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HIS MASTERPIECE
By Émile Zola
Edited, With a Preface, By Ernest Alfred Vizetelly
Contents
PREFACE |
I |
II |
III |
IV |
V |
VI |
VII |
VIII |
IX |
X |
XI |
XII |
PREFACE
‘HIS MASTERPIECE,’ which in the original French bears the title of L’Œuvre, is a strikingly accurate story of artistic life in Paris during the latter years of the Second Empire. Amusing at times, extremely pathetic and even painful at others, it not only contributes a necessary element to the Rougon-Macquart series of novels—a series illustrative of all phases of life in France within certain dates—but it also represents a particular period of M. Zola’s own career and work. Some years, indeed, before the latter had made himself known at all widely as a novelist, he had acquired among Parisian painters and sculptors considerable notoriety as a revolutionary art critic, a fervent champion of that ‘Open-air’ school which came into being during the Second Empire, and which found its first real master in Edouard Manet, whose then derided works are regarded, in these later days, as masterpieces. Manet died before his genius was fully recognised; still he lived long enough to reap some measure of recognition and to see his influence triumph in more than one respect among his brother artists. Indeed, few if any painters left a stronger mark on the art of the second half of the nineteenth century than he did, even though the school, which he suggested rather than established, lapsed largely into mere impressionism—a term, by the way, which he himself coined already in 1858; for it is an error to attribute it—as is often done—to his friend and junior, Claude Monet.
‘HIS MASTERPIECE,’ which in the original French is titled L’Œuvre, is a remarkably accurate story about the artistic life in Paris during the later years of the Second Empire. It’s amusing at times, very touching, and even painful at others. Not only does it add an essential element to the Rougon-Macquart series of novels—which illustrates all aspects of life in France during specific dates—but it also reflects a particular period in M. Zola’s own career. Some years before he became widely known as a novelist, he gained a significant reputation among Parisian painters and sculptors as a revolutionary art critic and a passionate supporter of the ‘Open-air’ school that emerged during the Second Empire, whose first true master was Edouard Manet. His works, once mocked, are now celebrated as masterpieces. Manet passed away before his genius was fully acknowledged, but he lived long enough to earn some recognition and to see his influence succeed in various ways among his fellow artists. In fact, few, if any, painters made a stronger impact on the art of the second half of the nineteenth century than he did, even though the school he inspired rather than founded eventually mostly turned into mere impressionism—a term he himself coined back in 1858; it’s a mistake to credit it, as is often done, to his friend and junior, Claude Monet.
It was at the time of the Salon of 1866 that M. Zola, who criticised that exhibition in the Evenement newspaper,* first came to the front as an art critic, slashing out, to right and left, with all the vigour of a born combatant, and championing M. Manet—whom he did not as yet know personally—with a fervour born of the strongest convictions. He had come to the conclusion that the derided painter was being treated with injustice, and that opinion sufficed to throw him into the fray; even as, in more recent years, the belief that Captain Dreyfus was innocent impelled him in like manner to plead that unfortunate officer’s cause. When M. Zola first championed Manet and his disciples he was only twenty-six years old, yet he did not hesitate to pit himself against men who were regarded as the most eminent painters and critics of France; and although (even as in the Dreyfus case) the only immediate result of his campaign was to bring him hatred and contumely, time, which always has its revenges, has long since shown how right he was in forecasting the ultimate victory of Manet and his principal methods.
It was during the Salon of 1866 that M. Zola, who criticized that exhibition in the Evenement newspaper,* first emerged as an art critic, fiercely attacking both sides with the energy of a natural fighter, and passionately supporting M. Manet—whom he did not yet know personally—with a fervor rooted in his strong beliefs. He concluded that the scorned painter was being treated unjustly, and that conviction propelled him into the battle; just as, in more recent years, his belief in Captain Dreyfus's innocence drove him to advocate for that unfortunate officer. When M. Zola first stood up for Manet and his followers, he was only twenty-six years old, yet he boldly took on the most celebrated painters and critics in France. While (similar to the Dreyfus case) the immediate outcome of his campaign brought him hatred and scorn, time, which always has a way of settling scores, has long shown how right he was in predicting the eventual triumph of Manet and his key techniques.
* Some of the articles will be found in the volume of his miscellaneous writings entitled Mes Haines.
* Some of the articles will be found in the collection of his various writings titled Mes Haines.
In those days M. Zola’s most intimate friend—a companion of his boyhood and youth—was Paul Cézanne, a painter who developed talent as an impressionist; and the lives of Cézanne and Manet, as well as that of a certain rather dissolute engraver, who sat for the latter’s famous picture Le Bon Bock, suggested to M. Zola the novel which he has called L’Œuvre. Claude Lantier, the chief character in the book, is, of course, neither Cézanne nor Manet, but from the careers of those two painters, M. Zola has borrowed many little touches and incidents.* The poverty which falls to Claude’s lot is taken from the life of Cézanne, for Manet—the only son of a judge—was almost wealthy. Moreover, Manet married very happily, and in no wise led the pitiful existence which in the novel is ascribed to Claude Lantier and his helpmate, Christine. The original of the latter was a poor woman who for many years shared the life of the engraver to whom I have alluded; and, in that connection, it as well to mention that what may be called the Bennecourt episode of the novel is virtually photographed from life.
Back in the day, M. Zola's closest friend—someone he had known since childhood—was Paul Cézanne, a painter who honed his skills as an impressionist. The lives of Cézanne and Manet, along with that of a somewhat dissolute engraver who posed for Manet’s famous painting Le Bon Bock, inspired M. Zola to write the novel he called L’Œuvre. The main character, Claude Lantier, isn't exactly Cézanne or Manet, but M. Zola borrowed many details and events from the careers of these two artists. The poverty that Claude experiences mirrors Cézanne's life, while Manet—the only child of a judge—was quite well-off. Additionally, Manet had a happy marriage and didn’t live the tragic life that Zola assigns to Claude Lantier and his partner, Christine. The character of Christine was based on a poor woman who shared the life of the aforementioned engraver for many years; also, it’s worth mentioning that what might be called the Bennecourt episode in the novel is almost a direct snapshot from real life.
* So far as Manet is concerned, the curious reader may consult M. Antonin Proust’s interesting ‘Souvenirs,’ published in the Revue Blanche, early in 1897.
* If you're interested in Manet, you can check out M. Antonin Proust's fascinating 'Souvenirs,' published in the Revue Blanche in early 1897.
Whilst, however, Claude Lantier, the hero of L’Œuvre, is unlike Manet in so many respects, there is a close analogy between the artistic theories and practices of the real painter and the imaginary one. Several of Claude’s pictures are Manet’s, slightly modified. For instance, the former’s painting, ‘In the Open Air,’ is almost a replica of the latter’s Déjeuner sur l’Herbe (‘A Lunch on the Grass’), shown at the Salon of the Rejected in 1863. Again, many of the sayings put into Claude’s mouth in the novel are really sayings of Manet’s. And Claude’s fate, at the end of the book, is virtually that of a moody young fellow who long assisted Manet in his studio, preparing his palette, cleaning his brushes, and so forth. This lad, whom Manet painted in L’Enfant aux Cerises (‘The Boy with the Cherries’), had artistic aspirations of his own and, being unable to justify them, ended by hanging himself.
While Claude Lantier, the main character of L’Œuvre, is different from Manet in many ways, there is a strong similarity between the artistic theories and practices of the real painter and the fictional one. Many of Claude’s paintings are based on Manet’s, with slight changes. For example, Claude’s painting, ‘In the Open Air,’ is nearly identical to Manet’s Déjeuner sur l’Herbe (‘A Lunch on the Grass’), which was displayed at the Salon of the Rejected in 1863. Furthermore, many of the quotes attributed to Claude in the novel are actually Manet’s words. By the end of the story, Claude’s fate mirrors that of a moody young man who once helped Manet in his studio by preparing his palette, cleaning his brushes, and so on. This young man, whom Manet depicted in L’Enfant aux Cerises (‘The Boy with the Cherries’), had his own artistic ambitions, and when he could not fulfill them, he ultimately took his own life.
I had just a slight acquaintance with Manet, whose studio I first visited early in my youth, and though the exigencies of life led me long ago to cast aside all artistic ambition of my own, I have been for more than thirty years on friendly terms with members of the French art world. Thus it would be comparatively easy for me to identify a large number of the characters and the incidents figuring in ‘His Masterpiece’; but I doubt if such identification would have any particular interest for English readers. I will just mention that Mahoudeau, the sculptor, is, in a measure, Solari, another friend of M. Zola’s boyhood and youth; that Fagerolles, in his main features, is Gervex; and that Bongrand is a commingling of Courbet, Cabanel and Gustave Flaubert. For instance, his so-called ‘Village Wedding’ is suggested by Courbet’s ‘Funeral at Ornans’; his friendship for Claude is Cabanel’s friendship for Manet; whilst some of his mannerisms, such as his dislike for the praise accorded to certain of his works, are simply those of Flaubert, who (like Balzac in the case of Eugenie Grandet) almost invariably lost his temper if one ventured to extol Madame Bovary in his presence. Courbet, by the way, so far as disposition goes, crops up again in M. Zola’s pages in the person of Champbouvard, a sculptor, who, artistically, is a presentment of Clesinger.
I had only a casual acquaintance with Manet, whose studio I first visited when I was young. Although life’s demands led me to give up my own artistic ambitions long ago, I've maintained friendly relationships with many people in the French art scene for over thirty years. Because of this, it would be relatively easy for me to identify many of the characters and events in ‘His Masterpiece’; however, I doubt that such identification would particularly interest English readers. I’ll just mention that Mahoudeau, the sculptor, is somewhat like Solari, another friend from M. Zola’s childhood; that Fagerolles, in his main traits, resembles Gervex; and that Bongrand is a mix of Courbet, Cabanel, and Gustave Flaubert. For example, his so-called ‘Village Wedding’ is inspired by Courbet’s ‘Funeral at Ornans’; his friendship with Claude mirrors Cabanel’s friendship with Manet; while some of his mannerisms, like his dislike for the praise given to certain of his works, resemble Flaubert's, who (like Balzac regarding Eugenie Grandet) would almost always lose his temper if anyone praised Madame Bovary in his presence. By the way, Courbet, in terms of personality, appears again in M. Zola’s work through the character of Champbouvard, a sculptor who artistically represents Clesinger.
I now come to a personage of a very different character, Pierre Sandoz, clerk, journalist, and novelist; and Sandoz, it may be frankly admitted, is simply M. Zola himself. Personal appearance, life, habits, opinions, all are those of the novelist at a certain period of his career; and for this reason, no doubt, many readers of ‘His Masterpiece’ will find Sandoz the most interesting personage in the book. It is needless, I think, to enter into particulars on the subject. The reader may take it from me that everything attributed in the following pages to Pierre Sandoz was done, experienced, felt or said by Émile Zola. In this respect, then ‘His Masterpiece’ is virtually M. Zola’s ‘David Copperfield’—the book into which he has put most of his real life. I may also mention, perhaps, that the long walks on the quays of Paris which in the narrative are attributed to Claude Lantier are really M. Zola’s walks; for, in his youth, when he vainly sought employment after failing in his examinations, he was wont, at times of great discouragement, to roam the Paris quays, studying their busy life and their picturesque vistas, whenever he was not poring over the second-hand books set out for sale upon their parapets. From a purely literary standpoint, the pictures of the quays and the Seine to be found in L’Œuvre are perhaps the best bits of the book, though it is all of interest, because it is essentially a livre vecu, a work really ‘lived’ by its author. And if in the majority of its characters, those readers possessing some real knowledge of French art life find one man’s qualities blended with another’s defects, the appearance of a third, and the habits of a fourth, the whole none the less makes a picture of great fidelity to life and truth. This is the Parisian art world as it really was, with nothing improbable or overstrained in the narrative, save its very first chapter, in which romanticism is certainly allowed full play.
I now come to a character of a very different kind, Pierre Sandoz, clerk, journalist, and novelist; and it's fair to say that Sandoz is essentially M. Zola himself. His appearance, lifestyle, habits, and opinions all reflect those of the novelist during a certain time in his career; for this reason, many readers of ‘His Masterpiece’ will likely find Sandoz the most intriguing character in the book. I don't think it’s necessary to go into specifics about this. Trust me when I say that everything attributed to Pierre Sandoz in the following pages was done, experienced, felt, or said by Émile Zola. In this sense, ‘His Masterpiece’ is essentially M. Zola’s ‘David Copperfield’—the book where he poured most of his real life. I should also note that the long walks on the Paris quays that are described in the story as belonging to Claude Lantier are actually M. Zola’s walks; during his youth, when he unsuccessfully sought employment after failing his exams, he would at times of great discouragement wander the Paris quays, observing their busy life and scenic views, whenever he wasn’t lost in the second-hand books displayed for sale on their ledges. From a purely literary perspective, the depictions of the quays and the Seine in L’Œuvre are probably the best parts of the book, though everything is engaging because it is essentially a livre vecu, a work truly ‘lived’ by its author. And if readers with some real knowledge of French artistic life find that many of the characters combine one person’s traits with another’s flaws, the appearance of a third, and the habits of a fourth, the overall picture still provides a strikingly accurate representation of life and truth. This is the Parisian art world as it genuinely was, with nothing far-fetched or exaggerated in the narrative, except perhaps for its very first chapter, where romanticism is certainly allowed to flourish.
It is quite possible that some readers may not judge Claude Lantier, the ‘hero,’ very favourably; he is like the dog in the fable who forsakes the substance for the shadow; but it should be borne in mind that he is only in part responsible for his actions, for the fatal germ of insanity has been transmitted to him from his great-grandmother. He is, indeed, the son of Gervaise, the heroine of L’Assommoir (‘The Dram Shop’), by her lover Lantier. And Gervaise, it may be remembered, was the daughter of Antoine Macquart (of ‘The Fortune of the Rougons’ and ‘Dr. Pascal’), the latter being the illegitimate son of Adelaide Fouque, from whom sprang the insanity of the Rougon-Macquarts. At the same time, whatever view may be taken of Claude’s artistic theories, whatever interest his ultimate fate may inspire, it cannot be denied that his opinions on painting are very ably expressed, and that his ‘case,’ from a pathological point of view, is diagnosticated by M. Zola with all the skill of a physician. Moreover, there can be but one opinion concerning the helpmate of his life, the poor devoted Christine; and no one possessed of feeling will be able to read the history of little Jacques unmoved.
It's quite likely that some readers might not have a very positive view of Claude Lantier, the 'hero'; he resembles the dog in the fable that sacrifices the real deal for an illusion. However, it's important to remember that he is only partly accountable for his actions because the tragic seed of insanity was passed down to him from his great-grandmother. He is, in fact, the son of Gervaise, the heroine of L’Assommoir ('The Dram Shop'), and her lover Lantier. Gervaise, as a reminder, was the daughter of Antoine Macquart (from 'The Fortune of the Rougons' and 'Dr. Pascal'), who was the illegitimate son of Adelaide Fouque, the source of the insanity in the Rougon-Macquarts. At the same time, no matter what criticism is directed at Claude's artistic theories or what interest his eventual fate may generate, it's undeniable that his views on painting are very well articulated, and that his 'case,' from a medical standpoint, is analyzed by M. Zola with all the expertise of a doctor. Furthermore, there can be only one view regarding the companion in his life, the poor devoted Christine; and anyone with a heart will find it impossible to read the story of little Jacques without feeling something.
Stories of artistic life are not as a rule particularly popular with English readers, but this is not surprising when one remembers that those who take a genuine interest in art, in this country, are still a small minority. Quite apart from artistic matters, however, there is, I think, an abundance of human interest in the pages of ‘His Masterpiece,’ and thus I venture to hope that the present version, which I have prepared as carefully as my powers permit, will meet with the favour of those who have supported me, for a good many years now, in my endeavours to make the majority of M. Zola’s works accessible in this country.
Stories about the lives of artists aren't usually very popular with English readers, but that's not surprising when you consider that those who genuinely care about art in this country are still a small minority. Aside from art-related topics, though, I believe there's a lot of human interest in the pages of ‘His Masterpiece,’ and so I hope that this version, which I've worked on as carefully as I can, will be appreciated by those who have supported me for many years in my efforts to make most of M. Zola’s works available in this country.
E. A. V.
EAV
MERTON, SURREY.
Merton, Surrey.
HIS MASTERPIECE
I
CLAUDE was passing in front of the Hôtel de Ville, and the clock was striking two o’clock in the morning when the storm burst forth. He had been roaming forgetfully about the Central Markets, during that burning July night, like a loitering artist enamoured of nocturnal Paris. Suddenly the raindrops came down, so large and thick, that he took to his heels and rushed, wildly bewildered, along the Quai de la Grève. But on reaching the Pont Louis Philippe he pulled up, ragefully breathless; he considered this fear of the rain to be idiotic; and so amid the pitch-like darkness, under the lashing shower which drowned the gas-jets, he crossed the bridge slowly, with his hands dangling by his side.
CLAUDE was walking past the Hôtel de Ville, and the clock was striking two in the morning when the storm hit. He had been wandering around the Central Markets, lost in thought on that sweltering July night, like a wandering artist in love with nighttime Paris. Suddenly, the raindrops came pouring down, so big and heavy, that he took off running, completely disoriented, along the Quai de la Grève. But when he reached the Pont Louis Philippe, he stopped, panting with anger; he thought this fear of the rain was ridiculous. So, in the pitch-black darkness, under the relentless downpour that drowned out the gas lamps, he slowly crossed the bridge, his hands hanging by his sides.
He had only a few more steps to go. As he was turning on to the Quai Bourbon, on the Isle of St. Louis, a sharp flash of lightning illumined the straight, monotonous line of old houses bordering the narrow road in front of the Seine. It blazed upon the panes of the high, shutterless windows, showing up the melancholy frontages of the old-fashioned dwellings in all their details; here a stone balcony, there the railing of a terrace, and there a garland sculptured on a frieze. The painter had his studio close by, under the eaves of the old Hôtel du Martoy, nearly at the corner of the Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête.* So he went on while the quay, after flashing forth for a moment, relapsed into darkness, and a terrible thunder-clap shook the drowsy quarter.
He had just a few more steps to take. As he turned onto the Quai Bourbon on the Isle of St. Louis, a bright flash of lightning lit up the straight, dull line of old houses lining the narrow road by the Seine. It lit up the panes of the tall, shutterless windows, revealing the sad facades of the old-fashioned buildings in all their detail: a stone balcony here, a terrace railing there, and a garland carved on a frieze over there. The painter had his studio nearby, under the eaves of the old Hôtel du Martoy, nearly at the corner of the Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête.* So he continued on as the quay, after lighting up for a moment, fell back into darkness, and a loud clap of thunder rattled the sleepy neighborhood.
* The street of the Headless woman.—ED.
* The street of the Headless Woman.—ED.
When Claude, blinded by the rain, got to his door—a low, rounded door, studded with iron—he fumbled for the bell knob, and he was exceedingly surprised—indeed, he started—on finding a living, breathing body huddled against the woodwork. Then, by the light of a second flash, he perceived a tall young girl, dressed in black, and drenched already, who was shivering with fear. When a second thunder-clap had shaken both of them, Claude exclaimed:
When Claude, unable to see due to the rain, reached his door—a low, rounded door with iron studs—he struggled to find the doorbell. He was really surprised—actually, he jumped—when he discovered a living, breathing person huddled against the door. Then, in the light of another flash of lightning, he saw a tall young girl in black, already soaked, who was trembling with fear. After a second clap of thunder shook both of them, Claude exclaimed:
‘How you frighten one! Who are you, and what do you want?’
‘You really scare me! Who are you, and what do you want?’
He could no longer see her; he only heard her sob, and stammer:
He couldn't see her anymore; he could only hear her crying and stumbling over her words:
‘Oh, monsieur, don’t hurt me. It’s the fault of the driver, whom I hired at the station, and who left me at this door, after ill-treating me. Yes, a train ran off the rails, near Nevers. We were four hours late, and a person who was to wait for me had gone. Oh, dear me; I have never been in Paris before, and I don’t know where I am....’
‘Oh, sir, please don’t hurt me. It’s the driver’s fault, the one I hired at the station, who dropped me off at this door after mistreating me. Yes, a train derailed near Nevers. We were four hours late, and the person who was supposed to meet me had left. Oh my, I’ve never been to Paris before, and I don’t know where I am....’
Another blinding flash cut her short, and with dilated eyes she stared, terror-stricken, at that part of the strange capital, that violet-tinted apparition of a fantastic city. The rain had ceased falling. On the opposite bank of the Seine was the Quai des Ormes, with its small grey houses variegated below by the woodwork of their shops and with their irregular roofs boldly outlined above, while the horizon suddenly became clear on the left as far as the blue slate eaves of the Hôtel de Ville, and on the right as far as the leaden-hued dome of St. Paul. What startled her most of all, however, was the hollow of the stream, the deep gap in which the Seine flowed, black and turgid, from the heavy piles of the Pont Marie, to the light arches of the new Pont Louis Philippe. Strange masses peopled the river, a sleeping flotilla of small boats and yawls, a floating washhouse, and a dredger moored to the quay. Then, farther down, against the other bank, were lighters, laden with coals, and barges full of mill stone, dominated as it were by the gigantic arm of a steam crane. But, suddenly, everything disappeared again.
Another blinding flash interrupted her, and with wide eyes, she stared, filled with fear, at that part of the strange city, a violet-tinted vision of a fantastical place. The rain had stopped. On the opposite bank of the Seine was the Quai des Ormes, with its small gray houses highlighted by the colorful woodwork of their shops below and their uneven roofs boldly outlined above. The horizon suddenly cleared on the left, stretching to the blue slate eaves of the Hôtel de Ville, and on the right to the dull-colored dome of St. Paul. What shocked her the most, however, was the depth of the river, the dark and murky Seine flowing from the heavy supports of the Pont Marie to the light arches of the new Pont Louis Philippe. Odd shapes populated the river: a sleeping fleet of small boats and yawls, a floating laundry, and a dredger moored to the quay. Then, farther down, on the other bank, were lighters loaded with coal and barges filled with millstone, all overshadowed by the colossal arm of a steam crane. But suddenly, everything disappeared again.
Claude had an instinctive distrust of women—that story of an accident, of a belated train and a brutal cabman, seemed to him a ridiculous invention. At the second thunder-clap the girl had shrunk farther still into her corner, absolutely terrified.
Claude had an instinctive distrust of women—that story about the accident, the delayed train, and the rough taxi driver felt to him like a ridiculous fabrication. At the second clap of thunder, the girl had pulled herself even farther into her corner, completely terrified.
‘But you cannot stop here all night,’ he said.
‘But you can't stay here all night,’ he said.
She sobbed still more and stammered, ‘I beseech you, monsieur, take me to Passy. That’s where I was going.’
She cried even harder and stammered, ‘Please, sir, take me to Passy. That’s where I was headed.’
He shrugged his shoulders. Did she take him for a fool? Mechanically, however, he turned towards the Quai des Célestins, where there was a cabstand. Not the faintest glimmer of a lamp to be seen.
He shrugged his shoulders. Did she think he was an idiot? Automatically, though, he turned toward the Quai des Célestins, where there was a taxi stand. Not even the faintest glimmer of a light to be seen.
‘To Passy, my dear? Why not to Versailles? Where do you think one can pick up a cab at this time of night, and in such weather?’
‘To Passy, my dear? Why not to Versailles? Where do you think we can find a cab at this time of night, and in this weather?’
Her only answer was a shriek; for a fresh flash of lightning had almost blinded her, and this time the tragic city had seemed to her to be spattered with blood. An immense chasm had been revealed, the two arms of the river stretching far away amidst the lurid flames of a conflagration. The smallest details had appeared: the little closed shutters of the Quai des Ormes, and the two openings of the Rue de la Masure, and the Rue du Paon-Blanc, which made breaks in the line of frontages; then near the Pont Marie one could have counted the leaves on the lofty plane trees, which there form a bouquet of magnificent verdure; while on the other side, beneath the Pont Louis Philippe, at the Mail, the barges, ranged in a quadruple line, had flared with the piles of yellow apples with which they were heavily laden. And there was also the ripple of the water, the high chimney of the floating washhouse, the tightened chain of the dredger, the heaps of sand on the banks, indeed, an extraordinary agglomeration of things, quite a little world filling the great gap which seemed to stretch from one horizon to the other. But the sky became dark again, and the river flowed on, all obscurity, amid the crashing of the thunder.
Her only response was a scream; a new flash of lightning had nearly blinded her, and this time the tragic city looked to her like it was splattered with blood. A huge chasm had opened up, with the two arms of the river stretching far away amidst the bright flames of a fire. She could see the smallest details: the little closed shutters of the Quai des Ormes, the two openings of the Rue de la Masure, and the Rue du Paon-Blanc that broke the line of buildings; then near the Pont Marie, one could even count the leaves on the tall plane trees that formed a beautiful cluster of greenery; while on the other side, beneath the Pont Louis Philippe, at the Mail, the barges lined up in a quadruple row were stacked high with piles of yellow apples. There was also the ripple of the water, the tall chimney of the floating washhouse, the tight chain of the dredger, the piles of sand along the banks, indeed, an extraordinary collection of things, a little world filling the large gap that seemed to stretch from one horizon to the other. But the sky darkened again, and the river continued to flow, all murky, amid the rumbling of the thunder.
‘Thank heaven it’s over. Oh, heaven! what’s to become of me?’
‘Thank goodness it’s over. Oh no! What’s going to happen to me?’
Just then the rain began to fall again, so stiffly and impelled by so strong a wind that it swept along the quay with the violence of water escaping through an open lock.
Just then, the rain started falling again, so fiercely and driven by such a strong wind that it rushed along the dock like water gushing through an open lock.
‘Come, let me get in,’ said Claude; ‘I can stand this no longer.’
‘Come on, let me in,’ said Claude; ‘I can't take this anymore.’
Both were getting drenched. By the flickering light of the gas lamp at the corner of the Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête the young man could see the water dripping from the girl’s dress, which was clinging to her skin, in the deluge that swept against the door. He was seized with compassion. Had he not once picked up a cur on such a stormy night as this? Yet he felt angry with himself for softening. He never had anything to do with women; he treated them all as if ignorant of their existence, with a painful timidity which he disguised under a mask of bravado. And that girl must really think him a downright fool, to bamboozle him with that story of adventure—only fit for a farce. Nevertheless, he ended by saying, ‘That’s enough. You had better come in out of the wet. You can sleep in my rooms.’
Both were getting soaked. By the flickering light of the gas lamp at the corner of Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête, the young man could see water dripping from the girl's dress, which was stuck to her skin, in the downpour that slammed against the door. He was filled with sympathy. Hadn’t he once rescued a stray dog on a stormy night like this? Yet he felt angry with himself for being soft. He never got involved with women; he treated them as if they didn’t exist, masking his painful shyness with a facade of bravado. And that girl must really think he was a complete fool to fall for that ridiculous story of adventure—more suited for a comedy. Still, he finally said, “That’s enough. You should come in out of the rain. You can stay in my place.”
But at this the girl became even more frightened, and threw up her arms.
But at this, the girl got even more scared and threw up her arms.
‘In your rooms? Oh! good heavens. No, no; it’s impossible. I beseech you, monsieur, take me to Passy. Let me beg of you.’
‘In your rooms? Oh! Good heavens. No, no; that’s impossible. I beg you, sir, take me to Passy. Please, I’m asking you.’
But Claude became angry. Why did she make all this fuss, when he was willing to give her shelter? He had already rung the bell twice. At last the door opened and he pushed the girl before him.
But Claude got angry. Why was she making such a big deal when he was ready to give her a place to stay? He had already rung the bell twice. Finally, the door opened and he shoved the girl in front of him.
‘No, no, monsieur; I tell you, no—’
‘No, no, sir; I’m telling you, no—’
But another flash dazzled her, and when the thunder growled she bounded inside, scarce knowing what she was about. The heavy door had closed upon them, she was standing under a large archway in complete darkness.
But another flash blinded her, and when the thunder rumbled, she rushed inside, barely aware of what she was doing. The heavy door had shut behind them, and she was standing under a large archway in total darkness.
‘It’s I, Madame Joseph,’ cried Claude to the doorkeeper. Then he added, in a whisper, ‘Give me your hand, we have to cross the courtyard.’
‘It’s me, Madame Joseph,’ shouted Claude to the doorkeeper. Then he added, in a whisper, ‘Give me your hand, we need to cross the courtyard.’
The girl did as she was told; she no longer resisted; she was overwhelmed, worn out. Once more they encountered the diluvian rain, as they ran side by side as hard as they could across the yard. It was a baronial courtyard, huge, and surrounded with stone arcades, indistinct amidst the gloom. However, they came to a narrow passage without a door, and he let go her hand. She could hear him trying to strike some matches, and swearing. They were all damp. It was necessary for them to grope their way upstairs.
The girl did what she was told; she didn’t resist anymore; she was exhausted, worn out. Once again, they faced the pouring rain as they ran side by side as fast as they could across the yard. It was a large, grand courtyard, surrounded by stone arches, barely visible in the darkness. However, they reached a narrow passage with no door, and he let go of her hand. She could hear him trying to light some matches, cursing. They were all wet. They needed to feel their way upstairs.
‘Take hold of the banisters, and be careful,’ said Claude; ‘the steps are very high.’
‘Grab the handrails and watch your step,’ said Claude; ‘the stairs are really steep.’
The staircase, a very narrow one, a former servants’ staircase, was divided into three lofty flights, which she climbed, stumbling, with unskilful, weary limbs. Then he warned her that they had to turn down a long passage. She kept behind him, touching the walls on both sides with her outstretched hands, as she advanced along that endless passage which bent and came back to the front of the building on the quay. Then there were still other stairs right under the roof—creaking, shaky wooden stairs, which had no banister, and suggested the unplaned rungs of a miller’s ladder. The landing at the top was so small that the girl knocked against the young man, as he fumbled in his pocket for his key. At last, however, he opened the door.
The staircase, which was very narrow and used to be the servants' staircase, was made up of three high flights. She climbed them, stumbling with her tired, clumsy limbs. Then he told her they needed to turn down a long hallway. She followed him, brushing her outstretched hands against the walls on both sides as she made her way down that endless corridor that curved back to the front of the building facing the quay. There were more stairs right under the roof—creaky, shaky wooden stairs with no handrail, reminiscent of the rough rungs of a miller's ladder. The landing at the top was so small that the girl bumped into the young man as he rummaged through his pocket for his key. Finally, he managed to open the door.
‘Don’t come in, but wait, else you’ll hurt yourself again.’
‘Don’t come in, just wait, or you’ll hurt yourself again.’
She did not stir. She was panting for breath, her heart was beating fast, there was a buzzing in her ears, and she felt indeed exhausted by that ascent in the dense gloom. It seemed to her as if she had been climbing for hours, in such a maze, amidst such a turning and twisting of stairs that she would never be able to find her way down again. Inside the studio there was a shuffling of heavy feet, a rustling of hands groping in the dark, a clatter of things being tumbled about, accompanied by stifled objurgations. At last the doorway was lighted up.
She didn’t move. She was out of breath, her heart was racing, there was a buzzing in her ears, and she felt completely worn out from that climb in the thick darkness. It felt like she had been climbing for hours, caught in such a maze with so many twists and turns in the stairs that she would never be able to find her way back down. Inside the studio, there was the sound of heavy footsteps shuffling, hands making rustling noises in the dark, and things clattering around, mixed with muffled curses. Finally, the doorway lit up.
‘Come in, it’s all right now.’
“Come in, it’s okay now.”
She went in and looked around her, without distinguishing anything. The solitary candle burned dim in that garret, more than fifteen feet high, and filled with a confused jumble of things whose big shadows showed fantastically on the walls, which were painted in grey distemper. No, she did not distinguish anything. She mechanically raised her eyes to the large studio-window, against which the rain was beating with a deafening roll like that of a drum, but at that moment another flash of lightning illumined the sky, followed almost immediately by a thunder-clap that seemed to split the roof. Dumb-stricken, pale as death, she dropped upon a chair.
She walked in and glanced around, not really recognizing anything. The solitary candle flickered dimly in that attic, which was over fifteen feet high, filled with a chaotic assortment of items casting strange shadows on the walls painted in gray wash. No, she didn’t recognize anything. She automatically lifted her gaze to the large studio window, where the rain pounded with a deafening thrum like a drum, but at that moment, another flash of lightning lit up the sky, quickly followed by a thunderclap that felt like it could shatter the roof. Stunned, pale as a ghost, she collapsed into a chair.
‘The devil!’ muttered Claude, who also was rather pale. ‘That clap wasn’t far off. We were just in time. It’s better here than in the streets, isn’t it?’
‘The devil!’ muttered Claude, who was also a bit pale. ‘That clap was really close. We got here just in time. It’s better here than out on the streets, right?’
Then he went towards the door, closed it with a bang and turned the key, while she watched him with a dazed look.
Then he walked over to the door, slammed it shut, and locked it, while she looked at him with a confused expression.
‘There, now, we are at home.’
"Alright, we’re home now."
But it was all over. There were only a few more thunder-claps in the distance, and the rain soon ceased altogether. Claude, who was now growing embarrassed, had examined the girl, askance. She seemed by no means bad looking, and assuredly she was young: twenty at the most. This scrutiny had the effect of making him more suspicious of her still, in spite of an unconscious feeling, a vague idea, that she was not altogether deceiving him. In any case, no matter how clever she might be, she was mistaken if she imagined she had caught him. To prove this he wilfully exaggerated his gruffness and curtness of manner.
But it was all over. There were only a few more thunderclaps in the distance, and the rain soon stopped completely. Claude, now feeling a bit awkward, glanced at the girl. She didn’t look bad at all, and she was definitely young—twenty at most. Examining her made him even more suspicious of her, even though he had an unconscious feeling, a vague idea, that she wasn’t completely deceiving him. In any case, no matter how clever she might be, she was wrong if she thought she had him figured out. To show this, he intentionally played up his gruffness and shortness in his manner.
Her very anguish at his words and demeanour made her rise, and in her turn she examined him, though without daring to look him straight in the face. And the aspect of that bony young man, with his angular joints and wild bearded face, increased her fears. With his black felt hat and his old brown coat, discoloured by long usage, he looked like a kind of brigand.
Her pain at his words and behavior made her stand up, and she scrutinized him, though she didn’t dare to look him directly in the eye. The sight of that bony young man, with his sharp features and wild, bearded face, heightened her fears. Wearing his black felt hat and worn-out brown coat, faded from years of use, he resembled a sort of bandit.
Directly he told her to make herself at home and go to bed, for he placed his bed at her disposal, she shrinkingly replied: ‘Thank you; I’ll do very well as I am; I’ll not undress.’
Directly, he told her to make herself comfortable and go to bed since he offered her his bed. She shyly replied, "Thanks; I’m fine as I am; I won’t change."
‘But your clothes are dripping,’ he retorted. ‘Come now, don’t make an idiot of yourself.’
‘But your clothes are soaked,’ he shot back. ‘Come on, don’t embarrass yourself.’
And thereupon he began to knock about the chairs, and flung aside an old screen, behind which she noticed a washstand and a tiny iron bedstead, from which he began to remove the coverlet.
And then he started to mess with the chairs and tossed aside an old screen. Behind it, she spotted a washstand and a small iron bed, from which he began to take off the coverlet.
‘No, no, monsieur, it isn’t worth while; I assure you that I shall stay here.’
‘No, no, sir, it’s not worth it; I promise you that I'm going to stay here.’
At this, however, Claude became angry, gesticulating and shaking his fists.
At this, Claude got angry, waving his arms and shaking his fists.
‘How much more of this comedy are we to have?’ said he. ‘As I give you my bed, what have you to complain of? You need not pay any attention to me. I shall sleep on that couch.’
‘How much longer are we going to deal with this ridiculousness?’ he said. ‘Since I'm giving you my bed, what do you have to complain about? You don't need to worry about me. I'll sleep on that couch.’
He strode towards her with a threatening look, and thereupon, beside herself with fear, thinking that he was going to strike her, she tremblingly unfastened her hat. The water was dripping from her skirts. He kept on growling. Nevertheless, a sudden scruple seemed to come to him, for he ended by saying, condescendingly:
He walked up to her with a menacing look, and in her panic, thinking he was about to hit her, she nervously took off her hat. Water was dripping from her dress. He continued to grumble. However, a sudden doubt seemed to hit him, and he finally said, in a patronizing way:
‘Perhaps you don’t like to sleep in my sheets. I’ll change them.’
‘Maybe you don’t like sleeping in my sheets. I’ll change them.’
He at once began dragging them from the bed and flinging them on to the couch at the other end of the studio. And afterwards he took a clean pair from the wardrobe and began to make the bed with all the deftness of a bachelor accustomed to that kind of thing. He carefully tucked in the clothes on the side near the wall, shook the pillows, and turned back a corner of the coverlet.
He immediately started pulling them off the bed and throwing them onto the couch at the other end of the studio. Then he grabbed a fresh set from the wardrobe and began making the bed with the skill of a bachelor who was used to doing this. He neatly tucked in the sheets on the wall side, fluffed the pillows, and folded back a corner of the coverlet.
‘There, that’ll do; won’t it?’ said he.
"That’s good, right?" he said.
And as she did not answer, but remained motionless, he pushed her behind the screen. ‘Good heavens! what a lot of fuss,’ he thought. And after spreading his own sheets on the couch, and hanging his clothes on an easel, he quickly went to bed himself. When he was on the point of blowing out the candle, however, he reflected that if he did so she would have to undress in the dark, and so he waited. At first he had not heard her stir; she had no doubt remained standing against the iron bedstead. But at last he detected a slight rustling, a slow, faint movement, as if amidst her preparations she also were listening, frightened perchance by the candle which was still alight. At last, after several minutes, the spring mattress creaked, and then all became still.
And when she didn’t reply and just stood there frozen, he guided her behind the screen. ‘Good grief! What a lot of drama,’ he thought. After spreading his own sheets on the couch and hanging his clothes on an easel, he quickly got into bed. Just as he was about to blow out the candle, he realized that if he did, she’d have to change in the dark, so he hesitated. At first, he didn’t hear her move; she probably stayed pressed against the iron bed frame. But eventually, he noticed a slight rustling, a slow, delicate movement, as if she was also listening, perhaps scared by the candle that was still burning. Finally, after several minutes, the spring mattress creaked, and then everything fell silent.
‘Are you comfortable, mademoiselle?’ now asked Claude, in a much more gentle voice.
“Are you comfortable, miss?” Claude asked now, in a much softer voice.
‘Yes, monsieur, very comfortable,’ she replied, in a scarcely audible voice, which still quivered with emotion.
‘Yes, sir, very comfortable,’ she replied, in a barely audible voice that still trembled with emotion.
‘Very well, then. Good-night.’
“Alright, then. Goodnight.”
‘Good-night.’
‘Good night.’
He blew out the candle, and the silence became more intense. In spite of his fatigue, his eyes soon opened again, and gazed upward at the large window of the studio. The sky had become very clear again, the stars were twinkling in the sultry July night, and, despite the storm, the heat remained oppressive. Claude was thinking about the girl—agitated for a moment by contrary feelings, though at last contempt gained the mastery. He indeed believed himself to be very strong-minded; he imagined a romance concocted to destroy his tranquillity, and he gibed contentedly at having frustrated it. His experience of women was very slight, nevertheless he endeavoured to draw certain conclusions from the story she had told him, struck as he was at present by certain petty details, and feeling perplexed. But why, after all, should he worry his brain? What did it matter whether she had told him the truth or a lie? In the morning she would go off; there would be an end to it all, and they would never see each other again. Thus Claude lay cogitating, and it was only towards daybreak, when the stars began to pale, that he fell asleep. As for the girl behind the screen, in spite of the crushing fatigue of her journey, she continued tossing about uneasily, oppressed by the heaviness of the atmosphere beneath the hot zinc-work of the roof; and doubtless, too, she was rendered nervous by the strangeness of her surroundings.
He blew out the candle, and the silence grew even heavier. Despite his tiredness, his eyes soon opened again and looked up at the large window of the studio. The sky was very clear again, the stars were twinkling in the sultry July night, and even with the storm, the heat was still overwhelming. Claude was thinking about the girl—briefly disturbed by conflicting emotions, but in the end, contempt won out. He really believed he was very strong-minded; he pictured a romance designed to disrupt his peace, and he smugly thought about how he had thwarted it. His experience with women was quite limited, yet he tried to draw some conclusions from the story she had told him, struck at the moment by certain minor details and feeling confused. But why should he even worry about it? What did it matter whether she had told him the truth or a lie? In the morning, she would leave; that would be the end of everything, and they would never see each other again. So, Claude lay there thinking, and it was only towards daybreak, when the stars began to fade, that he finally fell asleep. As for the girl behind the screen, despite being utterly exhausted from her journey, she kept tossing and turning restlessly, weighed down by the heavy air beneath the hot metal roof; and surely, she was also on edge due to the unfamiliarity of her surroundings.
In the morning, when Claude awoke, his eyes kept blinking. It was very late, and the sunshine streamed through the large window. One of his theories was, that young landscape painters should take studios despised by the academical figure painters—studios which the sun flooded with living beams. Nevertheless he felt dazzled, and fell back again on his couch. Why the devil had he been sleeping there? His eyes, still heavy with sleep, wandered mechanically round the studio, when, all at once, beside the screen he noticed a heap of petticoats. Then he at once remembered the girl. He began to listen, and heard a sound of long-drawn, regular breathing, like that of a child comfortably asleep. Ah! so she was still slumbering, and so calmly, that it would be a pity to disturb her. He felt dazed and somewhat annoyed at the adventure, however, for it would spoil his morning’s work. He got angry at his own good nature; it would be better to shake her, so that she might go at once. Nevertheless he put on his trousers and slippers softly, and walked about on tiptoes.
In the morning, when Claude woke up, his eyes kept blinking. It was really late, and sunlight poured through the big window. One of his ideas was that young landscape artists should choose studios that were looked down upon by the traditional figure painters—studios that the sun flooded with bright rays. Still, he felt dazzled and fell back onto his couch. Why on earth had he been sleeping there? His eyes, still heavy with sleep, scanned the studio mechanically when suddenly he noticed a pile of petticoats next to the screen. Then he remembered the girl. He listened and heard a sound of slow, steady breathing, like that of a child sleeping peacefully. Ah! So she was still asleep, and so peacefully that it would be a shame to wake her. He felt dazed and a bit annoyed by the whole situation, though, because it was going to ruin his morning work. He got frustrated with his own kindness; it would be better to shake her awake so she could leave right away. Still, he quietly put on his pants and slippers and tiptoed around the studio.
The cuckoo clock struck nine, and Claude made a gesture of annoyance. Nothing had stirred; the regular breathing continued. The best thing to do, he thought, would be to set to work on his large picture; he would see to his breakfast later on, when he was able to move about. But, after all, he could not make up his mind. He who lived amid chronic disorder felt worried by that heap of petticoats lying on the floor. Some water had dripped from them, but they were damp still. And so, while grumbling in a low tone, he ended by picking them up one by one and spreading them over the chairs in the sunlight. Had one ever seen the like, clothes thrown about anyhow? They would never get dry, and she would never go off! He turned all that feminine apparel over very awkwardly, got entangled with the black dress-body, and went on all fours to pick up the stockings that had fallen behind an old canvas. They were Balbriggan stockings of a dark grey, long and fine, and he examined them, before hanging them up to dry. The water oozing from the edge of the dress had soaked them, so he wrung and stretched them with his warm hands, in order that he might be able to send her away the quicker.
The cuckoo clock struck nine, and Claude sighed in frustration. Nothing had changed; the steady breathing continued. He figured the best thing to do would be to start working on his big painting; he could deal with breakfast later when he was able to move around. But still, he couldn’t make up his mind. Living in constant chaos, he felt distracted by the pile of skirts on the floor. Some water had dripped from them, but they were still damp. So, while muttering to himself, he eventually began to pick them up one by one and laid them over the chairs in the sunlight. Had anyone ever seen anything like it, clothes thrown around haphazardly? They’d never dry, and she wouldn’t leave! He awkwardly flipped through the feminine clothing, got tangled up in the black dress bodice, and went on all fours to grab the stockings that had fallen behind an old canvas. They were dark grey Balbriggan stockings, long and fine, and he inspected them before hanging them up to dry. The water dripping from the edge of the dress had soaked them, so he wrung them out and stretched them with his warm hands to get her out of there as quickly as possible.
Since he had been on his legs, Claude had felt sorely tempted to push aside the screen and to take a look at his guest. This self-condemned curiosity only increased his bad temper. At last, with his habitual shrug of the shoulders, he was taking up his brushes, when he heard some words stammered amidst a rustling of bed-clothes. Then, however, soft breathing was heard again, and this time he yielded to the temptation, dropping his brushes, and peeping from behind the screen. The sight that met his eyes rooted him to the spot, so fascinated that he muttered, ‘Good gracious! good gracious!’
Since he had been on his feet, Claude had been really tempted to push aside the screen and check out his guest. This self-inflicted curiosity only made him more irritable. Finally, with his usual shrug, he was about to pick up his brushes when he heard some words mumbled amid the rustling of bed sheets. Then, he heard soft breathing again, and this time he gave in to the temptation, dropping his brushes and peeking from behind the screen. The sight before him froze him in place, completely captivated, as he muttered, "Good gracious! good gracious!"
The girl, amidst the hot-house heat that came from the window, had thrown back her coverlet, and, overcome with the fatigue of a restless night, lay steeped in a flood of sunshine, unconscious of everything. In her feverish slumbers a shoulder button had become unfastened, and a sleeve slipping down allowed her bosom to be seen, with skin which looked almost gilded and soft like satin. Her right arm rested beneath her neck, her head was thrown back, and her black unwound tresses enwrapped her like a dusky cloak.
The girl, surrounded by the heat coming in from the window, had thrown back her blanket and, exhausted from a restless night, lay soaked in sunlight, unaware of anything around her. In her feverish sleep, a shoulder button had come undone, and a sleeve slipping down revealed her chest, with skin that looked almost golden and soft like satin. Her right arm rested under her neck, her head was tilted back, and her long black hair flowed around her like a dark cloak.
‘Good gracious! But she’s a beauty!’ muttered Claude once more.
‘Wow! She’s gorgeous!’ muttered Claude again.
There, in every point, was the figure he had vainly sought for his picture, and it was almost in the right pose. She was rather spare, perhaps, but then so lithe and fresh.
There, in every detail, was the figure he had unsuccessfully tried to find for his painting, and she was almost in the right pose. She was a bit slender, perhaps, but still so graceful and vibrant.
With a light step, Claude ran to take his box of crayons, and a large sheet of paper. Then, squatting on a low chair, he placed a portfolio on his knees and began to sketch with an air of perfect happiness. All else vanished amidst artistic surprise and enthusiasm. No thought of sex came to him. It was all a mere question of chaste outlines, splendid flesh tints, well-set muscles. Face to face with nature, an uneasy mistrust of his powers made him feel small; so, squaring his elbows, he became very attentive and respectful. This lasted for about a quarter of an hour, during which he paused every now and then, blinking at the figure before him. As he was afraid, however, that she might change her position, he speedily set to work again, holding his breath, lest he should awaken her.
With a light step, Claude ran to grab his box of crayons and a large sheet of paper. Then, sitting on a low chair, he placed a portfolio on his knees and started to sketch with pure happiness. Everything else faded away in a burst of artistic excitement. He didn’t think about sex at all. It was just about clean outlines, beautiful flesh tones, and well-defined muscles. Facing nature, a slight doubt about his abilities made him feel small; so, bracing his elbows, he became very focused and respectful. This lasted for about fifteen minutes, during which he paused occasionally, blinking at the figure in front of him. However, worried that she might change her position, he quickly went back to work, holding his breath so he wouldn’t disturb her.
And yet, while steadily applying himself to his work, vague fancies again assailed his mind. Who could she be? Assuredly no mere hussy. But why had she told him such an unbelievable tale? Thereupon he began to imagine other stories. Perhaps she had but lately arrived in Paris with a lover, who had abandoned her; perhaps she was some young woman of the middle classes led into bad company by a female friend, and not daring to go home to her relatives; or else there was some still more intricate drama beneath it all; something horrible, inexplicable, the truth of which he would never fathom. All these hypotheses increased his perplexity. Meanwhile, he went on sketching her face, studying it with care. The whole of the upper part, the clear forehead, as smooth as a polished mirror, the small nose, with its delicately chiselled and nervous nostrils, denoted great kindliness and gentleness. One divined the sweet smile of the eyes beneath the closed lids; a smile that would light up the whole of the features. Unfortunately, the lower part of the face marred that expression of sweetness; the jaw was prominent, and the lips, rather too full, showed almost blood-like over the strong white teeth. There was here, like a flash of passion, something that spoke of awakening womanhood, still unconscious of itself amidst those other traits of childlike softness.
And yet, while he focused intently on his work, vague thoughts drifted into his mind again. Who could she be? She was definitely not just some superficial girl. But why had she shared such an unbelievable story with him? That led him to come up with other scenarios. Maybe she had just arrived in Paris with a boyfriend who had left her; maybe she was a young woman from a middle-class background who had fallen in with a bad crowd, too afraid to return to her family; or perhaps there was an even more complicated situation hidden behind it all—something terrible and inexplicable that he would never truly understand. All these possibilities only added to his confusion. Meanwhile, he continued sketching her face, studying it carefully. The upper part—her clear forehead, smooth like a polished mirror, her small nose with delicately shaped and expressive nostrils—revealed great kindness and gentleness. You could sense the sweet smile in her closed eyes, a smile that would light up her entire face. Unfortunately, the lower part of her face spoiled that expression of sweetness; her jaw was strong, and her lips, a bit too full, appeared almost blood-red against her strong white teeth. There was, in that flash of passion, something that hinted at awakening womanhood, still unaware of itself amidst the childlike softness of her other features.
But suddenly a shiver rippled over the girl’s satiny skin. Perhaps she had felt the weight of that gaze thus mentally dissecting her. She opened her eyes very wide and uttered a cry.
But suddenly a shiver ran over the girl’s smooth skin. Maybe she had sensed the intensity of that gaze analyzing her. She opened her eyes wide and let out a scream.
‘Ah! great heavens!’
‘Oh my gosh!’
Sudden terror paralysed her at the sight of that strange room, and that young man crouching in his shirt-sleeves in front of her and devouring her with his eyes. Flushing hotly, she impulsively pulled up the counterpane.
Sudden fear froze her at the sight of that strange room, and the young man crouching in his shirt sleeves in front of her, staring at her intensely. Blushing deeply, she instinctively pulled up the blanket.
‘Well, what’s the matter?’ cried Claude, angrily, his crayon suspended in mid-air; ‘what wasp has stung you now?’
‘Well, what’s wrong?’ shouted Claude, angrily, his crayon hanging in mid-air; ‘what’s got you all worked up now?’
He, whose knowledge of womankind was largely limited to professional models, was at a loss to understand the girl’s action.
He, whose knowledge of women was mostly limited to professional models, was confused by the girl’s behavior.
She neither spoke nor stirred, but remained with the counterpane tightly wrapped round her throat, her body almost doubled up, and scarcely showing an outline beneath her coverings.
She didn’t say a word or move, just stayed there with the blanket wrapped tightly around her neck, her body almost curled up, barely visible under the layers.
‘I won’t eat you, will I?’ urged Claude. ‘Come, just lie as you were, there’s a good girl.’
‘I won’t eat you, will I?’ Claude urged. ‘Come on, just lie there as you were, that’s a good girl.’
Again she blushed to her very ears. At last she stammered, ‘Oh, no, monsieur, no—pray!’
Again she blushed all the way to her ears. Finally, she stammered, “Oh, no, sir, no—please!”
But he began to lose his temper altogether. One of the angry fits to which he was subject was coming upon him. He thought her obstinacy stupid. And as in response to his urgent requests she only began to sob, he quite lost his head in despair before his sketch, thinking that he would never be able to finish it, and would thus lose a capital study for his picture.
But he started to completely lose his temper. One of his angry outbursts was about to hit him. He thought her stubbornness was ridiculous. And when she just started crying in response to his desperate pleas, he completely lost control in despair over his sketch, thinking that he would never be able to finish it and would end up losing a valuable study for his painting.
‘Well, you won’t, eh? But it’s idiotic. What do you take me for? Have I annoyed you at all? You know I haven’t. Besides, listen, it is very unkind of you to refuse me this service, because, after all, I sheltered you—I gave up my bed to you.’
‘Well, you won’t, huh? But that’s ridiculous. What do you think I am? Have I bothered you at all? You know I haven’t. Besides, think about it, it’s really unkind of you to deny me this favor, because, after all, I took you in—I gave up my bed for you.’
She only continued to cry, with her head buried in the pillow.
She just kept crying, with her head buried in the pillow.
‘I assure you that I am very much in want of this sketch, else I wouldn’t worry you.’
‘I assure you that I really need this sketch; otherwise, I wouldn’t bother you.’
He grew surprised at the girl’s abundant tears, and ashamed at having been so rough with her, so he held his tongue at last, feeling embarrassed, and wishing too that she might have time to recover a bit. Then he began again, in a very gentle tone:
He was surprised by the girl's tears and felt ashamed for being so harsh with her, so he finally held back his words, feeling awkward and hoping she would have some time to calm down. Then he started again, speaking in a very soft tone:
‘Well, as it annoys you, let’s say no more about it. But if you only knew. I’ve got a figure in my picture yonder which doesn’t make head-way at all, and you were just in the very note. As for me, when it’s a question of painting, I’d kill father and mother, you know. Well, you’ll excuse me, won’t you? And if you’d like me to be very nice, you’d just give me a few minutes more. No, no; keep quiet as you are; I only want the head—nothing but the head. If I could finish that, it would be all right. Really now, be kind; put your arm as it was before, and I shall be very grateful to you—grateful all my life long.’
'Well, since it bothers you, let’s drop it. But if you only knew. I have a figure in my painting over there that isn’t making any progress, and you were just in the perfect pose. As for me, when it comes to painting, I’d do anything, you know. Well, you’ll forgive me, won’t you? And if you want me to be really nice, just give me a few more minutes. No, no; stay still as you are; I just need the head—nothing but the head. If I could finish that, it would be great. Really now, please be kind; put your arm back how it was before, and I’ll be very grateful to you—grateful for life.'
It was he who was entreating now, pitifully waving his crayon amid the emotion of his artistic craving. Besides, he had not stirred, but remained crouching on his low chair, at a distance from the bed. At last she risked the ordeal, and uncovered her tranquillised face. What else could she do? She was at his mercy, and he looked so wretchedly unhappy.
It was he who was pleading now, desperately waving his crayon out of his artistic desire. Plus, he hadn’t moved, but stayed crouched on his low chair, away from the bed. Finally, she took the chance and revealed her calm face. What else could she do? She was at his mercy, and he looked so hopelessly unhappy.
Nevertheless, she still hesitated, she felt some last scruples. But eventually, without saying a word, she slowly brought her bare arm from beneath the coverings, and again slipped it under her head, taking care, however, to keep the counterpane tightly round her throat.
Nevertheless, she still hesitated, feeling some last doubts. But eventually, without saying a word, she slowly moved her bare arm out from under the covers and slipped it back under her head, making sure to keep the blanket wrapped tightly around her throat.
‘Ah! how kind you are! I’ll make haste, you will be free in a minute.’
‘Ah! how nice you are! I’ll hurry, you’ll be free in a minute.’
He bent over his drawing, and only looked at her now and then with the glance of a painter who simply regards the woman before him as a model. At first she became pink again; the consciousness that she was showing her bare arm—which she would have shown in a ball-room without thinking at all about it—filled her with confusion. Nevertheless, the young man seemed so reasonable that she became reassured. The blush left her cheeks, and her lips parted in a vague confiding smile. And from between her half-opened eyelids she began to study him. How he had frightened her the previous night with his thick brown beard, his large head, and his impulsive gestures. And yet he was not ugly; she even detected great tenderness in the depths of his brown eyes, while his nose altogether surprised her. It was a finely-cut woman’s nose, almost lost amidst the bristling hair on his lips. He shook slightly with a nervous anxiety which made his crayon seem a living thing in his slender hand, and which touched her though she knew not why. She felt sure he was not bad-natured, his rough, surly ways arose from bashfulness. She did not decipher all this very clearly, but she divined it, and began to put herself at her ease, as if she were with a friend.
He leaned over his drawing and looked at her only occasionally, like a painter who sees the woman in front of him just as a model. At first, she felt herself blush again; realizing she was showing her bare arm—which she would have done in a ballroom without a second thought—made her feel self-conscious. Still, the young man seemed so calm that she started to relax. The color faded from her cheeks, and a shy, trusting smile spread across her lips. Through her half-closed eyelids, she began to observe him. Remembering how scared she was of him the night before, with his thick brown beard, big head, and impulsive gestures. Yet, he wasn’t unattractive; she even noticed a deep tenderness in his brown eyes, and his nose surprised her. It was a delicate, almost feminine nose, nearly hidden by the coarse hair on his lips. He trembled slightly with a nervous energy that made his crayon feel alive in his slender hand, and this touched her in a way she couldn't explain. She felt certain he wasn't mean; his rough, gruff manner came from shyness. She didn’t fully understand this, but she sensed it, and began to feel at ease, as if she were with a friend.
Nevertheless, the studio continued to frighten her a little. She cast sidelong glances around it, astonished at so much disorder and carelessness. Before the stove the cinders of the previous winter still lay in a heap. Besides the bed, the small washstand, and the couch, there was no other furniture than an old dilapidated oaken wardrobe and a large deal table, littered with brushes, colours, dirty plates, and a spirit lamp, atop of which was a saucepan, with shreds of vermicelli sticking to its sides. Some rush-bottomed chairs, their seats the worse for wear, were scattered about beside spavined easels. Near the couch the candlestick used on the previous night stood on the floor, which looked as if it had not been swept for fully a month. There was only the cuckoo clock, a huge one, with a dial illuminated with crimson flowers, that looked clean and bright, ticking sonorously all the while. But what especially frightened her were some sketches in oils that hung frameless from the walls, a serried array of sketches reaching to the floor, where they mingled with heaps of canvases thrown about anyhow. She had never seen such terrible painting, so coarse, so glaring, showing a violence of colour, that jarred upon her nerves like a carter’s oath heard on the doorstep of an inn. She cast her eyes down for a moment, and then became attracted by a picture, the back of which was turned to her. It was the large canvas at which the painter was working, and which he pushed against the wall every night, the better to judge it on the morrow in the surprise of the first glance. What could it be, that one, she wondered, since he dared not even show it? And, meantime, through the vast room, a sheet of burning sunlight, falling straight from the window panes, unchecked by any blind, spread with the flow of molten gold over all the broken-down furniture, whose devil-may-care shabbiness it threw into bold relief.
Nevertheless, the studio continued to intimidate her a little. She glanced around, shocked by the chaos and neglect. The ashes from last winter still piled up by the stove. Other than the bed, a small washstand, and a couch, the only furniture was an old, worn oak wardrobe and a large table covered in brushes, paint, dirty plates, and a spirit lamp with a saucepan on top, its sides smeared with bits of vermicelli. Some worn-out rush-bottomed chairs were scattered nearby next to rickety easels. By the couch, a candlestick from the previous night sat on the floor, which looked like it hadn't been cleaned in at least a month. The only thing that looked clean and bright was a huge cuckoo clock with a dial decorated with red flowers, ticking loudly the whole time. But what really scared her were the frameless oil sketches hanging on the walls, arranged in a disorganized fashion that reached the floor, where they mixed with piles of canvases thrown haphazardly. She had never seen such awful paintings—so rough, so bright, the violent colors grating on her senses like a cab driver's curse heard at the entrance of a pub. She looked down for a moment and then was drawn to a picture, its back facing her. It was the large canvas the painter had been working on, which he pushed against the wall every night to better judge it with fresh eyes in the morning. What could it be, she wondered, that he was too afraid to show? Meanwhile, across the vast room, a stream of bright sunlight poured in through the window, unhindered by any blinds, casting a flow of molten gold over all the shabby furniture, highlighting its carefree dilapidation.
Claude began to feel the silence oppressive; he wanted to say something, no matter what, first, in order to be polite, and more especially to divert her attention from her pose. But cudgel his brain as he would, he could only think of asking: ‘Pray, what is your name?’
Claude started to feel the silence was heavy; he wanted to say something, anything, at first to be polite, and especially to distract her from her pose. But no matter how hard he tried, the only thing he could think of was asking, “What’s your name?”
She opened her eyes, which she had closed, as if she were feeling sleepy.
She opened her eyes, which she had shut, as if she were feeling drowsy.
‘Christine,’ she said.
'Christine,' she said.
At which he seemed surprised. Neither had he told her his name. Since the night before they had been together, side by side, without knowing one another.
At this, he looked surprised. He also hadn’t told her his name. Since the night before, they had been together, side by side, without really knowing each other.
‘My name is Claude.’
"My name's Claude."
And, having looked at her just at that moment, he saw her burst into a pretty laugh. It was the sudden, merry peal of a big girl, still scarcely more than a hoyden. She considered this tardy exchange of names rather droll. Then something else amused her.
And, having glanced at her just then, he saw her break into a lovely laugh. It was the sudden, joyful sound of a big girl, still hardly more than a tomboy. She found this late exchange of names quite funny. Then something else made her laugh.
‘How funny—Claude, Christine—they begin with the same letter.’
‘How funny—Claude, Christine—they both start with the same letter.’
They both became silent once more. He was blinking at his work, growing absorbed in it, and at a loss how to continue the conversation. He fancied that she was beginning to feel tired and uncomfortable, and in his fear lest she should stir, he remarked at random, merely to occupy her thoughts, ‘It feels rather warm.’
They both fell silent again. He was fixated on his work, getting lost in it, unsure how to keep the conversation going. He thought she might be getting tired and restless, and worried that if she moved, he said randomly, just to keep her mind occupied, ‘It feels pretty warm.’
This time she checked her laughter, her natural gaiety that revived and burst forth in spite of herself ever since she had felt easier in mind. Truth to tell, the heat was indeed so oppressive that it seemed to her as if she were in a bath, with skin moist and pale with the milky pallor of a camellia.
This time she held back her laughter, her natural cheerfulness that had reemerged and spilled out despite her best efforts ever since she had felt more at ease. To be honest, the heat was so stifling that it felt as if she were in a bath, her skin damp and pale with the milky whiteness of a camellia.
‘Yes, it feels rather warm,’ she said, seriously, though mirth was dancing in her eyes.
‘Yes, it feels pretty warm,’ she said, earnestly, though amusement was glimmering in her eyes.
Thereupon Claude continued, with a good-natured air:
Thereupon Claude continued, in a friendly manner:
‘It’s the sun falling straight in; but, after all, a flood of sunshine on one’s skin does one good. We could have done with some of it last night at the door, couldn’t we?’
‘It’s the sun shining directly in; but really, a burst of sunlight on your skin is good for you. We could have used some of that last night at the door, right?’
At this both burst out laughing, and he, delighted at having hit upon a subject of conversation, questioned her about her adventure, without, however, feeling inquisitive, for he cared little about discovering the real truth, and was only intent upon prolonging the sitting.
At this, they both laughed, and he, pleased to have found something to talk about, asked her about her adventure. However, he wasn't really curious to know the real truth; he simply wanted to keep the conversation going.
Christine simply, and in a few words, related what had befallen her. Early on the previous morning she had left Clermont for Paris, where she was to take up a situation as reader and companion to the widow of a general, Madame Vanzade, a rich old lady, who lived at Passy. The train was timed to reach Paris at ten minutes past nine in the evening, and a maid was to meet her at the station. They had even settled by letter upon a means of recognition. She was to wear a black hat with a grey feather in it. But, a little above Nevers, her train had come upon a goods train which had run off the rails, its litter of smashed trucks still obstructing the line. There was quite a series of mishaps and delays. First an interminable wait in the carriages, which the passengers had to quit at last, luggage and all, in order to trudge to the next station, three kilometres distant, where the authorities had decided to make up another train. By this time they had lost two hours, and then another two were lost in the general confusion which the accident had caused from one end of the line to the other, in such wise that they reached the Paris terminus four hours behind time, that is, at one o’clock in the morning.
Christine briefly shared what had happened to her. Early the previous morning, she had left Clermont for Paris, where she was set to start a job as a reader and companion to the widow of a general, Madame Vanzade, a wealthy old lady living in Passy. The train was scheduled to arrive in Paris at ten minutes past nine in the evening, and a maid was supposed to meet her at the station. They had even agreed through letters on how to identify each other. She was to wear a black hat with a grey feather in it. However, a little north of Nevers, her train encountered a freight train that had derailed, with its wreckage still blocking the tracks. There were several setbacks and delays. First, they faced a long wait in their carriages, which the passengers eventually had to leave behind, along with their luggage, to walk to the next station three kilometers away, where the authorities decided to arrange another train. By this point, they had already lost two hours, and then another two hours were lost due to the chaos the accident had caused all along the line, resulting in their arrival at the Paris terminus four hours late, at one o’clock in the morning.
‘Bad luck, indeed,’ interrupted Claude, who was still sceptical, though half disarmed, in his surprise at the neat way in which the girl arranged the details of her story.
'Bad luck, for sure,' interrupted Claude, who was still doubtful, though somewhat taken aback by the way the girl neatly arranged the details of her story.
‘And, of course, there was no one at the station to meet you?’ he added.
‘And, of course, there was no one at the station to meet you?’ he added.
Christine had, indeed, missed Madame Vanzade’s maid, who, no doubt, had grown tired of waiting. She told Claude of her utter helplessness at the Lyons terminus—that large, strange, dark station, deserted at that late hour of night. She had not dared to take a cab at first, but had kept on walking up and down, carrying her small bag, and still hoping that somebody would come for her. When at last she made up her mind there only remained one driver, very dirty and smelling of drink, who prowled round her, offering his cab in a knowing, impudent way.
Christine had really missed Madame Vanzade’s maid, who must have gotten tired of waiting. She told Claude about how helpless she felt at the Lyon train station—that big, strange, dark place that was deserted at that late hour. At first, she hadn’t dared to take a cab and just walked back and forth, carrying her small bag, still hoping someone would show up for her. When she finally decided to take a cab, there was only one driver left, very dirty and smelling of alcohol, who circled around her, offering his cab in a smug and brazen way.
‘Yes, I know, a dawdler,’ said Claude, getting as interested as if he were listening to a fairy tale. ‘So you got into his cab?’
‘Yeah, I know, a slacker,’ Claude said, getting as interested as if he were listening to a fairy tale. ‘So you got into his cab?’
Looking up at the ceiling, Christine continued, without shifting her position: ‘He made me; he called me his little dear, and frightened me. When he found out that I was going to Passy, he became very angry, and whipped his horse so hard that I was obliged to hold on by the doors. After that I felt more easy, because the cab trundled along all right through the lighted streets, and I saw people about. At last I recognised the Seine, for though I was never in Paris before, I had often looked at a map. Naturally I thought he would keep along the quay, so I became very frightened again on noticing that we crossed a bridge. Just then it began to rain, and the cab, which had got into a very dark turning, suddenly stopped. The driver got down from his seat, and declared it was raining too hard for him to remain on the box—’
Looking up at the ceiling, Christine continued, without changing her posture: ‘He made me; he called me his little darling and scared me. When he found out I was going to Passy, he got really angry and whipped his horse so hard that I had to hold on to the doors. After that, I felt a bit better because the cab rolled along fine through the lighted streets, and I saw people around. Eventually, I recognized the Seine, since I had never been to Paris before but had often looked at a map. Naturally, I thought he would stay along the quay, so I got scared again when I noticed we crossed a bridge. Just then, it started to rain, and the cab, which had turned into a very dark street, suddenly stopped. The driver got off his seat and said it was raining too hard for him to stay on the box—’
Claude burst out laughing. He no longer doubted. She could not have invented that driver. And as she suddenly stopped, somewhat confused, he said, ‘All right, the cabman was having a joke.’
Claude laughed out loud. He had no doubts left. She couldn't have made up that cab driver. And as she suddenly paused, a bit flustered, he said, ‘Okay, the cab driver was just messing around.’
‘I jumped out at once by the other door,’ resumed Christine. ‘Then he began to swear at me, saying that we had arrived at Passy, and that he would tear my hat from my head if I did not pay him. It was raining in torrents, and the quay was absolutely deserted. I was losing my head, and when I had pulled out a five-franc piece, he whipped up his horse and drove off, taking my little bag, which luckily only contained two pocket-handkerchiefs, a bit of cake, and the key of my trunk, which I had been obliged to leave behind in the train.’
“I jumped out right away through the other door,” Christine continued. “Then he started cursing at me, saying we had arrived at Passy and that he would rip my hat off if I didn’t pay him. It was pouring rain, and the quay was completely empty. I was panicking, and when I pulled out a five-franc coin, he whipped his horse and took off with my little bag, which luckily only had two handkerchiefs, a piece of cake, and the key to my trunk, which I had to leave behind on the train.”
‘But you ought to have taken his number,’ exclaimed the artist indignantly. In fact he now remembered having been brushed against by a passing cab, which had rattled by furiously while he was crossing the Pont Louis Philippe, amid the downpour of the storm. And he reflected how improbable truth often was. The story he had conjured up as being the most simple and logical was utterly stupid beside the natural chain of life’s many combinations.
‘But you should have taken his number,’ the artist exclaimed angrily. In fact, he now remembered being bumped by a passing cab that zoomed by furiously while he was crossing the Pont Louis Philippe in the pouring rain. He thought about how unbelievable reality often was. The story he had imagined as the simplest and most logical was completely ridiculous compared to the natural flow of life's countless combinations.
‘You may imagine how I felt under the doorway,’ concluded Christine. ‘I knew well enough that I was not at Passy, and that I should have to spend the night there, in this terrible Paris. And there was the thunder and the lightning—those horrible blue and red flashes, which showed me things that made me tremble.’
‘You can imagine how I felt standing in the doorway,’ Christine finished. ‘I knew I wasn’t at Passy, and that I would have to spend the night here, in this awful Paris. And there was the thunder and lightning—those terrible blue and red flashes, which revealed things that made me shiver.’
She closed her eyelids once more, she shivered, and the colour left her cheeks as, in her fancy, she again beheld the tragic city—that line of quays stretching away in a furnace-like blaze, the deep moat of the river, with its leaden waters obstructed by huge black masses, lighters looking like lifeless whales, and bristling with motionless cranes which stretched forth gallows-like arms. Was that a welcome to Paris?
She closed her eyes again, shivering as the color drained from her cheeks. In her imagination, she saw the tragic city once more—the line of quays stretching out in a furnace-like glare, the deep river moat with its heavy waters blocked by huge black shapes, lighters that looked like lifeless whales, and still cranes that extended their gallows-like arms. Was that a welcome to Paris?
Again did silence fall. Claude had resumed his drawing. But she became restless, her arm was getting stiff.
Again, silence fell. Claude had gone back to his drawing. But she started to feel restless; her arm was getting stiff.
‘Just put your elbow a little lower, please,’ said Claude. Then, with an air of concern, as if to excuse his curtness: ‘Your parents will be very uneasy, if they have heard of the accident.’
‘Just lower your elbow a bit, please,’ said Claude. Then, with a worried look, as if to justify his bluntness: ‘Your parents will be really worried if they’ve heard about the accident.’
‘I have no parents.’
"I don’t have parents."
‘What! neither father nor mother? You are all alone in the world?’
‘What! No father or mother? You’re all alone in the world?’
‘Yes; all alone.’
"Yeah, all by myself."
She was eighteen years old, and had been born in Strasburg, quite by chance, though, between two changes of garrison, for her father was a soldier, Captain Hallegrain. Just as she entered upon her twelfth year, the captain, a Gascon, hailing from Montauban, had died at Clermont, where he had settled when paralysis of the legs had obliged him to retire from active service. For nearly five years afterwards, her mother, a Parisian by birth, had remained in that dull provincial town, managing as well as she could with her scanty pension, but eking it out by fan-painting, in order that she might bring up her daughter as a lady. She had, however, now been dead for fifteen months, and had left her child penniless and unprotected, without a friend, save the Superior of the Sisters of the Visitation, who had kept her with them. Christine had come straight to Paris from the convent, the Superior having succeeded in procuring her a situation as reader and companion to her old friend, Madame Vanzade, who was almost blind.
She was eighteen years old and had been born in Strasbourg by chance, between two army postings, since her father was a soldier, Captain Hallegrain. Just as she turned twelve, the captain, a Gascon from Montauban, passed away in Clermont, where he had settled after paralysis forced him to retire from active duty. For nearly five years after that, her mother, originally from Paris, lived in that dull provincial town, managing as best as she could with her small pension and supplementing it by painting fans to raise her daughter like a lady. However, she had died fifteen months ago, leaving her child broke and unprotected, with no one to turn to except the Superior of the Sisters of the Visitation, who had taken her in. Christine had come straight to Paris from the convent, as the Superior managed to find her a job as a reader and companion to her old friend, Madame Vanzade, who was almost blind.
At these additional particulars, Claude sat absolutely speechless. That convent, that well-bred orphan, that adventure, all taking so romantic a turn, made him relapse into embarrassment again, into all his former awkwardness of gesture and speech. He had left off drawing, and sat looking, with downcast eyes, at his sketch.
At these extra details, Claude was completely at a loss for words. That convent, that well-mannered orphan, that thrilling adventure, all taking such a romantic turn, caused him to feel awkward once more, slipping back into all his previous clumsiness in both movement and speech. He had stopped drawing and was staring down at his sketch with a heavy heart.
‘Is Clermont pretty?’ he asked, at last.
‘Is Clermont nice?’ he asked, finally.
‘Not very; it’s a gloomy town. Besides, I don’t know; I scarcely ever went out.’
‘Not really; it’s a depressing town. Besides, I’m not sure; I hardly ever went out.’
She was resting on her elbow, and continued, as if talking to herself in a very low voice, still tremulous from the thought of her bereavement.
She was propped up on her elbow and continued, as if speaking to herself in a barely audible voice, still shaking from the thought of her loss.
‘Mamma, who wasn’t strong, killed herself with work. She spoilt me; nothing was too good for me. I had all sorts of masters, but I did not get on very well; first, because I fell ill, then because I paid no attention. I was always laughing and skipping about like a featherbrain. I didn’t care for music, piano playing gave me a cramp in my arms. The only thing I cared about at all was painting.’
‘Mom, who wasn’t strong, worked herself to death. She spoiled me; nothing was too good for me. I had all kinds of teachers, but I didn't fit in very well; first, because I got sick, and then because I didn’t pay attention. I was always laughing and playing around like a ditz. I didn’t care about music; playing the piano gave me cramps in my arms. The only thing I really cared about was painting.’
He raised his head and interrupted her. ‘You can paint?’
He looked up and cut her off. ‘You can paint?’
‘Oh, no; I know nothing, nothing at all. Mamma, who was very talented, made me do a little water-colour, and I sometimes helped her with the backgrounds of her fans. She painted some lovely ones.’
‘Oh, no; I don’t know anything, nothing at all. Mom, who was really talented, had me do a little watercolor, and I sometimes helped her with the backgrounds of her fans. She painted some beautiful ones.’
In spite of herself, she then glanced at the startling sketches with which the walls seemed ablaze, and her limpid eyes assumed an uneasy expression at the sight of that rough, brutal style of painting. From where she lay she obtained a topsy-turvy view of the study of herself which the painter had begun, and her consternation at the violent tones she noticed, the rough crayon strokes, with which the shadows were dashed off, prevented her from asking to look at it more closely. Besides, she was growing very uncomfortable in that bed, where she lay broiling; she fidgetted with the idea of going off and putting an end to all these things which, ever since the night before, had seemed to her so much of a dream.
Despite herself, she glanced at the striking sketches that lit up the walls, and a worried look crossed her clear eyes at the sight of that rough, brutal painting style. From where she lay, she got a sideways view of the portrait the painter had started of her, and her shock at the intense colors she noticed and the rough crayon strokes used for the shadows stopped her from wanting to examine it more closely. Plus, she was feeling really uncomfortable in that bed, where she felt like she was roasting; she was restless, thinking about getting up and ending all these things that, ever since last night, had seemed like a dream.
Claude, no doubt, became aware of her discomfort. A sudden feeling of shame brought with it one of compunction.
Claude definitely noticed her discomfort. A sudden wave of shame came along with a feeling of guilt.
He put his unfinished sketch aside, and hastily exclaimed: ‘Much obliged for your kindness, mademoiselle. Forgive me, I have really abused it. Yes, indeed, pray get up; it’s time for you to look for your friends.’
He set his unfinished sketch aside and quickly said, “Thank you so much for your kindness, miss. I’m really sorry for taking advantage of it. Yes, please get up; it’s time for you to find your friends.”
And without appearing to understand why she did not follow his advice, but hid more and more of her bare arm in proportion as he drew nearer, he still insisted upon advising her to rise. All at once, as the real state of things struck him, he swung his arms about like a madman, set the screen in position, and went to the far end of the studio, where he began noisily setting his crockery in order, so that she might jump out and dress herself, without fear of being overheard.
And without seeming to understand why she didn’t take his advice, but covering more and more of her bare arm as he got closer, he kept insisting that she stand up. Suddenly, as the reality of the situation hit him, he flailed his arms like a madman, positioned the screen, and went to the far end of the studio, where he started making a racket as he organized his dishes, so she could get up and get dressed without worrying about being overheard.
Amidst the din he had thus raised, he failed to hear her hesitating voice, ‘Monsieur, monsieur—’
Amid the noise he had created, he didn't hear her uncertain voice, ‘Monsieur, monsieur—’
At last he caught her words.
At last he understood what she was saying.
‘Monsieur, would you be so kind—I can’t find my stockings.’
‘Sir, would you be so kind—I can’t find my stockings.’
Claude hurried forward. What had he been thinking of? What was she to do behind that screen, without her stockings and petticoats, which he had spread out in the sunlight? The stockings were dry, he assured himself of that by gently rubbing them together, and he handed them to her over the partition; again noticing her arm, bare, plump and rosy like that of a child. Then he tossed the skirts on to the foot of the bed and pushed her boots forward, leaving nothing but her bonnet suspended from the easel. She had thanked him and that was all; he scarcely distinguished the rustling of her clothes and the discreet splashing of water. Still he continued to concern himself about her.
Claude rushed forward. What had he been thinking? What was she supposed to do behind that screen, without her stockings and petticoats, which he had laid out in the sunlight? The stockings were dry, he reassured himself as he gently rubbed them together, and he handed them to her over the partition, again noticing her arm, bare, plump, and rosy like a child's. Then he tossed the skirts onto the foot of the bed and pushed her boots forward, leaving only her bonnet hanging from the easel. She had thanked him, and that was it; he could barely hear the rustling of her clothes and the quiet splash of water. Still, he couldn't stop worrying about her.
‘You will find the soap in a saucer on the table. Open the drawer and take a clean towel. Do you want more water? I’ll give you the pitcher.’
‘You’ll find the soap in a dish on the table. Open the drawer and grab a clean towel. Do you want more water? I’ll get you the pitcher.’
Suddenly the idea that he was blundering again exasperated him.
Suddenly, the thought that he was messing up again frustrated him.
‘There, there, I am only worrying you. I will leave you to your own devices. Do as if you were at home.’
‘There, there, I’m just making you anxious. I’ll let you be. Act like you’re at home.’
And he continued to potter about among the crockery. He was debating with himself whether he should ask her to stay to breakfast. He ought not to let her go like that. On the other hand, if she did stay, he would never get done; it would mean a loss of his whole morning. Without deciding anything, as soon as he had lighted his spirit lamp, he washed his saucepan and began to make some chocolate. He thought it more distingué, feeling rather ashamed of his vermicelli, which he mixed with bread and soused with oil as people do in the South of France. However, he was still breaking the chocolate into bits, when he uttered a cry of surprise, ‘What, already?’
And he kept moving around the dishes. He was thinking about whether he should invite her to stay for breakfast. He really shouldn't let her leave like that. But then again, if she stayed, he would never get anything done; it would mean losing his entire morning. Without coming to a decision, as soon as he lit his spirit lamp, he washed his saucepan and started making some chocolate. He thought it was more sophisticated, feeling kind of embarrassed about his vermicelli, which he mixed with bread and soaked in oil like people do in the South of France. However, he was still breaking the chocolate into pieces when he exclaimed in surprise, "What, already?"
It was Christine, who had pushed back the screen, and who appeared looking neat and correct in her black dress, duly laced and buttoned up, equipped, as it were, in a twinkle. Her rosy face did not even show traces of the water, her thick hair was twisted in a knot at the back of her head, not a single lock out of place. And Claude remained open-mouthed before that miracle of quickness, that proof of feminine skill in dressing well and promptly.
It was Christine who had pushed back the screen and appeared looking neat and put-together in her black dress, laced and buttoned up perfectly, ready in a flash. Her rosy face showed no signs of having been wet, and her thick hair was twisted into a knot at the back of her head, with not a single strand out of place. Claude stood there, speechless in awe of that amazing speed, a testament to a woman's ability to dress well and quickly.
‘The deuce, if you go about everything in that way!’ said he.
"The heck, if you handle everything like that!" he said.
He found her taller and handsomer than he had fancied. But what struck him most was her look of quiet decision. She was evidently no longer afraid of him. It seemed as though she had re-donned her armour and become an amazon again. She smiled and looked him straight in the face. Whereupon he said what he was still reluctant to say:
He found her taller and more attractive than he had imagined. But what impressed him the most was her calm determination. She clearly was no longer afraid of him. It felt like she had put her armor back on and transformed into an amazon once more. She smiled and looked him directly in the eye. Then he said what he was still hesitant to express:
‘You’ll breakfast with me, won’t you?’
'You'll have breakfast with me, right?'
But she refused the offer. ‘No, thank you. I am going to the station, where my trunk must have arrived by now, and then I shall drive to Passy.’
But she declined the offer. ‘No, thanks. I'm heading to the station, where my luggage should have arrived by now, and then I'll drive to Passy.’
It was in vain that he told her that she must be hungry, that it was unreasonable for her to go out without eating something.
It was pointless for him to tell her that she must be hungry, that it didn’t make sense for her to go out without eating something.
‘Well, if you won’t, I’ll go down and fetch you a cab,’ he ended by exclaiming.
'Well, if you won’t, I’ll go down and get you a cab,' he ended up saying.
‘Pray don’t take such trouble.’
“Please don’t go to such trouble.”
‘But you can’t go such a distance on foot. Let me at least take you to the cabstand, as you don’t know Paris.’
‘But you can’t walk that far. Let me at least take you to the taxi stand since you’re not familiar with Paris.’
‘No, really I do not need you. If you wish to oblige me, let me go away by myself.’
‘No, I really don’t need you. If you want to do me a favor, just let me go by myself.’
She had evidently made up her mind. She no doubt shrank from the idea of being seen with a man, even by strangers. She meant to remain silent about that strange night, she meant to tell some falsehood, and keep the recollection of her adventure entirely to herself. He made a furious gesture, which was tantamount to sending her to the devil. Good riddance; it suited him better not to have to go down. But, all the same, he felt hurt at heart, and considered that she was ungrateful.
She had clearly made her decision. She probably recoiled at the thought of being seen with a man, even by strangers. She planned to stay quiet about that strange night, to tell some lie, and to keep the memory of her adventure completely to herself. He made an angry gesture, which basically told her to get lost. Good riddance; it was easier for him not to have to deal with it. Still, he felt hurt inside and thought she was ungrateful.
‘As you please, then. I sha’n’t resort to force,’ he said.
‘As you wish, then. I won’t use force,’ he said.
At these words, Christine’s vague smile became more accentuated. She did not reply, but took her bonnet and looked round in search of a glass. Failing to find one, she tied the strings as best she could. With her arms uplifted, she leisurely arranged and smoothed the ribbons, her face turned towards the golden rays of the sun. Somewhat surprised, Claude looked in vain for the traits of childish softness that he had just portrayed; the upper part of her face, her clear forehead, her gentle eyes had become less conspicuous; and now the lower part stood out, with its somewhat sensual jaw, ruddy mouth, and superb teeth. And still she smiled with that enigmatical, girlish smile, which was, perhaps, an ironical one.
At those words, Christine’s vague smile grew more pronounced. She didn’t respond but grabbed her bonnet and looked around for a mirror. Not finding one, she tied the strings as best she could. With her arms raised, she slowly arranged and smoothed the ribbons, her face turned toward the sun's golden rays. Somewhat surprised, Claude searched in vain for the signs of childish softness he had just described; the upper part of her face, her clear forehead, and gentle eyes became less noticeable, while the lower part stood out more, with its somewhat sensual jaw, full lips, and stunning teeth. Yet she continued to smile with that mysterious, youthful grin, which might have been ironic.
‘At any rate,’ he said, in a vexed tone, ‘I do not think you have anything to reproach me with.’
'Anyway,' he said, sounding annoyed, 'I don't think you have anything to blame me for.'
At which she could not help laughing, with a slight, nervous laugh.
At that, she couldn't help but laugh, with a slight, nervous giggle.
‘No, no, monsieur, not in the least.’
‘No, no, sir, not at all.’
He continued staring at her, fighting the battle of inexperience and bashfulness over again, and fearing that he had been ridiculous. Now that she no longer trembled before him, had she become contemptuously surprised at having trembled at all? What! he had not made the slightest attempt at courtship, not even pressed a kiss on her finger-tips. The young fellow’s bearish indifference, of which she had assuredly been conscious, must have hurt her budding womanly feelings.
He kept looking at her, struggling with his inexperience and shyness, worried that he had looked foolish. Now that she didn’t seem nervous around him anymore, was she dismissively surprised that she had ever felt that way? What! He hadn’t even tried to flirt, not even kissing her fingertips. The guy’s clumsy indifference, which she must have definitely noticed, probably hurt her growing feelings as a woman.
‘You were saying,’ she resumed, becoming sedate once more, ‘that the cabstand is at the end of the bridge on the opposite quay?’
‘You were saying,’ she continued, becoming calm again, ‘that the taxi stand is at the end of the bridge on the other side?’
‘Yes; at the spot where there is a clump of trees.’
‘Yes; at the place where there's a cluster of trees.’
She had finished tying her bonnet strings, and stood ready gloved, with her hands hanging by her side, and yet she did not go, but stared straight in front of her. As her eyes met the big canvas turned to the wall she felt a wish to see it, but did not dare to ask. Nothing detained her; still she seemed to be looking around as if she had forgotten something there, something which she could not name. At last she stepped towards the door.
She had finished tying her bonnet strings and stood there, gloved, with her hands by her side, yet she didn’t leave; instead, she stared straight ahead. When her eyes fell on the large canvas facing the wall, she felt the urge to see it but didn’t dare to ask. Nothing was keeping her there, but she seemed to be looking around as if she had forgotten something, something she couldn’t identify. Finally, she walked towards the door.
Claude was already opening it, and a small loaf placed erect against the post tumbled into the studio.
Claude was already opening it, and a small loaf standing upright against the post fell into the studio.
‘You see,’ he said, ‘you ought to have stopped to breakfast with me. My doorkeeper brings the bread up every morning.’
‘You see,’ he said, ‘you should’ve stopped for breakfast with me. My doorkeeper brings up the bread every morning.’
She again refused with a shake of the head. When she was on the landing she turned round, and for a moment remained quite still. Her gay smile had come back; she was the first to hold out her hand.
She shook her head again in refusal. When she reached the landing, she turned around and stood still for a moment. Her cheerful smile had returned; she was the first to extend her hand.
‘Thank you, thank you very much.’
‘Thank you, thank you so much.’
He had taken her small gloved hand within his large one, all pastel-stained as it was. Both hands remained like that for a few moments, closely and cordially pressed. The young girl was still smiling at him, and he had a question on the tip of his tongue: ‘When shall I see you again?’ But he felt ashamed to ask it, and after waiting a while she withdrew her hand.
He had taken her tiny gloved hand in his larger one, even though it was all stained with pastel. They held their hands like that for a few moments, closely and warmly pressed together. The young girl was still smiling at him, and he had a question on the tip of his tongue: ‘When will I see you again?’ But he felt too shy to ask, and after waiting a bit, she pulled her hand back.
‘Good-bye, monsieur.’
'Goodbye, sir.'
‘Good-bye, mademoiselle.’
'Goodbye, miss.'
Christine, without another glance, was already descending the steep ladder-like stairway whose steps creaked, when Claude turned abruptly into his studio, closing the door with a bang, and shouting to himself: ‘Ah, those confounded women!’
Christine, without looking back, was already going down the steep, ladder-like stairs that creaked with each step. Just then, Claude turned sharply into his studio, slammed the door shut, and shouted to himself, "Ah, those damn women!"
He was furious—furious with himself, furious with everyone. Kicking about the furniture, he continued to ease his feelings in a loud voice. Was not he right in never allowing them to cross his threshold? They only turned a fellow’s head. What proof had he after all that yonder chit with the innocent look, who had just gone, had not fooled him most abominably? And he had been silly enough to believe in her cock-and-bull stories! All his suspicions revived. No one would ever make him swallow that fairy tale of the general’s widow, the railway accident, and especially the cabman. Did such things ever happen in real life? Besides, that mouth of hers told a strange tale, and her looks had been very singular just as she was going. Ah! if he could only have understood why she had told him all those lies; but no, they were profitless, inexplicable. It was art for art’s sake. How she must be laughing at him by this time.
He was furious—furious with himself, furious with everyone. Kicking the furniture, he kept expressing his feelings loudly. Wasn’t he right to never let them cross his threshold? They just confused him. What proof did he really have that the girl with the innocent look, who had just left, hadn’t completely tricked him? And he had been naive enough to believe her ridiculous stories! All his suspicions came flooding back. No one would ever convince him to accept that fairy tale about the general’s widow, the train accident, and especially the cab driver. Did things like that even happen in real life? Besides, her mouth told a weird story, and her expression had been very strange just as she was leaving. Ah! If only he could understand why she had told him all those lies; but no, they were pointless, baffling. It was art for art’s sake. She must be laughing at him by now.
He roughly folded up the screen and sent it flying into a corner. She had no doubt left all in disorder. And when he found that everything was in its proper place—basin, towel, and soap—he flew into a rage because she had not made the bed. With a great deal of fuss he began to make it himself, lifting the mattress in his arms, banging the pillow about with his fists, and feeling oppressed by the pure scent of youth that rose from everything. Then he had a good wash to cool himself, and in the damp towel he found the same virgin fragrance, which seemed to spread through the studio. Swearing the while, he drank his chocolate from the saucepan, so excited, so eager to set to work, as to swallow large mouthfuls of bread without taking breath.
He roughly folded up the screen and tossed it into a corner. She had no doubt left everything in disarray. And when he saw that everything was in its right place—basin, towel, and soap—he erupted in anger because she hadn't made the bed. With a lot of commotion, he started making it himself, lifting the mattress in his arms, banging the pillow with his fists, and feeling overwhelmed by the fresh scent of youth that came from everything. Then he washed up to cool off, and in the damp towel, he picked up the same pure fragrance that seemed to fill the studio. Cursing under his breath, he drank his chocolate straight from the saucepan, so excited and eager to get to work that he swallowed big chunks of bread without pausing for air.
‘Why, it’s enough to kill one here,’ he suddenly exclaimed. ‘It must be this confounded heat that’s making me ill.’
‘Why, it’s enough to make someone lose it here,’ he suddenly exclaimed. ‘It must be this damn heat that’s making me feel sick.’
After all, the sun had shifted, and it was far less hot. But he opened a small window on a level with the roof, and inhaled, with an air of profound relief, the whiff of warm air that entered. Then he took up his sketch of Christine’s head and for a long while he lingered looking at it.
After all, the sun had shifted, and it was much cooler. But he opened a small window at roof level and took a deep breath, feeling a wave of relief from the warm air that came in. Then he picked up his sketch of Christine’s head and spent a long time gazing at it.
II
IT had struck twelve, and Claude was working at his picture when there was a loud, familiar knock at the door. With an instinctive yet involuntary impulse, the artist slipped the sketch of Christine’s head, by the aid of which he was remodelling the principal figure of his picture, into a portfolio. After which he decided to open the door.
It had just turned midnight, and Claude was working on his painting when a loud, familiar knock came at the door. With a reflexive yet automatic movement, the artist quickly tucked the sketch of Christine’s head, which he was using to reshape the main figure of his painting, into a portfolio. After that, he decided to open the door.
‘You, Pierre!’ he exclaimed, ‘already!’
‘You, Pierre!’ he exclaimed, ‘already!’
Pierre Sandoz, a friend of his boyhood, was about twenty-two, very dark, with a round and determined head, a square nose, and gentle eyes, set in energetic features, girt round with a sprouting beard.
Pierre Sandoz, a childhood friend, was around twenty-two, very dark, with a round and determined head, a square nose, and gentle eyes, framed by energetic features, surrounded by a growing beard.
‘I breakfasted earlier than usual,’ he answered, ‘in order to give you a long sitting. The devil! you are getting on with it.’
‘I had breakfast earlier than usual,’ he replied, ‘so I could give you a long session. Wow! You’re really making progress.’
He had stationed himself in front of the picture, and he added almost immediately: ‘Hallo! you have altered the character of your woman’s features!’
He had positioned himself in front of the picture, and he quickly added, "Hey! You've changed the features of your woman!"
Then came a long pause; they both kept staring at the canvas. It measured about sixteen feet by ten, and was entirely painted over, though little of the work had gone beyond the roughing-out. This roughing-out, hastily dashed off, was superb in its violence and ardent vitality of colour. A flood of sunlight streamed into a forest clearing, with thick walls of verdure; to the left, stretched a dark glade with a small luminous speck in the far distance. On the grass, amidst all the summer vegetation, lay a nude woman with one arm supporting her head, and though her eyes were closed she smiled amidst the golden shower that fell around her. In the background, two other women, one fair, and the other dark, wrestled playfully, setting light flesh tints amidst all the green leaves. And, as the painter had wanted something dark by way of contrast in the foreground, he had contented himself with seating there a gentleman, dressed in a black velveteen jacket. This gentleman had his back turned and the only part of his flesh that one saw was his left hand, with which he was supporting himself on the grass.
Then there was a long pause; they both kept staring at the canvas. It was about sixteen feet by ten and completely painted over, though most of the work had only gone as far as the rough outlines. This roughing-out, quickly dashed off, was stunning in its intensity and vibrant color. A flood of sunlight poured into a forest clearing surrounded by thick greenery; to the left was a dark glade with a small glowing spot in the far distance. On the grass, among all the summer plants, lay a nude woman with one arm propping up her head, and even with her eyes closed, she smiled as golden light showered down around her. In the background, two other women, one fair and the other dark, playfully wrestled, adding touches of light flesh tones against all the green leaves. And, since the painter wanted something dark for contrast in the foreground, he settled on placing a gentleman dressed in a black velveteen jacket there. This gentleman had his back to them and the only visible part of him was his left hand, which he used to support himself on the grass.
‘The woman promises well,’ said Sandoz, at last; ‘but, dash it, there will be a lot of work in all this.’
‘The woman seems promising,’ said Sandoz, finally; ‘but, damn it, there’s going to be a lot of work involved in all this.’
Claude, with his eyes blazing in front of his picture, made a gesture of confidence. ‘I’ve lots of time from now till the Salon. One can get through a deal of work in six months. And perhaps this time I’ll be able to prove that I am not a brute.’
Claude, his eyes shining in front of his painting, gestured with confidence. “I have plenty of time from now until the Salon. You can get a lot done in six months. And maybe this time I can show that I’m not a savage.”
Thereupon he set up a whistle, inwardly pleased at the sketch he had made of Christine’s head, and buoyed up by one of those flashes of hope whence he so often dropped into torturing anguish, like an artist whom passion for nature consumed.
Thereafter, he set up a whistle, feeling satisfied with the drawing he had done of Christine’s head, and lifted by one of those moments of hope that often led him into painful despair, like an artist consumed by his love for nature.
‘Come, no more idling,’ he shouted. ‘As you’re here, let us set to.’
‘Come on, no more wasting time,’ he shouted. ‘Now that you're here, let's get started.’
Sandoz, out of pure friendship, and to save Claude the cost of a model, had offered to pose for the gentleman in the foreground. In four or five Sundays, the only day of the week on which he was free, the figure would be finished. He was already donning the velveteen jacket, when a sudden reflection made him stop.
Sandoz, just out of friendship and to spare Claude the expense of hiring a model, had offered to pose for the man in the foreground. In four or five Sundays, the only day of the week he was available, the figure would be complete. He was already putting on the velveteen jacket when a sudden thought made him pause.
‘But, I say, you haven’t really lunched, since you were working when I came in. Just go down and have a cutlet while I wait here.’
‘But I’m saying, you haven’t really had lunch, since you were busy when I came in. Just go down and grab a cutlet while I wait here.’
The idea of losing time revolted Claude. ‘I tell you I have breakfasted. Look at the saucepan. Besides, you can see there’s a crust of bread left. I’ll eat it. Come, to work, to work, lazy-bones.’
The idea of wasting time upset Claude. ‘I’m telling you I’ve had breakfast. Look at the saucepan. Plus, you can see there’s a piece of bread left. I’ll eat it. Now, let’s get to work, you slacker.’
And he snatched up his palette and caught his brushes, saying, as he did so, ‘Dubuche is coming to fetch us this evening, isn’t he?’
And he grabbed his palette and picked up his brushes, saying as he did, ‘Dubuche is coming to get us this evening, right?’
‘Yes, about five o’clock.’
"Yeah, around five o'clock."
‘Well, that’s all right then. We’ll go down to dinner directly he comes. Are you ready? The hand more to the left, and your head a little more forward.’
‘Well, that’s fine then. We’ll head down to dinner as soon as he arrives. Are you ready? Move your hand a bit to the left, and tilt your head a little more forward.’
Having arranged some cushions, Sandoz settled himself on the couch in the required attitude. His back was turned, but all the same the conversation continued for another moment, for he had that very morning received a letter from Plassans, the little Provençal town where he and the artist had known each other when they were wearing out their first pairs of trousers on the eighth form of the local college. However, they left off talking. The one was working with his mind far away from the world, while the other grew stiff and cramped with the sleepy weariness of protracted immobility.
Having arranged some cushions, Sandoz settled onto the couch in the required position. His back was turned, but the conversation continued for a moment because he had received a letter that morning from Plassans, the small Provençal town where he and the artist had known each other when they were just kids in the eighth grade at the local school. However, they stopped talking. One was lost in thought, far away from the world, while the other grew stiff and cramped from the tiredness of staying still for too long.
It was only when Claude was nine years old that a lucky chance had enabled him to leave Paris and return to the little place in Provence, where he had been born. His mother, a hardworking laundress,* whom his ne’er-do-well father had scandalously deserted, had afterwards married an honest artisan who was madly in love with her. But in spite of their endeavours, they failed to make both ends meet. Hence they gladly accepted the offer of an elderly and well-to-do townsman to send the lad to school and keep him with him. It was the generous freak of an eccentric amateur of painting, who had been struck by the little figures that the urchin had often daubed. And thus for seven years Claude had remained in the South, at first boarding at the college, and afterwards living with his protector. The latter, however, was found dead in his bed one morning. He left the lad a thousand francs a year, with the faculty of disposing of the principal when he reached the age of twenty-five. Claude, already seized with a passion for painting, immediately left school without even attempting to secure a bachelor’s degree, and rushed to Paris whither his friend Sandoz had preceded him.
It was only when Claude was nine years old that a fortunate opportunity allowed him to leave Paris and return to the small place in Provence where he was born. His mother, a hardworking laundress, who had been shamefully abandoned by his no-good father, later married a decent artisan who was deeply in love with her. But despite their efforts, they struggled to make ends meet. So they gladly accepted the offer from a wealthy elderly townsman to send the boy to school and take him in. This was the generous whim of an eccentric art lover who had been impressed by the little drawings the kid often made. For seven years, Claude stayed in the South, first boarding at the college and later living with his benefactor. However, one morning, his protector was found dead in bed. He left Claude a thousand francs a year, with the option to access the principal when he turned twenty-five. Already passionate about painting, Claude immediately dropped out of school without even trying to get a bachelor's degree and rushed to Paris, where his friend Sandoz had gone ahead of him.
* Gervaise of ‘The Dram Shop’(L’Assommoir).—ED.
* Gervaise from ‘The Dram Shop’ (L’Assommoir). —ED.
At the College of Plassans, while still in the lowest form, Claude Lantier, Pierre Sandoz, and another lad named Louis Dubuche, had been three inseparables. Sprung from three different classes of society, by no means similar in character, but simply born in the same year at a few months’ interval, they had become friends at once and for aye, impelled thereto by certain secret affinities, the still vague promptings of a common ambition, the dawning consciousness of possessing greater intelligence than the set of dunces who maltreated them. Sandoz’s father, a Spaniard, who had taken refuge in France in consequence of some political disturbances in which he had been mixed up, had started, near Plassans, a paper mill with new machinery of his own invention. When he had died, heart-broken by the petty local jealousy that had sought to hamper him in every way, his widow had found herself in so involved a position, and burdened with so many tangled law suits, that the whole of her remaining means were swallowed up. She was a native of Burgundy. Yielding to her hatred of the Provençals, and laying at their door even the slow paralysis from which she was suffering, she removed to Paris with her son, who then supported her out of a meagre clerk’s salary, he himself haunted by the vision of literary glory. As for Dubuche, he was the son of a baker of Plassans. Pushed by his mother, a covetous and ambitious woman, he had joined his friends in Paris later on. He was attending the courses at the School of Arts as a pupil architect, living as best he might upon the last five-franc pieces that his parents staked on his chances, with the obstinacy of usurers discounting the future at the rate of a hundred per cent.
At the College of Plassans, while they were still in the lowest grade, Claude Lantier, Pierre Sandoz, and another boy named Louis Dubuche had become inseparable friends. Coming from three very different social backgrounds and not at all alike in personality, they still formed a bond simply because they were all born in the same year within a few months of each other. They were drawn together by certain hidden connections, the unclear hints of a shared ambition, and a budding awareness that they were smarter than the group of dimwits who bullied them. Sandoz’s father, a Spaniard who had fled to France due to some political troubles, had started a paper mill near Plassans with innovative machinery he’d invented. When he died, heartbroken by the petty local jealousy that tried to undermine him, his widow found herself in a complicated mess of tangled lawsuits that consumed all her remaining resources. She was originally from Burgundy. Driven by her dislike for the Provençals, and blaming them even for the gradual illness she was suffering, she moved to Paris with her son, who then supported her on a meager clerk’s salary while he himself was haunted by dreams of literary fame. As for Dubuche, he was the son of a baker from Plassans. Encouraged by his mother, a greedy and ambitious woman, he later joined his friends in Paris. He was studying architecture at the School of Arts, living on the last few five-franc coins his parents risked on his future, stubbornly betting on his chances like usurers discounting fate at a hundred percent.
‘Dash it!’ at last exclaimed Sandoz, breaking the intense silence that hung upon the room. ‘This position isn’t at all easy; my wrist feels broken. Can I move for a moment?’
‘Darn it!’ Sandoz finally exclaimed, breaking the intense silence that filled the room. ‘This position isn’t easy at all; my wrist feels like it’s broken. Can I move for a moment?’
Claude let him stretch himself without answering. He was now working at the velveteen jacket, laying on the colour with thick strokes, However, stepping backward and blinking, he suddenly burst into loud laughter at some reminiscence.
Claude let him stretch without responding. He was now focused on the velveteen jacket, applying the color with bold strokes. However, when he stepped back and blinked, he suddenly burst into loud laughter at some memory.
‘I say, do you recollect, when we were in the sixth form, how, one day, Pouillaud lighted the candles in that idiot Lalubie’s cupboard? And how frightened Lalubie was when, before going to his desk, he opened the cupboard to take his books, and found it transformed into a mortuary chapel? Five hundred lines to every one in the form.’
‘I say, do you remember when we were in the sixth form, how, one day, Pouillaud lit the candles in that idiot Lalubie’s cupboard? And how scared Lalubie was when, before going to his desk, he opened the cupboard to grab his books and found it turned into a mortuary chapel? Five hundred lines for each person in the form.’
Sandoz, unable to withstand the contagion of the other’s gaiety, flung himself back on the couch. As he resumed his pose, he remarked, ‘Ah, that brute of a Pouillaud. You know that in his letter this morning he tells me of Lalubie’s forthcoming marriage. The old hack is marrying a pretty girl. But you know her, she’s the daughter of Gallissard, the haberdasher—the little fair-haired girl whom we used to serenade!’
Sandoz, unable to resist the infectious happiness of the others, threw himself back on the couch. As he settled into his position, he said, ‘Ah, that brute Pouillaud. You know, in his letter this morning, he told me about Lalubie’s upcoming marriage. The old guy is marrying a pretty girl. But you know her; she’s the daughter of Gallissard, the haberdasher—the little blonde girl we used to serenade!’
Once on the subject of their recollections there was no stopping them, though Claude went on painting with growing feverishness, while Pierre, still turned towards the wall, spoke over his shoulders, shaking every now and then with excitement.
Once they started sharing their memories, they couldn’t be stopped. Claude continued painting with increasing intensity, while Pierre, still facing the wall, spoke over his shoulder, trembling with excitement every now and then.
First of all came recollections of the college, the old, dank convent, that extended as far as the town ramparts; the two courtyards with their huge plane trees; the slimy sedge-covered pond, where they had learned to swim, and the class-rooms with dripping plaster walls on the ground floor; then the refectory, with its atmosphere constantly poisoned by the fumes of dish-water; the dormitory of the little ones, famous for its horrors, the linen room, and the infirmary, full of gentle sisters, nuns in black gowns who looked so sweet beneath their white coifs. What a to-do there had been when Sister Angela, she whose Madonna-like face had turned the heads of all the big fellows, disappeared one morning with Hermeline, a stalwart first-form lad, who, from sheer love, purposely cut his hands with his penknife so as to get an opportunity of seeing and speaking to her while she dressed his self-inflicted injuries with gold-beater’s skin.
First of all, memories of college came flooding back — the old, musty convent that stretched all the way to the town walls; the two courtyards lined with huge plane trees; the slimy pond covered in sedge, where they had learned to swim; and the classrooms with dripping plaster walls on the ground floor. Then there was the refectory, always filled with the smell of dishwater; the dormitory for the younger kids, notorious for its horrors; the linen room; and the infirmary, staffed by gentle sisters, nuns in black gowns who looked so sweet beneath their white headdresses. There had been such a commotion when Sister Angela, whose Madonna-like face had captivated all the older boys, vanished one morning with Hermeline, a sturdy first-year boy who, out of pure love, intentionally cut his hands with a penknife just to have the chance to see and talk to her while she bandaged his self-inflicted wounds with gold-beater's skin.
Then they passed the whole college staff in review; a pitiful, grotesque, and terrible procession it was, with such heads as are seen on meerschaum pipes, and profiles instinct with hatred and suffering. There was the head master, who ruined himself in giving parties, in order to marry his daughters—two tall, elegant girls, the butt of constant and abominable insults, written and sketched on every wall; there was the comptroller Pifard, whose wonderful nose betrayed his presence behind every door, when he went eavesdropping; and there were all the teachers, each befouled with some insulting nickname: the severe ‘Rhadamantus,’ who had never been seen to smile; ‘Filth,’ who by the constant rubbing of his head had left his mark on the wall behind every professional seat he occupied; ‘Thou-hast-deceived-me-Adèle,’ the professor of physics, at whom ten generations of schoolboys had tauntingly flung the name of his unfaithful wife. There were others still: Spontini, the ferocious usher, with his Corsican knife, rusty with the blood of three cousins; little Chantecaille, who was so good-natured that he allowed the pupils to smoke when out walking; and also a scullion and a scullery maid, two ugly creatures who had been nicknamed Paraboulomenos and Paralleluca, and who were accused of kissing one another over the vegetable parings.
Then they reviewed the entire college staff; it was a sad, ridiculous, and horrifying procession, with heads like those found on meerschaum pipes and faces full of hatred and suffering. There was the headmaster, who ruined himself throwing parties to marry off his daughters—two tall, graceful girls who were constant targets of despicable insults written and sketched on every wall; there was the comptroller Pifard, whose prominent nose betrayed his presence behind every door when he attempted to eavesdrop; and there were all the teachers, each burdened with a humiliating nickname: the stern 'Rhadamantus,' who had never been seen smiling; 'Filth,' whose constant head rubbing had left a mark on the wall behind every desk he occupied; 'Thou-hast-deceived-me-Adèle,' the physics professor, whom generations of students had mockingly called after his unfaithful wife. There were others too: Spontini, the fierce usher, with his Corsican knife, stained with the blood of three cousins; little Chantecaille, who was so easygoing that he let the students smoke while out for walks; and also a scullion and a scullery maid, two unattractive figures nicknamed Paraboulomenos and Paralleluca, who were accused of kissing each other over the vegetable scraps.
Then came comical reminiscences; the sudden recollection of practical jokes, at which they shook with laughter after all those years. Oh! the morning when they had burned the shoes of Mimi-la-Mort, alias the Skeleton Day Boarder, a lank lad, who smuggled snuff into the school for the whole of the form. And then that winter evening when they had bagged some matches lying near the lamp in the chapel, in order to smoke dry chestnut leaves in reed pipes. Sandoz, who had been the ringleader on that occasion, now frankly avowed his terror; the cold perspiration that had come upon him when he had scrambled out of the choir, wrapt in darkness. And again there was the day when Claude had hit upon the sublime idea of roasting some cockchafers in his desk to see whether they were good to eat, as people said they were. So terrible had been the stench, so dense the smoke that poured from the desk, that the usher had rushed to the water pitcher, under the impression that the place was on fire. And then their marauding expeditions; the pillaging of onion beds while they were out walking; the stones thrown at windows, the correct thing being to make the breakage resemble a well-known geographical map. Also the Greek exercises, written beforehand in large characters on the blackboard, so that every dunce might easily read them though the master remained unaware of it; the wooden seats of the courtyard sawn off and carried round the basin like so many corpses, the boys marching in procession and singing funeral dirges. Yes! that had been a capital prank. Dubuche, who played the priest, had tumbled into the basin while trying to scoop some water into his cap, which was to serve as a holy water pot. But the most comical and amusing of all the pranks had perhaps been that devised by Pouillaud, who one night had fastened all the unmentionable crockery of the dormitory to one long string passed under the beds. At dawn—it was the very morning when the long vacation began—he had pulled the string and skedaddled down the three flights of stairs with this frightful tail of crockery bounding and smashing to pieces behind him.
Then came funny memories; the sudden recall of practical jokes that had them doubled over with laughter after all those years. Oh! that morning when they burned the shoes of Mimi-la-Mort, alias the Skeleton Day Boarder, a skinny kid who smuggled snuff into the school for everyone. And then there was that winter evening when they scored some matches lying near the lamp in the chapel so they could smoke dry chestnut leaves in reed pipes. Sandoz, who had led that escapade, now openly admitted his fear; the cold sweat he felt when he scrambled out of the choir, wrapped in darkness. And again, there was the day when Claude came up with the brilliant idea of roasting some cockchafers in his desk to see if they really were good to eat, as people claimed. The smell had been so awful, and the smoke pouring out of the desk so thick, that the usher rushed to the water pitcher, thinking the place was on fire. Then there were their sneaky outings; raiding onion beds while walking; throwing stones at windows, trying to break them in a way that resembled a famous geographical map. Also, the Greek exercises, written out beforehand in large letters on the blackboard, so that even the slowest student could read them while the teacher remained clueless; the wooden seats from the courtyard sawed off and carried around the basin like corpses, the boys marching in a procession and singing funeral songs. Yes! that had been an excellent prank. Dubuche, who played the priest, fell into the basin while trying to scoop some water into his cap, which was meant to be a holy water pot. But perhaps the funniest and most entertaining of all the pranks was the one created by Pouillaud, who one night tied all the forbidden crockery from the dormitory to one long string passed under the beds. At dawn—it happened to be the very morning the long vacation started—he pulled the string and dashed down the three flights of stairs with this terrifying trail of crockery bouncing and smashing into pieces behind him.
At the recollection of this last incident, Claude remained grinning from ear to ear, his brush suspended in mid-air. ‘That brute of a Pouillaud!’ he laughed. ‘And so he has written to you. What is he doing now?’
At the memory of this last incident, Claude stayed grinning from ear to ear, his brush hanging in mid-air. ‘That jerk Pouillaud!’ he laughed. ‘And he’s written to you. What’s he up to now?’
‘Why, nothing at all, old man,’ answered Sandoz, seating himself more comfortably on the cushions. ‘His letter is idiotic. He is just finishing his law studies, and he will inherit his father’s practice as a solicitor. You ought to see the style he has already assumed—all the idiotic austerity of a philistine, who has turned over a new leaf.’
‘Why, nothing at all, old man,’ replied Sandoz, settling in more comfortably on the cushions. ‘His letter is ridiculous. He’s just finishing his law studies and is going to take over his dad’s practice as a solicitor. You should see the attitude he’s already adopted—all the absurd seriousness of a wannabe intellectual who thinks he’s turned over a new leaf.’
They were silent once more until Sandoz added, ‘You see, old boy, we have been protected against that sort of thing.’
They were quiet again until Sandoz said, "You see, my friend, we've been shielded from that kind of thing."
Then they relapsed again into reminiscences, but such as made their hearts thump; the remembrance of the many happy days they had spent far away from the college, in the open air and the full sunlight. When still very young, and only in the sixth form, the three inseparables had become passionately fond of taking long walks. The shortest holidays were eagerly seized upon to tramp for miles and miles; and, getting bolder as they grew up, they finished by scouring the whole of the country-side, by making journeys that sometimes lasted for days. They slept where they could, in the cleft of a rock, on some threshing-floor, still burning hot, where the straw of the beaten corn made them a soft couch, or in some deserted hut, the ground of which they covered with wild thyme and lavender. Those were flights far from the everyday world, when they became absorbed in healthy mother Nature herself, adoring trees and streams and mountains; revelling in the supreme joy of being alone and free.
Then they fell back into memories, but these were the kind that made their hearts race; remembering all the happy days they spent far from the college, out in the fresh air and bright sunlight. When they were still very young, just in the sixth form, the three best friends developed a deep love for long walks. They eagerly took advantage of even the shortest holidays to trek for miles and miles; and as they grew bolder, they ended up exploring the entire countryside, going on journeys that sometimes lasted for days. They slept wherever they could, in a rock crevice, on a still-warm threshing floor where the straw made a soft bed, or in some abandoned hut, covering the ground with wild thyme and lavender. Those were escapes from the everyday world, when they became immersed in the beauty of nature itself, cherishing trees, streams, and mountains; reveling in the pure joy of being alone and free.
Dubuche, who was a boarder, had only joined them on half-holidays and during the long vacation. Besides, his legs were heavy, and he had the quiet nature of a studious lad. But Claude and Sandoz never wearied; they awakened each other every Sunday morning by throwing stones at their respective shutters. In summer, above all, they were haunted by the thought of the Viorne, the torrent, whose tiny stream waters the low-lying pastures of Plassans. When scarcely twelve they already knew how to swim, and it became a passion with them to potter about in the holes where the water accumulated; to spend whole days there, stark naked, drying themselves on the burning sand, and then replunging into the river, living there as it were, on their backs, on their stomachs, searching among the reeds on the banks, immersed up to their ears, and watching the hiding-places of the eels for hours at a stretch. That constant contact of water beneath a burning sun prolonged their childhood, as it were, and lent them the joyous laughter of truant urchins, though they were almost young men, when of an evening they returned to the town amidst the still oppressive heat of a summer sunset. Later on they became very fond of shooting, but shooting such as is carried on in a region devoid of game, where they had to trudge a score of miles to pick off half a dozen pettychaps, or fig-peckers; wonderful expeditions, whence they returned with their bags empty, or with a mere bat, which they had managed to bring down while discharging their guns at the outskirts of the town. Their eyes moistened at the recollection of those happy days; they once more beheld the white endless roads, covered with layers of dust, as if there had been a fall of snow. They paced them again and again in their imagination, happy to hear the fancied creaking of their heavy shoes. Then they cut across the fields, over the reddish-brown ferruginous soil, careering madly on and on; and there was a sky of molten lead above them, not a shadow anywhere, nothing but dwarf olive trees and almond trees with scanty foliage. And then the delicious drowsiness of fatigue on their return, their triumphant bravado at having covered yet more ground than on the precious journey, the delight of being no longer conscious of effort, of advancing solely by dint of strength acquired, spurring themselves on with some terrible martial strain which helped to make everything like a dream.
Dubuche, who was staying with them as a boarder, only joined them on half-holidays and during the long vacation. Additionally, he had heavy legs and the quiet nature of a studious kid. But Claude and Sandoz never got tired; they woke each other up every Sunday morning by throwing stones at their windows. In summer, they were especially preoccupied with thoughts of the Viorne, the stream that waters the low-lying fields of Plassans. By the time they were barely twelve, they already knew how to swim, and they became passionate about splashing around in the pools where the water collected; spending entire days there, completely naked, drying off on the hot sand, and then jumping back into the river, living there as if they were weightless, searching among the reeds by the banks, submerged up to their ears, watching for eels' hiding spots for hours at a time. That constant contact with water under the blazing sun seemed to stretch their childhood, giving them the carefree laughter of mischievous kids, even though they were almost young men, when they returned to town in the still oppressive heat of a summer sunset. Later, they developed a fondness for hunting, but it was the kind of hunting done in areas without game, where they had to hike miles to shoot a few small birds or fig-peckers; amazing adventures, from which they returned with empty bags or just a bat they managed to bring down while shooting at the edges of town. Their eyes would moisten at the memory of those joyous days; they could once again see the endless white roads, coated in dust as if it had snowed. They had imagined walking those roads over and over, happy to hear the imagined creaking of their heavy shoes. Then they would cross the fields, over the reddish-brown soil, running wildly; and there was a sky like molten lead overhead, with no shade anywhere, just small olive and almond trees with sparse leaves. And then there was that delicious drowsiness from fatigue on their way back, their triumphant pride at having covered even more ground than on that precious journey, the joy of no longer feeling the effort, moving only from the strength they had built up, pushing themselves on with some intense, martial tune that made everything feel like a dream.
Already at that time Claude, in addition to his powder-flask and cartridge-belt, took with him an album, in which he sketched little bits of country, while Sandoz, on his side, always had some favourite poet in his pocket. They lived in a perfect frenzy of romanticism, winged strophes alternated with coarse garrison stories, odes were flung upon the burning, flashing, luminous atmosphere that enwrapt them. And when perchance they came upon a small rivulet, bordered by half a dozen willows, casting grey shadows on the soil all ablaze with colour, they at once went into the seventh heaven. They there by themselves performed the dramas they knew by heart, inflating their voices when repeating the speeches of the heroes, and reducing them to the merest whisper when they replied as queens and love-sick maidens. On such days the sparrows were left in peace. In that remote province, amidst the sleepy stupidity of that small town, they had thus lived on from the age of fourteen, full of enthusiasm, devoured by a passion for literature and art. The magnificent scenarios devised by Victor Hugo, the gigantic phantasies which fought therein amidst a ceaseless cross-fire of antithesis, had at first transported them into the fulness of epic glory; gesticulating, watching the sun decline behind some ruins, seeing life pass by amidst all the superb but false glitter of a fifth act. Then Musset had come to unman them with his passion and his tears; they heard their own hearts throb in response to his, a new world opened to them—a world more human—that conquered them by its cries for pity, and of eternal misery, which henceforth they were to hear rising from all things. Besides, they were not difficult to please; they showed the voracity of youth, a furious appetite for all kinds of literature, good and bad alike. So eager were they to admire something, that often the most execrable works threw them into a state of exaltation similar to that which the purest masterpieces produce.
At that time, Claude, along with his powder flask and cartridge belt, brought an album with him where he sketched bits of the countryside, while Sandoz always carried a favorite poet in his pocket. They lived in a whirlwind of romanticism, mixing lyric poetry with rough garrison tales, flinging odes into the hot, bright, vibrant atmosphere surrounding them. And when they happened upon a small stream lined with a few willows casting gray shadows on the colorful ground, they immediately felt euphoric. There, just the two of them, they acted out the plays they knew by heart, raising their voices for the heroic characters’ lines and whispering for the queens and lovesick maidens. On those days, the sparrows were left undisturbed. In that secluded area, amid the sleepy dullness of that small town, they thrived from the age of fourteen, filled with enthusiasm and a passion for literature and art. The stunning stories crafted by Victor Hugo transported them into epic glory at first; gesticulating and watching the sun set behind some ruins, they experienced life amidst the dazzling but false glamour of a play's final act. Then Musset came along and struck them with his passion and tears; they felt their own hearts echo his, and a new, more human world opened up to them—a world that captivated them with its cries for compassion and eternal suffering, which they would forever hear emanating from everything around them. Besides, they were easily pleased; they had the ravenous desire of youth, a fierce appetite for all types of literature, both good and bad. They were so eager to admire something that even the most terrible works could elevate them to a state of excitement similar to what the finest masterpieces inspired.
And as Sandoz now remarked, it was their great love of bodily exercise, their very revels of literature that had protected them against the numbing influence of their ordinary surroundings. They never entered a café, they had a horror of the streets, even pretending to moult in them like caged eagles, whereas their schoolfellows were already rubbing their elbows over the small marble tables and playing at cards for drinks. Provincial life, which dragged other lads, when still young, within its cogged mechanism, that habit of going to one’s club, of spelling out the local paper from its heading to the last advertisement, the everlasting game of dominoes no sooner finished than renewed, the same walk at the self-same hour and ever along the same roads—all that brutifies the mind, like a grindstone crushing the brain, filled them with indignation, called forth their protestations. They preferred to scale the neighbouring hills in search of some unknown solitary spot, where they declaimed verses even amidst drenching showers, without dreaming of shelter in their very hatred of town-life. They had even planned an encampment on the banks of the Viorne, where they were to live like savages, happy with constant bathing, and the company of five or six books, which would amply suffice for their wants. Even womankind was to be strictly banished from that camp. Being very timid and awkward in the presence of the gentler sex, they pretended to the asceticism of superior intellects. For two years Claude had been in love with a ‘prentice hat-trimmer, whom every evening he had followed at a distance, but to whom he had never dared to address a word. Sandoz nursed dreams of ladies met while travelling, beautiful girls who would suddenly spring up in some unknown wood, charm him for a whole day, and melt into air at dusk. The only love adventure which they had ever met with still evoked their laughter, so silly did it seem to them now. It consisted of a series of serenades which they had given to two young ladies during the time when they, the serenaders, had formed part of the college band. They passed their nights beneath a window playing the clarinet and the cornet-à-piston, and thus raising a discordant din which frightened all the folk of the neighbourhood, until one memorable evening the indignant parents had emptied all the water pitchers of the family over them.
And as Sandoz now noted, it was their strong passion for physical activity and their love for literature that protected them from the dullness of their everyday environment. They never went into a café, they were terrified of the streets, even pretending to shed their old selves like caged eagles, while their classmates were already huddled together at the small marble tables, playing cards for drinks. Provincial life, which pulled other boys into its rigid routine at a young age—the habit of going to one's club, reading the local paper from the headlines to the last ad, the endless game of dominoes that ended only to start again, the same walk at the same time along the same roads—brutalized their minds, like a grindstone crushing the brain, which filled them with outrage and prompted their protests. They preferred to climb the nearby hills in search of some unknown secluded spot, where they recited poetry even in pouring rain, without thinking of taking cover, driven by their disdain for city life. They had even planned a campsite by the banks of the Viorne, where they would live like savages, content with regular swims and five or six books, which would be more than enough for their needs. Even women were to be strictly excluded from that camp. Being very shy and awkward around the opposite sex, they pretended to follow the asceticism of superior minds. For two years, Claude had been in love with a young hat-trimmer, whom he followed every evening from a distance, but he never dared to speak to her. Sandoz dreamed of beautiful women he might meet while traveling, enchanting girls who would suddenly appear in some unknown grove, captivate him for a whole day, and then vanish at dusk. The only romantic experience they had ever had still made them laugh, it seemed so ridiculous now. It involved a series of serenades they had performed for two young ladies when they were part of the college band. They spent their nights under a window playing the clarinet and cornet, creating a raucous noise that scared all the people in the neighborhood, until one memorable evening, the furious parents poured all their water pitchers over them.
Ah! those were happy days, and how loving was the laughter with which they recalled them. On the walls of the studio hung a series of sketches, which Claude, it so happened, had made during a recent trip southward. Thus it seemed as if they were surrounded by the familiar vistas of bright blue sky overhanging a tawny country-side. Here stretched a plain dotted with little greyish olive trees as far as a rosy network of distant hills. There, between sunburnt russet slopes, the exhausted Viorne was almost running dry beneath the span of an old dust-bepowdered bridge, without a bit of green, nothing save a few bushes, dying for want of moisture. Farther on, the mountain gorge of the Infernets showed its yawning chasm amidst tumbled rocks, struck down by lightning, a huge chaos, a wild desert, rolling stony billows as far as the eye could reach. Then came all sorts of well remembered nooks: the valley of Repentance, narrow and shady, a refreshing oasis amid calcined fields; the wood of Les Trois Bons-Dieux, with hard, green, varnished pines shedding pitchy tears beneath the burning sun; the sheep walk of Bouffan, showing white, like a mosque, amidst a far-stretching blood-red plain. And there were yet bits of blinding, sinuous roads; ravines, where the heat seemed even to wring bubbling perspiration from the pebbles; stretches of arid, thirsty sand, drinking up rivers drop by drop; mole hills, goat paths, and hill crests, half lost in the azure sky.
Ah! Those were happy days, and how lovingly they laughed as they remembered them. On the walls of the studio hung a series of sketches that Claude had made during a recent trip south. It felt as if they were surrounded by the familiar views of a bright blue sky over a dusty countryside. There stretched a plain dotted with little gray olive trees all the way to a rosy network of distant hills. There, between sunburnt russet slopes, the exhausted Viorne was almost running dry beneath an old, dust-covered bridge, with not a bit of green in sight, just a few bushes, wilting from lack of moisture. Further on, the mountain gorge of the Infernets displayed its gaping chasm among scattered rocks, struck down by lightning—a huge mess, a wild desert, with stony waves rolling as far as the eye could see. Then came all sorts of well-remembered spots: the narrow, shady valley of Repentance, a refreshing oasis amid parched fields; the woods of Les Trois Bons-Dieux, filled with hard, green, shiny pines shedding sticky tears under the blazing sun; the sheep path of Bouffan, gleaming white like a mosque against a vast, blood-red plain. There were also blinding, winding roads; ravines where the heat seemed to squeeze sweat from the pebbles; stretches of dry, thirsty sand soaking up rivers drop by drop; mole hills, goat paths, and hilltops half lost in the blue sky.
‘Hallo!’ exclaimed Sandoz, turning towards one sketch, ‘what’s that?’
‘Hey!’ Sandoz exclaimed, turning towards one sketch, ‘what’s that?’
Claude, indignant, waved his palette. ‘What! don’t you remember? We were very nigh breaking our necks there. Surely you recollect the day we clambered from the very bottom of Jaumegarde with Dubuche? The rock was as smooth as your hand, and we had to cling to it with our nails, so that at one moment we could neither get up nor go down again. When we were once atop and about to cook our cutlets, we, you and I, nearly came to blows.’
Claude, fuming, waved his palette. “What? Don’t you remember? We almost broke our necks there. Surely you recall the day we climbed all the way from the bottom of Jaumegarde with Dubuche? The rock was as smooth as your hand, and we had to cling to it with our nails, so at one point, we couldn't go up or down. Once we made it to the top and were about to cook our cutlets, you and I nearly got into a fight.”
Sandoz now remembered. ‘Yes, yes; each had to roast his own cutlet on rosemary sticks, and, as mine took fire, you exasperated me by chaffing my cutlet, which was being reduced to cinders.’
Sandoz now recalled. ‘Yeah, yeah; everyone had to grill their own cutlet on rosemary sticks, and while mine was catching fire, you annoyed me by making fun of my cutlet, which was turning into ashes.’
They both shook with laughter, until the painter resumed his work, gravely concluding, ‘That’s all over, old man. There is to be no more idling at present.’
They both laughed until the painter got back to work and seriously said, ‘That’s enough, old man. No more slacking off for now.’
He spoke the truth. Since the three inseparables had realised their dream of meeting together in Paris, which they were bent upon conquering, their life had been terribly hard. They had tried to renew the long walks of old. On certain Sunday mornings they had started on foot from the Fontainebleau gate, had scoured the copses of Verrières, gone as far as the Bièvre, crossed the woods of Meudon and Bellevue, and returned home by way of Grenelle. But they taxed Paris with spoiling their legs; they scarcely ever left the pavement now, entirely taken up as they were with their struggle for fortune and fame.
He was telling the truth. Ever since the three inseparables had achieved their dream of meeting in Paris, which they were determined to conquer, their lives had been incredibly tough. They had tried to revive their long walks from the past. On some Sunday mornings, they would start from the Fontainebleau gate, explore the woods of Verrières, go as far as the Bièvre, cross through the woods of Meudon and Bellevue, and head back home via Grenelle. But they blamed Paris for ruining their legs; they hardly ever left the sidewalk now, completely consumed by their pursuit of success and recognition.
From Monday morning till Saturday night Sandoz sat fuming and fretting at the municipal building of the fifth Arrondissement in a dark corner of the registry office for births, rooted to his stool by the thought of his mother, whom his salary of a hundred and fifty francs a month helped in some fashion to keep. Dubuche, anxious to pay his parents the interest of the money placed on his head, was ever on the look-out for some petty jobs among architects, outside his studies at the School of Arts. As for Claude, thanks to his thousand francs a year, he had his full liberty; but the latter days of each month were terrible enough, especially if he had to share the fag-end of his allowance. Luckily he was beginning to sell a little; disposing of tiny canvases, at the rate of ten and twelve francs a-piece, to Papa Malgras, a wary picture dealer. After all, he preferred starvation to turning his art into mere commerce by manufacturing portraits of tradesmen and their wives; concocting conventional religious pictures or daubing blinds for restaurants or sign-boards for accoucheuses. When first he had returned to Paris, he had rented a very large studio in the Impasse des Bourdonnais; but he had moved to the Quai de Bourbon from motives of economy. He lived there like a savage, with an absolute contempt for everything that was not painting. He had fallen out with his relatives, who disgusted him; he had even ceased visiting his aunt, who kept a pork-butcher’s shop near the Central Markets, because she looked too flourishing and plump.* Respecting the downfall of his mother, who was being eaten out of doors and driven into the streets, he nursed a secret grief.
From Monday morning to Saturday night, Sandoz sat sulking and worrying at the municipal building in the fifth Arrondissement, stuck in a dark corner of the birth registry office, anchored to his stool by thoughts of his mother, whom his monthly salary of a hundred and fifty francs partially supported. Dubuche, eager to pay off the debt his parents had taken on for him, was always on the lookout for small jobs with architects, outside his studies at the School of Arts. As for Claude, thanks to his thousand-franc annual income, he had complete freedom; however, the last days of each month were pretty rough, especially if he had to stretch his limited allowance. Fortunately, he was starting to sell a little work, selling small canvases for ten to twelve francs each to Papa Malgras, a cautious art dealer. Ultimately, he preferred to go hungry rather than commercialize his art by producing portraits of local tradespeople and their spouses or cranking out conventional religious images or painting signs for restaurants or midwives. When he first returned to Paris, he rented a large studio in the Impasse des Bourdonnais, but he moved to the Quai de Bourbon to save money. He lived there in a nearly primitive way, completely disregarding everything that wasn't related to painting. He had fallen out with his relatives, who repulsed him; he even stopped visiting his aunt, who ran a pork butcher's shop near the Central Markets, because she seemed too healthy and well-fed. As for his mother’s decline, who was being left to fend for herself on the streets, he carried a hidden sadness.
* This aunt is Lisa of ‘The Fat and the Thin’ (Le Ventre de Paris) in a few chapters of which Claude figures.—ED.
* This aunt is Lisa from ‘The Fat and the Thin’ (Le Ventre de Paris) in a few chapters of which Claude appears.—ED.
Suddenly he shouted to Sandoz, ‘Will you be kind enough not to tumble to pieces?’ But Sandoz declared that he was getting stiff, and jumped from the couch to stretch his legs a bit. They took ten minutes’ rest, talking meanwhile about many things. Claude felt condescendingly good-tempered. When his work went smoothly he brightened up and became talkative; he, who painted with his teeth set, and raged inwardly directly he felt that nature was escaping him. Hence his friend had scarcely resumed his attitude before he went on chattering, without, however, missing a stroke of his brush.
Suddenly he shouted to Sandoz, “Could you please not fall apart?” But Sandoz said he was getting stiff, and jumped off the couch to stretch his legs a bit. They took a ten-minute break, talking about various things. Claude felt annoyingly good-tempered. When his work was going well, he perked up and became chatty; he, who painted with his teeth clenched, and felt frustrated the moment he sensed that nature was slipping away from him. So, as soon as his friend got back to his position, he started chatting again, without missing a beat with his brush.
‘It’s going on all right, old boy, isn’t it? You look all there in it. Oh, the brutes, I’ll just see whether they’ll refuse me this time. I am more severe for myself than they are for themselves, I’m sure of it; and whenever I pass one of my own pictures, it’s more serious than if it had passed before all the hanging committees on earth. You know my picture of the markets, with the two urchins tumbling about on a heap of vegetables? Well, I’ve scratched it all out, it didn’t come right. I found that I had got hold of a beastly machine,* a deal too heavy for my strength. But, never you fear, I’ll take the subject up again some day, when I know better, and I’ll take up others, machines which will knock them all cock-a-hoop with surprise.’
“It’s going well, isn’t it? You really fit in here. Oh, those tough critics, let me see if they turn me down this time. I’m harder on myself than they are on themselves, that’s for sure; and whenever I pass by one of my own paintings, it feels more important than if it were shown to every single judging committee out there. You remember my painting of the markets, with the two kids playing in a pile of vegetables? Well, I’ve completely wiped it out, it just didn’t work. I realized I was dealing with a terrible tool, far too heavy for me to handle. But don’t worry, I’ll tackle this subject again someday, when I’ve learned more, and I’ll take on other ideas that will completely blow them away.”
* In familiar conversation, French artists, playwrights, and novelists invariably call their productions by the slang term ‘machines.’—ED.
* In casual conversation, French artists, playwrights, and novelists always refer to their works using the slang term ‘machines.’—ED.
He made a magnificent gesture, as if to sweep a whole crowd away; emptied a tube of cobalt on his palette; and then began to jeer, asking what his first master would say to a picture like this? His first master indeed, Papa Belloque, a retired infantry captain, with one arm, who for a quarter of a century had taught drawing to the youth of Plassans in one of the galleries of the Museum! Then, in Paris, hadn’t the celebrated Berthou, the painter of ‘Nero in the Circus’—Berthou, whose lessons he had attended for six long months—told him a score of times that he would never be able to do anything? How he now regretted those six months wasted in idiotic efforts, absurd ‘studies,’ under the iron rule of a man whose ideas differed so much from his own. He at last began to hold forth against working at the Louvre. He would, he said, sooner chop his hand off than return there to spoil his perception of nature by undertaking one of those copies which for ever dim the vision of the world in which one lives.
He made a grand gesture, as if to push a whole crowd away; emptied a tube of cobalt onto his palette; and then started mocking, asking what his first teacher would say about a painting like this? His first teacher, indeed, Papa Belloque, a retired infantry captain with one arm, who had taught drawing to young people in Plassans for a quarter of a century in one of the museum's galleries! And in Paris, hadn’t the famous Berthou, the painter of ‘Nero in the Circus’—Berthou, whose classes he had attended for six long months—told him over and over that he would never accomplish anything? How he now regretted those six months wasted on pointless efforts, ridiculous ‘studies,’ under the strict guidance of a man whose ideas were so different from his own. He finally began to rant against working at the Louvre. He said he would rather chop his hand off than go back there to ruin his understanding of nature by doing one of those copies that forever blur the vision of the world around him.
Was there aught else in art than the rendering of what one felt within oneself? Was not the whole of art reduced to placing a woman in front of one—and then portraying her according to the feelings that she inspired? Was not a bunch of carrots—yes, a bunch of carrots—studied from nature, and painted unaffectedly, in a personal style, worth all the ever-lasting smudges of the School of Arts, all that tobacco-juice painting, cooked up according to certain given recipes? The day would come when one carrot, originally rendered, would lead to a revolution. It was because of this that he now contented himself with going to the Boutin studio, a free studio, kept by a former model, in the Rue de la Huchette. When he had paid his twenty francs he was put in front of as many men and women as he cared for, and set about his work with a will, never thinking of eating or drinking, but struggling unrestingly with nature, mad almost with the excitement of work, by the side of a pack of dandies who accused him of ignorant laziness, and arrogantly prated about their ‘studies,’ because they copied noses and mouths, under the eye of a master.
Was there anything in art besides expressing what one felt inside? Wasn't art all about placing a woman in front of you and then capturing her based on the emotions she stirred? Was a bunch of carrots—yes, a bunch of carrots—studied from life and painted in an honest, personal style not worth more than all the endless smudges from the School of Arts, all that tobacco-stained painting made according to certain set rules? One day, just one carrot, painted authentically, could spark a revolution. That’s why he was okay with going to the Boutin studio, a free studio run by a former model on Rue de la Huchette. Once he paid his twenty francs, he could work in front of as many men and women as he wanted, diving into his task with full energy, never thinking about eating or drinking, but tirelessly wrestling with nature, almost mad with the thrill of creation, alongside a group of dandy guys who called him lazy and proudly talked about their ‘studies’ because they copied noses and mouths under the watch of a master.
‘Listen to this, old man: when one of those whipper-snappers can build up a torso like that one over yonder, he may come up and tell me, and we’ll have a talk together.’
‘Listen to this, old man: when one of those youngsters can build up a torso like that one over there, he can come up and talk to me, and we’ll have a conversation together.’
With the end of his brush he pointed to a study of the nude, suspended from the wall near the door. It was really magnificent, full of masterly breadth of colouring. By its side were some other admirable bits, a girl’s feet exquisite in their delicate truthfulness, and a woman’s trunk with quivering satin-like skin. In his rare moments of content he felt proud of those few studies, the only ones which satisfied him, which, as it were, foretold a great painter, admirably gifted, but hampered by sudden and inexplicable fits of impotency.
With the end of his brush, he pointed to a painting of a nude, hanging on the wall near the door. It was truly magnificent, with a masterful use of color. Next to it were some other remarkable pieces: a girl’s feet, stunning in their delicate realism, and a woman’s torso with skin that shimmered like satin. In his rare moments of happiness, he felt proud of those few studies, the only ones that truly satisfied him, which seemed to hint at a great painter, incredibly talented, but hindered by sudden and inexplicable bouts of inability.
Dealing sabre-like strokes at the velveteen jacket, he continued lashing himself into excitement with his uncompromising theories which respected nobody:
Dealing swift, sharp strikes at the velvety jacket, he kept whipping himself into a frenzy with his unyielding theories that disregarded everyone:
‘They are all so many daubers of penny prints, who have stolen their reputations; a set of idiots or knaves on their knees before public imbecility! Not one among them dares to give the philistines a slap in the face. And, while we are about it, you know that old Ingres turns me sick with his glairy painting. Nevertheless, he’s a brick, and a plucky fellow, and I take off my hat to him, for he did not care a curse for anybody, and he used to draw like the very devil. He ended by making the idiots, who nowadays believe they understand him, swallow that drawing of his. After him there are only two worth speaking of, Delacroix and Courbet. The others are only numskulls. Oh, that old romantic lion, the carriage of him! He was a decorator who knew how to make the colours blaze. And what a grasp he had! He would have covered every wall in Paris if they had let him; his palette boiled, and boiled over. I know very well that it was only so much phantasmagoria. Never mind, I like it for all that, as it was needed to set the School on fire. Then came the other, a stout workman—that one, the truest painter of the century, and altogether classical besides, a fact which not one of the dullards understood. They yelled, of course; they shouted about profanation and realism, when, after all, the realism was only in the subject. The perception remained that of the old masters, and the execution resumed and continued the best bits of work one can find in our public galleries. Both Delacroix and Courbet came at the proper time. Each made a stride forward. And now—ah, now!’
‘They’re all just a bunch of hacks churning out cheap art, who have stolen their reputations; a group of fools or crooks bowing down to public ignorance! Not one of them dares to challenge the clueless masses. And while we’re at it, that old Ingres makes me sick with his slimy painting. Still, he’s a solid guy, a brave one, and I respect him because he didn’t care what anyone thought, and he used to draw like a madman. In the end, he even made the idiots who think they understand him swallow that drawing of his. After him, there are only two artists worth mentioning, Delacroix and Courbet. The rest are just dimwits. Oh, that old romantic lion, what a character! He was a decorator who knew how to make colors pop. And what a talent he had! He would have painted every wall in Paris if they’d let him; his palette was always boiling over. I know very well it was all just illusion. Still, I like it because it was needed to ignite the movement. Then came the other one, a hard worker—he’s the true painter of the century, and he’s classical too, a fact that none of the dullards appreciated. They shouted about profanation and realism when, in reality, the realism was just in the subject. The perception was still that of the old masters, and the execution captured the best pieces you can find in our public galleries. Both Delacroix and Courbet arrived at the right moment. Each made a breakthrough. And now—ah, now!’
He ceased speaking and drew back a few steps to judge of the effect of his picture, becoming absorbed in contemplation for a moment, and then resuming:
He stopped talking and stepped back a bit to gauge the impact of his painting, getting lost in thought for a moment before continuing:
‘Yes, nowadays we want something different—what, I don’t exactly know. If I did, and could do it, I should be clever indeed. No one else would be in the race with me. All I do know and feel is that Delacroix’s grand romantic scenes are foundering and splitting, that Courbet’s black painting already reeks of the mustiness of a studio which the sun never penetrates. You understand me, don’t you? We, perhaps, want the sun, the open air, a clear, youthful style of painting, men and things such as they appear in the real light. In short, I myself am unable to say what our painting should be; the painting that our eyes of to-day should execute and behold.’
‘Yeah, these days we’re looking for something different—what exactly, I’m not sure. If I knew and could make it happen, I’d really be something special. No one else would stand a chance against me. All I know and feel is that Delacroix’s grand romantic scenes are sinking and falling apart, that Courbet’s dark paintings already smell stale like a studio that never sees the sun. You get what I mean, right? We probably want sunlight, the outdoors, a fresh, youthful style of painting, people and things as they actually look in real light. In short, I can’t really explain what our painting should be; the kind of painting that our eyes today should create and appreciate.’
His voice again fell; he stammered and found himself unable to explain the formulas of the future that were rising within him. Deep silence came while he continued working at the velveteen jacket, quivering all the time.
His voice faltered again; he stuttered and couldn't find a way to express the ideas of the future bubbling up inside him. A deep silence fell as he kept working on the velveteen jacket, trembling the whole time.
Sandoz had been listening to him without stirring from his position. His back was still turned, and he said slowly, as if speaking to the wall in a kind of dream:
Sandoz had been listening to him without moving from his spot. His back was still turned, and he said slowly, as if talking to the wall in a sort of dream:
‘No; one does not know, and still we ought to know. But each time a professor has wanted to impress a truth upon me, I have mistrustfully revolted, thinking: “He is either deceiving himself or deceiving me.” Their ideas exasperate me. It seems to me that truth is larger, more general. How beautiful would it be if one could devote the whole of one’s existence to one single work, into which one would endeavour to put everything, the beasts of the field as well as mankind; in short, a kind of immense ark. And not in the order indicated by manuals of philosophy, or according to the idiotic hierarchy on which we pride ourselves, but according to the full current of life; a world in which we should be nothing more than an accident, in which the passing cur, even the stones of the roads, would complete and explain us. In sum, the grand whole, without low or high, or clean or unclean, such as it indeed is in reality. It is certainly to science that poets and novelists ought to address themselves, for it is the only possible source of inspiration to-day. But what are we to borrow from it? How are we to march in its company? The moment I begin to think about that sort of thing I feel that I am floundering. Ah, if I only knew, what a series of books I would hurl at the heads of the crowd!’
‘No; we don’t really know, yet we should. But every time a professor tries to share a truth with me, I’ve pushed back distrustfully, thinking, “He’s either fooling himself or me.” Their ideas frustrate me. I feel like truth is broader, more inclusive. How amazing would it be to devote your entire life to one single work, putting everything into it, from wildlife to humanity; basically, a huge ark. And not in the way that philosophy books suggest, or according to the silly hierarchy we boast about, but following the true flow of life; a world where we’re just an accident, where even a stray dog or the stones on the road would complete and explain us. In short, the whole picture, with no low or high, clean or dirty, just as it really is. Poets and novelists should definitely turn to science, as it’s the only real source of inspiration today. But what can we take from it? How do we move alongside it? The moment I start thinking about that, I feel lost. Ah, if only I knew, what a pile of books I would throw at the crowd!’
He also became silent. The previous winter he had published his first book: a series of little sketches, brought from Plassans, among which only a few rougher notes indicated that the author was a mutineer, a passionate lover of truth and power. And lately he had been feeling his way, questioning himself while all sorts of confused ideas throbbed in his brain. At first, smitten with the thought of undertaking something herculean, he had planned a genesis of the universe, in three phases or parts; the creation narrated according to science; mankind supervening at the appointed hour and playing its part in the chain of beings and events; then the future—beings constantly following one another, and finishing the creation of the world by the endless labour of life. But he had calmed down in presence of the venturesome hypotheses of this third phase; and he was now looking out for a more restricted, more human framework, in which, however, his vast ambition might find room.
He also fell silent. The previous winter he had published his first book: a collection of short sketches from Plassans, where only a few rough notes hinted that the author was a rebel, a passionate lover of truth and power. Recently, he had been exploring his thoughts, questioning himself while all sorts of mixed ideas pulsed through his mind. Initially, captivated by the idea of taking on something monumental, he had planned a creation of the universe, divided into three parts; the creation explained through science; humanity emerging at the right moment and playing its role in the chain of beings and events; and then the future—beings continually following one another, completing the creation of the world through the endless work of life. But he had calmed down in light of the daring ideas in that third part; now he was searching for a more limited, more human context, where, nevertheless, his grand ambition could fit.
‘Ah, to be able to see and paint everything,’ exclaimed Claude, after a long interval. ‘To have miles upon miles of walls to cover, to decorate the railway stations, the markets, the municipal offices, everything that will be built, when architects are no longer idiots. Only strong heads and strong muscles will be wanted, for there will be no lack of subjects. Life such as it runs about the streets, the life of the rich and the poor, in the market places, on the race-courses, on the boulevards, in the populous alleys; and every trade being plied, and every passion portrayed in full daylight, and the peasants, too, and the beasts of the fields and the landscapes—ah! you’ll see it all, unless I am a downright brute. My very hands are itching to do it. Yes! the whole of modern life! Frescoes as high as the Pantheon! A series of canvases big enough to burst the Louvre!’
‘Ah, to see and paint everything,’ Claude exclaimed after a long pause. ‘To have miles and miles of walls to cover, to decorate train stations, markets, city offices, and everything that will be built when architects finally get it right. All that's needed are strong minds and strong bodies, because there will be no shortage of subjects. Life as it happens in the streets, the lives of both the rich and the poor, in the markets, at the racetracks, on the boulevards, and in the busy alleyways; with every trade being practiced, and every passion captured in broad daylight, and the farmers too, and the animals from the fields along with the landscapes—ah! You’ll see it all, unless I’m completely unfeeling. My hands are itching to make it happen. Yes! The entirety of modern life! Murals as tall as the Pantheon! A series of canvases so large they'd burst the Louvre!’
Whenever they were thrown together the painter and the author generally reached this state of excitement. They spurred each other mutually, they went mad with dreams of glory; and there was such a burst of youth, such a passion for work about their plans, that they themselves often smiled afterwards at those great, proud dreams which seemed to endow them with suppleness, strength, and spirit.
Whenever the painter and the author were brought together, they usually found themselves in a state of excitement. They inspired each other, getting carried away with dreams of glory; and there was such a burst of youth and such a passion for their work in their plans that they often looked back and smiled at those grand, proud dreams that made them feel flexible, strong, and full of life.
Claude, who had stepped back as far as the wall, remained leaning against it, and gazing at his work. Seeing which, Sandoz, overcome by fatigue, left the couch and joined him. Then both looked at the picture without saying a word. The gentleman in the velveteen jacket was entirely roughed in. His hand, more advanced than the rest, furnished a pretty fresh patch of flesh colour amid the grass, and the dark coat stood out so vigorously that the little silhouettes in the background, the two little women wrestling in the sunlight, seemed to have retreated further into the luminous quivering of the glade. The principal figure, the recumbent woman, as yet scarcely more than outlined, floated about like some aerial creature seen in dreams, some eagerly desired Eve springing from the earth, with her features vaguely smiling and her eyelids closed.
Claude, who had stepped back as far as he could against the wall, leaned there, staring at his work. Seeing this, Sandoz, totally worn out, got off the couch and joined him. They both looked at the painting in silence. The man in the velvet jacket was completely blocked in. His hand, more developed than the rest of the figure, created a nice fresh patch of skin tone against the grass, and the dark coat stood out so strongly that the little silhouettes in the background, the two women playing in the sunlight, seemed to pull back even further into the shimmering light of the clearing. The main figure, the woman lying down, was still barely more than an outline, floating like some ethereal being in a dream, an eagerly wished-for Eve rising from the earth, with a vaguely smiling face and her eyelids shut.
‘Well, now, what are you going to call it?’ asked Sandoz.
‘Well, what are you going to call it?’ asked Sandoz.
‘The Open Air,’ replied Claude, somewhat curtly.
‘The Open Air,’ Claude replied, a bit abruptly.
The title sounded rather technical to the writer, who, in spite of himself, was sometimes tempted to introduce literature into pictorial art.
The title sounded pretty technical to the writer, who, despite himself, was occasionally tempted to bring literature into visual art.
‘The Open Air! that doesn’t suggest anything.’
‘The Open Air! That doesn’t mean anything.’
‘There is no occasion for it to suggest anything. Some women and a man are reposing in a forest in the sunlight. Does not that suffice? Don’t fret, there’s enough in it to make a masterpiece.’
‘There’s no need for it to imply anything. Some women and a man are relaxing in a forest under the sunlight. Isn’t that enough? Don’t worry, there’s plenty here to create a masterpiece.’
He threw back his head and muttered between his teeth: ‘Dash it all! it’s very black still. I can’t get Delacroix out of my eye, do what I will. And then the hand, that’s Courbet’s manner. Everyone of us dabs his brush into the romantic sauce now and then. We had too much of it in our youth, we floundered in it up to our very chins. We need a jolly good wash to get clear of it.’
He threw his head back and muttered through clenched teeth, "Damn it! It’s still really dark. I can’t get Delacroix out of my mind, no matter what I do. And the hand—that's Courbet’s style. Each of us dips our brush into that romantic vibe now and then. We had too much of it when we were young; we were completely submerged in it. We need a good rinse to wash it away."
Sandoz shrugged his shoulders with a gesture of despair. He also bewailed the fact that he had been born at what he called the confluence of Hugo and Balzac. Nevertheless, Claude remained satisfied, full of the happy excitement of a successful sitting. If his friend could give him two or three more Sundays the man in the jacket would be all there. He had enough of him for the present. Both began to joke, for, as a rule, Claude almost killed his models, only letting them go when they were fainting, half dead with fatigue. He himself now very nigh dropped, his legs bending under him, and his stomach empty. And as the cuckoo clock struck five, he snatched at his crust of bread and devoured it. Thoroughly worn out, he broke it with trembling fingers, and scarcely chewed it, again standing before his picture, pursued by his passion to such a degree as to be unconscious even that he was eating.
Sandoz shrugged in despair. He lamented that he had been born at what he called the intersection of Hugo and Balzac. Still, Claude felt satisfied, filled with the joy of a successful session. If his friend could give him a couple more Sundays, the man in the jacket would be fully captured. For now, he had enough of him. They both started joking, since usually Claude pushed his models to their limits, only letting them go when they were fainting, nearly dead from exhaustion. He was close to doing the same himself, his legs buckling and his stomach empty. As the cuckoo clock chimed five, he grabbed a piece of bread and devoured it. Completely exhausted, he broke it apart with trembling fingers and hardly chewed it, standing again before his painting, consumed by his passion to the point that he didn’t even realize he was eating.
‘Five o’clock,’ said Sandoz, as he stretched himself, with his arms upraised. ‘Let’s go and have dinner. Ah! here comes Dubuche, just in time.’
‘Five o’clock,’ said Sandoz, stretching his arms up. ‘Let’s go grab dinner. Ah! here comes Dubuche, right on time.’
There was a knock at the door, and Dubuche came in. He was a stout young fellow, dark, with regular but heavy features, close-cropped hair, and moustaches already full-blown. He shook hands with both his friends, and stopped before the picture, looking nonplussed. In reality that harum-scarum style of painting upset him, such was the even balance of his nature, such his reverence as a steady student for the established formulas of art; and it was only his feeling of friendship which, as a rule, prevented him from criticising. But this time his whole being revolted visibly.
There was a knock at the door, and Dubuche walked in. He was a sturdy young guy, dark-skinned, with strong but heavy features, closely cropped hair, and fully developed mustaches. He shook hands with both his friends and paused in front of the painting, looking confused. The chaotic style of the artwork actually disturbed him, given his balanced personality and his respect as a dedicated student for traditional art forms; usually, his friendship held him back from criticizing. But this time, he couldn’t hide his discomfort.
‘Well, what’s the matter? Doesn’t it suit you?’ asked Sandoz, who was watching him.
‘Well, what’s wrong? Doesn’t it work for you?’ asked Sandoz, who was observing him.
‘Yes, oh yes, it’s very well painted—but—’
‘Yes, oh yes, it’s painted very well—but—’
‘Well, spit it out. What is it that ruffles you?’
‘Well, just say it. What’s bothering you?’
‘Not much, only the gentleman is fully dressed, and the women are not. People have never seen anything like that before.’
‘Not much, just that the guy is fully dressed, and the women aren't. People have never seen anything like that before.’
This sufficed to make both the others wild. Why, were there not a hundred pictures in the Louvre composed in precisely the same way? Hadn’t all Paris and all the painters and tourists of the world seen them? And besides, if people had never seen anything like it, they would see it now. After all, they didn’t care a fig for the public!
This was enough to drive the others crazy. Were there not a hundred paintings in the Louvre that were made in exactly the same style? Hadn’t everyone in Paris, along with all the artists and tourists from around the world, seen them? Plus, if people had never come across anything like it before, they would now. After all, they didn’t care at all about the public!
Not in the least disconcerted by these violent replies, Dubuche repeated quietly: ‘The public won’t understand—the public will think it indecorous—and so it is!’
Not at all bothered by these harsh responses, Dubuche calmly repeated: ‘The public won’t get it—the public will find it inappropriate—and so it is!’
‘You wretched bourgeois philistine!’ exclaimed Claude, exasperated. ‘They are making a famous idiot of you at the School of Arts. You weren’t such a fool formerly.’
‘You miserable bourgeois philistine!’ Claude shouted, frustrated. ‘They’re making a complete fool of you at the School of Arts. You weren’t this stupid before.’
These were the current amenities of his two friends since Dubuche had attended the School of Arts. He thereupon beat a retreat, rather afraid of the turn the dispute was taking, and saved himself by belabouring the painters of the School. Certainly his friends were right in one respect, the School painters were real idiots. But as for the architects, that was a different matter. Where was he to get his tuition, if not there? Besides his tuition would not prevent him from having ideas of his own, later on. Wherewith he assumed a very revolutionary air.
These were the current benefits of his two friends since Dubuche had gone to the School of Arts. He then backed off, a bit scared of how the argument was going, and saved himself by criticizing the painters at the School. His friends were definitely right about one thing: the School's painters were complete fools. But the architects were a different story. Where else was he supposed to get his education, if not there? Plus, his education wouldn’t stop him from having his own ideas later on. With that, he took on a very revolutionary attitude.
‘All right,’ said Sandoz, ‘the moment you apologise, let’s go and dine.’
‘Okay,’ said Sandoz, ‘as soon as you apologize, let’s go eat.’
But Claude had mechanically taken up a brush and set to work again. Beside the gentleman in the velveteen jacket the figure of the recumbent woman seemed to be fading away. Feverish and impatient, he traced a bold outline round her so as to bring her forward.
But Claude had automatically picked up a brush and started working again. Next to the man in the velveteen jacket, the image of the reclining woman appeared to be disappearing. Anxious and restless, he drew a strong outline around her to make her stand out.
‘Are you coming?’
"Are you coming?"
‘In a minute; hang it, what’s the hurry? Just let me set this right, and I’ll be with you.’
‘Just a minute; what's the rush? Just let me fix this, and I'll be right there with you.’
Sandoz shook his head and then remarked very quietly, lest he should still further annoy him: ‘You do wrong to worry yourself like that, old man. Yes, you are knocked up, and have had nothing to eat, and you’ll only spoil your work, as you did the other day.’
Sandoz shook his head and then said softly, so he wouldn't annoy him even more: ‘You’re making a mistake by worrying like that, old man. Yes, you’re exhausted and haven’t eaten anything, and you’ll just mess up your work, like you did the other day.’
But the painter waved him off with a peevish gesture. It was the old story—he did not know when to leave off; he intoxicated himself with work in his craving for an immediate result, in order to prove to himself that he held his masterpiece at last. Doubts had just driven him to despair in the midst of his delight at having terminated a successful sitting. Had he done right, after all, in making the velveteen jacket so prominent, and would he not afterwards fail to secure the brilliancy which he wished the female figure to show? Rather than remain in suspense he would have dropped down dead on the spot. Feverishly drawing the sketch of Christine’s head from the portfolio where he had hidden it, he compared it with the painting on the canvas, assisting himself, as it were, by means of this document derived from life.
But the painter waved him off with an annoyed gesture. It was the same old story—he just didn’t know when to stop; he became consumed by his work in his desire for immediate results, trying to prove to himself that he finally had his masterpiece. Doubts had just driven him to despair right when he was feeling happy about finishing a successful sitting. Had he really done the right thing by making the velveteen jacket so noticeable, and would he later struggle to achieve the brilliance he wanted for the female figure? He would rather just drop dead than stay in suspense. Feverishly pulling out the sketch of Christine’s head from the portfolio where he had hidden it, he compared it with the painting on the canvas, almost using this lifelike document to help him.
‘Hallo!’ exclaimed Dubuche, ‘where did you get that from? Who is it?’
'Hey!' exclaimed Dubuche, 'where did you get that? Who is it?'
Claude, startled by the questions, did not answer; then, without reflecting, he who usually told them everything, brusquely lied, prompted by a delicate impulse to keep silent respecting the adventure of the night.
Claude, caught off guard by the questions, didn’t reply; then, without thinking, he who usually shared everything, abruptly lied, driven by a subtle instinct to stay quiet about the events of the night.
‘Tell us who it is?’ repeated the architect.
‘Who is it?’ the architect asked again.
‘Nobody at all—a model.’
"Nobody at all—an example."
‘A model! a very young one, isn’t she? She looks very nice. I wish you would give me her address. Not for myself, but for a sculptor I know who’s on the look-out for a Psyche. Have you got the address there?’
‘A model! A really young one, right? She looks great. I wish you’d give me her address. Not for me, but for a sculptor I know who’s looking for a Psyche. Do you have the address?’
Thereupon Dubuche turned to a corner of the greyish wall on which the addresses of several models were written in chalk, haphazard. The women particularly left their cards in that way, in awkward, childish handwriting. Zoé Piedefer, 7 Rue Campagne-Première, a big brunette, who was getting rather too stout, had scrawled her sign manual right across the names of little Flore Beauchamp, 32 Rue de Laval, and Judith Vaquez, 69 Rue du Rocher, a Jewess, both of whom were too thin.
Then Dubuche turned to a corner of the grayish wall where several addresses were written in chalk, scattered haphazardly. The women especially left their cards like that, in clumsy, childlike handwriting. Zoé Piedefer, 7 Rue Campagne-Première, a tall brunette who was becoming a bit overweight, had scribbled her signature right over the names of little Flore Beauchamp, 32 Rue de Laval, and Judith Vaquez, 69 Rue du Rocher, a Jewish woman, both of whom were too skinny.
‘I say, have you got the address?’ resumed Dubuche.
