This is a modern-English version of The Poison Tree: A Tale of Hindu Life in Bengal, originally written by Cattopadhyaya, Bankimacandra.
It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling,
and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If
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THE POISON TREE
A Tale of Hindu Life in Bengal
A Tale of Hindu Life in Bengal
BY
BANKIM CHANDRA CHATTERJEE
TRANSLATED BY
TRANSLATED BY
MIRIAM S. KNIGHT
WITH A PREFACE BY
PREFACE BY
EDWIN ARNOLD, C.S.I.
London
London
T. FISHER UNWIN
26 PATERNOSTER SQUARE
1884

PREFACE

had been asked by the accomplished lady who has translated the subjoined story to introduce it with a few words of comment to the English public. For that purpose I commenced the perusal of the proof sheets; but soon found that what was begun as a literary task became a real and singular pleasure, by reason of the author's vivid narrative, his skill in delineating character, and, beyond all, the striking and faithful pictures of Indian life with which his tale is filled. Nor do these qualities suffer, beyond what is always inevitable, in the transfer of the novel from its[vi] original Bengali to English. Five years ago, Sir William Herschel, of the Bengal Civil Service, had the intention of translating this Bisha Briksha; but surrendered the task, with the author's full consent, to Mrs. Knight, who has here performed it with very remarkable skill and success. To accomplish that, more was wanted than a competent knowledge of the language of the original and a fluent command of English: it was necessary to be familiar with the details of native life and manners, and to have a sufficient acquaintance with the religious, domestic, and social customs of Bengali homes. Possessing these, Mrs. Knight has now presented us with a modern Hindu novelette, smoothly readable throughout, perfectly well transferred from its vernacular (with such omissions as were necessary), and valuable, as I venture to affirm, to English readers as well from its skill in construction and intrinsic interest as for the light which it sheds upon the indoor existence of well-to-do Hindus, and the excellent specimen which it furnishes of the sort of indigenous literature happily growing popular in their cities and towns.
I was asked by the talented woman who translated the story below to introduce it with a few words for the English audience. To do that, I started reading the proof sheets, but I quickly realized that what began as a literary task turned into a genuine and unique pleasure because of the author's vivid storytelling, his ability to craft characters, and, above all, the striking and accurate depictions of Indian life woven throughout the tale. These qualities do not diminish significantly in the transition from the original Bengali to English, despite what is always unavoidable. Five years ago, Sir William Herschel from the Bengal Civil Service intended to translate this Bisha Briksha; however, he handed the task over, with the author's full agreement, to Mrs. Knight, who has done an exceptional job with it. To achieve this, more was required than just a good understanding of the original language and a fluent command of English; it was essential to be knowledgeable about the intricacies of local life and customs and to have a solid understanding of the religious, domestic, and social practices of Bengali households. With these qualifications, Mrs. Knight has now given us a modern Hindu short novel that is easy to read, well-adapted from its vernacular (with necessary omissions), and, I dare say, valuable for English readers, both for its skillful construction and its inherent interest, as well as for the insight it provides into the indoor life of affluent Hindus, and as an excellent example of the type of indigenous literature that is thankfully gaining popularity in their cities and towns.
The author of "The Poison Tree" is Babu Bankim Chandra Chatterjee, a native gentleman of[vii] Bengal, of superior intellectual acquisitions, who ranks unquestionably as the first living writer of fiction in his Presidency. His renown is widespread among native readers, who recognize the truthfulness and power of his descriptions, and are especially fond of "Krishna Kanta's Will," "Mrinalini," and this very story of the Bisha Briksha, which belongs to modern days in India, and to the new ideas which are spreading—not always quite happily—among the families of the land. Allowance being made for the loss which an original author cannot but sustain by the transfer of his style and method into another language and system of thought, it will be confessed, I think, that the reputation of "Bankim Babu" is well deserved, and that Bengal has here produced a writer of true genius, whose vivacious invention, dramatic force, and purity of aim, promise well for the new age of Indian vernacular literature.
The author of "The Poison Tree" is Babu Bankim Chandra Chatterjee, a prominent gentleman from Bengal, with impressive intellectual achievements, who is undeniably the top living fiction writer in his region. His fame is extensive among local readers, who appreciate the accuracy and strength of his writing, and particularly enjoy "Krishna Kanta's Will," "Mrinalini," and this very story of the Bisha Briksha, which reflects modern times in India and the emerging ideas that are spreading—not always positively—among the families of the country. Taking into account the inevitable loss that an original author faces when their style and approach are translated into another language and way of thinking, it is fair to say that "Bankim Babu" has earned his reputation, and that Bengal has indeed produced a writer of true genius, whose lively imagination, dramatic impact, and noble intent hold great promise for the new era of Indian vernacular literature.
It would be wrong to diminish the pleasure of the English reader by analysing the narrative and forestalling its plot. That which appears to me most striking and valuable in the book is the faithful view it gives of the gentleness and devotion of the average Hindu wife. Western people are wont to think that because marriages[viii] are arranged at an early age in India, and without the betrothed pair having the slightest share in the mutual choice, that wedded love of a sincere sort must be out of the question, and conjugal happiness very rare. The contrary is notably the case. Human nature is, somehow, so full of accidental harmonies, that a majority among the households thus constituted furnish examples of quiet felicity, established constancy, and, above all, of a devotedness on the part of the Hindu women to their husbands and children, which knows, so to speak, no limit. The self-sacrifice of Surja Mukhi in this tale would be next to impossible for any Western woman, but is positively common in the East, though our author so well displays the undoubted fact that feminine hearts are the same everywhere, and that custom cannot change the instincts of love. In Debendra the Babu paints successfully the "young Bengalee" of the present day, corrupted rather than elevated by his educational enlightenment. Nagendra is a good type of the ordinary well-to-do householder; Kunda Nandini, of the simple and graceful Hindu maiden; and Hira, of those passionate natures often concealed under the dark glances and regular features of the women of the Ganges Valley. In a word,[ix] I am glad to recommend this translation to English readers, as a work which, apart from its charm in incident and narrative, will certainly give them just, if not complete, ideas of the ways of life of their fellow-subjects in Bengal.
It would be a mistake to spoil the enjoyment of the English reader by analyzing the story and revealing its plot. What stands out to me as the most impressive and valuable aspect of the book is the accurate depiction of the kindness and dedication of the typical Hindu wife. People in the West often assume that because marriages[viii] are arranged at a young age in India, without the couple having any say in the choice, genuine love in marriage must be impossible, and marital happiness must be quite rare. However, the opposite is true. Human nature, in its own way, is full of unexpected connections, so most households formed this way provide examples of quiet happiness, established commitment, and, above all, the unwavering dedication of Hindu women to their husbands and children, which knows no bounds. The self-sacrifice of Surja Mukhi in this story would be nearly impossible for any Western woman, but is quite common in the East, even though our author effectively shows that women's hearts are fundamentally the same everywhere, and that customs cannot alter the instincts of love. In Debendra, the Babu skillfully portrays the "young Bengalee" of today, who is more corrupted than enlightened by his education. Nagendra is a good representation of the average well-off householder; Kunda Nandini, of the simple and graceful Hindu girl; and Hira, of those passionate personalities often hidden behind the dark eyes and regular features of the women from the Ganges Valley. In summary,[ix] I am pleased to recommend this translation to English readers as a work that, aside from its charm in storytelling and narrative, will certainly provide them with accurate, if not complete, insights into the lifestyles of their fellow subjects in Bengal.
Edwin Arnold, C.S.I.
Edwin Arnold, C.S.I.
London, September 10, 1884.
London, September 10, 1884.


CONTENTS.
For the assistance of the reader, the names of the
principal characters in the tale are given—
For the reader's convenience, the names of the
main characters in the story are provided—
Nagendra Natha Datta | A wealthy Zemindar. |
Surja Mukhi | His wife. |
Debendra Datta | Cousin to Nagendra. |
Srish Chandra Mittra | Accountant in a Merchant's Office |
Kamal Mani | His wife, sister to Nagendra. |
Satish | Their baby boy. |
Tara Charan | Adopted brother of Surja Mukhi. |
Kunda Nandini | An Orphan Girl. |
Hira | Servant in Nagendra's household. |

CHAPTER I.
NAGENDRA'S JOURNEY BY BOAT.

agendra Natha Datta is about to travel by boat. It is the month Joisto (May—June), the time of storms. His wife, Surja Mukhi, had adjured him, saying, "Be careful; if a storm arises be sure you fasten the boat to the shore. Do not remain in the boat." Nagendra had consented to this, otherwise Surja Mukhi would not have permitted him to leave home; and unless he went to Calcutta his suits in the Courts would not prosper.[2]
Nagendra Natha Datta is about to travel by boat. It’s the month of Joisto (May—June), the season for storms. His wife, Surja Mukhi, had warned him, saying, "Be careful; if a storm comes, make sure to tie the boat to the shore. Don't stay in the boat." Nagendra agreed to this; otherwise, Surja Mukhi wouldn't have let him leave home. He needed to go to Calcutta to ensure that his court cases would succeed.[2]
Nagendra Natha was a young man, about thirty years of age, a wealthy zemindar (landholder) in Zillah Govindpur. He dwelt in a small village which we shall call Haripur. He was travelling in his own boat. The first day or two passed without obstacle. The river flowed smoothly on—leaped, danced, cried out, restless, unending, playful. On shore, herdsmen were grazing their oxen—one sitting under a tree singing, another smoking, some fighting, others eating. Inland, husbandmen were driving the plough, beating the oxen, lavishing abuse upon them, in which the owner shared. The wives of the husbandmen, bearing vessels of water, some carrying a torn quilt, or a dirty mat, wearing a silver amulet round the neck, a ring in the nose, bracelets of brass on the arm, with unwashed garments, their skins blacker than ink, their hair unkempt, formed a chattering crowd. Among them one beauty was rubbing her head with mud, another beating a child, a third speaking with a neighbour in abuse of some nameless person, a fourth beating clothes on a plank. Further on, ladies from respectable[3] villages adorned the gháts (landing-steps) with their appearance—the elders conversing, the middle-aged worshipping Siva, the younger covering their faces and plunging into the water; the boys and girls screaming, playing with mud, stealing the flowers offered in worship, swimming, throwing water over every one, sometimes stepping up to a lady, snatching away the image of Siva from her, and running off with it. The Brahmans, good tranquil men, recited the praises of Ganga (the sacred river Ganges) and performed their worship, sometimes, as they wiped their streaming hair, casting glances at the younger women.
Nagendra Natha was a young man, about thirty years old, a wealthy landowner in Zillah Govindpur. He lived in a small village we’ll call Haripur. He was traveling in his own boat. The first couple of days went smoothly. The river flowed gracefully—jumping, dancing, shouting, restless, endless, and playful. On the shore, herdsmen were grazing their oxen—one sat under a tree singing, another was smoking, some were fighting, and others were eating. Further inland, farmers were plowing, whipping the oxen, and hurling insults at them, which the owners joined in. The farmers' wives, carrying water, some with a tattered quilt or a dirty mat, wearing silver amulets around their necks, nose rings, and brass bracelets on their arms, with unwashed clothes, their skin darker than ink and their hair messy, formed a noisy group. Among them, one beauty was covering her head with mud, another was scolding a child, a third was gossiping with a neighbor about someone unnamed, and a fourth was beating clothes on a plank. A bit further, women from respectable villages brightened up the landing steps with their presence—the older women chatting, the middle-aged worshipping Siva, and the younger ones covering their faces and diving into the water; the boys and girls were shouting, playing with mud, stealing the flowers meant for worship, swimming, and splashing water on everyone, sometimes daring to approach a lady, snatch her Siva idol, and run off with it. The Brahmans, calm and serene, recited praises to Ganga (the sacred river Ganges) and conducted their rituals, occasionally wiping their wet hair while sneaking glances at the younger women.
In the sky, the white clouds float in the heated air. Below them fly the birds, like black dots. In the cocoanut trees, kites, like ministers of state, look around to see on what they can pounce; the cranes, being only small fry, stand raking in the mud; the dahuk (coloured herons), merry creatures, dive in the water; other birds of a lighter kind merely fly about. Market-boats sail along at good speed on their own behalf; ferry-boats creep along at elephantine pace to serve the needs of others[4] only: cargo boats make no progress at all—that is the owners' concern.
In the sky, the white clouds drift in the warm air. Below, birds zip by like little black dots. In the coconut trees, kites, like high-ranking officials, scan their surroundings for opportunities; the cranes, being smaller players, sift through the mud; the dahuk (colored herons), lively creatures, dive into the water; other lighter birds just flit around. Market boats cruise along at a good speed for themselves; ferry boats move at a slow, heavy pace to help others[4]; cargo boats don’t really make any progress at all—that’s just the owners’ issue.
On the third day of Nagendra's journey clouds arose and gradually covered the sky. The river became black, the tree-tops drooped, the paddy birds flew aloft, the water became motionless. Nagendra ordered the manji (boatman) to run the boat in shore and make it fast. At that moment the steersman, Rahamat Mullah, was saying his prayers, so he made no answer. Rahamat knew nothing of his business. His mother's father's sister was the daughter of a boatman; on that plea he had become a hanger-on of boatmen, and accident favoured his wishes; but he learned nothing, his work was done as fate willed. Rahamat was not backward in speech, and when his prayers were ended he turned to the Babu and said, "Do not be alarmed, sir, there is no cause for fear." Rahamat was thus brave because the shore was close at hand, and could be reached without delay, and in a few minutes the boat was secured.
On the third day of Nagendra's journey, clouds gathered and slowly covered the sky. The river turned dark, the tree tops sagged, the paddy birds soared above, and the water became still. Nagendra told the manji (boatman) to pull the boat to shore and secure it. At that moment, the steersman, Rahamat Mullah, was saying his prayers, so he didn’t respond. Rahamat didn’t really know what he was doing. His mother’s father’s sister was the daughter of a boatman; on that basis, he had become a part of the boatmen’s group, and luck had smiled on him. However, he learned nothing, doing his job as fate dictated. Rahamat was not shy about speaking, and when he finished praying, he turned to the Babu and said, “Don’t worry, sir, there’s nothing to fear.” Rahamat felt brave because the shore was close and could be reached quickly, and in a few minutes, the boat was secured.
Surely the gods must have had a quarrel with[5] Rahamat Mullah, for a great storm came up quickly. First came the wind; then the wind, having wrestled for some moments with the boughs of the trees, called to its brother the rain, and the two began a fine game. Brother Rain, mounting on brother Wind's shoulders, flew along. The two together, seizing the tree-tops, bent them down, broke the boughs, tore off the creepers, washed away the flowers, cast up the river in great waves, and made a general tumult. One brother flew off with Rahamat Mullah's head-gear; the other made a fountain of his beard. The boatmen lowered the sail, the Babu closed the windows, and the servants put the furniture under shelter.
Surely the gods must have had a fight with[5] Rahamat Mullah, because a huge storm came up suddenly. First came the wind; then the wind, after wrestling for a bit with the branches of the trees, called to its brother the rain, and the two started an epic game. Brother Rain, riding on brother Wind's shoulders, flew through the air. Together, they seized the treetops, bent them down, broke the branches, tore off the vines, washed away the flowers, created huge waves in the river, and caused chaos everywhere. One brother took off with Rahamat Mullah's headgear; the other turned his beard into a fountain. The boatmen lowered the sail, the Babu closed the windows, and the servants sheltered the furniture.
Nagendra was in a great strait. If, in fear of the storm, he should leave the boat, the men would think him a coward; if he remained he would break his word to Surja Mukhi. Some may ask, What harm if he did? We know not, but Nagendra thought it harm. At this moment Rahamat Mullah said, "Sir, the rope is old; I do not know what may happen. The storm has much increased;[6] it will be well to leave the boat." Accordingly Nagendra got out.
Nagendra was in a tough spot. If he left the boat because of the storm, the crew would think he was a coward; if he stayed, he would break his promise to Surja Mukhi. Some might wonder, what’s the big deal if he did? We don’t really know, but Nagendra thought it was important. At that moment, Rahamat Mullah said, "Sir, the rope is old; I can't predict what might happen. The storm is getting worse; it’s best to leave the boat." So, Nagendra got out.
No one can stand on the river bank without shelter in a heavy storm of rain. There was no sign of abatement; therefore Nagendra, thinking it necessary to seek for shelter, set out to walk to the village, which was at some distance from the river, through miry paths. Presently the rain ceased, the wind abated slightly, but the sky was still thickly covered with clouds; therefore both wind and rain might be expected at night. Nagendra went on, not turning back.
No one can stay by the riverbank without cover during a heavy rainstorm. There was no sign of it letting up, so Nagendra decided it was essential to find shelter and started walking to the village, which was a bit far from the river, through muddy paths. Soon the rain stopped, the wind died down a little, but the sky was still heavily overcast with clouds; so both wind and rain could be expected at night. Nagendra kept going, not turning back.
Though it was early in the evening, there was thick darkness, because of the clouds. There was no sign of village, house, plain, road, or river; but the trees, being surrounded by myriads of fireflies, looked like artificial trees studded with diamonds. The lightning goddess also still sent quick flashes through the now silent black and white clouds. A woman's anger does not die away suddenly. The assembled frogs, rejoicing in the newly fallen rain, held high festival; and if you listened attentively the voice of the cricket might be heard, like[7] the undying crackle of Ravana's[1] funeral pyre. Amid the sounds might be distinguished the fall of the rain-drops on the leaves of the trees, and that of the leaves into the pools beneath; the noise of jackals' feet on the wet paths, occasionally that of the birds on the trees shaking the water from their drenched feathers, and now and then the moaning of the almost subdued wind. Presently Nagendra saw a light in the distance. Traversing the flooded earth, drenched by the drippings from the trees, and frightening away the jackals, he approached the light; and on nearing it with much difficulty, saw that it proceeded from an old brick-built house, the door of which was open. Leaving his servant outside, Nagendra entered the house, which he found in a frightful condition.
Though it was early evening, it was dark because of the clouds. There was no sight of a village, house, field, road, or river; but the trees, surrounded by countless fireflies, looked like fake trees covered in diamonds. The lightning goddess still sent quick flashes through the now silent black and white clouds. A woman’s anger doesn’t fade away quickly. The gathered frogs, celebrating the recently fallen rain, held a lively festival; and if you listened closely, you could hear the cricket's song, like the unending crackle of Ravana's funeral pyre. Amid the sounds, you could distinguish the sound of raindrops hitting the leaves of the trees, and the leaves falling into the pools below; the noise of jackals' feet on the wet paths, occasionally the sound of birds on the trees shaking the water from their soaked feathers, and now and then the sighing of the almost subdued wind. Soon, Nagendra saw a light in the distance. Crossing the flooded ground, soaked by the drips from the trees and scaring away the jackals, he moved closer to the light; and as he got near it with great difficulty, he saw that it came from an old brick house with an open door. Leaving his servant outside, Nagendra entered the house, which he found in terrible condition.
It was not quite an ordinary house, but it had no sign of prosperity. The door-frames were broken and dirty; there was no trace of human occupation—only owls, mice, reptiles, and insects [8]gathered there. The light came only from one side. Nagendra saw some articles of furniture for human use; but everything indicated poverty. One or two cooking vessels, a broken oven, three or four brass dishes—these were the sole ornaments of the place. The walls were black; spiders' webs hung in the corners; cockroaches, spiders, lizards, and mice, scampered about everywhere. On a dilapidated bedstead lay an old man who seemed to be at death's door; his eyes were sunk, his breath hurried, his lips trembling. By the side of his bed stood an earthen lamp upon a fragment of brick taken from the ruins of the house. In it the oil was deficient; so also was it in the body of the man. Another lamp shone by the bedside—a girl of faultlessly fair face, of soft, starry beauty.
It wasn’t a typical house, but it showed no signs of wealth. The door frames were broken and dirty; there was no evidence of anyone living there—just owls, mice, reptiles, and insects [8] that had gathered. Light came in from only one side. Nagendra spotted some furniture meant for people, but everything suggested hardship. There were one or two cooking pots, a broken oven, and three or four brass dishes—these were the only decorations in the place. The walls were black; spider webs hung in the corners; cockroaches, spiders, lizards, and mice scurried around everywhere. On a rundown bed frame lay an old man who looked like he was about to die; his eyes were sunken, his breathing was rapid, and his lips were trembling. Next to his bed was an earthen lamp sitting on a piece of brick from the house’s ruins. The oil in it was low; the same went for the man’s strength. Another lamp was glowing by the bedside—a girl with a perfectly fair face and soft, starry beauty.
Whether because the light from the oil-less lamp was dim, or because the two occupants of the house were absorbed in thinking of their approaching separation, Nagendra's entrance was unseen. Standing in the doorway, he heard the last sorrowful words that issued from the mouth of the[9] old man. These two, the old man and the young girl, were friendless in this densely-peopled world. Once they had had wealth, relatives, men and maid servants—abundance of all kinds; but by the fickleness of fortune, one after another, all had gone. The mother of the family, seeing the faces of her son and daughter daily fading like the dew-drenched lotus from the pinch of poverty, had early sunk upon the bed of death. All the other stars had been extinguished with that moon. The support of the race, the jewel of his mother's eye, the hope of his father's age, even he had been laid on the pyre before his father's eyes. No one remained save the old man and this enchanting girl. They dwelt in this ruined, deserted house in the midst of the forest. Each was to the other the only helper.
Whether it was because the light from the oil-less lamp was dim or because the two people in the house were lost in thoughts about their impending separation, Nagendra's entrance went unnoticed. Standing in the doorway, he heard the last sorrowful words from the old man's lips. The old man and the young girl were alone in this crowded world. They had once enjoyed wealth, relatives, and plenty of servants—everything one could want; but due to the unpredictability of fate, everything had disappeared one by one. The mother, watching her son and daughter’s faces grow dim like dew-soaked lotuses under the weight of poverty, had succumbed to death early on. With her passing, all other sources of light had faded. The support of the family, the jewel of his mother's eye, the hope of his father's old age, even he had been cremated before his father’s eyes. There was no one left except the old man and this beautiful girl. They lived in this ruined, deserted house in the middle of the forest, with each being the only support for the other.
Kunda Nandini was of marriageable age; but she was the staff of her father's blindness, his only bond to this world. While he lived he could give her up to no one. "There are but a few more days; if I give away Kunda where can I abide?" were the old man's thoughts when the[10] question of giving her in marriage arose in his mind. Had it never occurred to him to ask himself what would become of Kunda when his summons came? Now the messenger of death stood at his bedside; he was about to leave the world; where would Kunda be on the morrow?
Kunda Nandini was of marriageable age, but she was the one thing that kept her blind father connected to the world. As long as he was alive, he couldn't bear to let her go. "There are only a few days left; if I give Kunda away, where would I go?" were the old man's thoughts when he contemplated her marriage. Had he ever thought about what would happen to Kunda when his time came? Now, with death looming at his bedside, he was about to leave the world behind; where would Kunda be the next day?
The deep, indescribable suffering of this thought expressed itself in every failing breath. Tears streamed from his eyes, ever restlessly closing and opening, while at his head sat the thirteen-year-old girl, like a stone figure, firmly looking into her father's face, covered with the shadows of death. Forgetting herself, forgetting to think where she would go on the morrow, she gazed only on the face of her departing parent. Gradually the old man's utterance became obscure, the breath left the throat, the eyes lost their light, the suffering soul obtained release from pain. In that dark place, by that glimmering lamp, the solitary Kunda Nandini, drawing her father's dead body on to her lap, remained sitting. The night was extremely dark; even now rain-drops fell, the leaves of the trees rustled, the wind moaned, the[11] windows of the ruined house flapped noisily. In the house, the fitful light of the lamp flickered momentarily on the face of the dead, and again left it in darkness. The lamp had long been exhausted of oil; now, after two or three flashes, it went out. Then Nagendra, with noiseless steps, went forth from the doorway.
The deep, indescribable pain from this thought showed in every shallow breath. Tears flowed from his eyes, restlessly closing and opening, while the thirteen-year-old girl sat at his head, like a stone figure, staring intently at her father's face, shadowed by death. Forgetting herself, forgetting to think about where she would go the next day, she only focused on the face of her dying parent. Gradually, the old man's words became unclear, his breath faded, his eyes lost their light, and his suffering soul was freed from pain. In that dark place, by the dim lamp, the lonely Kunda Nandini sat with her father's lifeless body on her lap. The night was pitch black; even now, raindrops fell, the leaves rustled, the wind howled, and the[11] windows of the crumbling house rattled loudly. Inside, the flickering light of the lamp momentarily illuminated the dead man's face before plunging it back into darkness. The lamp had long run out of oil; now, after a few flashes, it went out. Then Nagendra silently stepped out from the doorway.


CHAPTER II.
"COMING EVENTS CAST THEIR SHADOWS BEFORE."

t was night. In the ruined house Kunda Nandini sat by her father's corpse. She called "Father!" No one made reply. At one moment Kunda thought her father slept, again that he was dead, but she could not bring that thought clearly into her mind. At length she could no longer call, no longer think. The fan still moved in her hand in the direction where her father's once living body now lay dead. At length she resolved that he slept, for if he were dead what would become of her?[14]
It was night. In the ruined house, Kunda Nandini sat by her father's body. She called out, "Father!" No one answered. For a moment, Kunda thought her father was just asleep, then again that he was dead, but she couldn’t fully process that thought. Eventually, she could no longer call out or even think clearly. The fan still moved in her hand, pointing to where her father's once living body now lay lifeless. Eventually, she convinced herself that he was asleep, because if he were dead, what would happen to her?[14]
After days and nights of watching amid such sorrow, sleep fell upon her. In that exposed, bitterly cold house, the palm-leaf fan in her hand, Kunda Nandini rested her head upon her arm, more beauteous than the lotus-stalk, and slept; and in her sleep she saw a vision. It seemed as if the night were bright and clear, the sky of a pure blue—that glorious blue when the moon is encircled by a halo. Kunda had never seen the halo so large as it seemed in her vision. The light was splendid, and refreshing to the eyes. But in the midst of that magnificent halo there was no moon; in its place Kunda saw the figure of a goddess of unparalleled brilliance. It seemed as if this brilliant goddess-ruled halo left the upper sky and descended gradually lower, throwing out a thousand rays of light, until it stood over Kunda's head. Then she saw that the central beauty, crowned with golden hair, and decked with jewels, had the form of a woman. The beautiful, compassionate face had a loving smile upon its lips. Kunda recognized, with mingled joy and fear, in this compassionate being the[15] features of her long-dead mother. The shining, loving being, raising Kunda from the earth, took her into her bosom, and the orphan girl could for a long period do nought but utter the sweet word "Mother!"
After days and nights of watching in such sadness, sleep finally came to her. In that cold, bare house, Kunda Nandini rested her head on her arm, more beautiful than a lotus stalk, and fell asleep; and in her dreams, she saw a vision. It felt like the night was bright and clear, the sky a pure blue—that stunning blue when the moon is surrounded by a halo. Kunda had never seen a halo as large as the one in her vision. The light was brilliant and refreshing to her eyes. But within that magnificent halo, there was no moon; instead, Kunda saw the figure of a goddess of unmatched brilliance. It seemed as if this halo ruled by the radiant goddess gradually descended from the upper sky, casting a thousand rays of light, until it hovered over Kunda's head. Then she saw that the central beauty, crowned with golden hair and adorned with jewels, took the form of a woman. The lovely, compassionate face had a warm smile on its lips. Kunda recognized, with mixed feelings of joy and fear, in this kind figure the[15] features of her long-lost mother. The shining, loving being lifted Kunda from the ground, embracing her, and the orphan girl could only repeatedly say the sweet word "Mother!"
Then the shining figure, kissing Kunda's face, said to her: "Child, thou hast suffered much, and I know thou hast yet more to suffer; thou so young, thy tender frame cannot endure such sorrow. Therefore abide not here; leave the earth and come with me."
Then the glowing figure kissed Kunda's face and said to her, "Child, you’ve been through so much, and I know you have more suffering ahead; you’re so young, and your fragile body can’t handle this kind of pain. So don’t stay here; leave this world and come with me."
Kunda seemed to reply: "Whither shall I go?"
Kunda seemed to reply, "Where should I go?"
Then the mother, with uplifted finger indicating the shining constellations, answered, "There!"
Then the mother, pointing upwards at the shining stars, replied, "There!"
Kunda seemed, in her dream, to gaze into the timeless, shoreless ocean of stars, and to say, "I have no strength; I cannot go so far."
Kunda appeared, in her dream, to look into the endless, borderless ocean of stars, and to say, "I have no strength; I can't go that far."
Hearing this, the mother's kind and cheerful but somewhat grave face saddened, her brows knitted a little, as she said in grave, sweet tones:
Hearing this, the mother’s kind and cheerful yet somewhat serious face fell, her brows furrowing slightly as she spoke in a serious, gentle voice:
"Child, follow thy own will, but it would be[16] well for thee to go with me. The day will come when thou wilt gaze upon the stars, and long bitterly to go thither. I will once more appear to thee; when, bowed to the dust with affliction, thou rememberest me, and weepest to come to me, I will return. Then do thou come. But now do thou, looking on the horizon, follow the design of my finger. I will show thee two human figures. These two beings are in this world the arbiters of thy destiny. If possible, when thou meetest them turn away as from venomous snakes. In their paths walk thou not."
"Child, follow your own will, but it would be[16] better for you to come with me. The day will come when you will look at the stars and long desperately to go there. I will appear to you again; when you are brought low by suffering, and you remember me and weep to be with me, I will return. Then you should come. But for now, as you look at the horizon, follow where I point. I will show you two human figures. These two beings are the ones who control your fate in this world. If you can, when you meet them, turn away as if they were poisonous snakes. Do not walk in their paths."
Then the shining figure pointed to the opposite sky. Kunda, following the indication, saw traced on the blue vault the figure of a man more beautiful than a god. Beholding his high, capacious forehead, his sincere kindly glance, his swan-like neck a little bent, and other traits of a fine man, no one would have believed that from him there was anything to be feared.
Then the glowing figure pointed to the other side of the sky. Kunda, following the gesture, saw outlined against the blue expanse the figure of a man more beautiful than a god. Looking at his noble, broad forehead, his genuine, warm gaze, his gracefully curved neck, and other features of a fine man, no one would have thought that he had anything to fear.
Then the figure dissolving as a cloud in the sky, the mother said—
Then the figure faded away like a cloud in the sky, the mother said—
"Forget not this god-like form. Though bene[17]volent, he will be the cause of thy misery; therefore avoid him as a snake."
"Don’t forget this god-like figure. Even though he’s benevolent, he will be the reason for your misery; so steer clear of him like you would a snake."
Again pointing to the heavens she continued—
Again pointing to the sky, she continued—
"Look hither."
"Look here."
Kunda, looking, saw a second figure sketched before her, not this time that of a man, but a young woman of bright complexion and lotus-shaped eyes. At this sight she felt no fear; but the mother said—
Kunda looked and saw a second figure outlined in front of her, not a man this time, but a young woman with a bright complexion and lotus-shaped eyes. Upon seeing her, Kunda felt no fear; but the mother said—
"This dark figure in a woman's dress is a Rakshasi.[2] When thou seest her, flee from her."
"This dark figure in a woman's dress is a Rakshasi.[2] When you see her, run away."
[2] A female demon.
A female demon.
As she thus spoke the heavens suddenly became dark, the halo disappeared from the sky, and with it the bright figure in its midst.
As she spoke, the sky suddenly turned dark, the halo vanished, and along with it, the bright figure in the center.
Then Kunda awoke from her sleep.
Then Kunda woke up from her sleep.
Nagendra went to the village, the name of which he heard was Jhunjhunpur. At his recommendation and expense, some of the villagers performed the necessary rites for the dead, one of the female neighbours remaining with the bereaved girl. When Kunda saw that they had taken her father [18]away, she became convinced of his death, and gave way to ceaseless weeping.
Nagendra went to the village he heard was called Jhunjhunpur. At his suggestion and expense, some of the villagers performed the necessary rites for the dead, with one of the female neighbors staying with the grieving girl. When Kunda saw that they had taken her father [18] away, she became convinced he was dead and broke into endless tears.
In the morning the neighbour returned to her own house, but sent her daughter Champa to comfort Kunda Nandini.
In the morning, the neighbor went back to her house but sent her daughter Champa to comfort Kunda Nandini.
Champa was of the same age as Kunda, and her friend. She strove to divert her mind by talking of various matters, but she saw that Kunda did not attend. She wept constantly, looking up every now and then into the sky as though in expectation.
Champa was the same age as Kunda and her friend. She tried to distract her by talking about different things, but noticed that Kunda wasn't really paying attention. She kept crying, glancing up at the sky every now and then as if she was waiting for something.
Champa jestingly asked, "What do you see that you look into the sky a hundred times?"
Champa jokingly asked, "What are you looking for when you stare at the sky a hundred times?"
Kunda replied, "My mother appeared to me yesterday, and bade me go with her, but I feared to do so; now I mourn that I did not. If she came again I would go: therefore I look constantly into the sky."
Kunda replied, "My mom showed up to me yesterday and told me to come with her, but I was too scared to go; now I regret that I didn’t. If she came again, I would go: that's why I keep looking up at the sky."
Champa said, "How can the dead return?"
Champa said, "How can the dead come back?"
To which Kunda replied by relating her vision.
To which Kunda responded by sharing her vision.
Greatly astonished, Champa asked, "Are you acquainted with the man and woman whose forms you saw in the sky?"[19]
Greatly surprised, Champa asked, "Do you know the man and woman whose shapes you saw in the sky?"[19]
"No, I had never seen them. There cannot be anywhere a man so handsome; I never saw such beauty."
"No, I had never seen them. There can’t be anywhere a man so handsome; I’ve never seen such beauty."
On rising in the morning, Nagendra inquired of the people in the village what would become of the dead man's daughter, where she would live, and whether she had any relatives. He was told that there was no dwelling-place for her, and that she had no relatives.
On waking up in the morning, Nagendra asked the villagers what would happen to the dead man's daughter, where she would live, and if she had any relatives. They told him that she had no home and no family.
Then Nagendra said, "Will not some of you receive her and give her in marriage? I will pay the expense, and so long as she remains amongst you I will pay so much a month for her board and lodging."
Then Nagendra said, "Won't some of you take her in and arrange her marriage? I'll cover the expenses, and as long as she's with you, I'll pay a monthly amount for her food and accommodation."
If he had offered ready money many would have consented to his proposal; but after he had gone away Kunda would have been reduced to servitude, or turned out of the house. Nagendra did not act in so foolish a manner; therefore, money not being forthcoming, no one consented to his suggestion.
If he had offered cash, many would have agreed to his proposal; but once he left, Kunda would have been forced into servitude or kicked out of the house. Nagendra didn’t act so foolishly; so, with no money being offered, no one agreed to his suggestion.
At length one, seeing him at the end of his[20] resources, observed: "A sister of her mother's lives at Sham Bazar; Binod Ghosh is the husband's name. You are on you way to Calcutta; if you take her with you and place her with her aunt, then this Kaystha girl will be cared for, and you will have done your duty to your caste."
At last, one, noticing that he had run out of options, said: "A sister of her mother lives at Sham Bazar; Binod Ghosh is her husband's name. You're on your way to Calcutta; if you take her with you and leave her with her aunt, then this Kaystha girl will be taken care of, and you will have fulfilled your duty to your caste."
Seeing no other plan, Nagendra adopted this suggestion, and sent for Kunda to acquaint her with the arrangement.
Seeing no other option, Nagendra agreed to this suggestion and called for Kunda to inform her about the plan.
Champa accompanied Kunda. As they were coming, Kunda, seeing Nagendra from afar, suddenly stood still like one stunned. Her feet refused to move; she stood looking at him with eyes full of astonishment.
Champa went with Kunda. As they approached, Kunda spotted Nagendra from a distance and froze, looking stunned. She couldn’t make her feet move; she just stood there staring at him with wide eyes filled with shock.
Champa asked, "Why do you stand thus?"
Champa asked, "Why are you standing like that?"
Kunda, pointing with her finger, said, "It is he!"
Kunda pointed and said, "That's him!"
"He! Who?" said Champa.
"He! Who?" said Champa.
"He whom last night my mother pictured in the heavens."
"He who my mother imagined in the sky last night."
Then Champa also stood frightened and astonished. Seeing that the girls shrank from[21] approaching, Nagendra came near and explained everything. Kunda was unable to reply; she could only gaze with eyes full of surprise.
Then Champa also stood scared and shocked. Seeing that the girls were backing away from[21] approaching, Nagendra came closer and explained everything. Kunda couldn't respond; she could only stare with wide, surprised eyes.


CHAPTER III.
OF MANY SUBJECTS.

eluctantly did Nagendra Natha take Kunda with him to Calcutta. On arriving there he made much search for her aunt's husband, but he found no one in Sham Bazar named Binod Ghosh. He found a Binod Das, who admitted no relationship. Thus Kunda remained as a burthen upon Nagendra.
Reluctantly, Nagendra Natha took Kunda with him to Calcutta. Upon arriving there, he searched a lot for her aunt's husband, but he couldn't find anyone named Binod Ghosh in Sham Bazar. He did find a Binod Das, who denied any relationship. So, Kunda continued to be a burden on Nagendra.
Nagendra had one sister, younger than himself, named Kamal Mani, whose father-in-law's house was in Calcutta. Her husband's name was Srish Chandra Mittra. Srish Babu was accountant in[24] the house of Plunder, Fairly, and Co. It was a great house, and Srish Chandra was wealthy. He was much attached to his brother-in-law. Nagendra took Kunda Nandini thither, and imparted her story to Kamal Mani.
Nagendra had one younger sister named Kamal Mani, whose father-in-law lived in Calcutta. Her husband was Srish Chandra Mittra. Srish Babu worked as an accountant in [24] the house of Plunder, Fairly, and Co. It was a prominent company, and Srish Chandra was well-off. He was very close to his brother-in-law. Nagendra brought Kunda Nandini there and shared her story with Kamal Mani.
Kamal was about eighteen years of age. In features she resembled Nagendra; both brother and sister were very handsome. But, in addition to her beauty, Kamal was famed for her learning. Nagendra's father, engaging an English teacher, had had Kamal Mani and Surja Mukhi well instructed. Kamal's mother-in-law was living, but she dwelt in Srish Chandra's ancestral home. In Calcutta Kamal Mani was house-mistress.
Kamal was about eighteen years old. She looked a lot like her brother Nagendra; both of them were very good-looking. However, aside from her beauty, Kamal was also known for her intelligence. Nagendra's father hired an English teacher to ensure that Kamal Mani and Surja Mukhi received a good education. Kamal's mother-in-law was still alive, but she lived in Srish Chandra's family home. In Calcutta, Kamal Mani was the head of the household.
When he had finished the story of Kunda Nandini, Nagendra said, "Unless you will keep her here, there is no place for her. Later, when I return home, I will take her to Govindpur with me."
When he finished telling the story of Kunda Nandini, Nagendra said, "If you don't keep her here, there's nowhere for her to go. Later, when I go home, I'll take her to Govindpur with me."
Kamal was very mischievous. When Nagendra had turned away, she snatched up Kunda in her arms and ran off with her. A tub of not very hot water stood in an adjoining room, and suddenly[25] Kamal threw Kunda into it. Kunda was quite frightened. Then Kamal, laughing, took some scented soap and proceeded to wash Kunda. An attendant, seeing Kamal thus employed, bustled up, saying, "I will do it! I will do it!" but Kamal, sprinkling some of the hot water over the woman, sent her running away. Kamal having bathed and rubbed Kunda, she appeared like a dew-washed lotus. Then Kamal, having robed her in a beautiful white garment, dressed her hair with scented oil, and decorated her with ornaments, said to her: "Now go and salute the Dada Babu (elder brother), and return, but mind you do not thus to the master of the house: if he should see you he will want to marry you."
Kamal was very playful. When Nagendra looked away, she grabbed Kunda and ran off with her. There was a tub of warm water in the next room, and suddenly, Kamal tossed Kunda into it. Kunda was quite startled. Then, laughing, Kamal took some scented soap and started to wash Kunda. An attendant, seeing Kamal busy, hurried over, saying, "Let me do it! Let me do it!" but Kamal splashed some hot water at the woman, sending her off. After bathing and rubbing Kunda down, she looked like a dew-kissed lotus. Then Kamal dressed her in a lovely white outfit, styled her hair with scented oil, and adorned her with jewelry, saying, "Now go and greet the Dada Babu (elder brother), and come back, but be careful not to show yourself to the master of the house: if he sees you, he’ll want to marry you."
Nagendra Natha wrote Kunda's history to Surja Mukhi. Also when writing to an intimate friend of his living at a distance, named Hara Deb Ghosal, he spoke of Kunda in the following terms:
Nagendra Natha wrote Kunda's history to Surja Mukhi. Also, when he wrote to a close friend of his who lived far away, named Hara Deb Ghosal, he referred to Kunda in these terms:
"Tell me what you consider to be the age of beauty in woman. You will say after forty, because your Brahmini is a year or two more than that. The girl Kunda, whose history I have given[26] you, is thirteen. On looking at her, it seems as if that were the age of beauty. The sweetness and simplicity that precede the budding-time of youth are never seen afterwards. This Kunda's simplicity is astonishing; she understands nothing. To-day she even wished to run into the streets to play with the boys. On being forbidden, she was much frightened, and desisted. Kamal is teaching her, and says she shows much aptitude in learning, but she does not understand other things. For instance, her large blue eyes—eyes swimming ever like the autumn lotus in clear water—these two eyes may be fixed upon my face, but they say nothing. I lose my senses gazing on them; I cannot explain better. You will laugh at this history of my mental stability; but if I could place you in front of those eyes, I should see what your firmness is worth. Up to this time I have been unable to determine what those eyes are like. I have not seen them look twice the same; I think there are no other such eyes in the world, they seem as if they scarcely saw the things of earth, but were ever seeking something in space. It is[27] not that Kunda is faultlessly beautiful. Her features, if compared with those of many others, would not be highly praised; yet I think I never saw such rare beauty. It is as if there were in Kunda Nandini something not of this world, as though she were not made of flesh and blood, but of moonbeams and the scent of flowers. Nothing presents itself to my mind at this moment to which to liken her. Incomparable being! her whole person seems to breathe peace. If in some clear pool you have observed the sheen produced by the rays of the autumn moon, you have seen something resembling her. I can think of no other simile."
"Tell me what you think the age of beauty is for a woman. You might say it’s after forty, since your Brahmini is a year or two older than that. The girl Kunda, whose story I've shared[26] with you, is thirteen. When you look at her, it feels like that is the age of beauty. The sweetness and simplicity that come before the blossoming of youth are never found again. Kunda’s simplicity is remarkable; she understands nothing. Today, she even wanted to run out into the streets to play with the boys. When I told her not to, she was very scared and backed off. Kamal is teaching her and says she’s quite quick in learning, but she doesn’t grasp other things. For example, her big blue eyes—always shimmering like an autumn lotus in clear water—may be staring at my face, but they say nothing. I lose myself just looking at them; I can’t explain it better. You might laugh at my struggles with stability, but if I could put you in front of those eyes, I’d see what your strength is worth. So far, I’ve been unable to figure out what those eyes resemble. I’ve never seen them look the same way twice; I think there are no other eyes like them in the world. They seem as if they barely see the things of earth and are always searching for something in the sky. It’s[27] not that Kunda is perfectly beautiful. If you compared her features to many others, they wouldn’t receive high praise; yet, I believe I’ve never seen such unique beauty. It’s as if Kunda possesses something otherworldly, as if she’s made not of flesh and blood, but of moonlight and the scent of flowers. Nothing comes to mind at this moment that can be compared to her. An incomparable being! Her entire presence seems to radiate peace. If you’ve ever noticed the shimmer created by the autumn moon’s rays in a clear pool, you’ve seen something similar to her. I can think of no other comparison."
Surja Mukhi's reply to Nagendra's letter came in a few days. It was after this manner:
Surja Mukhi's response to Nagendra's letter arrived a few days later. It went like this:
"I know not what fault your servant has committed. If it is necessary you should stay so long in Calcutta, why am I not with you to attend upon you? This is my earnest wish; the moment I receive your consent, I will set out.
"I don't know what mistake your servant has made. If you need to stay in Calcutta for this long, why am I not there to take care of you? This is my sincere wish; as soon as I get your approval, I will leave."
"In picking up a little girl, have you forgotten me? Many unripe things are esteemed. People[28] like green guavas, and green cucumbers; green cocoa-nuts are cooling. This low-born female is also, I think, very young, else in meeting with her why should you forget me? Joking apart, have you given up all right over this girl? if not, I beg her from you. It is my business to arrange for her. In whatever becomes yours I have the right to share, but in this case I see your sister has entire possession. Still, I shall not vex myself much if Kamal usurps my rights.
"In picking up a little girl, have you forgotten about me? People often value things that aren’t fully developed. They enjoy green guavas and green cucumbers; green coconuts are refreshing. This low-born girl seems very young too; otherwise, why would you forget me when you meet her? Joking aside, have you given up all claim to this girl? If not, I’m asking for her from you. It’s my responsibility to take care of her. I have a right to share in whatever becomes yours, but in this case, I see your sister has full possession. Still, I won’t worry too much if Kamal takes what’s mine."
"Do you ask what do I want with the girl? I wish to give her in marriage with Tara Charan. You know how much I have sought for a suitable wife for him. If Providence has sent us a good girl, do not disappoint me. If Kamal will give her up, bring Kunda Nandini with you when you come. I have written to Kamal also recommending this. I am having ornaments fashioned, and am making other preparations for the marriage. Do not linger in Calcutta. Is it not true that if a man stays six months in that city he becomes quite stupid? If you design to marry Kunda, bring her with you, and I will give her to you.[29] Only say that you propose to marry her, and I will arrange the marriage-basket."
"Are you asking what I want with the girl? I want to give her in marriage to Tara Charan. You know how much I’ve searched for a suitable wife for him. If fate has brought us a good girl, please don’t let me down. If Kamal gives her up, bring Kunda Nandini with you when you come. I've also written to Kamal recommending this. I'm having jewelry made and preparing other things for the wedding. Don’t take your time in Calcutta. Isn’t it true that if a man stays six months in that city, he becomes quite dull? If you plan to marry Kunda, bring her with you, and I’ll give her to you.[29] Just let me know that you want to marry her, and I’ll arrange the wedding gifts."
Who Tara Charan was will be explained later. Whoever he was, both Nagendra and Kamal Mani consented to Surja Mukhi's proposal. Therefore it was resolved that when Nagendra went home Kunda Nandini should accompany him. Every one consented with delight, and Kamal also prepared some ornaments. How blind is man to the future! Some years later there came a day when Nagendra and Kamal Mani bowed to the dust, and, striking their foreheads in grief, murmured: "In how evil a moment did we find Kunda Nandini! in how evil an hour did we agree to Surja Mukhi's letter!" Now Kamal Mani, Surja Mukhi, and Nagendra, together have sowed the poison seed; later they will all repent it with wailing.
Who Tara Charan was will be explained later. Regardless of who he was, both Nagendra and Kamal Mani agreed to Surja Mukhi's proposal. It was decided that when Nagendra returned home, Kunda Nandini should go with him. Everyone consented with joy, and Kamal also prepared some jewelry. How blind people are to the future! A few years later, there came a day when Nagendra and Kamal Mani bowed to the ground, and, striking their foreheads in grief, murmured: "In how evil a moment did we find Kunda Nandini! In how evil an hour did we agree to Surja Mukhi's letter!" Now Kamal Mani, Surja Mukhi, and Nagendra have all sown the seeds of poison; later, they will all regret it with cries of despair.
Causing his boat to be got ready, Nagendra returned to Govindpur with Kunda Nandini. Kunda had almost forgotten her dream; while journeying with Nagendra it recurred to her memory, but thinking of his benevolent face and[30] kindly character, Kunda could not believe that any harm would come to her from him. In like manner there are many insects who, seeing a destructive flame, enter therein.
Causing his boat to be ready, Nagendra returned to Govindpur with Kunda Nandini. Kunda had almost forgotten her dream; while traveling with Nagendra, it came back to her mind, but thinking of his kind face and[30] gentle nature, Kunda couldn't believe that any harm would come to her from him. Similarly, there are many insects that, seeing a destructive flame, fly right into it.


CHAPTER IV.
TARA CHARAN.

he Poet Kalidas was supplied with flowers by a Malini (flower-girl). He, being a poor Brahmin, could not pay for the flowers, but in place of that he used to read some of his own verses to the Malini. One day there bloomed in the Malini's tank a lily of unparalleled beauty. Plucking it, the Malini offered it to Kalidas. As a reward the poet read to her some verses from the Megha Duta (Cloud Messenger). That poem is an ocean of wit, but every one knows that its opening lines are tasteless. The Malini did not relish them, and being annoyed she rose to go.[32]
The poet Kalidas was given flowers by a Malini (flower girl). Since he was a poor Brahmin, he couldn't pay for the flowers, so instead, he would recite some of his own verses to the Malini. One day, a stunning lily bloomed in the Malini's tank. She picked it and offered it to Kalidas. In return, the poet read her some verses from the Megha Duta (Cloud Messenger). That poem is rich with wit, but everyone knows its opening lines are pretty dull. The Malini didn't like them, and annoyed, she got up to leave.[32]
The poet asked: "Oh! friend Malini, are you going?"
The poet asked, "Oh! friend Malini, are you leaving?"
"Your verses have no flavour," replied the Malini.
"Your verses have no flavor," replied the Malini.
"Malini! you will never reach heaven."
"Malini! You will never reach heaven."
"Why so?"
"Why is that?"
"There is a staircase to heaven. By ascending millions of steps heaven is reached. My poem has also a staircase; these tasteless verses are the steps. If you can't climb these few steps, how will you ascend the heavenly ladder?"
"There’s a staircase to heaven. By going up millions of steps, you can reach it. My poem has a staircase too; these bland verses are the steps. If you can’t manage to climb these few steps, how will you climb the heavenly ladder?"
The Malini then, in fear of losing heaven through the Brahmin's curse, listened to the Megha Duta from beginning to end. She admired the poem; and next day, binding a wreath of flowers in the name of Cupid, she crowned the poet's temples therewith.
The Malini, afraid of losing her place in heaven due to the Brahmin's curse, listened to the Megha Duta from start to finish. She loved the poem; the next day, she made a flower garland in honor of Cupid and placed it on the poet’s head.
This ordinary poem of mine is not heaven; neither has it a staircase of a million steps. Its flavour is faint and the steps are few. These few tasteless chapters are the staircase. If among my readers there is one of the Malini's disposition, I warn him that without climbing these steps he will not arrive at the pith of the story.[33]
This simple poem of mine isn’t anything grand; it doesn’t have a staircase with a million steps. Its flavor is mild, and there are only a few steps. These few flavorless chapters are the staircase. If any of my readers are like Malini, I warn you that without climbing these steps, you won’t get to the heart of the story.[33]
Surja Mukhi's father's house was in Konnagar. Her father was a Kaystha of good position. He was cashier in some house at Calcutta. Surja Mukhi was his only child. In her infancy a Kaystha widow named Srimati lived in her father's house as a servant, and looked after Surja Mukhi. Srimati had one child named Tara Charan, of the same age as Surja Mukhi. With him Surja Mukhi had played, and on account of this childish association she felt towards him the affection of a sister.
Surja Mukhi's dad lived in Konnagar. He was a respected Kaystha and worked as a cashier in a company in Calcutta. Surja Mukhi was their only child. When she was a baby, a Kaystha widow named Srimati worked in her father's house as a servant and took care of Surja Mukhi. Srimati had a child named Tara Charan, who was the same age as Surja Mukhi. They played together, and because of this childhood bond, Surja Mukhi felt a sisterly affection for him.
Srimati was a beautiful woman, and therefore soon fell into trouble. A wealthy man of the village, of evil character, having cast his eyes upon her, she forsook the house of Surja Mukhi's father. Whither she went no one exactly knew, but she did not return. Tara Charan, forsaken by his mother, remained in the house of Surja Mukhi's father, who was a very kind-hearted man, and brought up this deserted boy as his own child; not keeping him in slavery as an unpaid servant, but having him taught to read and write. Tara Charan learned English at a free mission-school.[34] Afterwards Surja Mukhi was married, and some years later her father died. By this time Tara Charan had learned English after a clumsy fashion, but he was not qualified for any business. Rendered homeless by the death of Surja Mukhi's father, he went to her house. At her instigation Nagendra opened a school in the village, and Tara Charan was appointed master. Nowadays, by means of the grant-in-aid system in many villages, sleek-haired, song-singing, harmless Master Babus appear; but at that time such a being as a Master Babu was scarcely to be seen. Consequently, Tara Charan appeared as one of the village gods; especially as it was known in the bazaar that he had read the Citizen of the World, the Spectator, and three books of Euclid. On account of these gifts he was received into the Brahmo Samaj of Debendra Babu, the zemindar of Debipur, and reckoned as one of that Babu's retinue.
Srimati was a beautiful woman, which quickly got her into trouble. A wealthy but wicked man from the village took an interest in her, and she left the house of Surja Mukhi's father. No one knew exactly where she went, but she never came back. Tara Charan, abandoned by his mother, stayed at Surja Mukhi's father's house, who was a kind man and raised this neglected boy as his own; he didn’t treat him like a slave or unpaid servant but had him learn to read and write. Tara Charan learned English at a free mission school.[34] Later, Surja Mukhi got married, and a few years after that, her father passed away. By then, Tara Charan had learned English in a rough way, but he wasn’t qualified for any profession. After Surja Mukhi's father died, he found himself without a home and went to her house. At her suggestion, Nagendra opened a school in the village, and Tara Charan was hired as the teacher. Nowadays, thanks to the grant-in-aid system in many villages, you can find well-groomed, song-singing, harmless Master Babus; but back then, a Master Babu was a rare sight. So, Tara Charan was seen as one of the village's gods, especially since it was known in the marketplace that he had read the Citizen of the World, the Spectator, and three books of Euclid. Because of these accomplishments, he was welcomed into the Brahmo Samaj of Debendra Babu, the zemindar of Debipur, and was considered one of his followers.
Tara Charan wrote many essays on widow-marriage, on the education of women, and against idol-worship; read them weekly in the Samaj, and delivered many discourses beginning with "Oh,[35] most merciful God!" Some of these he took from the Tattwa Bodhini,[3] and some he caused to be written for him by the school pandit. He was forever preaching: "Abandon idol-worship, give choice in marriage, give women education; why do you keep them shut up in a cage? let women come out." There was a special cause for this liberality on the subject of women, inasmuch as in his own house there was no woman. Up to this time he had not married. Surja Mukhi had made great efforts to get him married, but as his mother's story was known in Govindpur, no respectable Kaystha consented to give him his daughter. Many a common, disreputable Kaystha girl he might have had; but Surja Mukhi, regarding Tara Charan as a brother, would not give her consent, since she did not choose to call such a girl sister-in-law. While she was seeking for a respectable Kaystha girl, Nagendra's letter came, describing Kunda Nandini's gifts and beauty. She resolved to give her to Tara Charan in marriage.
Tara Charan wrote many essays on widow marriage, women's education, and against idol worship; he published them weekly in the Samaj and gave numerous talks starting with "Oh,[35] most merciful God!" Some of these he adapted from the Tattwa Bodhini,[3] while others were written for him by the school pandit. He was constantly preaching: "Stop idol worship, allow choices in marriage, and educate women; why keep them trapped like birds? let women be free." There was a particular reason for his progressive views on women: in his own home, there were no women. He had not married up to that point. Surja Mukhi made significant efforts to get him married, but because his mother's story was known in Govindpur, no respectable Kaystha family would agree to give him their daughter. He might have been able to marry many common, disreputable Kaystha girls; however, Surja Mukhi, seeing Tara Charan as a brother, refused to give her consent, as she did not want to call such a girl sister-in-law. While she was searching for a suitable Kaystha girl, Nagendra's letter arrived, detailing Kunda Nandini's attributes and beauty. She decided to arrange a marriage between Kunda Nandini and Tara Charan.


