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VILLA ELSA
A Story of German Family Life
BY
STUART HENRY

NEW YORK
E. P. DUTTON & COMPANY
681 5th Avenue
Copyright 1920, BY
E. P. DUTTON & COMPANY
All Rights Reserved
Printed in the United States of America
TO
Pat and Anna
IN LOVING TOKEN OF OUR
WINTER'S CONVERSATIONS ON THE GERMANS
FOREWORD
THIS narrative offers a gentle but permanent answer to the problem presented to humanity by the German people. It seeks to go beyond the stage of indemnities, diplomatic or trade control, peace by armed preponderance. These agencies do not take into account Teuton nature, character, manner of living, beliefs.
THIM narrative provides a kind yet lasting solution to the issue posed to humanity by the German people. It aims to move past remedies like reparations, diplomatic or trade restrictions, and peace enforced by military strength. These approaches overlook the German nature, character, lifestyle, and beliefs.
Unless the Germans are changed, the world will live at swords' points with them both in theory and in practice. Whether they are characteristically Huns or not, it should be tragically realized that something ought to be done to alter their type. Their minds, hearts, souls, should be touched in a direct, personal, intimate way. There should be a natural relationship of good feeling, an intelligent and lived mutual experience, worked up, brought[viii] about. A League of Nations, of Peace, inevitably based on some sort of force, should be followed by a truly human programme leading to the amicable conversion of that race, if it is at heart unrepentant, crafty, murderous.
Unless the Germans change, the world will remain in conflict with them both theoretically and practically. Regardless of whether they are truly Huns, it should be sadly acknowledged that we need to do something to change their nature. Their minds, hearts, and souls should be engaged in a direct, personal, and intimate way. There must be a natural relationship of goodwill, an intelligent and lived mutual experience developed and established. A League of Nations, for Peace, which would inevitably rely on some form of force, should be followed by a genuinely humane program aimed at the friendly transformation of that race, if they are truly unrepentant, cunning, and violent at heart.
In the absence of any particular heed being paid to this underlying, fundamental subject, the present pages suggest for it a vital solution that seems both easy and practical and would promise to relieve anxiety as to an indefinitely uncertain, ugly future ahead of harassed mankind.
In the absence of any specific attention given to this important, basic issue, the current pages propose a crucial solution that appears both straightforward and practical, and could help ease concerns about an uncertain and troubling future looming over stressed humanity.
How shall the German be treated in the present century and beyond?
How should we treat Germans in this century and the future?
To try to answer this aright, it is obviously necessary to know what the German is—what he is really like. To know him at his best, in his truest colors, is to live with him in his most normal condition, and that is at his fireside, surrounded by his family. This aspect has been the least fully presented during the war. What the Teuton military and political chieftains, clergymen, professors, captains of industry, editors and other men of position have said, how they have conducted themselves toward the rest of humanity, is notoriously[ix] and distressingly familiar. But what the ordinary, educated German of peaceful pursuits, staying by his hearthstone far behind and safe from the battle line, thought and wished to say, has been beyond our ken. There has been no way to get at him or hear from him as to what lay frankly in his mind.
To really answer this correctly, we need to understand what the German is—what he’s truly like. To see him at his best, in his true colors, is to live with him in his most natural state, which is at home, surrounded by his family. This side of him has been the least represented during the war. What the German military and political leaders, clergymen, professors, business leaders, editors, and other influential figures have said and how they’ve behaved towards the rest of the world is widely known and distressingly familiar. However, what the average, educated German who is focused on peaceful pursuits and safely distant from the front lines thinks and wants to express has been out of our reach. There has been no way to connect with him or hear from him about what he truly feels.
His leaders loudly proclaimed themselves to be as terrifying as Huns and unblushingly gloried in this profession. Has he agreed or has he silently disagreed? Has he too wished this or has he been unwilling? Is he essentially a Hun, are his family essentially Huns, or are they in reality good and kindly people like our people? Are they temporarily misled?
His leaders proudly declared themselves to be as fearsome as Huns and shamelessly took pride in this claim. Has he agreed with them or has he quietly disagreed? Does he also desire this or has he been reluctant? Is he essentially a Hun, are his family essentially Huns, or are they actually good and kind people like us? Are they just temporarily misguided?
The humble German families of education who are hospitable, who sing and weep over sentimental songs in their homes, whose duties are modest and revenues small, who have never been out of their provinces, who have had no relations with foreigners and could have no personal cause for hatred—have they been so bloodthirsty about killing and pillaging in alien lands?
The simple German families who are welcoming, who sing and cry over emotional songs in their homes, whose responsibilities are modest and incomes low, who have never left their regions, who have had no contact with outsiders and no personal reasons for hatred—have they really been so eager to kill and plunder in foreign lands?
Villa Elsa contains a family immune from any foreign influence and matured in the most[x] regular and unsuspecting Teuton way. The German household is the most thoroughly instructed of all households. Its members are disciplined to do most things well. How can it then be Hun in any considerable degree? Impossible, said the nations, and so they remained illy prepared against a frenzied onslaught. But a shocked public has beheld how readily the most erudite of mankind, as the Germans were generally held to be, could officially, deliberately and repeatedly as soldiers, singly and en masse, act like their ancestors—the barbarians of the days of Attila.
Villa Elsa is home to a family that is completely isolated from outside influences and has developed in the most[x] typical and unsuspecting German way. The German household is the most well-educated of all households. Its members are trained to excel at most tasks. How then can it be considered threatening in any significant way? Impossible, said the nations, and so they were poorly prepared for a sudden attack. But a shocked public witnessed how easily the most educated people, who were generally thought to be German, could officially, deliberately, and repeatedly—both individually and as a group—act like their ancestors—the barbarians from the days of Attila.
These are all puzzling queries which this story attempts to illuminate and solve by its pictures and observations of the life of such a modest and typical Teuton home in 1913 and 1914. Admittedly too much light, too much study, cannot be given to the greatest issue civilization as a whole has faced.
These are all puzzling questions that this story aims to clarify and address through its imagery and observations of the life in a humble and typical German home in 1913 and 1914. It's true that too much attention and analysis can't be devoted to the biggest challenge that civilization as a whole has encountered.
Villa Elsa is but Germany in miniature. In the significant character, habits and activities of this household may be found the true pith and essence of real Germanism as normally developed. This Germanism appears ready to continue after the War to be the malignant and would-be assassin of other civilizations.[xi] It is, therefore, tragically important to find and act on the right answer to the question:
Villa Elsa is like Germany in miniature. The key traits, habits, and activities of this household reveal the true core and essence of authentic German culture as it typically develops. This German culture seems poised to persist after the War as a harmful force that threatens other civilizations.[xi] It is, therefore, tragically important to find and respond to the right answer to the question:
Is there any possible way to make the Germans become true, peace-loving friends with us—with the rest of mankind?
Is there any way to help the Germans become genuine, peace-loving friends with us and with the rest of humanity?
CONTENTS
CHAPTER | PAGE | |
Forward | vii | |
I. | Victorious Germany in 1913 | 1 |
II. | Germany above all | 6 |
III. | Gard Kirtley | 11 |
IV. | Villa Elsa | 19 |
V. | Family Life | 29 |
VI. | The House | 36 |
VII. | German Love | 46 |
VIII. | German Dating | 54 |
IX. | A reporter | 64 |
X. | Espionage and Warfare | 71 |
XI. | German Styles | 78 |
XII. | Kids and Habits | 86 |
XIII. | Down with America! | 94 |
XIV. | Aftermath | 106 |
XV. | Military Dummies | 113 |
XVI. | A Energetic Musician | 120 |
XVII. | Immorality and Inappropriateness | 125 |
XVIII. | The Naked Cult | 134 |
XIX. | Jim Deming of Erie, PA | 145 |
XX. | An American Win | 152 |
XXI. | A Unique or Pagan People? | 160 |
XXII. | Preparing for War | 168 |
XXIII. | Social Etiquette | 178 |
XXIV. | The Court Ball | 186 |
XXV. | Fritzi and Another Chat | 192 |
XXVI. | Some of the Lesser-Known Efficiencies | 200 |
XXVII. | The Imperial Intelligence Agency | 210 |
XXVIII. | Jim Deming's Destiny | 218 |
XXIX. | Winter and Spring | 229 |
XXX. | Villa Elsa Outdoors | 238 |
XXXI. | A Chill Tragedy | 247 |
XXXII. | A German Marriage Proposal | 256 |
XXXIII. | A Server Dance | 263 |
XXXIV. | Champagne | 272 |
XXXV. | Recovery | 279 |
XXXVI. | The German Issue. A Solution | 285 |
XXXVII. | A German "God Be with You" | 294 |
XXXVIII. | A Trip | 302 |
XXXIX. | Charlemagne's Tomb | 313 |
XL. | The Conclusion of a Small Game | 323 |
XLI. | Are they Huns? | 329 |
XLII. | The Anti-Christians | 336 |
XLIII. | The German Issue. A Solution | 347 |
VILLA ELSA
CHAPTER I
Triumphant Germany in 1913
IN the late summer of 1913 a quiet American college man of twenty-three, tall, lean, somewhat listless in bearing, who had been idling on a trip in Germany without a thought of adventure, was observing, without being able to define or understand, one of the most remarkable conditions of national and racial exhilaration that ever blessed a country in time of ripest peace.
IN the late summer of 1913, a quiet American college student of twenty-three, tall and lean, with a somewhat aimless demeanor, was casually traveling in Germany without any intention of seeking adventure. He was witnessing, though he couldn’t quite define or grasp it, one of the most extraordinary moments of national and racial excitement that a country has ever experienced in a time of complete peace.
He had never been out of America, and supposed his Yankee people, with all their wide liberty, contemplated life with as much enjoyment as any other. But in that land which is governed with iron, where (as Bis[2]marck said) a man cannot even get up out of his bed and walk to a window without breaking a law, Gard Kirtley was finding something different, strange, wonderful, in the way of marked happiness. It pulsated everywhere, in every man, woman and child. It seemed to be a sensation of victory, yet there had been no victory. It appeared to reflect some mighty distinctive human achievement or event of which a whole race could be proud in unison. There had been nothing of the sort.
He had never left America and assumed his fellow Americans, with all their freedom, experienced life with as much enjoyment as anyone else. But in that land ruled with an iron fist, where (as Bismarck said) a person can't even get out of bed and walk to a window without breaking a law, Gard Kirtley was discovering something different, strange, and wonderful in the way of notable happiness. It was everywhere, in every man, woman, and child. It felt like a sensation of victory, even though there had been no victory. It seemed to reflect some remarkable human achievement or event that a whole nation could take pride in together. But nothing of the sort had happened.
And yet it was there, a certain exuberance. The people, with heads carried high, quickly moving feet and pockets full of money, were enlivened by a public joyousness because they were humans and, above all, because they were Germans. It seemed a joy of human prestige, of wholesale well-being, of an assuredly auspicious future. Multitudes of toasts were being drunk. The marching and counter-marching of soldiers looked excessive even for Germany. A season of patriotic holidays was apparently at hand. Festivals, public rites, celebrated the widespread exultation. The whole country conducted itself as on parade, en fête.
And yet there was a certain excitement in the air. The people, with their heads held high, moving quickly and with pockets full of money, were filled with a public joy because they were human and, above all, because they were German. It felt like a joy of human dignity, of overall well-being, and a definitely promising future. Countless toasts were being raised. The marching and counter-marching of soldiers seemed excessive even for Germany. It seemed like a season of patriotic holidays was upon them. Festivals and public ceremonies celebrated the widespread happiness. The entire country was acting as if it were on parade, en fête.
Wages were higher and comforts greater[3] than ever known there. For the first time chambermaids often drank champagne and wore on their heads lop-sided creations of expensive millinery with confident awkwardness—creations which they said came from Paris. The chimney sweeps had high hats and smoked good tobacco which they may have thought came from London. For the imported was the high water mark of plenty in Germany as always elsewhere, though she claimed to make the best goods.
Wages were higher and comforts greater[3] than ever before. For the first time, chambermaids often drank champagne and confidently donned trendy hats made from pricey materials—hats they claimed were from Paris. The chimney sweeps wore top hats and smoked quality tobacco, which they probably thought was from London. Imported goods were the pinnacle of abundance in Germany, just as they were everywhere else, even though they claimed to produce the best products.
The scene should not be painted in too high colors—colors too fixed. To the careless observer it doubtless appeared little different from the annual flowering forth of the German race in its short summer season. Always at that time were the open gardens lively, the roses blooming with the crude, dense hues that the Teutons like, and all the folk pursuing their busy tasks and vigorous pleasures with a sort of goose-step alacrity.
The scene shouldn't be depicted in overly bright colors—colors that are too rigid. To an inattentive observer, it probably seemed not much different from the annual emergence of the German people during their short summer season. During that time, the open gardens were vibrant, with roses blooming in the bold, rich colors that the Germans prefer, and everyone was engaged in their bustling activities and energetic enjoyment with a kind of marching enthusiasm.
But the closer, more sensitive onlooker felt something more in 1913—something widely organized, unified, puissant, imperial indeed, such as, he may have imagined, had not existed since the days of the great emperors in Rome. What the Germans told all comers was that[4] they had the best of governments, and that no nation had been so thoroughly, soundly and extensively prosperous.
But the closer, more observant onlooker sensed something different in 1913—something well-organized, unified, powerful, and imperial indeed, which he might have imagined had not been seen since the days of the great emperors in Rome. What the Germans told everyone was that[4] they had the best government, and that no nation had been so thoroughly, soundly, and widely prosperous.
For each citizen read in his daily paper of successful and growing Teuton activities in the most distant parts of the earth—in ports, regions and among peoples whose names he had never heard before and could not pronounce. At breakfast his capacious paunch and his wife's fat, flowing bosom expanded with pride in hearing of some new far-off passenger route carrying the flag, of the Made in Germany brand sweeping the markets of the world, and perhaps of the Kaiser's safe return to his palace, bronzed with the cast of health and strength. Never had investments brought the German such high rates. Never had speculation been so rife and withal so uniformly profitable.
Every citizen read in their daily paper about the successful and expanding German activities in the farthest corners of the world—in ports, regions, and among people whose names they had never heard of and couldn’t pronounce. At breakfast, their big belly and their spouse's ample, flowing figure swelled with pride upon hearing about some new distant passenger route waving the flag, about the Made in Germany brand dominating global markets, and perhaps about the Kaiser’s safe return to his palace, tanned and healthy. Never before had investments yielded such high returns for Germans. Never had speculation been so common and, at the same time, so consistently profitable.
As for industry, Deutschland was a colossal beehive. If Frederick the Great started the beehive, William the Second was increasing its size to unbelievable proportions. Insignificant villages everywhere contained millions of dollars' worth of machinery, manufacturing goods of untold value. Not an ounce of energy, not a second of time, seemed to be lost[5] in the Empire. Every German was a busy cog fitted precisely into the whole national plant.
As for industry, Germany was a massive beehive. If Frederick the Great started the beehive, William the Second was expanding it to unbelievable sizes. Small villages everywhere were filled with millions of dollars' worth of machinery, producing goods of immense value. Not a bit of energy, not a second of time, seemed to be wasted[5] in the Empire. Every German was a busy cog perfectly fitted into the entire national system.
It was as if the Teuton knew that other races must soon stand with their backs to the wall and that now was the moment to redouble effort to capture still more trade and reduce the rest of the world to an acknowledged state of submission.
It was as if the German knew that other nations would soon be backed into a corner and that now was the time to put in extra effort to capture even more trade and force the rest of the world into a recognized state of submission.
CHAPTER II
Germany Above All
THUS the Germans, in 1913, felt how supreme their country was or was speedily becoming. Not only their newspapers but their educators, their pastors and, more than all, their military and political leaders told them that a place above the rest of mankind had been reached. The pride, the assurance, pervading the land was the stiff and hardy efflorescence of this universal conclusion. And the Teutons had earned and therefore merited it all, for no one, nothing, scarcely even Nature, had lent a helping hand.
THUS in 1913, the Germans felt how great their country was or was quickly becoming. Not just their newspapers, but also their educators, pastors, and especially their military and political leaders told them that they had reached a place above the rest of humanity. The pride and confidence spread throughout the country was a strong and resilient expression of this widespread belief. The Germans had earned and deserved it all, as no one, nothing, and hardly even Nature had provided any assistance.
German women knew they were the best housekeepers, wives, mothers, dressers, dancers. Never had they been so to the fore. Never had they had so much money to spend for clothes. Never had they promenaded so proudly to martial music or waltzed so per[7]spiringly with the fashion-plate officers whom they adored.
German women knew they were the best at keeping house, being wives, mothers, dressing well, and dancing. They had never been so prominent. They had never had so much money to spend on clothes. They had never walked so proudly to military music or danced so inspiringly with the handsome officers they admired.
The children were paragons of diligence and promise. In their school books and college text books everything German was lauded in the superlative; everything foreign was decried as inferior, undesirable. Nearly every human discovery, invention, improvement, was somehow traced to a Teuton origin. Even characteristic German vices were held to be better than many virtues in other lands.
The children were models of hard work and potential. In their textbooks and college materials, everything German was praised to the highest degree; everything foreign was criticized as inferior and unwelcome. Almost every human discovery, invention, and improvement was somehow linked to a German origin. Even typical German flaws were considered better than many virtues found in other countries.
The young person grew up to believe that the Rhine was the finest of rivers, the mountains of the Fatherland were the most celebrated in song and story, its lakes the most picturesque, its soil the best tilled. He was properly stuffed with the indomitable conviction, the aggressive obsession, that the fittest civilization must prevail.
The young person grew up believing that the Rhine was the best river, the mountains of the homeland were the most famous in songs and stories, its lakes were the most beautiful, and its soil was the most fertile. He was firmly filled with the strong belief, the fierce obsession, that the strongest civilization must win out.
And the army! Always the army—that bulwark, that invincible force! Hundreds of thousands of civilians apparently regretted they were not back in the barracks, following the noblest of occupations as soldiers for the supreme War Lord. The army represented admitted perfection. Foreign observers were united in naïvely attesting its impeccableness.[8] It was ready to the last shoe button, to the last twist of its waxed mustache. But ready for what? Few outside of Germany appeared to think of asking. The army was taken to be simply Teuton life and of no more ulterior significance than the national beer.
And the army! Always the army—that stronghold, that unbeatable force! Hundreds of thousands of civilians seemed to regret not being back in the barracks, engaging in the noblest profession as soldiers for the ultimate War Lord. The army represented accepted perfection. Foreign observers were naively united in praising its flawlessness.[8] It was prepared down to the last shoe button and the last twist of its waxed mustache. But ready for what? Few outside of Germany seemed to think to ask. The army was seen as simply German life with no more deeper meaning than the national beer.
The admission was also general at home and abroad that the German Government was the most free from graft and the most thorough. In Germany the kings and princes were paid homage as models of wisdom and virtue, and the Kaiser was believed to be walking with God, hand in hand, palm to palm. In token of the mystic union between Emperor and people, Hohenzollern monuments were seen rising in all parts of the Empire in greater quantity, amid greater thanksgivings. These Denkmals were growing huger, more thunderous in appearance, and served the double purpose of keeping the populace in a state of admiring, unquestioning awe and expressing fulminating Bewares! to other races. In every home, factory, retail shop, public place, was the Kaiser's picture, with his trellised mustache, and his devout eyes cast with a chummy comradeship up to heaven.
The general consensus both at home and abroad was that the German Government was the least corrupt and the most effective. In Germany, kings and princes were revered as symbols of wisdom and virtue, and the Kaiser was thought to be walking with God, side by side, palm to palm. To symbolize the mystical bond between the Emperor and the people, Hohenzollern monuments sprang up all over the Empire in greater numbers, celebrated with even more gratitude. These Denkmals were becoming larger and more imposing in appearance, serving the dual purpose of keeping the public in a state of admiring, unquestioning awe while also sending a loud warning to other nations. In every home, factory, retail shop, and public space, there was a picture of the Kaiser, with his distinctive mustache and his devoted eyes looking up to heaven in a friendly camaraderie.
All the foregoing explanations accounted in[9] part for a glorious increase in noise among a people that does everything loudly. The national noisiness was harmonized somewhat by innumerable bands and orchestras. Public balls seemed to have become the order of the night, and the famous forests by day were filled by echoes of the horns of the bloody chase—the cors de chasse of the legendary Roland and knights of the Nibelungen. Humble civilians grew fonder of the habit of donning their military or hunting uniforms and big marching boots, and sticking cock's feathers in their hats at rakish angles, recalling the war of 1870 or reviving dreams of the sporting Tyrol. They drank daily more pints of beer and swallowed the hot-headed Rhine wines as if thus renewing their blood in that of their fiery ancestors. Meals mounted to seven or eight a day, for it was proper to gorge themselves like the human gods they were. Even the most servile took on a conscious air of being of a regal species.
All the explanations above contributed to a huge increase in noise among a people that does everything loudly. The national noise level was somewhat balanced out by countless bands and orchestras. Public dances seemed to be the standard way to spend the night, and the famous forests during the day echoed with the horns of the intense hunts—the cors de chasse of the legendary Roland and the knights of the Nibelungen. Ordinary people became more fond of dressing in their military or hunting uniforms and wearing big marching boots, sticking cock's feathers in their hats at stylish angles, reminiscing about the war of 1870 or reviving dreams of the adventurous Tyrol. They drank more pints of beer each day and gulped down the fiery Rhine wines as if they were renewing their blood with that of their passionate ancestors. Meals increased to seven or eight a day, as it was fitting to feast like the gods they believed themselves to be. Even the most submissive individuals took on an air of being part of a noble lineage.
In this wise, the German, like Cain, the competent iron-worker, was treading the earth with resounding footsteps. Over his bullneck and under his spiked hat he had naturally come to look upon himself as a super-being.[10] While the American watched ball games, the Englishman played golf and the Frenchman wrote to his loved one, the Teuton was keeping himself hardened for war, and toiling like the systematic beaver in up-building national industries that were so swiftly dominating all others. To say the least, this intense people were strenuously perfecting an intensive and powerful civilization such as never had been seen.
In this way, the German, like Cain, the skilled ironworker, was walking the earth with powerful strides. With his thick neck and under his pointed hat, he had come to see himself as a super-being.[10] While Americans watched ball games, the English played golf, and the French wrote to their loved ones, the German was hardening himself for war, working tirelessly like a diligent beaver to build national industries that were quickly overtaking all others. To say the least, this intense people were passionately perfecting an impressive and powerful civilization like none seen before.
So—as Gard Kirtley was finding and yet failing to explain to himself—expectancy, undescribable and splendid, was in the air beyond the Rhine. And there was one special toast drunk to it all with ever more loudly clinking glasses—Der Tag! Such was triumphant Germany, the triumphant Vaterland, in 1913—foretasting a portentous future; pregnant with colossal success; swollen with a hundred years of victories and growth; as sure of its prowess and might as were the swaggering gods of its Valhallas.
So—as Gard Kirtley was discovering yet struggling to put into words—there was an indescribable and magnificent sense of anticipation in the air beyond the Rhine. And there was one special toast made to it all with glasses clinking louder and louder—Der Tag! Such was triumphant Germany, the triumphant Fatherland, in 1913—foreseeing a significant future; full of immense success; buoyed by a hundred years of victories and growth; as confident in its power and strength as the boastful gods of its Valhallas.
Imperial Deutschland über Alles!
Germany Above All!
CHAPTER III
Gard Kirtley
INTO this Triumphant Germany young Kirtley had come to recuperate from the sadness over the loss, the previous year, of his parents and from a siege of sickness. Still somewhat pale, somewhat weak, he showed the shock he had undergone. He had toured across southern Germany and up to Berlin where he had bidden good-by to his chance American traveling companion, Jim Deming, who was knocking about Italy and Teutonland. They had exchanged final addresses.
INTO this triumphant Germany, young Kirtley had come to recover from the sadness of losing his parents the previous year and from a bout of illness. Still a bit pale and weak, he showed the effects of what he had been through. He had traveled through southern Germany and up to Berlin, where he said goodbye to his American travel buddy, Jim Deming, who was exploring Italy and Germany. They had exchanged their final addresses.
Kirtley, clean-shaven, with pleasant brown eyes, and brown hair brushed down flat, giving his head the appearance of smallness, looked very lank and Yankeeish among the robust, fat Teutons of the Saxon capital. He was entering Dresden on a late afternoon brown[12] with German sunshine. The school year had begun, but a loitering summer-time brightened city and countryside. As he made his way slowly through the throng at the station, he gave evidence of a rather shy way of looking up and about, an apologetic readiness to step aside, to yield place, not characteristic of the speedy American in Europe. He had not, as we have said, come to Germany for adventure. He had not come merely to idle for the winter. And certainly he little mistrusted he was finally to figure as a modest hero in a curious and dangerous experience that linked itself up with the beginning of the war of which he, like the world at large, felt not the slightest premonition.
Kirtley, clean-shaven, with friendly brown eyes and brown hair brushed flat, giving his head a small appearance, looked very lank and American among the stout, hearty Germans of the Saxon capital. He was entering Dresden on a late afternoon, bathed in warm German sunshine. The school year had started, but a lingering summer brightened both the city and countryside. As he slowly navigated through the crowd at the station, he showed a rather shy tendency to look up and around, an apologetic willingness to step aside and make way, which wasn’t typical of the fast-paced American in Europe. He hadn’t come to Germany for adventure. He hadn’t come just to lounge around for the winter. And he certainly had no idea he would end up as a modest hero in a strange and dangerous situation connected to the start of the war, which he, like the rest of the world, felt no inkling of.
His German teacher had been his favorite in his eastern college where he had one season been a very fair halfback. His better showing had exhibited itself in his ability to throw from left field to home plate on the ball team. This American preceptor of German parentage had taken an interest in Kirtley with the insistent way of Teutonic pedagogues. Always commending with a uniform vigor the Germans and German fashions of living, he had[13] gradually filled Gard full of the idea of their excelling merits.
His German teacher had been his favorite at his college in the East, where he played a decent halfback one season. His skills really shone through when he could throw from left field to home plate on the baseball team. This American teacher of German descent was genuinely interested in Kirtley, much like typical German educators. He consistently praised the Germans and their way of life, gradually filling Gard’s mind with the idea of their outstanding qualities.[13]
Kirtley heard of the tonic of the nutritious Teuton beer and Teuton music in overflowing measures. In the Kaiser's realm, it appeared, the digestions are always good. How desirable it would be for Gard to take on some flesh in the German manner! In that climate, Professor Rebner claimed with assurance, although he had never been abroad, one can eat and drink his fill without causing the human system to rebel as it is apt to in our dry, high-strung America. His pupil's appetite would come back. Hearty meals of robust cheese and sausages would be craved with an honest, clamorous hunger that meant foolish indelicacy here at home.
Kirtley heard about the benefits of the nutritious German beer and vibrant German music in abundant doses. In the Kaiser’s realm, it seemed that digestion was always good. How wonderful it would be for Gard to gain some weight in the German way! In that environment, Professor Rebner confidently claimed, even though he had never traveled abroad, one could eat and drink as much as they wanted without upsetting the body like it tends to in our dry, high-strung America. His student’s appetite would return. Hearty meals of rich cheese and sausages would be desired with a sincere, loud hunger that would be considered inappropriate back home.
Rebner also urged that Gard could in Deutschland improve his German which, notwithstanding his affection for his preceptor, was indifferent. Its gutturalness grated on his nerves, antagonized him. But he criticized himself for this, not the language. Had not his old mentor always sung of the superiorities of that tongue?
Rebner also suggested that Gard could improve his German in Germany, which, despite his fondness for his teacher, was lacking. The harsh sounds grated on his nerves and irritated him. However, he blamed himself for this, not the language. Hadn't his old mentor always praised the excellence of that language?
Kirtley could improve, too, his fingering on[14] the piano by familiarizing himself with the noble melodies that flooded the German land. Two hairy hands would go up in exultation,
Kirtley could improve, too, his fingering on[14] the piano by getting to know the beautiful melodies that filled Germany. Two hairy hands would rise in celebration,
"To hear Beethoven and Wagner in their own country, filling the atmosphere with their glories! And then Goethe and Schiller. Those mighty deities. To read them in their own home!"
"To experience Beethoven and Wagner in their own country, filling the air with their greatness! And then Goethe and Schiller. Those powerful legends. To read them in their own home!"
But the greatest thing, to the old professor's mind, would be to behold the German people themselves, study them, profit by them in their preëminence. What an example, what an inspiration, what a grand symphony of concentrated harmony! Germany was the source of Protestantism and therefore of modern morals—honest, uncompromising morals. German discipline would have a bracing, solidifying effect on a typically casual, slack American youth like Gard, whose latent capabilities were never likely to be fully called upon in the comparatively hit-and-miss organization of Yankee life.
But to the old professor, the best thing would be to see the German people themselves, to study them, and to benefit from their excellence. What an example, what inspiration, what a beautiful symphony of focused harmony! Germany was the birthplace of Protestantism and thus modern morals—genuine, unwavering morals. German discipline would have a refreshing and strengthening effect on a typically laid-back, easygoing American youth like Gard, whose hidden potential was unlikely to be fully realized in the relatively unpredictable setup of American life.
For he had not yet begun to find himself. He had not even decided on a calling at an age when the German is almost a full-fledged citizen, shouldering all the accompanying[15] obligations. Kirtley's exemplary conduct and the gravity cast over him by the death of his loved ones, had led him to think a little of Rebner's suggestions about the ministry. And for this, Luther's country would be expected to be sublime.
For he hadn't yet started to discover himself. He hadn't even chosen a career at an age when a German is usually a full-fledged citizen, taking on all the responsibilities that come with it[15]. Kirtley's admirable behavior and the seriousness brought on by the loss of his loved ones had led him to consider Rebner's suggestions about the ministry a bit. And for this, Luther's country would be expected to be exceptional.
The loudly reiterated praise of Germany and the Germans had at last produced the desired effect on Gard. He was prevailed upon to break away from the old associations, go abroad for a year and get a fresh and stout hold on the future. Rebner, through his connections, had been able to arrange for a home in Saxony for his pupil's sojourn. It was in "a highly estimable and well-informed family" who had never taken a paying guest. Although a new experience for them, they had urgently insisted that they would do everything they could to make his stay agreeable and beneficial. This was deemed most lucky. For the real German character and existence could there be observed and lived with the best profit, uncontaminated by the intermixture of doubtful foreign associations.
The constant praise of Germany and the Germans finally had the desired effect on Gard. He was encouraged to break away from his old connections, go abroad for a year, and gain a fresh and strong grip on the future. Thanks to Rebner’s connections, he was able to arrange for Gard to stay with a family in Saxony. They were "a highly respected and knowledgeable family" who had never hosted a paying guest before. Although it was a new experience for them, they insisted they would do everything possible to make his stay enjoyable and beneficial. This was considered very fortunate. Here, the true German character and way of life could be experienced and observed for maximum benefit, untainted by questionable foreign influences.
And so Gard had arrived in Dresden, in whose attractive suburb of Loschwitz, on the[16] gently rising banks of the Elbe, the worthy Buchers were domiciled. As his limping German did not give him confidence about the up-and-down variety of the Saxon dialect, he did not venture this afternoon to find his way by tram to the house. The blind German script in which his hosts' solicitous and minute instructions were couched, and the funny singsong of the natives talking blatantly about him, made him feel still more helpless. He sought refuge in an open droschke. He could then, too, enjoy the drive across the city.
And so Gard had reached Dresden, where the respectable Buchers lived in the nice suburb of Loschwitz, on the[16] gently sloping banks of the Elbe. Since his clumsy German made him unsure about the ups and downs of the Saxon dialect, he decided not to try taking the tram to their house that afternoon. The confusing German script containing his hosts' detailed instructions and the strange sing-song chatter of the locals talking loudly about him only made him feel more lost. He opted for an open cab instead. This way, he could also enjoy the ride across the city.
The Saxon capital sits capaciously like a comfortable old dowager fully dressed in stuffs of a richly dull color. Her thick skirts are spread about her with a contented dignity which does not interfere with her eating large sandwiches openly and vigorously at the opera. To-day the mellow sunlight crowned her ancient nobleness with a becoming hue, as Gard was jogged along in a roundabout way through the city. Here at the left were the august bridges and great park, all famed in Napoleon's battles. Over there were the dowdy royal palaces. There, too, was the house of the sacred Sistine. Her[17] sweet lineaments shone down in almost every American parlor Gard knew.
The Saxon capital sits comfortably like an elegant old lady fully dressed in richly muted colors. Her thick skirts spread out around her with a dignified contentment, which doesn't stop her from boldly enjoying large sandwiches at the opera. Today, the warm sunlight highlighted her ancient grandeur with a flattering glow as Gard was taken on a roundabout journey through the city. To the left were the impressive bridges and the large park, all famous from Napoleon's battles. Over there were the plain royal palaces. There, too, was the house of the sacred Sistine. Her[17] lovely features captured in almost every American parlor Gard knew.
The dingy baroque architecture, whose general tastelessness was heavily banked up by a multitude of towers, gables and high copings, suggested an old-fashioned residential city of the days of urban fortifications. The uniform arrays of buildings, all pretending to the effect of sumptuousness thickened by weighty proportions and blasphemed by rococo hesitations and doubts, seemed constructed to exalt the doughty glory of Augustus the Strong—Dresden's local Thor, its chief heroic figure in the favorite Teuton galaxy of muscled Titans. Somber medieval squares, blocked away quaintly from the world, were relieved by the celebrated Brühl Terrace, enlivened by gilded statuary and by historic and literary memories.
The gloomy baroque architecture, whose overall tackiness was piled up by numerous towers, gables, and high edges, suggested an old-school residential city from the days of urban fortifications. The uniform rows of buildings, all trying hard to look luxurious while weighed down by heavy proportions and confused by rococo hesitations, seemed built to celebrate the brave glory of Augustus the Strong—Dresden's local hero, its main figure in the favorite Teutonic lineup of muscular Titans. Dark medieval squares, quaintly tucked away from the world, were brightened by the famous Brühl Terrace, animated by gold statues and rich historical and literary memories.
Through all this metropolis of formidable and dun respectability curved the Elbe as if to round off the massive imitations of something better somewhere else. Hither coursed the smooth brown stream from Bohemia, not far away, through the high fastnesses of the Erz range and the groomed vistas of Saxon[18] Switzerland, and past the frowning old fortress of Königstein, towering near a thousand feet above its untroubled bosom. Kirtley was to find the river, with its carefully tended shores, a companion in many an hour.
Through all this city of serious and dull respectability, the Elbe curved as if to complement the massive copies of something better elsewhere. The smooth brown river flowed from Bohemia, not far away, through the steep heights of the Erz mountains and the manicured views of Saxon[18] Switzerland, passing by the imposing old fortress of Königstein, rising nearly a thousand feet above its peaceful waters. Kirtley was going to find the river, with its well-kept banks, a companion during many hours.
CHAPTER IV
Villa Elsa
SUCH in brief was the scene that stretched out around him and enveloped his attention and interest. There was not majesty that would offend, but rather a cosy formality that is the absence of style. It cured somewhat the homesick inclinations that quite naturally haunted him after a wearying day of travel and as nightfall drew down about his loneliness. He was bound for the home of a strange family, speaking a tongue in which he was far from glib. It had been written, though, that the Bucher young people had learned English pretty well at school.
SUCH in brief was the scene that surrounded him and captured his attention and interest. There was no grandeur that would be off-putting, but rather a comfortable formality that lacked style. It eased some of the homesick feelings that naturally followed him after a long day of travel and as night fell around his loneliness. He was headed to the home of a family he didn't know, speaking a language he wasn't fluent in. However, it was said that the Bucher kids had learned English quite well in school.
Kirtley reached his destination to find that the parents were waiting expectantly to receive him. With German consciousness, they were stuffily attired for this novel and important event. After staunch greetings he was[20] led into the house past a big angry dog that stood guard tempestuously at the door. Gard found later that such savage barking was quite a feature of the Teuton threshold, and might be considered one bristling aspect or cause of the ungenial development of the social spirit in Germany. Cave canem can hardly be called a suitable first attraction toward the spread of hospitality. He feared he was going to be bitten and wished his welcome had not been complicated with shudders.
Kirtley arrived at his destination to find the parents waiting for him with eager anticipation. Dressed formally for this new and significant occasion, they exhibited a distinct German demeanor. After some firm greetings, he was[20] shown into the house, passing by an imposing dog that barked fiercely at the door. Gard later learned that such aggressive barking was a common feature at German homes and could be seen as a contributing factor to the unwelcoming nature of social interactions in Germany. Cave canem hardly sets a friendly tone for hospitality. He was worried about getting bitten and wished his welcome hadn’t come with such unease.
The entrance to Villa Elsa consisted of a hallway swimming in heady odors from the strong cooking in the adjacent kitchen. Kirtley stood for a moment stifled. But he was to become more used to the lusty smells that roam about, presumptuous and fortifying, in German households and of which, indeed, all German existence is resolutely redolent. Strength, whether in barking dogs or fumes or what-not, appeals to the race.
The entrance to Villa Elsa was a hallway filled with intense aromas from the rich cooking in the nearby kitchen. Kirtley paused for a moment, feeling overwhelmed. But he would soon get used to the bold smells that lingered in German homes, which were a significant part of everyday life in Germany. Strength, whether from barking dogs, smoke, or other sources, resonates with the culture.
In the passage-way, too, Gard was struck by the presence of various weapons, and shields, hunting horns, sundry pairs of large boots, military or shooting garments, belts loaded with cartridges. It seemed almost like the combative entry to some museum of[21] armor. Taken together with the embattled dog, it suggested a defended fortress rather than a peaceful fireside.
In the hallway, Gard was also struck by the sight of various weapons, shields, hunting horns, several pairs of large boots, military or shooting outfits, and belts filled with cartridges. It felt almost like the aggressive entrance to some museum of armor. Together with the battle-ready dog, it gave the impression of a fortified fortress rather than a cozy living room.
"How pugnacious!" Gard declared to himself.
"How aggressive!" Gard thought to himself.
In the entry Ernst was called, and he came promptly forth, a smiling lad of fifteen, with a musing face, his thick light hair thrown back and run through meditatively by his fingers. He conducted Gard up two flights to a good-sized but snug room where he was to abide. A linden tree courted the window panes with its green branches.
In the entry, Ernst was called, and he came right away, a smiling fifteen-year-old with a thoughtful expression, his thick light hair slicked back and idly running his fingers through it. He led Gard up two flights to a decent but cozy room where he would stay. A linden tree leaned against the window panes with its green branches.
Just the place for a fellow who wants to get away from the world and read!—Kirtley thought.
Just the perfect spot for someone who wants to escape from the world and read!—Kirtley thought.
On his nightstand lay, with characteristic Teuton foresight, the names and addresses of a language teacher and of a music teacher who were duly "recommending themselves" to him in the German idiom. Lists of purchasable text books and musical editions from houses which, in the thoroughly informed Teuton manner, had got wind of his coming, also opened before him.
On his nightstand, with typical German practicality, were the names and addresses of a language teacher and a music teacher who were properly "introducing themselves" to him in German. There were also lists of available textbooks and musical editions from companies that, in true German fashion, had heard about his arrival.
"They evidently expect me to begin to-mor[22]row morning. No loss of time." He laughed to himself.
"They clearly expect me to start tomorrow morning. No time to waste." He chuckled to himself.
His trunk and satchel were in his room in a few minutes with all the certainty and punctuality of the imperial-royal service. "Essen fertig!" was soon vociferated up the stairway by the cook Tekla, whose bulky young form Gard had glimpsed in the kitchen. Not sure of being summoned he did not emerge until Ernst tapped on the door—
His suitcase and bag were in his room in no time, just like the reliable service of the imperial-royal transport. "Lunch is ready!" was soon shouted up the stairs by the cook Tekla, whose large young figure Gard had seen in the kitchen. Unsure if he was being called, he didn't come out until Ernst knocked on the door—
"Meester Kirtley, please come to eating."
"Mr. Kirtley, please come to eat."
At table the elder son was introduced—Rudolph, called Rudi, a youth of about Gard's age. There was an unseemly scar on his face and something oblique in his look. Engineering was given as his profession, but he affected the German military strut and was forward and crammed with ready-made conclusions on most subjects. But Herr Bucher reigned here as elsewhere about Villa Elsa as absolute master. He alone spoke with authority. Reverence was first of all due him. Gard soon saw how the wife and children, notwithstanding their stirring presences, were on a secondary plane. How different in the land where he had come from where they are quite free to rule in the house! The sturdy Frau was sub[23]missive, energetically helpful. But in her husband's absence she assumed his stentorian command.
At dinner, the older son was introduced—Rudolph, known as Rudi, a young man about Gard's age. He had an ugly scar on his face and a strange look in his eyes. He claimed to be an engineer but carried himself with a military swagger and was overly opinionated on many topics. However, Herr Bucher ruled the Villa Elsa with complete authority. He was the only one who spoke with weight. Everyone respected him above all. Gard quickly noticed that, despite their lively presence, the wife and kids were in a subordinate position. It was so different from the place he came from, where they had the freedom to take charge at home! The sturdy Frau was sub[23]missive and worked hard to help. But in her husband’s absence, she took on his commanding role.
The manner of eating was frankly informal and ungainly. Evidences of sharp discipline one moment; the next, awkward short-cuts. The Germans have never been able to harmonize these extremes into a medium of easy formality or sightly smoothness. At the Bucher table each one reached across for the food with scarce an apology—a plan jerkily interrupted at times by Tekla, who stuck things at Gard as if she were going to hit him. The strong provender heaped up in abundance, rank in smell and usually unappetizing in color, interfered at first with his hunger. And the drinking was, of course, of a copiousness he had little dreamed of.
The way they ate was really informal and clumsy. One moment there was strict discipline, and the next, they were taking awkward shortcuts. The Germans have never quite managed to blend these extremes into a balanced style that looks smooth and effortless. At the Bucher table, everyone reached across for food without much of an apology—an approach that was occasionally disrupted by Tekla, who would jab food at Gard as if she intended to hit him. The hearty food was piled up in abundance, smelling strong and often unappetizing in color, which initially put a damper on his appetite. And of course, the drinking was much more than he had ever imagined.
The whole effect created a distinctly unsympathetic impression. It ran full tilt against Gard's anticipations. Rebner had led him to expect always the best among the Germans. Were they not the most advanced of humans? Were they not the patterns whom he should model himself after in the laudatory desire for self-improvement? He was naturally curious to see the young lady of the household, all the[24] more as he wondered how she would blend into this blunt picture. She did not appear and he heard no reference to her. But there was a vacant place.
The whole effect created a definitely unsympathetic impression. It completely contradicted Gard's expectations. Rebner had made him believe that the best could always be found among the Germans. Were they not the most advanced of people? Were they not the examples to which he should aspire in his desire for self-improvement? He was naturally curious to see the young lady of the household, especially as he wondered how she would fit into this stark scene. She didn’t show up, and he didn’t hear any mention of her. But there was an empty space.
Much struggling occurred over the mutual endeavors to carry on conversation. With the English which the sons had learned and with Gard's German which he found a strange article on its native ground, headway was made after a fashion. His bloodless American college variety of the language was very weak to buffet about in these billows of idioms and colloquialisms.
Much effort was put into trying to keep the conversation going. The English the sons had learned, along with Gard's German—which he found to be a strange version of the language in its own country—made some progress, although it was awkward. His bland American college version of the language struggled to navigate through these waves of idioms and colloquialisms.
The family, in its emphatic substantiality, was most friendly and eager to please. They urged food and fluid upon him in a way that would have dismayed his Yankee doctor. He found himself eating and drinking to an extent he had never imagined. This sort of thing, he concluded half-despairingly, would either be the making of him or kill him. At home the general fear was about too much. Here satiety, over-satiety, seemed to be the rule as at all German firesides. While he dreaded to think what his abstemious digestive apparatus would do, his new friends took not amiss the bountiful spilling of edibles and[25] liquids upon their napkins spread conspicuously over their breasts. Laundering must be cheap in Germany. That was one good thing.
The family, in their warm generosity, was very friendly and eager to please. They insisted on offering him food and drinks in a way that would have shocked his Yankee doctor. He found himself eating and drinking more than he ever imagined possible. He half-jokingly thought that this either would be the best thing for him or might just kill him. At home, the main concern was about having too much. Here, though, being overly full seemed to be the norm as it was in all German households. While he worried about how his normally restrained stomach would handle this, his new friends took the generous spills of food and liquids on their napkins, which they spread proudly over their chests, in stride. Laundering must be cheap in Germany. That was one good thing.
Gard did not forget that this was represented to be a highly instructed and cultivated circle. The members had graduated from the best schools or held degrees from standard universities. He kept asking himself in what guises the much advertised German excellence was yet to appear in this domestic group whose culture and virtues had been so extolled. If these manners and habits were part of its perfect ripened fruit, then American education and life were indeed obviously blighted. He could not help noticing that all hands had not been necessarily washed before meal-time, and that finger nails were unblushingly uncleaned and unkempt. An accidental glimpse under the immense flowing white beard of his host revealed the absence of a shirt collar, and the neck evidently relied on its untrimmed hairiness as an excuse for not being customarily washed.
Gard didn’t forget that this was supposed to be a highly educated and refined group. The members had graduated from prestigious schools or held degrees from respected universities. He kept wondering when the much-touted German excellence would show itself in this domestic circle whose culture and virtues had been so praised. If these manners and habits were part of its perfectly ripened fruit, then American education and life were clearly in a bad state. He couldn’t help noticing that not everyone had necessarily washed their hands before mealtime, and that fingernails were unapologetically dirty and unkempt. A casual glance under the large flowing white beard of his host revealed the absence of a shirt collar, and the neck evidently relied on its untrimmed hairiness as an excuse for not being regularly washed.
It became apparent to Kirtley after a month that personal cleanness and neatness in Germany were not particularly considered[26] as next to godliness. The gold braid, spick and span uniforms and other showy gear, were apt to cover dirty bodies and soiled underwear. Alas, the Germans could not wash in beer. He wondered why his old enthusiastic mentor had never given him a hint of these things. Likely he did not know. Distance often increases eloquence in proportion as it breeds ignorance.
It became clear to Kirtley after a month that personal cleanliness and neatness in Germany weren't really seen as next to godliness. The flashy gold braid, perfectly pressed uniforms, and other showy gear often covered up dirty bodies and stained underwear. Unfortunately, the Germans couldn’t wash with beer. He wondered why his old enthusiastic mentor had never mentioned any of this. Probably, he just didn’t know. Distance often makes grand statements as it breeds ignorance.
With the exhilaration of the bounteous meal, however, Gard's spirits rose to a height he had not known in a long time. If conversation languished over the stony roads of the duality of expression, glasses were clinked together again and a new topic was hopefully started. When it seemed proper to him that the end of the repast should be in sight, a new course would be brought in, usually accompanied boisterously by the two family dogs, including the ferocious beast who had given Gard the shivers. The animals conducted themselves with a ravenous freedom around the board, alternately being petted and fed and allowed to lick plates, only to be in turn kicked out and shrieked after, with a chair occasionally upset in the rumpus. This habit of kicking animals, things and per[27]sons Gard later observed was prevalent among the Teutons, whose appropriate fondness for conveniently big boots and large stout shoes at the same time discourages any vanity about small feet. It is a part of their military predilection.
With the excitement of the plentiful meal, Gard's spirits soared to a level he hadn't experienced in a long time. If conversation lagged over the rocky paths of expressing thoughts, glasses were clinked once more, and a new topic was hopefully introduced. Just when he thought the end of the meal was approaching, a new course would be brought in, often accompanied by the two family dogs, including the fierce one that had given Gard chills. The animals moved around the table with a wild enthusiasm, being petted and fed while also allowed to lick plates, only to be kicked out and chased away, sometimes causing a chair to topple during the chaos. Gard later noticed that this tendency to kick animals, objects, and people was common among the Germans, whose affection for conveniently big boots and sturdy shoes simultaneously discourages any pride in having small feet. It reflects their military inclination.
At the end of a couple of hours dinner was brought to a close. Fräulein had not yet put in an appearance, and it now came out that she was "at lesson." She must have stayed for another class. After his gastronomic feat Gard did not know whether he felt sick or never better in his life. What's more, he did not seem to care, his senses were so pleasantly numbed.
At the end of a couple of hours, dinner wrapped up. Fräulein hadn’t shown up yet, and it turned out she was "in class." She must have stayed for another lesson. After his culinary adventure, Gard wasn’t sure if he felt sick or if he’d never felt better in his life. What’s more, he didn’t seem to mind; his senses were pleasantly dulled.
On his way up to his room, in the dim hall, he caught sight of a young woman hanging up her wrap. Mussed strands of straw-colored hair shone down her shoulders and sent a sudden thrill of gladness through his veins. He had never seen but one Wagner opera and that was "The Twilight of the Gods," with its aureate Rhine maidens bathing in that delicious revelry of divine music. The arrival at last of the daughter of the house, as he assumed this was, brought back a flash of all that golden loveliness.[28]
On his way up to his room, in the dim hallway, he noticed a young woman hanging up her coat. Messy strands of golden hair cascaded down her shoulders, sending a rush of excitement through him. He had only seen one Wagner opera, "The Twilight of the Gods," with its beautiful Rhine maidens enjoying the delightful celebration of divine music. The arrival of what he assumed was the daughter of the house brought back a flash of all that golden beauty.[28]
In his sleep that first night, vast trenchers of food and tankards of drink disported in happy confusion with goddesses blond and magical.
In his sleep that first night, huge platters of food and mugs of drink mingled playfully with beautiful, magical goddesses.
CHAPTER V
Family Life
THE matter of much eating and drinking had first to be, if possible, disposed of. It was exacting and the most important affair. Kirtley did not want to be discourteous or appear unappreciative. He had come to Germany to do as the superior Germans do. His digestive tract was on the narrow-gage American plan. Theirs was broad-gage, with their surpassing organisms.
THE issue of eating and drinking had to be dealt with first, if possible. It was a demanding and crucial matter. Kirtley didn't want to be rude or seem ungrateful. He came to Germany to follow the customs of the superior Germans. His digestive system was designed for the narrow American way. Theirs was built for a more accommodating experience, thanks to their superior physiology.
At the Buchers Gard had manfully to face six meals a day. Must he be swamped in order to put the desirable adipose tissue on his bones? By all the laws of American dieting and Prohibition the German race should have been destroyed by indigestion and drunkenness centuries ago. But here they were more flourishing than ever—the generally acknowledged nation of masters!
At the Buchers Gard, one had to bravely tackle six meals a day. Did he really need to drown in food just to add some healthy fat to his body? According to all the rules of American dieting and Prohibition, Germans should have been wiped out by indigestion and alcoholism centuries ago. But here they were, thriving more than ever—the widely recognized nation of masters!
And his bed—the German bed. He could[30] not remember whether Mark Twain ever described it, but he should have. Gard's haven of rest appeared to lie on solid foundations. It was constructed with German stability. There were as many blankets in summer as in winter.
And his bed—the German bed. He couldn’t[30] remember if Mark Twain ever talked about it, but he really should have. Gard's place of rest seemed to be built on solid foundations. It was made with German stability. There were as many blankets in the summer as there were in the winter.
Worst of all, two immense feather pillows lay across its middle. The only place for them seemed to be on his sorely tried stomach or on the floor. In a month an attack of insomnia resulted. For hours at night he lay awake, listening to the frequent rain on the roof or the wind whining Teutonically in the leaves of his linden.
Worst of all, two huge feather pillows were placed across its middle. The only options for them seemed to be on his painfully pressed stomach or on the floor. Within a month, he developed insomnia. For hours at night, he lay awake, listening to the constant rain on the roof or the wind whining intensely through the leaves of his linden tree.
In his initial troubles and anxieties he went to a German doctor. This spectacled wise man prescribed more beer. German physicians seemed to be in league with the brewers. Gard was of the kind who would suffer rather than complain. So he worried along.
In his early struggles and worries, he saw a German doctor. This wise man with glasses suggested he drink more beer. German doctors seemed to have a close relationship with the brewers. Gard was the type who would rather endure than complain. So he kept worrying.
He did not fall in with the urgent, conscientious assumption of the Buchers that he would at once want to begin driving away at "lessons." His hosts reminded him openly at times that his prospective teachers were still waiting, still recommending themselves. Responsibility was evidently felt for his pro[31]gramme of work. He realized that he was somewhat disappointing, for instruction, education, is such a pushing, unceasing business with the Germans. It may be said they never finish school.
He didn’t go along with the urgent and diligent assumption of the Buchers that he would immediately want to start focusing on "lessons." His hosts occasionally reminded him that his potential teachers were still waiting and still promoting themselves. There was a clear sense of responsibility for his program of work. He understood that he was a bit of a disappointment because teaching and education are such a relentless, ongoing affair with the Germans. One could say they never truly finish school.
Yet he wished first to take a good look at the historic city, its celebrated art treasures. He wanted to make a few excursions in the environs before the winter set in with its dampness and gloom. Besides, he never before had had a chance at fine opera, at fine symphonies and music recitals.
Yet he wanted to take a good look at the historic city and its famous art treasures first. He aimed to make a few trips to the surrounding areas before winter brought its dampness and gloom. Besides, he had never had the opportunity to experience great opera, fine symphonies, and music recitals before.
"But ought not Herr Kirtley at least begin with the free evening lectures?"—with which Dresden shone through the illuminations of many profound and oracular professors in lofty pulpits. He submitted that his German was too feeble of wing to enable him to soar into the heights of such wisdom.
"But shouldn't Herr Kirtley at least start with the free evening lectures?"—where Dresden lit up with the illuminations of many deep and wise professors in high pulpits. He claimed that his German was too weak to let him reach the heights of such knowledge.
The zest in Germany for learning and accomplishments was truly wonderful to him. Half his life of instruction now quickly seemed to have been idling. As far as industriousness, drilling, well-defined ambitiousness, were concerned, the young German had many advantages.
The enthusiasm in Germany for learning and achievements was really impressive to him. Half of his life spent teaching now felt like it had been wasted. When it came to hard work, training, and clear ambition, the young German had a lot of benefits.
The modest Bucher household was run edu[32]cationally with the dynamic regularity of military establishments. It was, of course, no exception. Lessons and lectures commenced mornings at eight, with Sundays partly included. This routine begins with the German child at six.
The humble Bucher household was managed with the structured efficiency of a military operation. It was certainly no different. Classes and discussions started each morning at eight, including part of Sundays. This routine begins for the German child at six.
Evenings, too, had their busy duties. No baseball, no tennis, no lazy days of swimming and fishing. Playtime was spent in martial exercise, in evenings at the opera or seeing the classical dramas of all races and epochs on the stage. Gard became aware that the Bucher children had carried six or seven studies at an age when he had thought he was abused, overburdened, with four.
Evenings also had their important tasks. No baseball, no tennis, no lazy days by the pool or fishing. Free time was dedicated to martial training, attending the opera, or watching classic plays from different cultures and time periods on stage. Gard realized that the Bucher kids had taken on six or seven subjects at an age when he thought he was being pushed too hard with just four.
Besides, their courses were more mature. And yet he had come to Germany, despite Rebner's eulogiums of the Germans, with the complacent idea that, as he was the respectable American average, he could look the other youth of the world in the face unashamed, asking no odds.
Besides, their courses were more advanced. And yet he had come to Germany, despite Rebner's praises of the Germans, with the overconfident belief that, as he was the typical respectable American, he could face the other youth of the world without shame, asking for no special treatment.
Little Ernst at fifteen was studying, among numerous things, philosophy and didactic religion. The way he could cite facts and carry on a discussion on these and similar subjects!
Little Ernst, at fifteen, was studying many things, including philosophy and teaching religion. The way he could quote facts and engage in discussions on these topics and similar ones was impressive!
"What part do philosophy and religion play[33] in our system of instruction for the young?" Gard asked himself with a deprecatory smile. "Is it a miracle that the Germans can teach us desirable knowledge and morals, as Rebner insists?"
"What role do philosophy and religion play[33] in our education system for young people?" Gard mused with a self-deprecating smile. "Is it really so surprising that the Germans can teach us valuable knowledge and ethics, as Rebner claims?"
Kirtley readily perceived that he had scarcely sufficient precise information to discuss intelligently general topics with this boy. The latter could always quote some acknowledged and ponderous authority—German, of course, and all the more awe-inspiring, but of whom Gard had not heard. For it usually came down to the question, Who are your authorities? He rarely could tell who his were. They promptly faded away before all the weight and definiteness Ernst could bring to bear.
Kirtley quickly realized that he barely had enough solid information to discuss general topics intelligently with this boy. The boy could always reference some well-known and heavy authority—German, of course—which made it even more impressive, but someone Gard had never heard of. It usually boiled down to the question, Who are your authorities? He rarely knew who his were. They quickly disappeared in comparison to all the weight and certainty Ernst could bring to the conversation.
While Rudolph and Ernst were so far along as a result of a busy adolescence, Fräulein Elsa, as Gard discovered, was in her way not behind. She knew English and French pretty well and was quite an accomplished musician, able to play from memory on the winged Pleyel almost whole books of classic music. She could paint fairly well in oil and was now taking up etching with enthusiastic assiduity. She could sew, cook, run the house.[34] In brief, her days were as full as her brothers' in propelling tasks. She, apparently, did not have "boys on the brain."
While Rudolph and Ernst were making great strides thanks to a busy adolescence, Fräulein Elsa, as Gard discovered, was equally accomplished in her own way. She was quite proficient in English and French and was a talented musician, able to play almost entire books of classical music from memory on the winged Pleyel. She could also paint reasonably well in oil and was now enthusiastically taking up etching. She was skilled at sewing, cooking, and managing the household.[34] In short, her days were as full of tasks as her brothers'. She, it seemed, did not have "boys on the brain."
Kirtley threw up his hands in imitation of his venerated professor. This was just an ordinary German miss. He had scarcely dreamed of such things in a girl.
Kirtley threw up his hands, mimicking his respected professor. This was just a regular German girl. He had barely imagined such things in a girl.
It was all illustrated by Gard's piano playing, which was cheap and meaningless strumming. He could rattle through a lot of popular tunes and stumble through a few short simple school-girl salon pieces. The Buchers were a real orchestra. With the ladies at the piano, the old Herr at the flute, Ernst at the violin and Rudi at the 'cello, they could play a dozen programmes and furnish enjoyment for the listener.
It was all shown in Gard's piano playing, which was just cheap and pointless strumming. He could rush through a lot of popular songs and fumble through a few simple schoolgirl pieces. The Buchers were a real orchestra. With the ladies on piano, the old man on flute, Ernst on violin, and Rudi on cello, they could perform a dozen programs and provide enjoyment for the audience.
And always salutary, enlightened, cultivated music. The house reverberated with a multitude of choice enduring arias, sung, hummed or whistled, and this made Villa Elsa almost take on a charm for Gard. He had not known how his melodious soul was starved.
And always uplifting, inspiring, refined music. The house echoed with a variety of timeless arias, sung, hummed, or whistled, and this made Villa Elsa seem almost enchanting to Gard. He hadn't realized how much his musical soul was craving this.
Why should not the Germans be expected to have noble souls with all the wealth of distinguished, inspiring music flowing through their lives? Should it not give them neces[35]sarily a strong, desirable spirit, fortify them in healthy aspirations, encourage them to get the best out of existence? This incentive and pleasureableness, making for the good, the true and the beautiful—must it not contribute a deep richness and righteousness to the Teuton heart?
Why shouldn't we expect Germans to have noble souls with all the amazing and inspiring music that surrounds them? Shouldn't it naturally give them a strong, positive spirit, strengthen their healthy ambitions, and motivate them to make the most of life? This inspiration and enjoyment, aimed at the good, the true, and the beautiful—doesn't it add deep richness and goodness to the German heart?
And is it to be wondered at—the Germans' big supply of red blood? For the strength of the Teuton's body, Gard observed, was built up, maintained, in equal measure with his other training. The military drilling and strenuous gymnastics provided him with straight shoulders, a full chest, a sound spine, strength of limb—in short, good, presentable health.
And is it really surprising that the Germans have such a lot of red blood? Gard noticed that the strength of the German body was built up and maintained just as much as through his other training. The military drills and intense workouts gave him straight shoulders, a broad chest, a strong back, and powerful limbs—in short, a healthy and fit appearance.
The Bucher fireside had no doctor, no adored specialists, hanging about. It had been taught to handle simple complaints itself. Medical and surgical bills did not upset its modest financial equilibrium. The family were extraordinarily well. Their brawn, energetically looked after as well as the brain, accounted partly for their marvelous appetites.
The Bucher household didn't have a doctor or any beloved specialists around. They had learned to manage minor health issues on their own. Medical and surgical bills didn’t disturb their balanced budget. The family was in excellent health. Their physical strength, taken care of just as much as their mental well-being, contributed to their incredible appetites.
So nothing seemed to Gard to be missed in this potent scheme of instruction and Kultur.
So nothing seemed to Gard to be lacking in this powerful plan of teaching and Kultur.
CHAPTER VI
The House
OFTEN when he peeked down from his attic window he spied the shining bald head of the very elderly Herr Bucher surrounded by the mass of lively colors of his rose garden. He loved to spend hours there in the sunshine with his posies, tying up their branches, clipping choice specimens with which he was fond of decorating the members of Villa Elsa, its dining table, its living room. Roses, roses, everywhere.
OFTEN when he looked down from his attic window, he saw the shiny bald head of the very old Herr Bucher among the vibrant colors of his rose garden. He enjoyed spending hours there in the sun with his flowers, tying up their branches and clipping special ones that he liked to use for decorating the residents of Villa Elsa, its dining table, and its living room. Roses, roses, everywhere.
It was his hobby, this spot of blossoms, and in it his short, bulky form, so whitened by his Jovian beard meerschaumed by the stains from his huge, curving German pipe, was often almost lost to view. He was like some droll gnome waddling about in a flower patch. Frequently someone had to be sent to find him among all those pets which he knew so well by their Latin and popular names and[37] by their characteristics. While he grumbled and so often stormed about in the house, speaking always in gruff tones of command, he was quite sunny out there in his plot, although still guttural and dictatorial.
It was his hobby, this patch of flowers, and in it his short, stocky build, so white from his Jupiter-like beard stained by his large, curved German pipe, was often nearly hidden from view. He was like a quirky gnome waddling around in a garden. Often, someone had to be sent to find him among all those pets, which he knew so well by their Latin and common names and[37] by their traits. While he grumbled and frequently erupted with anger in the house, always speaking in gruff commanding tones, he was quite cheerful out there in his garden, although still rough and authoritative.
He was a retired professor of phonetics and diction, but now and then prepared a pupil. This was how he had met his wife a long, long time before, when she was a young singer. She was twenty years his junior and had become so completely a housewife that you could scarcely associate her with any art. She was fat, harsh, homely, masculine in the way of German women, an occasional long hair sticking from her face in emulation of a beard.
He was a retired professor of phonetics and diction, but occasionally he would coach a student. That was how he had met his wife many years ago when she was a young singer. She was twenty years younger than him and had become such a devoted housewife that it was hard to link her to any artistic pursuits. She was overweight, unrefined, plain, and had a somewhat masculine appearance like some German women, with a stray long hair sticking out from her face like a beard.
Devoid of any graces of seduction, putting out her heavy fists in every direction she exhibited a bearish kindness toward Gard that seemed calculated at first to frighten him. She was loud-voiced, iron-jawed. One of her favorite boasts was that she had never been to a dentist. She pulled out her rarely aching teeth, or some one of the family pulled them for her.
Devoid of any charm, she swung her heavy fists in every direction, showing a rough kindness towards Gard that seemed designed to intimidate him at first. She had a loud voice and a strong jaw. One of her favorite claims was that she had never been to a dentist. She pulled out her teeth, which hardly ever hurt, or someone in her family did it for her.
The Herr could be smoother and he assumed a fatherly solicitude over Gard, look[38]ing out for his advantages, anxious that he should make progress. But Bucher evidently was annoyed at times by not having authority in the matter of the slow way in which his young guest set about with his "studies." Kirtley had not come to study, had not been trained to study, in the German sense. It would have been difficult to make the old man see any virtue in such desultoriness. It doubtless proved to his mind that Americans are only half trained, half tamed, half domesticated.
The Herr could be more accommodating and he took on a fatherly care for Gard, looking out for his best interests, eager for him to make progress. However, Bucher seemed to get annoyed at times by not having control over how slowly his young guest approached his "studies." Kirtley hadn’t come to study and hadn’t been trained to study in the German way. It would have been hard to make the old man see any value in such aimlessness. It likely confirmed his belief that Americans are only half trained, half tamed, and half domesticated.
The couple surrounded Kirtley with a protection, an honesty, a reliability, a zeal, that was as surprising as it was, on the whole, gratifying. He felt a security he had hardly known in his own home. If he were cheated or otherwise imposed upon anywhere in Dresden—and this did not often happen—the Buchers were violently up in arms about it and never ceased pursuit of the recreant until the wrong was righted.
The couple surrounded Kirtley with a sense of protection, honesty, reliability, and enthusiasm that was both surprising and, overall, satisfying. He felt a sense of security he had rarely experienced in his own home. If he were ever cheated or mistreated anywhere in Dresden—and that didn’t happen often—the Buchers were fiercely determined to defend him and wouldn’t stop until the situation was resolved.
"The good German name must not be tarnished."
"The good German name should not be spoiled."
In a word, they tried to treat him like a son; and so forceful and constant were their efforts in this direction that he sometimes[39] wished their well-meant attentions were less formidable. The easy American "forget it," "why bother," "never again," were expressions of a mood unfamiliar to them. They visibly had small patience with such slackness which only, to their minds, encouraged lawlessness.
In short, they tried to treat him like a son; and their attempts were so intense and persistent that sometimes[39] he wished their good intentions were less overwhelming. The casual American phrases "forget it," "why bother," and "never again" were expressions they weren't used to. They clearly had little patience for that kind of laxity, which only, in their view, encouraged disorder.
The setting for Gard's approaching German love affair was appropriately picturesque and propitious. A tight little meadow, with a grassy path wandering through by the Elbe, lay near at hand, and beyond, at the right, a pine wood—the Waldpark—with neat graveled walks and rustic seats where the tonic air was often to brace his musings.
The setting for Gard's upcoming German romance was perfectly charming and favorable. A cozy little meadow, with a grassy path meandering by the Elbe, was close by, and beyond that, to the right, was a pine forest—the Waldpark—complete with well-maintained gravel paths and rustic benches where the refreshing air often invigorated his thoughts.
Adjacent was the small summer house, still poetically standing, where Schiller wrote "Don Carlos" a century and a quarter before. A leafy lane led from the meadow to the walled garden inclosure of Villa Elsa, whose branches, vines and flowering bushes insisted on making it almost a hidden retreat. The spot could not be more gemütlich—that familiar expressive word which Kirtley soon learned to rely on amid the scant artillery of his defensive weapons of conversational German.
Adjacent was the small summer house, still charmingly standing, where Schiller wrote "Don Carlos" a century and a quarter earlier. A leafy lane led from the meadow to the walled garden of Villa Elsa, whose branches, vines, and flowering bushes insisted on making it almost a hidden retreat. The spot couldn’t be more gemütlich—that familiar expressive word which Kirtley soon learned to rely on amid the limited resources of his conversational German.
Through a swinging gate in the wall, and[40] usually to the clanging of a bell that announced you, you entered the house on a level with the ground. On this floor were the kitchen and dining room. Next came the belle étage, with the salon and music room opening into each other, and with another apartment or two. Above, the chambers. And still above, the two attic rooms. All was plain but substantial.
Through a swinging gate in the wall, and[40] usually to the clanging of a bell that announced your arrival, you entered the house at ground level. On this floor were the kitchen and dining room. Next was the belle étage, with the living room and music room opening into each other, along with another room or two. Above were the bedrooms. And even higher, the two attic rooms. Everything was simple but solid.
The garden furnished not only flowers but vegetables. And in one corner stood a table and chairs for afternoon tea with cakes or beer with cheese. Here the ever-busy sewing and knitting mainly went on in summer, and a forgotten book, half read, was usually left by some one of the young folks. There was a drowsy, old-fashioned air about the premises that recalled illustrations in some of the editions of Grimm's fairy tales.
The garden had not just flowers but vegetables too. In one corner, there was a table and chairs for afternoon tea with cakes or beer and cheese. This is where the non-stop sewing and knitting mostly happened during the summer, and a half-read book was often left behind by one of the young people. The place had a sleepy, old-fashioned vibe that reminded you of illustrations from some editions of Grimm's fairy tales.
Aside from the abundance of bound music, Gard had been far from expecting that fine examples of art and literature would be so meagerly represented in this representative German home. There were poor pictures of Bismarck, of William the Second, and of his grandfather aping the appearance of Gambrinus.
