting you on your guard?"

"How could I tell you? Wouldn't it seem that I was too full of myself to think of warning you?"

"And why not? But never mind. Do not suppose that I am rebuking you. As I said in my letter, we are quits now, and there is no place for scolding on either side. We are quits now; but I am punished and you are rewarded."

"And why not? But never mind. Don't think that I'm criticizing you. As I mentioned in my letter, we're even now, and there's no room for scolding on either side. We're even now; but I’m the one suffering and you’re the one getting rewarded."

Of course he could not answer this. Of course he was hard pressed for words. Of course he could neither acknowledge that he had been rewarded, nor assert that a share of the punishment of which she spoke had fallen upon him also. This was the revenge with which she had intended to attack him. That she should think that he had in truth been punished and not rewarded, was very natural. Had he been less quick in forgetting her after her marriage, he would have had his reward without any punishment. If such were her thoughts, who shall quarrel with her on that account?

Of course he couldn't answer this. Of course he struggled to find the right words. Of course he could neither admit that he had been rewarded nor claim that part of the punishment she mentioned had applied to him as well. This was the revenge she had aimed at him. It was completely understandable that she believed he had actually been punished and not rewarded. If he had been a little slower to forget her after her marriage, he would have received his reward without any punishment. If those were her thoughts, who could blame her for feeling that way?

"I have been very frank with you," she continued. "Indeed, why should I not be so? People talk of a lady's secret, but my secret has been no secret from you? That I was made to tell it under,—under,—what I will call an error,—was your fault; and it is that that has made us quits."

"I’ve been totally honest with you," she went on. "Really, why shouldn’t I be? People mention a lady’s secret, but my secret hasn’t been a secret to you at all, has it? The fact that I had to reveal it under—under—what I’ll call a misunderstanding was your doing; and that's what has settled the score between us."

"I know that I have behaved badly to you."

"I know that I've treated you poorly."

"But then unfortunately you know also that I had deserved bad treatment. Well; we will say no more about it. I have been very candid with you, but then I have injured no one by my candour. You have not said a word to me in reply; but then your tongue is tied by your duty to Miss Burton,—your duty and your love together, of course. It is all as it should be, and now I will have done. When are you to be married, Harry?"

"But unfortunately, you also know that I deserved poor treatment. Well, let's not talk about it anymore. I've been very honest with you, but I haven't hurt anyone with my honesty. You haven't said a word back to me; but your duty to Miss Burton—your duty and your love, of course—has left you speechless. It's all as it should be, and now I'll be done. When are you getting married, Harry?"

"No time has been fixed. I am a very poor man, you know."

"No time has been set. I'm really broke, you know."

"Alas, alas,—yes. When mischief is done, how badly all the things turn out. You are poor and I am rich, and yet we cannot help each other."

"Unfortunately, yes. When trouble strikes, everything goes wrong. You are broke, and I have money, but we still can’t help one another."

"I fear not."

"I'm not afraid."

"Unless I could adopt Miss Burton, and be a sort of mother to her. You would shrink, however, from any such guardianship on my part. But you are clever, Harry, and can work when you please, and will make your way. If Miss Burton keeps you waiting now by any prudent fear on her part, I shall not think so well of her as I am inclined to do."

"Unless I could take in Miss Burton and be like a mother to her. However, you would probably refuse to let me take on that role. But you’re smart, Harry, and you can succeed when you really try. If Miss Burton is making you wait out of some cautious fear, I won’t think as highly of her as I’m currently inclined to."

"The Burtons are all prudent people."

"The Burtons are all sensible people."

"Tell her, from me, with my love,—not to be too prudent. I thought to be prudent, and see what has come of it."

"Tell her, with my love, not to be too cautious. I tried to be careful, and look at what that's led to."

"I will tell her what you say."

"I'll tell her what you said."

"Do, please; and, Harry, look here. Will she accept a little present from me? You, at any rate, for my sake, will ask her to do so. Give her this,—it is only a trifle,"—and she put her hand on a small jeweller's box, which was close to her arm upon the table, "and tell her,—of course she knows all our story, Harry?"

"Please do, Harry, listen. Will she accept a small gift from me? You will ask her to, for my sake. Give her this—it's just a little thing,"—and she pointed to a small jewelry box that was next to her arm on the table, "and tell her—she knows our whole story, right, Harry?"

"Yes; she knows it all."

"Yeah; she knows everything."

"Tell her that she whom you have rejected sends it with her kindest wishes to her whom you have taken."

"Tell her that the one you rejected sends this with her best wishes to the one you have chosen."

"No; I will not tell her that."

"No, I won't tell her that."

"Why not? It is all true. I have not poisoned the little ring, as the ladies would have done some centuries since. They were grander then than we are now, and perhaps hardly worse, though more cruel. You will bid her take it,—will you not?"

"Why not? It's all true. I haven't poisoned the little ring, like the ladies would have done centuries ago. They were more impressive then than we are now, and maybe not much worse, though more ruthless. You'll ask her to take it, won't you?"

"I am sure she will take it without bidding on my part."

"I’m sure she’ll take it without me having to ask."

"And tell her not to write me any thanks. She and I will both understand that that had better be omitted. If, when I shall see her at some future time as your wife, it shall be on her finger, I shall know that I am thanked." Then Harry rose to go. "I did not mean by that to turn you out, but perhaps it may be as well. I have no more to say,—and as for you, you cannot but wish that the penance should be over." Then he pressed her hand, and with some muttered farewell, bade her adieu. Again she did not rise from her chair, but nodding at him with a sweet smile, let him go without another word.

"And tell her not to write me any thank-you notes. We both know that would be better left unsaid. If, when I see her someday as your wife, I notice it on her finger, I’ll understand I’ve been thanked." Then Harry got up to leave. "I didn’t mean to rush you out, but maybe it’s for the best. I have nothing more to say, and you must be hoping that this penance is over." He then squeezed her hand, and with a few murmured goodbyes, he said farewell. She didn’t get up from her chair but nodded at him with a warm smile, letting him leave without another word.

 

 

CHAPTER XLIV.

SHEWING WHAT HAPPENED OFF HELIGOLAND.

During the six weeks after this, Harry Clavering settled down to his work at the chambers in the Adelphi with exemplary diligence. Florence, having remained a fortnight in town after Harry's return to the sheepfold, and having accepted Lady Ongar's present,—not without a long and anxious consultation with her sister-in-law on the subject,—had returned in fully restored happiness to Stratton. Mrs. Burton was at Ramsgate with the children, and Mr. Burton was in Russia with reference to a line of railway which was being projected from Moscow to Astracan. It was now September, and Harry, in his letters home, declared that he was the only person left in London. It was hard upon him,—much harder than it was upon the Wallikers and other young men whom fate retained in town, for Harry was a man given to shooting,—a man accustomed to pass the autumnal months in a country house. And then, if things had chanced to go one way instead of another, he would have had his own shooting down at Ongar Park with his own friends,—admiring him at his heels; or if not so this year, he would have been shooting elsewhere with the prospect of these rich joys for years to come. As it was, he had promised to stick to the shop, and was sticking to it manfully. Nor do I think that he allowed his mind to revert to those privileges which might have been his at all more frequently than any of my readers would have done in his place. He was sticking to the shop, and though he greatly disliked the hot desolation of London in those days, being absolutely afraid to frequent his club at such a period of the year,—and though he hated Walliker mortally,—he was fully resolved to go on with his work. Who could tell what might be his fate? Perhaps in another ten years he might be carrying that Russian railway on through the deserts of Siberia. Then there came to him suddenly tidings which disturbed all his resolutions, and changed the whole current of his life.

During the six weeks that followed, Harry Clavering focused on his work at the chambers in the Adelphi with impressive dedication. Florence, after spending two weeks in town following Harry's return to his rural life and accepting Lady Ongar's gift—after a long and anxious discussion with her sister-in-law about it—returned to Stratton feeling completely happy again. Mrs. Burton was at Ramsgate with the kids, and Mr. Burton was in Russia working on a proposed railway line from Moscow to Astracan. It was now September, and in his letters home, Harry claimed that he was the only person left in London. It was tough for him—much harder than it was for the Wallikers and other young men who remained in the city, because Harry was someone who loved shooting—someone used to spending the autumn months in a country house. If things had turned out differently, he would have been shooting at Ongar Park with friends admiring him at his heels; or if not this year, he would be shooting elsewhere with the expectation of enjoying those moments for years to come. Instead, he had promised to stay committed to his work, and he was doing so with determination. I don’t think he let himself dwell on the privileges he might have had any more often than any of my readers would have in his situation. He was committed to his work, and although he strongly disliked the hot emptiness of London during that time, feeling completely reluctant to visit his club during such a season—and even though he had a deep-seated dislike for Walliker—he was fully resolved to continue with his tasks. Who knew what his future might hold? Perhaps in another ten years, he would be overseeing that Russian railway through the Siberian deserts. Then, he suddenly received news that disrupted all his plans and changed the direction of his life completely.

At first there came a telegram to him from the country, desiring him to go down at once to Clavering, but not giving him any reason. Added to the message were these words,—"We are all well at the parsonage;"—words evidently added in thoughtfulness. But before he had left the office there came to him there a young man from the bank at which his cousin Hugh kept his account, telling him the tidings to which the telegram no doubt referred. Jack Stuart's boat had been lost, and his two cousins had gone to their graves beneath the sea! The master of the boat, and Stuart himself, with a boy, had been saved. The other sailors whom they had with them, and the ship's steward, had perished with the Claverings. Stuart, it seemed, had caused tidings of the accident to be sent to the rector of Clavering and to Sir Hugh's bankers. At the bank they had ascertained that their late customer's cousin was in town, and their messenger had thereupon been sent, first to Bloomsbury Square, and from thence to the Adelphi.

At first, he received a telegram from the countryside asking him to go to Clavering immediately, but it didn’t explain why. Along with the message were these words: "We are all well at the parsonage." Those words clearly showed that someone was being considerate. Before he could leave the office, a young man from the bank where his cousin Hugh had his account arrived with news that the telegram was likely about. Jack Stuart's boat had sunk, and his two cousins had drowned! The boat's captain, Stuart himself, and a boy had survived. The other sailors they had on board and the ship's steward had perished along with the Claverings. Apparently, Stuart had arranged for news of the accident to be sent to the rector of Clavering and to Sir Hugh's bankers. At the bank, they found out that their former customer’s cousin was in town, so they sent their messenger to Bloomsbury Square first and then to the Adelphi.

Harry had never loved his cousins. The elder he had greatly disliked, and the younger he would have disliked had he not despised him. But not the less on that account was he inexpressibly shocked when he first heard what had happened. The lad said that there could, as he imagined, be no mistake. The message had come, as he believed, from Holland, but of that he was not certain. There could, however, be no doubt about the fact. It distinctly stated that both brothers had perished. Harry had known when he received the message from home, that no train would take him till three in the afternoon, and had therefore remained at the office; but he could not remain now. His head was confused, and he could hardly bring himself to think how this matter would affect himself. When he attempted to explain his absence to an old serious clerk there, he spoke of his own return to the office as certain. He should be back, he supposed, in a week at the furthest. He was thinking then of his promises to Theodore Burton, and had not begun to realize the fact that his whole destiny in life would be changed. He said something, with a long face, of the terrible misfortune which had occurred, but gave no hint that that misfortune would be important in its consequences to himself. It was not till he had reached his lodgings in Bloomsbury Square that he remembered that his own father was now the baronet, and that he was his father's heir. And then for a moment he thought about the property. He believed that it was entailed, but even of that he was not certain. But if it were unentailed, to whom could his cousin have left it? He endeavoured, however, to expel such thoughts from his mind, as though there was something ungenerous in entertaining them. He tried to think of the widow, but even in doing that he could not tell himself that there was much ground for genuine sorrow. No wife had ever had less joy from her husband's society than Lady Clavering had had from that of Sir Hugh. There was no child to mourn the loss,—no brother, no unmarried sister. Sir Hugh had had friends,—as friendship goes with such men; but Harry could not but doubt whether among them all there would be one who would feel anything like true grief for his loss. And it was the same with Archie. Who in the world would miss Archie Clavering? What man or woman would find the world to be less bright because Archie Clavering was sleeping beneath the waves? Some score of men at his club would talk of poor Clavvy for a few days,—would do so without any pretence at the tenderness of sorrow; and then even of Archie's memory there would be an end. Thinking of all this as he was carried down to Clavering, Harry could not but acknowledge that the loss to the world had not been great; but, even while telling himself this, he would not allow himself to take comfort in the prospect of his heirship. Once, perhaps, he did speculate how Florence should bear her honours as Lady Clavering; but this idea he swept away from his thoughts as quickly as he was able.

Harry had never liked his cousins. He really disliked the older one and would have disliked the younger if he didn't actually despise him. Still, he was completely shocked when he first heard what had happened. The guy said there could be no mistake. The message had come, he believed, from Holland, but he wasn’t sure about that. There was no doubt, though, about the fact: it clearly stated that both brothers had died. When he got the message from home, Harry knew that no train would take him until three in the afternoon, so he had stayed at the office. But he couldn’t stay there now. His mind was racing, and he could barely think about how this would affect him. When he tried to explain his absence to a serious old clerk, he spoke as if returning to the office was a sure thing. He figured he’d be back in a week at the latest. He was thinking about his commitments to Theodore Burton and hadn’t realized that his entire life was about to change. He mentioned, with a serious face, the terrible misfortune that had occurred but didn’t let on that it would have significant consequences for him. It wasn’t until he arrived at his place in Bloomsbury Square that he remembered his father was now the baronet, making him his father's heir. For a moment, he thought about the property. He believed it was entailed, but he wasn't sure. If it wasn't, who could his cousin have left it to? He tried to push those thoughts away, as if it was wrong to even consider them. He attempted to think about the widow, but even then, he couldn't convince himself that there was much reason for real sorrow. No wife had ever had less joy from her husband than Lady Clavering had from Sir Hugh. There were no children to mourn, no siblings. Sir Hugh had friends—just the type of friendship that comes with men like him—but Harry doubted there would be anyone among them who would feel any true grief over his passing. The same went for Archie. Who would miss Archie Clavering? What man or woman would find life less bright because Archie Clavering was gone? A handful of men at his club would talk about poor Clavvy for a few days—without any pretense of being genuinely sad—and then even Archie's memory would fade away. As he was driven down to Clavering, Harry couldn’t help but realize that the loss to the world hadn’t been significant; yet, even while telling himself this, he wouldn’t let himself take comfort in the idea of inheriting. At one point, he might have wondered how Florence would handle her new role as Lady Clavering, but he pushed that thought away as quickly as he could.

The tidings had reached the parsonage very late on the previous night; so late that the rector had been disturbed in his bed to receive them. It was his duty to make known to Lady Clavering the fact that she was a widow, but this he could not do till the next morning. But there was little sleep that night for him or for his wife! He knew well enough that the property was entailed. He felt with sufficient strength what it was to become a baronet at a sudden blow, and to become also the owner of the whole Clavering property. He was not slow to think of the removal to the great house, of the altered prospects of his son, and of the mode of life which would be fitting for himself in future. Before the morning came he had meditated who should be the future rector of Clavering, and had made some calculations as to the expediency of resuming his hunting. Not that he was a heartless man,—or that he rejoiced at what had happened. But a man's ideas of generosity change as he advances in age, and the rector was old enough to tell himself boldly that this thing that had happened could not be to him a cause of much grief. He had never loved his cousins, or pretended to love them. His cousin's wife he did love, after a fashion, but in speaking to his own wife of the way in which this tragedy would affect Hermione, he did not scruple to speak of her widowhood as a period of coming happiness.

The news had reached the parsonage very late the night before; so late that the rector had been woken from his sleep to hear it. It was his responsibility to inform Lady Clavering that she was now a widow, but he couldn’t do that until the next morning. That night, neither he nor his wife got much sleep! He understood well that the estate was entailed. He felt clearly what it meant to suddenly become a baronet and to own the entire Clavering property. He quickly considered moving to the big house, the changed future for his son, and the lifestyle that would be appropriate for him moving forward. By morning, he had thought about who the future rector of Clavering should be and had even weighed the idea of getting back into hunting. Not that he was a cold-hearted man—or that he was happy about what had happened. But a person’s perspective on generosity often shifts as they get older, and the rector was old enough to confidently acknowledge that this event wouldn’t cause him much sorrow. He had never had any love for his cousins, nor had he pretended to. He did, in a way, care for his cousin's wife, but when discussing how this tragedy would affect Hermione with his own wife, he didn’t hesitate to refer to her widowhood as a time of impending happiness.

"She will be cut to pieces," said Mrs. Clavering. "She was attached to him as earnestly as though he had treated her always well."

"She will be shattered," said Mrs. Clavering. "She was attached to him as if he had always treated her well."

"I believe it; but not the less will she feel her release, unconsciously; and her life, which has been very wretched, will gradually become easy to her."

"I believe it; but she will still feel her freedom, even if she doesn’t realize it, and her life, which has been really miserable, will slowly start to get easier for her."

Even Mrs. Clavering could not deny that this would be so, and then they reverted to matters which more closely concerned themselves. "I suppose Harry will marry at once now," said the mother.

Even Mrs. Clavering couldn't deny that this would be the case, and then they turned back to matters that were more relevant to them. "I guess Harry will get married right away now," said the mother.

"No doubt;—it is almost a pity; is it not?" The rector,—as we will still call him,—was thinking that Florence was hardly a fitting wife for his son with his altered prospects. Ah, what a grand thing it would have been if the Clavering property and Lady Ongar's jointure could have gone together!

"No doubt; it’s almost a shame, isn’t it?" The rector— as we’ll still call him— was thinking that Florence wasn’t really a suitable wife for his son with his changed circumstances. Ah, what a fantastic situation it would have been if the Clavering estate and Lady Ongar's inheritance could have been combined!

"Not a pity at all," said Mrs. Clavering. "You will find that Florence will make him a very happy man."

"Not at all," said Mrs. Clavering. "You'll see that Florence will make him really happy."

"I dare say;—I dare say. Only he would hardly have taken her had this sad accident happened before he saw her. But if she will make him happy that is everything. I have never thought much about money myself. If I find any comfort in these tidings it is for his sake, not for my own. I would sooner remain as I am." This was not altogether untrue, and yet he was thinking of the big house and the hunting.

"I must say—I really must. But he probably wouldn't have chosen her if this unfortunate incident had occurred before he met her. Still, if she can make him happy, that's what matters most. Personally, I've never cared much about money. If I take any comfort in this news, it's for his sake, not mine. I'd rather stay as I am." This wasn't entirely false, yet he was also thinking about the large house and the hunting.

"What will be done about the living?" It was early in the morning when Mrs. Clavering asked this question. She had thought much about the living during the night. And so had the rector;—but his thoughts had not run in the same direction as hers. He made no immediate answer, and then she went on with her question. "Do you think that you will keep it in your own hands?"

"What will happen with the parish?" It was early morning when Mrs. Clavering asked this question. She had thought a lot about the parish during the night. So had the rector;—but his thoughts hadn't matched hers. He didn't respond right away, so she continued with her question, "Do you think you’ll handle it yourself?"

"Well,—no; why should I? I am too idle about it as it is. I should be more so under these altered circumstances."

"Well, why should I? I'm already too lazy about it as it is. I'd be even more so under these changed circumstances."

"I am sure you would do your duty if you resolved to keep it, but I don't see why you should do so."

"I'm sure you would handle your responsibilities if you decided to keep them, but I don't understand why you should."

"Clavering is a great deal better than Humbleton," said the rector. Humbleton was the name of the parish held by Mr. Fielding, his son-in-law.

"Clavering is way better than Humbleton," said the rector. Humbleton was the name of the parish run by Mr. Fielding, his son-in-law.

But the idea here put forward did not suit the idea which was running in Mrs. Clavering's mind. "Edward and Mary are very well off," she said. "His own property is considerable, and I don't think they want anything. Besides, he would hardly like to give up a family living."

But the idea being suggested didn't match what Mrs. Clavering was thinking. "Edward and Mary are doing just fine," she said. "He has a significant amount of property, and I don't think they need anything. Plus, he probably wouldn't want to give up a family position."

"I might ask him at any rate."

"I might as well ask him."

"I was thinking of Mr. Saul," said Mrs. Clavering boldly.

"I was thinking about Mr. Saul," Mrs. Clavering said boldly.

"Of Mr. Saul!" The image of Mr. Saul, as rector of Clavering, perplexed the new baronet egregiously.

"Of Mr. Saul!" The idea of Mr. Saul, as the rector of Clavering, completely puzzled the new baronet.

"Well;—yes. He is an excellent; clergyman. No one can deny that." Then there was silence between them for a few moments. "In that case he and Fanny would of course marry. It is no good concealing the fact that she is very fond of him."

"Well, yes. He is a great clergyman. No one can argue with that." Then there was a pause between them for a few moments. "In that case, he and Fanny will obviously get married. There's no point in hiding the fact that she really likes him."

"Upon my word I can't understand it," said the rector.

"Honestly, I can't make sense of it," said the rector.

"It is so,—and as to the excellence of his character there can be no doubt." To this the rector made no answer, but went away into his dressing-room, that he might prepare himself for his walk across the park to the great house. While they were discussing who should be the future incumbent of the living, Lady Clavering was still sleeping in unconsciousness of her fate. Mr. Clavering greatly dreaded the task which was before him, and had made a little attempt to induce his wife to take the office upon herself; but she had explained to him that it would be more seemly that he should be the bearer of the tidings. "It would seem that you were wanting in affection for her if you do not go yourself," his wife had said to him. That the rector of Clavering was master of himself and of his own actions, no one who knew the family ever denied, but the instances in which he declined to follow his wife's advice were not many.

"It is true, and there's no doubt about the quality of his character." The rector didn’t respond to this but went into his dressing room to get ready for his walk across the park to the big house. While they were debating who should be the future leader of the parish, Lady Clavering was still asleep, unaware of her fate. Mr. Clavering was seriously worried about the task ahead of him and had tried to persuade his wife to take on the responsibility herself; however, she had told him that it would be more proper for him to deliver the news. "It would look like you don't care for her if you don’t go yourself," his wife had said to him. Nobody who knew the family ever doubted that the rector of Clavering was in control of himself and his actions, but he rarely chose to ignore his wife’s advice.

It was about eight o'clock when he went across the park. He had already sent a messenger with a note to beg that Lady Clavering would be up to receive him. As he would come very early, he had said, perhaps she would see him in her own room. The poor lady had, of course, been greatly frightened by this announcement; but this fear had been good for her, as they had well understood at the rectory; the blow, dreadfully sudden as it must still be, would be somewhat less sudden under this preparation. When Mr. Clavering reached the house the servant was in waiting to show him upstairs to the sitting-room which Lady Clavering usually occupied when alone. She had been there waiting for him for the last half-hour.

It was around eight o'clock when he crossed the park. He had already sent a messenger with a note asking if Lady Clavering would be available to see him. Since he was coming so early, he suggested that perhaps she could meet him in her own room. The poor lady had understandably been quite scared by this news; however, this fear had, in a way, been beneficial for her, as they had recognized at the rectory. The shock, though it would still be terribly sudden, would be slightly less overwhelming with this preparation. When Mr. Clavering arrived at the house, a servant was waiting to show him upstairs to the sitting room that Lady Clavering usually used when she was alone. She had been waiting for him there for the last half hour.