CHAPTER V.
OH! LOTUS-EYED, WHO ART THOU?

unda arrived safely with Nagendra at Govindpur. At the sight of Nagendra's dwelling she became speechless with wonder, for she had never seen one so grand. There were three divisions without and three within. Each division was a large city. The outer mahal (division) was entered by an iron gate, and was surrounded on all sides by a handsome lofty iron railing. From the gate a broad, red, well-metalled path extended, on each side of which were beds of fresh grass that would have formed a paradise for cows. In the midst of[38] each plat was a circle of shrubs, all blooming with variously coloured flowers. In front rose the lofty demi-upper-roomed boita khana (reception-hall), approached by a broad flight of steps, the verandah of which was supported by massive fluted pillars. The floor of the lower part of this house was of marble. Above the parapet, in its centre, an enormous clay lion, with dependent mane, hung out its red tongue. This was Nagendra's boita khana. To left and right of the grass plats stood a row of one-storied buildings, containing on one side the daftar khana (accountant's office) and kacheri (court-house); on the other the storehouse, treasury, and servants' dwellings. On both sides of the gate were the doorkeepers' lodges. This first mahal was named the kacheri bari (house of business); the next to it was the puja mahal (division for worship). The large hall of worship formed one side of the puja mahal; on the other three sides were two-storied houses. No one lived in this mahal. At the festival of Durga it was thronged; but now grass sprouted between the tiles of the court, pigeons frequented the halls,[39] the houses were full of furniture, and the doors were kept locked. Beside this was the thakur bari (room assigned to the family deity): in it on one side was the temple of the gods, the handsome stone-built dancing-hall; on the remaining sides, the kitchen for the gods, the dwelling-rooms of the priests, and a guest-house. In this mahal there was no lack of people. The tribe of priests, with garlands on their necks and sandal-wood marks on their foreheads; a troop of cooks; people bearing baskets of flowers for the altars; some bathing the gods, some ringing bells, chattering, pounding sandal-wood, cooking; men and women servants bearing water, cleaning floors, washing rice, quarrelling with the cooks. In the guest-house an ascetic, with ash-smeared, loose hair, is lying sleeping; one with upraised arm (stiffened thus through years) is distributing drugs and charms to the servants of the house; a white-bearded, red-robed Brahmachari, swinging his chaplet of beads, is reading from a manuscript copy of the Bhagavat-gita in the Nagari character; holy mendicants are quarrelling for their share of ghi[40] and flour. Here a company of emaciated Boiragis, with wreaths of tulsi (a sacred plant) round their necks and the marks of their religion painted on their foreheads, the bead fastened into the knot of hair on their heads shaking with each movement, are beating the drums as they sing:
Unda arrived safely with Nagendra at Govindpur. When she saw Nagendra's home, she was speechless with wonder because she had never seen anything so grand. There were three sections outside and three inside. Each section was like a large city. The outer mahal (section) had an iron gate and was surrounded by a tall, elegant iron railing. From the gate, a wide, red, well-kept path extended, with fresh grass on both sides that would have made a paradise for cows. In the center of each area was a circle of shrubs, all blooming with flowers of various colors. In front stood the tall demi-upper-roomed boita khana (reception hall), accessed by a wide flight of steps supported by massive fluted pillars. The floor of the lower part of this house was made of marble. Above the parapet in the center, a huge clay lion with a flowing mane let out its red tongue. This was Nagendra's boita khana. On either side of the grass areas were rows of single-story buildings, with the daftar khana (accountant's office) and kacheri (court-house) on one side, and the storehouse, treasury, and servants' quarters on the other. On both sides of the gate were the doorkeepers' lodges. This first mahal was called the kacheri bari (house of business); the next one was the puja mahal (section for worship). The large hall of worship formed one side of the puja mahal; on the other three sides were two-story houses. No one lived in this mahal. During the Durga festival, it was crowded, but now grass sprouted between the tiles of the courtyard, pigeons frequented the halls, the houses were filled with furniture, and the doors were locked. Next to this was the thakur bari (room for the family deity), which housed the temple for the gods, a beautiful stone-built dancing hall, and on the other sides were the kitchen for the gods, the priests' living quarters, and a guest house. This mahal had no shortage of people. A group of priests, wearing garlands and sandalwood marks on their foreheads, along with cooks, people carrying baskets of flowers for the altars, some bathing the gods, others ringing bells, chatting, grinding sandalwood, and cooking. Men and women servants were carrying water, cleaning floors, washing rice, and arguing with the cooks. In the guest house, an ascetic with ash-smeared hair lay sleeping; one with an upraised arm (hardened in that position over years) was distributing herbs and charms to the household servants; a white-bearded, red-robed Brahmachari swung his prayer beads while reading from a manuscript of the Bhagavat-gita in Nagari script; and holy mendicants argued over their share of ghi and flour. A group of thin Boiragis, with wreaths of tulsi (a sacred plant) around their necks and religious symbols painted on their foreheads, with beads tied into their hair shaking with each movement, were beating drums as they sang:
"My older brother Dolai was with me."
The wives of the Boiragis, their hair braided in a manner pleasing to their husbands, are singing the tune of Govinda Adhi Kari to the accompaniment of the tambourine. Young Boisnavis singing with elder women of the same class, the middle-aged trying to bring their voices into unison with those of the old. In the midst of the court-yard idle boys fighting, and abusing each other's parents.
The wives of the Boiragis, their hair styled in a way that makes their husbands happy, are singing the song Govinda Adhi Kari along with the tambourine. Young Boisnavis are singing with older women from the same group, while the middle-aged are trying to harmonize with the voices of the older women. In the courtyard, idle boys are fighting and insulting each other's parents.
These three were the outer mahals. Behind these came the three inner ones. The inner mahal behind the kacheri bari was for Nagendra's private use. In that only himself, his wife, and their personal attendants were allowed; also the furniture for their use. This place was new, built[41] by Nagendra himself, and very well arranged. Next to it, and behind the puja bari, came another mahal; this was old, ill-built, the rooms low, small, and dirty. Here was a whole city-full of female relations, mother's sister and mother's cousin, father's sister and cousin; mother's widowed sister, mother's married sister; father's sister's son's wife, mother's sister's son's daughter. All these female relatives cawing day and night like a set of crows in a banian tree; at every moment screams, laughter, quarrelling, bad reasoning, gossip, reproach, the scuffling of boys, the crying of girls. "Bring water!" "Give the clothes!" "Cook the rice!" "The child does not eat!" "Where is the milk?" etc., is heard as an ocean of confused sounds. Next to it, behind the Thakur bari, was the cook-house. Here a woman, having placed the rice-pot on the fire, gathering up her feet, sits gossiping with her neighbour on the details of her son's marriage. Another, endeavouring to light a fire with green wood, her eyes smarting with the smoke, is abusing the gomashta (factor), and producing abundant proof that he[42] has supplied this wet wood to pocket part of the price. Another beauty, throwing fish into the hot oil, closes her eyes and twists her ten fingers, making a grimace, for oil leaping forth has burnt her skin. One having bathed her long hair, plentifully besmeared with oil, braiding it in a curve on the temples and fastening it in a knot on the top of her head, stirs the pulse cooking in an earthen pot, like Krishna prodding the cows with a stick. Here Bami, Kaymi, Gopal's mother, Nipal's mother, are shredding with a big knife vegetable pumpkins, brinjals, the sound of the cutting steel mingling with abuse of the neighbours, of the masters, of everybody: that Golapi has become a widow very young; that Chandi's husband is a great drunkard; that Koylash's husband has secured a fine appointment as writer to the Darogah; that there could not be in the world such a flying journey as that of Gopal, nor such a wicked child as Parvati's; how the English must be of the race of Ravan (the ten-headed king of Ceylon); how Bhagirati had brought Ganga; how Sham Biswas was the lover of the daughter of the[43] Bhattacharjyas; with many other subjects. A dark, stout-bodied woman, placing a large bonti (a fish-cutter) on a heap of ashes in the court, is cutting fish; the kites, frightened at her gigantic size and her quick-handedness, keeping away, yet now and again darting forward to peck at the fish. Here a white-haired woman is bringing water; there one with powerful hand is grinding spices. Here, in the storehouse, a servant, a cook, and the store-keeper are quarrelling together; the store-keeper maintaining, "The ghi (clarified butter) I have given is the right quantity;" the cook disputing it; the servant saying, "We could manage with the quantity you give if you left the storehouse unlocked." In the hope of receiving doles of rice, many children and beggars with their dogs are sitting waiting. The cats do not flatter any one; they watch their opportunity, steal in, and help themselves. Here a cow without an owner is feasting with closed eyes upon the husks of pumpkins, other vegetables, and fruit.
These three were the outer mahals. Behind these were the three inner ones. The inner mahal behind the kacheri bari was for Nagendra's private use. Only he, his wife, and their personal attendants were allowed in there, along with furniture for their use. This place was new, built[41] by Nagendra himself, and very well organized. Next to it, behind the puja bari, was another mahal; this one was old, poorly constructed, with low, small, and dirty rooms. Here lived a whole city full of female relatives: mother's sister and mother's cousin, father's sister and cousin; mother's widowed sister, mother's married sister; father's sister's son's wife, mother's sister's son's daughter. All these women cawed day and night like a group of crows in a banyan tree; every moment there were screams, laughter, arguments, bad reasoning, gossip, reproach, the scuffling of boys, and the crying of girls. "Bring water!" "Give me the clothes!" "Cook the rice!" "The child isn’t eating!" "Where’s the milk?" etc., created a chaotic mix of sounds. Next to it, behind the Thakur bari, was the cookhouse. Here, a woman, after placing the rice pot on the fire, tucked her feet up and sat gossiping with her neighbor about the details of her son's marriage. Another woman, trying to light a fire with green wood, her eyes stinging from the smoke, was scolding the gomashta (factor), providing plenty of evidence that he[42] had supplied this wet wood to pocket part of the price. Another woman, throwing fish into hot oil, closed her eyes and twisted her ten fingers, grimacing because the splattering oil had burned her skin. One woman, after bathing her long hair, which was heavily oiled, braided it along her temples and tied it in a knot on top of her head, stirring the cooking lentils in an earthen pot like Krishna herding cows. Here, Bami, Kaymi, Gopal's mother, Nipal's mother, were chopping vegetable pumpkins and brinjals with a big knife, the sound of steel cutting blending with their complaints about the neighbors, the masters, and everyone else: that Golapi had become a widow at a young age; that Chandi's husband was a big drunk; that Koylash's husband had landed a great job as a writer to the Darogah; that there was no journey in the world as fast as Gopal's, nor a child as troublesome as Parvati's; how the English must be descendants of Ravan (the ten-headed king of Ceylon); how Bhagirati had brought Ganga; how Sham Biswas was in love with the daughter of the[43] Bhattacharjyas; and many other topics. A dark, stout woman was placing a large bonti (fish cutter) on a pile of ashes in the courtyard, cutting fish; the kites, scared of her size and speed, stayed away but occasionally darted in to steal a peck at the fish. A white-haired woman was bringing water; another with strong hands was grinding spices. In the storage room, a servant, a cook, and the storekeeper were arguing; the storekeeper insisted, "The ghi (clarified butter) I gave is the right amount;" the cook disagreed; the servant said, "We could manage with what you give if you left the storehouse unlocked." Hoping for handouts of rice, many children and beggars with their dogs were sitting and waiting. The cats didn’t show any favoritism; they watched their chance, sneaked in, and helped themselves. Here, a cow without an owner was feasting with closed eyes on pumpkin husks, other vegetables, and fruit.
Behind these three inner mahals is the flower-garden; and further yet a broad tank, blue as the[44] sky. This tank is walled in. The inner house (the women's) has three divisions, and in the flower-garden is a private path, and at each end of the path two doors; these doors are private, they give entrance to the three mahals of the inner house. Outside the house are the stables, the elephant-house, the kennels, the cow-house, the aviaries, etc.
Behind these three inner mahals is a flower garden; and even further, there’s a large tank, as blue as the[44] sky. This tank is enclosed by walls. The inner house (the women's quarters) has three sections, and in the flower garden, there's a private path with two doors at each end; these doors are exclusive and lead to the three mahals of the inner house. Outside the house are the stables, the elephant house, the dog kennels, the cow house, the aviaries, and so on.
Kunda Nandini, full of astonishment at Nagendra's unbounded wealth, was borne in a palanquin to the inner apartments, where she saluted Surja Mukhi, who received her with a blessing.
Kunda Nandini, amazed by Nagendra's immense wealth, was carried in a palanquin to the inner rooms, where she greeted Surja Mukhi, who welcomed her with a blessing.
Having recognized in Nagendra the likeness of the man she had seen in her dream, Kunda Nandini doubted whether his wife would not resemble the female figure she had seen later; but the sight of Surja Mukhi removed this doubt. Surja Mukhi was of a warm, golden colour, like the full moon; the figure in the dream was dark. Surja Mukhi's eyes were beautiful, but not like those in the dream. They were long deer-eyes, extending to the side hair; the eye-brows joined in a beautiful curve over the dilated, densely black[45] pupils, full but steady. The eyes of the dark woman in the dream were not so enchanting. Then Surja Mukhi's features were not similar. The dream figure was dwarfish; Surja Mukhi rather tall, her figure swaying with the beauty of the honeysuckle creeper. The dream figure was beautiful, but Surja Mukhi was a hundredfold more so. The dream figure was not more than twenty years of age; Surja Mukhi was nearly twenty-six. Kunda saw clearly that there was no resemblance between the two. Surja Mukhi conversed pleasantly with Kunda, and summoned the attendants, to the chief among whom she said, "This is Kunda with whom I shall give Tara Charan in marriage; therefore see that you treat her as my brother's wife."
Having recognized in Nagendra the resemblance to the man she had seen in her dream, Kunda Nandini wondered if his wife would look like the female figure she had seen later; but seeing Surja Mukhi cleared that doubt. Surja Mukhi had a warm, golden complexion, like the full moon; the figure in the dream was dark. Surja Mukhi's eyes were beautiful, but not like those in the dream. They were long, deer-like eyes that extended to her temples; her eyebrows arched beautifully over her large, deep black[45] pupils, which were full yet steady. The eyes of the dark woman in the dream were not as captivating. Furthermore, Surja Mukhi's features were different. The dream figure was short; Surja Mukhi was rather tall, her figure swaying gracefully like a honeysuckle vine. The dream figure was pretty, but Surja Mukhi was a hundred times more so. The dream figure seemed no older than twenty; Surja Mukhi was nearly twenty-six. Kunda realized there was no resemblance between the two. Surja Mukhi chatted pleasantly with Kunda and called for the attendants, telling the chief among them, "This is Kunda, whom I will marry to Tara Charan; so make sure you treat her like my brother's wife."
The servant expressed her assent, and took Kunda aside with her to another place. At sight of her Kunda's flesh crept; a cold moisture came over her from head to foot. The female figure which Kunda in her dream had seen her mother's fingers trace upon the heavens, this servant was that lotus-eyed, dark-complexioned woman.[46]
The servant nodded in agreement and led Kunda to a different spot. Just seeing her made Kunda shiver; a chill spread over her body from head to toe. The woman with lotus-like eyes and dark skin that Kunda had seen in her dream, traced by her mother’s fingers in the sky, was this very servant.[46]
Kunda, agitated with fear, breathing with difficulty, asked, "Who are you?"
Kunda, shaking with fear and struggling to breathe, asked, "Who are you?"
The servant answered, "My name is Hira."
The servant said, "I'm Hira."


CHAPTER VI.
THE READER HAS CAUSE FOR GREAT DISPLEASURE.

t this point the reader will be much annoyed. It is a custom with novelists to conclude with a wedding, but we are about to begin with the marriage of Kunda Nandini. By another custom that has existed from ancient times, whoever shall marry the heroine must be extremely handsome, adorned with all virtues, himself a hero, and devoted to his mistress. Poor Tara Charan possessed no such advantages; his beauty consisted in a copper-tinted complexion and a snub nose; his heroism found exercise only in the[48] schoolroom; and as for his love, I cannot say how much he had for Kunda Nandini, but he had some for a pet monkey.
At this point, the reader is likely to be quite annoyed. It's a common tradition among novelists to wrap things up with a wedding, but we’re going to kick things off with the marriage of Kunda Nandini. According to an ancient tradition, whoever marries the heroine must be extremely handsome, embody all virtues, be a hero himself, and be devoted to his beloved. Poor Tara Charan had none of those traits; his beauty consisted of a copper-toned complexion and a snub nose; his heroism only showed up in the[48] classroom; and as for his love, I can’t say how much he felt for Kunda Nandini, but he definitely had some affection for a pet monkey.
However that may be, soon after Kunda Nandini's arrival at the house of Nagendra she was married to Tara Charan. Tara Charan took home his beautiful wife; but in marrying a beautiful wife he brought himself into a difficulty.
However that may be, soon after Kunda Nandini arrived at Nagendra's house, she got married to Tara Charan. Tara Charan took his beautiful wife home, but marrying such a beautiful woman brought him some trouble.
The reader will remember that Tara Charan had delivered some essays in the house of Debendra Babu on the subjects of women's education and the opening of the zenana. In the discussions that ensued, the Master Babu had said vauntingly: "Should the opportunity ever be given me, I will be the first to set an example of reform in these matters. Should I marry, I will bring my wife out into society."
The reader will remember that Tara Charan had given some essays at Debendra Babu's house on women's education and the opening of the zenana. In the discussions that followed, Master Babu confidently stated, "If I'm ever given the chance, I will be the first to set an example of reform in these areas. If I marry, I will bring my wife out into society."
Now he was married, and the fame of Kunda's beauty had spread through the district. All the neighbours now, quoting an old song, said, "Where now is his pledge?" Debendra said, "What, are you now also in the troop of old fools? Why do you not introduce us to your wife?"[49]
Now he was married, and the word about Kunda's beauty had traveled throughout the area. All the neighbors, referencing an old song, said, "Where is his promise now?" Debendra responded, "What, are you also among the group of old fools? Why don’t you introduce us to your wife?"[49]
Tara Charan was covered with shame; he could not escape from Debendra's banter and taunts. He consented to allow Debendra to make the acquaintance of his wife. Then fear arose lest Surja Mukhi should be displeased. A year passed in evasion and procrastination; when, seeing that this could be carried on no longer, he made an excuse that his house was in need of repair, and sent Kunda Nandini to Nagendra's house. When the repairs of the house were completed, Kunda Nandini returned home. A few days after, Debendra, with some of his friends, called upon Tara Charan, and jeered him for his false boasting. Driven thus, as it were, into a corner, Tara Charan persuaded Kunda Nandini to dress in suitable style, and brought her forth to converse with Debendra Babu. How could she do so? She remained standing veiled before him for a few seconds, then fled weeping. But Debendra was enchanted with her youthful grace and beauty. He never forgot it.
Tara Charan was overwhelmed with shame; he couldn't escape Debendra's teasing and jeers. He reluctantly agreed to let Debendra meet his wife. But then he started worrying that Surja Mukhi might not be happy about it. A year went by with him dodging the situation and delaying things. When he realized he could no longer avoid it, he made up an excuse that his house needed repairs and sent Kunda Nandini to Nagendra's house. Once the repairs were finished, Kunda Nandini came back home. A few days later, Debendra showed up with some friends and mocked Tara Charan for his empty bragging. Feeling cornered, Tara Charan convinced Kunda Nandini to dress appropriately and brought her out to talk to Debendra Babu. But how could she do that? She stood there veiled for a few seconds and then ran away in tears. However, Debendra was captivated by her youthful grace and beauty. He never forgot it.
Soon after that, some kind of festival was held in Debendra's house, and a little girl was sent[50] thence to Kunda to invite her attendance. But Surja Mukhi hearing of this, forbade her to accept the invitation, and she did not go. Later, Debendra again going to Tara Charan's house, had an interview with Kunda. Surja Mukhi hearing of this through others, gave to Tara Charan such a scolding, that from that time Debendra's visits were stopped.
Soon after that, there was some kind of festival at Debendra's house, and a little girl was sent[50] from there to Kunda to invite her to come. But Surja Mukhi heard about this and told her not to accept the invitation, so she didn’t go. Later, when Debendra visited Tara Charan's house again, he met with Kunda. When Surja Mukhi found out about this from others, she gave Tara Charan such a scolding that from that point on, Debendra's visits were stopped.
In this manner three years passed after the marriage; then Kunda Nandini became a widow. Tara Charan died of fever. Surja Mukhi took Kunda to live with her, and selling the house she had given to Tara Charan, gave the proceeds in Government paper to Kunda.
In this way, three years went by after the marriage; then Kunda Nandini became a widow. Tara Charan passed away from a fever. Surja Mukhi brought Kunda to live with her, and after selling the house she had given to Tara Charan, she handed the proceeds in government bonds to Kunda.
The reader is no doubt much displeased, but in fact the tale is only begun. Of the poison tree the seed only has thus far been sown.
The reader is probably quite upset, but the story has just started. The seed of the poison tree has only just been planted.


CHAPTER VII.
HARIDASI BOISNAVI.

he widow Kunda Nandini passed some time in Nagendra's house. One afternoon the whole household of ladies were sitting together in the other division of the house, all occupied according to their tastes in the simple employment of village women. All ages were there, from the youngest girl to the grey-haired woman. One was binding another's hair, the other suffering it to be bound; one submitting to have her white hairs extracted, another extracting them by the aid of a grain of rice; one beauty sewing together shreds of cloth into a quilt for her boy, another suckling her[52] child; one lovely being dressing the plaits of her hair; another beating her child, who now cried aloud, now quietly sobbed, by turns. Here one is sewing carpet-work, another leaning over it in admiring examination. There one of artistic taste, thinking of some one's marriage, is drawing a design on the wooden seats to be used by the bridal pair. One learned lady is reading Dasu Rai's poetry. An old woman is delighting the ears of her neighbours with complaints of her son; a humorous young one, in a voice half bursting with laughter, relates in the ears of her companions whose husbands are absent some jocose story of her husband's, to beguile the pain of separation. Some are reproaching the Grihini (house-mistress), some the Korta (master), some the neighbours; some reciting their own praises. She who may have received a gentle scolding in the morning from Surja Mukhi on account of her stupidity, is bringing forward many examples of her remarkable acuteness of understanding. She in whose cooking the flavours can never be depended upon, is dilating at great length upon[53] her proficiency in the art. She whose husband is proverbial in the village for his ignorance, is astounding her companions by her praises of his superhuman learning. She whose children are dark and repulsive-looking, is pluming herself on having given birth to jewels of beauty. Surja Mukhi was not of the company. She was a little proud, and did not sit much with these people; if she came amongst them her presence was a restraint upon the enjoyment of the rest. All feared her somewhat, and were reserved towards her. Kunda Nandini associated with them; she was amongst them now, teaching a little boy his letters at his mother's request. During the lesson the pupil's eyes were fixed upon the sweetmeat in another child's hand, consequently his progress was not great. At this moment there appeared amongst them a Boisnavi (female mendicant), exclaiming, "Jai Radhika!"[4] (Victory to Radhika).
The widow Kunda Nandini spent some time at Nagendra's house. One afternoon, all the ladies of the household were gathered in a separate part of the house, each engaged in activities typical of village women. They ranged in age from the youngest girl to the elderly woman. One was braiding another's hair, while the other let herself be braided; one was enduring the plucking of her white hairs, another was removing them using a grain of rice; one beautiful woman was stitching pieces of cloth together into a quilt for her son, while another was nursing her child; one lovely person was styling her hair, and another was scolding her child, who alternated between crying loudly and quietly sobbing. One woman was sewing a carpet, while another admired her work. In another corner, an artistic soul, thinking about someone's wedding, was drawing a design on the wooden seats for the bride and groom. A knowledgeable lady was reading Dasu Rai's poetry. An elderly woman entertained her neighbors with complaints about her son; a humorous young woman, half-laughing, shared a funny story about her husband to lighten the mood during their time apart. Some were criticizing the house-mistress, others the master, some were talking about the neighbors, while some were singing their own praises. One woman who had received a gentle scolding that morning from Surja Mukhi for her foolishness was now citing many examples of her sharp wit. The one whose cooking was notoriously unpredictable was boastfully discussing her cooking skills. The woman whose husband was infamous for his ignorance was impressing her friends by extolling his supposed great intelligence. The mother of less-than-attractive children was bragging about having given birth to beautiful gems. Surja Mukhi wasn’t among them. She was somewhat proud and didn’t often mix with these women; when she did join them, her presence dampened the mood of the others. Everyone was slightly intimidated by her and treated her with reserve. Kunda Nandini was with them; she was currently teaching a little boy his letters at his mother's request. During the lesson, the boy’s gaze was fixed on the sweet treat in another child’s hand, so his learning was slow. At that moment, a female mendicant appeared among them, exclaiming, "Victory to Radhika!"
[4] Wife of Krishna.
Krishna's wife.
A constant stream of guests was served in Nagendra's Thakur bari, and every Sunday quantities of rice were distributed in the same [54]place, but neither Boisnavis nor others were allowed to come to the women's apartments to beg; accordingly, on hearing the cry "Jai Radha!" in these forbidden precincts, one of the inmates exclaimed: "What, woman! do you venture to intrude here? go to the Thakur bari." But even as she spoke, turning to look at the Boisnavi, she could not finish her speech, but said instead: "Oh, ma, what Boisnavi are you?"
A steady flow of guests was welcomed in Nagendra's Thakur bari, and every Sunday, a lot of rice was given out in the same [54] place, but neither Boisnavis nor anyone else was allowed to enter the women's quarters to beg. So, when someone heard the shout "Jai Radha!" in these restricted areas, one of the residents exclaimed: "What are you doing here, woman? Go to the Thakur bari." But even as she spoke and turned to look at the Boisnavi, she couldn't finish her sentence and instead said: "Oh, ma, which Boisnavi are you?"
Looking up, all saw with astonishment that the Boisnavi was young and of exceeding beauty; in that group of beautiful women there was none, excepting Kunda Nandini, so beautiful as she. Her trembling lips, well-formed nose, large lotus-eyes, pencilled brows, smooth, well-shaped forehead, arms like the lotus-stalk, and complexion like the champak flower, were rare among women. But had there been present any critic of loveliness, he would have said there was a want of sweetness in her beauty, while in her walk and in her movements there was a masculine character.
Looking up, everyone was amazed to see that the Boisnavi was young and exceptionally beautiful; among that group of beautiful women, only Kunda Nandini was as lovely as she was. Her trembling lips, well-shaped nose, large lotus-like eyes, groomed brows, smooth, well-formed forehead, arms like lotus stalks, and a complexion like the champak flower were quite rare among women. However, if there had been a beauty critic present, they might have pointed out that there was a lack of softness in her beauty, while her walk and movements had a more masculine quality.
One of the elder women addressed her saying, "Who are you?"
One of the older women asked her, "Who are you?"
The Boisnavi replied, "My name is Haridasi. Will the ladies like a song?"
The Boisnavi replied, "My name is Haridasi. Do the ladies want to hear a song?"
The cry, "Yes, yes! sing!" sounded on all sides from old and young. Raising her tambourine, the Boisnavi seated herself near the ladies, where Kunda was teaching the little boy. Kunda was very fond of music; on hearing that the Boisnavi would sing she came nearer. Her pupil seized the opportunity to snatch the sweetmeat from the other child's hand, and eat it himself.
The call, "Yes, yes! Sing!" echoed from everyone, young and old. Lifting her tambourine, the Boisnavi took a seat next to the ladies, where Kunda was teaching the little boy. Kunda loved music a lot; when she heard the Boisnavi would sing, she moved closer. Her student seized the chance to grab the sweet treat from the other child's hand and eat it himself.
The Boisnavi asking what she should sing, the listeners gave a number of different orders. One called for the strains of Govinda Adhikari, another Gopale Ure. She who was reading Dasu Rai's poem desired to have it sung. Two or three asked for the old stories about Krishna; they were[56] divided as to whether they would hear about the companions or about the separation. Some wanted to hear of his herding the cows in his youth. One shameless girl called out, "If you do not sing such and such a passage I will not listen." One mere child, by way of teaching the Boisnavi, sang some nonsensical syllables. The Boisnavi, listening to the different demands, gave a momentary glance at Kunda, saying: "Have you no commands to give?"
The Boisnavi asked what she should sing, and the audience gave a variety of requests. One person wanted to hear Govinda Adhikari, while another requested Gopale Ure. The one reading Dasu Rai's poem wanted it performed. Two or three people wanted the old stories about Krishna; they were[56] divided on whether to hear about his companions or his separation. Some were interested in hearing about his childhood as a cowherd. One bold girl shouted, "If you don't sing this specific part, I won't listen." A little kid, trying to teach the Boisnavi, sang some goofy syllables. The Boisnavi, taking in the different requests, briefly glanced at Kunda and asked, "Don't you have any requests?"
Kunda, ashamed, bent her head smiling, but did not speak aloud; she whispered in the ear of a companion, "Mention some hymn."
Kunda, feeling embarrassed, lowered her head with a smile but didn’t say anything out loud; she whispered to a friend, "Mention a hymn."
The companion said, "Kunda desires that you will sing a hymn." The Boisnavi then began a hymn. Kunda, seeing that the Boisnavi had neglected all other commands to obey hers, was much abashed. Haridasi, striking gently on her tambourine as if in sport, recited in a gentle voice some few notes like the murmuring of a bee in early spring, or a bashful bride's first loving speech to her husband. Then suddenly she produced from that insignificant tambourine, as[57] though with the fingers of a powerful musician, sounds like the crashing of the clouds in thunder, making the frames of her hearers shrink within them as she sang in tones more melodious than those of the Apsharas (celestial singing women).
The companion said, "Kunda wants you to sing a hymn." The Boisnavi then started a hymn. Kunda, noticing that the Boisnavi had ignored all other requests to follow hers, felt quite embarrassed. Haridasi, playfully tapping her tambourine, softly recited a few notes like a bee buzzing in early spring or a shy bride's first sweet words to her husband. Then, all of a sudden, she produced from that simple tambourine, as if she had the hands of an incredible musician, sounds like the rumbling of thunder, making the audience's hearts shrink as she sang in tones more beautiful than those of the Apsharas (celestial singing women).
The ladies, astonished and enchanted, heard the Boisnavi's unequalled voice filling the court with sound that ascended to the skies. What could secluded women understand of the method of that singing? An intelligent person would have comprehended that this perfect singing was not due to natural gifts alone. The Boisnavi, whoever she might be, had received a thorough scientific training in music, and, though young, she was very proficient.
The women, amazed and captivated, listened as the Boisnavi's incredible voice filled the court, rising up to the heavens. What could sheltered women know about the technique behind that singing? A smart person would recognize that this flawless performance wasn’t just a natural talent. The Boisnavi, whoever she was, had received extensive formal training in music, and even though she was young, she was extremely skilled.
The Boisnavi, having finished her song, was urged by the ladies to sing again. Haridasi, looking with thirsty eyes at Kunda, sang the following song from Krishna's address to Radhika:
The Boisnavi, after finishing her song, was encouraged by the ladies to sing again. Haridasi, gazing longingly at Kunda, sang the following song from Krishna's words to Radhika:
THE BOISNAVI'S SONG.
THE BOISNAVI'S SONG.
I arrive eagerly at this place;
Let me, oh Rai! hold your feet.
[58]To calm your sullen anger,
So I show up in unusual clothes;
Revive me, Radha, speak kindly,
Holding your feet, I would seek my home.
To capture a ray of your beautiful form I wander from door to door with my flute; When your gentle name is whispered softly My eyes suddenly overflow with tears.
If you won't speak my pardon I'll search the banks of the Jumna stream,
I will break my flute and give up my life; Oh! stop your anger, and end the conflict. I’ve set aside the joys of Braj. A slave at your feet to serve; I’ll tie your anklets around my neck, "I'll find refuge in the stream of Jumna."
The song over, the Boisnavi, looking at Kunda, said, "Singing has made me thirsty; give me some water."
The song ended, the Boisnavi, looking at Kunda, said, "I'm thirsty from singing; please get me some water."
Kunda brought water in a vessel; but the Boisnavi said, "I will not touch your vessel; come near and pour some water into my hands. I was not born a Boisnavi." By this she gave it to be understood that she was formerly of some unholy caste, and had since become a Boisnavi.
Kunda brought water in a container, but the Boisnavi said, "I won't use your container; come closer and pour some water into my hands. I wasn't born a Boisnavi." By saying this, she made it clear that she used to belong to an unholy caste and had since become a Boisnavi.
In reply to her words, Kunda went behind her so[59] as to pour the water into her hands. They were at such a distance from the rest that words spoken gently could not be heard by any of them. Kunda poured the water, and the Boisnavi washed her hands and face.
In response to her words, Kunda moved behind her to pour water into her hands. They were far enough away from the others that gentle whispers wouldn't reach them. Kunda poured the water, and the Boisnavi washed her hands and face.
While thus engaged the latter murmured, "Are you not Kunda?"
While doing this, the latter murmured, "Aren't you Kunda?"
In astonishment Kunda replied, "Why do you ask?"
In surprise, Kunda replied, "Why are you asking?"
"Have you ever seen your mother-in-law?"
"Have you ever met your mother-in-law?"
"No."
"Nope."
Kunda had heard that her mother-in-law, having lost her good name, had left the place.
Kunda had heard that her mother-in-law, after losing her reputation, had left the area.
Then said the Boisnavi: "Your mother-in-law is here now. She is in my house, and is crying bitterly to be allowed to see you for once. She dare not show her face to the mistress of this house. Why should you not go with me to see her? Notwithstanding her fault, she is still your mother-in-law."
Then the Boisnavi said, "Your mother-in-law is here now. She's in my house, and she's crying hard to see you just once. She can't bring herself to face the lady of this house. Why don't you come with me to see her? Despite her mistakes, she is still your mother-in-law."
Although Kunda was simple, she understood quite well that she should not acknowledge any connection with such a relation. Therefore she[60] merely shook her head at the Boisnavi's words and refused her assent. But the Boisnavi would not take a refusal; again she urged the matter.
Although Kunda was straightforward, she understood clearly that she shouldn’t admit to any connection with such a relationship. So she[60] simply shook her head at the Boisnavi's words and declined to agree. But the Boisnavi wouldn’t accept a no; she pressed the issue again.
Kunda replied, "I cannot go without the Grihini's permission."
Kunda replied, "I can't go without the Grihini's permission."
This Haridasi forbade. "You must not speak to the house-mistress, she will not let you go; it may be she will send for your Sasuri (mother-in-law). In that case your mother-in-law would flee the country."
This Haridasi warned, "You shouldn't talk to the house-mistress; she won’t let you leave. She might even call your Sasuri (mother-in-law). If that happens, your mother-in-law might have to escape the country."
The more the Boisnavi insisted, the more Kunda refused to go without the Grihini's permission.
The more the Boisnavi pushed, the more Kunda refused to leave without the Grihini's permission.
Haridasi having no other resource, said: "Very well, put the thing nicely to the Grihini; I will come another day and take you. Mind you put it prudently, and shed some tears also, else she will not consent."
Haridasi, having no other options, said: "Alright, present it well to the Grihini; I’ll come back another day and take you. Make sure you do it thoughtfully, and shed a few tears too, or else she won’t agree."
Even to this Kunda did not consent; she would not say either "yes" or "no."
Even then, Kunda did not agree; she wouldn’t say either “yes” or “no.”
Haridasi, having finished purifying her face and hands, turned to the ladies and asked for contributions. At this moment Surja Mukhi came amongst them, the desultory talk ceased, and the[61] younger women, all pretending some occupation, sat down.
Haridasi, having finished washing her face and hands, turned to the women and asked for donations. At that moment, Surja Mukhi joined them, the casual conversation stopped, and the[61] younger women, all pretending to be busy, sat down.
Surja Mukhi, examining the Boisnavi from head to foot, inquired, "Who are you?"
Surja Mukhi, looking over the Boisnavi from head to toe, asked, "Who are you?"
An aunt of Nagendra's explained: "She is a Boisnavi who came to sing. I never heard such beautiful singing! Will you let her sing for you? Sing something about the goddesses."
An aunt of Nagendra's explained: "She is a Boisnavi who came to sing. I've never heard such beautiful singing! Will you let her sing for you? Sing something about the goddesses."
Haridasi, having sung a beautiful piece about Sham, Surja Mukhi, enchanted, dismissed her with a handsome present. The Boisnavi, making a profound salute, cast one more glance at Kunda and went away. Once out of the range of Surja Mukhi's eyes, she made a few gentle taps on the tambourine, singing softly—
Haridasi, after singing a beautiful piece about Sham, enchanted Surja Mukhi and sent her away with a generous gift. The Boisnavi, giving a deep bow, took one last look at Kunda before leaving. Once out of Surja Mukhi's sight, she gave a few light taps on the tambourine, singing softly—
I’ll give you honey to eat and golden clothes to wear; I'll fill your flask with perfume,
And your jar of rosewater,
"Your box filled with spice, made by my own hand."
The Boisnavi being gone, the women could talk of nothing else for some time. First they praised her highly, then began to point out her defects.[62]
The Boisnavi having left, the women couldn’t discuss anything else for a while. At first, they spoke highly of her, but then they started to highlight her flaws.[62]
Biraj said, "She is beautiful, but her nose is somewhat flat."
Biraj said, "She's beautiful, but her nose is kind of flat."
Bama remarked, "Her complexion is too pale."
Bama said, "Her skin is too pale."
Chandra Mukhi added, "Her hair is like tow."
Chandra Mukhi added, "Her hair is like rough rope."
Kapal said, "Her forehead is too high."
Kapal said, "Her forehead is too high."
Kamala said, "Her lips are thick."
Kamala said, "Her lips are full."
Harani observed, "Her figure is very wooden."
Harani remarked, "Her figure looks very stiff."
Pramada added, "The woman's bust is like that of a play actor, it has no grace."
Pramada added, "The woman's figure is like that of an actor, it has no elegance."
In this manner it soon appeared that the beautiful Boisnavi was of unparalleled ugliness.
In this way, it quickly became clear that the beautiful Boisnavi was exceptionally ugly.
Then Lalita said, "Whatever her looks may be, she sings beautifully."
Then Lalita said, "No matter what she looks like, she sings beautifully."
But even this was not admitted. Chandra Mukhi said the singing was coarse; Mukta Keshi confirmed this criticism.
But even this was not accepted. Chandra Mukhi said the singing was rough; Mukta Keshi agreed with this criticism.
Ananga said, "The woman does not know any songs; she could not even give us one of Dasu Rai's songs."
Ananga said, "The woman doesn't know any songs; she couldn't even give us one of Dasu Rai's songs."
Kanak said, "She does not understand time."
Kanak said, "She doesn't get time."
Thus it appeared that Haridasi Boisnavi was not only extremely ugly, but that her singing was of the worst description.
Thus it appeared that Haridasi Boisnavi was not only very unattractive, but that her singing was terrible.


CHAPTER VIII.
THE BABU.

aridasi Boisnavi, having left the house of the Datta family, went to Debipur. At this place there is a flower-garden surrounded by painted iron railings. It is well stocked with fruit trees and flowering shrubs. In the centre is a tank, upon the edge of which stands a garden-house. Entering a private room in this house, Haridasi threw off her dress. Suddenly that dense mass of hair fell from the head; the locks were borrowed. The bust also fell away; it was made of cloth. After putting on suitable apparel and removing[64] the Boisnavi garments, there stood forth a strikingly handsome young man of about five and twenty years of age. Having no hair on his face he looked quite a youth; in feature he was very handsome. This young man was Debendra Babu, of whom we have before had some slight knowledge.
Haridasi Boisnavi, after leaving the Datta family's house, headed to Debipur. There, a flower garden surrounded by painted iron railings awaited. It was filled with fruit trees and flowering shrubs. At the center, there was a tank, and beside it stood a garden house. When she entered a private room in this house, Haridasi took off her dress. Suddenly, her thick hair fell away; the locks were fake. The bodice also came off; it was made of cloth. After putting on appropriate clothing and removing [64] the Boisnavi garments, there emerged a strikingly handsome young man around twenty-five years old. With no facial hair, he appeared quite youthful, and his features were very attractive. This young man was Debendra Babu, whom we've previously encountered to some extent.
Debendra and Nagendra were sprung from the same family, but between the two branches there had been feud for successive generations, so that the members of the Debipur family were not on speaking terms with those of Govindpur. From generation to generation there had been lawsuits between the two houses. At length, in an important suit, the grandfather of Nagendra had defeated the grandfather of Debendra, and since that time the Debipur family had been powerless. All their money was swallowed up in law expenses, and the Govindpur house had bought up all their estates. From that time the position of the Debipur family had declined, that of the other increased, the two branches no longer united.
Debendra and Nagendra came from the same family, but there had been a feud between the two branches for many generations, so the members of the Debipur family weren’t on speaking terms with those from Govindpur. For years, there had been lawsuits between the two families. Eventually, in a major case, Nagendra's grandfather defeated Debendra's grandfather, and since then, the Debipur family had fallen into disarray. All their money was drained away by legal fees, and the Govindpur family had acquired all their properties. Since that time, the Debipur family's status declined while the other family's rose, and the two branches became more divided.
Debendra's father had sought in one way to restore the fallen fortunes of his house. Another[65] zemindar, named Ganesh, dwelt in the Haripur district; he had one unmarried daughter, Hembati, who was given to Debendra in marriage. Hembati had many virtues; she was ugly, ill-tempered, unamiable, selfish. Up to the time of his marriage with her, Debendra's character had been without stain. He had been very studious, and was by nature steady and truth-loving. But that marriage had been fatal to him. When Debendra came to years of discretion he perceived that on account of his wife's disposition there was no hope of domestic happiness for him. With manhood there arose in him a love for beauty, but in his own house this was denied to him; with manhood there came a desire for conjugal affection, but the mere sight of the unamiable Hembati quenched the desire. Putting happiness out of the question, Debendra perceived that it would be difficult to stay in the house to endure the venom of Hembati's tongue. One day Hembati poured forth abuse on her husband; he had endured much, he could endure no more, he dragged Hembati by the hair and kicked her. From that day, deserting[66] his home, he went to Calcutta, leaving orders that a small house should be built for him in the garden. Before this occurred the father of Debendra had died, therefore he was independent. In Calcutta he plunged into vicious pursuits to allay his unsatisfied desires, and then strove to wash away his heart's reproaches in wine; after that he ceased to feel any remorse, he took delight in vice. When he had learned what Calcutta could teach him in regard to luxury, Debendra returned to his native place, and, taking up his abode in the garden-house, gave himself up to the indulgence of his recently acquired tastes. Debendra had learned many peculiar fashions in Calcutta; on returning to Debipur he called himself a Reformer. First he established a Brahmo Samaj; many such Brahmos as Tara Charan were attracted to it, and to the speech-making there was no limit. He also thought of opening a female school; but this required too much effort, he could not do it. About widow marriage he was very zealous. One or two such marriages had been arranged, the widows being of low caste; but the credit of these was due,[67] not to him, but to the contracting parties. He had been of one mind with Tara Charan about breaking the chains of the zenana; both had said, "Let women come out." In this matter Debendra was very successful, but then this emancipation had in his mind a special meaning.
Debendra's father had tried to restore the fallen fortunes of their family in one way. Another zemindar, named Ganesh, lived in the Haripur district; he had one unmarried daughter, Hembati, who was married to Debendra. Hembati had many qualities; she was unattractive, bad-tempered, unfriendly, and selfish. Up until his marriage with her, Debendra's character was unblemished. He had been very studious, and by nature was steady and truth-loving. But that marriage proved disastrous for him. As Debendra matured, he realized that because of his wife's nature, there was no hope for happiness at home. With manhood came a desire for beauty, but he found none in his own home; with maturity also came a wish for marital affection, but just the sight of the unpleasing Hembati extinguished that desire. Setting aside happiness, Debendra recognized that it would be hard to stay in the house and endure Hembati's biting words. One day, Hembati unleashed her anger on her husband; he had put up with so much, but could take no more: he grabbed her by the hair and kicked her. From that day on, he left his home for Calcutta, ordering a small house to be built for him in the garden. By then, Debendra's father had passed away, making him independent. In Calcutta, he threw himself into a life of vice to soothe his unfulfilled desires, and then tried to drown his guilt in alcohol; after that, he lost all sense of remorse and began to enjoy his vices. Once he had absorbed all that Calcutta could teach him about luxury, Debendra returned to his hometown and settled into the garden-house, fully indulging in his new tastes. Debendra had picked up many unusual habits in Calcutta; upon returning to Debipur, he referred to himself as a Reformer. First, he set up a Brahmo Samaj; many Brahmos like Tara Charan were drawn to it, and the speeches were endless. He also contemplated starting a school for girls; however, that required too much effort and he couldn't manage it. He was quite passionate about widow remarriage. A couple of these marriages had taken place, with the widows being of lower caste; yet the credit for these belonged, not to him, but to those involved in the marriages. He shared Tara Charan's views on breaking the restrictions of the zenana; both had declared, "Let women come out." In this endeavor, Debendra found considerable success, but to him, this emancipation held a specific meaning.
When Debendra, on his return from Govindpur, had thrown off his disguise and resumed his natural appearance, he took his seat in the next room. His servant, having prepared the pain-relieving huka, placed the snake in front of him. Debendra spent some time in the service of that fatigue-destroying goddess, Tobacco. He is not worthy to be called a man who does not know the luxury of tobacco. Oh, satisfier of the hearts of all! oh, world enchantress! may we ever be devoted to thee! Your vehicles, the huka, the pipe, let them ever remain before us. At the mere sight of them we shall obtain heavenly delight. Oh, huka! thou that sendest forth volumes of curling smoke, that hast a winding tube shaming the serpent! oh, bowl that beautifies thy top! how graceful are the chains of thy turban;[68] how great is the beauty of thy curved mouthpiece; how sonorous the murmur of the ice-cool water in thy depths! Oh, world enchantress! oh, soother of the fatigues of man, employer of the idle, comforter of the henpecked husband's heart, encourager of timid dependents, who can know thy glory! Soother of the sorrowing! thou givest courage to the timid, intellect to the stupid, peace to the angry! Oh, bestower of blessings, giver of all happiness, appear in undiminished power in my room! Let your sweet scent increase daily, let your cool waters continue to rumble in your depths, let your mouthpiece ever be glued to my lips!
When Debendra returned from Govindpur, removed his disguise, and went back to his natural self, he settled himself in the next room. His servant had prepared the pain-relieving huka and placed it in front of him. Debendra took some time to serve the fatigue-relieving goddess, Tobacco. A person who doesn’t know the pleasure of tobacco isn’t truly a man. Oh, you who satisfy all hearts! oh, enchanting world! may we always be devoted to you! Your vessels, the huka, the pipe, may they always be in front of us. Just seeing them brings us heavenly joy. Oh, huka! you who send out clouds of curling smoke, with a twisting tube that puts the serpent to shame! oh, bowl that adds beauty to your top! how elegant are the chains of your turban; how wonderful is the shape of your mouthpiece; how soothing is the sound of the ice-cool water within you! Oh, enchanting world! oh, comforter for the weary, entertainer of the idle, solace for the henpecked husband, supporter of the timid—who can truly grasp your greatness? Comforter of the sorrowful! you give courage to the shy, intelligence to the clueless, and peace to the angry! Oh, giver of blessings, provider of all happiness, come to me in your full glory! May your sweet aroma grow stronger each day, may your cool water continue to bubble in your depths, and may your mouthpiece always be at my lips!
Pleasure-loving Debendra enjoyed the favour of this great goddess as long as he would, but yet he was not satisfied; he proceeded to worship another great power. In the hand of his servant was displayed a number of straw-covered bottles. Then on that white, soft, spacious bed, a gold-coloured mat being laid, a spirit-stand was placed thereon, and the sunset-coloured liquid goddess poured into the power-giving decanter. A cut-glass tumbler[69] and plated jug served as utensils for worship. From the kitchen a black, ugly priest came, bearing hot dishes of roast mutton and cutlets to take the place of the sacred flowers. Then Debendra, as a devoted worshipper, sat down to perform the rites.
Pleasure-loving Debendra enjoyed the favor of this great goddess for as long as he could, but he still felt unfulfilled; he decided to worship another powerful entity. In the hand of his servant, a number of straw-covered bottles were displayed. Then, on that soft, spacious white bed, a gold-colored mat was laid down, and a spirit stand was placed on it, while the sunset-colored liquid goddess was poured into the power-giving decanter. A cut-glass tumbler[69] and a plated jug were used as the utensils for worship. From the kitchen, a black, unattractive priest arrived, carrying hot dishes of roast mutton and cutlets to replace the sacred flowers. Then, as a devoted worshipper, Debendra sat down to perform the rituals.
Then came a troop of singers and musicians, and concluded the ceremonies with their music and songs.
Then a group of singers and musicians arrived and wrapped up the ceremonies with their music and songs.
At length a young man of about Debendra's age, of a placid countenance, came and sat with him. This was his cousin, Surendra. Surendra was in every respect the opposite of Debendra, yet the latter was much attached to his cousin; he heeded no one in the world but him. Every night Surendra came to see him, but, fearing the wine, he would only sit a few minutes.
At last, a young man around Debendra's age, with a calm expression, came and sat with him. This was his cousin, Surendra. Surendra was the complete opposite of Debendra in every way, yet Debendra was very fond of him; he paid attention to no one else in the world. Every night, Surendra came to visit, but, afraid of the wine, he would only stay for a few minutes.
When all were gone, Surendra asked Debendra, "How are you to-day?"
When everyone had left, Surendra asked Debendra, "How are you today?"
"The body," replied Debendra, "is the temple of disease."
"The body," Debendra replied, "is a temple for illness."
"Yours is, especially," said his cousin, "Have you fever to-day?"[70]
"Yours is, especially," said his cousin, "Do you have a fever today?"[70]
"No."
"Nope."
"Is your liver out of order?"
"Is your liver not functioning properly?"
"It is as before."
"It’s the same as before."
"Would it not be better to refrain from these excesses?"
"Wouldn't it be better to avoid these extremes?"
"What, drinking? How often will you speak of that? Wine is my constant companion," said Debendra.
"What, drinking? How often are you gonna talk about that? Wine is my constant companion," said Debendra.
"But why should it be?" replied Surendra. "Wine was not born with you; you can't take it away with you. Many give it up, why should not you do so?"
"But why should it be?" replied Surendra. "Wine didn't come into existence with you; you can't take it with you. Many people give it up, so why shouldn't you?"
"What have I to gain by giving it up? Those who do so have some happiness in prospect, and therefore give it up. For me there is no happiness."
"What do I have to gain by letting it go? Those who do have some happiness ahead of them, and that's why they let it go. But for me, there’s no happiness."
"Then to save your life give it up."
"Then, to save your life, let it go."
"Those to whom life brings happiness may give up wine; but what have I to gain by living?"
"Those who find happiness in life might give up wine; but what do I have to gain by living?"
Surendra's eyes filled with tears. Full of love for his friend, he urged:
Surendra's eyes welled up with tears. Overflowing with love for his friend, he urged:
"Then for my sake give it up."
"Then please give it up for me."
Tears came into the eyes of Debendra as he[71] said: "No one but yourself urges me to walk in virtuous paths. If I ever do give it up it will be for your sake, and—"
Tears filled Debendra's eyes as he[71] said: "No one but you pushes me to follow the right path. If I ever let go of it, it will be for your sake, and—"
"And what?"
"So what?"
"If ever I hear that my wife is dead I will give up drink. Otherwise, whether I live or die, I care not."
"If I ever hear that my wife has died, I will quit drinking. Otherwise, whether I live or die doesn't matter to me."
Surendra, with moist eyes, mentally anathematising Hembati, took his leave.
Surendra, with teary eyes, silently cursing Hembati, said his goodbyes.