"I say, do you have the address?" Dubuche continued.
Then Claude flew into a passion. ‘Don’t pester me! I don’t know and don’t care. You’re a nuisance, worrying like that just when a fellow wants to work.’
Then Claude exploded in anger. ‘Stop bothering me! I don’t know and I don’t care. You’re a pain, worrying like that when I’m just trying to get some work done.’
Sandoz had not said a word. Surprised at first, he had soon smiled. He was gifted with more penetration than Dubuche, so he gave him a knowing nod, and they then began to chaff. They begged Claude’s pardon; the moment he wanted to keep the young person for his personal use, they would not ask him to lend her. Ha! ha! the scamp went hunting about for pretty models. And where had he picked up that one?
Sandoz hadn’t said anything. He was surprised at first but quickly smiled. He had a sharper insight than Dubuche, so he gave him a knowing nod, and they started to tease each other. They apologized to Claude; the moment he wanted to keep the young woman for himself, they wouldn’t ask to borrow her. Ha! ha! the rascal was off looking for pretty models. And where had he found that one?
More and more embarrassed by these remarks, Claude went on fidgetting. ‘What a couple of idiots you are!’ he exclaimed, ‘If you only knew what fools you are making of yourselves. That’ll do. You really make me sorry for both of you.’
More and more embarrassed by these comments, Claude kept fidgeting. ‘What a couple of idiots you are!’ he exclaimed, ‘If only you knew how foolish you’re making yourselves look. That’s enough. I truly feel sorry for both of you.’
His voice sounded so stern that they both became silent immediately, while he, after once more scratching out the woman’s head, drew it anew and began to paint it in, following his sketch of Christine, but with a feverish, unsteady touch which went at random.
His voice was so serious that they both fell silent right away, while he, after once more erasing the woman’s head, drew it again and started to paint it in, following his sketch of Christine, but with a frantic, shaky touch that seemed random.
‘Just give me another ten minutes, will you?’ he repeated. ‘I will rough in the shoulders to be ready for to-morrow, and then we’ll go down.’
‘Just give me another ten minutes, okay?’ he repeated. ‘I’ll shape the shoulders to be ready for tomorrow, and then we’ll head down.’
Sandoz and Dubuche, knowing that it was of no use to prevent him from killing himself in this fashion, resigned themselves to the inevitable. The latter lighted his pipe, and flung himself on the couch. He was the only one of the three who smoked; the others had never taken kindly to tobacco, always feeling qualmish after a cigar. And when Dubuche was stretched on his back, his eyes turned towards the clouds of smoke he raised, he began to talk about himself in an interminable monotonous fashion. Ah! that confounded Paris, how one had to work one’s fingers to the bone in order to get on. He recalled the fifteen months of apprenticeship he had spent with his master, the celebrated Dequersonnière, a former grand-prize man, now architect of the Civil Branch of Public Works, an officer of the Legion of Honour and a member of the Institute, whose chief architectural performance, the church of St. Mathieu, was a cross between a pastry-cook’s mould and a clock in the so-called First Empire style. A good sort of fellow, after all, was this Dequersonnière whom Dubuche chaffed, while inwardly sharing his reverence for the old classical formulas. However, but for his fellow-pupils, the young man would not have learnt much at the studio in the Rue du Four, for the master only paid a running visit to the place some three times a week. A set of ferocious brutes, were those comrades of his, who had made his life jolly hard in the beginning, but who, at least, had taught him how to prepare a surface, outline, and wash in a plan. And how often had he had to content himself with a cup of chocolate and a roll for déjeuner in order to pay the necessary five-and-twenty francs to the superintendent! And the sheets of paper he had laboriously smudged, and the hours he had spent in poring over books before he had dared to present himself at the School! And he had narrowly escaped being plucked in spite of all his assiduous endeavours. He lacked imagination, and the drawings he submitted, a caryatide and a summer dining-room, both extremely mediocre performances, had classed him at the bottom of the list. Fortunately, he had made up for this in his oral examination with his logarithms, geometry, and history of architecture, for he was very strong in the scientific parts. Now that he was attending the School as a second-class student, he had to toil and moil in order to secure a first-class diploma. It was a dog’s life, there was no end to it, said he.
Sandoz and Dubuche, realizing that it was pointless to stop him from ending his life this way, accepted what was coming. Dubuche lit his pipe and threw himself onto the couch. He was the only one of the three who smoked; the others had never liked tobacco, always feeling queasy after a cigar. As Dubuche lay on his back, looking at the clouds of smoke he was creating, he started talking about himself in a long, dull way. Ah! that annoying Paris, how you had to work like crazy just to get by. He remembered the fifteen months of apprenticeship he had gone through with his master, the famous Dequersonnière, a former grand-prize winner, now an architect in the Civil Branch of Public Works, an officer of the Legion of Honor, and a member of the Institute. His main work, the church of St. Mathieu, was a mix of a pastry chef's mold and a clock in the so-called First Empire style. Dequersonnière was actually a decent guy, even though Dubuche joked about him while secretly respecting the old classical styles. However, without his fellow students, the young man wouldn’t have learned much at the studio on Rue du Four, since their master only dropped by about three times a week. His classmates were a bunch of tough guys who had made his life pretty miserable at first, but at least they taught him how to prepare a surface, outline, and wash in a plan. So many times he had to settle for a cup of chocolate and a roll for lunch just to pay the necessary twenty-five francs to the superintendent! And the sheets of paper he had worked so hard on, and the hours he spent studying before he felt ready to even show up at the School! He had narrowly avoided failing despite all his hard work. He struggled with imagination, and the drawings he submitted, a caryatide and a summer dining room, were both pretty mediocre, putting him at the bottom of the list. Fortunately, he made up for that in his oral exams with his skills in logarithms, geometry, and architectural history, since he was really strong in the scientific areas. Now that he was attending the School as a second-class student, he had to grind away to earn a first-class diploma. It was a tough life, with no end in sight, he said.
He stretched his legs apart, high upon the cushions, and smoked vigorously and regularly.
He spread his legs wide, comfortably resting on the cushions, and smoked steadily and intensely.
‘What with their courses of perspective, of descriptive geometry, of stereotomy, of building, and of the history of art—ah! upon my word, they do make one blacken paper with notes. And every month there is a competitive examination in architecture, sometimes a simple sketch, at others a complete design. There’s no time for pleasure if a fellow wishes to pass his examinations and secure the necessary honourable mentions, especially if, besides all that, he has to find time to earn his bread. As for myself, it’s almost killing me.’
‘With their perspective courses, descriptive geometry, stereotomy, building, and art history—wow! They really make you fill up pages with notes. And every month there’s a competitive exam in architecture, sometimes just a simple sketch, other times a full design. There’s no time for fun if someone wants to pass their exams and get those important mentions, especially if they also have to find time to make a living. Personally, it’s almost killing me.’
One of the cushions having slipped upon the floor, he fished it up with his feet. ‘All the same, I’m lucky. There are so many of us scouring the town every day without getting the smallest job. The day before yesterday I discovered an architect who works for a large contractor. You can have no idea of such an ignoramus of an architect—a downright numskull, incapable even of tracing a plan. He gives me twenty-five sous an hour, and I set his houses straight for him. It came just in time, too, for my mother sent me word that she was quite cleared out. Poor mother, what a lot of money I have to refund her!’
One of the cushions slipped onto the floor, and he picked it up with his feet. “Still, I’m lucky. There are so many of us searching the town every day without getting a single job. The day before yesterday, I found an architect who works for a big contractor. You wouldn’t believe how clueless this architect is—a total fool, not even able to draw a plan. He pays me twenty-five sous an hour, and I fix his houses for him. It came just in time, too, because my mom messaged me that she’s totally broke. Poor mom, I owe her a lot of money!”
As Dubuche was evidently talking to himself, chewing the cud of his everyday thoughts—his constant thoughts of making a rapid fortune—Sandoz did not even trouble to listen to him. He had opened the little window, and seated himself on a level with the roof, for he felt oppressed by the heat in the studio. But all at once he interrupted the architect.
As Dubuche clearly spoke to himself, processing his usual thoughts—his ongoing obsession with getting rich quickly—Sandoz didn't even bother to pay attention to him. He opened the small window and took a seat on the roof since he felt overwhelmed by the heat in the studio. But suddenly, he interrupted the architect.
‘I say, are you coming to dinner on Thursday? All the other fellows will be there—Fagerolles, Mahoudeau, Jory, Gagnière.’
‘I say, are you coming to dinner on Thursday? All the other guys will be there—Fagerolles, Mahoudeau, Jory, Gagnière.’
Every Thursday, quite a band met at Sandoz’s: friends from Plassans and others met in Paris—revolutionaries to a man, and all animated by the same passionate love of art.
Every Thursday, a lively group gathered at Sandoz's: friends from Plassans and others from Paris—revolutionaries all, driven by the same passionate love for art.
‘Next Thursday? No, I think not,’ answered Dubuche.
‘Next Thursday? No, I don’t think so,’ replied Dubuche.
‘I am obliged to go to a dance at a family’s I know.’
‘I have to go to a dance at a family’s I know.’
‘Where you expect to get hold of a dowry, I suppose?’
‘Are you expecting to get a dowry, I guess?’
‘Well, it wouldn’t be such a bad spec.’
‘Well, it wouldn’t be such a bad deal.’
He shook the ashes from his pipe on to his left palm, and then, suddenly raising his voice—‘I almost forgot. I have had a letter from Pouillaud.’
He shook the ashes from his pipe into his left palm, and then, suddenly raising his voice—‘I almost forgot. I got a letter from Pouillaud.’
‘You, too!—well, I think he’s pretty well done for, Pouillaud. Another good fellow gone wrong.’
‘You too!—well, I think he’s pretty much finished, Pouillaud. Another good guy gone bad.’
‘Why gone wrong? He’ll succeed his father; he’ll spend his money quietly down there. He writes rationally enough. I always said he’d show us a thing or two, in spite of all his practical jokes. Ah! that beast of a Pouillaud.’
‘Why has it gone wrong? He’ll take over from his father; he’ll spend his money quietly down there. He writes sensibly enough. I always said he’d surprise us, despite all his practical jokes. Ah! that jerk Pouillaud.’
Sandoz, furious, was about to reply, when a despairing oath from Claude stopped him. The latter had not opened his lips since he had so obstinately resumed his work. To all appearance he had not even listened.
Sandoz, furious, was about to respond when a desperate curse from Claude interrupted him. Claude hadn’t said a word since he stubbornly went back to work. It seemed like he hadn't even been paying attention.
‘Curse it—I have failed again. Decidedly, I’m a brute, I shall never do anything.’ And in a fit of mad rage he wanted to rush at his picture and dash his fist through it. His friends had to hold him back. Why, it was simply childish to get into such a passion. Would matters be improved when, to his mortal regret, he had destroyed his work? Still shaking, he relapsed into silence, and stared at the canvas with an ardent fixed gaze that blazed with all the horrible agony born of his powerlessness. He could no longer produce anything clear or life-like; the woman’s breast was growing pasty with heavy colouring; that flesh which, in his fancy, ought to have glowed, was simply becoming grimy; he could not even succeed in getting a correct focus. What on earth was the matter with his brain that he heard it bursting asunder, as it were, amidst his vain efforts? Was he losing his sight that he was no longer able to see correctly? Were his hands no longer his own that they refused to obey him? And thus he went on winding himself up, irritated by the strange hereditary lesion which sometimes so greatly assisted his creative powers, but at others reduced him to a state of sterile despair, such as to make him forget the first elements of drawing. Ah, to feel giddy with vertiginous nausea, and yet to remain there full of a furious passion to create, when the power to do so fled with everything else, when everything seemed to founder around him—the pride of work, the dreamt-of glory, the whole of his existence!
‘Damn it—I’ve failed again. Clearly, I’m a jerk; I’ll never accomplish anything.’ And in a fit of rage, he wanted to charge at his painting and smash his fist through it. His friends had to hold him back. It was ridiculous to get so worked up. Would things really get better if, to his eternal regret, he destroyed his work? Still trembling, he fell silent and stared at the canvas with a burning, intent gaze filled with the horrible agony of his powerlessness. He could no longer create anything clear or lifelike; the woman’s breast was turning dull from heavy paint; the flesh that, in his imagination, should have radiated warmth was just becoming grimy; he couldn’t even get the focus right. What on earth was wrong with his mind that he felt it threatening to explode amid his fruitless efforts? Was he losing his sight that he could no longer see properly? Were his hands not his own anymore, refusing to listen to him? And so he continued to spiral, irritated by the strange hereditary condition that sometimes enhanced his creativity but at other times plunged him into a state of sheer despair, making him forget the basics of drawing. Ah, to feel dizzy with overwhelming nausea, yet remain there fueled by a furious drive to create, when the ability to do so slipped away along with everything else, when everything seemed to fall apart around him—the pride in his work, the glory he dreamed of, his entire existence!
‘Look here, old boy,’ said Sandoz at last, ‘we don’t want to worry you, but it’s half-past six, and we are starving. Be reasonable, and come down with us.’
‘Hey, man,’ Sandoz finally said, ‘we don’t want to stress you out, but it’s half-past six, and we’re really hungry. Please be reasonable and come down with us.’
Claude was cleaning a corner of his palette. Then he emptied some more tubes on it, and, in a voice like thunder, replied with one single word, ‘No.’
Claude was cleaning a corner of his palette. Then he squeezed out some more tubes onto it and, with a voice like thunder, answered with just one word, ‘No.’
For the next ten minutes nobody spoke; the painter, beside himself, wrestled with his picture, whilst his friends remained anxious at this attack, which they did not know how to allay. Then, as there came a knock at the door, the architect went to open it.
For the next ten minutes, no one said a word; the painter, overwhelmed, struggled with his painting, while his friends anxiously dealt with the situation, not knowing how to calm him down. Then, when there was a knock at the door, the architect went to open it.
‘Hallo, it’s Papa Malgras.’
"Hey, it’s Papa Malgras."
Malgras, the picture-dealer, was a thick-set individual, with close-cropped, brush-like, white hair, and a red splotchy face. He was wrapped in a very dirty old green coat, that made him look like an untidy cabman. In a husky voice, he exclaimed: ‘I happened to pass along the quay, on the other side of the way, and I saw that gentleman at the window. So I came up.’
Malgras, the art dealer, was a stocky guy with short, brushy white hair and a splotchy red face. He was dressed in a really dirty old green coat that made him look like a disheveled cab driver. In a raspy voice, he said, “I happened to walk along the quay on the other side and saw that guy at the window. So I came over.”
Claude’s continued silence made him pause. The painter had turned to his picture again with an impatient gesture. Not that this silence in any way embarrassed the new comer, who, standing erect on his sturdy legs and feeling quite at home, carefully examined the new picture with his bloodshot eyes. Without any ceremony, he passed judgment upon it in one phrase—half ironic, half affectionate: ‘Well, well, there’s a machine.’
Claude’s ongoing silence made him stop for a moment. The painter turned back to his painting with an impatient motion. This silence didn't bother the newcomer, who stood tall on his strong legs and felt right at home as he closely examined the new painting with his bloodshot eyes. Without any formalities, he declared his opinion in one phrase—half ironic, half affectionate: ‘Well, well, there’s a machine.’
Then, seeing that nobody said anything, he began to stroll round the studio, looking at the paintings on the walls.
Then, noticing that no one spoke up, he started to walk around the studio, examining the paintings on the walls.
Papa Malgras, beneath his thick layer of grease and grime, was really a very cute customer, with taste and scent for good painting. He never wasted his time or lost his way among mere daubers; he went straight, as if from instinct, to individualists, whose talent was contested still, but whose future fame his flaming, drunkard’s nose sniffed from afar. Added to this he was a ferocious hand at bargaining, and displayed all the cunning of a savage in his efforts to secure, for a song, the pictures that he coveted. True, he himself was satisfied with very honest profits, twenty per cent., thirty at the most. He based his calculations on quickly turning over his small capital, never purchasing in the morning without knowing where to dispose of his purchase at night. As a superb liar, moreover, he had no equal.
Papa Malgras, under his thick layer of grease and dirt, was actually a pretty charming guy with a good eye for quality painting. He never wasted his time or got sidetracked by mediocre artists; he went straight, almost instinctively, to the individualists, whose talent was still debated but whose future success he could sense from far away with his keen, tipsy nose. On top of that, he was a fierce negotiator, showing all the cleverness of a wild man in his attempts to snag the artworks he wanted for a bargain. True, he was happy with fairly honest profits, maybe twenty percent, thirty at the most. He based his business on quickly flipping his small investment, never buying in the morning without already knowing where he would sell his purchase by night. Plus, he was an incredible liar, unmatched by anyone.
Pausing near the door, before the studies from the nude, painted at the Boutin studio, he contemplated them in silence for a few moments, his eyes glistening the while with the enjoyment of a connoisseur, which his heavy eyelids tried to hide. Assuredly, he thought, there was a great deal of talent and sentiment of life about that big crazy fellow Claude, who wasted his time in painting huge stretches of canvas which no one would buy. The girl’s pretty legs, the admirably painted woman’s trunk, filled the dealer with delight. But there was no sale for that kind of stuff, and he had already made his choice—a tiny sketch, a nook of the country round Plassans, at once delicate and violent—which he pretended not to notice. At last he drew near, and said, in an off-hand way:
Pausing near the door, in front of the studies from the nude, painted at the Boutin studio, he watched them in silence for a few moments, his eyes sparkling with the pleasure of a connoisseur that his heavy eyelids tried to conceal. Surely, he thought, there was a lot of talent and a sense of life in that big, eccentric guy Claude, who wasted his time on painting huge canvases that no one would buy. The girl’s pretty legs and the beautifully painted woman’s torso thrilled the dealer. But there was no market for that kind of art, and he had already made up his mind—a small sketch of a corner of the countryside around Plassans, both delicate and intense—which he pretended not to see. Finally, he stepped closer and said nonchalantly:
‘What’s this? Ah! yes, I know, one of the things you brought back with you from the South. It’s too crude. I still have the two I bought of you.’
‘What’s this? Ah! yes, I know, one of the things you brought back with you from the South. It’s too rough. I still have the two I bought from you.’
And he went on in mellow, long-winded phrases. ‘You’ll perhaps not believe me, Monsieur Lantier, but that sort of thing doesn’t sell at all—not at all. I’ve a set of rooms full of them. I’m always afraid of smashing something when I turn round. I can’t go on like that, honour bright; I shall have to go into liquidation, and I shall end my days in the hospital. You know me, eh? my heart is bigger than my pocket, and there’s nothing I like better than to oblige young men of talent like yourself. Oh, for the matter of that, you’ve got talent, and I keep on telling them so—nay, shouting it to them—but what’s the good? They won’t nibble, they won’t nibble!’
And he continued in a smooth, lengthy manner. “You might not believe me, Monsieur Lantier, but that kind of thing doesn’t sell at all—not at all. I have a whole set of rooms filled with them. I’m always worried about breaking something when I turn around. I can’t keep going like this, honestly; I’ll have to declare bankruptcy, and I’ll end up in the hospital. You know me, right? My heart is bigger than my wallet, and I love helping talented young men like you. Oh, by the way, you do have talent, and I keep telling them this—no, I’m shouting it to them—but what’s the point? They won’t take a bite, they won’t take a bite!”
He was trying the emotional dodge; then, with the spirit of a man about to do something rash: ‘Well, it sha’n’t be said that I came in to waste your time. What do you want for that rough sketch?’
He was trying to avoid the emotional part; then, with the attitude of someone about to make a reckless move: ‘Well, I won’t let it be said that I came in to waste your time. What do you want for that rough sketch?’
Claude, still irritated, was painting nervously. He dryly answered, without even turning his head: ‘Twenty francs.’
Claude, still annoyed, was painting anxiously. He replied tersely, without even looking up: ‘Twenty francs.’
‘Nonsense; twenty francs! you must be mad. You sold me the others ten francs a-piece—and to-day I won’t give a copper more than eight francs.’
‘Nonsense; twenty francs! You must be crazy. You sold me the others for ten francs each— and today I won’t pay a cent more than eight francs.’
As a rule the painter closed with him at once, ashamed and humbled at this miserable chaffering, glad also to get a little money now and then. But this time he was obstinate, and took to insulting the picture-dealer, who, giving tit for tat, all at once dropped the formal ‘you’ to assume the glib ‘thou,’ denied his talent, overwhelmed him with invective, and taxed him with ingratitude. Meanwhile, however, he had taken from his pocket three successive five-franc pieces, which, as if playing at chuck-farthing, he flung from a distance upon the table, where they rattled among the crockery.
Typically, the painter would agree quickly, feeling ashamed and humbled by the pathetic bargaining, and was also happy to earn a bit of money now and then. But this time, he was stubborn and began insulting the picture dealer, who, in response, dropped the formal ‘you’ and switched to the casual ‘thou,’ dismissed his talent, bombarded him with insults, and accused him of being ungrateful. In the meantime, he pulled three five-franc coins from his pocket, which he tossed onto the table from a distance, where they clinked among the dishes.
‘One, two, three—not one more, dost hear? for there is already one too many, and I’ll take care to get it back; I’ll deduct it from something else of thine, as I live. Fifteen francs for that! Thou art wrong, my lad, and thou’lt be sorry for this dirty trick.’
‘One, two, three—not one more, do you hear? Because there’s already one too many, and I’ll make sure to get it back; I’ll take it out of something else of yours, I swear. Fifteen francs for that! You’re mistaken, my friend, and you’ll regret this shady move.’
Quite exhausted, Claude let him take down the little canvas, which disappeared as if by magic in his capacious green coat. Had it dropped into a special pocket, or was it reposing on Papa Malgras’ ample chest? Not the slightest protuberance indicated its whereabouts.
Quite exhausted, Claude let him take down the small canvas, which seemed to vanish into his large green coat. Did it fall into a hidden pocket, or was it resting on Papa Malgras' broad chest? Not a single bulge showed where it might be.
Having accomplished his stroke of business, Papa Malgras abruptly calmed down and went towards the door. But he suddenly changed his mind and came back. ‘Just listen, Lantier,’ he said, in the honeyest of tones; ‘I want a lobster painted. You really owe me that much after fleecing me. I’ll bring you the lobster, you’ll paint me a bit of still life from it, and keep it for your pains. You can eat it with your friends. It’s settled, isn’t it?’
Having wrapped up his business, Papa Malgras suddenly relaxed and headed for the door. But then he changed his mind and came back. ‘Just listen, Lantier,’ he said, in the sweetest tone; ‘I want a lobster painted. You really owe me that much after taking advantage of me. I’ll bring you the lobster, you’ll paint me a still life from it, and keep it for your trouble. You can share it with your friends. It’s a deal, right?’
At this proposal Sandoz and Dubuche, who had hitherto listened inquisitively, burst into such loud laughter that the picture-dealer himself became gay. Those confounded painters, they did themselves no good, they simply starved. What would have become of the lazy beggars if he, Papa Malgras, hadn’t brought a leg of mutton now and then, or a nice fresh plaice, or a lobster, with its garnish of parsley?
At this suggestion, Sandoz and Dubuche, who had been listening with interest, burst into such loud laughter that the picture dealer himself started to feel cheerful. Those hopeless painters were doing nothing for themselves; they were just starving. What would have happened to those lazy bums if he, Papa Malgras, hadn’t occasionally brought them a leg of mutton, a fresh plaice, or a lobster with parsley on the side?
‘You’ll paint me my lobster, eh, Lantier? Much obliged.’ And he stationed himself anew before the large canvas, with his wonted smile of mingled derision and admiration. And at last he went off, repeating, ‘Well, well, there’s a machine.’
‘You’ll paint me my lobster, right, Lantier? Thanks a lot.’ And he positioned himself again in front of the large canvas, wearing his usual smile of mixed mockery and admiration. And finally, he walked away, repeating, ‘Well, well, that’s something.’
Claude wanted to take up his palette and brushes once more. But his legs refused their service; his arms fell to his side, stiff, as if pinioned there by some occult force. In the intense melancholy silence that had followed the din of the dispute he staggered, distracted, bereft of sight before his shapeless work.
Claude wanted to pick up his palette and brushes again. But his legs wouldn’t cooperate; his arms hung limply at his sides, stiff as if held down by some mysterious force. In the heavy silence that followed the noise of the argument, he stumbled, confused and blind before his formless creation.
‘I’m done for, I’m done for,’ he gasped. ‘That brute has finished me off!’
‘I’m finished, I’m finished,’ he gasped. ‘That monster has taken me out!’
The clock had just struck seven; he had been at work for eight mortal hours without tasting anything but a crust of bread, without taking a moment’s rest, ever on his legs, shaken by feverish excitement. And now the sun was setting, shadows began to darken the studio, which in the gloaming assumed a most melancholy aspect. When the light went down like this on the crisis of a bad day’s work, it seemed to Claude as if the sun would never rise again, but had for ever carried life and all the jubilant gaiety of colour away.
The clock had just struck seven; he had been working for eight grueling hours without eating anything but a piece of bread, without taking a moment’s break, always on his feet, overwhelmed with anxious energy. Now the sun was setting, shadows started to fill the studio, which took on a really sad look in the dim light. When the light faded like this at the end of a frustrating day, it felt to Claude as if the sun would never rise again and had taken away all the life and bright joy of color forever.
‘Come,’ implored Sandoz, with all the gentleness of brotherly compassion. ‘Come, there’s a good fellow.’
‘Come,’ pleaded Sandoz, with all the kindness of brotherly compassion. ‘Come on, be a good guy.’
Even Dubuche added, ‘You’ll see more clearly into it to-morrow. Come and dine.’
Even Dubuche added, “You’ll understand it better tomorrow. Come and have dinner.”
For a moment Claude refused to surrender. He stood rooted to the spot, deaf to their friendly voices, and fiercely obstinate.
For a moment, Claude wouldn't give in. He stood frozen in place, ignoring their friendly voices and being stubborn.
What did he want to do then, since his tired fingers were no longer able to grasp the brush? He did not know, but, however powerless he might be, he was gnawed by a mad craving to go on working still and to create in spite of everything. Even if he did nothing, he would at least stay there, he would not vacate the spot. All at once, however, he made up his mind, shaken the while as by a big sob. He clutched firmly hold of his broadest palette-knife, and, with one deep, slow sweep, he obliterated the woman’s head and bosom. It was veritable murder, a pounding away of human flesh; the whole disappeared in a murky, muddy mash. By the side of the gentleman in the dark jacket, amidst the bright verdure, where the two little wrestlers so lightly tinted were disporting themselves, there remained naught of the nude, headless, breastless woman but a mutilated trunk, a vague cadaverous stump, an indistinct, lifeless patch of visionary flesh.
What did he want to do then, since his tired fingers could no longer hold the brush? He didn’t know, but despite feeling powerless, he was driven by a desperate urge to keep working and to create no matter what. Even if he did nothing else, he would at least stay there; he wouldn’t leave the spot. Suddenly, though, he made up his mind, shaking as if he was about to cry. He firmly grabbed his largest palette knife and, with one deep, slow stroke, he erased the woman's head and chest. It felt like real destruction, like he was smashing human flesh; it all vanished into a murky, muddy mix. Next to the man in the dark jacket, amidst the bright greenery where the two little wrestlers were playfully colored, there was nothing left of the nude, headless, breastless woman except for a mutilated torso, a vague lifeless stump, an indistinct patch of imagined flesh.
Sandoz and Dubuche were already descending the stairs with a great clatter, and Claude followed them, fleeing his work, in agony at having to leave it thus scarred with a gaping gash.
Sandoz and Dubuche were already stomping down the stairs, and Claude trailed behind them, escaping his work, tormented by having to leave it so marred with a deep cut.
III
THE beginning of the week proved disastrous to Claude. He had relapsed into one of those periods of self-doubt that made him hate painting, with the hatred of a lover betrayed, who overwhelms the faithless one with insults although tortured by an uncontrollable desire to worship her yet again. So on the Thursday, after three frightful days of fruitless and solitary battling, he left home as early as eight in the morning, banging his door violently, and feeling so disgusted with himself that he swore he would never take up a brush again. When he was unhinged by one of these attacks there was but one remedy, he had to forget himself, and, to do so, it was needful that he should look up some comrades with whom to quarrel, and, above all, walk about and trudge across Paris, until the heat and odour of battle rising from her paving-stones put heart into him again.
THE beginning of the week was a disaster for Claude. He fell back into one of those phases of self-doubt that made him hate painting, like a betrayed lover who showers the unfaithful one with insults while still feeling an uncontrollable urge to worship her again. So on Thursday, after three awful days of struggling alone and getting nowhere, he left home at eight in the morning, slamming his door hard, feeling so disgusted with himself that he swore he would never pick up a brush again. When he was thrown off balance by these episodes, there was only one cure: he needed to forget himself, and to do that, he had to find some friends to argue with and, above all, walk around and trek across Paris until the heat and smell of conflict rising from its streets lifted his spirits again.
That day, like every other Thursday, he was to dine at Sandoz’s, in company with their friends. But what was he to do until the evening? The idea of remaining by himself, of eating his heart out, disgusted him. He would have gone straight to his friend, only he knew that the latter must be at his office. Then the thought of Dubuche occurred to him, but he hesitated, for their old friendship had lately been cooling down. He felt that the fraternity of the earlier times of effort no longer existed between them. He guessed that Dubuche lacked intelligence, had become covertly hostile, and was occupied with ambitions different from his own. However, he, Claude, must go somewhere. So he made up his mind, and repaired to the Rue Jacob, where the architect rented a small room on the sixth floor of a big frigid-looking house.
That day, like every other Thursday, he was supposed to have dinner at Sandoz’s with their friends. But what was he going to do until the evening? The thought of staying by himself, feeling sorry for himself, disgusted him. He would’ve gone straight to his friend, but he knew he would be at his office. Then he thought about Dubuche, but he hesitated because their old friendship had been fading. He sensed that the camaraderie they once had during their earlier struggles was no longer there. He believed that Dubuche lacked intelligence, had become secretly resentful, and was focused on ambitions that were different from his own. Still, Claude had to go somewhere. So he made up his mind and headed to Rue Jacob, where the architect rented a small room on the sixth floor of a big, unwelcoming building.
Claude was already on the landing of the second floor, when the doorkeeper, calling him back, snappishly told him that M. Dubuche was not at home, and had, in fact, stayed out all night. The young man slowly descended the stairs and found himself in the street, stupefied, as it were, by so prodigious an event as an escapade on the part of Dubuche. It was a piece of inconceivable bad luck. For a moment he strolled along aimlessly; but, as he paused at the corner of the Rue de Seine, not knowing which way to go, he suddenly recollected what his friend had told him about a certain night spent at the Dequersonnière studio—a night of terrible hard work, the eve of the day on which the pupils’ designs had to be deposited at the School of Arts. At once he walked towards the Rue du Four, where the studio was situated. Hitherto he had carefully abstained from calling there for Dubuche, from fear of the yells with which outsiders were greeted. But now he made straight for the place without flinching, his timidity disappearing so thoroughly before the anguish of loneliness that he felt ready to undergo any amount of insult could he but secure a companion in misfortune.
Claude was already on the second-floor landing when the doorkeeper, calling him back, rudely told him that M. Dubuche wasn’t home and had actually been out all night. The young man slowly walked down the stairs and found himself on the street, stunned by Dubuche's wild behavior. It felt like incredibly bad luck. For a moment, he wandered aimlessly; but when he stopped at the corner of Rue de Seine, not knowing where to go, he suddenly remembered what his friend had said about a particular night at the Dequersonnière studio—a night of intense work right before the pupils had to submit their designs to the School of Arts. He immediately headed toward Rue du Four, where the studio was located. Until now, he had intentionally avoided going there to find Dubuche, fearing the loud shouts that outsiders received. But now he headed straight for the place without hesitation, his shyness completely overshadowed by the loneliness he felt, willing to face any insults if it meant finding a companion in his misfortune.
The studio was situated in the narrowest part of the Rue du Four, at the far end of a decrepit, tumble-down building. Claude had to cross two evil-smelling courtyards to reach a third, across which ran a sort of big closed shed, a huge out-house of board and plaster work, which had once served as a packing-case maker’s workshop. From outside, through the four large windows, whose panes were daubed with a coating of white lead, nothing could be seen but the bare whitewashed ceiling.
The studio was located in the narrowest section of Rue du Four, at the end of a rundown, crumbling building. Claude had to walk through two stinky courtyards to get to a third one, across which stretched a large closed shed, a massive outbuilding made of wood and plaster that used to be a packing-case maker’s workshop. From the outside, through the four large windows, which were smeared with a layer of white lead, all that could be seen was the plain whitewashed ceiling.
Having pushed the door open, Claude remained motionless on the threshold. The place stretched out before him, with its four long tables ranged lengthwise to the windows—broad double tables they were, which had swarms of students on either side, and were littered with moist sponges, paint saucers, iron candlesticks, water bowls, and wooden boxes, in which each pupil kept his white linen blouse, his compasses, and colours. In one corner, the stove, neglected since the previous winter, stood rusting by the side of a pile of coke that had not been swept away; while at the other end a large iron cistern with a tap was suspended between two towels. And amidst the bare untidiness of this shed, the eye was especially attracted by the walls which, above, displayed a litter of plaster casts ranged in haphazard fashion on shelves, and disappeared lower down behind forests of T-squares and bevels, and piles of drawing boards, tied together with webbing straps. Bit by bit, such parts of the partitions as had remained unoccupied had become covered with inscriptions and drawings, a constantly rising flotsam and jetsam of scrawls traced there as on the margin of an ever-open book. There were caricatures of the students themselves, coarse witticisms fit to make a gendarme turn pale, epigrammatic sentences, addition sums, addresses, and so forth; while, above all else, written in big letters, and occupying the most prominent place, appeared this inscription: ‘On the 7th of June, Gorfu declared that he didn’t care a hang for Rome.—Signed, Godemard.‘*
Having pushed the door open, Claude stood still in the doorway. The room stretched out in front of him, featuring four long tables lined up along the windows—wide double tables that were packed with students on either side, covered with damp sponges, paint containers, metal candlesticks, water bowls, and wooden boxes where each student kept their white linen smock, compass, and paints. In one corner, the neglected stove from the previous winter sat rusting next to an uncleaned pile of coal; while at the other end, a large metal tank with a tap hung between two towels. Amidst the bare messiness of this space, what stood out particularly were the walls, which, at the top, displayed a chaotic assortment of plaster casts on shelves, fading down below into a jungle of T-squares and bevels, along with heaps of drawing boards tied together with webbing straps. Gradually, the areas of the walls that weren’t occupied became covered with writings and sketches, a constantly growing collection of doodles scrawled as if on the margins of a book that was always open. There were caricatures of the students themselves, crude jokes that could make a police officer blush, witty phrases, math problems, addresses, and so on; but above all else, in large letters and taking center stage, was this inscription: ‘On the 7th of June, Gorfu declared that he didn’t care at all about Rome.—Signed, Godemard.’*
* The allusion is to the French Art School at Rome, and the competitions into which students enter to obtain admission to it, or to secure the prizes offered for the best exhibits which, during their term of residence, they send to Paris.—ED.
* The reference is to the French Art School in Rome and the competitions that students participate in to gain admission or win the prizes offered for the best works they send to Paris during their time there.—ED.
Claude was greeted with a growl like that of wild beasts disturbed in their lair. What kept him motionless was the strange aspect of this place on the morning of the ‘truck night,’ as the embryo architects termed the crucial night of labour. Since the previous evening, the whole studio, some sixty pupils, had been shut up there; those who had no designs to exhibit—‘the niggers,’ as they were called remaining to help the others, the competitors who, being behind time, had to knock off the work of a week in a dozen hours. Already, at midnight, they had stuffed themselves with brawn, saveloys, and similar viands, washed down with cheap wine. Towards one o’clock they had secured the company of some ‘ladies’; and, without the work abating, the feast had turned into a Roman orgy, blended with a smoking competition. On the damp, stained floor there remained a great litter of greasy paper and broken bottles; while the atmosphere reeked of burnt tallow, musk, highly seasoned sausages, and cheap bluish wine.
Claude was met with a growl like that of wild animals disturbed in their den. What kept him frozen was the odd vibe of this place on the morning of the 'truck night,' as the budding architects called the critical night of labor. Since the previous evening, the entire studio, about sixty students, had been locked in; those without designs to showcase—'the helpers,' as they were called—stayed to assist the others, the competitors who, being behind schedule, had to finish a week’s worth of work in just a dozen hours. By midnight, they had stuffed themselves with cold cuts, sausages, and similar foods, washed down with cheap wine. Around one o’clock, they had brought in some 'ladies'; and, without slowing down, the celebration turned into a Roman orgy mixed with a smoking contest. On the damp, stained floor, there was a huge mess of greasy paper and broken bottles, while the air was filled with the smell of burnt tallow, musk, heavily spiced sausages, and cheap bluish wine.
And now many voices savagely yelled: ‘Turn him out. Oh, that mug! What does he want, that guy? Turn him out, turn him out.’
And now many voices shouted wildly: ‘Get him out. Oh, that face! What does he want, that guy? Get him out, get him out.’
For a moment Claude, quite dazed, staggered beneath the violence of the onslaught. But the epithets became viler, for the acme of elegance, even for the more refined among these young fellows, was to rival one’s friends in beastly language. He was, nevertheless, recovering and beginning to answer, when Dubuche recognised him. The latter turned crimson, for he detested that kind of adventure. He felt ashamed of his friend, and rushed towards him, amidst the jeers, which were now levelled at himself:
For a moment, Claude, feeling a bit stunned, staggered under the intensity of the attack. But the insults grew even harsher, as the peak of sophistication, even for the more polished of these young men, seemed to be outdoing each other with crude language. Nonetheless, he was starting to regain his composure and was about to respond when Dubuche spotted him. Dubuche flushed with embarrassment, as he hated that kind of situation. He felt ashamed of his friend and hurried over to him, amidst the taunts that were now directed at him.
‘What, is it you?’ he gasped. ‘I told you never to come in. Just wait for me a minute in the yard.’
‘What, is that you?’ he gasped. ‘I told you never to come in. Just wait for me for a minute in the yard.’
At that moment, Claude, who was stepping back, narrowly escaped being knocked down by a little hand-truck which two big full-bearded fellows brought up at a gallop. It was from this truck that the night of heavy toil derived its name: and for the last week the students who had got behindhand with their work, through taking up petty paid jobs outside, had been repeating the cry, ‘Oh! I’m in the truck and no mistake.’ The moment the vehicle appeared, a clamour arose. It was a quarter to nine o’clock, there was barely time to reach the School of Arts. However, a helter-skelter rush emptied the studio; each brought out his chases, amidst a general jostling; those who obstinately wished to give their designs a last finishing touch were knocked about and carried away with their comrades. In less than five minutes every frame was piled upon the truck, and the two bearded fellows, the most recent additions to the studio, harnessed themselves to it like cattle and drew it along with all their strength, the others vociferating, and pushing from behind. It was like the rush of a sluice; the three courtyards were crossed amidst a torrential crash, and the street was invaded, flooded by the howling throng.
At that moment, Claude, who was stepping back, barely avoided being knocked down by a small hand truck that two big, bearded guys were rushing up with. It was from this truck that the night of hard work got its nickname: and for the past week, the students who had fallen behind on their assignments because they were doing small paid jobs outside had been repeating the phrase, ‘Oh! I’m in the truck, no doubt about it.’ As soon as the vehicle showed up, a loud commotion started. It was a quarter to nine, and there was hardly any time left to get to the School of Arts. Nonetheless, a chaotic rush emptied the studio; everyone brought out their chases amidst a general shoving; those who stubbornly wanted to add a final touch to their designs were pushed around and swept away with their friends. Within five minutes, every frame was stacked onto the truck, and the two bearded guys, the newest members of the studio, hitched themselves to it like oxen and pulled it with all their might, while the others shouted and pushed from behind. It was like a floodgate opening; the three courtyards were crossed in a loud crash, and the street was overrun, swamped by the screaming crowd.
Claude, nevertheless, had set up running by the side of Dubuche, who came at the fag-end, very vexed at not having had another quarter of an hour to finish a tinted drawing more carefully.
Claude, however, had started jogging alongside Dubuche, who arrived at the very end, quite frustrated that he didn't have another fifteen minutes to finish a colored drawing more carefully.
‘What are you going to do afterwards?’ asked Claude.
'What are you going to do next?' asked Claude.
‘Oh! I’ve errands which will take up my whole day.’
‘Oh! I have errands that will take up my whole day.’
The painter was grieved to see that even this friend escaped him. ‘All right, then,’ said he; ‘in that case I leave you. Shall we see you at Sandoz’s to-night?’
The painter was saddened to see that even this friend had gotten away from him. ‘Fine, then,’ he said; ‘in that case, I’ll take my leave. Will we see you at Sandoz’s tonight?’
‘Yes, I think so; unless I’m kept to dinner elsewhere.’
'Yeah, I think so; unless I get invited to dinner somewhere else.'
Both were getting out of breath. The band of embryo architects, without slackening their pace, had purposely taken the longest way round for the pleasure of prolonging their uproar. After rushing down the Rue du Four, they dashed across the Place Gozlin and swept into the Rue de l’Echaude. Heading the procession was the truck, drawn and pushed along more and more vigorously, and constantly rebounding over the rough paving-stones, amid the jolting of the frames with which it was laden. Its escort galloped along madly, compelling the passers-by to draw back close to the houses in order to save themselves from being knocked down; while the shop-keepers, standing open-mouthed on their doorsteps, believed in a revolution. The whole neighbourhood seemed topsy-turvy. In the Rue Jacob, such was the rush, so frightful were the yells, that several house shutters were hastily closed. As the Rue Bonaparte was, at last, being reached, one tall, fair fellow thought it a good joke to catch hold of a little servant girl who stood bewildered on the pavement, and drag her along with them, like a wisp of straw caught in a torrent.
Both were out of breath. The group of aspiring architects, without slowing down, had intentionally taken the longest route just to stretch out the chaos. After racing down Rue du Four, they dashed across Place Gozlin and swept into Rue de l’Echaude. Leading the pack was the truck, pushed and pulled faster and faster, constantly bouncing over the uneven cobblestones, jostling the frames it carried. Its crew raced alongside, forcing pedestrians to jump back against the buildings to avoid being knocked over, while shopkeepers gaped from their doorways, convinced a revolution was happening. The entire neighborhood felt turned upside down. In Rue Jacob, the frenzy was so intense, and the screams so terrifying, that several shutters slammed shut. As they finally approached Rue Bonaparte, one tall, fair guy thought it would be funny to grab a little girl servant standing dazed on the sidewalk and pull her along with them, like a piece of straw caught in a current.
‘Well,’ said Claude, ‘good-bye, then; I’ll see you to-night.’
‘Well,’ said Claude, ‘goodbye, then; I’ll see you tonight.’
‘Yes, to-night.’
‘Yes, tonight.’
The painter, out of breath, had stopped at the corner of the Rue des Beaux Arts. The court gates of the Art School stood wide open in front of him, and the procession plunged into the yard.
The painter, panting, had stopped at the corner of Rue des Beaux Arts. The gates of the Art School were wide open in front of him, and the procession moved into the yard.
After drawing breath, Claude retraced his steps to the Rue de Seine. His bad luck was increasing; it seemed ordained that he should not be able to beguile a chum from work that morning. So he went up the street, and slowly walked on as far as the Place du Pantheon, without any definite aim. Then it occurred to him that he might just look into the Municipal Offices, if only to shake hands with Sandoz. That would, at any rate, mean ten minutes well spent. But he positively gasped when he was told by an attendant that M. Sandoz had asked for a day off to attend a funeral. However, he knew the trick of old. His friend always found the same pretext whenever he wanted to do a good day’s work at home. He had already made up his mind to join him there, when a feeling of artistic brotherliness, the scruple of an honest worker, made him pause; yes, it would be a crime to go and disturb that good fellow, and infect him with the discouragement born of a difficult task, at the very moment when he was, no doubt, manfully accomplishing his own work.
After taking a breath, Claude went back to Rue de Seine. His bad luck was piling up; it seemed like fate was against him, making it impossible to pull a friend away from work that morning. So he walked up the street, aimlessly moving towards Place du Pantheon. Then it dawned on him that he could check in at the Municipal Offices, if only to say hi to Sandoz. That would at least be ten minutes well spent. But he was shocked when an attendant told him that M. Sandoz had taken the day off to go to a funeral. However, he was familiar with his friend's usual excuse. Sandoz always used that same reason whenever he wanted to catch up on work at home. He had almost decided to join him there when a sense of artistic camaraderie, the scruple of a hardworking individual, made him hesitate; yes, it would be wrong to barge in on that good guy and bring him down with the discouragement from a tough task, especially when he was likely focused on doing his own work.
So Claude had to resign himself to his fate. He dragged his black melancholy along the quays until mid-day, his head so heavy, so full of thoughts of his lack of power, that he only espied the well-loved horizons of the Seine through a mist. Then he found himself once more in the Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête, where he breakfasted at Gomard’s wine shop, whose sign ‘The Dog of Montargis,’ inspired him with interest. Some stonemasons, in their working blouses, bespattered with mortar, were there at table, and, like them, and with them, he ate his eight sous’ ‘ordinary’—some beef broth in a bowl, in which he soaked some bread, followed by a slice of boiled soup-beef, garnished with haricot beans, and served up on a plate damp with dish-water. However, it was still too good, he thought, for a brute unable to earn his bread. Whenever his work miscarried, he undervalued himself, ranked himself lower than a common labourer, whose sinewy arms could at least perform their appointed task. For an hour he lingered in the tavern brutifying himself by listening to the conversation at the tables around him. Once outside he slowly resumed his walk in haphazard fashion.
So Claude had to accept his fate. He dragged his gloomy mood along the docks until midday, his head so heavy and filled with thoughts of his powerlessness that he could only see the beloved horizons of the Seine through a haze. Then he found himself once again on Rue de la Femme-sans-Tête, where he had breakfast at Gomard’s wine shop, whose sign, ‘The Dog of Montargis,’ piqued his interest. Some stonemasons, in their work clothes splattered with mortar, were sitting at a table, and he joined them, eating his eight-sous ‘ordinary’—a bowl of beef broth where he soaked some bread, followed by a slice of boiled beef served with haricot beans on a plate that was still wet from the dishwater. However, he thought it was still too good for someone who couldn’t earn a living. Whenever his work went wrong, he undervalued himself, considering himself lower than a common laborer, whose strong arms could at least do their job. He lingered in the tavern for an hour, dulling himself by listening to the conversations at the tables around him. Once outside, he slowly resumed his walk, wandering aimlessly.
When he got to the Place de l’Hôtel de Ville, however, a fresh idea made him quicken his pace. Why had he not thought of Fagerolles? Fagerolles was a nice fellow, gay, and by no means a fool, although he studied at the School of Arts. One could talk with him, even when he defended bad painting. If he had lunched at his father’s, in the Rue Vieille-du-Temple, he must certainly still be there.
When he arrived at the Place de l’Hôtel de Ville, a new idea popped into his head, making him walk faster. Why hadn’t he thought of Fagerolles? Fagerolles was a great guy, cheerful, and definitely not stupid, even though he studied at the School of Arts. You could have a conversation with him, even when he was defending terrible artwork. If he had lunch at his dad’s place on Rue Vieille-du-Temple, he would definitely still be there.
On entering the narrow street, Claude felt a sensation of refreshing coolness come over him. In the sun it had grown very warm, and moisture rose from the pavement, which, however bright the sky, remained damp and greasy beneath the constant tramping of the pedestrians. Every minute, when a push obliged Claude to leave the footwalk, he found himself in danger of being knocked down by trucks or vans. Still the street amused him, with its straggling houses out of line, their flat frontages chequered with signboards up to the very eaves, and pierced with small windows, whence came the hum of every kind of handiwork that can be carried on at home. In one of the narrowest parts of the street a small newspaper shop made him stop. It was betwixt a hairdresser’s and a tripeseller’s, and had an outdoor display of idiotic prints, romantic balderdash mixed with filthy caricatures fit for a barrack-room. In front of these ‘pictures,’ a lank hobbledehoy stood lost in reverie, while two young girls nudged each other and jeered. He felt inclined to slap their faces, but he hurried across the road, for Fagerolles’ house happened to be opposite. It was a dark old tenement, standing forward from the others, and was bespattered like them with the mud from the gutters. As an omnibus came up, Claude barely had time to jump upon the foot pavement, there reduced to the proportions of a simple ledge; the wheels brushed against his chest, and he was drenched to his knees.
On entering the narrow street, Claude felt a refreshing coolness wash over him. It had gotten pretty warm in the sun, and moisture was rising from the pavement, which, no matter how bright the sky, remained damp and greasy beneath the constant flow of pedestrians. Every minute, when a shove forced Claude off the sidewalk, he risked getting knocked down by trucks or vans. Still, the street entertained him, with its mismatched houses, their flat fronts covered in signboards up to the eaves, and small windows through which the buzz of various kinds of work at home spilled out. In one of the narrowest spots, he paused at a small newspaper shop squeezed between a hairdresser and a tripe seller, featuring an outdoor display of silly printouts, romantic nonsense mixed with crude caricatures more suited for a barracks. In front of these “pictures,” a tall, awkward teenager stood deep in thought, while two young girls elbowed each other and laughed. He felt like giving them a smack, but he quickly crossed the street since Fagerolles' house was right across from him. It was a dark old building that stood out from the others and was splattered with mud from the gutters just like them. As an omnibus approached, Claude barely had time to jump onto the sidewalk, which had shrunk to just a simple ledge; the wheels brushed against his chest, and he got soaked up to his knees.
M. Fagerolles, senior, a manufacturer of artistic zinc-work, had his workshops on the ground floor of the building, and having converted two large front rooms on the first floor into a warehouse, he personally occupied a small, dark, cellar-like apartment overlooking the courtyard. It was there that his son Henri had grown up, like a true specimen of the flora of the Paris streets, at the edge of that narrow pavement constantly struck by the omnibus wheels, always soddened by the gutter water, and opposite the print and newspaper shop, flanked by the barber’s and tripeseller’s. At first his father had made an ornamental draughtsman of him for personal use. But when the lad had developed higher ambition, taking to painting proper, and talking about the School of Arts, there had been quarrels, blows, a series of separations and reconciliations. Even now, although Henri had already achieved some successes, the manufacturer of artistic zinc-work, while letting him have his will, treated him harshly, like a lad who was spoiling his career.
M. Fagerolles, senior, a maker of artistic zinc products, had his workshops on the ground floor of the building. He turned two large front rooms on the first floor into a warehouse and personally lived in a small, dark, basement-like apartment that overlooked the courtyard. It was here that his son Henri grew up, a true product of the Paris streets, right by that narrow sidewalk constantly battered by the wheels of omnibuses, always soaked with gutter water, and across from the print and newspaper shop, next to the barber's and the tripe seller's. At first, his father made him an ornamental draftsman for his own use. But when the boy started dreaming bigger, taking to painting and discussing the School of Arts, it led to fights, arguments, a series of breakups and reconciliations. Even now, despite Henri having achieved some success, the maker of artistic zinc products, while allowing him to pursue his desires, treated him harshly, as if he were ruining his own future.
After shaking off the water, Claude went up the deep archway entrance, to a courtyard, where the light was quite greenish, and where there was a dank, musty smell, like that at the bottom of a tank. There was an overhanging roofing of glass and iron at the foot of the staircase, which was a wide one, with a wrought-iron railing, eaten with rust. As the painter passed the warehouse on the first floor, he glanced through a glass door and noticed M. Fagerolles examining some patterns. Wishing to be polite, he entered, in spite of the artistic disgust he felt for all that zinc, coloured to imitate bronze, and having all the repulsive mendacious prettiness of spurious art.
After shaking off the water, Claude went through the deep archway entrance into a courtyard where the light had a greenish tint, and there was a damp, musty smell, like the bottom of a tank. There was a glass and iron roof hanging over the wide staircase, which had a wrought-iron railing that was rusted. As the painter passed the warehouse on the first floor, he glanced through a glass door and saw M. Fagerolles looking at some patterns. Wanting to be polite, he went inside, despite feeling artistically disgusted by all the zinc painted to look like bronze, which had the fake, gaudy appeal of counterfeit art.
‘Good morning, monsieur. Is Henri still at home?’
‘Good morning, sir. Is Henri still home?’
The manufacturer, a stout, sallow-looking man, drew himself straight amidst all his nosegay vases and cruets and statuettes. He had in his hand a new model of a thermometer, formed of a juggling girl who crouched and balanced the glass tube on her nose.
The manufacturer, a stocky, sickly-looking man, straightened up among his collection of decorative vases, bottles, and figurines. In his hand, he held a new design for a thermometer, shaped like a juggling girl who crouched and balanced the glass tube on her nose.
‘Henri did not come in to lunch,’ he answered drily.
‘Henri didn’t come in for lunch,’ he replied dryly.
This cool reception upset Claude. ‘Ah! he did not come back; I beg pardon for having disturbed you, then. Good-day, monsieur.’
This cold response bothered Claude. ‘Oh! He didn’t come back; I’m sorry for interrupting you, then. Have a good day, sir.’
‘Good-day.’
'Good day.'
Once more outside, Claude began to swear to himself. His ill-luck was complete, Fagerolles escaped him also. He even felt vexed with himself for having gone there, and having taken an interest in that picturesque old street; he was infuriated by the romantic gangrene that ever sprouted afresh within him, do what he might. It was his malady, perhaps, the false principle which he sometimes felt like a bar across his skull. And when he had reached the quays again, he thought of going home to see whether his picture was really so very bad. But the mere idea made him tremble all over. His studio seemed a chamber of horrors, where he could no more continue to live, as if, indeed, he had left the corpse of some beloved being there. No, no; to climb the three flights of stairs, to open the door, to shut himself up face to face with ‘that,’ would have needed strength beyond his courage. So he crossed the Seine and went along the Rue St. Jacques. He felt too wretched and lonely; and, come what might, he would go to the Rue d’Enfer to turn Sandoz from his work.
Once outside again, Claude started cursing to himself. His bad luck was total; Fagerolles had gotten away from him too. He was even annoyed with himself for going there and being interested in that charming old street. He was furious at the romantic thoughts that kept creeping back, no matter what he did. It felt like a burden sitting in his head. When he reached the quays again, he thought about going home to see if his painting was really that terrible. But just the thought of it made him shake. His studio felt like a horror house, as if he had left the body of someone he loved there. No, no; climbing the three flights of stairs, opening the door, and facing ‘that’ would have taken more strength than he had. So he crossed the Seine and walked along Rue St. Jacques. He felt too miserable and alone, and no matter what happened, he was going to go to Rue d’Enfer to pull Sandoz away from his work.
Sandoz’s little fourth-floor flat consisted of a dining-room, a bedroom, and a strip of kitchen. It was tenanted by himself alone; his mother, disabled by paralysis, occupied on the other side of the landing a single room, where she lived in morose and voluntary solitude. The street was a deserted one; the windows of the rooms overlooked the gardens of the Deaf and Dumb Asylum, above which rose the rounded crest of a lofty tree, and the square tower of St. Jacques-du-Haut-Pas.
Sandoz’s small fourth-floor apartment had a dining room, a bedroom, and a narrow kitchen. He lived there by himself; his mother, who was paralyzed, stayed in a single room on the other side of the landing, where she led a quiet and self-imposed isolation. The street was empty; the windows of the apartment faced the gardens of the Deaf and Dumb Asylum, beneath the rounded top of a tall tree and the square tower of St. Jacques-du-Haut-Pas.
Claude found Sandoz in his room, bending over his table, busy with a page of ‘copy.’
Claude found Sandoz in his room, leaning over his desk, focused on a page of 'copy.'
‘I am disturbing you?’ said Claude.
“Am I bothering you?” said Claude.
‘Not at all. I have been working ever since morning, and I’ve had enough of it. I’ve been killing myself for the last hour over a sentence that reads anyhow, and which has worried me all through my lunch.’
‘Not at all. I’ve been working since this morning, and I’m done with it. I’ve been stressing over a sentence for the last hour that just doesn’t make sense, and it’s been bothering me all through lunch.’
The painter made a gesture of despair, and the other, seeing him so gloomy, at once understood matters.
The painter gestured in despair, and the other, noticing his gloom, instantly grasped the situation.
‘You don’t get on either, eh? Well, let’s go out. A sharp walk will take a little of the rust off us. Shall we go?’
‘You’re not feeling it either, huh? Well, let’s head out. A brisk walk will shake off some of the rust. Shall we go?’
As he was passing the kitchen, however, an old woman stopped him. It was his charwoman, who, as a rule, came only for two hours in the morning and two hours in the evening. On Thursdays, however, she remained the whole afternoon in order to look after the dinner.
As he was walking by the kitchen, an old woman stopped him. It was his cleaning lady, who usually came for just two hours in the morning and two hours in the evening. However, on Thursdays, she stayed all afternoon to take care of dinner.
‘Then it’s decided, monsieur?’ she asked. ‘It’s to be a piece of skate and a leg of mutton, with potatoes.’
‘So it's settled, sir?’ she asked. ‘It’s going to be skate and a leg of mutton, along with potatoes.’
‘Yes, if you like.’
"Sure, if that's what you want."
‘For how many am I to lay the cloth?’
‘How many people should I set the table for?’
‘Oh! as for that, one never knows. Lay for five, at any rate; we’ll see afterwards. Dinner at seven, eh? we’ll try to be home by then.’
‘Oh! as for that, you never know. Count on five, at least; we’ll figure it out later. Dinner at seven, right? We’ll aim to be home by then.’
When they were on the landing, Sandoz, leaving Claude to wait for him, stole into his mother’s room. When he came out again, in the same discreet affectionate manner, they both went downstairs in silence. Outside, having sniffed to right and left, as if to see which way the wind blew, they ended by going up the street, reached the Place de l’Observatoire, and turned down the Boulevard du Montparnasse. This was their ordinary promenade; they reached the spot instinctively, being fond of the wide expanse of the outer boulevards, where they could roam and lounge at ease. They continued silent, for their heads were heavy still, but the comfort of being together gradually made them more serene. Still it was only when they were opposite the Western Railway Station that Sandoz spoke.
When they got to the landing, Sandoz left Claude to wait for him and quietly entered his mother’s room. When he came out again, still in that discreet, affectionate way, they both went downstairs in silence. Outside, after sniffing to the left and right as if checking the wind direction, they ended up walking up the street, reached the Place de l’Observatoire, and turned down the Boulevard du Montparnasse. This was their usual walk; they arrived there instinctively, enjoying the open space of the outer boulevards where they could stroll and hang out comfortably. They stayed silent because their heads were still heavy, but the comfort of being together slowly made them feel more at ease. It was only when they were in front of the Western Railway Station that Sandoz finally spoke.
‘I say, suppose we go to Mahoudeau’s, to see how he’s getting on with his big machine. I know that he has given “his gods and saints” the slip to-day.’
‘I say, how about we head over to Mahoudeau’s to check out how he’s doing with his big machine? I know he’s managed to escape from “his gods and saints” today.’
‘All right,’ answered Claude. ‘Let’s go to Mahoudeau’s.’
‘Okay,’ Claude replied. ‘Let’s head to Mahoudeau’s.’
They at once turned into the Rue du Cherche-Midi. There, at a few steps from the boulevard, Mahoudeau, a sculptor, had rented the shop of a fruiterer who had failed in business, and he had installed his studio therein, contenting himself with covering the windows with a layer of whitening. At this point, the street, wide and deserted, has a quiet, provincial aspect, with a somewhat ecclesiastical touch. Large gateways stand wide open showing a succession of deep roomy yards; from a cowkeeper’s establishment comes a tepid, pungent smell of litter; and the dead wall of a convent stretches away for a goodly length. It was between this convent and a herbalist’s that the shop transformed into a studio was situated. It still bore on its sign-board the inscription, ‘Fruit and Vegetables,’ in large yellow letters.
They immediately turned onto Rue du Cherche-Midi. Just a short walk from the boulevard, Mahoudeau, a sculptor, had rented the shop of a fruit seller who had gone out of business, and he had set up his studio there, satisfied with covering the windows with a layer of whitewash. At that point, the street, wide and empty, had a calm, provincial look, with a somewhat church-like feel. Large gateways stood wide open, revealing a series of spacious yards; from a dairy farm nearby came a warm, strong smell of straw; and the blank wall of a convent stretched on for quite a distance. The shop that had been converted into a studio was located between this convent and an herbalist's. It still had "Fruit and Vegetables" in large yellow letters on its signboard.
Claude and Sandoz narrowly missed being blinded by some little girls who were skipping in the street. On the foot pavement sat several families whose barricades of chairs compelled the friends to step down on to the roadway. However, they were drawing nigh, when the sight of the herbalist’s shop delayed them for a moment. Between its windows, decked with enemas, bandages, and similar things, beneath the dried herbs hanging above the doorway, whence came a constant aromatic smell, a thin, dark woman stood taking stock of them, while, behind her, in the gloom of the shop, one saw the vague silhouette of a little sickly-looking man, who was coughing and expectorating. The friends nudged each other, their eyes lighted up with bantering mirth; and then they turned the handle of Mahoudeau’s door.
Claude and Sandoz barely avoided getting blinded by some little girls who were skipping in the street. On the sidewalk sat several families whose makeshift barricades of chairs forced the friends to step down onto the road. As they got closer, the sight of the herbalist’s shop made them pause for a moment. Between its windows, filled with enemas, bandages, and other similar items, beneath the dried herbs hanging above the doorway, which gave off a constant aromatic smell, a thin, dark woman stood watching them. Behind her, in the dimness of the shop, the vague outline of a frail-looking man could be seen, coughing and spitting. The friends nudged each other, their eyes sparkling with playful laughter, and then they turned the handle of Mahoudeau’s door.
The shop, though tolerably roomy, was almost filled by a mass of clay: a colossal Bacchante, falling back upon a rock. The wooden stays bent beneath the weight of that almost shapeless pile, of which nothing but some huge limbs could as yet be distinguished. Some water had been spilt on the floor, several muddy buckets straggled here and there, while a heap of moistened plaster was lying in a corner. On the shelves, formerly occupied by fruit and vegetables, were scattered some casts from the antique, covered with a tracery of cinder-like dust which had gradually collected there. A wash-house kind of dampness, a stale smell of moist clay, rose from the floor. And the wretchedness of this sculptor’s studio and the dirt attendant upon the profession were made still more conspicuous by the wan light that filtered through the shop windows besmeared with whitening.
The shop, while somewhat spacious, was nearly filled with a mass of clay: a giant Bacchante, leaning back against a rock. The wooden supports bent under the weight of that almost formless pile, of which only some large limbs could barely be seen. Some water had spilled on the floor, and several muddy buckets were scattered around, while a pile of damp plaster sat in one corner. On the shelves, which used to hold fruit and vegetables, were a few casts from antiquity, covered in a layer of dust like cinders that had collected over time. A washing-room kind of dampness and a musty smell of wet clay rose from the floor. The dismal state of the sculptor’s studio and the messiness of the craft were made even more apparent by the pale light that filtered through the shop windows smeared with whitewash.
‘What! is it you?’ shouted Mahoudeau, who sat before his female figure, smoking a pipe.
‘What! Is that you?’ shouted Mahoudeau, who was sitting in front of his female figure, smoking a pipe.
He was small and thin, with a bony face, already wrinkled at twenty-seven. His black mane-like hair lay entangled over his very low forehead, and his sallow mask, ugly almost to ferociousness, was lighted up by a pair of childish eyes, bright and empty, which smiled with winning simplicity. The son of a stonemason of Plassans, he had achieved great success at the local art competitions, and had afterwards come to Paris as the town laureate, with an allowance of eight hundred francs per annum, for a period of four years. In the capital, however, he had found himself at sea, defenceless, failing in his competitions at the School of Arts, and spending his allowance to no purpose; so that, at the end of his term, he had been obliged for a livelihood to enter the employment of a dealer in church statues, at whose establishment, for ten hours a day, he scraped away at St. Josephs, St. Rochs, Mary Magdalens, and, in fact, all the saints of the calendar. For the last six months, however, he had experienced a revival of ambition, on finding himself once more among his comrades of Provence, the eldest of whom he was—fellows whom he had known at Geraud’s boarding-school for little boys, and who had since grown into savage revolutionaries. At present, through his constant intercourse with impassioned artists, who troubled his brain with all sorts of wild theories, his ambition aimed at the gigantic.
He was small and thin, with a bony face that was already wrinkled at twenty-seven. His black hair was tangled over his very low forehead, and his pale face, almost ugly to a frightening degree, was brightened by a pair of childlike eyes—bright and empty—that smiled with an uncomplicated charm. The son of a stonemason from Plassans, he had found success in local art competitions and then moved to Paris as the town's laureate, with a yearly allowance of eight hundred francs for four years. However, in the capital, he felt lost and vulnerable, failing in his competitions at the School of Arts and wasting his allowance; by the end of his term, he had to take a job with a dealer in church statues, where he spent ten hours a day working on St. Josephs, St. Rochs, Mary Magdalens, and basically all the saints in the calendar. For the last six months, though, he had felt a resurgence of ambition, being back among his fellow Provencal artists, the oldest of whom he was—friends he had known at Geraud’s boarding school for young boys, who had since become fervent revolutionaries. Currently, through his constant interactions with passionate artists, who filled his head with various radical theories, his ambition reached for the monumental.
‘The devil!’ said Claude, ‘there’s a lump.’
‘The devil!’ said Claude, ‘there’s a bump.’
The sculptor, delighted, gave a long pull at his pipe, and blew a cloud of smoke.
The sculptor, thrilled, took a long drag on his pipe and exhaled a cloud of smoke.
‘Eh, isn’t it? I am going to give them some flesh, and living flesh, too; not the bladders of lard that they turn out.’
‘Eh, isn’t it? I’m going to give them some real substance, and living substance, too; not the greasy stuff they produce.’
‘It’s a woman bathing, isn’t it?’ asked Sandoz.
‘It’s a woman taking a bath, right?’ asked Sandoz.
‘No; I shall put some vine leaves around her head. A Bacchante, you understand.’
‘No; I’ll put some vine leaves around her head. A Bacchante, you know.’
At this Claude flew into a violent passion.
At this, Claude flew into a rage.
‘A Bacchante? Do you want to make fools of people? Does such a thing as a Bacchante exist? A vintaging girl, eh? And quite modern, dash it all. I know she’s nude, so let her be a peasant woman who has undressed. And that must be properly conveyed, mind; people must realise that she lives.’
‘A Bacchante? Are you trying to make a fool out of everyone? Does a Bacchante even exist? A girl from the vineyard, huh? And pretty modern, I must say. I see she’s nude, so let’s think of her as a peasant woman who has taken off her clothes. And we need to make that clear; people must understand that she’s alive.’
Mahoudeau, taken aback, listened, trembling. He was afraid of Claude, and bowed to his ideal of strength and truth. So he even improved upon the painter’s idea.
Mahoudeau, caught off guard, listened, shaking. He was intimidated by Claude and respected his ideal of strength and honesty. So he even built on the painter’s concept.
‘Yes, yes, that’s what I meant to say—a vintaging girl. And you’ll see whether there isn’t a real touch of woman about her.’
'Yeah, yeah, that’s what I meant to say—a vintage girl. And you’ll see if there isn’t a genuine sense of femininity about her.'
At that moment Sandoz, who had been making the tour of the huge block of clay, exclaimed: ‘Why, here’s that sneak of a Chaîne.’
At that moment, Sandoz, who had been walking around the massive block of clay, exclaimed, “Look, there’s that sneaky Chaîne.”
Behind the pile, indeed, sat Chaîne, a burly fellow who was quietly painting away, copying the fireless rusty stove on a small canvas. It could be told that he was a peasant by his heavy, deliberate manner and his bull-neck, tanned and hardened like leather. His only noticeable feature was his forehead, displaying all the bumps of obstinacy; for his nose was so small as to be lost between his red cheeks, while a stiff beard hid his powerful jaws. He came from Saint Firmin, a village about six miles from Plassans, where he had been a cow-boy, until he drew for the conscription; and his misfortunes dated from the enthusiasm that a gentleman of the neighbourhood had shown for the walking-stick handles which he carved out of roots with his knife. From that moment, having become a rustic genius, an embryo great man for this local connoisseur, who happened to be a member of the museum committee, he had been helped by him, adulated and driven crazy with hopes; but he had successively failed in everything—his studies and competitions—thus missing the town’s purse. Nevertheless, he had started for Paris, after worrying his father, a wretched peasant, into premature payment of his heritage, a thousand francs, on which he reckoned to live for a twelvemonth while awaiting the promised victory. The thousand francs had lasted eighteen months. Then, as he had only twenty francs left, he had taken up his quarters with his friend, Mahoudeau. They both slept in the same bed, in the dark back shop; they both in turn cut slices from the same loaves of bread—of which they bought sufficient for a fortnight at a time, so that it might get very hard, and that they might thus be able to eat but little of it.
Behind the pile, indeed, sat Chaîne, a burly guy who was quietly painting away, copying the cold, rusty stove on a small canvas. You could tell he was a peasant by his heavy, deliberate manner and his bull neck, tanned and tough like leather. His only noticeable feature was his forehead, showing all the bumps of stubbornness; his nose was so small it got lost between his red cheeks, while a stiff beard hid his strong jaws. He came from Saint Firmin, a village about six miles from Plassans, where he had been a cowboy until he got called up for the draft; and his misfortunes began with the enthusiasm that a local gentleman had shown for the walking-stick handles he carved from roots with his knife. From that moment on, having become a rustic genius, a budding great man for this local connoisseur, who happened to be on the museum committee, he had been supported by him, adored, and driven insane with hopes; but he had successively failed at everything—his studies and competitions—thus missing out on the town’s funding. Still, he had set off for Paris, after pushing his father, a poor peasant, into early payment of his inheritance, a thousand francs, which he planned to live on for a year while waiting for the promised success. The thousand francs lasted eighteen months. Then, with only twenty francs left, he moved in with his friend, Mahoudeau. They both slept in the same bed in the dark back shop; they each took turns cutting slices from the same loaves of bread—of which they bought enough for a fortnight at a time, allowing it to get very hard so they could eat less of it.
‘I say, Chaîne,’ continued Sandoz, ‘your stove is really very exact.’
‘I say, Chaîne,’ Sandoz continued, ‘your stove is really quite accurate.’
Chaîne, without answering, gave a chuckle of triumph which lighted up his face like a sunbeam. By a crowning stroke of imbecility, and to make his misfortunes perfect, his protector’s advice had thrown him into painting, in spite of the real taste that he showed for wood carving. And he painted like a whitewasher, mixing his colours as a hodman mixes his mortar, and managing to make the clearest and brightest of them quite muddy. His triumph consisted, however, in combining exactness with awkwardness; he displayed all the naive minuteness of the primitive painters; in fact, his mind, barely raised from the clods, delighted in petty details. The stove, with its perspective all awry, was tame and precise, and in colour as dingy as mire.
Chaîne, without replying, let out a triumphant chuckle that lit up his face like a ray of sunshine. In a final act of foolishness, and to make his misfortunes even worse, his protector’s advice had led him to painting, despite the real talent he had for wood carving. He painted like a house painter, mixing his colors as a laborer mixes his mortar, managing to turn the brightest and clearest shades into a muddy mess. His triumph lay, however, in combining accuracy with clumsiness; he showed all the naive detail of the early painters; in fact, his mind, still grounded in the dirt, found joy in trivial details. The stove, with its distorted perspective, was both tame and precise, and its colors as dull as mud.
Claude approached and felt full of compassion at the sight of that painting, and though he was as a rule so harsh towards bad painters, his compassion prompted him to say a word of praise.
Claude approached and was filled with compassion at the sight of that painting, and even though he usually was very critical of poor painters, his compassion led him to offer a word of praise.
‘Ah! one can’t say that you are a trickster; you paint, at any rate, as you feel. Very good, indeed.’
‘Ah! you can’t say you’re a trickster; you paint what you feel, at least. Very good, indeed.’
However, the door of the shop had opened, and a good-looking, fair fellow, with a big pink nose, and large, blue, short-sighted eyes, entered shouting:
However, the door of the shop had opened, and a good-looking, fair guy, with a big pink nose and large, blue, short-sighted eyes, walked in shouting:
‘I say, why does that herbalist woman next door always stand on her doorstep? What an ugly mug she’s got!’
‘I wonder why that herbalist woman next door always stands on her doorstep? She has such an unattractive face!’
They all laughed, except Mahoudeau, who seemed very much embarrassed.
They all laughed, except Mahoudeau, who looked really embarrassed.
‘Jory, the King of Blunderers,’ declared Sandoz, shaking hands with the new comer.
‘Jory, the King of Blunders,’ announced Sandoz, shaking hands with the newcomer.
‘Why? What? Is Mahoudeau interested in her? I didn’t know,’ resumed Jory, when he had at length grasped the situation. ‘Well, well, what does it matter? When everything’s said, they are all irresistible.’
‘Why? What? Is Mahoudeau into her? I didn’t know,’ Jory continued, after finally understanding the situation. ‘Well, well, what does it matter? When it comes down to it, they’re all irresistible.’
‘As for you,’ the sculptor rejoined, ‘I can see you have tumbled on your lady-love’s finger-nails again. She has dug a bit out of your cheek!’
‘As for you,’ the sculptor replied, ‘I can see you’ve gotten into it with your girlfriend’s nails again. She’s left a mark on your cheek!’
They all burst out laughing anew, while Jory, in his turn, reddened. In fact, his face was scratched: there were even two deep gashes across it. The son of a magistrate of Plassans, whom he had driven half-crazy by his dissolute conduct, he had crowned everything by running away with a music-hall singer under the pretext of going to Paris to follow the literary profession. During the six months that they had been camping together in a shady hotel of the Quartier Latin, the girl had almost flayed him alive each time she caught him paying attention to anybody else of her sex. And, as this often happened, he always had some fresh scar to show—a bloody nose, a torn ear, or a damaged eye, swollen and blackened.
They all erupted into laughter again, while Jory, in turn, turned red. In fact, his face was marked up: there were even two deep cuts across it. The son of a magistrate from Plassans, who he had driven almost mad with his reckless behavior, had topped it all off by running away with a nightclub singer under the excuse of heading to Paris to pursue a writing career. During the six months they had been living together in a shady hotel in the Latin Quarter, the girl had nearly skinned him alive every time she saw him paying attention to any other woman. And, since this happened frequently, he always had some new scar to show—a bloody nose, a torn ear, or a swollen, bruised eye.
At last they all began to talk, with the exception of Chaîne, who went on painting with the determined expression of an ox at the plough. Jory had at once gone into ecstasies over the roughly indicated figure of the vintaging girl. He worshipped a massive style of beauty. His first writings in his native town had been some Parnassian sonnets celebrating the copious charms of a handsome pork-butcheress. In Paris—where he had fallen in with the whole band of Plassans—he had taken to art criticism, and, for a livelihood, he wrote articles for twenty francs apiece in a small, slashing paper called ‘The Drummer.’ Indeed, one of these articles, a study on a picture by Claude exhibited at Papa Malgras’s, had just caused a tremendous scandal; for Jory had therein run down all the painters whom the public appreciated to extol his friend, whom he set up as the leader of a new school, the school of the ‘open air.’ Very practical at heart, he did not care in reality a rap about anything that did not conduce to his own pleasures; he simply repeated the theories he heard enunciated by his friends. ‘I say, Mahoudeau,’ he now exclaimed, ‘you shall have an article; I’ll launch that woman of yours. What limbs, my boys! She’s magnificent!’
Finally, they all started talking, except for Chaîne, who kept painting with the determined look of an ox plowing a field. Jory immediately went into raptures over the roughly sketched figure of the vintaging girl. He adored a bold style of beauty. His first writings in his hometown were Parnassian sonnets celebrating the abundant charms of a striking pork butcheress. In Paris—where he had joined the whole group from Plassans—he switched to art criticism, and to make a living, he wrote articles for twenty francs each in a small, edgy paper called ‘The Drummer.’ In fact, one of those articles, a critique of a painting by Claude showcased at Papa Malgras’s, had just sparked a massive scandal; Jory had criticized all the painters that the public liked in order to praise his friend, whom he presented as the leader of a new movement, the ‘open air’ school. Very practical at heart, he didn’t actually care about anything that didn’t serve his own pleasures; he simply echoed the theories he heard from his friends. ‘Hey, Mahoudeau,’ he now exclaimed, ‘I’ll write an article for you; I’ll promote that woman of yours. What limbs, my friends! She’s stunning!’
Then suddenly changing the conversation: ‘By the way,’ he said, ‘my miserly father has apologised. He is afraid I shall drag his name through the mud, so he sends me a hundred francs a month now. I am paying my debts.’
Then suddenly changing the conversation: ‘By the way,’ he said, ‘my stingy father has apologized. He’s worried I’ll ruin his reputation, so he’s now sending me a hundred francs a month. I’m paying off my debts.’
‘Debts! you are too careful to have any,’ muttered Sandoz, with a smile.
‘Debts! You’re too careful to have any,’ Sandoz muttered with a smile.
In fact, Jory displayed a hereditary tightness of fist which much amused his friends. He managed to lead a profligate life without money and without incurring debts; and with the skill he thus displayed was allied constant duplicity, a habit of incessantly lying, which he had contracted in the devout sphere of his family, where his anxiety to hide his vices had made him lie about everything at all hours, and even without occasion. But he now gave a superb reply, the cry of a sage of deep experience.
In fact, Jory had a hereditary tightness of fist that greatly amused his friends. He managed to live a reckless life without money and without going into debt; and alongside the skill he showed was a constant deceitfulness, a habit of endlessly lying that he developed in the devout atmosphere of his family, where his desire to hide his flaws made him lie about everything at all times, even without reason. But now he gave a superb response, the voice of a wise man with deep experience.
‘Oh, you fellows, you don’t know the worth of money!’
‘Oh, you guys, you really don’t understand the value of money!’
This time he was hooted. What a philistine! And the invectives continued, when some light taps on one of the window-panes suddenly made the din cease.
This time he got booed. What a jerk! And the insults kept coming, until some light taps on one of the window-panes suddenly made the noise stop.
‘She is really becoming a nuisance,’ said Mahoudeau, with a gesture of annoyance.
‘She is really becoming a pain,’ said Mahoudeau, with a gesture of annoyance.
‘Eh? Who is it? The herbalist woman?’ asked Jory. ‘Let her come in; it will be great fun.’
‘Huh? Who is it? The herbalist lady?’ asked Jory. ‘Let her in; it’ll be a blast.’
The door indeed had already been opened, and Mahoudeau’s neighbour, Madame Jabouille, or Mathilde, as she was familiarly called, appeared on the threshold. She was about thirty, with a flat face horribly emaciated, and passionate eyes, the lids of which had a bluish tinge as if they were bruised. It was said that some members of the clergy had brought about her marriage with little Jabouille, at a time when the latter’s business was still flourishing, thanks to the custom of all the pious folk of the neighbourhood. The truth was, that one sometimes espied black cassocks stealthily crossing that mysterious shop, where all the aromatic herbs set a perfume of incense. A kind of cloistral quietude pervaded the place; the devotees who came in spoke in low voices, as if in a confessional, slipped their purchases into their bags furtively, and went off with downcast eyes. Unfortunately, some very horrid rumours had got abroad—slander invented by the wine-shop keeper opposite, said pious folks. At any rate, since the widower had re-married, the business had been going to the dogs. The glass jars seemed to have lost all their brightness, and the dried herbs, suspended from the ceiling, were tumbling to dust. Jabouille himself was coughing his life out, reduced to a very skeleton. And although Mathilde professed to be religious, the pious customers gradually deserted her, being of opinion that she made herself too conspicuous with young fellows of the neighbourhood now that Jabouille was almost eaten out of house and home.
The door had already been opened, and Mahoudeau’s neighbor, Madame Jabouille, or Mathilde, as she was affectionately called, stood in the doorway. She was about thirty, with a gaunt face that looked alarmingly thin, and passionate eyes with eyelids that had a bluish hue as if they were bruised. It was rumored that some members of the clergy had orchestrated her marriage to little Jabouille when his business was still thriving, thanks to the regular clientele of devout locals. The truth was that you could sometimes spot black cassocks stealthily crossing that mysterious shop, where the aromatic herbs filled the air with a scent like incense. The place had a cloistered tranquility; the devotees who entered spoke in hushed tones, as if in a confessional, slipped their purchases into bags discreetly, and left with their eyes cast down. Unfortunately, some terrible rumors had circulated—slander concocted by the wine shop owner across the street, claimed the faithful. At any rate, since the widower had remarried, the business had gone downhill. The glass jars seemed to have lost all their luster, and the dried herbs hanging from the ceiling were falling to dust. Jabouille himself was coughing constantly, looking like a mere skeleton. And even though Mathilde claimed to be religious, the pious customers gradually started to abandon her, believing that she was too open with the local young men now that Jabouille was nearly destitute.
For a moment Mathilde remained motionless, blinking her eyes. A pungent smell had spread through the shop, a smell of simples, which she brought with her in her clothes and greasy, tumbled hair; the sickly sweetness of mallow, the sharp odour of elderseed, the bitter effluvia of rhubarb, but, above all, the hot whiff of peppermint, which seemed like her very breath.
For a moment, Mathilde stood still, blinking her eyes. A strong smell filled the shop, a scent of herbs that clung to her clothes and messy, greasy hair; the sickly sweetness of mallow, the sharp smell of elderseed, the bitter fumes of rhubarb, but most of all, the strong whiff of peppermint that felt like her very breath.
She made a gesture of feigned surprise. ‘Oh, dear me! you have company—I did not know; I’ll drop in again.’
She pretended to be surprised. "Oh my! You have company—I didn’t realize; I’ll come back another time."
‘Yes, do,’ said Mahoudeau, looking very vexed. ‘Besides, I am going out; you can give me a sitting on Sunday.’
‘Yeah, go ahead,’ said Mahoudeau, looking really annoyed. ‘Also, I’m heading out; you can give me a sitting on Sunday.’
At this Claude, stupefied, fairly stared at the emaciated Mathilde, and then at the huge vintaging woman.
At this, Claude, stunned, stared at the skinny Mathilde and then at the large woman making wine.
‘What?’ he cried, ‘is it madame who poses for that figure? The dickens, you exaggerate!’
‘What?’ he exclaimed, ‘is it the lady who models for that figure? You're kidding, you’re exaggerating!’
Then the laughter began again, while the sculptor stammered his explanations. ‘Oh! she only poses for the head and the hands, and merely just to give me a few indications.’
Then the laughter started again, while the sculptor fumbled over his explanations. ‘Oh! she only poses for the head and the hands, and just to give me a few hints.’
Mathilde, however, laughed with the others, with a sharp, brazen-faced laughter, showing the while the gaping holes in her mouth, where several teeth were wanting.
Mathilde, however, laughed along with the others, her laughter sharp and bold, revealing the gaps in her mouth where several teeth were missing.
‘Yes,’ resumed Mahoudeau. ‘I have to go out on some business now. Isn’t it so, you fellows, we are expected over yonder?’
‘Yeah,’ Mahoudeau continued. ‘I have to head out for some work now. Isn’t that right, you guys? We're expected over there?’
He had winked at his friends, feeling eager for a good lounge. They all answered that they were expected, and helped him to cover the figure of the vintaging girl with some strips of old linen which were soaking in a pail of water.
He winked at his friends, excited for a good hangout. They all replied that they were ready, and helped him cover the figure of the vintage girl with some strips of old linen that were soaking in a bucket of water.
However, Mathilde, looking submissive but sad, did not stir. She merely shifted from one place to another, when they pushed against her, while Chaîne, who was no longer painting, glanced at her over his picture. So far, he had not opened his lips. But as Mahoudeau at last went off with his three friends, he made up his mind to ask, in his husky voice:
However, Mathilde, appearing submissive yet sad, didn’t move. She just changed positions when they nudged her, while Chaîne, who had stopped painting, looked at her over his artwork. Until then, he hadn’t spoken a word. But as Mahoudeau finally left with his three friends, he decided to ask, in his raspy voice:
‘Shall you come home to-night?’
"Will you come home tonight?"
‘Very late. Have your dinner and go to bed. Good-bye.’
‘Really late. Eat your dinner and head to bed. Bye.’
Then Chaîne remained alone with Mathilde in the damp shop, amidst the heaps of clay and the puddles of water, while the chalky light from the whitened windows glared crudely over all the wretched untidiness.
Then Chaîne stayed alone with Mathilde in the damp shop, surrounded by piles of clay and puddles of water, while the harsh light from the whitewashed windows shone starkly over all the messy disarray.
Meantime the four others, Claude and Mahoudeau, Jory and Sandoz, strolled along, seeming to take up the whole width of the Boulevard des Invalides. It was the usual thing, the band was gradually increased by the accession of comrades picked up on the way, and then came the wild march of a horde upon the war-path. With the bold assurance of their twenty summers, these young fellows took possession of the foot pavement. The moment they were together trumpets seemed to sound in advance of them; they seized upon Paris and quietly dropped it into their pockets. There was no longer the slightest doubt about their victory; they freely displayed their threadbare coats and old shoes, like destined conquerors of to-morrow who disdained bagatelles, and had only to take the trouble to become the masters of all the luxury surrounding them. And all this was attended by huge contempt for everything that was not art—contempt for fortune, contempt for the world at large, and, above all, contempt for politics. What was the good of all such rubbish? Only a lot of incapables meddled with it. A warped view of things, magnificent in its very injustice, exalted them; an intentional ignorance of the necessities of social life, the crazy dream of having none but artists upon earth. They seemed very stupid at times, but, all the same, their passion made them strong and brave.
Meanwhile, the four others—Claude, Mahoudeau, Jory, and Sandoz—strolled along, taking up the entire width of the Boulevard des Invalides. This was typical; their group grew as they picked up friends along the way, turning into a wild march like a horde on the warpath. With the bold confidence of their twenty years, these young men claimed the sidewalk. The moment they gathered, it felt like trumpets were sounding in front of them; they took over Paris and casually tucked it into their pockets. There was no doubt about their victory; they proudly displayed their worn-out coats and old shoes, like future conquerors who dismissed trivialities, knowing all they had to do was become masters of the luxury around them. This attitude was accompanied by a deep disdain for everything that wasn’t art—contempt for wealth, contempt for the world at large, and especially contempt for politics. What was the point of all that nonsense? Only a bunch of incompetent people got involved in it. A skewed perspective, magnificent in its injustice, lifted their spirits; a deliberate ignorance of social life’s necessities fueled their crazy dream of a world filled only with artists. They sometimes seemed foolish, but their passion made them strong and brave.
Claude became excited. Faith in himself revived amidst the glow of common hopes. His worry of the morning had only left a vague numbness behind, and he now once more began to discuss his picture with Sandoz and Mahoudeau, swearing, it is true, that he would destroy it the next day. Jory, who was very short-sighted, stared at all the elderly ladies he met, and aired his theories on artistic work. A man ought to give his full measure at once in the first spurt of inspiration; as for himself, he never corrected anything. And, still discussing, the four friends went on down the boulevard, which, with its comparative solitude, and its endless rows of fine trees, seemed to have been expressly designed as an arena for their disputations. When they reached the Esplanade, the wrangling became so violent that they stopped in the middle of that large open space. Beside himself, Claude called Jory a numskull; was it not better to destroy one’s work than to launch a mediocre performance upon the world? Truckling to trade was really disgusting. Mahoudeau and Sandoz, on their side, shouted both together at the same time. Some passers-by, feeling uneasy, turned round to look, and at last gathered round these furious young fellows, who seemed bent on swallowing each other. But they went off vexed, thinking that some practical joke had been played upon them, when they suddenly saw the quartette, all good friends again, go into raptures over a wet-nurse, dressed in light colours, with long cherry-tinted ribbons streaming from her cap. There, now! That was something like—what a tint, what a bright note it set amid the surroundings! Delighted, blinking their eyes, they followed the nurse under the trees, and then suddenly seemed roused and astonished to find they had already come so far. The Esplanade, open on all sides, save on the south, where rose the distant pile of the Hôtel des Invalides, delighted them—it was so vast, so quiet; they there had plenty of room for their gestures; and they recovered breath there, although they were always declaring that Paris was far too small for them, and lacked sufficient air to inflate their ambitious lungs.
Claude got excited. His self-confidence came back amidst the shared hopes. The worry from the morning only left him feeling a bit numb, and he began talking about his painting again with Sandoz and Mahoudeau, swearing he’d destroy it the next day. Jory, who was very short-sighted, stared at every older lady he passed and shared his theories on art. A man should give his all in the first burst of inspiration; for him, he never edited anything. While still discussing, the four friends walked down the boulevard, which, with its comparative solitude and long rows of beautiful trees, seemed like the perfect place for their arguments. When they reached the Esplanade, their debate got so heated that they stopped in the middle of the large open space. Frustrated, Claude called Jory a fool; wasn’t it better to destroy your work than to put out something mediocre? Caving to commercialism was just disgusting. Mahoudeau and Sandoz shouted at the same time in response. Some passers-by, feeling uneasy, turned to look, and eventually gathered around these furious young men, who seemed ready to claw each other apart. But they left annoyed, thinking it was just a prank when they suddenly saw the group, now all friends again, getting ecstatic over a wet-nurse dressed in light colors, with long cherry-red ribbons fluttering from her cap. There it was! That was something special—what a color, what a bright contrast it made in the surroundings! Delighted, squinting their eyes, they followed the nurse under the trees, and then suddenly seemed surprised to realize how far they had gone. The Esplanade, open on all sides except for the south, where the distant Hôtel des Invalides loomed, thrilled them—it felt so vast, so peaceful; they had enough space for their gestures and caught their breath there, even as they always claimed that Paris was way too small for them and didn’t have enough air for their ambitious spirits.
‘Are you going anywhere particular?’ asked Sandoz of Mahoudeau and Jory.
‘Are you guys going anywhere special?’ Sandoz asked Mahoudeau and Jory.
‘No,’ answered the latter, ‘we are going with you. Where are you going?’
‘No,’ replied the latter, ‘we're going with you. Where are you headed?’
Claude, gazing carelessly about him, muttered: ‘I don’t know. That way, if you like.’
Claude, looking around aimlessly, mumbled, "I don't know. That way, if you want."
They turned on to the Quai d’Orsay, and went as far as the Pont de la Concorde. In front of the Corps Legislatif the painter remarked, with an air of disgust: ‘What a hideous pile!’
They turned onto the Quai d’Orsay and went all the way to the Pont de la Concorde. In front of the Corps Legislatif, the painter said with a look of disgust, “What an ugly building!”
‘Jules Favre made a fine speech the other day. How he did rile Rouher,’ said Jory.
‘Jules Favre gave a great speech the other day. He really irritated Rouher,’ said Jory.
However, the others left him no time to proceed, the disputes began afresh. ‘Who was Jules Favre? Who was Rouher? Did they exist? A parcel of idiots whom no one would remember ten years after their death.’ The young men had now begun to cross the bridge, and they shrugged their shoulders with compassion. Then, on reaching the Place de la Concorde, they stopped short and relapsed into silence.
However, the others didn't give him a chance to continue, and the arguments started up again. ‘Who was Jules Favre? Who was Rouher? Did they even exist? A bunch of idiots that nobody will remember ten years after they’re gone.’ The young men had begun to cross the bridge, and they shrugged their shoulders in pity. Then, upon reaching the Place de la Concorde, they suddenly stopped and fell silent.
‘Well,’ opined Claude at last, ‘this isn’t bad, by any means.’
‘Well,’ Claude finally said, ‘this isn’t bad at all.’
It was four o’clock, and the day was waning amidst a glorious powdery shimmer. To the right and left, towards the Madeleine and towards the Corps Legislatif, lines of buildings stretched away, showing against the sky, while in the Tuileries Gardens rose gradients of lofty rounded chestnut trees. And between the verdant borders of the pleasure walks, the avenue of the Champs Elysées sloped upward as far as the eye could reach, topped by the colossal Arc de Triomphe, agape in front of the infinite. A double current, a twofold stream rolled along—horses showing like living eddies, vehicles like retreating waves, which the reflections of a panel or the sudden sparkle of the glass of a carriage lamp seemed to tip with white foam. Lower down, the square—with its vast footways, its roads as broad as lakes—was filled with a constant ebb and flow, crossed in every direction by whirling wheels, and peopled with black specks of men, while the two fountains plashed and streamed, exhaling delicious coolness amid all the ardent life.
It was four o'clock, and the day was fading in a beautiful powdery glow. To the right and left, towards the Madeleine and the Corps Legislatif, lines of buildings extended into the sky, while in the Tuileries Gardens, tall rounded chestnut trees rose up. Between the green edges of the pleasure walks, the Champs Elysées sloped upward as far as the eye could see, topped by the massive Arc de Triomphe, open to the vastness beyond. A double current, a dual stream flowed along—horses moving like lively eddies, vehicles like retreating waves, with reflections from a sign or the sudden gleam of a carriage lamp appearing to tip them with white foam. Down below, the square—with its wide sidewalks and roads as broad as lakes—was filled with a constant ebb and flow, crisscrossed in every direction by spinning wheels and dotted with small figures of people, while the two fountains splashed and streamed, releasing refreshing coolness amid all the lively action.
Claude, quivering with excitement, kept saying: ‘Ah! Paris! It’s ours. We have only to take it.’
Claude, trembling with excitement, kept saying: ‘Ah! Paris! It’s ours. We just have to take it.’
They all grew excited, their eyes opened wide with desire. Was it not glory herself that swept from the summit of that avenue over the whole capital? Paris was there, and they longed to make her theirs.
They all got excited, their eyes wide with desire. Was it not glory itself that flowed down from the top of that street over the entire city? Paris was there, and they wanted to claim her for themselves.
‘Well, we’ll take her one day,’ said Sandoz, with his obstinate air.
‘Well, we’ll take her one day,’ Sandoz said, with his stubborn attitude.
‘To be sure we shall,’ said Mahoudeau and Jory in the simplest manner.
‘Of course we will,’ said Mahoudeau and Jory casually.
They had resumed walking; they still roamed about, found themselves behind the Madeleine, and went up the Rue Tronchet. At last, as they reached the Place du Havre, Sandoz exclaimed, ‘So we are going to Baudequin’s, eh?’
They had started walking again; they were still wandering around, ended up behind the Madeleine, and walked up the Rue Tronchet. Finally, when they got to the Place du Havre, Sandoz said, ‘So we’re heading to Baudequin’s, huh?’
The others looked as if they had dropped from the sky; in fact, it did seem as if they were going to Baudequin’s.
The others looked like they had just fallen from the sky; in fact, it really seemed like they were heading to Baudequin’s.
‘What day of the week is it?’ asked Claude. ‘Thursday, eh? Then Fagerolles and Gagnière are sure to be there. Let’s go to Baudequin’s.’
‘What day of the week is it?’ asked Claude. ‘Thursday, right? Then Fagerolles and Gagnière are definitely going to be there. Let’s head to Baudequin’s.’
And thereupon they went up the Rue d’Amsterdam. They had just crossed Paris, one of their favourite rambles, but they took other routes at times—from one end of the quays to the other; or from the Porte St. Jacques to the Moulineaux, or else to Père-la-Chaise, followed by a roundabout return along the outer boulevards. They roamed the streets, the open spaces, the crossways; they rambled on for whole days, as long as their legs would carry them, as if intent on conquering one district after another by hurling their revolutionary theories at the house-fronts; and the pavement seemed to be their property—all the pavement touched by their feet, all that old battleground whence arose intoxicating fumes which made them forget their lassitude.
And then they walked up Rue d’Amsterdam. They had just crossed Paris, one of their favorite strolls, but they sometimes took different routes—from one end of the quays to the other; or from Porte St. Jacques to the Moulineaux, or to Père-la-Chaise, followed by a roundabout return along the outer boulevards. They explored the streets, the open spaces, the intersections; they wandered for entire days, as long as their legs could take it, as if they were determined to conquer one neighborhood after another by throwing their revolutionary ideas at the building facades; and the pavement felt like their own—all the pavement their feet touched, all that old battleground from which intoxicating scents rose, making them forget their weariness.
The Café Baudequin was situated on the Boulevard des Batignolles, at the corner of the Rue Darcet. Without the least why or wherefore, it had been selected by the band as their meeting-place, though Gagnière alone lived in the neighbourhood. They met there regularly on Sunday nights; and on Thursday afternoons, at about five o’clock, those who were then at liberty had made it a habit to look in for a moment. That day, as the weather was fine and bright, the little tables outside under the awning were occupied by rows of customers, obstructing the footway. But the band hated all elbowing and public exhibition, so they jostled the other people in order to go inside, where all was deserted and cool.
The Café Baudequin was located on the Boulevard des Batignolles, at the corner of Rue Darcet. For no apparent reason, it had been chosen by the group as their hangout, even though only Gagnière lived nearby. They gathered there regularly on Sunday nights; and on Thursday afternoons, around five o'clock, those who were free would stop by for a quick visit. That day, with the weather being nice and sunny, the small tables outside under the awning were filled with customers, blocking the walkway. However, the group disliked any kind of crowding or public attention, so they pushed through the other patrons to get inside, where it was quiet and cool.
‘Hallo, there’s Fagerolles by himself,’ exclaimed Claude.
‘Hey, there’s Fagerolles all by himself,’ exclaimed Claude.
He had gone straight to their usual table at the end of the café, on the left, where he shook hands with a pale, thin, young man, whose pert girlish face was lighted up by a pair of winning, satirical grey eyes, which at times flashed like steel. They all sat down and ordered beer, after which the painter resumed:
He went straight to their usual table at the back of the café, on the left, where he shook hands with a pale, thin young man, whose cute, boyish face was lit up by a pair of charming, sarcastic gray eyes that sometimes sparkled like steel. They all sat down and ordered beers, after which the painter continued:
‘Do you know that I went to look for you at your father’s; and a nice reception he gave me.’
‘Do you know that I went to look for you at your dad’s; and he gave me a nice welcome.’
Fagerolles, who affected a low devil-may-care style, slapped his thighs. ‘Oh, the old fellow plagues me! I hooked it this morning, after a row. He wants me to draw some things for his beastly zinc stuff. As if I hadn’t enough zinc stuff at the Art School.’
Fagerolles, who put on a laid-back, carefree attitude, slapped his thighs. ‘Oh, that old guy really bothers me! I got roped into this earlier today after a fight. He wants me to sketch some things for his awful zinc materials. As if I didn’t already have enough zinc projects at the Art School.’
This slap at the professors delighted the young man’s friends. He amused them and made himself their idol by dint of alternate flattery and blame. His smile went from one to the other, while, by the aid of a few drops of beer spilt on the table, his long nimble fingers began tracing complicated sketches. His art evidently came very easily to him; it seemed as if he could do anything with a turn of the hand.
This jab at the professors made the young man's friends very happy. He entertained them and became their idol by balancing compliments with criticism. His smile moved from one friend to the next while, with a few drops of beer spilled on the table, his quick fingers started drawing intricate designs. His talent clearly came effortlessly; it was as if he could create anything with just a flick of his wrist.
‘And Gagnière?’ asked Mahoudeau; ‘haven’t you seen him?’
‘And Gagnière?’ Mahoudeau asked. ‘Haven’t you seen him?’
‘No; I have been here for the last hour.’
‘No; I've been here for the last hour.’
Just then Jory, who had remained silent, nudged Sandoz, and directed his attention to a girl seated with a gentleman at a table at the back of the room. There were only two other customers present, two sergeants, who were playing cards. The girl was almost a child, one of those young Parisian hussies who are as lank as ever at eighteen. She suggested a frizzy poodle—with the shower of fair little locks that fell over her dainty little nose, and her large smiling mouth, set between rosy cheeks. She was turning over the leaves of an illustrated paper, while the gentleman accompanying her gravely sipped a glass of Madeira; but every other minute she darted gay glances from over the newspaper towards the band of artists.
Just then, Jory, who had been quiet, nudged Sandoz and pointed out a girl sitting with a guy at a table in the back of the room. There were only two other customers, two sergeants who were playing cards. The girl looked almost like a child, one of those young Parisian flirts who still looked skinny at eighteen. She reminded him of a frizzy poodle—with her cascade of light curls falling over her delicate little nose and her large, smiling mouth framed by rosy cheeks. She was flipping through the pages of a magazine while the guy with her drank a glass of Madeira seriously; but every minute or so, she shot playful glances from behind the newspaper towards the group of artists.
‘Pretty, isn’t she?’ whispered Jory. ‘Who is she staring at? Why, she’s looking at me.’
‘She’s really pretty, isn’t she?’ Jory whispered. ‘Who is she looking at? Oh wait, she’s looking at me.’
But Fagerolles suddenly broke in: ‘I say, no nonsense. Don’t imagine that I have been here for the last hour merely waiting for you.’
But Fagerolles suddenly interrupted: ‘Look, no nonsense. Don’t think I’ve been here for the last hour just waiting for you.’
The others laughed; and lowering his voice he told them about the girl, who was named Irma Bécot. She was the daughter of a grocer in the Rue Montorgueil, and had been to school in the neighbourhood till she was sixteen, writing her exercises between two bags of lentils, and finishing off her education on her father’s doorstep, lolling about on the pavement, amidst the jostling of the throng, and learning all about life from the everlasting tittle-tattle of the cooks, who retailed all the scandal of the neighbourhood while waiting for five sous’ worth of Gruyère cheese to be served them. Her mother having died, her father himself had begun to lead rather a gay life, in such wise that the whole of the grocery stores—tea, coffee, dried vegetables, and jars and drawers of sweetstuff—were gradually devoured. Irma was still going to school, when, one day, the place was sold up. Her father died of a fit of apoplexy, and Irma sought refuge with a poor aunt, who gave her more kicks than halfpence, with the result that she ended by running away, and taking her flight through all the dancing-places of Montmartre and Batignolles.
The others laughed, and lowering his voice, he told them about the girl named Irma Bécot. She was the daughter of a grocer on Rue Montorgueil and had gone to school in the neighborhood until she was sixteen, doing her homework between two bags of lentils and finishing her lessons on her father’s doorstep, lounging on the pavement, surrounded by the bustling crowd, learning about life from the constant gossip of the cooks who shared all the neighborhood scandals while waiting for their five-sou servings of Gruyère cheese. After her mother passed away, her father started living a rather carefree life, which resulted in the grocery store—tea, coffee, dried vegetables, and jars of sweets—becoming gradually depleted. Irma was still in school when, one day, the store was auctioned off. Her father died from a stroke, and Irma sought refuge with a poor aunt, who treated her poorly, leading her to run away and explore all the dance venues of Montmartre and Batignolles.
Claude listened to the story with his usual air of contempt for women. Suddenly, however, as the gentleman rose and went out after whispering in her ear, Irma Bécot, after watching him disappear, bounded from her seat with the impulsiveness of a school girl, in order to join Fagerolles, beside whom she made herself quite at home, giving him a smacking kiss, and drinking out of his glass. And she smiled at the others in a very engaging manner, for she was partial to artists, and regretted that they were generally so miserably poor. As Jory was smoking, she took his cigarette out of his mouth and set it in her own, but without pausing in her chatter, which suggested that of a saucy magpie.
Claude listened to the story with his usual disdain for women. However, when the man stood up and left after whispering in her ear, Irma Bécot, after watching him walk away, jumped out of her seat with the enthusiasm of a schoolgirl to join Fagerolles, where she made herself quite comfortable, gave him a big kiss, and drank from his glass. She smiled at the others in a very charming way because she had a soft spot for artists and wished they weren't usually so broke. While Jory was smoking, she took the cigarette out of his mouth and put it in her own, all without stopping her chatter, which was full of the cheekiness of a lively magpie.
‘You are all painters, aren’t you? How amusing! But why do those three look as if they were sulking. Just laugh a bit, or I shall make you, you’ll see!’
‘You’re all painters, right? How funny! But why do those three look like they’re sulking? Just laugh a little, or I’ll make you, you’ll see!’
As a matter of fact, Sandoz, Claude, and Mahoudeau, quite taken aback, were watching her most gravely. She herself remained listening, and, on hearing her companion come back, she hastily gave Fagerolles an appointment for the morrow. Then, after replacing the cigarette between Jory’s lips, she strode off with her arms raised, and making a very comical grimace; in such wise that when the gentleman reappeared, looking sedate and somewhat pale, he found her in her former seat, still looking at the same engraving in the newspaper. The whole scene had been acted so quickly, and with such jaunty drollery, that the two sergeants who sat nearby, good-natured fellows both of them, almost died of laughter as they shuffled their cards afresh.
Actually, Sandoz, Claude, and Mahoudeau were quite surprised, watching her very seriously. She kept listening and, upon hearing her friend return, quickly set up a meeting with Fagerolles for the next day. After placing the cigarette back between Jory’s lips, she walked away with her arms raised, making a funny face. When the gentleman came back, looking calm and a bit pale, he found her in her original seat, still gazing at the same newspaper engraving. The whole scene happened so fast and with such playful humor that the two sergeants nearby, who were both good-natured, nearly burst out laughing as they shuffled their cards again.
In fact, Irma had taken them all by storm. Sandoz declared that her name of Bécot was very well suited for a novel; Claude asked whether she would consent to pose for a sketch; while Mahoudeau already pictured her as a Paris gamin, a statuette that would be sure to sell. She soon went off, however, and behind the gentleman’s back she wafted kisses to the whole party, a shower of kisses which quite upset the impressionable Jory.
In fact, Irma had completely captivated everyone. Sandoz said that her name, Bécot, was perfect for a novel; Claude asked if she would be willing to pose for a sketch; and Mahoudeau was already imagining her as a Paris street kid, a figurine that would definitely sell. However, she soon left, and behind the gentleman’s back, she blew kisses to the whole group, a flurry of kisses that really flustered the sensitive Jory.
It was five o’clock, and the band ordered some more beer. Some of the usual customers had taken possession of the adjacent tables, and these philistines cast sidelong glances at the artists’ corner, glances in which contempt was curiously mingled with a kind of uneasy deference. The artists were indeed well known; a legend was becoming current respecting them. They themselves were now talking on common-place subjects: about the heat, the difficulty of finding room in the omnibus to the Odeon, and the discovery of a wine-shop where real meat was obtainable. One of them wanted to start a discussion about a number of idiotic pictures that had lately been hung in the Luxembourg Museum; but there was only one opinion on the subject, that the pictures were not worth their frames. Thereupon they left off conversing; they smoked, merely exchanging a word or a significant smile now and then.
It was five o’clock, and the band ordered more beer. Some of the regular customers had taken over the nearby tables, and these ordinary folks shot sideways looks at the artists’ corner, looks that combined contempt with a sort of awkward respect. The artists were indeed well-known; a legend was starting to form about them. They were now discussing everyday topics: the heat, the struggle to find room on the bus to the Odeon, and the discovery of a wine shop where they could actually get decent meat. One of them wanted to start a debate about a bunch of ridiculous paintings recently hung in the Luxembourg Museum, but everyone agreed that the paintings weren’t worth their frames. They then stopped talking; they smoked, only exchanging an occasional word or a meaningful smile.
‘Well,’ asked Claude at last, ‘are we going to wait for Gagnière?’
‘Well,’ Claude finally asked, ‘are we going to wait for Gagnière?’
At this there was a protest. Gagnière was a bore. Besides, he would turn up as soon as he smelt the soup.
At this, there were complaints. Gagnière was annoying. Plus, he would show up as soon as he caught a whiff of the soup.
‘Let’s be off, then,’ said Sandoz. ‘There’s a leg of mutton this evening, so let’s try to be punctual.’
‘Let’s get going, then,’ said Sandoz. ‘There’s a leg of mutton for dinner, so let’s try to be on time.’
Each paid his score, and they all went out. Their departure threw the café into a state of emotion. Some young fellows, painters, no doubt, whispered together as they pointed at Claude, much in the same manner as if he were the redoubtable chieftain of a horde of savages. Jory’s famous article was producing its effect; the very public was becoming his accomplice, and of itself was soon to found that school of the open air, which the band had so far only joked about. As they gaily said, the Café Baudequin was not aware of the honour they had done it on the day when they selected it to be the cradle of a revolution.
Each paid their bill, and they all headed out. Their exit stirred up the café. A few young guys, likely painters, whispered to each other while pointing at Claude, much like he was some fierce leader of a group of wild men. Jory’s famous article was having its impact; the public was becoming his ally, and soon enough, they would establish that outdoor art movement that the group had only joked about until now. As they cheerfully remarked, the Café Baudequin was unaware of the honor they had bestowed upon it when they chose it as the birthplace of a revolution.
Fagerolles having reinforced the group, they now numbered five, and slowly they took their way across Paris, with their tranquil look of victory. The more numerous they were, the more did they stretch across the pavement, and carry away on their heels the burning life of the streets. When they had gone down the Rue de Clichy, they went straight along the Rue de la Chaussée d’Antin, turned towards the Rue de Richelieu, crossed the Seine by the Pont des Arts, so as to fling their gibes at the Institute, and finally reached the Luxembourg by way of the Rue de Seine, where a poster, printed in three colours, the garish announcement of a travelling circus, made them all shout with admiration. Evening was coming on; the stream of wayfarers flowed more slowly; the tired city was awaiting the shadows of night, ready to yield to the first comer who might be strong enough to take her.
Fagerolles had strengthened the group, so they now had five members, and they slowly made their way across Paris, looking calm and victorious. The more of them there were, the more they took up space on the sidewalk, and they carried the vibrant energy of the streets with them. After passing down Rue de Clichy, they continued straight along Rue de la Chaussée d’Antin, turned toward Rue de Richelieu, crossed the Seine on the Pont des Arts to throw their taunts at the Institute, and finally arrived at the Luxembourg via Rue de Seine, where a brightly colored poster advertising a traveling circus made them all cheer with excitement. Evening was approaching; the flow of pedestrians slowed down; the tired city was waiting for the shadows of night, ready to give in to whoever might be strong enough to claim her.
On reaching the Rue d’Enfer, when Sandoz had ushered his four friends into his own apartments, he once more vanished into his mother’s room. He remained there for a few moments, and then came out without saying a word, but with the tender, gentle smile habitual to him on such occasions. And immediately afterwards a terrible hubbub, of laughter, argument, and mere shouting, arose in his little flat. Sandoz himself set the example, all the while assisting the charwoman, who burst into bitter language because it was half-past seven, and her leg of mutton was drying up. The five companions, seated at table, were already swallowing their soup, a very good onion soup, when a new comer suddenly appeared.
When they reached Rue d’Enfer, Sandoz led his four friends into his apartment and disappeared into his mother’s room again. He stayed in there for a few moments before coming out silently, wearing the kind and gentle smile he always had on such occasions. Right after, a loud commotion of laughter, arguments, and shouting erupted in his small place. Sandoz was leading the charge, all while helping the cleaning lady, who was angrily complaining because it was already half-past seven and her leg of mutton was drying out. The five friends, sitting at the table, were already enjoying their soup, a really good onion soup, when a newcomer suddenly showed up.
‘Hallo! here’s Gagnière,’ was the vociferous chorus.
‘Hello! Here’s Gagnière,’ was the loud chorus.
Gagnière, short, slight, and vague looking, with a doll-like startled face, set off by a fair curly beard, stood for a moment on the threshold blinking his green eyes. He belonged to Melun, where his well-to-do parents, who were both dead, had left him two houses; and he had learnt painting, unassisted, in the forest of Fontainebleau. His landscapes were at least conscientiously painted, excellent in intention; but his real passion was music, a madness for music, a cerebral bonfire which set him on a level with the wildest of the band.
Gagnière, short, slender, and somewhat vague in appearance, with a doll-like startled expression highlighted by a light curly beard, stood for a moment at the door blinking his green eyes. He was from Melun, where his wealthy parents, who were both deceased, had left him two houses; he had taught himself to paint in the forest of Fontainebleau. His landscapes were at least painted with care, excellent in intent; but his true passion was music, a fervor for music, a mental blaze that placed him alongside the wildest of the group.
‘Am I in the way?’ he gently asked.
“Am I in the way?” he asked softly.
‘Not at all; come in!’ shouted Sandoz.
"Not at all; come in!" shouted Sandoz.
The charwoman was already laying an extra knife and fork.
The cleaning lady was already setting out an extra knife and fork.
‘Suppose she lays a place for Dubuche, while she is about it,’ said Claude. ‘He told me he would perhaps come.’
‘Let’s say she sets a place for Dubuche while she’s at it,’ said Claude. ‘He mentioned he might come.’
But they were all down upon Dubuche, who frequented women in society. Jory said that he had seen him in a carriage with an old lady and her daughter, whose parasols he was holding on his knees.
But they were all criticizing Dubuche, who often socialized with women. Jory mentioned that he had spotted him in a carriage with an older woman and her daughter, whose parasols he was balancing on his knees.
‘Where have you come from to be so late?’ asked Fagerolles of Gagnière.
‘Where have you been to be so late?’ asked Fagerolles of Gagnière.
The latter, who was about to swallow his first spoonful of soup, set it in his plate again.
The latter, who was about to take his first spoonful of soup, put it back on his plate.
‘I was in the Rue de Lancry—you know, where they have chamber music. Oh! my boy, some of Schumann’s machines! You haven’t an idea of them! They clutch hold of you at the back of your head just as if somebody were breathing down your back. Yes, yes, it’s something much more immaterial than a kiss, just a whiff of breath. ‘Pon my honour, a fellow feels as if he were going to die.’
‘I was on Rue de Lancry—you know, where they have chamber music. Oh! my man, some of Schumann’s pieces! You wouldn’t believe them! They grab you right at the back of your head, like someone’s breathing down your neck. Yes, yes, it’s something way more ethereal than a kiss, just a hint of breath. Honestly, it feels like you’re about to die.’
His eyes were moistening and he turned pale, as if experiencing some over-acute enjoyment.
His eyes were getting teary and he turned pale, as if feeling some intense pleasure.
‘Eat your soup,’ said Mahoudeau; ‘you’ll tell us all about it afterwards.’
‘Eat your soup,’ Mahoudeau said; ‘you can tell us all about it later.’
The skate was served, and they had the vinegar bottle put on the table to improve the flavour of the black butter, which seemed rather insipid. They ate with a will, and the hunks of bread swiftly disappeared. There was nothing refined about the repast, and the wine was mere common stuff, which they watered considerably from a feeling of delicacy, in order to lessen their host’s expenses. They had just saluted the leg of mutton with a hurrah, and the host had begun to carve it, when the door opened anew. But this time there were furious protests.
The skate was served, and they had the vinegar bottle placed on the table to enhance the flavor of the black butter, which seemed pretty bland. They ate eagerly, and the chunks of bread quickly disappeared. There was nothing fancy about the meal, and the wine was just ordinary stuff, which they watered down quite a bit out of consideration, to reduce their host’s expenses. They had just cheered for the leg of mutton with a hooray, and the host had started to carve it, when the door opened again. But this time there were angry objections.
‘No, no, not another soul! Turn him out, turn him out.’
‘No, no, not another person! Get him out, get him out.’
Dubuche, out of breath with having run, bewildered at finding himself amidst such howling, thrust his fat, pallid face forward, whilst stammering explanations.
Dubuche, out of breath from running, confused by the loud howling around him, pushed his round, pale face forward while stammering out explanations.
‘Really, now, I assure you it was the fault of the omnibuses. I had to wait for five of them in the Champs Elysées.’
‘Honestly, I promise you it was the buses' fault. I had to wait for five of them on the Champs Elysées.’
‘No, no, he’s lying!—Let him go, he sha’n’t have any of that mutton. Turn him out, turn him out!’
‘No, no, he’s lying!—Let him go, he’s not getting any of that mutton. Kick him out, kick him out!’
All the same, he ended by coming in, and it was then noticed that he was stylishly attired, all in black, trousers and frock-coat alike, and cravated and booted in the stiff ceremonious fashion of some respectable member of the middle classes going out to dinner.
All the same, he finally came in, and it was then noticed that he was dressed stylishly, all in black, with trousers and a frock coat, and wearing a cravat and boots in the stiff formal style of a respectable middle-class person heading out to dinner.
‘Hallo! he has missed his invitation,’ chaffed Fagerolles. ‘Don’t you see that his fine ladies didn’t ask him to stay to dinner, and so now he’s come to gobble up our leg of mutton, as he doesn’t know where else to go?’
‘Hey! He's missed his invitation,’ joked Fagerolles. ‘Can’t you tell that his fancy ladies didn’t invite him to stay for dinner, so now he’s come to devour our leg of mutton since he doesn't have anywhere else to go?’
At this Dubuche turned red, and stammered: ‘Oh! what an idea! How ill-natured you are! And, besides, just attend to your own business.’
At this, Dubuche blushed and stammered, “Oh! What a thought! You’re so mean! And besides, just mind your own business.”
Sandoz and Claude, seated next to each other, smiled, and the former, beckoning to Dubuche, said to him: ‘Lay your own place, bring a plate and a glass, and sit between us—like that, they’ll leave you alone.’
Sandoz and Claude, sitting next to each other, smiled, and Sandoz called to Dubuche, saying to him: ‘Set up your own spot, grab a plate and a glass, and sit between us—this way, they’ll leave you alone.’
However, the chaff continued all the time that the mutton was being eaten. When the charwoman had brought Dubuche a plate of soup and a piece of skate, he himself fell in with the jokes good-naturedly. He pretended to be famished, greedily mopped out his plate, and related a story about a mother having refused him her daughter because he was an architect. The end of the dinner thus became very boisterous; they all rattled on together. The only dessert, a piece of Brie cheese, met with enormous success. Not a scrap of it was left, and the bread almost ran short. The wine did run short, so they each swallowed a clear draught of water, smacking their lips the while amidst great laughter. And, with faces beaming, and well-filled paunches, they passed into the bedroom with the supreme content of folks who have fared very sumptuously indeed.
However, the chatter continued while the mutton was being eaten. When the charwoman brought Dubuche a bowl of soup and a piece of skate, he joined in the jokes happily. He pretended to be starving, eagerly cleaned his plate, and told a story about a mother who refused to let him marry her daughter because he was an architect. By the end of dinner, things got pretty lively; everyone was talking and laughing together. The only dessert, a piece of Brie cheese, was a huge hit. Not a crumb was left, and they nearly ran out of bread. They did run out of wine, so everyone took a big gulp of water, smacking their lips amidst the laughter. With smiles on their faces and full bellies, they headed to the bedroom, feeling completely satisfied after such a lavish meal.
Those were Sandoz’s jolly evenings. Even at the times when he was hard up he had always had some boiled beef and broth to share with his comrades. He felt delighted at having a number of them around him, all friends, inspired by the same ideas. Though he was of their own age, he beamed with fatherly feelings and satisfied good-nature when he saw them in his rooms, around him, hand in hand, and intoxicated with hope. As he had but two rooms, the bedroom did duty as a drawing-room, and became as much theirs as his. For lack of sufficient chairs, two or three had to seat themselves on the bed. And on those warm summer evenings the window remained wide open to let in the air. From it two black silhouettes were to be seen rising above the houses, against the clear sky—the tower of St. Jacques du Haut-Pas and the tree of the Deaf and Dumb Asylum. When money was plentiful there was beer. Every one brought his own tobacco, the room soon became full of smoke, and without seeing each other they ended by conversing far into the night, amidst the deep mournful silence of that deserted district.
Those were Sandoz’s fun evenings. Even when he was hard up, he always managed to have some boiled beef and broth to share with his friends. He felt happy to have several of them around him, all friends, inspired by the same ideas. Though he was their age, he radiated a fatherly warmth and a sense of fulfillment when he saw them in his rooms, gathered together, hand in hand, filled with hope. Since he only had two rooms, the bedroom served as a living room and became as much theirs as his. Due to a lack of enough chairs, two or three had to sit on the bed. And on those warm summer nights, the window stayed wide open to let in the fresh air. From it, two black silhouettes could be seen rising above the houses against the clear sky—the tower of St. Jacques du Haut-Pas and the tree of the Deaf and Dumb Asylum. When money was flowing, there was beer. Everyone brought their own tobacco, the room quickly filled with smoke, and without seeing each other, they ended up chatting late into the night, surrounded by the deep, mournful silence of that deserted area.
On that particular evening, at about nine o’clock, the charwoman came in.
On that evening, around nine o’clock, the cleaning lady came in.
‘Monsieur, I have done. Can I go?’
‘Sir, I'm finished. Can I leave?’
‘Yes, go to bed. You have left the kettle on the fire, haven’t you? I’ll make the tea myself.’
‘Yes, go to bed. You left the kettle on the stove, didn’t you? I’ll make the tea myself.’
Sandoz had risen. He went off at the heels of the charwoman, and only returned a quarter of an hour afterwards. He had no doubt been to kiss his mother, whom he tucked up every night before she dozed off.
Sandoz had gotten up. He followed the cleaning lady out and only came back about fifteen minutes later. He had probably gone to kiss his mom, whom he tucked in every night before she fell asleep.
Meanwhile the voices had risen to a high pitch again. Fagerolles was telling a story.
Meanwhile, the voices had gone up to a high pitch again. Fagerolles was telling a story.
‘Yes, old fellow; at the School they even correct Nature herself. The other day Mazel comes up to me and says: “Those two arms don’t correspond”; whereupon I reply: “Look for yourself, monsieur—the model’s are like that.” It was little Flore Beauchamp, you know. “Well,” Mazel furiously replies, “if she has them like that, it’s very wrong of her.”’
‘Yeah, my friend; at the School, they even change Nature itself. The other day, Mazel comes up to me and says: “Those two arms don’t match”; to which I reply: “Just take a look, sir—the model’s are like that.” It was little Flore Beauchamp, you know. “Well,” Mazel angrily responds, “if she has them like that, that’s very wrong of her.”’
They almost all shrieked, especially Claude, to whom Fagerolles told the story by way of paying court. For some time previously the younger artist had yielded to the elder’s influence; and although he continued to paint with purely tricky skill, he no longer talked of anything but substantial, thickly-painted work, of bits of nature thrown on to canvas, palpitating with life, such as they really were. This did not prevent him, though, from elsewhere chaffing the adepts of the open-air school, whom he accused of impasting with a kitchen ladle.
They all screamed, especially Claude, to whom Fagerolles told the story to win him over. For a while, the younger artist had been influenced by the older one; and even though he still painted with skillful tricks, he only talked about solid, heavily-painted work, capturing bits of nature on canvas, full of life, just like they actually were. However, this didn’t stop him from teasing the followers of the plein air school, whom he accused of slopping paint on with a kitchen ladle.
Dubuche, who had not laughed, his sense of rectitude being offended, made so bold as to reply:
Dubuche, who hadn’t laughed, feeling his sense of fairness was offended, took the liberty to respond:
‘Why do you stop at the School if you think you are being brutified there? It’s simple enough, one goes away—Oh, I know you are all against me, because I defend the School. But, you see, my idea is that, when a fellow wants to carry on a trade, it is not a bad thing for him to begin by learning it.’
‘Why do you stay at the School if you feel like it's making you worse? It’s pretty simple; you just leave—Oh, I know you’re all against me because I stand up for the School. But, you see, my belief is that when someone wants to pursue a trade, starting by learning it isn’t a bad idea.’
Ferocious shouts arose at this, and Claude had need of all his authority to secure a hearing.
Ferocious shouts erupted at this, and Claude needed all his authority to get a chance to speak.
‘He is right. One must learn one’s trade. But it won’t do to learn it under the ferule of professors who want to cram their own views forcibly into your nut. That Mazel is a perfect idiot!’
‘He’s right. You have to learn your craft. But you can’t learn it under the thumb of professors who want to shove their own opinions down your throat. That Mazel is a complete fool!’
He flung himself backward on the bed, on which he had been sitting, and with his eyes raised to the ceiling, he went on, in an excited tone:
He threw himself back on the bed, where he had been sitting, and with his eyes staring up at the ceiling, he continued, in an excited tone:
‘Ah! life! life! to feel it and portray it in its reality, to love it for itself, to behold in it the only real, lasting, and changing beauty, without any idiotic idea of ennobling it by mutilation. To understand that all so-called ugliness is nothing but the mark of individual character, to create real men and endow them with life—yes, that’s the only way to become a god!’
‘Ah! life! life! to experience it and show it as it truly is, to love it for what it is, to see it as the only real, enduring, and evolving beauty, without any foolish notion of improving it by altering it. To recognize that all so-called ugliness is just a reflection of individual character, to create real people and give them life—yes, that’s the only way to become a god!’
His faith was coming back to him, the march across Paris had spurred him on once more; he was again seized by his passion for living flesh. They listened to him in silence. He made a wild gesture, then calmed down.
His faith was returning to him; the march across Paris had inspired him once again. He was once more filled with his passion for living flesh. They listened to him in silence. He made a wild gesture, then settled down.
‘No doubt every one has his own ideas; but the annoyance is that at the Institute they are even more intolerant than we are. The hanging committee of the Salon is in their hands. I am sure that that idiot Mazel will refuse my picture.’
‘No doubt everyone has their own ideas; but the frustrating part is that at the Institute, they're even more intolerant than we are. The hanging committee of the Salon is under their control. I'm sure that idiot Mazel will reject my painting.’
Thereupon they all broke out into imprecations, for this question of the hanging committee was the everlasting subject of their wrath. They demanded reforms; every one had a solution of the problem ready—from universal suffrage, applied to the election of a hanging committee, liberal in the widest sense of the word, down to unrestricted liberty, a Salon open to all exhibitors.*
Thereupon, they all started cursing because the issue of the hanging committee was the constant source of their anger. They demanded changes; everyone had a solution ready—from universal suffrage for electing a hanging committee, broadly defined, to complete freedom with a Salon open to all exhibitors.*
* The reader will bear in mind that all these complaints made by Claude and his friends apply to the old Salons, as organized under Government control, at the time of the Second Empire.—ED.
* The reader should remember that all these complaints from Claude and his friends relate to the old Salons, which were organized under government control during the Second Empire.—ED.
While the others went on discussing the subject, Gagnière drew Mahoudeau to the open window, where, in a low voice, his eyes the while staring into space, he murmured:
While the others continued discussing the topic, Gagnière pulled Mahoudeau to the open window, where, in a quiet voice, his eyes fixed on the distance, he whispered:
‘Oh, it’s nothing at all, only four bars; a simple impression jotted down there and then. But what a deal there is in it! To me it’s first of all a landscape, dwindling away in the distance; a bit of melancholy road, with the shadow of a tree that one cannot see; and then a woman passes along, scarcely a silhouette; on she goes and you never meet her again, no, never more again.’
‘Oh, it’s nothing at all, just four bars; a simple idea noted down right then. But there’s so much in it! To me, it’s primarily a landscape, fading into the distance; a touch of a sad road, with the shadow of a tree that you can’t see; and then a woman walks by, barely a silhouette; she keeps going and you never see her again, no, never again.’
Just at that moment, however, Fagerolles exclaimed, ‘I say, Gagnière, what are you going to send to the Salon this year?’
Just then, Fagerolles shouted, "Hey, Gagnière, what are you going to submit to the Salon this year?"
Gagnière did not hear, but continued talking, enraptured, as it were.
Gagnière didn’t hear but kept talking, completely caught up in the moment.
‘In Schumann one finds everything—the infinite. And Wagner, too, whom they hissed again last Sunday!’
‘In Schumann, you find everything—the endless. And Wagner, too, who got booed again last Sunday!’
But a fresh call from Fagerolles made him start.
But a new call from Fagerolles made him jump.
‘Eh! what? What am I going to send to the Salon? A small landscape, perhaps; a little bit of the Seine. It is so difficult to decide; first of all I must feel pleased with it myself.’
‘Eh! What? What am I going to send to the Salon? A small landscape, maybe; a little piece of the Seine. It's so hard to decide; first, I have to be happy with it myself.’
He had suddenly become timid and anxious again. His artistic scruples, his conscientiousness, kept him working for months on a canvas the size of one’s hand. Following the track of the French landscape painters, those masters who were the first to conquer nature, he worried about correctness of tone, pondering and pondering over the precise value of tints, till theoretical scruples ended by making his touch heavy. And he often did not dare to chance a bright dash of colour, but painted in a greyish gloomy key which was astonishing, when one remembered his revolutionary passions.
He had suddenly become shy and anxious again. His artistic standards and sense of responsibility kept him working for months on a canvas the size of a hand. Following in the footsteps of the French landscape painters, those masters who first captured nature, he obsessed over getting the tones right, thinking and thinking about the exact value of colors, until his theoretical concerns made his brushwork heavy. Often, he didn’t dare to risk a bright splash of color and ended up painting in a dull, greyish tone, which was surprising considering his revolutionary passions.
‘For my part,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘I feel delighted at the prospect of making them squint with my woman.’
‘For my part,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘I’m thrilled at the idea of making them squint with my girl.’
Claude shrugged his shoulders. ‘Oh! you’ll get in, the sculptors have broader minds than the painters. And, besides, you know very well what you are about; you have something at your fingers’ ends that pleases. There will be plenty of pretty bits about your vintaging girl.’
Claude shrugged his shoulders. ‘Oh! You’ll get in, the sculptors have broader minds than the painters. And, besides, you know exactly what you’re doing; you have a knack for creating something appealing. There will be plenty of lovely details about your vintaging girl.’
The compliment made Mahoudeau feel serious. He posed above all for vigour of execution; he was unconscious of his real vein of talent, and despised gracefulness, though it ever invincibly sprung from his big, coarse fingers—the fingers of an untaught working-man—like a flower that obstinately sprouts from the hard soil where the wind has flung its seed.
The compliment made Mahoudeau feel serious. He mainly focused on the strength of his work; he didn’t realize his true talent and looked down on grace, even though it effortlessly emerged from his large, rough fingers—the fingers of an untrained laborer—like a flower that stubbornly grows from the tough soil where the wind has scattered its seeds.
Fagerolles, who was very cunning, had decided to send nothing, for fear of displeasing his masters; and he chaffed the Salon, calling it ‘a foul bazaar, where all the bad painting made even the good turn musty.’ In his inmost heart he was dreaming of one day securing the Rome prize, though he ridiculed it, as he did everything else.
Fagerolles, who was quite clever, decided not to send anything, worried about upsetting his superiors; he mocked the Salon, calling it "a dirty market where all the bad art made even the good stuff go stale." Deep down, he was dreaming of one day winning the Rome prize, even though he made fun of it, just like everything else.
However, Jory stationed himself in the middle of the room, holding up his glass of beer. Sipping every now and then, he declared: ‘Well, your hanging committee quite disgusts me! I say, shall I demolish it? I’ll begin bombarding it in our very next number. You’ll give me some notes, eh? and we’ll knock it to pieces. That will be fine fun.’
However, Jory stood in the middle of the room, holding up his beer. Sipping now and then, he declared: ‘Well, your hanging committee really disgusts me! Should I tear it down? I’ll start going after it in our very next issue. You’ll give me some notes, right? and we’ll tear it apart. That’ll be great fun.’
Claude was at last fully wound up, and general enthusiasm prevailed. Yes, yes, they must start a campaign. They would all be in it, and, pressing shoulder to shoulder, march to the battle together. At that moment there was not one of them who reserved his share of fame, for nothing divided them as yet; neither the profound dissemblance of their various natures, of which they themselves were ignorant, nor their rivalries, which would some day bring them into collision. Was not the success of one the success of all the others? Their youth was fermenting, they were brimming over with mutual devotion; they indulged anew in their everlasting dream of gathering into a phalanx to conquer the world, each contributing his individual effort; this one helping that one forward, and the whole band reaching fame at once in one row. Claude, as the acknowledged chief, was already sounding the victory, distributing laurels with such lyrical abundance that he overlooked himself. Fagerolles himself, gibing Parisian though he might be, believed in the necessity of forming an army; while even Jory, although he had a coarser appetite, with a deal of the provincial still about him, displayed much useful comradeship, catching various artistic phrases as they fell from his companions’ lips, and already preparing in his mind the articles which would herald the advent of the band and make them known. And Mahoudeau purposely exaggerated his intentional roughness, and clasped his hands like an ogre kneading human flesh; while Gagnière, in ecstasy, as if freed from the everlasting greyishness of his art, sought to refine sensation to the utmost limits of intelligence; and Dubuche, with his matter-of-fact convictions, threw in but a word here and there; words, however, which were like club-blows in the very midst of the fray. Then Sandoz, happy and smiling at seeing them so united, ‘all in one shirt,’ as he put it, opened another bottle of beer. He would have emptied every one in the house.
Claude was finally fully energized, and a sense of excitement filled the air. Yes, they needed to kick off a campaign. They would all participate, standing shoulder to shoulder, marching into battle together. At that moment, none of them held back their desire for recognition, as nothing divided them yet; neither the deep differences in their personalities, which they weren't aware of, nor their future rivalries that would eventually clash. Wasn't one person's success a win for everyone? Their youth was charged with energy, overflowing with camaraderie; they indulged again in their dream of coming together as a group to conquer the world, each person contributing their individual efforts; one helping another along, and the entire group achieving fame together in unison. Claude, recognized as the leader, was already proclaiming victory, handing out accolades with such enthusiasm that he overlooked himself. Even Fagerolles, despite being a sarcastic Parisian, believed in the need to form a team; and Jory, with his coarser tastes and a lot of provincial traits still in him, showed valuable teamwork by catching various artistic phrases as they fell from his friends' lips, already planning the articles that would announce the group and make them known. Mahoudeau deliberately exaggerated his rough persona, clenching his hands like an ogre kneading flesh; while Gagnière, ecstatic and seemingly freed from the dullness of his art, sought to push sensation to the very limits of understanding; and Dubuche, with his straightforward beliefs, added a word here and there; words that hit hard like club blows in the thick of it all. Then Sandoz, happy and smiling at seeing them so united, “all in one shirt,” as he said, opened another bottle of beer. He would have emptied every bottle in the place.
‘Eh?’ he cried, ‘we’re agreed, let’s stick to it. It’s really pleasant to come to an understanding among fellows who have something in their nuts, so may the thunderbolts of heaven sweep all idiots away!’
‘Huh?’ he exclaimed, ‘we’re on the same page, let’s keep it that way. It’s genuinely nice to reach an agreement with guys who have some sense, so may the lightning of the heavens blast all fools away!’
At that same moment a ring at the bell stupefied him. Amidst the sudden silence of the others, he inquired—‘Who, to the deuce, can that be—at eleven o’clock?’
At that same moment, the doorbell rang, catching him off guard. In the sudden silence of the others, he asked, "Who on earth can that be—at eleven o’clock?"
He ran to open the door, and they heard him utter a cry of delight. He was already coming back again, throwing the door wide open as he said—‘Ah! it’s very kind indeed to think of us and surprise us like this! Bongrand, gentlemen.’
He rushed to open the door, and they heard him let out a shout of joy. He was already returning, swinging the door wide open as he said, "Ah! It's really nice of you to think of us and surprise us like this! Bongrand, guys."
The great painter, whom the master of the house announced in this respectfully familiar way, entered, holding out both hands. They all eagerly rose, full of emotion, delighted with that manly, cordial handshake so willingly bestowed. Bongrand was then forty-five years old, stout, and with a very expressive face and long grey hair. He had recently become a member of the Institute, and wore the rosette of an officer of the Legion of Honour in the top button-hole of his unpretentious alpaca jacket. He was fond of young people; he liked nothing so much as to drop in from time to time and smoke a pipe among these beginners, whose enthusiasm warmed his heart.
The great painter, introduced by the master of the house in a respectfully familiar manner, walked in, extending both hands. Everyone eagerly stood up, filled with emotion, thrilled by his strong, friendly handshake that he generously offered. Bongrand was then forty-five years old, overweight, with an expressive face and long gray hair. He had recently become a member of the Institute and wore the rosette of an officer of the Legion of Honour in the top button-hole of his simple alpaca jacket. He had a fondness for young people; he loved nothing more than to drop by occasionally and smoke a pipe with these beginners, whose enthusiasm warmed his heart.
‘I am going to make the tea,’ exclaimed Sandoz.
‘I’m going to make the tea,’ Sandoz said.
When he came back from the kitchen, carrying the teapot and cups, he found Bongrand installed astride a chair, smoking his short cutty, amidst the din which had again arisen. Bongrand himself was holding forth in a stentorian voice. The grandson of a farmer of the Beauce region, the son of a man risen to the middle classes, with peasant blood in his veins, indebted for his culture to a mother of very artistic tastes, he was rich, had no need to sell his pictures, and retained many tastes and opinions of Bohemian life.
When he returned from the kitchen, balancing the teapot and cups, he saw Bongrand perched on a chair, puffing on his short pipe, amid the noise that had started up again. Bongrand was speaking loudly. The grandson of a farmer from the Beauce region and the son of a man who had climbed to the middle class, with peasant roots, he owed his education to a mother with very artistic tastes. He was wealthy, didn’t need to sell his paintings, and still held onto many of the tastes and opinions from his Bohemian lifestyle.
‘The hanging committee? Well, I’d sooner hang myself than belong to it!’ said he, with sweeping gestures. ‘Am I an executioner to kick poor devils, who often have to earn their bread, out of doors?’
‘The hanging committee? I’d rather hang myself than be a part of it!’ he exclaimed, making grand gestures. ‘Am I an executioner, tossing poor souls, who often struggle to make a living, out on the street?’
‘Still, you might render us great service by defending our pictures before the committee,’ observed Claude.
‘Still, you could really help us by defending our paintings in front of the committee,’ Claude said.
‘Oh, dear, no! I should only make matters worse for you—I don’t count; I’m nobody.’
‘Oh, no! I would just make things worse for you—I don’t matter; I’m nobody.’
There was a chorus of protestations; Fagerolles objected, in a shrill voice:
There was a loud uproar; Fagerolles protested in a high-pitched voice:
‘Well, if the painter of “The Village Wedding” does not count—’
‘Well, if the artist of “The Village Wedding” doesn’t matter—’
But Bongrand was getting angry; he had risen, his cheeks afire.
But Bongrand was getting angry; he had stood up, his cheeks burning.
‘Eh? Don’t pester me with “The Wedding”; I warn you I am getting sick of that picture. It is becoming a perfect nightmare to me ever since it has been hung in the Luxembourg Museum.’
‘Uh? Don’t bother me with “The Wedding”; I’m telling you I’m getting tired of that painting. It’s turning into a total nightmare for me ever since it was hung in the Luxembourg Museum.’
This ‘Village Wedding’—a party of wedding guests roaming through a corn-field, peasants studied from life, with an epic look of the heroes of Homer about them—had so far remained his masterpiece. The picture had brought about an evolution in art, for it had inaugurated a new formula. Coming after Delacroix, and parallel with Courbet, it was a piece of romanticism tempered by logic, with more correctness of observation, more perfection in the handling. And though it did not squarely tackle nature amidst the crudity of the open air, the new school claimed connection with it.
This ‘Village Wedding’—a party of wedding guests wandering through a cornfield, peasants observed from life, with a heroic quality reminiscent of Homer’s characters—had so far been his greatest work. The painting sparked a change in art because it introduced a new approach. Coming after Delacroix and alongside Courbet, it was a blend of romanticism and logic, featuring more accurate observation and improved technique. And while it didn't fully engage with nature amidst the rawness of the outdoors, the new movement claimed a link to it.
‘There can be nothing more beautiful,’ said Claude, ‘than the two first groups, the fiddler, and then the bride with the old peasant.’
'There can be nothing more beautiful,' Claude said, 'than the first two groups, the fiddler, and then the bride with the old farmer.'
‘And the strapping peasant girl, too,’ added Mahoudeau; the one who is turning round and beckoning! I had a great mind to take her for the model of a statue.’
‘And the strong peasant girl, too,’ added Mahoudeau; the one who is turning around and waving! I was really tempted to use her as the model for a statue.’
‘And that gust of wind among the corn,’ added Gagnière, ‘and the pretty bit of the boy and girl skylarking in the distance.’
‘And that gust of wind through the corn,’ added Gagnière, ‘and the cute sight of the boy and girl playing around in the distance.’
Bongrand sat listening with an embarrassed air, and a smile of inward suffering; and when Fagerolles asked him what he was doing just then, he answered, with a shrug of his shoulders:
Bongrand sat there, looking embarrassed and forcing a smile despite his inner discomfort; when Fagerolles asked him what he was doing at that moment, he shrugged his shoulders and replied:
‘Well, nothing; some little things. But I sha’n’t exhibit this time. I should like to find a telling subject. Ah, you fellows are happy at still being at the bottom of the hill. A man has good legs then, he feels so plucky when it’s a question of getting up. But when once he is a-top, the deuce take it! the worries begin. A real torture, fisticuffs, efforts which must be constantly renewed, lest one should slip down too quickly. Really now, one would prefer being below, for the pleasure of still having everything to do—Ah, you may laugh, but you’ll see it all for yourselves some day!’
‘Well, nothing much; just some minor things. But I’m not going to show anything this time. I’d like to find a strong topic. Ah, you guys are lucky still being at the bottom of the hill. A man has good legs then, and he feels so brave when it’s time to climb up. But once he’s at the top, good grief! the worries start. It’s a real struggle, fighting, efforts that have to be constantly renewed to avoid slipping down too quickly. Honestly, one would prefer to be below just for the pleasure of still having everything to do—Ah, you can laugh, but you’ll see it for yourselves someday!’
They were indeed laughing, thinking it a paradox, or a little piece of affectation, which they excused. To be hailed, like Bongrand, with the name of master—was that not the height of bliss? He, with his arms resting on the back of his chair, listened to them in silence, leisurely puffing his pipe, and renouncing the idea of trying to make them understand him.
They were definitely laughing, considering it a contradiction or a bit of pretension, which they let slide. Being called "master," like Bongrand, wasn’t that the ultimate happiness? He sat back in his chair, arms resting behind him, listening to them quietly, casually puffing on his pipe, and giving up on the idea of trying to make them understand him.
Meanwhile, Dubuche, who had rather domesticated tastes, helped Sandoz to hand the tea round, and the din continued. Fagerolles related a story about Daddy Malgras and a female cousin by marriage, whom the dealer offered as a model on conditions that he was given a presentment of her in oils. Then they began to talk of models. Mahoudeau waxed furious, because the really well-built female models were disappearing. It was impossible to find one with a decent figure now. Then suddenly the tumult increased again; Gagnière was being congratulated about a connoisseur whose acquaintance he had made in the Palais Royal one afternoon, while the band played, an eccentric gentleman living on a small income, who never indulged in any other extravagance than that of buying pictures. The other artists laughed and asked for the gentleman’s address. Then they fell foul of the picture dealers, dirty black-guards, who preyed on artists and starved them. It was really a pity that connoisseurs mistrusted painters to such a degree as to insist upon a middleman under the impression that they would thus make a better bargain. This question of bread and butter excited them yet more, though Claude showed magnificent contempt for it all. The artist was robbed, no doubt, but what did that matter, if he had painted a masterpiece, and had some water to drink? Jory, having again expressed some low ideas about lucre, aroused general indignation. Out with the journalist! He was asked stringent questions. Would he sell his pen? Would he not sooner chop off his wrist than write anything against his convictions? But they scarcely waited for his answer, for the excitement was on the increase; it became the superb madness of early manhood, contempt for the whole world, an absorbing passion for good work, freed from all human weaknesses, soaring in the sky like a very sun. Ah! how strenuous was their desire to lose themselves, consume themselves, in that brazier of their own kindling!
Meanwhile, Dubuche, who had more domestic tastes, helped Sandoz pass around the tea, and the noise continued. Fagerolles shared a story about Daddy Malgras and a female cousin by marriage, whom the dealer offered as a model on the condition that he received a painting of her in oils. Then they started talking about models. Mahoudeau got furious because the really well-built female models were disappearing. It was impossible to find one with a decent figure now. Then, suddenly, the uproar increased again; Gagnière was being congratulated for meeting a connoisseur in the Palais Royal one afternoon while the band played, an eccentric gentleman living on a small income who only indulged in the extravagance of buying paintings. The other artists laughed and asked for the gentleman’s address. Then they criticized the picture dealers, those dirty blackguards, who took advantage of artists and left them starving. It was really a shame that connoisseurs distrusted painters to such an extent that they insisted on using a middleman, thinking they would get a better deal. This issue of making a living excited them even more, though Claude showed great disdain for it all. The artist was being robbed, no doubt, but what did that matter if he had painted a masterpiece and had some water to drink? Jory, having expressed some low thoughts about money, stirred up general outrage. Get rid of the journalist! Stringent questions were thrown at him. Would he sell his pen? Would he not rather chop off his wrist than write anything against his beliefs? But they barely waited for his answer, as the excitement continued to grow; it became the magnificent madness of early adulthood, a contempt for the whole world, an all-consuming passion for great work, free from all human weaknesses, soaring in the sky like a sun. Ah! how intense was their desire to lose themselves, to burn away in that fire of their own making!
Bongrand, who had not stirred the while, made a vague gesture of suffering at the sight of that boundless confidence, that boisterous joy at the prospect of attack. He forgot the hundred paintings which had brought him his glory, he was thinking of the work which he had left roughed out on his easel now. Taking his cutty from between his lips, he murmured, his eyes glistening with kindliness, ‘Oh, youth, youth!’
Bongrand, who had remained still the whole time, made a vague gesture of discomfort at the sight of that boundless confidence and lively excitement at the idea of an attack. He forgot the hundred paintings that had brought him fame; instead, he was thinking about the work he had left roughly done on his easel. Taking his pipe out of his mouth, he murmured, his eyes shining with warmth, ‘Oh, youth, youth!’
Until two in the morning, Sandoz, who seemed ubiquitous, kept on pouring fresh supplies of hot water into the teapot. From the neighbourhood, now asleep, one now only heard the miawing of an amorous tabby. They all talked at random, intoxicated by their own words, hoarse with shouting, their eyes scorched, and when at last they made up their minds to go, Sandoz took the lamp to show them a light over the banisters, saying very softly:
Until two in the morning, Sandoz, who seemed to be everywhere, kept pouring fresh hot water into the teapot. From the now-sleeping neighborhood, all you could hear was the meowing of a lovestruck tabby. They all chatted aimlessly, soaked in their own words, hoarse from shouting, their eyes tired, and when they finally decided to leave, Sandoz took the lamp to guide them over the banisters, saying very softly:
‘Don’t make a noise, my mother is asleep.’
‘Don’t make any noise, my mom is sleeping.’
The hushed tread of their boots on the stairs died away at last, and deep silence fell upon the house.
The quiet footsteps of their boots on the stairs finally faded, and a heavy silence settled over the house.
It struck four. Claude, who had accompanied Bongrand, still went on talking to him in the deserted streets. He did not want to go to bed; he was waiting for daylight, with impatient fury, so that he might set to work at his picture again. This time he felt certain of painting a masterpiece, exalted as he was by that happy day of good-fellowship, his mind pregnant with a world of things. He had discovered at last what painting meant, and he pictured himself re-entering his studio as one returns into the presence of a woman one adores, his heart throbbing violently, regretting even this one day’s absence, which seemed to him endless desertion. And he would go straight to his canvas, and realise his dream in one sitting. However, at every dozen steps or so, amidst the flickering light of the gaslamps, Bongrand caught him by a button of his coat, to repeat to him that, after all, painting was an accursed trade. Sharp as he, Bongrand, was supposed to be, he did not understand it yet. At each new work he undertook, he felt as if he were making a debut; it was enough to make one smash one’s head against the wall. The sky was now brightening, some market gardeners’ carts began rolling down towards the central markets; and the pair continued chattering, each talking for himself, in a loud voice, beneath the paling stars.
It struck four. Claude, who had accompanied Bongrand, kept talking to him in the empty streets. He didn’t want to go to bed; he was impatiently waiting for daylight so he could get back to work on his painting. This time, he was confident he could create a masterpiece, lifted by the joy of that day filled with camaraderie, his mind buzzing with ideas. He finally understood what painting was all about, and he imagined walking back into his studio like someone returning to the embrace of someone they adore, his heart racing, already missing that day spent away, which felt like an endless absence. He planned to go straight to his canvas and bring his dream to life in one sitting. However, every dozen steps or so, in the flickering light of the gas lamps, Bongrand would grab him by a button on his coat to remind him that, after all, painting was a cursed profession. Despite being sharp, Bongrand still didn’t get it. With each new project he took on, he felt like he was starting from scratch; it was enough to make anyone want to bang their head against a wall. The sky was beginning to lighten, and some market gardeners’ carts were rolling toward the central markets, while the two of them continued chatting away, each speaking loudly, beneath the fading stars.
IV
SIX weeks later, Claude was painting one morning amidst a flood of sunshine that streamed through the large window of his studio. Constant rain had made the middle of August very dull, but his courage for work returned with the blue sky. His great picture did not make much progress, albeit he worked at it throughout long, silent mornings, like the obstinate, pugnacious fellow he was.
SIX weeks later, Claude was painting one morning in a flood of sunshine streaming through the large window of his studio. Constant rain had made mid-August pretty dreary, but his motivation to work came back with the clear blue sky. His big painting didn’t make much progress, even though he worked on it during long, quiet mornings, like the stubborn, combative guy he was.
All at once there came a knock at his door. He thought that Madame Joseph, the doorkeeper, was bringing up his lunch, and as the key was always in the door, he simply called: ‘Come in!’
All of a sudden, there was a knock at his door. He assumed that Madame Joseph, the doorkeeper, was delivering his lunch, and since the key was always in the door, he just called out, ‘Come in!’
The door had opened; there was a slight rustle, and then all became still. He went on painting without even turning his head. But the quivering silence, and the consciousness of some vague gentle breathing near him, at last made him fidgety. He looked up, and felt amazed; a woman stood there clad in a light gown, her features half-hidden by a white veil, and he did not know her, and she was carrying a bunch of roses, which completed his bewilderment.
The door swung open; there was a soft rustle, and then everything went silent. He kept painting without turning his head. But the trembling silence and the awareness of some gentle breathing nearby eventually made him restless. He looked up and was surprised; a woman stood there in a light dress, her face partially covered by a white veil, and he didn’t recognize her. She was holding a bouquet of roses, which only added to his confusion.
All at once he recognised her.
All of a sudden, he recognized her.
‘You, mademoiselle? Well, I certainly didn’t expect you!’
‘You, miss? Well, I definitely didn’t expect you!’
It was Christine. He had been unable to restrain that somewhat unamiable exclamation, which was a cry from the heart itself. At first he had certainly thought of her; then, as the days went by for nearly a couple of months without sign of life from her, she had become for him merely a fleeting, regretted vision, a charming silhouette which had melted away in space, and would never be seen again.
It was Christine. He had been unable to hold back that somewhat unfriendly exclamation, which came straight from the heart. At first, he had definitely been thinking of her; then, as the days turned into nearly two months with no sign of life from her, she had become just a brief, regrettable memory, a charming figure that had faded away into nothingness and would never be seen again.
‘Yes, monsieur, it’s I. I wished to come. I thought it was wrong not to come and thank you—’
‘Yes, sir, it's me. I wanted to come. I felt it was wrong not to come and thank you—’
She blushed and stammered, at a loss for words. She was out of breath, no doubt through climbing the stairs, for her heart was beating fast. What! was this long-debated visit out of place after all? It had ended by seeming quite natural to her. The worst was that, in passing along the quay, she had bought that bunch of roses with the delicate intention of thereby showing her gratitude to the young fellow, and the flowers now dreadfully embarrassed her. How was she to give them to him? What would he think of her? The impropriety of the whole proceeding had only struck her as she opened the door.
She blushed and stumbled over her words, completely at a loss. She was out of breath, probably from climbing the stairs, because her heart was racing. What! Was this long-discussed visit inappropriate after all? It had started to feel perfectly natural to her. The worst part was that, while walking along the quay, she had bought that bunch of roses with the genuine intention of showing her gratitude to the young man, and now the flowers made her feel incredibly awkward. How was she supposed to give them to him? What would he think of her? The awkwardness of the whole situation only hit her as she opened the door.
But Claude, more embarrassed still, resorted to exaggerated politeness. He had thrown aside his palette and was turning the studio upside down in order to clear a chair.
But Claude, feeling even more awkward, went for over-the-top politeness. He had tossed aside his palette and was turning the studio upside down to clear off a chair.
‘Pray be seated, mademoiselle. This is really a surprise. You are too kind.’
‘Please have a seat, miss. This is truly a surprise. You’re very kind.’
Once seated, Christine recovered her equanimity. He looked so droll with his wild sweeping gestures, and she felt so conscious of his shyness that she began to smile, and bravely held out the bunch of roses.
Once she was seated, Christine regained her composure. He looked so funny with his wild sweeping gestures, and she was so aware of his shyness that she started to smile and confidently offered him the bunch of roses.
‘Look here; I wished to show you that I am not ungrateful.’
‘Look, I wanted to show you that I'm not ungrateful.’
At first he said nothing, but stood staring at her, thunderstruck. When he saw, though, that she was not making fun of him, he shook both her hands, with almost sufficient energy to dislocate them. Then he at once put the flowers in his water-jug, repeating:
At first, he didn't say anything but just stared at her, shocked. But when he realized she wasn't teasing him, he grabbed both her hands with enough force to almost dislocate them. Then, he immediately put the flowers in his water jug, repeating:
‘Ah! now you are a good fellow, you really are. This is the first time I pay that compliment to a woman, honour bright.’
‘Ah! now you're a good person, you really are. This is the first time I’ve given that compliment to a woman, no joke.’
He came back to her, and, looking straight into her eyes, he asked:
He returned to her, and, looking directly into her eyes, he asked:
‘Then you have not altogether forgotten me?’
‘So you haven’t completely forgotten about me?’
‘You see that I have not,’ she replied, laughing.
‘You can see that I haven’t,’ she said with a laugh.
‘Why, then, did you wait two months before coming to see me?’
‘Why did you wait two months before coming to see me?’
Again she blushed. The falsehood she was about to tell revived her embarrassment for a moment.
Again she blushed. The lie she was about to tell brought back her embarrassment for a moment.
‘But you know that I am not my own mistress,’ she said. ‘Oh, Madame Vanzade is very kind to me, only she is a great invalid, and never leaves the house. But she grew anxious as to my health and compelled me to go out to breathe a little fresh air.’
‘But you know that I’m not in charge of my own life,’ she said. ‘Oh, Madame Vanzade is really nice to me, but she’s very unwell and never leaves the house. However, she became worried about my health and forced me to go out for some fresh air.’
She did not allude to the shame which she had felt during the first few days after her adventure on the Quai de Bourbon. Finding herself in safety, beneath the old lady’s roof, the recollection of the night she had spent in Claude’s room had filled her with remorse; but she fancied at last that she had succeeded in dismissing the matter from her mind. It was no longer anything but a bad dream, which grew more indistinct each day. Then, how it was she could not tell, but amidst the profound quietude of her existence, the image of that young man who had befriended her had returned to her once more, becoming more and more precise, till at last it occupied her daily thoughts. Why should she forget him? She had nothing to reproach him with; on the contrary, she felt she was his debtor. The thought of seeing him again, dismissed at first, struggled against later on, at last became an all-absorbing craving. Each evening the temptation to go and see him came strong upon her in the solitude of her own room. She experienced an uncomfortable irritating feeling, a vague desire which she could not define, and only calmed down somewhat on ascribing this troubled state of mind to a wish to evince her gratitude. She was so utterly alone, she felt so stifled in that sleepy abode, the exuberance of youth seethed so strongly within her, her heart craved so desperately for friendship!
She didn’t mention the shame she felt during the first few days after her experience on the Quai de Bourbon. Now safe under the old woman’s roof, recalling the night spent in Claude’s room filled her with regret, but she thought she had finally managed to push it out of her mind. It had become just a bad dream, growing fainter each day. Then, for some reason, in the deep calm of her life, the image of the young man who had helped her returned more clearly until it filled her daily thoughts. Why should she forget him? She had nothing to blame him for; in fact, she felt indebted to him. The thought of seeing him again, initially brushed aside, gradually turned into a consuming desire. Every evening, the urge to go and see him became stronger in the solitude of her room. She felt a strange irritation, a vague longing she couldn’t define, and only calmed a bit by convincing herself it was a desire to show her gratitude. She was completely alone, feeling stifled in that sleepy place, the energy of youth bubbling within her, her heart desperately longing for companionship!
‘So I took advantage of my first day out,’ she continued. ‘And besides, the weather was so nice this morning after all the dull rain.’
‘So I made the most of my first day out,’ she continued. ‘And anyway, the weather was so nice this morning after all the boring rain.’
Claude, feeling very happy and standing before her, also confessed himself, but he had nothing to hide.
Claude, feeling really happy and standing in front of her, also admitted his feelings, but he had nothing to hide.
‘For my part,’ said he, ‘I dared not think of you any more. You are like one of the fairies of the story-books, who spring from the floor and disappear into the walls at the very moment one least expects it; aren’t you now? I said to myself, “It’s all over: it was perhaps only in my fancy that I saw her come to this studio.” Yet here you are. Well, I am pleased at it, very pleased indeed.’
‘For my part,’ he said, ‘I couldn’t dare to think of you anymore. You’re like one of those fairies from storybooks that appear out of nowhere and vanish into the walls when you least expect it; right? I told myself, “It’s all over: maybe I just imagined her coming into this studio.” Yet here you are. Well, I’m glad you’re here, very glad indeed.’
Smiling, but embarrassed, Christine averted her head, pretending to look around her. But her smile soon died away. The ferocious-looking paintings which she again beheld, the glaring sketches of the South, the terrible anatomical accuracy of the studies from the nude, all chilled her as on the first occasion. She became really afraid again, and she said gravely, in an altered voice:
Smiling but feeling embarrassed, Christine turned her head, pretending to look around. But her smile quickly faded. The fierce-looking paintings she saw again, the harsh sketches of the South, the shocking anatomical detail of the nude studies, all made her feel as cold as they had the first time. She genuinely felt scared again, and she said seriously, in a different tone:
‘I am disturbing you; I am going.’
"I'm annoying you; I'm out."
‘Oh! not at all, not at all,’ exclaimed Claude, preventing her from rising. ‘It does me good to have a talk with you, for I was working myself to death. Oh! that confounded picture; it’s killing me as it is.’
‘Oh! not at all, not at all,’ Claude exclaimed, stopping her from getting up. ‘It really helps me to chat with you, because I’ve been working myself to death. Oh! that frustrating painting; it's driving me crazy as it is.’
Thereupon Christine, lifting her eyes, looked at the large picture, the canvas that had been turned to the wall on the previous occasion, and which she had vainly wished to see.
Thereupon, Christine lifted her eyes and looked at the large picture, the canvas that had been turned to the wall last time, and which she had wanted to see in vain.
The background—the dark glade pierced by a flood of sunlight—was still only broadly brushed in. But the two little wrestlers—the fair one and the dark—almost finished by now, showed clearly in the light. In the foreground, the gentleman in the velveteen jacket, three times begun afresh, had now been left in distress. The painter was more particularly working at the principal figure, the woman lying on the grass. He had not touched the head again. He was battling with the body, changing his model every week, so despondent at being unable to satisfy himself that for a couple of days he had been trying to improve the figure from imagination, without recourse to nature, although he boasted that he never invented.
The background—the dark clearing lit up by a burst of sunlight—was still just loosely painted. But the two little wrestlers—the blond one and the dark-haired one—were almost done now and stood out clearly in the light. In the foreground, the man in the velveteen jacket, who had started over three times, was left in a state of distress. The painter was mainly focused on the main figure, the woman lying on the grass. He hadn’t made any changes to her head again. He was struggling with the body, switching his model every week, so frustrated with not being able to meet his own standards that for a couple of days he tried to improve the figure from his imagination, without looking to nature, even though he claimed he never made things up.
Christine at once recognised herself. Yes, that nude girl sprawling on the grass, one arm behind her head, smiling with lowered eyelids, was herself, for she had her features. The idea absolutely revolted her, and she was wounded too by the wildness of the painting, so brutal indeed that she considered herself abominably insulted. She did not understand that kind of art; she thought it execrable, and felt a hatred against it, the instinctive hatred of an enemy. She rose at last, and curtly repeated, ‘I must be going.’
Christine immediately recognized herself. Yes, that naked girl lying on the grass, one arm behind her head, smiling with her eyes half-closed, was her, because she had her features. The thought completely disgusted her, and she felt hurt by the rawness of the painting, so harsh that she felt it was a terrible insult. She didn’t understand that kind of art; she thought it was awful and felt a visceral hatred toward it, the instinctive animosity of an enemy. Finally, she stood up and said curtly, "I have to go."
Claude watched her attentively, both grieved and surprised by her sudden change of manner.