"Mr. Clavering, what is it?" she exclaimed, as he entered with tidings of death written on his visage. "In the name of heaven, what is it? You have something to tell me of Hugh."

"Mr. Clavering, what’s wrong?" she exclaimed as he came in with death written all over his face. "For heaven’s sake, what is it? You have something to tell me about Hugh."

"Dear Hermione," he said, taking her by the hand.

"Dear Hermione," he said, taking her hand.

"What is it? Tell me at once. Is he still alive?"

"What is it? Tell me right now. Is he still alive?"

The rector still held her by the hand, but spoke no word. He had been trying as he came across the park to arrange the words in which he should tell his tale, but now it was told without any speech on his part.

The rector still held her hand but didn't say a word. He had been trying to figure out the right words to tell his story as he walked through the park, but now it was told without him saying anything.

"He is dead. Why do you not speak? Why are you so cruel?"

"He’s dead. Why aren’t you speaking? Why are you being so harsh?"

"Dearest Hermione, what am I to say to comfort you?"

"Dear Hermione, what can I say to make you feel better?"

What he might say after this was of little moment, for she had fainted. He rang the bell, and then, when the servants were there,—the old housekeeper and Lady Clavering's maid,—he told to them, rather than to her, what had been their master's fate.

What he might say after this didn't matter much, because she had fainted. He rang the bell, and when the servants arrived—the old housekeeper and Lady Clavering's maid—he explained to them, rather than to her, what had happened to their master.

"And Captain Archie?" asked the housekeeper.

"And what about Captain Archie?" asked the housekeeper.

The rector shook his head, and the housekeeper knew that the rector was now the baronet. Then they took the poor widow to her own room,—should I not rather call her, as I may venture to speak the truth, the enfranchised slave than the poor widow?—and the rector, taking up his hat, promised that he would send his wife across to their mistress. His morning's task had been painful, but it had been easily accomplished. As he walked home among the oaks of Clavering Park, he told himself, no doubt, that they were now all his own.

The rector shook his head, and the housekeeper realized that the rector was now the baronet. Then they took the unfortunate widow to her room—should I not call her, if I may speak honestly, the freed slave instead of the poor widow?—and the rector, grabbing his hat, promised that he would send his wife over to their mistress. His morning's work had been tough, but it was done without much trouble. As he walked home among the oaks of Clavering Park, he likely told himself that they were now all his.

That day at the rectory was very sombre, if it was not actually sad. The greater part of the morning Mrs. Clavering passed with the widow, and sitting near her sofa she wrote sundry letters to those who were connected with the family. The longest of these was to Lady Ongar, who was now at Tenby; and in that there was a pressing request from Hermione that her sister would come to her at Clavering Park. "Tell her," said Lady Clavering, "that all her anger must be over now." But Mrs. Clavering said nothing of Julia's anger. She merely urged the request that Julia would come to her sister. "She will be sure to come," said Mrs. Clavering. "You need have no fear on that head."

That day at the rectory was very gloomy, if not outright sad. Most of the morning, Mrs. Clavering spent with the widow, and while sitting by her sofa, she wrote several letters to those connected to the family. The longest one was addressed to Lady Ongar, who was currently in Tenby, and in it, Hermione urgently requested that her sister come to Clavering Park. "Tell her," said Lady Clavering, "that all her anger should be gone by now." But Mrs. Clavering didn’t mention Julia’s anger. She simply emphasized the request for Julia to visit her sister. "She will definitely come," said Mrs. Clavering. "You don’t have to worry about that."

"But how can I invite her here, when the house is not my own?"

"But how can I invite her over when the house isn't mine?"

"Pray do not talk in that way, Hermione. The house will be your own for any time that you may want it. Your husband's relations are your dear friends; are they not?" But this allusion to her husband brought her to another fit of hysterical tears. "Both of them gone," she said. "Both of them gone!" Mrs. Clavering knew well that she was not alluding to the two brothers, but to her husband and to her baby. Of poor Archie no one had said a word,—beyond that one word spoken by the housekeeper. For her, it had been necessary that she should know who was now the master of Clavering Park.

"Please don’t talk like that, Hermione. The house will always be yours whenever you need it. Your husband’s family are your close friends, right?" But mentioning her husband made her start crying hysterically again. "Both of them gone," she said. "Both of them gone!" Mrs. Clavering knew she wasn’t talking about the two brothers, but about her husband and her baby. No one had mentioned poor Archie—except for the housekeeper’s one word. For her, it was important to know who was now in charge of Clavering Park.

Twice in the day Mrs. Clavering went over to the big house, and on her second return, late in the evening, she found her son. When she arrived, there had already been some few words on the subject between him and his father.

Twice during the day, Mrs. Clavering went over to the big house, and on her second return, late in the evening, she found her son. When she got there, he and his father had already exchanged a few words about the matter.

"You have heard of it, Harry?"

"Have you heard of it, Harry?"

"Yes; a clerk came to me from the banker's."

"Yes, a clerk from the bank came to see me."

"Dreadful; is it not? Quite terrible to think of!"

"Dreadful, isn't it? It's really terrible to think about!"

"Indeed it is, sir. I was never so shocked in my life."

"Definitely, sir. I’ve never been so shocked in my life."

"He would go in that cursed boat, though I know that he was advised against it," said the father, holding up his hands and shaking his head. "And now both of them gone;—both gone at once!"

"He’s going in that damn boat, even though I know he was warned not to," the father said, raising his hands and shaking his head. "And now both of them are gone;—both gone at the same time!"

"How does she bear it?"

"How does she handle it?"

"Your mother is with her now. When I went in the morning,—I had written a line, and she expected bad news,—she fainted. Of course, I could do nothing. I can hardly say that I told her. She asked the question, and then saw by my face that her fears were well-founded. Upon my word, I was glad when she did faint;—it was the best thing for her."

"Your mom is with her now. When I went in the morning—I had written a note, and she was expecting bad news—she fainted. Of course, there was nothing I could do. I can hardly say I actually told her. She asked the question, and then saw from my face that her fears were true. Honestly, I was relieved when she fainted; it was the best thing for her."

"It must have been very painful for you."

"It must have been really painful for you."

"Terrible;—terrible;" and the rector shook his head. "It will make a great difference in your prospects, Harry."

"That's awful; really awful," the rector said, shaking his head. "This will seriously impact your future, Harry."

"And in your life, sir! So to say, you are as young a man as myself."

"And in your life, sir! Honestly, you're just as young a man as I am."

"Am I? I believe I was about as young when you were born. But I don't think at all about myself in this matter. I am too old to care to change my manner of living. It won't affect me very much. Indeed, I hardly know yet how it may affect me. Your mother thinks I ought to give up the living. If you were in orders, Harry—"

"Am I? I think I was about the same age when you were born. But I really don’t think about myself in this situation. I’m too old to want to change my way of living. It won't make much difference to me. In fact, I barely understand how it might affect me. Your mom believes I should give up the position. If you were in the clergy, Harry—

"I'm very glad, sir, that I am not."

"I'm really glad, sir, that I'm not."

"I suppose so. And there is no need; certainly, there is no need. You will be able to do pretty nearly what you like about the property. I shall not care to interfere."

"I guess so. And there's really no need; definitely, no need. You'll be able to do almost whatever you want with the property. I won't mind interfering."

"Yes, you will, sir. It feels strange now, but you will soon get used to it. I wonder whether he left a will."

"Yeah, you will, sir. It feels weird right now, but you’ll get used to it soon. I’m curious if he left a will."

"It can't make any difference to you, you know. Every acre of the property is entailed. She has her settlement. Eight hundred a year, I think it is. She'll not be a rich woman like her sister. I wonder where she'll live. As far as that goes, she might stay at the house, if she likes it. I'm sure your mother wouldn't object."

"It won't matter to you, you know. Every acre of the property is tied up. She has her settlement. I think it’s eight hundred a year. She won't be as wealthy as her sister. I wonder where she'll live. Actually, she could stay in the house if she wants. I'm sure your mom wouldn't mind."

Harry on this occasion asked no question about the living, but he also had thought of that. He knew well that his mother would befriend Mr. Saul, and he knew also that his father would ultimately take his mother's advice. As regarded himself he had no personal objection to Mr. Saul, though he could not understand how his sister should feel any strong regard for such a man.

Harry didn't ask any questions about the living this time, but he had thought about it. He knew that his mother would support Mr. Saul, and he also knew that his father would eventually listen to his mother's advice. As for himself, he had no personal issues with Mr. Saul, even though he couldn't understand why his sister felt so strongly about a man like him.

Edward Fielding would make a better neighbour at the parsonage, and then he thought whether an exchange might not be made. After that, and before his mother's return from the great house, he took a stroll through the park with Fanny. Fanny altogether declined to discuss any of the family prospects, as they were affected by the accident which had happened. To her mind the tragedy was so terrible that she could only feel its tragic element. No doubt she had her own thoughts about Mr. Saul as connected with it. "What would he think of this sudden death of the two brothers? How would he feel it? If she could be allowed to talk to him on the matter, what would he say of their fate here and hereafter? Would he go to the great house to offer the consolations of religion to the widow?" Of all this she thought much; but no picture of Mr. Saul as rector of Clavering, or of herself as mistress in her mother's house, presented itself to her mind. Harry found her to be a dull companion, and he, perhaps, consoled himself with some personal attention to the oak trees. The trees loomed larger upon him now than they had ever done before.

Edward Fielding would be a better neighbor at the parsonage, and then he thought about whether a swap might be possible. After that, and before his mother got back from the big house, he took a walk through the park with Fanny. Fanny completely refused to discuss any of the family’s future plans, especially considering the accident that had happened. To her, the tragedy was so awful that she could only focus on its tragic side. No doubt she had her own thoughts about Mr. Saul in connection with it. "What would he think about the sudden deaths of the two brothers? How would he feel about it? If she could talk to him about it, what would he say about their fate here and in the afterlife? Would he go to the big house to offer comfort of faith to the widow?" She thought a lot about all this; however, no image of Mr. Saul as rector of Clavering, or of herself as the mistress in her mother's house, came to her mind. Harry found her to be a boring companion, and he perhaps distracted himself by paying some attention to the oak trees. The trees seemed more significant to him now than they ever had before.

On the third day the rector went up to London, leaving Harry at the parsonage. It was necessary that lawyers should be visited, and that such facts as to the loss should be proved as were capable of proof. There was no doubt at all as to the fate of Sir Hugh and his brother. The escape of Mr. Stuart and of two of those employed by him prevented the possibility of a doubt. The vessel had been caught in a gale off Heligoland, and had foundered. They had all striven to get into the yacht's boat, but those who had succeeded in doing so had gone down. The master of the yacht had seen the two brothers perish. Those who were saved had been picked up off the spars to which they had attached themselves. There was no doubt in the way of the new baronet, and no difficulty.

On the third day, the rector went up to London, leaving Harry at the parsonage. It was necessary to meet with lawyers and provide proof of the loss. There was no doubt about the fate of Sir Hugh and his brother. The escape of Mr. Stuart and two of his crew made any doubt impossible. The ship had been caught in a storm off Heligoland and had sunk. Everyone had tried to get into the yacht's lifeboat, but those who managed to get in had gone down. The yacht’s captain had witnessed the two brothers perish. The survivors had been rescued from the debris to which they had clung. There was no question about the new baronet, and no obstacles.

Nor was there any will made either by Sir Hugh or his brother. Poor Archie had nothing to leave, and that he should have left no will was not remarkable. But neither had there been much in the power of Sir Hugh to bequeath, nor was there any great cause for a will on his part. Had he left a son, his son would have inherited everything. He had, however, died childless, and his wife was provided for by her settlement. On his marriage he had made the amount settled as small as his wife's friends would accept, and no one who knew the man expected that he would increase the amount after his death. Having been in town for three days the rector returned,—being then in full possession of the title; but this he did not assume till after the second Sunday from the date of the telegram which brought the news.

Nor did Sir Hugh or his brother make a will. Poor Archie had nothing to leave behind, so it wasn't surprising that he didn't have a will. But Sir Hugh also didn't have much to pass on, and there wasn't really a strong reason for him to create a will. If he had a son, that son would have inherited everything. However, he died without children, and his wife was taken care of by her settlement. When he got married, he kept the settled amount as low as his wife’s friends would agree to, and no one who knew him expected him to increase that amount after his death. After being in town for three days, the rector returned, fully holding the title, but he didn't take it on until after the second Sunday following the telegram that delivered the news.

In the meantime Harry had written to Florence, to whom the tidings were as important as to any one concerned. She had left London very triumphant,—quite confident that she had nothing now to fear from Lady Ongar or from any other living woman, having not only forgiven Harry his sins, but having succeeded also in persuading herself that there had been no sins to forgive,—having quarrelled with her brother half-a-dozen times in that he would not accept her arguments on this matter. He too would forgive Harry,—had forgiven him; was quite ready to omit all further remark on the matter; but could not bring himself when urged by Florence to admit that her Apollo had been altogether godlike. Florence had thus left London in triumph, but she had gone with a conviction that she and Harry must remain apart for some indefinite time, which probably must be measured by years. "Let us see at the end of two years," she had said; and Harry had been forced to be content. But how would it be with her now?

In the meantime, Harry had written to Florence, who found the news as significant as anyone else involved. She had left London feeling victorious—totally convinced that she no longer had to worry about Lady Ongar or any other woman, having not only forgiven Harry for his mistakes but also managed to convince herself that there were no mistakes to forgive. She had argued with her brother several times because he wouldn’t accept her point of view on this issue. He would forgive Harry—had already forgiven him; he was definitely willing to drop the subject altogether but couldn’t bring himself, even when Florence pushed him, to say that her perfect man had been flawless. Florence had thus departed from London in triumph, but she took with her the belief that she and Harry needed to stay apart for an unspecified period, likely lasting for years. “Let’s see in two years,” she had said, and Harry had reluctantly agreed. But how would things be for her now?

Harry of course began his letter by telling her of the catastrophe, with the usual amount of epithets. It was very terrible, awful, shocking,—the saddest thing that had ever happened! The poor widow was in a desperate state, and all the Claverings were nearly beside themselves. But when this had been duly said, he allowed himself to go into their own home question. "I cannot fail," he wrote, "to think of this chiefly as it concerns you,—or rather, as it concerns myself in reference to you. I suppose I shall leave the business now. Indeed, my father seems to think that my remaining there would be absurd, and my mother agrees with him. As I am the only son, the property will enable me to live easily without a profession. When I say 'me,' of course you will understand what 'me' means. The better part of 'me' is so prudent, that I know she will not accept this view of things without ever so much consideration, and, therefore, she must come to Clavering to hear it discussed by the elders. For myself, I cannot bear to think that I should take delight in the results of this dreadful misfortune; but how am I to keep myself from being made happy by the feeling that we may now be married without further delay? After all that has passed, nothing will make me happy or even permanently comfortable till I can call you fairly my own. My mother has already said that she hopes you will come here in about a fortnight,—that is, as soon as we shall have fallen tolerably into our places again; but she will write herself before that time. I have written a line to your brother addressed to the office, which I suppose will find him. I have written also to Cecilia. Your brother, no doubt, will hear the news first through the French newspapers." Then he said a little, but a very little, as to their future modes of life, just intimating to her, and no more, that her destiny might probably call upon her to be the mother of a future baronet.

Harry naturally started his letter by telling her about the disaster, with all the usual dramatic language. It was so terrible, awful, shocking— the saddest thing that had ever happened! The poor widow was in a desperate state, and all the Claverings were nearly going out of their minds. But once he had made that point, he allowed himself to discuss their own situation. "I can’t help but think of this mainly in relation to you—or rather, to me in relation to you. I guess I’ll be leaving the business now. My father thinks it would be ridiculous for me to stay, and my mother agrees with him. Since I’m the only son, the property will allow me to live comfortably without a job. When I say ‘me,’ you know what I mean. The better part of ‘me’ is so sensible that I know she won’t accept this without a lot of thought, so she must come to Clavering to hear the elders discuss it. For my part, I can’t bear the thought of enjoying the outcome of this terrible misfortune; but how can I help feeling happy knowing that we can get married without any further hold-ups? After everything that’s happened, nothing will make me happy or even truly comfortable until I can call you mine. My mom has already said she hopes you can come over in about two weeks— that is, as soon as we’ve settled back into our routines; but she’ll write to you herself before then. I’ve sent a quick note to your brother at the office, so I assume he’ll get it. I’ve also written to Cecilia. Your brother will probably hear the news first through the French papers." Then he mentioned a little bit, but just a tiny bit, about their future lives together, casually suggesting to her that her fate might soon lead her to be the mother of a future baronet.

The news had reached Clavering on a Saturday. On the following Sunday every one in the parish had no doubt heard of it, but nothing on the subject was said in church on that day. The rector remained at home during the morning, and the whole service was performed by Mr. Saul. But on the second Sunday Mr. Fielding had come over from Humbleton, and he preached a sermon on the loss which the parish had sustained in the sudden death of the two brothers. It is, perhaps, well that such sermons should be preached. The inhabitants of Clavering would have felt that their late lords had been treated like dogs, had no word been said of them in the house of God. The nature of their fate had forbidden even the common ceremony of a burial service. It is well that some respect should be maintained from the low in station towards those who are high, even when no respect has been deserved. And, for the widow's sake, it was well that some notice should be taken in Clavering of this death of the head of the Claverings. But I should not myself have liked the duty of preaching an eulogistic sermon on the lives and death of Hugh Clavering and his brother Archie. What had either of them ever done to merit a good word from any man, or to earn the love of any woman? That Sir Hugh had been loved by his wife had come from the nature of the woman, not at all from the qualities of the man. Both of the brothers had lived on the unexpressed theory of consuming, for the benefit of their own backs and their own bellies, the greatest possible amount of those good things which fortune might put in their way. I doubt whether either of them had ever contributed anything willingly to the comfort or happiness of any human being. Hugh, being powerful by nature and having a strong will, had tyrannized over all those who were subject to him. Archie, not gifted as was his brother, had been milder, softer, and less actively hateful; but his principle of action had been the same. Everything for himself! Was it not well that two such men should be consigned to the fishes, and that the world,—especially the Clavering world, and that poor widow, who now felt herself to be so inexpressibly wretched when her period of comfort was in truth only commencing,—was it not well that the world and Clavering should be well quit of them? That idea is the one which one would naturally have felt inclined to put into one's sermon on such an occasion; and then to sing some song of rejoicing;—either to do that, or to leave the matter alone.

The news reached Clavering on a Saturday. By the following Sunday, everyone in the parish had undoubtedly heard about it, but nothing was mentioned during the church service that day. The rector stayed home that morning, and Mr. Saul led the entire service. However, the second Sunday, Mr. Fielding came over from Humbleton and preached a sermon about the loss the parish faced with the sudden deaths of the two brothers. It’s probably a good thing that such sermons are delivered. The people of Clavering would have felt their late lords were treated poorly if there had been no mention of them in the house of God. The nature of their deaths even prevented the usual burial service. It’s important to maintain some respect from those of lower status towards those of higher status, even if they don’t deserve it. And for the widow's sake, it was right that Clavering acknowledged the death of the head of the Claverings. However, I personally wouldn’t have wanted the responsibility of delivering a eulogistic sermon about the lives and deaths of Hugh Clavering and his brother Archie. What had either of them done to deserve a kind word from anyone or to earn the affection of any woman? Sir Hugh was loved by his wife due to who she was, not because of him. Both brothers lived by the unspoken principle of taking as much as they could for their own benefit. I doubt either of them ever willingly contributed to the comfort or happiness of anyone. Hugh, being powerful and strong-willed, had dominated everyone around him. Archie, who wasn’t as gifted as his brother, was gentler, softer, and less overtly hateful; but his motivations were the same. Everything for himself! Wasn’t it a good thing that two such men were gone, and that the world—especially the Clavering world, and that poor widow who now felt incredibly miserable when her true period of comfort was just beginning—was better off without them? That’s the thought one might have wanted to include in a sermon on such an occasion; and then follow it up with a song of celebration—either that or leave it alone.

But not so are such sermons preached; and not after that fashion did the young clergyman who had married the first-cousin of these Claverings buckle himself to the subject. He indeed had, I think, but little difficulty, either inwardly with his conscience, or outwardly with his subject. He possessed the power of a pleasant, easy flow of words, and of producing tears, if not from other eyes, at any rate from his own. He drew a picture of the little ship amidst the storm, and of God's hand as it moved in its anger upon the waters; but of the cause of that divine wrath and its direction he said nothing. Then, of the suddenness of death and its awfulness he said much, not insisting as he did so on the necessity of repentance for salvation, as far as those two poor sinners were concerned. No, indeed;—how could any preacher have done that? But he improved the occasion by telling those around him that they should so live as to be ever ready for the hand of death. If that were possible, where then indeed would be the victory of the grave? And at last he came to the master and lord whom they had lost. Even here there was no difficulty for him. The heir had gone first, and then the father and his brother. Who among them would not pity the bereaved mother and the widow? Who among them would not remember with affection the babe whom they had seen at that font, and with respect the landlord under whose rule they had lived? How pleasant it must be to ask those questions which no one can rise to answer! Farmer Gubbins as he sat by, listening with what power of attention had been vouchsafed to him, felt himself to be somewhat moved, but soon released himself from the task, and allowed his mind to run away into other ideas. The rector was a kindly man and a generous. The rector would allow him to enclose that little bit of common land, that was to be taken in, without adding anything to his rent. The rector would be there on audit days, and things would be very pleasant. Farmer Gubbins, when the slight murmuring gurgle of the preacher's tears was heard, shook his own head by way of a responsive wail; but at that moment he was congratulating himself on the coming comfort of the new reign. Mr. Fielding, however, got great credit for his sermon; and it did, probably, more good than harm,—unless, indeed, we should take into our calculation, in giving our award on this subject, the permanent utility of all truth, and the permanent injury of all falsehood.

But that’s not how most sermons are delivered; and the young clergyman who married the first cousin of these Claverings didn't approach the topic in that way. He honestly had, I think, very little trouble, whether with his own conscience or with the subject at hand. He had a nice, easy way with words and could bring tears to his own eyes, if not to anyone else's. He painted a picture of the small ship caught in the storm, describing God's fury moving across the waters, but he said nothing about the reason for that divine anger or where it was aimed. Then, he talked a lot about the suddenness and terror of death, without stressing the need for repentance for salvation concerning those two poor sinners. No, really; how could any preacher do that? Instead, he took the opportunity to tell everyone present to live in a way that they would always be ready for death's hand. If that were possible, then where would the victory of the grave really stand? Finally, he spoke about the master and lord they had lost. Even here, he found no challenge. The heir had passed away first, and then the father and his brother. Who among them wouldn’t feel for the grieving mother and the widow? Who wouldn’t fondly recall the baby they had seen at the font and respect the landlord under whom they had lived? How nice it must be to pose those questions that no one can truly answer! Farmer Gubbins, sitting nearby and listening as attentively as he could, felt somewhat moved, but soon let his mind wander into other thoughts. The rector was a kind and generous man. The rector would allow him to enclose that little piece of common land without raising his rent. The rector would be there on audit days, and things would be very nice. When the soft murmuring of the preacher’s tears was heard, Farmer Gubbins shook his head as a way of showing his own sorrow; but at that moment, he was congratulating himself on the upcoming comfort of the new reign. Mr. Fielding, however, received a lot of praise for his sermon; and it likely did more good than harm—unless, of course, we take into account the lasting value of all truth and the lasting harm of all falsehood.