CHAPTER IX.
SURJA MUKHI'S LETTER.

earest Srimati Kamal Mani Dasi, long may you live!
Dear Srimati Kamal Mani Dasi, may you live a long life!
"I am ashamed to address you any longer with a blessing. You have become a woman, and the mistress of a house. Still I cannot think of you otherwise than as my younger sister. I have brought you up to womanhood, I taught you your letters; but now when I see your writing I am ashamed to send this scrawl. But of what use to be ashamed? My day is over; were it not so how should I be in this condition? What [74]condition?—it is a thing I cannot speak of to any one; should I do so there will be sorrow and shame; yet if I do not tell some one of my heart's trouble I cannot endure it. To whom can I speak? You are my beloved sister; except you no one loves me. Also it concerns your brother. I can speak of it to no one but you.
"I’m ashamed to keep addressing you with a blessing. You’ve grown into a woman and the head of a household. Still, I can’t think of you as anything other than my younger sister. I raised you into womanhood; I taught you the alphabet. But now, looking at your writing, I’m embarrassed to send this mess. But what’s the point of being ashamed? My time is over; if it weren’t, how would I be in this situation? What [74] situation?—that’s something I can’t talk about with anyone; if I did, it would bring sorrow and shame. Yet if I don’t share my heart's troubles with someone, I can’t bear it. Who can I talk to? You’re my dear sister; besides you, no one loves me. This also concerns your brother. I can only discuss it with you."
"I have prepared my own funeral pyre. If I had not cared for Kunda Nandini, and she had died, would that have been any loss to me? God cares for so many others—would He not have cared for her? Why did I bring her home to my own destruction! When you saw that unfortunate being she was a child, now she is seventeen or eighteen. I admit she is beautiful; her beauty is fatal to me. If I have any happiness on earth it is in my husband; if I care about anything in this world it is for my husband; if there is any wealth belonging to me it is my husband: this husband Kunda Nandini is snatching from me. If I have a desire on earth it is for my husband's love: of that love Kunda Nandini is cheating me. Do not think evil of your brother; I am not reproaching him. He is virtuous, not even his[75] enemies can find a fault in him. I can see daily that he tries to subdue his heart. Wherever Kunda Nandini may happen to be, from that spot, if possible, he averts his eyes; unless there is absolute necessity he does not speak her name. He is even harsh towards her; I have heard him scold her when she has committed no fault. Then why am I writing all this trash? Should a man ask this question it would be difficult to make him understand, but you being a woman will comprehend. If Kunda Nandini is in his eyes but as other women, why is he so careful not to look towards her? why take such pains to avoid speaking her name? He is conscious of guilt towards Kunda Nandini, therefore he scolds her without cause; that anger is not with her, but with himself; that scolding is not for her, but for himself. This I can understand. I who have been so long devoted to him, who within and without see only him, if I but see his shadow I can tell his thoughts. What can he hide from me? Occasionally when his mind is absent his eyes wander hither and thither; do I not know what they are seeking?[76] If he meets it, again becoming troubled he withdraws his eyes; can I not understand that? For whose voice is he listening at meal-times when he pauses in the act of carrying food to his mouth? and when Kunda's tones reach his ear, and he fastens to eat his meal, can one not understand that? My beloved always had a gracious countenance; why is he now always so absent-minded? If one speaks to him he does not hear, but gives an absent answer. If, becoming angry, I say, 'May I die?' paying no attention he answers, 'Yes.' If I ask where his thoughts are, he says with his lawsuits; but I know they have no place in his mind; when he speaks of his lawsuits he is always merry. Another point. One day the old women of the neighbourhood were speaking of Kunda Nandini, pitying her young widowhood, her unprotected condition. Your brother came up; from within I saw his eyes fill with tears; he turned away and left them quickly. The other day I engaged a new servant; her name is Kumuda. Sometimes the Babu calls Kumuda; when so doing he often slips out the name Kunda instead of[77] Kumuda, then how confused he is—why should he be confused? I cannot say he is neglectful of me, or unaffectionate; rather he is more attentive than before, more affectionate. The reason of this I fully understand: he is conscious of fault towards me; but I know that I have no longer a place in his heart. Attention is one thing, love quite another; the difference between these two we women can easily understand.
"I’ve set up my own funeral pyre. If I hadn’t cared for Kunda Nandini and she’d died, would that have meant anything to me? God looks after so many others—wouldn’t He care for her too? Why did I bring her home to ruin my own life? When you first saw that unfortunate girl, she was just a child; now she’s seventeen or eighteen. I’ll admit she’s beautiful; her beauty is deadly for me. If I have any happiness in this world, it’s in my husband; if I care about anything here, it’s him; and if there’s any wealth that belongs to me, it’s my husband: this husband that Kunda Nandini is taking from me. If I have a desire on this earth, it’s for my husband’s love, but Kunda Nandini is robbing me of that love. Don’t think poorly of your brother; I’m not blaming him. He’s virtuous; even his enemies can’t find fault with him. I can see every day that he tries to resist his feelings. Wherever Kunda Nandini is, he does his best to look away from her; unless there’s an absolute need, he doesn’t say her name. He’s even harsh with her; I’ve heard him scold her when she hasn’t done anything wrong. So why am I writing all this? If a man were to ask that, it would be hard to explain, but you, being a woman, will understand. If Kunda Nandini is just another woman to him, why is he so careful not to look at her? Why does he go out of his way to avoid saying her name? He feels guilty about Kunda Nandini, that’s why he scolds her for no reason; his anger isn’t towards her, but towards himself; that scolding is for himself, not for her. I can see that. I, who’ve devoted myself to him for so long, only see him inside and out; if I just catch a glimpse of his shadow, I can tell what he’s thinking. What can he hide from me? Sometimes, when his mind wanders, his eyes drift around; don’t I know what they’re looking for? If he spots it, he quickly looks away, troubled; can’t I understand that? Whose voice does he listen for at mealtime when he pauses bringing food to his mouth? When Kunda’s voice reaches him, and he forgets to eat, who can’t understand that? My beloved has always had a kind face; why is he always so lost in thought now? If someone talks to him, he doesn’t hear and gives a distracted answer. If I angrily say, ‘May I die?’ he indifferent replies, ‘Yes.’ If I ask where his thoughts are, he says it’s his lawsuits; but I know they’re not on his mind; when he talks about his lawsuits, he’s always cheerful. Another thing: one day, the older women in the neighborhood were talking about Kunda Nandini, pitying her for being a young widow, unprotected. Your brother showed up; I saw his eyes fill with tears from inside, and he quickly turned away and left. Recently, I hired a new servant named Kumuda. Sometimes the Babu calls for Kumuda; when he does, he often slips and says Kunda instead of Kumuda, and then becomes embarrassed—why should he be embarrassed? I can’t say he neglects or is unloving toward me; in fact, he’s more attentive and affectionate than before. I understand the reason: he feels guilty towards me; but I know I no longer hold a place in his heart. Attention and love are two different things; the difference between them is something we women can easily recognize."
"There is another amusing matter. A learned pandit in Calcutta, named Iswara Chandra Bidya Sagar, has published a book on the marriage of widows. If he who would establish the custom of marrying widows is a pandit, then who can be called a dunce? Just now, the Brahman Bhattacharjya bringing the book into the boita khana, there was a great discussion.
"There’s another funny thing. A knowledgeable scholar in Calcutta, named Iswara Chandra Bidya Sagar, has published a book about widow remarriage. If someone trying to promote the practice of marrying widows is considered a scholar, then who would be called a fool? Just now, the Brahman Bhattacharjya brought the book into the sitting room, and there was a big discussion."
"After much talk in favour of widow-marriage, the Brahman, taking ten rupees from the Babu for the repairs of the Tote,[6] went his way. On the following day Sharbabhoum Thakur replied on the same subject. I had some golden bracelets made for his daughter's wedding. No one else was in favour of widow-marriage.
"After a lot of discussion in support of widow marriage, the Brahman took ten rupees from the Babu for the repairs of the Tote,[6] and went on his way. The next day, Sharbabhoum Thakur responded on the same topic. I had some gold bracelets made for his daughter's wedding. No one else supported widow marriage."
"I have taken up much time in wearying you with my sorrows. Do I not know how vexed you will be? but what can I do, sister? If I do not tell you my sorrows, to whom shall I tell them? I have not said all yet, but hoping for some relief from you has calmed me a little. Say nothing of this to anyone; above all, I conjure you, show not this letter to your husband. Will you not come and see me? if you will come now your presence will heal many of my troubles. Send me quickly news of your husband and of your child.
"I've taken up a lot of your time by sharing my troubles. I know how frustrated you might feel, but what can I do, sister? If I don’t share my sorrows with you, who else can I turn to? I haven't revealed everything yet, but just hoping for some relief from you has eased my mind a bit. Please keep this to yourself; I especially urge you not to show this letter to your husband. Will you come and see me? Your presence right now would help heal many of my issues. Please send me updates about your husband and your child quickly."
"Surja Mukhi.
"Sunflower."
"P.S.—Another word. If I can get rid of this girl I may be happy once more; but how to get rid of her? Can you take her? Would you not fear to do so?"
"P.S.—One more thing. If I can get this girl out of my life, I might be happy again; but how do I get rid of her? Can you take her off my hands? Wouldn't you be afraid to do that?"
Kamal Mani replied—
Kamal Mani responded—
"You have become quite foolish, else how can you doubt your husband's heart? Do not lose faith in him; if you really cannot trust him you[79] had better drown yourself. I, Kamal Mani, tell you you had better drown yourself. She who can no longer trust her husband had better die."
"You've become really foolish; how can you doubt your husband's love? Don't lose faith in him; if you truly can't trust him, you[79] might as well drown yourself. I, Kamal Mani, advise you that you might as well drown yourself. A woman who can't trust her husband might as well die."


CHAPTER X.
THE SPROUT.

n the course of a short time Nagendra's whole nature was changed. As at eventime, in the hot season, the clear sky becomes suddenly veiled in cloud, so Nagendra's mind became clouded. Surja Mukhi wept secretly.
In a short time, Nagendra's entire personality shifted. Just like how the clear sky can suddenly be covered by clouds in the evening during the hot season, Nagendra's mind became clouded. Surja Mukhi cried quietly.
She thought to herself, "I will take Kamal Mani's advice. Why should I doubt my husband's heart? His heart is firm as the hills. I am under a delusion. Perhaps he is suffering in health." Alas! Surja Mukhi was [82]building a bridge of sand.
She thought to herself, "I'm going to follow Kamal Mani's advice. Why should I doubt my husband's feelings? His heart is as solid as the mountains. I'm just imagining things. Maybe he's dealing with health issues." Unfortunately, Surja Mukhi was [82]building a bridge of sand.
In the house there dwelt a sort of doctor. Surja Mukhi was the house-mistress. Sitting behind the purdah (a half-transparent screen) she held converse with everyone, the person addressed remaining in the verandah. Calling the doctor, Surja Mukhi said—
In the house lived a kind of doctor. Surja Mukhi was the lady of the house. Sitting behind the purdah (a semi-transparent screen), she talked with everyone, while the person she was speaking to stayed on the verandah. Calling for the doctor, Surja Mukhi said—
"The Babu is not well; why do you not give him medicine?"
"The Babu isn't doing well; why don't you give him some medicine?"
"Is he ill? I did not know of it; I have heard nothing."
"Is he sick? I didn't know about it; I haven't heard anything."
"Has not the Babu told you?"
"Hasn't the Babu said anything?"
"No; what is the matter?"
"No; what's the matter?"
"What is the matter? Are you a doctor, and do you ask that? Do I know?"
"What’s going on? Are you a doctor, and are you asking me that? How would I know?"
The doctor was nonplussed, and saying, "I will go and inquire," he was about to leave; but Surja Mukhi, calling him back, said, "Do not ask the Babu about it; give him some medicine."
The doctor was taken aback, and saying, "I'll go and ask," he was about to leave; but Surja Mukhi, calling him back, said, "Don't ask the Babu about it; just give him some medicine."
The doctor thought this a peculiar sort of treatment; but there was no lack of medicine in the house, and going to the dispensary, he composed a draught of soda, port-wine, and some simple[83] drugs, and, filling a bottle, labelled it, "To be taken twice a day."
The doctor found this type of treatment unusual; however, there was no shortage of medicine in the house. He went to the dispensary, mixed together a drink of soda, port wine, and some basic[83] drugs, and after filling a bottle, he labeled it, "Take twice a day."
Surja Mukhi took the physic to her husband, and requested him to drink it. Nagendra, taking the bottle, read the inscription, and, hurling it away, struck a cat with it. The cat fled, her tail drenched with the physic.
Surja Mukhi brought the medicine to her husband and asked him to take it. Nagendra, grabbing the bottle, read the label and threw it away, hitting a cat with it. The cat ran off, its tail soaked with the medicine.
Surja Mukhi said: "If you will not take the medicine, at least tell me what is your complaint."
Surja Mukhi said, "If you're not going to take the medicine, at least let me know what your problem is."
Nagendra, annoyed, said, "What complaint have I?"
Nagendra, frustrated, said, "What complaint do I have?"
"Look at yourself," replied Surja Mukhi, "and see how thin you have become," and she held a mirror before him.
"Look at yourself," Surja Mukhi said, "and see how thin you've gotten," and she held a mirror up to him.
Nagendra, taking the mirror from her, threw it down and smashed it to atoms.
Nagendra took the mirror from her, tossed it down, and shattered it into tiny pieces.
Surja Mukhi began to weep. With an angry look Nagendra went away. Meeting a servant in the outer room, the Babu struck him for no fault. Surja Mukhi felt as if she had received the blow. Formerly Nagendra had been of a very calm temper; now the least thing made him angry.[84]
Surja Mukhi started to cry. Nagendra left with an angry expression. When he encountered a servant in the outer room, the Babu hit him for no reason. Surja Mukhi felt as if she had been struck. Nagendra used to be very calm; now, he got angry over the smallest things.[84]
Nor was this all. One night, the hour for the meal being already past, Nagendra had not come in. Surja Mukhi sat expecting him. At length, when he appeared, she was astonished at his looks. His face and eyes were inflamed—he had been drinking, and as he had never been given to drinking before his wife was shocked. From that time it became a daily custom.
Nor was this all. One night, the dinner time had already passed, and Nagendra still hadn’t come home. Surja Mukhi waited for him. Finally, when he showed up, she was shocked by his appearance. His face and eyes were red—he had been drinking, and since he had never drunk before, his wife was taken aback. From that point on, it became a daily habit.
One day Surja Mukhi, casting herself at his feet, choking down the sobs in her throat, with much humility entreated, "For my sake give this up."
One day, Surja Mukhi threw herself at his feet, holding back the sobs in her throat, and with great humility begged, "Please give this up for me."
Nagendra asked angrily, "What is my fault?"
Nagendra asked angrily, "What did I do wrong?"
Surja Mukhi said: "If you do not know what is the fault, how can I? I only beg that for my sake you will give it up."
Surja Mukhi said: "If you don't know what the problem is, how can I? I just ask that, for my sake, you let it go."
Nagendra replied: "Surja Mukhi, I am a drunkard! If devotion should be paid to a drunkard, pay it to me; otherwise it is not called for."
Nagendra replied: "Surja Mukhi, I'm a drunk! If you're going to honor a drunk, honor me; otherwise, there's no need for it."
Surja Mukhi left the room to conceal her tears, since her weeping irritated her husband, and led him to strike the servants.[85]
Surja Mukhi left the room to hide her tears, because her crying annoyed her husband and made him lash out at the servants.[85]
Soon after, the Dewan sent word to the mistress that the estate was going to ruin.
Soon after, the Dewan informed the mistress that the estate was falling apart.
She asked, "Why?"
She asked, "Why?"
"Because the Babu will not see to things. The people on the estates do just as they please. Since the Karta is so careless, no one heeds what I say."
"Because the Babu won’t take care of things. The people on the estates do whatever they want. Since the Karta is so negligent, no one listens to what I say."
Surja Mukhi answered: "If the owner looks after the estate, it will be preserved; if not, let it go to ruin. I shall be thankful if I can only save my own property" (meaning her husband).
Surja Mukhi replied, "If the owner takes care of the estate, it will be maintained; if not, it will fall apart. I'll be grateful if I can just save my own belongings" (referring to her husband).
Formerly Nagendra had carefully looked after all his affairs.
Formerly, Nagendra had taken great care of all his business.
One day some hundreds of his ryots came to the kacheri, and with joined palms stood at the door. "Give us justice," they said, "O your highness; we cannot survive the tyranny of the naib (a law officer) and the gomashta. We are being robbed of everything. If you do not save us, to whom shall we go?"
One day, several hundred of his farmers came to the office and, with their hands together in prayer, stood at the entrance. "Give us justice, your highness," they said. "We can't endure the oppression from the law officer and the accountant. We're being stripped of everything. If you don’t help us, who else can we turn to?"
Nagendra gave orders to drive them away.
Nagendra ordered them to be driven away.
Formerly, when one of his gomashtas had beaten a ryot and taken a [86]rupee from him, Nagendra had cut ten rupees from the gomashta's pay and given it to the ryot.
Previously, when one of his gomashtas had beaten a ryot and taken a [86]rupee from him, Nagendra had deducted ten rupees from the gomashta's pay and given it to the ryot.
Hara Deb Ghosal wrote to Nagendra: "What has happened to you? I cannot imagine what you are doing. I receive no letters from you, or, if I do, they contain but two or three lines without any meaning. Have you taken offence with me? If so, why do you not tell me? Have you lost your lawsuit? Then why not say so? If you do not tell me anything else, at least give me news of your health."
Hara Deb Ghosal wrote to Nagendra: "What’s going on with you? I can’t picture what you’re doing. I haven’t received any letters from you, or if I do, they only have two or three lines that don’t say much. Are you upset with me? If you are, why not just tell me? Did you lose your lawsuit? Then why not just say it? If you can’t share anything else, at least let me know how you’re doing health-wise."
Nagendra replied: "Do not be angry with me. I am going to destruction."
Nagendra replied, "Please don't be mad at me. I'm headed for ruin."
Hara Deb was very wise. On reading this letter he thought to himself: "What is this? Anxiety about money? A quarrel with some friend? Debendra Datta? Nothing of the kind. Is this love?"
Hara Deb was very wise. Upon reading this letter, he thought to himself: "What is this? Worry about money? A fight with a friend? Debendra Datta? Nothing like that. Is this love?"
Kamal Mani received another letter from Surja Mukhi. It concluded thus: "Come, Kamal Mani, sister; except you I have no friend. Come to me."
Kamal Mani got another letter from Surja Mukhi. It ended with: "Come, Kamal Mani, sister; you're my only friend. Please come to me."
Kamal Mani was agitated; she could contain[87] herself no longer. She felt that she must consult her husband.
Kamal Mani was restless; she couldn’t hold back[87] any longer. She knew she had to talk to her husband.
Srish Chandra, sitting in the inner apartments, was looking over the office account-books. Beside him on the bed, Satish Chandra, a child of a year old, was rejoicing in the possession of an English newspaper. He had first tried to eat it; but, failing in that, had spread it out and was now sitting upon it. Kamal Mani, approaching her husband, brought the end of her sari round her neck, threw herself down, bending her forehead to the floor, and, folding her hands, said, "I pay my devotions to you, O great king." Just before this time, a play had been performed in the house, from whence she borrowed this inflated speech.
Srish Chandra, sitting in the inner rooms, was reviewing the office accounting books. Next to him on the bed, Satish Chandra, a one-year-old child, was having fun with an English newspaper. He had initially tried to eat it; but after failing, he spread it out and was now sitting on it. Kamal Mani, walking over to her husband, brought the end of her sari around her neck, threw herself down, pressing her forehead to the floor, and with her hands folded, said, "I pay my respects to you, O great king." Just before this, a play had been performed in the house, from which she borrowed this exaggerated phrase.
Srish said, laughing, "Have the cucumbers been stolen again?"
Srish said, laughing, "Have the cucumbers been taken again?"
"Neither cucumbers nor melons; this time a most valuable thing has been stolen."
"Neither cucumbers nor melons; this time something really valuable has been stolen."
"Where is the robbery?" asked Srish.
"Where's the heist?" asked Srish.
"The robbery took place at Govindpur. My elder brother had a broken [88]shell in a golden box. Some one has stolen it."
"The robbery happened in Govindpur. My older brother had a broken [88] shell in a gold box. Someone has stolen it."
Srish, not understanding the metaphor, said "Your brother's golden casket is Surja Mukhi. What is the broken shell?"
Srish, not getting the metaphor, said, "Your brother's golden casket is Surja Mukhi. What's the broken shell?"
"Surja Mukhi's wits," replied Kamal.
"Surja Mukhi's smarts," replied Kamal.
"People say if one has a mind to play he can do so, though the shells are broken" (referring to a game played with shells). "If Surja Mukhi's understanding is defective, yet with it she gained your brother's heart, and with all your wisdom, you could not bring him over to your side. Who has stolen the broken shell?"
"People say that if someone wants to play, they can, even if the shells are cracked." (referring to a game played with shells). "If Surja Mukhi's understanding is lacking, she still won your brother's heart, while despite all your wisdom, you couldn't get him to side with you. Who has taken the broken shell?"
"That I know not; but, from reading her letter, I perceive it is gone—else how could a woman write such a letter?"
"That I don't know; but from reading her letter, I can tell it's over—otherwise, how could a woman write such a letter?"
"May I see the letter?" asked Srish.
"Can I see the letter?" asked Srish.
Kamal Mani placed the letter in her husband's hand, saying: "Surja Mukhi forbade my telling you all this; but while I keep it from you I am quite uneasy. I can neither sleep nor eat, and I fear I may lose my senses."
Kamal Mani handed the letter to her husband and said, "Surja Mukhi told me not to tell you any of this, but it's really bothering me to keep it from you. I can’t sleep or eat, and I'm worried I might lose my mind."
"If you have been forbidden to tell me of the matter I cannot read this letter, nor do I wish to hear its contents. Tell me what has to [89]be done."
"If you've been told not to discuss this with me, then I can't read this letter, and I don't want to know what's in it. Just let me know what needs to be done."
"This is what must be done," replied Kamal. "Surja Mukhi's wits are scattered, and must be restored. There is no one that can do this except Satish Babu. His aunt has written requesting that he may be sent to Govindpur."
"This is what we need to do," replied Kamal. "Surja Mukhi's thoughts are all over the place and need to be put back together. There's no one who can do this except Satish Babu. His aunt has written asking for him to be sent to Govindpur."
Satish Babu had in the meantime upset a vase of flowers, and was now aiming at the inkstand. Watching him, Srish Chandra said: "Yes; he he is well fitted to act as physician. I understand now. He is invited to his aunt's house; if he goes, his mother must go also. Surja Mukhi's wits must be lost, or she could not have sent such an invitation."
Satish Babu had, in the meantime, knocked over a vase of flowers and was now aiming for the inkstand. Watching him, Srish Chandra said: "Yeah; he's definitely suited to be a doctor. I get it now. He's invited to his aunt's house; if he goes, his mom has to go too. Surja Mukhi must have lost her mind to send such an invitation."
"Not Satish Babu only; we are all invited."
"Not just Satish Babu; we're all invited."
"Why am I invited?" asked Srish.
"Why am I invited?" asked Srish.
"Can I go alone?" replied Kamal. "Who will look after the luggage?"
"Can I go by myself?" Kamal replied. "Who's going to take care of the luggage?"
"It is very unreasonable in Surja Mukhi if she wants her husband's brother-in-law only that he may look after the luggage. I can find some one else to perform that office for a couple of days."
"It’s really unfair for Surja Mukhi to expect her husband’s brother-in-law to just take care of the luggage. I can easily find someone else to do that for a few days."
Kamal Mani was angry; she frowned, mocked at Srish Chandra, and, snatching the paper on[90] which he was writing out of his hand, tore it to pieces.
Kamal Mani was furious; she frowned, made fun of Srish Chandra, and, grabbing the paper on[90] which he was writing, ripped it into pieces.
Srish Chandra, smiling, said, "It serves you right."
Srish Chandra, smiling, said, "That's what you get."
Kamal, affecting anger, said, "I will speak in that way if I wish!"
Kamal, pretending to be angry, said, "I’ll talk like that if I want to!"
Srish, in the same tone, replied, "And I shall speak as I choose!"
Srish replied in the same tone, "And I will speak however I want!"
Then a playful scuffle ensued; Kamal pretended to strike her husband, who in return pulled down her hair; whereupon she threw away his ink. Then they exchanged angry kisses. Satish Babu was delighted at this performance; he knew that kisses were his special property, so when he saw them scattered in this lavish manner he stood up, supporting himself by his mother's dress, to claim his royal share, crowing joyously. How sweetly that laugh fell on the ears of Kamal Mani! She took him in her lap, and showered kisses upon him. Srish Chandra followed her example. Then Satish Babu, having received his dues, got down and made for his father's brightly coloured pencil, which soon found its way into his mouth.[91]
Then a playful tussle broke out; Kamal pretended to hit her husband, who then pulled her hair. In response, she tossed aside his ink. They exchanged heated kisses. Satish Babu was thrilled by their antics; he knew kisses were his special thing, so when he saw them being shared so freely, he stood up, holding onto his mother's dress, to claim his rightful share, laughing joyfully. What a sweet sound that laughter was to Kamal Mani! She picked him up and showered him with kisses. Srish Chandra followed her lead. After getting his share, Satish Babu climbed down and headed for his father's brightly colored pencil, which soon ended up in his mouth.[91]
In the battle between the Kurus and Pandus there was a great struggle between Bhagadatta and Arjuna. In this fight, Bhagadatta being invincible, and Arjuna vulnerable, the latter called Krishna to his aid, who, receiving the charge of Bhagadatta on his breast, blunted the force of the weapons.[7] In like manner, Satish Chandra having received these attacks on his face, peace was restored. But their peace and war was like the dropping of clouds, fitful.
In the clash between the Kurus and Pandus, there was a fierce struggle between Bhagadatta and Arjuna. In this battle, Bhagadatta was unbeatable, while Arjuna was at risk, so he called Krishna for help. Krishna took the hit from Bhagadatta, absorbing the impact of the weapons.[7] Similarly, when Satish Chandra faced these attacks on his face, calm was restored. But their peace and conflict were like shifting clouds, unpredictable.
[7] An illustration drawn from the Mahabharat.
__A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__ An illustration from the *Mahabharata*.
Then Srish asked, "Must you really go to Govindpur? What am I to do alone?"
Then Srish asked, "Do you really have to go to Govindpur? What am I supposed to do by myself?"
"Do you think I can go alone?" answered his wife. "We must both go. Arrange matters in the morning when you go to business, and come home quickly. If you are long, Satish and I will sit crying for you."
"Do you think I can go by myself?" his wife replied. "We should both go. Sort things out in the morning when you head to work, and come back quickly. If you take too long, Satish and I will be in tears waiting for you."
"I cannot go," replied Srish. "This is the season for buying linseed. You must go without me."
"I can't go," Srish replied. "This is the time for buying linseed. You’ll have to go without me."
"Come, Satish," was Kamal's reply; "we two will go and weep."
"Come on, Satish," Kamal said, "let's go and cry together."
At the sound of his mother's voice Satish ceased to gnaw the pencil, and raised another shout of joyous laughter. So Kamal's cry did not come off this time; in place of it the kissing performance was gone through as before.
At the sound of his mother's voice, Satish stopped chewing on the pencil and burst into another fit of joyful laughter. So Kamal's shout didn’t succeed this time; instead, the kissing routine happened just like before.
At its close Kamal said, "Now what are your orders?"
At the end, Kamal said, "So, what do you want me to do now?"
Srish repeated that she must go without him, as he could not leave; whereupon she sat down sulking. Srish went behind her and began to mark her forehead with the ink from his pen.
Srish insisted that she had to go without him since he couldn't leave; then she plopped down sulking. Srish walked up behind her and started to draw on her forehead with the ink from his pen.
Then with a laugh she embraced him, saying, "Oh, dearer than life, how I love you!"
Then with a laugh, she hugged him, saying, "Oh, more precious than life, how I love you!"
He was obliged to return the embrace, when the ink transferred itself from her face to his.
He had to return the hug when the ink from her face smudged onto his.
The quarrel thus ended, Kamal said, "If you really will not go, then make arrangements for me."
The argument finished, Kamal said, "If you're really not going, then set things up for me."
"When will you come back?"
"When will you be back?"
"Need you ask?" said Kamal; "if you don't go, can I stay there long?"
"Do you really need to ask?" Kamal said. "If you don't go, how can I stay there for long?"
Srish Chandra sent Kamal Mani to Govindpur, but it is certain that Srish Chandra's employers[93] did not do much in linseed at that time. The other clerks have privately informed us that this was the fault of Srish Chandra, who did not give his mind to it, but sat at home in meditation.
Srish Chandra sent Kamal Mani to Govindpur, but it's clear that Srish Chandra's employers[93] weren't very active in linseed at that time. The other clerks have privately told us that this was Srish Chandra's fault, as he didn’t pay attention to it and just stayed home in meditation.
Srish hearing himself thus accused, remarked, "It may be so, my wife was absent at that time."
Srish, hearing himself being accused, replied, "That might be true; my wife wasn’t there at that time."
The hearers shook their heads, saying, "He is under petticoat government!" which so delighted Srish Chandra that he called to his servant, "Prepare dinner; these gentlemen will dine with me to-day."
The listeners shook their heads, saying, "He's being controlled by a woman!" This amused Srish Chandra so much that he called to his servant, "Get dinner ready; these gentlemen will be dining with me today."


CHAPTER XI.
CAUGHT AT LAST.

t was as though a flower had bloomed in the family house at Govindpur. The sight of Kamal Mani's smiling face dried the tears in the eyes of Surja Mukhi. The moment she set foot in the house Kamal took in hand the dressing of her sister-in-law's hair, for Surja Mukhi had neglected herself lately.
It was like a flower had blossomed in the family home at Govindpur. The sight of Kamal Mani's smiling face wiped away the tears in Surja Mukhi's eyes. As soon as she walked into the house, Kamal took charge of doing her sister-in-law's hair, since Surja Mukhi had been neglecting herself lately.
Kamal said, "Shall I put in a flower or two?"
Kamal said, "Should I add a flower or two?"
Surja Mukhi pinched her cheek, and forbade it.
Surja Mukhi pinched her cheek and told her not to do that.
So Kamal Mani did it slily. When people came in she said, "Do you see the old woman wearing flowers in her hair?"[96]
So Kamal Mani did it sneakily. When people came in, she said, "Do you see the old woman with flowers in her hair?"[96]
But even Kamal's bright face did not dispel the dark clouds from that of Nagendra. When he met her he only said, "Where do you come from, Kamal?"
But even Kamal's bright face didn't clear the dark clouds from Nagendra's. When he saw her, he just asked, "Where are you coming from, Kamal?"
She bent before him, saying bashfully, "Baby has brought me."
She leaned down in front of him and said shyly, "Baby brought me."
"Indeed! I'll beat the rascal," replied Nagendra, taking the child in his arms, and spending an hour in play with him, in return for which the grateful child made free with his moustache.
"Absolutely! I'll take care of that kid," said Nagendra, picking up the child and playing with him for an hour, during which the thankful child tugged at his mustache.
Kamal Mani playfully accosted Kunda with the words, "Ha, Kundi, Kundi! Nundi, Dundi! are you quite well, Kundi?"
Kamal Mani teasingly approached Kunda and said, "Hey, Kundi, Kundi! Nundi, Dundi! Are you doing okay, Kundi?"
The girl was silent in astonishment, but presently she said, "I am well."
The girl was speechless in shock, but after a moment, she said, "I'm good."
"Call me Didi (elder sister); if you do not I will burn your hair when you are asleep, or else I will give your body to the cockroaches."
"Call me Didi (big sister); if you don't, I'll set your hair on fire while you sleep, or I'll feed your body to the cockroaches."
Kunda obeyed. When she had been in Calcutta she had not addressed Kamal by any name; indeed she had rarely spoken; but seeing that Kamal was very loving-hearted, she had become fond of her. In the years that had intervened without a meet[97]ing she had a little forgotten Kamal; but now, both being amiable, their affection was born afresh, and became very close.
Kunda agreed. When she was in Calcutta, she hadn't called Kamal by any name; in fact, she had hardly spoken at all. But since Kamal was very warm-hearted, Kunda had grown fond of her. In the years that passed without seeing each other, she had almost forgotten Kamal; however, now that they were together again and both were friendly, their affection rekindled and became very strong.
When Kamal Mani talked of returning home, Surja Mukhi said, "Nay, sister, stay a little longer. I shall be wretched when you are gone. It relieves me to talk to you of my trouble."
When Kamal Mani talked about going back home, Surja Mukhi said, "No, sister, please stay a bit longer. I'll be miserable when you're gone. It helps me to share my troubles with you."
"I shall not go without arranging your affairs."
"I won't leave without taking care of your matters."
"What affairs?" said Surja Mukhi.
"What's going on?" said Surja Mukhi.
"Your Shradda" (funeral ceremonies), replied Kamal; but mentally she said, "Extracting the thorns from your path."
"Your Shradda" (funeral ceremonies), replied Kamal; but in her mind, she thought, "Removing the obstacles from your way."
When Kunda heard that Kamal talked of going, she went to her room and wept. Kamal going quietly after her found her with her head on the pillow, weeping. Kamal sat down to dress Kunda's hair, an occupation of which she was very fond. When she had finished she drew Kunda's head on to her lap, and wiped away the tears. Then she said, "Kunda, why do you weep?"
When Kunda heard that Kamal was thinking about leaving, she went to her room and cried. Kamal quietly followed her and found her with her head on the pillow, crying. Kamal sat down to do Kunda's hair, something she loved to do. When she finished, she pulled Kunda's head onto her lap and wiped away her tears. Then she said, "Kunda, why are you crying?"
"Why do you go away?" was the reply.
"Why are you leaving?" was the reply.
"Why should you weep for that?"
"Why should you cry over that?"
"Because you love me."
"Because you care about me."
"Does no one else love you?"
"Doesn't anyone else care about you?"
Kunda did not reply; and Kamal went on: "Does not the Bou (Surja Mukhi) love you? No? Don't hide it from me." (Still no answer.) "Does not my brother love you?" (Still silence.) "Since I love you and you love me, shall we not go together?" (Yet Kunda spoke not.) "Will you go?"
Kunda didn’t answer; and Kamal continued: "Doesn’t the Bou (Surja Mukhi) love you? No? Don’t keep it from me." (Still no response.) "Doesn’t my brother love you?" (Still silence.) "Since I love you and you love me, shouldn’t we go together?" (Yet Kunda remained silent.) "Will you come?"
Kunda shook her head, saying, "I will not go."
Kunda shook her head and said, "I'm not going."
Kamal's joyous face became grave; she thought, "This does not sound well. The girl has the same complaint as my brother, but he suffers the more deeply. My husband is not here, with whom can I take counsel?" Then Kamal Mani drew Kunda's head lovingly on her breast, and taking hold of her face caressingly, said, "Kunda, will you tell me the truth?"
Kamal's happy face turned serious; she thought, "This doesn't sound good. The girl has the same issue as my brother, but his pain is much worse. My husband isn't here; who can I turn to for advice?" Then Kamal Mani gently pulled Kunda's head onto her chest and, holding her face tenderly, said, "Kunda, will you tell me the truth?"
"About what?" said the girl.
"About what?" asked the girl.
"About what I shall ask thee. I am thy elder, I love thee as a sister; do not hide it from me, I will tell no one." In her mind she thought, "If I tell any one it will be my husband and my baby."[99]
"About what I want to ask you. I’m older than you, I care for you like a sister; please don’t keep it from me, I won’t say a word." In her mind, she thought, "If I share this with anyone, it will be my husband and my baby."[99]
After a pause Kunda asked, "What shall I tell you?"
After a moment, Kunda asked, "What should I tell you?"
"You love my brother dearly, don't you?"
"You really care about my brother, right?"
Kunda gave no answer.
Kunda didn’t respond.
Kamal Mani wept in her heart; aloud she said: "I understand. It is so. Well that does not hurt you, but many others suffer from it."
Kamal Mani cried inside; she said out loud: "I get it. That's true. It doesn’t hurt you, but a lot of others are suffering because of it."
Kunda Nandini, raising her head, fixed a steadfast look on the face of Kamal Mani.
Kunda Nandini, lifting her head, locked her steady gaze on Kamal Mani's face.
Kamal, understanding the silent question, replied, "Ah, unhappy one! dost thou not see that my brother loves thee?"
Kamal, grasping the unspoken question, replied, "Oh, unhappy one! Don't you see that my brother loves you?"
Kunda's head again sank on Kamal's breast, which she watered with her tears. Both wept silently for many minutes.
Kunda's head sank back onto Kamal's chest, which she soaked with her tears. Both cried silently for several minutes.
What the passion of love is the golden Kamal Mani knew very well. In her innermost heart she sympathized with Kunda, both in her joy and in her sorrow. Wiping Kunda's eyes she said again, "Kunda, will you go with me?"
What the passion of love is, the golden Kamal Mani knew very well. In her innermost heart, she felt for Kunda, both in her happiness and in her sadness. Wiping Kunda's tears, she said again, "Kunda, will you come with me?"
Kunda's eyes again tilled with tears.
Kunda's eyes filled with tears again.
More earnestly, Kamal said: "If you are out of sight my brother will forget you, and you will for[100]get him; otherwise, you will be lost, my brother will be lost and his wife—the house will go to ruin."
More seriously, Kamal said: "If you're not around, my brother will forget you, and you'll forget him; if that happens, you’ll both be lost, my brother will be lost, and his wife—the house will fall apart."
Kunda continued weeping.
Kunda kept crying.
Again Kamal asked, "Will you go? Only consider my brother's condition, his wife's."
Again Kamal asked, "Are you going to go? Just think about my brother's situation and his wife."
Kunda, after a long interval, wiped her eyes, sat up, and said, "I will go."
Kunda, after a long moment, wiped her eyes, sat up, and said, "I’m going."
Why this consent after so long an interval? Kamal understood that Kunda had offered up her own life on the temple of the household peace. Her own peace? Kamal felt that Kunda did not comprehend what was for her own peace.
Why this agreement after such a long time? Kamal realized that Kunda had sacrificed her own life for the peace of the household. Her own peace? Kamal thought that Kunda didn't really understand what would bring her true peace.


CHAPTER XII.
HIRA.

n this occasion, Haridasi Boisnavi entering, sang—
On this occasion, Haridasi Boisnavi entered and sang—
Yes, my friend, a dirty flower;
I wore it wrapped around my head, and I hung it in my ears—
"Friends, a dirty flower."
This day Surja Mukhi was present. She sent to call Kamal to hear the singing. Kamal came, bringing Kunda Nandini with her. The Boisnavi sang—
This day Surja Mukhi was present. She sent for Kamal to come and listen to the singing. Kamal arrived, bringing Kunda Nandini with her. The Boisnavi sang—
I will take its sweet treats,
I go to find where it blooms,
"This young fresh bud."
Kamal Mani frowned, and said: "Boisnavi Didi, may ashes be thrown on your face! Can you not sing something else?"
Kamal Mani frowned and said: "Boisnavi Didi, may ashes be thrown on your face! Can't you sing something else?"
Haridasi asked, "Why?"
Haridasi asked, "Why?"
Kamal, more angrily, said: "Why? Bring a bough of the babla tree, and show her how pleasant it is to be pierced by thorns."
Kamal, now more irritated, said: "Why? Grab a branch from the babla tree, and show her how nice it is to get pricked by thorns."
Surja Mukhi said gently: "We do not like songs of that sort; sing something suitable for the home circle."
Surja Mukhi said gently, "We don't like songs like that; sing something more fitting for a family setting."
The Boisnavi, saying "Very well," began to sing—
The Boisnavi, responding with "Alright," started to sing—
"By studying the holy Shastras, who would have the audacity to speak poorly of me?"
Kamal, frowning, said: "Listen to this singing if it pleases you, sister. I shall go away."
Kamal, frowning, said: "If you enjoy this singing, sister, then listen to it. I'm going to leave."
She went, and Surja Mukhi also left, with a displeased countenance. Of the rest of the women, those who relished the song remained, the others left; Kunda Nandini stayed. She did not understand the hidden meaning of the songs,[103] she scarcely even heard them. Her thoughts were absent, so she remained where she was seated. Haridasi sang no more, but talked on trivial subjects. Seeing that there would be no more singing, all left except Kunda Nandini, whose feet seemed as though they would not move. Thus, finding herself alone with Kunda, the Boisnavi talked much to her. Kunda heard something of her talk, but not all.
She left, and Surja Mukhi also departed, looking unhappy. Among the other women, those who enjoyed the song stayed, while the rest went away; Kunda Nandini remained. She didn't grasp the deeper meaning of the songs,[103] and she barely even heard them. Her mind was elsewhere, so she stayed seated. Haridasi stopped singing and started talking about trivial matters. Realizing there would be no more singing, everyone left except Kunda Nandini, whose feet seemed like they wouldn't move. So, finding herself alone with Kunda, the Boisnavi chatted a lot with her. Kunda caught some of what she said, but not everything.
Surja Mukhi saw all this from a distance, and when the two showed signs of being deep in conversation she called Kamal and pointed them out to her.
Surja Mukhi watched all of this from a distance, and when the two seemed to be deep in conversation, she called Kamal and pointed them out to her.
Kamal said: "What of that? they are only talking. She is a woman, not a man."
Kamal said: "So what? They're just talking. She's a woman, not a man."
"Who knows?" said Surja. "I think it is a man in disguise; but I will soon find out. How wicked Kunda must be!"
"Who knows?" Surja said. "I think it's a man in disguise, but I'll find out soon. Kunda must be so wicked!"
"Stay a moment," said Kamal, "I will fetch a babla branch, and let her feel its thorns."
"Wait a minute," said Kamal, "I'll get a babla branch and let her feel its thorns."
Thus saying, Kamal went in search of a bough. On the way she saw Satish, who had got possession of his aunt's vermilion, and was seated,[104] daubing neck, nose, chin, and breast with the red powder. At this sight Kamal forgot the Boisnavi, the bough, Kunda Nandini, and everything else.
Thus saying, Kamal went to look for a branch. On the way, she saw Satish, who had gotten hold of his aunt's vermilion, and was sitting,[104] smearing the red powder on his neck, nose, chin, and chest. Seeing this, Kamal forgot the Boisnavi, the branch, Kunda Nandini, and everything else.
Surja Mukhi sent for the servant Hira.
Surja Mukhi called for the servant Hira.
Hira's name has been mentioned once; it is now needful to give a particular account of her. Nagendra and his father always took special care that the female servants of the household should be of good character. With this design they offered good wages, and sought to engage servants of a superior class. The women servants of the house dwelt in happiness and esteem, therefore many respectable women of small means took service with them. Amongst these Hira was the principal. Many maid-servants are of the Kaystha caste. Hira was a Kaystha. Her grandmother had first been engaged as a servant, and Hira, being then a child, had come with her. When Hira became capable the old woman gave up service, built herself a house out of her savings, and dwelt in Govindpur. Hira entered the service of the Datta family. She was then about twenty[105] years of age, younger than most of the other servants, but in intelligence and in mental qualities their superior. Hira had been known in Govindpur from childhood as a widow, but no one had ever heard anything of her husband, neither had any one heard of any stain upon her character. She was something of a shrew. She dressed and adorned herself as one whose husband is living. She was beautiful, of brilliant complexion, lotus-eyed, short in stature, her face like the moon covered with clouds, her hair raised in front like a snake-hood.
Hira's name has been mentioned once; it’s now necessary to provide a detailed account of her. Nagendra and his father always made sure that the female servants in their house were of good character. To achieve this, they offered good wages and tried to hire staff from a higher class. The women working for them lived happily and with respect, so many decent women with modest means sought employment there. Among them, Hira was the main one. Many of the maids were from the Kaystha caste, and Hira was also a Kaystha. Her grandmother had initially been hired as a servant, and Hira, who was a child then, had come along with her. Once Hira grew up, the old woman retired, built her own house with her savings, and settled in Govindpur. Hira began working for the Datta family when she was about twenty[105] years old, younger than most of the other servants but smarter and more capable than them. Hira had been known as a widow in Govindpur since childhood, but nobody had ever mentioned her husband, nor was there any gossip about her character. She had a bit of a sharp temperament. She dressed and presented herself as if her husband were alive. She was beautiful, with a radiant complexion, lotus-like eyes, short in stature, a face like a moon obscured by clouds, and hair styled in a manner reminiscent of a snake's hood.
Hira was sitting alone singing. She made quarrels among the maids for her own amusement. She would frighten the cook in the dark, incite the boys to tease their parents to give them in marriage; if she saw any one sleeping she would paint the face with lime and ink. Truly she had many faults, as will appear by degrees. At present I will only add that if she saw attar or rose-water she would steal it.
Hira was sitting alone, singing. She stirred up trouble among the maids for her own entertainment. She would scare the cook in the dark, encourage the boys to annoy their parents about marriage, and if she spotted anyone sleeping, she would paint their face with lime and ink. She definitely had many flaws, as will become clear over time. For now, I’ll just say that if she saw any perfume or rose water, she would swipe it.
Surja Mukhi, calling Hira, said, "Do you know that Boisnavi?"[106]
Surja Mukhi, calling Hira, said, "Do you know Boisnavi?"[106]
"No," replied Hira. "I was never out of the neighbourhood, how should I know a Boisnavi beggar-man. Ask the women of the Thakur bari; Karuna or Sitala may know her."
"No," Hira replied. "I’ve never left the neighborhood, so how would I know a Boisnavi beggar? Ask the women at the Thakur bari; Karuna or Sitala might know her."
"This is not a Thakur bari Boisnavi. I want to know who she is, where her home is, and why she talks so much with Kunda. If you find all this out for me I will give you a new Benares sari, and send you to see the play."
"This isn't a Thakur bari Boisnavi. I want to know who she is, where she lives, and why she chats so much with Kunda. If you can find all this out for me, I'll give you a new Benares sari and send you to see the play."
At this offer Hira became very zealous, and asked, "When may I go to make inquiry?"
At this offer, Hira became very eager and asked, "When can I go to ask about it?"
"When you like; but if you do not follow her now you will not be able to trace her. Be careful that neither the Boisnavi nor any one else suspects you."
"When you want; but if you don't follow her now, you won't be able to find her later. Be careful that neither the Boisnavi nor anyone else suspects you."
At this moment Kamal returned, and, approving of Surja Mukhi's design, said to Hira, "And if you can, prick her with babla thorns."
At that moment, Kamal came back and, liking Surja Mukhi's idea, told Hira, "And if you can, poke her with babla thorns."
Hira said: "I will do all, but only a Benares sari will not content me."
Hira said, "I will do everything, but just a Benares sari won’t be enough for me."
"What do you want?" asked Surja.
"What do you want?" Surja asked.
"She wants a husband," said Kamal. "Give her in marriage."[107]
"She wants a husband," said Kamal. "Marry her off."[107]
"Very well," said Surja. "Would you like to have the Thakur Jamai?[8] Say so, and Kamal will arrange it."
"Alright," said Surja. "Do you want the Thakur Jamai?[8] Just let me know, and Kamal will take care of it."
[8] Thakur Jamai—Kamal Mani's husband.
"Then I will see," said Hira; "but there is already in the house a husband suited to my mind."
"Then I'll see," said Hira; "but there's already someone in the house who's right for me."
"Who is it?" asked Surja.
"Who's there?" asked Surja.
"Death," was Hira's reply.
"Death," Hira replied.


CHAPTER XIII.
NO!

n the evening of that day, Kunda was sitting near the talao[9] in the middle of the garden. The talao was broad; its water pure and always blue. The reader will remember that behind this talao was a flower-garden, in the midst of which stood a white marble house covered with creepers. In front, a flight of steps led down to the water. The steps were built of brick to resemble stone, [110]very broad and clean. On either side grew an aged bakul tree. Beneath these trees sat Kunda Nandini, alone in the darkening evening, gazing at the reflection of the sky and stars in the clear water. Here and there lotus flowers could be dimly seen. On the other three sides of the talao, mango, jak, plum, orange, lichi, cocoanut, kul, bel, and other fruit-trees grew thickly in rows, looking in the darkness like a wall with an uneven top. Occasionally the harsh voice of a bird in the branches broke the silence. The cool wind blowing over the talao caused the water slightly to wet the lotus flowers, gave the reflected sky an appearance of trembling, and murmured in the leaves above Kunda Nandini's head. The scent of the flowers of the bakul tree pervaded the air, mingled with that of jasmine and other blossoms. Everywhere fireflies flew in the darkness over the clear water, dancing, sparkling, becoming extinguished. Flying foxes talked to each other; jackals howled to keep off other animals. A few clouds having lost their way wandered over the sky; one or two stars fell as though overwhelmed with grief.[111] Kunda Nandini sat brooding over her troubles. Thus ran her thoughts: "All my family is gone. My mother, my brother, my father, all died. Why did I not die? If I could not die, why did I come here? Does the good man become a star when he dies?" Kunda no longer remembered the vision she had seen on the night of her father's death. It did not recur to her mind even now. Only a faint memory of the scene came to her with the idea that, since she had seen her mother in vision, that mother must have become a star. So she asked herself: "Do the good become stars after death? and if so, are all I loved become stars? Then which are they among those hosts? how can I determine? Can they see me—I who have wept so much? Let them go, I will think of them no more. It makes me weep; what is the use of weeping? Is it my fate to weep? If not, my mother—again these thoughts! let them go. Would it not be well to die? How to do it? Shall I drown myself? Should I become a star if I did that? Should I see? Should I see every day—whom? Can I not say whom? why can I[112] not pronounce the name? there is no one here who could hear it. Shall I please myself by uttering it for once? only in thought can I say it—Nagendra, my Nagendra! Oh, what do I say? my Nagendra! What am I? Surja Mukhi's Nagendra. How often have I uttered this name, and what is the use? If he could have married me instead of Surja Mukhi! Let it go! I shall drown myself. If I were to do that what would happen? To-morrow I should float on the water; all would hear of it. Nagendra—again I say it, Nagendra; if Nagendra heard of it what would he say? It will not do to drown myself; my body would swell, I should look ugly if he should see me! Can I take poison? What poison? Where should I get it? Who would bring it for me? Could I take it? I could, but not to-day. Let me please myself with the thought that he loves me. Is it true? Kamal Didi said so; but how can she know it? my conscience will not let me ask. Does he love me? How does he love me? What does he love—my beauty or me? Beauty? let me see." She went to examine the[113] reflection of her face in the water, but, failing to see anything, returned to her former place. "It cannot be; why do I think of that? Surja Mukhi is more beautiful than I. Haro Mani, Bishu, Mukta, Chandra, Prasunna, Bama, Pramada, are all more beautiful. Even Hira is more beautiful; yes, notwithstanding her dark complexion, her face is more beautiful. Then if it is not beauty, is it disposition? Let me think. I can't find any attraction in myself. Kamal said it to satisfy me. Why should he love me? Yet why should Kamal try to flatter me? Who knows? But I will not die; I will think of that. Though it is false I will ponder over it; I will think that true which is false. But I cannot go to Calcutta; I should not see him. I cannot, cannot go; yet if not, what shall I do? If Kamal's words are true, then those who have done so much for me are being made to suffer through me. I can see that there is something in Surja Mukhi's mind. True or false I will have to go; but I cannot! Then I must drown myself. If I must die I will die! Oh, my father! did you leave me here to such a[114] fate?" Then Kunda, putting her hands to her face, gave way to weeping. Suddenly the vision flashed into her mind; she started as if at a flash of lightning. "I had forgotten it all," she exclaimed. "Why had I forgotten it? My mother showed me my destiny, and bade me evade it by ascending to the stars. Why did I not go? Why did I not die? Why do I delay now? I will delay no longer." So saying, she began slowly to descend the steps. Kunda was but a woman, timid and cowardly; at each step she feared, at each step she shivered. Nevertheless she proceeded slowly with unshaken purpose to obey her mother's command. At this moment some one from behind touched her very gently on the shoulder. Some one said, "Kunda!" Kunda looked round. In the darkness she at once recognized Nagendra. Kunda thought no more that day of dying.
In the evening of that day, Kunda was sitting by the talao[9] in the middle of the garden. The talao was wide; its water was clear and always blue. Remember that behind this talao was a flower garden, in the center of which stood a white marble house covered with vines. In front, a set of steps led down to the water. The steps were made of bricks to look like stone, [110]very wide and clean. On either side grew old bakul trees. Beneath these trees sat Kunda Nandini, alone in the darkening evening, staring at the reflection of the sky and stars in the clear water. Here and there, lotus flowers could be faintly seen. On the other three sides of the talao, mango, jackfruit, plum, orange, lychee, coconut, and other fruit trees grew thickly in rows, looking in the darkness like a wall with an uneven top. Occasionally, the sharp call of a bird in the branches broke the silence. The cool breeze blowing over the talao caused the water to slightly wet the lotus flowers, made the reflected sky appear to shimmer, and whispered in the leaves above Kunda Nandini's head. The fragrance of the bakul flowers filled the air, blending with that of jasmine and other blossoms. Everywhere, fireflies danced in the darkness over the clear water, sparkling and then fading away. Flying foxes called to each other; jackals howled to scare off other animals. A few clouds, having lost their way, drifted across the sky; one or two stars fell as if burdened by sorrow.[111] Kunda Nandini sat lost in her troubles. Her thoughts went like this: "All my family is gone. My mother, my brother, my father—everyone has died. Why didn't I die? If I couldn’t die, why am I here? Do good people become stars when they die?" Kunda no longer remembered the vision she had seen on the night of her father's death. It did not come back to her now. Only a faint memory of that scene arose in her mind, along with the thought that since she had seen her mother in a vision, her mother must have become a star. So she asked herself: "Do good people really become stars after they die? If so, have all my loved ones become stars? Which ones are they among those countless stars? How can I know? Can they see me—I who have cried so much? Let them go, I won’t think of them anymore. It makes me cry; what's the point of crying? Is it my fate to cry? If not, my mother—these thoughts again! Let them go. Wouldn’t it be better to die? How do I do that? Should I drown myself? Would I become a star if I did that? Would I be able to see? Who would I see every day—whom? Why can’t I name them? There’s no one here to hear it. Should I satisfy myself by saying it once? I can only think it—Nagendra, my Nagendra! Oh, what am I saying? My Nagendra! Who am I? Surja Mukhi’s Nagendra. How often have I said his name, and what’s the point? If he could have married me instead of Surja Mukhi! Never mind! I’ll drown myself. But what would happen if I did? Tomorrow, I’d float on the water; everyone would hear about it. Nagendra—again I say it, Nagendra; if Nagendra heard about it, what would he think? I can’t drown myself; my body would swell, I’d look terrible if he saw me! Can I take poison? What kind of poison? Where would I get it? Who would bring it to me? Could I take it? I could, but not today. I’ll let myself think that he loves me. Is it true? Kamal Didi said so; but how can she know? My conscience prevents me from asking. Does he love me? How does he love me? What does he love—my looks or me? Looks? Let me see." She went to check her reflection in the water, but not seeing anything, returned to her previous spot. "It can't be; why do I think about that? Surja Mukhi is more beautiful than I am. Haro Mani, Bishu, Mukta, Chandra, Prasunna, Bama, Pramada—they're all more beautiful. Even Hira is more beautiful; yes, despite her dark skin, her face is prettier. Then if it’s not beauty, is it my character? Let me think. I can’t find anything appealing about myself. Kamal said it just to make me feel better. Why would he love me? But why would Kamal try to flatter me? Who knows? But I won't die; I will think about that. Even if it’s a lie, I’ll ponder it; I’ll convince myself that what’s false is true. But I can’t go to Calcutta; I shouldn’t see him. I can’t, I can’t go; but if not, what will I do? If Kamal’s words are true, then those who have done so much for me are having to suffer because of me. I can feel that there’s something on Surja Mukhi’s mind. True or false, I’ll have to go; but I can’t! Then I must drown myself. If I have to die, I will die! Oh, my father! Did you leave me here for such a[114] fate?" Then Kunda, putting her hands to her face, broke down in tears. Suddenly, a vision flashed into her mind; she jumped as if struck by lightning. "I had forgotten it all," she exclaimed. "Why did I forget? My mother showed me my destiny and told me to escape it by going to the stars. Why didn’t I go? Why didn’t I die? Why am I hesitating now? I won’t hesitate any longer." With that, she began slowly to walk down the steps. Kunda was just a woman, timid and fearful; at each step, she was apprehensive, at each step she trembled. Still, she moved slowly with unwavering resolve to follow her mother’s command. At that moment, someone from behind gently touched her shoulder. Someone called, "Kunda!" Kunda turned around. In the dark, she immediately recognized Nagendra. Kunda no longer thought about dying that day.
[9] Talao—usually rendered "tank" in English; but the word scarcely does justice to these reservoirs, which with their handsome flights of steps are quite ornamental.
[9] Talao—often translated as "tank" in English; however, that term hardly captures the essence of these reservoirs, which, with their beautiful staircases, are quite decorative.
And Nagendra, is this the stainless character you have preserved so long? Is this the return for your Surja Mukhi's devotion? Shame! shame! you are a thief; you are worse than[115] a thief. What could a thief have done to Surja Mukhi? He might have stolen her ornaments, her wealth, but you have come to destroy her heart. Surja Mukhi never bestowed anything upon the thief, therefore if he stole, he was but a thief. But to you Surja Mukhi gave her all; therefore you are committing the worst of thefts. Nagendra, it were better for you to die. If you have the courage, drown yourself.
And Nagendra, is this the pure character you've held onto for so long? Is this how you repay Surja Mukhi's loyalty? Shame! Shame! You're a thief; you're worse than a thief. What could a thief have done to Surja Mukhi? He might have taken her jewelry, her money, but you have come to break her heart. Surja Mukhi never gave anything to the thief, so if he stole, he was just a thief. But to you, Surja Mukhi gave her everything; that's why you're committing the worst kind of theft. Nagendra, it would be better for you to die. If you have any courage, drown yourself.
Shame! shame! Kunda Nandini; why do you tremble at the touch of a thief? Why are the words of a thief as a thorn in the flesh? See, Kunda Nandini! the water is pure, cool, pleasant; will you plunge into it? will you not die?
Shame! Shame! Kunda Nandini; why do you shake at the touch of a thief? Why do the words of a thief feel like thorns in your side? Look, Kunda Nandini! The water is clear, cool, and inviting; will you dive into it? Are you afraid you’ll drown?
Kunda Nandini did not wish to die.
Kunda Nandini didn’t want to die.
The robber said: "Kunda, will you go to-morrow to Calcutta? Do you go willingly?"
The robber asked, "Kunda, are you going to Calcutta tomorrow? Are you going willingly?"
Willingly—alas! alas! Kunda wiped her eyes, but did not speak.
Willingly—oh no! Kunda dried her tears, but stayed silent.
"Kunda, why do you weep? Listen. With much difficulty I have endured so long; I cannot bear it longer. I cannot say how I have lived through it. Though I have struggled so hard,[116] yet see how degraded I am. I have become a drunkard. I can struggle no longer; I cannot let you go. Listen, Kunda. Now widow marriage is allowed I will marry you, if you consent."
"Kunda, why are you crying? Listen. I've held on for so long with so much difficulty; I can't take it anymore. I can't even explain how I've managed to get through this. Even though I've fought so hard,[116] just look at how low I've fallen. I've become a drunkard. I can't fight any longer; I can't let you go. Listen, Kunda. Now that widow remarriage is accepted, I want to marry you, if you're okay with it."
This time Kunda spoke; she said "No."
This time Kunda spoke and said, "No."
"Why, Kunda? do you think widow marriage unholy?"
"Why, Kunda? Do you think marrying a widow is wrong?"
"No."
"Nope."
"Then why not? Say, say, will you be my wife or not? will you love me or no?"
"Then why not? Come on, will you be my wife or not? Will you love me or not?"
"No."
"Nope."
Then Nagendra, as though he had a thousand tongues, entreated her with heart-piercing words. Still Kunda said "No."
Then Nagendra, as if he had a thousand tongues, pleaded with her using heart-wrenching words. Still, Kunda said "No."
Nagendra looked at the pure, cold water, and asked himself, "Can I lie there?"
Nagendra looked at the clear, cold water and asked himself, "Can I lie down there?"
To herself Kunda said: "No, widow marriage is allowed in the Shastras; it is not on that account."
To herself, Kunda said, "No, widow marriage is allowed in the scriptures; it’s not for that reason."
Why, then, did she not seek the water?
Why didn’t she go after the water?


