This is a modern-English version of The Enchanted April, originally written by Von Arnim, Elizabeth. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

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The Enchanted April

by Elizabeth Von Arnim


Chapter 1

It began in a Woman’s Club in London on a February afternoon—an uncomfortable club, and a miserable afternoon—when Mrs. Wilkins, who had come down from Hampstead to shop and had lunched at her club, took up The Times from the table in the smoking-room, and running her listless eye down the Agony Column saw this:

It started in a women's club in London on a February afternoon—an uncomfortable club and a dreary afternoon—when Mrs. Wilkins, who had come down from Hampstead to shop and had eaten lunch at her club, picked up The Times from the table in the smoking room, and casually scanning the Agony Column, saw this:

To Those who Appreciate Wistaria and Sunshine. Small mediaeval Italian Castle on the shores of the Mediterranean to be Let Furnished for the month of April. Necessary servants remain. Z, Box 1000, The Times.

To Those who Appreciate Wisteria and Sunshine. Small medieval Italian Castle on the shores of the Mediterranean available for rent furnished for the month of April. Necessary staff will remain. Z, Box 1000, The Times.

That was its conception; yet, as in the case of many another, the conceiver was unaware of it at the moment.

That was the idea behind it; however, like many others, the person who conceived it didn't realize it at that moment.

So entirely unaware was Mrs. Wilkins that her April for that year had then and there been settled for her that she dropped the newspaper with a gesture that was both irritated and resigned, and went over to the window and stared drearily out at the dripping street.

So completely unaware was Mrs. Wilkins that her plans for April that year had just been decided for her that she dropped the newspaper with a gesture that was both annoyed and resigned, and went over to the window to stare glumly out at the wet street.

Not for her were mediaeval castles, even those that are specially described as small. Not for her the shores in April of the Mediterranean, and the wistaria and sunshine. Such delights were only for the rich. Yet the advertisement had been addressed to persons who appreciate these things, so that it had been, anyhow, addressed too to her, for she certainly appreciated them; more than anybody knew; more than she had ever told. But she was poor. In the whole world she possessed of her very own only ninety pounds, saved from year to year, put by carefully pound by pound, out of her dress allowance. She had scraped this sum together at the suggestion of her husband as a shield and refuge against a rainy day. Her dress allowance, given her by her father, was £100 a year, so that Mrs. Wilkins’s clothes were what her husband, urging her to save, called modest and becoming, and her acquaintance to each other, when they spoke of her at all, which was seldom for she was very negligible, called a perfect sight.

Not for her were medieval castles, even the ones that are specifically called small. Not for her the Mediterranean shores in April, along with the wisteria and sunshine. Those kinds of pleasures were only for the wealthy. Still, the advertisement had been aimed at people who appreciate these things, so it had, in any case, been aimed at her too, because she definitely appreciated them; more than anyone knew; more than she had ever shared. But she was poor. In the entire world, she had only ninety pounds saved up from year to year, put aside carefully pound by pound from her clothing allowance. She had collected this amount at her husband’s suggestion as a safety net against a rainy day. Her clothing allowance, given to her by her father, was £100 a year, so Mrs. Wilkins’s clothes were what her husband, encouraging her to save, called modest and flattering, and her acquaintances, when they talked about her at all—which was rarely since she was quite forgettable—called a perfect sight.

Mr. Wilkins, a solicitor, encouraged thrift, except that branch of it which got into his food. He did not call that thrift, he called it bad housekeeping. But for the thrift which, like moth, penetrated into Mrs. Wilkins’s clothes and spoilt them, he had much praise. “You never know,” he said, “when there will be a rainy day, and you may be very glad to find you have a nest-egg. Indeed we both may.”

Mr. Wilkins, a lawyer, promoted saving money, except when it came to his food. He didn’t see that as saving; he called it poor housekeeping. However, he often praised the saving that, like moths, damaged Mrs. Wilkins’s clothes. “You never know,” he said, “when a rainy day will come, and you might be really glad to have a little savings set aside. In fact, we both might.”

Looking out of the club window into Shaftesbury Avenue—hers was an economical club, but convenient for Hampstead, where she lived, and for Shoolbred’s, where she shopped—Mrs. Wilkins, having stood there some time very drearily, her mind’s eye on the Mediterranean in April, and the wistaria, and the enviable opportunities of the rich, while her bodily eye watched the really extremely horrible sooty rain falling steadily on the hurrying umbrellas and splashing omnibuses, suddenly wondered whether perhaps this was not the rainy day Mellersh—Mellersh was Mr. Wilkins—had so often encouraged her to prepare for, and whether to get out of such a climate and into the small mediaeval castle wasn’t perhaps what Providence had all along intended her to do with her savings. Part of her savings, of course; perhaps quite a small part. The castle, being mediaeval, might also be dilapidated, and dilapidations were surely cheap. She wouldn’t in the least mind a few of them, because you didn’t pay for dilapidations which were already there; on the contrary—by reducing the price you had to pay they really paid you. But what nonsense to think of it . . .

Looking out of the club window onto Shaftesbury Avenue—hers was a budget-friendly club, but it was convenient for Hampstead, where she lived, and for Shoolbred’s, where she shopped—Mrs. Wilkins stood there for a while feeling quite dreary, her mind imagining the Mediterranean in April, the wisteria, and the enviable opportunities of the wealthy, while her eyes observed the incredibly grimy rain falling steadily on the rushing umbrellas and splashing buses. Suddenly, she wondered if this was the rainy day Mellersh—Mellersh was Mr. Wilkins—had often told her to prepare for, and whether escaping such a climate and heading to the small medieval castle was what Providence had meant for her to do with her savings all along. A portion of her savings, of course; probably just a small portion. The castle, being medieval, might also be run-down, and repairs were surely inexpensive. She wouldn’t mind a few of them at all, because you didn’t pay for repairs that were already there; on the contrary—by lowering the price you had to pay, they really did pay you. But what nonsense to think of it...

She turned away from the window with the same gesture of mingled irritation and resignation with which she had laid down The Times, and crossed the room towards the door with the intention of getting her mackintosh and umbrella and fighting her way into one of the overcrowded omnibuses and going to Shoolbred’s on her way home and buying some soles for Mellersh’s dinner—Mellersh was difficult with fish and liked only soles, except salmon—when she beheld Mrs. Arbuthnot, a woman she knew by sight as also living in Hampstead and belonging to the club, sitting at the table in the middle of the room on which the newspapers and magazines were kept, absorbed, in her turn, in the first page of The Times.

She turned away from the window with a mix of irritation and resignation, just like when she had put down The Times, and crossed the room towards the door. She planned to grab her raincoat and umbrella, then tackle the crowded buses to get to Shoolbred’s on her way home to buy some soles for Mellersh’s dinner—Mellersh was picky with fish and only liked soles, except for salmon—when she noticed Mrs. Arbuthnot, a woman she recognized as also living in Hampstead and belonging to the club, sitting at the table in the middle of the room where the newspapers and magazines were kept, completely focused on the first page of The Times.

Mrs. Wilkins had never yet spoken to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who belonged to one of the various church sets, and who analysed, classified, divided and registered the poor; whereas she and Mellersh, when they did go out, went to the parties of impressionist painters, of whom in Hampstead there were many. Mellersh had a sister who had married one of them and lived up on the Heath, and because of this alliance Mrs. Wilkins was drawn into a circle which was highly unnatural to her, and she had learned to dread pictures. She had to say things about them, and she didn’t know what to say. She used to murmur, “Marvellous,” and feel that it was not enough. But nobody minded. Nobody listened. Nobody took any notice of Mrs. Wilkins. She was the kind of person who is not noticed at parties. Her clothes, infested by thrift, made her practically invisible; her face was non-arresting; her conversation was reluctant; she was shy. And if one’s clothes and face and conversation are all negligible, thought Mrs. Wilkins, who recognised her disabilities, what, at parties, is there left of one?

Mrs. Wilkins had never spoken to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was part of one of the various church groups and who analyzed, classified, divided, and kept track of the poor. In contrast, she and Mellersh, when they went out, attended the gatherings of impressionist painters, of whom there were many in Hampstead. Mellersh had a sister who married one of them and lived up on the Heath, and because of this connection, Mrs. Wilkins found herself in a social circle that felt completely unnatural to her, and she had come to dread art. She had to say things about the paintings, but she didn’t know what to say. She would mumble, “Marvellous,” and feel that it wasn’t enough. But nobody cared. Nobody listened. Nobody paid any attention to Mrs. Wilkins. She was the type of person who remained unnoticed at parties. Her thrift-store clothes made her practically invisible; her face was forgettable; her conversation was hesitant; she was shy. And if one’s clothes, face, and conversation are all insignificant, thought Mrs. Wilkins, who was aware of her shortcomings, what is left of a person at parties?

Also she was always with Wilkins, that clean-shaven, fine-looking man, who gave a party, merely by coming to it, a great air. Wilkins was very respectable. He was known to be highly thought of by his senior partners. His sister’s circle admired him. He pronounced adequately intelligent judgments on art and artists. He was pithy; he was prudent; he never said a word too much, nor, on the other hand, did he ever say a word too little. He produced the impression of keeping copies of everything he said; and he was so obviously reliable that it often happened that people who met him at these parties became discontented with their own solicitors, and after a period of restlessness extricated themselves and went to Wilkins.

She was always with Wilkins, that clean-shaven, good-looking guy who brought a certain vibe to any party just by being there. Wilkins had a solid reputation. He was well-respected by his senior partners and admired by his sister’s friends. He offered smart and thoughtful opinions on art and artists. He was concise and sensible; he never spoke too much or too little. It seemed like he kept track of everything he said, and he was so clearly trustworthy that people who met him at these parties often felt unsatisfied with their own lawyers and eventually decided to switch to Wilkins.

Naturally Mrs. Wilkins was blotted out. “She,” said his sister, with something herself of the judicial, the digested, and the final in her manner, “should stay at home.” But Wilkins could not leave his wife at home. He was a family solicitor, and all such have wives and show them. With his in the week he went to parties, and with his on Sundays he went to church. Being still fairly young—he was thirty-nine—and ambitious of old ladies, of whom he had not yet acquired in his practice a sufficient number, he could not afford to miss church, and it was there that Mrs. Wilkins became familiar, though never through words, with Mrs. Arbuthnot.

Naturally, Mrs. Wilkins was ignored. “She,” said his sister, with a tone that was somewhat authoritative and final, “should stay home.” But Wilkins couldn't leave his wife at home. He was a family lawyer, and all family lawyers have wives and bring them along. During the week, he went to parties with his wife, and on Sundays he took her to church. At thirty-nine and still fairly young, he was eager to impress older women, having not yet built a sufficient number of connections in his practice. He couldn’t afford to skip church, and it was there that Mrs. Wilkins quietly got to know Mrs. Arbuthnot, though never through conversation.

She saw her marshalling the children of the poor into pews. She would come in at the head of the procession from the Sunday School exactly five minutes before the choir, and get her boys and girls neatly fitted into their allotted seats, and down on their little knees in their preliminary prayer, and up again on their feet just as, to the swelling organ, the vestry door opened, and the choir and clergy, big with the litanies and commandments they were presently to roll out, emerged. She had a sad face, yet she was evidently efficient. The combination used to make Mrs. Wilkins wonder, for she had been told by Mellersh, on days when she had only been able to get plaice, that if one were efficient one wouldn’t be depressed, and that if one does one’s job well one becomes automatically bright and brisk.

She saw her directing the poor children into the pews. She would walk in at the front of the procession from the Sunday School exactly five minutes before the choir, getting her boys and girls neatly placed in their assigned seats, down on their little knees for their opening prayer, and back up on their feet just as the vestry door opened to the sound of the swelling organ, and the choir and clergy, loaded with the litanies and commandments they were about to deliver, appeared. She had a sad expression, yet she was clearly efficient. This combination used to make Mrs. Wilkins wonder, as Mellersh had told her, on days when she could only get plaice, that if someone was efficient, they wouldn't feel down, and that if one does their job well, they automatically become cheerful and lively.

About Mrs. Arbuthnot there was nothing bright and brisk, though much in her way with the Sunday School children that was automatic; but when Mrs. Wilkins, turning from the window, caught sight of her in the club she was not being automatic at all, but was looking fixedly at one portion of the first page of The Times, holding the paper quite still, her eyes not moving. She was just staring; and her face, as usual, was the face of a patient and disappointed Madonna.

About Mrs. Arbuthnot, there was nothing lively or cheerful, though she often interacted with the Sunday School children in a routine way; but when Mrs. Wilkins, turning from the window, spotted her in the club, she wasn’t being routine at all. Instead, she was intently focused on one section of the first page of The Times, holding the paper perfectly still, her eyes locked in place. She was just staring; and her expression, as always, resembled that of a weary and disheartened Madonna.

Obeying an impulse she wondered at even while obeying it, Mrs. Wilkins, the shy and the reluctant, instead of proceeding as she had intended to the cloakroom and from thence to Schoolbred’s in search of Mellersh’s fish, stopped at the table and sat down exactly opposite Mrs. Arbuthnot, to whom she had never yet spoken in her life.

Obeying an impulse that surprised her, Mrs. Wilkins, who was shy and hesitant, decided not to go to the cloakroom and then to Schoolbred’s to look for Mellersh’s fish as she had planned. Instead, she stopped at the table and sat down directly across from Mrs. Arbuthnot, a woman she had never spoken to before.

It was one of those long, narrow refectory tables, so that they were quite close to each other.

It was one of those long, narrow dining tables, so they were pretty close to each other.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, however, did not look up. She continued to gaze, with eyes that seemed to be dreaming, at one spot only of The Times.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, however, didn’t look up. She kept staring, with a dreamy look in her eyes, at just one spot in The Times.

Mrs. Wilkins watched her a minute, trying to screw up courage to speak to her. She wanted to ask her if she had seen the advertisement. She did not know why she wanted to ask her this, but she wanted to. How stupid not to be able to speak to her. She looked so kind. She looked so unhappy. Why couldn’t two unhappy people refresh each other on their way through this dusty business of life by a little talk—real, natural talk, about what they felt, what they would have liked, what they still tried to hope? And she could not help thinking that Mrs. Arbuthnot, too, was reading that very same advertisement. Her eyes were on the very part of the paper. Was she, too, picturing what it would be like—the colour, the fragrance, the light, the soft lapping of the sea among little hot rocks? Colour, fragrance, light, sea; instead of Shaftesbury Avenue, and the wet omnibuses, and the fish department at Shoolbred’s, and the Tube to Hampstead, and dinner, and to-morrow the same and the day after the same and always the same . . .

Mrs. Wilkins watched her for a moment, trying to gather the courage to speak. She wanted to ask if she had seen the ad. She didn't know why she felt the urge to ask, but she did. It felt so silly not to be able to talk to her. She seemed so kind and so unhappy. Why couldn’t two unhappy people lift each other's spirits just a bit with real, natural conversation about their feelings, their wishes, and their hopes? She couldn’t help but think that Mrs. Arbuthnot was also reading that same advertisement. Her eyes were on the exact spot in the paper. Was she, too, imagining what it would be like—the colors, the scents, the light, the gentle waves lapping against warm rocks? Colors, scents, light, sea; instead of Shaftesbury Avenue, the damp buses, the fish counter at Shoolbred’s, the Tube to Hampstead, dinner, and then the same thing tomorrow and the day after that, always the same...

Suddenly Mrs. Wilkins found herself leaning across the table. “Are you reading about the mediaeval castle and the wistaria?” she heard herself asking.

Suddenly, Mrs. Wilkins found herself leaning across the table. “Are you reading about the medieval castle and the wisteria?” she heard herself asking.

Naturally Mrs. Arbuthnot was surprised; but she was not half so much surprised as Mrs. Wilkins was at herself for asking.

Naturally, Mrs. Arbuthnot was surprised; but she was nowhere near as surprised as Mrs. Wilkins was at herself for asking.

Mrs. Arbuthnot had not yet to her knowledge set eyes on the shabby, lank, loosely-put-together figure sitting opposite her, with its small freckled face and big grey eyes almost disappearing under a smashed-down wet-weather hat, and she gazed at her a moment without answering. She was reading about the mediaeval castle and the wistaria, or rather had read about it ten minutes before, and since then had been lost in dreams—of light, of colour, of fragrance, of the soft lapping of the sea among little hot rocks . . .

Mrs. Arbuthnot had never seen the scruffy, thin, poorly put-together figure sitting across from her, with its small freckled face and large grey eyes almost hidden under a squashed wet-weather hat, and she stared at her for a moment without responding. She had been reading about the medieval castle and the wisteria, or rather had read about it ten minutes earlier, and since then had been lost in daydreams—of light, of color, of fragrance, of the gentle lapping of the sea against warm rocks . . .

“Why do you ask me that?” she said in her grave voice, for her training of and by the poor had made her grave and patient.

“Why do you ask me that?” she said in her serious voice, as her work with the poor had made her solemn and patient.

Mrs. Wilkins flushed and looked excessively shy and frightened. “Oh, only because I saw it too, and I thought perhaps—I thought somehow—” she stammered.

Mrs. Wilkins blushed and appeared very shy and scared. “Oh, it’s just that I saw it too, and I thought maybe—I thought somehow—” she stammered.

Whereupon Mrs. Arbuthnot, her mind being used to getting people into lists and divisions, from habit considered, as she gazed thoughtfully at Mrs. Wilkins, under what heading, supposing she had to classify her, she could most properly be put.

Whereupon Mrs. Arbuthnot, used to sorting people into categories out of habit, considered thoughtfully as she looked at Mrs. Wilkins under what label, if she had to classify her, she could best place her.

“And I know you by sight,” went on Mrs. Wilkins, who, like all the shy, once she was started plunged on, frightening herself to more and more speech by the sheer sound of what she had said last in her ears. “Every Sunday—I see you every Sunday in church—”

“And I know you by sight,” continued Mrs. Wilkins, who, like all shy people, once she started, kept talking, scaring herself into saying more just from the sound of her last words in her ears. “Every Sunday—I see you every Sunday in church—”

“In church?” echoed Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“In church?” echoed Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“And this seems such a wonderful thing—this advertisement about the wistaria—and—”

“And this really seems like such a wonderful thing—this ad about the wistaria—and—”

Mrs. Wilkins, who must have been at least thirty, broke off and wriggled in her chair with the movement of an awkward and embarrassed schoolgirl.

Mrs. Wilkins, who had to be at least thirty, stopped speaking and shifted in her chair like an awkward and embarrassed schoolgirl.

“It seems so wonderful,” she went on in a kind of burst, “and—it is such a miserable day . . .”

“It seems so amazing,” she continued in a sudden outburst, “and—it’s such a terrible day . . .”

And then she sat looking at Mrs. Arbuthnot with the eyes of an imprisoned dog.

And then she sat looking at Mrs. Arbuthnot like a caged dog.

“This poor thing,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot, whose life was spent in helping and alleviating, “needs advice.”

“This poor thing,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot, who dedicated her life to helping and alleviating others, “needs advice.”

She accordingly prepared herself patiently to give it.

She patiently got ready to give it.

“If you see me in church,” she said, kindly and attentively, “I suppose you live in Hampstead too?”

“If you see me at church,” she said, kindly and attentively, “I guess you live in Hampstead too?”

“Oh yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins. And she repeated, her head on its long thin neck drooping a little as if the recollection of Hampstead bowed her, “Oh yes.”

“Oh yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins. And she repeated, her head on its long thin neck drooping a little as if the memory of Hampstead weighed her down, “Oh yes.”

“Where?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, who, when advice was needed, naturally first proceeded to collect the facts.

“Where?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, who, when she needed advice, instinctively started by gathering the facts.

But Mrs. Wilkins, laying her hand softly and caressingly on the part of The Times where the advertisement was, as though the mere printed words of it were precious, only said, “Perhaps that’s why this seems so wonderful.”

But Mrs. Wilkins, gently placing her hand on the section of The Times with the advertisement, as if the printed words themselves were valuable, simply said, “Maybe that’s why this feels so amazing.”

“No—I think that’s wonderful anyhow,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, forgetting facts and faintly sighing.

“No—I think that’s wonderful anyway,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, forgetting the facts and letting out a soft sigh.

“Then you were reading it?”

“Then you are reading it?”

“Yes,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, her eyes going dreamy again.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, her eyes glazing over again.

“Wouldn’t it be wonderful?” murmured Mrs. Wilkins.

“Wouldn’t it be amazing?” whispered Mrs. Wilkins.

“Wonderful,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. Her face, which had lit up, faded into patience again. “Very wonderful,” she said. “But it’s no use wasting one’s time thinking of such things.”

“Wonderful,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. Her face, which had lit up, faded back to a look of patience. “Very wonderful,” she said. “But it’s no use wasting time thinking about such things.”

“Oh, but it is,” was Mrs. Wilkins’s quick, surprising reply; surprising because it was so much unlike the rest of her—the characterless coat and skirt, the crumpled hat, the undecided wisp of hair straggling out. “And just the considering of them is worth while in itself—such a change from Hampstead—and sometimes I believe—I really do believe—if one considers hard enough one gets things.”

“Oh, but it is,” was Mrs. Wilkins’s quick, surprising reply; surprising because it was so different from the rest of her—the plain coat and skirt, the wrinkled hat, the uncertain strand of hair sticking out. “And just thinking about them is worthwhile in itself—such a change from Hampstead—and sometimes I believe—I really do believe—if you think hard enough, you can get things.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot observed her patiently. In what category would she, supposing she had to, put her?

Mrs. Arbuthnot watched her patiently. If she had to, which category would she place her in?

“Perhaps,” she said, leaning forward a little, “you will tell me your name. If we are to be friends”—she smiled her grave smile—“as I hope we are, we had better begin at the beginning.”

“Maybe,” she said, leaning in slightly, “you could tell me your name. If we’re going to be friends”—she smiled her serious smile—“which I hope we will, we should start from the beginning.”

“Oh yes—how kind of you. I’m Mrs. Wilkins,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “I don’t expect,” she added, flushing, as Mrs. Arbuthnot said nothing, “that it conveys anything to you. Sometimes it—it doesn’t seem to convey anything to me either. But”—she looked round with a movement of seeking help—“I am Mrs. Wilkins.”

“Oh yes—how nice of you. I’m Mrs. Wilkins,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “I don’t think,” she added, blushing, as Mrs. Arbuthnot stayed silent, “that it means anything to you. Sometimes it—it doesn’t seem to mean anything to me either. But”—she looked around as if looking for assistance—“I am Mrs. Wilkins.”

She did not like her name. It was a mean, small name, with a kind of facetious twist, she thought, about its end like the upward curve of a pugdog’s tail. There it was, however. There was no doing anything with it. Wilkins she was and Wilkins she would remain; and though her husband encouraged her to give it on all occasions as Mrs. Mellersh-Wilkins she only did that when he was within earshot, for she thought Mellersh made Wilkins worse, emphasising it in the way Chatsworth on the gate-posts of a villa emphasises the villa.

She didn't like her name. It felt petty and small, with a bit of a sarcastic twist at the end, like the upward curl of a pug's tail. But that was that. She couldn't change it. Wilkins was her name, and Wilkins was what she would always be; even though her husband encouraged her to go by Mrs. Mellersh-Wilkins everywhere, she only did that when he was nearby. She thought Mellersh made Wilkins sound worse, highlighting it like Chatsworth on the gateposts of a villa draws attention to the villa itself.

When first he suggested she should add Mellersh she had objected for the above reason, and after a pause—Mellersh was much too prudent to speak except after a pause, during which presumably he was taking a careful mental copy of his coming observation—he said, much displeased, “But I am not a villa,” and looked at her as he looks who hopes, for perhaps the hundredth time, that he may not have married a fool.

When he first suggested that she should include Mellersh, she had objected for the reasons mentioned above, and after a pause—Mellersh was always too careful to speak without thinking first, probably considering his next words—he said, clearly annoyed, “But I am not a villa,” and looked at her with the same hope as always, that he hadn’t married a fool.

Of course he was not a villa, Mrs. Wilkins assured him; she had never supposed he was; she had not dreamed of meaning . . . she was only just thinking . . .

Of course he wasn't a villa, Mrs. Wilkins assured him; she had never thought he was; she hadn’t even considered meaning . . . she was just thinking . . .

The more she explained the more earnest became Mellersh’s hope, familiar to him by this time, for he had then been a husband for two years, that he might not by any chance have married a fool; and they had a prolonged quarrel, if that can be called a quarrel which is conducted with dignified silence on one side and earnest apology on the other, as to whether or no Mrs. Wilkins had intended to suggest that Mr. Wilkins was a villa.

The more she explained, the more Mellersh’s hope grew—something he was quite used to by then, having been a husband for two years—that he hadn’t accidentally married someone foolish. They ended up having a long argument, if you can call it an argument when one side is quietly dignified and the other side is sincerely apologetic, about whether Mrs. Wilkins meant to imply that Mr. Wilkins was a villa.

“I believe,” she had thought when it was at last over—it took a long while—“that anybody would quarrel about anything when they’ve not left off being together for a single day for two whole years. What we both need is a holiday.”

“I believe,” she thought when it was finally over—it took a long time—“that anybody would argue about anything when they haven’t spent a single day apart in two whole years. What we both need is a vacation.”

“My husband,” went on Mrs. Wilkins to Mrs. Arbuthnot, trying to throw some light on herself, “is a solicitor. He—” She cast about for something she could say elucidatory of Mellersh, and found: “He’s very handsome.”

“My husband,” continued Mrs. Wilkins to Mrs. Arbuthnot, trying to shed some light on herself, “is a lawyer. He—” She searched for something she could say to explain Mellersh, and concluded with, “He’s very attractive.”

“Well,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot kindly, “that must be a great pleasure to you.”

“Well,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said kindly, “that must be great for you.”

“Why?” asked Mrs. Wilkins.

“Why?” asked Mrs. Wilkins.

“Because,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, a little taken aback, for constant intercourse with the poor had accustomed her to have her pronouncements accepted without question, “because beauty—handsomeness—is a gift like any other, and if it is properly used—”

“Because,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, a bit surprised, since being around the poor had made her used to her statements being taken without question, “because beauty—good looks—is a gift like any other, and if it is used properly—”

She trailed off into silence. Mrs. Wilkins’s great grey eyes were fixed on her, and it seemed suddenly to Mrs. Arbuthnot that perhaps she was becoming crystallised into a habit of exposition, and of exposition after the manner of nursemaids, through having an audience that couldn’t but agree, that would be afraid, if it wished, to interrupt, that didn’t know, that was, in fact, at her mercy.

She fell silent. Mrs. Wilkins’s big gray eyes were locked onto her, and suddenly, Mrs. Arbuthnot thought that maybe she was getting stuck in a routine of explaining things, in the way that nursemaids do, because she had an audience that couldn’t help but agree, that would be too timid to interrupt if it wanted to, that didn’t really know, and was, in fact, at her mercy.

But Mrs. Wilkins was not listening; for just then, absurd as it seemed, a picture had flashed across her brain, and there were two figures in it sitting together under a great trailing wistaria that stretched across the branches of a tree she didn’t know, and it was herself and Mrs. Arbuthnot—she saw them—she saw them. And behind them, bright in sunshine, were old grey walls—the mediaeval castle—she saw it—they were there . . .

But Mrs. Wilkins wasn’t paying attention; at that moment, as strange as it sounded, an image popped into her mind, featuring two people sitting together beneath a sprawling wisteria that cascaded over the branches of an unfamiliar tree. It was her and Mrs. Arbuthnot—she could see them—she could see them. And behind them, glowing in the sunlight, were old gray walls—the medieval castle—she could see it—they were there . . .

She therefore stared at Mrs. Arbuthnot and did not hear a word she said. And Mrs. Arbuthnot stared too at Mrs. Wilkins, arrested by the expression on her face, which was swept by the excitement of what she saw, and was as luminous and tremulous under it as water in sunlight when it is ruffled by a gust of wind. At this moment, if she had been at a party, Mrs. Wilkins would have been looked at with interest.

She stared at Mrs. Arbuthnot and didn't catch a single word she said. Mrs. Arbuthnot also stared at Mrs. Wilkins, captivated by the look on her face, which was glowing with the excitement of what she saw and seemed as bright and trembling as sunlight reflecting off water disturbed by a breeze. At that moment, if they had been at a party, everyone would have been watching Mrs. Wilkins with curiosity.

They stared at each other; Mrs. Arbuthnot surprised, inquiringly, Mrs. Wilkins with the eyes of some one who has had a revelation. Of course. That was how it could be done. She herself, she by herself, couldn’t afford it, and wouldn’t be able, even if she could afford it, to go there all alone; but she and Mrs. Arbuthnot together . . .

They looked at each other; Mrs. Arbuthnot was surprised and curious, while Mrs. Wilkins had the look of someone who just had a breakthrough. Of course. That was how it could work. She alone couldn't afford it, and even if she could, she wouldn't want to go by herself; but if she and Mrs. Arbuthnot went together...

She leaned across the table. “Why don’t we try and get it?” she whispered.

She leaned across the table. “Why don’t we go for it?” she whispered.

Mrs. Arbuthnot became even more wide-eyed. “Get it?” she repeated.

Mrs. Arbuthnot became even more wide-eyed. “Do you get it?” she repeated.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins, still as though she were afraid of being overheard. “Not just sit here and say How wonderful, and then go home to Hampstead without having put out a finger—go home just as usual and see about the dinner and the fish just as we’ve been doing for years and years and will go on doing for years and years. In fact,” said Mrs. Wilkins, flushing to the roots of her hair, for the sound of what she was saying, of what was coming pouring out, frightened her, and yet she couldn’t stop, “I see no end to it. There is no end to it. So that there ought to be a break, there ought to be intervals—in everybody’s interests. Why, it would really be being unselfish to go away and be happy for a little, because we would come back so much nicer. You see, after a bit everybody needs a holiday.”

“Yes,” Mrs. Wilkins said, still sounding like she was worried about being overheard. “Not just sitting here and saying how wonderful it is, then going back to Hampstead without lifting a finger—just going home like we always do and dealing with dinner and the fish just like we’ve been doing for years and years, and will keep doing for years to come. In fact,” Mrs. Wilkins said, her face turning red from what she was saying, the words pouring out frightened her, and yet she couldn’t help it, “I don’t see any end to it. There is no end to it. So there really should be a break, there should be some time off—for everyone’s sake. Honestly, it’d be kind of selfless to go away and be happy for a little while, because we would come back much nicer. You see, after a while everyone needs a holiday.”

“But—how do you mean, get it?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“But—what do you mean, get it?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Take it,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

"Take it," Mrs. Wilkins said.

“Take it?”

"Take this?"

“Rent it. Hire it. Have it.”

“Rent it. Hire it. Get it.”

“But—do you mean you and I?”

"But—are you talking about you and me?"

“Yes. Between us. Share. Then it would only cost half, and you look so—you look exactly as if you wanted it just as much as I do—as if you ought to have a rest—have something happy happen to you.”

“Yes. Let’s split it. Then it would only cost half, and you look so—you look like you want it just as much as I do—as if you need a break—need something good to happen to you.”

“Why, but we don’t know each other.”

“Why, we don’t know each other.”

“But just think how well we would if we went away together for a month! And I’ve saved for a rainy day, and I expect so have you, and this is the rainy day—look at it—”

“But just think how well we would do if we went away together for a month! And I’ve saved for a rainy day, and I expect you have too, and this is the rainy day—look at it—”

“She is unbalanced,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot; yet she felt strangely stirred.

"She's unstable," thought Mrs. Arbuthnot; yet she felt oddly moved.

“Think of getting away for a whole month—from everything—to heaven—”

“Imagine escaping for an entire month—from everything—to paradise—”

“She shouldn’t say things like that,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot. “The vicar—” Yet she felt strangely stirred. It would indeed be wonderful to have a rest, a cessation.

“She shouldn’t say things like that,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot. “The vicar—” Yet she felt oddly moved. It would truly be amazing to have a break, a pause.

Habit, however, steadied her again; and years of intercourse with the poor made her say, with the slight though sympathetic superiority of the explainer, “But then, you see, heaven isn’t somewhere else. It is here and now. We are told so.”

Habit, however, steadied her again; and years of interaction with the poor made her say, with a slight but sympathetic air of superiority typical of someone explaining things, “But then, you see, heaven isn’t somewhere else. It is here and now. We’re told that.”

She became very earnest, just as she did when trying patiently to help and enlighten the poor. “Heaven is within us,” she said in her gentle low voice. “We are told that on the very highest authority. And you know the lines about the kindred points, don’t you—”

She became very serious, just like when she was patiently trying to help and enlighten the less fortunate. “Heaven is within us,” she said in her soft, low voice. “We are told that by the highest authority. And you know the lines about the related points, don’t you—”

“Oh yes, I know them,” interrupted Mrs. Wilkins impatiently.

“Oh yes, I know them,” Mrs. Wilkins interrupted, sounding impatient.

“The kindred points of heaven and home,” continued Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was used to finishing her sentences. “Heaven is in our home.”

“The similar points of heaven and home,” continued Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was accustomed to completing her sentences. “Heaven is in our home.”

“It isn’t,” said Mrs. Wilkins, again surprisingly.

“It isn't,” Mrs. Wilkins said again, sounding surprised.

Mrs. Arbuthnot was taken aback. Then she said gently, “Oh, but it is. It is there if we choose, if we make it.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot was surprised. Then she said softly, “Oh, but it is. It's there if we choose, if we create it.”

“I do choose, and I do make it, and it isn’t,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“I choose, and I make it happen, and it’s not,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

Then Mrs. Arbuthnot was silent, for she too sometimes had doubts about homes. She sat and looked uneasily at Mrs. Wilkins, feeling more and more the urgent need to getting her classified. If she could only classify Mrs. Wilkins, get her safely under her proper heading, she felt that she herself would regain her balance, which did seem very strangely to be slipping all to one side. For neither had she had a holiday for years, and the advertisement when she saw it had set her dreaming, and Mrs. Wilkins’s excitement about it was infectious, and she had the sensation, as she listened to her impetuous, odd talk and watched her lit-up face, that she was being stirred out of sleep.

Then Mrs. Arbuthnot fell silent, as she too sometimes questioned the idea of homes. She sat there, feeling increasingly uneasy as she looked at Mrs. Wilkins, feeling a growing need to figure her out. If she could just categorize Mrs. Wilkins and get her neatly sorted, she believed it would help her regain her own sense of balance, which oddly seemed to be tipping to one side. She hadn't taken a vacation in years, and seeing the advertisement had sparked her imagination, while Mrs. Wilkins's excitement about it was contagious. As she listened to her impulsive, quirky conversation and watched her animated face, she felt like she was being awakened from a deep sleep.

Clearly Mrs. Wilkins was unbalanced, but Mrs. Arbuthnot had met the unbalanced before—indeed she was always meeting them—and they had no effect on her own stability at all; whereas this one was making her feel quite wobbly, quite as though to be off and away, away from her compass points of God, Husband, Home and Duty—she didn’t feel as if Mrs. Wilkins intended Mr. Wilkins to come too—and just for once be happy, would be both good and desirable. Which of course it wasn’t; which certainly of course it wasn’t. She, also, had a nest-egg, invested gradually in the Post Office Savings Bank, but to suppose that she would ever forget her duty to the extent of drawing it out and spending it on herself was surely absurd. Surely she couldn’t, she wouldn’t ever do such a thing? Surely she wouldn’t, she couldn’t ever forget her poor, forget misery and sickness as completely as that? No doubt a trip to Italy would be extraordinarily delightful, but there were many delightful things one would like to do, and what was strength given to one for except to help one not to do them?

Clearly, Mrs. Wilkins was unstable, but Mrs. Arbuthnot had dealt with unstable people before—she was always encountering them—and they never affected her own balance at all; yet this one was making her feel quite shaky, almost as if she wanted to leave behind her guiding principles of God, Husband, Home, and Duty—she didn’t feel like Mrs. Wilkins wanted Mr. Wilkins to come along too—and just for once being happy seemed both good and desirable. Which, of course, it wasn’t; certainly, it wasn’t. She, too, had a savings fund, gradually built up in the Post Office Savings Bank, but the idea that she would ever neglect her responsibility to the point of withdrawing it and spending it on herself was clearly ridiculous. Surely she couldn’t, she wouldn’t ever do something like that? Surely she wouldn’t, she couldn’t ever forget about her poor, forget misery and sickness completely like that? No doubt a trip to Italy would be incredibly enjoyable, but there were many enjoyable things she would like to do, and what was strength given to her for except to help her avoid doing them?

Steadfast as the points of the compass to Mrs. Arbuthnot were the great four facts of life: God, Husband, Home, Duty. She had gone to sleep on these facts years ago, after a period of much misery, her head resting on them as on a pillow; and she had a great dread of being awakened out of so simple and untroublesome a condition. Therefore it was that she searched with earnestness for a heading under which to put Mrs. Wilkins, and in this way illumine and steady her own mind; and sitting there looking at her uneasily after her last remark, and feeling herself becoming more and more unbalanced and infected, she decided pro tem, as the vicar said at meetings, to put her under the heading Nerves. It was just possible that she ought to go straight into the category Hysteria, which was often only the antechamber to Lunacy, but Mrs. Arbuthnot had learned not to hurry people into their final categories, having on more than one occasion discovered with dismay that she had made a mistake; and how difficult it had been to get them out again, and how crushed she had been with the most terrible remorse.

Steadfast as the points of the compass to Mrs. Arbuthnot were the four major facts of life: God, Husband, Home, Duty. She had fallen asleep on these facts years ago, after a time of great misery, her head resting on them like a pillow; and she was deeply afraid of being shaken out of such a simple and peaceful state. That's why she earnestly searched for a label to classify Mrs. Wilkins, hoping to clarify and stabilize her own thoughts; and sitting there, looking at her anxiously after her last comment, and feeling herself becoming more and more unsettled and influenced, she decided pro tem, as the vicar said at meetings, to categorize her under Nerves. It was possible that she should go straight into Hysteria, which often was just a step away from Lunacy, but Mrs. Arbuthnot had learned not to rush people into their final categories, having discovered with dismay on more than one occasion that she had made a mistake; and how hard it had been to help them out again, and how deeply she had felt the most terrible remorse.

Yes. Nerves. Probably she had no regular work for others, thought Mrs. Arbuthnot; no work that would take her outside herself. Evidently she was rudderless—blown about by gusts, by impulses. Nerves was almost certainly her category, or would be quite soon if no one helped her. Poor little thing, thought Mrs. Arbuthnot, her own balance returning hand in hand with her compassion, and unable, because of the table, to see the length of Mrs. Wilkins’s legs. All she saw was her small, eager, shy face, and her thin shoulders, and the look of childish longing in her eyes for something that she was sure was going to make her happy. No; such things didn’t make people happy, such fleeting things. Mrs. Arbuthnot had learned in her long life with Frederick—he was her husband, and she had married him at twenty and was now thirty-three—where alone true joys are to be found. They are to be found, she now knew, only in daily, in hourly, living for others; they are to be found only—hadn’t she over and over again taken her disappointments and discouragements there, and come away comforted?—at the feet of God.

Yes. Nerves. Mrs. Arbuthnot thought she probably didn't have a regular job or commitments that connected her to the outside world. Clearly, she was directionless—tossed around by whims and impulses. "Nerves" was likely her diagnosis, or it would be soon if no one stepped in to help her. Poor thing, Mrs. Arbuthnot thought, feeling her own sense of balance return along with her compassion, unable to see the full length of Mrs. Wilkins's legs due to the table. All she noticed was her small, eager, shy face, her thin shoulders, and the look of childlike longing in her eyes for something she believed would make her happy. No; those kinds of things didn't bring true happiness, those fleeting pleasures. Mrs. Arbuthnot had learned throughout her long life with Frederick—her husband whom she married at twenty and was now thirty-three—where true joy is actually found. She now understood that it can only be discovered in the daily, even hourly, act of living for others; it can only be found—hadn’t she repeatedly taken her disappointments and discouragements there and left feeling comforted?—at the feet of God.

Frederick had been the kind of husband whose wife betakes herself early to the feet of God. From him to them had been a short though painful step. It seemed short to her in retrospect, but it had really taken the whole of the first year of their marriage, and every inch of the way had been a struggle, and every inch of it was stained, she felt at the time, with her heart’s blood. All that was over now. She had long since found peace. And Frederick, from her passionately loved bridegroom, from her worshipped young husband, had become second only to God on her list of duties and forbearances. There he hung, the second in importance, a bloodless thing bled white by her prayers. For years she had been able to be happy only by forgetting happiness. She wanted to stay like that. She wanted to shut out everything that would remind her of beautiful things, that might set her off again longing, desiring....

Frederick had been the kind of husband who made his wife turn to God early on. The distance from him to them had been short but painful. In hindsight, it felt quick to her, but it actually took the entire first year of their marriage, and every step was a struggle, stained, as she felt at the time, with her heart's blood. That was all behind her now. She had found peace long ago. And Frederick, once her passionately loved groom and cherished young husband, had become second only to God on her list of responsibilities and tolerances. There he stood, second in importance, a lifeless thing drained of vitality by her prayers. For years, she had managed to find happiness only by forgetting what it meant to be happy. She wanted to stay that way. She wanted to block out everything that would remind her of beautiful things, anything that might stir up longing or desire again.

“I’d like so much to be friends,” she said earnestly. “Won’t you come and see me, or let me come to you sometimes? Whenever you feel as if you wanted to talk. I’ll give you my address”—she searched in her handbag—“and then you won’t forget.” And she found a card and held it out.

“I’d really love to be friends,” she said sincerely. “Won’t you come visit me, or let me come to you sometimes? Whenever you feel like talking. I’ll give you my address”—she rummaged through her handbag—“so you won’t forget.” Then she found a card and handed it to him.

Mrs. Wilkins ignored the card.

Mrs. Wilkins dismissed the card.

“It’s so funny,” said Mrs. Wilkins, just as if she had not heard her, “but I see us both—you and me—this April in the mediaeval castle.”

“It’s so funny,” said Mrs. Wilkins, acting like she hadn’t heard her, “but I see us both—you and me—this April in the medieval castle.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot relapsed into uneasiness. “Do you?” she said, making an effort to stay balanced under the visionary gaze of the shining grey eyes. “Do you?”

Mrs. Arbuthnot fell back into a sense of unease. “Do you?” she asked, trying to keep her composure under the intense gaze of the bright gray eyes. “Do you?”

“Don’t you ever see things in a kind of flash before they happen?” asked Mrs. Wilkins.

“Don’t you ever get a glimpse of things before they happen?” asked Mrs. Wilkins.

“Never,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

"Never," Mrs. Arbuthnot said.

She tried to smile; she tried to smile the sympathetic yet wise and tolerant smile with which she was accustomed to listen to the necessarily biassed and incomplete views of the poor. She didn’t succeed. The smile trembled out.

She attempted to smile; she tried to give that sympathetic yet wise and understanding smile she usually wore while listening to the biased and incomplete opinions of the less fortunate. She didn’t succeed. The smile faltered.

“Of course,” she said in a low voice, almost as if she were afraid the vicar and the Savings Bank were listening, “it would be most beautiful—most beautiful—”

“Of course,” she said in a quiet voice, almost as if she were worried the vicar and the Savings Bank were listening, “it would be so beautiful—so beautiful—”

“Even if it were wrong,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “it would only be for a month.”

“Even if it was wrong,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “it would only be for a month.”

“That—” began Mrs. Arbuthnot, quite clear as to the reprehensibleness of such a point of view; but Mrs. Wilkins stopped her before she could finish.

“That—” started Mrs. Arbuthnot, fully aware of how unacceptable that perspective was; but Mrs. Wilkins interrupted her before she could complete her thought.

“Anyhow,” said Mrs. Wilkins, stopping her, “I’m sure it’s wrong to go on being good for too long, till one gets miserable. And I can see you’ve been good for years and years, because you look so unhappy”—Mrs. Arbuthnot opened her mouth to protest—“and I—I’ve done nothing but duties, things for other people, ever since I was a girl, and I don’t believe anybody loves me a bit—a bit—the b-better—and I long—oh, I long—for something else—something else—”

“Anyway,” said Mrs. Wilkins, stopping her, “I’m sure it’s wrong to keep being good for too long until you get miserable. And I can see you’ve been good for years because you look so unhappy”—Mrs. Arbuthnot opened her mouth to protest—“and I—I’ve just been doing my duties, things for other people, ever since I was a girl, and I don’t think anyone loves me at all—not at all—and I long—oh, I long—for something different—something else—”

Was she going to cry? Mrs. Arbuthnot became acutely uncomfortable and sympathetic. She hoped she wasn’t going to cry. Not there. Not in that unfriendly room, with strangers coming and going.

Was she going to cry? Mrs. Arbuthnot felt really uncomfortable and sympathetic. She hoped she wouldn’t cry. Not there. Not in that cold room, with strangers coming and going.

But Mrs. Wilkins, after tugging agitatedly at a handkerchief that wouldn’t come out of her pocket, did succeed at last in merely apparently blowing her nose with it, and then, blinking her eyes very quickly once or twice, looked at Mrs. Arbuthnot with a quivering air of half humble, half frightened apology, and smiled.

But Mrs. Wilkins, after anxiously tugging at a handkerchief that wouldn’t come out of her pocket, finally managed to pretend to blow her nose with it. Then, blinking rapidly once or twice, she looked at Mrs. Arbuthnot with a nervous mix of humility and fear, and smiled.

“Will you believe,” she whispered, trying to steady her mouth, evidently dreadfully ashamed of herself, “that I’ve never spoken to any one before in my life like this? I can’t think, I simply don’t know, what has come over me.”

“Will you believe,” she whispered, trying to calm herself, clearly very ashamed, “that I’ve never talked to anyone like this before in my life? I can’t think, I just don’t know what’s come over me.”

“It’s the advertisement,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, nodding gravely.

“It’s the ad,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, nodding seriously.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins, dabbing furtively at her eyes, “and us both being so—”—she blew her nose again a little—“miserable.”

“Yes,” said Mrs. Wilkins, wiping at her eyes discreetly, “and both of us being so—”—she blew her nose again a bit—“miserable.”

Chapter 2

Of course Mrs. Arbuthnot was not miserable—how could she be, she asked herself, when God was taking care of her?—but she let that pass for the moment unrepudiated, because of her conviction that here was another fellow-creature in urgent need of her help; and not just boots and blankets and better sanitary arrangements this time, but the more delicate help of comprehension, of finding the exact right words.

Of course Mrs. Arbuthnot wasn't unhappy—how could she be, she wondered, when God was looking out for her?—but she let that thought go for now because she felt that here was another person who needed her help urgently; and not just boots and blankets and better sanitation this time, but the more delicate help of understanding, of finding exactly the right words.

The exact right words, she presently discovered, after trying various ones about living for others, and prayer, and the peace to be found in placing oneself unreservedly in God’s hands—to meet all these words Mrs. Wilkins had other words, incoherent and yet, for the moment at least, till one had had more time, difficult to answer—the exact right words were a suggestion that it would do no harm to answer the advertisement. Non-committal. Mere inquiry. And what disturbed Mrs. Arbuthnot about this suggestion was that she did not make it solely to comfort Mrs. Wilkins; she made it because of her own strange longing for the mediaeval castle.

The exact right words, she soon realized, after trying various phrases about living for others, prayer, and the peace that comes from fully trusting God—were the suggestion that it wouldn’t hurt to respond to the ad. It was non-committal. Just a simple inquiry. What troubled Mrs. Arbuthnot about this idea was that she didn't propose it just to comfort Mrs. Wilkins; she suggested it because of her own strange desire for the medieval castle.

This was very disturbing. There she was, accustomed to direct, to lead, to advise, to support—except Frederick; she long since had learned to leave Frederick to God—being led herself, being influenced and thrown off her feet, by just an advertisement, by just an incoherent stranger. It was indeed disturbing. She failed to understand her sudden longing for what was, after all, self-indulgence, when for years no such desire had entered her heart.

This was really unsettling. There she was, used to being direct, leading, advising, and supporting—except when it came to Frederick; she had long since learned to leave him to God—now being led herself, influenced, and thrown off balance by just an ad, by just a random stranger. It was truly disturbing. She couldn't grasp her sudden craving for what was, after all, self-indulgence, when for years, she hadn’t felt such a desire at all.

“There’s no harm in simply asking,” she said in a low voice, as if the vicar and the Savings Bank and all her waiting and dependent poor were listening and condemning.

“There’s no harm in just asking,” she said quietly, as if the vicar, the Savings Bank, and all her needy and dependent poor were listening and judging.

“It isn’t as if it committed us to anything,” said Mrs. Wilkins, also in a low voice, but her voice shook.

“It’s not like it committed us to anything,” said Mrs. Wilkins, also in a low voice, but her voice trembled.

They got up simultaneously—Mrs. Arbuthnot had a sensation of surprise that Mrs. Wilkins should be so tall—and went to a writing-table, and Mrs. Arbuthnot wrote to Z, Box 1000, The Times, for particulars. She asked for all particulars, but the only one they really wanted was the one about the rent. They both felt that it was Mrs. Arbuthnot who ought to write the letter and do the business part. Not only was she used to organising and being practical, but she also was older, and certainly calmer; and she herself had no doubt too that she was wiser. Neither had Mrs. Wilkins any doubt of this; the very way Mrs. Arbuthnot parted her hair suggested a great calm that could only proceed from wisdom.

They stood up at the same time—Mrs. Arbuthnot was surprised that Mrs. Wilkins was so tall—and walked over to a writing desk, where Mrs. Arbuthnot wrote to Z, Box 1000, The Times, asking for details. She requested all the information, but the only thing they really cared about was the rent. They both felt that Mrs. Arbuthnot should write the letter and handle the business side of things. Not only was she used to organizing and being practical, but she was also older and definitely calmer; she was sure she was wiser too. Mrs. Wilkins had no doubt about this either; the way Mrs. Arbuthnot parted her hair suggested a calmness that could only come from wisdom.

But if she was wiser, older and calmer, Mrs. Arbuthnot’s new friend nevertheless seemed to her to be the one who impelled. Incoherent, she yet impelled. She appeared to have, apart from her need of help, an upsetting kind of character. She had a curious infectiousness. She led one on. And the way her unsteady mind leaped at conclusions—wrong ones, of course; witness the one that she, Mrs. Arbuthnot, was miserable—the way she leaped at conclusions was disconcerting.

But even though she was wiser, older, and calmer, Mrs. Arbuthnot’s new friend still seemed to be the one driving things forward. She was all over the place, yet she had a strong influence. Besides needing help, she had a strangely unsettling personality. There was something contagious about her. She drew people in. And the way her shaky thoughts made wild leaps to conclusions—wrong ones, obviously; for example, believing that Mrs. Arbuthnot was unhappy—the way she jumped to those conclusions was really unsettling.

Whatever she was, however, and whatever her unsteadiness, Mrs. Arbuthnot found herself sharing her excitement and her longing; and when the letter had been posted in the letter-box in the hall and actually was beyond getting back again, both she and Mrs. Wilkins felt the same sense of guilt.

Whatever she was, and despite her uncertainty, Mrs. Arbuthnot found herself caught up in her excitement and longing; and once the letter had been dropped in the mail slot in the hall and was truly out of reach, both she and Mrs. Wilkins experienced the same pang of guilt.

“It only shows,” said Mrs. Wilkins in a whisper, as they turned away from the letter-box, “how immaculately good we’ve been all our lives. The very first time we do anything our husbands don’t know about we feel guilty.”

“It just shows,” said Mrs. Wilkins in a whisper, as they turned away from the letterbox, “how perfectly good we’ve been all our lives. The very first time we do something our husbands don’t know about, we feel guilty.”

“I’m afraid I can’t say I’ve been immaculately good,” gently protested Mrs. Arbuthnot, a little uncomfortable at this fresh example of successful leaping at conclusions, for she had not said a word about her feeling of guilt.

“I’m afraid I can’t say I’ve been perfectly good,” Mrs. Arbuthnot gently protested, feeling a bit uneasy at this new example of jumping to conclusions, since she hadn’t mentioned anything about her feeling of guilt.

“Oh, but I’m sure you have—I see you being good—and that’s why you’re not happy.”

“Oh, but I’m sure you have—I see you being good—and that’s why you’re not happy.”

“She shouldn’t say things like that,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot. “I must try and help her not to.”

“She shouldn’t say things like that,” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot. “I have to try and help her not to.”

Aloud she said gravely, “I don’t know why you insist that I’m not happy. When you know me better I think you’ll find that I am. And I’m sure you don’t mean really that goodness, if one could attain it, makes one unhappy.”

Aloud she said seriously, “I don’t understand why you keep saying I’m not happy. When you know me better, I think you’ll see that I am. And I’m sure you don’t actually believe that goodness, if someone could achieve it, makes a person unhappy.”

“Yes, I do,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “Our sort of goodness does. We have attained it, and we are unhappy. There are miserable sorts of goodness and happy sorts—the sort we’ll have at the mediaeval castle, for instance, is the happy sort.”

“Yes, I do,” Mrs. Wilkins said. “Our kind of goodness does. We’ve achieved it, and we’re unhappy. There are miserable types of goodness and happy types—the kind we’ll have at the medieval castle, for example, is the happy kind.”

“That is, supposing we go there,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot restrainingly. She felt that Mrs. Wilkins needed holding on to. “After all, we’ve only written just to ask. Anybody may do that. I think it quite likely we shall find the conditions impossible, and even if they were not, probably by to-morrow we shall not want to go.”

“That is, if we actually go there,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said cautiously. She sensed that Mrs. Wilkins needed some support. “After all, we’ve only written to ask. Anyone can do that. I think it's pretty likely we’ll find the conditions unworkable, and even if they aren’t, probably by tomorrow we won’t want to go.”

“I see us there,” was Mrs. Wilkins’s answer to that.

“I see us there,” was Mrs. Wilkins’s response to that.

All this was very unbalancing. Mrs. Arbuthnot, as she presently splashed through the dripping streets on her way to a meeting she was to speak at, was in an unusually disturbed condition of mind. She had, she hoped, shown herself very calm to Mrs. Wilkins, very practical and sober, concealing her own excitement. But she was really extraordinarily moved, and she felt happy, and she felt guilty, and she felt afraid, and she had all the feelings, though this she did not know, of a woman who has come away from a secret meeting with her lover. That, indeed, was what she looked like when she arrived late on her platform; she, the open-browed, looked almost furtive as her eyes fell on the staring wooden faces waiting to hear her try and persuade them to contribute to the alleviation of the urgent needs of the Hampstead poor, each one convinced that they needed contributions themselves. She looked as though she were hiding something discreditable but delightful. Certainly her customary clear expression of candour was not there, and its place was taken by a kind of suppressed and frightened pleasedness, which would have led a more worldly-minded audience to the instant conviction of recent and probably impassioned lovemaking.

All of this was really unsettling. As Mrs. Arbuthnot splashed through the wet streets on her way to a meeting where she was supposed to speak, she felt unusually agitated. She hoped she had appeared very calm to Mrs. Wilkins—very practical and serious—hiding her own excitement. But inside, she was incredibly emotional; she felt happy, guilty, scared, and experienced all the feelings, although she didn't realize it, of a woman who had just left a secret meeting with her lover. That’s exactly how she looked when she arrived late to her speaking spot; she, with her open brow, seemed almost sneaky as her eyes landed on the blank, wooden faces waiting for her to persuade them to contribute to the pressing needs of the Hampstead poor, each one convinced they needed contributions themselves. She looked like she was concealing something shameful yet delightful. Her usual clear look of honesty was absent, replaced by a kind of restrained and nervous pleasure that would have led a more sophisticated audience to instantly suspect recent and possibly passionate romance.

Beauty, beauty, beauty . . . the words kept ringing in her ears as she stood on the platform talking of sad things to the sparsely attended meeting. She had never been to Italy. Was that really what her nest-egg was to be spent on after all? Though she couldn’t approve of the way Mrs. Wilkins was introducing the idea of predestination into her immediate future, just as if she had no choice, just as if to struggle, or even to reflect, were useless, it yet influenced her. Mrs. Wilkins’s eyes had been the eyes of a seer. Some people were like that, Mrs. Arbuthnot knew; and if Mrs. Wilkins had actually seen her at the mediaeval castle it did seem probable that struggling would be a waste of time. Still, to spend her nest-egg on self-indulgence— The origin of this egg had been corrupt, but she had at least supposed its end was to be creditable. Was she to deflect it from its intended destination, which alone had appeared to justify her keeping it, and spend it on giving herself pleasure?

Beauty, beauty, beauty... the words echoed in her mind as she stood on the platform discussing sad topics to a small crowd. She had never been to Italy. Was that really what her savings were meant for after all? Although she couldn't agree with how Mrs. Wilkins was bringing the idea of fate into her immediate future, as if she had no choice, as if it was pointless to struggle or even think, it still affected her. Mrs. Wilkins's eyes had been like those of a visionary. Some people were like that, Mrs. Arbuthnot knew; and if Mrs. Wilkins had truly seen her at the medieval castle, it did seem likely that fighting against it would be pointless. Still, spending her savings on self-indulgence—The source of this money had been questionable, but she had at least thought its purpose would be honorable. Was she really going to divert it from its intended use, which had seemed to justify her keeping it, and spend it on her own pleasure?

Mrs. Arbuthnot spoke on and on, so much practised in the kind of speech that she could have said it all in her sleep, and at the end of the meeting, her eyes dazzled by her secret visions, she hardly noticed that nobody was moved in any way whatever, least of all in the way of contributions.

Mrs. Arbuthnot kept talking and talking, so skilled in her speech that she could have recited it in her sleep. By the end of the meeting, with her eyes sparkling from her hidden thoughts, she barely realized that no one was affected at all, especially when it came to making contributions.

But the vicar noticed. The vicar was disappointed. Usually his good friend and supporter Mrs. Arbuthnot succeeded better than this. And, what was even more unusual, she appeared, he observed, not even to mind.

But the vicar noticed. The vicar was disappointed. Usually, his good friend and supporter Mrs. Arbuthnot did better than this. And what was even more unusual, he observed, was that she didn’t seem to care at all.

“I can’t imagine,” he said to her as they parted, speaking irritably, for he was irritated both by the audience and by her, “what these people are coming to. Nothing seems to move them.”

“I can’t imagine,” he said to her as they parted, speaking irritably, because he was annoyed both by the audience and by her, “what these people are turning into. Nothing seems to affect them.”

“Perhaps they need a holiday,” suggested Mrs. Arbuthnot; an unsatisfactory, a queer reply, the vicar thought.

“Maybe they need a vacation,” suggested Mrs. Arbuthnot; an unsatisfactory, odd reply, the vicar thought.

“In February?” he called after her sarcastically.

“In February?” he called after her, sarcastic.

“Oh no—not till April,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot over her shoulder.

“Oh no—not until April,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said over her shoulder.

“Very odd,” thought the vicar. “Very odd indeed.” And he went home and was not perhaps quite christian to his wife.

“Very strange,” thought the vicar. “Very strange indeed.” And he went home and wasn’t exactly kind to his wife.

That night in her prayers Mrs. Arbuthnot asked for guidance. She felt she ought really to ask, straight out and roundly, that the mediaeval castle should already have been taken by some one else and the whole thing thus be settled, but her courage failed her. Suppose her prayer were to be answered? No; she couldn’t ask it; she couldn’t risk it. And after all—she almost pointed this out to God—if she spent her present nest-egg on a holiday she could quite soon accumulate another. Frederick pressed money on her; and it would only mean, while she rolled up a second egg, that for a time her contributions to the parish charities would be less. And then it could be the next nest-egg whose original corruption would be purged away by the use to which it was finally put.

That night in her prayers, Mrs. Arbuthnot asked for guidance. She felt she should really ask, outright and bluntly, that the medieval castle should already have been taken by someone else and that everything would be settled, but her courage failed her. What if her prayer was actually answered? No; she couldn’t ask for that; she couldn’t take the risk. And after all—she almost pointed this out to God—if she spent her current savings on a vacation, she could easily save up again. Frederick was offering her money, and it would only mean that while she saved up a second nest egg, her donations to the parish charities would be less for a while. Plus, it could be the next nest egg whose original purpose would be redeemed by how it was ultimately used.

For Mrs. Arbuthnot, who had no money of her own, was obliged to live on the proceeds of Frederick’s activities, and her very nest-egg was the fruit, posthumously ripened, of ancient sin. The way Frederick made his living was one of the standing distresses of her life. He wrote immensely popular memoirs, regularly, every year, of the mistresses of kings. There were in history numerous kings who had had mistresses, and there were still more numerous mistresses who had had kings; so that he had been able to publish a book of memoirs during each year of his married life, and even so there were great further piles of these ladies waiting to be dealt with. Mrs. Arbuthnot was helpless. Whether she liked it or not, she was obliged to live on the proceeds. He gave her a dreadful sofa once, after the success of his Du Barri memoir, with swollen cushions and soft, receptive lap, and it seemed to her a miserable thing that there, in her very home, should flaunt this re-incarnation of a dead old French sinner.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, who had no money of her own, had to rely on the income from Frederick’s work, and her little savings were the result, posthumously earned, of past wrongdoings. The way Frederick made his living was a constant source of distress for her. Every year, he wrote hugely popular memoirs about the mistresses of kings. Throughout history, there were many kings with mistresses, and even more mistresses who had kings; this allowed him to release a memoir each year of their marriage, and there were still plenty of other women waiting to be featured. Mrs. Arbuthnot felt powerless. Whether she liked it or not, she had to live off the proceeds. After the success of his Du Barri memoir, he once gifted her an awful sofa with puffy cushions and a soft, inviting seat, and it struck her as a terrible thing that this re-incarnation of a long-dead French sinner should be so proudly displayed in her home.

Simply good, convinced that morality is the basis of happiness, the fact that she and Frederick should draw their sustenance from guilt, however much purged by the passage of centuries, was one of the secret reasons of her sadness. The more the memoired lady had forgotten herself, the more his book about her was read and the more free-handed he was to his wife; and all that he gave her was spent, after adding slightly to her nest-egg—for she did hope and believe that some day people would cease to want to read of wickedness, and then Frederick would need supporting—on helping the poor. The parish flourished because, to take a handful at random, of the ill-behaviour of the ladies Du Barri, Montespan, Pompadour, Ninon de l’Enclos, and even of learned Maintenon. The poor were the filter through which the money was passed, to come out, Mrs. Arbuthnot hoped, purified. She could do no more. She had tried in days gone by to think the situation out, to discover the exact right course for her to take, but had found it, as she had found Frederick, too difficult, and had left it, as she had left Frederick, to God. Nothing of this money was spent on her house or dress; those remained, except for the great soft sofa, austere. It was the poor who profited. Their very boots were stout with sins. But how difficult it had been. Mrs. Arbuthnot, groping for guidance, prayed about it to exhaustion. Ought she perhaps to refuse to touch the money, to avoid it as she would have avoided the sins which were its source? But then what about the parish’s boots? She asked the vicar what he thought, and, through much delicate language, evasive and cautious, it did finally appear that he was for the boots.

Simply good, convinced that morality is the foundation of happiness, the fact that she and Frederick drew their support from guilt, no matter how much it had been washed clean over the centuries, was one of the hidden reasons for her sadness. The more the remembered lady faded from memory, the more his book about her was read, and the more generous he became to his wife; and all that he gave her was spent, after adding a little to her savings—because she hoped and believed that someday people would stop wanting to read about wickedness, and then Frederick would need support—on helping the poor. The parish thrived because, to take just a few examples, of the misdeeds of ladies like Du Barri, Montespan, Pompadour, Ninon de l’Enclos, and even the learned Maintenon. The poor were the filter through which the money passed, emerging, Mrs. Arbuthnot hoped, purified. She could do no more. In times past, she had tried to think the situation through, to find the exact right path for her to take, but she found it, like she found Frederick, too difficult, and left it, as she had left Frederick, to God. None of this money was spent on her home or clothes; those remained, except for the large, soft sofa, quite plain. It was the poor who benefitted. Their very boots were weighed down with sins. But it had been so difficult. Mrs. Arbuthnot, searching for guidance, prayed about it until she was exhausted. Should she perhaps refuse to touch the money, avoiding it as she would have avoided the sins that were its origin? But what about the parish’s boots? She asked the vicar what he thought, and after much careful and evasive language, it became clear that he supported the boots.

At least she had persuaded Frederick, when first he began his terrible successful career—he only began it after their marriage; when she married him he had been a blameless official attached to the library of the British Museum—to publish the memoirs under another name, so that she was not publicly branded. Hampstead read the books with glee, and had no idea that their writer lived in its midst. Frederick was almost unknown, even by sight, in Hampstead. He never went to any of its gatherings. Whatever it was he did in the way of recreation was done in London, but he never spoke of what he did or whom he saw; he might have been perfectly friendless for any mention he ever made of friends to his wife. Only the vicar knew where the money for the parish came from, and he regarded it, he told Mrs. Arbuthnot, as a matter of honour not to mention it.

At least she had convinced Frederick, when he first started his surprisingly successful career—he only started it after they got married; when she married him, he was a respectable official at the British Museum library—to publish the memoirs under a different name, so she wouldn't be publicly associated with them. Hampstead devoured the books with delight, completely unaware that the author lived among them. Frederick was nearly anonymous, even by sight, in Hampstead. He never attended any local events. Whatever leisure activities he engaged in were done in London, but he never talked about what he did or who he met; he might as well have been entirely friendless for all the mention he made of friends to his wife. Only the vicar knew where the parish funds came from, and he considered it, he told Mrs. Arbuthnot, a matter of honor not to bring it up.

And at least her little house was not haunted by the loose-lived ladies, for Frederick did his work away from home. He had two rooms near the British Museum, which was the scene of his exhumations, and there he went every morning, and he came back long after his wife was asleep. Sometimes he did not come back at all. Sometimes she did not see him for several days together. Then he would suddenly appear at breakfast, having let himself in with his latchkey the night before, very jovial and good-natured and free-handed and glad if she would allow him to give her something—a well-fed man, contented with the world; a jolly, full-blooded, satisfied man. And she was always gentle, and anxious that his coffee should be as he liked it.

And at least her little house wasn't haunted by the wild women, because Frederick worked away from home. He had two rooms near the British Museum, where he did his excavations, and he went there every morning, returning long after his wife was asleep. Sometimes he didn’t come back at all. There were times when she wouldn’t see him for several days in a row. Then he would suddenly show up at breakfast, having let himself in with his key the night before, looking cheerful and easy-going, ready to give her something—a well-fed man, happy with life; a jolly, robust, content man. And she was always kind and eager to make his coffee just the way he liked it.

He seemed very happy. Life, she often thought, however much one tabulated was yet a mystery. There were always some people it was impossible to place. Frederick was one of them. He didn’t seem to bear the remotest resemblance to the original Frederick. He didn’t seem to have the least need of any of the things he used to say were so important and beautiful—love, home, complete communion of thoughts, complete immersion in each other’s interests. After those early painful attempts to hold him up to the point from which they had hand in hand so splendidly started, attempts in which she herself had got terribly hurt and the Frederick she supposed she had married was mangled out of recognition, she hung him up finally by her bedside as the chief subject of her prayers, and left him, except for those, entirely to God. She had loved Frederick too deeply to be able now to do anything but pray for him. He had no idea that he never went out of the house without her blessing going with him too, hovering, like a little echo of finished love, round that once dear head. She didn’t dare think of him as he used to be, as he had seemed to her to be in those marvellous first days of their love-making, of their marriage. Her child had died; she had nothing, nobody of her own to lavish herself on. The poor became her children, and God the object of her love. What could be happier than such a life, she sometimes asked herself; but her face, and particularly her eyes, continued sad.

He seemed really happy. Life, she often thought, no matter how much you try to understand it, was still a mystery. There were always some people who were impossible to figure out. Frederick was one of them. He didn’t seem to bear any resemblance to the original Frederick. He didn’t appear to need any of the things he used to claim were so important and beautiful—love, home, a deep connection of thoughts, or being fully invested in each other’s interests. After those early painful attempts to bring him back to the point from which they had so beautifully started hand in hand, attempts that left her deeply hurt and made the Frederick she thought she had married unrecognizable, she finally made him the main subject of her prayers by her bedside and left him, except for those prayers, entirely to God. She loved Frederick too much to do anything but pray for him now. He had no idea that he never left the house without her blessing going with him, lingering like a faint echo of lost love around that once cherished head. She didn’t dare think of him as he used to be, as he had seemed to her during those incredible early days of their romance and marriage. Her child had died; she had nothing, no one of her own to give her love to. The poor became her children, and God the focus of her love. What could be happier than such a life, she sometimes wondered; but her face, especially her eyes, remained sad.

“Perhaps when we’re old . . . perhaps when we are both quite old . . .” she would think wistfully.

“Maybe when we’re old... maybe when we’re both really old...” she would think with a sense of longing.

Chapter 3

The owner of the mediaeval castle was an Englishman, a Mr. Briggs, who was in London at the moment and wrote that it had beds enough for eight people, exclusive of servants, three sitting-rooms, battlements, dungeons, and electric light. The rent was £60 for the month, the servants’ wages were extra, and he wanted references—he wanted assurances that the second half of his rent would be paid, the first half being paid in advance, and he wanted assurances of respectability from a solicitor, or a doctor, or a clergyman. He was very polite in his letter, explaining that his desire for references was what was usual and should be regarded as a mere formality.

The owner of the medieval castle was an Englishman named Mr. Briggs, who was in London at the time. He wrote that the castle had enough beds for eight people, not counting the servants, three living rooms, battlements, dungeons, and electric lighting. The rent was £60 for the month, with additional costs for the servants’ wages. He wanted references—assurances that the second half of the rent would be paid, with the first half due in advance, and he required proof of respectability from a solicitor, doctor, or clergyman. He was very polite in his letter, explaining that his request for references was standard and should be seen as just a formality.

Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins had not thought of references, and they had not dreamed a rent could be so high. In their minds had floated sums like three guineas a week; or less, seeing that the place was small and old.

Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins hadn’t considered references, and they never imagined the rent could be so high. They had been thinking of amounts like three guineas a week, or even less, since the place was small and old.

Sixty pounds for a single month.

Sixty pounds for just one month.

It staggered them.

It blew their minds.

Before Mrs. Arbuthnot’s eyes rose up boots: endless vistas, all the stout boots that sixty pounds would buy; and besides the rent there would be the servants’ wagesc, and the food, and the railway journeys out and home. While as for references, these did indeed seem a stumbling-block; it did seem impossible to give any without making their plan more public than they had intended.

Before Mrs. Arbuthnot's eyes appeared boots: endless options, all the sturdy boots that sixty pounds could buy; and on top of rent, there would be the servants’ wages, food, and train fares to and from home. As for references, they definitely seemed like a hurdle; it felt impossible to provide any without making their plan more public than they wanted.

They had both—even Mrs. Arbuthnot, lured for once away from perfect candour by the realisation of the great saving of trouble and criticism an imperfect explanation would produce—they had both thought it would be a good plan to give out, each to her own circle, their circles being luckily distinct, that each was going to stay with a friend who had a house in Italy. It would be true as far as it went—Mrs. Wilkins asserted that it would be quite true, but Mrs. Arbuthnot thought it wouldn’t be quite—and it was the only way, Mrs. Wilkins said, to keep Mellersh even approximately quiet. To spend any of her money just on the mere getting to Italy would cause him indignation; what he would say if he knew she was renting part of a mediaeval castle on her own account Mrs. Wilkins preferred not to think. It would take him days to say it all; and this although it was her very own money, and not a penny of it had ever been his.

They both—even Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was usually completely honest—were tempted to avoid the hassle and criticism that a less than perfect explanation would cause. They decided it would be a good idea to let their separate friend groups know that each of them was going to stay with a friend who had a house in Italy. It would be true enough—Mrs. Wilkins insisted it was totally true, but Mrs. Arbuthnot had her doubts—and it was the only way, according to Mrs. Wilkins, to keep Mellersh somewhat calm. Spending any of her money just to get to Italy would infuriate him; she didn’t even want to think about what he would say if he found out she was renting part of a medieval castle on her own. It would take him days to express all that, and this was despite the fact that it was her own money—none of it had ever been his.

“But I expect,” she said, “your husband is just the same. I expect all husbands are alike in the long run.”

“But I think,” she said, “your husband is probably the same. I think all husbands are pretty much alike in the end.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot said nothing, because her reason for not wanting Frederick to know was the exactly opposite one—Frederick would be only too pleased for her to go, he would not mind it in the very least; indeed, he would hail such a manifestation of self-indulgence and worldliness with an amusement that would hurt, and urge her to have a good time and not to hurry home with a crushing detachment. Far better, she thought, to be missed by Mellersh than to be sped by Frederick. To be missed, to be needed, from whatever motive, was, she thought, better than the complete loneliness of not being missed or needed at all.

Mrs. Arbuthnot said nothing because her reason for not wanting Frederick to know was the complete opposite—Frederick would be more than happy for her to go; he wouldn’t mind it at all. In fact, he would greet such a show of self-indulgence and worldliness with an amusement that would sting and encourage her to have fun and not rush back home with a cold indifference. She thought it was far better to be missed by Mellersh than to be pushed along by Frederick. To be missed, to be needed, no matter the reason, was, in her eyes, better than the utter loneliness of not being missed or needed at all.

She therefore said nothing, and allowed Mrs. Wilkins to leap at her conclusions unchecked. But they did, both of them, for a whole day feel that the only thing to be done was to renounce the mediaeval castle; and it was in arriving at this bitter decision that they really realised how acute had been their longing for it.

She said nothing and let Mrs. Wilkins jump to her own conclusions without interruption. But for an entire day, they both felt that the only thing to do was give up on the medieval castle; it was through reaching this painful decision that they truly understood how deep their desire for it had been.

Then Mrs. Arbuthnot, whose mind was trained in the finding of ways out of difficulties, found a way out of the reference difficulty; and simultaneously Mrs. Wilkins had a vision revealing to her how to reduce the rent.

Then Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was skilled at finding solutions to problems, figured out how to address the reference issue; at the same time, Mrs. Wilkins had a realization about how to lower the rent.

Mrs. Arbuthnot’s plan was simple, and completely successful. She took the whole of the rent in person to the owner, drawing it out of her Savings Bank—again she looked furtive and apologetic, as if the clerk must know the money was wanted for purposes of self-indulgence—and, going up with the six ten pound notes in her hand-bag to the address near the Brompton Oratory where the owner lived, presented them to him, waiving her right to pay only half. And when he saw her, and her parted hair and soft dark eyes and sober apparel, and heard her grave voice, he told her not to bother about writing round for those references.

Mrs. Arbuthnot’s plan was simple and completely successful. She personally took the entire rent to the owner, withdrawing it from her Savings Bank—once again, she seemed nervous and apologetic, as if the clerk must know the money was meant for something indulgent—and, carrying the six ten-pound notes in her handbag to the address near the Brompton Oratory where the owner lived, she presented them to him, giving up her right to pay only half. And when he saw her, with her neatly parted hair, soft dark eyes, and modest clothes, and heard her serious voice, he told her not to worry about gathering those references.

“It’ll be all right,” he said, scribbling a receipt for the rent. “Do sit down, won’t you? Nasty day, isn’t it? You’ll find the old castle has lots of sunshine, whatever else it hasn’t got. Husband going?”

“It’ll be fine,” he said, quickly writing up a receipt for the rent. “Please, have a seat, would you? Really awful weather, isn’t it? You’ll see that the old castle gets plenty of sunshine, no matter what else it’s missing. Your husband leaving?”

Mrs. Arbuthnot, unused to anything but candour, looked troubled at this question and began to murmur inarticulately, and the owner at once concluded that she was a widow—a war one, of course, for other widows were old—and that he had been a fool not to guess it.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, not used to anything but honesty, looked uneasy at this question and started to mumble incoherently, and the owner immediately assumed that she was a widow—a war widow, of course, since other widows were older—and that he had been foolish not to figure it out.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he said, turning red right up to his fair hair. “I didn’t mean—h’m, h’m, h’m—”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he said, blushing all the way to his light hair. “I didn’t mean—umm, umm, umm—”

He ran his eye over the receipt he had written. “Yes, I think that’s all right,” he said, getting up and giving it to her. “Now,” he added, taking the six notes she held out and smiling, for Mrs. Arbuthnot was agreeable to look at, “I’m richer, and you’re happier. I’ve got money, and you’ve got San Salvatore. I wonder which is best.”

He looked over the receipt he had written. “Yeah, I think that looks good,” he said, getting up and handing it to her. “Now,” he added, taking the six bills she offered with a smile, because Mrs. Arbuthnot was nice to look at, “I’m richer, and you’re happier. I’ve got the money, and you’ve got San Salvatore. I wonder which is better.”

“I think you know,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot with her sweet smile.

“I think you know,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said with her sweet smile.

He laughed and opened the door for her. It was a pity the interview was over. He would have liked to ask her to lunch with him. She made him think of his mother, of his nurse, of all things kind and comforting, besides having the attraction of not being his mother or his nurse.

He laughed and opened the door for her. It was a shame the interview was over. He would have liked to ask her to lunch with him. She reminded him of his mom, his nurse, and all things kind and comforting, but also had the appeal of not being his mom or his nurse.

“I hope you’ll like the old place,” he said, holding her hand a minute at the door. The very feel of her hand, even through its glove, was reassuring; it was the sort of hand, he thought, that children would like to hold in the dark. “In April, you know, it’s simply a mass of flowers. And then there’s the sea. You must wear white. You’ll fit in very well. There are several portraits of you there.”

“I hope you’ll like the old place,” he said, holding her hand for a moment at the door. The feel of her hand, even through the glove, was comforting; it was the kind of hand, he thought, that kids would want to hold in the dark. “In April, it’s just a sea of flowers. And then there’s the ocean. You have to wear white. You’ll blend in perfectly. There are several portraits of you there.”

“Portraits?”

“Photos?”

“Madonnas, you know. There’s one on the stairs really exactly like you.”

“Madonnas, you know. There’s one on the stairs that looks just like you.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot smiled and said good-bye and thanked him. Without the least trouble and at once she had got him placed in his proper category: he was an artist and of an effervescent temperament.

Mrs. Arbuthnot smiled, said goodbye, and thanked him. Without any effort, she immediately put him in his proper category: he was an artist with a bubbly personality.

She shook hands and left, and he wished she hadn’t. After she was gone he supposed that he ought to have asked for those references, if only because she would think him so unbusiness-like not to, but he could as soon have insisted on references from a saint in a nimbus as from that grave, sweet lady.

She shook his hand and left, and he wished she hadn’t. Once she was gone, he thought he should have asked for those references, mainly because she would find him so unprofessional if he didn’t. But he could no more have insisted on references from a saint in a halo than he could from that serious, kind woman.

Rose Arbuthnot.

Rose Arbuthnot.

Her letter, making the appointment, lay on the table.

Her letter, which confirmed the appointment, was on the table.

Pretty name.

Nice name.

That difficulty, then, was overcome. But there still remained the other one, the really annihilating effect of the expense on the nest-eggs, and especially on Mrs. Wilkins’s, which was in size, compared with Mrs. Arbuthnot’s, as the egg of the plover to that of the duck; and this in its turn was overcome by the vision vouchsafed to Mrs. Wilkins, revealing to her the steps to be taken for its overcoming. Having got San Salvatore—the beautiful, the religious name, fascinated them—they in their turn would advertise in the Agony Column of The Times, and would inquire after two more ladies, of similar desires to their own, to join them and share the expenses.

That challenge was tackled. However, there was still the other issue—the significant impact of the costs on their savings, especially on Mrs. Wilkins’s, which was much smaller compared to Mrs. Arbuthnot’s, like a plover’s egg next to a duck’s. This was eventually resolved by a vision granted to Mrs. Wilkins, showing her how to address it. Once they secured San Salvatore—the beautiful, sacred name that captivated them—they would place an ad in the Agony Column of The Times to look for two more ladies with similar interests to join them and share the expenses.

At once the strain of the nest-eggs would be reduced from half to a quarter. Mrs. Wilkins was prepared to fling her entire egg into the adventure, but she realised that if it were to cost even sixpence over her ninety pounds her position would be terrible. Imagine going to Mellersh and saying, “I owe.” It would be awful enough if some day circumstances forced her to say, “I have no nest-egg,” but at least she would be supported in such a case by the knowledge that the egg had been her own. She therefore, though prepared to fling her last penny into the adventure, was not prepared to fling into it a single farthing that was not demonstrably her own; and she felt that if her share of the rent was reduced to fifteen pounds only, she would have a safe margin for the other expenses. Also they might economise very much on food—gather olives off their own trees and eat them, for instance, and perhaps catch fish.

Immediately, the burden of the savings would drop from half to a quarter. Mrs. Wilkins was ready to put all her savings into the adventure, but she realized that if it cost even sixpence more than her ninety pounds, her situation would be dire. Just imagine going to Mellersh and saying, “I owe.” It would be bad enough if one day she had to say, “I have no savings,” but at least she’d have the comfort of knowing that the savings had come from her own efforts. So, while she was willing to throw in her last penny for the adventure, she wasn’t willing to invest even a single farthing that wasn’t clearly hers; she believed that if her share of the rent was reduced to fifteen pounds, she’d have a safe cushion for other expenses. Plus, they could save a lot on food—like picking olives from their own trees to eat, and maybe even catching fish.

Of course, as they pointed out to each other, they could reduce the rent to an almost negligible sum by increasing the number of sharers; they could have six more ladies instead of two if they wanted to, seeing that there were eight beds. But supposing the eight beds were distributed in couples in four rooms, it would not be altogether what they wanted, to find themselves shut up at night with a stranger. Besides, they thought that perhaps having so many would not be quite so peaceful. After all, they were going to San Salvatore for peace and rest and joy, and six more ladies, especially if they got into one’s bedroom, might a little interfere with that.

Of course, as they mentioned to each other, they could significantly cut down the rent by bringing in more roommates; they could have six more women instead of just two if they wanted to, considering there were eight beds. But if those eight beds were divided into pairs in four rooms, it wouldn't really be what they wanted to end up sharing a room at night with a stranger. Plus, they figured that having so many people around might not be very peaceful. After all, they were going to San Salvatore for tranquility, relaxation, and happiness, and having six more ladies, especially if they ended up in one’s bedroom, could definitely interfere with that.

However, there seemed to be only two ladies in England at that moment who had any wish to join them, for they had only two answers to their advertisement.

However, it seemed that at that moment there were only two women in England who wanted to join them since they received only two responses to their ad.

“Well, we only want two,” said Mrs. Wilkins, quickly recovering, for she had imagined a great rush.

“Well, we only want two,” Mrs. Wilkins said, quickly recovering, as she had envisioned a big rush.

“I think a choice would have been a good thing,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“I think having a choice would have been a good thing,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“You mean because then we needn’t have had Lady Caroline Dester.”

“You mean because then we wouldn’t have needed Lady Caroline Dester.”

“I didn’t say that,” gently protested Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“I didn’t say that,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said softly.

“We needn’t have her,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “Just one more person would help us a great deal with the rent. We’re not obliged to have two.”

"We don't need her," Mrs. Wilkins said. "Just one more person would really help us with the rent. We’re not required to have two."

“But why should we not have her? She seems really quite what we want.”

“But why shouldn't we have her? She seems exactly what we need.”

“Yes—she does from her letter,” said Mrs. Wilkins doubtfully.

“Yeah—she does from her letter,” Mrs. Wilkins said uncertainly.

She felt she would be terribly shy of Lady Caroline. Incredible as it may seem, seeing how they get into everything, Mrs. Wilkins had never come across any members of the aristocracy.

She felt she would be really shy around Lady Caroline. As unbelievable as it sounds, considering how often they stick their noses into everything, Mrs. Wilkins had never met any members of the aristocracy.

They interviewed Lady Caroline, and they interviewed the other applicant, a Mrs. Fisher.

They interviewed Lady Caroline and also interviewed the other candidate, Mrs. Fisher.

Lady Caroline came to the club in Shaftesbury Avenue, and appeared to be wholly taken up by one great longing, a longing to get away from everybody she had ever known. When she saw the club, and Mrs. Arbuthnot, and Mrs. Wilkins, she was sure that here was exactly what she wanted. She would be in Italy—a place she adored; she would not be in hotels—places she loathed; she would not be staying with friends—persons she disliked; and she would be in the company of strangers who would never mention a single person she knew, for the simple reason that they had not, could not have, and would not come across them. She asked a few questions about the fourth woman, and was satisfied with the answers. Mrs. Fisher, of Prince of Wales Terrace. A widow. She too would be unacquainted with any of her friends. Lady Caroline did not even know where Prince of Wales Terrace was.

Lady Caroline arrived at the club on Shaftesbury Avenue, clearly consumed by a strong desire: the need to escape from everyone she had ever known. As she looked around the club, at Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins, she felt certain that this was exactly what she wanted. She would be in Italy—a place she loved; she wouldn’t be staying in hotels—places she hated; she wouldn’t be with friends—people she couldn’t stand; and she would be surrounded by strangers who wouldn’t mention a single person she knew, simply because they hadn’t, couldn’t, and wouldn’t have encountered them. She asked a few questions about the fourth woman and was satisfied with the responses. Mrs. Fisher, from Prince of Wales Terrace. A widow. She too would be unfamiliar with any of Lady Caroline's friends. Lady Caroline didn’t even know where Prince of Wales Terrace was.

“It’s in London,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“It’s in London,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said.

“Is it?” said Lady Caroline.

“Is it?” asked Lady Caroline.

It all seemed most restful.

It all felt really relaxing.

Mrs. Fisher was unable to come to the club because, she explained by letter, she could not walk without a stick; therefore Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins went to her.

Mrs. Fisher couldn't come to the club because, as she explained in a letter, she couldn't walk without a cane; so Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins went to see her.

“But if she can’t come to the club how can she go to Italy?” wondered Mrs. Wilkins, aloud.

“But if she can’t make it to the club, how is she supposed to go to Italy?” Mrs. Wilkins wondered aloud.

“We shall hear that from her own lips,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

"We'll hear that straight from her," said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

From Mrs. Fisher’s lips they merely heard, in reply to delicate questioning, that sitting in trains was not walking about; and they knew that already. Except for the stick, however, she appeared to be a most desirable fourth—quiet, educated, elderly. She was much older than they or Lady Caroline—Lady Caroline had informed them she was twenty-eight—but not so old as to have ceased to be active-minded. She was very respectable indeed, and still wore a complete suit of black though her husband had died, she told them, eleven years before. Her house was full of signed photographs of illustrious Victorian dead, all of whom she said she had known when she was little. Her father had been an eminent critic, and in his house she had seen practically everybody who was anybody in letters and art. Carlyle had scowled at her; Matthew Arnold had held her on his knee; Tennyson had sonorously rallied her on the length of her pig-tail. She animatedly showed them the photographs, hung everywhere on her walls, pointing out the signatures with her stick, and she neither gave any information about her own husband nor asked for any about the husbands of her visitors; which was the greatest comfort. Indeed, she seemed to think that they also were widows, for on inquiring who the fourth lady was to be, and being told it was a Lady Caroline Dester, she said, “Is she a widow too?” And on their explaining that she was not, because she had not yet been married, observed with abstracted amiability, “All in good time.”

From Mrs. Fisher’s lips, they only heard, in response to gentle questioning, that sitting on trains wasn't the same as walking around; and they already knew that. Aside from her cane, she seemed like a great addition to their group—calm, educated, and mature. She was much older than they were or Lady Caroline—Lady Caroline had told them she was twenty-eight—but not too old to be sharp-minded. She was quite respectable and still wore a full black outfit even though her husband had passed away, she mentioned, eleven years ago. Her house was filled with signed photographs of famous Victorian figures, all of whom she claimed to have known when she was young. Her father had been a well-known critic, and in his home, she had met just about everyone who was anyone in literature and art. Carlyle had frowned at her; Matthew Arnold had sat her on his knee; Tennyson had jokingly teased her about her long pig-tail. She excitedly showed them the photos, which covered her walls, pointing out the signatures with her cane, and she neither shared any details about her own husband nor asked about the husbands of her guests; which was a huge relief. In fact, she seemed to assume they were also widows because when she asked who the fourth lady would be, and they told her it was Lady Caroline Dester, she inquired, “Is she a widow too?” And when they explained that she wasn’t, since she hadn’t been married yet, she remarked with distant friendliness, “All in good time.”