Aside from the wealth of sheet music, Gard had not anticipated that great examples of art and literature would be so poorly represented in this typical German home. There were mediocre portraits of Bismarck, William the Second, and his grandfather trying to mimic the look of Gambrinus.
[41]Prominent also were steel engravings of Saxon and Prussian kings of whom Kirtley had never heard. But there they were, conspicuous household gods, with fierce, epic miens and lordly bodies, surrounded by wreaths of glory and Latin texts, and supported by cannon pointed at the observer with menaces of angry welcome. And not to be forgotten were the august thrones, avenging swords of royalty, and the dark swirling clouds suggesting the German Olympus.
[41]There were also impressive steel engravings of Saxon and Prussian kings that Kirtley had never heard of. But there they were, obvious household icons, with fierce, heroic expressions and regal bodies, surrounded by wreaths of glory and Latin inscriptions, and flanked by cannons aimed at the viewer with threats of fierce hospitality. And we mustn't overlook the grand thrones, the vengeful swords of royalty, and the dark swirling clouds hinting at the German Olympus.
"It all harmonizes with the arsenal down in the entrance," muttered Gard.
"It all fits perfectly with the gear at the entrance," muttered Gard.
As for books, he was taken at an angle still more unexpected and significant. Goethe and Schiller and the other old Teuton classics, breathing of liberalness and freedom—figures that had always stood out in the world as leading exponents and guardians of a cultured enlightenment—were only present in the Bucher home in the form of musty, unused volumes.
As for books, he found himself in an even more surprising and meaningful situation. Goethe, Schiller, and other classic German writers, who embodied liberalism and freedom—figures that had always been seen as top representatives and protectors of cultured enlightenment—were only found in the Bucher home as dusty, untouched volumes.
These authors, who were so loved, advocated and expounded in American colleges and whom Kirtley had come to Germany to know better and to worship, were scarcely ever mentioned. He was astonished to find that the Germans thought little of them. And Heine[42] likewise, that naughty child of the Vaterland! At the Buchers the presentable red and gilt edition of his poems was kept in Fräulein's escritoire in her room.
These authors, who were so admired, taught and lectured in American colleges, and whom Kirtley had come to Germany to learn more about and idolize, were hardly ever mentioned. He was shocked to discover that the Germans thought very little of them. And Heine[42], that mischievous child of the homeland! At the Buchers, the nice red and gold edition of his poems was kept in the young lady's desk in her room.
American education, Gard began to realize, was somehow on the wrong track here. It was trying to cultivate a Germany that no longer seemed to exist. It was diligently teaching and acclaiming Teutons who were repudiated in their own land. It was separating the spirit and taste of the two peoples instead of bringing them together.
American education, Gard started to see, was definitely off course. It was trying to nurture a Germany that didn't seem to be around anymore. It was thoroughly teaching and praising Germans who were rejected in their own country. It was creating a divide between the spirit and taste of the two cultures instead of uniting them.
The books that were in evidence in Villa Elsa were a new lot, excepting the great and formidable Nietschke. Kirtley had never heard of the Treitschkes and Bernhardis and Hartmanns, whom the Buchers were reading and quoting.
The books that were on display in Villa Elsa were a new collection, aside from the great and powerful Nietzsche. Kirtley had never heard of the Treitschkes, Bernhardis, and Hartmanns that the Buchers were reading and quoting.
From what he made out, these and similar authorities were insisting mightily on German conceptions and prerogatives—some exalting the Teuton supremacy of will, others urging and preparing the mental ground for an armed attack on the world for a German dictatorship. This militant literature was introduced here by Rudolph, who was armed with strategic plans, diagrams, military maps, which the[43] family frequently of an evening pored over with the enthusiasm of a parlor game. First it was Russia to be assaulted, then Belgium, and always France.
From what he gathered, these and similar authorities were strongly emphasizing German ideas and rights—some glorifying the superiority of the German will, while others were fostering the mindset for a military strike aimed at establishing a German dictatorship. This aggressive literature was brought here by Rudolph, who came equipped with strategic plans, diagrams, and military maps, which the[43] family often studied together in the evenings, treating it like an engaging game. First up was Russia to be attacked, then Belgium, and always France.
"Italy is already as good as conquered," Rudi proclaimed, "and England simply needs to be tilted off her worm-eaten perch by a sudden shock."
"Italy is practically conquered," Rudi declared, "and England just needs to be knocked off her rotting perch by a sudden shock."
Kirtley rubbed his eyes. What a widespread, horrible butchery was being nursed and nourished here in this obscure family of peace? Surely this good folk did not appreciate the meaning of it all. Was it not merely something awfully exciting to talk about, argue about, puzzle over, in the prosaic humdrum at this respectable hearthstone?
Kirtley rubbed his eyes. What a widespread, terrible slaughter was being supported and fostered here in this quiet family of peace? Surely these good people didn’t grasp the significance of it all. Wasn’t it just something incredibly thrilling to discuss, debate, and ponder over in the mundane routine at this respectable home?
Such a strange form of social entertainment! The "arsenal" below always came to Gard's mind. These people acted as if they were actually thinking of capturing the whole Eastern Hemisphere, speaking as if they were going to rule it like conquerors, going to enforce at the point of the blade German "might," "will," "rights." These were the common expressions used. Kirtley thought the household must be unbalanced on this topic.
Such a weird way of social entertainment! The "arsenal" below always popped into Gard's mind. These people behaved like they were actually thinking about taking over the entire Eastern Hemisphere, talking as if they were going to rule it like conquerors, ready to impose German "might," "will," and "rights" at the tip of a sword. Those were the usual phrases used. Kirtley felt like the household must have been a bit off about this issue.
He said to himself, "No one else whom I[44] have read or heard of is contemplating such a campaign. Other races are holding forth on the benefits and glories of peace. These Dresden Germans are talking of the benefits and glories of war!"
He said to himself, "No one else that I[44] have read or heard about is thinking about such a campaign. Other races are discussing the advantages and triumphs of peace. These Dresden Germans are talking about the advantages and triumphs of war!"
This example in these simple, every-day Buchers was most pointed. Their lines were furthest from the military. Teaching diction and phonetics to women and male singers, studying engineering, religion and the gentle arts, had nothing to do with such proposed bloody belligerence.
This example in these simple, everyday Buchers was very clear. Their roles were far from military. Teaching language and pronunciation to women and male singers, studying engineering, religion, and the fine arts had nothing to do with such suggested violent conflict.
Only Rudi could be called somewhat martial. Hydraulics was his branch, and his frequent absences on missions about which he assumed an important and mystifying air, such as is, for that matter, usual in bumptious young men, never caused any comment or visible interest on the part of the others. He gave himself out to be close to the militaire, familiar with its secrets, as he freely blew his cigarette smoke across the meal table; and to him the family deferred on these subjects. Surely all this was to Gard very foreign and interesting.
Only Rudi could be described as somewhat military. Hydraulics was his field, and his frequent missions, which he treated with an air of importance and mystery—common among overly confident young men—never sparked any comments or noticeable interest from the others. He claimed to be close to the military, familiar with its secrets, as he casually puffed his cigarette smoke across the dining table; the family looked up to him on these topics. Surely all of this was quite foreign and intriguing to Gard.
"What a different race of beings! What a curious revelation to observe, what a doughty complex to comprehend!"
"What a different kind of people! What a strange thing to notice, what a tough concept to understand!"
[45]He was more confounded by the attitude of the women. They were even fiercer than the men. To them the other Europeans were a wholly bad lot. Those neighbors were so much in the way of the good, all-worthy Germans. But it was on the English that this feminine hatred vented itself most turbulently. Frau Bucher shouted that she would be more than glad—she would be hilarious—if war came.
[45]He was even more confused by the women's attitude. They were fiercer than the men. To them, the other Europeans were completely bad news. Those neighbors were a huge obstacle to the good, deserving Germans. But it was the English who received the brunt of this feminine anger. Frau Bucher exclaimed that she would be more than happy—she would be thrilled—if war broke out.
"I would wear my last rag for years, see my two boys dead on the battle front, if Gross Britain could be knocked into the bottom of the sea."
"I would wear my last rag for years, watch my two boys die on the battlefield, if Great Britain could be sunk into the bottom of the sea."
Was all this a part of that national gladness Gard was observing in Germany and could not gage, could not yet give an explicit and sufficient reason for? Those old-time Teuton liberals, masters of prose and verse—how would they feel at home in this modern Rhineland of hysterical spleen and arms provocative? Was it possible he had really come on a sort of fool's errand?
Was all this part of the national happiness Gard was seeing in Germany but couldn’t understand, couldn’t yet pinpoint a clear reason for? Those old-school Teuton liberals, experts in writing and poetry—how would they react in this modern Rhineland filled with emotional outbursts and provocations? Was it possible he had actually come on a kind of pointless mission?
CHAPTER VII
German Love
FRÄULEIN ELSA was a blooming, almost blue-eyed young woman of twenty. Such a fresh, strawberry and cream complexion under a plenteous harvest of flaxen hair would not be associated in America with anyone very serious. There she would have been thought arrayed by Nature as a tearing blonde, suitable for the equivocal light stage, or as a frivolous artist's model, or as promenade girl in a suit and cloak house. But in Fräulein the extraordinary combination of volatile comeliness and unimpeachable earnestness daily worked growing wonders in Kirtley.
FMiss Elsa was a vibrant, almost blue-eyed young woman of twenty. With her fresh, strawberry and cream complexion paired with a thick mane of flaxen hair, she wouldn't be seen as very serious in America. There, people would think of her as an alluring blonde, fit for the ambiguous stage, or a lighthearted artist's model, or just a stylish girl out for a stroll. However, in Fräulein, the remarkable mix of her captivating beauty and undeniable seriousness was creating remarkable changes in Kirtley every day.
It is a luckless young traveler who does not find himself or herself engaged in some romance, permanent or transient, which ever after sweetens or gilds the memories of the tour. Moreover Gard was at an age when[47] youthful susceptibilities were softened by the lackadaisicalness of his returning state of health and hope.
It’s an unfortunate young traveler who doesn’t find themselves caught up in some romance, whether lasting or fleeting, that sweetens or enhances the memories of their journey. Furthermore, Gard was at an age when[47] his youthful sensitivities were softened by the laid-back vibe of his recovering health and optimism.
So his difficulties with the German language, feasting, sleeping and redoubtable ways in general, were to be complicated by German loving. The shining object of his tenderness—how she was to lend brightness to the short dismal days and long black nights of the Teuton winter! At first he had asked himself:
So his struggles with the German language, eating, sleeping, and tough situations in general were about to get more complicated by being in love with a German girl. The shining object of his affection—how she would bring light to the short, gloomy days and long, dark nights of the German winter! At first, he had wondered:
"Is a campaign of the heart in Deutschland as portentous, dreadfully systematic, a proceeding as the other undertakings? Do the Germans go at that sort of thing, too, hammer and tongs?"
"Is a campaign driven by passion in Germany as significant, frighteningly organized, and methodical as the other efforts? Do the Germans tackle that kind of thing with the same intensity?"
The glowing Fräulein was able-bodied, full-chested, with every golden promise of a rich maternityhood. Did American girls have any bosoms to speak of? Gard seemed now to have never noticed that feature in them. Yet bounding breasts are the unashamed pride of German girls.
The glowing young woman was fit, well-endowed, and had all the signs of a fruitful motherhood. Did American girls even have anything notable in that department? Gard now seemed to have never noticed that trait in them. Yet, full breasts are the proud badge of German girls.
While the Yankee miss is often to be identified by complaints of a physical nature, Elsa had no aches or pains to talk about. She had a strength competent to support all her ener[48]getic, meritorious endeavors. A thoroughly well woman—what an exceptional being, a god-send! It is not the fashion with maids beyond the Rhine to be ailing. Weak backs, nervous prostration, indigestion and similar indispositions were not topics at the Buchers'. To be coquettishly delicate or romantically ill is a liability to the Germans. Health, unenchanting as it may be, is a prime asset. That the Teuton women are gormands—what is that compared with their willingness to mother six or more sturdy youngsters?
While the Yankee woman is often recognized by her physical complaints, Elsa had no aches or pains to discuss. She had a strength capable of supporting all her energetic, worthy efforts. A completely healthy woman—what an extraordinary person, a true blessing! It's not typical for young women beyond the Rhine to be unwell. Issues like weak backs, nervous exhaustion, indigestion, and similar ailments were not subjects at the Buchers'. Being whimsically delicate or romantically sick is seen as a disadvantage to the Germans. Health, as dull as it may seem, is a key asset. The fact that German women enjoy eating—what does that matter compared to their willingness to raise six or more strong children?
Had Frau Bucher been an Elsa at twenty? Yes, in the main, yet impossible to conceive. Would Elsa become at fifty-five like her parent? Heaven forbid! But Youth ignores such deterrent probabilities.
Had Frau Bucher been an Elsa at twenty? Yes, mostly, but it’s hard to imagine. Would Elsa become like her mother at fifty-five? God forbid! But youth overlooks such discouraging possibilities.
The daughter and her manifold achievements easily bowled Gard over. Was he in love or did he merely imagine he was? Was he filling with the divine fire or only being smitten? Who could ever tell? And what is, in fact, the practical difference? Kindly old Rebner had hinted that it would not be amiss in Gard to bring home one of the excellent German mädchens with her brimming stock of health and efficiency.
The daughter and her many accomplishments completely impressed Gard. Was he in love, or was he just imagining it? Was he feeling something profound, or was he just infatuated? Who could really know? And what’s the actual difference? Kind old Rebner had suggested that it wouldn't hurt Gard to bring home one of the excellent German mädchens with her abundant health and energy.
[49]"She would be an answer to our American servant girl question, flood your fireside with invigorating music, and rear a house full of robust children. It would be a novel and commendable experiment and experience for you, Kirtley."
[49] "She would solve our American servant girl issue, bring lively music to your home, and raise a house full of healthy kids. It would be a unique and admirable experiment and experience for you, Kirtley."
Of course Heine is the approved route with a German girl. Gard borrowed from Fräulein an old copy of the "Buch der Lieder." Very obliging at times like the rest of the family in the business of improving his accent, she urged that if he would commit some of those little prized poems to heart, she would supervise his intonations. He eagerly betook himself to this charming exercise, and it was not long before he was inviting her to walk along that alluring path through the meadow by the persuasive water. Here he repeated over and over to her the very pertinent lines,
Of course, Heine is the go-to choice with a German girl. Gard borrowed an old copy of the "Buch der Lieder" from Fräulein. Being helpful, like the rest of her family in trying to improve his accent, she suggested that if he memorized some of those cherished poems, she would help him with his pronunciation. He eagerly took on this delightful task, and it wasn’t long before he was asking her to stroll along that enchanting path through the meadow by the inviting water. Here, he constantly recited to her the most relevant lines,
Thou'rt like unto a flower,
You're like a flower,
and
and
Thou lov'st me not, thou lov'st me not,
You don't love me, you don't love me,
under the conscientious reproofs of her engaging diction.
under the thoughtful criticism of her charming language.
[50]But never more than for half an hour at a time. This was all she could spare him. Her days were very strictly divided by her pressing concerns. A sightly young woman so tremendously busy—it was almost exasperating.
[50]But never for more than half an hour at a time. That was all she could give him. Her days were tightly scheduled with her urgent tasks. A pretty young woman so incredibly busy—it was almost frustrating.
And he could not establish any tender quality of relationship that would warm a delectable exchange of rosy intimations or tentative expressions of budding feelings of delight. It was teacher and pupil. She unsuspectingly insisted on following her rôle of preceptress and very earnest was she about it, too.
And he couldn't create any kind of warm connection that would allow for a delightful exchange of sweet hints or hesitant expressions of emerging feelings of joy. It was all just teacher and student. She unknowingly stuck to her role as a teacher and was quite serious about it, too.
She saw nothing comical in his frequent linguistic stumblings that would naturally lead to melting moods. As the Germans have, of course, little humor, she found in these faulty exhibitions only causes for disappointed glances and reprimands approaching severity. Often you would have thought he was a boy of ten reciting his lesson at her knee.
She saw nothing funny in his frequent language blunders that would typically lighten the mood. Since Germans usually lack humor, she found in these mistakes only reasons for disappointed looks and reprimands that were close to harsh. Often, it seemed like he was a ten-year-old boy reciting his lesson at her knee.
"Now Thursday by half past ten, you must have that line right or I will scold you." And she would sometimes laugh a little in her discouragement.
"Now it's Thursday at half past ten, you need to get that line right or I will scold you." And sometimes she'd laugh a bit in her frustration.
She looked upon it as a duty, a voluntary drudgery, but which, she assured him, she was most pleased to do. For she loved Heine[51]—raved about him, like sentimental German maids. She could never go over his verse often enough. And so she encouraged Gard to keep on. It was a reflected part of her normal disciplined life of acquisition.
She saw it as a responsibility, a kind of voluntary hard work, but she assured him that she was very happy to do it. She loved Heine[51]—talked about him like sentimental German girls do. She could read his poetry over and over again. So, she encouraged Gard to continue. It was a natural extension of her usual disciplined life of learning.
After a month of these tactics he realized he was making no headway toward—he did not acknowledge what. Young men as a type did not seem to Elsa of special interest any more than a hundred other objects on earth. And then the cold weather before long put an end to the little promenades of rime by the shore, and Gard had to try other lines of attack on this radiant and beflowered German fortress.
After a month of these strategies, he realized he wasn't making any progress toward—he wasn't sure what. Young men, in general, no longer seemed particularly interesting to Elsa, just like a hundred other things on earth. Then the cold weather soon put a stop to the small walks by the shore, and Gard had to find other ways to approach this bright and blossoming German fortress.
The park of fir trees lay quite beyond the meadow. It was a silent, evocative spot, unfrequented except for a peasant now and then trudging along under a bundle of wood or a weather-beaten basket of provisions. Kirtley had managed to stray that far once with Elsa, but learned that the mother was expected to accompany at such distances. It provoked his silent comment,
The fir tree park was far beyond the meadow. It was a quiet, striking place, rarely visited except for an occasional peasant trudging along with a load of firewood or a worn basket of supplies. Kirtley had managed to wander that far once with Elsa but realized that mothers were expected to accompany children at such distances. It made him think silently,
"As nearly as I can estimate, about a half a mile from home is all that is allowed a German miss unchaperoned."
"As far as I can tell, a German girl can go about half a mile from home unchaperoned."
[52]It was the same when he invited Fräulein to the opera or theater. The parent must attend. As she was equally occupied, it did not appear easy for him to arrange for the two. Besides, Frau Bucher killed everything under these confounding and confounded circumstances. She sat between him and her daughter and ruled the conversation. It was little better than taking her alone, so he abandoned also these enterprises.
[52]It was the same when he invited Fräulein to the opera or theater. The parent had to join. Since she was just as busy, it didn’t seem easy for him to make plans for both of them. Plus, Frau Bucher ruined everything in these confusing and chaotic situations. She sat between him and her daughter, dominating the conversation. It was hardly better than taking her alone, so he gave up on those plans as well.
In the talk at table the family, with Teuton tactlessness, now and then cried out the surpassing merits of the German young man. Unquestionably he led all others. Gard met no success in stemming the tide, miffed as he was about this social seclusion of the daughter. He soon saw his mistake in feeling personally hurt, as if insulted. It was but the custom. Could it be indeed a fact that German youths were such moral reprobates that girls could not be trusted to their unguarded companionship? The question had no meaning to his hosts. It was useless to hint of such an idea, burning as he often was to launch it upon the waves of discussion. To them, chaperoning signified the highest morals.
During conversations at the dinner table, the family, without a hint of subtlety, frequently praised the exceptional qualities of the German young man. Clearly, he stood out among the rest. Gard struggled to change the subject, feeling frustrated about the social isolation placed on the daughter. He quickly realized that it was a mistake to take it personally, as if he were being insulted. It was simply a tradition. Could it really be true that German boys were such moral failures that girls couldn't be left alone with them? This question held no significance for his hosts. It was pointless to even suggest such an idea, no matter how much he wanted to bring it up in discussion. To them, having a chaperone represented the highest moral standards.
They exploded with, "It may very well[53] be as you say in America! That is to be expected. Are there any morals in the United States? We have heard awful things. There are the Mormons. There is co-education. And young girls of the best families go around loose with men day and night. What could be the result? Free love. And free love means cheap love or no love at all. Admittedly pretty low conditions for virtue. What else can be looked for in a country where all sorts of people come promiscuously from everywhere? Divorces, voting females, slatterns, homelessness, neglected, poorly educated children."
They burst out with, "It might very well[53] be as you say in America! That’s to be expected. Are there any morals in the United States? We’ve heard terrible things. There are the Mormons. There’s co-education. And young girls from good families wander around freely with men day and night. What could be the outcome? Free love. And free love means cheap love or no love at all. Clearly, that’s a pretty low standard for virtue. What else can you expect in a country where all kinds of people come together from everywhere? Divorces, women voting, slobs, homelessness, neglected, poorly educated kids."
If, in passing, America and Americans were referred to in the family, and this was rare, Elsa, Gard noticed, kept silent. Yet she could be very wrought up about other Europeans. This nursed his fancies. He interpreted it in terms of promise. Elsa, he decided, was a good girl in a hedge-hog environment of unbelievable traits, of warring contrasts.
If America and Americans were mentioned in the family, which was rare, Elsa, Gard noticed, would stay quiet. However, she could really get worked up about other Europeans. This fueled his imagination. He saw it as a sign of promise. Gard concluded that Elsa was a good person in a prickly environment filled with unbelievable traits and conflicting contrasts.
CHAPTER VIII
German Dating
ONCE during the winter he tried on her a course of flirtation which he had learned very well in his Sophomore year. But German girls do not flirt. His arrows sank in feebly, impotently, as if her attention had the despairing resistance of a sandbag. Unperturbed she made nothing of it. He felt that she thought he was silly or had the rickets. So he speedily gave this up.
ONCE during the winter, he tried to flirt with her using techniques he had mastered in his sophomore year. But German girls don’t really flirt. His attempts fell flat, as if her attention was as unyielding as a sandbag. She remained unfazed by it all. He got the sense she thought he was being ridiculous or had some sort of issue. So he quickly dropped it.
Thus he became aware how vastly different are courtship and other relations between young men and young women in America and in Germany. He asked himself.
Thus he realized how vastly different courtship and other relationships between young men and young women are in America compared to Germany. He asked himself.
"Are the German ways more civilized?" Certainly, to the Teuton, they represent a more creditable and becoming evolution. He always stoutly favors his own customs, and finds little here to discuss. Even if a rotten morality in his young gods is to be assumed,[55] this would be proper as in the young gods of the mythologies.
"Are the German ways more civilized?" Certainly, to the German, they represent a more respectable and fitting evolution. He consistently champions his own customs and finds little here to debate. Even if a questionable morality in his young gods is to be assumed,[55] this would be appropriate just like in the young gods of mythologies.
The Teuton marriage refers plainly to property. The language has prominent terms indicating how espousal means goods with a woman attached to them. There is scarcely an equivalent in English. Courtship in the form of natural little raptures that disport in and beautify enamored companionship in youth, the pure, unfettered, mystic attraction between the sexes in blossoming time, are practically unknown to the German social life. The full gloss of fancy, the velveting of manners, the felicitous fabrication of innocent emotions into a blessed garment of many colors, find their development outside the domain of Thor. Such associations have there no charming playtime, but forthwith make for permanent good or permanent evil.
The Teuton marriage is essentially about property. The language clearly shows that getting married means taking on a woman along with her possessions. There’s really no exact equivalent in English. In Germany, the natural little joys of courtship that enhance and beautify young love—the pure, unrestricted, mysterious attraction between the sexes during their blossoming years—are practically nonexistent. The full range of romantic imagination, the smoothness of social interaction, and the innocent emotions woven into a beautiful tapestry are developed outside the influence of Thor. In that culture, such connections don’t involve playful interactions but lead straight to lasting good or lasting bad.
Accordingly, for Gard, in his fond inclinations, there was no experience with Cupids about the Bucher flower garden. Only, as it were, a sort of rough sledding on broken, jolting ice! And he noted the comparative absence of such delicate sentiment in German literature. Aside from Heine, who became French, German letters have relatively little[56] to offer on this score. The very language discourages love-making. Since Heine's exile a century ago, the increasing might of the armored Hohenzollerns had finally almost killed all this.
Accordingly, for Gard, in his fond inclinations, there was no experience with Cupid in the Bucher flower garden. Instead, it was more like a rough ride on broken, bumpy ice! He noticed the lack of such delicate sentiment in German literature. Aside from Heine, who adapted to French culture, German literature has relatively little[56] to offer on this topic. The very language discourages romance. Since Heine's exile a century ago, the growing power of the armored Hohenzollerns had nearly destroyed all of this.
Gard was thrown out of gear in another way. Fräulein's lack not only of amatory complaisance but of social polish or even facility kept him dubious and disconcerted. She brusquely alternated between a sisterly tenderness of familiarity, almost exaggerated, only to follow it by a sudden, disquieting flop over on the side of a formality as stiff as buckram. She would be as distant as if they were two boarders having a tiff in a pension. These detachments were not because of anything Kirtley had done or said. They formed a natural example of Gothic undevelopedness in human relations, the rude unevenness of beginners.
Gard was thrown off balance in another way. Fräulein's lack of romantic interest, along with her absence of social grace or even conversational ease, left him feeling unsure and unsettled. She would abruptly switch from an overly sisterly warmth to a sudden, uncomfortable formality as rigid as cardboard. At times, she seemed as distant as if they were two tenants having an argument in a pension. These shifts weren't due to anything Kirtley had said or done. They were a natural example of the awkwardness in human relationships, the rough inconsistencies of newcomers.
But, then, he forgave her for this.
But then, he forgave her for it.
"Is she not extremely occupied—full of pursuits? How admirable!"
"Is she not incredibly busy—engaged in so many activities? How impressive!"
It shamed him, spurred him on not a little. For days he would only see her at the generous meals where she exclaimed over her dread of getting fat. That usually furnishes a Ger[57]man with an excuse for being helped to more. She dutifully played of an evening in the family orchestra, yet this was a musical, not a social, happening. The severe if rich harmonies that were favored, largely with the idea of drill, created generally an atmosphere of austerity.
It embarrassed him, and it motivated him quite a bit. For days, he could only see her at the large meals where she talked about her fear of getting fat. This usually gives a German an excuse to have more food. She faithfully performed in the family orchestra in the evenings, but this was more about music than socializing. The serious, but rich, harmonies they preferred, mainly for practice, generally created a vibe of strictness.
She could not understand Gard's offers to carry her umbrella over her to a class or to bring her a storm coat in case of need. Such attentiveness meant intrusions almost to be resented. She appeared to frown upon any kindly little considerations that should have been agreeable to her or at any rate convenient. She had been brought up to do everything for herself. There was nothing of the clinging vine about her. Young German women are not expected to lean upon men in this wise.
She couldn't understand Gard's offers to carry her umbrella to class or to bring her a raincoat if needed. Such attentiveness felt intrusive and almost annoying. She seemed to frown upon any small acts of kindness that should have been appreciated or at least convenient. She had been raised to be self-sufficient. There was nothing needy about her. Young German women aren’t expected to rely on men like that.
Presents of candy or what-not are looked upon with an inquisitive or doubtful eye, especially by the parents. For the German girl has no charming secrets from her father and mother. They must know all, with immediate conjectures about marriage. Troubling gifts, consequently, became rather out of the question with Gard.
Presents of candy or other treats are viewed with curiosity or skepticism, especially by the parents. The German girl doesn’t keep any charming secrets from her father and mother. They need to know everything, often jumping to conclusions about marriage. As a result, troublesome gifts became pretty much out of the question with Gard.
[58]He feared that Fräulein Elsa might reflect sometimes the feeling of unfriendliness which he was aware of in the supercilious Rudi. The latter exhibited a negligent attitude of indifference toward Gard, though it was cloaked under casualness. There was a sinister air about the young engineer, and she would be bound to follow submissively anyone breathing the military ozone.
[58]He was worried that Fräulein Elsa might sometimes pick up on the unfriendly vibe he sensed from the arrogant Rudi. The latter showed an uncaring attitude toward Gard, even though it was disguised as nonchalance. There was something off about the young engineer, and she would likely follow anyone who exuded a military presence without question.
Under all these unsettling circumstances, Kirtley's uncertain attachment for the German language did not increase by Peter Schlemihl strides. Besides, his regular teacher was something like a wild boar. He had proceeded to dragoon Gard as if he were a lad. And Herr Keller's person was offensive. He exhaled a smell unpleasant if scholastic. Dressed in a soiled, shiny, black garb, and with a bristly mustache and beard which often showed egg of a morning, he talked blatantly of having been in Paris as a soldier in '70. It was his one excursion out of Saxony.
Under all these unsettling circumstances, Kirtley's shaky interest in the German language didn't get any better. On top of that, his regular teacher was like a wild boar. He had started to treat Gard like he was a kid. And Herr Keller was just unpleasant. He had an off-putting smell that was ironically academic. Wearing a dirty, shiny black outfit, and with a scruffy mustache and beard that often had egg in them in the morning, he bragged loudly about having been a soldier in Paris in '70. It was his only trip outside of Saxony.
Even the German language at such a cost was not very inviting. Finally Gard received a curt note to the effect that if he were not more assiduous, the lessons would better end.[59] Herr Keller did not want to be bothered with triflers.
Even the German language, at that price, wasn't very appealing. Eventually, Gard got a brief note saying that if he didn't put in more effort, the lessons would be better off ending.[59] Herr Keller didn't want to deal with slackers.
"Bounced from school!" Kirtley exclaimed. It was the first time. He took advantage of this opportunity to discontinue.
"Bounced from school!" Kirtley said, shocked. It was the first time. He used this chance to drop out.
He could see that his hosts did not blame the professor. Why, he was capable of forcibly drilling the Teuton language and literature into a post hole. This doubtless confirmed Kirtley's failure as a student in their eyes. And this was to be looked for in Americans who think that they can acquire knowledge and know life by gadding about and "observing," instead of by book study. The awful German language seemed doomed to blast Gard's affectionate hopes.
He noticed that his hosts didn’t blame the professor. After all, he was capable of forcefully pounding the German language and literature into a post hole. This likely reinforced Kirtley's reputation as a failing student in their eyes. And this was to be expected from Americans who believe they can gain knowledge and understand life by wandering around and "observing," instead of through studying books. The challenging German language seemed destined to shatter Gard's hopeful dreams.
While his burgeoning amorousness met with such blighting encouragement in the direction of Fräulein Elsa, it encountered unexpectedly an immense and yearning bosom in another quarter. Fräulein Wasserhaus, next door, clamored for a mate. With cowlike simpleness she almost bellowed out for love. Of an age verging on the precarious she waddled into and out from Villa Elsa with bulging breasts so bared, under the transparent pretenses of white gauze, that Frau Bucher de[60]clared herself shocked. She said that the Wasserhaus was trying to be a part of the disgraceful Naked Kultur that had been assailing Germany.
While his growing affection for Fräulein Elsa was met with discouragement, he unexpectedly found a huge, longing heart in another direction. Fräulein Wasserhaus, next door, was desperate for a partner. With a naïve eagerness, she almost called out for love. Approaching a precarious age, she waddled in and out of Villa Elsa with her bulging breasts nearly exposed, hidden only by sheer white gauze, which shocked Frau Bucher. She claimed that Wasserhaus was trying to be part of the disgraceful Naked Kultur that had been attacking Germany.
When this bovine soul came to know of Kirtley's presence, she fastened her consuming desires upon him. She had a brother in America and actively developed a hankering to go there and be near him. Yoking up with a Yankee would be a most natural and fitting state in which to negotiate the Atlantic.
When this cowgirl found out Kirtley was around, she focused all her desires on him. She had a brother in America and really wanted to go there to be close to him. Partnering up with a Yankee would be the perfect way to cross the Atlantic.
As the Bucher wall was too high for her to hang over in her languishing ardors, she hung over her gate to offer a book or a tiger lily to Gard as he passed. Several times when the pachydermatous Tekla banged her way upstairs with an armful of utensils in her work, a bouncing compote or other unabashed delicacy would be tumbling about on a dustpan or a slop basin, bound for the attic room by the linden tree. Twice a belabored missive accompanied these little couriers, anxiously quoting some anguishing sentimentality from one of the household poets writhing amid the pages of the affecting Gartenlaube.
As the Bucher wall was too high for her to lean over in her longing, she leaned over her gate to offer a book or a tiger lily to Gard as he passed by. Several times when the heavy Tekla stomped her way upstairs with an armful of utensils for her work, a bouncing compote or some other unapologetic treat would be spilling out on a dustpan or a slop basin, headed for the attic room by the linden tree. Twice, a worn-out message accompanied these little deliveries, nervously quoting some emotional sentiment from one of the household poets struggling amid the pages of the touching Gartenlaube.
It was at first so bothersome that Gard contemplated leaving the neighborhood. Even[61] the Buchers, truest of prosy Germans, could grasp the ridiculousness of this situation, and it was the one item of noisy fun they could fall back upon when they wished to be especially entertaining.
It was initially so annoying that Gard thought about moving out of the neighborhood. Even[61] the Buchers, the most straightforward of Germans, could see how ridiculous this situation was, and it became the one source of loud entertainment they relied on when they wanted to be particularly amusing.
"Mein Gott!" the Frau would cry out when going over her troubles and arduous occupations. "And I've got to get a husband for the Wasserhaus yet!" The Herr often went into a deafening rage about it.
"Goodness!" the woman would exclaim when going over her troubles and tough tasks. "And I still need to find a husband for the Wasserhaus!" The man often flew into a furious rage about it.
"Is there no way to keep that lachrymose female out of my house with her belated calf-love? She annoys the good Herr Kirtley." And he would toddle out, slamming the door like a clap of thunder.
"Is there no way to keep that tearful woman out of my house with her late-night infatuation? She really annoys good Mr. Kirtley." And he would stomp off, slamming the door like a thunderclap.
The family assumed a very self-conscious behavior when the lorn maiden was mentioned, and were anxious Gard should know that, while unfortunately she was their neighbor, she was not at all of their stratum.
The family acted very aware of themselves when the lonely girl was brought up, and they were eager for Gard to understand that, although she unfortunately lived nearby, she was not at all from their social class.
"Poor girl!" Gard mused. There were nearly half again as many women as men in Saxony.
"Poor girl!" Gard thought. There were almost 50% more women than men in Saxony.
At last he came to know there seemed to be a mystery about Fräulein Elsa—something which was hidden from him. And a new and deeper interest was summoned forth from[62] within his breast. Occasionally at table she was silent as a mile stone. Some days she did not appear to his sight at all. And then, when he did see her, she evidently wanted to avoid him. Very true it was that she often pored over the little volume of Heine in her room without a word to anyone. But, of a sudden, she would become frankly in evidence again—a floral and quite superb girl, resolutely "making good," as was her wont.
At last, he realized there was something mysterious about Fräulein Elsa—something he couldn’t quite grasp. A new and deeper interest stirred within him. Sometimes at the table, she was as quiet as a mile marker. On some days, she didn’t appear at all. And when he did see her, she clearly tried to avoid him. It was true that she often immersed herself in a little volume of Heine in her room without saying a word to anyone. But suddenly, she'd reappear, a vibrant and stunning girl, determined to shine as she always did.
"What is it?" Gard wondered.
"What's going on?" Gard wondered.
None of the family ever referred to it. Even in his intimate talks with her mother, whom Gard now and then practiced his German upon as she was plying her needle, nothing was divulged. There was no young German coming to the house with regularity. Consequently, could it be love difficulties? Yet something was wrong. It lent respect to Elsa, threw enhancement about her.
None of the family ever mentioned it. Even during his close conversations with her mother, whom Gard occasionally practiced his German on while she was sewing, nothing was revealed. There was no young German visiting the house regularly. So, could it be issues of love? Yet something was off. It gave Elsa a sense of respect, adding to her presence.
Gard concluded that the roughness of the Bucher family life mortified her. It was often well-nigh outlandish. How could she have so ardently studied the beautiful in music and colors without realizing this?
Gard concluded that the harshness of the Bucher family's life embarrassed her. It was often almost bizarre. How could she have so passionately studied beauty in music and colors without noticing this?
But he had not been long enough in Germany to be advised that knowledge is not[63] expected there to enter into the inner life. What one is has little in common with what one knows or can dexterously do. Study does not pass into character. The German, with all his acquirements, does not look for moral or esthetic effect upon the heart or soul.
But he hadn’t been in Germany long enough to realize that knowledge isn’t expected to lead to a deeper understanding of life. Who you are has little in common with what you know or can skillfully do. Learning doesn’t shape character. The German, despite all his knowledge, doesn’t seek a moral or aesthetic impact on the heart or soul.
German women esteem the strong fighter, the rugged accomplisher the boisterous enthusiast, among their men. Whether these are atheistic, immoral, boorish, cruel, are considerations of secondary importance. The daughters marry them with little hesitation. Men are men, supreme, to be adored. Women are to be tolerated, stepped on, sat upon. Man is the master, woman is the willing servant.
German women admire strong fighters, tough achievers, and loud enthusiasts among their men. Whether these men are atheistic, immoral, rude, or cruel are secondary considerations. The daughters marry them without much hesitation. Men are men, supreme and worthy of adoration. Women are to be tolerated, stepped on, and sat upon. Man is the master, while woman is the willing servant.
CHAPTER IX
A Reporter
GARD'S experience in perfecting himself in German met with another rebuff. Under the prompting of his parental friends in Villa Elsa he concluded at length to attend a course of lectures given by a celebrated professor who was, however, known to be of an exceptionally cantankerous disposition. Kirtley had become aware of the querulous restrictions and exactions attending the most peaceful German activities and made sure of his ground at the class room, whither he went one morning with encouraging expectations. He asked the janitor if the hearings were free and public. They were.
GARD'S efforts to improve himself in German faced another setback. Encouraged by his parents' friends at Villa Elsa, he finally decided to attend a series of lectures by a well-known professor, who was, however, infamous for his difficult personality. Kirtley had come to recognize the annoying rules and demands that accompanied even the most straightforward German activities, so he wanted to be prepared when he arrived at the classroom. One morning, he approached the janitor to ask if the lectures were free and open to the public. They were.
It was the usual amphitheater and Gard entered to find only a few regular students down in the front rows. He decided on a seat alone in the center. Herr Professor, be[65]-spectacled, soon clambered up on the rostrum and squatted dumpily. Blear-eyed he scanned the place and blurted out:
It was the usual amphitheater, and Gard walked in to find just a few regular students in the front rows. He chose a seat in the center by himself. Herr Professor, be[65]-spectacled, soon climbed up on the podium and sat down awkwardly. Squinting, he looked around and blurted out:
"There is a stranger in the room. The lecture will not proceed until he departs." Gard, having been assured by the janitor, could not imagine that he himself was meant. The man of prodigious learning shouted angrily, throwing out his arm toward Kirtley:
"There’s someone unfamiliar in the room. The lecture won’t continue until he leaves." Gard, having been told by the janitor, couldn’t believe it was him they were talking about. The highly knowledgeable man shouted angrily, pointing at Kirtley:
"Must I repeat that there is a foreigner in the audience? I shall not begin until his presence has been removed."
"Do I need to say again that there’s a stranger in the audience? I won’t start until he’s gone."
Gard went away, incensed. Surely, he swore to himself, Teuton erudition acts so often like a mad bear ready to claw away at men and things. He never attended another day lecture.
Gard stormed off, furious. He convinced himself that German scholarship often behaves like a mad bear, ready to tear into people and everything around it. He never went to another day lecture.
But he had to get on with his German. He decided to put an advertisement for an instructor in the Dresden Nachrichten. At its bureau he ran counter to a lot of ifs and ands at the hands of a surly young clerk. A German, naturally gruff, only needs a small position to increase his acerbity. His newspapers display, likewise, a disagreeable officiousness, being nearly always, to some extent, bureaucratic organs. They are lords, not servants,[66] of the public. They do not appear to want your business, your money.
But he had to get on with his German. He decided to place an ad for a tutor in the Dresden Nachrichten. At its bureau, he faced a lot of hesitations and complications from a grumpy young clerk. A German, typically blunt, only needs a small role to boost his irritation. Their newspapers also show an unpleasant officiousness, often acting as bureaucratic entities. They are masters, not servants,[66] of the public. They don't seem interested in your business or your money.
Gard's imperfect German balked him, too. After he had been back and forth to the little window three or four times, trying to alter his "ad" to suit the rasping individual whose face Gard could scarcely catch a glimpse of by stooping down to the aperture, an American stepped forward. He was a steel gray man of about sixty and was inserting a notice. He said he was familiar with all the rigors of such a proceeding, being a correspondent for the Chicago Gazette.
Gard's clumsy German held him back, too. After he had gone to the small window three or four times, trying to adjust his "ad" to please the gruff person whose face Gard could barely see by leaning down to the opening, an American stepped up. He was a steel-gray man of about sixty and was putting in a notice. He mentioned that he was well-acquainted with the challenges of this kind of process, as he was a correspondent for the Chicago Gazette.
"Perhaps I can help," volunteered Miles Anderson. "After having had scraps and fights about this sort of thing around this country for seven years—though the Germans won't fight—I've finally got the hang of it. You can save three or four words by a different jargon. I can see you are an American because you take up more room about this than necessary. German economy, you must remember."
"Maybe I can help," Miles Anderson offered. "After dealing with arguments and conflicts about this for seven years in this country—though the Germans aren't really ones to fight—I finally get it. You can cut down on three or four words by using a different lingo. I can tell you’re American because you’re making a bigger deal out of this than you need to. Keep in mind German efficiency."
Gard was glad to find a friend of his race. And after the advertisement was disposed of, they repaired to a neighboring beer hall to refresh and relieve their feelings. Anderson[67] was smooth-shaven, with piercing gray eyes under bushy eyebrows, his head presenting the appearance of just having been in a barber's chair. With the insistent curiosity of a practiced interviewer he wanted to know why Kirtley had come to this godless land; where he was hanging out; and all about the Buchers.
Gard was happy to find a friend from his own background. After they wrapped up the advertisement, they headed to a nearby bar to unwind and share their thoughts. Anderson[67] was clean-shaven, with sharp gray eyes beneath thick eyebrows, and his head looked like he had just stepped out of a barber's chair. With the relentless curiosity of a seasoned interviewer, he wanted to know why Kirtley had come to this godforsaken place, where he was staying, and everything about the Buchers.
A bachelor, Anderson had become toughened by hotel and pension. He thought Kirtley very fortunate in getting right into a family where the veritable German bloom had not been rubbed off by foreigners, by boarders. It would be a most fragrant experience. Here Kirtley would see on the native heath the genuine German of the great middle class that makes up the might of the nation.
A bachelor, Anderson had become hardened by working in hotels and pensions. He thought Kirtley was very lucky to be entering a family where the true German character hadn’t been dulled by foreigners or boarders. It would be a really refreshing experience. Here, Kirtley would witness the authentic German spirit of the great middle class that forms the backbone of the nation.
"Can you read German comfortably?" asked Anderson. "What do you make of it? I've been studying it for seven years and sometimes it seems as if I hadn't got much further than the verb to hate."
"Can you read German easily?" Anderson asked. "What do you think of it? I've been studying it for seven years, and sometimes it feels like I haven't gotten much beyond the verb 'to hate.'"
"You can't give me any short cuts about it, then?" laughed Gard.
"You can't give me any shortcuts about it, then?" laughed Gard.
"Yes, I can—yes, I can. Here's a little compilation and analysis of the irregular verbs," explained his new acquaintance, pull[68]ing a green brochure from his pocket. "Only costs a mark. You can get a second-hand one at the book stalls by the Augustus bridge. I always carry it with me and con it over and over. Good for the pronunciation. If you get the irregular verbs of a language well fed into your system, you've got the language by the windpipe.
"Yes, I can—yes, I can. Here’s a little collection and breakdown of the irregular verbs," his new friend said, pulling a green brochure from his pocket. "It only costs a mark. You can find a used one at the book stalls by the Augustus bridge. I always keep it with me and study it repeatedly. It’s great for pronunciation. If you really get the irregular verbs of a language well ingrained in your mind, you’ve got the language under control."
"Then buy Simplicissimus. You'll pick up a good deal from that—the popular expressions, the phrases and exclamations that are going. If you learn to use the exclamations, it makes you interesting and well-liked. It gives the other fellow the chance to do the talking. Simplicissimus and that kind of thing are better than the dry, stilted German classics—'Ekkehard,' 'Nathan der Weise' and all that discarded stuff. But remember that esprit was not given the Germans, because it would hide their Boeotian stupidity."
"Then buy Simplicissimus. You'll get a lot out of it—the popular expressions, the phrases and exclamations that are in style. If you learn to use these exclamations, it makes you interesting and well-liked. It gives the other person a chance to do the talking. Simplicissimus and similar works are much better than the dry, stiff German classics—'Ekkehard,' 'Nathan der Weise,' and all that outdated stuff. But remember that esprit wasn't given to the Germans, because it would overshadow their dull stupidity."
"I haven't yet seen—I suppose I shall see"—said Kirtley, "why the general American student like me is so persistently encouraged to come to Germany. Why is it?"
"I haven't seen—I guess I will see"—said Kirtley, "why the average American student like me is so consistently encouraged to come to Germany. Why is that?"
"Because we are damn fools," heartily rejoined Anderson. "The Germans don't have education. They have instruction. The one[69] makes gentlemen. The other makes experts. It is hard for an expert to be a gentleman. They don't have gentlemen in Germany. No such word in their language. It is a nation of experts, but that's precisely the reason it should be feared. Why, education would teach a German not to slobber at his meals.
"Because we are absolute fools," Anderson replied enthusiastically. "The Germans don't have education. They have instruction. The former[69] creates gentlemen. The latter creates experts. It's tough for an expert to be a gentleman. They don't have gentlemen in Germany. There's no such word in their language. It's a nation of experts, but that's exactly why it should be feared. Honestly, education would teach a German not to drool at his meals."
"It is his strenuous ingrowing instruction that cultivates his extreme national egotism until it has become like a boil. His racial egoism helps obscure the obscure sunlight here in Germany and blinds him. He has to wear spectacles. It is a natural cry, his cry for a place in the sun."
"It’s his intense self-centered education that fuels his extreme national pride until it feels like a sore. His racial pride helps dim the already limited sunlight here in Germany and blinds him. He has to wear glasses. It’s a natural shout, his plea for recognition and a spot in the spotlight."
"Should I have gone to England or France?" suggested Gard.
"Should I have gone to England or France?" Gard suggested.
"Yes. At any rate, not here. The German procedure roughens the fiber and lowers the moral standards of the general student. Instruction here is along mental and manual lines. The Teuton is meant to be a specialist. He is competent but not refined."
"Yes. Anyway, not here. The German method roughens the fiber and lowers the moral standards of the general student. Teaching here focuses on both mental and practical skills. The German is intended to be a specialist. He is capable but not polished."
The two compatriots gossiped along about this and that.
The two friends chatted casually about this and that.
"I'm having a devil of a time sleeping on my bed," confessed Gard. "You ought to[70] know about German beds. How do you get on with them?"
"I'm having a really hard time sleeping on my bed," Gard admitted. "You should know about German beds. How do you find them?"
"The German bed helps to give the German his bad disposition. I put two beds side by side and sleep across the middle. That's one way to fool the German bed. If I saw yours I might be able to suggest something."
"The German bed contributes to the German's bad mood. I place two beds next to each other and sleep diagonally across the middle. That’s one way to trick the German bed. If I saw yours, I might be able to offer some suggestions."
Anderson frankly expressed a desire to visit the Loschwitz home. So on Gard's invitation they had lunch and went out to his suburb.
Anderson openly said he wanted to visit the Loschwitz home. So, on Gard's invitation, they had lunch and went out to his neighborhood.
CHAPTER X
Espionage and Conflict
THEY took off the bed clothes, including the two huge feather bolsters in the center.
THEY removed the bedding, including the two large feather pillows in the middle.
"These bolsters are for the gingerbread effect that the German likes everywhere," explained the visitor. They examined the remaining construction. It was narrow and short. It suggested a granite-like base.
"These supports are for the gingerbread effect that Germans like everywhere," the visitor explained. They looked over the rest of the construction. It was narrow and short. It hinted at a granite-like base.
"Rock of Ages!" commented Anderson. "As you can't ask for an additional bed, all I can see is for you to swill beer and then you don't care where you sleep. That's the way the Germans do."
"Rock of Ages!" Anderson said. "Since you can't ask for another bed, all I can suggest is that you drink beer and then you won't care where you sleep. That's how the Germans do it."
The journalist appeared disappointed in not meeting any of the family that first day. Frau was overwhelmed in kitchen duties and not presentable. The other members were away, working, working. Anderson had to be contented with Gard's description of them, after the latter had passed the cigars.
The journalist seemed disappointed that he didn’t meet any of the family on the first day. Frau was busy with kitchen duties and wasn't presentable. The other family members were away, working and more working. Anderson had to settle for Gard's description of them after Gard passed the cigars.
[72]"Who's the spy in your family?" abruptly asked the elder.
[72]"Who’s the spy in your family?" the older person asked suddenly.
"The spy?"
"The agent?"
"Yes, the spy. Every well-regulated German family should have a spy in it."
"Yes, the spy. Every well-organized German family should have a spy in it."
"What for?" queried Kirtley in surprise.
"What for?" Kirtley asked in surprise.
"Why, for the Kaiser, of course. Who else? The Teutons call him euphemistically the Government. But without Wilhelm there wouldn't be any German Government."
"Well, for the Kaiser, of course. Who else? The Germans refer to him politely as the Government. But without Wilhelm, there wouldn't be any German Government."
"Why should he want spies in his own German families?" interrogated Gard innocently.
"Why would he want spies in his own German families?" Gard asked innocently.
"Didn't every medieval feudal lord keep close tab on his subjects—the people he owned? The Kaiser wants to know of any signs of disloyalty. If a household harbors any foreigners, as your family is doing, he wants to know what they are up to."
"Didn’t every medieval feudal lord keep a close eye on his subjects—the people he controlled? The Kaiser wants to be aware of any signs of disloyalty. If a household is harboring any foreigners, like your family is, he wants to know what they’re up to."
"Do you mean to say that the Government knows about me—that I'm being watched?"
"Are you saying that the Government knows about me and that I'm being monitored?"
"They are at least ready to watch you. Mind you, Germany is a real block-house, and the elaborate spy system is an integral part of it. I should say, from what you tell me of the Buchers, that young Rudolph is the sleuth here."
"They're at least prepared to keep an eye on you. Just so you know, Germany is like a fortress, and the detailed spy network is a crucial part of it. From what you've told me about the Buchers, I'd say that young Rudolph is the one playing detective here."
"Rudolph?"
"Rudolph?"
[73]"Yes. He's doubtless keeping an eye on you and reporting to the authorities if there's anything suspicious about you and your actions."
[73]"Yes. He's probably watching you and telling the authorities if he notices anything odd about you or what you do."
And then the journalist, pleased to have a fresh listener, launched upon his pet idea.
And then the journalist, happy to have a new audience, started discussing his favorite idea.
"The Kaiser is preparing an abysmal pitfall for the world and it won't take heed. I tell you, Kirtley—and I want you to mark my words—Deutschland is going to spring at Europe like a tiger. The army and navy are ready for the onslaught. When they spring, it will be farewell to civilization—except the German—unless something like a miracle supervenes. The French army is being moth-eaten by the Socialists, the British navy has dry rot. I look to see Wilhelm practically the ruler of the earth. If not, he will cause it to pay a cost that will make the next fifty years groggy."
"The Kaiser is setting a terrible trap for the world, and no one is paying attention. I'm telling you, Kirtley—and I want you to really listen—Germany is going to pounce on Europe like a tiger. The army and navy are ready for the attack. When they do, it will be goodbye to civilization—except for the Germans—unless something miraculous happens. The French army is being worn down by the Socialists, and the British navy is falling apart. I expect Wilhelm to become practically the ruler of the world. If not, he'll make everyone pay a price that will leave the next fifty years in a daze."
Kirtley thought this was jesting. He later learned that the "old man" was regarded as "cracked" on this topic. Every spring he prophesied war, but it had not come. The Kaiser failed to rush to Paris and there dictate terms to an astounded and cowed universe. People politely laughed in their sleeves. Yes,[74] Anderson was a fine fellow, but they wearied of his dismal forebodings that came to naught. Some said it was because German had been hard for him to learn. He had taken it up when more than fifty and had become tangled in its snarling roots—its beer-drunken syntax. "He had got mad at the language." It was natural that he should get mad at the people.
Kirtley thought this was just a joke. He later found out that the "old man" was considered "crazy" about this subject. Every spring he predicted war, but it never happened. The Kaiser didn't rush to Paris to impose terms on a shocked and intimidated world. People politely laughed behind his back. Sure, [74] Anderson was a decent guy, but they grew tired of his gloomy predictions that never came true. Some said it was because German was hard for him to learn. He started studying it when he was over fifty and got tangled up in its complicated structure—its confusing grammar. "He had got mad at the language." It made sense that he would be angry with the people, too.
Gard saw a light.
Gard saw a light.
"Perhaps," he said, "that's what the Buchers really mean about the German army conquering everybody whenever it wants to."
"Maybe," he said, "that's what the Buchers really mean when they talk about the German army being able to conquer anyone whenever it chooses."
"That's it, that's it!" Anderson was gratified by the confirmation. He went on with grave seriousness.
"That's it, that's it!" Anderson felt pleased by the confirmation. He continued with a serious demeanor.
"I'm a journalist. I have opportunities to see behind the curtain, haven't I? I have been at the army maneuvers, at the officers' messes and dinners, when they were sober and when they were drunk. Beer loosened their tongues and they did not care. They talk of it, boast of it, and the civilian, too. I'm telling no secrets. They are very frank about it. Don't you hear the Buchers openly discussing it? They all give us warning and we say it's a fine day. Did you ever read any of the Kaiser's speeches in German? There you find it all.[75] But he's crazy, they say. Crazy or not, he has the most thoroughly organized and powerful nation behind him that the globe ever saw. And behind him to a man."
"I'm a journalist. I have the chance to see behind the scenes, right? I've attended army drills and joined the officers for meals, both when they were sober and when they'd had a few too many. Beer made them talkative and they didn’t hold back. They brag about it, and so do the civilians. I'm not revealing any secrets. They’re pretty open about it. Don’t you hear the Buchers discussing it openly? They all warn us and we just say it’s a nice day. Have you ever read any of the Kaiser’s speeches in German? That’s where you find everything. But they say he’s insane. Insane or not, he leads the most organized and powerful nation the world has ever seen, and everyone’s behind him."
"Why don't you write it up, then—tell people over home?" Gard ventured, somewhat impressed.
"Why don't you write it up, then—tell people at home?" Gard suggested, a bit impressed.
"Write it up? Tell people? That's what I have been doing for five years. But what's the use of shouting to a world of fools? No one will pay any attention to it. My paper sends my stuff back and says it don't want war talk—it wants peace talk. Americans are happy and they don't want to be disturbed. They only want to hear about what they want to believe. So it seems to be everywhere."
"Write it up? Share it with people? That's exactly what I have been doing for five years. But what's the point of yelling into a crowd of idiots? No one will listen. My paper returns my articles and says it doesn't want discussions about war—it wants conversations about peace. Americans are content, and they don't want to be bothered. They only want to hear what they want to believe. It feels like that's the situation everywhere."
"I guess you are right about that," Gard testified. "I have been a pretty fair reader of our papers and periodicals and have never been made to feel there was any need for alarm."
"I guess you're right about that," Gard said. "I've read our papers and magazines pretty regularly and have never felt there was any reason to be worried."
"Exactly," Anderson scolded. "Why, look at our Exchange professors. They are coming over here, ready to swallow the Germans whole. The Kaiser invites them to lunch on his yacht, gives them a pat on the shoulder blade, and they are his. While the Germans[76] plainly despise us, our educators go home crying Great is Germany! How superior are her people! Let us send our sons over there to drink of her wisdom and grandeur! What inanity! Bah!"
"Exactly," Anderson scolded. "Just look at our Exchange professors. They come here, eager to be completely taken in by the Germans. The Kaiser invites them to lunch on his yacht, gives them a friendly pat on the back, and they are sold. Meanwhile, the Germans[76] obviously look down on us, and our educators go home saying how great Germany is! How superior her people are! Let's send our sons over there to soak up their wisdom and greatness! What nonsense! Ugh!"
"And so here I am," Gard smiled. "But I have bunted into you almost the first thing."
"And here I am," Gard smiled. "But I ran into you almost right away."
"Couldn't do better—couldn't do better," repeated Anderson with a cheering turn. "I'll tell you what to do. I'll give you a little practical advice—free."
"Couldn't do better—couldn't do better," Anderson said encouragingly. "Here's what you should do. I'll give you some practical advice—no charge."
"It won't be worth much if it's free, will it?"
"It won't be worth much if it's free, right?"
"Well, it's worth this rotten German cigar you've given me. Read the editorials and correspondence in the Dresden papers. They're a good sample. There you'll see what the German attitude toward us is officially, and what German hatred feeds on day by day. The trouble with Americans over here is they don't read anything serious. Of course our students study their text books. But generally our people just fly around, hear music, drink beer in the cafés, but they don't read. Too nervous—afraid of being bored. So they don't learn much."
"Well, it's worth this terrible German cigar you've given me. Check out the editorials and letters in the Dresden papers. They're a perfect example. That's where you'll see the official German attitude toward us and what's fueling German resentment day by day. The problem with Americans over here is that they don't read anything substantial. Sure, our students study their textbooks. But for the most part, our people just buzz around, listen to music, drink beer in the cafés, but they don't read. They're too anxious—worried about getting bored. So they don't really learn much."
Anderson ran on into other subjects.
Anderson moved on to other topics.
[77]"One great thing about the German system is that it would make such people work to some purpose. We don't. It also makes its plodders work. This Government recognizes frankly that most of its population, like all populations, are plodders, and it gives them something regularly to do and sees that they do it. This converts this dull element into an organized strength—a source of power. The Germans practice their wonderful economies with respect to the poorest kind of human energy. They kick something into their drones. So they are such a mighty nation in a small land.
[77]"One great thing about the German system is that it makes people work meaningfully. We don't do that. It also keeps its hard workers productive. This government openly recognizes that most of its population, like any population, consists of hard workers, and it provides them with regular tasks and ensures they complete them. This turns this mundane factor into an organized strength—a source of power. The Germans effectively harness their impressive resources when it comes to even the most limited human effort. They motivate their less active citizens. That's how they become such a powerful nation in a small territory."
"In America, in other countries, this element is rather a disorganized weakness. It is not pushed. It is for the most part waste material or neglected material. Our public system, when economies are concerned, first considers money, property. It seems sometimes as if our free individualistic plan of government were, after all, adapted for the minority of the bright-witted."
"In America and other countries, this aspect is often a chaotic weakness. It's not prioritized. Most of it is either waste or overlooked. When it comes to economic matters, our public system primarily focuses on money and property. It sometimes feels like our free, individualistic approach to government is really suited only for a minority of the sharp-minded."
CHAPTER XI
German Traditions
HAD the Buchers ever known an American before you came?" Anderson interrupted himself.
HAD the Buchers ever met an American before you came?" Anderson interrupted himself.
"No."
"Nope."
"How do you think they like you?"
"How do you think they feel about you?"
"I guess if I dropped out of their lives, I would not create much of a splash."
"I guess if I stepped out of their lives, it wouldn't make much of a difference."
"You'll find they hate you. Hate is the German religion. The Germans can hate people they've never known, never seen. They hate on principle and without principle. Of course it's the proper precursor for their programme of conquering the world. If they were trying to love the world, they could not be preparing to demolish it and expecting to."
"You'll see that they hate you. Hate is the German way. Germans can hate people they've never met or seen. They hate on principle and for no reason at all. Naturally, this is the right mindset for their plan to conquer the world. If they were trying to love the world, they wouldn't be getting ready to destroy it and expecting to."
Though Anderson had lived so long among the Teutons, he had not become Teutonized. He was a marked exception. He viewed the[79] nation with a metallic aplomb that at times sent shivers down Kirtley's spine.
Though Anderson had lived among the Teutons for so long, he had not become one of them. He was a notable exception. He viewed the[79] nation with a confidence that sometimes sent shivers down Kirtley's spine.
"Now this family of yours," he went on discursively—"don't you notice about them and in them and behind them something tremendously unifying and propelling that is lacking in our American home?"
"Now this family of yours," he continued, "don’t you see something really unifying and driving about them and in them and behind them that’s missing in our American home?"
"I certainly do," responded Gard. "I can't make it out—their dynamic, conscientious industry. What is it for? It's not with the idea of making money—like Americans, eager to accumulate the dollars. It's not for personal fame. It's not for any ambitious social position. It does not seem to be for any of the reasons that inspire an American household. And yet it is here, in this house, in every room, behind every chair at table, night and morning. It's bigger than anything we find in our Yankee life because it's beyond and higher than mere individuality. It makes the Buchers satisfied and still is something that has fearfulness lurking about it. It's not religious or divine—they are not actuated by such motives, do not speak of them. What in the world is it that the Germans have that is so wonderful and we do not seem to have?"
"I really do," Gard replied. "I can't figure it out—their energetic, dedicated work ethic. What’s it all for? It’s not to make money—like Americans, who are keen on racking up dollars. It’s not for personal glory. It’s not for any lofty social status. It doesn’t seem to stem from any of the motivations that drive an American household. And yet it’s present here, in this home, in every room, behind every chair at the table, morning and night. It’s bigger than anything we have in our American lives because it transcends and surpasses mere individuality. It brings satisfaction to the Buchers, yet there’s something unsettling about it. It’s not religious or divine—they’re not driven by such reasons and don’t talk about them. What on earth do the Germans have that is so incredible, and we don’t seem to possess?"
[80]Kirtley had thought a great deal about this and talked almost fluently.
[80]Kirtley had thought a lot about this and talked almost effortlessly.
"I'll tell you," and the old correspondent, bent forward toward him earnestly, glad that he had a young, receptive mind opened out toward him. "I'll tell you. It's simply the Hohenzollern in his mad and unconcealed pride about ruling the universe. He is in every German home like this, driving each individual to work the best, to make the most of himself and of herself, and without loss of time. He makes them understand that it's for the great German race—that they may become the potent force everywhere—leaders of mankind as he has taught them they deserve to be. It is for the benefit of their more and more deserving nation. But it is first and foremost for himself and his family. He has a burning, itching desire to reign everywhere. He is not a normal man physically and is unbalanced by a monumental vanity—arrogance—egotism.
"I'll tell you," the old correspondent leaned in closer, eager and pleased to have a young, open mind listening to him. "I'll tell you. It’s just the Hohenzollern with his crazy, open pride about controlling the world. He’s present in every German home, pushing everyone to work harder, to make the most of themselves without wasting any time. He makes them see it’s for the great German race—that they can become a powerful force everywhere—leaders of the world as he has taught them they deserve to be. It’s for the good of their increasingly worthy nation. But ultimately, it’s for himself and his family. He has a strong, burning desire to rule everywhere. He’s not a typical person physically and is thrown off balance by huge vanity—arrogance—egotism."
"When your Frau is so busily sewing, she is sewing for her household, it is true, but she is consciously and unconsciously sewing for Wilhelm. When your Fräulein goes out to her etching lesson, she is aware of being of[81] the magnificent German people, and shares a part of the national ambition to excel. It's this that we haven't got in America and can't well have under our system. But it's this unified, disciplined zeal that enables two or three ordinary Germans to do what it takes four ordinary Yankees to do. Clad in armor and with a glistening sword in hand, Germania ought to scare men, and they are not taking the warning.
"When your wife is so busy sewing, she’s sewing for her household, that’s true, but she’s consciously and unconsciously sewing for Wilhelm. When your young lady goes out to her etching lesson, she’s aware of being part of the magnificent German people and shares in the national ambition to excel. That’s what we don’t have in America and can’t easily achieve under our system. But it’s this unified, disciplined eagerness that allows two or three average Germans to accomplish what it takes four average Americans to do. Clad in armor and with a shining sword in hand, Germania should instill fear in men, yet they are ignoring the warning."
"But, Kirtley, it scares me. I feel—see—something awful coming. In the universal German hate, the national boundary stops any flow outward of sympathy, good faith, equity. All peoples outside are human insects whom it is proper for the Teuton to tread on if he can, crush the life out of, because they are in his pathway to glory."
"But, Kirtley, I'm really scared. I feel—see—something terrible approaching. In the widespread German hatred, the national boundary prevents any flow of sympathy, good faith, or fairness. All people outside are seen as human insects that the German can trample on if he wants, crush to death, because they’re in his way to glory."
Kirtley, who had stared at his new friend in this solemnity, turned a serious face toward the clawlike branches of his linden in its gauntness of late autumn-tide. This meaning of the animus that was impelling his odd and yet so normal German household, he began to see, was substantiated by a score of acts and attitudes in its daily life. He scarcely deemed it proper to tell of them.
Kirtley, who had been looking at his new friend with seriousness, turned his serious expression toward the claw-like branches of his linden tree in the bleakness of late autumn. He began to realize that the underlying motivation driving his strangely normal German household was reflected in a number of actions and attitudes in their everyday life. He hardly thought it was right to share them.
[82]Besides, he did not want to fire up Anderson who already was so unsettled, so comfortless, on the subject. But Kirtley was reasoning out how this animus gave a solidity, a solidarity, to the German household—a satisfied contentment—because it was working toward a definite racial goal. Any such incentive was almost absent in the American family.
[82]Besides, he didn't want to upset Anderson, who was already feeling so uneasy and uncomfortable about the topic. But Kirtley was thinking about how this hostility provided a sense of strength and unity to the German household— a sense of satisfied contentment—because it was striving towards a clear racial goal. Such motivation was almost nonexistent in the American family.
"And so," wound up Anderson with epigrams, "the years will be left humanity to weep these days of insouciance and neglect. You can see that Germany is a man-made nation. It is not the kind God or Nature would make. God must have turned His face when the Teuton species was manufactured. Germany is like a man-made hot air register. When it isn't throwing up hot air, it is throwing up cold air. It is always throwing up."
"And so," concluded Anderson with sharp remarks, "the years will leave humanity to mourn these days of carelessness and neglect. You can see that Germany is a constructed nation. It's not the kind that God or Nature would create. God must have looked away when the Teutonic people were formed. Germany is like a man-made heating system. When it's not blowing out hot air, it's blowing out cold air. It's always blowing out."
To change the somewhat painful theme, Kirtley soon began:
To shift the somewhat uncomfortable topic, Kirtley soon started:
"I don't see any sports—such as we know them—in Germany. How do they get along without them?" Like all Yankee college men he was alert on these lines.
"I don't see any sports—like we have them—here in Germany. How do they manage without them?" Like all American college guys, he was quick to pick up on this.
"No sports in Deutschland. Go out on the Dresden golf links of a morning and you'll find hardly a German soul playing. It's the[83] same in Vienna—the same in Berlin. They have links because it's the fashion in England. The Germans ape everything. Go out on the highway to Berlin or Vienna or any of the great roads and you will seldom meet any Germans touring in their motors for pleasure. Only Americans—English. The Germans are spoiling little time by such matters. They are busy—busy working for their Empire—busy like moles boring away to undermine the earth—busy drilling with arms.
"No sports in Germany. If you go to the golf courses in Dresden in the morning, you’ll hardly find any Germans playing. It’s the same in Vienna and Berlin. They have golf courses because it’s trendy in England. The Germans copy everything. If you drive on the highways to Berlin or Vienna or any major road, you will rarely see Germans traveling for leisure in their cars. Only Americans or British. The Germans don’t waste time on such things. They’re busy—busy building their Empire—busy like moles digging away underground—busy training with weapons."
"So you see no sporting terms incorporated in their daily language, in their newspaper language, such as we see in England and America—terms denoting fair play, square deal, manly courtesy toward the under dog. Our Anglo-Saxon motto, 'Don't hit him when he's down,' is no motto with the Germans. They think that's just the time to hit him. Kick him when he's flattened out. Kick him preferably in the face. That's one reason so many Teutons have scarred faces. The Anglo-Saxon spirit in a sporting crowd is for the little fellow. In Germany, it's for the big fellow—the fellow who already has everything on his side.
"So you don't see any sports terms used in their everyday language, or in their newspapers, like we do in England and America—terms that indicate fair play, a fair deal, and respectful treatment of the underdog. Our Anglo-Saxon motto, 'Don't hit him when he's down,' isn't a motto for the Germans. They think that's exactly the right time to hit him. Kick him when he's flat out. Preferably in the face. That’s one reason so many Germans have scarred faces. The Anglo-Saxon spirit in a sports crowd supports the underdog. In Germany, it supports the big guy—the one who already has everything in his favor."