Mr. Fielding remained at the parsonage during the greater part of the following week, and then there took place a great deal of family conversation respecting the future incumbent of the living. At these family conclaves, however, Fanny was not asked to be present. Mrs. Clavering, who knew well how to do such work, was gradually bringing her husband round to endure the name of Mr. Saul. Twenty times had he asserted that he could not understand it; but, whether or no such understanding might ever be possible, he was beginning to recognize it as true that the thing not understood was a fact. His daughter Fanny was positively in love with Mr. Saul, and that to such an extent that her mother believed her happiness to be involved in it. "I can't understand it;—upon my word I can't," said the rector for the last time, and then he gave way. There was now the means of giving an ample provision for the lovers, and that provision was to be given.

Mr. Fielding stayed at the parsonage for most of the following week, during which there was a lot of family discussion about who would take over the position. However, Fanny wasn’t invited to these family meetings. Mrs. Clavering, who was skilled at this kind of persuasion, was gradually getting her husband to accept the idea of Mr. Saul. He had insisted at least twenty times that he couldn’t understand it, but whether or not he ever would, he was starting to come to terms with the fact that something he didn’t understand was indeed a reality. His daughter Fanny was genuinely in love with Mr. Saul, and to such a degree that her mother believed her happiness depended on it. “I can't understand it; I really can't,” the rector said one last time, and then he conceded. There was now a way to provide well for the couple, and that support would be given.

Mr. Fielding shook his head,—not in this instance as to Fanny's predilection for Mr. Saul; though in discussing that matter with his own wife he had shaken his head very often; but he shook it now with reference to the proposed change. He was very well where he was. And although Clavering was better than Humbleton, it was not so much better as to induce him to throw his own family over by proposing to send Mr. Saul among them. Mr. Saul was an excellent clergyman, but perhaps his uncle, who had given him his living, might not like Mr. Saul. Thus it was decided in these conclaves that Mr. Saul was to be the future rector of Clavering.

Mr. Fielding shook his head—not about Fanny's preference for Mr. Saul; he had done plenty of that while discussing it with his wife. But now he shook his head about the proposed change. He was quite happy where he was. And while Clavering was better than Humbleton, it wasn’t enough to make him abandon his own family by suggesting Mr. Saul join them. Mr. Saul was a great clergyman, but maybe his uncle, who had given him his position, wouldn't approve of Mr. Saul. So, in these meetings, it was decided that Mr. Saul would be the future rector of Clavering.

In the meantime poor Fanny moped,—wretched in her solitude, anticipating no such glorious joys as her mother was preparing for her; and Mr. Saul was preparing with energy for his departure into foreign parts.

In the meantime, poor Fanny was sulking—miserable in her loneliness, expecting none of the wonderful pleasures her mother was getting ready for her; and Mr. Saul was energetically preparing for his departure to foreign lands.

 

 

CHAPTER XLV.

IS SHE MAD?

Lady Ongar was at Tenby when she received Mrs. Clavering's letter, and had not heard of the fate of her brother-in-law till the news reached her in that way. She had gone down to a lodging at Tenby with no attendant but one maid, and was preparing herself for the great surrender of her property which she meditated. Hitherto she had heard nothing from the Courtons or their lawyer as to the offer she had made about Ongar Park; but the time had been short, and lawyers' work, as she knew, was never done in a hurry. She had gone to Tenby, flying, in truth, from the loneliness of London to the loneliness of the sea-shore,—but expecting she knew not what comfort from the change. She would take with her no carriage, and there would, as she thought, be excitement even in that. She would take long walks by herself;—she would read;—nay, if possible, she would study and bring herself to some habits of industry. Hitherto she had failed in everything, but now she would try if some mode of success might not be open to her. She would ascertain, too, on what smallest sum she could live respectably and without penury, and would keep only so much out of Lord Ongar's wealth.

Lady Ongar was at Tenby when she got Mrs. Clavering's letter, and she hadn’t heard about her brother-in-law’s situation until then. She had gone down to a lodging at Tenby with just one maid to help her and was preparing for the big decision to give up her property that she was planning. So far, she hadn’t received any news from the Courtons or their lawyer regarding her offer about Ongar Park; but she knew that the time had been short, and legal matters were never handled quickly. She had come to Tenby, essentially escaping the solitude of London for the solitude of the seaside—hoping for some kind of comfort from the change. She didn’t bring a carriage with her, thinking there might be a thrill in that as well. She planned to take long walks by herself, read, and even, if she could, study and develop some productive habits. Up until now, she had failed at everything, but this time she wanted to see if there was a way for her to succeed. She also wanted to figure out the smallest amount of money she could live on comfortably without being broke, and keep only as much of Lord Ongar’s wealth as she needed.

But hitherto her life at Tenby had not been successful. Solitary days were longer there even than they had been in London. People stared at her more; and, though she did not own it to herself, she missed greatly the comforts of her London house. As for reading, I doubt whether she did much better by the seaside than she had done in the town. Men and women say that they will read, and think so,—those, I mean, who have acquired no habit of reading,—believing the work to be, of all works, the easiest. It may be work, they think, but of all works it must be the easiest of achievement. Given the absolute faculty of reading, the task of going through the pages of a book must be, of all tasks, the most certainly within the grasp of the man or woman who attempts it! Alas, no;—if the habit be not there, of all tasks it is the most difficult. If a man have not acquired the habit of reading till he be old, he shall sooner in his old age learn to make shoes than learn the adequate use of a book. And worse again;—under such circumstances the making of shoes shall be more pleasant to him than the reading of a book. Let those who are not old,—who are still young, ponder this well. Lady Ongar, indeed, was not old, by no means too old to clothe herself in new habits. But even she was old enough to find that the doing so was a matter of much difficulty. She had her books around her; but, in spite of her books, she was sadly in want of some excitement when the letter from Clavering came to her relief.

But up until now, her time in Tenby hadn’t been great. The lonely days felt even longer there than they had in London. People stared at her more, and, though she wouldn’t admit it, she really missed the comforts of her London home. As for reading, I doubt she did any better by the seaside than she had in the city. Men and women say they’ll read, and they believe it—those, I mean, who don’t have a habit of reading—thinking it’s the easiest thing to do. They think it may be work, but it must be the easiest work to achieve. Given that they can read, going through the pages of a book should be something anyone can do! Unfortunately, that’s not true; if the habit isn’t there, it’s actually the hardest task. If someone hasn’t picked up the habit of reading by the time they’re older, they’ll learn to make shoes before they’ll learn how to use a book properly. And even worse; in those circumstances, making shoes will be more enjoyable than reading. Let those who are not old—who are still young—think about this carefully. Lady Ongar, in fact, was not old, definitely not too old to adopt new habits. But even she was old enough to realize that doing so was quite difficult. She had her books around her, but despite them, she found herself in need of some excitement when the letter from Clavering arrived just in time to help her.

It was indeed a relief. Her brother-in-law dead, and he also who had so lately been her suitor! These two men whom she had so lately seen in lusty health,—proud with all the pride of outward life,—had both, by a stroke of the winds, been turned into nothing. A terrible retribution had fallen upon her enemy,—for as her enemy she had ever regarded Hugh Clavering since her husband's death. She took no joy in this retribution. There was no feeling of triumph at her heart in that he had perished. She did not tell herself that she was glad,—either for her own sake or for her sister's. But mingled with the awe she felt there was a something of unexpressed and inexpressible relief. Her present life was very grievous to her,—and now had occurred that which would open to her new hopes and a new mode of living. Her brother-in-law had oppressed her by his very existence, and now he was gone. Had she had no brother-in-law who ought to have welcomed her, her return to England would not have been terrible to her as it had been. Her sister would be now restored to her, and her solitude would probably be at an end. And then the very excitement occasioned by the news was salutary to her. She was, in truth, shocked. As she said to her maid, she felt it to be very dreadful. But, nevertheless, the day on which she received those tidings was less wearisome to her than any other of the days that she had passed at Tenby.

It was definitely a relief. Her brother-in-law was dead, and he had also been her suitor not long ago! These two men, whom she had recently seen full of life and confidence, had both, in an instant, been reduced to nothing. A harsh comeuppance had befallen her enemy—because she had always seen Hugh Clavering as her enemy since her husband's death. She felt no joy in this comeuppance. There was no sense of triumph in her heart at his demise. She didn’t pretend to be glad—for her own sake or her sister's. But mixed with the fear she felt was an unspoken and indescribable relief. Her current life was very difficult for her—and now something had happened that could open up new hopes and a different way of living. Her brother-in-law had weighed her down with his very presence, and now he was gone. If she hadn’t had a brother-in-law who should have welcomed her, her return to England wouldn’t have been as distressing as it had been. Her sister would now be returned to her, and her loneliness would likely come to an end. Plus, the very excitement of receiving the news was helpful to her. She was, in fact, shocked. As she told her maid, she found it very awful. Yet, the day she got that news was less exhausting for her than any of the other days she had spent at Tenby.

Poor Archie! Some feeling of a tear, some half-formed drop that was almost a tear, came to her eye as she thought of his fate. How foolish he had always been, how unintelligent, how deficient in all those qualities which recommend men to women! But the very memory of his deficiencies created something like a tenderness in his favour. Hugh was disagreeable, nay hateful, by reason of the power which he possessed; whereas Archie was not hateful at all, and was disagreeable simply because nature had been a niggard to him. And then he had professed himself to be her lover. There had not been much in this; for he had come, of course, for her money; but even when that is the case a woman will feel something for the man who has offered to link his lot with hers. Of all those to whom the fate of the two brothers had hitherto been matter of moment, I think that Lady Ongar felt more than any other for the fate of poor Archie.

Poor Archie! A hint of a tear, a half-formed drop that was almost a tear, welled up in her eye as she thought about his fate. How foolish he had always been, how unintelligent, how lacking in all those qualities that attract women! But just remembering his shortcomings stirred a sense of tenderness for him. Hugh was unpleasant, even detestable, because of the power he held; meanwhile, Archie wasn’t detestable at all and was simply disagreeable because nature had been stingy with him. And then he had declared himself her lover. There wasn’t much to that; he had obviously come for her money. Yet even when that’s the case, a woman can’t help but feel something for the man who has offered to share his life with hers. Of all those who had cared about the fate of the two brothers so far, I think Lady Ongar felt the most for poor Archie.

And how would it affect Harry Clavering? She had desired to give Harry all the good things of the world, thinking that they would become him well,—thinking that they would become him very well as reaching him from her hand. Now he would have them all, but would not have them from her. Now he would have them all, and would share them with Florence Burton. Ah,—if she could have been true to him in those early days,—in those days when she had feared his poverty,—would it not have been well now with her also? The measure of her retribution was come full home to her at last! Sir Harry Clavering! She tried the name and found that it sounded very well. And she thought of the figure of the man and of his nature, and she knew that he would bear it with a becoming manliness. Sir Harry Clavering would be somebody in his county,—would be a husband of whom his wife would be proud as he went about among his tenants and his gamekeepers,—and perhaps on wider and better journeys, looking up the voters of his neighbourhood. Yes; happy would be the wife of Sir Harry Clavering. He was a man who would delight in sharing his house, his hopes, his schemes and councils with his wife. He would find a companion in his wife. He would do honour to his wife, and make much of her. He would like to see her go bravely. And then, if children came, how tender he would be to them! Whether Harry could ever have become a good head to a poor household might be doubtful, but no man had ever been born fitter for the position which he was now called upon to fill. It was thus that Lady Ongar thought of Harry Clavering as she owned to herself that the full measure of her just retribution had come home to her.

And how would it impact Harry Clavering? She had wanted to give Harry all the best things in life, believing that they would suit him well—especially if they came from her. Now he would have everything, but not from her. Now he would enjoy everything and share it with Florence Burton. Ah, if she could have been loyal to him back in those early days—back when she had worried about his financial struggles—wouldn’t it have been better for her, too? The extent of her consequences had finally hit her! Sir Harry Clavering! She tried the name and found it sounded great. She thought of the man and his character and realized he would carry it with dignity. Sir Harry Clavering would be someone significant in his area—someone his wife would be proud of as he mingled with his tenants and gamekeepers—and perhaps on more expansive and meaningful trips, connecting with the voters in his community. Yes, the wife of Sir Harry Clavering would be happy. He was a man who would enjoy sharing his home, dreams, plans, and discussions with his wife. He would see her as a partner. He would honor her and value her. He would love to see her flourish. And then, if children came along, how affectionate he would be with them! Whether Harry could have truly been a good head of a poor household might be uncertain, but no man was more suited for the role he was now meant to take on. That was how Lady Ongar thought of Harry Clavering as she admitted to herself that she had received the just consequences of her actions.

Of course she would go at once to Clavering Park. She wrote to her sister saying so, and the next day she started. She started so quickly on her journey that she reached the house not very many hours after her own letter. She was there when the rector started for London, and there when Mr. Fielding preached his sermon; but she did not see Mr. Clavering before he went, nor was she present to hear the eloquence of the younger clergyman. Till after that Sunday the only member of the family she had seen was Mrs. Clavering, who spent some period of every day up at the great house. Mrs. Clavering had not hitherto seen Lady Ongar since her return, and was greatly astonished at the change which so short a time had made. "She is handsomer than ever she was," Mrs. Clavering said to the rector; "but it is that beauty which some women carry into middle life, and not the loveliness of youth." Lady Ongar's manner was cold and stately when first she met Mrs. Clavering. It was on the morning of her marriage when they had last met,—when Julia Brabazon was resolving that she would look like a countess, and that to be a countess should be enough for her happiness. She could not but remember this now, and was unwilling at first to make confession of her failure by any meekness of conduct. It behoved her to be proud, at any rate till she should know how this new Lady Clavering would receive her. And then it was more than probable that this new Lady Clavering knew all that had taken place between her and Harry. It behoved her, therefore, to hold her head on high.

Of course she would head straight to Clavering Park. She wrote to her sister about it, and the next day she set off. She left so quickly that she arrived at the house just a few hours after sending her letter. She was there when the rector left for London, and there when Mr. Fielding delivered his sermon; but she didn't see Mr. Clavering before he left, and she wasn’t there to hear the younger clergyman's eloquence. Before that Sunday, the only family member she had seen was Mrs. Clavering, who spent some time each day at the big house. Mrs. Clavering hadn’t seen Lady Ongar since her return and was quite surprised by the change that such a short time had brought. "She’s more beautiful than she ever was," Mrs. Clavering said to the rector; "but it’s the kind of beauty some women carry into middle age, not the freshness of youth." Lady Ongar's demeanor was cold and formal when she first encountered Mrs. Clavering. The last time they met was the morning of her wedding—when Julia Brabazon was determined to look like a countess and thought being a countess would be enough for her happiness. She couldn't help but remember that now and was initially reluctant to show any sign of her failure through humble behavior. She felt she needed to be proud, at least until she figured out how this new Lady Clavering would react to her. And it was highly likely that this new Lady Clavering was aware of everything that had happened between her and Harry. So, she needed to keep her head held high.

But before the week was over, Mrs. Clavering,—for we will still call her so,—had broken Lady Ongar's spirit by her kindness; and the poor woman who had so much to bear had brought herself to speak of the weight of her burden. Julia had, on one occasion, called her Lady Clavering, and for the moment this had been allowed to pass without observation. The widowed lady was then present, and no notice of the name was possible. But soon afterwards Mrs. Clavering made her little request on the subject. "I do not quite know what the custom may be," she said, "but do not call me so just yet. It will only be reminding Hermy of her bereavement."

But before the week was over, Mrs. Clavering—since we’ll continue to call her that—had uplifted Lady Ongar’s spirit with her kindness; and the poor woman, who had so much to handle, finally opened up about the weight of her struggles. Julia had, at one point, referred to her as Lady Clavering, and for a moment, no one acknowledged it. The widow was there at the time, so no one could mention the name. But soon after, Mrs. Clavering made her small request about it. “I’m not really sure what the norm is,” she said, “but please don’t call me that just yet. It will just remind Hermy of her loss.”

"She is thinking of it always," said Julia.

"She's always thinking about it," said Julia.

"No doubt she is; but still the new name would wound her. And, indeed, it perplexes me also. Let it come by-and-by, when we are more settled."

"No doubt she is; but the new name would still hurt her. And, honestly, it confuses me too. Let's deal with it later, when we are more settled."

Lady Ongar had truly said that her sister was as yet always thinking of her bereavement. To her now it was as though the husband she had lost had been a paragon among men. She could only remember of him his manliness, his power,—a dignity of presence which he possessed,—and the fact that to her he had been everything. She thought of that last and vain caution which she had given him, when with her hardly permitted last embrace she had besought him to take care of himself. She did not remember now how coldly that embrace had been received, how completely those words had been taken as meaning nothing, how he had left her not only without a sign of affection, but without an attempt to repress the evidences of his indifference. But she did remember that she had had her arm upon his shoulder, and tried to think of that embrace as though it had been sweet to her. And she did remember how she had stood at the window, listening to the sounds of the wheels which took him off, and watching his form as long as her eye could rest upon it. Ah! what falsehoods she told herself now of her love to him, and of his goodness to her; pious falsehoods which would surely tend to bring some comfort to her wounded spirit.

Lady Ongar had truly said that her sister was still constantly thinking about her loss. To her, it felt like the husband she had lost had been a model man. All she could remember about him was his strength, his power, and the dignified presence he had—how he had been everything to her. She recalled that last and fruitless warning she had given him, when with her barely allowed final embrace, she had pleaded for him to take care of himself. She didn’t remember how coldly he had received that embrace, how completely he had ignored her words, how he had left her without any sign of affection, and without even trying to hide his indifference. But she did remember that she had her arm on his shoulder and tried to think of that embrace as if it had been sweet to her. She recalled how she had stood by the window, listening to the sounds of the wheels taking him away and watching his figure for as long as she could. Ah, what lies she told herself now about her love for him and his goodness to her; comforting lies that she hoped would soothe her troubled heart.

But her sister could hardly bear to hear the praises of Sir Hugh. When she found how it was to be, she resolved that she would bear them,—bear them, and not contradict them; but her struggle in doing so was great, and was almost too much for her.

But her sister could barely stand to hear Sir Hugh being praised. When she realized how things were going to be, she decided she would endure it—endure it without arguing against it—but her effort to do so was overwhelming and nearly broke her.

"He had judged me and condemned me," she said at last, "and therefore, as a matter of course, we were not such friends when we last met as we used to be before my marriage."

"He had judged me and condemned me," she finally said, "and so, naturally, we weren't as close when we last saw each other as we used to be before my marriage."

"But, Julia, there was much for which you owed him gratitude."

"But, Julia, there was a lot you should be grateful to him for."

"We will say nothing about that now, Hermy."

"We won't say anything about that right now, Hermy."

"I do not know why your mouth should be closed on such a subject because he has gone. I should have thought that you would be glad to acknowledge his kindness to you. But you were always hard."

"I don't understand why you’re being quiet about this since he’s gone. I would have thought you’d be happy to acknowledge the kindness he showed you. But you’ve always been tough."

"Perhaps I am hard."

"Maybe I'm tough."

"And twice he asked you to come here since you returned,—but you would not come."

"And twice he asked you to come here since you got back—but you wouldn't come."

"I have come now, Hermy, when I have thought that I might be of use."

"I've come now, Hermy, because I thought I might be helpful."

"He felt it when you would not come before. I know he did." Lady Ongar could not but think of the way in which he had manifested his feelings on the occasion of his visit to Bolton Street. "I never could understand why you were so bitter."

"He sensed it when you didn’t come before. I know he did." Lady Ongar couldn’t help but think about how he showed his feelings during his visit to Bolton Street. "I never understood why you were so bitter."

"I think, dear, we had better not discuss that. I also have had much to bear,—I, as well as you. What you have borne has come in no wise from your own fault."

"I think, dear, we should avoid talking about that. I've had my share of challenges too—just like you. What you've dealt with hasn't been your fault at all."

"No, indeed; I did not want him to go. I would have given anything to keep him at home."

"No, I really didn't want him to leave. I would have done anything to keep him at home."

Her sister had not been thinking of the suffering which had come to her from the loss of her husband, but of her former miseries. This, however, she did not explain. "No," Lady Ongar continued to say. "You have nothing for which to blame yourself, whereas I have much,—indeed everything. If we are to remain together, as I hope we may, it will be better for us both that bygones should be bygones."

Her sister wasn't thinking about the pain from losing her husband, but of her past struggles. She didn't share this, though. "No," Lady Ongar kept saying. "You have nothing to feel guilty about, but I have a lot—actually, everything. If we're going to stay together, which I really hope we do, it will be better for both of us if we let the past be the past."

"Do you mean that I am never to speak of Hugh?"

"Are you saying that I'm never supposed to mention Hugh?"

"No;—I by no means intend that. But I would rather that you should not refer to his feelings towards me. I think he did not quite understand the sort of life that I led while my husband was alive, and that he judged me amiss. Therefore I would have bygones be bygones."

"No; I definitely don't mean that. But I’d prefer if you didn’t talk about his feelings for me. I think he didn’t fully grasp the kind of life I lived while my husband was alive, and that he misjudged me. So, I’d like to let the past be the past."

Three or four days after this, when the question of leaving Clavering Park was being mooted, the elder sister started a difficulty as to money matters. An offer had been made to her by Mrs. Clavering to remain at the great house, but this she had declined, alleging that the place would be distasteful to her after her husband's death. She, poor soul, did not allege that it had been made distasteful to her for ever by the solitude which she had endured there during her husband's lifetime! She would go away somewhere, and live as best she might upon her jointure. It was not very much, but it would be sufficient. She did not see, she said, how she could live with her sister, because she did not wish to be dependent. Julia, of course, would live in a style to which she could make no pretence.

Three or four days later, when they were discussing leaving Clavering Park, the older sister brought up a problem regarding money. Mrs. Clavering had offered her the option to stay at the grand house, but she had turned it down, saying the place would feel wrong after her husband's death. She didn’t mention that the loneliness she experienced there during her husband's life had already made it unpleasant for her. She planned to go somewhere else and manage as best she could on her jointure. It wasn’t a lot, but it would be enough. She said she didn’t see how she could live with her sister because she didn’t want to be a burden. Of course, Julia would live in a way that she couldn't even try to match.

Mrs. Clavering, who was present,—as was also Lady Ongar,—declared that she saw no such difficulty. "Sisters together," she said, "need hardly think of a difference in such matters."

Mrs. Clavering, who was there—along with Lady Ongar—stated that she saw no problem at all. "Sisters together," she said, "should hardly worry about a difference in these things."

Then it was that Lady Ongar first spoke to either of them of her half-formed resolution about her money, and then too, for the first time, did she come down altogether from that high horse on which she had been, as it were, compelled to mount herself while in Mrs. Clavering's presence. "I think I must explain," said she, "something of what I mean to do,—about my money that is. I do not think that there will be much difference between me and Hermy in that respect."

Then Lady Ongar finally talked to either of them about her half-formed decision regarding her money, and for the first time, she completely came down from the high horse she had felt compelled to be on while in Mrs. Clavering's presence. "I think I should explain," she said, "a bit about what I plan to do—regarding my money, that is. I don’t think there will be much difference between me and Hermy in that regard."

"That is nonsense," said her sister, fretfully.