Claude watched her closely, feeling both sad and shocked by her sudden shift in behavior.
‘Going already?’
'Leaving already?'
‘Yes, they are waiting for me. Good-bye.’
‘Yeah, they’re waiting for me. Bye.’
And she had already reached the door before he could take her hand, and venture to ask her:
And she had already reached the door before he could take her hand and dare to ask her:
‘When shall I see you again?’
‘When will I see you again?’
She allowed her hand to remain in his. For a moment she seemed to hesitate.
She let her hand stay in his. For a moment, she appeared to hesitate.
‘I don’t know. I am so busy.’
‘I don’t know. I’m really busy.’
Then she withdrew her hand and went off, hastily, saying: ‘One of these days, when I can. Good-bye.’
Then she pulled her hand away and left quickly, saying, ‘One of these days, when I can. Bye.’
Claude remained stock-still on the threshold. He wondered what had come over her again to cause her sudden coolness, her covert irritation. He closed the door, and walked about, with dangling arms, and without understanding, seeking vainly for the phrase, the gesture that could have offended her. And he in his turn became angry, and launched an oath into space, with a terrific shrug of the shoulders, as if to rid himself of this silly worry. Did a man ever understand women? However, the sight of the roses, overlapping the water-jug, pacified him; they smelt so sweet. Their scent pervaded the whole studio, and silently he resumed his work amidst the perfume.
Claude stood frozen at the doorway. He wondered what had caused her sudden coldness and hidden irritation again. He closed the door and walked around with his arms hanging limply, confused, searching in vain for the words or gesture that might have upset her. Frustrated, he became angry and muttered an oath into the air, shrugging his shoulders as if to shake off this pointless concern. Did a man ever really understand women? However, the sight of the roses spilling over the water jug calmed him; they smelled so sweet. Their fragrance filled the whole studio, and silently he went back to his work, surrounded by the lovely scent.
Two more months passed by. During the earlier days Claude, at the slightest stir of a morning, when Madame Joseph brought him up his breakfast or his letters, quickly turned his head, and could not control a gesture of disappointment. He no longer went out until after four, and the doorkeeper having told him one evening, on his return home, that a young person had called to see him at about five, he had only grown calm on ascertaining that the visitor was merely a model, Zoé Piedefer. Then, as the days went by, he was seized with a furious fit of work, becoming unapproachable to every one, indulging in such violent theories that even his friends did not venture to contradict him. He swept the world from his path with one gesture; there was no longer to be anything but painting left. One might murder one’s parents, comrades, and women especially, and it would all be a good riddance. After this terrible fever he fell into abominable despondency, spending a week of impotence and doubt, a whole week of torture, during which he fancied himself struck silly. But he was getting over it, he had resumed his usual life, his resigned solitary struggle with his great picture, when one foggy morning, towards the end of October, he started and hastily set his palette aside. There had been no knock, but he had just recognised the footfall coming up the stairs. He opened the door and she walked in. She had come at last.
Two more months went by. In the early days, Claude would turn his head quickly and show his disappointment at the smallest sound in the morning, whether it was Madame Joseph bringing him his breakfast or his letters. He stopped going out until after four, and one evening when he returned home, the doorkeeper told him that a young woman had come to see him around five. He only relaxed when he found out that the visitor was just a model, Zoé Piedefer. Then, as time passed, he became consumed with a furious work ethic, shutting himself off from everyone and embracing such extreme ideas that even his friends didn't dare to challenge him. He cleared everything from his life with a single motion; painting was all that mattered now. One could even do away with parents, friends, and especially women, and it would be a relief. After this intense period, he fell into a dreadful depression, spending a week in a state of helplessness and doubt, a whole week of torment during which he felt like he was going crazy. But he was starting to recover; he returned to his usual routine, resigning himself to his solitary battle with his big painting. Then one foggy morning, towards the end of October, he suddenly paused and quickly set his palette aside. There was no knock, but he recognized the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs. He opened the door, and she walked in. She had finally come.
Christine that day wore a large cloak of grey material which enveloped her from head to foot. Her little velvet hat was dark, and the fog outside had pearled her black lace veil. But he thought her looking very cheerful, with the first slight shiver of winter upon her. She at once began to make excuses for having so long delayed her return. She smiled at him in her pretty candid manner, confessed that she had hesitated, and that she had almost made up her mind to come no more. Yes, she had her own opinions about things, which she felt sure he understood. As it happened, he did not understand at all—he had no wish to understand, seeing that she was there. It was quite sufficient that she was not vexed with him, that she would consent to look in now and then like a chum. There were no explanations; they kept their respective torments and the struggles of recent times to themselves. For nearly an hour they chatted together right pleasantly, with nothing hidden nor antagonistic remaining between them; it was as if an understanding had been arrived at, unknown to themselves, and while they were far apart. She did not even appear to notice the sketches and studies on the walls. For a moment she looked fixedly at the large picture, at the figure of the woman lying on the grass under the blazing golden sun. No, it was not like herself, that girl had neither her face nor her body. How silly to have fancied that such a horrid mess of colour was herself! And her friendship for the young fellow was heightened by a touch of pity; he could not even convey a likeness. When she went off, it was she who on the threshold cordially held out her hand.
Christine that day wore a large grey cloak that wrapped around her from head to toe. Her small dark velvet hat sat on her head, and the fog outside had dotted her black lace veil with beads. But he thought she looked very cheerful, feeling the first slight chill of winter. She immediately started making excuses for taking so long to return. She smiled at him with her pretty, honest demeanor, admitted that she had hesitated, and that she had almost decided not to come back. Yes, she had her own opinions about things, which she was sure he understood. As it turned out, he didn’t understand at all—he had no desire to understand, especially since she was right there. It was enough for him that she wasn’t upset with him, that she was willing to drop by now and then like a friend. There were no explanations; they kept their respective struggles and recent troubles to themselves. For almost an hour, they chatted pleasantly, with nothing hidden or confrontational between them; it felt as if an understanding had been reached without them even realizing it, despite their distance. She didn't even seem to notice the sketches and studies on the walls. For a moment, she stared at the large painting, at the figure of the woman lying on the grass under the blazing golden sun. No, it didn’t look like her at all; that girl had neither her face nor her body. How ridiculous to think that such a messy splash of color could represent her! And her friendship with the young man was tinged with a bit of pity; he couldn’t even capture a likeness. When she left, it was she who warmly extended her hand at the threshold.
‘You know, I shall come back again—’
‘You know, I’ll come back again—’
‘Yes, in two months’ time.’
"Yes, in two months."
‘No, next week. You’ll see, next Thursday.’
‘No, next week. You'll see, next Thursday.’
On the Thursday she punctually returned, and after that she did not miss a week. At first she had no particular day for calling, simply taking advantage of her opportunities; but subsequently she selected Monday, the day allowed her by Madame Vanzade in order that she might have a walk in the fresh, open air of the Bois de Boulogne. She had to be back home by eleven, and she walked the whole way very quickly, coming in all aglow from the run, for it was a long stretch from Passy to the Quai de Bourbon. During four winter months, from October to February, she came in this fashion, now in drenching rain, now among the mists from the Seine, now in the pale sunlight that threw a little warmth over the quays. Indeed, after the first month, she at times arrived unexpectedly, taking advantage of some errand in town to look in, and then she could only stay for a couple of minutes; they had barely had time enough to say ‘How do you do?’ when she was already scampering down the stairs again, exclaiming ‘Good-bye.’
On the Thursday she showed up right on time, and from then on, she never missed a week. At first, she didn't have a specific day for her visits; she just went when she could. But later, she chose Monday as her day, which Madame Vanzade allowed so she could enjoy a walk in the fresh air of the Bois de Boulogne. She had to be back home by eleven, so she hurried the whole way, arriving all flushed from the run, since it was quite a trek from Passy to the Quai de Bourbon. For four winter months, from October to February, she came like this, sometimes in pouring rain, sometimes amidst the mists from the Seine, and sometimes in the soft sunlight that gave a bit of warmth over the quays. In fact, after the first month, she sometimes came by unexpectedly, seizing an errand in town as an excuse to drop by, and then she could only stay for a couple of minutes; they barely had enough time to say ‘How do you do?’ before she was already rushing down the stairs again, shouting ‘Good-bye.’
And now Claude learned to know Christine. With his everlasting mistrust of woman a suspicion had remained to him, the suspicion of some love adventure in the provinces; but the girl’s soft eyes and bright laughter had carried all before them; he felt that she was as innocent as a big child. As soon as she arrived, quite unembarrassed, feeling fully at her ease, as with a friend, she began to indulge in a ceaseless flow of chatter. She had told him a score of times about her childhood at Clermont, and she constantly reverted to it. On the evening that her father, Captain Hallegrain, had suddenly died, she and her mother had been to church. She perfectly remembered their return home and the horrible night that had followed; the captain, very stout and muscular, lying stretched on a mattress, with his lower jaw protruding to such a degree that in her girlish memory she could not picture him otherwise. She also had that same jaw, and when her mother had not known how to master her, she had often cried: ‘Ah, my girl, you’ll eat your heart’s blood out like your father.’ Poor mother! how she, Christine, had worried her with her love of horseplay, with her mad turbulent fits. As far back as she could remember, she pictured her mother ever seated at the same window, quietly painting fans, a slim little woman with very soft eyes, the only thing she had inherited of her. When people wanted to please her mother they told her, ‘she has got your eyes.’ And then she smiled, happy in the thought of having contributed at least that touch of sweetness to her daughter’s features. After the death of her husband, she had worked so late as to endanger her eyesight. But how else could she have lived? Her widow’s pension—five hundred francs per annum—barely sufficed for the needs of her child. For five years Christine had seen her mother grow thinner and paler, wasting away a little bit each day until she became a mere shadow. And now she felt remorseful at not having been more obedient, at having driven her mother to despair by lack of application. She had begun each week with magnificent intentions, promising that she would soon help her to earn money; but her arms and legs got the fidgets, in spite of her efforts; the moment she became quiet she fell ill. Then one morning her mother had been unable to get up, and had died; her voice too weak to make itself heard, her eyes full of big tears. Ever did Christine behold her thus dead, with her weeping eyes wide open and fixed on her.
And now Claude got to know Christine. With his ongoing distrust of women, he had a nagging suspicion of some romantic escapade in the countryside; but the girl's gentle eyes and bright laughter won him over completely; he felt she was as innocent as a big child. As soon as she arrived, completely at ease, like with a friend, she started talking nonstop. She had told him countless stories about her childhood in Clermont and kept bringing it up. On the evening her father, Captain Hallegrain, passed away unexpectedly, she and her mother had gone to church. She vividly remembered their return home and the terrible night that followed; the captain, very stout and muscular, lying on a mattress, his lower jaw sticking out to such an extent that in her childhood memories, she couldn’t picture him any other way. She also had that same jaw, and when her mother struggled to manage her, she would often cry, ‘Ah, my girl, you’ll wear yourself out like your father.’ Poor mother! How Christine had worried her with her love of playful antics and her wild, turbulent moods. As far back as she could remember, she pictured her mother always sitting at the same window, quietly painting fans, a petite woman with very soft eyes, the only trait Christine inherited from her. When people wanted to compliment her mother, they would say, ‘She has your eyes.’ And then her mother would smile, happy to think she had given at least that touch of sweetness to her daughter’s features. After her husband’s death, she worked so late that it jeopardized her eyesight. But how else could she have survived? Her widow's pension—five hundred francs a year—barely covered her child's needs. For five years, Christine watched her mother grow thinner and paler, gradually fading away until she became a mere shadow. Now she felt guilty for not being more obedient, for having driven her mother to despair with her lack of effort. Each week, she started with great intentions, promising she would soon help her earn money; but her arms and legs would get restless, and despite her attempts, the moment she tried to settle down, she fell ill. Then one morning, her mother couldn't get up and had passed away; her voice too weak to be heard, her eyes filled with tears. Christine always remembered her like that, dead, with her tear-filled eyes wide open and fixed on her.
At other times, Christine, when questioned by Claude about Clermont, forgot those sorrows to recall more cheerful memories. She laughed gaily at the idea of their encampment, as she called it, in the Rue de l’Éclache; she born in Strasburg, her father a Gascon, her mother a Parisian, and all three thrown into that nook of Auvergne, which they detested. The Rue de l’Éclache, sloping down to the Botanical Gardens, was narrow and dank, gloomy, like a vault. Not a shop, never a passer-by—nothing but melancholy frontages, with shutters always closed. At the back, however, their windows, overlooking some courtyards, were turned to the full sunlight. The dining-room opened even on to a spacious balcony, a kind of wooden gallery, whose arcades were hung with a giant wistaria which almost smothered them with foliage. And the girl had grown up there, at first near her invalid father, then cloistered, as it were, with her mother, whom the least exertion exhausted. She had remained so complete a stranger to the town and its neighbourhood, that Claude and herself burst into laughter when she met his inquiries with the constant answer, ‘I don’t know.’ The mountains? Yes, there were mountains on one side, they could be seen at the end of the streets; while on the other side of the town, after passing along other streets, there were flat fields stretching far away; but she never went there, the distance was too great. The only height she remembered was the Puy de Dôme, rounded off at the summit like a hump. In the town itself she could have found her way to the cathedral blindfold; one had to turn round by the Place de Jaude and take the Rue des Gras; but more than that she could not tell him; the rest of the town was an entanglement, a maze of sloping lanes and boulevards; a town of black lava ever dipping downward, where the rain of the thunderstorms swept by torrentially amidst formidable flashes of lightning. Oh! those storms; she still shuddered to think of them. Just opposite her room, above the roofs, the lightning conductor of the museum was always on fire. In the sitting-room she had her own window—a deep recess as big as a room itself—where her work-table and personal nick-nacks stood. It was there that her mother had taught her to read; it was there that, later on, she had fallen asleep while listening to her masters, so greatly did the fatigue of learning daze her. And now she made fun of her own ignorance; she was a well-educated young lady, and no mistake, unable even to repeat the names of the Kings of France, with the dates of their accessions; a famous musician too, who had never got further than that elementary pianoforte exercise, ‘The little boats’; a prodigy in water-colour painting, who scamped her trees because foliage was too difficult to imitate. Then she skipped, without any transition, to the fifteen months she had spent at the Convent of the Visitation after her mother’s death—a large convent, outside the town, with magnificent gardens. There was no end to her stories about the good sisters, their jealousies, their foolish doings, their simplicity, that made one start. She was to have taken the veil, but she felt stifled the moment she entered a church. It had seemed to be all over with her, when the Superior, by whom she was treated with great affection, diverted her from the cloister by procuring her that situation at Madame Vanzade’s. She had not yet got over the surprise. How had Mother des Saints Anges been able to read her mind so clearly? For, in fact, since she had been living in Paris she had dropped into complete indifference about religion.
At times, Christine, when Claude asked her about Clermont, pushed aside those sorrows to remember happier times. She laughed joyfully at the idea of their stay, as she called it, in the Rue de l’Éclache; she was born in Strasbourg, with her father being Gascon, her mother Parisian, and all three stuck in that part of Auvergne, which they despised. The Rue de l’Éclache, sloping down to the Botanical Gardens, was narrow and damp, dark like a vault. There were no shops, hardly any pedestrians—only gloomy facades, with shutters always closed. However, at the back, their windows opened onto courtyards that faced the full sun. The dining room even led to a spacious balcony, a sort of wooden gallery, draped with a giant wisteria that almost smothered them with its leaves. And the girl had grown up there, first near her sick father, then somewhat isolated with her mother, who got tired from even the slightest effort. She had become such a stranger to the town and its surroundings that Claude and she burst into laughter when she replied to his questions with the constant answer, “I don’t know.” The mountains? Sure, you could see mountains at the end of the streets; on the other side of town, after walking through other streets, there were flat fields stretching far away; but she never went there because it was too far. The only height she remembered was the Puy de Dôme, rounded at the top like a hump. In town, she could find her way to the cathedral blindfolded; you just had to turn by the Place de Jaude and take the Rue des Gras; but beyond that, she couldn’t tell him more; the rest of the town was a tangle, a maze of sloping streets and boulevards; a town of black lava always sloping downwards, where rain from thunderstorms poured down heavily amid intense flashes of lightning. Oh! those storms; she still shuddered to think about them. Just opposite her room, above the rooftops, the lightning rod of the museum was always sparking. In the sitting room, she had her own window—a deep recess as big as a room—where her worktable and personal belongings were. It was there that her mother had taught her to read; it was where she later dozed off while listening to her teachers, so overwhelming was the fatigue of learning. And now she laughed at her own ignorance; she was a well-educated young lady, no doubt about it, who couldn’t even list the names of the Kings of France along with their accession dates; a famous musician too, who had never progressed beyond that basic piano exercise, “The Little Boats”; a water-color painting prodigy, who rushed through her trees because the leaves were too hard to replicate. Then, without any transition, she jumped to the fifteen months she spent at the Convent of the Visitation after her mother’s death—a large convent outside of town, with beautiful gardens. She had endless stories about the good sisters, their jealousies, their silly antics, their simplicity, which were quite surprising. She was supposed to take the veil, but she felt suffocated the moment she stepped into a church. It seemed like it was over for her until the Superior, who treated her with great affection, pulled her away from the convent by getting her that job with Madame Vanzade. She still hadn’t gotten over the shock. How had Mother des Saints Anges been able to understand her so clearly? Because, in reality, since moving to Paris, she had developed a complete indifference to religion.
When all the reminiscences of Clermont were exhausted, Claude wanted to hear about her life at Madame Vanzade’s, and each week she gave him fresh particulars. The life led in the little house at Passy, silent and shut off from the outer world, was a very regular one, with no more noise about it than the faint tic-tac of an old-fashioned timepiece. Two antiquated domestics, a cook and a manservant, who had been with the family for forty years, alone glided in their slippers about the deserted rooms, like a couple of ghosts. Now and then, at very long intervals, there came a visitor: some octogenarian general, so desiccated, so slight of build that he scarcely pressed on the carpet. The house was also the home of shadows; the sun filtered with the mere gleam of a night light through the Venetian blinds. Since madame had become paralysed in the knees and stone blind, so that she no longer left her room, she had had no other recreation than that of listening to the reading of religious books. Ah! those endless readings, how they weighed upon the girl at times! If she had only known a trade, how gladly she would have cut out dresses, concocted bonnets, or goffered the petals of artificial flowers. And to think that she was capable of nothing, when she had been taught everything, and that there was only enough stuff in her to make a salaried drudge, a semi-domestic! She suffered horribly, too, in that stiff, lonely dwelling which smelt of the tomb. She was seized once more with the vertigo of her childhood, as when she had striven to compel herself to work, in order to please her mother; her blood rebelled; she would have liked to shout and jump about, in her desire for life. But madame treated her so gently, sending her away from her room, and ordering her to take long walks, that she felt full of remorse when, on her return to the Quai de Bourbon, she was obliged to tell a falsehood; to talk of the Bois de Boulogne or invent some ceremony at church where she now never set foot. Madame seemed to take to her more and more every day; there were constant presents, now a silk dress, now a tiny gold watch, even some underlinen. She herself was very fond of Madame Vanzade; she had wept one day when the latter had called her daughter; she had sworn never to leave her, such was her heart-felt pity at seeing her so old and helpless.
When all the memories of Clermont were used up, Claude wanted to hear about her life at Madame Vanzade’s, and every week she shared new details. The life in the small house in Passy, quiet and isolated from the outside world, was very routine, with no more noise than the soft ticking of an old clock. Two elderly staff members, a cook and a manservant, who had been with the family for forty years, silently moved around the empty rooms in their slippers, like a couple of ghosts. Occasionally, a visitor would drop by: some elderly general, so frail and slight that he barely made an impression on the carpet. The house was filled with shadows; the sunlight barely filtered through the Venetian blinds, resembling the glow of a nightlight. Since Madame had become paralyzed in her legs and completely blind, no longer leaving her room, her only entertainment had been listening to religious books being read aloud. Ah, those endless readings, how heavy they felt at times! If only she had learned a trade, how happily she would have tailored dresses, designed bonnets, or shaped the petals of fake flowers. And to think that she was good for nothing, despite having been taught everything, and that there was only enough in her to be a paid drudge, a sort of half-servant! She suffered immensely, too, in that stiff, lonely house that smelled like a tomb. She was once again overwhelmed by the dizziness of her childhood, just as she had pushed herself to work to make her mother happy; her blood boiled; she wanted to scream and run around, longing for life. But Madame treated her so kindly, encouraging her to leave her room and go on long walks, that she felt guilty when, upon returning to the Quai de Bourbon, she had to lie; to talk about the Bois de Boulogne or make up some church ceremony that she no longer attended. Madame seemed to grow fonder of her every day; there were constant gifts, a silk dress one day, a little gold watch the next, even some underwear. She was very fond of Madame Vanzade too; she had cried one day when Madame called her daughter; she had vowed never to leave her, feeling such deep pity for her old and helpless state.
‘Well,’ said Claude one morning, ‘you’ll be rewarded; she’ll leave you her money.’
‘Well,’ Claude said one morning, ‘you’ll be rewarded; she’ll leave you her money.’
Christine looked astonished. ‘Do you think so? It is said that she is worth three millions of francs. No, no, I have never dreamt of such a thing, and I won’t. What would become of me?’
Christine looked amazed. ‘Do you really think so? They say she's worth three million francs. No, no, I’ve never even considered that, and I won’t. What would happen to me?’
Claude had averted his head, and hastily replied, ‘Well, you’d become rich, that’s all. But no doubt she’ll first of all marry you off—’
Claude turned his head away and quickly responded, “Well, you'd get rich, that's all. But I'm sure she'll want to marry you off first—”
On hearing this, Christine could hold out no longer, but burst into laughter. ‘To one of her old friends, eh? perhaps the general who has a silver chin. What a good joke!’
On hearing this, Christine couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing. ‘To one of her old friends, huh? Maybe the general with the silver chin. What a great joke!’
So far they had gone no further than chumming like old friends. He was almost as new to life as she, having had nothing but chance adventures, and living in an ideal world of his own, fanciful amid romantic amours. To see each other in secret like this, from pure friendship, without anything more tender passing between them than a cordial shake of the hand at her arrival, and another one when she left, seemed to them quite natural. Still for her part she scented that he was shy, and at times she looked at him fixedly, with the wondering perturbation of unconscious passion. But as yet nothing ardent or agitating spoilt the pleasure they felt in being together. Their hands remained cool; they spoke cheerfully on all subjects; they sometimes argued like friends, who feel sure they will not fall out. Only, this friendship grew so keen that they could no longer live without seeing one another.
So far, they had only become like old friends. He was almost as new to life as she was, having experienced nothing but random adventures and living in his own ideal world filled with fantasies and romantic encounters. Meeting in secret like this, purely out of friendship, without anything more intimate than a friendly handshake when she arrived and another when she left, felt completely natural to them. Still, she could sense that he was shy, and sometimes she would look at him intently, with a mix of wonder and unconscious attraction. But for now, nothing passionate or intense disrupted the joy they found in each other’s company. Their hands stayed cool; they chatted happily about everything; and they sometimes argued like friends who were confident they wouldn’t fall out. However, this friendship became so intense that they couldn’t imagine being apart any longer.
The moment Christine came, Claude took the key from outside the door. She herself insisted upon this, lest somebody might disturb them. After a few visits she had taken absolute possession of the studio. She seemed to be at home there. She was tormented by a desire to make the place a little more tidy, for such disorder worried her and made her uncomfortable. But it was not an easy matter. The painter had strictly forbidden Madame Joseph to sweep up things, lest the dust should get on the fresh paint. So, on the first occasions when his companion attempted to clean up a bit, he watched her with anxious entreating eyes. What was the good of changing the place of things? Didn’t it suffice to have them at hand? However, she exhibited such gay determination, she seemed so happy at playing the housewife, that he let her have her own way at last. And now, the moment she had arrived and taken off her gloves, she pinned up her dress to avoid soiling it, and set the big studio in order in the twinkling of an eye. There was no longer a pile of cinders before the stove; the screen hid the bedstead and the washstand; the couch was brushed, the wardrobe polished; the deal table was cleared of the crockery, and had not a stain of paint; and above the chairs, which were symmetrically arranged, and the spanned easels propped against the walls, the big cuckoo clock, with full-blown pink flowers on its dial, seemed to tick more sonorously. Altogether it was magnificent; one would not have recognised the place. He, stupefied, watched her trotting to and fro, twisting about and singing as she went. Was this then the lazybones who had such dreadful headaches at the least bit of work? But she laughed; at headwork, yes; but exertion with her hands and feet did her good, seemed to straighten her like a young sapling. She confessed, even as she would have confessed some depraved taste, her liking for lowly household cares; a liking which had greatly worried her mother, whose educational ideal consisted of accomplishments, and who would have made her a governess with soft hands, touching nothing vulgar. How Christine had been chided indeed whenever she was caught, as a little girl, sweeping, dusting, and playing delightedly at being cook! Even nowadays, if she had been able to indulge in a bout with the dust at Madame Vanzade’s, she would have felt less bored. But what would they have said to that? She would no longer have been considered a lady. And so she came to satisfy her longings at the Quai de Bourbon, panting with the exercise, all aglow, her eyes glistening with a woman’s delight at biting into forbidden fruit.
The moment Christine arrived, Claude took the key from outside the door. She insisted on this so that no one would interrupt them. After a few visits, she completely took over the studio. She seemed to feel at home there. She was driven by a need to tidy things up a bit because the mess made her anxious and uncomfortable. But it wasn't easy. The painter had explicitly told Madame Joseph not to clean, so as not to get dust on the fresh paint. The first few times she tried to clean, he watched her with worried eyes. What was the point of moving things around? Wasn't it enough just to have them within reach? Still, she was so cheerful and determined, and seemed so happy playing the housewife, that he eventually let her have her way. Now, the moment she arrived and took off her gloves, she hiked up her dress to avoid getting it dirty and quickly organized the big studio. There were no longer cinders piled up in front of the stove; the screen hid the bed and the washstand; the couch was brushed, the wardrobe polished; the table was cleared of dishes and had no paint stains; and above the symmetrically arranged chairs and easels propped against the walls, the big cuckoo clock with vibrant pink flowers on its face seemed to tick more loudly. Overall, it looked amazing; one wouldn’t even recognize the place. He, astonished, watched her move back and forth, twisting around and singing as she worked. Was this really the slacker who got terrible headaches at the slightest bit of work? But she laughed; it was hard work that gave her headaches, while using her hands and feet was good for her, almost like it straightened her out like a young tree. She admitted, almost like confessing a guilty pleasure, that she enjoyed simple household tasks; this preference had worried her mother, whose educational dream was for her to have accomplishments and become a governess with delicate hands, avoiding anything considered common. Christine had been scolded many times as a little girl for sweeping, dusting, and joyfully pretending to be a cook! Even now, if she could have indulged in some dusting at Madame Vanzade’s, she would have felt less bored. But what would people say? She wouldn’t be seen as a lady anymore. So, she sought to fulfill her desires at Quai de Bourbon, out of breath from her efforts, glowing, her eyes sparkling with a woman’s joy at enjoying something forbidden.
Claude by this time grew conscious of having a woman’s care around him. In order to make her sit down and chat quietly, he would ask her now and then to sew a torn cuff or coat-tail. She herself had offered to look over his linen; but it was no longer with the ardour of a housewife, eager to be up and doing. First of all, she hardly knew how to work; she held her needle like a girl brought up in contempt of sewing. Besides, the enforced quiescence and the attention that had to be given to such work, the small stitches which had to be looked to one by one, exasperated her. Thus the studio was bright with cleanliness like a drawing-room, but Claude himself remained in rags, and they both joked about it, thinking it great fun.
Claude was now aware of having a woman's care around him. To encourage her to sit down and chat quietly, he would occasionally ask her to mend a torn cuff or coat-tail. She had offered to help with his laundry, but it was no longer with the enthusiasm of a housewife eager to be productive. For one thing, she hardly knew how to sew; she held her needle like a girl who had been taught to look down on sewing. Besides, the enforced stillness and the focus required for such work, having to pay attention to every small stitch, frustrated her. As a result, the studio was spotless and tidy like a drawing room, but Claude himself remained in tattered clothes, and they both laughed about it, finding it amusing.
How happy were those months that they spent together, those four months of frost and rain whiled away in the studio, where the red-hot stove roared like an organ-pipe! The winter seemed to isolate them from the world still more. When the snow covered the adjacent roofs, when the sparrows fluttered against the window, they smiled at feeling warm and cosy, at being lost, as it were, amidst the great silent city. But they did not always confine themselves to that one little nook, for she allowed him at last to see her home. For a long while she had insisted upon going away by herself, feeling ashamed of being seen in the streets on a man’s arm. Then, one day when the rain fell all of a sudden, she was obliged to let him come downstairs with an umbrella. The rain having ceased almost immediately, she sent him back when they reached the other side of the Pont Louis-Philippe. They only remained a few moments beside the parapet, looking at the Mail, and happy at being together in the open air. Down below, large barges, moored against the quay, and full of apples, were ranged four rows deep, so close together that the planks thrown across them made a continuous path for the women and children running to and fro. They were amused by the sight of all that fruit, those enormous piles littering the banks, the round baskets which were carried hither and thither, while a strong odour, suggestive of cider in fermentation, mingled with the moist gusts from the river.
How happy were those months they spent together, those four months of frost and rain spent in the studio, where the red-hot stove roared like an organ pipe! The winter seemed to cut them off from the world even more. When the snow covered the roofs nearby, and the sparrows flitted against the window, they smiled at feeling warm and cozy, at being, in a way, lost amidst the great silent city. But they didn't always stick to that one little corner, as she eventually allowed him to see her home. For a long time, she had insisted on going out alone, feeling embarrassed to be seen on a man’s arm. Then, one day when it suddenly started raining, she had to let him walk downstairs with an umbrella. The rain stopped almost right away, and she sent him back when they reached the other side of the Pont Louis-Philippe. They only stayed a few moments by the parapet, looking at the Mail, and happy to be together in the open air. Down below, large barges, moored against the quay and full of apples, were lined up four rows deep, so close that the planks thrown across them created a continuous path for the women and children running back and forth. They were entertained by the sight of all that fruit, those massive piles cluttering the banks, and the round baskets being moved around while a strong smell, reminiscent of fermenting cider, mixed with the damp breezes from the river.
A week later, when the sun again showed itself, and Claude extolled the solitude of the quays round the Isle Saint Louis, Christine consented to take a walk. They strolled up the Quai de Bourbon and the Quai d’Anjou, pausing at every few steps and growing interested in the various scenes of river life; the dredger whose buckets grated against their chains, the floating wash-house, which resounded with the hubbub of a quarrel, and the steam cranes busy unloading the lighters. She did not cease to wonder at one thought which came to her. Was it possible that yonder Quai des Ormes, so full of life across the stream, that this Quai Henri IV., with its broad embankment and lower shore, where bands of children and dogs rolled over in the sand, that this panorama of an active, densely-populated capital was the same accursed scene that had appeared to her for a moment in a gory flash on the night of her arrival? They went round the point of the island, strolling more leisurely still to enjoy the solitude and tranquillity which the old historic mansions seem to have implanted there. They watched the water seething between the wooden piles of the Estacade, and returned by way of the Quai de Béthune and the Quai d’Orléans, instinctively drawn closer to each other by the widening of the stream, keeping elbow to elbow at sight of the vast flow, with their eyes fixed on the distant Halle aux Vins and the Jardin des Plantes. In the pale sky, the cupolas of the public buildings assumed a bluish hue. When they reached the Pont St. Louis, Claude had to point out Notre-Dame by name, for Christine did not recognise the edifice from the rear, where it looked like a colossal creature crouching down between its flying buttresses, which suggested sprawling paws, while above its long leviathan spine its towers rose like a double head. Their real find that day, however, was at the western point of the island, that point like the prow of a ship always riding at anchor, afloat between two swift currents, in sight of Paris, but ever unable to get into port. They went down some very steep steps there, and discovered a solitary bank planted with lofty trees. It was a charming refuge—a hermitage in the midst of a crowd. Paris was rumbling around them, on the quays, on the bridges, while they at the water’s edge tasted the delight of being alone, ignored by the whole world. From that day forth that bank became a little rustic coign of theirs, a favourite open-air resort, where they took advantage of the sunny hours, when the great heat of the studio, where the red-hot stove kept roaring, oppressed them too much, filling their hands with a fever of which they were afraid.
A week later, when the sun shined again, and Claude praised the quiet of the quays around the Isle Saint Louis, Christine agreed to go for a walk. They strolled up the Quai de Bourbon and the Quai d’Anjou, pausing every few steps as they became intrigued by the various scenes of river life: the dredger whose buckets clanked against their chains, the floating laundromat echoing with the sound of an argument, and the steam cranes working hard to unload the barges. She couldn’t stop thinking about one question that kept coming to her mind. Was it possible that the lively Quai des Ormes across the stream, with its vibrant activity, and this Quai Henri IV., with its wide embankment and sandy shore where kids and dogs rolled around, that this bustling scene of a crowded city was the same horrible image that had flashed before her eyes on the night she arrived? They rounded the point of the island, walking even more slowly to enjoy the peace and calm that the old historic buildings seemed to bring. They watched the water churning between the wooden beams of the Estacade and returned along the Quai de Béthune and the Quai d’Orléans, feeling instinctively drawn closer to each other as the river widened, staying shoulder to shoulder as they gazed at the vast flow, their eyes fixed on the distant Halle aux Vins and the Jardin des Plantes. In the pale sky, the cupolas of the public buildings took on a bluish tint. When they reached the Pont St. Louis, Claude had to name Notre-Dame for Christine since she didn’t recognize the building from the back, where it looked like a gigantic creature crouched between its flying buttresses, resembling sprawling paws, while its towers rose above its long body like a double head. Their real discovery that day, however, was at the western point of the island, which jutted out like the bow of a ship always anchored, afloat between two swift currents, visible to Paris but never able to dock. They went down some very steep steps and found a secluded bank lined with tall trees. It was a lovely refuge—a retreat in the middle of a crowd. Paris buzzed around them on the quays and bridges, while they, by the water’s edge, enjoyed the pleasure of being alone, unnoticed by the whole world. From that day on, that bank became their little rustic hideaway, a favorite outdoor spot where they took advantage of the sunny hours, escaping the intense heat of the studio, where the hot stove blazed, overwhelming them with a fever they feared.
Nevertheless, Christine had so far objected to be accompanied farther than the Mail. At the Quai des Ormes she always bade Claude go back, as if Paris, with her crowds and possible encounters, began at the long stretch of quays which she had to traverse on her way home. But Passy was so far off, and she felt so dull at having to go such a distance alone, that gradually she gave way. She began by allowing Claude to see her as far as the Hôtel de Ville; then as far as the Pont-Neuf; at last as far as the Tuileries. She forgot the danger; they walked arm in arm like a young married couple; and that constantly repeated promenade, that leisurely journey over the self-same ground by the river side, acquired an infinite charm, full of a happiness such as could scarcely be surpassed in after-times. They truly belonged to each other, though they had not erred. It seemed as if the very soul of the great city, rising from the river, wrapped them around with all the love that had throbbed behind the grey stone walls through the long lapse of ages.
Nevertheless, Christine had so far refused to be accompanied any farther than the Mail. At the Quai des Ormes, she always told Claude to turn back, as if Paris, with its crowds and potential encounters, started at the long stretch of quays she had to walk along on her way home. But Passy felt so far away, and she was feeling so dull about having to go that distance alone, that gradually she gave in. She started by letting Claude walk her as far as the Hôtel de Ville; then to the Pont-Neuf; finally, all the way to the Tuileries. She forgot the danger; they walked arm in arm like a young married couple; and that repeatedly taken stroll, that relaxed journey over the same stretch by the riverside, took on an infinite charm, filled with a happiness that could hardly be surpassed later on. They truly belonged to each other, even though they hadn’t crossed any lines. It felt as if the very spirit of the grand city, rising from the river, surrounded them with all the love that had pulsed behind the grey stone walls over the ages.
Since the nipping colds of December, Christine only came in the afternoon, and it was about four o’clock, when the sun was sinking, that Claude escorted her back on his arm. On days when the sky was clear, they could see the long line of quays stretching away into space directly they had crossed the Pont Louis-Philippe. From one end to the other the slanting sun powdered the houses on the right bank with golden dust, while, on the left, the islets, the buildings, stood out in a black line against the blazing glory of the sunset. Between the sombre and the brilliant margin, the spangled river sparkled, cut in twain every now and then by the long bars of its bridges; the five arches of the Pont Notre-Dame showing under the single span of the Pont d’Arcole; then the Pont-au-Change and the Pont-Neuf, beyond each of whose shadows appeared a luminous patch, a sheet of bluish satiny water, growing paler here and there with a mirror-like reflection. And while the dusky outlines on the left terminated in the silhouettes of the pointed towers of the Palais de Justice, sharply and darkly defined against the sky, a gentle curve undulated on the right, stretching away so far that the Pavillon de Flore, who stood forth like a citadel at the curve’s extreme end, seemed a fairy castle, bluey, dreamlike and vague, amidst the rosy mist on the horizon. But Claude and Christine, with the sunlight streaming on them, athwart the leafless plane trees, turned away from the dazzlement, preferring to gaze at certain spots, one above all—a block of old houses just above the Mail. Below, there was a series of one-storied tenements, little huckster and fishing-tackle shops, with flat terrace roofs, ornamented with laurel and Virginia creeper. And in the rear rose loftier, but decrepit, dwellings, with linen hung out to dry at their windows, a collection of fantastic structures, a confused mass of woodwork and masonry, overtoppling walls, and hanging gardens, in which coloured glass balls shone out like stars. They walked on, leaving behind them the big barracks and the Hôtel de Ville, and feeling much more interest in the Cité which appeared across the river, pent between lofty smooth embankments rising from the water. Above the darkened houses rose the towers of Notre-Dame, as resplendent as if they had been newly gilt. Then the second-hand bookstalls began to invade the quays. Down below a lighter full of charcoal struggled against the strong current beneath an arch of the Pont Notre-Dame. And then, on the days when the flower market was held, they stopped, despite the inclement weather, to inhale the scent of the first violets and the early gillyflowers. On their left a long stretch of bank now became visible; beyond the pepper-caster turrets of the Palais de Justice, the small, murky tenements of the Quai de l’Horloge showed as far as the clump of trees midway across the Pont-Neuf; then, as they went farther on, other quays emerged from the mist, in the far distance: the Quai Voltaire, the Quai Malaquais, the dome of the Institute of France, the square pile of the Mint, a long grey line of frontages of which they could not even distinguish the windows, a promontory of roofs, which, with their stacks of chimney-pots, looked like some rugged cliff, dipping down into a phosphorescent sea. In front, however, the Pavillon de Flore lost its dreamy aspect, and became solidified in the final sun blaze. Then right and left, on either bank of the river, came the long vistas of the Boulevard de Sebastopol and the Boulevard du Palais; the handsome new buildings of the Quai de la Megisserie, with the new Prefecture of Police across the water; and the old Pont-Neuf, with its statue of Henri IV. looking like a splash of ink. The Louvre, the Tuileries followed, and beyond Grenelle there was a far-stretching panorama of the slopes of Sevres, the country steeped in a stream of sun rays. Claude never went farther. Christine always made him stop just before they reached the Pont Royal, near the fine trees beside Vigier’s swimming baths; and when they turned round to shake hands once more in the golden sunset now flushing into crimson, they looked back and, on the horizon, espied the Isle Saint Louis, whence they had come, the indistinct distance of the city upon which night was already descending from the slate-hued eastern sky.
Since the chilly December air settled in, Christine only came in the afternoons, and it was around four o'clock, as the sun began to set, that Claude walked her home on his arm. On clear days, they could see the long line of quays stretching out as soon as they crossed the Pont Louis-Philippe. The slanting sunlight dusted the houses on the right bank with a golden glow, while on the left, the islands and buildings stood out as a dark line against the brilliant sunset. Between the dark and the bright edges, the sparkling river shimmered, periodically segmented by the long spans of its bridges; the five arches of the Pont Notre-Dame visible beneath the single span of the Pont d’Arcole; then the Pont-au-Change and the Pont-Neuf, with each shadow revealing a bright patch, a sheet of bluish, silky water, fading to lighter shades here and there with reflective surfaces. As the darker outlines on the left ended in the pointed towers of the Palais de Justice, clearly defined against the sky, a gentle curve rolled on the right, stretching so far that the Pavillon de Flore, standing out like a fortress at the curve's far end, looked like a fairy tale castle—blueish, dreamy, and vague—amidst the rosy mist on the horizon. But Claude and Christine, with sunlight streaming down on them, woven through the leafless trees, turned away from the bright light, preferring to look at specific spots, especially one—a block of old houses just above the Mail. Below, there was a series of one-story buildings, small shops and fishing-tackle stores, with flat terrace roofs adorned with laurel and Virginia creeper. Behind them rose taller, but rundown, homes, with laundry hanging out to dry from their windows, a jumbled collection of unusual structures, a chaotic mix of wood and brick, tilting walls, and hanging gardens, with colorful glass balls shining like stars. They continued on, leaving behind the large barracks and the Hôtel de Ville, much more interested in the Cité appearing across the river, squeezed between the tall smooth embankments rising from the water. Above the shadowed houses towered Notre-Dame, shining as if it had been recently gilded. Then the second-hand book stalls began to pop up along the quays. Down below, a barge loaded with charcoal battled against the strong current under an arch of the Pont Notre-Dame. On days when the flower market was held, they paused, regardless of the chilly weather, to breathe in the scent of the first violets and early gillyflowers. To their left, a long stretch of bank became visible; past the pepper-pot towers of the Palais de Justice, the small, murky tenements of the Quai de l’Horloge extended to the cluster of trees halfway across the Pont-Neuf; as they walked further, more quays emerged from the mist in the distance: the Quai Voltaire, the Quai Malaquais, the dome of the Institute of France, the square-form Mint, a long gray line of buildings where they couldn't even see the windows, a ridge of rooftops, which, with their stacks of chimney-pots, resembled a rugged cliff, cascading into a phosphorescent sea. However, in front of them, the Pavillon de Flore lost its dreamlike quality and became solid in the last burst of sunlight. Then, on both banks of the river, came the long views of the Boulevard de Sebastopol and the Boulevard du Palais; the chic new buildings of the Quai de la Megisserie, with the new Prefecture of Police across the water; and the old Pont-Neuf, with its statue of Henri IV. looking like a splash of ink. The Louvre, the Tuileries followed, and beyond Grenelle was an expansive view of the slopes of Sevres, the countryside bathed in flowing sunlight. Claude never ventured further. Christine always made him stop just before they reached the Pont Royal, near the beautiful trees beside Vigier’s swimming baths; and as they turned to shake hands once more in the golden sunset transforming to crimson, they looked back and spotted the Isle Saint Louis in the distance from which they had come, the blurry outline of the city where night was already descending from the slate-gray eastern sky.
Ah! what splendid sunsets they beheld during those weekly strolls. The sun accompanied them, as it were, amid the throbbing gaiety of the quays, the river life, the dancing ripples of the currents; amid the attractions of the shops, as warm as conservatories, the flowers sold by the seed merchants, and the noisy cages of the bird fanciers; amid all the din of sound and wealth of colour which ever make a city’s waterside its youthful part. As they proceeded, the ardent blaze of the western sky turned to purple on their left, above the dark line of houses, and the orb of day seemed to wait for them, falling gradually lower, slowly rolling towards the distant roofs when once they had passed the Pont Notre-Dame in front of the widening stream. In no ancient forest, on no mountain road, beyond no grassy plain will there ever be such triumphal sunsets as behind the cupola of the Institute. It is there one sees Paris retiring to rest in all her glory. At each of their walks the aspect of the conflagration changed; fresh furnaces added their glow to the crown of flames. One evening, when a shower had surprised them, the sun, showing behind the downpour, lit up the whole rain cloud, and upon their heads there fell a spray of glowing water, irisated with pink and azure. On the days when the sky was clear, however, the sun, like a fiery ball, descended majestically in an unruffled sapphire lake; for a moment the black cupola of the Institute seemed to cut away part of it and make it look like the waning moon; then the globe assumed a violet tinge and at last became submerged in the lake, which had turned blood-red. Already, in February, the planet described a wider curve, and fell straight into the Seine, which seemed to seethe on the horizon as at the contact of red-hot iron. However, the grander scenes, the vast fairy pictures of space only blazed on cloudy evenings. Then, according to the whim of the wind, there were seas of sulphur splashing against coral reefs; there were palaces and towers, marvels of architecture, piled upon one another, burning and crumbling, and throwing torrents of lava from their many gaps; or else the orb which had disappeared, hidden by a veil of clouds, suddenly transpierced that veil with such a press of light that shafts of sparks shot forth from one horizon to the other, showing as plainly as a volley of golden arrows. And then the twilight fell, and they said good-bye to each other, while their eyes were still full of the final dazzlement. They felt that triumphal Paris was the accomplice of the joy which they could not exhaust, the joy of ever resuming together that walk beside the old stone parapets.
Ah! What amazing sunsets they witnessed during those weekly walks. The sun seemed to join them, amid the vibrant energy of the quays, the lively river, and the dancing ripples of the currents; surrounded by the inviting shops, as warm as greenhouses, the flowers sold by the seed vendors, and the noisy cages of bird lovers; amidst all the noise and colorful sights that make a city’s waterside its lively heart. As they walked, the fiery glow of the western sky turned purple to their left, over the dark outline of buildings, and the sun appeared to wait for them, gradually sinking lower, slowly rolling toward the distant rooftops after they passed the Pont Notre-Dame in front of the widening river. In no ancient forest, on no mountain road, or across any grassy plain will there ever be such magnificent sunsets as behind the dome of the Institute. It’s here one can see Paris settling down in all her glory. With each walk, the scene of the sunset changed; new sources of light added their blaze to the crown of flames. One evening, when a shower caught them off guard, the sun peeked through the downpour, illuminating the whole rain cloud, and a spray of glowing water fell upon them, shimmering with pink and blue. On clear days, however, the sun, like a fiery ball, descended majestically into a calm sapphire lake; for a moment, the black dome of the Institute appeared to slice a part of it away, making it look like a waning moon; then the globe took on a violet hue and eventually sank into the lake, which had turned blood-red. By February, the planet traced a wider arc and fell straight into the Seine, which seemed to bubble on the horizon like red-hot iron. Yet, the grander scenes, the vast fairy-tale images of space erupted only on cloudy evenings. Then, depending on the wind's whims, there were seas of yellow splashing against coral reefs; there were palaces and towers, marvels of architecture, piled high, burning and crumbling, pouring torrents of lava from their many gaps; or else the orb that had disappeared, hidden behind a veil of clouds, suddenly pierced that veil with such a burst of light that beams of sparks shot from one horizon to the other, clearly visible like a shower of golden arrows. And then twilight arrived, and they said goodbye to each other, their eyes still filled with the last dazzling light. They felt that triumphant Paris was a partner in the joy that they couldn't get enough of, the joy of always walking together beside the old stone parapets.
One day, however, there happened what Claude had always secretly feared. Christine no longer seemed to believe in the possibility of meeting anybody who knew her. In fact, was there such a person? She would always pass along like this, remaining altogether unknown. He, however, thought of his own friends, and at times felt a kind of tremor when he fancied he recognised in the distance the back of some acquaintance. He was troubled by a feeling of delicacy; the idea that somebody might stare at the girl, approach them, and perhaps begin to joke, gave him intolerable worry. And that very evening, as she was close beside him on his arm, and they were approaching the Pont des Arts, he fell upon Sandoz and Dubuche, who were coming down the steps of the bridge. It was impossible to avoid them, they were almost face to face; besides, his friends must have seen him, for they smiled. Claude, very pale, kept advancing, and he thought it all up on seeing Dubuche take a step towards him; but Sandoz was already holding the architect back, and leading him away. They passed on with an indifferent air and disappeared into the courtyard of the Louvre without as much as turning round. They had both just recognised the original of the crayon sketch, which the painter hid away with all the jealousy of a lover. Christine, who was chattering, had noticed nothing. Claude, with his heart throbbing, answered her in monosyllables, moved to tears, brimming over with gratitude to his old chums for their discreet behaviour.
One day, though, what Claude had always secretly feared happened. Christine no longer seemed to believe anyone would recognize her. In fact, was there even such a person? She would just keep passing by, completely unknown. He, on the other hand, thought of his own friends and sometimes felt a shiver when he thought he saw someone he knew in the distance. He was troubled by a sense of delicacy; the idea that someone might look at her, come up to them, and maybe start joking around made him incredibly anxious. That very evening, as she was right next to him on his arm and they were heading towards the Pont des Arts, he ran into Sandoz and Dubuche, who were coming down the bridge steps. There was no way to avoid them; they were almost face-to-face. Besides, his friends must have spotted him because they smiled. Claude, looking very pale, kept walking forward as he saw Dubuche take a step toward him, but Sandoz was already holding the architect back and pulling him away. They passed by with an indifferent attitude and disappeared into the Louvre courtyard without even looking back. They had both just realized who the original of the crayon sketch was, which the painter guarded jealously like a lover. Christine, who was chatting away, didn't notice anything. Claude, his heart racing, answered her with single words, moved to tears and filled with gratitude towards his old friends for their discreet behavior.
A few days later, however, he had another shock. He did not expect Christine, and had therefore made an appointment with Sandoz. Then, as she had run up to spend an hour—it was one of those surprises that delighted them—they had just withdrawn the key, as usual, when there came a familiar knock with the fist on the door. Claude at once recognised the rap, and felt so upset at the mishap that he overturned a chair. After that it was impossible to pretend to be out. But Christine turned so pale, and implored him with such a wild gesture, that he remained rooted to the spot, holding his breath. The knocks continued, and a voice called, ‘Claude, Claude!’ He still remained quite still, debating with himself, however, with ashen lips and downcast eyes. Deep silence reigned, and then footsteps were heard, making the stairs creak as they went down. Claude’s breast heaved with intense sadness; he felt it bursting with remorse at the sound of each retreating step, as if he had denied the friendship of his whole youth.
A few days later, though, he experienced another shock. He wasn’t expecting Christine and had made plans to meet Sandoz instead. Then, just as she had rushed over to spend an hour with him—it was one of those surprises that made them both happy—they had just locked the door when there was a familiar knock. Claude instantly recognized the knock and was so thrown off by the situation that he knocked over a chair. After that, it was impossible to pretend they weren't home. But Christine looked so pale and pleaded with such frantic gestures that he stood frozen in place, holding his breath. The knocking continued, and a voice called out, ‘Claude, Claude!’ He remained completely still, torn between his thoughts, his lips pale and his eyes downcast. A deep silence took over, and then footsteps were heard as they creaked down the stairs. Claude's chest surged with deep sadness; he felt like it was bursting with regret at the sound of each fading step, as if he had turned his back on the friendship of his entire youth.
However, one afternoon there came another knock, and Claude had only just time to whisper despairingly, ‘The key has been left in the door.’
However, one afternoon there was another knock, and Claude only had time to whisper in despair, ‘The key has been left in the door.’
In fact, Christine had forgotten to take it out. She became quite scared and darted behind the screen, with her handkerchief over her mouth to stifle the sound of her breathing.
In fact, Christine had completely forgotten to take it out. She got really scared and quickly hid behind the screen, covering her mouth with her handkerchief to muffle her breathing.
The knocks became louder, there was a burst of laughter, and the painter had to reply, ‘Come in.’
The knocks got louder, followed by a burst of laughter, and the painter had to respond, ‘Come in.’
He felt more uncomfortable still when he saw Jory, who gallantly ushered in Irma Bécot, whose acquaintance he had made through Fagerolles, and who was flinging her youth about the Paris studios.
He felt even more uncomfortable when he saw Jory, who confidently welcomed Irma Bécot, someone he had met through Fagerolles, and who was radiating her youth around the Paris studios.
‘She insisted upon seeing your studio, so I brought her,’ explained the journalist.
‘She insisted on seeing your studio, so I took her,’ explained the journalist.
The girl, however, without waiting, was already walking about and making remarks, with perfect freedom of manner. ‘Oh! how funny it is here. And what funny painting. Come, there’s a good fellow, show me everything. I want to see everything.’
The girl, however, without hesitation, was already walking around and commenting with complete ease. ‘Oh! This place is so funny. And what a strange painting. Come on, be a good sport and show me everything. I want to see it all.’
Claude, apprehensively anxious, was afraid that she might push the screen aside. He pictured Christine behind it, and felt distracted already at what she might hear.
Claude, nervously anxious, was worried that she might push the screen aside. He imagined Christine behind it and felt distracted already by what she might hear.
‘You know what she has come to ask of you?’ resumed Jory cheerfully. ‘What, don’t you remember? You promised that she might pose for something. And she’ll do so if you like.’
‘Do you know what she’s come to ask you?’ Jory continued happily. ‘What? Don’t you remember? You promised she could pose for something. And she’s willing to do it if you want her to.’
‘Of course I will,’ said Irma.
‘Of course I will,’ Irma said.
‘The fact is,’ replied Claude, in an embarrassed tone, ‘my picture here will take up all my time till the Salon. I have a figure in it that gives me a deal of trouble. It’s impossible to perfect it with those confounded models.’
‘The thing is,’ replied Claude, sounding embarrassed, ‘this painting here is going to take up all my time until the Salon. I have a figure in it that’s really giving me a hard time. It’s impossible to get it right with those annoying models.’
Irma had stationed herself in front of the picture, and looked at it with a knowing air. ‘Oh! I see,’ she said, ‘that woman in the grass, eh? Do you think I could be of any use to you?’
Irma had positioned herself in front of the picture and was looking at it knowingly. "Oh! I get it," she said, "that woman in the grass, huh? Do you think I could help you with anything?"
Jory flared up in a moment, warmly approving the idea, but Claude with the greatest energy replied, ‘No, no madame wouldn’t suit. She is not at all what I want for this picture; not at all.’
Jory quickly got excited and agreed with the idea, but Claude firmly replied, ‘No, no, she wouldn't fit. She's not at all what I want for this picture; not at all.’
Then he went on stammering excuses. He would be only too pleased later on, but just now he was afraid that another model would quite complete his confusion over that picture; and Irma responded by shrugging her shoulders, and looking at him with an air of smiling contempt.
Then he kept stumbling over excuses. He would be more than happy later, but right now he was worried that another model would just add to his confusion about that picture; and Irma reacted by shrugging her shoulders and looking at him with a smirk of disdain.
Jory, however, now began to chat about their friends. Why had not Claude come to Sandoz’s on the previous Thursday? One never saw him now. Dubuche asserted all sorts of things about him. There had been a row between Fagerolles and Mahoudeau on the subject whether evening dress was a thing to be reproduced in sculpture. Then on the previous Sunday Gagnière had returned home from a Wagner concert with a black eye. He, Jory, had nearly had a duel at the Café Baudequin on account of one of his last articles in ‘The Drummer.’ The fact was he was giving it hot to the twopenny-halfpenny painters, the men with the usurped reputations! The campaign against the hanging committee of the Salon was making a deuce of a row; not a shred would be left of those guardians of the ideal, who wanted to prevent nature from entering their show.
Jory, however, started talking about their friends. Why hadn't Claude come to Sandoz’s last Thursday? No one ever saw him anymore. Dubuche was claiming all kinds of things about him. There had been a fight between Fagerolles and Mahoudeau over whether evening dress should be represented in sculpture. Then, the previous Sunday, Gagnière came home from a Wagner concert with a black eye. Jory had almost gotten into a duel at Café Baudequin because of one of his recent articles in 'The Drummer.' The truth was, he was really going after the mediocre painters, the ones with stolen reputations! The campaign against the Salon's hanging committee was causing quite a stir; those so-called guardians of the ideal, who wanted to keep nature out of their exhibition, would be left with nothing!
Claude listened to him with impatient irritation. He had taken up his palette and was shuffling about in front of his picture. The other one understood at last.
Claude listened to him with growing irritation. He had picked up his palette and was moving around in front of his painting. The other one finally understood.
‘You want to work, I see; all right, we’ll leave you.’
‘You want to work, I get it; okay, we’ll leave you.’
Irma, however, still stared at the painter, with her vague smile, astonished at the stupidity of this simpleton, who did not seem to appreciate her, and seized despite herself with a whim to please him. His studio was ugly, and he himself wasn’t handsome; but why should he put on such bugbear airs? She chaffed him for a moment, and on going off again offered to sit for him, emphasising her offer by warmly pressing his hand.
Irma, however, continued to gaze at the painter with her vague smile, amazed by the foolishness of this simpleton, who didn’t seem to recognize her worth, and despite herself, felt a sudden urge to impress him. His studio was ugly, and he wasn’t attractive; but why did he act so high and mighty? She teased him for a bit, and as she left, she offered to pose for him, accentuating her offer by warmly squeezing his hand.
‘Whenever you like,’ were her parting words.
“Whenever you want,” were her last words.
They had gone at last, and Claude was obliged to pull the screen aside, for Christine, looking very white, remained seated behind it, as if she lacked the strength to rise. She did not say a word about the girl, but simply declared that she had felt very frightened; and—trembling lest there should come another knock—she wanted to go at once, carrying away with her, as her startled looks testified, the disturbing thought of many things which she did not mention.
They had finally left, and Claude had to pull the screen aside because Christine, looking pale, was still sitting behind it, as if she didn’t have the strength to stand up. She didn’t say anything about the girl but simply said she had been really scared; and—shaking at the thought that another knock might come—she wanted to leave immediately, taking with her, as her anxious expressions showed, the unsettling thoughts of many things she didn’t mention.
In fact, for a long time that sphere of brutal art, that studio full of glaring pictures, had caused her a feeling of discomfort. Wounded in all her feelings, full of repugnance, she could not get used to it all. She had grown up full of affectionate admiration for a very different style of art—her mother’s fine water-colours, those fans of dreamy delicacy, in which lilac-tinted couples floated about in bluish gardens—and she quite failed to understand Claude’s work. Even now she often amused herself by painting tiny girlish landscapes, two or three subjects repeated over and over again—a lake with a ruin, a water-mill beating a stream, a chalet and some pine trees, white with snow. And she felt surprised that an intelligent young fellow should paint in such an unreasonable manner, so ugly and so untruthful besides. For she not only thought Claude’s realism monstrously ugly, but considered it beyond every permissible truth. In fact, she thought at times that he must be mad.
For a long time, that brutal art scene, that studio filled with harsh images, made her uncomfortable. Hurt and repulsed, she just couldn't adjust to it all. She had grown up with a deep admiration for a much different style of art—her mother’s beautiful watercolors, those delicate fans where lilac-hued couples drifted through blue gardens—and she simply didn’t get Claude’s work. Even now, she often entertained herself by painting small, feminine landscapes, repeating the same two or three subjects over and over—a lake with a ruin, a water mill on a stream, a chalet with some snow-covered pine trees. She was puzzled that an intelligent young man would paint in such an unreasonable, ugly, and dishonest way. Not only did she find Claude’s realism incredibly ugly, but she also believed it strayed far from any acceptable truth. At times, she even thought he must be insane.
One day Claude absolutely insisted upon seeing a small sketch-book which she had brought away from Clermont, and which she had spoken about. After objecting for a long while, she brought it with her, flattered at heart and feeling very curious to know what he would say. He turned over the leaves, smiling all the while, and as he did not speak, she was the first to ask:
One day, Claude really insisted on seeing a small sketchbook she had brought back from Clermont and had talked about. After resisting for a while, she finally brought it with her, feeling flattered and very curious about what he would say. He flipped through the pages, smiling the whole time, and since he didn’t say anything, she was the first to ask:
‘You think it very bad, don’t you?’
‘You think it’s really bad, don’t you?’
‘Not at all,’ he replied. ‘It’s innocent.’
‘Not at all,’ he replied. ‘It’s harmless.’
The reply hurt her, despite Claude’s indulgent tone, which aimed at making it amiable.
The response hurt her, even though Claude's gentle tone was meant to make it friendly.
‘Well, you see I had so few lessons from mamma. I like painting to be well done, and pleasing.’
‘Well, you see, I had very few lessons from my mom. I like painting to be done well and to look nice.’
Thereupon he burst into frank laughter.
Then he burst into genuine laughter.
‘Confess now that my painting makes you feel ill! I have noticed it. You purse your lips and open your eyes wide with fright. Certainly it is not the style of painting for ladies, least of all for young girls. But you’ll get used to it; it’s only a question of educating your eyes and you’ll end by seeing that what I am doing is very honest and healthy.’
‘Admit it, my painting makes you uncomfortable! I can tell. You tighten your lips and widen your eyes in fear. It’s definitely not the kind of art meant for women, especially not for young girls. But you’ll get used to it; it just takes some time to train your eyes, and you'll eventually see that what I’m creating is very genuine and healthy.’
Indeed, Christine slowly became used to it. But, at first, artistic conviction had nothing to do with the change, especially as Claude, with his contempt for female opinion, did not take the trouble to indoctrinate her. On the contrary, in her company he avoided conversing about art, as if he wished to retain for himself that passion of his life, apart from the new passion which was gradually taking possession of him. Still, Christine glided into the habit of the thing, and became familiarised with it; she began to feel interested in those abominable pictures, on noticing the important place they held in the artist’s existence. This was the first stage on the road to conversion; she felt greatly moved by his rageful eagerness to be up and doing, the whole-heartedness with which he devoted himself to his work. Was it not very touching? Was there not something very creditable in it? Then, on noticing his joy or suffering, according to the success or the failure of the day’s work, she began to associate herself with his efforts. She felt saddened when she found him sad, she grew cheerful when he received her cheerfully; and from that moment her worry was—had he done a lot of work? was he satisfied with what he had done since they had last seen each other? At the end of the second month she had been gained over; she stationed herself before his pictures to judge whether they were progressing or not. She no longer felt afraid of them. She still did not approve particularly of that style of painting, but she began to repeat the artistic expressions which she had heard him use; declared this bit to be ‘vigorous in tone,’ ‘well built up,’ or ‘just in the light it should be.’ He seemed to her so good-natured, and she was so fond of him, that after finding excuses for him for daubing those horrors, she ended by discovering qualities in them in order that she might like them a little also.
Indeed, Christine gradually got used to it. But at first, her artistic understanding had nothing to do with the change, especially since Claude, with his disdain for female perspectives, didn’t bother to educate her. On the contrary, he avoided talking about art when they were together, as if he wanted to keep that passion for himself, separate from the new passion that was slowly taking over him. Still, Christine became accustomed to it and started to take an interest in those terrible paintings when she noticed how significant they were in the artist's life. This was the first step toward her transformation; she was deeply moved by his intense desire to be productive and the dedication he put into his work. Wasn’t it very touching? Wasn’t there something admirable about it? Then, by observing his happiness or distress based on the success or failure of his daily work, she began to connect with his struggles. She felt sad when he was sad, happy when he was cheerful; from that moment on, she was concerned—had he done a lot of work? Was he satisfied with what he had created since they last met? By the end of the second month, she was completely won over; she would stand in front of his paintings to assess whether they were improving. She no longer felt afraid of them. Although she still didn’t particularly approve of that style of painting, she started to repeat the artistic terms she had heard him use; she described this part as ‘strong in tone,’ ‘well-structured,’ or ‘just right in terms of lighting.’ He seemed so kind-hearted to her, and she cared for him so much that after justifying his creation of those awful pieces, she ended up finding qualities in them so she could like them a little too.
Nevertheless, there was one picture, the large one, the one intended for the Salon, to which for a long while she was quite unable to reconcile herself. She already looked without dislike at the studies made at the Boutin studio and the sketches of Plassans, but she was still irritated by the sight of the woman lying in the grass. It was like a personal grudge, the shame of having momentarily thought that she could detect in it a likeness of herself, and silent embarrassment, too, for that big figure continued to wound her feelings, although she now found less and less of a resemblance in it. At first she had protested by averting her eyes. Now she remained for several minutes looking at it fixedly, in mute contemplation. How was it that the likeness to herself had disappeared? The more vigorously that Claude struggled on, never satisfied, touching up the same bit a hundred times over, the more did that likeness to herself gradually fade away. And, without being able to account for it, without daring to admit as much to herself, she, whom the painting had so greatly offended when she had first seen it, now felt a growing sorrow at noticing that nothing of herself remained.
Nevertheless, there was one painting, the large one meant for the Salon, that she just couldn't come to terms with for quite some time. She had started to view the studies from the Boutin studio and Plassans' sketches with less dislike, but she still felt irritated by the image of the woman lying in the grass. It felt like a personal grudge, the embarrassment of having briefly thought she saw a resemblance to herself, and a silent discomfort, too, as that large figure continued to sting her feelings, even though she increasingly saw less of herself in it. At first, she protested by looking away. Now, she spent several minutes staring at it intently, lost in thought. How had the resemblance to herself faded? The more Claude worked on it, never satisfied and touching up the same section a hundred times, the more that similarity to her slowly disappeared. And, without being able to explain it, without daring to admit it to herself, she, who had been so offended by the painting when she first saw it, now felt a growing sadness at realizing that nothing of her remained.
Indeed it seemed to her as if their friendship suffered from this obliteration; she felt herself further away from him as trait after trait vanished. Didn’t he care for her that he thus allowed her to be effaced from his work? And who was the new woman, whose was the unknown indistinct face that appeared from beneath hers?
Indeed, it seemed to her that their friendship was suffering because of this erasure; she felt herself growing more distant from him as each quality faded away. Didn't he care for her if he let her be removed from his work like this? And who was the new woman? Who was the unknown, blurry face that emerged from beneath hers?
Claude, in despair at having spoilt the figure’s head, did not know exactly how to ask her for a few hours’ sitting. She would merely have had to sit down, and he would only have taken some hints. But he had previously seen her so pained that he felt afraid of irritating her again. Moreover, after resolving in his own mind to ask her this favour in a gay, off-hand way, he had been at a loss for words, feeling all at once ashamed at the notion.
Claude, feeling hopeless about ruining the figure’s head, didn’t know how to ask her for a few hours of sitting. She simply needed to sit down, and he could have taken some pointers. But he had seen her so upset before that he was afraid of annoying her again. Plus, after deciding to ask her for this favor in a light and casual manner, he suddenly couldn't find the words and felt embarrassed by the idea.
One afternoon he quite upset her by one of those bursts of anger which he found it impossible to control, even in her presence. Everything had gone wrong that week; he talked of scraping his canvas again, and he paced up and down, beside himself, and kicking the furniture about. Then all of a sudden he caught her by the shoulders, and made her sit down on the couch.
One afternoon, he really upset her with one of those outbursts of anger that he couldn't control, even when she was around. Everything had gone wrong that week; he talked about scraping his canvas again, pacing back and forth, totally worked up, and kicking the furniture. Then suddenly, he grabbed her by the shoulders and made her sit down on the couch.
‘I beg of you, do me this favour, or it’ll kill me, I swear it will.’
‘I’m begging you, please do me this favor, or it’ll ruin me, I swear it will.’
She did not understand him.
She didn’t understand him.
‘What—what is it you want?’
"What do you want?"
Then as soon as she saw him take up his brushes, she added, without heeding what she said, ‘Ah, yes! Why did not you ask me before?’
Then as soon as she saw him pick up his brushes, she added, without thinking about what she was saying, ‘Ah, yes! Why didn’t you ask me earlier?’
And of her own accord she threw herself back on a cushion and slipped her arm under her neck. But surprise and confusion at having yielded so quickly made her grave, for she did not know that she was prepared for this kind of thing; indeed, she could have sworn that she would never serve him as a model again. Her compliance already filled her with remorse, as if she were lending herself to something wrong by letting him impart her own countenance to that big creature, lying refulgent under the sun.
And on her own, she threw herself back onto a cushion and slipped her arm under her neck. But surprise and confusion at giving in so quickly made her serious, because she didn't realize she was ready for this sort of thing; in fact, she could have sworn she would never be his model again. Her willingness already filled her with regret, as if she were getting involved in something wrong by letting him use her own face on that huge creature, lying bright under the sun.
However, in two sittings, Claude worked in the head all right. He exulted with delight, and exclaimed that it was the best bit of painting he had ever done; and he was right, never had he thrown such a play of real light over such a life-like face. Happy at seeing him so pleased, Christine also became gay, going as far as to express approval of her head, which, though not extremely like her, had a wonderful expression. They stood for a long while before the picture, blinking at it, and drawing back as far as the wall.
However, in two sessions, Claude worked on the head just fine. He was overjoyed and declared it was the best painting he had ever done; he was right—he had never captured such a genuine play of light on such a lifelike face. Happy to see him so pleased, Christine also became cheerful, even going so far as to say she liked her head, which, although not extremely similar to her, had a wonderful expression. They stood for a long time in front of the picture, squinting at it and stepping back as far as the wall.
‘And now,’ he said at last, ‘I’ll finish her off with a model. Ah! so I’ve got her at last.’
‘And now,’ he said finally, ‘I’ll wrap this up with a model. Ah! so I finally have her.’
In a burst of childish glee, he took the girl round the waist, and they performed ‘a triumphant war dance,’ as he called it. She laughed very heartily, fond of romping as she was, and no longer feeling aught of her scruples and discomfort.
In a burst of childish joy, he wrapped his arms around the girl's waist, and they did what he called "a triumphant war dance." She laughed genuinely, enjoying the playful moment and no longer feeling any of her doubts or discomfort.
But the very next week Claude became gloomy again. He had chosen Zoé Piedefer as a model, but she did not satisfy him. Christine’s delicate head, as he expressed it, did not set well on the other’s shoulders. He, nevertheless, persisted, scratched out, began anew, and worked so hard that he lived in a constant state of fever. Towards the middle of January, seized with despair, he abandoned his picture and turned it against the wall, swearing that he would not finish it. But a fortnight later, he began to work at it again with another model, and then found himself obliged to change the whole tone of it. Thus matters got still worse; so he sent for Zoé again; became altogether at sea, and quite ill with uncertainty and anguish. And the pity of it was, that the central figure alone worried him, for he was well satisfied with the rest of the painting, the trees of the background, the two little women and the gentleman in the velvet coat, all finished and vigorous. February was drawing to a close; he had only a few days left to send his picture to the Salon; it was quite a disaster.
But the very next week, Claude became gloomy again. He had picked Zoé Piedefer as a model, but she didn’t satisfy him. Christine’s delicate face, as he put it, didn’t look right on Zoé’s shoulders. Still, he kept at it, scratched things out, started over, and worked so hard that he was in a constant state of anxiety. By mid-January, overwhelmed with despair, he abandoned his painting and turned it to face the wall, swearing that he wouldn’t finish it. But two weeks later, he started working on it again with a different model, which forced him to change the entire tone of the piece. Things got even worse; so he called Zoé back again, found himself completely lost, and felt sick with uncertainty and anguish. The sad part was that only the central figure troubled him, as he was happy with the rest of the painting—the trees in the background, the two little women, and the gentleman in the velvet coat—all finished and vibrant. February was ending; he had only a few days left to submit his painting to the Salon; it was a complete disaster.
One evening, in Christine’s presence, he began swearing, and all at once a cry of fury escaped him: ‘After all, by the thunder of heaven, is it possible to stick one woman’s head on another’s shoulders? I ought to chop my hand off.’
One evening, while Christine was there, he started cursing, and suddenly a shout of rage burst from him: "Seriously, by the thunder of heaven, is it even possible to put one woman's head on another's shoulders? I should just chop my hand off."
From the depths of his heart a single idea now rose to his brain: to obtain her consent to pose for the whole figure. It had slowly sprouted, first as a simple wish, quickly discarded as absurd; then had come a silent, constantly-renewed debate with himself; and at last, under the spur of necessity, keen and definite desire. The recollection of the morning after the storm, when she had accepted his hospitality, haunted and tortured him. It was she whom he needed; she alone could enable him to realise his dream, and he beheld her again in all her youthful freshness, beaming and indispensable. If he could not get her to pose, he might as well give up his picture, for no one else would ever satisfy him. At times, while he remained seated for hours, distracted in front of the unfinished canvas, so utterly powerless that he no longer knew where to give a stroke of the brush, he formed heroic resolutions. The moment she came in he would throw himself at her feet; he would tell her of his distress in such touching words that she would perhaps consent. But as soon as he beheld her, he lost all courage, he averted his eyes, lest she might decipher his thoughts in his instinctive glances. Such a request would be madness. One could not expect such a service from a friend; he would never have the audacity to ask.
From the depths of his heart, a single idea rose to his mind: to get her permission to pose for the full figure. It had slowly grown, starting as a simple wish that he quickly dismissed as ridiculous; then came a silent, ongoing debate with himself; and finally, driven by necessity, it turned into a strong and clear desire. He was haunted and tormented by the memory of the morning after the storm when she had accepted his hospitality. She was the one he needed; only she could help him achieve his dream, and he envisioned her again in all her youthful vibrancy, shining and essential. If he couldn't persuade her to pose, he might as well give up on his painting, because no one else would ever satisfy him. Sometimes, while he sat for hours, lost in thought in front of the unfinished canvas, feeling so powerless that he didn't even know where to place the brush, he made bold resolutions. The moment she entered, he would throw himself at her feet; he would express his distress in such heartfelt words that she might agree. But as soon as he saw her, he lost all his courage, looking away so she wouldn’t read his thoughts in his instinctive glances. Such a request would be crazy. You couldn’t expect a favor like that from a friend; he would never have the guts to ask.
Nevertheless, one evening as he was getting ready to accompany her, and as she was putting on her bonnet, with her arms uplifted, they remained for a moment looking into each other’s eyes, he quivering, and she suddenly becoming so grave, so pale, that he felt himself detected. All along the quays they scarcely spoke; the matter remained unmentioned between them while the sun set in the coppery sky. Twice afterwards he again read in her looks that she was aware of his all-absorbing thought. In fact, since he had dreamt about it, she had began to do the same, in spite of herself, her attention roused by his involuntary allusions. They scarcely affected her at first, though she was obliged at last to notice them; still the question seemed to her to be beyond the range of possibility, to be one of those unavowable ideas which people do not even speak of. The fear that he would dare to ask her did not even occur to her; she knew him well by now; she could have silenced him with a gesture, before he had stammered the first words, and in spite of his sudden bursts of anger. It was simple madness. Never, never!
Nevertheless, one evening as he was getting ready to go with her, and while she was putting on her bonnet with her arms raised, they paused for a moment to look into each other’s eyes, he trembling, and she suddenly becoming so serious, so pale, that he felt exposed. They barely spoke along the quays; the subject remained untouched between them as the sun set in the coppery sky. Twice later, he again saw in her expression that she was aware of his consuming thoughts. In fact, ever since he had dreamed about it, she had started to think about it too, despite herself, her attention caught by his unintentional hints. They barely affected her at first, though she eventually had to acknowledge them; still, the question seemed too far-fetched, one of those unmentionable ideas that people don't even discuss. The fear that he might actually ask her never crossed her mind; she knew him well by now; she could have silenced him with a gesture before he even stuttered out the first words, despite his sudden fits of anger. It was pure madness. Never, never!
Days went by, and between them that fixed idea grew in intensity. The moment they were together they could not help thinking of it. Not a word was spoken on the subject, but their very silence was eloquent; they no longer made a movement, no longer exchanged a smile without stumbling upon that thought, which they found impossible to put into words, though it filled their minds. Soon nothing but that remained in their fraternal intercourse. And the perturbation of heart and senses which they had so far avoided in the course of their familiar intimacy, came at last, under the influence of the all-besetting thought. And then the anguish which they left unmentioned, but which they could not hide from one another, racked and stifled them, left them heaving distressfully with painful sighs.
Days passed, and in that time, the idea became more consuming. Whenever they were together, they couldn't help but think about it. They didn’t speak a word about it, but their silence spoke volumes; they could no longer move or share a smile without confronting that thought, which was impossible to articulate, yet dominated their minds. Soon, that was all that remained in their friendship. The anxiety of heart and senses they had managed to avoid during their close relationship finally surfaced, fueled by the persistent thought. The unspoken anguish they couldn’t hide from each other overwhelmed them, leaving them breathing heavily with painful sighs.
Towards the middle of March, Christine, at one of her visits, found Claude seated before his picture, overcome with sorrow. He had not even heard her enter. He remained motionless, with vacant, haggard eyes staring at his unfinished work. In another three days the delay for sending in exhibits for the Salon would expire.
Towards the middle of March, Christine, during one of her visits, found Claude sitting in front of his painting, consumed by sadness. He didn’t even notice her come in. He sat still, with empty, tired eyes fixed on his unfinished work. In just three days, the deadline for submitting pieces for the Salon would close.
‘Well,’ she inquired gently, after standing for a long time behind him, grief-stricken at seeing him in such despair.
‘Well,’ she asked softly, after standing behind him for a long time, heartbroken to see him in such distress.
He started and turned round.
He turned around.
‘Well, it’s all up. I sha’n’t exhibit anything this year. Ah! I who relied so much upon this Salon!’
‘Well, it’s all over. I won’t be showing anything this year. Ah! I who depended so much on this exhibition!’
Both relapsed into despondency—a despondency and agitation full of confused thoughts. Then she resumed, thinking aloud as it were:
Both fell back into despair—a despair and restlessness filled with jumbled thoughts. Then she continued, thinking out loud as it were:
‘There would still be time.’
"There will still be time."
‘Time? Oh! no indeed. A miracle would be needed. Where am I to find a model so late in the day? Do you know, since this morning I have been worrying, and for a moment I thought I had hit upon an idea: Yes, it would be to go and fetch that girl, that Irma who came while you were here. I know well enough that she is short and not at all such as I thought of, and so I should perhaps have to change everything once more; but all the same it might be possible to make her do. Decidedly, I’ll try her—’
‘Time? Oh no, definitely not. A miracle is needed. Where am I supposed to find a model this late in the day? You know, since this morning I’ve been stressing about it, and for a moment I thought I had a solution: Yes, I could go and get that girl, Irma, who came while you were here. I know she’s short and not at all like what I originally had in mind, so I might have to change everything again; but still, it might work. Definitely, I’ll give her a shot—’
He stopped short. The glowing eyes with which he gazed at her clearly said: ‘Ah! there’s you! ah! it would be the hoped-for miracle, and triumph would be certain, if you were to make this supreme sacrifice for me. I beseech you, I ask you devoutly, as a friend, the dearest, the most beauteous, the most pure.’
He suddenly halted. The bright eyes with which he looked at her clearly conveyed: ‘Ah! there you are! Oh! it would be the miracle I've been hoping for, and victory would be guaranteed if you made this ultimate sacrifice for me. I beg you, I earnestly ask you as a friend, the closest, the most beautiful, the most pure.’
She, erect, looking very pale, seemed to hear each of those words, though all remained unspoken, and his ardently beseeching eyes overcame her. She herself did not speak. She simply did as she was desired, acting almost like one in a dream. Beneath it all there lurked the thought that he must not ask elsewhere, for she was now conscious of her earlier jealous disquietude and wished to share his affections with none. Yet it was in silence and all chastity that she stretched herself on the couch, and took up the pose, with one arm under her head, her eyes closed.
She sat up straight, looking really pale, as if she could hear every one of those words, even though none were spoken, and his pleading eyes had a powerful effect on her. She didn't say anything. She just did what he wanted, almost like she was in a dream. Underneath it all, she thought he shouldn’t look for affection elsewhere, as she was now aware of her earlier feelings of jealousy and wanted to keep his love all to herself. Still, in silence and full of modesty, she lay back on the couch, resting one arm under her head, her eyes closed.
And Claude? Startled, full of gratitude, he had at last found again the sudden vision that he had so often evoked. But he himself did not speak; he began to paint in the deep solemn silence that had fallen upon them both. For two long hours he stood to his work with such manly energy that he finished right off a superb roughing out of the whole figure. Never before had he felt such enthusiasm in his art. It seemed to him as if he were in the presence of some saint; and at times he wondered at the transfiguration of Christine’s face, whose somewhat massive jaws seemed to have receded beneath the gentle placidity which her brow and cheeks displayed. During those two hours she did not stir, she did not speak, but from time to time she opened her clear eyes, fixing them on some vague, distant point, and remaining thus for a moment, then closing them again, and relapsing into the lifelessness of fine marble, with the mysterious fixed smile required by the pose.
And Claude? Surprised and filled with gratitude, he had finally rediscovered the sudden vision he had often imagined. But he didn’t say anything; he started to paint in the deep, solemn silence that had settled over them both. For two long hours, he worked with such determination that he quickly completed a stunning rough draft of the entire figure. He had never felt such enthusiasm for his art before. It felt like he was in the presence of a saint; at times, he marveled at the transformation of Christine’s face, whose somewhat heavy jaw seemed to have softened under the serene calmness of her brow and cheeks. During those two hours, she didn’t move or speak, but from time to time, she opened her bright eyes, staring at some vague, distant point, staying like that for a moment before closing them again and returning to the stillness of fine marble, with the mysterious, fixed smile required by the pose.
It was by a gesture that Claude apprized her he had finished. He turned away, and when they stood face to face again, she ready to depart, they gazed at one another, overcome by emotion which still prevented them from speaking. Was it sadness, then, unconscious, unnameable sadness? For their eyes filled with tears, as if they had just spoilt their lives and dived to the depths of human misery. Then, moved and grieved, unable to find a word, even of thanks, he kissed her religiously upon the brow.
It was with a gesture that Claude signaled to her that he was done. He turned away, and when they faced each other again, she was ready to leave, and they looked at each other, overwhelmed by an emotion that kept them from speaking. Was it sadness, an unrecognized, indescribable sadness? Their eyes were filled with tears, as if they had just ruined their lives and plunged into the depths of human misery. Then, feeling both moved and sorrowful, unable to find even a word of thanks, he kissed her gently on the forehead.
V
ON the 15th May, a Friday, Claude, who had returned at three o’clock in the morning from Sandoz’s, was still asleep at nine, when Madame Joseph brought him up a large bouquet of white lilac which a commissionaire had just left downstairs. He understood at once. Christine had wished to be beforehand in celebrating the success of his painting. For this was a great day for him, the opening day of the ‘Salon of the Rejected,’ which was first instituted that year,* and at which his picture—refused by the hanging committee of the official Salon—was to be exhibited.
ON May 15th, a Friday, Claude, who had come back at three in the morning from Sandoz’s, was still sleeping at nine when Madame Joseph brought him a big bouquet of white lilacs that a delivery person had just dropped off downstairs. He understood immediately. Christine wanted to get ahead of things and celebrate the success of his painting. This was a big day for him, the opening day of the ‘Salon of the Rejected,’ which was being held for the first time that year,* and his painting—rejected by the hanging committee of the official Salon—was set to be exhibited.
* This was in 1863.—ED.
This was in 1863.—ED.
That delicate attention on Christine’s part, that fresh and fragrant lilac, affected him greatly, as if presaging a happy day. Still in his nightshirt, with his feet bare, he placed the flowers in his water-jug on the table. Then, with his eyes still swollen with sleep, almost bewildered, he dressed, scolding himself the while for having slept so long. On the previous night he had promised Dubuche and Sandoz to call for them at the latter’s place at eight o’clock, in order that they might all three go together to the Palais de l’Industrie, where they would find the rest of the band. And he was already an hour behind time.
That gentle attention from Christine, that fresh and fragrant lilac, impacted him deeply, almost like a sign of a happy day ahead. Still in his nightshirt, with bare feet, he put the flowers in his water jug on the table. Then, still bleary-eyed and a bit dazed, he got dressed, scolding himself for sleeping in. The night before, he had promised Dubuche and Sandoz that he would pick them up at Sandoz’s place at eight o’clock, so they could all head to the Palais de l’Industrie together, where the rest of the group would be waiting. And he was already an hour late.
Then, as luck would have it, he could not lay his hands upon anything in his studio, which had been turned topsy-turvy since the despatch of the big picture. For more than five minutes he hunted on his knees for his shoes, among a quantity of old chases. Some particles of gold leaf flew about, for, not knowing where to get the money for a proper frame, he had employed a joiner of the neighbourhood to fit four strips of board together, and had gilded them himself, with the assistance of his friend Christine, who, by the way, had proved a very unskilful gilder. At last, dressed and shod, and having his soft felt hat bespangled with yellow sparks of the gold, he was about to go, when a superstitious thought brought him back to the nosegay, which had remained alone on the centre of the table. If he did not kiss the lilac he was sure to suffer an affront. So he kissed it and felt perfumed by its strong springtide aroma.
Then, as luck would have it, he couldn’t find anything in his studio, which was a complete mess since he sent off the big painting. He spent more than five minutes crawling around on his knees searching for his shoes among a bunch of old printing blocks. Some bits of gold leaf were floating around because, not knowing how to afford a proper frame, he had enlisted a local carpenter to put together four pieces of wood, and he had gilded them himself with help from his friend Christine, who, by the way, wasn’t very good at gilding. Finally, dressed and shod, with his soft felt hat covered in little yellow sparkles from the gold, he was about to leave when a superstitious thought made him turn back to the bouquet that had been sitting alone in the center of the table. If he didn’t kiss the lilac, he was sure to face some bad luck. So he kissed it and was enveloped by its strong spring scent.
Under the archway, he gave his key as usual to the doorkeeper. ‘Madame Joseph,’ he said, ‘I shall not be home all day.’
Under the archway, he handed his key to the doorkeeper as usual. "Madame Joseph," he said, "I won't be home all day."
In less than twenty minutes he was in the Rue d’Enfer, at Sandoz’s. But the latter, whom he feared would have already gone, was equally late in consequence of a sudden indisposition which had come upon his mother. It was nothing serious. She had merely passed a bad night, but it had for a while quite upset him with anxiety. Now, easy in mind again, Sandoz told Claude that Dubuche had written saying that they were not to wait for him, and giving an appointment at the Palais. They therefore started off, and as it was nearly eleven, they decided to lunch in a deserted little crèmerie in the Rue St. Honoré, which they did very leisurely, seized with laziness amidst all their ardent desire to see and know; and enjoying, as it were, a kind of sweet, tender sadness from lingering awhile and recalling memories of their youth.
In less than twenty minutes, he was on Rue d’Enfer, at Sandoz’s place. But Sandoz, whom he was worried might have already left, was also running late because of a sudden health issue with his mother. It wasn’t anything serious. She had just had a rough night, but it really stressed him out for a bit. Now feeling relieved, Sandoz told Claude that Dubuche had written to say they shouldn’t wait for him and suggested meeting at the Palais. So, they headed out, and since it was almost eleven, they decided to have lunch at a quiet little crèmerie on Rue St. Honoré, taking their time and feeling lazy despite their eagerness to explore and learn; savoring a bittersweet nostalgia as they lingered and reminisced about their youth.
One o’clock was striking when they crossed the Champs Elysées. It was a lovely day, with a limpid sky, to which the breeze, still somewhat chilly, seemed to impart a brighter azure. Beneath the sun, of the hue of ripe corn, the rows of chestnut trees showed new foliage of a delicate and seemingly freshly varnished green; and the fountains with their leaping sheafs of water, the well-kept lawns, the deep vistas of the pathways, and the broad open spaces, all lent an air of luxurious grandeur to the panorama. A few carriages, very few at that early hour, were ascending the avenue, while a stream of bewildered, bustling people, suggesting a swarm of ants, plunged into the huge archway of the Palais de l’Industrie.
It was one o’clock when they crossed the Champs Elysées. It was a beautiful day, with a clear sky that the still somewhat chilly breeze seemed to make even more vibrant. Under the sunlight, the color of ripe corn, the rows of chestnut trees displayed new leaves in a delicate, almost freshly polished green; and the fountains with their splashing jets of water, the well-maintained lawns, the long pathways, and the expansive open spaces all contributed to a sense of luxurious grandeur in the scene. A few carriages, very few at that early hour, were making their way up the avenue, while a crowd of confused, bustling people, reminiscent of a swarm of ants, poured into the massive archway of the Palais de l’Industrie.
When they were inside, Claude shivered slightly while crossing the gigantic vestibule, which was as cold as a cellar, with a damp pavement which resounded beneath one’s feet, like the flagstones of a church. He glanced right and left at the two monumental stairways, and asked contemptuously: ‘I say, are we going through their dirty Salon?’
When they entered, Claude shivered a bit while walking through the huge foyer, which felt as cold as a basement, with a damp floor that echoed underfoot like the stones of a church. He looked to the right and left at the two massive staircases and asked disdainfully, “So, are we going through their filthy living room?”
‘Oh! no, dash it!’ answered Sandoz. ‘Let’s cut through the garden. The western staircase over there leads to “the Rejected.”’
‘Oh! No way!’ replied Sandoz. ‘Let’s take a shortcut through the garden. The western staircase over there goes to “the Rejected.”’
Then they passed disdainfully between the two little tables of the catalogue vendors. Between the huge red velvet curtains and beyond a shady porch appeared the garden, roofed in with glass. At that time of day it was almost deserted; there were only some people at the buffet under the clock, a throng of people lunching. The crowd was in the galleries on the first floor, and the white statues alone edged the yellow-sanded pathways which with stretches of crude colour intersected the green lawns. There was a whole nation of motionless marble there steeped in the diffuse light falling from the glazed roof on high. Looking southwards, some holland screens barred half of the nave, which showed ambery in the sunlight and was speckled at both ends by the dazzling blue and crimson of stained-glass windows. Just a few visitors, tired already, occupied the brand-new chairs and seats, shiny with fresh paint; while the flights of sparrows, who dwelt above, among the iron girders, swooped down, quite at home, raking up the sand and twittering as they pursued each other.
Then they walked dismissively between the two small tables of the catalog vendors. Between the large red velvet curtains and beyond a shady porch, the garden appeared, covered with glass. At that time of day, it was almost empty; there were only a few people at the buffet under the clock, a crowd having lunch. The bustling crowd was in the galleries on the first floor, and only the white statues lined the yellow-sanded paths that cut through the green lawns. There was a whole nation of motionless marble bathed in the soft light coming from the glass roof above. Looking south, some Holland screens blocked half of the nave, which glowed amber in the sunlight and was dotted at both ends with the brilliant blue and crimson of stained-glass windows. Just a few tired visitors occupied the brand-new chairs and seats, gleaming with fresh paint, while the flocks of sparrows, dwelling above in the iron beams, swooped down, completely at home, scratching up the sand and chirping as they chased each other.
Claude and Sandoz made a show of walking very quickly without giving a glance around them. A stiff classical bronze statue, a Minerva by a member of the Institute, had exasperated them at the very door. But as they hastened past a seemingly endless line of busts, they recognised Bongrand, who, all alone, was going slowly round a colossal, overflowing, recumbent figure, which had been placed in the middle of the path. With his hands behind his back, quite absorbed, he bent his wrinkled face every now and then over the plaster.
Claude and Sandoz pretended to walk quickly without looking around. A stiff bronze statue of Minerva, made by a member of the Institute, had annoyed them right at the entrance. But as they rushed by a seemingly endless line of busts, they spotted Bongrand, who was slowly circling a massive, overflowing, reclining figure that was in the middle of the path. With his hands clasped behind his back, completely focused, he occasionally leaned down to examine the plaster with his wrinkled face.
‘Hallo, it’s you?’ he said, as they held out their hands to him. ‘I was just looking at our friend Mahoudeau’s figure, which they have at least had the intelligence to admit, and to put in a good position.’ Then, breaking off: ‘Have you been upstairs?’ he asked.
‘Hey, is that you?’ he said, as they reached out their hands to him. ‘I was just checking out our friend Mahoudeau’s figure, which at least they had the sense to acknowledge and place in a good spot.’ Then, pausing: ‘Have you been upstairs?’ he asked.
‘No, we have just come in,’ said Claude.
‘No, we just got here,’ said Claude.
Thereupon Bongrand began to talk warmly about the Salon of the Rejected. He, who belonged to the Institute, but who lived apart from his colleagues, made very merry over the affair; the everlasting discontent of painters; the campaign conducted by petty newspapers like ‘The Drummer’; the protestations, the constant complaints that had at last disturbed the Emperor, and the artistic coup d’etat carried out by that silent dreamer, for this Salon of the Rejected was entirely his work. Then the great painter alluded to all the hubbub caused by the flinging of such a paving-stone into that frog’s pond, the official art world.
Thereupon, Bongrand began to speak enthusiastically about the Salon of the Rejected. He, who was part of the Institute but kept his distance from his colleagues, found the whole situation quite amusing; the endless dissatisfaction of artists, the campaign waged by small newspapers like ‘The Drummer,’ the protests, and the constant complaints that finally got under the Emperor's skin, all leading to the artistic coup d’etat orchestrated by that quiet dreamer, as this Salon of the Rejected was completely his creation. Then the great painter mentioned all the commotion stirred up by throwing such a metaphorical stone into that frog's pond of the official art world.
‘No,’ he continued, ‘you can have no idea of the rage and indignation among the members of the hanging committee. And remember I’m distrusted, they generally keep quiet when I’m there. But they are all furious with the realists. It was to them that they systematically closed the doors of the temple; it is on account of them that the Emperor has allowed the public to revise their verdict; and finally it is they, the realists, who triumph. Ah! I hear some nice things said; I wouldn’t give a high price for your skins, youngsters.’
‘No,’ he continued, ‘you have no idea how angry and upset the members of the hanging committee are. And keep in mind that I’m not trusted; they usually stay quiet when I’m around. But they’re all furious with the realists. They systematically shut the doors of the temple on them; it’s because of them that the Emperor has permitted the public to review their verdict; and ultimately, it’s them, the realists, who come out on top. Ah! I hear some interesting things being said; I wouldn’t bet a lot on your safety, kids.’
He laughed his big, joyous laugh, stretching out his arms the while as if to embrace all the youthfulness that he divined rising around him.
He laughed his big, joyful laugh, stretching out his arms as if to embrace all the youthful energy he sensed rising around him.
‘Your disciples are growing,’ said Claude, simply.
‘Your followers are growing,’ said Claude, simply.
But Bongrand, becoming embarrassed, silenced him with a wave of his hand. He himself had not sent anything for exhibition, and the prodigious mass of work amidst which he found himself—those pictures, those statues, all those proofs of creative effort—filled him with regret. It was not jealousy, for there lived not a more upright and better soul; but as a result of self-examination, a gnawing fear of impotence, an unavowed dread haunted him.
But Bongrand, feeling embarrassed, silenced him with a wave of his hand. He hadn’t submitted anything for the exhibition himself, and the overwhelming amount of work surrounding him—those paintings, those sculptures, all those signs of creative effort—filled him with regret. It wasn’t jealousy, as there wasn’t a more honorable and good-hearted person than him; but through introspection, a lingering fear of inadequacy, an unspoken dread troubled him.
‘And at “the Rejected,”’ asked Sandoz; ‘how goes it there?’
‘And at “the Rejected,”’ Sandoz asked; ‘how’s it going there?’
‘Superb; you’ll see.’
‘Awesome; you’ll see.’
Then turning towards Claude, and keeping both the young man’s hands in his own, ‘You, my good fellow, you are a trump. Listen! they say I am clever: well, I’d give ten years of my life to have painted that big hussy of yours.’
Then turning towards Claude and holding both of the young man’s hands in his own, ‘You, my good man, you’re a gem. Listen! They say I’m talented: well, I’d give ten years of my life to have painted that gorgeous woman of yours.’
Praise like that, coming from such lips, moved the young painter to tears. Victory had come at last, then? He failed to find a word of thanks, and abruptly changed the conversation, wishing to hide his emotion.
Praise like that, coming from someone like her, brought the young painter to tears. Victory had finally arrived, then? He couldn't find the right words to say thank you and quickly shifted the conversation, wanting to hide his feelings.
‘That good fellow Mahoudeau!’ he said, ‘why his figure’s capital! He has a deuced fine temperament, hasn’t he?’
“That good guy Mahoudeau!” he said, “his build is amazing! He has a really great temperament, doesn’t he?”
Sandoz and Claude had begun to walk round the plaster figure. Bongrand replied with a smile.
Sandoz and Claude started walking around the plaster figure. Bongrand smiled in response.
‘Yes, yes; there’s too much fulness and massiveness in parts. But just look at the articulations, they are delicate and really pretty. Come, good-bye, I must leave you. I’m going to sit down a while. My legs are bending under me.’
‘Yes, yes; some parts are too heavy and bulky. But just look at the details, they’re delicate and really nice. Anyway, goodbye, I have to go now. I need to sit down for a bit. My legs are giving out on me.’
Claude had raised his head to listen. A tremendous uproar, an incessant crashing that had not struck him at first, careered through the air; it was like the din of a tempest beating against a cliff, the rumbling of an untiring assault, dashing forward from endless space.
Claude had lifted his head to listen. A massive uproar, a nonstop crashing that hadn't registered with him at first, thundered through the air; it was like the noise of a storm battering against a cliff, the rumble of an unyielding attack, rushing forward from infinite space.
‘Hallow, what’s that?’ he muttered.
‘Hello, what’s that?’ he muttered.
‘That,’ said Bongrand, as he walked away, ‘that’s the crowd upstairs in the galleries.’
‘That,’ Bongrand said as he walked away, ‘that’s the crowd up in the galleries.’
And the two young fellows, having crossed the garden, then went up to the Salon of the Rejected.
And the two young guys, after crossing the garden, went up to the Salon of the Rejected.
It had been installed in first-rate style. The officially received pictures were not lodged more sumptuously: lofty hangings of old tapestry at the doors; ‘the line’ set off with green baize; seats of crimson velvet; white linen screens under the large skylights of the roof. And all along the suite of galleries the first impression was the same—there were the same gilt frames, the same bright colours on the canvases. But there was a special kind of cheerfulness, a sparkle of youth which one did not altogether realise at first. The crowd, already compact, increased every minute, for the official Salon was being deserted. People came stung by curiosity, impelled by a desire to judge the judges, and, above all, full of the conviction that they were going to see some very diverting things. It was very hot; a fine dust arose from the flooring; and certainly, towards four o’clock people would stifle there.
It had been set up in top-notch style. The officially displayed images were not framed more lavishly: tall hangings of old tapestries at the doors; ‘the line’ outlined with green felt; seats covered in crimson velvet; white linen screens beneath the large skylights in the roof. And all along the series of galleries, the first impression was the same—there were the same gold frames, the same bright colors on the canvases. But there was a special kind of cheerfulness, a youthful sparkle that you didn’t quite notice at first. The crowd, already dense, grew larger by the minute, as the official Salon was being abandoned. People arrived, driven by curiosity, eager to evaluate the judges, and, above all, convinced that they were about to see some really entertaining things. It was really hot; a fine dust was rising from the floor; and certainly, by around four o’clock, people would be suffocating in there.
‘Hang it!’ said Sandoz, trying to elbow his way, ‘it will be no easy job to move about and find your picture.’
‘Hang it!’ said Sandoz, trying to push his way through, ‘it won’t be easy to move around and find your picture.’
A burst of fraternal feverishness made him eager to get to it. That day he only lived for the work and glory of his old chum.
A rush of brotherly excitement made him eager to dive in. That day, he was completely focused on the work and success of his old friend.
‘Don’t worry!’ exclaimed Claude; ‘we shall get to it all right. My picture won’t fly off.’
‘Don't worry!’ exclaimed Claude; ‘we'll get to it just fine. My picture won't blow away.’
And he affected to be in no hurry, in spite of the almost irresistible desire that he felt to run. He raised his head and looked around him; and soon, amidst the loud voices of the crowd that had bewildered him, he distinguished some restrained laughter, which was almost drowned by the tramp of feet and the hubbub of conversation. Before certain pictures the public stood joking. This made him feel uneasy, for despite all his revolutionary brutality he was as sensitive and as credulous as a woman, and always looked forward to martyrdom, though he was ever grieved and stupefied at being repulsed and railed at.
And he acted like he wasn't in a hurry, even though he really wanted to run. He lifted his head and surveyed the area; soon, amid the loud voices of the crowd that confused him, he picked out some quiet laughter that was nearly drowned out by the sound of footsteps and chatter. In front of certain paintings, people stood joking around. This made him feel uneasy, because despite all his revolutionary toughness, he was as sensitive and gullible as a woman, always anticipating martyrdom, yet constantly hurt and baffled when he was rejected and insulted.
‘They seem gay here,’ he muttered.
'They seem happy here,' he muttered.
‘Well, there’s good reason,’ remarked Sandoz. ‘Just look at those extravagant jades!’
‘Well, there’s a good reason,’ Sandoz said. ‘Just look at those fancy jades!’
At the same moment, while still lingering in the first gallery, Fagerolles ran up against them without seeing them. He started, being no doubt annoyed by the meeting. However, he recovered his composure immediately, and behaved very amiably.
At the same moment, while still hanging out in the first gallery, Fagerolles bumped into them without noticing. He was startled, likely annoyed by the encounter. However, he quickly regained his composure and acted very friendly.
‘Hallo! I was just thinking of you. I have been here for the last hour.’
‘Hey! I was just thinking about you. I’ve been here for the last hour.’
‘Where have they put Claude’s picture?’ asked Sandoz. Fagerolles, who had just remained for twenty minutes in front of that picture studying it and studying the impression which it produced on the public, answered without wincing, ‘I don’t know; I haven’t been able to find it. We’ll look for it together if you like.’
‘Where did they put Claude’s picture?’ asked Sandoz. Fagerolles, who had just spent twenty minutes in front of that picture analyzing it and observing the impression it made on the public, replied without flinching, ‘I don’t know; I haven’t been able to find it. We can search for it together if you want.’
And he joined them. Terrible wag as he was, he no longer affected low-bred manners to the same degree as formerly; he already began to dress well, and although with his mocking nature he was still disposed to snap at everybody as of old, he pursed his lips into the serious expression of a fellow who wants to make his way in the world. With an air of conviction he added: ‘I must say that I now regret not having sent anything this year! I should be here with all the rest of you, and have my share of success. And there are really some astonishing things, my boys! those horses, for instance.’
And he joined them. As terrible as he was, he no longer acted as poorly as he used to; he had started to dress well, and even though his mocking nature still made him want to snap at everyone like before, he tightened his lips into the serious expression of someone trying to succeed in life. With a sense of certainty, he added, “I have to admit that I regret not sending anything this year! I should be here with all of you and enjoy my share of success. And there are some truly amazing things, guys! Like those horses, for example.”
He pointed to a huge canvas in front of them, before which the crowd was gathering and laughing. It was, so people said, the work of an erstwhile veterinary surgeon, and showed a number of life-size horses in a meadow, fantastic horses, blue, violet, and pink, whose astonishing anatomy transpierced their sides.
He pointed to a large canvas in front of them, where a crowd was gathering and laughing. People said it was created by a former veterinary surgeon and depicted several life-size horses in a meadow—fantastical horses in blue, violet, and pink, with their amazing anatomy visible through their sides.
‘I say, don’t you humbug us,’ exclaimed Claude, suspiciously.
“I say, don’t try to fool us,” Claude exclaimed, suspiciously.
But Fagerolles pretended to be enthusiastic. ‘What do you mean? The picture’s full of talent. The fellow who painted it understands horses devilish well. No doubt he paints like a brute. But what’s the odds if he’s original, and contributes a document?’
But Fagerolles acted excited. ‘What do you mean? The painting is full of talent. The guy who painted it really knows horses. No doubt he paints like a beast. But who cares if he’s original and brings something new?’
As he spoke Fagerolles’ delicate girlish face remained perfectly grave, and it was impossible to tell whether he was joking. There was but the slightest yellow twinkle of spitefulness in the depths of his grey eyes. And he finished with a sarcastic allusion, the drift of which was as yet patent to him alone. ‘Ah, well! if you let yourself be influenced by the fools who laugh, you’ll have enough to do by and by.’
As he spoke, Fagerolles' delicate, girl-like face stayed completely serious, making it hard to tell if he was joking. There was just a hint of a spiteful glint in the depths of his gray eyes. He ended with a sarcastic remark, the meaning of which was clear only to him. “Oh, well! If you let the idiots who laugh sway you, you’ll have your hands full eventually.”
The three friends had gone on again, only advancing, however, with infinite difficulty amid that sea of surging shoulders. On entering the second gallery they gave a glance round the walls, but the picture they sought was not there. In lieu thereof they perceived Irma Bécot on the arm of Gagnière, both of them pressed against a hand-rail, he busy examining a small canvas, while she, delighted at being hustled about, raised her pink little mug and laughed at the crowd.
The three friends kept moving forward, but it was incredibly tough to get through the sea of people jostling around. When they entered the second gallery, they quickly scanned the walls, but the painting they were looking for wasn’t there. Instead, they spotted Irma Bécot with Gagnière, both leaning against a handrail. He was focused on examining a small canvas while she, thrilled to be swept along, lifted her cute little face and laughed at the crowd.
‘Hallo!’ said Sandoz, surprised, ‘here she is with Gagnière now!’
‘Hello!’ said Sandoz, surprised, ‘here she is with Gagnière now!’
‘Oh, just a fancy of hers!’ exclaimed Fagerolles quietly. ‘She has a very swell place now. Yes, it was given her by that young idiot of a marquis, whom the papers are always talking about. She’s a girl who’ll make her way; I’ve always said so! But she seems to retain a weakness for painters, and every now and then drops into the Café Baudequin to look up old friends!’
‘Oh, just one of her whims!’ Fagerolles said softly. ‘She has a really nice place now. Yeah, it was given to her by that young idiot of a marquis, who the tabloids are always mentioning. She’s a girl who knows how to get ahead; I’ve always said that! But she still has a soft spot for painters, and every now and then she stops by the Café Baudequin to catch up with old friends!’
Irma had now seen them, and was making gestures from afar. They could but go to her. When Gagnière, with his light hair and little beardless face, turned round, looking more grotesque than over, he did not show the least surprise at finding them there.
Irma had now spotted them and was waving from a distance. They had no choice but to go to her. When Gagnière, with his light hair and boyish face, turned around, looking more ridiculous than ever, he didn't show the slightest surprise at seeing them there.
‘It’s wonderful,’ he muttered.
"It's amazing," he muttered.
‘What’s wonderful?’ asked Fagerolles.
“What's wonderful?” asked Fagerolles.
‘This little masterpiece—and withal honest and naif, and full of conviction.’
‘This little masterpiece—yet it’s honest and naive, and full of conviction.’
He pointed to a tiny canvas before which he had stood absorbed, an absolutely childish picture, such as an urchin of four might have painted; a little cottage at the edge of a little road, with a little tree beside it, the whole out of drawing, and girt round with black lines. Not even a corkscrew imitation of smoke issuing from the roof was forgotten.
He pointed to a small canvas in front of him, where he had been lost in thought. It was a completely childish picture, something a four-year-old might have painted: a tiny cottage at the side of a small road, with a little tree next to it, all poorly drawn and outlined in black. Even a twisted attempt at smoke coming out of the roof was included.
Claude made a nervous gesture, while Fagerolles repeated phlegmatically:
Claude made a nervous gesture, while Fagerolles said calmly:
‘Very delicate, very delicate. But your picture, Gagnière, where is it?’
‘Very delicate, very delicate. But your painting, Gagnière, where is it?’
‘My picture, it is there.’
"My picture, it's right there."
In fact, the picture he had sent happened to be very near the little masterpiece. It was a landscape of a pearly grey, a bit of the Seine banks, painted carefully, pretty in tone, though somewhat heavy, and perfectly ponderated without a sign of any revolutionary splash.
In fact, the picture he had sent was really close to the little masterpiece. It was a landscape in a soft grey, a portion of the Seine banks, painted with care, nice in color, though a bit dull, and perfectly balanced without any signs of a bold stroke.
‘To think that they were idiotic enough to refuse that!’ said Claude, who had approached with an air of interest. But why, I ask you, why?’
‘Can you believe they were stupid enough to refuse that?’ said Claude, who had walked over with a curious expression. But seriously, why?
‘Because it’s realistic,’ said Fagerolles, in so sharp a voice that one could not tell whether he was gibing at the jury or at the picture.
‘Because it’s realistic,’ said Fagerolles, in such a sharp voice that it was hard to tell if he was making fun of the jury or the artwork.
Meanwhile, Irma, of whom no one took any notice, was looking fixedly at Claude with the unconscious smile which the savage loutishness of that big fellow always brought to her lips. To think that he had not even cared to see her again. She found him so much altered since the last time she had seen him, so funny, and not at all prepossessing, with his hair standing on end, and his face wan and sallow, as if he had had a severe fever. Pained that he did not seem to notice her, she wanted to attract his attention, and touched his arm with a familiar gesture.
Meanwhile, Irma, who no one paid any attention to, was gazing intently at Claude with the unconscious smile that the clumsy demeanor of that big guy always brought to her face. It was hard to believe he hadn’t even bothered to see her again. She noticed he looked so different since the last time she’d seen him, kind of goofy and not at all charming, with his hair all messy and his face pale and drawn, as if he had been really sick. Feeling hurt that he didn’t seem to notice her, she wanted to get his attention and lightly touched his arm in a familiar way.
‘I say, isn’t that one of your friends over there, looking for you?’
‘I say, isn’t that one of your friends over there, looking for you?’
It was Dubuche, whom she knew from having seen him on one occasion at the Café Baudequin. He was, with difficulty, elbowing his way through the crowd, and staring vaguely at the sea of heads around him. But all at once, when Claude was trying to attract his notice by dint of gesticulations, the other turned his back to bow very low to a party of three—the father short and fat, with a sanguine face; the mother very thin, of the colour of wax, and devoured by anemia; and the daughter so physically backward at eighteen, that she retained all the lank scragginess of childhood.
It was Dubuche, someone she recognized from seeing him once at the Café Baudequin. He was struggling to push through the crowd, looking vaguely at the sea of heads around him. But suddenly, as Claude was trying to get his attention with gestures, Dubuche turned his back to bow deeply to a group of three—the father was short and chubby with a ruddy face; the mother was very thin, waxy-looking, and badly anemic; and the daughter was so physically undeveloped at eighteen that she still had the lankiness of childhood.
‘All right!’ muttered the painter. ‘There he’s caught now. What ugly acquaintances the brute has! Where can he have fished up such horrors?’
‘All right!’ muttered the painter. ‘Now he’s caught. What disgusting friends this guy has! Where on earth did he find such horrors?’
Gagnière quietly replied that he knew the strangers by sight. M. Margaillan was a great masonry contractor, already a millionaire five or six times over, and was making his fortune out of the great public works of Paris, running up whole boulevards on his own account. No doubt Dubuche had become acquainted with him through one of the architects he worked for.
Gagnière quietly said that he recognized the strangers. M. Margaillan was a leading masonry contractor, already a millionaire multiple times over, and was making his fortune from the major public works in Paris, building entire boulevards on his own. No doubt Dubuche had met him through one of the architects he worked with.
However, Sandoz, compassionating the scragginess of the girl, whom he kept watching, judged her in one sentence.
However, Sandoz, feeling sorry for the girl’s thinness, whom he kept watching, made a quick judgment about her.
‘Ah! the poor little flayed kitten. One feels sorry for her.’
‘Ah! the poor little skinned kitten. One feels sorry for her.’
‘Let them alone!’ exclaimed Claude, ferociously. ‘They have all the crimes of the middle classes stamped on their faces; they reek of scrofula and idiocy. It serves them right. But hallo! our runaway friend is making off with them. What grovellers architects are! Good riddance. He’ll have to look for us when he wants us!’
‘Let them be!’ Claude shouted, fiercely. ‘They have all the flaws of the middle class written all over their faces; they smell of disease and ignorance. They deserve it. But wait! Our escaping friend is taking off with them. What pathetic architects they are! Good riddance. He’ll have to find us when he needs us!’
Dubuche, who had not seen his friends, had just offered his arm to the mother, and was going off, explaining the pictures with gestures typical of exaggerated politeness.
Dubuche, who hadn't seen his friends, had just offered his arm to the mother and was leaving, explaining the pictures with overly polite gestures.
‘Well, let’s proceed then,’ said Fagerolles; and, addressing Gagnière, he asked, ‘Do you know where they have put Claude’s picture?’
‘Well, let’s move on then,’ said Fagerolles; and, speaking to Gagnière, he asked, ‘Do you know where they put Claude’s picture?’
‘I? no, I was looking for it—I am going with you.’
'I? No, I was looking for it—I’m going with you.'
He accompanied them, forgetting Irma Bécot against the ‘line.’ It was she who had wanted to visit the Salon on his arm, and he was so little used to promenading a woman about, that he had constantly lost her on the way, and was each time stupefied to find her again beside him, no longer knowing how or why they were thus together. She ran after them, and took his arm once more in order to follow Claude, who was already passing into another gallery with Fagerolles and Sandoz.
He went along with them, forgetting all about Irma Bécot behind the ‘line.’ She was the one who wanted to visit the Salon with him, and since he wasn't really used to walking around with a woman, he kept losing her along the way. Each time, he was surprised to find her back at his side, not really sure how or why they were together like this. She ran to catch up and took his arm again to follow Claude, who was already moving into another gallery with Fagerolles and Sandoz.
Then the five roamed about in Indian file, with their noses in the air, now separated by a sudden crush, now reunited by another, and ever carried along by the stream. An abomination of Chaîne’s, a ‘Christ pardoning the Woman taken in Adultery,’ made them pause; it was a group of dry figures that looked as if cut out of wood, very bony of build, and seemingly painted with mud. But close by they admired a very fine study of a woman, seen from behind, with her head turned sideways. The whole show was a mixture of the best and the worst, all styles were mingled together, the drivellers of the historical school elbowed the young lunatics of realism, the pure simpletons were lumped together with those who bragged about their originality. A dead Jezabel, that seemed to have rotted in the cellars of the School of Arts, was exhibited near a lady in white, the very curious conception of a future great artist*; then a huge shepherd looking at the sea, a weak production, faced a little painting of some Spaniards playing at rackets, a dash of light of splendid intensity. Nothing execrable was wanting, neither military scenes full of little leaden soldiers, nor wan antiquity, nor the middle ages, smeared, as it were, with bitumen. But from amidst the incoherent ensemble, and especially from the landscapes, all of which were painted in a sincere, correct key, and also from the portraits, most of which were very interesting in respect to workmanship, there came a good fresh scent of youth, bravery and passion. If there were fewer bad pictures in the official Salon, the average there was assuredly more commonplace and mediocre. Here one found the smell of battle, of cheerful battle, given jauntily at daybreak, when the bugle sounds, and when one marches to meet the enemy with the certainty of beating him before sunset.
Then the five walked in a line, noses in the air, sometimes getting jostled apart, then coming back together again, and always being carried along by the crowd. They paused at a terrible piece by Chaîne, a ‘Christ forgiving the Woman caught in Adultery.’ It was a group of stiff figures that looked like they were carved from wood, very bony, and seemingly painted with mud. Nearby, they admired a beautiful study of a woman seen from behind, her head turned to the side. The entire exhibition was a mix of the best and the worst; all styles were blended together, with the tedious historical painters jostling against the wild realists, the naive ones mixed in with those who boasted of their originality. A rotting Jezebel, which seemed to have decayed in the cellars of the School of Arts, was displayed next to a lady in white, a very intriguing piece by a future great artist*; then a massive shepherd gazing at the sea, a weak artwork, faced off with a small painting of some Spaniards playing rackets, a splash of light with stunning intensity. There was no shortage of horrible pieces, including military scenes full of little lead soldiers, pale antiquity, and the Middle Ages, smeared as if with tar. But amid the chaotic collection, particularly in the landscapes, which were all painted with a sincere and accurate touch, and in the portraits, most of which were quite captivating in terms of craftsmanship, there was a refreshing scent of youth, courage, and passion. While there were fewer bad paintings in the official Salon, their average quality was certainly more bland and mediocre. Here, one could sense the aroma of battle, a cheerful battle, joyfully greeted at dawn when the bugle sounds, and when one marches to confront the enemy with the confidence of defeating them before sunset.
* Edouard Manet.—ED.
Edouard Manet. — ED.
Claude, whose spirits had revived amidst that martial odour, grew animated and pugnacious as he listened to the laughter of the public. He looked as defiant, indeed, as if he had heard bullets whizzing past him. Sufficiently discreet at the entrance of the galleries, the laughter became more boisterous, more unrestrained, as they advanced. In the third room the women ceased concealing their smiles behind their handkerchiefs, while the men openly held their sides the better to ease themselves. It was the contagious hilarity of people who had come to amuse themselves, and who were growing gradually excited, bursting out at a mere trifle, diverted as much by the good things as by the bad. Folks laughed less before Chaîne’s Christ than before the back view of the nude woman, who seemed to them very comical indeed. The ‘Lady in White’ also stupefied people and drew them together; folks nudged each other and went into hysterics almost; there was always a grinning group in front of it. Each canvas thus had its particular kind of success; people hailed each other from a distance to point out something funny, and witticisms flew from mouth to mouth; to such a degree indeed that, as Claude entered the fourth gallery, lashed into fury by the tempest of laughter that was raging there as well, he all but slapped the face of an old lady whose chuckles exasperated him.
Claude, feeling uplifted by the energetic atmosphere, became animated and combative as he listened to the crowd's laughter. He looked as defiant as if he had heard bullets whizzing by. Initially reserved at the entrance of the galleries, laughter grew louder and more uninhibited as they moved deeper inside. By the third room, women stopped hiding their smiles behind their handkerchiefs, while men openly held their sides to relieve themselves. It was the contagious joy of people who had come to have fun and were gradually getting more excited, erupting with laughter over the smallest things, entertained by both the good and the bad. People laughed less at Chaîne’s Christ than at the back view of the nude woman, which they found very funny. The ‘Lady in White’ also left people speechless and drew them in; everyone was nudging each other and nearly in hysterics, with a grinning crowd always in front of it. Each painting had its own kind of success; people called out to each other from afar to point out something amusing, and jokes spread quickly from person to person. So much so that, as Claude entered the fourth gallery, driven into a rage by the storm of laughter there, he almost slapped the face of an old lady whose chuckles irritated him.
‘What idiots!’ he said, turning towards his friends. ‘One feels inclined to throw a lot of masterpieces at their heads.’
‘What idiots!’ he said, turning to his friends. ‘It makes you want to throw a bunch of masterpieces at their heads.’
Sandoz had become fiery also, and Fagerolles continued praising the most dreadful daubs, which only tended to increase the laughter, while Gagnière, at sea amid the hubbub, dragged on the delighted Irma, whose skirts somehow wound round the legs of all the men.
Sandoz had also become passionate, and Fagerolles kept praising the most awful paintings, which only made the laughter grow louder, while Gagnière, overwhelmed by the noise, pulled along the amused Irma, whose skirts somehow got tangled around the legs of all the men.
But of a sudden Jory stood before them. His fair handsome face absolutely beamed. He cut his way through the crowd, gesticulated, and exulted, as if over a personal victory. And the moment he perceived Claude, he shouted:
But suddenly, Jory stood before them. His attractive face was absolutely beaming. He pushed his way through the crowd, gesturing and celebrating as if he had just won a personal victory. And the moment he saw Claude, he shouted:
‘Here you are at last! I have been looking for you this hour. A success, old fellow, oh! a success—’
‘Here you are at last! I’ve been looking for you for an hour. A success, my friend, oh! a success—’
‘What success?’
"What success?"
‘Why, the success of your picture. Come, I must show it you. You’ll see, it’s stunning.’
‘Check out your picture's success! Come on, I have to show it to you. You'll see, it's amazing.’
Claude grew pale. A great joy choked him, while he pretended to receive the news with composure. Bongrand’s words came back to him. He began to believe that he possessed genius.
Claude turned pale. A wave of joy overwhelmed him, while he tried to respond to the news calmly. Bongrand’s words echoed in his mind. He started to believe that he had genius.
‘Hallo, how are you?’ continued Jory, shaking hands with the others.
‘Hey, how's it going?’ continued Jory, shaking hands with the others.
And, without more ado, he, Fagerolles and Gagnière surrounded Irma, who smiled on them in a good-natured way.
And, without further delay, he, Fagerolles, and Gagnière gathered around Irma, who smiled at them kindly.
‘Perhaps you’ll tell us where the picture is,’ said Sandoz, impatiently. ‘Take us to it.’
‘Maybe you can tell us where the picture is,’ Sandoz said, impatiently. ‘Take us to it.’
Jory assumed the lead, followed by the band. They had to fight their way into the last gallery. But Claude, who brought up the rear, still heard the laughter that rose on the air, a swelling clamour, the roll of a tide near its full. And as he finally entered the room, he beheld a vast, swarming, closely packed crowd pressing eagerly in front of his picture. All the laughter arose, spread, and ended there. And it was his picture that was being laughed at.
Jory took the lead, followed by the rest of the group. They had to push their way into the last gallery. But Claude, who was bringing up the rear, could still hear the laughter that filled the air, a growing noise, like a tide just before it reaches its peak. When he finally walked into the room, he saw a huge, buzzing, tightly packed crowd eagerly gathered in front of his painting. All the laughter came from, spread, and ended there. And it was his painting that they were laughing at.
‘Eh!’ repeated Jory, triumphantly, ‘there’s a success for you.’
‘Eh!’ repeated Jory, triumphantly, ‘there's a win for you.’
Gagnière, intimidated, as ashamed as if he himself had been slapped, muttered: ‘Too much of a success—I should prefer something different.’
Gagnière, feeling intimidated and just as embarrassed as if he had been slapped, muttered: ‘This is too successful—I’d rather have something else.’
‘What a fool you are,’ replied Jory, in a burst of exalted conviction. ‘That’s what I call success. Does it matter a curse if they laugh? We have made our mark; to-morrow every paper will talk about us.’
‘What a fool you are,’ Jory replied, filled with excitement. ‘That’s what I call success. Does it even matter if they laugh? We’ve made our mark; tomorrow every paper will mention us.’
‘The idiots,’ was all that Sandoz could gasp, choking with grief.
‘The idiots,’ was all that Sandoz could manage to say, struggling with grief.
Fagerolles, disinterested and dignified like a family friend following a funeral procession, said nothing. Irma alone remained gay, thinking it all very funny. And, with a caressing gesture, she leant against the shoulder of the derided painter, and whispered softly in his ear: ‘Don’t fret, my boy. It’s all humbug, be merry all the same.’
Fagerolles, aloof and dignified like a family friend after a funeral, said nothing. Irma alone was cheerful, finding it all quite amusing. With a gentle touch, she leaned against the shoulder of the mocked painter and quietly whispered in his ear, "Don't worry, my friend. It's all nonsense, so just enjoy yourself."
But Claude did not stir. An icy chill had come over him. For a moment his heart had almost ceased to beat, so cruel had been the disappointment And with his eyes enlarged, attracted and fixed by a resistless force, he looked at his picture. He was surprised, and scarcely recognised it; it certainly was not such as it had seemed to be in his studio. It had grown yellow beneath the livid light of the linen screens; it seemed, moreover, to have become smaller; coarser and more laboured also; and whether it was the effect of the light in which it now hung, or the contrast of the works beside it, at all events he now at the first glance saw all its defects, after having remained blind to them, as it were, for months. With a few strokes of the brush he, in thought, altered the whole of it, deepened the distances, set a badly drawn limb right, and modified a tone. Decidedly, the gentleman in the velveteen jacket was worth nothing at all, he was altogether pasty and badly seated; the only really good bit of work about him was his hand. In the background the two little wrestlers—the fair and the dark one—had remained too sketchy, and lacked substance; they were amusing only to an artist’s eye. But he was pleased with the trees, with the sunny glade; and the nude woman—the woman lying on the grass appeared to him superior to his own powers, as if some one else had painted her, and as if he had never yet beheld her in such resplendency of life.
But Claude didn’t move. A cold chill swept over him. For a moment, his heart nearly stopped beating, the disappointment was so intense. With his eyes wide open, drawn in and locked onto his painting by an irresistible force, he stared at it. He was shocked and hardly recognized it; it definitely didn’t look the same as it had in his studio. It had turned yellow under the harsh light of the linen screens; it also seemed to have become smaller, coarser, and more forced; whether it was the lighting it was in now or the comparison to the works next to it, he could now see all its flaws at first glance, after having been blind to them for months. With a few brush strokes in his mind, he imagined changing the whole thing, deepening the backgrounds, fixing a poorly drawn limb, and adjusting a tone. Clearly, the man in the velveteen jacket wasn’t worth anything; he looked completely ghostly and poorly positioned; the only really good part about him was his hand. In the background, the two little wrestlers—the fair one and the dark one—still looked too sketchy and lacked depth; they were only interesting to an artist's eye. But he liked the trees, the sunny clearing; and the nude woman—the woman lying on the grass—seemed to him to be beyond his abilities, as if someone else had painted her, and it felt like he had never seen her in such vibrant life before.
He turned to Sandoz, and said simply:
He turned to Sandoz and said straightforwardly:
‘They do right to laugh; it’s incomplete. Never mind, the woman is all right! Bongrand was not hoaxing me.’
‘They’re right to laugh; it’s incomplete. Whatever, the woman is fine! Bongrand wasn’t fooling me.’
His friend wished to take him away, but he became obstinate, and drew nearer instead. Now that he had judged his work, he listened and looked at the crowd. The explosion continued—culminated in an ascending scale of mad laughter. No sooner had visitors crossed the threshold than he saw their jaws part, their eyes grow small, their entire faces expand; and he heard the tempestuous puffing of the fat men, the rusty grating jeers of the lean ones, amidst all the shrill, flute-like laughter of the women. Opposite him, against the hand-rails, some young fellows went into contortions, as if somebody had been tickling them. One lady had flung herself on a seat, stifling and trying to regain breath with her handkerchief over her mouth. Rumours of this picture, which was so very, very funny, must have been spreading, for there was a rush from the four corners of the Salon, bands of people arrived, jostling each other, and all eagerness to share the fun. ‘Where is it?’ ‘Over there.’ ‘Oh, what a joke!’ And the witticisms fell thicker than elsewhere. It was especially the subject that caused merriment; people failed to understand it, thought it insane, comical enough to make one ill with laughter. ‘You see the lady feels too hot, while the gentleman has put on his velveteen jacket for fear of catching cold.’ ‘Not at all; she is already blue; the gentleman has pulled her out of a pond, and he is resting at a distance, holding his nose.’ ‘I tell you it’s a young ladies’ school out for a ramble. Look at the two playing at leap-frog.’ ‘Hallo! washing day; the flesh is blue; the trees are blue; he’s dipped his picture in the blueing tub!’
His friend wanted to pull him away, but he became stubborn and moved closer instead. Now that he had evaluated his work, he listened and observed the crowd. The noise continued, building into a crescendo of wild laughter. As soon as visitors crossed the threshold, he noticed their jaws drop, their eyes squinting, and their faces lighting up; he heard the heavy breathing of the heavyset men and the harsh laughter from the lean ones, amidst the high-pitched laughter of the women. In front of him, leaning against the handrails, some young guys were squirming around as if someone had been tickling them. One woman threw herself onto a seat, struggling to catch her breath with her handkerchief over her mouth. News of this incredibly funny scene must have spread, as people rushed in from all directions of the Salon, pushing each other and eager to join in on the fun. “Where is it?” “Over there.” “Oh, that’s hilarious!” And the jokes flowed even more freely than before. It was particularly the subject that sparked laughter; people couldn't quite grasp it, finding it absurd and amusing enough to make them double over with laughter. “You see, the lady looks too hot while the gentleman has put on his velvet jacket to avoid getting cold.” “Not at all; she’s already freezing; the gentleman pulled her out of a pond, and he’s keeping his distance, holding his nose.” “I’m telling you it’s a girls' school out for a stroll. Look at the two playing leapfrog.” “Hey! It’s laundry day; the skin is blue; the trees are blue; he’s dipped his painting in the blueing tub!”
Those who did not laugh flew into a rage: that bluish tinge, that novel rendering of light seemed an insult to them. Some old gentlemen shook their sticks. Was art to be outraged like this? One grave individual went away very wroth, saying to his wife that he did not like practical jokes. But another, a punctilious little man, having looked in the catalogue for the title of the work, in order to tell his daughter, read out the words, ‘In the Open Air,’ whereupon there came a formidable renewal of the clamour, hisses and shouts, and what not else besides. The title sped about; it was repeated, commented on. ‘In the Open Air! ah, yes, the open air, the nude woman in the air, everything in the air, tra la la laire.’ The affair was becoming a scandal. The crowd still increased. People’s faces grew red with congestion in the growing heat. Each had the stupidly gaping mouth of the ignoramus who judges painting, and between them they indulged in all the asinine ideas, all the preposterous reflections, all the stupid spiteful jeers that the sight of an original work can possibly elicit from bourgeois imbecility.
Those who didn't laugh got really angry: that bluish tint, that unique way of showing light felt like an insult to them. Some older men shook their canes. Was art supposed to be disrespected like this? One serious man stormed off, telling his wife that he wasn't a fan of practical jokes. But another, a meticulous little guy, checked the catalog for the title of the piece so he could tell his daughter, and read out the words, ‘In the Open Air.’ This triggered a huge wave of noise, hissing and shouting, and all sorts of chaos. The title went viral; they repeated it, commented on it. ‘In the Open Air! Oh, yes, the open air, the naked woman in the air, everything in the air, tra la la laire.’ The whole situation was turning into a scandal. The crowd kept growing. People’s faces turned red with heat. Each had that dumb, gaping expression of someone clueless about painting, and among them, they shared all the ridiculous opinions, all the absurd thoughts, all the stupid spiteful jabs that the sight of an original piece could possibly provoke from clueless middle-class minds.
At that moment, as a last blow, Claude beheld Dubuche reappear, dragging the Margaillans along. As soon as he came in front of the picture, the architect, ill at ease, overtaken by cowardly shame, wished to quicken his pace and lead his party further on, pretending that he saw neither the canvas nor his friends. But the contractor had already drawn himself up on his short, squat legs, and was staring at the picture, and asking aloud in his thick hoarse voice:
At that moment, as a final blow, Claude saw Dubuche come back, dragging the Margaillans with him. As he reached the painting, the architect, feeling uncomfortable and hit with a wave of shame, wanted to hurry past and move his group along, pretending he didn’t see either the artwork or his friends. But the contractor had already planted his short, stocky legs and was staring at the painting, asking out loud in his gruff, raspy voice:
‘I say, who’s the blockhead that painted this?’
‘I say, who’s the idiot that painted this?’
That good-natured bluster, that cry of a millionaire parvenu resuming the average opinion of the assembly, increased the general merriment; and he, flattered by his success, and tickled by the strange style of the painting, started laughing in his turn, so sonorously that he could be heard above all the others. This was the hallelujah, a final outburst of the great organ of opinion.
That boisterous enthusiasm, that shout from a newly wealthy millionaire echoing the common consensus of the group, added to the overall amusement; and he, pleased by his popularity and amused by the peculiar style of the painting, began to laugh so loudly that he outshone everyone else. This was the hallelujah, a final explosion from the massive organ of public opinion.
‘Take my daughter away,’ whispered pale-faced Madame Margaillan in Dubuche’s ear.
‘Take my daughter away,’ whispered pale-faced Madame Margaillan in Dubuche’s ear.
He sprang forward and freed Régine, who had lowered her eyelids, from the crowd; displaying in doing so as much muscular energy as if it had been a question of saving the poor creature from imminent death. Then having taken leave of the Margaillans at the door, with a deal of handshaking and bows, he came towards his friends, and said straightway to Sandoz, Fagerolles, and Gagnière:
He rushed forward and pulled Régine, who had closed her eyes, out of the crowd; showing as much physical strength as if he were saving her from certain death. After saying goodbye to the Margaillans at the door, with plenty of handshakes and bows, he approached his friends and immediately said to Sandoz, Fagerolles, and Gagnière:
‘What would you have? It isn’t my fault—I warned him that the public would not understand him. It’s improper; yes, you may say what you like, it’s improper.’
‘What do you want? It’s not my fault—I told him that the public wouldn’t get him. It’s inappropriate; yes, you can say whatever you want, it’s inappropriate.’
‘They hissed Delacroix,’ broke in Sandoz, white with rage, and clenching his fists. ‘They hissed Courbet. Oh, the race of enemies! Oh, the born idiots!’
‘They booed Delacroix,’ Sandoz interrupted, his face white with rage as he clenched his fists. ‘They booed Courbet. Oh, the enemies! Oh, the born fools!’
Gagnière, who now shared this artistic vindictiveness, grew angry at the recollection of his Sunday battles at the Pasdeloup Concerts in favour of real music.
Gagnière, who now shared this artistic resentment, felt frustrated when he remembered his Sunday fights at the Pasdeloup Concerts advocating for genuine music.
‘And they hiss Wagner too; they are the same crew. I recognise them. You see that fat fellow over there—’
‘And they boo Wagner too; they’re the same group. I know them. You see that chubby guy over there—’
Jory had to hold him back. The journalist for his part would rather have urged on the crowd. He kept on repeating that it was famous, that there was a hundred thousand francs’ worth of advertisements in it. And Irma, left to her own devices once more, went up to two of her friends, young Bourse men who were among the most persistent scoffers, but whom she began to indoctrinate, forcing them, as it were, into admiration, by rapping them on the knuckles.
Jory had to hold him back. The journalist, on the other hand, would have preferred to egg the crowd on. He kept saying that it was famous, that there were a hundred thousand francs’ worth of ads in it. Meanwhile, Irma, once again left to her own devices, approached two of her friends, young stockbrokers who were among the most vocal skeptics, but whom she began to persuade, almost forcing them into admiration by tapping them on the knuckles.
Fagerolles, however, had not opened his lips. He kept on examining the picture, and glancing at the crowd. With his Parisian instinct and the elastic conscience of a skilful fellow, he at once fathomed the misunderstanding. He was already vaguely conscious of what was wanted for that style of painting to make the conquest of everybody—a little trickery perhaps, some attenuations, a different choice of subject, a milder method of execution. In the main, the influence that Claude had always had over him persisted in making itself felt; he remained imbued with it; it had set its stamp upon him for ever. Only he considered Claude to be an arch-idiot to have exhibited such a thing as that. Wasn’t it stupid to believe in the intelligence of the public? What was the meaning of that nude woman beside that gentleman who was fully dressed? And what did those two little wrestlers in the background mean? Yet the picture showed many of the qualities of a master. There wasn’t another bit of painting like it in the Salon! And he felt a great contempt for that artist, so admirably endowed, who through lack of tact made all Paris roar as if he had been the worst of daubers.
Fagerolles, however, hadn’t said a word. He continued studying the painting and glancing at the crowd. With his Parisian instincts and the flexible conscience of a clever person, he quickly understood the misunderstanding. He was already somewhat aware of what was needed for that style of painting to win everyone over—a bit of trickery maybe, some adjustments, a different subject choice, a gentler execution. Overall, the influence Claude had always had on him still lingered; he remained deeply influenced by it; it had left its mark on him forever. He just thought Claude was foolish for showing something like that. Wasn’t it ridiculous to trust the intelligence of the public? What was the point of that nude woman next to the fully dressed man? And what did those two little wrestlers in the background signify? Yet the painting had many qualities of a master. There wasn’t another piece of art like it in the Salon! And he felt a deep contempt for that artist, so wonderfully talented, who, due to his lack of tact, made all of Paris laugh as if he were one of the worst painters.
This contempt became so strong that he was unable to hide it. In a moment of irresistible frankness he exclaimed:
This disdain grew so intense that he couldn't conceal it. In a moment of overwhelming honesty, he exclaimed:
‘Look here, my dear fellow, it’s your own fault, you are too stupid.’
‘Look, my friend, it’s your own fault; you’re just not very bright.’
Claude, turning his eyes from the crowd, looked at him in silence. He had not winced, he had only turned pale amidst the laughter, and if his lips quivered it was merely with a slight nervous twitching; nobody knew him, it was his work alone that was being buffeted. Then for a moment he glanced again at his picture, and slowly inspected the other canvases in the gallery. And amidst the collapse of his illusions, the bitter agony of his pride, a breath of courage, a whiff of health and youth came to him from all that gaily-brave painting which rushed with such headlong passion to beat down classical conventionality. He was consoled and inspirited by it all; he felt no remorse nor contrition, but, on the contrary, was impelled to fight the popular taste still more. No doubt there was some clumsiness and some puerility of effort in his work, but on the other hand what a pretty general tone, what a play of light he had thrown into it, a silvery grey light, fine and diffuse, brightened by all the dancing sunbeams of the open air. It was as if a window had been suddenly opened amidst all the old bituminous cookery of art, amidst all the stewing sauces of tradition, and the sun came in and the walls smiled under that invasion of springtide. The light note of his picture, the bluish tinge that people had been railing at, flashed out among the other paintings also. Was this not the expected dawn, a new aurora rising on art? He perceived a critic who stopped without laughing, some celebrated painters who looked surprised and grave, while Papa Malgras, very dirty, went from picture to picture with the pout of a wary connoisseur, and finally stopped short in front of his canvas, motionless, absorbed. Then Claude turned round to Fagerolles, and surprised him by this tardy reply:
Claude, turning his gaze away from the crowd, looked at him silently. He didn’t flinch; he just paled among the laughter, and if his lips trembled, it was only a slight nervous twitch; nobody knew him; it was only his work that was under attack. Then he glanced at his painting again and slowly examined the other canvases in the gallery. Amid the collapse of his dreams, the bitter pain of his pride, a breath of courage and a hint of youth and health came to him from all that boldly vibrant art, rushing with such intense passion to break away from traditional norms. He felt consoled and uplifted by it all; he had no remorse or regret, but rather felt driven to challenge popular taste even more. No doubt there was some awkwardness and childishness in his work, but on the flip side, the overall tone was lovely, with a play of light that he had infused into it—a silvery grey light, fine and spread out, brightened by all the dancing sunbeams of the outdoors. It was like a window had suddenly opened among all the old, heavy styles of art, amidst all the simmering traditions, and the sun poured in, making the walls come alive with that touch of spring. The lighter aspect of his painting, the bluish tinge that people had criticized, sparkled among the other artworks as well. Was this not the dawn everyone had been waiting for, a new beginning for art? He noticed a critic who remained silent, some famous painters looking surprised and serious, while Papa Malgras, quite dirty, moved from painting to painting with the cautious look of a connoisseur, eventually stopping in front of his canvas, motionless and absorbed. Then Claude turned to Fagerolles and surprised him with this delayed response:
‘A fellow can only be an idiot according to his own lights, my dear chap, and it looks as if I am going to remain one. So much the better for you if you are clever!’
‘A guy can only be an idiot based on his own perspective, my friend, and it seems like I’m going to stay one. That’s great for you if you’re smart!’
Fagerolles at once patted him on the shoulder, like a chum who had only been in fun, and Claude allowed Sandoz to take his arm. They led him off at last. The whole band left the Salon of the Rejected, deciding that they would pass on their way through the gallery of architecture; for a design for a museum by Dubuche had been accepted, and for some few minutes he had been fidgeting and begging them with so humble a look, that it seemed difficult indeed to deny him this satisfaction.
Fagerolles immediately patted him on the shoulder, like a buddy who was just joking around, and Claude let Sandoz take his arm. They finally took him away. The whole group left the Salon of the Rejected, deciding to head through the architecture gallery; a design for a museum by Dubuche had been accepted, and for a little while he had been restless and pleading with such a humble expression that it really felt hard to deny him this satisfaction.
‘Ah!’ said Jory, jocularly, on entering the gallery, ‘what an ice-well! One can breathe here.’
‘Ah!’ Jory said jokingly as he entered the gallery, ‘what a breath of fresh air! It feels great in here.’
They all took off their hats and wiped their foreheads, with a feeling of relief, as if they had reached some big shady trees after a long march in full sunlight. The gallery was empty. From the roof, shaded by a white linen screen, there fell a soft, even, rather sad light, which was reflected like quiescent water by the well-waxed, mirror-like floor. On the four walls, of a faded red, hung the plans and designs in large and small chases, edged with pale blue borders. Alone—absolutely alone—amidst this desert stood a very hirsute gentleman, who was lost in the contemplation of the plan of a charity home. Three ladies who appeared became frightened and fled across the gallery with hasty steps.
They all took off their hats and wiped their foreheads, feeling relieved, as if they had finally reached some big shady trees after a long walk in the blazing sun. The gallery was empty. A soft, even, somewhat melancholic light filtered in from the roof, shaded by a white linen screen, and was reflected like still water on the well-waxed, mirror-like floor. On the four walls, painted a faded red, hung the plans and designs in large and small frames, bordered with pale blue. Alone—absolutely alone—amid this emptiness stood a very hairy man, lost in thought as he studied the plan of a charity home. Three women who appeared were startled and quickly rushed across the gallery.
Dubuche was already showing and explaining his work to his comrades. It was only a drawing of a modest little museum gallery, which he had sent in with ambitious haste, contrary to custom and against the wishes of his master, who, nevertheless, had used his influence to have it accepted, thinking himself pledged to do so.
Dubuche was already showing and explaining his work to his colleagues. It was just a drawing of a small museum gallery, which he had submitted in a rush, going against the usual practice and the wishes of his mentor. However, his mentor had still used his influence to get it accepted, feeling obligated to do so.
‘Is your museum intended for the accommodation of the paintings of the “open air” school?’ asked Fagerolles, very gravely.
‘Is your museum meant for displaying the paintings of the “open air” school?’ asked Fagerolles, very seriously.
Gagnière pretended to admire the plan, nodding his head, but thinking of something else; while Claude and Sandoz examined it with sincere interest.
Gagnière pretended to admire the plan, nodding his head, but was thinking about something else, while Claude and Sandoz looked at it with genuine interest.
‘Not bad, old boy,’ said the former. ‘The ornamentation is still bastardly traditional; but never mind; it will do.’
‘Not bad, my friend,’ said the former. ‘The decoration is still annoyingly traditional; but never mind; it will work.’
Jory, becoming impatient at last, cut him short.
Jory, finally losing patience, interrupted him.
‘Come along, let’s go, eh? I’m catching my death of cold here.’
‘Come on, let’s go, okay? I’m freezing to death out here.’
The band resumed its march. The worst was that to make a short cut they had to go right through the official Salon, and they resigned themselves to doing so, notwithstanding the oath they had taken not to set foot in it, as a matter of protest. Cutting their way through the crowd, keeping rigidly erect, they followed the suite of galleries, casting indignant glances to right and left. There was none of the gay scandal of their Salon, full of fresh tones and an exaggeration of sunlight, here. One after the other came gilt frames full of shadows; black pretentious things, nude figures showing yellowish in a cellar-like light, the frippery of so-called classical art, historical, genre and landscape painting, all showing the same conventional black grease. The works reeked of uniform mediocrity, they were characterised by a muddy dinginess of tone, despite their primness—the primness of impoverished, degenerate blood. And the friends quickened their steps: they ran to escape from that reign of bitumen, condemning everything in one lump with their superb sectarian injustice, repeating that there was nothing in the place worth looking at—nothing, nothing at all!
The band continued their march. Unfortunately, to take a shortcut, they had to go straight through the official Salon, and they accepted this, despite their promise not to step inside it as a form of protest. As they maneuvered through the crowd, standing tall, they followed the series of galleries, casting angry looks to the right and left. Gone was the lively scandal of their own Salon, vibrant with fresh colors and an exaggerated sunlight. Instead, there were only gilt frames filled with shadows; dark, pretentious things, with nude figures appearing yellowish in a dim light, the trappings of so-called classical art, historical, genre, and landscape paintings, all coated in the same conventional black grease. The works exuded a stench of uniform mediocrity, marked by a muddy dullness, despite their neatness—the neatness of impoverished, degenerate blood. The friends picked up their pace: they rushed to escape that reign of tar, condemning everything in one broad stroke with their impressive sectarian bias, declaring that there was nothing in the place worth seeing—nothing, nothing at all!
At last they emerged from the galleries, and were going down into the garden when they met Mahoudeau and Chaîne. The former threw himself into Claude’s arms.
At last, they came out of the galleries and were heading down to the garden when they ran into Mahoudeau and Chaîne. The former jumped into Claude’s arms.
‘Ah, my dear fellow, your picture; what artistic temperament it shows!’
‘Oh, my dear friend, your painting; what an artistic flair it shows!’
The painter at once began to praise the ‘Vintaging Girl.’
The painter immediately started to praise the ‘Vintaging Girl.’
‘And you, I say, you have thrown a nice big lump at their heads!’
‘And you, I say, you’ve hit them right in the head with a big chunk!’
But the sight of Chaîne, to whom no one spoke about the ‘Woman taken in Adultery,’ and who went silently wandering around, awakened Claude’s compassion. He thought there was something very sad about that execrable painting, and the wasted life of that peasant who was a victim of middle-class admiration. He always gave him the delight of a little praise; so now he shook his hand cordially, exclaiming:
But seeing Chaîne, who no one mentioned the ‘Woman taken in Adultery’ to, and who was wandering around silently, stirred Claude’s sympathy. He found the whole awful painting and the wasted life of that peasant—who was a casualty of middle-class admiration—quite tragic. He always offered him a bit of praise, so now he shook his hand warmly, exclaiming:
‘Your machine’s very good too. Ah, my fine fellow, draughtsmanship has no terrors for you!’
‘Your machine's really impressive too. Ah, my good friend, drawing has nothing to scare you!’
‘No, indeed,’ declared Chaîne, who had grown purple with vanity under his black bushy beard.
‘No, definitely not,’ declared Chaîne, who had turned purple with pride under his thick black beard.
He and Mahoudeau joined the band, and the latter asked the others whether they had seen Chambouvard’s ‘Sower.’ It was marvellous; the only piece of statuary worth looking at in the Salon. Thereupon they all followed him into the garden, which the crowd was now invading.
He and Mahoudeau joined the group, and Mahoudeau asked the others if they had seen Chambouvard’s ‘Sower.’ It was amazing; the only statue worth seeing in the Salon. So they all followed him into the garden, which was now getting crowded.
‘There,’ said Mahoudeau, stopping in the middle of the central path: ‘Chambouvard is standing just in front of his “Sower.”’
‘There,’ said Mahoudeau, stopping in the middle of the central path, ‘Chambouvard is standing right in front of his "Sower."’
In fact, a portly man stood there, solidly planted on his fat legs, and admiring his handiwork. With his head sunk between his shoulders, he had the heavy, handsome features of a Hindu idol. He was said to be the son of a veterinary surgeon of the neighbourhood of Amiens. At forty-five he had already produced twenty masterpieces: statues all simplicity and life, flesh modern and palpitating, kneaded by a workman of genius, without any pretension to refinement; and all this was chance production, for he furnished work as a field bears harvest, good one day, bad the next, in absolute ignorance of what he created. He carried the lack of critical acumen to such a degree that he made no distinction between the most glorious offspring of his hands and the detestably grotesque figures which now and then he chanced to put together. Never troubled by nervous feverishness, never doubting, always solid and convinced, he had the pride of a god.
In fact, a hefty man stood there, firmly planted on his thick legs, admiring his work. With his head hunched between his shoulders, he had the heavy, attractive features of a Hindu statue. People said he was the son of a local veterinarian from the Amiens area. At forty-five, he had already created twenty masterpieces: statues full of simplicity and life, with modern, vibrant flesh, crafted by a talented artisan, without any pretensions of sophistication; and all of this came about by chance, as he produced work like a field yields crops, good one day, bad the next, completely unaware of what he was making. He was so lacking in critical insight that he couldn’t tell the difference between the most glorious creations of his own hands and the horrendously grotesque figures he occasionally ended up creating. Never plagued by nervous anxiety, never uncertain, always solid and confident, he had the pride of a god.
‘Wonderful, the “Sower”!’ whispered Claude. ‘What a figure! and what an attitude!’
‘Amazing, the “Sower”!’ whispered Claude. ‘What a figure! And what a pose!’
Fagerolles, who had not looked at the statue, was highly amused by the great man, and the string of young, open-mouthed disciples whom as usual he dragged at his tail.
Fagerolles, who hadn’t looked at the statue, was really entertained by the great man and the group of young, wide-eyed followers that he always seemed to bring along with him.
‘Just look at them, one would think they are taking the sacrament, ‘pon my word—and he himself, eh? What a fine brutish face he has!’
‘Just look at them, you’d think they were taking the sacrament, I swear—and he himself, huh? What a strong, rough face he has!’
Isolated, and quite at his ease, amidst the general curiosity, Chambouvard stood there wondering, with the stupefied air of a man who is surprised at having produced such a masterpiece. He seemed to behold it for the first time, and was unable to get over his astonishment. Then an expression of delight gradually stole over his broad face, he nodded his head, and burst into soft, irresistible laughter, repeating a dozen times, ‘It’s comical, it’s really comical!’
Isolated and feeling relaxed despite the curiosity around him, Chambouvard stood there in wonder, looking like someone who couldn’t believe he had created such a masterpiece. It felt like he was seeing it for the first time, and he couldn’t shake his amazement. Gradually, a look of joy spread across his broad face; he nodded his head and broke into soft, infectious laughter, repeating a dozen times, “It’s funny, it’s really funny!”
His train of followers went into raptures, while he himself could find nothing more forcible to express how much he worshipped himself. All at once there was a slight stir. Bongrand, who had been walking about with his hands behind his back, glancing vaguely around him, had just stumbled on Chambouvard, and the public, drawing back, whispered, and watched the two celebrated artists shaking hands; the one short and of a sanguine temperament, the other tall and restless. Some expressions of good-fellowship were overheard. ‘Always fresh marvels.’ ‘Of course! And you, nothing this year?’ ‘No, nothing; I am resting, seeking—’ ‘Come, you joker! There’s no need to seek, the thing comes by itself.’ ‘Good-bye.’ ‘Good-bye.’ And Chambouvard, followed by his court, was already moving slowly away among the crowd, with the glances of a king, who enjoys life, while Bongrand, who had recognised Claude and his friends, approached them with outstretched feverish hands, and called attention to the sculptor with a nervous jerk of the chin, saying, ‘There’s a fellow I envy! Ah! to be confident of always producing masterpieces!’
His group of followers was in a frenzy, while he himself couldn't find a better way to show how much he adored himself. Suddenly, there was a small commotion. Bongrand, who had been walking around with his hands behind his back and glancing aimlessly, had just bumped into Chambouvard. The crowd, stepping back, whispered and watched the two famous artists shake hands; one was short and lively, while the other was tall and restless. Some friendly remarks were overheard. "Always fresh wonders." "Of course! And you, nothing this year?" "No, nothing; I'm taking a break, searching—" "Come on, you joker! No need to search, it just happens." "Goodbye." "Goodbye." And Chambouvard, followed by his entourage, was already moving slowly away through the crowd, looking like a king enjoying life, while Bongrand, having spotted Claude and his friends, approached them with eager outstretched hands, pointing at the sculptor with a nervous nod, saying, "There's a guy I envy! Ah! To be so sure you'll always create masterpieces!"
He complimented Mahoudeau on his ‘Vintaging Girl’; showed himself paternal to all of them, with that broad-minded good-nature of his, the free and easy manner of an old Bohemian of the romantic school, who had settled down and was decorated. Then, turning to Claude:
He praised Mahoudeau for his 'Vintaging Girl'; he acted fatherly towards all of them, with his open-minded good nature and the relaxed style of an old Bohemian from the romantic era who had settled down and received recognition. Then, turning to Claude:
‘Well, what did I tell you? Did you see upstairs? You have become the chief of a school.’
‘Well, what did I say? Did you check out upstairs? You've become the leader of a school.’
‘Ah! yes,’ replied Claude. ‘They are giving it me nicely. You are the master of us all.’
‘Oh! yes,’ replied Claude. ‘They’re treating me well. You’re the boss of us all.’
But Bongrand made his usual gesture of vague suffering and went off, saying, ‘Hold your tongue! I am not even my own master.’
But Bongrand made his typical gesture of vague discomfort and walked away, saying, ‘Shut up! I’m not even in control of my own life.’
For a few moments longer the band wandered through the garden. They had gone back to look at the ‘Vintaging Girl,’ when Jory noticed that Gagnière no longer had Irma Bécot on his arm. Gagnière was stupefied; where the deuce could he have lost her? But when Fagerolles had told him that she had gone off in the crowd with two gentlemen, he recovered his composure, and followed the others, lighter of heart now that he was relieved of that girl who had bewildered him.
For a little while longer, the group roamed through the garden. They had returned to check out the 'Vintaging Girl' when Jory noticed that Gagnière no longer had Irma Bécot with him. Gagnière was stunned; where on earth could he have lost her? But when Fagerolles told him that she had disappeared into the crowd with two guys, he regained his composure and followed the others, feeling lighter now that he was free from the girl who had confused him.
People now only moved about with difficulty. All the seats were taken by storm; groups blocked up the paths, where the promenaders paused every now and then, flowing back around the successful bits of bronze and marble. From the crowded buffet there arose a loud buzzing, a clatter of saucers and spoons which mingled with the throb of life pervading the vast nave. The sparrows had flown up to the forest of iron girders again, and one could hear their sharp little chirps, the twittering with which they serenaded the setting sun, under the warm panes of the glass roof. The atmosphere, moreover, had become heavy, there was a damp greenhouse-like warmth; the air, stationary as it was, had an odour as of humus, freshly turned over. And rising above the garden throng, the din of the first-floor galleries, the tramping of feet on their iron-girdered flooring still rolled on with the clamour of a tempest beating against a cliff.
People were now moving around with great difficulty. All the seats were claimed; groups crowded the paths, where people occasionally paused, flowing back around the impressive bronze and marble pieces. From the busy buffet, there was a loud buzz and a clatter of saucers and spoons that mixed with the vibrant energy filling the vast hall. The sparrows had darted back up to the forest of iron beams, and you could hear their sharp little chirps, the twittering that serenaded the setting sun under the warm glass roof. The atmosphere had grown heavy, with a damp, greenhouse-like warmth; the stagnant air had an odor of freshly turned soil. Above the bustling crowd, the noise from the first-floor galleries, along with the sound of feet on the iron-girdered floor, continued to roll on like a storm crashing against a cliff.
Claude, who had a keen perception of that rumbling storm, ended by hearing nothing else; it had been let loose and was howling in his ears. It was the merriment of the crowd whose jeers and laughter swept hurricane-like past his picture. With a weary gesture he exclaimed:
Claude, who could sense that brewing storm, ended up hearing nothing else; it had been unleashed and was roaring in his ears. It was the excitement of the crowd, whose taunts and laughter rushed by like a hurricane past his painting. With a tired gesture, he exclaimed:
‘Come, what are we messing about here for? I sha’n’t take anything at the refreshment bar, it reeks of the Institute. Let’s go and have a glass of beer outside, eh?’
‘Come on, what are we wasting time for? I’m not getting anything at the snack bar; it smells like the Institute. Let’s go grab a beer outside, okay?’
They all went out, with sinking legs and tired faces, expressive of contempt. Once outside, on finding themselves again face to face with healthy mother Nature in her springtide season, they breathed noisily with an air of delight. It had barely struck four o’clock, the slanting sun swept along the Champs Elysées and everything flared: the serried rows of carriages, like the fresh foliage of the trees, and the sheaf-like fountains which spouted up and whirled away in golden dust. With a sauntering step they went hesitatingly down the central avenue, and finally stranded in a little café, the Pavillon de la Concorde, on the left, just before reaching the Place. The place was so small that they sat down outside it at the edge of the footway, despite the chill which fell from a vault of leaves, already fully grown and gloomy. But beyond the four rows of chestnut-trees, beyond the belt of verdant shade, they could see the sunlit roadway of the main avenue where Paris passed before them as in a nimbus, the carriages with their wheels radiating like stars, the big yellow omnibuses, looking even more profusely gilded than triumphal chariots, the horsemen whose steeds seemed to raise clouds of sparks, and the foot passengers whom the light enveloped in splendour.
They all went outside, with tired legs and tired faces that showed their disdain. Once out, faced again with healthy Mother Nature in her springtime glory, they breathed in deeply with a sense of joy. It was barely four o’clock; the slanting sun lit up the Champs Elysées and everything glowed: the tidy rows of carriages, the fresh green foliage of the trees, and the fountain sprays that shot up and sparkled like golden dust. They strolled hesitantly down the main avenue and finally ended up at a small café, the Pavillon de la Concorde, on the left, just before reaching the square. The place was so small that they sat outside at the edge of the sidewalk, despite the chill coming from the dense, leafy canopy above, already fully grown and dark. But beyond the four rows of chestnut trees, beyond the ring of greenery, they could see the sunlit road of the main avenue where Paris unfolded like a glowing halo, carriages with wheels shining like stars, large yellow omnibuses that looked even more lavish than triumphal chariots, horse riders whose horses seemed to kick up clouds of sparks, and pedestrians surrounded by light and splendor.
And during nearly three hours, with his beer untasted before him, Claude went on talking and arguing amid a growing fever, broken down as he was in body, and with his mind full of all the painting he had just seen. It was the usual winding up of their visit to the Salon, though this year they were more impassioned on account of the liberal measure of the Emperor.
And for almost three hours, with his beer untouched in front of him, Claude kept talking and debating with increasing intensity, feeling physically drained but with his mind buzzing from all the art he had just seen. It was the typical way they wrapped up their visit to the Salon, but this year they were even more passionate because of the generous policies from the Emperor.
‘Well, and what of it, if the public does laugh?’ cried Claude. ‘We must educate the public, that’s all. In reality it’s a victory. Take away two hundred grotesque canvases, and our Salon beats theirs. We have courage and audacity—we are the future. Yes, yes, you’ll see it later on; we shall kill their Salon. We shall enter it as conquerors, by dint of producing masterpieces. Laugh, laugh, you big stupid Paris—laugh until you fall on your knees before us!’
‘Well, so what if the public laughs?’ shouted Claude. ‘We just have to educate them, that’s all. Honestly, it’s a win for us. Take away two hundred ridiculous paintings, and our Salon is better than theirs. We have the courage and boldness—we are the future. Yes, yes, you’ll see it later; we will put an end to their Salon. We’ll step in as conquerors, by creating masterpieces. Laugh, laugh, you foolish Paris—laugh until you’re on your knees before us!’
And stopping short, he pointed prophetically to the triumphal avenue, where the luxury and happiness of the city went rolling by in the sunlight. His arms stretched out till they embraced even the Place de la Concorde, which could be seen slantwise from where they sat under the trees—the Place de la Concorde, with the plashing water of one of its fountains, a strip of balustrade, and two of its statues—Rouen, with the gigantic bosom, and Lille, thrusting forward her huge bare foot.
And abruptly stopping, he gestured dramatically toward the grand avenue, where the city's wealth and joy flowed by in the sunlight. His arms stretched out until they included the Place de la Concorde, visible at an angle from where they were sitting under the trees—the Place de la Concorde, with the splashing water from one of its fountains, a section of balustrade, and two of its statues—Rouen, with her massive chest, and Lille, showing off her large bare foot.
‘“In the open air”—it amuses them, eh?’ he resumed. ‘All right, since they are bent on it, the “open air” then, the school of the “open air!” Eh! it was a thing strictly between us, it didn’t exist yesterday beyond the circle of a few painters. But now they throw the word upon the winds, and they found the school. Oh! I’m agreeable. Let it be the school of the “open air!”’
‘“In the open air”—that makes them laugh, right?’ he continued. ‘Fine, since they’re set on it, the “open air” then, the school of the “open air!” Right? It was something just between us; it didn’t exist until yesterday outside of a few painters. But now they’re throwing the term around, and they’ve created the school. Oh! I’m okay with that. Let it be the school of the “open air!”’
Jory slapped his thighs.
Jory smacked his thighs.
‘Didn’t I tell you? I felt sure of making them bite with those articles of mine, the idiots that they are. Ah! how we’ll plague them now.’
‘Didn’t I tell you? I was sure I could get them to buy those pieces of mine, those idiots. Ah! how we’re going to torment them now.’
Mahoudeau also was singing victory, constantly dragging in his ‘Vintaging Girl,’ the daring points of which he explained to the silent Chaîne, the only one who listened to him; while Gagnière, with the sternness of a timid man waxing wroth over questions of pure theory, spoke of guillotining the Institute; and Sandoz, with the glowing sympathy of a hard worker, and Dubuche, giving way to the contagion of revolutionary friendship, became exasperated, and struck the table, swallowing up Paris with each draught of beer. Fagerolles, very calm, retained his usual smile. He had accompanied them for the sake of amusement, for the singular pleasure which he found in urging his comrades into farcical affairs that were bound to turn out badly. At the very moment when he was lashing their spirit of revolt, he himself formed the firm resolution to work in future for the Prix de Rome. That day had decided him; he thought it idiotic to compromise his prospects any further.
