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Transcriber’s Note:


Inconsistent hyphenation and spelling in the original document have been preserved. There are many uncommon words in this text.

Inconsistent hyphenation and spelling in the original document have been preserved. There are many uncommon words in this text.

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WOMAN

HER SEX AND LOVE LIFE

BY

WILLIAM J. ROBINSON, M.D.

Chief of the Department of Genito-Urinary Diseases and Dermatology, Bronx Hospital Dispensary Editor of the American Journal of Urology and Sexology; Editor of The Critic and Guide; Author of Treatment of Sexual Impotence and Other Sexual Disorders in Men and Women; Treatment of Gonorrhea in Men and Women; Limitation of Offspring by the Prevention of Conception; Sex Knowledge for Girls and Women; Sexual Problems of Today; Never-Told Tales; Eugenics and Marriage, etc. Fellow of the New York Academy of Medicine, of the American Medical Editors' Association, American Medical Association, New York State Medical Society, Internationale Gesellschaft für Sexualforschung, American Genetic Association, American Association for the Advancement of Science, American Urological Association, etc., etc.

Chief of the Department of Genito-Urinary Diseases and Dermatology at the Bronx Hospital Dispensary. Editor of the American Journal of Urology and Sexology; Editor of The Critic and Guide; Author of Treatment of Sexual Impotence and Other Sexual Disorders in Men and Women; Treatment of Gonorrhea in Men and Women; Limiting Offspring by Preventing Conception; Sex Knowledge for Girls and Women; Sexual Problems of Today; Never-Told Tales; Eugenics and Marriage, etc. Member of the New York Academy of Medicine, the American Medical Editors' Association, American Medical Association, New York State Medical Society, International Society for Sexual Research, American Genetic Association, American Association for the Advancement of Science, American Urological Association, etc., etc.




ILLUSTRATED

TWENTY-FIRST EDITION




1929
EUGENICS PUBLISHING COMPANY
NEW YORK






Copyright, 1917,
By Eugenics Publishing Co.









Press of
J.J. Little & Ives Co.
New York






THE CREATION OF WOMAN


This old Oriental legend is so exquisitely charming, so superior to the Biblical narrative of the creation of woman, that it deserves to be reproduced in Woman: Her Sex and Love Life. There are several variants of this legend, but I reproduce it as it appeared in the first issue of The Critic and Guide, January, 1903.

This ancient Eastern legend is incredibly delightful, far better than the Biblical story of the creation of woman, and it deserves to be shared in Woman: Her Sex and Love Life. There are different versions of this legend, but I’m presenting it as it first appeared in The Critic and the Guide, January 1903.

At the beginning of time, Twashtri—the Vulcan of Hindu mythology—created the world. But when he wished to create a woman, he found that he had employed all his materials in the creation of man. There did not remain one solid element. Then Twashtri, perplexed, fell into a profound meditation from which he aroused himself and proceeded as follows:

At the start of the universe, Twashtri—the Vulcan of Hindu mythology—created the world. But when he wanted to create a woman, he realized that he had used up all his materials in making man. There was not a single solid element left. Then Twashtri, confused, fell into a deep meditation, from which he eventually emerged and acted as follows:

He took the roundness of the moon, the undulations of the serpent, the entwinement of clinging plants, the trembling of the grass, the slenderness of the rose-vine and the velvet of the flower, the lightness of the leaf and the glance of the fawn, the gaiety of the sun's rays and tears of the mist, the inconstancy of the wind and the timidity of the hare, the vanity of the peacock and the softness of the down on the throat of the swallow, the hardness of the diamond, the sweet flavor of honey and the cruelty of the tiger, the warmth of fire, the chill of snow, the chatter of the jay and the cooing of the turtle dove.

He observed the roundness of the moon, the curves of the serpent, the way plants wrap around each other, the swaying of the grass, the delicacy of the rose vine and the softness of the flower, the lightness of the leaf and the gaze of the fawn, the joy of the sun's rays and the tears of the mist, the unpredictability of the wind and the shyness of the hare, the pride of the peacock and the softness of the down on the swallow's throat, the toughness of the diamond, the sweetness of honey and the ferocity of the tiger, the warmth of fire, the coldness of snow, the chatter of the jay and the cooing of the turtle dove.

He combined all these and formed a woman. Then he made a present of her to man. Eight days later the man came to Twashtri, and said: "My Lord, the creature you gave me poisons my existence. She chatters without rest, she takes all my time, she laments for nothing at all, and is always ill; take her back;" and Twashtri took the woman back.

He combined all these and created a woman. Then he gifted her to the man. Eight days later, the man came to Twashtri and said: "My Lord, the being you gave me ruins my life. She talks non-stop, takes up all my time, cries over nothing, and is always sick; take her back;" and Twashtri took the woman back.

[4]But eight days later the man came again to the god and said: "My Lord, my life is very solitary since I returned this creature. I remember she danced before me, singing. I recall how she glanced at me from the corner of her eye, how she played with me, clung to me. Give her back to me," and Twashtri returned the woman to him. Three days only passed and Twashtri saw the man coming to him again. "My Lord," said he, "I do not understand exactly how it is, but I am sure that the woman causes me more annoyance than pleasure. I beg you to relieve me of her."

[4]But eight days later, the man returned to the god and said, "My Lord, my life has been very lonely since I returned this woman. I remember how she danced for me, singing. I recall how she would glance at me from the corner of her eye, how she played with me, how she clung to me. Please bring her back to me." And Twashtri returned the woman to him. Just three days later, Twashtri saw the man coming to him again. "My Lord," he said, "I don’t quite understand it, but I’m sure that the woman causes me more trouble than joy. I beg you to help me get rid of her."

But Twashtri cried: "Go your way and do the best you can." And the man cried: "I cannot live with her!" "Neither can you live without her!" replied Twashtri.

But Twashtri shouted, "Go on and do your best." And the man yelled, "I can't live with her!" "But you can't live without her!" retorted Twashtri.

And the man went away sorrowful, murmuring: "Woe is me, I can neither live with nor without her."

And the man walked away sadly, murmuring: "What a pity, I can't live with her or without her."







PREFACE


In the first chapter of this book I have shown, I believe convincingly, why sex knowledge is even more important for women than it is for men. I have examined carefully the books that have been written for girls and women, and I know that it is not bias, nor carping criticism, but strict honesty that forces me to say that I have not found one satisfactory girl's or woman's sex book. There are some excellent books for girls and women on general hygiene; but on sex hygiene, on the general manifestations of the sex instinct, on sex ethics—none. I have attempted to write such a book. Whether I have succeeded—fully, partially or not at all—is not for me to say, though I have my suspicions. But this I know: in writing this book I have been strictly honest with myself, from first page to last. Whether everything I have written is the truth, I do not know. But at least I believe that it is—or I would not have written it. And I can solemnly say that the book is free from any cant, hypocrisy, falsehood, exaggeration or compromise, nor has any attempt been made in any chapter to conciliate the stupid, the ignorant, the pervert, or the sexless.

In the first chapter of this book, I have shown, I believe convincingly, why sexual knowledge is even more important for women than for men. I have carefully examined the books that have been written for girls and women, and I can honestly say that I have not found a single satisfactory sex book for females. There are some excellent books on general hygiene for girls and women, but when it comes to sexual hygiene, the manifestations of the sexual instinct, and sexual ethics—there's nothing. I have attempted to write such a book. Whether I have succeeded—fully, partially, or not at all—is not for me to judge, though I have my suspicions. But what I do know is that I have been completely honest with myself, from the first page to the last. I can't say for sure that everything I have written is the truth, but I believe it is—or I wouldn’t have written it. I can genuinely say that this book is free from any pretense, hypocrisy, falsehood, exaggeration, or compromise, and no attempt has been made in any chapter to appease the foolish, the ignorant, the perverted, or the sexless.

[6]As in all my other books I have used plain, honest English. Not any plainer than necessary, but plain enough to avoid obscurity and misconception.

[6]As in all my other books, I've used straightforward, honest English. Not more simple than needed, but simple enough to prevent confusion and misunderstanding.

Science and art are both necessary to human happiness. This is not the place to discuss the relative importance of the two. And, while I have no patience with art-for-art's-sake, I recognize that the scientist can not be put into a narrow channel and ordered to go into a certain definite direction. Scientific investigations which seemed aimless and useless have sometimes led to highly important results, and I would not disparage science for its own sake. It has its uses. Nevertheless I personally have no use for it. To me everything must have a direct human purpose, a definite human application. When the cup of human life is so overflowing with woe and pain and misery, it seems to me a narrow dilettanteism or downright charlatanism to devote one's self to petty or bizarre problems which can have no relation to human happiness, and to prate of self-satisfaction and self-expression. One can have all the self-expression one wants while doing useful work.

Science and art are both essential for human happiness. This isn't the time to debate which is more important. While I don't believe in art for art's sake, I understand that scientists can't be forced into a narrow path or told to go in a specific direction. Scientific research that seems pointless or trivial has sometimes led to very significant discoveries, and I wouldn't downplay science just for its own sake. It has its advantages. However, I personally don’t find it useful. For me, everything should have a clear human purpose and practical application. With human life already so full of suffering and pain, it feels like a narrow-minded hobby or even fraud to focus on trivial or strange issues that have no connection to human happiness, while talking about self-satisfaction and self-expression. One can achieve all the self-expression they want while doing meaningful work.

And working for humanity does not exclude a healthy hedonism; not the narrow Cyrenaic, but an enlightened altruistic hedonism. And in writing this book I have kept the human problem constantly before my eyes. It was not my ambition merely to [7]impart interesting facts: my concern was the practical application of these facts, their relation to human happiness.

And working for the betterment of humanity doesn't mean giving up on enjoying life; it's not just about indulgence, but rather a thoughtful and altruistic approach to pleasure. While writing this book, I constantly kept the human issue in mind. My goal wasn't just to [7]share interesting information; I wanted to focus on how these facts can be applied practically and their connection to human happiness.

If this book should be instrumental, as I confidently trust it will, in destroying some medieval superstitions, in dissipating some hampering and cramping errors, in instilling some hope in the hearts of the hopeless, in bringing a little joy into the homes of the joyless, in increasing in however slight a degree the sum total of human happiness, its mission shall have been gloriously fulfilled.

If this book is helpful, as I truly believe it will be, in getting rid of some outdated superstitions, in clearing away some restrictive mistakes, in bringing some hope to those who feel hopeless, in adding a bit of joy to the homes of the joyless, and in increasing, even if just a little, the overall happiness of people, its purpose will have been wonderfully achieved.

For this is the mission of the book: to increase the sum total of human happiness.

For this is the purpose of the book: to boost overall human happiness.

W.J.R.

W.J.R.

12 Mount Morris Park W.,
New York City.
Jan. 1, 1917.

12 Mount Morris Park W.,
NYC.
Jan 1, 1917.







CONTENTS


CHAPTER   PAGE
I. The Paramount Need of Sex Knowledge for Girls and Women 23

Why Sex Knowledge is of Paramount Importance to Girls and Women—Reasons Why a Misstep in a Girl Has More Serious Consequences than a Misstep in a Boy—The Place Love Occupies in Woman's Life—Woman's Physical Disabilities.

Why Understanding Sex is Crucial for Girls and Women—Reasons Why a Mistake by a Girl Has More Serious Consequences than a Mistake by a Boy—The Role Love Plays in a Woman's Life—A Woman's Physical Challenges.

 
II. The Female Sex Organs; Their Anatomy 31

The Internal Sex Organs—The Ovaries—The Fallopian Tubes—The Uterus—The Divisions of the Uterus—Anteversion, Anteflexion, Retroversion, Retroflexion, of the Uterus—Endometritis—The Vagina—The Hymen—Imperforate Hymen—The External Genitals—The Vulva, Labia Majora, Labia Minora, the Mons Veneris, the Clitoris, the Urethra—The Breasts—The Pelvis—The Difference Between the Male and Female Pelvis.

The Internal Sex Organs—The Ovaries—The Fallopian Tubes—The Uterus—The Parts of the Uterus—Anteversion, Anteflexion, Retroversion, Retroflexion of the Uterus—Endometritis—The Vagina—The Hymen—Imperforate Hymen—The External Genitals—The Vulva, Labia Majora, Labia Minora, the Mons Veneris, the Clitoris, the Urethra—The Breasts—The Pelvis—The Difference Between the Male and Female Pelvis.

 
III. The Physiology of the Female Sex Organs 49

Function of the Ovaries—Internal Secretion of the Ovaries—Function of the Internal Secretion—Number of Ova in the Ovaries—The Graafian Follicles—Ovulation—Corpora Lutea—Function of the Fallopian Tubes—Function of the Vagina—Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris and Mons Veneris—Function of the Breasts—Besides Secreting Milk Breast Has Sexual Function—The Orgasm—Pollutions in Women—Secondary Sex Characters—Differences Between Woman and Man.

Function of the Ovaries—Internal Secretion of the Ovaries—Function of the Internal Secretion—Number of Eggs in the Ovaries—The Graafian Follicles—Ovulation—Corpora Lutea—Function of the Fallopian Tubes—Function of the Vagina—Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris, and Mons Veneris—Function of the Breasts—In Addition to Producing Milk, Breasts Have a Sexual Function—The Orgasm—Involuntary Ejaculation in Women—Secondary Sexual Characteristics—Differences Between Women and Men.

 
IV. The Sex Instinct 62

Universality of the Sex Instinct—Not Responsible for Our Thoughts and Feelings.

Universality of the Sex Instinct—Not Responsible for Our Thoughts and Feelings.

 
V. Puberty 65

Physical Changes in Puberty—Physical Changes in the Genital Organs and in the Rest of the Body—Psychic Changes—Puberty and Adolescence—Nubility.

Physical Changes in Puberty—Physical Changes in the Genital Organs and in the Rest of the Body—Emotional Changes—Puberty and Adolescence—Maturity.

 
VI. Menstruation 71[9]

Definition of Menstruation—Where Menstrual Blood Comes From—Age of Menstruation—Age of Cessation of Menstruation—Duration—Amount—Regularity and Irregularity.

Definition of Menstruation—Where Menstrual Blood Comes From—Age When Menstruation Starts—Age When Menstruation Stops—Duration—Amount—Regularity and Irregularity.

 
VII. Abnormalities of Menstruation 75

Disorders of Menstruation—Menorrhagia—Metrorrhagia—Amenorrhea—Vicarious Menstruation—Dysmenorrhea of Organic and of Nervous Origin.

Disorders of Menstruation—Heavy Menstrual Bleeding—Irregular Bleeding—Absence of Menstruation—Alternative Menstruation—Painful Menstrual Periods of Organic and Nervous Origin.

 
VIII. The Hygiene of Menstruation 78

Lack of Cleanliness During Menstrual Period—Superstitious Beliefs—Hygiene of Menstruation.

Lack of Cleanliness During Menstrual Period—Superstitious Beliefs—Hygiene of Menstruation.

 
IX. Fecundation Or Fertilization 82

Fecundation or Fertilization—Process of Fecundation—When the Ovum Matures—Fate of Ovum When no Intercourse Has Taken Place—Entrance of Spermatozoa as Result of Intercourse—The Spermatozoa in Search of the Ovum—Rapidity of Movements of Spermatozoa—Absorption of Spermatozoön by Ovum—Activity of Impregnated Ovum in Finding Place to Develop—Pregnancy in the Fallopian Tube and Its Dangers—Twin Pregnancy—Passivity of Ovum and Activity of Spermatozoön Foretell the Contrasting Rôles of the Man and the Woman Throughout Life.

Fertilization—The Process of Fertilization—When the Egg Matures—What Happens to the Egg If There's No Intercourse—Entry of Sperm from Intercourse—Sperm Searching for the Egg—Speed of Sperm Movement—The Egg Absorbing the Sperm—The Activity of the Fertilized Egg in Finding a Place to Develop—Pregnancy in the Fallopian Tube and Its Risks—Twin Pregnancies—The Passive Role of the Egg and the Active Role of the Sperm Indicate the Different Roles of Men and Women Throughout Life.

 
X. Pregnancy 88

Period of Pregnancy in Human Female—Physiologic Process of Pregnancy—Growth of Embryo from Moment of Conception—Pregnant Woman Provides Nourishment for Two—Her Excreting Organs Must Work for Two.

Period of Pregnancy in Human Female—Physiologic Process of Pregnancy—Growth of Embryo from Moment of Conception—Pregnant Woman Provides Nourishment for Two—Her Excreting Organs Must Work for Two.

 
XI. The Disorders of Pregnancy 93

Smooth Course of Pregnancy in Some Women—Pregnancy and Parturition May be Made Normal Processes Through Education in True Hygiene—Morning Sickness and Its Treatment—Necessity for Medical Advice in Pernicious Vomiting—Anorexia—Bulimia—Aversion Towards Certain Foods—Peculiar Cravings—Tendency to Constipation Aggravated by Pregnancy—Dietary Measures in [10]Constipation—Rectal Injections in Constipation—Laxatives—Cause of Frequent Desire to Urinate During First Two or Three and Last Months of Pregnancy—Treatment of Frequent Urination—Cause of Piles During Pregnancy and Their Treatment—Cause of Itching of External Genitals During Pregnancy and Treatment—Cause of Varicose Veins and Treatment—Liver Spots.

Smooth Course of Pregnancy in Some Women—Pregnancy and Childbirth Can Be Normal Processes Through Education in Proper Hygiene—Morning Sickness and Its Treatment—Need for Medical Advice in Severe Vomiting—Loss of Appetite—Overeating—Dislike for Certain Foods—Unusual Cravings—Increased Constipation During Pregnancy—Dietary Measures in [10]Constipation—Rectal Injections for Constipation—Laxatives—Reasons for Frequent Urination During the First Two or Three and Last Months of Pregnancy—Treatment for Frequent Urination—Reasons for Hemorrhoids During Pregnancy and Their Treatment—Reasons for Itching of External Genitals During Pregnancy and Treatment—Reasons for Varicose Veins and Treatment—Liver Spots.

 
XII. When to Engage a Physician 102

Necessity for the Pregnant Woman Immediately Placing Herself Under Care of Physician and Remaining Under His Care During Entire Period.

Necessity for the Pregnant Woman to Immediately See a Doctor and Stay Under Their Care Throughout the Entire Period.

 
XIII. The Size of the Fetus 105

Approximately Correct Measurements and Weight of Fetus at End of Each Month of Pregnancy.

Approximately Correct Measurements and Weight of Fetus at the End of Each Month of Pregnancy.

 
XIV. The Afterbirth (Placenta) and Cord 108

How the Afterbirth Develops—Bag of Waters—Umbilical Cord—The Navel—Fetus Nourished by Absorption—Fetus Breathes by Aid of Placenta—No Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child.

How the Afterbirth Develops—Amniotic Sac—Umbilical Cord—The Belly Button—Fetus Nourished by Absorption—Fetus Breathes with Help of the Placenta—No Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child.

 
XV. Lactation or Nursing 110

No Perfect Substitute for Mother's Milk—When Nursing is Injurious to Mother and Child—Modified Milk—Artificial Foods—Care Essential in Selecting Wet Nurse—Suckling Child Benefits Mother—Reciprocal Affection Strengthened by Nursing—Sexual Feelings While Nursing—Alcoholics are Injurious—Attention to Condition of Nipples During Pregnancy Essential—Treatment of Sunken Nipples—Treatment of Tender Nipples—Treatment of Cracked Nipples—How to Stop the Secretion of Milk When Necessary—Menstruation While Nursing—Pregnancy in the Nursing Woman.