"This sort of thing, of course, kills the true[84] idea and fun of sport. Take away its knightliness of bearing, spirit of self-sacrifice, exhibition of pluck though defeat is certain, and what have you left to sport about? It merely becomes a question of brute force—overwhelming force. You have cruelty left as a net result. And that's a large part of German conduct—cruelty to underlings or to those who are feebler or caught at an unfair disadvantage. Having no leaven of sports is one thing that makes the German life seem so heavy, ominous, brutal, to us."
"This kind of thing, of course, ruins the true[84] idea and enjoyment of sports. If you take away its nobility, spirit of selflessness, and courage to show up even when defeat is certain, what is left to enjoy about sports? It just becomes a battle of raw strength—sheer power. All that’s left is cruelty as an outcome. And that’s a big part of German behavior—cruelty towards those below them or those who are weaker or caught in an unfair position. The absence of sportsmanship is what makes German life feel so heavy, ominous, and brutal to us."
"Its growling rigidity, with all this," Anderson continued gravely, "is due to the fact that the old men are mainly in the saddle in Germany—men sixty and seventy. The existence and influence of young men are not as much in command as with us. These old Germans have disgruntled stomachs from so much drinking, and they roar about. Physical sports mean nothing to them. And so it seems sometimes as if the Germans are born old, not young. Their children are old. This helps make them such a serious race—the most serious. And yet people insist on believing that this serious race means nothing but fun[85] by all its military preparations. Where's the logic?"...
"Its growling rigidity, with all this," Anderson continued seriously, "comes from the fact that the old men are mostly in charge in Germany—men in their sixties and seventies. The role and impact of young men are not as prominent as they are here. These older Germans have upset stomachs from all the drinking, and they complain loudly. Physical sports don’t mean anything to them. It often feels like Germans are born old, not young. Their children seem old too. This contributes to them being such a serious people—the most serious. And still, people keep insisting that this serious nation is only about fun [85] despite all its military preparations. Where’s the logic?"
When the journalist went, Kirtley let him through the wall gate with its weighted rope. The gate flew back in place with a loud report as if to give emphasis to the old man's direful interpretations and prophecies.
When the journalist arrived, Kirtley opened the wall gate with its heavy rope. The gate slammed shut with a loud bang as if to emphasize the old man's grim interpretations and predictions.
CHAPTER XII
Kids and Habits
IN spite of Anderson, Gard could not make up his mind that Rudolph was anything more than a young braggadocio. The idea of an ordinary family living comfortably along with a spy in its midst, ready to inform on them and their guests, was so foreign to his notions, so caddish, that it weakened his confidence in his compatriot's judgment. While Gard felt that Rudi was not "straight," he could not consider him downright harmful. However, under the spur of the valuable significance that Anderson attached to this typical household life, Kirtley felt it profitable to observe closely its manifestations and opinions. They were verified in other German families where Gard often went with the Buchers. What could be more truly educational?
IN spite of Anderson, Gard couldn’t shake the feeling that Rudolph was just a young show-off. The idea of an ordinary family living comfortably with a spy among them, ready to inform on them and their guests, felt so alien to him, so underhanded, that it made him doubt his friend’s judgment. While Gard sensed that Rudi wasn’t "straight," he didn’t see him as outright dangerous. However, motivated by the importance Anderson placed on this typical family life, Kirtley thought it would be beneficial to closely observe its expressions and perspectives. They were confirmed in other German families where Gard often visited with the Buchers. What could be more truly educational?
[87]In defiance of the famous Teuton discipline, a certain disorderliness ran through the management of Villa Elsa. This surprised him. The eruptive way meals were served, the jumbled-up spectacle of the dining table, beds made up at any time of day, knitting and sewing going on in many rooms—all this was in unforeseen contrast to the rigorous military and educational training and precision. He could but compare the genre picture of looseness in the homes with that of the correct and fine army.
[87]In contrast to the well-known discipline of the Germans, there was a certain chaos in the management of Villa Elsa. This took him by surprise. The chaotic way meals were served, the cluttered dining table, beds being made at random times, and people knitting and sewing in several rooms— all of this stood in stark contrast to the strict military and educational training and precision. He could only compare the relaxed atmosphere in the homes with that of the orderly and polished army.
The inadequate, almost primitive, bathing facilities in Villa Elsa corresponded to the unscoured condition of its occupants. The unsightly hairiness of German skins seemed to answer for much washing. There was little thought of soap and hot water as a law of health, a delight, a luxury. Kirtley had assumed that soiled bodies did not betoken the loftiest state of man. But the bath was looked upon here as a disagreeable performance and accordingly was only indulged in at infrequent intervals. It was discussed freely at table as a forthcoming, dreaded event. Gard bathed in town. As for fresh underwear and[88] hose, they were talked of over soup like some new and rare dispensation of Providence.
The inadequate, almost basic, bathing facilities in Villa Elsa matched the unclean condition of its residents. The unsightly hairiness of German skin seemed to explain the lack of washing. There was little thought of soap and hot water as a necessity for health, a pleasure, or a luxury. Kirtley had thought that dirty bodies did not represent the highest state of humanity. But here, bathing was seen as an unpleasant chore and was only done sporadically. It was openly discussed at dinner as an upcoming, dreaded task. Gard bathed in town. As for clean underwear and[88] socks, they were mentioned over soup like some new and rare gift from Providence.
Fräulein alone had a toothbrush and powder, and they appeared rather conspicuously here and there as if they were modern ornaments of which the household was visibly proud. Bad breaths coming from decayed teeth and from stomachs sour with drink were freely blown about and without apologies. Indeed, apologies about anything were small features at all times.
Fräulein was the only one with a toothbrush and toothpaste, and they stood out here and there as if they were trendy accessories the household took pride in. Bad breath from decayed teeth and stomachs soured by alcohol was casually shared, without any apologies. In fact, saying sorry for anything was a rare occurrence back then.
There was no particular provision for the maid. Gard scarcely knew where or how she slept. Tekla dressed with unconcern in the kitchen and in the hall. Servant girls were rather considered like calves and therefore entitled to scant human consideration. The odors, the unsightly colors, the clatter of the German home, gave further evidence of the absence of sensitiveness, of any fine and balanced poise of nerves.
There wasn't any specific arrangement for the maid. Gard barely knew where or how she slept. Tekla got ready casually in the kitchen and in the hall. Maidservants were often thought of as little more than livestock and were given very little human respect. The smells, the unattractive colors, and the noise of the German household highlighted the lack of sensitivity and any kind of graceful balance of emotions.
This repulsiveness of existence, of course, did not affect the audible consciousness of the family about their representing the most progressive state of civilized man. And not to be forgotten was the German ill-temperedness, which was pronounced in the morning, and did[89] not wear off considerably until stomachs were filled during the day. All these facts testified that the Teuton little cultivates loveliness in human contact. Beauty of living is not, with him, a natural end to attain.
This ugliness of life, of course, didn’t impact the family's belief that they represented the most advanced stage of civilized society. And let's not forget the Germans' bad moods, which were evident in the morning and didn't really improve until everyone had eaten later in the day. All these points showed that Germans don’t value warmth in social interactions much. For them, the beauty of living isn’t a natural goal to strive for.
After awhile it came over Kirtley that the Buchers showed no interest in his antecedents or in his country. Their apparent ignorance of America was rivaled by their indifference about it. They evidently were of the firm conclusion that there was nothing worth while there to learn, nothing worthy of attention. It was, to them, an unprofitable jumble of peoples and things in a rudimentary, unvarnished state of development. It was Patagonia trying to copy the ways of Europe. This was but a feature of the Teuton tribal belief that all the racial evolutions outside the German borders were undesirable, demoralizing and mischievously blocking the outspread of Kultur.
After a while, Kirtley realized that the Buchers showed no interest in his background or his country. Their apparent ignorance of America was matched by their indifference towards it. They clearly believed there was nothing worthwhile to learn about it, nothing that deserved attention. To them, it was just a messy mix of people and things in a basic, unrefined state of development. It felt like Patagonia was trying to imitate Europe. This reflected the Teuton tribal belief that all the racial changes outside of Germany were undesirable, demoralizing, and actively hindering the spread of Kultur.
Gard could not but know of the limited income on which existence went on at Villa Elsa. It was characteristic. Though limited, the income was secure. Despite the economies practiced, the prevailing confidence and self-satisfaction did not suffer, as a result, the slightest impairment. It was significantly German.
Gard couldn't help but be aware of the limited income that kept things running at Villa Elsa. It was typical. Even though the income was minimal, it was secure. Despite the cutbacks being made, the overall sense of confidence and self-satisfaction remained completely intact. It was distinctly German.
[90]Gard said to himself:
Gard thought to himself:
"There are here none of the spectacular ups and downs, everlasting sudden changes and movings to and fro, riches one year, poverty the next, the unsettledness and acute money misfortunes, that make up so large a share of our feverish, restless, uncertain Yankee careers. There does not seem to be a synonym for 'hard up' in German. As for us Americans the habitual changes of location of the household, the separation of the parents for reasons of business, travel, or inharmonious temperaments, the resultant ever-growing crop of divorces, the frequent living apart of the children, both from fathers and mothers and from the home, the loose family ties and ignoring of kin who are not of the most immediate relationship—how far is all this from the steady, compact, solid, unanxious and unthreatened examples of Villa Elsa and German households in general!"
"There aren’t any wild ups and downs here, no sudden changes or constant moving around, no riches one year and poverty the next, and none of the instability and serious financial troubles that fill our frantic, restless, uncertain American lives. It seems there’s no equivalent for 'hard up' in German. For us Americans, the frequent moves of the household, parents separating for work, travel, or personal issues, the ever-increasing number of divorces, children often living apart from both their moms and dads as well as from home, the loose family connections, and the neglect of relatives who aren’t in the closest circle—this is so far removed from the steady, stable, solid, stress-free, and secure examples of Villa Elsa and German families overall!"
The Teutons had a paternal Government which they knew would not let them come to want. Their firesides could thrive and accomplish greatly on so small a basis because this was stationary and unfailing. The American needed so much more because, with him, all[91] was relatively unsafe. While he hesitated about rearing a large family for this reason among others, the German had no such thought of dodging the future, for he knew his children would be taken care of.
The Teutons had a supportive government that they knew would take care of them. Their homes could prosper and achieve a lot on such a small base because it was stable and reliable. The American needed much more because, for him, everything[91] was relatively uncertain. While he was hesitant to raise a large family for this reason and others, the German didn’t worry about the future, knowing his children would be looked after.
In fact, he raised his progeny conspicuously for the State. Parental feeling was secondary to the Kaiser's wishes. The Bucher children, like usual German children, were in effect dedicated to the Government, consecrated to its uses. It could come in and did come in and take this boy or girl for that and that one for this. It had designated Rudi for hydraulic engineering and indicated his university course to that end. Ernst was selected for philosophy. The parents were not only willing but proud of this. It was not for them to resent such outside interference because of any personal likes of their own.
In fact, he raised his children primarily for the State. Parental feelings were secondary to the Kaiser's wishes. The Bucher children, like typical German kids, were essentially dedicated to the Government, committed to its purpose. The State could, and did, come in and take this boy or girl for one role or another. It had designated Rudi for hydraulic engineering and specified his university path accordingly. Ernst was chosen for philosophy. The parents were not just willing but proud of this. They didn’t see a reason to resent such outside interference because of any personal preferences they might have had.
Gard wrote Rebner:
Gard messaged Rebner:
"In America, the child's future is somewhat a matter of buffeting back and forth aimlessly between teacher and parent. The latter is disposed to shirk the responsibility by leaning on the shoulders of the instructor who is inclined to keep shifting the burden back to the home. As a result, while the German youngster is[92] early being adapted to a particular future course for which Nature has given him an aptitude, his American competitor is often left to drift through the years without definite ambition, or at least with only a belated or partly drilled preparation therefor."
"In America, a child's future often feels like a back-and-forth struggle between teachers and parents. Parents tend to avoid taking responsibility and rely on teachers, who in turn keep shifting that responsibility back to the home. As a result, while German children are[92] guided early on toward a specific future that matches their natural skills, American kids often drift through the years without clear goals, or at best, with only a late or incomplete preparation for what lies ahead."
In Germany, Kirtley observed, the Government stood as the real father. The actual father was its representative. The mother played a subsidiary rôle. All was the father idea. The Germans call it Fatherland, not Motherland, as the English affectionately term their own country.
In Germany, Kirtley noticed that the Government was seen as the true father. The actual father acted as its representative. The mother had a secondary role. Everything was centered around the father concept. The Germans refer to it as Fatherland, not Motherland, like the English lovingly refer to their own country.
This interposition of the State in the Teuton family weakens the links of personal tenderness. The State rather than Love rules the home. Hence resulted the unfeelingness that Kirtley observed in the life about him in Loschwitz—the roughness so little tempered with affection, but, instead, frankly interpreted and exhibited as the true bearing of the dominant male's masculine nobility.
The involvement of the State in the Teuton family weakens the bonds of personal affection. The State, rather than Love, governs the home. This led to the insensitivity that Kirtley noticed in the life around him in Loschwitz—the harshness that was only slightly softened by love, but instead was openly expressed as the true demeanor of the dominant male's masculine nobility.
Quite normally, then, came about the extensive amount of open and violent quarreling which Gard noticed in the households. In Villa Elsa the Herr quarreled with the Frau, each quarreled with the children, they quarreled[93] with Tekla, and she took it out on the dogs. It was not disputing among self-respecting equals, but ill-humored domineering over those who were confessedly underneath.
Quite normally, then, the extensive amount of open and violent arguing that Gard noticed in the households took place. In Villa Elsa, the Mr. fought with the Mrs., each argued with the kids, they all argued[93] with Tekla, and she took it out on the dogs. It wasn’t a debate among equal adults, but rather bad-tempered bullying over those who were clearly lesser.
CHAPTER XIII
Down with America!
THE German text books that came in Gard's way proved the national craze for what was Deutsch, echt Deutsch, to the exclusion of what was not. It was almost a ferocity of inbreeding instruction. It created the furor Teutonicus. The Hohenzollerns used education as a prod to madden the Germans. It kept stirred up, with increasing exaggeration and rage, the racial rabidness on the subject of other nations.
THE German textbooks that came Gard's way revealed the national obsession with what was German, genuinely German, at the expense of everything else. It was almost a fierce form of exclusive education. This created the furor Teutonicus. The Hohenzollerns used education to provoke and rile up the Germans. It continually stirred up, with growing exaggeration and fury, the racial fervor regarding other nations.
Kirtley still did not believe that this reached to America and Americans, for which topics, as already indicated, the Buchers had shown small curiosity in their intercourse with him, seldom mentioning the names. But his eyes were abruptly opened wide with astonishment and concealed indignation one evening at dinner.
Kirtley still didn't believe that this had any connection to America and Americans, since, as previously mentioned, the Buchers had shown little interest in those topics during their conversations with him, rarely bringing up the names. But one evening at dinner, his eyes were suddenly opened wide with shock and hidden anger.
It was a habit for the family, when nothing[95] was pressing, to remain at table discussing this and that, nearly always providing the theme was German. He encouraged this because he could learn from the well-stocked information which the members possessed about Germany and the Germans, and for the further reason of conversational opportunities.
It was a routine for the family, when nothing[95] urgent was at hand, to stay at the table chatting about various topics, almost always related to Germany. He supported this because he could gain insights from the wealth of knowledge the family had about Germany and the Germans, and also for the sake of having conversation opportunities.
It may be best to try to reproduce the scene in outline as it occurred. The talk had fallen upon governments, nations, peoples—a general field of inquiry for which Kirtley had had some predilection at college. The vast superiority of the German Government had been again, as often before, so emphasized in Villa Elsa that he felt now that he ought to raise a question. Should this overweening assumption always pass unnoticed, unqualified?
It might be best to outline the scene as it happened. The conversation shifted to governments, nations, and peoples—a broad topic Kirtley had been interested in during college. The overwhelming superiority of the German Government had been highlighted once again, just as it often was at Villa Elsa, and he felt it was time to ask a question. Should this excessive confidence always go unchallenged and unaddressed?
It was partly because the foreigner avoided disputing with the Germans, who made discussion unpleasant by their acrid, dictatorial manners and drowning diapasons, that their arrogance had so rapidly grown out of bounds. They do not recognize courtesies in debate, fly off the handle, burst in with interruptions on the half-finished statements and sentences of others.
It was partly because the foreigner avoided arguing with the Germans, who made discussions unpleasant with their harsh, domineering attitudes and overwhelming voices, that their arrogance had quickly gotten out of control. They don’t acknowledge politeness in debates, lose their tempers easily, and interrupt others with half-finished thoughts and sentences.
Besides, Kirtley had not yet fully learned[96] that they have not the same understanding of things, not the same definitions for the same words. For instance, the Buchers insisted that the Germans had the most freedom of any nation. But their freedom meant something like the liberty allowed in a prison yard. Free press? Yes, it was to be found in Deutschland in its highest state, since it was always authoritative. And there authority meant liberty of opinion. Again, thought was the most free and liberal there, because, as it seemed, the German was free to think just as the Kaiser thought. Equity? Equity was only what the Teutons wanted, and therefore of the most desirable type. And so on.
Besides, Kirtley hadn’t yet fully realized[96] that they didn’t share the same understanding of things or the same definitions for the same words. For example, the Buchers claimed that the Germans had more freedom than any other nation. But their idea of freedom was more like the liberty granted in a prison yard. Free press? Yes, it existed in Germany, but it was always under control. And there, authority meant freedom of opinion. Again, thought was considered the most free and open there because, apparently, Germans were free to think just like the Kaiser did. Equity? Equity was only what the Teutons wanted, and so it was viewed as the most desirable kind. And so on.
Such differences were usually antipodal—diametrically opposed. The reason, Gard worked out, was that in America and other democratic lands the significance of such words sprang from the common people upward. In Germany such interpretations proceeded essentially from the reigning family downward. Discussions under such circumstances, instead of leading toward mutual understanding, breed acrimony. There is little room for shadings, amicable approachments, progress in the direction of reciprocal enlightenment.
Such differences were often completely opposed. Gard figured out that in America and other democratic countries, the meaning of such words came from the common people and worked its way up. In Germany, those interpretations mainly came from the ruling family and worked their way down. Discussions in these situations, rather than fostering mutual understanding, lead to bitterness. There’s little space for nuance, friendly discussions, or progress toward mutual enlightenment.
[97]It was a nest of blustering, pugnacious hornets which Kirtley poked up on the evening in question, by asking:
[97]It was a swarm of aggressive, combative hornets that Kirtley stirred up that evening by asking:
"How do you prove that the German Government is the best?"
"How do you show that the German government is the best?"
The Herr, taking his knife from his mouth—the Teuton eats conspicuously with his knife—suddenly showed that he had evidently, in the presence of his American guest, long held himself in on this subject with ill-feelings that clamored to be let loose.
The man, taking his knife out of his mouth—the German eats noticeably with his knife—suddenly revealed that he had clearly been holding back his negative feelings about this topic in front of his American guest for a long time.
"Prove it? Prove it?" he hoarsely exclaimed. "It needs no proof. Everybody knows it. Could we have the greatest people without the best Government? Could we have the best education without the best Government? Why does everybody come to Germany to study? Why did you come? It's because these things are true. Did you ever hear of young Germans going elsewhere to universities? They do not need to. We have the best."
"Prove it? Prove it?" he said hoarsely. "It doesn't need proof. Everyone knows it. Can we have great people without a great government? Can we have the best education without a great government? Why does everyone come to Germany to study? Why did you come? It's because these things are true. Have you ever heard of young Germans going to other countries for university? They don't need to. We have the best."
The family were up in arms. Their Government had been questioned. Each member, with the exception of Fräulein, who was "at class," was bursting to talk about America. It had no army. Therefore it amounted to[98] little. It had no higher education worthy of the name. It had only one institution that could claim to be called a university. It had no aristocracy. It was a country of low, lawless classes. These and similar sentences flew back at Kirtley, whose face reddened. The mask was being at last hurled off. What self-control, indeed, had the family before maintained, when they were so armed with displeasure concerning the United States! He would not have credited it. It was at least illuminating, if blinding. For what could be the excuse, provocation? Nothing that he had ever heard of. The two peoples had been so separate and distinct. The words of Anderson rushed into his mind. "The Germans can hate people they've never known, never seen. They hate on principle and without principle."
The family was really upset. Their government had been challenged. Every member, except for Fräulein, who was "at class," was eager to talk about America. It had no army, so it seemed to matter very little. It had no real higher education to speak of. It had only one institution that could even be called a university. It had no aristocracy. It was a land of low, lawless classes. Sentences like these flew back at Kirtley, making his face flush. The facade was finally coming off. What self-control the family had managed to maintain while being so displeased with the United States was surprising! He wouldn't have believed it. It was certainly enlightening, if overwhelming. Because what could be the reason or provocation? Nothing he had ever heard of. The two nations had been so separate and distinct. Anderson's words rushed into his mind: "The Germans can hate people they've never known, never seen. They hate on principle and without principle."
Knives and forks figured in the air, beer mugs were grabbed and banged down, napkins took refuge under the table as if in fright, to be indiscriminately dirtied under foot. The gulped down food, meeting the oncoming throaty expressions of irritability, created much alimentary confusion. Gard almost trembled. Here he had been for weeks dwelling in a friendly society, in an intimate rela[99]tionship, without any realization of what ugly thoughts were secretly leveled at him in the form of a political unit. As an individual, he had been most welcome. As a citizen of the United States he was despised. The Herr vociferated:
Knives and forks clattered in the air, beer mugs were snatched and slammed down, napkins hid under the table as if scared, only to be soiled on the floor. The food being gobbled down, mixed with the growing signs of annoyance, created a lot of confusion. Gard could barely keep it together. For weeks, he had been part of a friendly group, in a close relationship, completely unaware of the ugly thoughts directed at him as part of a political group. As an individual, he was welcomed. But as a citizen of the United States, he was loathed. The Herr shouted:
"What is your country, tell me, what is your country? It is nichts, nichts. It is not a country. It is a ragout, a potpourri, a mess. We do not recognize such a country. It has no beginnings, no tradition, no unity of blood, no ideals——" He choked and the Frau flared forth while attempting to crack a nut between her teeth.
"What’s your country? Tell me, what’s your country? It’s nothing, nothing. It’s not a country. It’s a mix, a jumble, a mess. We can’t recognize such a country. It has no beginnings, no tradition, no unity of blood, no ideals——" He choked and the woman flared up while trying to crack a nut between her teeth.
"The American people are the off-scourings of Europe. They were criminals, atheists, diseased people, failures, who were sent away from Europe. So they go and try to found a new race, a new nation. They try, but they fail of course...."
"The American people are the rejects of Europe. They were criminals, non-believers, sick individuals, and failures who were sent away from Europe. So they go and attempt to create a new race, a new nation. They try, but they obviously fail...."
When his mother got out of breath, little Ernst began with a milder, more judicial air, though he seemed partly to have memorized official declarations.
When his mom got out of breath, little Ernst started speaking in a calmer, more formal tone, although it seemed like he had partially memorized official statements.
"Don't you think, Herr Kirtley, it stands to reason that our reigning family, which is admitted to be honest and has practiced ruling[100] for centuries, knows better how to govern a race than the always new and untried persons who keep taking the reins of government in a democracy? The Americans can never tell far ahead who is to rule. There are changes all the time. How can the citizen prepare confidently for the future? How can he plan long ahead as we do? I have always read that this is the reason things are so steady and stable in Germany and so uncertain and wabbling in America. This uncertainty hanging over a republic unsettles its population. You have panics, lynchings, graft. We are free of such scourges. Our Government is always the same unit and to be relied on. If new policies are begun, it is there to carry them through to their logical end, even if it takes a generation or longer. You have always new statesmen with new ideas. We no sooner learn to know of one of your politicians than he is dropped and we must read about another in control. How does that make for any well-considered and thoroughly demonstrated plans? Would it not be the natural result that the German people are completely contented and the American people are always discontented?"
"Don't you think, Mr. Kirtley, it makes sense that our reigning family, which is recognized as honest and has been ruling[100] for centuries, knows better how to govern a nation than the constantly changing and untested individuals who keep taking over in a democracy? Americans can never predict who will be in charge far in advance. There are changes all the time. How can citizens prepare confidently for the future? How can they plan long-term like we do? I've always read that this is why things are so steady and stable in Germany and so uncertain and shaky in America. This uncertainty in a republic disrupts its population. You have panics, lynchings, corruption. We are free from such problems. Our government is always the same and can be counted on. If new policies are introduced, the government sees them through to their logical conclusion, even if it takes a generation or more. You have constantly new politicians with new ideas. We barely get to know one of your leaders before they are replaced, and we have to read about someone else in charge. How does that lead to well-considered and thoroughly tested plans? Wouldn’t the natural outcome be that the German people are entirely content while the American people are always dissatisfied?"
[101]Rudolph's excited pronouncements ran along a different line, interchanged with voluminous whiffs of tobacco.
[101]Rudolph's enthusiastic statements flowed in a different direction, mixed with thick clouds of tobacco smoke.
"Under our Government, Herr Kirtley, the German flag is seen in all parts of the globe. And wherever it is seen, it is respected, feared. Who ever sees the American flag? Even I don't know what it looks like. It is not feared. It is only noticed out of voluntary courtesy. And a nation can't be really great without an army like ours. The army is the spine of the country. It makes a country a vertebrate. What would even Germany be without its army? Almost nothing. The army consolidates, trains, disciplines. It gives us health, good constitutions, industrious habits, exactness. It makes a nation superior because it fortifies human effort. In the constant changing of our regiments about to different sections of the Empire, our soldiers come to be well acquainted everywhere. They make friends and are at home in every direction. They learn to realize how great we are and this strengthens the German feeling and makes all parts of the nation one.
"Under our government, Mr. Kirtley, the German flag can be seen all over the world. And wherever it appears, it is respected and feared. Who even sees the American flag? I don’t even know what it looks like. It's not feared; it's noticed only out of courtesy. A nation can't be truly great without a powerful army like ours. The army is the backbone of the country. It gives a country structure. What would Germany be without its army? Almost nothing. The army unites, trains, and disciplines. It promotes health, good habits, and precision. It makes a nation superior because it supports human effort. With the constant movement of our regiments to different parts of the Empire, our soldiers become familiar everywhere. They make friends and feel at home in every direction. They come to understand how great we are, which strengthens the sense of German unity and brings all parts of the nation together."
"Of course we have the only first-class army. All our General Staff has to do any[102] day is to say the word and, as I have so often said, our army can go out and defeat the world. Our navy will soon be in a position to destroy England's. We are getting her trade routes, her mail routes. Our goods are now selling everywhere. It is not only because they are the best and the cheapest, but because our army and our navy stand behind them to make people know what is best for them. Every little German box of goods has a big gun behind it. Of course we don't need to use the gun—yet—because people are crying for our manufactures all over the world. If we had occupied your big and half-developed country in your place, we would have long ago been the only great State. There would have been no others. We would have annihilated them if they were not willing to become German provinces."
"Of course, we have the only top-notch army. All our General Staff has to do any[102] day is give the word, and as I've often said, our army can go out and defeat anyone. Our navy will soon be able to take down England's. We're gaining control over her trade routes and her mail routes. Our products are selling everywhere. It's not just because they're the best and the cheapest, but because our army and navy back them up to make people recognize what's best for them. Every little German package of goods has a big gun behind it. Of course, we don’t need to use the gun—yet—because people around the world are clamoring for our products. If we had taken over your large and underdeveloped country instead, we would have long ago established ourselves as the only great nation. There would have been no others. We would have wiped them out if they weren’t willing to become German provinces."
Rudi took a long pull at his cigarette, with his elbows outspread like the haughty wings of the Prussian eagles of war. Emitting a long streamer of smoke, he summed up the whole thing in a nutshell with a derisory—Pouf!
Rudi took a long drag on his cigarette, his elbows spread out like the arrogant wings of the Prussian eagles of war. Blowing out a long stream of smoke, he boiled it all down with a contemptuous—Pouf!
Kirtley was inwardly fired up with resentment. Then he had to smother a laugh. This exhibition of the family taken off its guard was more instructive than volumes of discus[103]sion he might read about the true German attitude toward America—toward everyone. Were these but Goths with the German skins scratched off a little? He kept thinking of Anderson—how it furnished the pure evidence of what the latter was despairing of before deaf ears! Gard's respect, his sympathy, for the old man, jumped up with patriotic fervor.
Kirtley was internally burning with resentment. Then he had to hold back a laugh. This display of the family caught off guard was more enlightening than countless discussions he could read about the real German attitude toward America—toward everyone. Were they just Goths with their German skins slightly peeled away? He kept thinking of Anderson—how it provided clear proof of what the latter was hopelessly trying to convey to uninterested listeners! Gard's respect and sympathy for the old man surged with patriotic passion.
He marveled at first how the good Buchers had been primed with this knowledge, these comparisons. Then he realized that the editorials and other articles in the Dresden journals, whose lengthy, heavy, pounding sentences confused with an obtuse, inverted syntax he was reading at Anderson's suggestion, accounted for these venomous conceptions and prejudices.
He was amazed at how well-informed the Buchers were about this knowledge and these comparisons. Then he figured out that the editorials and other articles in the Dresden newspapers, with their long, complicated sentences and confusing, backward syntax that he was reading on Anderson's recommendation, were the source of these harsh ideas and biases.
"So it is our duty to hate," broke in the Herr once more, with croaks and grunts now behind his long porcelain pipe which roved down over his stomach, a green tassel dangling at the end. "We give our children beatings to educate them, don't we? So we have the best education. We must give the world a beating to improve it."
"So it’s our responsibility to hate," interjected the Herr again, his voice raspy and gruff behind his long porcelain pipe that rested on his belly, a green tassel swinging from the end. "We discipline our children to teach them, right? That way, they get the best education. We need to give the world a beating to make it better."
The Frau all the while could hardly restrain herself.
The woman could barely hold herself back the whole time.
"You know what we in Germany call[104] Americans? We call them pigs—yes, pigs. America is like a big pig pen where everybody is wallowing over everybody for money—just for money."
"You know what we in Germany call[104] Americans? We call them pigs—yeah, pigs. America is like a huge pigpen where everyone is rolling around over each other for cash—just for cash."
"And Germany," added her elder son, "is just waiting till the United States gets money enough, then we go in with our navy and our army and take it all."
"And Germany," added her older son, "is just waiting until the United States has enough money, then we’ll come in with our navy and our army and take it all."
Gard wanted to see how far they would go, and he had seen. Was this the old barbarian of the north risen to earth again, his rude garments of hide torn off, exposing him in his pristine, fighting nakedness? Where was the German under it all—the German who was taken to be civilized in heart and spirit as other men are? These law-abiding, stay-at-home people had deliberately grown in Villa Elsa this robust plant of contempt, so full-blossomed now and ready to exhale its noisome fumes which at moments almost stifled Kirtley with their poison. What would Rebner say to this with his golden, soul-felt opinions of the excelling race!
Gard wanted to see how far they would go, and he had seen. Was this the old barbarian of the north back among them, his rough animal skins stripped away, revealing his unrefined, raw power? Where was the civilized German beneath it all—the German who was thought to be as cultured in heart and spirit as everyone else? These law-abiding, homebody folks had intentionally nurtured this strong plant of contempt in Villa Elsa, now fully bloomed and ready to release its foul stench that almost suffocated Kirtley with its toxicity at times. What would Rebner think about this with his lofty, heartfelt views on the superior race!
This hospitable and apparently harmless domicile was, in reality, like a martial encampment. Gard could not but conclude that he would have to leave Loschwitz. How could he[105] for a moment stay in face of these direct and hard-fisted attacks? And certainly Villa Elsa would not want to harbor a hog any longer. The similar households he had come to know, all such households, unquestionably bore the same furious grudges against the western hemisphere.
This welcoming and seemingly innocent home was, in fact, like a military camp. Gard realized he had to leave Loschwitz. How could he[105] possibly stay in the face of these direct and forceful attacks? And surely Villa Elsa wouldn’t want to keep a nuisance any longer. The other households he had encountered all shared the same intense resentment toward the western hemisphere.
But Elsa? How could he leave her—like this? She was the first girl to excite seriously his affections. She seemed to strike the note of whatever was truly earnest in him. Yet did she, too, think Americans were pigs? Did she consider him of such an inferior breed? Perhaps, in her misled innocence, she did. Perhaps that was the reason why she acted toward him in an upsetting fashion which only the more tempted a certain tenacious element in his make-up.
But Elsa? How could he leave her—like this? She was the first girl to truly stir his feelings. She seemed to resonate with whatever was genuinely sincere in him. But did she also think Americans were terrible? Did she see him as being of a lower class? Maybe, in her misguided innocence, she did. Perhaps that’s why she treated him in a way that only made a certain stubborn part of him want to pursue her even more.
CHAPTER XIV
Aftermath
THIS astonishing outbreak in Villa Elsa was followed by something still more singular to Kirtley, or at least out of his reckoning. It was to stir the depths of his contemplations and comparisons and give him the sharpest look into German character he had yet received. It was to show him that a gaping abyss might be separating the Teuton from other western humanity. Having latterly doubted that the race was easy of sympathetic grasp, any true kinship, he now profoundly realized that instead of being able to approach it nearer in feeling the more he knew it, he was encountering very high cliffs that threatened forever to mark an inaccessible boundary line.
THIM surprising incident in Villa Elsa was followed by something even more unexpected for Kirtley, or at least beyond his expectations. It would deeply challenge his thoughts and comparisons and give him the clearest insight into German character he had ever experienced. It would reveal to him that there might be a vast divide separating the Germans from other Western people. Recently, he had doubted that the culture was easily relatable or had any true connection; now he profoundly realized that instead of getting closer to it emotionally the more he learned, he was facing steep cliffs that seemed to forever mark an unreachable boundary.
He had taken it for granted that the anti-American outburst would end the Buchers' relations with him. He must have turned out to[107] be very unwelcome. The very sight of him as one of the American pigs about the house must have been most unsatisfactory, distasteful. They could not from now on visibly wish him or any Yankee in their home. Their personal dignity could not permit their assault to be backed up afterward by any equivocal conduct toward him.
He had assumed that the backlash against America would end the Buchers' relationship with him. He must have seemed very unwelcome. Just his presence as one of the American invaders in their home must have been incredibly off-putting. From now on, they couldn't openly want him or any American in their space. Their pride wouldn’t allow them to support their previous aggression with any mixed signals toward him.
Then, too, they would expect that he would not want to remain. Had they not voluntarily, deliberately, hurled at him their defiant scorn of his people? Self-respect would demand his immediate departure.
Then, they would also think that he wouldn't want to stay. Hadn't they willingly thrown their defiant contempt for his people at him? His self-respect would require him to leave right away.
As for himself, Gard passed a sleepless night thinking hotly about the episode. Toward morning he cooled off. These were boors. Why should he take to heart their boorishness? Richness was here indeed. Just the place to keep finding out the real German. Having let the bars down with such a bang and hullabaloo, the family would from now on readily and fully reveal themselves. It is a poor investigator and observer who is easily shied away from his purpose by taunts and ill-breeding.
As for himself, Gard spent a sleepless night fuming about the incident. By morning, he had calmed down. These people were just rude. Why let their rudeness bother him? There was wealth here, for sure. This was the perfect place to continue discovering the real Germany. Having let loose with such a fuss and noise, the family would now openly show their true selves. A good investigator and observer isn’t easily put off their goal by insults and bad behavior.
But the miracle was that the Buchers went on exactly as before. They obviously saw no[108] reasons for altering their friendly daily intercourse, nor did they have any idea that he should harbor a grievance. Beginning with the next morning, their usual amicable bearing and attentions continued uninterrupted. The family was not conscious of having tried to give mortal offense or to cause resentment from him.
But the surprising thing was that the Buchers carried on just like before. They clearly saw no[108] reason to change their friendly daily interactions, nor did they think he should have any hard feelings. Beginning the next morning, their usual friendly attitude and attention continued without interruption. The family wasn’t aware that they had tried to offend him or make him feel bitter.
For, to a German, blows in all senses are a normal part of living. His social habits indulge themselves in knocks, coarse attacks, unseemly abuse, as rather matters of course. He wields a bludgeon where more refined men would cut down with sarcasm or wither one with disdain. Blows are his natural method of instructing others and of getting himself instructed. "Good German blows" are what the Kaiser talked of loudly. To strike as well as to kick is a wholesome, healthful, righteous procedure, not to be grieved over, not to be kept rankling in the bosom. It is truth and fact in action, and action should always be forceful and decisive to be effective. The whipping of a school boy for any just cause should not be remembered by him throughout life as something to be allowed to fester or as calling for angry vengeance.
For a German, physical blows are just a normal part of life. His social interactions often involve rough hits, harsh insults, and unrefined behavior, seen as completely normal. He uses force where more polite people would use sarcasm or disdain. Striking others is his way of teaching and learning. The Kaiser proudly spoke of "good German blows." Both hitting and kicking are considered healthy, righteous actions that shouldn’t be regretted or allowed to fester inside. They represent truth and reality in action, and action should always be strong and decisive to have an impact. A schoolboy should not remember being punished for a good reason as something to hold onto or retaliate against for the rest of his life.
[109]So Gard's hosts pursued the tenor of their ways as if that detonating night had witnessed nothing. Their insensitiveness about it included insensitiveness about him. In other words, he discovered that as you cannot insult a German, therefore he cannot insult you. He does not know about such things in the Anglo-Saxon meaning. His conception of social and moral values is so obtusely or radically different from those of the truly occidental civilizations that there is little common ground here. Consequently, in such relations, the Teuton does not feel anything to be sorry for. There is nothing for him to worry about in any shame the next day.
[109]So Gard's group continued on as if that explosive night had never happened. Their lack of sensitivity about it included a lack of sensitivity towards him. In other words, he realized that since you can’t insult a German, they can’t really insult you either. They don’t understand those kinds of things in the Anglo-Saxon sense. Their view of social and moral values is so bluntly or radically different from those of the truly Western civilizations that there's hardly any common ground. As a result, in those relationships, the German feels nothing to regret. There’s nothing for them to worry about regarding any shame the next day.
Kirtley learned gradually, through his dealings with tradesmen and in hearing business men talk in the cafés, that this underbred attitude extended into the German secular world. A German may cheat you, lie to you, take a grossly unfair advantage of your good faith, but he will not expect that this is going to interfere with a continuance of your business relations. It is only a part of the hard game of gain. If you indignantly enumerate to him the facts of your unpleasant discovery, he sees little about which to bear a grudge. He[110] is not humiliated. He merely and unfortunately did not succeed, or succeeded while unluckily you found him out.
Kirtley gradually learned, through his interactions with tradesmen and by listening to businesspeople talk in cafés, that this crude attitude was common in the German secular world. A German might cheat you, lie to you, or take a seriously unfair advantage of your trust, but he won't think it’s going to affect your business relationship. It's just part of the tough game of making money. If you angrily outline the details of your unpleasant discovery to him, he sees nothing to feel bitter about. He[110] doesn't feel embarrassed. He just unfortunately didn't succeed, or he was unlucky enough for you to catch him.
Likewise if one lies to him, cheats him or otherwise mistreats him in a transaction, he does not permanently lay it up against the evil-doer. For he knows he would have done the same thing under similar circumstances. He is prepared to go on next week with the usual dealings. Of course he will complain with prompt vigor, and rage in his favorite fashion, but it is only because of his material loss or discomfort, not because of broken standards of trusted faith lying dishonored in the dust.
Similarly, if someone lies to him, cheats him, or treats him poorly in a transaction, he doesn't hold onto it forever against the wrongdoer. He understands he would likely have done the same in a similar situation. He’s ready to continue with normal business next week. Of course, he will complain loudly and react angrily in his usual way, but that's just because of his financial loss or discomfort, not because of any shattered expectations of trust left in the dust.
All this alien side of German character thus came to be lain before Gard like a scroll unrolled. He read its lines with eyes blinking in wonderment. And this was the people who were to lead the earth.
All this strange aspect of the German character was laid out before Gard like an unrolled scroll. He read its lines with eyes wide in amazement. And this was the people who were meant to lead the world.
The only part of it he felt the Buchers did not comprehend and were disappointed about, was that he did not candidly acknowledge the porcine truth of all they had shouted at him. He was of a heterogeneous conglomeration called Yankees. He should admit it. He was stupid not to. For him not to join in the[111] Bucher chorus of Germany's greatness was a poor return for all they were doing for his ease and profit. But he was an American and of course the Americans—
The only thing he felt the Buchers didn’t understand and were let down by was that he didn’t openly recognize the harsh truth in everything they had yelled at him. He was part of a diverse group called Yankees. He should just admit it. It was foolish of him not to. For him not to join in the [111] Bucher chorus celebrating Germany’s greatness was a poor way to repay all they were doing for his comfort and benefit. But he was an American and of course the Americans—
It must be quickly acknowledged, it is true, that Kirtley's experiences and observations along these channels did not necessarily show that the Teuton is less honest than others. Let it be granted that he is fully as upright as anyone in the sum total of his commercial transactions. The point Gard uncovered was that here were full-fledged race traits and habitudes which stood counter to Christian ideals, were pagan in type, were due to a lower stratum of moral and social perceptions.
It should be recognized quickly that Kirtley's experiences and observations in these areas did not necessarily prove that the Teuton is less honest than others. It's fair to say he is just as upright as anyone when it comes to his overall commercial dealings. The point Gard revealed was that there were well-developed racial traits and habits that went against Christian ideals, were pagan in nature, and stemmed from a lower level of moral and social awareness.
The explosion in Villa Elsa led him on to another revealment. What was it but a rather puerile performance? Tactless, boisterous youngsters blurt out the disagreeable sentiments of a household. The Buchers had acted like children. Laying aside all question of the wonderful German trained mind, knowledge, efficiency, Gard observed so much that was boy-like and girl-like in the adult Teuton life. No country has such a wealth of toys and juvenile story books as Germany. The Teuton weaves his nursery tales, so grotesque and[112] strikingly cruel, into his grown-up years. All this influence continues with him and affects him strongly as long as he lives. The mature German can kick, sulk, whine, much as his offspring do. When irritated he can easily act like an enfant terrible.
The explosion in Villa Elsa led him to another realization. What was it but a pretty childish performance? Tactless, noisy youngsters blurt out the unpleasant feelings of a household. The Buchers had behaved like kids. Putting aside any thoughts of the impressive German-trained mind, knowledge, and efficiency, Gard noticed so much that was childlike in adult German life. No country has as many toys and children’s storybooks as Germany. The German weaves his nursery tales, which are so grotesque and strikingly cruel, into his adult years. All this influence stays with him and affects him strongly for the rest of his life. The grown-up German can kick, sulk, and whine just like his kids do. When annoyed, he can easily act like an enfant terrible.
What is quaint, droll, distorted, comically ugly, or of a gingerbready effect, in Germany, is the expression of this childish strain. And it appeals particularly there to the youthfulness that remains in the hearts of visiting foreigners. It is accordingly one of the most popular Teuton aspects, especially among women and the young.
What is quirky, funny, weird, comically unattractive, or has a sugary charm in Germany reflects this childlike quality. It especially attracts the youthful spirit that still exists in the hearts of visiting foreigners. As a result, it is one of the most popular aspects of German culture, particularly among women and young people.
CHAPTER XV
Military Dummies
GARD'S attentions to Elsa continued intermittently, and as if detached, on their unadvancing course. He had, however, reached the stage of playing piano duets with her. This is always hopeful. Occasionally they rambled through Schubert's little Vienna love waltzes and other selections that could top off an evening with melodies of a sprightly and sentimental nature. He felt he was becoming acquainted with her in a way he otherwise could not. She was more cheerful at these times, exhilarated by the music.
GARD'S attention to Elsa continued sporadically, as if on a course that wasn't progressing. However, he had gotten to the point of playing piano duets with her, which was always a good sign. Sometimes they would play Schubert's charming Vienna love waltzes and other pieces that could brighten up an evening with lively and sentimental tunes. He felt like he was getting to know her in a way he couldn't otherwise. She seemed happier during these moments, filled with energy from the music.
He had learned a large part of his playing by ear. Reading at sight was a fresh experience. She corrected his fingering while helping fill out his conversational vocabulary. It was certainly most agreeable to have Fräulein take his fingers in her warm, plump,[114] flexible hand with conscientious authority and show him the method of the Dresden Conservatoire.
He had picked up a lot of his playing by ear. Sight-reading was a new experience for him. She fixed his fingering while also helping him expand his conversational vocabulary. It was definitely pleasant to have Fräulein take his fingers in her warm, plump, [114] flexible hand with a sense of authority and show him the methods from the Dresden Conservatoire.
Think of a young and lustrous miss being able to instruct him like a veteran! He had never considered American girls in such a light—had never expected to learn anything of profitable skill from them. Elsa, for her part, regarded it as a curious and amusing experience to watch this tall man playing like a boy. The musical Germans she knew were adept at some instrument.
Think of a young and vibrant woman being able to teach him like a pro! He had never viewed American girls this way—had never thought he could learn any useful skills from them. Elsa, for her part, found it a strange and funny experience to see this tall man acting like a boy. The musical Germans she knew were skilled at playing some instrument.
He formed the habit of adding en, or its variants, to the English equivalent of the German word he could not think of, and she seemed to be struck by this as a very original fashion of eliciting information. On one occasion at the piano they heard the entrance bell below clang, announcing a visitor, and Gard, hastening to disappear upstairs, exclaimed:
He got into the habit of adding en, or its variations, to the English equivalent of the German word he couldn’t recall, and she found this to be a very creative way of asking for information. One time at the piano, they heard the entrance bell ringing downstairs, indicating a visitor, and Gard, quickly rushing to head upstairs, exclaimed:
"Wir müssen—wir müssen—stopfen!"
"We need to— we need to—stuff!"
The word for stop would not come to him. Fräulein blushed and snickered and ran off to tell her mother about Herr Kirtley and his German. He was frightened. What absurdity had he uttered? He got to his diction[115]ary as soon as he could and found he had said—We must darn stockings!
The word for stop wouldn’t come to him. The young woman blushed, giggled, and ran off to tell her mother about Mr. Kirtley and his German. He felt scared. What nonsense had he said? He grabbed his dictionary as quickly as he could and discovered he had said—We must darn stockings!
The incident nearly always put Elsa in good humor. She doubtless considered Yankees an odd folk. How could they expect to become civilized with their rudimentary attainments? Must he not be seeming to her a sort of freak?...
The incident almost always put Elsa in a good mood. She definitely thought Yankees were strange people. How could they expect to be civilized with their basic skills? Didn’t he seem like a kind of oddity to her?
But, for the most part, she continued to hold him aloof, and he concluded the reason lay in the mystery which shadowed her young life and to which he could trace no clue. What could it frankly be that sent her to her room and to Heine? The beginning of the answer seemed to come at last in the form of a youth who suddenly soared in at Villa Elsa.
But for the most part, she kept him at a distance, and he figured the reason had to do with the mystery surrounding her young life, which he couldn't make sense of. What could it possibly be that made her retreat to her room and to Heine? The start of an answer finally seemed to arrive in the form of a young man who unexpectedly showed up at Villa Elsa.
Herr Friedrich von Tielitz-Leibach was a composer and a music director. He was the son of a neighbor who had moved away, and the musical Buchers doted on him as one with a shining future. Kirtley had often heard them refer to Friedrich as to so many of their friends of whom he knew nothing.
Herr Friedrich von Tielitz-Leibach was a composer and a music director. He was the son of a neighbor who had moved away, and the musical Buchers were very fond of him, considering him someone with a bright future. Kirtley had often heard them mention Friedrich, just like many of their friends he knew nothing about.
When Friedrich called, at very rare intervals, it was always a wonderful day. The steady, stolid routine of the home became perturbed, gladdened. He was a German of Hun[116]garian extraction, and the Magyar blood gave him a dash and sparkle. He was tall, very thin, with the intellectual look that black-rimmed glasses produce. His eyes harmonized in color with the black shock of tossing hair that set off a distinguished appearance. And, like a traditional votary of music, he wore a great black cloak swinging around him with an operatic air, giving the impression that he was just going to or coming from the theater.
When Friedrich called, which he did very rarely, it was always a special day. The steady, routine life at home became disrupted and joyful. He was a German of Hungarian descent, and his Magyar heritage gave him a lively spark. He was tall and very thin, with the kind of intellectual look that black-rimmed glasses bring. His eyes matched the color of his dark, flowing hair, which gave him a distinguished look. And, like a classical music lover, he wore a long black cloak that swirled around him with a theatrical flair, making it seem as if he was just heading to or coming from the theater.
Highly agitated, gilded with flattery, readily acquainted, he bubbled over promptly in confidences and intimate allusions. He was ever brimming with the freshest gossip of himself and his exalted career; and his personal experiences, he assumed, were bound to be unique and entertaining.
Highly agitated, overflowing with compliments, and quick to make connections, he immediately spilled his secrets and personal hints. He was always full of the latest gossip about himself and his impressive career; and he believed his personal stories were definitely one-of-a-kind and entertaining.
Making friends with everyone, he insisted on calling on Gard up in the attic room, pleased to welcome such an "excellent person"—as he had heard downstairs—to the fold of the family. But did they not lead such dull, stagnant, imbecile lives, moored here in this stodgy, out-of-the-world suburb, where so many idiots live who wonder how the world can come to an end when it's round? Friedrich[117] truly hoped Herr Kirtley would not be bored to death.
Making friends with everyone, he insisted on visiting Gard in the attic room, excited to welcome such an "excellent person"—as he had heard downstairs—into the family. But didn’t they lead such boring, stagnant, clueless lives, stuck here in this dull, out-of-the-way suburb, where so many idiots wonder how the world can end when it's round? Friedrich[117] truly hoped Herr Kirtley wouldn’t be bored to death.
To-day the musician had finished with his final military examination and was at last free from ever having to serve. He made a diverting story of it and had hastened to the Villa to recount the congratulatory news.
To day the musician had completed his last military exam and was finally free from the obligation to serve. He made an entertaining story out of it and quickly went to the Villa to share the good news.
"I had to report this morning for military service, just having got back to Dresden. So I went to the Platz and there sat an officer as big as a hogshead. And I hope not as full. He began treating me as if I were a truant school boy. 'Stand up! Sit down! Stand up again!' So the examination commenced. I knew I was not fit for the army. I did not want to go. I hate it. But they were after me. He said:
"I had to show up this morning for military service, just having returned to Dresden. So I went to the square, and there sat an officer as big as a cask. And I hope he wasn't as full. He started treating me like I was a truant schoolboy. 'Stand up! Sit down! Stand up again!' And so the examination began. I knew I wasn't fit for the army. I didn't want to go. I hated it. But they were after me. He said:
"'Take off your glasses!' I removed them. He said:
"'Take off your glasses!' I took them off. He said:
"'What is that letter off there?' Mein Gott! it looked as far off as Pillnitz. It was my left eye out of which I had seen nothing since I was a baby.
"'What is that letter over there?' My God! it looked as far away as Pillnitz. It was my left eye, from which I hadn't seen anything since I was a baby.
"'I see nothing,' I said. He yelled:
"'I see nothing,' I said. He yelled:
"'You can!' Then I said:
"You can!" Then I said:
"'I can't!' Then he roared out:
"'I can't!' Then he yelled:
"'Why can't you?'
"'Why not?'"
[118]"'Because I am blind in it!' He glared at me as if I were a perjurer.
[118]"'Because I can't see out of it!' He stared at me as if I were lying.
"'It is blind and you can see nothing out of it?'
"'Is it blind and you can't see anything out of it?'"
"And now I was getting out of patience with this blockhead. Blind and can't see out of it! They put the blockheads in the army because there is no other place for them. I think that must be the reason why there are more synonyms for blockhead in the German language than in any other—we have the largest army. I said:
"And now I was losing my patience with this idiot. Blind and can't see past it! They put the idiots in the army because there's no other place for them. I think that’s probably why there are more synonyms for idiot in the German language than in any other—we have the largest army. I said:
"'Of course I can't see anything out of it because it's blind, you—— ' I was just on the point of adding 'fool' when I stopped myself in time. It was the military—the august military. One must hold his peace before the magnificent military. He thought I was cheating about my eye because I did not want to march to Moscow, to Paris. And I don't want to march to Moscow or Paris. They're so far.
"'Of course I can't see anything out of it because it's blind, you——' I was just about to add 'fool' when I caught myself in time. It was the military—the esteemed military. One must stay silent in front of the impressive military. He thought I was faking my eye issue because I didn’t want to march to Moscow or Paris. And I really don't want to march to Moscow or Paris. They're so far away."
"So this stupid Kerl took me over to a higher officer and still another. They sat there as stiff and self-complacent as wooden saints in a plaster church. They too shouted at me They were so suspicious, although I had never[119] had the pleasure of meeting any of them before.
"So this idiot Kerl took me over to a higher-ranking officer and another one. They sat there as stiff and self-satisfied as wooden saints in a plaster church. They too yelled at me. They were so suspicious, even though I had never[119] had the pleasure of meeting any of them before."
"'You say you are blind in one eye and can't see out of it?'
"'You say you’re blind in one eye and can’t see out of it?'"
"I screamed, 'No, no, no!' They thought I might be going insane. They examined my eye, my glasses, and tried all kinds of tests to try to fool my poor eye. But it remained my faithful friend, and they were mad. And I was just as mad and ready to shriek at them—'Blind! Blind! Blind!' I was losing half a day for nothing over their stupidities.
"I shouted, 'No, no, no!' They thought I might be losing my mind. They checked my eye, my glasses, and tried all sorts of tests to trick my poor eye. But it stayed loyal to me, and they were frustrated. And I was just as frustrated and ready to yell at them—'Blind! Blind! Blind!' I was wasting half a day for nothing because of their nonsense."
"Then the Dummkopfen began to enter it up on their official blotters. That seemed to take forever too. I was nearly exhausted. They solemnly wrote me down as blind in one eye and cannot see out of it. And at last, Gott sei Dank! they let me go, glowering at me as if they were still sure I was somehow tricking them. And here I am—alive!"
"Then the Dummkopfen started to record it in their official logs. That seemed to take forever too. I was almost exhausted. They seriously noted me down as blind in one eye and unable to see out of it. And finally, thank goodness! they let me go, glaring at me as if they still thought I was somehow pulling a fast one on them. And here I am—alive!"
Friedrich's ludicrous recital, embellished by a hundred gestures and poses, had raised a guffaw even in Villa Elsa.
Friedrich's ridiculous performance, filled with a hundred gestures and poses, had sparked laughter even at Villa Elsa.
CHAPTER XVI
Energetic Musician
GARD discovered that such mockery or berating of military officials, with whom the ordinary public came in servile contact, was rather common in Germany in spite of the universal adoration of the army.
GARD found that making fun of or insulting military officials, whom the average person interacted with in a submissive way, was quite common in Germany despite the widespread admiration for the army.
Intermixed with Friedrich's take-off were his moments of "the grand manner," appropriate to a musical director who is born to command fickle or imperious singers and musicians. He was naturally an actor. His refreshing mimicries amused Gard. Against the bovine background of the Villa Elsa circle, he stood out in relief as an enlivening figure with flitting phases of elegance.
Intermixed with Friedrich's departure were his moments of "the grand manner," fitting for a musical director who is destined to lead unpredictable or demanding singers and musicians. He was naturally an actor. His amusing impersonations entertained Gard. Against the dull backdrop of the Villa Elsa group, he stood out as a vibrant figure, showcasing bursts of elegance.
He was clever, talented. He spun off a lot of new music at the piano, much of it coming from his own pen. Elsa hung absorbed over the wing of the instrument. Friedrich, of[121] about Kirtley's age but adequately equipped and ambitious, was aspiring to some one of the dignified thrones in the musical kingdom of Germany. Gard was only just hatching out as a man. He was essentially but a lad grown up. Von Tielitz showed already a wholly developed maturity. German instruction again versus American education!
He was smart and talented. He created a lot of new music at the piano, much of it from his own imagination. Elsa was completely absorbed, leaning over the side of the instrument. Friedrich, who was about Kirtley's age but equipped and ambitious, was aiming for one of the respected positions in Germany's music scene. Gard was just beginning to develop as a man. He was really just a young guy trying to grow up. Von Tielitz already showed complete maturity. German education versus American education again!
Friedrich was better versed in English than the Bucher children. He paid two calls on Gard that first day. Talking Anglo-Saxon was good practice. On the second call he discharged a missile that struck Kirtley near the heart, and gave him a feeling of faintness.
Friedrich was more fluent in English than the Bucher kids. He made two visits to Gard that first day. Speaking in English was great practice. During the second visit, he fired a comment that hit Kirtley near the heart and left him feeling lightheaded.
"Don't you like Elsa?" Von Tielitz whipped out with no preamble. "She is really a nice girl, a very nice girl. Her family thinks we are to marry. Well, perhaps. I don't know. Sometimes I think yes. Sometimes I think no. There are so many others, don't you know. But I think we will marry as soon as I get my Kapellmeistership. We are always such good friends. She used to sit on my lap before I went away. O! we are very good friends. But now I am not so much in Dresden and, my dear Mr. Kirtley, my poor Kapellmeistership does not come along. It[122] is most aggravating, as you say in English. I get so discouraged."
"Don't you like Elsa?" Von Tielitz asked abruptly. "She's really a nice girl, a very nice girl. Her family thinks we're going to get married. Well, maybe. I don't know. Sometimes I think yes. Sometimes I think no. There are so many others, you know. But I think we will marry as soon as I get my Kapellmeister position. We always get along so well. She used to sit on my lap before I left. Oh! we are really good friends. But now I'm not in Dresden as much, and, my dear Mr. Kirtley, my poor Kapellmeister position isn't coming through. It[122] is really frustrating, as you say in English. I get so discouraged."
He brightened again.
He cheered up again.
"They tell me you and Elsa have been playing duos. Such good training. Very agreeable. We used to play together also. A nice girl to rub one's knees against under the piano—oh,
"They tell me you and Elsa have been playing together in duos. That's great practice. Very nice. We used to play together too. She was a nice girl to lean against under the piano—oh,
"I am Titania the blond,
Titania, of the air!"
"I'm Titania, the blonde,"
"Titania, queen of the sky!"
Friedrich twittered gayly the lines from "Mignon." Then he abruptly changed.
Friedrich cheerfully sang the lines from "Mignon." Then he suddenly shifted.
"But I have now so little time for serious maidens. Ach Himmel! How I am driven by going here and going there! One says this to me, another says that to me, and my head gets all in a whirl."
"But I hardly have any time for serious women anymore. Oh my goodness! I'm so busy running around here and there! Someone tells me this, another person tells me that, and my head is spinning."
So he wandered on with his mixtures of nonchalance, condescension and, above all, his ebullient self-esteem that flowed over on to everyone to the point of deluging them. When he went away, it was with such a warm invitation to call upon him the next week that Kirtley could not but accept. Besides, here was opened up a novel and suggestive line of[123] behavior from the standpoint of the German young man of the world.
So he kept wandering around with his mix of indifference, arrogance, and, more than anything, his overflowing self-confidence that washed over everyone, almost overwhelming them. When he left, he extended such a warm invitation to visit him the following week that Kirtley couldn't help but accept. Plus, this presented a new and intriguing way of[123] behaving from the perspective of a worldly German young man.
Gard was left with confused feelings that drooped their wings in displeasure if not distress. So there was a rival, and of long standing, on the little rosy sea of his romance! And this was he. Was it a wonder that Elsa had "spells"? Here was a true heart-breaker. Just the type to play havoc with a girl. What place was there left for the mild, unpretending Gard? And still she deserved far better than Von Tielitz. Perhaps it was this feeling that added to her unhappiness. His vulgarity! To talk as Von Tielitz did about one who might become his wife, and to a stranger, was a new form of German brutality. It steadied and deepened Gard's admiration for her. Who ever heard a young Yankee speak like this about his serious sweetheart? However raw he may be, there is a certain sacred respect at the bottom of his language about her—his bearing toward her.
Gard was left with mixed feelings that weighed him down in disappointment, if not distress. So there was a rival, and one with a long history, in the small world of his romance! And this was him. Was it any surprise that Elsa had "spells"? Here was a real heartbreaker. Just the kind to wreak havoc on a girl. What chance did the gentle, unassuming Gard have left? And still, she deserved so much better than Von Tielitz. Maybe that feeling was adding to her unhappiness. His crudeness! To speak the way Von Tielitz did about someone who could be his wife, and to a complete stranger, was a new level of German rudeness. It only made Gard's admiration for her stronger. Who ever heard a young American talk like that about his serious girlfriend? No matter how rough he might be, there’s a deep sense of respect in the way he talks about her—his attitude towards her.
Elsa did not appear at meals for a day or two after Friedrich left. Kirtley was not encouraged by learning that this usually happened after a call from the composer. He thought it strange that the Frau, with all her[124] plain speech and hardy lack of sentiment, still made no reference to her daughter's trouble. Marriage is to the Germans such an earth-to-earth affair, as Gard perceived, that he marveled she did not unbosom herself capaciously about what must be a mother's anxiety. But the Teuton daughter is like a glove that can be put on or cast off by the sovereign male. She is meant to be toughened, exposed to rude blasts, fortified, to be able to support the draft-mare burdens of Teuton wifehood.
Elsa didn’t show up for meals for a day or two after Friedrich left. Kirtley wasn’t reassured to find out that this usually happened after a visit from the composer. He found it odd that the Frau, with her straightforward speech and strong lack of sentiment, still didn’t mention her daughter’s troubles. Marriage is such a practical matter for Germans, as Gard noticed, that he wondered why she didn’t openly share what must be a mother’s worry. But the German daughter is like a glove that a powerful man can put on or take off. She is expected to be toughened, exposed to harsh conditions, and strengthened to handle the burdens of German wifehood.
CHAPTER XVII
Immorality and Indecency
GARD now descended unwittingly into one of the darkest regions of German life, and one which foreign publics had persistently missed or voluntarily overlooked in their chorus of approbation of the race.
GARD now unknowingly entered one of the darkest parts of German life, a part that foreign audiences had consistently ignored or chosen to overlook in their praise of the race.
It is a familiar dictum that one can judge of a nation pretty fairly by the position and treatment of its women. Kirtley had never, in America, heard anything about Deutschland in this light. But he soon found in Saxony that this was only one of the numerous German topics on which little publicity was shed in his homeland in spite of the general emphasis laid on German preëminence. This emphasis was mainly a diffusion, through mere books of information, about achievements and an extraordinary condition of learned mentality. Of the actual inhabitants beyond the Rhine, ignorance was kept widespread. Ger[126]man femininity was assumed to be of a predominating excellence to match that of German masculinity.
It’s a well-known saying that you can gauge a country quite accurately by how its women are treated. Kirtley had never heard anything about Germany in this way while in America. But he quickly discovered in Saxony that this was just one of many German issues that received little attention in his home country, despite the general focus on Germany’s superiority. This focus was mostly a distribution of information through books about achievements and an impressive state of educated thinking. Meanwhile, ignorance about the actual people living across the Rhine was widespread. German femininity was thought to be of a high standard, equal to that of German masculinity.
No study of a people is indeed complete without an unglossed inquiry into its conduct toward its women and children. To say that the German's business traits are the same and as reputable as those of other races, is below the mark. In this secular domain he is compelled to deal and to act within the accepted formulæ of trade. To do otherwise would be to ostracize himself.
No study of a culture is truly complete without a straightforward examination of how it treats its women and children. To claim that Germans’ business practices are the same and as respectable as those of other groups is an understatement. In this area, they have to operate within the established norms of commerce. Failing to do so would mean isolating themselves.
But he is in no such competition or is subject to no such exactions in his attitude toward his own women and children. With them he does as he pleases and his real nature stands forth. These truly vital matters have been passed over as if unnoticed by the world, as has been said, and still it wonders why it cannot learn what the German is—does not understand him. He is, perhaps more than anyone, what he is toward his own inferiors—toward those who are weaker and dependent.
But he isn’t competing or facing any pressure when it comes to his own women and children. With them, he does what he wants, and his true nature is revealed. These important issues have been ignored as if they don’t exist, and still, the world wonders why it can’t figure out who the German is—why it doesn’t understand him. He is, perhaps more than anyone else, defined by how he treats those who are weaker and dependent on him.
The question of German womanhood and girlhood should not therefore be blinked by the earnest contemplator. It was not long before Gard was saying to himself that if[127] Americans could be made to realize the status of womankind in Deutschland, they would not be so lured by the idea of sending their young folk thither for education. There would be a marked decline in their generous enthusiasm for all things German. In what civilized land does woman lead less in lofty, sublimated power or put a fainter stamp on the talents of the race? German art, music, poetry, language, politics, education, all are distinctively masculine. The Teuton woman merely partakes of the life of man, the ideal. She does not assume to lead him. She would seem so far below par that, as Gard had seen, even flirtation scarcely exists in Deutschland. Flirtation is particularly a custom among equals.
The question of German womanhood and girlhood shouldn't be ignored by serious thinkers. Gard soon found himself thinking that if[127] Americans understood the status of women in Germany, they wouldn't be so tempted to send their young people there for education. Their enthusiastic support for all things German would drop significantly. In what civilized country do women have less influence in high, idealistic roles or leave a weaker mark on the talents of the culture? German art, music, poetry, language, politics, and education are all distinctly masculine. German women merely share in the lives of men, the ideals. They don't claim to lead. They seem so far behind that, as Gard noticed, even flirting is almost nonexistent in Germany. Flirting is especially a practice among equals.
When he returned Friedrich's visits as promised, he found him sharing the room of his friend Karl Messer. Messer was a successful architect who had already secured a Government commission while the equally youthful Kirtley—may it be repeated—had not begun real life and, according to the American plan, could do nothing very well. Those two room-mates and cronies were leading the typical Teuton existence of youths who combined proficient work with a frank sensuality accom[128]panied, of course, by much imbibing in the German way. And it may be preliminarily noted that what explorations Gard afterward made in this great and seamy side of Teuton nature, likewise ended in a downward direction toward depths that he had scarcely thought possible in the educated human.
When he returned Friedrich's visits as promised, he found him sharing a room with his friend Karl Messer. Messer was a successful architect who had already landed a government contract, while the equally young Kirtley—let it be said again—had not started real life and, following the American model, couldn’t really excel at anything. The two roommates and buddies were living the typical German lifestyle of young men who mixed hard work with open enjoyment of life, which, of course, included plenty of drinking in the German style. It should also be noted that the explorations Gard later undertook into this complex and sometimes dark side of German nature ultimately led him to depths he hardly thought possible in educated individuals.
Von Tielitz and Messer had been at an uproarious ball the night before and were idling about, recuperating. They had accomplished the ruin there of two girls, which they looked upon as truly manly sport. Assuming that Kirtley, as must be the case with all young men, was equally interested with them in being satyrs, they lost no time in trying to entertain him with their adventures.
Von Tielitz and Messer had been partying hard the night before and were lounging around, recovering. They had completely wrecked the lives of two girls, which they saw as a true testament to their masculinity. Believing that Kirtley, like all young men, was just as into being reckless as they were, they quickly started sharing their wild stories to entertain him.
The pursuit of woman! In Germany this is not very difficult, as she is not visibly unhappy to consider herself the legitimate prey of the lordly sex. This idea runs naturally and powerfully throughout the Teuton scheme. It is not merely that the female is considered to have a price, but the price must be low, if not a cypher. To German women the triumphant male is a splendid creature. His acts are noble. To be hungry, thirsty, sensual are proper, and therefore candid, attri[129]butes in man. In order to subdue the earth, the race must be prolific, and to be prolific, desires must not be limited or weakened by pale Puritanisms. That men are normally uncleansed sewers from which the face need not be averted, was a conception Kirtley's senses had fallen somewhat foul of in the Bucher home. To what point this aspect was carried logically outside Villa Elsa, he was to realize in skirting the openly sensual sides.
The pursuit of women! In Germany, this isn’t very difficult, as women don’t seem unhappy to view themselves as the rightful targets of men. This idea flows naturally and powerfully throughout German culture. It’s not just that women are seen as having a value; that value is expected to be low, if not non-existent. To German women, a successful man is a wonderful figure. His actions are noble. Being hungry, thirsty, and sensual are seen as normal, and thus genuine, traits in men. To conquer the land, the population must thrive, and for that to happen, desires must not be restricted or weakened by faint-hearted beliefs. The notion that men are generally seen as unrefined creatures not worthy of attention was something Kirtley had started to grapple with in the Bucher household. Just how far this view was taken outside Villa Elsa, he was about to understand as he navigated the more openly sensual aspects.
The two Germans told of the various girls who had lived with them when in college. For the frank amatory life of the Teuton student begins early. Von Tielitz and Messer also boasted of their present-day mistresses who were so often changed for reasons of economy. The hilarious game, as Gard learned, was to obtain favors in exchange for nothing as far as possible. Trickery, lies, abuse, kicks, were employed to this purpose. Female chastity? A fable for the impotent. Consequently all was fair.