Mahoudeau was also celebrating, constantly bringing up his ‘Vintaging Girl,’ the bold points of which he explained to the quiet Chaîne, the only one who paid attention; while Gagnière, with the seriousness of a shy person getting angry over theoretical issues, talked about shutting down the Institute; and Sandoz, filled with the passionate support of a dedicated worker, and Dubuche, caught up in the fervor of revolutionary friendship, got frustrated, hitting the table and gulping down beer like it could swallow up Paris. Fagerolles, very calm, kept his usual smile. He was with them for fun, enjoying the odd thrill of pushing his friends into ridiculous situations that were sure to end badly. At that very moment, while he was stirring up their rebellious spirit, he made a firm decision to work toward the Prix de Rome in the future. That day had influenced him; he thought it was foolish to jeopardize his prospects any further.
The sun was declining on the horizon, there was now only a returning stream of carriages, coming back from the Bois in the pale golden shimmer of the sunset. And the exodus from the Salon must have been nearly over; a long string of pedestrians passed by, gentlemen who looked like critics, each with a catalogue under his arm.
The sun was setting on the horizon, and there was now just a stream of carriages heading back from the Bois in the soft golden glow of the sunset. The exodus from the Salon must have been almost finished; a long line of pedestrians walked by, men who looked like critics, each carrying a catalogue under his arm.
But all at once Gagnière became enthusiastic: ‘Ah! Courajod, there was one who had his share in inventing landscape painting! Have you seen his “Pond of Gagny” at the Luxembourg?’
But suddenly Gagnière got excited: ‘Ah! Courajod, he was one who contributed to inventing landscape painting! Have you seen his “Pond of Gagny” at the Luxembourg?’
‘A marvel!’ exclaimed Claude. ‘It was painted thirty years ago, and nothing more substantial has been turned out since. Why is it left at the Luxembourg? It ought to be in the Louvre.’
‘A marvel!’ exclaimed Claude. ‘It was painted thirty years ago, and nothing more significant has been produced since. Why is it still at the Luxembourg? It should be in the Louvre.’
‘But Courajod isn’t dead,’ said Fagerolles.
‘But Courajod isn’t dead,’ Fagerolles said.
‘What! Courajod isn’t dead! No one ever sees him or speaks of him now.’
‘What! Courajod isn’t dead! No one ever sees him or talks about him now.’
There was general stupefaction when Fagerolles assured them that the great landscape painter, now seventy years of age, lived somewhere in the neighbourhood of Montmartre, in a little house among his fowls, ducks, and dogs. So one might outlive one’s own glory! To think that there were such melancholy instances of old artists disappearing before their death! Silence fell upon them all; they began to shiver when they perceived Bongrand pass by on a friend’s arm, with a congestive face and a nervous air as he waved his hand to them; while almost immediately behind him, surrounded by his disciples, came Chambouvard, laughing very loudly, and tapping his heels on the pavement with the air of absolute mastery that comes from confidence in immortality.
Everyone was shocked when Fagerolles told them that the great landscape painter, now seventy years old, lived somewhere near Montmartre, in a small house with his chickens, ducks, and dogs. Who would have thought that one could outlive their own fame? It was sad to realize that there were such gloomy examples of older artists fading away before they died! A hush fell over them; they started to shiver when they saw Bongrand passing by on a friend's arm, with a flushed face and a nervous vibe as he waved to them. Almost immediately behind him, surrounded by his followers, came Chambouvard, laughing loudly and tapping his heels on the pavement with the air of complete mastery that comes from confidence in immortality.
‘What! are you going?’ said Mahoudeau to Chaîne, who was rising from his chair.
‘What! Are you leaving?’ Mahoudeau said to Chaîne, who was getting up from his chair.
The other mumbled some indistinct words in his beard, and went off after distributing handshakes among the party.
The other person muttered some unclear words under his breath and walked away after shaking hands with everyone in the group.
‘I know,’ said Jory to Mahoudeau. ‘I believe he has a weakness for your neighbour, the herbalist woman. I saw his eyes flash all at once; it comes upon him like toothache. Look how he’s running over there.’
‘I know,’ Jory said to Mahoudeau. ‘I think he has a thing for your neighbor, the herbalist woman. I saw his eyes light up suddenly; it hits him like a toothache. Look how he’s rushing over there.’
The sculptor shrugged his shoulders amidst the general laughter.
The sculptor shrugged his shoulders as everyone laughed.
But Claude did not hear. He was now discussing architecture with Dubuche. No doubt, that plan of a museum gallery which he exhibited wasn’t bad; only there was nothing new in it. It was all so much patient marquetry of the school formulas. Ought not all the arts to advance in one line of battle? Ought not the evolution that was transforming literature, painting, even music itself, to renovate architecture as well? If ever the architecture of a period was to have a style of its own, it was assuredly the architecture of the period they would soon be entering, a new period when they would find the ground freshly swept, ready for the rebuilding of everything. Down with the Greek temples! there was no reason why they should continue to exist under our sky, amid our society! down with the Gothic cathedrals, since faith in legend was dead! down with the delicate colonnades, the lace-like work of the Renaissance—that revival of the antique grafted on mediaevalism—precious art-jewellery, no doubt, but in which democracy could not dwell. And he demanded, he called with violent gestures for an architectural formula suited to democracy; such work in stone as would express its tenets; edifices where it would really be at home; something vast and strong, great and simple at the same time; the something that was already being indicated in the new railway stations and markets, whose ironwork displayed such solid elegance, but purified and raised to a standard of beauty, proclaiming the grandeur of the intellectual conquests of the age.
But Claude didn’t hear. He was now discussing architecture with Dubuche. No doubt, the museum gallery design he presented wasn’t bad; it just didn’t have anything new. It was all just meticulous marquetry of old school formulas. Shouldn’t all the arts move forward together? Shouldn’t the changes happening in literature, painting, and even music transform architecture too? If any period of architecture was meant to have its own unique style, it was definitely the one they were about to enter—a new era where the ground would be freshly cleared, ready for a complete rebuild. Down with the Greek temples! There’s no reason for them to still exist among us! Down with the Gothic cathedrals since belief in legend is dead! Down with the delicate colonnades and the lacework of the Renaissance— that revival of ancient styles mixed with medieval elements—beautiful art, no doubt, but not something democracy could live in. He demanded, with passionate gestures, an architectural style suited to democracy; structures that would express its principles; buildings where it could truly feel at home; something vast and strong, grand yet simple at the same time; something that was already being seen in the new railway stations and markets, whose ironwork showed solid elegance, but refined and elevated to a standard of beauty, announcing the greatness of the intellectual achievements of the time.
‘Ah! yes, ah! yes,’ repeated Dubuche, catching Claude’s enthusiasm; ‘that’s what I want to accomplish, you’ll see some day. Give me time to succeed, and when I’m my own master—ah! when I’m my own master.’
‘Ah! yes, ah! yes,’ repeated Dubuche, catching Claude’s enthusiasm; ‘that’s what I want to achieve, you’ll see someday. Give me time to succeed, and when I’m in charge—ah! when I’m in charge.’
Night was coming on apace, and Claude was growing more and more animated and passionate, displaying a fluency, an eloquence which his comrades had not known him to possess. They all grew excited in listening to him, and ended by becoming noisily gay over the extraordinary witticisms he launched forth. He himself, having returned to the subject of his picture, again discussed it with a deal of gaiety, caricaturing the crowd he had seen looking at it, and imitating the imbecile laughter. Along the avenue, now of an ashy hue, one only saw the shadows of infrequent vehicles dart by. The side-walk was quite black; an icy chill fell from the trees. Nothing broke the stillness but the sound of song coming from a clump of verdure behind the café; there was some rehearsal at the Concert de l’Horloge, for one heard the sentimental voice of a girl trying a love-song.
Night was falling quickly, and Claude was becoming more animated and passionate, showing a fluency and eloquence that his friends hadn’t seen before. They all got excited listening to him, ending up in a noisy laughter over his amazing jokes. He returned to talking about his painting with a lot of cheer, making fun of the crowd he had seen looking at it and imitating their foolish laughter. Down the avenue, now gray, only the shadows of a few passing vehicles could be seen. The sidewalk was completely dark; a cold chill came from the trees. The only sound breaking the stillness was a song coming from a patch of greenery behind the café; there was a rehearsal at the Concert de l’Horloge, where you could hear a girl’s sentimental voice trying out a love song.
‘Ah! how they amused me, the idiots!’ exclaimed Claude, in a last burst. ‘Do you know, I wouldn’t take a hundred thousand francs for my day’s pleasure!’
‘Ah! how they entertained me, those fools!’ exclaimed Claude, in a final outburst. ‘You know, I wouldn’t trade a hundred thousand francs for the enjoyment I had today!’
Then he relapsed into silence, thoroughly exhausted. Nobody had any saliva left; silence reigned; they all shivered in the icy gust that swept by. And they separated in a sort of bewilderment, shaking hands in a tired fashion. Dubuche was going to dine out; Fagerolles had an appointment; in vain did Jory, Mahoudeau, and Gagnière try to drag Claude to Foucart’s, a twenty-five sous’ restaurant; Sandoz was already taking him away on his arm, feeling anxious at seeing him so excited.
Then he fell silent, completely worn out. No one had any saliva left; silence took over; they all trembled in the freezing wind that blew past. They parted in a kind of daze, shaking hands wearily. Dubuche was headed out for dinner; Fagerolles had a meeting; Jory, Mahoudeau, and Gagnière tried in vain to persuade Claude to join them at Foucart's, a restaurant that cost twenty-five sous; Sandoz was already guiding him away on his arm, worried to see him so worked up.
‘Come along, I promised my mother to be back for dinner. You’ll take a bit with us. It will be nice; we’ll finish the day together.’
‘Come on, I promised my mom I’d be back for dinner. You’ll join us for a bit. It’ll be nice; we’ll wrap up the day together.’
They both went down the quay, past the Tuileries, walking side by side in fraternal fashion. But at the Pont des Saints-Pères the painter stopped short.
They both walked down the quay, past the Tuileries, side by side like brothers. But at the Pont des Saints-Pères, the painter suddenly stopped.
‘What, are you going to leave me?’ exclaimed Sandoz.
‘What, are you really going to leave me?’ exclaimed Sandoz.
‘Why, I thought you were going to dine with me?’
‘Why, I thought you were going to have dinner with me?’
‘No, thanks; I’ve too bad a headache—I’m going home to bed.’
‘No, thanks; I have a terrible headache—I’m going home to bed.’
And he obstinately clung to this excuse.
And he stubbornly held onto this excuse.
‘All right, old man,’ said Sandoz at last, with a smile. ‘One doesn’t see much of you nowadays. You live in mystery. Go on, old boy, I don’t want to be in your way.’
‘All right, old man,’ said Sandoz at last, with a smile. ‘You don’t show up much these days. You’re kind of a mystery. Go on, buddy, I don’t want to hold you up.’
Claude restrained a gesture of impatience; and, letting his friend cross the bridge, he went his way along the quays by himself. He walked on with his arms hanging beside him, with his face turned towards the ground, seeing nothing, but taking long strides like a somnambulist who is guided by instinct. On the Quai de Bourbon, in front of his door, he looked up, full of surprise on seeing a cab waiting at the edge of the foot pavement, and barring his way. And it was with the same automatical step that he entered the doorkeeper’s room to take his key.
Claude held back a gesture of impatience and, allowing his friend to cross the bridge, continued on his own along the quays. He walked with his arms hanging by his sides, his face looking down, not seeing anything, but taking long strides like a sleepwalker guided by instinct. On the Quai de Bourbon, in front of his door, he looked up in surprise to see a cab waiting at the edge of the sidewalk, blocking his path. It was with the same automatic steps that he entered the doorkeeper’s room to get his key.
‘I have given it to that lady,’ called Madame Joseph from the back of the room. ‘She is upstairs.’
‘I gave it to that lady,’ called Madame Joseph from the back of the room. ‘She’s upstairs.’
‘What lady?’ he asked in bewilderment.
"Which lady?" he asked, confused.
‘That young person. Come, you know very well, the one who always comes.’
‘That young person. Come on, you know exactly who I mean, the one who always shows up.’
He had not the remotest idea whom she meant. Still, in his utter confusion of mind, he decided to go upstairs. The key was in the door, which he slowly opened and closed again.
He had no clue who she was talking about. Still, in his total confusion, he decided to go upstairs. The key was in the door, which he slowly opened and then closed again.
For a moment Claude stood stock still. Darkness had invaded the studio; a violet dimness, a melancholy gloom fell from the large window, enveloping everything. He could no longer plainly distinguish either the floor, or the furniture, or the sketches; everything that was lying about seemed to be melting in the stagnant waters of a pool. But on the edge of the couch there loomed a dark figure, stiff with waiting, anxious and despairing amid the last gasp of daylight. It was Christine; he recognised her.
For a moment, Claude stood completely still. Darkness had filled the studio; a purple dimness, a sad gloom streamed in from the large window, covering everything. He could no longer clearly make out the floor, the furniture, or the sketches; everything scattered around seemed to be sinking into the stillness like objects in a pool. But on the edge of the couch, a dark figure loomed, frozen with anticipation, anxious and hopeless in the final light of day. It was Christine; he recognized her.
She held out her hands, and murmured in a low, halting voice:
She held out her hands and spoke in a soft, hesitant voice:
‘I have been here for three hours; yes, for three hours, all alone, and listening. I took a cab on leaving there, and I only wanted to stay a minute, and get back as soon as possible. But I should have stayed all night; I could not go away without shaking hands with you.’
‘I’ve been here for three hours; yeah, for three hours, all by myself, just listening. I grabbed a cab when I left, and I only meant to stay for a minute, then head back as quickly as I could. But I should have stayed all night; I couldn’t leave without shaking your hand.’
She continued, and told him of her mad desire to see the picture; her prank of going to the Salon, and how she had tumbled into it amidst the storm of laughter, amidst the jeers of all those people. It was she whom they had hissed like that; it was on herself that they had spat. And seized with wild terror, distracted with grief and shame, she had fled, as if she could feel that laughter lashing her like a whip, until the blood flowed. But she now forgot about herself in her concern for him, upset by the thought of the grief he must feel, for her womanly sensibility magnified the bitterness of the repulse, and she was eager to console.
She went on and shared her overwhelming urge to see the painting; her mischievous act of visiting the Salon, and how she stumbled into it amidst the uproar of laughter, amid the jeers of all those people. It was her they had booed like that; it was on her they had spat. And struck by a wild fear, consumed by grief and shame, she had run away, as if she could feel their laughter whipping at her, until she bled. But now she forgot about herself as she worried about him, troubled by the thought of the pain he must feel, as her sensitivity amplified the sting of the rejection, and she was eager to offer comfort.
‘Oh, friend, don’t grieve! I wished to see and tell you that they are jealous of it all, that I found the picture very nice, and that I feel very proud and happy at having helped you—at being, if ever so little, a part of it.’
‘Oh, friend, don’t be sad! I wanted to see you and tell you that they are jealous of everything, that I thought the picture was really nice, and that I feel proud and happy to have helped you—being, even if just a little, a part of it.’
Still, motionless, he listened to her as she stammered those tender words in an ardent voice, and suddenly he sank down at her feet, letting his head fall upon her knees, and bursting into tears. All his excitement of the afternoon, all the bravery he had shown amidst the jeering, all his gaiety and violence now collapsed, in a fit of sobs which well nigh choked him. From the gallery where the laughter had buffeted him, he heard it pursuing him through the Champs Elysées, then along the banks of the Seine, and now in his very studio. His strength was utterly spent; he felt weaker than a child; and rolling his head from one side to another he repeated in a stifled voice:
Still, frozen in place, he listened to her as she stumbled over those tender words in a passionate voice. Suddenly, he sank down at her feet, letting his head drop onto her knees, and broke down in tears. All the excitement of the afternoon, all the bravery he had shown in the face of mockery, all his cheerfulness and aggression now crumbled into a fit of sobs that nearly choked him. From the gallery where the laughter had attacked him, he heard it chasing him through the Champs Elysées, then along the banks of the Seine, and now right in his studio. His strength was completely gone; he felt weaker than a child; and rolling his head from side to side, he repeated in a muffled voice:
‘My God! how I do suffer!’
‘My God! I’m suffering so much!’
Then she, with both hands, raised his face to her lips in a transport of passion. She kissed him, and with her warm breath she blew to his very heart the words: ‘Be quiet, be quiet, I love you!’
Then she, using both hands, lifted his face to her lips in a rush of passion. She kissed him, and with her warm breath, she whispered to his heart the words: ‘Shh, shh, I love you!’
They adored each other; it was inevitable. Near them, on the centre of the table, the lilac she had sent him that morning embalmed the night air, and, alone shiny with lingering light, the scattered particles of gold leaf, wafted from the frame of the big picture, twinkled like a swarming of stars.
They loved each other; it was bound to happen. In the middle of the table, the lilac she had sent him that morning filled the night air with its scent, and, alone and gleaming with leftover light, the bits of gold leaf floating from the big picture frame sparkled like a swarm of stars.
VI
THE very next morning, at seven o’clock, Christine was at the studio, her face still flushed by the falsehood which she had told Madame Vanzade about a young friend from Clermont whom she was to meet at the station, and with whom she should spend the day.
THE very next morning, at seven o’clock, Christine was at the studio, her face still flushed by the lie she had told Madame Vanzade about a young friend from Clermont whom she was supposed to meet at the station, and with whom she would spend the day.
Claude, overjoyed by the idea of spending a whole day with her, wanted to take her into the country, far away under the glorious sunlight, so as to have her entirely to himself. She was delighted; they scampered off like lunatics, and reached the St. Lazare Station just in time to catch the Havre train. He knew, beyond Mantes, a little village called Bennecourt, where there was an artists’ inn which he had at times invaded with some comrades; and careless as to the two hours’ rail, he took her to lunch there, just as he would have taken her to Asnières. She made very merry over this journey, to which there seemed no end. So much the better if it were to take them to the end of the world! It seemed to them as if evening would never come.
Claude, thrilled at the thought of spending a whole day with her, wanted to take her out to the countryside, far away under the beautiful sunlight, so he could have her all to himself. She was excited; they rushed off like crazy people and arrived at the St. Lazare Station just in time to catch the train to Havre. He knew of a small village beyond Mantes called Bennecourt, where there was an inn for artists that he had sometimes visited with friends; and without worrying about the two-hour train ride, he took her there for lunch, just like he would have taken her to Asnières. She was having a blast on this journey, which felt like it would never end. Even better if it took them to the ends of the earth! It seemed to them that evening would never arrive.
At ten o’clock they alighted at Bonnières; and there they took the ferry—an old ferry-boat that creaked and grated against its chain—for Bennecourt is situated on the opposite bank of the Seine. It was a splendid May morning, the rippling waters were spangled with gold in the sunlight, the young foliage showed delicately green against the cloudless azure. And, beyond the islets situated at this point of the river, how delightful it was to find the country inn, with its little grocery business attached, its large common room smelling of soapsuds, and its spacious yard full of manure, on which the ducks disported themselves.
At ten o’clock, they got off at Bonnières and took the ferry—an old boat that creaked and scraped against its chain—because Bennecourt is on the opposite bank of the Seine. It was a beautiful May morning, the rippling waters sparkled with gold in the sunlight, and the young leaves looked a delicate green against the clear blue sky. And beyond the small islands in the river, it was charming to find the countryside inn with its little grocery store, its large common room smelling of soap, and its big yard full of manure where the ducks were playing around.
‘Hallo, Faucheur! we have come to lunch. An omelette, some sausages, and some cheese, eh?’
‘Hey, Faucheur! We’ve come for lunch. An omelet, some sausages, and some cheese, right?’
‘Are you going to stay the night, Monsieur Claude?’
‘Are you going to stay the night, Mr. Claude?’
‘No, no; another time. And some white wine; eh? you know that pinky wine, that grates a bit in the throat.’
‘No, no; another time. And some white wine, okay? You know that pink wine, the one that sort of scratches in the throat.’
Christine had already followed mother Faucheur to the barn-yard, and when the latter came back with her eggs, she asked Claude with her artful peasant’s laugh:
Christine had already followed Mother Faucheur to the barnyard, and when she returned with her eggs, she asked Claude with her clever peasant laugh:
‘And so now you’re married?’
'So now you're married?'
‘Well,’ replied the painter without hesitation, ‘it looks like it since I’m with my wife.’
‘Well,’ replied the painter without hesitation, ‘that seems to be the case since I’m with my wife.’
The lunch was exquisite: the omelette overdone, the sausages too greasy, and the bread so hard that he had to cut it into fingers for Christine lest she should hurt her wrist. They emptied two bottles of wine, and began a third, becoming so gay and noisy that they ended by feeling bewildered in the long room, where they partook of the meal all alone. She, with her cheeks aflame, declared that she was tipsy; it had never happened to her before, and she thought it very funny. Oh! so funny, and she burst into uncontrollable laughter.
The lunch was amazing: the omelette was overcooked, the sausages too greasy, and the bread so hard that he had to cut it into pieces for Christine so she wouldn’t hurt her wrist. They finished two bottles of wine and started on a third, getting so cheerful and loud that they ended up feeling a bit lost in the long room where they ate alone. With her cheeks flushed, she said she was tipsy; it had never happened to her before, and she found it really funny. Oh! So funny, and she started laughing uncontrollably.
‘Let us get a breath of air,’ she said at last.
‘Let’s get some fresh air,’ she said at last.
‘Yes, let’s take a stroll. We must start back at four o’clock; so we have three hours before us.’
‘Yes, let’s take a walk. We need to head back by four o’clock, so we have three hours ahead of us.’
They went up the village of Bennecourt, whose yellow houses straggle along the river bank for about a couple of thousand yards. All the villagers were in the fields; they only met three cows, led by a little girl. He, with an outstretched arm, told her all about the locality; seemed to know whither he was going, and when they had reached the last house—an old building, standing on the bank of the Seine, just opposite the slopes of Jeufosse—turned round it, and entered a wood of oak trees. It was like the end of the world, roofed in with foliage, through which the sun alone penetrated in narrow tongues of flame. And there they could stroll and talk and kiss in freedom.
They walked up to the village of Bennecourt, where the yellow houses stretch along the riverbank for about two thousand yards. All the villagers were out in the fields; they only saw three cows being led by a little girl. He, with an outstretched arm, told her all about the area; he seemed to know where he was going, and when they reached the last house—an old building sitting on the banks of the Seine, directly across from the slopes of Jeufosse—they turned around it and entered an oak tree forest. It felt like the edge of the world, covered in foliage, where sunlight filtered through in thin beams. And there, they could walk, chat, and kiss freely.
When at last it became necessary for them to retrace their steps, they found a peasant standing at the open doorway of the house by the wood-side. Claude recognised the man and called to him:
When it finally became necessary for them to go back, they saw a farmer standing in the open doorway of the house by the woods. Claude recognized the man and called out to him:
‘Hallo, Porrette! Does that shanty belong to you?’
‘Hey, Porrette! Does that shack belong to you?’
At this the old fellow, with tears in his eyes, related that it did, and that his tenants had gone away without paying him, leaving their furniture behind. And he invited them inside.
At this, the old man, with tears in his eyes, shared that it did, and that his tenants had left without paying him, leaving their furniture behind. And he invited them inside.
‘There’s no harm in looking; you may know somebody who would like to take the place. There are many Parisians who’d be glad of it. Three hundred francs a year, with the furniture; it’s for nothing, eh?’
‘There’s no harm in looking; you might know someone who would like to take the spot. There are plenty of Parisians who would appreciate it. Three hundred francs a year, including the furniture; it’s basically free, right?’
They inquisitively followed him inside. It was a rambling old place that seemed to have been cut out of a barn. Downstairs they found an immense kitchen and a dining-room, in which one might have given a dance; upstairs were two rooms also, so vast that one seemed lost in them. As for the furniture, it consisted of a walnut bedstead in one of the rooms, and of a table and some household utensils in the kitchen. But in front of the house the neglected garden was planted with magnificent apricot trees, and overgrown with large rose-bushes in full bloom; while at the back there was a potato field reaching as far as the oak wood, and surrounded by a quick-set hedge.
They curiously followed him inside. It was a sprawling old place that looked like it had been taken from a barn. Downstairs, they found a huge kitchen and a dining room that could host a dance; upstairs were two rooms so large that you could easily get lost in them. The furniture was minimal, featuring a walnut bed in one of the rooms, along with a table and some kitchen utensils. However, in front of the house, the overgrown garden was filled with stunning apricot trees and large rose bushes in full bloom; at the back, there was a potato field that stretched all the way to the oak woods, surrounded by a quick-set hedge.
‘I’d leave the potatoes as they are,’ said old Porrette.
‘I’d leave the potatoes as they are,’ said old Porrette.
Claude and Christine looked at each other with one of those sudden cravings for solitude and forgetfulness common to lovers. Ah! how sweet it would be to love one another there in the depths of that nook, so far away from everybody else! But they smiled. Was such a thing to be thought of? They had barely time to catch the train that was to take them back to Paris. And the old peasant, who was Madame Faucheur’s father, accompanied them along the river bank, and as they were stepping into the ferry-boat, shouted to them, after quite an inward struggle:
Claude and Christine glanced at each other, feeling that familiar urge for solitude and escape that lovers often experience. Oh, how wonderful it would be to love each other in that quiet little spot, far away from everyone else! But they smiled. Could they even think of such a thing? They barely had enough time to catch the train that would take them back to Paris. And the old peasant, who was Madame Faucheur’s father, walked with them along the riverbank, and just as they were getting into the ferry-boat, he called out to them after a moment of hesitation:
‘You know, I’ll make it two hundred and fifty francs—send me some people.’
‘You know, I’ll make it two hundred and fifty francs—send me some people.’
On reaching Paris, Claude accompanied Christine to Madame Vanzade’s door. They had grown very sad. They exchanged a long handshake, silent and despairing, not daring to kiss each other there.
On arriving in Paris, Claude walked Christine to Madame Vanzade’s door. They had become very sad. They shared a long handshake, silent and hopeless, not daring to kiss each other there.
A life of torment then began. In the course of a fortnight she was only able to call on three occasions; and she arrived panting, having but a few minutes at her disposal, for it so happened that the old lady had just then become very exacting. Claude questioned her, feeling uneasy at seeing her look so pale and out of sorts, with her eyes bright with fever. Never had that pious house, that vault, without air or light, where she died of boredom, caused her so much suffering. Her fits of giddiness had come upon her again; the want of exercise made the blood throb in her temples. She owned to him that she had fainted one evening in her room, as if she had been suddenly strangled by a leaden hand. Still she did not say a word against her employer; on the contrary, she softened on speaking of her: the poor creature, so old and so infirm, and so kind-hearted, who called her daughter! She felt as if she were committing a wicked act each time that she forsook her to hurry to her lover’s.
A life of torment began. Over the course of two weeks, she could only visit three times; and she arrived out of breath, with only a few minutes to spare, because the old lady had become very demanding. Claude questioned her, feeling uneasy seeing her so pale and out of sorts, her eyes shining with fever. Never had that pious home, that dark and airless place where she suffered from boredom, caused her so much pain. Her dizzy spells had returned; the lack of exercise made her blood pound in her temples. She confessed to him that she had fainted one evening in her room, as if a heavy hand had suddenly strangled her. Still, she didn’t say anything bad about her employer; on the contrary, she softened when speaking of her: the poor woman, so old and frail, and so kind-hearted, who called her daughter! She felt as if she were doing something terrible every time she left her to rush to her lover’s.
Two more weeks went by, and the falsehoods with which Christine had to buy, as it were, each hour of liberty became intolerable to her. She loved, she would have liked to proclaim it aloud, and her feelings revolted at having to hide her love like a crime, at having to lie basely, like a servant afraid of being sent away.
Two more weeks passed, and the lies that Christine had to tell just to enjoy each hour of freedom became unbearable for her. She loved, and she wanted to shout it out loud, but her feelings were outraged at having to conceal her love like it was a crime, at having to dishonestly hide it like a servant afraid of being fired.
At last, one evening in the studio, at the moment when she was leaving, she threw herself with a distracted gesture into Claude’s arms, sobbing with suffering and passion. ‘Ah! I cannot, I cannot—keep me with you; prevent me from going back.’
At last, one evening in the studio, just as she was leaving, she threw herself into Claude’s arms with a frantic gesture, crying from pain and passion. ‘Ah! I can’t, I can’t—don’t let me go; stop me from going back.’
He had caught hold of her, and was almost smothering her with kisses.
He had grabbed her and was almost suffocating her with kisses.
‘You really love me, then! Oh, my darling! But I am so very poor, and you would lose everything. Can I allow you to forego everything like this?’
‘You really love me, then! Oh, my darling! But I’m so broke, and you would lose everything. Can I let you give up all of that?’
She sobbed more violently still; her halting words were choked by her tears.
She cried even harder; her broken words were stopped by her tears.
‘The money, eh? which she might leave me? Do you think I calculate? I have never thought of it, I swear it to you! Ah! let her keep everything and let me be free! I have no ties, no relatives; can’t I be allowed to do as I like?’
‘The money, huh? that she might leave me? Do you think I'm thinking about it? I’ve never considered it, I promise you! Ah! Let her keep everything and just let me be free! I have no ties, no family; can’t I be allowed to do what I want?’
Then, in a last sob of agony: ‘Ah, you are right; it’s wrong to desert the poor woman. Ah! I despise myself. I wish I had the strength. But I love you too much, I suffer too much; surely you won’t let me die?’
Then, in a final sob of pain: ‘Ah, you’re right; it’s wrong to abandon the poor woman. Ah! I hate myself. I wish I had the strength. But I love you too much, I’m suffering too much; please don’t let me die?’
‘Oh!’ he cried in a passionate transport. ‘Let others die, there are but we two on earth.’
‘Oh!’ he exclaimed in a moment of intense emotion. ‘Let others die, there are only the two of us in the world.’
It was all so much madness. Christine left Madame Vanzade in the most brutal fashion. She took her trunk away the very next morning. She and Claude had at once remembered the deserted old house at Bennecourt, the giant rose-bushes, the immense rooms. Ah! to go away, to go away without the loss of an hour, to live at the world’s end in all the bliss of their passion! She clapped her hands for very joy. He, still smarting from his defeat, at the Salon, and anxious to recover from it, longed for complete rest in the country; yonder he would find the real ‘open air,’ he would work away with grass up to his neck and bring back masterpieces. In a couple of days everything was ready, the studio relinquished, the few household chattels conveyed to the railway station. Besides, they met with a slice of luck, for Papa Malgras gave some five hundred francs for a score of sketches, selected from among the waifs and strays of the removal. Thus they would be able to live like princes. Claude still had his income of a thousand francs a year; Christine, too, had saved some money, besides having her outfit and dresses. And away they went; it was perfect flight, friends avoided and not even warned by letter, Paris despised and forsaken amid laughter expressive of relief.
It was all such madness. Christine left Madame Vanzade in a really harsh way. She took her trunk the very next morning. She and Claude immediately thought of the abandoned old house at Bennecourt, the huge rose bushes, the enormous rooms. Ah! to leave, to leave without wasting a moment, to live at the world's end in the bliss of their passion! She clapped her hands out of pure joy. He, still stinging from his defeat at the Salon, and eager to bounce back, craved complete peace in the countryside; there he would find true ‘fresh air,’ work with grass up to his neck, and return with masterpieces. In just a couple of days, everything was set—the studio was vacated, and a few household items were sent to the train station. Plus, they caught a break when Papa Malgras paid about five hundred francs for a batch of sketches, chosen from the leftovers of their move. This meant they could live like royalty. Claude still had his annual income of a thousand francs; Christine had also saved some money and had her clothes. And off they went; it was a perfect escape, friends left behind and not even notified by letter, Paris dismissed and abandoned amid laughter of relief.
June was drawing to a close, and the rain fell in torrents during the week they spent in arranging their new home. They discovered that old Porrette had taken away half the kitchen utensils before signing the agreement. But that matter did not affect them. They took a delight in dabbling about amidst the showers; they made journeys three leagues long, as far as Vernon, to buy plates and saucepans, which they brought back with them in triumph. At last they got shipshape, occupying one of the upstairs rooms, abandoning the other to the mice, and transforming the dining-room into a studio; and, above all, as happy as children at taking their meals in the kitchen off a deal table, near the hearth where the soup sang in the pot. To wait upon them they engaged a girl from the village, who came every morning and went home at night. She was called Mélie, she was a niece of the Faucheurs, and her stupidity delighted them. In fact, one could not have found a greater idiot in the whole region.
June was coming to an end, and heavy rain fell during the week they spent setting up their new home. They found out that old Porrette had taken half the kitchen utensils before signing the agreement. But that didn’t bother them. They enjoyed messing around in the rain; they made trips three leagues long, as far as Vernon, to buy plates and saucepans, which they brought back with pride. Finally, they got everything in order, using one of the upstairs rooms, leaving the other for the mice, and turning the dining room into a studio; and, above all, they were as happy as kids eating their meals in the kitchen at a simple table, near the hearth where the soup simmered in the pot. To help them out, they hired a girl from the village, who came every morning and went home at night. Her name was Mélie, she was a niece of the Faucheurs, and her cluelessness amused them. In fact, you couldn't find a bigger fool in the whole area.
The sun having shown itself again, some delightful days followed, the months slipping away amid monotonous felicity. They never knew the date, they were for ever mixing up the days of the week. Every day, after the second breakfast, came endless strolls, long walks across the tableland planted with apple trees, over the grassy country roads, along the banks of the Seine through the meadows as far as La Roche-Guyon; and there were still more distant explorations, perfect journeys on the opposite side of the river, amid the cornfields of Bonnières and Jeufosse. A person who was obliged to leave the neighbourhood sold them an old boat for thirty francs, so that they also had the river at their disposal, and, like savages, became seized with a passion for it, living on its waters for days together, rowing about, discovering new countries, and lingering for hours under the willows on the banks, or in little creeks, dark with shade. Betwixt the eyots scattered along the stream there was a shifting and mysterious city, a network of passages along which, with the lower branches of the trees caressingly brushing against them, they softly glided, alone, as it were, in the world, with the ringdoves and the kingfishers. He at times had to spring out upon the sand, with bare legs, to push off the skiff. She bravely plied the oars, bent on forcing her way against the strongest currents, and exulting in her strength. And in the evening they ate cabbage soup in the kitchen, laughing at Mélie’s stupidity, as they had laughed at it the day before; to begin the morrow just in the same fashion.
The sun showed itself again, and some lovely days followed, with the months slipping by in happy monotony. They never knew the date and were always mixing up the days of the week. Every day, after their second breakfast, they went for endless strolls and took long walks across the tableland filled with apple trees, along the grassy country roads, and beside the Seine through the meadows all the way to La Roche-Guyon. There were even more distant adventures, perfect outings on the other side of the river, through the cornfields of Bonnières and Jeufosse. Someone who had to leave the area sold them an old boat for thirty francs, giving them access to the river. They, like adventurers, became obsessed with it, spending days on its waters, rowing around, discovering new places, and relaxing for hours under the willows by the banks or in little shaded creeks. Among the islets scattered along the stream was a shifting and mysterious landscape, a maze of paths they glided through, as if they were alone in the world, accompanied only by the ringdoves and kingfishers. Sometimes, he had to jump out onto the sand with bare legs to push the boat off. She bravely rowed, determined to conquer the strongest currents, relishing her strength. And in the evening, they had cabbage soup in the kitchen, laughing at Mélie’s foolishness, just like they had the day before, ready to start the next day in the same way.
Every evening, however, Christine said to Claude:
Every evening, though, Christine said to Claude:
‘Now, my dear, you must promise me one thing—that you’ll set to work to-morrow.’
‘Now, my dear, you have to promise me one thing—that you’ll start working tomorrow.’
‘Yes, to-morrow; I give you my word.’
“Yep, tomorrow; I promise.”
‘And you know if you don’t, I shall really get angry this time. Is it I who prevent you?’
‘And you know if you don’t, I will really get angry this time. Am I the one stopping you?’
‘You! what an idea. Since I came here to work—dash it all! you’ll see to-morrow.’
‘You! What a thought. Ever since I got here to work—damn it all! you’ll see tomorrow.’
On the morrow they started off again in the skiff; she looked at him with an embarrassed smile when she saw that he took neither canvas nor colours. Then she kissed him, laughing, proud of her power, moved by the constant sacrifice he made to her. And then came fresh affectionate remonstrances: ‘To-morrow, ah! to-morrow she would tie him to his easel!’
On the next day, they set off again in the small boat; she gave him an embarrassed smile when she noticed he wasn’t taking any canvas or paints. Then she kissed him, laughing, proud of her influence, touched by the constant sacrifices he made for her. After that, more affectionate protests came: “Tomorrow, oh! Tomorrow she would make him stay at his easel!”
However, Claude did make some attempts at work. He began a study of the slopes of Jeufosse, with the Seine in the foreground; but Christine followed him to the islet where he had installed himself, and sat down on the grass close to him with parted lips, her eyes watching the blue sky. And she looked so pretty there amidst the verdure, in that solitude, where nothing broke the silence but the rippling of the water, that every minute he relinquished his palette to nestle by her side. On another occasion, he was altogether charmed by an old farmhouse, shaded by some antiquated apple trees which had grown to the size of oaks. He came thither two days in succession, but on the third Christine took him to the market at Bonnières to buy some hens. The next day was also lost; the canvas had dried; then he grew impatient in trying to work at it again, and finally abandoned it altogether. Throughout the warm weather he thus made but a pretence to work—barely roughing out little bits of painting, which he laid aside on the first pretext, without an effort at perseverance. His passion for toil, that fever of former days that had made him rise at daybreak to battle with his rebellious art, seemed to have gone; a reaction of indifference and laziness had set in, and he vegetated delightfully, like one who is recovering from some severe illness.
However, Claude did make some attempts at working. He started studying the slopes of Jeufosse, with the Seine in the background. But Christine followed him to the islet where he had set up, sitting on the grass nearby, her lips slightly parted and her eyes gazing at the blue sky. She looked so lovely there among the greenery, in that quiet place where the only sound was the water gently rippling, that he kept putting down his palette to sit by her side. On another occasion, he was completely enchanted by an old farmhouse, shaded by ancient apple trees that had grown as large as oaks. He visited it two days in a row, but on the third day, Christine took him to the market at Bonnières to buy some hens. The next day was also wasted; the paint had dried, and he grew impatient trying to work on it again, ultimately giving up altogether. Throughout the warm weather, he only pretended to work—barely sketching little bits of painting that he abandoned at the first excuse, without any effort to stick with it. His passion for work, that drive from earlier days that had him rising at dawn to tackle his challenging art, seemed to have faded; a wave of indifference and laziness had set in, and he drifted pleasantly, like someone recovering from a serious illness.
But Christine lived indeed. All the latent passion of her nature burst into being. She was indeed an amorosa, a child of nature and of love.
But Christine was truly alive. All the hidden passion within her came to life. She was definitely a lover, a child of nature and love.
Thus their days passed by and solitude did not prove irksome to them. No desire for diversion, of paying or receiving visits, as yet made them look beyond themselves. Such hours as she did not spend near him, she employed in household cares, turning the house upside down with great cleanings, which Mélie executed under her supervision, and falling into fits of reckless activity, which led her to engage in personal combats with the few saucepans in the kitchen. The garden especially occupied her; provided with pruning shears, careless of the thorns which lacerated her hands, she reaped harvests of roses from the giant rose-bushes; and she gave herself a thorough back-ache in gathering the apricots, which she sold for two hundred francs to some of the Englishmen who scoured the district every year. She was very proud of her bargain, and seriously talked of living upon the garden produce. Claude cared less for gardening; he had placed his couch in the large dining-room, transformed into a studio; and he stretched himself upon it, and through the open window watched her sow and plant. There was profound peace, the certainty that nobody would come, that no ring at the bell would disturb them at any moment of the day. Claude carried this fear of coming into contact with people so far as to avoid passing Faucheur’s inn, for he dreaded lest he might run against some party of chums from Paris. Not a soul came, however, throughout the livelong summer. And every night as they went upstairs, he repeated that, after all, it was deuced lucky.
So their days went by, and they didn’t find solitude bothersome. They had no desire for entertainment or for visiting or receiving company that made them look beyond themselves. When she wasn’t near him, she focused on household chores, turning the house upside down with deep cleanings, which Mélie did under her supervision, and getting caught up in bursts of energy that led her to have personal showdowns with the few pots and pans in the kitchen. The garden especially kept her busy; armed with pruning shears and indifferent to the thorns that tore at her hands, she harvested roses from the enormous rose bushes. She also strained her back picking apricots, which she sold for two hundred francs to some of the Englishmen who came through the area every year. She was very proud of her deal and seriously considered living off the garden's bounty. Claude wasn’t as interested in gardening; he had set up his couch in the large dining room, now a studio, and he lounged there, watching her sow and plant through the open window. There was a deep peace, the certainty that no one would come by and that no ring at the bell would interrupt them at any time of the day. Claude was so anxious about encountering others that he even avoided passing Faucheur’s inn, worried he might bump into some friends from Paris. However, not a single person came by throughout the entire summer. And every night as they went upstairs, he would say that, in the end, it was incredibly lucky.
There was, however, a secret sore in the depths of his happiness. After their flight from Paris, Sandoz had learnt their address, and had written to ask whether he might go to see Claude, but the latter had not answered the letter, and so coolness had followed, and the old friendship seemed dead. Christine was grieved at this, for she realised well enough that he had broken off all intercourse with his comrades for her sake. She constantly reverted to the subject; she did not want to estrange him from his friends, and indeed she insisted that he should invite them. But, though he promised to set matters right, he did nothing of the kind. It was all over; what was the use of raking up the past?
There was, however, a hidden pain beneath his happiness. After they escaped from Paris, Sandoz found out their address and wrote to ask if he could visit Claude, but Claude never replied to the letter. This created distance between them, and their old friendship felt dead. Christine was upset by this, as she understood that he had cut ties with his friends for her sake. She often brought it up; she didn’t want to drive him away from his friends and insisted that he should invite them over. But even though he promised to fix things, he didn’t do anything about it. It was all over; what was the point of revisiting the past?
However, money having become scarce towards the latter days of July, he was obliged to go to Paris to sell Papa Malgras half a dozen of his old studies, and Christine, on accompanying him to the station, made him solemnly promise that he would go to see Sandoz. In the evening she was there again, at the Bonnières Station, waiting for him.
However, as money became tight in the last days of July, he had to go to Paris to sell Papa Malgras half a dozen of his old studies. When Christine accompanied him to the station, she made him promise to visit Sandoz. That evening, she was back at Bonnières Station, waiting for him.
‘Well, did you see him? did you embrace each other?’
'So, did you see him? Did you guys hug each other?'
He began walking by her side in silent embarrassment. Then he answered in a husky voice:
He started walking next to her, feeling awkward and quiet. Then he replied in a low voice:
‘No; I hadn’t time.’
'No; I didn't have time.'
Thereupon, sorely distressed, with two big tears welling to her eyes, she replied:
Thereupon, deeply upset, with two large tears welling in her eyes, she replied:
‘You grieve me very much indeed.’
‘You really hurt me a lot.’
Then, as they were walking under the trees, he kissed her, crying also, and begging her not to make him sadder still. ‘Could people alter life? Did it not suffice that they were happy together?’
Then, as they walked under the trees, he kissed her, crying as well, and pleading with her not to make him any sadder. 'Can people really change life? Isn’t it enough that they were happy together?'
During the earlier months they only once met some strangers. This occurred a little above Bennecourt, in the direction of La Roche-Guyon. They were strolling along a deserted, wooded lane, one of those delightful dingle paths of the region, when, at a turning, they came upon three middle-class people out for a walk—father, mother, and daughter. It precisely happened that, believing themselves to be quite alone, Claude and Christine had passed their arms round each other’s waists; she, bending towards him, was offering her lips; while he laughingly protruded his; and their surprise was so sudden that they did not change their attitude, but, still clasped together, advanced at the same slow pace. The amazed family remained transfixed against one of the side banks, the father stout and apoplectic, the mother as thin as a knife-blade, and the daughter, a mere shadow, looking like a sick bird moulting—all three of them ugly, moreover, and but scantily provided with the vitiated blood of their race. They looked disgraceful amidst the throbbing life of nature, beneath the glorious sun. And all at once the sorry girl, who with stupefied eyes thus watched love passing by, was pushed off by her father, dragged along by her mother, both beside themselves, exasperated by the sight of that embrace, and asking whether there was no longer any country police, while, still without hurrying, the lovers went off triumphantly in their glory.
During the earlier months, they only encountered strangers once. This happened a little above Bennecourt, heading toward La Roche-Guyon. They were walking along a deserted, wooded path, one of those lovely dingle trails in the area, when they turned a corner and saw three middle-class people out for a stroll—a father, a mother, and their daughter. At that moment, believing they were completely alone, Claude and Christine had their arms around each other’s waists; she leaned in, offering her lips, while he playfully stuck his out. Their surprise was so sudden that they didn’t change their position, still holding onto each other as they continued to walk at the same slow pace. The astonished family froze against one of the side banks: the father was stout and red-faced, the mother was as thin as a knife blade, and the daughter, a mere shadow, resembled a sick bird shedding its feathers—all three of them unattractive and not well represented by the tainted blood of their lineage. They seemed out of place amid the vibrant life of nature, under the bright sun. Suddenly, the unfortunate girl, who was watching love unfold with wide eyes, was shoved away by her father, who was beside himself, and dragged along by her mother, both furious at the sight of that embrace, questioning whether there was no longer any local police, while the lovers confidently walked away, basking in their moment.
Claude, however, was wondering and searching his memory. Where had he previously seen those heads, so typical of bourgeois degeneracy, those flattened, crabbed faces reeking of millions earned at the expense of the poor? It was assuredly in some important circumstance of his life. And all at once he remembered; they were the Margaillans, the man was that building contractor whom Dubuche had promenaded through the Salon of the Rejected, and who had laughed in front of his picture with the roaring laugh of a fool. A couple of hundred steps further on, as he and Christine emerged from the lane and found themselves in front of a large estate, where a big white building stood, girt with fine trees, they learnt from an old peasant woman that La Richaudière, as it was called, had belonged to the Margaillans for three years past. They had paid fifteen hundred thousand francs for it, and had just spent more than a million in improvements.
Claude, however, was deep in thought, trying to recall something. Where had he seen those faces before, so typical of middle-class decadence, those flattened, twisted features that oozed the wealth earned at the expense of the less fortunate? It had to be during some significant moment in his life. Suddenly, it clicked; they were the Margaillans, the guy was that construction contractor who Dubuche had walked through the Salon of the Rejected, laughing in front of his painting with the foolish roar of a simpleton. A few hundred steps later, as he and Christine emerged from the alley and found themselves in front of a large estate with a big white building surrounded by beautiful trees, they learned from an old peasant woman that La Richaudière, as it was called, had been owned by the Margaillans for three years. They had paid one and a half million francs for it and had just spent over a million on renovations.
‘That part of the country won’t see much of us in future,’ said Claude, as they returned to Bennecourt. ‘Those monsters spoil the landscape.’
‘That part of the country won’t see much of us in the future,’ said Claude, as they headed back to Bennecourt. ‘Those monsters ruin the landscape.’
Towards the end of the summer, an important event changed the current of their lives. Christine was enceinte. At first, both she and Claude felt amazed and worried. Now for the first time they seemed to dread some terrible complications in their life. Later on, however, they gradually grew accustomed to the thought of what lay before them and made all necessary preparations. But the winter proved a terribly inclement one, and Christine was compelled to remain indoors, whilst Claude went walking all alone over the frost-bound, clanking roads. And he, finding himself in solitude during these walks, after months of constant companionship, wondered at the way his life had turned, against his own will, as it were. He had never wished for home life even with her; had he been consulted, he would have expressed his horror of it; it had come about, however, and could not be undone, for—without mentioning the child—he was one of those who lack the courage to break off. This fate had evidently been in store for him, he felt; he had been destined to succumb to the first woman who did not feel ashamed of him. The hard ground resounded beneath his wooden-soled shoes, and the blast froze the current of his reverie, which lingered on vague thoughts, on his luck of having, at any rate, met with a good and honest girl, on how cruelly he would have suffered had it been otherwise. And then his love came back to him; he hurried home to take Christine in his trembling arms as if he had been in danger of losing her.
Towards the end of the summer, a significant event changed the course of their lives. Christine was pregnant. At first, both she and Claude were amazed and anxious. For the first time, they started to fear some serious complications in their life. However, they gradually grew accustomed to the idea of what was coming and made all the necessary preparations. But the winter turned out to be incredibly harsh, and Christine had to stay indoors while Claude wandered alone on the icy, clanging streets. During these solitary walks, after months of being together, he reflected on how his life had changed against his will. He had never wanted a domestic life with her; if given the choice, he would have expressed his distaste for it. Still, it had happened and couldn’t be reversed, for—putting the child aside—he was one of those who lacked the courage to walk away. He felt this fate had always been waiting for him; he had been destined to yield to the first woman who wasn’t ashamed of him. The hard ground echoed under his wooden-soled shoes, and the cold wind disrupted his thoughts, which dwelled on vague reflections about his luck in at least meeting a good and honest girl, and how painfully he would have suffered had it been different. Then his love for her returned; he rushed home to take Christine in his shaking arms, as if he were at risk of losing her.
The child, a boy, was born about the middle of February, and at once began to revolutionise the home, for Christine, who had shown herself such an active housewife, proved to be a very awkward nurse. She failed to become motherly, despite her kind heart and her distress at the sight of the slightest pimple. She soon grew weary, gave in, and called for Mélie, who only made matters worse by her gaping stupidity. The father had to come to the rescue, and proved still more awkward than the two women. The discomfort which needlework had caused Christine of old, her want of aptitude as regards the usual occupations of her sex, revived amid the cares that the baby required. The child was ill-kept, and grew up anyhow in the garden, or in the large rooms left untidy in sheer despair, amidst broken toys, uncleanliness and destruction. And when matters became too bad altogether, Christine could only throw herself upon the neck of the man she loved. She was pre-eminently an amorosa and would have sacrificed her son for his father twenty times over.
The child, a boy, was born around mid-February, and immediately started to change the household dynamics, as Christine, who had been such an efficient homemaker, turned out to be a very clumsy nurse. She struggled to be motherly, despite her kind nature and her distress over even the smallest blemish. She quickly became exhausted, gave up, and called for Mélie, who only made things worse with her cluelessness. The father had to step in, but he was even more awkward than the two women. The discomfort that needlework had once caused Christine, along with her lack of skill when it came to the typical tasks expected of women, resurfaced as she faced the demands of caring for the baby. The child was poorly cared for and grew up all over the place in the garden or in the large rooms that were left messy out of sheer frustration, surrounded by broken toys, dirtiness, and chaos. And when things got really out of hand, Christine could only throw herself into the arms of the man she loved. She was primarily a lover and would have sacrificed her son for his father over and over again.
It was at this period, however, that Claude resumed work a little. The winter was drawing to a close; he did not know how to spend the bright sunny mornings, since Christine could no longer go out before mid-day on account of Jacques, whom they had named thus after his maternal grandfather, though they neglected to have him christened. Claude worked in the garden, at first, in a random way: made a rough sketch of the lines of apricot trees, roughed out the giant rose-bushes, composed some bits of ‘still life,’ out of four apples, a bottle, and a stoneware jar, disposed on a table-napkin. This was only to pass his time. But afterwards he warmed to his work; the idea of painting a figure in the full sunlight ended by haunting him; and from that moment his wife became his victim, she herself agreeable enough, offering herself, feeling happy at affording him pleasure, without as yet understanding what a terrible rival she was giving herself in art. He painted her a score of times, dressed in white, in red, amidst the verdure, standing, walking, or reclining on the grass, wearing a wide-brimmed straw hat, or bare-headed, under a parasol, the cherry-tinted silk of which steeped her features in a pinky glow. He never felt wholly satisfied; he scratched out the canvases after two or three sittings, and at once began them afresh, obstinately sticking to the same subject. Only a few studies, incomplete, but charmingly indicated in a vigorous style, were saved from the palette-knife, and hung against the walls of the dining-room.
It was during this time that Claude started working a bit again. Winter was coming to an end, and he didn't know how to spend the bright, sunny mornings since Christine couldn’t go out before noon because of Jacques, who was named after his maternal grandfather, though they hadn't gotten him baptized. At first, Claude worked in the garden somewhat aimlessly: he made a rough sketch of the lines of apricot trees, sketched the giant rose bushes, and put together some still-life pieces with four apples, a bottle, and a stoneware jar arranged on a table napkin. He did this just to keep himself occupied. But soon he got more into it; the idea of painting a figure in full sunlight began to consume him, and from that point on, his wife became his model. She was happy to help, feeling good about bringing him joy, without realizing what a fierce competitor she was becoming in his art. He painted her dozens of times, dressed in white, in red, surrounded by greenery—standing, walking, or reclining on the grass, wearing a wide-brimmed straw hat, or bare-headed under a cherry-tinted silk parasol that cast a pink glow on her face. He never felt completely satisfied; he would scrape off the canvases after two or three sittings and start them over, stubbornly sticking to the same subject. Only a few studies, unfinished but beautifully rendered in a bold style, were saved from the palette knife and were hung on the walls of the dining room.
And after Christine it became Jacques’ turn to pose. They stripped him to the skin, like a little St. John the Baptist, on warm days, and stretched him on a blanket, where he was told not to stir. But devil a bit could they make him keep still. Getting frisky, in the sunlight, he crowed and kicked with his tiny pink feet in the air, rolling about and turning somersaults. The father, after laughing, became angry, and swore at the tiresome mite, who would not keep quiet for a minute. Who ever heard of trifling with painting? Then the mother made big eyes at the little one, and held him while the painter quickly sketched an arm or a leg. Claude obstinately kept at it for weeks, tempted as he felt by the pretty tones of that childish skin. It was not as a father, but as an artist, that he gloated over the boy as the subject for a masterpiece, blinking his eyes the while, and dreaming of some wonderful picture he would paint. And he renewed the experiment again and again, watching the lad for days, and feeling furious when the little scamp would not go to sleep at times when he, Claude, might so well have painted him.
And after Christine, it was Jacques’ turn to pose. They stripped him down to his bare skin, like a little St. John the Baptist on warm days, and laid him on a blanket, telling him not to move. But there was no way they could make him stay still. Getting playful in the sunlight, he giggled and kicked his tiny pink feet in the air, rolling around and doing somersaults. The father, after laughing, grew frustrated and yelled at the annoying little guy, who wouldn’t be quiet for even a minute. Who ever heard of messing around during a painting session? Then the mother gave the little one a stern look and held him still while the painter quickly sketched an arm or a leg. Claude stubbornly kept at it for weeks, tempted by the beautiful colors of that youthful skin. It was not as a father, but as an artist, that he reveled in the boy as the subject for a masterpiece, squinting his eyes while dreaming of the amazing picture he would create. He kept trying again and again, observing the lad for days, feeling furious when the little rascal wouldn’t fall asleep at times when he, Claude, could have easily painted him.
One day, when Jacques was sobbing, refusing to keep still, Christine gently remarked:
One day, when Jacques was crying and wouldn’t calm down, Christine softly said:
‘My dear, you tire the poor pet.’
‘My dear, you’re exhausting the poor pet.’
At this Claude burst forth, full of remorse:
At this, Claude erupted, filled with regret:
‘After all! you are right; I’m a fool with this painting of mine. Children are not intended for that sort of thing.’
‘After all! You’re right; I’m a fool for this painting of mine. Kids aren't meant for that kind of thing.’
The spring and summer sped by amidst great quietude. They went out less often; they had almost given up the boat, which finished rotting against the bank, for it was quite a job to take the little one with them among the islets. But they often strolled along the banks of the Seine, without, however, going farther afield than a thousand yards or so. Claude, tired of the everlasting views in the garden, now attempted some sketches by the river-side, and on such days Christine went to fetch him with the child, sitting down to watch him paint, until they all three returned home with flagging steps, beneath the ashen dusk of waning daylight. One afternoon Claude was surprised to see Christine bring with her the old album which she had used as a young girl. She joked about it, and explained that to sit behind him like that had roused in her a wish to work herself. Her voice was a little unsteady as she spoke; the truth was that she felt a longing to share his labour, since this labour took him away from her more and more each day. She drew and ventured to wash in two or three water-colours in the careful style of a school-girl. Then, discouraged by his smiles, feeling that no community of ideas would be arrived at on that ground, she once more put her album aside, making him promise to give her some lessons in painting whenever he should have time.
The spring and summer flew by in a peaceful haze. They went out less often; they had almost stopped using the boat, which was rotting by the bank since it was a hassle to take the little one with them among the islets. But they often strolled along the banks of the Seine, not venturing more than a thousand yards or so. Claude, tired of the same views in the garden, started making some sketches by the riverside. On those days, Christine would come to get him with the child, sitting down to watch him paint until the three of them returned home with tired steps, under the gray dusk of fading daylight. One afternoon, Claude was surprised to see Christine bring the old album she had used as a girl. She joked about it and said that sitting behind him made her want to try creating art herself. Her voice was a little shaky as she spoke; the truth was that she longed to share his work since it was pulling him away from her more each day. She drew and tried to add a couple of watercolors in the careful style of a schoolgirl. Then, feeling discouraged by his smiles and sensing that they wouldn't connect on that level, she set her album aside again, making him promise to give her some painting lessons whenever he had the time.
Besides, she thought his more recent pictures very pretty. After that year of rest in the open country, in the full sunlight, he painted with fresh and clearer vision, as it were, with a more harmonious and brighter colouring. He had never before been able to treat reflections so skilfully, or possessed a more correct perception of men and things steeped in diffuse light. And henceforth, won over by that feast of colours, she would have declared it all capital if he would only have condescended to finish his work a little more, and if she had not remained nonplussed now and then before a mauve ground or a blue tree, which upset all her preconceived notions of colour. One day when she ventured upon a bit of criticism, precisely about an azure-tinted poplar, he made her go to nature and note for herself the delicate bluishness of the foliage. It was true enough, the tree was blue; but in her inmost heart she did not surrender, and condemned reality; there ought not to be any blue trees in nature.
Besides, she thought his more recent paintings were very pretty. After that year of resting in the countryside, in the bright sunlight, he painted with a fresh and clearer perspective, as if he had a more harmonious and vibrant palette. He had never been able to capture reflections as skillfully, nor did he have a more accurate perception of people and things bathed in diffuse light. From then on, enchanted by that explosion of colors, she would have declared it all fantastic if he would just take a little more time to finish his work, and if she hadn’t occasionally found herself baffled by a mauve background or a blue tree, which challenged all her previous ideas about color. One day when she dared to offer some criticism, specifically about an azure-colored poplar, he took her outside to see for herself the delicate bluishness of the leaves. It was true, the tree was blue; but deep down, she couldn’t give in, and rejected reality; there shouldn’t be any blue trees in nature.
She no longer spoke but gravely of the studies hanging in the dining-room. Art was returning into their lives, and it made her muse. When she saw him go off with his bag, his portable easel, and his sunshade, it often happened that she flung herself upon his neck, asking:
She no longer spoke except seriously about the artwork displayed in the dining room. Art was returning to their lives, and it inspired her. When she saw him leave with his bag, portable easel, and sunshade, she often found herself throwing her arms around him, asking:
‘You love me, say?’
"Do you love me?"
‘How silly you are! Why shouldn’t I love you?’
‘How silly you are! Why shouldn’t I love you?’
‘Then kiss me, since you love me, kiss me a great deal, a great deal.’
‘Then kiss me, since you love me, kiss me a lot, a lot.’
Then accompanying him as far as the road, she added:
Then, as she walked with him to the road, she added:
‘And mind you work; you know that I have never prevented you from working. Go, go; I am very pleased when you work.’
‘And make sure to work; you know I’ve never stopped you from working. Go on, go; I’m really happy when you work.’
Anxiety seemed to seize hold of Claude, when the autumn of the second year tinged the leaves yellow, and ushered in the cold weather. The season happened to be abominable; a fortnight of pouring rain kept him idle at home; and then fog came at every moment, hindering his work. He sat in front of the fire, out of sorts; he never spoke of Paris, but the city rose up over yonder, on the horizon, the winter city, with its gaslamps flaring already at five o’clock, its gatherings of friends, spurring each other on to emulation, and its life of ardent production, which even the frosts of December could not slacken. He went there thrice in one month, on the pretext of seeing Malgras, to whom he had, again, sold a few small pictures. He no longer avoided passing in front of Faucheur’s inn; he even allowed himself to be waylaid at times by old Porrette, and to accept a glass of white wine at the inn, and his glance scoured the room as if, despite the season, he had been looking for some comrades of yore, who had arrived there, perchance, that morning. He lingered as if awaiting them; then, in despair at his solitude, he returned home, stifling with all that was fermenting within him, ill at having nobody to whom he might shout the thoughts which made his brain almost burst.
Anxiety gripped Claude as autumn of the second year turned the leaves yellow and brought in the cold weather. The season was terrible; a fortnight of nonstop rain kept him stuck at home, and fog rolled in constantly, making it hard to work. He sat by the fire, feeling out of sorts; he never mentioned Paris, but the city loomed on the horizon, the winter city, with its gas lamps flickering at five o’clock, its gatherings of friends pushing each other to succeed, and its vibrant life, which even December's frost couldn’t slow down. He went there three times in one month, claiming he was visiting Malgras, to whom he had sold a few small paintings again. He no longer avoided passing by Faucheur’s inn; he even let old Porrette catch him at times, accepting a glass of white wine at the inn, while his eyes scanned the room as if, despite the season, he were searching for long-lost friends who might have arrived that morning. He lingered as if waiting for them; then, feeling hopelessly alone, he headed home, overwhelmed by everything bubbling inside him, frustrated at having no one to share the thoughts that made his head feel ready to explode.
However, the winter went by, and Claude had the consolation of being able to paint some lovely snow scenes. A third year was beginning, when, towards the close of May, an unexpected meeting filled him with emotion. He had that morning climbed up to the plateau to find a subject, having at last grown tired of the banks of the Seine; and at the bend of a road he stopped short in amazement on seeing Dubuche, in a silk hat, and carefully-buttoned frock coat, coming towards him, between the double row of elder hedges.
However, winter passed, and Claude found comfort in painting some beautiful snow scenes. As a third year was starting, an unexpected meeting in late May filled him with emotion. That morning, he had hiked up to the plateau to look for a subject, having finally grown tired of the banks of the Seine; and at a bend in the road, he halted in shock upon seeing Dubuche, wearing a silk hat and a neatly buttoned frock coat, walking towards him between the double row of elder hedges.
‘What! is it you?’
"What! Is that you?"
The architect stammered from sheer vexation:
The architect stuttered out of frustration:
‘Yes, I am going to pay a visit. It’s confoundedly idiotic in the country, eh? But it can’t be helped. There are certain things one’s obliged to do. And you live near here, eh? I knew—that is to say, I didn’t. I had been told something about it, but I thought it was on the opposite side, farther down.’
‘Yes, I’m going to drop by. It’s ridiculously stupid in the country, right? But it can’t be avoided. There are some things you just have to do. And you live close by, right? I knew—well, not really. I’d heard something about it, but I thought it was on the other side, farther down.’
Claude, very much moved at seeing him, helped him out of his difficulty.
Claude, feeling very emotional upon seeing him, assisted him in overcoming his difficulty.
‘All right, all right, old man, there is no need to apologise. I am the most guilty party. Ah! it’s a long while since we saw one another! If you knew what a thump my heart gave when I saw your nose appear from behind the leaves!’
‘Okay, okay, old man, you don’t need to apologize. I’m the most at fault here. Ah! It’s been a long time since we last saw each other! If you only knew how fast my heart raced when I saw your face peek out from behind the leaves!’
Then he took his arm and accompanied him, giggling with pleasure, while the other, in his constant worry about his future, which always made him talk about himself, at once began speaking of his prospects. He had just become a first-class pupil at the School, after securing the regulation ‘honourable mentions,’ with infinite trouble. But his success left him as perplexed as ever. His parents no longer sent him a penny, they wailed about their poverty so much that he might have to support them in his turn. He had given up the idea of competing for the Prix de Rome, feeling certain of being beaten in the effort, and anxious to earn his living. And he was weary already; sick at scouring the town, at earning twenty-five sous an hour from ignorant architects, who treated him like a hodman. What course should he adopt? How was he to guess at the shortest route? He might leave the School; he would get a lift from his master, the influential Dequersonnière, who liked him for his docility and diligence; only what a deal of trouble and uncertainty there would still be before him! And he bitterly complained of the Government schools, where one slaved away for years, and which did not even provide a position for all those whom they cast upon the pavement.
Then he took his arm and walked with him, giggling with delight, while the other, constantly worried about his future, which always led him to talk about himself, immediately started discussing his prospects. He had just become a top student at the School after achieving the required 'honorable mentions,' with a lot of effort. But his success left him as confused as ever. His parents stopped sending him any money, complaining about their poverty so much that he might end up having to support them. He had given up on competing for the Prix de Rome, convinced he would lose and eager to earn a living. He was already exhausted; tired of running around the city, making twenty-five sous an hour from clueless architects who treated him like a laborer. What should he do? How could he figure out the quickest path? He could leave the School; he would get a boost from his master, the influential Dequersonnière, who liked him for his obedience and hard work; but there would still be so much trouble and uncertainty ahead! And he bitterly complained about the government schools, where students toiled for years, yet they didn’t even guarantee jobs for all those they turned out into the streets.
Suddenly he stopped in the middle of the path. The elder hedges were leading to an open plain, and La Richaudière appeared amid its lofty trees.
Suddenly he stopped in the middle of the path. The older hedges were leading to an open field, and La Richaudière appeared among its tall trees.
‘Hold hard! of course,’ exclaimed Claude, ‘I hadn’t thought about it—you’re going to that shanty. Oh! the baboons; there’s a lot of ugly mugs, if you like!’
‘Wait! Of course,’ exclaimed Claude, ‘I hadn’t thought about it—you’re going to that place. Oh! the baboons; there are a lot of ugly faces, if that’s what you like!’
Dubuche, looking vexed at this outburst of artistic feeling, protested stiffly. ‘All the same, Papa Margaillan, idiot as he seems to you, is a first-rate man of business. You should see him in his building-yards, among the houses he runs up, as active as the very fiend, showing marvellous good management, and a wonderful scent as to the right streets to build and what materials to buy! Besides, one does not earn millions without becoming a gentleman. And then, too, it would be very silly of me not to be polite to a man who can be useful to me.’
Dubuche, looking annoyed at this outburst of artistic emotion, protested stiffly. "Still, Papa Margaillan, as much of an idiot as he seems to you, is a top-notch businessman. You should see him at his construction sites, among the houses he builds, as active as the devil, showing incredible management skills and a great instinct for the right streets to develop and which materials to purchase! Plus, you don't earn millions without becoming a decent person. And honestly, it would be foolish of me not to be polite to someone who could be helpful to me."
While talking, he barred the narrow path, preventing his friend from advancing further—no doubt from a fear of being compromised by being seen in his company, and in order to make him understand that they ought to separate there.
While talking, he blocked the narrow path, stopping his friend from moving forward—probably out of fear of being seen with him and wanting to make it clear that they should part ways there.
Claude was on the point of inquiring about their comrades in Paris, but he kept silent. Not even a word was said respecting Christine, and he was reluctantly deciding to quit Dubuche, holding out his hand to take leave, when, in spite of himself, this question fell from his quivering lips:
Claude was about to ask about their friends in Paris, but he held back. Not a single word was mentioned about Christine, and he was hesitantly deciding to leave Dubuche, extending his hand to say goodbye, when, despite himself, this question slipped from his trembling lips:
‘And is Sandoz all right?’
"Is Sandoz okay?"
‘Yes, he’s pretty well. I seldom see him. He spoke to me about you last month. He is still grieved at your having shown us the door.’
‘Yes, he’s doing pretty well. I rarely see him. He mentioned you last month. He’s still upset about you kicking us out.’
‘But I didn’t show you the door,’ exclaimed Claude, beside himself. ‘Come and see me, I beg of you. I shall be so glad!’
‘But I didn’t show you the door,’ Claude exclaimed, feeling frantic. ‘Please come and see me. I would be so happy!’
‘All right, then, we’ll come. I’ll tell him to come, I give you my word—good-bye, old man, good-bye; I’m in a hurry.’
‘Sure, we'll come. I'll tell him to join us, I promise you—goodbye, old man, goodbye; I'm in a hurry.’
And Dubuche went off towards La Richaudière, whilst Claude watched his figure dwindle as he crossed the cultivated plain, until nothing remained but the shiny silk of his hat and the black spot of his coat. The young man returned home slowly, his heart bursting with nameless sadness. However, he said nothing about this meeting to Christine.
And Dubuche headed off toward La Richaudière, while Claude watched him shrink in the distance as he crossed the cultivated field, until all that was left was the shiny silk of his hat and the dark spot of his coat. The young man made his way home slowly, his heart heavy with an indescribable sadness. However, he said nothing about this encounter to Christine.
A week later she had gone to Faucheur’s to buy a pound of vermicelli, and was lingering on her way back, gossiping with a neighbour, with her child on her arm, when a gentleman who alighted from the ferry-boat approached and asked her:
A week later, she went to Faucheur’s to buy a pound of vermicelli and was taking her time on the way back, chatting with a neighbor, with her child in her arms, when a gentleman who got off the ferry approached and asked her:
‘Does not Monsieur Claude Lantier live near here?’
‘Doesn't Monsieur Claude Lantier live around here?’
She was taken aback, and simply answered:
She was surprised and just replied:
‘Yes, monsieur; if you’ll kindly follow me—’
‘Yes, sir; if you would please follow me—’
They walked on side by side for about a hundred yards. The stranger, who seemed to know her, had glanced at her with a good-natured smile; but as she hurried on, trying to hide her embarrassment by looking very grave, he remained silent. She opened the door and showed the visitor into the studio, exclaiming:
They walked side by side for about a hundred yards. The stranger, who seemed to know her, glanced at her with a friendly smile; but as she hurried on, trying to hide her embarrassment by looking serious, he stayed silent. She opened the door and led the visitor into the studio, exclaiming:
‘Claude, here is somebody for you.’
“Claude, I’ve got someone for you.”
Then a loud cry rang out; the two men were already in each other’s arms.
Then a loud shout echoed; the two men were already in each other’s embrace.
‘Oh, my good old Pierre! how kind of you to come! And Dubuche?’
‘Oh, my dear old Pierre! It’s so nice of you to come! And how about Dubuche?’
‘He was prevented at the last moment by some business, and he sent me a telegram to go without him.’
‘He was held up at the last minute by some work, and he sent me a message to go without him.’
‘All right, I half expected it; but you are here. By the thunder of heaven, I am glad!’
'Okay, I kind of saw this coming; but you’re here. By the heavens, I’m so glad!'
And, turning towards Christine, who was smiling, sharing their delight:
And, turning towards Christine, who was smiling and sharing in their joy:
‘It’s true, I didn’t tell you. But the other day I met Dubuche, who was going up yonder, to the place where those monsters live—’
‘It’s true, I didn’t tell you. But the other day I met Dubuche, who was going up there, to the place where those monsters live—’
But he stopped short again, and then with a wild gesture shouted:
But he suddenly stopped again, and then with a frantic gesture yelled:
‘I’m losing my wits, upon my word. You have never spoken to each other, and I leave you there like that. My dear, you see this gentleman? He’s my old chum, Pierre Sandoz, whom I love like a brother. And you, my boy; let me introduce my wife. And you have got to give each other a kiss.’
‘I’m losing my mind, I swear. You two have never talked to each other, and I’m just leaving you like this. My dear, do you see this guy? He’s my old friend, Pierre Sandoz, whom I love like a brother. And you, my boy; let me introduce my wife. And you both need to give each other a kiss.’
Christine began to laugh outright, and tendered her cheek heartily. Sandoz had pleased her at once with his good-natured air, his sound friendship, the fatherly sympathy with which he looked at her. Tears of emotion came to her eyes as he kept both her hands in his, saying:
Christine burst into laughter and offered her cheek warmly. Sandoz immediately won her over with his friendly demeanor, his genuine friendship, and the fatherly affection in his gaze. Tears of emotion filled her eyes as he held both her hands, saying:
‘It is very good of you to love Claude, and you must love each other always, for love is, after all, the best thing in life.’
‘It’s really kind of you to love Claude, and you should always love each other, because love is, after all, the best thing in life.’
Then, bending to kiss the little one, whom she had on her arm, he added: ‘So there’s one already!’
Then, bending down to kiss the little one in her arms, he added: ‘So there’s one already!’
While Christine, preparing lunch, turned the house up-side down, Claude retained Sandoz in the studio. In a few words he told him the whole of the story, who she was, how they had met each other, and what had led them to start housekeeping together, and he seemed to be surprised when his friend asked him why they did not get married. In faith, why? Because they had never even spoken about it, because they would certainly be neither more nor less happy; in short it was a matter of no consequence whatever.
While Christine was making lunch and turning the house upside down, Claude kept Sandoz in the studio. He briefly told him the whole story: who she was, how they met, and what led them to live together. He seemed surprised when his friend asked why they didn't get married. Honestly, why? They had never even talked about it; it wouldn’t change their happiness at all. In short, it was completely irrelevant.
‘Well,’ said the other, ‘it makes no difference to me; but, if she was a good and honest girl when she came to you, you ought to marry her.’
‘Well,’ said the other, ‘it doesn’t matter to me; but if she was a good and honest girl when she came to you, you should marry her.’
‘Why, I’ll marry her whenever she likes, old man. Surely I don’t mean to leave her in the lurch!’
‘Why, I’ll marry her whenever she wants, old man. There's no way I’m leaving her hanging!’
Sandoz then began to marvel at the studies hanging on the walls. Ha, the scamp had turned his time to good account! What accuracy of colouring! What a dash of real sunlight! And Claude, who listened to him, delighted, and laughing proudly, was just going to question him about the comrades in Paris, about what they were all doing, when Christine reappeared, exclaiming: ‘Make haste, the eggs are on the table.’
Sandoz then started to admire the paintings on the walls. Wow, the little rascal had made good use of his time! What precision in the colors! What a touch of real sunlight! And Claude, who was listening to him, thrilled and laughing proudly, was just about to ask him about their friends in Paris and what everyone was up to when Christine came back, shouting, "Hurry up, the eggs are on the table."
They lunched in the kitchen, and an extraordinary lunch it was; a dish of fried gudgeons after the boiled eggs; then the beef from the soup of the night before, arranged in salad fashion, with potatoes, and a red herring. It was delicious; there was the pungent and appetising smell of the herring which Mélie had upset on the live embers, and the song of the coffee, as it passed, drop by drop, into the pot standing on the range; and when the dessert appeared—some strawberries just gathered, and a cream cheese from a neighbour’s dairy—they gossiped and gossiped with their elbows squarely set on the table. In Paris? Well, to tell the truth, the comrades were doing nothing very original in Paris. And yet they were fighting their way, jostling each other in order to get first to the front. Of course, the absent ones missed their chance; it was as well to be there if one did not want to be altogether forgotten. But was not talent always talent? Wasn’t a man always certain to get on with strength and will? Ah! yes, it was a splendid dream to live in the country, to accumulate masterpieces, and then, one day, to crush Paris by simply opening one’s trunks.
They had lunch in the kitchen, and it was quite an extraordinary meal; first, there was a dish of fried gudgeons after the boiled eggs; then came the beef from the soup the night before, serving it up in a salad style, with potatoes and a red herring. It was delicious; the strong and appetizing smell of the herring that Mélie had knocked onto the hot coals filled the air, and the coffee brewed slowly, drop by drop, into the pot on the stove; when dessert came out—fresh strawberries and a cream cheese from a neighbor’s dairy—they chatted away with their elbows firmly on the table. In Paris? Honestly, the friends weren’t doing anything especially original in Paris. Still, they were all trying to push their way forward, nudging each other to get to the front first. Of course, those who weren’t there missed out; it was better to be present if one didn’t want to be completely forgotten. But wasn’t talent always talent? Wasn’t a person always likely to succeed with determination and drive? Ah! yes, it was a wonderful dream to live in the countryside, to gather masterpieces, and then one day, to impress Paris just by opening one’s trunks.
In the evening, when Claude accompanied Sandoz to the station, the latter said to him:
In the evening, when Claude walked Sandoz to the station, Sandoz said to him:
‘That reminds me, I wanted to tell you something. I think I am going to get married.’
‘That reminds me, I wanted to tell you something. I think I’m going to get married.’
The painter burst out laughing.
The artist burst out laughing.
‘Ah, you wag, now I understand why you gave me a lecture this morning.’
‘Oh, you jokester, now I get why you lectured me this morning.’
While waiting for the train to arrive, they went on chatting. Sandoz explained his ideas on marriage, which, in middle-class fashion, he considered an indispensable condition for good work, substantial orderly labour, among great modern producers. The theory of woman being a destructive creature—one who killed an artist, pounded his heart, and fed upon his brain—was a romantic idea against which facts protested. Besides, as for himself, he needed an affection that would prove the guardian of his tranquillity, a loving home, where he might shut himself up, so as to devote his whole life to the huge work which he ever dreamt of. And he added that everything depended upon a man’s choice—that he believed he had found what he had been looking for, an orphan, the daughter of petty tradespeople, without a penny, but handsome and intelligent. For the last six months, after resigning his clerkship, he had embraced journalism, by which he gained a larger income. He had just moved his mother to a small house at Batignolles, where the three would live together—two women to love him, and he strong enough to provide for the household.
While waiting for the train to arrive, they kept chatting. Sandoz shared his thoughts on marriage, which he viewed, in a middle-class way, as essential for achieving good work and solid, orderly labor among successful modern producers. The idea that women are destructive—killing an artist, breaking his heart, and feeding on his intellect—was a romantic notion that facts challenged. Besides, for himself, he needed a love that would protect his peace, a cozy home where he could retreat to devote his entire life to the grand project he always dreamed about. He added that everything hinged on a man’s choice—he believed he had found what he was looking for: an orphan, the daughter of small-time merchants, without a cent to her name, but beautiful and smart. For the past six months, after quitting his clerical job, he had taken up journalism, earning a better income. He had just moved his mother to a small house in Batignolles, where the three of them would live together—two women to love him, and he strong enough to support the household.
‘Get married, old man,’ said Claude. ‘One should act according to one’s feelings. And good-bye, for here’s your train. Don’t forget your promise to come and see us again.’
‘Get married, old man,’ Claude said. ‘You should follow your heart. And goodbye, because here comes your train. Don’t forget your promise to visit us again.’
Sandoz returned very often. He dropped in at odd times whenever his newspaper work allowed him, for he was still free, as he was not to be married till the autumn. Those were happy days, whole afternoons of mutual confidences when all their old determination to secure fame revived.
Sandoz visited frequently. He stopped by at random times whenever his newspaper job permitted, since he was still single and wouldn’t be getting married until autumn. Those were joyful days, filled with long afternoons of sharing secrets when their old ambition to achieve fame came back to life.
One day, while Sandoz was alone with Claude on an island of the Seine, both of them lying there with their eyes fixed on the sky, he told the painter of his vast ambition, confessed himself aloud.
One day, while Sandoz was alone with Claude on an island in the Seine, both of them lying there with their eyes on the sky, he shared his big dreams with the painter and openly confessed them.
‘Journalism, let me tell you, is only a battle-ground. A man must live, and he has to fight to do so. Then, again, that wanton, the Press, despite the unpleasant phases of the profession, is after all a tremendous power, a resistless weapon in the hands of a fellow with convictions. But if I am obliged to avail myself of journalism, I don’t mean to grow grey in it! Oh, dear no! And, besides, I’ve found what I wanted, a machine that’ll crush one with work, something I’m going to plunge into, perhaps never to come out of it.’
‘Journalism, let me tell you, is just a battleground. A person has to live, and they need to fight for that. Also, that wild thing, the Press, despite the tough parts of the job, is ultimately a huge force, an unstoppable weapon in the hands of someone with strong beliefs. But if I have to use journalism, I certainly don’t plan to grow old in it! Oh, no way! And besides, I’ve found what I was looking for, a machine that’ll bury you in work, something I’m going to dive into, maybe never to resurface.’
Silence reigned amid the foliage, motionless in the dense heat. He resumed speaking more slowly and in jerky phrases:
Silence filled the air among the leaves, still in the sweltering heat. He started to speak again, but more slowly and in choppy sentences:
‘To study man as he is, not man the metaphysical puppet but physiological man, whose nature is determined by his surroundings, and to show all his organism in full play. That’s my idea! Is it not farcical that some should constantly and exclusively study the functions of the brain on the pretext that the brain alone is the noble part of our organism? Thought, thought, confound it all! thought is the product of the whole body. Let them try to make a brain think by itself alone; see what becomes of the nobleness of the brain when the stomach is ailing! No, no, it’s idiotic; there is no philosophy nor science in it! We are positivists, evolutionists, and yet we are to stick to the literary lay-figures of classic times, and continue disentangling the tangled locks of pure reason! He who says psychologist says traitor to truth. Besides, psychology, physiology, it all signifies nothing. The one has become blended with the other, and both are but one nowadays, the mechanism of man leading to the sum total of his functions. Ah, the formula is there, our modern revolution has no other basis; it means the certain death of old society, the birth of a new one, and necessarily the upspringing of a new art in a new soil. Yes, people will see what literature will sprout forth for the coming century of science and democracy.’
"To study humans as they are, not as philosophical puppets but as biological beings shaped by their environment, and to show all aspects of their being in action. That’s my idea! Isn’t it ridiculous that some people focus solely on the brain's functions while claiming the brain is the only noble part of our existence? Thought, thought, damn it all! Thought is the result of the whole body working together. Let them try to get a brain to think on its own; watch how the so-called nobility of the brain disappears when the stomach is upset! No, no, it’s absurd; there’s no philosophy or science in that! We are positivists and evolutionists, yet we cling to the literary stereotypes of classical times and keep trying to untangle the confusing strands of pure reason! Anyone who calls themselves a psychologist is betraying the truth. Besides, psychology and physiology have become interchangeable; they are essentially one today, as the workings of the human body lead to the totality of its functions. Ah, the formula is there; our modern revolution has no other foundation—it signifies the undeniable end of old society, the birth of a new one, and inevitably the rise of a new art in fresh ground. Yes, people will see what kind of literature emerges in the upcoming century of science and democracy."
His cry uprose and was lost in the immense vault of heaven. Not a breath stirred; there was nought but the silent ripple of the river past the willows. And Sandoz turned abruptly towards his companion, and said to him, face to face:
His shout rose up and vanished into the vast sky. Not a whisper stirred; all that could be heard was the quiet flow of the river past the willows. And Sandoz suddenly turned to his friend and said to him, face to face:
‘So I have found what I wanted for myself. Oh, it isn’t much, a little corner of study only, but one that should be sufficient for a man’s life, even when his ambition is over-vast. I am going to take a family, and I shall study its members, one by one, whence they come, whither they go, how they re-act one upon another—in short, I shall have mankind in a small compass, the way in which mankind grows and behaves. On the other hand, I shall set my men and women in some given period of history, which will provide me with the necessary surroundings and circumstances,—you understand, eh? a series of books, fifteen, twenty books, episodes that will cling together, although each will have a separate framework, a series of novels with which I shall be able to build myself a house for my old days, if they don’t crush me!’
‘So I’ve found what I wanted for myself. Oh, it isn’t much, just a little study corner, but it should be enough for a person's life, even when their ambitions are too big. I’m going to start a family, and I’ll study its members, one by one—where they come from, where they’re going, how they interact with each other—in short, I’ll have a small representation of humanity, the way people grow and behave. On the other hand, I’ll place my characters in a specific period of history, which will give me the right settings and circumstances—you see what I mean, right? A series of books, fifteen, twenty books, stories that connect but each will have its own structure, a series of novels with which I can create a life for my later years, if they don’t overwhelm me!’
He fell on his back again, spread out his arms on the grass, as if he wanted to sink into the earth, laughing and joking all the while.
He fell back onto the grass again, spread his arms out as if he wanted to sink into the earth, laughing and joking the whole time.
‘Oh, beneficent earth, take me unto thee, thou who art our common mother, our only source of life! thou the eternal, the immortal one, in whom circulates the soul of the world, the sap that spreads even into the stones, and makes the trees themselves our big, motionless brothers! Yes, I wish to lose myself in thee; it is thou that I feel beneath my limbs, clasping and inflaming me; thou alone shalt appear in my work as the primary force, the means and the end, the immense ark in which everything becomes animated with the breath of every being!’
‘Oh, nurturing earth, embrace me, you who are our shared mother, our only source of life! You are the eternal, the immortal one, in whom flows the soul of the world, the energy that even seeps into the stones and makes the trees our great, still brothers! Yes, I want to lose myself in you; it is you that I feel beneath my limbs, holding and igniting me; only you will show up in my work as the primary force, the means and the end, the vast vessel in which everything becomes alive with the breath of every being!’
Though begun as mere pleasantry, with all the bombast of lyrical emphasis, the invocation terminated in a cry of ardent conviction, quivering with profound poetical emotion, and Sandoz’s eyes grew moist; and, to hide how much he felt moved, he added, roughly, with a sweeping gesture that took in the whole scene around:
Though it started as just a friendly gesture, full of dramatic flair, the invocation ended in a passionate plea, shaking with deep poetic feeling, and Sandoz’s eyes became teary; and to cover how deeply he was affected, he added, gruffly, with a sweeping motion that encompassed everything around:
‘How idiotic it is! a soul for every one of us, when there is that big soul there!’
‘How silly it is! One soul for each of us, when there’s that huge soul out there!’
Claude, who had disappeared amid the grass, had not stirred. After a fresh spell of silence he summed up everything:
Claude, who had vanished into the grass, hadn't moved. After another moment of silence, he took everything in:
‘That’s it, old boy! Run them through, all of them. Only you’ll get trounced.’
‘That’s it, buddy! Take them all on. Just know you’re going to get crushed.’
‘Oh,’ said Sandoz, rising up and stretching himself, ‘my bones are too hard. They’ll smash their own wrists. Let’s go back; I don’t want to miss the train.’
‘Oh,’ said Sandoz, getting up and stretching, ‘my bones are too stiff. They’ll break their own wrists. Let’s head back; I don’t want to miss the train.’
Christine had taken a great liking to him, seeing him so robust and upright in his doings, and she plucked up courage at last to ask a favour of him: that of standing godfather to Jacques. True, she never set foot in church now, but why shouldn’t the lad be treated according to custom? What influenced her above all was the idea of giving the boy a protector in this godfather, whom she found so serious and sensible, even amidst the exuberance of his strength. Claude expressed surprise, but gave his consent with a shrug of the shoulders. And the christening took place; they found a godmother, the daughter of a neighbour, and they made a feast of it, eating a lobster, which was brought from Paris.
Christine had taken a liking to him, appreciating how strong and upright he was in everything he did. Eventually, she gathered the courage to ask him for a favor: to be Jacques's godfather. True, she hadn't stepped foot in a church in a while, but why shouldn't the boy be treated according to tradition? What influenced her most was the thought of giving the boy a protector in this godfather, who she found to be serious and sensible, even amid his strength. Claude was surprised but shrugged and agreed. The christening happened; they found a godmother, the daughter of a neighbor, and held a feast, enjoying a lobster that had been brought from Paris.
That very day, as they were saying good-bye, Christine took Sandoz aside, and said, in an imploring voice:
That same day, as they were saying their goodbyes, Christine pulled Sandoz aside and said, in a pleading voice:
‘Do come again soon, won’t you? He is bored.’
‘Please come back soon, okay? He’s bored.’
In fact, Claude had fits of profound melancholy. He abandoned his work, went out alone, and prowled in spite of himself about Faucheur’s inn, at the spot where the ferry-boat landed its passengers, as if ever expecting to see all Paris come ashore there. He had Paris on the brain; he went there every month and returned desolate, unable to work. Autumn came, then winter, a very wet and muddy winter, and he spent it in a state of morose torpidity, bitter even against Sandoz, who, having married in October, could no longer come to Bennecourt so often. Claude only seemed to wake up at each of the other’s visits; deriving a week’s excitement from them, and never ceasing to comment feverishly about the news brought from yonder. He, who formerly had hidden his regret of Paris, nowadays bewildered Christine with the way in which he chatted to her from morn till night about things she was quite ignorant of, and people she had never seen. When Jacques fell asleep, there were endless comments between the parents as they sat by the fireside. Claude grew passionate, and Christine had to give her opinion and to pronounce judgment on all sorts of matters.
In fact, Claude often felt deeply depressed. He stopped working, went out by himself, and wandered around Faucheur’s inn at the place where the ferry dropped off passengers, as if he were always expecting to see all of Paris arrive there. He was obsessed with Paris; he visited every month and came back feeling desolate and unable to work. Autumn came, then winter—a very wet and muddy winter—and he spent it in a state of gloomy lethargy, even resenting Sandoz, who, after getting married in October, could no longer visit Bennecourt as often. Claude only seemed to come alive during Sandoz's visits, deriving a week’s worth of excitement from them and constantly discussing the news from afar. He, who once hid his longing for Paris, now overwhelmed Christine with the way he talked to her from morning till night about things she knew nothing about and people she had never met. When Jacques fell asleep, the parents had endless discussions while sitting by the fire. Claude became passionate, and Christine felt compelled to give her opinion and weigh in on all sorts of topics.
Was not Gagnière an idiot for stultifying his brain with music, he who might have developed so conscientious a talent as a landscape painter? It was said that he was now taking lessons on the piano from a young lady—the idea, at his age! What did she, Christine, think of it? And Jory had been trying to get into the good graces of Irma Bécot again, ever since she had secured that little house in the Rue de Moscou! Christine knew those two; two jades who well went together, weren’t they? But the most cunning of the whole lot was Fagerolles, to whom he, Claude, would tell a few plain truths and no mistake, when he met him. What! the turn-coat had competed for the Prix de Rome, which, of course, he had managed to miss. To think of it. That fellow did nothing but jeer at the School, and talked about knocking everything down, yet took part in official competitions! Ah, there was no doubt but that the itching to succeed, the wish to pass over one’s comrades and be hailed by idiots, impelled some people to very dirty tricks. Surely Christine did not mean to stick up for him, eh? She was not sufficiently a philistine to defend him. And when she had agreed with everything Claude said, he always came back with nervous laughter to the same story—which he thought exceedingly comical—the story of Mahoudeau and Chaîne, who, between them, had killed little Jabouille, the husband of Mathilde, that dreadful herbalist woman. Yes, killed the poor consumptive fellow with kindness one evening when he had had a fainting fit, and when, on being called in by the woman, they had taken to rubbing him with so much vigour that he had remained dead in their hands.
Wasn’t Gagnière an idiot for filling his mind with music when he could have developed a serious talent as a landscape painter? It was said that he was now taking piano lessons from a young lady—the thought, at his age! What did she, Christine, think about it? And Jory had been trying to win back Irma Bécot ever since she got that little house in the Rue de Moscou! Christine knew those two; a couple of no-good characters who really matched, right? But the most cunning of the whole group was Fagerolles, and Claude intended to give him a piece of his mind when they crossed paths. What! The traitor had entered the Prix de Rome competition, which, of course, he’d missed. Just think about it. That guy spent all his time mocking the School, talking about tearing everything down, yet took part in official competitions! Ah, there’s no doubt that the craving for success, the desire to outshine one’s peers and be celebrated by fools, drove some people to very petty actions. Surely Christine didn’t plan to defend him, did she? She wasn’t so much of a philistine as to back him up. And every time she agreed with everything Claude said, he always returned with nervous laughter to the same tale—which he found hilarious—the story of Mahoudeau and Chaîne, who together had killed little Jabouille, the husband of that dreadful herbalist Mathilde. Yes, they killed the poor guy with kindness one evening when he had a fainting fit, and when called in by the woman, they rubbed him down so vigorously that he ended up dead in their hands.
And if Christine failed to look amused at all this, Claude rose up and said, in a churlish voice: ‘Oh, you; nothing will make you laugh—let’s go to bed.’
And if Christine didn’t seem amused by all this, Claude got up and said, in an irritable tone: ‘Oh, you; nothing is going to make you laugh—let’s go to bed.’
He still adored her, but she no longer sufficed. Another torment had invincibly seized hold of him—the passion for art, the thirst for fame.
He still loved her, but she was no longer enough. Another torment had taken a strong grip on him—the passion for art, the desire for fame.
In the spring, Claude, who, with an affectation of disdain, had sworn he would never again exhibit, began to worry a great deal about the Salon. Whenever he saw Sandoz he questioned him about what the comrades were going to send. On the opening day he went to Paris and came back the same evening, stern and trembling. There was only a bust by Mahoudeau, said he, good enough, but of no importance. A small landscape by Gagnière, admitted among the ruck, was also of a pretty sunny tone. Then there was nothing else, nothing but Fagerolles’ picture—an actress in front of her looking-glass painting her face. He had not mentioned it at first; but he now spoke of it with indignant laughter. What a trickster that Fagerolles was! Now that he had missed his prize he was no longer afraid to exhibit—he threw the School overboard; but you should have seen how skilfully he managed it, what compromises he effected, painting in a style which aped the audacity of truth without possessing one original merit. And it would be sure to meet with success, the bourgeois were only too fond of being titillated while the artist pretended to hustle them. Ah! it was time indeed for a true artist to appear in that mournful desert of a Salon, amid all the knaves and the fools. And, by heavens, what a place might be taken there!
In the spring, Claude, who had pretended to be above it all and vowed he would never exhibit again, started to worry a lot about the Salon. Whenever he ran into Sandoz, he asked him what the other artists were planning to submit. On the opening day, he went to Paris and came back the same evening, serious and anxious. There was only a bust by Mahoudeau, which was decent but not significant. A small landscape by Gagnière, considered mediocre, also had a nice sunny vibe. Other than that, there was just Fagerolles’ painting—a woman in front of her mirror putting on makeup. He hadn’t mentioned it at first, but now he talked about it with angry laughter. What a con artist that Fagerolles was! Now that he had missed his chance for a prize, he wasn’t afraid to show his work—he ditched the traditional style; but you should have seen how cleverly he did it, making compromises by painting in a way that mimicked bold realism without having any genuine merit. And it was bound to be a hit; the middle class loved to be teased while the artist pretended to push their buttons. Ah! it was definitely time for a true artist to emerge in that dismal wasteland of a Salon, surrounded by all the frauds and fools. And, by heaven, what a spot could be claimed there!
Christine, who listened while he grew angry, ended by faltering:
Christine, who listened as he got angrier, finally hesitated:
‘If you liked, we might go back to Paris.’
‘If you want, we could go back to Paris.’
‘Who was talking of that?’ he shouted. ‘One can never say a word to you but you at once jump to false conclusions.’
‘Who was talking about that?’ he yelled. ‘You can never say anything to you without you immediately jumping to wrong conclusions.’
Six weeks afterwards he heard some news that occupied his mind for a week. His friend Dubuche was going to marry Mademoiselle Régine Margaillan, the daughter of the owner of La Richaudière. It was an intricate story, the details of which surprised and amused him exceedingly. First of all, that cur Dubuche had managed to hook a medal for a design of a villa in a park, which he had exhibited; that of itself was already sufficiently amusing, as it was said that the drawing had been set on its legs by his master, Dequersonnière, who had quietly obtained this medal for him from the jury over which he presided. Then the best of it was that this long-awaited reward had decided the marriage. Ah! it would be nice trafficking if medals were now awarded to settle needy pupils in rich families! Old Margaillan, like all parvenus, had set his heart upon having a son-in-law who could help him, by bringing authentic diplomas and fashionable clothes into the business; and for some time past he had had his eyes on that young man, that pupil of the School of Arts, whose notes were excellent, who was so persevering, and so highly recommended by his masters. The medal aroused his enthusiasm; he at once gave the young fellow his daughter and took him as a partner, who would soon increase his millions now lying idle, since he knew all that was needful in order to build properly. Besides, by this arrangement poor Régine, always low-spirited and ailing, would at least have a husband in perfect health.
Six weeks later, he heard some news that occupied his mind for a week. His friend Dubuche was going to marry Mademoiselle Régine Margaillan, the daughter of the owner of La Richaudière. It was a complicated story, the details of which surprised and amused him greatly. First of all, that pesky Dubuche had managed to snag a medal for a villa design he exhibited; that alone was pretty funny since it was said that his teacher, Dequersonnière, had quietly pulled some strings to get him that medal from the jury he chaired. The best part was that this long-awaited recognition had sealed the marriage deal. Ah! It would be something if medals were handed out to secure needy students in wealthy families! Old Margaillan, like all new money, wanted a son-in-law who could help him by bringing real credentials and trendy clothes into the business; and for some time, he had been keeping an eye on that young man, that student from the School of Arts, whose grades were excellent, who was incredibly dedicated, and highly recommended by his teachers. The medal sparked his enthusiasm; he immediately gave the young man his daughter and took him on as a partner, who would soon boost his millions that were sitting idle, since he knew everything necessary to build properly. Besides, with this arrangement, poor Régine, who always seemed down and unwell, would at least have a husband in perfect health.
‘Well, a man must be fond of money to marry that wretched flayed kitten,’ repeated Claude.
‘Well, a guy must really love money to marry that miserable skinned kitten,’ repeated Claude.
And as Christine compassionately took the girl’s part, he added:
And as Christine empathetically supported the girl, he added:
‘But I am not down upon her. So much the better if the marriage does not finish her off. She is certainly not to be blamed, if her father, the ex-stonemason, had the stupid ambition to marry a girl of the middle-classes. Her father, you know, has the vitiated blood of generations of drunkards in his veins, and her mother comes of a stock in the last stages of degeneracy. Ah! they may coin money, but that doesn’t prevent them from being excrescences on the face of the earth!’
‘But I’m not holding it against her. It’s a good thing if the marriage doesn’t ruin her. She shouldn’t be blamed if her father, a former stonemason, had the misguided ambition to marry someone from the middle class. Her father, as you know, has the tainted blood of generations of alcoholics in him, and her mother comes from a lineage that’s in the final stages of decline. Ah! They might be able to make money, but that doesn’t stop them from being blemishes on the face of the earth!’
He was growing ferocious, and Christine had to clasp him in her arms and kiss him, and laugh, to make him once more the good-natured fellow of earlier days. Then, having calmed down, he professed to understand things, saying that he approved of the marriages of his old chums. It was true enough, all three had taken wives unto themselves. How funny life was!
He was becoming angry, and Christine had to hold him in her arms and kiss him, and laugh, to make him the easygoing guy he used to be. After he calmed down, he claimed to understand everything, saying that he supported the marriages of his old friends. It was true, all three had gotten married. Life was so funny!
Once more the summer drew to an end; it was the fourth spent at Bennecourt. In reality they could never be happier than now; life was peaceful and cheap in the depths of that village. Since they had been there they had never lacked money. Claude’s thousand francs a year and the proceeds of the few pictures he had sold had sufficed for their wants; they had even put something by, and had bought some house linen. On the other hand, little Jacques, by now two years and a half old, got on admirably in the country. From morning till night he rolled about the garden, ragged and dirt-begrimed, but growing as he listed in robust ruddy health. His mother often did not know where to take hold of him when she wished to wash him a bit. However, when she saw him eat and sleep well she did not trouble much; she reserved her anxious affection for her big child of an artist, whose despondency filled her with anguish. The situation grew worse each day, and although they lived on peacefully without any cause for grief, they, nevertheless, drifted to melancholy, to a discomfort that showed itself in constant irritation.
Once again, summer was coming to an end; this was their fourth year at Bennecourt. In reality, they had never been happier than they were now; life was calm and affordable in the heart of that village. Since moving there, they had never run out of money. Claude's income of a thousand francs a year, along with the earnings from the few paintings he had sold, was enough to cover their needs; they had even saved some money and bought some household linens. Meanwhile, little Jacques, now two and a half years old, was thriving in the countryside. From morning until night, he played in the garden, scruffy and covered in dirt, but growing strong and healthy. His mother often struggled to catch him when she wanted to give him a wash. However, when she saw him eating and sleeping well, she didn’t worry much; she reserved her concern for her big artist child, whose gloominess deeply troubled her. The situation worsened each day, and even though they lived peacefully without any real reasons for sorrow, they still found themselves slipping into melancholy, which came out as constant irritability.
It was all over with their first delights of country life. Their rotten boat, staved in, had gone to the bottom of the Seine. Besides, they did not even think of availing themselves of the skiff that the Faucheurs had placed at their disposal. The river bored them; they had grown too lazy to row. They repeated their exclamations of former times respecting certain delightful nooks in the islets, but without ever being tempted to return and gaze upon them. Even the walks by the river-side had lost their charm—one was broiled there in summer, and one caught cold there in winter. And as for the plateau, the vast stretch of land planted with apple trees that overlooked the village, it became like a distant country, something too far off for one to be silly enough to risk one’s legs there. Their house also annoyed them—that barracks where they had to take their meals amid the greasy refuse of the kitchen, where their room seemed a meeting-place for the winds from every point of the compass. As a finishing stroke of bad luck, the apricots had failed that year, and the finest of the giant rose-bushes, which were very old, had been smitten with some canker or other and died. How sorely time and habit wore everything away! How eternal nature herself seemed to age amidst that satiated weariness. But the worst was that the painter himself was getting disgusted with the country, no longer finding a single subject to arouse his enthusiasm, but scouring the fields with a mournful tramp, as if the whole place were a void, whose life he had exhausted without leaving as much as an overlooked tree, an unforeseen effect of light to interest him. No, it was over, frozen, he should never again be able to paint anything worth looking at in that confounded country!
It was all over with their initial joys of country life. Their broken boat had sunk to the bottom of the Seine. Plus, they didn’t even think about using the skiff that the Faucheurs had made available to them. The river bored them; they had become too lazy to row. They repeated their past praises of certain charming spots on the islets, but they were never tempted to go back and see them. Even the riverside walks had lost their appeal— you’d roast there in summer and catch a cold in winter. As for the plateau, the vast area of apple trees overlooking the village felt like a distant land, something too far away for anyone to be foolish enough to risk going there. Their house annoyed them too— that place where they had to eat amid the greasy leftovers from the kitchen, and where their room felt like a meeting point for winds from every direction. To top it all off, the apricots had failed that year, and the oldest of the giant rose bushes had been struck with some disease and died. How much time and familiarity could wear everything down! How eternal nature itself seemed to age amidst that exhausted weariness. But the worst part was that the painter himself was getting sick of the countryside, no longer finding a single subject that sparked his enthusiasm, instead wandering the fields with a heavy step, as if the whole place were empty, drained of life without leaving behind even a tree or a surprising light effect to capture his interest. No, it was over, frozen; he would never be able to paint anything worth looking at in that cursed country again!
October came with its rain-laden sky. On one of the first wet evenings Claude flew into a passion because dinner was not ready. He turned that goose of a Mélie out of the house and clouted Jacques, who got between his legs. Whereupon, Christine, crying, kissed him and said:
October arrived with its rainy skies. One of the first wet evenings, Claude got really angry because dinner wasn’t ready. He kicked that silly Mélie out of the house and pushed Jacques, who got in his way. Then, Christine, crying, kissed him and said:
‘Let’s go, oh, let us go back to Paris.’
‘Let’s go, oh, let’s head back to Paris.’
He disengaged himself, and cried in an angry voice: ‘What, again! Never! do you hear me?’
He pulled away and shouted angrily, "What, again? No way! Do you hear me?"
‘Do it for my sake,’ she said, warmly. ‘It’s I who ask it of you, it’s I that you’ll please.’
‘Do it for me,’ she said, warmly. ‘I’m the one asking you, I’m the one you’ll be pleasing.’
‘Why, are you tired of being here, then?’
‘Are you tired of being here, then?’
‘Yes, I shall die if we stay here much longer; and, besides I want you to work. I feel quite certain that your place is there. It would be a crime for you to bury yourself here any longer.’
‘Yes, I’ll die if we stay here much longer; and besides, I want you to work. I’m sure your place is out there. It would be a shame for you to waste your life here any longer.’
‘No, leave me!’
‘No, just go!’
He was quivering. On the horizon Paris was calling him, the Paris of winter-tide which was being lighted up once more. He thought he could hear from where he stood the great efforts that his comrades were making, and, in fancy, he returned thither in order that they might not triumph without him, in order that he might become their chief again, since not one of them had strength or pride enough to be such. And amid this hallucination, amid the desire he felt to hasten to Paris, he yet persisted in refusing to do so, from a spirit of involuntary contradiction, which arose, though he could not account for it, from his very entrails. Was it the fear with which the bravest quivers, the mute struggle of happiness seeking to resist the fatality of destiny?
He was shaking. In the distance, Paris was calling to him, the Paris of winter that was being lit up once again. He thought he could hear the great efforts his friends were making from where he stood, and in his mind, he imagined returning there so they wouldn’t succeed without him, so he could become their leader again, since none of them had the strength or pride to take on that role. And amidst this illusion, amid his desire to rush to Paris, he still held back, driven by a kind of involuntary contradiction that he couldn’t explain, coming from deep within him. Was it the fear that even the bravest feel, the silent battle of happiness trying to resist the inevitability of fate?
‘Listen,’ said Christine, excitedly. ‘I shall get our boxes ready, and take you away.’
‘Listen,’ Christine said excitedly. ‘I’ll get our boxes ready and take you away.’
Five days later, after packing and sending their chattels to the railway, they started for Paris.
Five days later, after packing and sending their belongings to the train, they headed to Paris.
Claude was already on the road with little Jacques, when Christine fancied that she had forgotten something. She returned alone to the house; and finding it quite bare and empty, she burst out crying. It seemed as if something were being torn from her, as if she were leaving something of herself behind—what, she could not say. How willingly would she have remained! how ardent was her wish to live there always—she who had just insisted on that departure, that return to the city of passion where she scented the presence of a rival. However, she continued searching for what she lacked, and in front of the kitchen she ended by plucking a rose, a last rose, which the cold was turning brown. And then she slowly closed the gate upon the deserted garden.
Claude was already on the road with little Jacques when Christine felt like she had forgotten something. She went back to the house alone and, finding it completely empty, she burst into tears. It felt as if something was being ripped away from her, as if she was leaving a part of herself behind—she couldn't explain what. How much she would have loved to stay! How desperately she wanted to live there forever—she who had just insisted on leaving, returning to the city of passion where she sensed the presence of a rival. Still, she kept looking for what she was missing, and in front of the kitchen, she ended up picking a rose, a last rose that the cold was turning brown. Then she slowly closed the gate behind her, leaving the deserted garden.
VII
WHEN Claude found himself once more on the pavement of Paris he was seized with a feverish longing for hubbub and motion, a desire to gad about, scour the whole city, and see his chums. He was off the moment he awoke, leaving Christine to get things shipshape by herself in the studio which they had taken in the Rue de Douai, near the Boulevard de Clichy. In this way, on the second day of his arrival, he dropped in at Mahoudeau’s at eight o’clock in the morning, in the chill, grey November dawn which had barely risen.
WHEN Claude found himself back on the streets of Paris, he was struck by a restless desire for excitement and movement, a need to wander around, explore the whole city, and see his friends. He took off the moment he woke up, leaving Christine to tidy up the studio they had rented on Rue de Douai, close to Boulevard de Clichy. This is how, on the second day of his arrival, he dropped by Mahoudeau’s at eight o’clock in the morning, in the chilly, gray November dawn that had just started to break.
However, the shop in the Rue du Cherche-Midi, which the sculptor still occupied, was open, and Mahoudeau himself, half asleep, with a white face, was shivering as he took down the shutters.
However, the shop on Rue du Cherche-Midi, which the sculptor still occupied, was open, and Mahoudeau himself, half asleep, with a pale face, was shivering as he took down the shutters.
Ah! it’s you. The devil! you’ve got into early habits in the country. So it’s settled—you are back for good?’
Ah! It's you. The devil! You've gotten used to country life. So it's decided—are you back for good?
‘Yes; since the day before yesterday.’
‘Yes; since the day before yesterday.’
‘That’s all right. Then we shall see something of each other. Come in; it’s sharp this morning.’
‘That’s fine. Then we’ll see a bit of each other. Come in; it’s chilly this morning.’
But Claude felt colder in the shop than outside. He kept the collar of his coat turned up, and plunged his hands deep into his pockets; shivering before the dripping moisture of the bare walls, the muddy heaps of clay, and the pools of water soddening the floor. A blast of poverty had swept into the place, emptying the shelves of the casts from the antique, and smashing stands and buckets, which were now held together with bits of rope. It was an abode of dirt and disorder, a mason’s cellar going to rack and ruin. On the window of the door, besmeared with whitewash, there appeared in mockery, as it were, a large beaming sun, roughly drawn with thumb-strokes, and ornamented in the centre with a face, the mouth of which, describing a semicircle, seemed likely to burst with laughter.
But Claude felt colder inside the shop than outside. He kept the collar of his coat turned up and shoved his hands deep into his pockets, shivering in front of the dripping moisture on the bare walls, the muddy piles of clay, and the puddles soaking the floor. A wave of poverty had swept through the place, clearing the shelves of antique casts and breaking stands and buckets, which were now held together with pieces of rope. It was a place of dirt and chaos, a mason’s cellar falling apart. On the window of the door, smeared with whitewash, there was a large, crudely drawn sun, with a face in the center, its mouth shaped like a semicircle that looked like it was about to burst into laughter.
‘Just wait,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘a fire’s being lighted. These confounded workshops get chilly directly, with the water from the covering cloths.’
‘Just wait,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘they’re starting a fire. These annoying workshops get cold right away with all the water from the covering cloths.’
At that moment, Claude, on turning round, noticed Chaîne on his knees near the stove, pulling the straw from the seat of an old stool to light the coals with. He bade him good-morning, but only elicited a muttered growl, without succeeding in making him look up.
At that moment, Claude turned around and saw Chaîne on his knees by the stove, pulling straw from the seat of an old stool to light the coals. He said good morning, but only got a grunt in response and couldn’t get him to look up.
‘And what are you doing just now, old man?’ he asked the sculptor.
‘And what are you doing right now, old man?’ he asked the sculptor.
‘Oh! nothing of much account. It’s been a bad year—worse than the last one, which wasn’t worth a rap. There’s a crisis in the church-statue business. Yes, the market for holy wares is bad, and, dash it, I’ve had to tighten my belt! Look, in the meanwhile, I’m reduced to this.’
‘Oh! It’s not really anything significant. It’s been a tough year—worse than last year, which wasn’t worth anything either. There’s a crisis in the church-statue business. Yeah, the market for religious items is struggling, and, darn it, I’ve had to cut back! Look, in the meantime, I’m down to this.’
He thereupon took the linen wraps off a bust, showing a long face still further elongated by whiskers, a face full of conceit and infinite imbecility.
He then removed the linen wraps from a bust, revealing a long face even more stretched out by whiskers, a face full of arrogance and endless foolishness.
‘It’s an advocate who lives near by. Doesn’t he look repugnant, eh? And the way he worries me about being very careful with his mouth. However, a fellow must eat, mustn’t he?’
‘It’s a lawyer who lives nearby. Doesn’t he look disgusting, huh? And the way he keeps nagging me to be really careful with my words. But a guy has to eat, right?’
He certainly had an idea for the Salon; an upright figure, a girl about to bathe, dipping her foot in the water, and shivering at its freshness with that slight shiver that renders a woman so adorable. He showed Claude a little model of it, which was already cracking, and the painter looked at it in silence, surprised and displeased at certain concessions he noticed in it: a sprouting of prettiness from beneath a persistent exaggeration of form, a natural desire to please, blended with a lingering tendency to the colossal. However, Mahoudeau began lamenting; an upright figure was no end of a job. He would want iron braces that cost money, and a modelling frame, which he had not got; in fact, a lot of appliances. So he would, no doubt, decide to model the figure in a recumbent attitude beside the water.
He definitely had an idea for the Salon; a standing figure, a girl about to bathe, dipping her foot in the water and shivering from its coolness with that slight tremble that makes a woman so charming. He showed Claude a small model of it, which was already cracking, and the painter examined it in silence, surprised and unhappy with certain aspects he noticed: a burst of prettiness emerging from a persistent exaggeration of form, a natural urge to attract attention mixed with a lingering inclination towards the grandiose. However, Mahoudeau began to complain; creating a standing figure was a huge task. He would need iron braces that cost money and a modeling frame, which he didn’t have; in fact, a lot of tools. So he would probably decide to model the figure in a reclining position next to the water.
‘Well, what do you say—what do you think of it?’ he asked.
‘So, what do you think about it?’ he asked.
‘Not bad,’ answered the painter at last. ‘A little bit sentimental, in spite of the strapping limbs; but it’ll all depend upon the execution. And put her upright, old man; upright, for there would be nothing in it otherwise.’
‘Not bad,’ replied the painter finally. ‘A little sentimental, despite the strong limbs; but it all depends on how you execute it. And make sure to position her upright, my friend; upright, because otherwise, there wouldn’t be much to it.’
The stove was roaring, and Chaîne, still mute, rose up. He prowled about for a minute, entered the dark back shop, where stood the bed that he shared with Mahoudeau, and then reappeared, his hat on his head, but more silent, it seemed, than ever. With his awkward peasant fingers he leisurely took up a stick of charcoal and then wrote on the wall: ‘I am going to buy some tobacco; put some more coals in the stove.’ And forthwith he went out.
The stove was blazing, and Chaîne, still silent, got up. He wandered around for a minute, went into the dark back room where the bed he shared with Mahoudeau was, and then came back out, his hat on his head but seeming even quieter than before. With his clumsy farmer fingers, he casually picked up a piece of charcoal and wrote on the wall: ‘I’m going to buy some tobacco; put more coals in the stove.’ And then he walked out.
Claude, who had watched him writing, turned to the other in amazement.
Claude, who had been watching him write, turned to the other person in surprise.
‘What’s up?’
'What's going on?'
‘We no longer speak to one another; we write,’ said the sculptor, quietly.
‘We don't talk to each other anymore; we write,’ said the sculptor, quietly.
‘Since when?’
"Since when?"
‘Since three months ago.’
"Three months ago."
‘And you sleep together?’
"Do you guys sleep together?"
‘Yes.’
"Yep."
Claude burst out laughing. Ah! dash it all! they must have hard nuts. But what was the reason of this falling-out? Then Mahoudeau vented his rage against that brute of a Chaîne! Hadn’t he, one night on coming home unexpectedly, found him treating Mathilde, the herbalist woman, to a pot of jam? No, he would never forgive him for treating himself in that dirty fashion to delicacies on the sly, while he, Mahoudeau, was half starving, and eating dry bread. The deuce! one ought to share and share alike.
Claude burst out laughing. Ah! damn it all! They must have really tough nuts. But what was the reason for this fight? Then Mahoudeau let loose his anger at that brute Chaîne! Hadn’t he, one night when he came home unexpectedly, found him treating Mathilde, the herbalist, to a jar of jam? No, he would never forgive him for indulging himself in such a sneaky way with treats while he, Mahoudeau, was half starving and eating dry bread. For crying out loud! One should share equally.
And the grudge had now lasted for nearly three months without a break, without an explanation. They had arranged their lives accordingly; they had reduced their strictly necessary intercourse to a series of short phrases charcoaled on the walls. As for the rest, they lived as before, sharing the same bed in the back shop. After all, there was no need for so much talk in life, people managed to understand one another all the same.
And the grudge had now gone on for nearly three months without interruption, without any explanation. They had adjusted their lives accordingly; they had limited their essential interactions to a series of brief phrases scrawled on the walls. As for everything else, they lived as before, sharing the same bed in the back room. After all, there wasn't much need for so much talking in life; people still managed to understand each other just fine.
While filling the stove, Mahoudeau continued to relieve his mind.
While filling the stove, Mahoudeau kept talking to himself to clear his mind.
‘Well, you may believe me if you like, but when a fellow’s almost starving it isn’t disagreeable to keep quiet. Yes, one gets numb amidst silence; it’s like an inside coating that stills the gnawing of the stomach a bit. Ah, that Chaîne! You haven’t a notion of his peasant nature. When he had spent his last copper without earning the fortune he expected by painting, he went into trade, a petty trade, which was to enable him to finish his studies. Isn’t the fellow a sharp ‘un, eh? And just listen to his plan. He had some olive oil sent to him from Saint-Firmin, his village, and then he tramped the streets and found a market for the oil among well-to-do families from Provence living in Paris. Unfortunately, it did not last. He is such a clod-hopper that they showed him the door on all sides. And as there was a jar of oil left which nobody would buy, well, old man, we live upon it. Yes, on the days when we happen to have some bread we dip our bread into it.’
‘Well, you can believe me if you want, but when you're almost starving, it's not so bad to stay quiet. Yeah, you get numb when it's silent; it’s like a layer inside that takes the edge off your hunger a bit. Oh, that Chaîne! You can’t imagine his peasant background. After he spent his last penny without making the fortune he thought he would from painting, he turned to business, a small one, to help him finish his studies. Isn’t he clever, huh? And just listen to his idea. He had some olive oil sent to him from Saint-Firmin, his hometown, and then he walked the streets looking for rich families from Provence living in Paris who would buy it. Unfortunately, it didn’t last long. He’s such a klutz that they kicked him out everywhere. And since there was a jar of oil left that nobody wanted to buy, well, my friend, we live off it. Yeah, on the days when we actually have some bread, we dip our bread in it.’
Thereupon he pointed to the jar standing in a corner of the shop. Some of the oil having been spilt, the wall and the floor were darkened by large greasy stains.
Thereupon he pointed to the jar sitting in a corner of the shop. Some of the oil had spilled, leaving big greasy stains on the wall and the floor.
Claude left off laughing. Ah! misery, how discouraging it was! how could he show himself hard on those whom it crushed? He walked about the studio, no longer vexed at finding models weakened by concessions to middle-class taste; he even felt tolerant with regard to that hideous bust. But, all at once, he came across a copy that Chaîne had made at the Louvre, a Mantegna, which was marvellously exact in its dryness.
Claude stopped laughing. Ah! misery, how discouraging it was! How could he be harsh on those it crushed? He walked around the studio, no longer annoyed at finding models weakened by giving in to middle-class tastes; he even felt accepting of that ugly bust. But suddenly, he came across a copy that Chaîne had made at the Louvre, a Mantegna, which was remarkably precise in its dryness.
‘Oh, the brute,’ he muttered, ‘it’s almost the original; he’s never done anything better than that. Perhaps his only fault is that he was born four centuries too late.’
‘Oh, the jerk,’ he muttered, ‘it’s pretty much the original; he’s never done anything better than that. Maybe his only flaw is that he was born four centuries too late.’
Then, as the heat became too great, he took off his over-coat, adding:
Then, as the heat became too much, he took off his overcoat, adding:
‘He’s a long while fetching his tobacco.’
‘He’s taking a long time to get his tobacco.’
‘Oh! his tobacco! I know what that means,’ said Mahoudeau, who had set to work at his bust, finishing the whiskers; ‘he has simply gone next door.’
‘Oh! his tobacco! I know what that means,’ said Mahoudeau, who had started working on his bust, finishing the whiskers; ‘he’s just gone next door.’
‘Oh! so you still see the herbalist?’
‘Oh! So you’re still seeing the herbalist?’
‘Yes, she comes in and out.’
"Yeah, she comes and goes."
He spoke of Mathilde and Chaîne without the least show of anger, simply saying that he thought the woman crazy. Since little Jabouille’s death she had become devout again, though this did not prevent her from scandalising the neighbourhood. Her business was going to wreck, and bankruptcy seemed impending. One night, the gas company having cut off the gas in default of payment, she had come to borrow some of their olive oil, which, after all, would not burn in the lamps. In short, it was quite a disaster; that mysterious shop, with its fleeting shadows of priests’ gowns, its discreet confessional-like whispers, and its odour of sacristy incense, was gliding to the abandonment of ruin. And the wretchedness had reached such a point that the dried herbs suspended from the ceiling swarmed with spiders, while defunct leeches, which had already turned green, floated on the tops of the glass jars.
He talked about Mathilde and Chaîne without showing any anger, just saying that he thought the woman was crazy. Since little Jabouille’s death, she had become religious again, though that didn’t stop her from causing a scandal in the neighborhood. Her business was falling apart, and bankruptcy seemed just around the corner. One night, when the gas company had cut off the gas due to unpaid bills, she came to borrow some of their olive oil, which, after all, wouldn’t burn in the lamps. In short, it was a complete disaster; that mysterious shop, with its fleeting shadows of priests’ robes, its discreet, confessional-like whispers, and its scent of sacristy incense, was slipping into ruin. The situation had deteriorated to the point that the dried herbs hanging from the ceiling were swarming with spiders, while dead leeches, which had already turned green, floated in the tops of the glass jars.
‘Hallo, here he comes!’ resumed the sculptor. ‘You’ll see her arrive at his heels.’
‘Hey, here he comes!’ the sculptor said again. ‘You’ll see her show up right behind him.’
In fact, Chaîne came in. He made a great show of drawing a screw of tobacco from his pocket, then filled his pipe, and began to smoke in front of the stove, remaining obstinately silent, as if there were nobody present. And immediately afterwards Mathilde made her appearance like a neighbour who comes in to say ‘Good morning.’ Claude thought that she had grown still thinner, but her eyes were all afire, and her mouth was seemingly enlarged by the loss of two more teeth. The smell of aromatic herbs which she always carried in her uncombed hair seemed to have become rancid. There was no longer the sweetness of camomile, the freshness of aniseed; she filled the place with a horrid odour of peppermint that seemed to be her very breath.
In fact, Chaîne came in. He put on a big show of pulling a plug of tobacco from his pocket, filled his pipe, and started smoking in front of the stove, staying stubbornly quiet as if no one was there. Soon after, Mathilde showed up like a neighbor stopping by to say ‘Hi.’ Claude thought she looked even thinner, but her eyes were blazing, and her mouth seemed to be bigger because she had lost two more teeth. The smell of aromatic herbs that she always carried in her messy hair now felt stale. There was no longer the sweetness of chamomile or the freshness of anise; instead, she filled the room with a disgusting stench of peppermint that seemed to come from her very breath.
‘Already at work!’ she exclaimed. ‘Good morning.’ And, without minding Claude, she kissed Mahoudeau. Then, after going to shake hands with the painter in her brazen way, she continued:
‘Already at work!’ she exclaimed. ‘Good morning.’ And, without paying attention to Claude, she kissed Mahoudeau. Then, after boldly shaking hands with the painter, she continued:
‘What do you think? I’ve found a box of mallow root, and we will treat ourselves to it for breakfast. Isn’t that nice of me now! We’ll share.’
‘What do you think? I found a box of mallow root, and we’re going to treat ourselves to it for breakfast. Isn’t that nice of me? We’ll share.’
‘Thanks,’ said the sculptor, ‘it makes my mouth sticky. I prefer to smoke a pipe.’
'Thanks,' said the sculptor, 'it makes my mouth feel sticky. I prefer smoking a pipe.'
And, seeing that Claude was putting on his overcoat again, he asked: ‘Are you going?’
And, noticing that Claude was putting on his overcoat again, he asked, "Are you leaving?"
‘Yes. I want to get the rust off, and breathe the air of Paris a bit.’
‘Yes. I want to get the rust off and enjoy the air of Paris for a while.’
All the same, he stopped for another few minutes watching Chaîne and Mathilde, who stuffed themselves with mallow root, each taking a piece by turns. And though he had been warned, he was again amazed when he saw Mahoudeau take up the stick of charcoal and write on the wall: ‘Give me the tobacco you have shoved into your pocket.’
All the same, he paused for a few more minutes watching Chaîne and Mathilde, who were munching on mallow root, each taking a piece in turns. And even though he had been warned, he was once again surprised when he saw Mahoudeau pick up the stick of charcoal and write on the wall: ‘Give me the tobacco you’ve stuffed into your pocket.’
Without a word, Chaîne took out the screw and handed it to the sculptor, who filled his pipe.
Without saying a word, Chaîne took out the screw and handed it to the sculptor, who loaded his pipe.
‘Well, I’ll see you again soon,’ said Claude.
‘Well, I’ll see you again soon,’ said Claude.
‘Yes, soon—at any rate, next Thursday, at Sandoz’s.’
‘Yes, soon—definitely next Thursday, at Sandoz’s.’
Outside, Claude gave an exclamation of surprise on jostling a gentleman, who stood in front of the herbalist’s peering into the shop.
Outside, Claude exclaimed in surprise as he bumped into a gentleman who was standing in front of the herbalist's, looking into the shop.
‘What, Jory! What are you doing there?’
‘What, Jory! What are you doing there?’
Jory’s big pink nose gave a sniff.
Jory's large pink nose sniffed.
‘I? Nothing. I was passing and looked in,’ said he in dismay.
‘I? Nothing. I was just passing by and looked in,’ he said in disappointment.
Then he decided to laugh, and, as if there were any one to overhear him, lowered his voice to ask:
Then he decided to laugh, and, as if someone might overhear him, he lowered his voice to ask:
‘She is next door with our friends, isn’t she? All right; let’s be off, quick!’
'She’s next door with our friends, right? Okay; let’s go, quickly!’
And he took the painter with him, telling him all manner of strange stories of that creature Mathilde.
And he brought the painter along, sharing all sorts of strange stories about that creature Mathilde.
‘But you used to say that she was frightful,’ said Claude, laughing.
"But you used to say she was terrifying," Claude said, laughing.
Jory made a careless gesture. Frightful? No, he had not gone as far as that. Besides, there might be something attractive about a woman even though she had a plain face. Then he expressed his surprise at seeing Claude in Paris, and, when he had been fully posted, and learned that the painter meant to remain there for good, he all at once exclaimed:
Jory made a careless gesture. Frightening? No, he hadn't gone that far. Besides, there could be something appealing about a woman even if she had an ordinary face. Then he expressed his surprise at seeing Claude in Paris, and when he was fully updated and found out that the painter planned to stay there for good, he suddenly exclaimed:
‘Listen, I am going to take you with me. You must come to lunch with me at Irma’s.’
‘Hey, I’m taking you with me. You have to come to lunch with me at Irma’s.’
The painter, taken aback, refused energetically, and gave as a reason that he wasn’t even wearing a frock-coat.
The painter, surprised, firmly declined, stating that he wasn't even wearing a formal coat.
‘What does that matter? On the contrary, it makes it more droll. She’ll be delighted. I believe she has a secret partiality for you. She is always talking about you to us. Come, don’t be a fool. I tell you she expects me this morning, and we shall be received like princes.’
‘What does that matter? On the contrary, it makes it even funnier. She’ll be thrilled. I think she has a bit of a crush on you. She’s always bringing you up with us. Come on, don’t be ridiculous. I’m telling you, she’s expecting me this morning, and we’re going to be treated like royalty.’
He did not relax his hold on Claude’s arm, and they both continued their way towards the Madeleine, talking all the while. As a rule, Jory kept silent about his many love adventures, just as a drunkard keeps silent about his potations. But that morning he brimmed over with revelations, chaffed himself and owned to all sorts of scandalous things. After all he was delighted with existence, his affairs went apace. His miserly father had certainly cut off the supplies once more, cursing him for obstinately pursuing a scandalous career, but he did not care a rap for that now; he earned between seven and eight thousand francs a year by journalism, in which he was making his way as a gossipy leader writer and art critic. The noisy days of ‘The Drummer,’ the articles at a louis apiece, had been left far behind. He was getting steady, wrote for two widely circulated papers, and although, in his inmost heart he remained a sceptical voluptuary, a worshipper of success at any price, he was acquiring importance, and readers began to look upon his opinions as fiats. Swayed by hereditary meanness, he already invested money every month in petty speculations, which were only known to himself, for never had his vices cost him less than nowadays.
He didn’t let go of Claude’s arm, and they continued walking toward the Madeleine, chatting the whole time. Usually, Jory kept quiet about his many romantic escapades, much like a drunk keeps quiet about his drinking. But that morning, he was overflowing with stories, joking about himself and admitting to all kinds of scandalous things. After all, he was feeling great about life; things were going well for him. His stingy father had once again stopped his allowance, complaining about his stubborn choice to pursue a scandalous career, but he didn’t care at all about that anymore; he was earning between seven and eight thousand francs a year from journalism, where he was making a name for himself as a gossipy columnist and art critic. The noisy days of ‘The Drummer,’ churning out articles for a louis each, were far behind him. He was settling into a routine, writing for two popular newspapers, and even though, deep down, he remained a skeptical pleasure-seeker and worshipper of success at any cost, he was gaining recognition, and readers were starting to view his opinions as authoritative. Influenced by his family’s frugality, he was already investing money each month in small speculations known only to him, as his vices had never cost him less than they did now.
As he and Claude reached the Rue de Moscou, he told the painter that it was there that Irma Bécot now lived. ‘Oh! she is rolling in wealth,’ said he, ‘paying twenty thousand francs a year rent and talking of building a house which would cost half a million.’ Then suddenly pulling up he exclaimed: ‘Come, here we are! In with you, quick!’
As he and Claude arrived at Rue de Moscou, he told the painter that Irma Bécot lived there now. “Oh! She’s loaded,” he said, “paying twenty thousand francs a year in rent and thinking about building a house that would cost half a million.” Then, suddenly stopping, he exclaimed, “Come on, here we are! Get in quickly!”
But Claude still objected. His wife was waiting for him to lunch; he really couldn’t. And Jory was obliged to ring the bell, and then push him inside the hall, repeating that his excuse would not do; for they would send the valet to the Rue de Douai to tell his wife. A door opened and they found themselves face to face with Irma Bécot, who uttered a cry of surprise as soon as she perceived the painter.
But Claude still protested. His wife was waiting for him to have lunch; he really couldn’t go. And Jory had to ring the bell and then shove him into the hallway, insisting that his excuse wasn’t good enough; they would send the valet to Rue de Douai to inform his wife. A door opened, and they came face to face with Irma Bécot, who gasped in surprise as soon as she saw the painter.
‘What! is it you, savage?’ she said.
‘What! Is that you, savage?’ she said.
She made him feel at home at once by treating him like an old chum, and, in fact, he saw well enough that she did not even notice his old clothes. He himself was astonished, for he barely recognised her. In the course of four years she had become a different being; her head was ‘made up’ with all an actress’s skill, her brow hidden beneath a mass of curly hair, and her face elongated, by a sheer effort of will, no doubt. And from a pale blonde she had become flaringly carrotty; so that a Titianesque creature seemed to have sprung from the little urchin-like girl of former days. Her house, with all its show of luxury, still had its bald spots. What struck the painter were some good pictures on the walls, a Courbet, and, above all, an unfinished study by Delacroix. So this wild, wilful creature was not altogether a fool, although there was a frightful cat in coloured biscuit standing on a console in the drawing-room.
She instantly made him feel at home by treating him like an old friend, and he could tell she didn’t even notice his worn-out clothes. He was surprised because he hardly recognized her. Over four years, she had transformed completely; her hair was styled with all the flair of an actress, her brow concealed beneath a mass of curly locks, and her face elongated, likely through sheer effort. From a pale blonde, she had turned into a striking redhead, making her look like a vibrant beauty that emerged from the little tomboyish girl he once knew. Her house, while showcasing luxury, still had its bare spots. What caught the painter’s eye were some impressive paintings on the walls, a Courbet, and especially an unfinished study by Delacroix. So this wild, headstrong woman wasn’t completely clueless, even though there was a dreadful cat sculpture in colorful ceramic sitting on a console in the drawing room.
When Jory spoke of sending the valet to his friend’s place, she exclaimed in great surprise:
When Jory talked about sending the valet to his friend's house, she exclaimed in shock:
‘What! you are married?’
"Wait! You're married?"
‘Why, yes,’ said Claude, simply.
"Sure," said Claude, simply.
She glanced at Jory, who smiled; then she understood, and added:
She looked at Jory, who smiled; then she got it and added:
‘Ah! But why did people tell me that you were a woman-hater? I’m awfully vexed, you know. I frightened you, don’t you remember, eh? You still think me very ugly, don’t you? Well, well, we’ll talk about it all some other day.’
‘Ah! But why did people say you were a woman-hater? I’m really annoyed, you know. I scared you, remember? You still think I’m really unattractive, don’t you? Well, well, we’ll discuss it all another time.’
It was the coachman who went to the Rue de Douai with a note from Claude, for the valet had opened the door of the dining-room, to announce that lunch was served. The repast, a very delicate one, was partaken of in all propriety, under the icy stare of the servant. They talked about the great building works that were revolutionising Paris; and then discussed the price of land, like middle-class people with money to invest. But at dessert, when they were all three alone with the coffee and liqueurs, which they had decided upon taking there, without leaving the table, they gradually became animated, and dropped into their old familiar ways, as if they had met each other at the Café Baudequin.
It was the coachman who went to Rue de Douai with a note from Claude, as the valet had opened the dining room door to announce that lunch was ready. The meal, quite delicate, was enjoyed with all proper etiquette, under the cold gaze of the servant. They spoke about the major construction projects that were changing Paris, and then discussed land prices, like middle-class folks looking to invest. But at dessert, when they were all three alone with the coffee and liqueurs they had decided to enjoy at the table, they gradually became more lively and slipped back into their old familiar ways, as if they had met each other at Café Baudequin.
‘Ah, my lads,’ said Irma, ‘this is the only real enjoyment, to be jolly together and to snap one’s fingers at other people.’
‘Ah, my friends,’ said Irma, ‘this is the only true enjoyment, to have fun together and to not care about what others think.’
She was twisting cigarettes; she had just placed the bottle of chartreuse near her, and had begun to empty it, looking the while very flushed, and lapsing once more to her low street drollery.
She was rolling cigarettes; she had just set the bottle of chartreuse next to her and had started to pour it out, appearing quite flushed while slipping back into her playful street banter.
‘So,’ continued Jory, who was apologising for not having sent her that morning a book she wanted, ‘I was going to buy it last night at about ten o’clock, when I met Fagerolles—’
‘So,’ continued Jory, who was apologizing for not having sent her that morning a book she wanted, ‘I was going to buy it last night at around ten o’clock, when I ran into Fagerolles—’
‘You are telling a lie,’ said she, interrupting him in a clear voice. And to cut short his protestations—‘Fagerolles was here,’ she added, ‘so you see that you are telling a lie.’
‘You’re lying,’ she said, interrupting him with a clear voice. And to cut off his objections—‘Fagerolles was here,’ she added, ‘so you see that you’re lying.’
Then, turning to Claude, ‘No, it’s too disgusting. You can’t conceive what a liar he is. He tells lies like a woman, for the pleasure of it, for the merest trifle. Now, the whole of his story amounts simply to this: that he didn’t want to spend three francs to buy me that book. Each time he was to have sent me a bouquet, he had dropped it under the wheels of a carriage, or there were no flowers to be had in all Paris. Ah! there’s a fellow who only cares for himself, and no mistake.’
Then, turning to Claude, “No, it’s too awful. You can’t imagine what a liar he is. He lies like a woman, just for the fun of it, over the smallest things. Now, the whole of his story comes down to this: he didn’t want to spend three francs to buy me that book. Every time he was supposed to send me a bouquet, he either dropped it under the wheels of a carriage or claimed there were no flowers to be found in all of Paris. Ah! there’s a guy who only looks out for himself, no doubt about it.”
Jory, without getting in the least angry, tilted back his chair and sucked his cigar, merely saying with a sneer:
Jory, without getting the slightest bit angry, leaned back in his chair and took a puff of his cigar, simply saying with a smirk:
‘Oh! if you see Fagerolles now—’
‘Oh! if you see Fagerolles now—’
‘Well, what of it?’ she cried, becoming furious. ‘It’s no business of yours. I snap my fingers at your Fagerolles, do you hear? He knows very well that people don’t quarrel with me. We know each other; we sprouted in the same crack between the paving-stones. Look here, whenever I like, I have only to hold up my finger, and your Fagerolles will be there on the floor, licking my feet.’
‘So what?’ she shouted, getting angry. ‘It’s none of your business. I don’t care about your Fagerolles, you know? He knows perfectly well that nobody argues with me. We go way back; we grew up in the same gap between the pavement stones. Just so you know, whenever I want, all I have to do is lift my finger, and your Fagerolles will be right here on the floor, kissing my feet.’
She was growing animated, and Jory thought it prudent to beat a retreat.
She was getting excited, and Jory thought it was wise to back off.
‘My Fagerolles,’ he muttered; ‘my Fagerolles.’
‘My Fagerolles,’ he muttered; ‘my Fagerolles.’
‘Yes, your Fagerolles. Do you think that I don’t see through you both? He is always patting you on the back, as he hopes to get articles out of you, and you affect generosity and calculate the advantage you’ll derive if you write up an artist liked by the public.’
‘Yes, your Fagerolles. Do you think I don’t see right through you both? He’s always giving you praise, hoping to get articles from you, while you pretend to be generous and think about the benefits you’ll gain by writing about an artist that the public likes.’
This time Jory stuttered, feeling very much annoyed on account of Claude being there. He did not attempt to defend himself, however, preferring to turn the quarrel into a joke. Wasn’t she amusing, eh? when she blazed up like that, with her lustrous wicked eyes, and her twitching mouth, eager to indulge in vituperation?
This time Jory stuttered, feeling really annoyed because Claude was there. He didn’t try to defend himself, though, choosing instead to turn the argument into a joke. Wasn’t she funny, right? when she got all worked up like that, with her shiny wicked eyes and her twitching mouth, ready to dive into insults?
‘But remember, my dear, this sort of thing cracks your Titianesque “make-up,”’ he added.
‘But remember, my dear, this kind of thing ruins your Titianesque “makeup,”’ he added.
She began to laugh, mollified at once.
She started to laugh, immediately feeling better.
Claude, basking in physical comfort, kept on sipping small glasses of cognac one after another, without noticing it. During the two hours they had been there a kind of intoxication had stolen over them, the hallucinatory intoxication produced by liqueurs and tobacco smoke. They changed the conversation; the high prices that pictures were fetching came into question. Irma, who no longer spoke, kept a bit of extinguished cigarette between her lips, and fixed her eyes on the painter. At last she abruptly began to question him about his wife.
Claude, enjoying his comfort, kept sipping small glasses of cognac one after another, not even realizing it. During the two hours they had been there, a sort of drunkenness had taken over them, the dreamy buzz from liqueurs and tobacco smoke. They switched up the conversation; they began discussing the crazy prices that paintings were selling for. Irma, who was silent now, held a stub of a cigarette between her lips and stared at the painter. Finally, she suddenly started to ask him about his wife.
Her questions did not appear to surprise him; his ideas were going astray: ‘She had just come from the provinces,’ he said. ‘She was in a situation with a lady, and was a very good and honest girl.’
Her questions didn’t seem to catch him off guard; his thoughts were wandering: ‘She had just arrived from the countryside,’ he said. ‘She was working for a woman and was a really good and honest girl.’
‘Pretty?’
‘Cute?’
‘Why, yes, pretty.’
"Yes, very pretty."
For a moment Irma relapsed into her reverie, then she said, smiling: ‘Dash it all! How lucky you are!’
For a moment, Irma got lost in her thoughts, then she said, smiling: ‘Wow! You’re so lucky!’
Then she shook herself, and exclaimed, rising from the table: ‘Nearly three o’clock! Ah! my children, I must turn you out of the house. Yes, I have an appointment with an architect; I am going to see some ground near the Parc Monceau, you know, in the new quarter which is being built. I have scented a stroke of business in that direction.’
Then she shook herself and exclaimed, getting up from the table, “It’s almost three o’clock! Oh! my kids, I have to kick you out of the house. Yes, I have a meeting with an architect; I’m going to check out some land near Parc Monceau, you know, in the new neighborhood that’s being developed. I’ve caught wind of a business opportunity in that area.”
They had returned to the drawing-room. She stopped before a looking-glass, annoyed at seeing herself so flushed.
They had gone back to the living room. She paused in front of a mirror, frustrated at how red her face looked.
‘It’s about that house, isn’t it?’ asked Jory. ‘You have found the money, then?’
‘It’s about that house, right?’ Jory asked. ‘So you’ve found the money, then?’
She brought her hair down over her brow again, then with her hands seemed to efface the flush on her cheeks; elongated the oval of her face, and rearranged her tawny head, which had all the charm of a work of art; and finally, turning round, she merely threw Jory these words by way of reply: Look! there’s my Titianesque effect back again.’
She pulled her hair down over her forehead again, then with her hands seemed to wipe away the redness on her cheeks; she elongated her face and fixed her tan hair, which had the charm of a masterpiece; and finally, turning around, she simply tossed Jory these words in response: "Look! My Titianesque effect is back again."
She was already, amidst their laughter, edging them towards the hall, where once more, without speaking, she took Claude’s hands in her own, her glance yet again diving into the depths of his eyes. When he reached the street he felt uncomfortable. The cold air dissipated his intoxication; he remorsefully reproached himself for having spoken of Christine in that house, and swore to himself that he would never set foot there again.
She was already, amid their laughter, guiding them toward the hall, where once again, without saying a word, she took Claude’s hands in hers, her gaze once more diving deep into his eyes. When he stepped out onto the street, he felt uneasy. The cold air broke his high spirits; he felt regret for mentioning Christine in that place and promised himself that he would never go back there again.
Indeed, a kind of shame deterred Claude from going home, and when his companion, excited by the luncheon and feeling inclined to loaf about, spoke of going to shake hands with Bongrand, he was delighted with the idea, and both made their way to the Boulevard de Clichy.
Indeed, a sense of shame held Claude back from going home, and when his friend, energized by lunch and wanting to hang out, suggested they go and say hi to Bongrand, he was thrilled by the idea, and they both headed over to Boulevard de Clichy.
For the last twenty years Bongrand had there occupied a very large studio, in which he had in no wise sacrificed to the tastes of the day, to that magnificence of hangings and nick-nacks with which young painters were then beginning to surround themselves. It was the bare, greyish studio of the old style, exclusively ornamented with sketches by the master, which hung there unframed, and in close array like the votive offerings in a chapel. The only tokens of elegance consisted of a cheval glass, of the First Empire style, a large Norman wardrobe, and two arm-chairs upholstered in Utrecht velvet, and threadbare with usage. In one corner, too, a bearskin which had lost nearly all its hair covered a large couch. However, the artist had retained since his youthful days, which had been spent in the camp of the Romanticists, the habit of wearing a special costume, and it was in flowing trousers, in a dressing-gown secured at the waist by a silken cord, and with his head covered with a priest’s skull-cap, that he received his visitors.
For the last twenty years, Bongrand had occupied a very large studio there, where he hadn’t compromised on contemporary trends or the flashy decor that young artists were starting to embrace. It was a bare, grayish studio in the old style, decorated solely with his sketches, which hung unframed and closely like offerings in a chapel. The only touches of elegance were a cheval glass in the First Empire style, a large Norman wardrobe, and two armchairs upholstered in Utrecht velvet, worn down from use. In one corner, a bear skin that had mostly lost its hair covered a large couch. However, the artist had kept the habit from his younger days spent among the Romanticists of wearing a unique outfit, receiving his visitors in flowing trousers, a dressing gown cinched at the waist with a silk cord, and a priest’s skull-cap on his head.
He came to open the door himself, holding his palette and brushes.
He came to open the door himself, carrying his palette and brushes.
‘So here you are! It was a good idea of yours to come! I was thinking about you, my dear fellow. Yes, I don’t know who it was that told me of your return, but I said to myself that it wouldn’t be long before I saw you.’
‘So here you are! It was a great idea to come! I was thinking about you, my friend. Yes, I’m not sure who mentioned your return to me, but I told myself that it wouldn't be long before I saw you.’
The hand that he had free grasped Claude’s in a burst of sincere affection. He then shook Jory’s, adding:
The hand he had free grabbed Claude’s in a moment of genuine affection. He then shook Jory’s hand, adding:
‘And you, young pontiff; I read your last article, and thank you for your kind mention of myself. Come in, come in, both of you! You don’t disturb me; I’m taking advantage of the daylight to the very last minute, for there’s hardly time to do anything in this confounded month of November.’
‘And you, young pontiff; I read your last article, and I appreciate your kind mention of me. Come in, come in, both of you! You’re not bothering me; I’m making the most of the daylight until the very end, because there’s barely enough time to do anything in this annoying month of November.’
He had resumed his work, standing before his easel, on which there was a small canvas, which showed two women, mother and daughter, sitting sewing in the embrasure of a sunlit window. The young fellows stood looking behind him.
He had gone back to his work, standing in front of his easel, which held a small canvas depicting a mother and daughter sitting and sewing in the bright sunlight by the window. The young guys were standing behind him, watching.
‘Exquisite,’ murmured Claude, at last.
"Beautiful," murmured Claude, finally.
Bongrand shrugged his shoulders without turning round.
Bongrand shrugged his shoulders without turning around.
‘Pooh! A mere nothing at all. A fellow must occupy his time, eh? I did this from life at a friend’s house, and I am cleaning it a bit.’
‘Pooh! Just a little nothing. A person has to keep busy, right? I did this from life at a friend’s place, and I’m just tidying it up a bit.’
‘But it’s perfect—it is a little gem of truth and light,’ replied Claude, warming up. ‘And do you know, what overcomes me is its simplicity, its very simplicity.’
‘But it’s perfect—it’s a little gem of truth and light,’ replied Claude, getting more passionate. ‘And you know what really hits me? It’s how simple it is, its pure simplicity.’
On hearing this the painter stepped back and blinked his eyes, looking very much surprised.
On hearing this, the painter stepped back and blinked, looking quite surprised.
‘You think so? It really pleases you? Well, when you came in I was just thinking it was a foul bit of work. I give you my word, I was in the dumps, and felt convinced that I hadn’t a scrap of talent left.’
‘You think so? It really makes you happy? Well, when you walked in, I was just thinking it was a terrible piece of work. I promise you, I was feeling down and was convinced that I didn’t have any talent left.’
His hands shook, his stalwart frame trembled as with the agony of travail. He rid himself of his palette, and came back towards them, his arms sawing the air, as it were; and this artist, who had grown old amidst success, who was assured of ranking in the French School, cried to them:
His hands shook, and his sturdy body trembled as if in pain. He put down his palette and moved back toward them, his arms flailing through the air. This artist, who had grown old with success and was confident in his place in the French School, shouted at them:
‘It surprises you, eh? but there are days when I ask myself whether I shall be able to draw a nose correctly. Yes, with every one of my pictures I still feel the emotion of a beginner; my heart beats, anguish parches my mouth—in fact, I funk abominably. Ah! you youngsters, you think you know what funk means; but you haven’t as much as a notion of it, for if you fail with one work, you get quits by trying to do something better. Nobody is down upon you; whereas we, the veterans, who have given our measure, who are obliged to keep up to the level previously attained, if not to surpass it, we mustn’t weaken under penalty of rolling down into the common grave. And so, Mr. Celebrity, Mr. Great Artist, wear out your brains, consume yourself in striving to climb higher, still higher, ever higher, and if you happen to kick your heels on the summit, think yourself lucky! Wear your heels out in kicking them up as long as possible, and if you feel that you are declining, why, make an end of yourself by rolling down amid the death rattle of your talent, which is no longer suited to the period; roll down forgetful of such of your works as are destined to immortality, and in despair at your powerless efforts to create still further!’
‘Surprised, huh? Well, there are days when I wonder if I'll even be able to draw a nose correctly. Honestly, with every picture I create, I still feel like a beginner; my heart races, anxiety dries out my mouth—in other words, I’m terrified. Ah! You young people think you understand fear; but you don’t have a clue, because if you mess up one piece, you can redeem yourself by trying to create something better. Nobody is judging you; meanwhile, we, the experienced ones, who have already shown what we can do, are expected to maintain that standard or even exceed it. We can’t afford to falter or we risk plummeting into obscurity. So, Mr. Celebrity, Mr. Great Artist, exhaust yourself in your pursuit of greater heights, and if you find yourself on top, consider yourself fortunate! Spend as much time as you can celebrating that success, but if you start to feel yourself slipping, just face the reality that your talent is no longer relevant and accept your decline, casting aside any memories of the works that are meant to last forever, despairing at your inability to create anything new!’
His full voice had risen to a final outburst like thunder, and his broad flushed face wore an expression of anguish. He strode about, and continued, as if carried away, in spite of himself, by a violent whirlwind:
His loud voice had surged to a final shout like thunder, and his broad, flushed face showed an expression of pain. He walked around, continuing as if he were swept away, against his will, by a fierce whirlwind:
‘I have told you a score of times that one was for ever beginning one’s career afresh, that joy did not consist in having reached the summit, but in the climbing, in the gaiety of scaling the heights. Only, you don’t understand, you cannot understand; a man must have passed through it. Just remember! You hope for everything, you dream of everything; it is the hour of boundless illusions, and your legs are so strong that the most fatiguing roads seem short; you are consumed with such an appetite for glory, that the first petty successes fill your mouth with a delicious taste. What a feast it will be when you are able to gratify ambition to satiety! You have nearly reached that point, and you look right cheerfully on your scratches! Well, the thing is accomplished; the summit has been gained; it is now a question of remaining there. Then a life of abomination begins; you have exhausted intoxication, and you have discovered that it does not last long enough, that it is not worth the struggle it has cost, and that the dregs of the cup taste bitter. There is nothing left to be learnt, no new sensation to be felt; pride has had its allowance of fame; you know that you have produced your greatest works; and you are surprised that they did not bring keener enjoyment with them. From that moment the horizon becomes void; no fresh hope inflames you; there is nothing left but to die. And yet you still cling on, you won’t admit that it’s all up with you, you obstinately persist in trying to produce—just as old men cling to love with painful, ignoble efforts. Ah! a man ought to have the courage and the pride to strangle himself before his last masterpiece!’
‘I’ve told you countless times that you’re always starting your career over, that happiness isn’t about reaching the peak, but about the journey and the joy of climbing higher. But you don’t get it; you can’t understand—only someone who has experienced it knows. Just remember! You hope for everything, you dream big; it’s a time of limitless possibilities, and your legs are so strong that even the toughest paths feel short; you’re driven by a hunger for success, and the smallest achievements taste sweet. Just imagine how fulfilling it will be when you can fully satisfy your ambition! You’re almost there, and you look at your little setbacks with a smile! Well, you’ve done it; you’ve reached the top; now it’s about staying there. That’s when a miserable life starts; the high feels fleeting, and you realize it doesn’t last long enough, that it’s not worth the effort it took to get there, and the leftover feelings are bitter. There’s nothing new to learn, no fresh experiences to enjoy; your pride has had its share of recognition; you know you’ve created your best work, and you’re shocked that it didn’t bring greater joy. From that moment on, the future looks bleak; there’s no new hope to ignite your passion; all that’s left is to fade away. Yet, you still hold on, refusing to admit you’re done, stubbornly trying to create—just like old men cling to love with painful, embarrassing attempts. Ah! A person should have the courage and pride to end it before their last great work!’
While he spoke he seemed to have increased in stature, reaching to the elevated ceiling of the studio, and shaken by such keen emotion that the tears started to his eyes. And he dropped into a chair before his picture, asking with the anxious look of a beginner who has need of encouragement:
While he spoke, he looked taller, almost touching the high ceiling of the studio, and was so overcome with emotion that tears welled up in his eyes. He sat down in a chair in front of his painting, looking anxious like a beginner who needs some reassurance:
‘Then this really seems to you all right? I myself no longer dare to believe anything. My unhappiness springs from the possession of both too much and not enough critical acumen. The moment I begin a sketch I exalt it, then, if it’s not successful, I torture myself. It would be better not to know anything at all about it, like that brute Chambouvard, or else to see very clearly into the business and then give up painting.... Really now, you like this little canvas?’
‘So, you really think this is okay? I don’t dare to believe in anything anymore. My unhappiness comes from having both too much and not enough critical insight. As soon as I start a sketch, I get all excited about it, and then if it doesn’t turn out well, I punish myself. It would be better to not know anything at all about it, like that brute Chambouvard, or to see everything clearly and then just stop painting... So, do you actually like this little canvas?’
Claude and Jory remained motionless, astonished and embarrassed by those tokens of the intense anguish of art in its travail. Had they come at a moment of crisis, that this master thus groaned with pain, and consulted them like comrades? The worst was that they had been unable to disguise some hesitation when they found themselves under the gaze of the ardent, dilated eyes with which he implored them—eyes in which one could read the hidden fear of decline. They knew current rumours well enough; they agreed with the opinion that since his ‘Village Wedding’ the painter had produced nothing equal to that famous picture. Indeed, after maintaining something of that standard of excellence in a few works, he was now gliding into a more scientific, drier manner. Brightness of colour was vanishing; each work seemed to show a decline. However, these were things not to be said; so Claude, when he had recovered his composure, exclaimed:
Claude and Jory stood still, shocked and uneasy by the intensity of the artist’s emotional struggle. Had they arrived at a critical moment, witnessing their mentor’s pain as he turned to them for support? The worst part was that they couldn't hide their uncertainty when confronted with his intense, pleading gaze—eyes that reflected a deep fear of failure. They were well aware of the rumors circulating; they shared the view that since his "Village Wedding," the painter hadn’t created anything to match that iconic piece. In fact, after maintaining a high standard in a few subsequent works, he seemed to be shifting toward a more clinical, less vibrant style. The richness of his colors was fading, and each new piece appeared weaker than the last. Yet, these thoughts were better left unspoken; so once Claude regained his composure, he said:
‘You never painted anything so powerful!’
'You've never painted anything this powerful!'
Bongrand looked at him again, straight in the eyes. Then he turned to his work, in which he became absorbed, making a movement with his herculean arms, as if he were breaking every bone of them to lift that little canvas which was so very light. And he muttered to himself: ‘Confound it! how heavy it is! Never mind, I’ll die at it rather than show a falling-off.’
Bongrand looked at him again, right in the eyes. Then he turned back to his work, getting completely absorbed, making a movement with his powerful arms, as if he were breaking every bone in them to lift that small canvas which was so very light. And he muttered to himself: 'Damn it! how heavy it is! Never mind, I’d rather die than show any decline in my work.'
He took up his palette and grew calm at the first stroke of the brush, while bending his manly shoulders and broad neck, about which one noticed traces of peasant build remaining amid the bourgeois refinement contributed by the crossing of classes of which he was the outcome.
He picked up his palette and felt calm with the first stroke of the brush, while bending his strong shoulders and broad neck, where you could still see hints of his peasant background mixed in with the bourgeois sophistication that came from his mixed heritage.
Silence had ensued, but Jory, his eyes still fixed on the picture, asked:
Silence followed, but Jory, still staring at the picture, asked:
‘Is it sold?’
"Is it sold yet?"
Bongrand replied leisurely, like the artist who works when he likes without care of profit:
Bongrand replied casually, like an artist who creates when he wants, unconcerned about making money:
‘No; I feel paralysed when I’ve a dealer at my back.’ And, without pausing in his work, he went on talking, growing waggish.
‘No; I feel frozen when I have a dealer behind me.’ And, without stopping his work, he continued talking, becoming playful.
‘Ah! people are beginning to make a trade of painting now. Really and truly I have never seen such a thing before, old as I am getting. For instance, you, Mr. Amiable Journalist, what a quantity of flowers you fling to the young ones in that article in which you mentioned me! There were two or three youngsters spoken of who were simply geniuses, nothing less.’
‘Ah! People are starting to turn painting into a business now. Honestly, I’ve never seen anything like it, even as I get older. For example, you, Mr. Amiable Journalist, the way you praise the young ones in that article where you mentioned me! You talked about two or three youngsters who were nothing short of geniuses.’
Jory burst out laughing.
Jory laughed out loud.
‘Well, when a fellow has a paper, he must make use of it. Besides, the public likes to have great men discovered for it.’
‘Well, when someone has a paper, they have to use it. Plus, the public likes to see great individuals getting recognized for it.’
‘No doubt, public stupidity is boundless, and I am quite willing that you should trade on it. Only I remember the first starts that we old fellows had. Dash it! We were not spoiled like that, I can tell you. We had ten years’ labour and struggle before us ere we could impose on people a picture the size of your hand; whereas nowadays the first hobbledehoy who can stick a figure on its legs makes all the trumpets of publicity blare. And what kind of publicity is it? A hullabaloo from one end of France to the other, sudden reputations that shoot up of a night, and burst upon one like thunderbolts, amid the gaping of the throng. And I say nothing of the works themselves, those works announced with salvoes of artillery, awaited amid a delirium of impatience, maddening Paris for a week, and then falling into everlasting oblivion!’
‘No doubt, public ignorance is limitless, and I'm totally okay with you profiting from it. But I remember the early days for us old-timers. Honestly! We weren't pampered like that, I can tell you. We had ten years of hard work and struggle before we could impress people with something as small as the size of your hand; whereas nowadays, the first clueless kid who can draw a figure on its legs gets all the media hype. And what kind of hype is it? A commotion from one end of France to the other, sudden fame that appears overnight and hits you like a lightning bolt, leaving the crowd speechless. And I won’t even get into the works themselves, those creations announced with fanfare, anticipated amid a frenzy of excitement, driving Paris wild for a week, and then fading into complete oblivion!’
‘This is an indictment against journalism,’ said Jory, who had stretched himself on the couch and lighted another cigar. ‘There is a great deal to be said for and against it, but devil a bit, a man must keep pace with the times.’
‘This is an indictment against journalism,’ said Jory, who had sprawled on the couch and lit another cigar. ‘There are many arguments for and against it, but you have to keep up with the times.’
Bongrand shook his head, and then started off again, amid a tremendous burst of mirth:
Bongrand shook his head and then set off again, amidst a huge burst of laughter:
‘No! no! one can no longer throw off the merest daub without being hailed as a young “master.” Well, if you only knew how your young masters amuse me!’
‘No! no! you can’t just toss off the slightest piece of art without being called a young “master.” Well, if you only knew how your young masters make me laugh!’
But as if these words had led to some other ideas, he cooled down, and turned towards Claude to ask this question: ‘By the way, have you seen Fagerolles’ picture?’
But as if those words had sparked other thoughts, he calmed down and turned to Claude to ask this question: ‘By the way, have you seen Fagerolles’ picture?’
‘Yes,’ said the young fellow, quietly.
‘Yeah,’ said the young guy, quietly.
They both remained looking at each other: a restless smile had risen to their lips, and Bongrand eventually added:
They both kept staring at each other: a restless smile had appeared on their lips, and Bongrand finally said:
‘There’s a fellow who pillages you right and left.’
‘There’s a guy who robs you left and right.’
Jory, becoming embarrassed, had lowered his eyes, asking himself whether he should defend Fagerolles. He, no doubt, concluded that it would be profitable to do so, for he began to praise the picture of the actress in her dressing-room, an engraving of which was then attracting a great deal of notice in the print-shops. Was not the subject a really modern one? Was it not well painted, in the bright clear tone of the new school? A little more vigour might, perhaps, have been desirable; but every one ought to be left to his own temperament. And besides, refinement and charm were not so common by any means, nowadays.
Jory, feeling embarrassed, had looked down, wondering if he should defend Fagerolles. He eventually decided it would be smart to do so, as he started to compliment the painting of the actress in her dressing room, an engraving that was getting a lot of attention in the print shops. Wasn't the subject truly modern? Wasn't it painted well, with the bright, clear style of the new school? A little more energy might have been nice, but everyone should be true to their own temperament. Besides, refinement and charm aren't exactly common these days.
Bending over his canvas, Bongrand, who, as a rule, had nothing but paternal praise for the young ones, shook and made a visible effort to avoid an outburst. The explosion took place, however, in spite of himself.
Bending over his canvas, Bongrand, who usually had nothing but fatherly praise for the young artists, shook and visibly struggled to hold back an outburst. However, the explosion happened anyway, despite his efforts.
‘Just shut up, eh? about your Fagerolles! Do you think us greater fools than we really are? There! you see the great painter here present. Yes; I mean the young gentleman in front of you. Well, the whole trick consists in pilfering his originality, and dishing it up with the wishy-washy sauce of the School of Arts! Quite so! you select a modern subject, and you paint in the clear bright style, only you adhere to correctly commonplace drawing, to all the habitual pleasing style of composition—in short, to the formula which is taught over yonder for the pleasure of the middle-classes. And you souse all that with deftness, that execrable deftness of the fingers which would just as well carve cocoanuts, the flowing, pleasant deftness that begets success, and which ought to be punished with penal servitude, do you hear?’
“Just shut up about your Fagerolles! Do you think we're bigger fools than we are? There! You see the great painter here. Yes, I’m talking about the young gentleman in front of you. Well, the whole thing is about stealing his originality and serving it up with the bland sauce of the School of Arts! Exactly! You pick a modern subject, and you paint in a bright, clear style, but you stick to ordinary, everyday drawing, and all the usual pleasing composition techniques—in short, to the formula they teach over there for the enjoyment of the middle class. And you cover all that with a skillfulness, that awful skillfulness of the fingers that could just as easily carve coconuts, that smooth, pleasing skill that leads to success, and which should be punished with hard labor, understand?”