CHAPTER XIV.
LIKE TO LIKE.

aridasi Boisnavi, returning to the garden-house, suddenly became Debendra Babu, and sat down and smoked his huka, drinking brandy freely at intervals until he became intoxicated.
aridasi Boisnavi, returning to the garden house, suddenly transformed into Debendra Babu, sat down, and smoked his huka, drinking brandy liberally at intervals until he got drunk.
Then Surendra entered, sat down by Debendra, and after inquiring after his health, said, "Where have you been to-day again?"
Then Surendra came in, sat down next to Debendra, and after asking how he was doing, said, "Where have you been today?"
"Have you heard of this so soon?" said Debendra.
"Have you heard about this already?" said Debendra.
"This is another mistake of yours. You imagine that what you do is hidden, that no one[118] can know anything about it; but it is known all over the place."
"This is another mistake you've made. You think that your actions are secret, that no one[118] knows anything about it; but it's common knowledge everywhere."
"I have no desire to hide anything," said Debendra.
"I don’t want to hide anything," said Debendra.
"It reflects no credit upon you. So long as you show the least shame we have some hope of you. If you had any shame left, would you expose yourself in the village as a Boisnavi?"
"It doesn’t reflect well on you. As long as you show even a little shame, we have some hope for you. If you had any shame left, would you really expose yourself in the village as a Boisnavi?"
Said Debendra, laughing, "What a jolly Boisnavi I was! Were you not charmed with my get-up?"
Said Debendra, laughing, "What a fun Boisnavi I was! Weren't you impressed with my outfit?"
"I did not see you in that base disguise," replied Surendra, "or I would have given you a taste of the whip." Then snatching the glass from Debendra's hand, he said, "Now do listen seriously while you are in your senses; after that, drink if you will."
"I didn't recognize you in that basic disguise," Surendra said, "or I would have given you a taste of the whip." Then, grabbing the glass from Debendra's hand, he added, "Now listen carefully while you're sober; you can drink after."
"Speak, brother," said Debendra; "why are you angry to-day? I think the atmosphere of Hembati has corrupted you."
"Talk to me, brother," said Debendra; "why are you upset today? I think the vibe of Hembati has gotten to you."
Surendra, lending no ear to his evil words, said, "Whose destruction are you seeking to compass by assuming this disguise?"[119]
Surendra, ignoring his malicious words, said, "Whose downfall are you trying to achieve by putting on this disguise?"[119]
"Do you not know?" was the reply. "Don't you remember the schoolmaster's marriage to a goddess? This goddess is now a widow, and lives with the Datta family in that village. I went to see her."
"Don't you know?" was the reply. "Don't you remember that the schoolmaster married a goddess? This goddess is now a widow and lives with the Datta family in that village. I went to see her."
"Have you not gone far enough in vice? Are you not satisfied yet, that you wish to ruin that unprotected girl? See, Debendra, you are so sinful, so cruel, so destructive, that we can hardly associate with you any longer."
"Have you not gone far enough in your wrongdoings? Aren't you satisfied yet that you want to ruin that vulnerable girl? Look, Debendra, you are so sinful, so cruel, so destructive, that we can barely associate with you anymore."
Surendra said this with so much firmness that Debendra was quite stunned. Then he said, seriously: "Do not be angry with me; my heart is not under my own control. I can give up everything else but the hope of possessing this woman. Since the day I first saw her in Tara Charan's house I have been under the power of her beauty. In my eyes there is no such beauty anywhere. As in fever the patient is burned with thirst, from that day my passion for her has burned within me. I cannot relate the many attempts I have made to see her. Until now I had not succeeded. By means of this Boisnavi dress I have[120] accomplished my desire. There is no cause for you to fear. She is a virtuous woman."
Surendra said this with such conviction that Debendra was taken aback. Then he replied seriously, "Please don't be angry with me; I can't control my feelings. I could give up everything else, but I can't give up the hope of being with this woman. Ever since I first saw her at Tara Charan's house, I've been captivated by her beauty. To me, there's no one more beautiful. Like a patient suffering from fever who is consumed by thirst, my desire for her has been burning inside me since that day. I can't even begin to describe all the times I've tried to see her. Until now, I hadn't succeeded. But with this Boisnavi dress, I have[120] achieved my goal. There's no need for you to worry. She is a virtuous woman."
"Then why do you go?" asked his friend.
"Then why are you leaving?" asked his friend.
"Only to see her. I cannot describe what satisfaction I have found in seeing her, talking with her, singing to her."
"Just to see her. I can't explain the satisfaction I've gained from seeing her, talking with her, singing to her."
"I am speaking seriously, not jesting. If you do not abandon this evil purpose, then our intercourse must end. More than that, I shall become your enemy."
"I’m being serious, not joking. If you don’t give up this wicked intention, then our relationship has to end. What’s more, I will become your enemy."
"You are my only friend," said Debendra; "I would lose half of what I possess rather than lose you. Still, I confess I would rather lose you than give up the hope of seeing Kunda Nandini."
"You’re my only friend," Debendra said. "I’d give up half of what I own before I’d lose you. Still, I have to admit I’d rather lose you than lose hope of seeing Kunda Nandini."
"Then it must be so. I can no longer associate with you."
"Then it has to be like that. I can't be around you anymore."
Thus saying, Surendra departed with a sorrowful heart.
Thus saying, Surendra left with a heavy heart.
Debendra, greatly afflicted at losing his one friend, sat some time in repentant thought. At length he said: "Let it go! in this world who cares for any one? Each for himself!"
Debendra, deeply troubled by the loss of his only friend, sat for a while lost in regretful thought. Finally, he said, "Forget it! In this world, who really cares about anyone? Everyone's out for themselves!"
Then filling his glass he drank, and under the[121] influence of the liquor his heart quickly became joyous. Closing his eyes, he began to sing some doggerel beginning—
Then filling his glass, he drank, and under the[121] influence of the liquor, his heart quickly became joyful. Closing his eyes, he started to sing some silly rhyme that began—
Presently a voice answered from without—
Presently, a voice responded from outside—
He is talking in his cups; I can't bear to see it."
He’s talking nonsense; I can't stand to watch it.
Debendra, hearing the voice, called out noisily, "Who are you—a male or female spirit?"
Debendra, hearing the voice, shouted, "Who are you—a man or a woman spirit?"
Then, jingling her bangles, the spirit entered and sat down by Debendra. The spirit was covered with a sari, bracelets on her arms, on her neck a charm, ornaments in her ears, silver chain round her waist, on her ankles rings. She was scented with attar.
Then, jingling her bracelets, the spirit came in and sat down next to Debendra. She was dressed in a sari, wearing bracelets on her arms, a charm around her neck, earrings, a silver chain around her waist, and rings on her ankles. She smelled of perfume.
Debendra held a light near to the face of the spirit. He did not know her.
Debendra held a light up to the spirit's face. He didn't know her.
Gently he said, "Who are you? and from whence do you come?" Then holding the light in another direction, he asked, "Whose spirit are you?" At last, finding he could not steady him[122]self, he said, "Go for to-day; I will worship you with cakes and flesh of goat on the night of the dark moon."[10]
Gently he said, "Who are you? And where do you come from?" Then, holding the light in another direction, he asked, "Whose spirit are you?" Finally, realizing he couldn't steady himself, he said, "Leave for today; I will honor you with cakes and goat meat on the night of the new moon."[10]
Then the spirit, laughing, said, "Are you well, Boisnavi Didi?"
Then the spirit, laughing, said, "Are you okay, Boisnavi Didi?"
"Good heavens!" said the tipsy one, "are you a spirit from the Datta family?" Thus saying, he again held the lamp near her face; moving it hither and thither all round, he gravely examined the woman. At last, throwing down the lamp, he began to sing, "Who are you? Surely I know you. Where have I seen you?"
"Good heavens!" said the drunk one, "are you a ghost from the Datta family?" Saying this, he held the lamp close to her face again; moving it around, he seriously examined the woman. Finally, dropping the lamp, he started to sing, "Who are you? I definitely know you. Where have I seen you before?"
The woman replied, "I am Hira."
The woman replied, "I'm Hira."
"Hurrah! Three cheers for Hira!" Exclaiming thus, the drunken man began to jump about. Then, falling flat on the floor, he saluted Hira, and with glass in hand began to sing in her praise.
"Hooray! Three cheers for Hira!" the drunken man shouted as he started to dance around. Then, he fell flat on the floor, raised his glass to Hira, and began to sing her praises.
Hira had discovered during the day that Haridasi Boisnavi and Debendra Babu were one and the same person. But with what design Debendra had entered the house of the Dattas it was not [123]so easy to discover. To find this out, Hira had come to Debendra's house; only Hira would have had courage for such a deed. She now said:
Hira had found out during the day that Haridasi Boisnavi and Debendra Babu were actually the same person. But figuring out why Debendra had come to the Dattas' house wasn’t [123] so simple. To uncover this, Hira had gone to Debendra's house; only Hira would have had the guts to do something like this. She now said:
"What is my purpose? To day a thief entered the Datta's house and committed a robbery—I have come to seize the robber."
"What is my purpose? Today, a thief broke into the Datta's house and stole something—I have come to catch the robber."
Hearing this, the Babu said: "It is true I went to steal; but, Hira, I went not to steal jewels or pearls, but to seek flowers and fruits."
Hearing this, the Babu said: "It's true I went to steal; but, Hira, I didn't go to steal jewels or pearls, I went to gather flowers and fruits."
"What flower? Kunda?"
"What flower? Kunda?"
"Hurrah! Yes, Kunda. Three cheers for Kunda Nandini! I adore her."
"Hooray! Yes, Kunda. Three cheers for Kunda Nandini! I love her."
"I have come from Kunda Nandini."
"I’m from Kunda Nandini."
"Hurrah! Speak! speak! What has she sent you to say? Yes, I remember; why should it not be? For three years we have loved each other."
"Hooray! Talk! Talk! What did she send you to say? Yes, I remember; why shouldn't it be? We’ve loved each other for three years."
Hira was astonished, but wishing to hear more, she said: "I did not know you had loved so long. How did you first make love to her?"
Hira was amazed, but wanting to know more, she asked, "I didn't realize you had loved her for so long. How did you first fall in love with her?"
"There is no difficulty in that. From my friendship with Tara Charan, I asked him to introduce me to his wife. He did so, and from that time I have loved her."[124]
"There’s no trouble with that. Because of my friendship with Tara Charan, I asked him to introduce me to his wife. He did, and ever since then, I’ve loved her."[124]
"After that what happened?" asked Hira.
"Then what happened?" Hira asked.
"After that, because of your mistress's anger, I did not see Kunda for many days. Then I entered the house as a Boisnavi. The girl is very timid, she will not speak; but the way in which I coaxed her to-day is sure to take effect. Why should it not succeed? Am I not Debendra? Learn well, oh lover! the art of winning hearts!"
"After that, because your mistress was angry, I didn't see Kunda for many days. Then I went into the house as a Boisnavi. The girl is very shy and doesn't speak much; but the way I encouraged her today is bound to work. Why wouldn't it? Am I not Debendra? Learn well, oh lover! the art of winning hearts!"
Then Hira said: "It has become very late; now good-bye," and smiling gently she arose and departed.
Then Hira said, "It's getting really late; so, goodbye," and with a gentle smile, she stood up and left.
Debendra fell into a drunken sleep.
Debendra passed out from drinking.
Early the next morning Hira related to Surja Mukhi all that she had heard from Debendra—his three years' passion, and his present attempt to play the lover to Kunda Nandini in the disguise of a Boisnavi.
Early the next morning, Hira told Surja Mukhi everything she had heard from Debendra—his three years of passion and his current attempt to woo Kunda Nandini while posing as a Boisnavi.
Then Surja Mukhi's blue eyes grew inflamed with anger, the crimson veins on her temples stood out. Kamal also heard it all.
Then Surja Mukhi's blue eyes filled with rage, the red veins on her temples highlighted. Kamal heard everything too.
Surja Mukhi sent for Kunda Nandini, and when she came said to her—
Surja Mukhi called for Kunda Nandini, and when she arrived, she said to her—
"Kunda, we have learned who Haridasi Boisnavi[125] is. We know that he is your paramour. I now know your true character. We give no place in our house to such a woman. Take yourself away from here, otherwise Hira shall drive you away with a broom."
"Kunda, we've found out who Haridasi Boisnavi[125] is. We know he's your lover. I now see your true colors. We won’t allow someone like you in our home. Get out of here; otherwise, Hira will chase you away with a broom."
Kunda trembled. Kamal saw that she was about to fall, and led her away to her own chamber. Remaining there, she comforted Kunda as well as she could, saying, "Let the Bou (wife) say what she will, I do not believe a word of it."
Kunda shook with fear. Kamal noticed she was about to collapse and guided her to her room. Once there, she tried her best to console Kunda, saying, "No matter what the Bou (wife) says, I don’t believe any of it."


CHAPTER XV.
THE FORLORN ONE.

n the depth of night, when all were sleeping, Kunda Nandini opened the door of her chamber and went forth. With but one dress, the seventeen-year-old girl left the house of Surja Mukhi, and leaped alone into the ocean of the world. Kunda had never set foot outside the house; she could not tell in which direction to go.
In the middle of the night, when everyone was asleep, Kunda Nandini opened the door of her room and stepped out. Wearing just one dress, the seventeen-year-old girl left Surja Mukhi's house and jumped alone into the vast world. Kunda had never been outside the house; she didn't know which way to go.
The dark body of the large house loomed against the sky. Kunda wandered for some time in the dark; then she remembered that a light was usually to be seen from Nagendra's room. She[128] knew how to reach the spot; and thinking that she would refresh her eyes by seeking that light, she went to that side of the house. The shutters were open, the sash closed. In the darkness three lights gleamed; insects were hovering near trying to reach the light, but the glass repelled them. Kunda in her heart sympathized with these insects. Her infatuated eyes dwelt upon the light; she could not bring herself to leave it. She sat beneath some casuarina-trees near the window, every now and then watching the fireflies dancing in the trees. In the sky black clouds chased each other, only a star or two being visible at intervals. All round the house rows of casuarina-trees raising their heads into the clouds, stood like apparitions of the night. At the touch of the wind these giant-faced apparitions whispered in their ghost language over Kunda Nandini's head. The very ghosts, in their fear of the terrible night, spoke in low voices. Occasionally the open shutters of the window flapped against the walls. Black owls hooted as they sat upon the house; sometimes a dog seeing another animal rushed after it; sometimes[129] a twig or a fruit fell to the ground. In the distance the cocoanut palms waved their heads, the rustling of the leaves of the fan palm reached the ear. Over all the light streamed, and the insect troop came and went. Kunda sat there gazing.
The dark silhouette of the large house loomed against the sky. Kunda wandered for a while in the darkness; then she remembered that there was usually a light coming from Nagendra's room. She[128] knew the way to get there, and thinking it would soothe her eyes to look for that light, she headed toward that side of the house. The shutters were open, and the window was closed. In the darkness, three lights sparkled; insects hovered around, trying to reach the light, but the glass kept them away. Kunda felt a sense of sympathy for these insects. Her enchanted gaze lingered on the light; she just couldn't bring herself to leave it. She sat beneath some casuarina trees near the window, occasionally watching the fireflies dancing in the trees. Black clouds raced across the sky, with only a star or two visible now and then. Surrounding the house, rows of casuarina trees stretched up to the clouds, like spirits of the night. When the wind brushed against them, these towering figures whispered in a ghostly language above Kunda Nandini's head. Even the ghosts, frightened by the ominous night, spoke in hushed tones. Occasionally, the open shutters of the window banged against the walls. Black owls hooted as they perched on the house; sometimes a dog chased after another animal; other times[129] a twig or a piece of fruit fell to the ground. In the distance, coconut palms swayed, and the rustling leaves of the fan palm reached her ears. A stream of light illuminated everything, while the insects came and went. Kunda sat there, gazing.
A sash is gently opened; the figure of a man appears against the light. Alas! it is Nagendra's figure. Nagendra, what if you should discover the flower, Kunda, under the trees? What if, seeing you in the window, the sound of her beating heart should make itself heard? What if, hearing this sound, she should know that if you move and become invisible her happiness will be gone? Nagendra, you are standing out of the light; move it so that she can see you. Kunda is very wretched; stand there that the clear water of the pool with the stars reflected in it may not recur to her mind. Listen! the black owl hoots! Should you move, Kunda will be terrified by the lightning. See there! the black clouds, pressed by the wind, meet as though in battle. There will be a rainstorm: who will shelter Kunda? See there! you have opened the sash, swarms of insects are[130] rushing into your room. Kunda thinks, "If I am virtuous, shall I be born again as an insect?" Kunda thinks she would like to share the fate of the insects. "I have scorched myself, why do I not die?"
A window is gently opened; a man’s figure is silhouetted against the light. Unfortunately, it’s Nagendra. What if you find the flower, Kunda, beneath the trees? What if, seeing you in the window, the sound of her racing heart becomes audible? What if, hearing that sound, she realizes that if you move and disappear, her happiness will be lost? Nagendra, you're standing in the shadows; shift so she can see you. Kunda is in such despair; stand there so that the clear water of the pool, with its stars reflected in it, doesn’t come to her mind. Listen! The black owl hoots! If you move, Kunda will be frightened by the lightning. Look! The dark clouds, pushed by the wind, clash as if in battle. A storm is coming: who will protect Kunda? Look! You've opened the window, and swarms of insects are rushing into your room. Kunda thinks, "If I'm virtuous, will I be reborn as an insect?" Kunda wishes she could share the fate of the insects. "I’ve suffered enough, why don’t I just die?"
Nagendra, shutting the sash, moves away. Cruel! what harm you have done. You have no business waking in the night; go to sleep. Kunda Nandini is dying; let her die!—she would gladly do so to save you a headache. Now the lightened window has become dark. Looking—looking—wiping her eyes, Kunda Nandini arose and took the path before her. The ghost-like shrubs, murmuring, asked, "Whither goest thou?" the fan palms rustled, "Whither dost thou go?" the owl's deep voice asked the same question. The window said, "Let her go—no more will I show to her Nagendra." Then foolish Kunda Nandini gazed once more in that direction.
Nagendra, closing the window, walked away. Cruel! Look at the damage you've caused. You shouldn’t be awake at this hour; just go to sleep. Kunda Nandini is dying; let her die!—she would happily do so to spare you a headache. Now that bright window has turned dark. Looking—looking—wiping her eyes, Kunda Nandini got up and took the path ahead of her. The ghostly shrubs whispered, "Where are you going?" the fan palms rustled, "Where are you off to?" the owl's deep voice asked the same thing. The window said, "Let her go—I'm done showing her Nagendra." Then foolish Kunda Nandini glanced back in that direction one last time.
Oh, iron-hearted Surja Mukhi, arise! think what you have done. Make the forlorn one return.
Oh, tough-hearted Surja Mukhi, get up! Consider what you've done. Bring the lost one back.
Kunda went on, on, on; again the clouds clashed, the sky became as night, the lightning flashed, the[131] wind moaned, the clouds thundered. Kunda! Kunda! whither goest thou? The storm came—first the sound, then clouds of dust, then leaves torn from the trees borne by the wind; at last, plash, plash, the rain. Kunda, with thy one garment, whither goest thou?
Kunda kept going; again the clouds collided, the sky turned dark, the lightning lit up, the[131] wind howled, and the clouds rumbled. Kunda! Kunda! where are you going? The storm approached—first the sound, then clouds of dust, then leaves ripped from the trees carried by the wind; finally, plash, plash, the rain came. Kunda, with just one piece of clothing, where are you headed?
By the flashes of lightning Kunda saw a hut: its walls were of mud, supporting a low roof. She sat down within the doorway, resting against the door. In doing this she made some noise. The house owner being awake heard the noise, but thought it was made by the storm; but a dog, who slept within near the door, barking loudly, alarmed the householder, who timidly opened the door, and seeing only a desolate woman, asked, "Who is there?" No reply. "Who are you, woman?"
By the flashes of lightning, Kunda saw a hut with mud walls and a low roof. She sat down in the doorway, leaning against the door. This made some noise. The owner of the house, awake, heard it but thought it was just the storm. However, a dog sleeping near the door started barking loudly, which startled the homeowner. Cautiously, he opened the door and, seeing only a lonely woman, asked, "Who’s there?" No reply. "Who are you, woman?"
Kunda said, "I am standing here because of the storm."
Kunda said, "I'm here because of the storm."
"What? What? Speak again."
"What? Huh? Say that again."
Kunda repeated her words.
Kunda echoed her words.
The householder recognizing the voice, drew Kunda indoors, and, making a fire, discovered herself to be Hira. She comforted Kunda,[132] saying, "I understand—you have run away from the scolding; have no fear, I will tell no one. You shall stay with me for a couple of days."
The householder, realizing who was speaking, pulled Kunda inside and, after starting a fire, revealed that she was Hira. She reassured Kunda,[132] saying, "I get it—you've escaped the yelling; don't worry, I won't tell anyone. You can stay with me for a few days."
Hira's dwelling was surrounded by a wall. Inside were a couple of clean mud-built huts. The walls of the rooms were decorated with figures of flowers, birds, and gods. In the court-yard grew red-leaved vegetables, and near them jasmine and roses. The gardener from the Babu's house had planted them. If Hira had wished, he would have given her anything from the Babu's garden. His profit in this was that Hira with her own hand prepared his huka and handed it to him.
Hira's home was enclosed by a wall. Inside were a few tidy mud huts. The room walls featured designs of flowers, birds, and deities. In the courtyard, red-leaved vegetables flourished, alongside jasmine and roses. The gardener from the Babu's house had planted them. If Hira had wanted, he would have given her anything from the Babu's garden. His benefit from this was that Hira personally made his huka and served it to him.
In one of the huts Hira slept; in the other her grandmother. Hira made up a bed for Kunda beside her own. Kunda lay there, but did not sleep. Kunda desired to remain hidden, and therefore consented to be locked in the room on the following day when Hira went to her work, so that she should not be seen by the grandmother. At noon, when the grandmother went to bathe, Hira, coming home, permitted Kunda to bathe and eat. After this meal Kunda was again locked in,[133] and Hira returned to her work till night, when she again made up the beds as before.
In one of the huts, Hira slept; in the other, her grandmother. Hira set up a bed for Kunda next to her own. Kunda laid there but couldn’t sleep. Kunda wanted to stay hidden, so she agreed to be locked in the room the next day when Hira went to work, ensuring she wouldn’t be seen by the grandmother. At noon, when the grandmother went to bathe, Hira came home and allowed Kunda to bathe and eat. After this meal, Kunda was locked in again,[133] and Hira returned to work until night, when she made up the beds again as before.
Creak, creak, creak—the sound of the chain of the outer door gently shaken. Hira was astonished. One person only, the gatekeeper, sometimes shook the chain to give warning at night. But in his hand the chain did not speak so sweetly; it spoke threateningly, as though to say, "If you do not open, I will break the door." Now it seemed to say, "How are you, my Hira? Arise, my jewel of a Hira!" Hira arose, and opening the outer door saw a woman. At first she was puzzled, but in a moment, recognizing the visitor, she exclaimed, "Oh, Ganga jal![11] how fortunate I am!"
Creak, creak, creak—the sound of the outer door's chain gently rattling. Hira was shocked. Only one person, the gatekeeper, usually rattled the chain to signal at night. But this time, in his hand, the chain didn’t sound sweet; it sounded ominous, as if to say, "If you don't open up, I will break down the door." Now, it seemed to say, "How are you, my Hira? Come on, my precious Hira!" Hira got up and, opening the outer door, saw a woman. At first, she was confused, but in a moment, recognizing the visitor, she exclaimed, "Oh, Ganga jal![11] how lucky I am!"
[11] Ganga jal—Ganges water; a pet name given by Hira to Malati. To receive this at the moment of death it essential to salvation; therefore Hira expresses the hope to meet Malati in the hour of death.
[11] Ganga jal—Ganges water; a nickname that Hira gave to Malati. Receiving this at the moment of death is crucial for salvation; therefore, Hira expresses the hope to be with Malati in the last moments of life.
Hira's Ganga jal was Malati the milk-woman, whose home was at Debipur, near Debendra Babu's house. She was a merry woman, from thirty to thirty-two years of age, dressed in a sari and wearing shell bracelets, her lips red from the [134]spices she ate; her complexion was almost fair, with red spots on her cheeks; her nose flat, her temples tattooed, a quid of tobacco in her cheek. Malati was not a servant of Debendra's, not even a dependent, but yet a follower; the services that others refused to perform, he obtained from her.
Hira's Ganga jal was Malati, the milk-woman, who lived in Debipur, close to Debendra Babu's house. She was a cheerful woman, around thirty to thirty-two years old, dressed in a sari and wearing shell bracelets, her lips red from the [134] spices she enjoyed; her complexion was nearly fair, with red spots on her cheeks; her nose was flat, her temples were tattooed, and she had a quid of tobacco in her cheek. Malati wasn't a servant of Debendra or even a dependent, but rather a follower; he got her to do the tasks that others refused to take on.
At sight of this woman the cunning Hira said: "Sister Ganga jal! may I meet you at my last moment; but why have you come now?"
At the sight of this woman, the sly Hira said: "Sister Ganga jal! I hope to see you at my final moment; but why are you here now?"
Malati whispered, "Debendra Babu wants you."
Malati whispered, "Mr. Debendra wants to see you."
Hira, with a laugh: "Are you not to get anything?"
Hira, laughing: "Aren't you going to get anything?"
Malati answered, "You best know what you mean. Come at once."
Malati replied, "You know what you mean best. Come right now."
As Hira desired to go, she told Kunda that she was called to her master's house, and must go to see what was wanted. Then extinguishing the light, she put on her dress and ornaments, and accompanied Ganga jal, the two singing as they went some love song.
As Hira wanted to leave, she told Kunda that she was summoned to her master's house and needed to see what was required. After turning off the light, she got dressed and put on her jewelry, and along with Ganga jal, the two sang a love song as they went.
Hira went alone into Debendra's boita khana. He had been drinking, but not heavily; he was[135] quite sensible. His manner to Hira was altogether changed; he paid her no compliments, but said: "I had taken so much that evening that I did not understand what you said. Why did you come that night? it is to know this that I have sent for you. You told me Kunda Nandini sent you, but you did not give her message. I suppose that was because you found me so much overcome; but you can tell me now."
Hira went alone into Debendra's boita khana. He had been drinking, but not too much; he was[135] fairly clear-headed. His attitude towards Hira was completely different; he didn't give her any compliments, but instead said, "I had enough to drink that night that I didn’t really catch what you said. Why did you come that night? That’s why I asked you to come. You told me Kunda Nandini sent you, but you didn’t share her message. I guess you held back because you saw I was so out of it; but you can tell me now."
"Kunda Nandini did not send me to say anything."
"Kunda Nandini didn't send me to say anything."
"Then why did you come?" replied Debendra.
"Then why did you come?" Debendra asked.
"I only came to see you."
"I just came to see you."
Debendra laughed. "You are very intelligent. Nagendra Babu is fortunate in possessing such a servant. I thought the talk about Kunda Nandini was a mere pretence. You came to inquire after Haridasi Boisnavi. You came to know my design in wearing the Boisnavi garb; why I went to the Datta house: this you came to learn, and in part you accomplished your purpose. I do not seek to hide the matter. You did your master's work, and have received your reward from him, no doubt.[136] I have a commission for you; do it, and I also will reward you."
Debendra laughed. "You're really smart. Nagendra Babu is lucky to have such a servant. I thought the talk about Kunda Nandini was just a cover. You came to ask about Haridasi Boisnavi. You wanted to figure out my reason for wearing the Boisnavi outfit; why I went to the Datta house: that's what you were after, and you've partly succeeded. I'm not trying to hide anything. You did your master's job and have probably received your reward from him already.[136] I have a task for you; do it, and I'll reward you too."
It would be an unpleasant task to relate in detail the speech of a man so deeply sunk in vice. Debendra, promising Hira an abundant reward, proposed to buy Kunda Nandini.
It would be an uncomfortable task to describe in detail the words of a man so deeply lost in vice. Debendra, promising Hira a generous reward, suggested buying Kunda Nandini.
At his words Hira's eyes reddened, her ears became like fire. When he had finished she rose and said—
At his words, Hira's eyes turned red, and her ears felt like they were on fire. When he finished, she stood up and said—
"Sir, addressing me as a servant, you have said this to me. It is not for me to reply. I will tell my master, and he will give you a suitable answer." Then she went quickly out.
"Sir, you’ve spoken to me as if I were your servant. It’s not my place to respond. I’ll inform my master, and he will give you an appropriate answer." Then she hurried out.
For some moments Debendra sat puzzled and cowed. Then to revive himself he returned to the brandy, and the songs in which he usually indulged.
For a while, Debendra sat confused and intimidated. Then, to lift his spirits, he went back to the brandy and the songs he usually enjoyed.


CHAPTER XVI.
HIRA'S ENVY

ising in the morning, Hira went to her work. For the past two days there had been a great tumult in the Datta house, because Kunda Nandini was not to be found. It was known to all the household that she had gone away in anger. It was also known to some of the neighbours. Nagendra heard that Kunda had gone, but no one told him the reason. He thought to himself, "Kunda has left because she does not think it right to remain in the house after what I said to her. If so, why does she not go with Kamal?"[138] Nagendra's brow was clouded. No one ventured to come near him. He knew not what fault Surja Mukhi had committed, yet he held no intercourse with her, but sent a female spy into the neighbourhood to make search for Kunda Nandini.
Waking up in the morning, Hira went to work. For the past two days, there had been a lot of chaos in the Datta house because Kunda Nandini was missing. Everyone in the house knew she had left in anger, and some of the neighbors were aware of it too. Nagendra heard that Kunda was gone, but no one told him why. He thought to himself, "Kunda has left because she feels it's wrong to stay in the house after what I said to her. If that's the case, why isn't she with Kamal?"[138] Nagendra's face was tense. No one dared to approach him. He didn't know what Surja Mukhi had done wrong, but he avoided any interaction with her and instead sent a woman to the neighborhood to search for Kunda Nandini.
Surja Mukhi was much distressed on hearing of Kunda's flight, especially as Kamal Mani had assured her that what Debendra had said was not worthy of credit: for if she had had any bond with Debendra during three years, it could not have remained unknown; and Kunda's disposition gave no reason for suspicion of such a thing. Debendra was a drunkard, and in his cups he spoke falsely. Thinking over this, Surja Mukhi's distress increased. In addition to that, her husband's displeasure hurt her severely. A hundred times she abused Kunda—a thousand times she blamed herself. She also sent people in search of Kunda.
Surja Mukhi was really upset when she heard about Kunda's escape, especially since Kamal Mani had assured her that Debendra's claims weren’t credible. If she had had any connection with Debendra over the past three years, it would have definitely been known; plus, Kunda's character gave no reason to suspect anything. Debendra was a drunk, and when he drank, he lied. Thinking about this just made Surja Mukhi more distressed. On top of that, her husband's anger deeply affected her. She cursed Kunda a hundred times and blamed herself a thousand times. She also sent people to look for Kunda.
Kamal's postponed her departure for Calcutta. She abused no one. She did not use a word of scolding to Surja Mukhi. Loosening her necklace from her throat, she showed it to all the house[139]hold, saying, "I will give this to whomsoever will bring Kunda back."
Kamal delayed her trip to Calcutta. She didn’t insult anyone. She didn’t say a harsh word to Surja Mukhi. Taking off her necklace, she displayed it to everyone in the house[139]hold, saying, "I will give this to whoever brings Kunda back."
The guilty Hira heard and saw all this, but said nothing. Seeing the necklace she coveted it, but repressed her desire. On the second day, arranging her work, she went at noon, at which hour her grandmother would be bathing, to give Kunda her meal. At night the two made their bed, and laid down together. Neither Hira nor Kunda slept: Kunda was kept awake by her sorrow; Hira by the mingled happiness and trouble of her thoughts. But whatever her thoughts were she did not give them words—they remained hidden.
The guilty Hira heard and saw everything, but didn’t say a word. When she spotted the necklace, she wanted it but kept her desire in check. The next day, while organizing her tasks, she went at noon, when her grandmother would be bathing, to bring Kunda her meal. At night, the two made their bed and lay down together. Neither Hira nor Kunda could sleep: Kunda was restless because of her sadness, and Hira was kept awake by a mix of happiness and worry. But whatever was on her mind, she didn’t share it—they stayed hidden.
Oh, Hira! Hira! you have not an evil countenance, you too are young; why this vice in your heart? Why did the Creator betray her? Because the Creator betrayed her, does she therefore wish to betray others? If Hira were in Surja Mukhi's place, would she be so deceitful? Hira says "No!" But sitting in Hira's place she speaks as Hira. People say all evil that occurs is brought about by the wicked. Wicked people say, "I should have been virtuous, but through the faults[140] of others have become evil." Some say, "Why has not five become seven?" Five says, "I would have been seven, but two and five make seven. If the Creator or the Creator's creatures had given me two more, I should have been seven." So thought Hira.
Oh, Hira! Hira! you don’t have a bad face, you’re still young; why do you have this evil in your heart? Why did the Creator let her down? Just because the Creator let her down, does she want to betray others? If Hira were in Surja Mukhi's position, would she be so deceitful? Hira says "No!" But sitting in Hira's position, she talks like Hira. People say all the bad things that happen are caused by the wicked. Wicked people say, "I would have been good, but because of the faults[140] of others, I've become bad." Some ask, "Why hasn’t five become seven?" Five replies, "I could have been seven, but two and five make seven. If the Creator or the Creator's creations had given me two more, I would have been seven." That's what Hira thought.
Hira said to herself: "Now what shall I do? Since the Creator has given me the opportunity, why should I lose it through my own fault? On the one side, if I take Kunda home to the Dattas, Kamal will give me the necklace, and the Grihini also will give me something. Shall I spare the Babu? On the other hand, if I give Kunda to Debendra Babu, I shall get a large sum of money at once. But I can't do that. Why does Debendra think Kunda so beautiful? If I had good food, dressed well, took my ease like a fine lady in a picture, I could be the same. So simple a creature as Kunda can never understand the merits of Debendra Babu. If there were no mud there would be no lotus, and Kunda is the only woman who can excite love in Debendra Babu. Every one to their destiny! But why am I angry?[141] Why should I trouble myself? I used to jest at love—I used to say it is mere talk, a mere story. Now I laugh no longer. I used to say, 'If anyone loves let him love; I shall never love any one.' Fate said, 'Wait, you will see by and by.' In trying to seize the robber of other's wealth, I have lost my own heart. What a face! what a neck! what a figure! is there another man like him? That the fellow should tell me to bring Kunda to him! Could he set no one else this task? I could have struck him in the face! I have come to love him so dearly, I could even find pleasure in striking him. But let that pass. In that path there is danger; I must not think of it. I have long ceased to look for joy or sorrow in this life. Nevertheless, I cannot give Kunda into Debendra's hand; the thought of it torments me. Rather I will so manage that she shall not fall in his way. How shall I effect that? I will place Kunda where she was before, thus she will escape him. Whether he dress as Boisnavi or Vasudeva,[12] he will not obtain admission into that house; therefore it [142]will be well to take Kunda back there. But she will not go! Her face is set against the house. But if all coax her she must go. Another design I have in my mind; will God permit me to carry it out? Why am I so angry with Surja Mukhi? She never did me any harm; on the contrary, she loves me and is kind to me. Why, then, am I angry? Because Surja Mukhi is happy, and I am miserable; she is great, I am mean; she is mistress, I am servant; therefore my anger against her is strong. If, you say, God made her great, how is that her fault? Why should I hurt her? I reply, God has done me harm. Is that my fault? I do not wish to hurt her, but if hurting her benefits me, why should I not do it? Who does not seek his own advantage? Now I want money; I can't endure servitude any longer. Where will money come from? From the Datta house—where else? To get the Datta money, then, must be my object. Every one knows that Nagendra Babu's eyes have fallen on Kunda; the Babu worships her. What great people wish, they can accomplish. The only obstacle is Surja[143] Mukhi. If the two should quarrel, then the great Surja Mukhi's wish will no longer be regarded. Now, let me see if I cannot bring about a quarrel. If that is done, the Babu will be free to worship Kunda. At present Kunda is but an innocent, but I will make her wise; I will soon bring her into subjection. She can be of much assistance to me. If I give my mind to it, I can make her do what I will. If the Babu devotes himself to Kunda, he will do what she bids him; and she shall do what I bid her. So shall I receive the fruits of his devotion. If I am not to serve longer, this is the way it must be brought about. I will give Kunda Nandini to Nagendra, but not suddenly. I will hide her for a few days and see what happens. Love is deepened by separation. If I keep them apart the Babu's love will ripen. Then I will bring out Kunda and give her to him. Then if Surja Mukhi's fate is not broken, it must be a very strong fate. In the meantime I will mould Kunda to my will. But, first, I must send my grandmother to Kamarghat, else I cannot keep Kunda hidden."[144]
Hira thought to herself, "What should I do now? The Creator has given me this chance, so why should I mess it up myself? On one hand, if I take Kunda home to the Dattas, Kamal will give me the necklace, and the Grihini will give me something too. Should I let the Babu go? On the other hand, if I give Kunda to Debendra Babu, I’ll get a big sum of money right away. But I can't do that. Why does Debendra think Kunda is so beautiful? If I had good food, dressed nicely, enjoyed my life like a refined lady in a painting, I could be the same. Kunda, such a simple girl, will never understand what Debendra Babu is like. Without mud, there would be no lotus, and Kunda is the only one who can inspire love in Debendra Babu. Everyone has their own fate! But why am I angry? Why should I stress myself out? I used to joke about love—say it was just talk, a mere story. Now, I don’t laugh anymore. I used to claim, ‘If anyone loves, let them love; I’ll never love anyone.’ Fate said, ‘Just wait, you’ll see soon enough.’ In trying to grab the thief of others’ wealth, I’ve lost my own heart. What a face! What a neck! What a figure! Is there another man like him? That he would ask me to bring Kunda to him! Why couldn’t he ask someone else to do this job? I could have slapped him! I’ve come to love him so much that I even find pleasure in hitting him. But let's drop that. There's danger in that thought; I shouldn't entertain it. I've long stopped looking for joy or sorrow in this life. Still, I can't let Kunda go to Debendra; just thinking about it drives me mad. I’d rather make sure she doesn’t cross his path. How can I do that? I’ll put Kunda back where she was before, then she’ll avoid him. Whether he dresses as Boisnavi or Vasudeva, he won't be able to enter that house; so it’s best to take Kunda back there. But she won’t go! She’s adamant against that house. But if everyone convinces her, she’ll have to go. I have another plan brewing; will God allow me to follow through with it? Why am I so angry with Surja Mukhi? She’s never hurt me; actually, she cares for me and is kind. So why do I feel this way? Because Surja Mukhi is happy while I am miserable; she’s on top, I’m at the bottom; she’s the mistress, I’m the servant; thus, my anger against her grows. If you say God made her important, how is that her fault? Why should I hurt her? I say, God has wronged me. Is that my fault? I don’t want to hurt her, but if harming her helps me, why shouldn’t I? Who doesn’t look out for their own interests? Now I need money; I can’t stand being a servant any longer. Where will the money come from? From the Datta household—where else? So, getting the Datta money must be my goal. Everybody knows Nagendra Babu has taken a liking to Kunda; the Babu adores her. What powerful people desire, they can get. The only hurdle is Surja Mukhi. If the two of them argue, then the great Surja Mukhi’s wishes won’t matter anymore. Now, let me see if I can stir up a quarrel. If that happens, the Babu will be free to pursue Kunda. Right now, Kunda is just innocent, but I’ll make her wise; I’ll soon bring her under control. She can help me a lot. If I focus on it, I can make her do what I want. If the Babu dedicates himself to Kunda, he’ll do her bidding; and she will do what I tell her. That way, I’ll reap the benefits of his devotion. If I’m to stop being a servant, this is how it needs to happen. I’ll give Kunda to Nagendra, but not immediately. I’ll keep her hidden for a few days and see what unfolds. Love deepens with absence. If I keep them apart, the Babu’s love will grow. Then I’ll bring Kunda out and give her to him. If Surja Mukhi’s fate isn't broken, it must be incredibly strong. In the meantime, I’ll shape Kunda to my desires. But first, I need to send my grandma to Kamarghat; otherwise, I can’t keep Kunda hidden."
[12] Vasudeva—the father of Krishna.
__A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__ Vasudeva—Krishna's father.
With this design, Hira set about her arrangements. On some pretext she induced her grandmother to go to the house of a relative in the village of Kamarghat, and kept Kunda closely concealed in her own house. Kunda, seeing all her zeal and care, thought to herself, "There is no one living so good as Hira. Even Kamal does not love me so much."
With this plan, Hira started making her arrangements. Under some pretext, she convinced her grandmother to visit a relative’s house in the village of Kamarghat, and kept Kunda hidden in her own home. Seeing all of Hira's dedication and concern, Kunda thought to herself, "No one in the world is as good as Hira. Even Kamal doesn’t love me this much."


CHAPTER XVII.
HIRA'S QUARREL. THE BUD OF THE POISON TREE.

es, that will do. Kunda shall submit. But if we do not make Surja Mukhi appear as poison in the eyes of Nagendra, nothing can be accomplished."
Yes, that will work. Kunda will comply. But if we don't make Surja Mukhi look toxic in Nagendra's eyes, we won't achieve anything.
So Hira set herself to divide the hearts hitherto undivided.
So Hira focused on splitting the hearts that had never been divided before.
One morning early, the wicked Hira came into her mistress's house ready for work. There was a servant in the Datta household named Kousalya, who hated Hira because she was head servant and enjoyed the favour of the mistress. Hira said to[146] her: "Sister Kushi, I feel very strange to-day; will you do my work for me?"
One early morning, the wicked Hira arrived at her boss's house ready to work. In the Datta household, there was a servant named Kousalya who disliked Hira because she was the head servant and had the mistress's favor. Hira said to[146] her: "Sister Kushi, I'm feeling really strange today; can you do my work for me?"
Kousalya feared Hira, therefore she said: "Of course I will do it; we are all subject to illness, and all the subjects of one mistress."
Kousalya was afraid of Hira, so she said: "Of course I'll do it; we all get sick, and we're all under one ruler."
It had been Hira's wish that Kousalya should give no reply, and she would make that a pretext for a quarrel. So, shaking her head, she said: "You presume so far as to abuse me?"
It was Hira's wish for Kousalya to remain silent, and she planned to use that as an excuse to start a fight. So, shaking her head, she said, "You think you can talk to me like that?"
Astonished, Kousalya said: "When did I abuse any one?"
Astonished, Kousalya said: "When did I insult anyone?"
"What!" said Hira, angrily, "you deny it? Why did you speak of my illness? Do you think I am going to die? You hope that I am ill that you may show people how good you are to me. May you be ill yourself."
"What!" Hira said angrily, "you deny it? Why did you mention my illness? Do you think I'm going to die? You want me to be sick so you can show everyone how kind you are to me. I hope you get sick yourself."
"Be it so! Why are you angry, sister? You must die some day; Death will not forget you, nor will he forget me."
"Fine! Why are you mad, sis? You’re going to die one day; Death won’t forget you, and he won’t forget me either."
"May Death never forget you! You envy me! May you die of envy! May your life be short! Go to destruction! May blindness seize upon you!"[147]
"May Death never forget you! You envy me! May you die from envy! May your life be short! Go to ruin! May blindness take hold of you!"[147]
Kousalya could bear no more. She began to return these good wishes in similar terms. In the act of quarrelling Kousalya was the superior. Therefore Hira got her deserts.
Kousalya could take no more. She started to respond to these good wishes in the same way. In their argument, Kousalya was the stronger one. So Hira got what she deserved.
Then Hira went to complain to her mistress. If any one could have looked at her as she went, they would have seen no signs of anger on her face, but rather a smile on her lips. But when she reached her mistress, her face expressed great anger, and she began by using the weapon given by God to woman—that is to say, she shed a flood of tears.
Then Hira went to talk to her mistress. If anyone had seen her as she walked, they wouldn’t have noticed any signs of anger on her face, just a smile on her lips. But when she got to her mistress, her face showed a lot of anger, and she started by using the tool given by God to women—that is, she cried a river of tears.
Surja Mukhi inquired into the cause. On hearing the complaint, she judged that Hira was in fault. Nevertheless, for her sake, she scolded Kousalya slightly.
Surja Mukhi asked about the reason. After hearing the complaint, she determined that Hira was at fault. However, for her own sake, she lightly scolded Kousalya.
Not being satisfied with that, Hira said: "You must dismiss that woman, or I will not remain."
Not satisfied with that, Hira said: "You need to let her go, or I won't stay."
Then Surja Mukhi was much vexed with Hira, and said: "You are very encroaching, Hira; you began the quarrel, the fault was entirely yours, and now you want me to dismiss the woman. I[148] will do nothing so unjust. Go, if you will. I will not bid you stay."
Then Surja Mukhi was really angry with Hira and said, "You're being very pushy, Hira; you started the argument, the blame is all on you, and now you want me to get rid of the woman. I[148] won't do anything so unfair. Go if you want. I'm not going to ask you to stay."
This was just what Hira wanted. Saying "Very well, I go," her eyes streaming with tears, she presented herself before the Babu in the outer apartments.
This was exactly what Hira wanted. Saying "Alright, I’m going," her eyes filled with tears, she went before the Babu in the outer rooms.
The Babu was alone in the boita khana—he was usually alone now. Seeing Hira weeping, he asked, "Why do you weep, Hira?"
The Babu was alone in the boita khana—he was generally alone now. Seeing Hira crying, he asked, "Why are you crying, Hira?"
"I have been told to come for my wages."
"I've been told to come for my pay."
Nagendra, astonished, asked: "What has happened?"
Nagendra, surprised, asked, "What’s up?"
"I am dismissed. Ma Thakurani (the mistress) has dismissed me."
"I've been let go. Ma Thakurani (the mistress) has let me go."
"What have you done?" asked Nagendra.
"What did you do?" asked Nagendra.
"Kushi abused me; I complained: the mistress believes her account and dismisses me."
"Kushi mistreated me; I reported it: the mistress trusts her version and disregards me."
Nagendra, shaking his head and laughing, said: "That is not a likely story, Hira; tell the truth."
Nagendra, shaking his head and laughing, said: "That's not a believable story, Hira; tell the truth."
Hira then, speaking plainly, said: "The truth is I will not stay."
Hira then, speaking straightforwardly, said: "The fact is I won't stay."
"The mistress has become quite altered. One never knows what to expect from her."
"The mistress has changed a lot. You never know what to expect from her."
Nagendra, frowning, said in a sharp voice: "What does that mean?"
Nagendra, frowning, said sharply, "What does that mean?"
Hira now brought in the fact she had wished to report.
Hira then mentioned the thing she wanted to report.
"What did she not say that day to Kunda Nandini Thakurani? On hearing it, Kunda left the house. Our fear is that some day something of the same kind should be said to us. We could not endure that, therefore I chose to anticipate it."
"What didn’t she say that day to Kunda Nandini Thakurani? When she heard it, Kunda left the house. Our fear is that one day something similar could be said to us. We wouldn't be able to handle that, so I decided to face it head-on."
"What are you talking about?" asked Nagendra.
"What are you talking about?" Nagendra asked.
"I cannot tell you for shame."
"I can't tell you, it's too embarrassing."
Nagendra's brow became dark. He said: "Go home for to-day; I will call you to-morrow."
Nagendra frowned. He said, "Go home for today; I'll call you tomorrow."
Hira's desire was accomplished. With this design she had quarrelled with Kousalya.
Hira's wish was fulfilled. With this plan, she had argued with Kousalya.
Nagendra rose and went to Surja Mukhi. Stepping lightly, Hira followed him.
Nagendra got up and walked over to Surja Mukhi. Hira followed him quietly.
Taking Surja Mukhi aside, he asked, "Have you dismissed Hira?"[150]
Taking Surja Mukhi aside, he asked, "Did you let Hira go?"[150]
Surja Mukhi replied, "Yes," and then related the particulars.
Surja Mukhi said, "Yes," and then shared the details.
On hearing them, Nagendra said: "Let her go. What did you say to Kunda Nandini?"
On hearing them, Nagendra said: "Let her go. What did you say to Kunda Nandini?"
Nagendra saw that Surja Mukhi turned pale.
Nagendra noticed that Surja Mukhi went pale.
"What did I say to her?" she stammered.
"What did I say to her?" she stuttered.
"Yes; what evil words did you use to her?"
"Yes; what terrible things did you say to her?"
Surja Mukhi remained silent some moments. Then she said—
Surja Mukhi stayed quiet for a moment. Then she said—
"You are my all, my present and my future; why should I hide anything from you? I did speak harshly to Kunda; then, fearing you would be angry, I said nothing to you about it. Forgive me that offence; I am telling you all."
"You are everything to me, my present and my future; why should I keep anything from you? I spoke harshly to Kunda; then, worried you would get upset, I didn’t mention it to you. Please forgive that mistake; I’m being honest with you now."
Then she related the whole matter frankly, from the discovery of the Boisnavi Haridasi to the reproof she had given to Kunda. At the end she said—
Then she told the whole story honestly, from finding the Boisnavi Haridasi to the scolding she had given Kunda. At the end, she said—
"I am deeply sorrowful that I have driven Kunda Nandini away. I have sent everywhere in search of her. If I had found her, I would have brought her back."
"I am really upset that I drove Kunda Nandini away. I've searched everywhere for her. If I had found her, I would have brought her back."
Nagendra said[151]—
Nagendra said
"Your fault is not great. Could any respectable man's wife, hearing of such a stain, give refuge to the guilty person? But would it not have been well to think a little whether the charge was true? Did you not know of the talk about Tara Charan's house? Had you not heard that Debendra had been introduced to Kunda three years before? Why did you believe a drunkard's words?"
"Your mistake isn't that serious. Would any decent man's wife, upon hearing such a scandal, give shelter to the wrongdoer? But wouldn’t it have been better to consider a bit whether the accusation was true? Didn’t you hear the gossip about Tara Charan’s place? Hadn't you heard that Debendra was introduced to Kunda three years ago? Why did you trust a drunkard's claims?"
"I did not think of that at the time. Now I do. My mind was wandering." As she spoke the faithful wife sank at Nagendra's feet, and clasping them with her hands, wetted them with her tears. Then raising her face, she said: "Oh, dearer than life, I will conceal nothing that is in my mind."
"I didn't think about that back then. Now I do. I was distracted." As she spoke, the devoted wife knelt at Nagendra's feet, gripping them with her hands, soaking them with her tears. Then, lifting her face, she said: "Oh, more precious than life, I won't hide anything from you."
Nagendra said: "You need not speak; I know that you suspect me of feeling love for Kunda Nandini."
Nagendra said, "You don’t have to say anything; I know you think I have feelings for Kunda Nandini."
Surja Mukhi, hiding her face at the feet of her husband, wept. Again raising her face, sad and tearful as the dew-drenched lily, and looking into the face of him who could remove all her sorrows,[152] she said: "What can I say? Can I tell you what I have suffered? Only lest my death might increase your sorrow, I do not die. Otherwise, when I knew that another shared your heart, I wished to die. But people cannot die by wishing to do so."
Surja Mukhi, hiding her face at her husband’s feet, cried. Once again lifting her face, sad and tear-filled like a dew-soaked lily, and gazing into the eyes of the one who could ease all her pain,[152] she said: "What can I say? Can I express what I’ve gone through? If it weren’t for the thought that my death might only add to your sorrow, I would have already died. But you can’t just die by wanting to."
Nagendra remained long silent; then, with a heavy sigh, he said—
Nagendra stayed quiet for a while; then, with a deep sigh, he said—
"Surja Mukhi, the fault is entirely mine, not yours at all. I have indeed been unfaithful to you; in truth, forgetting you, my heart has gone out towards Kunda Nandini. What I have suffered, what I do suffer, how can I tell you? You think I have not tried to conquer it; but you must not think so. You could never reproach me so bitterly as I have reproached myself. I am sinful; I cannot rule my own heart."
"Surja Mukhi, the fault is completely mine, not yours at all. I have indeed been unfaithful to you; truthfully, I’ve forgotten you and my heart has turned towards Kunda Nandini. What I’ve endured, what I’m going through, how can I explain it to you? You might think I haven’t tried to overcome it, but that’s not true. You could never blame me as harshly as I’ve blamed myself. I'm guilty; I can't control my own heart."
Surja Mukhi could endure no more. With clasped hands, she entreated bitterly—
Surja Mukhi could take no more. With her hands clasped, she pleaded desperately—
"Tell me no more; keep it to yourself. Every word you say pierces my breast like a dart. What was written in my destiny has befallen me. I wish to hear no more; it is not fit for me to hear."[153]
"Stop talking; just keep it to yourself. Every word you say hits me like a dart. What was meant to happen to me has happened. I don't want to hear any more; it's not right for me to listen."[153]
"Not so, Surja Mukhi," replied Nagendra; "you must listen. Let me speak what I have long striven to say. I will leave this house; I will not die, but I will go elsewhere. Home and family no longer give me happiness. I have no pleasure with you. I am not fit to be your husband. I will trouble you no longer. I will find Kunda Nandini, and will go with her to another place. Do you remain mistress of this house. Regard yourself as a widow—since your husband is so base, are you not a widow? But, base as I am, I will not deceive you. Now I go: if I am able to forget Kunda, I will come again; if not, this is my last hour with you."
"Not true, Surja Mukhi," Nagendra replied; "you need to listen. Let me speak what I've been trying to say for a long time. I'm going to leave this house; I won't die, but I'll go somewhere else. Home and family no longer bring me joy. I find no happiness with you. I'm not worthy of being your husband. I won't trouble you anymore. I'll find Kunda Nandini and go with her to another place. You can stay as the mistress of this house. Think of yourself as a widow—since your husband is so unworthy, aren't you a widow? But, unworthy as I am, I won't deceive you. Now I'm leaving: if I can forget Kunda, I'll come back; if not, this is our last moment together."
What could Surja Mukhi say to these heart-piercing words? For some moments she stood like a statue, gazing on the ground. Then she cast herself down, hid her face, and wept.
What could Surja Mukhi say to these heart-wrenching words? For a moment, she stood like a statue, staring at the ground. Then she threw herself down, covered her face, and cried.
As the murderous tiger gazes at the dying agonies of his prey, Nagendra stood calmly looking on. He was thinking, "She will die to-day or to-morrow, as God may will. What can I do? If I willed it, could I die instead of her? I might die; but would that save Surja Mukhi?"[154]
As the deadly tiger watches the suffering of its prey, Nagendra stood there, calm and observing. He thought, "She will die today or tomorrow, depending on what God decides. What can I do? If I wanted to, could I die instead of her? I might die, but would that save Surja Mukhi?"[154]
No, Nagendra, your dying would not save Surja Mukhi; but it would be well for you to die.
No, Nagendra, dying wouldn’t save Surja Mukhi; but it would be better for you to die.
After a time Surja Mukhi sat up; again clasping her husband's feet, she said: "Grant me one boon."
After a while, Surja Mukhi sat up; once more holding her husband’s feet, she said: "Please grant me one wish."
"What is it?"
"What's up?"
"Remain one month longer at home. If in that time we do not find Kunda Nandini, then go; I will not keep you."
"Stay at home for another month. If we don't find Kunda Nandini by then, you can go; I won't stop you."
Nagendra went out without reply. Mentally he consented to remain for a month; Surja Mukhi understood that. She stood looking after his departing figure, thinking within herself: "My darling, I would give my life to extract the thorns from your feet. You would leave your home on account of this wretched Surja Mukhi. Are you or I the greater?"
Nagendra walked out without saying a word. In his mind, he agreed to stay for a month; Surja Mukhi got that. She watched his vanishing figure, thinking to herself, "My dear, I would gladly give my life to take the thorns from your feet. You would leave your home because of this miserable Surja Mukhi. Who’s more important, you or me?"