But Mrs. Fisher’s very abstractedness—and she seemed to be absorbed chiefly in the interesting people she used to know and in their memorial photographs, and quite a good part of the interview was taken up by reminiscent anecdote of Carlyle, Meredith, Matthew Arnold, Tennyson, and a host of others—her very abstractedness was a recommendation. She only asked, she said, to be allowed to sit quiet in the sun and remember. That was all Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins asked of their sharers. It was their idea of a perfect sharer that she should sit quiet in the sun and remember, rousing herself on Saturday evenings sufficiently to pay her share. Mrs. Fisher was very fond, too, she said, of flowers, and once when she was spending a week-end with her father at Box Hill—

But Mrs. Fisher’s tendency to zone out—and she seemed mostly caught up in the interesting people she used to know and their photos, and quite a bit of the conversation was filled with nostalgic stories about Carlyle, Meredith, Matthew Arnold, Tennyson, and many others—her very tendency to zone out was actually a plus. She only requested, she said, to be allowed to sit quietly in the sun and reminisce. That was all Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins wanted from their companions. Their idea of an ideal companion was someone who would sit quietly in the sun and remember, just waking up on Saturday evenings long enough to contribute her share. Mrs. Fisher also mentioned that she loved flowers, and once when she spent a weekend with her father at Box Hill—

“Who lived at Box Hill?” interrupted Mrs. Wilkins, who hung on Mrs. Fisher’s reminiscences, intensely excited by meeting somebody who had actually been familiar with all the really and truly and undoubtedly great—actually seen them, heard them talking, touched them.

“Who lived at Box Hill?” interrupted Mrs. Wilkins, who was captivated by Mrs. Fisher’s stories, genuinely thrilled to meet someone who had actually been close to all the truly amazing people—had really seen them, heard them speak, touched them.

Mrs. Fisher looked at her over the top of her glasses in some surprise. Mrs. Wilkins, in her eagerness to tear the heart out quickly of Mrs. Fisher’s reminiscences, afraid that at any moment Mrs. Arbuthnot would take her away and she wouldn’t have heard half, had already interrupted several times with questions which appeared ignorant to Mrs. Fisher.

Mrs. Fisher glanced at her over the top of her glasses in surprise. Mrs. Wilkins, eager to quickly get to the heart of Mrs. Fisher’s memories, worried that any moment Mrs. Arbuthnot would take her away and she wouldn’t have heard half of it, had already interrupted several times with questions that seemed clueless to Mrs. Fisher.

“Meredith of course,” said Mrs. Fisher rather shortly. “I remember a particular week-end”—she continued. “My father often took me, but I always remember this week-end particularly—”

“Meredith, of course,” Mrs. Fisher said somewhat abruptly. “I remember one specific weekend”—she continued. “My father often took me, but this weekend always stands out in my mind—”

“Did you know Keats?” eagerly interrupted Mrs. Wilkins.

“Did you know Keats?” Mrs. Wilkins eagerly interrupted.

Mrs. Fisher, after a pause, said with sub-acid reserve that she had been unacquainted with both Keats and Shakespeare.

Mrs. Fisher, after a pause, said with a slightly sarcastic tone that she had never heard of either Keats or Shakespeare.

“Oh of course—how ridiculous of me!” cried Mrs. Wilkins, flushing scarlet. “It’s because”—she floundered—“it’s because the immortals somehow still seem alive, don’t they—as if they were here, going to walk into the room in another minute—and one forgets they are dead. In fact one knows perfectly well that they’re not dead—not nearly so dead as you and I even now,” she assured Mrs. Fisher, who observed her over the top of her glasses.

“Oh of course—how silly of me!” gasped Mrs. Wilkins, turning bright red. “It’s because”—she hesitated—“it’s because the immortals somehow still feel alive, right? As if they’re about to walk into the room any minute—and you forget they’re dead. In fact, you know very well that they’re not dead—not nearly as dead as you and I are, even now,” she told Mrs. Fisher, who looked at her over the top of her glasses.

“I thought I saw Keats the other day,” Mrs. Wilkins incoherently proceeded, driven on by Mrs. Fisher’s look over the top of her glasses. “In Hampstead—crossing the road in front of that house—you know—the house where he lived—”

“I thought I saw Keats the other day,” Mrs. Wilkins ramblingly continued, pushed on by Mrs. Fisher’s gaze over the top of her glasses. “In Hampstead—crossing the street in front of that house—you know—the house where he lived—”

Mrs. Arbuthnot said they must be going.

Mrs. Arbuthnot said they had to leave.

Mrs. Fisher did nothing to prevent them.

Mrs. Fisher didn’t do anything to stop them.

“I really thought I saw him,” protested Mrs. Wilkins, appealing for belief first to one and then to the other while waves of colour passed over her face, and totally unable to stop because of Mrs. Fisher’s glasses and the steady eyes looking at her over their tops. “I believe I did see him—he was dressed in a—”

“I really thought I saw him,” protested Mrs. Wilkins, seeking validation first from one and then the other as waves of color crossed her face, unable to stop because of Mrs. Fisher’s glasses and the steady gaze over their rims. “I believe I did see him—he was dressed in a—”

Even Mrs. Arbuthnot looked at her now, and in her gentlest voice said they would be late for lunch.

Even Mrs. Arbuthnot looked at her now and, in her gentlest voice, said they would be late for lunch.

It was at this point that Mrs. Fisher asked for references. She had no wish to find herself shut up for four weeks with somebody who saw things. It is true that there were three sitting-rooms, besides the garden and the battlements at San Salvatore, so that there would be opportunities of withdrawal from Mrs. Wilkins; but it would be disagreeable to Mrs. Fisher, for instance, if Mrs. Wilkins were suddenly to assert that she saw Mr. Fisher. Mr. Fisher was dead; let him remain so. She had no wish to be told he was walking about the garden. The only reference she really wanted, for she was much too old and firmly seated in her place in the world for questionable associates to matter to her, was one with regard to Mrs. Wilkins’s health. Was her health quite normal? Was she an ordinary, everyday, sensible woman? Mrs. Fisher felt that if she were given even one address she would be able to find out what she needed. So she asked for references, and her visitors appeared to be so much taken aback—Mrs. Wilkins, indeed, was instantly sobered—that she added, “It is usual.”

It was at that moment that Mrs. Fisher requested references. She didn't want to spend four weeks with someone who claimed to see things. While it was true there were three sitting rooms, along with the garden and the battlements at San Salvatore, providing chances to avoid Mrs. Wilkins, it would still be uncomfortable for Mrs. Fisher if Mrs. Wilkins suddenly insisted she could see Mr. Fisher. Mr. Fisher was dead; let him stay that way. She had no interest in hearing that he was wandering around the garden. The only reference she genuinely wanted, since she was too old and secure in her place in the world to care about unreliable company, was one concerning Mrs. Wilkins's health. Was her health perfectly normal? Was she just a regular, sensible woman? Mrs. Fisher believed that if she got even one address, she could find out what she needed. So she asked for references, and her visitors looked so surprised—Mrs. Wilkins was even instantly more serious—that she added, “It's standard practice.”

Mrs. Wilkins found her speech first. “But,” she said, “aren’t we the ones who ought to ask for some from you?”

Mrs. Wilkins found her words first. “But,” she said, “aren’t we the ones who should be asking you for some?”

And this seemed to Mrs. Arbuthnot too the right attitude. Surely it was they who were taking Mrs. Fisher into their party, and not Mrs. Fisher who was taking them into it?

And this seemed to Mrs. Arbuthnot to be the right attitude. Surely they were the ones bringing Mrs. Fisher into their group, not the other way around?

For answer Mrs. Fisher, leaning on her stick, went to the writing-table and in a firm hand wrote down three names and offered them to Mrs. Wilkins, and the names were so respectable, more, they were so momentous, they were so nearly august, that just to read them was enough. The President of the Royal Academy, the Archbishop of Canterbury, and the Governor of the Bank of England—who would dare disturb such personages in their meditations with inquiries as to whether a female friend of theirs was all she should be?

In response, Mrs. Fisher, leaning on her cane, walked over to the writing table and confidently wrote down three names, which she then offered to Mrs. Wilkins. The names were not just respectable; they were so significant, so nearly distinguished, that just reading them was impressive enough. The President of the Royal Academy, the Archbishop of Canterbury, and the Governor of the Bank of England—who would have the audacity to interrupt such prominent figures with questions about whether a female friend of theirs was everything she ought to be?

“They have known me since I was little,” said Mrs. Fisher—everybody seemed to have known Mrs. Fisher since or when she was little.

“They've known me since I was little,” said Mrs. Fisher—everyone seemed to have known Mrs. Fisher since she was a kid.

“I don’t think references are nice things at all between—between ordinary decent women,” burst out Mrs. Wilkins, made courageous by being, as she felt, at bay; for she very well knew that the only reference she could give without getting into trouble was Shoolbred, and she had little confidence in that, as it would be entirely based on Mellersh’s fish. “We’re not business people. We needn’t distrust each other—”

“I don’t think references are good things at all between—between ordinary decent women,” Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed, feeling brave because she felt cornered; she knew that the only reference she could provide without getting into trouble was Shoolbred, and she had little faith in that since it would completely depend on Mellersh’s fish. “We’re not in business. We shouldn't distrust each other—”

And Mrs. Arbuthnot said, with a dignity that yet was sweet, “I’m afraid references do bring an atmosphere into our holiday plan that isn’t quite what we want, and I don’t think we’ll take yours up or give you any ourselves. So that I suppose you won’t wish to join us.”

And Mrs. Arbuthnot said, with a dignity that was still gentle, “I’m afraid references create an atmosphere in our holiday plans that isn’t exactly what we’re looking for, so I don’t think we’ll accept yours or provide any ourselves. So I guess you won’t want to join us.”

And she held out her hand in good-bye.

And she extended her hand in farewell.

Then Mrs. Fisher, her gaze diverted to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who inspired trust and liking even in Tube officials, felt that she would be idiotic to lose the opportunity of being in Italy in the particular conditions offered, and that she and this calm-browed woman between them would certainly be able to curb the other one when she had her attacks. So she said, taking Mrs. Arbuthnot’s offered hand, “Very well. I waive references.”

Then Mrs. Fisher, looking over at Mrs. Arbuthnot, who inspired trust and friendliness even in Tube officials, realized it would be foolish to miss the chance to be in Italy under these particular circumstances. She felt that she and the calm-faced woman could definitely handle the other one during her outbursts. So, she said, taking Mrs. Arbuthnot’s hand, “Alright. I’ll skip the references.”

She waived references.

She waived references.

The two as they walked to the station in Kensington High Street could not help thinking that this way of putting it was lofty. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot, spendthrift of excuses for lapses, thought Mrs. Fisher might have used other words; and Mrs. Wilkins, by the time she got to the station, and the walk and the struggle on the crowded pavement with other people’s umbrellas had warmed her blood, actually suggested waiving Mrs. Fisher.

The two of them, as they walked to the station on Kensington High Street, couldn't help but feel that this way of saying things was a bit over the top. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot, who often came up with excuses for mistakes, thought Mrs. Fisher could have chosen different words; and by the time Mrs. Wilkins reached the station, the walk and the struggle with other people’s umbrellas on the crowded sidewalk had stirred her up enough to actually suggest just letting Mrs. Fisher go.

“If there is any waiving to be done, do let us be the ones who waive,” she said eagerly.

“If there's any waiving to be done, let us be the ones to do it,” she said eagerly.

But Mrs. Arbuthnot, as usual, held on to Mrs. Wilkins; and presently, having cooled down in the train, Mrs. Wilkins announced that at San Salvatore Mrs. Fisher would find her level. “I see her finding her level there,” she said, her eyes very bright.

But Mrs. Arbuthnot, as usual, stuck with Mrs. Wilkins; and after they calmed down on the train, Mrs. Wilkins said that at San Salvatore, Mrs. Fisher would find her place. “I can picture her finding her place there,” she said, her eyes very bright.

Whereupon Mrs. Arbuthnot, sitting with her quiet hands folded, turned over in her mind how best she could help Mrs. Wilkins not to see quite so much; or at least, if she must see, to see in silence.

Whereupon Mrs. Arbuthnot, sitting with her hands quietly folded, considered how she could help Mrs. Wilkins not to see so much; or at least, if she had to see, to do so in silence.

Chapter 4

It had been arranged that Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins, travelling together, should arrive at San Salvatore on the evening of March 31st—the owner, who told them how to get there, appreciated their disinclination to begin their time in it on April 1st—and Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher, as yet unacquainted and therefore under no obligations to bore each other on the journey, for only towards the end would they find out by a process of sifting who they were, were to arrive on the morning of April 2nd. In this way everything would be got nicely ready for the two who seemed, in spite of the equality of the sharing, yet to have something about them of guests.

Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins had planned to travel together and arrive at San Salvatore on the evening of March 31st—the owner, who gave them directions, understood their reluctance to start their stay on April 1st. Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher, who didn’t know each other yet and were therefore not obliged to endure each other during the trip, would arrive on the morning of April 2nd. This arrangement would ensure that everything was perfectly set up for the two who, despite equally sharing the experience, still gave off a vibe of being guests.

There were disagreeable incidents towards the end of March, when Mrs. Wilkins, her heart in her mouth and her face a mixture of guilt, terror and determination, told her husband that she had been invited to Italy, and he declined to believe it. Of course he declined to believe it. Nobody had ever invited his wife to Italy before. There was no precedent. He required proofs. The only proof was Mrs. Arbuthnot, and Mrs. Wilkins had produced her; but after what entreaties, what passionate persuading! Mrs. Arbuthnot had not imagined she would have to face Mr. Wilkins and say things to him that were short of the truth, and it brought home to her what she had for some time suspected, that she was slipping more and more away from God.

There were some unpleasant moments toward the end of March when Mrs. Wilkins, her heart racing and her face showing a mix of guilt, fear, and determination, told her husband that she had been invited to Italy, and he refused to believe it. Naturally, he refused to believe it. No one had ever invited his wife to Italy before. There was no precedent for that. He needed proof. The only proof was Mrs. Arbuthnot, and Mrs. Wilkins had managed to bring her forward; but after so many pleas and intense persuasion! Mrs. Arbuthnot hadn’t expected to face Mr. Wilkins and say things to him that didn’t fully align with the truth, which made her realize what she had been suspecting for some time—that she was drifting further away from God.

Indeed, the whole of March was filled with unpleasant, anxious moments. It was an uneasy month. Mrs. Arbuthnot’s conscience, made super-sensitive by years of pampering, could not reconcile what she was doing with its own high standard of what was right. It gave her little peace. It nudged her at her prayers. It punctuated her entreaties for divine guidance with disconcerting questions, such as, “Are you not a hypocrite? Do you really mean that? Would you not, frankly, be disappointed if that prayer were granted?”

Indeed, the entire month of March was filled with uncomfortable, anxious moments. It was a tense month. Mrs. Arbuthnot’s conscience, overly sensitive from years of indulgence, couldn’t align her actions with its own high standards of what was right. It provided her with little peace. It poked at her during her prayers. It interrupted her pleas for divine guidance with troubling questions, like, “Aren’t you being hypocritical? Do you truly mean that? Wouldn’t you honestly be disappointed if that prayer were answered?”

The prolonged wet, raw weather was on the side too of her conscience, producing far more sickness than usual among the poor. They had bronchitis; they had fevers; there was no end to the distress. And here she was going off, spending precious money on going off, simply and solely to be happy. One woman. One woman being happy, and these piteous multitudes . . .

The long, wet, chilly weather weighed on her mind too, causing much more illness than usual among those in need. They had bronchitis; they had fevers; the suffering seemed never-ending. And here she was, spending valuable money just to be happy. One woman. One woman seeking happiness, while these miserable many...

She was unable to look the vicar in the face. He did not know, nobody knew, what she was going to do, and from the very beginning she was unable to look anybody in the face. She excused herself from making speeches appealing for money. How could she stand up and ask people for money when she herself was spending so much on her own selfish pleasure? Nor did it help her or quiet her that, having actually told Frederick, in her desire to make up for what she was squandering, that she would be grateful if he would let her have some money, he instantly gave her a cheque for £100. He asked no questions. She was scarlet. He looked at her a moment and then looked away. It was a relief to Frederick that she should take some money. She gave it all immediately to the organisation she worked with, and found herself more tangled in doubts than ever.

She couldn't look the vicar in the eye. He didn’t know, no one did, what she was planning to do, and from the start, she struggled to meet anyone's gaze. She avoided giving speeches to raise money. How could she stand up and ask others for funds when she was spending so much on her own selfish enjoyment? It didn't help or calm her that, after admitting to Frederick that she would appreciate it if he could lend her some money to make up for her wastefulness, he immediately handed her a check for £100. He didn’t ask any questions. She felt embarrassed. He glanced at her for a moment before looking away. It was a relief for Frederick that she accepted the money. She immediately gave it all to the organization she worked with and found herself more entangled in doubts than ever.

Mrs. Wilkins, on the contrary, had no doubts. She was quite certain that it was a most proper thing to have a holiday, and altogether right and beautiful to spend one’s own hard-collected savings on being happy.

Mrs. Wilkins, on the other hand, had no doubts. She was totally convinced that taking a holiday was completely appropriate and entirely right and beautiful to spend her hard-earned savings on being happy.

“Think how much nicer we shall be when we come back,” she said to Mrs. Arbuthnot, encouraging that pale lady.

“Just imagine how much nicer we’ll be when we return,” she said to Mrs. Arbuthnot, encouraging the pale woman.

No, Mrs. Wilkins had no doubts, but she had fears; and March was for her too an anxious month, with the unconscious Mr. Wilkins coming back daily to his dinner and eating his fish in the silence of imagined security.

No, Mrs. Wilkins didn’t have any doubts, but she had concerns; and March was also a stressful month for her, with the oblivious Mr. Wilkins returning home every day for dinner and eating his fish in the quiet of his imagined security.

Also things happen so awkwardly. It really is astonishing, how awkwardly they happen. Mrs. Wilkins, who was very careful all this month to give Mellersh only the food he liked, buying it and hovering over its cooking with a zeal more than common, succeeded so well that Mellersh was pleased; definitely pleased; so much pleased that he began to think that he might, after all, have married the right wife instead of, as he had frequently suspected, the wrong one. The result was that on the third Sunday in the month—Mrs. Wilkins had made up her trembling mind that on the fourth Sunday, there being five in that March and it being on the fifth of them that she and Mrs. Arbuthnot were to start, she would tell Mellersh of her invitation—on the third Sunday, then, after a very well-cooked lunch in which the Yorkshire pudding had melted in his mouth and the apricot tart had been so perfect that he ate it all, Mellersh, smoking his cigar by the brightly burning fire the while hail gusts banged on the window, said: “I am thinking of taking you to Italy for Easter.” And paused for her astounded and grateful ecstasy.

Also, things happen so awkwardly. It's really surprising how awkwardly they happen. Mrs. Wilkins, who had been very careful all month to only give Mellersh the food he liked, buying it and overseeing its cooking with an uncommon enthusiasm, succeeded so well that Mellersh was pleased; definitely pleased; so much so that he began to think he might, after all, have married the right wife instead of, as he had often suspected, the wrong one. As a result, on the third Sunday of the month—Mrs. Wilkins had made up her nervous mind that on the fourth Sunday, there being five in that March and on the fifth of them she and Mrs. Arbuthnot would start, she would tell Mellersh about her invitation—on the third Sunday, then, after a very well-cooked lunch in which the Yorkshire pudding melted in his mouth and the apricot tart was so perfect he finished it completely, Mellersh, smoking his cigar by the bright fire while hail gusts thudded against the window, said: “I’m thinking of taking you to Italy for Easter.” And he paused for her astonished and grateful excitement.

None came. The silence in the room, except for the hail hitting the windows and the gay roar of the fire, was complete. Mrs. Wilkins could not speak. She was dumbfounded. The next Sunday was the day she had meant to break her news to him, and she had not yet even prepared the form of words in which she would break it.

None came. The silence in the room, except for the hail hitting the windows and the cheerful crackle of the fire, was total. Mrs. Wilkins couldn’t speak. She was stunned. The next Sunday was when she had planned to share her news with him, and she hadn’t even figured out how she would say it.

Mr. Wilkins, who had not been abroad since before the war, and was noticing with increasing disgust, as week followed week of wind and rain, the peculiar persistent vileness of the weather, had slowly conceived a desire to get away from England for Easter. He was doing very well in his business. He could afford a trip. Switzerland was useless in April. There was a familiar sound about Easter in Italy. To Italy he would go; and as it would cause comment if he did not take his wife, take her he must—besides, she would be useful; a second person was always useful in a country whose language one did not speak for holding things, for waiting with the luggage.

Mr. Wilkins, who hadn't traveled abroad since before the war, was growing increasingly frustrated with the constant wind and rain, and the awful weather seemed to drag on week after week. He gradually developed a strong urge to escape England for Easter. Business was going well for him, and he could afford a trip. Switzerland wasn’t appealing in April. Easter in Italy felt familiar and inviting. So, he decided to go to Italy; and since it would raise eyebrows if he didn’t take his wife, he figured he had to bring her along—plus, she would be helpful. Having someone else around is always useful in a country where you don’t speak the language, especially for managing luggage and waiting around.

He had expected an explosion of gratitude and excitement. The absence of it was incredible. She could not, he concluded, have heard. Probably she was absorbed in some foolish day-dream. It was regrettable how childish she remained.

He expected her to be filled with gratitude and excitement. The lack of it was shocking. He reasoned that she must not have heard him. Most likely, she was lost in some silly daydream. It was unfortunate how childish she still was.

He turned his head—their chairs were in front of the fire—and looked at her. She was staring straight into the fire, and it was no doubt the fire that made her face so red.

He turned his head—their chairs were in front of the fire—and looked at her. She was staring straight into the fire, and it was definitely the fire that made her face so red.

“I am thinking,” he repeated, raising his clear, cultivated voice and speaking with acerbity, for inattention at such a moment was deplorable, “of taking you to Italy for Easter. Did you not hear me?”

“I’m thinking,” he repeated, raising his clear, refined voice and speaking sharply, because not paying attention at such a time was unacceptable, “of taking you to Italy for Easter. Didn’t you hear me?”

Yes, she had heard him, and she had been wondering at the extraordinary coincidence—really most extraordinary—she was just going to tell him how—how she had been invited—a friend had invited her—Easter, too—Easter was in April, wasn’t it?—her friend had a—had a house there.

Yes, she had heard him, and she had been thinking about the amazing coincidence—really quite amazing—she was just about to tell him how—how she had been invited—a friend had invited her—Easter, too—Easter was in April, right?—her friend had a—had a place there.

In fact Mrs. Wilkins, driven by terror, guilt and surprise, had been more incoherent if possible than usual.

In fact, Mrs. Wilkins, overwhelmed by fear, guilt, and shock, had been even more incoherent than usual.

It was a dreadful afternoon. Mellersh, profoundly indignant, besides having his intended treat coming back on him like a blessing to roost, cross-examined her with the utmost severity. He demanded that she refuse the invitation. He demanded that, since she had so outrageously accepted it without consulting him, she should write and cancel her acceptance. Finding himself up against an unsuspected, shocking rock of obstinacy in her, he then declined to believe she had been invited to Italy at all. He declined to believe in this Mrs. Arbuthnot, of whom till that moment he had never heard; and it was only when the gentle creature was brought round—with such difficulty, with such a desire on her part to throw the whole thing up rather than tell Mr. Wilkins less than the truth—and herself endorsed his wife’s statements that he was able to give them credence. He could not but believe Mrs. Arbuthnot. She produced the precise effect on him that she did on Tube officials. She hardly needed to say anything. But that made no difference to her conscience, which knew and would not let her forget that she had given him an incomplete impression. “Do you,” asked her conscience, “see any real difference between an incomplete impression and a completely stated lie? God sees none.”

It was a terrible afternoon. Mellersh, deeply upset, and with his planned treat hovering over him like a curse, questioned her with the utmost strictness. He insisted that she turn down the invitation. He insisted that, since she had shockingly accepted it without consulting him, she should write and cancel her acceptance. When he encountered an unexpected and infuriating wall of stubbornness from her, he refused to believe she had been invited to Italy at all. He refused to acknowledge this Mrs. Arbuthnot, who he had never heard of until that moment; it was only when the gentle woman was brought in—after much struggle and with her wanting to abandon the whole affair rather than tell Mr. Wilkins anything less than the truth—and when she confirmed his wife's stories that he was finally able to accept them. He couldn’t help but believe Mrs. Arbuthnot. She had the same effect on him as she did on Tube officials. She hardly needed to say anything. But that didn’t change her conscience, which was aware and wouldn’t let her forget that she had given him an incomplete impression. “Do you,” her conscience asked, “see any real difference between an incomplete impression and a complete lie? God sees none.”

The remainder of March was a confused bad dream. Both Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins were shattered; try as they would not to, both felt extraordinarily guilty; and when on the morning of the 30th they did finally get off there was no exhilaration about the departure, no holiday feeling at all.

The rest of March was a chaotic nightmare. Both Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins were completely worn out; no matter how hard they tried not to, they both felt incredibly guilty. And when they finally left on the morning of the 30th, there was no sense of excitement about the departure, no vacation vibe whatsoever.

“We’ve been too good—much too good,” Mrs. Wilkins kept on murmuring as they walked up and down the platform at Victoria, having arrived there an hour before they need have, “and that’s why we feel as though we’re doing wrong. We’re brow-beaten—we’re not any longer real human beings. Real human beings aren’t ever as good as we’ve been. Oh”—she clenched her thin hands—“to think that we ought to be so happy now, here on the very station, actually starting, and we’re not, and it’s being spoilt for us just simply because we’ve spoilt them! What have we done—what have we done, I should like to know,” she inquired of Mrs. Arbuthnot indignantly, “except for once want to go away by ourselves and have a little rest from them?

“We’ve been too good—way too good,” Mrs. Wilkins kept murmuring as they walked back and forth on the platform at Victoria after arriving an hour early, “and that’s why we feel like we’re doing something wrong. We’re beaten down—we’re no longer real human beings. Real human beings aren’t as good as we’ve been. Oh”—she clenched her thin hands—“to think that we should be so happy now, right here at the station, actually starting, and yet we’re not, and it’s being ruined for us just because we’ve ruined them! What have we done—what have we done, I want to know,” she asked Mrs. Arbuthnot angrily, “except for once wanting to get away by ourselves and have a little break from them?

Mrs. Arbuthnot, patiently pacing, did not ask who she meant by them, because she knew. Mrs. Wilkins meant their husbands, persisting in her assumption that Frederick was as indignant as Mellersh over the departure of his wife, whereas Frederick did not even know his wife had gone.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, walking back and forth patiently, didn’t ask who she meant by them, because she already knew. Mrs. Wilkins was referring to their husbands, holding onto her belief that Frederick was just as upset as Mellersh about the departure of his wife, while in reality, Frederick didn’t even know his wife had left.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, always silent about him, had said nothing of this to Mrs. Wilkins. Frederick went too deep into her heart for her to talk about him. He was having an extra bout of work finishing another of those dreadful books, and had been away practically continually the last few weeks, and was away when she left. Why should she tell him beforehand? Sure as she so miserably was that he would have no objection to anything she did, she merely wrote him a note and put it on the hall-table ready for him if and when he should come home. She said she was going for a month’s holiday as she needed a rest and she had not had one for so long, and that Gladys, the efficient parlourmaid, had orders to see to his comforts. She did not say where she was going; there was no reason why she should; he would not be interested, he would not care.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, always quiet about him, hadn’t mentioned anything to Mrs. Wilkins. Frederick meant too much to her for her to discuss him. He was buried in work, finishing another one of those terrible books, and had been away almost constantly for the last few weeks, gone when she left. Why should she tell him in advance? Even though she was painfully sure he wouldn’t mind anything she did, she just wrote him a note and left it on the hall table for him if and when he came home. She said she was going for a month-long vacation because she needed a break, and she hadn’t had one for such a long time. She mentioned that Gladys, the capable parlormaid, had instructions to take care of his needs. She didn’t say where she was going; there was no need to; he wouldn’t be interested, he wouldn’t care.

The day was wretched, blustering and wet; the crossing was atrocious, and they were very sick. But after having been very sick, just to arrive at Calais and not be sick was happiness, and it was there that the real splendour of what they were doing first began to warm their benumbed spirits. It got hold of Mrs. Wilkins first, and spread from her like a rose-coloured flame over her pale companion. Mellersh at Calais, where they restored themselves with soles because of Mrs. Wilkins’s desire to eat a sole Mellersh wasn’t having—Mellersh at Calais had already begun to dwindle and seem less important. None of the French porters knew him; not a single official at Calais cared a fig for Mellersh. In Paris there was no time to think of him because their train was late and they only just caught the Turin train at the Gare de Lyons; and by the afternoon of the next day when they got into Italy, England, Frederick, Mellersh, the vicar, the poor, Hampstead, the club, Shoolbred, everybody and everything, the whole inflamed sore dreariness, had faded to the dimness of a dream.

The day was miserable, windy, and rainy; the crossing was terrible, and they both felt really sick. But after feeling so sick, just arriving in Calais and not being sick was a relief, and that’s when the true joy of what they were doing started to lift their spirits. It sparked in Mrs. Wilkins first and spread like a warm, pink flame over her pale companion. Mellersh in Calais, where they refueled with fish because Mrs. Wilkins wanted to eat sole that Mellersh wasn’t interested in—Mellersh in Calais already began to fade and seem less significant. None of the French porters knew who he was; not one official in Calais cared at all about Mellersh. In Paris, there was no time to think about him because their train was late, and they barely made it on the train to Turin at the Gare de Lyon. By the afternoon of the next day when they arrived in Italy, England, Frederick, Mellersh, the vicar, the poor, Hampstead, the club, Shoolbred—everyone and everything, the whole nagging, dreary feeling—had faded into the haze of a dream.

Chapter 5

It was cloudy in Italy, which surprised them. They had expected brilliant sunshine. But never mind: it was Italy, and the very clouds looked fat. Neither of them had ever been there before. Both gazed out of the windows with rapt faces. The hours flew as long as it was daylight, and after that there was the excitement of getting nearer, getting quite near, getting there. At Genoa it had begun to rain—Genoa! Imagine actually being at Genoa, seeing its name written up in the station just like any other name—at Nervi it was pouring, and when at last towards midnight, for again the train was late, they got to Mezzago, the rain was coming down in what seemed solid sheets. But it was Italy. Nothing it did could be bad. The very rain was different—straight rain, falling properly on to one’s umbrella; not that violently blowing English stuff that got in everywhere. And it did leave off; and when it did, behold the earth would be strewn with roses.

It was cloudy in Italy, which surprised them. They had expected bright sunshine. But never mind: it was Italy, and the clouds looked fluffy. Neither of them had ever been there before. Both stared out of the windows with excited expressions. The hours flew by as long as it was daylight, and after that, there was the thrill of getting closer, getting really close, getting there. In Genoa, it had started to rain—Genoa! Can you believe they were actually in Genoa, seeing its name posted in the station just like any other name—at Nervi it was pouring, and finally, towards midnight, since the train was late again, they arrived in Mezzago, and the rain was coming down like solid sheets. But it was Italy. Nothing it did could be bad. The rain itself felt different—straight rain, falling neatly onto one’s umbrella; not that aggressive English stuff that got everywhere. And it did stop; and when it did, look! The earth was scattered with roses.

Mr. Briggs, San Salvatore’s owner, had said, “You get out at Mezzago, and then you drive.” But he had forgotten what he amply knew, that trains in Italy are sometimes late, and he had imagined his tenants arriving at Mezzago at eight o’clock and finding a string of flys to choose from.

Mr. Briggs, the owner of San Salvatore, had said, “You’ll get off at Mezzago, and then you’ll drive.” But he had forgotten what he clearly knew: that trains in Italy are sometimes late. He had envisioned his tenants arriving at Mezzago at eight o’clock and finding a line of cabs to choose from.

The train was four hours late, and when Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins scrambled down the ladder-like high steps of their carriage into the black downpour, their skirts sweeping off great pools of sooty wet because their hands were full of suit-cases, if it had not been for the vigilance of Domenico, the gardener at San Salvatore, they would have found nothing for them to drive in. All ordinary flys had long since gone home. Domenico, foreseeing this, had sent his aunt’s fly, driven by her son his cousin; and his aunt and her fly lived in Castagneto, the village crouching at the feet of San Salvatore, and therefore, however late the train was, the fly would not dare come home without containing that which it had been sent to fetch.

The train was four hours late, and when Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins climbed down the steep steps of their carriage into the heavy rain, their skirts soaking up large puddles of dirty water because their hands were full of suitcases, if it hadn’t been for the quick thinking of Domenico, the gardener at San Salvatore, they wouldn’t have found anything to drive in. All the regular cabs had already gone home. Domenico had anticipated this and sent his aunt’s cab, driven by his cousin; and his aunt and her cab were based in Castagneto, the village at the foot of San Salvatore, so no matter how late the train was, the cab wouldn’t have dared return without what it was sent to pick up.

Domenico’s cousin’s name was Beppo, and he presently emerged out of the dark where Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins stood, uncertain what to do next after the train had gone on, for they could see no porter and they thought from the feel of it that they were standing not so much on a platform as in the middle of the permanent way.

Domenico’s cousin was named Beppo, and he suddenly appeared from the darkness near where Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins were standing, unsure of what to do next after the train had left. They couldn't see any porters, and it felt to them like they were standing not on a platform but right in the middle of the tracks.

Beppo, who had been searching for them, emerged from the dark with a kind of pounce and talked Italian to them vociferously. Beppo was a most respectable young man, but he did not look as if he were, especially not in the dark, and he had a dripping hat slouched over one eye. They did not like the way he seized their suit-cases. He could not be, they thought, a porter. However, they presently from out of his streaming talk discerned the words San Salvatore, and after that they kept on saying them to him, for it was the only Italian they knew, as they hurried after him, unwilling to lose sight of their suit-cases, stumbling across rails and through puddles out to where in the road a small, high fly stood.

Beppo, who had been looking for them, suddenly appeared from the darkness and started speaking Italian to them loudly. Beppo was a very respectable young man, but he didn't look it, especially in the dark, with a wet hat tilted over one eye. They didn’t like how he grabbed their suitcases. They thought he couldn’t possibly be a porter. However, they soon picked out the words "San Salvatore" from his stream of talk, and after that, they kept repeating it to him since it was the only Italian they knew, hurriedly following him and not wanting to lose sight of their suitcases, tripping over tracks and splashing through puddles until they reached where a small, high fly was waiting on the road.

Its hood was up, and its horse was in an attitude of thought. They climbed in, and the minute they were in—Mrs. Wilkins, indeed, could hardly be called in—the horse awoke with a start from its reverie and immediately began going home rapidly; without Beppo; without the suit-cases.

Its hood was up, and its horse looked like it was deep in thought. They got in, and as soon as they were inside—Mrs. Wilkins barely making it in—the horse jolted awake from its daydream and immediately started rushing back home; without Beppo; without the suitcases.

Beppo darted after him, making the night ring with his shouts, and caught the hanging reins just in time. He explained proudly, and as it seemed to him with perfect clearness, that the horse always did that, being a fine animal full of corn and blood, and cared for by him, Beppo, as if he were his own son, and the ladies must not be alarmed—he had noticed they were clutching each other; but clear, and loud, and profuse of words though he was, they only looked at him blankly.

Beppo ran after him, making the night echo with his shouts, and grabbed the loose reins just in time. He proudly explained—what he thought was very clearly—that the horse always acted like that, being a great animal full of energy and spirit, and he, Beppo, took care of it as if it were his own son. The ladies didn’t need to worry—he noticed they were clutching each other—but even with his clear, loud, and flowing words, they just stared at him blankly.

He went on talking, however, while he piled the suit-cases up round them, sure that sooner or later they must understand him, especially as he was careful to talk very loud and illustrate everything he said with the simplest elucidatory gestures, but they both continued only to look at him. They both, he noticed sympathetically, had white faces, fatigued faces, and they both had big eyes, fatigued eyes. They were beautiful ladies, he thought, and their eyes, looking at him over the tops of the suit-cases watching his every movement—there were no trunks, only numbers of suit-cases—were like the eyes of the Mother of God. The only thing the ladies said, and they repeated it at regular intervals, even after they had started, gently prodding him as he sat on his box to call his attention to it, was, “San Salvatore?”

He kept talking while stacking the suitcases around them, confident that they would understand him eventually, especially since he made sure to speak loudly and used simple gestures to illustrate his points. But they just continued to stare at him. He noticed, with sympathy, that they both had pale, tired faces and large, weary eyes. They were beautiful women, he thought, and their eyes—watching him over the suitcases, tracking his every move—reminded him of the eyes of the Mother of God. The only thing they said, repeating it at regular intervals even after they had started moving, gently nudging him as he sat on his box to get his attention, was, “San Salvatore?”

And each time he answered vociferously, encouragingly, “Sì, sì—San Salvatore.”

And each time he responded loudly and supportively, “Yes, yes—San Salvatore.”

“We don’t know of course if he’s taking us there,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot at last in a low voice, after they had been driving as it seemed to them a long while, and had got off the paving-stones of the sleep-shrouded town and were out on a winding road with what they could just see was a low wall on their left beyond which was a great black emptiness and the sound of the sea. On their right was something close and steep and high and black—rocks, they whispered to each other; huge rocks.

“We don’t know, of course, if he’s taking us there,” Mrs. Arbuthnot finally said in a quiet voice after they had been driving for what felt like a long time. They had left the cobblestones of the sleepy town behind and were now on a winding road. To their left was a low wall, beyond which they could barely make out a vast, dark emptiness and the sound of the sea. On their right was something dense, steep, tall, and dark—rocks, they whispered to each other; massive rocks.

“No—we don’t know,” agreed Mrs. Wilkins, a slight coldness passing down her spine.

“No—we don’t know,” Mrs. Wilkins agreed, a slight chill running down her spine.

They felt very uncomfortable. It was so late. It was so dark. The road was so lonely. Suppose a wheel came off. Suppose they met Fascisti, or the opposite of Fascisti. How sorry they were now that they had not slept at Genoa and come on the next morning in daylight.

They felt really uneasy. It was so late. It was so dark. The road was so empty. What if a wheel came off? What if they ran into Fascists or their enemies? They regretted not staying in Genoa and traveling the next morning in the daylight.

“But that would have been the first of April,” said Mrs. Wilkins, in a low voice.

“But that would have been April first,” Mrs. Wilkins said quietly.

“It is that now,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot beneath her breath.

“It is that now,” murmured Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“So it is,” murmured Mrs. Wilkins.

“So it is,” Mrs. Wilkins murmured.

They were silent.

They were quiet.

Beppo turned round on his box—a disquieting habit already noticed, for surely his horse ought to be carefully watched—and again addressed them with what he was convinced was lucidity—no patois, and the clearest explanatory movements.

Beppo turned around on his seat—a troubling habit that had already been noted, since his horse definitely needed to be watched closely—and again spoke to them with what he believed was clarity—no patois, and the most straightforward gestures.

How much they wished their mothers had made them learn Italian when they were little. If only now they could have said, “Please sit round the right way and look after the horse.” They did not even know what horse was in Italian. It was contemptible to be so ignorant.

How much they wished their moms had made them learn Italian when they were kids. If only they could say, “Please sit around the right way and take care of the horse.” They didn’t even know what horse was in Italian. It felt shameful to be so clueless.

In their anxiety, for the road twisted round great jutting rocks, and on their left was only the low wall to keep them out of the sea should anything happen, they too began to gesticulate, waving their hands at Beppo, pointing ahead. They wanted him to turn round again and face his horse, that was all. He thought they wanted him to drive faster; and there followed a terrifying ten minutes during which, as he supposed, he was gratifying them. He was proud of his horse, and it could go very fast. He rose in his seat, the whip cracked, the horse rushed forward, the rocks leaped towards them, the little fly swayed, the suit-cases heaved, Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins clung. In this way they continued, swaying, heaving, clattering, clinging, till at a point near Castagneto there was a rise in the road, and on reaching the foot of the rise the horse, who knew every inch of the way, stopped suddenly, throwing everything in the fly into a heap, and then proceeded up at the slowest of walks.

In their anxiety, as the road twisted around huge jutting rocks and on their left was just a low wall to keep them from falling into the sea if anything went wrong, they also started waving their hands at Beppo, pointing ahead. They wanted him to turn around again and face his horse, that was all. He thought they wanted him to go faster; and there followed a terrifying ten minutes during which, as he thought, he was making them happy. He was proud of his horse, and it could go really fast. He rose in his seat, cracked the whip, and the horse took off, rushing forward as the rocks zoomed towards them, the little carriage swayed, the suitcases bounced, and Mrs. Arbuthnot and Mrs. Wilkins held on tightly. They kept this up, swaying, bouncing, clattering, and clinging, until they reached a point near Castagneto where the road inclined. When they got to the foot of the incline, the horse, who knew the route perfectly, stopped suddenly, sending everything in the carriage tumbling into a heap, and then continued up at a slow walk.

Beppo twisted himself round to receive their admiration, laughing with pride in his horse.

Beppo turned around to soak in their admiration, laughing proudly at his horse.

There was no answering laugh from the beautiful ladies. Their eyes, fixed on him, seemed bigger than ever, and their faces against the black of the night showed milky.

There was no responding laugh from the beautiful women. Their eyes, locked on him, appeared bigger than ever, and their faces against the dark of the night looked pale.

But here at least, once they were up the slope, were houses. The rocks left off, and there were houses; the low wall left off, and there were houses; the sea shrunk away, and the sound of it ceased, and the loneliness of the road was finished. No lights anywhere, of course, nobody to see them pass; and yet Beppo, when the houses began, after looking over his shoulder and shouting “Castagneto” at the ladies, once more stood up and cracked his whip and once more made his horse dash forward.

But here at least, once they climbed the hill, there were houses. The rocks stopped, and there were houses; the low wall faded away, and there were houses; the sea receded, and the sound of it disappeared, ending the loneliness of the road. No lights anywhere, of course, no one to see them pass; and yet Beppo, when the houses appeared, after looking over his shoulder and shouting “Castagneto” to the ladies, stood up again, cracked his whip, and made his horse gallop forward once more.

“We shall be there in a minute,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said to herself, holding on.

“We'll be there in a minute,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said to herself, holding on.

“We shall soon stop now,” Mrs. Wilkins said to herself, holding on. They said nothing aloud, because nothing would have been heard above the whip-cracking and the wheel-clattering and the boisterous inciting noises Beppo was making at his horse.

“We’ll be stopping soon,” Mrs. Wilkins said to herself, hanging on. They didn’t say anything out loud, because their voices would have been drowned out by the whip-cracking, wheel-clattering, and the loud urging noises Beppo was making at his horse.

Anxiously they strained their eyes for any sight of the beginning of San Salvatore.

Anxiously, they peered in the distance for any sign of the start of San Salvatore.

They had supposed and hoped that after a reasonable amount of village a mediaeval archway would loom upon them, and through it they would drive into a garden and draw up at an open, welcoming door, with light streaming from it and those servants standing in it who, according to the advertisement, remained.

They had imagined and hoped that after a decent stretch of the village, a medieval archway would appear before them, and they would drive through it into a garden, pulling up at a welcoming open door, with light spilling out and the servants standing there who, according to the ad, would still be present.

Instead the fly suddenly stopped.

Instead, the fly suddenly paused.

Peering out they could see they were still in the village street, with small dark houses each side; and Beppo, throwing the reins over the horse’s back as if completely confident this time that he would not go any farther, got down off his box. At the same moment, springing as it seemed out of nothing, a man and several half-grown boys appeared on each side of the fly and began dragging out the suit-cases.

Peering out, they realized they were still on the village street, with small dark houses on either side. Beppo, tossing the reins over the horse’s back as if fully confident this time that it wouldn't go any further, got down from his box. At that moment, as if appearing out of nowhere, a man and several teenage boys showed up on each side of the carriage and started pulling out the suitcases.

“No, no—San Salvatore, San Salvatore”—exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins, trying to hold on to what suit-cases she could.

“No, no—San Salvatore, San Salvatore,” Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed, struggling to keep hold of as many suitcases as she could.

Sì, sì—San Salvatore,” they all shouted, pulling.

Yes, yes—San Salvatore,” they all shouted, pulling.

“This can’t be San Salvatore,” said Mrs. Wilkins, turning to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who sat quite still watching her suit-cases being taken from her with the same patience she applied to lesser evils. She knew she could do nothing if these men were wicked men determined to have her suit-cases.

“This can’t be San Salvatore,” Mrs. Wilkins said, turning to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who sat still, watching her suitcases being taken away with the same patience she reserved for lesser annoyances. She knew there was nothing she could do if these men were dishonest and set on getting her suitcases.

“I don’t think it can be,” she admitted, and could not refrain from a moment’s wonder at the ways of God. Had she really been brought here, she and poor Mrs. Wilkins, after so much trouble in arranging it, so much difficulty and worry, along such devious paths of prevarication and deceit, only to be—

“I don’t think it can be,” she admitted, and couldn’t help but feel a moment of wonder at the ways of God. Had she truly been brought here, she and poor Mrs. Wilkins, after all the trouble in setting it up, all the difficulty and worry, along such complicated paths of lies and deceit, only to be—

She checked her thoughts, and gently said to Mrs. Wilkins, while the ragged youths disappeared with the suit-cases into the night and the man with the lantern helped Beppo pull the rug off her, that they were both in God’s hands; and for the first time on hearing this, Mrs. Wilkins was afraid.

She paused to gather her thoughts and softly said to Mrs. Wilkins, as the scruffy young men vanished into the night with the suitcases and the man with the lantern assisted Beppo in getting the rug off her, that they were both in God's hands; and for the first time upon hearing this, Mrs. Wilkins felt afraid.

There was nothing for it but to get out. Useless to try to go on sitting in the fly repeating San Salvatore. Every time they said it, and their voices each time were fainter, Beppo and the other man merely echoed it in a series of loud shouts. If only they had learned Italian when they were little. If only they could have said, “We wish to be driven to the door.” But they did not even know what door was in Italian. Such ignorance was not only contemptible, it was, they now saw, definitely dangerous. Useless, however, to lament it now. Useless to put off whatever it was that was going to happen to them by trying to go on sitting in the fly. They therefore got out.

There was no choice but to get out. It was pointless to keep sitting in the cab saying San Salvatore over and over. Each time they said it, their voices grew fainter, while Beppo and the other guy just shouted it back at them loudly. If only they'd learned Italian as kids. If only they could say, “We want to be taken to the door.” But they didn’t even know how to say door in Italian. This ignorance was not only shameful; they realized it was definitely dangerous. It was pointless to regret it now. It was pointless to delay whatever was going to happen to them by trying to keep sitting in the cab. So, they got out.

The two men opened their umbrellas for them and handed them to them. From this they received a faint encouragement, because they could not believe that if these men were wicked they would pause to open umbrellas. The man with the lantern then made signs to them to follow him, talking loud and quickly, and Beppo, they noticed, remained behind. Ought they to pay him? Not, they thought, if they were going to be robbed and perhaps murdered. Surely on such an occasion one did not pay. Besides, he had not after all brought them to San Salvatore. Where they had got to was evidently somewhere else. Also, he did not show the least wish to be paid; he let them go away into the night with no clamour at all. This, they could not help thinking, was a bad sign. He asked for nothing because presently he was to get so much.

The two men opened their umbrellas for them and handed them over. This gave them a slight sense of reassurance because they couldn't believe that if these men were up to no good, they would take the time to open umbrellas. The man with the lantern then gestured for them to follow him, speaking loudly and quickly, and they noticed that Beppo stayed behind. Should they pay him? They thought not, especially if they were about to be robbed and possibly killed. Surely, on a night like this, paying someone was out of the question. Besides, he hadn’t actually brought them to San Salvatore; where they were now was clearly somewhere else. Also, he showed no desire to be paid; he allowed them to walk away into the night without any fuss. This made them think it was a bad sign. He asked for nothing because he expected to get a lot later.

They came to some steps. The road ended abruptly in a church and some descending steps. The man held the lantern low for them to see the steps.

They reached some stairs. The road ended suddenly at a church and some steps going down. The man kept the lantern low so they could see the steps.

“San Salvatore?” said Mrs. Wilkins once again, very faintly, before committing herself to the steps. It was useless to mention it now, of course, but she could not go down steps in complete silence. No mediaeval castle, she was sure, was ever built at the bottom of steps.

“San Salvatore?” Mrs. Wilkins whispered again, hesitating before she took the first step down. Bringing it up now was pointless, but she couldn’t go downstairs in total silence. She was certain no medieval castle was ever built at the bottom of a flight of stairs.

Again, however, came the echoing shout—“Sì, sì—San Salvatore.”

Again, however, came the echoing shout—“Yes, yes—San Salvatore.”

They descended gingerly, holding up their skirts just as if they would be wanting them another time and had not in all probability finished with skirts for ever.

They carefully came down, lifting their skirts as if they might need them again someday and probably hadn't finished with skirts for good.

The steps ended in a steeply sloping path with flat stone slabs down the middle. They slipped a good deal on these wet slabs, and the man with the lantern, talking loud and quickly, held them up. His way of holding them up was polite.

The steps led to a steep path with flat stone slabs down the center. They slipped quite a bit on the wet slabs, and the man with the lantern, speaking loudly and quickly, helped them out. His way of helping was courteous.

“Perhaps,” said Mrs. Wilkins in a low voice to Mrs. Arbuthnot, “It is all right after all.”

“Maybe,” Mrs. Wilkins said quietly to Mrs. Arbuthnot, “It’s all okay after all.”

“We’re in God’s hands,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot again; and again Mrs. Wilkins was afraid.

“We’re in God’s hands,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said again; and once more, Mrs. Wilkins felt afraid.

They reached the bottom of the sloping path, and the light of the lantern flickered over an open space with houses round three sides. The sea was the fourth side, lazily washing backwards and forwards on pebbles.

They arrived at the bottom of the sloped path, and the lantern's light flickered over a clearing surrounded by houses on three sides. The sea made up the fourth side, gently ebbing and flowing over the pebbles.

“San Salvatore,” said the man pointing with his lantern to a black mass curved round the water like an arm flung about it.

“San Salvatore,” the man said, pointing with his lantern at a dark shape curved around the water like an arm wrapped around it.

They strained their eyes. They saw the black mass, and on the top of it a light.

They squinted their eyes. They saw the dark shape, and on top of it was a light.

“San Salvatore?” they both repeated incredulously, for where were the suit-cases, and why had they been forced to get out of the fly?

“San Salvatore?” they both echoed in disbelief, because where were the suitcases, and why had they been made to get out of the taxi?

Sì, sì—San Salvatore.”

Yes, yes—San Salvatore.”

They went along what seemed to be a quay, right on the edge of the water. There was not even a low wall here—nothing to prevent the man with the lantern tipping them in if he wanted to. He did not, however, tip them in. Perhaps it was all right after all, Mrs. Wilkins again suggested to Mrs. Arbuthnot on noticing this, who this time was herself beginning to think that it might be, and said no more about God’s hands.

They walked along what looked like a dock, right at the water's edge. There wasn't even a low wall—nothing to stop the man with the lantern from pushing them in if he wanted to. However, he didn’t push them in. Maybe it was okay after all, Mrs. Wilkins suggested to Mrs. Arbuthnot, noticing this. This time, Mrs. Arbuthnot was starting to think it might be fine too and said nothing more about God’s hands.

The flicker of the lantern danced along, reflected in the wet pavement of the quay. Out to the left, in the darkness and evidently at the end of a jetty, was a red light. They came to an archway with a heavy iron gate. The man with the lantern pushed the gate open. This time they went up steps instead of down, and at the top of them was a little path that wound upwards among flowers. They could not see the flowers, but the whole place was evidently full of them.

The flicker of the lantern danced along, reflecting on the wet pavement of the quay. To the left, in the darkness and clearly at the end of a jetty, was a red light. They reached an archway with a heavy iron gate. The man with the lantern pushed the gate open. This time they went up steps instead of down, and at the top was a small path that wound upwards among flowers. They couldn't see the flowers, but the whole area was clearly filled with them.

It here dawned on Mrs. Wilkins that perhaps the reason why the fly had not driven them up to the door was that there was no road, only a footpath. That also would explain the disappearance of the suit-cases. She began to feel confident that they would find their suit-cases waiting for them when they got up to the top. San Salvatore was, it seemed, on the top of a hill, as a mediaeval castle should be. At a turn of the path they saw above them, much nearer now and shining more brightly, the light they had seen from the quay. She told Mrs. Arbuthnot of her dawning belief, and Mrs. Arbuthnot agreed that it was very likely a true one.

Mrs. Wilkins suddenly realized that the reason the fly hadn’t taken them right to the door might be that there was no road, just a footpath. This would also explain where the suitcases had gone. She started to feel confident they would find their suitcases waiting for them when they reached the top. It seemed that San Salvatore was on top of a hill, just like a medieval castle should be. As they rounded a bend in the path, they saw the light they had noticed from the quay, now much closer and shining more brightly above them. She shared her growing belief with Mrs. Arbuthnot, who agreed that it was very likely true.

Once more, but this time in a tone of real hopefulness, Mrs. Wilkins said, pointing upwards at the black outline against the only slightly less black sky, “San Salvatore?” And once more, but this time comfortingly, encouragingly, came back the assurance, “Sì, sì—San Salvatore.”

Once again, but this time with genuine hopefulness, Mrs. Wilkins said, pointing up at the dark shape against the slightly less dark sky, “San Salvatore?” And once again, but this time in a comforting, encouraging way, came the reassuring response, “Sì, sì—San Salvatore.”

They crossed a little bridge, over what was apparently a ravine, and then came a flat bit with long grass at the sides and more flowers. They felt the grass flicking wet against their stockings, and the invisible flowers were everywhere. Then up again through trees, along a zigzag path with the smell all the way of the flowers they could not see. The warm rain was bringing out all the sweetness. Higher and higher they went in this sweet darkness, and the red light on the jetty dropped farther and farther below them.

They crossed a small bridge over what looked like a ravine, and then came to a flat area with tall grass on the sides and more flowers. They felt the wet grass brushing against their stockings, and the unseen flowers were everywhere. Then they went back up through the trees, following a winding path filled with the scent of flowers they couldn't see. The warm rain brought out all the sweetness. Higher and higher they climbed in this fragrant darkness, and the red light on the dock fell farther and farther beneath them.

The path wound round to the other side of what appeared to be a little peninsula; the jetty and the red light disappeared; across the emptiness on their left were distant lights.

The path curved around to the other side of what seemed to be a small peninsula; the dock and the red light faded away; across the openness on their left, there were distant lights.

“Mezzago,” said the man, waving his lantern at the lights.

“Mezzago,” said the man, waving his lantern at the lights.

Sì, sì,” they answered, for they had by now learned “sì, sì”. Upon which the man congratulated them in a great flow of polite words, not one of which they understood, on their magnificent Italian; for this was Domenico, the vigilant and accomplished gardener of San Salvatore, the prop and stay of the establishment, the resourceful, the gifted, the eloquent, the courteous, the intelligent Domenico. Only they did not know that yet; and he did in the dark, and even sometimes in the light, look, with his knife-sharp swarthy features and swift, panther movements, very like somebody wicked.

Yes, yes,” they replied, since they had now picked up “yes, yes”. Then the man praised them with an overflow of polite words, none of which they understood, for he was Domenico, the attentive and skilled gardener of San Salvatore, the support of the establishment, the resourceful, the talented, the articulate, the courteous, the clever Domenico. They just didn't know that yet; and in the shadows, and even sometimes in the light, he appeared, with his sharply defined, dark features and quick, feline movements, very much like someone up to no good.

They passed along another flat bit of path, with a black shape like a high wall towering above them on their right, and then the path went up again under trellises, and trailing sprays of scented things caught at them and shook raindrops on them, and the light of the lantern flickered over lilies, and then came a flight of ancient steps worn with centuries, and then another iron gate, and then they were inside, though still climbing a twisting flight of stone steps with old walls on either side like the walls of dungeons, and with a vaulted roof.

They moved along another flat stretch of path, with a dark shape like a tall wall looming above them on their right. Then the path rose again under trellises, and fragrant vines brushed against them, shaking off raindrops. The lantern light flickered over lilies, leading to a flight of ancient steps worn down over centuries, followed by another iron gate. They had entered, but were still climbing a winding stone staircase, flanked by old walls resembling dungeon walls, all beneath a vaulted ceiling.

At the top was a wrought-iron door, and through it shone a flood of electric light.

At the top was a wrought-iron door, and through it streamed a flood of electric light.

Ecco,” said Domenico, lithely running up the last few steps ahead and pushing the door open.

Here it is,” said Domenico, nimbly jogging up the last few steps and swinging the door open.

And there they were, arrived; and it was San Salvatore; and their suit-cases were waiting for them; and they had not been murdered.

And there they were, arriving; and it was San Salvatore; and their suitcases were waiting for them; and they hadn’t been killed.

They looked at each other’s white faces and blinking eyes very solemnly.

They stared at each other's pale faces and blinking eyes with a serious look.

It was a great, a wonderful moment. Here they were, in their mediaeval castle at last. Their feet touched its stones.

It was an amazing, incredible moment. Here they were, in their medieval castle at last. Their feet met the stones.

Mrs. Wilkins put her arm round Mrs. Arbuthnot’s neck and kissed her.

Mrs. Wilkins wrapped her arm around Mrs. Arbuthnot's neck and kissed her.

“The first thing to happen in this house,” she said softly, solemnly, “shall be a kiss.”

“The first thing that happens in this house,” she said gently, seriously, “will be a kiss.”

“Dear Lotty,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Hey Lotty,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Dear Rose,” said Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes brimming with gladness.

“Dear Rose,” said Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes shining with happiness.

Domenico was delighted. He liked to see beautiful ladies kiss. He made them a most appreciative speech of welcome, and they stood arm in arm, holding each other up, for they were very tired, blinking smilingly at him, and not understanding a word.

Domenico was thrilled. He enjoyed watching beautiful women kiss. He gave them a heartfelt welcome speech, and they stood arm in arm, supporting each other, as they were very tired, smiling and blinking at him, clueless about what he was saying.

Chapter 6

When Mrs. Wilkins woke next morning she lay in bed a few minutes before getting up and opening the shutters. What would she see out of her window? A shining world, or a world of rain? But it would be beautiful; whatever it was would be beautiful.

When Mrs. Wilkins woke up the next morning, she stayed in bed for a few minutes before getting up to open the shutters. What would she see outside her window? A bright, sunny world or one covered in rain? Either way, it would be beautiful; no matter what it was, it would be beautiful.

She was in a little bedroom with bare white walls and a stone floor and sparse old furniture. The beds—there were two—were made of iron, enamelled black and painted with bunches of gay flowers. She lay putting off the great moment of going to the window as one puts off opening a precious letter, gloating over it. She had no idea what time it was; she had forgotten to wind up her watch ever since, centuries ago, she last went to bed in Hampstead. No sounds were to be heard in the house, so she supposed it was very early, yet she felt as if she had slept a long while—so completely rested, so perfectly content. She lay with her arms clasped round her head thinking how happy she was, her lips curved upwards in a delighted smile. In bed by herself: adorable condition. She had not been in a bed without Mellersh once now for five whole years; and the cool roominess of it, the freedom of one’s movements, the sense of recklessness, of audacity, in giving the blankets a pull if one wanted to, or twitching the pillows more comfortably! It was like the discovery of an entirely new joy.

She was in a small bedroom with plain white walls and a stone floor, furnished with minimal, old furniture. There were two iron beds, painted black and decorated with bright flower patterns. She lay there, delaying the moment of going to the window like someone hesitating to open a treasured letter, savoring the anticipation. She had no idea what time it was; she had forgotten to wind her watch ever since she last went to bed in Hampstead ages ago. The house was completely silent, leading her to assume it was very early, yet she felt like she had slept for a long time—so completely rested, so perfectly content. She lay with her arms wrapped around her head, thinking about how happy she was, her lips curving into a joyful smile. Being in bed by herself: what a delightful experience. It had been five whole years since she had slept in a bed without Mellersh, and the spaciousness of it, the freedom to move, the sense of daring in adjusting the blankets or rearranging the pillows to her liking felt like discovering a whole new source of joy.

Mrs. Wilkins longed to get up and open the shutters, but where she was was really so very delicious. She gave a sigh of contentment, and went on lying there looking round her, taking in everything in her room, her own little room, her very own to arrange just as she pleased for this one blessed month, her room bought with her own savings, the fruit of her careful denials, whose door she could bolt if she wanted to, and nobody had the right to come in. It was such a strange little room, so different from any she had known, and so sweet. It was like a cell. Except for the two beds, it suggested a happy austerity. “And the name of the chamber,” she thought, quoting and smiling round at it, “was Peace.”

Mrs. Wilkins wanted to get up and open the shutters, but being where she was felt so incredibly nice. She sighed with contentment and kept lying there, taking in everything in her room—her own little space, completely hers to arrange however she liked for this one precious month. It was a room she had purchased with her own savings, the result of her careful sacrifices, with a door she could lock if she wanted, and nobody had the right to come in. It was such a unique little room, so different from any she had known, and so charming. It felt like a cell. Aside from the two beds, it had a happy simplicity about it. "And the name of the room," she thought, quoting and smiling at it, "was Peace."

Well, this was delicious, to lie there thinking how happy she was, but outside those shutters it was more delicious still. She jumped up, pulled on her slippers, for there was nothing on the stone floor but one small rug, ran to the window and threw open the shutters.

Well, this was delicious, lying there thinking about how happy she was, but outside those shutters, it was even better. She jumped up, put on her slippers, since there was only a small rug on the stone floor, ran to the window, and threw open the shutters.

Oh!” cried Mrs. Wilkins.

Oh!” exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins.

All the radiance of April in Italy lay gathered together at her feet. The sun poured in on her. The sea lay asleep in it, hardly stirring. Across the bay the lovely mountains, exquisitely different in colour, were asleep too in the light; and underneath her window, at the bottom of the flower-starred grass slope from which the wall of the castle rose up, was a great cypress, cutting through the delicate blues and violets and rose-colours of the mountains and the sea like a great black sword.

All the brightness of April in Italy was gathered at her feet. The sun flooded over her. The sea was calm, barely moving. Across the bay, the beautiful mountains, each a different shade, also rested in the light; and below her window, at the base of the flower-covered grassy slope that rose to the castle wall, stood a tall cypress, slicing through the soft blues, purples, and pinks of the mountains and the sea like a massive black sword.

She stared. Such beauty; and she there to see it. Such beauty; and she alive to feel it. Her face was bathed in light. Lovely scents came up to the window and caressed her. A tiny breeze gently lifted her hair. Far out in the bay a cluster of almost motionless fishing boats hovered like a flock of white birds on the tranquil sea. How beautiful, how beautiful. Not to have died before this . . . to have been allowed to see, breathe, feel this. . . . She stared, her lips parted. Happy? Poor, ordinary, everyday word. But what could one say, how could one describe it? It was as though she could hardly stay inside herself, it was as though she were too small to hold so much of joy, it was as though she were washed through with light. And how astonishing to feel this sheer bliss, for here she was, not doing and not going to do a single unselfish thing, not going to do a thing she didn’t want to do. According to everybody she had ever come across she ought at least to have twinges. She had not one twinge. Something was wrong somewhere. Wonderful that at home she should have been so good, so terribly good, and merely felt tormented. Twinges of every sort had there been her portion; aches, hurts, discouragements, and she the whole time being steadily unselfish. Now she had taken off all her goodness and left it behind her like a heap of rain-sodden clothes, and she only felt joy. She was naked of goodness, and was rejoicing in being naked. She was stripped, and exulting. And there, away in the dim mugginess of Hampstead, was Mellersh being angry.

She stared. Such beauty; and she was here to see it. Such beauty; and she was alive to feel it. Her face was illuminated. Lovely scents wafted through the window and enveloped her. A gentle breeze lightly lifted her hair. Out in the bay, a group of almost motionless fishing boats floated like a flock of white birds on the calm sea. How beautiful, how beautiful. Not to have died before this... to have been allowed to see, breathe, feel this... She stared, her lips slightly parted. Happy? A poor, ordinary, everyday word. But what could one say, how could one describe it? It was as if she could hardly contain herself, as if she were too small to hold so much joy, as if she were filled with light. And how amazing to feel this pure bliss, for here she was, not doing and not going to do a single selfless thing, not going to do anything she didn’t want to do. By everyone she had ever met, she ought at least to have felt guilty. She felt not a single pang. Something was off somewhere. How wonderful that at home she had been so good, so incredibly good, and merely felt tortured. She had experienced every type of guilt there; pain, heartaches, discouragements, all while being genuinely selfless. Now she had shed all her goodness and left it behind like a pile of damp clothes, and all she felt was joy. She was stripped of goodness, and was celebrating being bare. She was exposed, and reveling in it. And there, far away in the dull humidity of Hampstead, was Mellersh being angry.

She tried to visualise Mellersh, she tried to see him having breakfast and thinking bitter things about her; and lo, Mellersh himself began to shimmer, became rose-colour, became delicate violet, became an enchanting blue, became formless, became iridescent. Actually Mellersh, after quivering a minute, was lost in light.

She tried to picture Mellersh, imagining him having breakfast and thinking negative thoughts about her; and suddenly, Mellersh himself started to shimmer, turning rose-colored, then soft violet, then a captivating blue, becoming formless and iridescent. In fact, Mellersh, after quivering for a moment, was lost in light.

Well,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, staring, as it were, after him. How extraordinary not to be able to visualise Mellersh; and she who used to know every feature, every expression of his by heart. She simply could not see him as he was. She could only see him resolved into beauty, melted into harmony with everything else. The familiar words of the General Thanksgiving came quite naturally into her mind, and she found herself blessing God for her creation, preservation, and all the blessings of this life, but above all for His inestimable Love; out loud; in a burst of acknowledgment. While Mellersh, at that moment angrily pulling on his boots before going out into the dripping streets, was indeed thinking bitter things about her.

Well,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, staring after him. How strange it was that she couldn’t picture Mellersh; she who used to know every detail of his face and every expression of his perfectly. She just couldn’t see him as he really was. All she could see was him transformed into beauty, blended into harmony with everything around her. The familiar words of the General Thanksgiving came easily to her mind, and she found herself thanking God for her creation, preservation, and all the blessings of this life, but especially for His immeasurable Love; out loud; in a moment of gratitude. Meanwhile, Mellersh, at that moment angrily pulling on his boots before heading out into the rainy streets, was indeed thinking bitter thoughts about her.

She began to dress, choosing clean white clothes in honour of the summer’s day, unpacking her suit-cases, tidying her adorable little room. She moved about with quick, purposeful steps, her long thin body held up straight, her small face, so much puckered at home with effort and fear, smoothed out. All she had been and done before this morning, all she had felt and worried about, was gone. Each of her worries behaved as the image of Mellersh had behaved, and dissolved into colour and light. And she noticed things she had not noticed for years—when she was doing her hair in front of the glass she noticed it, and thought, “Why, what pretty stuff.” For years she had forgotten she had such a thing as hair, plaiting it in the evening and unplaiting it in the morning with the same hurry and indifference with which she laced and unlaced her shoes. Now she suddenly saw it, and she twisted it round her fingers before the glass, and was glad it was so pretty. Mellersh couldn’t have seen it either, for he had never said a word about it. Well, when she got home she would draw his attention to it. “Mellersh,” she would say, “look at my hair. Aren’t you pleased you’ve got a wife with hair like curly honey?”

She started getting dressed, picking clean white clothes to honor the summer day, unpacking her suitcases and tidying up her adorable little room. She moved around with quick, purposeful steps, her tall, slender body held upright, her small face, once so scrunched with effort and fear, now relaxed. Everything she had been and done before this morning, all her feelings and worries, had disappeared. Each of her concerns vanished like the image of Mellersh had, dissolving into color and light. And she noticed things she hadn’t seen in years—while doing her hair in front of the mirror, she realized, “Wow, what pretty stuff.” For years, she had forgotten she had hair, braiding it in the evening and unbraiding it in the morning with the same rush and indifference with which she tied and untied her shoes. Now, she suddenly noticed it, twisting it around her fingers in front of the mirror, feeling glad it was so pretty. Mellersh couldn’t have seen it either, since he had never mentioned it. Well, when she got home, she would point it out to him. “Mellersh,” she would say, “look at my hair. Aren’t you happy you have a wife with hair like curly honey?”

She laughed. She had never said anything like that to Mellersh yet, and the idea of it amused her. But why had she not? Oh yes—she used to be afraid of him. Funny to be afraid of anybody; and especially of one’s husband, whom one saw in his more simplified moments, such as asleep, and not breathing properly through his nose.

She laughed. She had never said anything like that to Mellersh before, and the thought of it amused her. But why hadn’t she? Oh right—she used to be afraid of him. It’s funny to be afraid of anyone; especially of one’s husband, whom you see in his simpler moments, like when he’s asleep and not breathing properly through his nose.

When she was ready she opened her door to go across to see if Rose, who had been put the night before by a sleepy maidservant into a cell opposite, were awake. She would say good-morning to her, and then she would run down and stay with that cypress tree till breakfast was ready, and after breakfast she wouldn’t so much as look out of a window till she had helped Rose get everything ready for Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher. There was much to be done that day, settling in, arranging the rooms; she mustn’t leave Rose to do it alone. They would make it all so lovely for the two to come, have such an entrancing vision ready for them of little cells bright with flowers. She remembered she had wanted Lady Caroline not to come; fancy wanting to shut some one out of heaven because she thought she would be shy of her! And as though it mattered if she were, and as though she would be anything so self-conscious as shy. Besides, what a reason. She could not accuse herself of goodness over that. And she remembered she had wanted not to have Mrs. Fisher either, because she had seemed lofty. How funny of her. So funny to worry about such little things, making them important.

When she was ready, she opened her door to see if Rose, who a sleepy maid had put in a room across the hall the night before, was awake. She would say good morning to her, then run down and stay by that cypress tree until breakfast was ready. After breakfast, she wouldn't even look out the window until she had helped Rose get everything ready for Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher. They had a lot to do that day—settling in and arranging the rooms; she couldn’t leave Rose to do it all alone. They would make everything lovely for the two of them, creating a beautiful scene filled with flowers in their little rooms. She remembered wanting Lady Caroline not to come; how silly to think about keeping someone away from heaven just because she thought she might feel awkward around her! As if it mattered if she did, and as if Lady Caroline would really be self-conscious at all. Besides, what a ridiculous reason. She couldn't claim to be good for that. She also remembered not wanting Mrs. Fisher around because she seemed so high and mighty. How funny that was. It was so silly to worry about such small things, making them feel so important.

The bedrooms and two of the sitting-rooms at San Salvatore were on the top floor, and opened into a roomy hall with a wide glass window at the north end. San Salvatore was rich in small gardens in different parts and on different levels. The garden this window looked down on was made on the highest part of the walls, and could only be reached through the corresponding spacious hall on the floor below. When Mrs. Wilkins came out of her room this window stood wide open, and beyond it in the sun was a Judas tree in full flower. There was no sign of anybody, no sound of voices or feet. Tubs of arum lilies stood about on the stone floor, and on a table flamed a huge bunch of fierce nasturtiums. Spacious, flowery, silent, with the wide window at the end opening into the garden, and the Judas tree absurdly beautiful in the sunshine, it seemed to Mrs. Wilkins, arrested on her way across to Mrs. Arbuthnot, too good to be true. Was she really going to live in this for a whole month? Up to now she had had to take what beauty she could as she went along, snatching at little bits of it when she came across it—a patch of daisies on a fine day in a Hampstead field, a flash of sunset between two chimney pots. She had never been in definitely, completely beautiful places. She had never been even in a venerable house; and such a thing as a profusion of flowers in her rooms was unattainable to her. Sometimes in the spring she had bought six tulips at Shoolbred’s, unable to resist them, conscious that Mellersh if he knew what they had cost would think it inexcusable; but they had soon died, and then there were no more. As for the Judas tree, she hadn’t an idea what it was, and gazed at it out there against the sky with the rapt expression of one who sees a heavenly vision.

The bedrooms and two of the sitting rooms at San Salvatore were on the top floor, and they opened into a spacious hall with a large glass window at the north end. San Salvatore had plenty of small gardens in various areas and at different levels. The garden this window overlooked was located at the highest part of the walls and could only be accessed through the corresponding large hall on the floor below. When Mrs. Wilkins stepped out of her room, this window was wide open, and beyond it in the sunlight was a Judas tree in full bloom. There was no sign of anyone around, no sounds of voices or footsteps. Tubs of arum lilies were scattered on the stone floor, and on a table, a large bunch of vibrant nasturtiums caught the eye. Spacious, flowery, and silent, with the large window at the end leading into the garden and the Judas tree looking absurdly beautiful in the sunshine, it seemed to Mrs. Wilkins, halted on her way to Mrs. Arbuthnot, almost too perfect to be real. Was she really going to live in this for an entire month? Until now, she had only been able to grab bits of beauty as she encountered them—a patch of daisies on a sunny day in a Hampstead field, a flash of sunset between two chimney pots. She had never been in places that were truly, completely beautiful. She had never even visited a historic house; having an abundance of flowers in her rooms felt impossible to her. Sometimes in the spring, she would buy six tulips at Shoolbred’s, unable to resist, knowing that Mellersh would think it unreasonable if he found out how much they cost; but they quickly wilted, and that was the end of it. As for the Judas tree, she had no idea what it was and stared at it against the sky with the awe of someone witnessing a divine vision.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, coming out of her room, found her there like that, standing in the middle of the hall staring.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, coming out of her room, found her there like that, standing in the middle of the hall staring.

“Now what does she think she sees now?” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Now what does she think she sees now?” thought Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“We are in God’s hands,” said Mrs. Wilkins, turning to her, speaking with extreme conviction.

“We are in God's hands,” Mrs. Wilkins said, turning to her with deep conviction.

“Oh!” said Mrs. Arbuthnot quickly, her face, which had been covered with smiles when she came out of her room, falling. “Why, what has happened?”

“Oh!” said Mrs. Arbuthnot quickly, her face, which had been lit up with smiles when she came out of her room, dropping. “What’s wrong?”

For Mrs. Arbuthnot had woken up with such a delightful feeling of security, of relief, and she did not want to find she had not after all escaped from the need of refuge. She had not even dreamed of Frederick. For the first time for years she had been spared the nightly dream that he was with her, that they were heart to heart, and its miserable awakening. She had slept like a baby, and had woken up confident; she had found there was nothing she wished to say in her morning prayer except Thank you. It was disconcerting to be told she was after all in God’s hands.

For Mrs. Arbuthnot, waking up brought a wonderful sense of security and relief, and she didn’t want to discover that she hadn’t really escaped the need for refuge. She hadn’t even dreamed of Frederick. For the first time in years, she was free from the nightly dream where he was with her, where they were heart to heart, and the miserable feeling that came with waking up. She had slept like a baby and woke up feeling confident; she found that the only thing she wanted to say in her morning prayer was Thank you. It was unsettling to be reminded that she was, after all, in God’s hands.

“I hope nothing has happened?” she asked anxiously.

“I hope nothing's wrong?” she asked anxiously.

Mrs. Wilkins looked at her a moment, and laughed. “How funny,” she said, kissing her.

Mrs. Wilkins looked at her for a moment and laughed. “That’s so funny,” she said, giving her a kiss.

“What is funny?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, her face clearing because Mrs. Wilkins laughed.

“What’s funny?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, her expression brightening because Mrs. Wilkins laughed.

“We are. This is. Everything. It’s all so wonderful. It’s so funny and so adorable that we should be in it. I daresay when we finally reach heaven—the one they talk about so much—we shan’t find it a bit more beautiful.”

“We exist. This is real. Everything. It’s all so amazing. It’s so amusing and so cute that we should be a part of it. I believe when we finally get to heaven—the one everyone talks about so much—we won't find it any more beautiful.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot relaxed to smiling security again. “Isn’t it divine?” she said.

Mrs. Arbuthnot relaxed into a smile again. “Isn’t it amazing?” she said.

“Were you ever, ever in your life so happy?” asked Mrs. Wilkins, catching her by the arm.

“Have you ever, ever been this happy in your life?” asked Mrs. Wilkins, grabbing her by the arm.

“No,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. Nor had she been; not ever; not even in her first love-days with Frederick. Because always pain had been close at hand in that other happiness, ready to torture with doubts, to torture even with the very excess of her love; while this was the simple happiness of complete harmony with her surroundings, the happiness that asks for nothing, that just accepts, just breathes, just is.

“No,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. And she never had; not ever; not even in her first love days with Frederick. Because pain had always been right there alongside that other happiness, ready to torment her with doubts, to hurt her even with the sheer intensity of her love; while this was the straightforward happiness of being completely in sync with her surroundings, the kind of happiness that asks for nothing, that simply accepts, just breathes, just exists.

“Let’s go and look at that tree close,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “I don’t believe it can only be a tree.”

“Let’s go check out that tree up close,” Mrs. Wilkins said. “I really don’t think it’s just a tree.”

And arm in arm they went along the hall, and their husbands would not have known them their faces were so young with eagerness, and together they stood at the open window, and when their eyes, having feasted on the marvellous pink thing, wandered farther among the beauties of the garden, they saw sitting on the low wall at the east edge of it, gazing out over the bay, her feet in lilies, Lady Caroline.

And arm in arm, they walked down the hall, looking so youthful and eager that their husbands wouldn’t have recognized them. Together, they stood by the open window, and as their eyes soaked in the stunning pink flower, they looked further around the beautiful garden. There, sitting on the low wall at the east edge, gazing out over the bay with her feet among the lilies, was Lady Caroline.

They were astonished. They said nothing in their astonishment, but stood quite still, arm in arm, staring down at her.

They were amazed. They didn’t say anything in their shock, but stood completely still, arm in arm, staring down at her.

She too had on a white frock, and her head was bare. They had had no idea that day in London, when her hat was down to her nose and her furs were up to her ears, that she was so pretty. They had merely thought her different from the other women in the club, and so had the other women themselves, and so had all the waitresses, eyeing her sideways and eyeing her again as they passed the corner where she sat talking; but they had had no idea she was so pretty. She was exceedingly pretty. Everything about her was very much that which it was. Her fair hair was very fair, her lovely grey eyes were very lovely and grey, her dark eyelashes were very dark, her white skin was very white, her red mouth was very red. She was extravagantly slender—the merest thread of a girl, though not without little curves beneath her thin frock where little curves should be. She was looking out across the bay, and was sharply defined against the background of empty blue. She was full in the sun. Her feet dangled among the leaves and flowers of the lilies just as if it did not matter that they should be bent or bruised.

She also wore a white dress, and her head was bare. They had no idea that day in London, when her hat was pulled down to her nose and her furs were up to her ears, that she was so beautiful. They just thought she was different from the other women at the club, and so did the other women themselves, and so did all the waitresses, glancing at her sideways and looking back again as they passed the corner where she sat talking; but they had no idea she was so beautiful. She was incredibly pretty. Everything about her was exactly what it was. Her fair hair was very light, her lovely gray eyes were indeed lovely and gray, her dark eyelashes were very dark, her white skin was very pale, her red mouth was very red. She was extravagantly slender—a mere thread of a girl, though not without small curves beneath her thin dress where curves were meant to be. She was looking out across the bay, sharply defined against the backdrop of empty blue. She was fully in the sun. Her feet dangled among the leaves and flowers of the lilies as if it didn’t matter if they got bent or bruised.

“She ought to have a headache,” whispered Mrs. Arbuthnot at last, “sitting there in the sun like that.”

“She should have a headache,” whispered Mrs. Arbuthnot at last, “sitting there in the sun like that.”

“She ought to have a hat,” whispered Mrs. Wilkins.

“She should have a hat,” whispered Mrs. Wilkins.

“She’s treading on lilies.”

"She's stepping on flowers."

“But they’re hers as much as ours.”

“But they’re just as much hers as they are ours.”

“Only one-fourth of them.”

“Only one-quarter of them.”

Lady Caroline turned her head. She looked up at them a moment, surprised to see them so much younger than they had seemed that day at the club, and so much less unattractive. Indeed, they were really almost quite attractive, if any one could ever be really quite attractive in the wrong clothes. Her eyes, swiftly glancing over them, took in every inch of each of them in the half second before she smiled and waved her hand and called out Good-morning. There was nothing, she saw at once, to be hoped for in the way of interest from their clothes. She did not consciously think this, for she was having a violent reaction against beautiful clothes and the slavery they impose on one, her experience being that the instant one had got them they took one in hand and gave one no peace till they had been everywhere and been seen by everybody. You didn’t take your clothes to parties; they took you. It was quite a mistake to think that a woman, a really well-dressed woman, wore out her clothes; it was the clothes that wore out the woman—dragging her about at all hours of the day and night. No wonder men stayed young longer. Just new trousers couldn’t excite them. She couldn’t suppose that even the newest trousers ever behaved like that, taking the bit between their teeth. Her images were disorderly, but she thought as she chose, she used what images she liked. As she got off the wall and came towards the window, it seemed a restful thing to know she was going to spend an entire month with people in dresses made as she dimly remembered dresses used to be made five summers ago.

Lady Caroline turned her head. She looked up at them for a moment, surprised to see they were much younger than they'd seemed that day at the club, and way less unattractive. In fact, they were almost quite attractive, if anyone could be really attractive in the wrong clothes. Her eyes quickly scanned them, taking in every detail in the split second before she smiled, waved her hand, and called out, "Good morning." There was nothing, she realized immediately, to hope for in terms of interest from their clothes. She didn't consciously think this, as she was reacting strongly against beautiful clothes and the pressure they put on you. Her experience was that as soon as you had them, they took control and wouldn’t let you rest until you’d been everywhere and seen by everyone. You didn’t take your clothes to parties; they took you. It was completely wrong to think that a woman, a truly well-dressed woman, wore out her clothes; it was the clothes that wore out the woman—dragging her around at all hours of the day and night. No wonder men stayed young longer. Just new pants couldn't stir them. She couldn't imagine that even the newest pants ever acted like that, taking control. Her thoughts were scattered, but she thought as she pleased, using whatever images she wanted. As she stepped off the wall and walked toward the window, it felt comforting to know she was going to spend a whole month with people in dresses made like she vaguely remembered them being made five summers ago.

“I got here yesterday morning,” she said, looking up at them and smiling. She really was bewitching. She had everything, even a dimple.

“I arrived here yesterday morning,” she said, looking up at them and smiling. She was truly enchanting. She had it all, even a cute dimple.

“It’s a great pity,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling back, “because we were going to choose the nicest room for you.”

“It’s such a shame,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling back, “because we were going to pick the best room for you.”

“Oh, but I’ve done that,” said Lady Caroline. “At least, I think it’s the nicest. It looks two ways—I adore a room that looks two ways, don’t you? Over the sea to the west, and over this Judas tree to the north.”

“Oh, but I’ve done that,” said Lady Caroline. “At least, I think it's the nicest. It has a view in both directions—I love a room that has two views, don’t you? One over the sea to the west, and one over this Judas tree to the north.”

“And we had meant to make it pretty for you with flowers,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“And we were planning to make it nice for you with flowers,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“Oh, Domenico did that. I told him to directly I got here. He’s the gardener. He’s wonderful.”

“Oh, Domenico did that. I told him to do it as soon as I got here. He’s the gardener. He’s amazing.”

“It’s a good thing, of course,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot a little hesitatingly, “to be independent, and to know exactly what one wants.”

“It’s definitely a good thing,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said a bit uncertainly, “to be independent and to know exactly what you want.”

“Yes, it saves trouble,” agreed Lady Caroline.

“Yes, it makes things easier,” agreed Lady Caroline.

“But one shouldn’t be so independent,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “as to leave no opportunity for other people to exercise their benevolences on one.”

“But you shouldn't be so independent,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “that you leave no chance for others to show their kindness towards you.”

Lady Caroline, who had been looking at Mrs. Arbuthnot, now looked at Mrs. Wilkins. That day at that queer club she had had merely a blurred impression of Mrs. Wilkins, for it was the other one who did all the talking, and her impression had been of somebody so shy, so awkward that it was best to take no notice of her. She had not even been able to say good-bye properly, doing it in an agony, turning red, turning damp. Therefore she now looked at her in some surprise; and she was still more surprised when Mrs. Wilkins added, gazing at her with the most obvious sincere admiration, speaking indeed with a conviction that refused to remain unuttered, “I didn’t realise you were so pretty.”

Lady Caroline, who had been watching Mrs. Arbuthnot, now turned her attention to Mrs. Wilkins. That day at that odd club, she had only a vague impression of Mrs. Wilkins, since the other woman did all the talking, and she thought Mrs. Wilkins seemed so shy and awkward that it was better to ignore her. She hadn’t even been able to say goodbye properly, stumbling through it, turning red and sweaty. So now, she looked at her with some surprise; and she was even more taken aback when Mrs. Wilkins added, gazing at her with the clearest sincere admiration, speaking with a conviction that couldn’t be held back, “I didn’t realize you were so pretty.”

She stared at Mrs. Wilkins. She was not usually told this quite so immediately and roundly. Abundantly as she was used to it—impossible not to be after twenty-eight solid years—it surprised her to be told it with such bluntness, and by a woman.

She looked at Mrs. Wilkins. She wasn’t usually told this so directly and harshly. Even though she had grown accustomed to it—there was no way not to after twenty-eight solid years—it shocked her to hear it expressed so straightforwardly, and by a woman.

“It’s very kind of you to think so,” she said.

“It’s really nice of you to say that,” she said.

“Why, you’re lovely,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “Quite, quite lovely.”

“Wow, you look amazing,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “Really, just amazing.”

“I hope,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot pleasantly, “you make the most of it.”

“I hope,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot cheerfully, “you take full advantage of it.”

Lady Caroline then stared at Mrs. Arbuthnot. “Oh yes,” she said. “I make the most of it. I’ve been doing that ever since I can remember.”

Lady Caroline then stared at Mrs. Arbuthnot. “Oh yes,” she said. “I take full advantage of it. I’ve been doing that for as long as I can remember.”

“Because,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling and raising a warning forefinger, “it won’t last.”

“Because,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said, smiling and raising a cautionary finger, “it won't last.”

Then Lady Caroline began to be afraid these two were originals. If so, she would be bored. Nothing bored her so much as people who insisted on being original, who came and buttonholed her and kept her waiting while they were being original. And the one who admired her—it would be tiresome if she dogged her about in order to look at her. What she wanted of this holiday was complete escape from all she had had before, she wanted the rest of complete contrast. Being admired, being dogged, wasn’t contrast, it was repetition; and as for originals, to find herself shut up with two on the top of a precipitous hill in a mediaeval castle built for the express purpose of preventing easy goings out and in, would not, she was afraid, be especially restful. Perhaps she had better be a little less encouraging. They had seemed such timid creatures, even the dark one—she couldn’t remember their names—that day at the club, that she had felt it quite safe to be very friendly. Here they had come out of their shells; already; indeed, at once. There was no sign of timidity about either of them here. If they had got out of their shells so immediately, at the very first contact, unless she checked them they would soon begin to press upon her, and then good-bye to her dream of thirty restful, silent days, lying unmolested in the sun, getting her feathers smooth again, not being spoken to, not waited on, not grabbed at and monopolised, but just recovering from the fatigue, the deep and melancholy fatigue, of the too much.

Then Lady Caroline started to worry that these two were unique characters. If that was the case, she would be bored. Nothing bored her more than people who insisted on being unique, who approached her and kept her waiting while they showcased their originality. The one who admired her—she found it tedious if someone followed her around just to look at her. What she wanted from this holiday was a complete escape from everything she had dealt with before; she craved a stark contrast. Being admired and having someone tag along weren’t contrasts, they were just repetitions; and as for unique characters, finding herself stuck with two of them at the top of a steep hill in a medieval castle designed to make coming in and out difficult wouldn't, she feared, be very relaxing. Maybe she should be a little less encouraging. They had seemed like such shy individuals, even the dark one—she couldn’t recall their names—from that day at the club, that she felt it was safe to be very friendly. Now they had come out of their shells; already, indeed, right away. There was no sign of shyness from either of them here. If they had emerged from their shells so quickly, right from the first interaction, unless she reined them in, they would soon start to encroach on her, and then goodbye to her dream of thirty peaceful, silent days, lying undisturbed in the sun, smoothing her ruffled feathers, not being talked to, not being attended to, not being grabbed at and monopolized, but simply recovering from the tiredness, the deep and melancholic tiredness, of having too much.