No Perfect Substitute for Mother's Milk—When Nursing is Harmful to Mother and Child—Modified Milk—Artificial Foods—Care is Essential in Choosing a Wet Nurse—Suckling Benefits the Mother—Nursing Strengthens Mutual Affection— Sexual Feelings During Nursing—Alcohol Consumption is Harmful—Attention to Nipple Condition During Pregnancy is Important—Treatment for Sunken Nipples—Treatment for Tender Nipples—Treatment for Cracked Nipples—How to Stop Milk Production When Necessary—Menstruation While Nursing—Pregnancy in Nursing Women.

 
XVI. Abortion and Miscarriage 117

Definition of Word Abortion—Definition of Word Miscarriage—Spontaneous Abortion—Induced Abortion—Therapeutic Abortion—Criminal Abortion—Missed Abortion—Habitual Abortion—[11]Syphilis as Cause of Abortion and Miscarriage—Dangers of Abortion—Abortion an Evil.

Definition of Word Abortion—Definition of Word Miscarriage—Spontaneous Abortion—Induced Abortion—Therapeutic Abortion—Criminal Abortion—Missed Abortion—Habitual Abortion—[11]Syphilis as a Cause of Abortion and Miscarriage—Dangers of Abortion—Abortion as a Harmful Act.

 
XVII. Prenatal Care 121

Meaning of the Term—Misleading Information by Quasi-Scientists—Exaggerated Ideas Regarding Prenatal Care—Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child—Cases Under Author's Observation—Effects on Offspring—Advice to Pregnant Women—Germ-plasm of Chronic Alcoholic—A Glass of Wine and the Spermatozoa—False Statements—Cases of Violence and Accidents During Pregnancy.

Meaning of the Term—Misleading Information by Quasi-Scientists—Exaggerated Ideas Regarding Prenatal Care—Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child—Cases Under Author's Observation—Effects on Offspring—Advice to Pregnant Women—Genetic Material of Chronic Alcoholic—A Glass of Wine and the Sperm—False Statements—Cases of Violence and Accidents During Pregnancy.

 
XVIII. The Menopause, or Change of Life 128

Time of Menopause—Cause of Suffering During Menopause—Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Not Synonymous—Increased Libido During Menopause—Change of Life in Men.

Time of Menopause—Cause of Suffering During Menopause—Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Are Not the Same—Increased Libido During Menopause—Change of Life in Men.

 
XIX. The Habit of Masturbation 135

Definition of Masturbation—Its Injurious Effects in Girls as Compared with Boys—Married Life of the Girl Masturbator—Necessity for Change in Injurious Attitude of Parents who Discover the Habit—Common-sense Treatment of the Habit—How to Prevent Formation of Habit—Parents' Advice to Children—Hot Baths as Factor in Masturbation—Other Physical Factors—Mental Masturbation and Its Effects.

Definition of Masturbation—Its Harmful Effects on Girls Compared to Boys—The Married Life of a Girl Who Masturbates—Need for Change in the Negative Attitude of Parents Who Find Out About the Habit—Practical Approaches to Dealing with the Habit—How to Prevent the Development of the Habit—Advice for Parents to Give Their Children—Hot Baths as a Factor in Masturbation—Other Physical Factors—Mental Masturbation and Its Effects.

 
XX. Leucorrhea—the Whites 143

Misconception Regarding the Meaning of the Term "Leucorrhea"—A Common Complaint—Severe Cases—Reasons for Resistance to Treatment—Proper Local Treatment of the Disorder—Sterility Due to Leucorrhea—Causes of Leucorrhea—Tonic Medicines—Local Treatment—Formulæ for Douching.

Misunderstanding About the Meaning of the Term "Leucorrhea"—A Common Issue—Severe Cases—Reasons for Reluctance to Seek Treatment—Proper Local Treatment of the Condition—Infertility Related to Leucorrhea—Causes of Leucorrhea—Tonic Medications—Local Treatment—Recipes for Douching.

 
XXI. The Venereal Diseases 149

Derivation of Word "Venereal"—Three Venereal Diseases—Innocent Contraction of Syphilis Through Various Objects—The Hygienic Elimination of Common Sources of Venereal Infection—Measures [12]for Prevention After Sexual Relations.

Derivation of the Word "Venereal"—Three Venereal Diseases—Innocent Contraction of Syphilis Through Various Objects—The Hygienic Elimination of Common Sources of Venereal Infection—Measures [12]for Prevention After Sexual Relations.

 
XXII. The Extent of Venereal Disease 151

Former Ban on Discussion of Venereal Disease and Its Evil Results—Present Reprehensible Exaggerations of Extent of Venereal Disease—Erroneous and Ridiculous Statements of "Reformers"—Senseless Fear of Marriage in Girls Due to Lurid Exaggerations—Study by Woman Psychologist Reveals Harmful Results of Exaggerated Statements—Truth in Regard to Percentage of Men Afflicted with Venereal Disease.

Former Ban on Discussing Sexually Transmitted Infections and Its Negative Effects—Current Unjustified Exaggerations About the Prevalence of Sexually Transmitted Infections—Incorrect and Absurd Claims by "Reformers"—Irrational Fear of Marriage in Young Women Due to Sensationalized Exaggerations—Research by a Female Psychologist Shows the Damaging Effects of Exaggerated Claims—Facts About the Percentage of Men Affected by Sexually Transmitted Infections.

 
XXIII. Gonorrhea 158

Source of Gonorrhea—Mucous Membrane of Genital Organs and of Eye Principal Seats of Disease—Symptoms in Men and in Women—Vagina Seldom Attacked in Adults—Nobody Inherits Gonorrhea—Ophthalmia Neonatorum—Differences of Course of Disease in Men and Women—Gonorrhea Less Painful in Women—Symptoms not Suspected by Woman—Necessity for the Woman Consulting a Physician—Self-treatment When Woman Cannot Consult Physician—Formulæ for Injections.

Source of Gonorrhea—Mucous Membrane of Genital Organs and of Eye Main Locations of the Disease—Symptoms in Men and in Women—Vagina Rarely Affected in Adults—Gonorrhea is Not Hereditary—Ophthalmia Neonatorum—Differences in Disease Progression for Men and Women—Gonorrhea Typically Less Painful in Women—Symptoms Often Overlooked by Women—Importance of Women Consulting a Doctor—Self-Treatment When a Woman Cannot See a Doctor—Formulas for Injections.

 
XXIV. Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls 164

Former Causes of Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls—Discharge Chief Symptom—Evil Results of Vulvovaginitis—Psychic Results of Treatment—Effects in Hastening Sexual Maturity—Vulvovaginitis a Cause of Permanent Sterility—Measures to Prevent the Disease—Toilet Seats and Vulvovaginitis.

Former Causes of Vulvovaginitis in Young Girls—Discharge as the Main Symptom—Negative Consequences of Vulvovaginitis—Psychological Effects of Treatment—Impact on Accelerating Sexual Maturity—Vulvovaginitis as a Cause of Permanent Infertility—Prevention Measures—Toilet Seats and Vulvovaginitis.

 
XXV. Syphilis 168

Syphilis Due to Germ—Syphilis a Constitutional Disease—Primary Lesion—Incubation Period—Roseola—Primary Stage—Secondary Stage—Mucous Patches—Tertiary Stage—Gumma—Hereditary Nature of Syphilis—Milder Course in Women Than in Men—Obscure Symptoms in Syphilis—Necessity for Examination by Physician—Locomotor Ataxia—Softening of the Brain—Chancroids.

Syphilis Caused by Germs—Syphilis as a Systemic Disease—Initial Lesion—Incubation Period—Roseola—Primary Stage—Secondary Stage—Mucous Membrane Lesions—Tertiary Stage—Gumma—Genetic Aspect of Syphilis—Less Severe Progression in Women Compared to Men—Unclear Symptoms in Syphilis—Importance of Medical Examination—Locomotor Ataxia—Brain Softening—Chancroids.

 
XXVI. The Curability of Venereal Disease 174[13]

Gonorrhea May Be Practically Cured in Every Case in Man—Extensive Gonorrheal Infection in Woman Difficult to Cure—Positive Cure in Syphilis Impossible to Guarantee.

Gonorrhea can usually be cured in men—widespread gonorrheal infection in women is hard to treat—completely curing syphilis cannot be guaranteed.

 
XXVII. Venereal Prophylaxis 177

Necessity for Douching Before and After Suspicious Intercourse—Formulæ for Douches—Precautions Against Non-venereal Sources of Infection—Syphilis Transmitted by Dentist's Instruments—Manicurists and Syphilis—Promiscuous Kissing a Source of Syphilitic Infection.

Necessity for Douching Before and After Suspicious Intercourse—Formulas for Douches—Precautions Against Non-venereal Sources of Infection—Syphilis Transmitted by Dentist's Instruments—Manicurists and Syphilis—Promiscuous Kissing a Source of Syphilitic Infection.

 
XXIII. Alcohol, Sex and Venereal Disease 181

Alcoholic Indulgence and Venereal Disease—A Champagne Dinner and Syphilis—Percentage of Cases of Venereal Infection Due to Alcohol—Artificial Stimulation of Sex Instinct in Man and in Woman—Reckless Sexual Indulgence Due to Alcohol—Alcohol as an Aid to Seduction.

Alcohol and Sexually Transmitted Infections—A Champagne Dinner and Syphilis—Percentage of Venereal Infections Caused by Alcohol—Artificial Stimulation of Sexual Desire in Men and Women—Irresponsible Sexual Behavior Caused by Alcohol—Alcohol as a Tool for Seduction.

 
XXIX. Marriage and Gonorrhea 187

Decision of Physician Regarding Marriage of Patients Infected with Gonorrhea or Syphilis—Advisability of Certificate of Freedom from Transmissible Disease—Premarital Examination as a Universal Custom—When a Man Who Had Gonorrhea May Be Allowed to Marry—When a Woman Who Had Gonorrhea May be Allowed to Marry—Antisepsis Before Coitus—Question of Sterility in the Man Who Has Had Gonorrhea Easily Answered—Impossibility of Determining Whether the Woman is Fertile or Not.

Decision of Doctor Regarding Marriage of Patients Infected with Gonorrhea or Syphilis—Importance of Certificate of Freedom from Transmissible Disease—Premarital Examination as a Common Practice—When a Man Who Had Gonorrhea May Be Allowed to Get Married—When a Woman Who Had Gonorrhea May Be Allowed to Get Married—Hygiene Before Intercourse—Question of Sterility in a Man Who Has Had Gonorrhea Easily Answered—Inability to Determine Whether a Woman is Fertile or Not.

 
XXX. Marriage and Syphilis 195

Rules for Permitting a Syphilitic Patient to Marry—Rules More Severe in Cases Where Children Are Desired—Where Both Partners Are Syphilitic—Danger of Paresis in Some Syphilitic Patients—A Case in the Author's Practice.

Rules for Allowing a Syphilis Patient to Marry—Stricter Rules If Children Are Wanted—When Both Partners Have Syphilis—Risk of Paresis in Certain Syphilis Patients—A Case from the Author's Experience.

 
XXXI. Who May and Who May Not Marry 200

The Physician Often Consulted as to Advisability of Marriage—Venereal Disease the Most Common Question—Tuberculosis—Sexual Appetite of Tubercular Patients—[14]Effect of Pregnancy Contraceptive Knowledge for Tubercular Wife—Heart Disease—Serious Bar to Marriage—Influence of Sexual Intercourse—Cancer—Fear of Hereditary Transmission—Exophthalmic Goiter—Most Frequent in Women—Simple Goiter—Exceptions to Rule—Obesity—Family History—Obesity and Stoutness Not Synonymous—Arteriosclerosis—Danger in Sexual Act—Gout—Real Causes of Gout—Mumps—Parotid Glands and Sex Organs—Mumps and Sterility—Oöphoritis Due to Mumps—Hemophilia—Hemophilic Sons May Marry—Hemophilic Daughters May Not Marry—AnemiaChlorosisEpilepsy—Hysteria—Symptoms of Hysteria—Marriage of Hysterical Women—Alcoholism—Effect on Offspring—Alcoholics and Impotence—Feeblemindedness—Evil Effects on Offspring—Sterilization of Feebleminded Only Preventive—Insanity—Functional Insanity—Organic Insanity—Hereditary Transmissibility of Insanity—Fear Resulting in Insanity—Environment versus Heredity in Insanity—NeurosisNeurastheniaPsychastheniaNeuropathyPsychopathy—Nervous Conditions and Genius—Sexual Impotence and Genius—Drug Addiction—External Causes—Consanguineous Marriages—When Consanguineous Marriages are Advisable—Offspring of Consanguineous Marriages—Homosexuality—Homosexuals Often Ignorant of Their Condition—Sexual Repression and Homosexuality—Sadism and Divorce—Masochism—Sexual Impotence and Marriage—Effect Upon the Wife—Frigidity—Marital Relations and Frigid Woman—Excessive Libido and Marriage—Excessive Demands Upon Wife—Satyriasis—The Excessively Libidinous Wife—Nymphomania—Treatment—Harelip—Myopia—Astigmatism—Premature Baldness—Criminality—Crime as Result of Environment—Legal and Moral Crime—Ancestral Criminality and Marriage—Rules of Heredity—Pauperism—Difference Between Pauperism and Poverty.

The Physician Frequently Asked About the Suitability of Marriage—Venereal Disease as the Most Common Concern—Tuberculosis—Sexual Drive in Tubercular Patients—[14]Impact of Pregnancy and Contraceptive Knowledge for Tubercular Wives—Heart Disease—A Serious Obstacle to Marriage—Effects of Sexual Activity—Cancer—Worries About Hereditary Risk—Exophthalmic Goiter—Most Common in Women—Simple Goiter—Exceptions to the Rule—Obesity—Family History—Obesity and Being Overweight Are Not the Same—Arteriosclerosis—Risks Involved in Sexual Activity—Gout—Underlying Causes of Gout—Mumps—Relation of Parotid Glands to Sex Organs—Mumps and Sterility—Oöphoritis Caused by Mumps—Hemophilia—Hemophilic Sons Can Marry—Hemophilic Daughters Cannot Marry—AnemiaChlorosisEpilepsy—Hysteria—Signs of Hysteria—Marriage of Hysterical Women—Alcoholism—Impact on Children—Alcoholics and Impotence—Feeblemindedness—Negative Effects on Offspring—Sterilization of Feebleminded Individuals as the Only Preventive Measure—Insanity—Functional Insanity—Organic Insanity—Hereditary Nature of Insanity—Fear Leading to Insanity—Environment vs. Heredity in Insanity—NeurosisNeurastheniaPsychastheniaNeuropathyPsychopathy—Nervous Disorders and Genius—Sexual Impotence and Genius—Drug Addiction—External Factors—Consanguineous Marriages—When Consanguineous Marriages Are Advisable—Children of Consanguineous Marriages—Homosexuality—Homosexuals Often Unaware of Their Condition—Sexual Repression and Homosexuality—Sadism and Divorce—Masochism—Sexual Impotence and Marriage—Impact on the Wife—Frigidity—Marital Relations Involving a Frigid Woman—Excessive Libido and Marriage—Excessive Demands on the Wife—Satyriasis—The Highly Libidinous Wife—Nymphomania—Treatment—Harelip—Myopia—Astigmatism—Premature Baldness—Criminal Behavior—Crime as a Result of Environment—Legal and Moral Crime—Ancestral Criminality and Marriage—Principles of Heredity—Pauperism—Distinction Between Pauperism and Poverty.

 
XXXII. Birth Control Or the Limitation of Offspring 244

Knowledge of Prevention of Conception Essential—Misapprehensions Concerning Birth-control Propaganda—Modern Contraceptives Not Injurious to Health—Imperfection of Contraceptive Measures Due to Secrecy—Prevention of Conception and Abortion Radically Different—More Marriages Consummated if Birth-control Information were Legally Obtainable—Demand for Prostitution Would be Curtailed—Venereal Disease Due to Lack of [15]Knowledge—Another Phase of the Birth-control Problem—Knowledge of Contraceptive Methods Where There Was a Taint of Insanity, and the Happy Results.

Knowledge of Preventing Conception Essential—Misunderstandings About Birth Control Misinformation—Modern Contraceptives Are Not Harmful to Health—Flaws in Contraceptive Methods Due to Secrecy—Preventing Conception and Abortion Are Totally Different—More Marriages Would Happen if Birth Control Information Were Legally Accessible—Demand for Prostitution Would Decrease—Sexually Transmitted Diseases Caused by Lack of [15]Knowledge—Another Aspect of the Birth Control Issue—Understanding Contraceptive Methods Where There Was a History of Mental Illness, and the Positive Outcomes.

 
XXXIII. Advice To Girls Approaching the Threshold of Womanhood 261

The Irresistible Attraction of the Young Girl for the Male—The Unprotected Girl's Temptations—Some Men Who Will Pester the Young Girl—Risk of Venereal Infection—Danger of Impregnation—Use of Contraceptives by the Unmarried Woman May Not Always Be Relied Upon—Nature of Men who Seduce Girls—Exceptions—Illegitimate Motherhood—Difficulties in the Way of Illegitimate Mother Who Must Earn Her Living—The Child of the Foundling Asylum—Social Attitude Towards Illegitimacy Responsible for Abortion Evil—Dangers of Abortion—The Girl Who Has Lost Her Virginity.

The Irresistible Attraction of the Young Girl for the Male—The Unprotected Girl's Temptations—Some Men Who Will Harass the Young Girl—Risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections—Danger of Pregnancy—Unmarried Women's Use of Birth Control May Not Always Be Dependable—Nature of Men Who Lure Girls—Exceptions—Single Parenthood—Challenges for a Single Mother Who Needs to Support Herself—Child from the Orphanage—Society's Attitude Towards Illegitimacy Contributes to the Abortion Issue—Risks of Abortion—The Girl Who Has Lost Her Virginity.

 
XXXIV. Advice To Parents of Unfortunate Girls 273

Attitude of Parents Towards Unfortunate Girl—The Case of Edith and What Her Father Did—The Pitiful Cases of Mary B. and Bridget C.

Attitude of Parents Towards Unfortunate Girl—The Case of Edith and What Her Father Did—The Pitiful Cases of Mary B. and Bridget C.

 
XXXV. Sexual Relations During Menstruation 279

Heightened Sexual Appetite of Many Women During Menstruation—Sexual Intercourse During Menstrual Period—When Intercourse May be Permitted—Injection Before Coitus During Menstruation—Fallacy of Ancient Idea of Injuriousness.

Heightened sexual desire in many women during menstruation—sexual intercourse during the menstrual period—when intercourse may be allowed—precautions before intercourse during menstruation—debunking the ancient belief of harm.

 
XXXVI. Sexual Intercourse During Pregnancy 282

Complete Abstinence During Pregnancy—Bad Results of Complete Abstinence—Intensity of Relations During First Four Months—Intercourse During Fifth, Sixth and Seventh Months—Intercourse During Eighth and Ninth Months—Abstinence After Birth of Child.