He brandished his palette and brushes aloft, in his clenched fists.
He held his palette and brushes up high in his clenched fists.
‘You are severe,’ said Claude, feeling embarrassed. ‘Fagerolles shows delicacy in his work.’
‘You are harsh,’ said Claude, feeling embarrassed. ‘Fagerolles demonstrates sensitivity in his work.’
‘I have been told,’ muttered Jory, mildly, ‘that he has just signed a very profitable agreement with Naudet.’
"I've been told," Jory said quietly, "that he just signed a really profitable deal with Naudet."
That name, thrown haphazard into the conversation, had the effect of once more soothing Bongrand, who repeated, shrugging his shoulders:
That name, casually mentioned in the conversation, had the effect of calming Bongrand again, who replied with a shrug:
‘Ah! Naudet—ah! Naudet.’
‘Oh! Naudet—oh! Naudet.’
And he greatly amused the young fellows by telling them about Naudet, with whom he was well acquainted. He was a dealer, who, for some few years, had been revolutionising the picture trade. There was nothing of the old fashion about his style—the greasy coat and keen taste of Papa Malgras, the watching for the pictures of beginners, bought at ten francs, to be resold at fifteen, all the little humdrum comedy of the connoisseur, turning up his nose at a coveted canvas in order to depreciate it, worshipping painting in his inmost heart, and earning a meagre living by quickly and prudently turning over his petty capital. No, no; the famous Naudet had the appearance of a nobleman, with a fancy-pattern jacket, a diamond pin in his scarf, and patent-leather boots; he was well pomaded and brushed, and lived in fine style, with a livery-stable carriage by the month, a stall at the opera, and his particular table at Bignon’s. And he showed himself wherever it was the correct thing to be seen. For the rest, he was a speculator, a Stock Exchange gambler, not caring one single rap about art. But he unfailingly scented success, he guessed what artist ought to be properly started, not the one who seemed likely to develop the genius of a great painter, furnishing food for discussion, but the one whose deceptive talent, set off by a pretended display of audacity, would command a premium in the market. And that was the way in which he revolutionised that market, giving the amateur of taste the cold shoulder, and only treating with the moneyed amateur, who knew nothing about art, but who bought a picture as he might buy a share at the Stock Exchange, either from vanity or with the hope that it would rise in value.
And he really entertained the young guys by sharing stories about Naudet, someone he knew well. Naudet was a dealer who, for a few years, had been changing the art world. His style was nothing like the old-school approach—the worn-out coat and sharp eye of Papa Malgras, waiting to buy beginner's paintings for ten francs and sell them for fifteen, the typical routine of a connoisseur who would turn up his nose at a desirable piece just to bring down its value, while secretly loving art and scraping by by flipping his tiny investments. No, Naudet was renowned for looking like a nobleman, sporting a stylish jacket, a diamond pin in his scarf, and shiny patent-leather boots; he was slicked back and well-groomed and lived large, with a rented carriage, a box at the opera, and his exclusive table at Bignon’s. He showed up wherever it was fashionable to be seen. Beyond that, he was a speculator, a Stock Exchange gambler, completely indifferent to art. But he had an instinct for success, able to identify which artist was worth backing—not the one who showed potential for great talent, sparking discussions, but the one whose misleading talent, coupled with a fake show of boldness, would be in demand. That was how he transformed the market, ignoring the true art lovers, and only dealing with wealthy buyers who didn’t know much about art but purchased a painting as if they were buying stocks—either out of vanity or hoping it would appreciate in value.
At this stage of the conversation Bongrand, very jocular by nature, and with a good deal of the mummer about him, began to enact the scene. Enter Naudet in Fagerolles’ studio.
At this point in the conversation, Bongrand, who was very playful by nature and had a bit of a theatrical flair, started to act out the scene. Enter Naudet in Fagerolles’ studio.
‘“You’ve real genius, my dear fellow. Your last picture is sold, then? For how much?”
‘“You really have talent, my friend. Did your last painting sell? For how much?”
‘“For five hundred francs.”
“For 500 francs.”
‘“But you must be mad; it was worth twelve hundred. And this one which you have by you—how much?”
‘“But you must be crazy; it was worth twelve hundred. And this one you have—how much?”’
‘“Well, my faith, I don’t know. Suppose we say twelve hundred?”
‘“Well, honestly, I’m not sure. How about we say twelve hundred?”’
‘“What are you talking about? Twelve hundred francs! You don’t understand me, then, my boy; it’s worth two thousand. I take it at two thousand. And from this day forward you must work for no one but myself—for me, Naudet. Good-bye, good-bye, my dear fellow; don’t overwork yourself—your fortune is made. I have taken it in hand.” Wherewith he goes off, taking the picture with him in his carriage. He trots it round among his amateurs, among whom he has spread the rumour that he has just discovered an extraordinary painter. One of the amateurs bites at last, and asks the price.
“what are you talking about? twelve hundred francs! you don’t get me, then, my friend; it’s worth two thousand. I’m taking it for two thousand. from now on, you have to work for no one but me—for me, Naudet. goodbye, goodbye, my dear fellow; don’t exhaust yourself—your fortune is made. I’ve got this covered.” With that, he leaves, taking the painting with him in his carriage. He shows it around to his art-loving friends, among whom he’s sparked a rumor that he’s just found an amazing painter. finally, one of the art enthusiasts bites and asks the price.
“‘Five thousand.”
“$5,000.”
‘“What, five thousand francs for the picture of a man whose name hasn’t the least notoriety? Are you playing the fool with me?”
“Five thousand francs for a picture of a guy whose name isn’t even known? Are you kidding me?”
‘“Look here, I’ll make you a proposal; I’ll sell it you for five thousand francs, and I’ll sign an agreement to take it back in a twelvemonth at six thousand, if you no longer care for it.”
‘“Listen, I have a proposal for you; I’ll sell it to you for five thousand francs, and I’ll sign an agreement to buy it back in a year for six thousand, if you don’t want it anymore.”’
Of course the amateur is tempted. What does he risk after all? In reality it’s a good speculation, and so he buys. After that Naudet loses no time, but disposes in a similar manner of nine or ten paintings by the same man during the course of the year. Vanity gets mingled with the hope of gain, the prices go up, the pictures get regularly quoted, so that when Naudet returns to see his amateur, the latter, instead of returning the picture, buys another one for eight thousand francs. And the prices continue to go up, and painting degenerates into something shady, a kind of gold mine situated on the heights of Montmartre, promoted by a number of bankers, and around which there is a constant battle of bank-notes.’
Of course, the amateur is tempted. What does he really have to lose? In reality, it's a smart investment, so he makes a purchase. After that, Naudet quickly sells off nine or ten paintings by the same artist throughout the year. Vanity mixes with the hope of profit, prices rise, and the paintings are consistently valued, so when Naudet returns to see his amateur, the latter, instead of giving back the painting, buys another one for eight thousand francs. And the prices just keep climbing, with painting turning into something dubious, like a gold mine on the slopes of Montmartre, backed by several banks, and surrounded by a constant struggle for cash.
Claude was growing indignant, but Jory thought it all very clever, when there came a knock at the door. Bongrand, who went to open it, uttered a cry of surprise.
Claude was getting angry, but Jory found it all very clever when there was a knock at the door. Bongrand, who went to open it, let out a cry of surprise.
‘Naudet, as I live! We were just talking about you.’
‘Naudet, I can’t believe it! We were just talking about you.’
Naudet, very correctly dressed, without a speck of mud on him, despite the horrible weather, bowed and came in with the reverential politeness of a man of society entering a church.
Naudet, impeccably dressed and completely clean despite the terrible weather, bowed and entered with the respectful politeness of a well-mannered person stepping into a church.
‘Very pleased—feel flattered, indeed, dear master. And you only spoke well of me, I’m sure of it.’
‘Very pleased—feel flattered, really, dear master. And I’m sure you only spoke well of me.’
‘Not at all, Naudet, not at all,’ said Bongrand, in a quiet tone. ‘We were saying that your manner of trading was giving us a nice generation of artists—tricksters crossed with dishonest business men.’
‘Not at all, Naudet, not at all,’ Bongrand said quietly. ‘We were just saying that your way of doing business is producing a new breed of artists—con artists mixed with shady businessmen.’
Naudet smiled, without losing his composure.
Naudet smiled, remaining calm.
‘The remark is harsh, but so charming! Never mind, never mind, dear master, nothing that you say offends me.’
‘The comment is harsh, but so delightful! It's okay, it's okay, dear master, nothing you say hurts my feelings.’
And, dropping into ecstasy before the picture of the two little women at needlework:
And, falling into a trance before the image of the two little women doing needlework:
‘Ah! Good heavens, I didn’t know this, it’s a little marvel! Ah! that light, that broad substantial treatment! One has to go back to Rembrandt for anything like it; yes, to Rembrandt! Look here, I only came in to pay my respects, but I thank my lucky star for having brought me here. Let us do a little bit of business. Let me have this gem. Anything you like to ask for it—I’ll cover it with gold.’
‘Ah! Good heavens, I didn’t know this, it’s a little marvel! Ah! that light, that broad substantial treatment! One has to go back to Rembrandt for anything like it; yes, to Rembrandt! Look here, I only came in to pay my respects, but I thank my lucky star for having brought me here. Let us do a little bit of business. Let me have this gem. Anything you like to ask for it—I’ll cover it with gold.’
One could see Bongrand’s back shake, as if his irritation were increasing at each sentence. He curtly interrupted the dealer.
One could see Bongrand’s back shake, as if his irritation grew with every sentence. He abruptly cut off the dealer.
‘Too late; it’s sold.’
"Too late; it's sold out."
‘Sold, you say. And you cannot annul your bargain? Tell me, at any rate, to whom it’s sold? I’ll do everything, I’ll give anything. Ah! What a horrible blow! Sold, are you quite sure of it? Suppose you were offered double the sum?’
‘Sold, you say. And you can’t cancel your deal? Tell me, at least, who it’s sold to? I’ll do anything, I’ll give anything. Ah! What a terrible shock! Sold, are you absolutely sure about that? What if someone offered you double the amount?’
‘It’s sold, Naudet. That’s enough, isn’t it?’
‘It’s sold, Naudet. That’s enough, right?’
However, the dealer went on lamenting. He remained for a few minutes longer, going into raptures before other sketches, while making the tour of the studio with the keen glances of a speculator in search of luck. When he realised that his time was badly chosen, and that he would be able to take nothing away with him, he went off, bowing with an air of gratitude, and repeating remarks of admiration as far as the landing.
However, the dealer kept complaining. He stayed for a few more minutes, admiring other sketches as he walked around the studio, eyeing everything like a gambler hoping for a win. When he realized that his timing was off and that he wouldn't be able to take anything with him, he left, bowing gratefully and repeating his compliments all the way to the landing.
As soon as he had gone, Jory, who had listened to the conversation with surprise, ventured to ask a question:
As soon as he left, Jory, who had listened to the conversation in surprise, dared to ask a question:
‘But you told us, I thought—It isn’t sold, is it?’
‘But you told us, I thought—It isn’t being sold, is it?’
Without immediately answering, Bongrand went back to his picture. Then, in his thundering voice, resuming in one cry all his hidden suffering, the whole of the nascent struggle within him which he dared not avow, he said:
Without answering right away, Bongrand returned to his painting. Then, in his booming voice, expressing in one outburst all his hidden pain, the entirety of the growing conflict within him he was too afraid to admit, he said:
‘He plagues me. He shall never have anything of mine! Let him go and buy of Fagerolles!’
‘He bothers me. He will never get anything from me! Let him go and buy from Fagerolles!’
A quarter of an hour later, Claude and Jory also said good-bye, leaving Bongrand struggling with his work in the waning daylight. Once outside, when the young painter had left his companion, he did not at once return home to the Rue de Douai, in spite of his long absence. He still felt the want of walking about, of surrendering himself up to that great city of Paris, where the meetings of one single day sufficed to fill his brain; and this need of motion made him wander about till the black night had fallen, through the frozen mud of the streets, beneath the gas-lamps, which, lighted up one by one, showed like nebulous stars amidst the fog.
A little while later, Claude and Jory said their goodbyes, leaving Bongrand struggling with his work in the fading light. Once outside, after the young painter parted ways with his friend, he didn’t head straight back to his place on Rue de Douai, even though he had been gone for a while. He still craved a stroll, wanting to immerse himself in the vast city of Paris, where just one day's encounters were enough to overwhelm his mind; this urge to move led him to roam around until darkness settled in, trudging through the icy muck of the streets, under the gas lamps that lit up one by one, appearing like hazy stars in the fog.
Claude impatiently awaited the Thursday when he was to dine at Sandoz’s, for the latter, immutable in his habits, still invited his cronies to dinner once a week. All those who chose could come, their covers were laid. His marriage, his change of life, the ardent literary struggle into which he had thrown himself, made no difference; he kept to his day ‘at home,’ that Thursday which dated from the time he had left college, from the time they had all smoked their first pipes. As he himself expressed it, alluding to his wife, there was only one chum more.
Claude was eagerly looking forward to the Thursday when he would have dinner at Sandoz’s place. Sandoz was set in his ways and continued to invite his friends over for dinner once a week. Anyone who wanted to could join; there were always extra places set at the table. His marriage, his new lifestyle, and the intense literary effort he had thrown himself into didn’t change this tradition; he still kept his Thursday ‘at home’ that he had maintained since leaving college, since the days when they all smoked their first pipes together. As he put it, referring to his wife, he now only had one more buddy.
‘I say, old man,’ he had frankly said to Claude, ‘I’m greatly worried—’
‘I say, dude,’ he had honestly said to Claude, ‘I’m really worried—’
‘What about?’
'What's up?'
‘Why, about inviting Madame Christine. There are a lot of idiots, a lot of philistines watching me, who would say all manner of things—’
‘Why, about inviting Madame Christine. There are a lot of fools, a lot of narrow-minded people watching me, who would say all kinds of things—’
‘You are quite right, old man. But Christine herself would decline to come. Oh! we understand the position very well. I’ll come alone, depend upon it.’
‘You’re absolutely right, my friend. But Christine wouldn’t agree to come. Oh! We totally get the situation. I’ll come by myself, count on it.’
At six o’clock, Claude started for Sandoz’s place in the Rue Nollet, in the depths of Batignolles, and he had no end of trouble in finding the small pavilion which his friend had rented. First of all he entered a large house facing the street, and applied to the doorkeeper, who made him cross three successive courtyards; then he went down a passage, between two other buildings, descended some steps, and tumbled upon the iron gate of a small garden. That was the spot, the pavilion was there at the end of a path. But it was so dark, and he had nearly broken his legs coming down the steps, that he dared not venture any further, the more so as a huge dog was barking furiously. At last he heard the voice of Sandoz, who was coming forward and trying to quiet the dog.
At six o’clock, Claude set off for Sandoz’s place on Rue Nollet, deep in Batignolles, and he had a lot of trouble finding the small pavilion his friend had rented. First, he entered a large building facing the street and asked the doorkeeper, who made him cross three different courtyards. Then he walked down a passage between two other buildings, went down some steps, and stumbled upon the iron gate of a small garden. That was the spot; the pavilion was at the end of a path. But it was so dark, and he nearly tripped coming down the steps, that he didn’t dare go any further, especially since a huge dog was barking loudly. Finally, he heard Sandoz’s voice coming forward to calm the dog down.
‘Ah, it’s you! We are quite in the country, aren’t we? We are going to set up a lantern, so that our company may not break their necks. Come in, come in! Will you hold your noise, you brute of a Bertrand? Don’t you see that it’s a friend, fool?’
‘Oh, it’s you! We’re really out in the countryside, aren’t we? We’re going to set up a lantern so our guests don’t hurt themselves. Come in, come in! Will you be quiet, you idiot Bertrand? Can’t you see it’s a friend, you fool?’
Thereupon the dog accompanied them as far as the pavilion, wagging his tail and barking joyously. A young servant-girl had come out with a lantern, which she fastened to the gate, in order to light up the breakneck steps. In the garden there was simply a small central lawn, on which there stood a large plum tree, diffusing a shade around that rotted the grass; and just in front of the low house, which showed only three windows, there stretched an arbour of Virginia creeper, with a brand-new seat shining there as an ornament amid the winter showers, pending the advent of the summer sun.
The dog followed them to the pavilion, wagging his tail and barking happily. A young maid came out with a lantern, which she hung by the gate to illuminate the steep steps. In the garden, there was just a small central lawn with a large plum tree that cast shade over the grass; right in front of the low house, which had only three windows, there was an arbor of Virginia creeper, featuring a brand-new seat that stood out as a decoration amidst the winter rains, waiting for the summer sun to arrive.
‘Come in,’ repeated Sandoz.
"Come in," Sandoz repeated.
On the right-hand side of the hall he ushered Claude into the parlour, which he had turned into a study. The dining-room and kitchen were on the left. Upstairs, his mother, who was now altogether bedridden, occupied the larger room, while he and his wife contented themselves with the other one, and a dressing-room that parted the two. That was the whole place, a real cardboard box, with rooms like little drawers separated by partitions as thin as paper. Withal, it was the abode of work and hope, vast in comparison with the ordinary garrets of youth, and already made bright by a beginning of comfort and luxury.
On the right side of the hall, he led Claude into the living room, which he had turned into a study. The dining room and kitchen were to the left. Upstairs, his mother, who was now completely bedridden, occupied the larger room, while he and his wife made do with the smaller one, along with a dressing room that separated the two. That was the entire place, a real cardboard box, with rooms like tiny drawers divided by walls as thin as paper. Still, it was a home filled with work and hope, vast compared to the usual youth's attics, and already brightened by a touch of comfort and luxury.
‘There’s room here, eh?’ he exclaimed. ‘Ah! it’s a jolly sight more comfortable than the Rue d’Enfer. You see that I’ve a room to myself. And I have bought myself an oaken writing-table, and my wife made me a present of that dwarf palm in that pot of old Rouen ware. Isn’t it swell, eh?’
‘There’s space here, right?’ he exclaimed. ‘Ah! it’s a whole lot more comfortable than the Rue d’Enfer. You see that I have my own room. And I bought myself an oak writing table, and my wife gave me that dwarf palm in that old Rouen pot as a gift. Isn’t it great, huh?’
His wife came in at that very moment. Tall, with a pleasant, tranquil face and beautiful brown hair, she wore a large white apron over her plainly made dress of black poplin; for although they had a regular servant, she saw to the cooking, for she was proud of certain of her dishes, and she put the household on a footing of middle-class cleanliness and love of cheer.
His wife walked in at that exact moment. She was tall, with a nice, calm face and beautiful brown hair. She wore a big white apron over her simple black dress; even though they had a regular housekeeper, she took care of the cooking herself because she was proud of some of her dishes, and she maintained a standard of middle-class cleanliness and warmth in the home.
She and Claude became old chums at once.
She and Claude became good friends right away.
‘Call him Claude, my darling. And you, old man, call her Henriette. No madame nor monsieur, or I shall fine you five sous each time.’
‘Call him Claude, sweetie. And you, old man, call her Henriette. No madame or monsieur, or I’ll fine you five sous every time.’
They laughed, and she scampered away, being wanted in the kitchen to look after a southern dish, a bouillabaisse, with which she wished to surprise the Plassans friend. She had obtained the recipe from her husband himself, and had become marvellously deft at it, so he said.
They laughed, and she ran off, needing to help in the kitchen with a southern dish, a bouillabaisse, that she wanted to surprise her friend from Plassans with. She had gotten the recipe from her husband, and he said she had become really good at making it.
‘Your wife is charming,’ said Claude, ‘and I see she spoils you.’
‘Your wife is lovely,’ said Claude, ‘and I can see she treats you really well.’
But Sandoz, seated at his table, with his elbows among such pages of the book he was working at as he had written that morning, began to talk of the first novel of his series, which he had published in October. Ah! they had treated his poor book nicely! It had been a throttling, a butchering, all the critics yelling at his heels, a broadside of imprecations, as if he had murdered people in a wood. He himself laughed at it, excited rather than otherwise, for he had sturdy shoulders and the quiet bearing of a toiler who knows what he’s after. Mere surprise remained to him at the profound lack of intelligence shown by those fellows the critics, whose articles, knocked off on the corner of some table, bespattered him with mud, without appearing as much as to guess at the least of his intentions. Everything was flung into the same slop-pail of abuse: his studies of physiological man; the important part he assigned to circumstances and surroundings; his allusions to nature, ever and ever creating; in short, life—entire, universal life—existent through all the animal world without there really being either high or low, beauty or ugliness; he was insulted, too, for his boldness of language for the conviction he expressed that all things ought to be said, that there are abominable expressions which become necessary, like branding irons, and that a language emerges enriched from such strength-giving baths. He easily granted their anger, but he would at least have liked them to do him the honour of understanding him and getting angry at his audacity, not at the idiotic, filthy designs of which he was accused.
But Sandoz, sitting at his table with his elbows resting on the pages of the book he was working on that morning, started talking about the first novel in his series, which he had published in October. Ah! They had really gone after his poor book! It felt like a strangling, a slaughter, with all the critics shouting after him, a barrage of curses, as if he had committed murder in the woods. He found it funny, excited rather than upset, because he had strong shoulders and a calm demeanor like a hardworking person who knows what they want. He was just surprised by the profound lack of understanding shown by those critics, whose articles, written hastily at some table, smeared him with insults without seeming to grasp even a hint of his intentions. Everything was thrown into the same garbage bin of criticism: his studies on physiological man; the significant role he attributed to circumstances and environment; his references to nature, constantly creating; in short, life—whole, universal life—existing throughout the animal kingdom without any real concept of high or low, beauty or ugliness; he was insulted, too, for his bold language and his belief that everything should be said, that there are terrible expressions that become necessary, like branding irons, and that language emerges enriched from such transformative experiences. He could easily accept their anger, but he would have at least liked them to honor him by understanding his point and being angry at his daring, not at the ridiculous and filthy accusations thrown at him.
‘Really,’ he continued, ‘I believe that the world still contains more idiots than downright spiteful people. They are enraged with me on account of the form I give to my productions, the written sentences, the similes, the very life of my style. Yes, the middle-classes fairly split with hatred of literature!’
‘Honestly,’ he continued, ‘I think the world still has way more clueless people than truly nasty ones. They’re furious with me because of the way I present my work—the written sentences, the comparisons, the very essence of my style. Yeah, the middle class is absolutely consumed with hatred for literature!’
Then he became silent, having grown sad.
Then he fell silent, feeling sad.
‘Never mind,’ said Claude, after an interval, ‘you are happy, you at least work, you produce—’
‘Never mind,’ said Claude, after a pause, ‘you’re happy, you at least work, you create—’
Sandoz had risen from his seat with a gesture of sudden pain.
Sandoz had stood up abruptly, wincing in sudden pain.
‘True, I work. I work out my books to their last pages—But if you only knew, if I told you amidst what discouragement, amidst what torture! Won’t those idiots take it into their heads to accuse me of pride! I, whom the imperfection of my work pursues even in my sleep—I, who never look over the pages of the day before, lest I should find them so execrable that I might afterwards lack the courage to continue. Oh, I work, no doubt, I work! I go on working, as I go on living, because I am born to it, but I am none the gayer on account of it. I am never satisfied; there is always a great collapse at the end.’
‘Sure, I work. I push through my books until the very last page — but if you only knew, if I could tell you what kind of discouragement and pain I go through! Won’t those fools just accuse me of being proud! I, who can’t escape the flaws in my work even in my dreams — I, who can’t bear to look back at yesterday’s pages for fear I’ll find them so awful that I won’t have the bravery to keep going. Oh, I work, no doubt about it. I keep on working just like I keep on living because it’s what I’m meant to do, but it doesn’t make me any happier. I’m never satisfied; there’s always a big letdown at the end.’
He was interrupted by a loud exclamation outside, and Jory appeared, delighted with life, and relating that he had just touched up an old article in order to have the evening to himself. Almost immediately afterwards Gagnière and Mahoudeau, who had met at the door, came in conversing together. The former, who had been absorbed for some months in a theory of colours, was explaining his system to the other.
He was interrupted by a loud shout outside, and Jory showed up, thrilled with life, sharing that he had just finished updating an old article to have the evening free. Almost right after, Gagnière and Mahoudeau, who had run into each other at the door, walked in chatting. Gagnière, who had been focused on a color theory for a few months, was explaining his system to Mahoudeau.
‘I paint my shade in,’ he continued, as if in a dream. ‘The red of the flag loses its brightness and becomes yellowish because it stands out against the blue of the sky, the complementary shade of which—orange—blends with red—’
‘I paint my shade in,’ he continued, as if he were dreaming. ‘The red of the flag fades and turns a bit yellow because it stands out against the blue sky, the complementary shade of which—orange—mixes with red—’
Claude, interested at once, was already questioning him when the servant brought in a telegram.
Claude, immediately intrigued, was already asking him questions when the servant entered with a telegram.
‘All right,’ said Sandoz, ‘it’s from Dubuche, who apologises; he promises to come and surprise us at about eleven o’clock.’
‘Okay,’ said Sandoz, ‘it’s from Dubuche, who apologizes; he promises to come and surprise us around eleven o’clock.’
At this moment Henriette threw the door wide open, and personally announced that dinner was ready. She had doffed her white apron, and cordially shook hands, as hostess, with all of them. ‘Take your seats! take your seats!’ was her cry. It was half-past seven already, the bouillabaisse could not wait. Jory, having observed that Fagerolles had sworn to him that he would come, they would not believe it. Fagerolles was getting ridiculous with his habit of aping the great artist overwhelmed with work!
At that moment, Henriette threw the door wide open and announced that dinner was ready. She had taken off her white apron and warmly shook hands with everyone as the hostess. “Take your seats! Take your seats!” was her shout. It was already half-past seven; the bouillabaisse couldn’t wait. Jory, having noticed that Fagerolles had promised him he would come, they just wouldn’t believe it. Fagerolles was becoming ridiculous with his habit of pretending to be the great artist buried in work!
The dining-room into which they passed was so small that, in order to make room for a piano, a kind of alcove had been made out of a dark closet which had formerly served for the accommodation of crockery. However, on grand occasions half a score of people still gathered round the table, under the white porcelain hanging lamp, but this was only accomplished by blocking up the sideboard, so that the servant could not even pass to take a plate from it. However, it was the mistress of the house who carved, while the master took his place facing her, against the blockaded sideboard, in order to hand round whatever things might be required.
The dining room they entered was so small that to make space for a piano, a sort of alcove was created from a dark closet that used to hold dishes. Still, on special occasions, around twenty people would gather around the table under the white porcelain hanging lamp, but this meant blocking the sideboard so that the servant couldn't even get by to grab a plate. It was the lady of the house who carved the food, while the lord of the house sat facing her, next to the blocked sideboard, to pass around whatever was needed.
Henriette had placed Claude on her right hand, Mahoudeau on her left, while Gagnière and Jory were seated next to Sandoz.
Henriette had Claude on her right, Mahoudeau on her left, while Gagnière and Jory were sitting next to Sandoz.
‘Françoise,’ she called, ‘give me the slices of toast. They are on the range.’
‘Françoise,’ she called, ‘pass me the slices of toast. They’re on the stove.’
And the girl having brought the toast, she distributed two slices to each of them, and was beginning to ladle the bouillabaisse into the plates, when the door opened once more.
And the girl, having brought the toast, gave two slices to each of them and started to serve the bouillabaisse into the plates when the door opened again.
‘Fagerolles at last!’ she said. ‘I have given your seat to Mahoudeau. Sit down there, next to Claude.’
‘Fagerolles, finally!’ she said. ‘I’ve given your seat to Mahoudeau. Sit down there, next to Claude.’
He apologised with an air of courtly politeness, by alleging a business appointment. Very elegantly dressed, tightly buttoned up in clothes of an English cut, he had the carriage of a man about town, relieved by the retention of a touch of artistic free-and-easiness. Immediately on sitting down he grasped his neighbour’s hand, affecting great delight.
He apologized with a touch of old-school politeness, claiming he had a business appointment. Dressed very elegantly in a tailored English suit, he carried himself like a city guy but still had a hint of artistic casualness. As soon as he sat down, he grabbed his neighbor’s hand, pretending to be really pleased.
‘Ah, my old Claude! I have for such a long time wanted to see you. A score of times I intended going after you into the country; but then, you know, circumstances—’
‘Ah, my old Claude! I've wanted to see you for such a long time. I've meant to go after you into the country a dozen times, but you know how things are—’
Claude, feeling uncomfortable at these protestations, endeavoured to meet them with a like cordiality. But Henriette, who was still serving, saved the situation by growing impatient.
Claude, feeling uneasy with these protests, tried to respond with similar friendliness. But Henriette, who was still serving, rescued the moment by becoming impatient.
‘Come, Fagerolles, just answer me. Do you wish two slices of toast?’
‘Come on, Fagerolles, just answer me. Do you want two slices of toast?’
‘Certainly, madame, two, if you please. I am very fond of bouillabaisse. Besides, yours is delicious, a marvel!’
‘Of course, ma'am, two please. I really love bouillabaisse. Plus, yours is amazing, a masterpiece!’
In fact, they all went into raptures over it, especially Jory and Mahoudeau, who declared they had never tasted anything better at Marseilles; so much so, that the young wife, delighted and still flushed with the heat of the kitchen, her ladle in her hand, had all she could do to refill the plates held out to her; and, indeed, she rose up and ran in person to the kitchen to fetch the remains of the soup, for the servant-girl was losing her wits.
In fact, they all went wild over it, especially Jory and Mahoudeau, who claimed they had never had anything better in Marseilles. The young wife, thrilled and still flushed from the heat of the kitchen, with her ladle in hand, struggled to keep up with refilling the plates being offered to her. She even got up and rushed into the kitchen to bring back the leftover soup, as the servant girl was losing her mind.
‘Come, eat something,’ said Sandoz to her. ‘We’ll wait well enough till you have done.’
‘Come on, eat something,’ Sandoz said to her. ‘We can wait until you’re done.’
But she was obstinate and remained standing.
But she was stubborn and stayed standing.
‘Never mind me. You had better pass the bread—yes, there, behind you on the sideboard. Jory prefers crumb, which he can soak in the soup.’
‘Don't worry about me. You should pass the bread—yeah, it's right behind you on the sideboard. Jory likes crumbs, which he can soak in the soup.’
Sandoz rose in his turn and assisted his wife, while the others chaffed Jory on his love for sops. And Claude, moved by the pleasant cordiality of his hosts, and awaking, as it were, from a long sleep, looked at them all, asking himself whether he had only left them on the previous night, or whether four years had really elapsed since he had dined with them one Thursday. They were different, however; he felt them to be changed: Mahoudeau soured by misery, Jory wrapt up in his own pleasures, Gagnière more distant, with his thoughts elsewhere. And it especially seemed to him that Fagerolles was chilly, in spite of his exaggerated cordiality of manner. No doubt their features had aged somewhat amid the wear and tear of life; but it was not only that which he noticed, it seemed to him also as if there was a void between them; he beheld them isolated and estranged from each other, although they were seated elbow to elbow in close array round the table. Then the surroundings were different; nowadays, a woman brought her charm to bear on them, and calmed them by her presence. Then why did he, face to face with the irrevocable current of things, which die and are renewed, experience that sensation of beginning something over again—why was it that he could have sworn that he had been seated at that same place only last Thursday? At last he thought he understood. It was Sandoz who had not changed, who remained as obstinate as regards his habits of friendship, as regards his habits of work, as radiant at being able to receive his friends at the board of his new home as he had formerly been, when sharing his frugal bachelor fare with them. A dream of eternal friendship made him changeless. Thursdays similar one to another followed and followed on until the furthest stages of their lives. All of them were eternally together, all started at the self-same hour, and participated in the same triumph!
Sandoz stood up to help his wife, while the others teased Jory about his love for sops. Claude, touched by the warm hospitality of his hosts and feeling as if he were waking up from a long sleep, looked around at them, wondering whether he had really only left them the night before or if four years had actually passed since he last dined with them one Thursday. They seemed different, though; he sensed they had changed: Mahoudeau was worn down by misery, Jory was wrapped up in his own pleasures, and Gagnière seemed more distant, lost in thought. It particularly struck him that Fagerolles felt cold, despite his overly friendly manner. Sure, their faces had aged a bit from life’s struggles, but it wasn’t just that—he felt there was an emptiness between them; he saw them as isolated and disconnected from each other, even as they sat closely around the table. The setting felt different too; now, a woman brought her charm to the group and soothed them with her presence. So why, faced with the unchangeable flow of life, which ends and begins anew, did he feel like he was starting something over again—why could he have sworn he had been sitting in that same spot just last Thursday? Finally, he thought he understood. It was Sandoz who hadn’t changed; he remained steadfast in his friendships and work habits, just as eager to host his friends at his new home as he had been when sharing his simple bachelor meals with them. A dream of eternal friendship kept him the same. Thursdays flowed into one another, repeating endlessly throughout their lives. They were all always together, starting at the same time, sharing in the same triumph!
Sandoz must have guessed the thought that kept Claude mute, for he said to him across the table, with his frank, youthful smile:
Sandoz must have sensed what was on Claude's mind, because he said to him across the table, with his open, youthful smile:
‘Well, old man, here you are again! Ah, confound it! we missed you sorely. But, you see, nothing is changed; we are all the same—aren’t we, all of you?’
‘Well, old man, here you are again! Ah, damn it! we missed you so much. But, you see, nothing has changed; we’re all the same—aren’t we, all of you?’
They answered by nodding their heads—no doubt, no doubt!
They responded by nodding their heads—definitely, definitely!
‘With this difference,’ he went on, beaming—‘with this difference, that the cookery is somewhat better than in the Rue d’Enfer! What a lot of messes I did make you swallow!’
‘With this difference,’ he continued, smiling—‘with this difference, that the food is a bit better than on Rue d’Enfer! What a lot of terrible dishes I made you eat!’
After the bouillabaisse there came a civet of hare; and a roast fowl and salad terminated the dinner. But they sat for a long time at table, and the dessert proved a protracted affair, although the conversation lacked the fever and violence of yore. Every one spoke of himself and ended by relapsing into silence on perceiving that the others did not listen to him. With the cheese, however, when they had tasted some burgundy, a sharp little growth, of which the young couple had ordered a cask out of the profits of Sandoz’s first novel, their voices rose to a higher key, and they all grew animated.
After the bouillabaisse, they had a civet of hare, and the dinner wrapped up with roast chicken and salad. They lingered at the table for quite a while, and dessert turned into a lengthy affair, though the conversation was less intense and passionate than before. Everyone talked about themselves and eventually fell silent when they noticed that the others weren’t really listening. However, with the cheese, after trying some burgundy, a sharp little wine that the young couple had ordered a cask of from the profits of Sandoz’s first novel, their voices picked up, and they all became more lively.
‘So you have made an arrangement with Naudet, eh?’ asked Mahoudeau, whose bony cheeks seemed to have grown yet more hollow. ‘Is it true that he guarantees you fifty thousand francs for the first year?’
‘So you’ve made a deal with Naudet, huh?’ asked Mahoudeau, whose bony cheeks looked even more sunken. ‘Is it true that he’s guaranteeing you fifty thousand francs for the first year?’
Fagerolles replied, with affected carelessness, ‘Yes, fifty thousand francs. But nothing is settled; I’m thinking it over. It is hard to engage oneself like that. I am not going to do anything precipitately.’
Fagerolles responded, pretending to be casual, ‘Yeah, fifty thousand francs. But nothing is final; I’m still considering it. It’s tough to commit like that. I’m not going to rush into anything.’
‘The deuce!’ muttered the sculptor; ‘you are hard to please. For twenty francs a day I’d sign whatever you like.’
‘The heck!’ muttered the sculptor; ‘you’re tough to please. For twenty francs a day, I’d sign whatever you want.’
They all now listened to Fagerolles, who posed as being wearied by his budding success. He still had the same good-looking, disturbing hussy-like face, but the fashion in which he wore his hair and the cut of his beard lent him an appearance of gravity. Although he still came at long intervals to Sandoz’s, he was separating from the band; he showed himself on the boulevards, frequented the cafés and newspaper offices—all the places where a man can advertise himself and make useful acquaintances. These were tactics of his own, a determination to carve his own victory apart from the others; the smart idea that if he wished to triumph he ought to have nothing more in common with those revolutionists, neither dealer, nor connections, nor habits. It was even said that he had interested the female element of two or three drawing-rooms in his success, not in Jory’s style, but like a vicious fellow who rises superior to his passions, and is content to adulate superannuated baronesses.
They were all now listening to Fagerolles, who acted like he was tired from his growing success. He still had the same striking, slightly provocative face, but the way he styled his hair and trimmed his beard gave him a serious look. Although he still occasionally visited Sandoz, he was distancing himself from the group; he was seen on the boulevards, hanging out at cafés and newspaper offices—all the places where a guy can promote himself and make valuable connections. These were his own strategies, a resolve to achieve his success independently from the others; the smart move was to think that if he wanted to succeed, he shouldn’t share anything with those revolutionaries, not even dealers, contacts, or habits. It was even rumored that he had caught the interest of the women in a couple of drawing rooms regarding his success, not in Jory’s way, but like a shameless guy who rises above his desires and is satisfied to flatter aging baronesses.
Just then Jory, in view of lending importance to himself, called Fagerolles’ attention to a recently published article; he pretended that he had made Fagerolles just as he pretended that he had made Claude. ‘I say, have you read that article of Vernier’s about yourself? There’s another fellow who repeats my ideas!’
Just then, Jory, wanting to make himself seem important, pointed out a recently published article to Fagerolles; he acted like he had created Fagerolles just like he claimed he had created Claude. “Hey, have you read that article by Vernier about you? There’s another guy who copies my ideas!”
‘Ah, he does get articles, and no mistake!’ sighed Mahoudeau.
‘Ah, he really does get articles, no doubt about it!’ sighed Mahoudeau.
Fagerolles made a careless gesture, but he smiled with secret contempt for all those poor beggars who were so utterly deficient in shrewdness that they clung, like simpletons, to their crude style, when it was so easy to conquer the crowd. Had it not sufficed for him to break with them, after pillaging them, to make his own fortune? He benefited by all the hatred that folks had against them; his pictures, of a softened, attenuated style, were held up in praise, so as to deal the death-blow to their ever obstinately violent works.
Fagerolles made a careless gesture, but he smiled with secret disdain for all those poor beggars who were so completely lacking in cleverness that they clung, like fools, to their outdated style, when it was so easy to win over the crowd. Had it not been enough for him to cut ties with them, after exploiting them, to make his own fortune? He profited from all the hatred that people had for them; his paintings, with a softer, lighter style, were praised as a way to deliver the final blow to their stubbornly aggressive works.
‘Have you read Vernier’s article?’ asked Jory of Gagnière. ‘Doesn’t he say exactly what I said?’
‘Have you read Vernier’s article?’ Jory asked Gagnière. ‘Doesn’t he say exactly what I said?’
For the last few moments Gagnière had been absorbed in contemplating his glass, the wine in which cast a ruddy reflection on the white tablecloth. He started:
For the last few moments, Gagnière had been focused on his glass, the wine casting a reddish reflection on the white tablecloth. He jolted:
‘Eh, what, Vernier’s article?’
“Hey, what about Vernier’s article?”
‘Why, yes; in fact, all those articles which appear about Fagerolles.’
‘Yeah, actually, all those articles that come out about Fagerolles.’
Gagnière in amazement turned to the painter.
Gagnière turned to the painter in disbelief.
‘What, are they writing articles about you? I know nothing about them, I haven’t seen them. Ah! they are writing articles about you, but whatever for?’
‘What, are they writing articles about you? I don’t know anything about them; I haven’t seen them. Ah! They are writing articles about you, but why?’
There was a mad roar of laughter. Fagerolles alone grinned with an ill grace, for he fancied himself the butt of some spiteful joke. But Gagnière spoke in absolute good faith. He felt surprised at the success of a painter who did not even observe the laws regulating the value of tints. Success for that trickster! Never! For in that case what would become of conscientiousness?
There was a wild burst of laughter. Fagerolles alone smiled awkwardly, thinking he was the target of some mean-spirited joke. But Gagnière was completely sincere. He was surprised at the success of a painter who didn’t even follow the rules about color values. Success for that fraud! Never! If that were the case, what would happen to integrity?
This boisterous hilarity enlivened the end of the dinner. They all left off eating, though the mistress of the house still insisted upon filling their plates.
This loud laughter brightened the end of the dinner. They all stopped eating, even though the hostess kept insisting on filling their plates.
‘My dear, do attend to them,’ she kept saying to Sandoz, who had grown greatly excited amidst the din. ‘Just stretch out your hand; the biscuits are on the side-board.’
‘My dear, please pay attention to them,’ she kept saying to Sandoz, who had become quite excited amidst the noise. ‘Just reach out your hand; the biscuits are on the sideboard.’
They all declined anything more, and rose up. As the rest of the evening was to be spent there, round the table, drinking tea, they leaned back against the walls and continued chatting while the servant cleared away. The young couple assisted, Henriette putting the salt-cellars in a drawer, and Sandoz helping to fold the cloth.
They all turned down anything else and stood up. Since the rest of the evening was going to be spent there, around the table, drinking tea, they leaned back against the walls and kept chatting while the server cleaned up. The young couple pitched in, with Henriette putting the salt shakers in a drawer and Sandoz helping to fold the tablecloth.
‘You can smoke,’ said Henriette. ‘You know that it doesn’t inconvenience me in the least.’
‘You can smoke,’ said Henriette. ‘You know it doesn’t bother me at all.’
Fagerolles, who had drawn Claude into the window recess, offered him a cigar, which was declined.
Fagerolles, who had pulled Claude into the window nook, offered him a cigar, which he declined.
‘True, I forgot; you don’t smoke. Ah! I say, I must go to see what you have brought back with you. Some very interesting things, no doubt. You know what I think of your talent. You are the cleverest of us all.’
‘True, I forgot; you don’t smoke. Ah! I say, I must go see what you’ve brought back with you. Some really interesting things, no doubt. You know what I think of your talent. You’re the smartest of us all.’
He showed himself very humble, sincere at heart, and allowing his admiration of former days to rise once more to the surface; indeed, he for ever bore the imprint of another’s genius, which he admitted, despite the complex calculations of his cunning mind. But his humility was mingled with a certain embarrassment very rare with him—the concern he felt at the silence which the master of his youth preserved respecting his last picture. At last he ventured to ask, with quivering lips:
He presented himself as very humble, truly sincere, and allowed his admiration for the past to come to the forefront once again; in fact, he always carried the mark of someone else's brilliance, which he acknowledged, despite the elaborate reasoning of his clever mind. However, his humility was mixed with a certain embarrassment that was unusual for him—the worry he experienced due to the silence that the mentor of his youth maintained about his latest painting. Finally, he dared to ask, his lips trembling:
‘Did you see my actress at the Salon? Do you like it? Tell me candidly.’
‘Did you see my actress at the salon? Do you like her? Tell me honestly.’
Claude hesitated for a moment; then, like the good-natured fellow he was, said:
Claude paused for a moment; then, being the good-natured guy he was, said:
‘Yes; there are some very good bits in it.’
‘Yeah; there are some really good parts in it.’
Fagerolles already repented having asked that stupid question, and he ended by altogether floundering; he tried to excuse himself for his plagiarisms and his compromises. When with great difficulty he had got out of the mess, enraged with himself for his clumsiness, he for a moment became the joker of yore again, made even Claude laugh till he cried, and amused them all. At last he held out his hand to take leave of Henriette.
Fagerolles already regretted asking that dumb question, and he ended up completely stumbling over his words; he tried to justify his copying and compromises. After struggling to get out of the mess, furious with himself for being awkward, he briefly became the jokester he once was, making even Claude laugh until he cried and entertaining everyone. Finally, he reached out his hand to say goodbye to Henriette.
‘What, going so soon?’
‘What, leaving so soon?’
‘Alas! yes, dear madame. This evening my father is entertaining the head of a department at one of the ministries, an official whom he’s trying to influence in view of obtaining a decoration; and, as I am one of his titles to that distinction, I had to promise that I would look in.’
‘Alas! Yes, dear madam. Tonight my father is hosting the head of a department at one of the ministries, an official he’s trying to sway to get a decoration; and since I’m one of his credentials for that honor, I had to promise that I would stop by.’
When he was gone, Henriette, who had exchanged a few words in a low voice with Sandoz, disappeared; and her light footfall was heard on the first floor. Since her marriage it was she who tended the old, infirm mother, absenting herself in this fashion several times during the evening, just as the son had done formerly.
When he left, Henriette, who had exchanged a few quiet words with Sandoz, slipped away; her light footsteps were heard on the first floor. Since getting married, she had been the one taking care of her elderly, frail mother, stepping away like her son used to do several times during the evening.
Not one of the guests, however, had noticed her leave the room. Mahoudeau and Gagnière were now talking about Fagerolles; showing themselves covertly bitter, without openly attacking him. As yet they contented themselves with ironical glances and shrugs of the shoulders—all the silent contempt of fellows who don’t wish to slash a chum. Then they fell back on Claude; they prostrated themselves before him, overwhelmed him with the hopes they set in him. Ah! it was high time for him to come back, for he alone, with his great gifts, his vigorous touch, could become the master, the recognised chief. Since the Salon of the Rejected the ‘school of the open air’ had increased in numbers; a growing influence was making itself felt; but unfortunately, the efforts were frittered away; the new recruits contented themselves with producing sketches, impressions thrown off with a few strokes of the brush; they were awaiting the necessary man of genius, the one who would incarnate the new formula in masterpieces. What a position to take! to master the multitude, to open up a century, to create a new art! Claude listened to them, with his eyes turned to the floor and his face very pale. Yes, that indeed was his unavowed dream, the ambition he dared not confess to himself. Only, with the delight that the flattery caused him, there was mingled a strange anguish, a dread of the future, as he heard them raising him to the position of dictator, as if he had already triumphed.
Not one of the guests noticed her leave the room. Mahoudeau and Gagnière were now talking about Fagerolles, showing their bitterness without directly attacking him. For now, they were content with ironic glances and shrugs—silent contempt from guys who didn’t want to lash out at a friend. Then they turned to Claude, practically worshipping him, overflowing with the hopes they had for him. It was definitely time for him to return because he alone, with his immense talent and strong style, could become the master, the recognized leader. Since the Salon of the Rejected, the 'school of the open air' had grown in numbers; a rising influence was being felt. Unfortunately, their efforts were getting scattered; the newcomers were just producing sketches, quick impressions made with a few brushstrokes; they were waiting for the genius who would embody the new approach in masterpieces. What a role to take on! to lead the crowd, to open a new era, to create a new art! Claude listened to them, his eyes on the floor and his face pale. Yes, that was indeed his hidden dream, the ambition he wouldn’t even admit to himself. Yet, along with the pleasure the flattery brought him, a strange anxiety mixed in, a fear of the future, as he heard them elevating him to the role of dictator, as if he had already achieved victory.
‘Don’t,’ he exclaimed at last; ‘there are others as good as myself. I am still seeking my real line.’
‘Don’t,’ he said finally; ‘there are others just as good as me. I’m still looking for my true calling.’
Jory, who felt annoyed, was smoking in silence. Suddenly, as the others obstinately kept at it, he could not refrain from remarking:
Jory, feeling annoyed, was smoking in silence. Suddenly, as the others stubbornly continued, he couldn't help but say:
‘All this, my boys, is because you are vexed at Fagerolles’ success.’
‘All this, guys, is because you’re annoyed at Fagerolles’ success.’
They energetically denied it; they burst out in protestations. Fagerolles, the young master! What a good joke!
They vigorously denied it; they erupted in protests. Fagerolles, the young master! What a great joke!
‘Oh, you are turning your back upon us, we know it,’ said Mahoudeau. ‘There’s no fear of your writing a line about us nowadays.’
‘Oh, you’re turning your back on us, we know it,’ said Mahoudeau. ‘You’re not worried about writing a single line about us these days.’
‘Well, my dear fellow,’ answered Jory, vexed, ‘everything I write about you is cut out. You make yourselves hated everywhere. Ah! if I had a paper of my own!’
‘Well, my dear friend,’ Jory replied, annoyed, ‘everything I write about you gets censored. You make yourselves disliked everywhere. Ah! if I only had my own publication!’
Henriette came back, and Sandoz’s eyes having sought hers, she answered him with a glance and the same affectionate, quiet smile that he had shown when leaving his mother’s room in former times. Then she summoned them all. They sat down again round the table while she made the tea and poured it out. But the gathering grew sad, benumbed, as it were, with lassitude. Sandoz vainly tried a diversion by admitting Bertrand, the big dog, who grovelled at sight of the sugar-basin, and ended by going to sleep near the stove, where he snored like a man. Since the discussion on Fagerolles there had been intervals of silence, a kind of bored irritation, which fell heavily upon them amidst the dense tobacco smoke. And, in fact, Gagnière felt so out of sorts that he left the table for a moment to seat himself at the piano, murdering some passages from Wagner in a subdued key, with the stiff fingers of an amateur who tries his first scale at thirty.
Henriette returned, and when Sandoz’s eyes found hers, she replied with a glance and the same affectionate, soft smile he had given when leaving his mother’s room in the past. Then she called everyone over. They took their seats again around the table while she made and served the tea. However, the atmosphere became sad and kind of sluggish. Sandoz tried to lighten things up by bringing in Bertrand, the big dog, who immediately went after the sugar bowl, then settled down by the stove and snored like a man. Since the discussion about Fagerolles, there had been awkward silences, a sort of irritable boredom that hung over them in the thick tobacco smoke. In fact, Gagnière felt so out of sorts that he left the table for a moment and sat down at the piano, struggling through some sections of Wagner in a low key, with the clumsy fingers of a beginner trying to play his first scale at thirty.
Towards eleven o’clock Dubuche, arriving at last, contributed the finishing touch to the general frost. He had made his escape from a ball to fulfil what he considered a remaining duty towards his old comrades; and his dress-coat, his white necktie, his fat, pale face, all proclaimed his vexation at having come, the importance he attached to the sacrifice, and the fear he felt of compromising his new position. He avoided mentioning his wife, so that he might not have to bring her to Sandoz’s. When he had shaken hands with Claude, without showing more emotion than if he had met him the day before, he declined a cup of tea and spoke slowly—puffing out his cheeks the while—of his worry in settling in a brand-new house, and of the work that had overwhelmed him since he had attended to the business of his father-in-law, who was building a whole street near the Parc Monceau.
Towards eleven o’clock, Dubuche finally arrived, adding the final touch to the overall chill. He had made his escape from a party to fulfill what he felt was his remaining obligation to his old friends. His formal coat, white tie, and plump, pale face all showed his annoyance at having come, the importance he placed on the sacrifice, and his fear of jeopardizing his new position. He avoided mentioning his wife so he wouldn’t have to bring her to Sandoz’s. After shaking hands with Claude, without showing more emotion than if they had met the day before, he declined a cup of tea and spoke slowly—puffing out his cheeks as he talked—about his worries settling into a brand-new house and the overwhelming work he had since taking care of his father-in-law's business, who was constructing an entire street near Parc Monceau.
Then Claude distinctly felt that something had snapped. Had life then already carried away the evenings of former days, those evenings so fraternal in their very violence, when nothing had as yet separated them, when not one of them had thought of keeping his part of glory to himself? Nowadays the battle was beginning. Each hungry one was eagerly biting. And a fissure was there, a scarcely perceptible crack that had rent the old, sworn friendships, and some day would make them crumble into a thousand pieces.
Then Claude clearly felt that something had broken. Had life really taken away the evenings of the past, those evenings so brotherly in their intensity, when nothing had yet come between them, when none of them had thought about hoarding their share of glory? These days, the battle was starting. Each person was eagerly trying to get their piece. And there was a rift, a barely noticeable crack that had torn apart the old, sworn friendships, and someday would cause them to fall apart completely.
However, Sandoz, with his craving for perpetuity, had so far noticed nothing; he still beheld them as they had been in the Rue d’Enfer, all arm in arm, starting off to victory. Why change what was well? Did not happiness consist in one pleasure selected from among all, and then enjoyed for ever afterwards? And when, an hour later, the others made up their minds to go off, wearied by the dull egotism of Dubuche, who had not left off talking about his own affairs; when they had dragged Gagnière, in a trance, away from the piano, Sandoz, followed by his wife, absolutely insisted, despite the coldness of the night, on accompanying them all to the gate at the end of the garden. He shook hands all round, and shouted after them:
However, Sandoz, eager for permanence, hadn’t noticed anything yet; he still saw them as they had been on Rue d’Enfer, all linked arm in arm, setting out for victory. Why change what was good? Didn't happiness come from choosing one pleasure among many and then enjoying it forever? And when, an hour later, the others decided to leave, tired of Dubuche’s tedious self-absorption, who wouldn’t stop talking about his own issues; when they had pulled Gagnière, who was lost in thought, away from the piano, Sandoz, followed by his wife, insisted on escorting them all to the gate at the end of the garden, despite the chilly night. He shook hands with everyone and called out after them:
‘Till Thursday, Claude; till next Thursday, all of you, eh? Mind you all come!’
‘Until Thursday, Claude; until next Thursday, all of you, right? Make sure you all come!’
‘Till Thursday!’ repeated Henriette, who had taken the lantern and was holding it aloft so as to light the steps.
“Until Thursday!” repeated Henriette, who had grabbed the lantern and was holding it up to light the steps.
And, amid the laughter, Gagnière and Mahoudeau replied, jokingly: ‘Till Thursday, young master! Good-night, young master!’
And, among the laughter, Gagnière and Mahoudeau responded playfully: ‘See you Thursday, young master! Good night, young master!’
Once in the Rue Nollet, Dubuche immediately hailed a cab, in which he drove away. The other four walked together as far as the outer boulevards, scarcely exchanging a word, looking dazed, as it were, at having been in each other’s company so long. At last Jory decamped, pretending that some proofs were waiting for him at the office of his newspaper. Then Gagnière mechanically stopped Claude in front of the Café Baudequin, the gas of which was still blazing away. Mahoudeau refused to go in, and went off alone, sadly ruminating, towards the Rue du Cherche-Midi.
Once they were on Rue Nollet, Dubuche quickly called a cab and took off. The other four walked together as far as the outer boulevards, hardly saying a word, looking stunned to have spent so much time together. Eventually, Jory left, claiming that he had some proofs waiting for him at his newspaper office. Then Gagnière automatically stopped Claude in front of Café Baudequin, where the gas lights were still shining bright. Mahoudeau declined to join them and walked away alone, sadly thinking about things as he headed toward Rue du Cherche-Midi.
Without knowing how, Claude found himself seated at their old table, opposite Gagnière, who was silent. The café had not changed. The friends still met there of a Sunday, showing a deal of fervour, in fact, since Sandoz had lived in the neighbourhood; but the band was now lost amid a flood of new-comers; it was slowly being submerged by the increasing triteness of the young disciples of the ‘open air.’ At that hour of night, however, the establishment was getting empty. Three young painters, whom Claude did not know, came to shake hands with him as they went off; and then there merely remained a petty retired tradesman of the neighbourhood, asleep in front of a saucer.
Without knowing how, Claude found himself sitting at their old table, across from Gagnière, who was quiet. The café hadn’t changed. The friends still met there on Sundays, actually with even more enthusiasm since Sandoz had moved to the area; but the group was now lost among a flood of newcomers and was slowly being overwhelmed by the increasing boredom of the young followers of the ‘open air.’ At that time of night, however, the place was starting to empty out. Three young painters, whom Claude didn’t know, came to shake hands with him as they left; and then only a petty retired tradesman from the neighborhood remained, asleep in front of a saucer.
Gagnière, quite at his ease, as if he had been at home, absolutely indifferent to the yawns of the solitary waiter, who was stretching his arms, glanced towards Claude, but without seeing him, for his eyes were dim.
Gagnière, completely relaxed as if he were at home, totally unconcerned about the yawns of the lone waiter who was stretching his arms, glanced in Claude's direction, but didn’t actually see him since his eyesight was blurred.
‘By the way,’ said the latter, ‘what were you explaining to Mahoudeau this evening? Yes, about the red of a flag turning yellowish amid the blue of the sky. That was it, eh? You are studying the theory of complementary colours.’
‘By the way,’ said the latter, ‘what were you explaining to Mahoudeau this evening? Yes, about the red of a flag turning yellowish against the blue of the sky. That was it, right? You’re studying the theory of complementary colors.’
But the other did not answer. He took up his glass of beer, set it down again without tasting its contents, and with an ecstatic smile ended by muttering:
But the other didn’t respond. He picked up his glass of beer, put it down again without tasting it, and with a blissful smile finally muttered:
‘Haydn has all the gracefulness of a rhetorician—his is a gentle music, quivering like the voice of a great-grandmother in powdered hair. Mozart, he’s the precursory genius—the first who endowed an orchestra with an individual voice; and those two will live mostly because they created Beethoven. Ah, Beethoven! power and strength amidst serene suffering, Michael Angelo at the tomb of the Medici! A heroic logician, a kneader of human brains; for the symphony, with choral accompaniments, was the starting-point of all the great ones of to-day!’
‘Haydn has all the elegance of a skilled speaker—his music is soft and trembles like the voice of a great-grandmother with powdered hair. Mozart is the groundbreaking genius—the first to give an orchestra a unique voice; and those two will be remembered mainly because they inspired Beethoven. Ah, Beethoven! strength and power amidst calm pain, like Michelangelo at the tomb of the Medici! A heroic thinker, a molder of human minds; for the symphony, with choral support, was the foundation for all the great artists of today!’
The waiter, tired of waiting, began to turn off the gas, wearily dragging his feet along as he did so. Mournfulness pervaded the deserted room, dirty with saliva and cigar ends, and reeking of spilt drink; while from the hushed boulevard the only sound that came was the distant blubbering of some drunkard.
The waiter, exhausted from waiting, started to turn off the gas, dragging his feet as he did so. A sense of sadness filled the empty room, which was dirty with spit and cigar butts and smelled of spilled drinks; from the quiet boulevard came the faint sound of a drunken person crying.
Gagnière, still in the clouds, however, continued to ride his hobby-horse.
Gagnière, still daydreaming, kept riding his hobby-horse.
‘Weber passes by us amid a romantic landscape, conducting the ballads of the dead amidst weeping willows and oaks with twisted branches. Schumann follows him, beneath the pale moonlight, along the shores of silvery lakes. And behold, here comes Rossini, incarnation of the musical gift, so gay, so natural, without the least concern for expression, caring nothing for the public, and who isn’t my man by a long way—ah! certainly not—but then, all the same, he astonishes one by his wealth of production, and the huge effects he derives from an accumulation of voices and an ever-swelling repetition of the same strain. These three led to Meyerbeer, a cunning fellow who profited by everything, introducing symphony into opera after Weber, and giving dramatic expression to the unconscious formulas of Rossini. Oh! the superb bursts of sound, the feudal pomp, the martial mysticism, the quivering of fantastic legends, the cry of passion ringing out through history! And such finds!—each instrument endowed with a personality, the dramatic recitatives accompanied symphoniously by the orchestra—the typical musical phrase on which an entire work is built! Ah! he was a great fellow—a very great fellow indeed!’
‘Weber walks by us in a romantic landscape, conducting the ballads of the dead amidst weeping willows and twisted oaks. Schumann follows him, under the pale moonlight, along the shores of shimmering lakes. And look, here comes Rossini, the embodiment of musical talent, so joyful, so natural, without a care for expression, indifferent to the audience, and not really my type—oh, definitely not—but still, he amazes with his prolific output and the huge effects he creates from layers of voices and an increasing repetition of the same melody. These three paved the way for Meyerbeer, a clever guy who took advantage of everything, bringing symphony into opera after Weber, and giving dramatic expression to Rossini's instinctive formulas. Oh! the incredible bursts of sound, the grandeur, the martial mysticism, the thrill of fantastical legends, the outcry of passion echoing through history! And what discoveries!—every instrument with its own personality, the dramatic recitatives harmoniously supported by the orchestra—the defining musical phrase that an entire piece is built around! Ah! he was a remarkable guy—a truly remarkable guy indeed!’
‘I am going to shut up, sir,’ said the waiter, drawing near.
‘I’m going to be quiet now, sir,’ said the waiter, coming closer.
And, seeing that Gagnière did not as much as look round, he went to awaken the petty retired tradesman, who was still dozing in front of his saucer.
And, noticing that Gagnière didn’t even glance over, he went to wake up the little retired businessman who was still napping in front of his saucer.
‘I am going to shut up, sir.’
‘I’m going to be quiet, sir.’
The belated customer rose up, shivering, fumbled in the dark corner where he was seated for his walking-stick, and when the waiter had picked it up for him from under the seats he went away.
The late customer stood up, shivering, searched in the dark corner where he was sitting for his walking stick, and when the waiter retrieved it for him from under the seats, he left.
And Gagnière rambled on:
And Gagnière went on:
‘Berlioz has mingled literature with his work. He is the musical illustrator of Shakespeare, Virgil, and Goethe. But what a painter!—the Delacroix of music, who makes sound blaze forth amidst effulgent contrasts of colour. And withal he has romanticism in his brain, a religious mysticism that carries him away, an ecstasy that soars higher than mountain summits. A bad builder of operas, but marvellous in detached pieces, asking too much at times of the orchestra which he tortures, having pushed the personality of instruments to its furthest limits; for each instrument represents a character to him. Ah! that remark of his about clarionets: “They typify beloved women.” Ah! it has always made a shiver run down my back. And Chopin, so dandified in his Byronism; the dreamy poet of those who suffer from neurosis! And Mendelssohn, that faultless chiseller! a Shakespeare in dancing pumps, whose “songs without words” are gems for women of intellect! And after that—after that—a man should go down on his knees.’
‘Berlioz has combined literature with his music. He is the musical interpreter of Shakespeare, Virgil, and Goethe. But what a painter he is!—the Delacroix of music, making sound burst forth amidst vibrant contrasts of color. And on top of that, he has romanticism in his mind, a religious mysticism that sweeps him away, an ecstasy that soars higher than mountain peaks. He may not be great at writing operas, but he’s fantastic in shorter pieces, sometimes asking too much from the orchestra which he pushes to its limits; to him, each instrument represents a character. Ah! That comment he made about clarinets: “They symbolize beloved women.” Ah! That has always sent a shiver down my spine. And Chopin, so stylish in his Byronic flair; the dreamy poet for those who struggle with anxiety! And Mendelssohn, that perfect sculptor! a Shakespeare in dancing shoes, whose “songs without words” are treasures for intelligent women! And after all that—after all that—a man should get down on his knees.’
There was now only one gas-lamp alight just above his head, and the waiter standing behind him stood waiting amid the gloomy, chilly void of the room. Gagnière’s voice had come to a reverential tremolo. He was reaching devotional fervour as he approached the inner tabernacle, the holy of holies.
There was now only one gas lamp lit just above his head, and the waiter standing behind him waited in the gloomy, chilly emptiness of the room. Gagnière’s voice had taken on a respectful tremolo. He was reaching a fervent devotion as he approached the inner tabernacle, the sacred space.
‘Oh! Schumann, typical of despair, the voluptuousness of despair! Yes, the end of everything, the last song of saddened purity hovering above the ruins of the world! Oh! Wagner, the god in whom centuries of music are incarnated! His work is the immense ark, all the arts blended in one; the real humanity of the personages at last expressed, the orchestra itself living apart the life of the drama. And what a massacre of conventionality, of inept formulas! what a revolutionary emancipation amid the infinite! The overture of “Tannhauser,” ah! that’s the sublime hallelujah of the new era. First of all comes the chant of the pilgrims, the religious strain, calm, deep and slowly throbbing; then the voices of the sirens gradually drown it; the voluptuous pleasures of Venus, full of enervating delight and languor, grow more and more imperious and disorderly; and soon the sacred air gradually returns, like the aspiring voice of space, and seizes hold of all other strains and blends them in one supreme harmony, to waft them away on the wings of a triumphal hymn!’
‘Oh! Schumann, so typical of despair, the richness of despair! Yes, the end of everything, the final song of pure sadness floating above the ruins of the world! Oh! Wagner, the god in whom centuries of music are embodied! His work is the enormous ark, all the arts blended into one; the true humanity of the characters finally expressed, the orchestra itself living the life of the drama. And what a slaughter of conventionality, of useless formulas! what a revolutionary freedom amid the infinite! The overture of “Tannhauser,” ah! that’s the sublime hallelujah of the new era. First comes the song of the pilgrims, the spiritual melody, calm, deep, and slowly beating; then the voices of the sirens gradually drown it; the seductive pleasures of Venus, full of exhausting delight and languor, grow more and more powerful and chaotic; and soon the sacred melody gradually returns, like the aspiring voice of space, and seizes hold of all other melodies and blends them into one supreme harmony, to carry them away on the wings of a triumphal hymn!’
‘I am going to shut up, sir,’ repeated the waiter.
‘I’m going to be quiet, sir,’ the waiter repeated.
Claude, who no longer listened, he also being absorbed in his own passion, emptied his glass of beer and cried: ‘Eh, old man, they are going to shut up.’
Claude, who wasn’t paying attention anymore because he was caught up in his own thoughts, finished his beer and said, “Hey, old man, they’re going to close down.”
Then Gagnière trembled. A painful twitch came over his ecstatic face, and he shivered as if he had dropped from the stars. He gulped down his beer, and once on the pavement outside, after pressing his companion’s hand in silence, he walked off into the gloom.
Then Gagnière trembled. A painful twitch crossed his ecstatic face, and he shivered as if he had fallen from the stars. He downed his beer, and once outside on the pavement, after silently squeezing his companion’s hand, he walked off into the dark.
It was nearly two o’clock in the morning when Claude returned to the Rue de Douai. During the week that he had been scouring Paris anew, he had each time brought back with him the feverish excitement of the day. But he had never before returned so late, with his brain so hot and smoky. Christine, overcome with fatigue, was asleep under the lamp, which had gone out, her brow resting on the edge of the table.
It was almost two in the morning when Claude got back to the Rue de Douai. During the week he had spent exploring Paris again, he always came back buzzing with the excitement of the day. But he had never returned this late, with his mind feeling so heated and foggy. Christine, utterly exhausted, was sleeping under the lamp, which had gone out, her forehead resting on the edge of the table.
VIII
AT last Christine gave a final stroke with her feather-broom, and they were settled. The studio in the Rue de Douai, small and inconvenient, had only one little room, and a kitchen, as big as a cupboard, attached to it. They were obliged to take their meals in the studio; they had to live in it, with the child always tumbling about their legs. And Christine had a deal of trouble in making their few sticks suffice, as she wished to do, in order to save expense. After all, she was obliged to buy a second-hand bedstead; and yielded to the temptation of having some white muslin curtains, which cost her seven sous the metre. The den then seemed charming to her, and she began to keep it scrupulously clean, resolving to do everything herself, and to dispense with a servant, as living would be a difficult matter.
At last, Christine gave one last sweep with her feather broom, and everything was set. The studio on Rue de Douai, small and cramped, had only one tiny room, with a kitchen the size of a cupboard attached to it. They had to eat in the studio; they were living in it with the child constantly running around their legs. Christine struggled to make their few supplies last, as she intended to save money. In the end, she had to buy a second-hand bed frame and couldn't resist the temptation of getting some white muslin curtains that cost her seven sous per meter. The place then seemed lovely to her, and she started to keep it impeccably clean, deciding to do everything herself and manage without a servant since living would be difficult.
During the first months Claude lived in ever-increasing excitement. His peregrinations through the noisy streets; his feverish discussions on the occasion of his visits to friends; all the rage and all the burning ideas he thus brought home from out of doors, made him hold forth aloud even in his sleep. Paris had seized hold of him again; and in the full blaze of that furnace, a second youth, enthusiastic ambition to see, do, and conquer, had come upon him. Never had he felt such a passion for work, such hope, as if it sufficed for him to stretch out his hand in order to create masterpieces that should set him in the right rank, which was the first. While crossing Paris he discovered subjects for pictures everywhere; the whole city, with its streets, squares, bridges, and panoramas of life, suggested immense frescoes, which he, however, always found too small, for he was intoxicated with the thought of doing something colossal. Thus he returned home quivering, his brain seething with projects; and of an evening threw off sketches on bits of paper, in the lamp-light, without being able to decide by what he ought to begin the series of grand productions that he dreamt about.
During the first few months, Claude lived in a growing state of excitement. His wanderings through the noisy streets, his intense discussions during visits to friends, and all the passion and bold ideas he brought home from outside made him talk in his sleep. Paris had captured him again; in the fiery energy of that city, he felt a second youth and an enthusiastic ambition to see, do, and achieve. He had never experienced such a passion for work or such hope, as if it were enough for him to reach out his hand to create masterpieces that would earn him the top spot he desired. While traversing Paris, he found inspiration for art everywhere; the entire city—with its streets, squares, bridges, and vibrant life—suggested grand murals, which he always thought were too small because he was thrilled by the idea of creating something monumental. So he returned home buzzing, his mind overflowing with ideas; in the evenings, he sketched on scraps of paper by lamplight, unable to decide how to start the series of grand works he envisioned.
One serious obstacle was the smallness of his studio. If he had only had the old garret of the Quai de Bourbon, or even the huge dining-room of Bennecourt! But what could he do in that oblong strip of space, that kind of passage, which the landlord of the house impudently let to painters for four hundred francs a year, after roofing it in with glass? The worst was that the sloping glazed roof looked to the north, between two high walls, and only admitted a greenish cellar-like light. He was therefore obliged to postpone his ambitious projects, and he decided to begin with average-sized canvases, wisely saying to himself that the dimensions of a picture are not a proper test of an artist’s genius.
One major challenge was the small size of his studio. If only he had the old attic at Quai de Bourbon, or even the large dining room in Bennecourt! But what could he do in that long, narrow space, like a hallway, that the landlord had the audacity to rent to artists for four hundred francs a year, after covering it with glass? The worst part was the slanted glass roof facing north, squeezed between two tall walls, which only let in a greenish, basement-like light. Because of this, he had to put his ambitious plans on hold and decided to start with medium-sized canvases, wisely reminding himself that the size of a painting isn’t the real measure of an artist’s talent.
The moment seemed to him favourable for the success of a courageous artist who, amidst the breaking up of the old schools, would at length bring some originality and sincerity into his work. The formulas of recent times were already shaken. Delacroix had died without leaving any disciples. Courbet had barely a few clumsy imitators behind him; their best pieces would merely become so many museum pictures, blackened by age, tokens only of the art of a certain period. It seemed easy to foresee the new formula that would spring from theirs, that rush of sunshine, that limpid dawn which was rising in new works under the nascent influence of the ‘open air’ school. It was undeniable; those light-toned paintings over which people had laughed so much at the Salon of the Rejected were secretly influencing many painters, and gradually brightening every palette. Nobody, as yet, admitted it, but the first blow had been dealt, and an evolution was beginning, which became more perceptible at each succeeding Salon. And what a stroke it would be if, amidst the unconscious copies of impotent essayists, amidst the timid artful attempts of tricksters, a master were suddenly to reveal himself, giving body to the new formula by dint of audacity and power, without compromise, showing it such as it should be, substantial, entire, so that it might become the truth of the end of the century!
The moment seemed right for a bold artist who, amidst the breakdown of traditional schools, would finally bring some originality and sincerity to his work. The formulas of recent times were already in disarray. Delacroix had passed away without leaving any followers. Courbet had only a few awkward imitators, and their best pieces would just become museum artifacts, faded by time, mere reminders of a certain period of art. It was easy to see the new approach that would emerge from theirs, that burst of sunlight, that clear dawn which was rising in new works influenced by the emerging ‘open air’ school. It was undeniable; those light-toned paintings that had drawn laughter at the Salon of the Rejected were quietly impacting many artists and gradually brightening every palette. No one admitted it yet, but the first blow had been struck, and an evolution was beginning to be noticeable with each passing Salon. And how amazing it would be if, amidst the unconscious copies of ineffective writers, amidst the cautious attempts of fakes, a master were to suddenly emerge, embodying the new approach with courage and strength, without compromise, presenting it as it should be, complete and substantial, so that it might become the truth of the end of the century!
In that first hour of passion and hope, Claude, usually so harassed by doubts, believed in his genius. He no longer experienced any of those crises, the anguish of which had driven him for days into the streets in quest of his vanished courage. A fever stiffened him, he worked on with the blind obstinacy of an artist who dives into his entrails, to drag therefrom the fruit that tortures him. His long rest in the country had endowed him with singular freshness of visual perception, and joyous delight in execution; he seemed to have been born anew to his art, and endowed with a facility and balance of power he had never hitherto possessed. He also felt certain of progress, and experienced great satisfaction at some successful bits of work, in which his former sterile efforts at last culminated. As he had said at Bennecourt, he had got hold of his ‘open air,’ that carolling gaiety of tints which astonished his comrades when they came to see him. They all admired, convinced that he would only have to show his work to take a very high place with it, such was its individuality of style, for the first time showing nature flooded with real light, amid all the play of reflections and the constant variations of colours.
In that first hour of excitement and hope, Claude, usually tormented by doubts, believed in his talent. He no longer felt any of those crises that had driven him for days into the streets in search of his lost courage. A fever gripped him; he worked on with the stubborn determination of an artist who delves deep within himself to extract the elusive inspiration that torments him. His long break in the countryside had given him a unique freshness in how he viewed things and a joyful excitement in creating; it felt like he was reborn into his art, equipped with a skill and balance of power he had never had before. He also felt confident in making progress and experienced deep satisfaction at some successful pieces of work where his earlier unproductive efforts finally found fruition. As he had said at Bennecourt, he had grasped his 'open air,' that cheerful vibrancy of colors that amazed his friends when they came to visit him. They all admired him, convinced that with such a distinctive style, he would easily earn a prominent place in the art world, as this was the first time he depicted nature bathed in genuine light, complete with the play of reflections and the endless variations of colors.
Thus, for three years, Claude struggled on, without weakening, spurred to further efforts by each rebuff, abandoning nought of his ideas, but marching straight before him, with all the vigour of faith.
Thus, for three years, Claude kept going strong, undeterred, motivated by each setback, holding on to all his ideas, and moving forward with unwavering determination.
During the first year he went forth amid the December snows to place himself for four hours a day behind the heights of Montmartre, at the corner of a patch of waste land whence as a background he painted some miserable, low, tumble-down buildings, overtopped by factory chimneys, whilst in the foreground, amidst the snow, he set a girl and a ragged street rough devouring stolen apples. His obstinacy in painting from nature greatly complicated his work, and gave rise to almost insuperable difficulties. However, he finished this picture out of doors; he merely cleaned and touched it up a bit in his studio. When the canvas was placed beneath the wan daylight of the glazed roof, he himself was startled by its brutality. It showed like a scene beheld through a doorway open on the street. The snow blinded one. The two figures, of a muddy grey in tint, stood out, lamentable. He at once felt that such a picture would not be accepted, but he did not try to soften it; he sent it to the Salon, all the same. After swearing that he would never again try to exhibit, he now held the view that one should always present something to the hanging committee if merely to accentuate its wrong-doing. Besides, he admitted the utility of the Salon, the only battlefield on which an artist might come to the fore at one stroke. The hanging committee refused his picture.
During his first year, he went out into the December snow to spend four hours a day at the corner of a vacant lot behind the heights of Montmartre. From there, he painted some rundown, shabby buildings topped with factory chimneys as a backdrop, while in the foreground, amidst the snow, he depicted a girl and a ragged street kid devouring stolen apples. His stubbornness in painting from life made his work much harder and created nearly insurmountable challenges. Nevertheless, he completed this painting outdoors; he only cleaned it up a bit in his studio. When the canvas was placed under the dim light of the skylight, he was taken aback by its harshness. It looked like a scene viewed through an open doorway onto the street. The snow was blinding, and the two figures, in a muddy grey tone, stood out pitifully. He immediately realized that such a painting wouldn’t be accepted, but he didn’t try to make it softer; he sent it to the Salon anyway. After vowing never to try exhibiting again, he came to believe that one should always submit something to the hanging committee just to highlight their failings. Plus, he acknowledged the usefulness of the Salon, the only place where an artist might suddenly gain recognition. The hanging committee rejected his painting.
The second year Claude sought a contrast. He selected a bit of the public garden of Batignolles in May; in the background were some large chestnut trees casting their shade around a corner of greensward and several six-storied houses; while in front, on a seat of a crude green hue, some nurses and petty cits of the neighbourhood sat in a line watching three little girls making sand pies. When permission to paint there had been obtained, he had needed some heroism to bring his work to a successful issue amid the bantering crowd. At last he made up his mind to go there at five in the morning, in order to paint in the background; reserving the figures, he contented himself with making mere sketches of them from nature, and finishing them in his studio. This time his picture seemed to him less crude; it had acquired some of the wan, softened light which descended through the glass roof. He thought his picture accepted, for all his friends pronounced it to be a masterpiece, and went about saying that it would revolutionise the Salon. There was stupefaction and indignation when a fresh refusal of the hanging committee was rumoured. The committee’s intentions could not be denied: it was a question of systematically strangling an original artist. He, after his first burst of passion, vented all his anger upon his work, which he stigmatised as false, dishonest, and execrable. It was a well-deserved lesson, which he should remember: ought he to have relapsed into that cellar-like studio light? Was he going to revert to the filthy cooking of imaginary figures? When the picture came back, he took a knife and ripped it from top to bottom.
The second year, Claude wanted a change. He chose a spot in the public garden of Batignolles in May; in the background were some large chestnut trees casting shade over a patch of grass and several six-story buildings; in front, on a rough green bench, some nurses and local residents were sitting in a line watching three little girls making sand pies. After getting permission to paint there, he had to muster some courage to complete his work amid the teasing crowd. Finally, he decided to go there at five in the morning to paint the background; he focused on sketching the figures from life and finished them in his studio. This time, he felt his painting was less raw; it had taken on some of the soft, muted light that came through the glass roof. He thought his painting was good; all his friends called it a masterpiece and claimed it would change the Salon. There was shock and outrage when word spread that the hanging committee had rejected it again. The committee's motives were clear: they aimed to systematically stifle an original artist. After his initial surge of anger, he directed all his frustration at his work, which he labeled as false, dishonest, and terrible. It was a deserved lesson that he would remember: should he have gone back to that dim, cellar-like studio light? Was he going to revert to the messy portrayal of imaginary figures? When the painting returned, he took a knife and slashed it from top to bottom.
And so during the third year he obstinately toiled on a work of revolt. He wanted the blazing sun, that Paris sun which, on certain days, turns the pavement to a white heat in the dazzling reflection from the house frontages. Nowhere is it hotter; even people from burning climes mop their faces; you would say you were in some region of Africa beneath the heavily raining glow of a sky on fire. The subject Claude chose was a corner of the Place du Carrousel, at one o’clock in the afternoon, when the sunrays fall vertically. A cab was jolting along, its driver half asleep, its horse steaming, with drooping head, vague amid the throbbing heat. The passers-by seemed, as it were, intoxicated, with the one exception of a young woman, who, rosy and gay under her parasol, walked on with an easy queen-like step, as if the fiery element were her proper sphere. But what especially rendered this picture terrible was a new interpretation of the effects of light, a very accurate decomposition of the sunrays, which ran counter to all the habits of eyesight, by emphasising blues, yellows and reds, where nobody had been accustomed to see any. In the background the Tuileries vanished in a golden shimmer; the paving-stones bled, so to say; the figures were only so many indications, sombre patches eaten into by the vivid glare. This time his comrades, while still praising, looked embarrassed, all seized with the same apprehensions. Such painting could only lead to martyrdom. He, amidst their praises, understood well enough the rupture that was taking place, and when the hanging committee had once more closed the Salon against him, he dolorously exclaimed, in a moment of lucidity:
And so during his third year, he stubbornly worked on a piece of protest. He wanted the blazing sun, that Parisian sun which, on certain days, makes the pavement feel scalding with its dazzling reflection from the building facades. It’s hotter there than anywhere; even people from hot places are wiping their foreheads; you’d think you were in some part of Africa under an intensely glowing sky. The scene Claude chose was a corner of the Place du Carrousel at one o’clock in the afternoon, when the sun's rays come straight down. A cab was bouncing along, the driver half asleep, the horse steaming, with its head drooping, lost in the suffocating heat. The passers-by seemed to be dazed, except for a young woman who, radiant and cheerful under her parasol, walked with a graceful, confident stride, as if the scorching heat was her natural environment. But what made this picture particularly striking was his new interpretation of light effects, a very precise breakdown of the sunlight that challenged conventional perception by highlighting blues, yellows, and reds where no one had been used to seeing them. In the background, the Tuileries faded into a golden haze; the paving stones seemed to bleed; the figures were merely dark shapes consumed by the bright light. This time, his peers, while still praising him, looked uneasy, all sharing the same concerns. Such painting could only lead to suffering. He, amidst their admiration, understood the split that was happening, and when the hanging committee once again shut the Salon to him, he lamented in a moment of clarity:
‘All right; it’s an understood thing—I’ll die at the task.’
‘All right; it’s a given—I’ll die trying.’
However, although his obstinate courage seemed to increase, he now and then gradually relapsed into his former doubts, consumed by the struggle he was waging with nature. Every canvas that came back to him seemed bad to him—above all incomplete, not realising what he had aimed at. It was this idea of impotence that exasperated him even more than the refusals of the hanging committee. No doubt he did not forgive the latter; his works, even in an embryo state, were a hundred times better than all the trash which was accepted. But what suffering he felt at being ever unable to show himself in all his strength, in such a master-piece as he could not bring his genius to yield! There were always some superb bits in his paintings. He felt satisfied with this, that, and the other. Why, then, were there sudden voids? Why were there inferior bits, which he did not perceive while he was at work, but which afterwards utterly killed the picture like ineffaceable defects? And he felt quite unable to make any corrections; at certain moments a wall rose up, an insuperable obstacle, beyond which he was forbidden to venture. If he touched up the part that displeased him a score of times, so a score of times did he aggravate the evil, till everything became quite muddled and messy.
However, even though his stubborn courage seemed to grow, he occasionally slipped back into his old doubts, tormented by the battle he was fighting with nature. Every canvas that came back to him felt wrong—especially incomplete, failing to capture what he had aimed for. This sense of powerlessness frustrated him even more than the rejections from the hanging committee. No doubt he held a grudge against them; his works, even in their unfinished state, were a hundred times better than all the garbage that was being accepted. But the pain he felt from never being able to present his full potential in a masterpiece that his genius couldn't produce was profound! There were always some brilliant elements in his paintings. He felt pleased with this, that, and the other. So, why were there sudden gaps? Why were there weaker parts that he didn’t notice while working but that later completely ruined the painting like permanent flaws? And he felt totally incapable of making any fixes; at certain moments, a wall would rise up, an insurmountable barrier, beyond which he was forbidden to go. If he tried to fix the parts that annoyed him over and over, he only made it worse each time, until everything turned into a jumbled mess.
He grew anxious, and failed to see things clearly; his brush refused to obey him, and his will was paralysed. Was it his hands or his eyes that ceased to belong to him amid those progressive attacks of the hereditary disorder that had already made him anxious? Those attacks became more frequent; he once more lapsed into horrible weeks, wearing himself out, oscillating betwixt uncertainty and hope; and his only support during those terrible hours, which he spent in a desperate hand-to-hand struggle with his rebellious work, was the consoling dream of his future masterpiece, the one with which he would at last be fully satisfied, in painting which his hands would show all the energy and deftness of true creative skill. By some ever-recurring phenomenon, his longing to create outstripped the quickness of his fingers; he never worked at one picture without planning the one that was to follow. Then all that remained to him was an eager desire to rid himself of the work on which he was engaged, for it brought him torture; no doubt it would be good for nothing; he was still making fatal concessions, having recourse to trickery, to everything that a true artist should banish from his conscience. But what he meant to do after that—ah! what he meant to do—he beheld it superb and heroic, above attack and indestructible. All this was the everlasting mirage that goads on the condemned disciples of art, a falsehood that comes in a spirit of tenderness and compassion, and without which production would become impossible to those who die of their failure to create life.
He became anxious and couldn't see things clearly; his brush wouldn't cooperate, and his will felt paralyzed. Was it his hands or his eyes that no longer felt connected to him amid those recurring episodes of the hereditary disorder that had already made him uneasy? Those episodes grew more frequent; he slipped back into terrible weeks, exhausting himself while swinging between uncertainty and hope. His only comfort during those awful hours, spent in a desperate battle with his uncooperative work, was the comforting vision of his future masterpiece, the one that would finally satisfy him, where his hands would display all the energy and skill of true creativity. In a recurring twist, his desire to create always outpaced the speed of his fingers; he never worked on one picture without planning the next one. All he felt was a strong urge to finish the piece he was working on because it was torturous; he thought it would be worthless. He kept making damaging compromises, resorting to tricks—everything a true artist should avoid. But what he envisioned doing after that—ah! What he meant to create—was magnificent and heroic, immune to criticism and indestructible. This was the eternal illusion that drives the doomed disciples of art, a falsehood born from a sense of care and compassion, without which making art would become impossible for those who suffer from their failures in creating life.
In addition to those constantly renewed struggles with himself, Claude’s material difficulties now increased. Was it not enough that he could not give birth to what he felt existing within him? Must he also battle with every-day cares? Though he refused to admit it, painting from nature in the open air became impossible when a picture was beyond a certain size. How could he settle himself in the streets amidst the crowd?—how obtain from each person the necessary number of sittings? That sort of painting must evidently be confined to certain determined subjects, landscapes, small corners of the city, in which the figures would be but so many silhouettes, painted in afterwards. There were also a thousand and one difficulties connected with the weather; the wind which threatened to carry off the easel, the rain which obliged one to interrupt one’s work. On such days Claude came home in a rage, shaking his fist at the sky and accusing nature of resisting him in order that he might not take and vanquish her. He also complained bitterly of being poor; for his dream was to have a movable studio, a vehicle in Paris, a boat on the Seine, in both of which he would have lived like an artistic gipsy. But nothing came to his aid, everything conspired against his work.
In addition to his ongoing battles with himself, Claude’s financial struggles were growing. Was it not enough that he couldn't express what he felt inside? Did he also have to deal with everyday worries? Although he wouldn’t admit it, painting outdoors became impossible when a piece was larger than a certain size. How could he set up in the streets amidst the crowds? How could he get enough sittings from each person? That kind of painting clearly had to be limited to specific subjects—landscapes, little corners of the city, where the figures could just be silhouettes added later. Plus, there were countless issues related to the weather; the wind that threatened to blow away his easel, the rain that forced him to stop working. On such days, Claude would return home furious, shaking his fist at the sky and blaming nature for resisting him so he couldn't conquer it. He also lamented his poverty; his dream was to have a mobile studio, either a vehicle in Paris or a boat on the Seine, where he could live like an artistic nomad. But nothing came to his aid, and everything seemed to conspire against his work.
And Christine suffered with Claude. She had shared his hopes very bravely, brightening the studio with her housewifely activity; but now she sat down, discouraged, when she saw him powerless. At each picture which was refused she displayed still deeper grief, hurt in her womanly self-love, taking that pride in success which all women have. The painter’s bitterness soured her also; she entered into his feelings and passions, identified herself with his tastes, defended his painting, which had become, as it were, part of herself, the one great concern of their lives—indeed, the only important one henceforth, since it was the one whence she expected all her happiness. She understood well enough that art robbed her more and more of her lover each day, but the real struggle between herself and art had not yet begun. For the time she yielded, and let herself be carried away with Claude, so that they might be but one—one only in the self-same effort. From that partial abdication of self there sprang, however, a sadness, a dread of what might be in store for her later on. Every now and then a shudder chilled her to the very heart. She felt herself growing old, while intense melancholy upset her, an unreasoning longing to weep, which she satisfied in the gloomy studio for hours together, when she was alone there.
And Christine struggled with Claude. She had bravely shared his hopes, filling the studio with her homemaking activities; but now she sat down, feeling defeated, when she saw him powerless. With each painting that was rejected, her sorrow deepened, wounded in her sense of womanhood, taking that pride in success that all women have. The painter’s bitterness affected her too; she connected with his emotions and passions, identified herself with his tastes, and defended his artwork, which had become, in a way, a part of her—the one big focus of their lives—indeed, the only thing that mattered going forward, as it was the source of all her happiness. She understood well enough that art was gradually stealing her lover away each day, but the real conflict between her and art had not yet begun. For now, she gave in and allowed herself to be absorbed by Claude, hoping they could be one—united in the same struggle. However, from this partial surrender of herself came a sadness, a fear of what might lie ahead. Every so often, a chill would run through her. She felt herself aging, while deep melancholy unsettled her, a senseless longing to cry that she satisfied in the gloomy studio for hours on end when she was alone there.
At that period her heart expanded, as it were, and a mother sprang from the loving woman. That motherly feeling for her big artist child was made up of all the vague infinite pity which filled her with tenderness, of the illogical fits of weakness into which she saw him fall each hour, of the constant pardons which she was obliged to grant him. He was beginning to make her unhappy, his caresses were few and far between, a look of weariness constantly overspread his features. How could she love him then if not with that other affection of every moment, remaining in adoration before him, and unceasingly sacrificing herself? In her inmost being insatiable passion still lingered; she was still the sensuous woman with thick lips set in obstinately prominent jaws. Yet there was a gentle melancholy, in being merely a mother to him, in trying to make him happy amid that life of theirs which now was spoilt.
During that time, her heart seemed to grow, and a mother emerged from the caring woman. That maternal instinct for her big artist child was filled with the endless pity that made her tender, the irrational moments of weakness she watched him experience regularly, and the constant forgiveness she had to offer him. He was starting to make her unhappy; his affectionate gestures became rare, and a look of exhaustion was always present on his face. How could she love him then if not with that other kind of affection that was ever-present, remaining in awe of him and constantly putting herself aside? Deep down, an insatiable passion still existed; she was still the sensual woman with full lips set in persistently strong jaws. Yet there was a gentle sadness in merely being a mother to him, in her attempts to bring him happiness in their now-damaged life.
Little Jacques was the only one to suffer from that transfer of tenderness. She neglected him more; the man, his father, became her child, and the poor little fellow remained as mere testimony of their great passion of yore. As she saw him grow up, and no longer require so much care, she began to sacrifice him, without intentional harshness, but merely because she felt like that. At meal-times she only gave him the inferior bits; the cosiest nook near the stove was not for his little chair; if ever the fear of an accident made her tremble now and then, her first cry, her first protecting movement was not for her helpless child. She ever relegated him to the background, suppressed him, as it were: ‘Jacques, be quiet; you tire your father. Jacques, keep still; don’t you see that your father is at work?’
Little Jacques was the only one affected by that shift in affection. She paid less attention to him; the man, his father, became her focus, and the poor little boy was left as just a reminder of their past love. As she watched him grow up and become less dependent, she started to neglect him, not out of cruelty, but simply because that was how she felt. During meals, she only gave him the less desirable food; the coziest spot by the stove was not for his little chair; whenever a worry about an accident crossed her mind, her first instinct and protective gesture were never for her defenseless child. She always pushed him to the sidelines, almost dismissing him: “Jacques, be quiet; you’re annoying your father. Jacques, stay still; can’t you see that your father is working?”
The urchin suffered from being cooped up in Paris. He, who had had the whole country-side to roll about in, felt stifled in the narrow space where he now had to keep quiet. His rosy cheeks became pale, he grew up puny, serious, like a little man, with eyes which stared at things in wonder. He was five by now, and his head by a singular phenomenon had become disproportionately large, in such wise as to make his father say, ‘He has a great man’s nut!’ But the child’s intelligence seemed, on the contrary, to decrease in proportion as his skull became larger. Very gentle and timid, he became absorbed in thought for hours, incapable of answering a question. And when he emerged from that state of immobility he had mad fits of shouting and jumping, like a young animal giving rein to instinct. At such times warnings ‘to keep quiet’ rained upon him, for his mother failed to understand his sudden outbursts, and became uneasy at seeing the father grow irritated as he sat before his easel. Getting cross herself, she would then hastily seat the little fellow in his corner again. Quieted all at once, giving the startled shudder of one who has been too abruptly awakened, the child would after a time doze off with his eyes wide open, so careless of enjoying life that his toys, corks, pictures, and empty colour-tubes dropped listlessly from his hands. Christine had already tried to teach him his alphabet, but he had cried and struggled, so they had decided to wait another year or two before sending him to school, where his masters would know how to make him learn.
The little boy was cramped living in Paris. He, who had previously roamed freely in the countryside, felt suffocated in the small space where he now had to be quiet. His rosy cheeks turned pale, and he grew up small and serious, like a little man, with wide eyes that stared at everything in awe. He was now five years old, and oddly enough, his head had become disproportionately large, leading his father to say, ‘He has a great man’s head!’ But the child’s smarts seemed to shrink as his head grew bigger. Very gentle and shy, he would get lost in thought for hours, unable to answer any questions. And when he finally broke out of that stillness, he would have wild fits of shouting and jumping around, like a young animal acting on instinct. During these outbursts, there were a lot of warnings to 'be quiet,' since his mother didn’t understand why he suddenly yelled, and she got anxious seeing his father getting annoyed while working at his easel. Getting frustrated herself, she would quickly put him back in his corner. Suddenly quiet, he would give a startled shudder, like someone who’s been jolted awake, and after a while, he would drift off with his eyes wide open, so detached from enjoying life that his toys, corks, pictures, and empty paint tubes would fall carelessly from his hands. Christine had already tried to teach him his alphabet, but he had cried and fought against it, so they decided to wait another year or two before sending him to school, where his teachers would know how to help him learn.
Christine at last began to grow frightened at the prospect of impending misery. In Paris, with that growing child beside them, living proved expensive, and the end of each month became terrible, despite her efforts to save in every direction. They had nothing certain but Claude’s thousand francs a year; and how could they live on fifty francs a month, which was all that was left to them after deducting four hundred francs for the rent? At first they had got out of embarrassment, thanks to the sale of a few pictures, Claude having found Gagnière’s old amateur, one of those detested bourgeois who possess the ardent souls of artists, despite the monomaniacal habits in which they are confined. This one, M. Hue, a retired chief clerk in a public department, was unfortunately not rich enough to be always buying, and he could only bewail the purblindness of the public, which once more allowed a genius to die of starvation; for he himself, convinced, struck by grace at the first glance, had selected Claude’s crudest works, which he hung by the side of his Delacroix, predicting equal fortune for them. The worst was that Papa Malgras had just retired after making his fortune. It was but a modest competence after all, an income of about ten thousand francs, upon which he had decided to live in a little house at Bois Colombes, like the careful man he was.
Christine finally started to feel scared about the looming misery. In Paris, with that growing child alongside them, living became costly, and the end of each month was dreadful, no matter how hard she tried to save in every way possible. Their only certainty was Claude’s thousand francs a year; and how could they survive on fifty francs a month, which was all they had left after paying four hundred francs for rent? At first, they managed to get through the tough times thanks to selling a few paintings, with Claude having found Gagnière’s old amateur—one of those loathed bourgeois who possess the passionate souls of artists, despite the obsessive routines in which they’re trapped. This particular one, M. Hue, a retired chief clerk in a public department, unfortunately wasn’t wealthy enough to keep buying, and he could only lament the shortsightedness of the public, which once again allowed a genius to die of starvation; for he himself, convinced and struck by inspiration at first sight, had chosen Claude’s rawest works, which he displayed next to his Delacroix, predicting equal success for them. The worst news was that Papa Malgras had just retired after making his fortune. It was only a modest income of about ten thousand francs, and he decided to live in a small house in Bois Colombes, just like the prudent man he was.
It was highly amusing to hear him speak of the famous Naudet, full of disdain for the millions turned over by that speculator, ‘millions that would some day fall upon his nose,’ said Malgras. Claude, having casually met him, only succeeded in selling him a last picture, one of his sketches from the nude made at the Boutin studio, that superb study of a woman’s trunk which the erstwhile dealer had not been able to see afresh without feeling a revival of his old passion for it. So misery was imminent; outlets were closing instead of new ones opening; disquieting rumours were beginning to circulate concerning the young painter’s works, so constantly rejected at the Salon; and besides, Claude’s style of art, so revolutionary and imperfect, in which the startled eye found nought of admitted conventionality, would of itself have sufficed to drive away wealthy buyers. One evening, being unable to settle his bill at his colour shop, the painter had exclaimed that he would live upon the capital of his income rather than lower himself to the degrading production of trade pictures. But Christine had violently opposed such an extreme measure; she would retrench still further; in short, she preferred anything to such madness, which would end by throwing them into the streets without even bread to eat.
It was quite amusing to hear him talk about the famous Naudet, full of contempt for the millions that speculator had made, “millions that one day would come crashing down on him,” Malgras said. Claude, having bumped into him casually, managed to sell him one last picture, one of his sketches of a nude done at the Boutin studio, a stunning study of a woman’s torso that the former dealer couldn’t look at without reigniting his old passion for it. So trouble was on the horizon; opportunities were shutting down instead of new ones opening up; troubling rumors were starting to spread about the young painter’s works, which were constantly being rejected at the Salon; plus, Claude’s style of art, so groundbreaking and flawed, where the startled eye found nothing of accepted norms, was enough to scare off wealthy buyers. One evening, unable to pay his bill at the paint shop, the painter declared that he would live off his savings rather than compromise himself by making commercial art. But Christine fiercely opposed such an extreme choice; she would cut back even more; in short, she preferred anything to that kind of madness, which would eventually leave them in the streets without even bread to eat.
After the rejection of Claude’s third picture, the summer proved so wonderfully fine that the painter seemed to derive new strength from it. There was not a cloud; limpid light streamed day after day upon the giant activity of Paris. Claude had resumed his peregrinations through the city, determined to find a masterstroke, as he expressed it, something huge, something decisive, he did not exactly know what. September came, and still he had found nothing that satisfied him; he simply went mad for a week about one or another subject, and then declared that it was not the thing after all. His life was spent in constant excitement; he was ever on the watch, on the point of setting his hand on the realisation of his dream, which always flew away. In reality, beneath his intractable realism lay the superstition of a nervous woman; he believed in occult and complex influences; everything, luck or ill-luck, must depend upon the view selected.
After Claude's third painting was rejected, the summer turned out to be so beautiful that the artist seemed to gain new energy from it. There wasn’t a single cloud in the sky; clear sunlight poured down day after day on the bustling activity of Paris. Claude had started wandering around the city again, determined to find a masterpiece, as he called it—something big, something definitive, though he wasn’t quite sure what it would be. September rolled around, and he still hadn’t found anything that made him happy; he would obsess over one subject or another for a week, then decide it wasn’t right after all. His life was a constant whirlwind of excitement; he was always on the lookout, just about to grasp the realization of his dreams, which always seemed to slip away. In truth, underneath his stubborn realism was the superstition of a nervous person; he believed in hidden and complicated influences; everything, whether good luck or bad luck, had to depend on the perspective he chose.
One afternoon—it was one of the last fine days of the season—Claude took Christine out with him, leaving little Jacques in the charge of the doorkeeper, a kind old woman, as was their wont when they wanted to go out together. That day the young painter was possessed by a sudden whim to ramble about and revisit in Christine’s company the nooks beloved in other days; and behind this desire of his there lurked a vague hope that she would bring him luck. And thus they went as far as the Pont Louis-Philippe, and remained for a quarter of an hour on the Quai des Ormes, silent, leaning against the parapet, and looking at the old Hôtel du Martoy, across the Seine, where they had first loved each other. Then, still without saying a word, they went their former round; they started along the quays, under the plane trees, seeing the past rise up before them at every step. Everything spread out again: the bridges with their arches opening upon the sheeny water; the Cité, enveloped in shade, above which rose the flavescent towers of Notre-Dame; the great curve of the right bank flooded with sunlight, and ending in the indistinct silhouette of the Pavillon de Flore, together with the broad avenues, the monuments and edifices on both banks, and all the life of the river, the floating wash-houses, the baths, and the lighters.
One afternoon—it was one of the last nice days of the season—Claude took Christine out with him, leaving little Jacques in the care of the doorkeeper, a kind old woman, as they usually did when they wanted to go out together. That day, the young painter suddenly felt the urge to wander and revisit the favorite spots he had shared with Christine in the past; beneath this desire was a faint hope that she would bring him good luck. So they walked as far as the Pont Louis-Philippe and spent about fifteen minutes on the Quai des Ormes, silently leaning against the railing and looking at the old Hôtel du Martoy across the Seine, where they had first fallen in love. Then, still without speaking, they retraced their previous route; they began along the quays, under the plane trees, seeing memories come back to them at every step. Everything unfolded again: the bridges with their arches opening onto the glistening water; the Cité, wrapped in shade, above which rose the golden towers of Notre-Dame; the great curve of the right bank bathed in sunlight, leading to the blurred outline of the Pavillon de Flore, along with the wide avenues, the monuments and buildings on both banks, and all the life of the river, the floating laundries, the baths, and the barges.
As of old, the orb in its decline followed them, seemingly rolling along the distant housetops, and assuming a crescent shape, as it appeared from behind the dome of the Institute. There was a dazzling sunset, they had never beheld a more magnificent one, such a majestic descent amidst tiny cloudlets that changed into purple network, between the meshes of which a shower of gold escaped. But of the past that thus rose up before their eyes there came to them nought but invincible sadness—a sensation that things escaped them, and that it was impossible for them to retrace their way up stream and live their life over again. All those old stones remained cold. The constant current beneath the bridges, the water that had ever flowed onward and onward, seemed to have borne away something of their own selves, the delight of early desire and the joyfulness of hope. Now that they belonged to one another, they no longer tasted the simple happiness born of feeling the warm pressure of their arms as they strolled on slowly, enveloped by the mighty vitality of Paris.
As in the past, the setting sun trailed behind them, seemingly rolling over the distant rooftops and taking on a crescent shape as it peeked out from behind the Institute's dome. It was a stunning sunset; they'd never seen one more beautiful, with its grand descent surrounded by tiny clouds that transformed into a purple mesh, through which golden rays broke free. Yet, the memories that rose up before them only brought a deep sadness—a feeling that everything was slipping away from them, and it was impossible to turn back and relive their lives again. The old stones felt cold to them. The constant flow of water beneath the bridges, always moving forward, seemed to carry away pieces of their own selves, the thrill of youthful desire and the joy of hope. Now that they were together, they no longer experienced the simple happiness that came from the warm embrace of their arms as they strolled slowly, surrounded by the vibrant energy of Paris.
On reaching the Pont des Saints-Pères, Claude, in sheer despair, stopped short. He had relinquished Christine’s arm, and had turned his face towards the point of the Cité. She no doubt felt the severance that was taking place and became very sad. Seeing that he lingered there obliviously, she wished to regain her hold upon him.
On reaching the Pont des Saints-Pères, Claude, overwhelmed with despair, suddenly stopped. He had let go of Christine’s arm and turned his face towards the Cité. She surely sensed the separation happening and became very sad. Noticing that he stood there lost in thought, she wanted to reclaim her connection with him.
‘My dear,’ said she, ‘let us go home; it’s time. Jacques will be waiting for us, you know.’
‘My dear,’ she said, ‘let’s head home; it’s time. Jacques will be waiting for us, you know.’
But he went half way across the bridge, and she had to follow him. Then once more he remained motionless, with his eyes still fixed on the Cité, on that island which ever rode at anchor, the cradle and heart of Paris, where for centuries all the blood of her arteries had converged amid the constant growth of faubourgs invading the plain. And a glow came over Claude’s face, his eyes sparkled, and at last he made a sweeping gesture:
But he walked halfway across the bridge, and she had no choice but to follow him. Then, once again, he stood still, his eyes locked on the Cité, that island that always seemed to be anchored there, the cradle and heart of Paris, where for centuries all the lifeblood of the city had flowed amid the constant spread of suburbs taking over the plain. A glow spread across Claude’s face, his eyes lit up, and finally, he made a grand gesture:
‘Look! Look!’
"Check it out!"
In the immediate foreground beneath them was the port of St. Nicolas, with the low shanties serving as offices for the inspectors of navigation, and the large paved river-bank sloping down, littered with piles of sand, barrels, and sacks, and edged with a row of lighters, still full, in which busy lumpers swarmed beneath the gigantic arm of an iron crane. Then on the other side of the river, above a cold swimming-bath, resounding with the shouts of the last bathers of the season, the strips of grey linen that served as a roofing flapped in the wind. In the middle, the open stream flowed on in rippling, greenish wavelets tipped here and there with white, blue, and pink. And then there came the Pont des Arts, standing back, high above the water on its iron girders, like black lace-work, and animated by a ceaseless procession of foot-passengers, who looked like ants careering over the narrow line of the horizontal plane. Below, the Seine flowed away to the far distance; you saw the old arches of the Pont-Neuf, browny with stone-rust; on the left, as far as the Isle of St. Louis, came a mirror-like gap; and the other arm of the river curved sharply, the lock gates of the Mint shutting out the view with a bar of foam. Along the Pont-Neuf passed big yellow omnibuses, motley vehicles of all kinds, with the mechanical regularity of so many children’s toys. The whole of the background was inframed within the perspective of the two banks; on the right were houses on the quays, partly hidden by a cluster of lofty trees, from behind which on the horizon there emerged a corner of the Hôtel de Ville, together with the square clock tower of St. Gervais, both looking as indistinct as if they had stood far away in the suburbs. And on the left bank there was a wing of the Institute, the flat frontage of the Mint, and yet another enfilade of trees.
In the immediate foreground below them was the port of St. Nicolas, where low shanties served as offices for navigation inspectors. The large paved riverbank sloped down, scattered with piles of sand, barrels, and sacks, bordered by a row of lighters still loaded, with busy workers bustling underneath the massive arm of an iron crane. On the other side of the river, above a cold swimming pool echoing with the shouts of the last bathers of the season, strips of gray linen used as roofing flapped in the wind. In the center, the open stream flowed on in rippling greenish waves, occasionally topped with white, blue, and pink. The Pont des Arts arched high above the water on its iron supports, resembling black lace, constantly animated by a stream of foot passengers who looked like ants scurrying across the narrow bridge. Below, the Seine flowed toward the distance, revealing the old arches of the Pont-Neuf, brown with stone rust; to the left, a mirror-like gap extended toward the Isle of St. Louis, while the other arm of the river curved sharply, with the lock gates of the Mint blocking the view with a frothy barrier. Big yellow buses and all kinds of colorful vehicles crossed the Pont-Neuf, moving with the mechanical regularity of children’s toys. The entire scene was framed by the perspective of the two banks; to the right were houses lining the quays, partially hidden by a cluster of tall trees, from which a corner of the Hôtel de Ville and the square clock tower of St. Gervais emerged on the horizon, looking as distant as if they were far away in the suburbs. On the left bank stood part of the Institute, the flat façade of the Mint, and yet another row of trees.
But the centre of the immense picture, that which rose most prominently from the stream and soared to the sky, was the Cité, showing like the prow of an antique vessel, ever burnished by the setting sun. Down below, the poplars on the strip of ground that joins the two sections of the Pont-Neuf hid the statue of Henri IV. with a dense mass of green foliage. Higher up, the sun set the two lines of frontages in contrast, wrapping the grey buildings of the Quai de l’Horloge in shade, and illumining with a blaze those of the Quai des Orfèvres, rows of irregular houses which stood out so clearly that one distinguished the smallest details, the shops, the signboards, even the curtains at the windows. Higher up, amid the jagged outlines of chimney stacks, behind a slanting chess-board of smaller roofs, the pepper-caster turrets of the Palais de Justice and the garrets of the Prefecture of Police displayed sheets of slate, intersected by a colossal advertisement painted in blue upon a wall, with gigantic letters which, visible to all Paris, seemed like some efflorescence of the feverish life of modern times sprouting on the city’s brow. Higher, higher still, betwixt the twin towers of Notre-Dame, of the colour of old gold, two arrows darted upwards, the spire of the cathedral itself, and to the left that of the Sainte-Chapelle, both so elegantly slim that they seemed to quiver in the breeze, as if they had been the proud topmasts of the ancient vessel rising into the brightness of the open sky.
But the center of the huge scene, which rose the highest from the river and reached for the sky, was the Cité, looking like the bow of an ancient ship, always gleaming in the setting sun. Down below, the poplars on the patch of land connecting the two sections of the Pont-Neuf concealed the statue of Henri IV. with a thick cluster of green leaves. Higher up, the sun created a contrast between the two lines of buildings, casting shade on the grey structures of the Quai de l’Horloge while illuminating the Quai des Orfèvres with a brilliant light, making the irregular rows of houses distinct enough to see the smallest details: the shops, the signs, even the curtains at the windows. Even higher, among the jagged shapes of chimney stacks and behind a slanted patchwork of smaller roofs, the spire-like towers of the Palais de Justice and the attics of the Prefecture of Police displayed slate sheets, intersected by a massive advertisement painted in blue on a wall, with giant letters that, visible to all of Paris, seemed like a burst of the hectic life of modern times sprouting on the city’s forehead. Higher still, between the twin towers of Notre-Dame, which were the color of old gold, two spires shot up, the cathedral's spire itself and to the left that of the Sainte-Chapelle, both so elegantly slender that they seemed to tremble in the breeze, as if they were the proud masts of the ancient ship reaching toward the brightness of the open sky.
‘Are you coming, dear?’ asked Christine, gently.
‘Are you coming, dear?’ Christine asked softly.
Claude did not listen to her; this, the heart of Paris, had taken full possession of him. The splendid evening seemed to widen the horizon. There were patches of vivid light, and of clearly defined shadow; there was a brightness in the precision of each detail, a transparency in the air, which throbbed with gladness. And the river life, the turmoil of the quays, all the people, streaming along the streets, rolling over the bridges, arriving from every side of that huge cauldron, Paris, steamed there in visible billows, with a quiver that was apparent in the sunlight. There was a light breeze, high aloft a flight of small cloudlets crossed the paling azure sky, and one could hear a slow but mighty palpitation, as if the soul of Paris here dwelt around its cradle.
Claude didn’t pay attention to her; this, the heart of Paris, had completely taken over him. The beautiful evening seemed to expand the horizon. There were patches of bright light and sharply defined shadows; each detail had a clarity that sparkled, and the air felt alive with joy. The life on the river, the hustle of the quays, all the people moving along the streets, crossing over the bridges, arriving from every direction in that vast melting pot, Paris, flowed there in visible waves, vibrating in the sunlight. There was a gentle breeze, and high up, a group of small clouds drifted across the pale blue sky, while one could hear a slow but powerful heartbeat, as if the soul of Paris lingered around its cradle.
But Christine, frightened at seeing Claude so absorbed, and seized herself with a kind of religious awe, took hold of his arm and dragged him away, as if she had felt that some great danger was threatening him.
But Christine, scared to see Claude so absorbed and overwhelmed with a sense of reverence, grabbed his arm and pulled him away, as if she sensed that some serious danger was looming over him.
‘Let us go home. You are doing yourself harm. I want to get back.’
‘Let’s go home. You’re hurting yourself. I want to get back.’
At her touch he started like a man disturbed in sleep. Then, turning his head to take a last look, he muttered: ‘Ah! heavens! Ah! heavens, how beautiful!’
At her touch, he jolted like someone waking from a dream. Then, turning his head to take one last look, he mumbled, “Oh! wow! Oh! wow, how beautiful!”
He allowed himself to be led away. But throughout the evening, first at dinner, afterwards beside the stove, and until he went to bed, he remained like one dazed, so deep in his cogitations that he did not utter half a dozen sentences. And Christine, failing to draw from him any answer to her questions, at last became silent also. She looked at him anxiously; was it the approach of some serious illness, had he inhaled some bad air whilst standing midway across the bridge yonder? His eyes stared vaguely into space, his face flushed as if with some inner straining. One would have thought it the mute travail of germination, as if something were springing into life within him.
He let himself be led away. But throughout the evening, first at dinner, then by the stove, and until he went to bed, he acted like he was in a daze, so lost in thought that he barely said half a dozen sentences. Christine, unable to get any answers to her questions, eventually fell silent as well. She looked at him nervously; was it the onset of some serious illness, had he breathed in bad air while standing on the bridge over there? His eyes stared blankly into space, and his face was flushed as if he was struggling with something inside. One might have thought it was the silent labor of growth, as if something was coming to life within him.
The next morning, immediately after breakfast, he set off, and Christine spent a very sorrowful day, for although she had become more easy in mind on hearing him whistle some of his old southern tunes as he got up, she was worried by another matter, which she had not mentioned to him for fear of damping his spirits again. That day they would for the first time lack everything; a whole week separated them from the date when their little income would fall due, and she had spent her last copper that morning. She had nothing left for the evening, not even the wherewithal to buy a loaf. To whom could she apply? How could she manage to hide the truth any longer from him when he came home hungry? She made up her mind to pledge the black silk dress which Madame Vanzade had formerly given her, but it was with a heavy heart; she trembled with fear and shame at the idea of the pawnshop, that familiar resort of the poor which she had never as yet entered. And she was tortured by such apprehension about the future, that from the ten francs which were lent her she only took enough to make a sorrel soup and a stew of potatoes. On coming out of the pawn-office, a meeting with somebody she knew had given her the finishing stroke.
The next morning, right after breakfast, he left, and Christine had a very sad day. Although she felt a bit better hearing him whistle some of his old southern songs as he got up, she was troubled by something else she hadn’t told him about for fear of bringing him down. That day, for the first time, they would have absolutely nothing; a whole week separated them from when their small income would come in, and she had spent her last coin that morning. She had nothing left for the evening, not even enough to buy a loaf of bread. Who could she turn to? How could she keep hiding the truth from him when he came home hungry? She decided to pawn the black silk dress that Madame Vanzade had once given her, but it weighed on her heart; she felt fear and shame at the thought of the pawnshop, that familiar place for the poor which she had never entered before. And she was so anxious about the future that out of the ten francs they lent her, she only took enough to make a sorrel soup and a potato stew. Coming out of the pawnshop, running into someone she knew pushed her over the edge.
As it happened, Claude came home very late, gesticulating merrily, and his eyes very bright, as if he were excited by some secret joy; he was very hungry, and grumbled because the cloth was not laid. Then, having sat down between Christine and little Jacques, he swallowed his soup and devoured a plateful of potatoes.
As it turned out, Claude came home really late, waving his arms cheerfully, and his eyes were shining, as if he was filled with some hidden happiness; he was super hungry and complained because the table wasn't set. Then, after sitting down between Christine and little Jacques, he quickly ate his soup and devoured a plate of potatoes.
‘Is that all?’ he asked, when he had finished. ‘You might as well have added a scrap of meat. Did you have to buy some boots again?’
‘Is that it?’ he asked when he finished. ‘You could've at least thrown in a piece of meat. Did you really have to buy boots again?’
She stammered, not daring to tell him the truth, but hurt at heart by this injustice. He, however, went on chaffing her about the coppers she juggled away to buy herself things with; and getting more and more excited, amid the egotism of feelings which he seemingly wished to keep to himself, he suddenly flew out at Jacques.
She stammered, too afraid to tell him the truth, but her heart ached from this unfairness. He, however, continued teasing her about the coins she spent to buy herself things; and getting more and more worked up, caught up in his own feelings that he seemed to want to keep to himself, he suddenly snapped at Jacques.
‘Hold your noise, you brat!—you drive one mad.’
‘Be quiet, you kid!—you're driving me crazy.’
The child, forgetting all about his dinner, had been tapping the edge of his plate with his spoon, his eyes full of mirthful delight at this music.
The child, completely forgetting about his dinner, had been tapping the edge of his plate with his spoon, his eyes shining with joyful delight at the sound.
‘Jacques, be quiet,’ scoldingly said his mother, in her turn. ‘Let your father have his dinner in peace.’
‘Jacques, be quiet,’ his mother said reprimandingly. ‘Let your father enjoy his dinner in peace.’
Then the little one, abashed, at once became very quiet, and relapsed into gloomy stillness, with his lustreless eyes fixed on his potatoes, which, however, he did not eat.
Then the little one, embarrassed, immediately became very quiet and fell into a gloomy silence, with his dull eyes fixed on his potatoes, which he still didn’t eat.
Claude made a show of stuffing himself with cheese, while Christine, quite grieved, offered to fetch some cold meat from a ham and beef shop; but he declined, and prevented her going by words that pained her still more. Then, the table having been cleared, they all sat round the lamp for the evening, she sewing, the little one turning over a picture-book in silence, and Claude drumming on the table with his fingers, his mind the while wandering back to the spot whence he had come. Suddenly he rose, sat down again with a sheet of paper and a pencil, and began sketching rapidly, in the vivid circle of light that fell from under the lamp-shade. And such was his longing to give outward expression to the tumultuous ideas beating in his skull, that soon this sketch did not suffice for his relief. On the contrary, it goaded him on, and he finished by unburthening his mind in a flood of words. He would have shouted to the walls; and if he addressed himself to his wife it was because she happened to be there.
Claude pretended to stuff himself with cheese, while Christine, feeling quite upset, offered to go get some cold meat from a deli; but he refused and used words that hurt her even more to stop her. Once the table was cleared, they all gathered around the lamp for the evening—she was sewing, the little one was quietly flipping through a picture book, and Claude was drumming his fingers on the table, his thoughts drifting back to where he had come from. Suddenly, he got up, sat back down with a sheet of paper and a pencil, and started sketching quickly in the bright circle of light from under the lampshade. His need to express the chaotic ideas swirling in his mind became so intense that soon the sketch wasn’t enough to satisfy him. Instead, it pushed him to pour out his thoughts in a rush of words. He felt like shouting at the walls, and when he spoke to his wife, it was only because she happened to be there.
‘Look, that’s what we saw yesterday. It’s magnificent. I spent three hours there to-day. I’ve got hold of what I want—something wonderful, something that’ll knock everything else to pieces. Just look! I station myself under the bridge; in the immediate foreground I have the Port of St. Nicolas, with its crane, its lighters which are being unloaded, and its crowd of labourers. Do you see the idea—it’s Paris at work—all those brawny fellows displaying their bare arms and chests? Then on the other side I have the swimming-baths—Paris at play—and some skiff there, no doubt, to occupy the centre of the composition; but of that I am not as yet certain. I must feel my way. As a matter of course, the Seine will be in the middle, broad, immense.’
‘Look, that’s what we saw yesterday. It’s amazing. I spent three hours there today. I’ve got exactly what I want—something incredible, something that’ll stand out above everything else. Just look! I positioned myself under the bridge; in the foreground, I have the Port of St. Nicolas, with its crane, the boats being unloaded, and the crowd of workers. Do you see the idea—it’s Paris in action—all those strong guys showing off their bare arms and chests? Then on the other side, I have the swimming pools—Paris having fun—and there’ll probably be a small boat to fill the center of the scene; but I’m not sure about that yet. I need to explore a bit more. Naturally, the Seine will be in the middle, wide and vast.’
While talking, he kept on indicating outlines with his pencil, thickening his strokes over and over again, and tearing the paper in his very energy. She, in order to please him, bent over the sketch, pretending to grow very interested in his explanations. But there was such a labyrinth of lines, such a confusion of summary details, that she failed to distinguish anything.
While they talked, he kept drawing outlines with his pencil, repeatedly thickening his strokes and tearing the paper with his energy. To please him, she leaned over the sketch, pretending to be really interested in his explanations. But there was such a maze of lines and so much confusion in the details that she couldn't make sense of anything.
‘You are following me, aren’t you?’
"You're following me, aren't you?"
‘Yes, yes, very beautiful indeed.’
"Yes, very beautiful indeed."
‘Then I have the background, the two arms of the rivet with their quays, the Cité, rising up triumphantly in the centre, and standing out against the sky. Ah! that background, what a marvel! People see it every day, pass before it without stopping; but it takes hold of one all the same; one’s admiration accumulates, and one fine afternoon it bursts forth. Nothing in the world can be grander; it is Paris herself, glorious in the sunlight. Ah! what a fool I was not to think of it before! How many times I have looked at it without seeing! However, I stumbled on it after that ramble along the quays! And, do you remember, there’s a dash of shadow on that side; while here the sunrays fall quite straight. The towers are yonder; the spire of the Sainte-Chapelle tapers upward, as slim as a needle pointing to the sky. But no, it’s more to the right. Wait, I’ll show you.’
‘Then I have the background, the two arms of the rivet with their wharfs, the Cité, rising up triumphantly in the center, standing out against the sky. Ah! that background, what a marvel! People see it every day, walk past it without stopping; but it still grabs hold of you; your admiration builds up, and one fine afternoon it bursts forth. Nothing in the world can be grander; it is Paris herself, glorious in the sunlight. Ah! what a fool I was not to think of it before! How many times I have looked at it without really seeing! However, I stumbled upon it after that walk along the wharfs! And, do you remember, there’s a bit of shadow on that side; while here the sunrays fall straight down. The towers are over there; the spire of the Sainte-Chapelle tapers upward, as slim as a needle pointing to the sky. But no, it’s more to the right. Wait, I’ll show you.’
He began again, never wearying, but constantly retouching the sketch, and adding innumerable little characteristic details which his painter’s eye had noticed; here the red signboard of a distant shop vibrated in the light; closer by was a greenish bit of the Seine, on whose surface large patches of oil seemed to be floating; and then there was the delicate tone of a tree, the gamut of greys supplied by the house frontages, and the luminous cast of the sky. She complaisantly approved of all he said and tried to look delighted.
He started again, never getting tired, constantly refining the sketch, and adding countless little unique details that his artist's eye had spotted; there was the red signboard of a shop far away, shimmering in the light; nearby, a greenish section of the Seine had large patches of oil floating on its surface; and then there was the soft hue of a tree, the range of greys from the building fronts, and the bright glow of the sky. She cheerfully approved of everything he mentioned and tried to appear thrilled.
But Jacques once again forgot what he had been told. After long remaining silent before his book, absorbed in the contemplation of a wood-cut depicting a black cat, he began to hum some words of his own composition: ‘Oh, you pretty cat; oh, you ugly cat; oh, you pretty, ugly cat,’ and so on, ad infinitum, ever in the same lugubrious manner.
But Jacques once again forgot what he had been told. After sitting in silence for a long time in front of his book, lost in thought while looking at a woodcut of a black cat, he started to hum some lyrics he had made up: ‘Oh, you pretty cat; oh, you ugly cat; oh, you pretty, ugly cat,’ and so on, ad infinitum, always in the same gloomy way.
Claude, who was made fidgety by the buzzing noise, did not at first understand what was upsetting him. But after a time the child’s harassing phrase fell clearly upon his ear.
Claude, who was made restless by the buzzing noise, didn't initially grasp what was bothering him. But after a while, the child's annoying phrase became clear to him.
‘Haven’t you done worrying us with your cat?’ he shouted furiously.
“Haven’t you stopped worrying us with your cat?” he yelled angrily.
‘Hold your tongue, Jacques, when your father is talking!’ repeated Christine.
‘Hold your tongue, Jacques, when your father is talking!’ Christine repeated.
Upon my word, I do believe he is becoming an idiot. Just look at his head, if it isn’t like an idiot’s. It’s dreadful. Just say; what do you mean by your pretty and ugly cat?’
Upon my word, I really think he’s turning into an idiot. Just look at his head; it looks just like an idiot’s. It’s awful. Just tell me, what do you mean by your pretty and ugly cat?
The little fellow, turning pale and wagging his big head, looked stupid, and replied: ‘Don’t know.’
The little guy, turning pale and shaking his big head, looked clueless and replied, “I don’t know.”
Then, as his father and mother gazed at each other with a discouraged air, he rested his cheek on the open picture-book, and remained like that, neither stirring nor speaking, but with his eyes wide open.
Then, while his dad and mom looked at each other with a discouraged expression, he rested his cheek on the open picture book and stayed like that, not moving or speaking, but with his eyes wide open.
It was getting late; Christine wanted to put him to bed, but Claude had already resumed his explanations. He now told her that, the very next morning, he should go and make a sketch on the spot, just in order to fix his ideas. And, as he rattled on, he began to talk of buying a small camp easel, a thing upon which he had set his heart for months. He kept harping on the subject, and spoke of money matters till she at last became embarrassed, and ended by telling him of everything—the last copper she had spent that morning, and the silk dress she had pledged in order to dine that evening. Thereupon he became very remorseful and affectionate; he kissed her and asked her forgiveness for having complained about the dinner. She would excuse him, surely; he would have killed father and mother, as he kept on repeating, when that confounded painting got hold of him. As for the pawn-shop, it made him laugh; he defied misery.
It was getting late; Christine wanted to put him to bed, but Claude was already back to his explanations. He told her that the very next morning, he planned to go and do a sketch on-site just to solidify his ideas. As he kept talking, he started discussing buying a small camp easel, something he had been wanting for months. He wouldn't stop going on about it and talked about money until she finally felt uncomfortable and ended up sharing everything—how much she had spent that morning and the silk dress she had pawned just to afford dinner that evening. That made him feel very guilty and affectionate; he kissed her and asked for her forgiveness for complaining about the dinner. Surely, she would forgive him; he claimed he would have killed for his parents if that annoying painting hadn’t consumed him. As for the pawnshop, it just made him laugh; he laughed in the face of poverty.
‘I tell you that we are all right,’ he exclaimed. ‘That picture means success.’
“I’m telling you that we’re all good,” he said excitedly. “That picture means success.”
She kept silent, thinking about her meeting of the morning, which she wished to hide from him; but without apparent cause or transition, in the kind of torpor that had come over her, the words she would have kept back rose invincibly to her lips.
She stayed quiet, reflecting on her meeting from the morning that she wanted to keep from him; but for no clear reason or shift, in the kind of daze that had taken over her, the words she had intended to hold back inevitably came to her lips.
‘Madame Vanzade is dead,’ she said.
‘Madame Vanzade is dead,’ she said.
He looked surprised. Ah! really? How did she, Christine, know it?
He looked surprised. Oh! Really? How did she, Christine, know about it?
‘I met the old man-servant. Oh, he’s a gentleman by now, looking very sprightly, in spite of his seventy years. I did not know him again. It was he who spoke to me. Yes, she died six weeks ago. Her millions have gone to various charities, with the exception of an annuity to the old servants, upon which they are living snugly like people of the middle-classes.’
‘I met the old man-servant. Oh, he’s a gentleman now, looking very lively despite his seventy years. I didn’t recognize him at first. He was the one who talked to me. Yes, she passed away six weeks ago. Her millions have gone to various charities, except for an annuity for the old servants, which allows them to live comfortably like middle-class people.’
He looked at her, and at last murmured, in a saddened voice: ‘My poor Christine, you are regretting things now, aren’t you? She would have given you a marriage portion, have found you a husband! I told you so in days gone by. She would, perhaps, have left you all her money, and you wouldn’t now be starving with a crazy fellow like myself.’
He looked at her and finally said, in a sad voice: ‘My poor Christine, you're regretting things now, aren’t you? She would have given you a dowry, found you a husband! I told you this before. She might have left you all her money, and you wouldn't be starving with a crazy guy like me.’
She then seemed to wake from her dream. She drew her chair to his, caught hold of one of his arms and nestled against him, as if her whole being protested against his words:
She then appeared to come back to reality. She pulled her chair close to his, grabbed one of his arms, and snuggled against him, as if her entire being was pushing back against his words:
‘What are you saying? Oh! no; oh! no. It would have been shameful to have thought of her money. I would confess it to you if it were the case, and you know that I never tell lies; but I myself don’t know what came over me when I heard the news. I felt upset and saddened, so sad that I imagined everything was over for me. It was no doubt remorse; yes, remorse at having deserted her so brutally, poor invalid that she was, the good old soul who called me her daughter! I behaved very badly, and it won’t bring me luck. Ah! don’t say “No,” I feel it well enough; henceforth there’s an end to everything for me.’
‘What are you talking about? Oh, no; oh, no. It would have been shameful to think about her money. I would admit it to you if that were the case, and you know I never lie; but I honestly don't know what got into me when I heard the news. I felt upset and sad, so sad that I thought everything was over for me. It was probably guilt; yes, guilt for abandoning her so harshly, poor thing that she was, the kind old soul who called me her daughter! I acted very badly, and it won’t bring me any good fortune. Ah! don’t say “No,” I know it all too well; from now on, it’s the end of everything for me.’
Then she wept, choked by those confused regrets, the significance of which she failed to understand, regrets mingling with the one feeling that her life was spoilt, and that she now had nothing but unhappiness before her.
Then she cried, overwhelmed by those tangled regrets, the meaning of which she couldn’t grasp, regrets mixed with the one feeling that her life was ruined, and that all she had ahead of her was unhappiness.
‘Come, wipe your eyes,’ said Claude, becoming affectionate once more. ‘Is it possible that you, who were never nervous, can conjure up chimeras and worry yourself in this way? Dash it all, we shall get out of our difficulties! First of all, you know that it was through you that I found the subject for my picture. There cannot be much of a curse upon you, since you bring me luck.’
‘Come on, wipe your eyes,’ Claude said, becoming affectionate again. ‘Is it really possible that you, who were never anxious, can come up with these fears and stress yourself out like this? Come on, we’ll get through our problems! First of all, you know it was because of you that I found the inspiration for my painting. There can’t be much of a curse on you since you bring me good luck.’
He laughed, and she shook her head, seeing well enough that he wanted to make her smile. She was suffering on account of his picture already; for on the bridge he had completely forgotten her, as if she had ceased to belong to him! And, since the previous night, she had realised that he was farther and farther removed from her, alone in a world to which she could not ascend. But she allowed him to soothe her, and they exchanged one of their kisses of yore, before rising from the table to retire to rest.
He laughed, and she shook her head, clearly seeing that he wanted to make her smile. She was already feeling hurt because of his picture; on the bridge, he had completely forgotten her, as if she no longer mattered to him! And since the night before, she had realized that he was becoming more and more distant from her, alone in a world she couldn’t enter. But she let him comfort her, and they shared one of their old kisses before getting up from the table to go to bed.
Little Jacques had heard nothing. Benumbed by his stillness, he had fallen asleep, with his cheek on his picture-book; and his big head, so heavy at times that it bent his neck, looked pale in the lamplight. Poor little offspring of genius, which, when it begets at all, so often begets idiocy or physical imperfection! When his mother put him to bed Jacques did not even open his eyes.
Little Jacques had heard nothing. Stunned by the quiet, he had fallen asleep with his cheek on his picture book, and his big head, which sometimes felt so heavy it strained his neck, looked pale in the lamplight. Poor little child of genius, which, when it does manage to create, often produces either stupidity or physical flaws! When his mother put him to bed, Jacques didn’t even open his eyes.
It was only at this period that the idea of marrying Christine came to Claude. Though yielding to the advice of Sandoz, who expressed his surprise at the prolongation of an irregular situation which no circumstances justified, he more particularly gave way to a feeling of pity, to a desire to show himself kind to his mistress, and to win forgiveness for his delinquencies. He had seen her so sad of late, so uneasy with respect to the future, that he did not know how to revive her spirits. He himself was growing soured, and relapsing into his former fits of anger, treating her, at times, like a servant, to whom one flings a week’s notice. Being his lawful wife, she would, no doubt, feel herself more in her rightful home, and would suffer less from his rough behaviour. She herself, for that matter, had never again spoken of marriage. She seemed to care nothing for earthly things, but entirely reposed upon him; however, he understood well enough that it grieved her that she was not able to visit at Sandoz’s. Besides, they no longer lived amid the freedom and solitude of the country; they were in Paris, with its thousand and one petty spites, everything that is calculated to wound a woman in an irregular position. In reality, he had nothing against marriage save his old prejudices, those of an artist who takes life as he lists. Since he was never to leave her, why not afford her that pleasure? And, in fact, when he spoke to her about it, she gave a loud cry and threw her arms round his neck, surprised at experiencing such great emotion. During a whole week it made her feel thoroughly happy. But her joy subsided long before the ceremony.
It was only during this time that Claude started thinking about marrying Christine. Although he was influenced by Sandoz's advice—who was surprised at how long their irregular situation had lasted without reason—his motivation was largely out of pity, a desire to be kind to his mistress, and to earn her forgiveness for his mistakes. He had noticed how sad she had been lately, worried about the future, and he felt unsure about how to lift her spirits. He was becoming increasingly bitter, falling back into his old rages, sometimes treating her like a servant to whom one gives a week’s notice. As his legal wife, she would likely feel more at home and suffer less from his harsh behavior. In fact, she hadn't brought up marriage again. It seemed as though she didn't care about material things, relying completely on him; however, he understood that it upset her that she could no longer visit Sandoz. Moreover, they were no longer living in the freedom and solitude of the countryside; they were in Paris, surrounded by countless petty grievances—everything that could hurt a woman in an irregular situation. Really, his only hesitation about marriage was his old biases—those of an artist who lives life on his own terms. Since he never planned to leave her, why not give her that happiness? And when he brought it up, she gasped and threw her arms around his neck, surprised by the intensity of her feelings. For a whole week, it made her incredibly happy. But her joy faded long before the ceremony.
Moreover, Claude did not hurry over any of the formalities, and they had to wait a long while for the necessary papers. He continued getting the sketches for his picture together, and she, like himself, did not seem in the least impatient. What was the good? It would assuredly make no difference in their life. They had decided to be married merely at the municipal offices, not in view of displaying any contempt for religion, but to get the affair over quickly and simply. That would suffice. The question of witnesses embarrassed them for a moment. As she was absolutely unacquainted with anybody, he selected Sandoz and Mahoudeau to act for her. For a moment he had thought of replacing the latter by Dubuche, but he never saw the architect now, and he feared to compromise him. He, Claude, would be content with Jory and Gagnière. In that way the affair would pass off among friends, and nobody would talk of it.
Moreover, Claude didn’t rush through any of the formalities, and they had to wait quite a while for the necessary paperwork. He kept putting together the sketches for his painting, and she, like him, didn’t seem impatient at all. What was the point? It wouldn’t make any difference in their lives. They had decided to get married only at the city offices, not out of any disrespect for religion, but to make the process quick and simple. That was enough. The issue of witnesses made them a bit uncomfortable for a moment. Since she didn’t know anyone at all, he chose Sandoz and Mahoudeau to stand in for her. For a moment he considered replacing the latter with Dubuche, but he hadn’t seen the architect lately and was worried about compromising him. Claude was fine with having Jory and Gagnière. This way, the whole thing would happen among friends, and no one would gossip about it.
Several weeks had gone by; they were in December, and the weather proved terribly cold. On the day before the wedding, although they barely had thirty-five francs left them, they agreed that they could not send their witnesses away with a mere shake of the hand; and, rather than have a lot of trouble in the studio, they decided to offer them lunch at a small restaurant on the Boulevard de Clichy, after which they would all go home.
Several weeks had passed; it was December, and the weather was extremely cold. The day before the wedding, even though they only had thirty-five francs left, they decided they couldn't just send their witnesses away with a simple handshake. To avoid dealing with too much hassle at the studio, they opted to treat them to lunch at a small restaurant on Boulevard de Clichy, and after that, they would all head home.
In the morning, while Christine was tacking a collar to a grey linsey gown which, with the coquetry of woman, she had made for the occasion, it occurred to Claude, who was already wearing his frock-coat and kicking his heels impatiently, to go and fetch Mahoudeau, for the latter, he asserted, was quite capable of forgetting all about the appointment. Since autumn, the sculptor had been living at Montmartre, in a small studio in the Rue des Tilleuls. He had moved thither in consequence of a series of affairs that had quite upset him. First of all, he had been turned out of the fruiterer’s shop in the Rue du Cherche-Midi for not paying his rent; then had come a definite rupture with Chaîne, who, despairing of being able to live by his brush, had rushed into commercial enterprise, betaking himself to all the fairs around Paris as the manager of a kind of ‘fortune’s wheel’ belonging to a widow; while last of all had come the sudden flight of Mathilde, her herbalist’s business sold up, and she herself disappearing, it seemed, with some mysterious admirer. At present Mahoudeau lived all by himself in greater misery than ever, only eating when he secured a job at scraping some architectural ornaments, or preparing work for some more prosperous fellow-sculptor.
In the morning, while Christine was attaching a collar to a grey linen dress she had made for the occasion, it struck Claude, who was already wearing his suit and tapping his foot impatiently, that he should go and get Mahoudeau, since he believed the latter might completely forget their appointment. Since autumn, the sculptor had been living in Montmartre, in a small studio on Rue des Tilleuls. He had moved there after a series of personal crises had thrown him off balance. First, he had been kicked out of the fruit shop on Rue du Cherche-Midi for not paying his rent; then came a definite split with Chaîne, who, frustrated with his inability to make a living as an artist, had jumped into business, running a sort of 'fortune wheel' at fairs around Paris for a widow; and finally, there was the sudden departure of Mathilde, who sold her herbal shop and seemingly vanished with some mysterious admirer. Now, Mahoudeau was living alone in even greater misery, only eating when he managed to find a job scraping architectural decorations or doing work for some more successful sculptor.
‘I am going to fetch him, do you hear?’ Claude repeated to Christine. ‘We still have a couple of hours before us. And, if the others come, make them wait. We’ll go to the municipal offices all together.’
‘I’m going to get him, do you hear?’ Claude repeated to Christine. ‘We still have a couple of hours. And if the others arrive, make them wait. We’ll all go to the municipal offices together.’
Once outside, Claude hurried along in the nipping cold which loaded his moustache with icicles. Mahoudeau’s studio was at the end of a conglomeration of tenements—‘rents,’ so to say—and he had to cross a number of small gardens, white with rime, and showing the bleak, stiff melancholy of cemeteries. He could distinguish his friend’s place from afar on account of the colossal plaster statue of the ‘Vintaging Girl,’ the once successful exhibit of the Salon, for which there had not been sufficient space in the narrow ground-floor studio. Thus it was rotting out in the open like so much rubbish shot from a cart, a lamentable spectacle, weather-bitten, riddled by the rain’s big, grimy tears. The key was in the door, so Claude went in.
Once outside, Claude rushed through the biting cold, which coated his mustache with icicles. Mahoudeau’s studio was at the end of a cluster of tenements—what they called ‘rents’—and he had to pass through several small gardens, covered in frost, giving off the bleak, rigid sadness of graveyards. He could spot his friend’s place from a distance because of the massive plaster statue of the ‘Vintaging Girl,’ which had once been a successful exhibit at the Salon but didn’t have enough room in the cramped ground-floor studio. So, it was left to decay outside like a piece of junk tossed from a cart, a sad sight, weather-beaten, stained by the rain’s large, dirty tears. The key was in the door, so Claude let himself in.
‘Hallo! have you come to fetch me?’ said Mahoudeau, in surprise. ‘I’ve only got my hat to put on. But wait a bit, I was asking myself whether it wouldn’t be better to light a little fire. I am uneasy about my woman there.’
‘Hey! Did you come to pick me up?’ said Mahoudeau, surprised. ‘I just need to put on my hat. But hold on, I was thinking if it would be better to light a little fire. I’m worried about my woman over there.’
Some water in a bucket was ice-bound. So cold was the studio that it froze inside as hard as it did out of doors, for, having been penniless for a whole week, Mahoudeau had gingerly eked out the little coal remaining to him, only lighting the stove for an hour or two of a morning. His studio was a kind of tragic cavern, compared with which the shop of former days evoked reminiscences of snug comfort, such was the tomb-like chill that fell on one’s shoulders from the creviced ceiling and the bare walls. In the various corners some statues, of less bulky dimensions than the ‘Vintaging Girl,’ plaster figures which had been modelled with passion and exhibited, and which had then come back for want of buyers, seemed to be shivering with their noses turned to the wall, forming a melancholy row of cripples, some already badly damaged, showing mere stumps of arms, and all dust-begrimed and clay-bespattered. Under the eyes of their artist creator, who had given them his heart’s blood, those wretched nudities dragged out years of agony. At first, no doubt, they were preserved with jealous care, despite the lack of room, but then they lapsed into the grotesque honor of all lifeless things, until a day came when, taking up a mallet, he himself finished them off, breaking them into mere lumps of plaster, so as to be rid of them.
Some water in a bucket was frozen. The studio was so cold that it felt like it was frozen inside just as much as outside. Mahoudeau had been broke for a whole week, so he had carefully stretched out the little coal he had left, only turning on the stove for an hour or two in the morning. His studio was like a tragic cave; compared to the shop of the past, it reminded him of cozy comfort, given how the freezing chill from the cracked ceiling and bare walls weighed down on him. In various corners, some smaller statues than the ‘Vintaging Girl,’ plaster figures he had modeled with passion and displayed, had returned because there were no buyers. They seemed to shiver, facing the wall, forming a sad lineup of damaged figures, some with just stumps for arms, all covered in dust and splattered with clay. Under the gaze of their creator, who had poured his heart and soul into them, these pitiful nudes endured years of suffering. At first, he had taken great care of them despite the lack of space, but eventually, they fell into the absurd fate of all lifeless things until the day came when he picked up a mallet and smashed them into chunks of plaster to finally be rid of them.
‘You say we have got two hours, eh?’ resumed Mahoudeau. ‘Well, I’ll just light a bit of fire; it will be the wiser perhaps.’
‘You say we have two hours, right?’ Mahoudeau continued. ‘Well, I’ll just start a little fire; that might be the smarter move.’
Then, while lighting the stove, he began bewailing his fate in an angry voice. What a dog’s life a sculptor’s was! The most bungling stonemason was better off. A figure which the Government bought for three thousand francs cost well nigh two thousand, what with its model, clay, marble or bronze, all sorts of expenses, indeed, and for all that it remained buried in some official cellar on the pretext that there was no room for it elsewhere. The niches of the public buildings remained empty, pedestals were awaiting statues in the public gardens. No matter, there was never any room! And there were no possible commissions from private people; at best one received an order for a few busts, and at very rare intervals one for a memorial statue, subscribed for by the public and hurriedly executed at reduced terms. Sculpture was the noblest of arts, the most manly, yes, but the one which led the most surely to death by starvation!
Then, while lighting the stove, he started complaining about his misfortune in a frustrated voice. What a rough life a sculptor had! Even the clumsiest stonemason was better off. A sculpture that the Government bought for three thousand francs actually cost nearly two thousand, considering all the expenses for the model, clay, marble, or bronze, and despite that, it ended up sitting in some official storage with the excuse that there was no space for it anywhere else. The niches in public buildings stayed empty, pedestals were waiting for statues in public parks. No matter what, there was never any room! And there weren't any commissions from private clients; at best, one might get an order for a few busts, and very rarely, for a memorial statue, funded by the public and quickly made at a discount. Sculpture was the highest of arts, the most impressive, yes, but it was also the one that most reliably led to death by starvation!
‘Is your machine progressing?’ asked Claude.
‘Is your machine making progress?’ asked Claude.
‘Without this confounded cold, it would be finished,’ answered Mahoudeau. ‘I’ll show it you.’
‘If it weren’t for this annoying cold, it would be done,’ Mahoudeau replied. ‘I’ll show it to you.’
He rose from his knees after listening to the snorting of the stove. In the middle of the studio, on a packing-case, strengthened by cross-pieces, stood a statue swathed is linen wraps which were quite rigid, hard frozen, draping the figure with the whiteness of a shroud. This statue embodied Mahoudeau’s old dream, unrealised until now from lack of means—it was an upright figure of that bathing girl of whom more than a dozen small models had been knocking about his place for years. In a moment of impatient revolt he himself had manufactured trusses and stays out of broom-handles, dispensing with the necessary iron work in the hope that the wood would prove sufficiently solid. From time to time he shook the figure to try it, but as yet it had not budged.
He got up after listening to the stove snorting. In the middle of the studio, on a packing case reinforced with cross-pieces, stood a statue wrapped in stiff, frozen linen that draped the figure like a white shroud. This statue represented Mahoudeau’s long-held dream, finally realized after years of being unable to afford it—it was an upright figure of that bathing girl for whom he had had over a dozen small models hanging around his place for years. In a moment of frustrated inspiration, he had made supports out of broom handles, skipping the necessary metalwork, hoping that the wood would be strong enough. Occasionally, he shook the figure to test it, but so far, it hadn’t moved.
‘The devil!’ he muttered; ‘some warmth will do her good. These wraps seem glued to her—they form quite a breastplate.’
‘The devil!’ he muttered; ‘some warmth will do her good. These wraps seem stuck to her—they act like a shield.’
The linen was crackling between his fingers, and splinters of ice were breaking off. He was obliged to wait until the heat produced a slight thaw, and then with great care he stripped the figure, baring the head first, then the bosom, and then the hips, well pleased at finding everything intact, and smiling like a lover at a woman fondly adored.
The linen was crinkling in his hands, and pieces of ice were breaking off. He had to wait until the warmth caused a slight thaw, and then, with great care, he undressed the figure, exposing the head first, then the chest, and finally the hips, feeling satisfied to see everything intact, smiling like a man in love with a cherished woman.
‘Well, what do you think of it?’
‘Well, what do you think about it?’
Claude, who had only previously seen a little rough model of the statue, nodded his head, in order that he might not have to answer immediately. Decidedly, that good fellow Mahoudeau was turning traitor, and drifting towards gracefulness, in spite of himself, for pretty things ever sprang from under his big fingers, former stonecutter though he was. Since his colossal ‘Vintaging Girl,’ he had gone on reducing and reducing the proportions of his figures without appearing to be aware of it himself, always ready to stick out ferociously for the gigantic, which agreed with his temperament, but yielding to the partiality of his eyes for sweetness and gracefulness. And indeed real nature broke at last through inflated ambition. Exaggerated still, his ‘Bathing Girl’ was already possessed of great charm, with her quivering shoulders and her tightly-crossed arms that supported her breast.
Claude, who had only seen a rough model of the statue before, nodded his head so he wouldn’t have to respond right away. Clearly, that good guy Mahoudeau was betraying himself by moving towards elegance, whether he wanted to or not, because beautiful things always seemed to emerge from his big hands, even though he used to be a stonecutter. Since his massive ‘Vintaging Girl,’ he had kept shrinking the proportions of his figures without even realizing it, always ready to fiercely defend the gigantic style that suited his temperament, yet giving in to his eyes’ preference for sweetness and grace. In fact, real nature eventually broke through his inflated ambitions. Even though it was still exaggerated, his ‘Bathing Girl’ already had a lot of charm, with her trembling shoulders and her tightly crossed arms holding up her breast.
‘Well, you don’t like her?’ he asked, looking annoyed.
‘So, you don’t like her?’ he asked, looking irritated.
‘Oh, yes, I do! I think you are right to tone things down a bit, seeing that you feel like that. You’ll have a great success with this. Yes, it’s evident it will please people very much.’
‘Oh, yes, I do! I think you’re right to dial things back a bit since you feel that way. You’re going to have great success with this. Yes, it’s clear it will really please people.’
Mahoudeau, whom such praises would once have thrown into consternation, seemed delighted. He explained that he wished to conquer public opinion without relinquishing a tithe of his convictions.
Mahoudeau, who would have once been thrown into a panic by such praise, now seemed pleased. He explained that he wanted to win over public opinion without giving up any of his beliefs.
‘Ah! dash it! it takes a weight off my mind to find you pleased,’ said he, ‘for I should have destroyed it if you had told me to do so, I give you my word! Another fortnight’s work, and I’ll sell my skin to no matter whom in order to pay the moulder. I say, I shall have a fine show at the Salon, perhaps get a medal.’
‘Ah! Damn it! It's such a relief to see you happy,’ he said, ‘because I would have smashed it if you had asked me to, I promise! Just another two weeks of work, and I’ll do whatever it takes to pay the moulder. I mean, I'm going to have an amazing exhibition at the Salon, maybe even win a medal.’
He laughed, waved his arms about, and then, breaking off:
He laughed, waved his arms around, and then, suddenly stopping:
‘As we are not in a hurry, sit down a bit. I want to get the wraps quite thawed.’
‘Since we’re not in a rush, take a seat for a moment. I want to make sure the wraps are completely thawed.’
The stove, which was becoming red hot, diffused great heat. The figure, placed close by, seemed to revive under the warm air that now crept up her from her shins to her neck. And the two friends, who had sat down, continued looking the statue full in the face, chatting about it and noting each detail. The sculptor especially grew excited in his delight, and indulged in caressing gestures.
The stove, getting red hot, radiated intense heat. The figure nearby appeared to come to life under the warm air that flowed up from her legs to her neck. Meanwhile, the two friends, who had taken a seat, kept staring at the statue, discussing it and observing every detail. The sculptor, in particular, became animated with delight and made affectionate gestures.
All at once, however, Claude fancied he was the victim of some hallucination. To him the figure seemed to be moving; a quiver like the ripple of a wavelet crossed her stomach, and her left hip became straightened, as if the right leg were about to step out.
All of a sudden, though, Claude thought he might be experiencing some kind of hallucination. The figure seemed to be moving to him; a shiver like the ripple of a small wave passed over her stomach, and her left hip straightened as if her right leg was about to take a step.
‘Have you noticed the smooth surface just about the loins?’ Mahoudeau went on, without noticing anything. ‘Ah, my boy, I took great pains over that!’
‘Have you noticed the smooth surface just around the hips?’ Mahoudeau continued, not noticing anything. ‘Ah, my boy, I really worked hard on that!’
But by degrees the whole statue was becoming animated. The loins swayed and the bosom swelled, as with a deep sigh, between the parted arms. And suddenly the head drooped, the thighs bent, and the figure came forward like a living being, with all the wild anguish, the grief-inspired spring of a woman who is flinging herself down.
But little by little, the entire statue started to come to life. The hips moved and the chest expanded, as if taking a deep breath, between the outstretched arms. Then suddenly, the head drooped, the legs bent, and the figure surged forward like a living being, filled with all the wild pain, the sorrow-soaked energy of a woman throwing herself down.
Claude at last understood things, when Mahoudeau uttered a terrible cry. ‘By heavens, she’s breaking to pieces!—she is coming down!’
Claude finally understood everything when Mahoudeau let out a terrible cry. "By God, she’s falling apart!—she’s coming down!"
The clay, in thawing, had snapped the weak wooden trusses. There came a cracking noise, as if bones indeed were splitting; and Mahoudeau, with the same passionate gesture with which he had caressed the figure from afar, working himself into a fever, opened both arms, at the risk of being killed by the fall. For a moment the bathing girl swayed to and fro, and then with one crash came down on her face, broken in twain at the ankles, and leaving her feet sticking to the boards.
The clay, as it thawed, had broken the weak wooden supports. There was a cracking sound, like bones actually breaking; and Mahoudeau, with the same intense gesture he had used to admire the figure from a distance, got worked up and opened his arms wide, risking being crushed by the collapse. For a moment, the bathing girl teetered back and forth, and then with one sudden crash, she fell flat on her face, fractured at the ankles, leaving her feet stuck to the boards.
Claude had jumped up to hold his friend back.
Claude had jumped up to stop his friend.
‘Dash it! you’ll be smashed!’ he cried.
“Darn it! You’re going to be crushed!” he shouted.
But dreading to see her finish herself off on the floor, Mahoudeau remained with hands outstretched. And the girl seemed to fling herself on his neck. He caught her in his arms, winding them tightly around her. Her bosom was flattened against his shoulder and her thighs beat against his own, while her decapitated head rolled upon the floor. The shock was so violent that Mahoudeau was carried off his legs and thrown over, as far back as the wall; and there, without relaxing his hold on the girl’s trunk, he remained as if stunned lying beside her.
But dreading to see her hurt herself on the floor, Mahoudeau stayed with his hands outstretched. The girl seemed to throw herself onto his neck. He caught her in his arms, wrapping them tightly around her. Her chest pressed against his shoulder and her thighs struck against his own, while her head rolled on the floor. The shock was so intense that Mahoudeau was knocked off his feet and thrown back against the wall; and there, without letting go of the girl's body, he lay beside her as if stunned.
‘Ah! confound it!’ repeated Claude, furiously, believing that his friend was dead.
‘Ah! damn it!’ repeated Claude, furiously, believing that his friend was dead.
With great difficulty Mahoudeau rose to his knees, and burst into violent sobs. He had only damaged his face in the fall. Some blood dribbled down one of his cheeks, mingling with his tears.
With great effort, Mahoudeau got to his knees and broke down in heavy sobs. He had only hurt his face in the fall. Some blood trickled down one of his cheeks, mixing with his tears.
‘Ah! curse poverty!’ he said. ‘It’s enough to make a fellow drown himself not to be able to buy a couple of rods! And there she is, there she is!’
‘Ah! curse poverty!’ he said. ‘It’s enough to make someone want to drown themselves not being able to buy a couple of rods! And there she is, there she is!’
His sobs grew louder; they became an agonising wail; the painful shrieking of a lover before the mutilated corpse of his affections. With unsteady hands he touched the limbs lying in confusion around him; the head, the torso, the arms that had snapped in twain; above aught else the bosom, now caved in. That bosom, flattened, as if it had been operated upon for some terrible disease, suffocated him, and he unceasingly returned to it, probing the sore, trying to find the gash by which life had fled, while his tears, mingled with blood, flowed freely, and stained the statue’s gaping wounds with red.
His sobs got louder; they turned into an agonizing wail—the painful cries of a lover mourning the mutilated body of the one they loved. With shaky hands, he touched the dismembered limbs scattered around him: the head, the torso, the arms that had broken apart; above all, the chest, now sunken in. That chest, flattened as if it had been operated on for some dreadful illness, suffocated him, and he kept going back to it, probing the wound, trying to find the spot where life had escaped, while his tears, mixed with blood, flowed freely and stained the statue’s gaping wounds red.
‘Do help me!’ he gasped. ‘One can’t leave her like this.’
‘Please help me!’ he gasped. ‘You can’t just leave her like this.’
Claude was overcome also, and his own eyes grew moist from a feeling of artistic brotherliness. He hastened to his comrade’s aide, but the sculptor, after claiming his assistance, persisted in picking up the remains by himself, as if dreading the rough handling of anybody else. He slowly crawled about on his knees, took up the fragments one by one, and put them together on a board. The figure soon lay there in its entirety, as if it had been one of those girls who, committing suicide from love, throw themselves from some monument and are shattered by their fall, and put together again, looking both grotesque and lamentable, to be carried to the Morgue. Mahoudeau, seated on the floor before his statue, did not take his eyes from it, but became absorbed in heart-rending contemplation. However, his sobs subsided, and at last he said with a long-drawn sigh: ‘I shall have to model her lying down! There’s no other way! Ah, my poor old woman, I had such trouble to set her on her legs, and I thought her so grand like that!’
Claude was overwhelmed too, and his eyes misted over with a sense of artistic camaraderie. He rushed to help his friend, but the sculptor, after asking for assistance, insisted on picking up the pieces himself, as if afraid of anyone else's rough handling. He slowly crawled on his knees, picking up the fragments one by one and putting them together on a board. The figure soon lay there in its entirety, like one of those girls who, heartbroken and in despair, throw themselves off a monument and are shattered by the fall, only to be reassembled, looking both strange and sorrowful, to be taken to the morgue. Mahoudeau, sitting on the floor in front of his statue, couldn't take his eyes off it and became absorbed in deep, painful thought. However, his sobs eventually quieted, and he finally said with a long sigh: "I'll have to sculpt her lying down! There's no other option! Ah, my poor old woman, I had such a hard time getting her to stand, and I thought she looked so magnificent like that!"
But all at once Claude grew uneasy. What about his wedding? Mahoudeau must change his clothes. As he had no other frock-coat than the one he was wearing, he was obliged to make a jacket do. Then, the figure having been covered with linen wraps once more, like a corpse over which a sheet has been pulled, they both started off at a run. The stove was roaring away, the thaw filled the whole studio with water, and slush streamed from the old dust-begrimed plaster casts.
But suddenly, Claude felt anxious. What about his wedding? Mahoudeau needed to change his clothes. Since he didn't have any other suit jacket besides the one he was wearing, he had to make a regular jacket work. After covering the figure again with linen wraps, like a sheet over a corpse, they both took off running. The heater was blaring, the thaw had flooded the entire studio with water, and slush poured out from the old, dust-covered plaster casts.
When they reached the Rue de Douai there was no one there except little Jacques, in charge of the doorkeeper. Christine, tired of waiting, had just started off with the three others, thinking that there had been some mistake—that Claude might have told her that he would go straight to the mayor’s offices with Mahoudeau. The pair fell into a sharp trot, but only overtook Christine and their comrades in the Rue Drouot in front of the municipal edifice. They all went upstairs together, and as they were late they met with a very cool reception from the usher on duty. The wedding was got over in a few minutes, in a perfectly empty room. The mayor mumbled on, and the bride and bridegroom curtly uttered the binding ‘Yes,’ while their witnesses were marvelling at the bad taste of the appointments of the apartment. Once outside, Claude took Christine’s arm again, and that was all.
When they arrived at Rue de Douai, there was nobody there except little Jacques, who was with the doorkeeper. Christine, tired of waiting, had just decided to leave with the three others, thinking there had been a mistake—that Claude might have said he would head straight to the mayor’s office with Mahoudeau. The two of them started jogging and only caught up with Christine and their friends on Rue Drouot in front of the municipal building. They all went upstairs together, and since they were late, the usher on duty greeted them with a very cold reception. The wedding was wrapped up in a few minutes in a completely empty room. The mayor mumbled his words, and the bride and groom curtly said their binding ‘Yes,’ while their witnesses were quietly critiquing the poor taste of the room’s decor. Once they were outside, Claude took Christine’s arm again, and that was it.
It was pleasant walking in the clear frosty weather. Thus the party quietly went back on foot, climbing the Rue des Martyrs to reach the restaurant on the Boulevard de Clichy. A small private room had been engaged; the lunch was a very friendly affair, and not a word was said about the simple formality that had just been gone through; other subjects were spoken of all the while, as at one of their customary gatherings.
It was nice walking in the crisp, cold air. So, the group quietly walked back, climbing the Rue des Martyrs to get to the restaurant on the Boulevard de Clichy. They had booked a small private room; the lunch was a very friendly event, and no one mentioned the brief formalities they had just gone through. Instead, they chatted about other topics like they usually did at their gatherings.
It was thus that Christine, who in reality was very affected despite her pretended indifference, heard her husband and his friends excite themselves for three mortal hours about Mahoudeau’s unfortunate statue. Since the others had been made acquainted with the story, they kept harping on every particular of it. Sandoz thought the whole thing very wonderful; Jory and Gagnière discussed the strength of stays and trusses; the former mainly concerned about the monetary loss involved, and the other demonstrating with a chair that the statue might have been kept up. As for Mahoudeau, still very shaky and growing dazed; he complained of a stiffness which he had not felt before; his limbs began to hurt him, he had strained his muscles and bruised his skin as if he had been caught in the embrace of a stone siren. Christine washed the scratch on his cheek, which had begun to bleed again, and it seemed to her as if the mutilated bathing girl had sat down to table with them, as if she alone was of any importance that day; for she alone seemed to interest Claude, whose narrative, repeated a score of times, was full of endless particulars about the emotion he had felt on seeing that bosom and those hips of clay shattered at his feet.
It was in this way that Christine, who was actually very affected despite her feigned indifference, listened to her husband and his friends get worked up for three long hours over Mahoudeau's unfortunate statue. Since the others already knew the story, they kept focusing on every detail of it. Sandoz thought it was all really amazing; Jory and Gagnière debated the strength of supports and frameworks, with the former mostly worried about the financial loss involved, while the latter demonstrated with a chair that the statue could have been stabilized. As for Mahoudeau, still very shaky and feeling dazed, he complained of a stiffness he hadn’t felt before; his limbs started to hurt, and he had strained his muscles and bruised his skin as if he had been ensnared by a stone siren. Christine cleaned the scratch on his cheek, which had started to bleed again, and it felt to her as if the mutilated bathing girl had joined them at the table, as if she alone mattered that day; for she was the only one who seemed to interest Claude, whose story, repeated a dozen times, was full of endless details about the emotion he had felt when seeing that chest and those clay hips shattered at his feet.
However, at dessert there came a diversion, for Gagnière all at once remarked to Jory:
However, at dessert, there was a change, as Gagnière suddenly said to Jory:
‘By the way, I saw you with Mathilde the day before yesterday. Yes, yes, in the Rue Dauphine.’
‘By the way, I saw you with Mathilde the day before yesterday. Yeah, yeah, on Rue Dauphine.’
Jory, who had turned very red, tried to deny it; ‘Oh, a mere accidental meeting—honour bright!’ he stammered. ‘I don’t know where she hangs out, or I would tell you.’