Besides, there was Mrs. Fisher. She too must be checked. Lady Caroline had started two days earlier than had been arranged for two reasons: first, because she wished to arrive before the others in order to pick out the room or rooms she preferred, and second, because she judged it likely that otherwise she would have to travel with Mrs. Fisher. She did not want to travel with Mrs. Fisher. She did not want to arrive with Mrs. Fisher. She saw no reason whatever why for a single moment she should have to have anything at all to do with Mrs. Fisher.

Besides, there was Mrs. Fisher. She also needed to be checked. Lady Caroline had left two days earlier than planned for two reasons: first, because she wanted to get there before the others to choose her preferred room or rooms, and second, because she thought it was likely she would end up traveling with Mrs. Fisher otherwise. She didn’t want to travel with Mrs. Fisher. She didn’t want to arrive with Mrs. Fisher. She saw no reason at all why she should have to deal with Mrs. Fisher in any way.

But unfortunately Mrs. Fisher also was filled with a desire to get to San Salvatore first and pick out the room or rooms she preferred, and she and Lady Caroline had after all travelled together. As early as Calais they began to suspect it; in Paris they feared it; at Modane they knew it; at Mezzago they concealed it, driving out to Castagneto in two separate flys, the nose of the one almost touching the back of the other the whole way. But when the road suddenly left off at the church and the steps, further evasion was impossible; and faced by this abrupt and difficult finish to their journey there was nothing for it but to amalgamate.

But unfortunately, Mrs. Fisher was also eager to get to San Salvatore first and choose the room or rooms she liked best, and she and Lady Caroline had, after all, traveled together. As early as Calais, they started to suspect it; in Paris, they feared it; at Modane, they knew it; at Mezzago, they hid it. They drove out to Castagneto in two separate carriages, the front of one almost touching the back of the other the whole way. But when the road abruptly ended at the church and the steps, further evasion was impossible; faced with this sudden and difficult end to their journey, they had no choice but to combine forces.

Because of Mrs. Fisher’s stick Lady Caroline had to see about everything. Mrs. Fisher’s intentions, she explained from her fly when the situation had become plain to her, were active, but her stick prevented their being carried out. The two drivers told Lady Caroline boys would have to carry the luggage up to the castle, and she went in search of some, while Mrs. Fisher waited in the fly because of her stick. Mrs. Fisher could speak Italian, but only, she explained, the Italian of Dante, which Matthew Arnold used to read with her when she was a girl, and she thought this might be above the heads of boys. Therefore Lady Caroline, who spoke ordinary Italian very well, was obviously the one to go and do things.

Because of Mrs. Fisher’s cane, Lady Caroline had to handle everything. Mrs. Fisher explained from her carriage, once she understood the situation, that her intentions were strong, but her cane stopped her from acting on them. The two drivers told Lady Caroline that the boys would need to carry the luggage up to the castle, so she went to find some, while Mrs. Fisher stayed in the carriage because of her cane. Mrs. Fisher could speak Italian, but only, as she mentioned, the Italian of Dante, which Matthew Arnold used to read with her when she was younger, and she thought this might be too complicated for the boys. So, Lady Caroline, who spoke regular Italian very well, was clearly the one to step up and take care of things.

“I am in your hands,” said Mrs. Fisher, sitting firmly in her fly. “You must please regard me as merely an old woman with a stick.”

“I’m in your hands,” said Mrs. Fisher, sitting firmly in her carriage. “You should see me as just an old woman with a cane.”

And presently, down the steps and cobbles to the piazza, and along the quay, and up the zigzag path, Lady Caroline found herself as much obliged to walk slowly with Mrs. Fisher as if she were her own grandmother.

And soon, down the steps and cobblestones to the plaza, along the dock, and up the winding path, Lady Caroline felt just as obligated to walk slowly with Mrs. Fisher as if she were her own grandmother.

“It’s my stick,” Mrs. Fisher complacently remarked at intervals.

“It’s my stick,” Mrs. Fisher said contentedly from time to time.

And when they rested at those bends of the zigzag path where seats were, and Lady Caroline, who would have liked to run on and get to the top quickly, was forced in common humanity to remain with Mrs. Fisher because of her stick, Mrs. Fisher told her how she had been on a zigzag path once with Tennyson.

And when they paused at the spots along the winding path where the benches were, Lady Caroline, who wanted to dash ahead and reach the top quickly, had to stay with Mrs. Fisher out of common decency because of her walking stick. Mrs. Fisher then recounted how she had once been on a winding path with Tennyson.

“Isn’t his cricket wonderful?” said Lady Caroline absently.

“Isn’t his cricket amazing?” Lady Caroline said absentmindedly.

The Tennyson,” said Mrs. Fisher, turning her head and observing her a moment over her spectacles.

The Tennyson,” Mrs. Fisher said, turning her head to look at her for a moment over her glasses.

“Isn’t he?” said Lady Caroline.

“Isn’t he?” Lady Caroline asked.

“I am speaking,” said Mrs. Fisher, “of Alfred.”

“I’m talking about Alfred,” Mrs. Fisher said.

“Oh,” said Lady Caroline.

“Oh,” said Lady Caroline.

“And it was a path, too,” Mrs. Fisher went on severely, “curiously like this. No eucalyptus tree, of course, but otherwise curiously like this. And at one of the bends he turned and said to me—I see him now turning and saying to me—”

“And it was a path, too,” Mrs. Fisher continued firmly, “strangely similar to this. No eucalyptus tree, of course, but otherwise strangely similar to this. And at one of the curves, he turned and said to me—I can picture him now turning and saying to me—”

Yes, Mrs. Fisher would have to be checked. And so would these two up at the window. She had better begin at once. She was sorry she had got off the wall. All she need have done was to have waved her hand, and waited till they came down and out into the garden to her.

Yes, Mrs. Fisher would need to be checked on. And so would the two at the window. She should start right away. She regretted getting off the wall. All she had to do was wave her hand and wait for them to come down and join her in the garden.

So she ignored Mrs. Arbuthnot’s remark and raised forefinger, and said with marked coldness—at least, she tried to make it sound marked—that she supposed they would be going to breakfast, and that she had had hers; but it was her fate that however coldly she sent forth her words they came out sounding quite warm and agreeable. That was because she had a sympathetic and delightful voice, due entirely to some special formation of her throat and the roof of her mouth, and having nothing whatever to do with what she was feeling. Nobody in consequence ever believed they were being snubbed. It was most tiresome. And if she stared icily it did not look icy at all, because her eyes, lovely to begin with, had the added loveliness of very long, soft, dark eyelashes. No icy stare could come out of eyes like that; it got caught and lost in the soft eyelashes, and the persons stared at merely thought they were being regarded with a flattering and exquisite attentiveness. And if ever she was out of humour or definitely cross—and who would not be sometimes in such a world?—she only looked so pathetic that people all rushed to comfort her, if possible by means of kissing. It was more than tiresome, it was maddening. Nature was determined that she should look and sound angelic. She could never be disagreeable or rude without being completely misunderstood.

So she brushed off Mrs. Arbuthnot’s comment and raised her finger, trying to sound cold—she really wanted it to come off that way—saying she assumed they’d be going to breakfast and that she had already eaten. However, no matter how chilling her words were meant to be, they ended up sounding warm and pleasant. That was because she had a sympathetic and lovely voice, due entirely to the shape of her throat and the roof of her mouth, and nothing to do with her feelings. As a result, no one ever believed they were being snubbed. It was incredibly annoying. Even when she looked icy, it didn’t come off that way, because her eyes, already beautiful, had the added charm of long, soft, dark eyelashes. No icy glare could come from eyes like that; it got caught in the soft lashes, and the people she looked at just thought they were being given a flattering and exquisite attention. And if she was ever in a bad mood or genuinely upset—and who wouldn’t be sometimes in this world?—she only appeared so pitiful that everyone rushed to comfort her, often with kisses. It was more than annoying; it was infuriating. Nature had made sure she looked and sounded angelic. She could never be disagreeable or rude without being completely misinterpreted.

“I had my breakfast in my room,” she said, trying her utmost to sound curt. “Perhaps I’ll see you later.”

“I had my breakfast in my room,” she said, doing her best to sound blunt. “Maybe I’ll see you later.”

And she nodded, and went back to where she had been sitting on the wall, with the lilies being nice and cool round her feet.

And she nodded and returned to where she had been sitting on the wall, with the lilies cool and pleasant around her feet.

Chapter 7

Their eyes followed her admiringly. They had no idea they had been snubbed. It was a disappointment, of course, to find she had forestalled them and that they were not to have the happiness of preparing for her, of watching her face when she arrived and first saw everything, but there was still Mrs. Fisher. They would concentrate on Mrs. Fisher, and would watch her face instead; only, like everybody else, they would have preferred to watch Lady Caroline’s.

Their eyes followed her with admiration. They had no idea they had been overlooked. It was a letdown, of course, to realize she had anticipated them and that they wouldn't get the joy of preparing for her, of seeing her expression when she arrived and first took in everything, but there was still Mrs. Fisher. They would focus on Mrs. Fisher and watch her face instead; still, like everyone else, they would have preferred to watch Lady Caroline’s.

Perhaps, then, as Lady Caroline had talked of breakfast, they had better begin by going and having it, for there was too much to be done that day to spend any more time gazing at the scenery—servants to be interviewed, the house to be gone through and examined, and finally Mrs. Fisher’s room to be got ready and adorned.

Perhaps, then, since Lady Caroline had mentioned breakfast, they should start by having it, because there was too much to do that day to waste any more time looking at the scenery—interviewing servants, going through and inspecting the house, and finally getting Mrs. Fisher’s room ready and decorated.

They waved their hands gaily at Lady Caroline, who seemed absorbed in what she saw and took no notice, and turning away found the maidservant of the night before had come up silently behind them in cloth slippers with string soles.

They waved their hands happily at Lady Caroline, who appeared lost in thought and didn't notice them. As they turned away, they realized the maidservant from the night before had quietly approached them, wearing soft slippers with string soles.

She was Francesca, the elderly parlour-maid, who had been with the owner, he had said, for years, and whose presence made inventories unnecessary; and after wishing them good-morning and hoping they had slept well, she told them breakfast was ready in the dining-room on the floor below, and if they would follow her she would lead.

She was Francesca, the older maid, who had been with the owner for years, as he had mentioned, and whose presence made inventories unnecessary. After wishing them good morning and hoping they had slept well, she told them that breakfast was ready in the dining room on the floor below, and if they would follow her, she would lead the way.

They did not understand a single word of the very many in which Francesca succeeded in clothing this simple information, but they followed her, for it at least was clear that they were to follow, and going down the stairs, and along the broad hall like the one above except for glass doors at the end instead of a window opening into the garden, they were shown into the dining-room; where, sitting at the head of the table having her breakfast, was Mrs. Fisher.

They didn't understand a single word of the many that Francesca used to explain this simple information, but they followed her since it was clear that they were meant to. Descending the stairs and walking down the wide hall, which was like the one above except for the glass doors at the end instead of a window leading to the garden, they were shown into the dining room, where Mrs. Fisher was sitting at the head of the table having her breakfast.

This time they exclaimed. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot exclaimed, though her exclamation was only “Oh.”

This time they shouted. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot shouted, although her shout was just “Oh.”

Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed at greater length. “Why, but it’s like having the bread taken out of one’s mouth!” exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins.

Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed more loudly, “Why, it’s like having the bread taken right out of your mouth!”

“How do you do,” said Mrs. Fisher. “I can’t get up because of my stick.” And she stretched out her hand across the table.

"How are you?" said Mrs. Fisher. "I can't stand up because of my cane." And she reached her hand across the table.

They advanced and shook it.

They moved forward and shook it.

“We had no idea you were here,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“We had no idea you were here,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Fisher, resuming her breakfast. “Yes. I am here.” And with composure she removed the top of her egg.

“Yes,” said Mrs. Fisher, going back to her breakfast. “Yes. I’m here.” And calmly, she took the top off her egg.

“It’s a great disappointment,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “We had meant to give you such a welcome.”

“It’s a huge disappointment,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “We had planned to give you such a welcome.”

This was the one, Mrs. Fisher remembered, briefly glancing at her, who when she came to Prince of Wales Terrace said she had seen Keats. She must be careful with this one—curb her from the beginning.

This was the one, Mrs. Fisher recalled, quickly looking at her, who when she arrived at Prince of Wales Terrace said she had seen Keats. She needed to be careful with this one—keep her in check from the start.

She therefore ignored Mrs. Wilkins and said gravely, with a downward face of impenetrable calm bent on her egg, “Yes. I arrived yesterday with Lady Caroline.”

She then ignored Mrs. Wilkins and said seriously, with a calm expression fixed on her egg, “Yes. I arrived yesterday with Lady Caroline.”

“It’s really dreadful,” said Mrs. Wilkins, exactly as if she had not been ignored. “There’s nobody left to get anything ready for now. I feel thwarted. I feel as if the bread had been taken out of my mouth just when I was going to be happy swallowing it.”

“It’s really awful,” said Mrs. Wilkins, as if she hadn’t been ignored. “There’s no one left to prepare anything now. I feel stuck. It’s like the bread was taken out of my mouth just when I was finally ready to enjoy it.”

“Where will you sit?” asked Mrs. Fisher of Mrs. Arbuthnot—markedly of Mrs. Arbuthnot; the comparison with the bread seemed to her most unpleasant.

“Where will you sit?” Mrs. Fisher asked Mrs. Arbuthnot—clearly directing her question to Mrs. Arbuthnot; the comparison to the bread felt very uncomfortable to her.

“Oh, thank you—” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, sitting down rather suddenly next to her.

“Oh, thank you—” Mrs. Arbuthnot said, sitting down quite abruptly next to her.

There were only two places she could sit down in, the places laid on either side of Mrs. Fisher. She therefore sat down in one, and Mrs. Wilkins sat down opposite her in the other.

There were only two spots for her to sit, the ones on either side of Mrs. Fisher. So, she chose one, and Mrs. Wilkins took the seat opposite her in the other.

Mrs. Fisher was at the head of the table. Round her was grouped the coffee and the tea. Of course they were all sharing San Salvatore equally, but it was she herself and Lotty, Mrs. Arbuthnot mildly reflected, who had found it, who had had the work of getting it, who had chosen to admit Mrs. Fisher into it. Without them, she could not help thinking, Mrs. Fisher would not have been there. Morally Mrs. Fisher was a guest. There was no hostess in this party, but supposing there had been a hostess it would not have been Mrs. Fisher, nor Lady Caroline, it would have been either herself or Lotty. Mrs. Arbuthnot could not help feeling this as she sat down, and Mrs. Fisher, the hand which Ruskin had wrung suspended over the pots before her, inquired, “Tea or coffee?” She could not help feeling it even more definitely when Mrs. Fisher touched a small gong on the table beside her as though she had been used to that gong and that table ever since she was little, and, on Francesca’s appearing, bade her in the language of Dante bring more milk. There was a curious air about Mrs. Fisher, thought Mrs. Arbuthnot, of being in possession; and if she herself had not been so happy she would have perhaps minded.

Mrs. Fisher was sitting at the head of the table. Surrounding her were the coffee and tea. Of course, they were all sharing San Salvatore equally, but it was she and Lotty, Mrs. Arbuthnot thought mildly, who had discovered it, who had put in the effort to get it, and who had chosen to let Mrs. Fisher in on it. Without them, she couldn’t help but think, Mrs. Fisher wouldn’t have been there. Morally, Mrs. Fisher was a guest. There was no real hostess at this gathering, but if there had been, it wouldn’t have been Mrs. Fisher or Lady Caroline; it would have been either her or Lotty. Mrs. Arbuthnot couldn't shake this feeling as she sat down, and Mrs. Fisher, the hand that Ruskin had wrung now hovering over the pots in front of her, asked, “Tea or coffee?” She felt this even more strongly when Mrs. Fisher tapped a small gong on the table beside her as if she had been accustomed to that gong and table since childhood, and when Francesca appeared, Mrs. Fisher commanded her in Dante's language to bring more milk. There was a strange air about Mrs. Fisher, thought Mrs. Arbuthnot, of being in control; and if she hadn’t been so happy, she might have minded.

Mrs. Wilkins noticed it too, but it only made her discursive brain think of cuckoos. She would no doubt immediately have begun to talk of cuckoos, incoherently, unrestrainably and deplorably, if she had been in the condition of nerves and shyness she was in last time she saw Mrs. Fisher. But happiness had done away with shyness—she was very serene; she could control her conversation; she did not have, horrified, to listen to herself saying things she had no idea of saying when she began; she was quite at her ease, and completely natural. The disappointment of not going to be able to prepare a welcome for Mrs. Fisher had evaporated at once, for it was impossible to go on being disappointed in heaven. Nor did she mind her behaving as hostess. What did it matter? You did not mind things in heaven. She and Mrs. Arbuthnot, therefore, sat down more willingly than they otherwise would have done, one on either side of Mrs. Fisher, and the sun, pouring through the two windows facing east across the bay, flooded the room, and there was an open door leading into the garden, and the garden was full of many lovely things, especially freesias.

Mrs. Wilkins noticed it too, but it only made her wandering mind think of cuckoos. She would have immediately started talking about cuckoos, rambling on incoherently and uncontrollably, if she had been as nervous and shy as she was the last time she saw Mrs. Fisher. But happiness had melted away her shyness—she was very calm; she could steer her conversation; she didn’t have to horrifiedly listen to herself saying things she didn’t mean to say when she started; she felt completely at ease and totally natural. The disappointment of not being able to prepare a welcome for Mrs. Fisher had disappeared right away, because it was impossible to stay disappointed in such a joyful moment. Nor did she mind taking on the role of hostess. What did it matter? You didn’t fret about things in paradise. So, she and Mrs. Arbuthnot sat down more readily than they might have otherwise, one on either side of Mrs. Fisher, and the sun, streaming through the two windows facing the bay, flooded the room. There was an open door leading into the garden, which was full of many beautiful things, especially freesias.

The delicate and delicious fragrance of the freesias came in through the door and floated round Mrs. Wilkins’s enraptured nostrils. Freesias in London were quite beyond her. Occasionally she went into a shop and asked what they cost, so as just to have an excuse for lifting up a bunch and smelling them, well knowing that it was something awful like a shilling for about three flowers. Here they were everywhere—bursting out of every corner and carpeting the rose beds. Imagine it—having freesias to pick in armsful if you wanted to, and with glorious sunshine flooding the room, and in your summer frock, and its being only the first of April!

The light and lovely scent of freesias wafted in through the door and surrounded Mrs. Wilkins’s delighted nostrils. Freesias in London were completely out of reach for her. Occasionally, she would go into a shop and ask how much they cost, just so she had a reason to grab a bunch and inhale their fragrance, fully aware that it was something ridiculous like a shilling for just three flowers. Here, they were everywhere—bursting out of every corner and covering the rose beds. Just think about it—having freesias to pick by the armful if you wanted, with glorious sunshine pouring into the room, wearing your summer dress, and it being only the first of April!

“I suppose you realise, don’t you, that we’ve got to heaven?” she said, beaming at Mrs. Fisher with all the familiarity of a fellow-angel.

“I guess you know, right, that we’ve made it to heaven?” she said, smiling at Mrs. Fisher with all the comfort of a fellow angel.

“They are considerably younger than I had supposed,” thought Mrs. Fisher, “and not nearly so plain.” And she mused a moment, while she took no notice of Mrs. Wilkins’s exuberance, on their instant and agitated refusal that day at Prince of Wales Terrace to have anything to do with the giving or the taking of references.

“They're much younger than I thought,” Mrs. Fisher reflected, “and not as plain as I expected.” She pondered for a moment, ignoring Mrs. Wilkins’s excitement, about their immediate and frantic refusal that day at Prince of Wales Terrace to get involved in giving or receiving references.

Nothing could affect her, of course; nothing that anybody did. She was far too solidly seated in respectability. At her back stood massively in a tremendous row those three great names she had offered, and they were not the only ones she could turn to for support and countenance. Even if these young women—she had no grounds for believing the one out in the garden to be really Lady Caroline Dester, she had merely been told she was—even if these young women should all turn out to be what Browning used to call—how well she remembered his amusing and delightful way of putting things—Fly-by-Nights, what could it possibly, or in any way matter to her? Let them fly by night if they wished. One was not sixty-five for nothing. In any case there would only be four weeks of it, at the end of which she would see no more of them. And in the meanwhile there were plenty of places where she could sit quietly away from them and remember. Also there was her own sitting-room, a charming room, all honey-coloured furniture and pictures, with windows to the sea towards Genoa, and a door opening on to the battlements. The house possessed two sitting-rooms, and she had explained to that pretty creature Lady Caroline—certainly a pretty creature, whatever else she was; Tennyson would have enjoyed taking her for blows on the downs—who had seemed inclined to appropriate the honey-coloured one, that she needed some little refuge entirely to herself because of her stick.

Nothing could affect her, of course; nothing anyone did. She was too firmly established in her respectability. Behind her stood those three great names she had offered, massive in their support, and they weren't the only ones she could rely on for reassurance. Even if these young women—she had no reason to believe the one in the garden was truly Lady Caroline Dester; she had just been told as much—even if these young women turned out to be what Browning used to call—how well she remembered his charming and clever way of putting things—Fly-by-Nights, what could it possibly matter to her? Let them fly by night if they wanted. One wasn't sixty-five for nothing. In any case, it would only last four weeks, after which she wouldn't see them anymore. In the meantime, there were plenty of places where she could sit quietly away from them and reminisce. Plus, there was her own sitting room, a lovely space with all honey-colored furniture and pictures, windows facing the sea towards Genoa, and a door leading to the battlements. The house had two sitting rooms, and she had explained to that pretty girl, Lady Caroline—certainly a pretty girl, whatever else she was; Tennyson would have enjoyed taking her for walks on the downs—that she needed a little refuge entirely to herself because of her cane.

“Nobody wants to see an old woman hobbling about everywhere,” she had said. “I shall be quite content to spend much of my time by myself in here or sitting out on these convenient battlements.”

“Nobody wants to see an old woman limping around everywhere,” she had said. “I’ll be perfectly happy to spend most of my time by myself in here or sitting out on these handy battlements.”

And she had a very nice bedroom, too; it looked two ways, across the bay to the morning sun—she liked the morning sun—and onto the garden. There were only two of these bedrooms with cross-views in the house, she and Lady Caroline had discovered, and they were by far the airiest. They each had two beds in them, and she and Lady Caroline had had the extra beds taken out at once and put into two of the other rooms. In this way there was much more space and comfort. Lady Caroline, indeed, had turned hers into a bed-sitting-room, with the sofa out of the bigger drawing-room and the writing-table and the most comfortable chair, but she herself had not had to do that because she had her own sitting-room, equipped with what was necessary. Lady Caroline had thought at first of taking the bigger sitting-room entirely for her own, because the dining-room on the floor below could quite well be used between meals to sit in by the two others, and was a very pleasant room with nice chairs, but she had not liked the bigger sitting-room’s shape—it was a round room in the tower, with deep slit windows pierced through the massive walls, and a domed and ribbed ceiling arranged to look like an open umbrella, and it seemed a little dark. Undoubtedly Lady Caroline had cast covetous glances at the honey-coloured room, and if she, Mrs. Fisher, had been less firm would have installed herself in it. Which would have been absurd.

And she had a really nice bedroom, too; it had views in two directions, across the bay to the morning sun—she loved the morning sun—and into the garden. There were only two of these cross-view bedrooms in the house, she and Lady Caroline had found out, and they were definitely the most spacious. Each room had two beds, and she and Lady Caroline immediately had the extra beds removed and placed in two of the other rooms. This way, there was a lot more space and comfort. In fact, Lady Caroline had turned hers into a combined bedroom and sitting area, with the sofa from the bigger drawing room, along with a writing desk and the coziest chair, but she didn’t need to because she had her own sitting room, fully equipped with everything she needed. Lady Caroline had initially considered taking the larger sitting room entirely for herself since the dining room downstairs could easily be used for the two of them to sit in between meals, and it was a really nice room with good chairs, but she didn't like the shape of the bigger sitting room—it was round and located in the tower, with deep slit windows cut into the thick walls, and a domed ceiling that looked like an open umbrella, making it feel a bit dark. No doubt, Lady Caroline had eyed the honey-colored room with envy, and if Mrs. Fisher hadn't been more assertive, she would have ended up in there, which would have been ridiculous.

“I hope,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smilingly making an attempt to convey to Mrs. Fisher that though she, Mrs. Fisher, might not be exactly a guest she certainly was not in the very least a hostess, “your room is comfortable.”

“I hope,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said with a smile, trying to communicate to Mrs. Fisher that even if she wasn’t exactly a guest, she definitely wasn’t a hostess, “your room is comfortable.”

“Quite,” said Mrs. Fisher. “Will you have some more coffee?”

“Sure,” said Mrs. Fisher. “Would you like some more coffee?”

“No, thank you. Will you?”

“No, thanks. Will you?”

“No, thank you. There were two beds in my bedroom, filling it up unnecessarily, and I had one taken out. It has made it much more convenient.”

“No, thank you. There were two beds in my bedroom, which made it a bit cramped, so I had one removed. It’s made the space much more convenient.”

“Oh that’s why I’ve got two beds in my room!” exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins, illuminated; the second bed in her little cell had seemed an unnatural and inappropriate object from the moment she saw it.

“Oh that’s why I’ve got two beds in my room!” exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins, realizing; the second bed in her small space had seemed like an odd and unsuitable item from the moment she saw it.

“I gave no directions,” said Mrs. Fisher, addressing Mrs. Arbuthnot, “I merely asked Francesca to remove it.”

“I didn't give any instructions,” Mrs. Fisher said to Mrs. Arbuthnot, “I just asked Francesca to take it away.”

“I have two in my room as well,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

"I have two in my room too," said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Your second one must be Lady Caroline’s. She had hers removed too,” said Mrs. Fisher. “It seems foolish to have more beds in a room than there are occupiers.”

“Your second one must be Lady Caroline’s. She had hers taken out too,” Mrs. Fisher said. “It seems pointless to have more beds in a room than people staying there.”

“But we haven’t got any husbands here either,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “and I don’t see any use in extra beds in one’s room if one hasn’t got husbands to put in them. Can’t we have them taken away too?”

“But we don’t have any husbands here either,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “and I don’t see the point in having extra beds in the room if there are no husbands to put in them. Can’t we get them taken away too?”

“Beds,” said Mrs. Fisher coldly, “cannot be removed from one room after another. They must remain somewhere.”

“Beds,” Mrs. Fisher said coldly, “can’t be moved from one room to another. They need to stay in one place.”

Mrs. Wilkins’s remarks seemed to Mrs. Fisher persistently unfortunate. Each time she opened her mouth she said something best left unsaid. Loose talk about husbands had never in Mrs. Fisher’s circle been encouraged. In the ’eighties, when she chiefly flourished, husbands were taken seriously, as the only real obstacles to sin. Beds too, if they had to be mentioned, were approached with caution; and a decent reserve prevented them and husbands ever being spoken of in the same breath.

Mrs. Wilkins's comments struck Mrs. Fisher as consistently unfortunate. Every time she spoke, she remarked about things that were better left unsaid. Open discussions about husbands had never been acceptable in Mrs. Fisher's social circle. In the '80s, when she was most active, husbands were taken seriously as the main barriers to wrongdoing. Beds, if they had to be mentioned, were discussed carefully; and a decent level of restraint ensured that they and husbands were never spoken of together.

She turned more markedly than ever to Mrs. Arbuthnot. “Do let me give you a little more coffee,” she said.

She turned more noticeably than ever to Mrs. Arbuthnot. “Let me pour you some more coffee,” she said.

“No, thank you. But won’t you have some more?”

“No, thank you. But how about having some more?”

“No indeed. I never have more than two cups at breakfast. Would you like an orange?”

"No, I really don't. I only have two cups at breakfast. Would you like an orange?"

“No, thank you. Would you?”

“No, thanks. Would you?”

“No, I don’t eat fruit at breakfast. It is an American fashion which I am too old now to adopt. Have you had all you want?”

“No, I don’t eat fruit for breakfast. It’s an American trend that I’m too old to start now. Have you had enough?”

“Quite. Have you?”

“Totally. Have you?”

Mrs. Fisher paused before replying. Was this a habit, this trick of answering a simple question with the same question? If so it must be curbed, for no one could live for four weeks in any real comfort with somebody who had a habit.

Mrs. Fisher paused before replying. Was this a habit, this way of answering a simple question with the same question? If so, it needed to be fixed, because no one could live in any real comfort with someone who had a habit for four weeks.

She glanced at Mrs. Arbuthnot, and her parted hair and gentle brow reassured her. No; it was accident, not habit, that had produced those echoes. She could as soon imagine a dove having tiresome habits as Mrs. Arbuthnot. Considering her, she thought what a splendid wife she would have been for poor Carlyle. So much better than that horrid clever Jane. She would have soothed him.

She looked at Mrs. Arbuthnot, and her neatly parted hair and kind expression put her at ease. No, it was just a coincidence, not something habitual, that had created those echoes. She could as easily picture a dove having annoying habits as Mrs. Arbuthnot. As she considered her, she thought about how great a wife she would have been for poor Carlyle. So much better than that awful smart Jane. She would have comforted him.

“Then shall we go?” she suggested.

“Shall we go now?” she asked.

“Let me help you up,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, all consideration.

“Let me help you up,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, being very thoughtful.

“Oh, thank you—I can manage perfectly. It’s only sometimes that my stick prevents me—”

“Oh, thank you—I can handle it just fine. It’s just that sometimes my cane gets in the way—”

Mrs. Fisher got up quite easily; Mrs. Arbuthnot had hovered over her for nothing.

Mrs. Fisher got up with no trouble at all; Mrs. Arbuthnot had stayed close for no reason.

I’m going to have one of these gorgeous oranges,” said Mrs. Wilkins, staying where she was and reaching across to a black bowl piled with them. “Rose, how can you resist them. Look—have this one. Do have this beauty—” And she held out a big one.

“I’m going to have one of these gorgeous oranges,” said Mrs. Wilkins, staying where she was and reaching across to a black bowl piled with them. “Rose, how can you resist them? Look—have this one. Take this beauty—” And she held out a big one.

“No, I’m going to see to my duties,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, moving towards the door. “You’ll forgive me for leaving you, won’t you,” she added politely to Mrs. Fisher.

“No, I’m going to take care of my responsibilities,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, heading toward the door. “You’ll forgive me for leaving you, won’t you?” she added politely to Mrs. Fisher.

Mrs. Fisher moved towards the door too; quite easily; almost quickly; her stick did not hinder her at all. She had no intention of being left with Mrs. Wilkins.

Mrs. Fisher walked over to the door as well; quite easily; almost quickly; her cane didn’t slow her down at all. She had no desire to be left alone with Mrs. Wilkins.

“What time would you like to have lunch?” Mrs. Arbuthnot asked her, trying to keep her head as at least a non-guest, if not precisely a hostess, above water.

“What time would you like to have lunch?” Mrs. Arbuthnot asked her, trying to maintain her position as a non-guest, if not exactly a hostess, above water.

“Lunch,” said Mrs. Fisher, “is at half-past twelve.”

“Lunch,” said Mrs. Fisher, “is at 12:30.”

“You shall have it at half-past twelve then,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “I’ll tell the cook. It will be a great struggle,” she continued, smiling, “but I’ve brought a little dictionary—”

“You'll have it at twelve-thirty then,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “I’ll let the cook know. It will be quite a challenge,” she added with a smile, “but I’ve brought a little dictionary—”

“The cook,” said Mrs. Fisher, “knows.”

“The cook,” Mrs. Fisher said, “knows.”

“Oh?” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Oh?” Mrs. Arbuthnot said.

“Lady Caroline has already told her,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Lady Caroline has already told her,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Oh?” said Mrs. Arbuthnot again.

“Oh?” Mrs. Arbuthnot said again.

“Yes. Lady Caroline speaks the kind of Italian cooks understand. I am prevented going into the kitchen because of my stick. And even if I were able to go, I fear I shouldn’t be understood.”

“Yes. Lady Caroline speaks the kind of Italian that cooks can understand. I can’t go into the kitchen because of my cane. And even if I could, I’m afraid I wouldn’t be understood.”

“But—” began Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“But—” started Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“But it’s too wonderful,” Mrs. Wilkins finished for her from the table, delighted with these unexpected simplifications in her and Rose’s lives. “Why, we’ve got positively nothing to do here, either of us, except just be happy. You wouldn’t believe,” she said, turning her head and speaking straight to Mrs. Fisher, portions of orange in either hand, “how terribly good Rose and I have been for years without stopping, and how much now we need a perfect rest.”

“But it’s too wonderful,” Mrs. Wilkins finished for her from the table, thrilled with these unexpected simplifications in her and Rose’s lives. “Why, we’ve got absolutely nothing to do here, for either of us, except just be happy. You wouldn’t believe,” she said, turning her head and speaking directly to Mrs. Fisher, with pieces of orange in both hands, “how incredibly good Rose and I have been for years without a break, and how much we really need a perfect rest now.”

And Mrs. Fisher, going without answering her out of the room, said to herself, “She must, she shall be curbed.”

And Mrs. Fisher, walking out of the room without answering her, said to herself, “She must be controlled. She will be controlled.”

Chapter 8

Presently, when Mrs. Wilkins and Mrs. Arbuthnot, unhampered by any duties, wandered out and down the worn stone steps and under the pergola into the lower garden, Mrs. Wilkins said to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who seemed pensive, “Don’t you see that if somebody else does the ordering it frees us?”

Right now, as Mrs. Wilkins and Mrs. Arbuthnot, free from any responsibilities, strolled down the worn stone steps and under the pergola into the lower garden, Mrs. Wilkins said to Mrs. Arbuthnot, who looked thoughtful, “Don’t you realize that if someone else takes care of the orders, it gives us freedom?”

Mrs. Arbuthnot said she did see, but nevertheless she thought it rather silly to have everything taken out of their hands.

Mrs. Arbuthnot said she did see, but still she thought it was pretty silly to have everything taken out of their hands.

“I love things to be taken out of my hands,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“I love when things are taken out of my hands,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“But we found San Salvatore,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, “and it is rather silly that Mrs. Fisher should behave as if it belonged only to her.”

“But we found San Salvatore,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, “and it’s pretty ridiculous that Mrs. Fisher acts like it’s hers alone.”

“What is rather silly,” said Mrs. Wilkins with much serenity, “is to mind. I can’t see the least point in being in authority at the price of one’s liberty.”

“What’s pretty silly,” said Mrs. Wilkins calmly, “is to care. I don’t see the slightest point in having authority if it costs you your freedom.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot said nothing to that for two reasons—first, because she was struck by the remarkable and growing calm of the hitherto incoherent and excited Lotty, and secondly because what she was looking at was so very beautiful.

Mrs. Arbuthnot didn’t say anything for two reasons—first, because she was amazed by the remarkable and growing calm of the previously incoherent and excited Lotty, and second, because what she was looking at was incredibly beautiful.

All down the stone steps on either side were periwinkles in full flower, and she could now see what it was that had caught at her the night before and brushed, wet and scented, across her face. It was wistaria. Wistaria and sunshine . . . she remembered the advertisement. Here indeed were both in profusion. The wistaria was tumbling over itself in its excess of life, its prodigality of flowering; and where the pergola ended the sun blazed on scarlet geraniums, bushes of them, and nasturtiums in great heaps, and marigolds so brilliant that they seemed to be burning, and red and pink snapdragons, all outdoing each other in bright, fierce colour. The ground behind these flaming things dropped away in terraces to the sea, each terrace a little orchard, where among the olives grew vines on trellises, and fig-trees, and peach-trees, and cherry-trees. The cherry-trees and peach-trees were in blossom—lovely showers of white and deep rose-colour among the trembling delicacy of the olives; the fig-leaves were just big enough to smell of figs, the vine-buds were only beginning to show. And beneath these trees were groups of blue and purple irises, and bushes of lavender, and grey, sharp cactuses, and the grass was thick with dandelions and daisies, and right down at the bottom was the sea. Colour seemed flung down anyhow, anywhere; every sort of colour, piled up in heaps, pouring along in rivers—the periwinkles looked exactly as if they were being poured down each side of the steps—and flowers that grow only in borders in England, proud flowers keeping themselves to themselves over there, such as the great blue irises and the lavender, were being jostled by small, shining common things like dandelions and daisies and the white bells of the wild onion, and only seemed the better and the more exuberant for it.

All along the stone steps, periwinkles were blooming, and she could finally see what had caught her attention the night before and brushed against her face, wet and fragrant. It was wisteria. Wisteria and sunshine . . . she remembered the ad. Here they both were, in abundance. The wisteria was cascading over itself in a burst of life, overflowing with flowers; and where the pergola ended, the sun blazed on bright red geraniums, bushes of them, and large mounds of nasturtiums, as well as marigolds so vivid they looked like they were on fire, and red and pink snapdragons, all competing with each other in bold, vibrant colors. The ground behind these fiery flowers dropped down in terraces to the sea, each terrace a small orchard, where vines grew on trellises among the olive trees, along with fig trees, peach trees, and cherry trees. The cherry and peach trees were in bloom, featuring lovely showers of white and deep rose among the delicate olive leaves; the fig leaves were just big enough to give off a hint of figs, while the vine buds were just starting to show. Beneath these trees were clusters of blue and purple irises, lavender bushes, sharp gray cacti, and the grass was thick with dandelions and daisies, and right at the bottom was the sea. Colors seemed to be scattered everywhere; every kind of color, piled up in heaps, flowing like rivers—the periwinkles looked as if they were being poured down each side of the steps—and flowers that grow only in borders in England, proud flowers keeping to themselves over there, like the large blue irises and lavender, were being crowded by small, shiny common things like dandelions, daisies, and the white bells of wild onions, only looking better and more vibrant for it.

They stood looking at this crowd of loveliness, this happy jumble, in silence. No, it didn’t matter what Mrs. Fisher did; not here; not in such beauty. Mrs. Arbuthnot’s discomposure melted out of her. In the warmth and light of what she was looking at, of what to her was a manifestation, an entirely new side of God, how could one be discomposed? If only Frederick were with her, seeing it too, seeing as he would have seen it when first they were lovers, in the days when he saw what she saw and loved what she loved. . .

They stood silently, taking in the beauty of the vibrant crowd, this joyful mix. It didn’t matter what Mrs. Fisher did; not in this moment; not in such splendor. Mrs. Arbuthnot’s tension faded away. Surrounded by the warmth and light of what she was witnessing, an entirely new aspect of God to her, how could anyone feel uneasy? If only Frederick were here with her, experiencing it too, just like he did when they were first in love, when he understood her perspective and adored the things she loved...

She sighed.

She sighed.

“You mustn’t sigh in heaven,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “One doesn’t.”

“You shouldn’t sigh in heaven,” Mrs. Wilkins said. “People don’t do that.”

“I was thinking how one longs to share this with those one loves,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“I was thinking about how much we want to share this with the people we love,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said.

“You mustn’t long in heaven,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “You’re supposed to be quite complete there. And it is heaven, isn’t it, Rose? See how everything has been let in together—the dandelions and the irises, the vulgar and the superior, me and Mrs. Fisher—all welcome, all mixed up anyhow, and all so visibly happy and enjoying ourselves.”

“You shouldn't linger in heaven,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “You're meant to be truly fulfilled there. And it is heaven, right, Rose? Look at how everything has come together—the dandelions and the irises, the ordinary and the extraordinary, me and Mrs. Fisher—all welcome, all mixed up anyway, and all so clearly happy and enjoying ourselves.”

“Mrs. Fisher doesn’t seem happy—not visibly, anyhow,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling.

“Mrs. Fisher doesn't look happy—not on the surface, anyway,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling.

“She’ll begin soon, you’ll see.”

“She’ll start soon, you’ll see.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot said she didn’t believe that after a certain age people began anything.

Mrs. Arbuthnot said she didn’t think that after a certain age people started anything.

Mrs. Wilkins said she was sure no one, however old and tough, could resist the effects of perfect beauty. Before many days, perhaps only hours, they would see Mrs. Fisher bursting out into every kind of exuberance. “I’m quite sure,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “that we’ve got to heaven, and once Mrs. Fisher realises that that’s where she is, she’s bound to be different. You’ll see. She’ll leave off being ossified, and go all soft and able to stretch, and we shall get quite—why, I shouldn’t be surprised if we get quite fond of her.”

Mrs. Wilkins said she was sure no one, no matter how old and tough, could resist the effects of perfect beauty. In just a few days, maybe even hours, they would see Mrs. Fisher bursting into all kinds of excitement. “I’m convinced,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “that we’ve reached heaven, and once Mrs. Fisher realizes that’s where she is, she’ll definitely be different. You’ll see. She’ll stop being stiff and start to open up, and we’ll end up—honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if we start to really like her.”

The idea of Mrs. Fisher bursting out into anything, she who seemed so particularly firmly fixed inside her buttons, made Mrs. Arbuthnot laugh. She condoned Lotty’s loose way of talking of heaven, because in such a place, on such a morning, condonation was in the very air. Besides, what an excuse there was.

The thought of Mrs. Fisher suddenly breaking out of her usual calm demeanor made Mrs. Arbuthnot laugh. She overlooked Lotty’s free-spirited way of talking about heaven, because on a morning like this, it just felt right to be forgiving. Plus, there was such a good reason for it.

And Lady Caroline, sitting where they had left her before breakfast on the wall, peeped over when she heard laughter, and saw them standing on the path below, and thought what a mercy it was they were laughing down there and had not come up and done it round her. She disliked jokes at all times, but in the morning she hated them; especially close up; especially crowding in her ears. She hoped the originals were on their way out for a walk, and not on their way back from one. They were laughing more and more. What could they possibly find to laugh at?

And Lady Caroline, sitting where they had left her before breakfast on the wall, peeked over when she heard laughter and saw them standing on the path below. She thought what a relief it was that they were laughing down there and hadn’t come up to do it around her. She disliked jokes at any time, but in the morning, she hated them—especially when they were close by and crowding in her ears. She hoped the originals were on their way out for a walk and not coming back from one. They were laughing more and more. What could they possibly find to laugh at?

She looked down on the tops of their heads with a very serious face, for the thought of spending a month with laughers was a grave one, and they, as though they felt her eyes, turned suddenly and looked up.

She looked down at the tops of their heads with a very serious expression, because the thought of spending a month surrounded by people who laugh a lot was a serious one, and they, as if sensing her gaze, suddenly turned and looked up.

The dreadful geniality of those women. . .

The awful friendliness of those women. . .

She shrank away from their smiles and wavings, but she could not shrink out of sight without falling into the lilies. She neither smiled nor waved back, and turning her eyes to the more distant mountains surveyed them carefully till the two, tired of waving, moved away along the path and turned the corner and disappeared.

She backed away from their smiles and waves, but she couldn’t disappear without falling into the lilies. She neither smiled nor waved back, and turning her gaze to the distant mountains, she studied them carefully until the two, tired of waving, walked away along the path, turned the corner, and vanished.

This time they both did notice that they had been met with, at least, unresponsiveness.

This time they both noticed that they had faced at least some indifference.

“If we weren’t in heaven,” said Mrs. Wilkins serenely, “I should say we had been snubbed, but as nobody snubs anybody there of course we can’t have been.”

“If we weren’t in heaven,” Mrs. Wilkins said calmly, “I would say we had been ignored, but since nobody ignores anyone here, clearly we can’t have been.”

“Perhaps she is unhappy,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

"Maybe she's not happy," said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Whatever it is she is she’ll get over it here,” said Mrs. Wilkins with conviction.

“Whatever she is, she’ll get through it here,” said Mrs. Wilkins confidently.

“We must try and help her,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“We need to try and help her,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Oh, but nobody helps anybody in heaven. That’s finished with. You don’t try to be, or do. You simply are.”

“Oh, but nobody helps anyone in heaven. That’s over. You don’t try to be or do anything. You simply are.”

Well, Mrs. Arbuthnot wouldn’t go into that—not here, not to-day. The vicar, she knew, would have called Lotty’s talk levity, if not profanity. How old he seemed from here; an old, old vicar.

Well, Mrs. Arbuthnot wouldn’t get into that—not here, not today. The vicar, she knew, would have called Lotty’s talk trivial, if not blasphemous. He seemed so old from here; such an old, old vicar.

They left the path, and clambered down the olive terraces, down and down, to where at the bottom the warm, sleepy sea heaved gently among the rocks. There a pine-tree grew close to the water, and they sat under it, and a few yards away was a fishing-boat lying motionless and green-bellied on the water. The ripples of the sea made little gurgling noises at their feet. They screwed up their eyes to be able to look into the blaze of light beyond the shade of their tree. The hot smell from the pine-needles and from the cushions of wild thyme that padded the spaces between the rocks, and sometimes a smell of pure honey from a clump of warm irises up behind them in the sun, puffed across their faces. Very soon Mrs. Wilkins took her shoes and stockings off, and let her feet hang in the water. After watching her a minute Mrs. Arbuthnot did the same. Their happiness was then complete. Their husbands would not have known them. They left off talking. They ceased to mention heaven. They were just cups of acceptance.

They stepped off the path and climbed down the olive terraces, lower and lower, until they reached the bottom where the warm, lazy sea gently rolled among the rocks. A pine tree grew right by the water, and they sat underneath it, with a fishing boat a few yards away, lying still and green-bellied on the water. The ripples of the sea made soft gurgling sounds at their feet. They squinted to see through the bright light beyond the shade of their tree. The hot scent of pine needles and the cushions of wild thyme that filled the spaces between the rocks, along with the occasional fragrance of pure honey from a patch of warm irises behind them in the sun, wafted across their faces. Soon, Mrs. Wilkins took off her shoes and stockings and dipped her feet into the water. After watching her for a moment, Mrs. Arbuthnot did the same. Their happiness was complete. Their husbands wouldn't have recognized them. They stopped talking. They didn’t mention heaven anymore. They were just vessels of acceptance.

Meanwhile Lady Caroline, on her wall, was considering her position. The garden on the top of the wall was a delicious garden, but its situation made it insecure and exposed to interruptions. At any moment the others might come and want to use it, because both the hall and the dining-room had doors opening straight into it. Perhaps, thought Lady Caroline, she could arrange that it should be solely hers. Mrs. Fisher had the battlements, delightful with flowers, and a watch-tower all to herself, besides having snatched the one really nice room in the house. There were plenty of places the originals could go to—she had herself seen at least two other little gardens, while the hill the castle stood on was itself a garden, with walks and seats. Why should not this one spot be kept exclusively for her? She liked it; she liked it best of all. It had the Judas tree and an umbrella pine, it had the freesias and the lilies, it had a tamarisk beginning to flush pink, it had the convenient low wall to sit on, it had from each of its three sides the most amazing views—to the east the bay and mountains, to the north the village across the tranquil clear green water of the little harbour and the hills dotted with white houses and orange groves, and to the west was the thin thread of land by which San Salvatore was tied to the mainland, and then the open sea and the coast line beyond Genoa reaching away into the blue dimness of France. Yes, she would say she wanted to have this entirely to herself. How obviously sensible if each of them had their own special place to sit in apart. It was essential to her comfort that she should be able to be apart, left alone, not talked to. The others ought to like it best too. Why herd? One had enough of that in England, with one’s relations and friends—oh, the numbers of them!—pressing on one continually. Having successfully escaped them for four weeks why continue, and with persons having no earthly claim on one, to herd?

Meanwhile, Lady Caroline sat on her wall, pondering her situation. The garden at the top of the wall was beautiful, but its location made it vulnerable and prone to interruptions. At any moment, others could come and want to use it, as both the hall and the dining room had doors that opened right into it. Maybe, thought Lady Caroline, she could arrange to make it exclusively hers. Mrs. Fisher had the battlements, lovely with flowers, and a watchtower all to herself, plus she had taken the one really nice room in the house. There were plenty of places the originals could use—she had seen at least two other little gardens herself, while the hill the castle stood on was a garden too, with paths and seats. Why shouldn’t this one spot be kept just for her? She loved it; it was her favorite. It had the Judas tree and an umbrella pine, freesias and lilies, and a tamarisk starting to blush pink. There was the convenient low wall to sit on, and from each of its three sides, there were incredible views—east toward the bay and mountains, north over the village across the calm, clear green water of the little harbor and the hills with white houses and orange groves, and west to the narrow strip of land connecting San Salvatore to the mainland, followed by the open sea and the coastline beyond Genoa stretching into the blue haze of France. Yes, she would say she wanted this entirely to herself. How sensible it would be for each of them to have their own special place to sit apart. It was crucial for her comfort that she could be alone, not talked to. The others should like it best too. Why crowd together? One had enough of that in England, with family and friends—oh, the numbers of them!—constantly around. After successfully escaping them for four weeks, why keep herding together with people who had no real claim on her?

She lit a cigarette. She began to feel secure. Those two had gone for a walk. There was no sign of Mrs. Fisher. How very pleasant this was.

She lit a cigarette. She started to feel at ease. Those two had gone for a walk. There was no sign of Mrs. Fisher. How nice this was.

Somebody came out through the glass doors, just as she was drawing a deep breath of security. Surely it couldn’t be Mrs. Fisher, wanting to sit with her? Mrs. Fisher had her battlements. She ought to stay on them, having snatched them. It would be too tiresome if she wouldn’t, and wanted not only to have them and her sitting-room but to establish herself in this garden as well.

Somebody came through the glass doors right as she was taking a deep breath of relief. Surely it couldn’t be Mrs. Fisher wanting to sit with her? Mrs. Fisher had her territory. She should stick to it since she had claimed it. It would be exhausting if she didn’t and wanted not just her space and her sitting room but also to set herself up in this garden.

No; it wasn’t Mrs. Fisher, it was the cook.

No; it wasn’t Mrs. Fisher, it was the cook.

She frowned. Was she going to have to go on ordering the food? Surely one or other of those two waving women would do that now.

She frowned. Was she going to have to keep ordering the food? Surely one of those two women waving would handle it now.

The cook, who had been waiting in increasing agitation in the kitchen, watching the clock getting nearer to lunch-time while she still was without knowledge of what lunch was to consist of, had gone at last to Mrs. Fisher, who had immediately waved her away. She then wandered about the house seeking a mistress, any mistress, who would tell her what to cook, and finding none; and at last, directed by Francesca, who always knew where everybody was, came out to Lady Caroline.

The cook, who had been growing more anxious in the kitchen as she watched the clock get closer to lunchtime without knowing what to prepare, finally went to Mrs. Fisher, who promptly waved her off. She then roamed around the house looking for a mistress, any mistress, who could tell her what to make, but found none; and eventually, guided by Francesca, who always seemed to know where everyone was, she made her way to Lady Caroline.

Domenico had provided this cook. She was Costanza, the sister of that one of his cousins who kept a restaurant down on the piazza. She helped her brother in his cooking when she had no other job, and knew every sort of fat, mysterious Italian dish such as the workmen of Castagneto, who crowded the restaurant at midday, and the inhabitants of Mezzago when they came over on Sundays, loved to eat. She was a fleshless spinster of fifty, grey-haired, nimble, rich of speech, and thought Lady Caroline more beautiful than anyone she had ever seen; and so did Domenico; and so did the boy Giuseppe who helped Domenico and was, besides, his nephew; and so did the girl Angela who helped Francesca and was, besides, Domenico’s niece; and so did Francesca herself. Domenico and Francesca, the only two who had seen them, thought the two ladies who arrived last very beautiful, but compared to the fair young lady who arrived first they were as candles to the electric light that had lately been installed, and as the tin tubs in the bedrooms to the wonderful new bathroom their master had had arranged on his last visit.

Domenico had hired this cook. Her name was Costanza, the sister of one of his cousins who owned a restaurant down in the square. She helped her brother with cooking whenever she didn’t have another job, and she knew all kinds of rich, mysterious Italian dishes that the workers from Castagneto, who filled the restaurant at noon, and the people from Mezzago, who came over on Sundays, loved to eat. She was a thin, fifty-year-old spinster with grey hair, quick on her feet, well-spoken, and thought Lady Caroline was more beautiful than anyone she had ever seen; Domenico thought so too; so did the boy Giuseppe, who assisted Domenico and was also his nephew; and Angela, who helped Francesca and was Domenico’s niece; and Francesca herself. Domenico and Francesca, the only two who had seen them, thought the two ladies who arrived later were very beautiful, but compared to the fair young lady who arrived first, they looked like candles next to the electric light that had just been installed, and like tin tubs in the bedrooms compared to the amazing new bathroom their master had set up on his last visit.

Lady Caroline scowled at the cook. The scowl, as usual, was transformed on the way into what appeared to be an intent and beautiful gravity, and Costanza threw up her hands and took the saints aloud to witness that here was the very picture of the Mother of God.

Lady Caroline frowned at the cook. The frown, as always, quickly changed into what looked like a serious and beautiful demeanor, and Costanza raised her hands and boldly proclaimed that this was the very image of the Mother of God.

Lady Caroline asked her crossly what she wanted, and Costanza’s head went on one side with delight at the sheer music of her voice. She said, after waiting a moment in case the music was going to continue, for she didn’t wish to miss any of it, that she wanted orders; she had been to the Signorina’s mother, but in vain.

Lady Caroline asked her irritably what she wanted, and Costanza tilted her head with joy at the sound of her voice. She said, after pausing a moment to see if the sound would carry on since she didn't want to miss any of it, that she wanted instructions; she had gone to the Signorina's mother, but it had been pointless.

“She is not my mother,” repudiated Lady Caroline angrily; and her anger sounded like the regretful wail of a melodious orphan.

“She is not my mother,” Lady Caroline insisted angrily; and her anger sounded like the sorrowful cry of a beautiful orphan.

Costanza poured forth pity. She too, she explained, had no mother—

Costanza expressed her sympathy. She also explained that she had no mother—

Lady Caroline interrupted with the curt information that her mother was alive and in London.

Lady Caroline interrupted with the blunt news that her mother was alive and in London.

Costanza praised God and the saints that the young lady did not yet know what it was like to be without a mother. Quickly enough did misfortunes overtake one; no doubt the young lady already had a husband.

Costanza thanked God and the saints that the young lady still didn't know what it was like to be without a mother. Misfortunes could strike quickly; no doubt the young lady already had a husband.

“No,” said Lady Caroline icily. Worse than jokes in the morning did she hate the idea of husbands. And everybody was always trying to press them on her—all her relations, all her friends, all the evening papers. After all, she could only marry one, anyhow; but you would think from the way everybody talked, and especially those persons who wanted to be husbands, that she could marry at least a dozen.

“No,” said Lady Caroline coldly. She hated the idea of husbands even more than morning jokes. Everyone was always trying to push them on her—her relatives, her friends, and the evening papers. After all, she could only marry one, but you would think from the way everyone talked, especially those who wanted to be husbands, that she could marry at least a dozen.

Her soft, pathetic “No” made Costanza, who was standing close to her, well with sympathy.

Her soft, heartbreaking "No" made Costanza, who was standing close to her, feel a rush of sympathy.

“Poor little one,” said Costanza, moved actually to pat her encouragingly on the shoulder, “take hope. There is still time.”

“Poor little thing,” Costanza said, actually feeling moved to give her an encouraging pat on the shoulder. “Hang in there. There's still time.”

“For lunch,” said Lady Caroline freezingly, marvelling as she spoke that she should be patted, she who had taken so much trouble to come to a place, remote and hidden, where she could be sure that among other things of a like oppressive nature pattings also were not, “we will have—”

“For lunch,” said Lady Caroline coldly, wondering as she spoke why she should be patted, she who had gone to such lengths to come to a place, remote and hidden, where she could be sure that, among other oppressive things, there were also no pats, “we will have—”

Costanza became business-like. She interrupted with suggestions, and her suggestions were all admirable and all expensive.

Costanza became professional. She chimed in with suggestions, and all her ideas were impressive and quite pricey.

Lady Caroline did not know they were expensive, and fell in with them at once. They sounded very nice. Every sort of young vegetables and fruits came into them, and much butter and a great deal of cream and incredible numbers of eggs. Costanza said enthusiastically at the end, as a tribute to this acquiescence, that of the many ladies and gentlemen she had worked for on temporary jobs such as this she preferred the English ladies and gentlemen. She more than preferred them—they roused devotion in her. For they knew what to order; they did not skimp; they refrained from grinding down the faces of the poor.

Lady Caroline didn’t realize they were expensive and immediately connected with them. They sounded delightful. All kinds of young vegetables and fruits were included, along with a lot of butter, plenty of cream, and an incredible number of eggs. Costanza said enthusiastically at the end, as a nod to this agreement, that out of all the ladies and gentlemen she had worked for on temporary jobs like this one, she preferred the English ladies and gentlemen. In fact, she loved them—they inspired loyalty in her. They knew how to order; they didn’t cut corners; they didn’t take advantage of the less fortunate.

From this Lady Caroline concluded that she had been extravagant, and promptly countermanded the cream.

From this, Lady Caroline concluded that she had been wasteful and quickly canceled the cream.

Costanza’s face fell, for she had a cousin who had a cow, and the cream was to have come from them both.

Costanza's expression soured because she had a cousin with a cow, and the cream was supposed to come from both of them.

“And perhaps we had better not have chickens,” said Lady Caroline.

“And maybe we shouldn't have chickens,” said Lady Caroline.

Costanza’s face fell more, for her brother at the restaurant kept chickens in his back-yard, and many of them were ready for killing.

Costanza’s face dropped even more because her brother at the restaurant kept chickens in his backyard, and a lot of them were ready to be slaughtered.

“Also do not order strawberries till I have consulted with the other ladies,” said Lady Caroline, remembering that it was only the first of April, and that perhaps people who lived in Hampstead might be poor; indeed, must be poor, or why live in Hampstead? “It is not I who am mistress here.”

“Also, don’t order strawberries until I’ve talked to the other ladies,” said Lady Caroline, remembering that it was only the first of April and that maybe people who lived in Hampstead might be struggling financially; in fact, they must be struggling, or why else would they live in Hampstead? “I’m not the one in charge here.”

“Is it the old one?” asked Costanza, her face very long.

“Is it the old one?” asked Costanza, her face looking really downcast.

“No,” said Lady Caroline.

“No,” said Lady Caroline.

“Which of the other two ladies is it?”

“Which of the other two women is it?”

“Neither,” said Lady Caroline.

“Neither,” said Lady C.

Then Costanza’s smiles returned, for the young lady was having fun with her and making jokes. She told her so, in her friendly Italian way, and was genuinely delighted.

Then Costanza's smiles came back, because the young lady was enjoying herself with her and making jokes. She told her that in her warm Italian manner and was truly happy.

“I never make jokes,” said Lady Caroline briefly. “You had better go, or lunch will certainly not be ready by half-past twelve.”

“I never make jokes,” Lady Caroline said shortly. “You should probably leave, or lunch definitely won’t be ready by twelve-thirty.”

And these curt words came out sounding so sweet that Costanza felt as if kind compliments were being paid her, and forgot her disappointment about the cream and the chickens, and went away all gratitude and smiles.

And those brief words sounded so sweet that Costanza felt like she was receiving kind compliments, and she forgot her disappointment about the cream and the chickens, leaving with gratitude and smiles.

“This,” thought Lady Caroline, “will never do. I haven’t come here to housekeep, and I won’t.”

“This,” thought Lady Caroline, “is not going to work. I didn’t come here to manage a household, and I won’t.”

She called Costanza back. Costanza came running. The sound of her name in that voice enchanted her.

She called Costanza back. Costanza came running. The sound of her name in that voice thrilled her.

“I have ordered the lunch for to-day,” said Lady Caroline, with the serious angel face that was hers when she was annoyed, “and I have also ordered the dinner, but from now on you will go to one of the other ladies for orders. I give no more.”

“I’ve ordered lunch for today,” said Lady Caroline, wearing the serious angelic expression she had when she was annoyed, “and I’ve also ordered dinner, but from now on you’ll need to go to one of the other ladies for orders. I’m done.”

The idea that she would go on giving orders was too absurd. She never gave orders at home. Nobody there dreamed of asking her to do anything. That such a very tiresome activity should be thrust upon her here, simply because she happened to be able to talk Italian, was ridiculous. Let the originals give orders if Mrs. Fisher refused to. Mrs. Fisher, of course, was the one Nature intended for such a purpose. She had the very air of a competent housekeeper. Her clothes were the clothes of a housekeeper, and so was the way she did her hair.

The idea that she would keep giving orders was just too ridiculous. She never gave orders at home. No one there even thought about asking her to do anything. It was absurd that such a tiresome role would be forced on her here, just because she could speak Italian. Let the originals give orders if Mrs. Fisher didn’t want to. Of course, Mrs. Fisher was the one Nature had in mind for that role. She had the look of a capable housekeeper. Her clothes were that of a housekeeper, and so was the way she styled her hair.

Having delivered herself of her ultimatum with an acerbity that turned sweet on the way, and accompanied it by a peremptory gesture of dismissal that had the grace and loving-kindness of a benediction, it was annoying that Costanza should only stand still with her head on one side gazing at her in obvious delight.

Having given her ultimatum with a sharpness that softened as she spoke, and paired it with a decisive wave of her hand that felt both graceful and kind, it was frustrating that Costanza just stood there, tilting her head to the side and looking at her with clear enjoyment.

“Oh, go away!” exclaimed Lady Caroline in English, suddenly exasperated.

“Oh, go away!” Lady Caroline exclaimed in English, suddenly frustrated.

There had been a fly in her bedroom that morning which had stuck just as Costanza was sticking; only one, but it might have been a myriad it was so tiresome from daylight on. It was determined to settle on her face, and she was determined it should not. Its persistence was uncanny. It woke her, and would not let her go to sleep again. She hit at it, and it eluded her without fuss or effort and with an almost visible blandness, and she had only hit herself. It came back again instantly, and with a loud buzz alighted on her cheek. She hit at it again and hurt herself, while it skimmed gracefully away. She lost her temper, and sat up in bed and waited, watching to hit at it and kill it. She kept on hitting at it at last with fury and with all her strength, as if it were a real enemy deliberately trying to madden her; and it elegantly skimmed in and out of her blows, not even angry, to be back again the next instant. It succeeded every time in getting on to her face, and was quite indifferent how often it was driven away. That was why she had dressed and come out so early. Francesca had already been told to put a net over her bed, for she was not going to allow herself to be annoyed twice like that. People were exactly like flies. She wished there were nets for keeping them off too. She hit at them with words and frowns, and like the fly they slipped between her blows and were untouched. Worse than the fly, they seemed unaware that she had even tried to hit them. The fly at least did for a moment go away. With human beings the only way to get rid of them was to go away herself. That was what, so tired, she had done this April; and having got here, having got close up to the details of life at San Salvatore, it appeared that here, too, she was not to be let alone.

There had been a fly in her bedroom that morning, sticking around just like Costanza was. Just one fly, but it felt like a hundred because it was so annoying from daylight on. It was determined to land on her face, and she was determined to keep it off. Its persistence was eerie. It woke her up and wouldn’t let her fall back asleep. She swatted at it, but it dodged her effortlessly and with an almost visible nonchalance, leaving her to hit herself instead. It came back instantly, buzzing loudly as it landed on her cheek. She swatted at it again and hurt herself while it glided away gracefully. Losing her temper, she sat up in bed, waiting to strike and kill it. In a fit of rage, she kept hitting at it with all her strength, as if it were a real enemy trying to drive her mad; yet it elegantly dodged her blows, unaffected, returning the next instant. It managed to land on her face every time, completely indifferent to how often she tried to swat it away. That was why she had gotten up and come out so early. Francesca had already been told to put a net over her bed because she wasn’t going to let herself be bothered like that again. People were just like flies. She wished there were nets to keep them away too. She tried to hit them with words and frowns, but like the fly, they slipped past her efforts and went untouched. Worse than the fly, they seemed completely unaware that she had even tried to swat them. At least the fly would go away for a moment. With people, the only way to get rid of them was to leave herself. That’s what she had done, feeling so tired, that April; and now that she was here, close to the details of life at San Salvatore, it seemed she wouldn’t be left alone here either.

Viewed from London there had seemed to be no details. San Salvatore from there seemed to be an empty, a delicious blank. Yet, after only twenty-four hours of it, she was discovering that it was not a blank at all, and that she was having to ward off as actively as ever. Already she had been much stuck to. Mrs. Fisher had stuck nearly the whole of the day before, and this morning there had been no peace, not ten minutes uninterruptedly alone.

From London, San Salvatore had looked like nothing but a blank canvas. But after just twenty-four hours, she realized it was anything but empty, and she had to guard herself as much as ever. She had already found herself stuck with Mrs. Fisher for most of the previous day, and this morning, there had been no peace—she hadn’t even had ten minutes alone without interruption.

Costanza of course had finally to go because she had to cook, but hardly had she gone before Domenico came. He came to water and tie up. That was natural, since he was the gardener, but he watered and tied up all the things that were nearest to her; he hovered closer and closer; he watered to excess; he tied plants that were as straight and steady as arrows. Well, at least he was a man, and therefore not quite so annoying, and his smiling good-morning was received with an answering smile; upon which Domenico forgot his family, his wife, his mother, his grown-up children and all his duties, and only wanted to kiss the young lady’s feet.

Costanza had to leave because she needed to cook, but hardly had she left before Domenico showed up. He came to water and tie up the plants. That made sense since he was the gardener, but he focused on everything that was closest to her; he got closer and closer; he watered way too much; he tied plants that were already perfectly straight. At least he was a man, so he wasn't quite as annoying, and his cheerful "good morning" was met with a smile in return; with that, Domenico forgot about his family, his wife, his mother, his grown children, and all his responsibilities, and only wanted to kiss the young lady’s feet.

He could not do that, unfortunately, but he could talk while he worked, and talk he did; voluminously; pouring out every kind of information, illustrating what he said with gestures so lively that he had to put down the watering-pot, and thus delay the end of the watering.

He couldn’t do that, unfortunately, but he could talk while he worked, and talk he did; a lot; sharing all kinds of information, illustrating what he said with such lively gestures that he had to put down the watering can, delaying the end of the watering.

Lady Caroline bore it for a time but presently was unable to bear it, and as he would not go, and she could not tell him to, seeing that he was engaged in his proper work, once again it was she who had to.

Lady Caroline endured it for a while, but soon she couldn’t take it anymore. Since he wouldn’t leave and she couldn’t ask him to, considering he was busy with his work, once again, it was up to her to act.

She got off the wall and moved to the other side of the garden, where in a wooden shed were some comfortable low cane chairs. All she wanted was to turn one of these round with its back to Domenico and its front to the sea towards Genoa. Such a little thing to want. One would have thought she might have been allowed to do that unmolested. But he, who watched her every movement, when he saw her approaching the chairs darted after her and seized one and asked to be told where to put it.

She got off the wall and walked to the other side of the garden, where there were some comfortable low wicker chairs in a wooden shed. All she wanted was to turn one of them around so that its back was facing Domenico and its front was facing the sea towards Genoa. Such a small request to make. You would think she could do that without being bothered. But he, who monitored her every move, when he saw her heading toward the chairs, rushed after her, grabbed one, and asked her where to put it.

Would she never get away from being waited on, being made comfortable, being asked where she wanted things put, having to say thank you? She was short with Domenico, who instantly concluded the sun had given her a headache, and ran in and fetched her a sunshade and a cushion and a footstool, and was skilful, and was wonderful, and was one of Nature’s gentlemen.

Would she ever escape being waited on, being made comfortable, being asked where she wanted things, having to say thank you? She was curt with Domenico, who quickly figured the sun had given her a headache, and rushed in to get her a sunshade, a cushion, and a footstool. He was skilled, wonderful, and truly one of Nature’s gentlemen.

She shut her eyes in a heavy resignation. She could not be unkind to Domenico. She could not get up and walk indoors as she would have done if it had been one of the others. Domenico was intelligent and very competent. She had at once discovered that it was he who really ran the house, who really did everything. And his manners were definitely delightful, and he undoubtedly was a charming person. It was only that she did so much long to be let alone. If only, only she could be left quite quiet for this one month, she felt that she might perhaps make something of herself after all.

She closed her eyes with a deep sense of resignation. She couldn’t be unkind to Domenico. She couldn’t just get up and walk inside like she would have done with the others. Domenico was smart and very capable. She quickly realized that he was the one who truly managed the house, who actually did everything. His manners were definitely charming, and he was undoubtedly a lovely person. It was just that she longed so much to be left alone. If only she could have a month of complete peace, she felt that maybe she could finally make something of herself.

She kept her eyes shut, because then he would think she wanted to sleep and would go away.

She kept her eyes closed, because then he would think she wanted to sleep and would leave.

Domenico’s romantic Italian soul melted within him at the sight, for having her eyes shut was extraordinarily becoming to her. He stood entranced, quite still, and she thought he had stolen away, so she opened them again.

Domenico’s romantic Italian soul melted at the sight because having her eyes closed looked incredibly beautiful on her. He stood there, mesmerized and completely still, and she thought he had slipped away, so she opened her eyes again.

No; there he was, staring at her. Even he. There was no getting away from being stared at.

No; there he was, looking at her. Even him. There was no escape from being watched.

“I have a headache,” she said, shutting them again.

“I have a headache,” she said, closing her eyes again.

“It is the sun,” said Domenico, “and sitting on the wall without a hat.”

“It’s the sun,” Domenico said, “and I’m sitting on the wall without a hat.”

“I wish to sleep.”

"I want to sleep."

Sì signorina,” he said sympathetically; and went softly away.

Yes, miss, he said with sympathy; and walked away quietly.

She opened her eyes with a sigh of relief. The gentle closing of the glass doors showed her that he had not only gone quite away but had shut her out in the garden so that she should be undisturbed. Now perhaps she would be alone till lunch-time.

She opened her eyes with a sigh of relief. The gentle closing of the glass doors showed her that he had not only gone far away but had shut her out in the garden so that she wouldn’t be disturbed. Now maybe she would be alone until lunchtime.

It was very curious, and no one in the world could have been more surprised than she herself, but she wanted to think. She had never wanted to do that before. Everything else that it is possible to do without too much inconvenience she had either wanted to do or had done at one period or another of her life, but not before had she wanted to think. She had come to San Salvatore with the single intention of lying comatose for four weeks in the sun, somewhere where her parents and friends were not, lapped in forgetfulness, stirring herself only to be fed, and she had not been there more than a few hours when this strange new desire took hold of her.

It was quite strange, and no one in the world could have been more surprised than she was, but she felt the urge to think. She had never felt that way before. Everything else that was easy to do, she had either wanted to do or had done at some point in her life, but she had never wanted to think until now. She had come to San Salvatore with the sole intention of lying around for four weeks in the sun, somewhere away from her parents and friends, lost in forgetfulness, only waking up to eat. Yet, she had been there for just a few hours when this strange new desire hit her.

There had been wonderful stars the evening before, and she had gone out into the top garden after dinner, leaving Mrs. Fisher alone over her nuts and wine, and, sitting on the wall at the place where the lilies crowded their ghost heads, she had looked out into the gulf of the night, and it had suddenly seemed as if her life had been a noise all about nothing.

There had been amazing stars the night before, and she had gone out into the upper garden after dinner, leaving Mrs. Fisher alone with her nuts and wine. Sitting on the wall where the lilies leaned with their ghostly heads, she had gazed into the depths of the night, and it suddenly felt like her life had been just a lot of noise about nothing.

She had been intensely surprised. She knew stars and darkness did produce unusual emotions because, in others, she had seen them being produced, but they had not before done it in herself. A noise all about nothing. Could she be quite well? She had wondered. For a long while past she had been aware that her life was a noise, but it had seemed to be very much about something; a noise, indeed, about so much that she felt she must get out of earshot for a little or she would be completely, and perhaps permanently, deafened. But suppose it was only a noise about nothing?

She was really surprised. She knew that stars and darkness could create strange emotions because she had seen them do it in others, but she had never experienced it herself before. It felt like a noise that was all about nothing. Could she be okay? She had been aware for a long time that her life was like a noise, but it had seemed to be about something important; a noise, really, about so much that she felt she needed to get away for a bit or she would be completely, maybe even permanently, deafened. But what if it was just a noise about nothing?

She had not had a question like that in her mind before. It had made her feel lonely. She wanted to be alone, but not lonely. That was very different; that was something that ached and hurt dreadfully right inside one. It was what one dreaded most. It was what made one go to so many parties; and lately even the parties had seemed once or twice not to be a perfectly certain protection. Was it possible that loneliness had nothing to do with circumstances, but only with the way one met them? Perhaps, she had thought, she had better go to bed. She couldn’t be very well.

She had never had a question like that before. It made her feel isolated. She wanted to be alone, but not feel lonely. That was a big difference; it was something that ached and hurt deeply inside. It was what one feared the most. It drove people to go to so many gatherings; and lately, even the gatherings had seemed, at times, not to be a guaranteed escape. Was it possible that loneliness had nothing to do with situations, but simply with how one faced them? Maybe, she thought, it would be best to go to bed. She wasn't feeling well.

She went to bed; and in the morning, after she had escaped the fly and had her breakfast and got out again into the garden, there was this same feeling again, and in broad daylight. Once more she had that really rather disgusting suspicion that her life till now had not only been loud but empty. Well, if that were so, and if her first twenty-eight years—the best ones—had gone just in meaningless noise, she had better stop a moment and look round her; pause, as they said in tiresome novels, and consider. She hadn’t got many sets of twenty-eight years. One more would see her growing very like Mrs. Fisher. Two more— She averted her eyes.

She went to bed, and in the morning, after avoiding the fly, having breakfast, and stepping back into the garden, she felt that same sensation again, now in bright daylight. Once more, she had that really quite unpleasant suspicion that her life up to this point had not only been loud but also empty. Well, if that was true, and if her first twenty-eight years—the best ones—had been filled with meaningless noise, she better take a moment to look around her; pause, as they say in boring novels, and reflect. She didn’t have many sets of twenty-eight years left. One more would see her becoming very much like Mrs. Fisher. Two more— She turned her gaze away.

Her mother would have been concerned if she had known. Her mother doted. Her father would have been concerned too, for he also doted. Everybody doted. And when, melodiously obstinate, she had insisted on going off to entomb herself in Italy for a whole month with queer people she had got out of an advertisement, refusing even to take her maid, the only explanation her friends could imagine was that poor Scrap—such was her name among them—had overdone it and was feeling a little nervy.

Her mom would have worried if she had known. Her mom was really fond of her. Her dad would have been worried too since he was also very loving. Everyone was. And when, stubbornly cheerful, she insisted on going off to bury herself in Italy for a whole month with some odd people she had found through an ad, refusing even to bring her maid, the only reason her friends could think of was that poor Scrap—what they called her—had pushed herself too hard and was feeling a bit anxious.

Her mother had been distressed at her departure. It was such an odd thing to do, such a sign of disappointment. She encouraged the general idea of the verge of a nervous breakdown. If she could have seen her adored Scrap, more delightful to look upon than any other mother’s daughter had ever yet been, the object of her utmost pride, the source of all her fondest hopes, sitting staring at the empty noonday Mediterranean considering her three possible sets of twenty-eight years, she would have been miserable. To go away alone was bad; to think was worse. No good could come out of the thinking of a beautiful young woman. Complications could come out of it in profusion, but no good. The thinking of the beautiful was bound to result in hesitations, in reluctances, in unhappiness all round. And here, if she could have seen her, sat her Scrap thinking quite hard. And such things. Such old things. Things nobody ever began to think till they were at least forty.

Her mom had been really upset about her leaving. It was such a strange thing to do, a clear sign of disappointment. She was practically on the verge of a nervous breakdown. If she could have seen her beloved Scrap, more beautiful than any other mother’s daughter ever had been, the absolute pride of her life, the reason for all her dreams, just sitting there staring at the empty midday Mediterranean and thinking about her three possible lives over the last twenty-eight years, it would have made her miserable. Going away alone was bad; thinking was worse. No good could come from a beautiful young woman’s thoughts. Complications could arise, but nothing good would result. The thoughts of someone beautiful were sure to lead to hesitations, reluctances, and unhappiness all around. And here, if she could have seen her, sat her Scrap deep in thought. And such things. Such old things. Things nobody started to think about until they were at least forty.

Chapter 9

That one of the two sitting-rooms which Mrs. Fisher had taken for her own was a room of charm and character. She surveyed it with satisfaction on going into it after breakfast, and was glad it was hers. It had a tiled floor, and walls the colour of pale honey, and inlaid furniture the colour of amber, and mellow books, many in ivory or lemon-coloured covers. There was a big window overlooking the sea towards Genoa, and a glass door through which she could proceed out on to the battlements and walk along past the quaint and attractive watch-tower, in itself a room with chairs and a writing table, to where on the other side of the tower the battlements ended in a marble seat, and one could see the western bay and the point round which began the Gulf of Spezia. Her south view, between these two stretches of sea, was another hill, higher than San Salvatore, the last of the little peninsula, with the bland turrets of a smaller and uninhabited castle on the top, on which the setting sun still shone when everything else was sunk in shadow. Yes, she was very comfortably established here; and receptacles—Mrs. Fisher did not examine their nature closely, but they seemed to be small stone troughs, or perhaps little sarcophagi—ringed round the battlements with flowers.

The sitting room that Mrs. Fisher had claimed for herself was full of charm and character. As she walked in after breakfast, she felt satisfied and happy it was hers. It had a tiled floor and walls the color of light honey, with amber-colored inlaid furniture and mellow books, many in ivory or lemon-colored covers. A large window overlooked the sea towards Genoa, and a glass door led out onto the battlements where she could stroll past the quaint and attractive watchtower, which was like a room with chairs and a writing desk, to where the battlements ended in a marble seat. From there, you could see the western bay and the point where the Gulf of Spezia began. Her view to the south, framed by these two stretches of sea, showcased another hill taller than San Salvatore, the last of the small peninsula, topped with the gentle turrets of a smaller, uninhabited castle, still lit by the setting sun while everything else was cloaked in shadow. Yes, she felt very comfortably settled here; and there were containers—Mrs. Fisher didn’t inspect them closely, but they looked like small stone troughs or maybe little sarcophagi—surrounded by flowers along the battlements.

These battlements, she thought, considering them, would have been a perfect place for her to pace up and down gently in moments when she least felt the need of her stick, or to sit in on the marble seat, having first put a cushion on it, if there had not unfortunately been a second glass door opening on to them, destroying their complete privacy, spoiling her feeling that the place was only for her. The second door belonged to the round drawing-room, which both she and Lady Caroline had rejected as too dark. That room would probably be sat in by the women from Hampstead, and she was afraid they would not confine themselves to sitting in it, but would come out through the glass door and invade her battlements. This would ruin the battlements. It would ruin them as far as she was concerned if they were to be overrun; or even if, not actually overrun, they were liable to be raked by the eyes of persons inside the room. No one could be perfectly at ease if they were being watched and knew it. What she wanted, what she surely had a right to, was privacy. She had no wish to intrude on the others; why then should they intrude on her? And she could always relax her privacy if, when she became better acquainted with her companions, she should think it worth while, but she doubted whether any of the three would so develop as to make her think it worth while.

She thought about the battlements and realized they would have been a perfect spot for her to wander gently when she didn’t feel the need for her cane or to sit on the marble seat after placing a cushion on it, if only there hadn’t been a second glass door that opened onto them, ruining her sense of complete privacy and the feeling that the place was just for her. The second door led to the round drawing-room, which both she and Lady Caroline had dismissed as too dark. That room would probably be occupied by the women from Hampstead, and she was worried they wouldn’t just stay in there but would come out through the glass door and invade her battlements. This would ruin the battlements for her. It would spoil them completely if they were overrun; or even if they weren't actually overrun, just being visible from inside the room would be enough to ruin it. No one could truly relax if they knew someone was watching them. What she wanted, what she absolutely deserved, was privacy. She had no desire to interrupt the others; so why should they interrupt her? And she could always lower her privacy later if, when she got to know her companions better, she felt it was worthwhile, but she doubted any of the three would become interesting enough for her to feel that way.

Hardly anything was really worth while, reflected Mrs. Fisher, except the past. It was astonishing, it was simply amazing, the superiority of the past to the present. Those friends of hers in London, solid persons of her own age, knew the same past that she knew, could talk about it with her, could compare it as she did with the tinkling present, and in remembering great men forget for a moment the trivial and barren young people who still, in spite of the war, seemed to litter the world in such numbers. She had not come away from these friends, these conversable ripe friends, in order to spend her time in Italy chatting with three persons of another generation and defective experience; she had come away merely to avoid the treacheries of a London April. It was true what she had told the two who came to Prince of Wales Terrace, that all she wished to do at San Salvatore was to sit by herself in the sun and remember. They knew this, for she had told them. It had been plainly expressed and clearly understood. Therefore she had a right to expect them to stay inside the round drawing-room and not to emerge interruptingly on to her battlements.

Hardly anything seemed really worthwhile, Mrs. Fisher thought, except for the past. It was astonishing, simply amazing, how much better the past was compared to the present. Those friends of hers in London, solid people her age, shared the same past she did; they could talk about it with her and compare it to the noisy present, and in reminiscing about great figures, they could momentarily forget the trivial and unremarkable young people who, despite the war, still appeared to clutter the world in such large numbers. She hadn't left those friends, those engaging peers, just to spend her time in Italy chatting with three people from a different generation with limited experiences; she had come away just to escape the unpredictability of a London April. It was true what she had told the two who had come to Prince of Wales Terrace, that all she wanted to do in San Salvatore was to sit by herself in the sun and remember. They knew this because she had said it. It had been clearly stated and understood. So, she had a right to expect them to stay inside the round drawing-room and not come outside to interrupt her on her battlements.

But would they? The doubt spoilt her morning. It was only towards lunch-time that she saw a way to be quite safe, and ringing for Francesca, bade her, in slow and majestic Italian, shut the shutters of the glass door of the round drawing-room, and then, going with her into the room, which had become darker than ever in consequence, but also, Mrs. Fisher observed to Francesca, who was being voluble, would because of this very darkness remain agreeably cool, and after all there were the numerous slit-windows in the walls to let in light and it was nothing to do with her if they did not let it in, she directed the placing of a cabinet of curios across the door on its inside.

But would they? The uncertainty ruined her morning. It wasn't until around lunchtime that she found a way to feel completely safe. She called for Francesca and instructed her, in slow and grand Italian, to close the shutters of the glass door in the round drawing-room. Then, she joined Francesca in the room, which had grown darker than ever as a result. However, Mrs. Fisher commented to Francesca, who was being chatty, that this darkness would actually help keep the room pleasantly cool. Besides, there were plenty of narrow windows in the walls to let in light, and it wasn’t her problem if they weren’t effective. She then instructed that a cabinet of curios be placed across the inside of the door.

This would discourage egress.

This would discourage leaving.

Then she rang for Domenico, and caused him to move one of the flower-filled sarcophagi across the door on its outside.

Then she called for Domenico and had him move one of the flower-filled sarcophagi outside the door.

This would discourage ingress.

This would discourage entry.

“No one,” said Domenico, hesitating, “will be able to use the door.”

“No one,” Domenico said, pausing, “will be able to use the door.”

“No one,” said Mrs. Fisher firmly, “will wish to.”

“No one,” Mrs. Fisher said firmly, “will want to.”

She then retired to her sitting-room, and from a chair placed where she could look straight on to them, gazed at her battlements, secured to her now completely, with calm pleasure.

She then went to her sitting room, and from a chair positioned so she could look directly at them, she gazed at her defenses, which were now completely secured, with a sense of calm pleasure.

Being here, she reflected placidly, was much cheaper than being in an hotel and, if she could keep off the others, immeasurably more agreeable. She was paying for her rooms—extremely pleasant rooms, now that she was arranged in them—£3 a week, which came to about eight shillings a day, battlements, watch-tower and all. Where else abroad could she live as well for so little, and have as many baths as she liked, for eight shillings a day? Of course she did not yet know what her food would cost, but she would insist on carefulness over that, though she would also insist on its being carefulness combined with excellence. The two were perfectly compatible if the caterer took pains. The servants’ wages, she had ascertained, were negligible, owing to the advantageous exchange, so that there was only the food to cause her anxiety. If she saw signs of extravagance she would propose that they each hand over a reasonable sum every week to Lady Caroline which should cover the bills, any of it that was not used to be returned, and if it were exceeded the loss to be borne by the caterer.

Being here, she thought calmly, was much cheaper than staying in a hotel and, if she could avoid the others, way more enjoyable. She was paying £3 a week for her rooms—really nice rooms, now that she was settled in— which came to about eight shillings a day, with battlements, watch-tower, and all. Where else abroad could she live so well for so little and have as many baths as she wanted for eight shillings a day? Of course, she didn't yet know what her food would cost, but she would make sure to be careful about that, while also demanding quality. The two could definitely go hand in hand if the caterer put in the effort. She had found out that the servants' wages were minimal, thanks to the favorable exchange rate, so her only worry was the food. If she noticed any signs of overspending, she would suggest that they each contribute a reasonable amount to Lady Caroline every week to cover the bills, with any leftover being returned, and if it went over, the caterer would have to take the loss.

Mrs. Fisher was well off and had the desire for comforts proper to her age, but she disliked expenses. So well off was she that, had she so chosen, she could have lived in an opulent part of London and driven from it and to it in a Rolls-Royce. She had no such wish. It needed more vitality than went with true comfort to deal with a house in an opulent spot and a Rolls-Royce. Worries attended such possessions, worries of every kind, crowned by bills. In the sober gloom of Prince of Wales Terrace she could obscurely enjoy inexpensive yet real comfort, without being snatched at by predatory men-servants or collectors for charities, and a taxi stand was at the end of the road. Her annual outlay was small. The house was inherited. Death had furnished it for her. She trod in the dining-room on the Turkey carpet of her fathers; she regulated her day by the excellent black marble clock on the mantelpiece which she remembered from childhood; her walls were entirely covered by the photographs her illustrious deceased friends had given either herself or her father, with their own handwriting across the lower parts of their bodies, and the windows, shrouded by the maroon curtains of all her life, were decorated besides with the selfsame aquariums to which she owed her first lessons in sealore, and in which still swam slowly the goldfishes of her youth.

Mrs. Fisher was well-off and desired the comforts appropriate for her age, but she didn't like to spend money. She was so well-off that if she wanted, she could have lived in a fancy part of London and driven around in a Rolls-Royce. But she had no interest in that. It took more energy than true comfort allowed to manage a house in a wealthy area and a Rolls-Royce. Such possessions came with all sorts of worries, especially financial ones. In the muted atmosphere of Prince of Wales Terrace, she could quietly enjoy affordable yet genuine comfort without being bothered by overly aggressive staff or charity collectors, and there was a taxi stand just down the street. Her annual expenses were minimal. She inherited the house. Death had furnished it for her. She walked on the Turkey carpet in the dining room that belonged to her father; she kept time by the beautiful black marble clock on the mantelpiece that she remembered from childhood; her walls were completely filled with photographs from her famous deceased friends, each with their own handwriting at the bottom, and the windows, draped with the maroon curtains she’d had all her life, were also adorned with the same aquariums that had given her her first lessons in marine life, where the goldfish of her youth still swam slowly.

Were they the same goldfish? She did not know. Perhaps, like carp, they outlived everybody. Perhaps, on the other hand, behind the deep-sea vegetation provided for them at the bottom, they had from time to time as the years went by withdrawn and replaced themselves. Were they or were they not, she sometimes wondered, contemplating them between the courses of her solitary meals, the same goldfish that had that day been there when Carlyle—how well she remembered it—angrily strode up to them in the middle of some argument with her father that had grown heated, and striking the glass smartly with his fist had put them to flight, shouting as they fled, “Och, ye deaf deevils! Och, ye lucky deaf deevils! Ye can’t hear anything of the blasted, blethering, doddering, glaikit fool-stuff yer maister talks, can ye?” Or words to that effect.

Were they the same goldfish? She didn't know. Maybe, like carp, they lived longer than everyone else. Or maybe, as the years passed, they occasionally swapped themselves out behind the underwater plants at the bottom. She sometimes wondered, while she was eating alone, if they were the same goldfish that had been there the day Carlyle—she remembered it so well—angrily walked up to them during a heated argument with her dad, and after striking the glass firmly with his fist, scared them away while shouting, “Oh, you deaf devils! Oh, you lucky deaf devils! You can’t hear a thing of the blasted, rambling, foolish nonsense your master talks, can you?” Or something like that.

Dear, great-souled Carlyle. Such natural gushings forth; such true freshness; such real grandeur. Rugged, if you will—yes, undoubtedly sometimes rugged, and startling in a drawing-room, but magnificent. Who was there now to put beside him? Who was there to mention in the same breath? Her father, than whom no one had had more flair, said: “Thomas is immortal.” And here was this generation, this generation of puniness, raising its little voice in doubts, or, still worse, not giving itself the trouble to raise it at all, not—it was incredible, but it had been thus reported to her—even reading him. Mrs. Fisher did not read him either, but that was different. She had read him; she had certainly read him. Of course she had read him. There was Teufelsdröck—she quite well remembered a tailor called Teufelsdröck. So like Carlyle to call him that. Yes, she must have read him, though naturally details escaped her.