Complete Abstinence During Pregnancy—Negative Effects of Complete Abstinence—Intensity of Relationships During the First Four Months—Intercourse During the Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh Months—Intercourse During the Eighth and Ninth Months—Abstinence After the Birth of the Child.

 
XXXVII. Sexual Intercourse for Propagation Only 284

Belief in Sexual Intercourse for Propagation Only—What Such Practice Would Lead to—Nature and the Sex-fanatics—Sexual Desire in Woman After Menopause—Sex Instinct of Sterile Men and Women—Sex Instinct Has Other High Purposes.

Belief in Sexual Intercourse for Reproduction Only—What Such Practice Would Lead To—Nature and the Sex Fanatics—Sexual Desire in Women After Menopause—Sex Instinct of Infertile Men and Women—Sex Instinct Has Other Important Purposes.

 
XXXVIII. Vaginismus 288[16]

Vaginismus—Dyspareunia—Difference Between Vaginismus and Dyspareunia—Adherent Clitoris a Cause of Masturbation and Convulsions.

Vaginismus—Dyspareunia—Difference Between Vaginismus and Dyspareunia—Adherent Clitoris as a Cause of Masturbation and Convulsions.

 
XXXIX. Sterility 291

Definition of Sterility—Husband Should First be Examined—One-child Sterility—The Fertile Woman—Salpingitis as a Cause of Sterility—Leucorrhea and Sterility—Displacement of Uterus and Sterility—Closure of Neck of Womb and Sterility—Sterility and Constitutional Disease—Treatment of Sterility.

Definition of Sterility—Husband Should First be Examined—One-child Sterility—The Fertile Woman—Salpingitis as a Cause of Sterility—Leucorrhea and Sterility—Displacement of Uterus and Sterility—Closure of Neck of Womb and Sterility—Sterility and Constitutional Disease—Treatment of Sterility.

 
XL. The Hymen 294

Difference Between Chastity and Virginity—Worship of Intact Hymen—Sacrificing Hymen Sometimes Essential for Health of the Girl—Certificate from Physician who has Ruptured Hymen.

Difference Between Chastity and Virginity—Worship of Intact Hymen—Sometimes, Breaking the Hymen is Necessary for the Girl's Health—Certificate from a Doctor Who Has Ruptured the Hymen.

 
XLI. Is the Orgasm Necessary for Impregnation? 297

Suppression of Orgasm by Woman to Prevent Impregnation—Bad Results of Suppression by the Woman—Orgasm: Relation of to Impregnation—A Hypothesis—A Fanciful Hypothesis—Why Passionate Women Frequently Fail to Become Mothers—Advice to Passionate Women who Desire to Conceive.

Suppression of Orgasm by Women to Prevent Pregnancy—Negative Outcomes of Suppression by Women—Orgasm: Connection to Pregnancy—A Theory—An Imaginative Theory—Why Passionate Women Often Struggle to Become Mothers—Recommendations for Passionate Women who Want to Get Pregnant.

 
XLII. Frigidity in Women 301

Meaning of Term Frigidity—Types of Frigidity—Large Percentage of Frigid Women—Repression of Sexual Manifestations and Frigidity—Frigidity and Masturbation—Frigidity and Sexual Weakness of Husband—Frigidity and Dislike of Husband—Organic Causes of Frigidity—A Frigid Woman May Become Passionate—Treatment of Frigidity.

Meaning of the Term Frigidity—Types of Frigidity—High Percentage of Frigid Women—Repression of Sexual Expressions and Frigidity—Frigidity and Masturbation—Frigidity and Husband's Sexual Weakness—Frigidity and Dislike of Husband—Physical Causes of Frigidity—A Frigid Woman Can Become Passionate—Treatment for Frigidity.

 
XLIII. Advice to Frigid Women, Particularly Wives 304

Advice to Frigid Women—Attitude of Different Men Towards Frigid Wives—Orgasm a Subjective Feeling—A Justifiable Innocent Deception—The Case of a Demi-Mondaine.

Advice to Cold Women—How Different Men Feel About Cold Wives—Orgasm is a Personal Experience—A Justifiable Innocent Deception—The Story of a Demi-Mondaine.

 
XLIV. Rape 308[17]

Definition of Rape—Age of Consent—Unanimous Opinion of Experts—Exceptional Cases—False Accusation of Rape Due to Perversion—Erotic Dreams Under Anesthesia Causing Accusations Against Doctors and Dentists.

Definition of Rape—Age of Consent—Unanimous Opinion of Experts—Exceptional Cases—False Accusation of Rape Due to Perversion—Erotic Dreams Under Anesthesia Causing Accusations Against Doctors and Dentists.

 
XLV. The Single Standard of Sexual Morality 311

Chastity—Double Standard of Morality—Attempt to Abolish Double Standard—Late Marriages and Chastity in Men—Harmful Advice Given to Young Women—Chastity in Men Not Always Due to Moral Principles—Chaste Men and Satisfactory Husbands—A Statement by Professor Freud—A Statement by Professor Michels—What a Girl has a Right to Demand of Her Future Husband—Three Cases Showing Disastrous Effects of Wrong Teachings.

Chastity—Double Standards in Morality—Efforts to End Double Standards—Late Marriages and Men's Chastity—Harmful Advice Given to Young Women—Men's Chastity Not Always Based on Moral Values—Chaste Men and Good Husbands—A Statement from Professor Freud—A Statement from Professor Michels—What a Girl Should Expect from Her Future Husband—Three Examples Demonstrating the Damaging Effects of Misguided Teachings.

 
XLVI. Difference Between Man's and Woman's Sex and Love Life 318

Seemingly Contradictory Statements—Faulty Interpretations of Words Sexual Instinct and Love—Difference in Manifestations of Male and Female Sexual Instincts—Man's Sex Instinct Grosser Than Woman's—Awakening of Sexual Desire in the Boy and in the Girl—Woman's Desire for Caresses—Man's Main Desire for Sexual Relations—Normal Sex Relations as Means of Holding a Man—A Physiological Reason Why Man is Held—Man and Physical Love—Woman and Spiritual Love—Preliminaries of Sexual Intercourse in Men and Women—Physical Attributes—Mental and Spiritual Qualities—Difference Between Love and "Being in Love"—Love as a Stimulus to Man—When the Man Loves—When the Woman Loves—Man's More Engrossing Interests—Lovemaking Irksome to Man—Man's Polygamous Tendencies—Woman Single-affectioned in Her Sex and Love Life—Man and Woman Biologically Different.

Seemingly Contradictory Statements—Faulty Interpretations of Words Sexual Instinct and Love—Difference in Manifestations of Male and Female Sexual Instincts—Man's Sex Instinct Coarser Than Woman's—Awakening of Sexual Desire in the Boy and in the Girl—Woman's Desire for Affection—Man's Primary Desire for Sexual Relationships—Normal Sexual Relationships as a Way to Keep a Man—A Physiological Reason Why a Man is Attached—Man and Physical Love—Woman and Emotional Love—Preliminaries of Sexual Intercourse in Men and Women—Physical Attributes—Mental and Emotional Qualities—Difference Between Love and "Being in Love"—Love as a Motivation for Man—When the Man Loves—When the Woman Loves—Man's More Engrossing Interests—Lovemaking Annoying to Man—Man's Polygamous Tendencies—Woman Monogamous in Her Sexual and Love Life—Man and Woman Biologically Different.

 
XLVII. Maternal Impressions 327

Wide-spread Belief in Maternal Impressions—No Single Well-authenticated Case of Maternal Impression—Birth of Monstrosities—Ridiculous Examples Given by Physicians—So-called Shock Often a Product of Mother's Imagination—Four Cases of Alleged Maternal Impressions—Mother's Health During Pregnancy May Have Effect Upon Child's General Health.

Wide-spread Belief in Maternal Impressions—No Single Well-Documented Case of Maternal Impression—Birth of Abnormalities—Absurd Examples Provided by Physicians—So-called Shock Often a Result of Mother's Imagination—Four Cases of Claimed Maternal Impressions—Mother's Health During Pregnancy May Affect Child's Overall Health.

 
XLVIII. Advice to the Married and Those About to Be 336[18]

Marriage as an Ideal Institution—Monogamic Marriage—Some Reasons for Husbands' Deviations—Importance of First Few Weeks of Married Life—Necessity for Understanding at Beginning—Preventing and Breaking Habits—The Wife's Individuality—Husbands Who are Childish, Not Vicious—Wife's Interest in Husband's Affairs—The "Slob" Husband—The Well-groomed Husband—Bad Odor from the Mouth—Odors from Other Parts of the Body—Treatment for Bad Odor from Perspiration—A Beneficial Powder—Advice Regarding Flirting—Dainty Underwear—Fine External Clothes and Cheap and Soiled Underwear—Delicate Adjustments of Sex Act Required with Some Men—Wife Who Discusses Her Husband's Foibles—A Professional Secret—A Case of Temporary Impotence—The Wife's Indiscretion—The Disastrous Result—A Big Stomach—The Wife's Attitude Towards the Marital Relation—Behavior Preliminary to and During the Act—Congenital Frigidity—Prudish and Vicious Ideas About the Sex Act—Sexual Intercourse for Procreative Purposes Only—Fear of Pregnancy on the Part of the Wife—The Remedy—Other Causes—Wife who Makes too Frequent Demands—Sacrificing the Future to the Present—Esthetic Considerations.

Marriage as an Ideal Institution—Monogamous Marriage—Some Reasons for Husbands' Deviations—Importance of the First Few Weeks of Married Life—Need for Understanding at the Start—Breaking and Preventing Habits—The Wife's Individuality—Childish Husbands, Not Vicious—Wife's Interest in Her Husband's Affairs—The "Slob" Husband—The Well-Groomed Husband—Bad Breath—Odors from Other Parts of the Body—Treatment for Bad Body Odor—A Helpful Powder—Advice About Flirting—Dainty Lingerie—Nice Clothes and Cheap, Dirty Underwear—Delicate Adjustments of the Sexual Act Required with Some Men—Wife Who Talks About Her Husband's Quirks—A Professional Secret—A Case of Temporary Impotence—The Wife's Lack of Discretion—The Disastrous Outcome—A Big Belly—The Wife's Attitude Towards the Marital Relationship—Behavior Before and During the Act—Congenital Frigidity—Prudish and Vicious Ideas About Sexual Intercourse—Sex for Procreation Only—Wife's Fear of Pregnancy—The Solution—Other Causes—Wife Who Makes Too Many Demands—Sacrificing the Future for the Present—Aesthetic Considerations.

 
XLXIX. A Rational Divorce System 356

A Rational Divorce System—Storms and Squalls—Two Sides of the Divorce Question—Outside Help and Marital Tangles—A Husband who was a Paragon of Virtue—The Case of the Sweet Wife—The Proper Untangling of Domestic Tangles.

A Rational Divorce System—Storms and Squalls—Two Perspectives on Divorce—External Support and Relationship Issues—A Husband Who Was Perfect—The Situation of the Lovely Wife—The Right Way to Resolve Domestic Conflicts.

 
L. What Is Love? 361

Is Love Definable?—Raising a Corner of the Veil—Two Opinions of Love—The First Opinion: Sexual Intercourse and Love—The Second Opinion—The Grain of Truth in Each—The Truth Concerning Love—Foundation of Love—Sexual Attraction and Love—The Frigid Woman and Her Husband—Puzzling Cases of Love—The Paradox—Blindness of Love and the Penetrating Vision of Love—Limits of Homeliness—Physical Aversion and Genesis of Love—Mating in the Animal Kingdom—Mating in Low Races—Love in People of High Culture—Difference in Love of Savage and Man of Culture—Distinctions Between Loves—Varieties of Love and Varieties of Men—"Love" Without Sexual Desire—Refraining and Wanting—Cause of Love [19]at First Sight—"Magnetic Forces" and Love at First Sight—The Pathological Side—Differentiation of Phases of Love—Infatuation—Difference Between "Infatuation" and "Being in Love"—Sexual Satisfaction and Infatuation—Sexual Satisfaction and Love—Infatuation Mistaken for Love—Love the Most Mysterious of Human Emotions—Great Love and Supreme Happiness.

Is Love Definable?—Lifting a Corner of the Veil—Two Views of Love—The First View: Sexual Intercourse and Love—The Second View—The Grain of Truth in Each—The Reality of Love—Foundation of Love—Sexual Attraction and Love—The Cold Woman and Her Husband—Confusing Cases of Love—The Paradox—The Blindness of Love and Its Keen Insight—Limits of Homeliness—Physical Aversion and the Origin of Love—Mating in the Animal Kingdom—Mating in Lower Races—Love Among Cultured People—Differences in the Love of Savages and Cultured Individuals—Distinctions Between Different Loves—Varieties of Love and Types of People—"Love" Without Sexual Desire—Restraint and Wanting—The Cause of Love at First Sight—"Magnetic Forces" and Love at First Sight—The Pathological Aspect—Differentiating Phases of Love—Infatuation—Difference Between "Infatuation" and "Being in Love"—Sexual Satisfaction and Infatuation—Sexual Satisfaction and Love—Confusing Infatuation with Love—Love as the Most Mysterious Human Emotion—Great Love and Ultimate Happiness.

 
LI. Jealousy and How to Combat It 375

Jealousy the Most Painful of Human Emotions—Impairment of Health—Mental Havoc—Jealousy as a Primitive Emotion—Jealousy in the Advanced Thinker and in the Savage—Jealousy in the Child—Feelings and Environmental Factors—Essential Factors—Vanity—Anger—Pain—Envy—The Impotent Husband's Jealousy—Anti-social Qualities—The Jealous and the Unfaithful Husband—Means of Eradicating the Evil—Iwan Bloch on the Question—Prof. Robert Michels' Statement—Remark of Prof. Von Ehrenfels—Havelock Ellis on Variation in Sexual Relationships—Advanced Ideas—Woman as Man's Chattel—The Change and the Changer—Teaching the Children—Casting Epithets at Jealousy—Free Unions and Jealousy—Feelings, Actions and Public Opinion—The Adulterous Wife of the Present Day—Jealousy Defeating Its Own Object—Jealousy of Inanimate Objects.

Jealousy: The Most Painful Human Emotion—Impact on Health—Mental Disturbance—Jealousy as a Basic Emotion—Jealousy in Advanced Thinkers and in Primitives—Jealousy in Children—Feelings and Environmental Influences—Key Factors—Vanity—Anger—Pain—Envy—The Helpless Husband's Jealousy—Anti-social Traits—The Jealous and Unfaithful Husband—Ways to Eliminate the Problem—Iwan Bloch on the Topic—Prof. Robert Michels' Insights—Comment by Prof. Von Ehrenfels—Havelock Ellis on Changes in Sexual Relationships—Progressive Ideas—Women as Men's Property—The Change and the One Who Changes—Educating the Kids—Slandering Jealousy—Open Relationships and Jealousy—Feelings, Actions, and Public Perception—The Adulterous Wife Today—Jealousy Working Against Its Own Intent—Jealousy Toward Inanimate Objects.

 
LII. Remedies for Jealousy 395

Prevention and Cure—Prophylaxis of Jealousy—Fitting Remedy to Circumstances—The Neglectful and Flirtatious Husband—No Question of Love—Advice to the Wife of the Flirtatious Man—An Efficient Though Vulgar Remedy—Jealousy Must Be Experienced to Be Understood—Necessity for Freedom of Association—Lines of Conduct for the Wife—Contempt for a Certain Type of Wife and Husband—The Abandoned Lover—The Effects of Unrequited Love—Sublimated Sexual Desire—Replacing Unrequited Love—The Attitude of Goethe—Simultaneous Loves Possible—Successive Loves Possible—Eternal Loves—When Sex Relationships May Be Beneficial—Purchasable Sex Relations and Their Value—The Broken Engagement—The Terrible Effects on the Young Man—The Young Streetwalker—Sex Relations with Fiancé—Inundating Sense of Shame—Collapse—Attempts at Suicide—An Active Sex Life—The Results—The Prevention of Jealousy.

Prevention and Cure—Preventing Jealousy—The Right Solution for the Situation—The Neglectful and Flirtatious Husband—Love Is Not the Issue—Advice for Wives of Flirtatious Men—An Effective but Crude Solution—You Have to Feel Jealousy to Understand It—Importance of Freedom to Socialize—Guidelines for the Wife—Disdain for Certain Types of Wives and Husbands—The Jilted Lover—The Impact of Unreturned Love—Transformed Sexual Desire—Filling the Void of Unreturned Love—Goethe’s Perspective—Simultaneous Relationships Are Possible—Sequential Relationships Are Possible—Enduring Love—When Sexual Relationships Can Be Positive—Buying Sexual Relationships and Their Worth—The Broken Engagement—The Severe Effects on the Young Man—The Young Streetwalker—Sexual Relationships with a Fiancé—Overwhelming Feelings of Shame—Breakdown—Suicide Attempts—An Active Sexual Life—The Effects—Preventing Jealousy.

 
LIII. Concluding Words 409









WOMAN: HER SEX AND LOVE LIFE







WOMAN: HER SEX AND LOVE LIFE


Chapter OneToC

THE PARAMOUNT NEED OF SEX KNOWLEDGE FOR GIRLS AND WOMEN

Why Sex Knowledge is of Paramount Importance to Girls and Women—Reasons Why a Misstep in a Girl Has More Serious Consequences than a Misstep in a Boy—The Place Love Occupies in Woman's Life—Woman's Physical Disabilities.

Why Sexual Knowledge is Extremely Important for Girls and Women—Reasons Why a Mistake by a Girl Has More Serious Consequences than a Mistake by a Boy—The Role Love Plays in a Woman's Life—Women's Physical Challenges.


All are agreed—I mean all who are capable of thinking and have given the subject some thought—that for the welfare of the race and for his own physical and mental welfare it is important that the boy be given some sex instruction. All are not agreed as to the character of the instruction, its extent, the age at which it should be begun and as to who the teacher should be—the father, the family physician, the school teacher or a specially prepared book—but as to the necessity of sex knowledge for the boy there is now substantial agreement—among the conservatives as well as among the radicals.

Everyone agrees—I mean everyone who can think and has considered the issue—that for the well-being of society and for his own physical and mental health, it’s important for a boy to receive some sex education. However, there isn't consensus on the nature of that education, how extensive it should be, the appropriate age to start, or who should be the teacher—whether it should be the father, the family doctor, the school teacher, or a dedicated book—but there is strong agreement on the need for boys to have this knowledge, among both conservatives and progressives.

No such agreement exists concerning sex [26]knowledge for the girl. Many still are the men and women—and not among the conservatives only—who are strongly opposed to girls receiving any instruction in sex matters. Some say that such instruction—except a few hygienic rules about menstruation—is unnecessary, because the sex instinct awakens in girls comparatively late, and it is time enough for them to learn about such matters after they are married. Others fear that sex knowledge would destroy the mystery and romance of sex, and would rob our maidens of their greatest charms—modesty and innocence. Still others fear that sex instruction would tend to awaken the sex instinct in our girls prematurely; would direct their thoughts to matters about which they would not think otherwise; and they argue that the warnings about venereal disease, prostitution, etc., which are an integral part of sex instruction, tend to create a cynical, inimical attitude towards the male sex, which may even result in hypochondriac ideas and antagonism to marriage.