CHAPTER XVIII.
THE CAGED BIRD.

ira had lost her place, but her relation with the Datta family was not ended. Ever greedy for news from that house, whenever she met any one belonging to it Hira entered into a gossip. In this way she endeavoured to ascertain the disposition of Nagendra towards Surja Mukhi. If she met no one she found some pretext for going to the house, where, in the servants' quarters, while talking of all sorts of matters, she would learn what she wished and depart. Thus some time passed; but one day an unpleasant event[156] occurred. After Hira's interview with Debendra, Malati the milk-woman became a constant visitor at Hira's dwelling. Malati perceived that Hira was not pleased at this; also that one room remained constantly closed. The door was secured by a chain and padlock on the outside; but Malati coming in unexpectedly, perceived that the padlock was absent. Malati removed the chain and pushed the door, but it was fastened inside, and she guessed that some one must be in the room. She asked herself who it could be? At first she thought of a lover; but then, whose lover? Malati knew everything that went on, so she dismissed this idea. Then the thought flashed across her that it might be Kunda, of whose expulsion from the house of Nagendra she had heard. She speedily determined upon a means of resolving her doubt.
Hira had lost her place, but her connection with the Datta family wasn't over. Always eager for news from that household, whenever she ran into anyone from it, Hira would dive into gossip. This way, she tried to find out how Nagendra felt about Surja Mukhi. If she didn't meet anyone, she would come up with an excuse to visit the house, where, while chatting about all sorts of things in the servants' quarters, she would get the information she wanted and leave. Some time passed like this; then one day, something uncomfortable happened. After Hira's meeting with Debendra, Malati, the milk-woman, became a regular visitor to Hira's home. Malati noticed that Hira was not happy about this and that one room remained locked at all times. The door was secured with a chain and padlock from the outside; however, when Malati came in unexpectedly, she saw that the padlock was missing. Malati took off the chain and pushed the door, but it was locked from the inside, making her suspect that someone was inside. She wondered who it could be. At first, she thought it might be a lover, but which lover? Since Malati was aware of everything that happened, she dismissed that idea. Then a thought struck her that it could be Kunda, whose banishment from Nagendra's home she had heard about. She quickly came up with a plan to figure out what was going on.
Hira had brought from Nagendra's house a young deer, which, because of its restlessness, she kept tied up. Malati, pretending to feed the creature, loosened the fastening, and it instantly bounded away. Hira ran after it.[157]
Hira had brought a young deer from Nagendra's house, which she kept tied up because it was so restless. Malati, pretending to feed the animal, untied it, and it immediately jumped away. Hira ran after it.[157]
Seizing the opportunity of Hira's absence, Malati began to call out in a voice of distress: "Hira! Hira! What has happened to my Hira?" Then rapping at Kunda's door, she exclaimed: "Kunda Thakurun, come out quickly; something has happened to Hira!"
Seizing the chance while Hira was away, Malati started to shout in a worried tone: "Hira! Hira! What happened to my Hira?" Then, knocking on Kunda's door, she shouted: "Kunda Thakurun, come out quickly; something's wrong with Hira!"
In alarm Kunda opened the door; whereupon Malati, with a laugh of triumph, ran away. Kunda again shut herself in. She did not say anything of the circumstance to Hira, lest she should be scolded.
In panic, Kunda opened the door, and Malati, laughing in triumph, ran away. Kunda shut herself in again. She didn’t mention the situation to Hira, afraid of being scolded.
Malati went with her news to Debendra, who resolved to visit Hira's house on the following day, and bring the matter to a conclusion.
Malati took her news to Debendra, who decided to visit Hira's house the next day to wrap things up.
Kunda was now a caged bird, ever restless. Two currents uniting become a powerful stream. So it was in Kunda's heart. On one side shame, insult, expulsion by Surja Mukhi; on the other, passion for Nagendra. By the union of these two streams that of passion was increased, the smaller was swallowed up in the larger. The pain of the taunts and the insults began to fade; Surja Mukhi no longer found place in Kunda's mind, Nagendra[158] occupied it entirely. She began to think, "Why was I so hasty in leaving the house? What harm did a few words do to me? I used to see Nagendra, now I never see him. Could I go back there? if she would not drive me away I would go." Day and night Kunda revolved these thoughts; she soon determined that she must return to the Datta house or she would die; that even if Surja Mukhi should again drive her away, she must make the attempt. Yet on what pretext could she present herself in the court-yard of the house? She would be ashamed to go thither alone. If Hira would accompany her she might venture; but she was ashamed to open her mouth to Hira.
Kunda was now a restless caged bird. Two currents coming together create a powerful stream. That was how it felt in Kunda's heart. On one side was shame and insult from Surja Mukhi; on the other was her passion for Nagendra. The combination of these two feelings only intensified her passion, with the smaller feeling being consumed by the larger. The hurt from the taunts and insults started to fade; Surja Mukhi no longer occupied Kunda's thoughts, as Nagendra completely filled her mind. She began to think, "Why was I so quick to leave the house? What harm did a few words really do to me? I used to see Nagendra, but now I never do. Could I go back? If she wouldn’t kick me out again, I would go." Day and night, Kunda turned these thoughts over in her mind; she quickly decided that she had to return to the Datta house or she would die; even if Surja Mukhi kicked her out again, she had to try. But how could she show up in the courtyard of the house? She would be embarrassed to go there alone. If Hira would go with her, she might take the chance; but she was too shy to speak up to Hira.
Her heart could no longer endure not to see its lord. One morning, about four o'clock, while Hira was still sleeping, Kunda Nandini arose, and opening the door noiselessly, stepped out of the house. The dark fortnight being ended, the slender moon floated in the sky like a beautiful maiden on the ocean. Darkness lurked in masses amid the trees. The air was so still that the[159] lotus in the weed-covered pool bordering the road did not shed its seed; the dogs were sleeping by the wayside; nature was full of sweet pensiveness. Kunda, guessing the road, went with doubtful steps to the front of the Datta house; she had no design in going, except that she might by a happy chance see Nagendra. Her return to his house might come about; let it occur when it would, what harm was there in the meantime in trying to see him secretly? While she remained shut up in Hira's house she had no chance of doing so. Now, as she walked, she thought, "I will go round the house; I may see him at the window, in the palace, in the garden, or in the path." Nagendra was accustomed to rise early; it was possible Kunda might obtain a glimpse of him, after which she meant to return to Hira's dwelling. But when she arrived at the house she saw nothing of Nagendra, neither in the path, nor on the roof, nor at the window. Kunda thought, "He has not risen yet, it is not time; I will sit down." She sat waiting amid the darkness under the trees; a fruit or a twig might be heard, in the silence,[160] loosening itself with a slight cracking sound and falling to the earth. The birds in the boughs shook their wings overhead, and occasionally the sound of the watchmen knocking at the doors and giving their warning cry was to be heard. At length the cool wind blew, forerunner of the dawn, and the papiya (a bird) filled the air with its musical voice. Presently the cuckoo uttered his cry, and at length all the birds uniting raised a chorus of song. Then Kunda's hope was extinguished; she could no longer sit under the trees, for the dawn had come and she might be seen by any one. She rose to return. One hope had been strong in her mind. There was a flower-garden attached to the inner apartments, where sometimes Nagendra took the air. He might be walking there now; Kunda could not go away without seeing if it were so. But the garden was walled in, and unless the inner door was open there was no entrance. Going thither, Kunda found the door open, and, stepping boldly in, hid herself within the boughs of a bakul tree growing in the midst. Thickly-planted rows of creeper[161]-covered trees decked the garden, between which were fine stone-made paths, and here and there flowering shrubs of various hues—red, white, blue, and yellow. Above them hovered troops of insects, coveting the morning honey, now poising, now flying, humming as they went; and, following the example of man, settling in flocks on some specially attractive flower. Many-coloured birds of small size, flower-like themselves, hovered over the blossoms, sipping the sweet juices and pouring forth a flood of melody. The flower-weighted branches swayed in the gentle breeze, the flowerless boughs remaining still, having nothing to weigh them down. The cuckoo, proud bird, concealing his dark colour in the tufts of the bakul tree, triumphed over every one with his song.
Her heart couldn’t take not seeing her love any longer. One morning, around four o'clock, while Hira was still sleeping, Kunda Nandini got up, quietly opened the door, and stepped outside. The dark phase of the moon was over, and the delicate moon glowed in the sky like a beautiful girl on the ocean. Shadows loomed in the trees. The air was so calm that the lotus in the weedy pool by the road didn’t drop its seeds; the dogs were sleeping by the side of the road, and nature felt sweetly thoughtful. Kunda, guessing the way, walked uncertainly to the front of the Datta house; she had no real plan except that she might get lucky and see Nagendra. If a chance to go back to his house presented itself, so be it; what was the harm in trying to see him secretly in the meantime? While she was stuck in Hira’s house, she had no shot at it. As she moved along, she thought, "I’ll walk around the house; I might see him at the window, in the palace, in the garden, or on the path." Nagendra usually got up early; it was possible Kunda might catch a glimpse of him, and then she planned to return to Hira's place. But when she reached the house, she saw no sign of Nagendra—neither on the path, nor on the roof, nor at the window. Kunda thought, "He hasn’t gotten up yet; it’s too early; I’ll sit down." She waited in the darkness under the trees; occasionally, a fruit or a twig could be heard falling to the ground with a faint crack. Birds in the branches rustled their wings overhead, and now and then, the night watchmen could be heard knocking on doors and calling out their warnings. Finally, a cool breeze blew in, signaling dawn, and the papiya (a bird) filled the air with its song. Soon, the cuckoo called out, and eventually, all the birds joined in a chorus of music. Then Kunda’s hope faded; she could no longer stay under the trees, as day had arrived, and anyone could see her. She stood up to leave. One hope still lingered in her mind. There was a flower garden connected to the inner apartments where Nagendra sometimes took a walk. He might be there now; Kunda couldn’t leave without checking. But the garden was walled, and unless the inner door was open, she couldn’t get in. When she reached it, Kunda found the door ajar, and stepping in boldly, she hid among the branches of a bakul tree in the middle. Rows of creeping, flowering plants filled the garden, alongside beautiful stone paths and vibrant shrubs—red, white, blue, and yellow. Above, swarms of insects buzzed, drawn to the morning nectar, hovering and darting, humming as they went; following man’s example, they settled in flocks on the most appealing flowers. Colorful, small birds flitted over the blossoms, sipping the sweet nectar and filling the air with their melodies. The weight of the flowers made the branches sway in the gentle breeze, while the bare branches remained still, having nothing to weigh them down. The proud cuckoo, hiding his dark feathers among the bakul tree's leaves, triumphed over all with his song.
In the middle of the garden stood a creeper-covered arbour of white stone, surrounded by flowering shrubs. Kunda Nandini, looking forth from the bakul tree, saw not Nagendra's tall and god-like form. She saw some one lying on the floor of the arbour, and concluded that it was he. She went forward to obtain a better new. Un[162]fortunately the person arose and came out, and poor Kunda saw that it was not Nagendra, but Surja Mukhi. Frightened, Kunda stood still, she could neither advance nor recede. She saw that Surja Mukhi was walking about gathering flowers. Gradually Nagendra's wife approaching the bakul tree, saw some one lurking within its branches. Not recognizing Kunda, Surja Mukhi said, "Who are you?"
In the middle of the garden stood a creeper-covered arbor made of white stone, surrounded by flowering shrubs. Kunda Nandini, peering out from the bakul tree, didn’t see Nagendra’s tall, god-like figure. Instead, she saw someone lying on the floor of the arbor and assumed it was him. She moved closer for a better look. Unfortunately, the person got up and walked out, and poor Kunda realized it wasn’t Nagendra, but Surja Mukhi. Startled, Kunda froze; she could neither move closer nor pull back. She watched as Surja Mukhi walked around, picking flowers. Gradually, Nagendra’s wife approached the bakul tree and noticed someone hiding in its branches. Not recognizing Kunda, Surja Mukhi asked, "Who are you?"
Kunda could not speak for fear; her feet refused to move.
Kunda couldn't speak because she was scared; her feet wouldn't budge.
At length Surja Mukhi saw who it was, and exclaimed, "Is it not Kunda?"
At last, Surja Mukhi recognized who it was and exclaimed, "Is that Kunda?"
Kunda could not answer; but Surja Mukhi, seizing her hand, said, "Come, sister, I will not say anything more to you!" and took her indoors.
Kunda couldn't respond; but Surja Mukhi, grabbing her hand, said, "Come on, sister, I won't say anything else to you!" and led her inside.


CHAPTER XIX.
DESCENT.

n the night of that day, Debendra Datta, alone, in disguise, excited by wine, went to Hira's house in search of Kunda Nandini. He looked in the two huts, but Kunda was not there. Hira, covering her face with her sari, laughed at his discomfiture. Annoyed, Debendra said, "Why do you laugh?"
On the night of that day, Debendra Datta, alone and disguised, fueled by wine, went to Hira's house looking for Kunda Nandini. He checked the two huts, but Kunda wasn't there. Hira, hiding her face with her sari, laughed at his confusion. Annoyed, Debendra said, "Why are you laughing?"
"At your disappointment. The bird has fled; should you search my premises you will not find it."
"Sorry to disappoint you. The bird has flown away; if you search my place, you won't find it."
Then, in reply to Debendra's questions, Hira[164] told all she knew, concluding with the words, "When I missed her in the morning I sought her everywhere, and at last found her in the Babu's house receiving much kindness."
Then, in response to Debendra's questions, Hira[164] shared everything she knew, finishing with, "When I didn't see her in the morning, I looked for her everywhere, and finally found her at the Babu's house being treated very kindly."
Debendra's hopes thus destroyed, he had nothing to detain him; but the doubt in his mind was not dispelled, he wished to sit a little and obtain further information. Noting a cloud or two in the sky he moved restlessly, saying, "I think it is going to rain."
Debendra's hopes now shattered, he had nothing to keep him there; however, the doubt in his mind remained unresolved, and he wanted to sit for a bit and gather more information. Noticing a couple of clouds in the sky, he shifted anxiously, saying, "I think it's going to rain."
It was Hira's wish that he should sit awhile; but she was a woman, living alone; it was night, she could not bid him stay, if she did she would be taking another step in the downward course. Yet that was in her destiny.
It was Hira's wish for him to sit for a while; but she was a woman living alone, it was night, and she couldn’t ask him to stay. If she did, she would be taking another step down a troubling path. But that was part of her fate.
Debendra said, "Have you an umbrella?" There was no such thing in Hira's house. Then he asked, "Will it cause remark if I sit here until the rain is past?"
Debendra asked, "Do you have an umbrella?" There was none in Hira's house. Then he inquired, "Will it be a problem if I sit here until the rain stops?"
"People will remark upon it, certainly; but the mischief has been done already in your coming to my house at night."
"People will definitely talk about it; but the damage is already done by you coming to my house at night."
Hira did not answer, but made a comfortable seat for him on the bench, took a silver-mounted huka from a chest, prepared it for use and handed it to him.
Hira didn’t reply but arranged a comfortable spot for him on the bench, took a silver-mounted huka from a chest, set it up for him, and handed it over.
Debendra drew a flask of brandy from his pocket, and drank some of it undiluted. Under the influence of this spirit he perceived that Hira's eyes were beautiful. In truth they were so—large, dark, brilliant, and seductive. He said, "Your eyes are heavenly!" Hira smiled. Debendra saw in a corner a broken violin. Humming a tune, he took the violin and touched it with the bow. "Where did you get this instrument?" he asked.
Debendra pulled a flask of brandy from his pocket and took a swig of it straight. Feeling the effects of the drink, he noticed that Hira's eyes were stunning. They really were—big, dark, bright, and captivating. He said, "Your eyes are like they’re from heaven!" Hira smiled. Debendra spotted a broken violin in the corner. Humming a melody, he picked up the violin and drew the bow across the strings. "Where did you find this instrument?" he asked.
"I bought it of a beggar."
"I bought it from a beggar."
Debendra made it perform a sort of accompaniment to his voice, as he sang some song in accordance with his mood.
Debendra had it play a sort of background melody to his voice as he sang a song that matched his mood.
Hira's eyes shone yet more brilliantly. For a few moments she forgot self, forgot Debendra's position and her own. She thought, "He is the husband, I am the wife; the Creator, making us for each other, designed long ago to bring us[166] together, that we might both enjoy happiness." The thoughts of the infatuated Hira found expression in speech. Debendra discovered from her half-spoken words that she had given her heart to him. The words were hardly uttered when Hira recovered consciousness. Then, with the wild look of a frantic creature, she exclaimed, "Go from my house!"
Hira's eyes sparkled even more. For a moment, she forgot about herself, forgot about Debendra's status and her own. She thought, "He is the husband, I am the wife; the Creator, who made us for each other, designed long ago to bring us[166] together, so we could both find happiness." The passionate thoughts of Hira spilled out in her words. Debendra realized from her half-finished sentences that she had given her heart to him. Hardly had the words left her mouth when Hira snapped back to reality. Then, with a wild look of a frantic being, she shouted, "Get out of my house!"
Astonished, Debendra said, "What is the matter, Hira?"
Astonished, Debendra said, "What's going on, Hira?"
"You must go at once, or I shall."
"You need to go right now, or I will."
"Why do you drive me away?" said Debendra.
"Why are you pushing me away?" Debendra asked.
"Go, go, else I will call some one. Why should you destroy me?"
"Go on, or I will call someone. Why are you trying to ruin me?"
"Is this woman's nature?" asked Debendra.
"Is this how she is?" asked Debendra.
Hira, enraged, answered: "The nature of woman is not evil. The nature of such a man as you is very evil. You have no religion, you care nothing for the fate of others; you go about seeking only your own delight, thinking only what woman you can destroy. Otherwise, why are you sitting in my house? Was it not your design to compass my destruction? You thought me to be[167] a courtezan, else you would not have had the boldness to sit down here. But I am not a courtezan; I am a poor woman, and live by my labour. I have no leisure for such evil doings. If I had been a rich man's wife, I can't say how it would have been."
Hira, furious, replied: "Women aren't inherently evil. The kind of man you are is truly wicked. You have no morals, you don’t care about others; you only seek your own pleasure, focused solely on which woman you can ruin. Otherwise, why are you in my home? Wasn't it your plan to bring about my downfall? You must have thought I was[167] a prostitute, or you wouldn't have had the nerve to sit here. But I’m not a prostitute; I'm a poor woman and I earn my living through hard work. I don’t have time for such vile behavior. If I had been the wife of a wealthy man, I can't say how things would have turned out."
Debendra frowned.
Debendra was not happy.
Then Hira softened; she looked full at Debendra and said: "The sight of your beauty and your gifts has made me foolish, but you are not to think of me as a courtezan. The sight of you makes me happy, and on that account I wished you to stay. I could not forbid you; but I am a woman. If I were too weak to forbid you, ought you to have sat down? You are very wicked; you entered my house in order to destroy me. Now leave the place!"
Then Hira softened; she looked directly at Debendra and said: "Your beauty and your talents have made me lose my senses, but don't think of me as a courtesan. Seeing you brings me joy, and that’s why I wanted you to stay. I couldn’t tell you to leave; but I am a woman. If I was too weak to send you away, should you have just made yourself comfortable? You’re very cruel; you came into my house to ruin me. Now get out!"
Debendra, taking another draught of brandy, said: "Well done, Hira! you have made a capital speech. Will you give a lecture in our Brahmo Samaj?"
Debendra, taking another sip of brandy, said: "Well done, Hira! You gave a great speech. Will you give a lecture in our Brahmo Samaj?"
Stung to the quick by this mockery, Hira said, bitterly: "I am not to be made a jest of by you.[168] Even if I loved so base a man as you, such love would be no fit subject for a jest. I am not virtuous; I don't understand virtue; my mind is not turned in that direction. The reason I told you I was not a courtezan is because I am resolved not to bring a stain upon my character in the hope of winning your love. If you had a spark of love for me, I would have made no such pledge to myself. I am not speaking of virtue; I should think nothing of infamy compared with the treasure of your love; but you do not love me. For what reward should I incur ill-fame? For what gain should I give up my independence? If a young woman falls into your hands, you will not let her go. If I were to give you my worship, you would accept it; but to-morrow you would forget me, or, if you remembered, it would be to jest over my words with your companions. Why, then, should I become subject to you? Should the day come when you can love me, I will be your devoted servant."
Stung by this mockery, Hira said bitterly, "I won’t be made a joke by you.[168] Even if I loved someone as low as you, that love wouldn’t be something to laugh about. I’m not virtuous; I don’t understand virtue; I’m just not wired that way. The reason I told you I’m not a courtesan is that I refuse to tarnish my reputation just to try to win your love. If you truly cared for me, I wouldn't have to make that promise to myself. I’m not even talking about virtue; I wouldn’t care about being infamous if I could have your love, but you don’t love me. Why would I risk my reputation for no reward? Why should I give up my independence? If a young woman gets involved with you, you won’t let her go. If I were to give you my devotion, you’d take it, but by tomorrow you’d forget about me, or if you did remember, it would just be to laugh about what I said with your friends. So why should I let myself be under your control? If there ever comes a time when you can love me, I’ll be your loyal servant."
In this manner Debendra discovered Hira's affection for himself. He thought: "Now I know[169] you, I can make you dance to my measure, and whenever I please effect my designs through you."
In this way, Debendra realized that Hira had feelings for him. He thought, "Now that I understand you, I can control your actions and make you fulfill my plans whenever I want."
With these thoughts in his mind, he departed. But Debendra did not yet know Hira.
With these thoughts in his mind, he left. But Debendra still didn't know Hira.


CHAPTER XX.
GOOD NEWS.

t is mid-day. Srish Babu is at office. The people in his house are all taking the noon siesta after their meal. The boita khana is locked. A mongrel terrier is sleeping on the door-mat outside, his head between his paws. A couple of servants are seizing the opportunity to chat together in whispers.
It’s midday. Srish Babu is at the office. Everyone in his house is taking a midday nap after their meal. The boita khana is locked. A mongrel terrier is sleeping on the doormat outside, his head resting between his paws. A couple of servants are taking the chance to chat quietly together.
Kamal Mani is sitting in her sleeping chamber at her ease, needle in hand, sewing at some canvas work, her hair all loose; no one about but Satish Babu, indulging in many noises.[172] Satish Babu at first tried to snatch away his mother's wool; but finding it securely guarded, he gave his mind to sucking the head of a clay tiger. In the distance a cat with outstretched paws sits watching them both. Her disposition was grave, her face indicated much wisdom and a heart void of fickleness. She is thinking: "The condition of human creatures is frightful; their minds are ever given to sewing canvas, playing with dolls, or some such silly employment. Their thoughts are not turned to good works, nor to providing suitable food for cats. What will become of them hereafter?" Elsewhere, a lizard on the wall with upraised face is watching a fly. No doubt he is pondering the evil disposition of flies. A butterfly is flying about. In the spot where Satish Babu sits eating sweets, the flies collect in swarms; the ants also do their share towards removing the sweet food. In a few moments the lizard, not being able to catch the fly, moves elsewhere. The cat also, seeing no means by which she could improve the disposition of mankind, heaving a sigh, slowly departs. The[173] butterfly wings its way out of the room. Kamal Mani, tired of her work, puts it down, and turns to talk with Satish Babu.
Kamal Mani is sitting comfortably in her bedroom, needle in hand, working on some canvas art, her hair flowing loosely. The only company she has is Satish Babu, who is making a lot of noise. At first, Satish Babu tried to grab his mother’s wool, but when he saw it was well protected, he focused on sucking the head of a clay tiger. In the distance, a cat sits with its paws stretched out, watching them both. It has a serious demeanor, its face showing a lot of wisdom and a heart that isn’t fickle. It thinks: "The state of human beings is terrible; they spend their time sewing canvas, playing with dolls, or doing other silly things. They don’t think about doing good deeds or providing proper food for cats. What will happen to them in the future?" Elsewhere, a lizard on the wall is staring at a fly. It’s likely contemplating the wicked nature of flies. A butterfly flits around. In the spot where Satish Babu is eating sweets, flies gather in swarms, and the ants also help themselves to the leftover treats. After a moment, the lizard, unable to catch the fly, moves on. The cat, seeing no way to improve humanity, lets out a sigh and slowly leaves. The butterfly makes its way out of the room. Tired of her work, Kamal Mani sets it down and turns to chat with Satish Babu.
"Oh, Satu Babu, can you tell me why men go to office?"
"Oh, Satu Babu, can you explain to me why men go to work?"
"Sli—li—bli," was the child's only answer.
"Sli—li—bli," was the child's only response.
"Satu Babu," said his mother, "mind you never go to office."
"Satu Babu," his mother said, "make sure you never go to the office."
"Hama," said Satu.
"Hama," Satu said.
"What do you mean by Hama? You must not go to office to do hama. Do not go at all. If you do, the Bou will sit crying at home before the day is half done."
"What do you mean by Hama? You should not go to the office to do hama. Don’t go at all. If you do, the Bou will be sitting at home crying before the day is half over."
Satish Babu understood the word Bou, because Kamal Mani kept him in order by saying that the Bou would come and beat him; so he said, "Bou will beat."
Satish Babu understood the word Bou, because Kamal Mani kept him in line by saying that the Bou would come and get him; so he said, "Bou will beat."
"Remember that, then; if you go to office, the Bou will beat you."
"Keep that in mind; if you go to the office, the Bou will hit you."
How long this sort of conversation would have continued does not appear, for at that moment a maid-servant entered, rubbing her sleepy eyes, and gave a letter to Kamal Mani. Kamal saw it was[174] from Surja Mukhi; she read it twice through, then sat silent and dejected. This was the letter:
How long this kind of conversation might have gone on is unclear, because just then, a maid walked in, rubbing her sleepy eyes, and handed a letter to Kamal Mani. Kamal noticed it was[174] from Surja Mukhi; she read it twice, then sat quietly and downcast. This was the letter:
"Dearest,—Since you returned to Calcutta you have forgotten me; else why have I had only one letter from you? Do you not know that I always long for news of you? You ask for news of Kunda. You will be delighted to hear that she is found. Besides that, I have another piece of good news for you. My husband is about to be married to Kunda. I have arranged this marriage. Widow-marriage is allowed in the Shastras, so what fault can be found with it? The wedding will take place in a couple of days; but you will not be able to attend, otherwise I would have invited you. Come, if you can, in time for the ceremony of Phul Saja.[13] I have a great desire to see you."
"Dear, — Since you got back to Calcutta, you seem to have forgotten me; otherwise, why would I have received only one letter from you? Don’t you realize that I’m always eager for news about you? You’re asking about Kunda. You’ll be happy to hear that she’s been found. I have another piece of good news for you: my husband is going to marry Kunda. I made this arrangement. Widow remarriage is permitted in the Shastras, so what’s wrong with it? The wedding will happen in a couple of days, but you won’t be able to join us; otherwise, I would have invited you. Please come if you can make it in time for the ceremony of Phul Saja.[13] I really want to see you."
Kamal could not understand the meaning of this letter. She proceeded to take counsel with Satish Babu, who sat in front of her nibbling at [175]the corners of a book. Kamal read the letter to him and said—
Kamal couldn’t figure out what this letter meant. She decided to talk to Satish Babu, who was sitting in front of her, nibbling on the corners of a book. Kamal read the letter to him and said—
"Now, Satish Babu, tell me the meaning of this."
"Now, Satish Babu, explain what this means."
Satish understood the joke; he stood up ready to cover his mother with kisses.
Satish got the joke; he stood up, ready to shower his mother with kisses.
Then for some moments Kamal forgot Surja Mukhi; but presently she returned to the letter, reflecting—
Then for a moment, Kamal forgot about Surja Mukhi; but soon she went back to the letter, thinking—
"This work is beyond Satish Babu, it needs the help of my minister; will he never come in? Come, baby, we are very angry."
"This task is too much for Satish Babu; it needs my minister's assistance. Will he ever show up? Come on, we’re really upset."
In due time Srish Chandra returned from office and changed his dress. Kamal Mani attended to his wants and then threw herself on the couch in a fume, the baby by her side. Srish Chandra, seeing the state of things, smiled, and seated himself, with his huka, on a distant couch. Invoking the huka as a witness he said—
In due time, Srish Chandra came home from work and changed his clothes. Kamal Mani took care of his needs and then flopped onto the couch in a huff, the baby beside her. Srish Chandra, noticing the situation, smiled and sat down with his hookah on a distant couch. Calling the hookah as a witness, he said—
"O huka! thou hast cool water in thy belly but a fire in thy head, be thou a witness. Let her who is angry with me talk to me, else I [176]will sit smoking for hours."
"O huka! you have cool water in your belly but a fire in your head, be a witness. Let the one who is angry with me talk to me, or else I [176] will sit smoking for hours."
At this Kamal Mani sat up, and in gentle anger turning to him her blue lotus eyes, said—
At this, Kamal Mani sat up and, with a gentle anger, turned to him with her blue lotus eyes and said—
"It is no use speaking to you while you smoke; you will not attend."
"It’s pointless to talk to you while you’re smoking; you won’t pay attention."
Then she rose from the couch and took away the huka.
Then she got up from the couch and removed the huka.
Kamal Mani's fit of sulking thus broken through, she gave Surja Mukhi's letter to be read, by way of explanation saying—
Kamal Mani's sulking finally came to an end, and she handed Surja Mukhi's letter to be read, explaining—
"Tell me the meaning of this, or I shall cut your pay."
"Tell me what this means, or I’ll reduce your pay."
"Rather give me next month's pay in advance, then I will explain."
"Just give me next month's paycheck upfront, then I'll explain."
Kamal Mani brought her mouth close to that of Srish Chandra, who took the coin he wished. After reading the letter he said—
Kamal Mani leaned in toward Srish Chandra, who took the coin he wanted. After reading the letter, he said—
"This is a joke!"
"This is a joke!"
"What is? your words, or the letter?"
"What is it? Your words, or the letter?"
"The letter."
"The letter."
"I shall discharge you to-day. Have you not a spark of understanding? Is this a matter a woman could jest about?"
"I’m letting you go today. Don’t you have any understanding? Is this something a woman could joke about?"
"I fear it is true."
"I think it's true."
"Nonsense! How can it be true?"
"Nonsense! How can that be true?"
"I fear my brother is forcing on this marriage."
"I worry my brother is pushing for this marriage."
Srish Chandra mused a while; then said, "I cannot understand this at all. What do you say? Shall I write to Nagendra?"
Srish Chandra thought for a moment and then said, "I really don’t get this at all. What do you think? Should I write to Nagendra?"
Kamal Mani assented. Srish made a grimace, but he wrote the letter.
Kamal Mani agreed. Srish made a face, but he wrote the letter.
Nagendra's reply was as follows:—
Nagendra's response was as follows:—
"Do not despise me, brother. Yet what is the use of such a petition; the despicable must be despised. I must effect this marriage. Should all the world abandon me I must do it, otherwise I shall go mad: I am not far short of it now. After this there seems nothing more to be said. You will perceive it is useless to try to turn me from it; but if you have anything to say I am ready to argue with you. If any one says that widow-marriage is contrary to religion, I will give him Vidya Sagar's essay to read. When so learned a teacher affirms that widow-marriage is approved by the Shastras, who can contradict?[178] And if you say that though allowed by the Shastras it is not countenanced by society, that if I carry out this marriage I shall be excluded from society, the answer is, 'Who in Govindpur can exclude me from society? In a place where I constitute society, who is there to banish me?' Nevertheless, for your sakes I will effect the marriage secretly; no one shall know anything about it. You will not make the foregoing objections; you will say a double marriage is contrary to morals. Brother, how do you know that it is opposed to morality? You have learned this from the English; it was not held so in India formerly. Are the English infallible? They have taken this idea from the law of Moses;[14] but we do not hold Moses' law to be the word of God, therefore why should we say that for a man to marry two wives is immoral? You will say if a man may marry two wives why should not a woman have two husbands? The answer is, if a woman had two husbands certain evils would follow which would not result from a [179]man's having two wives. If a woman has two husbands the children have no protector; should there be uncertainty about the father, society would be much disordered; but no such uncertainty arises when a man has two wives. Many other such objections might be pointed out. Whatever is injurious to the many is contrary to morals. If you think a man's having two wives opposed to morality, point out in what way it is injurious to the majority. You will instance to me discord in the family. I will give you a reason: I am childless. If I die my family name will become extinct; if I marry I may expect children: is this unreasonable? The final objection—Surja Mukhi: Why do I distress a loving wife with a rival? The answer is, Surja Mukhi is not troubled by this marriage: she herself suggested it; she prepared me for it; she is zealous for it. What objection then remains? and why should I be blamed?"
"Please don’t look down on me, brother. But what’s the point of arguing about this? If something is seen as despicable, it will be despised. I have to go through with this marriage. Even if the whole world turns against me, I must do it, or I’ll lose my mind—I’m almost there already. After this, there doesn’t seem to be anything more to discuss. You’ll see it’s pointless to try to change my mind; but if you have anything to say, I’m open to discussing it. If someone claims that marrying a widow is against religion, I’ll just have them read Vidya Sagar’s essay. When such a knowledgeable person says that widow marriage is supported by the Shastras, who can argue against that?[178] And if you say that while the Shastras allow it, society doesn’t accept it and that I would be excluded from society for going through with this marriage, then I’ll ask, ‘Who in Govindpur can really exclude me from society? In a place where I am part of society, who can kick me out?’ Still, for your sake, I will carry out the marriage discreetly; no one will know about it. You won’t bring up those objections; you’ll say that a double marriage is against morals. Brother, how do you know it conflicts with morality? You learned this from the English; it wasn’t regarded that way in India before. Are the English always right? They took this idea from Moses’ law;[14] but we don’t consider Moses’ law to be the word of God, so why should we say it’s immoral for a man to have two wives? You might argue that if a man can have two wives, why can’t a woman have two husbands? The answer is, if a woman had two husbands, it would create certain problems that wouldn’t occur with a man having two wives. If a woman has two husbands, the children have no guardian; if there’s uncertainty about who the father is, society would be thrown into chaos; but that uncertainty doesn’t exist when a man has two wives. There are many other concerns like this. Whatever harms the majority goes against morals. If you believe a man having two wives is immoral, show me how it harms most people. You might point to family discord. I’ll give you my perspective: I’m childless. If I die, my family name will die with me; if I marry, I might have children: is that unreasonable? The final concern—Surja Mukhi: Why should I upset a loving wife with a rival? The answer is, Surja Mukhi isn’t bothered by this marriage: she suggested it herself; she prepared me for it; she supports it. So what objection remains? Why should I be blamed?"
Kamal Mani having read the letter, said—
Kamal Mani, after reading the letter, said—
"In what respect he is to blame God knows; but what delusions he cherishes! I think men under[180]stand nothing. Be that as it may, arrange your affairs, husband; we must go to Govindpur."
"In what way he is at fault only God knows; but what delusions he holds onto! I think men under[180]stand nothing. Regardless, get your things in order, husband; we need to head to Govindpur."
"But," replied Srish, "can you stop the marriage?"
"But," replied Srish, "can you stop the wedding?"
"If not, I will die at my brother's feet."
"If not, I will die at my brother's feet."
"Nay, you can't do that; but we may bring the new wife away. Let us try."
"Nah, you can't do that; but we can take the new wife with us. Let's give it a shot."
Then both prepared for the journey to Govindpur. Early the next day they started by boat, and arrived there in due time. Before entering the house they met the women-servants and some neighbours, who had come to bring Kamal Mani from the ghat. Both she and her husband were extremely anxious to know if the marriage had taken place, but neither could put a single question. How could they speak to strangers of such a shameful subject?
Then both got ready for the trip to Govindpur. Early the next day, they set off by boat and arrived there on time. Before entering the house, they ran into the women servants and a few neighbors who had come to bring Kamal Mani from the ghat. Both she and her husband were really eager to know if the marriage had happened, but neither could ask a single question. How could they discuss such an embarrassing topic with strangers?
Hurriedly Kamal Mani entered the women's apartments; she even forgot Satish Babu, who remained lingering behind. Indistinctly, and dreading the answer, she asked the servants—
Hurriedly, Kamal Mani entered the women's quarters, even forgetting about Satish Babu, who stayed back. Vaguely and fearing the answer, she asked the servants—
"Where is Surja Mukhi?"
"Where's Surja Mukhi?"
She feared lest they should say the marriage[181] was accomplished, or that Surja Mukhi was dead. The women replied that their mistress was in her bed-room. Kamal Mani darted thither. For a minute or two she searched hither and thither, finding no one. At last she saw a woman sitting near a window, her head bowed down. Kamal Mani could not see her face, but she knew it was Surja Mukhi, who, now hearing footsteps, arose and came forward. Not even yet could Kamal ask if the marriage had taken place. Surja Mukhi had lost flesh; her figure, formerly straight as a pine, had become bent like a bow; her laughing eyes were sunk; her lily face had lost its roundness.
She worried they might say the marriage[181] had happened or that Surja Mukhi was dead. The women responded that their mistress was in her bedroom. Kamal Mani rushed there. For a minute or two, she searched around but found no one. Finally, she spotted a woman sitting by the window, her head down. Kamal Mani couldn't see her face, but she knew it was Surja Mukhi, who, upon hearing footsteps, stood up and came forward. Even then, Kamal couldn’t ask if the marriage had occurred. Surja Mukhi had lost weight; her once-straight figure had become bent like a bow; her once-bright eyes were sunken; her fair face had lost its fullness.
Kamal Mani comprehended that the marriage was accomplished. She inquired, "When was it?"
Kamal Mani understood that the wedding had taken place. She asked, "When was it?"
Surja Mukhi answered, "Yesterday."
Surja Mukhi replied, "Yesterday."
Then the two sat down together, neither speaking. Surja Mukhi hid her face in the other's lap, and wept. Kamal Mani's tears fell on Surja Mukhi's unbound hair.
Then the two sat down together, not saying a word. Surja Mukhi buried her face in the other's lap and cried. Kamal Mani's tears fell onto Surja Mukhi's loose hair.
Of what was Nagendra thinking at that time[182] as he sat in the boita khana? His thoughts said: "Kunda Nandini! Kunda is mine; Kunda is my wife! Kunda! Kunda! she is mine!"
Of what was Nagendra thinking at that time[182] as he sat in the boita khana? His thoughts said: "Kunda Nandini! Kunda is mine; Kunda is my wife! Kunda! Kunda! she is mine!"
Srish Chandra sat down beside him, but Nagendra could say little; he could think only, "Surja Mukhi herself hastened to give Kunda to me in marriage; who then can object to my enjoying this happiness?"
Srish Chandra sat down next to him, but Nagendra could hardly speak; he could only think, "Surja Mukhi herself rushed to give Kunda to me in marriage; who could possibly object to my enjoying this happiness?"


CHAPTER XXI.
SURJA MUKHI AND KAMAL MANI.

hen, in the evening, the two gained self-control to talk together, Surja Mukhi related the affair of the marriage from beginning to end.
Then, in the evening, the two calmed down enough to talk together. Surja Mukhi recounted the entire story of the marriage from start to finish.
Astonished, Kamal Mani said—
Shocked, Kamal Mani said—
"This marriage has been brought about by your exertions! Why have you thus sacrificed yourself?"
"This marriage happened because of your efforts! Why did you sacrifice yourself like this?"
Surja Mukhi smiled, a faint smile indeed, like the pale flashes of lightning after rain; then answered—
Surja Mukhi smiled, a very slight smile, like the brief flashes of lightning after a rain; then replied—
"What am I? Look upon your brother's face,[184] radiant with happiness, then you will know what joy is his. If I have been able with my own eyes to see him so happy, has not my life answered its purpose? What joy could I hope for in denying happiness to him? He for whom I would die rather than see him unhappy for a single hour; him I saw day and night suffering anguish, ready to abandon all joys and become a wanderer—what happiness would have remained to me? I said to him, 'My lord, your joy is my joy! Do you marry Kunda; I shall be happy.' And so he married her."
"What am I? Look at your brother's face,[184] glowing with happiness, then you will understand what joy he feels. If I've been able to see him this happy, hasn't my life fulfilled its purpose? What joy could I find in denying him happiness? He is the one I would die for rather than see him unhappy for even an hour; I watched him day and night in pain, ready to give up all joy and become a wanderer—what happiness would I have left? I told him, 'My lord, your joy is my joy! Marry Kunda; I will be happy.' And so he married her."
"And are you happy?" asked Kamal.
"And are you happy?" Kamal asked.
"Why do you still ask about me? what am I? If I had ever seen my husband hurt his foot by walking on a stony path, I should have reproached myself that I had not laid my body down over the stones that he might have stepped upon me."
"Why do you still ask about me? What am I? If I had ever seen my husband hurt his foot by walking on a rocky path, I would have blamed myself for not lying down over the stones so he could have stepped on me."
Surja Mukhi remained some moments silent, her dress drenched with her tears. Suddenly raising her face, she asked—
Surja Mukhi stayed silent for a moment, her dress soaked with her tears. Suddenly lifting her face, she asked—
"Kamal, in what country are females destroyed at birth?"[185]
"Kamal, in which country are females killed at birth?"[185]
Kamal understanding her thought, replied—
Kamal got her point and replied—
"What does it matter in what country it happens? it is according to destiny."
"What does it matter in which country it happens? It's just fate."
"Whose destiny could be better than mine was? Who so fortunate as myself? Who ever had such a husband? Beauty, wealth, these are small matters; but in virtues, whose husband equals mine? Mine was a splendid destiny; how has it changed thus?"
"Whose fate could be better than mine? Who is as lucky as I am? Who has ever had such a husband? Looks and money are trivial; but in terms of virtues, who matches my husband? I had an amazing destiny; how has it changed like this?"
"That also is destiny," said Kamal.
"That's destiny too," Kamal said.
"Then why do I suffer on this account?"
"Then why am I suffering because of this?"
"But just now you said you were happy in the sight of your husband's joyous face; yet you speak of suffering so much. Can both be true?"
"But just now you said you were happy looking at your husband's joyful face; yet you talk about suffering so much. Can both be true?"
"Both are true. I am happy in his joy. But that he should thrust me away; that he has thrust me away, and yet is so glad—"
"Both are true. I'm happy in his joy. But that he would push me away; that he has pushed me away, and yet is so glad—"
Surja could say no more, she was choking. But Kamal, understanding the meaning of her unfinished sentence, said—
Surja couldn't say anything else; she was choking. But Kamal, grasping the meaning of her incomplete sentence, said—
"Because of that your heart burns within you; then why do you say, 'What am I?' With half of your heart you still think of your own rights;[186] else why, having sacrificed yourself, do you repent?"
"Because of that your heart aches inside you; so why do you say, 'Who am I?' With part of your heart you still focus on your own rights; [186] otherwise, why, after giving yourself up, do you feel regret?"
"I do not repent," replied Surja. "That I have done right I do not doubt; but in dying there is suffering. I felt that I must give way, and I did so voluntarily. Still, may I not weep over that suffering with you?"
"I don’t regret it," Surja replied. "I have no doubt I did the right thing; but dying comes with pain. I felt I had to give in, and I did so willingly. Still, can I not share in that pain with you?"
Kamal Mani drew Surja Mukhi's head on to her breast; their thoughts were not expressed by words, but they conversed in their hearts. Kamal Mani understood the wretchedness of Surja Mukhi; Surja Mukhi comprehended that Kamal appreciated her suffering. They checked their sobs and ceased to weep.
Kamal Mani pulled Surja Mukhi’s head onto her chest; they didn’t say a word, but they communicated in their hearts. Kamal Mani understood Surja Mukhi's misery; Surja Mukhi realized that Kamal understood her pain. They held back their tears and stopped crying.
Surja Mukhi, setting her own affairs on one side, spoke of others, desired that Satish Babu should be brought, and talked to him. With Kamal she spoke long of Srish Chandra and of Satish, of the education of Satish and of his marriage. Thus they talked until far in the night, when Surja Mukhi embraced Kamal with much affection, and taking Satish into her lap kissed him lovingly.[187]
Surja Mukhi, putting her own matters aside, talked about others and wanted Satish Babu to be brought in so she could speak with him. She had a long conversation with Kamal about Srish Chandra and Satish, discussing Satish's education and his marriage. They chatted like this until late into the night, when Surja Mukhi hugged Kamal warmly and took Satish in her lap, kissing him affectionately.[187]
When they came to part, Surja Mukhi was again drowned in tears. She blessed Satish, saying—
When it was time to say goodbye, Surja Mukhi was once again in tears. She blessed Satish, saying—
"I wish that thou mayst be rich in the imperishable virtues of thy mother's brother; I know no greater blessing than this."
"I hope you will be rich in the lasting virtues of your uncle; I know no greater blessing than that."
Surja Mukhi spoke in her natural, gentle voice; nevertheless Kamal was astonished at its broken accents. "Bon!!" she exclaimed, "what is in your mind? tell me."
Surja Mukhi spoke in her soft, natural voice; yet Kamal was surprised by its uneven tones. "Bon!!" she exclaimed, "what's on your mind? Tell me."
"Nothing," replied Surja.
"Nothing," Surja replied.
"Do not hide it from me," said Kamal.
"Don't keep it from me," said Kamal.
"I have nothing to conceal," said Surja.
"I have nothing to hide," said Surja.
Pacified, Kamal went to her room. But Surja Mukhi had a purpose to conceal. This Kamal learned in the morning. At dawn she went to Surja Mukhi's room in search of her; Surja Mukhi was not there, but upon the undisturbed bed there lay a letter. At the sight of it Kamal became dizzy; she could not read it. Without doing so she understood all, understood that Surja Mukhi had fled. She had no desire to read the letter, but crushed it in her hand. Striking her forehead, she sat down upon the bed, ex[188]claiming: "I am a fool! how could I allow myself to be put off last night when parting from her?"
Pacified, Kamal went to her room. But Surja Mukhi had something to hide. Kamal found this out in the morning. At dawn, she went to Surja Mukhi's room to look for her; Surja Mukhi wasn't there, but on the untouched bed lay a letter. Just seeing it made Kamal dizzy; she couldn't bring herself to read it. Without reading it, she understood everything and realized that Surja Mukhi had run away. She didn't want to read the letter, so she crumpled it in her hand. Hitting her forehead, she sat down on the bed, exclaiming: "I'm such a fool! How could I let myself be delayed last night when saying goodbye to her?"
Satish Babu, standing near, joined his tears with his mother's.
Satish Babu, standing nearby, shared tears with his mother.
The first passion of grief having spent itself, Kamal Mani opened and read the letter. It was addressed to herself, and ran as follows:
The initial wave of grief had passed, and Kamal Mani opened and read the letter. It was addressed to her and said the following:
"On the day on which I heard from my husband's mouth that he no longer had any pleasure in me, that for Kunda Nandini he was losing his senses or must die—on that day I resolved, if I could find Kunda Nandini, to give her to my husband and to make him happy; and that when I had done so I would leave my home, for I am not able to endure to see my husband become Kunda Nandini's. Now I have done these things.
"On the day I heard from my husband that he no longer found joy in me and that he was losing his mind over Kunda Nandini or would rather die—that day I decided that if I could find Kunda Nandini, I would give her to my husband to make him happy; and once I did that, I would leave my home because I can't stand to see my husband belong to Kunda Nandini. Now I have done these things."
"I wished to have gone on the night of the wedding-day, but I had a desire to see my husband's happiness, to give him which I had sacrificed myself; also, I desired to see you once more. [189]Now these desires are fulfilled, and I have left.
"I wanted to leave on the night of the wedding, but I really wanted to see my husband's happiness, which I had sacrificed myself for; I also wanted to see you one more time. [189]Now that these desires are fulfilled, I have departed."
"When you receive this letter I shall be far distant. My reason for not telling you beforehand is that you would not have allowed me to go. Now I beg this boon from you, that you will make no search for me. I have no hope that I shall ever see you again. While Kunda Nandini remains I shall not return to this place, and should I be sought for I shall not be found. I am now a poor wanderer. In the garb of a beggar I shall go from place to place. In begging I shall pass my life; who wilt know me? I might have brought some money with me, but I was not willing. I have left my husband—would I take his money?
"When you get this letter, I’ll be far away. The reason I didn’t tell you before is that you wouldn’t have let me go. Now I ask you this favor: please don’t look for me. I have no hope of ever seeing you again. As long as Kunda Nandini is around, I won’t come back here, and if you search for me, you won’t find me. I’m now a poor wanderer. Dressed as a beggar, I’ll go from place to place. I’ll spend my life begging; who would recognize me? I could have brought some money with me, but I didn’t want to. I’ve left my husband—would I take his money?"
"Do one thing for me. Make a million salutations in my name at my husband's feet. I strove to write to him, but I could not; I could not see to write for tears, the paper was spoilt. Tearing it up, I wrote again and again, but in vain; what I have to say I could not write in any letter. Break the intelligence to him in any manner you think proper. Make him understand that I have not[190] left him in anger; I am not angry, am never angry, shall never be angry with him. Could I be angry with him whom it is my joy to think upon? To him whom I love so devotedly, I remain constant so long as I remain on earth. Why not? since I cannot forget his thousand graces. No one has so many graces as he. If I could forget his numerous virtues on account of one fault, I should not be worthy to be his wife. I have taken a last farewell of him. In doing this I have given up all I possess.
"Do one thing for me. Send a million greetings in my name at my husband's feet. I tried to write to him, but I couldn’t; I couldn't see to write because of my tears, and the paper was ruined. I tore it up and wrote again and again, but it was no use; what I wanted to say couldn't be put into any letter. Break the news to him however you think best. Help him understand that I haven't[190] left him in anger; I’m not angry, I never am, and I never will be angry with him. How could I be angry with someone I take joy in thinking about? To the one I love so deeply, I will remain faithful as long as I live. Why not? Since I can’t forget his countless charms. No one has as many charms as he does. If I could forget his many virtues because of one flaw, I wouldn’t deserve to be his wife. I’ve said my final goodbye to him. In doing this, I’ve given up everything I have."
"From you also I have taken a last farewell, wishing you the blessing that your husband and son may live long. May you long be happy! Another blessing I wish you—that on the day you lose your husband's love your life may end. No one has conferred this blessing on me."
"From you as well, I've taken a final goodbye, hoping that your husband and son live long lives. I wish you lasting happiness! There's another blessing I wish for you—that the day you lose your husband's love, your life may end. No one has given me that blessing."