Dear, great-souled Carlyle. Such genuine enthusiasm; such true freshness; such real greatness. Rugged, if you want—yes, definitely sometimes rugged and surprising in a drawing room, but magnificent. Who could compare to him now? Who could even be mentioned in the same breath? Her father, who had more style than anyone, said: “Thomas is immortal.” And here was this generation, this generation of weakness, raising its tiny voice in doubt, or even worse, not bothering to raise it at all. It was unbelievable, but she had been told that some even hadn’t read him. Mrs. Fisher hadn’t read him either, but that was different. She had read him; she had definitely read him. Of course, she had read him. There was Teufelsdröck—she remembered a tailor named Teufelsdröck well. So like Carlyle to name him that. Yes, she must have read him, though naturally the details had slipped her mind.

The gong sounded. Lost in reminiscence Mrs. Fisher had forgotten time, and hastened to her bedroom to wash her hands and smoothe her hair. She did not wish to be late and set a bad example, and perhaps find her seat at the head of the table taken. One could put no trust in the manners of the younger generation; especially not in those of that Mrs. Wilkins.

The gong went off. Caught up in her thoughts, Mrs. Fisher lost track of time and rushed to her bedroom to wash her hands and fix her hair. She didn’t want to be late and set a bad example, and she was worried that someone might take her seat at the head of the table. You couldn’t trust the manners of the younger generation, especially not those of that Mrs. Wilkins.

She was, however, the first to arrive in the dining-room. Francesca in a white apron stood ready with an enormous dish of smoking hot, glistening maccaroni, but nobody was there to eat it.

She was, however, the first to arrive in the dining room. Francesca in a white apron stood ready with a huge dish of steaming, shiny macaroni, but nobody was there to eat it.

Mrs. Fisher sat down, looking stern. Lax, lax.

Mrs. Fisher sat down, looking serious. Lax, lax.

“Serve me,” she said to Francesca, who showed a disposition to wait for the others.

“Serve me,” she said to Francesca, who seemed willing to wait for the others.

Francesca served her. Of the party she liked Mrs. Fisher least, in fact she did not like her at all. She was the only one of the four ladies who had not yet smiled. True she was old, true she was unbeautiful, true she therefore had no reason to smile, but kind ladies smiled, reason or no. They smiled, not because they were happy but because they wished to make happy. This one of the four ladies could not then, Francesca decided, be kind; so she handed her the maccaroni, being unable to hide any of her feelings, morosely.

Francesca served her. Of the group, she liked Mrs. Fisher the least; in fact, she didn't like her at all. She was the only one of the four women who hadn't smiled yet. It was true that she was old and not attractive, and because of that, she had no reason to smile, but kind people smiled, regardless of their circumstances. They smiled, not because they were happy, but because they wanted to make others happy. This woman, out of the four, definitely couldn’t be kind, Francesca decided, so she handed her the macaroni, unable to hide her feelings, and doing so sulkily.

It was very well cooked, but Mrs. Fisher had never cared for maccaroni, especially not this long, worm-shaped variety. She found it difficult to eat—slippery, wriggling off her fork, making her look, she felt, undignified when, having got it as she supposed into her mouth, ends of it yet hung out. Always, too, when she ate it she was reminded of Mr. Fisher. He had during their married life behaved very much like maccaroni. He had slipped, he had wriggled, he had made her feel undignified, and when at last she had got him safe, as she thought, there had invariably been little bits of him that still, as it were, hung out.

It was cooked perfectly, but Mrs. Fisher never liked macaroni, especially not this long, worm-like kind. She found it hard to eat—slippery, slipping off her fork, which made her feel undignified, especially when she thought she had it in her mouth, yet some ends still hung out. Plus, every time she ate it, she was reminded of Mr. Fisher. Throughout their marriage, he had acted very much like macaroni. He had slipped away, wriggled out of her grasp, made her feel undignified, and when she finally thought she had him secured, there were always little pieces of him that still, so to speak, hung out.

Francesca from the sideboard watched Mrs. Fisher’s way with maccaroni gloomily, and her gloom deepened when she saw her at last take her knife to it and chop it small.

Francesca watched Mrs. Fisher’s method of preparing macaroni from the sideboard with a frown, and her frown deepened when she finally saw her take a knife to it and chop it into small pieces.

Mrs. Fisher really did not know how else to get hold of the stuff. She was aware that knives in this connection were improper, but one did finally lose patience. Maccaroni was never allowed to appear on her table in London. Apart from its tiresomeness she did not even like it, and she would tell Lady Caroline not to order it again. Years of practice, reflected Mrs. Fisher, chopping it up, years of actual living in Italy, would be necessary to learn the exact trick. Browning managed maccaroni wonderfully. She remembered watching him one day when he came to lunch with her father, and a dish of it had been ordered as a compliment to his connection with Italy. Fascinating, the way it went in. No chasing round the plate, no slidings off the fork, no subsequent protrusions of loose ends—just one dig, one whisk, one thrust, one gulp, and lo, yet another poet had been nourished.

Mrs. Fisher really didn’t know how else to get the stuff. She knew that using knives was inappropriate in this case, but eventually, one loses patience. Macaroni was never allowed on her table in London. Besides being tiresome, she didn't even like it, and she would tell Lady Caroline not to order it again. Mrs. Fisher thought that years of practice chopping it up, along with actual living in Italy, would be necessary to learn the right technique. Browning handled macaroni beautifully. She remembered watching him one day when he came to lunch with her father, and a dish of it had been ordered as a nod to his connection with Italy. It was fascinating how it went in. No chasing around the plate, no slipping off the fork, no loose ends sticking out—just one poke, one whisk, one thrust, one gulp, and look, yet another poet had been fed.

“Shall I go and seek the young lady?” asked Francesca, unable any longer to look on a good maccaroni being cut with a knife.

“Should I go find the young lady?” Francesca asked, unable to keep watching a nice piece of macaroni being cut with a knife.

Mrs. Fisher came out of her reminiscent reflections with difficulty. “She knows lunch is at half-past twelve,” she said. “They all know.”

Mrs. Fisher struggled to pull herself out of her nostalgic thoughts. “She knows lunch is at 12:30,” she said. “They all know.”

“She may be asleep,” said Francesca. “The other ladies are further away, but this one is not far away.”

“She might be asleep,” said Francesca. “The other ladies are farther away, but this one is close by.”

“Beat the gong again then,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Ring the gong again then,” said Mrs. Fisher.

What manners, she thought; what, what manners. It was not an hotel, and considerations were due. She must say she was surprised at Mrs. Arbuthnot, who had not looked like somebody unpunctual. Lady Caroline, too—she had seemed amiable and courteous, whatever else she might be. From the other one, of course, she expected nothing.

What manners, she thought; what, what manners. It wasn't a hotel, and proper behavior was expected. She had to admit she was surprised by Mrs. Arbuthnot, who hadn’t seemed like someone who was late. Lady Caroline, too—she had come across as friendly and polite, no matter what else she might be. From the other one, of course, she expected nothing.

Francesca fetched the gong, and took it out into the garden and advanced, beating it as she advanced, close up to Lady Caroline, who, still stretched in her low chair, waited till she had done, and then turned her head and in the sweetest tones poured forth what appeared to be music but was really invective.

Francesca grabbed the gong and carried it out to the garden, striking it as she walked closer to Lady Caroline, who was still lounging in her low chair. Once Francesca finished, Lady Caroline turned her head and, in the sweetest tones, let out what sounded like music but was actually sharp criticism.

Francesca did not recognise the liquid flow as invective; how was she to, when it came out sounding like that? And with her face all smiles, for she could not but smile when she looked at this young lady, she told her the maccaroni was getting cold.

Francesca didn't see the liquid flow as harsh criticism; how could she when it sounded like that? And with a beaming smile on her face, because she couldn't help but smile when she looked at this young lady, she told her that the macaroni was getting cold.

“When I do not come to meals it is because I do not wish to come to meals,” said the irritated Scrap, “and you will not in future disturb me.”

“When I skip meals, it’s because I don’t want to eat,” said the annoyed Scrap, “and don’t bother me about it in the future.”

“Is she ill?” asked Francesca, sympathetic but unable to stop smiling. Never, never had she seen hair so beautiful. Like pure flax; like the hair of northern babes. On such a little head only blessing could rest, on such a little head the nimbus of the holiest saints could fitly be placed.

“Is she sick?” Francesca asked, sympathetic but unable to stop smiling. Never, ever had she seen hair so beautiful. Like pure flax; like the hair of northern babies. On such a tiny head only blessings could rest, on such a tiny head the halo of the holiest saints could perfectly fit.

Scrap shut her eyes and refused to answer. In this she was injudicious, for its effect was to convince Francesca, who hurried away full of concern to tell Mrs. Fisher, that she was indisposed. And Mrs. Fisher, being prevented, she explained, from going out to Lady Caroline herself because of her stick, sent the two others instead, who had come in at that moment heated and breathless and full of excuses, while she herself proceeded to the next course, which was a very well-made omelette, bursting most agreeably at both its ends with young green peas.

Scrap shut her eyes and refused to answer. This was not a smart move, as it convinced Francesca, who rushed off worried to tell Mrs. Fisher, that Scrap was unwell. And since Mrs. Fisher couldn’t go to Lady Caroline herself because of her cane, she sent the other two instead, who had just come in, hot and out of breath, full of apologies. Meanwhile, she moved on to the next dish, which was a perfectly made omelette, pleasantly bursting at both ends with young green peas.

“Serve me,” she directed Francesca, who again showed a disposition to wait for the others.

“Serve me,” she told Francesca, who still seemed inclined to wait for the others.

Oh, why won’t they leave me alone?—oh, why won’t they leave me alone?” Scrap asked herself when she heard more scrunchings on the little pebbles which took the place of grass, and therefore knew some one else was approaching.

Oh, why won’t they leave me alone?—oh, why won’t they leave me alone?” Scrap asked herself when she heard more scrunching on the little pebbles that replaced the grass, and so she knew someone else was coming.

She kept her eyes tight shut this time. Why should she go in to lunch if she didn’t want to? This wasn’t a private house; she was in no way tangled up in duties towards a tiresome hostess. For all practical purposes San Salvatore was an hotel, and she ought to be let alone to eat or not to eat exactly as if she really had been in an hotel.

She kept her eyes tightly shut this time. Why should she go to lunch if she didn’t want to? This wasn’t someone’s home; she wasn’t obligated to deal with a bothersome hostess. For all intents and purposes, San Salvatore was a hotel, and she should be left alone to eat or skip the meal just as if she were actually in a hotel.

But the unfortunate Scrap could not just sit still and close her eyes without rousing that desire to stroke and pet in her beholders with which she was only too familiar. Even the cook had patted her. And now a gentle hand—how well she knew and how much she dreaded gentle hands—was placed on her forehead.

But the poor Scrap couldn’t just sit still and close her eyes without getting that urge to be stroked and petted by the people around her that she knew all too well. Even the cook had given her a pat. And now a gentle hand—how well she recognized it and how much she feared gentle hands—was resting on her forehead.

“I’m afraid you’re not well,” said a voice that was not Mrs. Fisher’s, and therefore must belong to one of the originals.

“I’m worried you’re not feeling well,” said a voice that wasn’t Mrs. Fisher’s, and so it must belong to one of the original members.

“I have a headache,” murmured Scrap. Perhaps it was best to say that; perhaps it was the shortest cut to peace.

“I have a headache,” whispered Scrap. Maybe it was best to say that; maybe it was the quickest way to calm.

“I’m so sorry,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot softly, for it was her hand being gentle.

“I’m really sorry,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said softly, because it was her hand being gentle.

“And I,” said Scrap to herself, “who thought if I came here I would escape mothers.”

“And I,” Scrap said to herself, “who thought if I came here I would get away from moms.”

“Don’t you think some tea would do you good?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot tenderly.

“Don’t you think some tea would make you feel better?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot gently.

Tea? The idea was abhorrent to Scrap. In this heat to be drinking tea in the middle of the day. . .

Tea? The thought was disgusting to Scrap. Drinking tea in the middle of the day in this heat...

“No,” she murmured.

“No,” she whispered.

“I expect what would really be best for her,” said another voice, “is to be left quiet.”

“I think what would really be best for her,” said another voice, “is to be left alone.”

How sensible, thought Scrap; and raised the eye-lashes of one eye just enough to peep through and see who was speaking.

How clever, thought Scrap; and he lifted one eyelash just enough to peek through and see who was talking.

It was the freckled original. The dark one, then, was the one with the hand. The freckled one rose in her esteem.

It was the freckled original. The dark one, then, was the one with the hand. The freckled one grew in her respect.

“But I can’t bear to think of you with a headache and nothing being done for it,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “Would a cup of strong black coffee—?”

“But I can’t stand the thought of you having a headache and not doing anything about it,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “How about a strong cup of black coffee—?”

Scrap said no more. She waited, motionless and dumb, till Mrs. Arbuthnot should remove her hand. After all, she couldn’t stand there all day, and when she went away she would have to take her hand with her.

Scrap said nothing more. She waited, still and silent, until Mrs. Arbuthnot removed her hand. After all, she couldn’t just stand there all day, and when she left, she would have to take her hand with her.

“I do think,” said the freckled one, “that she wants nothing except quiet.”

“I really think,” said the freckled one, “that she wants nothing but peace and quiet.”

And perhaps the freckled one pulled the one with the hand by the sleeve, for the hold on Scrap’s forehead relaxed, and after a minute’s silence, during which no doubt she was being contemplated—she was always being contemplated—the footsteps began to scrunch the pebbles again, and grew fainter, and were gone.

And maybe the one with freckles tugged on the one with the hand by the sleeve, because the grip on Scrap’s forehead loosened. After a minute of silence, during which she was probably being stared at—she always was—the footsteps started crunching the pebbles again, became quieter, and eventually disappeared.

“Lady Caroline has a headache,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, re-entering the dining-room and sitting down in her place next to Mrs. Fisher. “I can’t persuade her to have even a little tea, or some black coffee. Do you know what aspirin is in Italian?”

“Lady Caroline has a headache,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said as she walked back into the dining room and sat down next to Mrs. Fisher. “I can’t get her to drink even a little tea or some black coffee. Do you know how to say aspirin in Italian?”

“The proper remedy for headaches,” said Mrs. Fisher firmly, “is castor oil.”

“The best cure for headaches,” Mrs. Fisher said confidently, “is castor oil.”

“But she hasn’t got a headache,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“But she doesn’t have a headache,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“Carlyle,” said Mrs. Fisher, who had finished her omelette and had leisure, while she waited for the next course, to talk, “suffered at one period terribly from headaches, and he constantly took castor oil as a remedy. He took it, I should say, almost to excess, and called it, I remember, in his interesting way the oil of sorrow. My father said it coloured for a time his whole attitude to life, his whole philosophy. But that was because he took too much. What Lady Caroline wants is one dose, and one only. It is a mistake to keep on taking castor oil.”

“Carlyle,” said Mrs. Fisher, who had finished her omelet and had the time to chat while waiting for the next course, “went through a phase of terrible headaches, and he often took castor oil as a remedy. I’d say he took it almost to excess, and he referred to it, as I remember, in his unique way as the oil of sorrow. My father said it affected his entire outlook on life and his whole philosophy for a while. But that was because he took too much. What Lady Caroline needs is just one dose, and only one. It's a mistake to keep taking castor oil.”

“Do you know the Italian for it?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Do you know how to say it in Italian?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Ah, that I’m afraid I don’t. However, she would know. You can ask her.”

“Ah, I’m afraid I don’t. But she would know. You can ask her.”

“But she hasn’t got a headache,” repeated Mrs. Wilkins, who was struggling with the maccaroni. “She only wants to be let alone.”

“But she doesn’t have a headache,” repeated Mrs. Wilkins, who was struggling with the macaroni. “She just wants to be left alone.”

They both looked at her. The word shovel crossed Mrs. Fisher’s mind in connection with Mrs. Wilkins’s actions at that moment.

They both stared at her. The word shovel popped into Mrs. Fisher’s mind in relation to Mrs. Wilkins’s actions at that moment.

“Then why should she say she has?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“Then why should she say she has?” Mrs. Arbuthnot asked.

“Because she is still trying to be polite. Soon she won’t try, when the place has got more into her—she’ll really be it. Without trying. Naturally.”

“Because she’s still trying to be polite. Soon she won’t bother when the place has become a part of her—she’ll just be it. Effortlessly. Naturally.”

“Lotty, you see,” explained Mrs. Arbuthnot, smiling to Mrs. Fisher, who sat waiting with a stony patience for her next course, delayed because Mrs. Wilkins would go on trying to eat the maccaroni, which must be less worth eating than ever now that it was cold; “Lotty, you see, has a theory about this place—”

“Lotty, you see,” Mrs. Arbuthnot explained, smiling at Mrs. Fisher, who sat waiting with a stony patience for her next course, delayed because Mrs. Wilkins kept trying to eat the cold macaroni, which must be less appealing now that it was cold; “Lotty, you see, has a theory about this place—”

But Mrs. Fisher had no wish to hear any theory of Mrs. Wilkins’s.

But Mrs. Fisher didn't want to hear any theories from Mrs. Wilkins.

“I am sure I don’t know,” she interrupted, looking severely at Mrs. Wilkins, “why you should assume Lady Caroline is not telling the truth.”

“I really don’t understand,” she interrupted, giving Mrs. Wilkins a hard look, “why you think Lady Caroline isn’t being truthful.”

“I don’t assume—I know,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“I don’t assume—I know,” Mrs. Wilkins said.

“And pray how do you know?” asked Mrs. Fisher icily, for Mrs. Wilkins was actually helping herself to more maccaroni, offered her officiously and unnecessarily a second time by Francesca.

“And how do you know that?” asked Mrs. Fisher coldly, as Mrs. Wilkins was actually helping herself to more macaroni, which Francesca was offering her again in a busybody manner.

“When I was out there just now I saw inside her.”

"When I was out there just now, I saw into her."

Well, Mrs. Fisher wasn’t going to say anything to that; she wasn’t going to trouble to reply to downright idiocy. Instead she sharply rapped the little table-gong by her side, though there was Francesca standing at the sideboard, and said, for she would wait no longer for her next course, “Serve me.”

Well, Mrs. Fisher wasn’t going to say anything in response; she wasn’t going to waste her breath on pure nonsense. Instead, she sharply struck the little table bell next to her, even with Francesca standing at the sideboard, and said, since she wasn’t going to wait any longer for her next course, “Serve me.”

And Francesca—it must have been wilful—offered her the maccaroni again.

And Francesca—she must have done it on purpose—offered her the macaroni again.

Chapter 10

There was no way of getting into or out of the top garden at San Salvatore except through the two glass doors, unfortunately side by side, of the dining-room and the hall. A person in the garden who wished to escape unseen could not, for the person to be escaped from would be met on the way. It was a small, oblong garden, and concealment was impossible. What trees there were—the Judas tree, the tamarisk, the umbrella-pine—grew close to the low parapets. Rose bushes gave no real cover; one step to right or left of them, and the person wishing to be private was discovered. Only the north-west corner was a little place jutting out from the great wall, a kind of excrescence or loop, no doubt used in the old distrustful days for observation, where it was possible to sit really unseen, because between it and the house was a thick clump of daphne.

There was no way to get in or out of the top garden at San Salvatore except through the two glass doors, which were unfortunately side by side, in the dining room and the hall. Anyone in the garden wanting to leave without being seen couldn't do so, as they would encounter the person they were trying to avoid. It was a small, rectangular garden, and hiding was impossible. The few trees—a Judas tree, tamarisk, and umbrella pine—were close to the low walls. Rose bushes offered no real cover; taking a step to the right or left would reveal anyone trying to be private. Only the north-west corner jutted out from the main wall, a sort of odd extension that was probably used in the old days for observing others, where it was possible to sit completely unseen because there was a thick group of daphne between it and the house.

Scrap, after glancing round to see that no one was looking, got up and carried her chair into this place, stealing away as carefully on tiptoe as those steal whose purpose is sin. There was another excrescence on the walls just like it at the north-east corner, but this, though the view from it was almost more beautiful, for from it you could see the bay and the lovely mountains behind Mezzago, was exposed. No bushes grew near it, nor had it any shade. The north-west loop then was where she would sit, and she settled into it, and nestling her head in her cushion and putting her feet comfortably on the parapet, from whence they appeared to the villagers on the piazza below as two white doves, thought that now indeed she would be safe.

Scrap, glancing around to make sure no one was watching, got up and quietly moved her chair into this spot, sneaking away carefully on tiptoe like someone up to no good. There was another bump on the walls just like it at the northeast corner, but this one, although the view from it was nearly more beautiful—because you could see the bay and the stunning mountains behind Mezzago—was out in the open. No bushes grew nearby, and it didn’t have any shade. So, the northwest nook was where she decided to sit. She settled in, nestled her head into her cushion, and comfortably placed her feet on the parapet, which made them look to the villagers in the piazza below like two white doves, thinking that now she would truly be safe.

Mrs. Fisher found her there, guided by the smell of her cigarette. The incautious Scrap had not thought of that. Mrs. Fisher did not smoke herself, and all the more distinctly could she smell the smoke of others. The virile smell met her directly she went out into the garden from the dining-room after lunch in order to have her coffee. She had bidden Francesca set the coffee in the shade of the house just outside the glass door, and when Mrs. Wilkins, seeing a table being carried there, reminded her, very officiously and tactlessly Mrs. Fisher considered, that Lady Caroline wanted to be alone, she retorted—and with what propriety—that the garden was for everybody.

Mrs. Fisher found her there, guided by the smell of her cigarette. The careless Scrap hadn't thought of that. Mrs. Fisher didn’t smoke herself, so she could smell other people’s smoke even more clearly. The strong smell hit her as soon as she stepped out into the garden from the dining room after lunch to have her coffee. She had asked Francesca to set up the coffee in the shade of the house just outside the glass door, and when Mrs. Wilkins, noticing a table being carried there, reminded her—very officiously and awkwardly, Mrs. Fisher thought—that Lady Caroline wanted to be alone, she shot back—and with perfect propriety—that the garden was for everyone.

Into it accordingly she went, and was immediately aware that Lady Caroline was smoking. She said to herself, “These modern young women,” and proceeded to find her; her stick, now that lunch was over, being no longer the hindrance to action that it was before her meal had been securely, as Browning once said—surely it was Browning? Yes, she remembered how much diverted she had been—roped in.

Into it she went, and immediately noticed that Lady Caroline was smoking. She thought to herself, “These modern young women,” and went to find her; her stick, now that lunch was over, was no longer the obstacle it had been before her meal had been securely, as Browning once said—was it Browning? Yes, she remembered how amused she had been—roped in.

Nobody diverted her now, reflected Mrs. Fisher, making straight for the clump of daphne; the world had grown very dull, and had entirely lost its sense of humour. Probably they still had their jokes, these people—in fact she knew they did, for Punch still went on; but how differently it went on, and what jokes. Thackeray, in his inimitable way, would have made mincemeat of this generation. Of how much it needed the tonic properties of that astringent pen it was of course unaware. It no longer even held him—at least, so she had been informed—in any particular esteem. Well, she could not give it eyes to see and ears to hear and a heart to understand, but she could and would give it, represented and united in the form of Lady Caroline, a good dose of honest medicine.

Nobody was getting in her way now, Mrs. Fisher thought, heading straight for the daphne bushes; the world had become really boring and had completely lost its sense of humor. They probably still had their jokes, these people—in fact, she knew they did, since Punch was still around; but it was all different now, and what jokes they had. Thackeray, in his unique way, would have torn this generation apart. It was completely unaware of how much it needed the sharp edge of his pen. Apparently, it no longer even regarded him—at least, that’s what she had heard—with any real respect. Well, she couldn’t give it the ability to see, hear, and understand, but she could and would provide it, personified in Lady Caroline, with a good dose of honest medicine.

“I hear you are not well,” she said, standing in the narrow entrance of the loop and looking down with the inflexible face of one who is determined to do good at the motionless and apparently sleeping Scrap.

“I hear you’re not feeling well,” she said, standing in the narrow entrance of the loop and looking down with the serious expression of someone determined to help the still and seemingly sleeping Scrap.

Mrs. Fisher had a deep voice, very like a man’s, for she had been overtaken by that strange masculinity that sometimes pursues a woman during the last laps of her life.

Mrs. Fisher had a deep voice, quite similar to a man’s, as she had been caught up in that unusual masculinity that sometimes follows a woman in the later stages of her life.

Scrap tried to pretend that she was asleep, but if she had been her cigarette would not have been held in her fingers but would have been lying on the ground.

Scrap tried to act like she was asleep, but if she really was, her cigarette wouldn’t be in her fingers; it would be lying on the ground.

She forgot this. Mrs. Fisher did not, and coming inside the loop, sat down on a narrow stone seat built out of the wall. For a little she could sit on it; for a little, till the chill began to penetrate.

She forgot this. Mrs. Fisher didn’t, and as she came inside the loop, she sat down on a narrow stone seat that was built into the wall. She could sit on it for a little while; for a little while, until the chill started to seep in.

She contemplated the figure before her. Undoubtedly a pretty creature, and one that would have had a success at Farringford. Strange how easily even the greatest men were moved by exteriors. She had seen with her own eyes Tennyson turn away from everybody—turn, positively, his back on a crowd of eminent people assembled to do him honour, and withdraw to the window with a young person nobody had ever heard of, who had been brought there by accident and whose one and only merit—if it be a merit, that which is conferred by chance—was beauty. Beauty! All over before you can turn round. An affair, one might almost say, of minutes. Well, while it lasted it did seem able to do what it liked with men. Even husbands were not immune. There had been passages in the life of Mr. Fisher . . .

She looked at the figure in front of her. Definitely a pretty person, someone who would have stood out at Farringford. It's strange how easily even the greatest men are swayed by appearances. She had witnessed Tennyson himself turn away from everyone—actually turning his back on a crowd of distinguished people gathered to honor him, and retreating to the window with a young woman no one had ever heard of, who had ended up there by chance and whose only quality—if you can call it a quality, the one given by luck—was her looks. Beauty! It’s gone before you know it. It’s almost a matter of minutes. Well, while it lasts, it really seems to have the power to do whatever it wants with men. Even husbands aren’t exempt. There had been episodes in Mr. Fisher's life...

“I expect the journey has upset you,” she said in her deep voice. “What you want is a good dose of some simple medicine. I shall ask Domenico if there is such a thing in the village as castor oil.”

“I expect the journey has upset you,” she said in her deep voice. “What you need is a good dose of some simple medicine. I’ll ask Domenico if there’s anything like castor oil in the village.”

Scrap opened her eyes and looked straight at Mrs. Fisher.

Scrap opened her eyes and gazed directly at Mrs. Fisher.

“Ah,” said Mrs. Fisher, “I knew you were not asleep. If you had been you would have let your cigarette fall to the ground.”

“Ah,” said Mrs. Fisher, “I knew you weren’t asleep. If you were, you would have dropped your cigarette on the ground.”

Scrap threw the cigarette over the parapet.

Scrap tossed the cigarette over the ledge.

“Waste,” said Mrs. Fisher. “I don’t like smoking for women, but I still less like waste.”

“Waste,” said Mrs. Fisher. “I’m not a fan of women smoking, but I definitely dislike waste even more.”

“What does one do with people like this?” Scrap asked herself, her eyes fixed on Mrs. Fisher in what felt to her an indignant stare but appeared to Mrs. Fisher as really charming docility.

“What does one do with people like this?” Scrap wondered, her eyes locked on Mrs. Fisher in what felt like an indignant glare but came off to Mrs. Fisher as genuinely charming submission.

“Now you’ll take my advice,” said Mrs. Fisher, touched, “and not neglect what may very well turn into an illness. We are in Italy, you know, and one has to be careful. You ought, to begin with, to go to bed.”

“Now you’re going to take my advice,” said Mrs. Fisher, feeling concerned, “and not overlook what could easily become an illness. We’re in Italy, you know, and you have to be cautious. You should, to start with, go to bed.”

“I never go to bed,” snapped Scrap; and it sounded as moving, as forlorn, as that line spoken years and years ago by an actress playing the part of Poor Jo in dramatised version of Bleak House—“I’m always moving on,” said Poor Jo in this play, urged to do so by a policeman; and Mrs. Fisher, then a girl, had laid her head on the red velvet parapet of the front row of the dress circle and wept aloud.

“I never go to bed,” snapped Scrap; and it sounded just as powerful, just as sad, as that line spoken years ago by an actress playing Poor Jo in the dramatized version of Bleak House—“I’m always moving on,” said Poor Jo in this play, urged to do so by a policeman; and Mrs. Fisher, who was a girl at the time, had laid her head on the red velvet railing of the front row of the dress circle and wept aloud.

It was wonderful, Scrap’s voice. It had given her, in the ten years since she came out, all the triumphs that intelligence and wit can have, because it made whatever she said seem memorable. She ought, with a throat formation like that, to have been a singer, but in every kind of music Scrap was dumb except this one music of the speaking voice; and what a fascination, what a spell lay in that. Such was the loveliness of her face and the beauty of her colouring that there was not a man into whose eyes at the sight of her there did not leap a flame of intensest interest; but, when he heard her voice, the flame in that man’s eyes was caught and fixed. It was the same with every man, educated and uneducated, old, young, desirable themselves or undesirable, men of her own world and bus-conductors, generals and Tommies—during the war she had had a perplexing time—bishops equally with vergers—round about her confirmation startling occurrences had taken place—wholesome and unwholesome, rich and penniless, brilliant or idiotic; and it made no difference at all what they were, or how long and securely married: into the eyes of every one of them, when they saw her, leapt this flame, and when they heard her it stayed there.

It was incredible, Scrap's voice. In the ten years since she came out, it had given her all the triumphs that intelligence and wit can bring because it made everything she said memorable. With a throat like that, she should have been a singer, but she was tone-deaf to every kind of music except for the music of her speaking voice; and what a charm, what a spell it had. Her face was lovely, and her complexion was beautiful, so there wasn't a man who didn't feel a spark of intense interest when he saw her; but when he heard her voice, that spark was captured and held. It was the same for every man—educated and uneducated, young and old, desirable or not, men from her own social circle, bus conductors, generals, and soldiers. During the war, she had quite a confusing experience—bishops alongside vergers—startling events had occurred around her confirmation—wholesome and unwholesome, rich and poor, brilliant or foolish; it didn’t matter who they were or how long they had been married: in the eyes of every one of them, when they saw her, that spark leaped, and when they heard her, it stayed there.

Scrap had had enough of this look. It only led to difficulties. At first it had delighted her. She had been excited, triumphant. To be apparently incapable of doing or saying the wrong thing, to be applauded, listened to, petted, adored wherever she went, and when she came home to find nothing there either but the most indulgent proud fondness—why, how extremely pleasant. And so easy, too. No preparation necessary for this achievement, no hard work, nothing to learn. She need take no trouble. She had only to appear, and presently say something.

Scrap was fed up with that look. It only brought problems. At first, it had thrilled her. She had felt excited and triumphant. Being seemingly incapable of doing or saying anything wrong, receiving applause, being listened to, pampered, and adored wherever she went, and coming home to nothing but the most indulgent and proud affection—how incredibly nice. And so effortless, too. No preparation was needed for this success, no hard work, nothing to learn. She didn't have to stress. She just had to show up and eventually say something.

But gradually experiences gathered round her. After all, she had to take trouble, she had to make efforts, because, she discovered with astonishment and rage, she had to defend herself. That look, that leaping look, meant that she was going to be grabbed at. Some of those who had it were more humble than others, especially if they were young, but they all, according to their several ability, grabbed; and she who had entered the world so jauntily, with her head in the air and the completest confidence in anybody whose hair was grey, began to distrust, and then to dislike, and soon to shrink away from, and presently to be indignant. Sometimes it was just as if she didn’t belong to herself, wasn’t her own at all, but was regarded as a universal thing, a sort of beauty-of-all-work. Really men . . . And she found herself involved in , vague quarrels, being curiously hated. Really women . . . And when the war came, and she flung herself into it along with everybody else, it finished her. Really generals . . .

But over time, experiences piled up around her. After all, she had to put in the effort, she had to make an effort, because, to her shock and anger, she realized she had to defend herself. That look, that intense stare, meant that someone was going to reach for her. Some of those who had it were more humble than others, especially if they were young, but they all, in their own way, reached out; and she, who had entered the world so confidently, with her head held high and complete trust in anyone with gray hair, began to feel distrust, then dislike, and soon she started to withdraw, and eventually became indignant. Sometimes it felt as if she didn’t belong to herself, wasn’t her own at all, but was seen as a universal object, a kind of everyone’s beauty. Really men . . . And she found herself caught up in vague conflicts, being strangely hated. Really women . . . And when the war came, and she threw herself into it just like everyone else, it changed everything for her. Really generals . . .

The war finished Scrap. It killed the one man she felt safe with, whom she would have married, and it finally disgusted her with love. Since then she had been embittered. She was struggling as angrily in the sweet stuff of life as a wasp got caught in honey. Just as desperately did she try to unstick her wings. It gave her no pleasure to outdo other women; she didn’t want their tiresome men. What could one do with men when one had got them? None of them would talk to her of anything but the things of love, and how foolish and fatiguing that became after a bit. It was as though a healthy person with a normal hunger was given nothing whatever to eat but sugar. Love, love . . . the very word made her want to slap somebody. “Why should I love you? Why should I?” she would ask amazed sometimes when somebody was trying—somebody was always trying—to propose to her. But she never got a real answer, only further incoherence.

The war finished Scrap. It killed the one man she felt safe with, whom she would have married, and it finally turned her off love. Since then, she had been bitter. She was struggling as angrily in the sweet stuff of life as a wasp caught in honey. Just as desperately, she tried to unstick her wings. It gave her no pleasure to outdo other women; she didn’t want their annoying men. What could one do with men once you had them? None of them would talk to her about anything but love, and that became so foolish and tiring after a while. It was like a healthy person with a normal appetite being given nothing but sugar to eat. Love, love... just the word made her want to slap someone. “Why should I love you? Why should I?” she would sometimes ask in disbelief when someone was trying—someone was always trying—to propose to her. But she never got a real answer, only more confusion.

A deep cynicism took hold of the unhappy Scrap. Her inside grew hoary with disillusionment, while her gracious and charming outside continued to make the world more beautiful. What had the future in it for her? She would not be able, after such a preparation, to take hold of it. She was fit for nothing; she had wasted all this time being beautiful. Presently she wouldn’t be beautiful, and what then? Scrap didn’t know what then, it appalled her to wonder even. Tired as she was of being conspicuous she was at least used to that, she had never known anything else; and to become inconspicuous, to fade, to grow shabby and dim, would probably be most painful. And once she began, what years and years of it there would be! Imagine, thought Scrap, having most of one’s life at the wrong end. Imagine being old for two or three times as long as being young. Stupid, stupid. Everything was stupid. There wasn’t a thing she wanted to do. There were thousands of things she didn’t want to do. Avoidance, silence, invisibility, if possible unconsciousness—these negations were all she asked for at the moment; and here, even here, she was not allowed a minute’s peace, and this absurd woman must come pretending, merely because she wanted to exercise power and make her go to bed and make her—hideous—drink castor oil, that she thought she was ill.

A deep cynicism settled in the unhappy Scrap. Inside, she felt gray with disappointment, while her lovely and charming exterior continued to make the world a prettier place. What did the future hold for her? After all this, she wouldn’t be able to grasp it. She felt useless; she had spent so much time being beautiful. Soon she wouldn’t be beautiful anymore, and then what? Scrap had no idea what would come next, and the thought terrified her. Tired of standing out, she at least felt accustomed to it; she had never known anything different. The idea of becoming unnoticed, fading away, growing shabby and dull seemed really painful. And once she started, there would be years and years of it! Just imagine, Scrap thought, spending most of her life at the wrong end. Imagine being old for two or three times as long as being young. Stupid, stupid. Everything was stupid. There wasn’t a single thing she wanted to do. There were thousands of things she didn’t want to do. Avoidance, silence, invisibility, even unconsciousness—these were all she asked for at the moment; and here, even here, she couldn’t get a moment’s peace, and this ridiculous woman had to come pretending that just because she wanted to exert control, she could make her go to bed and force her—ugh—to drink castor oil, convinced that she was unwell.

“I’m sure,” said Mrs. Fisher, who felt the cold of the stone beginning to come through and knew she could not sit much longer, “you’ll do what is reasonable. Your mother would wish—have you a mother?”

“I’m sure,” said Mrs. Fisher, feeling the cold stone starting to seep through and knowing she couldn’t sit much longer, “you’ll do what’s reasonable. Your mom would want—do you have a mom?”

A faint wonder came into Scrap’s eyes. Have you a mother? If ever anybody had a mother it was Scrap. It had not occurred to her that there could be people who had never heard of her mother. She was one of the major marchionesses—there being, as no one knew better than Scrap, marchionesses and marchionesses—and had held high positions at Court. Her father, too, in his day had been most prominent. His day was a little over, poor dear, because in the war he had made some important mistakes, and besides he was now grown old; still, there he was, an excessively well-known person. How restful, how extraordinarily restful to have found some one who had never heard of any of her lot, or at least had not yet connected her with them.

A hint of curiosity sparkled in Scrap’s eyes. Do you have a mother? If anyone had a mother, it was Scrap. She had never considered that there could be people who didn’t know about her mother. She was one of the major marchionesses—there were, as Scrap knew better than anyone, different kinds of marchionesses—and she had held prestigious roles at Court. Her father had also been quite prominent in his time. His time was a bit over now, poor guy, because during the war he had made some significant mistakes, and on top of that, he was getting old; still, he was very well-known. How comforting, how incredibly comforting it was to have found someone who had no idea about her family, or at least hadn’t yet connected her to them.

She began to like Mrs. Fisher. Perhaps the originals didn’t know anything about her either. When she first wrote to them and signed her name, that great name of Dester which twisted in and out of English history like a bloody thread, for its bearers constantly killed, she had taken it for granted that they would know who she was; and at the interview in Shaftesbury Avenue she was sure they did know, because they hadn’t asked, as they otherwise would have, for references.

She started to like Mrs. Fisher. Maybe the originals didn’t know anything about her either. When she first wrote to them and signed her name, that famous name of Dester which wove in and out of English history like a bloody thread, since its bearers were always killing, she had assumed they would know who she was; and during the meeting on Shaftesbury Avenue, she was sure they did know, because they didn’t ask, like they normally would, for references.

Scrap began to cheer up. If nobody at San Salvatore had ever heard of her, if for a whole month she could shed herself, get right away from everything connected with herself, be allowed really to forget the clinging and the clogging and all the noise, why, perhaps she might make something of herself after all. She might really think; really clear up her mind; really come to some conclusion.

Scrap started to feel better. If no one at San Salvatore knew who she was, if she could completely escape from everything tied to her for a whole month, and truly forget about the weight and the chaos surrounding her, then maybe she could actually find a way to be someone after all. She could really think, truly clear her mind, and finally come to some conclusions.

“What I want to do here,” she said, leaning forward in her chair and clasping her hands round her knees and looking up at Mrs. Fisher, whose seat was higher than hers, almost with animation, so much pleased was she that Mrs. Fisher knew nothing about her, “is to come to a conclusion. That’s all. It isn’t much to want, is it? Just that.”

“What I want to do here,” she said, leaning forward in her chair, wrapping her hands around her knees, and looking up at Mrs. Fisher, whose seat was higher than hers, almost excitedly, so pleased was she that Mrs. Fisher knew nothing about her, “is to come to a conclusion. That’s all. It isn’t much to want, right? Just that.”

She gazed at Mrs. Fisher, and thought that almost any conclusion would do; the great thing was to get hold of something, catch something tight, cease to drift.

She looked at Mrs. Fisher and thought that nearly any conclusion would be fine; the important thing was to grab onto something, hold on tight, and stop drifting.

Mrs. Fisher’s little eyes surveyed her. “I should say,” she said, “that what a young woman like you wants is a husband and children.”

Mrs. Fisher’s small eyes looked her over. “I would say,” she said, “that what a young woman like you needs is a husband and kids.”

“Well, that’s one of the things I’m going to consider,” said Scrap amiably. “But I don’t think it would be a conclusion.”

“Well, that’s one of the things I’m going to think about,” Scrap said kindly. “But I don’t think it would be a decision.”

“And meanwhile,” said Mrs. Fisher, getting up, for the cold of the stone was now through, “I shouldn’t trouble my head if I were you with considerings and conclusions. Women’s heads weren’t made for thinking, I assure you. I should go to bed and get well.”

"And in the meantime," Mrs. Fisher said, standing up because the cold from the stone was now getting to her, "I wouldn't worry so much about thoughts and conclusions if I were you. Women aren't really meant for thinking, trust me. You should just go to bed and rest up."

“I am well,” said Scrap.

"I'm good," said Scrap.

“Then why did you send a message that you were ill?”

“Then why did you message that you were sick?”

“I didn’t.”

"I didn't."

“Then I’ve had all the trouble of coming out here for nothing.”

“Then I’ve gone through all this trouble to come out here for no reason.”

“But wouldn’t you prefer coming out and finding me well than coming out and finding me ill?” asked Scrap, smiling.

“But wouldn’t you rather come out and find me in good health than come out and find me unwell?” asked Scrap, smiling.

Even Mrs. Fisher was caught by the smile.

Even Mrs. Fisher couldn't resist the smile.

“Well, you’re a pretty creature,” she said forgivingly. “It’s a pity you weren’t born fifty years ago. My friends would have liked looking at you.”

“Well, you’re a pretty thing,” she said kindly. “It’s a shame you weren’t born fifty years ago. My friends would have enjoyed looking at you.”

“I’m very glad I wasn’t,” said Scrap. “I dislike being looked at.”

“I’m really glad I wasn’t,” said Scrap. “I hate being stared at.”

“Absurd,” said Mrs. Fisher, growing stern again. “That’s what you are made for, young women like you. For what else, pray? And I assure you that if my friends had looked at you, you would have been looked at by some very great people.”

“Absurd,” said Mrs. Fisher, becoming serious again. “That’s what you're meant for, young women like you. What else could it be, really? And I assure you that if my friends had seen you, you would have been noticed by some really important people.”

“I dislike very great people,” said Scrap, frowning. There had been an incident quite recently—really potentates. . .

“I dislike really important people,” said Scrap, frowning. There had been an incident quite recently—really powerful people. . .

“What I dislike,” said Mrs. Fisher, now as cold as the stone she had got up from, “is the pose of the modern young woman. It seems to me pitiful, positively pitiful, in its silliness.”

“What I dislike,” said Mrs. Fisher, now as cold as the stone she had gotten up from, “is the attitude of the modern young woman. It seems to me pathetic, really pathetic, in its foolishness.”

And, her stick crunching the pebbles, she walked away.

And, with her stick crunching the pebbles, she walked away.

“That’s all right,” Scrap said to herself, dropping back into her comfortable position with her head in the cushion and her feet on the parapet; if only people would go away she didn’t in the least mind why they went.

“That’s fine,” Scrap said to herself, settling back into her cozy position with her head on the cushion and her feet on the parapet; she really didn't care why people left, just as long as they did.

“Don’t you think darling Scrap is growing a little, just a little, peculiar?” her mother had asked her father a short time before that latest peculiarity of the flight to San Salvatore, uncomfortably struck by the very odd things Scrap said and the way she had taken to slinking out of reach whenever she could and avoiding everybody except—such a sign of age—quite young men, almost boys.

“Don’t you think darling Scrap is acting a bit strange, just a bit?” her mother had asked her father shortly before that latest odd moment during the flight to San Salvatore, feeling uneasy about the strange things Scrap was saying and how she had started to sneak away whenever she could, avoiding everyone except—such a sign of growing up—quite young men, almost boys.

“Eh? What? Peculiar? Well, let her be peculiar if she likes. A woman with her looks can be any damned thing she pleases,” was the infatuated answer.

“Eh? What? Strange? Well, let her be strange if she wants. A woman with her looks can be whatever the hell she pleases,” was the smitten response.

“I do let her,” said her mother meekly; and indeed if she did not, what difference would it make?

“I let her,” her mom said softly; and honestly, if she didn’t, what difference would it really make?

Mrs. Fisher was sorry she had bothered about Lady Caroline. She went along the hall towards her private sitting-room, and her stick as she went struck the stone floor with a vigour in harmony with her feelings. Sheer silliness, these poses. She had no patience with them. Unable to be or do anything of themselves, the young of the present generation tried to achieve a reputation for cleverness by decrying all that was obviously great and obviously good and by praising everything, however obviously bad, that was different. Apes, thought Mrs. Fisher, roused. Apes. Apes. And in her sitting-room she found more apes, or what seemed to her in her present mood more, for there was Mrs. Arbuthnot placidly drinking coffee, while at the writing-table, the writing-table she already looked upon as sacred, using her pen, her own pen brought for her hand alone from Prince of Wales Terrace, sat Mrs. Wilkins writing; at the table; in her room; with her pen.

Mrs. Fisher regretted having worried about Lady Caroline. She walked down the hall toward her private sitting room, and her cane struck the stone floor with a force that matched her feelings. Such nonsense, these attitudes. She had no patience for them. Unable to be or do anything on their own, the youth of today tried to gain a reputation for intelligence by criticizing everything that was obviously great and good, while praising anything, no matter how terrible, just because it was different. Monkeys, thought Mrs. Fisher, annoyed. Monkeys. Monkeys. And in her sitting room, she found even more monkeys, or at least that’s how it felt to her in her current mood, because there was Mrs. Arbuthnot calmly drinking coffee, while at the writing table—the very writing table she considered sacred—sat Mrs. Wilkins, using her pen, her own pen that she had brought just for her use from Prince of Wales Terrace, and writing; at the table; in her room; with her pen.

“Isn’t this a delightful place?” said Mrs. Arbuthnot cordially. “We have just discovered it.”

“Isn’t this a lovely place?” Mrs. Arbuthnot said warmly. “We just found it.”

“I’m writing to Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins, turning her head and also cordially—as though, Mrs. Fisher thought, she cared a straw who she was writing to and anyhow knew who the person she called Mellersh was. “He’ll want to know,” said Mrs. Wilkins, optimism induced by her surroundings, “that I’ve got here safely.”

“I’m writing to Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins, turning her head and also smiling warmly—as if, Mrs. Fisher thought, she actually cared a bit about who she was writing to and definitely knew who this Mellersh was. “He’ll want to know,” said Mrs. Wilkins, her optimism boosted by her surroundings, “that I’ve arrived safely.”

Chapter 11

The sweet smells that were everywhere in San Salvatore were alone enough to produce concord. They came into the sitting-room from the flowers on the battlements, and met the ones from the flowers inside the room, and almost, thought Mrs. Wilkins, could be seen greeting each other with a holy kiss. Who could be angry in the middle of such gentlenesses? Who could be acquisitive, selfish, in the old rasped London way, in the presence of this bounteous beauty?

The sweet smells that filled San Salvatore were enough to create harmony. They drifted into the living room from the flowers on the battlements and mingled with the ones inside, and Mrs. Wilkins almost imagined they were greeting each other with a holy kiss. Who could feel angry surrounded by such gentleness? Who could be greedy or selfish, like in old, grating London, in the face of this abundant beauty?

Yet Mrs. Fisher seemed to be all three of these things.

Yet Mrs. Fisher appeared to be all three of these things.

There was so much beauty, so much more than enough for every one, that it did appear to be a vain activity to try and make a corner in it.

There was so much beauty, so much more than enough for everyone, that it seemed pointless to try to claim a piece of it.

Yet Mrs. Fisher was trying to make a corner in it, and had railed off a portion for her exclusive use.

Yet Mrs. Fisher was trying to corner the market on it and had set aside a section for her exclusive use.

Well, she would get over that presently; she would get over it inevitably, Mrs. Wilkins was sure, after a day or two in the extraordinary atmosphere of peace in that place.

Well, she would get over that soon; she would definitely get over it, Mrs. Wilkins was sure, after a day or two in the incredible peaceful vibe of that place.

Meanwhile she obviously hadn’t even begun to get over it. She stood looking at her and Rose with an expression that appeared to be one of anger. Anger. Fancy. Silly old nerve-racked London feelings, thought Mrs. Wilkins, whose eyes saw the room full of kisses, and everybody in it being kissed, Mrs. Fisher as copiously as she herself and Rose.

Meanwhile, it was clear she hadn't even started to move on. She was staring at her and Rose with an expression that seemed to be anger. Anger. How ridiculous. Those silly, tense London feelings, thought Mrs. Wilkins, whose eyes saw the room filled with kisses, and everyone in it being kissed, Mrs. Fisher included, just as much as she and Rose.

“You don’t like us being in here,” said Mrs. Wilkins, getting up and at once, after her manner, fixing on the truth. “Why?”

"You don't want us here," said Mrs. Wilkins, standing up and immediately, as was her style, aiming for the truth. "Why?"

“I should have thought,” said Mrs. Fisher leaning on her stick, “you could have seen that it is my room.”

“I should have figured,” said Mrs. Fisher, leaning on her cane, “that you would have noticed it’s my room.”

“You mean because of the photographs,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“You mean because of the pictures,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was a little red and surprised, got up too.

Mrs. Arbuthnot, looking a bit flushed and surprised, stood up as well.

“And the notepaper,” said Mrs. Fisher. “Notepaper with my London address on it. That pen—”

“And the notepaper,” said Mrs. Fisher. “Notepaper with my London address on it. That pen—”

She pointed. It was still in Mrs. Wilkins’s hand.

She pointed. It was still in Mrs. Wilkins's hand.

“Is yours. I’m very sorry,” said Mrs. Wilkins, laying it on the table. And she added smiling, that it had just been writing some very amiable things.

“Is yours. I’m really sorry,” said Mrs. Wilkins, placing it on the table. And she added with a smile that it had just been writing some very nice things.

“But why,” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, who found herself unable to acquiesce in Mrs. Fisher’s arrangements without at least a gentle struggle, “ought we not to be here? It’s a sitting-room.”

“But why,” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, who couldn’t accept Mrs. Fisher’s plans without at least a little resistance, “shouldn’t we be here? It’s a living room.”

“There is another one,” said Mrs. Fisher. “You and your friend cannot sit in two rooms at once, and if I have no wish to disturb you in yours I am unable to see why you should wish to disturb me in mine.”

“There’s another thing,” said Mrs. Fisher. “You and your friend can’t occupy two rooms at the same time, and since I don’t want to interrupt you in yours, I don’t see why you should want to interrupt me in mine.”

“But why—” began Mrs. Arbuthnot again.

“But why—” started Mrs. Arbuthnot again.

“It’s quite natural,” Mrs. Wilkins interrupted, for Rose was looking stubborn; and turning to Mrs. Fisher she said that although sharing things with friends was pleasant she could understand that Mrs. Fisher, still steeped in the Prince of Wales Terrace attitude to life, did not yet want to, but that she would get rid of that after a bit and feel quite different. “Soon you’ll want us to share,” said Mrs. Wilkins reassuringly. “Why, you may even get so far as asking me to use your pen if you knew I hadn’t got one.”

“It’s totally normal,” Mrs. Wilkins interrupted, as Rose was looking stubborn. Turning to Mrs. Fisher, she said that while sharing things with friends was enjoyable, she understood that Mrs. Fisher, still caught up in the Prince of Wales Terrace mindset, wasn't ready to share yet. But she would get over that eventually and feel completely different. “Soon, you’ll want us to share,” Mrs. Wilkins said encouragingly. “In fact, you might even end up asking me to use your pen if you knew I didn’t have one.”

Mrs. Fisher was moved almost beyond control by this speech. To have a ramshackle young woman from Hampstead patting her on the back as it were, in breezy certitude that quite soon she would improve, stirred her more deeply than anything had stirred her since her first discovery that Mr. Fisher was not what he seemed. Mrs. Wilkins must certainly be curbed. But how? There was a curious imperviousness about her. At that moment, for instance, she was smiling as pleasantly and with as unclouded a face as if she were saying nothing in the least impertinent. Would she know she was being curbed? If she didn’t know, if she were too tough to feel it, then what? Nothing, except avoidance; except, precisely, one’s own private sitting-room.

Mrs. Fisher was nearly beside herself with emotion after this speech. Having a disheveled young woman from Hampstead confidently patting her on the back, believing that she would soon improve, affected her more deeply than anything had since she first realized that Mr. Fisher wasn’t what he appeared to be. Mrs. Wilkins definitely needed to be controlled. But how? There was something oddly unyielding about her. At that moment, for instance, she was smiling so pleasantly and with such an open expression as if she were saying nothing at all inappropriate. Would she even notice she was being restrained? If she didn’t notice, if she was too resilient to feel it, then what? Nothing, apart from avoidance; nothing but one’s own private sitting room.

“I’m an old woman,” said Mrs. Fisher, “and I need a room to myself. I cannot get about, because of my stick. As I cannot get about I have to sit. Why should I not sit quietly and undisturbed, as I told you in London I intended to? If people are to come in and out all day long, chattering and leaving doors open, you will have broken the agreement, which was that I was to be quiet.”

“I’m an old woman,” said Mrs. Fisher, “and I need a room to myself. I can’t move around because of my cane. Since I can’t move around, I have to sit. Why shouldn’t I sit quietly and undisturbed, as I mentioned to you in London? If people are coming in and out all day, chatting and leaving doors open, you will have violated our agreement, which was that I was to have peace and quiet.”

“But we haven’t the least wish—” began Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was again cut short by Mrs. Wilkins.

“But we don’t have the slightest desire—” started Mrs. Arbuthnot, who was once again interrupted by Mrs. Wilkins.

“We’re only too glad,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “for you to have this room if it makes you happy. We didn’t know about it, that’s all. We wouldn’t have come in if we had—not till you invited us, anyhow. I expect,” she finished looking down cheerfully at Mrs. Fisher, “you soon will.” And picking up her letter she took Mrs. Arbuthnot’s hand and drew her towards the door.

“We’re really happy,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “for you to have this room if it makes you happy. We just didn’t know about it, that’s all. We wouldn’t have come in if we had known—not until you invited us, anyway. I expect,” she added, looking down cheerfully at Mrs. Fisher, “you will soon.” Then, picking up her letter, she took Mrs. Arbuthnot’s hand and pulled her towards the door.

Mrs. Arbuthnot did not want to go. She, the mildest of women, was filled with a curious and surely unchristian desire to stay and fight. Not, of course, really, nor even with any definitely aggressive words. No; she only wanted to reason with Mrs. Fisher, and to reason patiently. But she did feel that something ought to be said, and that she ought not to allow herself to be rated and turned out as if she were a schoolgirl caught in ill behaviour by Authority.

Mrs. Arbuthnot didn’t want to leave. She, the gentlest of women, was filled with a strange, definitely unchristian urge to stay and stand her ground. Not in a literal way, and not even with any overtly aggressive words. No; she just wanted to talk things over with Mrs. Fisher, and to do so calmly. But she felt that something needed to be said, and that she shouldn’t let herself be judged and kicked out as if she were a schoolgirl caught misbehaving by someone in charge.

Mrs. Wilkins, however, drew her firmly to and through the door, and once again Rose wondered at Lotty, at her balance, her sweet and equable temper—she who in England had been such a thing of gusts. From the moment they got into Italy it was Lotty who seemed the elder. She certainly was very happy; blissful, in fact. Did happiness so completely protect one? Did it make one so untouchable, so wise? Rose was happy herself, but not anything like so happy. Evidently not, for not only did she want to fight Mrs. Fisher but she wanted something else, something more than this lovely place, something to complete it; she wanted Frederick. For the first time in her life she was surrounded by perfect beauty, and her one thought was to show it to him, to share it with him. She wanted Frederick. She yearned for Frederick. Ah, if only, only Frederick . . .

Mrs. Wilkins, however, pulled her firmly through the door, and once again Rose admired Lotty, her poise, her sweet and balanced temperament—she who had been such a whirlwind back in England. From the moment they arrived in Italy, Lotty seemed older. She was definitely very happy; in fact, she was blissful. Did happiness really protect someone so completely? Did it make a person untouchable, so wise? Rose was happy too, but not anything like that happy. Clearly not, because not only did she want to confront Mrs. Fisher, but she also wanted something else, something beyond this beautiful place, something to complete it; she wanted Frederick. For the first time in her life, she was surrounded by perfect beauty, and her only thought was to show it to him, to share it with him. She wanted Frederick. She longed for Frederick. Ah, if only, just Frederick...

“Poor old thing,” said Mrs. Wilkins, shutting the door gently on Mrs. Fisher and her triumph. “Fancy on a day like this.”

“Poor thing,” Mrs. Wilkins said, gently closing the door on Mrs. Fisher and her victory. “Can you believe it on a day like this?”

“She’s a very rude old thing,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

"She's really a very rude old lady," said Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“She’ll get over that. I’m sorry we chose just her room to go and sit in.”

“She'll get over it. I'm sorry we picked just her room to hang out in.”

“It’s much the nicest,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “And it isn’t hers.”

“It’s the nicest one,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot. “And it doesn’t belong to her.”

“Oh but there are lots of other places, and she’s such a poor old thing. Let her have the room. Whatever does it matter?”

“Oh, but there are so many other places, and she’s such a poor thing. Let her have the room. What does it really matter?”

And Mrs. Wilkins said she was going down to the village to find out where the post-office was and post her letter to Mellersh, and would Rose go too.

And Mrs. Wilkins said she was going down to the village to find out where the post office was and to mail her letter to Mellersh, and asked if Rose would come along.

“I’ve been thinking about Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins as they walked, one behind the other, down the narrow zigzag path up which they had climbed in the rain the night before.

“I’ve been thinking about Mellersh,” Mrs. Wilkins said as they walked, one behind the other, down the narrow zigzag path they had climbed in the rain the night before.

She went first. Mrs. Arbuthnot, quite naturally now, followed. In England it had been the other way about—Lotty, timid, hesitating, except when she burst out so awkwardly, getting behind the calm and reasonable Rose whenever she could.

She went first. Mrs. Arbuthnot, quite naturally now, followed. In England, it had been the opposite—Lotty, shy and hesitant, except when she awkwardly spoke up, always getting behind the calm and reasonable Rose whenever she could.

“I’ve been thinking about Mellersh,” repeated Mrs. Wilkins over her shoulder, as Rose seemed not to have heard.

“I’ve been thinking about Mellersh,” Mrs. Wilkins said again, looking back, since it seemed Rose hadn’t heard her.

“Have you?” said Rose, a faint distaste in her voice, for her experiences with Mellersh had not been of a kind to make her enjoy remembering him. She had deceived Mellersh; therefore she didn’t like him. She was unconscious that this was the reason of her dislike, and thought it was that there didn’t seem to be much, if any, of the grace of God about him. And yet how wrong to feel that, she rebuked herself, and how presumptuous. No doubt Lotty’s husband was far, far nearer to God than she herself was ever likely to be. Still, she didn’t like him.

“Have you?” Rose asked, a hint of distaste in her voice, as her experiences with Mellersh hadn’t been pleasant. She had tricked Mellersh; that’s why she didn’t like him. She didn’t realize that this was the reason for her dislike, instead believing it was because he lacked any of the grace of God. Yet, she scolded herself for feeling that way and for being so presumptuous. No doubt Lotty’s husband was much closer to God than she could ever hope to be. Still, she just didn’t like him.

“I’ve been a mean dog,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“I’ve been a nasty dog,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

“A what?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, incredulous of her hearing.

“A what?” asked Mrs. Arbuthnot, unable to believe what she was hearing.

“All this coming away and leaving him in that dreary place while I rollick in heaven. He had planned to take me to Italy for Easter himself. Did I tell you?”

“All this leaving him in that gloomy place while I have fun in heaven. He was going to take me to Italy for Easter himself. Did I mention that?”

“No,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot; and indeed she had discouraged talk about husbands. Whenever Lotty had begun to blurt out things she had swiftly changed the conversation. One husband led to another, in conversation as well as in life, she felt, and she could not, she would not, talk of Frederick. Beyond the bare fact that he was there, he had not been mentioned. Mellersh had had to be mentioned, because of his obstructiveness, but she had carefully kept him from overflowing outside the limits of necessity.

“No,” Mrs. Arbuthnot said; and in fact, she had steered clear of discussions about husbands. Whenever Lotty started to spill her thoughts, she quickly changed the subject. One husband led to another, both in conversation and in life, she felt, and she couldn’t, she wouldn’t, talk about Frederick. Apart from the simple fact that he was present, he hadn’t been brought up. Mellersh had to be mentioned due to his interference, but she had carefully limited any talk about him to what was absolutely necessary.

“Well, he did,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “He had never done such a thing in his life before, and I was horrified. Fancy—just as I had planned to come to it myself.”

“Well, he did,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “He had never done anything like that in his life before, and I was shocked. Can you believe it—just as I was planning to do it myself?”

She paused on the path and looked up at Rose.

She stopped on the path and looked up at Rose.

“Yes,” said Rose, trying to think of something else to talk about.

“Yes,” said Rose, trying to come up with another topic to discuss.

“Now you see why I say I’ve been a mean dog. He had planned a holiday in Italy with me, and I had planned a holiday in Italy leaving him at home. I think,” she went on, her eyes fixed on Rose’s face, “Mellersh has every reason to be both angry and hurt.”

“Now you see why I say I’ve been a terrible person. He had planned a vacation in Italy with me, and I had planned a trip to Italy leaving him at home. I think,” she continued, her eyes locked on Rose’s face, “Mellersh has every right to be both angry and hurt.”

Mrs. Arbuthnot was astonished. The extraordinary quickness with which, hour by hour, under her very eyes, Lotty became more selfless, disconcerted her. She was turning into something surprisingly like a saint. Here she was now being affectionate about Mellersh—Mellersh, who only that morning, while they hung their feet into the sea, had seemed a mere iridescence, Lotty had told her, a thing of gauze. That was only that morning; and by the time they had had lunch Lotty had developed so far as to have got him solid enough again to write to, and to write to at length. And now, a few minutes later, she was announcing that he had every reason to be angry with her and hurt, and that she herself had been—the language was unusual, but it did express real penitence—a mean dog.

Mrs. Arbuthnot was shocked. The unbelievable speed at which, hour by hour, right before her eyes, Lotty became more selfless confused her. She was transforming into something surprisingly close to a saint. Here she was now being affectionate about Mellersh—Mellersh, who just that morning, while they dangled their feet in the sea, had seemed like nothing more than a fleeting shimmer, Lotty had said, something thin and delicate. That was just this morning; and by the time they had lunch, Lotty had progressed so much that he seemed solid enough to write to, and to write to at length. And now, just a few minutes later, she was declaring that he had every reason to be angry with her and hurt, and that she herself had been—the words were unusual, but they did convey real remorse—a mean dog.

Rose stared at her astonished. If she went on like this, soon a nimbus might be expected round her head, was there already, if one didn’t know it was the sun through the tree-trunks catching her sandy hair.

Rose stared at her, amazed. If she kept this up, a halo might soon be expected around her head. There might already be one, if you didn’t know it was just the sun shining through the tree trunks catching her sandy hair.

A great desire to love and be friends, to love everybody, to be friends with everybody, seemed to be invading Lotty—a desire for sheer goodness. Rose’s own experience was that goodness, the state of being good, was only reached with difficulty and pain. It took a long time to get to it; in fact one never did get to it, or, if for a flashing instant one did, it was only for a flashing instant. Desperate perseverance was needed to struggle along its path, and all the way was dotted with doubts. Lotty simply flew along. She had certainly, thought Rose, not got rid of her impetuousness. It had merely taken another direction. She was now impetuously becoming a saint. Could one really attain goodness so violently? Wouldn’t there be an equally violent reaction?

A strong desire to love and be friends with everyone was taking over Lotty—a desire for pure goodness. Rose’s experience was that being good was hard to achieve and often came with difficulty and pain. It took a long time to get there; in fact, you never really got there, or if you did for a brief moment, it was just that—a brief moment. It required relentless effort to keep moving along that path, and it was full of doubts. Lotty, on the other hand, was soaring. Rose thought that Lotty hadn't lost her impulsiveness; it had just changed direction. She was now impulsively trying to become a saint. Was it really possible to achieve goodness so fervently? Wouldn't there be an equally intense backlash?

“I shouldn’t,” said Rose with caution, looking down into Lotty’s bright eyes—the path was steep, so that Lotty was well below her—“I shouldn’t be sure of that too quickly.”

“I shouldn’t,” said Rose cautiously, looking down into Lotty’s bright eyes—the path was steep, so Lotty was well below her—“I shouldn’t jump to conclusions too quickly.”

“But I am sure of it, and I’ve written and told him so.”

“But I'm sure of it, and I've written and told him that.”

Rose stared. “Why, but only this morning—” she began.

Rose stared. “Wait, just this morning—” she started.

“It’s all in this,” interrupted Lotty, tapping the envelope and looking pleased.

“It’s all in this,” interrupted Lotty, tapping the envelope and looking satisfied.

“What—everything?”

"What—everything?"

“You mean about the advertisement and my savings being spent? Oh no—not yet. But I’ll tell him all that when he comes.”

“You're talking about the ad and how I've used my savings? Oh no—not yet. But I’ll explain everything to him when he arrives.”

“When he comes?” repeated Rose.

"When is he coming?" repeated Rose.

“I’ve invited him to come and stay with us.”

“I’ve invited him to come and stay with us.”

Rose could only go on staring.

Rose could only keep looking.

“It’s the least I could do. Besides—look at this.” Lotty waved her hand. “Disgusting not to share it. I was a mean dog to go off and leave him, but no dog I’ve ever heard of was ever as mean as I’d be if I didn’t try and persuade Mellersh to come out and enjoy this too. It’s barest decency that he should have some of the fun out of my nest-egg. After all, he has housed me and fed me for years. One shouldn’t be churlish.”

“It’s the least I could do. Plus—check this out.” Lotty waved her hand. “It would be selfish not to share it. I was kind of a jerk to just leave him, but no one I know is as much of a jerk as I’d be if I didn’t at least try to convince Mellersh to come out and enjoy this too. It’s only fair that he gets to have some fun from my little stash. After all, he’s been giving me a place to stay and meals for years. You shouldn’t be stingy.”

“But—do you think he’ll come?”

“But—do you think he will come?”

“Oh, I hope so,” said Lotty with the utmost earnestness; and added, “Poor lamb.”

“Oh, I hope so,” Lotty said earnestly, and added, “Poor thing.”

At that Rose felt she would like to sit down. Mellersh a poor lamb? That same Mellersh who a few hours before was mere shimmer? There was a seat at the bend of the path, and Rose went to it and sat down. She wished to get her breath, gain time. If she had time she might perhaps be able to catch up the leaping Lotty, and perhaps be able to stop her before she committed herself to what she probably presently would be sorry for. Mellersh at San Salvatore? Mellersh, from whom Lotty had taken such pains so recently to escape?

At that moment, Rose felt like she needed to sit down. Mellersh, a poor guy? That same Mellersh who only a few hours ago was just a blur? There was a bench at the curve of the path, and Rose went over to it and sat down. She wanted to catch her breath and buy some time. If she had some time, she might be able to catch up with the energetic Lotty and maybe stop her before she got herself into something she would likely regret. Mellersh at San Salvatore? Mellersh, whom Lotty had recently gone to such lengths to avoid?

“I see him here,” said Lotty, as if in answer to her thoughts.

“I see him here,” said Lotty, as if responding to her thoughts.

Rose looked at her with real concern: for every time Lotty said in that convinced voice, “I see,” what she saw came true. Then it was to be supposed that Mr. Wilkins too would presently come true.

Rose looked at her with genuine concern: every time Lotty said in that convinced tone, “I see,” whatever she saw ended up happening. So it was expected that Mr. Wilkins would soon become a reality too.

“I wish,” said Rose anxiously, “I understood you.”

“I wish,” Rose said nervously, “that I understood you.”

“Don’t try,” said Lotty, smiling.

“Don’t try,” Lotty said, smiling.

“But I must, because I love you.”

“But I have to, because I love you.”

“Dear Rose,” said Lotty, swiftly bending down and kissing her.

“Dear Rose,” Lotty said, quickly bending down and giving her a kiss.

“You’re so quick,” said Rose. “I can’t follow your developments. I can’t keep touch. It was what happened with Freder—”

“You're so fast,” said Rose. “I can’t keep up with what you're doing. I can’t stay connected. It was just like what happened with Freder—”

She broke off and looked frightened.

She stopped abruptly and looked scared.

“The whole idea of our coming here,” she went on again, as Lotty didn’t seem to have noticed, “was to get away, wasn’t it? Well, we’ve got away. And now, after only a single day of it, you want to write to the very people—”

“The whole idea of us being here,” she continued, since Lotty didn’t seem to notice, “was to get away, right? Well, we’ve gotten away. And now, after just one day of it, you want to write to the very people—”

She stopped.

She halted.

“The very people we were getting away from,” finished Lotty. “It’s quite true. It seems idiotically illogical. But I’m so happy, I’m so well, I feel so fearfully wholesome. This place—why, it makes me feel flooded with love.”

“The very people we were escaping from,” Lotty concluded. “It’s completely true. It seems ridiculously illogical. But I’m so happy, I feel so good, I feel so incredibly wholesome. This place—wow, it makes me feel flooded with love.”

And she stared down at Rose in a kind of radiant surprise.

And she looked down at Rose in a sort of glowing surprise.

Rose was silent a moment. Then she said, “And do you think it will have the same effect on Mr. Wilkins?”

Rose was quiet for a moment. Then she said, “Do you think it will have the same effect on Mr. Wilkins?”

Lotty laughed. “I don’t know,” she said. “But even if it doesn’t, there’s enough love about to flood fifty Mr. Wilkinses, as you call him. The great thing is to have lots of love about. I don’t see,” she went on, “at least I don’t see here, though I did at home, that it matters who loves as long as somebody does. I was a stingy beast at home, and used to measure and count. I had a queer obsession about justice. As though justice mattered. As though justice can really be distinguished from vengeance. It’s only love that’s any good. At home I wouldn’t love Mellersh unless he loved me back, exactly as much, absolute fairness. Did you ever. And as he didn’t, neither did I, and the aridity of that house! The aridity . . .”

Lotty laughed. “I don’t know,” she said. “But even if it doesn’t work out, there’s enough love around to overwhelm fifty Mr. Wilkinses, as you call him. The important thing is to have plenty of love around. I don’t see,” she continued, “at least not here, though I did at home, that it matters who loves as long as someone does. I was really stingy at home and used to measure and count everything. I had a weird fixation on justice. As if justice actually mattered. As if justice can truly be separated from vengeance. It’s only love that’s worth anything. At home, I wouldn’t love Mellersh unless he loved me back just as much, complete fairness. Can you believe that? And since he didn’t, neither did I, and the aridity of that house! The aridity . . .”

Rose said nothing. She was bewildered by Lotty. One odd effect of San Salvatore on her rapidly developing friend was her sudden free use of robust words. She had not used them in Hampstead. Beast and dog were more robust than Hampstead cared about. In words, too, Lotty had come unchained.

Rose said nothing. She was confused by Lotty. One strange effect of San Salvatore on her quickly changing friend was her sudden, frequent use of strong language. She hadn’t used those words back in Hampstead. “Beast” and “dog” were much too strong for Hampstead’s tastes. In terms of language, Lotty had become uninhibited.

But how she wished, oh how Rose wished, that she too could write to her husband and say “Come.” The Wilkins ménage, however pompous Mellersh might be, and he had seemed to Rose pompous, was on a healthier, more natural footing than hers. Lotty could write to Mellersh and would get an answer. She couldn’t write to Frederick, for only too well did she know he wouldn’t answer. At least, he might answer—a hurried scribble, showing how much bored he was at doing it, with perfunctory thanks for her letter. But that would be worse than no answer at all; for his handwriting, her name on an envelope addressed by him, stabbed her heart. Too acutely did it bring back the letters of their beginnings together, the letters from him so desolate with separation, so aching with love and longing. To see apparently one of these very same letters arrive, and open it and find:

But how she wished, oh how Rose wished, that she could also write to her husband and say “Come.” The Wilkins household, no matter how pompous Mellersh might be—he did seem pompous to Rose—had a healthier, more natural relationship than hers. Lotty could write to Mellersh and would get a response. She couldn’t write to Frederick because she knew he wouldn’t reply. At best, he might send a rushed note, showing how bored he was to write it, with a half-hearted thanks for her letter. But that would be worse than no reply at all; because his handwriting, her name on an envelope addressed by him, pierced her heart. It reminded her too vividly of the letters from their early days together, letters from him that were filled with the loneliness of separation, overflowing with love and longing. To see what looked like one of those letters arrive, open it, and find:

Dear Rose—Thanks for letter. Glad you’re having a good time. Don’t hurry back. Say if you want any money. Everything going splendidly here.—        Yours,
Frederick.

Dear Rose—Thanks for your letter. I'm glad you're having a good time. Don’t rush back. Let me know if you need any money. Everything is going great here.— Yours,
Frederick.

—no, it couldn’t be borne.

—no, it couldn't be tolerated.

“I don’t think I’ll come down to the village with you to-day,” she said, looking up at Lotty with eyes suddenly gone dim. “I think I want to think.”

“I don’t think I’ll go down to the village with you today,” she said, looking up at Lotty with eyes that had suddenly lost their brightness. “I think I want some time to myself.”

“All right,” said Lotty, at once starting off briskly down the path. “But don’t think too long,” she called back over her shoulder. “Write and invite him at once.”

"Okay," Lotty said, quickly heading down the path. "But don't take too long," she called back. "Write to him and invite him right away."

“Invite whom?” asked Rose, startled.

"Invite who?" asked Rose, startled.

“Your husband.”

“Your partner.”

Chapter 12

At the evening meal, which was the first time the whole four sat round the dining-room table together, Scrap appeared.

At dinner, which was the first time the four of them sat around the dining room table together, Scrap showed up.

She appeared quite punctually, and in one of those wrappers or tea-gowns which are sometimes described as ravishing. This one really was ravishing. It certainly ravished Mrs. Wilkins, who could not take her eyes off the enchanting figure opposite. It was a shell-pink garment, and clung to the adorable Scrap as though it, too, loved her.

She showed up right on time, wearing one of those wraps or tea gowns that are often called stunning. This one truly was stunning. It definitely captivated Mrs. Wilkins, who couldn't look away from the lovely figure in front of her. It was a shell-pink outfit that hugged the adorable Scrap as if it loved her too.

“What a beautiful dress!” exclaimed Mrs. Wilkins eagerly.

“What a beautiful dress!” Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed eagerly.

“What—this old rag?” said Scrap, glancing down at it as if to see which one she had got on. “I’ve had it a hundred years.” And she concentrated on her soup.

“What—this old rag?” Scrap said, looking down at it as if to check which one she was wearing. “I’ve had it for ages.” Then she focused back on her soup.

“You must be very cold in it,” said Mrs. Fisher, thin-lipped; for it showed a great deal of Scrap—the whole of her arms, for instance, and even where it covered her up it was so thin that you still saw her.

“You must be really cold in that,” said Mrs. Fisher, with thin lips; because it revealed a lot of skin—the entire length of her arms, for example, and even where it covered her up, it was so sheer that you could still see her.

“Who—me?” said Scrap, looking up a moment. “Oh, no.”

"Who—me?" Scrap said, looking up for a moment. "Oh, no."

And she continued her soup.

And she kept eating her soup.

“You mustn’t catch a chill, you know,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, feeling that such loveliness must at all costs be preserved unharmed. “There’s a great difference here when the sun goes down.”

“You shouldn’t catch a chill, you know,” said Mrs. Arbuthnot, believing that such beauty must be protected at all costs. “It’s really different here when the sun sets.”

“I’m quite warm,” said Scrap, industriously eating her soup.

“I’m really warm,” said Scrap, busily eating her soup.

“You look as if you had nothing at all on underneath,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“You look like you’re not wearing anything underneath,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“I haven’t. At least, hardly anything,” said Scrap, finishing her soup.

“I haven’t. At least, not much,” said Scrap, finishing her soup.

“How very imprudent,” said Mrs. Fisher, “and how highly improper.”

“How reckless,” Mrs. Fisher said, “and how completely inappropriate.”

Whereupon Scrap stared at her.

Then Scrap stared at her.

Mrs. Fisher had arrived at dinner feeling friendly towards Lady Caroline. She at least had not intruded into her room and sat at her table and written with her pen. She did, Mrs. Fisher had supposed, know how to behave. Now it appeared that she did not know, for was this behaving, to come dressed—no, undressed—like that to a meal? Such behaviour was not only exceedingly improper but also most inconsiderate, for the indelicate creature would certainly catch a chill, and then infect the entire party. Mrs. Fisher had a great objection to other people’s chills. They were always the fruit of folly; and then they were handed on to her, who had done nothing at all to deserve them.

Mrs. Fisher had come to dinner feeling friendly towards Lady Caroline. At least she hadn’t intruded into her room, sat at her table, and written with her pen. Mrs. Fisher thought she knew how to behave. Now it seemed that she didn’t, because was this really appropriate—showing up dressed—no, practically undressed—like that for a meal? Such behavior was not only extremely improper but also quite inconsiderate, as the inappropriate woman would definitely catch a chill and then spread it to the whole group. Mrs. Fisher was very against other people's chills. They were always the result of foolishness, and then they came to her, who had done nothing to deserve them.

“Bird-brained,” thought Mrs. Fisher, sternly contemplating Lady Caroline. “Not an idea in her head except vanity.”

“Airhead,” thought Mrs. Fisher, looking at Lady Caroline with disapproval. “She’s got nothing in her head except for vanity.”

“But there are no men here,” said Mrs. Wilkins, “so how can it be improper? Have you noticed,” she inquired of Mrs. Fisher, who endeavoured to pretend she did not hear, “how difficult it is to be improper without men?”

“But there are no men here,” Mrs. Wilkins said, “so how can it be inappropriate? Have you noticed,” she asked Mrs. Fisher, who tried to act like she didn’t hear, “how hard it is to be inappropriate without men?”

Mrs. Fisher neither answered her nor looked at her; but Scrap looked at her, and did that with her mouth which in any other mouth would have been a faint grin. Seen from without, across the bowl of nasturtiums, it was the most beautiful of brief and dimpled smiles.

Mrs. Fisher didn't respond to her or even glance her way; but Scrap did look at her and gave a slight grin that would seem faint on anyone else. From a distance, across the bowl of nasturtiums, it was the prettiest little smile with dimples.

She had a very alive sort of face, that one, thought Scrap, observing Mrs. Wilkins with a dawn of interest. It was rather like a field of corn swept by lights and shadows. Both she and the dark one, Scrap noticed, had changed their clothes, but only in order to put on silk jumpers. The same amount of trouble would have been enough to dress them properly, reflected Scrap. Naturally they looked like nothing on earth in the jumpers. It didn’t matter what Mrs. Fisher wore; indeed, the only thing for her, short of plumes and ermine, was what she did wear. But these others were quite young still, and quite attractive. They really definitely had faces. How different life would be for them if they made the most of themselves instead of the least. And yet—Scrap was suddenly bored, and turned away her thoughts and absently ate toast. What did it matter? If you did make the best of yourself, you only collected people round you who ended by wanting to grab.

She had a really expressive face, thought Scrap, watching Mrs. Wilkins with newfound interest. It was kind of like a cornfield bathed in light and shadow. Scrap noticed that both she and the other dark-haired woman had changed into clothes, but only to wear silk jumpers. They could have put in the same effort to dress properly, Scrap thought. Naturally, they looked ridiculous in those jumpers. It didn’t really matter what Mrs. Fisher wore; honestly, the only thing better for her than the plumes and ermine was what she actually wore. But these other two were still quite young and pretty. They really had distinct faces. Life would be so different for them if they embraced their potential instead of hiding it. And yet—Scrap suddenly felt bored and turned her attention away, munching on her toast absently. What did it even matter? If you did try to put your best foot forward, all you did was attract people who wanted to take advantage.

“I’ve had the most wonderful day,” began Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes shining.

"I’ve had the most amazing day," said Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes sparkling.

Scrap lowered hers. “Oh,” she thought, “she’s going to gush.”

Scrap lowered hers. “Oh,” she thought, “she’s about to get really emotional.”

“As though anybody were interested in her day,” thought Mrs. Fisher, lowering hers also.

“As if anyone actually cared about her day,” thought Mrs. Fisher, lowering hers too.

In fact, whenever Mrs. Wilkins spoke Mrs. Fisher deliberately cast down her eyes. Thus would she mark her disapproval. Besides, it seemed the only safe thing to do with her eyes, for no one could tell what the uncurbed creature would say next. That which she had just said, for instance, about men—addressed too, to her—what could she mean? Better not conjecture, thought Mrs. Fisher; and her eyes, though cast down, yet saw Lady Caroline stretch out her hand to the Chianti flask and fill her glass again.

Whenever Mrs. Wilkins spoke, Mrs. Fisher would intentionally look away. This was her way of showing disapproval. Besides, it seemed like the safest option for her eyes, since no one could predict what the wild woman would say next. Take what she just said about men, for example—directed at her, no less—what could she mean? Better not to guess, Mrs. Fisher thought; and even as her eyes were lowered, she watched Lady Caroline reach for the Chianti bottle and fill her glass again.

Again. She had done it once already, and the fish was only just going out of the room. Mrs. Fisher could see that the other respectable member of the party, Mrs. Arbuthnot, was noticing it too. Mrs. Arbuthnot was, she hoped and believed, respectable and well-meaning. It is true she also had invaded her sitting-room, but no doubt she had been dragged there by the other one, and Mrs. Fisher had little if anything against Mrs. Arbuthnot, and observed with approval that she only drank water. That was as it should be. So, indeed, to give her her dues, did the freckled one; and very right at their age. She herself drank wine, but with what moderation: one meal, one glass. And she was sixty-five, and might properly, and even beneficially, have had at least two.

Again. She had done it once before, and the fish was just leaving the room. Mrs. Fisher noticed that the other respectable member of the group, Mrs. Arbuthnot, was noticing it too. Mrs. Arbuthnot was, she hoped and believed, respectable and well-meaning. It’s true she had also entered her sitting room, but surely she had been brought there by the other one, and Mrs. Fisher had little to no issues with Mrs. Arbuthnot, noticing with approval that she only drank water. That was how it should be. To give her credit, the freckled one did the same; and very rightly so at their age. She herself drank wine, but with moderation: one meal, one glass. And she was sixty-five, and could rightly, and even beneficially, have had at least two.

“That,” she said to Lady Caroline, cutting right across what Mrs. Wilkins was telling them about her wonderful day and indicating the wine-glass, “is very bad for you.”

“That's not good for you,” she said to Lady Caroline, interrupting what Mrs. Wilkins was saying about her amazing day and pointing to the wine glass.

Lady Caroline, however, could not have heard, for she continued to sip, her elbow on the table, and listen to what Mrs. Wilkins was saying.

Lady Caroline, however, must not have heard, because she kept sipping, her elbow on the table, and listening to what Mrs. Wilkins was saying.

And what was it she was saying? She had invited somebody to come and stay? A man?

And what was she saying? She had invited someone to come and stay? A guy?

Mrs. Fisher could not credit her ears. Yet it evidently was a man, for she spoke of the person as he.

Mrs. Fisher couldn't believe what she was hearing. But it was clearly a man, since she referred to him as he.

Suddenly and for the first time—but then this was most important—Mrs. Fisher addressed Mrs. Wilkins directly. She was sixty-five, and cared very little what sorts of women she happened to be with for a month, but if the women were to be mixed with men it was a different proposition altogether. She was not going to be made a cat’s-paw of. She had not come out there to sanction by her presence what used in her day to be called fast behaviour. Nothing had been said at the interview in London about men; if there had been she would have declined, of course, to come.

Suddenly, and for the first time—but this was the most important part—Mrs. Fisher spoke directly to Mrs. Wilkins. She was sixty-five and didn’t care much about the kinds of women she spent a month with, but mixing with men was a completely different story. She wasn’t going to let herself be used. She hadn’t come out there to approve by her presence of what used to be called reckless behavior in her day. Nothing had been mentioned during the meeting in London about men; if it had been, she would have definitely refused to come.

“What is his name?” asked Mrs. Fisher, abruptly interposing.

“What’s his name?” asked Mrs. Fisher, cutting in suddenly.

Mrs. Wilkins turned to her with a slight surprise. “Wilkins,” she said.

Mrs. Wilkins turned to her with a bit of surprise. “Wilkins,” she said.

“Wilkins?”

“Wilkins?”

“Yes.”

"Yep."

“Your name?”

"What's your name?"

“And his.”

"And his."

“A relation?”

“A relationship?”

“Not blood.”

“Not related.”

“A connection?”

"Is there a connection?"

“A husband.”

“A husband.”

Mrs. Fisher once more cast down her eyes. She could not talk to Mrs. Wilkins. There was something about the things she said. . . “A husband.” Suggesting one of many. Always that unseemly twist to everything. Why could she not say “My husband”? Besides, Mrs. Fisher had, she herself knew not for what reason, taken both the Hampstead young women for widows. War ones. There had been an absence of mention of husbands at the interview which would not, she considered, be natural if such persons did after all exist. And if a husband was not a relation, who was? “Not blood.” What a way to talk. Why, a husband was the first of all relations. How well she remembered Ruskin—no, it was not Ruskin, it was the Bible that said a man should leave his father and mother and cleave only to his wife; showing that she became by marriage an even more than blood relation. And if the husband’s father and mother were to be nothing to him compared to his wife, how much less than nothing ought the wife’s father and mother be to her compared to her husband. She herself had been unable to leave her father and mother in order to cleave to Mr. Fisher because they were no longer, when she married, alive, but she certainly would have left them if they had been there to leave. Not blood, indeed. Silly talk.

Mrs. Fisher looked down again. She couldn't talk to Mrs. Wilkins. There was something about the things she said... “A husband.” It implied one of many. There was always that uncomfortable twist to everything. Why couldn't she just say “My husband”? On top of that, Mrs. Fisher had, for some reason she couldn't explain, assumed both the Hampstead women were widows. War widows. There hadn’t been any mention of husbands during their conversation, which she thought wasn’t natural if those people actually existed. And if a husband wasn’t a relative, then who was? “Not blood.” What a way to talk. A husband is the most important relative of all. She remembered well—it wasn’t Ruskin, it was the Bible that said a man should leave his father and mother and cling only to his wife, showing that she became an even more significant relation than blood. If a husband’s parents were to mean nothing to him compared to his wife, then how much less should the wife’s parents mean to her compared to her husband? She herself hadn’t been able to leave her parents to cling to Mr. Fisher because they were no longer alive when she married, but she definitely would have left them if they had been there. Not blood, indeed. Silly talk.

The dinner was very good. Succulence succeeded succulence. Costanza had determined to do as she chose in the matter of cream and eggs the first week, and see what happened at the end of it when the bills had to be paid. Her experience of the English was that they were quiet about bills. They were shy of words. They believed readily. Besides, who was the mistress here? In the absence of a definite one, it occurred to Costanza that she might as well be the mistress herself. So she did as she chose about the dinner, and it was very good.

The dinner was fantastic. Each dish was more delicious than the last. Costanza decided to do whatever she wanted with cream and eggs for the first week and see what happened when it was time to settle the bills. From her experience, she found the English to be reserved about expenses. They hesitated to speak up. They were quick to believe. Besides, who was in charge here? Since there wasn’t a clear authority, Costanza figured she might as well take on that role herself. So, she made her own choices about the dinner, and it turned out great.

The four, however, were so much preoccupied by their own conversation that they ate it without noticing how good it was. Even Mrs. Fisher, she who in such matters was manly, did not notice. The entire excellent cooking was to her as though it were not; which shows how much she must have been stirred.

The four of them were so caught up in their own conversation that they ate without realizing how good the food was. Even Mrs. Fisher, who was usually quite perceptive about these things, didn’t notice. The fantastic cooking might as well have not existed for her, which shows how much she must have been affected.

She was stirred. It was that Mrs. Wilkins. She was enough to stir anybody. And she was undoubtedly encouraged by Lady Caroline, who, in her turn, was no doubt influenced by the Chianti.

She was excited. It was Mrs. Wilkins. She could stir anyone up. And she was definitely backed by Lady Caroline, who, in turn, was probably influenced by the Chianti.