No such agreement exists regarding sex knowledge for girls. Many men and women— not just conservatives—strongly oppose teaching girls anything about sex. Some believe that except for a few health tips about menstruation, this education is unnecessary because girls usually develop a sexual instinct later, and they can learn about these matters after marriage. Others worry that knowing about sex would ruin its mystery and romance, taking away from what makes young women appealing—modesty and innocence. Still, others are concerned that sex education would awaken sexual feelings in girls too soon, leading them to think about things they wouldn’t normally consider. They argue that discussions about sexually transmitted diseases, prostitution, and so on, which are part of sex education, might foster a cynical, negative view of men, potentially resulting in anxiety about health and hostility toward marriage.

I do not deny that there is a grain of truth in all the above objections. Sex instruction does cause some girls to think of sex matters earlier than they otherwise would, and some girls have been made bitter and hypochondriac, and disgusted with the male sex. But it would not be difficult to demonstrate [27]that it was not sex instruction per se that was responsible for these deplorable results; it was the wrong kind of instruction that was to blame—it was the wrong emphasis, the lurid exaggerations that caused the mischief, and not the truth. In other words, it is not sex information, it is sex misinformation, that is pernicious. And, of course, to this everybody will agree: rather than false information, better no information at all.

I won’t deny that there’s some truth to all the objections mentioned above. Sex education does make some girls think about sex earlier than they might have otherwise, and it has made some girls bitter, anxious, and disgusted with guys. But it wouldn’t be hard to show [27] that it wasn’t sex education itself that caused these unfortunate outcomes; it was the wrong type of education to blame—it was the misguided focus and exaggerated claims that created the problems, not the actual facts. In other words, it’s not sex education that’s harmful, but sex misinformation. And, of course, everyone would agree: it’s better to have no information at all than to have false information.

But if the information to be imparted be sane, honest and truthful, without exaggerating the evils and without laying undue emphasis on the dark shadows of our sex life, then the results can be only beneficent. And the task I have put before myself in this book is to give our girls and women sane, square and honest information about their sex organs and sex nature, information absolutely free from luridness, on the one hand, and maudlin sentimentality, on the other. The female sex is in need of such information, much more so than is the male sex. Yes, if boys, as is now universally agreed, are in need of sex instruction, then girls are much more in need of it. Why? For several important reasons.

But if the information being shared is reasonable, honest, and truthful, without exaggerating the negatives or placing too much focus on the darker aspects of our sex lives, then the outcome can only be positive. The goal I've set for myself in this book is to provide our girls and women with straightforward, honest information about their bodies and sexual nature, information that is completely free from sensationalism on one side and overly sentimental emotion on the other. Women need this information much more than men do. Yes, if we all agree that boys need sex education, then girls need it even more. Why? For several important reasons.

The first reason why sex instruction is even more important for girls than it is for boys is because a misstep in a girl has much more disastrous consequences than it has in a boy. The disastrous [28]results of a misstep in a boy are only physical in character; the results of the same misstep in a girl may be physical, moral, social and economic. To speak more plainly. If a boy, through ignorance, rashly indulges in illicit sexual relations, the worst consequence to him may be infection with a venereal disease. But he is not considered immoral, he is not despised, he is not ostracized, he does not lose his social standing in the slightest degree, and when he is cured of his venereal disease he has no difficulty in getting married. He does not even have to conceal his past sexual history from his wife. But if a girl makes a misstep the consequences to her are terrible indeed; it may not only cost her her health and social standing, she may have to pay with her very life. She runs the risk of venereal infection the same as the boy does, but in addition she runs the risk of becoming pregnant, which in our present social system is a catastrophe indeed. To save herself from the disgrace of an illegitimate child she may have an abortion produced; the abortion may have no bad results, but it may, if performed bunglingly, leave her an invalid for life, or it may kill her outright. If she is so unfortunate as to be unable to get anybody to produce an abortion, she gives birth to an illegitimate child, which she is forced in most cases to put away in an institution of some sort [29]where she hopes and prays it may die soon—and, in general, it does. If it does not die, she has for the rest of her life a Damocles' sword hanging over her head, and she is in constant terror lest her sin be found out. She does not permit herself to look for a mate, but if she does get married, the specter of her antematrimonial experience is constantly before her eyes. After years and years of married life, the husband may divorce her if he finds out that she had "sinned" before she knew him. And unless the husband is a broad-minded man and loves her truly and unless she made a clean breast of everything to him before marriage, her life is continuous torture. But even if the girl escaped pregnancy, the mere finding out that she had an illicit experience deprives her of social standing, or makes her a social outcast and entirely destroys or greatly minimizes her chances of ever marrying and establishing a home of her own. She must remain a lonely wanderer to the end of her days.

The first reason why sex education is even more crucial for girls than for boys is that a mistake made by a girl can lead to far more serious consequences than for a boy. The negative outcomes for a boy’s mistake are primarily physical; however, the consequences of the **same** mistake for a girl can be physical, moral, social, and economic. To put it simply, if a boy, out of ignorance, engages in casual sexual encounters, the worst he might face is contracting a sexually transmitted infection. Yet, he isn’t seen as immoral, isn’t shamed, isn’t ostracized, and doesn’t lose his social standing. Once he’s treated for the infection, he can get married without issues and doesn’t need to hide his sexual history from his wife. On the other hand, if a girl makes a mistake, the consequences can be devastating. It may not only affect her health and social status but could also endanger her life. She faces the same risk of infection as a boy, but additionally, she risks becoming pregnant, which is a true disaster in our current social climate. To avoid the shame of an unplanned pregnancy, she might seek an abortion; while it could go smoothly, a botched procedure could leave her with lifelong health issues or even result in her death. If she is unlucky enough to not find anyone to help her with an abortion, she will give birth to an illegitimate child, which she often has to place in an institution where she hopes it will die soon—and it typically does. If it survives, she has a constant cloud of fear hanging over her, worrying that her past will be discovered. She won’t allow herself to look for a partner, but if she does marry, the memory of her past always lingers. After many years of marriage, her husband might divorce her if he learns that she "sinned" before they met. Unless he is understanding and truly loves her, and she confesses everything before they marry, her life becomes endless torment. Even if the girl avoids pregnancy, discovering that she had a casual sexual encounter can strip her of social standing, turning her into a social pariah and significantly reducing her chances of ever marrying and having her own family. She may end up as a solitary wanderer for the rest of her life.

The enormous difference in the results of a misstep in a boy and a girl is clearly seen, and for this reason alone, if for no other, sex instruction is of more importance to the girl than it is to the boy.

The huge difference in the outcomes of a mistake made by a boy versus a girl is easy to see, and for this reason alone, if for no other, sex education is more important for the girl than it is for the boy.

But there are other important reasons, and one of them is beautifully and truthfully expressed by Byron in his two well-known lines.

But there are other important reasons, and one of them is beautifully and truthfully articulated by Byron in his two famous lines.

A man's love is a separate part of his life,
[30] It's a woman's whole existence.

Yes, love is a woman's whole life.

Yes, love is a woman's entire life.

Some modern women might object to this. They might say that this was true of the woman of the past, who was excluded from all other avenues of human activity. The woman of the present day has other interests besides those of Love. But I claim that this is true of only a small percentage of women; and in even this small minority of women, social, scientific and artistic activities cannot take the place of love; no matter how busy and successful these women may be, they will tell you if you enjoy their confidence that they are unhappy, if their love life is unsatisfactory. Nothing, nothing can fill the void made by the lack of love. The various activities may help to cover up the void, to protect it from strange eyes, they cannot fill it. For essentially woman is made for love. Not exclusively, but essentially, and a woman who has had no love in her life has been a failure. The few exceptions that may be mentioned only emphasize the rule.

Some modern women might disagree with this. They might argue that this applied to women in the past, who were shut out from many areas of life. Today’s women have interests beyond just love. However, I maintain that this applies to only a small percentage of women; and even within this small group, social, scientific, and artistic pursuits can’t replace love. No matter how busy or successful these women may appear, they will confess, if you’ve gained their trust, that they are unhappy if their love life is lacking. Nothing can fill the emptiness that comes from not having love. Various activities might help to mask that emptiness and keep it hidden from others, but they can’t truly fill it. At the core, women are meant for love. Not exclusively, but fundamentally, and a woman who has never experienced love in her life has missed out. The few exceptions simply highlight the general truth.

But not only psychically is a woman's love and sex life more important than a man's, physically she is also much more cognizant of her sex and much more hampered by the manifestation of her sex [31]nature than man is. To take but one function, menstruation. From the age 13 or 14 to the age of forty-five or fifty it is a monthly reminder to woman that she is a woman, that she is a creature of sex; and, while to many women this periodically recurring function is only a source of some annoyance or discomfort, to a great number it is a cause of pain, headache, suffering, or complete disability. Man has no such phenomenon to annoy him practically his whole life.

But emotionally, a woman's love and sex life is more significant than a man's, and physically, she is much more aware of her sexuality and much more affected by its expressions than he is. Take menstruation as an example. From around age 13 or 14 to about 45 or 50, it serves as a monthly reminder to women that they are women, that they are sexual beings; and while many women experience this recurring event as merely an annoyance or discomfort, for many others, it brings pain, headaches, suffering, or even complete disability. Men do not experience any similar phenomenon that disrupts their lives almost their entire lives. [31]

But more important are the results of love-union, of sex relations. A man after a sexual relation is just as free as he was before. A woman, if the relation has resulted in a pregnancy, which is generally the case, unless special pains are taken it should not so result, has nine troublesome months before her, months of discomfort if not of actual suffering; she then has an extremely trying and painful ordeal, that of childbirth, and then there is another trying period, the period of lactation or of nursing and of bringing up the baby. The penalty seems almost too great.

But what matters more is the outcome of love and sexual relationships. A man after sex is just as free as he was before. A woman, however, if the encounter leads to pregnancy—which often happens unless precautions are taken—faces nine challenging months ahead, months filled with discomfort and sometimes pain. After that, she goes through the extremely difficult and painful experience of childbirth, followed by another tough phase: nursing and caring for the baby. The consequences seem almost too severe.

And when the woman is on the point of ceasing to menstruate she does not do so smoothly and comfortably. She has to go through a period called the menopause, which may last one or two years and which may bring discomforts and dangers of its [32]own. Man does not have to go through such a distinct period of demarcation separating his sexual from his non-sexual life. Altogether it cannot be denied that woman is much more a slave of her sex nature than man is of his. Yes, Nature has handicapped woman much more heavily than she has man.

And when a woman is about to stop menstruating, it doesn’t happen smoothly or comfortably. She goes through a phase called menopause, which can last one to two years and may bring its own discomforts and risks. A man doesn’t have a clear period of transition separating his sexual life from his non-sexual life. Ultimately, it’s undeniable that a woman is much more affected by her biological nature than a man is by his. Yes, nature has placed greater challenges on women than on men.

In short, both in view of the fact that sexual ignorance with its possible missteps has much more disastrous consequences for the girl than it has for the boy, and in view of the fact that the sex instinct and its physical and psychic manifestations occupy a much more important part in woman's life than they do in the life of man, we consider the necessity of sex instruction much greater in the case of woman than in the case of man. I do not wish to be misunderstood as underestimating the need of sex instruction for the male—only I consider the need even greater in the case of the female.

In short, since a lack of sexual knowledge can lead to far worse consequences for girls than for boys, and since the sexual instinct and its physical and emotional expressions play a much bigger role in a woman's life than in a man's, we believe that the need for sexual education is much greater for women than for men. I don't want to be misunderstood as downplaying the importance of sexual education for males—it's just that I think the need is even more critical for females.







Chapter TwoToC

THE FEMALE SEX ORGANS: THEIR ANATOMY

The Internal Sex Organs—The Ovaries—The Fallopian Tubes—The Uterus—The Divisions of the Uterus—Anteversion, Anteflexion, Retroversion, Retroflexion, of the Uterus—Endometritis—The Vagina—The Hymen—Imperforate Hymen—The External Genitals—The Vulva, Labia Majora, Labia Minora, the Mons Veneris, the Clitoris, the Urethra—The Breasts—The Pelvis—The Difference Between the Male and Female Pelvis.

The Internal Sex Organs—The Ovaries—The Fallopian Tubes—The Uterus—The Parts of the Uterus—Anteversion, Anteflexion, Retroversion, Retroflexion of the Uterus—Endometritis—The Vagina—The Hymen—Imperforate Hymen—The External Genitals—The Vulva, Labia Majora, Labia Minora, the Mons Veneris, the Clitoris, the Urethra—The Breasts—The Pelvis—The Differences Between the Male and Female Pelvis.


The organs which primarily distinguish one sex from the other are the sex organs. It is by the aid of the sex organs that children are begotten and brought into the world, that the race is reproduced and perpetuated. It is for this reason that the sex organs are also called the Reproductive Organs.

The organs that mainly differentiate one sex from the other are the sex organs. It is through these sex organs that children are conceived and brought into the world, and that the human race is reproduced and continued. For this reason, sex organs are also referred to as the Reproductive Organs.

The first thing we must do is to become familiar with the structure and location of the sex organs; in other words, we must get a fair idea of their Anatomy.

The first thing we need to do is become familiar with the structure and location of the sex organs; in other words, we must get a good understanding of their Anatomy.

The female sex organs, also called the reproductive or generative organs, are divided into internal and external. The internal are the most important and consist of: the ovaries, Fallopian tubes, uterus [34]or womb, and vagina. The external sex organs of the female are: the vulva, hymen, and clitoris. Among the external organs are also generally included the mons Veneris and the breasts or mammary glands.

The female reproductive organs, also known as the generative organs, are divided into internal and external categories. The internal organs are the most significant and include: the ovaries, Fallopian tubes, uterus [34] (or womb), and vagina. The external female sex organs include: the vulva, hymen, and clitoris. The mons Veneris and the breasts, or mammary glands, are also typically considered part of the external organs.



SUBCHAPTER A

THE INTERNAL SEX ORGANS

The Ovaries. The ovaries are the essential organs of reproduction. For it is they that generate the eggs, or ova, or ovules, which, after becoming fertilized or fecundated by the spermatozoa of the male, develop into children. Without the ovaries of the female, the same as without the testicles of the male (to which they correspond), no children could be begotten, and the entire human race would quickly disappear from our planet. The ovaries are two in number; they are embedded in the broad ligaments [35]which support the womb in the pelvis, one on each side of the womb. They are of a grayish or whitish pink color, and are about an inch and a half long, three-quarters of an inch wide, and one-third of an inch thick. They weigh from one-eighth to one-quarter of an ounce. Their surface is either smooth or rough and puckered. Think of a large blanched almond and you will have a pretty fair idea of the size and shape of an ovary.

The Ovaries. The ovaries are the key reproductive organs. They produce the eggs, or ova, which, after being fertilized by the male's sperm, develop into children. Without the ovaries in females, just like without males' testicles (which correspond to them), no children could be born, and the human race would soon vanish from the Earth. There are two ovaries, located in the broad ligaments [35] that support the uterus in the pelvis, with one on each side. They are grayish or whitish pink, about an inch and a half long, three-quarters of an inch wide, and one-third of an inch thick. They weigh between one-eighth and one-quarter of an ounce. Their surface can be smooth or rough and puckered. If you imagine a large blanched almond, you'll get a good idea of the size and shape of an ovary.

Ovary.

Ovary.

Ovary.

The Fallopian Tubes. The Fallopian tubes (so called from Fallopius, a great anatomist, who discovered them; also called oviducts: egg conductors, because they conduct the eggs from the ovary into the uterus) are two very thin tubes, extending one from each upper angle of the womb to the ovaries; but at their ovarian end they expand into a fringed and trumpet-shaped extremity. The fringes are referred to as fimbria. They are about five inches long and only about one-sixteenth of an inch in diameter; the function of the tubes is to catch the ova as they burst forth from the ovaries and to convey them to the uterus. Taking into consideration the very narrow lumen, or caliber, of the Fallopian tubes, it is easy to understand why even a very slight inflammation is apt to clog them up, to seal their mouths or openings, thus rendering the woman sterile, or incapable of having children. For, if the Fallopian [36]tubes are "clogged" up, the eggs, or ova, have no way of reaching the uterus.

The Fallopian Tubes. The Fallopian tubes (named after Fallopius, a renowned anatomist who discovered them; also known as oviducts or egg conductors because they transport eggs from the ovaries to the uterus) are two very thin tubes, extending from each upper corner of the womb to the ovaries; at their ovarian end, they widen into a fringed, trumpet-shaped opening. The fringes are called fimbria. They are about five inches long and only about one-sixteenth of an inch wide; the tubes' function is to catch the ova as they are released from the ovaries and to carry them to the uterus. Given the very narrow lumen or caliber of the Fallopian tubes, it's easy to see why even a minor inflammation can block them, sealing their openings and making the woman sterile or unable to have children. If the Fallopian [36]tubes are "clogged," the eggs or ova cannot reach the uterus.

The Greek name for the Fallopian tube is salpinx (salpinx in Greek means tube). An inflammation of the Fallopian tube is therefore called salpingitis. (A salpingitis has the same effect in causing sterility in the female as has an epididymitis in the male.) Salpingectomy is the cutting away of the whole or of a piece of the Fallopian tube (corresponds to vasectomy in the male).

The Greek word for the Fallopian tube is "salpinx" (which means "tube" in Greek). So, inflammation of the Fallopian tube is called salpingitis. (Salpingitis can cause sterility in females, just like epididymitis can cause it in males.) Salpingectomy refers to the removal of all or part of the Fallopian tube (similar to a vasectomy in males).

Womb.

1. Openings into the Fallopian Tubes. 2. Mouth of the Womb.

1. Openings into the Fallopian Tubes. 2. Entrance of the Uterus.

The Uterus. The uterus or womb is the organ in which the fertilized ovum, or egg, grows and develops into a child. It is a hollow muscular organ, about the size of a pear, with thick walls, capable under the influence of pregnancy of great expansion and growth. The broad part of the pear is called the body of the uterus; the lower narrow part is called the neck of the uterus, or cervix. The uterus in the adult girl or woman is about three inches long, two inches broad in its upper part and nearly an inch thick. It weighs from an ounce to an ounce and a half. When the uterus is in a pregnant condition, it increases enormously, both in size and in weight, as we will see in a future chapter. The cavity of the uterus is somewhat triangular in shape; at each upper angle is the small opening communicating with the Fallopian tube; the upper portion of [37]the uterus is called the fundus; the external opening of the womb, situated in the center of the cervix, is called the mouth of the womb, or the os, or external os.

The Uterus. The uterus, or womb, is the organ where a fertilized egg grows and develops into a child. It is a hollow muscular organ, roughly the size of a pear, with thick walls that can expand significantly during pregnancy. The broader part of the pear is known as the body of the uterus, while the narrower lower part is called the neck of the uterus, or cervix. In an adult girl or woman, the uterus is about three inches long, two inches wide at its upper part, and nearly an inch thick. It weighs between one ounce and one and a half ounces. When pregnant, the uterus expands greatly in both size and weight, as we will explore in a future chapter. The cavity of the uterus has a somewhat triangular shape; at each upper angle, there is a small opening that connects to the Fallopian tube. The upper part of [37]the uterus is called the fundus; the external opening of the womb, located in the center of the cervix, is referred to as the mouth of the womb, or the os, or external os.