The two Germans talked about the different girls who had been with them during their college days. The open romantic life of the German student starts early. Von Tielitz and Messer also bragged about their current girlfriends, who were frequently swapped out for financial reasons. The fun game, as Gard discovered, was to get favors in return for as little as possible. Deception, lies, mistreatment, and physical force were used to achieve this. Female purity? A myth for the powerless. So, everything was fair game.
Sisters of their respected fellows were inferentially appraised and colloquially "hefted" as articles of social commerce ready to be knocked off matrimonially to the best bidder under the material rules of the German Mitgift[130] system. Through the garish films of innuendo and braggadocio that day Kirtley was led to behold images of these daughters as if they were languishing to become mates and beating their breasts in their longing to become mothers. He had by no means now forgotten Friedrich's equivocal remarks about Elsa.
Sisters of their respected peers were subtly judged and informally "weighed" as items of social currency, ready to be married off to the highest bidder according to the material rules of the German Mitgift[130] system. Through the over-the-top images of innuendo and boasting that day, Kirtley was made to see these young women as if they were yearning to become partners and were lamenting their desire to become mothers. He certainly hadn’t forgotten Friedrich's ambiguous comments about Elsa.
Before Gard was to leave Deutschland he had to conclude that the German puts himself in the attitude of thinking of his women as sluttish and accordingly acting in that scale toward them. There is no great gilding to these fancies. Girls are small inspiration to him compared with what the petites dames are to the amorous Frenchman. Idealization of love in its ultimate fulfillment, the poetizing of the ardent flesh crying out for its craving mate, are characteristically ignored by the Teuton who seeks the baser gratifications without illuminations of loveliness or hesitations of delicate refinement.
Before Gard was set to leave Germany, he had to conclude that Germans tend to view their women as promiscuous and, accordingly, treat them as such. There's no great embellishment to these beliefs. Girls inspire him very little compared to how the petites dames inspire the romantic Frenchman. The idealization of love in its highest form, the poetry of passionate desire longing for its match, is typically overlooked by the German, who pursues more basic pleasures without any hints of beauty or moments of subtle refinement.
Kirtley thought he knew young men, yet this revolting capacity in them in Germany was proven to him to be not unnormal by its openness and by the dearth of any loud voices in rebuke. The German is conspicuously full[131] of animal spirits. He affects the mighty in physique. Exudations and emanations are frank and prominent functions.
Kirtley thought he understood young men, yet this shocking trait in them in Germany showed him that it was not unusual because of its openness and the lack of any strong voices of criticism. Germans are clearly full[131] of vitality. They display strength in their physique. Their expressions and emotions are direct and noticeable.
Under the Kaiser the Berlin dame who rented rooms to the foreign student, offering them "with" or "without," meaning sometimes her own daughter in the bargain, considered herself respectable enough. More than this she acted in line with what appeared to be the purpose of acquiring a sympathetic control of the morals as well as the minds of the alien sojourner, the one being accompanied by a pandering to his lower nature with the doors of vice flagrantly ajar while the other armed his mentality with a Teutonized equipment and outlook. To sap the will, to galvanize the mind as from a German electric battery, palsied resistance to aggressive Germania. It was of a piece with that propaganda which the world was not to wake up to until almost too late.
Under the Kaiser, the woman in Berlin who rented rooms to foreign students, offering them "with" or "without," sometimes including her own daughter in the deal, considered herself pretty respectable. More than that, she acted in a way that seemed aimed at controlling both the morals and the minds of the foreign visitors—one side catering to their base desires with the doors to vice wide open, while the other equipped their minds with a German perspective and attitude. It was about breaking their will and energizing their minds like a German electric battery, leaving them unable to resist aggressive German influence. This was all part of a propaganda effort that the world wouldn’t recognize until it was almost too late.
These downright animal phases pointed the way logically, in Gard's mind, to that obscenity which is interwoven in the German civilization. He had first come across such evidence in leading comic journals. The drawings and jests that did not leave much[132] to be filled out, adorned many a German page with an Adamic candor. It divorced him from Simplicissimus and Ulk, not that he was squeamish or a Miss Priscilla, but he saw no fun in that sort of thing.
These blatant animalistic phases logically led Gard to see the disturbing aspects woven into German culture. He first encountered such evidence in prominent comic magazines. The illustrations and jokes that left little to the imagination filled many German pages with an innocent boldness. It made him lose interest in Simplicissimus and Ulk, not because he was sensitive or prim, but because he found no enjoyment in that kind of humor.
He talked of it later with Anderson. Though there were pleasant delusions in Anderson's mind about Germany before he arrived, it was not his fault if few seemed to be left after his seven years. He bluntly defined the limited German wit and humor as characteristically born of the latrine.
He later discussed it with Anderson. Although Anderson had some nice misconceptions about Germany before he got there, it wasn’t his fault that so few remained after his seven years. He frankly described the limited German wit and humor as being typically rooted in the latrine.
Gard's two young friends did not refrain from talk in the key of indecency. Their complacent revelation of the extent to which the pornographic enters into the German scene, suggested an unclosed Priapean volume whose companion in America is as a sealed book. Kirtley heard that stores filled with obscene objects publicly for sale were to be found on frequented thoroughfares in German cities.
Gard's two young friends didn't hold back on their indecent conversations. Their casual disclosure about how much pornographic material is present in Germany implied an open secret that remains hidden in America. Kirtley heard that shops selling explicit items openly could be found on busy streets in German cities.
He saw that Frau Bucher's insistence on a chaperone, which he had regarded a silly, outworn conventionality, appeared most wise. Germany was a poor place for an unguarded German girl.
He realized that Frau Bucher's insistence on having a chaperone, which he had thought was a silly, outdated convention, actually seemed very sensible. Germany was not a safe place for an unprotected German girl.
This ran through his mind:
This crossed his mind:
[133]"Great Guns! What a country for me to study for the ministry, study morality, best fit myself for life, as advised by Rebner and, it seems—everybody!"
[133] "Wow! What a great country for me to prepare for the ministry, to learn about morality, and to get ready for life, just like Rebner suggested and, it looks like—everyone else!"
CHAPTER XVIII
The Naked Movement
THE German, in all this physical aspect, is not a little like an unabashed ape. Accordingly the foreigner in Deutschland is impressed by the popular worship of the wide-hipped female. The Teuton can leave little to be inferred but that he is more interested in the magnet of her developed hips than in the magic of her brain.
THE German, in all this physical aspect, resembles an unapologetic ape quite a bit. Thus, the foreigner in Germany is struck by the widespread admiration for the wide-hipped woman. The German seems to signal that he cares more about the appeal of her curvy figure than the allure of her intellect.
American women, with their slender waists and chaste frigidness born of Plymouth Rock, with their rulership in the home, their influence permeating conspicuously in matters of public interest out of the home, their entire freedom to be courted and married or let alone in unbounded respect—how long would these conditions have been permitted by the Gothic Kaiser if heedless America had fallen into his gradually tightening grip? Doubtless to his view Yankee women were treated too much[135] like dolls. They are not breeders of soldiers, makers of kingdoms. They do not rear children for the State. What have they desirably in common with the disciplined Hausfrau who becomes the mother of the ruling future generations? She is properly the chattel of the Government.
American women, with their slim waists and reserved demeanor rooted in Plymouth Rock, ruling their households and having a noticeable impact on public matters outside the home, enjoying complete freedom to be courted, married, or remain single with full respect—how long would these conditions have lasted under the Gothic Kaiser if careless America had fallen into his increasingly tight grip? Surely he thought that Yankee women were treated too much like dolls. They aren't soldiers, nor do they create kingdoms. They don't raise children for the State. What do they really share with the disciplined Hausfrau who becomes the mother of future leaders? She is rightfully considered the property of the Government.
And so it is not enough, as Gard recognized, for Frau or Fräulein to be massive of line and fond of being upholstered in dense colors in order to satisfy the general grossness of her male. It is not enough that she should be armed with strong hands, planted on large feet, and decorated in the German's favorite rococo manner of abounding breasts, to gratify his cyclopean aspirations.
And so, as Gard pointed out, it's not enough for a woman to have a curvy figure and love wearing deep colors to meet the basic desires of men. It's not sufficient for her to have strong hands, big feet, and be dressed in the German's preferred rococo style of emphasizing her curves to satisfy his giant expectations.
"Big hips mean big women and big women mean big empires." The sex fecund, ardent for mating and offspring, is the type. And thus fatness, which obviously and indisputably fills out the picture, is a popular German female attribute. Von Tielitz and Messer made it plain that obesity and width of girth characterized the transient objects of their amours. And their allusions gave every evidence that the famous Naked Cult, to the fascinations of which Fräulein Wasserhaus, with her bared[136] and redundant bosom, was yielding, had been claiming the German youth for its own.
"Big hips mean big women, and big women mean big empires." The sexually active and eager for mating and children is the idea. Thus, fatness, which clearly fills out the image, is a popular German female trait. Von Tielitz and Messer made it clear that obesity and a wide build characterized the temporary objects of their affections. Their hints strongly suggested that the famous Naked Cult, to which Fräulein Wasserhaus, with her exposed[136] and ample bosom, was succumbing, had been attracting the German youth to its allure.
Germany was recovering from this rage for nudity which had assumed some proportions. Starting from the only artistic section of the Empire, namely Bavaria, this cult had knocked even against the gloomy portals of the Pommeranian churches in the north. The Teuton had suddenly discovered that it was right and proper in his godship, as it was in the realm of the Greek deities, to go about naked. It was natural, healthful, and both beautiful and moral.
Germany was recovering from this obsession with nudity that had gotten a bit out of control. Beginning in Bavaria, the only artistic part of the Empire, this trend had even reached the somber doors of the Pommeranian churches in the north. The Germans suddenly realized that it was appropriate and acceptable for them, just like it was with the Greek gods, to go around without clothes. It felt natural, healthy, and both beautiful and moral.
German men and women, in their divinity, should bathe, drink beer, dance together nude. What else did Grecian sculpture teach to these the modern Greeks—the true legatees of all that was Hellenic? What else did painting inculcate but the beauty of undraped couples wandering through landscapes? What more majestic spectacle than that of the Teuton father, mother and children going out for an afternoon promenade, clothed only in the ingenuous consciousness of their human greatness?
German men and women, in their divine essence, should bathe, drink beer, and dance together naked. What else did Grecian sculpture teach these modern Greeks—the true heirs of everything Hellenic? What else did painting emphasize but the beauty of undraped couples strolling through landscapes? What could be more majestic than a German father, mother, and children enjoying an afternoon walk, clad only in the innocent awareness of their human greatness?
In a race of beings so little modeled after the accepted lines of pulchritude, all this was[137] laughable. But to the German, condemned to a vise-like seriousness and to childlikeness, it became significant and weighty. It was such a grateful revelation not to have to dream of his loved ones through the unsatisfactory medium of German clothing.
In a race of beings so little modeled after the accepted standards of beauty, all this was[137] amusing. But to the German, trapped in a tight grip of seriousness and childlikeness, it became meaningful and important. It was such a refreshing change not to have to envision his loved ones through the disappointing filter of German clothing.
With his customary excess of logic he plunged headlong into these ardent waves of the realm of Venus rising unimpeachably from the sea in her immortal bareness. He began to systematize this demonstration. Some of the political parties seemed to be in line to favor this revealment of another radical tenet. German philosophers made ready to seize upon it with huge mental biceps and labor to incorporate it beneficently into the Teuton pansophy. Even doctors of theology were said to view the novel dispensation through the blue spectacles of their didacticism, and to hesitate and stumble over the question of greeting these glad visions of a glad apocalypse. What was truer Protestantism than that there is the natural body as well as the spiritual body, and that it would be virtuous to behold outwardly the former as it was virtuous to recognize inwardly the latter?
With his usual enthusiasm for logic, he dove straight into the passionate waves of the world of love, rising undeniably from the sea in her eternal nudity. He started to organize this demonstration. Some political parties appeared to support this unveiling of another radical idea. German philosophers prepared to embrace it with great mental strength and work to integrate it positively into German philosophy. Even theologians reportedly looked at this new perspective through the colored lens of their teachings, hesitating and stumbling over the idea of welcoming these joyful visions of a happy ending. Wasn’t true Protestantism the belief that there is both a physical body and a spiritual body, and that it is virtuous to see the former outwardly just as it is virtuous to acknowledge the latter inwardly?
The campaign became almost lively. Of[138] course the young Germans, whose fathers and mothers in their youth had raved over Wagner and thus shocked their elders, raved over a departure that linked such possibilities of frankness and loveliness so delectably together. The Von Tielitzes and Messers were in the seventh heaven.
The campaign became almost vibrant. Of[138] course the young Germans, whose parents had once gone wild for Wagner in their youth and shocked their elders, were excited about a change that combined such opportunities for honesty and beauty so delightfully. The Von Tielitzes and Messers were on cloud nine.
But Germany, being a northern country ruled severely in the main by old men, was bound to feel in the end more comfortable in clothes. Climate governs male and female alike and shapes their habits to its own tyrannical mandates. The Teutons were doomed to suggest flannel. So a vast moral revulsion in the form of the much German clothedness finally rose up and overwhelmed the religion of Nudity—the Nackt Kultur. Although the Teuton male likes to contemplate himself and be contemplated as candid Mother Nature made him, he could not adapt himself to the idea of his fleshy women appearing naked before a critical and commenting world. Momus had at last arrived in ancient Deutschland and was feared.
But Germany, being a northern country mostly run by older men, was eventually going to feel more comfortable in clothes. Climate affects everyone and shapes their behaviors according to its strict demands. The Germans were destined to evoke flannel. So a strong moral reaction in the form of the typical German way of dressing finally emerged and took over the ideology of Nudity—the Nackt Kultur. While German men like to admire themselves and have others admire them as Nature intended, they couldn’t accept the idea of their curvy women appearing naked in front of a critical and judgmental world. Momus had finally come to ancient Germany, and he was feared.
While the movement, which was presuming to cover Germany with sculptures of its heroes in complete undress, honored itself by such[139] fitting testimonials to their lordliness, Fritz curiously shrank before public statues depicting his fat housewife in like absence of attire. This was illogical besides being unsatisfactory to those who had insisted on worshipping the German female form al fresco. The vital point being thus dodged, there was left nothing interesting in the way of legs for the Naked Cult to stand on, and it dropped out of sight as suddenly as it had risen to view. Prejudice is Plebeian and blind and to the blind and Plebeian high art of course goes with low morals. The Plebs are always in the crushing majority. So the odd German mind jumped to the other extreme and for a few months got ashamed of little daughters going barefoot or playing with naked animal toys.
While the movement, which aimed to cover Germany with sculptures of its heroes in the nude, took pride in such [139] fitting tributes to their nobility, Fritz was oddly uncomfortable with public statues depicting his overweight wife in a similar lack of clothing. This was not only illogical but also dissatisfying to those who had insisted on celebrating the German female form al fresco. With this crucial point being overlooked, there was nothing substantial for the Naked Cult to stand on, and it vanished as quickly as it had appeared. Prejudice is common and blind, and to those who are blind and ordinary, high art naturally aligns with low morals. The masses are always in the overwhelming majority. Thus, the peculiar German mindset swung to the other extreme, and for a few months, there was shame associated with little girls going barefoot or playing with naked animal toys.
Gard had been able to warm up small sympathy for the modern military authors and iron and blood philosophers whom he found in vogue in Germany. On the other hand, cold water had unexpectedly been thrown on the retreating Goethes and Schillers whom he had come to venerate with grammar and lexicon. As the Germans were proving to be wide of what his anticipations had set as a mark, he[140] had begun a serious course of reading not only about the modern race but about its origins, curious to know of the early developments of this strange people who belonged to civilization yet was so considerably and constitutionally outside the realm of its Christian development.
Gard had managed to develop a bit of sympathy for the modern military writers and iron-and-blood philosophers that were popular in Germany. However, he was unexpectedly discouraged by the fading figures of Goethe and Schiller, whom he had come to admire through grammar and vocabulary. As the Germans were turning out to be far from what he had hoped, he[140] started a serious reading journey not just about the modern era but also about its origins, eager to learn about the early developments of this peculiar people who belonged to civilization yet were significantly and fundamentally outside the scope of its Christian evolution.
In this study he became attracted to Charlemagne and that epoch. Of them he had learned little at college. Of course the Germans had "bagged" Charlemagne, as an Englishman would express it, in addition to their other seizures right and left in the face of an indulgent, even supine, world. But Gard discovered that while they had kept the puissant Carolingian snatched to their breasts, the chivalrous side of the great medieval evolution which ended in fostering the romantic ideal of womanhood in its chastity, daintiness and colorful spell, had never reached much east of his capital—Aix-la-Chapelle. His heroic size, his practical religious pretensions and assumptions, his campaigns to seize control of foreign lands—all such Carolingian features and manifestations were imitated and adopted as German motifs, but the corresponding gallant exaltation of the gentler sex was not included.[141] The polished courts of self-denying love, the Troubadours, the salons, the refining influences that gradually raised woman to her modern sovereignty of a graceful liberty and charm, never characterized Deutschland.
In this study, he became interested in Charlemagne and that era. He hadn't learned much about them in college. Of course, the Germans had claimed Charlemagne, as an Englishman might put it, along with their other acquisitions that occurred in the face of a complacent and even passive world. However, Gard discovered that while they had embraced the powerful Carolingian figure, the chivalrous aspect of the great medieval evolution, which eventually helped create the romantic ideal of womanhood characterized by chastity, delicacy, and charm, had rarely made its way east of his capital—Aix-la-Chapelle. His larger-than-life persona, his practical religious motivations and beliefs, his military campaigns for foreign territory—all these Carolingian traits were adopted as German motifs, but the corresponding noble celebration of women was left out. The refined courts of selfless love, the Troubadours, the salons, and the cultural influences that gradually elevated women to their modern status of graceful freedom and appeal never defined Deutschland.[141]
Besides, women becoming idols through his own sexual restraint compelled a self-sacrificing procedure that did not appeal to Fritz. To him those many feminizing influences had naught to do with strength in battle or in toil. They were dangerous, softening, and coddled the elements of defeat. He wanted work and fighting and children, always children, but with the lustful appetites of the undisputed male.
Besides, women turning into symbols of purity through his own sexual restraint forced a self-sacrificing process that didn't attract Fritz. To him, those numerous feminizing influences had nothing to do with strength in battle or hard work. They were risky, weakening, and nurtured the traits of defeat. He wanted labor and conflict and children, always children, but with the passionate desires of the unquestioned male.
His Berthas and Gretchens, who had been exceptional figures in the warring camps of the ancient Teutons, were therefore only transferred into a similar yet menial relation in the housed home. And there they have typically remained—in its cook room and nursery. The fact that the Buchers, though coming, as they boasted, from one original, unmixed, stationary stock there in that middle spot of old Europe, had displayed themselves as social and political parvenus, led to Kirtley's reflecting:
His Berthas and Gretchens, who had been remarkable figures in the battling camps of the ancient Teutons, were then placed in a similar but less significant role in the household. And they have mostly stayed there—in the kitchen and the nursery. The fact that the Buchers, despite claiming to come from one pure, unchanging, stationary lineage in that central part of old Europe, had shown themselves to be social and political newcomers, made Kirtley reflect:
[142]"The German thinks of a wife as in the kitchen, while a wife appears to the Frenchman as in the salon, to the Briton, as in an English garden."
[142]"The German sees a wife as someone in the kitchen, while the Frenchman sees a wife as someone in the living room, and the Briton sees a wife as someone in an English garden."
So this gradual elevating of the sex toward an ethereal height in all respects, toward pure associations which, through the epochs of chaste saints, chivalry, gallantry, social freedom, were to uplift men by the graces of lofty feminine enchantment, took place westward of the Rhine. And Germany, if the sporadic Heine is excepted, had no Shelleys, no Chopins, and scarcely any of that rare, delightful perfume of human existence which western and southern mankind quite typically adores as the ultimate extract of beauty because it is associated with the spiritual elegance of womanhood....
So, this gradual elevation of sex to a higher, more ethereal level in every way—toward pure connections that, throughout the ages of virtuous saints, chivalry, gallantry, and social freedom, aimed to uplift men through the charms of elevated feminine allure—happened to the west of the Rhine. And Germany, aside from the occasional Heine, had no Shelleys, no Chopins, and hardly any of that rare, delightful essence of human existence that people in the west and south typically cherish as the pinnacle of beauty because it’s linked to the spiritual grace of womanhood...
On Kirtley's leaving that day, Von Tielitz and Messer showed themselves generously ready to share their amorous acquaintanceship. They insisted on his going with them sometime to the smallest, quaintest inn in Dresden where they were at present cultivating friendly relations with "Fritzi." In short petticoats she served the best hot sausages in[143] Saxony. To an American student of life and language in Germany she was pictured as absolutely necessary. For, although originally from the Thuringian forest, she spoke the Saxon dialect "shockingly well."
On Kirtley's departure that day, Von Tielitz and Messer were more than eager to share their romantic experiences. They insisted he join them soon at the smallest, quirkiest inn in Dresden, where they were currently building a friendly rapport with "Fritzi." In her short skirts, she served the best hot sausages in[143] Saxony. For an American student exploring life and language in Germany, she was considered absolutely essential. Although she originally came from the Thuringian forest, she spoke the Saxon dialect "shockingly well."
Kirtley laughed it off as a part of the ribald fun.
Kirtley laughed it off as part of the raunchy fun.
The young Germans wound up their list of salutations with Der Tag!
The young Germans finished their list of greetings with Der Tag!
"What do you mean by Der Tag?" he inquired. The others grinned significantly.
"What do you mean by Der Tag?" he asked. The others smiled knowingly.
"Wait and see. It will be something kolossal." And they called out after him:
"Wait and see. It will be something colossal." And they shouted after him:
"Don't forget about Fritzi!"
"Don't forget Fritzi!"
That night Gard, laden with heavy feelings, tumbled into his German bed piled with its equatorial bolsters. Could Elsa marry a man like Friedrich? Ought she to be permitted to? Could she really love him? Wouldn't she be horrified if she knew fully about him? Or would she, like German women in general, seem to care little about the morals of her future mate? Likely, as Gard fancied, it was this knowledge of him that sent her now and then in evident unhappiness to her room.
That night, Gard, weighed down by heavy emotions, fell into his German bed, which was piled high with tropical pillows. Could Elsa really marry a guy like Friedrich? Should she be allowed to? Could she actually love him? Wouldn't she be shocked if she knew everything about him? Or would she, like many German women, seem to care very little about the morals of her future partner? Most likely, as Gard imagined, it was this awareness of him that occasionally drove her to her room in visible distress.
She was a pure and very worth-while girl.[144] He could not ignore that her healthful, productive example was a stimulus to him. It would be a sturdy prop in his long sensitive, susceptible physical recovery—and afterward. Was it really not a kind of duty to try to save her from sharing the fate of Von Tielitz, and win her if he could?
She was a genuinely good girl.[144] He couldn’t overlook how her healthy, inspiring example motivated him. It would be a strong support during his long, delicate recovery—and beyond. Wasn’t it really a kind of duty to try to save her from ending up like Von Tielitz, and to win her over if possible?
CHAPTER XIX
Jim Deming from Erie, PA.
THE Americanization of the Bucher home Kirtley naturally thought beyond all attempts. Its detestation of the low-born Yankee, with only his sorry millions, seemed too deeply planted there, especially in the brain and bosom of the Frau. Could Villa Elsa have been transferred to the United States, such a viewpoint might perhaps have been altered after a time. But this representative boorish German family, stuck here on the rainy banks of the mid-continent Elbe and so rooted and clamorous in the presumption that they and their kind were eclipsing the earth—how impossible of any conversion?
THE Americanization of the Bucher home was something Kirtley naturally thought was beyond any attempts. Their disdain for the lowly Yankees, with only their pathetic wealth, seemed deeply ingrained, especially in the mind and heart of the Frau. If Villa Elsa could have been moved to the United States, maybe their perspective would have changed over time. But this typical, rude German family, stuck here on the rainy banks of the mid-continent Elbe, so convinced and loud about the idea that they and their kind were dominating the world—how could they ever change?
Gard had at first the idea of getting together some American statistics and showing the Buchers a few facts. Then he saw this was hopeless. They accepted nothing that did not come through their own official channels. And[146] why should he waste time on these obscure people? Why should he undertake to upset their racial happiness? Nobody, least of all he, could change their attitude about the upstart Yankee and his upstart dollars. The Buchers held themselves too far above mere money and its filth.
Gard initially thought about gathering some American statistics to present a few facts to the Buchers. Then he realized that was pointless. They wouldn't accept anything unless it came through their own official sources. And[146] why should he waste his time on these obscure people? Why should he try to disturb their sense of racial superiority? Nobody, especially not him, could change their view of the arrogant American and his so-called wealth. The Buchers considered themselves way above mere money and its dirtiness.
But the miracle was, nevertheless, to be accomplished, at least for awhile, in a manner as simple as it was unlooked for. And this was what happened.
But the miracle was, however, to be achieved, at least for a while, in a way as simple as it was unexpected. And this is what happened.
One day, soon after Gard's disillusioning call on Von Tielitz, he was grubbing in his attic among the ninth century roots of the future super-luxuriant Teuton forest, when he heard Tekla's woodchopper feet pounding their way upstairs. A card was thrust in. James Alexander Deming, Erie, Pa. Well, of all the world! The next moment he was there in the room, talkative, airy, sunny, dressed with the obvious American consciousness of having just left the hands of his fashionable tailor and haberdasher. Every section of his black hair and tiny black mustache was plastered down as always in correct position.
One day, not long after Gard's disappointing visit to Von Tielitz, he was digging around in his attic among the roots of what would become a luxurious German forest when he heard Tekla's footsteps pounding up the stairs. A card was shoved in. James Alexander Deming, Erie, Pa. Well, what a surprise! The next moment, he was in the room, chatty, lively, and dressed with that distinct American flair that comes from just having left a trendy tailor and haberdasher. Every part of his black hair and tiny black mustache was slicked down perfectly as usual.
Making himself right at home with his newly acquired cosmopolitanism, Jim ex[147]plained how he was already settled in Dresden for the winter.
Making himself comfortable with his new cosmopolitan lifestyle, Jim ex[147]plained how he was already settled in Dresden for the winter.
"You knew that the more I saw of this old Germany, the more I liked it. My governor wrote me I could stay if I would try to learn something and I thought of you. I said to myself, 'Kirtley is a serious sort of chap. If I light down near him, it will be easier to learn this confounded language they have got over here, and I will be able to shine with it in Erie, Pay, and do the old folks proud.'
"You knew that the more I explored this old Germany, the more I liked it. My dad told me I could stay if I made an effort to learn something, and I thought of you. I said to myself, ‘Kirtley is a serious guy. If I settle down near him, it will be easier to pick up this frustrating language they have over here, and I’ll be able to impress everyone back home in Erie and make my family proud.’"
"So I've got a teacher and a grammar and also a dictionary so big I can't find anything in it—all ready to loop the loop. But first, of course, I must run out and see you and see how you are getting on, swimming in beer. Nothing is too good for us Americans, you know, so my room in the hotel is right by the royal palace where I can see the Crown Prince with his sword fall off his horse every morning at ten. Gad, won't it be something to talk about when I get back to good old Pennsylwanee?"
"So I have a teacher, a grammar book, and a dictionary that's so big I can’t find anything in it—all set to go. But first, of course, I need to run out and see you and check how you’re doing, swimming in beer. Nothing is too good for us Americans, you know, so my hotel room is right next to the royal palace where I can see the Crown Prince with his sword fall off his horse every morning at ten. Gosh, it’s going to be something to talk about when I get back to good old Pennsylvania!"
Deming's "old man" was possessed of wealth derived from oil wells. But although Jim's pockets had always been stuffed with money, he had never been able to get through[148] high school or enter college. Hang it all, he didn't take to books like Kirtley and all such intellectual boys. It was the fault of his dad and mam. They had petted and spoiled him—an only child. It was too bad, but shucks, he wasn't going to let it interfere with his happiness. So it was money here and money there, and a host of friends who, like Gard, could not help being fond of him.
Deming's "old man" had wealth from oil wells. But even though Jim's pockets were always full of cash, he had never managed to finish high school or get into college. He just didn't have a passion for books like Kirtley and those other smart kids. It was his parents’ fault. They pampered and spoiled him—being their only child. It was unfortunate, but he wasn't going to let that affect his happiness. So there was money here and money there, and a lot of friends who, like Gard, couldn't help but be fond of him.
Jim had seen the Kaiser and quaffed out of the largest hogshead on the Rhine. He had been at a duel at Heidelberg where the chap with a cut through his cheek asked for a mug of beer and blew the beer out through the gash. He had swum in Lake Starnberg where Ludwig II had drowned himself; had seen the café in Munich where the celebrated Naked Culture was said to have originated; had bribed his way into the villa at Mayerling where Rudolph of Austria and Marie had ended that mysterious night of fatality. In short, he had done Germany pretty thoroughly.
Jim had met the Kaiser and drank from the biggest barrel on the Rhine. He had been in a duel at Heidelberg where the guy with a cut on his cheek asked for a mug of beer and blew the beer out through the wound. He had swum in Lake Starnberg, where Ludwig II drowned; seen the café in Munich where the famous Naked Culture supposedly started; and bribed his way into the villa at Mayerling, where Rudolph of Austria and Marie met their tragic fate that night. In short, he had explored Germany pretty thoroughly.
When, by his insistent questionings, he learned about the comfortable and illuminating German home where Kirtley had installed himself, and that there was a fine, serious[149] young lady in it with a harvest of straw-colored hair, he soon confessed, after all, to his disappointments.
When he kept asking questions, he found out about the nice and bright German home where Kirtley had settled in, and that there was a great, serious[149] young woman there with a bunch of straw-colored hair. He quickly admitted, after all, that he was disappointed.
"Kirtley, you are always a lucky dog. Here you are with nice Dutch people, in the social swim, absorbing German to beat the band. All I see is chambermaids who shout at me some kind of devilish dialect that a fellow can't understand. And my chambermaid and I are just at present at outs. I told her this morning she was the tallest woman I ever saw. A little of her went such a long ways. As she don't know any English words, that is the only thing we have agreed about. She said, Ja wohl! This going to balls and cafés as I'm doing is all right for local color and all that, but it would tickle dad a lot if I knew a quiet, decent, respectable German family. And I want to know a nice, sober German girl who has got yellow, chorus-girl hair and will steady a fellow down. The proper study of young man is young woman. I haven't been able to meet any young ladies in this country. Sometimes I think they have only wenches. And I want some of the classic Gayty and Schiller stuff too that you can get here in Loschwitz."
"Kirtley, you're always so lucky. Here you are with nice Dutch people, socializing and picking up German like a pro. All I see are chambermaids who yell at me in some weird dialect that I can't make sense of. And my chambermaid and I are currently not getting along. I told her this morning that she was the tallest woman I've ever seen. A little bit of her goes a long way. Since she doesn't know any English, that's the only thing we agree on. She just said, 'Ja wohl!' This going to balls and cafés that I'm doing is great for the local vibe and all that, but it would really please Dad if I could meet a nice, decent German family. And I want to meet a nice, sensible German girl with blonde, chorus-girl hair who can help ground me. The right focus for a young man is a young woman. I haven't been able to meet any young ladies in this country. Sometimes I think they only have maids around here. And I want some of that classic Goethe and Schiller stuff too that you can find here in Loschwitz."
This urgent idea did not appear auspicious[150] to Gard. If Deming got the run of Villa Elsa, he would unsettle things, interfere with his own work. Jim was a good boy but he played hob with study. And he was just the kind of flashy, ignorant Yankee who would prove to Villa Elsa what it claimed about the race. He would disgust the Buchers with his showy superficiality and dolessness. Mere money, everlasting money. More than all he would complicate the situation with Fräulein. He might upset her somehow, and at least discover his own secret feelings toward her—feelings that had become more distraught after the Von Tielitz revelation. In a word, everything would be helter-skelter.
This urgent idea didn’t seem promising[150] to Gard. If Deming got to hang out at Villa Elsa, he would shake things up, mess with his own work. Jim was a good kid but he found it hard to focus on studying. And he was exactly the kind of flashy, clueless guy who would prove Villa Elsa right about what it said regarding their race. He would annoy the Buchers with his flashy superficiality and laziness. Just more money, endless money. Above all, he would complicate things with Fräulein. He might upset her in some way and at least uncover his own secret feelings for her—feelings that had become more troubled after the Von Tielitz revelation. In a nutshell, everything would be chaotic.
After Jim had called twice, bent upon becoming intimate with the Buchers, Gard, as he thought, conceived a clever maneuver. He took Deming over to call on Fräulein Wasserhaus. Here was an earnest young woman, lolling on the gate with plenty of time on her hands, dying for a man. She could teach Deming everything he wanted to know. She was not antagonistic to Americans as were the Buchers. On the contrary she was aching to clasp some one of them in her pudgy arms.
After Jim had called twice, eager to get closer to the Buchers, Gard came up with a clever plan. He took Deming to visit Fräulein Wasserhaus. She was a serious young woman, lounging at the gate with plenty of free time, longing for a man. She could teach Deming everything he needed to know. She wasn’t hostile to Americans like the Buchers were. In fact, she was desperate to wrap her chubby arms around one of them.
But this stratagem proved a flat failure.[151] When they came away from her abode, Jim took on a worried look and lit a cigarette.
But this plan turned out to be a complete failure.[151] As they left her place, Jim looked anxious and lit a cigarette.
"Say, see here, old chap. Are you trying to make fun of me? Is this a joke? I don't want a walrus, thirty years old, with ragbag clothes that fit her a foot off. She has a gait like an ice wagon. Why, she couldn't get a job as window-washer in the street car shops of Erie, Pay."
"Hey, look here, buddy. Are you messing with me? Is this some kind of joke? I don't want a thirty-year-old walrus wearing raggedy clothes that are a foot too big. She walks like a clunky old cart. Honestly, she wouldn't even qualify for a window-washing job at the streetcar shops in Erie, Pay."
CHAPTER XX
An American Win
DEMING'S campaign against the terrible German language was unable to advance perceptibly beyond the stage of preparations. These were somewhat elaborate, especially from the standpoint of expense. He had a multiplicity of instructors and grammars. If they had been placed side by side they might have reached from the Green Vault to the Zwinger.
DEMING'S campaign against the awful German language couldn't really make any significant progress past the planning phase. These plans were quite detailed, especially considering their cost. He had a whole bunch of teachers and grammar books. If you lined them up, they could have stretched from the Green Vault to the Zwinger.
He blamed these agencies of instruction. His "professors" he generally picked up at the Stadt Gotha where he played billiards. While these parties were fair with the ivories, they could not seem to knock any caroms of German around the cushions of Jim's brain.
He blamed these teaching agencies. He usually picked up his "professors" at the Stadt Gotha, where he played billiards. While these people were good with the pool balls, they couldn't seem to mentally hit any German knowledge into Jim's mind.
His daily routine was like this: At ten, his lesson in Dutch. Teacher would come. Great show of hospitality. There must be something[153] to drink. The preceptor must try one of the fancy pipes, of which Deming had collected a large array in Germany. He would be feeling knocked in this morning, having been up late consuming numerous bocks in amicable emulation of the local prowess. He had not got around to his lesson and had concluded he did not think much of his present grammar. Herr Preceptor would suggest procuring another which would strew roses no doubt along the thorny path. Capital idea. Of course they must then wait for the new grammar.
His daily routine went like this: At ten, he had his Dutch lesson. The teacher would arrive. A big show of hospitality. There had to be something[153] to drink. The tutor had to try one of the fancy pipes that Deming had collected in Germany. He was feeling rough that morning, having stayed up late drinking several bocks in friendly competition with the locals. He hadn’t gotten to his lesson and decided he wasn’t too impressed with his current grammar. Herr Preceptor suggested getting another one that would surely smooth out the rough spots. Great idea. Of course, they would then have to wait for the new grammar.
Adjournment at eleven to the café for billiards. Deming was a good wielder of the cue. He said the Germans were too be-spectacled and blear-eyed to play well and by three o'clock he had usually won quite a number of marks. This was making "easy money." It went toward paying for his evening's entertainment and was good economy. His pleasure account would not look so large to his governor. At three, to his hotel for afternoon dress. Evenings it was some other form of diversion. Home at all hours.
Adjournment at eleven to the café for billiards. Deming was skilled with the cue. He claimed that the Germans were too bespectacled and bleary-eyed to play well, and by three o'clock he had usually won quite a few marks. This was making "easy money." It went toward covering his evening's entertainment and was a smart way to save. His spending on entertainment wouldn’t look so big to his boss. At three, he headed to his hotel to change for the afternoon. In the evenings, it was some other form of fun. Home at all hours.
This was his day of study, of which his hopeful parents learned the promising side. Some[154]one advised him that if he did not try so hard to master German, it would come easier. But he experimented with this plan for a week and told Gard:
This was his study day, and his hopeful parents saw the bright side. Some[154]one suggested that if he didn’t push himself so hard to learn German, it would be easier. But he tried this approach for a week and told Gard:
"When you don't bone over the blamed language, it's surprising how much you don't know about it. It still takes me an hour and a half to hold a five minutes' conversation."
"When you don't really work on the language, it's amazing how much you don't understand it. It still takes me an hour and a half to have a five-minute conversation."
In two months he was thumbing page ten of the grammar, but he had seized upon a good many slang phrases, supercharged ejaculations. Though the undercurrent of his discouragement about his progress was considerable, it interfered little with his acquainting him proficiently with the restaurant world of Dresden. He saw and heard what was going on in those quarters, and through him Kirtley learned of that phase of German character and habits.
In two months, he was flipping through page ten of the grammar book, but he had picked up quite a few slang phrases and high-energy expressions. Even though he felt pretty discouraged about his progress, it didn’t stop him from becoming familiar with the restaurant scene in Dresden. He observed and listened to what was happening in those places, and through him, Kirtley learned about that aspect of German character and habits.
In view of everything, there had finally been no decent, reasonable way for Gard but to let Deming, professedly zealous of knowing German and seeing Teuton home life, into the Bucher circle. Aware that Jim was quite innocent enough morally, Gard avoided introducing him to Von Tielitz and Messer whose[155] depravities might prove harmful. But Deming at last met the former at Loschwitz and the two became friends just before Friedrich left in quest of another Kapellmeistership. The friction or explosion Gard rather expected between them over Fräulein did not occur. While he had dreaded such a happening for Jim's sake, it might have cleared the atmosphere pleasantly for his own. But Friedrich was delighted that Herr Deming showed his old neighbors, the Buchers, such munificent courtesies, and Jim thought Von Tielitz the most brilliant chap he had ever known.
Given everything, Gard ultimately had no reasonable option but to let Deming, who was genuinely eager to learn German and experience German home life, into the Bucher circle. Knowing that Jim was morally innocent, Gard avoided introducing him to Von Tielitz and Messer, whose depravity might be harmful. However, Deming eventually met the former in Loschwitz, and the two became friends just before Friedrich left to pursue another Kapellmeister position. The friction or conflict Gard had anticipated between them regarding Fräulein did not happen. Although he had feared this situation for Jim's sake, it might have cleared the air for him personally. But Friedrich was thrilled that Herr Deming extended such generous courtesies to his old neighbors, the Buchers, and Jim thought Von Tielitz was the most brilliant guy he had ever met.
Kirtley waited with fear, with trembling and also with some hopeful interest, for the fireworks resulting from Deming's induction to Villa Elsa. And they promptly began to soar, for Jim had, in his way, all the American speed, and proceeded to overwhelm the household with his attentions. It was a case of swift enthusiasm about the whole family. Unlike Kirtley he did not care how many of the members accompanied the Fräulein and him. All were welcome. Though he openly displayed his fascination about the Fräulein, it[156] had none of that tender sentiment which Gard was dissembling before his friend. Nevertheless it appeared to be a violent case of love at first sight, and before the first sight.
Kirtley waited with anxiety, nervousness, and a bit of hopeful curiosity for the fireworks that would come from Deming's arrival at Villa Elsa. They quickly began to take off, as Jim had all the American energy and went all out showering the household with his attention. He was enthusiastically engaged with the whole family. Unlike Kirtley, he didn't mind how many family members joined the Fräulein and him. Everyone was welcome. While he openly showed his fascination with the Fräulein, it[156] lacked the gentle sentiment that Gard was hiding from his friend. Still, it seemed like a classic case of love at first sight, even before the first sight.
Kirtley dropped out of the running. He excused himself by the necessity of burying himself deeper in his books on Teuton origins and traits. In a brief week the Buchers had forgotten him. All was Herr Deming—the wonderful Herr Deming—the fortunate youth who was bringing the witchery of good luck into the drab home. It was Herr Deming morning, noon and night.
Kirtley dropped out of the race. He justified it by saying he needed to dive deeper into his studies on Teuton origins and characteristics. In just a week, the Buchers had forgotten about him. It was all about Herr Deming—the amazing Herr Deming—the lucky guy who was bringing a touch of good fortune into their dull home. It was Herr Deming all day, every day.
There were theater parties, suppers on Brühl Terrace, plans for the next dance. Jim spread it on thick, and the dutiful, docile Elsa was swept along with the rest, although with a reserve in evocation as became the modesty of a maiden who was manifestly the pivotal center of all this vertiginous attraction and activity. The Buchers suddenly evinced a great and favorable curiosity about America. Their attitude toward it was revolutionized. They plied Gard with questions. What was living like there? It must be most desirable. Gard came across convenient hand books of knowledge, inconvenient encyclopedias and[157] atlases, lying here and there in the house, with pages opened freely at the United States. Frau Bucher became vociferous in praise of the advantages of the Yankee fashion of courtship over the slow, economical, dull, German process of match-making.
There were theater parties, dinners on Brühl Terrace, and plans for the next dance. Jim really played it up, and the obedient, compliant Elsa went along with everyone else, although she maintained a bit of distance, as was fitting for a modest girl who was clearly the focal point of all this overwhelming attraction and activity. The Buchers suddenly showed a keen and positive interest in America. Their perspective on it changed completely. They bombarded Gard with questions. What was life like there? It must be really appealing. Gard found practical guidebooks, inconvenient encyclopedias, and[157] atlases scattered around the house, with pages opened to the United States. Frau Bucher loudly praised the advantages of the American style of courtship over the slow, methodical, dull German way of matchmaking.
The household was overturned. Its affairs got dreadfully behind. Mother was mightily absorbed in getting out and fixing up imposing old dresses, laces, wraps, that were heirlooms or dated from her bridal days of a quarter of a century before. Elsa's lessons in etching and her methodical hours for perfecting her manifold talents, became badly confused.
The household was in chaos. Everything was seriously out of order. Mom was completely focused on digging out and repairing impressive old dresses, laces, and wraps that were family heirlooms or from her wedding days twenty-five years ago. Elsa's art lessons and her scheduled hours for honing her various skills got really mixed up.
The great thing was driving at the fashionable hour in the Grosse Garten. This was what the Buchers had never dreamed of. In the winter only the royal and very aristocratic families drove there. The common people, who might extravagantly expend a few marks to indulge in this pastime of nobility in summer, were frozen out of it in winter. Hot drinks in beer halls were then more to their taste.
The best part was driving through the Grosse Garten at the trendy time. This was something the Buchers had never imagined. In winter, only the royal and very elite families drove there. The ordinary folks, who might splurge a little to enjoy this noble activity in summer, were left out in winter. Hot drinks in beer halls were more their thing then.
But many an afternoon at four Deming, with his two ladies overdressed for the occa[158]sion in the dowdy German manner, occupying a handsome, heated limousine decorated with a conspicuous mirror and with Parma violets gently disengaging a delicate perfume, fell in right behind the king's household if possible, and toured the park in stately measure, being numbered, no doubt, by the open-mouthed beholder on the sidewalk, among the social elect in Saxony.
But many afternoons at four Deming, with his two ladies overdressed for the occasion in an outdated German style, occupied a fancy, heated limousine adorned with a noticeable mirror and with Parma violets softly releasing a delicate scent. They would try to fall in right behind the king's household if they could and take a leisurely drive through the park, undoubtedly being counted by the onlookers on the sidewalk as part of the social elite in Saxony.
Elsa was as good as engaged, as good as married. In her mother's eyes, bloodshot with all this glory of excitement, her daughter was already dwelling in a palace in that amazing city of Erie, in that splendid commonwealth of Pennsylvania, of whose double fame she had never before heard. For, of course, Deming sang constantly of the wonders of his native haunts, where wealth flowed out of the ground and the trolley system was the best in the world.
Elsa was practically engaged, basically married. In her mother's eyes, red from all the excitement, her daughter was already living in a palace in that amazing city of Erie, in that fantastic commonwealth of Pennsylvania, of which she had never heard before. Naturally, Deming always talked about the wonders of his hometown, where wealth seemed to come from the ground and the trolley system was the best in the world.
Thus the Americanization of Villa Elsa was accomplished in the twinkling of an eye. No more did Gard hear of the Yankee pigs. No more did he hear of the disgusting Yankee billions. Germany and America in union would form the blessed state which would command the globe, and the two excelling peoples, by[159] intermarrying, would produce a race too far ahead and above Frau Bucher's hoarse vocabulary to admit of much more than her Ach Himmels and Ach Gotts.
Thus, the Americanization of Villa Elsa happened in the blink of an eye. Gard no longer heard about the Yankee pigs. He no longer heard about the disgusting Yankee billions. Germany and America together would create a blessed nation that would lead the world, and the two exceptional peoples, by [159] intermarrying, would produce a race far too advanced for Frau Bucher's hoarse vocabulary, allowing for little more than her Ach Himmels and Ach Gotts.
CHAPTER XXI
A Unique or Unconventional People?
CONCURRENT with all these lively happenings Kirtley had cultivated the acquaintance of Miles Anderson. The two became very friendly. Gard had been so rudely treated by the great German professor in the lecture room that he was quite willing to conclude he could learn from the journalist far more of what he was interested in than from a Teuton university pulpit.
CCONCURRENT with all these lively events, Kirtley had formed a friendship with Miles Anderson. The two became quite close. Gard had been treated very poorly by the prominent German professor in the lecture hall, so he was more than happy to decide that he could learn much more from the journalist about what truly interested him than from a German university lecture.
Anderson, like himself, had entered Germany ignorant of the nation and its folk, and fully disposed to find almost everything worthy the highest praise. The elder's vivid convictions, his caustic reflections, were honestly born of what he had seen and heard in different parts of the land, not of what the Germans said of themselves in books, as was the customary rule. By virtue of his calling[161] he had superior opportunities for observation. He was therefore not a negligible imparter of information.
Anderson, like him, had arrived in Germany unaware of the country and its people, and ready to praise almost everything he encountered. The elder's strong beliefs and sharp observations were genuinely shaped by his experiences and interactions across different areas of the country, rather than by what Germans claimed about themselves in books, which was the usual approach. Because of his profession[161], he had better chances to observe. He was not someone to dismiss when it came to sharing information.
Gard usually found him in a high-ceilinged, majestic chamber in a typical Dresden pension, frequented, however, by only three or four boarders. It was a little like a home for Anderson, even if gloomily august in the German style. Dark woodwork, severely waxed floors on which Gard often slipped violently, huge doors, huge chairs and tables—everything large to suit the national taste for big Teuton gods and supermen. Long, thick stuffs concealed the passageways and windows and contributed to the absence of cheering light—that sign and symbol of the Gothic environment and disposition.
Gard usually found him in a spacious, impressive room in a typical Dresden pension, but it was only visited by three or four guests. It felt somewhat like a home for Anderson, even if it had a gloomy, grand German vibe. The dark wood features, waxed floors that Gard often slipped on, and the large doors, chairs, and tables—all of it was oversized to match the national preference for big Teuton gods and supermen. Heavy fabrics covered the hallways and windows, adding to the lack of bright light—that sign and symbol of the Gothic atmosphere and mindset.
The first question the old man usually plumped was:
The first question the old man typically asked was:
"How's your German going?"
"How's your German study going?"
"Slowly. Pegging along. I suppose it's because I don't get up much of a liking for it. There's something about it that goes against my grain."
"Slowly. Trailing along. I guess it's because I'm not really into it. There's something about it that just doesn't sit right with me."
And then Anderson would be off for that particular session. On one early occasion he had said, jestingly:
And then Anderson would be done for that particular session. One time early on, he joked:
[162]"I guess you will have to fall back upon the natural method."
[162]"I suppose you’ll have to rely on the natural approach."
"What's that?" had come back the innocent interrogatory.
"What's that?" came the innocent question.
"Take a sweetheart. She will teach you more useful German in a month than you can learn from the pedagogues in a year. Right here in the best parts of Dresden are streets where these ladies can be rented with their rooms per week or per month cheap, with all the German you want thrown in. Are we to assume it is by this system that the German universities are able to turn out what the world believes are the best students?"
"Get yourself a sweetheart. She'll teach you more practical German in a month than you could learn from teachers in a year. Right here in the best areas of Dresden, there are streets where you can rent these ladies along with their rooms for a week or a month at a low cost, with all the German you want included. Should we conclude that this is how the German universities manage to produce what the world considers the best students?"
"I never heard anything about that back home," confessed Kirtley, always letting the bars down to encourage a monologue.
"I never heard anything about that back home," Kirtley admitted, always lowering the bars to prompt a monologue.
"Of course not. That would be to interfere with our American readiness to admit German transcendence."
"Of course not. That would interfere with our willingness as Americans to acknowledge German greatness."
"But how do you harmonize the frank state of morals here with the fact that the Germans are the great religious authorities? How have they established such a reputation abroad for the morality that is assumed to go with Protestantism?"
"But how do you reconcile the straightforward state of morals here with the fact that the Germans are major religious authorities? How have they built such a reputation abroad for the morality that is presumed to accompany Protestantism?"
"That is simple enough. First, by claim[163]ing that the French are degenerate. Second, by retaining religion with its morals as an adjunct of an unmoral and authoritative militarism. Religion is to them a topic for expert investigation and study just as is militarism or any natural product—oil, coal, the chemical elements, anything. The Teuton specialist goes at it as at any objective science. His analytical and synthetic processes simply explore in his own subterranean caverns apropos of theology. He has taken over the Bible as the Kaiser has taken over Jerusalem. Wilhelm is becoming the Cerberus of Christianity—sole and surly guardian of its meanings and influence.
"That's pretty straightforward. First, by claiming that the French are degenerate. Second, by keeping religion and its morals as part of a brutal and authoritative militarism. To them, religion is just another topic for serious investigation and study, similar to militarism or any natural resource—like oil, coal, or chemical elements. The German expert approaches it like any objective science. His analytical and synthetic methods simply delve into his own underground thoughts about theology. He has taken the Bible just as the Kaiser has taken over Jerusalem. Wilhelm is becoming the fierce guardian of Christianity—its sole and grumpy keeper of its meanings and influence."
"But you never see any men in these German churches, do you? They don't go to church. Nor the women very much. You see old women and children at worship. This is because the German has always typically worshipped Gott on the battlefield or in the military camps—out in the open. The German God is an out-of-doors God and is distinctively associated with the thought of war. God within walls, within a church, is a deity of good will on earth. He is a deity of peace. Naturally this does not appeal to the Goth.[164] He don't pay much lively attention to God unless there's a war on hand or in immediate prospect. Then he begins to shout and 'holler' at Him to attract His attention, because He is so far off from Germany."
"But you never really see any men in these German churches, do you? They don't go to church. And neither do the women that much. You mostly see old women and children at worship. This is because Germans have always tended to worship God on the battlefield or in military camps—out in the open. The German God is an outdoors God and is closely linked with the idea of war. God inside four walls, like in a church, is a deity of good will on earth. He is a deity of peace. Naturally, this doesn't appeal to the Goth.[164] He doesn't pay much attention to God unless there's a war going on or one is in sight. Then he starts to shout and 'holler' at Him to get His attention because He seems so far away from Germany."
Gard laughed. Then, after a moment, he asked, almost shyly,
Gard laughed. Then, after a moment, he asked, almost shyly,
"If German morals and religion have little necessary relation—little actual relation—how about love?"
"If German morals and religion have little necessary connection—little actual connection—what about love?"
"The German would never have known of love if he had not heard it talked of," replied Anderson with responsive geniality, pleased with Kirtley's amused face. "Generally an excess of a moral religion destroys love, just as the absence of it in the past has been apt to go with an indecent and widespread sensuality. So we have, what is called, the beastliness in the Teuton. For he has to go, as you know, to an extreme in things—logical extreme. This is why he is only partly human, from our standpoint. The human is so constructed that he can't stand excess in any direction very long and remain human. Everything has to be diluted, alloyed, temporized for him or it is not bearable—it will not work successfully.
"The German would never have understood love if he hadn't heard people talking about it," Anderson replied cheerfully, enjoying Kirtley's amused expression. "Generally, an overabundance of strict morality stifles love, just as a lack of it in the past often leads to rampant and inappropriate sensuality. This is what we refer to as the beastliness in the Teuton. As you know, he tends to go to extremes—logical extremes. This is why, from our perspective, he is only partially human. Humans are built in such a way that they can't endure excess in any form for very long and still remain human. Everything has to be toned down, mixed, or balanced for him; otherwise, it's unbearable—it simply won't function effectively."
[165]"We see this in medicine—conspicuously. Medicines pure from the hands of Mother Nature are too strong, too rank in their purity, to be properly effective. They have to be weakened, reduced, compounded with inferior elements, to be of service. So with Truth. People are always begging for Truth, seeking the ultimate Truth, as if that would bring the perfect state of happiness. This is childlike ignorance. Truth in its pure, perfect condition would simply kill them—like unadulterated drugs. They could not stand its blinding light. They could not stand the shock. Like the rest—to change the metaphor—it has to be made up so largely of shoddy to wear well or wear at all.
[165]"We see this clearly in medicine. Medicines that come directly from Mother Nature are too strong and pure to be truly effective. They need to be diluted, modified, and mixed with less potent ingredients to be useful. The same goes for Truth. People are always asking for Truth, searching for the ultimate Truth, as if that would lead to perfect happiness. This is naive thinking. Pure, unfiltered Truth would simply overwhelm them—like raw drugs. They couldn't handle its blinding light. They couldn't withstand the shock. Like many things—changing the metaphor—it needs to be significantly mixed with inferior elements to be usable or even bearable."
"Love, the same way. When the world talks of love so much, it means only friendliness—you like me and I like you—you do something kind for me and I will do something kind for you. Love in its alloyed form of friendship is its efficacious shape for universal use. Pure love, which poor humanity is always reaching out its hands for, simply—as George Sand said—simply tears people to pieces without doing them any good. The result is tragedy, despair, wrecked lives, death before one's time.[166] We see that everywhere depicted in fiction, in the drama, at the opera.
"Love is the same way. When people talk a lot about love, they usually mean just friendliness—you like me and I like you—you do something nice for me, and I’ll do something nice for you. Love in its diluted form as friendship is the most effective version for everyone to use. Pure love, which humanity is always reaching out for, like George Sand said, just tears people apart without actually helping them. The result is tragedy, despair, destroyed lives, and dying too young.[166] We see this everywhere in fiction, in plays, and at the opera."
"So the German has kept love in a practical state—for him—by associating it so prominently with his procreative capacities. It is a case of Mars and Venus producing fighting men."
"So, the German has kept love practical—for him—by linking it closely to his ability to reproduce. It's a situation where Mars and Venus create warriors."
"If the German is not governed by love as an ideal," put in Gard, "how is it then that he is so sentimental? People always assure us that Fritz must be really at bottom as affectionate, tender, emotional, as anyone because he is so sentimental."
"If the German isn't guided by love as an ideal," Gard interjected, "how is it that he’s so sentimental? People constantly assure us that Fritz must genuinely be as affectionate, tender, and emotional as anyone because he is so sentimental."
"Yes, that's the old conundrum that the enthusiasts over everything German confuse one with. The German's fondness—gobbling-down fondness—for food does not prove that he is a gourmet. The Teuton sentimentality is like mush. It's principally for children. As Fritz keeps a good deal of his childishness about him as he grows up, he keeps this taste for mush. It takes the place of sentiment which is of the proper mental pabulum for enlightened adults. You can't write poetry about mush. So the Germans have little poetry worth talking about. Where their emotional side ought to be, they are slightly[167] developed beyond the youthful stage of sentimentalism. Their abortive conception of love, their treatment of their women and children—other things—all account for this naturally enough. One is rather forced, in spite of himself, to take the Germans at either of two extremes in order to understand them candidly—mushiness or iron."
"Yes, that’s the old puzzle that fans of all things German mix up. The German's deep love—devouring love—for food doesn’t mean he’s a gourmet. Their sentimentality is like mush. It's mainly for children. Since Fritz holds onto a lot of his childishness as he matures, he also retains this taste for mush. It replaces real sentiment, which is the proper mental nourishment for enlightened adults. You can’t write poetry about mush. So, the Germans have little poetry worth mentioning. Where their emotional depth should be, they are slightly[167] evolved beyond the youthful phase of sentimentalism. Their flawed idea of love and how they treat their women and children—among other things—naturally explain this. One is somewhat compelled, despite oneself, to view the Germans through one of two extremes to understand them openly—mushiness or iron."
CHAPTER XXII
Preparing for War
ANDERSON did not care for the Buchers and only came two or three times to Villa Elsa. So Gard did the calling. The elder would invariably bring out from his table drawer his "bachelor's bride" in the form of a box of clear Havanas, and the "lecture" would begin again before, what he said, was the most select audience in Deutschland.
ANDERSON didn’t really like the Buchers and only visited Villa Elsa two or three times. So Gard did the visiting instead. The older man would always pull out his "bachelor's bride," which was a box of fine Havanas, from his desk drawer, and the "lecture" would start up again before what he claimed was the most exclusive audience in Germany.
"Have you heard anything from your spy?" he queried one day.
"Have you gotten any updates from your informant?" he asked one day.
"No. You don't seriously mean that Rudolph—you assume it's Rudolph—is watching me?" returned Kirtley, a little disturbed over the recurrence to this subject. "What am I guilty of? I'm as innocent as an unborn lamb."
"No. You really can't be saying that Rudolph—you think it's Rudolph—is watching me?" Kirtley replied, slightly unsettled by the return to this topic. "What have I done wrong? I'm as innocent as a newborn lamb."
"Certainly you are. But, my dear boy, what's innocence in Germany? The Secret Police can make an alien like you a lot of[169] trouble about nothing. You wouldn't believe how systematic they are, and serious as stuffed owls. Take my advice and don't do things at too loose ends as we are apt to over home. But if you do get into trouble, come to me and I will tell you what to say.
"Of course you are. But, my dear boy, what does innocence even mean in Germany? The Secret Police can create a lot of[169] trouble for an outsider like you over nothing. You wouldn’t believe how organized they are, and as serious as stuffed owls. Take my advice and don't act too carelessly like we often do back home. But if you do find yourself in trouble, come to me and I'll tell you what to say."
"Sometimes they even have one spy spying on another in the home. Of course the spy system, like the army and navy, belongs to the Kaiser. All the people have to do is to furnish the men and the money. It's as Heine said, the royal palaces and so forth are owned by the princes, but the debts owing for them are assumed by the public. The Hohenzollerns have the property, the Germans have the obligations.
"Sometimes they even have one spy watching another in the home. Of course, the spy system, like the army and navy, belongs to the Kaiser. All the people have to do is provide the men and the money. It's like Heine said, the royal palaces and such are owned by the princes, but the debts for them are taken on by the public. The Hohenzollerns have the property, the Germans have the obligations."
"You see, the spy system tends to prevent the Teuton from talking politics. But he can theorize concerning the State. The State is an active philosophic concept that holds off the people from discussing and gossiping about Wilhelm. It does not exist apart from the ruling family and apart from the bureaucracy which is the ruling family in action. It takes on their character. The State is a mirage which the citizen is made to gawk at in the air, thinking he sees something besides the[170] frowning German sky. It surrounds the Emperor with the divine halo, removes him up above the rumbling clouds where the distant views lend enchantment."
"You see, the spy system usually keeps the German from discussing politics. But he can still theorize about the State. The State is an active philosophical concept that stops people from talking and gossiping about Wilhelm. It doesn’t exist without the ruling family and the bureaucracy, which is just the ruling family in action. It takes on their character. The State is an illusion that the citizen is made to stare at in the air, thinking he sees something other than the[170] gloomy German sky. It surrounds the Emperor with a divine halo, lifting him above the stormy clouds where the distant view feels magical."
There hung about Anderson's talk to-day, as so frequently, a certain sententious and acidulous manner that, to Gard, evidenced twinges of rheumatism.
There was a certain pompous and sharp way about Anderson's talk today, as often happens, that made Gard think he was feeling some aches from rheumatism.
The dialogue fell once more on war. After the demonstration in Villa Elsa against America, Anderson was gratified by this proof of his contentions. While Kirtley admitted the force in the argument that this excited and confident condition of feeling among the common German people pointed toward hostilities, he could not really believe that such a horror would break forth upon Europe. There was the Hague Convention—
The conversation turned back to war again. After the protest in Villa Elsa against America, Anderson felt satisfied by this evidence backing his claims. Kirtley acknowledged the validity of the argument that this excited and confident mood among ordinary Germans suggested a move towards conflict, but he couldn't truly believe that such a nightmare would erupt across Europe. There was the Hague Convention—
"Pooh!" exclaimed Anderson. "What does the Hague Convention signify in face of the growing armaments? What have you ever seen in Prussian history to show that Prussia would stop for any agreement when she was sure of winning?"
"Pooh!" said Anderson. "What does the Hague Convention mean in light of the increasing arms buildup? What have you ever seen in Prussian history that suggests Prussia would back down from any agreement when they were confident of victory?"
"You expect war soon," said Gard. "Why soon? Granted the Germans want war to carry out their world plans, why should it[171] come before another generation, for instance?"
"You think war is coming soon," said Gard. "Why soon? Sure, the Germans want war to achieve their global goals, but why should it[171] happen before another generation, for example?"
"Because the Kaiser is getting along in years. Time does not wait even for him. Alexander, Cæsar, Napoleon were young in comparison. So he is talking a lot about God now and that means war. He wants to enjoy ruling Europe awhile before he dies. He does not get on with the Crown Prince and is not greatly interested in leaving all such glory for him to sport about in. Soon Wilhelm the Deuce will be too old to take part in a military campaign. He has not many years to live at his age. He is not a well man. The longer he puts it off, the shorter will be the triumph he craves."
"Because the Kaiser is getting older. Time doesn’t wait for anyone, not even him. Alexander, Caesar, Napoleon were young compared to him. Now he talks a lot about God, and that means war. He wants to enjoy ruling Europe for a bit longer before he dies. He doesn’t get along with the Crown Prince and isn’t really interested in leaving all that glory for him to flaunt. Soon Wilhelm the Deuce will be too old to participate in a military campaign. He doesn’t have many years left at his age. He’s not in great health. The longer he delays, the shorter the triumph he desires will be."
The talk shifted angles and Anderson was saying after awhile:
The conversation took a different turn, and after a while, Anderson said:
"When you have the German statesmen, generals, magnates, press, professors, theologians, everybody, insisting on the incomparable virtues of the Germans and never on their failings—on their rights and privileges and never on their duties to humanity—do you wonder that the plain people, like your Buchers, think it devolves upon them to turn foreign lands into waste by the sword in order[172] to convert them into German countries? It is hard to find in any German publication a frank and commending acknowledgment that a foreigner has really completed anything to his credit. If such evidence is too strong in any case and forces an admission, the foreign inventor or discoverer is rather made to appear presumptuous in acting before some German got around to it. The Teutons never think, talk and write in terms of humanity—only in terms of Germanity. Do you not begin to see that the Teutons are, in intent, as murderously fanatical about their greatness as the mad Mullah and his followers were about their bigotry? The Germans have been educated to these views since childhood....
"When you have German politicians, generals, elites, the media, academics, and theologians all insisting on the unmatched virtues of Germans while never mentioning their shortcomings—focusing on their rights and privileges instead of their responsibilities to humanity—do you really wonder why regular people, like your Buchers, feel it's their duty to invade foreign lands and destroy them in order to turn them into German territories? It’s hard to find any German publication that honestly and positively acknowledges that a foreigner has accomplished something worthwhile. If the evidence is too overwhelming to ignore, the foreign inventor or discoverer is often portrayed as arrogant for acting before a German had the chance. Germans only think, talk, and write in terms of their own identity—never about humanity as a whole. Don’t you start to realize that Germans are, in their intentions, as dangerously fanatic about their perceived greatness as the mad Mullah and his followers were about their bigotry? Germans have been conditioned to these beliefs since childhood...."
"You tell me that Charlemagne took on Christian religion as a prop to, an ally of, his military power—an aid to the extension of his rule. Well, then, the Teutons have turned what they call their Christianity into a warlike worship of themselves. Their preachers must stand in with the Kaiser. He is to them God on earth. It is the old story of the throne upheld by the official church."
"You say that Charlemagne adopted Christianity to support his military power and help expand his reign. Well, the Teutons have transformed what they call their Christianity into a militant worship of themselves. Their preachers are aligned with the Kaiser. To them, he is God on earth. It’s the same old story of the throne backed by the official church."
"But how about all Catholic Germany?" parried Gard. "About one-third is Catholic."
"But what about all of Catholic Germany?" Gard replied. "Around one-third of it is Catholic."
[173]"True, true. Yet from what I've seen, the German Catholics will be found fighting for the Protestants when war comes, just as the Socialists will be found fighting for the Emperor. This is because the feeling for race and nation is far stronger than for creed or doctrine. If the Kaiser succeeds in getting control of Europe, he will take to himself the spiritual and religious headship of the world and the Pope will become essentially his vassal, for the Pope will be impotent as against the victorious sword. Hasn't Wilhelm already assumed to be the head of Mohammedanism?
[173]"True, true. But from what I've seen, German Catholics will end up fighting for the Protestants when war breaks out, just like Socialists will support the Emperor. This is because loyalty to race and nation is much stronger than loyalty to creed or doctrine. If the Kaiser manages to take control of Europe, he will claim spiritual and religious leadership of the world, making the Pope essentially his subordinate, because the Pope will be powerless against a victorious army. Hasn't Wilhelm already tried to position himself as the leader of Islam?
"And look at it. South Germany, which is Catholic, and Saxony here, are cramped up in the interior. Their manufacturing interests are increasing by leaps and bounds. Isn't it natural they should want a direct outlet to the Atlantic and Mediterranean? Wouldn't these Saxons be proud to have a piece of real ocean shore to use as their own?
"And look at it. Southern Germany, which is Catholic, and Saxony here, are stuck in the interior. Their manufacturing interests are growing rapidly. Isn’t it natural that they would want a direct route to the Atlantic and Mediterranean? Wouldn’t these Saxons be proud to have their own piece of oceanfront to call their own?"
"Another thing. As the Germans are brutal among themselves, I predict that, stirred up as they are, they will be brutal like Huns in this war. You see how they deal with their own women. Imagine what they will do to foreign women. How do you yourself think[174] your young military Bucher would act toward Americans if he landed on our coast with a gun? The German will be like a Hun just as he was in the treacherous days of Ariovistus and Arminius—the Teutoberger forest and all that over again. He will red-handedly rebuff civilizing influences just as he did in those days."
"Another thing. Since the Germans are brutal with each other, I predict that, stirred up as they are, they will act like Huns in this war. Look at how they treat their own women. Just think about what they will do to foreign women. How do you think[174] your young military Bucher would behave toward Americans if he landed on our coast with a gun? The German will be like a Hun just as he was in the treacherous days of Ariovistus and Arminius—the Teutoberger forest and all that all over again. He will aggressively reject civilizing influences just like he did back then."
"How do you define Hun?" asked Gard. "The Germans are not Huns by race."
"How do you define a Hun?" Gard asked. "The Germans aren't Huns by race."
"No. I said like Huns. I mean by Huns a people who insist on their tribal sovereign right of conquest by means of ruthless murder and senseless destruction—wiping out foreign races and property."
"No. I said like Huns. I mean by Huns a group of people who claim their tribal right to conquer through brutal killing and pointless destruction—eliminating other races and their property."
One evening the conversation drifted to this theme:
One evening, the conversation shifted to this topic:
"Is Luther—Protestantism—one of the reasons why Protestant America is so favorably inclined to Germany?" suggested Kirtley.
"Is Luther—Protestantism—one of the reasons why Protestant America is so positively inclined toward Germany?" suggested Kirtley.
"Americans would be surprised to find there is no such thing as Lutheranism here. A bumptious military cult has usurped its place. There are no Lutherans in Deutschland—only Evangelicals and Dissidents. And of course Catholics. If you ask an ordinary Teu[175]ton what Protestantism is, he will scarcely know what you mean precisely. American Protestantism and German Protestantism are radically unlike. The one is peaceful and trustful, the other is warlike and knavish.