"That's nonsense," her sister said, annoyed.

"There will be a difference in income certainly," said Mrs. Clavering, "but I do not see that that need create any uncomfortable feeling."

"There will definitely be a difference in income," Mrs. Clavering said, "but I don't see why that should create any uncomfortable feelings."

"Only one doesn't like to be dependent," said Hermione.

"Only one doesn’t want to be dependent," said Hermione.

"You shall not be asked to give up any of your independence," said Julia, with a smile,—a melancholy smile, that gave but little sign of pleasantness within. Then on a sudden her face became stern and hard. "The fact is," she said, "I do not intend to keep Lord Ongar's money."

"You won’t be asked to give up any of your independence," Julia said with a smile—a sad smile that didn’t show much happiness inside. Then suddenly, her expression grew serious and tough. "The truth is," she continued, "I won’t be keeping Lord Ongar's money."

"Not to keep your income!" said Hermione.

"Don't hold onto your income!" said Hermione.

"No;—I will give it back to them,—or at least the greater part of it. Why should I keep it?"

"No; I’ll give it back to them — or at least most of it. Why should I keep it?"

"It is your own," said Mrs. Clavering.

"It belongs to you," said Mrs. Clavering.

"Yes; legally it is my own. I know that. And when there was some question whether it should not be disputed I would have fought for it to the last shilling. Somebody,—I suppose it was the lawyer,—wanted to keep from me the place in Surrey. I told them then that I would not abandon my right to an inch of it. But they yielded,—and now I have given them back the house."

"Yes; legally it’s mine. I know that. And when there was some question about whether it should be contested, I would have fought for it to my last penny. Someone—I guess it was the lawyer—wanted to keep the place in Surrey from me. I told them then that I wouldn’t give up my right to even an inch of it. But they gave in—and now I’ve returned the house to them."

"You have given it back!" said her sister.

"You gave it back!" said her sister.

"Yes;—I have said they may have it. It is of no use to me. I hate the place."

"Yeah; I've said they can have it. It’s useless to me. I hate that place."

"You have been very generous," said Mrs. Clavering.

"You've been really generous," said Mrs. Clavering.

"But that will not affect your income," said Hermione.

"But that won't affect your income," said Hermione.

"No;—that would not affect my income." Then she paused, not knowing how to go on with the story of her purpose.

"No; that wouldn’t affect my income." She paused, unsure how to continue with her story about her purpose.

"If I may say so, Lady Ongar," said Mrs. Clavering, "I would not, if I were you, take any steps in so important a matter without advice."

"If I may say so, Lady Ongar," Mrs. Clavering said, "I wouldn’t, if I were you, make any moves in such an important matter without some advice."

"Who is there that can advise me? Of course the lawyer tells me that I ought to keep it all. It is his business to give such advice as that. But what does he know of what I feel? How can he understand me? How, indeed, can I expect that any one shall understand me?"

"Who can help me? Of course, the lawyer says I should keep everything. That’s his job. But what does he know about how I feel? How can he truly understand me? How, really, can I expect anyone to understand me?"

"But it is possible that people should misunderstand you," said Mrs. Clavering.

"But it's possible that people might misunderstand you," Mrs. Clavering said.

"Exactly. That is just what he says. But, Mrs. Clavering, I care nothing for that. I care nothing for what anybody says or thinks. What is it to me what they say?"

"Exactly. That’s exactly what he says. But, Mrs. Clavering, I don’t care about that. I don’t care about what anyone says or thinks. What does it matter to me what they say?"

"I should have thought it was everything," said her sister.

"I should have thought it was everything," her sister said.

"No,—it is nothing;—nothing at all." Then she was again silent, and was unable to express herself. She could not bring herself to declare in words that self-condemnation of her own conduct which was now weighing so heavily upon her. It was not that she wished to keep back her own feelings, either from her sister or from Mrs. Clavering; but that the words in which to express them were wanting to her.

"No—it's nothing; really, nothing at all." Then she fell silent again, unable to find the words. She couldn't bring herself to say out loud the harsh judgment she had of her own actions, which was now pressing down on her. It wasn't that she wanted to hide her feelings from her sister or Mrs. Clavering; it was just that she lacked the words to express them.

"And have they accepted the house?" Mrs. Clavering asked.

"And have they accepted the house?" Mrs. Clavering asked.

"They must accept it. What else can they do? They cannot make me call it mine if I do not choose. If I refuse to take the income which Mr. Courton's lawyer pays in to my bankers', they cannot compel me to have it."

"They have to accept it. What else can they do? They can't force me to call it mine if I don't want to. If I refuse to take the money that Mr. Courton's lawyer pays into my bank, they can't make me accept it."

"But you are not going to give that up too?" said her sister.

"But you’re not going to give that up too, are you?" her sister said.

"I am. I will not have his money,—not more than enough to keep me from being a scandal to his family. I will not have it. It is a curse to me, and has been from the first. What right have I to all that money, because,—because,—because—" She could not finish her sentence, but turned away from them, and walked by herself to the window.

"I am. I won't take his money—just enough to keep me from being a disgrace to his family. I won't take it. It's a burden to me, and it always has been. What right do I have to all that money, just because—because—because—" She couldn't finish her sentence, turned away from them, and walked by herself to the window.

Lady Clavering looked at Mrs. Clavering as though she thought that her sister was mad. "Do you understand her?" said Lady Clavering in a whisper.

Lady Clavering looked at Mrs. Clavering as if she believed her sister was crazy. "Do you get her?" Lady Clavering asked in a whisper.

"I think I do," said the other. "I think I know what is passing in her mind." Then she followed Lady Ongar across the room, and taking her gently by the arm tried to comfort her,—to comfort her, and to argue with her as to the rashness of that which she proposed to do. She endeavoured to explain to the poor woman how it was that she should at this moment be wretched, and anxious to do that which, if done, would put it out of her power afterwards to make herself useful in the world. It shocked the prudence of Mrs. Clavering,—this idea of abandoning money, the possession of which was questioned by no one. "They do not want it, Lady Ongar," she said.

"I think I do," said the other. "I believe I understand what’s going through her mind." Then she followed Lady Ongar across the room and gently took her by the arm, trying to comfort her—both to console her and to discuss the recklessness of what she was considering doing. She attempted to explain to the troubled woman why she should feel so miserable at this moment and why she was eager to take an action that, if she went through with it, would prevent her from being able to contribute to the world later on. The thought of giving up money, something that no one questioned the legitimacy of, shocked Mrs. Clavering's sense of prudence. "They don’t need it, Lady Ongar," she said.

"That has nothing to do with it," answered the other.

"That has nothing to do with it," replied the other.

"And nobody has any suspicion but what it is honourably and fairly your own."

"And no one suspects anything other than that it's honestly and fairly yours."

"But does anybody ever think how I got it?" said Lady Ongar, turning sharply round upon Mrs. Clavering. "You,—you,—you,—do you dare to tell me what you think of the way in which it became mine? Could you bear it, if it had become yours after such a fashion? I cannot bear it, and I will not." She was now speaking with so much violence that her sister was awed into silence, and Mrs. Clavering herself found a difficulty in answering her.

"But does anyone ever think about how I got it?" Lady Ongar said, spinning around to face Mrs. Clavering. "You—do you really dare to tell me what you think about how it came to me? Could you handle it if it had ended up in your hands the same way? I can't handle it, and I won't." She was speaking so passionately now that her sister fell silent, and even Mrs. Clavering struggled to respond.

"Whatever may have been the past," said she, "the question now is how to do the best for the future."

"Whatever happened in the past," she said, "the important thing now is how to make the best choices for the future."

"I had hoped," continued Lady Ongar without noticing what was said to her, "I had hoped to make everything straight by giving his money to another. You know to whom I mean, and so does Hermy. I thought, when I returned, that bad as I had been I might still do some good in the world. But it is as they tell us in the sermons. One cannot make good come out of evil. I have done evil, and nothing but evil has come from the evil which I have done. Nothing but evil will come from it. As for being useful in the world,—I know of what use I am! When women hear how wretched I have been they will be unwilling to sell themselves as I did." Then she made her way to the door, and left the room, going out with quiet steps, and closing the lock behind her without a sound.

"I had hoped," Lady Ongar continued, oblivious to what was being said to her, "I had hoped to set things right by giving his money to someone else. You know who I mean, and so does Hermy. I thought that when I came back, despite my past mistakes, I might still be able to do some good in the world. But it's like they say in the sermons. You can’t bring good out of evil. I’ve done wrong, and only bad things have come from the wrong I’ve done. Only bad things will come from it. As for being of any use in the world—I know what my worth is! When women hear how miserable my life has been, they’ll be less likely to sell themselves the way I did." Then she walked to the door, exited the room quietly, and locked it behind her without a sound.

"I did not know that she was such as that," said Mrs. Clavering.

"I didn't know she was like that," said Mrs. Clavering.

"Nor did I. She has never spoken in that way before."

"Neither did I. She's never talked like that before."

"Poor soul! Hermione, you see there are those in the world whose sufferings are worse than yours."

"Poor thing! Hermione, you see, there are people in the world whose pain is greater than yours."

"I don't know," said Lady Clavering. "She never lost what I have lost,—never."

"I don’t know," Lady Clavering said. "She never lost what I’ve lost—never."

"She has lost what I am sure you never will lose, her own self-esteem. But, Hermy, you should be good to her. We must all be good to her. Will it not be better that you should stay with us for a while,—both of you?"

"She has lost something that I’m sure you will never lose, her self-esteem. But, Hermy, you should be kind to her. We all need to be kind to her. Wouldn’t it be better if both of you stayed with us for a while?"

"What, here at the park?"

"What, at the park?"

"We will make room for you at the rectory, if you would like it."

"We can make space for you at the rectory, if you want."

"Oh, no; I will go away. I shall be better away. I suppose she will not be like that often; will she?"

"Oh, no; I'm going to leave. I’ll be better off away. I guess she won't be like that very often; will she?"

"She was much moved just now."

"She was really moved just now."

"And what does she mean about her income? She cannot be in earnest."

"And what does she mean about her income? She can't be serious."

"She is in earnest now."

"She is serious now."

"And cannot it be prevented? Only think,—if after all she were to give up her jointure! Mrs. Clavering, you do not think she is mad; do you?"

"And can't it be stopped? Just think—what if she actually decided to give up her jointure! Mrs. Clavering, you don’t really believe she’s crazy, do you?"

Mrs. Clavering said what she could to comfort the elder and weaker sister on this subject, explaining to her that the Courtons would not be at all likely to take advantage of any wild generosity on the part of Lady Ongar, and then she walked home across the park, meditating on the character of the two sisters.

Mrs. Clavering said what she could to comfort the older and more vulnerable sister on this topic, explaining to her that the Courtons were unlikely to take advantage of any wild generosity from Lady Ongar. Then she walked home through the park, reflecting on the personalities of the two sisters.

 

 

CHAPTER XLVI.

MADAME GORDELOUP RETIRES FROM BRITISH DIPLOMACY.

The reader must be asked to accompany me once more to that room in Mount Street in which poor Archie practised diplomacy, and whither the courageous Doodles was carried prisoner in those moments in which he was last seen of us. The Spy was now sitting alone before her desk, scribbling with all her energy,—writing letters on foreign policy, no doubt, to all the courts of Europe, but especially to that Russian court to which her services were more especially due. She was hard at work, when there came the sound of a step upon the stairs. The practised ear of the Spy became erect, and she at once knew who was her visitor. It was not one with whom diplomacy would much avail, or who was likely to have money ready under his glove for her behoof. "Ah, Edouard, is that you? I am glad you have come," she said, as Count Pateroff entered the room.

TThe reader is invited to join me once again in that room on Mount Street where poor Archie practiced diplomacy, and where the brave Doodles was taken as a prisoner during the last moments we saw him. The Spy was sitting alone at her desk, writing with great focus—no doubt drafting letters about foreign policy to all the courts of Europe, especially to the Russian court that relied on her services the most. She was fully engaged in her work when she heard a step on the stairs. The Spy's trained ear perked up, and she immediately recognized her visitor. It wasn't someone with whom diplomacy would do much good, nor someone likely to have cash ready for her. "Ah, Edouard, is that you? I'm glad you're here," she said as Count Pateroff entered the room.

"Yes, it is I. I got your note yesterday."

"Yes, it's me. I got your note yesterday."

"You are good,—very good. You are always good." Sophie as she said this went on very rapidly with her letter,—so rapidly that her hand seemed to run about the paper wildly. Then she flung down her pen, and folded the paper on which she had been writing with marvellous quickness. There was an activity about the woman, in all her movements, which was wonderful to watch. "There," she said, "that is done; now we can talk. Ah! I have nearly written off my fingers this morning." Her brother smiled, but said nothing about the letters. He never allowed himself to allude in any way to her professional duties.

"You’re great—really great. You’re always great." As she said this, Sophie quickly continued with her letter—so quickly that her hand seemed to race across the paper. Then she dropped her pen and folded the page she had been writing on with incredible speed. There was a lively energy to the way she moved that was mesmerizing to watch. "There! That’s done; now we can talk. Oh! I nearly wrote my fingers off this morning." Her brother smiled but didn’t mention the letters. He never brought up her work in any way.

"So you are going to St. Petersburg?" he said.

"So you’re heading to St. Petersburg?" he said.

"Well,—yes, I think. Why should I remain here spending money with both hands and through the nose?" At this idea, the brother again smiled pleasantly. He had never seen his sister to be culpably extravagant as she now described herself. "Nothing to get and everything to lose," she went on saying.

"Well, yes, I think so. Why should I stick around wasting money like crazy?" At this thought, the brother smiled again. He had never seen his sister as recklessly extravagant as she was describing herself. "Nothing to gain and everything to lose," she continued.

"You know your own affairs best," he answered.

"You know your own business better," he replied.

"Yes; I know my own affairs. If I remained here, I should be taken away to that black building there;" and she pointed in the direction of the workhouse, which fronts so gloomily upon Mount Street. "You would not come to take me out."

"Yes; I know my own situation. If I stayed here, I'd be taken to that dark building over there," she said, pointing toward the workhouse, which looks so grim from Mount Street. "You wouldn't come to get me out."

The count smiled again. "You are too clever for that, Sophie, I think."

The count smiled again. "I think you're too smart for that, Sophie."

"Ah, it is well for a woman to be clever, or she must starve,—yes, starve! Such a one as I must starve in this accursed country, if I were not what you call, clever." The brother and sister were talking in French, and she spoke now almost as rapidly as she had written. "They are beasts and fools, and as awkward as bulls,—yes, as bulls. I hate them. I hate them all. Men, women, children,—they are all alike. Look at the street out there. Though it is summer, I shiver when I look out at its blackness. It is the ugliest nation! And they understand nothing. Oh, how I hate them!"

"Ah, it’s good for a woman to be smart, or she’ll end up starving—yes, starving! Someone like me would starve in this cursed country if I weren’t what you call smart." The brother and sister were speaking in French, and she was now talking almost as quickly as she had written. "They’re beasts and fools, and as clumsy as bulls—yes, like bulls. I hate them. I hate them all. Men, women, children—they’re all the same. Look at the street out there. Even though it’s summer, I shiver when I see its darkness. It’s the ugliest country! And they don’t understand anything. Oh, how I hate them!"

"They are not without merit. They have got money."

"They're not without value. They have money."

"Money,—yes. They have got money; and they are so stupid, you may take it from under their eyes. They will not see you. But of their own hearts, they will give you nothing. You see that black building,—the workhouse. I call it Little England. It is just the same. The naked, hungry, poor wretches lie at the door, and the great fat beadles swell about like turkey-cocks inside."

"Money—yes. They've got money, and they're so oblivious, you can take it right in front of them. They won't even notice. But from their own hearts, they won't give you anything. You see that dark building—the workhouse? I call it Little England. It's exactly the same. The naked, hungry, poor souls are lying at the door, while the big, bloated officials strut around inside like proud turkeys."

"You have been here long enough to know, at any rate."

"You've been here long enough to know, anyway."

"Yes; I have been here long,—too long. I have made my life a wilderness, staying here in this country of barracks. And what have I got for it? I came back because of that woman, and she has thrown me over. That is your fault,—yours,—yours!"

"Yeah; I've been here too long. I've turned my life into a wasteland by staying in this place full of barracks. And what do I have to show for it? I came back for that woman, and she dumped me. That’s your fault—yours—yours!"

"And you have sent for me to tell me that again?"

"And you called me to tell me that again?"

"No, Edouard. I sent for you that you might see your sister once more,—that I might once more see my brother." This she said leaning forward on the table, on which her arms rested, and looking steadfastly into his face with eyes moist,—just moist, with a tear in each. Whether Edouard was too unfeeling to be moved by this show of affection, or whether he gave more credit to his sister's histrionic powers than to those of her heart, I will not say; but he was altogether irresponsive to her appeal. "You will be back again before long," he said.

"No, Edouard. I called for you so you could see your sister one more time—and so I could see my brother again." She said this while leaning forward on the table, her arms resting on it, and looking intently into his face, her eyes slightly moist—with a tear in each. Whether Edouard was too cold to be affected by her display of emotion or whether he believed more in her acting skills than in her true feelings, I can’t say; but he didn't respond to her plea at all. "You'll be back soon," he said.

"Never! I shall come back to this accursed country never again. No; I am going once and for all. I will soil myself with the mud of its gutters no more. I came for the sake of Julie; and now,—how has she treated me?" Edouard shrugged his shoulders. "And you,—how has she treated you?"

"Never! I will never come back to this cursed country. No; I am leaving for good. I won't dirty myself with the filth of its streets anymore. I came for Julie, and now—how has she treated me?" Edouard shrugged his shoulders. "And you—how has she treated you?"

"Never mind me."

"Don't worry about me."

"Ah, but I must mind you. Only that you would not let me manage, it might be yours now,—yes, all. Why did you come down to that accursed island?"

"Ah, but I have to remind you. If only you had let me take charge, it could have all been yours now—yes, everything. Why did you come to that cursed island?"

"It was my way to play my game. Leave that alone, Sophie." And there came a frown over the brother's brow.

"It was my way to play my game. Leave that alone, Sophie." And a frown appeared on the brother's face.

"Your way to play your game! Yes; and what has become of mine? You have destroyed mine; but you think nothing of that. After all that I have gone through, to have nothing; and through you,—my brother! Ah, that is the hardest of all,—when I was putting all things in train for you!"

"Your way of playing your game! Yes; but what happened to mine? You’ve ruined mine, but you don't care. After everything I've been through, to end up with nothing; because of you—my brother! Ah, that’s the toughest part of all—when I was arranging everything for you!"

"You are always putting things in train. Leave your trains alone, where I am concerned."

"You always have things in motion. Just leave your plans out of my business."

"But why did you come to that place in the accursed island? I am ruined by that journey. Yes; I am ruined. You will not help me to get a shilling from her,—not even for my expenses."

"But why did you go to that place on the cursed island? That trip has ruined me. Yes, I’m ruined. You won't help me get a penny from her— not even to cover my expenses."

"Certainly not. You are clever enough to do your own work without my aid."

"Definitely not. You're smart enough to handle your own tasks without my help."

"And is that all from a brother? Well! And now that they have drowned themselves,—the two Claverings,—the fool and the brute; and she can do what she pleases—"

"And is that all from a brother? Well! And now that they have drowned themselves—the two Claverings—the idiot and the jerk; and she can do whatever she wants—"

"She could always do as she pleased since Lord Ongar died."

"She could do whatever she wanted ever since Lord Ongar passed away."

"Yes; but she is more lonely than ever now. That cousin who is the greatest fool of all, who might have had everything,—mon Dieu! yes, everything;—she would have given it all to him with a sweep of her hand, if he would have taken it. He is to marry himself to a little brown girl, who has not a shilling. No one but an Englishman could make follies so abominable as these. Ah, I am sick,—I am sick when I remember it!" And Sophie gave unmistakeable signs of a grief which could hardly have been self-interested. But in truth she suffered pain at seeing a good game spoilt. It was not that she had any wish for Harry Clavering's welfare. Had he gone to the bottom of the sea in the same boat with his cousins, the tidings of his fate would have been pleasurable to her rather than otherwise. But when she saw such cards thrown away as he had held in his hand, she encountered that sort of suffering which a good player feels when he sits behind the chair of one who plays up to his adversary's trump, and makes no tricks of his own kings and aces.

"Yes, but she's lonelier than ever now. That cousin, the biggest fool of all, who could have had everything—oh my God, yes, everything—she would have given it all to him with a wave of her hand if he had wanted it. Instead, he's going to marry a little brown girl who has not a penny to her name. No one but an Englishman could make such dreadful mistakes. Ah, it makes me sick—it really makes me sick when I think about it!" And Sophie showed clear signs of grief that didn’t seem to be about her own interests. But the truth is, she felt pain at seeing a good opportunity wasted. It wasn't that she cared about Harry Clavering's happiness. If he had drowned at sea along with his cousins, she would have found that news more enjoyable than upsetting. But when she saw such great cards being thrown away, she felt that kind of pain that a good player experiences when watching someone play into their opponent's trump instead of making tricks with their own kings and aces.

"He may marry himself to the devil, if he please;—it is nothing to me," said the count.

"He can marry the devil if he wants; it’s nothing to me," said the count.

"But she is there;—by herself,—at that place;—what is it called? Ten—bie. Will you not go now, when you can do no harm?"

"But she’s there—alone—at that spot; what is it called? Ten—bie. Won’t you go now, when you can't cause any trouble?"

"No; I will not go now."

"No, I'm not going now."

"And in a year she will have taken some other one for her husband."

"And in a year, she will have married someone else."

"What is that to me? But look here, Sophie, for you may as well understand me at once. If I were ever to think of Lady Ongar again as my wife, I should not tell you."

"What does that matter to me? But listen, Sophie, you might as well get it straight from the start. If I were ever to consider Lady Ongar as my wife again, I wouldn’t tell you."

"And why not tell me,—your sister?"

"And why not tell me, your sister?"

"Because it would do me no good. If you had not been there she would have been my wife now."

"Because it wouldn't benefit me at all. If you hadn't been there, she would be my wife right now."

"Edouard!"

"Edouard!"

"What I say is true. But I do not want to reproach you because of that. Each of us was playing his own game; and your game was not my game. You are going now, and if I play my game again I can play it alone."

"What I'm saying is true. But I don’t want to blame you for it. We were both playing our own games, and your game wasn’t mine. You’re leaving now, and if I play my game again, I can do it by myself."

Upon hearing this Sophie sat awhile in silence, looking at him. "You will play it alone?" she said at last. "You would rather do that?"

Upon hearing this, Sophie sat in silence for a moment, watching him. "You'll play it solo?" she finally said. "You'd prefer that?"

"Much rather, if I play any game at all."

"Actually, I’d prefer to play a game at all."

"And you will give me something to go?"

"And will you give me something to take with me?"

"Not one sou."

"Not a single cent."

"You will not;—not a sou?"

"You won't;—not a penny?"

"Not half a sou,—for you to go or stay. Sophie, are you not a fool to ask me for money?"

"Not a penny,—for you to go or stay. Sophie, are you really foolish enough to ask me for money?"