The uterus is situated in the center of the pelvis, between the bladder and the rectum. It is supported by certain ligaments, the chief of which are the broad ligaments; but, on account of general weakness, too hard physical labor, or lifting heavy weights, the ligaments may stretch, and the uterus may sink down low in the vagina, and we then have the condition known as prolapse of the womb. Or, the womb may turn forward, when we have a condition of anteversion. If the womb is bent (or flexed) forward on itself the condition is called anteflexion. If the womb is turned backwards, the condition is called retroversion; if it is bent or flexed backward upon itself the condition is called retroflexion. An extreme degree of anteversion or anteflexion, or retroversion or retroflexion, may interfere with impregnation, as the spermatozoa may find it difficult or impossible to reach the opening of the womb—the external os.

The uterus is located in the center of the pelvis, between the bladder and the rectum. It is supported by various ligaments, primarily the broad ligaments; however, due to overall weakness, excessive physical labor, or heavy lifting, these ligaments can stretch, causing the uterus to descend low into the vagina, resulting in a condition known as prolapse of the womb. Alternatively, the womb may tilt forward, leading to a condition called anteversion. If the womb is bent (or flexed) forward on itself, this is referred to as anteflexion. If the womb is tilted backward, the condition is called retroversion; if it is bent or flexed backward upon itself, this is known as retroflexion. An extreme degree of anteversion or anteflexion, or retroversion or retroflexion, can hinder conception, as sperm may have difficulty or be unable to reach the opening of the womb—the external os.

[39]The entire cavity of the uterus is lined by a mucous membrane;[1] this mucous membrane is called the endometrium (endo—within; metra—uterus). An inflammation of the endometrium is called endometritis. It is the endometrium that is principally concerned in menstruation—that is, it is from it that the monthly discharge of blood comes.

[39]The entire cavity of the uterus is lined with a mucous membrane;[1] this mucous membrane is called the endometrium (endo—within; metra—uterus). Inflammation of the endometrium is called endometritis. The endometrium plays a key role in menstruation—it's the source of the monthly discharge of blood.

The Vagina [vagina in Latin—a sheath]. The vagina is the tube or canal which serves as a passage-way between the uterus and the outside of the body. It extends from the external genitals or vulva to the neck of the womb, embracing the latter for some distance. It is a strong, fibromuscular canal, lined with mucous membrane. It is not smooth inside, but arranged in folds, or rugæ, so that when necessary, as during childbirth, it can stretch enormously and permit the passage of a child's head. The length of the vaginal canal is between three and five inches, but it is in general much more capacious in women that have borne one or more children than in those who have not borne any.

The Vagina [vagina in Latin—a sheath]. The vagina is the tube or canal that acts as a pathway between the uterus and the outside of the body. It extends from the external genitals or vulva to the cervix, surrounding it for a distance. It is a strong, fibromuscular canal, lined with mucus membrane. The inside isn’t smooth; it has folds, or rugæ, allowing it to stretch significantly when needed, such as during childbirth, to let a baby’s head pass through. The length of the vaginal canal is usually between three and five inches, but it tends to be more spacious in women who have given birth compared to those who haven’t.

Near the vaginal entrance are situated two small glands; they are about the size of a pea, and secrete mucus. They are called Bartholin's glands; occasionally they become inflamed and give a good deal of trouble.

Near the vaginal entrance are two small glands; they are about the size of a pea and produce mucus. They are known as Bartholin's glands; sometimes they can become inflamed and cause quite a bit of discomfort.

[40]
Anteversion of the Uterus

Anteversion of the Uterus.

Uterine anteversion.

Anteflexion of the Uterus

Anteflexion of the Uterus.

Uterine anteflexion.

Retroversion of the Uterus

Retroversion of the Uterus.

Retroverted Uterus.

Retroflexion of the Uterus

Retroflexion of the Uterus.

Retroverted Uterus.

[41]The Hymen [hymen in Greek—a membrane]. The external opening of the vagina, in virgins, that is, in girls or women who have not had sexual intercourse, is almost entirely closed by a membrane called the hymen. The vulgar name for hymen is "maidenhead." The hymen may be of various shapes, and of different consistency. In some girls it is a very thin membrane, which tears very readily; in others it is quite tough. On the upper margin or in the center of the hymen there is an opening which permits any secretion from the vagina and the blood from the uterus to come through. In rare cases there is no opening in the hymen, that is, the vagina is entirely closed. Such a hymen is called imperforate (not perforated). When the girl begins to menstruate, the blood cannot come out and it accumulates in the vagina. In such cases the hymen must be opened or slit by a doctor. In some cases the hymen is congenitally absent; that is, the girl is born without any hymen. While the hymen is usually ruptured during the first intercourse, it, in some cases, being elastic and stretchable, persists untorn after sexual intercourse. It will therefore be seen that just as the presence of the hymen is no absolute proof of [42]virginity, so is the absence of the hymen no absolute proof that the girl has had sexual relations, She might have been born without any hymen, or it might have been ruptured by vaginal examination, by a vaginal douche, by scratching to relieve itching, or by some accident.

[41]The Hymen [hymen in Greek—a membrane]. The external opening of the vagina in virgins, which refers to girls or women who haven’t had sexual intercourse, is mostly covered by a membrane called the hymen. The common term for hymen is "maidenhead." The hymen can come in various shapes and different thicknesses. In some girls, it is a very thin membrane that tears easily; in others, it is quite tough. There is an opening at the upper edge or in the center of the hymen that allows vaginal secretions and menstrual blood to pass through. In rare cases, there is no opening in the hymen, meaning the vagina is completely closed. This type of hymen is known as imperforate (not perforated). When a girl starts menstruating, blood cannot exit, leading to an accumulation in the vagina. In these instances, a doctor must open or slit the hymen. Sometimes, the hymen is absent from birth, meaning the girl is born without one. While the hymen typically breaks during the first sexual intercourse, it can, in some cases, be elastic and stretchable, remaining intact after intercourse. Thus, the presence of the hymen is not definitive proof of [42] virginity, just as its absence doesn’t confirm that a girl has had sexual relations. She may have been born without a hymen, or it may have been ruptured due to a vaginal examination, a vaginal douche, scratching to relieve itching, or some other accident.

The remains of the hymen after it is ruptured shrink and form little elevations which can be easily felt; they are known as caruncles. [In Latin, carunculæ myrtiformes, which means in English myrtleberry-shaped caruncles; caruncle is a small fleshy elevation; derived from caro, which in Latin means flesh.]

The remnants of the hymen after it breaks shrink and create small bumps that can be easily felt; these are called caruncles. [In Latin, carunculæ myrtiformes, which translates to myrtleberry-shaped caruncles in English; a caruncle is a small fleshy bump; it comes from caro, which means flesh in Latin.]



SUBCHAPTER B

THE EXTERNAL GENITALS

The Vulva. The external genitals of the female are called the vulva. The vulva consists of the labia majora (meaning the larger lips), which are on the outside and which in the grown-up girl are covered with hair, and the labia minora (the smaller lips), which are on the inside and which are usually only seen when the labia majora are taken apart.

The Vulva. The external female genitals are called the vulva. The vulva includes the labia majora (meaning the larger lips), which are on the outside and typically covered with hair in adult females, and the labia minora (the smaller lips), which are on the inside and usually only visible when the labia majora are spread apart.

[Vulva in Latin means folding-door. The ancients Were fond of giving fancy names to things.]

[Vulva in Latin means folding door. The ancients liked to give things fancy names.]

The Mons Veneris. The elevation above the vulva, [43]which during puberty becomes covered with hair, is called by the fanciful name, mons Veneris, or Venus' mountain. It is usually well padded with fatty tissue.

The Mons Veneris. The area above the vulva, [43]which becomes hairy during puberty, is referred to by the whimsical name, mons Veneris, or Venus' mountain. It is typically cushioned with fatty tissue.

The Clitoris. The clitoris is a small body about an inch in length, situated beneath the mons Veneris and partly or entirely covered by the upper borders of the labia minora.

The Clitoris. The clitoris is a small structure about an inch long, located beneath the mons Veneris and partially or fully covered by the upper edges of the labia minora.

The Urethra. Between the clitoris above and the opening of the vagina below is situated the opening of the urethra, or the urinary meatus, through which the urine passes. Many women are so ignorant, or, let us say innocent, that they think the urine passes out through the vagina. This is not so. The vagina has nothing to do with the process of urination.

The Urethra. Located between the clitoris above and the opening of the vagina below is the opening of the urethra, or urinary meatus, where urine exits the body. Many women are unaware, or we could say innocent, in believing that urine flows out through the vagina. This is not the case. The vagina is not involved in the process of urination.

Again enumerating the female sex organs, but in the reverse order, from before backward, or from out inward, we have: The mons Veneris and the labia majora, or the external lips of the vulva; these are the plainly visible parts of the female genital organs. When the labia majora are taken apart we see the labia minora; when the labia majora and minora are taken apart we can see or feel the clitoris and the hymen, or the remains of the hymen. We then have the vagina, a large, stretchable musculo-membranous canal, in the upper portion of which the neck of the womb, or the cervix, can be seen [44](when a speculum is used), or felt by the finger. Only the cervix, or neck of the womb, can be seen, but the rest of the womb, the broader portion, can be easily felt and examined by one hand in the vagina and the other hand over the abdomen. Continuous with the uterus are the Fallopian tubes, and below the trumpet-shaped ends of the Fallopian tubes are the ovaries, embedded in the broad ligaments, one on each side.

Again listing the female sex organs, but this time in reverse order, from back to front or from outside to inside, we have: the mons pubis and the labia majora, or the outer lips of the vulva; these are the clearly visible parts of the female genital organs. When the labia majora are separated, we see the labia minora; when the labia majora and minora are pulled apart, we can see or feel the clitoris and the hymen, or what remains of the hymen. Next, we have the vagina, a large, stretchy muscular membrane, where the neck of the womb, or cervix, can be seen [44] (when a speculum is used), or felt by touch. Only the cervix, or neck of the womb, can be seen, but the rest of the womb, the wider part, can be easily felt and examined with one hand inside the vagina and the other hand on the abdomen. Connected to the uterus are the Fallopian tubes, and below the funnel-shaped ends of the Fallopian tubes are the ovaries, located in the broad ligaments, one on each side.

The Breasts. The breasts, also called mammary glands, or mammæ [mamma in Latin, breast], may be considered as accessory organs of reproduction. They are of no importance in the male, in whom they are usually rudimentary, but they are of great importance in the female. They manufacture milk, which is necessary for the proper nutrition of the infant, and they add a great deal to the beauty and attractiveness of the woman. They are thus a help to the woman in getting a mate or a husband. The projecting elevation of the breast, which the child takes in his mouth when nursing, is called the nipple; the darker colored area surrounding the nipple is called the areola.

The Breasts. The breasts, also known as mammary glands, or mammæ [mamma in Latin, breast], can be seen as accessory organs of reproduction. They aren’t important in males, where they are usually underdeveloped, but they play a significant role in females. They produce milk, which is essential for the proper nutrition of infants, and they add greatly to a woman's beauty and attractiveness. This makes them a supportive factor for women in finding a mate or husband. The raised part of the breast that the baby sucks on while nursing is called the nipple; the darker area surrounding the nipple is known as the areola.


The Pelvis of the Male.

The Pelvis of the Male.

The Male Pelvis.

The Pelvis of the Female.

The Pelvis of the Female.

The Female Pelvis.



SUBCHAPTER C

THE PELVIS

The internal sex organs are situated in the lower part of the abdominal cavity, the part that is called the pelvis, or pelvic cavity. The meaning of the word pelvis in Latin is basin. The pelvis, also referred to as the pelvic girdle or pelvic arch, forms a bony basin, and is composed of three powerful bones: the sacrum, consisting of five vertebræ fused together and constituting the solid part of the spine, or vertebral column, in the back, and the two hipbones, one on each side. The two hipbones meet in front, forming the pubic arch.

The internal sex organs are located in the lower part of the abdominal cavity, known as the pelvis, or pelvic cavity. The term pelvis comes from Latin and means basin. The pelvis, also called the pelvic girdle or pelvic arch, forms a bony basin and is made up of three strong bones: the sacrum, which is made up of five fused vertebrae and forms the solid part of the spine, or vertebral column, at the back, and the two hipbones, one on each side. The two hipbones come together in front to form the pubic arch.

The hipbones are called in Latin the ossa innominata (nameless bones) and each hipbone is composed of three bones: the ilium, the ischium, and the os pubis. The thighs are attached to the hipbones, and to the hipbones are also attached the large gluteal muscles, which form the buttocks, or the "seat."

The hipbones are called ossa innominata in Latin (nameless bones), and each hipbone is made up of three bones: the ilium, the ischium, and the os pubis. The thighs connect to the hipbones, and the large gluteal muscles that make up the buttocks, or the "seat," are also attached to the hipbones.

The pelvis of the female differs considerably from the pelvis of the male. The female pelvis is shallower and wider, less massive, the margins of the bones are more widely separated, thus giving greater prominence to the hips; the sacrum is shorter and less curved, and the pubic arch is wider and more [48]rounded. All this is necessary in order to permit the child's head to pass through. If the female pelvis were exactly like the male pelvis, a full-term living child could never pass through it. The two illustrations show the differences between the male and female pelvis very clearly.

The female pelvis is quite different from the male pelvis. It's shallower and wider, less heavy, and the bone margins are more spaced apart, making the hips look more prominent. The sacrum is shorter and less curved, and the pubic arch is wider and more rounded. This design is essential for allowing the baby's head to pass through. If the female pelvis were the same as the male pelvis, a full-term baby couldn’t get through. The two illustrations clearly show the differences between the male and female pelvis.

Note particularly the differences in the pubic arches: in the male pelvis it is really more of an angle than an arch. Also note how much longer and more solid the sacrum (with its attached bone, called the coccyx[2]) is in the male pelvis. The differences in the pelves (the plural of pelvis is pelves) of the male and female become fully marked at puberty, but they are present as early as the fourth month of intra-uterine life.

Note especially the differences in the pubic arches: in the male pelvis, it's more of an angle than an arch. Also, observe how much longer and sturdier the sacrum (with its attached bone, called the coccyx[2]) is in the male pelvis. The differences in the pelves (the plural of pelvis is pelves) of males and females become fully pronounced at puberty, but they can be seen as early as the fourth month of intrauterine life.




FOOTNOTES:

[1] Mucous membrane—briefly a membrane which secretes mucus or some other fluid.

[1] Mucous membrane—a membrane that produces mucus or another type of fluid.

[2] The coccyx consists of three rudimentary vertebræ; it is the vestige of an organ which we once possessed in common with many other animals, namely—a tail.

[2] The coccyx is made up of three small vertebrae; it is a remnant of an organ that we used to share with many other animals, specifically—a tail.







Chapter ThreeToC

THE PHYSIOLOGY OF THE FEMALE SEX ORGANS

Function of the Ovaries—Internal Secretion of the Ovaries—Function of the Internal Secretion—Number of Ova in the Ovaries—The Graafian Follicles—Ovulation—Corpora Lutea—Function of the Fallopian Tubes—Function of the Vagina—Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris and Mons Veneris—Function of the Breasts—Besides Secreting Milk Breast Has Sexual Function—The Orgasm—Pollutions in Women—Secondary Sex Characters—Differences Between Woman and Man.

Function of the Ovaries—Internal Secretion of the Ovaries—Function of the Internal Secretion—Number of Ova in the Ovaries—The Graafian Follicles—Ovulation—Corpora Lutea—Function of the Fallopian Tubes—Function of the Vagina—Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris, and Mons Veneris—Function of the Breasts—In addition to producing Milk, the Breasts have a Sexual Function—The Orgasm—Uncontrolled Releases in Women—Secondary Sexual Characteristics—Differences Between Women and Men.


The importance of an organ depends upon its function, upon what it does, and not so much upon what it is. It is important to know the size, structure and location of an organ, but it is still more important to know its function; in other words, for our purpose it is more important to know the physiology than the anatomy of the sex organs.

The importance of an organ depends on its function, on what it does, and not so much on what it is. It’s important to know the size, structure, and location of an organ, but it’s even more crucial to understand its function; in other words, for our purpose, knowing the physiology of the sex organs is more important than knowing their anatomy.



SUBCHAPTER A

FUNCTION OF THE OVARIES

Like the testicles in man, so the ovaries in woman are the essential sexual organs. They are the fundamental organs, without which the other sexual [50]organs are useless. Also like the testicles in man, the ovaries have two distinct functions, manufacturing two distinct substances. One function is to manufacture eggs; this, called the oögenetic or egg-producing function, is its racial function; without it the race could not perpetuate itself. But the ovary has also an individual function. Besides the ova, the ovary manufactures what we call an internal secretion which is absorbed by the blood, and which is of the greatest importance to the woman herself. While the manufacture of ova begins only at puberty, with menstruation, and closes at the menopause, the manufacture of the internal secretion lasts throughout the woman's entire life. This secretion, which consists of various chemical substances, has a tremendous influence not only on the development of the woman's body, but also on her feelings.

Like the testicles in men, the ovaries in women are the essential sexual organs. They are the primary organs, without which the other sexual [50]organs are ineffective. Just like the testicles in men, the ovaries have two distinct functions, producing two different substances. One function is to produce eggs; this is called the oögenetic or egg-producing function, and it’s crucial for the continuation of the species. However, the ovary also has an individual function. In addition to the eggs, the ovary produces what we refer to as an internal secretion that is absorbed by the bloodstream and is extremely important for the woman herself. While the production of eggs starts at puberty with menstruation and ends at menopause, the production of this internal secretion continues throughout a woman's entire life. This secretion, which consists of various chemical substances, greatly influences not only the development of a woman's body but also her emotions.

First of all it is necessary for the development of the woman's special characteristics, or secondary sexual characters. Without that internal secretion of the ovaries, a woman would look more or less like a man; she would not develop her beautiful rounded form, her pretty long hair, her breasts, her broad pelvis, her feminine voice, etc. Second, the secretion is necessary to the proper development of her other sexual organs; if the ovaries are cut [51]out, then the uterus and the vagina and even the vulva shrivel up. Third, it is that internal secretion that excites in woman sexual desire and makes her enjoy relations with the male sex. If the ovaries are cut away, particularly if it is done early in life, the woman has no sexual desire and no enjoyment. Fourth, it contributes to the general health, wellbeing, energy, and mental alertness of the woman.

First of all, it's important for the development of a woman's unique traits, or secondary sexual characteristics. Without the hormones produced by the ovaries, a woman would resemble a man in many ways; she wouldn't develop her attractive curves, her long hair, her breasts, her wide hips, her feminine voice, and so on. Second, these hormones are essential for the proper development of her other sexual organs; if the ovaries are removed [51], then the uterus, vagina, and even the vulva will shrink. Third, it's these hormones that stimulate sexual desire in women and enhance their enjoyment of relationships with men. If the ovaries are removed, especially at a young age, the woman lacks sexual desire and pleasure. Fourth, they also contribute to a woman's overall health, well-being, energy, and mental sharpness.