Mrs. Fisher was very glad there were no men present, for they certainly would have been foolish about Lady Caroline. She was precisely the sort of young woman to unbalance them; especially, Mrs. Fisher recognised, at that moment. Perhaps it was the Chianti momentarily intensifying her personality, but she was undeniably most attractive; and there were few things Mrs. Fisher disliked more than having to look on while sensible, intelligent men, who the moment before were talking seriously and interestingly about real matters, became merely foolish and simpering—she had seen them actually simpering—just because in walked a bit of bird-brained beauty. Even Mr. Gladstone, that great wise statesman, whose hand had once rested for an unforgettable moment solemnly on her head, would have, she felt, on perceiving Lady Caroline left off talking sense and horribly embarked on badinage.

Mrs. Fisher was really glad there were no men around, because they definitely would have acted foolishly around Lady Caroline. She was exactly the kind of young woman who could throw them off balance; especially, Mrs. Fisher realized, at that moment. Maybe it was the Chianti enhancing her personality, but she was undeniably very attractive; and there were few things Mrs. Fisher disliked more than having to watch sensible, intelligent men—who had just been talking seriously and interestingly about important stuff—turn into silly and smirking fools—she had actually seen them smirking—just because a pretty but airheaded girl walked in. Even Mr. Gladstone, that great wise statesman, whose hand had once rested for an unforgettable moment solemnly on her head, she felt would have stopped talking sensibly and horrifically started joking around as soon as he noticed Lady Caroline.

“You see,” Mrs. Wilkins said—a silly trick that, with which she mostly began her sentences; Mrs. Fisher each time wished to say, “Pardon me—I do not see, I hear”—but why trouble?—“You see,” said Mrs. Wilkins, leaning across towards Lady Caroline, “we arranged, didn’t we, in London that if any of us wanted to we could each invite one guest. So now I’m doing it.”

“You see,” Mrs. Wilkins said—this was a silly habit she mostly used to start her sentences; Mrs. Fisher felt like saying, “Excuse me—I can’t see, I can only hear”—but why bother?—“You see,” said Mrs. Wilkins, leaning toward Lady Caroline, “we agreed in London that if any of us wanted to, we could each invite one guest. So now I’m doing it.”

“I don’t remember that,” said Mrs. Fisher, her eyes on her plate.

“I don’t remember that,” Mrs. Fisher said, staring at her plate.

“Oh yes, we did—didn’t we, Rose?”

“Oh yes, we did—didn’t we, Rose?”

“Yes—I remember,” said Lady Caroline. “Only it seemed so incredible that one could ever want to. One’s whole idea was to get away from one’s friends.”

“Yes—I remember,” Lady Caroline said. “It just seemed so unbelievable that anyone would ever want to. The whole point was to distance oneself from friends.”

“And one’s husbands.”

“And one’s husbands.”

Again that unseemly plural. But how altogether unseemly, thought Mrs. Fisher. Such implications. Mrs. Arbuthnot clearly thought so too, for she had turned red.

Again that awkward plural. But how completely awkward, thought Mrs. Fisher. Such implications. Mrs. Arbuthnot clearly thought so too, because she had turned red.

“And family affection,” said Lady Caroline—or was it the Chianti speaking? Surely it was the Chianti.

“And family affection,” said Lady Caroline—or was it the Chianti talking? Surely it was the Chianti.

“And the want of family affection,” said Mrs. Wilkins—what a light she was throwing on her home life and real character.

“And the lack of family affection,” said Mrs. Wilkins—what a revelation she was making about her home life and true character.

“That wouldn’t be so bad,” said Lady Caroline. “I’d stay with that. It would give one room.”

"That wouldn't be so bad," Lady Caroline said. "I'd be okay with that. It would give me some space."

“Oh no, no—it’s dreadful,” cried Mrs. Wilkins. “It’s as if one had no clothes on.”

“Oh no, no—it’s awful,” cried Mrs. Wilkins. “It’s like being completely naked.”

“But I like that,” said Lady Caroline.

“But I like that,” said Lady Caroline.

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Seriously—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“It’s a divine feeling, getting rid of things,” said Lady Caroline, who was talking altogether to Mrs. Wilkins and paid no attention to the other two.

“It’s such a freeing feeling to declutter,” said Lady Caroline, who was completely focused on Mrs. Wilkins and ignored the other two.

“Oh, but in a bitter wind to have nothing on and know there never will be anything on and you going to get colder and colder till at last you die of it—that’s what it was like, living with somebody who didn’t love one.”

“Oh, but to be out in a freezing wind with nothing on and know there will never be anything on, and you’re just going to get colder and colder until you eventually die from it—that’s what it was like, living with someone who didn’t love you.”

These confidences, thought Mrs. Fisher . . . and no excuse whatever for Mrs. Wilkins, who was making them entirely on plain water. Mrs. Arbuthnot, judging from her face, quite shared Mrs. Fisher’s disapproval; she was fidgeting.

These secrets, Mrs. Fisher thought... and no excuse at all for Mrs. Wilkins, who was making them entirely with just plain water. Mrs. Arbuthnot, judging by her expression, completely shared Mrs. Fisher’s disapproval; she was restless.

“But didn’t he?” asked Lady Caroline—every bit as shamelessly unreticent as Mrs. Wilkins.

“But didn’t he?” asked Lady Caroline—just as shamelessly open as Mrs. Wilkins.

“Mellersh? He showed no signs of it.”

“Mellersh? He didn’t show any signs of it.”

“Delicious,” murmured Lady Caroline.

“Delicious,” Lady Caroline murmured.

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Seriously—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“I didn’t think it was at all delicious. I was miserable. And now, since I’ve been here, I simply stare at myself being miserable. As miserable as that. And about Mellersh.”

“I didn’t think it was delicious at all. I was miserable. And now, since I’ve been here, I just stare at myself being miserable. As miserable as that. And about Mellersh.”

“You mean he wasn’t worth it.”

“You mean he wasn’t worth it.”

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher.

"Seriously—" said Mrs. Fisher.

“No, I don’t. I mean I’ve suddenly got well.”

“No, I don’t. I mean I just suddenly got better.”

Lady Caroline, slowly twisting the stem of her glass in her fingers, scrutinised the lit-up face opposite.

Lady Caroline, slowly twisting the stem of her glass in her fingers, examined the illuminated face across from her.

“And now I’m well I find I can’t sit here and gloat all to myself. I can’t be happy, shutting him out. I must share. I understand exactly what the Blessed Damozel felt like.”

“And now that I’m alright, I realize I can’t just sit here and gloat by myself. I can’t be happy while excluding him. I need to share. I completely understand how the Blessed Damozel felt.”

“What was the Blessed Damozel?” asked Scrap.

“What was the Blessed Damozel?” asked Scrap.

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher; and with such emphasis this time that Lady Caroline turned to her.

“Seriously—” said Mrs. Fisher, and with such emphasis this time that Lady Caroline turned to her.

“Ought I to know?” she asked. “I don’t know any natural history. It sounds like a bird.”

“Should I know?” she asked. “I don’t know anything about natural history. It sounds like a bird.”

“It is a poem,” said Mrs. Fisher with extraordinary frost.

“It’s a poem,” said Mrs. Fisher coldly.

“Oh,” said Scrap.

“Oh,” Scrap said.

“I’ll lend it to you,” said Mrs. Wilkins, over whose face laughter rippled.

“I’ll lend it to you,” said Mrs. Wilkins, laughter spreading across her face.

“No,” said Scrap.

“No,” Scrap replied.

“And its author,” said Mrs. Fisher icily, “though not perhaps quite what one would have wished him to be, was frequently at my father’s table.”

“And its author,” said Mrs. Fisher coldly, “even though he may not have been exactly what one would have preferred, often sat at my father’s table.”

“What a bore for you,” said Scrap. “That’s what mother’s always doing—inviting authors. I hate authors. I wouldn’t mind them so much if they didn’t write books. Go on about Mellersh,” she said, turning to Mrs. Wilkins.

"What a drag for you," said Scrap. "That's what moms always do—inviting writers. I can't stand writers. I wouldn't mind them as much if they didn't write books. Go on about Mellersh," she said, turning to Mrs. Wilkins.

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Seriously—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“All those empty beds,” said Mrs. Wilkins.

"All those empty beds," Mrs. Wilkins said.

“What empty beds?” asked Scrap.

“What empty beds?” Scrap asked.

“The ones in this house. Why, of course they each ought to have somebody happy inside them. Eight beds, and only four people. It’s dreadful, dreadful to be so greedy and keep everything just for oneself. I want Rose to ask her husband out too. You and Mrs. Fisher haven’t got husbands, but why not give some friend a glorious time?”

“The ones in this house. Of course, they all should have someone joyful inside them. Eight beds, and only four people. It’s awful, really awful to be so selfish and keep everything just for yourself. I want Rose to invite her husband out too. You and Mrs. Fisher don’t have husbands, but why not let a friend have an amazing time?”

Rose bit her lip. She turned red, she turned pale. If only Lotty would keep quiet, she thought. It was all very well to have suddenly become a saint and want to love everybody, but need she be so tactless? Rose felt that all her poor sore places were being danced on. If only Lotty would keep quiet . . .

Rose bit her lip. She flushed and then went pale. If only Lotty would just shut up, she thought. It was great that she had suddenly become a saint and wanted to love everyone, but did she have to be so insensitive? Rose felt like all her painful spots were being trampled on. If only Lotty would keep quiet . . .

And Mrs. Fisher, with even greater frostiness than that with which she had received Lady Caroline’s ignorance of the Blessed Damozel, said, “There is only one unoccupied bedroom in this house.”

And Mrs. Fisher, even colder than when she had responded to Lady Caroline's lack of knowledge about the Blessed Damozel, said, “There's only one vacant bedroom in this house.”

“Only one?” echoed Mrs. Wilkins, astonished. “Then who are in all the others?”

“Only one?” Mrs. Wilkins exclaimed, surprised. “Then who’s in all the others?”

“We are,” said Mrs. Fisher.

"We are," Mrs. Fisher said.

“But we’re not in all the bedrooms. There must be at least six. That leaves two over, and the owner told us there were eight beds—didn’t he Rose?”

“But we’re not in all the bedrooms. There must be at least six. That leaves two extra, and the owner told us there were eight beds—didn’t he, Rose?”

“There are six bedrooms,” said Mrs. Fisher; for both she and Lady Caroline had thoroughly searched the house on arriving, in order to see which part of it they would be most comfortable in, and they both knew that there were six bedrooms, two of which were very small, and in one of these small ones Francesca slept in the company of a chair and a chest of drawers, and the other, similarly furnished, was empty.

“There are six bedrooms,” said Mrs. Fisher. Both she and Lady Caroline had thoroughly searched the house upon arriving to see which part would be the most comfortable for them. They knew there were six bedrooms, two of which were very small. In one of these small rooms, Francesca slept with just a chair and a chest of drawers, while the other, similarly furnished, was empty.

Mrs. Wilkins and Mrs. Arbuthnot had hardly looked at the house, having spent most of their time out-of-doors gaping at the scenery, and had, in the agitated inattentiveness of their minds when first they began negotiating for San Salvatore, got into their heads that the eight beds of which the owner spoke were the same as eight bedrooms; which they were not. There were indeed eight beds, but four of them were in Mrs. Wilkins’s and Mrs. Arbuthnot’s rooms.

Mrs. Wilkins and Mrs. Arbuthnot barely paid attention to the house, spending most of their time outside staring at the scenery. In the rushed distraction of their minds when they first started dealing for San Salvatore, they mistakenly thought the eight beds the owner mentioned were the same as eight separate bedrooms, which they weren’t. There were indeed eight beds, but four of them were in the rooms of Mrs. Wilkins and Mrs. Arbuthnot.

“There are six bedrooms,” repeated Mrs. Fisher. “We have four, Francesca has the fifth, and the sixth is empty.”

“There are six bedrooms,” Mrs. Fisher repeated. “We have four, Francesca has the fifth, and the sixth one is empty.”

“So that,” said Scrap, “however kind we feel we would be if we could, we can’t. Isn’t it fortunate?”

“So, Scrap said, ‘No matter how kind we want to be if we could, we can’t. Isn’t that lucky?’”

“But then there’s only room for one?” said Mrs. Wilkins, looking round at the three faces.

“But then there’s only room for one?” Mrs. Wilkins said, glancing at the three faces.

“Yes—and you’ve got him,” said Scrap.

“Yes—and you’ve got him,” Scrap said.

Mrs. Wilkins was taken aback. This question of the beds was unexpected. In inviting Mellersh she had intended to put him in one of the four spare-rooms that she imagined were there. When there were plenty of rooms and enough servants there was no reason why they should, as they did in their small, two-servanted house at home, share the same one. Love, even universal love, the kind of love with which she felt herself flooded, should not be tried. Much patience and self-effacement were needed for successful married sleep. Placidity; a steady faith; these too were needed. She was sure she would be much fonder of Mellersh, and he not mind her nearly so much, if they were not shut up together at night, if in the morning they could meet with the cheery affection of friends between whom lies no shadow of differences about the window or the washing arrangements, or of absurd little choked-down resentments at something that had seemed to one of them unfair. Her happiness, she felt, and her ability to be friends with everybody, was the result of her sudden new freedom and its peace. Would there be that sense of freedom, that peace, after a night shut up with Mellersh? Would she be able in the morning to be full towards him, as she was at that moment full, of nothing at all but loving-kindness? After all, she hadn’t been very long in heaven. Suppose she hadn’t been in it long enough for her to have become fixed in blandness? And only that morning what an extraordinary joy it had been to find herself alone when she woke, and able to pull the bed-clothes any way she liked!

Mrs. Wilkins was surprised. This question about the beds caught her off guard. When she invited Mellersh, she had planned to put him in one of the four spare rooms she thought were available. When there were plenty of rooms and enough staff, there was no reason they should, like in their small house at home with just two servants, share a room. Love, even the universal kind she felt overflowing in her, shouldn’t have to be put to the test. It required a lot of patience and selflessness for a successful married life. Calmness and steady faith were necessary too. She was sure she would like Mellersh much more, and he wouldn’t mind her nearly as much, if they weren’t confined together at night. In the morning, they could greet each other as cheerful friends, free from any petty arguments over windows or laundry or the small, suppressed grievances that one of them might feel was unfair. She believed her happiness and ability to connect with others stemmed from her newfound freedom and its tranquility. Would that sense of freedom and peace still be there after a night alone with Mellersh? Would she be able to interact with him in the morning with the same warmth she felt in that moment, full of nothing but kindness? After all, she hadn’t been in this blissful state for very long. What if she hadn’t been there long enough to fully settle into this calm? And that morning, how wonderful it had been to wake up alone, able to rearrange the bed covers however she wanted!

Francesca had to nudge her. She was so much absorbed that she did not notice the pudding.

Francesca had to nudge her. She was so absorbed that she didn't notice the pudding.

“If,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, distractedly helping herself, “I share my room with Mellersh I risk losing all I now feel about him. If on the other hand I put him in the one spare-room, I prevent Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline from giving somebody a treat. True they don’t seem to want to at present, but at any moment in this place one or the other of them may be seized with a desire to make somebody happy, and then they wouldn’t be able to because of Mellersh.”

“If,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, distractedly serving herself, “if I share my room with Mellersh, I risk losing everything I currently feel for him. On the other hand, if I put him in the spare room, I stop Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline from giving someone a treat. Sure, they don’t seem interested at the moment, but at any time here, either one of them could suddenly want to make someone happy, and then they wouldn’t be able to because of Mellersh.”

“What a problem,” she said aloud, her eyebrows puckered.

"What a problem," she said, her eyebrows knitted together.

“What is?” asked Scrap.

“What’s that?” asked Scrap.

“Where to put Mellersh.”

"Where to place Mellersh."

Scrap stared. “Why, isn’t one room enough for him?” she asked.

Scrap stared. “Isn’t one room enough for him?” she asked.

“Oh yes, quite. But then there won’t be any room left at all—any room for somebody you may want to invite.”

“Oh yes, definitely. But then there won’t be any space left at all—no space for someone you might want to invite.”

“I shan’t want to,” said Scrap.

“I don’t want to,” said Scrap.

“Or you,” said Mrs. Wilkins to Mrs. Fisher. “Rose, of course, doesn’t count. I’m sure she would like sharing her room with her husband. It’s written all over her.”

“Or you,” said Mrs. Wilkins to Mrs. Fisher. “Rose, of course, doesn’t count. I’m sure she would love sharing her room with her husband. It’s obvious.”

“Really—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Seriously—” said Mrs. Fisher.

“Really what?” asked Mrs. Wilkins, turning hopefully to her, for she thought the word this time was the preliminary to a helpful suggestion.

“Really what?” asked Mrs. Wilkins, turning hopefully to her, because she thought this word was a hint at a helpful suggestion.

It was not. It stood by itself. It was, as before, mere frost.

It wasn't. It stood alone. It was, just like before, just frost.

Challenged, however, Mrs. Fisher did fasten it on to a sentence. “Really am I to understand,” she asked, “that you propose to reserve the one spare-room for the exclusive use of your own family?”

Challenged, however, Mrs. Fisher did attach it to a sentence. “Am I really to understand,” she asked, “that you plan to reserve the one spare room exclusively for your own family?”

“He isn’t my own family,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “He’s my husband. You see—”

“He isn’t my own family,” said Mrs. Wilkins. “He’s my husband. You see—”

“I see nothing,” Mrs. Fisher could not this time refrain from interrupting—for what an intolerable trick. “At the most I hear, and that reluctantly.”

“I see nothing,” Mrs. Fisher couldn't hold back from interrupting this time—what an awful trick. “At best, I hear, and that only with reluctance.”

But Mrs. Wilkins, as impervious to rebuke as Mrs. Fisher had feared, immediately repeated the tiresome formula and launched out into a long and excessively indelicate speech about the best place for the person she called Mellersh to sleep in.

But Mrs. Wilkins, completely unfazed by criticism as Mrs. Fisher had worried, immediately repeated the annoying routine and started into a long and overly crude speech about the best place for the person she referred to as Mellersh to sleep.

Mellersh—Mrs. Fisher, remembering the Thomases and Johns and Alfreds and Roberts of her day, plain names that yet had all become glorious, thought it sheer affectation to be christened Mellersh—was, it seemed, Mrs. Wilkins’s husband, and therefore his place was clearly indicated. Why this talk? She herself, as if foreseeing his arrival, had had a second bed put in Mrs. Wilkins’s room. There were certain things in life which were never talked about but only done. Most things connected with husbands were not talked about; and to have a whole dinner-table taken up with a discussion as to where one of them should sleep was an affront to the decencies. How and where husbands slept should be known only to their wives. Sometimes it was not known to them, and then the marriage had less happy moments; but these moments were not talked about either; the decencies continued to be preserved. At least, it was so in her day. To have to hear whether Mr. Wilkins should or should not sleep with Mrs. Wilkins, and the reasons why he should and the reasons why he shouldn’t, was both uninteresting and indelicate.

Mellersh—Mrs. Fisher, remembering the Thomases, Johns, Alfreds, and Roberts from her time, plain names that had become significant, thought it was just pretentious to be called Mellersh—was, it seemed, Mrs. Wilkins’s husband, and so his position was clear. Why all this talk? She had even anticipated his arrival by putting a second bed in Mrs. Wilkins’s room. There are certain things in life that are never discussed, only done. Most topics related to husbands aren't talked about, and having a whole dinner table discussing where one of them should sleep was a violation of decency. How and where husbands sleep should only be known to their wives. Sometimes they aren’t even aware, which can lead to less happy moments in the marriage; but those moments weren't discussed either; the decency was still upheld. At least, that was how it was in her time. Hearing whether Mr. Wilkins should sleep with Mrs. Wilkins, along with all the reasons for and against, was both boring and inappropriate.

She might have succeeded in imposing propriety and changing the conversation if it had not been for Lady Caroline. Lady Caroline encouraged Mrs. Wilkins, and threw herself into the discussion with every bit as much unreserve as Mrs. Wilkins herself. No doubt she was impelled on this occasion by Chianti, but whatever the reason there it was. And, characteristically, Lady Caroline was all for Mr. Wilkins being given the solitary spare-room. She took that for granted. Any other arrangement would be impossible, she said; her expression was, “Barbarous.” Had she never read her Bible, Mrs. Fisher was tempted to inquire—And they two shall be one flesh? Clearly also, then, one room. But Mrs. Fisher did not inquire. She did not care even to allude to such texts to some one unmarried.

She might have managed to maintain decorum and shift the conversation if it hadn't been for Lady Caroline. Lady Caroline supported Mrs. Wilkins and joined the discussion with just as much openness as Mrs. Wilkins herself. She was undoubtedly influenced by the Chianti, but whatever the reason, there it was. And, true to form, Lady Caroline insisted that Mr. Wilkins should have the only spare room. She took that as a given. Any other arrangement would be out of the question, she said; her expression was one of disgust. Had she never read her Bible, Mrs. Fisher was tempted to ask—And they two shall be one flesh? Clearly, that implied one room. But Mrs. Fisher didn’t ask. She didn't even want to mention such verses to someone who was unmarried.

However, there was one way she could force Mr. Wilkins into his proper place and save the situation: she could say she herself intended to invite a friend. It was her right. They had all said so. Apart from propriety, it was monstrous that Mrs. Wilkins should want to monopolise the one spare-room, when in her own room was everything necessary for her husband. Perhaps she really would invite somebody—not invite, but suggest coming. There was Kate Lumley, for instance. Kate could perfectly afford to come and pay her share; and she was of her own period and knew, and had known, most of the people she herself knew and had known. Kate, of course, had only been on the fringe; she used to be asked only to the big parties, not to the small ones, and she still was only on the fringe. There were some people who never got off the fringe, and Kate was one. Often, however, such people were more permanently agreeable to be with than the others, in that they remained grateful.

However, there was one way she could put Mr. Wilkins in his place and fix the situation: she could say she planned to invite a friend. It was her right. Everyone had agreed on that. Besides being proper, it was ridiculous that Mrs. Wilkins should want to monopolize the only spare room when her own room had everything her husband needed. Maybe she really would invite someone—not formally invite, but suggest coming over. There was Kate Lumley, for example. Kate could easily afford to come and pay her share; she was from the same time period and knew, and had known, most of the people she was familiar with. Kate had only ever been on the outskirts; she used to get invited only to the big parties, not the small ones, and she still remained on the outskirts. Some people never made it off the fringes, and Kate was one of them. However, often, such people were more enjoyable to be around than others because they remained grateful.

Yes; she might really consider Kate. The poor soul had never married, but then everybody could not expect to marry, and she was quite comfortably off—not too comfortably, but just comfortably enough to pay her own expenses if she came and yet be grateful. Yes; Kate was the solution. If she came, at one stroke, Mrs. Fisher saw, would the Wilkinses be regularised and Mrs. Wilkins be prevented from having more than her share of the rooms. Also, Mrs. Fisher would save herself from isolation; spiritual isolation. She desired physical isolation between meals, but she disliked that isolation which is of the spirit. Such isolation would, she feared, certainly be hers with these three alien-minded young women. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot was, owing to her friendship with Mrs. Wilkins, necessarily alien-minded. In Kate she would have a support. Kate, without intruding on her sitting-room, for Kate was tractable, would be there at meals to support her.

Yes; she might really think about Kate. The poor thing had never married, but not everyone can expect to marry, and she was doing quite well—maybe not extremely well, but well enough to cover her own expenses if she joined them and still be grateful. Yes; Kate was the answer. If she came, it would instantly solve things, Mrs. Fisher realized, allowing the Wilkinses to have their arrangements in order and keeping Mrs. Wilkins from taking more than her fair share of the rooms. Plus, Mrs. Fisher would avoid feeling isolated; spiritual isolation. She wanted physical space between meals, but she didn’t like that kind of isolation that affects the spirit. She worried that this kind of isolation was what she would face with those three women from different backgrounds. Even Mrs. Arbuthnot, because of her friendship with Mrs. Wilkins, was necessarily distant. With Kate, she would have a support. Kate, without crowding her sitting room—since Kate was easygoing—would be there at meals to back her up.

Mrs. Fisher said nothing at the moment; but presently in the drawing-room, when they were gathered round the wood fire—she had discovered there was no fireplace in her own sitting-room, and therefore she would after all be forced, so long as the evenings remained cool, to spend them in the other room—presently, while Francesca was handing coffee round and Lady Caroline was poisoning the air with smoke, Mrs. Wilkins, looking relieved and pleased, said: “Well, if nobody really wants that room, and wouldn’t use it anyhow, I shall be very glad if Mellersh may have it.”

Mrs. Fisher didn't say anything at that moment; but later, in the living room, as they gathered around the wood fire—she had found out there was no fireplace in her own sitting room, so she would ultimately have to spend her evenings in the other room for as long as the nights stayed cool—while Francesca was serving coffee and Lady Caroline was filling the air with smoke, Mrs. Wilkins, looking relieved and happy, said: “Well, if nobody really wants that room, and no one would use it anyway, I’d be very glad if Mellersh could have it.”

“Of course he must have it,” said Lady Caroline.

“Of course he has to have it,” said Lady Caroline.

Then Mrs. Fisher spoke.

Then Mrs. Fisher said.

“I have a friend,” she said in her deep voice; and sudden silence fell upon the others.

“I have a friend,” she said in her deep voice, and an immediate silence descended on the others.

“Kate Lumley,” said Mrs. Fisher.

"Kate Lumley," Mrs. Fisher said.

Nobody spoke.

No one spoke.

“Perhaps,” continued Mrs. Fisher, addressing Lady Caroline, “you know her?”

“Maybe,” Mrs. Fisher said to Lady Caroline, “you know her?”

No, Lady Caroline did not know Kate Lumley; and Mrs. Fisher, without asking the others if they did, for she was sure they knew no one, proceeded. “I wish to invite her to join me,” said Mrs. Fisher.

No, Lady Caroline didn't know Kate Lumley; and Mrs. Fisher, without checking if the others did, because she was certain they didn't know anyone, continued. “I want to invite her to come with me,” said Mrs. Fisher.

Complete silence.

Complete silence.

Then Scrap said, turning to Mrs. Wilkins, “That settles Mellersh, then.”

Then Scrap said, turning to Mrs. Wilkins, “That takes care of Mellersh, then.”

“It settles the question of Mr. Wilkins,” said Mrs. Fisher, “although I am unable to understand that there should ever have been a question, in the only way that is right.”

“It resolves the issue of Mr. Wilkins,” said Mrs. Fisher, “even though I can’t grasp why there was ever an issue in the first place, in the only way that makes sense.”

“I’m afraid you’re in for it, then,” said Lady Caroline, again to Mrs. Wilkins. “Unless,” she added, “he can’t come.”

“I’m afraid you’re in trouble then,” said Lady Caroline, again addressing Mrs. Wilkins. “Unless,” she added, “he can’t make it.”

But Mrs. Wilkins, her brow perturbed—for suppose after all she were not yet quite stable in heaven?—could only say, a little uneasily, “I see him here.”

But Mrs. Wilkins, her brow furrowed—what if she wasn’t fully settled in heaven yet?—could only say, a little uneasily, “I see him here.”

Chapter 13

The uneventful days—only outwardly uneventful—slipped by in floods of sunshine, and the servants, watching the four ladies, came to the conclusion there was very little life in them.

The seemingly dull days—only on the surface—passed by in streams of sunlight, and the staff, observing the four women, concluded that there wasn’t much vitality in them.

To the servants San Salvatore seemed asleep. No one came to tea, nor did the ladies go anywhere to tea. Other tenants in other springs had been far more active. There had been stir and enterprise; the boat had been used; excursions had been made; Beppo’s fly was ordered; people from Mezzago came over and spent the day; the house rang with voices; even sometimes champagne had been drunk. Life was varied, life was interesting. But this? What was this? The servants were not even scolded. They were left completely to themselves. They yawned.

To the servants, San Salvatore seemed to be asleep. No one came to tea, and the ladies didn’t go anywhere for tea either. Other tenants in previous springs were much more lively. There had been activity and enthusiasm; the boat had been used; excursions had taken place; Beppo’s fly had been called for; people from Mezzago visited and spent the day; the house was filled with voices; sometimes, they even drank champagne. Life was diverse, life was exciting. But this? What was this? The servants weren’t even scolded. They were left completely on their own. They yawned.

Perplexing, too, was the entire absence of gentlemen. How could gentlemen keep away from so much beauty? For, added up, and even after the subtraction of the old one, the three younger ladies produced a formidable total of that which gentlemen usually sought.

It was also confusing that there were no gentlemen around. How could they resist being near so much beauty? Even after factoring out the older woman, the three younger ladies together were an impressive amount of what gentlemen typically looked for.

Also the evident desire of each lady to spend long hours separated from the other ladies puzzled the servants. The result was a deathly stillness in the house, except at meal-times. It might have been as empty as it had been all the winter, for any sounds of life there were. The old lady sat in her room, alone; the dark-eyed lady wandered off alone, loitering, so Domenico told them, who sometimes came across her in the course of his duties, incomprehensibly among the rocks; the very beautiful fair lady lay in her low chair in the top garden, alone; the less, but still beautiful fair lady went up the hills and stayed up them for hours, alone; and every day the sun blazed slowly round the house, and disappeared at evening into the sea, and nothing at all had happened.

Also, the clear desire of each woman to spend long hours apart from the others confused the servants. The result was a dead silence in the house, except during meal times. It could have felt as empty as it had all winter due to the lack of life noises. The older woman sat alone in her room; the dark-eyed woman wandered off alone, lingering, as Domenico reported when he spotted her during his duties, inexplicably among the rocks; the very beautiful fair woman lay in her low chair in the upper garden, by herself; the less striking, but still beautiful fair woman climbed up the hills and stayed there for hours, alone; and every day the sun slowly moved around the house, disappearing into the sea at evening, and nothing at all had happened.

The servants yawned.

The staff yawned.

Yet the four visitors, while their bodies sat—that was Mrs. Fisher’s—or lay—that was Lady Caroline’s—or loitered—that was Mrs. Arbuthnot’s—or went in solitude up into the hills—that was Mrs. Wilkins’s—were anything but torpid really. Their minds were unusually busy. Even at night their minds were busy, and the dreams they had were clear, thin, quick things, entirely different from the heavy dreams of home. There was that in the atmosphere of San Salvatore which produced active-mindedness in all except the natives. They, as before, whatever the beauty around them, whatever the prodigal seasons did, remained immune from thoughts other than those they were accustomed to. All their lives they had seen, year by year, the amazing recurrent spectacle of April in the gardens, and custom had made it invisible to them. They were as blind to it, as unconscious of it, as Domenico’s dog asleep in the sun.

Yet the four visitors, while their bodies sat—that was Mrs. Fisher’s—or lay—that was Lady Caroline’s—or hung around—that was Mrs. Arbuthnot’s—or wandered alone up into the hills—that was Mrs. Wilkins’s—were anything but sluggish. Their minds were unusually active. Even at night, their minds were busy, and the dreams they had were clear, light, and quick, completely different from the heavy dreams of home. There was something in the air of San Salvatore that sparked active thinking in everyone except the locals. They, as always, no matter the beauty around them or the lavish seasons, remained unaffected by thoughts beyond what they were used to. All their lives, they had witnessed, year after year, the amazing and returning spectacle of April in the gardens, and familiarity had made it invisible to them. They were as blind to it, as unaware of it, as Domenico’s dog sleeping in the sun.

The visitors could not be blind to it—it was too arresting after London in a particularly wet and gloomy March. Suddenly to be transported to that place where the air was so still that it held its breath, where the light was so golden that the most ordinary things were transfigured—to be transported into that delicate warmth, that caressing fragrance, and to have the old grey castle as the setting, and, in the distance, the serene clear hills of Perugini’s backgrounds, was an astonishing contrast. Even Lady Caroline, used all her life to beauty, who had been everywhere and seen everything, felt the surprise of it. It was, that year, a particularly wonderful spring, and of all the months at San Salvatore April, if the weather was fine, was best. May scorched and withered; March was restless, and could be hard and cold in its brightness; but April came along softly like a blessing, and if it were a fine April it was so beautiful that it was impossible not to feel different, not to feel stirred and touched.

The visitors couldn’t ignore it—it was too striking after the wet and gloomy March in London. Suddenly being taken to a place where the air was so still it felt like it was holding its breath, where the light was so golden that even the most ordinary things transformed—being transported into that gentle warmth, that lovely fragrance, with the old grey castle as the backdrop and the serene clear hills of Perugini in the distance was an incredible contrast. Even Lady Caroline, who had spent her life surrounded by beauty and had gone everywhere and seen everything, was surprised by it. That year, spring was particularly wonderful, and of all the months at San Salvatore, April was the best if the weather was nice. May scorched and wilted; March was restless and could be harsh and cold despite its brightness; but April came in softly like a blessing, and when it was a nice April, it was so beautiful that it was impossible not to feel changed, not to feel stirred and moved.

Mrs. Wilkins, we have seen, responded to it instantly. She, so to speak, at once flung off all her garments and dived straight into glory, unhesitatingly, with a cry of rapture.

Mrs. Wilkins, as we've seen, reacted immediately. She basically flung off all her clothes and dove straight into glory without hesitation, crying out in delight.

Mrs. Arbuthnot was stirred and touched, but differently. She had odd sensations—presently to be described.

Mrs. Arbuthnot felt moved and affected, but in a different way. She experienced strange sensations—soon to be described.

Mrs. Fisher, being old, was of a closer, more impermeable texture, and offered more resistance; but she too had odd sensations, also in their place to be described.

Mrs. Fisher, being older, was of a denser, more impenetrable texture, and provided more resistance; but she also experienced strange sensations, which also need to be described.

Lady Caroline, already amply acquainted with beautiful houses and climates, to whom they could not come quite with the same surprise, yet was very nearly as quick to react as Mrs. Wilkins. The place had an almost instantaneous influence on her as well, and of one part of this influence she was aware: it had made her, beginning on the very first evening, want to think, and acted on her curiously like a conscience. What this conscience seemed to press upon her notice with an insistence that startled her—Lady Caroline hesitated to accept the word, but it would keep on coming into her head—was that she was tawdry.

Lady Caroline, who was already quite familiar with beautiful homes and climates, didn’t experience quite the same surprise as Mrs. Wilkins, but she reacted almost just as quickly. The place had an immediate effect on her too, and she recognized one aspect of this influence: it made her want to reflect, and it impacted her like a kind of conscience. This conscience, though she hesitated to call it that, kept nagging at her with a persistence that startled her—what it kept suggesting was that she was cheap.

Tawdry. She. Fancy.

Tacky. She. Stylish.

She must think that out.

She needs to figure that out.

The morning after the first dinner together, she woke up in a condition of regret that she should have been so talkative to Mrs. Wilkins the night before. What had made her be, she wondered. Now, of course, Mrs. Wilkins would want to grab, she would want to be inseparable; and the thought of a grabbing and an inseparableness that should last four weeks made Scrap’s spirit swoon within her. No doubt the encouraged Mrs. Wilkins would be lurking in the top garden waiting to waylay her when she went out, and would hail her with morning cheerfulness. How much she hated being hailed with morning cheerfulness—or indeed, hailed at all. She oughtn’t to have encouraged Mrs. Wilkins the night before. Fatal to encourage. It was bad enough not to encourage, for just sitting there and saying nothing seemed usually to involve her, but actively to encourage was suicidal. What on earth had made her? Now she would have to waste all the precious time, the precious, lovely time for thinking in, for getting square with herself, in shaking Mrs. Wilkins off.

The morning after their first dinner together, she woke up feeling regretful about how chatty she had been with Mrs. Wilkins the night before. What had gotten into her, she wondered. Now, of course, Mrs. Wilkins would want to cling to her; the thought of being stuck together for four weeks made Scrap feel overwhelmed. No doubt the encouraged Mrs. Wilkins would be hanging around the top garden, ready to stop her when she went out, and would greet her with overly cheerful morning vibes. How much she hated being greeted with cheerful enthusiasm—or really, being greeted at all. She shouldn't have encouraged Mrs. Wilkins the night before. It was dangerous to encourage someone. It was hard enough not to encourage, as just sitting there in silence usually drew her in, but actively encouraging was just asking for trouble. What on earth had made her do that? Now she would have to waste all her precious time, that lovely, precious time meant for reflection and getting her thoughts in order, just trying to shake off Mrs. Wilkins.

With great caution and on the tips of her toes, balancing herself carefully lest the pebbles should scrunch, she stole out when she was dressed to her corner; but the garden was empty. No shaking off was necessary. Neither Mrs. Wilkins nor anybody else was to be seen. She had it entirely to herself. Except for Domenico, who presently came and hovered, watering his plants, again especially all the plants that were nearest her, no one came out at all; and when, after a long while of following up thoughts which seemed to escape her just as she had got them, and dropping off exhausted to sleep in the intervals of this chase, she felt hungry and looked at her watch and saw that it was past three, she realised that nobody had even bothered to call her in to lunch. So that, Scrap could not but remark, if any one was shaken off it was she herself.

With great care and on her tiptoes, making sure not to step on any pebbles, she quietly made her way to her corner once she was dressed; but the garden was empty. There was no need to shake anyone off. Neither Mrs. Wilkins nor anyone else was around. It was entirely hers. Except for Domenico, who soon came by to water his plants, especially those closest to her, no one else appeared at all; and after a long time spent chasing thoughts that seemed to slip away just as she caught them, dozing off exhausted in between, she felt hungry and checked her watch to see it was past three. She realized that no one had even bothered to call her in for lunch. So, Scrap couldn’t help but notice that if anyone had been shaken off, it was her.

Well, but how delightful, and how very new. Now she would really be able to think, uninterruptedly. Delicious to be forgotten.

Well, how wonderful and how completely new. Now she could truly think, without any interruptions. It felt amazing to be overlooked.

Still, she was hungry; and Mrs. Wilkins, after that excessive friendliness the night before, might at least have told her lunch was ready. And she had really been excessively friendly—so nice about Mellersh’s sleeping arrangements, wanting him to have the spare-room and all. She wasn’t usually interested in arrangements, in fact she wasn’t ever interested in them; so that Scrap considered she might be said almost to have gone out of her way to be agreeable to Mrs. Wilkins. And, in return, Mrs. Wilkins didn’t even bother whether or not she had any lunch.

Still, she was hungry; and Mrs. Wilkins, after being so overly friendly the night before, could have at least mentioned that lunch was ready. And she had really been excessively friendly—so accommodating about Mellersh’s sleeping arrangements, wanting him to take the spare room and everything. She usually didn’t care about arrangements; in fact, she never cared about them. So, Scrap thought she had almost gone out of her way to be nice to Mrs. Wilkins. And, in return, Mrs. Wilkins didn’t even check if she had any lunch.

Fortunately, though she was hungry, she didn’t mind missing a meal. Life was full of meals. They took up an enormous proportion of one’s time; and Mrs. Fisher was, she was afraid, one of those persons who at meals linger. Twice now had she dined with Mrs. Fisher, and each time she had been difficult at the end to dislodge, lingering on slowly cracking innumerable nuts and slowly drinking a glass of wine that seemed as if it would never be finished. Probably it would be a good thing to make a habit of missing lunch, and as it was quite easy to have tea brought out to her, and as she breakfasted in her room, only once a day would she have to sit at the dining-room table and endure the nuts.

Fortunately, even though she was hungry, she didn’t mind skipping a meal. Life was full of meals. They took up a huge amount of time, and Mrs. Fisher was, she admitted, one of those people who lingered over them. Twice now, she had dined with Mrs. Fisher, and each time it had been difficult to get her to leave, slowly cracking countless nuts and sipping a glass of wine that seemed to take forever to finish. It might be a good idea to make a habit of skipping lunch, and since it was quite easy to have tea brought to her, and since she had breakfast in her room, she would only have to sit at the dining-room table once a day and deal with the nuts.

Scrap burrowed her head comfortably in the cushions, and with her feet crossed on the low parapet gave herself up to more thought. She said to herself, as she had said at intervals throughout the morning: Now I’m going to think. But, never having thought out anything in her life, it was difficult. Extraordinary how one’s attention wouldn’t stay fixed; extraordinary how one’s mind slipped sideways. Settling herself down to a review of her past as a preliminary to the consideration of her future, and hunting in it to begin with for any justification of that distressing word tawdry, the next thing she knew was that she wasn’t thinking about this at all, but had somehow switched on to Mr. Wilkins.

Scrap tucked her head into the cushions and, with her feet crossed on the low ledge, lost herself in thought. She reminded herself, as she had repeatedly throughout the morning: Now I’m going to think. However, since she had never really thought things through in her life, it was challenging. It was strange how hard it was to keep her focus; it was strange how her mind would wander. As she settled down to reflect on her past as a way to consider her future, searching for any reason to justify that troubling word tawdry, the next thing she realized was that she wasn’t thinking about this at all, but had somehow shifted her focus to Mr. Wilkins.

Well, Mr. Wilkins was quite easy to think about, though not pleasant. She viewed his approach with misgivings. For not only was it a profound and unexpected bore to have a man added to the party, and a man, too, of the kind she was sure Mr. Wilkins must be, but she was afraid—and her fear was the result of a drearily unvarying experience—that he might wish to hang about her.

Well, Mr. Wilkins was quite easy to think about, though not pleasant. She looked at his approach with unease. Not only was it a significant and unexpected drag to have a man added to the group, and a man like the kind she imagined Mr. Wilkins must be, but she was also afraid—and her fear came from a monotonous pattern of experience—that he might want to linger around her.

This possibility had evidently not yet occurred to Mrs. Wilkins, and it was not one to which she could very well draw her attention; not, that is, without being too fatuous to live. She tried to hope that Mr. Wilkins would be a wonderful exception to the dreadful rule. If only he were, she would be so much obliged to him that she believed she might really quite like him.

This possibility clearly hadn't occurred to Mrs. Wilkins yet, and it wasn't something she could easily focus on; not without seeming absurd. She tried to believe that Mr. Wilkins would be a fantastic exception to the awful rule. If only he were, she'd feel so grateful to him that she thought she could actually come to like him.

But—she had misgivings. Suppose he hung about her so that she was driven from her lovely top garden; suppose the light in Mrs. Wilkins’s funny, flickering face was blown out. Scrap felt she would particularly dislike this to happen to Mrs. Wilkins’s face, yet she had never in her life met any wives, not any at all, who had been able to understand that she didn’t in the least want their husbands. Often she had met wives who didn’t want their husbands either, but that made them none the less indignant if they thought somebody else did, and none the less sure, when they saw them hanging round Scrap, that she was trying to get them. Trying to get them! The bare thought, the bare recollection of these situations, filled her with a boredom so extreme that it instantly sent her to sleep again.

But she felt uneasy. What if he stuck around her and drove her out of her beautiful top garden? What if the light in Mrs. Wilkins’s quirky, flickering face went out? Scrap really didn’t want that to happen to Mrs. Wilkins’s face, but she had never met any wives who could understand that she had no interest in their husbands at all. She often encountered wives who didn’t want their husbands either, but that didn’t stop them from being indignant if they thought someone else did, and they were always convinced, when they saw them hanging around Scrap, that she was trying to get their husbands. Trying to get them! Just the thought, the mere memory of these situations, bored her so much that it instantly made her fall asleep again.

When she woke up she went on with Mr. Wilkins.

When she woke up, she continued with Mr. Wilkins.

Now if, thought Scrap, Mr. Wilkins were not an exception and behaved in the usual way, would Mrs. Wilkins understand, or would it just simply spoil her holiday? She seemed quick, but would she be quick about just this? She seemed to understand and see inside one, but would she understand and see inside one when it came to Mr. Wilkins?

Now if, Scrap thought, Mr. Wilkins wasn’t different and acted like he usually did, would Mrs. Wilkins get it, or would it just ruin her holiday? She seemed sharp, but would she be sharp about this particular thing? She seemed to understand and see into people, but would she understand and see into Mr. Wilkins when it came to him?

The experienced Scrap was full of doubts. She shifted her feet on the parapet; she jerked a cushion straight. Perhaps she had better try and explain to Mrs. Wilkins, during the days still remaining before the arrival—explain in a general way, rather vague and talking at large—her attitude towards such things. She might also expound to her her peculiar dislike of people’s husbands, and her profound craving to be, at least for this one month, let alone.

The experienced Scrap was filled with uncertainty. She shifted her feet on the edge; she straightened a cushion. Maybe it would be best to try and explain to Mrs. Wilkins, in the days left before the arrival—explain generally, a bit vaguely and broadly—her feelings about such matters. She could also share her unusual dislike of other people’s husbands and her strong desire to be left alone for this one month.

But Scrap had her doubts about this too. Such talk meant a certain familiarity, meant embarking on a friendship with Mrs. Wilkins; and if, after having embarked on it and faced the peril it contained of too much Mrs. Wilkins, Mr. Wilkins should turn out to be artful—and people did get very artful when they were set on anything—and manage after all to slip through into the top garden, Mrs. Wilkins might easily believe she had been taken in, and that she, Scrap, was deceitful. Deceitful! And about Mr. Wilkins. Wives were really pathetic.

But Scrap was skeptical about this too. That kind of talk suggested a level of closeness, meant starting a friendship with Mrs. Wilkins; and if, after starting that friendship, she had to deal with the risk of too much of Mrs. Wilkins, and if Mr. Wilkins turned out to be cunning—and people could get pretty crafty when they wanted something—and somehow manage to sneak into the top garden, Mrs. Wilkins might easily think she had been fooled and assume that Scrap was being dishonest. Dishonest! Especially regarding Mr. Wilkins. Wives could be really sad sometimes.

At half-past four she heard sounds of saucers on the other side of the daphne bushes. Was tea being sent out to her?

At 4:30, she heard the clinking of saucers on the other side of the daphne bushes. Were they serving her some tea?

No; the sounds came no closer, they stopped near the house. Tea was to be in the garden, in her garden. Scrap considered she might at least have been asked if she minded being disturbed. They all knew she sat there.

No; the sounds didn’t come any closer, they just stopped near the house. Tea was supposed to be in the garden, in her garden. Scrap thought she could have at least been asked if she minded being disturbed. They all knew she was sitting there.

Perhaps some one would bring hers to her in her corner.

Perhaps someone would bring hers to her in her corner.

No; nobody brought anything.

Nope; nobody brought anything.

Well, she was too hungry not to go and have it with the others to-day, but she would give Francesca strict orders for the future.

Well, she was too hungry not to join the others today, but she would give Francesca clear instructions for the future.

She got up, and walked with that slow grace which was another of her outrageous number of attractions towards the sounds of tea. She was conscious not only of being very hungry but of wanting to talk to Mrs. Wilkins again. Mrs. Wilkins had not grabbed, she had left her quite free all day in spite of the rapprochement the night before. Of course she was an original, and put on a silk jumper for dinner, but she hadn’t grabbed. This was a great thing. Scrap went towards the tea-table quite looking forward to Mrs. Wilkins; and when she came in sight of it she saw only Mrs. Fisher and Mrs. Arbuthnot.

She got up and walked with that slow grace, one of her many alluring qualities, toward the sounds of tea. She was aware not only of being very hungry but also of wanting to talk to Mrs. Wilkins again. Mrs. Wilkins hadn’t pounced; she had given her space all day despite their connection the night before. Of course, she was unique and wore a silk jumper for dinner, but she hadn’t pounced. This was a big deal. Scrap headed to the tea table, eagerly anticipating Mrs. Wilkins; however, when she reached it, she only saw Mrs. Fisher and Mrs. Arbuthnot.

Mrs. Fisher was pouring out the tea, and Mrs. Arbuthnot was offering Mrs. Fisher macaroons. Every time Mrs. Fisher offered Mrs. Arbuthnot anything—her cup, or milk, or sugar—Mrs. Arbuthnot offered her macaroons—pressed them on her with an odd assiduousness, almost with obstinacy. Was it a game? Scrap wondered, sitting down and seizing a macaroon.

Mrs. Fisher was pouring the tea, and Mrs. Arbuthnot was offering her macaroons. Every time Mrs. Fisher offered Mrs. Arbuthnot something—like her cup, or milk, or sugar—Mrs. Arbuthnot insisted on giving her macaroons, almost pushing them on her stubbornly. Was it a game? Scrap wondered, sitting down and grabbing a macaroon.

“Where is Mrs. Wilkins?” asked Scrap.

“Where’s Mrs. Wilkins?” Scrap asked.

They did not know. At least, Mrs. Arbuthnot, on Scrap’s inquiry, did not know; Mrs. Fisher’s face, at the name, became elaborately uninterested.

They had no idea. At least, Mrs. Arbuthnot, when Scrap asked, didn’t have a clue; Mrs. Fisher’s expression, upon hearing the name, turned deliberately disinterested.

It appeared that Mrs. Wilkins had not been seen since breakfast. Mrs. Arbuthnot thought she had probably gone for a picnic. Scrap missed her. She ate the enormous macaroons, the best and biggest she had ever come across, in silence. Tea without Mrs. Wilkins was dull; and Mrs. Arbuthnot had that fatal flavour of motherliness about her, of wanting to pet one, to make one very comfortable, coaxing one to eat—coaxing her, who was already so frankly, so even excessively, eating—that seemed to have dogged Scrap’s steps through life. Couldn’t people leave one alone? She was perfectly able to eat what she wanted unincited. She tried to quench Mrs. Arbuthnot’s zeal by being short with her. Useless. The shortness was not apparent. It remained, as all Scrap’s evil feelings remained, covered up by the impenetrable veil of her loveliness.

It seemed that Mrs. Wilkins hadn’t been seen since breakfast. Mrs. Arbuthnot thought she had probably gone for a picnic. Scrap missed her. She quietly ate the huge macaroons, the best and biggest she had ever tasted. Tea without Mrs. Wilkins was boring; and Mrs. Arbuthnot had that annoying motherly vibe, wanting to fuss over her, to make her comfortable, coaxing her to eat—coaxing her, who was already so openly, even excessively, eating—that seemed to have followed Scrap throughout her life. Couldn’t people just leave her alone? She was perfectly capable of eating what she wanted without being pushed. She tried to discourage Mrs. Arbuthnot’s eagerness by being curt with her. Useless. The curtness didn’t come across. It stayed, just like all of Scrap’s negative feelings stayed, hidden behind the impenetrable shield of her beauty.

Mrs. Fisher sat monumentally, and took no notice of either of them. She had had a curious day, and was a little worried. She had been quite alone, for none of the three had come to lunch, and none of them had taken the trouble to let her know they were not coming; and Mrs. Arbuthnot, drifting casually into tea, had behaved oddly till Lady Caroline joined them and distracted her attention.

Mrs. Fisher sat there like a statue, ignoring both of them. She had a strange day and felt a bit anxious. She had been all alone since none of the three had shown up for lunch, and none of them bothered to inform her they wouldn't be coming; when Mrs. Arbuthnot casually came in for tea, she acted strangely until Lady Caroline joined them and shifted her focus.

Mrs. Fisher was prepared not to dislike Mrs. Arbuthnot, whose parted hair and mild expression seemed very decent and womanly, but she certainly had habits that were difficult to like. Her habit of instantly echoing any offer made her of food or drink, of throwing the offer back on one, as it were, was not somehow what one expected of her. “Will you have some more tea?” was surely a question to which the answer was simply yes or no; but Mrs. Arbuthnot persisted in the trick she had exhibited the day before at breakfast, of adding to her yes or no the words, “Will you?” She had done it again that morning at breakfast and here she was doing it at tea—the two meals at which Mrs. Fisher presided and poured out. Why did she do it? Mrs. Fisher failed to understand.

Mrs. Fisher was ready not to dislike Mrs. Arbuthnot, whose neatly parted hair and gentle expression seemed quite decent and feminine, but she definitely had some habits that were hard to appreciate. Her tendency to immediately repeat any offer of food or drink back to the person making it, as if to throw the question back at them, was not what one expected from her. “Would you like some more tea?” was clearly a question with a straightforward yes or no answer; yet, Mrs. Arbuthnot continued the trick she had shown the previous day at breakfast, adding to her yes or no the words, “Will you?” She did it again that morning at breakfast and here she was doing it at tea—the two meals at which Mrs. Fisher was in charge of serving. Why did she do that? Mrs. Fisher couldn't figure it out.

But this was not what was worrying her; this was merely by the way. What was worrying her was that she had been quite unable that day to settle to anything, and had done nothing but wander restlessly from her sitting-room to her battlements and back again. It had been a wasted day, and how much she disliked waste. She had tried to read, and she had tried to write to Kate Lumley; but no—a few words read, a few lines written, and up she got again and went out on to the battlements and stared at the sea.

But that wasn’t what was bothering her; that was just a side note. What really worried her was that she had been completely unable to focus that day and had spent all her time wandering aimlessly from her living room to her battlements and back. It felt like a wasted day, and she hated wasting time. She had tried to read and attempted to write to Kate Lumley, but no—she read a few words, wrote a few lines, and then got up again to go out to the battlements and stare at the sea.

It did not matter that the letter to Kate Lumley should not be written. There was time enough for that. Let the others suppose her coming was definitely fixed. All the better. So would Mr. Wilkins be kept out of the spare-room and put where he belonged. Kate would keep. She could be held in reserve. Kate in reserve was just as potent as Kate in actuality, and there were points about Kate in reserve which might be missing from Kate in actuality. For instance, if Mrs. Fisher were going to be restless, she would rather Kate were not there to see. There was a want of dignity about restlessness, about trotting backwards and forwards. But it did matter that she could not read a sentence of any of her great dead friends’ writings; no, not even of Browning’s, who had been so much in Italy, nor of Ruskin’s, whose Stones of Venice she had brought with her to re-read so nearly on the very spot; nor even a sentence of a really interesting book like the one she had found in her sitting-room about the home life of the German Emperor, poor man—written in the nineties, when he had not yet begun to be more sinned against than sinning, which was, she was firmly convinced, what was the matter with him now, and full of exciting things about his birth and his right arm and accoucheurs—without having to put it down and go and stare at the sea.

It didn't matter that the letter to Kate Lumley shouldn't be written. There was plenty of time for that. Let everyone think her arrival was definitely set. That was even better. It would keep Mr. Wilkins out of the spare room and put him where he belonged. Kate could wait. She could be held in reserve. Kate in reserve was just as powerful as Kate in person, and there were aspects of Kate in reserve that might not be present with Kate around. For example, if Mrs. Fisher was going to be restless, she'd prefer Kate not to witness it. There was a lack of dignity in restlessness, in pacing back and forth. But it did matter that she couldn't read a single sentence of any of her beloved deceased friends’ writings; not even Browning’s, who had spent so much time in Italy, or Ruskin’s, whose Stones of Venice she had brought with her to re-read practically on the very spot; not even a sentence from a genuinely interesting book she found in her sitting room about the home life of the German Emperor, poor guy—written in the nineties when he hadn’t yet started being more wronged than wrongdoer, which she was sure was what troubled him now, full of fascinating details about his birth and his right arm and accoucheurs—without having to set it down and go stare at the sea.

Reading was very important; the proper exercise and development of one’s mind was a paramount duty. How could one read if one were constantly trotting in and out? Curious, this restlessness. Was she going to be ill? No, she felt well; indeed, unusually well, and she went in and out quite quickly—trotted, in fact—and without her stick. Very odd that she shouldn’t be able to sit still, she thought, frowning across the tops of some purple hyacinths at the Gulf of Spezia glittering beyond a headland; very odd that she, who walked so slowly, with such dependence on her stick, should suddenly trot.

Reading was really important; properly exercising and developing one’s mind was a top priority. How could anyone read if they were always running in and out? It was strange, this restlessness. Was she going to get sick? No, she felt fine; in fact, she felt unusually good, and she went in and out pretty quickly—almost trotting—and without her stick. It was very strange that she couldn’t sit still, she thought, frowning over some purple hyacinths at the sparkling Gulf of Spezia beyond a headland; very strange that she, who usually walked so slowly and relied so much on her stick, could suddenly trot.

It would be interesting to talk to some one about it, she felt. Not to Kate—to a stranger. Kate would only look at her and suggest a cup of tea. Kate always suggested cups of tea. Besides, Kate had a flat face. That Mrs. Wilkins, now—annoying as she was, loose-tongued as she was, impertinent, objectionable, would probably understand, and perhaps know what was making her be like this. But she could say nothing to Mrs. Wilkins. She was the last person to whom one would admit sensations. Dignity alone forbade it. Confide in Mrs. Wilkins? Never.

She thought it would be interesting to talk to someone about it, but not to Kate—she wanted a stranger. Kate would just look at her and suggest having a cup of tea. Kate always suggested tea. Plus, Kate had a flat face. That Mrs. Wilkins, though—annoying as she was, talking too much, rude and disagreeable—might actually understand and maybe even know why she felt this way. But she couldn’t say anything to Mrs. Wilkins. She was the last person anyone would share their feelings with. Dignity alone prevented it. Confide in Mrs. Wilkins? Never.

And Mrs. Arbuthnot, while she wistfully mothered the obstructive Scrap at tea, felt too that she had had a curious day. Like Mrs. Fisher’s, it had been active, but, unlike Mrs. Fisher’s, only active in mind. Her body had been quite still; her mind had not been still at all, it had been excessively active. For years she had taken care to have no time to think. Her scheduled life in the parish had prevented memories and desires from intruding on her. That day they had crowded. She went back to tea feeling dejected, and that she should feel dejected in such a place with everything about her to make her rejoice, only dejected her the more. But how could she rejoice alone? How could anybody rejoice and enjoy and appreciate, really appreciate, alone? Except Lotty. Lotty seemed able to. She had gone off down the hill directly after breakfast, alone yet obviously rejoicing, for she had not suggested that Rose should go too, and she was singing as she went.

And Mrs. Arbuthnot, while she wistfully cared for the difficult Scrap at tea, felt that she had experienced a strange day. Like Mrs. Fisher’s, it had been active, but unlike Mrs. Fisher’s, it had been lively only in her mind. Her body had been completely still; her mind, on the other hand, had been anything but still—it had been overwhelmingly busy. For years, she had made sure to keep herself too occupied to think. Her structured life in the parish had kept memories and desires from breaking in. That day, they had flooded in. She returned to tea feeling down, and the fact that she felt this way in such a beautiful place, where everything should have made her happy, only made her feel worse. But how could she feel happy alone? How could anyone truly rejoice and enjoy life while being by themselves? Except Lotty. Lotty seemed to be able to. She had headed down the hill right after breakfast, alone yet clearly feeling joyful, since she hadn’t suggested that Rose come along, and she was singing as she walked.

Rose had spent the day by herself, sitting with her hands clasping her knees, staring straight in front of her. What she was staring at were the grey swords of the agaves, and, on their tall stalks, the pale irises that grew in the remote place she had found, while beyond them, between the grey leaves and the blue flowers, she saw the sea. The place she had found was a hidden corner where the sun-baked stones were padded with thyme, and nobody was likely to come. It was out of sight and sound of the house; it was off any path; it was near the end of the promontory. She sat so quiet that presently lizards darted over her feet, and some tiny birds like finches, frightened away at first, came back again and flitted among the bushes round her just as if she hadn’t been there. How beautiful it was. And what was the good of it with no one there, no one who loved being with one, who belonged to one, to whom one could say, “Look.” And wouldn’t one say, “Look—dearest?” Yes, one would say dearest and the sweet word, just to say it to somebody who loved one, would make one happy.

Rose had spent the day alone, sitting with her hands clasped around her knees, staring straight ahead. What she was looking at were the gray blades of the agaves, and on their tall stalks, the pale irises that grew in the secluded spot she had discovered. Beyond them, between the gray leaves and the blue flowers, she could see the sea. The place she had found was a hidden nook where the sun-baked stones were covered with thyme, and it was unlikely anyone would come by. It was out of sight and sound of the house; it was off any path; it was near the tip of the promontory. She sat so still that eventually lizards darted over her feet, and some tiny birds like finches, initially scared away, returned and flitted among the bushes around her as if she hadn’t been there. How beautiful it was. But what was the point of it all without anyone there, no one who loved being with her, who belonged to her, to whom she could say, “Look." And wouldn’t she say, “Look—dearest?” Yes, she would say dearest, and just saying that sweet word to someone who loved her would make her happy.

She sat quite still, staring straight in front of her. Strange that in this place she did not want to pray. She who had prayed so constantly at home didn’t seem able to do it here at all. The first morning she had merely thrown up a brief thank you to heaven on getting out of bed, and had gone straight to the window to see what everything looked like—thrown up the thank you as carelessly as a ball, and thought no more about it. That morning, remembering this and ashamed, she had knelt down with determination; but perhaps determination was bad for prayers, for she had been unable to think of a thing to say. And as for her bedtime prayers, on neither of the nights had she said a single one. She had forgotten them. She had been so much absorbed in other thoughts that she had forgotten them; and, once in bed, she was asleep and whirling along among bright, thin swift dreams before she had so much time as to stretch herself out.

She sat completely still, staring straight ahead. It was strange that in this place she didn’t feel like praying. She, who had prayed so often at home, couldn’t seem to do it here at all. On the first morning, she had just tossed off a quick thank you to the heavens after getting out of bed and then went straight to the window to see what everything looked like—she had thrown up the thank you carelessly like a ball and didn’t think about it again. That morning, feeling ashamed and remembering this, she knelt down with determination; but maybe determination wasn’t good for prayers because she couldn’t think of anything to say. And as for her bedtime prayers, she hadn’t said a single one on either of the nights. She had forgotten them. She had been so wrapped up in other thoughts that she had forgotten them, and once in bed, she fell asleep and was swept away into bright, thin, swift dreams before she even had time to stretch out.

What had come over her? Why had she let go the anchor of prayer? And she had difficulty, too, in remembering her poor, in remembering even that there were such things as poor. Holidays, of course, were good, and were recognised by everybody as good, but ought they so completely to blot out, to make such havoc of, the realities? Perhaps it was healthy to forget her poor; with all the greater gusto would she go back to them. But it couldn’t be healthy to forget her prayers, and still less could it be healthy not to mind.

What had happened to her? Why had she abandoned her prayers? She was also struggling to remember the poor, even acknowledging that they existed. Holidays, of course, were good and everyone recognized them as such, but should they completely erase or disrupt the harsh realities? Maybe it was beneficial to forget about the poor for a while; she would return to them with even more enthusiasm. But it couldn't be good to forget her prayers, and it was definitely not healthy to be indifferent.

Rose did not mind. She knew she did not mind. And, even worse, she knew she did not mind not minding. In this place she was indifferent to both the things that had filled her life and made it seem as if it were happy for years. Well, if only she could rejoice in her wonderful new surroundings, have that much at least to set against the indifference, the letting go—but she could not. She had no work; she did not pray; she was left empty.

Rose didn't care. She was aware that she didn't care. And, even worse, she knew she didn't care about not caring. In this place, she was indifferent to both the things that had filled her life and made it seem happy for years. Well, if only she could find joy in her amazing new surroundings, that would at least be something to counter the indifference, the letting go—but she couldn't. She had no job; she didn't pray; she felt empty.

Lotty had spoilt her day that day, as she had spoilt her day the day before—Lotty, with her invitation to her husband, with her suggestion that she too should invite hers. Having flung Frederick into her mind again the day before, Lotty had left her; for the whole afternoon she had left her alone with her thoughts. Since then they had been all of Frederick. Where at Hampstead he came to her only in her dreams, here he left her dreams free and was with her during the day instead. And again that morning, as she was struggling not to think of him, Lotty had asked her, just before disappearing singing down the path, if she had written yet and invited him, and again he was flung into her mind and she wasn’t able to get him out.

Lotty had ruined her day that day, just like she had ruined her day the day before—Lotty, with her invitation to her husband, and her suggestion that she should invite hers too. After bringing Frederick back into her thoughts the day before, Lotty had abandoned her; for the entire afternoon, she was left alone with her thoughts. Since then, they had all been about Frederick. Where at Hampstead he came to her only in her dreams, here he invaded her waking hours instead. And again that morning, as she was trying not to think about him, Lotty had asked her, just before disappearing while singing down the path, if she had written to invite him yet, and once more he was thrown into her mind, and she couldn't shake him off.

How could she invite him? It had gone on so long, their estrangement, such years; she would hardly know what words to use; and besides, he would not come. Why should he come? He didn’t care about being with her. What could they talk about? Between them was the barrier of his work and her religion. She could not—how could she, believing as she did in purity, in responsibility for the effect of one’s actions on others—bear his work, bear living by it; and he, she knew, had at first resented and then been merely bored by her religion. He had let her slip away; he had given her up; he no longer minded; he accepted her religion indifferently, as a settled fact. Both it and she—Rose’s mind, becoming more luminous in the clear light of April at San Salvatore, suddenly saw the truth—bored him.

How could she invite him? Their estrangement had lasted so long, for years; she would hardly know what to say; and anyway, he wouldn’t come. Why would he? He didn’t care about being with her. What would they even talk about? There was a barrier between them created by his work and her religion. She couldn’t—how could she, believing as she did in purity and the responsibility for how one’s actions affect others—stand his work, stand living by it; and he, she knew, had initially resented her religion and then grown just bored by it. He had let her drift away; he had given up on her; he no longer cared; he accepted her religion with indifference, as if it were just a fact of life. Both it and she—Rose’s thoughts, becoming clearer in the bright light of April at San Salvatore, suddenly recognized the truth—bored him.

Naturally when she saw this, when that morning it flashed upon her for the first time, she did not like it; she liked it so little that for a space the whole beauty of Italy was blotted out. What was to be done about it? She could not give up believing in good and not liking evil, and it must be evil to live entirely on the proceeds of adulteries, however dead and distinguished they were. Besides, if she did, if she sacrificed her whole past, her bringing up, her work for the last ten years, would she bore him less? Rose felt right down at her very roots that if you have once thoroughly bored somebody it is next to impossible to unbore him. Once a bore always a bore—certainly, she thought, to the person originally bored.

Naturally, when she saw this that morning for the first time, she didn’t like it; she disliked it so much that, for a moment, the entire beauty of Italy was erased. What could she do about it? She couldn’t stop believing in good and hating evil, and it had to be evil to live entirely off the profits of affairs, no matter how old and distinguished they were. Besides, if she did that, if she sacrificed her entire past, her upbringing, her work over the last ten years, would it make him less bored? Rose felt deep down that once you’ve truly bored someone, it's almost impossible to make them unbored. Once a bore, always a bore—certainly, she thought, for the person who was originally bored.

Then, thought she, looking out to sea through eyes grown misty, better cling to her religion. It was better—she hardly noticed the reprehensibleness of her thought—than nothing. But oh, she wanted to cling to something tangible, to love something living, something that one could hold against one’s heart, that one could see and touch and do things for. If her poor baby hadn’t died . . . babies didn’t get bored with one, it took them a long while to grow up and find one out. And perhaps one’s baby never did find one out; perhaps one would always be to it, however old and bearded it grew, somebody special, somebody different from every one else, and if for no other reason, precious in that one could never be repeated.

Then she thought, looking out at the sea with misty eyes, that it was better to hold on to her faith. It was better—she barely recognized how wrong that thought was—than nothing. But oh, she longed to hold onto something real, to love something alive, something she could keep close to her heart, something she could see and touch and do things for. If her poor baby hadn’t died… babies didn’t get bored with you; it took them a long time to grow up and figure you out. And maybe your baby would never figure you out; maybe you would always be to them, no matter how old and grizzly you became, someone special, someone different from everyone else, and for no other reason, precious because that bond could never be replicated.

Sitting with dim eyes looking out to sea she felt an extraordinary yearning to hold something of her very own tight to her bosom. Rose was slender, and as reserved in figure as in character, yet she felt a queer sensation of—how could she describe it?—bosom. There was something about San Salvatore that made her feel all bosom. She wanted to gather to her bosom, to comfort and protect, soothing the dear head that should lie on it with softest strokings and murmurs of love. Frederick, Frederick’s child—come to her, pillowed on her, because they were unhappy, because they had been hurt. . . They would need her then, if they had been hurt; they would let themselves be loved then, if they were unhappy.

Sitting with dim eyes gazing out at the sea, she felt a strong desire to hold something of her own close to her chest. Rose was slender, and just as reserved in body as she was in personality, yet she felt a strange sensation of—how could she put it?—yearning. There was something about San Salvatore that made her feel deeply connected. She wanted to gather them close, to comfort and protect, soothing the dear head that should rest on her with gentle touches and whispers of love. Frederick, Frederick’s child—come to her, resting on her, because they were unhappy, because they had been hurt. . . They would need her then, if they had been hurt; they would allow themselves to be loved then, if they were unhappy.

Well, the child was gone, would never come now; but perhaps Frederick—some day—when he was old and tired . . .

Well, the child was gone and would never come back now; but maybe Frederick—someday—when he was old and tired . . .

Such were Mrs. Arbuthnot’s reflections and emotions that first day at San Salvatore by herself. She went back to tea dejected as she had not been for years. San Salvatore had taken her carefully built-up semblance of happiness away from her, and given her nothing in exchange. Yes—it had given her yearnings in exchange, this ache and longing, this queer feeling of bosom; but that was worse than nothing. And she who had learned balance, who never at home was irritated but always able to be kind, could not, even in her dejection, that afternoon endure Mrs. Fisher’s assumption of the position as hostess at tea.

Mrs. Arbuthnot's thoughts and feelings on that first day alone at San Salvatore were heavy. She returned to tea feeling more downcast than she had in years. San Salvatore had stripped away her carefully crafted sense of happiness, leaving her with nothing in return. Yes—it had given her a sense of yearning instead, this ache and longing, this strange feeling in her chest; but that was even worse than having nothing. And she, who had learned to maintain her composure and was always kind at home, couldn’t even tolerate Mrs. Fisher's take on being the hostess at tea, despite her own sadness that afternoon.

One would have supposed that such a little thing would not have touched her, but it did. Was her nature changing? Was she to be not only thrown back on long-stifled yearnings after Frederick, but also turned into somebody who wanted to fight over little things? After tea, when both Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline had disappeared again—it was quite evident that nobody wanted her—she was more dejected than ever, overwhelmed by the discrepancy between the splendour outside her, the warm, teeming beauty and self-sufficiency of nature, and the blank emptiness of her heart.

One would think that such a small thing wouldn’t affect her, but it did. Was she changing? Was she not only being forced to confront long-buried feelings for Frederick, but also becoming someone who wanted to argue about trivial matters? After tea, when both Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline had vanished again—it was clear that nobody wanted her—she felt more down than ever, overwhelmed by the contrast between the beauty and abundance of nature around her and the emptiness in her heart.

Then came Lotty, back to dinner, incredibly more freckled, exuding the sunshine she had been collecting all day, talking, laughing, being tactless, being unwise, being without reticence; and Lady Caroline, so quiet at tea, woke up to animation, and Mrs. Fisher was not so noticeable, and Rose was beginning to revive a little, for Lotty’s spirits were contagious as she described the delights of her day, a day which might easily to any one else have had nothing in it but a very long and very hot walk and sandwiches, when she suddenly said catching Rose’s eye, “Letter gone?”

Then Lotty came back to dinner, even more freckled, radiating the sunshine she’d collected all day, chatting, laughing, being a bit insensitive, being impulsive, and being completely open; and Lady Caroline, who had been so quiet at tea, suddenly came to life, while Mrs. Fisher faded into the background, and Rose started to perk up a little, because Lotty's cheerful energy was infectious as she talked about the joys of her day—a day that to anyone else might have seemed nothing more than a long, hot walk and some sandwiches—when she suddenly said, catching Rose’s eye, “Letter gone?”

Rose flushed. This tactlessness . . .

Rose felt embarrassed. This insensitivity...

“What letter?” asked Scrap, interested. Both her elbows were on the table and her chin was supported in her hands, for the nut-stage had been reached, and there was nothing for it but to wait in as comfortable as position as possible till Mrs. Fisher had finished cracking.

“What letter?” Scrap asked, intrigued. Both her elbows were on the table, and she rested her chin in her hands because she had reached the nut-stage, and there was nothing to do but wait in as comfortable a position as possible until Mrs. Fisher finished cracking.

“Asking her husband here,” said Lotty.

“Asking her husband here,” said Lotty.

Mrs. Fisher looked up. Another husband? Was there to be no end to them? Nor was this one, then, a widow either; but her husband was no doubt a decent, respectable man, following a decent, respectable calling. She had little hope of Mr. Wilkins; so little, that she had refrained from inquiring what he did.

Mrs. Fisher looked up. Another husband? Would there be no end to them? And this one wasn’t a widow either; but her husband was probably a decent, respectable guy with a decent, respectable job. She had very little hope for Mr. Wilkins; so little that she hadn’t even bothered to ask what he did.

“Has it?” persisted Lotty, as Rose said nothing.

“Has it?” Lotty kept asking, since Rose didn’t say anything.

“No,” said Rose.

"No," Rose said.

“Oh, well—to-morrow then,” said Lotty.

“Oh, well—tomorrow then,” said Lotty.

Rose wanted to say No again to this. Lotty would have in her place, and would, besides, have expounded all her reasons. But she could not turn herself inside out like that and invite any and everybody to come and look. How was it that Lotty, who saw so many things, didn’t see stuck on her heart, and seeing keep quiet about it, the sore place that was Frederick?

Rose wanted to say No again to this. Lotty would have done it for her, and would have explained all her reasons too. But she couldn’t expose herself like that and invite just anyone to come and look. How was it that Lotty, who noticed so many things, didn’t see the ache in her heart, and kept quiet about it, the painful spot that was Frederick?

“Who is your husband?” asked Mrs. Fisher, carefully adjusting another nut between the crackers.

“Who is your husband?” asked Mrs. Fisher, carefully adjusting another nut between the crackers.

“Who should he be,” said Rose quickly, roused at once by Mrs. Fisher to irritation, “except Mr. Arbuthnot?”

“Who else could it be,” Rose said quickly, immediately irritated by Mrs. Fisher, “except Mr. Arbuthnot?”

“I mean, of course, what is Mr. Arbuthnot?”

“I mean, of course, what is Mr. Arbuthnot?”

And Rose, gone painfully red at this, said after a tiny pause, “My husband.”

And Rose, blushing deeply at this, said after a brief pause, “My husband.”

Naturally, Mrs. Fisher was incensed. She couldn’t have believed it of this one, with her decent hair and gentle voice, that she too should be impertinent.

Naturally, Mrs. Fisher was furious. She couldn’t believe it of this one, with her nice hair and soft voice, that she would also be rude.

Chapter 14

That first week the wistaria began to fade, and the flowers of the Judas-tree and peach-trees fell off and carpeted the ground with rose-colour. Then all the freesias disappeared, and the irises grew scarce. And then, while these were clearing themselves away, the double banksia roses came out, and the big summer roses suddenly flaunted gorgeously on the walls and trellises. Fortune’s Yellow was one of them; a very beautiful rose. Presently the tamarisk and the daphnes were at their best, and the lilies at their tallest. By the end of the week the fig-trees were giving shade, the plum-blossom was out among the olives, the modest weigelias appeared in their fresh pink clothes, and on the rocks sprawled masses of thick-leaved, star-shaped flowers, some vivid purple and some a clear, pale lemon.

That first week, the wisteria started to fade, and the flowers from the Judas tree and peach trees dropped, covering the ground with shades of pink. Then all the freesias vanished, and the irises became rare. While those were clearing away, the double banksia roses bloomed, and the large summer roses suddenly burst into color on the walls and trellises. Fortune's Yellow was one of them, an incredibly beautiful rose. Soon, the tamarisk and the daphnes were at their peak, and the lilies stood tall. By the end of the week, the fig trees were providing shade, the plum blossoms appeared among the olives, the modest weigelias showed off in their fresh pink attire, and on the rocks sprawled clusters of thick-leaved, star-shaped flowers, some a vivid purple and others a soft, pale yellow.

By the end of the week, too, Mr. Wilkins arrived; even as his wife had foreseen he would, so he did. And there were signs almost of eagerness about his acceptance of her suggestion, for he had not waited to write a letter in answer to hers, but had telegraphed.

By the end of the week, Mr. Wilkins arrived, just as his wife had predicted he would. He seemed almost eager to accept her suggestion, since he didn't bother writing a letter in response to hers and instead sent a telegram.

That, surely, was eager. It showed, Scrap thought, a definite wish for reunion; and watching his wife’s happy face, and aware of her desire that Mellersh should enjoy his holiday, she told herself that he would be a very unusual fool should he waste his time bothering about anybody else. “If he isn’t nice to her,” Scrap thought, “he shall be taken to the battlements and tipped over.” For, by the end of the week, she and Mrs. Wilkins had become Caroline and Lotty to each other, and were friends.

That, for sure, was enthusiastic. It showed, Scrap thought, a clear desire to reunite; and seeing her wife’s happy face, while knowing she wanted Mellersh to enjoy his vacation, Scrap told herself he would be a total fool to waste his time worrying about anyone else. “If he isn’t nice to her,” Scrap thought, “he’ll be taken to the edge and pushed off.” By the end of the week, she and Mrs. Wilkins had turned into Caroline and Lotty for each other, and they were friends.

Mrs. Wilkins had always been friends, but Scrap had struggled not to be. She had tried hard to be cautious, but how difficult was caution with Mrs. Wilkins! Free herself from every vestige of it, she was so entirely unreserved, so completely expansive, that soon Scrap, almost before she knew what she was doing, was being unreserved too. And nobody could be more unreserved than Scrap, once she let herself go.

Mrs. Wilkins had always been friendly, but Scrap had a hard time not being guarded. She had tried really hard to be cautious, but how could you be cautious with Mrs. Wilkins? Freeing herself from any trace of it, Mrs. Wilkins was so open and so totally expressive that soon Scrap, almost without realizing it, was being open too. And no one could be more open than Scrap once she let herself relax.

The only difficulty about Lotty was that she was nearly always somewhere else. You couldn’t catch her; you couldn’t pin her down to come and talk. Scrap’s fears that she would grab seemed grotesque in retrospect. Why, there was no grab in her. At dinner and after dinner were the only times one really saw her. All day long she was invisible, and would come back in the late afternoon looking a perfect sight, her hair full of bits of moss, and her freckles worse than ever. Perhaps she was making the most of her time before Mellersh arrived to do all the things she wanted to do, and meant to devote herself afterwards to going about with him, tidy and in her best clothes.

The only issue with Lotty was that she was almost always elsewhere. You couldn’t catch her; you couldn’t get her to sit down and talk. Scrap’s fears that she would grab seemed ridiculous in hindsight. After all, there was no grabbing about her. Dinner and after dinner were the only times you really saw her. All day long she was out of sight, and she’d come back in the late afternoon looking a mess, her hair full of bits of moss, and her freckles more prominent than ever. Maybe she was making the most of her time before Mellersh showed up to do everything she wanted to do, and she planned to devote herself to spending time with him afterward, looking neat and dressed up in her best clothes.

Scrap watched her, interested in spite of herself, because it seemed so extraordinary to be as happy as all that on so little. San Salvatore was beautiful, and the weather was divine; but scenery and weather had never been enough for Scrap, and how could they be enough for somebody who would have to leave them quite soon and go back to life in Hampstead? Also, there was the imminence of Mellersh, of that Mellersh from whom Lotty had so lately run. It was all very well to feel one ought to share, and to make a beau geste and do it, but the beaux gestes Scrap had known hadn’t made anybody happy. Nobody really liked being the object of one, and it always meant an effort on the part of the maker. Still, she had to admit there was no effort about Lotty; it was quite plain that everything she did and said was effortless, and that she was just simply, completely happy.

Scrap watched her, intrigued despite herself, because it seemed so unusual to be that happy with so little. San Salvatore was stunning, and the weather was perfect; but scenery and weather had never been enough for Scrap, and how could they be enough for someone who would have to leave them pretty soon and return to life in Hampstead? Also, there was the looming presence of Mellersh, the same Mellersh from whom Lotty had recently escaped. It was easy to feel like you should share and make a grand gesture to do so, but the grand gestures Scrap had seen hadn’t made anyone truly happy. Nobody actually liked being the center of one, and it always required effort from the person making it. Still, she had to admit that there was no effort in Lotty; it was clear that everything she did and said came naturally, and that she was just truly, completely happy.

And so Mrs. Wilkins was; for her doubts as to whether she had had time to become steady enough in serenity to go on being serene in Mellersh’s company when she had it uninterruptedly right round the clock, had gone by the middle of the week, and she felt that nothing now could shake her. She was ready for anything. She was firmly grafted, rooted, built into heaven. Whatever Mellersh said or did, she would not budge an inch out of heaven, would not rouse herself a single instant to come outside it and be cross. On the contrary, she was going to pull him up into it beside her, and they would sit comfortably together, suffused in light, and laugh at how much afraid of him she used to be in Hampstead, and at how deceitful her afraidness had made her. But he wouldn’t need much pulling. He would come in quite naturally after a day or two, irresistibly wafted on the scented breezes of that divine air; and there he would sit arrayed in stars, thought Mrs. Wilkins, in whose mind, among much other débris, floated occasional bright shreds of poetry. She laughed to herself a little at the picture of Mellersh, that top-hatted, black-coated, respectable family solicitor, arrayed in stars, but she laughed affectionately, almost with a maternal pride in how splendid he would look in such fine clothes. “Poor lamb,” she murmured to herself affectionately. And added, “What he wants is a thorough airing.”

And so Mrs. Wilkins was; by the middle of the week, her doubts about whether she could maintain her calm and serenity around Mellersh, even when she had it non-stop, had disappeared. She felt like nothing could shake her now. She was ready for anything. She was firmly rooted and grounded in a state of bliss. No matter what Mellersh said or did, she wouldn’t budge an inch from her happy place or let herself get upset, not even for a moment. On the contrary, she was planning to draw him up into it with her, and they would sit comfortably together, basking in the light, and laugh about how scared she used to be of him in Hampstead, and how that fear had made her act deceitfully. But he wouldn’t need much convincing. After a day or two, he would naturally join her, irresistibly drawn in by the sweet breeze of that heavenly atmosphere; and there he would sit surrounded by stars, thought Mrs. Wilkins, whose mind, among many other thoughts, held occasional flashes of poetry. She chuckled a bit at the image of Mellersh, that dapper, respectable family lawyer, covered in stars, but it was a warm laugh, almost with a motherly pride in how amazing he would look in such elegant attire. “Poor thing,” she murmured to herself affectionately. And added, “What he needs is a good break.”

This was during the first half of the week. By the beginning of the last half, at the end of which Mr. Wilkins arrived, she left off even assuring herself that she was unshakeable, that she was permeated beyond altering by the atmosphere, she no longer thought of it or noticed it; she took it for granted. If one may say so, and she certainly said so, not only to herself but also to Lady Caroline, she had found her celestial legs.

This was during the first half of the week. By the start of the second half, when Mr. Wilkins arrived, she stopped even convincing herself that she was unshakeable, that she was completely unaffected by the atmosphere; she no longer thought about it or noticed it; she accepted it as a given. If one can say that, and she definitely did—both to herself and to Lady Caroline—she had discovered her heavenly footing.

Contrary to Mrs. Fisher’s idea of the seemly—but of course contrary; what else would one expect of Mrs. Wilkins?—she did not go to meet her husband at Mezzago, but merely walked down to the point where Beppo’s fly would leave him and his luggage in the street of Castagneto. Mrs. Fisher disliked the arrival of Mr. Wilkins, and was sure that anybody who could have married Mrs. Wilkins must be at least of an injudicious disposition, but a husband, whatever his disposition, should be properly met. Mr. Fisher had always been properly met. Never once in his married life had he gone unmet at a station, nor had he ever not been seen off. These observances, these courtesies, strengthened the bonds of marriage, and made the husband feel he could rely on his wife’s being always there. Always being there was the essential secret for a wife. What would have become of Mr. Fisher if she had neglected to act on this principle she preferred not to think. Enough things became of him as it was; for whatever one’s care in stopping up, married life yet seemed to contain chinks.

Unlike Mrs. Fisher’s view of what was proper—and of course, that’s typical for Mrs. Wilkins—she didn’t go to meet her husband in Mezzago. Instead, she just walked to the spot where Beppo’s taxi would drop him and his luggage off in the streets of Castagneto. Mrs. Fisher wasn't fond of Mr. Wilkins’ arrival and believed that anyone who could marry Mrs. Wilkins had to be somewhat foolish. Still, a husband, no matter his character, deserved a proper welcome. Mr. Fisher had always received that warm welcome. Not once in his married life had he gone through a station without being greeted, nor had he ever left without a send-off. These gestures, these courtesies, strengthened the ties of marriage and made the husband feel he could count on his wife to always be there. Being there was the key to being a good wife. What would have happened to Mr. Fisher if she had ignored this principle was something she preferred not to consider. After all, enough had already happened to him; because no matter how careful one is to seal up the gaps, married life still seemed to have its flaws.

But Mrs. Wilkins took no pains. She just walked down the hill singing—Mrs. Fisher could hear her—and picked up her husband in the street as casually as if he were a pin. The three others, still in bed, for it was not nearly time to get up, heard her as she passed beneath their windows down the zigzag path to meet Mr. Wilkins, who was coming by the morning train, and Scrap smiled, and Rose sighed, and Mrs. Fisher rang her bell and desired Francesca to bring her her breakfast in her room. All three had breakfast that day in their rooms, moved by a common instinct to take cover.

But Mrs. Wilkins didn’t make an effort. She just walked down the hill singing—Mrs. Fisher could hear her—and picked up her husband in the street as casually as if he were a pin. The three others, still in bed since it wasn’t nearly time to get up, heard her as she passed beneath their windows along the zigzag path to meet Mr. Wilkins, who was arriving on the morning train. Scrap smiled, Rose sighed, and Mrs. Fisher rang her bell, asking Francesca to bring her breakfast in her room. All three had breakfast that day in their rooms, driven by a shared instinct to take cover.

Scrap always breakfasted in bed, but she had the same instinct for cover, and during breakfast she made plans for spending the whole day where she was. Perhaps, though, it wouldn’t be as necessary that day as the next. That day, Scrap calculated, Mellersh would be provided for. He would want to have a bath, and having a bath at San Salvatore was an elaborate business, a real adventure if one had a hot one in the bathroom, and it took a lot of time. It involved the attendance of the entire staff—Domenico and the boy Giuseppe coaxing the patent stove to burn, restraining it when it burnt too fiercely, using the bellows to it when it threatened to go out, relighting it when it did go out; Francesca anxiously hovering over the tap regulating its trickle, because if it were turned on too full the water instantly ran cold, and if not full enough the stove blew up inside and mysteriously flooded the house; and Costanza and Angela running up and down bringing pails of hot water from the kitchen to eke out what the tap did.

Scrap always had breakfast in bed, but she had the same instinct for hiding, and during breakfast, she made plans to spend the entire day where she was. However, it might not be as necessary that day as it would be the next. She figured that Mellersh would be taken care of. He would want to take a bath, and taking a bath at San Salvatore was quite a process, a real adventure if one had a hot bath in the bathroom, and it took a lot of time. It required the whole staff—Domenico and the boy Giuseppe coaxing the stove to burn, controlling it when it flared up too much, using the bellows when it threatened to go out, and relighting it when it did go out; Francesca anxiously hovering over the tap to adjust its flow because if it was turned on too high, the water would instantly get cold, and if it wasn't turned on high enough, the stove could explode inside and mysteriously flood the house; and Costanza and Angela running back and forth bringing buckets of hot water from the kitchen to supplement what the tap provided.

This bath had been put in lately, and was at once the pride and the terror of the servants. It was very patent. Nobody quite understood it. There were long printed instructions as to its right treatment hanging on the wall, in which the word pericoloso recurred. When Mrs. Fisher, proceeding on her arrival to the bathroom, saw this word, she went back to her room again and ordered a sponge-bath instead; and when the others found what using the bathroom meant, and how reluctant the servants were to leave them alone with the stove, and how Francesca positively refused to, and stayed with her back turned watching the tap, and how the remaining servants waited anxiously outside the door till the bather came safely out again, they too had sponge-baths brought into their rooms instead.

This bath had been installed recently and was both the pride and the fear of the staff. It was very obvious. Nobody quite got it. There were long printed instructions on how to use it properly hanging on the wall, which included the word pericoloso. When Mrs. Fisher arrived and saw that word in the bathroom, she went back to her room and requested a sponge bath instead; and when the others figured out what using the bathroom really involved, how hesitant the staff was to leave them alone with the heater, and how Francesca flat out refused to leave and instead stood with her back turned, keeping an eye on the faucet, while the other staff waited nervously outside the door until the person bathing came out safely, they also opted for sponge baths in their rooms instead.