Jory, who was blushing furiously, tried to deny it; ‘Oh, just a chance encounter—cross my heart!’ he stammered. ‘I don’t know where she spends her time, or I would tell you.’
‘What! is it you who are hiding her?’ exclaimed Mahoudeau. ‘Well, nobody wants to see her again!’
‘What! Are you the one hiding her?’ shouted Mahoudeau. ‘Well, no one wants to see her again!’
The truth was that Jory, throwing to the winds all his habits of prudence and parsimony, was now secretly providing for Mathilde. She had gained an ascendency over him by his vices.
The truth was that Jory, tossing aside all his habits of caution and frugality, was now secretly taking care of Mathilde. She had gained power over him through his weaknesses.
They still lingered at table, and night was falling when they escorted Mahoudeau to his own door. Claude and Christine, on reaching home, took Jacques from the doorkeeper, and found the studio quite chilly, wrapped in such dense gloom that they had to grope about for several minutes before they were able to light the lamp. They also had to light the stove again, and it struck seven o’clock before they were able to draw breath at their ease. They were not hungry, so they merely finished the remains of some boiled beef, mainly by way of encouraging the child to eat his soup; and when they had put him to bed, they settled themselves with the lamp betwixt them, as was their habit every evening.
They stayed at the table a bit longer, and by the time they walked Mahoudeau to his door, it was getting dark. When Claude and Christine got home, they picked up Jacques from the doorkeeper and found the studio pretty cold, wrapped in such thick darkness that they had to fumble around for several minutes before they could turn on the lamp. They also had to relight the stove, and it was seven o’clock by the time they could finally relax. They weren’t hungry, so they just warmed up some leftover boiled beef, mostly to encourage the child to eat his soup; and after they tucked him in, they settled down with the lamp between them, which was their usual routine every evening.
However, Christine had not put out any work, she felt too much moved to sew. She sat there with her hands resting idly on the table, looking at Claude, who on his side had at once become absorbed in a sketch, a bit of his picture, some workmen of the Port Saint Nicolas, unloading plaster. Invincible dreaminess came over the young woman, all sorts of recollections and regrets became apparent in the depths of her dim eyes; and by degrees growing sadness, great mute grief took absolute possession of her, amid the indifference, the boundless solitude into which she seemed to be drifting, although she was so near to Claude. He was, indeed, on the other side of the table, yet how far away she felt him to be! He was yonder before that point of the Cité, he was even farther still, in the infinite inaccessible regions of art; so far, indeed, that she would now never more be able to join him! She several times tried to start a conversation, but without eliciting any answer. The hours went by, she grew weary and numb with doing nothing, and she ended by taking out her purse and counting her money.
However, Christine hadn’t worked on anything; she felt too emotional to sew. She sat there with her hands resting idly on the table, watching Claude, who had become absorbed in a sketch—a part of his painting, depicting some workers at the Port Saint Nicolas unloading plaster. A deep sense of dreaminess washed over the young woman, bringing forth various memories and regrets reflected in her dim eyes. Gradually, a growing sadness, a profound silent grief took hold of her amidst the indifference and vast solitude into which she seemed to be drifting, even though she was so close to Claude. He was indeed just across the table, yet he felt so distant! He was over there by that point of the Cité, even farther away, in the endless, unreachable realms of art; so far, in fact, that she felt she would never be able to reach him again! She tried several times to start a conversation, but received no response. The hours passed, and she grew tired and numb from doing nothing, finally taking out her purse and counting her money.
‘Do you know how much we have to begin our married life with?’
‘Do you know how much we have to start our married life with?’
Claude did not even raise his head.
Claude didn't even lift his head.
‘We’ve nine sous. Ah! talk of poverty—’
‘We have nine sous. Ah! talk about being poor—’
He shrugged his shoulders, and finally growled: ‘We shall be rich some day; don’t fret.’
He shrugged and finally said, “We’ll be rich someday; don’t worry.”
Then the silence fell again, and she did not even attempt to break it, but gazed at her nine coppers laid in a row upon the table. At last, as it struck midnight, she shivered, ill with waiting and chilled by the cold.
Then silence fell again, and she didn’t even try to break it, but stared at her nine coins lined up on the table. Finally, as the clock struck midnight, she shivered, feeling sick from the wait and cold from the chill.
‘Let’s go to bed, dear,’ she murmured; ‘I’m dead tired.’
‘Let’s go to bed, honey,’ she whispered; ‘I’m so tired.’
He, however, was working frantically, and did not even hear her.
He was working frantically and didn’t even hear her.
‘The fire’s gone out,’ she began again, ‘we shall make ourselves ill; let’s go to bed.’
‘The fire’s gone out,’ she said again, ‘we’re going to get sick; let’s go to bed.’
Her imploring voice reached him at last, and made him start with sudden exasperation.
Her pleading voice finally reached him, causing him to jump with sudden frustration.
‘Oh! go if you like! You can see very well that I want to finish something!’
‘Oh! Go ahead if you want! You can clearly see that I’m trying to finish something!’
She remained there for another minute, amazed by his sudden anger, her face expressive of deep sorrow. Then, feeling that he would rather be without her, that the very presence of a woman doing nothing upset him, she rose from the table and went off, leaving the door wide open. Half an hour, three-quarters went by, nothing stirred, not a sound came from her room; but she was not asleep, her eyes were staring into the gloom; and at last she timidly ventured upon a final appeal, from the depths of the dark alcove.
She stayed there for another minute, shocked by his sudden anger, her face showing deep sadness. Then, realizing that he preferred to be alone, that having a woman just sitting there bothered him, she got up from the table and left, leaving the door wide open. Half an hour, then three-quarters went by, and nothing moved, not a sound came from her room; but she wasn’t asleep, her eyes were fixed on the darkness; and finally, she hesitantly made one last appeal from the shadows of the dark alcove.
An oath was the only reply she received. And nothing stirred after that. She perhaps dozed off. The cold in the studio grew keener, and the wick of the lamp began to carbonise and burn red, while Claude, still bending over his sketch, did not seem conscious of the passing minutes.
An oath was the only response she got. And nothing moved after that. She might have dozed off. The chill in the studio got sharper, and the lamp's wick started to char and glow red, while Claude, still focused on his sketch, didn’t seem aware of the time passing.
At two o’clock, however, he rose up, furious to find the lamp going out for lack of oil. He only had time to take it into the other room, so that he might not have to undress in the dark. But his displeasure increased on seeing that Christine’s eyes were wide open. He felt inclined to complain of it. However, after some random remarks, he suddenly exclaimed:
At two o’clock, though, he got up, angry to see the lamp going out because it was low on oil. He only had enough time to move it to the other room, so he wouldn’t have to undress in the dark. But his irritation grew when he noticed that Christine’s eyes were wide open. He wanted to say something about it. However, after making a few offhand comments, he suddenly blurted out:
‘The most surprising thing is that her trunk wasn’t hurt!’
‘The most surprising thing is that her trunk was fine!’
‘What do you mean?’ asked Christine, in amazement.
‘What do you mean?’ Christine asked, amazed.
‘Why, Mahoudeau’s girl,’ he answered.
"Why, it's Mahoudeau's girl," he replied.
At this she shook nervously, turned and buried her face in the pillow; and he was quite surprised on hearing her burst into sobs.
At this, she shook nervously, turned, and buried her face in the pillow; and he was quite surprised to hear her burst into sobs.
‘What! you are crying?’ he exclaimed.
"Wait! Are you crying?" he exclaimed.
She was choking, sobbing with heart-rending violence.
She was choking and crying hard.
‘Come, what’s the matter with you?—I’ve said nothing to you. Come, darling, what’s the matter?’
‘Come on, what’s wrong with you?—I haven’t said anything to you. Come on, babe, what’s going on?’
But, while he was speaking, the cause of her great grief dawned upon him. No doubt, on a day like that, he ought to have shown more affection; but his neglect was unintentional enough; he had not even given the matter a thought. She surely knew him, said he; he became a downright brute when he was at work. Then he bent over and embraced her. But it was as if something irreparable had taken place, as if something had for ever snapped, leaving a void between them. The formality of marriage seemed to have killed love.
But as he spoke, he realized the reason for her deep sadness. He knew he should have been more affectionate on a day like this; however, his neglect was completely unintentional; he hadn't even considered it. She must understand him, he thought; he turned into a total jerk when he was focused on work. Then he leaned down and hugged her. But it felt like something irreparable had happened, as if a bond had permanently broken, leaving an emptiness between them. The formality of marriage appeared to have extinguished their love.
IX
AS Claude could not paint his huge picture in the small studio of the Rue de Douai, he made up his mind to rent some shed that would be spacious enough, elsewhere; and strolling one day on the heights of Montmartre, he found what he wanted half way down the slope of the Rue Tourlaque, a street that descends abruptly behind the cemetery, and whence one overlooks Clichy as far as the marshes of Gennevilliers. It had been a dyer’s drying shed, and was nearly fifty feet long and more than thirty broad, with walls of board and plaster admitting the wind from every point of the compass. The place was let to him for three hundred francs. Summer was at hand; he would soon work off his picture and then quit.
AS Claude couldn't paint his large artwork in the small studio on Rue de Douai, he decided to rent a bigger place elsewhere. One day, while walking on the heights of Montmartre, he found what he was looking for halfway down the slope of Rue Tourlaque, a street that drops steeply behind the cemetery, allowing a view of Clichy all the way to the marshes of Gennevilliers. It had been a drying shed for a dyer and was nearly fifty feet long and more than thirty wide, with walls made of wood and plaster that let the wind in from all directions. The place was rented to him for three hundred francs. Summer was approaching; he would finish his painting soon and then move on.
This settled, feverish with hope, Claude decided to go to all the necessary expenses; as fortune was certain to come in the end, why trammel its advent by unnecessary scruples? Taking advantage of his right, he broke in upon the principal of his income, and soon grew accustomed to spend money without counting. At first he kept the matter from Christine, for she had already twice stopped him from doing so; and when he was at last obliged to tell her, she also, after a week of reproaches and apprehension, fell in with it, happy at the comfort in which she lived, and yielding to the pleasure of always having a little money in her purse. Thus there came a few years of easy unconcern.
This settled, filled with hope, Claude decided to cover all the necessary expenses; since fortune was sure to come in the end, why hold back its arrival with unnecessary doubts? Taking advantage of his right, he dipped into his income and quickly got used to spending money without keeping track. At first, he hid this from Christine, as she had already stopped him from doing so twice; and when he finally had to tell her, she, after a week of reproaches and worries, went along with it, happy with the comfort in which they lived and enjoying the pleasure of always having a little money in her purse. Thus, there followed a few years of easygoing bliss.
Claude soon became altogether absorbed in his picture. He had furnished the huge studio in a very summary style: a few chairs, the old couch from the Quai de Bourbon, and a deal table bought second-hand for five francs sufficed him. In the practice of his art he was entirely devoid of that vanity which delights in luxurious surroundings. The only real expense to which he went was that of buying some steps on castors, with a platform and a movable footboard. Next he busied himself about his canvas, which he wished to be six and twenty feet in length and sixteen in height. He insisted upon preparing it himself; ordered a framework and bought the necessary seamless canvas, which he and a couple of friends had all the work in the world to stretch properly by the aid of pincers. Then he just coated the canvas with ceruse, laid on with a palette-knife, refusing to size it previously, in order that it might remain absorbent, by which method he declared that the painting would be bright and solid. An easel was not to be thought of. It would not have been possible to move a canvas of such dimensions on it. So he invented a system of ropes and beams, which held it slightly slanting against the wall in a cheerful light. And backwards and forwards in front of the big white surface rolled the steps, looking like an edifice, like the scaffolding by means of which a cathedral is to be reared.
Claude quickly became completely focused on his painting. He had furnished the large studio in a very basic way: a few chairs, an old couch from the Quai de Bourbon, and a second-hand table he bought for five francs were all he needed. In his artistic practice, he was entirely free of the vanity that thrives on luxurious surroundings. The only real splurge he made was on a set of wheeled steps, complete with a platform and a movable footboard. Then he got busy with his canvas, which he wanted to be twenty-six feet long and sixteen feet high. He insisted on preparing it himself; he ordered a frame and bought the necessary seamless canvas, which he and a couple of friends worked hard to stretch properly using pincers. Next, he simply coated the canvas with white lead paint, applying it with a palette knife, refusing to size it beforehand to keep it absorbent, claiming this would make the painting bright and solid. An easel was out of the question; it would be impossible to move a canvas of that size on one. So, he came up with a system of ropes and beams that held it at a slight angle against the wall in good light. Up and down in front of the big white surface moved the steps, resembling a structure, like the scaffolding used to build a cathedral.
But when everything was ready, Claude once more experienced misgivings. An idea that he had perhaps not chosen the proper light in which to paint his picture fidgeted him. Perhaps an early morning effect would have been better? Perhaps, too, he ought to have chosen a dull day, and so he went back to the Pont des Saint-Pères, and lived there for another three months.
But when everything was ready, Claude once again felt uneasy. He couldn't shake the thought that he might not have picked the right lighting for his painting. Wouldn't an early morning look have worked better? Maybe he should have gone for a cloudy day instead, so he returned to the Pont des Saint-Pères and stayed there for another three months.
The Cité rose up before him, between the two arms of the river, at all hours and in all weather. After a late fall of snow he beheld it wrapped in ermine, standing above mud-coloured water, against a light slatey sky. On the first sunshiny days he saw it cleanse itself of everything that was wintry and put on an aspect of youth, when verdure sprouted from the lofty trees which rose from the ground below the bridge. He saw it, too, on a somewhat misty day recede to a distance and almost evaporate, delicate and quivering, like a fairy palace. Then, again, there were pelting rains, which submerged it, hid it as with a huge curtain drawn from the sky to the earth; storms, with lightning flashes which lent it a tawny hue, the opaque light of some cut-throat place half destroyed by the fall of the huge copper-coloured clouds; and there were winds that swept over it tempestuously, sharpening its angles and making it look hard, bare, and beaten against the pale blue sky. Then, again, when the sunbeams broke into dust amidst the vapours of the Seine, it appeared steeped in diffused brightness, without a shadow about it, lighted up equally on every side, and looking as charmingly delicate as a cut gem set in fine gold. He insisted on beholding it when the sun was rising and transpiercing the morning mists, when the Quai de l’Horloge flushes and the Quai des Orfèvres remains wrapt in gloom; when, up in the pink sky, it is already full of life, with the bright awakening of its towers and spires, while night, similar to a falling cloak, slides slowly from its lower buildings. He beheld it also at noon, when the sunrays fall on it vertically, when a crude glare bites into it, and it becomes discoloured and mute like a dead city, retaining nought but the life of heat, the quiver that darts over its distant housetops. He beheld it, moreover, beneath the setting sun, surrendering itself to the night which was slowly rising from the river, with the salient edges of its buildings still fringed with a glow as of embers, and with final conflagrations rekindling in its windows, from whose panes leapt tongue-like flashes. But in presence of those twenty different aspects of the Cité, no matter what the hour or the weather might be, he ever came back to the Cité that he had seen the first time, at about four o’clock one fine September afternoon, a Cité all serenity under a gentle breeze, a Cité which typified the heart of Paris beating in the limpid atmosphere, and seemingly enlarged by the vast stretch of sky which a flight of cloudlets crossed.
The Cité rose up before him, nestled between the two arms of the river, at all hours and in all weather. After a late snowfall, he saw it wrapped in white, standing above muddy water against a light gray sky. On the first sunny days, he watched it shake off the winter and take on a youthful appearance, as greenery sprouted from the tall trees rising from the ground below the bridge. He also saw it on a slightly misty day, where it seemed to fade into the distance and almost vanish, delicate and shimmering like a fairy palace. Then, there were heavy rains that swallowed it up, hiding it like a giant curtain pulled from the sky down to the earth; storms with flashes of lightning gave it a brownish hue, the gloomy light of a dangerous place nearly destroyed by the looming copper-colored clouds; and fierce winds swept over it, sharpening its edges and making it look hard, bare, and battered against the pale blue sky. Again, when the sunbeams broke into particles amid the Seine's fog, it appeared bathed in bright light, without a shadow in sight, illuminated from every direction, and looking as stunningly delicate as a cut gemstone set in fine gold. He was determined to see it when the sun was rising, piercing through the morning mist, when the Quai de l’Horloge glowed and the Quai des Orfèvres remained shrouded in darkness; up in the pink sky, it was already full of life, with its towers and spires brightly awakening, as night, like a falling cloak, slowly slipped away from its lower buildings. He also saw it at noon, when the sun's rays hit it directly, when an intense glare overwhelmed it, making it look faded and silent like a dead city, retaining only the heat's life, the shimmer that danced over its distant rooftops. Furthermore, he saw it under the setting sun, surrendering to the night that was gradually rising from the river, with the sharp edges of its buildings still glowing like embers, and with final sparks lighting up its windows, from which flashes leaped like tongues. Yet, amidst those twenty different aspects of the Cité, regardless of the hour or the weather, he always returned to the Cité he had first seen, at around four o'clock on a lovely September afternoon, a Cité all serene under a gentle breeze, representing the heart of Paris beating in the clear atmosphere, seemingly expanded by the vast sky crossed by a flight of little clouds.
Claude spent his time under the Pont des Saints-Pères, which he had made his shelter, his home, his roof. The constant din of the vehicles overhead, similar to the distant rumbling of thunder, no longer disturbed him. Settling himself against the first abutment, beneath the huge iron arches, he took sketches and painted studies. The employes of the river navigation service, whose offices were hard by, got to know him, and, indeed, the wife of an inspector, who lived in a sort of tarred cabin with her husband, two children, and a cat, kept his canvases for him, to save him the trouble of carrying them to and fro each day. It became his joy to remain in that secluded nook beneath Paris, which rumbled in the air above him, whose ardent life he ever felt rolling overhead. He at first became passionately interested in Port St. Nicolas, with its ceaseless bustle suggesting that of a distant genuine seaport. The steam crane, The Sophia, worked regularly, hauling up blocks of stone; tumbrels arrived to fetch loads of sand; men and horses pulled, panting for breath on the big paving-stones, which sloped down as far as the water, to a granite margin, alongside which two rows of lighters and barges were moored. For weeks Claude worked hard at a study of some lightermen unloading a cargo of plaster, carrying white sacks on their shoulders, leaving a white pathway behind them, and bepowdered with white themselves, whilst hard by the coal removed from another barge had stained the waterside with a huge inky smear. Then he sketched the silhouette of a swimming-bath on the left bank, together with a floating wash-house somewhat in the rear, showing the windows open and the washerwomen kneeling in a row, on a level with the stream, and beating their dirty linen. In the middle of the river, he studied a boat which a waterman sculled over the stern; then, farther behind, a steamer of the towing service straining its chain, and dragging a series of rafts loaded with barrels and boards up stream. The principal backgrounds had been sketched a long while ago, still he did several bits over again—the two arms of the Seine, and a sky all by itself, into which rose only towers and spires gilded by the sun. And under the hospitable bridge, in that nook as secluded as some far-off cleft in a rock, he was rarely disturbed by anybody. Anglers passed by with contemptuous unconcern. His only companion was virtually the overseer’s cat, who cleaned herself in the sunlight, ever placid beneath the tumult of the world overhead.
Claude spent his time under the Pont des Saints-Pères, which he had turned into his shelter, home, and roof. The constant noise of vehicles overhead, reminiscent of distant thunder, no longer bothered him. Propping himself against the first column, beneath the massive iron arches, he sketched and painted. The employees of the river navigation service, whose offices were nearby, came to know him, and the wife of an inspector, who lived in a little tarred cabin with her husband, two kids, and a cat, kept his canvases for him to save him the trouble of carrying them back and forth every day. He found joy in that quiet spot beneath Paris, which rumbled in the air above him, with its vibrant life constantly rolling overhead. At first, he became really interested in Port St. Nicolas, with its nonstop activity reminiscent of a distant real seaport. The steam crane, The Sophia, worked regularly, lifting large blocks of stone; trucks arrived to pick up loads of sand; men and horses strained as they pulled on the large paving stones, which sloped down to the water’s edge, next to a granite bank lined with two rows of barges and boats. For weeks, Claude worked hard on a study of some lightermen unloading cargo of plaster, carrying white sacks on their shoulders, leaving a white trail behind them, and covered in white dust themselves, while nearby, the coal removed from another barge had stained the waterside with a large inky mark. Then he sketched the outline of a swimming pool on the left bank, along with a floating wash-house a little further back, showing the windows open and the washerwomen kneeling in a row, level with the river, beating their dirty laundry. In the middle of the river, he studied a boat that a waterman was sculling from the back; then, further behind, a towing steamer straining at its chain, pulling a series of rafts loaded with barrels and planks upstream. The main backgrounds had been sketched a while ago, but he repeated some details—the two arms of the Seine and a sky all by itself, where only towers and spires glinted in the sunlight. And under the welcoming bridge, in that spot as isolated as a faraway cleft in a rock, he was rarely disturbed by anyone. Anglers passed by without a second glance. His only companion was practically the overseer’s cat, who groomed herself in the sun, always calm beneath the chaos of the world above.
At last Claude had all his materials ready. In a few days he threw off an outline sketch of the whole, and the great work was begun. However, the first battle between himself and his huge canvas raged in the Rue Tourlaque throughout the summer; for he obstinately insisted upon personally attending to all the technical calculations of his composition, and he failed to manage them, getting into constant muddles about the slightest deviation from mathematical accuracy, of which he had no experience. It made him indignant with himself. So he let it go, deciding to make what corrections might be necessary afterwards. He covered his canvas with a rush—in such a fever as to live all day on his steps, brandishing huge brushes, and expending as much muscular force as if he were anxious to move mountains. And when evening came he reeled about like a drunken man, and fell asleep as soon as he had swallowed his last mouthful of food. His wife even had to put him to bed like a child. From those heroic efforts, however, sprang a masterly first draught in which genius blazed forth amidst the somewhat chaotic masses of colour. Bongrand, who came to look at it, caught the painter in his big arms, and stifled him with embraces, his eyes full of tears. Sandoz, in his enthusiasm, gave a dinner; the others, Jory, Mahoudeau and Gagnière, again went about announcing a masterpiece. As for Fagerolles, he remained motionless before the painting for a moment, then burst into congratulations, pronouncing it too beautiful.
At last, Claude had all his materials ready. Within a few days, he put together an outline sketch of the whole piece, and the great work was underway. However, the initial struggle between him and his massive canvas raged in the Rue Tourlaque throughout the summer. He stubbornly insisted on personally handling all the technical aspects of his composition, but he kept getting mixed up with even the smallest details of mathematical precision, which he had no experience with. This made him feel frustrated with himself. So, he decided to let it go, planning to make any necessary corrections later. He hurriedly covered his canvas, working with such intensity that he spent all day on his feet, wielding huge brushes and exerting as much physical effort as if he were trying to move mountains. By evening, he stumbled around like a drunk, falling asleep as soon as he finished his last bite of food. His wife even had to help him to bed like a child. From those intense efforts, however, emerged a masterful first draft where genius shone through the somewhat chaotic splashes of color. Bongrand, who came to see it, scooped the painter up in his big arms, squeezing him tightly with tears in his eyes. Sandoz, filled with excitement, threw a dinner party; the others, Jory, Mahoudeau, and Gagnière, went around declaring it a masterpiece. As for Fagerolles, he stood silent before the painting for a moment, then erupted in praise, calling it too beautiful.
And, in fact, subsequently, as if the irony of that successful trickster had brought him bad luck, Claude only spoilt his original draught. It was the old story over again. He spent himself in one effort, one magnificent dash; he failed to bring out all the rest; he did not know how to finish. He fell into his former impotence; for two years he lived before that picture only, having no feeling for anything else. At times he was in a seventh heaven of exuberant joy; at others flung to earth, so wretched, so distracted by doubt, that dying men gasping in their beds in a hospital were happier than himself. Twice already had he failed to be ready for the Salon, for invariably, at the last moment, when he hoped to have finished in a few sittings, he found some void, felt his composition crack and crumble beneath his fingers. When the third Salon drew nigh, there came a terrible crisis; he remained for a fortnight without going to his studio in the Rue Tourlaque, and when he did so, it was as to a house desolated by death. He turned the huge canvas to the wall and rolled his steps into a corner; he would have smashed and burned everything if his faltering hands had found strength enough. Nothing more existed; amid a blast of anger he swept the floor clean, and spoke of setting to work at little things, since he was incapable of perfecting paintings of any size.
And, in fact, later on, as if the irony of that successful trickster had brought him bad luck, Claude only ruined his original draft. It was the same old story all over again. He put all his effort into one attempt, one impressive push; he couldn't bring out the rest; he didn't know how to finish. He fell back into his previous helplessness; for two years, he focused solely on that painting, feeling nothing for anything else. Sometimes he was on cloud nine, full of joy; other times he felt crushed, so miserable and so lost in doubt that dying people gasping in their beds in a hospital were happier than he was. He had already missed the deadline for the Salon twice because, in the end, when he thought he could finish in just a few sessions, he discovered some emptiness, sensing his composition crack and fall apart under his fingers. As the third Salon approached, a terrible crisis hit; he went for two weeks without visiting his studio on Rue Tourlaque, and when he finally did, it felt like a house haunted by death. He turned the huge canvas to the wall and retreated to a corner; he would have smashed and burned everything if his trembling hands had had enough strength. Nothing else mattered anymore; in a fit of rage, he cleared the floor and talked about working on smaller things since he felt incapable of completing any large paintings.
In spite of himself, his first idea of a picture on a smaller scale took him back to the Cité. Why should not he paint a simple view, on a moderate sized canvas? But a kind of shame, mingled with strange jealousy, prevented him from settling himself in his old spot under the Pont des Saints-Pères. It seemed to him as if that spot were sacred now; that he ought not to offer any outrage to his great work, dead as it was. So he stationed himself at the end of the bank, above the bridge. This time, at any rate, he would work directly from nature; and he felt happy at not having to resort to any trickery, as was unavoidable with works of a large size. The small picture, very carefully painted, more highly finished than usual, met, however, with the same fate as the others before the hanging committee, who were indignant with this style of painting, executed with a tipsy brush, as was said at the time in the studios. The slap in the face which Claude thus received was all the more severe, as a report had spread of concessions, of advances made by him to the School of Arts, in order that his work might be received. And when the picture came back to him, he, deeply wounded, weeping with rage, tore it into narrow shreds, which he burned in his stove. It was not sufficient that he should kill that one with a knife-thrust, it must be annihilated.
In spite of himself, his first thought of a smaller painting took him back to the Cité. Why shouldn’t he create a simple scene on a medium-sized canvas? But a mix of shame and strange jealousy kept him from settling in his old spot under the Pont des Saints-Pères. It felt to him like that place was sacred now; he shouldn’t desecrate his great work, dead as it was. So he positioned himself at the end of the bank, above the bridge. This time, at least, he would work directly from nature; and he felt content not to rely on any tricks, which were necessary for larger works. The small painting, done with great care and more refined than usual, though, faced the same fate as his earlier pieces before the hanging committee, who were outraged by this style of painting, executed with a “tipsy brush,” as was said in the studios at the time. The blow Claude received was even harsher because a rumor had spread about him making concessions and advances to the School of Arts to get his work accepted. And when the painting was returned to him, he, deeply hurt and crying with anger, tore it into thin strips and burned them in his stove. It wasn’t enough for him to kill that one with a knife-thrust; it must be completely destroyed.
Another year went by for Claude in desultory toil. He worked from force of habit, but finished nothing; he himself saying, with a dolorous laugh, that he had lost himself, and was trying to find himself again. In reality, tenacious consciousness of his genius left him a hope which nothing could destroy, even during his longest crises of despondency. He suffered like some one damned, for ever rolling the rock which slipped back and crushed him; but the future remained, with the certainty of one day seizing that rock in his powerful arms and flinging it upward to the stars. His friends at last beheld his eyes light up with passion once more. It was known that he again secluded himself in the Rue Tourlaque. He who formerly had always been carried beyond the work on which he was engaged, by some dream of a picture to come, now stood at bay before that subject of the Cité. It had become his fixed idea—the bar that closed up his life. And soon he began to speak freely of it again in a new blaze of enthusiasm, exclaiming, with childish delight, that he had found his way and that he felt certain of victory.
Another year passed for Claude in scattered labor. He worked out of habit, but accomplished nothing; he himself said, with a sad laugh, that he had lost himself and was trying to find himself again. In reality, his strong awareness of his talent gave him a hope that nothing could destroy, even during his longest bouts of sadness. He suffered like someone doomed, forever pushing a boulder that rolled back and crushed him; but the future remained, with the certainty that one day he would seize that boulder in his strong arms and toss it upward to the stars. His friends finally saw his eyes light up with passion once more. It was known that he had retreated again to Rue Tourlaque. He who used to be carried away from his work by some dream of an upcoming painting now stood firm before that subject of the Cité. It had become his obsession—the barrier that confined his life. And soon he began to talk freely about it again with a new surge of enthusiasm, exclaiming, with childlike joy, that he had found his path and felt sure of victory.
One day Claude, who, so far, had not opened his door to his friends, condescended to admit Sandoz. The latter tumbled upon a study with a deal of dash in it, thrown off without a model, and again admirable in colour. The subject had remained the same—the Port St. Nicolas on the left, the swimming-baths on the right, the Seine and Cité in the background. But Sandoz was amazed at perceiving, instead of the boat sculled by a waterman, another large skiff taking up the whole centre of the composition—a skiff occupied by three women. One, in a bathing costume, was rowing; another sat over the edge with her legs dangling in the water, her costume partially unfastened, showing her bare shoulder; while the third stood erect and nude at the prow, so bright in tone that she seemed effulgent, like the sun.
One day, Claude, who until then hadn't let any of his friends in, finally decided to invite Sandoz in. Sandoz walked into a studio that was full of energy and creativity, done without any reference, and once again impressive in color. The theme was still the same—Port St. Nicolas on the left, the swimming pools on the right, with the Seine and Cité in the background. But Sandoz was surprised to see, instead of a boat being rowed by a waterman, a large skiff in the center of the composition occupied by three women. One was in a bathing suit, rowing; another was sitting on the edge with her legs hanging in the water, her suit slightly undone, revealing her bare shoulder; while the third was standing upright and nude at the front, so vibrant in color that she seemed to radiate like the sun.
‘Why, what an idea!’ muttered Sandoz. ‘What are those women doing there?’
‘Wow, what a thought!’ Sandoz mumbled. ‘What are those women doing there?’
‘Why, they are bathing,’ Claude quietly answered. ‘Don’t you see that they have come out of the swimming-baths? It supplies me with a motive for the nude; it’s a real find, eh? Does it shock you?’
‘Well, they are bathing,’ Claude quietly replied. ‘Can’t you see that they’ve just come out of the swimming baths? It gives me a reason for the nude; it’s a true discovery, right? Does it surprise you?’
His old friend, who knew him well by now, dreaded lest he should give him cause for discouragement.
His old friend, who knew him well by now, worried that he might give him a reason for discouragement.
‘I? Oh, no! Only I am afraid that the public will again fail to understand. That nude woman in the very midst of Paris—it’s improbable.’
‘Me? Oh, no! I’m just worried that people won’t get it again. That naked woman right in the heart of Paris—it seems unlikely.’
Claude looked naively surprised.
Claude looked genuinely surprised.
‘Ah! you think so? Well, so much the worse. What’s the odds, as long as the woman is well painted? Besides, I need something like that to get my courage up.’
‘Oh, you think so? Well, that’s too bad. What does it matter, as long as the woman is beautifully depicted? Besides, I need something like that to boost my confidence.’
On the following occasions, Sandoz gently reverted to the strangeness of the composition, pleading, as was his nature, the cause of outraged logic. How could a modern painter who prided himself on painting merely what was real—how could he so bastardise his work as to introduce fanciful things into it? It would have been so easy to choose another subject, in which the nude would have been necessary. But Claude became obstinate, and resorted to lame and violent explanations, for he would not avow his real motive: an idea which had come to him and which he would have been at a loss to express clearly. It was, however, a longing for some secret symbolism. A recrudescence of romanticism made him see an incarnation of Paris in that nude figure; he pictured the city bare and impassioned, resplendent with the beauty of woman.
On the next occasions, Sandoz gently returned to the oddness of the painting, arguing, as was his nature, the case of offended logic. How could a modern painter who prided himself on depicting only what was real—how could he distort his work by adding imaginary elements? It would have been so simple to pick another subject where the nude would have made sense. But Claude became stubborn, and fell back on weak and extreme justifications, because he wouldn’t admit his true motive: an idea that had come to him which he struggled to articulate clearly. It was, however, a desire for some hidden symbolism. A resurgence of romanticism made him see a representation of Paris in that nude figure; he imagined the city vulnerable and passionate, radiant with the beauty of woman.
Before the pressing objections of his friend he pretended to be shaken in his resolutions.
Before his friend's strong objections, he feigned uncertainty in his decisions.
‘Well, I’ll see; I’ll dress my old woman later on, since she worries you,’ he said. ‘But meanwhile I shall do her like that. You understand, she amuses me.’
‘Well, I’ll see; I’ll get my old lady ready later, since she worries you,’ he said. ‘But for now, I’ll keep her like that. You see, she entertains me.’
He never reverted to the subject again, remaining silently obstinate, merely shrugging his shoulders and smiling with embarrassment whenever any allusion betrayed the general astonishment which was felt at the sight of that Venus emerging triumphantly from the froth of the Seine amidst all the omnibuses on the quays and the lightermen working at the Port of St. Nicolas.
He never brought the topic up again, staying quietly stubborn, just shrugging his shoulders and smiling awkwardly whenever any mention revealed the general shock everyone felt at the sight of that Venus triumphantly rising from the foam of the Seine, surrounded by all the buses on the riverbanks and the men working at the Port of St. Nicolas.
Spring had come round again, and Claude had once more resolved to work at his large picture, when in a spirit of prudence he and Christine modified their daily life. She, at times, could not help feeling uneasy at seeing all their money so quickly spent. Since the supply had seemed inexhaustible, they had ceased counting. But, at the end of four years, they had woke up one morning quite frightened, when, on asking for accounts, they found that barely three thousand francs were left out of the twenty thousand. They immediately reverted to severe economy, stinting themselves as to bread, planning the cutting down of the most elementary expenses; and it was thus that, in the first impulse of self-sacrifice, they left the Rue de Douai. What was the use of paying two rents? There was room enough in the old drying-shed in the Rue Tourlaque—still stained with the dyes of former days—to afford accommodation for three people. Settling there was, nevertheless, a difficult affair; for however big the place was, it provided them, after all, with but one room. It was like a gipsy’s shed, where everything had to be done in common. As the landlord was unwilling, the painter himself had to divide it at one end by a partition of boards, behind which he devised a kitchen and a bedroom. They were then delighted with the place, despite the chinks through which the wind blew, and although on rainy days they had to set basins beneath the broader cracks in the roof. The whole looked mournfully bare; their few poor sticks seemed to dance alongside the naked walls. They themselves pretended to be proud at being lodged so spaciously; they told their friends that Jacques would at least have a little room to run about. Poor Jacques, in spite of his nine years, did not seem to be growing; his head alone became larger and larger. They could not send him to school for more than a week at a stretch, for he came back absolutely dazed, ill from having tried to learn, in such wise that they nearly always allowed him to live on all fours around them, crawling from one corner to another.
Spring had rolled around again, and Claude had once more decided to work on his big painting, but in a moment of caution, he and Christine changed their daily routine. She occasionally felt anxious seeing their money dwindle so quickly. Since it had seemed unlimited, they had stopped keeping track. Yet, after four years, they woke up one morning alarmed to discover that barely three thousand francs were left from the original twenty thousand. They immediately returned to strict budgeting, cutting back on bread and planning to reduce even the most basic expenses; thus, in a sudden act of self-denial, they moved out of the Rue de Douai. What was the point of paying two rents? There was enough space in the old drying shed on Rue Tourlaque—still marked with stains from previous dye jobs—to house three people. However, settling in was still tricky; despite its size, it offered just one room. It felt like a gypsy’s shed, where everything had to be shared. The landlord was unwilling, so the painter himself had to put up a board partition at one end, which he turned into a kitchen and bedroom. Despite the drafts and the need to place basins under the larger leaks in the roof on rainy days, they were happy with the place. It looked sadly bare; their few meager belongings seemed to dance next to the bare walls. They pretended to feel proud about their spacious living situation, telling friends that Jacques would at least have some room to run around. Poor Jacques, despite being nine years old, didn’t seem to be growing; only his head got bigger. They couldn’t send him to school for more than a week at a time because he came back completely overwhelmed and sick from trying to learn, so they usually let him crawl around them on all fours, moving from one corner to another.
Christine, who for quite a long while had not shared Claude’s daily work, now once more found herself beside him throughout his long hours of toil. She helped him to scrape and pumice the old canvas of the big picture, and gave him advice about attaching it more securely to the wall. But they found that another disaster had befallen them—the steps had become warped by the water constantly trickling through the roof, and, for fear of an accident, Claude had to strengthen them with an oak cross-piece, she handing him the necessary nails one by one. Then once more, and for the second time, everything was ready. She watched him again outlining the work, standing behind him the while, till she felt faint with fatigue, and finally dropping to the floor, where she remained squatting, and still looking at him.
Christine, who hadn't been working alongside Claude for a while, now found herself back with him during his long hours of labor. She helped him scrape and smooth the old canvas of the big painting and offered advice on how to secure it better to the wall. But they discovered another problem—the steps had warped from the constant water dripping through the roof, and to avoid an accident, Claude had to reinforce them with an oak crosspiece, while she handed him the nails one by one. Once again, everything was ready. She watched him outline the work, standing behind him until she felt faint with exhaustion and finally dropped to the floor, where she remained squatting, still watching him.
Ah! how she would have liked to snatch him from that painting which had seized hold of him! It was for that purpose that she made herself his servant, only too happy to lower herself to a labourer’s toil. Since she shared his work again, since the three of them, he, she, and the canvas, were side by side, her hope revived. If he had escaped her when she, all alone, cried her eyes out in the Rue de Douai, if he lingered till late in the Rue Tourlaque, fascinated as by a mistress, perhaps now that she was present she might regain her hold over him. Ah, painting, painting! in what jealous hatred she held it! Hers was no longer the revolt of a girl of the bourgeoisie, who painted neatly in water-colours, against independent, brutal, magnificent art. No, little by little she had come to understand it, drawn towards it at first by her love for the painter, and gained over afterwards by the feast of light, by the original charm of the bright tints which Claude’s works displayed. And now she had accepted everything, even lilac-tinted soil and blue trees. Indeed, a kind of respect made her quiver before those works which had at first seemed so horrid to her. She recognised their power well enough, and treated them like rivals about whom one could no longer joke. But her vindictiveness grew in proportion to her admiration; she revolted at having to stand by and witness, as it were, a diminution of herself, the blow of another love beneath her own roof.
Ah! how she wished she could pull him away from that painting that had captured him! That’s why she became his servant, only too glad to lower herself to a laborer’s work. Now that they were working together again, with him, her, and the canvas all side by side, her hope returned. If he had escaped her when she cried her eyes out alone in the Rue de Douai, if he hung around late in the Rue Tourlaque, captivated as if by a lover, maybe now that she was there, she could win him back. Ah, painting, painting! how she hated it with such jealousy! Her feelings were no longer those of a bourgeois girl, neatly painting in watercolors, rebelling against bold, powerful, magnificent art. No, little by little she came to understand it, initially drawn in by her love for the painter and later won over by the feast of light, by the original allure of the bright colors in Claude’s works. And now she accepted everything, even lilac-tinted soil and blue trees. In fact, she felt a kind of respect that made her tremble before works that had once seemed so awful to her. She recognized their power well enough, treating them like rivals no longer fit for jokes. But her resentment grew in line with her admiration; she resented standing by and witnessing what felt like a diminishing of herself, the sting of another love under her own roof.
At first there was a silent struggle of every minute. She thrust herself forward, interposed whatever she could, a hand, a shoulder, between the painter and his picture. She was always there, encompassing him with her breath, reminding him that he was hers. Then her old idea revived—she also would paint; she would seek and join him in the depths of his art fever. Every day for a whole month she put on a blouse, and worked like a pupil by the side of a master, diligently copying one of his sketches, and she only gave in when she found the effort turn against her object; for, deceived, as it were, by their joint work, he finished by forgetting that she was a woman, and lived with her on a footing of mere comradeship as between man and man. Accordingly she resorted to what was her only strength.
At first, every minute felt like a silent struggle. She pushed herself forward, putting whatever she could—a hand, a shoulder—between the painter and his canvas. She was always there, surrounding him with her presence, reminding him that he belonged to her. Then her old idea came back—she would also paint; she would dive into the depths of his artistic passion alongside him. Every day for an entire month, she wore a blouse and worked like a student next to a master, carefully copying one of his sketches. She only gave up when she realized the effort was working against her goal; deceived by their joint work, he ended up forgetting she was a woman and treated her as just a buddy, as if they were two men. So, she turned to what was her only strength.
To perfect some of the small figures of his latter pictures, Claude had many a time already taken the hint of a head, the pose of an arm, the attitude of a body from Christine. He threw a cloak over her shoulders, and caught her in the posture he wanted, shouting to her not to stir. These were little services which she showed herself only too pleased to render him, but she had not hitherto cared to go further, for she was hurt by the idea of being a model now that she was his wife. However, since Claude had broadly outlined the large upright female figure which was to occupy the centre of his picture, Christine had looked at the vague silhouette in a dreamy way, worried by an ever-pursuing thought before which all scruples vanished. And so, when he spoke of taking a model, she offered herself, reminding him that she had posed for the figure in the ‘Open Air’ subject, long ago. ‘A model,’ she added, ‘would cost you seven francs a sitting. We are not so rich, we may as well save the money.’
To perfect some of the smaller details in his later paintings, Claude had often taken inspiration from Christine's head poses, arm positions, and body stances. He draped a cloak over her shoulders and positioned her the way he wanted, telling her not to move. She was more than happy to help him with these little tasks, but she had been reluctant to go further, feeling uncomfortable about being a model now that she was his wife. However, once Claude had sketched out the large upright female figure meant to be at the center of his painting, Christine gazed at the vague outline dreamily, troubled by a persistent thought that made all her reservations fade away. So, when he mentioned needing a model, she volunteered, reminding him that she had posed for the figure in the ‘Open Air’ piece a long time ago. “A model,” she added, “would cost you seven francs per sitting. We aren’t wealthy, so we might as well save the money.”
The question of economy decided him at once.
The issue of finances made him decide immediately.
‘I’m agreeable, and it’s even very good of you to show such courage, for you know that it is not a bit of pastime to sit for me. Never mind, you had better confess to it, you big silly, you are afraid of another woman coming here; you are jealous.’
‘I’m open to it, and it’s really nice of you to show such bravery, because you know it’s not easy to sit for me. Never mind, you should just admit it, you big softie, you’re afraid of another woman coming here; you’re jealous.’
Jealous! Yes, indeed she was jealous, so she suffered agony. But she snapped her fingers at other women; all the models in Paris might have sat to him for what she cared. She had but one rival, that painting, that art which robbed her of him.
Jealous! Yes, she was really jealous, and it hurt her deeply. But she dismissed other women; all the models in Paris could have posed for him for all she cared. She had only one rival, that painting, that art which took him away from her.
Claude, who was delighted, at first made a study, a simple academic study, in the attitude required for his picture. They waited until Jacques had gone to school, and the sitting lasted for hours. During the earlier days Christine suffered a great deal from being obliged to remain in the same position; then she grew used to it, not daring to complain, lest she might vex him, and even restraining her tears when he roughly pushed her about. And he soon acquired the habit of doing so, treating her like a mere model; more exacting with her, however, than if he had paid her, never afraid of unduly taxing her strength, since she was his wife. He employed her for every purpose, at every minute, for an arm, a foot, the most trifling detail that he stood in need of. And thus in a way he lowered her to the level of a ‘living lay figure,’ which he stuck in front of him and copied as he might have copied a pitcher or a stew-pan for a bit of still life.
Claude, who was thrilled, initially did a study, a straightforward academic one, focusing on the pose he needed for his painting. They waited until Jacques left for school, and the session stretched on for hours. In the beginning, Christine suffered a lot from having to stay in the same position; eventually, she got used to it, not daring to complain for fear of upsetting him, even holding back her tears when he brusquely moved her around. He quickly developed the habit of doing this, treating her like just a model; however, he was more demanding with her than if he were paying her, never worried about overburdening her since she was his wife. He used her for everything, every minute, for an arm, a foot, or any tiny detail he needed. In this way, he somewhat reduced her to the status of a ‘living lay figure,’ which he placed in front of him and copied as he might have done with a pitcher or a frying pan for a still life.
This time Claude proceeded leisurely, and before roughing in the large figure he tired Christine for months by making her pose in twenty different ways. At last, one day, he began the roughing in. It was an autumnal morning, the north wind was already sharp, and it was by no means warm even in the big studio, although the stove was roaring. As little Jacques was poorly again and unable to go to school, they had decided to lock him up in the room at the back, telling him to be very good. And then the mother settled herself near the stove, motionless, in the attitude required.
This time, Claude took his time, and before starting on the large figure, he had Christine pose in twenty different ways for months. Finally, one day, he began the rough sketching. It was a fall morning, the north wind was already chilly, and it wasn’t warm at all in the big studio, even with the stove blazing. Since little Jacques was sick again and couldn’t go to school, they decided to keep him locked in the room at the back, telling him to behave. Then, the mother positioned herself near the stove, completely still, in the required pose.
During the first hour, the painter, perched upon his steps, kept glancing at her, but did not speak a word. Unutterable sadness stole over her, and she felt afraid of fainting, no longer knowing whether she was suffering from the cold or from a despair that had come from afar, and the bitterness of which she felt to be rising within her. Her fatigue became so great that she staggered and hobbled about on her numbed legs.
During the first hour, the painter, sitting on his ladder, kept looking at her but didn’t say a word. An indescribable sadness washed over her, and she was scared she might faint, unsure if she was feeling cold or if an old despair was creeping back in, its bitterness swelling inside her. She became so exhausted that she stumbled and limped on her frozen legs.
‘What, already?’ cried Claude. ‘Why, you haven’t been at it more than a quarter of an hour. You don’t want to earn your seven francs, then?’
‘What, already?’ exclaimed Claude. ‘Come on, you’ve only been at it for about fifteen minutes. Don’t you want to earn your seven francs, then?’
He was joking in a gruff voice, delighted with his work. And she had scarcely recovered the use of her limbs, beneath the dressing-gown she had wrapped round her, when he went on shouting: ‘Come on, come on, no idling! It’s a grand day to-day is! I must either show some genius or else kick the bucket.’
He was joking in a rough voice, pleased with what he was doing. And she had barely regained the use of her limbs under the dressing gown she had wrapped around herself when he continued shouting: ‘Come on, come on, no slacking! It's a great day today! I have to either show some brilliance or just kick the bucket.’
Then, in a weary way, she at last resumed the pose.
Then, feeling tired, she finally returned to the pose.
The misfortune was that before long, both by his glances and the language he used, she fully realised that she herself was as nothing to him. If ever he praised a limb, a tint, a contour, it was solely from the artistic point of view. Great enthusiasm and passion he often showed, but it was not passion for herself as in the old days. She felt confused and deeply mortified. Ah! this was the end; in her he no longer loved aught but his art, the example of nature and life! And then, with her eyes gazing into space, she would remain rigid, like a statue, keeping back the tears which made her heart swell, lacking even the wretched consolation of being able to cry. And day by day the same sorry life began afresh for her. To stand there as his model had become her profession. She could not refuse, however bitter her grief. Their once happy life was all over, there now seemed to be three people in the place; it was as if Claude had introduced a mistress into it—that woman he was painting. The huge picture rose up between them, parted them as with a wall, beyond which he lived with the other. That duplication of herself well nigh drove Christine mad with jealousy, and yet she was conscious of the pettiness of her sufferings, and did not dare to confess them lest he should laugh at her. However, she did not deceive herself; she fully realised that he preferred her counterfeit to herself, that her image was the worshipped one, the sole thought, the affection of his every hour. He almost killed her with long sittings in that cold draughty studio, in order to enhance the beauty of the other; upon whom depended all his joys and sorrows according as to whether he beheld her live or languish beneath his brush. Was not this love? And what suffering to have to lend herself so that the other might be created, so that she might be haunted by a nightmare of that rival, so that the latter might for ever rise between them, more powerful than reality! To think of it! So much dust, the veriest trifle, a patch of colour on a canvas, a mere semblance destroying all their happiness!—he, silent, indifferent, brutal at times, and she, tortured by his desertion, in despair at being unable to drive away that creature who ever encroached more and more upon their daily life!
The unfortunate thing was that before long, through his glances and the words he chose, she fully realized that she meant nothing to him. Whenever he complimented a body part, a color, or a shape, it was only from an artistic perspective. He often displayed great enthusiasm and passion, but it wasn't passion for her like in the past. She felt confused and deeply hurt. Ah! this was the end; in her, he no longer loved anything but his art, the example of nature, and life! Then, with her eyes staring into the distance, she would stand still like a statue, holding back tears that made her heart ache, lacking even the miserable consolation of being able to cry. And day by day, the same sad life began again for her. Standing there as his model had become her job. She couldn't refuse, no matter how bitter her sorrow. Their once happy life was over; it felt like there were three people in the space—like Claude had introduced a mistress into their lives—this woman he was painting. The massive painting rose between them, separating them like a wall, beyond which he lived with the other. That duplication of herself nearly drove Christine mad with jealousy, yet she was aware of how petty her suffering was and didn’t dare admit it for fear he would laugh at her. However, she didn’t fool herself; she fully understood that he preferred his representation of her to her actual self, that her image was the one he worshipped, the sole thought, the affection of every hour. He nearly exhausted her with long sittings in that cold, drafty studio, just to enhance the beauty of the other, upon whom all his joys and sorrows depended, based on whether he saw her vibrant or fading beneath his brush. Wasn’t this love? And what suffering it was to have to allow herself to be used so that the other could be created, so that she could be haunted by a nightmare of that rival, who forever stood between them, more powerful than reality! Just think about it! So much dust, just a trivial patch of color on a canvas, a mere likeness ruining all their happiness!—he, silent, indifferent, sometimes brutal, and she, tormented by his abandonment, in despair at being unable to drive away that entity that kept encroaching more and more upon their daily lives!
And it was then that Christine, finding herself altogether beaten in her efforts to regain Claude’s love, felt all the sovereignty of art weigh down upon her. That painting, which she had already accepted without restriction, she raised still higher in her estimation, placed inside an awesome tabernacle before which she remained overcome, as before those powerful divinities of wrath which one honours from the very hatred and fear that they inspire. Hers was a holy awe, a conviction that struggling was henceforth useless, that she would be crushed like a bit of straw if she persisted in her obstinacy. Each of her husband’s canvases became magnified in her eyes, the smallest assumed triumphal dimensions, even the worst painted of them overwhelmed her with victory, and she no longer judged them, but grovelled, trembling, thinking them all formidable, and invariably replying to Claude’s questions:
And it was then that Christine, feeling completely defeated in her attempts to win back Claude’s love, felt the weight of art pressing down on her. That painting, which she had already accepted without reservation, she raised even higher in her estimation, placing it inside an impressive shrine before which she stood in awe, just like before those powerful deities of wrath that one honors out of the hatred and fear they inspire. Hers was a reverent fear, a realization that fighting back was now pointless, that she would be crushed like a piece of straw if she continued her stubbornness. Each of her husband’s paintings appeared larger in her eyes, the smallest ones took on grand proportions, even the poorly painted ones filled her with a sense of defeat, and she no longer judged them, but instead cowered, trembling, considering them all intimidating, and always responding to Claude’s questions:
‘Oh, yes; very good! Oh, superb! Oh, very, very extraordinary that one!’
‘Oh, yes; very good! Oh, awesome! Oh, really, really amazing that one!’
Nevertheless, she harboured no anger against him; she still worshipped him with tearful tenderness, as she saw him thus consume himself with efforts. After a few weeks of successful work, everything got spoilt again; he could not finish his large female figure. At times he almost killed his model with fatigue, keeping hard at work for days and days together, then leaving the picture untouched for a whole month. The figure was begun anew, relinquished, painted all over again at least a dozen times. One year, two years went by without the picture reaching completion. Though sometimes it was almost finished, it was scratched out the next morning and painted entirely over again.
Nevertheless, she felt no anger toward him; she still adored him with tearful affection as she watched him struggle so hard. After a few weeks of progress, everything fell apart again; he just couldn't finish his large female figure. Sometimes he almost exhausted his model with fatigue, working tirelessly for days on end, then leaving the painting untouched for a whole month. The figure was restarted, abandoned, and repainted at least a dozen times. One year, two years passed without the painting being completed. Even when it seemed almost done, it was wiped out the next morning and repainted entirely.
Ah! what an effort of creation it was, an effort of blood and tears, filling Claude with agony in his attempt to beget flesh and instil life! Ever battling with reality, and ever beaten, it was a struggle with the Angel. He was wearing himself out with this impossible task of making a canvas hold all nature; he became exhausted at last with the pains which racked his muscles without ever being able to bring his genius to fruition. What others were satisfied with, a more or less faithful rendering, the various necessary bits of trickery, filled him with remorse, made him as indignant as if in resorting to such practices one were guilty of ignoble cowardice; and thus he began his work over and over again, spoiling what was good through his craving to do better. He would always be dissatisfied with his women—so his friends jokingly declared—until they flung their arms round his neck. What was lacking in his power that he could not endow them with life? Very little, no doubt. Sometimes he went beyond the right point, sometimes he stopped short of it. One day the words, ‘an incomplete genius,’ which he overheard, both flattered and frightened him. Yes, it must be that; he jumped too far or not far enough; he suffered from a want of nervous balance; he was afflicted with some hereditary derangement which, because there were a few grains the more or the less of some substance in his brain, was making him a lunatic instead of a great man. Whenever a fit of despair drove him from his studio, whenever he fled from his work, he now carried about with him that idea of fatal impotence, and he heard it beating against his skull like the obstinate tolling of a funeral bell.
Ah! What a struggle it was to create, a struggle filled with blood and tears, driving Claude into agony as he tried to bring flesh to life! Always battling reality and always feeling defeated, it felt like a fight against the Angel. He was wearing himself out trying to make a canvas capture all of nature; he eventually collapsed from the pain that tortured his muscles without ever allowing his genius to flourish. What others settled for—a somewhat faithful representation and necessary tricks—filled him with guilt, making him as angry as if resorting to such methods was a shameful cowardice. Thus, he kept starting his work over and over again, ruining what was good in his quest to do better. He would always feel dissatisfied with his women—so his friends joked—until they threw their arms around him. What did he lack that prevented him from bringing them to life? Probably very little. Sometimes he went too far, sometimes he didn’t go far enough. One day, he overheard someone say, "an incomplete genius," and it both flattered and terrified him. Yes, it had to be that; he either leaped too far or didn’t leap far enough; he lacked some nervous balance; he suffered from a hereditary issue that, with just a slight excess or deficiency of some substance in his brain, was turning him into a madman instead of a great artist. Whenever despair drove him from his studio, whenever he ran away from his work, he carried that feeling of fatal impotence with him, and it echoed in his head like the relentless sound of a funeral bell.
His life became wretched. Never had doubt of himself pursued him in that way before. He disappeared for whole days together; he even stopped out a whole night, coming back the next morning stupefied, without being able to say where he had gone. It was thought that he had been tramping through the outskirts of Paris rather than find himself face to face with his spoilt work. His sole relief was to flee the moment that work filled him with shame and hatred, and to remain away until he felt sufficient courage to face it once more. And not even his wife dared to question him on his return—indeed, she was only too happy to see him back again after her anxious waiting. At such times he madly scoured Paris, especially the outlying quarters, from a longing to debase himself and hob-nob with labourers. He expressed at each recurring crisis his old regret at not being some mason’s hodman. Did not happiness consist in having solid limbs, and in performing the work one was built for well and quickly? He had wrecked his life; he ought to have got himself engaged in the building line in the old times when he had lunched at the ‘Dog of Montargis,’ Gomard’s tavern, where he had known a Limousin, a big, strapping, merry fellow, whose brawny arms he envied. Then, on coming back to the Rue Tourlaque, with his legs faint and his head empty, he gave his picture much the same distressful, frightened glance as one casts at a corpse in a mortuary, until fresh hope of resuscitating it, of endowing it with life, brought a flush to his face once more.
His life became miserable. He had never felt such self-doubt before. He disappeared for whole days at a time; he even stayed out all night, coming back the next morning dazed, unable to say where he had gone. People thought he had been wandering around the outskirts of Paris rather than confront his ruined work. The only way he could cope was to run away whenever that work filled him with shame and hatred, staying away until he felt brave enough to face it again. Even his wife didn’t dare to ask him about his absences—she was just relieved to see him return after her anxious waiting. During those times, he would frantically roam Paris, especially the outskirts, driven by a longing to humble himself and mix with the laborers. He often voiced his old regret at not being a bricklayer's assistant. Didn’t happiness come from having strong limbs and doing the work one was made for efficiently? He had ruined his life; he should have gotten into construction back in the days when he used to lunch at the 'Dog of Montargis,' Gomard’s tavern, where he had known a big, cheerful Limousin whose muscular arms he envied. Then, returning to Rue Tourlaque, his legs weary and his mind blank, he cast a distressed, fearful glance at his painting, much like one would look at a corpse in a morgue, until a fresh hope of bringing it back to life sparked a flush in his cheeks once more.
One day Christine was posing, and the figure of the woman was again well nigh finished. For the last hour, however, Claude had been growing gloomy, losing the childish delight that he had displayed at the beginning of the sitting. So his wife scarcely dared to breathe, feeling by her own discomfort that everything must be going wrong once more, and afraid that she might accelerate the catastrophe if she moved as much as a finger. And, surely enough, he suddenly gave a cry of anguish, and launched forth an oath in a thunderous voice.
One day, Christine was posing, and the figure of the woman was almost finished. But for the last hour, Claude had been getting more and more gloomy, losing the childlike joy he had shown at the start of the session. His wife barely dared to breathe, sensing from her own discomfort that everything must be going wrong again, and worried that she might make things worse if she moved even a little. Sure enough, he suddenly cried out in distress and shouted an oath in a booming voice.
‘Oh, curse it! curse it!’
"Ugh, damn it! Damn it!"
He had flung his handful of brushes from the top of the steps. Then, blinded with rage, with one blow of his fist he transpierced the canvas.
He had thrown his handful of brushes from the top of the steps. Then, blinded by rage, he punched through the canvas with one blow of his fist.
Christine held out her trembling hands.
Christine held out her shaking hands.
‘My dear, my dear!’
"My love, my love!"
But when she had flung a dressing-gown over her shoulders, and approached the picture, she experienced keen delight, a burst of satisfied hatred. Claude’s fist had struck ‘the other one’ full in the bosom, and there was a gaping hole! At last, then, that other one was killed!
But when she threw a dressing gown over her shoulders and walked up to the picture, she felt a sharp thrill, a rush of satisfied hatred. Claude's fist had hit 'the other one' right in the chest, and there was a huge hole! Finally, that other one was dead!
Motionless, horror-struck by that murder, Claude stared at the perforated bosom. Poignant grief came upon him at the sight of the wound whence the blood of his work seemed to flow. Was it possible? Was it he who had thus murdered what he loved best of all on earth? His anger changed into stupor; his fingers wandered over the canvas, drawing the ragged edges of the rent together, as if he had wished to close the bleeding gash. He was choking; he stammered, distracted with boundless grief:
Motionless, horrified by the murder, Claude stared at the punctured chest. A deep sadness washed over him at the sight of the wound from which the life of his work seemed to bleed. Could it be? Had he really destroyed what he loved most in the world? His anger turned to shock; his fingers grazed the canvas, trying to pull the torn edges together, as if he wanted to seal the gaping wound. He was struggling to breathe; he stammered, overwhelmed by limitless grief:
‘She is killed, she is killed!’
"She’s gone, she’s gone!"
Then Christine, in her maternal love for that big child of an artist, felt moved to her very entrails. She forgave him as usual. She saw well enough that he now had but one thought—to mend the rent, to repair the evil at once; and she helped him; it was she who held the shreds together, whilst he from behind glued a strip of canvas against them. When she dressed herself, ‘the other one’ was there again, immortal, simply retaining near her heart a slight scar, which seemed to make her doubly dear to the painter.
Then Christine, filled with maternal love for that big child of an artist, felt deeply moved. She forgave him, as she always did. She could see that he had only one thought in mind—to fix the damage, to repair the mistake right away; and she helped him; it was she who held the pieces together while he glued a strip of canvas on from behind. When she got dressed, ‘the other one’ was there again, immortal, simply carrying a small scar near her heart, which seemed to make her even more special to the painter.
As this unhinging of Claude’s faculties increased, he drifted into a sort of superstition, into a devout belief in certain processes and methods. He banished oil from his colours, and spoke of it as of a personal enemy. On the other hand, he held that turpentine produced a solid unpolished surface, and he had some secrets of his own which he hid from everybody; solutions of amber, liquefied copal, and other resinous compounds that made colours dry quickly, and prevented them from cracking. But he experienced some terrible worries, as the absorbent nature of the canvas at once sucked in the little oil contained in the paint. Then the question of brushes had always worried him greatly; he insisted on having them with special handles; and objecting to sable, he used nothing but oven-dried badger hair. More important, however, than everything else was the question of palette-knives, which, like Courbet, he used for his backgrounds. He had quite a collection of them, some long and flexible, others broad and squat, and one which was triangular like a glazier’s, and which had been expressly made for him. It was the real Delacroix knife. Besides, he never made use of the scraper or razor, which he considered beneath an artist’s dignity. But, on the other hand, he indulged in all sorts of mysterious practices in applying his colours, concocted recipes and changed them every month, and suddenly fancied that he had bit on the right system of painting, when, after repudiating oil and its flow, he began to lay on successive touches until he arrived at the exact tone he required. One of his fads for a long while was to paint from right to left; for, without confessing as much, he felt sure that it brought him luck. But the terrible affair which unhinged him once more was an all-invading theory respecting the complementary colours. Gagnière had been the first to speak to him on the subject, being himself equally inclined to technical speculation. After which Claude, impelled by the exuberance of his passion, took to exaggerating the scientific principles whereby, from the three primitive colours, yellow, red, and blue, one derives the three secondary ones, orange, green, and violet, and, further, a whole series of complementary and similar hues, whose composites are obtained mathematically from one another. Thus science entered into painting, there was a method for logical observation already. One only had to take the predominating hue of a picture, and note the complementary or similar colours, to establish experimentally what variations would occur; for instance, red would turn yellowish if it were near blue, and a whole landscape would change in tint by the refractions and the very decomposition of light, according to the clouds passing over it. Claude then accurately came to this conclusion: That objects have no real fixed colour; that they assume various hues according to ambient circumstances; but the misfortune was that when he took to direct observation, with his brain throbbing with scientific formulas, his prejudiced vision lent too much force to delicate shades, and made him render what was theoretically correct in too vivid a manner: thus his style, once so bright, so full of the palpitation of sunlight, ended in a reversal of everything to which the eye was accustomed, giving, for instance, flesh of a violet tinge under tricoloured skies. Insanity seemed to be at the end of it all.
As Claude’s mental breakdown worsened, he fell into a kind of superstition, developing a strong belief in certain techniques and methods. He removed oil from his paints and treated it like a personal enemy. Conversely, he believed that turpentine created a solid, unrefined surface, and he kept some secrets to himself—solutions of amber, liquefied copal, and other resin compounds that made paints dry quickly and prevented cracking. However, he faced significant troubles because the absorbent nature of the canvas quickly absorbed the little oil in the paint. The choice of brushes always troubled him; he insisted on having them with special handles and, avoiding sable, he used only oven-dried badger hair. More importantly than anything else was his need for palette knives, which, like Courbet, he used for his backgrounds. He had quite a collection of them, some long and flexible, others wide and short, and one that was triangular, made just for him, known as the real Delacroix knife. Additionally, he never used a scraper or razor, believing it was beneath an artist’s dignity. Instead, he engaged in all sorts of mysterious techniques for applying his colors, concocted new recipes regularly, and suddenly believed he had found the perfect painting method. After abandoning oil and its flow, he began layering touches until he achieved the precise tone he wanted. For a long time, one of his quirks was to paint from right to left; without admitting it, he felt it brought him luck. But the stressful situation that drove him insane again was an all-consuming theory about complementary colors. Gagnière had introduced him to the idea, as he too was drawn to technical speculation. Following that, Claude, driven by his intense passion, started to exaggerate the scientific principles explaining how the three primary colors—yellow, red, and blue—give rise to the three secondary ones: orange, green, and violet, plus many complementary hues, which can be mathematically derived from one another. Thus, science became part of painting, and a method for logical observation materialized. You could simply take the dominant color of a painting and identify complementary or similar colors to experimentally determine how variations would occur; for instance, red would appear yellowish near blue, and an entire landscape’s tint would shift based on the refractions of light and the clouds above it. Claude then accurately concluded that objects have no true fixed color; they take on different hues depending on surrounding conditions. The problem arose when he attempted direct observation, his mind buzzing with scientific formulas, and his biased vision emphasized subtle shades too strongly, causing him to render what was theoretically accurate in an overly vivid way. Thus, his style, once bright and full of sunlight’s pulsation, flipped everything the eye was used to seeing, resulting in flesh tones appearing violet under multicolored skies. It felt like insanity was looming at the end of it all.
Poverty finished off Claude. It had gradually increased, while the family spent money without counting; and, when the last copper of the twenty thousand francs had gone, it swooped down upon them—horrible and irreparable. Christine, who wanted to look for work, was incapable of doing anything, even ordinary needlework. She bewailed her lot, twirling her fingers and inveighing against the idiotic young lady’s education that she had received, since it had given her no profession, and her only resource would be to enter into domestic service, should life still go against them. Claude, on his side, had become a subject of chaff with the Parisians, and no longer sold a picture. An independent exhibition at which he and some friends had shown some pictures, had finished him off as regards amateurs—so merry had the public become at the sight of his canvases, streaked with all the colours of the rainbow. The dealers fled from him. M. Hue alone now and then made a pilgrimage to the Rue Tourlaque, and remained in ecstasy before the exaggerated bits, those which blazed in unexpected pyrotechnical fashion, in despair at being unable to cover them with gold. And though the painter wanted to make him a present of them, implored him to accept them, the old fellow displayed extraordinary delicacy of feeling. He pinched himself to amass a small sum of money from time to time, and then religiously took away the seemingly delirious picture, to hang it beside his masterpieces. Such windfalls came too seldom, and Claude was obliged to descend to ‘trade art,’ repugnant as it was to him. Such, indeed, was his despair at having fallen into that poison house, where he had sworn never to set foot, that he would have preferred starving to death, but for the two poor beings who were dependent on him and who suffered like himself. He became familiar with ‘viae dolorosae’ painted at reduced prices, with male and female saints at so much per gross, even with ‘pounced’ shop blinds—in short, all the ignoble jobs that degrade painting and make it so much idiotic delineation, lacking even the charm of naivete. He even suffered the humiliation of having portraits at five-and-twenty francs a-piece refused, because he failed to produce a likeness; and he reached the lowest degree of distress—he worked according to size for the petty dealers who sell daubs on the bridges, and export them to semi-civilised countries. They bought his pictures at two and three francs a-piece, according to the regulation dimensions. This was like physical decay, it made him waste away; he rose from such tasks feeling ill, incapable of serious work, looking at his large picture in distress, and leaving it sometimes untouched for a week, as if he had felt his hands befouled and unworthy of working at it.
Poverty took Claude down. It gradually piled up while the family spent money without a care, and when the last coin of the twenty thousand francs was gone, it hit them hard—terrible and irreversible. Christine, who wanted to find a job, couldn’t do anything, not even simple sewing. She lamented her situation, twisting her fingers and railing against the pointless education she had received, which left her with no career path, her only option being to take a job in domestic service if life kept getting worse. Claude, on his end, became the target of ridicule among Parisians and stopped selling paintings. An independent exhibition where he and some friends showcased their artwork ended any chance he had with collectors—the public found so much humor in his canvases, dappled with all the colors of the rainbow. The art dealers avoided him. Only M. Hue occasionally visited the Rue Tourlaque and marveled at the exaggerated pieces that blazed like fireworks, despairing at his inability to buy them. Even though the painter wanted to gift them to him and begged him to accept them, the old man showed remarkable sensitivity. He pinched himself to save a little money here and there and then dutifully took home a seemingly wild painting to hang alongside his masterpieces. Such fortunate events were rare, and Claude had to turn to ‘trade art,’ which disgusted him. Truly, his despair at falling into that trap—where he vowed he’d never go—was so great that he would have preferred starving to death if it weren’t for the two unfortunate souls depending on him who were suffering just like he was. He became familiar with ‘viae dolorosae’ painted at cut rates, with male and female saints sold by the dozen, and even with ‘pounced’ shop signs—in short, all the degrading work that sullied painting and turned it into mindless representations, lacking even the charm of naivety. He even endured the embarrassment of having portraits at twenty-five francs each rejected because they didn’t resemble the subjects, and he reached the lowest point of desperation—he worked by size for the petty dealers selling trash on the bridges, exporting them to semi-civilized countries. They bought his paintings for two or three francs each, depending on the standard sizes. This felt like a form of physical decay, making him wither away; he finished such tasks feeling sick, incapable of serious work, glancing at his large painting in despair, sometimes leaving it untouched for a week, as if he felt his hands were tainted and unworthy of working on it.
They scarcely had bread to eat, and the huge shanty, which Christine had shown herself so proud of, on settling in it, became uninhabitable in the winter. She, once such an active housewife, now dragged herself about the place, without courage even to sweep the floor, and thus everything lapsed into abandonment. In the disaster little Jacques was sadly weakened by unwholesome and insufficient food, for their meals often consisted of a mere crust, eaten standing. With their lives thus ill-regulated, uncared for, they were drifting to the filth of the poor who lose even all self-pride.
They hardly had any bread to eat, and the big shack that Christine had once been so proud of became unlivable during the winter. She, who used to be such an active housewife, now dragged herself around the place, lacking the energy even to sweep the floor, and everything fell into neglect. Little Jacques was sadly weakened by unhealthy and insufficient food, as their meals often consisted of just a crust of bread, eaten while standing. With their lives so disorganized and uncared for, they were sliding into the squalor of the poor who lose all sense of pride.
At the close of another year, Claude, on one of those days of defeat, when he fled from his miscarried picture, met an old acquaintance. This time he had sworn he would never go home again, and he had been tramping across Paris since noon, as if at his heels he had heard the wan spectre of the big, nude figure of his picture—ravaged by constant retouching, and always left incomplete—pursuing him with a passionate craving for birth. The mist was melting into a yellowish drizzle, befouling the muddy streets. It was about five o’clock, and he was crossing the Rue Royale like one walking in his sleep, at the risk of being run over, his clothes in rags and mud-bespattered up to his neck, when a brougham suddenly drew up.
At the end of another year, Claude, on one of those days of failure when he had abandoned his flawed painting, ran into an old acquaintance. This time he had vowed never to go home again, and he had been wandering through Paris since noon, as if the haunting image of the unfinished, damaged figure of his painting—constantly retouched but never completed—was chasing him down with an intense desire to be realized. The mist was turning into a yellowish drizzle, dirtying the muddy streets. It was around five o'clock, and he was crossing the Rue Royale as if in a daze, oblivious to the danger of being hit by a car. His clothes were in tatters, splattered with mud up to his neck, when a carriage suddenly pulled up.
‘Claude, eh? Claude!—is that how you pass your friends?’
‘Claude, huh? Claude!—is that how you treat your friends?’
It was Irma Bécot who spoke, Irma in a charming grey silk dress, covered with Chantilly lace. She had hastily let down the window, and she sat smiling, beaming in the frame-work of the carriage door.
It was Irma Bécot who spoke, Irma in a lovely grey silk dress, adorned with Chantilly lace. She had quickly lowered the window, and she sat smiling, glowing in the frame of the carriage door.
‘Where are you going?’
"Where are you headed?"
He, staring at her open-mouthed, replied that he was going nowhere. At which she merrily expressed surprise in a loud voice, looking at him with her saucy eyes.
He stared at her with his mouth open and said that he wasn’t going anywhere. She then cheerfully exclaimed in a loud voice, looking at him with her mischievous eyes.
‘Get in, then; it’s such a long while since we met,’ said she. ‘Get in, or you’ll be knocked down.’
“Get in, then; it’s been so long since we saw each other,” she said. “Get in, or you’ll get hit.”
And, in fact, the other drivers were getting impatient, and urging their horses on, amidst a terrible din, so he did as he was bidden, feeling quite dazed; and she drove him away, dripping, with the unmistakable signs of his poverty upon him, in the brougham lined with blue satin, where he sat partly on the lace of her skirt, while the cabdrivers jeered at the elopement before falling into line again.
And in fact, the other drivers were getting impatient, urging their horses on amidst a terrible noise, so he did as he was told, feeling totally bewildered; and she drove him away, soaked, with clear signs of his poverty on him, in the brougham lined with blue satin, where he sat partly on the lace of her skirt, while the cabdrivers mocked the elopement before getting back in line.
When Claude came back to the Rue Tourlaque he was in a dazed condition, and for a couple of days remained musing whether after all he might not have taken the wrong course in life. He seemed so strange that Christine questioned him, whereupon he at first stuttered and stammered, and finally confessed everything. There was a scene; she wept for a long while, then pardoned him once more, full of infinite indulgence for him. And, indeed, amidst all her bitter grief there sprang up a hope that he might yet return to her, for if he could deceive her thus he could not care as much as she had imagined for that hateful painted creature who stared down from the big canvas.
When Claude returned to Rue Tourlaque, he was in a fog, and for a couple of days, he wondered if he had made the wrong choices in life. He seemed so off that Christine asked him about it, and at first, he stammered before finally admitting everything. There was a dramatic moment; she cried for a long time, then forgave him again, showing him endless compassion. And amidst all her deep sadness, she felt a flicker of hope that he might come back to her, because if he could deceive her like that, he couldn't care as much for that awful painted figure staring down from the big canvas as she had thought.
The days went by, and towards the middle of the winter Claude’s courage revived once more. One day, while putting some old frames in order, he came upon a roll of canvas which had fallen behind the other pictures. On opening the roll he found on it the nude figure, the reclining woman of his old painting, ‘In the Open Air,’ which he had cut out when the picture had come back to him from the Salon of the Rejected. And, as he gazed at it, he uttered a cry of admiration:
The days passed, and by the middle of winter, Claude's confidence came back. One day, while organizing some old frames, he found a roll of canvas that had fallen behind the other paintings. When he unrolled it, he discovered the nude figure, the reclining woman from his old painting, ‘In the Open Air,’ which he had cut out when the artwork was returned to him from the Salon of the Rejected. As he looked at it, he let out a cry of admiration:
‘By the gods, how beautiful it is!’
‘By the gods, how beautiful it is!’
He at once secured it to the wall with four nails, and remained for hours in contemplation before it. His hands shook, the blood rushed to his face. Was it possible that he had painted such a masterly thing? He had possessed genius in those days then. So his skull, his eyes, his fingers had been changed. He became so feverishly excited and felt such a need of unburthening himself to somebody, that at last he called his wife.
He immediately nailed it to the wall with four nails and spent hours staring at it. His hands trembled, and blood rushed to his face. Could it be that he had created something so amazing? He must have had real talent back then. His mind, his eyes, his hands had all changed. He became so intensely excited and felt a strong urge to share his feelings with someone that he finally called for his wife.
‘Just come and have a look. Isn’t her attitude good, eh? How delicately her muscles are articulated! Just look at that bit there, full of sunlight. And at the shoulder here. Ah, heavens! it’s full of life; I can feel it throb as I touch it.’
‘Just come and take a look. Isn’t her attitude great, huh? Look at how well-defined her muscles are! Check out that spot there, soaked in sunlight. And at this shoulder. Wow! It’s full of life; I can feel it pulsating as I touch it.’
Christine, standing by, kept looking and answering in monosyllables. This resurrection of herself, after so many years, had at first flattered and surprised her. But on seeing him become so excited, she gradually felt uncomfortable and irritated, without knowing why.
Christine, standing nearby, kept looking and responding with one-word answers. This revival of herself, after so many years, initially flattered and surprised her. But as she saw him getting so excited, she slowly began to feel uneasy and annoyed, without really understanding why.
‘Tell me,’ he continued, ‘don’t you think her beautiful enough for one to go on one’s knees to her?’
‘Tell me,’ he continued, ‘don’t you think she’s beautiful enough for someone to get down on their knees for her?’
‘Yes, yes. But she has become rather blackish—’
‘Yes, yes. But she has gotten kind of dark—’
Claude protested vehemently. Become blackish, what an idea! That woman would never grow black; she possessed immortal youth! Veritable passion had seized hold of him; he spoke of the figure as of a living being; he had sudden longings to look at her that made him leave everything else, as if he were hurrying to an appointment.
Claude protested strongly. Turn blackish, what a ridiculous thought! That woman would never turn black; she had eternal youth! He was truly passionate; he talked about her figure as if it were a living being; he felt sudden urges to look at her that made him drop everything else, as if he were rushing to a meeting.
Then, one morning, he was taken with a fit of work.
Then, one morning, he felt a sudden urge to get to work.
‘But, confound it all, as I did that, I can surely do it again,’ he said. ‘Ah, this time, unless I’m a downright brute, we’ll see about it.’
‘But, damn it all, as I did that, I can totally do it again,’ he said. ‘Ah, this time, unless I’m a complete jerk, we’ll see what happens.’
And Christine had to give him a sitting there and then. For eight hours a day, indeed, during a whole month he kept her before him, without compassion for her increasing exhaustion or for the fatigue he felt himself. He obstinately insisted upon producing a masterpiece; he was determined that the upright figure of his big picture should equal that reclining one which he saw on the wall, beaming with life. He constantly referred to it, compared it with the one he was painting, distracted by the fear of being unable to equal it. He cast one glance at it, another at Christine, and a third at his canvas, and burst into oaths whenever he felt dissatisfied. He ended by abusing his wife.
And Christine had to sit for him then and there. For eight hours a day, in fact, for a whole month, he kept her in front of him, without any concern for her growing exhaustion or for the fatigue he felt himself. He stubbornly insisted on creating a masterpiece; he was determined that the upright figure in his big painting should match that reclining one he saw on the wall, radiating life. He continuously referred to it, compared it with what he was painting, distracted by the fear of being unable to measure up. He glanced at it, then at Christine, and then at his canvas, swearing whenever he felt unsatisfied. Eventually, he ended up taking out his frustration on his wife.
She was no longer young. Age had spoilt her figure, and that it was which spoilt his work. She listened, and staggered in her very grief. Those sittings, from which she had already suffered so much, were becoming unbearable torture now. What was this new freak of crushing her with her own girlhood, of fanning her jealousy by filling her with regret for vanished beauty? She was becoming her own rival, she could no longer look at that old picture of herself without being stung at the heart by hateful envy. Ah, how heavily had that picture, that study she had sat for long ago, weighed upon her existence! The whole of her misfortunes sprang from it. It had changed the current of her existence. And it had come to life again, it rose from the dead, endowed with greater vitality than herself, to finish killing her, for there was no longer aught but one woman for Claude—she who was shown reclining on the old canvas, and who now arose and became the upright figure of his new picture.
She was no longer young. Age had ruined her figure, and that was what ruined his artwork. She listened, and wavered under her grief. Those sessions, which had already caused her so much pain, were turning into unbearable torture now. What was this new twist of crushing her with her own youth, fueling her jealousy by filling her with regret for lost beauty? She was becoming her own competitor; she could no longer look at that old portrait of herself without feeling a painful sting of envy. Ah, how heavily that painting, that study she had posed for long ago, weighed on her life! All of her misfortunes stemmed from it. It had altered the course of her life. And it had come back to life again; it rose from the dead, filled with more vitality than she had, to finish destroying her, for there was now only one woman for Claude—she who was depicted reclining on the old canvas, and who now emerged as the upright figure in his new painting.
Then Christine felt herself growing older and older at each successive sitting. And she experienced the infinite despair which comes upon passionate women when love, like beauty, abandons them. Was it because of this that Claude no longer cared for her, that he sought refuge in an unnatural passion for his work? She soon lost all clear perception of things; she fell into a state of utter neglect, going about in a dressing jacket and dirty petticoats, devoid of all coquettish feeling, discouraged by the idea that it was useless for her to continue struggling, since she had become old.
Then Christine felt herself aging more and more with each passing day. She experienced the deep despair that passionate women feel when love, just like beauty, leaves them. Was this why Claude no longer cared for her, why he took refuge in an unnatural obsession with his work? She quickly lost all clarity about her situation; she fell into complete neglect, wandering around in a robe and dirty skirts, lacking any sense of flirtation, disheartened by the thought that it was pointless for her to keep trying since she had grown old.
There were occasionally abominable scenes between her and Claude, who this time, however, obstinately stuck to his work and finished his picture, swearing that, come what might, he would send it to the Salon. He lived on his steps, cleaning up his backgrounds until dark. At last, thoroughly exhausted, he declared that he would touch the canvas no more; and Sandoz, on coming to see him one day, at four o’clock, did not find him at home. Christine declared that he had just gone out to take a breath of air on the height of Montmartre.
There were sometimes terrible scenes between her and Claude, but this time he stubbornly focused on his work and finished his painting, insisting that no matter what, he would send it to the Salon. He stayed in his studio, cleaning up his backgrounds until it got dark. Finally, completely worn out, he said he wouldn’t touch the canvas again; and when Sandoz came to visit him one day at four o’clock, he found that Claude was not home. Christine said he had just stepped out to get some fresh air on the height of Montmartre.
The breach between Claude and his old friends had gradually widened. With time the latters’ visits had become brief and far between, for they felt uncomfortable when they found themselves face to face with that disturbing style of painting; and they were more and more upset by the unhinging of a mind which had been the admiration of their youth. Now all had fled; none excepting Sandoz ever came. Gagnière had even left Paris, to settle down in one of the two houses he owned at Melun, where he lived frugally upon the proceeds of the other one, after suddenly marrying, to every one’s surprise, an old maid, his music mistress, who played Wagner to him of an evening. As for Mahoudeau, he alleged work as an excuse for not coming, and indeed he was beginning to earn some money, thanks to a bronze manufacturer, who employed him to touch up his models. Matters were different with Jory, whom no one saw, since Mathilde despotically kept him sequestrated. She had conquered him, and he had fallen into a kind of domesticity comparable to that of a faithful dog, yielding up the keys of his cashbox, and only carrying enough money about him to buy a cigar at a time. It was even said that Mathilde, like the devotee she had once been, had thrown him into the arms of the Church, in order to consolidate her conquest, and that she was constantly talking to him about death, of which he was horribly afraid. Fagerolles alone affected a lively, cordial feeling towards his old friend Claude whenever he happened to meet him. He then always promised to go and see him, but never did so. He was so busy since his great success, in such request, advertised, celebrated, on the road to every imaginable honour and form of fortune! And Claude regretted nobody save Dubuche, to whom he still felt attached, from a feeling of affection for the old reminiscences of boyhood, notwithstanding the disagreements which difference of disposition had provoked later on. But Dubuche, it appeared, was not very happy either. No doubt he was gorged with millions, but he led a wretched life, constantly at logger-heads with his father-in-law (who complained of having been deceived with regard to his capabilities as an architect), and obliged to pass his life amidst the medicine bottles of his ailing wife and his two children, who, having been prematurely born, had to be reared virtually in cotton wool.
The gap between Claude and his old friends had slowly grown wider. Over time, their visits had become short and infrequent because they felt uncomfortable facing that unsettling style of painting. They were increasingly disturbed by the unraveling of a mind that had once inspired their admiration in youth. Now they had all disappeared; except for Sandoz, no one came around anymore. Gagnière had even left Paris to settle in one of his two houses in Melun, where he lived modestly off the income from the other house after unexpectedly marrying an old maid, his music teacher, who played Wagner for him in the evenings. As for Mahoudeau, he used work as an excuse for not visiting, and indeed he had started to earn some money thanks to a bronze manufacturer who hired him to improve his models. Things were different for Jory, whom nobody saw, since Mathilde kept him locked away. She had dominated him, and he had slipped into a domesticity similar to that of a loyal dog, surrendering the keys to his cashbox and only carrying enough money to buy a single cigar at a time. It was even rumored that Mathilde, like the devotee she used to be, had pushed him toward the Church to solidify her control, and that she constantly talked to him about death, which he feared terribly. Fagerolles alone pretended to be friendly and warm toward his old friend Claude whenever they crossed paths. He always promised to visit, but never followed through. He was too busy after his big success, in high demand, celebrated, on the path to every conceivable honor and fortune! And Claude missed nobody more than Dubuche, to whom he still felt a bond, rooted in fond childhood memories, despite the disagreements that came later. But Dubuche didn’t seem very happy either. He might have been swimming in money, but he lived a miserable life, constantly clashing with his father-in-law (who complained about being misled regarding his architectural skills) and having to navigate life among the medicine bottles of his sick wife and their two children, who, being premature, had to be raised almost like they were fragile.
Of all the old friends, therefore, there only remained Sandoz, who still found his way to the Rue Tourlaque. He came thither for little Jacques, his godson, and for the sorrowing woman also, that Christine whose passionate features amidst all this distress moved him deeply, like a vision of one of the ardently amorous creatures whom he would have liked to embody in his books. But, above all, his feeling of artistic brotherliness had increased since he had seen Claude losing ground, foundering amidst the heroic folly of art. At first he had remained utterly astonished at it, for he had believed in his friend more than in himself. Since their college days, he had always placed himself second, while setting Claude very high on fame’s ladder—on the same rung, indeed, as the masters who revolutionise a period. Then he had been grievously affected by that bankruptcy of genius; he had become full of bitter, heartfelt pity at the sight of the horrible torture of impotency. Did one ever know who was the madman in art? Every failure touched him to the quick, and the more a picture or a book verged upon aberration, sank to the grotesque and lamentable, the more did Sandoz quiver with compassion, the more did he long to lull to sleep, in the soothing extravagance of their dreams, those who were thus blasted by their own work.
Of all the old friends, only Sandoz still made his way to Rue Tourlaque. He came there for little Jacques, his godson, and for the grieving woman, Christine, whose passionate features amid all this pain moved him deeply, like a vision of one of those intensely loving characters he wished he could bring to life in his books. But more than anything, his sense of artistic kinship had grown since he saw Claude struggling and sinking amidst the heroic madness of art. At first, he had been completely shocked by it because he had believed in his friend more than himself. Since their college days, he had always viewed himself as second best, putting Claude up on a high pedestal—right alongside the masters who transform a period. He had been deeply impacted by that collapse of genius; he felt a bitter, heartfelt pity watching the terrible suffering of powerlessness. Who really knows the madman in art? Every failure hit him hard, and the more a painting or a book teetered on the edge of madness, fell into the grotesque and pathetic, the more Sandoz felt a surge of compassion, the more he wanted to soothe those destroyed by their own creations, wrapping them in the comforting madness of their dreams.
On the day when Sandoz called, and failed to find Claude at home, he did not go away; but, seeing Christine’s eyelids red with crying, he said:
On the day Sandoz came by and didn't find Claude at home, he didn’t leave. Instead, noticing that Christine’s eyes were puffy from crying, he said:
‘If you think that he’ll be in soon, I’ll wait for him.’
‘If you think he’ll be here soon, I’ll wait for him.’
‘Oh! he surely won’t be long.’
‘Oh! he definitely won't be long.’
‘In that case I’ll wait, unless I am in your way.’
‘In that case, I’ll wait unless I’m in your way.’
Never had her demeanour, the crushed look of a neglected woman, her listless movements, her slow speech, her indifference for everything but the passion that was consuming her, moved him so deeply. For the last week, perhaps, she had not put a chair in its place, or dusted a piece of furniture; she left the place to go to wreck and ruin, scarcely having the strength to drag herself about. And it was enough to break one’s heart to behold that misery ending in filth beneath the glaring light from the big window; to gaze on that ill-pargetted shanty, so bare and disorderly, where one shivered with melancholy although it was a bright February afternoon.
Never had her demeanor, the defeated look of a neglected woman, her aimless movements, her slow speech, her indifference to everything except the obsession consuming her, affected him so deeply. For the last week, maybe, she hadn’t put a chair back in its place or dusted a piece of furniture; she let the place fall apart, barely having the strength to move around. It was heartbreaking to witness that misery ending in filth under the glaring light from the large window; to look at that poorly constructed shack, so empty and messy, where one felt a chill of sadness even though it was a bright February afternoon.
Christine had slowly sat down beside an iron bedstead, which Sandoz had not noticed when he came in.
Christine had slowly sat down next to an iron bed, which Sandoz hadn’t noticed when he walked in.
‘Hallo,’ he said, ‘is Jacques ill?’
‘Hello,’ he said, ‘is Jacques sick?’
She was covering up the child, who constantly flung off the bedclothes.
She was tucking in the child, who kept kicking off the blankets.
‘Yes, he hasn’t been up these three days. We brought his bed in here so that he might be with us. He was never very strong. But he is getting worse and worse, it’s distracting.’
‘Yes, he hasn’t gotten up these three days. We brought his bed in here so he could be with us. He was never very strong. But he’s getting worse and worse; it’s really distracting.’
She had a fixed stare in her eyes and spoke in a monotonous tone, and Sandoz felt frightened when he drew up to the bedside. The child’s pale head seemed to have grown bigger still, so heavy that he could no longer support it. He lay perfectly still, and one might have thought he was dead, but for the heavy breathing coming from between his discoloured lips.
She had a vacant look in her eyes and spoke in a flat voice, and Sandoz felt scared as he approached the bedside. The child’s pale head seemed even larger, so heavy that he could no longer hold it up. He lay completely still, and one might have thought he was dead, if not for the labored breathing escaping from his discolored lips.
‘My poor little Jacques, it’s I, your godfather. Won’t you say how d’ye do?’
‘My poor little Jacques, it’s me, your godfather. Won’t you say hi?’
The child made a fruitless, painful effort to lift his head; his eyelids parted, showing his white eyeballs, then closed again.
The child struggled painfully to lift his head; his eyelids opened, revealing his white eyeballs, then closed again.
‘Have you sent for a doctor?’
“Have you called a doctor?”
Christine shrugged her shoulders.
Christine shrugged.
‘Oh! doctors, what do they know?’ she answered. ‘We sent for one; he said that there was nothing to be done. Let us hope that it will pass over again. He is close upon twelve years old now, and maybe he is growing too fast.’
‘Oh! What do doctors really know?’ she replied. ‘We called one; he said there was nothing that could be done. Let’s hope it passes soon. He’s almost twelve now, and maybe he’s just growing too quickly.’
Sandoz, quite chilled, said nothing for fear of increasing her anxiety, since she did not seem to realise the gravity of the disease. He walked about in silence and stopped in front of the picture.
Sandoz, feeling quite uneasy, stayed silent to avoid making her more anxious, as she didn't seem to understand how serious the disease was. He paced quietly and paused in front of the painting.
‘Ho, ho! it’s getting on; it’s on the right road this time.’
‘Hey, hey! It’s getting late; we’re on the right track this time.’
‘It’s finished.’
"Done."
‘What! finished?’
"Wait, is it finished?"
And when she told him that the canvas was to be sent to the Salon that next week, he looked embarrassed, and sat down on the couch, like a man who wishes to judge the work leisurely. The background, the quays, the Seine, whence arose the triumphal point of the Cité, still remained in a sketchy state—masterly, however, but as if the painter had been afraid of spoiling the Paris of his dream by giving it greater finish. There was also an excellent group on the left, the lightermen unloading the sacks of plaster being carefully and powerfully treated. But the boat full of women in the centre transpierced the picture, as it were, with a blaze of flesh-tints which were quite out of place; and the brilliancy and hallucinatory proportions of the large nude figure which Claude had painted in a fever seemed strangely, disconcertingly false amidst the reality of all the rest.
And when she told him that the canvas was going to be sent to the Salon next week, he looked embarrassed and sat down on the couch, like someone who wants to evaluate the work at his own pace. The background, the quays, the Seine, from which the triumphal point of the Cité arose, was still in a rough state—masterful, though, as if the painter was afraid of ruining the Paris of his dreams by making it more polished. There was also an excellent group on the left, the lightermen unloading the sacks of plaster, treated with care and strength. But the boat full of women in the center cut through the painting, so to speak, with a burst of skin tones that felt completely out of place; and the vibrancy and surreal proportions of the large nude figure that Claude had painted in a frenzy seemed oddly, unsettlingly off against the reality of everything else.
Sandoz, silent, fell despair steal over him as he sat in front of that magnificent failure. But he saw Christine’s eyes fixed upon him, and had sufficient strength of mind to say:
Sandoz sat in silence, feeling despair wash over him as he stared at that magnificent failure. But he noticed Christine’s eyes focused on him, and found enough strength of mind to say:
‘Astounding!—the woman, astounding!’
"Wow!—the woman, wow!"
At that moment Claude came in, and on seeing his old chum he uttered a joyous exclamation and shook his hand vigorously. Then he approached Christine, and kissed little Jacques, who had once more thrown off the bedclothes.
At that moment, Claude walked in, and upon seeing his old friend, he let out a happy shout and shook his hand enthusiastically. Then he went over to Christine and kissed little Jacques, who had once again kicked off the blankets.
‘How is he?’
'How's he doing?'
‘Just the same.’
"Same deal."
‘To be sure, to be sure; he is growing too fast. A few days’ rest will set him all right. I told you not to be uneasy.’
‘For sure, for sure; he’s growing up too quickly. A few days of rest will fix him right up. I told you not to worry.’
And Claude thereupon sat down beside Sandoz on the couch. They both took their ease, leaning back, with their eyes surveying the picture; while Christine, seated by the bed, looked at nothing, and seemingly thought of nothing, in the everlasting desolation of her heart. Night was slowly coming on, the vivid light from the window paled already, losing its sheen amidst the slowly-falling crepuscular dimness.
And Claude sat down next to Sandoz on the couch. They both relaxed, leaning back and taking in the scene, while Christine, sitting by the bed, stared blankly, seemingly lost in thought in the endless emptiness of her heart. Night was slowly creeping in, the bright light from the window fading and losing its brightness in the soft darkness of dusk.
‘So it’s settled; your wife told me that you were going to send it in.’
‘So it’s settled; your wife informed me that you would be sending it in.’
‘Yes.’
"Yep."
‘You are right; you had better have done with it once for all. Oh, there are some magnificent bits in it. The quay in perspective to the left, the man who shoulders that sack below. But—’
‘You’re right; it’s better to deal with it all at once. Oh, there are some amazing parts in it. The dock viewed from the left, the guy carrying that sack below. But—’
He hesitated, then finally took the bull by the horns.
He hesitated, then finally faced the challenge head-on.
‘But, it’s odd that you have persisted in leaving those women nude. It isn’t logical, I assure you; and, besides, you promised me you would dress them—don’t you remember? You have set your heart upon them very much then?’
‘But, it’s strange that you keep leaving those women naked. It doesn’t make sense, I promise you; and besides, you promised me you would dress them—don’t you remember? You really seem to care about them a lot then?’
‘Yes.’
'Yeah.'
Claude answered curtly, with the obstinacy of one mastered by a fixed idea and unwilling to give any explanations. Then he crossed his arms behind his head, and began talking of other things, without, however, taking his eyes off his picture, over which the twilight began to cast a slight shadow.
Claude replied shortly, stubbornly clinging to a single idea and refusing to explain anything. Then he crossed his arms behind his head and started talking about other topics, still keeping his eyes on his painting, which was starting to be covered by the evening's shadows.
‘Do you know where I have just come from?’ he asked. ‘I have been to Courajod’s. You know, the great landscape painter, whose “Pond of Gagny” is at the Luxembourg. You remember, I thought he was dead, and we were told that he lived hereabouts, on the other side of the hill, in the Rue de l’Abreuvoir. Well, old boy, he worried me, did Courajod. While taking a breath of air now and then up there, I discovered his shanty, and I could no longer pass in front of it without wanting to go inside. Just think, a master, a man who invented our modern landscape school, and who lives there, unknown, done for, like a mole in its hole! You can have no idea of the street or the caboose: a village street, full of fowls, and bordered by grassy banks; and a caboose like a child’s toy, with tiny windows, a tiny door, a tiny garden. Oh! the garden—a mere patch of soil, sloping down abruptly, with a bed where four pear trees stand, and the rest taken up by a fowl-house, made out of green boards, old plaster, and wire network, held together with bits of string.’
‘Do you know where I just came from?’ he asked. ‘I’ve been to Courajod’s. You know, the famous landscape painter whose “Pond of Gagny” is at the Luxembourg. Remember, I thought he was dead, and we were told he lived around here, on the other side of the hill, in the Rue de l’Abreuvoir. Well, let me tell you, Courajod got to me. While I was up there catching some fresh air, I stumbled upon his place, and I couldn’t just walk by without feeling the urge to go inside. Just imagine, a master, a guy who created our modern landscape school, living there, unnoticed, all washed up, like a mole in its burrow! You can’t picture the street or the little house: a village street, filled with chickens, flanked by grassy banks; and the house is like a child’s toy, with tiny windows, a tiny door, and a tiny garden. Oh! The garden—just a little patch of dirt, sloping down steeply, with a patch where four pear trees grow and the rest taken up by a chicken coop made of green boards, old plaster, and wire mesh, all held together with bits of string.’
His words came slowly; he blinked while he spoke as if the thought of his picture had returned to him and was gradually taking possession of him, to such a degree as to hamper him in his speech about other matters.
His words came out slowly; he blinked as he spoke, as if the image of his picture had come back to him and was slowly taking over, making it hard for him to talk about anything else.
‘Well, as luck would have it, I found Courajod on his doorstep to-day. An old man of more than eighty, wrinkled and shrunk to the size of a boy. I should like you to see him, with his clogs, his peasant’s jersey and his coloured handkerchief wound over his head as if he were an old market-woman. I pluckily went up to him, saying, “Monsieur Courajod, I know you very well; you have a picture in the Luxembourg Gallery which is a masterpiece. Allow a painter to shake hands with you as he would with his master.” And then you should have seen him take fright, draw back and stutter, as if I were going to strike him. A regular flight! However, I followed him, and gradually he recovered his composure, and showed me his hens, his ducks, his rabbits and dogs—an extraordinary collection of birds and beasts; there was even a raven among them. He lives in the midst of them all; he speaks to no one but his animals. As for the view, it’s simply magnificent; you see the whole of the St. Denis plain for miles upon miles; rivers and towns, smoking factory-chimneys, and puffing railway-engines; in short, the place is a real hermitage on a hill, with its back turned to Paris and its eyes fixed on the boundless country. As a matter of course, I came back to his picture. “Oh, Monsieur Courajod,” said I, “what talent you showed! If you only knew how much we all admire you. You are one of our illustrious men; you’ll remain the ancestor of us all.” But his lips began to tremble again; he looked at me with an air of terror-stricken stupidity; I am sure he would not have waved me back with a more imploring gesture if I had unearthed under his very eyes the corpse of some forgotten comrade of his youth. He kept chewing disconnected words between his toothless gums; it was the mumbling of an old man who had sunk into second childhood, and whom it’s impossible to understand. “Don’t know—so long ago—too old—don’t care a rap.” To make a long story short, he showed me the door; I heard him hurriedly turn the key in lock, barricading himself and his birds and animals against the admiration of the outside world. Ah, my good fellow, the idea of it! That great man ending his life like a retired grocer; that voluntary relapse into “nothingness” even before death. Ah, the glory, the glory for which we others are ready to die!’
‘Well, as luck would have it, I found Courajod on his doorstep today. An old man of over eighty, wrinkled and shrunk to the size of a boy. I’d love for you to see him, with his clogs, his peasant’s jersey, and a colorful handkerchief wrapped around his head like an old market woman. I bravely approached him, saying, “Monsieur Courajod, I know you very well; you have a painting in the Luxembourg Gallery that’s a masterpiece. Let a painter shake your hand as he would with his master.” And then you should have seen him get frightened, pull back, and stutter, as if I were going to hit him. A complete panic! However, I followed him, and eventually he calmed down and showed me his hens, his ducks, his rabbits, and dogs—an incredible collection of birds and animals; there was even a raven among them. He lives surrounded by them all; he talks to no one but his animals. As for the view, it’s simply amazing; you can see the entire St. Denis plain stretching for miles—rivers and towns, smoking factory smokestacks, and puffing train engines; in short, the place is a real hermitage on a hill, with its back turned to Paris and its gaze fixed on the vast countryside. Naturally, I came back to his painting. “Oh, Monsieur Courajod,” I said, “what talent you showed! If you only knew how much we all admire you. You’re one of our greats; you’ll remain the ancestor of us all.” But his lips began to tremble again; he looked at me with a look of terror-stricken confusion; I’m sure he wouldn’t have waved me off with a more desperate gesture if I had unearthed the corpse of some long-forgotten friend of his youth right in front of him. He kept mumbling half-formed words between his toothless gums; it was the rambling of an old man who had slipped into a childlike state, and whom it’s impossible to understand. “Don’t know—so long ago—too old—don’t care a bit.” To sum it all up, he showed me the door; I heard him hurriedly turn the key in the lock, barricading himself and his birds and animals against the admiration of the outside world. Ah, my good fellow, the thought of it! That great man ending his life like a retired grocer; that voluntary retreat into “nothingness” even before death. Ah, the glory, the glory for which we others are ready to die!’
Claude’s voice, which had sunk lower and lower, died away at last in a melancholy sigh. Darkness was still coming on; after gradually collecting in the corners, it rose like a slow, inexorable tide, first submerging the legs of the chairs and the table, all the confusion of things that littered the tiled floor. The lower part of the picture was already growing dim, and Claude, with his eyes still desperately fixed on it, seemed to be watching the ascent of the darkness as if he had at last judged his work in the expiring light. And no sound was heard save the stertorous breathing of the sick child, near whom there still loomed the dark silhouette of the motionless mother.
Claude’s voice, which had gradually gotten softer, finally faded away into a sad sigh. Darkness was still creeping in; after slowly gathering in the corners, it rose like a relentless tide, first covering the legs of the chairs and the table, along with all the clutter scattered across the tiled floor. The lower part of the painting was already becoming dim, and Claude, with his eyes still desperately fixed on it, seemed to be observing the rise of the darkness as if he was finally assessing his work in the fading light. The only sound that broke the silence was the labored breathing of the sick child, near whom the dark silhouette of the motionless mother still hovered.
Then Sandoz spoke in his turn, his hands also crossed behind his head, and his back resting against one of the cushions of the couch.
Then Sandoz spoke next, his hands crossed behind his head, and his back resting against one of the couch cushions.
‘Does one ever know? Would it not be better, perhaps, to live and die unknown? What a sell it would be if artistic glory existed no more than the Paradise which is talked about in catechisms and which even children nowadays make fun of! We, who no longer believe in the Divinity, still believe in our own immortality. What a farce it all is!’
‘Can anyone really know? Wouldn't it be better, maybe, to live and die without recognition? How disappointing it would be if artistic glory was as imaginary as the Paradise mentioned in catechisms, which even kids today joke about! We, who no longer believe in God, still hold on to the idea of our own immortality. What a joke it all is!’
Then, affected to melancholy himself by the mournfulness of the twilight, and stirred by all the human suffering he beheld around him, he began to speak of his own torments.
Then, feeling sad himself due to the gloomy twilight and moved by all the human suffering he saw around him, he started talking about his own struggles.
‘Look here, old man, I, whom you envy, perhaps—yes, I, who am beginning to get on in the world, as middle-class people say—I, who publish books and earn a little money—well, I am being killed by it all. I have often already told you this, but you don’t believe me, because, as you only turn out work with a deal of trouble and cannot bring yourself to public notice, happiness in your eyes could naturally consist in producing a great deal, in being seen, and praised or slated. Well, get admitted to the next Salon, get into the thick of the battle, paint other pictures, and then tell me whether that suffices, and whether you are happy at last. Listen; work has taken up the whole of my existence. Little by little, it has robbed me of my mother, of my wife, of everything I love. It is like a germ thrown into the cranium, which feeds on the brain, finds its way into the trunk and limbs, and gnaws up the whole of the body. The moment I jump out of bed of a morning, work clutches hold of me, rivets me to my desk without leaving me time to get a breath of fresh air; then it pursues me at luncheon—I audibly chew my sentences with my bread. Next it accompanies me when I go out, comes back with me and dines off the same plate as myself; lies down with me on my pillow, so utterly pitiless that I am never able to set the book in hand on one side; indeed, its growth continues even in the depth of my sleep. And nothing outside of it exists for me. True, I go upstairs to embrace my mother, but in so absent-minded a way, that ten minutes after leaving her I ask myself whether I have really been to wish her good-morning. My poor wife has no husband; I am not with her even when our hands touch. Sometimes I have an acute feeling that I am making their lives very sad, and I feel very remorseful, for happiness is solely composed of kindness, frankness and gaiety in one’s home; but how can I escape from the claws of the monster? I at once relapse into the somnambulism of my working hours, into the indifference and moroseness of my fixed idea. If the pages I have written during the morning have been worked off all right, so much the better; if one of them has remained in distress, so much the worse. The household will laugh or cry according to the whim of that all-devouring monster—Work. No, no! I have nothing that I can call my own. In my days of poverty I dreamt of rest in the country, of travel in distant lands; and now that I might make those dreams reality, the work that has been begun keeps me shut up. There is no chance of a walk in the morning’s sun, no chance of running round to a friend’s house, or of a mad bout of idleness! My strength of will has gone with the rest; all this has become a habit; I have locked the door of the world behind me, and thrown the key out of the window. There is no longer anything in my den but work and myself—and work will devour me, and then there will be nothing left, nothing at all!’
‘Look here, old man, I know you might envy me—yes, I, who am starting to make my way in the world, like middle-class folks say—I, who publish books and make a bit of money—well, I’m being crushed by it all. I’ve told you this many times, but you don’t believe me because you struggle to create and can’t seem to get noticed. Your happiness must come from producing a lot, getting seen, and being praised or criticized. Well, get into the next Salon, dive into the chaos, paint different pictures, and then tell me if that’s enough and if you’re finally happy. Listen; work has taken over my entire life. Gradually, it’s taken away my mother, my wife, everything I love. It’s like a germ lodged in my brain that feeds on it, spreads throughout my body, and devours me. The moment I get out of bed in the morning, work grabs hold of me, ties me to my desk, leaving no time to catch my breath; then it follows me to lunch—I literally chew on my sentences along with my bread. Next, it comes with me when I go out, returns with me, shares the same plate at dinner; it lays down with me on my pillow, so relentless that I can’t ever set aside the book I’m working on; in fact, it keeps growing even while I sleep. Nothing else exists for me. True, I go upstairs to hug my mother, but I do it so absentmindedly that ten minutes after leaving her, I question whether I really wished her good morning. My poor wife doesn’t have a husband; I’m not really there for her, even when our hands touch. Sometimes, I deeply feel that I’m making their lives miserable, and it troubles me because happiness comes from kindness, honesty, and joy at home; but how can I escape the grip of this monster? I immediately slip back into the daze of my work hours, into the indifference and gloom of my obsession. If the pages I wrote in the morning turned out well, great; if one of them is a mess, that’s bad. The household will react with laughter or tears based on the mood of that all-consuming monster—Work. No, no! I don’t have anything I can claim as my own. When I was poor, I dreamed of resting in the countryside, traveling to distant lands; and now that I could make those dreams real, the work I’ve started keeps me trapped. There’s no chance for a walk in the morning sun, no chance to drop by a friend’s house, or to indulge in a wild bout of idleness! My willpower has vanished along with everything else; this has all become a habit; I’ve locked the door to the outside world and thrown the key out the window. There’s nothing left in my lair but work and myself—and work will consume me, leaving nothing behind, nothing at all!’
He paused, and silence reigned once more in the deepening gloom. Then he began again with an effort:
He paused, and silence filled the room again as the darkness deepened. Then he started again, struggling to find the words:
‘And if one were only satisfied, if one only got some enjoyment out of such a nigger’s life! Ah! I should like to know how those fellows manage who smoke cigarettes and complacently stroke their beards while they are at work. Yes, it appears to me that there are some who find production an easy pleasure, to be set aside or taken up without the least excitement. They are delighted, they admire themselves, they cannot write a couple of lines but they find those lines of a rare, distinguished, matchless quality. Well, as for myself, I bring forth in anguish, and my offspring seems a horror to me. How can a man be sufficiently wanting in self-doubt as to believe in himself? It absolutely amazes me to see men, who furiously deny talent to everybody else, lose all critical acumen, all common-sense, when it becomes a question of their own bastard creations. Why, a book is always very ugly. To like it one mustn’t have had a hand in the cooking of it. I say nothing of the jugsful of insults that are showered upon one. Instead of annoying, they rather encourage me. I see men who are upset by attacks, who feel a humiliating craving to win sympathy. It is a simple question of temperament; some women would die if they failed to please. But, to my thinking, insult is a very good medicine to take; unpopularity is a very manly school to be brought up in. Nothing keeps one in such good health and strength as the hooting of a crowd of imbeciles. It suffices that a man can say that he has given his life’s blood to his work; that he expects neither immediate justice nor serious attention; that he works without hope of any kind, and simply because the love of work beats beneath his skin like his heart, irrespective of any will of his own. If he can do all this, he may die in the effort with the consoling illusion that he will be appreciated one day or other. Ah! if the others only knew how jauntily I bear the weight of their anger. Only there is my own choler, which overwhelms me; I fret that I cannot live for a moment happy. What hours of misery I spend, great heavens! from the very day I begin a novel. During the first chapters there isn’t so much trouble. I have plenty of room before me in which to display genius. But afterwards I become distracted, and am never satisfied with the daily task; I condemn the book before it is finished, judging it inferior to its elders; and I torture myself about certain pages, about certain sentences, certain words, so that at last the very commas assume an ugly look, from which I suffer. And when it is finished—ah! when it is finished, what a relief! Not the enjoyment of the gentleman who exalts himself in the worship of his offspring, but the curse of the labourer who throws down the burden that has been breaking his back. Then, later on, with another book, it all begins afresh; it will always begin afresh, and I shall die under it, furious with myself, exasperated at not having had more talent, enraged at not leaving a “work” more complete, of greater dimensions—books upon books, a pile of mountain height! And at my death I shall feel horrible doubts about the task I may have accomplished, asking myself whether I ought not to have gone to the left when I went to the right, and my last word, my last gasp, will be to recommence the whole over again—’
‘And if only one could find satisfaction, if one could actually enjoy such a life! Ah! I’d love to know how those guys manage to smoke cigarettes and casually stroke their beards while they work. Yes, it seems to me that some people find production to be an easy pleasure, something they can pick up or put down without the slightest bit of excitement. They are so pleased with themselves, they can’t write a couple of lines but believe those lines are of extraordinary, unmatched quality. Well, as for me, I struggle to create, and my work feels like a horror to me. How can someone be so lacking in self-doubt as to actually believe in themselves? It completely amazes me to see men who passionately deny talent to everyone else lose all sense of judgment and common sense when it comes to their own mediocre creations. Why, a book is always ugly. To like it, you must not have had any part in creating it. I won’t even mention the stream of insults that come my way. Instead of bothering me, they actually motivate me. I see men who get upset by criticism, who feel a desperate need to gain sympathy. It’s just a matter of temperament; some women would be devastated if they couldn’t please others. But to me, insult is a valuable remedy; being unpopular is a tough but effective school. Nothing keeps you healthier and stronger than the jeers of a crowd of fools. It’s enough for a man to say he’s poured his life’s blood into his work; that he doesn’t expect immediate fairness or serious recognition; that he works without any hope, simply because the love for his craft pulses through him like his heartbeat, regardless of his own will. If he can do all this, he may die in the attempt with the comforting delusion that he will be appreciated someday. Ah! if only others knew how lightly I carry the weight of their anger. But there’s my own anger that overwhelms me; I’m frustrated that I can’t live for a moment in happiness. What hours of misery I go through, good heavens! from the very day I start a novel. The first chapters aren’t so bad. I have plenty of space in front of me to show off my genius. But after that, I get distracted and am never satisfied with my daily progress; I condemn the book before it’s finished, deeming it inferior to previous works; and I torment myself over certain pages, certain sentences, specific words, until even the commas start to look ugly, which I suffer for. And when it’s done—ah! when it’s done, what a relief! Not the joy of the gentleman who revels in the praise of his offspring, but the curse of a laborer who finally sets down the burden that’s been breaking his back. Then later, with another book, it all starts again; it will always start again, and I will die under it, furious with myself, exasperated for not having more talent, angry that I haven’t left behind a more complete “work,” something of greater size—books upon books, a pile as high as a mountain! And at my death, I will have terrible doubts about the work I’ve done, wondering if I should have gone left when I went right, and my last word, my last breath, will be to start it all over again—’
He was thoroughly moved; the words stuck in his throat; he was obliged to draw breath for a moment before delivering himself of this passionate cry in which all his impenitent lyricism took wing:
He was completely touched; the words caught in his throat; he had to take a moment to breathe before letting out this passionate cry where all his unapologetic lyricism soared:
Ah, life! a second span of life, who shall give it to me, that work may rob me of it again—that I may die of it once more?’
Ah, life! Who will give me a second chance at life, so that work can take it away again—that I might die once more from it?
It had now become quite dark; the mother’s rigid silhouette was no longer visible; the hoarse breathing of the child sounded amidst the obscurity like a terrible and distant signal of distress, uprising from the streets. In the whole studio, which had become lugubriously black, the big canvas only showed a glimpse of pallidity, a last vestige of the waning daylight. The nude figure, similar to an agonising vision, seemed to be floating about, without definite shape, the legs having already vanished, one arm being already submerged, and the only part at all distinct being the trunk, which shone like a silvery moon.
It had grown quite dark; the mother’s stiff outline was no longer visible; the child’s ragged breathing echoed through the darkness like a terrible, distant cry for help coming from the streets. In the entire studio, which had turned a gloomy black, the large canvas barely reflected a hint of paleness, a last remnant of the fading daylight. The nude figure, resembling a haunting vision, seemed to drift without a clear shape, with its legs already disappeared, one arm already submerged, and the only part that was at all distinct being the torso, which glimmered like a silvery moon.
After a protracted pause, Sandoz inquired:
After a long pause, Sandoz asked:
‘Shall I go with you when you take your picture?’
‘Should I come with you when you take your picture?’
Getting no answer from Claude, he fancied he could hear him crying. Was it with the same infinite sadness, the despair by which he himself had been stirred just now? He waited for a moment, then repeated his question, and at last the painter, after choking down a sob, stammered:
Getting no answer from Claude, he thought he could hear him crying. Was it with the same deep sadness, the despair that had just stirred him? He waited for a moment, then repeated his question, and finally the painter, after holding back a sob, stammered:
‘Thanks, the picture will remain here; I sha’n’t send it.’
‘Thanks, the picture will stay here; I won’t send it.’
‘What? Why, you had made up your mind?’
"What? Seriously, you decided?"
‘Yes, yes, I had made up my mind; but I had not seen it as I saw it just now in the waning daylight. I have failed with it, failed with it again—it struck my eyes like a blow, it went to my very heart.’
‘Yes, yes, I had made up my mind; but I hadn't seen it the way I do now in the fading light. I've messed it up, messed it up again—it hit me like a punch, it pierced right through to my heart.’
His tears now flowed slow and scalding in the gloom that hid him from sight. He had been restraining himself, and now the silent anguish which had consumed him burst forth despite all his efforts.
His tears now flowed slowly and hot in the darkness that concealed him. He had been holding back, but now the silent pain that had consumed him erupted despite all his attempts.
‘My poor friend,’ said Sandoz, quite upset; ‘it is hard to tell you so, but all the same you are right, perhaps, in delaying matters to finish certain parts rather more. Still I am angry with myself, for I shall imagine that it was I who discouraged you by my everlasting stupid discontent with things.’
‘My poor friend,’ said Sandoz, feeling really upset; ‘it’s tough to tell you this, but you might be right to put things on hold to finish certain parts a bit more. Still, I’m mad at myself because I can’t help but think that it was me who discouraged you with my constant, stupid dissatisfaction with everything.’
Claude simply answered:
Claude just replied:
‘You! what an idea! I was not even listening to you. No; I was looking, and I saw everything go helter-skelter in that confounded canvas. The light was dying away, and all at once, in the greyish dusk, the scales suddenly dropped from my eyes. The background alone is pretty; the nude woman is altogether too loud; what’s more, she’s out of the perpendicular, and her legs are badly drawn. When I noticed that, ah! it was enough to kill me there and then; I felt life departing from me. Then the gloom kept rising and rising, bringing a whirling sensation, a foundering of everything, the earth rolling into chaos, the end of the world. And soon I only saw the trunk waning like a sickly moon. And look, look! there now remains nothing of her, not a glimpse; she is dead, quite black!’
‘You! What a thought! I wasn’t even paying attention to you. No; I was watching, and I saw everything going crazy in that awful painting. The light was fading, and suddenly, in the grayish dusk, everything became clear to me. The background is nice; the naked woman is way too over-the-top; plus, she’s off balance, and her legs are poorly drawn. When I realized that, oh! it was enough to make me feel like I was dying right there; I felt life slipping away. Then the darkness kept rising and rising, creating a dizzying sensation, everything falling apart, the earth spinning into chaos, the end of the world. Before long, I could only see the trunk fading like a sickly moon. And look, look! There’s nothing left of her, not even a trace; she’s gone, completely dark!’
In fact, the picture had at last entirely disappeared. But the painter had risen and could be heard swearing in the dense obscurity.
In fact, the picture had finally vanished completely. But the painter had gotten up and could be heard cursing in the thick darkness.
‘D—n it all, it doesn’t matter, I’ll set to work at it again—’
‘Damn it all, it doesn’t matter, I’ll get back to work on it again—’
Then Christine, who had also risen from her chair, against which he stumbled, interrupted him, saying: ‘Take care, I’ll light the lamp.’
Then Christine, who had also gotten up from her chair, which he stumbled against, interrupted him, saying: ‘Be careful, I’ll turn on the lamp.’
She lighted it and came back looking very pale, casting a glance of hatred and fear at the picture. It was not to go then? The abomination was to begin once more!
She lit it and returned looking very pale, shooting a glance of hatred and fear at the picture. Was it not going to happen then? The horror was set to begin again!
‘I’ll set to work at it again,’ repeated Claude, ‘and it shall kill me, it shall kill my wife, my child, the whole lot; but, by heaven, it shall be a masterpiece!’
‘I’ll get back to work on it,’ Claude said again, ‘and it’ll either kill me, my wife, my child, and everyone else; but I swear, it will be a masterpiece!’
Christine sat down again; they approached Jacques, who had thrown the clothes off once more with his feverish little hands. He was still breathing heavily, lying quite inert, his head buried in the pillow like a weight, with which the bed seemed to creak. When Sandoz was on the point of going, he expressed his uneasiness. The mother appeared stupefied; while the father was already returning to his picture, the masterpiece which awaited creation, and the thought of which filled him with such passionate illusions that he gave less heed to the painful reality of the sufferings of his child, the true living flesh of his flesh.
Christine sat down again; they approached Jacques, who had tossed his clothes off once more with his frantic little hands. He was still breathing heavily, lying completely still, his head sunk into the pillow like a heavy weight, causing the bed to creak. Just as Sandoz was about to leave, he voiced his concerns. The mother looked stunned; meanwhile, the father was already returning to his painting, the masterpiece that was waiting to be created, and the thought of it consumed him with such passionate dreams that he paid less attention to the painful reality of his child's suffering, the true living flesh of his flesh.
On the following morning, Claude had just finished dressing, when he heard Christine calling in a frightened voice. She also had just woke with a start from the heavy sleep which had benumbed her while she sat watching the sick child.
On the next morning, Claude had just finished getting dressed when he heard Christine calling out in a scared voice. She had also just woken up suddenly from the deep sleep that had numbed her while she sat watching over the sick child.
‘Claude! Claude! Oh, look! He is dead.’
‘Claude! Claude! Oh, look! He’s dead.’
The painter rushed forward, with heavy eyes, stumbling, and apparently failing to understand, for he repeated with an air of profound amazement, ‘What do you mean by saying he is dead?’
The painter hurried forward, with tired eyes, stumbling and seemingly confused, as he expressed with deep astonishment, ‘What do you mean by saying he is dead?’
For a moment they remained staring wildly at the bed. The poor little fellow, with his disproportionate head—the head of the progeny of genius, exaggerated as to verge upon cretinism—did not appear to have stirred since the previous night; but no breath came from his mouth, which had widened and become discoloured, and his glassy eyes were open. His father laid his hands upon him and found him icy cold.
For a moment, they stood there, wide-eyed, staring at the bed. The poor little guy, with his oversized head—the type you'd expect from a genius but taken to the point of looking almost like a cretin—seemed not to have moved since the night before. But there was no breath coming from his mouth, which had grown wide and discolored, and his glassy eyes were open. His father placed his hands on him and realized he was icy cold.
‘It is true, he is dead.’
"Yeah, it's true, he's dead."
And their stupor was such that for yet another moment they remained with their eyes dry, simply thunderstruck, as it were, by the abruptness of that death which they considered incredible.
And they were so shocked that for another moment they just stood there with dry eyes, completely stunned by the suddenness of a death they found hard to believe.
Then, her knees bending under her, Christine dropped down in front of the bed, bursting into violent sobs which shook her from head to foot, and wringing her hands, whilst her forehead remained pressed against the mattress. In that first moment of horror her despair was aggravated above all by poignant remorse—the remorse of not having sufficiently cared for the poor child. Former days started up before her in a rapid vision, each bringing with it regretfulness for unkind words, deferred caresses, rough treatment even. And now it was all over; she would never be able to compensate the lad for the affection she had withheld from him. He whom she thought so disobedient had obeyed but too well at last. She had so often told him when at play to be still, and not to disturb his father at his work, that he was quiet at last, and for ever. The idea suffocated her; each sob drew from her a dull moan.
Then, her knees buckling beneath her, Christine dropped down in front of the bed, bursting into violent sobs that shook her from head to toe. She wrung her hands while her forehead stayed pressed against the mattress. In that first moment of horror, her despair was deepened by intense remorse—the regret of not having cared enough for the poor child. Memories from the past flashed before her, each bringing a wave of regret for unkind words, missed moments of affection, and even harsh treatment. And now it was all over; she would never be able to make it up to the boy for the love she had held back. The one she thought so disobedient had finally obeyed too well. She had told him so often during play to be quiet and not disturb his father at work that now he was silent forever. The thought suffocated her; each sob tore a dull moan from her.
Claude had begun walking up and down the studio, unable to remain still. With his features convulsed, he shed a few big tears, which he brushed away with the back of his hand. And whenever he passed in front of the little corpse he could not help glancing at it. The glassy eyes, wide open, seemed to exercise a spell over him. At first he resisted, but a confused idea assumed shape within him, and would not be shaken off. He yielded to it at last, took a small canvas, and began to paint a study of the dead child. For the first few minutes his tears dimmed his sight, wrapping everything in a mist; but he kept wiping them away, and persevered with his work, even though his brush shook. Then the passion for art dried his tears and steadied his hand, and in a little while it was no longer his icy son that lay there, but merely a model, a subject, the strange interest of which stirred him. That huge head, that waxy flesh, those eyes which looked like holes staring into space—all excited and thrilled him. He stepped back, seemed to take pleasure in his work, and vaguely smiled at it.
Claude started pacing the studio, unable to stay still. With his face twisted in emotion, he let out a few big tears, which he wiped away with the back of his hand. Every time he passed the small corpse, he couldn’t help but glance at it. The glassy, wide-open eyes seemed to cast a spell on him. At first, he fought against it, but a confused idea took shape in his mind and wouldn't go away. Finally, he gave in, grabbed a small canvas, and began painting a study of the dead child. For the first few minutes, his tears blurred his vision, wrapping everything in a haze; but he kept wiping them away and pressed on with his work, even as his brush trembled. Then, the passion for art dried his tears and steadied his hand, and soon it was no longer his icy son lying there, but just a model, a subject, the odd fascination of which stirred him. That huge head, that waxy skin, those eyes that looked like voids staring into space—all excited and thrilled him. He stepped back, seemed to enjoy his work, and vaguely smiled at it.
When Christine rose from her knees, she found him thus occupied. Then, bursting into tears again, she merely said:
When Christine got up from her knees, she found him busy like that. Then, breaking down in tears again, she just said:
‘Ah! you can paint him now, he’ll never stir again.’
‘Ah! you can paint him now; he’ll never move again.’
For five hours Claude kept at it, and on the second day, when Sandoz came back with him from the cemetery, after the funeral, he shuddered with pity and admiration at the sight of the small canvas. It was one of the fine bits of former days, a masterpiece of limpidity and power, to which was added a note of boundless melancholy, the end of everything—all life ebbing away with the death of that child.
For five hours, Claude kept at it, and on the second day, when Sandoz returned with him from the cemetery after the funeral, he felt a mix of pity and admiration at the sight of the small canvas. It was one of those beautiful pieces from earlier times, a masterpiece of clarity and strength, infused with a sense of deep sadness, representing the end of everything—all life fading away with the death of that child.
But Sandoz, who had burst out into exclamations fall of praise, was quite taken aback on hearing Claude say to him:
But Sandoz, who had burst into exclamations full of praise, was quite surprised to hear Claude say to him:
‘You are sure you like it? In that case, as the other machine isn’t ready, I’ll send this to the Salon.’
‘Are you sure you like it? If so, since the other machine isn’t ready, I’ll send this to the Salon.’
X
ONE morning, as Claude, who had taken ‘The Dead Child’ to the Palais de l’Industrie the previous day, was roaming round about the Parc Monceau, he suddenly came upon Fagerolles.
ONE morning, as Claude, who had taken ‘The Dead Child’ to the Palais de l’Industrie the day before, was wandering around Parc Monceau, he unexpectedly ran into Fagerolles.
‘What!’ said the latter, cordially, ‘is it you, old fellow? What’s becoming of you? What are you doing? We see so little of each other now.’
‘What!’ said the latter, warmly, ‘is it really you, my old friend? What’s going on with you? What are you up to? We hardly see each other anymore.’
Then, Claude having mentioned what he had sent to the Salon—that little canvas which his mind was full of—Fagerolles added:
Then, Claude mentioned what he had sent to the Salon—that small canvas that was occupying his thoughts—Fagerolles added:
‘Ah! you’ve sent something; then I’ll get it “hung” for you. You know that I’m a candidate for the hanging committee this year.’
‘Ah! you’ve sent something; then I’ll get it “hung” for you. You know that I’m running for the hanging committee this year.’
Indeed, amid the tumult and everlasting discontent of the artists, after attempts at reform, repeated a score of times and then abandoned, the authorities had just invested the exhibitors with the privilege of electing the members of the hanging committee; and this had quite upset the world of painters and sculptors, a perfect electoral fever had set in, with all sorts of ambitious cabals and intrigues—all the low jobbery, indeed, by which politics are dishonoured.
Indeed, amidst the chaos and ongoing dissatisfaction of the artists, after attempts at reform that had been made several times and then discarded, the authorities had just granted the exhibitors the right to elect the members of the hanging committee. This completely shook up the world of painters and sculptors; an electoral frenzy had taken over, complete with all kinds of ambitious plots and schemes—basically all the shady dealings that tarnish politics.
‘I’m going to take you with me,’ continued Fagerolles; you must come and see how I’m settled in my little house, in which you haven’t yet set foot, in spite of all your promises. It’s there, hard by, at the corner of the Avenue de Villiers.’
‘I’m going to take you with me,’ Fagerolles said; you have to come and see how I’ve set up my little house, which you haven’t even visited yet, despite all your promises. It’s right there, at the corner of Avenue de Villiers.’
Claude, whose arm he had gaily taken, was obliged to follow him. He was seized with a fit of cowardice; the idea that his old chum might get his picture ‘hung’ for him filled him with mingled shame and desire. On reaching the avenue, he stopped in front of the house to look at its frontage, a bit of coquettish, precioso architectural tracery—the exact copy of a Renaissance house at Bourges, with lattice windows, a staircase tower, and a roof decked with leaden ornaments. It looked like the abode of a harlot; and Claude was struck with surprise when, on turning round, he recognised Irma Bécot’s regal mansion just over the way. Huge, substantial, almost severe of aspect, it had all the importance of a palace compared to its neighbour, the dwelling of the artist, who was obliged to limit himself to a fanciful nick-nack.
Claude, who he had cheerfully taken by the arm, had no choice but to follow him. He was hit with a wave of cowardice; the thought that his old friend might get his artwork displayed for him filled him with a mix of shame and longing. When they reached the avenue, he paused in front of the house to take in its façade, a bit of flirtatious, precioso architectural detail—the exact replica of a Renaissance house in Bourges, with lattice windows, a staircase tower, and a roof adorned with lead ornaments. It looked like the residence of a courtesan; Claude was taken aback when, turning around, he recognized Irma Bécot’s grand mansion just across the street. Large, sturdy, almost austere in appearance, it carried all the weight of a palace compared to its neighbor, the home of the artist, who had to settle for a whimsical trinket.
‘Ah! that Irma, eh?’ said Fagerolles with just a shade of respect in his tone. ‘She has got a cathedral and no mistake! But come in.’
‘Ah! that Irma, huh?’ said Fagerolles with a hint of respect in his tone. ‘She’s really something! But come in.’
The interior of Fagerolles’ house was strangely and magnificently luxurious. Old tapestry, old weapons, a heap of old furniture, Chinese and Japanese curios were displayed even in the very hall. On the left there was a dining-room, panelled with lacquer work and having its ceiling draped with a design of a red dragon. Then there was a staircase of carved wood above which banners drooped, whilst tropical plants rose up like plumes. Overhead, the studio was a marvel, though rather small and without a picture visible. The walls, indeed, were entirely covered with Oriental hangings, while at one end rose up a huge chimney-piece with chimerical monsters supporting the tablet, and at the other extremity appeared a vast couch under a tent—the latter quite a monument, with lances upholding the sumptuous drapery, above a collection of carpets, furs and cushions heaped together almost on a level with the flooring.
The inside of Fagerolles’ house was oddly and impressively luxurious. Old tapestries, antique weapons, a bunch of old furniture, and Chinese and Japanese curios were displayed even in the entrance hall. To the left, there was a dining room, paneled with lacquer work and featuring a ceiling draped with a design of a red dragon. Then there was a carved wooden staircase above which banners hung down, while tropical plants rose up like plumes. Above, the studio was amazing, although a bit small and with no visible artwork. The walls were completely covered with Oriental hangings, while at one end there was a huge fireplace with mythical creatures supporting the mantel, and at the other end was a large couch under a tent—quite a monument, with lances holding up the luxurious drapery, set above a collection of carpets, furs, and cushions piled up almost level with the floor.
Claude looked at it all, and there came to his lips a question which he held back—Was all this paid for? Fagerolles, who had been decorated with the Legion of Honour the previous year, now asked, it was said, ten thousand francs for painting a mere portrait. Naudet, who, after launching him, duly turned his success to profit in a methodical fashion, never let one of his pictures go for less than twenty, thirty, forty thousand francs. Orders would have fallen on the painter’s shoulders as thick as hail, if he had not affected the disdain, the weariness of the man whose slightest sketches are fought for. And yet all this display of luxury smacked of indebtedness, there was only so much paid on account to the upholsterers; all the money—the money won by lucky strokes as on ‘Change—slipped through the artist’s fingers, and was spent without trace of it remaining. Moreover, Fagerolles, still in the full flush of his sudden good fortune, did not calculate or worry, being confident that he would always sell his works at higher and higher prices, and feeling glorious at the high position he was acquiring in contemporary art.
Claude looked at everything and a question came to his mind that he held back—Was all of this paid for? Fagerolles, who had received the Legion of Honour the year before, was now reportedly asking ten thousand francs just to paint a simple portrait. Naudet, who had helped launch his career and was now methodically profiting from his success, never let one of Fagerolles's paintings go for less than twenty, thirty, or even forty thousand francs. Orders would have come pouring in for the painter if he hadn't pretended to be indifferent and tired, like someone whose slightest sketches are highly sought after. Yet, all this show of luxury felt like debt; only a small amount had been paid to the upholsterers. All the money—the kind that comes from lucky deals like on the stock exchange—slipped through the artist’s fingers, spent without leaving a trace. Moreover, Fagerolles, still riding the wave of his sudden success, didn't bother to calculate or worry, believing he would always sell his works for higher prices, feeling proud of the high status he was gaining in contemporary art.
Eventually, Claude espied a little canvas on an ebony easel, draped with red plush. Excepting a rosewood tube case and box of crayons, forgotten on an article of furniture, nothing reminding one of the artistic profession could be seen lying about.
Eventually, Claude spotted a small canvas on a black easel, covered with red velvet. Aside from a rosewood tube case and a box of crayons left behind on a piece of furniture, there was nothing else in sight that hinted at the artistic profession.
‘Very finely treated,’ said Claude, wishing to be amiable, as he stood in front of the little canvas. ‘And is your picture for the Salon sent?’
‘Very nicely done,’ said Claude, trying to be friendly, as he stood in front of the small canvas. ‘Have you sent your painting to the Salon?’
‘Ah! yes, thank heavens! What a number of people I had here! A perfect procession which kept me on my legs from morning till evening during a week. I didn’t want to exhibit it, as it lowers one to do so, and Naudet also opposed it. But what would you have done? I was so begged and prayed; all the young fellows want to set me on the committee, so that I may defend them. Oh! my picture is simple enough—I call it “A Picnic.” There are a couple of gentlemen and three ladies under some trees—guests at some château, who have brought a collation with them and are eating it in a glade. You’ll see, it’s rather original.’
‘Oh! Yes, thank goodness! I had so many people here! It was like a constant stream that kept me on my feet from morning until night for a whole week. I didn’t want to show it off because it feels demeaning, and Naudet didn’t want that either. But what could I do? I was begged and pleaded with; all the young guys want to put me on the committee so I can defend them. Oh! My painting is pretty straightforward—I call it “A Picnic.” It features a couple of gentlemen and three ladies under some trees—guests at a château, who brought a spread with them and are enjoying it in a clearing. You’ll see, it’s quite original.’
He spoke in a hesitating manner, and when his eyes met those of Claude, who was looking at him fixedly, he lost countenance altogether, and joked about the little canvas on the easel.
He spoke hesitantly, and when his eyes met Claude's, who was staring at him intently, he completely lost his composure and made a joke about the small canvas on the easel.
‘That’s a daub Naudet asked me for. Oh! I’m not ignorant of what I lack—a little of what you have too much of, old man. You know that I’m still your friend; why, I defended you only yesterday with some painters.’
‘That’s a mess Naudet asked me for. Oh! I’m not unaware of what I’m missing—a bit of what you have plenty of, old man. You know I’m still your friend; in fact, I defended you just yesterday with some artists.’
He tapped Claude on the shoulders, for he had divined his old master’s secret contempt, and wished to win him back by his old-time caresses—all the wheedling practices of a hussy. Very sincerely and with a sort of anxious deference he again promised Claude that he would do everything in his power to further the hanging of his picture, ‘The Dead Child.’
He tapped Claude on the shoulders because he sensed his old master’s hidden disdain and wanted to win him back with affectionate gestures—those sweet-talking tactics of an inappropriate flirt. Very earnestly and with a hint of nervous respect, he promised Claude once more that he would do everything he could to help get his painting, ‘The Dead Child,’ hung.
However, some people arrived; more than fifteen persons came in and went off in less than an hour—fathers bringing young pupils, exhibitors anxious to say a good word on their own behalf, friends who wanted to barter influence, even women who placed their talents under the protection of their charms. And one should have seen the painter play his part as a candidate, shaking hands most lavishly, saying to one visitor: ‘Your picture this year is so pretty, it pleases me so much!’ then feigning astonishment with another: ‘What! you haven’t had a medal yet?’ and repeating to all of them: ‘Ah! If I belonged to the committee, I’d make them walk straight.’ He sent every one away delighted, closed the door behind each visitor with an air of extreme amiability, through which, however, there pierced the secret sneer of an ex-lounger on the pavement.
However, some people showed up; more than fifteen individuals came in and left in less than an hour—fathers bringing their young students, exhibitors eager to promote themselves, friends looking to trade favors, even women showcasing their talents under the guise of their charm. And one should have seen the painter play his role as a candidate, shaking hands enthusiastically, telling one guest: ‘Your painting this year is so beautiful, I really love it!’ then pretending to be astonished with another: ‘What! You haven’t received a medal yet?’ and telling all of them: ‘Ah! If I were on the committee, I’d set things straight.’ He sent everyone off happy, closed the door behind each visitor with an air of extreme friendliness, through which, however, the underlying smirk of a former street dweller peeked through.
‘You see, eh?’ he said to Claude, at a moment when they happened to be left alone. ‘What a lot of time I lose with those idiots!’
‘You see, right?’ he said to Claude, when they happened to be alone. ‘I waste so much time with those idiots!’
Then he approached the large window, and abruptly opened one of the casements; and on one of the balconies of the house over the way a woman clad in a lace dressing-gown could be distinguished waving her handkerchief. Fagerolles on his side waved his hand three times in succession. Then both windows were closed again.
Then he walked over to the big window and suddenly opened one of the sashes. Across the street, he spotted a woman in a lace dressing gown on one of the balconies, waving her handkerchief. Fagerolles waved back three times in a row. After that, both windows were closed again.
Claude had recognised Irma; and amid the silence which fell Fagerolles quietly explained matters:
Claude recognized Irma; and in the silence that followed, Fagerolles quietly explained everything:
‘It’s convenient, you see, one can correspond. We have a complete system of telegraphy. She wants to speak to me, so I must go—’
‘It’s convenient, you see, we can stay in touch. We have a fully functioning telegraph system. She wants to talk to me, so I have to go—’
Since he and Irma had resided in the avenue, they met, it was said, on their old footing. It was even asserted that he, so ‘cute,’ so well-acquainted with Parisian humbug, let himself be fleeced by her, bled at every moment of some good round sum, which she sent her maid to ask for—now to pay a tradesman, now to satisfy a whim, often for nothing at all, or rather for the sole pleasure of emptying his pockets; and this partly explained his embarrassed circumstances, his indebtedness, which ever increased despite the continuous rise in the quotations of his canvases.
Since he and Irma had been living on the avenue, they met, and people said it was just like old times. Some even claimed that he, being so clever and well-versed in Parisian nonsense, allowed her to take advantage of him, constantly draining his finances. She would send her maid to ask him for money—sometimes to pay a vendor, other times just to satisfy a whim, often for no reason at all, or rather just for the fun of emptying his pockets. This partly explained his financial troubles and growing debt, which continued to rise despite the increasing value of his paintings.
Claude had put on his hat again. Fagerolles was shuffling about impatiently, looking nervously at the house over the way.
Claude had put his hat back on. Fagerolles was pacing around anxiously, glancing nervously at the house across the street.
‘I don’t send you off, but you see she’s waiting for me,’ he said, ‘Well, it’s understood, your affair’s settled—that is, unless I’m not elected. Come to the Palais de l’Industrie on the evening the voting-papers are counted. Oh! there will be a regular crush, quite a rumpus! Still, you will always learn if you can rely on me.’
‘I’m not sending you away, but you see she’s waiting for me,’ he said, ‘Well, it’s clear, your situation is settled—that is, unless I’m not elected. Come to the Palais de l’Industrie on the night the voting papers are counted. Oh! it will be a real crowd, quite a scene! Still, you’ll always find out if you can count on me.’
At first, Claude inwardly swore that he would not trouble about it. Fagerolles’ protection weighed heavily upon him; and yet, in his heart of hearts, he really had but one fear, that the shifty fellow would not keep his promise, but would ultimately be taken with a fit of cowardice at the idea of protecting a defeated man. However, on the day of the vote Claude could not keep still, but went and roamed about the Champs Elysées under the pretence of taking a long walk. He might as well go there as elsewhere, for while waiting for the Salon he had altogether ceased work. He himself could not vote, as to do so it was necessary to have been ‘hung’ on at least one occasion. However, he repeatedly passed before the Palais de l’Industrie,* the foot pavement in front of which interested him with its bustling aspect, its procession of artist electors, whom men in dirty blouses caught hold of, shouting to them the titles of their lists of candidates—lists some thirty in number emanating from every possible coterie, and representing every possible opinion. There was the list of the studios of the School of Arts, the liberal list, the list of the uncompromising radical painters, the conciliatory list, the young painters’ list, even the ladies’ list, and so forth. The scene suggested all the turmoil at the door of an electoral polling booth on the morrow of a riot.
At first, Claude promised himself that he wouldn’t worry about it. Fagerolles' support felt like a heavy burden; yet deep down, his biggest fear was that the unreliable guy wouldn’t keep his word and would eventually back out when it came to standing up for a defeated person. However, on the day of the vote, Claude couldn’t sit still. He wandered around the Champs Elysées, pretending to take a long walk. He figured he might as well be there as anywhere else since he had completely stopped working while waiting for the Salon. He couldn’t vote himself because you needed to have been "hung" at least once to qualify. Still, he kept passing by the Palais de l’Industrie,* where the bustling sidewalk caught his attention, filled with artist voters. Men in dirty blouses grabbed them, shouting out the names of their candidate lists—about thirty in total, coming from every possible group and representing every viewpoint. There were lists from the studios of the School of Arts, a liberal list, a list from the uncompromising radical painters, a conciliatory list, a young painters' list, even a ladies' list, and many more. The scene felt like all the chaos outside a polling station the day after a riot.
* This palace, for many years the home of the ‘Salon,’ was built for the first Paris International Exhibition, that of 1855, and demolished in connection with that of 1900.—ED.
* This palace, which served as the home of the ‘Salon’ for many years, was built for the first Paris International Exhibition in 1855 and was torn down in connection with the one in 1900.—ED.
At four o’clock in the afternoon, when the voting was over, Claude could not resist a fit of curiosity to go and have a look. The staircase was now free, and whoever chose could enter. Upstairs, he came upon the huge gallery, overlooking the Champs Elysées, which was set aside for the hanging committee. A table, forty feet long, filled the centre of this gallery, and entire trees were burning in the monumental fireplace at one end of it. Some four or five hundred electors, who had remained to see the votes counted, stood there, mingled with friends and inquisitive strangers, talking, laughing, and setting quite a storm loose under the lofty ceiling. Around the table, parties of people who had volunteered to count the votes were already settled and at work; there were some fifteen of these parties in all, each comprising a chairman and two scrutineers. Three or four more remained to be organised, and nobody else offered assistance; in fact, every one turned away in fear of the crushing labour which would rivet the more zealous people to the spot far into the night.
At four o’clock in the afternoon, after the voting was done, Claude couldn’t help but be curious and went to check it out. The staircase was now clear, and anyone could go in. Upstairs, he found the large gallery overlooking the Champs Elysées, which was reserved for the hanging committee. A forty-foot long table filled the center of this gallery, and whole trees were burning in the monumental fireplace at one end. About four or five hundred voters, who stayed to watch the votes being counted, were there, mixing with friends and curious onlookers, chatting, laughing, and creating quite a buzz under the high ceiling. Around the table, groups of people who had volunteered to count the votes were already gathered and working; there were about fifteen of these groups in total, each made up of a chairperson and two scrutineers. Three or four more needed to be organized, and no one else offered to help; in fact, everyone turned away, afraid of the overwhelming task that would keep the more eager people there well into the night.
It precisely happened that Fagerolles, who had been in the thick of it since the morning, was gesticulating and shouting, trying to make himself heard above the hubbub.
It just so happened that Fagerolles, who had been in the middle of it since the morning, was waving his arms and yelling, trying to make himself heard above the noise.
‘Come, gentlemen, we need one more man here! Come, some willing person, over here!’
‘Come on, guys, we need one more person here! Anyone willing, step forward!’
And at that moment, perceiving Claude, he darted forward and forcibly dragged him off.
And at that moment, seeing Claude, he quickly rushed forward and forcibly pulled him away.
‘Ah! as for you, you will just oblige me by sitting down there and helping us! It’s for the good cause, dash it all!’
‘Ah! as for you, just do me a favor and sit down there to help us! It's for a good cause, for goodness' sake!’
Claude abruptly found himself chairman of one of the counting committees, and began to perform his functions with all the gravity of a timid man, secretly experiencing a good deal of emotion, as if the hanging of his canvas would depend upon the conscientiousness he showed in his work. He called out the names inscribed upon the voting-papers, which were passed to him in little packets, while the scrutineers, on sheets of paper prepared for the purpose, noted each successive vote that each candidate obtained. And all this went on amidst a most frightful uproar, twenty and thirty names being called out at the same time by different voices, above the continuous rumbling of the crowd. As Claude could never do anything without throwing passion into it, he waxed excited, became despondent whenever a voting-paper did not bear Fagerolles’ name, and grew happy as soon as he had to shout out that name once more. Moreover, he often tasted that delight, for his friend had made himself popular, showing himself everywhere, frequenting the cafés where influential groups of artists assembled, even venturing to expound his opinions there, and binding himself to young artists, without neglecting to bow very low to the members of the Institute. Thus there was a general current of sympathy in his favour. Fagerolles was, so to say, everybody’s spoilt child.
Claude suddenly found himself as the chairman of one of the counting committees and started carrying out his duties with all the seriousness of a shy person, secretly feeling quite emotional, as if the success of his artwork depended on how diligent he was in his role. He called out the names listed on the voting papers, which were handed to him in small bundles, while the scrutineers recorded each vote that each candidate received on prepared sheets of paper. All of this happened amid a chaotic uproar, with twenty to thirty names being shouted out simultaneously by different voices, over the constant noise of the crowd. Since Claude couldn't do anything without putting his heart into it, he grew increasingly excited, felt disheartened whenever a voting paper didn’t show Fagerolles’ name, and became happy as soon as he got to call out that name again. Moreover, he often experienced that happiness because his friend had become popular, showing up everywhere, visiting the cafés where influential groups of artists gathered, even daring to share his opinions there, and connecting with younger artists, while also making sure to show great respect to the members of the Institute. Thus, there was a general wave of support in his favor. Fagerolles was, in a way, everyone’s favorite.
Night came on at about six o’clock that rainy March day. The assistants brought lamps; and some mistrustful artists, who, gloomy and silent, were watching the counting askance, drew nearer. Others began to play jokes, imitated the cries of animals, or attempted a tyrolienne. But it was only at eight o’clock, when a collation of cold meat and wine was served, that the gaiety reached its climax. The bottles were hastily emptied, the men stuffed themselves with whatever they were lucky enough to get hold of, and there was a free-and-easy kind of Kermesse in that huge hall which the logs in the fireplace lit up with a forge-like glow. Then they all smoked, and the smoke set a kind of mist around the yellow light from the lamps, whilst on the floor trailed all the spoilt voting-papers thrown away during the polling; indeed, quite a layer of dirty paper, together with corks, breadcrumbs, and a few broken plates. The heels of those seated at the table disappeared amidst this litter. Reserve was cast aside; a little sculptor with a pale face climbed upon a chair to harangue the assembly, and a painter, with stiff moustaches under a hook nose, bestrode a chair and galloped, bowing, round the table, in mimicry of the Emperor.
Night fell around six o’clock that rainy March day. The assistants brought in lamps, and some suspicious artists, who were gloomy and silent, watched the counting from a distance and moved closer. Others started making jokes, imitating animal sounds, or trying out a tyrolienne. But it was only at eight o'clock, when a spread of cold meat and wine was served, that the mood really lifted. The bottles were quickly emptied, the men ate whatever they could grab, and there was a carefree kind of carnival atmosphere in that huge hall, illuminated by the forge-like glow of the logs in the fireplace. Then everyone started smoking, and the smoke created a mist around the yellow light of the lamps, while the floor was covered with discarded voting papers from the polling; there was indeed quite a layer of dirty paper, along with corks, breadcrumbs, and a few broken plates. The heels of those sitting at the table disappeared among this mess. Formality was tossed aside; a little sculptor with a pale face climbed onto a chair to address the crowd, and a painter with stiff moustaches and a hooked nose stood on a chair and galloped around the table, bowing in imitation of the Emperor.
Little by little, however, a good many grew tired and went off. At eleven o’clock there were not more than a couple of hundred persons present. Past midnight, however, some more people arrived, loungers in dress-coats and white ties, who had come from some theatre or soirée and wished to learn the result of the voting before all Paris knew it. Reporters also appeared; and they could be seen darting one by one out of the room as soon as a partial result was communicated to them.
Little by little, though, quite a few people got tired and left. By eleven o’clock, there were only a couple of hundred people still there. After midnight, though, a few more people showed up—those in tuxedos and white ties—who had come from a theater or a party and wanted to find out the voting results before the whole of Paris did. Reporters also showed up, and you could see them rushing out of the room one by one as soon as they received a partial result.
Claude, hoarse by now, still went on calling names. The smoke and the heat became intolerable, a smell like that of a cow-house rose from the muddy litter on the floor. One o’clock, two o’clock in the morning struck, and he was still unfolding voting-papers, the conscientiousness which he displayed delaying him to such a point that the other parties had long since finished their work, while his was still a maze of figures. At last all the additions were centralised and the definite result proclaimed. Fagerolles was elected, coming fifteenth among forty, or five places ahead of Bongrand, who had been a candidate on the same list, but whose name must have been frequently struck out. And daylight was breaking when Claude reached home in the Rue Tourlaque, feeling both worn out and delighted.
Claude, now hoarse, kept calling out names. The smoke and heat became unbearable, with a smell like a barn rising from the muddy mess on the floor. One o'clock, then two o'clock in the morning passed, and he was still opening voting papers, his attention to detail slowing him down so much that the other parties had already finished their work, while his was still a jumble of numbers. At last, all the totals were compiled and the final result announced. Fagerolles was elected, coming in fifteenth out of forty, five spots ahead of Bongrand, who had been on the same ticket but had likely been crossed off frequently. Daylight broke as Claude got home on Rue Tourlaque, feeling both exhausted and thrilled.
Then, for a couple of weeks he lived in a state of anxiety. A dozen times he had the idea of going to Fagerolles’ for information, but a feeling of shame restrained him. Besides, as the committee proceeded in alphabetical order, nothing perhaps was yet decided. However, one evening, on the Boulevard de Clichy, he felt his heart thump as he saw two broad shoulders, with whose lolloping motion he was well acquainted, coming towards him.
Then, for a couple of weeks, he was anxious. He thought about going to Fagerolles for information at least a dozen times, but shame held him back. Besides, since the committee was working in alphabetical order, nothing might have been decided yet. However, one evening on Boulevard de Clichy, his heart raced as he saw two broad shoulders, with a familiar loping walk, coming toward him.
They were the shoulders of Bongrand, who seemed embarrassed. He was the first to speak, and said:
They were Bongrand's shoulders, and he looked a bit awkward. He was the first to speak and said:
‘You know matters aren’t progressing very well over yonder with those brutes. But everything isn’t lost. Fagerolles and I are on the watch. Still, you must rely on Fagerolles; as for me, my dear fellow, I am awfully afraid of compromising your chances.’
‘You know things aren’t going very well over there with those thugs. But all is not lost. Fagerolles and I are keeping an eye on things. Still, you need to trust Fagerolles; as for me, my dear friend, I’m really scared of messing up your chances.’
To tell the truth, there was constant hostility between Bongrand and the President of the hanging committee, Mazel, a famous master of the School of Arts, and the last rampart of the elegant, buttery, conventional style of art. Although they called each other ‘dear colleague’ and made a great show of shaking hands, their hostility had burst forth the very first day; one of them could never ask for the admission of a picture without the other one voting for its rejection. Fagerolles, who had been elected secretary, had, on the contrary, made himself Mazel’s amuser, his vice, and Mazel forgave his old pupil’s defection, so skilfully did the renegade flatter him. Moreover, the young master, a regular turncoat, as his comrades said, showed even more severity than the members of the Institute towards audacious beginners. He only became lenient and sociable when he wanted to get a picture accepted, on those occasions showing himself extremely fertile in devices, intriguing and carrying the vote with all the supple deftness of a conjurer.
To be honest, there was ongoing tension between Bongrand and the President of the hanging committee, Mazel, who was a well-known master at the School of Arts and a defender of the refined, conventional style of art. Even though they addressed each other as "dear colleague" and made a big show of shaking hands, their rivalry had flared up from day one; whenever one tried to get a painting accepted, the other would always vote for its rejection. Fagerolles, who had been chosen as secretary, on the other hand, had become Mazel's entertainer, his second-in-command, and Mazel overlooked his former student’s betrayal because the turncoat flattered him so effectively. Furthermore, the young master, often called a traitor by his peers, was even stricter towards bold newcomers than the members of the Institute were. He only became easygoing and friendly when he wanted to get a piece of art accepted, at which times he cleverly devised strategies, maneuvered, and swayed the vote with the smooth skill of a magician.
The committee work was really a hard task, and even Bongrand’s strong legs grew tired of it. It was cut out every day by the assistants. An endless row of large pictures rested on the ground against the handrails, all along the first-floor galleries, right round the Palace; and every afternoon, at one o’clock precisely, the forty committee-men, headed by their president, who was equipped with a bell, started off on a promenade, until all the letters in the alphabet, serving as exhibitors’ initials, had been exhausted. They gave their decisions standing, and the work was got through as fast as possible, the worst canvases being rejected without going to the vote. At times, however, discussions delayed the party, there came a ten minutes’ quarrel, and some picture which caused a dispute was reserved for the evening revision. Two men, holding a cord some thirty feet long, kept it stretched at a distance of four paces from the line of pictures, so as to restrain the committee-men, who kept on pushing each other in the heat of their dispute, and whose stomachs, despite everything, were ever pressing against the cord. Behind the committee marched seventy museum-keepers in white blouses, executing evolutions under the orders of a brigadier. At each decision communicated to them by the secretaries, they sorted the pictures, the accepted paintings being separated from the rejected ones, which were carried off like corpses after a battle. And the round lasted during two long hours, without a moment’s respite, and without there being a single chair to sit upon. The committee-men had to remain on their legs, tramping on in a tired way amid icy draughts, which compelled even the least chilly among them to bury their noses in the depths of their fur-lined overcoats.
The committee work was a tough job, and even Bongrand’s strong legs got worn out. The assistants managed it every day. An endless row of large pictures leaned against the handrails along the first-floor galleries all around the Palace. Every afternoon, precisely at one o’clock, the forty committee members, led by their president—with a bell—set off on a walk until they went through all the letters of the alphabet used as exhibitors’ initials. They made their decisions standing up, and they got through the work as quickly as possible, with the worst paintings being rejected without a vote. However, sometimes discussions held up the group, leading to a ten-minute argument, and a painting that sparked a dispute was saved for the evening review. Two men held a cord about thirty feet long, keeping it stretched four paces from the line of pictures to keep the committee members from pushing each other in the heat of their debate, their stomachs pressing against the cord despite everything. Behind the committee marched seventy museum staff in white blouses, carrying out drills under the direction of a brigadier. Whenever the secretaries communicated a decision to them, they sorted the paintings, separating the accepted works from the rejected ones, which were taken away like corpses after a battle. The round lasted two long hours without a moment’s break, and there wasn’t a single chair to sit on. The committee members had to stay on their feet, trudging along tiredly amid icy drafts, which forced even the least chilly among them to bury their noses in their fur-lined overcoats.
Then the three o’clock snack proved very welcome: there was half an hour’s rest at a buffet, where claret, chocolate, and sandwiches could be obtained. It was there that the market of mutual concessions was held, that the bartering of influence and votes was carried on. In order that nobody might be forgotten amid the hailstorm of applications which fell upon the committee-men, most of them carried little note-books, which they consulted; and they promised to vote for certain exhibitors whom a colleague protected on condition that this colleague voted for the ones in whom they were interested. Others, however, taking no part in these intrigues, either from austerity or indifference, finished the interval in smoking a cigarette and gazing vacantly about them.
Then the three o’clock snack was very welcome: there was a half-hour break at a buffet, where you could get claret, chocolate, and sandwiches. It was here that the market of mutual concessions took place, where influence and votes were traded. To make sure no one was overlooked amid the flood of requests that came at the committee members, most of them carried small notebooks to refer to; they promised to vote for certain exhibitors that a colleague supported, on the condition that this colleague would vote for the ones they were interested in. Others, however, either due to seriousness or indifference, spent the break smoking a cigarette and staring off into space.
Then the work began again, but more agreeably, in a gallery where there were chairs, and even tables with pens and paper and ink. All the pictures whose height did not reach four feet ten inches were judged there—‘passed on the easel,’ as the expression goes—being ranged, ten or twelve together, on a kind of trestle covered with green baize. A good many committee-men then grew absent-minded, several wrote their letters, and the president had to get angry to obtain presentable majorities. Sometimes a gust of passion swept by; they all jostled each other; the votes, usually given by raising the hand, took place amid such feverish excitement that hats and walking-sticks were waved in the air above the tumultuous surging of heads.
Then the work started up again, but this time more pleasantly, in a gallery where there were chairs, tables with pens, paper, and ink. All the pictures that were shorter than four feet ten inches were reviewed there—“passed on the easel,” as the saying goes—displayed, ten or twelve at a time, on a sort of trestle covered in green felt. Many of the committee members then became distracted, some wrote their letters, and the president had to get frustrated in order to secure a respectable majority. Occasionally, a wave of passion swept through; they all bumped into each other; the votes, typically cast by raising hands, took place amid such intense excitement that hats and walking sticks were waved in the air above the chaotic crowd of heads.
And it was there, ‘on the easel,’ that ‘The Dead Child’ at last made its appearance. During the previous week Fagerolles, whose pocket-book was full of memoranda, had resorted to all kinds of complicated bartering in order to obtain votes in Claude’s favour; but it was a difficult business, it did not tally with his other engagements, and he only met with refusals as soon as he mentioned his friend’s name. He complained, moreover, that he could get no help from Bongrand, who did not carry a pocket-book, and who was so clumsy, too, that he spoilt the best causes by his outbursts of unseasonable frankness. A score of times already would Fagerolles have forsaken Claude, had it not been for his obstinate desire to try his power over his colleagues by asking for the admittance of a work by Lantier, which was a reputed impossibility. However, people should see if he wasn’t yet strong enough to force the committee into compliance with his wishes. Moreover, perhaps from the depths of his conscience there came a cry for justice, an unconfessed feeling of respect for the man whose ideas he had stolen.
And it was there, ‘on the easel,’ that ‘The Dead Child’ finally showed up. During the previous week, Fagerolles, whose notebook was full of notes, had tried all kinds of complicated bartering to gather votes for Claude; but it was tough, didn't fit with his other obligations, and he just encountered refusals as soon as he mentioned his friend's name. He also complained that he couldn’t get any support from Bongrand, who didn’t have a notebook and was so clumsy that he ruined the best cases with his unfiltered honesty. A hundred times already, Fagerolles would have abandoned Claude if not for his stubborn desire to test his influence over his peers by pushing for the acceptance of a work by Lantier, which was seen as totally impossible. Still, he wanted to show everyone that he was strong enough to make the committee give in to his demands. Moreover, maybe from the depths of his conscience, there was a cry for justice, an unacknowledged feeling of respect for the man whose ideas he had taken.
As it happened, Mazel was in a frightfully bad humour that day. At the outset of the sitting the brigadier had come to him, saying: ‘There was a mistake yesterday, Monsieur Mazel. A hors-concours* picture was rejected. You know, No. 2520, a nude woman under a tree.’
As it turned out, Mazel was in a really bad mood that day. At the beginning of the meeting, the brigadier approached him and said, "There was a mistake yesterday, Monsieur Mazel. A hors-concours* picture was rejected. You know, No. 2520, a nude woman under a tree."
* A painting by one of those artists who, from the fact that they had obtained medals at previous Salons, had the right to go on exhibiting at long as they lived, the committee being debarred from rejecting their work however bad it might be.—ED.
* A painting by one of those artists who, because they had won medals at previous Salons, could keep exhibiting for the rest of their lives, with the committee unable to reject their work no matter how bad it might be.—ED.
In fact, on the day before, this painting had been consigned to the grave amid unanimous contempt, nobody having noticed that it was the work of an old classical painter highly respected by the Institute; and the brigadier’s fright, and the amusing circumstance of a picture having thus been condemned by mistake, enlivened the younger members of the committee and made them sneer in a provoking manner.