"And you are a fool,—a fool who knows nothing. You need not look at me like that. I am not afraid. I shall remain here. I shall stay and do as the lawyer tells me. He says that if I bring my action she must pay me for my expenses. I will bring my action. I am not going to leave it all to you. No. Do you remember those days in Florence? I have not been paid yet, but I will be paid. One hundred and seventy-five thousand francs a year,—and after all I am to have none of it! Say;—should it become yours, will you do something for your sister?"

"And you're an idiot—a total idiot who knows nothing. You don't need to look at me that way. I'm not scared. I'm staying right here. I'm going to do what the lawyer says. He told me that if I take legal action, she has to cover my expenses. I'm going to take legal action. I'm not just going to leave it all up to you. No. Do you remember those days in Florence? I still haven't been paid, but I will get my money. One hundred and seventy-five thousand francs a year—and yet I'm going to get none of it! Let me ask you this—if it becomes yours, will you do something for your sister?"

"Nothing at all;—nothing. Sophie, do you think I am fool enough to bargain in such a matter?"

"Nothing at all;—nothing. Sophie, do you really think I'm foolish enough to negotiate over something like this?"

"Then I will stay. Yes;—I will bring my action. All the world shall hear, and they shall know how you have destroyed me and yourself. Ah;—you think I am afraid; that I will not spend my money. I will spend all,—all,—all; and I will be revenged."

"Then I’ll stay. Yes;—I’ll take action. The whole world will hear, and they’ll know how you’ve ruined me and yourself. Ah;—you think I’m scared; that I won’t spend my money. I’ll spend everything,—everything,—everything; and I will get my revenge."

"You may go or stay; it is the same thing to me. Now, if you please, I will take my leave." And he got up from his chair to leave her.

"You can go or stay; it doesn't matter to me. Now, if you don't mind, I'll take my leave." And he stood up from his chair to leave her.

"It is the same thing to you?"

"It is the same for you?"

"Quite the same."

"Exactly the same."

"Then I will stay, and she shall hear my name every day of her life;—every hour. She shall be so sick of me and of you, that,—that—that— Oh, Edouard!" This last appeal was made to him because he was already at the door, and could not be stopped in any other way.

"Then I'll stick around, and she'll hear my name every day of her life—every hour. She'll get so fed up with me and with you that—oh, Edouard!" This last plea was directed at him because he was already at the door and couldn’t be stopped any other way.

"What else have you to say, my sister?"

"What else do you want to say, my sister?"

"Oh, Edouard, what would I not give to see all those riches yours? Has it not been my dearest wish? Edouard, you are ungrateful. All men are ungrateful." Now, having succeeded in stopping him, she buried her face in the corner of the sofa and wept plentifully. It must be presumed that her acting before her brother must have been altogether thrown away; but the acting was, nevertheless, very good.

"Oh, Edouard, what wouldn’t I give to see all your riches? Isn’t it my greatest wish? Edouard, you're so ungrateful. Men are all ungrateful." Now, having managed to stop him, she buried her face in the corner of the sofa and cried a lot. It's likely her performance in front of her brother was completely wasted; yet, the acting was still really good.

"If you are in truth going to St. Petersburg," he said, "I will bid you adieu now. If not,—au revoir."

"If you really are going to St. Petersburg," he said, "I'll say goodbye now. If not,—see you later."

"I am going. Yes, Edouard, I am. I cannot bear this country longer. My heart is being torn to pieces. All my affections are outraged. Yes, I am going;—perhaps on Monday;—perhaps on Monday week. But I go in truth. My brother, adieu." Then she got up, and putting a hand on each of his shoulders, lifted up her face to be kissed. He embraced her in the manner proposed, and turned to leave her. But before he went she made to him one other petition, holding him by the arm as she did so. "Edouard, you can lend me twenty napoleons till I am at St. Petersburg?"

"I’m leaving. Yes, Edouard, I am. I can't stand this country any longer. My heart is breaking. Everything I care about is being hurt. Yes, I’m going—maybe on Monday; maybe the Monday after that. But I'm definitely going. My brother, goodbye." Then she stood up, placed a hand on each of his shoulders, and lifted her face to be kissed. He embraced her as she intended, then turned to leave. But before he left, she made one more request, holding onto his arm as she did. "Edouard, could you lend me twenty napoleons until I get to St. Petersburg?"

"No, Sophie; no."

"No, Sophie; no."

"Not lend your sister twenty napoleons!"

"Don't lend your sister twenty napoleons!"

"No, Sophie. I never lend money. It is a rule."

"No, Sophie. I never lend money. It's a rule."

"Will you give me five? I am so poor. I have almost nothing."

"Can you spare five bucks? I'm really broke. I have nearly nothing."

"Things are not so bad with you as that, I hope?"

"Things aren't as bad with you as that, I hope?"

"Ah, yes; they are very bad. Since I have been in this accursed city,—now, this time, what have I got? Nothing,—nothing. She was to be all in all to me,—and she has given me nothing! It is very bad to be so poor. Say that you will give me five napoleons;—O my brother!" She was still hanging by his arm, and, as she did so, she looked up into his face with tears in her eyes. As he regarded her, bending down his face over hers, a slight smile came upon his countenance. Then he put his hand into his pocket, and taking out his purse, handed to her five sovereigns.

"Ah, yes; they are really terrible. Since I’ve been in this cursed city—what do I have this time? Nothing—absolutely nothing. She was supposed to mean everything to me, and yet she’s given me nothing! It’s really hard to be this poor. Just say you’ll give me five napoleons—oh my brother!" She was still clinging to his arm, and as she did, she looked up at him with tears in her eyes. As he looked down at her, a faint smile appeared on his face. Then he reached into his pocket, took out his wallet, and handed her five sovereigns.

"Only five?" she said.

"Only five?" she asked.

"Only five," he answered.

"Just five," he replied.

"A thousand thanks, O my brother." Then she kissed him again, and after that he went. She accompanied him to the top of the stairs, and from thence showered blessings on his head, till she heard the lock of the door closed behind him. When he was altogether gone she unlocked an inner drawer in her desk, and, taking out an uncompleted rouleau of gold, added her brother's sovereigns thereto. The sum he had given her was exactly wanted to make up the required number of twenty-five. She counted them half-a-dozen times, to be quite sure, and then rolled them carefully in paper, and sealed the little packet at each end. "Ah," she said, speaking to herself, "they are very nice. Nothing else English is nice, but only these." There were many rolls of money there before her in the drawer of the desk;—some ten, perhaps, or twelve. These she took out one after another, passing them lovingly through her fingers, looking at the little seals at the ends of each, weighing them in her hand as though to make sure that no wrong had been done to them in her absence, standing them up one against another to see that they were of the same length. We may be quite sure that Sophie Gordeloup brought no sovereigns with her to England when she came over with Lady Ongar after the earl's death, and that the hoard before her contained simply the plunder which she had collected during this her latest visit to the "accursed" country which she was going to leave.

"A thousand thanks, my brother." Then she kissed him again, and after that, he left. She walked him to the top of the stairs and showered blessings on him until she heard the door lock behind him. Once he was completely gone, she unlocked an inner drawer in her desk and took out an incomplete roll of gold, adding her brother's coins to it. The amount he gave her was just what she needed to reach the required total of twenty-five. She counted them six times to be sure, then carefully rolled them in paper and sealed the little packet at both ends. "Ah," she said to herself, "they're very nice. Nothing else English is nice, but only these." There were many rolls of money in the drawer before her—maybe ten or twelve. She took them out one by one, lovingly running her fingers over them, checking the little seals at each end, weighing them in her hand as if to ensure they hadn’t been harmed in her absence, standing them up next to each other to make sure they were the same length. We can be certain that Sophie Gordeloup didn’t bring any sovereigns with her to England when she arrived with Lady Ongar after the earl's death, and that the stash in front of her contained only the treasures she had collected during her recent trip to the "cursed" country she was about to leave.

But before she started she was resolved to make one more attempt upon that mine of wealth which, but a few weeks ago, had seemed to be open before her. She had learned from the servants in Bolton Street that Lady Ongar was with Lady Clavering, at Clavering Park, and she addressed a letter to her there. This letter she wrote in English, and she threw into her appeal all the pathos of which she was capable.—
 

But before she began, she decided to make one last effort to tap into that source of riches that had seemed accessible just a few weeks earlier. She found out from the staff in Bolton Street that Lady Ongar was with Lady Clavering at Clavering Park, so she sent her a letter there. She wrote the letter in English and poured all the emotion she could muster into her plea.

Mount Street, October, 186—.

Mount Street, October, 186—.

Dearest Julie,—I do not think you would wish me to go away from this country for ever,—for ever, without one word of farewell to her I love so fondly. Yes; I have loved you with all my heart,—and now I am going away,—for ever. Shall we not meet each other once, and have one embrace? No trouble will be too much to me for that. No journey will be too long. Only say, Sophie, come to your Julie.

Dearest Julie,—I don’t think you would want me to leave this country for good—without even saying goodbye to the one I love so much. Yes; I have loved you with all my heart—and now I’m leaving—for good. Can we not see each other just once, and share one last embrace? I’d do anything for that. No distance is too great. Just say, Sophie, come to your Julie.

I must go, because I am so poor. Yes; I cannot live longer here without having the means. I am not ashamed to say to my Julie, who is rich, that I am poor. No; nor would I be ashamed to wait on my Julie like a slave if she would let me. My Julie was angry with me, because of my brother! Was it my fault that he came upon us in our little retreat, where we was so happy? Oh, no. I told him not to come. I knew his coming was for nothing,—nothing at all. I knew where was the heart of my Julie!—my poor Julie! But he was not worth that heart, and the pearl was thrown before a pig. But my brother—! Ah, he has ruined me. Why am I separated from my Julie but for him? Well; I can go away, and in my own countries there are those who will not wish to be separated from Sophie Gordeloup.

I have to leave because I’m really struggling financially. I can’t stay here any longer without money. I’m not ashamed to tell my Julie, who is wealthy, that I’m broke. No; I wouldn’t mind working for my Julie if she would allow it. My Julie was upset with me because of my brother! Was it my fault that he showed up while we were in our little escape, where we were so happy? Oh, no. I told him not to come. I knew his visit was pointless—absolutely pointless. I knew where Julie’s heart was!—my poor Julie! But he didn’t deserve that heart, and the treasure was wasted on a fool. But my brother—! Ah, he has ruined me. Why am I away from my Julie if not because of him? Well; I can leave, and in my own country, there are people who wouldn’t want to be apart from Sophie Gordeloup.

May I now tell my Julie in what condition is her poor friend? She will remember how it was that my feet brought me to England,—to England, to which I had said farewell for ever,—to England, where people must be rich like my Julie before they can eat and drink. I thought nothing then but of my Julie. I stopped not on the road to make merchandise,—what you call a bargain,—about my coming. No; I came at once, leaving all things,—my little affairs,—in confusion, because my Julie wanted me to come! It was in the winter. Oh, that winter! My poor bones shall never forget it. They are racked still with the pains which your savage winds have given them. And now it is autumn. Ten months have I been here, and I have eaten up my little substance. Oh, Julie, you, who are so rich, do not know what is the poverty of your Sophie!

May I now tell my Julie how her poor friend is doing? She will remember how my feet brought me to England—this England, which I thought I had said goodbye to forever—where you have to be as wealthy as my Julie just to eat and drink. Back then, I only thought about my Julie. I didn’t stop along the way to haggle about my arrival. No; I came straight here, leaving everything—my little affairs—in a mess, just because my Julie wanted me to come! It was winter. Oh, that winter! My poor bones will never forget it. They're still aching from the pain your harsh winds have caused. And now it’s autumn. I’ve been here for ten months, and I’ve spent all my little savings. Oh, Julie, you, who are so rich, do not know what poverty means for your Sophie!

A lawyer have told me,—not a French lawyer, but an English,—that somebody should pay me everything. He says the law would give it me. He have offered me the money himself,—just to let him make an action. But I have said,—No. No; Sophie will not have an action with her Julie. She would scorn that; and so the lawyer went away. But if my Julie will think of this, and will remember her Sophie,—how much she have expended, and now at last there is nothing left. She must go and beg among her friends. And why? Because she have loved her Julie too well. You, who are so rich, would miss it not at all. What would two,—three hundred pounds be to my Julie?

A lawyer told me—not a French lawyer, but an English one—that someone should pay me everything. He says the law would grant it to me. He even offered me the money himself—just to let him file a claim. But I said, “No. No; Sophie won’t file a claim against her Julie. She would look down on that,” and so the lawyer left. But if my Julie thinks about this and remembers her Sophie—how much she has spent, and now at last there’s nothing left. She has to go and beg among her friends. And why? Because she has loved her Julie too much. You, who are so wealthy, wouldn’t even notice it. What would two or three hundred pounds mean to my Julie?

Shall I come to you? Say so; say so, and I will go at once, if I did crawl on my knees. Oh, what a joy to see my Julie! And do not think I will trouble you about money. No; your Sophie will be too proud for that. Not a word will I say, but to love you. Nothing will I do, but to print one kiss on my Julie's forehead, and then to retire for ever; asking God's blessing for her dear head.

Shall I come to you? Just say the word, and I'll go right away, even if it means crawling on my knees. Oh, what a joy it would be to see my Julie! And don’t worry, I won’t ask you for money. No; your Sophie is too proud for that. I won’t say anything except that I love you. All I want to do is give my Julie a kiss on her forehead, and then step back for good, asking God to bless her dear head.

Thine,—always thine,

Thine,—always thine,

Sophie.
 

Sophie.

Lady Ongar, when she received this letter, was a little perplexed by it, not feeling quite sure in what way she might best answer it. It was the special severity of her position that there was no one to whom, in such difficulties, she could apply for advice. Of one thing she was quite sure,—that, willingly, she would never again see her devoted Sophie. And she knew that the woman deserved no money from her; that she had deserved none, but had received much. Every assertion in her letter was false. No one had wished her to come, and the expense of her coming had been paid for her over and over again. Lady Ongar knew that she had money,—and knew also that she would have had immediate recourse to law, if any lawyer would have suggested to her with a probability of success that he could get more for her. No doubt she had been telling her story to some attorney, in the hope that money might thus be extracted, and had been dragging her Julie's name through the mud, telling all she knew of that wretched Florentine story. As to all that Lady Ongar had no doubt; and yet she wished to send the woman money!

Lady Ongar, when she received this letter, felt a bit confused about how to respond. The tough part of her situation was that there was no one she could turn to for advice in such difficulties. One thing she was certain of is that she would never willingly see her devoted Sophie again. She also knew the woman didn’t deserve any money from her; she hadn’t earned it, yet had received plenty. Every claim in her letter was false. No one had asked her to come, and all the costs associated with her arrival had been covered multiple times. Lady Ongar was aware that she had money—and she knew she could have immediately sought legal action if any lawyer had suggested he could get her more. No doubt she had been telling her story to some attorney in hopes of extracting money, dragging Julie's name through the mud while recounting everything she knew about that terrible Florentine affair. Lady Ongar had no doubt about all that; still, she wanted to send the woman money!

There are services for which one is ready to give almost any amount of money payment,—if only one can be sure that that money payment will be taken as sufficient recompence for the service in question. Sophie Gordeloup had been useful. She had been very disagreeable,—but she had been useful. She had done things which nobody else could have done, and she had done her work well. That she had been paid for her work over and over again, there was no doubt; but Lady Ongar was willing to give her yet further payment, if only there might be an end of it. But she feared to do this, dreading the nature and cunning of the little woman,—lest she should take such payment as an acknowledgment of services for which secret compensation must be made,—and should then proceed to further threats. Thinking much of all this, Julie at last wrote to her Sophie as follows:—
 

There are services that people are willing to pay almost any amount for—if only they can be sure that payment will be seen as enough for the service provided. Sophie Gordeloup had been helpful. She had been very difficult—but she had been helpful. She had accomplished tasks that no one else could have done, and she had done her job well. There was no doubt that she had been paid for her work many times; however, Lady Ongar was ready to offer her more payment if it would finally put an end to things. But she was afraid to do this, fearing the nature and cleverness of the little woman—worried that Sophie would see such payment as an acknowledgment of services for which secret compensation must be given—and might then go on to make further threats. After thinking about all this, Julie eventually wrote to her Sophie as follows:—

Lady Ongar presents her compliments to Madame Gordeloup, and must decline to see Madame Gordeloup again after what has passed. Lady Ongar is very sorry to hear that Madame Gordeloup is in want of funds. Whatever assistance Lady Ongar might have been willing to afford, she now feels that she is prohibited from giving any by the allusion which Madame Gordeloup has made to legal advice. If Madame Gordeloup has legal demands on Lady Ongar which are said by a lawyer to be valid, Lady Ongar would strongly recommend Madame Gordeloup to enforce them.

Lady Ongar sends her regards to Madame Gordeloup and must decline to meet again after what has happened. Lady Ongar is truly sorry to hear that Madame Gordeloup is in need of money. While Lady Ongar might have been willing to help, she now feels she can't offer any assistance because of Madame Gordeloup's mention of legal advice. If Madame Gordeloup has valid legal claims against Lady Ongar according to a lawyer, Lady Ongar highly recommends that Madame Gordeloup pursue them.

Clavering Park, October, 186—.
 

Clavering Park, October, 186—.

This she wrote, acting altogether on her own judgment, and sent off by return of post. She almost wept at her own cruelty after the letter was gone, and greatly doubted her own discretion. But of whom could she have asked advice? Could she have told all the story of Madame Gordeloup to the rector or to the rector's wife? The letter no doubt was a discreet letter; but she greatly doubted her own discretion, and when she received her Sophie's rejoinder, she hardly dared to break the envelope.

This she wrote completely on her own judgment and sent off right away. She almost cried over her own harshness after the letter was gone and seriously questioned her judgment. But who could she have asked for advice? Could she have shared the whole story about Madame Gordeloup with the rector or his wife? The letter was definitely a careful one, but she greatly doubted her own judgment, and when she got Sophie's reply, she hardly dared to open the envelope.

Poor Sophie! Her Julie's letter nearly broke her heart. For sincerity little credit was due to her;—but some little was perhaps due. That she should be called Madame Gordeloup, and have compliments presented to her by the woman,—by the countess with whom and with whose husband she had been on such closely familiar terms, did in truth wound some tender feelings within her bosom. Such love as she had been able to give, she had given to her Julie. That she had always been willing to rob her Julie, to make a milch-cow of her Julie, to sell her Julie, to threaten her Julie, to quarrel with her Julie if aught might be done in that way,—to expose her Julie; nay, to destroy her Julie if money was to be so made;—all this did not hinder her love. She loved her Julie, and was broken-hearted that her Julie should have written to her in such a strain.

Poor Sophie! Julie's letter nearly broke her heart. She didn't deserve much credit for sincerity, but maybe a little was due. Being called Madame Gordeloup and receiving compliments from the woman— the countess with whom she had been so closely acquainted— did sting some tender feelings within her. The love she had to give, she gave to Julie. Even though she was always ready to take advantage of Julie, to use her, to sell her out, to threaten her, to argue with her if it helped her own ends— to expose Julie; even to destroy her if it meant making money— none of this stopped her from loving her. She loved Julie and felt heartbroken that Julie had written to her in such a way.

But her feelings were much more acute when she came to perceive that she had damaged her own affairs by the hint of a menace which she had thrown out. Business is business, and must take precedence of all sentiment and romance in this hard world in which bread is so necessary. Of that Madame Gordeloup was well aware. And therefore, having given herself but two short minutes to weep over her Julie's hardness, she applied her mind at once to the rectification of the error she had made. Yes; she had been wrong about the lawyer,—certainly wrong. But then these English people were so pig-headed! A slight suspicion of a hint, such as that she had made, would have been taken by a Frenchman, by a Russian, by a Pole, as meaning no more than it meant. "But these English are bulls; the men and the women are all like bulls,—bulls!"

But her feelings were much stronger when she realized that she had hurt her own situation by suggesting a threat. Business is business, and it must come before any feelings or romance in this tough world where making a living is essential. Madame Gordeloup knew this well. So, after giving herself just two minutes to cry over Julie's harshness, she immediately focused on fixing the mistake she had made. Yes, she had been wrong about the lawyer—definitely wrong. But these English people are so stubborn! A small hint, like the one she had thrown out, would be interpreted by a Frenchman, a Russian, or a Pole as meaning nothing more than it actually did. "But these English are like bulls; the men and women are all like bulls—bulls!"

She at once sat down and wrote another letter; another in such an ecstasy of eagerness to remove the evil impressions which she had made, that she wrote it almost with the natural effusion of her heart.—
 

She immediately sat down and wrote another letter; another in such a rush of eagerness to erase the bad impressions she had made, that she wrote it almost with the natural outpouring of her heart.

Dear Friend,—Your coldness kills me,—kills me! But perhaps I have deserved it. If I said there were legal demands I did deserve it. No; there are none. Legal demands! Oh, no. What can your poor friend demand legally? The lawyer—he knows nothing; he was a stranger. It was my brother spoke to him. What should I do with a lawyer? Oh, my friend, do not be angry with your poor servant. I write now not to ask for money,—but for a kind word; for one word of kindness and love to your Sophie before she have gone for ever! Yes; for ever. Oh, Julie, oh, my angel; I would lie at your feet and kiss them if you were here. Yours till death, even though you should still be hard to me,

Dear Friend,—Your indifference is hurting me,—really hurting me! But maybe I deserve it. If I claimed there were any legal responsibilities, I would deserve it. No; there aren’t any. Legal responsibilities! Oh, no. What could your poor friend possibly demand legally? The lawyer—he knows nothing; he was just a stranger. It was my brother who spoke to him. What would I even do with a lawyer? Oh, my friend, please don’t be upset with your poor servant. I’m writing now not to ask for money,—but for a kind word; just one word of kindness and love to your Sophie before she leaves forever! Yes; forever. Oh, Julie, oh, my angel; I would lie at your feet and kiss them if you were here. Yours until death, even if you remain distant toward me,

Sophie.
 

Sophie.

To this appeal Lady Ongar sent no direct answer, but she commissioned Mr. Turnbull, her lawyer, to call upon Madame Gordeloup and pay to that lady one hundred pounds, taking her receipt for the same. Lady Ongar, in her letter to the lawyer, explained that the woman in question had been useful in Florence; and explained also that she might pretend that she had further claims. "If so," said Lady Ongar, "I wish you to tell her that she can prosecute them at law if she pleases. The money I now give her is a gratuity made for certain services rendered in Florence during the illness of Lord Ongar." This commission Mr. Turnbull executed, and Sophie Gordeloup, when taking the money, made no demand for any further payment.

To this request, Lady Ongar didn’t give a direct response, but she asked her lawyer, Mr. Turnbull, to visit Madame Gordeloup and pay her one hundred pounds, making sure to get a receipt. In her letter to the lawyer, Lady Ongar explained that the woman had been helpful in Florence and mentioned that she might claim additional payments. "If that’s the case," Lady Ongar stated, "I want you to let her know that she can pursue those claims legally if she wants. The money I’m giving her now is a gratuity for certain services provided in Florence during Lord Ongar’s illness." Mr. Turnbull carried out this task, and when Sophie Gordeloup received the money, she didn’t ask for any further payment.

Four days after this a little woman, carrying a very big bandbox in her hands, might have been seen to scramble with difficulty out of a boat in the Thames up the side of a steamer bound from thence for Boulogne. And after her there climbed up an active little man, who, with peremptory voice, repulsed the boatman's demand for further payment. He also had a bandbox on his arm,—belonging, no doubt, to the little woman. And it might have been seen that the active little man, making his way to the table at which the clerk of the boat was sitting, out of his own purse paid the passage-money for two passengers,—through to Paris. And the head and legs and neck of that little man were like to the head and legs and neck of—our friend Doodles, alias Captain Boodle, of Warwickshire.