Mr. Wilkins, however, was a man, and would be sure to want a big bath. Having it, Scrap calculated, would keep him busy for a long while. Then he would unpack, and then, after his night in the train, he would probably sleep till the evening. So would he be provided for the whole of that day, and not be let loose on them till dinner.

Mr. Wilkins, however, was a man and would definitely want a big bath. Scrap figured that it would keep him occupied for a while. Then he'd unpack, and after his night on the train, he'd probably sleep until the evening. So, they would have him covered for the entire day and wouldn't have to deal with him until dinner.

Therefore Scrap came to the conclusion she would be quite safe in the garden that day, and got up as usual after breakfast, and dawdled as usual through her dressing, listening with a slightly cocked ear to the sounds of Mr. Wilkins’s arrival, of his luggage being carried into Lotty’s room on the other side of the landing, of his educated voice as he inquired of Lotty, first, “Do I give this fellow anything?” and immediately afterwards, “Can I have a hot bath?”—of Lotty’s voice cheerfully assuring him that he needn’t give the fellow anything because he was the gardener, and that yes, he could have a hot bath; and soon after this the landing was filled with the familiar noises of wood being brought, of water being brought, of feet running, of tongues vociferating—in fact, with the preparation of the bath.

So, Scrap figured she would be pretty safe in the garden that day, and got up as usual after breakfast, taking her time getting dressed, while listening with one ear to the sounds of Mr. Wilkins arriving, his luggage being brought into Lotty’s room on the other side of the landing, and his educated voice asking Lotty, first, “Do I give this guy anything?” and then, “Can I have a hot bath?”—Lotty cheerfully assuring him that he didn’t need to give the guy anything because he was the gardener, and yes, he could have a hot bath; and soon after this, the landing was filled with the familiar sounds of wood being carried, water being brought in, feet running, and people talking loudly—in other words, preparing the bath.

Scrap finished dressing, and then loitered at her window, waiting till she should hear Mr. Wilkins go into the bathroom. When he was safely there she would slip out and settle herself in her garden and resume her inquiries into the probable meaning of her life. She was getting on with her inquiries. She dozed much less frequently, and was beginning to be inclined to agree that tawdry was the word to apply to her past. Also she was afraid that her future looked black.

Scrap finished getting ready and then hung out by her window, waiting to hear Mr. Wilkins head into the bathroom. Once he was in there, she would sneak out, get comfortable in her garden, and continue pondering the likely meaning of her life. She was making progress with her thoughts. She dozed off much less often and was starting to agree that "tawdry" was the right word for her past. She was also afraid that her future seemed bleak.

There—she could hear Mr. Wilkins’s educated voice again. Lotty’s door had opened, and he was coming out of it asking his way to the bathroom.

There—she could hear Mr. Wilkins’s educated voice again. Lotty’s door had opened, and he was coming out of it asking how to get to the bathroom.

“It’s where you see the crowd,” Lotty’s voice answered—still a cheerful voice, Scrap was glad to notice.

“It’s where you see the crowd,” Lotty’s voice replied—still cheerful, Scrap was happy to notice.

His steps went along the landing, and Lotty’s steps seemed to go downstairs, and then there seemed to be a brief altercation at the bathroom door—hardly so much an altercation as a chorus of vociferations on one side and a wordless determination, Scrap judged, to have a bath by oneself on the other.

His footsteps echoed on the landing, while Lotty’s sounded like she was heading downstairs. Then there was a short argument at the bathroom door—more of a loud shouting match from one side and a stubborn, silent resolve, Scrap assumed, to take a bath alone from the other.

Mr. Wilkins knew no Italian, and the expression pericoloso left him precisely as it found him—or would have if he had seen it, but naturally he took no notice of the printed matter on the wall. He firmly closed the door on the servants, resisting Domenico, who tried to the last to press through, and locked himself in as a man should for his bath, judicially considering, as he made his simple preparations for getting in, the singular standard of behaviour of these foreigners who, both male and female, apparently wished to stay with him while he bathed. In Finland, he had heard, the female natives not only were present on such occasions but actually washed the bath-taking traveller. He had not heard, however, that this was true too of Italy, which somehow seemed much nearer civilisation—perhaps because one went there, and did not go to Finland.

Mr. Wilkins didn't know any Italian, and the word pericoloso didn't change anything for him—or at least it wouldn't have if he had noticed it, but of course, he ignored the writing on the wall. He firmly shut the door on the servants, resisting Domenico, who tried until the last moment to push his way in, and locked himself in like any man should when taking a bath. As he made his simple preparations, he thought about the strange behavior of these foreigners who, both men and women, seemed to want to stay with him while he bathed. He had heard that in Finland, local women not only attended such occasions but actually washed the traveler taking a bath. However, he hadn’t heard that this was the case in Italy, which somehow felt much closer to civilization—maybe because you visited Italy, but not Finland.

Impartially examining this reflection, and carefully balancing the claims to civilisation of Italy and Finland, Mr. Wilkins got into the bath and turned off the tap. Naturally he turned off the tap. It was what one did. But on the instructions, printed in red letters, was a paragraph saying that the tap should not be turned off as long as there was still fire in the stove. It should be left on—not much on, but on—until the fire was quite out; otherwise, and here again was the word pericoloso, the stove would blow up.

Impartially examining this reflection and carefully weighing the claims to civilization of Italy and Finland, Mr. Wilkins got into the bathtub and turned off the faucet. Naturally, he turned off the faucet. That’s what you do. But on the instructions, printed in red letters, was a note saying that the faucet should not be turned off as long as there was still fire in the stove. It should be left on—not fully on, but on—until the fire was completely out; otherwise, and here again was the word pericoloso, the stove could explode.

Mr. Wilkins got into the bath, turned off the tap, and the stove blew up, exactly as the printed instructions said it would. It blew up, fortunately, only in its inside, but it blew up with a terrific noise, and Mr. Wilkins leapt out of the bath and rushed to the door, and only the instinct born of years of training made him snatch up a towel as he rushed.

Mr. Wilkins climbed into the bath, turned off the tap, and the stove exploded, just like the instructions said it would. Thankfully, it only blew up inside, but it made a huge noise, and Mr. Wilkins jumped out of the bath and sprinted to the door, grabbing a towel purely out of instinct from years of training.

Scrap, half-way across the landing on her way out of doors, heard the explosion.

Scrap, halfway across the landing on her way outside, heard the explosion.

“Good heavens,” she thought, remembering the instructions, “there goes Mr. Wilkins!”

“Good heavens,” she thought, remembering the instructions, “there goes Mr. Wilkins!”

And she ran toward the head of the stairs to call the servants, and as she ran, out ran Mr. Wilkins clutching his towel, and they ran into each other.

And she dashed toward the top of the stairs to call the servants, and as she rushed, Mr. Wilkins burst out, holding his towel, and they collided.

“That damned bath!” cried Mr. Wilkins, perhaps for the only time in his life forgetting himself; but he was upset.

"That damn bath!" shouted Mr. Wilkins, perhaps for the only time in his life losing his composure; but he was really upset.

Here was an introduction. Mr Wilkins, imperfectly concealed in his towel, his shoulders exposed at one end and his legs at the other, and Lady Caroline Dester, to meet whom he had swallowed all his anger with his wife and come out to Italy.

Here was an introduction. Mr. Wilkins, awkwardly wrapped in his towel, with his shoulders bare at one end and his legs at the other, and Lady Caroline Dester, whom he had decided to meet after putting aside all his frustrations with his wife to come out to Italy.

For Lotty in her letter had told him who was at San Salvatore besides herself and Mrs. Arbuthnot, and Mr. Wilkins at once had perceived that this was an opportunity which might never recur. Lotty had merely said, “There are two other women here, Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline Dester,” but that was enough. He knew all about the Droitwiches, their wealth, their connections, their place in history, and the power they had, should they choose to exert it, of making yet another solicitor happy by adding him to those they already employed. Some people employed one solicitor for one branch of their affairs, and another for another. The affairs of the Droitwiches must have many branches. He had also heard—for it was, he considered, part of his business to hear, and having heard to remember—of the beauty of their only daughter. Even if the Droitwiches themselves did not need his services, their daughter might. Beauty led one into strange situations; advice could never come amiss. And should none of them, neither parents nor daughter nor any of their brilliant sons, need him in his professional capacity, it yet was obviously a most valuable acquaintance to make. It opened up vistas. It swelled with possibilities. He might go on living in Hampstead for years, and not again come across such another chance.

Lotty had mentioned in her letter that there were other people at San Salvatore besides her and Mrs. Arbuthnot, and Mr. Wilkins quickly realized that this was an opportunity that might not come around again. Lotty only said, “There are two other women here, Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline Dester,” but that was enough for him. He knew all about the Droitwiches—their wealth, their connections, their history, and the influence they had to make yet another lawyer happy by adding him to the ones they already used. Some people had one lawyer for one part of their business and another for different matters. The Droitwiches must have many business interests. He had also heard—because he thought it was part of his job to gather information and remember it—about the beauty of their only daughter. Even if the Droitwiches didn’t need his services, their daughter might. Beauty often led to unexpected situations; advice was always valuable. And if none of them, including the parents, daughter, or any of their impressive sons, needed him professionally, it was clearly still a worthwhile connection to have. It opened up new opportunities and was full of potential. He could live in Hampstead for years and not come across another chance like this.

Directly his wife’s letter reached him he telegraphed and packed. This was business. He was not a man to lose time when it came to business; nor was he a man to jeopardise a chance by neglecting to be amiable. He met his wife perfectly amiably, aware that amiability under such circumstances was wisdom. Besides, he actually felt amiable—very. For once, Lotty was really helping him. He kissed her affectionately on getting out of Beppo’s fly, and was afraid she must have got up extremely early; he made no complaints of the steepness of the walk up; he told her pleasantly of his journey, and when called upon, obediently admired the views. It was all neatly mapped out in his mind, what he was going to do that first day—have a shave, have a bath, put on clean clothes, sleep a while, and then would come lunch and the introduction to Lady Caroline.

As soon as his wife’s letter arrived, he sent a telegram and packed his things. This was business. He wasn't the type to waste time when it came to business, nor would he take a chance for granted by being unfriendly. He greeted his wife warmly, knowing that being friendly in this situation was smart. Plus, he genuinely felt friendly—very much so. For once, Lotty was really on his side. He kissed her affectionately as he got out of Beppo’s carriage, worried she must have woken up very early; he didn't complain about the steep walk up; he told her happily about his journey, and when needed, he dutifully admired the views. He had everything planned out in his mind for that first day—get a shave, take a bath, put on clean clothes, nap for a bit, and then it would be time for lunch and meeting Lady Caroline.

In the train he had selected the words of his greeting, going over them with care—some slight expression of his gratification in meeting one of whom he, in common with the whole world, had heard—but of course put delicately, very delicately; some slight reference to her distinguished parents and the part her family had played in the history of England—made, of course, with proper tact; a sentence or two about her eldest brother Lord Winchcombe, who had won his V.C. in the late war under circumstances which could only cause—he might or might not add this—every Englishman’s heart to beat higher than ever with pride, and the first steps towards what might well be the turning-point in his career would have been taken.

On the train, he carefully chose his words for greeting—something to show his pleasure in meeting someone he had heard about, just like everyone else had—but he wanted to express it subtly, very subtly. He planned a brief mention of her notable parents and the role her family had played in England's history, done with the right touch. Maybe a sentence or two about her older brother, Lord Winchcombe, who earned his V.C. in the recent war under circumstances that would surely make any Englishman’s heart swell with pride. He might even hint that this was the first step toward what could be a pivotal moment in his career.

And here he was . . . no, it was too terrible, what could be more terrible? Only a towel on, water running off his legs, and that exclamation. He knew at once the lady was Lady Caroline—the minute the exclamation was out he knew it. Rarely did Mr. Wilkins use that word, and never, never in the presence of a lady or a client. While as for the towel—why had he come? Why had he not stayed in Hampstead? It would be impossible to live this down.

And here he was . . . no, it was too awful, what could be worse? Only a towel on, water dripping from his legs, and that outburst. He recognized immediately that the woman was Lady Caroline—he knew it the moment she spoke. Mr. Wilkins hardly ever used that word, and never, ever in front of a woman or a client. As for the towel—why had he come? Why didn’t he just stay in Hampstead? It would be impossible to recover from this.

But Mr. Wilkins was reckoning without Scrap. She, indeed, screwed up her face at the first flash of him on her astonished sight in an enormous effort not to laugh, and having choked the laughter down and got her face serious again, she said as composedly as if he had had all his clothes on, “How do you do.”

But Mr. Wilkins didn't account for Scrap. She made a big effort not to laugh when she first saw him, making a funny face. After managing to hold back her laughter and getting a serious expression again, she said, as calmly as if he were fully dressed, “How do you do.”

What perfect tact. Mr. Wilkins could have worshipped her. This exquisite ignoring. Blue blood, of course, coming out.

What perfect finesse. Mr. Wilkins could have adored her. This beautiful disinterest. Aristocratic background, of course, shining through.

Overwhelmed with gratitude he took her offered hand and said “How do you do,” in his turn, and merely to repeat the ordinary words seemed magically to restore the situation to the normal. Indeed, he was so much relieved, and it was so natural to be shaking hands, to be conventionally greeting, that he forgot he had only a towel on and his professional manner came back to him. He forgot what he was looking like, but he did not forget that this was Lady Caroline Dester, the lady he had come all the way to Italy to see, and he did not forget that it was in her face, her lovely and important face, that he had flung his terrible exclamation. He must at once entreat her forgiveness. To say such a word to a lady—to any lady, but of all ladies to just this one . . .

Overwhelmed with gratitude, he took her offered hand and said, “How do you do,” in return, and just repeating those usual words seemed to magically bring everything back to normal. In fact, he felt so relieved, and it felt so natural to be shaking hands and greeting each other that he forgot he was only wearing a towel, and his professional demeanor returned. He didn't think about how he looked, but he definitely remembered that this was Lady Caroline Dester, the woman he had traveled all the way to Italy to see, and he couldn't forget that it was her lovely and significant face at which he had shouted that terrible exclamation. He needed to immediately ask for her forgiveness. To say such a word to a lady—to any lady, but especially to her…

“I’m afraid I used unpardonable language,” began Mr. Wilkins very earnestly, as earnestly and ceremoniously as if he had had his clothes on.

“I’m afraid I used unacceptable language,” Mr. Wilkins began very seriously, as serious and formally as if he were fully dressed.

“I thought it most appropriate,” said Scrap, who was used to damns.

“I thought it was the most fitting,” said Scrap, who was familiar with damnations.

Mr. Wilkins was incredibly relieved and soothed by this answer. No offence, then, taken. Blue blood again. Only blue blood could afford such a liberal, such an understanding attitude.

Mr. Wilkins felt incredibly relieved and comforted by this response. So no offense was taken, then. Noble lineage again. Only someone with noble lineage could have such a generous, understanding attitude.

“It is Lady Caroline Dester, is it not, to whom I am speaking?” he asked, his voice sounding even more carefully cultivated than usual, for he had to restrain too much pleasure, too much relief, too much of the joy of the pardoned and the shriven from getting into it.

“It’s Lady Caroline Dester, isn’t it, that I’m speaking to?” he asked, his voice sounding even more polished than usual, as he had to hold back too much pleasure, too much relief, and too much of the happiness that comes from being forgiven and free from guilt.

“Yes,” said Scrap; and for the life of her she couldn’t help smiling. She couldn’t help it. She hadn’t meant to smile at Mr. Wilkins, not ever; but really he looked—and then his voice on the top of the rest of him, oblivious of the towel and his legs, and talking just like a church.

“Yes,” said Scrap; and no matter what she did, she couldn't help smiling. She really didn’t mean to smile at Mr. Wilkins, not ever; but honestly, he looked—and then there was his voice on top of everything else, completely unaware of the towel and his legs, talking just like a church.

“Allow me to introduce myself,” said Mr. Wilkins, with the ceremony of the drawing-room. “My name is Mellersh-Wilkins.”

“Let me introduce myself,” said Mr. Wilkins, with the formality of the drawing room. “My name is Mellersh-Wilkins.”

And he instinctively held out his hand a second time at the words.

And he automatically reached out his hand again at the words.

“I thought perhaps it was,” said Scrap, a second time having hers shaken and a second time unable not to smile.

“I thought maybe it was,” said Scrap, shaking hers for the second time and smiling despite herself.

He was about to proceed to the first of the graceful tributes he had prepared in the train, oblivious, as he could not see himself, that he was without his clothes, when the servants came running up the stairs and, simultaneously, Mrs. Fisher appeared in the doorway of her sitting-room. For all this had happened very quickly, and the servants away in the kitchen, and Mrs. Fisher pacing her battlements, had not had time on hearing the noise to appear before the second handshake.

He was about to start the first of the elegant speeches he had prepared on the train, completely unaware, since he couldn’t see himself, that he was without his clothes, when the staff rushed up the stairs and, at the same time, Mrs. Fisher showed up in the doorway of her living room. This all happened very quickly, and the staff in the kitchen, as well as Mrs. Fisher pacing around, didn’t have time to react to the noise before the second handshake.

The servants when they heard the dreaded noise knew at once what had happened, and rushed straight into the bathroom to try and staunch the flood, taking no notice of the figure on the landing in the towel, but Mrs. Fisher did not know what the noise could be, and coming out of her room to inquire stood rooted on the door-sill.

The servants, upon hearing the alarming noise, immediately understood what had occurred and hurried into the bathroom to stop the flooding, ignoring the person in the towel on the landing. However, Mrs. Fisher was clueless about the noise and, stepping out of her room to find out what was happening, froze in the doorway.

It was enough to root anybody. Lady Caroline shaking hands with what evidently, if he had had clothes on, would have been Mrs. Wilkins’s husband, and both of them conversing just as if—

It was enough to shock anyone. Lady Caroline shaking hands with what clearly, if he had been dressed, would have been Mrs. Wilkins’s husband, and both of them chatting just as if—

Then Scrap became aware of Mrs. Fisher. She turned to her at once. “Do let me,” she said gracefully, “introduce Mr. Mellersh-Wilkins. He has just come. This,” she added, turning to Mr. Wilkins, “is Mrs. Fisher.”

Then Scrap noticed Mrs. Fisher. She turned to her immediately. “Let me introduce Mr. Mellersh-Wilkins,” she said gracefully. “He just arrived. This,” she added, turning to Mr. Wilkins, “is Mrs. Fisher.”

And Mr. Wilkins, nothing if not courteous, reacted at once to the conventional formula. First he bowed to the elderly lady in the doorway, then he crossed over to her, his wet feet leaving footprints as he went, and having got to her he politely held out his hand.

And Mr. Wilkins, always polite, immediately responded to the usual greeting. First, he bowed to the elderly woman in the doorway, then he walked over to her, his wet feet leaving footprints behind him, and once he reached her, he graciously extended his hand.

“It is a pleasure,” said Mr. Wilkins in his carefully modulated voice, “to meet a friend of my wife’s.”

“It’s a pleasure,” said Mr. Wilkins in his carefully controlled voice, “to meet a friend of my wife’s.”

Scrap melted away down into the garden.

Scrap melted away into the garden.

Chapter 15

The strange effect of this incident was that when they met that evening at dinner both Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline had a singular feeling of secret understanding with Mr. Wilkins. He could not be to them as other men. He could not be to them as he would have been if they had met him in his clothes. There was a sense of broken ice; they felt at once intimate and indulgent; almost they felt to him as nurses do—as those feel who have assisted either patients or young children at their baths. They were acquainted with Mr. Wilkins’s legs.

The odd thing about this incident was that when they came together that evening at dinner, both Mrs. Fisher and Lady Caroline felt a strange, shared understanding with Mr. Wilkins. He couldn't be to them like other men. He couldn't be to them as he would have been if they had met him dressed normally. There was a sense of having crossed a line; they felt both close and forgiving towards him; they almost felt about him like nurses do—as those who have helped either patients or young children during their baths. They were familiar with Mr. Wilkins’s legs.

What Mrs. Fisher said to him that morning in her first shock will never be known, but what Mr. Wilkins said to her in reply, when reminded by what she was saying of his condition, was so handsome in its apology, so proper in its confusion, that she had ended by being quite sorry for him and completely placated. After all, it was an accident, and nobody could help accidents. And when she saw him next at dinner, dressed, polished, spotless as to linen and sleek as to hair, she felt this singular sensation of a secret understanding with him and, added to it, of a kind of almost personal pride in his appearance, now that he was dressed, which presently extended in some subtle way to an almost personal pride in everything he said.

What Mrs. Fisher said to him that morning during her initial shock will never be known, but Mr. Wilkins’ response to her, when she reminded him of his situation, was so gracious in its apology and so appropriate in its awkwardness that she ended up feeling quite sympathetic towards him and completely pacified. After all, it was an accident, and no one can prevent accidents. When she saw him again at dinner, dressed, polished, immaculate in his linen, and his hair sleek, she experienced a strange feeling of secret understanding with him, along with a kind of personal pride in his appearance now that he was dressed, which subtly grew into a personal pride in everything he said.

There was no doubt whatever in Mrs. Fisher’s mind that a man was infinitely preferable as a companion to a woman. Mr. Wilkins’s presence and conversation at once raised the standard of the dinner-table from that of a bear garden—yes, a bear garden—to that of a civilised social gathering. He talked as men talk, about interesting subjects, and, though most courteous to Lady Caroline, showed no traces of dissolving into simpers and idiocy whenever he addressed her. He was, indeed, precisely as courteous to Mrs. Fisher herself; and when for the first time at that table politics were introduced, he listened to her with the proper seriousness on her exhibiting a desire to speak, and treated her opinions with the attention they deserved. He appeared to think much as she did about Lloyd George, and in regard to literature he was equally sound. In fact there was real conversation, and he liked nuts. How he could have married Mrs. Wilkins was a mystery.

Mrs. Fisher had no doubt that having a man as a companion was far better than having a woman. Mr. Wilkins’s presence and conversation immediately lifted the atmosphere of the dinner table from that of a chaotic scene—yes, a chaotic scene—to that of a civilized social gathering. He spoke like men do, about interesting topics, and although he was very polite to Lady Caroline, he didn’t turn into a blushing fool when he spoke to her. He was just as polite to Mrs. Fisher as well; and when, for the first time at that table, politics came up, he listened to her seriously when she showed a desire to speak, treating her opinions with the respect they deserved. He seemed to share her views on Lloyd George, and he was equally knowledgeable about literature. In fact, there was real conversation, and he liked nuts. How he ended up marrying Mrs. Wilkins was a mystery.

Lotty, for her part, looked on with round eyes. She had expected Mellersh to take at least two days before he got to this stage, but the San Salvatore spell had worked instantly. It was not only that he was pleasant at dinner, for she had always seen him pleasant at dinners with other people, but he had been pleasant all day privately—so pleasant that he had complimented her on her looks while she was brushing out her hair, and kissed her. Kissed her! And it was neither good-morning nor good-night.

Lotty, for her part, watched with wide eyes. She had thought it would take Mellersh at least two days to reach this point, but the San Salvatore charm had kicked in immediately. It wasn't just that he was nice at dinner—she had always seen him be that way with other people—but he had been nice all day in private. He was so nice that he complimented her on her looks while she was brushing her hair and kissed her. Kissed her! And it wasn't a good-morning or good-night kiss.

Well, this being so, she would put off telling him the truth about her nest-egg, and about Rose not being his hostess after all, till next day. Pity to spoil things. She had been going to blurt it out as soon as he had had a rest, but it did seem a pity to disturb such a very beautiful frame of mind as that of Mellersh this first day. Let him too get more firmly fixed in heaven. Once fixed he wouldn’t mind anything.

Well, since that's the case, she decided to hold off on telling him the truth about her savings, and that Rose wasn't actually his hostess, until the next day. It seemed a shame to ruin the moment. She had planned to spill the beans as soon as he had a chance to rest, but it really did feel like a pity to disrupt such a lovely state of mind as Mellersh's on this first day. Let him settle in heaven a bit more. Once he's settled, he wouldn’t care about anything.

Her face sparkled with delight at the instantaneous effect of San Salvatore. Even the catastrophe of the bath, of which she had been told when she came in from the garden, had not shaken him. Of course all that he had needed was a holiday. What a brute she had been to him when he wanted to take her himself to Italy. But this arrangement, as it happened, was ever so much better, though not through any merit of hers. She talked and laughed gaily, not a shred of fear of him left in her, and even when she said, struck by his spotlessness, that he looked so clean that one could eat one’s dinner off him, and Scrap laughed, Mellersh laughed too. He would have minded that at home, supposing that at home she had had the spirit to say it.

Her face lit up with joy at the immediate effect of San Salvatore. Even the disaster of the bath, which she had heard about when she came in from the garden, hadn’t disturbed him. Really, all he needed was a vacation. What a jerk she had been to him when he wanted to take her to Italy himself. But this plan turned out to be so much better, though it wasn’t thanks to her. She chatted and laughed happily, with no trace of fear toward him left in her, and even when she remarked, impressed by how clean he looked, that he was so tidy one could have dinner off him, and Scrap laughed, Mellersh laughed too. He would have been upset by that at home, assuming she had had the courage to say it there.

It was a successful evening. Scrap, whenever she looked at Mr. Wilkins, saw him in his towel, dripping water, and felt indulgent. Mrs. Fisher was delighted with him. Rose was a dignified hostess in Mr. Wilkins’s eyes, quiet and dignified, and he admired the way she waived her right to preside at the head of the table—as a graceful compliment, of course, to Mrs. Fisher’s age. Mrs. Arbuthnot was, opined Mr. Wilkins, naturally retiring. She was the most retiring of the three ladies. He had met her before dinner alone for a moment in the drawing-room, and had expressed in appropriate language his sense of her kindness in wishing him to join her party, and she had been retiring. Was she shy? Probably. She had blushed, and murmured as if in deprecation, and then the others had come in. At dinner she talked least. He would, of course, become better acquainted with her during the next few days, and it would be a pleasure, he was sure.

It was a successful evening. Whenever Scrap looked at Mr. Wilkins, she saw him in his towel, dripping wet, and felt indulgent. Mrs. Fisher was thrilled with him. Rose appeared dignified to Mr. Wilkins, quiet and composed, and he admired how she graciously chose not to sit at the head of the table—as a respectful nod to Mrs. Fisher’s age. Mr. Wilkins thought Mrs. Arbuthnot was naturally shy. She was the most reserved of the three women. He had briefly met her alone in the drawing-room before dinner and had expressed his gratitude for her inviting him to join her group, and she had seemed modest. Was she shy? Probably. She had blushed and murmured as if trying to downplay the situation, and then the others had arrived. At dinner, she said the least. He was sure he would get to know her better over the next few days, and it would be a pleasure.

Meanwhile Lady Caroline was all and more than all Mr. Wilkins had imagined, and had received his speeches, worked in skilfully between the courses, graciously; Mrs. Fisher was the exact old lady he had been hoping to come across all his professional life; and Lotty had not only immensely improved, but was obviously au mieux—Mr. Wilkins knew what was necessary in French—with Lady Caroline. He had been much tormented during the day by the thought of how he had stood conversing with Lady Caroline forgetful of his not being dressed, and had at last written her a note most deeply apologising, and beseeching her to overlook his amazing, his incomprehensible obliviousness, to which she had replied in pencil on the back of the envelope, “Don’t worry.” And he had obeyed her commands, and had put it from him. The result was he was now in great contentment. Before going to sleep that night he pinched his wife’s ear. She was amazed. These endearments . . .

Meanwhile, Lady Caroline was everything Mr. Wilkins had imagined and even more. She graciously received his speeches and expertly navigated the conversation between courses. Mrs. Fisher was exactly the kind of old lady he had hoped to meet throughout his professional life. Lotty had not only improved tremendously, but she also seemed completely at ease—Mr. Wilkins knew what that meant in French—around Lady Caroline. He had been quite troubled during the day, thinking about how he had been talking to Lady Caroline while completely disregarding that he wasn't dressed properly. In the end, he wrote her a note sincerely apologizing and asking her to forgive his astonishing and puzzling lack of awareness, to which she replied in pencil on the back of the envelope, "Don’t worry." He took her advice and put it out of his mind. As a result, he felt a deep sense of contentment. Before going to sleep that night, he playfully pinched his wife’s ear. She was surprised. These little acts of affection...

What is more, the morning brought no relapse in Mr. Wilkins, and he kept up to this high level throughout the day, in spite of its being the first day of the second week, and therefore pay day.

What’s more, the morning brought no setback for Mr. Wilkins, and he maintained this high level throughout the day, despite it being the first day of the second week, and therefore payday.

Its being pay day precipitated Lotty’s confession, which she had, when it came to the point, been inclined to put off a little longer. She was not afraid, she dared anything, but Mellersh was in such an admirable humour—why risk clouding it just yet? When, however, soon after breakfast Costanza appeared with a pile of very dirty little bits of paper covered with sums in pencil, and having knocked at Mrs. Fisher’s door and been sent away, and at Lady Caroline’s door and been sent away, and at Rose’s door and had no answer because Rose had gone out, she waylaid Lotty, who was showing Mellersh over the house, and pointed to the bits of paper and talked very rapidly and loud, and shrugged her shoulders a great deal, and kept on pointing at the bits of paper, Lotty remembered that a week had passed without anybody paying anything to anyone, and that the moment had come to settle up.

The fact that it was pay day prompted Lotty to finally confess, something she had been leaning towards delaying a bit longer. She wasn’t scared; she would face anything, but Mellersh was in such a great mood—why risk ruining it just yet? However, soon after breakfast, when Costanza showed up with a stack of very grimy little pieces of paper filled with pencil calculations, and after being sent away from Mrs. Fisher’s door, then Lady Caroline’s door, and getting no response from Rose’s door because Rose had gone out, she intercepted Lotty, who was giving Mellersh a tour of the house. Costanza pointed at the papers, spoke very quickly and loudly, shrugged her shoulders a lot, and kept pointing at the papers, which made Lotty remember that a week had gone by without anyone paying anything to anyone, and that it was time to settle up.

“Does this good lady want something?” inquired Mr. Wilkins mellifluously.

“Does this lovely lady want something?” Mr. Wilkins asked smoothly.

“Money,” said Lotty.

“Money,” said Lotty.

“Money?”

"Cash?"

“It’s the housekeeping bills.”

“It's the cleaning bills.”

“Well, you have nothing to do with those,” said Mr. Wilkins serenely.

“Well, you’re not involved with those,” said Mr. Wilkins calmly.

“Oh yes, I have—”

“Oh yeah, I have—”

And the confession was precipitated.

And the confession was triggered.

It was wonderful how Mellersh took it. One would have imagined that his sole idea about the nest-egg had always been that it should be lavished on just this. He did not, as he would have done at home, cross-examine her; he accepted everything as it came pouring out, about her fibs and all, and when she had finished and said, “You have every right to be angry, I think, but I hope you won’t be and will forgive me instead,” he merely asked, “What can be more beneficial than such a holiday?”

It was amazing how Mellersh handled it. One might have thought his only idea about the nest egg was that it should be spent on exactly this. He didn't, as he would have done at home, grill her; he took everything in as it flowed out, including her little lies, and when she finished and said, “You have every right to be upset, I think, but I hope you won't be and will forgive me instead,” he simply asked, “What could be better than a holiday like this?”

Whereupon she put her arm through his and held it tight and said, “Oh, Mellersh, you really are too sweet!”—her face red with pride in him.

Whereupon she linked her arm through his and held it tightly, saying, “Oh, Mellersh, you’re just the sweetest!”—her face flushed with pride in him.

That he should so quickly assimilate the atmosphere, that he should at once become nothing but kindness, showed surely what a real affinity he had with good and beautiful things. He belonged quite naturally in this place of heavenly calm. He was—extraordinary how she had misjudged him—by nature a child of light. Fancy not minding the dreadful fibs she had gone in for before leaving home; fancy passing even those over without comment. Wonderful. Yet not wonderful, for wasn’t he in heaven? In heaven nobody minded any of those done-with things, one didn’t even trouble to forgive and forget, one was much too happy. She pressed his arm tight in her gratitude and appreciation; and though he did not withdraw his, neither did he respond to her pressure. Mr. Wilkins was of a cool habit, and rarely had any real wish to press.

That he could so quickly adapt to the atmosphere, instantly becoming nothing but kindness, clearly showed his genuine connection to good and beautiful things. He naturally belonged in this serene place. It was extraordinary how she had misjudged him—by nature, he was a child of light. Imagine not caring about the awful lies she had told before leaving home; imagine brushing even those aside without a word. Amazing. Yet not surprising, because wasn’t he in heaven? In heaven, no one cared about those past issues; there was no need to forgive and forget, everyone was just too happy. She held his arm tightly in gratitude and appreciation; and while he didn’t pull away, he also didn’t respond to her touch. Mr. Wilkins had a cool demeanor and rarely felt any real desire to engage.

Meanwhile, Costanza, perceiving that she had lost the Wilkinses’ ear had gone back to Mrs. Fisher, who at least understood Italian, besides being clearly in the servants’ eyes the one of the party marked down by age and appearance to pay the bills; and to her, while Mrs. Fisher put the final touches to her toilette, for she was preparing, by means of putting on a hat and veil and feather boa and gloves, to go for her first stroll in the lower garden—positively her first since her arrival—she explained that unless she was given money to pay the last week’s bills the shops of Castagneto would refuse credit for the current week’s food. Not even credit would they give, affirmed Costanza, who had been spending a great deal and was anxious to pay all her relations what was owed them and also to find out how her mistresses took it, for that day’s meals. Soon it would be the hour of colazione, and how could there be colazione without meat, without fish, without eggs, without—

Meanwhile, Costanza, realizing that she had lost the Wilkinses’ attention, went back to Mrs. Fisher, who at least understood Italian and was clearly considered by the servants to be the one who would handle the bills due to her age and appearance. As Mrs. Fisher finished getting ready—putting on a hat, a veil, a feather boa, and gloves for her first stroll in the lower garden, which was definitely her first since her arrival—Costanza explained that unless she was given money to pay last week’s bills, the shops in Castagneto would refuse to extend credit for this week’s groceries. They wouldn’t even give credit, Costanza insisted, as she had been spending quite a bit and wanted to settle all debts with her relatives while also figuring out how her mistresses were managing meals for the day. The time for colazione would soon arrive, and how could there be colazione without meat, without fish, without eggs, without—

Mrs. Fisher took the bills out of her hand and looked at the total; and she was so much astonished by its size, so much horrified by the extravagance to which it testified, that she sat down at her writing-table to go into the thing thoroughly.

Mrs. Fisher took the bills out of her hand and looked at the total; she was so shocked by how much it was, so horrified by the extravagance it represented, that she sat down at her writing desk to analyze it thoroughly.

Costanza had a very bad half-hour. She had not supposed it was in the English to be so mercenary. And then la Vecchia, as she was called in the kitchen, knew so much Italian, and with a doggedness that filled Costanza with shame on her behalf, for such conduct was the last one expected from the noble English, she went through item after item, requiring and persisting till she got them, explanations.

Costanza had a really rough half-hour. She never thought the English could be so money-driven. And then la Vecchia, as they called her in the kitchen, knew so much Italian, and with a determination that made Costanza feel ashamed for her, because such behavior was the last thing expected from the noble English, she went through each item, asking for explanations and refusing to back down until she got them.

There were no explanations, except that Costanza had had one glorious week of doing exactly as she chose, of splendid unbridled licence, and that this was the result.

There were no explanations, except that Costanza had one amazing week of doing exactly what she wanted, with total freedom, and that this was the outcome.

Costanza, having no explanations, wept. It was miserable to think she would have to cook from now on under watchfulness, under suspicion; and what would her relations say when they found the orders they received were whittled down? They would say she had no influence; they would despise her.

Costanza, without any explanations, cried. It was awful to think she would have to cook from now on while being watched and suspected; and what would her relatives say when they discovered the orders they received were reduced? They would say she had no influence; they would look down on her.

Costanza wept, but Mrs. Fisher was unmoved. In slow and splendid Italian, with the roll of the cantos of the Inferno, she informed her that she would pay no bills till the following week, and that meanwhile the food was to be precisely as good as ever, and at a quarter the cost.

Costanza cried, but Mrs. Fisher didn't budge. In slow and beautiful Italian, reminiscent of the verses from the Inferno, she told her that she wouldn't pay any bills until next week, and in the meantime, the food had to be just as good as always, but at a quarter of the price.

Costanza threw up her hands.

Costanza raised her hands.

Next week, proceeded Mrs. Fisher unmoved, if she found this had been so she would pay the whole. Otherwise—she paused; for what she would do otherwise she did not know herself. But she paused and looked impenetrable, majestic and menacing, and Costanza was cowed.

Next week, Mrs. Fisher continued without any signs of emotion, if she found that this was true, she would cover the entire cost. Otherwise—she hesitated; she herself didn’t know what she would do instead. But she paused and looked unreadable, impressive, and intimidating, and Costanza felt intimidated.

Then Mrs. Fisher, having dismissed her with a gesture, went in search of Lady Caroline to complain. She had been under the impression that Lady Caroline ordered the meals and therefore was responsible for the prices, but now it appeared that the cook had been left to do exactly as she pleased ever since they got there, which of course was simply disgraceful.

Then Mrs. Fisher, having waved her off, went to find Lady Caroline to complain. She had thought that Lady Caroline was in charge of the meals and therefore responsible for the prices, but now it seemed that the cook had been allowed to do whatever she wanted ever since they arrived, which was simply outrageous.

Scrap was not in her bedroom, but the room, on Mrs. Fisher’s opening the door, for she suspected her of being in it and only pretending not to hear the knock, was still flowerlike from her presence.

Scrap wasn't in her bedroom, but when Mrs. Fisher opened the door, she suspected Scrap was inside and just pretending not to hear the knock. The room still had a floral quality from her presence.

“Scent,” sniffed Mrs. Fisher, shutting it again; and she wished Carlyle could have had five minutes’ straight talk with this young woman. And yet—perhaps even he—

“Scent,” sniffed Mrs. Fisher, shutting it again; and she wished Carlyle could have had five minutes of honest conversation with this young woman. And yet—perhaps even he—

She went downstairs to go into the garden in search of her, and in the hall encountered Mr. Wilkins. He had his hat on, and was lighting a cigar.

She went downstairs to head into the garden to look for her, and in the hallway, she ran into Mr. Wilkins. He was wearing his hat and lighting a cigar.

Indulgent as Mrs. Fisher felt towards Mr. Wilkins, and peculiarly and even mystically related after the previous morning’s encounter, she yet could not like a cigar in the house. Out of doors she endured it, but it was not necessary, when out of doors was such a big place, to indulge the habit indoors. Even Mr. Fisher, who had been, she should say, a man originally tenacious of habits, had quite soon after marriage got out of this one.

Indulgent as Mrs. Fisher felt towards Mr. Wilkins, and connected in a unique and almost mystical way after their encounter the previous morning, she still couldn’t stand having a cigar in the house. She tolerated it outside, but it wasn't necessary to indulge the habit indoors when the outdoors was such a vast space. Even Mr. Fisher, who had initially been someone pretty attached to his habits, quickly gave up this one after they got married.

However, Mr. Wilkins, snatching off his hat on seeing her, instantly threw the cigar away. He threw it into the water a great jar of arum lilies presumably contained, and Mrs. Fisher, aware of the value men attach to their newly-lit cigars, could not but be impressed by this immediate and magnificent amende honorable.

However, Mr. Wilkins, taking off his hat when he saw her, immediately tossed aside the cigar. He threw it into the water, which presumably held a large jar of arum lilies, and Mrs. Fisher, knowing how much men value their freshly lit cigars, couldn't help but be impressed by this quick and grand gesture of apology.

But the cigar did not reach the water. It got caught in the lilies, and smoked on by itself among them, a strange and depraved-looking object.

But the cigar didn't make it to the water. It got stuck in the lilies and continued to smolder by itself among them, a strange and twisted-looking thing.

“Where are you going to, my prett—” began Mr. Wilkins, advancing towards Mrs. Fisher; but he broke off just in time.

“Where are you going, my pretty—” started Mr. Wilkins, moving toward Mrs. Fisher; but he stopped just in time.

Was it morning spirits impelling him to address Mrs. Fisher in the terms of a nursery rhyme? He wasn’t even aware that he knew the thing. Most strange. What could have put it, at such a moment, into his self-possessed head? He felt great respect for Mrs. Fisher, and would not for the world have insulted her by addressing her as a maid, pretty or otherwise. He wished to stand well with her. She was a woman of parts, and also, he suspected, of property. At breakfast they had been most pleasant together, and he had been struck by her apparent intimacy with well-known persons. Victorians, of course; but it was restful to talk about them after the strain of his brother-in-law’s Georgian parties on Hampstead Heath. He and she were getting on famously, he felt. She already showed all the symptoms of presently wishing to become a client. Not for the world would he offend her. He turned a little cold at the narrowness of his escape.

Was it the morning spirit pushing him to talk to Mrs. Fisher like he was reciting a nursery rhyme? He didn’t even realize he knew it. How odd. What could have made it pop into his composed mind at that moment? He had a lot of respect for Mrs. Fisher and would never think of insulting her by calling her a maid, whether pretty or not. He wanted to make a good impression on her. She was a capable woman and, he suspected, had some money. At breakfast, they had a lovely conversation, and he was impressed by her apparent familiarity with famous people. Victorians, of course; but it was nice to discuss them after the pressure of his brother-in-law’s Georgian parties in Hampstead Heath. He felt they were getting along well. She was already showing signs that she might want to become a client soon. He absolutely didn’t want to offend her. He felt a chill at how narrowly he had escaped that.

She had not, however, noticed.

She hadn't noticed, though.

“You are going out,” he said very politely, all readiness should she confirm his assumption to accompany her.

“You're going out,” he said politely, fully prepared in case she agreed to let him join her.

“I want to find Lady Caroline,” said Mrs. Fisher, going towards the glass door leading into the top garden.

“I want to find Lady Caroline,” said Mrs. Fisher, walking towards the glass door that led to the upper garden.

“An agreeable quest,” remarked Mr. Wilkins. “May I assist in the search? Allow me—” he added, opening the door for her.

“An enjoyable quest,” said Mr. Wilkins. “Can I help with the search? Let me—” he added, opening the door for her.

“She usually sits over in that corner behind the bushes,” said Mrs. Fisher. “And I don’t know about it being an agreeable quest. She has been letting the bills run up in the most terrible fashion, and needs a good scolding.”

“She usually sits in that corner behind the bushes,” said Mrs. Fisher. “And I’m not sure it’s a pleasant task. She has been letting the bills pile up in the worst way and needs a good talking-to.”

“Lady Caroline?” said Mr. Wilkins, unable to follow such an attitude. “What has Lady Caroline, if I may inquire, to do with the bills here?”

“Lady Caroline?” Mr. Wilkins asked, confused by her attitude. “What does Lady Caroline have to do with the bills here, if I may ask?”

“The housekeeping was left to her, and as we all share alike it ought to have been a matter of honour with her—”

“The housekeeping was her responsibility, and since we all share equally, it should have been a matter of pride for her—”

“But—Lady Caroline housekeeping for the party here? A party which includes my wife? My dear lady, you render me speechless. Do you not know she is the daughter of the Droitwiches?”

“But—Lady Caroline hosting the party here? A party that includes my wife? My dear lady, you’ve left me speechless. Don’t you know she’s the daughter of the Droitwiches?”

“Oh, is that who she is,” said Mrs. Fisher, scrunching heavily over the pebbles towards the hidden corner. “Well, that accounts for it. The muddle that man Droitwich made in his department in the war was a national scandal. It amounted to misappropriation of the public funds.”

“Oh, is that who she is?” said Mrs. Fisher, heavily stepping over the pebbles toward the hidden corner. “Well, that explains it. The mess that guy Droitwich caused in his department during the war was a national scandal. It was basically stealing from the public funds.”

“But it is impossible, I assure you, to expect the daughter of the Droitwiches—” began Mr. Wilkins earnestly.

“But it’s impossible, I promise you, to expect the daughter of the Droitwiches—” began Mr. Wilkins earnestly.

“The Droitwiches,” interrupted Mrs. Fisher, “are neither here nor there. Duties undertaken should be performed. I don’t intend my money to be squandered for the sake of any Droitwiches.”

“The Droitwiches,” Mrs. Fisher cut in, “are irrelevant. If you take on responsibilities, you need to follow through. I won’t let my money be wasted because of any Droitwiches.”

A headstrong old lady. Perhaps not so easy to deal with as he had hoped. But how wealthy. Only the consciousness of great wealth would make her snap her fingers in this manner at the Droitwiches. Lotty, on being questioned, had been vague about her circumstances, and had described her house as a mausoleum with gold-fish swimming about in it; but now he was sure she was more than very well off. Still, he wished he had not joined her at this moment, for he had no sort of desire to be present at such a spectacle as the scolding of Lady Caroline Dester.

A stubborn old lady. Maybe not as easy to handle as he’d hoped. But what wealth! Only the awareness of such great wealth would make her snap her fingers at the Droitwiches like that. Lotty, when asked, had been vague about her situation and described her house as a mausoleum with goldfish swimming around in it; but now he was certain she was more than just well off. Still, he wished he hadn't joined her at that moment, as he had no desire to witness the spectacle of Lady Caroline Dester being scolded.

Again, however, he was reckoning without Scrap. Whatever she felt when she looked up and beheld Mr. Wilkins discovering her corner on the very first morning, nothing but angelicness appeared on her face. She took her feet off the parapet on Mrs. Fisher’s sitting down on it, and listening gravely to her opening remarks as to her not having any money to fling about in reckless and uncontrolled household expenditure, interrupted her flow by pulling one of the cushions from behind her head and offering it to her.

Again, however, he underestimated Scrap. Whatever she felt when she looked up to see Mr. Wilkins finding her spot on the very first morning, her face showed nothing but innocence. She removed her feet from the ledge as Mrs. Fisher sat down on it, listening seriously to her initial comments about not having money to waste on reckless and uncontrolled household spending, and interrupted her by grabbing one of the cushions from behind her head and offering it to her.

“Sit on this,” said Scrap, holding it out. “You’ll be more comfortable.”

“Sit on this,” Scrap said, extending it out. “You’ll feel more comfortable.”

Mr. Wilkins leapt to relieve her of it.

Mr. Wilkins jumped in to help her with it.

“Oh, thanks,” said Mrs. Fisher, interrupted.

“Oh, thanks,” Mrs. Fisher said, cutting in.

It was difficult to get into the swing again. Mr. Wilkins inserted the cushion solicitously between the slightly raised Mrs. Fisher and the stone of the parapet, and again she had to say “Thanks.” It was interrupted. Besides, Lady Caroline said nothing in her defence; she only looked at her, and listened with the face of an attentive angel.

It was tough to get back into the rhythm. Mr. Wilkins carefully placed the cushion between the slightly elevated Mrs. Fisher and the stone parapet, and once more she had to say “Thanks.” It was cut short. Plus, Lady Caroline didn’t say anything to defend her; she just looked at her and listened with the expression of an attentive angel.

It seemed to Mr. Wilkins that it must be difficult to scold a Dester who looked like that and so exquisitely said nothing. Mrs. Fisher, he was glad to see, gradually found it difficult herself, for her severity slackened, and she ended by saying lamely, “You ought to have told me you were not doing it.”

It seemed to Mr. Wilkins that it must be tough to scold a Dester who looked like that and so perfectly said nothing. Mrs. Fisher, he was relieved to notice, gradually found it hard herself, as her strictness loosened, and she ended up saying weakly, “You should have told me you weren't doing it.”

“I didn’t know you thought I was,” said the lovely voice.

“I didn’t know you thought I was,” said the lovely voice.

“I would now like to know,” said Mrs. Fisher, “what you propose to do for the rest of the time here.”

“I would like to know,” said Mrs. Fisher, “what you plan to do for the rest of the time here.”

“Nothing,” said Scrap, smiling.

"Nothing," Scrap said, smiling.

“Nothing? Do you mean to say—”

"Nothing? Are you implying—"

“If I may be allowed, ladies,” interposed Mr. Wilkins in his suavest professional manner, “to make a suggestion”—they both looked at him, and remembering him as they first saw him felt indulgent—“I would advise you not to spoil a delightful holiday with worries over housekeeping.”

“If you don’t mind me stepping in, ladies,” Mr. Wilkins said in his smoothest professional tone, “I’d like to make a suggestion”—they both turned to him, and remembering their first impression of him felt forgiving—“I recommend that you don’t ruin a wonderful holiday by stressing over housekeeping.”

“Exactly,” said Mrs. Fisher. “It is what I intend to avoid.”

“Exactly,” said Mrs. Fisher. “That's what I'm trying to avoid.”

“Most sensible,” said Mr. Wilkins. “Why not, then,” he continued, “allow the cook—an excellent cook, by the way—so much a head per diem”—Mr. Wilkins knew what was necessary in Latin—“and tell her that for this sum she must cater for you, and not only cater but cater as well as ever? One could easily reckon it out. The charges of a moderate hotel, for instance, would do as a basis, halved, or perhaps even quartered.”

“Most sensible,” said Mr. Wilkins. “Why not, then,” he continued, “give the cook—an excellent cook, by the way—so much per person per day”—Mr. Wilkins knew what was necessary in Latin—“and let her know that for this amount she has to take care of you, and not just take care of you but do it as well as she ever has? It would be easy to figure it out. The rates of a decent hotel, for example, could serve as a starting point, divided in half, or maybe even quartered.”

“And this week that has just passed?” asked Mrs. Fisher. “The terrible bills of this first week? What about them?”

“And what about last week?” Mrs. Fisher asked. “The awful bills from the first week? What will happen with them?”

“They shall be my present to San Salvatore,” said Scrap, who didn’t like the idea of Lotty’s nest-egg being reduced so much beyond what she was prepared for.

“They’ll be my gift to San Salvatore,” said Scrap, who wasn’t comfortable with the idea of Lotty’s savings being cut down so much more than she expected.

There was a silence. The ground was cut from under Mrs. Fisher’s feet.

There was silence. The ground was pulled out from under Mrs. Fisher’s feet.

“Of course if you choose to throw your money about—” she said at last, disapproving but immensely relieved, while Mr. Wilkins was rapt in the contemplation of the precious qualities of blue blood. This readiness, for instance, not to trouble about money, this free-handedness—it was not only what one admired in others, admired in others perhaps more than anything else, but it was extraordinarily useful to the professional classes. When met with it should be encouraged by warmth of reception. Mrs. Fisher was not warm. She accepted—from which he deduced that with her wealth went closeness—but she accepted grudgingly. Presents were presents, and one did not look them in this manner in the mouth, he felt; and if Lady Caroline found her pleasure in presenting his wife and Mrs. Fisher with their entire food for a week, it was their part to accept gracefully. One should not discourage gifts.

“Of course, if you decide to spend your money like that—” she finally said, disapproving but immensely relieved, while Mr. Wilkins was lost in admiration for the rarefied qualities of aristocracy. This attitude, for example, of not worrying about money, this generosity—it was not only what people admired in others, maybe even more than anything else, but it was incredibly helpful to the working class. When encountered, it should be met with a warm reception. Mrs. Fisher was not warm. She accepted—leading him to conclude that along with her wealth came stinginess—but she accepted it reluctantly. Gifts were gifts, and one shouldn’t scrutinize them so closely, he thought; and if Lady Caroline enjoyed providing his wife and Mrs. Fisher with their entire food supply for a week, it was their responsibility to accept it graciously. One should not discourage generosity.

On behalf of his wife, then, Mr. Wilkins expressed what she would wish to express, and remarking to Lady Caroline—with a touch of lightness, for so should gifts be accepted in order to avoid embarrassing the donor—that she had in that case been his wife’s hostess since her arrival, he turned almost gaily to Mrs. Fisher and pointed out that she and his wife must now jointly write Lady Caroline the customary letter of thanks for hospitality. “A Collins,” said Mr. Wilkins, who knew what was necessary in literature. “I prefer the name Collins for such a letter to either that of Board and Lodging or Bread and Butter. Let us call it a Collins.”

On behalf of his wife, Mr. Wilkins conveyed her feelings and remarked to Lady Caroline—with a hint of lightness to keep the moment easy and avoid making the donor uncomfortable—that she had been his wife’s hostess since her arrival. He then cheerfully turned to Mrs. Fisher and pointed out that they should both write Lady Caroline the usual thank-you letter for her hospitality. “A Collins,” said Mr. Wilkins, who understood what was needed in writing. “I prefer calling it a Collins instead of Board and Lodging or Bread and Butter. Let’s go with Collins.”

Scrap smiled, and held out her cigarette case. Mrs. Fisher could not help being mollified. A way out of waste was going to be found, thanks to Mr. Wilkins, and she hated waste quite as much as having to pay for it; also a way was found out of housekeeping. For a moment she had thought that if everybody tried to force her into housekeeping on her brief holiday by their own indifference (Lady Caroline), or inability to speak Italian (the other two), she would have to send for Kate Lumley after all. Kate could do it. Kate and she had learnt Italian together. Kate would only be allowed to come on condition that she did do it.

Scrap smiled and offered her cigarette case. Mrs. Fisher couldn’t help but feel a bit better. A solution for waste was going to be found, thanks to Mr. Wilkins, and she hated waste just as much as she disliked paying for it; plus, a solution for housekeeping was also emerging. For a moment, she thought that if everyone kept trying to force her into housekeeping on her short holiday by their own indifference (Lady Caroline) or inability to speak Italian (the other two), she would have to call Kate Lumley after all. Kate could handle it. Kate and she had learned Italian together. Kate would only be allowed to come if she actually did it.

But this was much better, this way of Mr. Wilkins’s. Really a most superior man. There was nothing like an intelligent, not too young man for profitable and pleasurable companionship. And when she got up, the business for which she had come being settled, and said she now intended to take a little stroll before lunch, Mr. Wilkins did not stay with Lady Caroline, as most of the men she had known would, she was afraid, have wanted to—he asked to be permitted to go and stroll with her; so that he evidently definitely preferred conversation to faces. A sensible, companionable man. A clever, well-read man. A man of the world. A man. She was very glad indeed she had not written to Kate the other day. What did she want with Kate? She had found a better companion.

But this was so much better, this way of Mr. Wilkins. Really a very impressive guy. There’s nothing like having a smart, not too young man for enjoyable and rewarding company. When she got up, having settled the business for which she had come, and said she was going to take a little stroll before lunch, Mr. Wilkins didn’t stick around with Lady Caroline, as most of the men she’d known probably would have wanted to—he asked if he could join her for a walk; it was clear he preferred conversation to just being around. A sensible, easy-going guy. A smart, well-read guy. A worldly man. A man. She was really glad she hadn’t written to Kate the other day. What did she need Kate for? She had found a better companion.

But Mr. Wilkins did not go with Mrs. Fisher because of her conversation, but because, when she got up and he got up because she got up, intending merely to bow her out of the recess, Lady Caroline had put her feet up on the parapet again, and arranging her head sideways in the cushions had shut her eyes.

But Mr. Wilkins didn't leave with Mrs. Fisher because of her chat; rather, he stood up when she did just to see her out of the recess. However, when Lady Caroline propped her feet up on the parapet again and tilted her head to the side on the cushions, she closed her eyes.

The daughter of the Droitwiches desired to go to sleep.

The daughter of the Droitwiches wanted to go to bed.

It was not for him, by remaining, to prevent her.

It wasn't his place to stop her from staying.

Chapter 16

And so the second week began, and all was harmony. The arrival of Mr. Wilkins, instead of, as three of the party had feared and the fourth had only been protected from fearing by her burning faith in the effect on him of San Salvatore, disturbing such harmony as there was, increased it. He fitted in. He was determined to please, and he did please. He was most amiable to his wife—not only in public, which she was used to, but in private, when he certainly wouldn’t have been if he hadn’t wanted to. He did want to. He was so much obliged to her, so much pleased with her, for making him acquainted with Lady Caroline, that he felt really fond of her. Also proud; for there must be, he reflected, a good deal more in her than he had supposed, for Lady Caroline to have become so intimate with her and so affectionate. And the more he treated her as though she were really very nice, the more Lotty expanded and became really very nice, and the more he, affected in his turn, became really very nice himself; so that they went round and round, not in a vicious but in a highly virtuous circle.

And so the second week started, and everything was peaceful. The arrival of Mr. Wilkins, instead of causing the disruption that three of the group had worried about and the fourth had only avoided fearing due to her strong belief in the positive impact of San Salvatore on him, actually enhanced the peace. He blended right in. He was eager to make a good impression, and he did. He was very friendly to his wife—not just in public, which she was used to, but also in private, when he definitely wouldn’t have been if he hadn’t wanted to be. He genuinely wanted to. He felt so grateful to her and so pleased with her for introducing him to Lady Caroline that he really grew fond of her. He also felt proud; because he thought there must be much more to her than he had realized if Lady Caroline had become so close and affectionate with her. The more he treated her as if she were genuinely nice, the more Lotty opened up and truly became very nice, and in turn, the more he was influenced and became really nice himself; so they kept uplifting each other, not in a negative way but in a highly positive cycle.

Positively, for him, Mellersh petted her. There was at no time much pet in Mellersh, because he was by nature a cool man; yet such was the influence on him of, as Lotty supposed, San Salvatore, that in this second week he sometimes pinched both her ears, one after the other, instead of only one; and Lotty, marvelling at such rapidly developing affectionateness, wondered what he would do, should he continue at this rate, in the third week, when her supply of ears would have come to an end.

Positively, Mellersh petted her. He wasn’t naturally an affectionate guy, but there was something about San Salvatore that seemed to influence him. By the second week, he sometimes pinched both her ears, one after the other, instead of just one. Lotty, surprised by his quickly growing affection, wondered what he would do if he kept it up in the third week when she would run out of ears.

He was particularly nice about the washstand, and genuinely desirous of not taking up too much of the space in the small bedroom. Quick to respond, Lotty was even more desirous not to be in his way; and the room became the scene of many an affectionate combat de générosité, each of which left them more pleased with each other than ever. He did not again have a bath in the bathroom, though it was mended and ready for him, but got up and went down every morning to the sea, and in spite of the cool nights making the water cold early had his dip as a man should, and came up to breakfast rubbing his hands and feeling, as he told Mrs. Fisher, prepared for anything.

He was especially considerate about the washstand and genuinely wanted to avoid taking up too much space in the small bedroom. Quick to respond, Lotty was even more eager not to be in his way, and the room became the setting for many a friendly struggle over who was being more generous, each of which left them feeling happier with each other than ever. He didn't take a bath in the bathroom again, even though it was fixed and ready for him; instead, he got up and went down to the sea every morning. Despite the chilly nights making the water cold early, he took his dip like a man should and came up to breakfast, rubbing his hands and feeling, as he told Mrs. Fisher, ready for anything.

Lotty’s belief in the irresistible influence of the heavenly atmosphere of San Salvatore being thus obviously justified, and Mr. Wilkins, whom Rose knew as alarming and Scrap had pictured as icily unkind, being so evidently a changed man, both Rose and Scrap began to think there might after all be something in what Lotty insisted on, and that San Salvatore did work purgingly on the character.

Lotty's faith in the undeniable magic of the heavenly vibe at San Salvatore was clearly supported, and Mr. Wilkins, who Rose thought was intimidating and Scrap had imagined as coldly cruel, was obviously a different person now. This led both Rose and Scrap to consider that maybe Lotty was onto something, and that San Salvatore really did have a way of cleansing one's character.

They were the more inclined to think so in that they too felt a working going on inside themselves: they felt more cleared, both of them, that second week—Scrap in her thoughts, many of which were now quite nice thoughts, real amiable ones about her parents and relations, with a glimmer in them of recognition of the extraordinary benefits she had received at the hands of—what? Fate? Providence?—anyhow of something, and of how, having received them, she had misused them by failing to be happy; and Rose in her bosom, which though it still yearned, yearned to some purpose, for she was reaching the conclusion that merely inactively to yearn was no use at all, and that she must either by some means stop her yearning or give it at least a chance—remote, but still a chance—of being quieted by writing to Frederick and asking him to come out.

They were more inclined to think so because they both felt something shifting inside them: they both felt clearer during that second week—Scrap with her thoughts, many of which were now quite nice, genuinely warm feelings about her parents and relatives, and a glimmer of recognition of the incredible benefits she had received from—what? Fate? Providence?—whatever it was, and of how, having received them, she had misused them by not being happy. And Rose in her heart, which still yearned, now yearned with purpose, as she was reaching the conclusion that just passively yearning was pointless, and that she needed to either find a way to stop her yearning or at least give it a shot—remote, but still a shot—at being quieted by writing to Frederick and asking him to come out.

If Mr. Wilkins could be changed, thought Rose, why not Frederick? How wonderful it would be, how too wonderful, if the place worked on him too and were able to make them even a little understand each other, even a little be friends. Rose, so far had loosening and disintegration gone on in her character, now was beginning to think her obstinate strait-lacedness about his books and her austere absorption in good works had been foolish and perhaps even wrong. He was her husband, and she had frightened him away. She had frightened love away, precious love, and that couldn’t be good. Was not Lotty right when she said the other day that nothing at all except love mattered? Nothing certainly seemed much use unless it was built up on love. But once frightened away, could it ever come back? Yes, it might in that beauty, it might in the atmosphere of happiness Lotty and San Salvatore seemed between them to spread round like some divine infection.

If Mr. Wilkins could change, Rose thought, why not Frederick? How amazing would it be, how incredibly amazing, if the place had the same effect on him and helped them even slightly understand each other, even a little become friends? Rose, who had experienced so much loosening and disintegration in her character, was starting to realize that her stubborn strictness about his books and her rigid focus on good works might have been foolish and maybe even wrong. He was her husband, and she had pushed him away. She had scared love away, precious love, and that couldn't be a good thing. Wasn't Lotty right when she said the other day that nothing else really mattered except love? Nothing seemed useful unless it was built on love. But once scared away, could love ever come back? Yes, it might, in that beauty, it might in the atmosphere of happiness Lotty and San Salvatore seemed to create together like some kind of divine infection.

She had, however, to get him there first, and he certainly couldn’t be got there if she didn’t write and tell him where she was.

She still needed to get him there first, and he definitely wouldn’t know how to get there if she didn’t write and let him know where she was.

She would write. She must write; for if she did there was at least a chance of his coming, and if she didn’t there was manifestly none. And then, once here in this loveliness, with everything so soft and kind and sweet all round, it would be easier to tell him, to try and explain, to ask for something different, for at least an attempt at something different in their lives in the future, instead of the blankness of separation, the cold—oh, the cold—of nothing at all but the great windiness of faith, the great bleakness of works. Why, one person in the world, one single person belonging to one, of one’s very own, to talk to, to take care of, to love, to be interested in, was worth more than all the speeches on platforms and the compliments of chairmen in the world. It was also worth more—Rose couldn’t help it, the thought would come—than all the prayers.

She would write. She had to write; because if she did, there was at least a chance he would come, and if she didn’t, there was clearly none. And then, once he was here in this beautiful place, with everything so soft and kind and sweet all around, it would be easier to tell him, to try and explain, to ask for something different, at least to attempt to create something new in their lives moving forward, instead of the emptiness of separation, the cold—oh, the cold—of having nothing at all but the vast emptiness of faith, the stark bleakness of actions. Why, just having one person in the world, one single person who belonged to her, to truly call her own, to talk to, to care for, to love, to be interested in, was worth so much more than all the speeches on platforms and the compliments from chairmen in the world. It was also worth more—Rose couldn’t help it; the thought would cross her mind—than all the prayers.

These thoughts were not head thoughts, like Scrap’s, who was altogether free from yearnings, but bosom thoughts. They lodged in the bosom; it was in the bosom that Rose ached, and felt so dreadfully lonely. And when her courage failed her, as it did on most days, and it seemed impossible to write to Frederick, she would look at Mr. Wilkins and revive.

These thoughts weren't thoughts in her head, like Scrap’s, who felt no longings at all, but feelings in her heart. They settled in her heart; it was in her heart that Rose felt pain and overwhelming loneliness. And when her courage gave out, which it often did, making it seem impossible to write to Frederick, she'd look at Mr. Wilkins and find her strength again.

There he was, a changed man. There he was, going into that small, uncomfortable room every night, that room whose proximities had been Lotty’s only misgiving, and coming out of it in the morning, and Lotty coming out of it too, both of them as unclouded and as nice to each other as when they went in. And hadn’t he, so critical at home, Lotty had told her, of the least thing going wrong, emerged from the bath catastrophe as untouched in spirit as Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego were untouched in body when they emerged from the fire? Miracles were happening in this place. If they could happen to Mr. Wilkins, why not to Frederick?

There he was, a different man. There he was, going into that small, uncomfortable room every night, the room that had been Lotty’s only concern, and coming out of it in the morning, with Lotty coming out too, both of them as clear-headed and nice to each other as when they went in. And hadn’t he, so critical at home, as Lotty had told her, of the slightest thing going wrong, come out of the bath disaster as unaffected in spirit as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego were untouched in body when they walked out of the fire? Miracles were happening in this place. If they could happen to Mr. Wilkins, why not to Frederick?

She got up quickly. Yes, she would write. She would go and write to him at once.

She got up quickly. Yes, she would write. She would go and write to him right away.

But suppose—

But let’s say—

She paused. Suppose he didn’t answer. Suppose he didn’t even answer.

She paused. What if he didn’t answer? What if he didn’t respond at all?

And she sat down again to think a little longer.

And she sat down again to think a little longer.

In these hesitations did Rose spend most of the second week.

In these uncertainties, Rose spent most of the second week.

Then there was Mrs. Fisher. Her restlessness increased that second week. It increased to such an extent that she might just as well not have had her private sitting-room at all, for she could no longer sit. Not for ten minutes together could Mrs. Fisher sit. And added to the restlessness, as the days of the second week proceeded on their way, she had a curious sensation, which worried her, of rising sap. She knew the feeling, because she had sometimes had it in childhood in specially swift springs, when the lilacs and the syringas seemed to rush out into blossom in a single night, but it was strange to have it again after over fifty years. She would have liked to remark on the sensation to some one, but she was ashamed. It was such an absurd sensation at her age. Yet oftener and oftener, and every day more and more, did Mrs. Fisher have a ridiculous feeling as if she were presently going to burgeon.

Then there was Mrs. Fisher. Her restlessness grew stronger that second week. It got to the point where she might as well not have had her own sitting room at all, because she couldn’t sit still. Not for more than ten minutes could Mrs. Fisher stay seated. Along with her restlessness, as the days of the second week went by, she felt a strange sensation of rising energy, which troubled her. She recognized the feeling since she had experienced it in childhood during particularly quick springs, when the lilacs and syringas seemed to burst into bloom overnight, but it was odd to feel it again after more than fifty years. She wanted to mention the sensation to someone, but she felt embarrassed. It felt so ridiculous at her age. Yet, more and more often, she had a silly feeling that she was about to bloom.

Sternly she tried to frown the unseemly sensation down. Burgeon, indeed. She had heard of dried staffs, pieces of mere dead wood, suddenly putting forth fresh leaves, but only in legend. She was not in legend. She knew perfectly what was due to herself. Dignity demanded that she should have nothing to do with fresh leaves at her age; and yet there it was—the feeling that presently, that at any moment now, she might crop out all green.

Sternly, she tried to push the inappropriate feeling away. It was growing, for sure. She had heard of dried branches, just dead wood, suddenly sprouting fresh leaves, but only in stories. She wasn’t in a story. She knew exactly what was expected of her. Dignity insisted that she shouldn't have anything to do with new beginnings at her age; and yet there it was—the feeling that any moment now, she might burst out with all this new growth.

Mrs. Fisher was upset. There were many things she disliked more than anything else, and one was when the elderly imagined they felt young and behaved accordingly. Of course they only imagined it, they were only deceiving themselves; but how deplorable were the results. She herself had grown old as people should grow old—steadily and firmly. No interruptions, no belated after-glows and spasmodic returns. If, after all these years, she were now going to be deluded into some sort of unsuitable breaking-out, how humiliating.

Mrs. Fisher was upset. There were a lot of things she disliked more than anything else, and one was when older people thought they felt young and acted like it. Of course, they were just fooling themselves; but how sad the outcomes were. She had aged the way people should—steadily and gracefully. No interruptions, no late-in-life bursts of energy and sudden awakenings. If, after all these years, she was now going to be tricked into some kind of inappropriate outburst, how embarrassing.

Indeed she was thankful, that second week, that Kate Lumley was not there. It would be most unpleasant, should anything different occur in her behaviour, to have Kate looking on. Kate had known her all her life. She felt she could let herself go—here Mrs. Fisher frowned at the book she was vainly trying to concentrate on, for where did that expression come from?—much less painfully before strangers than before an old friend. Old friends, reflected Mrs. Fisher, who hoped she was reading, compare one constantly with what one used to be. They are always doing it if one develops. They are surprised at development. They hark back; they expect motionlessness after, say, fifty, to the end of one’s days.

Indeed, she was grateful, during that second week, that Kate Lumley wasn't around. It would be really uncomfortable if anything changed in her behavior with Kate watching. Kate had known her her entire life. She felt she could relax—here Mrs. Fisher frowned at the book she was struggling to focus on, wondering where that expression came from—much more easily in front of strangers than in front of an old friend. Old friends, Mrs. Fisher thought, hoping she was still reading, constantly compare you to who you used to be. They always do it when you grow and change. They're caught off guard by your development. They dwell on the past; they expect you to stay the same after, say, fifty, for the rest of your life.

That, thought Mrs. Fisher, her eyes going steadily line by line down the page and not a word of it getting through into her consciousness, is foolish of friends. It is condemning one to a premature death. One should continue (of course with dignity) to develop, however old one may be. She had nothing against developing, against further ripeness, because as long as one was alive one was not dead—obviously, decided Mrs. Fisher, and development, change, ripening, were life. What she would dislike would be unripening, going back to something green. She would dislike it intensely; and this is what she felt she was on the brink of doing.

That, Mrs. Fisher thought, her eyes slowly moving down the page without really absorbing any of it, is foolish of friends. It’s like condemning someone to an early death. One should keep evolving (of course with dignity), no matter how old they are. She didn't have anything against growing, against maturing, because as long as someone is alive, they aren’t dead—obviously, Mrs. Fisher decided, and growth, change, and maturing are all part of life. What she would dislike is regressing, going back to something unripe. She would hate that intensely; and this is how she felt she was about to act.

Naturally it made her very uneasy, and only in constant movement could she find distraction. Increasingly restless and no longer able to confine herself to her battlements, she wandered more and more frequently, and also aimlessly, in and out of the top garden, to the growing surprise of Scrap, especially when she found that all Mrs. Fisher did was to stare for a few minutes at the view, pick a few dead leaves off the rose-bushes, and go away again.

Naturally, this made her really uneasy, and she could only find distraction through constant movement. Growing more restless and unable to stay in one place, she wandered more frequently and aimlessly in and out of the top garden, much to Scrap's growing surprise, especially when she realized that all Mrs. Fisher did was stare at the view for a few minutes, pick a few dead leaves off the rose bushes, and leave again.

In Mr. Wilkins’s conversation she found temporary relief, but though he joined her whenever he could he was not always there, for he spread his attentions judiciously among the three ladies, and when he was somewhere else she had to face and manage her thoughts as best she could by herself. Perhaps it was the excess of light and colour at San Salvatore which made every other place seem dark and black; and Prince of Wales Terrace did seem a very dark black spot to have to go back to—a dark, narrow street, and her house dark and narrow as the street, with nothing really living or young in it. The goldfish could hardly be called living, or at most not more than half living, and were certainly not young, and except for them there were only the maids, and they were dusty old things.

In Mr. Wilkins’s conversations, she found a bit of comfort, but even though he joined her whenever he could, he wasn’t always around. He spread his attention wisely among the three ladies, and when he was off elsewhere, she had to deal with her thoughts on her own as best she could. Maybe it was the overwhelming light and color at San Salvatore that made every other place feel dark and dull; and Prince of Wales Terrace certainly felt like a very dark spot to return to—a gloomy, narrow street, with her house just as dark and narrow as the street, lacking anything truly vibrant or youthful. The goldfish hardly counted as living, or at most were only half alive, and definitely not young. Besides them, there were just the maids, who were dusty old things.

Dusty old things. Mrs. Fisher paused in her thoughts, arrested by the strange expression. Where had it come from? How was it possible for it to come at all? It might have been one of Mrs. Wilkins’s, in its levity, its almost slang. Perhaps it was one of hers, and she had heard her say it and unconsciously caught it from her.

Dusty old stuff. Mrs. Fisher paused in her thoughts, taken aback by the strange expression. Where did it come from? How could it even exist at all? It could have been one of Mrs. Wilkins’s phrases, with its lightness and almost slangy feel. Maybe it was one of hers, and she had heard her say it and unknowingly picked it up from her.

If so, this was both serious and disgusting. That the foolish creature should penetrate into Mrs. Fisher’s very mind and establish her personality there, the personality which was still, in spite of the harmony apparently existing between her and her intelligent husband, so alien to Mrs. Fisher’s own, so far removed from what she understood and liked, and infect her with her undesirable phrases, was most disturbing. Never in her life before had such a sentence come into Mrs. Fisher’s head. Never in her life before had she thought of her maids, or of anybody else, as dusty old things. Her maids were not dusty old things; they were most respectable, neat women, who were allowed the use of the bathroom every Saturday night. Elderly, certainly, but then so was she, so was her house, so was her furniture, so were her goldfish. They were all elderly, as they should be, together. But there was a great difference between being elderly and being a dusty old thing.

If that’s the case, it was both serious and disturbing. The idea that this foolish person could invade Mrs. Fisher’s mind and impose her personality there, a personality that, despite the apparent harmony with her smart husband, was so foreign to Mrs. Fisher’s own, so far from what she understood and liked, and infect her with her unwanted phrases, was unsettling. Never before had such a thought crossed Mrs. Fisher’s mind. She had never seen her maids or anyone else as dusty old things. Her maids weren’t dusty old things; they were respectable, tidy women who got to use the bathroom every Saturday night. Sure, they were older, but so was she, so was her house, so was her furniture, and so were her goldfish. They were all older, as they should be, together. But there was a significant difference between being elderly and being a dusty old thing.

How true it was what Ruskin said, that evil communications corrupt good manners. But did Ruskin say it? On second thoughts she was not sure, but it was just the sort of thing he would have said if he had said it, and in any case it was true. Merely hearing Mrs. Wilkins’s evil communications at meals—she did not listen, she avoided listening, yet it was evident she had heard—those communications which, in that they so often were at once vulgar, indelicate and profane, and always, she was sorry to say, laughed at by Lady Caroline, must be classed as evil, was spoiling her own mental manners. Soon she might not only think but say. How terrible that would be. If that were the form her breaking-out was going to take, the form of unseemly speech, Mrs. Fisher was afraid she would hardly with any degree of composure be able to bear it.

How true it was when Ruskin said that bad influences ruin good behavior. But did Ruskin actually say that? On second thought, she wasn’t sure, but it was exactly the kind of thing he would have said if he had said it, and anyway, it was true. Just hearing Mrs. Wilkins’s negative talk at meals—she didn’t listen, she tried not to listen, yet it was clear she had heard—those conversations which were often vulgar, inappropriate, and profane, and always, unfortunately, laughed at by Lady Caroline, had to be considered bad, and they were ruining her own mental manners. Soon she might not only think but actually say those things. How awful that would be. If that's how her breaking out was going to manifest, in the form of inappropriate speech, Mrs. Fisher was afraid she wouldn’t be able to handle it calmly at all.

At this stage Mrs. Fisher wished more than ever that she were able to talk over her strange feelings with some one who would understand. There was, however, no one who would understand except Mrs. Wilkins herself. She would. She would know at once, Mrs. Fisher was sure, what she felt like. But this was impossible. It would be as abject as begging the very microbe that was infecting one for protection against its disease.

At this point, Mrs. Fisher wished more than ever that she could discuss her strange feelings with someone who would understand. Unfortunately, there was no one who could except Mrs. Wilkins herself. She would get it. Mrs. Fisher was sure that she would instantly understand what she was experiencing. But that was out of the question. It would be as desperate as asking the very microbe causing an infection to protect you from its disease.

She continued, accordingly, to bear her sensations in silence, and was driven by them into that frequent aimless appearing in the top garden which presently roused even Scrap’s attention.

She kept her feelings to herself and often wandered into the top garden, which eventually caught Scrap's attention.

Scrap had noticed it, and vaguely wondered at it, for some time before Mr. Wilkins inquired of her one morning as he arranged her cushions for her—he had established the daily assisting of Lady Caroline into her chair as his special privilege—whether there was anything the matter with Mrs. Fisher.

Scrap had noticed it and wondered about it for a while before Mr. Wilkins asked her one morning, as he arranged her cushions—he had made it his daily duty to help Lady Caroline into her chair—if something was wrong with Mrs. Fisher.

At that moment Mrs. Fisher was standing by the eastern parapet, shading her eyes and carefully scrutinising the distant white houses of Mezzago. They could see her through the branches of the daphnes.

At that moment, Mrs. Fisher was standing by the eastern parapet, shielding her eyes and carefully examining the distant white houses of Mezzago. They could see her through the branches of the daphnes.

“I don’t know,” said Scrap.

“I don’t know,” Scrap said.

“She is a lady, I take it,” said Mr. Wilkins, “who would be unlikely to have anything on her mind?”

“She seems like a lady,” Mr. Wilkins said, “who probably doesn't have anything weighing on her mind?”

“I should imagine so,” said Scrap, smiling.

“I guess so,” said Scrap, smiling.

“If she has, and her restlessness appears to suggest it, I should be more than glad to assist her with advice.”

“If she has, and her restlessness seems to indicate it, I would be more than happy to help her with advice.”

“I am sure you would be most kind.”

“I’m sure you’d be really nice.”

“Of course she has her own legal adviser, but he is not on the spot. I am. And a lawyer on the spot,” said Mr. Wilkins, who endeavoured to make his conversation when he talked to Lady Caroline light, aware that one must be light with young ladies, “is worth two in—we won’t be ordinary and complete the proverb, but say London.”

“Of course she has her own legal advisor, but he’s not here. I am. And a lawyer who’s here,” said Mr. Wilkins, trying to keep his conversation light when talking to Lady Caroline, knowing that one must be easygoing with young ladies, “is worth two in—we won’t be typical and finish the saying, but let’s just say London.”

“You should ask her.”

"Ask her."

“Ask her if she needs assistance? Would you advise it? Would it not be a little—a little delicate to touch on such a question, the question whether or no a lady has something on her mind?”

“Ask her if she needs help? Would you recommend it? Wouldn’t it be a bit—kind of sensitive to bring up such a question, the question of whether a lady has something on her mind?”

“Perhaps she will tell you if you go and talk to her. I think it must be lonely to be Mrs. Fisher.”

“Maybe she’ll share with you if you go and talk to her. I bet it’s lonely being Mrs. Fisher.”

“You are all thoughtfulness and consideration,” declared Mr. Wilkins, wishing, for the first time in his life, that he were a foreigner so that he might respectfully kiss her hand on withdrawing to go obediently and relieve Mrs. Fisher’s loneliness.

“You're so thoughtful and considerate,” Mr. Wilkins said, wishing for the first time in his life that he were a foreigner so he could respectfully kiss her hand as he left to go obediently and ease Mrs. Fisher’s loneliness.

It was wonderful what a variety of exits from her corner Scrap contrived for Mr. Wilkins. Each morning she found a different one, which sent him off pleased after he had arranged her cushions for her. She allowed him to arrange the cushions because she instantly had discovered, the very first five minutes of the very first evening, that her fears lest he should cling to her and stare in dreadful admiration were baseless. Mr. Wilkins did not admire like that. It was not only, she instinctively felt, not in him, but if it had been he would not have dared to in her case. He was all respectfulness. She could direct his movements in regard to herself with the raising of an eyelash. His one concern was to obey. She had been prepared to like him if he would only be so obliging as not to admire her, and she did like him. She did not forget his moving defencelessness the first morning in his towel, and he amused her, and he was kind to Lotty. It is true she liked him most when he wasn’t there, but then she usually liked everybody most when they weren’t there. Certainly he did seem to be one of those men, rare in her experience, who never looked at a woman from the predatory angle. The comfort of this, the simplification it brought into the relations of the party, was immense. From this point of view Mr. Wilkins was simply ideal; he was unique and precious. Whenever she thought of him, and was perhaps inclined to dwell on the aspects of him that were a little boring, she remembered this and murmured, “But what a treasure.”

It was amazing how many different ways Scrap found to send Mr. Wilkins off from her corner. Each morning, she discovered a new way that left him happy after he had arranged her cushions. She let him do that because she quickly realized, within the first five minutes of their first evening together, that her concerns about him getting too attached and staring at her in an awkward way were unfounded. Mr. Wilkins didn’t admire her like that. She instinctively sensed that he simply didn’t have that in him, and even if he did, he wouldn’t dare do it around her. He was all about respect. She could guide his actions around her with just a flick of an eyelash. His main focus was on pleasing her. She had been ready to appreciate him if he would just refrain from admiring her, and she did end up liking him. She didn’t forget how vulnerable he seemed that first morning in just his towel, and he made her laugh, plus he was nice to Lotty. It’s true she liked him best when he wasn’t around, but she generally liked everyone more when they weren’t there. Definitely, he seemed to be one of those rare men in her experience who never looked at a woman with a predatory eye. The comfort this brought, and how it simplified the group dynamics, was huge. From this perspective, Mr. Wilkins was simply perfect; he was one of a kind and valuable. Whenever she thought of him and maybe started to focus on some of his slightly dull traits, she would remind herself, “But what a treasure.”

Indeed it was Mr. Wilkins’s one aim during his stay at San Salvatore to be a treasure. At all costs the three ladies who were not his wife must like him and trust him. Then presently when trouble arose in their lives—and in what lives did not trouble sooner or later arise?—they would recollect how reliable he was and how sympathetic, and turn to him for advice. Ladies with something on their minds were exactly what he wanted. Lady Caroline, he judged, had nothing on hers at the moment, but so much beauty—for he could not but see what was evident—must have had its difficulties in the past and would have more of them before it had done. In the past he had not been at hand; in the future he hoped to be. And meanwhile the behaviour of Mrs. Fisher, the next in importance of the ladies from the professional point of view, showed definite promise. It was almost certain that Mrs. Fisher had something on her mind. He had been observing her attentively, and it was almost certain.

Indeed, Mr. Wilkins's main goal during his time at San Salvatore was to be a valuable resource. Above all, he wanted the three ladies who weren't his wife to like and trust him. Then, when issues inevitably came up in their lives—and whose life doesn’t have trouble sooner or later?—they would remember how dependable and understanding he was and would seek his advice. He was specifically looking for ladies with something on their minds. Lady Caroline, he guessed, didn’t have anything bothering her at the moment, but with that much beauty—he couldn’t help but notice the obvious—she must have faced challenges in the past and would likely encounter more in the future. He hadn’t been around to help before, but he hoped to be there for her going forward. Meanwhile, Mrs. Fisher, the next most important lady from a professional standpoint, showed clear promise. It seemed almost certain that she had something weighing on her. He had been watching her closely, and it was almost a certainty.

With the third, with Mrs. Arbuthnot, he had up to this made least headway, for she was so very retiring and quiet. But might not this very retiringness, this tendency to avoid the others and spend her time alone, indicate that she too was troubled? If so, he was her man. He would cultivate her. He would follow her and sit with her, and encourage her to tell him about herself. Arbuthnot, he understood from Lotty, was a British Museum official—nothing specially important at present, but Mr. Wilkins regarded it as his business to know all sorts and kinds. Besides, there was promotion. Arbuthnot, promoted, might become very much worth while.

Up until now, he had made the least progress with Mrs. Arbuthnot because she was so shy and quiet. But could her shyness, her tendency to keep to herself and spend time alone, mean that she also had her own struggles? If that was the case, he was the one for her. He would get to know her better. He would follow her, sit with her, and encourage her to open up about her life. From Lotty, he learned that Arbuthnot worked at the British Museum—nothing too significant at the moment, but Mr. Wilkins thought it was important to know all kinds of details. Plus, there was the possibility of promotion. If Arbuthnot got promoted, he could become quite valuable.

As for Lotty, she was charming. She really had all the qualities he had credited her with during his courtship, and they had been, it appeared, merely in abeyance since. His early impressions of her were now being endorsed by the affection and even admiration Lady Caroline showed for her. Lady Caroline Dester was the last person, he was sure, to be mistaken on such a subject. Her knowledge of the world, her constant association with only the best, must make her quite unerring. Lotty was evidently, then, that which before marriage he had believed her to be—she was valuable. She certainly had been most valuable in introducing him to Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher. A man in his profession could be immensely helped by a clever and attractive wife. Why had she not been attractive sooner? Why this sudden flowering?

Lotty was absolutely charming. She really had all the qualities he had seen in her during their courtship, and it seemed like those qualities had just been on hold until now. His initial impressions of her were being confirmed by the affection and even admiration Lady Caroline had for her. He was sure that Lady Caroline Dester was the last person to make a mistake about someone like Lotty. Her knowledge of the world and her constant association with only the best people made her judgment reliable. It was clear that Lotty was exactly what he had believed her to be before they got married—she was worth a lot. She had definitely been incredibly valuable in introducing him to Lady Caroline and Mrs. Fisher. A man in his field could gain so much from having a smart and attractive wife. Why hadn’t she been attractive before? What caused this sudden transformation?

Mr. Wilkins began too to believe there was something peculiar, as Lotty had almost at once informed him, in the atmosphere of San Salvatore. It promoted expansion. It brought out dormant qualities. And feeling more and more pleased, and even charmed, by his wife, and very content with the progress he was making with the two others, and hopeful of progress to be made with the retiring third, Mr. Wilkins could not remember ever having had such an agreeable holiday. The only thing that might perhaps be bettered was the way they would call him Mr. Wilkins. Nobody said Mr. Mellersh-Wilkins. Yet he had introduced himself to Lady Caroline—he flinched a little on remembering the circumstances—as Mellersh-Wilkins.

Mr. Wilkins also started to believe there was something unusual, as Lotty had quickly pointed out, about the atmosphere of San Salvatore. It encouraged openness. It revealed hidden talents. And feeling increasingly pleased, even enchanted, by his wife, and very satisfied with the progress he was making with the two others, and hopeful about making progress with the shy third, Mr. Wilkins couldn’t recall ever having such an enjoyable vacation. The only thing that could perhaps be improved was how they called him Mr. Wilkins. Nobody referred to him as Mr. Mellersh-Wilkins. Still, he had introduced himself to Lady Caroline—he cringed a bit at remembering how— as Mellersh-Wilkins.

Still, this was a small matter, not enough to worry about. He would be foolish if in such a place and such society he worried about anything. He was not even worrying about what the holiday was costing, and had made up his mind to pay not only his own expenses but his wife’s as well, and surprise her at the end by presenting her with her nest-egg as intact as when she started; and just the knowledge that he was preparing a happy surprise for her made him feel warmer than ever towards her.

Still, this was a minor issue, not worth stressing over. He would be silly to worry about anything in a place like this surrounded by such company. He wasn’t even concerned about the cost of the holiday and had decided to cover not just his expenses but his wife's too, planning to surprise her at the end by giving her back her savings just as they were when she started; and just knowing he was preparing a delightful surprise for her made him feel even more affectionate toward her.

In fact Mr. Wilkins, who had begun by being consciously and according to plan on his best behaviour, remained on it unconsciously, and with no effort at all.

In fact, Mr. Wilkins, who had started out trying to be on his best behavior intentionally and according to a plan, ended up being that way effortlessly and without even realizing it.

And meanwhile the beautiful golden days were dropping gently from the second week one by one, equal in beauty with those of the first, and the scent of beanfields in flower on the hillside behind the village came across to San Salvatore whenever the air moved. In the garden that second week the poet’s eyed narcissus disappeared out the long grass at the edge of the zigzag path, and wild gladiolus, slender and rose-coloured, came in their stead, white pinks bloomed in the borders, filling the whole place with their smoky-sweet smell, and a bush nobody had noticed burst into glory and fragrance, and it was a purple lilac bush. Such a jumble of spring and summer was not to be believed in, except by those who dwelt in those gardens. Everything seemed to be out together—all the things crowded into one month which in England are spread penuriously over six. Even primroses were found one day by Mrs. Wilkins in a cold corner up in the hills; and when she brought them down to the geraniums and heliotrope of San Salvatore they looked quite shy.