In fact, the day before, this painting had been dismissed and ridiculed by everyone, not one person realizing it was created by a highly respected old classical painter celebrated by the Institute. The brigadier’s panic and the funny situation of a picture being wrongfully condemned amused the younger committee members and made them smirk in a teasing way.
Mazel, who detested such mishaps, which he rightly felt were disastrous for the authority of the School of Arts, made an angry gesture, and drily said:
Mazel, who hated these kinds of mistakes, which he rightly thought were terrible for the reputation of the School of Arts, made an annoyed gesture and dryly said:
‘Well, fish it out again, and put it among the admitted pictures. It isn’t so surprising, there was an intolerable noise yesterday. How can one judge anything like that at a gallop, when one can’t even obtain silence?’
‘Well, fish it out again and put it among the accepted pictures. It’s not that surprising; there was an unbearable noise yesterday. How can anyone make a judgment like that in a rush when you can’t even get some quiet?’
He rang his bell furiously, and added:
He rang his bell loudly and said:
‘Come, gentlemen, everything is ready—a little good will, if you please.’
‘Come on, guys, everything’s ready—a bit of goodwill, if you don’t mind.’
Unluckily, a fresh misfortune occurred as soon as the first paintings were set on the trestle. One canvas among others attracted Mazel’s attention, so bad did he consider it, so sharp in tone as to make one’s very teeth grate. As his sight was failing him, he leant forward to look at the signature, muttering the while: ‘Who’s the pig—’
Unluckily, a new misfortune happened as soon as the first paintings were placed on the easel. One canvas, among others, caught Mazel's attention because he thought it was so terrible, with such a harsh tone that it made his teeth ache. As his eyesight was failing him, he leaned in to check the signature, muttering, “Who’s the idiot—”
But he quickly drew himself up, quite shocked at having read the name of one of his friends, an artist who, like himself, was a rampart of healthy principles. Hoping that he had not been overheard, he thereupon called out:
But he quickly straightened up, shocked that he had read the name of one of his friends, an artist who, like him, was a strong supporter of healthy principles. Hoping he hadn't been overheard, he then called out:
‘Superb! No. 1, eh, gentlemen?’
“Awesome! Number 1, right, guys?”
No. 1 was granted—the formula of admission which entitled the picture to be hung on the line. Only, some of the committee-men laughed and nudged each other, at which Mazel felt very hurt, and became very fierce.
No. 1 was accepted—the admission criteria that allowed the painting to be displayed. However, a few of the committee members laughed and nudged each other, which upset Mazel and made him very angry.
Moreover, they all made such blunders at times. A great many of them eased their feelings at the first glance, and then recalled their words as soon as they had deciphered the signature. This ended by making them cautious, and so with furtive glances they made sure of the artist’s name before expressing any opinion. Besides, whenever a colleague’s work, some fellow committee-man’s suspicious-looking canvas, was brought forward, they took the precaution to warn each other by making signs behind the painter’s back, as if to say, ‘Take care, no mistake, mind; it’s his picture.’
Moreover, they all made mistakes from time to time. Many of them felt relief at first sight and then regretted their words as soon as they recognized the signature. This made them more careful, so they would glance around secretly to confirm the artist’s name before sharing their thoughts. Additionally, whenever a colleague’s work, or some fellow committee member’s questionable canvas, was presented, they would discreetly warn each other with gestures behind the painter’s back, as if to say, ‘Be careful, no slip-ups; it’s his piece.’
Fagerolles, despite his colleagues’ fidgety nerves, carried the day on a first occasion. It was a question of admitting a frightful portrait painted by one of his pupils, whose family, a very wealthy one, received him on a footing of intimacy. To achieve this he had taken Mazel on one side in order to try to move him with a sentimental story about an unfortunate father with three daughters, who were starving. But the president let himself be entreated for a long while, saying that a man shouldn’t waste his time painting when he was dying for lack of food, and that he ought to have a little more consideration for his three daughters! However, in the result, Mazel raised his hand, alone, with Fagerolles. Some of the others then angrily protested, and even two members of the Institute seemed disgusted, whereupon Fagerolles whispered to them in a low key:
Fagerolles, despite his colleagues' restless nerves, managed to succeed on the first try. It was about accepting a terrible painting created by one of his students, whose wealthy family welcomed him as a friend. To accomplish this, he pulled Mazel aside to try to sway him with a heartfelt story about a struggling father with three daughters who were starving. But the president hesitated for a long time, insisting that a man shouldn’t waste his time painting when he’s starving, and that he should think more about his three daughters! In the end, though, Mazel raised his hand in favor, standing alone with Fagerolles. Some of the others then angrily objected, and even two members of the Institute looked appalled, prompting Fagerolles to whisper to them quietly:
‘It’s for Mazel! He begged me to vote. The painter’s a relative of his, I think; at all events, he greatly wants the picture to be accepted.’
‘It’s for Mazel! He asked me to vote. The painter is a relative of his, I think; in any case, he really wants the picture to be accepted.’
At this the two academicians promptly raised their hands, and a large majority declared itself in favour of the portrait.
At this, the two scholars quickly raised their hands, and a large majority expressed their support for the portrait.
But all at once laughter, witticisms, and indignant cries rang out: ‘The Dead Child’ had just been placed on the trestle. Were they to have the Morgue sent to them now? said some. And while the old men drew back in alarm, the younger ones scoffed at the child’s big head, which was plainly that of a monkey who had died from trying to swallow a gourd.
But suddenly there was laughter, jokes, and angry shouts: ‘The Dead Child’ had just been put on the table. Were they really going to have the Morgue sent to them now? some said. And while the older men stepped back in shock, the younger ones mocked the child's big head, which clearly looked like that of a monkey that had died trying to swallow a gourd.
Fagerolles at once understood that the game was lost. At first he tried to spirit the vote away by a joke, in accordance with his skilful tactics:
Fagerolles immediately realized that the game was over. At first, he attempted to divert the vote with a joke, following his shrewd strategy:
‘Come, gentlemen, an old combatant—’
“Come on, gentlemen, an old fighter—”
But furious exclamations cut him short. Oh, no! not that one. They knew him, that old combatant! A madman who had been persevering in his obstinacy for fifteen years past—a proud, stuck-up fellow who posed for being a genius, and who had talked about demolishing the Salon, without even sending a picture that it was possible to accept. All their hatred of independent originality, of the competition of the ‘shop over the way,’ which frightened them, of that invincible power which triumphs even when it is seemingly defeated, resounded in their voices. No, no; away with it!
But furious outbursts interrupted him. Oh, no! Not that one. They knew him, that old fighter! A madman who had stubbornly held onto his ways for the past fifteen years—a proud, arrogant guy who pretended to be a genius and who talked about tearing down the Salon, without even submitting a piece that they could accept. All their disdain for independent creativity, for the competition from the ‘shop across the street,’ which scared them, for that unstoppable force that wins even when it seems to lose, echoed in their voices. No, no; get rid of it!
Then Fagerolles himself made the mistake of getting irritated, yielding to the anger he felt at finding what little real influence he possessed.
Then Fagerolles himself made the mistake of getting annoyed, giving in to the anger he felt at realizing how little real influence he had.
‘You are unjust; at least, be impartial,’ he said.
'You're being unfair; at the very least, try to be fair,' he said.
Thereupon the tumult reached a climax. He was surrounded and jostled, arms waved about him in threatening fashion, and angry words were shot out at him like bullets.
Thereupon, the chaos reached a peak. He was surrounded and pushed around, arms waved around him in a threatening way, and angry words were fired at him like bullets.
‘You dishonour the committee, monsieur!’
"You disrespect the committee, sir!"
‘If you defend that thing, it’s simply to get your name in the newspapers!’
'If you're defending that thing, it's just to get your name in the news!'
‘You aren’t competent to speak on the subject!’
‘You’re not qualified to talk about this!’
Then Fagerolles, beside himself, losing even the pliancy of his bantering disposition, retorted:
Then Fagerolles, totally overwhelmed, even losing his usual playful demeanor, shot back:
‘I’m as competent as you are.’
‘I’m just as capable as you are.’
‘Shut up!’ resumed a comrade, a very irascible little painter with a fair complexion. ‘You surely don’t want to make us swallow such a turnip as that?’
‘Shut up!’ said a comrade, a very short-tempered little painter with a fair complexion. ‘You can’t be serious about making us accept something as ridiculous as that?’
Yes, yes, a turnip! They all repeated the word in tones of conviction—that word which they usually cast at the very worst smudges, at the pale, cold, glairy painting of daubers.
Yes, yes, a turnip! They all echoed the word with conviction—that word they typically used for the worst smudges, for the pale, cold, slimy paintings of bad artists.
‘All right,’ at last said Fagerolles, clenching his teeth. ‘I demand the vote.’
‘All right,’ Fagerolles finally said, gritting his teeth. ‘I demand the vote.’
Since the discussion had become envenomed, Mazel had been ringing his bell, extremely flushed at finding his authority ignored.
Since the discussion had turned hostile, Mazel had been ringing his bell, very flushed at realizing his authority was being disregarded.
‘Gentlemen—come, gentlemen; it’s extraordinary that one can’t settle matters without shouting—I beg of you, gentlemen—’
‘Gentlemen—come on, gentlemen; it’s unbelievable that you can’t sort things out without yelling—I’m asking you, gentlemen—’
At last he obtained a little silence. In reality, he was not a bad-hearted man. Why should not they admit that little picture, although he himself thought it execrable? They admitted so many others!
At last, he found a bit of silence. Honestly, he wasn't a bad person. Why shouldn't they accept that little picture, even if he thought it was terrible? They accepted so many others!
‘Come, gentlemen, the vote is asked for.’
‘Come on, gentlemen, it's time to vote.’
He himself was, perhaps, about to raise his hand, when Bongrand, who had hitherto remained silent, with the blood rising to his cheeks in the anger he was trying to restrain, abruptly went off like a pop-gun, most unseasonably giving vent to the protestations of his rebellious conscience.
He himself was probably about to raise his hand when Bongrand, who had been silent until now, suddenly exploded like a pop-gun, his face flushed with the anger he was trying to control, and gave in to the protests of his rebellious conscience.
‘But, curse it all! there are not four among us capable of turning out such a piece of work!’
‘But, seriously! there aren’t four people among us who can pull off something like that!’
Some grunts sped around; but the sledge-hammer blow had come upon them with such force that nobody answered.
Some soldiers rushed around, but the powerful blow hit them with such force that no one responded.
‘Gentlemen, the vote is asked for,’ curtly repeated Mazel, who had turned pale.
‘Gentlemen, the vote is being requested,’ Mazel said again tersely, looking pale.
His tone sufficed to explain everything: it expressed all his latent hatred of Bongrand, the fierce rivalry that lay hidden under their seemingly good-natured handshakes.
His tone was enough to say it all: it revealed all his hidden hatred for Bongrand, the intense rivalry that lurked beneath their apparently friendly handshakes.
Things rarely came to such a pass as this. They almost always arranged matters. But in the depths of their ravaged pride there were wounds which always bled; they secretly waged duels which tortured them with agony, despite the smile upon their lips.
Things rarely reached a point like this. They almost always sorted things out. But deep down in their wounded pride were scars that never healed; they secretly fought battles that tormented them with pain, even as they smiled on the outside.
Bongrand and Fagerolles alone raised their hands, and ‘The Dead Child,’ being rejected, could only perhaps be rescued at the general revision.
Bongrand and Fagerolles were the only ones who raised their hands, and ‘The Dead Child,’ having been turned down, could only possibly be saved during the overall review.
This general revision was the terrible part of the task. Although, after twenty days’ continuous toil, the committee allowed itself forty-eight hours’ rest, so as to enable the keepers to prepare the final work, it could not help shuddering on the afternoon when it came upon the assemblage of three thousand rejected paintings, from among which it had to rescue as many canvases as were necessary for the then regulation total of two thousand five hundred admitted works to be complete. Ah! those three thousand pictures, placed one after the other alongside the walls of all the galleries, including the outer one, deposited also even on the floors, and lying there like stagnant pools, between which the attendants devised little paths—they were like an inundation, a deluge, which rose up, streamed over the whole Palais de l’Industrie, and submerged it beneath the murky flow of all the mediocrity and madness to be found in the river of Art. And but a single afternoon sitting was held, from one till seven o’clock—six hours of wild galloping through a maze! At first they held out against fatigue and strove to keep their vision clear; but the forced march soon made their legs give way, their eyesight was irritated by all the dancing colours, and yet it was still necessary to march on, to look and judge, even until they broke down with fatigue. By four o’clock the march was like a rout—the scattering of a defeated army. Some committee-men, out of breath, dragged themselves along very far in the rear; others, isolated, lost amid the frames, followed the narrow paths, renouncing all prospect of emerging from them, turning round and round without any hope of ever getting to the end! How could they be just and impartial, good heavens? What could they select from amid that heap of horrors? Without clearly distinguishing a landscape from a portrait, they made up the number they required in pot-luck fashion. Two hundred, two hundred and forty—another eight, they still wanted eight more. That one? No, that other. As you like! Seven, eight, it was over! At last they had got to the end, and they hobbled away, saved—free!
This overall revision was the worst part of the job. Even though, after twenty days of nonstop work, the committee gave itself forty-eight hours to rest so the keepers could prepare the final work, they couldn't help but shudder when they faced the gathering of three thousand rejected paintings. From this pile, they had to rescue enough canvases to meet the required total of two thousand five hundred accepted works. Ah! Those three thousand pictures, lined up along the walls of all the galleries, even in the outer gallery, piled on the floors, and lying there like stagnant pools, with the attendants creating narrow paths between them—they were like a flood, a deluge, that engulfed the entire Palais de l’Industrie, drowning it in the murky waters of all the mediocrity and madness found in the river of Art. And there was only a single afternoon session, from one to seven o’clock—six hours of chaotic rush through a maze! At first, they fought against fatigue and tried to keep their minds clear, but the forced pace quickly wore them down. Their legs gave out, their eyes were strained by all the flashing colors, yet they had to keep moving, looking, and judging until they collapsed from exhaustion. By four o’clock, the situation felt like a rout—the scattering of a defeated army. Some committee members, out of breath, lagged far behind; others, lost among the frames, wandered the narrow paths, giving up any hope of finding their way out, turning in circles with no chance of ever reaching the end! How could they be fair and unbiased, for goodness' sake? What could they possibly choose from that pile of horrors? Without clearly distinguishing a landscape from a portrait, they haphazardly grabbed what they needed. Two hundred, two hundred and forty—just eight more, they still needed eight more. This one? No, that one. Whatever you say! Seven, eight, done! Finally, they reached the end, limping away, saved—free!
In one gallery a fresh scene drew them once more round ‘The Dead Child,’ lying on the floor among other waifs. But this time they jested. A joker pretended to stumble and set his foot in the middle of the canvas, while others trotted along the surrounding little paths, as if trying to find out which was the picture’s top and which its bottom, and declaring that it looked much better topsy-turvy.
In one gallery, a new scene brought them back to ‘The Dead Child,’ which lay on the floor among other lost souls. But this time, they joked around. One guy pretended to trip and put his foot right in the middle of the canvas, while others wandered along the small paths surrounding it, as if trying to figure out which way was up and which was down, saying that it looked way better upside down.
Fagerolles himself also began to joke.
Fagerolles himself also started to joke.
‘Come, a little courage, gentlemen; go the round, examine it, you’ll be repaid for your trouble. Really now, gentlemen, be kind, rescue it; pray do that good action!’
‘Come on, a bit of courage, guys; take a look around, check it out, you’ll get your effort back. Seriously now, guys, be nice, save it; please do this good deed!’
They all grew merry in listening to him, but with cruel laughter they refused more harshly than ever. ‘No, no, never!’
They all felt happy listening to him, but with mocking laughter, they refused more cruelly than ever. ‘No, no, never!’
‘Will you take it for your “charity”?’ cried a comrade.
‘Will you take it for your “charity”?’ shouted a friend.
This was a custom; the committee-men had a right to a ‘charity’; each of them could select a canvas among the lot, no matter how execrable it might be, and it was thereupon admitted without examination. As a rule, the bounty of this admission was bestowed upon poor artists. The forty paintings thus rescued at the eleventh hour, were those of the beggars at the door—those whom one allowed to glide with empty stomachs to the far end of the table.
This was a tradition; the committee members had the right to a 'charity'; each of them could pick a canvas from the collection, regardless of how terrible it might be, and it was accepted without scrutiny. Generally, this opportunity was given to struggling artists. The forty paintings saved at the last moment were from the outcasts at the door—those who were allowed to slip by with empty stomachs to the far end of the table.
‘For my “charity,”’ repeated Fagerolles, feeling very much embarrassed; ‘the fact is, I meant to take another painting for my “charity.” Yes, some flowers by a lady—’
‘For my “charity,”’ repeated Fagerolles, feeling very embarrassed; ‘the truth is, I intended to choose another painting for my “charity.” Yes, some flowers by a lady—’
He was interrupted by loud jeers. Was she pretty? In front of the women’s paintings the gentlemen were particularly prone to sneer, never displaying the least gallantry. And Fagerolles remained perplexed, for the ‘lady’ in question was a person whom Irma took an interest in. He trembled at the idea of the terrible scene which would ensue should he fail to keep his promise. An expedient occurred to him.
He was interrupted by loud jeers. Was she pretty? In front of the women’s paintings, the men were especially likely to sneer, showing no hint of gallantry. Fagerolles was left confused, since the "lady" in question was someone Irma cared about. He feared the awful scene that would unfold if he didn’t keep his promise. An idea came to him.
‘Well, and you, Bongrand? You might very well take this funny little dead child for your charity.’
‘Well, what about you, Bongrand? You could totally take this strange little dead child for your charity.’
Bongrand, wounded to the heart, indignant at all the bartering, waved his long arms:
Bongrand, deeply hurt and furious about all the bargaining, waved his long arms:
‘What! I? I insult a real painter in that fashion? Let him be prouder, dash it, and never send anything to the Salon!’
‘What! I? I insult a real painter like that? Let him be more arrogant, for goodness' sake, and never submit anything to the Salon!’
Then, as the others still went on sneering, Fagerolles, desirous that victory should remain to him, made up his mind, with a proud air, like a man who is conscious of his strength and does not fear being compromised.
Then, while the others continued to sneer, Fagerolles, wanting to keep the victory for himself, decided, with a proud demeanor, like someone who knows their own strength and isn’t afraid of being put in a tough spot.
‘All right, I’ll take it for my “charity,”’ he said.
‘Okay, I’ll take it for my “charity,”’ he said.
The others shouted bravo, and gave him a bantering ovation, with a series of profound bows and numerous handshakes. All honour to the brave fellow who had the courage of his opinions! And an attendant carried away in his arms the poor derided, jolted, soiled canvas; and thus it was that a picture by the painter of ‘In the Open Air’ was at last accepted by the hanging committee of the Salon.
The others shouted “bravo” and gave him a playful round of applause with a series of deep bows and lots of handshakes. All credit to the brave guy who stood up for his beliefs! An attendant picked up the poor, mocked, bumpy, dirty canvas and took it away in his arms; and that’s how a painting by the artist of ‘In the Open Air’ finally got accepted by the hanging committee of the Salon.
On the very next morning a note from Fagerolles apprised Claude, in a couple of lines, that he had succeeded in getting ‘The Dead Child’ admitted, but that it had not been managed without trouble. Claude, despite the gladness of the tidings, felt a pang at his heart; the note was so brief, and was written in such a protecting, pitying style, that all the humiliating features of the business were apparent to him. For a moment he felt sorry over this victory, so much so that he would have liked to take his work back and hide it. Then his delicacy of feeling, his artistic pride again gave way, so much did protracted waiting for success make his wretched heart bleed. Ah! to be seen, to make his way despite everything! He had reached the point when conscience capitulates; he once more began to long for the opening of the Salon with all the feverish impatience of a beginner, again living in a state of illusion which showed him a crowd, a press of moving heads acclaiming his canvas.
On the very next morning, a note from Fagerolles informed Claude, in just a few lines, that he had managed to get ‘The Dead Child’ accepted, but it wasn’t without complications. Despite being happy about the news, Claude felt a pang in his heart; the note was so short and written in such a protective, pitying tone that all the embarrassing aspects of the situation were clear to him. For a moment, he felt regret over this victory, wishing he could take his work back and hide it. Then his sensitivity and artistic pride kicked in again, as the long wait for success made his aching heart hurt even more. Ah! To be recognized, to find his way against all odds! He had reached the point where his conscience surrendered; he once again started longing for the opening of the Salon with the anxious excitement of a newbie, envisioning a crowd, a throng of moving heads applauding his canvas.
By degrees Paris had made it the fashion to patronise ‘varnishing day’—that day formerly set aside for painters only to come and finish the toilets of their pictures. Now, however, it was like a feast of early fruit, one of those solemnities which set the city agog and attract a tremendous crowd. For a week past the newspaper press, the streets, and the public had belonged to the artists. They held Paris in their grasp; the only matters talked of were themselves, their exhibits, their sayings or doings—in fact, everything connected with them. It was one of those infatuations which at last draw bands of country folk, common soldiers, and even nursemaids to the galleries on days of gratuitous admission, in such wise that fifty thousand visitors are recorded on some fine Sundays, an entire army, all the rear battalions of the ignorant lower orders, following society, and marching, with dilated eyes, through that vast picture shop.
Gradually, Paris had turned ‘varnishing day’ into a trendy event—once a day reserved for painters to come and finish their artwork. Now, it was more like a celebration of early fruit, one of those occasions that got the whole city buzzing and drew huge crowds. For the past week, the newspapers, streets, and public attention had been all about the artists. They had Paris in their grip; the only topics of conversation were them, their exhibitions, their quotes or actions—in short, everything related to them. It was one of those obsessions that eventually lured in groups of country folks, regular soldiers, and even nannies to the galleries on free admission days, resulting in reports of fifty thousand visitors on some beautiful Sundays—an entire army, all the underprivileged following the elite, wandering with wide eyes through that massive art store.
That famous ‘varnishing day’ at first frightened Claude, who was intimidated by the thought of all the fine people whom the newspapers spoke about, and he resolved to wait for the more democratic day of the real inauguration. He even refused to accompany Sandoz. But he was consumed by such a fever, that after all he started off abruptly at eight o’clock in the morning, barely taking time to eat a bit of bread and cheese beforehand. Christine, who lacked the courage to go with him, kissed him again and again, feeling anxious and moved.
That famous "varnishing day" initially scared Claude, who felt overwhelmed by the thought of all the important people the newspapers wrote about. He decided to wait for the more casual day of the actual opening. He even declined to go with Sandoz. But he was so restless that in the end, he suddenly left at eight in the morning, hardly giving himself time to eat some bread and cheese first. Christine, who didn't have the courage to go with him, kissed him repeatedly, feeling anxious and emotional.
‘Mind, my dear, don’t worry, whatever happens,’ said she.
“Don’t worry about anything, my dear,” she said.
Claude felt somewhat oppressed as he entered the Gallery of Honour. His heart was beating fast from the swiftness with which he had climbed the grand staircase. There was a limpid May sky out of doors, and through the linen awnings, stretched under the glazed roof, there filtered a bright white light, while the open doorways, communicating with the garden gallery, admitted moist gusts of quivering freshness. For a moment Claude drew breath in that atmosphere which was already tainted with a vague smell of varnish and the odour of the musk with which the women present perfumed themselves. At a glance he took stock of the pictures on the walls: a huge massacre scene in front of him, streaming with carmine; a colossal, pallid, religious picture on his left; a Government order, the commonplace delineation of some official festivity, on the right; and then a variety of portraits, landscapes, and indoor scenes, all glaring sharply amid the fresh gilding of their frames. However, the fear which he retained of the folks usually present at this solemnity led him to direct his glances upon the gradually increasing crowd. On a circular settee in the centre of the gallery, from which sprang a sheaf of tropical foliage, there sat three ladies, three monstrously fat creatures, attired in an abominable fashion, who had settled there to indulge in a whole day’s backbiting. Behind him he heard somebody crushing harsh syllables in a hoarse voice. It was an Englishman in a check-pattern jacket, explaining the massacre scene to a yellow woman buried in the depths of a travelling ulster. There were some vacant spaces; groups of people formed, scattered, and formed again further on; all heads were raised; the men carried walking-sticks and had overcoats on their arms, the women strolled about slowly, showing distant profiles as they stopped before the pictures; and Claude’s artistic eye was caught by the flowers in their hats and bonnets, which seemed very loud in tint amid the dark waves of the men’s silk hats. He perceived three priests, two common soldiers who had found their way there no one knew whence, some endless processions of gentlemen decorated with the ribbon of the Legion of Honour, and troops of girls and their mothers, who constantly impeded the circulation. However, a good many of these people knew each other; there were smiles and bows from afar, at times a rapid handshake in passing. And conversation was carried on in a discreet tone of voice, above which rose the continuous tramping of feet.
Claude felt a bit overwhelmed as he entered the Hall of Honor. His heart raced from how quickly he had climbed the grand staircase. Outside, the sky was clear and bright, and through the linen awnings stretched beneath the glass roof, a bright white light filtered in. The open doorways leading to the garden gallery let in refreshing, moist gusts of air. For a moment, Claude took a breath in that atmosphere, which already carried a faint smell of varnish and the musk from the women around him. He quickly scanned the pictures on the walls: a massive massacre scene in front of him, drenched in crimson; a giant, pale religious painting to his left; a government commission, a dull depiction of some official celebration, to the right; and then a variety of portraits, landscapes, and indoor scenes, all sharply illuminated by the fresh gilding of their frames. However, his anxiety about the usual attendees of this event led him to focus on the growing crowd. On a circular settee in the center of the gallery, surrounded by a cluster of tropical foliage, sat three ladies—three incredibly overweight women dressed in an awful style—who had settled there to gossip all day. Behind him, he heard someone crunching harsh syllables in a rough voice. It was an Englishman in a checked jacket, explaining the massacre scene to a pale woman buried in her overcoat. There were empty spaces; groups of people formed, dispersed, and reformed elsewhere; all heads were turned up; the men carried walking sticks and had their overcoats draped over their arms, while the women walked slowly, showing distant profiles as they paused in front of the paintings. Claude's artistic eye was drawn to the loud flowers in their hats and bonnets, which stood out against the dark waves of the men’s silk hats. He spotted three priests, two common soldiers who had arrived from who knows where, endless groups of gentlemen adorned with the ribbon of the Legion of Honor, and clusters of girls and their mothers, who constantly blocked the flow of movement. Still, many of these people knew each other; there were smiles and bows from afar, occasionally a quick handshake as they passed. Conversations were held in hushed tones, with the continuous sound of footsteps echoing above.
Then Claude began to look for his own picture. He tried to find his way by means of the initial letters inscribed above the entrances of the galleries, but made a mistake, and went through those on the left hand. There was a succession of open entrances, a perspective of old tapestry door-hangings, with glimpses of the distant pictures. He went as far as the great western gallery, and came back by the parallel suite of smaller galleries without finding that allotted to the letter L. And when he reached the Gallery of Honour again, the crowd had greatly increased. In fact, it was now scarcely possible for one to move about there. Being unable to advance, he looked around, and recognised a number of painters, that nation of painters which was at home there that day, and was therefore doing the honours of its abode. Claude particularly remarked an old friend of the Boutin Studio—a young fellow consumed with the desire to advertise himself, who had been working for a medal, and who was now pouncing upon all the visitors possessed of any influence and forcibly taking them to see his pictures. Then there was a celebrated and wealthy painter who received his visitors in front of his work with a smile of triumph on his lips, showing himself compromisingly gallant with the ladies, who formed quite a court around him. And there were all the others: the rivals who execrated one another, although they shouted words of praise in full voices; the savage fellows who covertly watched their comrades’ success from the corner of a doorway; the timid ones whom one could not for an empire induce to pass through the gallery where their pictures were hung; the jokers who hid the bitter mortification of their defeat under an amusing witticism; the sincere ones who were absorbed in contemplation, trying to understand the various works, and already in fancy distributing the medals. And the painters’ families were also there. One charming young woman was accompanied by a coquettishly bedecked child; a sour-looking, skinny matron of middle-class birth was flanked by two ugly urchins in black; a fat mother had foundered on a bench amid quite a tribe of dirty brats; and a lady of mature charms, still very good-looking, stood beside her grown-up daughter, quietly watching a hussy pass—this hussy being the father’s mistress. And then there were also the models—women who pulled one another by the sleeve, who showed one another their own forms in the various pictorial nudities, talking very loudly the while and dressed without taste, spoiling their superb figures by such wretched gowns that they seemed to be hump-backed beside the well-dressed dolls—those Parisiennes who owed their figures entirely to their dressmakers.
Then Claude started to look for his own picture. He tried to navigate using the initial letters above the entrances of the galleries but made a mistake and went through those on the left. There were a series of open doorways, an expanse of old tapestry hangings, with glimpses of the paintings in the distance. He went all the way to the large western gallery and came back through the parallel set of smaller galleries without finding the one designated for the letter L. When he returned to the Gallery of Honour, the crowd had grown significantly. In fact, it was now almost impossible to move around. Unable to advance, he looked around and recognized several artists, that group of painters who were present that day and were therefore hosting their own space. Claude particularly noticed an old friend from the Boutin Studio—a young guy eager to promote himself, who had been working for a medal and was now practically dragging influential visitors to see his work. Then there was a well-known and wealthy painter who welcomed his guests in front of his artwork with a triumphant smile, charmingly flirtatious with the women who formed quite a crowd around him. And then there were all the others: rivals who despised one another but loudly praised each other; the envious ones who secretly watched their peers’ success from a doorway; the timid souls who could not be convinced to enter the gallery where their works were displayed; the jokesters who hid their bitter disappointment behind humor; the sincere ones deeply focused on understanding the various artworks, already imagining handing out medals. The painters’ families were also present. One lovely young woman was accompanied by a stylishly dressed child; a sour-looking, skinny middle-class matron was with two unattractive kids in black; a plump mother was slumped on a bench surrounded by a bunch of dirty children; and a mature lady, still quite attractive, stood beside her grown daughter, quietly watching a woman walk by—this woman being the father’s mistress. And then there were the models—women pulling at each other’s sleeves, showing off their bodies in various artistic nudities, talking loudly while dressed poorly, ruining their stunning figures with such awful clothes that they looked hunchbacked next to the well-dressed women—those Parisiennes who owed their figures entirely to their tailors.
When Claude got free of the crowd, he enfiladed the line of doorways on the right hand. His letter was on that side; but he searched the galleries marked with an L without finding anything. Perhaps his canvas had gone astray and served to fill up a vacancy elsewhere. So when he had reached the large eastern gallery, he set off along a number of other little ones, a secluded suite visited by very few people, where the pictures seemed to frown with boredom. And there again he found nothing. Bewildered, distracted, he roamed about, went on to the garden gallery, searching among the superabundant exhibits which overflowed there, pallid and shivering in the crude light; and eventually, after other distant excursions, he tumbled into the Gallery of Honour for the third time.
When Claude finally escaped the crowd, he made his way to the line of doorways on the right. His letter was on that side, but he searched the galleries labeled with an L and found nothing. It was possible his canvas had gotten lost and was being used to fill a spot somewhere else. So, when he arrived at the large eastern gallery, he headed down several smaller ones, a quiet section that hardly anyone visited, where the paintings seemed to glare with boredom. Again, he found nothing. Confused and distracted, he wandered around, moved on to the garden gallery, searching among the overflowing exhibits there, pale and shivering in the harsh light. Eventually, after exploring more remote areas, he stumbled into the Gallery of Honour for the third time.
There was now quite a crush there. All those who in any way create a stir in Paris were assembled together—the celebrities, the wealthy, the adored, talent, money and grace, the masters of romance, of the drama and of journalism, clubmen, racing men and speculators, women of every category, hussies, actresses and society belles. And Claude, angered by his vain search, grew amazed at the vulgarity of the faces thus massed together, at the incongruity of the toilets—but a few of which were elegant, while so many were common looking—at the lack of majesty which that vaunted ‘society’ displayed, to such a point, indeed, that the fear which had made him tremble was changed into contempt. Were these the people, then, who were going to jeer at his picture, provided it were found again? Two little reporters with fair complexions were completing a list of persons whose names they intended to mention. A critic pretended to take some notes on the margin of his catalogue; another was holding forth in professor’s style in the centre of a party of beginners; a third, all by himself, with his hands behind his back, seemed rooted to one spot, crushing each work beneath his august impassibility. And what especially struck Claude was the jostling flock-like behaviour of the people, their banded curiosity in which there was nothing youthful or passionate, the bitterness of their voices, the weariness to be read on their faces, their general appearance of suffering. Envy was already at work; there was the gentleman who makes himself witty with the ladies; the one who, without a word, looks, gives a terrible shrug of the shoulders, and then goes off; and there were the two who remain for a quarter of an hour leaning over the handrail, with their noses close to a little canvas, whispering very low and exchanging the knowing glances of conspirators.
There was quite a crowd there now. All the people who make waves in Paris were gathered—the celebrities, the rich, the adored, talent, money, and charm, the masters of romance, drama, and journalism, club members, horse racing enthusiasts, and investors, women of all kinds, flirts, actresses, and society darlings. Claude, frustrated by his fruitless search, was amazed by the crudeness of the faces crowded together, the mismatch in their outfits—only a few were elegant, while many looked ordinary— the lack of dignity displayed by that so-called ‘society,’ to the point where the fear that had once made him tremble turned into scorn. Were these really the people who were going to mock his painting if it were found again? Two young reporters with light complexions were finishing a list of names they planned to mention. A critic was pretending to jot down some notes on the margin of his catalogue; another was lecturing in a professor-like manner in the middle of a group of novices; a third stood alone, hands behind his back, seeming to be glued to one spot, crushing each artwork beneath his stoic indifference. What struck Claude particularly was the herding-like behavior of the crowd, their collective curiosity lacking any youthful enthusiasm or passion, the bitterness in their voices, the exhaustion evident on their faces, their overall look of distress. Jealousy was already brewing; there was the gentleman who entertains the ladies with his wit; another who silently glares, gives a dramatic shrug of his shoulders, and then walks away; and then there were the two who linger for a quarter of an hour, leaning over the handrail, their noses close to a small canvas, whispering softly and exchanging knowing looks like conspirators.
But Fagerolles had just appeared, and amid the continuous ebb and flow of the groups there seemed to be no one left but him. With his hand outstretched, he seemed to show himself everywhere at the same time, lavishly exerting himself to play the double part of a young ‘master’ and an influential member of the hanging committee. Overwhelmed with praise, thanks, and complaints, he had an answer ready for everybody without losing aught of his affability. Since early morning he had been resisting the assault of the petty painters of his set who found their pictures badly hung. It was the usual scamper of the first moment, everybody looking for everybody else, rushing to see one another and bursting into recriminations—noisy, interminable fury. Either the picture was too high up, or the light did not fall upon it properly, or the paintings near it destroyed its effect; in fact, some talked of unhooking their works and carrying them off. One tall thin fellow was especially tenacious, going from gallery to gallery in pursuit of Fagerolles, who vainly explained that he was innocent in the matter and could do nothing. Numerical order was followed, the pictures for each wall were deposited on the floor below and then hung up without anybody being favoured. He carried his obligingness so far as to promise his intervention when the galleries were rearranged after the medals had been awarded; but even then he did not manage to calm the tall thin fellow, who still continued pursuing him.
But Fagerolles had just shown up, and amidst the constant flow of groups it seemed like he was the only one left. With his hand outstretched, he appeared to be everywhere at once, energetically playing the dual role of a young 'master' and an influential member of the hanging committee. Overwhelmed with praise, thanks, and complaints, he had a response ready for everyone without losing any of his friendliness. Since early morning, he had been fending off the complaints of the struggling painters in his circle who were unhappy with how their paintings were hung. It was the usual chaos of the moment, everyone searching for one another, rushing to connect and bursting into complaints—loud, endless outrage. Either the painting was too high, the light wasn't right, or nearby artworks ruined their impact; some even talked about taking their works down and leaving. One particularly tall and thin guy was especially persistent, moving from gallery to gallery in search of Fagerolles, who futilely explained that he was not to blame and couldn’t help. They followed a numerical order, with the paintings for each wall stacked on the floor below and then hung up without anyone getting special treatment. He went so far as to promise his help when the galleries would be rearranged after the medals were handed out; but even then he couldn't manage to calm the tall thin guy, who kept on pursuing him.
Claude for a moment elbowed his way through the crowd to go and ask Fagerolles where his picture had been hung. But on seeing his friend so surrounded, pride restrained him. Was there not something absurd and painful about this constant need of another’s help? Besides, he suddenly reflected that he must have skipped a whole suite of galleries on the right-hand side; and, indeed, there were fresh leagues of painting there. He ended by reaching a gallery where a stifling crowd was massed in front of a large picture which filled the central panel of honour. At first he could not see it, there was such a surging sea of shoulders, such a thick wall of heads, such a rampart of hats. People rushed forward with gaping admiration. At length, however, by dint of rising on tiptoe, he perceived the marvel, and recognised the subject, by what had been told him.
Claude briefly pushed his way through the crowd to ask Fagerolles where his painting was displayed. But seeing his friend surrounded like that made him hold back. Wasn’t it somewhat ridiculous and painful to constantly need someone else's help? Plus, he suddenly realized he must have missed an entire series of galleries on the right side; there were indeed more paintings there. He eventually reached a gallery where a massive crowd had gathered in front of a large painting that dominated the central spot of honor. At first, he couldn’t see it at all, due to the sea of shoulders, the thick wall of heads, and the barrier of hats. People pushed forward, filled with awe. Finally, by standing on tiptoe, he caught sight of the artwork and recognized the subject from what he had been told.
It was Fagerolles’ picture. And in that ‘Picnic’ he found his own forgotten work, ‘In the Open Air,’ the same light key of colour, the same artistic formula, but softened, trickishly rendered, spoilt by skin-deep elegance, everything being ‘arranged’ with infinite skill to satisfy the low ideal of the public. Fagerolles had not made the mistake of stripping his three women; but, clad in the audacious toilets of women of society, they showed no little of their persons. As for the two gallant gentlemen in summer jackets beside them, they realised the ideal of everything most distingué; while afar off a footman was pulling a hamper off the box of a landau drawn up behind the trees. The whole of it, the figures, the drapery, the bits of still life of the repast, stood out gaily in full sunlight against the darkened foliage of the background; and the supreme skill of the painter lay in his pretended audacity, in a mendacious semblance of forcible treatment which just sufficed to send the multitude into ecstasies. It was like a storm in a cream-jug!
It was Fagerolles' painting. And in that ‘Picnic,’ he discovered his own overlooked piece, ‘In the Open Air,’ sharing the same light color palette and artistic style, but softened, cleverly rendered, and spoiled by superficial elegance, everything meticulously arranged to meet the low expectations of the public. Fagerolles had avoided the mistake of undressing his three women; instead, dressed in bold outfits typical of high society, they revealed quite a bit of their figures. As for the two dapper gentlemen in summer jackets beside them, they embodied everything that was most distingué; meanwhile, in the distance, a footman was unloading a basket from the carriage parked behind the trees. The entire scene, with the figures, the drapery, and the details of the picnic spread, stood out brightly in full sunlight against the dark foliage in the background; the painter's greatest skill was in his feigned boldness and a deceptive appearance of vigorous treatment that was just enough to send the crowd into raptures. It was like a storm in a cream jug!
Claude, being unable to approach, listened to the remarks around him. At last there was a man who depicted real truth! He did not press his points like those fools of the new school; he knew how to convey everything without showing anything. Ah! the art of knowing where to draw the line, the art of letting things be guessed, the respect due to the public, the approval of good society! And withal such delicacy, such charm and art! He did not unseasonably deliver himself of passionate things of exuberant design; no, when he had taken three notes from nature, he gave those three notes, nothing more. A newspaper man who arrived went into raptures over the ‘Picnic,’ and coined the expression ‘a very Parisian style of painting.’ It was repeated, and people no longer passed without declaring that the picture was ‘very Parisian’ indeed.
Claude, unable to join in, listened to the comments around him. Finally, there was a guy who expressed real truth! He didn't push his ideas like those fools from the new school; he knew how to communicate everything without revealing too much. Ah! the skill of knowing where to draw the line, the ability to let things be implied, the respect owed to the audience, the approval of high society! And on top of that, such finesse, such charm and skill! He didn’t inappropriately spill out passionate things with over-the-top designs; no, when he had taken three notes from nature, he shared those three notes, nothing more. A journalist who arrived went nuts over the ‘Picnic’ and coined the phrase ‘a very Parisian style of painting.’ It caught on, and people no longer walked by without declaring that the picture was ‘very Parisian’ indeed.
All those bent shoulders, all those admiring remarks rising from a sea of spines, ended by exasperating Claude; and seized with a longing to see the faces of the folk who created success, he manoeuvred in such a way as to lean his back against the handrail hard by. From that point, he had the public in front of him in the grey light filtering through the linen awning which kept the centre of the gallery in shade; whilst the brighter light, gliding from the edges of the blinds, illumined the paintings on the walls with a white flow, in which the gilding of the frames acquired a warm sunshiny tint. Claude at once recognised the people who had formerly derided him—if these were not the same, they were at least their relatives—serious, however, and enraptured, their appearance greatly improved by their respectful attention. The evil look, the weariness, which he had at first remarked on their faces, as envious bile drew their skin together and dyed it yellow, disappeared here while they enjoyed the treat of an amiable lie. Two fat ladies, open-mouthed, were yawning with satisfaction. Some old gentlemen opened their eyes wide with a knowing air. A husband explained the subject to his young wife, who jogged her chin with a pretty motion of the neck. There was every kind of marvelling, beatifical, astonished, profound, gay, austere, amidst unconscious smiles and languid postures of the head. The men threw back their black silk hats, the flowers in the women’s bonnets glided to the napes of their necks. And all the faces, after remaining motionless for a moment, were then drawn aside and replaced by others exactly like them.
All those hunched shoulders and all those admiring comments coming from a crowd of people were really annoying Claude. Eager to see the faces of those behind the success, he positioned himself to lean against the handrail nearby. From that spot, he could see the audience in front of him, with the gray light filtering through the linen awning that kept the center of the gallery shaded. Meanwhile, the brighter light streaming in from the edges of the blinds lit up the paintings on the walls with a bright glow, making the gilded frames take on a warm, sunny tint. Claude immediately recognized the people who had once mocked him—if they weren't the same ones, they were definitely their relatives—serious yet captivated, their looks greatly enhanced by their respectful attention. The unpleasant expressions and weariness he had first noticed on their faces, drawn together by envy and tinged yellow, vanished as they relished in an enjoyable falsehood. Two plump ladies, with their mouths agape, were yawning in satisfaction. Some older gentlemen widened their eyes with a knowing expression. A husband was explaining the subject to his young wife, who tilted her chin in a charming gesture. There was all kinds of wonder—blissful, astonished, deep, cheerful, and stern—amidst unintentional smiles and relaxed head positions. The men tipped back their black silk hats, and the flowers in the women’s hats slipped to the napes of their necks. And all the faces, after being still for a moment, were then shifted aside and replaced by others that looked exactly the same.
Then Claude, stupefied by that triumph, virtually forgot everything else. The gallery was becoming too small, fresh bands of people constantly accumulated inside it. There were no more vacant spaces, as there had been early in the morning; no more cool whiffs rose from the garden amid the ambient smell of varnish; the atmosphere was now becoming hot and bitter with the perfumes scattered by the women’s dresses. Before long the predominant odour suggested that of a wet dog. It must have been raining outside; one of those sudden spring showers had no doubt fallen, for the last arrivals brought moisture with them—their clothes hung about them heavily and seemed to steam as soon as they encountered the heat of the gallery. And, indeed, patches of darkness had for a moment been passing above the awning of the roof. Claude, who raised his eyes, guessed that large clouds were galloping onward lashed by the north wind, that driving rain was beating upon the glass panes. Moire-like shadows darted along the walls, all the paintings became dim, the spectators themselves were blended in obscurity until the cloud was carried away, whereupon the painter saw the heads again emerge from the twilight, ever agape with idiotic rapture.
Then Claude, amazed by that victory, pretty much forgot everything else. The gallery was getting crowded, with new groups of people constantly filling it up. There were no more empty spots like there had been early in the morning; no more cool breezes floated in from the garden amid the strong smell of paint; the atmosphere was now hot and heavy with the scents released by the women’s dresses. Soon the dominating smell resembled that of a wet dog. It must have been raining outside; one of those sudden spring showers had likely passed, as the latest arrivals brought dampness with them—their clothes clung heavily to them and seemed to steam as soon as they hit the warmth of the gallery. Indeed, dark patches had briefly moved across the awning of the roof. Claude, looking up, figured that large clouds were racing by, pushed by the north wind, and that driving rain was hitting the glass panes. Moire-like shadows flickered along the walls, all the paintings became dim, and the spectators themselves merged into the darkness until the cloud passed, after which the painter saw their heads emerge from the gloom, ever wide-eyed in foolish delight.
But there was another cup of bitterness in reserve for Claude. On the left-hand panel, facing Fagerolles’, he perceived Bongrand’s picture. And in front of that painting there was no crush whatever; the visitors walked by with an air of indifference. Yet it was Bongrand’s supreme effort, the thrust he had been trying to give for years, a last work conceived in his obstinate craving to prove the virility of his decline. The hatred he harboured against the ‘Village Wedding,’ that first masterpiece which had weighed upon all his toilsome after-life, had impelled him to select a contrasting but corresponding subject: the ‘Village Funeral’—the funeral of a young girl, with relatives and friends straggling among fields of rye and oats. Bongrand had wrestled with himself, saying that people should see if he were done for, if the experience of his sixty years were not worth all the lucky dash of his youth; and now experience was defeated, the picture was destined to be a mournful failure, like the silent fall of an old man, which does not even stay passers-by in their onward course. There were still some masterly bits, the choirboy holding the cross, the group of daughters of the Virgin carrying the bier, whose white dresses and ruddy flesh furnished a pretty contrast with the black Sunday toggery of the rustic mourners, among all the green stuff; only the priest in his alb, the girl carrying the Virgin’s banner, the family following the body, were drily handled; the whole picture, in fact, was displeasing in its very science and the obstinate stiffness of its treatment. One found in it a fatal, unconscious return to the troubled romanticism which had been the starting-point of the painter’s career. And the worst of the business was that there was justification for the indifference with which the public treated that art of another period, that cooked and somewhat dull style of painting, which no longer stopped one on one’s way, since great blazes of light had come into vogue.
But there was another dose of bitterness waiting for Claude. On the left panel, opposite Fagerolles’, he saw Bongrand’s painting. In front of that artwork, there was no crowd; visitors walked past with indifference. Yet it was Bongrand’s greatest effort, the culmination he’d been striving for years to achieve, a final piece born from his stubborn desire to show the strength of his decline. The resentment he held against the ‘Village Wedding,’ that first masterpiece that had overshadowed all his hard work afterward, pushed him to choose a contrasting yet relevant subject: the ‘Village Funeral’—the burial of a young girl, with family and friends meandering among fields of rye and oats. Bongrand had battled with himself, wanting people to see if he was truly finished, if the lessons from his sixty years were worth more than the fleeting success of his youth; and now experience had failed him, the painting was doomed to be a sorrowful failure, like the silent passing of an old man, which doesn’t even catch the attention of those walking by. There were still some masterful elements, like the choirboy holding the cross, the group of Virgin Mary's daughters carrying the coffin, whose white dresses and rosy skin created a lovely contrast with the black Sunday clothes of the rustic mourners among all the greenery; yet the priest in his alb, the girl carrying the Virgin’s banner, and the family trailing behind the body were rendered flatly. Overall, the painting was unpleasant due to its technique and the stubborn rigidity of its approach. It revealed a fatal, unconscious return to the troubled romanticism that had been the starting point of the painter’s career. And the worst part was that there was some justification for the indifference with which the public regarded that art from another era, that overcooked and somewhat uninspired style of painting, which no longer captured attention, especially since bright, vibrant art had become the trend.
It precisely happened that Bongrand entered the gallery with the hesitating step of a timid beginner, and Claude felt a pang at his heart as he saw him give a glance at his neglected picture and then another at Fagerolles’, which was bringing on a riot. At that moment the old painter must have been acutely conscious of his fall. If he had so far been devoured by the fear of slow decline, it was because he still doubted; and now he obtained sudden certainty; he was surviving his reputation, his talent was dead, he would never more give birth to living, palpitating works. He became very pale, and was about to turn and flee, when Chambouvard, the sculptor, entering the gallery by the other door, followed by his customary train of disciples, called to him without caring a fig for the people present:
It just so happened that Bongrand walked into the gallery with the hesitant step of a shy newcomer, and Claude felt a sting in his heart as he watched him glance at his neglected painting and then at Fagerolles’, which was causing a stir. In that moment, the old painter must have been painfully aware of his decline. If he had been consumed by the fear of a slow fade, it was because he still had doubts; now he had a sudden realization: he was outliving his reputation, his talent was gone, and he would never create vibrant, alive works again. He turned pale and was about to turn and run when Chambouvard, the sculptor, entered the gallery through the other door, followed by his usual group of followers, and called out to him without caring about the people present:
‘Ah! you humbug, I catch you at it—admiring yourself!’
‘Ah! you fake, I see what you're doing—admiring yourself!’
He, Chambouvard, exhibited that year an execrable ‘Reaping Woman,’ one of those stupidly spoilt figures which seemed like hoaxes on his part, so unworthy they were of his powerful hands; but he was none the less radiant, feeling certain that he had turned out yet another masterpiece, and promenading his god-like infallibility through the crowd which he did not hear laughing at him.
He, Chambouvard, showcased an awful ‘Reaping Woman’ that year, one of those ridiculously ruined figures that seemed like a joke on his part, so unworthy they were of his talent; yet, he was still beaming, convinced he had created another masterpiece, strutting around with his god-like confidence while the crowd laughed at him, oblivious to their mockery.
Bongrand did not answer, but looked at him with eyes scorched by fever.
Bongrand didn’t respond, but stared at him with eyes burning from fever.
‘And my machine downstairs?’ continued the sculptor. ‘Have you seen it? The little fellows of nowadays may try it on, but we are the only masters—we, old France!’
‘And my machine downstairs?’ the sculptor continued. ‘Have you seen it? The kids these days might give it a shot, but we're the true masters—we, old France!’
And thereupon he went off, followed by his court and bowing to the astonished public.
And with that, he left, followed by his court and bowing to the surprised crowd.
‘The brute!’ muttered Bongrand, suffocating with grief, as indignant as at the outburst of some low-bred fellow beside a deathbed.
‘The brute!’ muttered Bongrand, choking with grief, just as indignant as if some uncouth person had exploded with emotion beside a deathbed.
He perceived Claude, and approached him. Was it not cowardly to flee from this gallery? And he determined to show his courage, his lofty soul, into which envy had never entered.
He saw Claude and walked over to him. Was it not cowardly to run away from this gallery? He decided to show his courage, his noble spirit, which envy had never touched.
‘Our friend Fagerolles has a success and no mistake,’ he said. ‘I should be a hypocrite if I went into ecstasies over his picture, which I scarcely like; but he himself is really a very nice fellow indeed. Besides, you know how he exerted himself on your behalf.’
‘Our friend Fagerolles is really successful, no doubt about it,’ he said. ‘I’d be a hypocrite if I pretended to be thrilled about his painting, which I hardly like; but he’s truly a really nice guy. Plus, you know how hard he worked for you.’
Claude was trying to find a word of admiration for the ‘Village Funeral.’
Claude was looking for a word to express his admiration for the 'Village Funeral.'
‘The little cemetery in the background is so pretty!’ he said at last. ‘Is it possible that the public—’
‘The little cemetery in the background is so beautiful!’ he finally said. ‘Is it possible that the public—’
But Bongrand interrupted him in a rough voice:
But Bongrand cut him off in a harsh tone:
‘No compliments of condolence, my friend, eh? I see clear enough.’
'No condolences, my friend, huh? I get it.'
At this moment somebody nodded to them in a familiar way, and Claude recognised Naudet—a Naudet who had grown and expanded, gilded by the success of his colossal strokes of business. Ambition was turning his head; he talked about sinking all the other picture dealers; he had built himself a palace, in which he posed as the king of the market, centralising masterpieces, and there opening large art shops of the modern style. One heard a jingle of millions on the very threshold of his hall; he held exhibitions there, even ran up other galleries elsewhere; and each time that May came round, he awaited the visits of the American amateurs whom he charged fifty thousand francs for a picture which he himself had purchased for ten thousand. Moreover, he lived in princely style, with a wife and children, a mistress, a country estate in Picardy, and extensive shooting grounds. His first large profits had come from the rise in value of works left by illustrious artists, now defunct, whose talent had been denied while they lived, such as Courbet, Millet, and Rousseau; and this had ended by making him disdain any picture signed by a still struggling artist. However, ominous rumours were already in circulation. As the number of well-known pictures was limited, and the number of amateurs could barely be increased, a time seemed to be coming when business would prove very difficult. There was talk of a syndicate, of an understanding with certain bankers to keep up the present high prices; the expedient of simulated sales was resorted to at the Hôtel Drouot—pictures being bought in at a big figure by the dealer himself—and bankruptcy seemed to be at the end of all that Stock Exchange jobbery, a perfect tumble head-over-heels after all the excessive, mendacious agiotage.
At that moment, someone nodded at them in a familiar way, and Claude recognized Naudet—a Naudet who had grown and thrived, bolstered by the success of his massive business deals. Ambition was getting to his head; he talked about taking down all the other art dealers. He had built himself a mansion, where he posed as the king of the market, centralizing masterpieces and opening large modern-style art galleries. You could hear the sound of millions right at his doorstep; he held exhibitions there and even opened other galleries elsewhere. Each May, he looked forward to visits from American buyers whom he charged fifty thousand francs for a painting he had bought for ten thousand. He lived a lavish lifestyle, with a wife and kids, a mistress, a country estate in Picardy, and extensive hunting grounds. His initial large profits had come from the increasing value of works left by famous artists, now deceased, whose talent had been overlooked while they were alive, like Courbet, Millet, and Rousseau; this led him to look down on any painting signed by an artist still struggling. However, there were already troubling rumors going around. Since the number of well-known paintings was limited and the pool of buyers could hardly expand, it seemed like a time was coming when business would get really tough. There were talks of a syndicate, of an agreement with certain bankers to maintain the current high prices; they resorted to the tactic of fake sales at the Hôtel Drouot—paintings being bought at high prices by the dealer himself—and bankruptcy seemed to loom at the end of all that Stock Exchange manipulation, a complete crash after all the excessive, deceitful financial schemes.
‘Good-day, dear master,’ said Naudet, who had drawn near. ‘So you have come, like everybody else, to see my Fagerolles, eh?’
‘Good day, dear master,’ said Naudet, who had stepped closer. ‘So you’ve come, like everyone else, to see my Fagerolles, huh?’
He no longer treated Bongrand in the wheedling, respectful manner of yore. And he spoke of Fagerolles as of a painter belonging to him, of a workman to whom he paid wages, and whom he often scolded. It was he who had settled the young artist in the Avenue de Villiers, compelling him to have a little mansion of his own, furnishing it as he would have furnished a place for a hussy, running him into debt with supplies of carpets and nick-nacks, so that he might afterwards hold him at his mercy; and now he began to accuse him of lacking orderliness and seriousness, of compromising himself like a feather-brain. Take that picture, for instance, a serious painter would never have sent it to the Salon; it made a stir, no doubt, and people even talked of its obtaining the medal of honour; but nothing could have a worse effect on high prices. When a man wanted to get hold of the Yankees, he ought to know how to remain at home, like an idol in the depths of his tabernacle.
He no longer treated Bongrand in the charming, respectful way he used to. He spoke of Fagerolles as if he were a painter under his control, like a worker he paid and often scolded. He was the one who got the young artist settled in the Avenue de Villiers, forcing him to have a little house of his own, furnishing it as if it were for a mistress, running him into debt with carpets and trinkets so that he could later have power over him; and now he started to accuse him of being disorganized and frivolous, of ruining his reputation like a lightweight. Take that painting, for instance; a serious painter would never have submitted it to the Salon. It certainly caused a stir, and people even talked about it winning the medal of honor; but nothing could hurt high prices more. When a man wanted to attract the Americans, he should know how to stay home, like an idol deep in his shrine.
‘You may believe me or not, my dear fellow,’ he said to Bongrand, ‘but I would have given twenty thousand francs out of my pocket to prevent those stupid newspapers from making all this row about my Fagerolles this year.’
‘You can choose to believe me or not, my friend,’ he said to Bongrand, ‘but I would have paid twenty thousand francs out of my own pocket to stop those ridiculous newspapers from making such a fuss about my Fagerolles this year.’
Bongrand, who, despite his sufferings, was listening bravely, smiled.
Bongrand, who was listening bravely despite his struggles, smiled.
‘In point of fact,’ he said, ‘they are perhaps carrying indiscretion too far. I read an article yesterday in which I learnt that Fagerolles ate two boiled eggs every morning.’
‘Actually,’ he said, ‘they might be taking indiscretion a bit too far. I read an article yesterday where I found out that Fagerolles eats two boiled eggs every morning.’
He laughed over the coarse puffery which, after a first article on the ‘young master’s’ picture, as yet seen by nobody, had for a week past kept all Paris occupied about him. The whole fraternity of reporters had been campaigning, stripping Fagerolles to the skin, telling their readers all about his father, the artistic zinc manufacturer, his education, the house in which he resided, how he lived, even revealing the colour of his socks, and mentioning a habit he had of pinching his nose. And he was the passion of the hour, the ‘young master’ according to the tastes of the day, one who had been lucky enough to miss the Prix de Rome, and break off with the School of Arts, whose principles, however, he retained. After all, the success of that style of painting which aims merely at approximating reality, not at rendering it in all its truth, was the fortune of a season which the wind brings and blows away again, a mere whim on the part of the great lunatic city; the stir it caused was like that occasioned by some accident, which upsets the crowd in the morning and is forgotten by night amidst general indifference.
He laughed at the ridiculous hype that, after the first article about the 'young master’s' picture, which no one had seen yet, had kept all of Paris buzzing about him for the past week. Every reporter had been on a mission, digging into Fagerolles' background, sharing details about his father, the artistic zinc manufacturer, his education, the house he lived in, his lifestyle, even the color of his socks, and mentioning that he had a habit of pinching his nose. He was the hot topic of the moment, the 'young master' that fit the current trends, someone who had managed to avoid the Prix de Rome and break away from the School of Arts while still holding on to its principles. Still, the success of that style of painting, which aims merely to mimic reality rather than represent it in all its truth, was just a fleeting trend, a random fancy from the bustling city; the buzz it created was similar to the commotion caused by an accident that captures everyone's attention in the morning but is forgotten by night amid general apathy.
However, Naudet noticed the ‘Village Funeral.’
However, Naudet noticed the "Village Funeral."
‘Hullo! that’s your picture, eh?’ he said. ‘So you wanted to give a companion to the “Wedding”? Well, I should have tried to dissuade you! Ah! the “Wedding”! the “Wedding”!’
‘Hey! That’s your picture, right?’ he said. ‘So you wanted to add a companion piece to the “Wedding”? Well, I should have tried to talk you out of it! Ah! the “Wedding”! the “Wedding”!’’
Bongrand still listened to him without ceasing to smile. Barely a twinge of pain passed over his trembling lips. He forgot his masterpieces, the certainty of leaving an immortal name, he was only cognisant of the vogue which that youngster, unworthy of cleaning his palette, had so suddenly and easily acquired, that vogue which seemed to be pushing him, Bongrand, into oblivion—he who had struggled for ten years before he had succeeded in making himself known. Ah! when the new generations bury a man, if they only knew what tears of blood they make him shed in death!
Bongrand kept listening to him with a smile. A brief flicker of pain crossed his trembling lips. He forgot about his masterpieces and the certainty of leaving behind an immortal legacy; all he could think about was the popularity that this young guy, who wasn't even fit to clean his palette, had suddenly and easily gained. That popularity felt like it was pushing Bongrand into obscurity—he, who had fought for ten years to make a name for himself. Ah! If only the new generations understood the tears of blood they make someone shed in their final moments!
However, as he had remained silent, he was seized with the fear that he might have let his suffering be divined. Was he falling to the baseness of envy? Anger with himself made him raise his head—a man should die erect. And instead of giving the violent answer which was rising to his lips, he said in a familiar way:
However, since he had stayed quiet, he was struck with the fear that he might have revealed his pain. Was he giving in to the ugliness of envy? Frustration with himself caused him to lift his head—a man should die standing tall. And instead of delivering the harsh reply he wanted to say, he spoke in a casual manner:
‘You are right, Naudet, I should have done better if I had gone to bed on the day when the idea of that picture occurred to me.’
‘You’re right, Naudet, I should have done better if I’d gone to bed the day I came up with the idea for that picture.’
‘Ah! there he is; excuse me!’ cried the dealer, making off.
‘Ah! There he is; excuse me!’ shouted the dealer, rushing away.
It was Fagerolles showing himself at the entrance of the gallery. He discreetly stood there without entering, carrying his good fortune with the ease of a man who knows what he is about. Besides, he was looking for somebody; he made a sign to a young man, and gave him an answer, a favourable one, no doubt, for the other brimmed over with gratitude. Then two other persons sprang forward to congratulate him; a woman detained him, showing him, with a martyr’s gesture, a bit of still life hung in a dark corner. And finally he disappeared, after casting but one glance at the people in raptures before his picture.
It was Fagerolles standing at the entrance of the gallery. He quietly stayed there without stepping inside, carrying his good fortune with the confidence of someone who knows exactly what they're doing. Also, he was looking for someone; he signaled to a young man and gave him a response, a positive one, no doubt, because the young man was overflowing with gratitude. Then, two other people rushed forward to congratulate him; a woman held him back, showing him, with a dramatic gesture, a still life piece displayed in a dark corner. Finally, he vanished, after giving just one glance at the people who were captivated by his painting.
Claude, who had looked and listened, was overwhelmed with sadness. The crush was still increasing, he now had nought before him but faces gaping and sweating in the heat, which had become intolerable. Above the nearer shoulders rose others, and so on and so on as far as the door, whence those who could see nothing pointed out the painting to each other with the tips of their umbrellas, from which dripped the water left by the showers outside. And Bongrand remained there out of pride, erect in defeat, firmly planted on his legs, those of an old combatant, and gazing with limpid eyes upon ungrateful Paris. He wished to finish like a brave man, whose kindness of heart is boundless. Claude, who spoke to him without receiving any answer, saw very well that there was nothing behind that calm, gay face; the mind was absent, it had flown away in mourning, bleeding with frightful torture; and thereupon, full of alarm and respect, he did not insist, but went off. And Bongrand, with his vacant eyes, did not even notice his departure.
Claude, who had watched and listened, was filled with sadness. The crowd was still getting bigger, and now all he saw were faces staring and sweating in the unbearable heat. Above the closer shoulders, more faces appeared, extending all the way to the door, where those who couldn’t see anything were pointing out the painting to each other with their umbrellas, which dripped with water from the rain outside. And Bongrand stayed there out of pride, standing tall in defeat, firmly planted like an old fighter, looking with clear eyes at ungrateful Paris. He wanted to finish strong, like a brave man with an endless capacity for kindness. Claude, who spoke to him without getting a response, could see that there was nothing behind that calm, cheerful face; the mind was lost, gone away in mourning, suffering from terrible pain; filled with worry and respect, he didn’t push further and turned to leave. And Bongrand, with his vacant eyes, didn’t even notice he was gone.
A new idea had just impelled Claude onward through the crowd. He was lost in wonderment at not having been able to discover his picture. But nothing could be more simple. Was there not some gallery where people grinned, some corner full of noise and banter, some gathering of jesting spectators, insulting a picture? That picture would assuredly be his. He could still hear the laughter of the bygone Salon of the Rejected. And now at the door of each gallery he listened to ascertain if it were there that he was being hissed.
A new thought had just pushed Claude through the crowd. He was amazed that he hadn’t found his painting yet. But it was really simple. Wasn’t there a gallery where people laughed, a corner filled with chatter and jokes, a group of spectators mocking a painting? That painting would definitely be his. He could still hear the laughter from the past Salon of the Rejected. Now, at the entrance of each gallery, he listened to see if that was where he was being booed.
However, as he found himself once more in the eastern gallery, that hall where great art agonises, that depository where vast, cold, and gloomy historical and religious compositions are accumulated, he started, and remained motionless with his eyes turned upward. He had passed through that gallery twice already, and yet that was certainly his picture up yonder, so high up that he hesitated about recognising it. It looked, indeed, so little, poised like a swallow at the corner of a frame—the monumental frame of an immense painting five-and-thirty feet long, representing the Deluge, a swarming of yellow figures turning topsy-turvy in water of the hue of wine lees. On the left, moreover, there was a pitiable ashen portrait of a general; on the right a colossal nymph in a moonlit landscape, the bloodless corpse of a murdered woman rotting away on some grass; and everywhere around there were mournful violet-shaded things, mixed up with a comic scene of some bibulous monks, and an ‘Opening of the Chamber of Deputies,’ with a whole page of writing on a gilded cartouch, bearing the heads of the better-known deputies, drawn in outline, together with their names. And high up, high up, amid those livid neighbours, the little canvas, over-coarse in treatment, glared ferociously with the painful grimace of a monster.
However, as he found himself once again in the eastern gallery, that hall where great art suffers, that storage room for vast, cold, and gloomy historical and religious pieces, he stopped and stood still with his eyes looking up. He had walked through that gallery twice already, and yet there was definitely his painting up there, so high that he hesitated to recognize it. It looked so small, perched like a swallow at the corner of a frame—the monumental frame of a massive painting thirty-five feet long, depicting the Deluge, with a swarm of yellow figures flipping over in water the color of wine dregs. On the left, there was a pitiful, ashen portrait of a general; on the right, a colossal nymph in a moonlit landscape, the lifeless body of a murdered woman decaying on some grass; and all around were mournful violet-tinted things, mixed with a comical scene of some drunken monks, and an ‘Opening of the Chamber of Deputies,’ with a whole page of text on a gilded cartouche, featuring the outlines and names of the more well-known deputies. And high up, high up, among those pale neighbors, the little canvas, crudely painted, glared fiercely with the anguished grimace of a monster.
Ah! ‘The Dead Child.’ At that distance the wretched little creature was but a confused lump of flesh, the lifeless carcase of some shapeless animal. Was that swollen, whitened head a skull or a stomach? And those poor hands twisted among the bedclothes, like the bent claws of a bird killed by cold! And the bed itself, that pallidity of the sheets, below the pallidity of the limbs, all that white looking so sad, those tints fading away as if typical of the supreme end! Afterwards, however, one distinguished the light eyes staring fixedly, one recognised a child’s head, and it all seemed to suggest some disease of the brain, profoundly and frightfully pitiful.
Ah! ‘The Dead Child.’ From that distance, the poor little thing looked like just a jumbled mass of flesh, the lifeless body of some formless animal. Was that swollen, pale head a skull or a stomach? And those poor hands tangled in the bedclothes, like the twisted claws of a bird frozen to death! And the bed itself, the whiteness of the sheets, beneath the whiteness of the limbs, all that white looking so sorrowful, those colors fading as if representative of an ultimate end! Later on, though, you could distinguish the light eyes staring blankly, recognize it as a child’s head, and it all seemed to indicate some brain illness, deeply and terrifyingly tragic.
Claude approached, and then drew back to see the better. The light was so bad that refractions darted from all points across the canvas. How they had hung his little Jacques! no doubt out of disdain, or perhaps from shame, so as to get rid of the child’s lugubrious ugliness. But Claude evoked the little fellow such as he had once been, and beheld him again over yonder in the country, so fresh and pinky, as he rolled about in the grass; then in the Rue de Douai, growing pale and stupid by degrees, and then in the Rue Tourlaque, no longer able to carry his head, and dying one night, all alone, while his mother was asleep; and he beheld her also, that mother, the sad woman who had stopped at home, to weep there, no doubt, as she was now in the habit of doing for entire days. No matter, she had done right in not coming; ‘twas too mournful—their little Jacques, already cold in his bed, cast on one side like a pariah, and so brutalised by the dancing light that his face seemed to be laughing, distorted by an abominable grin.
Claude approached but then stepped back to get a better look. The light was so poor that reflections scattered from all points across the canvas. How they had displayed his little Jacques! Probably out of contempt, or maybe shame, just to rid themselves of the child’s sad ugliness. But Claude pictured the little guy as he used to be, seeing him again over there in the countryside, so fresh and rosy as he rolled around in the grass; then in Rue de Douai, gradually growing pale and dull, and later in Rue Tourlaque, no longer able to hold his head up, and dying one night, all alone, while his mother was asleep; and he also saw her, that mother, the sorrowful woman who had stayed home, likely to weep there, as she had become accustomed to doing for whole days. Still, she had done the right thing by not coming; it was too depressing— their little Jacques, already cold in his bed, lying on one side like a outcast, and so distorted by the flickering light that his face seemed to be laughing, twisted into a grotesque grin.
But Claude suffered still more from the loneliness of his work. Astonishment and disappointment made him look for the crowd, the rush which he had anticipated. Why was he not hooted? Ah! the insults of yore, the mocking, the indignation that had rent his heart, but made him live! No, nothing more, not even a passing expectoration: this was death. The visitors filed rapidly through the long gallery, seized with boredom. There were merely some people in front of the ‘Opening of the Chamber,’ where they collected to read the inscriptions, and show each other the deputies’ heads. At last, hearing some laughter behind him, he turned round; but nobody was jeering, some visitors were simply making merry over the tipsy monks, the comic success of the Salon, which some gentlemen explained to some ladies, declaring that it was brilliantly witty. And all these people passed beneath little Jacques, and not a head was raised, not a soul even knew that he was up there.
But Claude felt even more isolated in his work. Shock and disappointment made him crave the crowd and excitement he had expected. Why wasn't anyone booing him? Ah! The insults from the past, the mockery, the outrage that had torn at his heart but kept him alive! No, nothing like that anymore, not even a casual spit: this was like dying. The visitors quickly moved through the long gallery, overcome with boredom. There were just a few people gathered in front of the ‘Opening of the Chamber,’ where they stopped to read the plaques and point out the deputies’ faces to each other. Finally, hearing some laughter behind him, he turned around; but no one was mocking him; some visitors were just enjoying the antics of the drunken monks, and some gentlemen were explaining the amusing success of the Salon to some ladies, claiming it was brilliantly funny. And all these people walked underneath little Jacques, and not a single head was lifted, not one person even noticed he was up there.
However, the painter had a gleam of hope. On the central settee, two personages, one of them fat and the other thin, and both of them decorated with the Legion of Honour, sat talking, reclining against the velvet, and looking at the pictures in front of them. Claude drew near them and listened.
However, the painter had a spark of hope. On the central couch, two individuals, one plump and the other slim, both adorned with the Legion of Honour, sat chatting, leaning against the velvet, and gazing at the artwork in front of them. Claude approached them and listened.
‘And I followed them,’ said the fat fellow. ‘They went along the Rue St. Honoré, the Rue St. Roch, the Rue de la Chaussée d’Antin, the Rue la Fayette—’
‘And I followed them,’ said the chubby guy. ‘They went down Rue St. Honoré, Rue St. Roch, Rue de la Chaussée d’Antin, Rue la Fayette—’
‘And you spoke to them?’ asked the thin man, who appeared to be deeply interested.
‘And you talked to them?’ asked the thin man, who seemed really interested.
‘No, I was afraid of getting in a rage.’
‘No, I was afraid I’d lose my temper.’
Claude went off and returned on three occasions, his heart beating fast each time that some visitor stopped short and glanced slowly from the line to the ceiling. He felt an unhealthy longing to hear one word, but one. Why exhibit? How fathom public opinion? Anything rather than such torturing silence! And he almost suffocated when he saw a young married couple approach, the husband a good-looking fellow with little fair moustaches, the wife, charming, with the delicate slim figure of a shepherdess in Dresden china. She had perceived the picture, and asked what the subject was, stupefied that she could make nothing out of it; and when her husband, turning over the leaves of the catalogue, had found the title, ‘The Dead Child,’ she dragged him away, shuddering, and raising this cry of affright:
Claude left and came back three times, his heart racing each time a visitor stopped and slowly looked from the line to the ceiling. He felt a desperate need to hear just one word, any word. Why exhibit? How can you understand what the public thinks? Anything was better than this torturous silence! He nearly choked when he saw a young couple approach—the husband was attractive with a small fair mustache, and the wife was lovely, with the delicate, slender figure of a shepherdess made of Dresden china. She noticed the painting and asked what it was about, bewildered that she couldn't make sense of it; and when her husband, flipping through the catalogue, found the title, "The Dead Child," she pulled him away, shuddering, and cried out in terror:
‘Oh, the horror! The police oughtn’t to allow such horrors!’
‘Oh, the horror! The police shouldn’t allow such terrible things!’
Then Claude remained there, erect, unconscious and haunted, his eyes raised on high, amid the continuous flow of the crowd which passed on, quite indifferent, without one glance for that unique sacred thing, visible to him alone. And it was there that Sandoz came upon him, amid the jostling.
Then Claude stood there, upright, unaware and troubled, his eyes looking up, surrounded by the constant movement of the crowd that passed by, completely indifferent, without a single glance at that unique sacred thing that he alone could see. It was there that Sandoz found him, in the midst of the crowd.
The novelist, who had been strolling about alone—his wife having remained at home beside his ailing mother—had just stopped short, heart-rent, below the little canvas, which he had espied by chance. Ah! how disgusted he felt with life! He abruptly lived the days of his youth over again. He recalled the college of Plassans, his freaks with Claude on the banks of the Viorne, their long excursions under the burning sun, and all the flaming of their early ambition; and, later on, when they had lived side by side, he remembered their efforts, their certainty of coming glory, that fine irresistible, immoderate appetite that had made them talk of swallowing Paris at one bite! How many times, at that period, had he seen in Claude a great man, whose unbridled genius would leave the talent of all others far behind in the rear! First had come the studio of the Impasse des Bourdonnais; later, the studio of the Quai de Bourbon, with dreams of vast compositions, projects big enough to make the Louvre burst; and, meanwhile, the struggle was incessant; the painter laboured ten hours a day, devoting his whole being to his work. And then what? After twenty years of that passionate life he ended thus—he finished with that poor, sinister little thing, which nobody noticed, which looked so distressfully sad in its leper-like solitude! So much hope and torture, a lifetime spent in the toil of creating, to come to that, to that, good God!
The novelist, who had been walking alone—his wife staying at home with his sick mother—suddenly stopped, heartbroken, below the small canvas he had stumbled upon. Ah! how disgusted he felt with life! He unexpectedly relived his youth. He remembered the college in Plassans, his wild times with Claude by the banks of the Viorne, their long adventures in the scorching sun, and all the passion of their early dreams; and later, when they had lived side by side, he recalled their efforts, their unwavering belief in future success, that strong, insatiable urge that made them talk about conquering Paris in one go! How many times, during that time, had he seen in Claude a great man, whose boundless genius would outshine everyone else's talent! First came the studio on Impasse des Bourdonnais; then the studio on Quai de Bourbon, filled with dreams of grand works, projects big enough to make the Louvre burst; and all the while, the struggle was unrelenting; the painter worked ten hours a day, pouring his entire being into his art. And then what? After twenty years of that passionate life, he ended up like this—finishing with that poor, grim little piece, which nobody noticed, looking so heartbreakingly sad in its leper-like solitude! So much hope and pain, a lifetime spent creating, only to end up like that, good God!
Sandoz recognised Claude standing by, and fraternal emotion made his voice quake as he said to him:
Sandoz saw Claude standing nearby, and brotherly feelings made his voice tremble as he said to him:
‘What! so you came? Why did you refuse to call for me, then?’
‘What! You came? Why didn’t you call for me, then?’
The painter did not even apologise. He seemed very tired, overcome with somniferous stupor.
The painter didn't even apologize. He looked really tired, sunk in a deep, drowsy haze.
‘Well, don’t stay here,’ added Sandoz. ‘It’s past twelve o’clock, and you must lunch with me. Some people were to wait for me at Ledoyen’s; but I shall give them the go-by. Let’s go down to the buffet; we shall pick up our spirits there, eh, old fellow?’
‘Well, don’t hang around here,’ Sandoz added. ‘It’s past noon, and you should have lunch with me. Some people were supposed to wait for me at Ledoyen’s, but I’ll skip them. Let’s head down to the buffet; we’ll lift our spirits there, right, buddy?’
And then Sandoz led him away, holding his arm, pressing it, warming it, and trying to draw him from his mournful silence.
And then Sandoz guided him away, holding his arm, squeezing it, warming it, and trying to pull him out of his sorrowful silence.
‘Come, dash it all! you mustn’t give way like that. Although they have hung your picture badly, it is all the same superb, a real bit of genuine painting. Oh! I know that you dreamt of something else! But you are not dead yet, it will be for later on. And, just look, you ought to be proud, for it’s you who really triumph at the Salon this year. Fagerolles isn’t the only one who pillages you; they all imitate you now; you have revolutionised them since your “Open Air,” which they laughed so much about. Look, look! there’s an “open air” effect, and there’s another, and here and there—they all do it.’
‘Come on, don't be like that! Even though they hung your painting poorly, it's still amazing, a true piece of art. Oh! I know you were hoping for something different! But you’re not finished yet, that will come later. And just look, you should be proud, because it's you who's really shining at the Salon this year. Fagerolles isn't the only one copying you; everyone is imitating you now; you’ve totally changed the game since your “Open Air,” which they made fun of. Look, look! There's an “open air” vibe, and there's another one, and here and there—they're all doing it.’
He waved his hand towards the pictures as he and Claude passed along the galleries. In point of fact, the dash of clear light, introduced by degrees into contemporary painting, had fully burst forth at last. The dingy Salons of yore, with their pitchy canvases, had made way for a Salon full of sunshine, gay as spring itself. It was the dawn, the aurora which had first gleamed at the Salon of the Rejected, and which was now rising and rejuvenating art with a fine, diffuse light, full of infinite shades. On all sides you found Claude’s famous ‘bluey tinge,’ even in the portraits and the genre scenes, which had acquired the dimensions and the serious character of historical paintings. The old academical subjects had disappeared with the cooked juices of tradition, as if the condemned doctrine had carried its people of shadows away with it; rare were the works of pure imagination, the cadaverous nudities of mythology and catholicism, the legendary subjects painted without faith, the anecdotic bits destitute of life—in fact, all the bric-a-brac of the School of Arts used up by generations of tricksters and fools; and the influence of the new principle was evident even among those artists who lingered over the antique recipes, even among the former masters who had now grown old. The flash of sunlight had penetrated to their studios. From afar, at every step you took, you saw a painting transpierce the wall and form, as it were, a window open upon Nature. Soon the walls themselves would fall, and Nature would walk in; for the breach was a broad one, and the assault had driven routine away in that gay battle waged by audacity and youth.
He waved his hand at the pictures as he and Claude walked through the galleries. In fact, the burst of clear light that had gradually entered contemporary painting had finally exploded into full view. The dreary Salons of the past, with their dark canvases, had given way to a Salon filled with sunshine, bright as spring itself. It was the dawn, the first light that had shone in the Salon of the Rejected, now rising and refreshing art with a soft, spreading light full of endless shades. Everywhere you could see Claude's famous "bluey tinge," even in the portraits and genre scenes, which had taken on the scale and seriousness of historical paintings. The old academic subjects had vanished along with the stale traditions, as if the rejected doctrine had taken its shadows away with it; works of pure imagination were rare, the lifeless nudities of mythology and Catholicism, the legendary subjects painted without belief, the lifeless anecdotes—all the leftover junk from the School of Arts that had been exhausted by generations of con artists and fools. The influence of the new movement was clear even among those artists clinging to old techniques, even among the former masters who had now aged. The rays of sunlight had reached their studios. From a distance, at every step, you could see a painting pierce the wall and create a kind of window open to Nature. Soon, the walls themselves would come down, and Nature would come in; the opening was wide, and the push had driven out routine in that vibrant battle fought by audacity and youth.
‘Ah! your lot is a fine one, all the same, old fellow!’ continued Sandoz. ‘The art of to-morrow will be yours; you have made them all.’
‘Ah! your situation is pretty good, my friend!’ continued Sandoz. ‘The art of tomorrow will be yours; you’ve created it all.’
Claude thereupon opened his mouth, and, with an air of gloomy brutality, said in a low voice:
Claude then opened his mouth and, with a mood of grim harshness, said in a quiet voice:
‘What do I care if I have made them all, when I haven’t made myself? See here, it’s too big an affair for me, and that’s what stifles me.’
‘What do I care if I have made them all, when I haven’t made myself? See here, it’s too big an affair for me, and that’s what stifles me.’
He made a gesture to finish expressing his thought, his consciousness of his inability to prove the genius of the formula he had brought with him, the torture he felt at being merely a precursor, the one who sows the idea without reaping the glory, his grief at seeing himself pillaged, devoured by men who turned out hasty work, by a whole flight of fellows who scattered their efforts and lowered the new form of art, before he or another had found strength enough to produce the masterpiece which would make the end of the century a date in art.
He gestured to finish his thought, aware of his inability to demonstrate the brilliance of the formula he brought with him. He felt tortured as merely a forerunner, the one who plants the idea but doesn’t enjoy the recognition. He was pained to watch himself being exploited, consumed by people who rushed their work, by a group of individuals who diluted the new art form before he or anyone else had the strength to create the masterpiece that would mark the end of the century as a pivotal moment in art.
But Sandoz protested, the future lay open. Then, to divert Claude, he stopped him while crossing the Gallery of Honour and said:
But Sandoz objected, the future was wide open. Then, to distract Claude, he halted him while they were crossing the Gallery of Honour and said:
‘Just look at that lady in blue before that portrait! What a slap Nature does give to painting! You remember when we used to look at the dresses and the animation of the galleries in former times? Not a painting then withstood the shock. And yet now there are some which don’t suffer overmuch. I even noticed over there a landscape, the general yellowish tinge of which completely eclipsed all the women who approached it.’
‘Just look at that lady in blue in front of that portrait! Nature really outshines painting! Remember how we used to admire the dresses and the liveliness of the galleries in the past? No painting then could handle the competition. Yet now, some don't get overshadowed too badly. I even noticed over there a landscape, the overall yellowish tone of which totally outshone all the women who came near it.’
Claude was quivering with unutterable suffering.
Claude was shaking with unbearable pain.
‘Pray, let’s go,’ he said. ‘Take me away—I can’t stand it any longer.’
‘Please, let’s go,’ he said. ‘Take me away—I can’t take it anymore.’
They had all the trouble in the world to find a free table in the refreshment room. People were pressed together in that big, shady retreat, girt round with brown serge drapery under the girders of the lofty iron flooring of the upstairs galleries. In the background, and but partially visible in the darkness, stood three dressers displaying dishes of preserved fruit symmetrically ranged on shelves; while, nearer at hand, at counters placed on the right and left, two ladies, a dark one and a fair one, watched the crowd with a military air; and from the dim depths of this seeming cavern rose a sea of little marble tables, a tide of chairs, serried, entangled, surging, swelling, overflowing and spreading into the garden, under the broad, pallid light which fell from the glass roof.
They had a tough time finding an empty table in the refreshment room. People were crowded together in that large, shady space, surrounded by brown fabric draping beneath the high iron beams of the upstairs galleries. In the background, partially hidden in the shadows, three dressers displayed bowls of preserved fruit neatly arranged on shelves; meanwhile, closer to the front, at counters on both sides, two ladies—a dark-haired one and a light-haired one—watched the crowd with a vigilant look. From the dim corners of this almost cavernous room, a sea of small marble tables appeared, a wave of chairs, closely packed, tangled, flowing, spilling out, and extending into the garden, under the bright, pale light streaming through the glass roof.
At last Sandoz saw some people rise. He darted forward and conquered the vacant table by sheer struggling with the mob.
At last, Sandoz saw some people get up. He rushed forward and claimed the empty table by fighting through the crowd.
‘Ah! dash it! we are here at all events. What will you have to eat?’
‘Ah! darn it! we’re here after all. What do you want to eat?’
Claude made a gesture of indifference. The lunch was execrable; there was some trout softened by over-boiling, some undercut of beef dried up in the oven, some asparagus smelling of moist linen, and, in addition, one had to fight to get served; for the hustled waiters, losing their heads, remained in distress in the narrow passages which the chairs were constantly blocking. Behind the hangings on the left, one could hear a racket of saucepans and crockery; the kitchen being installed there on the sand, like one of those Kermesse cook-shops set up by the roadside in the open air.
Claude shrugged it off. The lunch was horrible; there was some trout that had become mushy from overcooking, some beef that was dried out in the oven, some asparagus that smelled like damp linen, and on top of that, you had to struggle to get served. The frantic waiters, losing their focus, were stuck in the cramped spaces that the chairs were constantly blocking. Behind the curtains on the left, you could hear a clattering of pots and dishes; the kitchen was set up there on the sand, like one of those food stalls at a fair set up by the roadside in the open air.
Sandoz and Claude had to eat, seated obliquely and half strangled between two parties of people whose elbows almost ended by getting into their plates; and each time that a waiter passed he gave their chairs a shake with his hips. However, the inconvenience, like the abominable cookery, made one gay. People jested about the dishes, different tables fraternised together, common misfortune brought about a kind of pleasure party. Strangers ended by sympathising; friends kept up conversations, although they were seated three rows distant from one another, and were obliged to turn their heads and gesticulate over their neighbours’ shoulders. The women particularly became animated, at first rather anxious as to the crush, and then ungloving their hands, catching up their skirts, and laughing at the first thimbleful of neat wine they drank.
Sandoz and Claude had to eat, seated at an angle and feeling cramped between two groups of people whose elbows almost ended up in their plates; and every time a waiter passed by, he would bump their chairs with his hips. However, the discomfort, along with the terrible food, made everyone cheerful. People joked about the dishes, different tables bonded, and shared misfortune created a sort of party atmosphere. Strangers eventually sympathized with one another; friends maintained conversations even though they were seated three rows apart, having to turn their heads and gesture over their neighbors' shoulders. The women, in particular, became lively, initially a bit anxious about the crowded space, but then removing their gloves, lifting their skirts, and laughing after their first sip of strong wine.
However, Sandoz, who had renounced finishing his meat, raised his voice amid the terrible hubbub caused by the chatter and the serving:
However, Sandoz, who had given up on finishing his meat, raised his voice above the noisy chaos from the chatter and the serving:
‘A bit of cheese, eh? And let’s try to get some coffee.’
‘A little cheese, huh? And let's grab some coffee.’
Claude, whose eyes looked dreamy, did not hear. He was gazing into the garden. From his seat he could see the central clump of verdure, some lofty palms which stood in relief against the grey hangings with which the garden was decorated all round. A circle of statues was set out there; and you could see the back of a faun; the profile of a young girl with full cheeks; the face of a bronze Gaul, a colossal bit of romanticism which irritated one by its stupid assumption of patriotism; the trunk of a woman hanging by the wrists, some Andromeda of the Place Pigalle; and others, and others still following the bends of the pathways; rows of shoulders and hips, heads, breasts, legs, and arms, all mingling and growing indistinct in the distance. On the left stretched a line of busts—such delightful ones—furnishing a most comical and uncommon suite of noses. There was the huge pointed nose of a priest, the tip-tilted nose of a soubrette, the handsome classical nose of a fifteenth-century Italian woman, the mere fancy nose of a sailor—in fact, every kind of nose, both the magistrate’s and the manufacturer’s, and the nose of the gentleman decorated with the Legion of Honour—all of them motionless and ranged in endless succession!
Claude, whose eyes looked dreamy, didn't hear. He was staring into the garden. From his seat, he could see the central cluster of greenery, some tall palms standing out against the grey drapes that adorned the garden all around. A circle of statues was arranged there; you could see the back of a faun, the profile of a young girl with full cheeks, the face of a bronze Gaul, a huge piece of romanticism that annoyed you with its silly display of patriotism; the trunk of a woman hanging by her wrists, some Andromeda from the Place Pigalle; and others, with more still following the curves of the pathways; rows of shoulders and hips, heads, breasts, legs, and arms, all blending together and becoming unclear in the distance. To the left was a line of busts—such delightful ones—creating a really funny and unusual collection of noses. There was the big pointed nose of a priest, the upturned nose of a soubrette, the beautiful classical nose of a fifteenth-century Italian woman, the quirky nose of a sailor—in fact, every kind of nose, from the magistrate's to the manufacturer's, and even the nose of the gentleman decorated with the Legion of Honour—all of them still and arranged in endless order!
However, Claude saw nothing of them; to him they were but grey spots in the hazy, greenish light. His stupor still lasted, and he was only conscious of one thing, the luxuriousness of the women’s dresses, of which he had formed a wrong estimate amid the pushing in the galleries, and which were here freely displayed, as if the wearers had been promenading over the gravel in the conservatory of some château. All the elegance of Paris passed by, the women who had come to show themselves, in dresses thoughtfully combined and destined to be described in the morrow’s newspapers. People stared a great deal at an actress, who walked about with a queen-like tread, on the arm of a gentleman who assumed the complacent airs of a prince consort. The women of society looked like so many hussies, and they all of them took stock of one another with that slow glance which estimates the value of silk and the length of lace, and which ferrets everywhere, from the tips of boots to the feathers upon bonnets. This was neutral ground, so to say; some ladies who were seated had drawn their chairs together, after the fashion in the garden of the Tuileries, and occupied themselves exclusively with criticising those of their own sex who passed by. Two female friends quickened their pace, laughing. Another woman, all alone, walked up and down, mute, with a black look in her eyes. Some others, who had lost one another, met again, and began ejaculating about the adventure. And, meantime, the dark moving mass of men came to a standstill, then set off again till it stopped short before a bit of marble, or eddied back to a bit of bronze. And among the mere bourgeois, who were few in number, though all of them looked out of their element there, moved men with celebrated names—all the illustrations of Paris. A name of resounding glory re-echoed as a fat, ill-clad gentleman passed by; the winged name of a poet followed as a pale man with a flat, common face approached. A living wave was rising from this crowd in the even, colourless light when suddenly a flash of sunshine, from behind the clouds of a final shower, set the glass panes on high aflame, making the stained window on the western side resplendent, and raining down in golden particles through the still atmosphere; and then everything became warm—the snowy statues amid the shiny green stuff, the soft lawns parted by the yellow sand of the pathways, the rich dresses with their glossy satin and bright beads, even the very voices, whose hilarious murmur seemed to crackle like a bright fire of vine shoots. Some gardeners, completing the arrangements of the flower-beds, turned on the taps of the stand-pipes and promenaded about with their pots, the showers squirting from which came forth again in tepid steam from the drenched grass. And meanwhile a plucky sparrow, who had descended from the iron girders, despite the number of people, dipped his beak in the sand in front of the buffet, eating some crumbs which a young woman threw him by way of amusement. Of all the tumult, however, Claude only heard the ocean-like din afar, the rumbling of the people rolling onwards in the galleries. And a recollection came to him, he remembered that noise which had burst forth like a hurricane in front of his picture at the Salon of the Rejected. But nowadays people no longer laughed at him; upstairs the giant roar of Paris was acclaiming Fagerolles!
However, Claude saw none of them; to him they were just dull spots in the hazy, greenish light. His daze still lingered, and he was only aware of one thing: the lavishness of the women's dresses, which he had misjudged during the hustle in the galleries, and which were now on full display, as if the wearers were strolling through the gravel of some château's conservatory. All the elegance of Paris passed by, with women who had come to show off, in outfits carefully put together and meant to be noted in the next day’s newspapers. People were particularly focused on an actress walking with a regal gait, on the arm of a gentleman who carried himself like a proud prince consort. The socialites looked rather cheap, and they all sized each other up with that slow gaze that assesses the quality of silk and the length of lace, scrutinizing every detail from the tips of boots to the feathers on hats. This was neutral territory, so to speak; some seated ladies had gathered their chairs together, like in the garden of the Tuileries, and were solely focused on critiquing the women who passed by. Two female friends quickened their pace, laughing. Another woman, all alone, wandered back and forth silently, with a dark expression in her eyes. Others, who had lost track of one another, reunited and began chattering about their experiences. Meanwhile, the dense crowd of men came to a halt, then set off again until they stopped in front of a piece of marble, or swirled back to admire a bit of bronze. Among the few bourgeois present, who all looked out of place, moved men with famous names—all the highlights of Paris. A name of great renown echoed as a chubby, poorly dressed gentleman passed by; the celebrated name of a poet swept by with a pale man who had a plain, unremarkable face. An energetic wave surged from this crowd in the even, colorless light when suddenly a burst of sunshine, breaking through the clouds of a recent rain, set the glass panes ablaze, illuminating the stained window on the west side, showering down golden particles through the still air; and then everything felt warm—the white statues amid the shiny greenery, the soft lawns bordered by the yellow sand of the paths, the rich dresses with their shiny satin and bright beads, even the voices, whose lively murmur seemed to crackle like a bright fire of vine shoots. Some gardeners, finalizing the flower beds, turned on the hoses and strolled around with their watering cans, from which warm steam rose again from the soaked grass. Meanwhile, a bold sparrow, who had ventured down from the iron beams, despite the crowd, dipped its beak in the sand in front of the buffet, pecking at crumbs a young woman tossed him for fun. Yet amid all the chaos, Claude only heard the distant ocean-like roar, the rumble of people rolling onward in the galleries. A memory struck him; he recalled that noise which had exploded like a hurricane in front of his painting at the Salon of the Rejected. But nowadays, people no longer mocked him; upstairs, the deafening roar of Paris was cheering for Fagerolles!
It so happened that Sandoz, who had turned round, said to Claude: ‘Hallo! there’s Fagerolles!’
It just so happened that Sandoz, who had turned around, said to Claude: ‘Hey! There’s Fagerolles!’
And, indeed, Fagerolles and Jory had just laid hands on a table near by without noticing their friends, and the journalist, continuing in his gruff voice a conversation which had previously begun, remarked:
And, in fact, Fagerolles and Jory had just grabbed a nearby table without noticing their friends, and the journalist, keeping his gruff tone, continued a conversation they had started earlier, saying:
‘Yes, I saw his “Dead Child”! Ah! the poor devil! what an ending!’
'Yeah, I saw his "Dead Child"! Ah! the poor guy! what a tragic ending!'
But Fagerolles nudged Jory, and the latter, having caught sight of his two old comrades, immediately added:
But Fagerolles nudged Jory, and Jory, spotting his two old friends, quickly added:
‘Ah! that dear old Claude! How goes it, eh? You know that I haven’t yet seen your picture. But I’m told that it’s superb.’
‘Ah! that dear old Claude! How’s it going, huh? You know I still haven’t seen your painting. But I’ve heard it’s amazing.’
‘Superb!’ declared Fagerolles, who then began to express his surprise. ‘So you lunched here. What an idea! Everything is so awfully bad. We two have just come from Ledoyen’s. Oh! such a crowd and such hustling, such mirth! Bring your table nearer and let us chat a bit.’
‘Fantastic!’ said Fagerolles, who then started to share his surprise. ‘So you had lunch here. What a concept! Everything is really terrible. We just came from Ledoyen’s. Oh! so many people and so much excitement, such joy! Bring your table closer and let’s talk for a while.’
They joined the two tables together. But flatterers and petitioners were already after the triumphant young master. Three friends rose up and noisily saluted him from afar. A lady became smilingly contemplative when her husband had whispered his name in her ear. And the tall, thin fellow, the artist whose picture had been badly hung, and who had pursued him since the morning, as enraged as ever, left a table where he was seated at the further end of the buffet, and again hurried forward to complain, imperatively demanding ‘the line’ at once.
They pushed the two tables together. But sycophants and people with requests were already crowding around the victorious young master. Three friends stood up and loudly greeted him from a distance. A woman smiled thoughtfully when her husband whispered his name in her ear. And the tall, skinny guy, the artist whose painting had been hung poorly and who had been chasing him since morning, as furious as ever, got up from a table at the far end of the buffet and hurried over to complain, demanding 'the line' right away.
‘Oh! go to the deuce!’ at last cried Fagerolles, his patience and amiability exhausted. And he added, when the other had gone off, mumbling some indistinct threats: ‘It’s true; a fellow does all he can to be obliging, but those chaps would drive one mad! All of them on the “line”! leagues of “line” then! Ah! what a business it is to be a committee-man! One wears out one’s legs, and one only reaps hatred as reward.’
‘Oh! go to hell!’ Fagerolles finally shouted, completely fed up and losing his temper. After the other person walked away, muttering some vague threats, he added, ‘It’s true; a guy tries his best to be helpful, but those people will drive you crazy! They’re all on the “line”! miles of “line” too! Ah! what a hassle it is to be on the committee! You wear yourself out, and all you get back is hatred as a reward.’
Claude, who was looking at him with his oppressed air, seemed to wake up for a moment, and murmured:
Claude, who was looking at him with a heavy expression, seemed to snap out of it for a moment and murmured:
‘I wrote to you; I wanted to go and see you to thank you. Bongrand told me about all the trouble you had. So thanks again.’
‘I wrote to you; I wanted to come see you to thank you. Bongrand told me about all the trouble you went through. So thanks again.’
But Fagerolles hastily broke in:
But Fagerolles quickly interrupted:
‘Tut, tut! I certainly owed that much to our old friendship. It’s I who am delighted to have given you any pleasure.’
‘Tut, tut! I definitely owed that much to our old friendship. I’m the one who is happy to have given you any pleasure.’
He showed the embarrassment which always came upon him in presence of the acknowledged master of his youth, that kind of humility which filled him perforce when he was with the man whose mute disdain, even at this moment, sufficed to spoil all his triumph.
He demonstrated the embarrassment that always hit him when he was around the acknowledged master of his youth, that kind of humility that filled him against his will when he was with the man whose silent contempt, even now, was enough to ruin all his success.
‘Your picture is very good,’ slowly added Claude, who wished to be kind-hearted and generous.
‘Your picture is really good,’ Claude said slowly, wanting to be kind and generous.
This simple praise made Fagerolles’ heart swell with exaggerated, irresistible emotion, springing he knew not whence; and this rascal, who believed in nothing, who was usually so proficient in humbug, answered in a shaky voice:
This simple compliment filled Fagerolles’ heart with overwhelming, irresistible emotion that he couldn't explain; and this guy, who believed in nothing and was usually so good at deception, replied in a shaky voice:
‘Ah! my dear fellow, ah! it’s very kind of you to tell me that!’
‘Ah! my dear friend, ah! it’s really nice of you to say that!’
Sandoz had at last obtained two cups of coffee, and as the waiter had forgotten to bring any sugar, he had to content himself with some pieces which a party had left on an adjoining table. A few tables, indeed, had now become vacant, but the general freedom had increased, and one woman’s laughter rang out so loudly that every head turned round. The men were smoking, and a bluish cloud slowly rose above the straggling tablecloths, stained by wine and littered with dirty plates and dishes. When Fagerolles, on his aide, succeeded in obtaining two glasses of chartreuse for himself and Jory, he began to talk to Sandoz, whom he treated with a certain amount of deference, divining that the novelist might become a power. And Jory thereupon appropriated Claude, who had again become mournful and silent.
Sandoz finally got two cups of coffee, but since the waiter forgot to bring sugar, he had to make do with some pieces left on a nearby table. A few tables had opened up, but the overall atmosphere had become more relaxed, and one woman's laughter rang out so loudly that everyone turned to look. The men were smoking, and a bluish cloud slowly rose above the tablecloths, which were stained with wine and cluttered with dirty plates and dishes. When Fagerolles managed to get two glasses of chartreuse for himself and Jory, he started talking to Sandoz, treating him with a bit of respect, sensing that the novelist could become influential. Meanwhile, Jory latched onto Claude, who had again become gloomy and quiet.
‘You know, my dear fellow,’ said the journalist, ‘I didn’t send you any announcement of my marriage. On account of our position we managed it on the quiet without inviting any guests. All the same, I should have liked to let you know. You will excuse me, won’t you?’
‘You know, my dear friend,’ said the journalist, ‘I didn’t send you any announcement about my wedding. Given our situation, we kept it low-key without inviting anyone. Still, I would have liked to inform you. You’ll forgive me, right?’
He showed himself expansive, gave particulars, full of the happiness of life, and egotistically delighted to feel fat and victorious in front of that poor vanquished fellow. He succeeded with everything, he said. He had given up leader-writing, feeling the necessity of settling down seriously, and he had risen to the editorship of a prominent art review, on which, so it was asserted, he made thirty thousand francs a year, without mentioning certain profits realised by shady trafficking in the sale of art collections. The middle-class rapacity which he had inherited from his mother, the hereditary passion for profit which had secretly impelled him to embark in petty speculations as soon as he had gained a few coppers, now openly displayed itself, and ended by making him a terrible customer, who bled all the artists and amateurs who came under his clutches.
He was very open, shared details, and was full of the joy of life, feeling selfishly pleased to be successful and thriving in front of that poor defeated guy. He claimed to have succeeded in everything. He stopped writing for the leader, feeling the need to settle down seriously, and had become the editor of a well-known art magazine, where he reportedly made thirty thousand francs a year, not counting some shady profits from selling art collections. The middle-class greed he inherited from his mother, along with his deep-seated passion for making money, which had driven him to start small investments as soon as he had some cash, now showed itself openly and turned him into a terrible customer, draining the resources of all the artists and collectors who fell into his grasp.
It was amidst this good luck of his that Mathilde, now all-powerful, had brought him to the point of begging her, with tears in his eyes, to become his wife, a request which she had proudly refused during six long months.
It was during this fortunate time for him that Mathilde, now fully in control, had brought him to the point of begging her, with tears in his eyes, to marry him, a request that she had proudly turned down for six long months.
‘When folks are destined to live together,’ he continued, ‘the best course is to set everything square. You experienced it yourself, my dear fellow; you know something about it, eh? And if I told you that she wouldn’t consent at first—yes, it’s a fact—for fear of being misjudged and of doing me harm. Oh! she has such grandeur, such delicacy of mind! No, nobody can have an idea of that woman’s qualities. Devoted, taking all possible care of one, economical, and acute, too, and such a good adviser! Ah! it was a lucky chance that I met her! I no longer do anything without consulting her; I let her do as she likes; she manages everything, upon my word.’
‘When people are meant to live together,’ he went on, ‘the best thing to do is to set everything straight. You’ve experienced it yourself, my friend; you know a bit about it, right? And if I told you that she didn’t agree at first—yes, that’s true—out of worry about being misunderstood and possibly hurting me. Oh! she has such presence, such a delicate mindset! No one can truly grasp the qualities of that woman. She’s devoted, takes incredible care of you, is frugal, sharp, and such a great advisor! Ah! it was a fortunate moment when I met her! I don’t do anything without asking for her opinion; I let her take charge; she handles everything, I swear.’
The truth was that Mathilde had finished by reducing him to the frightened obedience of a little boy. The once dissolute she-ghoul had become a dictatorial spouse, eager for respect, and consumed with ambition and love of money. She showed, too, every form of sourish virtue. It was said that they had been seen taking the Holy Communion together at Notre Dame de Lorette. They kissed one another before other people, and called each other by endearing nicknames. Only, of an evening, he had to relate how he had spent his time during the day, and if the employment of a single hour remained suspicious, if he did not bring home all the money he had received, down to the odd coppers, she led him the most abominable life imaginable.
The truth was that Mathilde had turned him into a scared little boy who obeyed her. The once wild woman had become a controlling wife, hungry for respect and obsessed with ambition and money. She also displayed every kind of bitter virtue. People said they had been seen taking Communion together at Notre Dame de Lorette. They kissed each other in public and used affectionate nicknames. But every evening, he had to explain how he had spent his day, and if even a single hour seemed questionable, or if he didn't bring home all the money he had earned, down to the last coins, she made his life utterly miserable.
This, of course, Jory left unmentioned. By way of conclusion he exclaimed: ‘And so we waited for my father’s death, and then I married her.’
This, of course, Jory didn't bring up. To wrap things up, he said: ‘And so we waited for my father to die, and then I married her.’
Claude, whose mind had so far been wandering, and who had merely nodded without listening, was struck by that last sentence.
Claude, whose mind had been wandering up to that point and who had just nodded without really listening, was hit by that last sentence.
‘What! you married her—married Mathilde?’
"Wait! You married her—married Mathilde?"
That exclamation summed up all the astonishment that the affair caused him, all the recollections that occurred to him of Mahoudeau’s shop. That Jory, why, he could still hear him talking about Mathilde in an abominable manner; and yet he had married her! It was really stupid for a fellow to speak badly of a woman, for he never knew if he might not end by marrying her some day or other!
That exclamation captured all the shock the situation brought him, all the memories that came to mind about Mahoudeau’s shop. That Jory, he could still hear him talking horribly about Mathilde; and yet he had married her! It was really foolish for a guy to speak poorly of a woman, since he never knew if he might end up marrying her someday!
However, Jory was perfectly serene, his memory was dead, he never allowed himself an allusion to the past, never showed the slightest embarrassment when his comrades’ eyes were turned on him. Besides, Mathilde seemed to be a new-comer. He introduced her to them as if they knew nothing whatever about her.
However, Jory was completely calm, his memory was gone, he never let himself hint at the past, and he never showed the slightest awkwardness when his friends looked at him. Besides, Mathilde seemed like a newcomer. He introduced her to them as if they didn’t know anything about her at all.
Sandoz, who had lent an ear to the conversation, greatly interested by this fine business, called out as soon as Jory and Claude became silent:
Sandoz, who had been listening to the conversation, very intrigued by this interesting situation, called out as soon as Jory and Claude stopped talking:
‘Let’s be off, eh? My legs are getting numbed.’
'Let's go, okay? My legs are going numb.'
But at that moment Irma Bécot appeared, and stopped in front of the buffet. With her hair freshly gilded, she had put on her best looks—all the tricky sheen of a tawny hussy, who seemed to have just stepped out of some old Renaissance frame; and she wore a train of light blue brocaded silk, with a satin skirt covered with Alençon lace, of such richness that quite an escort of gentlemen followed her in admiration. On perceiving Claude among the others, she hesitated for a moment, seized, as it were, with cowardly shame in front of that ill-clad, ugly, derided devil. Then, becoming valiant, as it were, it was his hand that she shook the first amid all those well-dressed men, who opened their eyes in amazement. She laughed with an affectionate air, and spoke to him in a friendly, bantering way.
But at that moment, Irma Bécot appeared and stopped in front of the buffet. With her hair freshly styled, she had put on her best look—all the flashy charm of a bold woman who seemed to have just stepped out of an old Renaissance painting; she wore a flowing light blue brocaded silk gown, with a satin skirt topped with Alençon lace, so luxurious that a group of admirers followed her. When she spotted Claude among the crowd, she hesitated for a moment, struck by a surge of shame in front of that poorly dressed, unattractive, ridiculed man. But then, gathering her courage, she was the first to shake his hand among all those well-dressed men, who looked on in surprise. She laughed in a warm-hearted way and chatted with him in a friendly, teasing manner.
Fagerolles, however, was already paying for the two chartreuses he had ordered, and at last he went off with Irma, whom Jory also decided to follow. Claude watched them walk away together, she between the two men, moving on in regal fashion, greatly admired, and repeatedly bowed to by people in the crowd.
Fagerolles, however, was already paying for the two chartreuses he had ordered, and finally, he left with Irma, whom Jory also decided to follow. Claude watched them walk away together, her between the two men, moving on in a regal manner, greatly admired, and repeatedly bowed to by people in the crowd.
‘One can see very well that Mathilde isn’t here,’ quietly remarked Sandoz. ‘Ah! my friend, what clouts Jory would receive on getting home!’
‘You can clearly see that Mathilde isn’t here,’ Sandoz said quietly. ‘Ah! my friend, what trouble Jory would be in when he gets home!’
The novelist now asked for the bill. All the tables were becoming vacant; there only remained a litter of bones and crusts. A couple of waiters were wiping the marble slabs with sponges, whilst a third raked up the soiled sand. Behind the brown serge hangings the staff of the establishment was lunching—one could hear a grinding of jaws and husky laughter, a rumpus akin to that of a camp of gipsies devouring the contents of their saucepans.
The novelist now asked for the check. All the tables were becoming empty; only a mess of bones and scraps remained. A couple of waiters were cleaning the marble tops with sponges, while a third was sweeping up the dirty sand. Behind the brown fabric drapes, the staff of the place was having lunch—one could hear the sound of chewing and rough laughter, a commotion similar to that of a group of travelers devouring the food from their pots.
Claude and Sandoz went round the garden, where they discovered a statue by Mahoudeau, very badly placed in a corner near the eastern vestibule. It was the bathing girl at last, standing erect, but of diminutive proportions, being scarcely as tall as a girl ten years old, but charmingly delicate—with slim hips and a tiny bosom, displaying all the exquisite hesitancy of a sprouting bud. The figure seemed to exhale a perfume, that grace which nothing can give, but which flowers where it lists, stubborn, invincible, perennial grace, springing still and ever from Mahoudeau’s thick fingers, which were so ignorant of their special aptitude that they had long treated this very grace with derision.
Claude and Sandoz walked around the garden, where they found a statue by Mahoudeau, awkwardly positioned in a corner near the eastern vestibule. It was the bathing girl at last, standing upright but quite small, barely the height of a ten-year-old girl, yet charmingly delicate—with slim hips and a tiny bust, showcasing all the exquisite uncertainty of a budding flower. The figure seemed to radiate a fragrance, that grace which cannot be given, but blooms wherever it chooses, stubborn, unyielding, everlasting grace, still arising from Mahoudeau’s thick hands, which were so unaware of their special talent that they had long mocked this very grace.
Sandoz could not help smiling.
Sandoz couldn't help but smile.
‘And to think that this fellow has done everything he could to warp his talent. If his figure were better placed, it would meet with great success.’
‘And to think that this guy has done everything he can to undermine his talent. If his figure were better positioned, it would achieve great success.’
‘Yes, great success,’ repeated Claude. ‘It is very pretty.’
‘Yes, great success,’ Claude said again. ‘It’s really nice.’
Precisely at that moment they perceived Mahoudeau, already in the vestibule, and going towards the staircase. They called him, ran after him, and then all three remained talking together for a few minutes. The ground-floor gallery stretched away, empty, with its sanded pavement, and the pale light streaming through its large round windows. One might have fancied oneself under a railway bridge. Strong pillars supported the metallic framework, and an icy chillness blew from above, moistening the sand in which one’s feet sank. In the distance, behind a torn curtain, one could see rows of statues, the rejected sculptural exhibits, the casts which poor sculptors did not even remove, gathered together in a livid kind of Morgue, in a state of lamentable abandonment. But what surprised one, on raising one’s head, was the continuous din, the mighty tramp of the public over the flooring of the upper galleries. One was deafened by it; it rolled on without a pause, as if interminable trains, going at full speed, were ever and ever shaking the iron girders.
At that moment, they noticed Mahoudeau, already in the hallway, heading towards the staircase. They called out to him and ran after him, and the three of them talked together for a few minutes. The ground-floor hallway stretched out, empty, with its sandy floor and the dim light streaming through its large round windows. It felt a bit like being under a railway bridge. Strong pillars supported the metal framework, and a chilly breeze blew down from above, dampening the sand beneath their feet. In the distance, behind a torn curtain, rows of statues could be seen—discarded sculptural pieces, the casts that poor sculptors didn’t even bother to remove, gathered together in a ghostly sort of morgue, left in a state of sad neglect. But what was surprising, when one looked up, was the constant noise—the heavy footsteps of people moving over the floor of the upper galleries. It was deafening; the sound rolled on without stopping, as if endless trains, racing at full speed, were continuously shaking the iron beams.
When Mahoudeau had been complimented, he told Claude that he had searched for his picture in vain. In the depths of what hole could they have put it? Then, in a fit of affectionate remembrance for the past, he asked anxiously after Gagnière and Dubuche. Where were the Salons of yore which they had all reached in a band, the mad excursions through the galleries as in an enemy’s country, the violent disdain they had felt on going away, the discussions which had made their tongues swell and emptied their brains? Nobody now saw Dubuche. Two or three times a month Gagnière came from Melun, in a state of bewilderment, to attend some concert; and he now took such little interest in painting that he had not even looked in at the Salon, although he exhibited his usual landscape, the same view of the banks of the Seine which he had been sending for the last fifteen years—a picture of a pretty greyish tint, so conscientious and quiet that the public had never remarked it.
When Mahoudeau was complimented, he told Claude that he had searched in vain for his painting. Where could they have hidden it? Then, in a moment of nostalgic feeling for the past, he asked anxiously about Gagnière and Dubuche. Where were the Salons of old that they had all explored together, the crazy adventures through the galleries like they were in enemy territory, the intense disdain they felt when leaving, the discussions that made their tongues swell and drained their minds? Nobody saw Dubuche anymore. A couple of times a month, Gagnière would come from Melun, confused, to attend some concert; he had now lost so much interest in painting that he hadn’t even stopped by the Salon, even though he showcased his usual landscape, the same view of the banks of the Seine he had been sending for the last fifteen years—a painting with a nice greyish tone, so careful and understated that the public never noticed it.
‘I was going upstairs,’ resumed Mahoudeau. ‘Will you come with me?’
‘I was heading upstairs,’ Mahoudeau continued. ‘Will you join me?’
Claude, pale with suffering, raised his eyes every second. Ah! that terrible rumbling, that devouring gallop of the monster overhead, the shock of which he felt in his very limbs!
Claude, pale with pain, looked up every moment. Ah! that terrible rumble, that destructive rush of the beast above, the shock of which he felt in his very bones!
He held out his hand without speaking.
He extended his hand without saying a word.
‘What! are you going to leave us?’ exclaimed Sandoz. Take just another turn with us, and we’ll go away together.’
‘What! Are you really going to leave us?’ Sandoz exclaimed. ‘Just take one more turn with us, and we’ll leave together.’
Then, on seeing Claude so weary, a feeling of pity made his heart contract. He divined that the poor fellow’s courage was exhausted, that he was desirous of solitude, seized with a desire to fly off alone and hide his wound.
Then, seeing Claude so exhausted, a wave of pity made his heart ache. He realized that the poor guy’s strength was spent, that he wanted to be alone, driven by a need to escape and hide his pain.
‘Then, good-bye, old man: I’ll call and see you to-morrow.’
‘Then, goodbye, old man: I’ll call and see you tomorrow.’
Staggering, and as if pursued by the tempest upstairs, Claude disappeared behind the clumps of shrubbery in the garden. But two hours later Sandoz, who after losing Mahoudeau had just found him again with Jory and Fagerolles, perceived the unhappy painter again standing in front of his picture, at the same spot where he had met him the first time. At the moment of going off the wretched fellow had come up there again, harassed and attracted despite himself.
Staggering, and as if chased by the storm upstairs, Claude vanished behind the bushes in the garden. But two hours later, Sandoz, who had just reunited with Mahoudeau after losing him, spotted the troubled painter once more standing in front of his painting, in the same place where he had first encountered him. Just as he was about to leave, the poor guy had come back there again, worn out yet drawn to it despite himself.
There was now the usual five o’clock crush. The crowd, weary of winding round the galleries, became distracted, and pushed and shoved without ever finding its way out. Since the coolness of the morning, the heat of all the human bodies, the odour of all the breath exhaled there had made the atmosphere heavy, and the dust of the floors, flying about, rose up in a fine mist. People still took each other to see certain pictures, the subjects of which alone struck and attracted the crowd. Some went off, came back, and walked about unceasingly. The women were particularly obstinate in not retiring; they seemed determined to remain there till the attendants should push them out when six o’clock began to strike. Some fat ladies had foundered. Others, who had failed to find even the tiniest place to sit down, leaned heavily on their parasols, sinking, but still obstinate. Every eye was turned anxiously and supplicatingly towards the settees laden with people. And all that those thousands of sight-seers were now conscious of, was that last fatigue of theirs, which made their legs totter, drew their features together, and tortured them with headache—that headache peculiar to fine-art shows, which is caused by the constant straining of one’s neck and the blinding dance of colours.
There was the usual rush at five o'clock. The crowd, tired of circling the galleries, got distracted and pushed and shoved without ever finding a way out. Since the cool morning, the heat from all the bodies and the smell of everyone's breath made the air heavy, and the dust on the floors swirled up in a fine mist. People still took each other to see certain paintings that attracted the crowd solely based on their subjects. Some people left, came back, and kept wandering. The women were particularly stubborn about not leaving; they seemed determined to stay until the staff finally pushed them out when the clock struck six. Some heavier ladies had given up. Others, who couldn't find even a little spot to sit, leaned hard on their parasols, sinking but still refusing to give in. Every eye was anxiously but pleadingly directed at the benches filled with people. And all those thousands of visitors were aware of only their last fatigue, which made their legs weak, contorted their faces, and tormented them with a headache—the kind that comes from art shows, caused by constantly straining their necks and the overwhelming explosion of colors.
Alone on the little settee where at noon already they had been talking about their private affairs, the two decorated gentlemen were still chatting quietly, with their minds a hundred leagues away from the place. Perhaps they had returned thither, perhaps they had not even stirred from the spot.
Alone on the small couch where they had already been discussing their personal matters at noon, the two distinguished gentlemen were still talking softly, their thoughts a hundred miles away from the setting. Maybe they had gone back there, or maybe they hadn't even moved from the spot.
‘And so,’ said the fat one, ‘you went in, pretending not to understand?’
‘So,’ said the overweight guy, ‘you went in, acting like you didn’t understand?’
‘Quite so,’ replied the thin one. ‘I looked at them and took off my hat. It was clear, eh?’
‘Exactly,’ replied the thin one. ‘I looked at them and took off my hat. It was obvious, right?’
‘Astonishing! You really astonish me, my dear friend.’
‘Wow! You really amaze me, my dear friend.’
Claude, however, only heard the low beating of his heart, and only beheld the ‘Dead Child’ up there in the air, near the ceiling. He did not take his eyes off it, a prey to a fascination which held him there, quite independent of his will. The crowd turned round him, people’s feet trod on his own, he was pushed and carried away; and, like some inert object, he abandoned himself, waved about, and ultimately found himself again on the same spot as before without having once lowered his head, quite ignorant of what was occurring below, all his life being concentrated up yonder beside his work, his little Jacques, swollen in death. Two big tears which stood motionless between his eyelids prevented him from seeing clearly. And it seemed to him as if he would never have time to see enough.
Claude, however, only heard the faint pounding of his heart and only saw the ‘Dead Child’ up there in the air, near the ceiling. He couldn't take his eyes off it, caught in a fascination that held him there, completely beyond his control. The crowd swirled around him, people stepped on his feet, he was pushed and carried away; and, like some lifeless object, he surrendered, tossed around, and eventually found himself back at the same spot as before without having once looked down, utterly unaware of what was happening below, his entire life focused up there beside his work, his little Jacques, bloated in death. Two large tears that sat still between his eyelids blurred his vision. And it felt as if he would never have enough time to take it all in.
Then Sandoz, in his deep compassion, pretended he did not perceive his old friend; it was as if he wished to leave him there, beside the tomb of his wrecked life. Their comrades once more went past in a band. Fagerolles and Jory darted on ahead, and, Mahoudeau having asked Sandoz where Claude’s picture was hung, the novelist told a lie, drew him aside and took him off. All of them went away.
Then Sandoz, feeling a deep sense of compassion, acted as if he didn’t see his old friend; it seemed like he wanted to leave him there, next to the grave of his ruined life. Their companions passed by in a group once again. Fagerolles and Jory rushed ahead, and after Mahoudeau asked Sandoz where Claude’s painting was displayed, the novelist lied, pulled him aside, and took him away. They all left.
In the evening Christine only managed to draw curt words from Claude; everything was going on all right, said he; the public showed no ill-humour; the picture had a good effect, though it was hung perhaps rather high up. However, despite this semblance of cold tranquillity, he seemed so strange that she became frightened.
In the evening, Christine could only get short answers from Claude; everything was going fine, he said; the audience was in a good mood; the painting had a positive impact, even if it was hung a bit too high. Yet, despite this appearance of calm, he seemed so off that it scared her.
After dinner, as she returned from carrying the dirty plates into the kitchen, she no longer found him near the table. He had opened a window which overlooked some waste ground, and he stood there, leaning out to such a degree that she could scarcely see him. At this she sprang forward, terrified, and pulled him violently by his jacket.
After dinner, when she came back from taking the dirty plates to the kitchen, she didn't see him by the table anymore. He had opened a window that looked out over some deserted land and was leaning out so far that she could hardly see him. Panicking, she rushed over and yanked him back by his jacket.
‘Claude! Claude! what are you doing?’
‘Claude! Claude! What are you doing?’
He turned round, with his face as white as a sheet and his eyes haggard.
He turned around, with his face as pale as a ghost and his eyes tired.
‘I’m looking,’ he said.
"I'm searching," he said.
But she closed the window with trembling hands, and after that significant incident such anguish clung to her that she no longer slept at night-time.
But she closed the window with shaking hands, and after that important event, such pain stayed with her that she could no longer sleep at night.
XI
CLAUDE set to work again on the very next day, and months elapsed, indeed the whole summer went by, in heavy quietude. He had found a job, some little paintings of flowers for England, the proceeds of which sufficed for their daily bread. All his available time was again devoted to his large canvas, and he no longer went into the same fits of anger over it, but seemed to resign himself to that eternal task, evincing obstinate, hopeless industry. However, his eyes retained their crazy expression—one could see the death of light, as it were, in them, when they gazed upon the failure of his existence.
CLAUDE got back to work the very next day, and months passed; in fact, the entire summer went by in a heavy stillness. He had found a job doing small flower paintings for England, and the money from those was enough to cover their daily expenses. He devoted all his free time to his large canvas, and he no longer had the same outbursts of anger about it but seemed to accept that endless task, showing stubborn, hopeless dedication. However, his eyes still had that wild look—one could see the light fading from them when they reflected on the failure of his life.
About this period Sandoz also experienced great grief. His mother died, his whole life was upset—that life of three together, so homely in its character, and shared merely by a few friends. He began to hate the pavilion of the Rue Nollet, and, moreover, success suddenly declared itself with respect to his books, which hitherto had sold but moderately well. So, prompted by the advent of comparative wealth, he rented in the Rue de Londres a spacious flat, the arrangements of which occupied him and his wife for several months. Sandoz’s grief had drawn him closer to Claude again, both being disgusted with everything. After the terrible blow of the Salon, the novelist had felt very anxious about his old chum, divining that something had irreparably snapped within him, that there was some wound by which life ebbed away unseen. Then, however, finding Claude so cold and quiet, he ended by growing somewhat reassured.
About this time, Sandoz also went through a lot of pain. His mother passed away, completely disrupting his life—a life shared with just a few friends that felt so cozy. He started to dislike the place on Rue Nollet, and on top of that, his books finally began to do well, after previously selling just okay. So, encouraged by this newfound financial stability, he rented a spacious apartment on Rue de Londres, which he and his wife spent several months arranging. Sandoz’s grief had brought him and Claude closer again, as they both felt fed up with everything. After the harsh blow of the Salon, the novelist had worried deeply about his old friend, sensing that something had broken irreparably inside him, that there was some invisible wound draining his life away. However, as he found Claude to be so distant and calm, he eventually began to feel a little more reassured.
Sandoz often walked up to the Rue Tourlaque, and whenever he found only Christine at home, he questioned her, realising that she also lived in apprehension of a calamity of which she never spoke. Her face bore a look of worry, and now and again she started nervously, like a mother who watches over her child and trembles at the slightest sound, with the fear that death may be entering the chamber.
Sandoz often walked up to Rue Tourlaque, and whenever he found only Christine at home, he would ask her questions, knowing that she too lived in fear of a disaster she never mentioned. Her face showed signs of worry, and every now and then she would flinch nervously, like a mother keeping watch over her child, trembling at the faintest noise, scared that death might be entering the room.
One July morning Sandoz asked her: ‘Well, are you pleased? Claude’s quiet, he works a deal.’
One July morning, Sandoz asked her, "So, are you happy? Claude’s quiet, and he’s making a deal."
She gave the large picture her usual glance, a side glance full of terror and hatred.
She gave the big picture her usual look, a sideways glance filled with fear and hatred.
‘Yes, yes, he works,’ she said. ‘He wants to finish everything else before taking up the woman again.’ And without confessing the fear that harassed her, she added in a lower tone: ‘But his eyes—have you noticed his eyes? They always have the same wild expression. I know very well that he lies, despite his pretence of taking things so easily. Pray, come and see him, and take him out with you, so as to change the current of his thoughts. He only has you left; help me, do help me!’
‘Yes, yes, he’s working,’ she said. ‘He wants to wrap up everything else before getting back to the woman.’ And without admitting the fear that troubled her, she added in a softer voice: ‘But his eyes—have you noticed his eyes? They always have the same wild look. I know for sure that he’s lying, despite his act of playing it cool. Please, come and see him, and take him out with you to help shift his mindset. You’re all he has left; I’m begging you, please help me!’
After that Sandoz diligently devised motives for various walks, arriving at Claude’s early in the morning, and carrying him away from his work perforce. It was almost always necessary to drag him from his steps, on which he habitually sat, even when he was not painting. A feeling of weariness stopped him, a kind of torpor benumbed him for long minutes, during which he did not give a single stroke with the brush. In those moments of mute contemplation, his gaze reverted with pious fervour to the woman’s figure which he no longer touched: it was like a hesitating desire combined with sacred awe, a passion which he refused to satisfy, as he felt certain that it would cost him his life. When he set to work again at the other figures and the background of the picture, he well knew that the woman’s figure was still there, and his glance wavered whenever he espied it; he felt that he would only remain master of himself as long as he did not touch it again.
After that, Sandoz diligently created reasons for various outings, showing up at Claude’s early in the morning and forcing him away from his work. It was almost always necessary to pull him away from his easel, where he often sat, even when he wasn’t painting. A feeling of exhaustion would stop him; a kind of lethargy would numb him for long minutes, during which he wouldn’t make a single brushstroke. In those moments of silent contemplation, his gaze would return with reverent intensity to the woman's figure that he no longer painted: it was like a hesitant desire mixed with sacred awe, a passion he refused to act on, as he was sure it would cost him his life. When he returned to work on the other figures and the background of the painting, he knew that the woman’s figure was still there, and his glance would falter whenever he caught sight of it; he felt he could only remain in control as long as he didn’t attempt to paint it again.
One evening, Christine, who now visited at Sandoz’s and never missed a single Thursday there, in the hope of seeing her big sick child of an artist brighten up in the society of his friends, took the novelist aside and begged him to drop in at their place on the morrow. And on the next day Sandoz, who, as it happened, wanted to take some notes for a novel, on the other side of Montmartre, went in search of Claude, carried him off and kept him idling about until night-time.
One evening, Christine, who regularly visited Sandoz’s and never missed a single Thursday there, hoping to see her sick artist son cheer up in the company of his friends, pulled the novelist aside and asked him to come by their place the next day. The following day, Sandoz, who happened to need to take some notes for a novel on the other side of Montmartre, went to find Claude, took him along, and kept him hanging out until nighttime.
On this occasion they went as far as the gate of Clignancourt, where a perpetual fair was held, with merry-go-rounds, shooting-galleries, and taverns, and on reaching the spot they were stupefied to find themselves face to face with Chaîne, who was enthroned in a large and stylish booth. It was a kind of chapel, highly ornamented. There were four circular revolving stands set in a row and loaded with articles in china and glass, all sorts of ornaments and nick-nacks, whose gilding and polish shone amid an harmonica-like tinkling whenever the hand of a gamester set the stand in motion. It then spun round, grating against a feather, which, on the rotatory movement ceasing, indicated what article, if any, had been won. The big prize was a live rabbit, adorned with pink favours, which waltzed and revolved unceasingly, intoxicated with fright. And all this display was set in red hangings, scalloped at the top; and between the curtains one saw three pictures hanging at the rear of the booth, as in the sanctuary of some tabernacle. They were Chaîne’s three masterpieces, which now followed him from fair to fair, from one end of Paris to the other. The ‘Woman taken in Adultery’ in the centre, the copy of the Mantegna on the left, and Mahoudeau’s stove on the right. Of an evening, when the petroleum lamps flamed and the revolving stands glowed and radiated like planets, nothing seemed finer than those pictures hanging amid the blood-tinged purple of the hangings, and a gaping crowd often flocked to view them.
On this occasion, they went all the way to the gate of Clignancourt, where a never-ending fair was taking place, complete with merry-go-rounds, shooting galleries, and taverns. When they arrived, they were shocked to find themselves face to face with Chaîne, who was seated in a large and stylish booth. It looked like a chapel, richly decorated. There were four circular revolving stands arranged in a row, filled with china and glass items, all sorts of ornaments and knick-knacks, their gold and shine twinkling like the sound of a harmonica whenever a player set the stand in motion. It would spin around, rubbing against a feather that indicated which item, if any, had been won once it stopped spinning. The big prize was a live rabbit, dressed with pink ribbons, that danced and spun continuously, scared out of its wits. This entire display was surrounded by red fabric, scalloped at the top; between the curtains, there were three paintings hanging at the back of the booth, like in the sanctuary of a tabernacle. These were Chaîne’s three masterpieces that he took from one fair to another, all across Paris. In the center was 'The Woman Taken in Adultery,' a copy of the Mantegna on the left, and Mahoudeau’s stove on the right. In the evenings, when the oil lamps flickered and the revolving stands glowed like planets, nothing looked more beautiful than those paintings hanging against the blood-red purple of the drapery, and a curious crowd would often gather to admire them.
The sight was such that it wrung an exclamation from Claude: ‘Ah, good heavens! But those paintings look very well—they were surely intended for this.’
The scene was incredible enough to make Claude exclaim, “Ah, good heavens! Those paintings look amazing—they were definitely meant for this.”
The Mantegna, so naively harsh in treatment, looked like some faded coloured print nailed there for the delectation of simple-minded folk; whilst the minutely painted stove, all awry, hanging beside the gingerbread Christ absolving the adulterous woman, assumed an unexpectedly gay aspect.
The Mantegna, so unrefined in its execution, resembled a worn-out colored print tacked up for the enjoyment of simple-minded people; while the intricately painted stove, slightly crooked, hanging next to the gingerbread Christ forgiving the adulterous woman, took on an unexpectedly cheerful appearance.
However, Chaîne, who had just perceived the two friends, held out his hand to them, as if he had left them merely the day before. He was calm, neither proud nor ashamed of his booth, and he had not aged, having still a leathery aspect; though, on the other hand, his nose had completely vanished between his cheeks, whilst his mouth, clammy with prolonged silence, was buried in his moustache and beard.
However, Chaîne, who had just noticed the two friends, reached out his hand to them, as if he had seen them just the day before. He was calm, neither arrogant nor embarrassed about his stall, and he hadn’t aged, still having a leathery look; however, his nose had completely disappeared between his cheeks, while his mouth, damp from long silence, was hidden in his mustache and beard.
‘Hallo! so we meet again!’ said Sandoz, gaily. ‘Do you know, your paintings have a lot of effect?’
‘Hey! Looks like we meet again!’ said Sandoz cheerfully. ‘Did you know, your paintings have a really big impact?’
‘The old humbug!’ added Claude. ‘Why, he has his little Salon all to himself. That’s very cute indeed.’
‘The old trickster!’ added Claude. ‘He has his own little Salon all to himself. That’s pretty cute for sure.’
Chaîne’s face became radiant, and he dropped the remark: ‘Of course!’
Chaîne's face lit up, and he said, "Of course!"
Then, as his artistic pride was roused, he, from whom people barely wrung anything but growls, gave utterance to a whole sentence:
Then, as his artistic pride was stirred, he, from whom people could hardly get anything but grumbles, spoke a complete sentence:
‘Ah! it’s quite certain that if I had had any money, like you fellows, I should have made my way, just as you have done, in spite of everything.’
‘Ah! it’s pretty clear that if I had any money, like you guys, I would have figured it out, just like you have, despite everything.’
That was his conviction. He had never doubted of his talent, he had simply forsaken the profession because it did not feed him. When he visited the Louvre, at sight of the masterpieces hanging there he felt convinced that time alone was necessary to turn out similar work.
That was his belief. He had never doubted his talent; he had just given up the profession because it didn’t provide for him. When he visited the Louvre and saw the masterpieces hanging there, he felt certain that all it took was time to create similar work.
‘Ah, me!’ said Claude, who had become gloomy again. ‘Don’t regret what you’ve done; you alone have succeeded. Business is brisk, eh?’
‘Oh, man!’ said Claude, who had turned gloomy again. ‘Don’t regret what you’ve done; you alone have succeeded. Business is good, huh?’
But Chaîne muttered bitter words. No, no, there was nothing doing, not even in his line. People wouldn’t play for prizes; all the money found its way to the wine-shops. In spite of buying paltry odds and ends, and striking the table with the palm of one’s hand, so that the feather might not indicate one of the big prizes, a fellow barely had water to drink nowadays. Then, as some people had drawn near, he stopped short in his explanation to call out: ‘Walk up, walk up, at every turn you win!’ in a gruff voice which the two others had never known him to possess, and which fairly stupefied them.
But Chaîne muttered harsh words. No, no, there was nothing happening, not even in his area. People wouldn’t play for prizes; all the money ended up in the bars. Despite spending on trivial items and banging the table with his hand to avoid the feather pointing to one of the big prizes, a guy barely had water to drink these days. Then, as some people gathered around, he abruptly stopped his explanation to shout: ‘Step right up, step right up, you win at every turn!’ in a rough voice that the other two had never heard from him before, and it completely stunned them.
A workman who was carrying a sickly little girl with large covetous eyes, let her play two turns. The revolving stands grated and the nick-nacks danced round in dazzling fashion, while the live rabbit, with his ears lowered, revolved and revolved so rapidly that the outline of his body vanished and he became nothing but a whitish circle. There was a moment of great emotion, for the little girl had narrowly missed winning him.
A worker carrying a frail little girl with big, longing eyes let her play a couple of rounds. The spinning stands squeaked, and the trinkets twirled around in a dazzling display, while the live rabbit, with its ears down, spun so fast that its shape disappeared and it became just a white circle. There was a moment of intense emotion, as the little girl had just barely missed winning him.
Then, after shaking hands with Chaîne, who was still trembling with the fright this had given him, the two friends walked away.
Then, after shaking hands with Chaîne, who was still shaking from the scare it had given him, the two friends walked away.
‘He’s happy,’ said Claude, after they had gone some fifty paces in silence.
‘He’s happy,’ Claude said after they had walked about fifty paces in silence.
‘He!’ cried Sandoz; ‘why, he believes he has missed becoming a member of the Institute, and it’s killing him.’
‘Hey!’ cried Sandoz; ‘he really thinks he’s missed out on becoming a member of the Institute, and it’s driving him crazy.’
Shortly after this meeting, and towards the middle of August, Sandoz devised a real excursion which would take up a whole day. He had met Dubuche—Dubuche, careworn and mournful, who had shown himself plaintive and affectionate, raking up the past and inviting his two old chums to lunch at La Richaudière, where he should be alone with his two children for another fortnight. Why shouldn’t they go and surprise him there, since he seemed so desirous of renewing the old intimacy? But in vain did Sandoz repeat that he had promised Dubuche on oath to bring Claude with him; the painter obstinately refused to go, as if he were frightened at the idea of again beholding Bennecourt, the Seine, the islands, all the stretch of country where his happy years lay dead and buried. It was necessary for Christine to interfere, and he finished by giving way, although full of repugnance to the trip. It precisely happened that on the day prior to the appointment he had worked at his painting until very late, being taken with the old fever again. And so the next morning—it was Sunday—being devoured with a longing to paint, he went off most reluctantly, tearing himself away from his picture with a pang. What was the use of returning to Bennecourt? All that was dead, it no longer existed. Paris alone remained, and even in Paris there was but one view, the point of the Cité, that vision which haunted him always and everywhere, that one corner where he ever left his heart.
Shortly after this meeting, around the middle of August, Sandoz planned a real day trip. He had run into Dubuche—who looked tired and sad, but still affectionate—nostalgically reminiscing about the past and inviting his two old friends to lunch at La Richaudière, where he would be alone with his two kids for another two weeks. Why not go and surprise him since he seemed eager to reconnect? But no matter how many times Sandoz insisted that he had promised Dubuche he would bring Claude along, the painter stubbornly refused, almost as if he were afraid to see Bennecourt, the Seine, the islands, and all the countryside where his happy years were long gone. It took Christine to step in, and eventually, he relented, albeit with a lot of hesitation about the trip. The day before their meeting, he had been painting late into the night, getting caught up in that familiar passion again. So the next morning—it was Sunday—despite a strong urge to paint, he set out reluctantly, leaving his artwork behind with a heavy heart. What was the point of going back to Bennecourt? Everything was gone; it no longer existed. Only Paris remained, and even there, the only view that stuck with him was the point of the Cité, the vision that constantly haunted him, that one corner where he had always left his heart.
Sandoz, finding him nervous in the railway carriage, and seeing that his eyes remained fixed on the window as if he had been leaving the city—which had gradually grown smaller and seemed shrouded in mist—for years, did all he could to divert his mind, telling him, for instance, what he knew about Dubuche’s real position. At the outset, old Margaillan, glorifying in his bemedalled son-in-law, had trotted him about and introduced him everywhere as his partner and successor. There was a fellow who would conduct business briskly, who would build houses more cheaply and in finer style than ever, for hadn’t he grown pale over books? But Dubuche’s first idea proved disastrous; on some land belonging to his father-in-law in Burgundy he established a brickyard in so unfavourable a situation, and after so defective a plan, that the venture resulted in the sheer loss of two hundred thousand francs. Then he turned his attention to erecting houses, insisting upon bringing personal ideas into execution, a certain general scheme of his which would revolutionise the building art. These ideas were the old theories he held from the revolutionary chums of his youth, everything that he had promised he would realise when he was free; but he had not properly reduced the theories to method, and he applied them unseasonably, with the awkwardness of a pupil lacking the sacred fire; he experimented with terra-cotta and pottery ornamentation, large bay windows, and especially with the employment of iron—iron girders, iron staircases, and iron roofings; and as the employment of these materials increased the outlay, he again ended with a catastrophe, which was all the greater as he was a pitiful manager, and had lost his head since he had become rich, rendered the more obtuse, it seemed, by money, quite spoilt and at sea, unable even to revert to his old habits of industry. This time Margaillan grew angry; he for thirty years had been buying ground, building and selling again, estimating at a glance the cost and return of house property; so many yards of building at so much the foot having to yield so many suites of rooms at so much rent. He wouldn’t have anything more to do with a fellow who blundered about lime, bricks, millstones, and in fact everything, who employed oak when deal would have suited, and who could not bring himself to cut up a storey—like a consecrated wafer—into as many little squares as was necessary. No, no, none of that! He rebelled against art, after having been ambitious to introduce a little of it into his routine, in order to satisfy a long-standing worry about his own ignorance. And after that matters had gone from bad to worse, terrible quarrels had arisen between the son-in-law and the father-in-law, the former disdainful, intrenching himself behind his science, and the latter shouting that the commonest labourer knew more than an architect did. The millions were in danger, and one fine day Margaillan turned Dubuche out of his offices, forbidding him ever to set foot in them again, since he did not even know how to direct a building-yard where only four men worked. It was a disaster, a lamentable failure, the School of Arts collapsing, derided by a mason!
Sandoz saw that Dubuche was anxious in the train compartment, his eyes glued to the window as if he had been leaving the city—a city that was slowly shrinking and looked like it was enveloped in fog—for years. He tried to keep Dubuche's mind off things by sharing what he knew about his situation. At first, old Margaillan, proudly showcasing his decorated son-in-law, had introduced him everywhere as his partner and successor. Dubuche was a guy who would handle business efficiently, building houses cheaper and better than ever, because he had spent years buried in books. But Dubuche's first project turned out to be a disaster; he set up a brickyard on land belonging to his father-in-law in Burgundy, picking such a bad spot and following such a flawed plan that it led to a total loss of two hundred thousand francs. Then he shifted to building houses, insisting on implementing his own ideas, a grand scheme he believed would revolutionize construction. These ideas came from the old theories he learned from his radical friends when he was young—everything he promised to accomplish once he had his freedom. However, he hadn't properly organized his theories into a method and applied them awkwardly, like a student lacking passion; he played around with terra-cotta and pottery decorations, large bay windows, and particularly the use of iron—iron beams, iron staircases, and iron roofs. But increasing expenses led to his next catastrophe, which was even worse because he was a terrible manager, having lost his head with wealth, it seemed like money had dulled his senses, making him spoiled and lost, unable to return to his prior work habits. Margaillan became furious; for thirty years, he had been buying land, building, and reselling, quickly estimating the costs and returns on properties; so many yards of building at a certain price per foot should yield so many units of rent. He wanted nothing to do with someone who fumbled with lime, bricks, and everything else, who used oak when pine would have worked, and who couldn’t figure out how to divide a floor—like a sacred wafer—into the necessary smaller sections. No, that wasn’t happening! He rejected the arts after trying to incorporate a bit of it into his work to ease his long-standing worry about his own lack of knowledge. From there, things spiraled downwards; huge fights ensued between the son-in-law and father-in-law, with Dubuche being condescending, hiding behind his academic knowledge, while Margaillan yelled that even the most basic worker knew more than an architect. The money was at risk, and one day Margaillan kicked Dubuche out of his offices, telling him never to come back since he couldn’t even manage a construction site with just four workers. It was a disaster, a dismal failure—the School of Arts crumbled, mocked by a mason!
At this point of Sandoz’s story, Claude, who had begun to listen to his friend, inquired:
At this point in Sandoz’s story, Claude, who had started to pay attention to his friend, asked:
‘Then what is Dubuche doing now?’
‘So, what is Dubuche doing right now?’
‘I don’t know—nothing probably,’ answered Sandoz. ‘He told me that he was anxious about his children’s health, and was taking care of them.’
‘I don’t know—probably nothing,’ Sandoz replied. ‘He told me he was worried about his kids’ health and was taking care of them.’
That pale woman, Madame Margaillan, as slender as the blade of a knife, had died of tubercular consumption, which was plainly the hereditary disease, the source of the family’s degeneracy, for her daughter, Régine, had been coughing ever since her marriage. She was now drinking the waters at Mont-Dore, whither she had not dared to take her children, as they had been very poorly the year before, after a season spent in that part, where the air was too keen for them. This explained the scattering of the family: the mother over yonder with her maid; the grandfather in Paris, where he had resumed his great building enterprises, battling amid his four hundred workmen, and crushing the idle and the incapable beneath his contempt; and the father in exile at La Richaudière, set to watch over his son and daughter, shut up there, after the very first struggle, as if it had broken him down for life. In a moment of effusion Dubuche had even let Sandoz understand that as his wife was so extremely delicate he now lived with her merely on friendly terms.
That pale woman, Madame Margaillan, as slender as a knife blade, had died from tuberculosis, which was clearly the inherited illness that caused the family's decline, because her daughter, Régine, had been coughing ever since she got married. She was now drinking the waters at Mont-Dore, where she hadn't dared to bring her children, as they had been very sick the year before after spending a season there, where the air was too harsh for them. This explained the family's separation: the mother over there with her maid; the grandfather in Paris, where he had resumed his big construction projects, battling with his four hundred workers and looking down on the lazy and incapable; and the father in exile at La Richaudière, being tasked with watching over his son and daughter, confined there after the very first struggle, as if it had broken him for life. In a moment of vulnerability, Dubuche had even let Sandoz know that since his wife was so fragile, he now lived with her just as friends.
‘A nice marriage,’ said Sandoz, simply, by way of conclusion.
‘A nice marriage,’ Sandoz said simply, wrapping things up.
It was ten o’clock when the two friends rang at the iron gate of La Richaudière. The estate, with which they were not acquainted, amazed them. There was a superb park, a garden laid out in the French style, with balustrades and steps spreading away in regal fashion; three huge conservatories and a colossal cascade—quite a piece of folly, with its rocks brought from afar, and the quantity of cement and the number of conduits that had been employed in arranging it. Indeed, the owner had sunk a fortune in it, out of sheer vanity. But what struck the friends still more was the melancholy, deserted aspect of the domain; the gravel of the avenues carefully raked, with never a trace of footsteps; the distant expanses quite deserted, save that now and then a solitary gardener passed by; and the house looking lifeless, with all its windows closed, excepting two, which were barely set ajar.
It was ten o’clock when the two friends rang the iron gate at La Richaudière. The estate, which they didn’t know, amazed them. There was a stunning park, a garden designed in the French style, with balustrades and steps extending gracefully; three massive conservatories and a huge waterfall—definitely a bit excessive, with its stones brought from far away, and the amount of cement and the number of pipes that had gone into building it. Really, the owner had spent a fortune on it just for vanity’s sake. But what struck the friends even more was the sad, abandoned look of the property; the gravel on the paths was neatly raked, with not a single footprint to be seen; the wide open spaces were totally empty, except for an occasional gardener passing by; and the house looked lifeless, with all its windows closed, except for two that were barely cracked open.
However, a valet who had decided to show himself began to question them, and when he learnt that they wished to see ‘monsieur,’ he became insolent, and replied that ‘monsieur’ was behind the house in the gymnasium, and then went indoors again.
However, a valet who had decided to make an appearance started to question them, and when he found out they wanted to see 'monsieur,' he became rude and replied that 'monsieur' was behind the house in the gym, and then went back inside.
Sandoz and Claude followed a path which led them towards a lawn, and what they saw there made them pause. Dubuche, who stood in front of a trapeze, was raising his arms to support his son, Gaston, a poor sickly boy who, at ten years of age, still had the slight, soft limbs of early childhood; while the girl, Alice, sat in a perambulator awaiting her turn. She was so imperfectly developed that, although she was six years old, she could not yet walk. The father, absorbed in his task, continued exercising the slim limbs of his little boy, swinging him backwards and forwards, and vainly trying to make him raise himself up by his wrists. Then, as this slight effort sufficed to bring on perspiration, he removed the little fellow from the trapeze and rolled him in a rug. And all this was done amid complete silence, alone under the far expanse of sky, his face wearing a look of distressful pity as he knelt there in that splendid park. However, as he rose up he perceived the two friends.
Sandoz and Claude followed a path that led them to a lawn, and what they saw there made them stop. Dubuche, who was in front of a trapeze, was raising his arms to support his son, Gaston, a frail, sickly boy who, at ten years old, still had the delicate, soft limbs of early childhood; while the girl, Alice, sat in a stroller waiting for her turn. She was so underdeveloped that, even at six years old, she couldn’t walk yet. The father, focused on his task, continued to exercise his little boy’s slim limbs, swinging him back and forth, and trying unsuccessfully to make him lift himself up by his wrists. As this slight effort caused him to sweat, he took the little guy off the trapeze and wrapped him in a blanket. All of this happened in complete silence, alone under the vast sky, his face showing a look of deep pity as he knelt there in that beautiful park. However, as he stood up, he noticed the two friends.
‘What! it’s you? On a Sunday, and without warning me!’
‘What! It’s you? On a Sunday, and you didn’t even give me a heads up!’
He had made a gesture of annoyance, and at once explained that the maid, the only woman to whom he could trust the children, went to Paris on Sundays, and that it was consequently impossible for him to leave Gaston and Alice for a minute.
He rolled his eyes in annoyance and immediately explained that the maid, the only woman he could trust with the kids, went to Paris on Sundays, so it was impossible for him to leave Gaston and Alice for even a minute.
‘I’ll wager that you came to lunch?’ he added.
‘I bet you came to lunch?’ he added.
As Claude gave Sandoz an imploring glance, the novelist made haste to answer:
As Claude looked at Sandoz with a pleading expression, the novelist quickly replied:
‘No, no. As it happens, we only have time enough to shake hands with you. Claude had to come down here on a business matter. He lived at Bennecourt, as you know. And as I accompanied him, we took it into our heads to walk as far as here. But there are people waiting for us, so don’t disturb yourself in the least.’
‘No, no. As it turns out, we only have time to shake hands with you. Claude had to come down here for business. He lives in Bennecourt, as you know. I came with him, and we thought we’d walk as far as here. But there are people waiting for us, so please don’t worry about it.’
Thereupon, Dubuche, who felt relieved, made a show of detaining them. They certainly had an hour to spare, dash it all! And they all three began to talk. Claude looked at Dubuche, astonished to find him so aged; his flabby face had become wrinkled—it was of a yellowish hue, and streaked with red, as if bile had splashed his skin; whilst his hair and his moustaches were already growing grey. In addition, his figure appeared to have become more compact; a bitter weariness made each of his gestures seem an effort. Were defeats in money matters as hard to bear, then, as defeats in art? Everything about this vanquished man—his voice, his glance—proclaimed the shameful dependency in which he had to live: the bankruptcy of his future which was cast in his teeth, with the accusation of having allowed a talent he did not possess to be set down as an asset in the marriage contract. Then there was the family money which he nowadays stole, the money spent on what he ate, the clothes he wore, and the pocket-money he needed—in fact, the perpetual alms which were bestowed upon him, just as they might have been bestowed upon some vulgar swindler, whom one unluckily could not get rid of.
Thereupon, Dubuche, feeling relieved, pretended to hold them back. They definitely had an hour to kill, for goodness' sake! And the three of them started chatting. Claude looked at Dubuche, shocked to see how aged he appeared; his sagging face was wrinkled—it had a yellowish tint, with red streaks as if bile had splashed across it; while his hair and mustache were already going gray. Additionally, his body seemed to have become more compact; a bitter fatigue made every movement feel like a struggle. Were financial defeats as hard to cope with as failures in art? Everything about this beaten man—his voice, his gaze—shouted the shameful dependency he lived under: the bankruptcy of his future that was thrown in his face, with accusations that he had allowed a talent he didn’t have to be considered an asset in the marriage contract. Then there was the family money he now took, the cash he used for food, the clothes he wore, and the pocket money he needed—in fact, the constant handouts given to him, just like they would be for some lowly con artist who couldn’t be shaken off.
‘Wait a bit,’ resumed Dubuche; ‘I have to stop here five minutes longer with one of my poor duckies, and afterwards we’ll go indoors.’
‘Hold on a second,’ Dubuche continued; ‘I need to stay here for five more minutes with one of my little ones, and then we’ll head inside.’
Gently, and with infinite motherly precautions, he removed little Alice from the perambulator and lifted her to the trapeze. Then, stammering coaxing words and smiling, he encouraged her, and left her hanging for a couple of minutes, so as to develop her muscles; but he remained with open arms, watching each movement with the fear of seeing her smashed to pieces, should her weak little wax-like hands relax their hold. She did not say anything, but obeyed him in spite of the terror that this exercise caused her; and she was so pitifully light in weight that she did not even fully stretch the ropes, being like one of those poor scraggy little birds which fall from a young tree without as much as bending it.
Gently, and with endless motherly care, he took little Alice out of the stroller and lifted her to the trapeze. Then, stammering encouraging words and smiling, he urged her on and let her hang for a couple of minutes to help build her muscles; but he stood there with open arms, watching every move with the fear that she might fall and get hurt if her weak little hands let go. She didn’t say a word but followed his lead despite the fear this activity caused her; and she was so incredibly light that she didn’t even stretch the ropes fully, like one of those poor little birds that falls from a young tree without even bending it.
At this moment, Dubuche, having given Gaston a glance, became distracted on remarking that the rug had slipped and that the child’s legs were uncovered.
At that moment, Dubuche, after giving Gaston a quick look, got distracted when he noticed that the rug had slipped and the child's legs were exposed.
‘Good heavens! good heavens! Why, he’ll catch cold on this grass! And I, who can’t move! Gaston, my little dear! It’s the same thing every day; you wait till I’m occupied with your sister. Sandoz, pray cover him over! Ah, thanks! Pull the rug up more; don’t be afraid!’
‘Goodness! Goodness! He’s going to catch a cold on this grass! And I can’t move! Gaston, my dear! It’s the same thing every day; you wait until I’m busy with your sister. Sandoz, please cover him up! Ah, thanks! Pull the rug up more; don’t be shy!’
So this was the outcome of his splendid marriage—those two poor, weak little beings, whom the least breath from the sky threatened to kill like flies. Of the fortune he had married, all that remained to him was the constant grief of beholding those woeful children stricken by the final degeneracy of scrofula and phthisis. However, this big, egotistical fellow showed himself an admirable father. The only energy that remained to him consisted in a determination to make his children live, and he struggled on hour after hour, saving them every morning, and dreading to lose them every night. They alone existed now amid his finished existence, amid the bitterness of his father-in-law’s insulting reproaches, the coldness of his sorry, ailing wife. And he kept to his task in desperation; he finished bringing those children into the world, as it were, by dint of unremitting tenderness.
So this was the result of his grand marriage—those two poor, weak little beings, who were as fragile as flies, easily threatened by the slightest breeze. Of the wealth he had gained through marriage, all he had left was the ongoing sorrow of seeing his pitiful children afflicted by the final decline of scrofula and tuberculosis. Nevertheless, this selfish man proved to be a devoted father. The only strength he had left was his determination to keep his children alive, and he fought tirelessly, saving them every morning and fearing their loss every night. They were his sole reason for living in a life that felt complete but bitter, filled with his father-in-law’s cruel accusations and the indifference of his sickly, unhappy wife. And he persisted in his mission out of desperation; he continued to nurture those children into the world through relentless love.
‘There, my darling, that’s enough, isn’t it?’ he said. ‘You’ll soon see how big and pretty you’ll become.’
‘There, my darling, that’s enough, isn’t it?’ he said. ‘You’ll soon see how big and beautiful you’ll become.’
He then placed Alice in the perambulator again, took Gaston, who was still wrapped up, on one of his arms; and when his friends wished to help him, he declined their offer, pushing the little girl’s vehicle along with his right hand, which had remained free.
He then put Alice back in the stroller, took Gaston, who was still bundled up, in one arm; and when his friends offered to help him, he declined, pushing the little girl’s stroller along with his free right hand.
‘Thanks,’ he said, ‘I’m accustomed to it. Ah! the poor darlings are not heavy; and besides, with servants one can never be sure of anything.’
‘Thanks,’ he said, ‘I’m used to it. Ah! the poor little ones aren’t heavy; and besides, with staff, you can never be sure of anything.’
On entering the house, Sandoz and Claude again saw the valet who had been so insolent; and they noticed that Dubuche trembled before him. The kitchen and the hall shared the contempt of the father-in-law, who paid for everything, and treated ‘madame’s’ husband like a beggar whose presence was merely tolerated out of charity. Each time that a shirt was got ready for him, each time that he asked for some more bread, the servants’ impolite gestures made him feel that he was receiving alms.
On entering the house, Sandoz and Claude saw the arrogant valet again, and they noticed that Dubuche was nervous around him. The kitchen and the hall reflected the disdain of the father-in-law, who paid for everything and treated ‘madame’s’ husband like a beggar whose presence was only tolerated out of pity. Every time a shirt was prepared for him, every time he asked for more bread, the servants' rude gestures made him feel like he was receiving charity.
‘Well, good-bye, we must leave you,’ said Sandoz, who suffered at the sight of it all.
‘Well, goodbye, we have to go,’ said Sandoz, who felt distressed by the whole scene.
‘No, no, wait a bit. The children are going to breakfast, and afterwards I’ll accompany you with them. They must go for their outing.’
‘No, no, hold on a second. The kids are going to breakfast, and after that, I'll go with you and them. They need to go out for their outing.’
Each day was regulated hour by hour. Of a morning came the baths and the gymnastics; then the breakfast, which was quite an affair, as the children needed special food, which was duly discussed and weighed. And matters were carried to such a point that even their wine and water was slightly warmed, for fear that too chilly a drop might give them a cold. On this occasion they each partook of the yolk of an egg diluted in some broth, and a mutton cutlet, which the father cut up into tiny morsels. Then, prior to the siesta, came the promenade.
Each day was scheduled hour by hour. In the morning, there were baths and gymnastics; then breakfast, which was quite an event since the kids needed special food that was carefully discussed and weighed. It even got to the point where their wine and water was slightly warmed, to avoid the risk of a cold from anything too cold. On this occasion, they each had the yolk of an egg mixed in some broth, along with a mutton cutlet that their father cut into tiny pieces. Then, before the nap, they took a walk.
Sandoz and Claude found themselves once more out-of-doors, walking down the broad avenues with Dubuche, who again propelled Alice’s perambulator, whilst Gaston walked beside him. They talked about the estate as they went towards the gate. The master glanced over the park with timid, nervous eyes, as if he did not feel at home. Besides he did not know anything; he did not occupy himself about anything. He appeared even to have forgotten the profession which he was said to be ignorant of, and seemed to have gone astray, to be bowed down by sheer inaction.
Sandoz and Claude found themselves outside again, walking down the wide streets with Dubuche, who was once again pushing Alice’s stroller, while Gaston walked alongside him. They chatted about the estate as they headed toward the gate. The master looked over the park with anxious, nervous eyes, as if he didn’t feel at home. Besides, he didn’t know anything; he wasn’t focused on anything. He seemed to have even forgotten the profession that he was claimed to be clueless about, and he appeared lost, weighed down by total inactivity.
‘And your parents, how are they?’ asked Sandoz.
‘And how are your parents?’ asked Sandoz.
A spark was once more kindled in Dubuche’s dim eyes.
A spark was once again ignited in Dubuche’s dim eyes.
‘Oh! my parents are happy,’ he said; ‘I bought them a little house, where they live on the annuity which I had specified in my marriage contract. Well, you see, mamma had advanced enough money for my education, and I had to return it to her, as I had promised, eh? Yes, I can at least say that my parents have nothing to reproach me with.’
‘Oh! my parents are happy,’ he said; ‘I bought them a little house, where they live off the annuity I set up in my marriage contract. Well, you see, Mom lent me enough money for my education, and I had to pay her back, as I promised, right? Yes, I can at least say that my parents have nothing to blame me for.’
Having reached the gate, they tarried there for a few minutes. At last, still looking crushed, Dubuche shook hands with his old comrades; and retaining Claude’s hand in his, he concluded, as if making a simple statement of fact quite devoid of anger:
Having reached the gate, they stayed there for a few minutes. Finally, still looking defeated, Dubuche shook hands with his old friends; and holding onto Claude’s hand, he said, as if stating a simple fact without any anger:
‘Good-bye; try to get out of worry! As for me, I’ve spoilt my life.’
‘Goodbye; try not to stress too much! As for me, I've messed up my life.’
And they watched him walk back towards the house, pushing the perambulator, and supporting Gaston, who was already stumbling with fatigue—he, Dubuche, himself having his back bent and the heavy tread of an old man.
And they watched him walk back to the house, pushing the stroller and supporting Gaston, who was already stumbling from exhaustion—he, Dubuche, himself hunched over and moving with the heavy gait of an old man.
One o’clock was striking, and they both hurried down towards Bennecourt, saddened and ravenous. But mournfulness awaited them there as well; a murderous blast had swept over the place, both Faucheurs, husband and wife, and old Porrette, were all dead; and the inn, having fallen into the hands of that goose Mélie, was becoming repugnant with its filth and coarseness. An abominable repast was served them, an omelette with hairs in it, and cutlets smelling of grease, in the centre of the common room, to which an open window admitted the pestilential odour of a dung heap, while the place was so full of flies that they positively blackened the tables. The heat of the burning afternoon came in with the stench, and Claude and Sandoz did not even feel the courage to order any coffee; they fled.
One o'clock was striking, and they both hurried down towards Bennecourt, feeling sad and hungry. But more sadness awaited them there; a devastating attack had hit the place, leaving both Faucheurs, husband and wife, and old Porrette all dead. The inn, now under the control of that awful Mélie, was becoming disgusting with its dirt and rudeness. They were served a terrible meal, an omelet with hairs in it, and greasy cutlets in the middle of the common room, where an open window let in the foul smell of a manure pile, and the place was so full of flies that they nearly darkened the tables. The heat of the blazing afternoon mixed with the stench, and Claude and Sandoz didn't even have the courage to order any coffee; they just left.
‘And you who used to extol old Mother Faucheur’s omelettes!’ said Sandoz. ‘The place is done for. We are going for a turn, eh?’
‘And you who used to rave about old Mother Faucheur’s omelettes!’ said Sandoz. ‘The place is finished. Are we going for a walk, then?’