CHAPTER XXII.
WHAT IS THE POISON TREE?

he poison tree, the narrative of whose growth we have given from the sowing of the seed to the production of its fruit, is to be found in every house. Its seed is sown in every field. There is no human being, however wise, whose heart is not touched by the passions of anger, envy, and desire. Some are able to subdue their passions as they arise; these are great men. Others have not this power, and here the poison tree springs up. The want of self-control is the germ of the poison tree, and also the cause of its[192] growth. This tree is very vigorous; once nourished it cannot be destroyed. Its appearance is very pleasant to the eye; from a distance its variegated leaves and opening buds charm the sight. But its fruit is poisonous; who eats it dies.
The poison tree, which we’ve described from the planting of the seed to the bearing of its fruit, exists in every home. Its seed is sown in every field. There’s no person, no matter how wise, whose heart isn’t affected by the feelings of anger, envy, and desire. Some people can control their emotions as they come up; these are the truly great ones. Others lack this ability, and that’s where the poison tree begins to grow. The lack of self-control is the seed of the poison tree and also the reason for its[192] growth. This tree is very strong; once it takes root, it cannot be destroyed. It looks very appealing; from a distance, its colorful leaves and budding flowers please the eye. But its fruit is toxic; anyone who eats it dies.
In different soils the poison tree bears different fruits. In some natures it bears sickness, in some sorrow, and other fruits. To keep the passions in subjection will is needed, and also power. The power must be natural, the will must be educated. Nature also is influenced by education; therefore education is the root of self-control. I speak not of such education as the schoolmaster can give. The most effectual teacher of the heart is suffering.
In various environments, the poison tree produces different results. In some people, it brings illness, in others, sadness, and various other consequences. To keep our emotions in check requires both willpower and strength. This strength must come naturally, while the will needs to be cultivated. Our nature can also be shaped by education; that's why education is fundamental to self-control. I'm not referring to the kind of education that a teacher provides. The most effective teacher for the heart is experience and suffering.
Nagendra had never had this education. The Creator sent him into the world the possessor of every kind of happiness. Beauty of form, unlimited wealth, physical health, great learning, an amiable disposition, a devoted wife—all these seldom fall to the lot of one person; all had been bestowed on Nagendra. Most important of all, Nagendra was of a happy disposition: he was[193] truthful and candid, yet agreeable: benevolent, yet just; generous, yet prudent; loving, yet firm in his duty. During the lifetime of his parents he was devoted to them. Attached to his wife, kind to his friends, considerate to his servants, a protector of his dependants, and peaceable towards his enemies, wise in counsel, trustworthy in act, gentle in conversation, ready at a jest. The natural reward of such a nature was unalloyed happiness. Since Nagendra's infancy it had been so: honour at home, fame abroad, devoted servants, an attached tenantry; from Surja Mukhi, unwavering, unbounded, unstained love. If so much happiness had not been allotted to him he could not have suffered so keenly. Had he not suffered he had not given way to his passion. Before he had cast the eyes of desire upon Kunda Nandini he had never fallen into this snare, because he had never known the want of love. Therefore he had never felt the necessity of putting a rein upon his inclinations. Accordingly, when the need of self-control arose he had not the power to exercise it. Unqualified happiness is often the source of suffer[194]ing; and unless there has been suffering, permanent happiness cannot exist.
Nagendra had never received this kind of education. The Creator sent him into the world equipped with every type of happiness. Good looks, unlimited wealth, perfect health, great knowledge, a pleasant personality, a dedicated wife—all these things rarely come to one person; Nagendra had been granted them all. Most importantly, Nagendra had a cheerful nature: he was[193] honest and straightforward, yet agreeable; kind-hearted, yet fair; generous, yet wise; loving, yet strong in his responsibilities. During his parents' lifetime, he was devoted to them. He was attached to his wife, compassionate toward his friends, considerate of his servants, a protector of his dependents, and peaceful with his enemies, wise in advice, reliable in actions, gentle in conversation, and quick with a joke. The natural outcome of such a character was pure happiness. Since childhood, it had been like this: respect at home, fame elsewhere, loyal servants, a supportive tenant community; from Surja Mukhi, unwavering, limitless, and pure love. If he hadn't been given so much happiness, he wouldn't have felt such deep suffering. Had he not suffered, he wouldn't have given in to his passion. Before he desired Kunda Nandini, he had never been trapped in this way because he had never experienced the need for love. Therefore, he had never felt the need to control his desires. So when self-control was necessary, he lacked the ability to exercise it. Unqualified happiness is often the source of suffering, and without suffering, true happiness cannot exist.
It cannot be said that Nagendra was faultless. His fault was very heavy. A severe expiation had begun.
It can't be said that Nagendra was perfect. His mistake was significant. A serious punishment had started.


CHAPTER XXIII.
THE SEARCH.

t is needless to say that when the news of Surja Mukhi's flight had spread through the house, people were sent in great haste in search of her. Nagendra sent people in all directions, Srish Chandra sent, and Kamal Mani sent. The upper servants among the women threw down their water-jars and started off; the Hindustani Durwans of the North-West Provinces, carrying bamboo staves, wearing cotton-quilted chintz coats, clattered along in shoes of undressed leather; the khansamahs, with towel on the[196] shoulder and silver chain round the waist, went in search of the mistress. Some relatives drove in carriages along the public roads. The villagers searched the fields and gháts; some sat smoking in council under a tree; some went to the barowari puja house, to the verandah of Siva's temple, and to the schools of the professors of logic, and in other similar places sat and discussed the matter. Old and young women formed a small cause court on the gháts; to the boys of the place it was cause of great excitement; many of them hoped to escape going to school.
It goes without saying that when the news of Surja Mukhi's disappearance spread through the house, people rushed out in every direction to find her. Nagendra dispatched people everywhere, Srish Chandra did the same, and so did Kamal Mani. The upper servants among the women dropped their water jars and took off; the Hindustani Durwans from the North-West Provinces, carrying bamboo sticks and wearing quilted chintz coats, hurried by in leather shoes; the khansamahs, with towels slung over their shoulders and wearing silver chains around their waists, set out to look for their mistress. Some relatives drove along the public roads in carriages. The villagers searched the fields and gháts; some sat smoking in discussion under a tree; others went to the barowari puja house, to the porch of Siva's temple, and to the schools of the professors of logic, where they sat and talked about it. Both old and young women gathered in a small makeshift court on the gháts; for the local boys, it was a source of great excitement, with many hoping to get out of going to school.
At first Srish Chandra and Kamal Mani comforted Nagendra, saying, "She has never been accustomed to walk; how far can she go? Half a mile, or a mile at the most; hence she must be sitting somewhere near at hand, we shall find her immediately."
At first, Srish Chandra and Kamal Mani reassured Nagendra, saying, "She's never really walked before; how far could she go? Half a mile, maybe a mile at most; so she must be sitting somewhere close by. We'll find her right away."
But when two or three hours had passed without bringing news of Surja Mukhi, Nagendra himself went forth. After some stay in the broiling sun he said to himself, "I am looking here, when no doubt she has been found by this time;"[197] and he returned home. Then finding no news of her he went out again, again to return, and again to go forth. So the day passed.
But after two or three hours went by without any news of Surja Mukhi, Nagendra decided to go out himself. After spending some time in the scorching sun, he thought, "I'm waiting here when she’s probably been found by now;"[197] and he went back home. Finding no news about her, he went out again, came back, and went out once more. And so, the day went on.
In fact, Srish Chandra's words were true—Surja Mukhi had never walked; how far could she go? About a mile from the house she was lying in a mango garden at the edge of a tank. A khansamah who was accustomed to serve in the women's apartment came to that place in his search, and recognizing her, said, "Will you not please to come home?"
In fact, Srish Chandra's words were true—Surja Mukhi had never walked; how far could she go? About a mile from the house, she was lying in a mango grove at the edge of a pond. A khansamah who was used to serving in the women's quarters came to that spot searching for her and, recognizing her, said, "Could you please come home?"
Surja Mukhi made no answer.
Surja Mukhi didn't respond.
Again he said, "Pray come home, the whole household is anxious."
Again he said, "Please come home; everyone in the house is worried."
Then, in an angry voice, Surja Mukhi said, "Who are you to take me back?"
Then, in an angry voice, Surja Mukhi said, "Who are you to take me back?"
The khansamah was frightened; nevertheless he remained standing.
The khansamah was scared; however, he stayed on his feet.
Then Surja Mukhi said, "If you stay there I shall drown myself in the tank."
Then Surja Mukhi said, "If you stay there, I'll drown myself in the tank."
The khansamah, finding he was unable to do anything, ran swiftly with the news to Nagendra. Nagendra came with a palanquin for her; but[198] Surja Mukhi was no longer there. He searched all about, but found no trace.
The khansamah, realizing he couldn't do anything, quickly ran to inform Nagendra. Nagendra arrived with a palanquin for her; but[198] Surja Mukhi was no longer there. He looked everywhere but found no sign of her.
Surja Mukhi had wandered thence into a wood. There she met an old woman who had come to gather sticks. She had heard of a reward being offered for finding Surja Mukhi, therefore on seeing her she asked—
Surja Mukhi had wandered off into a forest. There she met an old woman who was collecting sticks. The woman had heard about a reward being offered for finding Surja Mukhi, so upon seeing her, she asked—
"Are you not our mistress?"
"Are you not our boss?"
"No, mother," replied Surja Mukhi.
"No, Mom," replied Surja Mukhi.
"Yes, you must be our mistress."
"Yes, you have to be our leader."
"Who is your mistress?"
"Who's your mistress?"
"The lady of the Babu's house."
"The woman of the Babu's house."
"Am I wearing any gold ornaments that I should be the lady of the Babu's house?"
"Am I wearing any gold jewelry that I should be the lady of the Babu's house?"
The old woman thought, "That is true," and went further into the wood gathering sticks.
The old woman said to herself, "That's true," and continued deeper into the woods, collecting sticks.
Thus the day passed vainly; the night brought no more success. The two following days brought no tidings, though nothing was neglected in the search. Of the male searchers, scarcely any one knew Surja Mukhi by sight; so they seized many poor women and brought them before Nagendra. At length the daughters of respectable people[199] feared to walk along the roads or on the gháts. If one was seen alone, the devoted Hindustani Durwans followed, calling out "Ma Thakurani," and, preventing them from bathing, brought a palki. Many of those who were not accustomed to travel in a palki seized the opportunity of doing so free of expense.
Thus the day went by uselessly; the night didn’t bring any better news. The next two days also saw no updates, even though every effort was made in the search. Almost none of the male searchers recognized Surja Mukhi by sight, so they captured many unfortunate women and brought them before Nagendra. Eventually, the daughters of respectable families[199] were too afraid to walk along the roads or by the gháts. If one was spotted alone, the devoted Hindustani Durwans would follow, calling out "Ma Thakurani," and, preventing them from bathing, would bring a palki. Many of those who weren’t used to traveling in a palki took the chance to do so for free.
Srish Chandra could not remain longer. Returning to Calcutta, he began a search there. Kamal Mani, remaining in Govindpur, continued to look for the lost one.
Srish Chandra couldn't stay any longer. After heading back to Calcutta, he started a search there. Meanwhile, Kamal Mani stayed in Govindpur, still looking for the missing person.


CHAPTER XXIV.
EVERY SORT OF HAPPINESS IS FLEETING.

he happiness for which Kunda Nandini had never ventured to hope was now hers; she had become the wife of Nagendra. On the marriage day she thought, "This joy is boundless; it can never end!"
The happiness that Kunda Nandini had never dared to hope for was now hers; she had become Nagendra's wife. On her wedding day, she thought, "This joy is endless; it can never fade!"
But after the flight of Surja Mukhi, repentance came to Kunda Nandini. She thought: "Surja Mukhi rescued me in my time of distress, when but for her I should have been lost; now on my account she is an outcast. If I am not to be happy, it were better I had died." She perceived [202]that happiness has limits.
But after Surja Mukhi left, Kunda Nandini felt regret. She thought, "Surja Mukhi saved me when I was in trouble; without her, I would have been lost. Now she is an outcast because of me. If I can't be happy, I might as well have died." She realized that happiness has its limits. [202]
It is evening. Nagendra is lying on the couch; Kunda Nandini sits at his head fanning him. Both are silent. This is not a good sign. No one else is present, yet they do not speak. This was not like perfect happiness; but since the flight of Surja Mukhi, where had there been perfect happiness? Kunda's thoughts were constantly seeking some means by which things could be restored to their former state, and she now ventured to ask Nagendra what could be done.
It’s evening. Nagendra is lying on the couch, and Kunda Nandini sits by his head, fanning him. Both of them are silent. This isn’t a good sign. No one else is around, yet they don’t talk. This wasn’t what perfect happiness looked like; but since Surja Mukhi left, when had there been perfect happiness? Kunda's thoughts were always trying to find a way to bring things back to how they used to be, and she now dared to ask Nagendra what could be done.
Nagendra, somewhat disturbed, replied: "Do you wish things to be as they were before? do you repent having married me?"
Nagendra, feeling a bit unsettled, responded: "Do you want things to go back to how they were before? Do you regret marrying me?"
Kunda Nandini felt hurt. She said: "I never hoped that you would make me happy by marrying me. I am not saying I repent it. I am asking what can be done to induce Surja Mukhi to return."
Kunda Nandini felt hurt. She said: "I never thought you would make me happy by marrying me. I'm not saying I regret it. I'm asking what can be done to get Surja Mukhi to come back."
"Never speak of that. To hear the name of Surja Mukhi from your lips gives me pain; on your account Surja Mukhi has abandoned me."
"Don't ever mention that. Hearing the name Surja Mukhi from you hurts me; because of you, Surja Mukhi has left me."
This was known to Kunda, yet to hear Nagendra say it hurt her. She asked herself: "Is[203] this censure? How evil is my fate, yet I have committed no fault; Surja Mukhi brought about the marriage." She did not utter these thoughts aloud, but continued fanning.
This was known to Kunda, yet hearing Nagendra say it hurt her. She asked herself: "Is[203] this criticism? How unfair is my fate, yet I have done nothing wrong; Surja Mukhi caused the marriage." She didn’t say these thoughts out loud, but kept fanning.
Noticing her silence, Nagendra said: "Why do you not talk? Are you angry?"
Noticing her silence, Nagendra said, "Why aren’t you talking? Are you upset?"
"No," she replied.
"No," she said.
"Is a bare 'no' all you can say? Do you not longer love me?"
"Is a simple 'no' all you can say? Do you not love me anymore?"
"Do I not love you!"
"I don't love you!"
"'Do I not love you!' Words to soothe a boy. Kunda, I believe you never loved me."
"'Do I not love you!' Words to comfort a boy. Kunda, I think you never loved me."
"I have always loved you," said Kunda, earnestly.
"I've always loved you," Kunda said sincerely.
Wise as Nagendra was, he did not comprehend the difference between Surja Mukhi and Kunda Nandini. It was not that Kunda did not feel the love for him that Surja Mukhi felt, but that she knew not how to express it. She was a girl of a timid nature; she had not the gift of words. What more could she say? But Nagendra, not understanding this, said: "Surja Mukhi always loved me. Why hang pearls on a monkey's [204]neck? an iron chain were better."
As wise as Nagendra was, he couldn't see the difference between Surja Mukhi and Kunda Nandini. It wasn’t that Kunda didn’t love him the way Surja Mukhi did, but she just didn’t know how to show it. She was a shy girl; she didn’t have a way with words. What more could she say? But Nagendra, not realizing this, said, “Surja Mukhi always loved me. Why put pearls around a monkey’s neck? An iron chain would be better.” [204]
At this Kunda Nandini could not restrain her tears. Slowly rising, she went out of the room. There was no one now to whom she could look for sympathy. Kunda had not sought Kamal Mani since her arrival. Imagining herself the one chiefly to blame in the marriage, Kunda had not dared to show herself to Kamal Mani; but now, wounded to the quick, she longed to go to her compassionate, loving friend, who on a former occasion had soothed and shared her grief and wiped away her tears. But now things were altered. When Kamal saw Kunda Nandini approaching she was displeased, but she made no remark. Kunda, sitting down, began to weep; but Kamal did not inquire into the cause of her grief, so Kunda remained silent. Presently, Kamal Mani, saying "I am busy," went away. Kunda Nandini perceived that all joy is fleeting.
At this, Kunda Nandini couldn't hold back her tears. Slowly getting up, she left the room. There was no one left to turn to for comfort. Kunda hadn't sought out Kamal Mani since she arrived. Believing herself to be mainly at fault in the marriage, Kunda didn't dare to face Kamal Mani; but now, deeply hurt, she wanted to go to her caring, loving friend, who had previously comforted her, shared in her sorrow, and wiped away her tears. But everything had changed. When Kamal saw Kunda Nandini coming closer, she felt annoyed, but said nothing. Kunda sat down and started to cry; however, Kamal didn’t ask what was wrong, so Kunda stayed quiet. Eventually, Kamal Mani said, "I’m busy," and left. Kunda Nandini realized that all happiness is temporary.


CHAPTER XXV.
THE FRUIT OF THE POISON TREE.

agendra's letter to Hara Deb Ghosal:
agendra's letter to Hara Deb Ghosal:
"You wrote that of all the acts I have done in my life, my marriage with Kunda Nandini is the most erroneous. I admit it. By doing this I have lost Surja Mukhi. I was very fortunate in obtaining Surja Mukhi for a wife. Every one digs for jewels, but only one finds the Koh-i-nur. Surja Mukhi is the Koh-i-nur. In no respect can Kunda Nandini fill her place. Why, then, did I instal Kunda Nandini[206] in her seat? Delusion, delusion; now I am sensible of it. I have waked up from my dream to realize my loss. Now where shall I find Surja Mukhi? Why did I marry Kunda Nandini? Did I love her? Certainly I loved her; I lost my senses for her; my life was leaving me. But now I know this was but the love of the eye; or else, when I have been only fifteen days married, why do I say, 'Did I love her?' I love her still; but where is my Surja Mukhi?
"You wrote that out of everything I've done in my life, my marriage to Kunda Nandini is the biggest mistake. I accept that. By doing this, I've lost Surja Mukhi. I was really lucky to have Surja Mukhi as my wife. Everyone searches for treasures, but only one finds the Koh-i-nur. Surja Mukhi is the Koh-i-nur. In no way can Kunda Nandini take her place. So why did I put Kunda Nandini[206] in her position? It's delusion, pure delusion; now I see it clearly. I've woken up from my dream to realize my loss. Now where will I find Surja Mukhi? Why did I marry Kunda Nandini? Did I love her? Of course I loved her; I lost myself for her; my life felt like it was slipping away. But now I realize that this was just a fleeting attraction; otherwise, after being married for only fifteen days, why do I question, 'Did I love her?' I still love her; but where is my Surja Mukhi?"
"I meant to have written much more to-day; but I cannot, it is very difficult."
"I intended to write a lot more today, but I can't; it's really hard."
Hara Deb Ghosal's reply:
Hara Deb Ghosal's response:
"I understand your state of mind. It is not that you do not love Kunda Nandini; you do love her, but when you said it was the love of the eye only, you spoke the truth. Towards Surja Mukhi your love is deep, but for a couple of days it has been covered by the shadow of Kunda Nandini. Now you understand that you have lost Surja Mukhi. So long as the sun remains unclouded, we are warmed by his beams and we love the[207] clouds; but when the sun is gone we know that he was the eye of the world. Not understanding your own heart, you have committed this great error. I will not reproach you more, because you fell into it under a delusion which it was very difficult to resist.
"I get what you're feeling. It's not that you don't love Kunda Nandini; you do, but when you said it was just an infatuation, you were being honest. Your feelings for Surja Mukhi run deep, but for the past few days, they've been overshadowed by Kunda Nandini. Now, you realize that you've lost Surja Mukhi. As long as the sun shines brightly, we enjoy its warmth and love the clouds; but when the sun disappears, we realize it was truly the light of the world. Not understanding your own heart, you've made this big mistake. I won’t blame you anymore because you fell into it under an illusion that was really hard to resist."
"The mind has many different affections; men call them all love, but only that condition of heart which is ready to sacrifice its own happiness to secure that of another is true love. The passion for beauty is not love. The unstable lust for beauty is no more love than the desire of the hungry for rice. True love is the offspring of reason. When the qualities of a lovable person are perceived by the understanding, the heart being charmed by these qualities is drawn towards the possessor; it desires union with that treasury of virtues and becomes devoted to it. The fruits of this love are expansion of the heart, self-forgetfulness, self-denial. This is true love. Shakespeare, Valmiki, Madame de Staël, are its poets; as Kalidas, Byron, Jayadeva are of the other species of love. The effect on the heart produced by the sight of[208] beauty is dulled by repetition. But love caused by the good qualities of a person does not lose its charm, because beauty has but one appearance, because virtues display themselves anew in every fresh act. If beauty and virtues are found together, love is quickly generated; but if once the intelligence be the cause for love, it is of no importance whether beauty exists or not. Towards an ugly husband or an ugly wife love of this kind holds a firm place. The love produced by virtue as virtue is lasting certainly, but it takes time to know these virtues; therefore this love never becomes suddenly strong, it is of gradual growth. The infatuation for beauty springs into full force at first sight; its first strength is so uncontrollable that all other faculties are destroyed by it. Whether it be a lasting love there is no means of knowing. It thinks itself undying. So you have thought. In the first strength of this infatuation your enduring love for Surja Mukhi became invisible to your eyes. This delusion is inherent in man's nature; therefore I do not censure you, rather I counsel you to strive to be [209]happy in this state.
"The mind experiences many different feelings; people label them all as love, but only the kind of love that is willing to sacrifice its own happiness for the sake of someone else’s is true love. The passion for beauty isn’t love. The fleeting desire for beauty is no more love than a hungry person’s craving for rice. True love stems from reason. When we recognize the qualities of a lovable person, our hearts are enchanted by those qualities and drawn to the person; we desire to connect with that treasure of virtues and become devoted to it. The rewards of this love are an expansion of the heart, self-forgetfulness, and self-denial. This is true love. Shakespeare, Valmiki, and Madame de Staël are its poets; just as Kalidas, Byron, and Jayadeva represent the other kind of love. The effect on the heart caused by the sight of beauty fades with repetition. But love rooted in the good qualities of a person retains its charm, as beauty has only one appearance while virtues reveal themselves anew in every action. When beauty and virtues are found together, love is quickly sparked; however, if the mind is the reason for love, it doesn’t matter if beauty is present or not. Such love can thrive even with an unattractive partner. The love that arises from virtue is indeed lasting, but it takes time to recognize those virtues; thus, this love doesn’t suddenly become intense; it develops gradually. The infatuation with beauty can surge powerfully at first sight; its initial strength is so overwhelming that it can overshadow all other feelings. Whether it lasts is uncertain. It often perceives itself as eternal. You have felt this way. In that initial burst of infatuation, your lasting love for Surja Mukhi became obscured to you. This misconception is a part of human nature; for that reason, I don’t blame you, but rather I encourage you to strive to be happy in this situation."
"Do not despair; Surja Mukhi will certainly return. How long can she exist without seeing you? So long as she remains absent, do you cherish Kunda Nandini. So far as I understand your letters she is not without attractive qualities. When the infatuation for her beauty is lessened, there may remain something to create a lasting love; if that is so, you will be able to make yourself happy with her; and should you not again see your elder wife you may forget her, especially as the younger one loves you. Be not careless about love; for in love is man's only spotless and imperishable joy, the final means by which his nature can be elevated. Without love man could not dwell in this world that he has made so evil."
"Don’t worry; Surja Mukhi will definitely come back. How long can she go without seeing you? While she’s away, make sure to value Kunda Nandini. From what I gather from your letters, she has her own appealing qualities. As the infatuation for her looks fades, there might be something left that could develop into lasting love; if that’s the case, you’ll be able to find happiness with her. And if you don’t see your first wife again, you might be able to move on, especially since the younger one loves you. Don’t take love for granted; because love is the only pure and everlasting joy for a man, the ultimate way to elevate his spirit. Without love, man couldn’t survive in this world he has made so corrupt."
Nagendra Natha's reply:
Nagendra Natha's response:
"I have not answered your letter until now because of the trouble of my mind. I understand all you have written, and I know your counsel is good. But I cannot resolve to stay at home. A month ago my Surja Mukhi left me, and I have had no news of her. I design to follow her; I will[210] wander from place to place in search of her. If I find her I will bring her home, otherwise I shall not return. I cannot remain with Kunda Nandini; she has become a pain to my eyes. It is not her fault, it is mine, but I cannot endure to see her face. Formerly I said nothing to her, but now I am perpetually finding fault with her. She weeps—what can I do? I shall soon be with you."
"I haven't replied to your letter until now because I've been feeling troubled. I understand everything you've written and I know your advice is good. But I can't decide to stay at home. A month ago, my Surja Mukhi left me, and I haven't heard from her since. I plan to follow her; I will[210] wander from place to place looking for her. If I find her, I’ll bring her home; otherwise, I won't come back. I can't stay with Kunda Nandini; she has become a source of irritation for me. It’s not her fault, it's mine, but I can't stand to look at her anymore. I used to say nothing to her, but now I'm always pointing out her faults. She cries—what can I do? I'll be with you soon."
As Nagendra wrote so he acted. Placing the care of everything in the hands of the Dewan during his temporary absence, he set forth on his wanderings. Kamal Mani had previously gone to Calcutta; therefore of the people mentioned in this narrative, Kunda Nandini alone was left in the Datta mansion, and the servant Hira remained in attendance upon her.
As Nagendra wrote, so he did. He entrusted everything to the Dewan during his short absence and set off on his travels. Kamal Mani had already moved to Calcutta; therefore, among the people mentioned in this story, only Kunda Nandini was left in the Datta mansion, with the servant Hira still attending to her.
Darkness fell on the large household. As a brilliantly-lighted, densely-crowded dancing-hall, resounding with song and music, becomes dark, silent, and empty when the performance is over, so that immense [211]household became when abandoned by Surja Mukhi and Nagendra Natha.
Darkness descended on the large household. Just like a brightly lit, crowded dance hall filled with song and music turns dark, silent, and empty once the show is over, the immense [211] household transformed when Surja Mukhi and Nagendra Natha left.
As a child, having played for a day with a gaily painted doll, breaks and throws it away, and by degrees, earth accumulating, grass springs over it, so Kunda Nandini, abandoned by Nagendra Natha, remained untended and alone amid the crowd of people in that vast house.
As a child, after spending a day playing with a brightly painted doll, you eventually set it aside and toss it away, and over time, dirt builds up, and grass grows over it. Similarly, Kunda Nandini, left behind by Nagendra Natha, was neglected and alone amidst the throngs of people in that enormous house.
As when the forest is on fire the nests of young birds are consumed in the flames, and the mother-bird bringing food, and seeing neither tree, nor nest, nor young ones, with cries of anguish whirls in circles round the fire seeking her nest, so did Nagendra wander from place to place in search of Surja Mukhi.
As when a forest is on fire and the nests of baby birds are burned in the flames, and the mother bird returns with food, seeing no tree, no nest, and no young ones, crying out in distress as she circles around the fire searching for her nest, so did Nagendra wander from place to place looking for Surja Mukhi.
As in the fathomless depths of the boundless ocean, a jewel having fallen cannot again be seen, so Surja Mukhi was lost to sight.
As in the deep, endless ocean, a jewel that has fallen is never seen again, so Surja Mukhi was lost to view.


CHAPTER XXVI.
THE SIGNS OF LOVE.

s a cotton rag placed near fire becomes burnt, so the heart of Hira became ever more inflamed by the remarkable beauty of Debendra. Many a time Hira's virtue and good name would have been endangered by passion, but that Debendra's character for sensuality without love came to her mind and proved a safeguard. Hira had great power of self-control, and it was through this power that she, though not very virtuous, had hitherto easily preserved her chastity. The more certainly to rule her heart, Hira determined to go[214] again to service. She felt that in daily work her mind would be distracted, and she would be able to forget this unfortunate passion which stung like the bite of a scorpion. Thus when Nagendra, leaving Kunda Nandini at Govindpur, was about to set forth, Hira, on the strength of past service, begged to be re-engaged, and Nagendra consented. There was another cause for Hira's resolve to resume service. In her greed for money, anticipating that Kunda would become the favourite of Nagendra, she had taken pains to bring her under her own sway. "Nagendra's wealth," she had reflected, "will fall into Kunda's hands, and when it is Kunda's it will be Hira's." Now Kunda had become the mistress of Nagendra's house, but she had not obtained possession of any special wealth. But at this time Hira's mind was not dwelling on this matter. Hira was not thinking of wealth; even had she done so, money obtained from Kunda would have been as poison to her.
As a cotton rag placed near fire gets burned, Hira's heart became increasingly inflamed by the stunning beauty of Debendra. Many times, Hira's reputation and virtue could have been at risk due to her passion, but the thought of Debendra's reputation for seeking pleasure without love served as a warning. Hira had a strong ability to control herself, and because of this strength, she managed to maintain her chastity despite not being very virtuous. To better manage her feelings, Hira decided to return to work. She believed that busying herself with daily tasks would distract her mind and help her forget the painful passion that felt like a scorpion's sting. So, when Nagendra, after leaving Kunda Nandini at Govindpur, was about to leave, Hira asked to be re-hired based on her previous service, and Nagendra agreed. There was another reason behind Hira's decision to go back to work. Eager for money, she imagined that Kunda would become Nagendra’s favorite, and she sought to keep her under her influence. "Nagendra's wealth," she thought, "will end up in Kunda's hands, and when it's Kunda's, it will eventually be Hira's." Now Kunda had become the lady of Nagendra's house, but she hadn't acquired any significant wealth. However, at this moment, Hira wasn't focused on that. Hira wasn’t thinking about riches; even if she had, money gained from Kunda would have felt like poison to her.
Hira was able to endure the pain of her own unsatisfied passion, but she could not bear De[215]bendra's passion for Kunda. When Hira heard that Nagendra was journeying abroad, and that Kunda would remain as grihini (house-mistress), then, remembering Haridasi Boisnavi, she became much alarmed, and stationed herself as a sentinel to place obstacles in the path of Debendra. It was not from a desire to secure the welfare of Kunda Nandini that Hira conceived this design. Under the influence of jealousy Hira had become so enraged with Kunda, that far from wishing her well she would gladly have seen her go to destruction. But in jealous fear lest Debendra should gain access to Kunda, Hira constituted herself the guardian of Nagendra's wife.
Hira could handle the pain of her own unfulfilled desires, but she couldn’t stand Debendra’s feelings for Kunda. When Hira found out that Nagendra was going abroad and that Kunda would be the house-mistress, she remembered Haridasi Boisnavi and became very worried. So, she took it upon herself to set up obstacles in Debendra's way. It wasn’t out of a desire to protect Kunda Nandini that Hira came up with this plan. Consumed by jealousy, Hira was so furious with Kunda that she wouldn’t have minded if something bad happened to her. But out of jealous fear that Debendra might get close to Kunda, Hira took on the role of guardian over Nagendra’s wife.
Thus the servant Hira became the cause of suffering to Kunda, who saw that Hira's zeal and attention did not arise from affection. She perceived that Hira, though a servant, showed want of trust in her, and continually scolded and insulted her. Kunda was of a very peaceful disposition; though rendered ill by Hira's conduct she said nothing to her. Kunda's nature was calm, Hira's passionate. Thus Kunda, though[216] the master's wife, submitted as if she were a dependant; Hira lorded it over her as if she were the mistress. Sometimes the other ladies of the house, seeing Kunda suffer, scolded Hira, but they could not stand before Hira's eloquence.
Thus, the servant Hira became the source of Kunda's suffering, who realized that Hira's enthusiasm and attention didn't come from care. She noticed that Hira, despite being a servant, showed a lack of trust in her and constantly scolded and insulted her. Kunda had a very peaceful nature; even though Hira's behavior made her ill, she kept quiet about it. Kunda was calm, while Hira was passionate. So, Kunda, even though she was the master's wife, acted like she was a dependent; Hira treated her like she was in charge. Sometimes the other women in the house, seeing Kunda in pain, scolded Hira, but they couldn’t match Hira's sharp tongue.[216]
The Dewan hearing of her doings, said to Hira: "Go away; I dismiss you."
The Dewan, hearing about her actions, said to Hira: "Leave; I'm letting you go."
Hira replied, with flaming eyes: "Who are you to dismiss me? I was placed here by the master, and except at his command I will not go. I have as much power to dismiss you as you have to dismiss me."
Hira replied, her eyes blazing: "Who are you to brush me off? I was put here by the master, and unless he tells me to leave, I won’t go. I have just as much authority to send you away as you do to send me away."
The Dewan, fearing further insult, said not another word. Except Surja Mukhi, no one could rule Hira.
The Dewan, afraid of more disrespect, didn’t say anything else. Aside from Surja Mukhi, no one could govern Hira.
One day, after the departure of Nagendra, Hira was lying alone in the creeper-covered summer-house in the flower-garden near to the women's apartments. Since it had been abandoned by Surja Mukhi and Nagendra, Hira had taken possession of this summer-house. It was evening, an almost full moon shone in the heavens. Her rays shining through the branches of the[217] trees fell on the white marble, and danced upon the wind-moved waters of the talao close by. The air was filled with the intoxicating perfume of the scented shrubs. There is nothing in nature so intoxicating as flower-perfumed air. Hira suddenly perceived the figure of a man in a grove of trees; a second glance showed it to be Debendra. He was not disguised, but wore his own apparel.
One day, after Nagendra left, Hira was lying alone in the summer-house covered in vines in the flower garden near the women's quarters. Since Surja Mukhi and Nagendra had abandoned it, Hira had claimed this summer-house as her own. It was evening, and an almost full moon was shining in the sky. Its rays filtered through the branches of the[217] trees and fell on the white marble, dancing on the gently moving waters of the talao nearby. The air was filled with the intoxicating scent of the flowering shrubs. There’s nothing in nature more intoxicating than air filled with the fragrance of flowers. Hira suddenly noticed a figure of a man among the trees; a second look revealed it to be Debendra. He wasn’t in disguise and was wearing his usual clothes.
Hira exclaimed in astonishment: "You are very bold, sir; should you be discovered you will be beaten!"
Hira exclaimed in shock, "You're really bold, sir; if you get caught, you'll be punished!"
"Where Hira is, what cause have I for fear?" Thus saying, Debendra sat down by Hira, who, after a little silent enjoyment this pleasure, said—
"Where Hira is, why should I be afraid?" With that, Debendra sat down next to Hira, who, after a moment of quietly enjoying this pleasure, said—
"Why have you come here? You will not be able to see her whom you hoped to see."
"Why are you here? You won’t be able to see her like you hoped."
"I have already attained my hope. I came to see you."
"I have already achieved my dream. I came to see you."
Hira, not deceived by the sweet, flattering words she coveted, said with a laugh: "I did not know I was destined to such pleasure; still, since it has befallen me, let us go where I can satisfy myself[218] by beholding you without interruption. Here there are many obstacles."
Hira, not fooled by the sweet, flattering words she wanted to hear, laughed and said, "I didn’t realize I was meant for such enjoyment; nonetheless, since it has come to me, let’s go somewhere I can fully appreciate you without any interruptions. There are too many distractions here."
"Where shall we go?" said Debendra.
"Where should we go?" said Debendra.
"Into that summer-house; there we need fear nothing."
"Into that summer house; there we shouldn’t worry about anything."
"Do not fear for me."
"Don't worry about me."
"If there is nothing to fear for you, there is for me. If I am seen with you what will be my position?"
"If you have nothing to worry about, I do. If people see me with you, what will that mean for me?"
Shrinking at this, Debendra said: "Let us go. Would it not be well that I should renew acquaintance with your new grihini?"
Shrinking at this, Debendra said: "Let's go. Wouldn't it be nice for me to reconnect with your new grihini?"
The burning glance of hate cast on him by Hira at these words, Debendra failed to see in the uncertain light.
The fiery look of hatred that Hira shot at him when he said those words, Debendra couldn't make out in the dim light.
Hira said: "How will you get to see her?"
Hira asked, "How will you be able to see her?"
"By your kindness it will be accomplished," said Debendra.
"Thanks to your kindness, it will be done," said Debendra.
"Then do you remain here on the watch; I will bring her to you."
"Then you stay here on watch; I'll bring her to you."
With these words Hira went out of the summer-house. Proceeding some distance, she stopped beneath the shelter of a tree and gave way to a[219] burst of sobbing: then went on into the house—not to Kunda Nandini, but to the darwans (gatekeepers), to whom she said—
With those words, Hira left the summer house. After walking a short distance, she stopped under the shade of a tree and broke down in tears. Then she went into the house—not to Kunda Nandini, but to the darwans (gatekeepers), to whom she said—
"Come quickly; there is a thief in the garden."
"Come quickly; there's a thief in the garden."
Then Dobe, Chobe, Paure, and Teowari, taking thick bamboo sticks in their hands, started off for the flower-garden. Debendra, hearing from afar the sound of their clumsy, clattering shoes, and seeing their black, napkin-swathed chins, leaped from the summer-house and fled in haste. Teowari and Co. ran some distance, but they could not catch him; yet he did not get off scot-free. We cannot certainly say whether he tasted the bamboo, but we have heard that he was pursued by some very abusive terms from the mouths of the darwans; and that his servant, having had a little of his brandy, in gossip the next day with a female friend remarked—
Then Dobe, Chobe, Paure, and Teowari, with thick bamboo sticks in their hands, headed out to the flower garden. Debendra, hearing their clumsy, noisy shoes from a distance and seeing their black, napkin-covered chins, jumped out of the summer house and ran away quickly. Teowari and the others chased him for a while, but they couldn't catch him; however, he didn't get away without a few consequences. It's unclear if he actually faced the bamboo, but we've heard that he received some very harsh words from the darwans; and that his servant, having had a bit of his brandy, casually mentioned in a chat the next day with a female friend—
"To-day, when I was rubbing the Babu with oil, I saw a bruise on his back."
"Today, while I was rubbing oil on the Babu, I noticed a bruise on his back."
Returning home, Debendra made two resolutions: the first, that while Hira remained he would never again enter the Datta house; the second, that he[220] would retaliate upon Hira. In the end he had a frightful revenge upon her. Hira's venial fault received a heavy punishment, so heavy that at sight of it even Debendra's stony heart was lacerated. We will relate it briefly later.
Returning home, Debendra made two resolutions: first, that as long as Hira was around, he would never enter the Datta house again; second, that he[220] would get back at Hira. Ultimately, he took a terrible revenge on her. Hira's minor mistake was met with a severe punishment, so harsh that even Debendra's cold heart was torn apart at the sight of it. We'll discuss it briefly later.


CHAPTER XXVII.
BY THE ROADSIDE.

t is one of the worst days of the rainy season; not once had the sun appeared, only a continuous downpour of rain. The well metalled road to Benares was a mass of slush. But one traveller was to be seen, his dress was that of a Brahmachari (an ascetic): yellow garments, a bead chaplet on his neck, the mark on the forehead, the bald crown surrounded by only a few white hairs, a palm leaf umbrella in one hand, in the other a brass drinking-vessel. Thus the Brahmachari travelled in the soaking rain through the dark day, followed by a night as black as though[222] the earth were full of ink. He could not distinguish between road and no road; nevertheless he continued his way, for he had renounced the world, he was a Brahmachari. To those who have given up worldly pleasures, light and darkness, a good and a bad road, are all one. It was now far on in the night; now and then it lightened; the darkness itself was preferable, was less frightful than those flashes of light.
It is one of the worst days of the rainy season; not once has the sun appeared, just a continuous downpour of rain. The well-paved road to Benares was a mass of slush. But one traveler could be seen, dressed like a Brahmachari (an ascetic): yellow clothes, a bead necklace around his neck, a mark on his forehead, a bald head surrounded by just a few white hairs, a palm leaf umbrella in one hand, and a brass drinking vessel in the other. Thus, the Brahmachari trudged through the soaking rain on this dark day, followed by a night as black as if[222] the earth were full of ink. He couldn't tell the difference between road and no road; yet he continued on, for he had renounced the world—he was a Brahmachari. For those who have given up worldly pleasures, light and darkness, a good road and a bad road are all the same. It was now quite late in the night; occasionally there was lightning; the darkness itself felt better, less frightening than those flashes of light.
"Friend!"
"Buddy!"
Plodding along in the darkness the Brahmachari heard suddenly in the pathway some such sound, followed by a long sigh. The sound was muffled, nevertheless it seemed to come from a human throat, from some one in pain. The Brahmachari stood waiting, the lightning flashed brightly; he saw something lying at the side of the road—was it a human being? Still he waited; the next flash convinced him that his conjecture was correct. He called out, "Who are you lying by the roadside?" No one made reply. Again he asked. This time an indistinct sound of distress caught his ear. Then the Brahmachari laid his umbrella[223] and drinking-vessel on the ground, and extending his hands began to feel about. Ere long he touched a soft body; then as his hand came in contact with a knot of hair he exclaimed, "Oh, Durga, it is a woman!"
Plodding along in the darkness, the Brahmachari suddenly heard a noise in the pathway, followed by a long sigh. The sound was muffled, but it seemed to come from a human throat, from someone in pain. The Brahmachari stood still, and when the lightning flashed brightly, he saw something lying by the side of the road—was it a person? He waited again; the next flash confirmed his suspicion. He called out, "Who are you lying by the roadside?" No one answered. He asked again. This time, he caught an indistinct sound of distress. Then the Brahmachari laid his umbrella[223] and drinking vessel on the ground, and began to feel around with his hands. Before long, he touched a soft body; then, as his hand came into contact with a knot of hair, he exclaimed, "Oh, Durga, it’s a woman!"
Leaving umbrella and drinking-vessel, he raised the dying or senseless woman in his arms, and, leaving the road, crossed the plain towards a village; he was familiar with the neighbourhood, and could make his way through the darkness. His frame was not powerful, yet he carried this dying creature like a child through this difficult path. Those who are strong in goodwill to others are not sensible of bodily weakness.
Leaving his umbrella and drinking vessel behind, he picked up the unconscious woman in his arms and, stepping off the road, made his way across the field toward a village. He knew the area well and could navigate through the darkness. Though he wasn't physically strong, he carried this dying person like a child through the challenging terrain. Those who genuinely want to help others often don’t feel their own physical limitations.
Bearing the unconscious woman in his arms, the Brahmachari stopped at the door of a leaf-thatched hut at the entrance of the village, and called to one within, "Haro, child, are you at home?"
Bearing the unconscious woman in his arms, the Brahmachari stopped at the door of a thatched hut at the village entrance and called out to someone inside, "Haro, kid, are you home?"
A woman replied, "Do I hear the Thakur's voice? When did the Thakur come?"
A woman responded, "Do I hear the Thakur speaking? When did the Thakur arrive?"
"But now. Open the door quickly; I am in a great difficulty."[224]
"But now. Open the door quickly; I'm in serious trouble."[224]
Haro Mani opened the door. The Brahmachari, bidding her light a lamp, laid his burden on the floor of the hut. Haro lit the lamp, and bringing it near the dying woman, they both examined her carefully. They saw that she was not old, but in the condition of her body it was difficult to guess her age. She was extremely emaciated, and seemed struck with mortal illness. At one time she certainly must have had beauty, but she had none now. Her wet garments were greatly soiled, and torn in a hundred places; her wet, unbound hair was much tangled; her closed eyes deeply sunk. She breathed, but was not conscious; she seemed near death.
Haro Mani opened the door. The Brahmachari, asking her to light a lamp, set down his load on the floor of the hut. Haro lit the lamp and brought it close to the dying woman, and they both examined her carefully. They saw that she wasn’t old, but it was hard to tell her age given her condition. She was extremely thin and appeared seriously ill. At one point, she must have been beautiful, but that was no longer the case. Her wet clothes were very dirty and torn in many places; her damp, unkempt hair was tangled; her closed eyes were deeply set. She was breathing but not aware; she seemed close to death.
Haro Mani asked: "Who is this? where did you find her?"
Haro Mani asked, "Who is this? Where did you find her?"
The Brahmachari explained, and added, "I see she is near death, yet if we could but renew the warmth of her body she might live; do as I tell you and let us see."
The Brahmachari explained, "I can see she's close to death, but if we can just bring back the warmth to her body, she might survive; follow my instructions and let's find out."
Then Haro Mani, following the Brahmachari's directions, changed the woman's wet clothes for dry garments, and dried her wet hair. Then lighting a fire, they endeavoured to warm her.[225]
Then Haro Mani, following the Brahmachari's instructions, changed the woman's wet clothes for dry ones and dried her hair. Then, after lighting a fire, they tried to warm her.[225]
The Brahmachari said: "Probably she has been long without food; if there is milk in the house, give her a little at a time."
The Brahmachari said: "She’s probably gone a long time without food; if there’s milk in the house, give her some little by little."
Haro Mani possessed a cow, and had milk at hand; warming some, she administered it slowly. After a while the woman opened her eyes; when Haro Mani said, "Where have you come from, mother?"
Haro Mani had a cow and some milk available; she warmed some up and gave it to her slowly. After a while, the woman opened her eyes, and Haro Mani asked, "Where have you come from, mother?"
Reviving, the woman asked, "Where am I?"
Reviving, the woman asked, "Where am I?"
The Brahmachari answered, "Finding you dying by the roadside, I brought you hither. Where are you going?"
The Brahmachari replied, "I found you dying by the side of the road and brought you here. Where are you headed?"
"Very far."
"Really far."
Haro Mani said: "You still wear your bracelet; is your husband living?"
Haro Mani said, "You're still wearing your bracelet; is your husband alive?"
The sick woman's brow darkened. Haro Mani was perplexed.
The sick woman's expression turned grim. Haro Mani was confused.
The Brahmachari asked "What shall we call you? what is your name?"
The Brahmachari asked, "What should we call you? What's your name?"
The desolate creature, moving a little restlessly, replied, "My name is Surja Mukhi."
The lonely creature, shifting around a bit anxiously, said, "My name is Surja Mukhi."


CHAPTER XXVIII.
IS THERE HOPE?

here was apparently no hope of Surja Mukhi's life. The Brahmachari, not understanding her symptoms, next morning called in the village doctor. Ram Krishna Rai was very learned, particularly in medicine. He was renowned in the village for his skill. On seeing the symptoms, he said—
there was apparently no hope for Surja Mukhi's life. The Brahmachari, not understanding her symptoms, called in the village doctor the next morning. Ram Krishna Rai was very knowledgeable, especially in medicine. He was well-known in the village for his skill. Upon seeing the symptoms, he said—
"This is consumption, and on this fever has set in. It is, I fear, a mortal sickness; still she may live."
"This is consumption, and now a fever has taken hold. I’m afraid it’s a deadly illness; still, she might survive."
These words were not said in the presence of Surja Mukhi.[228]
These words weren't spoken in front of Surja Mukhi.[228]
The doctor administered physic, and seeing the destitute condition of the woman he said nothing about fees. He was not an avaricious man.
The doctor gave treatment, and noticing the woman's poor condition, he said nothing about payment. He wasn't a greedy man.
Dismissing the physician, the Brahmachari sent Haro Mani about other work, and entered into conversation with Surja Mukhi, who said—
Dismissing the doctor, the Brahmachari sent Haro Mani off to do other tasks and started a conversation with Surja Mukhi, who said—
"Thakur, why have you taken so much trouble about me? There is no need to do so on my account."
"Thakur, why have you gone through so much trouble for me? You don’t need to do that for my sake."
"What trouble have I taken?" replied the Brahmachari; "this is my work. To assist others is my vocation; if I had not been occupied with you, some one else in similar circumstances would have required my services."
"What trouble have I taken?" replied the Brahmachari; "this is my work. Helping others is my purpose; if I hadn't been engaged with you, someone else in a similar situation would have needed my help."
"Then leave me, and attend to others. You can assist others, you cannot help me."
"Then go ahead and take care of others. You can help them, but you can't help me."
"Wherefore?" asked the Brahmachari.
"Why?" asked the Brahmachari.
"To restore me to health will not help me. Death alone will give me peace. Last night, when I fell down by the roadside, I hoped that I should die. Why did you save me?"
"Restoring me to health won't help. Only death will give me peace. Last night, when I collapsed by the side of the road, I hoped I would die. Why did you save me?"
"I knew not that you were in such deep trouble. But however deep it is, self-destruction is a great[229] sin. Never be guilty of such an act. To kill one's self is as sinful as to kill another."
"I had no idea you were in such serious trouble. But no matter how serious it is, self-destruction is a great[229] sin. Never do something like that. Taking your own life is just as wrong as taking someone else's."
"I have not tried to kill myself; death has approached voluntarily, therefore I hoped; but even in dying I have no joy." Saying these words, Surja Mukhi's voice broke, and she began to weep.
"I haven't tried to take my own life; death has come on its own, so I held on to hope; but even in dying, I feel no joy." As she said this, Surja Mukhi's voice cracked, and she started to cry.
The Brahmachari said: "Whenever you speak of dying I see you weep; you wish to die. Mother, I am like a son to you; look upon me as such, and tell me your wish. If there is any remedy for your trouble, tell me, and I will bring it about. Wishing to say this, I have sent Haro Mani away, and am sitting alone with you. From your speech I infer that you belong to a very respectable family. That you are in a state of very great anxiety, I perceive. Why should you not tell me what it is? Consider me as your son, and speak."
The Brahmachari said: "Every time you talk about dying, I see you cry; you want to die. Mother, I am like a son to you; think of me that way and share your wishes with me. If there's any way to fix your problems, let me know, and I'll make it happen. I wanted to say this, so I sent Haro Mani away and am now sitting here alone with you. From what you've said, I can tell you come from a very respectable family. I can see that you are very anxious. Why not tell me what's bothering you? Think of me as your son and speak freely."
Surja Mukhi, with wet eyes, said: "I am dying; why should I feel shame at such a time? I have no other trouble than this, that I am dying without seeing my husband's face. If I could but see him once I should die happy."
Surja Mukhi, with tears in her eyes, said: "I'm dying; why should I feel ashamed at a time like this? My only problem is that I'm dying without seeing my husband's face. If I could just see him once, I would die happy."
The Brahmachari wiped his eyes also, and said:[230]
The Brahmachari wiped his eyes too and said:[230]
"Where is your husband? It is impossible for you to go to him now; but if he, on receiving the news, could come here, I would let him know by letter."
"Where is your husband? You can't go to him right now, but if he could come here after hearing the news, I would inform him with a letter."
Surja Mukhi's wan face expanded into a smile; then again becoming dejected, she said: "He could come, but I cannot tell if he would. I am guilty of a great offence against him, but he is full of kindness to me; he might forgive me, but he is far from here. Can I live till he comes?"
Surja Mukhi's pale face broke into a smile; then, feeling down again, she said: "He could come, but I can’t say if he will. I've wronged him deeply, but he’s always been so kind to me; he might forgive me, but he’s so far away. Can I hold on until he arrives?"
Finding, on further inquiry, that the Babu lived at Haripur Zillah, the Brahmachari brought pen and paper, and, taking Surja Mukhi's instructions, wrote as follows:
Finding, after digging a little deeper, that the Babu lived in Haripur Zillah, the Brahmachari got pen and paper, and, following Surja Mukhi's instructions, wrote this:
"Sir,—I am a stranger to you. I am a Brahman, leading the life of a Brahmachari. I do not even know who you are; this only I know, that Srimati Surja Mukhi Dasi is your wife. She is lying in a dangerous state of illness in the house of the Boisnavi Haro Mani, in the village of Madhupur. She is under medical treatment, but it appears uncertain whether she will recover.[231] Her last desire is to see you once more and die. If you are able to pardon her offence, whatever it may be, then pray come hither quickly. I address her as 'Mother.' As a son I write this letter by her direction. She has no strength to write herself. If you come, do so by way of Ranigunj. Inquire in Ranigunj for Sriman Madhab Chandra, and on mentioning my name he will send some one with you. In this way you will not have to search Madhupur for the house. If you come, come quickly, or it may be too late. Receive my blessing.
"Sir,—I’m a stranger to you. I’m a Brahman living the life of a Brahmachari. I don’t even know who you are; all I know is that Srimati Surja Mukhi Dasi is your wife. She is in a critical condition in the house of the Boisnavi Haro Mani, in the village of Madhupur. She is receiving medical care, but it’s uncertain if she will pull through.[231] Her last wish is to see you once more before she passes away. If you can forgive her for whatever she may have done, please come here quickly. I call her 'Mother.' I’m writing this letter as her son, as she doesn’t have the strength to write herself. If you decide to come, please take the route through Ranigunj. Ask in Ranigunj for Sriman Madhab Chandra, and mention my name; he will send someone to accompany you. This way, you won’t have to search for her house in Madhupur. If you come, please hurry, or it may be too late. Receive my blessings."
"(Signed) Siva Prasad."
"(Signed) Siva Prasad."
The letter ended, the Brahmachari asked, "What address shall I write?"
The letter finished, the Brahmachari asked, "What address should I write?"
Surja Mukhi replied, "When Haro Mani comes I will tell you."[15]
Surja Mukhi replied, "I’ll tell you when Haro Mani arrives."[15]
Haro Mani, having arrived, addressed the letter to Nagendra Natha Datta, and took it to the post-office. When the Brahmachari had gone, [232]Surja Mukhi, with tearful eyes, joined hands, and upturned face, put up her petition to the Creator, saying, "Oh, supreme God, if you are faithful, then, as I am a true wife, may this letter accomplish its end. I knew nothing during my life save the feet of my husband. I do not desire heaven as the reward of my devotion; this only I desire, that I may see my husband ere I die."
Haro Mani, having arrived, addressed the letter to Nagendra Natha Datta and took it to the post office. When the Brahmachari had left, [232] Surja Mukhi, with tearful eyes, joined her hands, lifted her face, and prayed to the Creator, saying, "Oh, supreme God, if you are true, then, as I am a devoted wife, may this letter fulfill its purpose. Throughout my life, I have known nothing but the feet of my husband. I don’t wish for heaven as a reward for my devotion; all I desire is to see my husband before I die."
But the letter did not reach Nagendra. He had left Govindpur long before it arrived there. The messenger gave the letter to the Dewan, and went away. Nagendra had said to the Dewan, "When I stay at any place I shall write thence to you. When you receive my instructions, forward any letters that may have arrived for me."
But the letter didn’t reach Nagendra. He had left Govindpur long before it got there. The messenger handed the letter to the Dewan and left. Nagendra had told the Dewan, "Whenever I’m staying somewhere, I’ll write to you from there. When you get my messages, please send on any letters that have come for me."
In due time Nagendra reached Benares, whence he wrote to the Dewan, who sent Siva Prasad's epistle with the rest of the letters. On receiving this letter Nagendra was struck to the heart, and, pressing his forehead, exclaimed in distress, "Lord of all the world, preserve my senses for one moment!"[233]
In time, Nagendra arrived in Benares, where he wrote to the Dewan, who sent Siva Prasad's letter along with the other correspondence. Upon receiving this letter, Nagendra felt a deep shock and, placing his hand on his forehead, cried out in despair, “Lord of the universe, keep my senses for just one moment!”[233]
This prayer reached the ear of God, and for a time his senses were preserved. Calling his head servant, he said, "I must go to-night to Ranigunj; make all arrangements."
This prayer reached God's ears, and for a while, his senses were intact. He called his head servant and said, "I need to go to Ranigunj tonight; make all the arrangements."
The man went to do his bidding; then Nagendra fell senseless on the floor.
The man went to fulfill his duty; then Nagendra collapsed on the floor.
That night Nagendra left Benares behind him. Oh, world-enchanting Benares! what happy man could have quitted thee on such an autumn night with satiated eyes? It is a moonless night. From the Ganges stream, in whatever direction you look you will see the sky studded with stars—from endless ages ever-burning stars, resting never. Below, a second sky reflected in the deep blue water; on shore, flights of steps, and tall houses showing a thousand lights; these again reflected in the river. Seeing this, Nagendra closed his eyes. To-night he could not endure the beauty of earth. He knew that Siva Prasad's letter had been delayed many days. Where was Surja Mukhi now?
That night, Nagendra left Benares behind. Oh, enchanting Benares! What happy person could leave you on such an autumn night with contented eyes? It’s a moonless night. From the Ganges, in every direction you look, the sky is filled with stars—eternal, ever-burning stars that never rest. Below, a second sky is reflected in the deep blue water; on the shore, flights of steps and tall buildings show a thousand lights, which are reflected in the river again. Seeing this, Nagendra closed his eyes. Tonight, he couldn’t bear the beauty of the earth. He knew that Siva Prasad's letter had been delayed for many days. Where was Surja Mukhi now?