And in the meantime, the beautiful golden days were gently passing from the second week, one by one, just as lovely as those of the first, and the scent of flowering bean fields on the hillside behind the village drifted over to San Salvatore whenever the wind blew. In the garden that second week, the poet's admired narcissus faded away in the long grass at the edge of the winding path, and wild gladiolus, slender and pink, took their place. White pinks bloomed in the borders, filling the entire area with their smoky-sweet fragrance, and a bush that nobody had noticed burst into vibrant color and scent—it was a purple lilac bush. Such a mix of spring and summer was hard to believe, except for those who lived in those gardens. Everything seemed to be happening all at once—all the things that are usually stretched out over six months in England were crammed into one. Even primroses were discovered one day by Mrs. Wilkins in a chilly spot up in the hills, and when she brought them down to the geraniums and heliotrope of San Salvatore, they looked quite shy.

Chapter 17

On the first day of the third week Rose wrote to Frederick.

On the first day of the third week, Rose wrote to Frederick.

In case she should again hesitate and not post the letter, she gave it to Domenico to post; for if she did not write now there would be no time left at all. Half the month at San Salvatore was over. Even if Frederick started directly he got the letter, which of course he wouldn’t be able to do, what with packing and passport, besides not being in a hurry to come, he couldn’t arrive for five days.

In case she hesitated again and didn’t mail the letter, she gave it to Domenico to send; because if she didn’t write it now, there wouldn’t be any time left. Half of the month at San Salvatore was gone. Even if Frederick left immediately after getting the letter, which he obviously wouldn’t be able to do because of packing and getting his passport, and also not being in a rush to come, he still wouldn’t arrive for five days.

Having done it, Rose wished she hadn’t. He wouldn’t come. He wouldn’t bother to answer. And if he did answer, it would just be giving some reason which was not true, and about being too busy to get away; and all that had been got by writing to him would be that she would be more unhappy than before.

Having done it, Rose wished she hadn’t. He wouldn’t come. He wouldn’t bother to respond. And if he did respond, it would just be with some excuse that wasn’t true about being too busy to get away; and all that writing to him would accomplish would be making her feel more unhappy than before.

What things one did when one was idle. This resurrection of Frederick, or rather this attempt to resurrect him, what was it but the result of having nothing whatever to do? She wished she had never come away on a holiday. What did she want with holidays? Work was her salvation; work was the only thing that protected one, that kept one steady and one’s values true. At home in Hampstead, absorbed and busy, she had managed to get over Frederick, thinking of him latterly only with the gentle melancholy with which one thinks of some one once loved but long since dead; and now this place, idleness in this soft place, had thrown her back to the wretched state she had climbed so carefully out of years ago. Why, if Frederick did come she would only bore him. Hadn’t she seen in a flash quite soon after getting to San Salvatore that that was really what kept him away from her? And why should she suppose that now, after such a long estrangement, she would be able not to bore him, be able to do anything but stand before him like a tongue-tied idiot, with all the fingers of her spirit turned into thumbs? Besides, what a hopeless position, to have as it were to beseech: Please wait a little—please don’t be impatient—I think perhaps I shan’t be a bore presently.

What do people do when they're just sitting around? This attempt to bring Frederick back, what was it other than being completely bored? She wished she had never gone on this vacation. What did she need with holidays? Work was her salvation; it was the only thing that kept her grounded and her values in check. Back home in Hampstead, busy and focused, she had managed to get over Frederick, thinking of him lately only with that gentle sadness people feel for someone they once loved but who has long since passed; and now this place, this lazy atmosphere, had thrown her back into that awful state she'd carefully climbed out of years ago. If Frederick did come, she would just bore him. Hadn’t she realized shortly after arriving in San Salvatore that this was really what kept him away from her? And why would she think that now, after such a long separation, she'd be able to avoid boring him, that she'd be able to do anything other than stand in front of him like a mute fool, with all her spiritual energy turned to nothing? Besides, what a hopeless position to be in, having to plead: Please wait a little longer—please don’t be impatient—I think I might not be boring soon.

A thousand times a day Rose wished she had let Frederick alone. Lotty, who asked her every evening whether she had sent her letter yet, exclaimed with delight when the answer at last was yes, and threw her arms round her. “Now we shall be completely happy!” cried the enthusiastic Lotty.

A thousand times a day, Rose wished she had left Frederick alone. Lotty, who asked her every evening whether she had sent her letter yet, exclaimed with delight when the answer was finally yes and threw her arms around her. “Now we’ll be completely happy!” cried the enthusiastic Lotty.

But nothing seemed less certain to Rose, and her expression became more and more the expression of one who has something on her mind.

But nothing felt less certain to Rose, and her expression increasingly reflected that of someone who had something bothering her.

Mr. Wilkins, wanting to find out what it was, strolled in the sun in his Panama hat, and began to meet her accidentally.

Mr. Wilkins, curious to discover what it was, walked in the sun wearing his Panama hat and started to run into her by chance.

“I did not know,” said Mr. Wilkins the first time, courteously raising his hat, “that you too liked this particular spot.” And he sat down beside her.

“I had no idea,” said Mr. Wilkins, politely tipping his hat, “that you liked this spot too.” Then he sat down next to her.

In the afternoon she chose another spot; and she had not been in it half an hour before Mr. Wilkins, lightly swinging his cane, came round the corner.

In the afternoon, she picked another spot; and she hadn't been there for half an hour before Mr. Wilkins, casually swinging his cane, came around the corner.

“We are destined to meet in our rambles,” said Mr. Wilkins pleasantly. And he sat down beside her.

“We're meant to run into each other on our walks,” Mr. Wilkins said with a smile. Then he sat down next to her.

Mr. Wilkins was very kind, and she had, she saw, misjudged him in Hampstead, and this was the real man, ripened like fruit by the beneficent sun of San Salvatore, but Rose did want to be alone. Still, she was grateful to him for proving to her that though she might bore Frederick she did not bore everybody; if she had, he would not have sat talking to her on each occasion till it was time to go in. True he bored her, but that wasn’t anything like so dreadful as if she bored him. Then indeed her vanity would have been sadly ruffled. For now that Rose was not able to say her prayers she was being assailed by every sort of weakness: vanity, sensitiveness, irritability, pugnacity—strange, unfamiliar devils to have coming crowding on one and taking possession of one’s swept and empty heart. She had never been vain or irritable or pugnacious in her life before. Could it be that San Salvatore was capable of opposite effects, and the same sun that ripened Mr. Wilkins made her go acid?

Mr. Wilkins was really nice, and she realized she had misjudged him in Hampstead. This was the real man, matured like fruit under the nurturing sun of San Salvatore, but Rose wanted to be alone. Still, she appreciated him for showing her that while Frederick might find her boring, not everyone did; if she had been boring, he wouldn't have kept talking to her until it was time to go inside. True, he bored her, but that was nowhere near as upsetting as boring him would have been. That would have really hurt her pride. Now that Rose couldn’t say her prayers, she was being overwhelmed by all kinds of weaknesses: vanity, sensitivity, irritability, aggression—strange, unfamiliar feelings invading her once-clear heart. She had never been vain or irritable or combative before. Could it be that San Salvatore had the opposite effect on her, and the same sun that enriched Mr. Wilkins made her sour?

The next morning, so as to be sure of being alone, she went down, while Mr. Wilkins was still lingering pleasantly with Mrs. Fisher over breakfast, to the rocks by the water’s edge where she and Lotty had sat the first day. Frederick by now had got her letter. To-day, if he were like Mr. Wilkins, she might get a telegram from him.

The next morning, to make sure she was alone, she went down while Mr. Wilkins was still enjoying breakfast with Mrs. Fisher, to the rocks by the water’s edge where she and Lotty had sat on the first day. By now, Frederick had received her letter. Today, if he was anything like Mr. Wilkins, she might get a telegram from him.

She tried to silence the absurd hope by jeering at it. Yet—if Mr. Wilkins had telegraphed, why not Frederick? The spell of San Salvatore lurked even, it seemed, in notepaper. Lotty had not dreamed of getting a telegram, and when she came in at lunch-time there it was. It would be too wonderful if when she went back at lunch-time she found one there for her too. . .

She tried to quiet the ridiculous hope by mocking it. Yet—if Mr. Wilkins had sent a telegram, why not Frederick? The magic of San Salvatore seemed to linger even on the notepaper. Lotty hadn't expected to receive a telegram, and when she came in at lunchtime, there it was. It would be amazing if, when she returned at lunchtime, she found one waiting for her too...

Rose clasped her hands tight round her knees. How passionately she longed to be important to somebody again—not important on platforms, not important as an asset in an organisation, but privately important, just to one other person, quite privately, nobody else to know or notice. It didn’t seem much to ask in a world so crowded with people, just to have one of them, only one out of all the millions, to oneself. Somebody who needed one, who thought of one, who was eager to come to one—oh, oh how dreadfully one wanted to be precious!

Rose held her hands tightly around her knees. How deeply she longed to be significant to someone again—not in a public way, not as a valuable member of a team, but personally important, just to one other person, completely privately, with no one else knowing or noticing. It didn’t seem like too much to ask in a world filled with people, just to have one of them, only one out of all the millions, for herself. Someone who needed her, who thought of her, who was eager to come to her—oh, oh how desperately she wanted to be cherished!

All the morning she sat beneath the pine-tree by the sea. Nobody came near her. The great hours passed slowly; they seemed enormous. But she wouldn’t go up before lunch, she would give the telegram time to arrive. . .

All morning, she sat under the pine tree by the sea. Nobody came near her. The long hours dragged on; they felt endless. But she wasn’t going to go inside before lunch; she wanted to give the telegram time to arrive. . .

That day Scrap, egged on by Lotty’s persuasions and also thinking that perhaps she had sat long enough, had arisen from her chair and cushions and gone off with Lotty and sandwiches up into the hills till evening. Mr. Wilkins, who wished to go with them, stayed on Lady Caroline’s advice with Mrs. Fisher in order to cheer her solitude, and though he left off cheering her about eleven to go and look for Mrs. Arbuthnot, so as for a space to cheer her too, thus dividing himself impartially between these solitary ladies, he came back again presently mopping his forehead and continued with Mrs. Fisher where he had left off, for this time Mrs. Arbuthnot had hidden successfully. There was a telegram, too, for her he noticed when he came in. Pity he did not know where she was.

That day Scrap, encouraged by Lotty’s insistence and thinking she had lounged around long enough, got up from her chair and cushions and went off with Lotty and sandwiches into the hills until evening. Mr. Wilkins, who wanted to join them, stayed with Mrs. Fisher on Lady Caroline’s advice to keep her company, and although he stopped entertaining her around eleven to look for Mrs. Arbuthnot, hoping to cheer her up as well, he divided his time between these lonely ladies. He returned a little later, wiping his forehead, and resumed his conversation with Mrs. Fisher where he had left off because this time Mrs. Arbuthnot had successfully hidden. He also noticed there was a telegram for her when he walked in. Too bad he didn’t know where she was.

“Ought we to open it?” he said to Mrs. Fisher.

“Ought we to open it?” he asked Mrs. Fisher.

“No,” said Mrs. Fisher.

“No,” Mrs. Fisher said.

“It may require an answer.”

"It might need a response."

“I don’t approve of tampering with other people’s correspondence.”

"I don't think it's right to interfere with other people's mail."

“Tampering! My dear lady—”

"Tampering! My dear!"

Mr. Wilkins was shocked. Such a word. Tampering. He had the greatest possible esteem for Mrs. Fisher, but he did at times find her a little difficult. She liked him, he was sure, and she was in a fair way, he felt, to become a client, but he feared she would be a headstrong and secretive client. She was certainly secretive, for though he had been skilful and sympathetic for a whole week, she had as yet given him no inkling of what was so evidently worrying her.

Mr. Wilkins was taken aback. Such a word. Tampering. He held Mrs. Fisher in high regard, but at times he found her a bit challenging. He was sure she liked him, and he felt she was on her way to becoming a client, but he worried she would be a stubborn and secretive one. She was definitely secretive, because despite being skilled and understanding for an entire week, she still hadn’t given him any hint about what was clearly bothering her.

“Poor old thing,” said Lotty, on his asking her if she perhaps could throw light on Mrs. Fisher’s troubles. “She hasn’t got love.”

“Poor thing,” said Lotty, when he asked her if she could shed some light on Mrs. Fisher’s troubles. “She doesn’t have love.”

“Love?” Mr. Wilkins could only echo, genuinely scandalised. “But surely, my dear—at her age—”

“Love?” Mr. Wilkins could only echo, genuinely shocked. “But surely, my dear—at her age—”

Any love,” said Lotty.

“Any love,” said Lotty.

That very morning he had asked his wife, for he now sought and respected her opinion, if she could tell him what was the matter with Mrs. Arbuthnot, for she too, though he had done his best to thaw her into confidences, had remained persistently retiring.

That very morning he had asked his wife, since he now valued and respected her opinion, if she could tell him what was up with Mrs. Arbuthnot, because she too, even though he had tried his best to get her to open up, had stayed consistently withdrawn.

“She wants her husband,” said Lotty.

"She wants her husband," Lotty said.

“Ah,” said Mr. Wilkins, a new light shed on Mrs. Arbuthnot’s shy and modest melancholy. And he added, “Very proper.”

“Ah,” said Mr. Wilkins, a new light shed on Mrs. Arbuthnot’s shy and modest sadness. And he added, “Very appropriate.”

And Lotty said, smiling at him, “One does.”

And Lotty said, smiling at him, “One does.”

And Mr. Wilkins said, smiling at her, “Does one?”

And Mr. Wilkins said, smiling at her, “Does it?”

And Lotty said, smiling at him, “Of course.”

And Lotty said, smiling at him, “Of course.”

And Mr. Wilkins, much pleased with her, though it was still quite early in the day, a time when caresses are sluggish, pinched her ear.

And Mr. Wilkins, feeling quite pleased with her, even though it was still early in the day, a time when affection tends to be slow, pinched her ear.

Just before half-past twelve Rose came slowly up through the pergola and between the camellias ranged on either side of the old stone steps. The rivulets of periwinkles that flowed down them when first she arrived were gone, and now there were these bushes, incredibly rosetted. Pink, white, red, striped—she fingered and smelt them one after the other, so as not to get to her disappointment too quickly. As long as she hadn’t seen for herself, seen the table in the hall quite empty except for its bowl of flowers, she still could hope, she still could have the joy of imagining the telegram lying on it waiting for her. But there is no smell in a camellia, as Mr. Wilkins, who was standing in the doorway on the look-out for her and knew what was necessary in horticulture, reminded her.

Just before 12:30, Rose walked slowly through the pergola and between the camellias lined up on both sides of the old stone steps. The streams of periwinkles that had flowed down them when she first arrived were gone, and now there were these bushes, incredibly blooming. Pink, white, red, striped—she touched and smelled each one, trying to delay her disappointment. As long as she hadn’t seen for herself, seen the table in the hall completely empty except for its bowl of flowers, she could still hope; she could still enjoy imagining the telegram sitting there waiting for her. But there’s no scent to a camellia, as Mr. Wilkins, who was standing in the doorway watching for her and knew what was necessary in gardening, reminded her.

She started at his voice and looked up.

She jumped at his voice and looked up.

“A telegram has come for you,” said Mr. Wilkins.

“A telegram has arrived for you,” said Mr. Wilkins.

She stared at him, her mouth open.

She looked at him, her mouth hanging open.

“I searched for you everywhere, but failed—”

“I looked for you everywhere, but I couldn't find you—”

Of course. She knew it. She had been sure of it all the time. Bright and burning, Youth in that instant flashed down again on Rose. She flew up the steps, red as the camellia she had just been fingering, and was in the hall and tearing open the telegram before Mr. Wilkins had finished his sentence. Why, but if things could happen like this—why, but there was no end to—why, she and Frederick—they were going to be—again—at last—

Of course. She knew it. She had been sure of it all along. Bright and intense, Youth suddenly shone down on Rose again. She rushed up the steps, as flushed as the camellia she had just been touching, and was in the hall, ripping open the telegram before Mr. Wilkins could finish his sentence. Why, if things could happen like this—there was no limit to—why, she and Frederick—they were going to be—again—at last—

“No bad news, I trust?” said Mr. Wilkins who had followed her, for when she had read the telegram she stood staring at it and her face went slowly white. Curious to watch how her face went slowly white.

“No bad news, I hope?” said Mr. Wilkins, who had followed her, because when she read the telegram, she just stood there staring at it and her face gradually turned white. Curious to see how her face changed to a ghostly white.

She turned and looked at Mr. Wilkins as if trying to remember him.

She turned and looked at Mr. Wilkins like she was trying to recall him.

“Oh no. On the contrary—”

“Oh no. Quite the opposite—”

She managed to smile. “I’m going to have a visitor,” she said, holding out the telegram; and when he had taken it she walked away towards the dining-room, murmuring something about lunch being ready.

She managed to smile. “I’m going to have a visitor,” she said, holding out the telegram; and when he took it, she walked away toward the dining room, murmuring something about lunch being ready.

Mr. Wilkins read the telegram. It had been sent that morning from Mezzago, and was:

Mr. Wilkins read the telegram. It had been sent that morning from Mezzago, and was:

Am passing through on way to Rome. May I pay my respects this afternoon?

I’m just passing through on my way to Rome. Can I stop by to pay my respects this afternoon?

Thomas Briggs.

Thomas Briggs.

Why should such a telegram make the interesting lady turn pale? For her pallor on reading it had been so striking as to convince Mr. Wilkins she was receiving a blow.

Why would a telegram make such an intriguing woman go pale? Her paleness while reading it was so noticeable that it convinced Mr. Wilkins she was receiving a shock.

“Who is Thomas Briggs?” he asked, following her into the dining-room.

“Who is Thomas Briggs?” he asked, following her into the dining room.

She looked at him vaguely. “Who is—?” she repeated, getting her thoughts together again.

She looked at him with uncertainty. “Who is—?” she repeated, gathering her thoughts once more.

“Thomas Briggs.”

“Tom Briggs.”

“Oh. Yes. He is the owner. This is his house. He is very nice. He is coming this afternoon.”

“Oh. Yes. He owns this place. This is his house. He’s really nice. He’s coming over this afternoon.”

Thomas Briggs was at that very moment coming. He was jogging along the road between Mezzago and Castagneto in a fly, sincerely hoping that the dark-eyed lady would grasp that all he wanted was to see her, and not at all to see if his house were still there. He felt that an owner of delicacy did not intrude on a tenant. But—he had been thinking so much of her since that day. Rose Arbuthnot. Such a pretty name. And such a pretty creature—mild, milky, mothery in the best sense; the best sense being that she wasn’t his mother and couldn’t have been if she had tried, for parents were the only things impossible to have younger than oneself. Also, he was passing so near. It seemed absurd not just to look in and see if she were comfortable. He longed to see her in his house. He longed to see it as her background, to see her sitting in his chairs, drinking out of his cups, using all his things. Did she put the big crimson brocade cushion in the drawing-room behind her little dark head? Her hair and the whiteness of her skin would look lovely against it. Had she seen the portrait of herself on the stairs? He wondered if she liked it. He would explain it to her. If she didn’t paint, and she had said nothing to suggest it, she wouldn’t perhaps notice how exactly the moulding of the eyebrows and the slight hollow of the cheek—

Thomas Briggs was on his way. He was jogging along the road between Mezzago and Castagneto, sincerely hoping that the dark-eyed lady would realize that all he wanted was to see her, not to check if his house was still standing. He felt that a considerate owner shouldn't intrude on a tenant. But he had been thinking about her so much since that day. Rose Arbuthnot. Such a beautiful name. And what a lovely person—gentle, soft, nurturing in the best way; the best way being that she wasn’t his mother and couldn’t have been, because parents were the only people you couldn’t have younger than yourself. Also, he was passing by so close. It seemed silly not to just stop in and see if she was comfortable. He longed to see her in his house. He longed to picture her as part of his setting, to see her sitting in his chairs, drinking from his cups, using all his things. Did she place the big crimson brocade cushion in the drawing-room behind her little dark head? Her hair and the whiteness of her skin would look stunning against it. Had she seen the portrait of herself on the stairs? He wondered if she liked it. He would explain it to her. If she didn’t paint, and she hadn’t mentioned it, she might not even notice how perfectly the shape of the eyebrows and the slight hollow of the cheek—

He told the fly to wait in Castagneto, and crossed the piazza, hailed by children and dogs, who all knew him and sprang up suddenly from nowhere, and walking quickly up the zigzag path, for he was an active young man not much more than thirty, he pulled the ancient chain that rang the bell, and waited decorously on the proper side of the open door to be allowed to come in.

He told the fly to wait in Castagneto, then crossed the plaza, greeted by kids and dogs who all recognized him and suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Walking quickly up the winding path, since he was an active young man just over thirty, he pulled the old chain that rang the bell and patiently stood on the right side of the open door, waiting to be let in.

At the sight of him Francesca flung up every bit of her that would fling up—eyebrows, eyelids, and hands, and volubly assured him that all was in perfect order and that she was doing her duty.

At the sight of him, Francesca raised everything she could raise—her eyebrows, eyelids, and hands—and enthusiastically assured him that everything was in perfect order and that she was fulfilling her duty.

“Of course, of course,” said Briggs, cutting her short. “No one doubts it.”

“Of course, of course,” said Briggs, interrupting her. “No one questions it.”

And he asked her to take in his card to her mistress.

And he asked her to give his card to her boss.

“Which mistress?” asked Francesca.

"Which girlfriend?" asked Francesca.

“Which mistress?”

“Which girlfriend?”

“There are four,” said Francesca, scenting an irregularity on the part of the tenants, for her master looked surprised; and she felt pleased, for life was dull and irregularities helped it along at least a little.

“There are four,” said Francesca, detecting something off about the tenants, since her boss looked surprised; and she felt happy, because life was boring and little surprises made it more interesting.

“Four?” he repeated surprised. “Well, take it to the lot then,” he said, recovering himself, for he noticed her expression.

“Four?” he repeated, surprised. “Well, take it to the lot then,” he said, getting himself together, as he noticed her expression.

Coffee was being drunk in the top garden in the shade of the umbrella pine. Only Mrs. Fisher and Mr. Wilkins were drinking it, for Mrs. Arbuthnot, after eating nothing and being completely silent during lunch, had disappeared immediately afterwards.

Coffee was being enjoyed in the upper garden under the shade of the umbrella pine. Only Mrs. Fisher and Mr. Wilkins were having it, as Mrs. Arbuthnot, having eaten nothing and remained completely quiet during lunch, had vanished right after.

While Francesca went away into the garden with his card, her master stood examining the picture on the staircase of that Madonna by an early Italian painter, name unknown, picked up by him at Orvieto, who was so much like his tenant. It really was remarkable, the likeness. Of course his tenant that day in London had had her hat on, but he was pretty sure her hair grew just like that off her forehead. The expression of the eyes, grave and sweet, was exactly the same. He rejoiced to think that he would always have her portrait.

While Francesca went into the garden with his card, her master stood examining the painting on the staircase of that Madonna by an early Italian painter, name unknown, which he had picked up in Orvieto. She bore a striking resemblance to his tenant. The likeness was truly remarkable. Of course, his tenant that day in London had been wearing a hat, but he was fairly certain her hair curled off her forehead just like that. The expression in the eyes, both serious and sweet, was identical. He was glad to know he would always have her portrait.

He looked up at the sound of footsteps, and there she was, coming down the stairs just as he had imagined her in that place, dressed in white.

He looked up at the sound of footsteps, and there she was, coming down the stairs just like he had pictured her in that moment, wearing white.

She was astonished to see him so soon. She had supposed he would come about tea-time, and till then she had meant to sit somewhere out of doors where she could be by herself.

She was surprised to see him so soon. She had thought he'd arrive around tea time, and until then, she had planned to sit outside somewhere alone.

He watched her coming down the stairs with the utmost eager interest. In a moment she would be level with her portrait.

He watched her come down the stairs with intense curiosity. In a moment, she would be right next to her portrait.

“It really is extraordinary,” said Briggs.

"It’s so amazing," said Briggs.

“How do you do,” said Rose, intent only on a decent show of welcome.

“Nice to meet you,” said Rose, focused only on giving a proper greeting.

She did not welcome him. He was here, she felt, the telegram bitter in her heart, instead of Frederick, doing what she had longed Frederick would do, taking his place.

She didn't welcome him. She felt that he was here, the telegram bitter in her heart, instead of Frederick, doing what she had always hoped Frederick would do, taking his place.

“Just stand still a moment—”

“Just hold still for a sec—”

She obeyed automatically.

She followed instinctively.

“Yes—quite astonishing. Do you mind taking off your hat?”

“Yes—it's quite astonishing. Could you please take off your hat?”

Rose, surprised, took it off obediently.

Rose, taken aback, removed it without hesitation.

“Yes—I thought so—I just wanted to make sure. And look—have you noticed—”

“Yes—I thought so—I just wanted to make sure. And look—have you noticed—”

He began to make odd swift passes with his hand over the face in the picture, measuring it, looking from it to her.

He started making strange quick gestures with his hand over the face in the picture, assessing it, glancing back and forth between it and her.

Rose’s surprise became amusement, and she could not help smiling. “Have you come to compare me with my original?” she asked.

Rose's surprise turned into amusement, and she couldn’t help but smile. “Have you come to compare me to my original?” she asked.

“You do see how extraordinarily alike—”

“You see how similar—”

“I didn’t know I looked so solemn.”

“I didn’t realize I looked so serious.”

“You don’t. Not now. You did a minute ago, quite as solemn. Oh yes—how do you do,” he finished suddenly, noticing her outstretched hand. And he laughed and shook it, flushing—a trick of his—to the roots of his fair hair.

“You don’t. Not now. You did a minute ago, just as serious. Oh yes—how’s it going,” he added suddenly, noticing her outstretched hand. And he laughed and shook it, blushing—a quirk of his—to the roots of his blonde hair.

Francesca came back. “The Signora Fisher,” she said, “will be pleased to see him.”

Francesca returned. “Signora Fisher,” she said, “will be happy to see him.”

“Who is the Signora Fisher?” he asked Rose.

“Who is Signora Fisher?” he asked Rose.

“One of the four who are sharing your house.”

"One of the four people living in your house."

“Then there are four of you?”

“Wait, so there are four of you?”

“Yes. My friend and I found we couldn’t afford it by ourselves.”

“Yes. My friend and I realized we couldn’t pay for it on our own.”

“Oh, I say—” began Briggs in confusion, for he would best have liked Rose Arbuthnot—pretty name—not to have to afford anything, but to stay at San Salvatore as long as she liked as his guest.

“Oh, I mean—” started Briggs, feeling confused, because he would have preferred Rose Arbuthnot—nice name—not to have to pay for anything, but to stay at San Salvatore as long as she wanted as his guest.

“Mrs. Fisher is having coffee in the top garden,” said Rose. “I’ll take you to her and introduce you.”

“Mrs. Fisher is having coffee in the upper garden,” said Rose. “I’ll take you to her and introduce you.”

“I don’t want to go. You’ve got your hat on, so you were going for a walk. Mayn’t I come too? I’d immensely like being shown round by you.”

“I don’t want to go. You’ve got your hat on, so you’re going for a walk. Can’t I come too? I’d really love to be shown around by you.”

“But Mrs. Fisher is waiting for you.”

“But Mrs. Fisher is waiting for you.”

“Won’t she keep?”

“Will she stay?”

“Yes,” said Rose, with the smile that had so much attracted him the first day. “I think she will keep quite well till tea.”

“Yes,” said Rose, with the smile that had so much drawn him in on the first day. “I think she’ll be just fine until tea.”

“Do you speak Italian?”

“Do you speak Italian?”

“No,” said Rose. “Why?”

“No,” Rose said. “Why?”

On that he turned to Francesca, and told her at a great rate, for in Italian he was glib, to go back to the Signora in the top garden and tell her he had encountered his old friend the Signora Arbuthnot, and was going for a walk with her and would present himself to her later.

On that, he turned to Francesca and quickly told her, since he was fluent in Italian, to go back to the Signora in the upper garden and let her know he had run into his old friend, Signora Arbuthnot, and that he was going for a walk with her and would come to see her later.

“Do you invite me to tea?” he asked Rose, when Francesca had gone.

“Are you inviting me to tea?” he asked Rose after Francesca had left.

“Of course. It’s your house.”

"Of course. It's your home."

“It isn’t. It’s yours.”

"It isn’t. It’s yours."

“Till Monday week,” she smiled.

"See you Monday week," she smiled.

“Come and show me all the views,” he said eagerly; and it was plain, even to the self-depreciatory Rose, that she did not bore Mr. Briggs.

“Come and show me all the views,” he said eagerly; and it was clear, even to the self-critical Rose, that she did not bore Mr. Briggs.

Chapter 18

They had a very pleasant walk, with a great deal of sitting down in warm, thyme-fragrant corners, and if anything could have helped Rose to recover from the bitter disappointment of the morning it would have been the company and conversation of Mr. Briggs. He did help her to recover, and the same process took place as that which Lotty had undergone with her husband, and the more Mr. Briggs thought Rose charming the more charming she became.

They had a really nice walk, with plenty of time spent sitting in cozy, thyme-scented spots, and if anything could have helped Rose get over the harsh disappointment of the morning, it was the company and conversation of Mr. Briggs. He did help her feel better, and the same thing happened to her as it had with Lotty and her husband; the more Mr. Briggs found Rose charming, the more charming she became.

Briggs was a man incapable of concealments, who never lost time if he could help it. They had not got to the end of the headland where the lighthouse is—Briggs asked her to show him the lighthouse, because the path to it, he knew, was wide enough for two to walk abreast and fairly level—before he had told her of the impression she had made on him in London.

Briggs was a straightforward guy who never wasted time if he could avoid it. They hadn't even reached the end of the headland where the lighthouse is—Briggs asked her to show him the lighthouse because he knew the path to it was wide enough for two people to walk side by side and pretty flat—before he had told her how much of an impression she had made on him in London.

Since even the most religious, sober women like to know they have made an impression, particularly the kind that has nothing to do with character or merits, Rose was pleased. Being pleased, she smiled. Smiling, she was more attractive than ever. Colour came into her cheeks, and brightness into her eyes. She heard herself saying things that really sounded quite interesting and even amusing. If Frederick were listening now, she thought, perhaps he would see that she couldn’t after all be such a hopeless bore; for here was a man, nice-looking, young, and surely clever—he seemed clever, and she hoped he was, for then the compliment would be still greater—who was evidently quite happy to spend the afternoon just talking to her.

Since even the most religious, sober women like to know they’ve made an impression, particularly one that has nothing to do with their character or merits, Rose was pleased. Being pleased, she smiled. With her smile, she became more attractive than ever. Color filled her cheeks, and her eyes sparkled. She noticed herself saying things that actually sounded pretty interesting and even funny. If Frederick were listening now, she thought, maybe he would see that she couldn’t really be such a hopeless bore; here was a nice-looking, young man who seemed smart—she hoped he was smart, because that would make the compliment even better—who was clearly happy to spend the afternoon just talking to her.

And indeed Mr. Briggs seemed very much interested. He wanted to hear all about everything she had been doing from the moment she got there. He asked her if she had seen this, that, and the other in the house, what she liked best, which room she had, if she were comfortable, if Francesca was behaving, if Domenico took care of her, and whether she didn’t enjoy using the yellow sitting-room—the one that got all the sun and looked out towards Genoa.

And Mr. Briggs really seemed very interested. He wanted to hear everything she had been up to since she arrived. He asked her if she had seen this, that, and the other in the house, what she liked the most, which room she had, if she was comfortable, whether Francesca was behaving, if Domenico was taking care of her, and if she enjoyed using the yellow sitting room—the one that got all the sun and looked out toward Genoa.

Rose was ashamed how little she had noticed in the house, and how few of the things he spoke of as curious or beautiful in it she had even seen. Swamped in thoughts of Frederick, she appeared to have lived in San Salvatore blindly, and more than half the time had gone, and what had been the good of it? She might just as well have been sitting hankering on Hampstead Heath. No, she mightn’t; through all her hankerings she had been conscious that she was at least in the very heart of beauty; and indeed it was this beauty, this longing to share it, that had first started her off hankering.

Rose felt embarrassed about how little she had noticed in the house and how few of the things he described as interesting or beautiful she had even seen. Lost in thoughts of Frederick, it seemed like she had lived in San Salvatore without really seeing it, and more than half the time had passed—what was the point? She might as well have been sitting around daydreaming on Hampstead Heath. No, she wouldn’t; amid all her daydreaming, she had been aware that she was at least in the very heart of beauty, and in fact, it was this beauty and her desire to share it that had initially sparked her longing.

Mr. Briggs, however, was too much alive for her to be able to spare any attention at this moment for Frederick, and she praised the servants in answer to his questions, and praised the yellow sitting-room without telling him she had only been in it once and then was ignominiously ejected, and she told him she knew hardly anything about art and curiosities, but thought perhaps if somebody would tell her about them she would know more, and she said she had spent every day since her arrival out-of-doors, because out-of-doors there was so very wonderful and different from anything she had ever seen.

Mr. Briggs, however, was so captivating that she couldn't focus on Frederick at that moment. She praised the staff in response to his questions and complimented the yellow sitting room, without mentioning that she had only been in it once and had been unceremoniously kicked out. She told him that she didn't know much about art and collectibles but thought that if someone explained them to her, she'd learn more. She also mentioned that she had spent every day since her arrival outside because everything outdoors was so amazing and unlike anything she had ever experienced.

Briggs walked by her side along his paths that were yet so happily for the moment her paths, and felt all the innocent glows of family life. He was an orphan and an only child, and had a warm, domestic disposition. He would have adored a sister and spoilt a mother, and was beginning at this time to think of marrying; for though he had been very happy with his various loves, each of whom, contrary to the usual experience, turned ultimately into his devoted friend, he was fond of children and thought he had perhaps now got to the age of settling if he did not wish to be too old by the time his eldest son was twenty. San Salvatore had latterly seemed a little forlorn. He fancied it echoed when he walked about it. He had felt lonely there; so lonely that he had preferred this year to miss out a spring and let it. It wanted a wife in it. It wanted that final touch of warmth and beauty, for he never thought of his wife except in terms of warmth and beauty—she would of course be beautiful and kind. It amused him how much in love with this vague wife he was already.

Briggs walked beside her on paths that were happily his, at least for now, and felt all the simple joys of family life. He was an orphan and an only child, with a warm, homey personality. He would have loved having a sister and would have spoiled a mother, and he was starting to think about marriage; even though he had been very happy with his past loves, each of whom, unlike most experiences, became his devoted friend in the end, he loved children and thought it might be time to settle down before he got too old by the time his first son turned twenty. Lately, San Salvatore had felt a bit empty. He thought it echoed when he walked around it. He felt so lonely there that he chose to skip spring this year. It needed a wife; it needed that final touch of warmth and beauty, since he always envisioned his wife as warm and beautiful—she would, of course, be kind and lovely. It amused him how in love he was already with this imaginary wife.

At such a rate was he making friends with the lady with the sweet name as he walked along the path towards the lighthouse, that he was sure presently he would be telling her everything about himself and his past doings and his future hopes; and the thought of such a swiftly developing confidence made him laugh.

He was making friends with the lady with the sweet name at such a pace as he walked down the path to the lighthouse that he was certain he'd soon be sharing all about himself, his past experiences, and his future dreams; the idea of this quickly growing trust made him laugh.

“Why are you laughing?” she asked, looking at him and smiling.

“Why are you laughing?” she asked, looking at him and smiling.

“It’s so like coming home,” he said.

“It feels so much like coming home,” he said.

“But it is coming home for you to come here.”

"But it’s time for you to come here."

“I mean really like coming home. To one’s—one’s family. I never had a family. I’m an orphan.”

“I really like coming home. To one’s—one’s family. I never had a family. I’m an orphan.”

“Oh, are you?” said Rose with the proper sympathy. “I hope you’ve not been one very long. No—I mean I hope you have been one very long. No—I don’t know what I mean, except that I’m sorry.”

“Oh, really?” said Rose with genuine sympathy. “I hope you haven’t been one for too long. No—I mean I hope you have been one for a long time. No—I’m not sure what I mean, except that I’m sorry.”

He laughed again. “Oh I’m used to it. I haven’t anybody. No sisters or brothers.”

He laughed again. “Oh, I’m used to it. I don’t have anyone. No sisters or brothers.”

“Then you’re an only child,” she observed intelligently.

“Then you’re the only child,” she noted wisely.

“Yes. And there’s something about you that’s exactly my idea of a—of a family.”

"Yes. And there’s something about you that perfectly fits my idea of a—of a family."

She was amused.

She found it amusing.

“So—cosy,” he said, looking at her and searching for a word.

“So cozy,” he said, looking at her and searching for the right word.

“You wouldn’t think so if you saw my house in Hampstead,” she said, a vision of that austere and hard-seated dwelling presenting itself to her mind, with nothing soft in it except the shunned and neglected Du Barri sofa. No wonder, she thought, for a moment clear-brained, that Frederick avoided it. There was nothing cosy about his family.

“You wouldn’t think that if you saw my house in Hampstead,” she said, picturing that stark and uncomfortable place in her mind, with nothing soft about it except for the ignored and worn Du Barri sofa. No wonder, she thought for a moment with clarity, that Frederick stayed away from it. There was nothing cozy about his family.

“I don’t believe any place you lived in could be anything but exactly like you,” he said.

“I don’t think anywhere you’ve lived could be anything other than exactly like you,” he said.

“You’re not going to pretend San Salvatore is like me?”

“You’re not going to act like San Salvatore is anything like me?”

“Indeed I do pretend it. Surely you admit that it is beautiful?”

“Of course I’m pretending it. You have to admit that it’s beautiful, right?”

He said several things like that. She enjoyed her walk. She could not recollect any walk so pleasant since her courting days.

He said a few things like that. She enjoyed her walk. She couldn't remember any walk being this pleasant since her dating days.

She came back to tea, bringing Mr. Briggs, and looking quite different, Mr. Wilkins noticed, from what she had looked till then. Trouble here, trouble here, thought Mr. Wilkins, mentally rubbing his professional hands. He could see himself being called in presently to advise. On the one hand there was Arbuthnot, on the other hand here was Briggs. Trouble brewing, trouble sooner or later. But why had Briggs’s telegram acted on the lady like a blow? If she had turned pale from excess of joy, then trouble was nearer than he had supposed. She was not pale now; she was more like her name than he had yet seen her. Well, he was the man for trouble. He regretted, of course, that people should get into it, but being in he was their man.

She returned for tea, bringing Mr. Briggs, and looked quite different, Mr. Wilkins noticed, from how she had appeared until then. Trouble here, trouble here, Mr. Wilkins thought, mentally rubbing his hands together. He could picture himself being called in soon to offer advice. On one side was Arbuthnot, and on the other was Briggs. Trouble was brewing, sooner or later. But why did Briggs's telegram hit her like a blow? If she had turned pale with too much joy, then trouble was closer than he had thought. She wasn’t pale now; she looked more like her name than he had ever seen her. Well, he was the right person for trouble. He regretted, of course, that people found themselves in it, but once they were, he was their guy.

And Mr. Wilkins, invigorated by these thoughts, his career being very precious to him, proceeded to assist in doing the honours to Mr. Briggs, both in his quality of sharer in the temporary ownership of San Salvatore and of probable helper out of difficulties, with great hospitality, and pointed out the various features of the place to him, and led him to the parapet and showed him Mezzago across the bay.

And Mr. Wilkins, energized by these thoughts and valuing his career highly, went on to warmly welcome Mr. Briggs, both as a co-owner of San Salvatore for the time being and as a likely ally in overcoming challenges. He showed him around the place with great hospitality, highlighted the various features, and took him to the parapet to point out Mezzago across the bay.

Mrs. Fisher too was gracious. This was this young man’s house. He was a man of property. She liked property, and she liked men of property. Also there seemed a peculiar merit in being a man of property so young. Inheritance, of course; and inheritance was more respectable than acquisition. It did indicate fathers; and in an age where most people appeared neither to have them nor to want them she liked this too.

Mrs. Fisher was also gracious. This young man owned this house. He was wealthy. She liked wealth, and she liked wealthy men. There was also something impressive about being a wealthy man at such a young age. Inheritance, of course; and inheritance was seen as more respectable than earning it. It suggested there were fathers involved; and in a time when most people seemed to have neither fathers nor any desire for them, she found that appealing too.

Accordingly it was a pleasant meal, with everybody amiable and pleased. Briggs thought Mrs. Fisher a dear old lady, and showed he thought so; and again the magic worked, and she became a dear old lady. She developed benignity with him, and a kind of benignity which was almost playful—actually before tea was over including in some observation she made him the words “My dear boy.”

It was a nice meal, with everyone friendly and happy. Briggs considered Mrs. Fisher a sweet old lady and made it clear he felt that way; and once again, the magic happened, and she turned into that sweet old lady. She became kind towards him, with a kind of kindness that was almost playful—actually, before tea was over, she included the words “My dear boy” in some comments she made to him.

Strange words in Mrs. Fisher’s mouth. It is doubtful whether in her life she had used them before. Rose was astonished. How nice people really were. When would she leave off making mistakes about them? She hadn’t suspected this side of Mrs. Fisher, and she began to wonder whether those other sides of her with which alone she was acquainted had not perhaps after all been the effect of her own militant and irritating behaviour. Probably they were. How horrid, then, she must have been. She felt very penitent when she saw Mrs. Fisher beneath her eyes blossoming out into real amiability the moment some one came along who was charming to her, and she could have sunk into the ground with shame when Mrs. Fisher presently laughed, and she realised by the shock it gave her that the sound was entirely new. Not once before had she or any one else there heard Mrs. Fisher laugh. What an indictment of the lot of them! For they had all laughed, the others, some more and some less, at one time or another since their arrival, and only Mrs. Fisher had not. Clearly, since she could enjoy herself as she was now enjoying herself, she had not enjoyed herself before. Nobody had cared whether she did or not, except perhaps Lotty. Yes; Lotty had cared, and had wanted her to be happy; but Lotty seemed to produce a bad effect on Mrs. Fisher, while as for Rose herself she had never been with her for five minutes without wanting, really wanting, to provoke and oppose her.

Strange words coming out of Mrs. Fisher’s mouth. It’s hard to believe she had ever used them before. Rose was shocked. People could really be nice. When would she stop getting them wrong? She hadn’t seen this side of Mrs. Fisher and started to wonder if the other sides she knew were just a result of her own bossy and annoying behavior. Probably they were. How awful she must have seemed. She felt really sorry when she watched Mrs. Fisher, who seemed to brighten up into genuine friendliness the moment someone charming showed up, and she could have disappeared into the ground with embarrassment when Mrs. Fisher laughed, realizing with a jolt that it was a completely new sound. Not once before had she or anyone else there heard Mrs. Fisher laugh. What a shame for all of them! Because they had all laughed at some point since arriving, some more than others, and only Mrs. Fisher hadn’t. Clearly, since she was now able to enjoy herself, she hadn’t enjoyed herself before. Nobody had cared if she did or not, except maybe Lotty. Yes, Lotty had cared and wanted her to be happy, but it seemed that Lotty made things worse for Mrs. Fisher, whereas Rose herself had never spent even five minutes with her without feeling a strong urge to irritate and challenge her.

How very horrid she had been. She had behaved unpardonably. Her penitence showed itself in a shy and deferential solicitude towards Mrs. Fisher which made the observant Briggs think her still more angelic, and wish for a moment that he were an old lady himself in order to be behaved to by Rose Arbuthnot just like that. There was evidently no end, he thought, to the things she could do sweetly. He would even not mind taking medicine, really nasty medicine, if it were Rose Arbuthnot bending over him with the dose.

How awful she had been. She had acted completely inexcusable. Her remorse was evident in her shy and respectful concern for Mrs. Fisher, which made the observant Briggs think she looked even more like an angel and for a moment wish he were an old lady just to be treated by Rose Arbuthnot that way. He clearly thought there was no limit to the sweet things she could do. He wouldn’t even mind taking really nasty medicine if it meant Rose Arbuthnot was the one administering it.

She felt his bright blue eyes, the brighter because he was so sunburnt, fixed on her with a twinkle in them, and smiling asked him what he was thinking about.

She felt his bright blue eyes, even more vibrant because he was so sunburned, locked on her with a twinkle in them, and smiling, she asked him what he was thinking about.

But he couldn’t very well tell her that, he said; and added, “Some day.”

But he couldn’t really tell her that, he said; and added, “Some day.”

“Trouble, trouble,” thought Mr. Wilkins at this, again mentally rubbing his hands. “Well, I’m their man.”

“Trouble, trouble,” thought Mr. Wilkins at this, again mentally rubbing his hands. “Well, I’m the right person for this.”

“I’m sure,” said Mrs. Fisher benignly, “you have no thoughts we may not hear.”

"I'm sure," Mrs. Fisher said kindly, "you have nothing you wouldn't want us to hear."

“I’m sure,” said Briggs, “I would be telling you every one of my secrets in a week.”

“I’m sure,” said Briggs, “I’d be sharing all my secrets with you in a week.”

“You would be telling somebody very safe, then,” said Mrs. Fisher benevolently—just such a son would she have liked to have had. “And in return,” she went on, “I daresay I would tell you mine.”

"You'd be talking about someone very reliable, then," Mrs. Fisher said kindly—just the kind of son she would have loved to have. "And in return," she continued, "I bet I would share mine with you."

“Ah no,” said Mr. Wilkins, adapting himself to this tone of easy badinage, “I must protest. I really must. I have a prior claim, I am the older friend. I have known Mrs. Fisher ten days, and you, Briggs, have not yet known her one. I assert my right to be told her secrets first. That is,” he added, bowing gallantly, “if she has any—which I beg leave to doubt.”

“Ah no,” said Mr. Wilkins, fitting into this casual banter, “I have to object. I really do. I have a prior claim; I'm the older friend. I’ve known Mrs. Fisher for ten days, and you, Briggs, haven’t known her for even one. I assert my right to hear her secrets first. That is,” he added, bowing politely, “if she has any—which I doubt.”

“Oh, haven’t I!” exclaimed Mrs. Fisher, thinking of those green leaves. That she should exclaim at all was surprising, but that she should do it with gaiety was miraculous. Rose could only watch her in wonder.

“Oh, haven’t I!” Mrs. Fisher exclaimed, thinking about those green leaves. It was surprising that she exclaimed at all, but it was miraculous that she did so with such cheer. Rose could only watch her in amazement.

“Then I shall worm them out,” said Briggs with equal gaiety.

“Then I will find a way to get them out,” said Briggs with the same cheerful attitude.

“They won’t need much worming out,” said Mrs. Fisher. “My difficulty is to keep them from bursting out.”

“They won’t need much convincing,” said Mrs. Fisher. “My challenge is to keep them from spilling over.”

It might have been Lotty talking. Mr. Wilkins adjusted the single eyeglass he carried with him for occasions like this, and examined Mrs. Fisher carefully. Rose looked on, unable not to smile too since Mrs. Fisher seemed so much amused, though Rose did not quite know why, and her smile was a little uncertain, for Mrs. Fisher amused was a new sight, not without its awe-inspiring aspects, and had to be got accustomed to.

It could have been Lotty talking. Mr. Wilkins adjusted the single eyeglass he brought along for moments like this and took a close look at Mrs. Fisher. Rose watched, unable to help but smile too since Mrs. Fisher seemed so entertained, even though Rose wasn't entirely sure why. Her smile was a bit hesitant, as seeing Mrs. Fisher amused was a new experience, not without its impressive qualities, and it would take some getting used to.

What Mrs. Fisher was thinking was how much surprised they would be if she told them of her very odd and exciting sensation of going to come out all over buds. They would think she was an extremely silly old woman, and so would she have thought as lately as two days ago; but the bud idea was becoming familiar to her, she was more apprivoisée now, as dear Matthew Arnold used to say, and though it would undoubtedly be best if one’s appearance and sensations matched, yet supposing they did not—and one couldn’t have everything—was it not better to feel young somewhere rather than old everywhere? Time enough to be old everywhere again, inside as well as out, when she got back to her sarcophagus in Prince of Wales Terrace.

What Mrs. Fisher was thinking was how surprised they would be if she told them about her strange and thrilling feeling of blooming all over with new life. They would probably think she was a really silly old woman, and she would have thought the same just two days ago; but the idea of blossoming was starting to feel familiar to her, she was feeling more tamed now, as dear Matthew Arnold used to put it, and although it would definitely be best if her appearance and feelings lined up, what if they didn’t—and you can’t have everything—wasn’t it better to feel young in some ways rather than old in all? There would be plenty of time to feel old everywhere again, both inside and out, when she returned to her resting place in Prince of Wales Terrace.

Yet it is probable that without the arrival of Briggs Mrs. Fisher would have gone on secretly fermenting in her shell. The others only knew her as severe. It would have been more than her dignity could bear suddenly to relax—especially towards the three young women. But now came the stranger Briggs, a stranger who at once took to her as no young man had taken to her in her life, and it was the coming of Briggs and his real and manifest appreciation—for just such a grandmother, thought Briggs, hungry for home life and its concomitants, would he have liked to have—that released Mrs. Fisher from her shell; and here she was at last, as Lotty had predicted, pleased, good-humoured and benevolent.

Yet it's likely that if Briggs hadn't shown up, Mrs. Fisher would have continued to hide away in her shell. The others only saw her as strict. It would have been too hard for her dignity to handle suddenly letting go—especially around the three young women. But then came Briggs, a stranger who immediately connected with her like no young man ever had in her life. His genuine appreciation—for exactly the kind of grandmother he had longed for, someone craving the warmth of home and everything that comes with it—was what finally freed Mrs. Fisher from her shell. And here she was at last, just as Lotty had predicted, happy, easygoing, and kind.

Lotty, coming back half an hour later from her picnic, and following the sound of voices into the top garden in the hope of still finding tea, saw at once what had happened, for Mrs. Fisher at that very moment was laughing.

Lotty came back thirty minutes later from her picnic and, following the sound of voices into the upper garden hoping to still find tea, immediately saw what had happened, because Mrs. Fisher was laughing at that very moment.

“She’s burst her cocoon,” thought Lotty; and swift as she was in all her movements, and impulsive, and also without any sense of propriety to worry and delay her, she bent over the back of Mrs. Fisher’s chair and kissed her.

"She's come out of her shell," thought Lotty; and as quick as she was in all her movements, impulsive, and without any sense of propriety to hold her back, she leaned over the back of Mrs. Fisher's chair and kissed her.

“Good gracious!” cried Mrs. Fisher, starting violently, for such a thing had not happened to her since Mr. Fisher’s earlier days, and then only gingerly. This kiss was a real kiss, and rested on Mrs. Fisher’s cheek a moment with a strange, soft sweetness.

“Good gracious!” exclaimed Mrs. Fisher, jumping in surprise, as this hadn’t happened to her since the early days with Mr. Fisher, and even then it was done hesitantly. This kiss was a genuine kiss, lingering on Mrs. Fisher’s cheek for a moment with an unusual, gentle sweetness.

When she saw whose it was, a deep flush spread over her face. Mrs. Wilkins kissing her and the kiss feeling so affectionate. . . Even if she had wanted to she could not in the presence of the appreciative Mr. Briggs resume her cast-off severity and begin rebuking again; but she did not want to. Was it possible Mrs. Wilkins liked her—had liked her all this time, while she had been so much disliking her herself? A queer little trickle of warmth filtered through the frozen defences of Mrs. Fisher’s heart. Somebody young kissing her—somebody young wanting to kiss her. . . Very much flushed, she watched the strange creature, apparently quite unconscious she had done anything extraordinary, shaking hands with Mr. Briggs, on her husband’s introducing him, and immediately embarking on the friendliest conversation with him, exactly as if she had known him all her life. What a strange creature; what a very strange creature. It was natural, she being so strange, that one should have, perhaps, misjudged her. . .

When she realized whose it was, her face turned bright red. Mrs. Wilkins kissed her, and the kiss felt so warm and affectionate. Even if she had wanted to, she couldn’t go back to being harsh in front of the appreciative Mr. Briggs; but she didn’t want to anyway. Was it possible that Mrs. Wilkins liked her—had liked her all along, while she had been so busy disliking her? A strange little spark of warmth broke through the cold barriers around Mrs. Fisher’s heart. Someone young was kissing her—someone young who actually wanted to kiss her… Feeling very flustered, she watched this odd person, completely unaware that she had done anything out of the ordinary, shaking hands with Mr. Briggs when her husband introduced him, and immediately starting the friendliest conversation with him, as if she had known him forever. What a strange person; what a really strange person. It made sense, given her oddness, that someone might have misjudged her...

“I’m sure you want some tea,” said Briggs with eager hospitality to Lotty. He thought her delightful,—freckles, picnic-untidiness and all. Just such a sister would he—

“I’m sure you want some tea,” said Briggs warmly to Lotty. He found her charming—freckles, messy from the picnic, and all. Just the kind of sister he would—

“This is cold,” he said, feeling the teapot. “I’ll tell Francesca to make you some fresh—”

“This is cold,” he said, touching the teapot. “I’ll ask Francesca to make you some fresh—”

He broke off and blushed. “Aren’t I forgetting myself,” he said, laughing and looking round at them.

He paused and blushed. “Am I forgetting myself?” he said, laughing and looking around at them.

“Very natural, very natural,” Mr. Wilkins reassured him.

“Totally natural, totally natural,” Mr. Wilkins assured him.

“I’ll go and tell Francesca,” said Rose, getting up.

“I’ll go tell Francesca,” Rose said as she got up.

“No, no,” said Briggs. “Don’t go away.” And he put his hands to his mouth and shouted.

“No, no,” Briggs said. “Don’t leave.” And he cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled.

“Francesca!” shouted Briggs.

“Francesca!” Briggs shouted.

She came running. No summons in their experience had been answered by her with such celerity.

She came running. No request in their experience had been met by her with such speed.

“‘Her Master’s voice,’” remarked Mr. Wilkins; aptly, he considered.

“‘Her Master’s voice,’” Mr. Wilkins remarked; he thought it was quite fitting.

“Make fresh tea,” ordered Briggs in Italian. “Quick—quick—” And then remembering himself he blushed again, and begged everybody’s pardon.

“Make fresh tea,” Briggs ordered in Italian. “Hurry—hurry—” Then, realizing himself, he flushed again and apologized to everyone.

“Very natural, very natural,” Mr. Wilkins reassured him.

“Totally natural, totally natural,” Mr. Wilkins assured him.

Briggs then explained to Lotty what he had explained twice already, once to Rose and once to the other two, that he was on his way to Rome and thought he would get out at Mezzago and just look in to see if they were comfortable and continue his journey the next day, staying the night in an hotel at Mezzago.

Briggs then told Lotty what he had already explained twice, once to Rose and once to the other two: he was heading to Rome and planned to stop in Mezzago to check if they were comfortable before continuing his journey the next day, spending the night at a hotel in Mezzago.

“But how ridiculous,” said Lotty. “Of course you must stay here. It’s your house. There’s Kate Lumley’s room,” she added, turning to Mrs. Fisher. “You wouldn’t mind Mr. Briggs having it for one night? Kate Lumley isn’t in it, you know,” she said turning to Briggs again and laughing.

“But how ridiculous,” Lotty said. “Of course you have to stay here. It’s your house. There’s Kate Lumley’s room,” she added, turning to Mrs. Fisher. “You wouldn’t mind if Mr. Briggs used it for one night, would you? Kate Lumley isn’t in there, you know,” she said, turning to Briggs again and laughing.

And Mrs. Fisher to her immense surprise laughed too. She knew that at any other time this remark would have struck her as excessively unseemly, and yet now she only thought it funny.

And Mrs. Fisher, to her great surprise, laughed too. She knew that at any other time this comment would have seemed completely inappropriate, and yet now she just found it amusing.

No indeed, she assured Briggs, Kate Lumley was not in that room. Very fortunately, for she was an excessively wide person and the room was excessively narrow. Kate Lumley might get into it, but that was about all. Once in, she would fit it so tightly that probably she would never be able to get out again. It was entirely at Mr. Briggs’s disposal, and she hoped he would do nothing so absurd as go to an hotel—he, the owner of the whole place.

No, she assured Briggs, Kate Lumley was definitely not in that room. Luckily, because she was quite large and the room was very small. Kate Lumley could squeeze in, but that would be about it. Once inside, she would be so cramped that she probably wouldn't be able to get out again. The room was completely at Mr. Briggs’s disposal, and she hoped he wouldn’t do something as ridiculous as go to a hotel—he, the owner of the entire place.

Rose listened to this speech wide-eyed with amazement. Mrs. Fisher laughed very much as she made it. Lotty laughed very much too, and at the end of it bent down and kissed her again—kissed her several times.

Rose listened to this speech with wide eyes, amazed. Mrs. Fisher laughed a lot as she said it. Lotty laughed a lot too, and at the end, she leaned down and kissed her again—kissed her several times.

“So you see, my dear boy,” said Mrs. Fisher, “you must stay here and give us all a great deal of pleasure.”

“So you see, my dear boy,” Mrs. Fisher said, “you need to stay here and bring us all a lot of joy.”

“A great deal indeed,” corroborated Mr. Wilkins heartily.

"Absolutely," Mr. Wilkins said excitedly.

“A very great deal,” repeated Mrs. Fisher, looking exactly like a pleased mother.

“A whole lot,” repeated Mrs. Fisher, looking just like a happy mom.

“Do,” said Rose, on Briggs’s turning inquiringly to her.

“Do,” said Rose, as Briggs turned to her with a questioning look.

“How kind of you all,” he said, his face broad with smiles. “I’d love to be a guest here. What a new sensation. And with three such—”

“How nice of you all,” he said, his face filled with smiles. “I’d love to be a guest here. What a new experience. And with three such—”

He broke off and looked round. “I say,” he asked, “oughtn’t I to have a fourth hostess? Francesca said she had four mistresses.”

He stopped and looked around. “Hey,” he asked, “shouldn’t I have a fourth hostess? Francesca mentioned she had four mistresses.”

“Yes. There’s Lady Caroline,” said Lotty.

“Yes. There’s Lady Caroline,” Lotty said.

“Then hadn’t we better find out first if she invites me too?”

“Then shouldn’t we find out first if she’s inviting me too?”

“Oh, but she’s sure—” began Lotty.

“Oh, but she’s sure—” started Lotty.

“The daughter of the Droitwiches, Briggs,” said Mr. Wilkins, “is not likely to be wanting in the proper hospitable impulses.”

“The daughter of the Droitwiches, Briggs,” said Mr. Wilkins, “is probably not going to lack the right hospitable instincts.”

“The daughter of the—” repeated Briggs; but he stopped dead, for there in the doorway was the daughter of the Droitwiches herself; or rather, coming towards him out of the dark doorway into the brightness of the sunset, was that which he had not in his life yet seen but only dreamed of, his ideal of absolute loveliness.

“The daughter of the—” repeated Briggs; but he stopped dead, for there in the doorway was the daughter of the Droitwiches herself; or rather, coming towards him out of the dark doorway into the brightness of the sunset, was what he had never seen in his life but only dreamed of, his ideal of absolute loveliness.

Chapter 19

And then when she spoke . . . what chance was there for poor Briggs? He was undone. All Scrap said was, “How do you do,” on Mr. Wilkins presenting him, but it was enough; it undid Briggs.

And then when she spoke... what hope did poor Briggs have? He was finished. All Scrap said was, "How do you do," when Mr. Wilkins introduced him, but that was all it took; it destroyed Briggs.

From a cheerful, chatty, happy young man, overflowing with life and friendliness, he became silent, solemn, and with little beads on his temples. Also he became clumsy, dropping the teaspoon as he handed her her cup, mismanaging the macaroons, so that one rolled on the ground. His eyes could not keep off the enchanting face for a moment; and when Mr. Wilkins, elucidating him, for he failed to elucidate himself, informed Lady Caroline that in Mr. Briggs she beheld the owner of San Salvatore, who was on his way to Rome, but had got out at Mezzago, etc. etc., and that the other three ladies had invited him to spend the night in what was to all intents and purposes his own house rather than an hotel, and Mr. Briggs was only waiting for the seal of her approval to this invitation, she being the fourth hostess—when Mr. Wilkins, balancing his sentences and being admirably clear and enjoying the sound of his own cultured voice, explained the position in this manner to Lady Caroline, Briggs sat and said never a word.

From a cheerful, chatty, happy young man, full of life and friendliness, he turned silent, serious, and beads of sweat formed on his temples. He also became clumsy, dropping the teaspoon as he handed her the cup, mismanaging the macaroons so that one rolled onto the floor. His eyes couldn't leave her enchanting face for a second; and when Mr. Wilkins, trying to explain him since he couldn’t explain himself, told Lady Caroline that Mr. Briggs was the owner of San Salvatore, who was on his way to Rome but had stopped at Mezzago, and that the other three ladies had invited him to spend the night in what was, for all intents and purposes, his own house rather than a hotel, and Mr. Briggs was just waiting for her approval on this invitation since she was the fourth hostess—when Mr. Wilkins, organizing his thoughts and being perfectly clear and enjoying the sound of his own cultured voice, explained the situation to Lady Caroline, Briggs sat and said nothing.

A deep melancholy invaded Scrap. The symptoms of the incipient grabber were all there and only too familiar, and she knew that if Briggs stayed her rest-cure might be regarded as over.

A deep sadness overwhelmed Scrap. The signs of the developing grabber were all there and all too familiar, and she realized that if Briggs stayed, her rest cure might be considered finished.

Then Kate Lumley occurred to her. She caught at Kate as at a straw.

Then Kate Lumley came to mind. She grabbed onto the thought of Kate like it was a lifeline.

“It would have been delightful,” she said, faintly smiling at Briggs—she could not in decency not smile, at least a little, but even a little betrayed the dimple, and Briggs’s eyes became more fixed than ever—“I’m only wondering if there is room.”

“It would have been great,” she said, giving Briggs a slight smile—she couldn't just not smile, at least a bit, but even a bit showed the dimple, and Briggs’s gaze became more intense than ever—“I’m just wondering if there’s enough space.”

“Yes, there is,” said Lotty. “There’s Kate Lumley’s room.”

“Yes, there is,” Lotty said. “There’s Kate Lumley’s room.”

“I thought,” said Scrap to Mrs. Fisher, and it seemed to Briggs that he had never heard music till now, “your friend was expected immediately.”

“I thought,” said Scrap to Mrs. Fisher, and it seemed to Briggs that he had never heard music until now, “your friend was supposed to arrive right away.”

“Oh, no,” said Mrs. Fisher—with an odd placidness, Scrap thought.

“Oh, no,” said Mrs. Fisher—with a strange calmness, Scrap thought.

“Miss Lumley,” said Mr. Wilkins, “—or should I,” he inquired of Mrs. Fisher, “say Mrs.?”

“Miss Lumley,” Mr. Wilkins said, “—or should I,” he asked Mrs. Fisher, “say Mrs.?”

“Nobody has ever married Kate,” said Mrs. Fisher complacently.

“Nobody has ever married Kate,” Mrs. Fisher said smugly.

“Quite so. Miss Lumley does not arrive to-day in any case, Lady Caroline, and Mr. Briggs has—unfortunately, if I may say so—to continue his journey to-morrow, so that his staying would in no way interfere with Miss Lumley’s possible movements.”

“Exactly. Miss Lumley isn’t coming today anyway, Lady Caroline, and Mr. Briggs has—unfortunately, if I can say so— to continue his journey tomorrow, so his staying wouldn’t interfere with Miss Lumley’s possible plans.”

“Then of course I join in the invitation,” said Scrap, with what was to Briggs the most divine cordiality.

“Then of course I’ll join in the invitation,” said Scrap, with what seemed to Briggs the most wonderful warmth.

He stammered something, flushing scarlet, and Scrap thought, “Oh,” and turned her head away; but that merely made Briggs acquainted with her profile, and if there existed anything more lovely than Scrap’s full face it was her profile.

He stammered something, turning bright red, and Scrap thought, “Oh,” and turned her head away; but that just made Briggs notice her profile, and if there was anything more beautiful than Scrap’s full face, it was her profile.

Well, it was only for this one afternoon and evening. He would leave, no doubt, the first thing in the morning. It took hours to get to Rome. Awful if he hung on till the night train. She had a feeling that the principal express to Rome passed through at night. Why hadn’t that woman Kate Lumley arrived yet? She had forgotten all about her, but now she remembered she was to have been invited a fortnight ago. What had become of her? This man, once let in, would come and see her in London, would haunt the places she was likely to go to. He had the makings, her experienced eye could see, of a passionately persistent grabber.

Well, it was only for this one afternoon and evening. He would leave, no doubt, first thing in the morning. It took hours to get to Rome. It would be terrible if he waited for the night train. She had a feeling that the main express to Rome ran at night. Why hadn’t that woman, Kate Lumley, arrived yet? She had completely forgotten about her, but now remembered that she was supposed to have been invited two weeks ago. What happened to her? This man, once he was let in, would come and see her in London, would linger around the places she was likely to go. She could tell, with her experienced eye, that he had the traits of a passionately persistent pursuer.

“If,” thought Mr. Wilkins, observing Briggs’s face and sudden silence, “any understanding existed between this young fellow and Mrs. Arbuthnot, there is now going to be trouble. Trouble of a different nature from the kind I feared, in which Arbuthnot would have played a leading part, in fact the part of petitioner, but trouble that may need help and advice none the less for its not being publicly scandalous. Briggs, impelled by his passions and her beauty, will aspire to the daughter of the Droitwiches. She, naturally and properly, will repel him. Mrs. Arbuthnot, left in the cold, will be upset and show it. Arbuthnot on his arrival will find his wife in enigmatic tears. Inquiring into their cause, he will be met with an icy reserve. More trouble may then be expected, and in me they will seek and find their adviser. When Lotty said Mrs. Arbuthnot wanted her husband, she was wrong. What Mrs. Arbuthnot wants is Briggs, and it looks uncommonly as if she were not going to get him. Well, I’m their man.”

“If,” Mr. Wilkins thought, watching Briggs’s face and sudden silence, “if there's any connection between this young guy and Mrs. Arbuthnot, trouble is coming. Not the kind of trouble I worried about, where Arbuthnot would play a major role, actually as the one asking for help, but trouble that might still need support and advice since it's not public scandalous. Driven by his feelings and her beauty, Briggs will try to go after the daughter of the Droitwiches. Naturally, she will turn him down. Mrs. Arbuthnot, feeling left out, will get upset and show it. When Arbuthnot arrives, he’ll find his wife in mysterious tears. When he asks about it, he’ll get a cold response. More trouble is likely then, and they’ll look to me for advice. When Lotty said Mrs. Arbuthnot wanted her husband, she was mistaken. What Mrs. Arbuthnot really wants is Briggs, and it seems she’s not going to get him. Well, I’m their guy.”

“Where are your things, Mr. Briggs?” asked Mrs. Fisher, her voice round with motherliness. “Oughtn’t they to be fetched?” For the sun was nearly in the sea now, and the sweet-smelling April dampness that followed immediately on its disappearance was beginning to steal into the garden.

“Where are your things, Mr. Briggs?” asked Mrs. Fisher, her voice warm and nurturing. “Shouldn’t someone go get them?” The sun was almost down now, and the pleasant April dampness that came right after its setting was starting to creep into the garden.

Briggs started. “My things?” he repeated. “Oh yes—I must fetch them. They’re in Mezzago. I’ll send Domenico. My fly is waiting in the village. He can go back in it. I’ll go and tell him.”

Briggs started. “My stuff?” he repeated. “Oh right—I need to grab that. It’s in Mezzago. I’ll send Domenico. My plane is waiting in the village. He can take it back. I’ll go tell him.”

He got up. To whom was he talking? To Mrs. Fisher, ostensibly, yet his eyes were fixed on Scrap, who said nothing and looked at no one.

He stood up. Who was he talking to? Mrs. Fisher, apparently, but his gaze was locked on Scrap, who said nothing and didn’t look at anyone.

Then, recollecting himself, he stammered, “I’m awfully sorry—I keep on forgetting—I’ll go down and fetch them myself.”

Then, collecting himself, he stammered, “I’m really sorry—I keep forgetting—I’ll go down and get them myself.”

“We can easily send Domenico,” said Rose; and at her gentle voice he turned his head.

“We can easily send Domenico,” Rose said; and at her soft voice, he turned his head.

Why, there was his friend, the sweet-named lady—but how had she not in this short interval changed! Was it the failing light making her so colourless, so vague-featured, so dim, so much like a ghost? A nice good ghost, of course, and still with a pretty name, but only a ghost.

Why, there was his friend, the lovely-named lady—but how had she not changed at all in such a short time! Was it the fading light that made her look so pale, so indistinct, so dim, so much like a ghost? A nice ghost, of course, and still with a pretty name, but just a ghost.

He turned from her to Scrap again, and forgot Rose Arbuthnot’s existence. How was it possible for him to bother about anybody or anything else in this first moment of being face to face with his dream come true?

He turned away from her to Scrap again and completely forgot about Rose Arbuthnot. How could he think about anyone or anything else in this first moment of being face to face with his dream come true?

Briggs had not supposed or hoped that any one as beautiful as his dream of beauty existed. He had never till now met even an approximation. Pretty women, charming women by the score he had met and properly appreciated, but never the real, the godlike thing itself. He used to think, “If ever I saw a perfectly beautiful woman I should die”; and though, having now met what to his ideas was a perfectly beautiful woman, he did not die, he became very nearly as incapable of managing his own affairs as if he had.

Briggs never imagined or hoped that anyone as beautiful as his vision of beauty existed. Until now, he had never even come close to meeting such a person. He had encountered plenty of pretty and charming women and appreciated them, but never the true, godlike beauty he dreamed of. He used to think, “If I ever saw a perfectly beautiful woman, I would die,” and even though he now met what he considered to be a perfectly beautiful woman, he didn't die; he became almost as unable to manage his own affairs as if he had.

The others were obliged to arrange everything for him. By questions they extracted from him that his luggage was in the station cloakroom at Mezzago, and they sent for Domenico, and, urged and prompted by everybody except Scrap, who sat in silence and looked at no one, Briggs was induced to give him the necessary instructions for going back in the fly and bringing out his things.

The others had to take care of everything for him. Through questions, they got him to reveal that his luggage was in the station cloakroom at Mezzago, and they called Domenico. With everyone pushing him, except Scrap, who sat quietly and didn’t look at anyone, Briggs was convinced to give him the necessary instructions to go back in the cab and retrieve his things.

It was a sad sight to see the collapse of Briggs. Everybody noticed it, even Rose.

It was a tragic sight to witness Briggs falling apart. Everyone saw it, including Rose.

“Upon my word,” thought Mrs. Fisher, “the way one pretty face can turn a delightful man into an idiot is past all patience.”

“Honestly,” thought Mrs. Fisher, “it's unbelievable how one pretty face can make a charming man act like a complete fool.”

And feeling the air getting chilly, and the sight of the enthralled Briggs painful, she went in to order his room to be got ready, regretting now that she had pressed the poor boy to stay. She had forgotten Lady Caroline’s kill-joy face for the moment, and the more completely owing to the absence of any ill effects produced by it on Mr. Wilkins. Poor boy. Such a charming boy too, left to himself. It was true she could not accuse Lady Caroline of not leaving him to himself, for she was taking no notice of him at all, but that did not help. Exactly like foolish moths did men, in other respects intelligent, flutter round the impassive lighted candle of a pretty face. She had seen them doing it. She had looked on only too often. Almost she laid a motherly hand on Briggs’s fair head as she passed him. Poor boy.

Feeling the air getting chilly and seeing the captivated Briggs was painful for her, so she went inside to have his room prepared, regretting that she had convinced the poor boy to stay. In that moment, she forgot about Lady Caroline’s joyless expression, especially since it didn’t seem to affect Mr. Wilkins at all. Poor boy. Such a charming boy too, when he was on his own. It was true that she couldn’t fault Lady Caroline for not leaving him alone, since she was completely ignoring him, but that didn’t make it any better. Just like foolish moths, who are otherwise smart, flutter around the unbothered light of a pretty face, men do the same. She had seen it happen. She had watched it all too often. Almost, she reached out to place a motherly hand on Briggs’s fair head as she passed him. Poor boy.

Then Scrap, having finished her cigarette, got up and went indoors too. She saw no reason why she should sit there in order to gratify Mr. Briggs’s desire to stare. She would have liked to stay out longer, to go to her corner behind the daphne bushes and look at the sunset sky and watch the lights coming out one by one in the village below and smell the sweet moistness of the evening, but if she did Mr. Briggs would certainly follow her.

Then Scrap, finishing her cigarette, got up and went inside as well. She saw no reason to sit there just to satisfy Mr. Briggs’s need to stare. She would have liked to stay out longer, go to her spot behind the daphne bushes, watch the sunset sky, see the village lights coming on one by one, and breathe in the sweet, moist evening air, but if she did, Mr. Briggs would definitely follow her.

The old familiar tyranny had begun again. Her holiday of peace and liberation was interrupted—perhaps over, for who knew if he would go away, after all, to-morrow? He might leave the house, driven out of it by Kate Lumley, but there was nothing to prevent his taking rooms in the village and coming up every day. This tyranny of one person over another! And she was so miserably constructed that she wouldn’t even be able to frown him down without being misunderstood.

The familiar tyranny had started again. Her break of peace and freedom was interrupted—maybe it was over, since who knew if he would really leave tomorrow? He might leave the house, pushed out by Kate Lumley, but nothing would stop him from getting a room in the village and coming by every day. This power one person held over another! And she felt so poorly equipped that she wouldn’t even be able to frown at him without being misinterpreted.

Scrap, who loved this time of the evening in her corner, felt indignant with Mr. Briggs who was doing her out of it, and she turned her back on the garden and him and went towards the house without a look or a word. But Briggs, when he realised her intention, leapt to his feet, snatched chairs which were not in her way out of it, kicked a footstool which was not in her path on one side, hurried to the door, which stood wide open, in order to hold it open, and followed her through it, walking by her side along the hall.

Scrap, who loved this time of day in her corner, felt irritated with Mr. Briggs for ruining it for her, so she turned her back on the garden and him and walked towards the house without a glance or a word. But when Briggs realized what she was doing, he jumped to his feet, moved chairs that weren’t in her way out of it, kicked a footstool that wasn’t in her path to the side, rushed to the door, which was wide open, to hold it for her, and followed her through it, walking beside her down the hall.

What was to be done with Mr. Briggs? Well, it was his hall; she couldn’t prevent his walking along it.

What should be done about Mr. Briggs? Well, it was his hallway; she couldn’t stop him from walking down it.

“I hope,” he said, not able while walking to take his eyes off her, so that he knocked against several things he would otherwise have avoided—the corner of a bookcase, an ancient carved cupboard, the table with the flowers on it, shaking the water over—“that you are quite comfortable here? If you’re not I’ll—I’ll flay them alive.”

“I hope,” he said, unable to take his eyes off her while walking, which caused him to bump into several things he would normally avoid—the corner of a bookcase, an old carved cupboard, the table with the flowers on it, splashing the water everywhere—“that you’re feeling comfortable here? If you’re not, I’ll—I’ll make them pay.”

His voice vibrated. What was to be done with Mr. Briggs? She could of course stay in her room the whole time, say she was ill, not appear at dinner; but again, the tyranny of this . . .

His voice shook. What was she supposed to do about Mr. Briggs? She could definitely just stay in her room the entire time, claim she was sick, and skip dinner; but then again, the oppression of this...

“I’m very comfortable indeed,” said Scrap.

"I'm super comfortable," said Scrap.

“If I had dreamed you were coming—” he began.

“If I had known you were coming—” he began.

“It’s a wonderful old place,” said Scrap, doing her utmost to sound detached and forbidding, but with little hope of success.

“It’s a great old place,” said Scrap, trying hard to sound indifferent and intimidating, but not holding out much hope of succeeding.

The kitchen was on this floor, and passing its door, which was open a crack, they were observed by the servants, whose thoughts, communicated to each other by looks, may be roughly reproduced by such rude symbols as Aha and Oho—symbols which represented and included their appreciation of the inevitable, their foreknowledge of the inevitable, and their complete understanding and approval.

The kitchen was on this floor, and as they walked past its slightly open door, the servants noticed them. Their thoughts, shared with each other through glances, could be roughly summed up with expressions like Aha and Oho—symbols that captured their recognition of what was about to happen, their anticipation of it, and their full understanding and approval.

“Are you going upstairs?” asked Briggs, as she paused at the foot of them.

“Are you going upstairs?” Briggs asked as she stopped at the bottom of the stairs.

“Yes.”

"Yep."

“Which room do you sit in? The drawing-room, or the small yellow room?”

“Which room do you hang out in? The living room or the small yellow room?”

“In my own room.”

"In my own space."

So then he couldn’t go up with her; so then all he could do was to wait till she came out again.

So, he couldn't go up with her; all he could do was wait until she came out again.

He longed to ask her which was her own room—it thrilled him to hear her call any room in his house her own room—that he might picture her in it. He longed to know if by any happy chance it was his room, for ever after to be filled with her wonder; but he didn’t dare. He would find that out later from some one else—Francesca, anybody.

He wanted to ask her which room was hers—it excited him to hear her refer to any room in his house as her own—that he could imagine her in it. He was curious to know if, by some fortunate chance, it was his room, forever filled with her amazement; but he didn’t dare. He would find out later from someone else—Francesca, anyone.

“Then I shan’t see you again till dinner?”

“Then I won’t see you again until dinner?”

“Dinner is at eight,” was Scrap’s evasive answer as she went upstairs.

“Dinner is at eight,” Scrap replied vaguely as she headed upstairs.

He watched her go.

He watched her leave.

She passed the Madonna, the portrait of Rose Arbuthnot, and the dark-eyed figure he had thought so sweet seemed to turn pale, to shrivel into insignificance as she passed.

She walked by the Madonna, the portrait of Rose Arbuthnot, and the dark-eyed figure he had once thought was so charming seemed to lose its color, shrinking into something unimportant as she went by.

She turned the bend of the stairs, and the setting sun, shining through the west window a moment on her face, turned her to glory.

She reached the corner of the stairs, and the setting sun, streaming through the west window for a moment on her face, made her look radiant.

She disappeared, and the sun went out too, and the stairs were dark and empty.

She vanished, and the sun went dark as well, leaving the stairs shadowy and deserted.

He listened till her footsteps were silent, trying to tell from the sound of the shutting door which room she had gone into, then wandered aimlessly away through the hall again, and found himself back in the top garden.

He listened until her footsteps faded away, trying to figure out from the sound of the closing door which room she had entered, then aimlessly wandered back through the hall and found himself in the upper garden again.

Scrap from her window saw him there. She saw Lotty and Rose sitting on the end parapet, where she would have liked to have been, and she saw Mr. Wilkins buttonholing Briggs and evidently telling him the story of the oleander tree in the middle of the garden.

Scrap from her window spotted him there. She saw Lotty and Rose sitting on the end of the parapet, where she would have liked to be, and she saw Mr. Wilkins cornering Briggs and clearly telling him the story of the oleander tree in the middle of the garden.

Briggs was listening with a patience she thought rather nice, seeing that it was his oleander and his own father’s story. She knew Mr. Wilkins was telling him the story by his gestures. Domenico had told it her soon after her arrival, and he had also told Mrs. Fisher, who had told Mr. Wilkins. Mrs. Fisher thought highly of this story, and often spoke of it. It was about a cherrywood walking-stick. Briggs’s father had thrust this stick into the ground at that spot, and said to Domenico’s father, who was then the gardener, “Here we will have an oleander.” And Briggs’s father left the stick in the ground as a reminder to Domenico’s father, and presently—how long afterwards nobody remembered—the stick began to sprout, and it was an oleander.

Briggs was listening patiently, which she thought was nice, considering it was his oleander and his father's story. She could tell Mr. Wilkins was sharing the tale through his gestures. Domenico had told her the story soon after she arrived, and he had also shared it with Mrs. Fisher, who then told Mr. Wilkins. Mrs. Fisher thought highly of this story and often mentioned it. It was about a cherrywood walking stick. Briggs's father had stuck this stick into the ground at that spot and said to Domenico's father, who was the gardener at the time, “Here we will have an oleander.” Briggs's father left the stick in the ground as a reminder for Domenico's father, and eventually—no one could remember how long later—the stick began to sprout, and it became an oleander.

There stood poor Mr. Briggs being told all about it, and listening to the story he must have known from infancy with patience.

There stood poor Mr. Briggs, being told all about it and listening to the story he must have known since childhood with patience.

Probably he was thinking of something else. She was afraid he was. How unfortunate, how extremely unfortunate, the determination that seized people to get hold of and engulf other people. If only they could be induced to stand more on their own feet. Why couldn’t Mr. Briggs be more like Lotty, who never wanted anything of anybody, but was complete in herself and respected other people’s completeness? One loved being with Lotty. With her one was free, and yet befriended. Mr. Briggs looked so really nice, too. She thought she might like him if only he wouldn’t so excessively like her.

He was probably thinking about something else. She was worried that he was. How unfortunate, how really unfortunate, the way some people feel the need to dominate and consume others. If only they could be encouraged to be more self-sufficient. Why couldn’t Mr. Briggs be more like Lotty, who never wanted anything from anyone and was whole on her own while also respecting others’ wholeness? Spending time with Lotty was enjoyable. With her, you felt free, yet still connected. Mr. Briggs seemed really nice, too. She thought she might like him if he wouldn’t seem so overly drawn to her.

Scrap felt melancholy. Here she was shut up in her bedroom, which was stuffy from the afternoon sun that had been pouring into it, instead of out in the cool garden, and all because of Mr. Briggs.

Scrap felt sad. Here she was locked in her bedroom, which was uncomfortable from the afternoon sun streaming in, instead of outside in the cool garden, all because of Mr. Briggs.

Intolerable tyranny, she thought, flaring up. She wouldn’t endure it; she would go out all the same; she would run downstairs while Mr. Wilkins—really that man was a treasure—held Mr. Briggs down telling him about the oleander, and get out of the house by the front door, and take cover in the shadows of the zigzag path. Nobody could see her there; nobody would think of looking for her there.

Intolerable tyranny, she thought, feeling a surge of anger. She wouldn’t put up with it; she was going out anyway; she’d dash downstairs while Mr. Wilkins—he really was a gem—kept Mr. Briggs busy talking about the oleander. She would sneak out the front door and hide in the shadows of the winding path. No one could see her there; no one would think to look for her there.

She snatched up a wrap, for she did not mean to come back for a long while, perhaps not even to dinner—it would be all Mr. Briggs’s fault if she went dinnerless and hungry—and with another glance out of the window to see if she were still safe, she stole out and got away to the sheltering trees of the zigzag path, and there sat down on one of the seats placed at each bend to assist the upward journey of those who were breathless.

She grabbed a wrap because she didn’t plan to return for a long time, maybe not even for dinner—it would be all Mr. Briggs’s fault if she ended up missing dinner and feeling hungry. With one last look out the window to make sure she was still safe, she slipped out and made her way to the protective trees along the winding path, where she sat down on one of the benches placed at each turn to help those who were out of breath.

Ah, this was lovely, thought Scrap with a sigh of relief. How cool. How good it smelt. She could see the quiet water of the little harbour through the pine trunks, and the lights coming out in the houses on the other side, and all round her the green dusk was splashed by the rose-pink of the gladioluses in the grass and the white of the crowding daisies.

Ah, this was wonderful, thought Scrap with a sigh of relief. How refreshing. How nice it smelled. She could see the calm water of the small harbor through the pine trees, the lights turning on in the houses across the way, and all around her the green twilight was dotted with the rose-pink of the gladioluses in the grass and the white of the blooming daisies.

Ah, this was lovely. So still. Nothing moving—not a leaf, not a stalk. The only sound was a dog barking, far away somewhere up on the hills, or when the door of the little restaurant in the piazza below was opened and there was a burst of voices, silenced again immediately by the swinging to of the door.

Ah, this was beautiful. So quiet. Nothing was moving—not a leaf, not a stem. The only sound was a dog barking, far away up in the hills, or when the door of the little restaurant in the square below opened and there was a rush of voices, quickly silenced again as the door swung shut.

She drew in a deep breath of pleasure. Ah, this was—

She took a deep breath of satisfaction. Ah, this was—

Her deep breath was arrested in the middle. What was that?

Her breath caught in her throat. What was that?

She leaned forward listening, her body tense.

She leaned forward, listening, her body tense.

Footsteps. On the zigzag path. Briggs. Finding her out.

Footsteps. On the winding path. Briggs. Discovering her.

Should she run?

Should she go for it?

No—the footsteps were coming up, not down. Some one from the village. Perhaps Angelo, with provisions.

No—the footsteps were coming up, not down. Someone from the village. Maybe Angelo, with supplies.

She relaxed again. But the steps were not the steps of Angelo, that swift and springy youth; they were slow and considered, and they kept on pausing.

She relaxed again. But the steps weren't those of Angelo, that energetic and bouncy young man; they were slow and deliberate, and they kept stopping.

“Some one who isn’t used to hills,” thought Scrap.

“Someone who isn’t used to hills,” thought Scrap.

The idea of going back to the house did not occur to her. She was afraid of nothing in life except love. Brigands or murderers as such held no terrors for the daughter of the Droitwiches; she only would have been afraid of them if they left off being brigands and murderers and began instead to try and make love.

The thought of going back to the house didn’t cross her mind. She was scared of nothing in life except for love. Thieves or killers didn’t frighten the daughter of the Droitwiches; she would only have been afraid of them if they stopped being thieves and killers and started trying to make love instead.

The next moment the footsteps turned the corner of her bit of path, and stood still.

The next moment, the footsteps rounded the corner of her small path and then paused.

“Getting his wind,” thought Scrap, not looking round.

“Catching his breath,” thought Scrap, not turning around.

Then as he—from the sounds of the steps she took them to belong to a man—did not move, she turned her head, and beheld with astonishment a person she had seen a good deal of lately in London, the well-known writer of amusing memoirs, Mr. Ferdinand Arundel.

Then, since he—judging by the sound of the footsteps, which she assumed belonged to a man—did not move, she turned her head and was astonished to see someone she recognized from having seen him often lately in London, the famous writer of humorous memoirs, Mr. Ferdinand Arundel.

She stared. Nothing in the way of being followed surprised her any more, but that he should have discovered where she was surprised her. Her mother had promised faithfully to tell no one.

She stared. Nothing about being followed surprised her anymore, but the fact that he had figured out where she was caught her off guard. Her mother had promised faithfully not to tell anyone.

“You?” she said, feeling betrayed. “Here?”

“You?” she said, feeling betrayed. “Here?”

He came up to her and took off his hat. His forehead beneath the hat was wet with the beads of unaccustomed climbing. He looked ashamed and entreating, like a guilty but devoted dog.

He approached her and removed his hat. His forehead under the hat was damp with the sweat from unusual climbing. He looked embarrassed and pleading, like a remorseful but loyal dog.

“You must forgive me,” he said. “Lady Droitwich told me where you were, and as I happened to be passing through on my way to Rome I thought I would get out at Mezzago and just look in and see how you were.”

“You have to forgive me,” he said. “Lady Droitwich told me where you were, and since I happened to be passing through on my way to Rome, I thought I’d stop in Mezzago and check on you.”

“But—didn’t my mother tell you I was doing a rest-cure?”

“But—didn't my mom tell you I was on a rest cure?”

“Yes. She did. And that’s why I haven’t intruded on you earlier in the day. I thought you would probably sleep all day, and wake up about now so as to be fed.”

“Yes. She did. And that’s why I haven’t bothered you earlier today. I figured you would probably sleep all day and wake up around now to eat.”

“But—”

“But—”

“I know. I’ve got nothing to say in excuse. I couldn’t help myself.”

“I know. I have no excuse. I couldn’t control myself.”

“This,” thought Scrap, “comes of mother insisting on having authors to lunch, and me being so much more amiable in appearance than I really am.”

“This,” thought Scrap, “is what happens when my mom insists on having writers over for lunch, and I look way friendlier than I actually am.”

She had been amiable to Ferdinand Arundel; she liked him—or rather she did not dislike him. He seemed a jovial, simple man, and had the eyes of a nice dog. Also, though it was evident that he admired her, he had not in London grabbed. There he had merely been a good-natured, harmless person of entertaining conversation, who helped to make luncheons agreeable. Now it appeared that he too was a grabber. Fancy following her out there—daring to. Nobody else had. Perhaps her mother had given him the address because she considered him so absolutely harmless, and thought he might be useful and see her home.