Four days later, a petite woman, struggling to manage a large bandbox in her hands, could be seen climbing awkwardly out of a boat on the Thames and onto a steamer headed to Boulogne. Following her was a lively little man who, with a commanding voice, dismissed the boatman’s request for more payment. He also had a bandbox on his arm, which likely belonged to the petite woman. It was noticeable that the energetic little man approached the table where the boat’s clerk was sitting and paid for the passage of two passengers—straight through to Paris. The head, legs, and neck of that little man resembled those of our acquaintance Doodles, also known as Captain Boodle from Warwickshire.

 

 

CHAPTER XLVII.

SHOWING HOW THINGS SETTLED THEMSELVES AT THE RECTORY.

When Harry's letter, with the tidings of the fate of his cousins, reached Florence at Stratton, the whole family was, not unnaturally, thrown into great excitement. Being slow people, the elder Burtons had hardly as yet realized the fact that Harry was again to be accepted among the Burton Penates as a pure divinity. Mrs. Burton, for some weeks past, had grown to be almost sublime in her wrath against him. That a man should live and treat her daughter as Florence was about to be treated! Had not her husband forbidden such a journey, as being useless in regard to the expenditure, she would have gone up to London that she might have told Harry what she thought of him. Then came the news that Harry was again a divinity,—an Apollo, whom the Burton Penates ought only to be too proud to welcome to a seat among them!

When Harry's letter, bringing news about his cousins' fate, arrived in Florence at Stratton, the whole family was, understandably, thrown into a frenzy. The elder Burtons, being a bit slow on the uptake, had hardly grasped that Harry was once again to be welcomed into the Burton household as a revered figure. For weeks, Mrs. Burton had become almost fanatically angry with him. How could a man live and treat her daughter in such a way as Florence was about to be treated? If her husband hadn't forbidden such a trip, claiming it was a waste of money, she would have traveled to London to tell Harry exactly what she thought of him. Then came the news that Harry was once again a revered figure—an Apollo, whom the Burton household should be more than proud to welcome among them!

And now came this other news that this Apollo was to be an Apollo indeed! When the god first became a god again, there was still a cloud upon the minds of the elder Burtons as to the means by which the divinity was to be sustained. A god in truth, but a god with so very moderate an annual income;—unless indeed those old Burtons made it up to an extent which seemed to them to be quite unnatural! There was joy among the Burtons, of course, but the joy was somewhat dimmed by these reflections as to the slight means of their Apollo. A lover who was not an Apollo might wait; but, as they had learned already, there was danger in keeping such a god as this suspended on the tenter-hooks of expectation.

And now came the news that this Apollo was going to be a true Apollo! When the god first returned to his divine status, the older Burtons still had their doubts about how the god would be supported. He was a real god, but with such a modest annual income; unless, of course, those old Burtons covered for him to an extent that felt a bit excessive! There was joy among the Burtons, of course, but their happiness was somewhat overshadowed by these concerns about their Apollo's limited resources. A suitor who wasn't an Apollo might be able to wait; but, as they had already learned, there was a risk in leaving a god like this hanging in suspense.

But now there came the further news! This Apollo of theirs had really a place of his own among the gods of Olympus. He was the eldest son of a man of large fortune, and would be a baronet! He had already declared that he would marry at once;—that his father wished him to do so, and that an abundant income would be forthcoming. As to his eagerness for an immediate marriage, no divinity in or out of the heavens could behave better. Old Mrs. Burton, as she went through the process of taking him again to her heart, remembered that that virtue had been his, even before the days of his backsliding had come. A warm-hearted, eager, affectionate divinity,—with only this against him, that he wanted some careful looking after in these, his unsettled days. "I really do think that he'll be as fond of his own fireside as any other man, when he has once settled down," said Mrs. Burton.

But now there was more news! This Apollo of theirs actually had his own spot among the gods of Olympus. He was the oldest son of a wealthy man and was set to become a baronet! He had already announced that he would marry right away—his father wanted him to do so, and a generous income was on the way. As for his eagerness to get married immediately, no god, whether up in the heavens or on Earth, could act any better. Old Mrs. Burton, as she welcomed him back into her heart, remembered that this had always been his quality, even before he went off track. A warm-hearted, eager, affectionate guy—with just one little thing against him: he needed some careful guidance during these uncertain times. "I really think he'll enjoy his own home as much as any other man once he settles down," said Mrs. Burton.

It will not, I hope, be taken as a blot on the character of this mother that she was much elated at the prospect of the good things which were to fall to her daughter's lot. For herself she desired nothing. For her daughters she had coveted only good, substantial, painstaking husbands, who would fear God and mind their business. When Harry Clavering had come across her path and had demanded a daughter from her, after the manner of the other young men who had learned the secrets of their profession at Stratton, she had desired nothing more than that he and Florence should walk in the path which had been followed by her sisters and their husbands. But then had come that terrible fear; and now had come these golden prospects. That her daughter should be Lady Clavering, of Clavering Park! She could not but be elated at the thought of it. She would not live to see it, but the consciousness that it would be so was pleasant to her in her old age. Florence had ever been regarded as the flower of the flock, and now she would be taken up into high places,—according to her deserts.

It shouldn't be seen as a flaw in this mother's character that she was very happy about the good things coming to her daughter. For herself, she wanted nothing. All she wished for her daughters was to have good, hardworking husbands who feared God and took their responsibilities seriously. When Harry Clavering came into her life and asked for her daughter, just like other young men who had trained at Stratton, she only hoped that he and Florence would follow the same path as her sisters and their husbands. But then that awful fear had struck her; and now, these amazing opportunities had arrived. Her daughter would be Lady Clavering of Clavering Park! She couldn't help but feel joy at the thought. She wouldn't live to see it, but just knowing it would happen brought her comfort in her old age. Florence had always been seen as the best of the bunch, and now she would rise to great heights, just as she deserved.

First had come the letter from Harry, and then, after an interval of a week, another letter from Mrs. Clavering, pressing her dear Florence to go to the parsonage. "We think that at present we all ought to be together," said Mrs. Clavering, "and therefore we want you to be with us." It was very flattering. "I suppose I ought to go, mamma?" said Florence. Mrs. Burton was of opinion that she certainly ought to go. "You should write to her ladyship at once," said Mrs. Burton, mindful of the change which had taken place. Florence, however, addressed her letter, as heretofore, to Mrs. Clavering, thinking that a mistake on that side would be better than a mistake on the other. It was not for her to be over-mindful of the rank with which she was about to be connected. "You won't forget your old mother now that you are going to be so grand?" said Mrs. Burton, as Florence was leaving her.

First came the letter from Harry, and then, a week later, another letter from Mrs. Clavering, urging her dear Florence to come to the parsonage. "We think we should all be together right now," said Mrs. Clavering, "so we want you to join us." It was very flattering. "I guess I should go, right, Mom?" Florence asked. Mrs. Burton felt that she definitely should go. "You need to write to her ladyship right away," Mrs. Burton advised, aware of the change that had occurred. However, Florence addressed her letter, as before, to Mrs. Clavering, believing that a mistake on that end would be better than a mistake on her part. It wasn’t her place to be overly conscious of the status she was about to be associated with. "You won’t forget your old mother now that you’re going to be so important?" Mrs. Burton said as Florence was leaving her.

"You only say that to laugh at me," said Florence. "I expect no grandness, and I am sure you expect no forgetfulness."

"You’re just saying that to make fun of me," Florence said. "I’m not expecting anything great, and I know you’re not expecting me to forget."

The solemnity consequent upon the first news of the accident had worn itself off, and Florence found the family at the parsonage happy and comfortable. Mrs. Fielding was still there, and Mr. Fielding was expected again after the next Sunday. Fanny also was there, and Florence could see during the first half-hour that she was very radiant. Mr. Saul, however, was not there, and it may as well be said at once that Mr. Saul as yet knew nothing of his coming fortune. Florence was received with open arms by them all, and by Harry with arms which were almost too open. "I suppose it may be in about three weeks from now?" he said at the first moment in which he could have her to himself.

The seriousness that came with the first news of the accident had faded, and Florence found the family at the parsonage happy and settled. Mrs. Fielding was still there, and Mr. Fielding was expected back after the next Sunday. Fanny was there too, and Florence could tell in the first half-hour that she seemed very joyful. Mr. Saul, however, wasn’t around, and it should be mentioned right away that Mr. Saul still knew nothing about his impending fortune. Florence was welcomed with open arms by everyone, especially by Harry, whose embrace was almost too enthusiastic. "I guess it’ll be about three weeks from now?" he asked at the first chance he had to speak with her privately.

"Oh, Harry,—no," said Florence.

"Oh, Harry, no," said Florence.

"No;—why no? That's what my mother proposes."

"No;—why not? That's what my mom suggests."

"In three weeks!—She could not have said that. Nobody has begun to think of such a thing yet at Stratton."

"In three weeks!—She couldn't have said that. No one has started to think about something like that yet at Stratton."

"They are so very slow at Stratton!"

"They're super slow at Stratton!"

"And you are so very fast at Clavering! But, Harry, we don't know where we are going to live."

"And you are so quick at Clavering! But, Harry, we still don't know where we're going to live."

"We should go abroad at first, I suppose."

"We should travel abroad first, I guess."

"And what then? That would only be for a month or so."

"And then what? That would only be for about a month."

"Only for a month? I mean for all the winter,—and the spring. Why not? One can see nothing in a month. If we are back for the shooting next year that would do,—and then of course we should come here. I should say next winter,—that is the winter after the next,—we might as well stay with them at the big house, and then we could look about us, you know. I should like a place near to this, because of the hunting!"

"Only for a month? I mean for the whole winter—and the spring. Why not? You can’t really see anything in just a month. If we’re back for the shooting next year, that would be fine—and of course, we’d want to come here. I’d say next winter—that is, the winter after this upcoming one—we might as well stay with them at the big house, and then we can explore a bit, you know. I’d like a place nearby because of the hunting!"

Florence, when she heard all this, became aware that in talking about a month she had forgotten herself. She had been accustomed to holidays of a month's duration,—and to honeymoon trips fitted to such vacations. A month was the longest holiday ever heard of in the chambers in the Adelphi,—or at the house in Onslow Crescent. She had forgotten herself. It was not to be the lot of her husband to earn his bread, and fit himself to such periods as business might require. Then Harry went on describing the tour which he had arranged;—which as he said he only suggested. But it was quite apparent that in this matter he intended to be paramount. Florence indeed made no objection. To spend a fortnight in Paris;—to hurry over the Alps before the cold weather came; to spend a month in Florence, and then go on to Rome;—it would all be very nice. But she declared that it would suit the next year better than this.

Florence, upon hearing all this, realized that while discussing a month, she had lost track of herself. She was used to vacations lasting a month—and to honeymoon trips designed for such breaks. A month was the longest holiday she had ever known in the chambers at the Adelphi—or at the house on Onslow Crescent. She had lost sight of herself. It wasn’t meant for her husband to earn a living and adjust to the time periods that work might require. Then Harry continued explaining the trip he had planned; he stated it was just a suggestion. But it was clear that he meant to take charge in this matter. Florence didn’t object. Spending two weeks in Paris; rushing over the Alps before the cold set in; a month in Florence, and then off to Rome—it all sounded lovely. However, she insisted that it would be better for the following year than this one.

"Suit ten thousand fiddlesticks," said Harry.

"Do what you want," said Harry.

"But it is October now."

"But it's October now."

"And therefore there is no time to lose."

"And so there’s no time to waste."

"I haven't a dress in the world but the one I have on, and a few others like it. Oh, Harry, how can you talk in that way?"

"I don't have any dress in the world except for the one I'm wearing, and a few others like it. Oh, Harry, how can you speak like that?"

"Well, say four weeks then from now. That will make it the seventh of November, and we'll only stay a day or two in Paris. We can do Paris next year,—in May. If you'll agree to that, I'll agree."

"Alright, let’s say four weeks from now. That brings us to November 7th, and we’ll only stay a day or two in Paris. We can explore Paris next year—in May. If you’re okay with that, then I’m in."

But Florence's breath was taken away from her, and she could agree to nothing. She did agree to nothing till she had been talked into doing so by Mrs. Clavering.

But Florence was completely stunned, and she couldn't agree to anything. It wasn't until Mrs. Clavering persuaded her that she eventually agreed.

"My dear," said her future mother-in-law, "what you say is undoubtedly true. There is no absolute necessity for hurrying. It is not an affair of life and death. But you and Harry have been engaged quite long enough now, and I really don't see why you should put it off. If you do as he asks you, you will just have time to make yourselves comfortable before the cold weather begins."

"My dear," said her future mother-in-law, "what you’re saying is definitely true. There’s no urgent need to rush. It’s not a matter of life and death. But you and Harry have been engaged for a long time now, and I really don’t understand why you should delay. If you do what he asks, you’ll have plenty of time to settle in before the colder weather starts."

"But mamma will be so surprised."

"But Mom will be so surprised."

"I'm sure she will wish it, my dear. You see Harry is a young man of that sort,—so impetuous I mean, you know, and so eager,—and so—you know what I mean,—that the sooner he is married the better. You can't but take it as a compliment, Florence, that he is so eager."

"I'm sure she will want that, my dear. You see, Harry is the kind of guy who is really impulsive and enthusiastic—you know what I mean—and I think the sooner he gets married, the better. You can't help but take it as a compliment, Florence, that he is so eager."

"Of course I do."

"Absolutely, I do."

"And you should reward him. Believe me it will be best that it should not be delayed." Whether or no Mrs. Clavering had present in her imagination the possibility of any further danger that might result from Lady Ongar, I will not say, but if so, she altogether failed in communicating her idea to Florence.

"And you should reward him. Trust me, it’s better if you don’t delay." Whether or not Mrs. Clavering was thinking about any potential danger that might come from Lady Ongar, I can't say, but if she was, she completely failed to convey her concerns to Florence.

"Then I must go home at once," said Florence, driven almost to bewail the terrors of her position.

"Then I need to go home right away," said Florence, nearly overwhelmed by the fears of her situation.

"You can write home at once and tell your mother. You can tell her all that I say, and I am sure she will agree with me. If you wish it, I will write a line to Mrs. Burton myself." Florence said that she would wish it. "And we can begin, you know, to get your things ready here. People don't take so long about all that now-a-days as they used to do." When Mrs. Clavering had turned against her, Florence knew that she had no hope, and surrendered, subject to the approval of the higher authorities at Stratton. The higher authorities at Stratton approved also, of course, and Florence found herself fixed to a day with a suddenness that bewildered her. Immediately,—almost as soon as the consent had been extorted from her,—she began to be surrounded with incipient preparation for the event, as to which, about three weeks since, she had made up her mind that it would never come to pass.

"You can write home right away and tell your mom. You can share everything I say, and I’m sure she’ll agree with me. If you want, I’ll write a note to Mrs. Burton myself." Florence said she wanted that. "And we can start getting your things ready here. People don’t take as long to do that nowadays as they used to." When Mrs. Clavering turned against her, Florence realized she had no hope and surrendered, pending the approval of the higher-ups at Stratton. The higher-ups at Stratton approved as well, of course, and Florence found herself set for a day with a suddenness that confused her. Almost as soon as her consent had been gotten, she started to be surrounded by the early preparations for the event, which, about three weeks earlier, she had convinced herself would never happen.

On the second day of her arrival, in the privacy of her bedroom, Fanny communicated to her the decision of her family in regard to Mr. Saul. But she told the story at first as though this decision referred to the living only,—as though the rectory were to be conferred on Mr. Saul without any burden attached to it. "He has been here so long, dear," said Fanny, "and understands the people so well."

On the second day after she arrived, in the privacy of her bedroom, Fanny shared her family's decision about Mr. Saul. But she began the story as if this decision only applied to the living—as if the rectory was going to be given to Mr. Saul without any strings attached. "He's been here so long, dear," Fanny said, "and knows the people so well."

"I am so delighted," said Florence.

"I'm so happy," Florence said.

"I am sure it is the best thing papa could do;—that is if he quite makes up his mind to give up the parish himself."

"I’m sure it’s the best thing Dad could do; that is, if he really decides to give up the parish himself."

This troubled Florence, who did not know that a baronet could hold a living.

This worried Florence, who didn’t realize that a baronet could have a position as a clergyman.

"I thought he must give up being a clergyman now that Sir Hugh is dead?"

"I thought he would have to stop being a clergyman now that Sir Hugh is dead?"

"O dear, no." And then Fanny, who was great on ecclesiastical subjects, explained it all. "Even though he were to be a peer, he could hold a living if he pleased. A great many baronets are clergymen, and some of them do hold preferments. As to papa, the doubt has been with him whether he would wish to give up the work. But he will preach sometimes, you know; though of course he will not be able to do that unless Mr. Saul lets him. No one but the rector has a right to his own pulpit except the bishop; and he can preach three times a year if he likes it."

"O dear, no." Then Fanny, who was really into church topics, explained everything. "Even if he became a peer, he could still have a job in the church if he wanted. Many baronets are clergymen, and some of them do hold church positions. As for Dad, he's been uncertain about whether he wants to give up the work. But he will preach sometimes, you know; although of course he can't do that unless Mr. Saul allows him. Only the rector and the bishop have the right to their own pulpit; and he can preach three times a year if he wants to."

"And suppose the bishop wanted to preach four times?"

"And what if the bishop wanted to preach four times?"

"He couldn't do it; at least, I believe not. But you see he never wants to preach at all,—not in such a place as this,—so that does not signify."

"He couldn't do it; at least, I don't think so. But you see, he never wants to preach at all—not in a place like this—so that doesn't matter."

"And will Mr. Saul come and live here, in this house?"

"And will Mr. Saul come and live here, in this house?"

"Some day I suppose he will," said Fanny, blushing.

"Someday, I guess he will," said Fanny, blushing.

"And you, dear?"

"And you, my dear?"

"I don't know how that may be."

"I don't know how that could be."

"Come, Fanny."

"Come on, Fanny."

"Indeed I don't, Florence, or I would tell you. Of course Mr. Saul has asked me. I never had any secret with you about that; have I?"

"Honestly, I don’t, Florence, or I would let you know. Of course Mr. Saul asked me. I’ve never kept anything from you about that; have I?"

"No; you were very good."

"No; you did great."

"Then he asked me again; twice again. And then there came,—oh, such a quarrel between him and papa. It was so terrible. Do you know, I believe they wouldn't speak in the vestry! Not but what each of them has the highest possible opinion of the other. But of course Mr. Saul couldn't marry on a curacy. When I think of it it really seems that he must have been mad."

"Then he asked me again; two more times. And then there was—oh, such a fight between him and Dad. It was so awful. Can you believe they wouldn't even talk in the vestry? It's not that they don't think highly of each other. But, of course, Mr. Saul couldn't get married with just a curacy. When I think about it, it really seems like he must have been crazy."

"But you don't think him so mad now, dear?"

"But you don't think he's so crazy now, right, dear?"

"He doesn't know a word about it yet; not a word. He hasn't been in the house since, and papa and he didn't speak,—not in a friendly way,—till the news came of poor Hugh's being drowned. Then he came up to papa, and, of course, papa took his hand. But he still thinks he is going away."

"He doesn't know anything about it yet; not a single thing. He hasn't been in the house since, and he and Dad didn't talk—not in a friendly way—until the news came about poor Hugh drowning. Then he went up to Dad, and of course, Dad took his hand. But he still thinks he's leaving."

"And when is he to be told that he needn't go?"

"And when is someone going to tell him that he doesn't have to go?"

"That is the difficulty. Mamma will have to do it, I believe. But what she will say, I'm sure I for one can't think."

"That's the problem. I think Mom will have to handle it. But I really can't imagine what she'll say."

"Mrs. Clavering will have no difficulty."

"Mrs. Clavering won’t have any trouble."

"You mustn't call her Mrs. Clavering."

"You shouldn't call her Mrs. Clavering."

"Lady Clavering then."

"Lady Clavering, then."

"That's a great deal worse. She's your mamma now,—not quite so much as she is mine, but the next thing to it."

"That's a lot worse. She's your mom now—not quite as much as she is mine, but pretty close."

"She'll know what to say to Mr. Saul."

"She'll know what to say to Mr. Saul."

"But what is she to say?"

"But what is she supposed to say?"

"Well, Fanny,—you ought to know that. I suppose you do—love him?"

"Well, Fanny—you should know that. I guess you do—love him?"

"I have never told him so."

"I've never told him this."

"But you will?"

"But you will, right?"

"It seems so odd. Mamma will have to— Suppose he were to turn round and say he didn't want me?"

"It seems really strange. Mom will have to— What if he turns around and says he doesn’t want me?"

"That would be awkward."

"That would be uncomfortable."

"He would in a minute if that was what he felt. The idea of having the living would not weigh with him a bit."

"He would do it in a heartbeat if that's how he felt. The thought of having the living wouldn't bother him at all."

"But when he was so much in love before, it won't make him out of love;—will it?"

"But when he was so in love before, it won't make him stop loving;—will it?"

"I don't know," said Fanny. "At any rate, mamma is to see him to-morrow, and after that I suppose;—I'm sure I don't know,—but I suppose he'll come to the rectory as he used to do."

"I don’t know," Fanny said. "Anyway, Mom is going to see him tomorrow, and after that I guess;—I really don’t know,—but I guess he’ll come to the rectory like he used to."

"How happy you must be," said Florence, kissing her. To this Fanny made some unintelligible demur. It was undoubtedly possible that, under the altered circumstances of the case, so strange a being as Mr. Saul might have changed his mind.

"How happy you must be," said Florence, giving her a kiss. In response, Fanny mumbled something that was hard to understand. It was definitely possible that, given the changed situation, someone as unusual as Mr. Saul might have had a change of heart.

There was a great trial awaiting Florence Burton. She had to be taken up to call on the ladies at the great house,—on the two widowed ladies who were still remaining there when she came to Clavering. It was only on the day before her arrival that Harry had seen Lady Ongar. He had thought much of the matter before he went across to the house, doubting whether it would not be better to let Julia go without troubling her with a further interview. But he had not then seen even Lady Clavering since the tidings of her bereavement had come, and he felt that it would not be well that he should let his cousin's widow leave Clavering without offering her his sympathy. And it might be better, also, that he should see Julia once again, if only that he might show himself capable of meeting her without the exhibition of any peculiar emotion. He went, therefore, to the house, and having asked for Lady Clavering, saw both the sisters together. He soon found that the presence of the younger one was a relief to him. Lady Clavering was so sad, and so peevish in her sadness,—so broken-spirited, so far as yet from recognizing the great enfranchisement that had come to her, that with her alone he would have found himself almost unable to express the sympathy which he felt. But with Lady Ongar he had no difficulty. Lady Ongar, her sister being with them in the room, talked to him easily, as though there had never been anything between them to make conversation difficult. That all words between them should, on such an occasion as this, be sad, was a matter of course; but it seemed to Harry that Julia had freed herself from all the effects of that feeling which had existed between them, and that it would become him to do this as effectually as she had done it. Such an idea, at least, was in his mind for a moment; but when he left her she spoke one word which dispelled it. "Harry," she said, "you must ask Miss Burton to come across and see me. I hear that she is to be at the rectory to-morrow." Harry of course said that he would send her. "She will understand why I cannot go to her, as I should do,—but for poor Hermy's position. You will explain this, Harry." Harry, blushing up to his forehead, declared that Florence would require no explanation, and that she would certainly make the visit as proposed. "I wish to see her, Harry,—so much. And if I do not see her now, I may never have another chance."