"Americans would be surprised to find that there’s no such thing as Lutheranism here. A brash military cult has taken its place. There are no Lutherans in Germany—only Evangelicals and Dissidents. And of course, Catholics. If you ask an average German what Protestantism is, they will hardly understand what you’re talking about. American Protestantism and German Protestantism are completely different. One is peaceful and trusting, while the other is aggressive and deceitful."
"And it seems to me so plain that, besides our religionists, our American education is playing in with the Kaiser's plans. It tends to weaken faith in our government. It makes unpatriotic citizens. Our colleges turn out young men who feel no political duties. We teach them to look for benefits without responsibilities. How different with the German universities! Our school histories, too, nurse active hatred of England, and everywhere with us the main opinion about the French is fostered that they are immoral and therefore to be despised. All this works in with the advancement of German popularity and interests, while at the same time our young men, like you, are sent here to study. Only the best in Germany is diligently kept before our people. The worst is never known as you and I are learning to know it over here."
"And it seems obvious to me that, aside from our religious leaders, our American education is aligning with the Kaiser's plans. It's weakening trust in our government. It's creating unpatriotic citizens. Our colleges produce young men who feel no political responsibilities. We teach them to seek benefits without any obligations. How different it is with the German universities! Our school histories also promote strong animosity toward England, and everywhere in our society, the common view of the French is that they are immoral and thus deserving of contempt. All of this contributes to the rise of German popularity and interests, while at the same time, our young men, like you, come here to study. Only the best of Germany is actively presented to our people. The worst is never known, as you and I are coming to understand it here."
"So you think," said Gard companionably, "that the Kaiser will set his fiery ball rolling this spring."
"So you think," said Gard casually, "that the Kaiser will set his fiery ball in motion this spring."
[176]"I put the date at March first." The old man's hands trembled as he relighted his cigar stub. His voice almost broke.
[176] "I set the date for March first." The old man's hands shook as he lit his cigar stub again. His voice nearly cracked.
"I know they think I'm getting in my dotage—brain a little cracked—and all that. I'm a poor chap possessed of a foolish and wicked delusion. Mean well, but head rickety. Sometimes I really think I must be crazy, with all the world against me about the German danger. They call me Jeremiah and Mother Goose rolled into one. But, by God, Kirtley, as my soul's immortal, I tell you I'm right—I'm right! The deluge is just ahead!—and nothing being done to prevent it." He shouted the words till Gard almost shook.
"I know they think I’m losing my mind—brain a little fried—and all that. I’m just a guy with a silly and dangerous delusion. I mean well, but my head's a little out of whack. Sometimes I really think I must be losing it, with everyone against me about the German threat. They call me Jeremiah and Mother Goose rolled into one. But, I swear to you, Kirtley, as sure as my soul is immortal, I’m right—I’m right! The flood is just around the corner!—and nobody's doing anything to stop it." He shouted the words until Gard almost shook.
Every time he left Anderson, he would settle back into the lulling arms of false security, but always a little less assured. How could the old newspaper man be correct and the rest of mankind be in error? He used the stock arguments with himself. Granted that the obese Germans about him on the tram trundling along toward Loschwitz were talking war and preparing for war. They had been doing so for forty-three years and no conflict had come. Immense populations of peace and unpreparedness were growing up[177] who would discourage a world war—would not permit it. There were increasing millions of people who had never seen a soldier, never seen a battleship. Would they want to pay the cost in blood and billions of treasure? It was unthinkable.
Every time he left Anderson, he settled back into the comforting illusion of safety, but he always felt a bit less certain. How could the old newspaper guy be right while everyone else was wrong? He went through the familiar arguments in his mind. Sure, the overweight Germans around him on the tram heading toward Loschwitz were talking about war and getting ready for it. They had been doing that for forty-three years, and yet no conflict had occurred. Huge populations of peace and unpreparedness were emerging[177] who would stop a world war—who simply wouldn’t allow it. There were millions of people who had never seen a soldier or a battleship. Would they really want to pay the price in blood and billions of dollars? It was impossible to imagine.
And so everyone was floating on with these comfortable convictions—floating on toward the imminent cataclysm, smiling pityingly on the few lugubrious Andersons who were right.
And so everyone was going along with these comfortable beliefs—heading toward the upcoming disaster, smiling sympathetically at the few gloomy Andersons who were actually right.
CHAPTER XXIII
Social Etiquette
BALLS and dancing are a notable expression of life and character in Germany. The Teuton has a passion for them. In what country are they so institutional? The German dance music is on the whole by far the best any land has composed. The waltzes are fine productions of the race. They are not enemic, lascivious or empty of meaning. They are noble, wholesome and full-throbbing with the pounding blood of men and women.
BALLS and dancing are a significant expression of life and character in Germany. Germans have a deep passion for them. In which country are they so deeply embedded in the culture? The dance music from Germany is, overall, the best any country has produced. The waltzes are excellent creations of the people. They are not shallow, lewd, or meaningless. They are noble, wholesome, and pulsating with the vibrant energy of men and women.
German balls are most varied in kind, responding to the complete scale of existence from high to low. However dowdy, rigid, ungainly or sensual they may be, their music is nearly always elevating or at least of merit because it is written by thoroughly trained composers of whom Germany has a full complement. One of the dreams of any American woman in Europe has been to dance with a[179] German officer who, in his handsome, well-fitting uniform setting off his commanding proportions and guarded forcefully by his clattering sword and jingling spurs, appealed to those instincts for knightliness and chivalric appearance which excite the feminine nature.
German balls come in many different styles, catering to all levels of society. No matter how outdated, stiff, awkward, or seductive they might be, the music is usually uplifting or at least respectable since it's created by well-trained composers, of which Germany has plenty. One of the dreams for any American woman in Europe has been to dance with a[179] German officer who, in his sharp, well-fitted uniform highlighting his strong physique and protected by his noisy sword and jingling spurs, appeals to the instincts of knighthood and chivalry that excite the feminine spirit.
Nevertheless the general unloveliness of the social disposition and activities of the Teutons is normally reflected in their balls, and is increased by their tremendous and perspiring energies in this diversion where usually pervades an atmosphere thick with the odors of beer, sausage, cheese.
Nevertheless, the general lack of charm in the social behavior and activities of the Teutons is typically seen in their gatherings, and it’s amplified by their intense and sweaty enthusiasm for this pastime, where the air is often heavy with the smells of beer, sausage, and cheese.
The Royal Court Ball opened the fashionable season every winter in Dresden as proper in an orthodox monarchy. It was Kirtley's one opportunity to view German royalty, in its intimacy of pumps and low necks, at a ceremonious function in a whirl of music and the dance. Naturally he wanted to be present with Elsa who was, of course, competent in the art of Terpsichore. To say the least she was the only young lady he knew well in Saxony, and to have her hair of ripe corn color dancing in its luxuriance before his eyes to the inspiring melodies of the opera bands would be something to thrill him and his memories after[180]ward. He would take a box and somehow manage to moor Frau Bucher in its depths.
The Royal Court Ball kicked off the fashionable season every winter in Dresden, just like it should in a traditional monarchy. It was Kirtley’s only chance to see German royalty up close, decked out in fancy outfits and low-cut dresses, at a formal gathering filled with music and dancing. Naturally, he wanted to be there with Elsa, who was definitely skilled at dancing. To put it simply, she was the only young woman he knew well in Saxony, and seeing her corn-colored hair swaying gracefully to the beautiful tunes of the orchestra would be something that excited him and stuck in his memory afterward. He would book a box and somehow manage to get Frau Bucher settled in it.
His hopes had sprung up about it for, luckily, Von Tielitz had gone away and Jim, who had put the family in such a state of intoxication, was to be in Prague and Warsaw for a month. It would be a chance for the obscured Gard to emerge into the light and see how Elsa was really affected by the Deming glamor. Of all her booby family she had comported herself so far with a dutiful steadiness in face of his dizzying coup de main. As for Von Tielitz and a respectable young woman—how could there be anything serious ahead?
His hopes had risen because, fortunately, Von Tielitz had left, and Jim, who had gotten the family so worked up, would be in Prague and Warsaw for a month. This would be a chance for the overlooked Gard to step into the spotlight and see how Elsa was truly influenced by the Deming charm. Among all her silly relatives, she had handled his stunning move with a calm and dutiful demeanor. As for Von Tielitz and a respectable young woman—how could anything serious possibly come of that?
During Jim's trip Fräulein plunged into her etching to make up for absences. But Gard was pleased over the renewal of their piano duos which had been abandoned after Deming's arrival. She very loyally found a little time for this distraction, and so, as before, they played through earnest stuff and tasseled it off with lighter emotions in the form of "Heart and Hand," "Love's Dreams," "Affection True"—good things with which to court a musical girl. Her cordiality suddenly took on a frank warmness, as if she had come back to an old friend. He[181] saw that she felt more at home with him. Wasn't she at last becoming like a "pal"? Yet sometimes the doubtful impression assailed him that she was merely acting in a sort of gratefulness for his having brought the stylish and princely James Alexander Deming of Erie, Pay, to Villa Elsa.
During Jim's trip, Fräulein dove into her etching to make up for lost time. But Gard was happy about the revival of their piano duets, which had stopped after Deming arrived. She managed to find a bit of time for this pastime, and so, as before, they played through serious pieces and wrapped it up with lighter tunes like "Heart and Hand," "Love's Dreams," and "Affection True"—good choices for winning over a musical girl. Her friendliness suddenly felt genuinely warm, as if she had reconnected with an old friend. He[181] noticed she seemed more comfortable with him. Was she finally becoming like a "buddy"? Yet sometimes he was hit by the unsettling thought that she was just putting on an act out of gratitude for his having introduced the stylish and regal James Alexander Deming of Erie, Pay, to Villa Elsa.
Gard was quite happy when his invitation to the ball was accepted. Both mother and daughter were most glad to go. He procured the box and Frau Bucher, steeped in the practices of economy and judging that his means were modest, pooh-pooed with material kindness at his idea of an expensive motor car. He insisted on compromising by ordering one at five in the morning for the return. It would be an event and he wished to carry it off quite grandly for Elsa's sake. She had never attended the Court Ball, it turned out, and, like all maidens of Saxony, had always longed to go.
Gard was really happy when his invitation to the ball got accepted. Both mother and daughter were really excited about going. He arranged for a box, and Frau Bucher, who was practical and aware of his modest income, dismissed his idea of an expensive car with a kind but teasing attitude. He insisted on finding a compromise by booking one for the return trip at five in the morning. It would be a special occasion, and he wanted to make it a grand experience for Elsa. She had never been to the Court Ball, it turned out, and like all young women from Saxony, she had always dreamed of attending.
Accordingly due preparations were started by her mother and by her in what had served, since Deming's arrival, as a kind of boudoir. The gala affair was talked over with the usual noisiness in the family. Anything that had to do with the King's household was[182] wonderful. The neighbors were exultantly apprised. Certainly the Buchers were nowadays cutting a high figure—they to whom such costly festivities had been unknown. No one had ever associated Villa Elsa with the wand of prodigality, and its vulgar Americans were dumfounding.
Accordingly, her mother and she began making preparations in what had become, since Deming's arrival, a sort of private retreat. The big event was discussed with the usual noise in the family. Anything related to the King's household was[182] considered amazing. The neighbors were excitedly informed. Indeed, the Buchers were now making quite a name for themselves—especially since such extravagant celebrations were new to them. No one had ever linked Villa Elsa with lavishness, and its ordinary Americans were quite astonishing.
But, four days before the ball, Frau Bucher, in a constant condition of agitation in her social upheaval, announced to Gard that she and Fräulein could not accompany him because a telegram had been received from Friedrich. His sister at Meissen was coming for the occasion and he took it for granted that the Buchers would complete his company. Of course Friedrich and his sister could not be disappointed. They were old friends—really a part of the family. Gard, greatly disappointed, reclaimed his money for the box and countermanded the order for the motor. It was provoking, yet such things very reasonably happened.
But, four days before the ball, Frau Bucher, constantly on edge due to her social turmoil, informed Gard that she and Fräulein couldn’t join him because they had received a telegram from Friedrich. His sister from Meissen was coming for the event, and he assumed the Buchers would complete his group. Naturally, Friedrich and his sister couldn’t be let down. They were old friends—essentially part of the family. Gard, feeling very disappointed, requested a refund for the box and canceled the motor order. It was frustrating, but these things understandably happened.
The next morning another telegram from the always excited Von Tielitz. Plans were changed. Sister did not think she would be able to leave. Frau Bucher would much like to go with Gard. Elsa was so anxious to[183] dance at Court. It would be too bad to dash her anticipations to the ground. Gard spent the day renewing the arrangements. It was a pleasure to do so.
The next morning, there was another telegram from the always enthusiastic Von Tielitz. Plans had changed. Sister didn't think she would be able to leave. Frau Bucher would really like to go with Gard. Elsa was so eager to[183] dance at Court. It would be such a shame to crush her hopes. Gard spent the day updating the arrangements. It was a joy to do so.
That evening a note couched in the spacious terms of formality was handed in at his door by Tekla. Frau Bucher was extremely sorry, but Friedrich and his sister had found they could come and were making all preparations. Herr Kirtley's invitation must be declined again.
That evening, a note written in very formal language was delivered to his door by Tekla. Mrs. Bucher was very sorry, but Friedrich and his sister had decided they could come and were making all the arrangements. Mr. Kirtley's invitation had to be declined once again.
Beginning to be put out, he found that his box could not now be returned. And he had no one to go with. It would be stupid to be there without even an acquaintance. At last he thought of Anderson. The latter announced his satisfaction at the prospect of "seeing the Germans jump around." Gard's dancing was cut off, which was disappointing enough, yet he could at least see the spectacle.
Starting to feel anxious, he realized that he couldn't get his box back now. Plus, he had no one to join him. It would be silly to be there without even a friend. Finally, he thought of Anderson. He was happy about the chance to "watch the Germans dance around." Gard's chance to dance was gone, which was disappointing, but at least he could still enjoy the show.
The following morning, the day before the event, another wire, and another cramped, stiff note through the diplomatic channels of the kitchen reached the attic. More regrets, but the Von Tielitzes were unable to carry out their plan. Would not Herr Kirtley kindly renew his invitation? This stately despatch[184]ing of communications, as with a foreign power, went on side by side of and unseparated from the usual daily informal intercourse of the family.
The next morning, the day before the event, another wire and another stiff, cramped note arrived through the diplomatic channels of the kitchen to the attic. More apologies, but the Von Tielitzes couldn't go ahead with their plans. Would Herr Kirtley please extend his invitation again? This formal exchange[184] of messages, like dealing with a foreign power, continued alongside the usual daily informal interactions of the family.
Gard's good nature wrestled with his balanced equilibrium and overcame it along the lines of gallant generosity. It would be a pity to deprive the ladies of what they had looked forward to, although his own expectations were already marred. He would bemean himself sufficiently to overlook Frau's caddishness. He went in town to see if the change would suit his invited friend. Anderson bravely rose to the occasion and accepted silently the duty of having to tour the ball room now and then with his arm despairingly clasping the rotundity of mother Bucher.
Gard's good nature battled with his sense of balance and eventually won out through a chivalrous act of generosity. It would be a shame to deny the ladies what they had been looking forward to, even though his own hopes were already tarnished. He would stoop low enough to overlook Frau's ungraciousness. He went into town to see if the change would be suitable for his invited friend. Anderson bravely stepped up and silently accepted the responsibility of occasionally walking around the ballroom with his arm awkwardly around the plump form of Mother Bucher.
When Gard got back to Villa Elsa, another stilted letter with a new programme was awaiting him. It had developed that the Von Tielitzes could come, though the sister was slightly indisposed. It would be nice for all to form a party, and Frau Bucher would be so pleased if Herr Kirtley would have them joined in. But transportation to and fro must be provided because of the sister. He had so kindly, at first, spoken of a motor.
When Gard returned to Villa Elsa, he found another formal letter with a new plan waiting for him. It turned out that the Von Tielitzes could come, although the sister was a bit unwell. It would be nice for everyone to get together, and Frau Bucher would be very happy if Herr Kirtley could arrange for them to join in. However, transportation to and from must be provided because of the sister. He had kindly mentioned a car at first.
[185]As Friedrich had admittedly no money, Gard saw that this was a project—likely on the part of both—to saddle him with the whole expense. The clumsy maneuvering had got down to bargaining. He was mad. He sent the scullery courier back definitely withdrawing all arrangements. The pleasure of his invited guest could not be complicated. Result, the Von Tielitzes did not appear, mother and daughter Bucher remained at home, and Kirtley went with Anderson.
[185]Since Friedrich clearly had no money, Gard realized that this was a plan—probably from both sides—to make him cover all the costs. The awkward negotiations had turned into a back-and-forth. He was furious. He sent the kitchen messenger back to officially cancel all arrangements. The enjoyment of his guest couldn't be jeopardized. As a result, the Von Tielitzes didn’t show up, mother and daughter Bucher stayed home, and Kirtley went with Anderson.
CHAPTER XXIV
The Court Gala
THE two sat the night out in the box. The reader is familiar with Thackeray's amusing references to the stuffy German Court balls. After his day and under the sway of the Empire, they had broadened and aired out somewhat in their automaton grandeurs.
THE two sat the night out in the box. The reader is familiar with Thackeray's humorous comments about the pretentious German Court balls. After his day and influenced by the Empire, they had become a bit more relaxed and less rigid in their pompous displays.
Precisely at nine o'clock the Saxon Court entered, so far as possible in battle array, and unlimbered to a slight extent before their revering subjects. No one knew of anything this Royal family had ever said, commented Anderson. None of them had done anything original or brilliant except Louise, who had run off with the tutor. She could not stand the dullness here any longer. And the members of this Court represented civilization raised to the famous nth power!
At exactly nine o'clock, the Saxon Court arrived, arranged as much as possible like they were ready for battle, and unlimbered slightly in front of their respectful subjects. No one could recall anything this royal family had ever said, Anderson remarked. None of them had done anything original or impressive except Louise, who had eloped with the tutor. She couldn’t take the boredom here any longer. And the members of this Court were the epitome of civilization multiplied to the famous nth power!
How commonplace, uninspiring, they did look to Kirtley! As Germans can illy take on[187] polish he thought he only beheld Rudolphs and Teklas jammed into court dress. The disenchantment of a medieval dynasty at near view!
How ordinary and dull they looked to Kirtley! Just as Germans struggle to add polish, he felt like he was only seeing Rudolphs and Teklas stuffed into formal outfits. The disappointment of a medieval dynasty up close!
After the midnight supper Anderson, refreshed, told of an illuminating book he might write on Germany with journalistic brevity and conciseness. It would run something like this:
After the midnight dinner, Anderson, feeling recharged, talked about a powerful book he could write on Germany with journalistic clarity and brevity. It would go something like this:
Chapter on Gentlemen and Ladies.
There are few gentlemen and ladies in Germany.
Chapter on Manners.
There are no manners in Germany. Only orders and servility.
Chapter on Charm and Delicacy.
No specimens to be found.
Chapter on the Milk of Human Kindness.
There is no milk of human kindness in Germany.
Chapter on the Absence of Arrogance.
There is no absence of arrogance in Germany.
Chapter on Gentlemen and Ladies.
There are few gentlemen and ladies in Germany.
Chapter on Manners.
There are no manners in Germany. Only commands and submission.
Chapter on Charm and Delicacy.
No examples to be found.
Chapter on the Milk of Human Kindness.
There is no milk of human kindness in Germany.
Chapter on the Absence of Arrogance.
There is no lack of arrogance in Germany.
And so forth. What did Kirtley think of it?
And so on. What did Kirtley think about it?
The journalist jestingly identified the dignitaries, the men about town, the titled ladies about whose bulbous red shoulders often hung scandal, and retailed other gossip from his newspaper files. The scene indeed scintillated with lights and diamonds and[188] crystal. Two orchestras answered each other in a continuous strain of conquering music. Swords and spurs clanked and clattered through the riotous German dances, adding their martial clangor to the regal sounds. Trains were stepped on, dresses torn. The retiring rooms were often sought for repairs. Now and again commotion was caused by some heavy person tripping on her skirts and crashing to the floor. It was Triumphant Germany celebrating her undisputed position and pride—celebrating her mastery of the universe.
The journalist jokingly pointed out the important guests, the local gentlemen, and the high-society ladies, who often had scandals swirling around their plump red shoulders, sharing other gossip from his newspaper archives. The scene sparkled with lights and diamonds and[188] crystal. Two orchestras took turns playing a continuous stream of triumphant music. Swords and spurs rattled and clattered through the lively German dances, adding their bold sounds to the majestic melodies. Dresses got stepped on and torn. The lounges were frequently used for quick fixes. Now and then, a scene erupted when someone heavy tripped over her skirts and fell to the ground. It was Triumphant Germany celebrating her unchallenged status and pride—celebrating her dominance in the world.
Gard really longed at moments to be actively throbbing with it all, circling in the throng, and holding Elsa with her blond florescence in his arms. Then a certain contentment would possess him as he pictured her mother forced to stay home with blighted hankerings. What a ridiculous appearance he would have presented towing her around here in a waltz before all these florid and grandiose figures of state!
Gard really wanted, at times, to be fully immersed in everything, mingling with the crowd and holding Elsa, with her beautiful blonde hair, in his arms. In those moments, he felt a certain satisfaction imagining her mother stuck at home, suffering with unfulfilled desires. He would have looked so ridiculous parading her around in a waltz in front of all these flashy and impressive figures of authority!
Kirtley's disposition was somewhat slow-going, sure-footed. He had a gentle or quiet conservative tenacity that so often comes with[189] the inheritance of a moderate income. It at least gave him time to look things deliberately in the face.
Kirtley was a bit slow-moving, but steady. He had a calm, quietly stubborn determination that's often associated with inheriting a stable income. It allowed him to take his time and consider things thoughtfully.
He had at first discounted heavily his old friend's pyrotechnic, cynical bill of complaints against the Teutons and Teutonism. It was diverting, salient, but therefore discouraging to credence. Such judgments were apt to be flashes in the pan. They startled but lacked rootage. Gard had not sufficiently taken into consideration that the journalist was speaking at the end of seven years in Germany instead of at the beginning. When one arrives in a country, extreme snap-shot impressions readily flare forth in the mind.
He initially dismissed his old friend's dramatic, cynical list of complaints about the Germans and German culture. It was entertaining and striking, but ultimately hard to believe. Those kinds of judgments tended to be superficial. They grabbed attention but didn’t have much depth. Gard hadn’t fully considered that the journalist was talking after seven years in Germany rather than at the start. When you first arrive in a country, intense first impressions can easily overwhelm your thoughts.
Yet the more Kirtley saw, the more did he turn toward the same divorced mental attitude. He realized how truly the typical Villa Elsa, though in quite a different key, justified Anderson's conclusions. The performance Frau Bucher had gone through verified another variant in racial traits—a variant which Anderson had stressed.
Yet the more Kirtley saw, the more he leaned into the same detached mindset. He understood how accurately the typical Villa Elsa, though in a different way, supported Anderson's conclusions. The performance that Frau Bucher had gone through confirmed another variation in racial traits—a variation that Anderson had emphasized.
Namely, one must be forcible, even harsh, with a German. He does not respond satisfactorily to kindness, leniency, liberality. Little sunny courtesies, unselfishnesses, genial en[190]deavors, do not characteristically illuminate the tenebrous interior of his consciousness. He misinterprets them as feeblenesses, as confessions of his dominating rights and privileges. The more one grants to him, the more one yields to him, the more advantage and aggressive advantage he assumes he is invited to take. To go out of one's way to be obliging, to attempt to ingratiate one's self, brings difficulties.
Namely, you have to be firm, even tough, with a German. He doesn't react well to kindness, leniency, or generosity. Small acts of kindness, selflessness, and friendly efforts don’t really light up the dark corners of his mind. He sees them as signs of weakness, as admissions of his power and privileges. The more you give in to him, the more he believes he can take advantage of the situation. Trying too hard to be accommodating or to win him over can lead to problems.
But stout decision, sternness, defiant ultimatums, win out with him. As long as Gard had tried to make himself agreeable in the affair of the Court ball, his efforts were misunderstood and he became a handball buffeted about for the superior convenience of others. As soon as he finally stiffened up and mentally told them to go to perdition, the ingrowing troubles ceased with disciplined promptness. A satisfactory relation resulted, and a hearty respect for him in the household, he recognized, was measureably and contentedly increased.
But strong determination, seriousness, and defiant ultimatums worked for him. As long as Gard tried to be agreeable about the Court ball, his efforts were misinterpreted, and he felt like a handball being tossed around for the convenience of others. As soon as he finally stood firm and mentally told them to go to hell, the ongoing issues stopped immediately. A good relationship developed, and he noticed an increase in respect for him in the household, which made him feel satisfied.
It was a little different phase of the old pagan German tribal habit of considering the outsider as one from whom all should be got that was possible, irrespective of return in[191] kind or a decent proportion of benefits. To hear in hard, to gouge, are toward the foreigner procedures relied on by the Teuton nature as appropriate. In it there is to be found little mutuality or respectfulness of feeling that curbs, not to speak of the social spirit that restrains or breeds a fine dignity of self. A show of weakness in any form, however ideal or beautiful, makes small appeal. So far as any other "tribe" is concerned, life to the German is at base a knock-down argument. Misfortunes in an alien land do not awaken sympathy. They are rather to be regarded as windfalls, as a result of which a profit is to be grabbed or a steely hand of control inserted where it does not belong.
It was a slightly different phase of the old pagan German tribal mindset of seeing outsiders as people from whom everything possible should be taken, regardless of any return in kind or a fair share of benefits. To hear no, to take advantage, are attitudes the Germans have traditionally relied on when dealing with foreigners. In this mindset, there's little sense of mutuality or respectful feeling that would hold back behavior, let alone the social spirit that promotes dignity. Any form of weakness, no matter how ideal or beautiful, carries little appeal. As far as any other "tribe" is concerned, life for the Germans is fundamentally about winning at all costs. Hardships in a foreign land do not inspire sympathy. Instead, they are seen as opportunities, chances to seize profit or assert control where it isn't warranted.
CHAPTER XXV
Fritzi and Another Chat
WHEN Jim Deming returned he resumed sway over Villa Elsa, though with less vehemence. The Buchers fell promptly again under his spell, the duos were dropped, and Gard retired into the attic for study, varying its monotony with sojourns in town to familiarize himself with the personal peculiarities of the German multitude.
WHEN Jim Deming came back, he took charge of Villa Elsa again, but with less intensity. The Buchers quickly fell under his influence again, the pairings were abandoned, and Gard went up to the attic to study, breaking up the routine with trips to town to get to know the unique characteristics of the German crowd.
During the long break-up of winter, when the Teuton skies were leaden, and it was neither cold enough nor hot enough to stay comfortably in his room, owing to the Bucher economy of heat in this mid-season, it was pleasanter to be stirring about en ville, and, when weary of this, seeking the agreeable cosiness of the cafés with their warmth of cooking and beverages that thawed one out. He usually lunched in some one of these well-[193]known resorts where he became acquainted with the personnel and frequenters. It was Deming who introduced him to the inn where Fritzi served, whom Von Tielitz and Messer had urged upon Gard's attentions. Jim had learned of it through the former.
During the long winter break, when the skies were gray and it was neither cold nor warm enough to feel comfy in his room because of the way heat was managed during this transition season, it was nicer to be out and about in the city. When he grew tired of that, he’d look for the cozy atmosphere of the cafés filled with warm food and drinks that helped him feel recharged. He usually had lunch at one of these popular spots where he got to know the staff and regulars. It was Deming who showed him the inn where Fritzi worked, the one Von Tielitz and Messer had recommended to Gard. Jim had learned about it from Deming.
Imagine the tiniest of restaurants. It was scarcely large enough for six small tables. The miniature kitchen immediately adjoined this dining nook, so that these two rooms were in effect one. When the two young Americans first went there together, a very comely girl sat cutting colored papers into fantastic shapes with the apparent intention of having more floral decorations. For huge artificial bouquets decked the boards. The place was freshly painted and engagingly clean. The very low walls were covered with queer mottoes in grotesque Gothic script, with Meissen wares, Vienna glass, and also misshapen oddities that always interest the puerile part of mature German nature.
Imagine the tiniest restaurant. It was barely big enough for six small tables. The tiny kitchen was right next to this dining area, making the two spaces practically one. When the two young Americans first visited together, a very pretty girl was cutting colorful papers into fantastic shapes, seemingly to create more floral decorations. Huge artificial bouquets filled the tables. The place was freshly painted and charmingly clean. The very low walls were covered with quirky slogans in exaggerated Gothic script, along with Meissen ceramics, Vienna glass, and also oddly shaped items that always catch the interest of the youthful side of mature German nature.
There was a bust of the Emperor covered with ivy and flower concoctions in cardboard. The coat of arms of Saxony embellished the ceiling which one could almost touch with the upraised hand. A cat and a dog were[194] taking their noon-day nap. Sausages and cake in the form of the ever-popular Lebkuchen were made a specialty of here, and when Fritzi—for this was Fritzi—had served the young men she took a seat companionably by them, as became her rôle.
There was a bust of the Emperor covered in ivy and floral arrangements made from cardboard. The coat of arms of Saxony decorated the ceiling, which you could almost touch with an outstretched hand. A cat and a dog were[194] taking their afternoon nap. Sausages and cake in the shape of the ever-popular Lebkuchen were the specialties here, and when Fritzi—for that was her name—had served the young men, she sat down next to them, as was her role.
She had a rustic beauty and was sound and plump as a cherry. Her peasant headdress was high and elaborate, winged with chicken feathers, and her short skirts gave way before white stockings pulpily emerging from painted wooden shoes which clicked over the dull tiled floor.
She had a charming, natural beauty and was healthy and full-figured like a ripe cherry. Her peasant-style headdress was tall and intricate, adorned with chicken feathers, and her short skirts flared out over white stockings that softly peeked from under her painted wooden shoes, which clicked on the dull tiled floor.
By the table she knitted, watching the eating solicitously, and was by turns candid, sociable and saucy as a spoiled child. It was her business not to be affronted by familiar remarks and actions. She was there to draw trade. She knew how to drop quick curtsies in response to compliments and tips. Although Deming acted freely toward her like an old acquaintance, he could not make much headway owing to the bar of language—her jargon of dialect.
By the table she knitted, keeping an eye on the eating closely, and she was sometimes straightforward, friendly, and cheeky like a spoiled kid. Her job was not to take offense at familiar comments and behaviors. She was there to attract business. She knew how to quickly bow in response to compliments and tips. Although Deming interacted with her like an old friend, he couldn't get very far because of the barrier of language—her dialect.
Gard, when touched with loneliness, went there several times and struck up quite an intimacy with her, the proprietor and his wife.[195] It was a snug spot and she was picturesque. The Lebkuchen and famous sausages, which would have been a deadly combination in America, seemed to agree with him, soothed with beer. While Fritzi appeared keck at intervals, Gard did not see any excuse for agreeing with the scandalous hints Von Tielitz and Messer threw out about her. They would naturally see the wench in every domestic.
Gard, feeling lonely, visited several times and formed a close friendship with the owner and his wife.[195] It was a cozy place and she was charming. The Lebkuchen and famous sausages, which would have been a disastrous mix in America, seemed to sit well with him, especially with some beer. While Fritzi seemed a bit quirky at times, Gard saw no reason to agree with the scandalous insinuations that Von Tielitz and Messer made about her. They would naturally suspect a girl of mischief in every female servant.
It was from the inn that Kirtley frequently went to Anderson's for the afternoon. Gard had found it desirable to write down in a notebook some of the facts and reflections he was accumulating on the subject of the German. He would want to show them to his old tutor when home was reached again. Among them, Anderson's ideas and comments were included, flanked by an occasional apothegm.
It was from the inn that Kirtley often headed to Anderson's in the afternoon. Gard had found it helpful to jot down in a notebook some of the facts and thoughts he was gathering about the German. He planned to share them with his old tutor when he got back home. Included among these were Anderson's ideas and comments, along with an occasional saying.
Gard copied off a sample of their many talks in somewhat the abridged form as given below. It was when, on one of these days, Kirtley learned that Anderson had moved, and traced him to his new abode. From the window of this apartment they could see, through the bleary March light, the dowager-like Grosse Garten where Deming paraded in style with Frau Bucher and Fräulein. Al[196]though the trees and shrubbery were now so gaunt and chilly of aspect, soon they would be green and gay with beautiful spring, and Anderson would find them cheering.
Gard took a sample of their many conversations and condensed it into the form below. It was during one of these days that Kirtley discovered Anderson had moved and tracked him to his new home. From the window of this apartment, they could see, through the dull March light, the stately Grosse Garten where Deming strolled elegantly with Frau Bucher and Fräulein. Although the trees and shrubs looked so bare and cold right now, they would soon be lush and vibrant with beautiful spring, and Anderson would find them uplifting.
"I am getting old," he said. "I have never wanted May to hurry up so much as this year. Here I can get a good view and the birds will come and nest in these branches. They will whistle to me. I can fill my pocket with crumbs and go out and make their acquaintance in the sunshine and flowers. Since the war failed me again, I can see that my friends pull away from me. They doubtless think that no one is more worthless than a prophet who cannot pull off his 'stunt' and has short gray hair in the bargain. Everyone is blissfully lolling in the embraces of enduring tranquillity and I am seeking the companionship of trees and birds that are not troubled with the machinations and delusions of mankind.
"I am getting old," he said. "I've never wanted May to arrive as much as I do this year. From here, I have a great view, and the birds will come and nest in these branches. They'll sing to me. I can fill my pocket with crumbs and go out to meet them in the sunshine and flowers. Ever since the war let me down again, I've noticed my friends distancing themselves. They probably think no one is more useless than a prophet who can't deliver his 'act' and has short gray hair to top it off. Everyone else is happily enjoying a lasting peace, while I'm looking for the company of trees and birds that aren't bothered by the schemes and illusions of humanity."
"So there will be this delightful summer of 1914 ahead. Christian civilization is spreading rapidly everywhere. More Bibles being sold than ever. More Hottentots and cannibals wearing clothes and losing their taste for human flesh. And so universal Peace has come to stay. There will not be another war.
"So there will be this wonderful summer of 1914 ahead. Christian civilization is spreading quickly everywhere. More Bibles are being sold than ever before. More Hottentots and cannibals are wearing clothes and losing their taste for human flesh. And so universal Peace is here to stay. There won't be another war."
[197]"And yet the Dresden barracks were never so full of soldiers, and the German bases of military supplies are crammed. The munition factories are running on extra-time schedules. Has the world turned topsy-turvy or have I? Does what one actually see and hear have no meaning any more?"
[197]"And yet the Dresden barracks have never been so full of soldiers, and the German military supply bases are overflowing. The munitions factories are working overtime. Has the world turned upside down, or have I? Does what we actually see and hear even matter anymore?"
"Why do you stay in Germany?" asked Gard. "The Germans antagonize you. And you look upon their Government as a wicked monster prepared to leap upon its innocent prey?"
"Why are you still in Germany?" Gard asked. "The Germans treat you badly. And you see their government as an evil creature ready to pounce on its innocent victims?"
"For about the same reasons that you remain at the Buchers'. Because it's so often exasperating here. And that's always exciting. I guess it's the Irish strain in us. Want to stick around where there's a good prospect for trouble—want something to swear at. And I consider it my duty to remain here as a sign post of warning. I am carrying about a small red flag with DANGER on it. If the Germans win command of the world, I will be here on the ground all ready to start in as a German and will have a great advantage over nearly all Yankees. I have conned my green book of irregular verbs, which I think would bother most of them considerably. I[198] have got accustomed to the German eating and drinking which I imagine would prove the death of most of them, too. I have learned to sleep athwart the German bed—no small feat, as you know. For everything must become Germanized under German rule. Teutons know no other method."
"For pretty much the same reasons you stay at the Buchers'. Because it can be so frustrating here. And that’s always exciting. I guess it’s the Irish side of us. We want to hang around where there’s a good chance of trouble—want something to vent about. And I see it as my responsibility to stay here as a warning sign. I’m carrying a small red flag with DANGER on it. If the Germans take over the world, I’ll be ready to jump in as a German and will have a big advantage over almost all Americans. I’ve memorized my green book of irregular verbs, which I think would throw most of them off. I’ve gotten used to the German way of eating and drinking, which I imagine would be a shock to most of them, too. I've learned to sleep across a German bed—no easy task, as you know. Because everything has to become Germanized under German control. Teutons know no other way."
"Is that the meaning of the sort of happy, triumphant feeling that one finds in Germany? It seems to pervade the whole Empire—rich and poor, merchant and peasant, housewife and children."
"Is that the meaning of the kind of happy, triumphant feeling that you find in Germany? It seems to spread throughout the entire Empire—rich and poor, merchant and peasant, housewife and children."
"Yes, because they know a victorious war is coming and they will all be lords and masters. The Empire will stretch out wide and there will be work at the highest wages and plenty of money. The German will be able to travel on his own railroads throughout most of Europe and Turkey. No matter how servile he may be at home, everyone will kowtow to him abroad.
"Yes, because they know a winning war is on the way and they will all be lords and masters. The Empire will expand greatly, providing jobs at high wages and lots of money. The German will be able to travel on his own railroads across most of Europe and Turkey. No matter how subordinate he may be at home, everyone will bow to him abroad."
"It will be a short, decisive campaign. It will cost some blood and some treasure, but then—the German millennium! The people a eager, ripe, fit for it. The coveted Government jobs will be more numerous and remunerative. They will confer more power on the[199] incumbents, for they will be largely connected with conquered provinces. The German Michel will be no longer cramped up in his mid-continent."...
"It will be a quick and decisive campaign. It will require some sacrifice and resources, but then— the German millennium! The people are eager and ready for it. The sought-after government positions will be more plentiful and better paid. They will give more power to the[199] holders, as they will mostly be linked to conquered territories. The German Michel will no longer be restricted in his mid-continent."
CHAPTER XXVI
Some of the Less Known Efficiency
WHY is it that this seems to be a nation of professionals while ours seems to be a nation of amateurs? I suppose it is, of course, because of the more general spread here of thorough instruction."
WHY does it feel like this country is filled with professionals while ours is made up of amateurs? I guess it's because there's a wider availability of quality education here.
"Yes, with us unskilled mediocrity is the popular level because it is within the reach of everyone in a democracy. With the German, high skilled, highly instructed efficiency is the ideal. The failure of America to rise into the expert level is due to our unenforced higher education. We compel our people to have a common school education in order to preserve the Republic. Its voters must know how to read and write and 'figger' or they won't be able to vote intelligently.
"Yes, with us, unskilled mediocrity is the popular standard because it's accessible to everyone in a democracy. In Germany, high skill and advanced efficiency are the ideals. America's inability to reach an expert level is due to our lack of enforced higher education. We require our citizens to have a basic school education to maintain the Republic. Its voters must be able to read, write, and do basic math; otherwise, they won't be able to vote wisely."
"Now if we did in addition what Germany does, we would insist, as far as practicable, on advanced education or instruction in every[201] family. Then we, too, would have a wealth of trained talent. Comparing the riches and population of the two countries there is a much greater proportion of university men and other competently instructed men in Germany. Only relatively few Americans can show diplomas for genuine and severe mental training. Take your own Bucher family as an illustration. All its men will have sheepskins that are worth while to show. With us, out of such a family none would have a sheepskin, or at most one. One of the boys might have gone to a university. And as for the difference in the women—little comparison. Your Frau, as you have told me, has several framed diplomas to her credit.
"Now, if we also did what Germany does, we would push for advanced education or training in every[201] family. Then we, too, would have a wealth of skilled talent. When comparing the wealth and population of the two countries, Germany has a much higher percentage of university graduates and other well-educated individuals. Only a relatively small number of Americans can boast diplomas from rigorous and serious educational programs. Take your own Bucher family as an example. Every man there will have degrees that are worth showing. In our case, from such a family, none would have a degree, or at most one. One of the boys might have attended university. And the difference among the women—there’s barely any comparison. Your wife, as you’ve shared with me, has several framed diplomas to her name."
"You can see what a tremendous advantage all this gives the German people over us. You have hit it very well—we are nearly always amateurs. They are nearly always able to be professionals."
"You can see how much of an advantage all this gives the German people over us. You've hit the nail on the head—we are almost always amateurs. They are almost always able to be professionals."
"Is it the same with the laboring classes—the mechanics and all that?"
"Is it the same with the working class—the mechanics and all that?"
"The same is true, in its way. A poor American boy thinks he will like to be a machinist. He gets a job as a new hand on a salary. He works at it a couple of years. Then somebody[202] offers him ten dollars a week more to drive a truck, which is a simple, elementary task. He drops his machinist career for this. He gets more money and it requires no tedious training. So he remains an indifferent mechanic. It's the money he's looking for, not the satisfaction of proficiency in a skilled trade.
"The same is true in its own way. A poor American boy thinks he would like to be a machinist. He gets a job as a beginner with a salary. He works at it for a couple of years. Then someone[202] offers him ten dollars a week more to drive a truck, which is an easy, straightforward job. He gives up his machinist career for this. He makes more money and it doesn’t require any tedious training. So he stays an average mechanic. He’s after the money, not the satisfaction of being good at a skilled trade."
"Now, by contrast, the future of the poor German child is decided in a fashion at about the age of ten. When a boy is elected to go into industry, for instance, he is apprenticed at about fourteen for, say, four years to be a mechanic. He is given no wages. In fact he has to pay something, very often, for the opportunity to learn. But he must, at the same time, attend what they call here continuing schools. It is these schools, which we do not have in America, that hold him fixed to his line of work—prevent him from jumping from one kind of thing to another. He not only works in the shop but is forced to go to a continuing school.
"Now, in contrast, the future of a poor German child is typically decided around the age of ten. When a boy is chosen to enter a trade, for example, he starts his apprenticeship at about fourteen, usually lasting four years to become a mechanic. He doesn’t earn any wages; in fact, he often has to pay something for the chance to learn. At the same time, he has to attend what are known here as continuing schools. These schools, which we don’t have in America, keep him focused on his line of work and prevent him from switching from one field to another. He not only works in the shop but is also required to go to a continuing school."
"Hence at eighteen the German factory and Government are sure to find in him just the kind of instructed worker they need. There has never been any danger of his meanwhile[203] changing to driving a truck. He sticks to his trade through life. He becomes a master mechanic. You can't lure him away into an unskilled channel by more money. It's not the money alone he is thinking of. It is also the pride of having a specific calling that lifts him out of the great commonplace market of untrained labor. So Germany is full of competent mechanical men while we limp along with our huge supply of the partly experienced. Every such German knows how to do at least one thing as well as and usually better than anyone else.
"Hence at eighteen, the German factory and government can count on finding in him exactly the kind of skilled worker they need. There’s never been a risk of him switching to driving a truck in the meantime[203]. He sticks to his trade for life. He becomes a master mechanic. You can’t tempt him away into an unskilled job with more money. It’s not just about the money for him. It’s also the pride of having a specific profession that sets him apart from the vast pool of untrained labor. So Germany is filled with skilled mechanics, while we struggle along with our large number of partly experienced workers. Every German knows how to do at least one thing as well as, and usually better than, anyone else."
"This is one big reason why Germany is pushing ahead of every nation in the industrial world and one reason why I fear her. No matter what she wants to do, she has an abundance of efficient brain and muscle right at hand with which to do it well and at once. In our great United States the lack of this is the bane of American industry and development, and causes such immense and continual loss in time and money because of our having to deal with such a mass of inexperienced young workmen.
"This is one big reason why Germany is ahead of every country in the industrial world and one reason why I’m worried about her. No matter what she wants to accomplish, she has plenty of skilled brains and hands ready to get it done effectively and immediately. In our great United States, the lack of this is the downfall of American industry and progress, leading to huge and ongoing losses in time and money because we have to work with so many inexperienced young workers."
"But more than this. The German who is taught a trade acquires not only the technic of[204] it in a shop or laboratory, but also acquires in his studies something of an enlightening and inspiring knowledge of its history and significance. He is, consequently, much more than a mere drudge. He is made intelligent about his calling. This particular feature, so pregnant and valuable, is not incorporated in the American plan, if we can be said to have a plan in these matters. For the Yankee ambition is to make plenty of money in any quick way, and therefore to rise above a trade which a German is content to remain in. We feel no keen necessity about careful instruction in such vocations. Luck, "pull," "cheek," mere cleverness, are prominently relied on in its stead.
"But more than that. The German who learns a trade gains not only the skills from[204] working in a shop or laboratory, but also picks up some enlightening and inspiring knowledge about its history and importance through his studies. As a result, he becomes much more than just a laborer. He becomes knowledgeable about his profession. This particular aspect, so meaningful and valuable, is not included in the American approach, if we can even say we have a system in this area. The American ambition is to make a lot of money quickly and to move beyond a trade that a German is happy to stay in. We don’t feel a strong need for thorough training in these jobs. Instead, we mostly rely on luck, connections, charm, and basic cleverness."
"There is another thing in this trade instruction that we do not have in any noticeable degree. It teaches the German mechanic to become wedded to his Nation and Government. He is made to realize the great benefits and responsibilities he owes to them. He becomes an integral national citizen ready to serve his homeland. He is taught to think of something higher than his pay envelope. Under our system such a mechanic grows up loosely connected in thought and acts with the[205] governing public under which he enjoys all his liberty and opportunity. In so far as national necessities go he is apt to be a weakened unit or pulling the wrong way. Unlike the German, he has been educated to have no self-sacrificing ideal of state or country."
"There’s one more thing in this training that we don’t have to a significant extent. It teaches the German worker to be committed to his nation and government. He learns about the great benefits and responsibilities he has towards them. He becomes a vital part of the nation, ready to serve his country. He is encouraged to think about something more important than just his paycheck. In our system, such a worker grows up loosely connected in thought and acts with the[205] governing public that grants him all his freedom and opportunities. When it comes to national needs, he tends to be a weaker unit or moving in the wrong direction. Unlike the German, he hasn’t been taught to have a self-sacrificing ideal for the state or country."
Anderson had, at one time, drawn Gard's attention to the immense advantage Germany uniquely derived by completely organizing and keeping at work that vast majority of incurable mediocrities—mere plodders—who are found in every race and who often weigh down its destiny to the point of sinking hopelessness.
Anderson had, at one point, pointed out to Gard the huge advantage Germany gained by fully organizing and utilizing that vast majority of hopeless mediocrities—just hard workers—who exist in every race and often drag down its fate to the brink of despair.
Kirtley had since observed that one conspicuous German method was largely to employ this empty talent in small Government jobs. In general, these tasks seemed to be expressly for the swarming and uninspired nonentities, and meant most trivial duties for trivial pay. But such tasks kept this population occupied, orderly and more than self-respecting. In America incurable mediocrity is left to shift for itself in huge masses.
Kirtley had noticed that one obvious German approach was to use this untapped talent for small government jobs. Overall, these roles appeared to be specifically for the countless uninspired individuals, involving mostly trivial duties for minimal pay. However, such jobs kept these people busy, organized, and more than just self-respecting. In America, chronic mediocrity is left to fend for itself in large groups.
The natural ambition of a Teuton was to be in the national service. Rare was the German family who had not one member in "Govern[206]ment circles." Or if not, it was building expectations toward such a future. One in every eight wage-earning men a bureaucrat! It was not only a question of the salary, assured if small, but the honor. Any Government clerk or roustabout, not to speak of functionaries in higher duties, was looked up to in a way unfamiliar in America, for under that continuous régime his position remained fixed for life. Government officials and employees in the United States are quite freely thrown out under the frequent election upheavals and may to-morrow be ordinary citizens bereft of any sort of authority over their fellows. So they enjoy only a passing deference.
The natural ambition of a German was to be in public service. It was rare to find a German family without at least one member involved in "Government circles." If not, they were usually hoping for that future. One in every eight working men was a bureaucrat! It wasn't just about the salary, which was stable even if small, but also about the honor. Any government clerk or laborer, especially those in higher positions, was respected in a way that felt unfamiliar in America because their job security was guaranteed for life. In the United States, government officials and employees can easily be removed during election cycles and may find themselves ordinary citizens without any authority over others the next day. So, they only receive a temporary respect.
In Germany, owing to the use of plodders who made up extensively its ubiquitous and commanding official class, this bureaucratic scheme proved useful in more ways than one. It put faith and expectation into these stolid, menial lives and took them out of the ranks of the idle and discontented dullards who, in other countries, are a source of danger or decay. It attached Fritz firmly and loyally to the Nation. It held the links between the ruling caste and the people hard and tight. At the same time it tied his family and friends[207] to the Hohenzollern, uniting them in a bond almost servile. The ever-swelling ranks of bureaucrats, in such a large measure imbecile and applying themselves to imbecile occupations, strengthened the incomparable solidarity of the race. And it was this army of State employees who were actively helping diffuse through Germany in 1913 the frothy ideas of a national triumph that intoxicated the populace.
In Germany, due to the reliance on workers who made up its widespread and powerful official class, this bureaucratic system proved beneficial in several ways. It instilled faith and hope into these steady, everyday lives and removed them from the ranks of the idle and discontented people who, in other countries, pose a risk or lead to decline. It firmly and loyally connected Fritz to the Nation. It kept the ties between the ruling class and the people strong and tight. At the same time, it linked his family and friends[207] to the Hohenzollern, creating a bond that was almost servile. The ever-growing ranks of bureaucrats, many of whom were inept and engaged in mindless jobs, reinforced the unique solidarity of the race. And it was this army of State employees who were actively spreading through Germany in 1913 the exciting ideas of national glory that captivated the populace.
But Kirtley, admiring this manifestation of practical and administrative wisdom, felt that there must be somewhere a tremendous weak spot. The expense of this plan and its withdrawal of muscle and even poor brain from directly productive channels, were costly. And there was about it a pompous vacancy, an arrogant nonsensicalness, a latent peril resulting from such a large number of automatons in unquestioned positions, that should all logically indicate this: If Germany once broke, it would collapse somewhat like an eggshell. It would be a formidable eggshell but with a content surprisingly void.
But Kirtley, appreciating this display of practical and administrative wisdom, sensed that there had to be a significant weak point somewhere. The cost of this plan and its diversion of manpower and even lesser intellect from directly productive efforts were expensive. There was an air of pompous emptiness about it, an arrogant absurdity, and a hidden danger stemming from so many automatons in unquestioned roles, which should all clearly suggest this: If Germany were to ever break, it would crumble like an eggshell. It would be a formidable eggshell, but with a surprisingly empty inside.
In a sentence, the mighty German bureaucracy kept the population from thinking. It meant—Obey and make no inquiry! And[208] where in history, Gard asked himself, has a nation of such political and body slaves endured as against nations where the common individual was free to ask questions? Slavery in any important form is acknowledged to be an outworn, decadent economic policy. It cannot compete in the long run.
In short, the powerful German bureaucracy stopped the people from thinking. It meant—Follow orders and don’t ask questions! And[208] when in history, Gard wondered, has a nation of such political and physical slaves lasted when compared to nations where individuals were free to ask questions? Slavery in any significant form is recognized as an outdated, failing economic strategy. It can't hold up over time.
As a result of this bureaucratic domination in Germany there were, as Kirtley observed, many aspects of the organized public life so excessively worked out and applied in their development as to be unbelievable to Americans who had not come in actual contact with them. These logical extremes and exhaustive minutiæ often enough combined a ferocious ostentation and comical absurdness that were so little realized by those afar who learned of the mighty seriousness and intelligence of the Germans merely from the printed page. The conduct and operations of the limitless bureaucracy were usually the form in which the foreigner in the flesh ran counter to this unconscionable discipline.
As a result of bureaucratic control in Germany, there were, as Kirtley pointed out, many aspects of organized public life that were so meticulously developed and implemented that they seemed unbelievable to Americans who hadn’t experienced them firsthand. These logical extremes and detailed minutiae often combined a fierce showiness with a comical absurdity that was barely recognized by those far away, who only learned about the serious nature and intelligence of the Germans through written text. The behavior and actions of the vast bureaucracy were typically the way in which foreigners directly encountered this overwhelming discipline.
Of all this Government routine, the spy system stood out in relief, although, at the same time, it was so dovetailed into the civil administration as to be frequently indistin[209]guishable. Like a typical Yankee Gard, always greatly impressed by the general emphasis everywhere laid on the perfection of the Germans and their methods in everything, had regarded Anderson's remarks and hints about the spy régime as exaggerations. He still could not believe that Rudolph was a kind of Government sleuth or that Teuton existence was honeycombed from cellar to roof with official suspicion and the tyranny of the detective.
Of all the government routines, the spy system really stood out, even though it was so intertwined with the civil administration that it was often hard to tell them apart. Like a typical Yankee, Gard was always struck by how much people praised the efficiency of the Germans and their methods. He had viewed Anderson's comments and suggestions about the spy regime as exaggerations. He still couldn't believe that Rudolph was some sort of government detective or that German life was filled with official suspicion and the oppression of the police.
But this phase was now brought within range of his personal knowledge, and he had a glimpse of this famous German service. And through whom? Of all persons, Jim Deming. Strange to relate, it brought to a sudden head the latter's stirring courtship of Fräulein Elsa.
But this phase was now within his personal experience, and he caught a glimpse of this famous German service. And through whom? Of all people, Jim Deming. Oddly enough, it suddenly intensified Jim's passionate pursuit of Fräulein Elsa.
CHAPTER XXVII
The Imperial Secret Agency
AFTER New Year he had organized a little informal dancing club among the Americans. He called it the Cinderella Cotillion Coterie, in alliterative compliment to the daintiness of the ladies. He was the self-constituted secretary and sole official.
AFTER New Year, he set up a small, casual dance club for the Americans. He named it the Cinderella Cotillion Coterie, as a playful nod to the charm of the ladies. He took it upon himself to be the secretary and the only official.
For the birthday of the Father of our country he sent out to the members a rollicking printed invitation reading:
For the birthday of the Father of our country, he sent out a fun printed invitation to the members that said:
In honor of our George's birthday, which comes as usual this year on February the twenty-second, the inimitable CCCs will hold one of their regular reunions in pumps, beginning punctually at nine. Full beer orchestra as usual. No flowers or singing of hymns.
In celebration of George's birthday, which falls on February 22nd this year as always, the unique CCCs will host one of their regular gatherings in formal attire, starting promptly at nine. Full beer orchestra as usual. No flowers or singing of hymns.
By order
By order
James Alexander Deming, Sec., CCC.
James Alexander Deming, Secretary, CCC.
R. S. V. P.—the Senate and the Roman People.
R. S. V. P.—the Senate and the Roman People.
The notice at least gave evidence that Jim had been in Italy.
The notice at least showed that Jim had been in Italy.
[211]Several weeks after the pleasant event, when he had forgotten all about it, he was loafing in his room one morning after breakfast, smoking an eccentric pipe from his collection, and comforting himself over his decision once more that German teachers and grammars are a failure.
[211]Several weeks after the nice event, when he had pushed it out of his mind, he was hanging out in his room one morning after breakfast, smoking a quirky pipe from his collection, and reassuring himself once again that German teachers and grammar are a bust.
A thump was heard at his door. He called out Herein! whereat a person in uniform strode in and stuck into Deming's hands a majestic communication from which he made out with some difficulty that he was peremptorily ordered to appear at Police Headquarters at eleven that forenoon. Fully conscious of the political innocence of his conduct, he welcomed this new diversion and, humming the latest opera bouffe air, he dressed in his best with a posy in his lapel.
A knock was heard at his door. He called out Come in! and a uniformed person walked in, handing Deming a formal notice that, after some effort, he understood was a command to report to Police Headquarters at eleven that morning. Aware of his political innocence, he embraced this new distraction and, humming the latest catchy tune, he put on his best outfit with a flower in his lapel.
His gay feelings were a little dampened at the Platz where he encountered a massive solemnity and sullen looks as if he were an arch criminal of State. A ponderous minor individual, not unarmed, commanded him to be seated in front of his desk and, eying him sternly, handed over one of Jim's invitations to the George Washington party.
His happy feelings were slightly diminished at the Platz where he came across a heavy atmosphere and gloomy expressions, as if he were a major state criminal. A hefty, serious-looking individual, not without weapons, ordered him to sit down in front of his desk and, looking at him sternly, passed him one of Jim's invitations to the George Washington party.
"Do you know of this?"
"Have you heard of this?"
[212]"Yes, sir," replied Jim, surprised that this harmless missive had turned up among the Police, and wondering what it could all be about.
[212]"Yes, sir," Jim replied, surprised that this innocent message had surfaced among the Police, and curious about what it could all mean.
"Have you authorization?"
"Do you have authorization?"
"Authorization, sir?"
"Got authorization, sir?"
"What is this?" roared the petty functionary.
"What is this?" roared the bureaucrat.
"Why, nothing at all. It means dance—ball—a little dance we had."
"Why, nothing at all. It means dance—party—a little dance we had."
"Dance—ball." The other repeated the words with a severity that champed upon its bits. "Are you this party?" He tried to pronounce Jim's formidable name on the card.
"Dance—ball." The other person echoed the words with a seriousness that bit down hard. "Are you this party?" He attempted to say Jim's impressive name on the card.
"Yes, sir."
"Yes, sir."
"What does this mean—Sec., CCC?" he roared again.
"What does this mean—Sec., CCC?" he shouted again.
Deming was getting upset, confused besides by his inadequate vocabulary.
Deming was getting upset, also confused by his limited vocabulary.
"I don't know in German, but in English we say Secretary of the Cinderella Cotillion Coterie."
"I don't know how to say it in German, but in English we say Secretary of the Cinderella Cotillion Coterie."
"Ah, you say Secretary. It is English." And an enlightened satisfaction furrowed the hardened face of the interlocutor. Then, abruptly to Deming's relief:
"Ah, you say Secretary. It is English." And a feeling of enlightened satisfaction softened the tough expression on the other person's face. Then, suddenly, to Deming's relief:
"You may go."
"You can leave now."
[213]As Jim rose to leave he found a court flunkey at either elbow. They escorted him out with a military precision and flourish. He congratulated himself on the easy way he had got through with it. He must have somehow managed it pretty well.
[213]As Jim stood up to leave, he realized there was an attendant at each elbow. They guided him out with military precision and flair. He felt proud of how smoothly he had handled the situation. He must have pulled it off quite well.
Two days later, in the evening, an attendant from the Intelligence Office ushered himself into Deming's room without announcement. He bore a summons for the next day.
Two days later, in the evening, a staff member from the Intelligence Office walked into Deming's room without any warning. He had a notice for the following day.
"Well, of all the damned fools!" Jim exclaimed to himself. "They don't seem to know I'm a free American citizen. I'll tell them this time. They are getting too familiar—walking into a chap's room without waiting to be invited."
"Well, what a bunch of idiots!" Jim said to himself. "They don’t seem to realize I'm a free American citizen. I’ll set them straight this time. They’re getting way too comfortable—walking into someone's room without even waiting to be invited."
This time he was brought before a higher official with a more exalted mien, and manners of inextinguishable anger. He held the tell-tale notice of February twenty-second in his horny paw. Deming was this time not asked to sit down.
This time he was brought before a higher official with a more impressive demeanor and a manner filled with unending anger. He held the incriminating notice of February twenty-second in his rough hand. Deming was not asked to take a seat this time.
"Who's this George?" was demanded.
"Who is this George?" was demanded.
"Why, that's our great George," confirmed Jim, sharing with jaunty confidence this bit of universal knowledge.
"Yeah, that's our great George," Jim said, confidently sharing this piece of common knowledge.
[214]"George—George—the king of England," was the gratifying conclusion.
[214]"George—George—the king of England," was the satisfying ending.
"And what does this mean?"
"And what does this mean?"
"That's Senate and the Roman People. That's just a joke."
"That's Senate and the Roman People. That's just a joke."
"Senate—Senate! Official."
"Senate—Senate! Official."
Several of the glowering army folk stood about. They took on menacing airs of importance, following the lead of their chief. An international intrigue, involving a foreign king and senate, was being rapidly unraveled. Deming was so suddenly and summarily dismissed again that he forgot to tell them proudly he was a free American citizen—with a hundred million people behind them.
Several of the scowling soldiers were gathered around. They adopted threatening attitudes, following their leader's example. An international conspiracy, involving a foreign king and senate, was quickly coming to light. Deming was dismissed again so abruptly that he forgot to proudly mention he was a free American citizen—with a hundred million people backing him.
He was becoming worried and consulted the experience of Miles Anderson whom he had, of course, met through Kirtley.
He was getting worried and talked to Miles Anderson, whom he had met through Kirtley.
"In the toils of the German high police!" chuckled Anderson. "That is certainly funny."
"In the struggles of the German police!" Anderson laughed. "That's definitely amusing."
"But what am I to do to get rid of them?" inquired Jim anxiously. "It seems I have no privacy. And I don't want to be going to the Platz all the time. Hadn't I better turn it over to our Consulate?"
"But what am I supposed to do to get rid of them?" Jim asked anxiously. "It feels like I have no privacy. And I don't want to keep going to the Platz all the time. Shouldn't I just hand it over to our Consulate?"
"Heavens, no. American consuls won't do[215] anything for you. They are considerably Germanic anyhow—work in with the local authorities. It's our easy-going American way. If you want anything done, go to the British or Japanese. Then you will get action. Our official attitude seems to be that an American ought not to be away from America. If he is away, he must look out for himself—has few rights abroad. The Germans respect the English and Japs for they mean business and their consular service is not to be trifled with."
"Heavens, no. American consuls won’t do[215] anything for you. They’re pretty much aligned with the local authorities. That’s just our laid-back American style. If you need something done, go to the British or Japanese. That’s where you’ll see results. Our official stance seems to be that an American shouldn’t be away from America. If you are, you’ve got to fend for yourself—your rights abroad are limited. The Germans respect the English and Japanese because they mean business, and their consular service is serious."
"I don't want to go to foreigners—get this thing all advertised about—go to all that trouble."
"I don't want to deal with outsiders—getting this thing all out there—going to all that hassle."
"Then tell the Germans to go to hell. That's the only way to get on with Germans. They are used to being sworn at. They will quit you then. If you don't, they will keep you trotting to Headquarters for six months. If you try to be nice, try to placate them, you'll simply get into hotter water. They don't understand such things. They think they are uncovering a vast conspiracy. Cinderella Cotillion Coterie! Gad, of all the farcical happenings I have come across even in Germany!"
"Then just tell the Germans to screw off. That's the only way to deal with them. They're used to being insulted. They'll leave you alone then. If you don’t, they’ll keep dragging you to Headquarters for six months. If you try to be nice or appease them, you’ll just get into more trouble. They don't get that kind of stuff. They think they’re uncovering some huge conspiracy. Cinderella Cotillion Coterie! Wow, out of all the ridiculous things I've seen, even in Germany!"
Deming was braced up by this advice, and[216] if anything more came of the incident he determined to see it through with some of Anderson's good American bluff and independence.
Deming felt reinforced by this advice, and[216] if anything more came from the incident, he was determined to handle it with some of Anderson's solid American confidence and independence.
The following morning he was plashing about in his bath tub when the door was bluntly opened and then partly closed. He faced around in amazement at the audacity of anyone boldly intruding into a bath room—the only place left in Germany for the self-respecting Naked Cult. His eyes fell upon another uniformed emissary from the Police. This one was very obsequious and bowed and scraped his excuses for the unseemly interruption.
The next morning, he was splashing around in his bathtub when the door was abruptly opened and then partially closed. He turned around in shock at the nerve of someone intruding into a bathroom—the only place left in Germany for those who embraced the Naked Cult. His gaze landed on another uniformed officer from the Police. This one was very subservient, bowing and apologizing for the inappropriate interruption.
"Excuse me, mein Herr, but I heard water splashing and I thought you were at breakfast."
"Excuse me, sir, but I heard water splashing and thought you were having breakfast."
Jim had adopted the fashion of talking derogatorily in English to Germans who, not understanding, usually agreed with his sentiments. This always amused him and satisfied his injured feelings.
Jim had taken to speaking negatively in English to Germans who, not understanding, typically agreed with his opinions. This always amused him and helped soothe his hurt feelings.
"That's the way with you Germans. When you hear a noise, you think someone is eating."
"That's how you Germans are. When you hear a noise, you think someone is eating."
"Ja wohl, ja wohl, mein Herr," assented[217] the incomer with crude agreeableness, all the while grinning in shamefacedness. And floating in the water Jim received another order, from the retreating and apologizing minion of the law, to stand at attention at Headquarters. He was unfamiliar with courts of any sort and did not know he should ask for an interpreter. That the officials had not as yet used one showed apparently an attempt to let the accused, thus handicapped, stumble into an incriminating confession.
"Sure, sure, sir," the newcomer agreed[217] with a blunt kind of friendliness, all the while grinning in embarrassment. Meanwhile, floating in the water, Jim received another order from the retreating and apologizing law officer to stand at attention at Headquarters. He wasn’t familiar with courts at all and didn’t realize he should ask for an interpreter. The fact that the officials hadn’t provided one yet seemed like an attempt to let the accused, already at a disadvantage, stumble into a damaging confession.
CHAPTER XXVIII
Jim Deming's Destiny
THE scene was now transferred to a third chamber which looked somewhat like an august tribunal of state. It was an imposing room divided by a long high rostrum upon which sat a terrible looking individual of the utmost lordliness. The attendants were numerous, and if Deming had ever heard of the trial of Warren Hastings he would have thought this appeared an occasion of almost equal importance and gravity. When he arrived for his ordeal before the bench, he seemed a rather small and defenseless figure.
THE scene was now set in a third chamber that resembled a formal state tribunal. It was an impressive room divided by a long, elevated platform where a menacing-looking person of great authority sat. There were many attendants present, and if Deming had ever heard of the trial of Warren Hastings, he would have thought this looked like an occasion of almost equal importance and seriousness. When he arrived for his ordeal in front of the bench, he appeared to be a rather small and vulnerable figure.
For he was now to be subjected to a sort of "third degree," with a court interpreter at hand. Every word that might be significant in his bedeviling invitation of February twenty-second was gone over with the minatory harshness of medieval inquisitors.
For he was now going to be put through a kind of "third degree," with a court interpreter present. Every word that could be important in his confusing invitation from February twenty-second was examined with the threatening harshness of medieval interrogators.
Deming explained through his intermediary. His interrogators persisted in the idea that it was a pregnant date in English history and had some sinister meaning like Guy Fawkes day. The pages of British annals had evidently been scanned to find the hidden clew.
Deming explained this through his intermediary. His interrogators clung to the idea that it was a significant date in English history and had some dark meaning, like Guy Fawkes Day. They had clearly pored over British history to uncover the hidden clue.
"'No flowers or singing of hymns.' What is all this?"
"'No flowers or singing hymns.' What's going on here?"
"Just a joke, tell him, just a little innocent fun," appealed Jim to his translator.
"Just a joke, tell him, just a bit of harmless fun," Jim urged his translator.
"You signed yourself as Secretary. That contravenes the law. You had no authority to assume an official position without conferring."
"You labeled yourself as Secretary. That goes against the law. You had no right to take an official position without consulting."
Then there was the mighty Senate and the Roman People again on the mystic communication with its cryptic letters as full of mystery as runes to these Germans. It was, of course, the language of a code.
Then there was the powerful Senate and the Roman People again engaged in mysterious communication with its cryptic letters, as enigmatic as runes to these Germans. It was, of course, the language of a code.
"Tell him that there is no such thing in the world as the Roman Senate and People," explained Deming with nervous despair. "That was just fooling. Nothing political—nothing political!" he exclaimed. Everything became less convincing and therefore visibly more sat[220]isfactory, and looks and voices grew savage in proportion.
"Tell him that the Roman Senate and People don’t actually exist," Deming said with anxious frustration. "That was just a joke. Nothing political—nothing political!" he shouted. Everything became less believable and therefore obviously more disappointing, and the expressions and tones turned increasingly aggressive.
There was also the occult CCC.
There was also the mysterious CCC.
"Who is Cinderella? Is he in Dresden with you? Where is he to be found?" The word was indicated by a big thumb. Poor Jim, whose specific information was as limited about Cinderella as about most subjects, entered nevertheless on a long explanation not only concerning her but concerning the playful innocence of the George Washington meeting.
"Who is Cinderella? Is he in Dresden with you? Where can he be found?" The word was pointed out with a big thumb. Poor Jim, whose knowledge about Cinderella was as limited as about most topics, still launched into a long explanation not just about her but also about the playful innocence of the George Washington meeting.
"Tell him it was a harmless little social affair that a few of us fellows and girls got up. We will never do it again. I did not know it would be any offense. Tell him I was only doing what I would do in my own country. There we can get together and dance a little any time without disturbing the nation." He wanted to add that the United States was not like police-ridden Germany where it almost seemed that a chap couldn't tie his shoe without permission from the Kaiser. Prudence refrained him.