Claude was inclined to refuse. Ever since the morning he had had but one idea—that of walking on as fast as possible, as if each step would shorten the disagreeable task and bring him back to Paris. His heart, his head, his whole being had remained there. He looked neither to right nor to left, he glided along without distinguishing aught of the fields or trees, having but one fixed idea in his brain, a prey to such hallucinations that at certain moments he fancied the point of the Cité rose up and called to him from amid the vast expanse of stubble. However, Sandoz’s proposal aroused memories in his mind; and, softening somewhat, he replied:
Claude was leaning towards saying no. Ever since that morning, he had only one thought — to keep walking as quickly as possible, as if each step would make the unpleasant task shorter and get him back to Paris. His heart, his mind, his entire being were still there. He didn’t look to the right or the left; he moved forward without noticing the fields or trees, consumed by a single idea in his mind, suffering from such vivid daydreams that at times he imagined the tip of the Cité rising up and calling to him from the endless fields of stubble. However, Sandoz’s suggestion brought back memories, and softening a bit, he replied:
‘Yes, that’s it, we’ll have a look.’
‘Yes, that’s it, we’ll check it out.’
But as they advanced along the river bank, he became indignant and grieved. He could scarcely recognise the place. A bridge had been built to connect Bennecourt with Bonnières: a bridge, good heavens! in the place of the old ferry-boat, grating against its chain—the old black boat which, cutting athwart the current, had been so full of interest to the artistic eye. Moreover, a dam established down-stream at Port-Villez had raised the level of the river, most of the islands of yore were now submerged, and the little armlets of the stream had become broader. There were no more pretty nooks, no more rippling alleys amid which one could lose oneself; it was a disaster that inclined one to strangle all the river engineers!
But as they walked along the riverbank, he felt angry and sad. He could barely recognize the place. A bridge had been built to connect Bennecourt with Bonnières: a bridge, for goodness’ sake! instead of the old ferry, creaking against its chain—the old black boat that used to cut across the current, so captivating to the artistic eye. Plus, a dam set up downstream at Port-Villez had raised the river level; most of the islands that used to be there were now underwater, and the little channels of the stream had widened. There were no more charming spots, no more winding paths where one could get lost; it was a disaster that made him want to strangle all the river engineers!
‘Why, that clump of pollards still emerging from the water on the left,’ cried Claude, ‘was the Barreux Island, where we used to chat together, lying on the grass! You remember, don’t you? Ah! the scoundrels!’
‘Why, that group of tree stumps still sticking out of the water on the left,’ cried Claude, ‘was Barreux Island, where we used to hang out and lie on the grass! You remember, right? Ah! the jerks!’
Sandoz, who could never see a tree felled without shaking his fist at the wood-cutter, turned pale with anger, and felt exasperated that the authorities had thus dared to mutilate nature.
Sandoz, who could never watch a tree fall without raising his fist at the logger, turned pale with rage and felt frustrated that the authorities had the nerve to damage nature like that.
Then, as Claude approached his old home, he became silent, and his teeth clenched. The house had been sold to some middle-class folk, and now there was an iron gate, against which he pressed his face. The rose-bushes were all dead, the apricot trees were dead also; the garden, which looked very trim, with its little pathways and its square-cut beds of flowers and vegetables, bordered with box, was reflected in a large ball of plated glass set upon a stand in the very centre of it; and the house, newly whitewashed and painted at the corners and round the doors and windows, in a manner to imitate freestone, suggested some clownish parvenu awkwardly arrayed in his Sunday toggery. The sight fairly enraged the painter. No, no, nothing of himself, nothing of Christine, nothing of the great love of their youth remained there! He wished to look still further; he turned round behind the house, and sought for the wood of oak trees where they had left the living quiver of their embraces; but the wood was dead, dead like all the rest, felled, sold, and burnt! Then he made a gesture of anathema, in which he cast all his grief to that stretch of country which was now so changed that he could not find in it one single token of his past life. And so a few years sufficed to efface the spot where one had laboured, loved, and suffered! What was the use of man’s vain agitation if the wind behind him swept and carried away all the traces of his footsteps? He had rightly realised that he ought not to return thither, for the past is simply the cemetery of our illusions, where our feet for ever stumble against tombstones!
Then, as Claude got closer to his old home, he fell silent and clenched his teeth. The house had been sold to some middle-class people, and now there was an iron gate, against which he pressed his face. The rose bushes were all dead, and the apricot trees were dead too; the garden, which looked very neat with its little paths and square-cut beds of flowers and vegetables bordered with boxwood, was reflected in a large ball of mirrored glass placed in the center of it; and the house, freshly whitewashed and painted at the corners and around the doors and windows to mimic gray stone, looked like a clumsy upstart awkwardly dressed in its Sunday best. The sight infuriated the painter. No, no, none of himself, none of Christine, none of the great love of their youth remained there! He wanted to look even further; he turned around behind the house and searched for the oak woods where they had left the living memory of their embraces; but the woods were dead, just like everything else—cut down, sold, and burned! Then he made a gesture of curse, casting all his grief toward that stretch of land that had changed so much he couldn't find a single trace of his past life in it. And so, just a few years were enough to erase the place where one had worked, loved, and suffered! What was the point of man's futile struggles if the wind behind him swept away all the traces of his footsteps? He had realized he shouldn't return, for the past is just the graveyard of our illusions, where our feet forever stumble against tombstones!
‘Let us go!’ he cried; ‘let us go at once! It’s stupid to torture one’s heart like this!’
‘Let’s go!’ he shouted; ‘let’s go right now! It’s pointless to put your heart through this!’
When they were on the new bridge, Sandoz tried to calm him by showing him the view which had not formerly existed, the widened bed of the Seine, full to the brim, as it were, and the water flowing onward, proudly and slowly. But this water failed to interest Claude, until he reflected that it was the same water which, as it passed through Paris, had bathed the old quay walls of the Cité; and then he felt touched, he leant over the parapet of the bridge for a moment, and thought that he could distinguish glorious reflections in it—the towers of Notre-Dame, and the needle-like spire of the Sainte-Chapelle, carried along by the current towards the sea.
When they were on the new bridge, Sandoz tried to calm him by showing him the view that hadn’t been there before: the wide bed of the Seine, filled to the brim, and the water flowing proudly and slowly. But this water didn't interest Claude until he realized it was the same water that had washed over the old quay walls of the Cité as it flowed through Paris. Then he felt a sense of nostalgia; he leaned over the bridge's railing for a moment and thought he could see beautiful reflections in it—the towers of Notre-Dame and the slender spire of the Sainte-Chapelle, being carried along by the current towards the sea.
The two friends missed the three o’clock train, and it was real torture to have to spend two long hours more in that region, where everything weighed so heavily on their shoulders. Fortunately, they had forewarned Christine and Madame Sandoz that they might return by a night train if they were detained. So they resolved upon a bachelor dinner at a restaurant on the Place du Havre, hoping to set themselves all right again by a good chat at dessert as in former times. Eight o’clock was about to strike when they sat down to table.
The two friends missed the three o’clock train, and it was really torturous to have to spend two more long hours in that area, where everything felt so heavy on their shoulders. Fortunately, they had let Christine and Madame Sandoz know that they might come back on a night train if they were delayed. So, they decided to have a guys' dinner at a restaurant on the Place du Havre, hoping to feel better again with a good chat over dessert like they used to. It was almost eight o’clock when they sat down at the table.
Claude, on leaving the terminus, with his feet once more on the Paris pavement, had lost his nervous agitation, like a man who at last finds himself once more at home. And with the cold, absent-minded air which he now usually displayed, he listened to Sandoz trying to enliven him. The novelist treated his friend like a mistress whose head he wished to turn; they partook of delicate, highly spiced dishes and heady wines. But mirth was rebellious, and Sandoz himself ended by becoming gloomy. All his hopes of immortality were shaken by his excursion to that ungrateful country village, that Bennecourt, so loved and so forgetful, where he and Claude had not found a single stone retaining any recollection of them. If things which are eternal forget so soon, can one place any reliance for one hour on the memory of man?
Claude, as he left the train station and stepped back onto the streets of Paris, felt his nervousness fade away, like someone finally arriving home. With his usual cold, distant demeanor, he listened to Sandoz trying to cheer him up. The novelist treated his friend like a lover he wanted to impress; they enjoyed delicate, spicy dishes and strong wines. But laughter was elusive, and Sandoz eventually grew gloomy himself. All his dreams of immortality were shaken by their trip to that ungrateful little village, Bennecourt, so beloved yet so forgetful, where he and Claude hadn’t found a single stone that remembered them. If eternal things forget so quickly, how can we trust that the memory of man will last even an hour?
‘Do you know, old fellow,’ said the novelist, ‘it’s that which sometimes sends me into a cold sweat. Have you ever reflected that posterity may not be the faultless dispenser of justice that we dream of? One consoles oneself for being insulted and denied, by relying on the equity of the centuries to come; just as the faithful endure all the abominations of this earth in the firm belief of another life, in which each will be rewarded according to his deserts. But suppose Paradise exists no more for the artist than it does for the Catholic, suppose that future generations prolong the misunderstanding and prefer amiable little trifles to vigorous works! Ah! what a sell it would be, eh? To have led a convict’s life—to have screwed oneself down to one’s work—all for a mere delusion! Please notice that it’s quite possible, after all. There are some consecrated reputations which I wouldn’t give a rap for. Classical education has deformed everything, and has imposed upon us as geniuses men of correct, facile talent, who follow the beaten track. To them one may prefer men of free tendencies, whose work is at times unequal; but these are only known to a few people of real culture, so that it looks as if immortality might really go merely to the middle-class “average” talent, to the men whose names are forced into our brains at school, when we are not strong enough to defend ourselves. But no, no, one mustn’t say those things; they make me shudder! Should I have the courage to go on with my task, should I be able to remain erect amid all the jeering around me if I hadn’t the consoling illusion that I shall some day be appreciated?’
‘You know,’ said the novelist, ‘there are times when this really stresses me out. Have you ever thought that future generations might not be the perfect judges we hope they are? We comfort ourselves for being insulted and overlooked by trusting in the fairness of the future; just like the faithful endure all the horrors of this world, fully believing in another life where everyone gets what they deserve. But what if Paradise doesn’t exist for the artist any more than it does for the Catholic? What if future generations continue the misunderstanding and prefer charming little trinkets over bold works? What a letdown that would be, right? Living like a convict—forcing myself to focus on my work—all for a mere illusion! It’s entirely possible, though. There are some well-respected names I wouldn’t care about at all. A classical education has twisted everything and has pushed onto us as geniuses people with easy, conventional talent who stick to the mainstream. Some people might prefer those with more adventurous styles, whose work can be hit or miss; but they’re only known to a handful of genuinely educated people, so it seems like immortality might really go only to the average talents, the ones whose names are drilled into our heads at school when we’re too weak to defend ourselves. But no, no, I shouldn’t think like that; it gives me chills! Would I have the guts to continue my work, to stand tall amidst all the mockery, if I didn’t have the comforting hope that someday I would be recognized?’
Claude had listened with his dolorous expression, and he now made a gesture of indifference tinged with bitterness.
Claude had listened with a sad look on his face, and now he made a gesture of indifference mixed with bitterness.
‘Bah! what does it matter? Well, there’s nothing hereafter. We are even madder than the fools who kill themselves for a woman. When the earth splits to pieces in space like a dry walnut, our works won’t add one atom to its dust.’
‘Bah! What does it matter? Well, there’s nothing after this. We’re even crazier than the fools who take their own lives for a woman. When the earth breaks apart in space like a dry walnut, our achievements won’t contribute even one atom to its dust.’
‘That’s quite true,’ summed up Sandoz, who was very pale. ‘What’s the use of trying to fill up the void of space? And to think that we know it, and that our pride still battles all the same!’
‘That’s totally true,’ summed up Sandoz, who looked really pale. ‘What’s the point of trying to fill the emptiness of space? And to think that we know it, and yet our pride still fights against it!’
They left the restaurant, roamed about the streets, and foundered again in the depths of a café, where they philosophised. They had come by degrees to raking up the memories of their childhood, and this ended by filling their hearts with sadness. One o’clock in the morning struck when they decided to go home.
They left the restaurant, wandered through the streets, and eventually ended up at a café, where they talked about life. They gradually started reminiscing about their childhood, which ultimately filled them with sadness. It was one o’clock in the morning when they decided to head home.
However, Sandoz talked of seeing Claude as far as the Rue Tourlaque. That August night was a superb one, the air was warm, the sky studded with stars. And as they went the round by way of the Quartier de l’Europe, they passed before the old Café Baudequin on the Boulevard des Batignolles. It had changed hands three times. It was no longer arranged inside in the same manner as formerly; there were now a couple of billiard tables on the right hand; and several strata of customers had followed each other thither, one covering the other, so that the old frequenters had disappeared like buried nations. However, curiosity, the emotion they had derived from all the past things they had been raking up together, induced them to cross the boulevard and to glance into the café through the open doorway. They wanted to see their table of yore, on the left hand, right at the back of the room.
However, Sandoz mentioned seeing Claude as far as Rue Tourlaque. That August night was beautiful; the air was warm, and the sky was filled with stars. As they took the route through the Quartier de l’Europe, they passed by the old Café Baudequin on Boulevard des Batignolles. It had changed ownership three times. The interior was no longer set up like it used to be; there were now a couple of billiard tables on the right side, and different groups of customers had come and gone, one after another, until the old regulars had vanished like lost civilizations. Yet, curiosity and the memories they had been reminiscing over pushed them to cross the boulevard and peek into the café through the open doorway. They wanted to see their old table on the left, right at the back of the room.
‘Oh, look!’ said Sandoz, stupefied.
“Wow!” said Sandoz, amazed.
‘Gagnière!’ muttered Claude.
‘Gagnière!’ mumbled Claude.
It was indeed Gagnière, seated all alone at that table at the end of the empty café. He must have come from Melun for one of the Sunday concerts to which he treated himself; and then, in the evening, while astray in Paris, an old habit of his legs had led him to the Café Baudequin. Not one of the comrades ever set foot there now, and he, who had beheld another age, obstinately remained there alone. He had not yet touched his glass of beer; he was looking at it, so absorbed in thought that he did not even stir when the waiters began piling the chairs on the tables, in order that everything might be ready for the morrow’s sweeping.
It was definitely Gagnière, sitting all by himself at that table at the back of the empty café. He must have come from Melun for one of the Sunday concerts that he treated himself to; and then, in the evening, while wandering around Paris, an old habit had led him to the Café Baudequin. None of his friends ever went there anymore, and he, having seen another era, stubbornly stayed there alone. He hadn't even touched his glass of beer; he was staring at it, so deep in thought that he didn’t move even when the waiters started stacking the chairs on the tables to prepare for the next day's cleaning.
The two friends hurried off, upset by the sight of that dim figure, seized as it were with a childish fear of ghosts. They parted in the Rue Tourlaque.
The two friends rushed away, shaken by the sight of that shadowy figure, caught up in a childlike fear of ghosts. They separated on Rue Tourlaque.
‘Ah! that poor devil Dubuche!’ said Sandoz as he pressed Claude’s hand, ‘he spoilt our day for us.’
‘Ah! that poor guy Dubuche!’ said Sandoz as he squeezed Claude’s hand, ‘he ruined our day.’
As soon as November had come round, and when all the old friends were back in Paris again, Sandoz thought of gathering them together at one of those Thursday dinners which had remained a habit with him. They were always his greatest delight. The sale of his books was increasing, and he was growing rich; the flat in the Rue de Londres was becoming quite luxurious compared with the little house at Batignolles; but he himself remained immutable. On this occasion, he was anxious, in his good nature, to procure real enjoyment for Claude by organising one of the dear evenings of their youth. So he saw to the invitations; Claude and Christine naturally must come; next Jory and his wife, the latter of whom it had been necessary to receive since her marriage, then Dubuche, who always came alone, with Fagerolles, Mahoudeau, and finally Gagnière. There would be ten of them—all the men comrades of the old band, without a single outsider, in order that the good understanding and jollity might be complete.
As soon as November rolled around and all the old friends were back in Paris, Sandoz thought about bringing them together for one of those Thursday dinners that had become his tradition. They were always his greatest joy. His book sales were up, and he was getting rich; the flat on Rue de Londres was becoming quite luxurious compared to the little house in Batignolles; but he himself stayed the same. This time, he was eager, in his good-natured way, to create a real evening of fun for Claude by organizing one of those beloved nights from their youth. So he took care of the invitations; Claude and Christine obviously had to come; then Jory and his wife, whom he had to include since their marriage, followed by Dubuche, who always came alone, along with Fagerolles, Mahoudeau, and finally Gagnière. There would be ten of them—all the guy friends from the old crew, without a single outsider, to ensure that everything would be relaxed and cheerful.
Henriette, who was more mistrustful than her husband, hesitated when this list of guests was decided upon.
Henriette, who was more skeptical than her husband, hesitated when this list of guests was finalized.
‘Oh! Fagerolles? You believe in having Fagerolles with the others? They hardly like him—nor Claude either; I fancied I noticed a coolness—’
‘Oh! Fagerolles? You think it’s good to have Fagerolles around with the others? They barely like him—nor Claude either; I thought I sensed some tension—’
But he interrupted her, bent on not admitting it.
But he cut her off, determined not to admit it.
‘What! a coolness? It’s really funny, but women can’t understand that fellows chaff each other. All that doesn’t prevent them from having their hearts in the right place.’
‘What! A coolness? It’s really funny, but women can’t understand that guys joke around with each other. That doesn’t stop them from having their hearts in the right place.’
Henriette took especial care in preparing the menu for that Thursday dinner. She now had quite a little staff to overlook, a cook, a man-servant, and so on; and if she no longer prepared any of the dishes herself, she still saw that very delicate fare was provided, out of affection for her husband, whose sole vice was gluttony. She went to market with the cook, and called in person on the tradespeople. She and her husband had a taste for gastronomical curiosities from the four corners of the world. On this occasion they decided to have some ox-tail soup, grilled mullet, undercut of beef with mushrooms, raviolis in the Italian fashion, hazel-hens from Russia, and a salad of truffles, without counting caviare and kilkis as side-dishes, a glace pralinée, and a little emerald-coloured Hungarian cheese, with fruit and pastry. As wine, some old Bordeaux claret in decanters, chambertin with the roast, and sparkling moselle at dessert, in lieu of champagne, which was voted commonplace.
Henriette took special care in preparing the menu for that Thursday dinner. She now had quite a little staff to manage, including a cook and a male servant; and while she no longer cooked any of the dishes herself, she still ensured that very delicate food was provided out of love for her husband, whose only vice was gluttony. She went to the market with the cook and personally visited the vendors. She and her husband had a taste for culinary curiosities from around the world. For this occasion, they decided on some oxtail soup, grilled mullet, beef tenderloin with mushrooms, Italian-style ravioli, hazel hens from Russia, and a truffle salad, not to mention caviar and kilkis as side dishes, a praline dessert, and a little emerald-colored Hungarian cheese, with fruit and pastry. For wine, they chose some old Bordeaux claret in decanters, chambertin with the roast, and sparkling moselle with dessert, instead of champagne, which they deemed too ordinary.
At seven o’clock Sandoz and Henriette were waiting for their guests, he simply wearing a jacket, and she looking very elegant in a plain dress of black satin. People dined at their house in frock-coats, without any fuss. The drawing-room, the arrangements of which they were now completing, was becoming crowded with old furniture, old tapestry, nick-nacks of all countries and all times—a rising and now overflowing stream of things which had taken source at Batignolles with an old pot of Rouen ware, which Henriette had given her husband on one of his fête days. They ran about to the curiosity shops together; a joyful passion for buying possessed them. Sandoz satisfied the longings of his youth, the romanticist ambitions which the first books he had read had given birth to. Thus this writer, so fiercely modern, lived amid the worm-eaten middle ages which he had dreamt of when he was a lad of fifteen. As an excuse, he laughingly declared that handsome modern furniture cost too much, whilst with old things, even common ones, you immediately obtained something with effect and colour. There was nothing of the collector about him, he was entirely concerned as to decoration and broad effects; and to tell the truth, the drawing-room, lighted by two lamps of old Delft ware, had quite a soft warm tint with the dull gold of the dalmaticas used for upholstering the seats, the yellowish incrustations of the Italian cabinets and Dutch show-cases, the faded hues of the Oriental door-hangings, the hundred little notes of the ivory, crockery and enamel work, pale with age, which showed against the dull red hangings of the room.
At seven o’clock, Sandoz and Henriette were waiting for their guests. He was simply wearing a jacket, and she looked very elegant in a plain black satin dress. People dined at their home in formal wear, without any fuss. The drawing-room, which they were currently finishing up, was getting crowded with old furniture, vintage tapestries, and knick-knacks from all over the world and different eras—a growing and now overflowing collection of items that started with an old Rouen pot that Henriette had gifted her husband on one of his special days. They would wander around antique shops together, driven by a joyful passion for buying. Sandoz was fulfilling the desires of his youth, the romantic ambitions sparked by the first books he had read. So this fiercely modern writer lived amidst the worn-out medieval style that he had dreamed of as a fifteen-year-old. As an excuse, he jokingly claimed that stylish modern furniture was too expensive, while with old items, even the ordinary ones, you instantly got something impactful and colorful. He wasn’t a collector; he was entirely focused on decoration and overall aesthetics. To be honest, the drawing-room, lit by two old Delft lamps, had a nice warm glow from the dull gold of the upholstery, the yellowish inlays of the Italian cabinets and Dutch display cases, the faded colors of the Oriental door hangings, and the hundred little accents of the ivory, crockery, and aged enamel that stood out against the dull red drapes in the room.
Claude and Christine were the first to arrive. The latter had put on her only silk dress—an old, worn-out garment which she preserved with especial care for such occasions. Henriette at once took hold of both her hands and drew her to a sofa. She was very fond of her, and questioned her, seeing her so strange, touchingly pale, and with anxious eyes. What was the matter? Did she feel poorly? No, no, she answered that she was very gay and very pleased to come; but while she spoke, she kept on glancing at Claude, as if to study him, and then looked away. He seemed excited, evincing a feverishness in his words and gestures which he had not shown for a month past. At intervals, however, his agitation subsided, and he remained silent, with his eyes wide open, gazing vacantly into space at something which he fancied was calling him.
Claude and Christine were the first to arrive. Christine had put on her only silk dress—an old, worn-out piece that she carefully saved for special occasions. Henriette immediately took both her hands and pulled her over to a sofa. She was very fond of her and started asking questions, noticing how strange she looked, with her pale face and anxious eyes. What was wrong? Was she feeling unwell? No, she insisted she was very happy and excited to be there; but while she spoke, she kept glancing at Claude, as if trying to read him, then looking away. He seemed anxious, displaying a restlessness in his words and gestures that he hadn't shown in a month. However, there were moments when his agitation faded, and he sat silently, his eyes wide open, staring blankly into space at something he thought was calling to him.
‘Ah! old man,’ he said to Sandoz, ‘I finished reading your book last night. It’s deucedly clever; you have shut up their mouths this time!’
‘Ah! old man,’ he said to Sandoz, ‘I finished reading your book last night. It’s incredibly clever; you’ve really silenced them this time!’
They both talked standing in front of the chimney-piece, where some logs were blazing. Sandoz had indeed just published a new novel, and although his critics did not disarm, there was at last that stir of success which establishes a man’s reputation despite the persistent attacks of his adversaries. Besides, he had no illusions; he knew very well that the battle, even if it were won, would begin again at each fresh book he wrote. The great work of his life was advancing, that series of novels which he launched forth in volumes one after another in stubborn, regular fashion, marching towards the goal he had selected without letting anything, obstacles, insults, or fatigue, conquer him.
They both stood in front of the fireplace, where some logs were crackling. Sandoz had just published a new novel, and even though his critics weren't letting up, there was finally that buzz of success that builds a person's reputation despite the ongoing attacks from his opponents. Besides, he wasn’t naïve; he knew that the battle, even if it was won, would start over with every new book he wrote. The significant work of his life was moving forward, a series of novels that he released one after another in a determined, consistent manner, pushing toward the goal he had set without allowing anything—obstacles, insults, or fatigue—to defeat him.
‘It’s true,’ he gaily replied, ‘they are weakening this time. There’s even one who has been foolish enough to admit that I’m an honest man! See how everything degenerates! But they’ll make up for it, never fear! I know some of them whose nuts are too much unlike my own to let them accept my literary formula, my boldness of language, and my physiological characters acting under the influence of circumstances; and I refer to brother writers who possess self-respect; I leave the fools and the scoundrels on one side. For a man to be able to work on pluckily, it is best for him to expect neither good faith nor justice. To be in the right he must begin by dying.’
‘It's true,’ he replied cheerfully, ‘they're getting weaker this time. There's even one who's been silly enough to say that I'm an honest man! Look at how everything declines! But they'll make up for it, don't worry! I know some of them whose ideas are way too different from mine to accept my writing style, my bold use of language, and my characters acting based on their circumstances; and I'm talking about fellow writers who have self-respect; I’ll leave the fools and the dishonest ones aside. For a person to be able to work steadily, it’s best for them to expect neither good faith nor justice. To be in the right, he must start by being ready to sacrifice everything.’
At this Claude’s eyes abruptly turned towards a corner of the drawing-room, as if to pierce the wall and go far away yonder, whither something had summoned him. Then they became hazy and returned from their journey, whilst he exclaimed:
At this, Claude's eyes suddenly shifted to a corner of the drawing room, as if trying to see through the wall and reach somewhere far away, where something seemed to be calling him. Then they grew distant and came back from that place, while he exclaimed:
‘Oh! you speak for yourself! I should do wrong to kick the bucket. No matter, your book sent me into a deuced fever. I wanted to paint to-day, but I couldn’t. Ah! it’s lucky that I can’t get jealous of you, else you would make me too unhappy.’
‘Oh! you’re just looking out for yourself! It would be wrong of me to give up. Anyway, your book gave me quite the fever. I wanted to paint today, but I just couldn’t. Ah! it’s a good thing I can’t get jealous of you, or you would make me really unhappy.’
However, the door had opened, and Mathilde came in, followed by Jory. She was richly attired in a tunic of nasturtium-hued velvet and a skirt of straw-coloured satin, with diamonds in her ears and a large bouquet of roses on her bosom. What astonished Claude the most was that he did not recognise her, for she had become plump, round, and fair skinned, instead of thin and sunburnt as he had known her. Her disturbing ugliness had departed in a swelling of the face; her mouth, once noted for its black voids, now displayed teeth which looked over-white whenever she condescended to smile, with a disdainful curling of the upper lip. You could guess that she had become immoderately respectable; her five and forty summers gave her weight beside her husband, who was younger than herself and seemed to be her nephew. The only thing of yore that clung to her was a violent perfume; she drenched herself with the strongest essences, as if she had been anxious to wash from her skin the smell of all the aromatic simples with which she had been impregnated by her herbalist business; however, the sharpness of rhubarb, the bitterness of elder-seed, and the warmth of peppermint clung to her; and as soon as she crossed the drawing-room, it was filled with an undefinable smell like that of a chemist’s shop, relieved by an acute odour of musk.
However, the door had opened, and Mathilde came in, followed by Jory. She was dressed in a rich tunic of bright orange velvet and a skirt of straw-colored satin, with diamonds in her ears and a large bouquet of roses on her chest. What surprised Claude the most was that he didn’t recognize her, as she had become plump, round, and fair-skinned, instead of the thin and sunburned person he had known. Her unsettling ugliness had faded away, replaced by a fuller face; her mouth, once marked by gaps, now showcased overly white teeth whenever she smiled, often with a disdainful curl of her upper lip. You could tell that she had become excessively respectable; her forty-five years gave her a certain gravity beside her husband, who was younger than her and looked like he could be her nephew. The only thing that remained from the past was her overpowering perfume; she doused herself in strong scents, as if trying to wash away the smell of all the herbal remedies she had been surrounded by in her herbalist business; however, the sharpness of rhubarb, the bitterness of elder seed, and the warmth of peppermint clung to her. As soon as she crossed the drawing-room, it filled with an indescribable scent reminiscent of a chemist's shop, accented by a sharp musk odor.
Henriette, who had risen, made her sit down beside Christine, saying:
Henriette, who had gotten up, made her sit down next to Christine, saying:
‘You know each other, don’t you? You have already met here.’
‘You guys know each other, right? You've already met here.’
Mathilde gave but a cold glance at the modest attire of that woman who had lived for a long time with a man, so it was said, before being married to him. She herself was exceedingly rigid respecting such matters since the tolerance prevailing in literary and artistic circles had admitted her to a few drawing-rooms. Henriette hated her, however, and after the customary exchange of courtesies, not to be dispensed with, resumed her conversation with Christine.
Mathilde shot a cold look at the plain outfit of the woman who had supposedly lived with a man for a long time before marrying him. She herself was very strict about such things, especially since the leniency found in literary and artistic circles had allowed her to enter a few social gatherings. However, Henriette disliked her, and after the usual polite greetings, which couldn’t be skipped, she went back to her chat with Christine.
Jory had shaken hands with Claude and Sandoz, and, standing near them, in front of the fireplace, he apologised for an article slashing the novelist’s new book which had appeared that very morning in his review.
Jory had shaken hands with Claude and Sandoz and, standing near them in front of the fireplace, he apologized for an article criticizing the novelist’s new book that had come out that very morning in his review.
‘As you know very well, my dear fellow, one is never the master in one’s own house. I ought to see to everything, but I have so little time! I hadn’t even read that article, I relied on what had been told me about it. So you will understand how enraged I was when I read it this afternoon. I am dreadfully grieved, dreadfully grieved—’
‘As you know very well, my friend, you're never really in charge in your own house. I should be managing everything, but I have so little time! I hadn’t even read that article; I was just going off what I’d been told about it. So you can imagine how angry I was when I read it this afternoon. I’m extremely upset, extremely upset—’
‘Oh, let it be! It’s the natural order of things,’ replied Sandoz, quietly. ‘Now that my enemies are beginning to praise me, it’s only proper that my friends should attack me.’
‘Oh, let it go! It’s the way things are,’ replied Sandoz, calmly. ‘Now that my enemies are starting to praise me, it’s only fair that my friends should go after me.’
The door again opened, and Gagnière glided in softly, like a will-o’-the-wisp. He had come straight from Melun, and was quite alone, for he never showed his wife to anybody. When he thus came to dinner he brought the country dust with him on his boots, and carried it back with him the same night on taking the last train. On the other hand, he did not alter; or, rather, age seemed to rejuvenate him; his complexion became fairer as he grew old.
The door opened again, and Gagnière slipped in quietly, like a ghost light. He had come straight from Melun and was all by himself because he never brought his wife around. When he came to dinner, he brought the dust of the countryside on his boots and took it back with him the same night on the last train. On the other hand, he didn’t change; or rather, aging seemed to make him look younger; his complexion got lighter as he got older.
‘Hallo! Why, Gagnière’s here!’ exclaimed Sandoz.
‘Hey! Look, Gagnière’s here!’ exclaimed Sandoz.
Then, just as Gagnière was making up his mind to bow to the ladies, Mahoudeau entered. He had already grown grey, with a sunken, fierce-looking face and childish, blinking eyes. He still wore trousers which were a good deal too short for him, and a frock-coat which creased in the back, in spite of the money which he now earned; for the bronze manufacturer for whom he worked had brought out some charming statuettes of his, which one began to see on middle-class mantel-shelves and consoles.
Then, just as Gagnière was deciding to bow to the ladies, Mahoudeau walked in. He had already turned grey, with a hollow, fierce-looking face and childish, blinking eyes. He still wore pants that were way too short for him, and a frock coat that creased in the back, despite the money he was now making; because the bronze manufacturer he worked for had released some beautiful statuettes of his, which had started appearing on the mantelpieces and consoles of middle-class homes.
Sandoz and Claude had turned round, inquisitive to witness the meeting between Mahoudeau and Mathilde. However, matters passed off very quietly. The sculptor bowed to her respectfully, while Jory, the husband, with his air of serene unconsciousness, thought fit to introduce her to him, for the twentieth time, perhaps.
Sandoz and Claude turned around, curious to see the interaction between Mahoudeau and Mathilde. However, everything went very smoothly. The sculptor respectfully bowed to her, while Jory, her husband, with his calm and unbothered demeanor, decided it was appropriate to introduce her to him for the twentieth time, maybe.
‘Eh! It’s my wife, old fellow. Shake hands together.’
‘Hey! It’s my wife, buddy. Let’s shake hands.’
Thereupon, both very grave, like people of society who are forced somewhat over-promptly into familiarity, Mathilde and Mahoudeau shook hands. Only, as soon as the latter had got rid of the job and had found Gagnière in a corner of the drawing-room, they both began sneering and recalling, in terrible language, all the abominations of yore.
Thereupon, both looking serious, like people from society who are somewhat awkwardly thrust into familiarity, Mathilde and Mahoudeau shook hands. However, as soon as Mahoudeau was done with the task and found Gagnière in a corner of the living room, they both started mocking and recalling, in harsh terms, all the horrors of the past.
Dubuche was expected that evening, for he had formally promised to come.
Dubuche was expected that evening because he had officially promised to come.
‘Yes,’ explained Henriette, ‘there will only be nine of us. Fagerolles wrote this morning to apologise; he is forced to go to some official dinner, but he hopes to escape, and will join us at about eleven o’clock.’
‘Yes,’ Henriette explained, ‘there will only be nine of us. Fagerolles wrote this morning to apologize; he has to go to some official dinner, but he hopes to make an escape and will join us around eleven o’clock.’
At that moment, however, a servant came in with a telegram. It was from Dubuche, who wired: ‘Impossible to stir. Alice has an alarming cough.’
At that moment, a servant walked in with a telegram. It was from Dubuche, who messaged: ‘Can't move. Alice has a bad cough.’
‘Well, we shall only be eight, then,’ resumed Henriette, with the somewhat peevish resignation of a hostess disappointed by her guests.
‘Well, we’ll only be eight, then,’ Henriette said again, with the slightly annoyed acceptance of a hostess let down by her guests.
And the servant having opened the dining-room door and announced that dinner was ready, she added:
And the servant opened the dining-room door and announced that dinner was ready, she added:
‘We are all here. Claude, offer me your arm.’
‘We’re all here. Claude, give me your arm.’
Sandoz took Mathilde’s, Jory charged himself with Christine, while Mahoudeau and Gagnière brought up the rear, still joking coarsely about what they called the beautiful herbalist’s padding.
Sandoz took Mathilde’s, Jory took on Christine, while Mahoudeau and Gagnière followed behind, still making crude jokes about what they referred to as the lovely herbalist’s padding.
The dining-room which they now entered was very spacious, and the light was gaily bright after the subdued illumination of the drawing-room. The walls, covered with specimens of old earthenware, displayed a gay medley of colours, reminding one of cheap coloured prints. Two sideboards, one laden with glass and the other with silver plate, sparkled like jewellers’ show-cases. And in the centre of the room, under the big hanging lamp girt round with tapers, the table glistened like a catafalque with the whiteness of its cloth, laid in perfect style, with decorated plates, cut-glass decanters white with water or ruddy with wine, and symmetrical side-dishes, all set out around the centre-piece, a silver basket full of purple roses.
The dining room they entered was very spacious, and the light was bright and cheerful after the dim lighting of the living room. The walls, covered with old pottery, showcased a colorful array that reminded one of cheap, colorful prints. Two sideboards, one stocked with glass and the other with silverware, sparkled like jewelry displays. In the middle of the room, beneath the large hanging lamp surrounded by candles, the table shone like a catafalque with its crisp white cloth, arranged perfectly with decorative plates, cut-glass decanters filled with clear water or rich wine, and neatly arranged side dishes, all centered around a silver basket filled with purple roses.
They sat down, Henriette between Claude and Mahoudeau, Sandoz with Mathilde and Christine beside him, Jory and Gagnière at either end; and the servant had barely finished serving the soup, when Madame Jory made a most unfortunate remark. Wishing to show herself amiable, and not having heard her husband’s apologies, she said to the master of the house:
They took their seats, with Henriette between Claude and Mahoudeau, Sandoz next to Mathilde and Christine beside him, and Jory and Gagnière at either end; just as the servant finished serving the soup, Madame Jory made a really awkward comment. Trying to be friendly and not having caught her husband’s apologies, she turned to the host and said:
‘Well, were you pleased with the article in this morning’s number? Edouard personally revised the proofs with the greatest care!’
‘So, were you happy with the article in this morning’s issue? Edouard personally reviewed the proofs with a lot of attention!’
On hearing this, Jory became very much confused and stammered:
On hearing this, Jory became really confused and stammered:
‘No, no! you are mistaken! It was a very bad article indeed, and you know very well that it was “passed” the other evening while I was away.’
‘No, no! You’re wrong! It was a really terrible article, and you know perfectly well that it was “approved” the other night while I was gone.’
By the silent embarrassment which ensued she guessed her blunder. But she made matters still worse, for, giving her husband a sharp glance, she retorted in a very loud voice, so as to crush him, as it were, and disengage her own responsibility:
By the awkward silence that followed, she realized her mistake. But she only made things worse; giving her husband a sharp look, she replied in a loud voice, as if to overpower him and shake off her own responsibility:
‘Another of your lies! I repeat what you told me. I won’t allow you to make me ridiculous, do you hear?’
‘Another one of your lies! I'm repeating what you said to me. I won’t let you make me look ridiculous, do you understand?’
This threw a chill over the beginning of the dinner. Henriette recommended the kilkis, but Christine alone found them very nice. When the grilled mullet appeared, Sandoz, who was amused by Jory’s embarrassment, gaily reminded him of a lunch they had had together at Marseilles in the old days. Ah! Marseilles, the only city where people know how to eat!
This put a damper on the start of the dinner. Henriette suggested the kilkis, but only Christine thought they were really good. When the grilled mullet arrived, Sandoz, who found Jory’s awkwardness entertaining, cheerfully brought up a lunch they had together in Marseilles back in the day. Ah! Marseilles, the only city where people know how to really enjoy food!
Claude, who for a little while had been absorbed in thought, now seemed to awaken from a dream, and without any transition he asked:
Claude, who had been lost in thought for a bit, now seemed to snap out of a dream and, without any pause, asked:
‘Is it decided? Have they selected the artists for the new decorations of the Hôtel de Ville?’
‘Is it decided? Have they chosen the artists for the new decorations of the Hôtel de Ville?’
‘No,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘they are going to do so. I sha’n’t get anything, for I don’t know anybody. Fagerolles himself is very anxious. If he isn’t here to-night, it’s because matters are not going smoothly. Ah! he has had his bite at the cherry; all that painting for millions is cracking to bits!’
‘No,’ said Mahoudeau, ‘they will do that. I won’t get anything because I don’t know anyone. Fagerolles himself is really nervous. If he’s not here tonight, it’s because things aren't going well. Ah! he got his chance; all that painting for millions is falling apart!’
There was a laugh, expressive of spite finally satisfied, and even Gagnière at the other end of the table joined in the sneering. Then they eased their feelings in malicious words, and rejoiced over the sudden fall of prices which had thrown the world of ‘young masters’ into consternation. It was inevitable, the predicted time was coming, the exaggerated rise was about to finish in a catastrophe. Since the amateurs had been panic-stricken, seized with consternation like that of speculators when a ‘slump’ sweeps over a Stock Exchange, prices were giving way day by day, and nothing more was sold. It was a sight to see the famous Naudet amid the rout; he had held out at first, he had invented ‘the dodge of the Yankee’—the unique picture hidden deep in some gallery, in solitude like an idol—the picture of which he would not name the price, being contemptuously certain that he could never find a man rich enough to purchase it, but which he finally sold for two or three hundred thousand francs to some pig-dealer of Chicago, who felt glorious at carrying off the most expensive canvas of the year. But those fine strokes of business were not to be renewed at present, and Naudet, whose expenditure had increased with his gains, drawn on and swallowed up in the mad craze which was his own work, could now hear his regal mansion crumbling beneath him, and was reduced to defend it against the assault of creditors.
There was a laugh filled with spite that finally felt fulfilled, and even Gagnière at the other end of the table joined in the mockery. Then they let out their feelings in hurtful words, celebrating the sudden drop in prices that had thrown the world of 'young masters' into chaos. It was inevitable; the anticipated time was coming, and the inflated prices were about to end in disaster. Since the amateurs had panicked, gripped by the same fear as speculators when a 'slump' hits a Stock Exchange, prices were dropping day by day, and nothing was selling anymore. It was something to see the famous Naudet caught up in the chaos; he had held out at first, coming up with 'the Yankee trick'—the unique artwork hidden deep in some gallery, alone like an idol—the artwork for which he wouldn’t reveal the price, arrogantly sure he could never find a buyer rich enough, but he eventually sold it for two or three hundred thousand francs to some pig-dealer from Chicago, who felt proud to take home the most expensive piece of the year. But those clever business moves were not happening now, and Naudet, whose spending had increased along with his earnings, was now engulfed in the madness he had created. He could hear his lavish mansion crumbling around him and was left to fend it off against the onslaught of creditors.
‘Won’t you take some more mushrooms, Mahoudeau?’ obligingly interrupted Henriette.
“Would you like some more mushrooms, Mahoudeau?” Henriette readily interrupted.
The servant was now handing round the undercut. They ate, and emptied the decanters; but their bitterness was so great that the best things were offered without being tasted, which distressed the master and mistress of the house.
The servant was now passing around the undercut. They ate and drained the decanters; but their bitterness was so strong that the best dishes were offered without being touched, which upset the hosts.
‘Mushrooms, eh?’ the sculptor ended by repeating. ‘No, thanks.’ And he added: ‘The funny part of it all is, that Naudet is suing Fagerolles. Oh, quite so! he’s going to distrain on him. Ah! it makes me laugh! We shall see a pretty scouring in the Avenue de Villiers among all those petty painters with mansions of their own. House property will go for nothing next spring! Well, Naudet, who had compelled Fagerolles to build a house, and who furnished it for him as he would have furnished a place for a hussy, wanted to get hold of his nick-nacks and hangings again. But Fagerolles had borrowed money on them, so it seems. You can imagine the state of affairs; the dealer accuses the artist of having spoilt his game by exhibiting with the vanity of a giddy fool; while the painter replies that he doesn’t mean to be robbed any longer; and they’ll end by devouring each other—at least, I hope so.’
‘Mushrooms, right?’ the sculptor repeated. ‘No, thanks.’ Then he added: ‘The funny part is that Naudet is suing Fagerolles. Oh, absolutely! He’s going to take legal action against him. Ah! It's hilarious! We’ll see quite a scene in the Avenue de Villiers with all those small-time painters who have their own fancy homes. Property values are going to drop next spring! So Naudet, who forced Fagerolles to build a house and furnished it as if he were setting up a place for a mistress, wants to reclaim his decorations and furnishings. But it turns out Fagerolles borrowed money against them. You can imagine the situation; the dealer accuses the artist of ruining his chances by showing off like a clueless fool; while the painter insists he won’t be robbed anymore; and they’ll end up destroying each other—at least, I hope so.’
Gagnière raised his voice, the gentle but inexorable voice of a dreamer just awakened.
Gagnière raised his voice, the calm but relentless tone of a dreamer who has just woken up.
‘Fagerolles is done for. Besides, he never had any success.’
‘Fagerolles is finished. Besides, he never found any success.’
The others protested. Well, what about the hundred thousand francs’ worth of pictures he had sold a year, and his medals and his cross of the Legion of Honour? But Gagnière, still obstinate, smiled with a mysterious air, as if facts could not prevail against his inner conviction. He wagged his head and, full of disdain, replied:
The others protested. "Well, what about the hundred thousand francs' worth of paintings he sold every year, and his medals and his Legion of Honour cross?" But Gagnière, still stubborn, smiled with a mysterious look, as if facts couldn’t sway his deep belief. He shook his head and, filled with disdain, replied:
‘Let me be! He never knew anything about chiaroscuro.’
‘Leave me alone! He never understood anything about light and shadow.’
Jory was about to defend the talent of Fagerolles, whom he considered to be his own creation, when Henriette solicited a little attention for the raviolis. There was a short slackening of the quarrel amid the crystalline clinking of the glasses and the light clatter of the forks. The table, laid with such fine symmetry, was already in confusion, and seemed to sparkle still more amid the ardent fire of the quarrel. And Sandoz, growing anxious, felt astonished. What was the matter with them all that they attacked Fagerolles so harshly? Hadn’t they all begun together, and were they not all to reach the goal in the same victory? For the first time, a feeling of uneasiness disturbed his dream of eternity, that delight in his Thursdays, which he had pictured following one upon another, all alike, all of them happy ones, into the far distance of the future. But the feeling was as yet only skin deep, and he laughingly exclaimed:
Jory was about to defend Fagerolles’ talent, which he saw as his own creation, when Henriette asked for a little attention for the raviolis. There was a brief pause in the argument amid the clear clinking of glasses and the soft clatter of forks. The table, set up in such fine symmetry, was already a bit disordered, and seemed to sparkle even more in the heated atmosphere of the debate. Sandoz, feeling anxious, was astonished. What was going on with everyone that they were so harshly criticizing Fagerolles? Hadn’t they all started together, and weren’t they all supposed to achieve success as one? For the first time, a sense of unease disrupted his vision of eternity, that joy in his Thursdays, which he had imagined would follow one after another, all the same, all happy, stretching far into the future. But the feeling was still surface-level, and he laughed as he exclaimed:
‘Husband your strength, Claude, here are the hazel-hens. Eh! Claude, where are you?’
‘Save your strength, Claude, here are the hazel-hens. Hey! Claude, where are you?’
Since silence had prevailed, Claude had relapsed into his dream, gazing about him vacantly, and taking a second help of raviolis without knowing what he was about; Christine, who said nothing, but sat there looking sad and charming, did not take her eyes off him. He started when Sandoz spoke, and chose a leg from amid the bits of hazel-hen now being served, the strong fumes of which filled the room with a resinous smell.
Since silence had fallen, Claude had drifted back into his thoughts, staring blankly around the room and serving himself another helping of ravioli without really paying attention. Christine, who said nothing but looked both sad and lovely, couldn't take her eyes off him. He jumped when Sandoz spoke, then picked a leg from the pieces of hazel-hen being served, the strong aroma filling the room with a resinous scent.
‘Do you smell that?’ exclaimed Sandoz, amused; ‘one would think one were swallowing all the forests of Russia.’
‘Do you smell that?’ Sandoz said with a chuckle; ‘you’d think we were swallowing up all the forests of Russia.’
But Claude returned to the matter which worried him.
But Claude went back to the issue that was troubling him.
‘Then you say that Fagerolles will be entrusted with the paintings for the Municipal Council’s assembly room?’
‘So, you’re saying that Fagerolles will be in charge of the paintings for the Municipal Council’s assembly room?’
And this remark sufficed; Mahoudeau and Gagnière, set on the track, at once started off again. Ah! a nice wishy-washy smearing it would be if that assembly room were allotted to him; and he was doing plenty of dirty things to get it. He, who had formerly pretended to spit on orders for work, like a great artist surrounded by amateurs, was basely cringing to the officials, now that his pictures no longer sold. Could anything more despicable be imagined than a painter soliciting a functionary, bowing and scraping, showing all kinds of cowardice and making all kinds of concessions? It was shameful that art should be dependent upon a Minister’s idiotic good pleasure! Fagerolles, at that official dinner he had gone to, was no doubt conscientiously licking the boots of some chief clerk, some idiot who was only fit to be made a guy of.
And that comment was enough; Mahoudeau and Gagnière, on the right track, immediately started off again. Wow! It would really be a pathetic mess if that assembly room was given to him; and he was doing all sorts of shady things to make it happen. He, who used to act like he scoffed at assignments for work, like a top artist surrounded by amateurs, was now groveling to the officials since his paintings weren’t selling anymore. Could anything be more disgraceful than an artist begging a bureaucrat, bowing and scraping, showing all sorts of cowardice and making all kinds of compromises? It was embarrassing that art should rely on a Minister’s foolish whims! Fagerolles, at that official dinner he attended, was probably dutifully kissing up to some chief clerk, some fool who deserved to be mocked.
‘Well,’ said Jory, ‘he effects his purpose, and he’s quite right. You won’t pay his debts.’
'Well,' Jory said, 'he's achieving his goal, and he's completely right. You won't pay his debts.'
‘Debts? Have I any debts, I who have always starved?’ answered Mahoudeau in a roughly arrogant tone. ‘Ought a fellow to build himself a palace and spend money on creatures like that Irma Bécot, who’s ruining Fagerolles?’
‘Debts? Do I have any debts, I who have always gone without?’ Mahoudeau replied in a harshly arrogant tone. ‘Should a guy build himself a palace and spend money on people like that Irma Bécot, who’s messing up Fagerolles?’
At this Jory grew angry, while the others jested, and Irma’s name went flying over the table. But Mathilde, who had so far remained reserved and silent by way of making a show of good breeding, became intensely indignant. ‘Oh! gentlemen, oh! gentlemen,’ she exclaimed, ‘to talk before us about that creature. No, not that creature, I implore you!
At this, Jory got angry while the others joked around, and Irma’s name was thrown around the table. But Mathilde, who had been quiet and reserved to show her good manners, became extremely upset. “Oh! Gentlemen, oh! Gentlemen,” she exclaimed, “please don’t talk about that person in front of us. No, not that person, I beg you!”
After that Henriette and Sandoz, who were in consternation, witnessed the rout of their menu. The truffle salad, the ice, the dessert, everything was swallowed without being at all appreciated amidst the rising anger of the quarrel; and the chambertin and sparkling moselle were imbibed as if they had merely been water. In vain did Henriette smile, while Sandoz good-naturedly tried to calm them by making allowances for human weakness. Not one of them retreated from his position; a single word made them spring upon each other. There was none of the vague boredom, the somniferous satiety which at times had saddened their old gatherings; at present there was real ferocity in the struggle, a longing to destroy one another. The tapers of the hanging lamp flared up, the painted flowers of the earthenware on the walls bloomed, the table seemed to have caught fire amid the upsetting of its symmetrical arrangements and the violence of the talk, that demolishing onslaught of chatter which had filled them with fever for a couple of hours past.
After that, Henriette and Sandoz, both in shock, watched as their meal was completely devoured. The truffle salad, the ice cream, the dessert—everything was consumed without any appreciation amidst the rising anger of the argument; the chambertin and sparkling moselle were downed as if they were just water. Henriette tried to smile in vain while Sandoz, in a friendly way, attempted to calm them down by making excuses for human flaws. Not one of them backed down; a single word sent them jumping at each other. There was none of the vague boredom or dullness that had sometimes overshadowed their old gatherings; now there was genuine ferocity in the conflict, a desire to destroy one another. The candles on the hanging lamp flickered, the painted flowers on the walls seemed to come alive, and the table appeared to be on fire with its upset arrangements and the intensity of the conversation, that overwhelming flood of chatter that had filled them with tension for the past couple of hours.
And amid the racket, when Henriette made up her mind to rise so as to silence them, Claude at length remarked:
And in the middle of the noise, when Henriette decided to stand up to quiet them, Claude finally said:
‘Ah! if I only had the Hôtel de Ville work, and if I could! It used to be my dream to cover all the walls of Paris!’
‘Ah! if I just had the Hôtel de Ville job, and if I could! It used to be my dream to cover all the walls of Paris!’
They returned to the drawing-room, where the little chandelier and the bracket-candelabra had just been lighted. It seemed almost cold there in comparison with the kind of hot-house which had just been left; and for a moment the coffee calmed the guests. Nobody beyond Fagerolles was expected. The house was not an open one by any means, the Sandozes did not recruit literary dependents or muzzle the press by dint of invitations. The wife detested society, and the husband said with a laugh that he needed ten years to take a liking to anybody, and then he must like him always. But was not that real happiness, seldom realised? A few sound friendships and a nook full of family affection. No music was ever played there, and nobody had ever read a page of his composition aloud.
They returned to the living room, where the small chandelier and the wall sconces had just been lit. It felt almost chilly compared to the greenhouse atmosphere they had just left; for a moment, the coffee settled the guests. No one beyond Fagerolles was expected. The house wasn't open to everyone, as the Sandozes didn’t invite literary hangers-on or try to control the press through invitations. The wife hated socializing, and the husband joked that he needed ten years to warm up to anyone, and then he had to like them forever. But wasn’t that true happiness, though rarely found? A few genuine friendships and a cozy space filled with family love. No music was ever played there, and no one had ever read a page of his writing aloud.
On that particular Thursday the evening seemed a long one, on account of the persistent irritation of the men. The ladies had begun to chat before the smouldering fire; and when the servant, after clearing the table, reopened the door of the dining-room, they were left alone, the men repairing to the adjoining apartment to smoke and sip some beer.
On that Thursday, the evening felt really long because the men were being annoying. The ladies had started chatting in front of the warm fire; and when the servant finished clearing the table and opened the dining-room door again, they were left alone while the men went to the next room to smoke and sip some beer.
Sandoz and Claude, who were not smokers, soon returned, however, and sat down, side by side, on a sofa near the doorway. The former, who was glad to see his old friend excited and talkative, recalled the memories of Plassans apropos of a bit of news he had learnt the previous day. Pouillaud, the old jester of their dormitory, who had become so grave a lawyer, was now in trouble over some adventure with a woman. Ah! that brute of a Pouillaud! But Claude did not answer, for, having heard his name mentioned in the dining-room, he listened attentively, trying to understand.
Sandoz and Claude, neither of whom smoked, soon came back and sat down next to each other on a sofa by the doorway. Sandoz, happy to see his old friend lively and chatty, remembered some stories from Plassans related to a piece of news he had learned the day before. Pouillaud, their old joker from the dorm, who had grown into such a serious lawyer, was now in hot water due to some incident involving a woman. Ah, that jerk Pouillaud! But Claude didn't reply; he had heard his name mentioned in the dining room and was listening closely, trying to make sense of it.
Jory, Mahoudeau, and Gagnière, unsatiated and eager for another bite, had started on the massacre again. Their voices, at first mere whispers, gradually grew louder, till at last they began to shout.
Jory, Mahoudeau, and Gagnière, still hungry and ready for another bite, had started the slaughter again. Their voices, initially just whispers, slowly got louder until they finally began to shout.
‘Oh! the man, I abandon the man to you,’ said Jory, who was speaking of Fagerolles. ‘He isn’t worth much. And he out-generalled you, it’s true. Ah! how he did get the better of you fellows, by breaking off from you and carving success for himself on your backs! You were certainly not at all cute.’
‘Oh! the guy, I leave him to you,’ said Jory, referring to Fagerolles. ‘He’s not worth much. And it's true, he outsmarted you. Ah! how he managed to get ahead of you guys by stepping away from you and carving out his own success at your expense! You definitely weren’t very clever.’
Mahoudeau, waxing furious, replied:
Mahoudeau, getting furious, replied:
‘Of course! It sufficed for us to be with Claude, to be turned away everywhere.’
‘Of course! It was enough for us to be with Claude, to be rejected everywhere.’
‘It was Claude who did for us!’ so Gagnière squarely asserted.
'It was Claude who did it for us!' Gagnière declared confidently.
And thus they went on, relinquishing Fagerolles, whom they reproached for toadying the newspapers, for allying himself with their enemies and wheedling sexagenarian baronesses, to fall upon Claude, who now became the great culprit. Well, after all, the other was only a hussy, one of the many found in the artistic fraternity, fellows who accost the public at street corners, leave their comrades in the lurch, and victimise them so as to get the bourgeois into their studios. But Claude, that abortive great artist, that impotent fellow who couldn’t set a figure on its legs in spite of all his pride, hadn’t he utterly compromised them, hadn’t he let them in altogether? Ah! yes, success might have been won by breaking off. If they had been able to begin over again, they wouldn’t have been idiots enough to cling obstinately to impossible principles! And they accused Claude of having paralysed them, of having traded on them—yes, traded on them, but in so clumsy and dull-witted a manner that he himself had not derived any benefit by it.
And so they moved on, blaming Fagerolles for sucking up to the newspapers, for teaming up with their enemies and sweet-talking older baronesses, then turning against Claude, who became the main target of their anger. After all, the other guy was just a floozy, one of many in the artistic scene, people who approach the public on street corners, abandon their friends, and take advantage of them to lure the bourgeois into their studios. But Claude, that failed great artist, that useless guy who couldn’t even get a figure to stand on its own despite all his pride, hadn’t he completely compromised them, hadn’t he let them down entirely? Yes, success could have been achieved by walking away. If they could start over, they wouldn’t have been foolish enough to stubbornly cling to impossible ideals! And they blamed Claude for paralyzing them, for taking advantage of them—yes, taking advantage, but in such an awkward and clueless way that he himself didn't gain anything from it.
‘Why, as for me,’ resumed Mahoudeau, ‘didn’t he make me quite idiotic at one moment? When I think of it, I sound myself, and remain wondering why I ever joined his band. Am I at all like him? Was there ever any one thing in common between us, eh? Ah! it’s exasperating to find the truth out so late in the day!’
‘Why, for me,’ Mahoudeau continued, ‘didn’t he make me feel completely foolish at one point? When I think about it, I reflect on myself and can’t help but wonder why I ever joined his crew. Am I anything like him? Was there ever anything we had in common, huh? Ah! It’s so frustrating to discover the truth so late!’
‘And as for myself,’ said Gagnière, ‘he robbed me of my originality. Do you think it has amused me, each time I have exhibited a painting during the last fifteen years, to hear people saying behind me, “That’s a Claude!” Oh! I’ve had enough of it, I prefer not to paint any more. All the same, if I had seen clearly in former times, I shouldn’t have associated with him.’
‘And as for me,’ said Gagnière, ‘he stole my originality. Do you think it’s been fun for me to hear people say behind my back every time I’ve shown a painting in the last fifteen years, “That’s a Claude!” Oh! I’ve had enough of it; I’d rather not paint anymore. Still, if I had seen things more clearly back then, I wouldn’t have gotten involved with him.’
It was a stampede, the snapping of the last ties, in their stupefaction at suddenly finding that they were strangers and enemies, after a long youth of fraternity together. Life had disbanded them on the road, and the great dissimilarity of their characters stood revealed; all that remained in them was the bitterness left by the old enthusiastic dream, that erstwhile hope of battle and victory to be won side by side, which now increased their spite.
It was a stampede, the breaking of their final bonds, as they were shocked to suddenly find themselves as strangers and enemies after a long youth spent together in brotherhood. Life had separated them along the way, and the vast differences in their personalities became clear; all that was left in them was the bitterness from that old passionate dream, the once hopeful idea of fighting and winning together, which now only fueled their resentment.
‘The fact is,’ sneered Jory, ‘that Fagerolles did not let himself be pillaged like a simpleton.’
‘The fact is,’ Jory sneered, ‘that Fagerolles didn’t let himself be robbed like a fool.’
But Mahoudeau, feeling vexed, became angry. ‘You do wrong to laugh,’ he said, ‘for you are a nice backslider yourself. Yes, you always told us that you would give us a lift up when you had a paper of your own.’
But Mahoudeau, feeling irritated, got angry. “You shouldn't laugh,” he said, “because you’re quite the hypocrite yourself. Yes, you always promised us that you would help us out once you had your own paper.”
‘Ah! allow me, allow me—’
"Ah! let me, let me—"
Gagnière, however, united with Mahoudeau: ‘That’s quite true!’ he said. ‘You can’t say any more that what you write about us is cut out, for you are the master now. And yet, never a word! You didn’t even name us in your articles on the last Salon.’
Gagnière, however, joined in with Mahoudeau: ‘That’s totally true!’ he said. ‘You can’t claim that what you write about us is limited, because you’re the master now. And still, not a word! You didn’t even mention us in your articles about the last Salon.’
Then Jory, embarrassed and stammering, in his turn flew into a rage.
Then Jory, feeling embarrassed and stammering, got really angry in response.
‘Ah! well, it’s the fault of that cursed Claude! I don’t care to lose my subscribers simply to please you fellows. It’s impossible to do anything for you! There! do you understand? You, Mahoudeau, may wear yourself out in producing pretty little things; you, Gagnière, may even never do anything more; but you each have a label on the back, and you’ll need ten years’ efforts before you’ll be able to get it off. In fact, there have been some labels that would never come off! The public is amused by it, you know; there were only you fellows to believe in the genius of that big ridiculous lunatic, who will be locked up in a madhouse one of these fine mornings!’
‘Ah! well, it’s that damned Claude’s fault! I’m not about to lose my subscribers just to please you guys. It’s impossible to do anything for you! There! Do you get it? You, Mahoudeau, can exhaust yourself making pretty little things; you, Gagnière, might not even create anything else; but you both have a label on your back, and it'll take you ten years of hard work to get it off. In fact, some labels never come off! The public finds it entertaining, you know; only you guys believed in the genius of that big ridiculous lunatic, who’s going to end up locked in a madhouse one of these days!’
Then the dispute became terrible, they all three spoke at once, coming at last to abominable reproaches, with such outbursts, and such furious motion of the jaw, that they seemed to be biting one another.
Then the argument got intense; they all three talked over each other, eventually launching into horrible accusations, with such outbursts and such furious jaw movements that it looked like they were trying to bite each other.
Sandoz, seated on the sofa, and disturbed in the gay memories he was recalling, was at last obliged to lend ear to the tumult which reached him through the open doorway.
Sandoz, sitting on the sofa and interrupted from the happy memories he was thinking about, finally had to listen to the noise coming through the open doorway.
‘You hear them?’ whispered Claude, with a dolorous smile; ‘they are giving it me nicely! No, no, stay here, I won’t let you stop them; I deserve it, since I have failed to succeed.’
‘Do you hear them?’ whispered Claude, with a sad smile; ‘they’re giving it to me good! No, no, stay here, I won’t let you stop them; I deserve it, since I haven’t managed to succeed.’
And Sandoz, turning pale, remained there, listening to that bitter quarrelling, the outcome of the struggle for life, that grappling of conflicting personalities, which bore all his chimera of everlasting friendship away.
And Sandoz, turning pale, stayed there, listening to that bitter arguing, the result of the struggle for survival, that clash of opposing personalities, which swept away all his illusions of lasting friendship.
Henriette, fortunately, became anxious on hearing the violent shouting. She rose and went to shame the smokers for thus forsaking the ladies to go and quarrel together. They then returned to the drawing-room, perspiring, breathing hard, and still shaken by their anger. And as Henriette, with her eyes on the clock, remarked that they certainly would not see Fagerolles that evening, they, began to sneer again, exchanging glances. Ah! he had a fine scent, and no mistake; he wouldn’t be caught associating with old friends, who had become troublesome, and whom he hated.
Henriette, thankfully, felt anxious when she heard the loud shouting. She stood up and went to confront the smokers for abandoning the ladies to argue among themselves. They returned to the living room, sweating, out of breath, and still rattled by their anger. As Henriette watched the clock and noted that they definitely wouldn't be seeing Fagerolles that evening, they started sneering again, exchanging knowing looks. Ah! He had a great sense for these things, no doubt about it; he wouldn't be caught hanging out with old friends who had become a hassle and whom he disliked.
In fact, Fagerolles did not come. The evening finished laboriously. They once more went back to the dining-room, where the tea was served on a Russian tablecloth embroidered with a stag-hunt in red thread; and under the tapers a plain cake was displayed, with plates full of sweetstuff and pastry, and a barbarous collection of liqueurs and spirits, whisky, hollands, Chio raki, and kummel. The servant also brought some punch, and bestirred himself round the table, while the mistress of the house filled the teapot from the samovar boiling in front of her. But all the comfort, all the feast for the eyes and the fine perfume of the tea did not move their hearts. The conversation again turned on the success that some men achieved and the ill-luck that befell others. For instance, was it not shameful that art should be dishonoured by all those medals, all those crosses, all those rewards, which were so badly distributed to boot? Were artists always to remain like little boys at school? All the universal platitude came from the docility and cowardice which were shown, as in the presence of ushers, so as to obtain good marks.
In fact, Fagerolles didn’t show up. The evening dragged on. They went back to the dining room, where tea was served on a Russian tablecloth embroidered with a stag hunt in red thread. Under the candles, there was a simple cake, along with plates of sweets and pastries, and a wild assortment of liqueurs and spirits—whisky, gin, Chio raki, and kummel. The waiter also brought some punch and moved around the table while the hostess filled the teapot from the samovar boiling in front of her. But all the comfort, the visual feast, and the lovely aroma of the tea didn’t warm their hearts. The conversation turned again to the success some men achieved and the bad luck that fell on others. For example, wasn’t it disgraceful that art was tarnished by all those medals, crosses, and rewards, which were distributed so poorly? Were artists always going to be treated like schoolboys? All the universal clichés came from the submissiveness and fear displayed, as if in front of teachers, just to get good grades.
They had repaired to the drawing-room once more, and Sandoz, who was greatly distressed, had begun to wish that they would take themselves off, when he noticed Mathilde and Gagnière seated side by side on a sofa and talking languishingly of music, while the others remained exhausted, lacking saliva and power of speech. Gagnière philosophised and poetised in a state of ecstasy, while Mathilde rolled up her eyes and went into raptures as if titillated by some invisible wing. They had caught sight of each other on the previous Sunday at the concert at the Cirque, and they apprised each other of their enjoyment in alternate, far-soaring sentences.
They had gone back to the living room again, and Sandoz, feeling very upset, started wishing they would leave, when he noticed Mathilde and Gagnière sitting side by side on a sofa, talking dreamily about music, while the others remained exhausted, lacking energy and words. Gagnière was philosophizing and waxing poetic in a state of bliss, while Mathilde rolled her eyes and seemed to be in ecstasy as if touched by an invisible force. They had seen each other the previous Sunday at the concert at the Cirque and were sharing their enjoyment in alternate, soaring sentences.
‘Ah! that Meyerbeer, monsieur, the overture of “Struensee,” that funereal strain, and then that peasant dance, so full of dash and colour; and then the mournful burden which returns, the duo of the violoncellos. Ah! monsieur, the violoncellos, the violoncellos!’
‘Ah! That Meyerbeer, sir, the overture of “Struensee,” that mournful melody, and then that lively peasant dance, so full of energy and vibrancy; and then the sad theme that comes back, the duet of the cellos. Ah! Sir, the cellos, the cellos!’
‘And Berlioz, madame, the festival air in “Romeo.” Oh! the solo of the clarionets, the beloved women, with the harp accompaniment! Something enrapturing, something white as snow which ascends! The festival bursts upon you, like a picture by Paul Veronese, with the tumultuous magnificence of the “Marriage of Cana”; and then the love-song begins again, oh, how softly! Oh! always higher! higher still—’
‘And Berlioz, ma’am, the festive vibe in “Romeo.” Oh! The solo of the clarinets, the beloved women, with the harp backing! Something captivating, something pure as snow that rises! The celebration hits you like a painting by Paul Veronese, with the overwhelming grandeur of the “Marriage of Cana”; and then the love song starts again, oh, how softly! Oh! Always higher! Higher still—’
‘Did you notice, monsieur, in Beethoven’s Symphony in A, that knell which ever and ever comes back and beats upon your heart? Yes, I see very well, you feel as I do, music is a communion—Beethoven, ah, me! how sad and sweet it is to be two to understand him and give way—’
‘Did you notice, sir, in Beethoven’s Symphony in A, that tolling sound that keeps coming back and hits your heart? Yes, I can see it clearly, you feel like I do, music is a connection—Beethoven, oh, how bittersweet it is to be two people who can understand him and let go—’
‘And Schumann, madame, and Wagner, madame—Schumann’s “Reverie,” nothing but the stringed instruments, a warm shower falling on acacia leaves, a sunray which dries them, barely a tear in space. Wagner! ah, Wagner! the overture of the “Flying Dutchman,” are you not fond of it?—tell me you are fond of it! As for myself, it overcomes me. There is nothing left, nothing left, one expires—’
‘And Schumann, ma'am, and Wagner, ma'am—Schumann’s “Reverie,” just the string instruments, a warm shower falling on acacia leaves, a sunbeam drying them, barely a tear in the air. Wagner! Ah, Wagner! The overture of the “Flying Dutchman,” don’t you love it?—tell me you love it! As for me, it overwhelms me. There’s nothing left, nothing left, one just fades away—’
Their voices died away; they did not even look at each other, but sat there elbow to elbow, with their faces turned upward, quite overcome.
Their voices faded; they didn't even glance at one another, but sat there side by side, their faces turned upward, completely overwhelmed.
Sandoz, who was surprised, asked himself where Mathilde could have picked up that jargon. In some article of Jory’s, perhaps. Besides, he had remarked that women talk music very well, even without knowing a note of it. And he, whom the bitterness of the others had only grieved, became exasperated at sight of Mathilde’s languishing attitude. No, no, that was quite enough; the men tore each other to bits; still that might pass, after all; but what an end to the evening it was, that feminine fraud, cooing and titillating herself with thoughts of Beethoven’s and Schumann’s music! Fortunately, Gagnière suddenly rose. He knew what o’clock it was even in the depths of his ecstasy, and he had only just time left him to catch his last train. So, after exchanging nerveless and silent handshakes with the others, he went off to sleep at Melun.
Sandoz, surprised, wondered where Mathilde could have learned that lingo. Maybe from some article by Jory. He had also noticed that women talk about music very well, even if they don't know a thing about it. And he, who had only felt hurt by the bitterness of others, became annoyed at the sight of Mathilde’s dreamy demeanor. No, that was definitely enough; the men were tearing each other apart, which could be tolerated, but what a way to end the evening—with that feminine pretense, cooing and getting lost in thoughts of Beethoven and Schumann! Luckily, Gagnière suddenly stood up. He knew what time it was, even in his state of bliss, and he barely had time to catch his last train. After giving the others a quick, limp handshake, he set off to sleep in Melun.
‘What a failure he is!’ muttered Mahoudeau. ‘Music has killed painting; he’ll never do anything!’
‘What a failure he is!’ muttered Mahoudeau. ‘Music has killed painting; he’ll never accomplish anything!’
He himself had to leave, and the door had scarcely closed behind his back when Jory declared:
He had to leave, and the door had barely closed when Jory said:
‘Have you seen his last paperweight? He’ll end by sculpturing sleeve-links. There’s a fellow who has missed his mark! To think that he prided himself on being vigorous!’
‘Have you seen his latest paperweight? He’s going to end up making cufflinks. What a guy who has completely missed the point! Can you believe he used to take so much pride in being active!’
But Mathilde was already afoot, taking leave of Christine with a curt little inclination of the head, affecting social familiarity with Henriette, and carrying off her husband, who helped her on with her cloak in the ante-room, humble and terrified at the severe glance she gave him, for she had an account to settle.
But Mathilde was already up, saying goodbye to Christine with a quick nod, trying to act friendly with Henriette, and leading her husband away, who helped her with her cloak in the foyer, feeling small and scared at the harsh look she gave him because she had a score to settle.
Then, the door having closed behind them, Sandoz, beside himself, cried out: ‘That’s the end! The journalist was bound to call the others abortions—yes, the journalist who, after patching up articles, has fallen to trading upon public credulity! Ah! luckily there’s Mathilde the Avengeress!’
Then, after the door shut behind them, Sandoz, overwhelmed, shouted: ‘That’s it! The journalist was definitely going to call the others worthless—yes, the journalist who, after fixing up articles, has resorted to exploiting public gullibility! Ah! thankfully there’s Mathilde the Avenger!’
Of the guests Christine and Claude alone were left. The latter, since the drawing-room had been growing empty, had remained ensconced in the depths of an arm-chair, no longer speaking, but overcome by that species of magnetic slumber which stiffened him, and fixed his eyes on something far away beyond the walls. He protruded his face, a convulsive kind of attention seemed to carry it forward; he certainly beheld something invisible, and heard a summons in the silence.
Of all the guests, only Christine and Claude were left. Since the drawing room had started to empty out, Claude had settled deeply into an armchair, no longer talking but caught in a kind of magnetic daze that made him stiff and fixed his gaze on something far away beyond the walls. He leaned forward, a twitchy kind of focus making him look attentive; it was clear he was seeing something invisible and hearing a call in the silence.
Christine having risen in her turn, and apologised for being the last to leave, Henriette took hold of her hands, repeated how fond she was of her, begged her to come and see her frequently, and to dispose of her in all things as she would with a sister. But Claude’s sorrowful wife, looking so sadly charming in her black dress, shook her head with a pale smile.
Christine, having gotten up in her turn and apologized for being the last to leave, Henriette took her hands, expressed how much she cared for her, and urged her to visit often, treating her in every way as she would a sister. But Claude’s grief-stricken wife, looking sadly beautiful in her black dress, shook her head with a faint smile.
‘Come,’ said Sandoz in her ear, after giving a glance at Claude, ‘you mustn’t distress yourself like that. He has talked a great deal, he has been gayer this evening. He’s all right.’
‘Come,’ Sandoz said softly in her ear, after glancing at Claude, ‘you shouldn’t upset yourself like that. He’s talked a lot, he’s been happier this evening. He’s fine.’
But in a terrified voice she answered:
But in a scared voice, she replied:
‘No, no; look at his eyes—I shall tremble as long as he has his eyes like that. You have done all you could, thanks. What you haven’t done no one will do. Ah! how I suffer at being unable to hope, at being unable to do anything!’
‘No, no; look at his eyes—I’ll be shaking as long as his eyes look like that. You’ve done everything you could, thank you. What you haven’t done, no one else will. Ah! how I suffer from not being able to hope, from not being able to do anything!’
Then in a loud tone she asked:
Then she asked in a loud voice:
‘Are you coming, Claude?’
"Are you coming, Claude?"
She had to repeat her question twice, for at first he did not hear her; he ended by starting, however, and rose to his feet, saying, as if he had answered the summons from the horizon afar off:
She had to ask her question twice because he didn't hear her at first; finally, he reacted and stood up, responding as if he had answered a call from a distant horizon:
‘Yes, I’m coming, I’m coming.’
"Yes, I'm on my way."
When Sandoz and his wife at last found themselves alone in the drawing-room, where the atmosphere now was stifling—heated by the lights and heavy, as it were, with melancholy silence after all the outbursts of the quarrelling—they looked at one another and let their arms fall, quite heart-rent by the unfortunate issue of their dinner party. Henrietta tried to laugh it off, however, murmuring:
When Sandoz and his wife finally found themselves alone in the living room, where the atmosphere was now stifling—heated by the lights and weighed down by a melancholy silence after all the fighting—they looked at each other and let their arms drop, feeling completely broken by the unfortunate outcome of their dinner party. Henrietta tried to laugh it off, though, murmuring:
‘I warned you, I quite understood—’
‘I warned you, I completely understood—’
But he interrupted her with a despairing gesture. What! was that, then, the end of his long illusion, that dream of eternity which had made him set happiness in a few friendships, formed in childhood, and shared until extreme old age? Ah! what a wretched band, what a final rending, what a terrible balance-sheet to weep over after that bankruptcy of the human heart! And he grew astonished on thinking of the friends who had fallen off by the roadside, of the great affections lost on the way, of the others unceasingly changing around himself, in whom he found no change. His poor Thursdays filled him with pity, so many memories were in mourning, it was the slow death of all that one loves! Would his wife and himself have to resign themselves to live as in a desert, to cloister themselves in utter hatred of the world? Ought they rather to throw their doors wide open to a throng of strangers and indifferent folk? By degrees a certainty dawned in the depths of his grief: everything ended and nothing began again in life. He seemed to yield to evidence, and, heaving a big sigh, exclaimed:
But he interrupted her with a desperate gesture. What! Was that really the end of his long illusion, that dream of eternity that had made him find happiness in a few friendships formed in childhood and shared until old age? Ah! What a sad group, what a final tearing apart, what a terrible reckoning to mourn after that bankruptcy of the human heart! He became astonished thinking of the friends who had fallen by the wayside, of the deep connections lost along the journey, and of the others who were constantly changing around him, in whom he found no change. His poor Thursdays filled him with sorrow; so many memories were in mourning, it felt like the slow death of everything one loves! Would he and his wife have to accept living in a desert, isolating themselves in total hatred of the world? Should they instead open their doors wide to a crowd of strangers and indifferent people? Gradually, a certainty emerged from the depths of his grief: everything ends, and nothing begins again in life. He seemed to give in to this realization, and with a deep sigh, he exclaimed:
‘You were right. We won’t invite them to dinner again—they would devour one another.’
‘You were right. We won’t invite them to dinner again—they would eat each other alive.’
As soon as Claude and Christine reached the Place de la Trinite on their way home, the painter let go of his wife’s arm; and, stammering that he had to go somewhere, he begged her to return to the Rue Tourlaque without him. She had felt him shuddering, and she remained quite scared with surprise and fear. Somewhere to go at that hour—past midnight! Where had he to go, and what for? He had turned round and was making off, when she overtook him, and, pretending that she was frightened, begged that he would not leave her to climb up to Montmartre alone at that time of night. This consideration alone brought him back. He took her arm again; they ascended the Rue Blanche and the Rue Lepic, and at last found themselves in the Rue Tourlaque. And on reaching their door, he rang the bell, and then again left her.
As soon as Claude and Christine arrived at Place de la Trinite on their way home, the painter released his wife's arm and, stammering that he had somewhere to go, asked her to head back to Rue Tourlaque without him. She could feel him shuddering, and she was left feeling scared and surprised. Somewhere to go at that hour—past midnight! Where could he be going, and why? He turned around and started to leave when she caught up with him, pretending to be frightened and asking him not to leave her to walk up to Montmartre alone at that time of night. This concern was enough to bring him back. He took her arm again; they walked up Rue Blanche and Rue Lepic, and finally reached Rue Tourlaque. When they got to their door, he rang the bell and then left her again.
‘Here you are,’ he said; ‘I’m going.’
‘Here you go,’ he said; ‘I’m leaving.’
He was already hastening away, taking long strides, and gesticulating like a madman. Without even closing the door which had been opened, she darted off, bent on following him. In the Rue Lepic she drew near; but for fear of exciting him still more she contented herself with keeping him in sight, walking some thirty yards in the rear, without his knowing that she was behind him. On reaching the end of the Rue Lepic he went down the Rue Blanche again, and then proceeded by way of the Rue de la Chaussée-d’Antin and the Rue du Dix Decembre as far as the Rue de Richelieu. When she saw him turn into the last-named thoroughfare, a mortal chill came over her: he was going towards the Seine; it was the realisation of the frightful fear which kept her of a night awake, full of anguish! And what could she do, good Lord? Go with him, hang upon his neck over yonder? She was now only able to stagger along, and as each step brought them nearer to the river, she felt life ebbing from her limbs. Yes, he was going straight there; he crossed the Place du Théâtre Français, then the Carrousel, and finally reached the Pont des Saints-Pères. After taking a few steps along the bridge, he approached the railing overlooking the water; and at the thought that he was about to jump over, a loud cry was stifled in her contracted throat.
He was already hurrying away, taking long strides and waving his arms like a madman. Without even closing the door behind her, she dashed off, determined to follow him. As she got closer on Rue Lepic, she kept her distance, walking about thirty yards behind him to avoid agitating him further, unaware that she was trailing him. When he reached the end of Rue Lepic, he turned down Rue Blanche and then continued along Rue de la Chaussée-d’Antin and Rue du Dix Decembre until he reached Rue de Richelieu. When she saw him turn onto that last street, a chill ran through her: he was heading towards the Seine; it was the very nightmare that kept her awake at night, filled with dread! And what could she do, for heaven's sake? Go with him, cling to him over there? She could barely move anymore, and with each step that brought them closer to the river, she felt her strength fading. Yes, he was headed straight there; he crossed the Place du Théâtre Français, then the Carrousel, and finally reached the Pont des Saints-Pères. After taking a few steps onto the bridge, he approached the railing overlooking the water, and the thought that he was about to jump made a loud cry catch in her throat.
But no; he remained motionless. Was it then only the Cité over yonder that haunted him, that heart of Paris which pursued him everywhere, which he conjured up with his fixed eyes, even through walls, and which, when he was leagues away, cried out the constant summons heard by him alone? She did not yet dare to hope it; she had stopped short, in the rear, watching him with giddy anxiety, ever fancying that she saw him take the terrible leap, but resisting her longing to draw nearer, for fear lest she might precipitate the catastrophe by showing herself. Oh, God! to think that she was there with her devouring passion, her bleeding motherly heart—that she was there beholding everything, without daring to risk one movement to hold him back!
But no; he stayed still. Was it only the Cité over there that haunted him, that heart of Paris that followed him everywhere, that he summoned with his fixed gaze, even through walls, and which, when he was miles away, called out to him with a constant summons that only he could hear? She didn’t dare to hope yet; she had stopped, watching him with dizzying anxiety, always imagining that she saw him take the terrible leap, but holding back her desire to get closer, fearing that she might trigger the disaster by showing herself. Oh, God! to think that she was there with her consuming passion, her aching motherly heart—that she was there witnessing everything, without daring to make a single move to stop him!
He stood erect, looking very tall, quite motionless, and gazing into the night.
He stood up straight, looking really tall, completely still, and staring into the night.
It was a winter’s night, with a misty sky of sooty blackness, and was rendered extremely cold by a sharp wind blowing from the west. Paris, lighted up, had gone to sleep, showing no signs of life save such as attached to the gas-jets, those specks which scintillated and grew smaller and smaller in the distance till they seemed but so much starry dust. The quays stretched away showing double rows of those luminous beads whose reverberation glimmered on the nearer frontages. On the left were the houses of the Quai du Louvre, on the right the two wings of the Institute, confused masses of monuments and buildings, which became lost to view in the darkening gloom, studded with sparks. Then between those cordons of burners, extending as far as the eye could reach, the bridges stretched bars of lights, ever slighter and slighter, each formed of a train of spangles, grouped together and seemingly hanging in mid-air. And in the Seine there shone the nocturnal splendour of the animated water of cities; each gas-jet there cast a reflection of its flame, like the nucleus of a comet, extending into a tail. The nearer ones, mingling together, set the current on fire with broad, regular, symmetrical fans of light, glowing like live embers, while the more distant ones, seen under the bridges, were but little motionless sparks of fire. But the large burning tails appeared to be animated, they waggled as they spread out, all black and gold, with a constant twirling of scales, in which one divined the flow of the water. The whole Seine was lighted up by them, as if some fête were being given in its depths—some mysterious, fairy-like entertainment, at which couples were waltzing beneath the river’s red-flashing window-panes. High above those fires, above the starry quays, the sky, in which not a planet was visible, showed a ruddy mass of vapour, that warm, phosphorescent exhalation which every night, above the sleep of the city, seems to set the crater of a volcano.
It was a winter night, under a misty, dark sky, made even colder by a sharp wind coming from the west. Paris, illuminated, had gone to sleep, showing no signs of life except for the gas lamps, those tiny points of light that twinkled and faded into the distance until they looked like mere starry dust. The quays stretched out, displaying double rows of glowing lights that sparkled on the nearest buildings. To the left were the houses along the Quai du Louvre, and to the right were the two wings of the Institute, a jumble of monuments and buildings that disappeared into the darkening shadows, dotted with glimmers. Then, between those lines of lights, extending as far as the eye could see, the bridges appeared as bars of light, getting thinner and thinner, each consisting of a string of sparkles grouped together and seemingly floating in mid-air. In the Seine, the nighttime shimmer of the lively water of the city shone; each gas lamp reflected its flame, resembling the core of a comet with a trailing tail. The closer lights merged together, igniting the current with broad, even, symmetrical fans of light, glowing like live coals, while the more distant lights, seen under the bridges, looked like tiny, motionless sparks. But the large flaming tails seemed alive, swaying as they spread out, all black and gold, with a constant swirling of scales, hinting at the flow of the water. The entire Seine was lit up by them, as if some celebration were happening in its depths—some mysterious, magical performance, where couples were waltzing beneath the river's red-flashing panes. High above those lights, above the starry quays, the sky, devoid of visible planets, showed a reddish mass of vapor, that warm, phosphorescent mist that every night, above the sleeping city, seems to create the appearance of a volcano's crater.
The wind blew hard, and Christine, shivering, her eyes full of tears, felt the bridge move under her, as if it were bearing her away amid a smash up of the whole scene. Had not Claude moved? Was he not climbing over the rail? No; everything became motionless again, and she saw him still on the same spot, obstinately stiff, with his eyes turned towards the point of the Cité, which he could not see.
The wind howled fiercely, and Christine, shivering with tears in her eyes, felt the bridge sway beneath her, as if it were carrying her away in a chaotic scene. Had Claude moved? Was he not climbing over the railing? No; everything froze again, and she saw him still in the same spot, stubbornly rigid, with his eyes fixed on the Cité, which he couldn't see.
It had summoned him, and he had come, and yet he could not see it in the depths of the darkness. He could only distinguish the bridges, with their light framework standing out blackly against the sparkling water. But farther off everything became confused, the island had disappeared, he could not even have told its exact situation if some belated cabs had not passed from time to time over the Pont-Neuf, with their lamps showing like those shooting sparks which dart at times through embers. A red lantern, on a level with the dam of the Mint, cast a streamlet of blood, as it were, into the water. Something huge and lugubrious, some drifting form, no doubt a lighter which had become unmoored, slowly descended the stream amid the reflections. Espied for a moment, it was immediately afterwards lost in the darkness. Where had the triumphal island sunk? In the depths of that flow of water? Claude still gazed, gradually fascinated by the great rushing of the river in the night. He leant over its broad bed, chilly like an abyss, in which the mysterious flames were dancing. And the loud, sad wail of the current attracted him, and he listened to its call, despairing, unto death.
It had called to him, and he had come, yet he couldn’t see it in the deep darkness. He could only make out the bridges, their light structures stark against the shimmering water. But farther away, everything became jumbled; the island had vanished. He couldn’t even pinpoint its exact location if it weren’t for the occasional cabs crossing the Pont-Neuf, their lights flickering like the sparks that pop occasionally from embers. A red lantern, at the level of the Mint’s dam, cast a stream of blood-red light into the water. Something large and mournful, perhaps a barge that had come loose, drifted slowly down the stream among the reflections. Spotted for a moment, it soon disappeared into the darkness. Where had the triumphal island gone? Into the depths of that water? Claude continued to stare, increasingly captivated by the powerful rush of the river at night. He leaned over its broad expanse, cold like an abyss where mysterious flames danced. And the loud, sorrowful wail of the current drew him in, and he listened to its desperate call, as if unto death.
By a shooting pain at her heart, Christine this time realised that the terrible thought had just occurred to him. She held out her quivering hands which the wind was lashing. But Claude remained there, struggling against the sweetness of death; indeed he did not move for another hour, he lingered there unconscious of the lapse of time, with his eyes still turned in the direction of the Cité, as if by a miracle of power they were about to create light, and conjure up the island so that he might behold it.
By a sharp pain in her heart, Christine realized this time that the terrible thought had just crossed his mind. She stretched out her trembling hands, which the wind was whipping around. But Claude stayed there, fighting against the comfort of death; in fact, he didn’t move for another hour, lost in thought and completely unaware of the passing time, with his eyes still focused toward the Cité, as if they were somehow about to summon light and bring the island into view for him to see.
When Claude at last left the bridge, with stumbling steps, Christine had to pass in front and run in order to be home in the Rue Tourlaque before him.
When Claude finally left the bridge, stumbling as he went, Christine had to hurry in front of him and run to get home on Rue Tourlaque before he did.
XII
IT was nearly three o’clock when they went to bed that night, with the bitter cold November wind blowing through their little room and the big studio. Christine, breathless from her run, had quickly slipped between the sheets so that he might not know that she had followed him; and Claude, quite overcome, had taken his clothes off, one garment after another, without saying a word. For long months they had been as strangers; until then, however, she had never felt such a barrier between them, such tomb-like coldness.
IT was nearly three o’clock when they went to bed that night, with the bitter cold November wind blowing through their little room and the big studio. Christine, breathless from her run, had quickly slipped between the sheets so he wouldn’t know she had followed him; and Claude, feeling overwhelmed, had taken off his clothes, one piece after another, without saying a word. For long months they had been like strangers; until then, however, she had never felt such a barrier between them, such tomb-like coldness.
She struggled for nearly a quarter of an hour against the sleepiness coming over her. She was very tired, and a kind of torpor numbed her; still she would not give way, feeling anxious at leaving him awake. She thus waited every night until he dozed off, so that she herself might afterwards sleep in peace. But he had not extinguished the candle, he lay there with his eyes open, fixed upon its flame. What could he be thinking of? Had he remained in fancy over yonder in the black night, amid the moist atmosphere of the quays, in front of Paris studded with stars like a frosty sky? And what inner conflict, what matter that had to be decided, contracted his face like that? Then, resistance being impossible, she succumbed and glided into the slumber following upon great weariness.
She struggled for almost fifteen minutes against the sleepiness that was washing over her. She was exhausted, and a kind of lethargy held her down; still, she wouldn't give in, feeling worried about leaving him awake. So, she stayed up every night until he fell asleep, so she could then rest easy. But he hadn’t blown out the candle; he lay there with his eyes open, focused on its flame. What could he be thinking? Was he still imagining the dark night, with the damp air of the quays, in front of Paris, where stars dotted the sky like frost? And what inner turmoil or decision had etched that look on his face? Finally, realizing she couldn’t fight it any longer, she gave in and drifted off into a deep sleep from her exhaustion.
An hour later, the consciousness of something missing, the anguish of uneasiness awoke her with a sudden start. She at once felt the bed beside her, it was already cold: he was no longer there, she had already divined it while asleep. And she was growing alarmed, still but half awake, her head heavy and her ears buzzing, when through the doorway, left ajar, she perceived a ray of light coming from the studio. She then felt reassured, she thought that in a fit of sleeplessness he had gone to fetch some book or other; but at last, as he did not return, she ended by softly rising so as to take a peep. What she beheld quite unsettled her, and kept her standing on the tiled floor, with her feet bare, in such surprise that she did not at first dare to show herself.
An hour later, the feeling that something was off, the discomfort of anxiety, woke her up with a sudden jolt. She immediately noticed the bed next to her was already cold: he was gone, and she'd realized it even in her sleep. She felt anxious, still only half awake, her head heavy and her ears ringing, when she noticed a beam of light coming from the studio through the slightly open door. This brought her some comfort; she thought he must have gone to grab a book because he couldn’t sleep. But when he still didn’t come back, she gradually got up to take a look. What she saw completely shocked her and left her standing on the tiled floor, her bare feet cold, in such disbelief that she didn’t dare show herself at first.
Claude, who was in his shirt-sleeves, despite the coldness of the temperature, having merely put on his trousers and slippers in his haste, was standing on the steps in front of his large picture. His palette was lying at his feet, and with one hand he held the candle, while with the other he painted. His eyes were dilated like those of a somnambulist, his gestures were precise and stiff; he stooped every minute to take some colour on his brush, and then rose up, casting a large fantastic shadow on the wall. And there was not a sound; frightful silence reigned in the big dim room.
Claude, who was in his shirt sleeves despite the cold, had quickly put on just his trousers and slippers. He was standing on the steps in front of his large painting. His palette lay at his feet, and he held a candle in one hand while painting with the other. His eyes were wide like those of a sleepwalker, and his movements were precise and stiff. He bent down every minute to grab some paint on his brush, then stood up, casting a large, eerie shadow on the wall. And there was complete silence; a terrifying stillness filled the big, dim room.
Christine guessed the truth and shuddered. The besetting worry, made more acute by that hour spent on the Pont des Saints-Pères, had prevented him from sleeping and had brought him once more before his canvas, consumed with a longing to look at it again, in spite of the lateness of the hour. He had, no doubt, only climbed the steps to fill his eyes the nearer. Then, tortured by the sight of some faulty shade, upset by some defect, to such a point that he could not wait for daylight, he had caught up a brush, at first merely wishing to give a simple touch, and then had been carried on from correction to correction, until at last, with the candle in his hand, he painted there like a man in a state of hallucination, amid the pale light which darted hither and thither as he gesticulated. His powerless creative rage had seized hold of him again, he was wearing himself out, oblivious of the hour, oblivious of the world; he wished to infuse life into his work at once.
Christine sensed the truth and felt a shiver. The nagging worry, intensified by that hour spent on the Pont des Saints-Pères, had kept him from sleeping and brought him back to his canvas, consumed with a desire to see it again, despite the late hour. He had probably only climbed the steps to get a closer look. Then, tormented by a poor shade or some flaw, to the point where he couldn’t wait for daylight, he picked up a brush, initially just wanting to make a quick touch-up, but then he got carried away with corrections, until finally, with the candle in his hand, he painted like a person in a trance, moving in the flickering light as he gestured. His overwhelming creative passion had taken hold of him again; he was exhausting himself, oblivious to the time and the world around him; he wanted to breathe life into his work immediately.
Ah, what a pitiful sight! And with what tear-drenched eyes did Christine gaze at him! At first she thought of leaving him to that mad work, as a maniac is left to the pleasures of his craziness. He would never finish that picture, that was quite certain now. The more desperately he worked at it, the more incoherent did it become; the colouring had grown heavy and pasty, the drawing was losing shape and showing signs of effort. Even the background and the group of labourers, once so substantial and satisfactory, were getting spoiled; yet he clung to them, he had obstinately determined to finish everything else before repainting the central figure, the nude woman, which remained the dread and the desire of his hours of toil, and which would finish him off whenever he might again try to invest it with life. For months he had not touched it, and this had tranquillised Christine and made her tolerant and compassionate, amid her jealous spite; for as long as he did not return to that feared and desired mistress, she thought that he betrayed her less.
Ah, what a sad sight! And with such tearful eyes did Christine look at him! At first, she considered leaving him to that crazy work, just like you would leave a madman to his delusions. It was clear now that he would never finish that painting. The harder he worked on it, the more chaotic it became; the colors were thick and dull, the drawing was losing its form and showing signs of strain. Even the background and the group of laborers, once so solid and satisfying, were getting ruined; yet he held on to them stubbornly, determined to complete everything else before repainting the central figure, the nude woman, which had become both his dread and obsession during his hours of toil, and which would completely overwhelm him anytime he tried to bring it to life again. He hadn’t touched it for months, and this had calmed Christine and made her more understanding and compassionate, despite her jealousy; as long as he didn’t return to that feared and desired muse, she felt like he was betraying her less.
Her feet were freezing on the tiles, and she was turning to get into bed again when a shock brought her back to the door. She had not understood at first, but now at last she saw. With broad curved strokes of his brush, full of colour, Claude was at once wildly and caressingly modelling flesh. He had a fixed grin on his lips, and did not feel the burning candle-grease falling on his fingers, while with silent, passionate see-sawing, his right arm alone moved against the wall, casting black confusion upon it. He was working at the nude woman.
Her feet were freezing on the tiles, and she was about to get back into bed when a jolt brought her attention back to the door. She hadn’t gotten it at first, but now she finally understood. With bold, sweeping strokes of his brush, bursting with color, Claude was both wildly and tenderly shaping the figure of a woman. He had a fixed grin on his face and didn’t even notice the hot candle wax dripping onto his fingers, while his right arm moved back and forth rhythmically against the wall, casting dark shadows on it. He was focused on painting the nude woman.
Then Christine opened the door and walked into the studio. An invincible revolt, the anger of a wife buffeted at home, impelled her forward. Yes, he was with that other, he was painting her like a visionary, whom wild craving for truth had brought to the madness of the unreal; and those limbs were being gilded like the columns of a tabernacle, that trunk was becoming a star, shimmering with yellow and red, splendid and unnatural. Such strange nudity—like unto a monstrance gleaming with precious stones and intended for religious adoration—brought her anger to a climax. She had suffered too much, she would not tolerate it.
Then Christine opened the door and walked into the studio. An unstoppable uprising, the frustration of a wife stuck at home, pushed her forward. Yes, he was with that other woman, painting her like a visionary, driven to madness by a desperate search for truth; and those limbs were being coated like the columns of a shrine, that torso was becoming a star, glowing with yellow and red, stunning yet unnatural. Such odd nudity—like a monstrance shining with precious stones, meant for worship—sent her anger over the edge. She had endured too much, and she wouldn’t stand for it.
And yet at first she simply showed herself despairing and supplicating. It was but the mother remonstrating with her big mad boy of an artist that spoke.
And yet at first she just looked hopeless and pleading. It was just the mother arguing with her big, crazy artist son that was speaking.
‘What are you doing there, Claude? Is it reasonable, Claude, to have such ideas? Come to bed, I beg of you, don’t stay on those steps where you will catch your death of cold!’
‘What are you doing there, Claude? Is it sensible, Claude, to have such thoughts? Come to bed, please, don’t stay on those steps where you’ll catch a cold!’
He did not answer; he stooped again to take some more paint on his brush, and made the figure flash with two bright strokes of vermilion.
He didn't reply; he bent down again to grab more paint on his brush and made the figure pop with two bright strokes of red.
‘Listen to me, Claude, in pity come to me—you know that I love you—you see how anxious you have made me. Come, oh! come, if you don’t want me to die of cold and waiting for you.’
‘Listen to me, Claude, please come to me—you know that I love you—you see how worried you’ve made me. Come, oh! come, if you don’t want me to die from the cold and waiting for you.’
With his face haggard, he did not look at her; but while he bedecked a part of the figure with carmine, he grumbled in a husky voice:
With his face worn out, he didn't look at her; but while he decorated part of the figure with red, he muttered in a raspy voice:
‘Just leave me alone, will you? I’m working.’
‘Just leave me alone, okay? I’m busy.’
Christine remained silent for a moment. She was drawing herself erect, her eyes began to gleam with fire, rebellion inflated her gentle, charming form. Then she burst forth, with the growl of a slave driven to extremities.
Christine stayed quiet for a moment. She straightened up, her eyes shining with intensity, and a sense of rebellion filled her gentle, charming figure. Then she erupted, like a slave pushed to their limits.
‘Well, no, I won’t leave you alone! I’ve had enough of it. I’ll tell you what’s stifling me, what has been killing me ever since I have known you. Ah! that painting, yes, your painting, she’s the murderess who has poisoned my life! I had a presentiment of it on the first day; your painting frightened me as if it were a monster. I found it abominable, execrable; but then, one’s cowardly, I loved you too much not to like it also; I ended by growing accustomed to it! But later on, how I suffered!—how it tortured me! For ten years I don’t recollect having spent a day without shedding tears. No, leave me! I am easing my mind, I must speak out, since I have found strength enough to do so. For ten years I have been abandoned and crushed every day. Ah! to be nothing more to you, to feel myself cast more and more on one side, to fall to the rank of a servant; and to see that other one, that thief, place herself between you and me and clutch hold of you and triumph and insult me! For dare, yes, dare to say that she hasn’t taken possession of you, limb by limb, glided into your brain, your heart, your flesh, everywhere! She holds you like a vice, she feeds on you; in fact, she’s your wife, not I. She’s the only one you care for! Ah! the cursed wretch, the hussy!’
‘Well, no, I won’t leave you alone! I’ve had enough of it. I’ll tell you what’s suffocating me, what has been destroying me ever since I met you. Ah! that painting, yes, your painting, it’s the one that has poisoned my life! I sensed it from the very first day; your painting scared me like it was a monster. I found it disgusting, horrible; but then, I was weak, I cared for you too much not to like it too; I ended up getting used to it! But later on, how I suffered!—how it tormented me! For ten years I can’t remember a day without crying. No, leave me! I’m just getting it off my chest, I need to speak out now that I have the courage to do so. For ten years I’ve felt abandoned and crushed every single day. Ah! to mean nothing to you anymore, to feel myself pushed aside, to be reduced to the status of a servant; and to see that other one, that thief, put herself between us and grab hold of you and enjoy her victory while insulting me! For dare, yes, dare to say that she hasn’t taken complete control of you, body and soul, seeped into your mind, your heart, your flesh, everywhere! She has you in a grip, she feeds off you; in fact, she’s your wife, not me. She’s the only one you care about! Ah! the damned wretch, the skank!’
Claude was now listening to her, in his astonishment at that dolorous outburst; and being but half roused from his exasperated creative dream, he did not as yet very well understand why she was talking to him like that. And at sight of his stupor, the shuddering of a man surprised in a debauch, she flew into a still greater passion; she mounted the steps, tore the candlestick from his hand, and in her turn flashed the light in front of the picture.
Claude was now listening to her, amazed by her sorrowful outburst; and still half lost in his frustrated creative dream, he didn’t quite grasp why she was speaking to him like that. Seeing his bewilderment, like a man caught in a drunken haze, she got even angrier; she climbed the steps, snatched the candlestick from his hand, and shone the light onto the picture herself.
‘Just look!’ she cried, ‘just tell me how you have improved matters? It’s hideous, it’s lamentable and grotesque; you’ll end by seeing so yourself. Come, isn’t it ugly, isn’t it idiotic? You see very well that you are conquered, so why should you persist any longer? There is no sense in it, that’s what upsets me. If you can’t be a great painter, life, at least, remains to us. Ah! life, life!’
‘Just look!’ she exclaimed, ‘just tell me how you’ve improved things? It’s awful, it’s a shame, and it’s ridiculous; you’ll end up realizing that yourself. Come on, isn’t it ugly, isn’t it foolish? You know you’re beaten, so why keep going? It doesn’t make any sense, and that’s what frustrates me. If you can’t be a great painter, at least we still have life. Ah! life, life!’
She had placed the candle on the platform of the steps, and as he had gone down, staggering, she sprang off to join him, and they both found themselves below, he crouching on the last step, and she pressing his inert, dangling hands with all her strength.
She had put the candle on the step platform, and as he stumbled down, she jumped off to join him. They both ended up below, him squatting on the last step, while she held his limp, hanging hands with all her strength.
‘Come, there’s life! Drive your nightmare away, and let us live, live together. Isn’t it too stupid, to be we two together, to be growing old already, and to torture ourselves, and fail in every attempt to find happiness? Oh! the grave will take us soon enough, never fear. Let’s try to live, and love one another. Remember Bennecourt! Listen to my dream. I should like to be able to take you away to-morrow. We would go far from this cursed Paris, we would find a quiet spot somewhere, and you would see how pleasant I would make your life; how nice it would be to forget everything together! Of a morning there are strolls in the sunlight, the breakfast which smells nice, the idle afternoon, the evening spent side by side under the lamp! And no more worrying about chimeras, nothing but the delight of living! Doesn’t it suffice that I love you, that I adore you, that I am willing to be your servant, your slave, to exist solely for your pleasures? Do you hear, I love you, I love you? there is nothing else, and that is enough—I love you!’
‘Come on, there’s life! Push your nightmare aside, and let’s live, live together. Isn’t it ridiculous for the two of us to be here, getting old, torturing ourselves, and failing at every attempt to find happiness? Oh! The grave will come for us soon enough, don’t worry. Let’s try to live and love one another. Remember Bennecourt! Listen to my dream. I wish I could take you away tomorrow. We’d escape this cursed Paris, find a quiet place somewhere, and you’d see how enjoyable I could make your life; how wonderful it would be to forget everything together! In the morning, there are sunny strolls, breakfast that smells amazing, lazy afternoons, and evenings spent side by side under the lamp! And no more fretting over fantasies, just the joy of living! Doesn’t it matter that I love you, that I adore you, that I’m ready to be your servant, your slave, to exist only for your happiness? Do you hear me? I love you, I love you! That’s all there is, and that’s enough—I love you!’
He had freed his hands, and making a gesture of refusal, he said, in a gloomy voice:
He had freed his hands, and with a gesture of refusal, he said in a gloomy voice:
‘No, it is not enough! I won’t go away with you, I won’t be happy, I will paint!’
‘No, it’s not enough! I won’t go away with you, I won’t be happy, I will paint!’
‘And I shall die of it, eh? And you will die of it, and we shall end by leaving all our blood and all our tears in it! There’s nothing beyond Art, that is the fierce almighty god who strikes us with his thunder, and whom you honour! he may crush us, since he is the master, and you will still bless his name!’
‘And I'm going to die for it, right? And you will die for it, and in the end, we’ll leave all our blood and tears in it! There’s nothing beyond Art; it’s the fierce, all-powerful god who hits us with his thunder, and whom you worship! He might crush us since he’s the master, and you’ll still praise his name!’
‘Yes, I belong to that god, he may do what he pleases with me. I should die if I no longer painted, and I prefer to paint and die of it. Besides, my will is nothing in the matter. Nothing exists beyond art; let the world burst!’
‘Yes, I belong to that god; he can do whatever he wants with me. I would die if I stopped painting, and I’d rather paint and die from it. Besides, my will doesn’t matter here. Nothing exists beyond art; let the world fall apart!’
She drew herself up in a fresh spurt of anger. Her voice became harsh and passionate again.
She straightened up in a new surge of anger. Her voice turned harsh and intense again.
‘But I—I am alive, and the women you love are lifeless! Oh! don’t say no! I know very well that all those painted women of yours are the only ones you care about! Before I was yours I had already perceived it. Then, for a short time you appeared to love me. It was at that period you told me all that nonsense about your fondness for your creations. You held such shadows in pity when you were with me; but it didn’t last. You returned to them, oh! like a maniac returns to his mania. I, though living, no longer existed for you; it was they, the visions, who again became the only realities of your life. What I then endured you never knew, for you are wonderfully ignorant of women. I have lived by your side without your ever understanding me. Yes, I was jealous of those painted creatures. When I posed to you, only one idea lent me the courage that I needed. I wanted to fight them, I hoped to win you back; but you granted me nothing, not even a kiss on my shoulder! Oh, God! how ashamed I sometimes felt! What grief I had to force back at finding myself thus disdained and thus betrayed!’
‘But I—I am alive, and the women you love are lifeless! Oh! don’t say no! I know very well that all those painted women of yours are the only ones you care about! Before I was yours, I had already seen it. Then, for a little while, you seemed to love me. It was during that time you told me all that nonsense about your affection for your creations. You looked at those shadows with pity when you were with me; but it didn’t last. You went back to them, oh! like a maniac returns to his obsession. I, though living, no longer existed for you; it was they, the visions, who once again became the only realities in your life. What I went through, you never knew, because you are wonderfully clueless about women. I have lived by your side without you ever understanding me. Yes, I was jealous of those painted creatures. When I posed for you, only one thought gave me the courage I needed. I wanted to fight them; I hoped to win you back. But you gave me nothing, not even a kiss on my shoulder! Oh, God! how ashamed I sometimes felt! What heartbreak I had to stifle at finding myself so disdained and betrayed!’
She continued boldly, she spoke out freely—she, so strangely compounded of passion and modesty. And she was not mistaken in her jealousy when she accused his art of being responsible for his neglect of herself. At the bottom of it all, there was the theory which he had repeated a hundred times in her presence: genius should be chaste, an artist’s only spouse should be his work.
She pressed on confidently, expressing herself openly—she, so uniquely mixed with desire and reserve. And she wasn't wrong in her jealousy when she blamed his art for his disregard of her. Underneath it all was the belief he had repeated countless times in her presence: true genius should remain pure, an artist's only partner should be their work.
‘You repulse me,’ she concluded violently; ‘you draw back from me as if I displeased you! And you love what? A nothing, a mere semblance, a little dust, some colour spread upon a canvas! But, once more, look at her, look at your woman up yonder! See what a monster you have made of her in your madness! Are there any women like that? Have any women golden limbs, and flowers on their bodies? Wake up, open your eyes, return to life again!’
‘You disgust me,’ she finished angrily; ‘you pull away from me as if I annoy you! And you love what? Nothing, just an illusion, a bit of dust, some paint on a canvas! But once more, look at her, look at your woman up there! See what a monster you’ve created in your madness! Are there any women like that? Do any women have golden limbs and flowers on their bodies? Wake up, open your eyes, come back to reality!’
Claude, obeying the imperious gesture with which she pointed to the picture, had now risen and was looking. The candle, which had remained upon the platform of the steps, illumined the nude woman like a taper in front of an altar, whilst the whole room around remained plunged in darkness. He was at length awakening from his dream, and the woman thus seen from below, at a distance of a few paces, filled him with stupefaction. Who had just painted that idol of some unknown religion? Who had wrought her of metals, marbles, and gems? Was it he who had unconsciously created that symbol of insatiable passion, that unhuman presentment of flesh, which had become transformed into gold and diamonds under his fingers, in his vain effort to make it live? He gasped and felt afraid of his work, trembling at the thought of that sudden plunge into the infinite, and understanding at last that it had become impossible for him even to depict Reality, despite his long effort to conquer and remould it, making it yet more real with his human hands.
Claude, following the commanding gesture she used to point at the picture, stood up and stared. The candle, left on the step platform, lit up the nude woman like a flame before an altar, while the rest of the room was enveloped in darkness. He was finally waking from his dream, and seeing the woman from below, just a few steps away, left him in shock. Who had just painted this idol of some unknown religion? Who had shaped her from metals, marbles, and gems? Was it he who had unconsciously created this symbol of unquenchable desire, this inhuman representation of flesh that had turned into gold and diamonds under his hands, in his futile attempt to bring it to life? He gasped, feeling afraid of his creation, shuddering at the thought of that sudden dive into the infinite, finally realizing that it had become impossible for him to even portray Reality, despite his long struggle to conquer and reshape it, making it more real with his human touch.
‘You see! you see!’ Christine repeated, victoriously. And he, in a very low voice, stammered:
‘You see! you see!’ Christine repeated, triumphantly. And he, in a very quiet voice, stammered:
‘Oh! what have I done? Is it impossible to create, then? Haven’t our hands the power to create beings?’
‘Oh! What have I done? Is it impossible to create, then? Don’t our hands have the power to create beings?’
She felt that he was giving way, and she caught him in her arms:
She sensed that he was giving in, and she embraced him.
‘But why all this folly?—why think of anyone but me—I who love you? You took me for your model, but what was the use, say? Are those paintings of yours worth me? They are frightful, they are as stiff, as cold as corpses. But I am alive, and I love you!’
‘But why all this nonsense?—why think of anyone but me—I who love you? You used me as your inspiration, but what’s the point, really? Are those paintings of yours worth more than me? They’re awful, as stiff and cold as corpses. But I am alive, and I love you!’
She seemed to be at that moment the very incarnation of passionate love. He turned and looked at her, and little by little he returned her embrace; she was softening him and conquering him.
She appeared to be the very embodiment of passionate love in that moment. He turned to her and gradually returned her embrace; she was softening him and winning him over.
‘Listen!’ she continued. ‘I know that you had a frightful thought; yes, I never dared to speak to you about it, because one must never bring on misfortune; but I no longer sleep of a night, you frighten me. This evening I followed you to that bridge which I hate, and I trembled, oh! I thought that it was all over—that I had lost you. Oh, God! what would become of me? I need you—you surely do not wish to kill me! Let us live and love one another—yes, love one another!’
‘Listen!’ she continued. ‘I know you had a terrifying thought; yes, I never dared to talk to you about it because we shouldn’t invite bad luck; but I can’t sleep at night anymore, you scare me. This evening, I followed you to that bridge that I hate, and I was shaking, oh! I thought it was all over—that I had lost you. Oh, God! What would happen to me? I need you—you wouldn’t want to hurt me, right? Let’s live and love each other—yes, love each other!’
Then, in the emotion caused him by her infinite passion and grief, he yielded. He pressed her to him, sobbing and stammering:
Then, overwhelmed by her boundless passion and sorrow, he gave in. He pulled her close, crying and stumbling over his words:
‘It is true I had that frightful thought—I should have done it, and I only resisted on thinking of that unfinished picture. But can I still live if work will have nothing more to do with me? How can I live after that, after what’s there, what I spoilt just now?’
‘It's true I had that terrifying thought—I should have gone through with it, and I only held back because of that unfinished painting. But can I really go on if work will no longer have anything to do with me? How can I live after that, after what’s happened, after what I just ruined?’
‘I will love you, and you will live.’
'I will love you, and you will live.'
‘Ah! you will never love me enough—I know myself. Something which does not exist would be necessary—something which would make me forget everything. You were already unable to change me. You cannot accomplish a miracle!’
‘Ah! you will never love me enough—I know that about myself. I need something that doesn’t exist—something that would help me forget everything. You were already unable to change me. You can’t work a miracle!’
Then, as she protested and kissed him passionately, he went on: ‘Well, yes, save me! Yes, save me, if you don’t want me to kill myself! Lull me, annihilate me, so that I may become your thing, slave enough, small enough to dwell under your feet, in your slippers. Ah! to live only on your perfume, to obey you like a dog, to eat and sleep—if I could, if I only could!’
Then, as she protested and kissed him passionately, he continued: ‘Well, yes, save me! Yes, save me, if you don't want me to take my own life! Calm me, erase me, so I can become your possession, small enough to stay under your feet, in your slippers. Ah! to live only on your scent, to obey you like a dog, to eat and sleep—if I could, if I only could!’
She raised a cry of victory: ‘At last you are mine! There is only I left, the other is quite dead!’
She shouted in triumph, "Finally, you are mine! I'm the only one left; the other is completely dead!"
And she dragged him from the execrated painting, she carried him off triumphantly. The candle, now nearly consumed, flared up for a minute behind them on the steps, before the big painting, and then went out. It was victory, yes, but could it last?
And she pulled him away from the cursed painting, carrying him off in triumph. The candle, now almost burned out, flickered briefly behind them on the steps, in front of the large painting, and then went out. It was a victory, yes, but could it last?
Daylight was about to break, and Christine lay asleep beside Claude. She was breathing softly, and a smile played upon her lips. He had closed his eyes; and yet, despite himself, he opened them afresh and gazed into the darkness. Sleep fled from him, and confused ideas again ascended to his brain. As the dawn appeared, yellowishly dirty, like a splash of liquid mud on the window-panes, he started, fancying that he heard a loud voice calling to him from the far end of the studio. Then, irresistibly, despite a few brief hours’ forgetfulness, all his old thoughts returned, overflowing and torturing him, hollowing his cheeks and contracting his jaws in the disgust he felt for mankind. Two wrinkles imparted intense bitterness to the expression of his face, which looked like the wasted countenance of an old man. And suddenly the loud voice from the far end of the studio imperiously summoned him a second time. Then he quite made up his mind: it was all over, he suffered too much, he could no longer live, since everything was a lie, since there was nothing left upon earth. Love! what was it? Nought but a passing illusion. This thought at last mastered him, possessed him entirely; and soon the craving for nothingness as his only refuge came on him stronger than ever. At first he let Christine’s head slip down from his shoulder on which it rested. And then, as a third summons rang out in his mind, he rose and went to the studio, saying:
Daylight was about to break, and Christine lay asleep beside Claude. She was breathing softly, and a smile played on her lips. He had closed his eyes; yet, despite himself, he opened them again and stared into the darkness. Sleep fled from him, and confused thoughts began to swirl in his mind. As dawn appeared, a dirty yellow like a splash of liquid mud on the window, he startled, thinking he heard a loud voice calling to him from the far end of the studio. Then, uncontrollably, despite a few brief hours of forgetfulness, all his old thoughts came flooding back, overwhelming and torturing him, hollowing out his cheeks and tightening his jaws with disgust for humanity. Two deep lines etched intense bitterness into his expression, making his face look like that of an old man. Suddenly, the loud voice from the far end of the studio called out to him again, more urgently this time. He resolved in that moment: it was all over; he suffered too much to continue living since everything was a lie and there was nothing left on earth. Love! What was it? Just a fleeting illusion. This thought finally took hold of him, consuming him entirely, and soon the desire for nothingness as his only escape overwhelmed him more than ever. At first, he let Christine's head slide off his shoulder where it had been resting. Then, as a third urgent call echoed in his mind, he got up and went to the studio, saying:
‘Yes, yes, I’m coming,’
"Yeah, yeah, I'm on my way,"
The sky did not clear, it still remained dirty and mournful—it was one of those lugubrious winter dawns; and an hour later Christine herself awoke with a great chilly shiver. She did not understand at first. How did it happen that she was alone? Then she remembered: she had fallen asleep with her cheek against his. How was it then that he had left her? Where could he be? Suddenly, amid her torpor, she sprang out of bed and ran into the studio. Good God! had he returned to the other then? Had the other seized hold of him again, when she herself fancied that she had conquered him for ever?
The sky was still overcast and gloomy—it was one of those bleak winter mornings; and an hour later, Christine woke up feeling a chilling shiver. At first, she didn’t understand. How was it that she was alone? Then she remembered: she had fallen asleep with her cheek against his. So why had he left her? Where could he be? Suddenly, feeling dazed, she jumped out of bed and ran into the studio. Good God! Had he gone back to the other person? Had the other person taken him again when she thought she had won him over for good?
She saw nothing at the first glance she took; in the cold and murky morning twilight the studio seemed to her to be deserted. But whilst she was tranquillising herself at seeing nobody there, she raised her eyes to the canvas, and a terrible cry leapt from her gaping mouth:
She saw nothing at first glance; in the cold and dark morning light, the studio looked deserted. But as she calmed herself at the sight of no one around, she raised her eyes to the canvas, and a terrifying scream escaped from her open mouth:
‘Claude! oh, Claude!’
‘Claude! Oh, Claude!’
Claude had hanged himself from the steps in front of his spoilt work. He had simply taken one of the cords which held the frame to the wall, and had mounted the platform, so as to fasten the rope to an oaken crosspiece, which he himself had one day nailed to the uprights to consolidate them. Then from up above he had leapt into space. He was hanging there in his shirt, with his feet bare, looking horrible, with his black tongue protruding, and his bloodshot eyes starting from their orbits; he seemed to have grown frightfully tall in his motionless stiffness, and his face was turned towards the picture, close to the nude woman, as if he had wished to infuse his soul into her with his last gasp, and as if he were still looking at her with his expressionless eyes.
Claude had hanged himself from the steps in front of his ruined work. He simply took one of the cords that held the frame to the wall and climbed up onto the platform to tie the rope to an oak crossbeam he had once nailed in place to reinforce the structure. Then, from above, he jumped into the void. He was hanging there in just his shirt and bare feet, looking terrible, with his black tongue sticking out and his bloodshot eyes bulging from their sockets; he seemed to have grown frighteningly tall in his stillness, and his face was turned toward the painting, close to the nude woman, as if he had wanted to share his soul with her in his last breath, as if he were still gazing at her with his vacant eyes.
Christine, however, remained erect, quite overwhelmed with the grief, fright, and anger which dilated her body. Only a continuous howl came from her throat. She opened her arms, stretched them towards the picture, and clenched both hands.
Christine, however, stood tall, completely overwhelmed with grief, fear, and anger that filled her body. Only a continuous scream came from her throat. She opened her arms, reached them toward the picture, and clenched her fists.
‘Oh, Claude! oh, Claude!’ she gasped at last, ‘she has taken you back—the hussy has killed you, killed you, killed you!’
‘Oh, Claude! oh, Claude!’ she gasped at last, ‘she has taken you back—the cheeky girl has killed you, killed you, killed you!’
Then her legs gave way. She span round and fell all of a heap upon the tiled flooring. Her excessive suffering had taken all the blood from her heart, and, fainting away, she lay there, as if she were dead, like a white rag, miserable, done for, crushed beneath the fierce sovereignty of Art. Above her the nude woman rose radiant in her symbolic idol’s brightness; painting triumphed, alone immortal and erect, even when mad.
Then her legs gave out. She spun around and collapsed onto the tiled floor. Her intense pain had drained all the blood from her heart, and, fainting, she lay there as if she were dead, like a white rag, miserable, finished, crushed under the fierce power of Art. Above her, the naked woman stood bright in her symbolic idol’s glory; painting triumphed, immortal and standing tall, even in madness.
At nine o’clock on the Monday morning, when Sandoz, after the formalities and delay occasioned by the suicide, arrived in the Rue Tourlaque for the funeral, he found only a score of people on the footway. Despite his great grief, he had been running about for three days, compelled to attend to everything. At first, as Christine had been picked up half dead, he had been obliged to have her carried to the Hôpital de Lariboisière; then he had gone from the municipal offices, to the undertaker’s and the church, paying everywhere, and full of indifference so far as that went, since the priests were willing to pray over that corpse with a black circle round its neck. Among the people who were waiting he as yet only perceived some neighbours, together with a few inquisitive folk; while other people peered out of the house windows and whispered together, excited by the tragedy. Claude’s friends would, no doubt, soon come. He, Sandoz, had not been able to write to any members of the family, as he did not know their addresses. However, he retreated into the background on the arrival of two relatives, whom three lines in the newspapers had roused from the forgetfulness in which Claude himself, no doubt, had left them. There was an old female cousin,* with the equivocal air of a dealer in second-hand goods, and a male cousin, of the second degree, a wealthy man, decorated with the Legion of Honour, and owning one of the large Paris drapery shops. He showed himself good-naturedly condescending in his elegance, and desirous of displaying an enlightened taste for art. The female cousin at once went upstairs, turned round the studio, sniffed at all the bare wretchedness, and then walked down again, with a hard mouth, as if she were irritated at having taken the trouble to come. The second cousin, on the contrary, drew himself up and walked first behind the hearse, filling the part of chief mourner with proud and pleasant fitness.
At nine o’clock on Monday morning, when Sandoz arrived in Rue Tourlaque for the funeral after the delays caused by the suicide, he found only a dozen people on the street. Despite his deep sorrow, he had been running around for three days, forced to handle everything. Initially, since Christine had been brought in half dead, he had to get her taken to the Hôpital de Lariboisière; then he went from the municipal offices to the funeral home and the church, paying everywhere and feeling indifferent about it all, since the priests were ready to pray over that body with a black mark around its neck. Among the people waiting, he could only see a few neighbors and some curious onlookers, while others peeked out of their windows and whispered to each other, stirred by the tragedy. Claude’s friends would likely be arriving soon. He, Sandoz, hadn’t been able to write to any family members since he didn’t know their addresses. However, he stepped back when two relatives arrived, roused from their forgetfulness by a few lines in the papers. There was an older female cousin, looking vaguely like a second-hand goods seller, and a male cousin, a wealthy man decorated with the Legion of Honour who owned a large drapery shop in Paris. He presented himself with good-natured condescension, trying to show off his refined taste in art. The female cousin immediately went upstairs, looked around the studio, appraised the stark misery, and then came back down with a stiff expression, as if annoyed at having bothered to come. The male cousin, on the other hand, straightened up and walked behind the hearse, fitting the role of chief mourner with a proud and pleasant dignity.
* Madame Sidonie, who figures in M. Zola’s novel, ‘La Curee.’ The male cousin, mentioned immediately afterwards, is Octave Mouret, the leading character of ‘Pot-Bouille’ and ‘Au Bonheur des Dames.’—ED.
* Madame Sidonie, who is featured in M. Zola’s novel, ‘La Curee.’ The male cousin mentioned right after is Octave Mouret, the main character in ‘Pot-Bouille’ and ‘Au Bonheur des Dames.’—ED.
As the procession was starting off, Bongrand came up, and, after shaking hands with Sandoz, remained beside him. He was gloomy, and, glancing at the fifteen or twenty strangers who followed, he murmured:
As the procession was getting underway, Bongrand approached, and after shaking hands with Sandoz, stayed next to him. He looked downcast, and glancing at the fifteen or twenty strangers trailing behind, he murmured:
‘Ah! poor chap! What! are there only we two?’
‘Ah! poor guy! What! Is it just the two of us?’
Dubuche was at Cannes with his children. Jory and Fagerolles kept away, the former hating the deceased and the latter being too busy. Mahoudeau alone caught the party up at the rise of the Rue Lepic, and he explained that Gagnière must have missed the train.
Dubuche was in Cannes with his kids. Jory and Fagerolles stayed away, the former despising the deceased and the latter being too busy. Mahoudeau was the only one who joined the group at the top of Rue Lepic, and he mentioned that Gagnière must have missed the train.
The hearse slowly ascended the steep thoroughfare which winds round the flanks of the height of Montmartre; and now and then cross streets, sloping downward, sudden gaps amid the houses, showed one the immensity of Paris as deep and as broad as a sea. When the party arrived in front of the Church of St. Pierre, and the coffin was carried up the steps, it overtopped the great city for a moment. There was a grey wintry sky overhead, large masses of clouds swept along, carried away by an icy wind, and in the mist Paris seemed to expand, to become endless, filling the horizon with threatening billows. The poor fellow who had wished to conquer it, and had broken his neck in his fruitless efforts, now passed in front of it, nailed under an oaken board, returning to the earth like one of the city’s muddy waves.
The hearse slowly climbed the steep road that winds around the sides of Montmartre; occasionally, side streets sloped downward, revealing glimpses of the vastness of Paris, deep and wide like a sea. When the group reached the Church of St. Pierre and the coffin was lifted up the steps, it momentarily overshadowed the great city. A gray winter sky loomed above, large clouds rushed by, carried away by a freezing wind, and in the haze, Paris seemed to stretch endlessly, filling the horizon with ominous waves. The unfortunate man who had wanted to conquer it, but had broken his neck in his futile attempts, now passed in front of it, trapped beneath an oak board, returning to the earth like one of the city's muddy waves.
On leaving the church the female cousin disappeared, Mahoudeau likewise; while the second cousin again took his position behind the hearse. Seven other unknown persons decided to follow, and they started for the new cemetery of St. Ouen, to which the populace has given the disquieting and lugubrious name of Cayenne. There were ten mourners in all.
On leaving the church, the female cousin vanished, as did Mahoudeau; meanwhile, the second cousin returned to his spot behind the hearse. Seven other strangers chose to follow, and they headed to the new cemetery of St. Ouen, which the locals have ominously and mournfully named Cayenne. In total, there were ten mourners.
‘Well, we two shall be the only old friends,’ repeated Bongrand as he walked on beside Sandoz.
‘Well, we two will be the only old friends,’ repeated Bongrand as he walked on beside Sandoz.
The procession, preceded by the mourning coach in which the priest and the choirboy were seated, now descended the other side of the height, along winding streets as precipitous as mountain paths. The horses of the hearse slipped over the slimy pavement; one could hear the wheels jolting noisily. Right behind, the ten mourners took short and careful steps, trying to avoid the puddles, and being so occupied with the difficulty of the descent that they refrained from speaking. But at the bottom of the Rue du Ruisseau, when they reached the Porte de Clignancourt and the vast open spaces, where the boulevard running round the city, the circular railway, the talus and moat of the fortifications are displayed to view, there came sighs of relief, a few words were exchanged, and the party began to straggle.
The procession, led by the mourning coach where the priest and choirboy were sitting, now went down the other side of the hill, along winding streets as steep as mountain trails. The horses pulling the hearse slipped on the slick pavement; the wheels could be heard clattering loudly. Right behind, the ten mourners stepped carefully, trying to avoid the puddles, so focused on the tricky descent that they didn't speak. But when they reached the bottom of Rue du Ruisseau, arriving at Porte de Clignancourt and the wide open spaces, where the boulevard circles the city, the circular railway, and the banks and moat of the fortifications are visible, they sighed in relief, exchanged a few words, and the group began to break apart.
Sandoz and Bongrand by degrees found themselves behind all the others, as if they had wished to isolate themselves from those folk whom they had never previously seen. Just as the hearse was passing the city gate, the painter leant towards the novelist.
Sandoz and Bongrand gradually found themselves behind everyone else, as if they had wanted to distance themselves from the people they had never seen before. Just as the hearse was passing through the city gate, the painter leaned toward the novelist.
‘And the little woman, what is going to be done with her?’
‘And what’s going to happen to the little woman?’
‘Ah! how dreadful it is!’ replied Sandoz. ‘I went to see her yesterday at the hospital. She has brain fever. The house doctor maintains that they will save her, but that she will come out of it ten years older and without any strength. Do you know that she had come to such a point that she no longer knew how to spell. Such a crushing fall, a young lady abased to the level of a drudge! Yes, if we don’t take care of her like a cripple, she will end by becoming a scullery-maid somewhere.’
‘Oh! how terrible it is!’ replied Sandoz. ‘I visited her yesterday at the hospital. She has a brain fever. The doctor says they’ll save her, but she’ll come out of it ten years older and weak. Do you realize that she got to a point where she couldn’t even spell? Such a devastating fall, a young woman reduced to the level of a servant! Yes, if we don’t take care of her like she’s a cripple, she’ll end up being a kitchen maid somewhere.’
‘And not a copper, of course?’
‘And not a penny, of course?’
‘Not a copper. I thought I should find the studies Claude made from nature for his large picture, those superb studies which he afterwards turned to such poor account. But I ferreted everywhere; he gave everything away; people robbed him. No, nothing to sell, not a canvas that could be turned to profit, nothing but that huge picture, which I demolished and burnt with my own hands, and right gladly, I assure you, even as one avenges oneself.’
‘Not a cent. I thought I’d find the studies Claude made from nature for his big painting, those amazing studies that he later wasted. But I searched everywhere; he gave everything away; people stole from him. No, nothing to sell, not a canvas that could make money, nothing but that huge painting, which I destroyed and burned myself, and I did it with great pleasure, I assure you, just like one takes revenge.’
They became silent for a moment. The broad road leading to St. Ouen stretched out quite straight as far as the eye could reach; and over the plain went the procession, pitifully small, lost, as it were, on that highway, along which there flowed a river of mud. A line of palings bordered it on either side, waste land extended both to right and left, while afar off one only saw some factory chimneys and a few lofty white houses, standing alone, obliquely to the road. They passed through the Clignancourt fête, with booths, circuses, and roundabouts on either side, all shivering in the abandonment of winter, empty dancing cribs, mouldy swings, and a kind of stage homestead, ‘The Picardy Farm,’ looking dismally sad between its broken fences.
They fell silent for a moment. The wide road leading to St. Ouen stretched out straight as far as the eye could see; and over the plain moved the procession, pitifully small, seemingly lost on that highway, along which ran a river of mud. A line of wooden stakes bordered it on both sides, with wasteland extending to the right and left, while in the distance, you could only see a few factory chimneys and a couple of tall white houses standing alone, angled to the road. They passed through the Clignancourt fair, with booths, circuses, and carousels on either side, all shivering in the emptiness of winter, vacant dancing platforms, moldy swings, and a kind of stage named ‘The Picardy Farm,’ looking dismally sad between its broken fences.
‘Ah! his old canvases,’ resumed Bongrand, ‘the things he had at the Quai de Bourbon, do you remember them? There were some extraordinary bits among them. The landscapes he brought back from the south and the academy studies he painted at Boutin’s—a girl’s legs and a woman’s trunk, for instance. Oh, that trunk! Old Malgras must have it. A magisterial study it was, which not one of our “young masters” could paint. Yes, yes, the fellow was no fool—simply a great painter.’
‘Ah! His old paintings,’ Bongrand continued, ‘the ones he had at the Quai de Bourbon, do you remember those? There were some amazing pieces among them. The landscapes he brought back from the south and the studies he did at Boutin’s—a girl’s legs and a woman’s torso, for example. Oh, that torso! Old Malgras must have it. It was a masterful study that none of our “young masters” could replicate. Yes, yes, the guy was no fool—just a great artist.’
‘When I think,’ said Sandoz, ‘that those little humbugs of the School and the press accused him of idleness and ignorance, repeating one after the other that he had always refused to learn his art. Idle! good heavens! why, I have seen him faint with fatigue after sittings ten hours long; he gave his whole life to his work, and killed himself in his passion for toil! And they call him ignorant—how idiotic! They will never understand that the individual gift which a man brings in his nature is superior to all acquired knowledge. Delacroix also was ignorant of his profession in their eyes, simply because he could not confine himself to hard and fast rules! Ah! the ninnies, the slavish pupils who are incapable of painting anything incorrectly!’
‘When I think,’ said Sandoz, ‘that those little phonies in the School and the press accused him of laziness and ignorance, repeating one after another that he always refused to learn his craft. Lazy! Good grief! I’ve seen him faint from exhaustion after ten-hour sessions; he devoted his entire life to his work and pushed himself to the limit with his passion for it! And they call him ignorant—how ridiculous! They’ll never get that the natural talent a person has is greater than any learned skill. Delacroix was also considered ignorant in their eyes just because he couldn’t stick to strict rules! Ah! The fools, the obedient students who can’t paint anything remotely wrong!’
He took a few steps in silence, and then he added:
He took a few steps quietly, and then he added:
‘A heroic worker, too—a passionate observer whose brain was crammed with science—the temperament of a great artist endowed with admirable gifts. And to think that he leaves nothing, nothing!’
‘A heroic worker too—a passionate observer whose mind was packed with science—the temperament of a great artist gifted with amazing talents. And to think that he leaves nothing, nothing!’
‘Absolutely nothing, not a canvas,’ declared Bongrand. ‘I know nothing of his but rough drafts, sketches, notes carelessly jotted down, as it were, all that artistic paraphernalia which can’t be submitted to the public. Yes, indeed, it is really a dead man, dead completely, who is about to be lowered into the grave.’
‘Absolutely nothing, not a single canvas,’ Bongrand stated. ‘All I have are rough drafts, sketches, and notes hastily written down, you know, all that artistic stuff that can’t be shown to the public. Yes, it’s true, it’s really a dead man, completely dead, who is about to be buried.’
However, the painter and the novelist now had to hasten their steps, for they had got far behind the others while talking; and the hearse, after rolling past taverns and shops full of tombstones and crosses, was turning to the right into the short avenue leading to the cemetery. They overtook it, and passed through the gateway with the little procession. The priest in his surplice and the choirboy carrying the holy water receiver, who had both alighted from the mourning coach, walked on ahead.
However, the painter and the novelist now had to quicken their pace, as they had fallen behind the others while chatting; and the hearse, after rolling past bars and shops filled with gravestones and crosses, was turning right into the short avenue that leads to the cemetery. They caught up to it and entered the gateway with the small procession. The priest in his white robe and the choirboy holding the holy water container, who had both gotten out of the mourning coach, walked ahead.
It was a large flat cemetery, still in its youth, laid out by rule and line in the suburban waste land, and divided into squares by broad symmetrical paths. A few raised tombs bordered the principal avenues, but most of the graves, already very numerous, were on a level with the soil. They were hastily arranged temporary sepulchres, for five-year grants were the only ones to be obtained, and families hesitated to go to any serious expense. Thus, the stones sinking into the ground for lack of foundations, the scrubby evergreens which had not yet had time to grow, all the provisional slop kind of mourning that one saw there, imparted to that vast field of repose a look of poverty and cold, clean, dismal bareness like that of a barracks or a hospital. There was not a corner to be found recalling the graveyard nooks sung of in the ballads of the romantic period, not one leafy turn quivering with mystery, not a single large tomb speaking of pride and eternity. You were in the new style of Paris cemetery, where everything is set out straight and duly numbered—the cemetery of democratic times, where the dead seem to slumber at the bottom of an office drawer, after filing past one by one, as people do at a fête under the eyes of the police, so as to avoid obstruction.
It was a large, flat cemetery, still pretty new, laid out in tidy rows in the suburban wasteland, and divided into squares by wide, straight paths. A few elevated tombs lined the main roads, but most of the graves, already quite numerous, were level with the ground. They were hastily arranged temporary graves, as only five-year permits were available, and families were reluctant to spend much money. As a result, the stones were sinking into the earth due to a lack of foundations, the scraggly evergreens hadn’t had the time to grow, and the overall makeshift mourning present created a look of poverty and cold, clean, dismal barrenness, similar to that of a barracks or a hospital. There wasn’t a single corner reminiscent of the graveyard niches celebrated in romantic ballads, not one leafy path shimmering with mystery, not a single grand tomb embodying pride and eternity. You found yourself in the new style of Paris cemetery, where everything is laid out straight and properly numbered—the cemetery of democratic times, where the dead seem to slumber at the bottom of an office drawer after passing by one by one, just like people do at a festival under the watchful eyes of the police, to prevent any obstruction.
‘Dash it!’ muttered Bongrand, ‘it isn’t lively here.’
‘Darn it!’ muttered Bongrand, ‘it isn’t lively here.’
‘Why not?’ asked Sandoz. ‘It’s commodious; there is plenty of air. And even although there is no sun, see what a pretty colour it all has.’
‘Why not?’ asked Sandoz. ‘It’s spacious; there’s plenty of air. And even though there’s no sun, look at how lovely the color is.’
In fact, under the grey sky of that November morning, in the penetrating quiver of the wind, the low tombs, laden with garlands and crowns of beads, assumed soft tints of charming delicacy. There were some quite white, and others all black, according to the colour of the beads. But the contrast lost much of its force amid the pale green foliage of the dwarfish trees. Poor families exhausted their affection for the dear departed in decking those five-year grants; there were piles of crowns and blooming flowers—freshly brought there on the recent Day of the Dead. Only the cut flowers had as yet faded, between their paper collars. Some crowns of yellow immortelles shone out like freshly chiselled gold. But the beads predominated to such a degree that at the first glance there seemed to be nothing else; they gushed forth everywhere, hiding the inscriptions and covering the stones and railings. There were beads forming hearts, beads in festoons and medallions, beads framing either ornamental designs or objects under glass, such as velvet pansies, wax hands entwined, satin bows, or, at times, even photographs of women—yellow, faded, cheap photographs, showing poor, ugly, touching faces that smiled awkwardly.
In fact, under the gray sky of that November morning, with the biting chill of the wind, the low tombs, decorated with garlands and beaded crowns, took on soft shades of delicate beauty. Some were pure white, while others were completely black, depending on the color of the beads. However, the contrast seemed less striking against the pale green leaves of the small trees. Poor families poured all their love for their dearly departed into decorating those five-year markers; there were heaps of crowns and blooming flowers—freshly brought there on the recent Day of the Dead. Only the cut flowers had begun to wilt, trapped in their paper collars. Some crowns of yellow immortelles gleamed like freshly carved gold. But the beads were so dominant that at first glance, it seemed like nothing else existed; they spilled out everywhere, obscuring the inscriptions and covering the stones and railings. There were beads shaped into hearts, beads strung in festoons and medallions, beads framing either decorative designs or objects under glass, like velvet pansies, wax hands intertwined, satin bows, or sometimes even photographs of women—yellowed, faded, cheap photographs, depicting poor, unattractive, yet poignant faces that smiled awkwardly.
As the hearse proceeded along the Avenue du Rond Point, Sandoz, whose last remark—since it was of an artistic nature—had brought him back to Claude, resumed the conversation, saying:
As the hearse moved down the Avenue du Rond Point, Sandoz, whose last comment—being related to art—had made him think of Claude, picked up the conversation again, saying:
‘This is a cemetery which he would have understood, he who was so mad on modern things. No doubt he suffered physically, wasted away by the over-severe lesion that is so often akin to genius, “three grains too little, or three grains too much, of some substance in the brain,” as he himself said when he reproached his parents for his constitution. However, his disorder was not merely a personal affair, he was the victim of our period. Yes, our generation has been soaked in romanticism, and we have remained impregnated with it. It is in vain that we wash ourselves and take baths of reality, the stain is obstinate, and all the scrubbing in the world won’t take it away.’
‘This is a cemetery that he would have understood, he who was so obsessed with modern things. No doubt he suffered physically, worn down by the harsh affliction that is often linked to genius, “three grains too little, or three grains too much, of some substance in the brain,” as he himself said when he blamed his parents for his condition. However, his struggle wasn’t just a personal issue; he was a product of our time. Yes, our generation has been soaked in romanticism, and we've remained influenced by it. It’s useless to try and wash it off and take baths in reality; the stain is stubborn, and all the scrubbing in the world won’t remove it.’
Bongrand smiled. ‘Oh! as for romanticism,’ said he, ‘I’m up to my ears in it. It has fed my art, and, indeed, I’m impenitent. If it be true that my final impotence is due to that, well, after all, what does it matter? I can’t deny the religion of my artistic life. However, your remark is quite correct; you other fellows, you are rebellious sons. Claude, for instance, with his big nude woman amid the quays, that extravagant symbol—’
Bongrand smiled. "Oh! When it comes to romanticism," he said, "I'm completely immersed in it. It's fueled my art, and honestly, I have no regrets. If it's true that my ultimate struggle comes from that, well, what does it matter? I can't deny the passion of my artistic life. But you're right; you others, you're the rebellious ones. Take Claude, for example, with his large nude woman by the quays, that over-the-top symbol—"
‘Ah, that woman!’ interrupted Sandoz, ‘it was she who throttled him! If you knew how he worshipped her! I was never able to cast her out of him. And how can one possibly have clear perception, a solid, properly-balanced brain when such phantasmagoria sprouts forth from your skull? Though coming after yours, our generation is too imaginative to leave healthy work behind it. Another generation, perhaps two, will be required before people will be able to paint and write logically, with the high, pure simplicity of truth. Truth, nature alone, is the right basis, the necessary guide, outside of which madness begins; and the toiler needn’t be afraid of flattening his work, his temperament is there, which will always carry him sufficiently away. Does any one dream of denying personality, the involuntary thumb-stroke which deforms whatever we touch and constitutes our poor creativeness?’
‘Ah, that woman!’ interrupted Sandoz, ‘she was the one who choked him! If you only knew how much he adored her! I could never get her out of his head. And how can anyone truly think clearly or have a balanced mind when such wild fantasies come from your thoughts? Our generation, coming after yours, is too imaginative to create healthy work. It will take another generation, maybe two, before people can paint and write clearly, with the high, pure simplicity of truth. Only truth—nature itself—is the proper foundation, the essential guide; outside of that, madness starts. And the worker shouldn’t worry about dulling his work; his personality will always carry him away enough. Does anyone really think we can deny personality, that unavoidable mark we leave on everything we touch that shapes our limited creativity?’
However, he turned his head, and involuntarily added:
However, he turned his head and couldn't help but add:
‘Hallo! what’s burning? Are they lighting bonfires here?’
‘Hey! What’s burning? Are they having bonfires here?’
The procession had turned on reaching the Rond Point, where the ossuary was situated—the common vault gradually filled with all the remnants removed from the graves, and the stone slab of which, in the centre of a circular lawn, disappeared under a heap of wreaths, deposited there by the pious relatives of those who no longer had an individual resting-place. And, as the hearse rolled slowly to the left in transversal Avenue No. 2, there had come a sound of crackling, and thick smoke had risen above the little plane trees bordering the path. Some distance ahead, as the party approached, they could see a large pile of earthy things beginning to burn, and they ended by understanding. The fire was lighted at the edge of a large square patch of ground, which had been dug up in broad parallel furrows, so as to remove the coffins before allotting the soil to other corpses; just as the peasant turns the stubble over before sowing afresh. The long empty furrows seemed to yawn, the mounds of rich soil seemed to be purifying under the broad grey sky; and the fire thus burning in that corner was formed of the rotten wood of the coffins that had been removed—slit, broken boards, eaten into by the earth, often reduced to a ruddy humus, and gathered together in an enormous pile. They broke up with faint detonations, and being damp with human mud, they refused to flame, and merely smoked with growing intensity. Large columns of the smoke rose into the pale sky, and were beaten down by the November wind, and torn into ruddy shreds, which flew across the low tombs of quite one half of the cemetery.
The procession turned when they reached the Rond Point, where the ossuary was located—the communal vault gradually filled with all the remains taken from the graves, and the stone slab in the center of a circular lawn was buried under a pile of wreaths left by the devoted relatives of those without a personal resting place. As the hearse slowly rolled to the left on Avenue No. 2, there was a sound of crackling and thick smoke rose above the small plane trees lining the path. Ahead, as they approached, they could see a large mound of earth starting to burn, and they eventually figured it out. The fire was lit at the edge of a large area that had been dug up in broad parallel grooves to remove the coffins before the soil was assigned to new bodies, just like a farmer turns the stubble before replanting. The long empty furrows seemed to gape, and the mounds of rich soil appeared to be cleansing under the wide gray sky; the fire burning in that corner was made of the rotting wood from the removed coffins—splintered, broken boards, eaten away by the earth, often reduced to a reddish humus, gathered into a massive pile. They popped softly with faint explosions, and being soaked with human muck, they wouldn't catch fire and just smoked more intensely. Large plumes of smoke rose into the pale sky, were pushed down by the November wind, and torn into red shreds that flew across the low graves covering half of the cemetery.
Sandoz and Bongrand had looked at the scene without saying a word. Then, having passed the fire, the former resumed:
Sandoz and Bongrand stood in silence, taking in the scene. After they passed the fire, Sandoz spoke up again:
‘No, he did not prove to be the man of the formula he laid down. I mean that his genius was not clear enough to enable him to set that formula erect and impose it upon the world by a definite masterpiece. And now see how other fellows scatter their efforts around him, after him! They go no farther than roughing off, they give us mere hasty impressions, and not one of them seems to have strength enough to become the master who is awaited. Isn’t it irritating, this new notion of light, this passion for truth carried as far as scientific analysis, this evolution begun with so much originality, and now loitering on the way, as it were, falling into the hands of tricksters, and never coming to a head, simply because the necessary man isn’t born? But pooh! the man will be born; nothing is ever lost, light must be.’
‘No, he didn’t turn out to be the person he claimed to be. I mean that his brilliance wasn’t sharp enough to allow him to uphold that idea and establish it in the world with a definitive masterpiece. And now look at how others spread their efforts around him, following after him! They only go as far as scratching the surface, giving us just quick impressions, and none of them seem strong enough to be the master we’re waiting for. Isn’t it frustrating, this new concept of light, this desire for truth taken to the point of scientific analysis, this evolution that started with so much originality but is now stalling, getting caught up with con artists, and never coming to fruition, simply because the right person hasn’t arisen? But pfft! The right person will come; nothing is ever lost, light has to exist.’
‘Who knows? not always,’ said Bongrand. ‘Life miscarries, like everything else. I listen to you, you know, but I’m a despairer. I am dying of sadness, and I feel that everything else is dying. Ah! yes, there is something unhealthy in the atmosphere of the times—this end of a century is all demolition, a litter of broken monuments, and soil that has been turned over and over a hundred times, the whole exhaling a stench of death! Can anybody remain in good health amid all that? One’s nerves become unhinged, the great neurosis is there, art grows unsettled, there is general bustling, perfect anarchy, all the madness of self-love at bay. Never have people quarrelled more and seen less clearly than since it is pretended that one knows everything.’
“Who knows? Not always,” Bongrand said. “Life falls apart, just like everything else. I listen to you, but I’m someone who’s lost hope. I’m dying of sadness, and it feels like everything else is dying too. Ah! Yes, there’s something unhealthy in the air these days—this end of the century is all about destruction, a mess of broken monuments and soil that’s been turned over a hundred times, all giving off the smell of death! How can anyone stay healthy amid all that? Your nerves get frayed, the great anxiety is here, art gets unstable, and there’s a constant chaos, complete anarchy, all the madness of self-importance running rampant. People have never argued more and understood less than they do now that everyone acts like they know everything.”
Sandoz, who had grown pale, watched the large ruddy coils of smoke rolling in the wind.
Sandoz, who had gotten pale, watched the big red curls of smoke drifting in the wind.
‘It was fated,’ he mused in an undertone. ‘Our excessive activity and pride of knowledge were bound to cast us back into doubt. This century, which has already thrown so much light over the world, was bound to finish amid the threat of a fresh flow of darkness—yes, our discomfort comes from that! Too much has been promised, too much has been hoped for; people have looked forward to the conquest and explanation of everything, and now they growl impatiently. What! don’t things go quicker than that? What! hasn’t science managed to bring us absolute certainty, perfect happiness, in a hundred years? Then what is the use of going on, since one will never know everything, and one’s bread will always be as bitter? It is as if the century had become bankrupt, as if it had failed; pessimism twists people’s bowels, mysticism fogs their brains; for we have vainly swept phantoms away with the light of analysis, the supernatural has resumed hostilities, the spirit of the legends rebels and wants to conquer us, while we are halting with fatigue and anguish. Ah! I certainly don’t affirm anything; I myself am tortured. Only it seems to me that this last convulsion of the old religious terrors was to be foreseen. We are not the end, we are but a transition, a beginning of something else. It calms me and does me good to believe that we are marching towards reason, and the substantiality of science.’
‘It was meant to be,’ he thought quietly. ‘Our intense activity and overconfidence in our knowledge were sure to lead us back into uncertainty. This century, which has already illuminated so much of the world, was destined to end with the threat of new darkness—yes, that's where our discomfort comes from! Too much has been promised, too much has been expected; people have looked forward to conquering and explaining everything, and now they grumble impatiently. What! Can’t things move faster? What! Hasn’t science been able to give us absolute certainty, perfect happiness, in a hundred years? Then what’s the point of continuing, since we’ll never know everything, and life will always have its hardships? It feels as if this century has gone bankrupt, as if it has failed; pessimism twists people’s insides, mysticism clouds their minds; for we have futilely tried to dispel illusions with the light of analysis, the supernatural has resumed its attacks, the spirit of the legends fights back and wants to take over us, while we are exhausted and distressed. Ah! I certainly don’t claim to know anything; I, too, am tormented. Yet, it feels to me that this last upheaval of old religious fears was to be expected. We are not the end; we are merely a transition, the beginning of something else. It comforts me and makes me feel better to believe that we are moving towards reason and the solidity of science.’
His voice had become husky with emotion, and he added:
His voice had gotten thick with emotion, and he added:
‘That is, unless madness plunges us, topsy-turvy, into night again, and we all go off throttled by the ideal, like our old friend who sleeps there between his four boards.’
‘That is, unless madness throws us into chaos again, and we all get choked up by the ideal, like our old friend who lies there between his four boards.’
The hearse was leaving transversal Avenue No. 2 to turn, on the right, into lateral Avenue No. 3, and the painter, without speaking, called the novelist’s attention to a square plot of graves, beside which the procession was now passing.
The hearse was leaving Transversal Avenue No. 2 to turn right onto Lateral Avenue No. 3, and the painter, without saying a word, pointed out a square plot of graves to get the novelist's attention, right as the procession was passing by.
There was here a children’s cemetery, nothing but children’s tombs, stretching far away in orderly fashion, separated at regular intervals by narrow paths, and looking like some infantile city of death. There were tiny little white crosses, tiny little white railings, disappearing almost beneath an efflorescence of white and blue wreaths, on a level with the soil; and that peaceful field of repose, so soft in colour, with the bluish tint of milk about it, seemed to have been made flowery by all the childhood lying in the earth. The crosses recorded various ages, two years, sixteen months, five months. One poor little cross, destitute of any railing, was out of line, having been set up slantingly across a path, and it simply bore the words: ‘Eugenie, three days.’ Scarcely to exist as yet, and withal to sleep there already, alone, on one side, like the children who on festive occasions dine at a little side table!
There was a children's cemetery, with nothing but children's graves, stretching out in a neat row, separated by narrow paths and resembling a little city of death. There were tiny white crosses and small white railings, almost disappearing under a sea of white and blue wreaths, level with the ground; that peaceful resting place, soft in color, with a bluish tint like milk, looked like it had been decorated by all the childhood buried beneath the soil. The crosses marked various ages: two years, sixteen months, five months. One lonely cross, without a railing, was out of line, standing crookedly across a path, and simply read: ‘Eugenie, three days.’ Still barely existing and already sleeping there, alone, on one side, like the children who, on festive occasions, sit at a little side table!
However, the hearse had at last stopped, in the middle of the avenue; and when Sandoz saw the grave ready at the corner of the next division, in front of the cemetery of the little ones, he murmured tenderly:
However, the hearse finally came to a stop in the middle of the street; and when Sandoz saw the grave prepared at the corner of the next section, in front of the children's cemetery, he murmured softly:
‘Ah! my poor old Claude, with your big child’s heart, you will be in your place beside them.’
‘Ah! my poor old Claude, with your big childlike heart, you will belong beside them.’
The under-bearers removed the coffin from the hearse. The priest, who looked surly, stood waiting in the wind; some sextons were there with their shovels. Three neighbours had fallen off on the road, the ten had dwindled into seven. The second cousin, who had been holding his hat in his hand since leaving the church, despite the frightful weather, now drew nearer. All the others uncovered, and the prayers were about to begin, when a loud piercing whistle made everybody look up.
The pallbearers took the coffin out of the hearse. The priest, who looked grumpy, stood waiting in the wind; some grave diggers were there with their shovels. Three neighbors had dropped off along the way, so the group shrank from ten to seven. The second cousin, who had been holding his hat in his hand since leaving the church, despite the terrible weather, moved closer. Everyone else had taken off their hats, and the prayers were about to start when a loud, piercing whistle made everyone look up.
Beyond this corner of the cemetery as yet untenanted, at the end of lateral Avenue No. 3, a train was passing along the high embankment of the circular railway which overlooked the graveyard. The grassy slope rose up, and a number of geometrical lines, as it were, stood out blackly against the grey sky; there were telegraph-posts, connected by thin wires, a superintendent’s box, and a red signal plate, the only bright throbbing speck visible. When the train rolled past, with its thunder-crash, one plainly distinguished, as on the transparency of a shadow play, the silhouettes of the carriages, even the heads of the passengers showing in the light gaps left by the windows. And the line became clear again, showing like a simple ink stroke across the horizon; while far away other whistles called and wailed unceasingly, shrill with anger, hoarse with suffering, or husky with distress. Then a guard’s horn resounded lugubriously.
Beyond this empty corner of the cemetery at the end of Avenue No. 3, a train was rolling along the high embankment of the circular railway that overlooked the graveyard. The grassy slope rose up, and several geometric shapes stood out starkly against the grey sky; there were telegraph poles connected by thin wires, a supervisor's booth, and a red signal plate, the only bright spot visible. As the train thundered by, you could clearly see, like in a shadow play, the silhouettes of the carriages and even the heads of the passengers appearing in the light gaps of the windows. Then the line was clear again, like a simple ink stroke across the horizon, while distant whistles called and wailed continuously, sharp with anger, hoarse with pain, or raspy with distress. Then a guard's horn echoed mournfully.
‘Revertitur in terram suam unde erat,’ recited the priest, who had opened a book and was making haste.
He returns to the earth from which he came, recited the priest, who had opened a book and was rushing.
But he was not heard, for a large engine had come up puffing, and was manoeuvring backwards and forwards near the funeral party. It had a loud thick voice, a guttural whistle, which was intensely mournful. It came and went, panting; and seen in profile it looked like a heavy monster. Suddenly, moreover, it let off steam, with all the furious blowing of a tempest.
But he wasn't heard, because a large engine had arrived, puffing and moving back and forth near the funeral party. It had a loud, deep voice, a guttural whistle that was extremely mournful. It came and went, panting; and seen from the side, it looked like a heavy monster. Suddenly, it also released steam, with all the violent blowing of a storm.
‘Requiescat in pace,’ said the priest.
Rest in peace, said the priest.
‘Amen,’ replied the choirboy.
"Amen," replied the choirboy.
But the words were again lost amid the lashing, deafening detonation, which was prolonged with the continuous violence of a fusillade.
But the words were once again drowned out by the pounding, deafening explosion, which stretched on with the relentless fury of gunfire.
Bongrand, quite exasperated, turned towards the engine. It became silent, fortunately, and every one felt relieved. Tears had risen to the eyes of Sandoz, who had already been stirred by the words which had involuntarily passed his lips, while he walked behind his old comrade, talking as if they had been having one of their familiar chats of yore; and now it seemed to him as if his youth were about to be consigned to the earth. It was part of himself, the best part, his illusions and his enthusiasm, which the sextons were taking away to lower into the depths. At that terrible moment an accident occurred which increased his grief. It had rained so hard during the preceding days, and the ground was so soft, that a sudden subsidence of soil took place. One of the sextons had to jump into the grave and empty it with his shovel with a slow rhythmical movement. There was no end to the matter, the funeral seemed likely to last for ever amid the impatience of the priest and the interest of the four neighbours who had followed on to the end, though nobody could say why. And up above, on the embankment, the engine had begun manoeuvring again, retreating and howling at each turn of its wheels, its fire-box open the while, and lighting up the gloomy scene with a rain of sparks.
Bongrand, quite frustrated, turned toward the engine. It fell silent, thankfully, and everyone felt relieved. Tears welled up in Sandoz's eyes, stirred by the words that had slipped out as he walked behind his old friend, talking like they were having one of their usual conversations from the past; now it felt like his youth was being buried. It was a part of him, the best part, his dreams and his enthusiasm, that the gravediggers were taking away to lower into the ground. At that painful moment, something happened that deepened his sorrow. It had rained heavily over the previous days, and the ground was so soft that a sudden sinkhole formed. One of the gravediggers had to jump into the grave and shovel it out with slow, steady movements. There seemed to be no end to it; the funeral felt like it would go on forever amid the impatience of the priest and the curiosity of the four neighbors who had lingered until the end, though nobody knew why. And up above, on the embankment, the engine had started moving again, reversing and howling with each turn of its wheels, its fire-box open, lighting up the gloomy scene with a shower of sparks.
At last the pit was emptied, the coffin lowered, and the aspergillus passed round. It was all over. The second cousin, standing erect, did the honours with his correct, pleasant air, shaking hands with all these people whom he had never previously seen, in memory of the relative whose name he had not remembered the day before.
At last, the pit was cleared, the coffin was lowered, and the aspergillus was passed around. It was all done. The second cousin, standing tall, took care of the guests with his polite, friendly demeanor, shaking hands with everyone he had never met before, in honor of the relative whose name he hadn’t recalled the day before.
‘That linen-draper is a very decent fellow,’ said Bongrand, who was swallowing his tears.
‘That linen seller is a really decent guy,’ said Bongrand, who was fighting back his tears.
‘Quite so,’ replied Sandoz, sobbing.
"Exactly," replied Sandoz, sobbing.
All the others were going off, the surplices of the priest and the choirboy disappeared between the green trees, while the straggling neighbours loitered reading the inscriptions on the surrounding tombs.
All the others were leaving, the priest's and choirboy's robes vanished among the green trees, while the lingering neighbors hung around reading the inscriptions on the nearby tombstones.
Then Sandoz, making up his mind to leave the grave, which was now half filled, resumed:
Then Sandoz, deciding to leave the grave, which was now half filled, continued:
‘We alone shall have known him. There is nothing left of him, not even a name!’
‘We alone will have known him. There’s nothing left of him, not even a name!’
‘He is very happy,’ said Bongrand; ‘he has no picture on hand, in the earth where he sleeps. It is as well to go off as to toil as we do merely to turn out infirm children, who always lack something, their legs or their head, and who don’t live.’
‘He is really happy,’ said Bongrand; ‘he doesn’t have a picture in the ground where he rests. It’s just as good to leave as it is to work hard like we do just to bring into the world sickly kids, who always seem to be missing something, like their legs or their heads, and who don’t survive.’
‘Yes, one must really be wanting in pride to resign oneself to turning out merely approximate work and resorting to trickery with life. I, who bestow every care on my books—I despise myself, for I feel that, despite all my efforts, they are incomplete and untruthful.’
‘Yes, you really have to lack pride to settle for doing just average work and to cheat in life. I, who put so much effort into my books—I hate myself because, no matter how hard I try, they still feel incomplete and dishonest.’
With pale faces, they slowly went away, side by side, past the children’s white tombs, the novelist then in all the strength of his toil and fame, the painter declining but covered with glory.
With pale faces, they slowly walked away, side by side, past the children's white tombstones, the novelist at the height of his hard work and fame, the painter fading but still surrounded by glory.
‘There, at least, lies one who was logical and brave,’ continued Sandoz; ‘he confessed his powerlessness and killed himself.’
‘There, at least, is someone who was logical and courageous,’ Sandoz continued; ‘he admitted his helplessness and took his own life.’
‘That’s true,’ said Bongrand; ‘if we didn’t care so much for our skins we should all do as he has done, eh?’
"That's true," Bongrand said, "if we didn't care so much about ourselves, we'd all do what he did, right?"
‘Well, yes; since we cannot create anything, since we are but feeble copyists, we might as well put an end to ourselves at once.’
‘Well, yes; since we can’t create anything, since we’re just weak imitators, we might as well end it all now.’
Again they found themselves before the burning pile of old rotten coffins, now fully alight, sweating and crackling; but there were still no flames to be seen, the smoke alone had increased—a thick acrid smoke, which the wind carried along in whirling coils, so that it now covered the whole cemetery as with a cloud of mourning.
Again they found themselves in front of the burning pile of old, decaying coffins, now completely ablaze, sweating and crackling; but there were still no visible flames—only the smoke had intensified—a thick, pungent smoke that the wind blew along in swirling spirals, covering the entire cemetery like a shroud of sorrow.
‘Dash it! Eleven o’clock!’ said Bongrand, after pulling out his watch. ‘I must get home again.’
‘Darn it! It’s eleven o’clock!’ said Bongrand, after checking his watch. ‘I need to get home again.’
Sandoz gave an exclamation of surprise:
Sandoz exclaimed in shock:
‘What, already eleven?’
"Wait, it's already eleven?"
Over the low-lying graves, over the vast bead-flowered field of death, so formal of aspect and so cold, he cast a long look of despair, his eyes still bedimmed by his tears. And then he added:
Over the low-lying graves, over the expansive field of flowers marking the dead, so formal in appearance and so cold, he gazed long in despair, his eyes still clouded by tears. And then he added:
‘Let’s go to work.’
"Let's get to work."
THE END
THE END
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