You see the importance of the internal ovarian secretion, and you will readily understand why, when the ovaries are removed by operation, the woman, particularly if she is young, undergoes such marked changes. It is because we recognize now the great importance of the ovaries that we always, when operating on diseased ovaries leave at least a small piece of ovary, if at all possible.

You can see how important the internal ovarian secretion is, and you'll easily grasp why, when the ovaries are surgically removed, a woman, especially if she's young, experiences such significant changes. We now understand the crucial role of the ovaries, which is why, when performing surgery on diseased ovaries, we always try to leave at least a small portion of the ovary if at all possible.

Number of Ova. When the female infant is born, her ovaries contain as many ova or eggs as they ever will contain. In fact, they contain more than they will at puberty. For it is estimated that at birth each ovary contains about 100,000 ova; the majority of these, however, disappear so that at the age of puberty each ovary contains only about 30,000 ova. As only one ovum ripens each month from the time of puberty to the time of the menopause (i.e., about 300 to 400 ova at the utmost during [52]a lifetime), and as only a dozen or two ova would be necessary for the propagation of the race, it seems a superabundance of ova, an unnecessary lavishness. But nature is lavish where the propagation of the species is concerned. A portion of an ovary or of both ovaries might become diseased, and thousands of ova might become unfit for fertilization; nature therefore puts in an extra reserve supply. We see a still more striking example of this extreme extravagant lavishness in man; only one spermatozoön is necessary to impregnate the ovum, and only one spermatozoön can penetrate the ovum; nevertheless each normal ejaculation of semen contains between a quarter and half a million spermatozoa.

Number of Ova. When a baby girl is born, her ovaries have all the eggs they'll ever have. In fact, she has more than she'll have at puberty. It's estimated that each ovary contains about 100,000 eggs at birth; however, most of these will disappear, so by the time she reaches puberty, each ovary will have only about 30,000 eggs left. Since only one egg matures each month from puberty until menopause (which is around 300 to 400 eggs total in a lifetime), and only about a dozen or so eggs would be needed for species propagation, it seems excessive to have so many eggs, almost wasteful. But nature is generous when it comes to ensuring the survival of the species. Parts of an ovary or both ovaries could become diseased, and many eggs could become unsuitable for fertilization; therefore, nature provides a surplus. We see an even clearer example of this extravagance in men; only one sperm is needed to fertilize an egg, and only one sperm can enter the egg; yet, each normal ejaculation contains between a quarter and half a million sperm.

The Graafian Follicles. Each primitive or primordial ovum[3] is imbedded in a little vesicle or follicle, which is generally known as Graafian follicle, and there are as many Graafian follicles as there are ova. (The Graafian follicles were first described about 250 years ago—in 1672—by a Delft physician named De Graaf, hence the name.) Until puberty, that is the commencement of menstruation, the Graafian follicles with the oöcytes or primitive [53]ova are in a more or less dormant condition. But with the onset of puberty there commences a period of intense activity in the ovaries. This period of activity is repeated regularly once a month, and it constitutes the process of ovulation and menstruation. The two processes are closely though not causally connected. Ovulation consists in the monthly maturation and extrusion of a ripe ovum; menstruation, which will be further discussed in a separate chapter, consists in the monthly discharge of blood, mixed with mucus from the inside lining of the uterus. Every twenty-eight days, from the [54]time of puberty to the time of the menopause, a Graafian follicle bursts and an ovum is extruded from the ovary. Before the follicle bursts, it swells and enlarges and reaches the surface of the ovary; the whole follicle is congested with blood, but at one point near the surface of the ovary it is pale and thin, and here the rupture takes place.

The Graafian Follicles. Each primitive or primordial ovum[3] is embedded in a small vesicle or follicle, commonly known as a Graafian follicle, and there are as many Graafian follicles as there are ova. (The Graafian follicles were first described about 250 years ago—in 1672—by a physician from Delft named De Graaf, which is where the name comes from.) Until puberty, which marks the beginning of menstruation, the Graafian follicles containing the oöcytes or primitive [53]ova are in a relatively dormant state. However, with the onset of puberty, there starts a period of intense activity in the ovaries. This active cycle occurs roughly once a month and involves the processes of ovulation and menstruation. These two processes are closely linked, but not causally connected. Ovulation refers to the monthly maturation and release of a mature ovum; menstruation, which will be further discussed in a separate chapter, involves the monthly discharge of blood mixed with mucus from the inner lining of the uterus. Every twenty-eight days, from the [54]start of puberty until menopause, a Graafian follicle breaks open and releases an ovum from the ovary. Before this rupture, the follicle swells and enlarges, reaching the surface of the ovary. The entire follicle becomes engorged with blood, but at one point near the surface, it appears pale and thin, which is where the rupture occurs.

Section of Ovary.

Section of Ovary.
1. Graafian follicle in the earliest stage.
2, 3, 4. Follicles in more advanced stages.
5, 7. Almost mature follicle.
6. Follicle from which the ovum has escaped.
8. Corpus luteum.

Ovary section.
1. Graafian follicle in the earliest stage.
2, 3, 4. Follicles in more advanced stages.
5, 7. Nearly mature follicle.
6. Follicle from which the egg has escaped.
8. Corpus luteum.

Corpora Lutea. After the Graafian follicle has burst and the ovum has been pushed out, the cavity that is left does not remain empty and functionless; there is a further process going on there; there is a growth of cells, of a yellowish color, and the follicle becomes filled with a yellowish body, which on account of its color is called the corpus luteum (plural—corpora lutea; luteum in Latin—yellow, corpus—body). This corpus luteum grows in size until it sometimes occupies as much as one-third of the ovary. But there is considerable difference between the corpora lutea of non-pregnant and pregnant women. Up to the end of about a month the corpora lutea are the same, but after that the corpus luteum of the non-pregnant woman begins to get smaller, to shrink, so that at the end of two or three months it is reduced to a small scar and later cannot be noticed at all. The corpus luteum of the pregnant woman keeps on increasing until the end of the second month, remains about the same size [55]until the end of the sixth month, and only then begins gradually to diminish. The corpus luteum of the non-pregnant woman, that is, the one following menstruation, is called false corpus luteum; the corpus luteum following pregnancy is called a true corpus luteum. The corpus luteum acts like a gland and elaborates a secretion which has an influence on the circulation in the uterus and on menstruation. It probably possesses other properties, with which we are not yet quite familiar. The corpora lutea of various animals are now prepared in powder or tablet form and used in medicine in the treatment of certain diseases of women.

Corpora Lutea. After the Graafian follicle has ruptured and the ovum has been released, the empty cavity doesn't stay inactive; there's an ongoing process occurring there. Cells, which are yellowish in color, start to grow, and the follicle fills with a yellow body known as the corpus luteum (plural—corpora lutea; luteum in Latin means yellow, corpus means body). This corpus luteum increases in size and can take up as much as one-third of the ovary. However, there are significant differences between the corpora lutea in non-pregnant and pregnant women. Until about the end of the first month, the corpora lutea appear similar, but after that, the corpus luteum in a non-pregnant woman begins to shrink, reducing to a small scar by two or three months later and eventually becomes unnoticeable. The corpus luteum in a pregnant woman continues to grow until the end of the second month, remains roughly the same size [55]until the end of the sixth month, and then it begins to gradually decrease. The corpus luteum present after menstruation in a non-pregnant woman is referred to as the false corpus luteum; the one following pregnancy is called the true corpus luteum. The corpus luteum functions like a gland, producing a secretion that affects blood flow in the uterus and influences menstruation. It likely has other properties that we still don’t fully understand. Corporal lutea from various animals are now processed into powder or tablet form and used in medicine to treat certain women's health issues.



SUBCHAPTER B

FUNCTION OF THE OTHER GENITAL ORGANS

Function of the Fallopian Tubes. The function of the Fallopian tubes or oviducts as they are sometimes called is to catch the ovum as it bursts through the ovary and to conduct it from the ovary into the uterus. It is while the ovum is in the narrow lumen of the tube that the spermatozoön which has travelled up from the uterus usually finds it, and it is in the tube, near its entrance to the womb, that impregnation usually takes place. After the ovum [56]is impregnated or fecundated, it slowly moves down to the uterus, where it attaches itself and remains and grows for nine months, until it is ready to come out and start an independent life.

Function of the Fallopian Tubes. The Fallopian tubes, also known as oviducts, are responsible for catching the egg as it leaves the ovary and transporting it from the ovary to the uterus. It's in the narrow opening of the tube that the sperm, which has traveled up from the uterus, typically encounters the egg, and near the entrance to the womb is where fertilization usually occurs. After the egg [56] is fertilized, it gradually moves to the uterus, where it implants and develops for nine months, until it is ready to be born and begin an independent life.

The uterus or womb is the house of the embryo almost from the moment of conception to the moment of birth. Within the thick warm sheltered walls of the uterus the child grows, develops, eats and breathes, until all its organs and functions have reached such a stage of perfection that it can live by itself and for itself. And this may be said to be the sole function of the uterus, or at least its sole useful function. For the other function of the uterus, menstruation, cannot be said to be a necessary or a useful function. It is a normal function because it occurs regularly in every healthy woman during her child-bearing period, but not every normal function is a necessary or useful function. Not everything that is is right or useful.

The uterus, or womb, is where the embryo develops from almost the moment of conception until birth. Inside the thick, warm, protective walls of the uterus, the child grows, develops, eats, and breathes until its organs and functions are well-formed enough for it to live independently. This can be seen as the primary purpose of the uterus, or at least its primary useful purpose. The other function of the uterus, menstruation, can't be considered necessary or particularly useful. It is a normal process that happens regularly in every healthy woman during her child-bearing years, but not every normal function is essential or beneficial. Just because something exists doesn’t mean it’s right or useful.

Function of the Vagina. The vagina is the canal in which sexual intercourse takes place. It receives the male organ (penis) during the sexual act, and serves as a temporary repository for the male semen. After the spermatozoa have reached the uterus, the vagina has no further function to perform.

Function of the Vagina. The vagina is the channel where sexual intercourse occurs. It accommodates the male organ (penis) during sex and acts as a temporary storage space for male semen. Once the sperm reaches the uterus, the vagina no longer has any other functions.

Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris, and Mons [57]Veneris. The vulva and the clitoris have no special functions to perform; but in them, in the clitoris particularly, but also in the labia minora, resides the feeling of voluptuousness, the pleasurable sensation experienced during the sexual act. Another seat of voluptuousness in the woman is located in the cervix of the uterus.

Functions of the Vulva, Clitoris, and Mons [57]Veneris. The vulva and the clitoris don't have specific functions to fulfill; however, they do play a key role in sexual pleasure, especially the clitoris, but also the labia minora. Another area related to pleasure in women is found in the cervix of the uterus.

The mons Veneris has no special physiological function to perform, but it as well as the vulva serve as strong points of attraction for the male sex. While the entire female body is attractive to the male, and vice versa, there are certain zones which are especially attractive or exciting. Such zones or areas are called erogenous zones—the word erogenous means love-generating. The vulva and the mons Veneris are the strongest erogenous zones; other erogenous zones are the lips, the breasts, etc.

The mons pubis doesn't have any specific physiological function, but it, along with the vulva, acts as a powerful point of attraction for males. While the entire female body can be appealing to males, and vice versa, there are certain areas that are particularly enticing or stimulating. These areas are known as erogenous zones—the term erogenous means love-inducing. The vulva and the mons pubis are the most intense erogenous zones; other erogenous zones include the lips, breasts, and so on.

Function of the Breasts. The function of the breasts is to nurse or suckle the young on the mother's milk until they are able to live on other food. The other name for breasts is mammary gland (in Latin, mamma—breast), and all animals who suckle their young are called mammals or mammalia. Besides its milk secreting function, the breasts constitute a strong erogenous zone; they are a point of strong attraction for the male sex, many men being more attracted by well-developed breasts than [58]by a pretty face. There is a good biological reason for this. Well developed breasts indicate that the other sexual organs are well developed and that the woman will make a satisfactory wife and satisfactory mother. Considering then the importance of the breasts in attracting a husband and their function in nursing the young, also their erogenous properties, it is perfectly proper to class them among the reproductive organs.

Function of the Breasts. The purpose of the breasts is to feed the young with the mother’s milk until they can eat other foods. Another term for breasts is mammary gland (in Latin, mamma—breast), and all animals that nurse their young are called mammals or mammalia. Besides producing milk, the breasts are also a highly sensitive area; they attract men significantly, with many men being more drawn to well-developed breasts than [58] to a pretty face. There is a solid biological reason for this. Well-developed breasts indicate that the other sexual organs are also well developed, suggesting the woman will be a good wife and mother. Considering the importance of breasts in attracting a partner, their role in nursing, and their sensitive nature, it makes sense to categorize them as reproductive organs.



SUBCHAPTER C

THE ORGASM

The culmination of the act of sexual intercourse is called the orgasm. It is the moment at which the pleasurable sensation is at its highest point, the body experiences a thrill, there is a spasmodic contraction in the genital organs, and there is a secretion of fluid from the genital glands and mucous membranes. This fluid in women is not a vital fluid like the semen in man; it is merely mucus, and in some women it is very slight in amount or altogether absent. Adult women who live without sexual relations occasionally have sexual or erotic dreams; that is, they dream that they are in the company of men, playing or having relations with [59]them. Such dreams are usually accompanied by an orgasm or an orgastic feeling, and by a discharge of mucus, the same as in sexual intercourse. Such a discharge of mucus during sleep is called an emission or pollution.

The peak of sexual intercourse is known as the orgasm. It's the moment when pleasure reaches its highest level, the body feels an intense rush, there are involuntary contractions in the genital area, and fluid is released from the genital glands and mucous membranes. This fluid in women isn't a vital fluid like semen in men; it’s simply mucus, and in some women, it may be very minimal or even absent. Adult women who are not sexually active sometimes have sexual or erotic dreams; in these dreams, they envision being with men, whether playing or engaging in intimate acts with [59] them. These dreams often result in an orgasmic sensation or feeling, along with a release of mucus, similar to what occurs during sexual intercourse. This release of mucus during sleep is referred to as an emission or pollution.

In the male sex pollutions play an important rôle (see the author's "Sex Knowledge for men"), because the semen is a vital fluid, and if it is lost too frequently the system is put under a heavy drain. In boys and men the pollutions or night losses may occur several times a week or even every night, or several times a night. When they occur with such frequency the man may become a wreck. Not so with women. First, pollutions or night dreams in women are much more rare than they are in men; and second, as just mentioned, the fluid secreted by woman during intercourse or during an erotic dream is not of a vital character, as the semen is in man; it is mucus, and the secretion of a mucous fluid, even if somewhat excessive, does not constitute a drain on the system. For this reason women can stand frequently repeated sex relations and emissions or pollutions much better than men can.

In men, orgasms during sleep are significant (see the author's "Sex Knowledge for Men"), because semen is an essential fluid, and losing it too often can seriously deplete the body. Boys and men may experience these nocturnal emissions several times a week or even every night, sometimes multiple times a night. When this happens too frequently, it can lead to significant physical decline. Women, on the other hand, have a different experience. For one, these emissions in women are much rarer than in men; and also, as previously noted, the fluid that women release during sex or erotic dreams is not essential like semen is for men; it's mucus, and even if it occurs in larger amounts, it doesn't drain the system. Because of this, women can endure repeated sexual encounters and emissions much better than men can.



SUBCHAPTER D

THE SECONDARY SEX CHARACTERS

The sex organs constitute the primary sex characters. It is they that distinguish primarily one sex from another. But there are numerous other sex characters or sex differences which while not so important serve to differentiate the sexes, at the same time forming points of attraction between one sex and another. For instance, the beard and mustache are a distinct male characteristic and constitute one of the secondary male sex characters. The secondary sex characters are very numerous; one might say that each one of the billions of cells in the body bears the impress of the sex to which it belongs.

The sex organs are the main traits that define each sex. They are what primarily set one sex apart from the other. However, there are many other sex traits or differences that, while not as significant, help to distinguish the sexes and create points of attraction between them. For example, a beard and mustache are clear male traits and are considered secondary male characteristics. There are many secondary sex characteristics; you could say that each of the billions of cells in the body reflects the sex it belongs to.

First, the skeleton. The entire female skeleton differs from the male skeleton; all the bones are smaller and more gracile; the pelvis, as we have seen before, is shallower and wider. Then the muscles are smaller and more rounded. The entire contour of the body is rounded rather than angular as in man. The skin is finer, softer, more delicate. The hair on the head is longer and of a finer texture, while over the body the hair is also finer and less abundant. The voice is finer, more pleasant, and of a higher pitch (soprano). The breasts are well [61]developed, and serve an important purpose, while in men they are rudimentary. The breathing is also different; woman breathes principally with the upper part of the chest, man with the lower. The brain is smaller and its convolutions somewhat less complex in woman.

First, the skeleton. The entire female skeleton is different from the male skeleton; all the bones are smaller and more slender; the pelvis, as we've seen before, is shallower and wider. Then the muscles are smaller and rounder. The overall shape of the body is more rounded rather than angular like in men. The skin is finer, softer, and more delicate. The hair on the head is longer and has a finer texture, while the body hair is also finer and less abundant. The voice is softer, more pleasant, and at a higher pitch (soprano). The breasts are well [61]developed and serve an important function, while in men they are minimal. Breathing patterns are also different; women primarily breathe with the upper part of the chest, while men breathe with the lower part. The brain is smaller, and its folds are somewhat less complex in women.

Woman differs considerably from man not only physically, as we have seen, but also mentally and emotionally. But into this phase of the subject we will not enter, except to remark that it is foolish to speak of the superiority or inferiority of one sex to another. In some respects man is greatly superior to woman, in others he is inferior; on the whole the sexes balance one another pretty well, and while the sexes are not and never will be exactly alike, we have no right to speak of the inferiority of one sex to another. We recognize that the sexes are different, but they complement one another, and the claim of the reactionary and of the woman-hater that woman is an inferior creature is just as senseless as is the claim made by some ultra-militant feminists that woman is the superior and man the inferior.

Women differ significantly from men not just physically, as we’ve seen, but also mentally and emotionally. However, we won't dive into that aspect right now, except to say that it's pointless to argue about the superiority or inferiority of one sex over the other. In some ways, men are clearly better than women, and in other ways, they aren't. Overall, the sexes balance each other out pretty well. While men and women aren’t and never will be exactly the same, we have no justification for claiming that one sex is inferior to the other. We acknowledge that the sexes are different, but they complete each other. The idea held by some traditionalists and woman-haters that women are inferior is just as ridiculous as the belief held by some extreme feminists that women are superior and men are inferior.




FOOTNOTES:

[3] The ovum is really the fully mature egg ready for fecundation; before maturity it should not be called ovum but oöcyte; and in advanced treatises it is so referred to. But here ovum will do for both the unripe and ripe egg.

[3] The ovum is actually the fully mature egg ready for fertilization; before it matures, it should be called an oöcyte; and this is how it is referred to in more advanced texts. But for our purposes, we can use ovum for both the unripe and ripe egg.







Chapter FourToC

THE SEX INSTINCT

Universality of the Sex Instinct—Not Responsible for Our Thoughts and Feelings.