"Tell him it was just a harmless little gathering that a few of us guys and girls organized. We won’t do it again. I didn’t realize it would be a problem. Let him know I was just acting the way I would in my own country. There, we can meet up and dance a bit anytime without causing any trouble. He wanted to mention that the United States isn't like Germany, where it feels like you can't even tie your shoes without the Kaiser’s approval. But he held back."
"Cotillion Coterie. That's French," translated the Ober-Offizier on the bench, gravely illuminated. An assistant suggested that sec[221] might, in fact, refer to champagne. That would be French too.
"Cotillion Coterie. That’s French," translated the officer on the bench, looking serious. An assistant suggested that sec[221] might actually refer to champagne. That would be French as well.
"When did you leave France the last time?" the other demanded in a hoarse, triumphant tone.
"When did you last leave France?" the other asked in a rough, triumphant tone.
"Never been in France," returned Jim in a loud voice.
"Never been to France," Jim said loudly.
"Never been in France and yet you use French fluently."
"Never been to France and yet you speak French fluently."
"Tell him I don't know a word of French. I didn't know that was especially French. With us it's just dancing language—everybody uses it. Tell him"—Jim added encouragingly—"tell him I never knew a Frenchman in my life."
"Tell him I don’t know any French. I didn’t realize that was particularly French. For us, it’s just dancing language—everyone uses it. Tell him” — Jim added supportively — “tell him I’ve never met a French person in my life."
"This is evidently a French affair as well as English," commented the officer. "Anglo-French. Reaches out."
"This is clearly a French issue as much as it is English," the officer remarked. "It's Anglo-French. It connects everywhere."
"What are they saying?" anxiously asked Deming of his intermediary.
"What are they saying?" Deming anxiously asked his intermediary.
On learning the new and extensive ramifications into which the sportive CCC was leading him, he threw up his hands before he thought and exclaimed, "Oh, my God!" It expressed his disgusted confirmation of Mr. Anderson's assertion—"What egregious asses such Germans can be!"—and also his own[222] alarm over his situation. When would he get back to America at this rate? It was going to cost money to escape from this scrape, and how would his governor and mother feel about it? A few months in a political prison with rats and vermin crawling over him seemed ahead instead of the jolly summer he had planned. He cursed under his breath the member of the CCC who had carelessly let his card get away from his clutches.
Upon realizing the new and wide-ranging consequences that the sporty CCC was leading him into, he raised his hands in disbelief and exclaimed, "Oh, my God!" It reflected his frustrated agreement with Mr. Anderson's comment—"What ridiculous fools those Germans can be!"—and also his own alarm about his circumstances. When would he get back to America at this rate? It was going to cost money to get out of this mess, and how would his dad and mom react? A few months in a political prison with rats and pests crawling over him seemed likely instead of the fun summer he had planned. He quietly cursed the CCC member who had carelessly let his card slip away from his grasp.
But a greater surprise awaited him. It revealed an example of the tremendous thoroughness and immense detail that were the pride of the Teuton bureaucracy. Deming was taken off his feet. The chief held up a little battered sheet.
But a bigger surprise was in store for him. It showcased the incredible thoroughness and immense detail that the Teuton bureaucracy prided itself on. Deming was completely taken aback. The chief held up a small, worn sheet.
"Have you always paid your bills in Germany?"
"Have you always paid your bills in Germany?"
"Yes, I have, sir," returned Jim, wondering at this strange turn, but fully sure of himself on this ground.
"Yeah, I have, sir," Jim replied, puzzled by this odd situation, but completely confident in himself in this regard.
"Untruth. Why did you not pay for three candles left in your room at Karlsruhe? Here is the unreceipted slip."
"Untruth. Why didn’t you pay for the three candles left in your room at Karlsruhe? Here’s the slip without a receipt."
"Because I did not use them. I did not want them. I left them on the mantel."
"Because I didn't use them. I didn't want them. I left them on the mantel."
"And here is a balance due on your laundry[223] bill at Hamburg—twelve cents—unpaid. How do you explain that?" A torn and dirty washing schedule was handed down to him to refresh his memory.
"And here’s the balance you owe on your laundry[223] bill at Hamburg—twelve cents—still unpaid. How do you explain that?" A torn and dirty washing schedule was handed to him to jog his memory.
"I didn't know I owed any balance," argued Jim to his spokesman. "Tell him it was not presented to me. Tell him I will be only too glad to pay anything I owe. I always pay what I owe." The examiner gingerly took up a crumpled napkin, brown from an overturned demi-tasse.
"I didn't know I had any balance," Jim argued to his spokesman. "Tell him it wasn't presented to me. Tell him I'll be more than happy to pay anything I owe. I always pay what I owe." The examiner carefully picked up a crumpled napkin, stained brown from a spilled demi-tasse.
"August sixteenth, you spilled coffee on your napkin at lunch—half-past twelve. And you went away from the Hotel Bellevue—Bavaria—without making it good. What have you to say to that?" The sorry cloth was held up contemptuously for Jim's inspection and for the edification of the duly pained official audience, most of whom, however, doubtless made no use of such an article in their daily lives.
"On August sixteenth, you spilled coffee on your napkin at lunch—12:30 PM. And you left the Hotel Bellevue—Bavaria—without fixing it. What do you have to say about that?" The stained cloth was held up in a scornful manner for Jim to see and for the benefit of the officially offended audience, most of whom probably didn't even use napkins like that in their everyday lives.
"I never heard anything about it!" cried Deming. "In my country such things are thrown in. Nothing said about them. But tell him I'll pay it—I'll pay anything—everything. How much is it?"
"I never heard anything about it!" Deming exclaimed. "In my country, they just throw things like that in. No one mentions them. But tell him I'll pay it—I'll pay anything—everything. How much is it?"
"Twenty-five cents, the bill claims."
"Twenty-five cents, the receipt says."
[224]"What is the total?" And Jim began digging in his pockets while holding up his head testily. He had never before been accused of hotel-beating. But payment did not yet appear to be in order. He stared at the mass of files and papers before his cross-questioner. He realized that his whole record in Germany lay there. The Imperial Service had traced him like bloodhounds. Due to his frequent irritated displays of proud American independence on his tour, the bill of small grievances, now accumulated, no doubt assumed troublesome proportions when exposed in its formidable length. Three hours had been consumed, accounted for in part by the necessity of an interpreter. As meal time was at hand Deming was commanded to appear the next morning at nine to have his testimony taken at length.
[224]"What's the total?" Jim began rummaging through his pockets while he held his head up in annoyance. He had never been accused of skipping out on a hotel bill before. But it seemed payment wasn’t happening yet. He looked at the pile of files and papers in front of his interrogator. He realized that his entire record in Germany was there. The Imperial Service had tracked him down like bloodhounds. Because of his frequent irritated outbursts demonstrating his proud American independence during his trip, the list of small grievances had probably grown to a troublesome length. Three hours had passed, partly due to the need for an interpreter. As mealtime approached, Deming was told to return the next morning at nine to have his testimony taken in detail.
He departed, his buoyant nature rising once more in partial relief. True to his Yankee instincts he now concluded they were only after the money he owed.
He left, his cheerful spirit lifting a bit again. Staying true to his Yankee instincts, he now figured they were only after the money he owed.
"They want to scare me to make me pay up," he said to himself. "They are afraid they won't get it. I'll pay the little two or three dollars and that will end the matter.[225] These blamed Germans with their ten cents and twenty-five cents! What a system of government to be bothering with these idiotic trifles!"
"They want to intimidate me into paying," he thought to himself. "They're worried they won't receive it. I'll just pay the couple of dollars and that will settle everything.[225] These damn Germans with their ten cents and twenty-five cents! What a ridiculous system of government to be dealing with these stupid little amounts!"
He sought distraction in several games of billiards followed by dinner at his favorite café. When he returned to his room late that night he found that his effects had been ransacked by two detectives. Fully incensed by this high-handed procedure he determined to place his inalienable rights in the hands of a lawyer the first thing after the early morning meeting.
He looked for a way to take his mind off things by playing a few games of billiards, then grabbing dinner at his favorite café. When he got back to his room late that night, he discovered that two detectives had gone through his things. Outraged by their overstepping, he decided to hand over his rights to a lawyer as soon as his morning meeting was over.
The taking of his testimony was a proceeding held in a small side apartment before an elderly crotchety underling who pretended to understand English and French, but whose thick-wittedness seemed monumental. The slowness and dullness indicated a whole summer's programme of this preposterous horseplay. Everything was being written down in detail in long hand in the form of questions and answers. All Deming's candles, soiled linen, stained napkins and what-not, reported from all directions of the Empire, began to be raked over. There were green, yellow, red, blue telegrams from half the German States.[226] Harassed by this muck and by the leering taunts of the old party, Jim was glad to find, at the noon hour, that the session was postponed to the second day after.
The recording of his testimony took place in a small side room with an elderly, cranky underling who pretended to understand English and French, but whose cluelessness was glaring. The slowness and dullness made it clear that this ridiculous charade had been going on all summer. Everything was being meticulously written down by hand in a question-and-answer format. All of Deming's issues—dirty laundry, stained napkins, and more—were being dug up from every part of the Empire. There were green, yellow, red, and blue telegrams from half of the German States.[226] Stressed by this mess and the mocking jabs from the old guy, Jim was relieved to learn at noon that the session was postponed until the second day after.
As he was leaving the room, another offensive inquiry about an absurdity caused him suddenly to remember Mr. Anderson's advice. And in one immortal moment in his existence he rose to a sublime height of moral courage.
As he was leaving the room, another inappropriate question about something ridiculous made him suddenly recall Mr. Anderson's advice. In that unforgettable moment of his life, he experienced a remarkable surge of moral courage.
"Go to hell!" he shot back. And as he saw the clumsy servitor beginning to pen "Answer: Go to h——" in his great book, Jim slipped out.
"Go to hell!" he retorted. And as he watched the awkward servant start to write "Answer: Go to h——" in his big book, Jim slipped away.
He briskly hunted a lawyer to whom he related all the circumstances, winding up elatedly with the last remark.
He quickly found a lawyer and shared all the details with him, ending on an uplifting note.
"Did they write that down too?"
"Did they also write that down?"
"Yes."
Yes.
The attorney was at first convulsed, familiar with Teuton naïveté. Then he dubiously shook his head. To Jim's unexpected discomfort the affair was regarded seriously. If he had not ejaculated this affront, something could be done. But now he had been guilty of what the Germans might rightfully construe as a voluntary indignity offered to the Imperial Secret Service in the performance of its[227] highly responsible duties. If he wanted to avoid important trouble, the only simple and effective course would be to quit the country. He could leave that night and in not many hours would be in Russia and beyond German control.
The lawyer was initially taken aback, recognizing the German naivety. Then he shook his head in doubt. To Jim's surprise and discomfort, the situation was taken seriously. If he hadn't blurted out that insult, there might have been a chance to do something. But now he had committed what the Germans could rightfully see as a deliberate disrespect towards the Imperial Secret Service while it was doing its[227] important duties. If he wanted to avoid major trouble, the simplest and most effective option would be to leave the country. He could leave that night, and in just a few hours, he would be in Russia, out of reach of German control.
And so Jim Deming made a hasty and unceremonious exit from the Deutschland he had been so fond of, without having time to salute any of his many friends good-by. He had to send them a line of farewell from St. Petersburg.
And so Jim Deming made a quick and informal exit from the Deutschland he had loved so much, with no time to say goodbye to any of his many friends. He had to send them a farewell note from St. Petersburg.
"Here you have German bureaucracy in its full flower and odor," remarked Anderson as he recounted the affair to Kirtley. "It flourishes to a great extent by exaggerating mole hills into mountains with officious vacuity. It is so large that there is not enough serious work for it. So something often must be found to do. It is a civil army radiating the glory of the Kaiser. The more extensive it is, the more entrenched he is. It is official dry rot which is part of the price the people pay for having themselves governed. It is national graft. But while our American forms of graft at least stimulate individual cleverness among our compatriots, this German[228] form tends to reduce its recipients to the level of donkeys, as seen in the Deming case."
"Here you see German bureaucracy at its peak," Anderson said as he shared the story with Kirtley. "It thrives by turning small issues into huge problems with pointless red tape. It’s so big that there’s not enough serious work for everyone. So something always needs to be found to do. It's like a civil army shining the light of the Kaiser. The larger it gets, the more secure he is. It's official decay, and it’s part of the cost of having a government. It's a national form of corruption. But while our American version of corruption at least encourages some individual ingenuity among our people, this German[228] version seems to dumb down those involved, as shown in the Deming case."
Gard little suspected that he was to drift into a somewhat similar misadventure, but of an advanced type.
Gard had no idea that he was about to get into a somewhat similar but more complicated situation.
CHAPTER XXIX
Winter and Spring
THE sudden drop in the life in Villa Elsa occasioned by meteoric Jim Deming's disappearance, was terrific. Frau Bucher gasped, caught her breath and sank voluminously beneath the waters of social oblivion whence she had so grandly emerged. When she finally came up to her plain surface of existence she demanded, Where are now the theater parties, and drives in the Grosse Garten behind the King? The family had almost begun to wonder how they had got on before. She wailed:
THE sudden drop in life at Villa Elsa caused by Jim Deming's abrupt departure was shocking. Frau Bucher gasped, caught her breath, and sank heavily back into the depths of social oblivion she had just so magnificently escaped. When she finally resurfaced to her ordinary reality, she demanded, "Where are the theater parties and the drives in the Grosse Garten behind the King?" The family had nearly started to forget how they managed before. She lamented:
"The good Herr Deming, the marvelous Herr Deming! How could he have abruptly left us? Something mightily strange must have forced him to go. He will surely return. How could he treat Elsa so? Here we are with our hopes, our plans and our new underwear. It is terrible."
"The good Mr. Deming, the amazing Mr. Deming! How could he have suddenly left us? Something really strange must have made him go. He will definitely come back. How could he treat Elsa like that? Here we are with our hopes, our plans, and our new underwear. It's awful."
[230]For several days the house resounded with perturbation. This gradually decreased as the readjustment to the former flat conditions took place. The transition was not completed until the information arrived that Herr Deming was never coming back. The final stroke. It was indeed pitiable, tragic, amusing. And all because the American custom of flirtation was unknown to these matter-of-fact Germans, so deadly in earnest about everything.
[230]For several days, the house was filled with unrest. This gradually faded as everyone adjusted back to their previous routine. The shift wasn't complete until the news came that Mr. Deming would never return. That was the last straw. It was truly sad, tragic, and oddly funny. All of this happened because the American way of flirting was foreign to these practical Germans, who were completely serious about everything.
But, Teuton-like, the brave ship Villa Elsa soon righted itself, being used to blows. It had at least entertained and been entertained by one of the Golden Youths of Good Fortune whose legends gild the expectations of every race. And it was a superior satisfaction to realize that this had not happened elsewhere in Loschwitz.
But, like a true warrior, the brave ship Villa Elsa quickly straightened itself out, as it was used to tough times. At least it had both amused and been amused by one of the Golden Youths of Good Fortune whose stories elevate the hopes of every generation. And it felt especially satisfying to know that this hadn’t happened anywhere else in Loschwitz.
There were left behind no lingering animosities, no painful grievings. Feelings were too stout, sensibilities too tough, to admit of acknowledging rancors or sickly complaints. The daughter's marriageable future was apparently faced again with courageous determination. As she could not be a luxurious American queen, she must be a German housewife who ranked, to say the least, high enough[231] in the eyes of Gott. But what German's wife? Oddly enough Frau Bucher, despite all her bluntness, never let a hint out of the bag of her franknesses before Kirtley.
There were no lingering grudges or painful sorrows left behind. Emotions were too strong, and sensibilities too tough, to acknowledge any resentments or weak complaints. The daughter's future in marriage seemed to be met with brave determination once again. Since she couldn't be a glamorous American queen, she had to be a German housewife who, at the very least, ranked high enough[231] in God's eyes. But which German's wife? Strangely enough, Frau Bucher, despite all her bluntness, never revealed any of her straightforward thoughts in front of Kirtley.
After Jim Deming's second riotous invasion of Villa Elsa, when there had been confirmed the abject and tumultuous surrender of the two ladies, mind, body and soul, to mere money, prostrate at the feet of an American "pig," Gard experienced a numbness of heart. True, the daughter was tied to the apron strings of her mother. But then Jim could only fling his pocketbook in her face. He had done it and she, sheep-like, had obviously accepted the situation without a question, a murmur.
After Jim Deming's second outrageous takeover of Villa Elsa, when the complete and chaotic surrender of the two ladies—mind, body, and soul—to nothing but money was confirmed, kneeling before an American "pig," Gard felt a deep numbness in his heart. Sure, the daughter was attached to her mother's apron strings. But Jim could just throw his wallet at her. He did that, and she, like a sheep, clearly accepted the situation without any questions or complaints.
How could he, as an American, gage such a blank lack of character, individuality? How different was this trait from that which was exhibited by the energetic prosecution of her talents where her personality, shining forth so steadily, held his admiration almost undimmed! This was a baffling interrogation that furnished another evidence to Kirtley of a gaping chasm separating the Teutons from other peoples. The highest ideal of German character is expressed by works. The highest[232] ideal of "Christian" character is expressed by self.
How could he, as an American, measure such an empty lack of character and individuality? How different was this quality from what was shown by her enthusiastic pursuit of her talents, where her personality shone through so brightly that it nearly held his admiration intact! This was a puzzling question that provided more evidence to Kirtley of a huge gap between the Germans and other cultures. The highest ideal of German character is shown through their achievements. The highest[232] ideal of "Christian" character is shown through the self.
Spring was now at hand. The sunlit air invited to the out-door life. The windows and doors of Villa Elsa, which was stale and stuffy from the closed-up winter, stood open and the inmates came out of their hibernation, shook themselves and welcomed the warmth and lack-luster brightness. The lindens and plane trees and shrubberies began to hug the place under their cosy leafage. Herr Bucher's rose garden was prepared to grow merry with colors. The companionable garden corner for afternoon tea and beer became a nook of liveliness. The oncoming summer sent forth generally its exulting thrills.
Spring was just around the corner. The sunny air beckoned people to enjoy the outdoors. The windows and doors of Villa Elsa, which had grown stale and stuffy from being closed all winter, stood wide open as the residents emerged from their hibernation, shook off the winter chill, and embraced the warmth and soft brightness. The linden and plane trees, along with the bushes, began to wrap the place in their cozy foliage. Herr Bucher's rose garden was ready to burst into vibrant colors. The inviting garden corner for afternoon tea and beer turned into a lively spot. The approaching summer brought with it an overwhelming sense of excitement.
This fine surging-in of sunny, revivifying Nature took at first such a strong and glad hold on Gard that his private emotions, which Elsa had so promptly sharpened and whose edge had become dulled, seemed to lay themselves pleasantly aside for the moment. Whether they were to become whetted again into keen interest remained to be seen, for the awakening green and white noon-tide of actual existence was absorbing.
This wonderful rush of sunny, refreshing Nature initially had such a strong and joyful effect on Gard that his personal feelings, which Elsa had quickly intensified and which had become somewhat blunted, seemed to take a pleasant backseat for the moment. Whether they would regain their sharpness and become intensely interesting again remained uncertain, as the vibrant green and white of real life was captivating.
Apparently she was not greatly affected by[233] Deming's departure. She betook herself to her lessons and duties with well-drilled diligence. The years were cut out for her. She had only to follow the pattern. How much more fortunate it would be, Gard had often felt, if she were detached from her semi-civilized household! Her own attractions would then be freed from the surrounding thorns, prickly hedges, that bruised and tore and dismayed one. An American chap could marry her—but oh, her family!
Apparently, she wasn’t really impacted by[233] Deming's departure. She threw herself into her lessons and responsibilities with well-practiced diligence. The years were laid out for her. She just had to follow the plan. Gard often thought how much better it would be if she were away from her somewhat uncivilized family! Her own charm would be free from the surrounding thorns, those prickly hedges that bruised, tore, and discouraged her. An American guy could marry her—but oh, her family!
It was not long, however, before she missed meals. She had begun again being mysteriously mute at times in her room, over the Heine poems. Gard had almost forgotten them.
It wasn't long before she started skipping meals. She had begun to fall silent again at times in her room, lost in the Heine poems. Gard had almost forgotten about them.
There were no promenades this early season in the meadow, with the poet. No duos were played. Winter, for that matter, was a more favorable time for them, as it was also for the family concerts.
There were no walks this early in the season in the meadow, with the poet. No duets were played. Winter, in fact, was a better time for them, as it was also for the family concerts.
Fräulein observed a meaningless familiarity with Kirtley as if he were an old member of the home circle. He wondered again if Rudolph had influenced and troubled from the first her relations with himself. And nowadays Tekla was surly toward him. She[234] served him unwillingly and grabbed his occasional Trinkgelds with scarcely a thank-you. Had Rudi, with whom he had had hardly any contact, stirred her up against him out of sheer unjustified Satanism?
Fräulein felt a strange familiarity with Kirtley, as if he were an old friend. He wondered again if Rudolph had been the reason for the tension between them from the start. Lately, Tekla had been unfriendly toward him. She[234] reluctantly served him and took his occasional tips with hardly a thank-you. Had Rudi, with whom he barely interacted, turned her against him out of pure malice?
The spring weather somewhat curtailed, mollified, all the frank irascibility and wrangling that went on in the house, and it was under the lukewarm spell of this German virgin summer-time that the routine took on its most agreeable aspects, though accompanied with the usual Teuton domestic din. It was, in fact, very enjoyable, contrasted with what the cold months had permitted.
The spring weather eased and softened all the open anger and arguments happening in the house, and it was under the mild charm of this German early summer that the daily routine became its most pleasant, even with the usual noisy chaos of a German home. It was actually quite enjoyable compared to what the cold months allowed.
In the winter a pleasant feature had been the theater or opera nights. Darkness then came at four. Dinner would be served at five in order to reach the amusement place at half past six or seven. By eleven the family were back in Loschwitz, sitting down, starved, to a bouncing supper where frequently Kirtley regaled himself with the toothsome Pumpernickel. Over the hot dishes the feverish points of the entertainment were discussed, exclaimed about, while the party cooled off and solaced themselves with Schultheiss. These were rousing and satisfying little happenings.
In the winter, one nice aspect was the theater or opera nights. Darkness fell around four o'clock. Dinner was served at five so they could get to the venue by six-thirty or seven. By eleven, the family would be back in Loschwitz, sitting down to a late supper, often feeling famished, where Kirtley would enjoy the delicious Pumpernickel. They would discuss the exciting highlights of the show over the hot dishes, reacting passionately while the group relaxed and enjoyed some Schultheiss. These were lively and fulfilling little events.
[235]Free public lectures had also been a source of enjoyment to the Buchers during the long frigid fortnights. Of the five senses, Gard reflected, hearing is the only good one the Germans possess. They hear, absorb through hearing, to better advantage than other races. They close their eyes and drink in seriously. Naturally enough comes about the universality of their music and lectures.
[235]Free public lectures had also been a source of enjoyment for the Buchers during the long, cold weeks. Gard reflected that out of the five senses, hearing is the only one that the Germans really excel at. They listen and absorb information through hearing better than other cultures. They close their eyes and take it all in seriously. This is why their music and lectures are so universally appreciated.
Of these public dissertations a course on the Union between Greek Philosophy and Greek Poetry was especially raved over in Villa Elsa. Gard attended one of these evenings, inspired by the instructional ardors of Frau and Fräulein and Ernst. The example of little Ernst, avid of such intellectual pleasures at his tender age, ever impressed Gard anew. He thought of American lads in comparison.
Of these public lectures, a course on the connection between Greek Philosophy and Greek Poetry was particularly praised in Villa Elsa. Gard attended one of these evenings, inspired by the enthusiastic teachings of Frau, Fräulein, and Ernst. The example of young Ernst, so eager for such intellectual pursuits at his young age, continually impressed Gard. He thought about American boys in comparison.
The German professor, as is well known, occupies a much more potent and exalted position in Germany than the American professor in America. He is considered a reliable fount of wisdom. He speaks with sure authority. He is an oracle, permanent and sounding afar.
The German professor, as is well known, holds a much more powerful and esteemed position in Germany than the American professor in the United States. He is seen as a trustworthy source of knowledge. He speaks with confident authority. He is an oracle, enduring and resonating from a distance.
On this occasion, precisely at eight o'clock, in a majestic university hall, Kirtley saw this particular grand and popular orator ascend[236] the pulpit. He was in full dress—white waistcoat, white tie, white kids. He was large, shapely, commanding. The women were "at his feet." He stood there solemnly as the clock was striking, and slowly removed his gloves and inserted them under his coat tail. And for exactly an hour there was a remarkable flow of formidable, finished periods, without a note, without a hesitation. Gard really felt there would never be anything else to say about Beauty, so profound, so complete, so final, seemed this survey of the topic.
On this occasion, exactly at eight o'clock, in a grand university hall, Kirtley watched this well-known and impressive speaker take the stage[236]. He was dressed to the nines—white waistcoat, white tie, white gloves. He was tall, well-built, and commanding. The women were completely captivated by him. He stood there solemnly as the clock chimed, slowly took off his gloves, and tucked them under his coat. For exactly an hour, he delivered a remarkable stream of powerful, polished sentences, without a single note or any hesitation. Gard truly felt there could be nothing more to say about Beauty; this discussion seemed so deep, so thorough, and so definitive.
At the close the audience flocked to the speaker as if to an Olympian victor. Frau Bucher was ecstatic, covering him with her compliments while insisting on waiting for a propitious moment to introduce Herr Kirtley. But as Gard remained there at the lecturer's elbow, he met with another disillusion about German professors. This locally famous man, so correctly dressed to outward view, wore no shirt collar under his beard. His neck and ears showed no signs of recent ablutions and were bushy with unkempt hairs. And he exhaled a rank odor compounded of perspiration and dirt.
At the end, the audience crowded around the speaker like he was a champion from the Olympics. Frau Bucher was thrilled, showering him with compliments while making sure to wait for the right moment to introduce Herr Kirtley. But as Gard stood there next to the lecturer, he experienced another disappointment about German professors. This locally renowned man, who looked so well-dressed on the surface, wasn’t wearing a shirt collar under his beard. His neck and ears had no signs of recent washing and were overgrown with untidy hair. Plus, he gave off a strong smell of sweat and dirt.
Gard almost choked, being crowded into[237] close contact. Could he ever get fully accustomed to German smells? It was most unpleasant, disenchanting. He could not, it appeared, find himself attracted to Teuton university expounders—those gods of wisdom who had repulsed him.
Gard nearly choked, being packed into[237] close quarters. Would he ever get used to German smells? It was really unpleasant, disheartening. He seemed unable to feel any attraction to German university professors—those so-called gods of wisdom who had turned him off.
Whether it was his unfortunate luck or not, he was not able to summon a desire to go again. He had not forgotten his other experience. It was a part of that something fundamentally, monumentally lacking in the German race—something shoddy, deceptive, which he had met with at so many turns.
Whether it was his bad luck or not, he couldn't bring himself to want to go again. He hadn't forgotten his other experience. It was part of that fundamental, huge absence in the German people—something cheap, misleading, which he had encountered at so many points.
CHAPTER XXX
Villa Elsa Outside
IN the vernal season the lectures and theaters were dropped for neighborhood excursions of which the Buchers, like all German families, were extremely fond. A rendezvous would be made for dinner, for instance, at some attractive spot up the Elbe. It would be a walking trip from Loschwitz along the winding banks or up on a higher path stretching from one smooth, low-lying hilltop to another. Everywhere the invigorating odor of pine lay in the air. The company assembled by twos or singly at their convenience during the late afternoon. Generally the Herr would be last. And when he was spied approaching, with a cock's feather in his hat and supporting himself authoritatively on his big stick, a chorus of acclaim greeted him, for craving appetites were now to be satisfied.
IN the spring season, the lectures and theater performances were paused for neighborhood outings that the Buchers, like all German families, really enjoyed. A meeting spot would be arranged for dinner, for example, at a scenic location along the Elbe. It would be a hike from Loschwitz along the winding riverbanks or on a higher path connecting one gentle, low hilltop to another. Everywhere, the refreshing scent of pine filled the air. The group would gather in pairs or alone at their own pace during the late afternoon. Usually, the Herr would arrive last. And when he was spotted coming up, with a cock’s feather in his hat and leaning confidently on his big stick, a cheer went up, as everyone was ready to satisfy their hungry appetites.
[239]The household would pass the evening dining al fresco and enjoying the landscape studded with historic and other enduring memories. Near by was Hosterwitz, where Weber composed "Oberon" and "Der Freischütz." Often mists from the Elbe rose mystically to engarland the crenelated castles here and there on the heights. A drowsy river boat in that long agreeable northern twilight would finally gather up the family at the dock and drop them off at home.
[239]The family would spend the evening dining outdoors and enjoying the landscape filled with historic and lasting memories. Nearby was Hosterwitz, where Weber composed "Oberon" and "Der Freischütz." Often, mists from the Elbe would rise mysteriously to cover the crenelated castles scattered on the hills. A sleepy riverboat in that long, pleasant northern twilight would eventually pick up the family at the dock and take them home.
Sundays were the favorite time for these little outings. Lessons, classes, tasks, were then lightened. Gard had quickly become aware in Germany that the Sabbath is considerably a day of work as well as pleasure. The usual impression in America that the Germans are religious, not to speak of being moral, was dispelled. This had been a fragment of his erroneous idea that they are active Protestants in the sense that carries any Calvinistic or ethical meaning.
Sundays were the best time for these little outings. Lessons, classes, and tasks were then much lighter. Gard quickly realized in Germany that the Sabbath is actually a day of both work and enjoyment. The common belief in America that Germans are religious, not to mention moral, was proven wrong. This had been part of his mistaken idea that they are active Protestants in a way that implies any Calvinistic or ethical significance.
Neither the Buchers, nor any of the families whom Kirtley met through them, went to church. The Protestant churches were, in fact, gloomy, tasteless and almost empty. Their services appeared cheerless and forbid[240]ding. Tremendous fear was their keynote. It seemed far more agreeable to a German to partake of the national sacrament out in a beer garden.
Neither the Buchers nor any of the families Kirtley met through them went to church. The Protestant churches were, in fact, dreary, uninviting, and nearly empty. Their services seemed joyless and unwelcoming. A sense of deep fear dominated the atmosphere. It felt much more enjoyable for a German to enjoy the national ritual in a beer garden.
His attitude seemed to be that his race were born so constitutionally and thoroughly in line with Divineness that they did not need to do anything about it. The religious element, as a shaper of conduct and thought, was accordingly not required. As for any restraining power, the Government furnished all of this that was necessary.
His attitude appeared to be that his race was inherently aligned with Divineness, so they didn't need to actively do anything about it. Therefore, the religious aspect, which shapes behavior and thought, wasn't needed. As for any need for control, the Government provided all that was necessary.
At any rate the rulers looked after religion. They observed all-sufficiently its rites. They stood next to Deity and represented and protected the people. Kirtley remarked that when the ordinary German began talking of God, which was rare, he was soon talking of the Emperor. Both deities were ever solicitous for him, working tirelessly in his behalf. The Kaiser was properly the national busybody, the head schoolmaster, who attended to everybody and everything and drove all constantly forward toward a unified and splendid destiny.
At any rate, the rulers took care of religion. They adequately observed its rituals. They stood next to God and represented and protected the people. Kirtley noted that when the average German talked about God, which was rare, he quickly ended up talking about the Emperor. Both figures were always looking out for him, working tirelessly on his behalf. The Kaiser was essentially the national busybody, the headmaster, who looked after everyone and everything and pushed all constantly toward a unified and glorious future.
Thus arose the firm belief of the Germans in their natural righteousness—the righteous[241]ness of how they act, what they possess. Gard saw there existed among them little virtue in the way of religion to offer the youth of other lands. To send an American son or daughter to Deutschland for such influence and benefit was but another example of the prevailing misconception of real Teutonism.
Thus arose the strong belief among Germans in their natural righteousness—the righteousness of their actions and what they possess. Gard noticed that there was little virtue in their approach to religion to offer the youth from other countries. Sending an American son or daughter to Germany for such influence and benefit was just another example of the common misconception about true Teutonism.
Many an evening the family dined at the famous Schiller Garden which stretched along the shore, just across the river. Knitting and sewing and books were taken along, a large table was secured, and there the members ate and refreshed themselves with liquids in leisurely fashion from six o'clock until bed time. There would be plenty of talking and smoking and plying of needles as the moonlight or river lights danced forth to guide the active river traffic and also the large inflowings and outflowings of restaurant guests. And all to the bracing music of a capital orchestra reeling off jubilant marches and waltzes.
Many evenings, the family dined at the famous Schiller Garden that lined the shore just across the river. They brought along knitting, sewing, and books, secured a large table, and enjoyed their meals and drinks leisurely from six o'clock until bedtime. There was plenty of conversation, smoking, and needlework as the moonlight and river lights illuminated the busy river traffic as well as the many guests coming and going from the restaurant. All of this was accompanied by the lively music of a fantastic orchestra playing cheerful marches and waltzes.
These were good times when the German was to be observed under the most favorable colors. After Tekla's little tragedy snatched her away from Villa Elsa, as will soon be seen, this dining out became the regular event of the day.
These were great times when the German could be seen in the best light. After Tekla's little tragedy took her away from Villa Elsa, as will be revealed soon, dining out became the daily highlight.
[242]On one of these occasions in the Schiller Garden the conversation fell once more on America. The subject had not been touched since the eruption over Yankee "pigs". It had lain dormant under the mesmeric effect of Jim Deming's appearance.
[242]On one of these occasions in the Schiller Garden, the conversation turned back to America. They hadn’t talked about it since the incident with the Yankee "pigs." It had been put on hold, overshadowed by the captivating presence of Jim Deming.
Gard gathered the following for his notebook. The Buchers maintained that, even if the Hohenzollerns were not wanted, they were necessary to hold Germany together. Otherwise she would split up into many impotent states and be at the mercy of the solidary races adjoining her. But who could not want the Hohenzollerns? They had made of Germany—really a small, poor country—a mighty power. Look at huge America, by contrast! She was weak, disorganized, aimless. She was the proverbial giant with few bones. The western half of the United States was still practically undeveloped, and yet it abounded in natural wealth.
Gard gathered the following for his notebook. The Buchers argued that, even if the Hohenzollerns weren’t wanted, they were essential to keeping Germany united. Otherwise, it would break apart into many weak states and be at the mercy of the neighboring races. But who wouldn’t want the Hohenzollerns? They had transformed Germany—originally a small, poor country—into a powerful nation. Look at huge America, in contrast! It was weak, disorganized, and aimless. It was the classic example of a giant with few bones. The western half of the United States was still mostly undeveloped, yet it was rich in natural resources.
Then there was the Monroe Doctrine. It was a baseless fiat for which there was no legal or moral justification—as arrogant a presumption as could be claimed of any edict of a Kaiser. The Buchers asserted that the Doctrine was a crime against humanity. It had[243] kept, for a hundred years, South America and Central America indifferently civilized, miserably governed, their thin populations uneducated, thriftless, superstitious, bigoted. Said the Herr:
Then there was the Monroe Doctrine. It was an unfounded declaration with no legal or moral justification—an arrogant assumption akin to any decree from a Kaiser. The Buchers claimed that the Doctrine was a crime against humanity. For a hundred years, it had[243] left South America and Central America poorly civilized, poorly governed, with their sparse populations uneducated, wasteful, superstitious, and bigoted. The Herr said:
"If our Germany had had full access to that half hemisphere it would be in a full blaze of progress. It would be affording prosperous homes to untold millions of Europeans now packed together like sardines. The mines, forests, rich soils, grazing lands, would have long ago been completely opened up, tilled, occupied, for the benefit of man who is still, in the main, inadequately fed and clothed. We Germans can, admittedly, manufacture cheaper and better goods than anyone. We ought to be free in our way and by our own methods to supply those Americas with the necessities and comforts of civilization and make them rich and happy.
"If Germany had full access to that half of the world, it would be thriving with progress. It would be providing prosperous homes for countless millions of Europeans who are currently crammed together like sardines. The mines, forests, rich soils, and grazing lands would have long been fully developed, cultivated, and settled for the benefit of people who are still, for the most part, poorly fed and clothed. We Germans can produce cheaper and better goods than anyone else. We should be free to provide those Americas with the necessities and comforts of civilization in our own way, making them prosperous and happy."
"Their mongrel races are poverty stricken, disease stricken, and often fighting among themselves. The United States does little for them. Nor will she let anyone else. She plays the dog in the manger to the detriment of the world. And this is because she is vain, timid and without plan. Is that logical, wise and[244] serving mankind for the best? Were conditions reversed, would she herself favor such a backward, lagging programme?"
Their mixed heritage groups are impoverished, plagued by illness, and often fighting among themselves. The United States does very little to help them, and she won’t allow anyone else to step in either. She acts like the dog in the manger, harming the world in the process. This is due to her vanity, fearfulness, and lack of a plan. Is that logical, wise, and beneficial for humanity? If the roles were reversed, would she support such a backward, lagging agenda?
Kirtley admitted to himself that this was a very good and valid point of view for Germans. He recognized its general source, for the Buchers, in the Dresden newspapers. But he did not enter into argument. He had satisfied himself that argument with Teutons, who do not have open minds, who are obsessed by fixed ideas bored into them, can only end in unpleasantness—a row. He had come to Germany to learn. It would be defeating this purpose to air what notions he might have.
Kirtley acknowledged to himself that this was a valid perspective for Germans. He understood where it was coming from, particularly the Buchers and the Dresden newspapers. However, he chose not to argue. He had convinced himself that debating with Teutons, who close their minds and are fixated on ingrained ideas, would only lead to conflict. He had come to Germany to learn, and it would undermine that goal to express any opinions he might have.
In Villa Elsa itself a good deal of the feasting in April and May was carried on in the garden where flowers and dogs completed the picture, together with much open-air singing accompanied by the piano up in the salon. Were it not for the musical cult, it would have been difficult, Gard had concluded, to live in this household. As Anderson said, music had in a degree tamed the German "beast" of the north and made it possible to get on with him at all. Music rather than woman, religion, or[245] the ideal of social intercourse, had partly softened him.
In Villa Elsa, a lot of the feasting in April and May took place in the garden, where flowers and dogs added to the scene, along with plenty of open-air singing accompanied by the piano in the salon. If it weren't for the musical influence, Gard realized it would have been hard to live in this household. As Anderson noted, music had somewhat tamed the German "beast" of the north and made it possible to coexist with him. Music, rather than women, religion, or[245] the idea of social interaction, had partially softened him.
The Bucher sons liked to come to table outdoors with spurs or side arms, and the Herr's favorite hunting equipment was often in evidence, recalling to him days of valiant sport. With their stiff and long strides they affected to be larger, greater, than other males. Supermen in the form of Goliaths! The women loved the sight of such warlike paraphernalia. Such things added zest to the joyous toast—Der Tag! But none of these heroes had yet killed anyone or anything, so far as Kirtley discovered.
The Bucher sons liked to eat outdoors wearing spurs or sidearms, and the Herr's favorite hunting gear was often on display, reminding him of days filled with great sport. With their stiff and long strides, they tried to appear larger and more impressive than other men. Supermen in the guise of Goliaths! The women loved seeing such warlike gear. It added excitement to the joyful toast—Der Tag! But as far as Kirtley found out, none of these heroes had actually killed anyone or anything yet.
In warm weather Villa Elsa did not relax in the matter of six daily repasts. Breakfast at half-past seven. Bread, slices of cold meat and something in addition, at eleven. Luncheon at one, hearty enough for a dinner. At half-past four helles beer and tea with Butterbrods. Dinner at seven. And on going to bed a fortifying supper of pigs' feet, sausage, cheese and other man-like delicacies, flooded with potations.
In warm weather, Villa Elsa kept up its routine of six meals a day. Breakfast was at 7:30 AM. At 11 AM, there were bread, slices of cold meat, and something extra. Lunch was at 1 PM, substantial enough to be dinner. At 4:30 PM, there was beer and tea with sandwiches. Dinner was served at 7 PM. And before bed, there was a hearty supper of pigs' feet, sausage, cheese, and other hearty treats, accompanied by drinks.
Gard had, after the months, adjusted himself somewhat to these conditions. He had become, he thought, more used to the German[246] way of living. To get the best out of it, he realized that one must coarsen instead of refine the senses and aptitudes. Instincts should be strengthened, roughened, rather than checked or made more esthetic. The German puts a heavy hand on things. He takes big bites at existence. Thunderous might envelops and clouds his idea of perfection.
Gard had, after several months, somewhat adjusted to these conditions. He believed he had become more accustomed to the German way of living. To get the most out of it, he understood that one must toughen up the senses and skills instead of refining them. Instincts should be enhanced, rugged, rather than restricted or made more refined. The German approaches things with a strong hand. He takes big bites out of life. A powerful force surrounds and clouds his idea of perfection.
CHAPTER XXXI
A Chill Tragedy
ONE morning early in June when Kirtley, who had been away the afternoon and evening before, came down to breakfast, he found the household upset. Something bad had happened. Tekla was gone. Rudi was not to be seen. Frau had prepared a partial meal and Elsa was making ready to sweep and dust and tidy up the rooms.
ONE morning early in June, Kirtley, who had been away the afternoon and evening before, came down for breakfast and found the household in disarray. Something was wrong. Tekla was missing, and Rudi was nowhere to be found. Frau had prepared only part of the meal, and Elsa was getting ready to sweep, dust, and tidy up the rooms.
The parents were in a rage. They made no bones about it. Frau blurted out with German unreservedness:
The parents were furious. They didn't hide it at all. Frau blurted out with typical German bluntness:
"I packed Tekla off—the animal. She had no consideration for me. What do you think, Herr Kirtley? She is going to be a mother. And by Rudi. Wouldn't you have thought he would have more sense than this—right here at home—break up my service? He let her get him into the mess. I have no doubt[248] it was her doings—my poor Rudi. We have sent him away for a couple of days. I told Tekla to go—be off. And she was out on the street—like that—with her bundle of belongings under her arm. And here I am with no servant. Ach Gott! they are all cattle, of course. One has to put up with them."
"I sent Tekla away—the animal. She didn’t care about me at all. What do you think, Herr Kirtley? She’s going to be a mom. And with Rudi. Wouldn’t you have thought he’d have more sense than this—right here at home—to ruin my service? He let her drag him into this mess. I’m sure it was all her doing—my poor Rudi. We’ve sent him away for a couple of days. I told Tekla to go—just leave. And she was out on the street—just like that—with her stuff under her arm. And here I am with no servant. Ach Gott! They’re all just useless, of course. You have to put up with them."
Herr was in a growling, ferocious state. He blamed Tekla. He blamed his Frau for not knowing what was going on. It was the woman's fault. Everything always was. His incomplete breakfast was late.
Herr was in a grumpy, furious mood. He blamed Tekla. He blamed his wife for not understanding what was happening. It was the woman's fault. It always was. His half-eaten breakfast was late.
"Is there nothing left to eat in the house?" he cried out. He took on a famished and abused air, although he had had his usual six meals the day before. "Give me at least some cheese and bread!"
"Is there nothing left to eat in the house?" he shouted. He acted like he was starving and mistreated, even though he had his usual six meals the day before. "Just give me some cheese and bread!"
In this manner Tekla was roundly denounced for interrupting the course of family comfort. That she had mortally sinned awakened no attention, aroused no concern. There was no sympathy expressed for her in her condition, no responsibility felt for her in her downfall or anxiety about her future. Whether she would, from this misstep, have to take to the streets for a living occurred to no one but Kirtley.
In this way, Tekla was harshly criticized for disrupting the family’s comfort. The fact that she had seriously sinned went unnoticed and stirred no worry. No one expressed sympathy for her situation, felt any responsibility for her downfall, or showed concern about her future. The thought that she might have to resort to the streets to survive after this mistake crossed the mind of no one except for Kirtley.
[249]Germans are little wrought up about such questions. There is no shuddering as from an admitted mortal sin. Natural impulses and facts are natural impulses and facts. Why should one be squeamish about them or have soul burnings? In general, carnal desires meet with no great fastidiousness in the German domestic circle. They are rather regarded as honest and healthy like desires for food and drink. The Teuton wife is ashamed of barrenness and considers it proper for women to be fully sexed in feeling. Sexuality is not something to be shrunk from, discouraged or denied, but is a candid, copious law of Nature to be recognized.
[249]Germans aren't too bothered by these questions. There's no shuddering as if it's a serious sin. Natural urges and facts are just that—natural urges and facts. Why should anyone feel squeamish about them or experience guilt? Generally, physical desires aren't met with much fuss in German homes. They’re seen as honest and healthy, much like the desire for food and drink. A German wife feels ashamed of being unable to have children and believes it's normal for women to have strong sexual feelings. Sexuality isn’t something to be avoided, discouraged, or denied; it’s a straightforward and abundant law of Nature that should be acknowledged.
When Rudi returned shortly from Leipsic, where it had been deemed best for him to retire for the moment, he appeared as conceited and noisy as if nothing had happened. He was not cowed or penitent. His parents, who had got Villa Elsa in running order and were forgetting the contretemps, almost beamed upon him. He was now a full-fledged male. Any lingering uncertainties as to his completed manhood had been effectually removed. His affair was viewed from the standpoint of potent strength, not lapse from virtue. Young[250] men had their wild oats to sow. His mistake had been to disturb his own household. Had it been another household, little heed would have been given.
When Rudi came back shortly from Leipzig, where it was decided he should take a break for now, he acted as self-important and loud as if nothing had changed. He wasn't intimidated or remorseful. His parents, who had gotten Villa Elsa ready and were moving past the incident, almost smiled at him. He was now a fully-grown man. Any lingering doubts about his maturity had been completely erased. His situation was seen as a sign of strong masculinity, not a fall from grace. Young men had their wild times to experience. His mistake was disrupting his own home. If it had been someone else's home, not much attention would have been paid.
In the Bucher minds the satisfying net result seemed to be that another soldier (it was to be hoped) was to be born for the army, for the Kaiser. Soldiers had to be. Tekla was to fulfill her highest mission as a German servant girl. She was to become a just and constituent part of the swelling Empire.
In the Bucher family's perspective, the comforting conclusion was that another soldier (hopefully) was about to be brought into the army, for the Kaiser. There had to be soldiers. Tekla was meant to carry out her greatest purpose as a German servant girl. She was to be a fair and essential part of the expanding Empire.
Frau's ideas and information on the subject provided Gard's journal with some more condensed material. They were talking out by the garden table.
Frau's ideas and information on the topic gave Gard's journal some more concise material. They were chatting at the garden table.
"What becomes of the German servant girl under such conditions?" he inquired.
"What happens to the German servant girl in these circumstances?" he asked.
"Oh, she can get into another family and go on as before."
"Oh, she can join another family and keep going like before."
"And the baby? How does she manage with that?"
"And the baby? How is she handling that?"
"She puts it out among poor farm people and pays a little for its keep. As the mother usually works about in different localities—sometimes being taken far away by her employers—the farmer often adopts the baby as it grows up. He can always use more help.[251] If it's a girl, she is good for the farm as well as the house. If it's a boy, he becomes a soldier. A boy of this kind makes the best soldier because he has no parental and no home attachments. He only knows the barracks and has the officers to obey. He does not learn who his father is, and the mother becomes practically a stranger to him as she moves about in the city or country. He is ready to serve in the colonies or go anywhere or do anything, having no personal ties to hold him."
"She leaves the baby with poor farm families and pays a little for its care. Since the mother often works in different places—sometimes being taken far away by her employers—the farmer frequently takes in the child as it grows up. He can always use more help.[251] If it’s a girl, she’s useful on the farm as well as in the house. If it’s a boy, he becomes a soldier. A boy like this makes the best soldier because he has no parents or home connections. He only knows the barracks and has to follow the officers' orders. He doesn’t find out who his father is, and his mother becomes almost a stranger to him as she moves around in the city or countryside. He’s ready to serve in the colonies or go anywhere or do anything, having no personal ties to hold him back."
"Does not your large army badly demoralize these social conditions?"
"Doesn’t your large army seriously demoralize these social conditions?"
"You know, we housewives don't like it much when a new regiment moves into the vicinity. It makes mothers among our domestics and we have to change about. Of course, you see, we have more women than men in Germany and we must have children growing up for the barracks and the cheap labor market. There seems to be no other way, but it is often a great nuisance for us housekeepers. Yet there is this to say: The girls rarely have more than one child by the same man. For another regiment comes along and there are new relations. The army is necessarily a[252] floating population and not very responsible for what it does among us civilians because it protects us."
You know, we housewives really don’t appreciate it when a new regiment moves into the area. It creates complications for the mothers among our staff, and we have to adjust accordingly. You see, we have more women than men in Germany, and we need to ensure that children are growing up to serve in the military and fill the low-wage job market. There doesn’t seem to be another option, but it often becomes a real hassle for us homemakers. However, on the bright side, the girls usually only have one child with the same man. Then a different regiment comes in, and new relationships form. The army is basically a[252] transient population and doesn’t feel very accountable for its actions among us civilians because it protects us.
Kirtley concluded that this accounted for the large number of detached young men in Germany—in the army and out of it—who appeared to be so entirely footloose, ready for any mission or task in any part of the globe. As the two sat there talking about the question of lovelessness in these relations, Herr Bucher strolled up from his flower beds and joined them in his Tyrolean jacket of the chase and big army boots. Gard said,
Kirtley concluded that this explained the high number of detached young men in Germany—both in the army and outside of it—who seemed completely free and ready for any mission or task anywhere in the world. While they sat there discussing the issue of lovelessness in these relationships, Herr Bucher walked over from his flower beds and joined them, wearing his Tyrolean hunting jacket and big army boots. Gard said,
"We were speaking of affection, Herr Bucher. Why do the Germans have the ideal of hate when other races are holding up the ideal of love?"
"We were talking about affection, Mr. Bucher. Why do Germans hold onto the ideal of hate while other races are embracing the ideal of love?"
"Because it is good to hate!" exclaimed the host with rugged forcefulness as he squatted in a seat. "To hate is strong, manly. It makes the blood flow. It makes one alert. It is necessary for keeping up the fighting instinct. To love is a feebleness. It enervates. You see all the nations that talk of love as the keynote of life are weak, degenerate. Germany is the most powerful nation in the world because she hates. When you hate, you[253] eat well, sleep well, work well, fight well. It is best for the health. When you love, it is like a sickness and disorganizes and debilitates."
"Because it's good to hate!" the host shouted with rugged intensity as he settled into his chair. "Hating is strong and manly. It gets your blood pumping. It keeps you alert. It's essential for maintaining your fighting spirit. Loving is a weakness. It drains you. Just look at all the nations that preach love as the essence of life; they are weak and fallen. Germany is the most powerful nation in the world because it hates. When you hate, you[253] eat well, sleep well, work well, fight well. It’s better for your health. When you love, it feels like a disease that disrupts and weakens you."
"How do you reconcile that with Christ and His mission of love?" pursued Gard.
"How do you reconcile that with Christ and His mission of love?" Gard pressed on.
"There is nothing to reconcile. We simply do not admit all that. It is not practical. Christ was not practical. He had no family. He made no home. He never even built a house. He did not found a State. He let the Romans run over Him. How can one live in a cold northern climate without a house, a nation and an army to protect him? No, it is not at all practical. Even Christ could not defend Himself. He was crucified without any resistance, any struggle. To hate is to struggle and that is the mainspring of action. So one must prepare himself to struggle successfully. To hate, to cause to be feared, are the proper motives for life. They are life. Fear is a stronger and far more universal human motive than love. Therefore we Germans want to be feared rather than to be loved. So we hate because it engenders fear in others. To love is already half a surrender and ends logically in death. With Christ the[254] real victory, the real heaven aspired to, was in death, not in life."
"There’s nothing to reconcile. We just don’t accept all of that. It’s not practical. Christ wasn’t practical. He didn’t have a family. He didn’t create a home. He never even built a house. He didn’t establish a State. He let the Romans walk all over Him. How can someone survive in a cold northern climate without a house, a nation, and an army for protection? No, that’s not practical at all. Even Christ couldn’t defend Himself. He was crucified without putting up any resistance, without any struggle. To hate is to struggle, and that’s the main driver of action. So one must get ready to struggle successfully. To hate, to inspire fear, are the true motives for life. They are life. Fear is a much stronger and more universal human motive than love. That’s why we Germans prefer to be feared rather than loved. Therefore, we hate because it creates fear in others. To love is already half giving up and logically ends in death. With Christ, the[254] real victory, the real heaven sought, was in death, not in life."
The Herr had faithfully read Rudi's contemporary German military philosophers.
The Herr had faithfully read Rudi's modern German military philosophers.
Truly this was too strange a race, Kirtley felt, to admit of any levels of genuine, unreserved association and companionship except under a quasi truce or other provisional conditions. To form a perfect union with it, other races had to adopt its attitude. It could not and would not adopt theirs until some sort of a Teuton reformation took place.
Truly, Kirtley felt this was too strange a group to allow for any real, open association and friendship except under a quasi
In the midst of these repulsing discords Gard was surprised, on returning to his room a night or two later, to find by his table a new red and gold copy of Heine's verse inclosing a sprig of forget-me-not. On the fly leaf was inscribed in a youthful, copybook hand:
In the middle of these upsetting disputes, Gard was surprised, a night or two later, to find a new red and gold edition of Heine's poetry on his table, with a sprig of forget-me-not tucked inside. On the flyleaf, there was a message written in a youthful, neat handwriting:
Immer heller brennt die Licht,
Meines schoen' Vergissmeinnicht.
Immer heller brennt das Licht,
Meiner schönen Vergissmeinnicht.
Offered to her meadow pupil
By his meadow teacher.
Offered to her student in the meadow
By his teacher in the meadow.
(Ever brighter burns the light
Of my sweet forget-me-not.)
(Ever brighter burns the light
Of my dear forget-me-not.)
[255]The Germans are not original in love-making. Elsa had read of such things being done. But it was an admission or advance from her as unexpected as it was belated. Gard tossed about awhile on his bed, thinking of it. As he had often acknowledged to himself, he had been interested in her more than any girl he had yet known.
[255]The Germans aren't original when it comes to romance. Elsa had read about such things happening. But her confession or proposal came as a surprise to her; it felt both unexpected and long overdue. Gard lay on his bed for a while, contemplating it. He had often admitted to himself that he was more interested in her than any other girl he had met so far.
In the morning, when things were clearer in his consciousness, he assumed that her enterprising, calculating mother had inspired the gift. For it seemed to be apropos of nothing in particular at this unpropitious time, although he had made Elsa little presents during the fall and early winter. It was evident that the family, after the arrival of the mirific Jim Deming, had grown somewhat accustomed to Americans and had at length struck a sentimental attitude.
In the morning, when his thoughts were clearer, he figured that her savvy, shrewd mother had come up with the gift. It really seemed to be out of nowhere at this inconvenient time, even though he had given Elsa small gifts during the fall and early winter. It was clear that the family, after the arrival of the amazing Jim Deming, had started to get used to Americans and had finally taken on a sentimental perspective.
CHAPTER XXXII
A German marriage proposal
A DAY or two afterward, another little tragedy visited Villa Elsa, following on the heels of the unfortunate departure of Tekla. Ernst came home at lunch time with his head swollen in reds and purples and hardly able to walk. At his morning drill his sergeant had knocked him down by a blow in the face and then kicked him in the knee. The little philosopher was a good deal of a dreamer and had failed in strict and prompt attention. To strike down and boot the rank and file are, of course, a normal part of Prussian army discipline.
ADAY or two later, another small tragedy hit Villa Elsa, right after the unfortunate departure of Tekla. Ernst came home at lunchtime with his face swollen in reds and purples, barely able to walk. During his morning drill, his sergeant had knocked him down with a punch to the face and then kicked him in the knee. The little philosopher was quite the dreamer and hadn’t shown the strict and prompt attention that was expected. Striking down and kicking the ranks are, of course, a normal part of Prussian army discipline.
Kirtley was incensed, horrified. But to his amazement the family sided with the officer. Although Ernst stood in grave danger of being crippled for life, they were ugly in their censures of him. They said it was a good thing to bring him down from the clouds.
Kirtley was furious and shocked. But to his surprise, the family supported the officer. Even though Ernst was at serious risk of being permanently disabled, they harshly criticized him. They claimed it was a good thing to ground him.
[257]The poor little fellow was a pitiable object for some time. He not only suffered painfully from his bruises but had to meet the irate looks and casehardened bearing of his parents. Brutality made soldiers of visionary and idealistic temperaments. It kept the feet on the earth.
[257]The poor little guy was a sad sight for a while. He not only hurt badly from his bruises but also had to deal with the angry stares and tough demeanor of his parents. Brutality turned dreamy and idealistic people into soldiers. It kept their feet on the ground.
Gard thought how differently an American father and mother would act. Their sons belonged to them and they would resent any outside interference that smacked of cruelty. In Germany, the boys, as already observed, belonged essentially to the Government. The vicious treatment of German children in the home, at school, in the army, accounts for the unique Teuton institution of child-suicide. The number of these boys and girls who, because of their hardships, destroy themselves in despair, is shockingly great. The statistics in other races offer little in comparison.
Gard thought about how differently an American dad and mom would act. Their sons belonged to them, and they would be upset about any outside interference that felt cruel. In Germany, the boys, as already noted, essentially belonged to the Government. The cruel treatment of German children at home, in school, and in the army explains the disturbing trend of child suicide in Germany. The number of these boys and girls who, due to their struggles, take their own lives out of despair is shockingly high. The statistics for other races are minimal in comparison.
To break down the will by abasing youth before its comrades and elders, to lay its self-respect low, to beat dignified individuality into callous insensibility, manufactured a docile, automatic unit for the German mechanism. The peculiar strength of Deutschland lay in this early control and training of its[258] young. And as the young surrendered their unimportant consciousness as individuals, they gained an important consciousness as factors in the State. For this reason, as they learned to be almost servile among their own folk, they became domineering among foreigners.
To undermine individual will by humiliating youth in front of their peers and elders, to lower their self-esteem, and to force dignified individuality into a numb conformity created a compliant, automatic part of the German system. The unique strength of Germany was in this early control and training of its[258] young people. As the youth gave up their less important sense of self as individuals, they developed a more significant awareness of their role in the State. Because of this, as they learned to be nearly submissive among their own people, they became overbearing with outsiders.
Villa Elsa now was true to the adage that misfortunes do not come or loom singly. One forenoon, about the middle of June, Kirtley was sitting in his attic, turning over in his mind the fact that his year in Germany would soon be up, and endeavoring to explain why he felt depressed. The recent events, it was true, had created a very unpleasant condition of mind, but his body itself also seemed to share in the inharmony. A dullness, a heaviness, had begun to weigh upon his physique and yet here were summer, Nature, the green earth, rejoicing all about him. It was odd. What was the full explanation?
Villa Elsa was living proof of the saying that troubles never come alone. One morning, around the middle of June, Kirtley was sitting in his attic, mulling over the fact that his year in Germany was coming to an end, and trying to figure out why he felt so down. Recent events had definitely left him in a bad state of mind, but his body also seemed to reflect this disharmony. A dullness, a heaviness, had settled over him, even though summer, Nature, and the lush green earth were all around him, celebrating. It was strange. What was the complete explanation?
As he sat there thinking somewhat dolefully about himself and forgetting his opened books, a loud knock was heard at his door. It was Frau Bucher with her knitting. She had never honored him with a call in his room. Something must be the matter.
As he sat there feeling a bit sorry for himself and forgetting about his open books, a loud knock came at his door. It was Frau Bucher with her knitting. She had never dropped by to see him in his room before. Something must be wrong.
[259]At his invitation she came in and sank into a chair. Her face and hair were mussed. She was laboring under a great strain. The sons with their ill-luck had troubled her. The recent mishaps had evidently alarmed her, upset her, so that it was now the daughter filling the mother's anxious hours.
[259]At his invitation, she entered and collapsed into a chair. Her face and hair were disheveled. She was clearly under a lot of stress. Her sons' bad luck had worried her. The recent incidents had clearly shaken her up, leaving the daughter to fill the mother's worried hours.
"Your daughter—Fräulein Elsa!" Gard exclaimed in astonishment.
"Your daughter—Miss Elsa!" Gard exclaimed in disbelief.
"Yes, my poor daughter. Oh, good Herr Kirtley, you have always been so kind. I have treated you this winter like a son—just like my own sons."
"Yes, my poor daughter. Oh, good Mr. Kirtley, you have always been so kind. I've treated you this winter like a son—just like my own sons."
"You have been very good to me, Frau Bucher," interpolated Kirtley, hastening to offer any consolation, although he could not imagine what distress had brought her to him.
"You've been really great to me, Frau Bucher," Kirtley said quickly, trying to offer some comfort, even though he couldn’t understand what kind of trouble had led her to him.
"Well, my daughter—you know it has always been the intention that she marry Friedrich—ever since they were almost children. But, mein Gott, the poor Friedrich does not arrive at anything. We love him. All our friends love him—admire him. But he can get no fixed position. We wait, he waits, Elsa waits. Always hopes and more hopes and nothing comes. And he is so disappointed. No Kapellmeistership. Only[260] small engagements which do not pay much and soon end. He has no money and what little we have to give with Elsa will not answer until he is permanently established.
"Well, my daughter—you know it has always been the plan for her to marry Friedrich—ever since they were practically kids. But, oh my God, the poor Friedrich just isn't getting anywhere. We love him. All our friends love him—admire him. But he can't land a steady job. We wait, he waits, Elsa waits. Always hoping and more hoping, and nothing happens. And he is so disappointed. No Kapellmeister position. Just[260] small gigs that don’t pay much and soon wrap up. He has no money, and the little we can provide for Elsa won't be enough until he gets a stable job."
"You see Friedrich is a courageous fellow and he is apt to speak his mind. You remember how he mimicked the military. My husband and I think he makes enemies by his impulsive temper. You know what musicians are. They talk right out. We think his enemies put difficulties in his way. And so nothing is settled. We keep waiting and here we are. Elsa wants to marry. She wants children!" exploded the artless Frau.
"You see, Friedrich is a brave guy and he tends to speak his mind. Remember how he parodied the military? My husband and I think he makes enemies because of his impulsive nature. You know how musicians are—they speak openly. We think his enemies create obstacles for him. So, nothing gets resolved. We just keep waiting, and here we are. Elsa wants to get married. She wants kids!" the earnest Frau exclaimed.
The abruptness of this confession in the matter-of-fact German way almost overcame Gard with embarrassment. He recovered himself at length to ask:
The suddenness of this confession in the straightforward German way almost made Gard feel embarrassed. He eventually composed himself enough to ask:
"Does she love him?"
"Does she love him?"
"Ach Himmel! does she love him? Haven't you seen her so dumb at times? But nothing comes to pass—and when will there be anything? She gets her grumpy spells over these postponements—always postponements. You know young people are impatient. They don't understand such things. She wants to marry. Every young girl wants to marry and[261] have children. I may die. My husband may die at any time. And she won't be settled for life."
"Goodness! Does she actually love him? Haven't you noticed how quiet she gets sometimes? But nothing ever happens—and when will it? She gets really moody about all these delays—always delays. You know how young people are; they're so impatient. They just don’t get it. She wants to get married. Every young girl wants to marry and[261] have kids. I could die. My husband could die at any moment. And she won't be set for life."
The mother went off in a vigorous scene of upheaval. The slender and youthful Kirtley felt himself unequal to the task of trying to comfort her bulky person with its commotions.
The mother left in a flurry of chaos. The slim and youthful Kirtley felt overwhelmed by the challenge of trying to soothe her large, agitated figure.
"But what do you want me to do? Frau Bucher?"
"But what do you want me to do? Mrs. Bucher?"
"We all love America, Herr Kirtley!" she burst out. "Elsa loves America. Ever since that splendid Herr Deming came, we love America. And we feel we can trust you. Young men ought to marry early. Elsa wants a decent husband and a decent little home. That is not much to ask. Of course we would hate to have her go so far away. But you have always been so kind to her. You have shown such interest in her. And what a good girl Elsa is! We have brought her up so carefully—and to be a good wife. She can cook and sew and keep house. She can play and paint, and also sing a little. She is strong, never sick, and can work—work. All you Americans have money. We Germans are poor. We can't give her much for a dowry.[262] Excuse me, Herr Kirtley, but you see I came naturally to you. Who else is there? We have made a son of you this winter." Then Frau Bucher almost shrieked out:
"We all love America, Mr. Kirtley!" she exclaimed. "Elsa loves America. Ever since that wonderful Mr. Deming came, we've loved America. And we feel we can trust you. Young men should marry early. Elsa wants a good husband and a nice little home. That’s not too much to ask. Of course, we would hate to see her go so far away. But you have always been so kind to her. You’ve shown such interest in her. And what a good girl Elsa is! We have raised her so carefully—to be a good wife. She can cook, sew, and manage a household. She can play, paint, and even sing a little. She is strong, never sick, and can truly work. All you Americans have money. We Germans are poor. We can't provide her much for a dowry.[262] Excuse me, Mr. Kirtley, but you see, I naturally came to you. Who else is there? We’ve already made a son of you this winter." Then Mrs. Bucher almost shouted:
"And you can stay here always, if you prefer that!"
"And you can stay here forever, if you want!"
Full of her brave endeavor the mother bolted through the door without any ceremony of leave-taking.
Full of her brave determination, the mother rushed through the door without any formal goodbye.
Gard could not collect his tumultuous thoughts there in the room. At last the whole secret was out. Had she not foresightedly kept it so long with some such purpose in view?
Gard couldn’t gather his chaotic thoughts in that room. At last, the whole secret was revealed. Had she not cleverly held onto it for so long with some purpose in mind?
Fresh air was the only place for him. He grabbed his hat to escape other fateful contingencies that morning, and made for the pine park where it was silent and cool. He walked hastily, with his hat off, along the path where Elsa and he used to stroll while conning together the passionate lyrics of the passionate Heine.
Fresh air was the only place for him. He grabbed his hat to avoid other unfortunate situations that morning and headed for the pine park, where it was quiet and cool. He walked quickly, with his hat off, along the path where he and Elsa used to wander while reciting the passionate lyrics of the passionate Heine.
CHAPTER XXXIII
A Server's Dance
HE went on and on through the firs and hemlocks, on the right bank of the Elbe, then down toward the city. A multitude of convictions, reflections, impressions, flocked in his brain. After awhile he seemed to send them all scattering by exclaiming, "I'll be damned!"
HE kept walking through the firs and hemlocks, on the right bank of the Elbe, then headed down toward the city. A swirl of beliefs, thoughts, and impressions filled his mind. After a bit, he seemed to send them all flying away by exclaiming, "I'll be damned!"
They turbulently regathered. There was the sensual ape Von Tielitz—they would marry her to him. She could love him, polluted and swinish in the low sinks of womankind. There was the flatulent Jim Deming with his money—she could quickly marry him. And at last the ideals Gard had nourished about her had finally tumbled to the ground that day in her mother's crude offer of bargain and sale.
They came back together in chaos. There was the sensual ape Von Tielitz—they would marry her off to him. She could love him, tainted and grotesque among women. Then there was the obnoxious Jim Deming with his cash—she could easily marry him. And finally, the ideals Gard had held about her had come crashing down that day with her mother's crude proposal of trade and sale.
These Germans! They were outside the pale. They were the midway people between bar[264]baric Asia and the civilized West. America, millions, pigs, morals, love, brutality, erudition, proficiency, obscenity—the Teuton race mixed them all up hopelessly, without rime or reason.
These Germans! They were outside the norm. They were the middle ground between barbaric Asia and the civilized West. America, millions, pigs, morals, love, brutality, knowledge, skill, obscenity—the German race mixed them all up in a confusing way, without rhyme or reason.
Gard walked and walked without realizing he was becoming tired. As he neared the city he burst out again with, "I'll be damned!" It was all the résumé he could arrive at. He found himself finally hungry and made his way to Fritzi's little inn. He felt almost beaten out. Was he really well?
Gard walked and walked, not noticing that he was getting tired. As he got closer to the city, he exclaimed, "I'll be damned!" That was all he could come up with. He suddenly felt hungry and headed to Fritzi's small inn. He felt almost defeated. Was he really okay?
The middle of the afternoon had come. There she was fresh, free, like a hardy wild flower. She trotted back and forth, curtseying, chattering, with her merry heels clicking on the tiling. The hot sausages and Lebkuchen and a stein were hastened in, and she switched her short skirts down cosily on a bench in front of him to knit and look out after his needs. He had encouraged such opportunities for the practice of conversation.
The middle of the afternoon had arrived. There she was, fresh and free, like a tough wildflower. She trotted back and forth, curtsying, chatting, her cheerful heels clicking on the tiles. The hot sausages, Lebkuchen, and a stein were brought in quickly, and she settled cozily onto a bench in front of him, ready to knit and tend to his needs. He had welcomed these chances to practice conversation.