CHAPTER XXIX.
HIRA'S POISON TREE HAS BLOSSOMED.

n the day when the durwans had driven out Debendra Babu with bamboos, Hira had laughed heartily within herself. But later she had felt much remorse. She thought, "I have not done well to disgrace him; I know not how much I have angered him. Now I shall have no place in his thoughts; all my hopes are destroyed."
On the day when the durwans had chased Debendra Babu away with bamboos, Hira had laughed to herself. But later she felt a lot of regret. She thought, "I shouldn’t have humiliated him; I don’t know how much I’ve upset him. Now I won’t have a place in his thoughts; all my hopes are gone."
Debendra also was occupied in devising a plan of vengeance upon Hira for the punishment she had caused to be inflicted on him. At last he sent for Hira, and after one or two days of doubt she came. Debendra showed no displeasure, and[236] made no allusion to what had occurred. Avoiding that, he entered into pleasant conversation with her. As the spider spreads his net for the fly, so Debendra spread his net for Hira.
Debendra was also busy coming up with a plan to get back at Hira for the punishment she had made him endure. Finally, he called for Hira, and after a day or two of uncertainty, she came. Debendra didn’t show any anger and[236] didn’t mention what had happened. Instead, he engaged her in friendly conversation. Just like a spider lays out a web for a fly, Debendra laid out his trap for Hira.
In the hope of obtaining her desire, Hira easily fell into the snare. Intoxicated with Debendra's sweet words, she was imposed upon by his crafty speech. She thought, "Surely this is love! Debendra loves me."
In her eagerness to get what she wanted, Hira quickly fell into the trap. Enchanted by Debendra's flattering words, she was deceived by his clever talk. She thought, "This must be love! Debendra loves me."
Hira was cunning, but now her cunning did not serve her. The power which the ancient poets describe as having been used to disturb the meditations of Siva, who had renounced passion—by that power Hira had lost her cunning.
Hira was clever, but now her cleverness didn't help her. The force that ancient poets say was used to interrupt Siva's thoughts, who had given up desire—by that force, Hira had lost her cleverness.
Then Debendra took his guitar, and, stimulated by wine, began to sing. His rich and cultivated voice gave forth such honied waves of song, that Hira was as one enchanted. Her heart became restless, and melted with love of Debendra. Then in her eyes Debendra seemed the perfection of beauty, the essence of all that was adorable to a woman. Her eyes overflowed with tears springing from love.[237]
Then Debendra picked up his guitar, and, inspired by wine, started to sing. His rich and refined voice produced such sweet waves of melody that Hira was completely entranced. Her heart felt restless and melted with love for Debendra. In her eyes, he appeared to be the epitome of beauty, the embodiment of everything a woman could admire. Tears filled her eyes, flowing from her love.[237]
Putting down his guitar, Debendra wiped away her tears. Hira shivered. Then Debendra began such pleasant jesting, mingled with loving speeches, and adorned his conversation with such ambiguous phrases, that Hira, entranced, thought, "This is heavenly joy!" Never had she heard such words. If her senses had not been bewildered she would have thought, "This is hell."
Putting down his guitar, Debendra wiped away her tears. Hira shivered. Then Debendra started making such light-hearted jokes, mixed with loving words, and filled his conversation with such confusing phrases that Hira, captivated, thought, "This is pure bliss!" She had never heard anything like it. If her mind hadn't been so overwhelmed, she would have thought, "This is torture."
Debendra had never known real love; but he was very learned in the love language of the old poets. Hearing from Debendra songs in praise of the inexpressible delights of love, Hira thought of giving herself up to him. She became steeped in love from head to foot. Then again Debendra sang with the voice of the first bird of spring. Hira, inspired by love, joined in with her feminine voice. Debendra urged her to sing. Hira, with sparkling eyes and smiling face, impelled by her happy feelings, sang a love song, a petition for love. Then, sitting in that evil room, with sinful hearts, the two, under the influence of evil desires, bound themselves to live in sin.
Debendra had never experienced true love, but he was well-versed in the love poetry of the old masters. When Hira heard Debendra's songs praising the indescribable joys of love, she thought about surrendering herself to him. She became completely consumed by love. Then Debendra sang with the voice of the first bird of spring. Hira, inspired by her feelings, joined in with her sweet voice. Debendra encouraged her to sing more. Hira, with sparkling eyes and a smiling face, driven by her happiness, sang a love song, a plea for love. Then, sitting in that terrible room, with sinful hearts, the two, influenced by their desires, committed themselves to a life of sin.
Hira knew how to subdue her heart, but having[238] no inclination to do so she entered the flame as easily as an insect. Her belief that Debendra did not love her had been her protection until now. When her love for Debendra was but in the germ she smilingly confessed it to herself, but turned away from him without hesitation. When the full-grown passion pierced her heart she took service to distract her thoughts. But when she imagined he loved her she had no desire to resist. Therefore she now had to eat the fruit of the poison tree.
Hira knew how to control her feelings, but since she had no desire to, she stepped into the fire as easily as an insect. Her belief that Debendra didn’t love her had kept her safe until now. When her feelings for Debendra were just beginning, she privately admitted it to herself but didn’t hesitate to distance herself from him. When her love fully grew and pierced her heart, she took a job to keep her mind busy. But when she thought he loved her, she didn't want to hold back. So now she had to face the consequences of her decisions.
People say that you do not see sin punished in this world. Be that true or not, you may be sure that those who do not rule their own hearts will have to bear the consequences.
People say you don’t see sin punished in this world. Whether that’s true or not, you can be sure that those who don’t control their own hearts will face the consequences.


CHAPTER XXX.
NEWS OF SURJA MUKHI.

t is late autumn. The waters from the fields are drying up; the rice crop is ripening; the lotus flowers have disappeared from the tanks. At dawn, dew falls from the boughs of the trees; at evening, mist rises over the plains. One day at dawn a palanquin was borne along the Madhupur road. At this sight all the boys of the place assembled in a row; all the daughters and wives, old and young, resting their water-vessels on the hip, stood awhile to gaze. The husbandmen, leaving the rice crop, sickle in hand and with[240] turbaned heads, stood staring at the palanquin. The influential men of the village sat in committee. A booted foot was set down from the palanquin: the general opinion was that an English gentleman had arrived; the children thought it was Bogie.
It’s late autumn. The water from the fields is drying up; the rice crop is ripening; the lotus flowers have vanished from the ponds. At dawn, dew falls from the branches of the trees; in the evening, mist rises over the fields. One day at dawn, a palanquin was carried along the Madhupur road. At this sight, all the boys of the area gathered in a row; all the daughters and wives, both young and old, with their water vessels resting on their hips, paused to watch. The farmers, leaving the rice crop with sickles in hand and their heads wrapped in turbans, stood staring at the palanquin. The influential men of the village were sitting in a meeting. A booted foot stepped down from the palanquin: everyone thought an English gentleman had arrived; the children believed it was Bogie.
When Nagendra Natha had descended from the palanquin, half a dozen people saluted him because he wore pantaloons and a smoking-cap. Some thought he was the police inspector; others that he was a constable. Addressing an old man in the crowd, Nagendra inquired for Siva Prasad Brahmachari.
When Nagendra Natha got out of the palanquin, about six people greeted him because he was wearing pants and a smoking cap. Some thought he was the police inspector; others thought he was a constable. Nagendra asked an older man in the crowd about Siva Prasad Brahmachari.
The person addressed felt certain that this must be a case of investigation into a murder, and that therefore it would not be well to give a truthful answer. He replied, "Sir, I am but a child; I do not know as much as that."
The person being spoken to was convinced that this had to do with a murder investigation, and so it wouldn't be wise to give a truthful answer. He replied, "Sir, I’m just a kid; I don’t know anything about that."
Nagendra perceived that unless he could meet with an educated man he would learn nothing. There were many in the village, therefore Nagendra went to a house of superior class. It proved to be that of Ram Kristo Rai, who, noticing the[241] arrival of a strange gentleman, requested him to sit down. Nagendra, inquiring for Siva Prasad Brahmachari, was informed that he had left the place.
Nagendra realized that he wouldn't learn anything unless he could talk to an educated person. Since there were many in the village, he decided to visit a more affluent household. It turned out to be that of Ram Kristo Rai, who, seeing the[241] arrival of a stranger, invited him to take a seat. When Nagendra asked for Siva Prasad Brahmachari, he was told that he had already left the area.
Much dejected, Nagendra asked, "Where is he gone?"
Much dejected, Nagendra asked, "Where has he gone?"
"That I do not know; he never remains long in one place."
"That I don’t know; he never stays in one place for long."
"Does any one know when he will return?" asked Nagendra.
"Does anyone know when he will be back?" asked Nagendra.
"I have some business with him, therefore I also made that inquiry, but no one can tell me."
"I need to talk to him about something, so I asked about it, but nobody seems to know."
"How long is it since he left?"
"How long has it been since he left?"
"About a month."
"About a month ago."
"Could any one show me the house of Haro Mani Boisnavi, of this village?"
"Can anyone show me the house of Haro Mani Boisnavi from this village?"
"Haro Mani's house stood by the roadside; but it exists no longer, it has been destroyed by fire."
"Haro Mani's house was by the road; but it's no longer there, it has been burned down."
Nagendra pressed his forehead. In a weak voice he asked, "Where is Haro Mani?"
Nagendra pressed his forehead. In a faint voice, he asked, "Where is Haro Mani?"
"No one can say. Since the night her house was burned she has fled somewhere. Some even say that she herself set fire to it."[242]
"No one knows. Since the night her house burned down, she has disappeared. Some even claim that she started the fire herself."[242]
In a broken voice Nagendra asked, "Did any other woman live in her house?"
In a shaky voice, Nagendra asked, "Did any other woman live in her house?"
"No. In the month Sraban a stranger, falling sick, stayed in her house. She was placed there by the Brahmachari. I heard her name was Surja Mukhi. She was ill of consumption; I attended her, had almost cured her. Now—"
"No. In the month Sraban, a stranger fell ill and stayed in her house. The Brahmachari had placed her there. I heard her name was Surja Mukhi. She was suffering from tuberculosis; I took care of her and had nearly cured her. Now—"
Breathing hard, Nagendra repeated, "Now?"
Out of breath, Nagendra asked, "Now?"
"In the destruction of Haro Mani's house the woman was burnt."
"In the destruction of Haro Mani's house, the woman was burned."
Nagendra fell from his chair, striking his head severely. The blow stunned him. The doctor attended to his needs.
Nagendra fell from his chair, hitting his head hard. The impact left him dazed. The doctor came to help him.
Who would live in a world so full of sorrow? The poison tree grows in every one's court. Who would love? to have one's heart torn in pieces. Oh, Creator! why hast Thou not made this a happy world? Thou hadst the power if Thou hadst wished to make it a world of joy! Why is there so much sorrow in it?
Who would want to live in a world filled with so much sadness? The poison tree grows in everyone's backyard. Who would choose to love, only to have their heart ripped apart? Oh, Creator! Why haven't You made this a joyful world? You had the power if You wanted to create a world of happiness! Why is there so much sorrow in it?
When, at evening, Nagendra Natha left Madhupur in his palanquin, he said to himself—
When Nagendra Natha left Madhupur in his palanquin that evening, he thought to himself—
"Now I have lost all. What is lost—happi[243]ness? that was lost on the day when Surja Mukhi left home. Then what is lost now—hope? So long as hope remains to man all is not lost; when hope dies, all dies."
"Now I’ve lost everything. What’s lost—happiness? That was gone the day Surja Mukhi left home. So what’s lost now—hope? As long as hope exists for a person, not everything is lost; when hope dies, everything dies."
Now, therefore, he resolved to go to Govindpur, not with the purpose of remaining, but to arrange all his affairs and bid farewell to the house. The zemindari, the family house, and the rest of his landed property of his own acquiring, he would make over by deed to his nephew, Satish Chandra. The deed would need to be drawn up by a lawyer, or it would not stand. The movable wealth he would send to Kamal Mani in Calcutta, sending Kunda Nandini there also. A certain amount of money he would reserve for his own support in Government securities. The account-books of the estate he would place in the hands of Srish Chandra.
Now, he decided to go to Govindpur, not to stay, but to take care of his affairs and say goodbye to the house. He would transfer the zemindari, the family home, and the rest of his property that he had acquired to his nephew, Satish Chandra, through a legal deed. The deed needed to be prepared by a lawyer, or it wouldn't be valid. He would send his movable assets to Kamal Mani in Calcutta, and he would also send Kunda Nandini there. He would set aside a certain amount of money for his own needs in government securities. He would hand the estate’s account books to Srish Chandra.
He would not give Surja Mukhi's ornaments to his sister, but would keep them beside him wherever he went, and when his time came would die looking at them. After completing the needful arrangements he would leave home, revisit the[244] spot where Surja Mukhi had died, and then resume his wandering life. So long as he should live he would hide in some corner of the earth.
He wouldn’t give Surja Mukhi’s jewelry to his sister, but instead kept it with him wherever he went, and when his time came, he would die looking at it. After making the necessary arrangements, he would leave home, go back to the[244] place where Surja Mukhi had died, and then continue his wandering life. As long as he lived, he would stay hidden in some corner of the world.
Such were Nagendra's thoughts as he was borne on in his palanquin; its doors were open, the night was lightened by the October moon, stars shone in the sky. The telegraph-wires by the wayside hummed in the wind; but on that night not even a star could seem beautiful in the eyes of Nagendra, even the moonlight seemed harsh. All things seemed to give pain. The earth was cruel. Why should everything that seemed beautiful in days of happiness seem to-day so ugly? Those long slender moonbeams by which the heart was wont to be refreshed, why did they now seem so glaring? The sky is to-day as blue, the clouds as white, the stars as bright, the wind as playful; the animal creation, as ever, rove at will. Man is as smiling and joyous, the earth pursues its endless course, family affairs follow their daily round. The world's hardness is unendurable. Why did not the earth open and swallow up Nagendra in his palanquin?[245]
Nagendra's thoughts drifted as he was carried along in his palanquin; its doors were open, the October moon illuminated the night, and stars sparkled in the sky. The telegraph wires by the roadside buzzed gently in the breeze; but on this night, not even a single star looked beautiful to Nagendra, and even the moonlight felt harsh. Everything seemed to cause him pain. The earth felt cruel. Why did everything that appeared beautiful during happier days seem so ugly today? Those long, delicate moonbeams that once refreshed his heart, why did they now seem so glaring? The sky is just as blue today, the clouds as white, the stars as bright, and the wind as playful; animals roam freely as always. People are smiling and joyful, the earth continues its endless path, and family matters carry on as usual. The hardness of the world is unbearable. Why didn't the earth open up and swallow Nagendra and his palanquin whole?[245]
Thus thinking, Nagendra perceived that he was himself to blame for all. He had reached his thirty-third year only, yet he had lost all. God had given him everything that makes the happiness of man. Riches, greatness, prosperity, honour—all these he had received from the beginning in unwonted measure. Without intelligence these had been nothing, but God had given that also without stint. His education had not been neglected by his parents; who was so well instructed as himself? Beauty, strength, health, lovableness—these also nature had given to him with liberal hand. That gift which is priceless in the world, a loving, faithful wife, even this had been granted to him; who on this earth had possessed more of the elements of happiness? who was there on earth to-day more wretched? If by giving up everything, riches, honour, beauty, youth, learning, intelligence, he could have changed conditions with one of his palanquin-bearers, he would have considered it a heavenly happiness. "Yet why a bearer?" thought he; "is there a prisoner in the gaols of this country who is not[246] more happy than I? not more holy than I? They have slain others; I have slain Surja Mukhi. If I had ruled my passions, would she have been brought to die such a death in a strange place? I am her murderer. What slayer of father, mother, or son, is a greater sinner than I? Was Surja Mukhi my wife only? She was my all. In relation a wife, in friendship a brother, in care a sister, abounding in hospitality, in love a mother, in devotion a daughter, in pleasure a friend, in counsel a teacher, in attendance a servant! My Surja Mukhi! who else possesses such a wife? A helper in domestic affairs, a fortune in the house, a religion in the heart, an ornament round the neck, the pupil of my eyes, the blood of my heart, the life of my body, the smile of my happiness, my comfort in dejection, the enlightener of my mind, my spur in work, the light of my eyes, the music of my ears, the breath of my life, the world to my touch! My present delight, the memory of my past, the hope of my future, my salvation in the next world! I am a swine—how should I recognize a pearl?"[247]
Thus thinking, Nagendra realized that he was to blame for everything. He was only thirty-three, yet he felt he had lost it all. God had given him everything that brings happiness—wealth, success, prosperity, and honor—all in abundance. Without wisdom, these meant nothing, yet God had given him that too generously. His parents had ensured he received a good education; who was as knowledgeable as he was? He had also been gifted with beauty, strength, health, and likability—nature had been generous to him. He even had a priceless gift, a loving and faithful wife; who on this earth possessed more of the elements of happiness? Who was more miserable than he was? If he could trade everything—wealth, honor, beauty, youth, knowledge, and intellect—for a life as one of his palanquin-bearers, he would have considered that a blessing. "But why just a bearer?" he thought; "Is there a single prisoner in this country's jails who isn’t[246] happier than I? More virtuous than I? They have killed others; I have killed Surja Mukhi. Had I controlled my desires, would she have met such a tragic end in an unfamiliar place? I am her murderer. What killer of a father, mother, or child is a greater sinner than I? Was Surja Mukhi just my wife? She was my everything. As a wife, she was my companion; as a friend, she was like a brother; as a caretaker, like a sister; generous in hospitality; as loving as a mother; devoted like a daughter; joyful like a friend; wise like a teacher; helpful as a servant! My Surja Mukhi! Who else has such a wife? A partner in daily life, a blessing in the household, a faith in my heart, a gem around my neck, the light of my eyes, the essence of my heart, the pulse of my life, the source of my happiness, my comfort in sorrow, the spark for my thoughts, my motivation in work, the beauty of my sight, the melody of my ears, the breath that sustains me, my world! The joy of my present, the memory of my past, the hope for my future, my salvation in the next life! I am a swine—how can I recognize a pearl?"[247]
Suddenly it occurred to him that he was being borne in a palanquin at his ease, while Surja Mukhi had worn herself out by travelling on foot. At this thought Nagendra leaped from the palanquin and proceeded on foot, his bearers carrying the empty vehicle in the rear. When he reached the bazaar where he had arrived in the morning he dismissed the men with their palanquin, resolving to finish his journey on foot.
Suddenly, he realized that he was being carried in a comfortable palanquin, while Surja Mukhi had exhausted herself by walking. With this thought in mind, Nagendra jumped out of the palanquin and started walking, leaving his bearers to carry the empty vehicle behind him. When he arrived at the marketplace where he had come in the morning, he dismissed the men with the palanquin, deciding to complete his journey on foot.
"I will devote my life to expiating the death of Surja Mukhi. What expiation? All the joys of which Surja Mukhi was deprived in leaving her home, I will henceforth give up. Wealth, servants, friends, none of these will I retain. I will subject myself to all the sufferings she endured. From the day I leave Govindpur I will go on foot, live upon rice, sleep beneath a tree or in a hut. What further expiation? Whenever I see a helpless woman I will serve her to the utmost of my power. Of the wealth I reserve to myself I will take only enough to sustain life; the rest I will devote to the service of helpless women. Even of that portion of my wealth that I give to Satish,[248] I will direct that half of it shall be devoted during my life to the support of destitute women. Expiation! Sin may be expiated, sorrow cannot be. The only expiation for sorrow is death. In dying, sorrow leaves you: why do I not seek that expiation?"
"I'll dedicate my life to making up for the death of Surja Mukhi. What do I mean by making up? I will give up all the joys that Surja Mukhi lost when she left her home. I won't keep any wealth, servants, or friends. I'll endure all the hardships she faced. From the moment I leave Govindpur, I'll walk everywhere, live on rice, and sleep under a tree or in a hut. What else will I do to make up for it? Whenever I see a helpless woman, I will do everything I can to help her. Of the wealth I keep for myself, I'll only take what's necessary to stay alive; I will use the rest to support helpless women. Even half of the money I give to Satish,[248] I will allocate during my lifetime to help destitute women. Making up! Sin can be atoned for, but sorrow cannot. The only way to atone for sorrow is through death. In dying, sorrow leaves you: so why don’t I seek that atonement?"
Then covering his face with his hands, and remembering his Creator, Nagendra Natha put from him the desire to seek death.
Then, covering his face with his hands and remembering his Creator, Nagendra Natha pushed away the desire to seek death.


CHAPTER XXXI.
THOUGH ALL ELSE DIES, SUFFERING DIES NOT.

rish Chandra was sitting alone in his boita khana one evening, when Nagendra entered, carpet-bag in hand, and throwing the bag to a distance, silently took a seat. Srish Chandra, seeing his distressed and wearied condition, was alarmed, but knew not how to ask an explanation. He knew that Nagendra had received the Brahmachari's letter at Benares, and had gone thence to Madhupur. As he saw that Nagendra would not begin to speak, Srish Chandra took his hand and said[250]—
Srish Chandra was sitting alone in his boita khana one evening when Nagendra walked in, carrying a carpet bag. He threw the bag aside and quietly took a seat. Srish Chandra noticed how distressed and exhausted Nagendra looked and felt alarmed, but didn’t know how to ask what was wrong. He was aware that Nagendra had received the Brahmachari's letter in Benares and had then traveled to Madhupur. Seeing that Nagendra wasn’t going to start talking, Srish Chandra took his hand and said[250]—
"Brother Nagendra, I am distressed to see you thus silent. Did you not go to Madhupur?"
"Brother Nagendra, I'm worried to see you so quiet. Didn't you go to Madhupur?"
Nagendra only said, "I went."
Nagendra just said, "I went."
"Did you not meet the Brahmachari?"
"Did you not meet the Brahmachari?"
"No."
"Nope."
"Did you find Surja Mukhi? Where is she?"
"Did you find Surja Mukhi? Where is she?"
Pointing upwards with his finger, Nagendra said, "In heaven."
Pointing up with his finger, Nagendra said, "In heaven."
Both sat silent for some moments; then Nagendra, looking up, said, "You do not believe in heaven. I do."
Both sat silent for a few moments; then Nagendra looked up and said, "You don't believe in heaven. I do."
Srish Chandra knew that formerly Nagendra had not believed in a heaven, and understood why he now did so—understood that this heaven was the creation of love.
Srish Chandra knew that Nagendra had previously not believed in heaven, and he understood why he did now—he understood that this heaven was created by love.
Not being able to endure the thought that Surja Mukhi no longer existed, he said to himself, "She is in heaven," and in this thought found comfort.
Not being able to bear the idea that Surja Mukhi was gone, he told himself, "She’s in heaven," and found solace in this thought.
Still they remained silent, for Srish Chandra felt that this was not the time to offer consolation; that words from others would be as poison, their society also. So he went away to prepare a[251] chamber for Nagendra. He did not venture to ask him to eat; he would leave that task to Kamal.
Still, they stayed quiet because Srish Chandra knew it wasn't the right moment to offer comfort; he felt that words from others would only make things worse, just like their society. So he left to set up a[251] room for Nagendra. He didn't dare to ask him to eat; he would leave that responsibility to Kamal.
But when Kamal Mani heard that Surja Mukhi was no more, she would undertake no duty. Leaving Satish Chandra, for that night she became invisible. The servants, seeing Kamal Mani bowed to the ground with hair unbound, left Satish and hurried to her. But Satish would not be left; he at first stood in silence by his weeping mother, and then, with his little finger under her chin, he tried to raise her face. Kamal looked up, but did not speak. Satish, wishing to comfort his mother, kissed her. Kamal caressed, but did not kiss him, nor did she speak. Satish put his hand on his mother's throat, crept into her lap, and began to cry. Except the Creator, who could enter into that child's heart and discern the cause of his crying?
But when Kamal Mani heard that Surja Mukhi was gone, she wouldn’t take on any responsibilities. Leaving Satish Chandra behind, she became invisible for the night. The servants, seeing Kamal Mani bent over with her hair down, abandoned Satish and rushed to her. But Satish wouldn’t leave; he initially stood in silence beside his grieving mother, and then, with his little finger under her chin, he tried to lift her face. Kamal looked up but didn't say anything. Satish, wanting to comfort his mother, kissed her. Kamal stroked his hair but didn’t kiss him or speak. Satish placed his hand on his mother's throat, climbed into her lap, and started to cry. Who but the Creator could understand the reason for that child's tears?
The unfortunate Srish Chandra, left to his own resources, took some food to Nagendra, who said: "I do not want food. Sit down, I have much to say to you; for that I came hither." He then[252] related all that he had heard from Ram Kristo Rai, and detailed his designs for the future.
The unfortunate Srish Chandra, left to his own devices, brought some food to Nagendra, who said, "I don’t want food. Sit down, I have a lot to tell you; that’s why I came here." He then[252] shared everything he had heard from Ram Kristo Rai and explained his plans for the future.
After listening to the narration, Srish Chandra said: "It is surprising that you should not have met the Brahmachari, as it is only yesterday he left Calcutta for Madhupur in search of you."
After listening to the story, Srish Chandra said: "It's surprising that you haven't met the Brahmachari, since he just left Calcutta for Madhupur yesterday looking for you."
"What?" said Nagendra; "how did you meet with the Brahmachari?"
"What?" said Nagendra. "How did you meet the Brahmachari?"
"He is a very noble person," answered Srish. "Not receiving a reply to his letter to you, he went to Govindpur in search of you. There he learned that his letter would be sent on to Benares. This satisfied him, and without remark to any one he went on his business to Purushuttam. Returning thence, he again went to Govindpur. Still hearing nothing of you, he was informed that I might have news. He came to me the next day, and I showed him your letter. Yesterday he started for Govindpur, expecting to meet you last night at Ranigunj."
"He’s a really honorable guy," Srish replied. "Not getting a response to his letter to you, he went to Govindpur looking for you. There, he found out that his letter would be forwarded to Benares. That reassured him, and without saying anything to anyone, he went about his business in Purushuttam. After that, he returned to Govindpur. Still having heard nothing about you, he learned that I might have information. He came to see me the next day, and I showed him your letter. Yesterday, he set out for Govindpur, hoping to meet you last night at Ranigunj."
"I was not at Ranigunj last night," said Nagendra. "Did he tell you anything of Surja Mukhi?"
"I wasn't in Ranigunj last night," said Nagendra. "Did he say anything about Surja Mukhi?"
"I will tell you all that to-morrow," said Srish.
"I'll tell you everything tomorrow," Srish said.
"You think my suffering will be increased by hearing it. Tell me all," entreated Nagendra.
"You think hearing it will only make my suffering worse. Please, tell me everything," pleaded Nagendra.
Then Srish Chandra repeated what the Brahmachari had told him of his meeting Surja Mukhi by the roadside, her illness, medical treatment, and improvement in health. Omitting many painful details, he concluded with the words: "Ram Kristo Kai did not relate all that Surja Mukhi had suffered."
Then Srish Chandra repeated what the Brahmachari had told him about his meeting Surja Mukhi by the roadside, her illness, medical treatment, and improvement in health. Leaving out many painful details, he ended with the words: "Ram Kristo Kai didn't mention everything that Surja Mukhi had gone through."
On hearing this, Nagendra rushed out of the house. Srish Chandra would have gone with him, but Nagendra would not allow it. The wretched man wandered up and down the road like a madman for hours. He wished to forget himself in the crowd, but at that time there was no crowd; and who can forget himself? Then he returned to the house, and sat down with Srish Chandra, to whom he said: "The Brahmachari must have learned from her where she went, and what she did. Tell me all he said to you."
On hearing this, Nagendra rushed out of the house. Srish Chandra would have gone with him, but Nagendra wouldn’t allow it. The miserable man wandered up and down the road like a madman for hours. He wanted to lose himself in the crowd, but there was no crowd at that time; and who can truly lose themselves? Eventually, he returned to the house and sat down with Srish Chandra, saying: "The Brahmachari must have learned from her where she went and what she did. Tell me everything he said to you."
"Why talk of it now?" said Srish; "take some rest."
"Why bring it up now?" Srish said. "Get some rest."
Nagendra frowned, and commanded Srish Chandra to speak.
Nagendra frowned and ordered Srish Chandra to speak.
Srish perceived that Nagendra had become like a madman. His face was dark as a thunder-cloud. Afraid to oppose him, he consented to speak, and Nagendra's face relaxed. He began—
Srish thought that Nagendra had gone completely crazy. His face was as dark as a storm cloud. Not wanting to argue with him, he agreed to talk, and Nagendra’s expression softened. He started—
"Walking slowly from Govindpur, Surja Mukhi came first in this direction."
"Walking slowly from Govindpur, Surja Mukhi came first this way."
"What distance did she walk daily?" interrupted Nagendra.
"What distance did she walk each day?" interrupted Nagendra.
"Two or three miles."
"2 or 3 miles."
"She did not take a farthing from home; how did she live?"
"She didn't take a penny from home; how did she survive?"
"Some days fasting, some days begging—are you mad?" with these words Srish Chandra threatened Nagendra, who had clutched at his own throat as though to strangle himself, saying—
"Some days you're fasting, some days you're begging—are you crazy?" With these words, Srish Chandra threatened Nagendra, who had grabbed at his own throat as if to choke himself, saying—
"If I die, shall I meet Surja Mukhi?"
"If I die, will I meet Surja Mukhi?"
Srish Chandra held the hands of Nagendra, who then desired him to continue his narrative.
Srish Chandra held Nagendra's hands, who then asked him to keep telling his story.
"If you will not listen calmly, I will tell you no more," said Srish.
"If you won't listen calmly, I won't say anything more," Srish said.
But Nagendra heard no more; he had lost consciousness. With closed eyes he sought the form of the heaven-ascended Surja Mukhi; he saw her seated as a queen upon a jewelled throne. The perfumed wind played in her hair, all around flower-like birds sang with the voice of the lute; at her feet bloomed hundreds of red water-lilies; in the canopy of her throne a hundred moons were shining, surrounded by hundreds of stars. He saw himself in a place full of darkness, pain in all his limbs, demons inflicting blows upon him, Surja Mukhi forbidding them with her outstretched finger.
But Nagendra heard nothing more; he had lost consciousness. With his eyes closed, he envisioned the heaven-ascended Surja Mukhi; he saw her sitting like a queen on a jeweled throne. The scented breeze danced in her hair, while flower-like birds sang melodiously around her, like stringed instruments; at her feet bloomed hundreds of red water-lilies; above her throne, a hundred moons shone, surrounded by countless stars. He found himself in a place of darkness, pain in every limb, demons striking him, Surja Mukhi warding them off with her outstretched finger.
With much difficulty Srish Chandra restored Nagendra to consciousness; whereupon Nagendra cried loudly—
With a lot of effort, Srish Chandra brought Nagendra back to consciousness; then Nagendra shouted loudly—
"Surja Mukhi, dearer to me than life, where art thou?"
"Surja Mukhi, you mean more to me than life itself. Where are you?"
At this cry, Srish Chandra, stupefied and frightened, sat down in silence.
At this shout, Srish Chandra, shocked and scared, sat down quietly.
At length, recovering his natural state, Nagendra said, "Speak."
At last, coming back to his normal self, Nagendra said, "Go ahead."
"What can I say?" asked Srish.
"What can I say?" asked Srish.
"Speak!" said Nagendra. "If you do not I shall die before your eyes."
"Speak!" Nagendra said. "If you don’t, I’ll die right in front of you."
Then Srish said: "Surja Mukhi did not endure this suffering many days. A wealthy Brahman, travelling with his family, had to come as far as Calcutta by boat, on his way to Benares. One day as Surja Mukhi was lying under a tree on the river's bank, the Brahman family came there to cook. The grihini entered into conversation with Surja Mukhi, and, pitying her condition, took her into the boat, as she had said that she also was going to Benares."
Then Srish said: "Surja Mukhi didn’t suffer like this for many days. A wealthy Brahmin traveling with his family had to reach Calcutta by boat on their way to Benares. One day, while Surja Mukhi was lying under a tree by the riverbank, the Brahmin family arrived there to cook. The grihini struck up a conversation with Surja Mukhi and, feeling sorry for her situation, invited her into the boat since she mentioned she was also going to Benares."
"What is the name of that Brahman? where does he live?" asked Nagendra, thinking that by some means he would find out the man and reward him. He then bade Srish Chandra continue.
"What’s the name of that Brahman? Where does he live?" asked Nagendra, thinking that somehow he would find the man and reward him. He then told Srish Chandra to continue.
"Surja Mukhi," continued Srish, "travelled as one of the family as far as Barhi; to Calcutta by boat, to Raniganj by rail, from Raniganj by bullock train—so far Surja Mukhi proceeded in comfort."
"Surja Mukhi," Srish continued, "traveled as part of the family all the way to Barhi; then to Calcutta by boat, to Raniganj by train, and from Raniganj by bullock cart—Surja Mukhi made it that far in comfort."
"After that did the Brahman dismiss her?" asked Nagendra.
"Did the Brahman let her go after that?" asked Nagendra.
"No," replied Srish; "Surja Mukhi herself took leave. She went no further than Benares. How many days could she go on without seeing you? With that purpose she returned from Barhi on foot."
"No," replied Srish; "Surja Mukhi herself took leave. She didn’t go any further than Benares. How many days could she go without seeing you? That’s why she came back from Barhi on foot."
As Srish Chandra spoke tears came into his eyes, the sight of which was an infinite comfort to Nagendra, who rested his head on the shoulder of Srish and wept. Since entering the house Nagendra had not wept, his grief had been beyond tears; but now the stream of sorrow found free vent. He cried like a boy, and his suffering was much lessened thereby. The grief that cannot weep is the messenger of death!
As Srish Chandra spoke, tears filled his eyes, which brought endless comfort to Nagendra, who leaned his head on Srish's shoulder and cried. Since arriving at the house, Nagendra hadn’t cried; his grief had been too deep for tears. But now, his sorrow flowed freely. He cried like a child, and this relief eased his suffering significantly. The grief that can't cry is a sign of death!
As Nagendra became calmer, Srish Chandra said, "We will speak no more of this to-day."
As Nagendra calmed down, Srish Chandra said, "We won't talk about this anymore today."
"What more is there to say?" said Nagendra. "The rest that happened I have seen with my own eyes. From Barhi she walked alone to Madhupur. From fatigue, fasting, sun, rain, despair, and grief, Surja Mukhi, seized by illness, fell to the ground ready to die."
"What else can I say?" Nagendra asked. "I've witnessed the rest myself. She walked alone from Barhi to Madhupur. Exhausted from fatigue, hunger, the sun, rain, despair, and grief, Surja Mukhi collapsed, stricken by illness, and was about to die."
Srish Chandra was silent for a time; at length[258] he said: "Brother, why dwell upon this an longer? You are not in fault; you did nothing to oppose or vex her. There is no cause to repent of that which has come about without fault of our own."
Srish Chandra was quiet for a while; finally[258] he said: "Brother, why keep thinking about this? You did nothing wrong; you didn’t try to upset her. There's no reason to regret what has happened through no fault of ours."
Nagendra did not understand. He knew himself to blame for all. Why had he not torn up the seed of the poison tree from his heart?
Nagendra didn't understand. He knew he was to blame for everything. Why hadn't he ripped out the seed of the poison tree from his heart?


CHAPTER XXXII.
THE FRUIT OF HIRA'S POISON TREE.

ira has sold her precious jewel in exchange for a cowrie. Virtue may be preserved with much pains for a long time; yet a day's carelessness may lose it. So it was with Hira. The wealth to gain which she had sold her precious jewel was but a broken shell; for such love as Debendra's is like the bore in the river, as muddy as transient. In three days the flood subsided, and Hira was left in the mud. As the miser, or the man greedy of fame, having long preserved his treasure, at the marriage of a son, or some other festival, spends[260] all in one day's enjoyment, Hira, who had so long preserved her chastity, had now lost it for a day's delight, and like the ruined miser was left standing in the path of endless regret.
Hira sold her precious jewel for a cowrie shell. Virtue can be maintained with a lot of effort for a long time, but just one day of carelessness can cause it to be lost. That’s what happened to Hira. The wealth she gained by selling her precious jewel was just a broken shell; Debendra’s love is as fleeting and murky as a river’s flood. In three days, the flood receded, leaving Hira in the mess. Just like a miser or someone who craves fame, who after hoarding their treasure for a long time, spends it all in one day of celebration for a son’s wedding or another event, Hira, who had long protected her chastity, lost it for a moment of pleasure and, like the ruined miser, found herself stuck in a cycle of endless regret.
Abandoned by Debendra, as a boy throws away an unripe mango not to his taste, Hira at first suffered frightfully. It was not only that she had been cast adrift by Debendra, but that, having been degraded and wounded by him, she had sunk to so low a position among women. It was this she found so unendurable. When, in her last interview, embracing Debendra's feet, she had said, "Do not cast me off!" he had replied, "It has only been in the hope of obtaining Kunda Nandini that I have honoured you so long. If you can secure me her society I will continue to live with you; otherwise not. I have given you the fitting reward of your pride; now, with the ink of this stain upon you, you may go home."
Abandoned by Debendra, like a boy tossing aside an unripe mango that doesn't taste good, Hira initially suffered terribly. It wasn't just that Debendra had left her, but that, having been humiliated and hurt by him, she had fallen to such a low place among women. This was what she found to be so unbearable. During their last meeting, while holding onto Debendra's feet, she pleaded, "Please don’t reject me!" He replied, "The only reason I've honored you for this long is because I hoped to win Kunda Nandini. If you can bring her to me, I'll stay with you; otherwise, I won't. I've given you the proper consequence for your arrogance; now, with this stain on you, you can go home."
Everything seemed dark around Hira in her anger. When her head ceased to swim she stood in front of Debendra, her brows knitted, her eyes inflamed, and as with a hundred tongues she[261] gave vent to her temper. Abuse such as the foulest women use she poured upon him, till he, losing patience, kicked her out of the pleasure-garden. Hira was a sinner; Debendra a sinner and a brute.
Everything felt dark around Hira in her anger. When her head finally cleared, she stood in front of Debendra, her brows furrowed and her eyes fiery, and with a multitude of words she[261] let loose her fury. She unleashed insults as harsh as those the worst women use, until he, losing his patience, kicked her out of the pleasure garden. Hira was a sinner; Debendra was a sinner and a brute.
Thus ended the promise of eternal love.
Thus ended the promise of everlasting love.
Hira, thus abused, did not go home. In Govindpur there was a low-caste doctor who attended only low-caste people. He had no knowledge of treatment or of drugs; he knew only the poisonous pills by which life is destroyed. Hira knew that for the preparation of these pills he kept vegetable, mineral, snake, and other life-destroying poisons. That night she went to his house, and calling him aside said—
Hira, feeling mistreated, did not return home. In Govindpur, there was a doctor from a low caste who only treated people from the lower castes. He had no real understanding of medicine or drugs; he only knew about the toxic pills that ruin lives. Hira was aware that he kept various life-threatening poisons, including plants, minerals, and snake venom, to make these pills. That night, she went to his house and pulled him aside, saying—
"I am troubled every day by a jackal who eats from my cooking-vessels. Unless I can kill this jackal I cannot remain here. If I mix some poison with the rice to-day he will eat it and die. You keep many poisons; can you sell me one that will instantly destroy life?"
"I’m bothered every day by a jackal that steals food from my pots. If I can’t get rid of this jackal, I can’t stay here. If I mix some poison with the rice today, he’ll eat it and die. You have a lot of poisons; can you sell me one that will kill instantly?"
The Chandal (outcast) did not believe the jackal story. He said[262]—
The Chandal (outcast) didn't buy the jackal story. He said[262]—
"I have what you want, but I cannot sell it. Should I be known to sell poison the police would seize me."
"I have what you want, but I can't sell it. If it got out that I was selling poison, the police would arrest me."
"Be not anxious about that," said Hira; "no one shall know that you have sold it. I will swear to you by my patron deity, and by the Ganges, if you wish. Give me enough to kill two jackals, and I will pay you fifty rupees."
"Don't worry about that," Hira said. "No one will find out that you sold it. I swear to you by my patron deity and by the Ganges, if you want. Give me enough to kill two jackals, and I'll pay you fifty rupees."
The Chandal felt certain that a murder was intended, but he could not resist the fifty rupees, and consented to sell the poison.
The Chandal was sure that a murder was planned, but he couldn't turn down the fifty rupees and agreed to sell the poison.
Hira fetched the money from her house and gave it to him. The Chandal twisted up a pungent life-destroying poison in paper, and gave it to her.
Hira took the money from her house and handed it to him. The Chandal rolled up a strong, toxic poison in paper and handed it to her.
In departing, Hira said, "Mind you betray this to no one, else we shall both suffer."
In leaving, Hira said, "Make sure you don’t tell anyone about this, or we’ll both pay the price."
The Chandal answered, "I do not even know you, mother."
The Chandal replied, "I don't even know you, mom."
Thus freed from fear, Hira went home. When there she held the poison in her hand, weeping bitterly; then, wiping her eyes, she said—
Thus free from fear, Hira went home. Once there, she held the poison in her hand, crying hard; then, wiping her eyes, she said—
"What fault have I committed that I should die? Why should I die without killing him who[263] has struck me? I will not take this poison. He who has reduced me to this condition shall eat it, or, if not, I will give it to his beloved Kunda Nandini. After one of these two are dead, if necessary I also will take it."
"What have I done to deserve death? Why should I die without taking out the one who[263] attacked me? I refuse to take this poison. The one who put me in this situation will have to drink it, or if not, I’ll give it to his beloved Kunda Nandini. After one of them is gone, if I have to, I’ll take it too."


CHAPTER XXXIII.
HIRA'S GRANDMOTHER.
With her teeth crushing pebbles.
Eating jackfruit by the hundred.

ira's grandmother hobbled along with the help of a stick, followed by boys reciting the above unrivalled verses, clapping their hands and dancing as they went. Whether any special taunt was meant by these verses is doubtful, but the old woman became furious, and desired the boys to go to destruction, wishing that their fathers[266] might eat refuse (a common form of abuse). This was a daily occurrence.
ira's grandmother hobbled along with the help of a cane, followed by boys reciting the unmatched verses, clapping their hands and dancing as they went. It's unclear if there was any specific insult intended by these verses, but the old woman became enraged and wished for the boys to meet a terrible fate, hoping that their fathers[266] would eat trash (a common insult). This happened every day.
Arriving at the door of Nagendra's house, the grandmother escaped from her enemies, who at sight of the fierce black moustaches of the durwans fled from the battlefield, one crying—
Arriving at the door of Nagendra's house, the grandmother escaped from her enemies, who at the sight of the fierce black mustaches of the durwans fled from the battlefield, one crying—
Hits the hay early,
"And when the thief shows up, he bolts."
Another—
Another one—
But when he sees a thief, he rushes to the tank.
A third—
A third—
Dances and sings energetically, Is death on the menu,
"But work isn't good."
The boys fled, attacked by the durwans with a shower of words not to be found in any dictionary.
The boys ran away, assaulted by the durwans with a barrage of words that you won’t find in any dictionary.
Hira's grandmother, plodding along, arrived at the dispensary attached to Nagendra's dwelling. Perceiving the doctor, she said, "Oh, father, [267]where is the doctor, father?"
Hira's grandmother, trudging along, reached the dispensary connected to Nagendra's house. Seeing the doctor, she asked, "Oh, father, [267]where is the doctor, father?"
"I am he."
"I'm him."
"Oh, father, I am getting blind. I am twenty-eight or eighty years old; how shall I speak of my troubles? I had a son; he is dead. I had a granddaughter; she also—" Here the old woman broke down, and began to whine like a cat.
"Oh, Dad, I’m losing my vision. I’m twenty-eight or eighty; how can I talk about my problems? I had a son; he’s gone. I had a granddaughter; she too—" Here the old woman broke down and started to whimper like a cat.
The doctor asked, "What has happened to you?"
The doctor asked, "What happened to you?"
Without answering this question, the woman began to relate the history of her life; and when, amid much crying, she had finished, the doctor again asked, "What do you want now? What has happened to you?" Again she began the unequalled story of her life; but the doctor showing much impatience, she changed it for that of Hira, of Hira's mother, and Hira's husband.
Without answering the question, the woman started to share her life story; and when she finished, amidst a lot of tears, the doctor asked again, "What do you want now? What happened to you?" She began to tell her incredible life story again, but seeing the doctor's impatience, she switched to talking about Hira, Hira's mother, and Hira's husband.
With much difficulty the doctor at last arrived at her meaning, to which all this talking and crying was quite irrelevant. The old woman desired some medicine for Hira. Her complaint, she said, was a species of lunacy. Before Hira's birth, her mother had been mad, had continued[268] so for some time, and had died in that condition. Hira had not hitherto shown any sign of her mother's disorder; but now the old woman felt some doubts about her. Hira would now laugh, now weep, now, closing the door, she would dance. Sometimes she screamed, and sometimes became unconscious. Therefore her grandmother wanted medicine for her. After some reflection the doctor said, "Your daughter has hysteria."
With a lot of effort, the doctor finally figured out what she meant, which made all the talking and crying seem pointless. The old woman wanted some medicine for Hira. She said Hira's issue was a kind of madness. Before Hira was born, her mother had been insane, had remained that way for a while, and had died in that state. Hira hadn't shown any signs of her mother's condition until now, but the old woman was starting to have doubts about her. Hira would laugh one moment, cry the next, and then, after closing the door, she'd dance around. Sometimes she would scream, and other times she would become unresponsive. That's why her grandmother wanted medicine for her. After thinking it over, the doctor said, "Your daughter has hysteria."
"Well, doctor, is there no medicine for that disease?"
"Well, doctor, is there no treatment for that illness?"
"Certainly there is: keep her very warm; take this dose of castor-oil, give it to her early to-morrow morning. Later I will come and give her another medicine."
"Of course there is: keep her really warm; give her this dose of castor oil, and make sure she takes it early tomorrow morning. I'll come by later to give her another medicine."
With the bottle of castor-oil in her hand, the old woman hobbled forth. On the road she was met by a neighbour, who said, "Oh, Hira's grandmother, what have you in your hand?"
With the bottle of castor oil in her hand, the old woman hobbled along. On the road, she ran into a neighbor, who asked, "Oh, Hira's grandmother, what do you have in your hand?"
The old woman answered, "Hira has become hysterical; the doctor has given me some castor-oil for her; do you think that will be good for hysterics?"[269]
The old woman replied, "Hira has become hysterical; the doctor gave me some castor oil for her; do you think that will help with hysteria?"[269]
"It may be; castor-oil is the god of all. But what has made your granddaughter so jolly lately?"
"It might be; castor oil is the king of everything. But what’s made your granddaughter so cheerful lately?"
After much reflection the old woman said, "It is the fault of her age;" whereupon the neighbour prescribed a remedy, and they parted.
After thinking it over, the old woman said, "It's her age that's the problem;" then the neighbor suggested a solution, and they went their separate ways.
On arriving at home, the old woman remembered that the doctor had said Hira must be kept warm; therefore she placed a pan of fire before her granddaughter.
On getting home, the old woman remembered that the doctor had said Hira needed to stay warm; so she set a pan of fire in front of her granddaughter.
"Fire!" exclaimed Hira. "What is this for?"
"Fire!" shouted Hira. "What's this for?"
"The doctor told me to keep you warm," replied the old woman.
"The doctor said to keep you warm," replied the old woman.


CHAPTER XXXIV.
A DARK HOUSE: A DARK LIFE.

n the absence of Nagendra and Surja Mukhi from their spacious home, all was darkness therein. The clerks sat in the office, and Kunda Nandini dwelt in the inner apartments with the poor relations. But how can stars dispel the darkness of a moonless night?
In the absence of Nagendra and Surja Mukhi from their spacious home, everything was dark inside. The clerks were in the office, and Kunda Nandini stayed in the inner rooms with the poor relatives. But how can stars light up the darkness of a moonless night?
In the corners hung spiders' webs; in the rooms stood dust in heaps; pigeons built their nests in the cornices and sparrows in the beams. Heaps of withered leaves lay rotting in the garden; weeds grew over the tanks; the flower-beds were hidden[272] by jungle. There were jackals in the court-yard, and rats in the granary; mould and fungus were everywhere to be seen; musk-rats and centipedes swarmed in the rooms; bats flew about night and day. Nearly all Surja Mukhi's pet birds had been eaten by cats; their soiled feathers lay scattered around. The ducks had been killed by the jackals, the peacocks had flown into the woods; the cows had become emaciated, and no longer gave milk. Nagendra's dogs had no spirit left in them, they neither played nor barked; they were never let loose; some had died, some had gone mad, some had escaped. The horses were diseased, or had become ill from want of work; the stables were littered with stubble, grass, and feathers. The horses were sometimes fed, sometimes neglected. The grooms were never to be found in the stables. The cornice of the house was broken in places, as were the sashes, the shutters, and the railings. The matting was soaked with rain; there was dust on the painted walls. Over the bookcases were the dwellings of insects; straws from the sparrows' nests on the glass of the chandeliers.[273] In the house there was no mistress, and without a mistress paradise itself would be a ruin.
In the corners, spider webs hung; in the rooms, dust piled up; pigeons nested in the cornices and sparrows in the beams. Piles of withered leaves rotted in the garden; weeds overtook the tanks; the flower beds were hidden[272] by thick underbrush. There were jackals in the courtyard, and rats in the granary; mold and fungus were everywhere; musk-rats and centipedes swarmed in the rooms; bats flew around day and night. Most of Surja Mukhi's pet birds had been eaten by cats; their soiled feathers were scattered everywhere. The ducks had been killed by the jackals, the peacocks had fled to the woods; the cows had become thin and no longer produced milk. Nagendra's dogs were lifeless, neither playing nor barking; they were never let loose; some had died, some had gone mad, some had escaped. The horses were sick or had become ill from lack of work; the stables were filled with straw, grass, and feathers. The horses were sometimes fed, sometimes neglected. The grooms were never found in the stables. The cornice of the house was damaged in places, as were the sashes, shutters, and railings. The matting was soaked from rain; dust covered the painted walls. Insects inhabited the bookcases; straws from the sparrows' nests stuck to the glass of the chandeliers.[273] In the house, there was no mistress, and without a mistress, paradise itself would be a wreck.
As in an untended garden overgrown with grass a single rose or lily will bloom, so in this house Kunda Nandini lived alone. Wherever a few joined in a meal Kunda partook of it. If any one addressed her as house-mistress, Kunda thought, "They are mocking me." If the Dewan sent to ask her about anything her heart beat with fear. There was a reason for this. As Nagendra did not write to Kunda, she had been accustomed to send to the Dewan for the letters received by him. She did not return the letters, and she lived in fear that the Dewan would claim them; and in fact the man no longer sent them to her, but only suffered her to read them as he held them in his hand.
As in an unkempt garden where a single rose or lily blooms amidst overgrown grass, Kunda Nandini lived alone in this house. Whenever a few people gathered for a meal, Kunda joined in. If anyone called her the house-mistress, Kunda thought, "They must be making fun of me." When the Dewan asked her about anything, her heart raced with fear. There was a reason for this. Since Nagendra didn't write to Kunda, she had gotten used to asking the Dewan for the letters he received. She never returned the letters, and she lived in constant fear that the Dewan would demand them back; in fact, he had stopped sending them to her altogether and only allowed her to read them while he held them in his hand.
The suffering felt by Surja Mukhi was endured in equal measure by Kunda Nandini. Surja Mukhi loved her husband; did not Kunda love him? In that little heart there was inexhaustible love, and because it could find no expression, like obstructed breathing it wounded her heart. From childhood, before her first marriage, Kunda had loved Na[274]gendra; she had told no one, no one knew it. She had had no desire to obtain Nagendra, no hope of doing so; her despair she had borne in silence. To have striven for it would have been like striving to reach the moon in the sky. Now where was that moon? For what fault had Nagendra thrust her from him? Kunda revolved these thoughts in her mind night and day; night and day she wept. Well! let Nagendra not love her. It was her good fortune to love him. Why might she not even see him? Nor that only: he regarded Kunda as the root of his troubles; every one considered her so. Kunda thought, "Why should I be blamed for all this?"
The pain Surja Mukhi felt was equally shared by Kunda Nandini. Surja Mukhi loved her husband; didn’t Kunda love him too? In that small heart, there was endless love, and because it had no way to express itself, like struggling to breathe, it hurt her heart. Since childhood, even before her first marriage, Kunda had loved Nagendra; she had never told anyone, and no one knew. She never wanted to get Nagendra, nor did she hope for it; she bore her despair in silence. Trying for it would have been like trying to reach the moon in the sky. Now where was that moon? For what reason had Nagendra pushed her away? Kunda turned these thoughts over in her mind day and night; she wept day and night. Well! Let Nagendra not love her. It was her blessing to love him. Why couldn’t she even see him? Not only that: he saw Kunda as the source of his problems; everyone else thought so too. Kunda wondered, "Why should I be blamed for all this?"
In an evil moment Nagendra had married Kunda. As every one who sits under the upas-tree must die, so every one who had been touched by the shadow of this marriage was ruined.
In a moment of weakness, Nagendra married Kunda. Just as everyone who sits under the upas tree is doomed to die, anyone who was affected by the shadow of this marriage faced destruction.
Then again Kunda thought, "Surja Mukhi has come to this condition through me. Surja Mukhi protected me, loved me as a sister; I have made her a beggar by the roadside. Who is there more unfortunate than I? Why did I not die by[275] the roadside? Why do I not die now? I will not die now; let him come, let me see him again. Will he not come?" Kunda had not received the news of Surja Mukhi's death, therefore she thought, "What is the use of dying now? Should Surja Mukhi return, then I will die; I will no longer be a thorn in her path."
Then Kunda thought again, "Surja Mukhi ended up like this because of me. Surja Mukhi protected me and loved me like a sister; I’ve turned her into a beggar on the street. Who is more unfortunate than I am? Why didn’t I die by[275] the roadside? Why don’t I die now? I won’t die now; let him come, let me see him again. Will he not come?" Kunda hadn’t heard about Surja Mukhi’s death, so she thought, "What’s the point of dying now? If Surja Mukhi comes back, then I’ll die; I won’t be a burden to her anymore."