There was a big challenge ahead for Florence Burton. She needed to go visit the ladies at the big house—the two widowed ladies who had still been there when she arrived in Clavering. Just the day before her arrival, Harry had seen Lady Ongar. He had thought a lot about whether it would be better to let Julia go without putting her through another meeting. But he hadn’t seen Lady Clavering since he heard the news of her loss, and he felt it wouldn’t be right to let his cousin’s widow leave Clavering without offering his sympathy. It might also be good for him to see Julia one more time, if only to prove that he could be around her without showing any unusual emotion. So, he went to the house, asked for Lady Clavering, and saw both sisters together. He quickly realized that having the younger sister there was a relief. Lady Clavering was so sad and irritable in her sadness—so broken-hearted, so far from recognizing the newfound freedom that had come to her—that he would have struggled to express his sympathy if it were just her. But with Lady Ongar, he found no difficulty. With her sister present in the room, Lady Ongar spoke to him easily, as if nothing had ever happened between them to make conversation awkward. Of course, their words during such a sad time were heavy, but it seemed to Harry that Julia had moved beyond the feelings that had once existed between them, and he should do the same as effectively as she had. At least, that thought crossed his mind for a moment; however, when he left her, she said something that changed it. “Harry,” she said, “you have to ask Miss Burton to come see me. I hear she’s going to be at the rectory tomorrow.” Harry replied that he would send her. “She’ll understand why I can’t go to her, even though I want to—if it weren't for poor Hermy's situation. You’ll explain this, Harry.” Harry, blushing deeply, insisted that Florence wouldn’t need any explanation and that she would definitely make the visit as suggested. “I really want to see her, Harry—so much. If I don’t see her now, I may never get another chance.”

It was nearly a week after this that Florence went across to the great house with Mrs. Clavering and Fanny. I think that she understood the nature of the visit she was called upon to make, and no doubt she trembled much at the coming ordeal. She was going to see her great rival,—her rival, who had almost been preferred to her,—nay, who had been preferred to her for some short space of time, and whose claims as to beauty and wealth were so greatly superior to her own. And this woman whom she was to see had been the first love of the man whom she now regarded as her own,—and would have been about to be his wife at this moment had it not been for her own treachery to him. Was she so beautiful as people said? Florence, in the bottom of her heart, wished that she might have been saved from this interview.

It was almost a week later that Florence went to the big house with Mrs. Clavering and Fanny. I think she understood the kind of visit she was about to make, and she probably felt a lot of anxiety about the upcoming situation. She was going to see her main rival—someone who had almost been chosen over her—actually, who had been chosen for a short time, and whose advantages in beauty and wealth were far greater than her own. And this woman was the first love of the man who Florence now considered to be hers—and she would have been his wife right now if it weren't for Florence's own betrayal. Was she really as beautiful as everyone said? Deep down, Florence wished she could avoid this meeting.

The three ladies from the rectory found the two ladies at the great house sitting together in the small drawing-room. Florence was so confused that she could hardly bring herself to speak to Lady Clavering, or so much as to look at Lady Ongar. She shook hands with the elder sister, and knew that her hand was then taken by the other. Julia at first spoke a very few words to Mrs. Clavering, and Fanny sat herself down beside Hermione. Florence took a chair at a little distance, and was left there for a few minutes without notice. For this she was very thankful, and by degrees was able to fix her eyes on the face of the woman whom she so feared to see, and yet on whom she so desired to look. Lady Clavering was a mass of ill-arranged widow's weeds. She had assumed in all its grotesque ugliness those paraphernalia of outward woe which women have been condemned to wear, in order that for a time they may be shorn of all the charms of their sex. Nothing could be more proper or unbecoming than the heavy, drooping, shapeless blackness in which Lady Clavering had enveloped herself. But Lady Ongar, though also a widow, though as yet a widow of not twelve months' standing, was dressed,—in weeds, no doubt,—but in weeds which had been so cultivated that they were as good as flowers. She was very beautiful. Florence owned to herself as she sat there in silence, that Lady Ongar was the most beautiful woman that she had ever seen. But hers was not the beauty by which, as she would have thought, Harry Clavering would have been attracted. Lady Ongar's form, bust, and face were, at this period of her life, almost majestic; whereas the softness and grace of womanhood were the charms which Harry loved. He had sometimes said to Florence that, to his taste, Cecilia Burton was almost perfect as a woman. And there could be no contrast greater than that between Cecilia Burton and Lady Ongar. But Florence did not remember that the Julia Brabazon of three years since had not been the same as the Lady Ongar whom now she saw.

The three ladies from the rectory found the two women at the big house sitting together in the small drawing-room. Florence was so flustered that she could hardly bring herself to speak to Lady Clavering, or even look at Lady Ongar. She shook hands with the older sister and realized that the other woman took her hand too. Julia initially exchanged just a few words with Mrs. Clavering, while Fanny sat down next to Hermione. Florence took a chair a little way off and sat there for a few minutes without anyone paying attention to her. She was quite grateful for this and gradually managed to focus her gaze on the face of the woman she both feared and longed to see. Lady Clavering was a jumble of poorly arranged widow's attire. She wore all the dramatized signs of grief that women are expected to don, effectively stripping her of all the charms of femininity for a time. Nothing could be more fitting or less appealing than the heavy, drooping, shapeless blackness in which Lady Clavering had wrapped herself. But Lady Ongar, although also a widow and one who had only been in mourning for less than a year, was dressed—in mourning clothes, yes—yet in attire that had been tailored to the point of being almost flower-like. She was very beautiful. As Florence sat there in silence, she admitted to herself that Lady Ongar was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. However, it wasn't the kind of beauty that she thought would attract Harry Clavering. Lady Ongar's form, bust, and face were, at this stage of her life, nearly majestic; whereas it was the softness and grace of womanhood that Harry loved. He had once told Florence that, to him, Cecilia Burton was nearly perfect as a woman. And there could be no greater contrast than between Cecilia Burton and Lady Ongar. But Florence didn’t remember that the Julia Brabazon from three years ago had not been the same as the Lady Ongar she was seeing now.

When they had been there some minutes Lady Ongar came and sat beside Florence, moving her seat as though she were doing the most natural thing in the world. Florence's heart came to her mouth, but she made a resolution that she would, if possible, bear herself well. "You have been at Clavering before, I think?" said Lady Ongar. Florence said that she had been at the parsonage during the last Easter. "Yes,—I heard that you dined here with my brother-in-law." This she said in a low voice, having seen that Lady Clavering was engaged with Fanny and Mrs. Clavering. "Was it not terribly sudden?"

When they had been there for a few minutes, Lady Ongar came over and sat next to Florence, adjusting her seat as if it was the most natural thing to do. Florence's heart raced, but she resolved to keep her composure. "I think you've been to Clavering before, right?" Lady Ongar said. Florence replied that she had stayed at the parsonage last Easter. "Yes—I heard you had dinner here with my brother-in-law." She said this in a quiet voice, noticing that Lady Clavering was occupied with Fanny and Mrs. Clavering. "Wasn't it all so sudden?"

"Terribly sudden," said Florence.

"Really sudden," said Florence.

"The two brothers! Had you not met Captain Clavering?"

"The two brothers! Haven't you met Captain Clavering?"

"Yes,—he was here when I dined with your sister."

"Yeah, he was here when I had dinner with your sister."

"Poor fellow! Is it not odd that they should have gone, and that their friend, whose yacht it was, should have been saved? They say, however, that Mr. Stuart behaved admirably, begging his friends to get into the boat first. He stayed by the vessel when the boat was carried away, and he was saved in that way. But he meant to do the best he could for them. There's no doubt of that."

"Poor guy! Isn’t it strange that they went overboard, and that their friend, whose yacht it was, got saved? But people are saying that Mr. Stuart acted incredibly well, urging his friends to get in the boat first. He stayed with the ship when the boat was taken away, and that’s how he was saved. But he really intended to do everything he could for them. There’s no doubt about that."

"But how dreadful his feelings must be!"

"But how awful he must feel!"

"Men do not think so much of these things as we do. They have so much more to employ their minds. Don't you think so?" Florence did not at the moment quite know what she thought about men's feelings, but said that she supposed that such was the case. "But I think that after all they are juster than we are," continued Lady Ongar,—"juster and truer, though not so tender-hearted. Mr. Stuart, no doubt, would have been willing to drown himself to save his friends, because the fault was in some degree his. I don't know that I should have been able to do so much."

"Men don't think about these things as much as we do. They have way more on their minds. Don't you agree?" Florence wasn't really sure what to think about men's feelings at that moment, but she said she supposed that was true. "But I believe that, after all, they're fairer than we are," Lady Ongar continued, "fairer and more genuine, though not as compassionate. Mr. Stuart would definitely have been willing to sacrifice himself to save his friends because he felt partly responsible. I'm not sure I could have done the same."

"In such a moment it must have been so difficult to think of what ought to be done."

"In that moment, it must have been really hard to figure out what needed to be done."

"Yes, indeed; and there is but little good in speculating upon it now. You know this place, do you not;—the house, I mean, and the gardens?"

"Yes, that’s right; and there’s not much point in thinking about it now. You know this place, right?—the house, I mean, and the gardens?"

"Not very well." Florence, as she answered this question, began again to tremble. "Take a turn with me, and I will show you the garden. My hat and cloak are in the hall." Then Florence got up to accompany her, trembling very much inwardly. "Miss Burton and I are going out for a few minutes," said Lady Ongar, addressing herself to Mrs. Clavering. "We will not keep you waiting very long."

"Not great." As Florence replied to this question, she started to shake again. "Walk with me, and I'll show you the garden. My hat and coat are in the hallway." Then Florence stood up to join her, shaking a lot on the inside. "Miss Burton and I are stepping out for a few minutes," Lady Ongar said to Mrs. Clavering. "We won't be too long."

"We are in no hurry," said Mrs. Clavering. Then Florence was carried off, and found herself alone with her conquered rival.

"We're not in a rush," said Mrs. Clavering. Then Florence was taken away and found herself alone with her defeated rival.

"Not that there is much to show you," said Lady Ongar; "indeed nothing; but the place must be of more interest to you than to any one else; and if you are fond of that sort of thing, no doubt you will make it all that is charming."

"Not that there’s much to show you," said Lady Ongar; "actually, nothing; but this place must be more interesting to you than to anyone else; and if you like that kind of thing, I’m sure you’ll make it all very charming."

"I am very fond of a garden," said Florence.

"I really love a garden," said Florence.

"I don't know whether I am. Alone, by myself, I think I should care nothing for the prettiest Eden in all England. I don't think I would care for a walk through the Elysian fields by myself. I am a chameleon, and take the colour of those with whom I live. My future colours will not be very bright as I take it. It's a gloomy place enough; is it not? But there are fine trees, you see, which are the only things which one cannot by any possibility command. Given good trees, taste and money may do anything very quickly; as I have no doubt you'll find."

"I don't really know if I am. Alone, by myself, I think I wouldn’t care at all about the prettiest Eden in all of England. I don’t think I would enjoy a walk through the Elysian fields on my own. I'm like a chameleon, adapting to the vibe of the people I’m with. My future will probably not be very bright, as I see it. It’s kind of a gloomy place, isn’t it? But there are beautiful trees, which are the only things you can’t really control. With good trees, taste and money can get you anything very quickly; I have no doubt you’ll see that."

"I don't suppose I shall have much to do with it—at present."

"I don't think I'll have much to do with it—right now."

"I should think that you will have everything to do with it. There, Miss Burton; I brought you here to show you this very spot, and to make to you my confession here,—and to get from you, here, one word of confidence, if you will give it me." Florence was trembling now outwardly as well as inwardly. "You know my story; as far, I mean, as I had a story once, in conjunction with Harry Clavering?"

"I believe you will have a lot to do with this. There, Miss Burton; I brought you here to show you this very place, to make my confession to you here, and to get from you, right here, one word of trust, if you’re willing to give it to me." Florence was shaking now, both on the outside and the inside. "You know my story; at least, as much as I had a story once, connected with Harry Clavering?"

Lady Ongar and Florence.
Lady Ongar and Florence.
Click to __A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__

"I think I do," said Florence.

"I think I do," Florence said.

"I am sure you do," said Lady Ongar. "He has told me that you do; and what he says is always true. It was here, on this spot, that I gave him back his troth to me, and told him that I would have none of his love, because he was poor. That is barely two years ago. Now he is poor no longer. Now, had I been true to him, a marriage with him would have been, in a prudential point of view, all that any woman could desire. I gave up the dearest heart, the sweetest temper, ay, and the truest man that, that— Well, you have won him instead, and he has been the gainer. I doubt whether I ever should have made him happy; but I know that you will do so. It was just here that I parted from him."

"I’m sure you do," said Lady Ongar. "He told me you do, and what he says is always true. It was right here that I returned his promise to me and told him I couldn’t accept his love because he was poor. That was hardly two years ago. Now he’s no longer poor. Had I stayed true to him, marrying him would have been, from a practical standpoint, everything any woman could want. I gave up the most cherished heart, the sweetest nature, and the truest man that— Well, you’ve won him instead, and he’s better off for it. I doubt I could have ever made him happy, but I know you will. It was right here that I said goodbye to him."

"He has told me of that parting," said Florence.

"He told me about that goodbye," said Florence.

"I am sure he has. And, Miss Burton, if you will allow me to say one word further,—do not be made to think any ill of him because of what happened the other day."

"I’m sure he has. And, Miss Burton, if I could just say one more thing—don’t let what happened the other day make you think badly of him."

"I think no ill of him," said Florence proudly.

"I don't think badly of him," said Florence proudly.

"That is well. But I am sure you do not. You are not one to think evil, as I take it, of anybody; much less of him whom you love. When he saw me again, free as I am, and when I saw him, thinking him also to be free, was it strange that some memory of old days should come back upon us? But the fault, if fault there has been, was mine."

"That's good. But I know you don't. You aren't the kind of person to think badly of anyone, especially not of the one you love. When he saw me again, as free as I am, and when I saw him, thinking he was also free, was it weird that some memories from the past came rushing back? But if there's any fault, it's mine."

"I have never said that there was any fault."

"I've never said there was any fault."

"No, Miss Burton; but others have said so. No doubt I am foolish to talk to you in this way; and I have not yet said that which I desired to say. It is simply this;—that I do not begrudge you your happiness. I wished the same happiness to be mine; but it is not mine. It might have been, but I forfeited it. It is past; and I will pray that you may enjoy it long. You will not refuse to receive my congratulations?"

"No, Miss Burton; but others have said so. I know it’s silly of me to talk to you like this, and I haven’t yet said what I really wanted to say. Here it is: I don’t resent you for your happiness. I wished for that same happiness for myself, but it’s not mine. It could have been, but I gave it up. It’s in the past, and I’ll hope that you enjoy it for a long time. You won’t turn down my congratulations, will you?"

"Indeed, I will not."

"Yeah, I won't."

"Or to think of me as a friend of your husband's?"

"Or should you think of me as a friend of your husband's?"

"Oh, no."

"Oh no."

"That is all then. I have shown you the gardens, and now we may go in. Some day, perhaps, when you are Lady Paramount here, and your children are running about the place, I may come again to see them;—if you and he will have me."

"That's it then. I've shown you the gardens, and now we can head inside. Maybe one day, when you're the Lady Paramount here and your kids are playing around, I can come back to see them—if you and he will have me."

"I hope you will, Lady Ongar. In truth, I hope so."

"I really hope you will, Lady Ongar. Honestly, I do."

"It is odd enough that I said to him once that I would never go to Clavering Park again till I went there to see his wife. That was long before those two poor brothers perished,—before I had ever heard of Florence Burton. And yet, indeed, it was not very long ago. It was since my husband died. But that was not quite true, for here I am, and he has not yet got a wife. But it was odd; was it not?"

"It’s strange that I once told him I would never go back to Clavering Park until I went there to see his wife. That was long before those two poor brothers died—before I even heard of Florence Burton. And yet, it wasn’t actually that long ago. It was after my husband died. But that’s not entirely true, because here I am, and he still doesn’t have a wife. But it is strange, isn’t it?"

"I cannot think what should have made you say that."

"I can't imagine what made you say that."

"A spirit of prophecy comes on one sometimes, I suppose. Well; shall we go in? I have shown you all the wonders of the garden, and told you all the wonders connected with it of which I know aught. No doubt there would be other wonders, more wonderful, if one could ransack the private history of all the Claverings for the last hundred years. I hope, Miss Burton, that any marvels which may attend your career here may be happy marvels." She then took Florence by the hand, and drawing close to her, stooped over and kissed her. "You will think me a fool, of course," said she; "but I do not care for that." Florence now was in tears, and could make no answer in words; but she pressed the hand which she still held, and then followed her companion back into the house. After that, the visit was soon brought to an end, and the three ladies from the rectory returned across the park to their house.

"A spirit of prophecy comes over you sometimes, I guess. Well; should we head inside? I've shown you all the wonders of the garden and shared everything I know about it. No doubt there are other amazing stories, even more amazing, if we could dig into the private history of all the Claverings for the past hundred years. I hope, Miss Burton, that any wonders that come your way here will be happy ones." She then took Florence by the hand, leaned in close, and kissed her. "You'll think I'm silly, of course," she said, "but I don't mind." Florence was now in tears and couldn't respond with words; instead, she squeezed the hand she was holding and then followed her friend back into the house. After that, the visit wrapped up quickly, and the three ladies from the rectory made their way back across the park to their home.

 

 

CHAPTER XLVIII.

CONCLUSION.

Florence Burton had taken upon herself to say that Mrs. Clavering would have no difficulty in making to Mr. Saul the communication which was now needed before he could be received at the rectory, as the rector's successor and future son-in-law; but Mrs. Clavering was by no means so confident of her own powers. To her it seemed as though the undertaking which she had in hand, was one surrounded with difficulties. Her husband, when the matter was being discussed, at once made her understand that he would not relieve her by an offer to perform the task. He had been made to break the bad news to Lady Clavering, and, having been submissive in that matter, felt himself able to stand aloof altogether as to this more difficult embassy. "I suppose it would hardly do to ask Harry to see him again," Mrs. Clavering had said. "You would do it much better, my dear," the rector had replied. Then Mrs. Clavering had submitted in her turn; and when the scheme was fully matured, and the time had come in which the making of the proposition could no longer be delayed with prudence, Mr. Saul was summoned by a short note. "Dear Mr. Saul,—If you are disengaged would you come to me at the rectory at eleven to-morrow?—Yours ever, M. C." Mr. Saul of course said that he would come. When the to-morrow had arrived and breakfast was over, the rector and Harry took themselves off, somewhere about the grounds of the great house,—counting up their treasures of proprietorship, as we can fancy that men so circumstanced would do,—while Mary Fielding with Fanny and Florence retired upstairs, so that they might be well out of the way. They knew, all of them, what was about to be done, and Fanny behaved herself like a white lamb decked with bright ribbons for the sacrificial altar. To her it was a sacrificial morning,—very sacred, very solemn, and very trying to the nerves. "I don't think that any girl was ever in such a position before," she said to her sister. "A great many girls would be glad to be in the same position," Mrs. Fielding replied. "Do you think so? To me there is something almost humiliating in the idea that he should be asked to take me." "Fiddlestick, my dear," replied Mrs. Fielding.

Florence Burton took it upon herself to say that Mrs. Clavering wouldn’t have any trouble telling Mr. Saul the news he needed to hear before he could be welcomed at the rectory as the rector’s successor and future son-in-law; however, Mrs. Clavering wasn’t nearly as confident in her abilities. It felt to her like the task ahead was fraught with challenges. Her husband, when the issue was brought up, made it clear he wouldn’t ease her burden by volunteering to do it himself. He had already been tasked with breaking the bad news to Lady Clavering, and after being compliant in that situation, he felt it was best to completely distance himself from this more difficult message. “I suppose it wouldn’t be appropriate to ask Harry to meet with him again,” Mrs. Clavering said. “You would handle it much better, my dear,” the rector replied. Mrs. Clavering then resigned herself to the situation; and when the plan was fully set and the time had come to make the proposition without further delay, Mr. Saul was invited with a brief note. “Dear Mr. Saul,—If you are free, could you come to the rectory at eleven tomorrow?—Yours ever, M. C.” Mr. Saul, of course, said he would come. When the next day arrived and breakfast was done, the rector and Harry went off to wander around the grounds of the large house—counting their possessions, as one might imagine men in their situation would do—while Mary Fielding, Fanny, and Florence retreated upstairs to stay out of the way. They all knew what was about to happen, and Fanny acted like a white lamb adorned with bright ribbons for the altar. For her, it was a morning of sacrifice—very sacred, very serious, and very stressful. “I don’t think any girl has ever been in this position before,” she told her sister. “Many girls would be thrilled to be in the same situation,” Mrs. Fielding replied. “Really? To me, there’s something almost embarrassing about the idea of him being asked to take me.” “Nonsense, my dear,” Mrs. Fielding responded.

Mr. Saul came, punctual as the church clock,—of which he had the regulating himself,—and was shown into the rectory dining-room, where Mrs. Clavering was sitting alone. He looked, as he ever did, serious, composed, ill-dressed, and like a gentleman. Of course he must have supposed that the present rector would make some change in his mode of living, and could not be surprised that he should have been summoned to the rectory;—but he was surprised that the summons should have come from Mrs. Clavering, and not from the rector himself. It appeared to him that the old enmity must be very enduring, if, even now, Mr. Clavering could not bring himself to see his curate on a matter of business.

Mr. Saul arrived right on time, just like the church clock he had been regulating himself, and was led into the rectory dining room, where Mrs. Clavering was sitting alone. He looked, as always, serious, composed, poorly dressed, and like a gentleman. Of course, he must have thought that the new rector would change his way of living and couldn’t be surprised to be called to the rectory; however, he was taken aback that the request came from Mrs. Clavering instead of the rector himself. It seemed to him that the old animosity must be quite lasting if Mr. Clavering still couldn’t bring himself to meet with his curate about a business matter.

"It seems a long time since we have seen you here, Mr. Saul," said Mrs. Clavering.

"It feels like it's been ages since we've seen you here, Mr. Saul," Mrs. Clavering said.

"Yes;—when I have remembered how often I used to be here, my absence has seemed long and strange."

"Yeah; when I think about how often I used to be here, my time away feels long and weird."

"It has been a source of great grief to me."

"It has been a huge source of sadness for me."

"And to me, Mrs. Clavering."

"And to me, Mrs. C."

"But, as circumstances then were, in truth it could not be avoided. Common prudence made it necessary. Don't you think so, Mr. Saul?"

"But, given the circumstances at the time, it really couldn't be helped. Common sense made it essential. Don't you agree, Mr. Saul?"

"If you ask me I must answer according to my own ideas. Common prudence should not have made it necessary,—at least not according to my view of things. Common prudence, with different people, means such different things! But I am not going to quarrel with your ideas of common prudence, Mrs. Clavering."