"I've been looking for you to come in," she lisped.
"I’ve been waiting for you to come in," she said.
"Why?"
"Why?"
"I wanted to ask you to buy a ticket for our Waitress Dance, and I did not know[265] at all where you lived." It was a long sentence for her and she giggled.
"I wanted to ask you to buy a ticket for our Waitress Dance, and I didn't even know[265] where you lived at all." It was a long sentence for her, and she giggled.
"Number 5, Wiesenstrasse, Loschwitz."
"5 Wiesenstrasse, Loschwitz."
"Gott im Himmel! That's way off."
"Wow! That's way off."
"When is your dance?"
"When is your dance?"
"It's to-night. And it's only twelve marks." She fumbled out a ticket from beneath her white apron with a maid's agitation.
"It's tonight. And it's only twelve marks." She nervously pulled out a ticket from beneath her white apron.
"I'll take it," said Gard.
"I'll take it," Gard said.
"But you have to promise to go. They want every ticket holder to go."
"But you have to promise to attend. They want every ticket holder to be there."
"Are you going?"
"Are you heading out?"
"Of course I'm going. It's all us waitresses. And it's only once a year. The waiters have theirs twice a year."
"Of course I'm going. It's all of us waitresses. And it only happens once a year. The waiters have theirs twice a year."
"And are you going to dance?"
"And are you going to dance?"
"Of course I'm going to dance. I always dance." She perked up her head with her young red mouth open in almost childish puzzlement, as much as to say, "Why, what are balls for?"
"Of course I'm going to dance. I always dance." She lifted her head, her young red lips parted in almost childlike confusion, as if to say, "What do you think balls are for?"
Gard looked down on his fattening supply of smoking sausages and honey cakes. A servants' ball might be just the thing to cure his disgust with Loschwitz—with himself—with everything. He had heard Friedrich, Messer and Jim Deming exclaim enthusias[266]tically about these popular fêtes. They should not, it appeared, be missed if one wanted to see the real German nature let loose.
Gard looked down at his growing stash of smoking sausages and honey cakes. A servants' ball might be just the thing to shake off his disgust with Loschwitz—with himself—with everything. He had heard Friedrich, Messer, and Jim Deming enthusiastically talk about these popular parties. Apparently, they were not to be missed if you wanted to see the true German spirit unleashed.
"Well, if you're going to dance, I'll go," he promised.
"Okay, if you’re going to dance, I’ll go,” he promised.
"You bet your life I'm going to dance!" Fritzi cried out in the Saxon dialect's equivalent as she sprang up, and wheeled off to wait on a new visitor. When she had served him she sidled back to Gard's table with a doubting, half-disappointed air.
"You bet I'm going to dance!" Fritzi shouted in the Saxon dialect as she jumped up and went to greet a new customer. After serving him, she returned to Gard's table with a hesitant, somewhat disappointed look.
"You're fooling me." She stuck her tongue out on her upper lip in peasant bashfulness.
"You're messing with me." She playfully stuck her tongue out on her upper lip in a shy, down-to-earth way.
"No, I'll be there as sure as I'm now paying for the ticket." He filled her fat hand with the coins which it could hardly hold. She went away happy.
"No, I'll definitely be there, just like I'm paying for this ticket." He filled her chubby hand with coins that it could barely hold. She left feeling happy.
The ball did not begin until ten, to give the young ladies time to finish their dining-room duties and dress. Kirtley went to a café and watched the billiards until after dark, then slipped out to Villa Elsa, jumped into his evening clothes, and slipped away again. He had seen the royalty dance. Now he would see the common people. This bustling about was cheering. He was glad to go.
The ball didn't start until ten, allowing the young ladies enough time to finish their chores in the dining room and get dressed. Kirtley went to a café and watched billiards until it got dark, then headed over to Villa Elsa, changed into his evening clothes, and quietly left again. He had watched the royalty dance. Now, he was going to see the regular folks. All this activity was uplifting. He was happy to go.
[267]The ball room was big, barn-like, with green branches and cheap flowers strung about. Aprons, napkins, table cloths, bills of fare, and other insignia of the waitress profession filled in the local color of the decorations on the walls. There was not one of the everlasting Verbotens to be seen. Alcoves containing tables and chairs ranged around.
[267]The ballroom was large and spacious, resembling a barn, with green branches and inexpensive flowers hanging around. Aprons, napkins, tablecloths, menus, and other symbols of the waitress profession contributed to the local feel of the wall decorations. There wasn't a single one of the endless Verbotens in sight. Alcoves with tables and chairs were arranged around the room.
The entertainment was in full fling when Gard arrived. As the night was warm the doors and windows were open wide, and fully as many people seemed outside as inside. The throng included a number of students. The dancing was everywhere—on the grass, in the doorways, in the dressing rooms, on the stage by the orchestra. How free and easy compared with the Court affair!
The party was in full swing when Gard showed up. Since it was a warm night, the doors and windows were wide open, and there seemed to be just as many people outside as inside. The crowd included a bunch of students. People were dancing everywhere—on the grass, in the doorways, in the dressing rooms, on the stage by the orchestra. It felt so relaxed and casual compared to the Court event!
Kirtley took refuge in an alcove. He fancied he would before long spy Fritzi. She would be the only person he knew. But she discovered him first. She tripped up to him with a green cavalier redolent of salad oil and beer. She was very proud to be able to claim Herr Kirtley for one of her "sales." Foreigners are always distinguished. The music struck up again and off she was whisked without saying Aufwiedersehen.
Kirtley found a spot in an alcove to hide. He thought he’d soon spot Fritzi, the only person he recognized. But she spotted him first. She danced over to him wearing a green coat that smelled of salad oil and beer. She was really proud to say she had landed Herr Kirtley as one of her "clients." Foreigners always stand out. The music started up again, and off she went without even saying goodbye.
[268]She next came up hanging on to the arms of two dancers. More introductions. All were getting sweaty and thirsty. Gard invited them to sit and he provided Schultheiss.
[268]She then arrived, holding onto the arms of two dancers. More introductions followed. Everyone was getting sweaty and thirsty. Gard invited them to sit down and offered them Schultheiss.
Fritzi soon settled upon this spot as headquarters, twirling off into the figures and returning with different companions. She brought a girl whom she wanted specially to meet the Herr. The girls dived into the alcove, then out, back again, and hung about flustered, by turns bold or backward. They did not know whether it was proper to see that he danced. He was, of course, high above their class, but if he didn't wish to dance, why had he come? Fritzi wanted to be polite but the situation was above her etiquette. He had been so kind as to buy a ticket, and how could he have a good time without joining in the festivities? The girls nudged each other, balked and snickered.
Fritzi quickly decided this spot would be their base, spinning off into the crowd and coming back with different friends. She brought a girl she particularly wanted to introduce to the Herr. The girls jumped into the alcove, then out, and back in again, feeling flustered, alternating between being bold and shy. They weren't sure if it was appropriate to see him dance. He was definitely above their social standing, but if he didn’t want to dance, why was he there? Fritzi wanted to be respectful, but the situation was beyond her sense of etiquette. He had been kind enough to buy a ticket, so how could he enjoy himself without joining in the fun? The girls poked each other, hesitated, and giggled.
Gard saw Fritzi's awkward restraint and set her at rest by saying:
Gard noticed Fritzi's uncomfortable hesitation and reassured her by saying:
"I can't dance the German way."
"I can't dance like the Germans do."
"The German way?" she echoed bluntly. "Why, I thought everybody in the world danced alike."
"The German way?" she replied straightforwardly. "I thought everyone in the world danced the same."
[269]"We don't whirl round and round as you do," Gard explained.
[269] "We don't spin around like you do," Gard explained.
"Well, I'll swear!" she clucked incredulously, her tongue in her cheek as if saying, "What sort of dancing can that be!"
"Well, I can't believe it!" she exclaimed incredulously, her tongue in her cheek as if saying, "What kind of dancing is that!"
The dust and streams of perspiration began to affect everyone, but the music and revolving exertions grew more rapid and vigorous as the hours advanced. Beetles and bugs sailed through the air along with the familiar German odors that greeted Kirtley's nostrils. Everyone became freer. Enjoyment ran higher. Men shed their coats and women made themselves equally comfortable. It was beer, beer, beer.
The dust and sweat started getting to everyone, but the music and the dancing became faster and more energetic as the hours went by. Beetles and bugs flew through the air alongside the familiar German scents that hit Kirtley's nose. Everyone loosened up. The fun levels soared. Men took off their coats, and women got just as comfortable. It was all about beer, beer, beer.
When Fritzi had seen that her Herr was not to take part, she began to behave toward him with a more bluff unconventionality. She made him acquainted with all her partners and girl friends. She confided to him the little jingling trinkets she wore. Her face ablaze, her hair tousled, her feet keeping on the floor with difficulty, she looked to Gard like a flaming mænad. She had come in cheap satin, and also in silk hose which she particularly doted on. But like all thrifty German maids, after two or three dances she divested herself[270] of these and put on stouter stuffs which she had brought along and which could stand the wear and tear. The possession of those finer things had first to be shown to gratify vanity. Then recourse was had to a practical basis for physical pleasure.
When Fritzi realized her boss wasn’t going to join in, she started acting toward him with a more straightforward casualness. She introduced him to all her dance partners and girlfriends. She shared the little jingling trinkets she wore. With her face glowing, her hair messy, and her feet struggling to stay on the floor, she looked to Gard like a fiery wild woman. She had come in cheap satin and silk stockings that she particularly loved. But like all frugal German girls, after two or three dances, she took those off and put on sturdier clothes she had brought with her that could handle the wear and tear. She needed to show off the finer things to satisfy her vanity first. Then she switched to a practical outfit for sheer enjoyment.
Gard mused over the seething picture before him. He knew it had been pointed out that while the Germans are lewd, they are not dissolute. They do not let their duties suffer. Their ample physiques can stand hard strains, and a night of revelry is followed next day by a prompt resumption of tasks. These young folk, tearing about like disheveled satyrs and nymphs, would be at their jobs in the morning.
Gard pondered the chaotic scene in front of him. He realized that it had been noted that while the Germans are indulgent, they aren’t irresponsible. They don’t let their responsibilities slide. Their strong bodies can handle tough demands, and a night of partying is quickly followed by a return to work the next day. These young people, running around like wild satyrs and nymphs, would be back at their jobs in the morning.
The Teuton does not waste his patrimony in riotous living or lead a lawless existence. To this extent the influence of the Government, in its way, was felt. While it recognized that the forceful animal spirits of its people must be indulged to keep them contentedly in control, it set its face against waste of time and of belongings in any prolonged habits of dissipation. Thus the strength and material resources, the plodding industry and economy,[271] of the race were conserved as well as energized.
The Teuton doesn’t squander his heritage on extravagant living or lead a chaotic life. In this way, the Government's influence was evident. While it understood that the vigorous nature of its people needed to be indulged to keep them satisfied and in check, it opposed wasting time and resources on any long-term habits of indulgence. This way, the strength and material resources, along with the hard work and frugality,[271] of the people were both preserved and energized.
As for the German women, they are not naturally passionate in the ordinary emotional and imaginative acceptation of this word. Their passions are not extended by any radical complications of romance or ideality. In a sense, they keep their heads in any indulgence.
As for German women, they aren't naturally passionate in the usual emotional and imaginative sense of the word. Their passions don't get complicated by any intense elements of romance or idealism. In a way, they stay level-headed during any indulgence.
CHAPTER XXXIV
Sparkling wine
AT midnight Kirtley saw a remarkable sight. On the stroke of twelve, loud toasts to Der Tag were suddenly lifted high in air as the orchestra broke forth with the Wacht am Rhein. An uproar seized the assembly. "Gott scourge England! Down with France! Deutschland über Alles!" In a twinkling it was a crowd mad for war. Beer mugs were smashed, various objects of apparel were flung far and wide. Improvised orators—students—mounted tables and began crying for vengeance on the world in speeches which, in the hubbub, did not get much beyond preliminary exclamations.
AT midnight, Kirtley witnessed an incredible scene. Right at twelve, loud toasts to Der Tag were suddenly raised high as the orchestra started playing Wacht am Rhein. An uproar took over the crowd. "God punish England! Down with France! Germany above all!" In an instant, it became a mob eager for war. Beer mugs were smashed, and various articles of clothing were thrown everywhere. Makeshift speakers—students—climbed onto tables and began shouting for revenge on the world in speeches that, amid the chaos, hardly got past initial shout-outs.
Hatred of Great Britain stood out above it all. How long must the Fatherland be held in check? "Der Kaiser! Hoch der Kaiser!" The popular national frenzy had in this spot[273] ripped off any bounds. Burn, sack, violate, kill—Gard heard the intimations—the threats—of all such frightfulness. In the furor he stood up on his table to get a better view of the extraordinary demonstration. It sounded fateful, terrible, like descriptions recited of the French Revolution. He was almost awestruck. At its height he feared personal violence for himself. He had sometimes been taken for a Britisher.
Hatred for Great Britain overshadowed everything else. How long would the Fatherland be held back? "Long live the Kaiser!" The public's patriotic frenzy had in this moment[273] completely torn down any limitations. Burn, loot, attack, kill—Gard felt the whispers—the threats—of all that horror. In the chaos, he stood up on his table to get a better view of the incredible demonstration. It felt ominous, terrifying, like the accounts told of the French Revolution. He was almost in awe. At its peak, he became afraid of being personally attacked. He had sometimes been mistaken for a Britisher.
Anderson was right again. The Teutons lusted for war now. What a spectacle! The old, old German hate. This very lowly class of people—waiters and waitresses—had nothing, would be the very first to face severe hardships, and the men would suffer more than any at the front. They would all be mainly the ones to go hungry, be cold, be killed. But here appeared the cannon fodder demanding to be shot down in its craze for Triumphant Germany. It was hoarse for Victory or Destruction. It was drunk with its physical power. These soldiers were angrily impatient to be let loose like hellhounds, from the sullen fastnesses of mountains and swamps behind the Rhine, upon the Christian populations beyond in the great plains of civilization.
Anderson was right again. The Germans were eager for war now. What a sight! The long-standing German animosity. This very lowly class of people—waiters and waitresses—had nothing and would be the first to face severe difficulties, and the men would suffer more than anyone at the front. They would primarily be the ones to go hungry, be cold, and be killed. But here they were, the cannon fodder wanting to be sent to their deaths in their madness for Triumphant Germany. They were desperate for Victory or Destruction. They were intoxicated with their physical power. These soldiers were angrily impatient to be unleashed like hellhounds from the gloomy hideouts of mountains and swamps behind the Rhine, onto the Christian populations in the vast plains of civilization.
[274]When the tempest had passed and its activities were dwindling into the renewed whirlwinds of the dance, Gard resumed his seat, his head beginning to swim a little. At last his doubting eyes were as if unsealed. A Vandal tribe, a great and powerful Vandal tribe, still lived in the world. It was feeding on Conflict—the food of its ancient bellicose gods.
[274]When the storm had calmed down and its chaos faded into the ongoing whirlwinds of the dance, Gard took his seat again, his head starting to feel a bit dizzy. Finally, his uncertain eyes seemed to open wide. A Vandal tribe, a large and powerful Vandal tribe, was still alive in the world. It was thriving on Conflict—the sustenance of its ancient warlike gods.
How was it, indeed, that our trained American observers, men who had been educated in Germany and those who had not, never saw anything of this danger that was boiling in the breasts of even the humblest classes of Teutons? Yes, Anderson was correct. The Germans were, after all, frank enough about it. All was spontaneous and bold. Egged on by their military, political, educational, religious masters, the populace could easily, at any time, work themselves up like this into a frantic state about conquest. And yet Americans heard nothing of it. It was as if their channels of information were subsidized under German authority.
How was it that our trained American observers, both those who had studied in Germany and those who hadn’t, completely missed the danger that was brewing even among the lowest classes of Germans? Yes, Anderson was right. The Germans were quite open about it. Everything was spontaneous and assertive. Encouraged by their military, political, educational, and religious leaders, the public could easily whip themselves into a frenzy about conquest at any time. And yet, Americans heard nothing about it. It was as if their sources of information were being controlled by German authorities.
At one o'clock supper time came and Gard ordered. There were Fritzi and another girl and two young men—all very profuse in their appreciation of his hospitality. The popping[275] of a few bottles of cheap champagne sounded in his ears. He was in the swing of the excitement and could not be outdone. His brand was French, of a fine quality. It exhilarated his brain far above the plain, distorted commonplaces of Loschwitz.
At one o'clock, it was time for dinner, and Gard placed the order. Fritzi was there along with another girl and two young men, all eagerly expressing their gratitude for his hospitality. The sound of a few bottles of cheap champagne popping filled the air. He was caught up in the excitement and didn’t want to be outdone. His choice was a fine quality French brand. It lifted his spirits far above the usual, mundane surroundings of Loschwitz.
After supper the real frolic set in. The true devotees now alone remained. They began doing fancy twists, with legs out far and wide. Vests came off, with collars and ties, and feminine charms became as familiar as an old story that is read too often to have much meaning for the senses. To Gard it all now appeared seemly enough, like an opera peasant ballet whose frank rusticities were excused under the inspiration of the music.
After dinner, the real fun began. Only the true fans were left. They started showing off fancy moves, legs spread wide. Vests came off, along with collars and ties, and the allure of the women felt as familiar as an old story that’s been told too many times to hold any real interest. To Gard, everything now seemed perfectly fine, like a peasant ballet in an opera, where the simple, bold actions were forgiven because of the music.
Fritzi's hair floated loosely over her shoulders. It looked to him even brighter than Elsa's. Her snug, many-colored bodice became partly unlaced and she had kicked off her tight slippers under Gard's table. In their heated condition many of the other waitresses were dancing in their unshod feet. He thought it very natural and pleasing when Fritzi rushed up with her heirloom of silk stockings which she had removed early in the evening. They had been her grandmother's[276] who had worn them at some grand baron's wedding long ago—the sole tradition and distinction connected with Fritzi's lineage. One of her friends had been robbed in the dressing room and she was afraid to trust these precious articles there longer. She made sure that Gard had tucked them in his pocket for safekeeping. As she hurried to rejoin the circles, he saw that she had worn through the bottoms of her dancing hose.
Fritzi's hair hung loosely over her shoulders. To him, it seemed even brighter than Elsa's. Her snug, multicolored bodice had come partially unlaced, and she had kicked off her tight slippers under Gard's table. In a lively mood, many of the other waitresses were dancing barefoot. He found it completely natural and enjoyable when Fritzi rushed up with her cherished silk stockings that she had taken off earlier in the evening. They had belonged to her grandmother, who wore them at some fancy baron's wedding long ago—the only tradition and distinction linked to Fritzi's family. One of her friends had been robbed in the dressing room, and she was worried about leaving these precious items there any longer. She made sure that Gard had tucked them into his pocket for safekeeping. As she hurried to rejoin the group, he noticed that the bottoms of her dancing stockings were worn through.
Whenever that feeling of discomfort, which he had been conscious of early that morning, surged for a moment through him, a sip of champagne brought quick relief and gilded the scene and his spirits with its necromancy. He felt dizzy but blissful. He became drowsy.... He had sunk into a dream, glorious then ugly, foolish but haunting.
Whenever that feeling of discomfort, which he had noticed early that morning, surged through him for a moment, a sip of champagne brought quick relief and made everything look beautiful while lifting his spirits. He felt dizzy but happy. He became sleepy.... He had drifted into a dream, beautiful then ugly, silly but lingering.
He dreamed he was an armored knight of the time of Charlemagne. He was astride a steed caparisoned for battle, and was riding southward from the Alps in the blazing sunlight, along a white road amid what he supposed were the gardened plains of Lombardy. By his side, in similar array, rode a lovely blond princess of the North with a wonderful luxuriance of hair—some daughter of the[277] Frankish race of fierce and resplendent Brunnhildas or Fredegondas.
He dreamed he was an armored knight from the time of Charlemagne. He was riding a battle-ready horse, heading south from the Alps in the bright sunlight, along a white road that he thought led through the lush plains of Lombardy. Next to him rode a beautiful blonde princess from the North, her hair wonderfully luxurious—some daughter of the [277] Frankish lineage of fierce and radiant Brunnhildas or Fredegondas.
She at last became wearied of her heavy armor, the length of the journey and the burning sun. He assisted in extricating her from her coat of mail, and took her over into his arms asleep, letting her armor ride upright on her charger save for the helmet which he fastened to his pommel. As the horses kept onward he held with delight her lightsome body, with her miraculous tresses entwining him as she slumbered. He held her embraced in tenderness, for had not she—a princess—trusted him and gone away with him alone?
She finally grew tired of her heavy armor, the long journey, and the blazing sun. He helped her out of her suit of armor and lifted her into his arms while she slept, leaving her armor upright on her horse except for the helmet, which he secured to his saddle. As the horses continued on, he happily held her light body, with her beautiful hair wrapping around him as she dozed. He held her close with affection, since she—a princess—had trusted him and chosen to leave with him alone.
He had not thus ridden with her far, before his eyes, alert in every direction for the treacherous enemies of the land, beheld with gaping fright an immense black serpent, brilliant with scales glistening in the scintillating air, slowly uncoiling out of her headless panoply that was still riding bolt upright by his side. He glared down at her in the certainty that she had turned into a twin serpent at his breast. She lay there still in the seductive form of a woman. But she had turned loathsome to his touch. He hurled her to the ground and the[278] next moment was flying on foot, afield, in horror from the spot.
He hadn't ridden with her long when his eyes, scanning every direction for the hidden enemies of the land, saw with terror an enormous black serpent, its scales shining in the dazzling air, slowly uncoiling from her headless armor that was still standing upright beside him. He glared down at her, convinced that she had transformed into a twin serpent at his side. She remained there in the alluring form of a woman. But she had become repulsive to his touch. He threw her to the ground, and the[278] next moment, he was running away in horror from that place.
And he recalled in his dream how woman and the snake have been allied in legend, religion and history—how they have ever been identified in the minds of men. His beautiful queen had been at one with the serpent in that suit of metal. Or was it only Elsa?—was it only Fritzi?—with their amber hair?
And he remembered in his dream how women and snakes have been connected in stories, religion, and history—how they have always been linked in people's minds. His beautiful queen had been united with the serpent in that metal outfit. Or was it just Elsa?—was it just Fritzi?—with their amber hair?
For what seemed a very long time he was fitfully trying to decide—when he slowly made out that brawny Frau Bucher stood over him.
For what felt like a really long time, he was sporadically trying to decide—when he slowly realized that the strong Frau Bucher was standing over him.
CHAPTER XXXV
Recovery
SHE was in the act of giving him a potion for a raging fever. Once he realized that Herr Bucher sat silently poring over a book by the bed, chucking him back into it when he tossed out. The Bucher children occasionally appeared on errands for his comfort. The family nursed him more diligently than if he had been their own.
SHE was in the process of giving him a potion for a high fever. Once he noticed that Herr Bucher was sitting quietly, deeply focused on a book by the bed, putting him back into it whenever he tried to speak up. The Bucher kids would sometimes come by to run errands for his comfort. The family cared for him more attentively than if he were their own.
Gard came back to his senses rather rapidly. He had found himself in his room. He was in his own bed—that German bed. Summertide was steadily flooding in through the grateful leaves of his linden, and brightening his confining walls. His narrow-gage American digestive apparatus had, it appeared, finally rebelled over the broad German fare. All his eating and drinking during the months had proven disastrous. When he had begun to[280] feel bad that last day, it only needed a little champagne to bring to a head the inevitable revolt. And so, toward the end of his year, he was physically not far from where he had been on coming to Deutschland for the sake of its inspiring virilities.
Gard quickly came back to his senses. He found himself in his room, in his own bed—that German bed. The summer sun was streaming in through the welcoming leaves of his linden tree, brightening up his small space. His usual American digestive system had finally protested against all the heavy German food he’d been eating. The months of indulgence had taken a toll. On that last day, when he started to feel unwell, a little champagne was all it took to trigger the inevitable upset. So, as his year came to an end, he was in pretty much the same physical state as when he had arrived in Germany, drawn in by its invigorating energy.
He had plenty of time to wonder how he had got back to Loschwitz from the Waitress Dance. He never inquired, never learned. But Fritzi alone knew his address. He had no recollection of anything. He went through his pockets. His valuables were intact. His money was all there as nearly as he could figure out, except a reasonable amount evidently used to pay the supper bill and convey him home. Truly those considerate servants had not acted like amateurs.
He had plenty of time to think about how he ended up back in Loschwitz from the Waitress Dance. He never asked and never found out. But only Fritzi knew his address. He couldn’t remember anything. He went through his pockets. His valuables were all there. His money seemed mostly untouched, except for a reasonable amount that was obviously used to cover the supper bill and get him home. Honestly, those thoughtful servants didn’t act like amateurs.
He finally remembered about Fritzi's hose. They were gone. At length Frau Bucher said she had forgotten to tell him that a pretty young woman came to reclaim them. He was ashamed enough. To be carried to his room in the odor of champagne and with a girl's silk stockings in his pocket! He—Gard Kirtley! Was this the low estate to which German life had brought him?
He finally remembered Fritzi's hose. They were gone. Eventually, Frau Bucher mentioned that she had forgotten to tell him that a pretty young woman came to get them back. He felt really embarrassed. Being taken to his room smelling of champagne and with a girl's silk stockings in his pocket! He—Gard Kirtley! Was this really the low point that German life had brought him to?
But he soon observed that the Buchers[281] cared nothing about all this. Young men, as we have seen, were expected to go on larks. No one spoke of the distressing occurrence. There was no disagreeable testimony that he had made great trouble. No looks of reproach attacked him. His Puritan habits had been, in fact, very curious to the parents. They felt now that he was a youth whom they could understand. He was true to the proper type.
But he soon noticed that the Buchers[281] didn’t care about any of this. Young men, as we’ve seen, were expected to go off on adventures. No one mentioned the upsetting incident. There was no unpleasant evidence that he had caused any trouble. No disapproving glances were directed at him. His Puritan habits were, in fact, very interesting to the parents. They now felt that he was a young man they could relate to. He fit the right mold.
It was a relief for him to know that he had not dropped in respect before any of the household. He believed he had, on the contrary, grown in their estimation, as had Rudi after his "experience." The poor Herr Kirtley was considered a much abused victim of an unfortunate sickness. Once Frau exclaimed:
It was a relief for him to know that he hadn’t lost respect in front of anyone in the household. He genuinely believed that, instead, he had gained their admiration, just like Rudi had after his "experience." The poor Herr Kirtley was seen as a severely mistreated victim of an unfortunate illness. Once Frau exclaimed:
"Ach Himmel! our sons have such a hard time of it!"
"Ah, heaven! Our sons have it so tough!"
When he began to eat ravenously after his enforced abstinence, hearty foods and heavy drinks were supplied. It is the German fashion at such times to build up the strength quickly with lusty meals. He was started promptly again on the road to gastric ruin.
When he started to eat voraciously after being forced to abstain, filling foods and strong drinks were provided. It’s a German tradition at these times to quickly regain strength with hearty meals. He was soon back on the path to stomach troubles.
Often at night a cold sweat would bead over Gard. What would he do about Frau Bucher[282] and Elsa? He had been thrown helpless into their hands. Holy Smoke! Would he become a German in spite of himself? He sometimes wished the Imperial Secret Service might scare him out of the country as had been the case with the lucky Deming.
Often at night, a cold sweat would bead on Gard. What was he going to do about Frau Bucher[282] and Elsa? He felt completely powerless in their hands. Holy smokes! Would he become a German whether he wanted to or not? Sometimes he wished the Imperial Secret Service would frighten him out of the country like they did with the lucky Deming.
The Buchers had likely saved his life. He had been brought by them faithfully back to health. How was he going to repay? What excuses could he offer when the time came to face Frau's proposal? How could he possibly make his escape at all agreeably? Was ever a fellow in just such a pickle?
The Buchers had probably saved his life. They had faithfully nursed him back to health. How was he going to repay them? What excuses could he make when it came time to deal with Frau's proposal? How could he possibly make his escape without causing a scene? Was there ever a guy in such a predicament?
And here was the ever-capable Elsa dutifully bringing his viands and at times reading to him stories from Hoffmann. She was like a real fairy out of a German story book. The new Heine she had given him lay there, but neither suggested opening it. It was not a thing to get well over.
And here was the always-reliable Elsa faithfully bringing him his meals and sometimes reading him stories by Hoffmann. She felt like a real fairy out of a German fairy tale. The new Heine she had given him was there, but neither of them seemed to want to open it. It was not something to easily recover from.
To a sick man, his nurse seems heavenly. And Elsa looked truly golden as she sat there over the Hoffmann, with the sunlight streaming about her head. In Gard's phantasmagoria at night there had often been a blond maiden, dancing and lovely—but mingled at length into some unpleasant circumstance like[283] that connected with the phantom princess he had ridden with in Italy.
To a sick person, their nurse seems like a goddess. And Elsa looked absolutely radiant as she sat there over the Hoffmann, with sunlight streaming around her head. In Gard's nighttime visions, there had often been a beautiful blonde maiden, dancing and enchanting—but eventually mixed into some unpleasant situation like[283] that was connected to the phantom princess he had traveled with in Italy.
Ernst, still limping from his beating, came in now and then and read out of a ponderous volume on the Relation of German Music to the Reformation. It was full of intricate, plodding, dull detail in the German style, which the lad found of interest. But Gard, despite this kindness, could not make much headway with it. Smoking was, of course, permitted to accompany his man-like return to health, and it was always a genial hour to have Anderson sitting there in the wreaths of nicotine before the summery window, talking, talking.
Ernst, still limping from his beating, would come in now and then and read from a heavy book about the Connection between German Music and the Reformation. It was loaded with complicated, slow-moving, and boring details in the German style, which the young man found interesting. But Gard, despite this kindness, couldn’t get much out of it. Smoking was, of course, allowed to go along with his gradual recovery, and it was always a pleasant time to have Anderson sitting there in the clouds of smoke by the sunny window, chatting away.
The correspondent came several times, bringing comic papers. Gard pleased him by saying he was veering round to the journalist's way of thinking on things German. He related the Der Tag incident at the ball. The family life of the Teutons, the life of the plain people—all were substantiating the essential and alarming truth of the old man's beliefs. At last another American in Germany had been found who was experiencing an awakening. The result was a mutual appreciation.
The correspondent visited several times, bringing comic books. Gard impressed him by saying he was starting to see things from the journalist's perspective about Germany. He shared the Der Tag incident from the party. The everyday lives of the Germans, the lives of the common people—everything was proving the essential and concerning truth of the old man's views. Finally, another American in Germany was discovered who was also having an awakening. The outcome was a shared understanding.
One afternoon they were eating some of[284] the big German cherries, and the fragrance of Herr Bucher's rose garden below was engaged in balmy conflict with the odors of cigars.
One afternoon, they were eating some of[284] the big German cherries, and the scent of Herr Bucher's rose garden below was pleasantly clashing with the smell of cigars.
"Well, what is the solution about the German people?" Gard propounded. "What's to be done with them? Here they are, industrious as bees and as fully armed with stings. Will a war cure anything? Even if defeated, won't they be the same people? Won't they present the same problem? Won't they present the same menace to what we consider as the best and most desirable types of civilization?"
"So, what's the solution for the German people?" Gard asked. "What should we do with them? They're hard-working like bees and just as capable of stinging. Will a war solve anything? Even if defeated, won't they still be the same people? Won't they still pose the same problem? Won't they still threaten what we view as the best and most desirable types of civilization?"
Anderson did not interrupt these questions. When they had all come out, he gravely took another cigar, leisurely lighted it and turned his chair to face the linden at the window. He spoke very mildly.
Anderson didn't interrupt the questions. Once they were all asked, he seriously took another cigar, casually lit it, and turned his chair to face the linden tree by the window. He spoke very softly.
CHAPTER XXXVI
The Germany Issue: A Solution
IHAVE given this a great deal of thought. I have read a great deal and I believe I have never known of a writer who furnished what I should call an answer. And that is the most important thing—the vital thing. So I have evolved a simple, natural proposal. It is the only proposal, I think, that will remedy the evil of the German nation—remedy the ugly situation that hangs over the careless earth.
IHAVE thought about this a lot. I’ve read a lot, and I don’t think I’ve ever come across a writer who provided what I would call an answer. And that’s the most crucial thing—the essential thing. So, I’ve come up with a straightforward, natural proposal. I believe it’s the only solution that will fix the problems of the German nation—resolve the disturbing situation that looms over the indifferent world.
"We know that when young foreigners are educated in considerable part in a country, they generally become at peace with it. Everything, in fact, draws them to this attitude—for instance, their excusable satisfaction in feeling that their sojourn abroad has been a success for them instead of a failure. Any foreign instruction makes the student more of an intelligent, cosmopolitan sympa[286]thizer. It knits together warm acquaintances abroad. Every Rhodes scholar is an ally of England. He goes forth bearing kindly messages for her. I have told you how it works with our Americans coming over here to the German universities. They nearly all become pro-Germanic. And this is one reason why our compatriots at home have in general such a downright admiration for what they consider the super-excellence of the Teutons.
"We know that when young foreigners are educated in significant part in a country, they usually develop a sense of peace with it. Everything encourages this mindset—like their justifiable satisfaction in feeling that their time abroad has been a success rather than a failure. Any foreign education makes the student more of an informed, cosmopolitan supporter. It forges strong connections with friends overseas. Every Rhodes scholar is an ally of England. They leave carrying friendly messages for her. I've mentioned how it works for our Americans studying at German universities. Almost all of them become pro-German. This is one reason why our fellow citizens at home generally have such a strong admiration for what they see as the exceptional qualities of the Germans.
"But while this providing of the German education for Americans is pulling so strong in favor of Germany, we have nothing similar in America pulling Germany toward us and our ways. Young Germans are not sent to the United States to study and to lead our lives and to return home bearing good-will and good reports. They stay where they are and become more narrowly, intrinsically Teutons—irreclaimably Teutons. They are left with the undisputed idea that their system of instruction is altogether the best, as proven by the spectacle of aliens coming here for schooling. Why, then, should German lads and misses go abroad to learn? And they don't.
"But while the German education system is attracting Americans towards Germany, we have nothing similar in the U.S. pulling Germany towards us and our way of life. Young Germans aren't sent to the United States to study, experience our lifestyle, and then return home with goodwill and positive stories. They remain in Germany and become even more tightly connected to their Teutonic roots—unquestionably Teutonic. They are left with the firm belief that their education system is the best, as evidenced by foreigners coming here for schooling. So why should young Germans travel abroad to learn? They don’t."
"Now as long as this state of things continues, the German race will remain a tribe[287] in itself, and radically at loggerheads with the world. It will be hopelessly separated, unreconciled, inimical. It will be strange and opposed to everyone else—everything else. As you have seen yourself, even the meanings of the most common and essential terms are usually, to the German, the contrary of what they are to the rest of mankind.
"Now, as long as this situation continues, the German people will stay a disconnected tribe[287], fundamentally at odds with the world. They will be hopelessly isolated, unyielding, and hostile. They will appear strange and opposed to everyone else—everything else. As you've seen for yourself, even the meanings of the most common and essential terms are often, to the German, the opposite of what they are to the rest of humanity."
"How will there ever be any natural and genuine meeting of the minds, fellowship, community of interests, under present programmes? For centuries civilized countries have been living side by side with the Teutons, have been pursuing education ever more zealously, and still the German brain and character stay profoundly different from the rest and are not understood. They are so different, in fact, that the forces of war and destruction must be maintained as against them and are constant irritants to thought and activity.
"How can there ever be a natural and genuine meeting of minds, fellowship, or a community of interests under the current programs? For centuries, civilized countries have been living alongside the Teutons, pursuing education more actively than ever, yet the German way of thinking and character remain profoundly different from everyone else and are still not understood. They are so different, in fact, that we have to maintain forces of war and destruction against them, which constantly disrupt thought and activity."
"My plan is this. Young German men and women should be amicably educated abroad in very large numbers—the largest well possible. And on a broader basis than the Cecil Rhodes scheme. In our country they would become, from youthful association, more or less fond of our open homes, our sense of democracy,[288] the untrammeled opportunities to go and to do. They would see the advantages of these blessings—or at least their human attraction—among boys and girls.
"My plan is this: young German men and women should be educated abroad in huge numbers—the largest possible. And on a broader scale than the Cecil Rhodes scheme. In our country, they would grow to appreciate our open homes, our sense of democracy,[288] and the unlimited opportunities to explore and achieve. They would recognize the benefits of these blessings—or at least their appealing nature—among their peers."
"Under my programme these Germans, still adolescent, will return home and a little of this foreign education will stick. But their children will do the same. More will stick with them. Then their children, and still more sticking. After fifty or a hundred years you will have a large population in Deutschland thinking and liking and to a great extent living like their Christian and less warlike neighbors. It will be a tremendous beneficial element introduced for the first time into Germany. It will slowly and silently, without friction or loss of self-respect, accomplish an internal revolution.
"Under my program, these young Germans will go back home, and some of this foreign education will stick with them. Their children will experience the same, and more will stick with them. Then their children's children, and even more will stay. After fifty or a hundred years, you'll have a large population in Germany thinking, liking, and largely living like their Christian and less aggressive neighbors. It will be a significant and beneficial influence introduced for the first time in Germany. It will gradually and quietly, without conflict or loss of self-esteem, bring about an internal revolution."
"Foreign education for Teuton boys and girls! That's the only final answer I can find—the only true one. You see, a war will never accomplish this, nor tariffs or penalties. Such agencies do not change human nature or character or modes of existence. They antagonize, make stubborn or resentful or malevolent. And, unlike other races, the Germans would always remain, as they are to-day, UNITED.[289] This is the explanation of their World Power."
"Education abroad for German boys and girls! That's the only final answer I can come up with—the only real one. You see, a war will never achieve this, nor will tariffs or penalties. These measures don’t change human nature, character, or ways of living. They create hostility, make people stubborn, resentful, or even mean. And, unlike other races, the Germans will always remain, as they are today, UNITED.[289] This is the reason for their global influence."
Anderson stopped as if waiting for a comment.
Anderson paused, as if expecting someone to say something.
"It all sounds well and is a beautiful way to do it, but how is it practicable?" asked Gard, who had listened attentively, impressed. "How are you going to coax the Germans to enter into this? What benefit will they see in it?"
"It all sounds great and is a lovely way to go about it, but how is it actually doable?" asked Gard, who had listened closely, clearly impressed. "How are you planning to persuade the Germans to get on board with this? What benefit will they find in it?"
"You are right," returned Anderson. "That's the difficulty at present. It can't be put in operation, as I see it, unless Germany happens to be defeated in the coming war. If she is defeated she will, of course, be humbled and temporarily sick of fighting, and this proposal could then be readily forced into adoption as one of the post-war measures looking to the quickest rehabilitation of the nation. Anything that will put it on its feet again soon will be most welcome at that time. Meanwhile, the instruments of war, the power to do damage, must not be left in the German's hands. As long as he has them, he will prepare to destroy."
"You’re right," Anderson replied. "That’s the issue right now. It can’t be put into action, in my view, unless Germany gets defeated in the upcoming war. If they are defeated, they’ll definitely be humbled and will want a break from fighting, and then this proposal could easily be pushed through as one of the post-war measures aimed at quickly rebuilding the country. Anything that can help it bounce back soon will be greatly appreciated at that point. In the meantime, the tools of war, the ability to cause harm, must not be left in the Germans’ hands. As long as they have them, they’ll be ready to destroy."
"But if Germany is victorious, as you seem to think she will be?" suggested Gard.
"But what if Germany wins, as you seem to think she will?" suggested Gard.
[290]"Oh, then nothing will work. It won't have a chance. What will there be of all this to contemplate? Germany will be the master and its semi-paganism will prevail. The modern Teuton tribes will begin to level the Christian civilizations to the ground just as the Huns leveled the Roman civilization. The Hun disposition in the German must be eradicated—must be destroyed. Until this is done the world will always have these Huns at its gates."...
[290] "Oh, then nothing will work. It won't stand a chance. What will there be to think about in all this? Germany will be in control, and its semi-paganism will take over. The modern German tribes will start to bring down Christian civilizations just like the Huns brought down Roman civilization. The Hun mentality in the German must be eradicated—must be destroyed. Until this happens, the world will always have these Huns at its gates."...
It was now July in the year of everlasting tragedy—1914. Kirtley must leave for home, as Villa Elsa knew. He talked over his route with Anderson. His interest in Charlemagne made him wish to see at Aix-la-Chapelle the great emperor's tomb, underneath which, according to an old-time legend, the ruler still sits in his white robes of state in his marble chair, looking forward to resurrection to power. So the trip was mapped out through central Germany.
It was now July in the year of lasting tragedy—1914. Kirtley had to head home, as Villa Elsa was aware. He discussed his route with Anderson. His interest in Charlemagne made him want to see the great emperor's tomb in Aachen, where, according to an old legend, the ruler still sits in his white robes of state in his marble chair, waiting for his resurrection to power. So, the trip was planned through central Germany.
As the time was at hand for Gard to announce his date of setting off, his perplexities before Frau and Elsa grew entangled. But, happily, their knot was cut for him. Von Tie[291]litz, who had long been away, broke in upon the household one morning with glorious news. He had received a commission as bandmaster in the army with fair pay. Most unexpected. A civilian, who could make sport of the military, summoned into the ranks! What could it mean? Something must be in the wind.
As the time approached for Gard to announce his departure date, his confusion around Frau and Elsa grew. Fortunately, he didn’t have to deal with it alone. Von Tie[291]litz, who had been away for a while, unexpectedly dropped by one morning with exciting news. He had gotten a commission as a bandmaster in the army with a decent salary. It was completely surprising. A civilian, who could joke about the military, was being called into service! What could this mean? Something must be brewing.
At all events he had come to arrange to marry Elsa, and converted the Villa into a hubbub. He was so beside himself that he appeared ready to embrace and marry the first person he met. He was also officious as if conducting a rehearsal. He rushed to Gard's room and overwhelmed him with the tidings. His eye-glasses kept tumbling off. He was upstairs and down, in the flower garden, out at the tea table, and now and then he rushed to the Pleyel and rent the air with its exultant chords.
Anyway, he had come to set up his marriage to Elsa and turned the Villa into a chaotic scene. He was so excited that he seemed ready to hug and marry the first person he encountered. He was also very eager, almost like he was running a rehearsal. He dashed to Gard's room and bombarded him with the news. His glasses kept falling off. He was running around upstairs and downstairs, in the flower garden, out at the tea table, and now and then he would rush to the piano and fill the air with its joyful sounds.
The family turned the day into celebration. The wine cellar was opened. The kitchen sent forth its hot and overflowing dishes hour after hour until well into the evening. The marriageable Jim Deming and Gard Kirtley were to Villa Elsa as if they had never been. Frau proclaimed in husky sounds that she had not felt so young in thirty years. Luckily[292] Fräulein Wasserhaus had gone off to Brunswick to visit a relative soon after Deming's advent, so she was not in Wiesenstrasse to encounter this joyous climax and Gard's preparations for his eventful journey.
The family made the day a celebration. They opened the wine cellar. The kitchen kept sending out hot and overflowing dishes hour after hour until well into the evening. The eligible bachelors Jim Deming and Gard Kirtley were at Villa Elsa as if they had never left. Frau proclaimed in a husky voice that she hadn't felt this young in thirty years. Luckily[292] Fräulein Wasserhaus had gone off to Brunswick to visit a relative soon after Deming's arrival, so she wasn't in Wiesenstrasse to witness this joyous peak and Gard's preparations for his significant journey.
Elsa acted as one overjoyed. It was what she had yearned for and what filled the measure of her Teutonic maiden nature. On seeing her happy like a yellow mermaid on a sunlit, blissful shore, and knowing what Friedrich was with all his talent, Gard realized she was never for him or he for her. It had been for him a vagary, an irresponsible venture in ethno-psychology, a poorly based confusion of appreciation with a vague notion of duty intermingled with sentiment.
Elsa acted like someone who was incredibly happy. It was what she had longed for and reflected her Germanic nature. Seeing her joyful, like a yellow mermaid on a sunny, perfect beach, and knowing what Friedrich truly was with all his talent, Gard understood that she would never be for him, nor he for her. For him, it had been a whim, a careless exploration of cultural psychology, a misguided mix of admiration and a vague sense of obligation intertwined with feelings.
His illness had cleared his intuitions. The unalluring defects of the Teuton systems of love-making overshadowed his own defects as a suitor. Elsa had been as truly foreign to him as the German habits of eating and drinking. In thinking of her he now knew he had always been conscious of her nation. The German woman, as he had already learned, is sunk into her race. It swallows up her individuality. In marrying her, one married the whole people—the German State—the[293] Kaiser. One became possessed not only of a help-meet but of an aggressive political idea.
His illness had sharpened his instincts. The unappealing flaws of the German ways of love-making overshadowed his own shortcomings as a suitor. Elsa had seemed as foreign to him as the German customs of eating and drinking. Now, thinking of her, he realized he had always been aware of her nationality. The German woman, as he had already discovered, is deeply rooted in her culture. It consumes her individuality. By marrying her, one marries the entire nation—the German State—the [293] Kaiser. One doesn't just gain a partner but also inherits a strong political identity.
Now that Gard was a friend instead of a lover, how much easier were his relations with Fräulein! Brooding sensitiveness and responsibility passed into lightsomeness. The unnatural and crankling proceeding of his trying to woo a German girl was smoothed away into a genial indifference. The mental picture of Elsa would remain as one that had attracted him on the wall of his German memories. And like the hundred maids that a youth is smitten with, she would gradually blend into the dim gallery of such pleasant visions of Kirtley's susceptible spring-time—visions which, in all men, fade sweetly into their manhood.
Now that Gard was a friend instead of a lover, his interactions with Fräulein became much easier! His brooding sensitivity and sense of responsibility transformed into a lightheartedness. The awkward and clumsy attempts to win over a German girl faded into a relaxed indifference. The image of Elsa would stay with him as one that had captivated him in the landscape of his German memories. And just like the many girls a young man is infatuated with, she would slowly merge into the hazy collection of those enjoyable moments from Kirtley’s impressionable springtime—memories that, for all men, gently fade into their adulthood.
In this manner the cloud of Gard's awkward discomfort in speaking out or acting out his answer to Frau's virile project, had melted away before these lighted-up faces. He felt as if a fog were lifted off his consciousness. He was glad to slip out thus easily. In the lively jumble of robust, rejoicing realities about him, he seemed to have emerged from the fringy edges of a daze.
In this way, Gard's awkward discomfort about speaking up or responding to Frau's bold plan faded away in front of the cheerful faces around him. He felt like a fog had lifted from his mind. He was relieved to escape so easily. In the vibrant mix of lively, joyful realities around him, he felt like he had come out of a haze.
CHAPTER XXXVII
A German "God Be with You"
ADASH of adventure was to crown Gard Kirtley's farewell to Germany as it had crowned Jim Deming's, but with an ominous wreath of the tragic instead of garlands of the comic. War was at hand, yet even Anderson did not see it plainly enough to report it. War was often in the sky in Germany and often had he been fooled. The Teutons must be sure of victory and, he was positive, would avail themselves of a long summer for their campaign.
ADASH of adventure was set to mark Gard Kirtley's farewell to Germany just like it did for Jim Deming, but this time with a dark twist instead of a lighthearted celebration. War was on the horizon, yet even Anderson didn’t see it clearly enough to report it. War frequently loomed in Germany, and he had been misled before. The Germans had to be confident of victory and, he was sure, would take full advantage of a long summer for their campaign.
In those days of July something peculiar and tense hung over the land, but its sources were untraceable, its form, abstract. The unadvised, ordinary people wiped the sweat from their foreheads and said it must be the heat. Kirtley would not have been expected to interpret Friedrich's surprising engagement in the music ranks of the Landwehr as a sign that[295] widespread preparations were being made for the fullest onslaught of which the nation could be capable. The Government was, nevertheless, quietly laying its hands on all its young men—even musicians who were blind in one eye and could not see out of it.
In those days of July, something strange and tense hung over the land, but its origins were unclear and its shape, abstract. Ordinary people wiped the sweat from their foreheads and claimed it must be the heat. Kirtley wouldn’t have thought that Friedrich's unexpected involvement in the music ranks of the Landwehr signified that[295] widespread preparations were underway for the biggest attack the nation could muster. However, the Government was quietly recruiting all its young men—even musicians who were blind in one eye and couldn’t see out of it.
Gard was glad to go home through the heart of Germany. Jena, Weimar, Erfurt, Eisenach!—the land of Goethe, Schiller, Luther. While these figures were discarded from the blatant pageantry of the armed Empire, the landmarks associated with them remained to satisfy the vision, and he could tell of them to dear old ignorant Rebner who would be waiting to hear of his beloved Deutschland which existed no more. Afterward, Heidelberg; the trip down the Rhine to the spires of Cologne; and then Aix at the western border, where that august sovereign slept in a haunting majesty, wrapped in the mystic grandeur of the Dark Ages. It was the most fitting and impressive place on the frontier from which to bid adieu to Germania.
Gard was happy to head home through the heart of Germany. Jena, Weimar, Erfurt, Eisenach!—the land of Goethe, Schiller, Luther. While these figures were left out of the loud spectacle of the armed Empire, the landmarks connected to them still stood to please the eye, and he could share stories about them with dear old clueless Rebner, who would be eager to hear about his beloved Germany that no longer existed. After that, Heidelberg; the trip down the Rhine to the spires of Cologne; and then Aix at the western border, where that great ruler rested in a haunting majesty, wrapped in the mystical grandeur of the Dark Ages. It was the most fitting and impressive spot on the frontier to say goodbye to Germania.
In gratitude for his recovery Gard made handsome presents to everyone at Loschwitz, accompanied by the conventional Edelweiss. Villa Elsa, in turn, was profuse in its expres[296]sions and little acts of good will. Herr Bucher gave him a queer pipe, and the boys furnished the smoking tobacco. These gifts were to while away the lost hours on the tour. From Frau came a flask of cognac for use in case he were dizzy on the trains. Fräulein bestowed on him one of her tiny etchings showing the Elbe with the Schiller Garden where all had spent so many evenings.
In gratitude for his recovery, Gard gave nice gifts to everyone in Loschwitz, along with the traditional Edelweiss. Villa Elsa, in return, was very generous in showing appreciation and doing little kind things. Herr Bucher presented him with a quirky pipe, and the boys provided the tobacco for smoking. These gifts were meant to help pass the time during the trip. From Frau, he received a flask of cognac in case he felt dizzy on the trains. Fräulein gifted him one of her small etchings depicting the Elbe with the Schiller Garden, where they had all spent so many evenings.
Gard's route, his through ticket to the sea, his traveling clothing, were subjects of daily conversation at the table. Although the family were entirely obliging, Rudi, odd to say, occupied himself the most about the trip. He seemed wonderfully keyed up and more full of military talk even than usual. He insisted on seeing about time-tables, hotels to be recommended, the favorite dishes and brews to be called for at each stopping place for local tone.
Gard's route, his ticket to the sea, and what he should wear on the trip were daily topics at the dinner table. Even though the family was very accommodating, Rudi, strangely enough, was the most invested in the journey. He seemed incredibly excited and talked about military stuff even more than usual. He was determined to check out schedules, suggested hotels, and the local dishes and drinks to order at each stop for the full experience.
Kirtley was pleased over his friendly attentions. He wished to leave with good feelings all around.
Kirtley felt happy about his friendly gestures. He wanted to leave everyone feeling good.
When Rudi helped him get his trunk from the store room, Gard's forgotten passport fell out and excited the other's curiosity.
When Rudi helped him grab his trunk from the storage room, Gard's forgotten passport fell out and sparked the other's curiosity.
"I've never seen an American state paper[297] before," he remarked, puffing a cigarette. "What a droll looking affair! So different from ours. Would you mind if I just glanced at it?"
"I've never seen an American state paper[297] before," he said, puffing on a cigarette. "What a funny-looking thing! It's so different from ours. Would you mind if I just took a quick look at it?"
"Certainly not." Anderson's suspicions of the young German glanced through Kirtley's mind. But Rudi was a thick-headed boy, and what could he or anyone accomplish with a passport? Gard had scarcely been called upon to use it. It had been treated almost as a blank formality, an empty courtesy.
"Definitely not." Anderson's doubts about the young German flashed through Kirtley's mind. But Rudi was a thick-headed kid, and what could he or anyone do with a passport? Gard had barely needed to use it. It had been seen as almost a meaningless formality, just a pointless gesture.
"You don't have to show it in German towns—only at the frontier? Am I right?" inquired Rudi after he had minutely read it through as if he had been an official.
"You only need to show it at the border, not in German towns, right?" Rudi asked after reading it closely as if he were an official.
"Only at the frontier." Gard grew wary. This knowing and recent familiarity was not becoming entirely agreeable. It would be prudent to mystify the son.
"Only at the frontier." Gard became cautious. This awareness and recent familiarity were becoming less comfortable. It would be wise to keep the son in the dark.
"But of course something might happen in a German town and I might need it. So it's always convenient to have about."
"But of course something could happen in a German town and I might need it. So it's always handy to keep it around."
"Where are you going to carry it, then?" pursued the other, handing back the ribboned paper.
"Where are you going to take it, then?" the other asked, handing back the ribboned paper.
"Would you think my grip would be the place?"
"Do you think my grip would be the right place?"
[298]"Your grip? Yes, that's just like me. I always shove everything into my grip at last. See here, now. I have none of my papers about me. All in my grip—even in the house." Rudi opened to view his inside coat pocket in testimony, as if he were an important individual. Gard shifted ground again.
[298] "Your grip? Yeah, that’s just like me. I always end up stuffing everything into my grip. Look at this—I don't have any of my papers with me. They're all in my grip—even back at the house." Rudi opened his inside coat pocket to show off, acting like he was an important person. Gard changed position again.
"I don't know. I may carry it in my pocket—with my ticket. What if I leave it in my trunk after all? I shall have to open up at the border anyhow."
"I don't know. I might keep it in my pocket—with my ticket. What if I leave it in my trunk after all? I'll have to show it at the border anyway."
The subject of the passport kept in Rudi's mind. Three days later he called out to Gard:
The topic of the passport stayed on Rudi's mind. Three days later, he called out to Gard:
"I have been thinking it over and I believe you should carry your passport in your grip. It may slip out of your pocket while you are dozing in the train."
"I've been thinking about it, and I believe you should keep your passport in your bag. It might fall out of your pocket while you're asleep on the train."
"Danke schoen!" said Gard.
"Thank you!" said Gard.
The parents also took great interest in the matter. The paper ought to be examined by the German authorities. Was it not Herr Kirtley's credentials to the German nation? Nothing would answer but that Herr Bucher and Rudolph should take it in town and see that the proper officials were duly cognizant. It was another evidence to Gard that a Teuton is not content until his Government is given[299] an opportunity to approve. The document seemed so vital to Villa Elsa that Gard mentioned it to Anderson in the way of gossip.
The parents were also really invested in the situation. The document needed to be reviewed by the German authorities. Wasn't it Herr Kirtley's credentials to the German nation? The only thing to do was for Herr Bucher and Rudolph to take it into town and make sure the right officials were informed. It was just another sign to Gard that a German isn’t satisfied until their Government is given[299] a chance to approve. The document seemed so important to Villa Elsa that Gard brought it up to Anderson as gossip.
"Don't leave it in your trunk or grip," cautioned the elder. "Keep it on your person. Sew it on your shirt, by golly. One never needs a passport, you know, and then you need it like the devil. I've heard of two or three persons this month who got separated from their passports and were in trouble. Something seems to be really going on under the surface. But spring is the classic time for war as well as love to break out."
"Don't leave it in your trunk or your bag," warned the elder. "Keep it on you. Sew it onto your shirt, seriously. You never need a passport, but when you do, it’s crucial. I've heard of a few people this month who lost their passports and got into trouble. It feels like something is definitely brewing beneath the surface. But spring is the classic time for both war and love to start."
Gard decided to follow Anderson's advice and keep the parchment in his innermost pocket. He also checked his trunk through to the frontier, contrary to Rudi's suggestion. He said nothing of these changes, yet he was far from thinking that the hand of the Goth would dare to reach out after him—a friendly foreigner and guest leaving this peaceful hearthstone, so effusive in its amicable leave-takings.
Gard decided to take Anderson's advice and keep the parchment in his innermost pocket. He also checked his trunk all the way to the frontier, despite Rudi's suggestion. He said nothing about these changes, but he was far from believing that the hand of the Goth would dare to reach out to him—a friendly foreigner and guest leaving this peaceful home, so warm in its goodbyes.
Just before his departure he felt something of a restraint in the household. He attributed it to the social stiffness of the German. This increases when intercourse comes to a point.[300] Affecting moments jolt hard in him—moments when embarrassment is natural to all humans.
Just before he left, he sensed a sort of tension in the household. He thought it was due to the social awkwardness of the Germans. This tension escalates when interactions reach a critical point.[300] Those uncomfortable moments hit him hard—moments when everyone feels a bit embarrassed.
At the gate, for the last time, the Herr was energetically smoking his long pipe. The Frau frequently wiped her sweating face with a handkerchief. The boys kept kicking away the dogs whose barking half drowned the parting words. Gard said good-by, too, to the old linden by his window. How one can miss a tree!
At the gate, for the last time, the man was enthusiastically smoking his long pipe. The woman kept wiping her sweating face with a handkerchief. The boys continued to kick away the dogs whose barking nearly drowned out the farewell words. Gard also said goodbye to the old linden tree by his window. It's amazing how much you can miss a tree!
And Elsa! He flattered himself she looked a mite regretful that he was going. She was starting for her class when she joined the topsy-turvy group by the gate and waved her creamy hand. Her small straw hat, wreathed fatiguingly in roses, clung desperately to her head in the awkward way German women have of wearing headgear, and made her, despite her blossom-like attractiveness, seem quaint and so truly German like the rest. She looked to Gard as pink and blonde as the year before when he had first been dazzled by her glistening hair.
And Elsa! He thought she looked a little regretful that he was leaving. She was on her way to class when she joined the chaotic group by the gate and waved her creamy hand. Her small straw hat, annoyingly adorned with roses, clung tightly to her head in the awkward way German women tend to wear hats, and made her, despite her flower-like beauty, seem quirky and just as German as the others. To Gard, she looked as pink and blonde as she did the year before when he had first been captivated by her shining hair.
On crossing the river he could see her moving down their meadow path where Heine had sung to him, her etching materials under her[301] arm. One last look at the row of knightly castles rimming the heights above her and at the storied Elbe at her feet as she hurried along! He gulped down a small something in his throat, and turned his face toward the station.
On crossing the river, he could see her walking down their meadow path where Heine had sung to him, her sketching materials under her[301] arm. One last glance at the line of knightly castles lining the heights above her and at the famous Elbe at her feet as she hurried along! He swallowed a lump in his throat and turned his face toward the station.
After all, Dresden had been a year of his life.
After all, Dresden had been a year of his life.
CHAPTER XXXVIII
A Journey
AT Eisenach, bound for Frankfort, the train guard punched Kirtley's ticket and showed him into a compartment that was empty save for a military figure engaged in reading a large newspaper, holding it firmly with gloved hands before his face. Although the day was warm, an army cap was clapped down low on the head.
AT Eisenach, headed to Frankfurt, the train conductor punched Kirtley's ticket and directed him to a compartment that was empty except for a soldier reading a large newspaper, gripping it firmly with gloved hands in front of his face. Even though it was a warm day, he had an army cap pulled down low over his head.
Gard sank back on the cushions and closed his eyes. He was somewhat fatigued from having climbed the Wartburg whose castle, famed in the history of Luther, lay asleep there like a long and oddly shaped beetle. He soon fell into a doze. When he became conscious again, his companion's countenance was buried as before in the paper. Underneath it, gray trousers and large boots protruded in Kirtley's direction as if to ward off any familiar approach.
Gard sank back into the cushions and closed his eyes. He was a bit tired from climbing the Wartburg, whose castle, famous in Luther's history, lay there like a long and strangely shaped beetle. He quickly drifted off to sleep. When he became aware again, his companion's face was hidden once more in the paper. Beneath it, gray pants and big boots stuck out towards Kirtley, as if to keep any familiar approach at bay.
[303]That editorial page must be extensive and absorbing, Kirtley commented to himself as he whiffed the refreshing breeze that came in his window from Hesse close by on the west. In a delicious half-dreaminess he thought the stranger turned the journal and that a reddish, be-whiskered visage, with a flat, wide-lobed nose, popped into view for a second.
[303]Kirtley mused to himself that the editorial page had to be detailed and engaging as he enjoyed the fresh breeze coming through his window from nearby Hesse in the west. In a blissful daze, he imagined the stranger flipping through the journal, revealing a reddish, whiskered face with a broad, flat nose for just a moment.
The motionless reading, nevertheless, continued for the remainder of the trip. To the sweet July zephyr and the snug landscapes flitting by, the soldier paid no heed. How German this was!—Kirtley mused. The Teutons are a wintry race and often take their summer joys in a hard, hyperborean fashion. He could not but admire this example of physical constraint. The iron rigors of Prussian drill had made the best army in the world.
The still reading, however, went on for the rest of the trip. The soldier didn’t pay any attention to the pleasant July breeze and the cozy landscapes passing by. How typically German!—Kirtley thought. The Germans are a cold people and often enjoy their summer pleasures in a tough, northern way. He couldn't help but admire this display of physical discipline. The strict training of the Prussian army had created the best military force in the world.
Or perhaps this was some queer, abnormal chap. Gard remembered fragments of stories he had heard of comic or tragic happenings in the separated, locked compartments of continental trains. But the tales were too vague in his mind to pique any anxiety. He roused himself and took up his German newspaper. Muffled war scares. Always war scares more or less in evidence. How dull the Teuton[304] journals would be without them! Dog days were coming and brains were no doubt effervescing.
Or maybe this was just some strange, unusual guy. Gard recalled bits of stories he had heard about funny or tragic events that took place in the separate, locked compartments of European trains. But those stories were too unclear in his mind to make him worry. He shook himself awake and picked up his German newspaper. There were more war scares, as usual. Always some kind of war scare being reported. How boring the German[304] papers would be without them! The hot days of summer were approaching, and people were likely losing their minds.
The forty-eight hours in the rich old capital on the Main were full and Kirtley had almost forgotten his peculiar fellow traveler from Eisenach. What was his amazement, after his guard had punched his transportation and closed him into his compartment in the train for Heidelberg, to find the same individual seated alone again in the corner, engrossed in his voluminous and stationary paper!
The two days in the bustling old capital on the Main were busy, and Kirtley had nearly forgotten about his strange travel companion from Eisenach. He was shocked, after his ticket was validated and he was settled into his train compartment for Heidelberg, to see the same person sitting alone in the corner, totally absorbed in his thick, still newspaper!
This began to be disturbing. Gard was not more brave than the average mortal, but fear had not really been born into his bones. Was this some weird affair? Was it a spy at work, combining German earnestness with German farcicalness? The ludicrous extremes of Jim Deming's experience flashed over Kirtley's mind. But he felt as full confidence in his innocence as had Jim, and he had not given a Cinderella party.
This was starting to get unsettling. Gard wasn't braver than the average person, but fear really hadn’t taken hold in him. Was this some strange situation? Was there a spy involved, mixing German seriousness with German ridiculousness? The ridiculous extremes of Jim Deming's experience crossed Kirtley's mind. But he felt just as confident in his innocence as Jim did, and he hadn’t thrown a Cinderella party.
It was a short run to the celebrated university town on the Neckar through ancient Hesse. What would Gard do? This was a nonsensical situation. He decided to crack it open, find out what it was all about. He[305] summoned his best German and formally addressed a casual remark to the stranger. No answer. He did not hear.
It was a quick trip to the famous university town on the Neckar through historic Hesse. What was Gard going to do? This was a ridiculous situation. He decided to dig in, figure out what was going on. He[305] summoned his best German and casually made a remark to the stranger. No response. He didn’t hear anything.
"Oh, deaf! Probably dumb too!" Gard exclaimed to himself. His next move was to step across to the other window for the evident purpose of throwing out something. A lurch of the train caused him to stumble against the high boots. They remained motionless. He discovered that the eyes behind the paper were fixed in a stare.
"Oh, deaf! Probably dumb too!" Gard muttered to himself. His next move was to cross over to the other window, seemingly to throw something out. A sudden shift of the train made him stumble against the tall boots. They stayed still. He noticed that the eyes behind the paper were locked in a gaze.
It was a stuffed figure!
It was a plush toy!
A mere puppet. And yet a thrill of alarm, for the first time, shot through Gard. It was not reassuring. He thought of Rudi. Was this some official prank young Bucher had set going? It would be like him. He must be a spy, as Anderson had insisted. Was the son trying to act with confederates far away over here near the Rhine?
A simple puppet. And yet, for the first time, a jolt of panic ran through Gard. It was unsettling. He thought of Rudi. Was this some prank that young Bucher had orchestrated? It would be just like him. He must be a spy, just like Anderson had claimed. Was the son trying to coordinate with accomplices from far away near the Rhine?
The passport! Rudi and the family knew all about it. Kirtley felt in his inside shirt pocket. He was relieved to find the parchment still there. How foolish he would have been to leave it in his grip, as Rudi had urged! A traveler couldn't be with his grip every[306] moment. But why was such a paper considered valuable by the Secret Service?
The passport! Rudi and the family were well aware of it. Kirtley reached into his inside shirt pocket and was relieved to find the parchment still there. How foolish he would have been to leave it in his bag, as Rudi had suggested! A traveler couldn't be with their bag every[306] moment. But why was such a document considered valuable by the Secret Service?
As he returned to his seat, Kirtley gave the legs a kick "just for luck." He could not help laughing. The burlesque! The Germans were certainly a curious people. This was like some fantastic tale of Hoffmann with its marionettes and other childish stuff so dear to the race.
As he went back to his seat, Kirtley kicked the legs "just for luck." He couldn't help but laugh. The absurdity! The Germans were definitely an interesting bunch. This felt like some wild story by Hoffmann with its puppets and other silly things that the culture loves.
It came over him that this image was thus being conveniently transported from one town to another for some show—some Jarley waxworks. But how, then, about that other form in the train from Eisenach? It had certainly been alive. Had he not seen it turn its paper? Yet, was he sure? He had been half asleep and might have imagined it.
It occurred to him that this image was being easily moved from one town to another for some event—some Jarley waxworks. But what about that other figure on the train from Eisenach? It had definitely been alive. Hadn't he seen it turn its paper? But was he sure? He had been half asleep and could have imagined it.
As he revolved the matter in his mind, he was less and less positive. At any rate, how explain the fact that this exact figure had been on the two trains and that each time he had been with it alone? How was it known here what trains he would take? Only the Buchers were advised.
As he thought about it more, he felt less and less sure. In any case, how could he explain the fact that this same person had been on both trains and that he had been alone with them each time? How did they know which trains he would take? Only the Buchers were informed.
Whether a silly hoax or a performance of the tremendous sleuth system of Germany, Gard was too unsettled to enjoy fully his brief[307] sojourn at Heidelberg. He decided to trip up any pursuers. Instead of resuming by rail his journey to Mannheim, according to that section of his ticket, he took an auto. For every reason that would be pleasanter. He could see to better advantage the far-famed, vine-clad valley of the Neckar where it merges into the wide and noble plains of the Rhine.
Whether it was a silly prank or an impressive act of the incredible detective system in Germany, Gard was too on edge to fully appreciate his brief[307] stay in Heidelberg. He decided to throw off any pursuers. Instead of continuing by train to Mannheim, as his ticket indicated, he took a car. For all the reasons that made more sense. He could enjoy the renowned, vine-covered valley of the Neckar as it flows into the expansive and beautiful plains of the Rhine.
From Mannheim he went by boat as proposed. His be-whiskered friend did not put in an appearance and Kirtley congratulated himself on the riddance. The more he reflected, the less he made any sense out of it. Coincidence, practical joke, spy system at white heat, hallucination—all suggestions seemed equally untenable.
From Mannheim, he took a boat as suggested. His bearded friend didn’t show up, and Kirtley felt relieved to be rid of him. The more he thought about it, the less it made sense. Coincidence, practical joke, an intense spy operation, hallucination—every possibility seemed equally unlikely.
At Cologne he found the newspapers full of discussions about war. On the trip he had not read much. He was either sight-seeing, traveling, weary or sleepy. For that matter, the public generally was not aware that fearful hostilities were imminent, and he gave the subject no keen notice.
At Cologne, he found the newspapers filled with debates about the war. During the trip, he hadn't read much. He was either sightseeing, traveling, tired, or sleepy. In fact, the general public wasn't aware that serious hostilities were about to erupt, and he didn't pay much attention to the topic.