CHAPTER XXXV.
THE RETURN.

he work required to be done in Calcutta was finished. The deed of gift was drawn up. In it special rewards were indicated for the Brahmachari and the unknown Brahman. The deed would have to be registered at Haripur, therefore Nagendra went to Govindpur, taking it with him. He had instructed his brother-in-law to follow. Srish Chandra had striven to prevent his executing this deed, also to restrain him from making the journey on foot, but in vain. His efforts thus defeated, he followed by boat; and as[278] Kamal Mani could not endure to be parted from her husband, she and Satish simply accompanied him without asking any questions.
The work that needed to be done in Calcutta was complete. The deed of gift was prepared. It specified special rewards for the Brahmachari and the unknown Brahman. The deed had to be registered in Haripur, so Nagendra went to Govindpur with it. He had asked his brother-in-law to follow him. Srish Chandra had tried to stop him from executing this deed and also to keep him from traveling on foot, but it was all futile. With his efforts failing, he followed by boat; and since Kamal Mani couldn't bear to be away from her husband, she and Satish simply accompanied him without asking any questions.
When Kunda saw Kamal Mani she thought that once more a star had risen in the sky. Since the flight of Surja Mukhi, Kamal's anger against Kunda had been inflexible; she had always refused to see her. But now, at the sight of Kunda's emaciated figure, Kamal's anger departed. She endeavoured to cheer her with the news that Nagendra was coming, which brought a smile to the girl's face; but at the news of Surja Mukhi's death Kunda Nandini wept.
When Kunda saw Kamal Mani, she felt like a star had risen in the sky once again. Since the departure of Surja Mukhi, Kamal had been unwavering in her anger toward Kunda; she had always refused to see her. But now, seeing Kunda’s frail figure, Kamal's anger faded away. She tried to lift Kunda's spirits with the news that Nagendra was coming, which brought a smile to Kunda’s face; but when she heard about Surja Mukhi's death, Kunda Nandini broke down in tears.
Many fair readers will smile at this, thinking, "The cat weeps over the death of the fish." But Kunda was very stupid; that she had cause to rejoice never entered her head: this silly woman actually cried over her rival's death.
Many fair readers will smile at this, thinking, "The cat is sad about the fish's death." But Kunda was very foolish; the idea that she had a reason to be happy never crossed her mind: this foolish woman actually cried over her rival's death.
Kamal Mani not only cheered Kunda, she herself felt comforted. She had already wept much, and now she began to think, "What is the use of weeping? If I do, Srish Chandra will be miserable and Satish will cry. Weeping will not bring back[279] Surja Mukhi." So she gave up weeping, and became her natural self.
Kamal Mani not only supported Kunda, but she also felt reassured herself. She had already cried a lot, and now she started to ponder, "What's the point of crying? If I do, Srish Chandra will be upset and Satish will cry too. Crying won’t bring back [279] Surja Mukhi." So she stopped crying and returned to her true self.
Kamal Mani said to Srish Chandra, "The goddess of this paradise has abandoned it; when my brother comes he will have only a bed of straw to lie upon." They resolved to put the place in order; so the coolies, the lamp cleaners, and the gardeners were set to work. Under Kamal Mani's vigorous treatment the musk-rats, bats, and mice, departed squeaking; the pigeons flew from cornice to cornice; the sparrows fled in distress. Where the windows were closed, the sparrows, taking them for open doorways, pecked at them with their beaks till they were ready to drop. The women-servants, broom in hand, were victorious everywhere. Before long the place again wore a smiling appearance, and at length Nagendra arrived.
Kamal Mani said to Srish Chandra, "The goddess of this paradise has left; when my brother arrives, he's going to have nothing but a bed of straw to sleep on." They decided to tidy up the place; so the coolies, lamp cleaners, and gardeners got to work. Under Kamal Mani's firm supervision, the musk-rats, bats, and mice scampered away; the pigeons flew from ledge to ledge; the sparrows darted away in panic. Where the windows were shut, the sparrows, mistaking them for open doors, pecked at the glass until they were about to drop. The women-servants, broom in hand, were cleaning up everywhere. Before long, the place looked cheerful again, and eventually, Nagendra arrived.
It was evening. As a river courses swiftly when at flood, but at ebb the deep water is calm, so Nagendra's violent grief was now changed into a quiet gravity. His sorrow was not lessened, but he was no longer restless. In a quiet manner he conversed with the household, making inquiries[280] from each one. In the presence of none of them did he mention the name of Surja Mukhi, but all were grieved at the sorrow expressed by his grave countenance. The old servants, saluting him, went aside and wept. One person only did Nagendra wound. With the long-sorrowing Kunda he did not speak.
It was evening. Just like a river flows quickly during a flood but is calm at low tide, Nagendra's intense grief had now settled into a quiet seriousness. His sorrow hadn't decreased, but he was no longer anxious. He spoke calmly with the household, asking questions[280] of each person. He didn't mention Surja Mukhi's name in front of anyone, but they all felt sad seeing the sorrow etched on his face. The old servants, bowing to him, stepped aside to cry. There was only one person Nagendra hurt. He didn't speak to Kunda, who had been grieving for a long time.
By the orders of Nagendra the servants prepared his bed in Surja Mukhi's room. At this order Kamal Mani shook her head. At midnight, when all the household had retired, Nagendra went to Surja Mukhi's chamber, not to lie down, but to weep. Surja Mukhi's room was spacious and beautiful; it was the temple of all Nagendra's joys, therefore he had adorned it with care. The room was wide and lofty, the floor inlaid with white and black marble, the walls painted in floral designs, blue, yellow, and red. Above the flowers hovered various birds. On one side stood a costly bedstead, beautifully carved and inlaid with ivory; elsewhere, seats in variously coloured coverings, a large mirror, and other suitable furniture. Some pictures, not English, hung upon the walls. Surja[281] Mukhi and Nagendra together had chosen the subjects, and caused them to be painted by a native artist, who had been taught by an Englishman, and could draw well. Nagendra had framed the pictures handsomely, and hung them on the walls. One picture was taken from the Birth of Kartika: Siva, sunk in meditation, on the summit of the hill; Nandi at the door of the arbour. On the left Hembatra, finger on lip, is hushing the sounds of the garden. All is still, the bees hid among the leaves, the deer reposing. At this moment Madan (Cupid) enters to interrupt the meditation of Siva; with him comes Spring. In advance, Parvati, wreathed with flowers, has come to salute Siva. Uma's joyous face is bent in salutation, one knee resting on the earth. This is the position depicted in the painting. As she bends her head, one or two flowers escape from the wreaths fastened in her hair. In the distance Cupid, half hidden by the woods, one knee touching earth, his beauteous bow bent, is fitting to it the flower-wreathed arrow.
By Nagendra's orders, the servants set up his bed in Surja Mukhi's room. At this command, Kamal Mani shook her head. At midnight, when everyone else in the house had gone to sleep, Nagendra entered Surja Mukhi's chamber, not to rest but to cry. Surja Mukhi's room was spacious and gorgeous; it was where all of Nagendra's happiness resided, so he had decorated it with care. The room was wide and tall, with the floor inlaid in white and black marble, and the walls painted with floral designs in blue, yellow, and red. Above the flowers, various birds were portrayed. On one side stood an expensive bedframe, beautifully carved and inlaid with ivory; elsewhere, there were seats with colorful coverings, a large mirror, and other appropriate furniture. Some pictures, not English, hung on the walls. Surja Mukhi and Nagendra had together chosen the themes and had them painted by a local artist, who had been trained by an Englishman and was skilled in drawing. Nagendra had framed the pictures elegantly and hung them on the walls. One picture depicted the Birth of Kartika: Siva, deep in meditation, on the hilltop; Nandi by the door of the bower. On the left, Hembatra, with a finger on his lips, is quieting the garden sounds. Everything is silent, the bees hidden among the leaves, the deer resting. At that moment, Madan (Cupid) comes in to disturb Siva's meditation; with him arrives Spring. Ahead, Parvati, adorned with flowers, has come to greet Siva. Uma's joyful face bows in respect, one knee on the ground. This is how she is portrayed in the painting. As she lowers her head, a few flowers fall from the wreaths secured in her hair. In the distance, Cupid, partially concealed by the trees, kneels on the ground, his beautiful bow drawn, readying the flower-crowned arrow.
In another picture, Ram, returning from Lanka[282] with Janaki, both sitting in a jewelled chariot, is coursing through the sky. Ram has one hand on the shoulders of Janaki, with the other is pointing out the beauties of the earth below. Around the chariot many-coloured clouds, blue, red, and white, sail past in purple waves. Below, the broad blue ocean heaves its billows, shining like heaps of diamonds in the sun's rays. In the distance, opal-crowned Lanka, its rows of palaces like golden peaks in the sun's light; the opposite shore beautiful with tamal and palm trees. In the mid distance flocks of swans are flying.
In another scene, Ram is returning from Lanka[282] with Janaki, both sitting in a jeweled chariot as they soar through the sky. Ram has one hand on Janaki's shoulder while the other points out the beautiful landscapes below. Around the chariot, colorful clouds—blue, red, and white—drift by in purple waves. Below, the vast blue ocean rises and falls, sparkling like piles of diamonds in the sunlight. In the distance, the opal-crowned Lanka stands, its rows of palaces shining like golden peaks in the sun; the opposite shore is stunning with tamala and palm trees. In the mid-distance, flocks of swans are flying.
Another picture represents Subhadra with Arjuna in the chariot. Countless Yadav soldiers, their flags streaming out against the gloomy sky, are running after the chariot. Subhadra herself is driving, the horses grinding the clouds with their hoofs. Subhadra, proud of her skill, is looking round towards Arjuna, biting her lower lip with her ivory teeth, her hair streaming in the chariot-created wind; two or three braids moistened with perspiration lie in a curve on her temples.
Another image shows Subhadra with Arjuna in the chariot. Countless Yadav soldiers, their flags flying wildly in the dark sky, are chasing after the chariot. Subhadra is driving, the horses pounding the clouds with their hooves. Proud of her skill, she glances over at Arjuna, biting her lower lip with her white teeth, her hair blowing in the wind created by the chariot; two or three braids damp with sweat are draped against her temples.
In another, Sakuntala, with the desire of seeing[283] Dushmanta, is pretending to take a thorn from her foot. Anasuya and Priamboda are smiling. Sakuntala, between anger and shame will not raise her face. She cannot look at Dushmanta, nor yet can she leave the spot.
In another moment, Sakuntala, eager to see[283] Dushmanta, is pretending to remove a thorn from her foot. Anasuya and Priamboda are smiling. Sakuntala, caught between anger and embarrassment, won't lift her gaze. She can't look at Dushmanta, yet she can't bring herself to leave the spot.
In another, Prince Abhimaya, armed for battle, and, like the young lion, eager for glory, is taking leave of Uttora that he may go to the field. Uttora, saying that she will not let him go, is standing against the closed door weeping, with her hands over her eyes.
In another scene, Prince Abhimaya, ready for battle and, like a young lion, eager for glory, is saying goodbye to Uttora before heading to the battlefield. Uttora, refusing to let him leave, stands against the closed door, crying with her hands covering her eyes.
It was past twelve when Nagendra entered the room. The night was fearful. Late in the evening some rain had fallen; now the wind had risen and was blowing fiercely, the rain continuing at intervals. Wherever the shutters were not fastened they flapped to and fro with the noise of thunder-claps, the sashes rattling continuously. When Nagendra closed the door the noise was less noticeable. There was another door near the bedstead, but as the wind did not blow in that direction he left it open. Nagendra sat on the sofa, weeping bitterly. How often had he sat there[284] with Surja Mukhi; what pleasant talks they had had! Again and again Nagendra embraced that senseless seat; then raising his face he looked at the pictures so dear to Surja Mukhi. In the fitful light of the lamp the figures in the pictures seemed to be alive; in each picture Nagendra saw Surja Mukhi. He remembered that one day she expressed a wish to be decked with flowers like Uma in the picture. He had gone forth, brought in flowers from the garden, and with them decked her person. What beauty decked with jewels had ever felt the pleasure felt by Surja Mukhi at that moment? Another day she had desired to drive Nagendra's carriage in imitation of Subhadra; whereupon he had brought a small carriage drawn by ponies to the inner garden. They both got in, Surja Mukhi taking the reins; like Subhadra, she turned her face towards Nagendra, biting her lower lip and laughing. The ponies, taking advantage of her inattention, went through an open gate into the road. Then Surja Mukhi, afraid of being seen by the people, drew her sari over her face, and Nagendra, seeing her distress, took the[285] reins and brought the carriage back into the garden. They went into the chamber laughing over the adventure, and Surja Mukhi shook her fist at Subhadra in the picture, saying, "You are the cause of this misfortune."
It was after midnight when Nagendra walked into the room. The night was terrifying. Earlier in the evening, it had rained; now the wind had picked up and was howling fiercely, with rain falling intermittently. Wherever the shutters weren’t secured, they flapped back and forth like thunder, and the window sashes rattled nonstop. When Nagendra shut the door, the noise became less noticeable. There was another door by the bed, but since the wind wasn’t blowing that way, he left it open. Nagendra sat on the sofa, crying bitterly. How many times had he sat there[284] with Surja Mukhi; they had such lovely conversations! Again and again Nagendra embraced that empty seat; then, lifting his face, he looked at the pictures so cherished by Surja Mukhi. In the flickering light of the lamp, the figures in the pictures seemed alive; in each one, Nagendra saw Surja Mukhi. He recalled that one day she had wished to be adorned with flowers like Uma in the painting. He had gone out, picked flowers from the garden, and adorned her with them. What jewel-adorned beauty had ever felt the joy that Surja Mukhi felt at that moment? Another time, she had wanted to drive Nagendra’s carriage like Subhadra; so he had brought a small carriage pulled by ponies to the inner garden. They both climbed in, with Surja Mukhi taking the reins; like Subhadra, she turned to Nagendra, biting her lower lip and laughing. The ponies, seizing the moment, dashed through an open gate onto the road. Then Surja Mukhi, afraid of being seen by anyone, pulled her sari over her face, and seeing her panic, Nagendra took the[285] reins and steered the carriage back into the garden. They strolled back into the room, laughing over the adventure, and Surja Mukhi shook her fist at Subhadra in the picture, saying, "You’re the reason for this trouble."
How bitterly Nagendra wept over this remembrance! Unable longer to endure his suffering he walked about; but look where he would there were signs of Surja Mukhi. On the wall where the artist had drawn twining plants she had sketched a copy of one of them; the sketch remained there still. One day during the Dol festival she had thrown a ball of red powder at her husband; she had missed her aim and struck the wall, where still the stain was visible. When the room was finished, Surja Mukhi had written in one spot—
How painfully Nagendra cried over this memory! Unable to bear his suffering any longer, he walked around; but no matter where he looked, there were reminders of Surja Mukhi. On the wall where the artist had drawn intertwining plants, she had sketched one of them; the sketch was still there. One day during the Dol festival, she had thrown a ball of red powder at her husband; she missed and hit the wall, where the stain was still visible. When the room was done, Surja Mukhi had written in one place—
"In the year 1910 of Vikramaditya
This room was prepared
For my Guardian Deity, my husband,
By his servant
"In the year 1910 of Vikramaditya
This room is ready
For my Guardian Deity, my husband,
By his assistant
Surja Mukhi."
Surja Mukhi.
Nagendra read this inscription repeatedly. He[286] could not satisfy his desire to read it. Though the tears filled his eyes so that he could not see, he would not desist. As he read he perceived the light becoming dim, and found the lamp ready to expire. With a sigh he laid down; but scarcely had he done so ere the wind began to rage furiously. The lamp, void of oil, was on the point of extinction, only a faint spark like that of a firefly remained. In that dim light a remarkable circumstance occurred. Astonished by the noise of the shutters, Nagendra looked towards the door near the bed. In that open doorway, shown by the dim light, a shadowy form appeared. The shape was that of a woman; but what he saw further made his hair stand on end, he trembled from head to foot. The woman's face had the features of Surja Mukhi! Nagendra started to his feet and hastened to the figure. But the light went out, the form became invisible; with a loud cry Nagendra fell senseless to the ground.
Nagendra read the inscription over and over again. He[286] couldn’t satisfy his urge to read it. Although his eyes were filled with tears so he could barely see, he didn’t stop. As he read, he noticed the light getting dimmer and realized the lamp was about to go out. With a sigh, he lay down; but as soon as he did, the wind started to blow furiously. The lamp, empty of oil, was on the verge of going out, with only a faint spark left, like that of a firefly. In that dim light, something extraordinary happened. Startled by the noise of the shutters, Nagendra glanced toward the door near the bed. In that open doorway, illuminated by the faint light, a shadowy figure appeared. It was the shape of a woman; but what he saw next made his hair stand on end, and he trembled all over. The woman's face bore the features of Surja Mukhi! Nagendra jumped to his feet and rushed toward the figure. But the light went out, and the figure vanished; with a loud cry, Nagendra collapsed to the ground, unconscious.
When Nagendra recovered consciousness thick darkness filled the room. By degrees he collected his senses. As he remembered what had caused[287] the swoon, surprise was added to surprise. He had fallen senseless on the floor, then whence came the pillow on which his head was resting? Was it a pillow? or was it the lap of some one—of Kunda Nandini?
When Nagendra came to, the room was engulfed in thick darkness. Gradually, he regained his senses. As he recalled what had led to his fainting, his surprise grew even more. He had collapsed on the floor, so where did this pillow under his head come from? Was it really a pillow, or was it someone's lap—Kunda Nandini's?
To solve his doubt he said, "Who are you?" But the supporter of his head made no reply. Only a hot drop or two fell on his forehead, by which he understood that the person was weeping. He tried to identify the person by touch. Suddenly he became quite bewildered; he remained motionless for some moments, then with labouring breath raised his head and sat up. The rain had ceased, the clouds had disappeared, light began to peep into the room. Nagendra rose and seated himself. He perceived that the woman had also risen, and was slowly making towards the door. Then Nagendra guessed that it was not Kunda Nandini. There was not light enough to recognize any one, but something might be guessed from form and gait. Nagendra studied these for a moment, then falling at the feet of the standing figure, in troubled tones he said[288]—
To clear his confusion, he asked, "Who are you?" But the person supporting his head said nothing. Only a couple of hot tears fell on his forehead, making him realize that the person was crying. He tried to feel who it was. Suddenly, he felt completely lost; he stayed still for a few moments, then with labored breathing, he lifted his head and sat up. The rain had stopped, the clouds had vanished, and light started to filter into the room. Nagendra got up and sat down. He noticed that the woman had also stood up and was slowly moving toward the door. Then Nagendra guessed it wasn’t Kunda Nandini. There wasn’t enough light to recognize anyone, but he could make some guesses based on form and movement. Nagendra focused on these for a moment, then, falling at the feet of the standing figure, he said in troubled tones[288]—
"Whether thou art a god or a human being, I am at thy feet; speak to me, or I shall die!"
"Whether you are a god or a human, I am at your feet; speak to me, or I will die!"
What the woman said he could not understand, but no sooner had the sound of her voice entered his ear than he sprang to his feet and tried to grasp the form. But mind and body again became benumbed, and, like the creeper from the tree, he sank at the feet of the enchantress; he could not speak. Again the woman, sitting down, took his head upon her lap. When Nagendra once more recovered from stupor it was day. The birds were singing in the adjacent garden. The rays of the newly risen sun were shining into the room. Without raising his eyes Nagendra said—
What the woman said was unclear to him, but as soon as he heard her voice, he jumped to his feet and tried to reach out to her. But his mind and body froze up again, and like a vine falling from a tree, he collapsed at the feet of the enchantress; he couldn't speak. Once more, the woman sat down and rested his head in her lap. When Nagendra finally came out of his daze, it was daytime. Birds were singing in the nearby garden. The rays of the newly risen sun were streaming into the room. Without looking up, Nagendra said—
"Kunda, when did you come? This whole night I have been dreaming of Surja Mukhi. In my dream I saw myself with my head on Surja Mukhi's lap. If you could be Surja Mukhi, how joyful it would be!"
"Kunda, when did you arrive? I’ve been dreaming about Surja Mukhi all night. In my dream, I saw myself resting my head on Surja Mukhi's lap. If you could be Surja Mukhi, how happy I would be!"
The woman answered, "If it would delight you so much to see that unhappy being, then I am she."
The woman replied, "If it would make you so happy to see that unhappy person, then I am that person."
Nagendra started up, wiped his eyes, sat hold[289]ing his temples, again rubbed his eyes and gazed; then bowing his head, he said in a low voice—
Nagendra jumped up, wiped his eyes, sat down while holding his temples, rubbed his eyes again, and stared; then, bowing his head, he spoke in a soft voice—
"Am I demented, or is Surja Mukhi living? Is this the end of my destiny, that I should go mad?"
"Am I losing my mind, or is Surja Mukhi alive? Is this how my fate ends, driving me to madness?"
Then the woman, clasping his feet, wept over them, saying, "Arise, arise, my all! I have suffered so much. To-day all my sorrow is ended. I am not dead. Again I have come to serve you."
Then the woman, holding onto his feet, cried over them, saying, "Get up, get up, my everything! I've been through so much. Today all my pain is over. I'm not gone. I've come back to serve you again."
Could delusion last longer? Nagendra embraced Surja Mukhi, and laid his head upon her breast. Together they wept; but how joyous was that weeping!
Could delusion last longer? Nagendra hugged Surja Mukhi and rested his head on her chest. They cried together; but oh, how joyful was that crying!


CHAPTER XXXVI.
EXPLANATION.

n due time Surja Mukhi satisfied Nagendra's inquiries, saying—
In due time, Surja Mukhi answered Nagendra's questions, saying—
"I did not die. What the Kabiraj said of my dying was not true. He did not know. When I had become strong through his treatment, I was extremely anxious to come to Govindpur to see you. I teased the Brahmachari till he consented to take me. On arriving here, we learned you were not in the place. The Brahmachari took me to a spot six miles from here, placed me in the house of a Brahmin to attend on his daughter, and then went in[292] search of you: first to Calcutta, where he had an interview with Srish Chandra, from whom he heard that you were gone to Madhupur. At that place he learned that on the day we left Haro Mani's house it was burned, and Haro Mani in it. In the morning people could not recognize the body. They reasoned that as of the two people in the house one was sick and one was well, that the former could not have escaped from want of strength; therefore that Haro Mani must have escaped and the dead person must be myself. What was at first a supposition became established by report. Ram Krishna heard the report, and repeated it to you. The Brahmachari heard all this, and also that you had been there, had heard of my death, and had come hither. He came after you, arriving last night at Protappur. I also heard that in a day or two you were expected home. In that belief I came here the day before yesterday. It does not trouble me now to walk a few miles. As you had not come I went back, saw the Brahmachari, and returned yesterday, arriving at one this morning. The window being[293] open, I entered the house and hid under the stairs without being seen. When all slept I ascended; I thought you would certainly sleep in this room. I peeped in, and saw you sitting with your head in your hands. I longed to throw myself at your feet, but I feared you would not forgive my sin against you, so I refrained. From within the window I looked, thinking, 'Now I will let him see me.' I came in, but you fell senseless, and since then I have sat with your head on my lap. I knew not that such joy was in my destiny. But, fie! you love me not; when you put your hand upon me you did not recognize me! I should have known you by your breath."
"I didn’t die. What the Kabiraj said about my dying wasn’t true. He didn’t know. Once I got stronger from his treatment, I was really eager to come to Govindpur to see you. I bugged the Brahmachari until he agreed to take me. When we got here, we found out you weren’t around. The Brahmachari took me to a place six miles away, put me in the house of a Brahmin to help out with his daughter, and then went off[292] searching for you: first to Calcutta, where he talked to Srish Chandra, who told him you had gone to Madhupur. There, he learned that on the day we left Haro Mani’s house, it was burned down, with Haro Mani inside. In the morning, people couldn’t recognize the body. They figured that since there were two people in the house—one was sick and one was well—the sick one couldn’t have escaped because they didn’t have the strength; therefore, Haro Mani must have escaped and the dead person must have been me. What started as a guess became accepted as fact. Ram Krishna heard the report and repeated it to you. The Brahmachari heard all this, along with the news that you had been there, learned of my death, and had come here. He followed after you, arriving last night at Protappur. I also heard that you were expected home in a day or two. Believing that, I came here the day before yesterday. Walking a few miles doesn’t bother me anymore. Since you hadn’t arrived, I went back, found the Brahmachari, and returned yesterday, getting here around one this morning. With the window being[293] open, I entered the house and hid under the stairs without being seen. When everyone fell asleep, I went up; I thought you would definitely be sleeping in this room. I peeked in and saw you sitting there with your head in your hands. I wanted to throw myself at your feet, but I was afraid you wouldn’t forgive me for my wrongs against you, so I held back. From the window, I looked in, thinking, 'Now I will let him see me.' I came in, but you fainted, and ever since then, I’ve been sitting here with your head in my lap. I didn’t know such joy awaited me. But, oh! you don’t love me; when you touched me, you didn’t even recognize me! I should have known you by your breath."


CHAPTER XXXVII.
THE SIMPLETON AND THE SERPENT.

hile in the sleeping—chamber, bathed in a sea of joy, Nagendra and Surja Mukhi held loving converse, in another apartment of that same house a fatal dialogue was being held. Before relating it, it is necessary to record what occurred on the previous night. As we know, Nagendra had held no converse with Kunda Nandini on his return. In her own room, with her head on the pillow, Kunda had wept the whole night, not the easy tears of girlhood, but from a mortal wound. Whosoever in childhood has in all sincerity de[296]livered the priceless treasure of her heart to any one, and has in exchange received only neglect, can imagine the piercing pain of that weeping. "Why have I preserved my life," she asked herself, "with the desire to see my husband? Now what happiness remains to be hoped for?" With the dawn sleep came, and in that sleep, for the second time, a frightful vision. The bright figure assuming the form of her mother, which she had seen four years before by her dead father's bedside, now appeared above Kunda's head; but this time it was not surrounded by a shining halo, it descended upon a dense cloud ready to fall in rain. From the midst of the thick cloud another face smiled, while every now and then flashes of lightning broke forth. Kunda perceived with alarm that the incessantly smiling face resembled that of Hira, while her mother's compassionate countenance was very grave. The mother said: "Kunda, when I came before you did not listen, you did not come with me; now you see what trouble has befallen you." Kunda wept. The mother continued: "I told you I would come[297] once more, and here I am. If now you are satisfied with the joy that the world can give, come with me."
While in the bedroom, filled with joy, Nagendra and Surja Mukhi talked lovingly, in another part of the same house, a critical conversation was taking place. Before detailing it, it's important to mention what happened the night before. As we know, Nagendra hadn’t spoken with Kunda Nandini upon his return. In her own room, laying her head on the pillow, Kunda cried throughout the night—not the simple tears of youth, but from deep grief. Anyone who has genuinely given their heart to someone in childhood and received nothing but indifference in return can understand the deep pain of that crying. "Why have I held onto my life," she asked herself, "hoping to see my husband? What happiness is left to expect?" As dawn broke, sleep overtook her, and in that sleep, she had a terrifying vision again. The bright figure taking the form of her mother, which she had seen four years earlier by her father's deathbed, now appeared above Kunda; but this time it wasn't surrounded by a shining light, it descended from a dark cloud ready to unleash rain. From amid the thick cloud, another face smiled, and every now and then, flashes of lightning erupted. Kunda noticed with alarm that the constantly smiling face resembled Hira, while her mother’s compassionate expression was very serious. The mother said: "Kunda, when I came to you before, you didn't listen, you didn’t come with me; now look at the trouble that has come upon you." Kunda cried. The mother continued: "I told you I would return once more, and here I am. If you’re now content with the joy the world can offer, come with me."
"Take me with you, mother; I do not desire to stay here longer."
"Take me with you, Mom; I don't want to stay here any longer."
The mother, much pleased, repeated, "Come, then!" and vanished from sight.
The mother, very pleased, said, "Alright then!" and disappeared from view.
Kunda woke, and, remembering her vision, desired of the gods that this time her dream might be fulfilled.
Kunda woke up, and remembering her vision, she prayed to the gods that this time her dream would come true.
At dawn, when Hira entered the room to wait upon Kunda, she perceived that the girl was crying. Since the arrival of Kamal Mani, Hira had resumed a respectful demeanour towards Kunda, because she heard that Nagendra was returning. As though in atonement for her past behaviour, Hira became even more obedient and affectionate than formerly. Any one else would have easily penetrated this craftiness, but Kunda was unusually simple, and easily appeased. She felt no suspicion of this new affection; she imagined Hira to be sour-tempered, but not unfaithful. The woman said[298]—
At dawn, when Hira entered the room to attend to Kunda, she noticed that the girl was crying. Ever since Kamal Mani's arrival, Hira had taken on a more respectful attitude toward Kunda, because she heard that Nagendra was coming back. In a way to make up for her past behavior, Hira became even more obedient and caring than before. Anyone else would have easily seen through this cunning, but Kunda was unusually naive and quickly calmed down. She had no doubts about this newfound affection; she thought of Hira as grumpy, but not disloyal. The woman said[298]—
"Why do you weep, Ma Thakurani?"
"Why are you crying, Ma Thakurani?"
Kunda did not speak, but only looked at Hira, who saw that her eyes were swollen and the pillow soaked.
Kunda didn’t say anything, but just stared at Hira, who noticed that her eyes were puffy and the pillow was wet.
"What is this? you have been crying all night. Has the Babu said anything to you?"
"What’s going on? You’ve been crying all night. Did the Babu say something to you?"
"Nothing," said Kunda, sobbing with greater violence than before.
"Nothing," Kunda said, crying even harder than before.
Hira's heart swam with joy at the sight of Kunda's distress. With a melancholy face she asked—
Hira's heart swelled with joy at the sight of Kunda's distress. With a sad expression, she asked—
"Has the Babu had any talk with you since he came home? I am only a servant, you need not mind telling me."
"Have you talked to the Babu since he got home? I'm just a servant, so you don’t have to worry about telling me."
"I have had no talk with him."
"I haven't spoken to him."
"How is that, Ma? After so many days' absence has he nothing to say to you?"
"What's up with that, Mom? After being gone for so many days, does he have nothing to say to you?"
"He has not been near me," and with these words fresh tears burst forth.
"He hasn't been near me," and with those words, fresh tears started to fall.
Hira was delighted. She said, smiling, "Ma, why do you weep in this way? Many people are over head and ears in trouble, yet you cry incessantly over one sorrow. If you had as much to[299] bear as I have, you would have destroyed yourself before this time."
Hira was thrilled. She said with a smile, "Mom, why are you crying like this? Many people are deep in trouble, yet you cry nonstop over one sadness. If you had to deal with as much as I do, you would have broken down by now."
Suicide! this disastrous word struck heavily on the ear of Kunda; shuddering, she sat down. During the night she had frequently contemplated this step, and these words from Hira's mouth seemed to confirm her purpose.
Suicide! That devastating word hit Kunda hard; shivering, she sat down. Throughout the night, she had often thought about this decision, and Hira's words felt like confirmation of her intentions.
Hira continued: "Now hear what my troubles are. I also loved a man more than my own life. He was not my husband, but why should I hide my sin from my mistress? it is better to confess it plainly."
Hira continued: "Now listen to what my troubles are. I also loved a man more than my own life. He wasn't my husband, but why should I hide my wrong from my mistress? It's better to just admit it straightforwardly."
These shameless words did not enter Kunda's ear; in it the word "suicide" was repeating itself, as though a demon kept whispering, "Would it not be better for you to destroy yourself than to endure this misery?"
These shameless words didn’t reach Kunda; instead, the word "suicide" kept echoing in her mind, as if a demon was whispering, "Wouldn't it be better for you to end your life than to keep suffering like this?"
Hira continued: "He was not my husband, but I loved him better than the best husband. I knew he did not love me; he loved another sinner, a hundred times less attractive than I." At this point, Hira cast a sharp, angry glance from under her eyelids at Kunda, then went on: "Knowing[300] this, I did not run after him, but one day we were both wicked."
Hira continued: "He wasn’t my husband, but I loved him more than the best husband. I knew he didn’t love me; he loved another woman, who was way less attractive than I am." At this point, Hira shot a sharp, angry look at Kunda from under her eyelashes, then continued: "Knowing this, I didn’t chase after him, but one day, we were both reckless."
Beginning thus, Hira briefly related the terrible history. She mentioned no name, neither that of Debendra nor that of Kunda. She said nothing from which it could be inferred whom she had loved, or who was beloved by him. At length, after speaking of the abuse she had received, she said—
Beginning this way, Hira briefly shared the horrifying story. She didn't mention any names, neither Debendra's nor Kunda's. She kept quiet about who she had loved or who loved her. Finally, after recounting the mistreatment she had faced, she said—
"Now what do you suppose I did?"
"Now, what do you think I did?"
"What did you do?"
"What did you do?"
"I went to a Kabiraj. He has all sorts of poisons by which life can be destroyed."
"I went to a Kabiraj. He has all kinds of poisons that can end a life."
In low tones Kunda said, "After that?"
In a low voice, Kunda asked, "What happens after that?"
"I intended to kill myself. I bought some poison, but afterwards I thought, 'Why should I die for another?' so I have kept the poison in a box."
"I planned to end my life. I got some poison, but then I thought, 'Why should I die for someone else?' so I’ve kept the poison in a box."
Hira brought from the corner of the room a box in which she kept the treasures received as rewards from her employers, and also what she got by less fair means. Opening it, she showed the poison to Kunda, who eyed it as a cat does cream. Then[301] Hira, leaving the box open as though from absence of mind, began to console Kunda. At this moment, suddenly, in the early dawn, sounds of happiness and rejoicing were heard in the household. Hira darted forth in astonishment. The ill-fated Kunda Nandini seized the opportunity to steal the poison from the box.
Hira brought over a box from the corner of the room where she kept the treasures she received as rewards from her employers, along with what she acquired through less honest means. Opening it, she showed the poison to Kunda, who eyed it like a cat looks at cream. Then[301] Hira, leaving the box open as if lost in thought, began to comfort Kunda. At that moment, suddenly, in the early dawn, sounds of joy and celebration erupted in the household. Hira rushed out in surprise. The unfortunate Kunda Nandini seized the chance to steal the poison from the box.


CHAPTER XXXVIII.
THE CATASTROPHE.

ira could not at first understand the cause of the joyous sounds she heard. She saw in one of the large rooms all the women of the house, the boys and the girls surrounding some one and making a great noise. Of the person surrounded, Hira could see nothing but the hair, which Kousalya and the other attendants were dressing with scented oil and arranging becomingly. Of the by-standers encircling them some were laughing, some weeping, some talking, some uttering bless[304]ings. The girls and boys were dancing, singing, and clapping their hands. Kamal Mani was going round directing that shells should be blown and other joyous demonstrations, laughing, crying, and even dancing.
Hira couldn't initially figure out what was making all the happy noises she heard. She saw all the women in the house, along with the boys and girls, gathered around someone and making a lot of commotion. The person in the center was mostly obscured, but Hira could see their hair as Kousalya and the other attendants styled it with fragrant oil. Among the onlookers, some were laughing, some were crying, some were chatting, and others were offering blessings. The girls and boys were dancing, singing, and clapping their hands. Kamal Mani was moving around, instructing people to blow shells and engage in other festive activities, enjoying the laughter, tears, and even dancing.
Hira was astonished. Stepping into the throng, she stretched her neck and peeped about. What were her feelings on beholding Surja Mukhi seated on the floor, a loving smile upon her lips; submitting to be decked with all her ornaments, so long laid aside, speaking kindly to all, a little shamefaced.
Hira was amazed. As she entered the crowd, she craned her neck and looked around. What did she feel when she saw Surja Mukhi sitting on the floor, a warm smile on her face; allowing herself to be adorned with all the jewelry she had set aside for so long, speaking sweetly to everyone, a bit shy?
Hira could not all at once believe that Surja Mukhi who had died was now amongst them smiling so pleasantly. Stammeringly she asked one of the throng of women, "Who is that?"
Hira couldn't believe that Surja Mukhi, who had passed away, was now smiling among them so pleasantly. She hesitantly asked one of the group of women, "Who is that?"
Kousalya heard the question, and answered, "Don't you know? The goddess of our house, and your executioner."
Kousalya heard the question and replied, "Don't you know? The goddess of our home, and your executioner."
Kousalya had lived all this time in fear of Hira. Now in her day of triumph she vented her spleen.
Kousalya had spent all this time afraid of Hira. Now, in her moment of victory, she let out her frustrations.
The dressing being completed and all kindly[305] greetings exchanged, Surja Mukhi said in a low voice to Kamal Mani, "Let us go and see Kunda. She is not guilty of any fault towards me. I am not angry with her; she is now my younger sister."
The dressing finished and all friendly[305] greetings exchanged, Surja Mukhi said quietly to Kamal Mani, "Let’s go check on Kunda. She hasn’t done anything wrong to me. I’m not upset with her; she’s now my younger sister."
Only they two went. They were long away. At last Kamal Mani came out of Kunda's room with a countenance full of fear and distress, and in great haste sent for Nagendra.
Only the two of them went. They were gone a long time. Finally, Kamal Mani came out of Kunda's room looking scared and upset, and urgently called for Nagendra.
On his arrival the ladies told him he was wanted in Kunda's room. At the door he met Surja Mukhi weeping.
On his arrival, the ladies informed him that he was needed in Kunda's room. At the door, he encountered Surja Mukhi in tears.
"What has happened?" he asked.
"What happened?" he asked.
"Destruction! I have long known I was destined not to have a single day of happiness, else how is it that in the first moment of joy this calamity comes upon me?"
"Destruction! I've known for a while that I was meant to never have a single day of happiness; otherwise, how could it be that just when I finally feel joy, this disaster strikes me?"
"What has happened?"
"What's going on?"
"I brought up Kunda to womanhood, and now that I have come hither with the desire to cherish her as my little sister, my desire has turned to ashes: Kunda has taken poison!"
"I raised Kunda to be a woman, and now that I’m here wanting to care for her like my little sister, my hopes have burned away: Kunda has taken poison!"
"What do you say?"[306] "Do you remain with her. I will go for a doctor."
"What do you think?"[306] "Are you staying with her? I’ll go get a doctor."
Surja Mukhi went on her errand, and Nagendra to Kunda's room alone. He found Kunda's face darkened, her eyes lustreless, her body relaxed.
Surja Mukhi went about her task, and Nagendra headed to Kunda's room alone. He found Kunda's face shadowed, her eyes dull, her body limp.


CHAPTER XXXIX.
KUNDA'S TONGUE IS LOOSENED.

unda Nandini was seated on the floor, her head resting against the the bed-post. At sight of Nagendra the tears came into her eyes. As he stood beside her, Kunda, like a severed branch of a twining plant, laid her head at his feet. In a stifled voice he said—
unda Nandini was sitting on the floor, her head leaning against the bedpost. When she saw Nagendra, tears welled up in her eyes. As he stood next to her, Kunda, like a broken branch of a climbing plant, rested her head at his feet. In a choked voice, he said—
"What is this, Kunda? for what fault are you leaving me?"
"What’s going on, Kunda? Why are you leaving me?"
Kunda had not been used to answer her husband, but now, at her last hour, her tongue was loosened. She said, "For what fault did you leave me?"[308]
Kunda had never talked back to her husband before, but now, in her final moments, she found the words. She asked, "What did I do wrong that made you leave me?"[308]
Silenced, Nagendra sat beside Kunda with bent head.
Silenced, Nagendra sat next to Kunda with his head down.
She went on: "If on coming home yesterday you had called for me, if you had once come and sat by me in this way, I had not died. I have had you but a short time, even to day my desire to see you is not satisfied. I would not have died."
She continued, "If you had called for me when you got home yesterday, if you had just come and sat with me like this, I wouldn't have died. I’ve only had you for a little while, and even today my longing to see you isn’t fulfilled. I wouldn't have died."
At these loving, heart-piercing words, Nagendra let his head fall upon his knees, and remained speechless.
At these loving, heart-wrenching words, Nagendra lowered his head onto his knees and stayed silent.
Then Kunda spoke again. To day she was eloquent, for it was her last day with her husband. She said, "Fie! do not sit thus silent; if I see not your face smiling as I die, I shall not die happy."
Then Kunda spoke again. Today she was eloquent, for it was her last day with her husband. She said, "Come on! Don't sit there silent; if I don't see your face smiling as I die, I won't die happy."
Surja Mukhi also had thus spoken. In death all are equal.
Surja Mukhi also said this: In death, everyone is equal.
Struck to the heart, Nagendra said in troubled tones, "Why have you done this? Why did you not send for me?"
Struck to the core, Nagendra said with a troubled voice, "Why did you do this? Why didn’t you call for me?"
Kunda, with many a smile transient as a flash of lightning, said, "Think not of that; what I said, I said in the hurry of my mind. Before you[309] came I had determined that after I had seen you I would die. I had resolved that if the Didi (Surja Mukhi) returned, I would leave you with her and die. I would no longer be a thorn in her path of happiness. I had determined to die, but on seeing you I was not willing."
Kunda, with smiles as fleeting as lightning, said, "Don’t think about that; I said what I said in a moment of rush. Before you[309] arrived, I had decided that after seeing you, I would die. I had made up my mind that if the Didi (Surja Mukhi) came back, I would leave you with her and die. I didn’t want to be an obstacle in her pursuit of happiness. I had resolved to die, but seeing you made me unwilling to do so."
Nagendra made no answer. To-day he was without reply to the formerly speechless Kunda Nandini. Kunda remained silent for some time; she was losing the power of speech, death was taking possession. Then Nagendra saw the death-shadowed face full of love. Its gentle light shining in her troubled face, remained stamped on Nagendra's heart to his latest day. After a rest, she said, with great difficulty—
Nagendra didn't respond. Today, he had no words for the once-silent Kunda Nandini. Kunda was quiet for a while; she was losing her ability to speak, as death was closing in. Then Nagendra noticed her face, shaded by death yet filled with love. The soft light that illuminated her troubled expression stayed with him for the rest of his life. After a moment, she said, with great effort—
"My thirst for speech has not been satisfied. I knew you to be a god; I never had the courage to speak, my desire was not extinguished. Death is approaching, my mouth is dry, my tongue falters, I have no more time."
"My thirst for conversation hasn’t been quenched. I recognized you as a god; I never had the guts to speak, my longing wasn’t snuffed out. Death is coming, my mouth is parched, my tongue trips up, I don’t have any more time."
She rested her head upon Nagendra, closed her eyes, and remained speechless. The doctor came but he gave her no medicine. Seeing that there[310] was no hope, he withdrew with a sad countenance. Feeling that the last hour was come, Kunda wished to see Surja Mukhi and Kamal Mani. Both came; Kunda took the dust from their feet, they weeping loudly. Then Kunda hid her face between her husband's feet. She spoke no more, consciousness gradually departed. Her face lying on her husband's feet, the youthful Kunda Nandini's spirit departed, the blooming flower died.
She rested her head on Nagendra, closed her eyes, and stayed silent. The doctor came but didn’t give her any medicine. Seeing that there[310] was no hope, he left with a sorrowful expression. Knowing her time was nearing, Kunda wanted to see Surja Mukhi and Kamal Mani. Both of them came; Kunda touched their feet, and they cried loudly. Then Kunda hid her face between her husband's feet. She didn't speak anymore, and her awareness slowly faded. With her face resting on her husband's feet, the young Kunda Nandini's spirit left, and the beautiful flower wilted.
Surja Mukhi, checking her sobs, looked at her dead companion-wife, and said, "May thy happy fate be mine; may I die thus, my head on my husband's feet." Then taking her weeping husband's hand, she led him away.
Surja Mukhi, holding back her tears, looked at her deceased partner and said, "I hope to meet the same happy fate; I want to die like this, with my head at my husband's feet." Then, taking her grieving husband's hand, she led him away.
Afterwards, Nagendra, recovering his firmness, took Kunda to the riverside, performed the last rites, and bade farewell to the lovely form.
After that, Nagendra, regaining his composure, took Kunda to the riverside, conducted the final rites, and said goodbye to her beautiful form.


CHAPTER XL.
THE END.

fter Kunda Nandini's death, people asked where she obtained the poison, and all began to suspect that it was Hira's work.
After Kunda Nandini's death, people wondered where she got the poison, and everyone started to suspect that Hira was responsible.
Nagendra directed that Hira should be called, but she was not to be found; since Kunda's death she had disappeared. From that time no one ever saw Hira in that part of the country; her name was no longer heard in Govindpur.
Nagendra instructed that Hira should be called, but she was nowhere to be found; ever since Kunda's death, she had vanished. After that, no one ever saw Hira in that region; her name was no longer mentioned in Govindpur.
Once only, a year later, she showed herself to Debendra. The poison tree planted by Debendra had by that time borne fruit; he was seized with[312] a malignant disease, and as he did not cease drinking, the disease became incurable. During the first year after Kunda's death, Debendra's summons came. Two or three days before his death, as he lay on his bed without power to rise, there suddenly arose a great noise at the door.
Once, a year later, she revealed herself to Debendra. The poisonous tree planted by Debendra had by then borne fruit; he was afflicted with a serious illness, and since he didn’t stop drinking, the illness turned incurable. In the first year after Kunda's death, Debendra’s time came. Two or three days before he died, as he lay in bed unable to get up, there suddenly came a loud commotion at the door.
In answer to Debendra's inquiries, the servant said, "A mad woman wants to see you, sir; she will not be forbidden."
In response to Debendra's questions, the servant said, "A crazy woman wants to see you, sir; she can't be turned away."
He gave orders that she should be admitted. The woman appeared. Debendra saw that she was reduced by want, but observed no sign of madness; he thought her a wretched beggar-woman. She was young, and retained the signs of former beauty, but now she was a sight indeed. Her apparel soiled, ragged, patched, and so scanty that it barely reached her knees, while her back and head remained uncovered; her hair unkempt, dishevelled, covered with dust and matted together; her body never oiled, withered-looking, covered with mud. As she approached, she cast so wild a glance on Debendra that he saw the servants were right—she was truly a mad-woman.[313]
He ordered that she be let in. The woman showed up. Debendra noticed she was worn down by hardship, but there was no sign of insanity; he thought she was a miserable beggar. She was young and still showed hints of her past beauty, but now she was a pitiful sight. Her clothes were dirty, torn, patched up, and so short that they barely reached her knees, leaving her back and head exposed; her hair was messy, tangled, dusty, and matted together; her skin dry and neglected, covered in mud. As she came closer, she shot Debendra such a frantic look that he realized the servants were right—she was genuinely insane.[313]
After gazing at him some time, she said, "Do you not know me? I am Hira."
After looking at him for a while, she said, "Don't you recognize me? I'm Hira."
Recognizing her, Debendra asked in astonishment, "Who has brought you to this condition?"
Recognizing her, Debendra asked in surprise, "Who put you in this situation?"
Hira, with a glance full of rage, biting her lip and clenching her fist, approached to strike Debendra; but restraining herself she said, "Ask again who has brought me to this condition: this is your doing. You don't know me now, but once you took your pleasure of me. You don't remember it, but one day you sang this song"—bursting forth into a love-song.
Hira, her eyes blazing with anger, biting her lip and clenching her fist, moved to hit Debendra; but holding herself back, she said, "Ask again who’s responsible for my situation: this is your fault. You don’t know me now, but there was a time you enjoyed my company. You might not remember it, but one day you sang this song"—and then she broke into a love song.
In this manner reminding him of many things, she said: "On the day you drove me out I became mad. I went to take poison. Then a thought of delight came to me; instead of taking it myself, I would cause either you or Kunda Nandini to do so. In that hope I hid my illness for a time; it comes and goes; when it was on me I stayed at home, when well I worked. Finally, having poisoned your Kunda, my trouble was soothed; but after seeing her death my illness increased. Finding that I could not hide it any longer, I left[314] the place. Now I have no food. Who gives food to a mad woman? Since then I have begged. When well I beg; when the disease presses I stay under a tree. Hearing of your approaching death, I have come to delight myself in seeing you. I give you my blessing, that even hell may find no place for you."
In this way, reminding him of many things, she said: "On the day you kicked me out, I went crazy. I thought about taking poison. Then I had a delightful idea; instead of taking it myself, I’d make either you or Kunda Nandini take it. With that hope, I hid my illness for a while; it comes and goes; when I felt sick, I stayed home, and when I felt better, I worked. Finally, after poisoning your Kunda, I felt some relief; but after seeing her die, my illness got worse. Realizing I couldn’t hide it any longer, I left[314] the place. Now I have no food. Who feeds a madwoman? Since then, I’ve been begging. When I’m well, I beg; when the illness hits, I stay under a tree. Hearing about your impending death, I came to find joy in seeing you. I give you my blessing, that even hell may have no place for you."
Thus saying, the mad-woman uttered a loud laugh. Alarmed, Debendra moved to the other side of the bed; then Hira danced out of the house, singing the old love-song.
Thus saying, the crazy woman let out a loud laugh. Alarmed, Debendra moved to the other side of the bed; then Hira danced out of the house, singing the old love song.
From that time Debendra's bed of death was full of thorns. He died delirious, uttering words of the love-song.
From that time, Debendra's deathbed was filled with thorns. He died in a haze, mumbling lines from a love song.
After his death the night-watch heard with a beating heart the familiar strain from the mad-woman in the garden.
After his death, the night-watch listened with anxious hearts to the familiar tune from the crazy woman in the garden.
The "Poison Tree" is finished. We trust it will yield nectar in many a house.
The "Poison Tree" is complete. We hope it will bring sweetness to many homes.


GLOSSARY OF HINDU WORDS.
Attar. | Commonly called in England Otto of Roses. |
Bari. | The Hindu home. |
Bhagirati. | A river, branch of the Ganges. |
Boiragi. | A religious devotee. |
Boisnavi. | A female mendicant; a votary of Vishnu. |
Boroari. | A Hindu festival. |
Boita khana. | The sitting-room of the male members of the household, and their guests. |
Bonti. | A fish knife. |
Bou. | The wife. |
Brahmachari. | A student of the Vedas. |
Brahman. | An officiating Hindu priest |
Brahmo Somaj. | The church of the Theistic sect or Brahmos. |
Dada Babu. | Elder brother. |
Dahuk. | A bird of the Crane species. |
Didi. | Elder sister. |
Duftur Khana. | Accountant's office. |
Durga. | A Hindu goddess. |
Darwan. | A doorkeeper. |
Ghat. | Landing steps to a river or tank. |
Ghi. | Clarified butter. |
Gomashta. | Factor or agent; a rent-collector. |
Grihini. | The house-mistress. |
Ganga. | The river Ganges. |
Joisto. | The Hindu month corresponding to May—June. |
Kabiraj. | A Hindu physician. |
Kacheri. | Courthouse, or Revenue-office. |
Kayasta. | The writer caste. |
Khansamah. | A Mahommedan butler. |
Korta. | The master of the house. |
Ma Thakurani. | A title of respect to the mistress. |
Mahal. | A division of a house. |
Malini. | A flower girl. |
Manji. | A boatman. |
Naib. | A deputy, representing the Zemindar. |
Pandit. | A learned Brahman. |
Papiya. | A bird. |
Puja. | Hindu worship. |
Puja Mahal. | The division of the house devoted to worship. |
Pardah. | A screen or curtain. |
Ryot. | A tiller of the soil. |
Sari. | A woman's garment. |
Shastras. | Hindu sacred books. |
Shradda. | An obsequial ceremony, in which food and water are offered to deceased ancestors. |
Siva. | A Hindu Cod. |
Sraban. | The Hindu months corresponding to July—August. |
Talao. | A tank or enclosed pond |
Thakur. | The Deity; sometimes applied as a title of honour to the master of the house. |
Thakur Ban. | The chamber occupied by the family deity. |
Tulsi. | A plant held sacred by the Hindus. |
Zemindar. | A landholder. |
Zillah. | A district or local division. |

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