Universality of the Sexual Instinct—Not Responsible for Our Thoughts and Emotions.


The sex instinct, which runs all through nature from the lowest animal to the highest, is the inborn impulse, craving or desire which one sex has for the other: the male for the female and the female for the male. This instinct, this desire for the opposite sex, which is born with us and which manifests itself at a very early age, is not anything to be ashamed of. There is nothing disgraceful, nothing sinful in it. It is a normal, natural, healthy instinct, implanted in us by nature for various reasons, and absolutely indispensable for the perpetuation of the race. If there were anything to be ashamed of, it would be the lack of this sex instinct, for without it the race would quickly die out.

The sex drive, which exists throughout nature from the simplest animals to the most advanced, is the natural urge, craving, or desire that one sex has for the other: males for females and females for males. This instinct, this attraction to the opposite sex, is something we're born with and shows up at a very young age. There's nothing to be ashamed of. It's not disgraceful or sinful. It's a normal, natural, and healthy instinct, instilled in us by nature for various reasons, and it’s absolutely essential for the survival of our species. If there were anything to be ashamed of, it would be the absence of this sex drive, because without it, humanity would quickly cease to exist.

Not Responsible for Thoughts and Feelings. It is necessary to impress this point, because many girls and women, whose minds have been perverted by a vicious so-called morality, worry themselves to illness, brood and become hypochondriac because [63]they think they have committed a grievous sin in experiencing a desire for sexual relations or for the embrace of a certain man. Altogether it is necessary to impress upon the growing girl, when the occasion presents itself, that a thought or a feeling can never be sinful. An action may be, but a thought or a feeling cannot. Why? Because we are not responsible for our thoughts and feelings; they are not under our control. Though it does not mean that when they do arise we are to give them full sway. We should attempt to combat them and drive them away, but there is nothing to be ashamed of, because for their origin we are not responsible.

Not Responsible for Thoughts and Feelings. It’s important to make this clear, as many girls and women, whose minds have been warped by a harmful so-called morality, become so anxious that they end up sick, dwelling on their thoughts and becoming hypochondriacs because [63] they believe they have committed a serious sin by wanting sexual intimacy or longing for a specific man. It is essential to reassure the developing girl, whenever the opportunity arises, that a thought or a feeling can never be sinful. Only actions can be sinful, not thoughts or feelings. Why is that? Because we are not in charge of our thoughts and feelings; they are beyond our control. However, this doesn’t mean we should let them take over when they arise. We should try to challenge and push them away, but there’s no reason to feel ashamed, as we are not responsible for their origins.

Responsible for Actions. Our actions are under our control, to a certain extent at least, and if we do a bad or injurious act, we have committed a sin and are morally responsible. The desire for the sexual act is no more sinful than the desire for food is when one is hungry. But the performance of the act may, under certain circumstances, be as sinful as the eating of food which the hungry man obtained by robbing another fellow-being, just as poor as himself.

Responsible for Actions. Our actions are mostly within our control, and if we do something harmful or wrong, we have sinned and are morally responsible. The desire for sex is no more sinful than the desire for food when someone is hungry. However, actually engaging in the act can, in certain situations, be as sinful as a hungry person stealing food from someone else who is just as poor.

I am not preaching to you. But I am not an extremist nor a hypocrite. I am advocating neither asceticism nor licentiousness. One is as bad, or almost as bad, as the other.

I’m not trying to preach to you. But I’m neither an extremist nor a hypocrite. I’m not promoting strict self-denial or excessive indulgence. Both are equally bad, or almost as bad, as each other.

[64]What I am trying to do is to inculcate in your minds, if possible, a sane, well-balanced view of all things sexual.

[64]What I'm trying to do is help you develop a healthy, balanced perspective on everything related to sex.

For I believe that wrong, perverted views of the physiology and hygiene of the sex act and of sex morality, that is, the proper relationship of the sexes, are responsible for untold misery, for incalculable suffering. Both sexes suffer, but the female sex suffers more. The woman always pays more. This is due to her natural disabilities (menstruation, pregnancy, lactation), to her age-long repression, to the fact that she must be sought but never seek, and to her economic dependence.

For I believe that misguided and distorted views on the physiology and hygiene of the sexual act and of sexual morality, meaning the appropriate relationship between the sexes, are responsible for immense misery and unmeasurable suffering. Both sexes are affected, but women suffer more. Women always bear the heavier burden. This is due to their natural challenges (menstruation, pregnancy, breastfeeding), their long history of repression, the expectation that they must be pursued rather than pursue, and their economic dependence.

For the above reasons, sex instruction is a matter of double importance to woman—this fact has been emphasized in the first chapter. But woman's disabilities impose upon us another duty: because she carries the heaviest burden, because she always pays more dearly than the man, it becomes incumbent upon man to treat her with special consideration, with genuine kindness and chivalry.

For these reasons, sex education is especially important for women—this point was highlighted in the first chapter. However, women's struggles create another responsibility for us: because they bear the greatest burden, because they often suffer more than men, it is essential for men to treat them with care, genuine kindness, and respect.







Chapter FiveToC

PUBERTY

Physical Changes in Puberty—Physical Changes in the Genital Organs and in the Rest of the Body—Psychic Changes—Puberty and Adolescence—Nubility.

Physical Changes in Puberty—Changes in the Genital Organs and the Rest of the Body—Emotional Changes—Puberty and Adolescence—Coming of Age.


Puberty is the most wonderful, the most significant period in a girl's life. Important as it is in a boy's life and development, it is still more so in a girl's. At this period there are often laid the foundations which either make or mar the girl's future life.

Puberty is the most amazing, the most important time in a girl's life. While it's also significant for a boy's life and growth, it's even more crucial for a girl. During this time, the foundations are often set that can either shape or ruin a girl's future.

The meaning of the word puberty is maturity. It is the period at which the girl and the boy reach sexual maturity; in other words, the period at which the sex glands of the boy begin to generate spermatozoa, and the sex glands of the girl begin to mature and expel eggs or ova; with the girl puberty is marked by an additional phenomenon, which has no analogue in the boy, namely, menstruation.

The term puberty refers to maturity. It’s the time when girls and boys reach sexual maturity; that is, the time when the boy’s sex glands start producing sperm, and the girl’s sex glands begin to mature and release eggs or ova. For girls, puberty is also marked by another phenomenon that doesn’t occur in boys: menstruation.

Physical Changes. The word puberty is derived from the word puber, which in Latin means mature, ripe. But the word puber is itself derived from the word pubes, which in Latin means fine hair [66]or down. For at this period of maturity all mammals (that is animals which have breasts and nurse their young) begin to develop a growth of hair. You know that our entire body, with the exception of the palms of the hands and the soles of the feet, is covered with innumerable hair follicles, and from our birth our entire body, with the exception named, is covered with fine hair. The hair may be too delicate to be seen, but it is there, and with a magnifying glass you can see it without any trouble. But at puberty the hair increases in thickness and in quantity, and becomes abundant in places where it was hardly noticeable before—the upper lip and face in boys, and the armpits and lower part of the abdomen in both boys and girls.

Physical Changes. The word puberty comes from the word puber, which means mature or ripe in Latin. But puber is actually derived from pubes, meaning fine hair [66] or down. At this stage of maturity, all mammals (those that have breasts and nurse their young) start to grow hair. Our entire body, except for the palms of our hands and the soles of our feet, is covered with countless hair follicles, and since birth, our bodies have been coated with fine hair, even if it’s too thin to see. You can spot it easily with a magnifying glass. When puberty hits, this hair gets thicker and more abundant, showing up more noticeably in areas like the upper lip and face for boys, and in the armpits and lower abdomen for both boys and girls.

And so the first apparent physical sign of puberty in a girl is the gradual appearance of hair in the armpits, on the mons Veneris and the labia majora. But all the genital organs are undergoing rapid development; the vulva, the vagina, the uterus and the ovaries become larger, and the ovaries which up to that time were elaborating an internal secretion only, now also begin to manufacture ova; in other words, the monthly process of ovulation is begun. Synchronously with the process of ovulation, there commences the monthly function of menstruation. The breasts also increase in size, assume [67]the characteristic contour, develop their glandular substance, and become capable of secreting milk for the use of any possible offspring. During this period of development they are often very sensitive to the touch or feel painful without being touched.

And so the first noticeable physical sign of puberty in a girl is the gradual growth of hair in the armpits, on the pubic area, and on the labia majora. However, all the genital organs are rapidly developing; the vulva, vagina, uterus, and ovaries grow larger, and the ovaries, which until that point had only been producing hormones, now also start to create eggs; in other words, the monthly process of ovulation begins. Along with the ovulation process, menstruation also starts each month. The breasts increase in size, take on their characteristic shape, develop glandular tissue, and become ready to produce milk for any potential offspring. During this development stage, they can often be very sensitive to touch or feel painful even when not touched.

But not only the genital organs undergo growth and development—the entire body participates in the process. The growth in height is the most rapid at this period; the greatest growth takes place in the limbs—legs and arms. The pelvis becomes broader, and the chest or thorax also becomes broader and larger. The muscles become larger and rounder and finally give the girl the beautiful womanly form.

But it's not just the genital organs that grow and develop—the whole body is involved in the process. Height increases the fastest during this time; the most significant growth occurs in the limbs—legs and arms. The pelvis widens, and the chest also becomes broader and larger. The muscles grow bigger and rounder, ultimately giving the girl a beautiful, feminine shape.

Psychic Changes. But the changes are not only physical; the changes that take place in the girl's psychic sphere during the pubertal years are also highly important. That is the period of the development of the emotions; she is overflowing with emotion; she becomes sensitive; in her relations with boys and men she becomes self-conscious. Distinct sexual desire fortunately does not make its appearance in the girl at this period, as it does in the boy, but she becomes filled with vague undefined and undefinable longings. It is the period of "crushes" when the girl is apt to bestow her overflowing emotion on a girl friend. There is nothing [68]reprehensible in these crushes—they act as a safety valve—and only in rare cases are they apt to lead to abnormal development. This is also the period of day-dreaming and of romancing; the girl likes to read love-stories and novels in which she identifies herself with the heroine. And it makes quite some difference as to what the girl reads during this period, for literature has a strong influence on the young in the most plastic period of their lives; and it is important that older persons see to it that those in their care spend their time on books of noble ideals and high artistic value.

Psychic Changes. The changes are not just physical; the shifts happening in a girl's emotional state during puberty are also very significant. This is the time when her emotions start to develop; she feels a surge of emotions and becomes more sensitive. In her interactions with boys and men, she becomes self-conscious. Thankfully, distinct sexual desire doesn't emerge for her at this stage as it does for boys, but she experiences vague, undefined longings. It's a time for "crushes," where she often directs her overflowing emotions toward a close female friend. There's nothing [68] wrong with these crushes—they serve as a release—and only rarely do they lead to unhealthy development. This is also a time for daydreaming and romantic fantasies; she enjoys reading love stories and novels where she sees herself as the heroine. It's quite important what she reads during this period, as literature has a strong impact on young people in this impressionable stage of their lives. Therefore, it's essential for adults to ensure that those they care for engage with books that promote noble ideals and high artistic value.

Girls of a highly sensitive or so-called "nervous" temperament, especially if there is "nervousness" in the family, must be particularly looked after. For it is during the years of puberty and adolescence that any neurotic traits are apt to develop and become emphasized. It is also the period when bad sexual habits (masturbation) are apt to develop, and the careful mother will devote special attention to her girls in their years of puberty, and guard them as much as possible against physical and emotional shocks.

Girls with a highly sensitive or "nervous" temperament, especially if there's a history of "nervousness" in the family, need to be watched closely. This is the time during puberty and adolescence when any neurotic traits are likely to emerge and become more pronounced. It's also when unhealthy sexual habits (like masturbation) can develop, so a caring mother should pay special attention to her daughters during puberty and protect them as much as possible from physical and emotional shocks.

The age of puberty in girls is by many writers considered as synonymous or synchronous with the onset of menstruation, which in this country in the majority of cases occurs between the ages of [69]thirteen and fourteen. The year of gradual development before the onset of menstruation is by some referred to as the pre-pubertal year; and the first year after the onset of menstruation is the post-pubertal year. The period from puberty to full sexual maturity is called adolescence, and this term is applied generally to the period between thirteen and eighteen. For at eighteen the boy and the girl have reached full maturity. Mentally we acquire things as long as we live, and even physically the body gets larger for some years after eighteen. But sexually both boys and girls are fully mature at eighteen, though in order to become parents it is best, for various reasons, to wait to the ages of twenty or twenty-five.

The age of puberty in girls is often seen by many writers as the same or happening at the same time as the start of menstruation, which in this country typically occurs between the ages of [69]thirteen and fourteen. The year of gradual development leading up to the start of menstruation is sometimes called the pre-pubertal year; the first year after menstruation begins is known as the post-pubertal year. The time from puberty to full sexual maturity is referred to as adolescence, generally spanning from ages thirteen to eighteen. At eighteen, both boys and girls are considered fully mature. Mentally, we continue to learn throughout our lives, and even physically, our bodies grow for several years after eighteen. However, both boys and girls are sexually mature by eighteen, though it's generally better, for various reasons, to wait until twenty or twenty-five to become parents.

Nubility. Nubility is the age or state when a boy or a girl is "fit" for marriage. This is a vague and unsatisfactory term. At the age of thirteen to fifteen boys and girls are physically "fit" for marriage, that is at that age a boy is capable of begetting and a girl of having children. But it does not mean that it would be advisable for them to marry at such an early age. Neither their bodies nor their minds are fully developed, and children begotten of such young parents are apt to be weaklings, both mentally and physically. The youngest age for girls [70]to marry should be eighteen, and for boys twenty; but the youngest age for becoming parents should be twenty to twenty-two for the mother and twenty-three to twenty-five for the father.

Nubility. Nubility is the age or state when a boy or girl is "ready" for marriage. This is a vague and unsatisfactory term. Between the ages of thirteen and fifteen, boys and girls are physically "ready" for marriage, meaning at that age a boy can father children and a girl can have children. But that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea for them to marry that young. Neither their bodies nor their minds are fully developed, and children born to such young parents tend to be weak, both mentally and physically. The youngest age for girls [70]to marry should be eighteen, and for boys, twenty; but the youngest age for becoming parents should be twenty to twenty-two for mothers and twenty-three to twenty-five for fathers.







Chapter SixToC

MENSTRUATION

Definition of Menstruation—Where Menstrual Blood Comes From—Age of Menstruation—Age of Cessation of Menstruation—Duration—Amount—Regularity and Irregularity.

Definition of Menstruation—Where Menstrual Blood Comes From—Starting Age of Menstruation—Ending Age of Menstruation—Duration—Amount—Regularity and Irregularity.


The first function with which the girl will be confronted, which will impress upon her that she is a creature of sex, that she is decidedly different from the boy, is menstruation. And this function we will now proceed to study.

The first experience the girl will face, which will make her aware that she is a sexual being, and that she is definitely different from the boy, is menstruation. We will now move on to explore this function.

What is menstruation? Menstruation is a monthly discharge of blood. The word is derived from the Latin word mensis, which means a month; and menstruation is also frequently spoken of as the menses. It is also called the catamenia or catamenia-flow (Greek, kata—by, men—a month). Other terms are: the periods, courses, monthlies, turns, monthly changes, monthly sickness, sickness, flowers, to be unwell, to be regular. "Not to see anything" is a common term for having missed the menses. This flow of blood recurs in most cases with remarkable regularity once a month; not a calendar month, but once a lunar month, i.e., once every twenty-eight [72]days. And as there are thirteen lunar months a year, a woman menstruates not twelve but thirteen times a year.

What is menstruation? Menstruation is a monthly discharge of blood. The word comes from the Latin word mensis, which means a month; and menstruation is often referred to as the menses. It’s also called catamenia or catamenia-flow (from Greek, kata—by, men—a month). Other terms include periods, courses, monthlies, turns, monthly changes, monthly sickness, sickness, flowers, feeling unwell, or being regular. "Not to see anything" is a common way to say someone has missed their period. This blood flow typically happens with notable regularity once a month; not a calendar month, but every lunar month, meaning once every twenty-eight [72] days. Since there are thirteen lunar months in a year, a woman menstruates not twelve but thirteen times a year.

Where does the menstrual blood come from? The menstrual blood comes from the inside of the womb. Every month, for a few days prior to menstruation, the inside lining of the womb (what we call the mucous membrane or endometrium) becomes congested and its bloodvessels become distended with blood. If the woman has sexual intercourse and pregnancy happens to take place, then this extra blood is used to nourish and develop the new child; but if no pregnancy takes place, that extra blood exudes from the bloodvessels (some of the bloodvessels rupture) and is discharged from the uterus into the vagina, and from there to the outside, where it is caught on cotton, sanitary napkins or some other pad.

Where does menstrual blood come from? Menstrual blood comes from inside the uterus. Every month, for a few days before menstruation, the inner lining of the uterus (known as the mucous membrane or endometrium) becomes swollen, and its blood vessels become engorged with blood. If a woman has sexual intercourse and pregnancy occurs, this extra blood helps nourish and develop the new baby; but if no pregnancy happens, that extra blood leaks from the blood vessels (some blood vessels rupture) and is expelled from the uterus into the vagina, from where it exits the body, usually caught on cotton, sanitary napkins, or other pads.

At what age does menstruation begin? The usual age at which menstruation begins in this country is thirteen or fourteen; in some it may occur as early as twelve, in others as late as fifteen, sixteen or even seventeen. For menstruation to begin earlier than twelve or later than seventeen is in this country a rare exception. But in cold northern climates the age of eighteen is not rare, and in the hot southern climates menstruation often starts at the ages [73]of ten or eleven. Change of climate or of country will often have an influence on the menses. In the early years of his medical practice, the author had many Finnish girls as patients. It was a very common occurrence for them to stop menstruating for the first few months or even for the first year of their residence in this country.

At what age does menstruation begin? In this country, menstruation typically starts around the ages of thirteen or fourteen; in some cases, it can occur as early as twelve, while in others, it may not start until fifteen, sixteen, or even seventeen. It's quite rare for menstruation to begin before twelve or after seventeen in this country. However, in colder northern climates, the onset at eighteen isn't uncommon, and in warmer southern climates, it often begins around ten or eleven. A change in climate or country can frequently affect menstruation. During the early years of his medical practice, the author saw many Finnish girls as patients. It was quite common for them to stop menstruating for the first few months or even up to a year after moving to this country.

At what age does menstruation cease? The age at which menstruation ceases is called the menopause or climacteric. It usually takes place at the age of forty-eight or fifty. In some cases it does not take place until the age of fifty-two, in others it takes place as early as forty-five or forty-four. In general, it may be said that the woman's menstruating period, during which she is able to have children, lasts about thirty-five years. And if no restraint be taken, and if no precautions be taken against conception, a woman could have twenty or thirty children during her childbearing period.

At what age does menstruation stop? The age when menstruation stops is called menopause or climacteric. It typically happens around the ages of forty-eight or fifty. In some instances, it may not occur until fifty-two, while in others, it can begin as early as forty-four or forty-five. Generally, it's said that a woman's menstruating phase, during which she can have children, lasts about thirty-five years. If no measures are taken, a woman could potentially have twenty or thirty children during her childbearing years.