She had been friendly to Ferdinand Arundel; she liked him—or rather, she didn’t dislike him. He seemed like a cheerful, straightforward guy, and he had the eyes of a friendly dog. Also, although it was clear that he admired her, he hadn’t made any moves in London. There, he had just been a good-natured, harmless person with entertaining conversation, who helped make luncheons enjoyable. Now it seemed he was also trying to make a move. Can you believe he followed her out here—how bold! No one else had done that. Maybe her mom had given him the address because she thought he was completely harmless and figured he could be helpful and see her home.

Well, whatever he was he couldn’t possibly give her the trouble an active young man like Mr. Briggs might give her. Mr. Briggs, infatuated, would be reckless, she felt, would stick at nothing, would lose his head publicly. She could imagine Mr. Briggs doing things with rope-ladders, and singing all night under her window—being really difficult and uncomfortable. Mr. Arundel hadn’t the figure for any kind of recklessness. He had lived too long and too well. She was sure he couldn’t sing, and wouldn’t want to. He must be at least forty. How many good dinners could not a man have eaten by the time he was forty? And if during that time instead of taking exercise he had sat writing books, he would quite naturally acquire the figure Mr. Arundel had in fact acquired—the figure rather for conversation than adventure.

Well, whatever he was, he couldn’t possibly cause her the trouble that an energetic young man like Mr. Briggs might cause her. Mr. Briggs, being infatuated, would be reckless, she felt, would do anything, and would lose his composure in public. She could picture Mr. Briggs doing things with rope ladders and singing all night outside her window—being really demanding and annoying. Mr. Arundel didn’t have the type for any kind of recklessness. He had lived too long and too well. She was sure he couldn’t sing and wouldn’t want to. He must be at least forty. How many good dinners could a man have had by the time he was forty? And if during that time, instead of exercising, he had spent his time writing books, he would naturally develop the figure Mr. Arundel actually had—the kind more suited for conversation than adventure.

Scrap, who had become melancholy at the sight of Briggs, became philosophical at the sight of Arundel. Here he was. She couldn’t send him away till after dinner. He must be nourished.

Scrap, who had grown sad at the sight of Briggs, became reflective at the sight of Arundel. Here he was. She couldn’t ask him to leave until after dinner. He needed to be fed.

This being so, she had better make the best of it, and do that with a good grace which anyhow wasn’t to be avoided. Besides, he would be a temporary shelter from Mr. Briggs. She was at least acquainted with Ferdinand Arundel, and could hear news from him of her mother and her friends, and such talk would put up a defensive barrier at dinner between herself and the approaches of the other one. And it was only for one dinner, and he couldn’t eat her.

This being the case, she might as well make the most of it and do so with some grace, which she couldn't really avoid anyway. Plus, he would be a temporary refuge from Mr. Briggs. At least she knew Ferdinand Arundel and could get updates about her mother and her friends, and that kind of conversation would create a buffer at dinner between her and the advances of the other person. And it was just one dinner, and he couldn't eat her.

She therefore prepared herself for friendliness. “I’m to be fed,” she said, ignoring his last remark, “at eight, and you must come up and be fed too. Sit down and get cool and tell me how everybody is.”

She got ready to be friendly. “I’m getting dinner,” she said, ignoring his last comment, “at eight, so you have to come up and eat too. Sit down, relax, and let me know how everyone is.”

“May I really dine with you? In these travelling things?” he said, wiping his forehead before sitting down beside her.

“Can I really have dinner with you? With all this travel stuff?” he said, wiping his forehead before sitting down next to her.

She was too lovely to be true, he thought. Just to look at her for an hour, just to hear her voice, was enough reward for his journey and his fears.

She was too beautiful to be real, he thought. Just spending an hour looking at her, just hearing her voice, was enough compensation for his journey and his fears.

“Of course. I suppose you’ve left your fly in the village, and will be going on from Mezzago by the night train.”

“Of course. I guess you left your suitcase in the village and will be taking the night train from Mezzago.”

“Or stay in Mezzago in an hotel and go on to-morrow. But tell me,” he said, gazing at the adorable profile, “about yourself. London has been extraordinarily dull and empty. Lady Droitwich said you were with people here she didn’t know. I hope they’ve been kind to you? You look—well, as if your cure had done everything a cure should.”

“Or stay in Mezzago at a hotel and leave tomorrow. But tell me,” he said, looking at her lovely profile, “about yourself. London has been really boring and empty. Lady Droitwich mentioned you were with people here she didn’t recognize. I hope they’ve been nice to you? You look—well, as if your treatment has worked perfectly.”

“They’ve been very kind,” said Scrap. “I got them out of an advertisement.”

“They've been really nice,” Scrap said. “I found them through an ad.”

“An advertisement?”

“An ad?”

“It’s a good way, I find, to get friends. I’m fonder of one of these than I’ve been of anybody in years.”

“It’s a great way to make friends, I think. I care more about one of these than I have about anyone in years.”

“Really? Who is it?”

“Really? Who's that?”

“You shall guess which of them it is when you see them. Tell me about mother. When did you see her last? We arranged not to write to each other unless there was something special. I wanted to have a month that was perfectly blank.”

“You'll figure out who it is when you see them. Tell me about Mom. When did you last see her? We agreed not to write to each other unless something important came up. I wanted to have a month that was completely empty.”

“And now I’ve come and interrupted. I can’t tell you how ashamed I am—both of having done it and of not having been able to help it.”

“And now I’ve shown up and interrupted. I can’t express how embarrassed I am—both for having done it and for not being able to avoid it.”

“Oh, but,” said Scrap quickly, for he could not have come on a better day, when up there waiting and watching for her was, she knew, the enamoured Briggs, “I’m really very glad indeed to see you. Tell me about mother.”

“Oh, but,” Scrap said quickly, because he couldn't have picked a better day, especially since the smitten Briggs was up there waiting and watching for her, “I’m really very glad to see you. Tell me about mom.”

Chapter 20

Scrap wanted to know so much about her mother that Arundel had presently to invent. He would talk about anything she wished if only he might be with her for a while and see her and hear her, but he knew very little of the Droitwiches and their friends really—beyond meeting them at those bigger functions where literature is also represented, and amusing them at luncheons and dinners, he knew very little of them really. To them he had always remained Mr. Arundel; no one called him Ferdinand; and he only knew the gossip also available to the evening papers and the frequenters of clubs. But he was, however, good at inventing; and as soon as he had come to an end of first-hand knowledge, in order to answer her inquiries and keep her there to himself he proceeded to invent. It was quite easy to fasten some of the entertaining things he was constantly thinking on to other people and pretend they were theirs. Scrap, who had that affection for her parents which warms in absence, was athirst for news, and became more and more interested by the news he gradually imparted.

Scrap wanted to know so much about her mom that Arundel had to make things up on the spot. He would talk about anything she wanted, just so he could be with her for a bit and see her and hear her, but he really didn’t know much about the Droitwiches and their friends—other than running into them at those larger events where literature was also part of the scene, and entertaining them at lunches and dinners, he didn’t really know them at all. To them, he had always been Mr. Arundel; no one called him Ferdinand; and the only gossip he picked up was what he read in the evening papers or overheard at clubs. Still, he was good at inventing stories; and as soon as he ran out of firsthand info, he started making things up to answer her questions and keep her around for himself. It was pretty easy to attach some of the entertaining thoughts he was constantly having to other people and pretend they belonged to them. Scrap, who felt a warmth for her parents that grew in their absence, was eager for news and became increasingly interested in what he gradually shared.

At first it was ordinary news. He had met her mother here, and seen her there. She looked very well; she said so and so. But presently the things Lady Droitwich had said took on an unusual quality: they became amusing.

At first, it was just regular news. He had met her mom here and seen her there. She looked great; she mentioned this and that. But soon, the things Lady Droitwich had said started to feel different: they became funny.

“Mother said that?” Scrap interrupted, surprised.

“Mom said that?” Scrap interrupted, surprised.

And presently Lady Droitwich began to do amusing things as well as say them.

And soon Lady Droitwich started to do funny things along with saying them.

Mother did that?” Scrap inquired, wide-eyed.

Mom did that?” Scrap inquired, wide-eyed.

Arundel warmed to his work. He fathered some of the most entertaining ideas he had lately had on to Lady Droitwich, and also any charming funny things that had been done—or might have been done, for he could imagine almost anything.

Arundel got into the groove of his work. He shared some of the most entertaining ideas he had recently come up with to Lady Droitwich, along with any charmingly funny things that had happened—or could have happened, since he could imagine just about anything.

Scrap’s eyes grew round with wonder and affectionate pride in her mother. Why, but how funny—fancy mother. What an old darling. Did she really do that? How perfectly adorable of her. And did she really say—but how wonderful of her to think of it. What sort of a face did Lloyd George make?

Scrap's eyes widened with amazement and a warm sense of pride in her mother. Wow, how funny—what a creative mom. What a sweetheart. Did she really do that? How completely adorable of her. And did she really say—but it was so great of her to think of it. What kind of expression did Lloyd George have?

She laughed and laughed, and had a great longing to hug her mother, and the time flew, and it grew quite dusk, and it grew nearly dark, and Mr. Arundel still went on amusing her, and it was a quarter to eight before she suddenly remembered dinner.

She laughed and laughed, feeling a strong desire to hug her mom. Time flew by, it got pretty dark outside, and Mr. Arundel kept entertaining her. It wasn't until a quarter to eight that she suddenly remembered dinner.

“Oh, good heavens!” she exclaimed, jumping up.

“Oh my goodness!” she said, jumping up.

“Yes. It’s late,” said Arundel.

“Yes. It’s late,” Arundel said.

“I’ll go on quickly and send the maid to you. I must run, or I’ll never be ready in time—”

“I’ll hurry and send the maid to you. I need to go, or I won’t be ready on time—”

And she was gone up the path with the swiftness of a young, slender deer.

And she disappeared up the path as quickly as a young, slender deer.

Arundel followed. He did not wish to arrive too hot, so had to go slowly. Fortunately he was near the top, and Francesca came down the pergola to pilot him indoors, and having shown him where he could wash she put him in the empty drawing-room to cool himself by the crackling wood fire.

Arundel followed. He didn’t want to show up too sweaty, so he took his time. Luckily, he was close to the top, and Francesca came down the pergola to lead him inside. After showing him where he could wash up, she left him in the empty drawing room to cool off by the crackling wood fire.

He got as far away from the fire as he could, and stood in one of the deep window-recesses looking out at the distant lights of Mezzago. The drawing-room door was open, and the house was quiet with the hush that precedes dinner, when the inhabitants are all shut up in their rooms dressing. Briggs in his room was throwing away spoilt tie after spoilt tie; Scrap in hers was hurrying into a black frock with a vague notion that Mr. Briggs wouldn’t be able to see her so clearly in black; Mrs. Fisher was fastening the lace shawl, which nightly transformed her day dress into her evening dress, with the brooch Ruskin had given her on her marriage, formed of two pearl lilies tied together by a blue enamel ribbon on which was written in gold letters Esto perpetua; Mr. Wilkins was sitting on the edge of his bed brushing his wife’s hair—thus far in this third week had he progressed in demonstrativeness—while she, for her part, sitting on a chair in front of him, put his studs in a clean shirt; and Rose, ready dressed, sat at her window considering her day.

He moved as far from the fire as he could and stood in one of the deep window recesses, looking out at the distant lights of Mezzago. The drawing-room door was open, and the house was quiet with the stillness that comes before dinner, when everyone is shut up in their rooms getting ready. Briggs was in his room tossing out spoiled ties; Scrap was in hers hurriedly putting on a black dress, vaguely thinking that Mr. Briggs wouldn’t be able to see her as clearly in black; Mrs. Fisher was fastening the lace shawl that transformed her day dress into her evening dress, using the brooch Ruskin had given her on her wedding day, which was made of two pearl lilies tied together by a blue enamel ribbon that had “Esto perpetua” written in gold letters; Mr. Wilkins sat on the edge of his bed brushing his wife’s hair—this was as far as he had progressed in showing affection in this third week—while she, sitting in front of him, was putting his studs into a clean shirt; and Rose, already dressed, sat at her window reflecting on her day.

Rose was quite aware of what had happened to Mr. Briggs. If she had had any difficulty about it, Lotty would have removed it by the frank comments she made while she and Rose sat together after tea on the wall. Lotty was delighted at more love being introduced into San Salvatore, even if it were only one-sided, and said that when once Rose’s husband was there she didn’t suppose, now that Mrs. Fisher too had at last come unglued—Rose protested at the expression, and Lotty retorted that it was in Keats—there would be another place in the world more swarming with happiness than San Salvatore.

Rose was well aware of what had happened to Mr. Briggs. If she had any confusion about it, Lotty would have cleared it up with her frank comments while they sat together on the wall after tea. Lotty was thrilled about more love coming to San Salvatore, even if it was just one-sided, and she said that once Rose’s husband showed up, she didn’t think, especially now that Mrs. Fisher had finally lost it—Rose protested against that wording, and Lotty shot back that it was from Keats—there would be another place in the world more filled with happiness than San Salvatore.

“Your husband,” said Lotty, swinging her feet, “might be here quite soon, perhaps to-morrow evening if he starts at once, and there’ll be a glorious final few days before we all go home refreshed for life. I don’t believe any of us will ever be the same again—and I wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Caroline doesn’t end by getting fond of the young man Briggs. It’s in the air. You have to get fond of people here.”

“Your husband,” said Lotty, swinging her feet, “might be here pretty soon, maybe tomorrow evening if he leaves right away, and we’ll have an amazing final few days before we all head home feeling rejuvenated. I don’t think any of us will ever be the same again—and I wouldn't be surprised if Caroline ends up getting attached to the young guy Briggs. It’s in the air. You have to get attached to people here.”

Rose sat at her window thinking of these things. Lotty’s optimism . . . yet it had been justified by Mr. Wilkins; and look, too, at Mrs. Fisher. If only it would come true as well about Frederick! For Rose, who between lunch and tea had left off thinking about Frederick, was now, between tea and dinner, thinking of him harder than ever.

Rose sat at her window thinking about all this. Lotty’s optimism... but it had been validated by Mr. Wilkins; and just look at Mrs. Fisher. If only the same could happen with Frederick! For Rose, who had stopped thinking about Frederick between lunch and tea, was now, between tea and dinner, thinking about him more than ever.

It had been funny and delightful, that little interlude of admiration, but of course it couldn’t go on once Caroline appeared. Rose knew her place. She could see as well as any one the unusual, the unique loveliness of Lady Caroline. How warm, though, things like admiration and appreciation made one feel, how capable of really deserving them, how different, how glowing. They seemed to quicken unsuspected faculties into life. She was sure she had been a thoroughly amusing woman between lunch and tea, and a pretty one too. She was quite certain she had been pretty; she saw it in Mr. Briggs’s eyes as clearly as in a looking-glass. For a brief space, she thought, she had been like a torpid fly brought back to gay buzzing by the lighting of a fire in a wintry room. She still buzzed, she still tingled, just at the remembrance. What fun it had been, having an admirer even for that little while. No wonder people liked admirers. They seemed, in some strange way, to make one come alive.

It had been funny and delightful, that little moment of admiration, but of course it couldn’t last once Caroline showed up. Rose knew her place. She could see just as well as anyone else the unusual, unique beauty of Lady Caroline. How warm admiration and appreciation made someone feel, how deserving they could seem, how different and shining. They seemed to awaken hidden talents. She was sure she had been a thoroughly entertaining woman between lunch and tea, and a pretty one too. She was certain she had been pretty; she could see it in Mr. Briggs’s eyes just as clearly as in a mirror. For a brief moment, she thought, she had been like a sluggish fly brought back to buzzing joy by the warmth of a fire in a chilly room. She still buzzed, she still tingled, just from the memory. What fun it had been to have an admirer, even for a little while. No wonder people liked admirers. They seemed, in some strange way, to make a person come alive.

Although it was all over she still glowed with it and felt more exhilarated, more optimistic, more as Lotty probably constantly felt, than she had done since she was a girl. She dressed with care, though she knew Mr. Briggs would no longer see her, but it gave her pleasure to see how pretty, while she was about it, she could make herself look; and very nearly she stuck a crimson camellia in her hair down by her ear. She did hold it there for a minute, and it looked almost sinfully attractive and was exactly the colour of her mouth, but she took it out again with a smile and a sigh and put it in the proper place for flowers, which is water. She mustn’t be silly, she thought. Think of the poor. Soon she would be back with them again, and what would a camellia behind her ear seem like then? Simply fantastic.

Although it was all over, she still radiated joy and felt more exhilarated, more optimistic, and probably felt like Lotty always did, than she had since she was a girl. She dressed thoughtfully, even though she knew Mr. Briggs wouldn’t see her again, but it pleased her to see how pretty she could make herself look while doing it; she almost placed a crimson camellia in her hair near her ear. She held it there for a minute and it looked almost irresistibly attractive and was the exact color of her lips, but she took it out again with a smile and a sigh and put it in the proper place for flowers, which is water. She shouldn’t be silly, she thought. Think of the poor. Soon she would be back with them again, and what would a camellia behind her ear seem like then? Just ridiculous.

But on one thing she was determined: the first thing she would do when she got home would be to have it out with Frederick. If he didn’t come to San Salvatore that is what she would do—the very first thing. Long ago she ought to have done this, but always she had been handicapped, when she tried to, by being so dreadfully fond of him and so much afraid that fresh wounds were going to be given her wretched, soft heart. But now let him wound her as much as he chose, as much as he possibly could, she would still have it out with him. Not that he ever intentionally wounded her; she knew he never meant to, she knew he often had no idea of having done it. For a person who wrote books, thought Rose, Frederick didn’t seem to have much imagination. Anyhow, she said to herself, getting up from the dressing-table, things couldn’t go on like this. She would have it out with him. This separate life, this freezing loneliness, she had had enough of it. Why shouldn’t she too be happy? Why on earth—the energetic expression matched her mood of rebelliousness—shouldn’t she too be loved and allowed to love?

But one thing she was determined about: the first thing she would do when she got home would be to confront Frederick. If he didn’t come to San Salvatore, that’s exactly what she would do—the very first thing. She should have done this a long time ago, but she had always been held back by how much she cared for him and her fear that he would hurt her already tender heart even more. But now, let him hurt her as much as he wanted, as much as he possibly could; she would still confront him. Not that he ever meant to hurt her; she knew he never intended to, and often he had no idea he had done it. For someone who wrote books, Rose thought, Frederick didn’t seem to have much imagination. Anyway, she told herself, getting up from the dressing-table, things couldn’t continue like this. She would confront him. This separate life, this chilling loneliness, she had enough of it. Why shouldn’t she be happy too? Why on earth—her energetic expression matched her mood of defiance—shouldn’t she be loved and allowed to love?

She looked at her little clock. Still ten minutes before dinner. Tired of staying in her bedroom she thought she would go on to Mrs. Fisher’s battlements, which would be empty at this hour, and watch the moon rise out of the sea.

She glanced at her small clock. Still ten minutes until dinner. Tired of being in her bedroom, she decided to head to Mrs. Fisher’s battlements, which would be empty at this time, and watch the moon rise over the sea.

She went into the deserted upper hall with this intention, but was attracted on her way along it by the firelight shining through the open door of the drawing-room.

She entered the empty upper hall with this intention, but was drawn in by the firelight coming through the open door of the living room.

How gay it looked. The fire transformed the room. A dark, ugly room in the daytime, it was transformed just as she had been transformed by the warmth of—no, she wouldn’t be silly; she would think of the poor; the thought of them always brought her down to sobriety at once.

How cheerful it looked. The fire changed the room. A dark, ugly room during the day, it was changed just like she had been changed by the warmth of—no, she wouldn’t be foolish; she would think of the less fortunate; the thought of them always brought her back to reality immediately.

She peeped in. Firelight and flowers; and outside the deep slits of windows hung the blue curtain of the night. How pretty. What a sweet place San Salvatore was. And that gorgeous lilac on the table—she must go and put her face in it . . .

She looked in. The fire was glowing and there were flowers; outside, the dark night hung like a blue curtain through the narrow windows. How beautiful. What a lovely place San Salvatore was. And that stunning lilac on the table—she had to go and bury her face in it . . .

But she never got to the lilac. She went one step towards it, and then stood still, for she had seen the figure looking out of the window in the farthest corner, and it was Frederick.

But she never reached the lilac. She took a step toward it, then stopped, because she had seen the figure looking out of the window in the farthest corner, and it was Frederick.

All the blood in Rose’s body rushed to her heart and seemed to stop its beating.

All the blood in Rose’s body rushed to her heart and felt like it stopped beating.

Frederick. Come.

Frederick, come here.

She stood quite still. He had not heard her. He did not turn round. She stood looking at him. The miracle had happened, and he had come.

She stood completely still. He hadn't heard her. He didn't turn around. She stood watching him. The miracle had happened, and he was here.

She stood holding her breath. So he needed her, for he had come instantly. So he too must have been thinking, longing . . .

She stood there, holding her breath. So he did need her, since he had come right away. He must have been thinking and longing too . . .

Her heart, which had seemed to stop beating, was suffocating her now, the way it raced along. Frederick did love her then—he must love her, or why had he come? Something, perhaps her absence, had made him turn to her, want her . . . and now the understanding she had made up her mind to have with him would be quite—would be quite—easy—

Her heart, which had felt like it stopped, was now suffocating her as it raced. Frederick did love her—he had to love her, or why would he be here? Something, maybe her absence, had made him seek her out, desire her . . . and now the connection she had decided to pursue with him would be—would be—easy—

Her thoughts wouldn’t go on. Her mind stammered. She couldn’t think. She could only see and feel. She didn’t know how it had happened. It was a miracle. God could do miracles. God had done this one. God could—God could—could—

Her thoughts wouldn’t flow. Her mind stumbled. She couldn’t think. She could only see and feel. She didn’t know how it had happened. It was a miracle. God could perform miracles. God had done this one. God could—God could—could—

Her mind stammered again, and broke off.

Her mind stumbled again and stopped.

“Frederick—” she tried to say; but no sound came, or if it did the crackling of the fire covered it up.

“Frederick—” she tried to say; but no sound came, or if it did the crackling of the fire drowned it out.

She must go nearer. She began to creep towards him—softly, softly.

She has to get closer. She started to move toward him—quietly, quietly.

He did not move. He had not heard.

He didn't move. He hadn't heard.

She stole nearer and nearer, and the fire crackled and he heard nothing.

She crept closer and closer, the fire crackling softly, and he couldn’t hear anything.

She stopped a moment, unable to breathe. She was afraid. Suppose he—suppose he—oh, but he had come, he had come.

She paused for a moment, struggling to catch her breath. She felt scared. What if he—what if he—oh, but he was here, he was here.

She went on again, close up to him, and her heart beat so loud that she thought he must hear it. And couldn’t he feel—didn’t he know—

She moved in closer to him, and her heart raced so loudly that she thought he must be able to hear it. And couldn’t he sense it—didn’t he realize—

“Frederick,” she whispered, hardly able even to whisper, choked by the beating of her heart.

“Frederick,” she whispered, barely able to make a sound, overwhelmed by her racing heart.

He spun round on his heels.

He turned around on his heels.

“Rose!” he exclaimed, staring blankly.

“Rose!” he exclaimed, staring blankly.

But she did not see his stare, for her arms were round his neck, and her cheek was against his, and she was murmuring, her lips on his ear, “I knew you would come—in my very heart I always, always knew you would come—”

But she didn't notice his gaze, because her arms were wrapped around his neck, her cheek was pressed against his, and she was softly murmuring, her lips near his ear, “I knew you would come—in my heart I always, always knew you would come—”

Chapter 21

Now Frederick was not the man to hurt anything if he could help it; besides, he was completely bewildered. Not only was his wife here—here, of all places in the world—but she was clinging to him as she had not clung for years, and murmuring love, and welcoming him. If she welcomed him she must have been expecting him. Strange as this was, it was the only thing in the situation which was evident—that, and the softness of her cheek against his, and the long-forgotten sweet smell of her.

Now, Frederick was not the type of person to harm anything if he could avoid it; besides, he was totally confused. Not only was his wife here—here, of all places—but she was holding onto him tightly like she hadn't in years, whispering love, and welcoming him. If she was welcoming him, she must have been expecting him. As strange as this was, it was the only clear thing in the situation—that, along with the softness of her cheek against his and the long-forgotten sweet scent of her.

Frederick was bewildered. But not being the man to hurt anything if he could help it he too put his arms round her, and having put them round her he also kissed her; and presently he was kissing her almost as tenderly as she was kissing him; and presently he was kissing her quite as tenderly; and again presently he was kissing her more tenderly, and just as if he had never left off.

Frederick was confused. But since he wasn't the kind of guy to hurt anyone if he could avoid it, he wrapped his arms around her too, and once he did, he kissed her. Soon, he was kissing her almost as gently as she was kissing him; then he was kissing her just as gently; and again, soon he was kissing her even more tenderly, as if he had never stopped.

He was bewildered, but he still could kiss. It seemed curiously natural to be doing it. It made him feel as if he were thirty again instead of forty, and Rose were his Rose of twenty, the Rose he had so much adored before she began to weigh what he did with her idea of right, and the balance went against him, and she had turned strange, and stony, and more and more shocked, and oh, so lamentable. He couldn’t get at her in those days at all; she wouldn’t, she couldn’t understand. She kept on referring everything to what she called God’s eyes—in God’s eyes it couldn’t be right, it wasn’t right. Her miserable face—whatever her principles did for her they didn’t make her happy—her little miserable face, twisted with effort to be patient, had been at last more than he could bear to see, and he had kept away as much as he could. She never ought to have been the daughter of a low-church rector—narrow devil; she was quite unfitted to stand up against such an upbringing.

He was confused, but he could still kiss. It felt oddly natural to be doing it. It made him feel like he was thirty again instead of forty, and Rose was his Rose from twenty, the Rose he had adored so much before she started judging him based on her ideas of right and wrong, and the scales tipped against him, and she had become strange, cold, and more and more shocked, and oh, so sad. He couldn’t reach her at all during those days; she wouldn’t, she couldn’t understand. She kept linking everything to what she called God’s eyes—in God’s eyes it couldn’t be right, it wasn’t right. Her miserable face—whatever her principles did for her they didn’t make her happy—her little sad face, twisted with the effort to be patient, had finally become too much for him to bear, and he tried to keep his distance as much as possible. She should never have been the daughter of a strict church rector—narrow-minded; she was completely unfit to cope with such a background.

What had happened, why she was here, why she was his Rose again, passed his comprehension; and meanwhile, and until such time as he understood, he still could kiss. In fact he could not stop kissing; and it was he now who began to murmur, to say love things in her ear under the hair that smelt so sweet and tickled him just as he remembered it used to tickle him.

What had happened, why she was here, and why she was his Rose again was beyond his understanding; yet, in the meantime, until he figured it out, he could still kiss. In fact, he couldn't stop kissing; and now it was him who started to murmur, to whisper sweet things in her ear under the hair that smelled so sweet and tickled him just like he remembered it used to tickle him.

And as he held her close to his heart and her arms were soft round his neck, he felt stealing over him a delicious sense of—at first he didn’t know what it was, this delicate, pervading warmth, and then he recognised it as security. Yes; security. No need now to be ashamed of his figure, and to make jokes about it so as to forestall other people’s and show he didn’t mind it; no need now to be ashamed of getting hot going up hills, or to torment himself with pictures of how he probably appeared to beautiful young women—how middle-aged, how absurd in his inability to keep away from them. Rose cared nothing for such things. With her he was safe. To her he was her lover, as he used to be; and she would never notice or mind any of the ignoble changes that getting older had made in him and would go on making more and more.

And as he held her close to his heart and her soft arms wrapped around his neck, he felt a delicious sense of—at first he didn’t know what it was, this warm, soothing feeling, and then he recognized it as security. Yes, security. He no longer needed to feel ashamed of his body or make jokes about it to deflect others’ comments and show that it didn’t bother him; he didn’t need to feel embarrassed about getting hot going up hills or torture himself with thoughts of how he must look to beautiful young women—how middle-aged, how ridiculous in his inability to stay away from them. Rose didn’t care about any of that. With her, he felt safe. To her, he was still her lover, just like before; and she would never notice or worry about the unflattering changes that aging had brought him and would continue to bring.

Frederick continued, therefore, with greater and greater warmth and growing delight to kiss his wife, and the mere holding of her in his arms caused him to forget everything else. How could he, for instance, remember or think of Lady Caroline, to mention only one of the complications with which his situation bristled, when here was his sweet wife, miraculously restored to him, whispering with her cheek against his in the dearest, most romantic words how much she loved him, how terribly she had missed him? He did for one brief instant, for even in moments of love there are brief instants of lucid thought, recognise the immense power of the woman present and being actually held compared to that of the woman, however beautiful, who is somewhere else, but that is as far as he got towards remembering Scrap; no farther. She was like a dream, fleeing before the morning light.

Frederick continued, therefore, with increasing warmth and growing joy to kiss his wife, and just holding her in his arms made him forget everything else. How could he possibly remember or think about Lady Caroline, to name just one of the complications in his life, when here was his sweet wife, miraculously back in his arms, whispering the most tender, romantic words about how much she loved him and how terribly she had missed him? For a brief moment, even in the midst of love there are fleeting moments of clarity, he recognized the overwhelming presence of the woman right there with him compared to the woman, no matter how beautiful, who was far away, but that was as far as he got in remembering Scrap; no further. She felt like a dream, disappearing with the morning light.

“When did you start?” murmured Rose, her mouth on his ear. She couldn’t let him go; not even to talk she couldn’t let him go.

“When did you start?” Rose whispered, her mouth close to his ear. She couldn’t let him go; not even to talk could she let him go.

“Yesterday morning,” murmured Frederick, holding her close. He couldn’t let her go either.

“Yesterday morning,” Frederick whispered, holding her tightly. He couldn’t let her go either.

“Oh—the very instant then,” murmured Rose.

“Oh—the very moment then,” murmured Rose.

This was cryptic, but Frederick said, “Yes, the very instant,” and kissed her neck.

This was mysterious, but Frederick replied, “Yes, the exact moment,” and kissed her neck.

“How quickly my letter got to you,” murmured Rose, whose eyes were shut in the excess of her happiness.

“How fast my letter got to you,” murmured Rose, her eyes closed in overwhelming happiness.

“Didn’t it,” said Frederick, who felt like shutting his eyes himself.

“Didn't it,” said Frederick, who felt like closing his eyes too.

So there had been a letter. Soon, no doubt, light would be vouchsafed him, and meanwhile this was so strangely, touchingly sweet, this holding his Rose to his heart again after all the years, that he couldn’t bother to try to guess anything. Oh, he had been happy during these years, because it was not in him to be unhappy; besides, how many interests life had had to offer him, how many friends, how much success, how many women only too willing to help him to blot out the thought of the altered, petrified, pitiful little wife at home who wouldn’t spend his money, who was appalled by his books, who drifted away and away from him, and always if he tried to have it out with her asked him with patient obstinacy what he thought the things he wrote and lived by looked in the eyes of God. “No one,” she said once, “should ever write a book God wouldn’t like to read. That is the test, Frederick.” And he had laughed hysterically, burst into a great shriek of laughter, and rushed out of the house, away from her solemn little face—away from her pathetic, solemn little face. . .

So there was a letter. Soon, without a doubt, he would understand everything, and for now, it was so oddly, wonderfully sweet to hold his Rose close to his heart again after all those years that he couldn't even bother trying to guess anything. Oh, he had been happy during these years because he just wasn't the type to be unhappy; besides, life had offered him so many interests, so many friends, so much success, and so many women more than willing to help him forget about the changed, frozen, pitiful little wife at home who wouldn’t spend his money, who was horrified by his books, who drifted further and further away from him. And whenever he tried to confront her, she would patiently insist on asking him how he thought his writings and beliefs looked to God. “No one,” she said once, “should ever write a book that God wouldn't want to read. That’s the test, Frederick.” He had laughed madly, bursting into a wild fit of laughter, and rushed out of the house, escaping from her serious little face—away from her sad, serious little face...

But this Rose was his youth again, the best part of his life, the part of it that had had all the visions in it and all the hopes. How they had dreamed together, he and she, before he struck that vein of memoirs; how they had planned, and laughed, and loved. They had lived for a while in the very heart of poetry. After the happy days came the happy nights, the happy, happy nights, with her asleep close against his heart, with her when he woke in the morning still close against his heart, for they hardly moved in their deep, happy sleep. It was wonderful to have it all come back to him at the touch of her, at the feel of her face against his—wonderful that she should be able to give him back his youth.

But this Rose was his youth again, the best part of his life, the time filled with all his dreams and hopes. They had shared so many dreams together, he and she, before he got lost in writing memoirs; they had made plans, laughed, and loved. They had lived, for a while, right in the heart of poetry. After the joyful days came the joyful nights, the happy, happy nights, with her sleeping close against his heart, and when he woke up in the morning, she was still nestled there, as they hardly moved in their deep, blissful sleep. It felt incredible to have all of it come flooding back to him with her touch, with the feel of her face against his—amazing that she could return his youth to him.

“Sweetheart—sweetheart,” he murmured, overcome by remembrance, clinging to her now in his turn.

“Sweetheart—sweetheart,” he whispered, filled with nostalgia, holding onto her now in return.

“Beloved husband,” she breathed—the bliss of it—the sheer bliss . . .

“Beloved husband,” she sighed—the joy of it—the pure joy . . .

Briggs, coming in a few minutes before the gong went on the chance that Lady Caroline might be there, was much astonished. He had supposed Rose Arbuthnot was a widow, and he still supposed it; so that he was much astonished.

Briggs arrived a few minutes before the bell rang, hoping to see Lady Caroline, and was quite surprised. He had thought Rose Arbuthnot was a widow, and he still believed that, which made his surprise even greater.

“Well I’m damned,” thought Briggs, quite clearly and distinctly, for the shock of what he saw in the window startled him so much that for a moment he was shaken free of his own confused absorption.

“Well, I’m shocked,” thought Briggs, quite clearly and distinctly, because the surprise of what he saw in the window startled him so much that for a moment he was jolted out of his own confused thoughts.

Aloud he said, very red, “Oh I say—I beg your pardon”—and then stood hesitating, and wondering whether he oughtn’t to go back to his bedroom again.

Aloud he said, very embarrassed, “Oh, I’m sorry—I apologize”—and then stood there hesitating, wondering if he should go back to his bedroom again.

If he had said nothing they would not have noticed he was there, but when he begged their pardon Rose turned and looked at him as one looks who is trying to remember, and Frederick looked at him too without at first quite seeing him.

If he had stayed quiet, they wouldn't have noticed he was there, but when he asked for their pardon, Rose turned and looked at him like someone trying to remember, and Frederick looked at him too, not quite seeing him at first.

They didn’t seem, thought Briggs, to mind or to be at all embarrassed. He couldn’t be her brother; no brother ever brought that look into a woman’s face. It was very awkward. If they didn’t mind, he did. It upset him to come across his Madonna forgetting herself.

They didn’t seem, thought Briggs, to care or feel embarrassed at all. He couldn’t be her brother; no brother ever brought that kind of expression to a woman’s face. It was really uncomfortable. If they didn’t care, he did. It bothered him to see his Madonna acting out of character.

“Is this one of your friends?” Frederick was able after an instant to ask Rose, who made no attempt to introduce the young man standing awkwardly in front of them but continued to gaze at him with a kind of abstracted, radiant goodwill.

“Is this one of your friends?” Frederick managed to ask Rose after a moment, who didn’t try to introduce the young man standing awkwardly in front of them but kept looking at him with a sort of dreamy, warm kindness.

“It’s Mr. Briggs,” said Rose, recognizing him. “This is my husband,” she added.

“It’s Mr. Briggs,” Rose said, recognizing him. “This is my husband,” she added.

And Briggs, shaking hands, just had time to think how surprising it was to have a husband when you were a widow before the gong sounded, and Lady Caroline would be there in a minute, and he ceased to be able to think at all, and merely became a thing with its eyes fixed on the door.

And Briggs, shaking hands, just had time to think how surprising it was to have a husband when you were a widow before the gong sounded, and Lady Caroline would be there in a minute, and he stopped being able to think at all, and just became a thing with its eyes fixed on the door.

Through the door immediately entered, in what seemed to him an endless procession, first Mrs. Fisher, very stately in her evening lace shawl and brooch, who when she saw him at once relaxed into smiles and benignity, only to stiffen, however, when she caught sight of the stranger; then Mr. Wilkins, cleaner and neater and more carefully dressed and brushed than any man on earth; and then, tying something hurriedly as she came, Mrs. Wilkins; and then nobody.

Through the door that opened right away, it looked to him like an endless line of people. First was Mrs. Fisher, looking very elegant in her evening lace shawl and brooch. When she saw him, she immediately softened into smiles and warmth, but then froze when she noticed the stranger. Next came Mr. Wilkins, tidier, neater, and more carefully dressed than any man alive. Following him was Mrs. Wilkins, who was quickly tying something as she approached. And then there was nobody.

Lady Caroline was late. Where was she? Had she heard the gong? Oughtn’t it to be beaten again? Suppose she didn’t come to dinner after all. . .

Lady Caroline was late. Where was she? Did she hear the gong? Shouldn't it be struck again? What if she didn't come to dinner after all...

Briggs went cold.

Briggs froze.

“Introduce me,” said Frederick on Mrs. Fisher’s entrance, touching Rose’s elbow.

“Introduce me,” Frederick said as Mrs. Fisher walked in, nudging Rose’s elbow.

“My husband,” said Rose, holding him by the hand, her face exquisite.

“My husband,” said Rose, holding his hand, her face stunning.

“This,” thought Mrs. Fisher, “must now be the last of the husbands, unless Lady Caroline produces one from up her sleeve.”

“This,” thought Mrs. Fisher, “has to be the last of the husbands, unless Lady Caroline pulls one out of nowhere.”

But she received him graciously, for he certainly looked exactly like a husband, not at all like one of those people who go about abroad pretending they are husbands when they are not, and said she supposed he had come to accompany his wife home at the end of the month, and remarked that now the house would be completely full. “So that,” she added, smiling at Briggs, “we shall at last really be getting our money’s worth.”

But she welcomed him warmly, because he really did look like a husband, not like those guys who wander around pretending to be husbands when they’re not. She said she assumed he had come to take his wife home at the end of the month and noted that now the house would be totally full. "So," she added with a smile at Briggs, "we’ll finally be getting our money’s worth."

Briggs grinned automatically, because he was just able to realise that somebody was being playful with him, but he had not heard her and he did not look at her. Not only were his eyes fixed on the door but his whole body was concentrated on it.

Briggs smiled instinctively, realizing that someone was teasing him, but he hadn’t heard her, and he didn’t look her way. His eyes were locked on the door, and his entire body was focused on it.

Introduced in his turn, Mr. Wilkins was most hospitable and called Frederick “sir.”

Introduced in his turn, Mr. Wilkins was very welcoming and addressed Frederick as “sir.”

“Well, sir,” said Mr. Wilkins heartily, “here we are, here we are”—and having gripped his hand with an understanding that only wasn’t mutual because Arbuthnot did not yet know what he was in for in the way of trouble, he looked at him as a man should, squarely in the eyes, and allowed his look to convey as plainly as a look can that in him would be found staunchness, integrity, reliability—in fact a friend in need. Mrs. Arbuthnot was very much flushed, Mr. Wilkins noticed. He had not seen her flushed like that before. “Well, I’m their man,” he thought.

“Well, sir,” Mr. Wilkins said warmly, “here we are, here we are”—and after shaking his hand with a sense of understanding that was only one-sided because Arbuthnot didn’t yet realize the trouble he was about to face, he looked at him directly, making eye contact, and let his gaze communicate clearly that he could be trusted for steadfastness, integrity, and reliability—essentially, a friend in need. Mr. Wilkins noticed that Mrs. Arbuthnot was quite flushed. He had never seen her like that before. “Well, I’m here for them,” he thought.

Lotty’s greeting was effusive. It was done with both hands. “Didn’t I tell you?” she laughed to Rose over her shoulder while Frederick was shaking her hands in both his.

Lotty's greeting was enthusiastic. She used both hands. "Didn't I tell you?" she laughed to Rose over her shoulder while Frederick was shaking her hands with both of his.

“What did you tell her?” asked Frederick, in order to say something. The way they were all welcoming him was confusing. They had evidently all expected him, not only Rose.

“What did you tell her?” Frederick asked, trying to say something. The way they were all welcoming him was confusing. It was clear that they had all been expecting him, not just Rose.

The sandy but agreeable young woman didn’t answer his question, but looked extraordinarily pleased to see him. Why should she be extraordinarily pleased to see him?

The sandy but friendly young woman didn’t answer his question, but looked really happy to see him. Why should she be so happy to see him?

“What a delightful place this is,” said Frederick, confused, and making the first remark that occurred to him.

“What a lovely place this is,” said Frederick, feeling puzzled and saying the first thing that came to mind.

“It’s a tub of love,” said the sandy young woman earnestly; which confused him more than ever.

“It’s a tub of love,” said the young woman with sandy hair earnestly, which confused him even more.

And his confusion became excessive at the next words he heard—spoken, these, by the old lady, who said: “We won’t wait. Lady Caroline is always late”—for he only then, on hearing her name, really and properly remembered Lady Caroline, and the thought of her confused him to excess.

And his confusion increased when he heard the next words spoken by the old lady, who said: “We won’t wait. Lady Caroline is always late”—for it was only after hearing her name that he truly remembered Lady Caroline, and the thought of her overwhelmed him.

He went into the dining-room like a man in a dream. He had come out to this place to see Lady Caroline, and had told her so. He had even told her in his fatuousness—it was true, but how fatuous—that he hadn’t been able to help coming. She didn’t know he was married. She thought his name was Arundel. Everybody in London thought his name was Arundel. He had used it and written under it so long that he almost thought it was himself. In the short time since she had left him on the seat in the garden, where he told her he had come because he couldn’t help it, he had found Rose again, had passionately embraced and been embraced, and had forgotten Lady Caroline. It would be an extraordinary piece of good fortune if Lady Caroline’s being late meant she was tired or bored and would not come to dinner at all. Then he could—no, he couldn’t. He turned a deeper red even than usual, he being a man of full habit and red anyhow, at the thought of such cowardice. No, he couldn’t go away after dinner and catch his train and disappear to Rome; not unless, that is, Rose came with him. But even so, what a running away. No, he couldn’t.

He walked into the dining room like someone in a dream. He had come to this place to see Lady Caroline, and he had told her that. He even mentioned, in his foolishness—it was true, but still foolish—that he couldn’t help but come. She didn’t know he was married. She thought his name was Arundel. Everyone in London thought his name was Arundel. He had used it and written under it for so long that he almost believed it was his true identity. In the short time since she had left him sitting in the garden, where he told her he had come because he couldn’t resist, he had found Rose again, passionately embraced her, and been embraced in return, completely forgetting about Lady Caroline. It would be incredibly lucky if Lady Caroline being late meant she was tired or bored and wouldn’t come to dinner at all. Then he could—no, he couldn’t. He turned an even deeper red than usual, being a heavyset guy with a naturally reddish complexion, at the thought of such cowardice. No, he couldn’t leave after dinner, catch his train, and disappear to Rome; not unless, of course, Rose came with him. But even then, what a way to run away. No, he couldn’t.

When they got to the dining-room Mrs. Fisher went to the head of the table—was this Mrs. Fisher’s house? he asked himself. He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything—and Rose, who in her earlier days of defying Mrs. Fisher had taken the other end as her place, for after all no one could say by looking at a table which was its top and which its bottom, led Frederick to the seat next to her. If only, he thought, he could have been alone with Rose; just five minutes more alone with Rose, so that he could have asked her—

When they reached the dining room, Mrs. Fisher took her place at the head of the table—was this Mrs. Fisher’s house? he wondered. He had no idea; he didn’t know anything—and Rose, who in her earlier days of challenging Mrs. Fisher had claimed the other end as her spot, since no one could really tell which end of a table was the head, guided Frederick to the seat next to her. If only, he thought, he could have had just five more minutes alone with Rose, so he could have asked her—

But probably he wouldn’t have asked her anything, and only gone on kissing her.

But he probably wouldn’t have asked her anything and would have just kept kissing her.

He looked round. The sandy young woman was telling the man they called Briggs to go and sit beside Mrs. Fisher—was the house, then, the sandy young woman’s and not Mrs. Fisher’s? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything—and she herself sat down on Rose’s other side, so that she was opposite him, Frederick, and next to the genial man who had said “Here we are,” when it was only too evident that there they were indeed.

He looked around. The brunette woman was telling the guy they called Briggs to go sit next to Mrs. Fisher—was the house, then, the brunette woman's and not Mrs. Fisher's? He didn't know; he didn't know anything—and she sat down on Rose's other side, putting her opposite him, Frederick, and next to the friendly guy who had said, "Here we are," when it was pretty clear that they were indeed there.

Next to Frederick, and between him and Briggs, was an empty chair: Lady Caroline’s. No more than Lady Caroline knew of the presence in Frederick’s life of Rose was Rose aware of the presence in Frederick’s life of Lady Caroline. What would each think? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything. Yes, he did know something, and that was that his wife had made it up with him—suddenly, miraculously, unaccountably, and divinely. Beyond that he knew nothing. The situation was one with which he felt he could not cope. It must lead him whither it would. He could only drift.

Next to Frederick, and between him and Briggs, was an empty chair: Lady Caroline’s. Just as Lady Caroline didn’t know about Rose’s presence in Frederick’s life, Rose was completely unaware of Lady Caroline’s existence in his life. What would each of them think? He had no idea; he didn’t know anything. Well, he did know one thing: his wife had suddenly, miraculously, and inexplicably reconciled with him, which felt almost divine. Other than that, he was lost. The situation was one he felt he couldn’t handle. It would take him wherever it wanted. He could only go along for the ride.

In silence Frederick ate his soup, and the eyes, the large expressive eyes of the young woman opposite, were on him, he could feel, with a growing look in them of inquiry. They were, he could see, very intelligent and attractive eyes, and full, apart from the inquiry of goodwill. Probably she thought he ought to talk—but if she knew everything she wouldn’t think so. Briggs didn’t talk either. Briggs seemed uneasy. What was the matter with Briggs? And Rose too didn’t talk, but then that was natural. She never had been a talker. She had the loveliest expression on her face. How long would it be on it after Lady Caroline’s entrance? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything.

In silence, Frederick ate his soup while he could feel the large, expressive eyes of the young woman across from him watching him with increasing curiosity. They were very intelligent and attractive eyes, filled with goodwill, aside from the inquiry. She probably thought he should say something—but if she knew everything, she wouldn’t think that. Briggs didn’t talk either. Briggs seemed tense. What was bothering Briggs? And Rose didn’t talk either, but that was typical; she had never been much of a talker. She had the loveliest expression on her face. How long would that last after Lady Caroline showed up? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything.

But the genial man on Mrs. Fisher’s left was talking enough for everybody. That fellow ought to have been a parson. Pulpits were the place for a voice like his; it would get him a bishopric in six months. He was explaining to Briggs, who shuffled about in his seat—why did Briggs shuffle about in his seat?—that he must have come out by the same train as Arbuthnot, and when Briggs, who said nothing, wriggled in apparent dissent, he undertook to prove it to him, and did prove it to him in long clear sentences.

But the friendly guy sitting to Mrs. Fisher’s left was talking enough for everyone. That guy should have been a pastor. Pulpits were the perfect spot for a voice like his; he could land a bishopric in six months. He was explaining to Briggs, who kept shifting in his seat—why was Briggs moving around in his seat?—that he must have come in on the same train as Arbuthnot. And when Briggs, who didn’t say anything, squirmed as if he disagreed, he took it upon himself to prove it to him, and he did so in long, clear sentences.

“Who’s the man with the voice?” Frederick asked Rose in a whisper; and the young woman opposite, whose ears appeared to have the quickness of hearing of wild creatures, answered, “He’s my husband.”

“Who’s the guy with the voice?” Frederick asked Rose in a whisper; and the young woman across from him, whose ears seemed to have the keen hearing of wild animals, replied, “He’s my husband.”

“Then by all the rules,” said Frederick pleasantly, pulling himself together, “you oughtn’t to be sitting next to him.”

“Then by all the rules,” said Frederick nicely, getting himself together, “you shouldn’t be sitting next to him.”

“But I want to. I like sitting next to him. I didn’t before I came here.”

“But I want to. I like sitting next to him. I didn’t like it before I got here.”

Frederick could think of nothing to say to this, so he only smiled generally.

Frederick had no idea how to respond to this, so he just smiled politely.

“It’s this place,” she said, nodding at him. “It makes one understand. You’ve no idea what a lot you’ll understand before you’ve done here.”

“It’s this place,” she said, nodding at him. “It makes you see things clearly. You have no idea how much you’ll understand by the time you’re done here.”

“I’m sure I hope so,” said Frederick with real fervour.

“I really hope so,” said Frederick with genuine enthusiasm.

The soup was taken away, and the fish was brought. Briggs, on the other side of the empty chair, seemed more uneasy than ever. What was the matter with Briggs? Didn’t he like fish?

The soup was taken away, and the fish was brought. Briggs, on the other side of the empty chair, looked more uncomfortable than ever. What was wrong with Briggs? Didn’t he like fish?

Frederick wondered what Briggs would do in the way of fidgets if he were in his own situation. Frederick kept on wiping his moustache, and was not able to look up from his plate, but that was as much as he showed of what he was feeling.

Frederick wondered what Briggs would do to fidget if he were in his position. Frederick kept wiping his mustache and couldn't look up from his plate, but that was the extent of how he showed what he was feeling.

Though he didn’t look up he felt the eyes of the young woman opposite raking him like searchlights, and Rose’s eyes were on him too, he knew, but they rested on him unquestioningly, beautifully, like a benediction. How long would they go on doing that once Lady Caroline was there? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything.

Though he didn’t look up, he felt the young woman across from him staring at him like searchlights, and he knew Rose was watching him too, but her gaze was unwavering and beautiful, like a blessing. How much longer would they keep that up once Lady Caroline arrived? He had no idea; he didn’t know anything.

He wiped his moustache for the twentieth unnecessary time, and could not quite keep his hand steady, and the young woman opposite saw his hand not being quite steady, and her eyes raked him persistently. Why did her eyes rake him persistently? He didn’t know; he didn’t know anything.

He wiped his mustache for the twentieth time, even though it was unnecessary, and he couldn't keep his hand steady. The young woman across from him noticed his shaky hand, and her gaze bore into him insistently. Why was she looking at him like that? He had no idea; he didn't know anything.

Then Briggs leapt to his feet. What was the matter with Briggs? Oh—yes—quite: she had come.

Then Briggs jumped to his feet. What was wrong with Briggs? Oh—right—she had arrived.

Frederick wiped his moustache and got up too. He was in for it now. Absurd, fantastic situation. Well, whatever happened he could only drift—drift, and look like an ass to Lady Caroline, the most absolute as well as deceitful ass—an ass who was also a reptile, for she might well think he had been mocking her out in the garden when he said, no doubt in a shaking voice—fool and ass—that he had come because he couldn’t help it; while as for what he would look like to his Rose—when Lady Caroline introduced him to her—when Lady Caroline introduced him as her friend whom she had invited in to dinner—well, God alone knew that.

Frederick wiped his mustache and stood up too. He was in for it now. Absurd, crazy situation. Well, whatever happened, he could only drift—drift and look like a fool in front of Lady Caroline, the most totally self-absorbed and deceptive person—someone who was also two-faced, since she might think he had been mocking her in the garden when he stated, probably with a shaky voice—fool and idiot—that he had come because he couldn’t help it; as for how he would appear to his Rose—when Lady Caroline introduced him to her—when Lady Caroline introduced him as her friend whom she had invited to dinner—well, only God knew that.

He, therefore, as he got up wiped his moustache for the last time before the catastrophe.

He wiped his mustache one last time before the disaster as he got up.

But he was reckoning without Scrap.

But he didn't take Scrap into account.

That accomplished and experienced young woman slipped into the chair Briggs was holding for her, and on Lotty’s leaning across eagerly, and saying before any one else could get a word in, “Just fancy, Caroline, how quickly Rose’s husband has got here!” turned to him without so much as the faintest shadow of surprise on her face, and held out her hand, and smiled like a young angel, and said, “and me late your very first evening.”

That accomplished and experienced young woman settled into the chair Briggs was holding for her, and when Lotty leaned in eagerly and said before anyone else could interrupt, “Can you believe how quickly Rose’s husband got here?” she turned to him without a hint of surprise on her face, extended her hand, smiled like a young angel, and said, “And I’m late for your very first evening.”

The daughter of the Droitwiches. . .

The daughter of the Droitwiches. . .

Chapter 22

That evening was the evening of the full moon. The garden was an enchanted place where all the flowers seemed white. The lilies, the daphnes, the orange-blossom, the white stocks, the white pinks, the white roses—you could see these as plainly as in the day-time; but the coloured flowers existed only as fragrance.

That evening was the night of the full moon. The garden felt magical, with all the flowers appearing white. The lilies, daphnes, orange blossoms, white stocks, white pinks, and white roses were as visible as during the day; meanwhile, the colored flowers were only noticeable through their scent.

The three younger women sat on the low wall at the end of the top garden after dinner, Rose a little apart from the others, and watched the enormous moon moving slowly over the place where Shelley had lived his last months just on a hundred years before. The sea quivered along the path of the moon. The stars winked and trembled. The mountains were misty blue outlines, with little clusters of lights shining through from little clusters of homes. In the garden the plants stood quite still, straight and unstirred by the smallest ruffle of air. Through the glass doors the dining-room, with its candle-lit table and brilliant flowers—nasturtiums and marigolds that night—glowed like some magic cave of colour, and the three men smoking round it looked strangely animated figures seen from the silence, the huge cool calm of outside.

The three younger women sat on the low wall at the end of the upper garden after dinner, with Rose slightly apart from the others, and watched the huge moon moving slowly over the spot where Shelley had spent his last months just about a hundred years earlier. The sea shimmered along the moon’s path. The stars twinkled and flickered. The mountains appeared as misty blue outlines, with little clusters of lights shining through from small groups of homes. In the garden, the plants stood completely still, upright and untouched by the faintest breeze. Through the glass doors, the dining room, with its candlelit table and vibrant flowers—nasturtiums and marigolds that night—glowed like some magical cave of color, and the three men smoking around it looked like strangely animated figures seen from the quiet, cool calm of outside.

Mrs. Fisher had gone to the drawing-room and the fire. Scrap and Lotty, their faces upturned to the sky, said very little and in whispers. Rose said nothing. Her face too was upturned. She was looking at the umbrella pine, which had been smitten into something glorious, silhouetted against stars. Every now and then Scrap’s eyes lingered on Rose; so did Lotty’s. For Rose was lovely. Anywhere at that moment, among all the well-known beauties, she would have been lovely. Nobody could have put her in the shade, blown out her light that evening; she was too evidently shining.

Mrs. Fisher had gone to the living room and the fire. Scrap and Lotty, their faces turned up to the sky, said very little and whispered. Rose didn’t say anything. Her face was also turned up. She was looking at the umbrella pine, which looked incredible, silhouetted against the stars. Every now and then, Scrap’s eyes lingered on Rose; so did Lotty’s. Rose was beautiful. At that moment, among all the familiar beauties, she would have stood out. No one could have overshadowed her or dimmed her light that evening; she was clearly glowing.

Lotty bent close to Scrap’s ear, and whispered. “Love,” she whispered.

Lotty leaned in close to Scrap’s ear and whispered, “Love,” she said.

Scrap nodded. “Yes,” she said, under her breath.

Scrap nodded. “Yeah,” she said, barely audible.

She was obliged to admit it. You only had to look at Rose to know that here was Love.

She had to admit it. Just looking at Rose made it clear that this was Love.

“There’s nothing like it,” whispered Lotty.

“There’s nothing like it,” whispered Lotty.

Scrap was silent.

Scrap was quiet.

“It’s a great thing,” whispered Lotty after a pause, during which they both watched Rose’s upturned face, “to get on with one’s loving. Perhaps you can tell me of anything else in the world that works such wonders.”

“It’s an amazing thing,” whispered Lotty after a pause, during which they both watched Rose’s upturned face, “to move forward with one’s love. Maybe you can think of anything else in the world that works such wonders.”

But Scrap couldn’t tell her; and if she could have, what a night to begin arguing in. This was a night for—

But Scrap couldn’t tell her; and even if she could, what a night to start arguing. This was a night for—

She pulled herself up. Love again. It was everywhere. There was no getting away from it. She had come to this place to get away from it, and here was everybody in its different stages. Even Mrs. Fisher seemed to have been brushed by one of the many feathers of Love’s wing, and at dinner was different—full of concern because Mr. Briggs wouldn’t eat, and her face when she turned to him all soft with motherliness.

She took a deep breath. Love again. It was everywhere. There was no escaping it. She had come to this place to get away from it, and yet everyone was in their own stages of it. Even Mrs. Fisher seemed to have been touched by one of Love's many feathers, and at dinner, she was different—filled with concern because Mr. Briggs wouldn't eat, her face when she turned to him all soft and motherly.

Scrap looked up at the pine-tree motionless among stars. Beauty made you love, and love made you beautiful. . .

Scrap looked up at the pine tree, still against the stars. Beauty made you fall in love, and love made you beautiful.

She pulled her wrap closer round her with a gesture of defence, of keeping out and off. She didn’t want to grow sentimental. Difficult not to, here; the marvellous night stole in through all one’s chinks, and brought in with it, whether one wanted them or not, enormous feelings—feelings one couldn’t manage, great things about death and time and waste; glorious and devastating things, magnificent and bleak, at once rapture and terror and immense, heart-cleaving longing. She felt small and dreadfully alone. She felt uncovered and defenceless. Instinctively she pulled her wrap closer. With this thing of chiffon she tried to protect herself from the eternities.

She wrapped her shawl tighter around herself, as if trying to keep the world at bay. She didn’t want to get sentimental. It was hard not to in this place; the beautiful night seeped through every crack and brought with it, whether she liked it or not, overwhelming emotions—feelings that were too much to handle, deep thoughts about death, time, and loss; both glorious and heartbreaking, a mix of ecstasy and fear, and an immense, soul-crushing longing. She felt small and incredibly alone. She felt exposed and defenseless. Instinctively, she pulled her shawl tighter. With this chiffon, she attempted to shield herself from the infinite.

“I suppose,” whispered Lotty, “Rose’s husband seems to you just an ordinary, good-natured, middle-aged man.”

“I guess,” whispered Lotty, “Rose’s husband probably looks to you like just a regular, nice, middle-aged guy.”

Scrap brought her gaze down from the stars and looked at Lotty a moment while she focussed her mind again.

Scrap lowered her gaze from the stars and looked at Lotty for a moment as she refocused her mind.

“Just a rather red, rather round man,” whispered Lotty.

“Just a pretty red, pretty round guy,” whispered Lotty.

Scrap bowed her head.

Scrap hung her head.

“He isn’t,” whispered Lotty. “Rose sees through all that. That’s mere trimmings. She sees what we can’t see, because she loves him.”

“He’s not,” whispered Lotty. “Rose sees through all that. That’s just superficial stuff. She sees what we can’t see, because she loves him.”

Always love.

Love always.

Scrap got up, and winding herself very tightly in her wrap moved away to her day corner, and sat down there alone on the wall and looked out across the other sea, the sea where the sun had gone down, the sea with the far-away dim shadow stretching into it which was France.

Scrap got up, wrapped herself tightly in her cover, and moved to her spot for the day. She sat down alone on the wall and gazed across the other sea—the sea where the sun had set, the sea with the distant, faint shadow reaching into it that was France.

Yes, love worked wonders, and Mr. Arundel—she couldn’t at once get used to his other name—was to Rose Love itself; but it also worked inverted wonders, it didn’t invariably, as she well knew, transfigure people into saints and angels. Grievously indeed did it sometimes do the opposite. She had had it in her life applied to her to excess. If it had let her alone, if it had at least been moderate and infrequent, she might, she thought, have turned out a quite decent, generous-minded, kindly, human being. And what was she, thanks to this love Lotty talked so much about? Scrap searched for a just description. She was a spoilt, a sour, a suspicious, and a selfish spinster.

Yes, love worked wonders, and Mr. Arundel—she still had trouble getting used to his other name—was to Rose Love itself; but it also created the opposite effects, as she knew very well. It didn’t always turn people into saints and angels. Sometimes it did the exact opposite. She had experienced it in her life way too much. If it had just left her alone, if it had been at least moderate and happened less often, she thought she could have become a decent, generous-minded, kind person. And what was she, thanks to this love Lotty talked so much about? She was a spoiled, bitter, suspicious, and selfish single woman.

The glass doors of the dining-room opened, and the three men came out into the garden, Mr. Wilkins’s voice flowing along in front of them. He appeared to be doing all the talking; the other two were saying nothing.

The glass doors of the dining room opened, and the three men stepped out into the garden, with Mr. Wilkins's voice leading the way. He seemed to be doing all the talking; the other two were silent.

Perhaps she had better go back to Lotty and Rose; it would be tiresome to be discovered and hemmed into that cul-de-sac by Mr. Briggs.

Perhaps she should go back to Lotty and Rose; it would be annoying to be found and stuck in that cul-de-sac by Mr. Briggs.

She got up reluctantly, for she considered it unpardonable of Mr. Briggs to force her to move about like this, to force her out of any place she wished to sit in; and she emerged from the daphne bushes feeling like some gaunt, stern figure of just resentment and wishing that she looked as gaunt and stern as she felt; so would she have struck repugnance into the soul of Mr. Briggs, and been free of him. But she knew she didn’t look like that, however hard she might try. At dinner his hand shook when he drank, and he couldn’t speak to her without flushing scarlet and then going pale, and Mrs. Fisher’s eyes had sought hers with the entreaty of one who asks that her only son may not be hurt.

She got up reluctantly, feeling it was completely unfair of Mr. Briggs to make her move around like this, to push her out of any place she wanted to sit; and she stepped out from the daphne bushes feeling like a thin, stern figure filled with just anger, wishing she looked as thin and stern as she felt; then she could have struck fear into Mr. Briggs and been free of him. But she knew she didn’t look that way, no matter how hard she tried. At dinner, his hand shook when he drank, and he couldn’t talk to her without turning bright red and then pale, and Mrs. Fisher had looked at her with the desperate gaze of someone asking that her only son not be harmed.

How could a human being, thought Scrap, frowning as she issued forth from her corner, how could a man made in God’s image behave so; and he fitted for better things she was sure, with his youth, his attractiveness, and his brains. He had brains. She had examined him cautiously whenever at dinner Mrs. Fisher forced him to turn away to answer her, and she was sure he had brains. Also he had character; there was something noble about his head, about the shape of his forehead—noble and kind. All the more deplorable that he should allow himself to be infatuated by a mere outside, and waste any of his strength, any of his peace of mind, hanging round just a woman-thing. If only he could see right through her, see through all her skin and stuff, he would be cured, and she might go on sitting undisturbed on this wonderful night by herself.

How could a person, Scrap thought, frowning as she stepped out of her corner, how could a man created in God’s image behave like that? She was certain he was meant for better things, with his youth, his good looks, and his intelligence. He was smart. She had watched him carefully whenever Mrs. Fisher made him turn away to answer her at dinner, and she was convinced he was smart. He also had character; there was something noble about his face, about the shape of his forehead—noble and kind. It was even more tragic that he allowed himself to get pulled in by something superficial and wasted any of his energy, any of his peace of mind, hanging around just a woman. If only he could see through her, see past her exterior, he would be freed, and she could continue sitting peacefully by herself on this lovely night.

Just beyond the daphne bushes she met Frederick, hurrying.

Just past the daphne bushes, she ran into Frederick, who was in a hurry.

“I was determined to find you first,” he said, “before I go to Rose.” And he added quickly, “I want to kiss your shoes.”

“I was set on finding you first,” he said, “before I go to Rose.” And he added quickly, “I want to kiss your shoes.”

“Do you?” said Scrap, smiling. “Then I must go and put on my new ones. These aren’t nearly good enough.”

“Do you?” Scrap said with a smile. “Then I need to go put on my new ones. These aren’t nearly nice enough.”

She felt immensely well-disposed towards Frederick. He, at least, would grab no more. His grabbing days, so sudden and so brief, were done. Nice man; agreeable man. She now definitely liked him. Clearly he had been getting into some sort of a tangle, and she was grateful to Lotty for stopping her in time at dinner from saying something hopelessly complicating. But whatever he had been getting into he was out of it now; his face and Rose’s face had the same light in them.

She felt really positive about Frederick. At least he wouldn’t take advantage anymore. His days of grabbing, so sudden and so brief, were over. Nice guy; pleasant guy. She definitely liked him now. Clearly, he had been in some kind of trouble, and she was thankful to Lotty for stopping her just in time at dinner from saying something that would complicate things. But whatever he had been caught up in, he was out of it now; his face and Rose’s face had the same brightness in them.

“I shall adore you for ever now,” said Frederick.

“I'll adore you forever now,” said Frederick.

Scrap smiled. “Shall you?” she said.

Scrap smiled. “Will you?” she said.

“I adored you before because of your beauty. Now I adore you because you’re not only as beautiful as a dream but as decent as a man.”

“I loved you before for your beauty. Now I love you because you’re not just as beautiful as a dream but also as decent as a man.”

Scrap laughed. “Am I?” she said, amused.

Scrap laughed. “Am I?” she said, amused.

“When the impetuous young woman,” Frederick went on, “the blessedly impetuous young woman, blurted out in the nick of time that I am Rose’s husband, you behaved exactly as a man would have behaved to his friend.”

“When the impulsive young woman,” Frederick continued, “the wonderfully impulsive young woman, suddenly declared just in time that I am Rose’s husband, you reacted just as a man would to his friend.”

“Did I?” said Scrap, her enchanting dimple very evident.

"Did I?" said Scrap, her charming dimple clearly visible.

“It’s the rarest, most precious of combinations,” said Frederick, “to be a woman and have the loyalty of a man.”

“It’s the rarest, most valuable combination,” said Frederick, “to be a woman and have a man's loyalty.”

“Is it?” smiled Scrap, a little wistfully. These were indeed handsome compliments. If only she were really like that . . .

“Is it?” Scrap smiled, a bit wistfully. These were really nice compliments. If only she were actually like that . . .

“And I want to kiss your shoes.”

“And I want to kiss your shoes.”

“Won’t this save trouble?” she asked, holding out her hand.

“Won’t this make things easier?” she asked, extending her hand.

He took it and swiftly kissed it, and was hurrying away again. “Bless you,” he said as he went.

He took it and quickly kissed it, then hurried away again. “Bless you,” he said as he left.

“Where is your luggage?” Scrap called after him.

“Where's your luggage?” Scrap shouted after him.

“Oh, Lord, yes—” said Frederick, pausing. “It’s at the station.”

“Oh, yes—” said Frederick, pausing. “It’s at the station.”

“I’ll send for it.”

“I'll order it.”

He disappeared through the bushes. She went indoors to give the order; and this is how it happened that Domenico, for the second time that evening, found himself journeying into Mezzago and wondering as he went.

He vanished into the bushes. She went inside to give the order; and this is how it happened that Domenico, for the second time that evening, found himself traveling to Mezzago and pondering as he went.

Then, having made the necessary arrangements for the perfect happiness of these two people, she came slowly out into the garden again, very much absorbed in thought. Love seemed to bring happiness to everybody but herself. It had certainly got hold of everybody there, in its different varieties, except herself. Poor Mr. Briggs had been got hold of by its least dignified variety. Poor Mr. Briggs. He was a disturbing problem, and his going away next day wouldn’t she was afraid solve him.

Then, after making all the necessary arrangements for the perfect happiness of those two, she slowly stepped back into the garden, deep in thought. Love seemed to bring happiness to everyone but her. It had certainly gripped everyone around her, in its different forms, except for her. Poor Mr. Briggs had fallen for love in its least dignified form. Poor Mr. Briggs. He was a troubling issue, and she feared that his leaving the next day wouldn’t resolve anything.

When she reached the others Mr. Arundel—she kept on forgetting that he wasn’t Mr. Arundel—was already, his arm through Rose’s, going off with her, probably to the greater seclusion of the lower garden. No doubt they had a great deal to say to each other; something had gone wrong between them, and had suddenly been put right. San Salvatore, Lotty would say, San Salvatore working its spell of happiness. She could quite believe in its spell. Even she was happier there than she had been for ages and ages. The only person who would go empty away would be Mr. Briggs.

When she joined the others, Mr. Arundel—she kept forgetting he wasn’t actually Mr. Arundel—was already linked arm in arm with Rose, heading off together, probably to the more secluded lower garden. They surely had a lot to talk about; something had gone wrong between them but had suddenly been resolved. Lotty would say it was San Salvatore, San Salvatore casting its spell of happiness. She could definitely believe in its magic. Even she felt happier there than she had in a long time. The only person who would leave empty-handed was Mr. Briggs.

Poor Mr. Briggs. When she came in sight of the group he looked much too nice and boyish not to be happy. It seemed out of the picture that the owner of the place, the person to whom they owed all this, should be the only one to go away from it unblessed.

Poor Mr. Briggs. When she saw the group, he looked way too nice and youthful not to be happy. It seemed ridiculous that the owner of the place, the one they all owed this to, would be the only one leaving it without any blessings.

Compunction seized Scrap. What very pleasant days she had spent in his house, lying in his garden, enjoying his flowers, loving his views, using his things, being comfortable, being rested—recovering, in fact. She had had the most leisured, peaceful, and thoughtful time of her life; and all really thanks to him. Oh, she knew she paid him some ridiculous small sum a week, out of all proportion to the benefits she got in exchange, but what was that in the balance? And wasn’t it entirely thanks to him that she had come across Lotty? Never else would she and Lotty have met; never else would she have known her.

Compunction hit Scrap. She had enjoyed such lovely days in his home, lying in his garden, admiring his flowers, appreciating his views, using his things, feeling comfortable, and getting some much-needed rest—essentially recovering. She experienced the most leisurely, peaceful, and reflective time of her life, all thanks to him. Sure, she knew she paid him some laughably small amount each week, which was nothing compared to the benefits she received, but what did that even matter? And wasn't it completely due to him that she had met Lotty? They never would have crossed paths otherwise; she would never have known her.

Compunction laid its quick, warm hand on Scrap. Impulsive gratitude flooded her. She went straight up to Briggs.

Compunction placed its quick, warm hand on Scrap. Impulsive gratitude overwhelmed her. She went directly to Briggs.

“I owe you so much,” she said, overcome by the sudden realisation of all she did owe him, and ashamed of her churlishness in the afternoon and at dinner. Of course he hadn’t known she was being churlish. Of course her disagreeable inside was camouflaged as usual by the chance arrangement of her outside; but she knew it. She was churlish. She had been churlish to everybody for years. Any penetrating eye, thought Scrap, any really penetrating eye, would see her for what she was—a spoilt, a sour, a suspicious and a selfish spinster.

“I owe you so much,” she said, struck by the sudden realization of everything she owed him, and feeling embarrassed about her rudeness earlier in the day and at dinner. Of course, he didn’t realize she was being rude. Of course, her unpleasant feelings were usually hidden behind her outward appearance; but she knew the truth. She was rude. She had been rude to everyone for years. Any perceptive observer, Scrap thought, any truly perceptive observer, would see her for what she was—a spoiled, bitter, suspicious, and selfish single woman.

“I owe you so much,” therefore said Scrap earnestly, walking straight up to Briggs, humbled by these thoughts.

“I owe you so much,” Scrap said sincerely, approaching Briggs directly, feeling humbled by these thoughts.

He looked at her in wonder. “You owe me?” he said. “But it’s I who—I who—” he stammered. To see her there in his garden . . . nothing in it, no white flower, was whiter, more exquisite.

He looked at her in amazement. “You owe me?” he said. “But it’s me—I who—” he stuttered. To see her there in his garden . . . nothing in it, no white flower, was whiter, more beautiful.

“Please,” said Scrap, still more earnestly, “won’t you clear your mind of everything except just truth? You don’t owe me anything. How should you?”

“Please,” said Scrap, even more sincerely, “can’t you just focus on the truth and forget everything else? You don’t owe me anything. Why would you?”

“I don’t owe you anything?” echoed Briggs. “Why, I owe you my first sight of—of—”

“I don’t owe you anything?” Briggs repeated. “Why, I owe you my first glimpse of—of—”

“Oh, for goodness sake—for goodness sake,” said Scrap entreatingly, “do, please, be ordinary. Don’t be humble. Why should you be humble? It’s ridiculous of you to be humble. You’re worth fifty of me.”

“Oh, for goodness' sake—for goodness sake,” Scrap said earnestly, “please, just be yourself. Don’t be so modest. Why should you be modest? It’s silly for you to be modest. You’re worth fifty of me.”

“Unwise,” thought Mr. Wilkins, who was standing there too, while Lotty sat on the wall. He was surprised, he was concerned, he was shocked that Lady Caroline should thus encourage Briggs. “Unwise—very,” thought Mr. Wilkins, shaking his head.

“Unwise,” thought Mr. Wilkins, who was standing there too, while Lotty sat on the wall. He was surprised, he was concerned, he was shocked that Lady Caroline should thus encourage Briggs. “Unwise—very,” thought Mr. Wilkins, shaking his head.

Briggs’s condition was so bad already that the only course to take with him was to repel him utterly, Mr. Wilkins considered. No half measures were the least use with Briggs, and kindliness and familiar talk would only be misunderstood by the unhappy youth. The daughter of the Droitwiches could not really, it was impossible to suppose it, desire to encourage him. Briggs was all very well, but Briggs was Briggs; his name alone proved that. Probably Lady Caroline did not quite appreciate the effect of her voice and face, and how between them they made otherwise ordinary words seem—well, encouraging. But these words were not quite ordinary; she had not, he feared, sufficiently pondered them. Indeed and indeed she needed an adviser—some sagacious, objective counsellor like himself. There she was, standing before Briggs almost holding out her hands to him. Briggs of course ought to be thanked, for they were having a most delightful holiday in his house, but not thanked to excess and not by Lady Caroline alone. That very evening he had been considering the presentation to him next day of a round robin of collective gratitude on his departure; but he should not be thanked like this, in the moonlight, in the garden, by the lady he was so manifestly infatuated with.

Briggs’s situation was already so dire that Mr. Wilkins believed the only way to deal with him was to completely reject him. Half-hearted efforts wouldn’t work with Briggs, and kindness and casual conversation would only be misinterpreted by the troubled young man. The daughter of the Droitwiches couldn’t possibly want to encourage him—she just couldn’t. Briggs was fine, but he was still Briggs; his name alone made that clear. Lady Caroline probably didn’t fully realize how her voice and expression could make otherwise ordinary words seem—well, encouraging. But those words weren’t entirely ordinary; she hadn’t, he feared, thought them through enough. In fact, she really needed someone to advise her—some wise, objective counselor like him. There she was, standing in front of Briggs almost reaching out to him. Briggs should definitely be thanked since they were enjoying a wonderful holiday at his place, but not excessively and not just by Lady Caroline. That very evening, he had been contemplating presenting him with a round robin of collective gratitude when he left the next day; but he shouldn’t be thanked like this, under the moonlight, in the garden, by the woman he was clearly smitten with.

Mr. Wilkins therefore, desiring to assist Lady Caroline out of this situation by swiftly applied tact, said with much heartiness: “It is most proper, Briggs, that you should be thanked. You will please allow me to add my expressions of indebtedness, and those of my wife, to Lady Caroline’s. We ought to have proposed a vote of thanks to you at dinner. You should have been toasted. There certainly ought to have been some—”

Mr. Wilkins, wanting to help Lady Caroline out of this situation with some quick thinking, said cheerfully: “It’s only right, Briggs, that you should be thanked. Please let me express my gratitude, along with my wife’s, to Lady Caroline’s. We should have proposed a vote of thanks to you at dinner. You should have been toasted. There definitely should have been some—”

But Briggs took no notice of him whatever; he simply continued to look at Lady Caroline as though she were the first woman he had ever seen. Neither, Mr. Wilkins observed, did Lady Caroline take any notice of him; she too continued to look at Briggs, and with that odd air of almost appeal. Most unwise. Most.

But Briggs completely ignored him; he just kept staring at Lady Caroline as if she were the first woman he'd ever seen. Mr. Wilkins also noticed that Lady Caroline paid no attention to him either; she also kept looking at Briggs, with that strange expression of nearly pleading. Most unwise. Most.

Lotty, on the other hand, took too much notice of him, choosing this moment when Lady Caroline needed special support and protection to get up off the wall and put her arm through his and draw him away.

Lotty, however, paid too much attention to him, picking this moment when Lady Caroline needed extra support and protection to get up from the wall, link her arm through his, and pull him away.

“I want to tell you something, Mellersh,” said Lotty at this juncture, getting up.

“I want to tell you something, Mellersh,” Lotty said at this point, standing up.

“Presently,” said Mr. Wilkins, waving her aside.

“Right now,” said Mr. Wilkins, waving her off.

“No—now,” said Lotty; and she drew him away.

“No—right now,” said Lotty; and she pulled him away.

He went with extreme reluctance. Briggs should be given no rope at all—not an inch.

He went with great hesitation. Briggs shouldn’t be given any leeway at all—not even an inch.

“Well—what is it?” he asked impatiently, as she led him towards the house. Lady Caroline ought not to be left like that, exposed to annoyance.

“Well—what is it?” he asked impatiently as she led him toward the house. Lady Caroline shouldn’t be left like that, exposed to irritation.

“Oh, but she isn’t,” Lotty assured him, just as if he had said this aloud, which he certainly had not. “Caroline is perfectly all right.”

“Oh, but she isn’t,” Lotty reassured him, as if he had actually said this out loud, which he definitely hadn’t. “Caroline is doing just fine.”

“Not at all all right. That young Briggs is—”

“Not at all okay. That young Briggs is—”

“Of course he is. What did you expect? Let’s go indoors to the fire and Mrs. Fisher. She’s all by herself.”

“Of course he is. What did you think? Let’s go inside to the fire and Mrs. Fisher. She’s all alone.”

“I cannot,” said Mr. Wilkins, trying to draw back, “leave Lady Caroline alone in the garden.”

“I can’t,” said Mr. Wilkins, trying to pull away, “leave Lady Caroline by herself in the garden.”

“Don’t be silly, Mellersh—she isn’t alone. Besides, I want to tell you something.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Mellersh—she isn’t by herself. Also, I need to tell you something.”

“Well tell me, then.”

"Well, tell me then."

“Indoors.”

"Inside."

With a reluctance that increased at every step Mr. Wilkins was taken farther and farther away from Lady Caroline. He believed in his wife now and trusted her, but on this occasion he thought she was making a terrible mistake. In the drawing-room sat Mrs. Fisher by the fire, and it certainly was to Mr. Wilkins, who preferred rooms and fires after dark to gardens and moonlight, more agreeable to be in there than out-of-doors if he could have brought Lady Caroline safely in with him. As it was, he went in with extreme reluctance.

With increasing reluctance at every step, Mr. Wilkins was taken further away from Lady Caroline. He believed in his wife now and trusted her, but this time he thought she was making a huge mistake. In the living room sat Mrs. Fisher by the fire, and for Mr. Wilkins, who preferred rooms and fires after dark to gardens and moonlight, it was definitely more pleasant to be inside than outside, especially if he could have brought Lady Caroline in with him safely. As it was, he entered with great hesitation.

Mrs. Fisher, her hands folded on her lap, was doing nothing, merely gazing fixedly into the fire. The lamp was arranged conveniently for reading, but she was not reading. Her great dead friends did not seem worth reading that night. They always said the same things now—over and over again they said the same things, and nothing new was to be got out of them any more for ever. No doubt they were greater than any one was now, but they had this immense disadvantage, that they were dead. Nothing further was to be expected of them; while of the living, what might one not still expect? She craved for the living, the developing—the crystallised and finished wearied her. She was thinking that if only she had had a son—a son like Mr. Briggs, a dear boy like that, going on, unfolding, alive, affectionate, taking care of her and loving her. . .

Mrs. Fisher, with her hands resting in her lap, was doing nothing, just staring into the fire. The lamp was set up perfectly for reading, but she wasn't reading. Her beloved friends didn’t feel worth reading about that night. They just repeated the same things—over and over, saying the same old lines, and there was nothing new to gain from them anymore. Sure, they were greater than anyone around now, but they had one huge drawback: they were dead. There was nothing else to expect from them; while with the living, what could still be possible? She longed for the living, for growth—the completed and polished tired her out. She found herself wishing that she had a son—someone like Mr. Briggs, a sweet boy like him, growing, evolving, alive, loving her and taking care of her...

The look on her face gave Mrs. Wilkins’s heart a little twist when she saw it. “Poor old dear,” she thought, all the loneliness of age flashing upon her, the loneliness of having outstayed one’s welcome in the world, of being in it only on sufferance, the complete loneliness of the old childless woman who has failed to make friends. It did seem that people could only be really happy in pairs—any sorts of pairs, not in the least necessarily lovers, but pairs of friends, pairs of mothers and children, of brothers and sisters—and where was the other half of Mrs. Fisher’s pair going to be found?

The look on her face made Mrs. Wilkins’s heart twist when she saw it. "Poor old dear," she thought, feeling all the loneliness of age hit her—the loneliness of outliving one’s welcome in the world, of only being here by chance, the deep loneliness of an old woman without children who has struggled to make connections. It really seemed that people could only be genuinely happy in pairs—any kind of pairs, not just couples, but pairs of friends, pairs of mothers and kids, siblings—and where was the other half of Mrs. Fisher’s pair going to be found?

Mrs. Wilkins thought she had perhaps better kiss her again. The kissing this afternoon had been a great success; she knew it, she had instantly felt Mrs. Fisher’s reaction to it. So she crossed over and bent down and kissed her and said cheerfully, “We’ve come in—” which indeed was evident.

Mrs. Wilkins thought maybe she should kiss her again. The kissing this afternoon had been a big success; she knew it, and she had immediately felt Mrs. Fisher’s response to it. So, she walked over, leaned down, kissed her, and said cheerfully, “We’re here—” which was obviously the case.

This time Mrs. Fisher actually put up her hand and held Mrs. Wilkins’s cheek against her own—this living thing, full of affection, of warm, racing blood; and as she did this she felt safe with the strange creature, sure that she who herself did unusual things so naturally would take the action quite as a matter of course, and not embarrass her by being surprised.

This time, Mrs. Fisher actually raised her hand and pressed Mrs. Wilkins’s cheek against her own—this living being, full of warmth and affection, with racing blood; and as she did this, she felt safe with this strange person, confident that someone who does unusual things so effortlessly would take the action in stride, without making her feel awkward by being surprised.

Mrs. Wilkins was not at all surprised; she was delighted. “I believe I’m the other half of her pair,” flashed into her mind. “I believe it’s me, positively me, going to be fast friends with Mrs. Fisher!”

Mrs. Wilkins was completely unfazed; she was thrilled. “I think I’m the other half of her pair,” popped into her mind. “I really believe it’s me, definitely me, who’s going to be close friends with Mrs. Fisher!”

Her face when she lifted her head was full of laughter. Too extraordinary, the developments produced by San Salvatore. She and Mrs. Fisher . . . but she saw them being fast friends.

Her face when she lifted her head was filled with laughter. The changes brought about by San Salvatore were incredible. She and Mrs. Fisher . . . but she saw them becoming close friends.

“Where are the others?” asked Mrs. Fisher. “Thank you—dear,” she added, as Mrs. Wilkins put a footstool under her feet, a footstool obviously needed, Mrs. Fisher’s legs being short.

“Where are the others?” Mrs. Fisher asked. “Thank you, dear,” she added as Mrs. Wilkins placed a footstool under her feet, which was clearly needed since Mrs. Fisher had short legs.

“I see myself throughout the years,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes dancing, “bringing footstools to Mrs. Fisher. . .”

“I see myself over the years,” thought Mrs. Wilkins, her eyes sparkling, “bringing footstools to Mrs. Fisher. . .”

“The Roses,” she said, straightening herself, “have gone into the lower garden—I think lovemaking.”

“The Roses,” she said, sitting up straight, “have gone into the lower garden—I think they're making out.”

“The Roses?”

"The Roses?"

“The Fredericks, then, if you like. They’re completely merged and indistinguishable.”

“The Fredericks, if you prefer. They’re totally blended and impossible to tell apart.”

“Why not say the Arbuthnots, my dear?” said Mr. Wilkins.

“Why not mention the Arbuthnots, my dear?” said Mr. Wilkins.

“Very well, Mellersh—the Arbuthnots. And the Carolines—”

“Alright, Mellersh—the Arbuthnots. And the Carolines—”

Both Mr. Wilkins and Mrs. Fisher started. Mr. Wilkins, usually in such complete control of himself, started even more than Mrs. Fisher, and for the first time since his arrival felt angry with his wife.

Both Mr. Wilkins and Mrs. Fisher jumped. Mr. Wilkins, who usually had complete control over himself, reacted even more than Mrs. Fisher, and for the first time since he arrived, he felt angry with his wife.

“Really—” he began indignantly.

“Seriously—” he began indignantly.

“Very well, Mellersh—the Briggses, then.”

“Alright, Mellersh—the Briggses, then.”

“The Briggses!” cried Mr. Wilkins, now very angry indeed; for the implication was to him a most outrageous insult to the entire race of Desters—dead Desters, living Desters, and Desters still harmless because they were yet unborn. “Really—”

“The Briggses!” shouted Mr. Wilkins, now extremely angry; because the implication felt like a huge insult to all Desters—dead Desters, living Desters, and Desters that were still harmless because they weren’t born yet. “Honestly—”

“I’m sorry, Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins, pretending meekness, “if you don’t like it.”

“I’m sorry, Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins, feigning submissiveness, “if you don’t like it.”

“Like it! You’ve taken leave of your senses. Why, they’ve never set eyes on each other before to-day.”

“Like it! You’ve lost your mind. They’ve never even seen each other until today.”

“That’s true. But that’s why they’re able now to go ahead.”

"That’s true. But that’s why they can move forward now."

“Go ahead!” Mr. Wilkins could only echo the outrageous words.

“Go ahead!” Mr. Wilkins could only repeat the shocking words.

“I’m sorry, Mellersh,” said Mrs. Wilkins again, “if you don’t like it, but—”

“I’m sorry, Mellersh,” Mrs. Wilkins said again, “if you don’t like it, but—”

Her grey eyes shone, and her face rippled with the light and conviction that had so much surprised Rose the first time they met.

Her gray eyes sparkled, and her face glowed with the light and determination that had surprised Rose so much the first time they met.

“It’s useless minding,” she said. “I shouldn’t struggle if I were you. Because—”

“It’s pointless to worry,” she said. “I wouldn’t struggle if I were you. Because—”

She stopped, and looked first at one alarmed solemn face and then at the other, and laughter as well as light flickered and danced over her.

She paused, glancing first at one shocked, serious face and then at the other, as laughter and light flickered and danced around her.

“I see them being the Briggses,” finished Mrs. Wilkins.

“I see them as the Briggses,” finished Mrs. Wilkins.

That last week the syringa came out at San Salvatore, and all the acacias flowered. No one had noticed how many acacias there were till one day the garden was full of a new scent, and there were the delicate trees, the lovely successors to the wistaria, hung all over among their trembling leaves with blossom. To lie under an acacia tree that last week and look up through the branches at its frail leaves and white flowers quivering against the blue of the sky, while the least movement of the air shook down their scent, was a great happiness. Indeed, the whole garden dressed itself gradually towards the end in white, and grew more and more scented. There were the lilies, as vigorous as ever, and the white stocks and white pinks and white banksia roses, and the syringa and the jessamine, and at last the crowning fragrance of the acacias. When, on the first of May, everybody went away, even after they had got to the bottom of the hill and passed through the iron gates out into the village they still could smell the acacias.

That last week, the lilacs bloomed at San Salvatore, and all the acacias flowered. Nobody had realized how many acacia trees there were until one day the garden filled with a new scent, and there they were—delicate trees, the beautiful successors to the wisteria, adorned all over with their trembling leaves and blossoms. Lying under an acacia tree that last week, looking up through the branches at its fragile leaves and white flowers fluttering against the blue sky, while the slightest breeze released their fragrance, was pure joy. In fact, the whole garden slowly transformed into white by the end and became more and more aromatic. There were the lilies, as vibrant as ever, along with the white stocks, white pinks, white banksia roses, the lilacs, and the jasmine, culminating in the lovely scent of the acacias. When, on May 1st, everyone left, even after they made it to the bottom of the hill and passed through the iron gates into the village, they could still smell the acacias.


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