"If you ask me, I have to reply based on my own perspective. Common sense shouldn’t have required this—at least not in my opinion. Common sense means such different things to different people! But I’m not going to argue with your ideas of common sense, Mrs. Clavering."

Mrs. Clavering had begun badly, and was aware of it. She should have said nothing about the past. She had foreseen, from the first, the danger of doing so, but had been unable to rush at once into the golden future. "I hope we shall have no more quarrelling at any rate," she said.

Mrs. Clavering had started off on the wrong foot and knew it. She shouldn’t have brought up the past at all. She had anticipated, from the beginning, the risk of doing so, but had found it hard to jump straight into the bright future. “I hope we won’t have any more fighting, at least,” she said.

"There shall be none on my part. Only, Mrs. Clavering, you must not suppose from my saying so that I intend to give up my pretensions. A word from your daughter would make me do so, but no words from any one else."

"There won’t be any from me. Just, Mrs. Clavering, don’t think from what I’m saying that I plan to give up my claims. One word from your daughter would make me do that, but no one else’s words would."

"She ought to be very proud of such constancy on your part, Mr. Saul, and I have no doubt she will be." Mr. Saul did not understand this, and made no reply to it. "I don't know whether you have heard that Mr. Clavering intends to—give up the living."

"She should be really proud of your loyalty, Mr. Saul, and I’m sure she will be." Mr. Saul didn't get it and didn't respond. "I’m not sure if you’ve heard, but Mr. Clavering plans to— resign from the position."

"I have not heard it. I have thought it probable that he would do so."

"I haven't heard it. I thought it was likely that he would do that."

"He has made up his mind that he will. The fact is, that if he held it, he must neglect either that or the property." We will not stop at this moment to examine what Mr. Saul's ideas must have been as to the exigencies of the property, which would leave no time for the performance of such clerical duties as had fallen for some years past to the share of the rector himself. "He hopes that he may be allowed to take some part in the services,—but he means to resign the living."

"He has decided he will do it. The truth is, if he takes it on, he’ll have to neglect either that or the property." We won’t pause right now to consider what Mr. Saul must have thought about the demands of the property, which would leave no time for the clerical duties that the rector himself has been handling for the past few years. "He hopes he can participate in the services, but he plans to resign from the position."

"I suppose that will not much affect me for the little time that I have to remain."

"I guess that won't really impact me for the short time I have left."

"We think it will affect you,—and hope that it may. Mr. Clavering wishes you to accept the living."

"We believe it will have an impact on you—and we hope it does. Mr. Clavering wants you to accept the position."

"To accept the living?" And for a moment even Mr. Saul looked as though he were surprised.

"To accept the living?" For a moment, even Mr. Saul seemed surprised.

"Yes, Mr. Saul."

"Yes, Mr. Saul."

"To be rector of Clavering?"

"Be the rector of Clavering?"

"If you see no objection to such an arrangement."

"If you have no issue with that arrangement."

"It is a most munificent offer,—but as strange as it is munificent. Unless indeed—" And then some glimpse of the truth made its way into the chinks of Mr. Saul's mind.

"It’s a very generous offer—but it's as strange as it is generous. Unless indeed— And then some insight into the truth started to penetrate the gaps in Mr. Saul's mind."

"Mr. Clavering would, no doubt, have made the offer to you himself, had it not been that I can, perhaps, speak to you about dear Fanny better than he could do. Though our prudence has not been quite to your mind, you can at any rate understand that we might very much object to her marrying you when there was nothing for you to live on, even though we had no objection to yourself personally."

"Mr. Clavering probably would have made the offer to you himself, but I can maybe explain things about dear Fanny a bit better than he could. Even though our caution hasn’t been to your liking, you can at least understand that we would be quite against her marrying you when you had no means to support yourself, even though we have no personal objection to you."

"But Mr. Clavering did object on both grounds."

"But Mr. Clavering did object on both counts."

"I was not aware that he had done so; but, if so, no such objection is now made by him,—or by me. My idea is that a child should be allowed to consult her own heart, and to indulge her own choice,—provided that in doing so she does not prepare for herself a life of indigence, which must be a life of misery; and of course providing also that there be no strong personal objection."

"I didn't know he had done that; but if he did, neither he nor I have any objections now. I believe a child should be allowed to follow her own feelings and make her own choices, as long as she doesn't set herself up for a life of poverty, which would be miserable. Of course, this is also assuming there are no strong personal objections."

"A life of indigence need not be a life of misery," said Mr. Saul, with that obstinacy which formed so great a part of his character.

"A life of hardship doesn't have to be a life of misery," said Mr. Saul, with that stubbornness which was such a big part of his character.

"Well, well."

"Wow, wow."

"I am very indigent, but I am not at all miserable. If we are to be made miserable by that, what is the use of all our teaching?"

"I am very poor, but I’m not miserable at all. If that’s what makes us miserable, then what’s the point of all our education?"

"But, at any rate, a competence is comfortable."

"But anyway, having a decent income is pretty nice."

"Too comfortable!" As Mr. Saul made this exclamation, Mrs. Clavering could not but wonder at her daughter's taste. But the matter had gone too far now for any possibility of receding.

"Too comfortable!" As Mr. Saul said this, Mrs. Clavering couldn't help but wonder about her daughter's taste. But it was too late to turn back now.

"You will not refuse it, I hope, as it will be accompanied by what you say you still desire."

"You won't refuse it, I hope, since it will come with what you say you still want."

"No; I will not refuse it. And may God give her and me grace so to use the riches of this world that they become not a stumbling-block to us, and a rock of offence. It is possible that the camel should be made to go through the needle's eye. It is possible."

"No; I won’t turn it down. And may God grant her and me the grace to use the wealth of this world in a way that doesn’t become a stumbling block for us, or a source of offense. It’s possible for a camel to go through the eye of a needle. It’s possible."

"The position, you know, is not one of great wealth."

"The position, as you know, isn't one of great wealth."

"It is to me, who have barely hitherto had the means of support. Will you tell your husband from me that I will accept, and endeavour not to betray the double trust he proposes to confer on me. It is much that he should give to me his daughter. She shall be to me bone of my bone, and flesh of my flesh. If God will give me his grace thereto, I will watch over her, so that no harm shall come nigh her. I love her as the apple of my eye; and I am thankful,—very thankful that the rich gift should be made to me."

"It’s me, someone who has hardly had any support until now. Please let your husband know that I accept and will do my best not to betray the trust he wants to place in me. It means a lot that he would give me his daughter. She will be to me as close as family. If God grants me the strength, I will take care of her so that no harm comes to her. I love her dearly, and I am very grateful for this wonderful gift."

"I am sure that you love her, Mr. Saul."

"I’m sure you love her, Mr. Saul."

"But," continued he, not marking her interruption, "that other trust is one still greater, and requiring a more tender care and even a closer sympathy. I shall feel that the souls of these people will be, as it were, in my hand, and that I shall be called upon to give an account of their welfare. I will strive,—I will strive. And she, also, will be with me, to help me."

"But," he continued, not noticing her interruption, "that other trust is even bigger, needing more delicate care and a deeper sympathy. I’ll feel like the souls of these people will be, in a way, in my hands, and I’ll have to answer for their well-being. I will try—I will try. And she will also be with me to help."

When Mrs. Clavering described this scene to her husband, he shook his head; and there came over his face a smile, in which there was much of melancholy, as he said, "Ah, yes,—that is all very well now. He will settle down as other men do, I suppose, when he has four or five children around him." Such were the ideas which the experience of the outgoing and elder clergyman taught him to entertain as to the ecstatic piety of his younger brother.

When Mrs. Clavering told her husband about this scene, he shook his head. A melancholy smile crossed his face as he said, "Ah, yes—that sounds nice now. I suppose he'll settle down like other men do when he has four or five kids around him." Those were the thoughts that the experience of the outgoing and older clergyman led him to have about his younger brother’s ecstatic piety.

It was Mrs. Clavering who suggested to Mr. Saul that perhaps he would like to see Fanny. This she did when her story had been told, and he was preparing to leave her. "Certainly, if she will come to me."

It was Mrs. Clavering who suggested to Mr. Saul that he might want to see Fanny. She mentioned this after her story was told, just as he was getting ready to leave her. "Of course, if she’s willing to come to me."

"I will make no promise," said Mrs. Clavering, "but I will see." Then she went upstairs to the room where the girls were sitting, and the sacrificial lamb was sent down into the drawing-room. "I suppose if you say so, mamma—"

"I won’t make any promises," Mrs. Clavering said, "but I’ll take a look." Then she went upstairs to the room where the girls were sitting, and the designated girl was sent down into the drawing room. "I guess if you say so, mom

"I think, my dear, that you had better see him. You will meet then more comfortably afterwards." So Fanny went into the drawing-room, and Mr. Saul was sent to her there. What passed between them all readers of these pages will understand. Few young ladies, I fear, will envy Fanny Clavering her lover; but they will remember that Love will still be lord of all; and they will acknowledge that he had done much to deserve the success in life which had come in his way.

"I think, my dear, that you should see him. You’ll feel more at ease afterwards." So Fanny went into the living room, and Mr. Saul was sent to her there. What happened between them will be clear to readers. Few young women, I fear, will envy Fanny Clavering her boyfriend; but they will remember that Love will always reign supreme; and they will recognize that he had done a lot to earn the success in life that had come his way.

It was long before the old rector could reconcile himself either to the new rector or his new son-in-law. Mrs. Clavering had now so warmly taken up Fanny's part, and had so completely assumed a mother's interest in her coming marriage, that Mr. Clavering, or Sir Henry, as we may now call him, had found himself obliged to abstain from repeating to her the wonder with which he still regarded his daughter's choice. But to Harry he could still be eloquent on the subject. "Of course it's all right now," he said. "He's a very good young man, and nobody would work harder in the parish. I always thought I was very lucky to have such an assistant. But upon my word I cannot understand Fanny; I cannot indeed."

It took a long time for the old rector to accept either the new rector or his new son-in-law. Mrs. Clavering had gotten so passionately involved in Fanny's situation and had taken on a mother's interest in her upcoming marriage that Mr. Clavering, or Sir Henry, as we can now call him, felt he had to hold back from expressing to her his amazement at his daughter's choice. But he could still share his thoughts with Harry. "Of course it's all good now," he said. "He's a really good young man, and no one would work harder in the parish. I always thought I was really lucky to have such an assistant. But honestly, I just can't understand Fanny; I really can't."

"She has been taken by the religious side of her character," said Harry.

"She has really embraced the spiritual side of herself," said Harry.

"Yes, of course. And no doubt it is very gratifying to me to see that she thinks so much of religion. It should be the first consideration with all of us at all times. But she has never been used to men like Mr. Saul."

"Yes, of course. And it definitely makes me happy to see that she values religion so highly. It should always be our top priority. But she's never dealt with men like Mr. Saul."

"Nobody can deny that he is a gentleman."

"Nobody can deny that he's a gentleman."

"Yes; he is a gentleman. God forbid that I should say he was not; especially now that he is going to marry your sister. But— I don't know whether you quite understand what I mean?"

"Yes, he’s a gentleman. God forbid I say he isn’t; especially now that he’s going to marry your sister. But— I’m not sure you fully understand what I’m getting at?"

"I think I do. He isn't quite one of our sort."

"I think I do. He's not really one of us."

"How on earth she can ever have brought herself to look at him in that light!"

"How on earth could she have ever brought herself to see him that way!"

"There's no accounting for tastes, sir. And, after all, as he's to have the living, there will be nothing to regret."

"There's no accounting for tastes, sir. And, since he's getting the position, there will be nothing to regret."

"No; nothing to regret. I suppose he'll be up at the other house occasionally. I never could make anything of him when he dined at the rectory; perhaps he'll be better there. Perhaps, when he's married, he'll get into the way of drinking a glass of wine like anybody else. Dear Fanny; I hope she'll be happy. That's everything." In answer to this Harry took upon himself to assure his father that Fanny would be happy; and then they changed the conversation, and discussed the alterations which they would make in reference to the preservation of pheasants.

"No; nothing to regret. I guess he'll be over at the other house from time to time. I could never figure him out when he dined at the rectory; maybe he'll be better there. Maybe when he's married, he'll start to drink a glass of wine like everyone else. Dear Fanny; I hope she'll be happy. That's what matters." In response, Harry made sure to tell his father that Fanny would be happy; then they shifted the conversation and talked about the changes they would make regarding the preservation of pheasants.

Mr. Saul and Fanny remained long together on that occasion, and when they parted he went off about his work, not saying a word to any other person in the house, and she betook herself as fast as her feet could carry her to her own room. She said not a word either to her mother, or to her sister, or to Florence as to what had passed at that interview; but, when she was first seen by any of them, she was very grave in her demeanour, and very silent. When her father congratulated her, which he did with as much cordiality as he was able to assume, she kissed him and thanked him for his care and kindness; but even this she did almost solemnly. "Ah, I see how it is to be," said the old rector to his wife. "There are to be no more cakes and ale in the parish." Then his wife reminded him of what he himself had said of the change which would take place in Mr. Saul's ways when he should have a lot of children running about his feet. "Then I can only hope that they'll begin to run about very soon," said the old rector.

Mr. Saul and Fanny spent a long time together that day, and when they parted, he went straight to his work without saying a word to anyone else in the house, while she hurried to her own room as fast as she could. She didn’t mention anything to her mother, sister, or Florence about what happened during their conversation; but when anyone first saw her, she was very serious and quiet. When her father congratulated her, doing so with as much warmth as he could muster, she kissed him and thanked him for his care and kindness, but even that felt almost solemn. "Ah, I see how this is going to be," the old rector said to his wife. "There won’t be any more cakes and ale in the parish." Then his wife reminded him of what he had predicted about the change in Mr. Saul’s behavior once he had a lot of children running around. "Then I can only hope that they start running around very soon," said the old rector.

To her sister, Mary Fielding, Fanny said little or nothing of her coming marriage, but to Florence, who, as regarded that event, was in the same position as herself, she frequently did express her feelings,—declaring how awful to her was the responsibility of the thing she was about to do. "Of course that's quite true," said Florence, "but it doesn't make one doubt that one is right to marry."

To her sister, Mary Fielding, Fanny said very little about her upcoming marriage, but to Florence, who was in the same situation regarding that event, she often shared her feelings—expressing how overwhelming the responsibility of what she was about to do felt. "That's definitely true," Florence replied, "but it doesn't make you question whether it's right to get married."

"I don't know," said Fanny. "When I think of it, it does almost make me doubt."

"I don't know," Fanny said. "When I think about it, it almost makes me question."

"Then if I were Mr. Saul I would not let you think of it at all."

"Then if I were Mr. Saul, I wouldn't let you think about it at all."

"Ah;—that shows that you do not understand him. He would be the first to advise me to hesitate if he thought that,—that—that;—I don't know that I can quite express what I mean."

"Ah;—that shows you don’t understand him. He would be the first to tell me to think twice if he thought that,—that—that;—I’m not sure I can fully express what I mean."

"Under those circumstances Mr. Saul won't think that,—that—that—that—"

"Under those circumstances, Mr. Saul won't think that—that—that—that—"

"Oh, Florence, it is too serious for laughing. It is indeed." Then Florence also hoped that a time might come, and that shortly, in which Mr. Saul might moderate his views,—though she did not express herself exactly as the rector had done.

"Oh, Florence, this is way too serious to be laughing about. It really is." Then Florence also hoped that a time might come soon when Mr. Saul might tone down his views,—even though she didn’t say it exactly like the rector had.

Immediately after this Florence went back to Stratton, in order that she might pass what remained to her of her freedom with her mother and father, and that she might prepare herself for her wedding. The affair with her was so much hurried that she had hardly time to give her mind to those considerations which were weighing so heavily on Fanny's mind. It was felt by all the Burtons,—especially by Cecilia,—that there was need for extension of their views in regard to millinery, seeing that Florence was to marry the eldest son and heir of a baronet. And old Mrs. Burton was awed almost into quiescence by the reflections which came upon her when she thought of the breakfast, and of the presence of Sir Henry Clavering. She at once summoned her daughter-in-law from Ramsgate to her assistance, and felt that all her experience, gathered from the wedding breakfasts of so many elder daughters, would hardly carry her through the difficulties of the present occasion.

Immediately after this, Florence returned to Stratton to spend what little freedom she had left with her mom and dad, and to prepare for her wedding. The situation was moving so fast that she barely had time to think about the issues that were weighing heavily on Fanny's mind. Everyone in the Burton family—especially Cecilia—felt the need to broaden their views on fashion, given that Florence was marrying the eldest son and heir of a baronet. Old Mrs. Burton was nearly rendered speechless by the thoughts that flooded her mind when she considered the breakfast and the presence of Sir Henry Clavering. She quickly called her daughter-in-law from Ramsgate for help, feeling that all her experience from countless wedding breakfasts for older daughters wouldn’t be enough to handle the challenges of this occasion.

The two widowed sisters were still at the great house when Sir Henry Clavering with Harry and Fanny went to Stratton, but they left it on the following day. The father and son went up together to bid them farewell, on the eve of their departure, and to press upon them, over and over again, the fact that they were still to regard the Claverings of Clavering Park as their nearest relations and friends. The elder sister simply cried when this was said to her,—cried easily with plenteous tears, till the weeds which enveloped her seemed to be damp from the ever-running fountain. Hitherto, to weep had been her only refuge; but I think that even this had already become preferable to her former life. Lady Ongar assured Sir Henry, or Mr. Clavering, as he was still called till after their departure,—that she would always remember and accept his kindness. "And you will come to us?" said he. "Certainly; when I can make Hermy come. She will be better when the summer is here. And then, after that, we will think about it." On this occasion she seemed to be quite cheerful herself, and bade Harry farewell with all the frank affection of an old friend.

The two widowed sisters were still at the big house when Sir Henry Clavering, along with Harry and Fanny, went to Stratton, but they left the next day. The father and son went together to say goodbye to them the night before their departure, repeatedly reminding them that they should still consider the Claverings of Clavering Park as their closest relatives and friends. The older sister just cried when she heard this—she cried easily, shedding plenty of tears, until the weeds surrounding her felt damp from her constant weeping. Up to this point, crying had been her only escape; but I think even that had become preferable to her previous life. Lady Ongar told Sir Henry, or Mr. Clavering, as he was still called until after they left, that she would always remember and appreciate his kindness. “And you will come to visit us?” he asked. “Of course; when I can bring Hermy along. She'll be better once summer arrives. Then after that, we’ll figure things out,” she replied. On this occasion, she seemed genuinely cheerful, and she said goodbye to Harry with all the warmth and affection of an old friend.

"I have given up the house in Bolton Street," she said to him.

"I've given up the house on Bolton Street," she told him.

"And where do you mean to live?"

"And where do you plan to live?"

"Anywhere; just as it may suit Hermy. What difference does it make? We are going to Tenby now, and though Tenby seems to me to have as few attractions as any place I ever knew, I daresay we shall stay there, simply because we shall be there. That is the consideration which weighs most with such old women as we are. Good-by, Harry."

"Anywhere; whatever works for Hermy. What does it matter? We’re heading to Tenby now, and even though Tenby seems to have as little to offer as any place I’ve ever known, I guess we’ll stay there, just because we’ll be there. That’s what matters most to old ladies like us. Goodbye, Harry."

"Good-by, Julia. I hope that I may yet see you,—you and Hermy, happy before long."

"Goodbye, Julia. I hope I'll see you again—you and Hermy, happy soon."

"I don't know much about happiness, Harry. There comes a dream of it sometimes,—such as you have got now. But I will answer for this: you shall never hear of my being down-hearted. At least not on my own account," she added in a whisper. "Poor Hermy may sometimes drag me down. But I will do my best. And, Harry, tell your wife that I shall write to her occasionally,—once a year, or something like that; so that she need not be afraid. Good-by, Harry."

"I don’t know a lot about happiness, Harry. Sometimes, a dream of it comes along—just like the one you have now. But I can promise you this: you’ll never hear me feeling sorry for myself. At least not for my own reasons," she said quietly. "Poor Hermy might sometimes bring me down. But I’ll do my best. And, Harry, tell your wife that I’ll write to her every now and then—maybe once a year or something like that; so she doesn’t have to worry. Goodbye, Harry."

"Good-by, Julia." And so they parted.

"Goodbye, Julia." And so they went their separate ways.

Immediately on her arrival at Tenby, Lady Ongar communicated to Mr. Turnbull her intention of giving back to the Courton family, not only the place called Ongar Park, but also the whole of her income with the exception of eight hundred a year, so that in that respect she might be equal to her sister. This brought Mr. Turnbull down to Tenby, and there was interview after interview between the countess and the lawyer. The proposition, however, was made to the Courtons, and was absolutely refused by them. Ongar Park was accepted on behalf of the mother of the present earl; but as regarded the money, the widow of the late earl was assured by the elder surviving brother that no one doubted her right to it, or would be a party to accepting it from her. "Then," said Lady Ongar, "it will accumulate in my hands, and I can leave it as I please in my will."

As soon as she arrived in Tenby, Lady Ongar informed Mr. Turnbull that she planned to return not only Ongar Park to the Courton family but also her entire income, except for eight hundred a year, so she could be on equal footing with her sister. This prompted Mr. Turnbull to come to Tenby, leading to several meetings between the countess and the lawyer. However, the offer was presented to the Courtons, and they flatly refused it. Ongar Park was accepted on behalf of the current earl's mother, but regarding the money, the late earl's widow was told by the elder surviving brother that no one questioned her right to it or would agree to accept it from her. "Then," Lady Ongar said, "it will pile up in my hands, and I can leave it however I want in my will."

"As to that, no one can control you," said her brother-in-law—who went to Tenby to see her; "but you must not be angry, if I advise you not to make any such resolution. Such hoards never have good results." This good result, however, did come from the effort which the poor broken-spirited woman was making,—that an intimacy, and at last a close friendship, was formed between her and the relatives of her deceased lord.

"As for that, no one can control you," said her brother-in-law—who went to Tenby to see her; "but please don’t be upset if I suggest that you shouldn’t make any such decision. Those kinds of choices never end well." However, a positive outcome did come from the effort that the poor, broken-spirited woman was making—an intimacy and eventually a close friendship developed between her and the relatives of her late husband.

And now my story is done. My readers will easily understand what would be the future life of Harry Clavering and his wife after the completion of that tour in Italy, and the birth of the heir,—the preparations for which made the tour somewhat shorter than Harry had intended. His father, of course, gave up to him the shooting, and the farming of the home farm,—and after a while, the management of the property. Sir Henry preached occasionally,—believing himself to preach much oftener than he did,—and usually performed some portion of the morning service.

And now my story is over. My readers will easily understand what Harry Clavering and his wife’s future life would be like after their trip to Italy and the birth of their heir, which made the trip a bit shorter than Harry had planned. His father, of course, passed the shooting and the management of the family farm to him, and eventually, he took over managing the property. Sir Henry preached from time to time—thinking he preached more often than he actually did—and typically led part of the morning service.

"Oh, yes," said Theodore Burton, in answer to some comfortable remark from his wife; "Providence has done very well for Florence. And Providence has done very well for him also;—but Providence was making a great mistake when she expected him to earn his bread."

"Oh, yes," said Theodore Burton, responding to a comforting remark from his wife; "Fate has treated Florence very well. And Fate has treated him well too;—but Fate made a big mistake in thinking he could earn his living."

 

 



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