There is not much to view in the city of odors—Coleridge's city of "two and seventy" smells. Only the cathedral. Although the[308] museum is mediocre Gard dropped in there at noon to fill in his time. After wandering about he became aware that there was, in the distance, another visitor whose occasional shuffling footsteps first attracted his attention among the eye-obstructing objects. Then he saw, at times, a bulky form bending over some curiosity and contemplating it.
There’s not much to see in the city of smells—Coleridge’s city of “two and seventy” scents. Just the cathedral. Although the [308] museum is average, Gard stopped by at noon to pass the time. After wandering around, he noticed, in the distance, another visitor whose occasional shuffling footsteps caught his attention among the obstructing objects. Then he occasionally saw a large figure bending over some curiosity and reflecting on it.
As Kirtley had no companion on his journey, except the military scarecrow, he felt a touch of lonesomeness and was glad when he gradually approached near enough to see that this person was a kindly looking German who had the wondering air of a sight-seer. In their leisurely itineraries they at last met in front of a small bronze copy of a Roman horse marked with italics in Gard's guide book.
As Kirtley had no one with him on his journey except for the military scarecrow, he felt a bit lonely and was relieved when he got close enough to see that this person was a friendly-looking German who seemed to be a curious sightseer. During their relaxed travels, they eventually met in front of a small bronze replica of a Roman horse highlighted in Gard's guidebook.
The other looked, too, as if he wanted to speak, and his cheerful countenance invited Kirtley's readiness to visit with someone. The stranger was in appearance a prosperous man of about thirty-five, blond, with a very small curling mustache under a small nose. Though he kept smiling he still said nothing, as if doubtful of a first advance.
The other man also looked like he wanted to say something, and his friendly expression encouraged Kirtley to strike up a conversation. The stranger seemed like a successful guy in his mid-thirties, blond, with a tiny curled mustache beneath a small nose. Even though he kept smiling, he didn’t say anything, as if he was unsure about making the first move.
Gard hesitated, then broke the ice.
Gard paused for a moment, then took the first step to start the conversation.
"I don't know anything about Roman[309] horses," he essayed. "I can't tell whether this is a good thing or not." The other was affably relieved and was soon pouring out information about the animal.
"I don't know anything about Roman[309] horses," he said. "I can't tell if this is a good thing or not." The other person was friendly and relieved, and soon started sharing information about the animal.
"Excuse me," he ventured, "but I raise horses on my estate and I know a little about them. The Roman horse was, of course, smaller, shorter, stockier, than our modern type. Small heads, short necks, built closer to the ground. Just like the Roman himself. This is a splendid example."
"Excuse me," he said, "but I raise horses on my property and I know a bit about them. The Roman horse was, of course, smaller, shorter, and stockier than our modern breed. They had small heads, short necks, and were built closer to the ground. Just like the Roman himself. This is a great example."
Seeing that Gard followed him he began again with:
Seeing that Gard was following him, he started again with:
"Excuse me." And he plunged into a minute, quite exhaustive, discussion of the Latin specimen before them, as they walked round and round to view it from all angles. Kirtley had never before realized there were so many points—fine points—about this familiar quadruped. The German showed why this animal could not speed, could not make nearly as many miles a day as his present successor. But, like the Roman, he had endurance and he was undoubtedly easier to handle. There were the withers, the haunch, the hock, and a score of other features upon which Gard's new acquaintance held forth, introducing[310] almost every remark with his rather embarrassed "excuse me."
"Excuse me." And he dove into a detailed, thorough discussion of the Latin specimen in front of them, as they circled around to view it from every angle. Kirtley had never realized there were so many nuances—subtle details—about this familiar quadruped. The German explained why this animal couldn't run fast, couldn't cover nearly as much distance in a day as its modern counterpart. But, like the Roman, it had stamina and was definitely easier to manage. He pointed out the withers, the haunch, the hock, and many other features as Gard's new acquaintance elaborated, starting almost every comment with his somewhat awkward "excuse me."
The astonishing Teuton erudition again! Gard had to marvel at it once more. This German was, by rare exception, ingratiating. They finally introduced themselves. Herr Furstenheimer of Wuerttemberg—a farmer. Gard concluded he did not dislike Germans of the south. Their temperaments, voices, manners, are somewhat softer than those of the north.
The amazing knowledge of the Germans again! Gard had to admire it once more. This German was, unusually, quite friendly. They finally introduced themselves. Herr Furstenheimer from Wuerttemberg—a farmer. Gard realized he didn't mind Germans from the south. Their temperaments, voices, and manners are a bit softer than those from the north.
"I haven't been in Cologne in twenty years," Furstenheimer explained. "Just stopped off. I wonder if you—I see you too are a tourist—happen to be going my way. Excuse me, but that would be odd, wouldn't it?"
"I haven't been to Cologne in twenty years," Furstenheimer said. "I just stopped by. I wonder if you—I see you’re a tourist too—might be headed in the same direction. Excuse me, but that would be unusual, right?"
"Yes—I'm bound for Rotterdam."
"Yes—I'm headed to Rotterdam."
"Rotterdam—- why so am I!" ejaculated the German in a happy moment. "I'm on my way to visit my sister there. I haven't seen her for years. It's really shameful. What train do you take?"
"Rotterdam—why, me too!" exclaimed the German joyfully. "I'm heading there to visit my sister. I haven't seen her in years. It's honestly embarrassing. Which train are you taking?"
"The two o'clock. I wish you might be going along. One gets somewhat bored traveling alone."
"The two o'clock. I wish you could come with me. It gets a bit boring traveling alone."
"I'm the same way. I like company. I[311] had intended going on to-night, but this Cologne one hears so much about is disappointingly dull, isn't it? Nothing to see." They conversed in German to Kirtley's linguistic satisfaction.
"I'm the same. I enjoy being around people. I[311] had planned to go out tonight, but this Cologne everyone talks about is surprisingly boring, right? There's nothing to see." They chatted in German, which pleased Kirtley.
"But I'm stopping off at Aix-la-Chapelle," he had to say. "That's at four. Then I'm taking the late train."
"But I'm stopping in Aix-la-Chapelle," he said. "That’s at four. Then I'm taking the late train."
"What is there at Aix? I don't remember."
"What’s in Aix? I can’t recall."
"I want to see Charlemagne's tomb."
"I want to see Charlemagne's tomb."
"Oh, so? That can't be duller than Cologne, can it? I don't see that I would be losing any time by it either. I'll tell you what I'll do. If I decide to join you—and I hope I shall—you'll see me at the two o'clock. But if I don't—well, Aufwiedersehen!—let us hope—and I am delighted to have met you."
"Oh, really? That can't be any more boring than Cologne, can it? I don't think I'd be wasting my time if I did. Here’s what I'll do. If I decide to join you—and I hope I do—you'll see me at two o'clock. But if I don't—well, goodbye!—let's hope for the best—and it was great meeting you."
Gard was gratified when the sociable Wuerttemberger arrived at the station. They went on to Aix in a compartment full of militaires. The countryside, swimming in the sunlight, lay tidy and dimpling in the gentle arms of a peace and prosperity that made the newspaper talk of a campaign seem unreal and preposterous.
Gard was pleased when the friendly Wuerttemberger showed up at the station. They headed to Aix in a compartment filled with soldiers. The countryside, basking in the sunlight, looked neat and inviting in the gentle embrace of a peace and prosperity that made the newspaper chatter about a campaign feel unrealistic and absurd.
[312]Furstenheimer appeared to have only the interests of a small land-holder, and gossiped about his farm, his horses and prices. He was not apparently concerned about the war excitement. Agriculture in Wuerttemberg was more important. Like most Germans, whether there was war or no war, seemed much the same thing with him. Either must be taken naturally and philosophically like a state of Nature. Furstenheimer was not fond of being away from home. To be frank, his brother-in-law in Rotterdam had got into financial straits and his own sister was ill. They had become almost strangers in the long separation. And that was not right, was it? He really had had to go.
[312]Furstenheimer seemed to care only about the interests of a small landowner, chatting about his farm, his horses, and prices. He didn’t seem to be worried about the war excitement. Agriculture in Wuerttemberg was more important. Like most Germans, it didn’t make much difference to him whether there was war or not. Both had to be approached naturally and philosophically, as part of the human experience. Furstenheimer didn’t enjoy being away from home. To be honest, his brother-in-law in Rotterdam had run into financial trouble, and his sister was unwell. They had become almost like strangers after such a long time apart. And that wasn’t right, was it? He really had to go.
When they arrived at Aix—the German Aachen—they decided to leave their grips in an inn, across the station Platz, so that they could conveniently dine there and be near at hand for the express. Then they started for the cathedral which, with its eleven centuries, loomed under a lofty octagon from a low hill.
When they got to Aix—the German Aachen—they chose to leave their bags at an inn across from the station square, so they could easily grab a meal there and be close for the express. Then they headed to the cathedral, which, with its eleven centuries of history, stood tall beneath a grand octagon on a low hill.
CHAPTER XXXIX
The resting place of Charlemagne
IN a few minutes the two travelers reached the side portal of the hoary temple. It represented the seat of Charlemagne's political and ecclesiastical power—the capitol of the ancient Franks. The door was closed. A service was being held. It would be out at five o'clock.
IN a few minutes, the two travelers arrived at the side entrance of the ancient temple. This place was the center of Charlemagne's political and religious authority—the capital of the old Franks. The door was shut. A service was in progress. It would end at five o'clock.
To occupy the interim Gard and his new friend went over to the neighboring town hall, located on the site of the emperor's palace. They found it a gay Gothic edifice, the roof flanked by two pert towers. Inside they tiptoed about with silent respect in the immense coronation gallery—one of the largest rooms in the world. Here the medieval German emperors were crowned and imperial diets held.
To pass the time, Gard and his new friend went to the nearby town hall, which was on the site of the emperor's palace. They found it a cheerful Gothic building, with two stylish towers on the roof. Inside, they quietly wandered through the huge coronation gallery—one of the largest rooms in the world. This is where the medieval German emperors were crowned and imperial diets took place.
When the tourists returned to the cathedral they met two young, clean-shaven Germans,[314] obviously travelers like themselves, also wishing to enter. One was tall, the other short. While waiting for the audience to file out, the four struck up a casual conversation about the edifice. Gard, full of his guide book, was pleased to inform them on a subject of which they pleaded ignorance.
When the tourists got back to the cathedral, they ran into two young, clean-shaven Germans,[314] clearly travelers like them, who also wanted to go inside. One was tall, and the other was short. While waiting for the crowd to leave, the four started a casual conversation about the building. Gard, excited to share from his guidebook, was happy to fill them in on a topic they admitted they didn’t know much about.
They sauntered into the somber, august interior. Above were the impressive stained glass windows, high-flung in the octagon. Kirtley's binocular, strung over his shoulders, came in handy to the others. The Germans seemed somewhat posted on stained glass (Teuton erudition!) and with Gard's binocular they went off for an inspection from the exterior.
They strolled into the serious, grand interior. Above them were the stunning stained glass windows, high up in the octagon. Kirtley's binoculars, slung over his shoulders, were useful to the others. The Germans appeared to know a bit about stained glass (typical Teutonic knowledge!) and with Gard's binoculars, they went out to take a look from the outside.
He preferred to remain and contemplate alone the solemn scene about him. It was an hour he had looked forward to. He wanted to recall what he had read of this historic spot and the epic and romantic associations here of the most celebrated of Carolingians.
He preferred to stay and reflect alone on the serious scene around him. This was an hour he had been looking forward to. He wanted to remember what he had read about this historic place and the epic and romantic connections here of the most famous Carolingians.
In the mosaic flooring at his feet, as he sat down, was the tombstone which (in the tradition) lies above the imperial victor who sits below waiting with his scepter in his hand and his white beard ever growing—the king of the[315] Middle Ages. How many, many potentates, great and small, during all the intervening centuries, had bowed their heads and spoken words of reverence in the presence of the only sepulchre remaining in situ and intact of the world-conquerors of antiquity! Of all these reputed soliloquies, that of Don Carlos, in the spacious Alexandrines of Victor Hugo in "Hernani," Gard remembered as being the most famous. He had heard what a long and impressive recital it always is as one of the tests of the dramatic actor at the Théâtre Français.
In the mosaic floor beneath him, as he took a seat, was the tombstone that, according to tradition, rests above the imperial conqueror who waits below, holding his scepter with his ever-growing white beard—the king of the [315] Middle Ages. How many powerful rulers, both great and small, had bowed their heads and spoken words of honor in front of the only remaining intact sepulcher of the ancient world conquerors! Among all these legendary moments, Gard remembered Don Carlos’s monologue in the sweeping Alexandrines of Victor Hugo’s "Hernani" as the most famous. He had heard that it is a long and impressive piece, often used as a benchmark for dramatic actors at the Théâtre Français.
His thoughts ran on. Without Charlemagne's military successes, his widespread reorganizations, the political and civil grandeur of his acts, his picturesque journeys, his union of church and state, what would the Dark Ages have been? In its mountains of fact and luring mists of fable he had stood mighty and solitary, inspiring its imagination, its legends, its superstitions, its songs. He was its compelling figure. He it was who unified medievaldom and laid the bases of what had since governed in western Europe and prevented it from remaining a vast region of large and small tribes fighting among themselves.[316] And he alone, among the powerful military chieftains of the old, old past, had died both peacefully and undefeated.
His thoughts continued. Without Charlemagne's military victories, his extensive reforms, the political and civil importance of his actions, his adventurous travels, and his combination of church and state, what would the Dark Ages have looked like? Amidst mountains of facts and enticing mists of legends, he stood powerful and alone, inspiring its imagination, its myths, its superstitions, and its songs. He was the defining figure of that time. He was the one who unified the medieval world and laid the foundations for what has since governed Western Europe, preventing it from becoming just a vast area of various tribes warring with each other.[316] And he was the only one among the great military leaders of the ancient past who died peacefully and undefeated.
Why, then, has he faded from view? This was an interesting question to Kirtley. Why has Cæsar so outshone Charlemagne? Why are Homer and Vergil, in comparison, coming ever more to the fore? Why has Dante become the masterly profile of medievalism?
Why has he disappeared from sight? This was an intriguing question for Kirtley. Why has Cæsar outshone Charlemagne so much? Why are Homer and Vergil increasingly in the spotlight compared to others? Why has Dante become the defining figure of medievalism?
A significant answer had before occurred to Gard. These four personages could write marvelously well while Charlemagne could scarcely even write his name. Had he been a great author, why would not his fame be burning brightly like theirs? In every institution of education their classic language is kept before both youth and professor. Their cults accordingly grow. While the Frank so largely shaped the Middle Ages and furnished leading motives for its background, the Italian merely pictured it.
A significant realization had already struck Gard. These four individuals could write incredibly well, while Charlemagne could barely sign his own name. If he had been a great author, why wouldn’t his fame be shining as brightly as theirs? In every educational institution, their classical language is presented to both students and teachers. As a result, their influence continues to grow. While the Frank played a major role in shaping the Middle Ages and provided key themes for its backdrop, the Italian merely depicted it.
And yet the latter has become its most distinct luminary. His art has surpassed in renown the medieval sword and crown. His pen is a constant self-advertiser while those emblems of state fall to the ground. Though every spot associated with the lives of Cæsar,[317] of Vergil, of Dante, is sought by student and sage, the tomb of Charlemagne is being forgotten. Who knows that it exists or cares? And is it all because he had no literary skill? A gigantesque character, surrounded by his romantic paladins—Roland, Oliver, Ganelon and the rest—his face turned alike toward west, east and south—to France and Germany and Italy—he nevertheless has long been sinking into the ever-darker shadows of a dulled obscurity....
And yet, he has become its most notable figure. His art has gained more fame than the medieval sword and crown. His writing constantly promotes itself, while those symbols of power fade away. Even though every location connected to the lives of Caesar,[317] Vergil, and Dante is pursued by students and scholars, Charlemagne's tomb is being forgotten. Who knows it exists or even cares? Is it all because he lacked literary talent? A giant of a man, surrounded by his legendary knights—Roland, Oliver, Ganelon, and others—his face turned towards the west, east, and south—to France, Germany, and Italy—he has nonetheless long been fading into the deepening shadows of obscurity...
Gard's friend and the other two Germans presently returned and interrupted his ruminations. They had seen their fill and were anxious to escape from this gray cavern of a dim oblivion. Outdoors the party of four found the sun shining, but rain clouds were hovering in the east. The strangers had plenty of time as they were without a fixed itinerary. They were very agreeable and it was suggested that all dine together. Would not a stroll in the environs be meanwhile a suitable diversion?—out toward the attractive Lousberg and its belvedere?
Gard's friend and the other two Germans soon came back and interrupted his thoughts. They had had enough of this gray cavern of dullness and were eager to get out. Once outside, the group of four found the sun shining, although rain clouds were looming in the east. The strangers had plenty of time since they didn't have a set schedule. They were very friendly, and it was suggested that they all have dinner together. Wouldn't a walk around the area toward the charming Lousberg and its lookout point be a nice distraction in the meantime?
Herr Furstenheimer had indicated an inquiry to Kirtley as to whether he would like to join the other two. Upon his signifying[318] affirmatively, the four walked northward. The flat face of one of the young men Gard fancied he had seen before. It was, however, of a somewhat familiar Teuton variety and lost in the maze of all the German visages he had seen.
Herr Furstenheimer had asked Kirtley if he wanted to join the other two. When he agreed[318], the four of them walked north. Gard thought one of the young men's flat faces looked familiar. It was, however, a somewhat typical German face and got lost in the multitude of all the German faces he had seen.
They idled along, recounting their exciting experiences in traveling. Gard told of the wax image in the train as the singular incident he had to offer. As it did not appear to appeal to the curiosity of his companions, he dropped the subject. The Germans are used to the grotesque and egregious.
They lounged around, sharing their thrilling travel stories. Gard mentioned the wax figure on the train as the only noteworthy thing he had to share. Since it didn't seem to intrigue his friends, he changed the topic. The Germans are accustomed to the bizarre and the outrageous.
At intervals the company changed about by twos, their hats coming off frequently in the warmth of the evening. On reaching the top of a small ascent, a summer inn there invited to cooling drinks. It was a low-storied, straggling construction, with a large green yard and trees. There were no guests as yet for the approaching meal time.
At times, the group switched partners in pairs, their hats coming off often in the warmth of the evening. When they reached the top of a small hill, a summer inn offered refreshing drinks. It was a one-story, sprawling building, with a large green yard and trees. There were no guests yet for the upcoming mealtime.
The cathedral acquaintances took one side of a table under the branches, and the companionable Furstenheimer with Gard faced them. With the beer they began comparing the parts of the world they hailed from. Kirtley belonged to that distant land—America![319] Incredible! He had traveled so far. It was a country the two newcomers wished to visit. They could not credit the surprising things they had heard concerning the United States. All was so odd there.
The cathedral friends took one side of a table under the branches, and the friendly Furstenheimer with Gard faced them. With their beers, they started comparing the places they were from. Kirtley was from that faraway land—America![319] Unbelievable! He had traveled such a long distance. It was a country the two newcomers wanted to visit. They couldn’t believe the surprising things they had heard about the United States. Everything there seemed so strange.
The smaller German, with the broad face, having lost no time in being full of compliments about Kirtley's accent, went on:
The shorter German guy, with the wide face, quickly filled the air with compliments about Kirtley's accent and continued:
"You Americans learn our language better than we do yours. I could never get the th in my school. You seem to do everything so differently in America, too. Now, there's your great game of cards, for instance. I was on a boat once going down the Danube and some of your compatriots were playing it. They called it—ach Gott!—what did they call it? You know."
"You Americans learn our language better than we do yours. I could never get the 'th' sound in my school. You seem to do everything so differently in America too. Now, there's your famous card game, for example. I was on a boat once going down the Danube, and some of your fellow countrymen were playing it. They called it—oh God!—what did they call it? You know."
"Poker," said Gard, amused.
"Poker," Gard said, amused.
"No, that isn't it."
"No, that's not it."
"Bridge."
"Bridge."
"No, the devil, why can't I think of it? They played it—if I had a pack of cards I would show you what I mean. You could name it then."
"No, the devil, why can't I think of it? They played it—if I had a deck of cards I would show you what I mean. You could name it then."
The German called the attendant. The latter did not come. The other hurried into the restaurant and came back waving a deck.
The German called for the attendant. The attendant didn’t come. The other person rushed into the restaurant and returned waving a deck.
[320]"Now I will try to show you. I can't do it well. I have never seen it but once."
[320]"Now I’m going to try to show you. I can’t do it very well. I’ve only seen it once."
"Monte," said Gard. It was not the name the German recognized. Kirtley laughed over this old county fair acquaintance. Three card monte under the walls of Charlemagne's church! This was bringing the ancient and the modern together with a vengeance. Furstenheimer thought the game was droll. He had never seen any played like that.
"Monte," said Gard. It wasn't the name the German recognized. Kirtley laughed at this old county fair connection. Three card monte under the walls of Charlemagne's church! This was smashing together the ancient and the modern in a big way. Furstenheimer thought the game was amusing. He had never seen one played like that.
"How can that be a game!" he exclaimed—"only three cards! You must have left out something. It looks ridiculous. What's the point?"
"How can that be a game!" he exclaimed. "Only three cards! You must have left something out. It looks ridiculous. What's the point?"
"Why, you bet!" cried the dealer who was awkwardly manipulating the cards. The two strangers wagered with each other, and the Wuerttemberger at last got interested and bet first against one, then the other. In a few minutes he had lost two hundred marks to the dealer, and acted as if worried. The dealer won also from his associate, but not so readily.
"Of course!" shouted the dealer, who was awkwardly shuffling the cards. The two strangers were betting against each other, and eventually, the guy from Wuerttemberg got intrigued and placed his bets, first against one, then the other. In just a few minutes, he lost two hundred marks to the dealer and looked a bit stressed. The dealer also won from his partner, but it didn't happen as easily.
"A gambler, and playing clumsily to fool me," Gard had promptly said to himself. He endeavored to save his friend from falling deeper into the toils. He nudged him under the table, but the Teuton stupidly understood[321] nothing. He kept on, more and more distraught, losing money, then groaning about it and wiping his trickling and distressed countenance.
"A gambler, and playing badly to trick me," Gard thought to himself. He tried to help his friend avoid getting in too deep. He nudged him under the table, but the German completely misunderstood[321]. He continued, getting more and more upset, losing money, then complaining about it and wiping his sweaty, troubled face.
When the dealer finally saw that Kirtley would not wager, he grew noisy.
When the dealer finally realized that Kirtley wasn't going to bet, he became loud.
"Not to play your own national game—is it polite, I say?" He flaunted the cards before Gard.
"Is it polite to not play your own national game?" he said, waving the cards in front of Gard.
"I do not bet," Kirtley repeated as pleasantly as he could, and the tall German tried to quiet his mate.
"I don't bet," Kirtley repeated as nicely as he could, and the tall German tried to calm his friend.
The rain, which had been brewing, presently began to come down and was breaking up the sport. They agreed to dine in the inn and go back to town when the downpour was over. Gard's friend squared accounts—four hundred and eighty marks passed across. He looked unhappy enough. But the dealer was still far from satisfied because the American had not played. The German had won from the other two. Could he not win from an American in an American game? He had been eager to wager at one turn all the money he had gained.
The rain, which had been building up, suddenly started pouring down and was ruining the game. They decided to eat at the inn and head back to town once the downpour stopped. Gard's friend settled the accounts—four hundred and eighty marks exchanged hands. He looked pretty unhappy. But the dealer was still not satisfied because the American hadn't played. The German had won against the other two. Couldn't he win against an American in an American game? He had been eager to bet all the money he had won in one go.
"A pair of cheap gamblers," Gard repeated to himself. He wished his foolish friend from[322] Wuerttemberg had kept out of it. They were here on the edge of a strange city, in an unknown inn, at nightfall. It showed that Furstenheimer was a green country man who, as he admitted, had seldom been away from home. He had not even seen his neighboring Rhine in years.
"A couple of cheap gamblers," Gard repeated to himself. He wished his foolish friend from[322] Wuerttemberg had stayed out of it. They were here on the outskirts of a strange city, in an unfamiliar inn, at dusk. It was clear that Furstenheimer was a naïve country boy who, as he confessed, had rarely been away from home. He hadn't even seen the nearby Rhine in years.
The rain was now pelting them and they scurried indoors.
The rain was now pouring down on them, and they hurried inside.
CHAPTER XL
The Conclusion of a Small Game
THE short German had worked himself up into an irritable state. He led the way about the arrangements for dining, his tall friend all the while mildly attempting to soothe his ruffled feelings. Furstenheimer, appearing much crest-fallen, meekly followed their wishes.
THE short German had worked himself into a grumpy mood. He took charge of organizing the dinner, while his tall friend quietly tried to calm him down. Furstenheimer, looking quite dejected, passively went along with what they wanted.
A private room must be had, the dealer announced. They took a detached one with the door opening out toward the highway. Each one of the three proposed to have a favorite dish from his province.
A private room is required, the dealer announced. They selected a separate one with the door facing the highway. Each of the three wanted to order a favorite dish from their province.
The little German grew more fussy. He condemned the restaurant manager and got at loggerheads with the waiter. He must at least have a Mecklenburg salad as he came from Mecklenburg-Schwerin. The waiter did not know what it was and the irascible Teuton informed him bluntly that he was a Dummkopf[324]. The card player would make it himself and all must do him the honor of eating it. He proclaimed in a loud voice that it was the superior of all salads. He had won at cards, the money stuck out of his pockets. He was triumphant and becoming insolent.
The little German got more irritable. He criticized the restaurant manager and argued with the waiter. He demanded to have a Mecklenburg salad since he was from Mecklenburg-Schwerin. The waiter didn’t know what that was, and the angry German bluntly told him he was a Dummkopf[324]. The card player said he would make it himself and everyone had to honor him by eating it. He declared loudly that it was the best of all salads. He had won at cards, with money sticking out of his pockets. He was feeling triumphant and getting cocky.
Kirtley wished he were out of this company. He opened the outside door a moment for fresh air. He noticed that the door had a spring lock. The rain was coming down in torrents. And he ought not to abandon his naïve friend.
Kirtley wished he were away from this group. He opened the outside door for a moment to get some fresh air. He noticed that the door had a spring lock. The rain was pouring down heavily. And he shouldn’t leave his innocent friend behind.
The repast was begun by drinking the prevailing toast to Der Tag! His companions now talked openly about the threatening war, and Gard, who had not seen a paper since morning, did not know that hostilities were at last in the way of breaking out. From the conversation he could but judge that all Belgium and northern France were to be made German. This seemed simple and inevitable through all the blustering and bragging. England—America—did not appear to cut any figure. They had no armies, hence they were negligible.
The meal started with a toast to Der Tag! His friends now openly discussed the looming war, and Gard, who hadn’t seen a newspaper since morning, was unaware that conflict was finally on the verge of starting. From their conversation, he gathered that all of Belgium and northern France were to become part of Germany. This seemed straightforward and unavoidable amidst all the boasting and bluster. England and America didn’t seem to matter—they had no armies, so they were insignificant.
When the company got down to the Mecklenburg salad, the clamorous German expa[325]tiated about it at length as he began his bustling preparations for its manufacture.
When the company started on the Mecklenburg salad, the loud German expatriate talked about it at length as he began his busy preparations for making it.
"One of the great points of my salad is plenty of pepper." With a flourish he grabbed the little pepper box to suit the action to the words, and nothing came out. It was empty.
"One of the best parts of my salad is a lot of pepper." With a dramatic gesture, he grabbed the tiny pepper shaker to match his words, but nothing came out. It was empty.
"Waiter, waiter, bring some pepper, you stupid Kerl. Don't you know enough to set the table properly?"
"Waiter, waiter, bring some pepper, you stupid guy. Don't you know how to set the table properly?"
Another pepper receptacle was brought, but it would not work. It was stopped up.
Another pepper shaker was brought, but it wouldn't work. It was clogged.
"Gott im Himmel! waiter, you idiot, bring some pepper and be quick about it." And the swaggerer began abusing him, the inn and inferentially men who would not wager in a social little card game. The servitor raced in, mad and muttering, and banged down a big can of the much desired condiment. At last, Gott sei Dank! there was pepper by the wholesale. The salad proceeded on its troubled course.
"Gosh! Waiter, you fool, bring some pepper and hurry up!" The obnoxious fellow started berating him, the inn, and pretty much anyone who wouldn’t bet in a casual card game. The waiter rushed in, furious and mumbling, and slammed down a big can of the much-needed condiment. Finally, thank goodness! There was pepper in abundance. The salad continued on its bumpy journey.
"You like our Germany—yes?" was inserted. Kirtley assured the three that he had had a pleasant year.
"You like our Germany—right?" was added. Kirtley assured the three that he had a great year.
"Our Germany is a great country," explained the tall Teuton in a high, cracked voice. "And after the war it will be a much[326] greater country." He was flushed with drink like the other two. The Germans lifted their glasses again to Der Tag, and Gard, their guest, joined in half-heartedly. There was this time an ugly firmness showing in the demonstration that he did not fancy. He was frankly uncomfortable. His companions did not like it because he drank sparingly in spite of all the vehement urging.
"Our Germany is a great country," the tall German explained in a high, cracked voice. "And after the war, it will be an even greater country." He was flushed with alcohol like the other two. The Germans raised their glasses again to Der Tag, and Gard, their guest, joined in half-heartedly. This time, there was an ugly firmness in the toast that made him uneasy. He felt openly uncomfortable. His companions were not pleased because he drank sparingly despite all the intense encouragement.
The salad proved to be a wonderful dish, hot and strong, fit for the iron stomach of a "blond beast." It not only bit but was provocative. In the growing conviviality the subject leaped from salad to cards. The winner took out his money. He began shaking it in Gard's eyes, insisting once more on wagering it that his American friend could not pick the card. With the demi-tasses and cigars he ordered the deck and table. He started the game, having locked out the blockhead of a waiter and dropped the key into his own pocket.
The salad turned out to be a fantastic dish, hot and bold, perfect for the tough stomach of a "blond beast." It didn't just have a kick; it was also stimulating. As the atmosphere became more lively, the conversation shifted from the salad to playing cards. The winner pulled out his cash, waving it in Gard's face and insisting again that his American friend couldn’t guess the card. With the demi-tasses and cigars, he called for the deck and table. He kicked off the game after shutting out the clueless waiter and pocketing the key.
Gard would not play. His ire was rising. The small German declared himself mistreated. He jumped up from the table and burst out in a tirade against shoddy Americans. This brought each man to his feet. The[327] dealer, violent and familiar, put his hands on Gard.
Gard refused to play. He was getting angrier. The little German declared he was being mistreated. He jumped up from the table and launched into a rant about lousy Americans. This got everyone on their feet. The [327] dealer, aggressive and well-known, placed his hands on Gard.
"You are a dollar American and dare not bet."
"You are an American dollar and don't dare to place a bet."
"Please keep your hands off me," cried Kirtley and drew back, shaking with the affront. The German persisted and Gard's football days stood him in good stead. He knocked him down. At this the mask was thrown off.
"Please keep your hands off me," shouted Kirtley, pulling back and trembling with anger. The German wouldn’t back down, and Gard's football days helped him out. He knocked him to the ground. At that moment, the mask was removed.
"Get his passport!" yelled the dealer on the floor. The other two began to draw weapons and started toward Kirtley. He was almost unnerved. His genial Wuerttemberg friend a spy! It was the Secret Service.
"Get his passport!" shouted the dealer on the floor. The other two began to pull out their weapons and moved toward Kirtley. He was nearly rattled. His friendly Wuerttemberg buddy was a spy! It was the Secret Service.
As he stepped back, thunderstruck, his hand grazed the big pepper can which had been left on the side table. It sent an inspiration whizzing through his brain. He whisked off its unfastened top, grabbed a handful of pepper, and with a swing of the kind he used to use in his throws from left field to home plate—let go with all his force.
As he stepped back, shocked, his hand brushed against the large pepper shaker that had been left on the side table. It sparked an idea in his mind. He removed its loose lid, took a handful of pepper, and with a swing similar to what he used for his throws from left field to home plate—let it fly with all his strength.
The aim was true. The pepper swept into the eyes and mouths of the two men. The other was half lying on the floor near their feet and he also received a dose. Pepper filled[328] their side of the room and blinded them as they sneezed and groped about in pain. Gard bolted for the outer, self-locking door and, almost before he realized it, was out in the highway in the rain, heading away from the city and in the direction of the Dutch border which, he knew, lay not far away.
The aim was accurate. The pepper hit the eyes and mouths of the two men. The other guy was partly lying on the floor near their feet and caught some of it too. Pepper filled[328] their side of the room, making them blind as they sneezed and stumbled around in pain. Gard rushed to the outer, self-locking door and, almost without thinking, was outside in the rain on the highway, moving away from the city toward the Dutch border, which he knew was not far away.
CHAPTER XLI
Are they Huns?
IT was an instinctive move to get out of Deutschland—raucous, hostile Deutschland, lying athwart his soul. But his grip? his overcoat? his umbrella? He faced back toward the town. His mind was in a tumult. No, he must make for the frontier at all hazards. The Germans, whenever they recovered, would naturally expect him to return for his articles and would watch them or have them watched. He felt for his passport, money, trunk check. They were safe. He was sure his trunk would be at the border for him. He turned about and began running. The bellowing condition of the agonized sleuths and the locked door would enable him to get a good start under the cover of the darkness and storm.
IT was an instinctual decision to leave Germany—chaotic, hostile Germany, weighing on his spirit. But what about his grip? his overcoat? his umbrella? He looked back at the town. His thoughts were in turmoil. No, he had to make it to the border no matter what. The Germans, once they regained their composure, would naturally expect him to come back for his belongings and would keep an eye on them or have someone else do it. He checked for his passport, money, trunk ticket. They were secure. He was confident his trunk would be waiting for him at the border. He turned around and started running. The loud chaos of the frantic searchers and the locked door would give him a solid head start in the cover of darkness and the storm.
When almost breathless he stopped running and walked forward rapidly. There was[330] no travel in his direction. But he had to dodge frequent oncoming vehicles with men and materials of some kind. They were being concentrated at Aix—a main distributing point for the invasion of Belgium.
When he finally caught his breath, he stopped running and hurriedly walked forward. There was[330] no traffic in his direction. But he had to dodge numerous vehicles coming towards him, carrying men and supplies of some kind. They were being gathered at Aix—a key distribution hub for the invasion of Belgium.
He was wet through, yet hot as a furnace. The cooling rain was grateful. The loss of his grip and things would be inconvenient, not serious. He began running again. Then he walked as fast as he could. He was more and more convinced that those Germans would count on his going back for his belongings. They would not imagine that a dollar American would leave his possessions and hoof it to the Dutch Limberg on a night like this.
He was completely soaked but felt hot like a furnace. The refreshing rain was a relief. Losing his grip and belongings would be a hassle, but not critical. He started running again, then walked as quickly as he could. He increasingly believed that the Germans expected him to go back for his stuff. They wouldn’t think that an American dollar would just leave his possessions and trek to Dutch Limburg on a night like this.
His brain was on fire. He thought of everything. Furstenheimer had been a trailing sleuth. He had fooled Kirtley completely. It was a masterly piece of work. Gard metaphorically took off his hat to the German Secret Service. Notwithstanding the Jim Deming episode and Anderson's animadversions, this had been a highly expert demonstration of the art.
His mind was racing. He considered everything. Furstenheimer had been a clever investigator. He had completely outsmarted Kirtley. It was an impressive feat. Gard figuratively tipped his hat to the German Secret Service. Despite the Jim Deming incident and Anderson's criticisms, this had been a highly skilled display of the craft.
Gard's mind went over his whole trip from Eisenach, trying to find where his suspicions should have been more aroused. He could[331] discover no loophole where any unflattering dullness on his part was particularly at fault. He had made rather the most advances at Cologne to the self-styled Furstenheimer with his Roman horse.
Gard went through his entire trip from Eisenach, trying to pinpoint where he should have been more suspicious. He couldn’t find any clear mistake on his part that would account for his lack of awareness. He had made quite a few advances in Cologne to the self-proclaimed Furstenheimer with his Roman horse.
How casually, too, the two confederates had been picked up at the cathedral! Their intelligent interest in stained glass! Very clever. All had been wonderfully clever. He now saw that when Furstenheimer left him at Cologne to decide about joining him, and also when the three had gone off to inspect the windows, there had been ample time to perfect their scheme.
How casually, too, the two partners had been picked up at the cathedral! Their keen interest in stained glass! Very smart. Everything had been incredibly clever. He now realized that when Furstenheimer left him in Cologne to think about joining him, and also when the three went off to check out the windows, there had been plenty of time to finalize their plan.
His passport! What on earth could they want of that! In the German way they had used a steam hammer to crack a hickory nut. No one in 1914 had an inkling of what service American passports were to be to the Kaiser's Government. The world was soon to rub its eyes over Germany's treacherous, fiendish, employment of chemicals both on documents and on humans. Lackadaisical mankind did not then dream of the thoroughness and elaboration with which Deutschland was preparing her many deep and diabolical designs.
His passport! What on earth could they want with that? In typical German fashion, they used a steam hammer to crack a hickory nut. No one in 1914 had any idea how useful American passports would become for the Kaiser’s government. Soon, the world would be shocked by Germany’s treacherous and cruel use of chemicals on both documents and people. People at that time couldn't have imagined the extent and complexity with which Germany was preparing its many deep and sinister plans.
[332]Toward dawn Gard, pretty well winded and in a bath of perspiration, trudged along more slowly while his thoughts streamed precipitately ahead under the pressure of the stupefying developments. He now knew who the little German was. He was that rigid, whiskered, military person in the train from Eisenach! The same flat, wide-lobed nose. He had not guessed it before because the face, clear of a beard, had really suggested in Aix (he now realized) that of the typical shaven Teuton waiter. But why had the spy traveled in such a stiff and mysterious fashion? Likely to locate the passport—find out whether it was then being carried in the grip or on Kirtley's person. In some way—probably from the manner in which the grip had been handled—the sleuth had convinced himself it was kept in a pocket.
[332]As dawn approached, Gard, pretty worn out and sweating, trudged along more slowly while his thoughts rushed ahead, overwhelmed by the shocking events. He now realized who the little German was. He was that stern, mustached military guy on the train from Eisenach! The same flat, wide nose. He hadn’t connected it before because, without a beard, the face actually reminded him of a typical clean-shaven German waiter back in Aix (he understood that now). But why had the spy traveled in such a stiff and secretive way? Most likely to identify the passport—figure out if it was being carried in the bag or on Kirtley. Somehow—probably from how the bag was handled—the detective had convinced himself it was kept in a pocket.
Although Gard could not clearly make it out, the puppet must have been an ingenious device to mislead. The ridiculous card dealer, going through all his mock part with such desperate earnestness, could very well have conceived this eccentric project. Would anyone outside Germany have believed in such use of a stuffed figure? The maneuver succeeded in[333] a fashion, for Gard had not been as shrewd as he imagined in taking the auto from Heidelberg. He may have caused a change in tactics, but he had simply fallen into the hands of Furstenheimer in the museum. The leisurely stroll, the game of cards, the badgering over the betting, everything, had been fully worked out. Somehow, through it all, they were to deprive him of his state paper—likely when he had become intoxicated, as was evidently planned.
Although Gard couldn’t make it out clearly, the puppet must have been a clever trick to deceive. The absurd card dealer, playing his part with such desperate sincerity, could definitely have come up with this strange idea. Would anyone outside of Germany have believed in using a stuffed figure like that? The plan worked to some extent, since Gard hadn’t been as clever as he thought by taking the car from Heidelberg. He might have changed their tactics, but he had just fallen into the hands of Furstenheimer at the museum. The casual walk, the card game, the pressure over the betting—everything had been carefully planned. Somehow, through all of it, they aimed to take his state paper from him—most likely when he got drunk, as it was clearly intended.
But the revelation about the Buchers! That was the finishing blow. "Dastards!" Gard hurled out the word. It was not only Rudi but his parents who had followed his leadership. The son's surprising concern over the passport, their insistence on seeing about his route and his ticket, Rudi's persistence about suggestions for carrying the document—all was now plain. It must be that war was coming and Rudi knew it.
But the news about the Buchers! That was the last straw. "Despicable!" Gard shouted. It wasn't just Rudi but also his parents who had gone along with him. The son's unexpected worry about the passport, their insistence on checking his travel plans and ticket, Rudi's insistence on ideas for handling the document—all of it made sense now. It had to be that war was coming and Rudi was aware of it.
Dastards! To betray their guest, to cause him to go through this miserable experience, endanger his health when he had lately been in a sick bed! Their kind hospitality, their flush demonstrations of friendliness, their little presents! This was the final mark that,[334] to Gard Kirtley, branded the German as only a partly reclaimed Goth.
Dastards! To betray their guest, to make him go through this terrible experience, risking his health when he had just been sick! Their so-called hospitality, their enthusiastic displays of friendship, their small gifts! This was the final evidence that, [334] to Gard Kirtley, labeled the German as only a partially reformed Goth.
Perhaps the atmosphere of restraint he had detected in the Buchers at the last, amid all their cordial expressions and deeds, was due to the changed rôle they then knew they were playing as against an American "pig." At their frontier all human relations—obligations, honor, amicability, trust, good faith, religion—were exchangeable for brutality and dastardly brutality.
Perhaps the sense of restraint he had noticed in the Buchers at the end, despite all their friendly words and actions, was because they realized their new role in relation to an American "pig." At their border, all human relationships—obligations, honor, friendliness, trust, good faith, religion—were traded for brutality and cowardly cruelty.
Yet who in 1914 would have believed such things? It was the case of old Rome asleep, with barbarians swarming in Europe. Gard kept coming back to the sole word for it all—Hun!—in the Anderson definition.
Yet who in 1914 would have believed such things? It was like old Rome sleeping, with barbarians flooding Europe. Gard kept returning to one word for it all—Hun!—according to the Anderson definition.
And what to do with the Huns—about them? Can the world ever get on a genuine, fraternal basis for living with them? Can they ever be made to become like other people? These questions kept surging through his mind as he hurried along.
And what to do about the Huns? Can the world ever find a true, friendly way to live with them? Can they ever be made to be like everyone else? These questions kept racing through his mind as he rushed along.
When Holland was reached that morning, his passport was declared impeccable and his faithful trunk caused him no trouble. Although the war excitement was seizing that region he fortunately met no delay in getting[335] to the coast. Once out of Deutschland he felt amazingly well despite the weariness of his exhausting night. He concluded that the vigorous exercise and sweating he had been through had steamed out of him the vileness he had found in Germany. It acted like a rejuvenating process. Gard now seemed to himself like a clean, new man. He was to be a new man.
When he arrived in Holland that morning, his passport was flawless, and his trusty trunk caused him no issues. Although there was a lot of war tension in the area, he was fortunately able to reach the coast without any delays. Once he was out of Germany, he felt surprisingly good despite being tired from his long night. He figured that the intense exercise and sweating he had gone through had flushed out the negativity he had encountered in Germany. It felt like a revitalizing experience. Gard now saw himself as a fresh, new person. He was determined to be a new man.
CHAPTER XLII
The Anti-Christians
IN England, when war came, the confusion was unbelievable. All that Gard had seen, heard, gone through in Deutschland proved the awfulness of the Force flung against Europe which had stupidly considered itself civilized.
IN England, when the war started, the chaos was unimaginable. Everything Gard had experienced, heard, and witnessed in Germany showed just how terrible the military force unleashed on Europe was, which had foolishly viewed itself as civilized.
He was burning to enlist. But what a chagrin to find his services not wanted! The only satisfaction he could get lay in the suggestion to wait. The more he was put off, the more he was bent on reaching the firing line.
He was eager to enlist. But what a disappointment to find out his services weren’t needed! The only comfort he could find was in the advice to wait. The more he was delayed, the more determined he became to get to the front lines.
In his enforced and impatient idleness he took out his German note book and began writing letters to Rebner in America, thus giving partial vent to his own feelings. The following brief extracts were written first as he went about different camps, offering himself, then at the front:
In his forced and restless downtime, he took out his German notebook and started writing letters to Rebner in America, giving some release to his own emotions. The following brief excerpts were written first as he moved between different camps, offering himself, then at the front:
England, October, 1914.
England, October 1914.
... You know how I went to Germany at your urging, with every favorable impulse toward the Germans. But you had little idea what they are. If our fellow-Americans realized what was thought and said of them beyond the Rhine, they would be in battle now.
... You know how I went to Germany because you encouraged me, with a positive attitude towards the Germans. But you had no clue what they are really like. If our fellow Americans understood what people think and say about them across the Rhine, they would be in a fight right now.
As there is no prospect of our Government wanting fighting men, I am trying to get into the English service. No success yet....
As there’s no chance that our Government needs soldiers, I’m trying to join the English service. No luck so far....
How could you, my good mentor, be so in error about the race from which you sprang? Had you been in Germany, the scales would have dropped from your eyes. You have never lived with the Germans there—only read the best about the "most advanced" of mankind. They are so different from our American-Germans. You did not know that the educated Teuton at home is apt to be dirty in his person and habits, eats with his knife, walks before women, kicks his children about, has coarse or vulgar ideas on[338] female chastity, enjoys the obscene, has no good words to say of anyone beyond his boundaries.
How could you, my dear mentor, be so wrong about the race you come from? If you had been in Germany, you would have seen things clearly. You’ve never lived among the Germans there—only read the best about the "most advanced" people in the world. They are so different from our American-Germans. You didn’t realize that the educated German at home can be unkempt and have poor habits, eats with his knife, walks in front of women, pushes his kids around, has crude or vulgar views on female virtue, enjoys the obscene, and has nothing good to say about anyone outside his own circle.
Pray do not fancy I am pretending to chide you. Weren't we all like you in America, dazzled before what apparently we were humbly ready to admit as the super-race? And yet in a multitude of ways it is so obviously a people set off by itself in much barbarism. There is its Gothic script which offends the eye somewhat like outlandish runes. Its very language growls and snorts at you, sounds threatening as if angry—pardon me for these sentences! There are its mud-colored towns and architecture, its rude life, rough skinned, hairy, ferocious, with tastelessness prevailing.
Please don't think I'm trying to scold you. Weren't we all like you in America, amazed by what we were somewhat willing to accept as the superior race? Yet, in many ways, it’s obvious that this is a people set apart in a kind of barbarism. There’s its Gothic script that looks off-putting, almost like strange runes. Its very language growls and snorts at you, sounding menacing as if it's angry—sorry for these comments! There are its dull-colored towns and architecture, its rough lifestyle, coarse and hairy, fierce, with a general lack of taste.
The German imagination is never shot through with clear, happy sunshine. The German emotions are distinctively expressed by thumpings in some form. The Teuton's inability to see himself as another sees him—is this not, above all, the stamp of an under-civilized people?...
The German imagination is never filled with bright, cheerful sunshine. The German emotions are uniquely demonstrated through some kind of pounding. The Teuton's inability to view himself from another's perspective—is this not, above all, the mark of an under-civilized people?...
England, October, 1914.
England, October 1914.
... Do not think I am unduly harsh, prejudiced, revengeful. I am trying to write in measured terms of what has been forced in upon me and my attention against my wish or expectations.
... Don’t think I’m being too harsh, biased, or vengeful. I’m just trying to express what has been imposed on me and my focus against my will or expectations.
I have met but one American who said that war was at hand and knew what the Germans really are at home. He was an elderly journalist in Dresden who was jeered at until he almost imagined himself mentally unbalanced. Others thought him so, at any rate.
I have only met one American who said that war was coming and understood what the Germans are really like at home. He was an older journalist in Dresden who was mocked so much that he nearly believed he was losing his mind. Others certainly thought he was.
But Anderson was a true prophet. Dear isolated, desolated soul! I wonder where he is now. I wonder if he got out safely. How I wish I could grasp his hand and say, How wise were your convictions!
But Anderson was a true prophet. Dear lonely, broken soul! I wonder where he is now. I wonder if he made it out okay. How I wish I could take his hand and say, How wise were your beliefs!
Like myself he had gone to Deutschland to admire and love the Germans. But he found what I found—an astonishing amount of ruthlessness. How could one expect that the ultimate world-justice and world-humanity were to evolve out of a race to which the army,[340] armed soldiers and statesmen clad in steel, stand for so much?
Like me, he went to Germany to appreciate and love the Germans. But he discovered what I did—an incredible level of ruthlessness. How could anyone expect that ultimate world justice and humanity would come from a nation whose army,[340] soldiers, and politicians dressed in armor represent so much?
How could anything of universal good come from a people who consider nothing from the viewpoint of a kindly common brotherhood? Contempt, intolerance, physical force, are what they gloat over in international relations. I discovered that when they must ask pardon or make amends, they do so with bad grace. They do not take a magnanimous and frank satisfaction or pleasure in righting a wrong.
How could anything truly good come from a people who don't see things through the lens of a shared humanity? They revel in contempt, intolerance, and brute force when dealing with each other on the global stage. I found that when they need to apologize or make up for something, they do it reluctantly. They don't find true satisfaction or joy in correcting a mistake.
You would not believe how lacking their character is in the capacity for penitence, for atonement. We will never see them sorry for any of their present enormities. The still, small voice in them has not been allowed to develop. Their notion of ethics is so different that it is inadmissible from our standards.
You wouldn't believe how little regret they have for their actions, how little they seek forgiveness. They will never express remorse for any of their current wrongdoings. The quiet conscience within them hasn't been nurtured. Their sense of ethics is so different that it doesn't align with our standards.
To be sensitive, grieve, suffer morally, is apart from their normal consciousness. For all this tender and beautiful side of human nature they substitute only the discomforted feelings of defeat. No matter how this present conflict ends, he who[341] looks for any sympathetic actions or noble regrets from them will be dumfounded....
To be sensitive, to grieve, to suffer morally is outside their usual awareness. For all this delicate and beautiful aspect of human nature, they only replace it with the uncomfortable feelings of defeat. Regardless of how this current conflict wraps up, anyone who[341] expects any empathetic actions or noble regrets from them will be shocked....
England, November, 1914.
England, Nov 1914.
Hurrah! I am at last, after disappointments and frettings, under way for Flanders. Lo, I am become, as it were, an Englishman! The British now see the full peril and are taking almost any kind of men, and I'm going along. I suppose it is because I am so keyed up that I feel so well. I'm surprised at myself. I guess I must have, after all, a little good Anglo-Saxon grit in me.
Hurrah! I’m finally on my way to Flanders after all the setbacks and frustrations! It feels like I’m becoming, in a way, an Englishman! The British are now fully aware of the danger and are accepting just about anyone, and I’m joining in. I think it’s because I’m so excited that I feel great. I’m surprised by myself. I guess I must have a bit of that good old Anglo-Saxon determination in me after all.
I am trying to write this scrawl to you on a round milk container in a camp near London. We are not permitted to tell where....
I’m trying to write this note to you on a round milk container in a camp near London. We aren’t allowed to say where....
As I was on the point of saying in my last letter, Jesus is never a watchword in Germany. The Nazarene meekness makes small appeal there. All is Gott. The Teuton regards Christ as too much of a weakling. Had He an army? Could He shoot, as all Germans can?[342] He would not fight and therefore was properly destroyed. If His foolish ideas were followed, the weak would eventually rule the earth whereas, to the German mind, the strong should manifestly rule the earth. The strongest are the fittest, and the fittest should alone survive.
As I was about to mention in my last letter, Jesus is not really a rallying figure in Germany. The humble demeanor of the Nazarene doesn't resonate much there. Everything is about God. The German sees Christ as too much of a pushover. Did He have an army? Could He shoot, like all Germans can? He wouldn't fight, so it was right that He was destroyed. If people followed His naive ideas, the weak would end up ruling the world, whereas, in the German view, the strong should clearly be in charge. The strongest are the fittest, and only the fittest should survive.[342]
To the Goth the Christian religion and philosophy are baneful, baleful. As the result of their feeble policy was not Christ followed—the Germans claim—by the Dark Ages when mankind was obsessed by His superstitious worship? Lifting men out of this morass, the proper practical, scientific and warlike forces came at length into play and we have the magnificent modern régime whose basis is armed strength.
To the Goth, the Christian religion and philosophy are harmful and destructive. They argue that Christ was not followed because of their weak policies, leading to the Dark Ages when humanity was consumed by superstitions. Eventually, emerging from this confusion, the right practical, scientific, and military forces came into action, resulting in the grand modern system that’s built on military power.
Hence—it is argued—Germany came into her own and inevitably leads the world. She represents the perfection of organized physical and mental powers which are the antitheses of the Christ ideal.
Hence—it is argued—Germany became her own and inevitably leads the world. She represents the perfection of organized physical and mental abilities, which are the opposites of the Christ ideal.
And so you never hear much in Deutschland about Peace and Good Will, Do as You would be Done by, Faith,[343] Hope and Charity and the greatest of these is Charity. Such Christian texts and mottoes, which fill our American homes, churches and public places, are little in evidence in Germany because they do not enter into the life. The popular nomenclature is pagan rather than Biblical. Already in this war we behold the Kaiser drawing his names for forts and trenches from his wild pagan mythology, not from Christian sources. And in Deutschland, acts in the field count for so much more than words in the pulpit.
And so you don’t hear much in Germany about peace and goodwill, treating others as you want to be treated, faith, hope, and charity, with the greatest of these being charity. These Christian texts and mottos, which fill our American homes, churches, and public spaces, are rarely seen in Germany because they don’t play a role in daily life. The common language is more pagan than biblical. Already in this war, we see the Kaiser naming his forts and trenches after his wild pagan mythology, rather than from Christian origins. And in Germany, actions in the field matter a lot more than words from the pulpit.
If the Huns win, Teuton hate will, of course, succeed Christian love as the human creed. Friendship, as we know it, will largely cease to exist. Friends will be those who can be cowed into truculence or bought. There will be no truth, justice, equity, in our meaning. Only the will or whim of the Emperor. His State Church, with its worship of Him, will grow as the church.
If the Huns win, Teuton hatred will inevitably replace Christian love as the guiding belief of humanity. Friendship, as we understand it, will mostly vanish. Friends will be those who can be intimidated into aggression or purchased. There will be no truth, justice, or fairness as we perceive them. Only the desires or whims of the Emperor will matter. His State Church, centered around the worship of Him, will become the dominant church.
Everything that southern and western Europe stands for, from ancient Greece to the northern points of Scotland and Ireland (with America in addition)[344]—beauty, loveableness, the brightness of life with its joyousness, gayety, grace, charm—will be stamped down under the metallic heels of the Kaiser's battalions and bureaucrats....
Everything that southern and western Europe represents, from ancient Greece to the northern regions of Scotland and Ireland (plus America) [344]—beauty, lovability, the vibrancy of life with its joy, cheerfulness, elegance, charm—will be crushed under the heavy boots of the Kaiser's armies and officials...
Boulogne, January, 1915.
Boulogne, January 1915.
After what I have written you from Germany, and since, about my unexpected disillusionment, you will ask me:
After what I've shared with you from Germany, and since then about my unexpected disappointment, you might ask me:
"Well, enough of this. What ought to be done or can be done about it?"
"Okay, that's enough of this. What should be done or can be done about it?"
I am thinking about a solution. Not original, for its framework was suggested by my old journalistic friend. I will send you an outline of his idea as he gave it to me one day. All that he said and prophesied has come so direfully true that I have now full faith and confidence in his vision and practical sense on the subject of the Goth race. For he lived and observed among them seven years.
I'm considering a solution. It's not my own idea, since my old journalist friend suggested the framework. I’ll send you an outline of his concept as he shared it with me one day. Everything he said and predicted has turned out to be so disturbingly accurate that I now have complete faith and confidence in his insights and practical understanding of the Goth race. After all, he lived and observed them for seven years.
That's the great point—living together. And I do not mean living together when people are mature or old but when young—when minds, sympathies, etc., are plas[345]tic and pliable. As long as the young Germans are kept home—never sent abroad unless as spies in some form—the Teutons will remain Huns.
That's the key point—living together. And I don't mean living together when people are mature or old, but when they're young—when minds, sympathies, etc., are plas[345]tic and flexible. As long as young Germans are kept at home—never sent abroad unless as spies in some way—the Teutons will stay Huns.
Granted that they can't help it if they are born with the Hun strain in their blood which their education or instruction not only preserves but enrages. Admit that they want any barbarism eliminated from their veins. That would be an important point over which our world should hold out to them the glad hand....
Granted that they can't help it if they're born with the Hun strain in their blood, which their education or instruction not only preserves but intensifies. Acknowledge that they want any barbarism wiped from their veins. That would be an important point over which our world should extend a welcoming hand....
Don't be offended, but the best thing that I learned in college was to throw well from left field. At any rate it saved my life, I suppose, at Aix. And I've grown wonderfully fond of pepper. It braces a chap for this Iceland wind that howls down upon us at times. We call baseball and football a part of education. Good, brave things. The Germans don't have them because they have only "instruction."
Don't take this the wrong way, but the best thing I learned in college was how to throw well from left field. Anyway, I guess it saved my life at Aix. I've also developed a real love for pepper. It helps me get through this icy wind that howls down on us sometimes. We consider baseball and football part of our education. They're great, brave activities. The Germans don't have these because they only focus on "instruction."
From what I observed beyond the Rhine, education is a growth in free and liberal countries. As we are seeing in the war, German instruction turns out ex[346]perts, but also intellectual monsters and scientific fiends—instructed heathens....
From what I've seen beyond the Rhine, education thrives in free and liberal countries. As we're witnessing in the war, German education produces experts, but also intellectual monsters and scientific fiends—instructed heathens....
Strange to say, I don't believe I could have stood this existence here if my system had not got a good cleansing out when I was sick. I am all the time thinking about the Huns. And it is strictly necessary hereabouts.
Strangely enough, I don't think I could have endured this existence here if I hadn't had a thorough cleansing when I was sick. I constantly think about the Huns. And it's absolutely essential around here.
CHAPTER XLIII
The Teuton Problem: A Solution
Flanders, a Mudhole, February, 1915.
Flanders, a mud pit, February 1915.
... Is not my old friend Anderson's plan the only natural, practical, efficient method by which to humanize their barbarous instincts? Assuming that they will be defeated, as they must be, the Anderson project, as you see, is that a permanent arrangement must be offered them, and if necessary enforced upon them, whereby a multitude of young German men and women shall be sent yearly to foreign democratic lands to live and be educated there for a period. By attractive scholarships, by pecuniary inducements or by any of a number of programmes, young Germans can be tempted to this step. In living and study[348]ing, before middle age, under free and liberal conditions, they will begin looking at foreigners in a friendly, or what we should call a Christian, manner. After awhile, after generations perhaps, this leaven will work in the thick, tough, sour Teuton dough. It will transform the people. They will gradually become allies at heart instead of remaining hostiles.
... Isn't my old friend Anderson's plan the only natural, practical, and effective way to humanize their brutal instincts? Assuming they will be defeated, as they must be, the Anderson project, as you see, is that a permanent arrangement must be offered to them, and if necessary enforced upon them, where a large number of young German men and women will be sent each year to foreign democratic countries to live and be educated there for a period. Through attractive scholarships, financial incentives, or various programs, young Germans can be encouraged to take this step. By living and studying[348] abroad before middle age, under free and liberal conditions, they will start to view foreigners in a friendly, or what we would call a Christian, way. Over time, perhaps after generations, this influence will permeate the thick, tough, sour Teuton character. It will change the people. They will gradually become allies at heart instead of remaining adversaries.
As it is now, the German eats, drinks, bathes, and nauseatingly does other elemental things much as he did a hundred years ago, because he receives his instruction in his homeland with the idea, not only complacent but aggressive, that his habits are the best. And this is for the reason that he has seen no other kind when young. Do you think, for instance, that a youthful German, after living in the freedom of our young sexes, would return to the Rhine and long be content with the iron-like Teuton customs in love, courtship and marriage?
As it is now, the German eats, drinks, bathes, and annoyingly does other basic things much the same way he did a hundred years ago, because he learns in his homeland with the mindset, not only self-satisfied but assertive, that his habits are the best. This is because he hasn't experienced any other way when he was young. Do you think, for instance, that a young German, after experiencing the freedom of our modern relationships, would return to the Rhine and be happy with the strict German customs in love, dating, and marriage for long?
A youthful person is apt to admire the people among whom he is staying a long while for the reason that, under such cir[349]cumstances, aliens are kind. He will always take pride in these foreign connections, pride in what he has learned abroad. He will think himself more fortunate and more advanced than his fellow stay-at-homes. The young German, becoming used to more amiable modes of existence, would naturally become more or less fond of them. A broader, more human social spirit—the true social spirit—would get a hold in him.
A young person is likely to admire the people around them during a long stay because, in those situations, outsiders tend to be kind. They will always take pride in these foreign connections and in what they've learned while abroad. They may view themselves as luckier and more enlightened than those who stayed home. The young German, getting used to friendlier ways of living, would naturally become somewhat attached to them. A broader, more human social spirit—the real social spirit—would take root in them.
I would go further than my friend Anderson. I would have all civilized countries adopt this plan with one another as well as with Germany. The trouble with civilization, as seen in this war, is that no people understands or truly sympathizes with any foreign nation—not even among the Allies. They are strangers because they have been kept strangers. This creates suspicion, envy, enmity, for they have not in any noticeable degree lived together. They do not know one another's customs, habits, perspectives. As a result, armies, navies, tariffs, treaties backed by force, are necessary to hold civilization precariously in[350] shape—and at what colossal effort, anxiety, expense? The different languages, literatures, arts, educations, religions, should become familiar to large numbers in each race and be the open, peaceful highways back and forth instead of, as now, barriers.
I would go further than my friend Anderson. I would have all civilized countries adopt this plan with one another as well as with Germany. The issue with civilization, as shown in this war, is that no nation truly understands or sympathizes with any foreign country—not even among the Allies. They are strangers because they have been kept apart. This leads to suspicion, envy, and hostility, as they haven't lived together in any meaningful way. They don't know each other's customs, habits, or perspectives. As a result, armies, navies, tariffs, and treaties enforced by force are needed to maintain civilization in a precarious state—and at what immense cost, stress, and effort? The different languages, literatures, arts, educations, and religions should be familiar to many in each race and serve as open, peaceful pathways for exchange instead of, as they are now, barriers.
Flanders, another Mudhole, February, 1915.
Flanders, another mud pit, February 1915.
... I see the woeful, tragic need for this international co-education all around us here at the front. The Canadians, Australians, English, French, all quarreling back and forth and pulling against one another as unfriendly strangers.
... I see the sad, tragic need for this international co-education all around us here at the front. The Canadians, Australians, English, and French are all fighting among themselves and pulling against each other like unfriendly strangers.
Germany is giving—has given—one great lesson to them all and to us Americans at home. And that is, IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH.
Germany is teaching—has taught—everyone, including us Americans back home, an important lesson. And that is, IN UNION THERE IS STRENGTH.
After this war the tremendous question before the world will be:
After this war, the huge question facing the world will be:
How are we going to live with the Germans?—how get on with them?
How are we going to live with the Germans?—how will we get along with them?
The only true and gracious solution I can see is—To associate and study to[351]gether when young! Would not you—would not everyone—agree that this interchange in education, which would not be very troublesome or expensive, is a true manner in which to remove from the German make-up its savage, destructive animus toward mankind? In order really to change a race, the work must be done from the inside outward. And this means some form of education, not merely victories, edicts, Leagues.
The only real and kind solution I see is—To get together and learn[351]when we’re young! Wouldn’t you—wouldn’t everyone—agree that this exchange in education, which wouldn’t be very difficult or costly, is a genuine way to remove the aggressive, destructive tendencies from the German mindset toward humanity? To truly change a culture, the work has to start from within. And that means some form of education, not just victories, laws, or alliances.
Let or make the Teutons be associated with gentler cultures than their own. What if it does take a hundred, two hundred, years! What is that compared with having the German problem and menace unsolved in the future as in the past?
Let the Teutons be linked to gentler cultures than their own. So what if it takes a hundred, two hundred years? What does that matter compared to facing the German problem and threat unsolved in the future as it has been in the past?
Such young German missionaries year after year, as I have indicated, would be bringing back something of sweetness and light to their stubborn, irascible folk. The powerful and exacerbated bias of this folk toward the echt Deutsch would be neutralized and mollified under the contact of its youths with dispositions making for kindliness and courtesy. Confessedly the stoutest race prejudices lie with those who[352] have never stepped outside their own boundaries.
Such young German missionaries year after year, as I mentioned, would bring back some positivity and warmth to their stubborn, irritable community. The strong and heightened bias of these people towards the echt Deutsch would be lessened and softened through their youths' interactions with attitudes that promote kindness and politeness. It’s true that the strongest racial prejudices are found among those who[352] have never ventured beyond their own borders.
It is true this plan, in a small way, was tried under the exchange of professors scheme. But the Kaiser won out in that because his professors were too old and, it develops, were simply his emissaries with hostile inclinations and intent. It would appear that most of the young Americans who are partly educated in Germany are pro-German. Had they gone to England or France, they would be pro-British or pro-French.
It’s true that this plan was tested on a small scale with the professor exchange program. However, the Kaiser succeeded in that because his professors were too old and turned out to be just his representatives with hostile intentions. It seems that most of the young Americans who receive part of their education in Germany tend to be pro-German. If they had studied in England or France, they would likely be pro-British or pro-French.
It is now being shown that the German's education or instruction does not do away with the Hun element in him. The logical thing, then, is to try foreign education on him. He needs to learn in other countries, and to live out, their meanings of good faith and a give-and-take, manly spirit. For he at present considers it right to have no respect for his own spoken word to foreigners, or even his written word.
It is now being shown that the German's education or training doesn't eliminate the Hun aspect in him. The logical step, then, is to try foreign education on him. He needs to learn in other countries and to live out their values of good faith and a spirit of give-and-take. Right now, he thinks it's acceptable to have no respect for his own spoken promises to foreigners, or even his written commitments.
This is his old habit of the tribal fanatic. To lie to, to cheat, to steal from, to kill, aliens is no admitted sin in the[353] moral decalogue of the Germans when an advantage can be derived. Murder, senseless destruction, violation of women, obscenity, do not therefore horrify them. If you as a foreigner strike the metallic shield of their character, no resounding ringing of what we know as conscience is heard, because extreme erudition in Germany largely takes the place of moral feelings. "Science without conscience is the death of man." And the women and State religion are as Hunnish as the males. All these influences make for war.
This is his old habit of a tribal fanatic. Lying to, cheating, stealing from, and killing outsiders is not seen as a sin in the[353] moral code of the Germans when there’s a benefit to be gained. Murder, pointless destruction, assaulting women, and obscenity don’t shock them. If you, as a foreigner, challenge their character, you won’t hear the sound of what we call conscience, because in Germany, extensive education often replaces moral feelings. "Science without conscience is the death of man." And the women and state religion are just as brutal as the men. All these factors contribute to war.
This conscienceless dullness, or immense hollowness, in the Teuton people always suggests to me an eggshell encased in the pomp of steel. Should they be defeated, I feel that the nation may cave in tremendously, horribly. How can it be otherwise with a race that never sees anything foolish in itself, and exaggerates the core of its costly army and bureaucracy at the expense of the kernel?
This mindless dullness, or huge emptiness, in the German people always makes me think of an eggshell wrapped in shiny steel. If they were to be defeated, I fear that the nation could collapse dramatically and shockingly. How could it be any different for a race that never recognizes its own foolishness and inflates the importance of its expensive military and bureaucracy while neglecting the essentials?
By living abroad a part of their study years the young Germans would little by little come to prefer to substitute amity[354] for armaments, confident trust for suspicion, love as a motto instead of hate. For they would see that other peoples are worthy to live. They would learn more chivalry toward women and children, the beautiful significance of humanity and of universal brotherhood. They would learn that what they call weakness desirably lends delicacy, tenderness, spiritual and moral loveliness to existence which the coarse bigness and bow-wowness of the German ideal itself will never attain....
By spending part of their study years abroad, young Germans would gradually come to prefer friendship[354] over weapons, trust over suspicion, and love as a guiding principle instead of hate. They would realize that other nations are deserving of life. They would gain more respect for women and children, appreciating the beautiful significance of humanity and universal brotherhood. They would understand that what they perceive as weakness can actually bring delicacy, tenderness, and moral beauty to existence—qualities that the roughness and arrogance of the German ideal itself will never achieve....
When March came, and the birds flew back to find no trees, no grass, no flowers, Gard Kirtley, in his spring-time of life, stepped out from his dugout in Flanders with a gun, and faced the Huns of the northeast. He was prepared to greet Death which is the fruit of old age but which in youth appears as with a crown of laurel.
When March arrived, and the birds flew back to find no trees, no grass, no flowers, Gard Kirtley, in the springtime of his life, stepped out from his dugout in Flanders with a gun and confronted the Huns in the northeast. He was ready to face Death, which is the result of old age but seems like a victory in youth.
THE END
THE END
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