How many days does a woman menstruate? The usual number of days is from three to five; in some cases menstruation lasts only two days, in others as long as seven. As a rule, the greatest amount of blood passed is during the first two days.

How many days does a woman menstruate? The typical duration is between three to five days; in some instances, menstruation lasts just two days, while in others it can extend up to seven days. Generally, the heaviest bleeding occurs during the first two days.

The amount of blood. It is hard to estimate the exact amount of blood passed by a woman during her menses, but it reaches about an ounce and a [74]half to three ounces. In some women the amount may reach as much as four or five ounces and in exceptional cases as much as eight ounces. Where it exceeds this amount, it is an abnormal condition, requiring treatment. The usual statement that a normally menstruating woman should not have to use more than three napkins during the twenty-four hours is correct.

The amount of blood. It’s difficult to estimate the exact amount of blood a woman loses during her period, but it’s around one ounce and a [74] half to three ounces. In some women, the amount can be as high as four or five ounces, and in rare cases, it can reach eight ounces. If it goes beyond this amount, it’s considered an abnormal condition that needs treatment. The common belief that a normally menstruating woman shouldn’t need to use more than three pads in a twenty-four hour period is accurate.

The periodical regularity with which menstruation recurs in many women is remarkable. I know a woman who has not missed her menses in twenty years; during those twenty years the menses have started every fourth Friday, almost always at the same hour. I know another one who has her menses every fourth Wednesday, about seven in the morning. She skipped her periods during her two pregnancies, then they were irregular for a while, then they came back to Wednesday. Other women have their menses on a certain day of the month, say the first or the fifth, regardless of the number of days in the month (such cases are, however, exceptional). And in some women the menses are irregular: every three weeks, every five or six weeks, every six or seven weeks, etc. Some women never know when they may expect their menses, so irregular they are.

The regularity with which menstruation occurs for many women is impressive. I know a woman who hasn’t missed her period in twenty years; during those years, her period has started every fourth Friday, usually at the same time. I know another woman who has her period every fourth Wednesday, around seven in the morning. She did not have her periods during her two pregnancies, then they were irregular for a while, but eventually returned to Wednesday. Other women have their periods on a specific day of the month, like the first or the fifth, regardless of how many days are in that month (though these cases are rare). Some women experience irregular periods: every three weeks, every five or six weeks, every six or seven weeks, etc. Some women never know when to expect their periods because they are so irregular.







Chapter SevenToC

ABNORMALITIES OF MENSTRUATION

Disorders of Menstruation—Menorrhagia—Metrorrhagia—Amenorrhea—Vicarious Menstruation—Dysmenorrhea of Organic and of Nervous Origin.

Disorders of Menstruation—Heavy Periods—Irregular Periods—Missing Periods—Unusual Period Symptoms—Painful Periods from Physical and Emotional Causes.


In many girls and women menstruation is a perfectly normal, physiological process. They suffer no discomfort whatever from it. They suffer no pains, no headache, no irritability, they have no admonition of its onset, until they feel the blood oozing or trickling out. But, unfortunately, this is true only of a small percentage. The majority of women have some unpleasant symptoms. Some have a headache for a day or two, some complain of a dragging down sensation, some are irritable, feel depressed or quarrelsome; some have no appetite, no ambition, no desire for work or company, while some girls have such severe pains and cramps that they are obliged to go to bed for a day or two and call in medical aid.

For many girls and women, menstruation is a completely normal physiological process. They experience no discomfort at all. They don't have any pain, headaches, or irritability; they don't even realize it's starting until they feel the blood oozing or trickling out. Unfortunately, this is only true for a small percentage. Most women experience some unpleasant symptoms. Some have headaches for a day or two, some feel a dragging sensation, some are irritable, feel depressed, or become quarrelsome; some lose their appetite, lack motivation, and don't want to work or socialize, while some girls have such severe pain and cramps that they need to spend a day or two in bed and seek medical help.

When the menstruation is very profuse, resembling more a hemorrhage than normal menstruation, it is called menorrhagia; if the hemorrhage from [76]the uterus occurs out of the regular menstrual periods, it is called metrorrhagia. When the menses are skipped, or when they are so scanty that you can hardly notice any blood, we use the term amenorrhea. In a few rare cases the menstruation instead of coming normally from the uterus, comes from some other part of the body, for instance, the nose. Some women have a hemorrhage from the nose every month. In some a bloody discharge may come from the breasts. To such a substitute menstruation we apply the term vicarious menstruation. Such cases, however, are rare, and are mere curiosities.

When menstruation is very heavy, looking more like a hemorrhage than regular menstruation, it’s called menorrhagia; if bleeding from [76]the uterus happens outside of the normal menstrual cycle, it’s known as metrorrhagia. When periods are missed, or when they’re so light that you barely notice any blood, we refer to it as amenorrhea. In a few rare instances, menstruation occurs not from the uterus but from another part of the body, like the nose. Some women experience a nosebleed every month. For some, a bloody discharge might come from the breasts. This unusual type of menstruation is called vicarious menstruation. However, such cases are rare and are simply curiosities.

Dysmenorrhea. I mentioned before that in some girls and women the menses are accompanied by pains and cramps. This affliction, which is the lot of millions of women, and from which men are entirely free, is called dysmenorrhea. Dysmenorrhea means painful and difficult menstruation. A slight pain or at least a feeling of discomfort is present in most cases of menstruation. But in many cases the pain is so severe, so excruciating, that the sufferer, girl or woman, is incapacitated for any work, and must go to bed for a day or two. In some cases the pain is so severe as to necessitate the use of morphine, and as it is a very bad thing to have to give morphine every three or four weeks, [77]every endeavor should be made to find out the cause of the trouble and to remove it. It is a mistake, however, to think that all or even most cases of dysmenorrhea are due to some local trouble, that is, to an inflammation of the ovaries, or a displacement of the womb. Many cases of dysmenorrhea are of nervous origin; the cause resides in the central nervous system, and not in the genital organs themselves. It is, therefore, not advisable to undertake any local treatment, unless a competent physician has made a thorough examination and has decided that local treatment is advisable.

Dysmenorrhea. As I mentioned earlier, some girls and women experience pain and cramps during their periods. This condition, which affects millions of women and doesn't affect men at all, is called dysmenorrhea. Dysmenorrhea refers to painful and difficult menstruation. Most women experience at least some discomfort during their periods, but in many cases, the pain is so intense, so excruciating, that the person suffering—whether a girl or a woman—can’t work and needs to stay in bed for a day or two. In some instances, the pain is so extreme that it requires morphine, and since it’s not ideal to rely on morphine every three or four weeks, [77]it’s important to determine the cause of the issue and address it. However, it’s a misconception to believe that most cases of dysmenorrhea stem from some local issue, like inflammation of the ovaries or a displacement of the uterus. Many cases of dysmenorrhea have a nervous origin; the cause lies in the central nervous system, not in the reproductive organs themselves. Therefore, it’s best to avoid any local treatment unless a qualified physician has conducted a thorough examination and determined that such treatment is appropriate.

As to the percentage of dysmenorrhea, a recent statistical examination of 4,000 women showed that dysmenorrhea of some degree was present in over one-half, namely, 52 per cent.

As for the percentage of dysmenorrhea, a recent statistical analysis of 4,000 women revealed that dysmenorrhea was experienced to some degree by more than half, specifically 52 percent.







Chapter EightToC

THE HYGIENE OF MENSTRUATION

Lack of Cleanliness During Menstrual Period—Superstitious Beliefs—Hygiene of Menstruation.

Lack of Cleanliness During Menstrual Period—Superstitious Beliefs—Hygiene of Menstruation.


The hygiene of menstruation can be expressed in two words: cleanliness and rest. Common sense would suggest these two measures, and as far as rest is concerned, many women do rest or take it easy while they are unwell. Some are forced to do it, because, if they don't, their dysmenorrhea is worse and the amount of blood they lose is considerably increased. The same cannot be said of cleanliness. Due undoubtedly to the superstitious opinions about menstruation, which came over to us from the ages-of-long-ago, menstruation is still considered a noli-me-tangere, and women are afraid to bathe, to douche or even to wash during the periods. And if there is any period when a woman needs a douche it is during menstruation. Any leucorrhea that a woman may be suffering from becomes aggravated around the periods; the menstrual blood of some women has a decided odor, and if no cleansing douche is taken during four [79]or five days, some of the blood decomposes and acquires a decidedly offensive odor, which can be noticed at some distance and to which some men and women are very susceptible. There are some women who never take a vaginal douche. Some consider it a useless and unnecessary luxury; while some orthodox puritanical women consider it an ungodly procedure (forgetting that cleanliness is next to godliness) fit only for women of gay and questionable character. If these orthodox women knew what was good for them—and for their health—they would take a douche at least during menstruation, if at no other time.

The hygiene of menstruation can be summed up in two words: cleanliness and rest. It's common sense to consider these two aspects, and when it comes to rest, many women do take it easy while they’re unwell. Some have to, because if they don't, their cramps get worse and they lose significantly more blood. However, the same cannot be said for cleanliness. Due to outdated superstitions about menstruation that have persisted over time, menstruation is still treated as something to be avoided, and women often hesitate to bathe, douche, or even wash during their periods. Yet, if there’s ever a time when a woman should be using a douche, it’s during menstruation. Any discharge a woman may experience tends to worsen during her period; the menstrual blood of some can have a strong odor, and if a cleansing douche isn’t used for four [79] or five days, some of the blood can decompose and develop a distinctly unpleasant smell, which can be noticeable from a distance and to which some people are quite sensitive. There are women who never douche. Some consider it an unnecessary luxury, while others with strict beliefs think it's an inappropriate practice (forgetting that cleanliness is next to godliness), meant only for women of loose morals. If these women realized what was best for them—and for their health—they would use a douche at least during their menstruation, if not at any other time.

Cleanliness. When the girl reaches the age of twelve or thirteen the mother should explain to her the phenomenon of menstruation and the likelihood of its making its appearance in a short time. Of course she should be told that there is nothing shameful in it, that when it makes its appearance she should at once tell her mother, who will instruct her what to do. She should be shown the use of sanitary napkins. Rags, unless recently washed and kept wrapped up and protected from dust, should not be used. Unclean rags may lead to infection. I have no doubt that many cases of leucorrhea date back their origin to unwashed rags. Every morning and every evening the girl should wash the [80]external genitals with warm water, or plain soap and water. Married women should also take a douche once a day—the douche may consist of two quarts of water in which has been dissolved a teaspoonful of common table salt, or a tablespoonful of borax or boric acid. Such things like alum, potassium permanganate, carbolic acid, lactic acid, or tincture of iodine should only be used when there is leucorrhea present and generally only under a physician's directions. Bathing is permissible, but it is safe to use only a lukewarm bath. Cold tub baths, cold shower baths, as well as ocean and river bathing are best avoided during the period; at least during the first two days. I do not give this as an absolute rule; I know women who bathe and swim in the ocean during their menstrual periods without any injury to themselves, but they are exceptionally robust women; advice in books is for the average person, and it is always best to be on the safe side.

Cleanliness. When a girl turns twelve or thirteen, her mother should explain menstruation to her and let her know that it might start soon. She should understand that there is nothing shameful about it, and when it happens, she should immediately tell her mother, who will guide her on what to do. The girl should be shown how to use sanitary napkins. Rags should not be used unless they've been recently washed and are stored wrapped up and protected from dust, as dirty rags can lead to infections. I believe many cases of leucorrhea originate from unwashed rags. Every morning and evening, the girl should wash her [80] external genitals with warm water or mild soap and water. Married women should also do a douche once a day—this can be two quarts of water with a teaspoon of regular table salt or a tablespoon of borax or boric acid. Substances like alum, potassium permanganate, carbolic acid, lactic acid, or tincture of iodine should only be used when leucorrhea is present and generally only under a doctor's advice. Bathing is allowed, but it’s safer to stick to lukewarm baths. Cold tub baths, cold showers, and swimming in the ocean or rivers should preferably be avoided during menstruation, at least for the first two days. I’m not saying this is an absolute rule; I know some women who swim in the ocean during their periods without any issues, but they are usually very healthy. Guidelines in books are meant for the average person, and it's always better to be cautious.

Rest. Rest is just as important during menstruation as cleanliness, if not more so. Some women as mentioned before feel during their menses just as well as they do at other times, and do not need any special hygiene. But these are in the minority. Most girls and women do feel somewhat below par during that period, and it is very important that they take it easy, particularly during the first two [81]days. It is an outrage that many delicate, weak girls and women must stay on their feet all day or work on a machine when they should be at home in bed or lying down on a couch.

Rest. Rest is just as important during menstruation as cleanliness, if not more so. Some women, as mentioned before, feel just as good during their period as they do at other times and don’t need any special hygiene. But these are in the minority. Most girls and women feel somewhat off during that time, and it's really important that they take it easy, especially during the first two [81] days. It's outrageous that many delicate, weak girls and women have to stay on their feet all day or work a machine when they should be resting at home or lying down on the couch.

The womb is congested during the period, is larger and heavier than normal, and it is then that there is often laid the foundation for some future uterine disease, the well-known "womb trouble," or "female disease." It is not necessary that work be given up altogether, but there certainly should be less of it and there should be as much rest as possible. For delicate and sensitive girls it is always best to stay away from school during the first and second days. Speaking again of the average and not the exception, it is best that dancing, bicycle riding, horseback riding, rowing, and other athletic exercises be given up altogether during the menses. Automobile riding and railroad and carriage travelling prove injurious in some instances, greatly increasing the flow of blood. But these are the exceptions at the other extreme.

The uterus is swollen during menstruation, becoming larger and heavier than usual, which can sometimes lead to future uterine issues, commonly referred to as "womb trouble" or "female disease." It's not necessary to stop working completely, but there should definitely be less work, and as much rest as possible. For delicate and sensitive girls, it's usually best to skip school on the first and second days. Generally speaking, it's advisable to avoid dancing, biking, horseback riding, rowing, and other strenuous activities during this time. Traveling by car, train, or carriage can sometimes worsen the situation by increasing blood flow. However, these cases are on the rare side.







Chapter NineToC

FECUNDATION OR FERTILIZATION

Fecundation or Fertilization—Process of Fecundation—When the Ovum Matures—Fate of Ovum When no Intercourse Has Taken Place—Entrance of Spermatozoa as Result of Intercourse—The Spermatozoa in Search of the Ovum—Rapidity of Movements of Spermatozoa—Absorption of Spermatozoön by Ovum—Activity of Impregnated Ovum in Finding Place to Develop—Pregnancy in the Fallopian Tube and Its Dangers—Twin Pregnancy—Passivity of Ovum and Activity of Spermatozoön Foretell the Contrasting Rôles of the Man and the Woman Throughout Life.

Fertilization—Process of Fertilization—When the Egg Matures—What Happens to the Egg When There’s No Intercourse—Entry of Sperm as a Result of Intercourse—Sperm Searching for the Egg—Speed of Sperm Movement—Absorption of Sperm by the Egg—Activity of the Fertilized Egg in Finding a Place to Develop—Pregnancy in the Fallopian Tube and Its Risks—Twin Pregnancy—The Inactivity of the Egg and the Activity of the Sperm Predict the Different Roles of Men and Women Throughout Life.


Fecundation and fertilization are important terms to remember. They stand for the most important phenomenon in the living world. Without it there would be no plants and no animals, excepting a few very low forms of no importance, and of course no human beings.

Fecundation and fertilization are key terms to remember. They represent the most crucial process in the living world. Without it, there would be no plants or animals, aside from a few insignificant low forms, and obviously no human beings.

Fecundation or fertilization is the process of union of the female germ cell with the male germ cell; speaking of animals, it is the process of union of the egg or ovum of the female with the spermatozoön of the male. When a successful union of these two cells takes place a new being is started. The process of fertilization or fecundation is also [83]known as impregnation and conception. We say, to fertilize (chiefly, however, when speaking of plants) or to fecundate an ovum, or to impregnate a female or woman, and to conceive a child. We say the woman has become impregnated or has conceived.

Fertilization is the process where the female germ cell joins with the male germ cell; in animals, this is when the female's egg or ovum combines with the male's sperm cell. When these two cells successfully unite, a new life begins. The process of fertilization is also [83]known as conception. We say to fertilize (mainly when talking about plants) or to fertilize an ovum, or to impregnate a female or woman, and to conceive a child. We say the woman has become pregnant or has conceived.

The Process. The process of fecundation is briefly as follows. An ovum becomes mature, breaks through its Graafian follicle in the ovary and is set free. It is caught by the fimbriated or trumpet-shaped extremity of the Fallopian tube and, moved by the wave-like motion of the cilia[4] of the lining of the tube, it begins its travel towards the uterus. If no sexual intercourse has taken place nothing happens. The ovum dries up, or "dies," and either remains somewhere in the tube or womb or is removed from the latter with the menstruation, or mucous discharge. But if intercourse has taken place, thousands and thousands of the male germ cells or spermatozoa enter the uterus through its opening or external os, and begin to travel upward in search of the ovum. The spermatozoa are capable of independent motion, and they travel pretty fast. It is claimed that they can travel an inch in seven minutes, which is pretty fast when you take into consideration that a spermatozoön is only [84]1/300 of an inch long. Many of the spermatozoa, weaker than the others, perish on the way, and only a few continue the journey up through the uterus to the tube. When near the little ovum, which remains passive, their movements become more and more rapid, they seem to be attracted to it as if by a magnet, and finally one spermatozoön—just one—the one that happens to be the strongest or the nearest, makes a mad rush at it with its head, perforates it, and is completely swallowed up by it. As soon as the spermatozoön has been absorbed by the ovum, the opening through which it got in becomes tightly sealed up—a coagulation takes place near it—so that no other spermatozoa can enter the ovum. For if two or more spermatozoa got into the same ovum a monstrosity would be apt to be the result.

The Process. The process of fertilization is simply described as follows. An egg matures, breaks out of its Graafian follicle in the ovary, and is released. It is captured by the fimbriated or trumpet-shaped end of the Fallopian tube, and propelled by the wave-like motion of the cilia[4] lining the tube, it starts moving toward the uterus. If no sexual intercourse occurs, nothing happens. The egg shrivels up, or "dies," and either stays in the tube or uterus or is expelled during menstruation or a mucous discharge. But if intercourse has taken place, thousands of male germ cells or sperm enter the uterus through its opening or external os and begin moving upward in search of the egg. The sperm are capable of independent movement and travel quite quickly. It's said they can cover an inch in seven minutes, which is impressive considering a sperm is only [84]1/300 of an inch long. Many of the sperm, being weaker, die off on the journey, and only a few make it up through the uterus to the tube. As they approach the small, passive egg, their movements become increasingly frantic, as if they're drawn to it like a magnet, and ultimately one sperm—just one—the strongest or closest one, makes a desperate dash at it, penetrates it, and is totally absorbed by it. Once the sperm is absorbed by the egg, the opening it entered becomes tightly sealed, and a coagulation occurs near it, preventing any other sperm from entering the egg. If two or more sperm were to enter the same egg, it could lead to a monstrosity.

Spermatozoon Penetrating the Ovum.

Spermatozoön Penetrating the Ovum.

Sperm Cell Penetrating the Egg.

What becomes of all the other spermatozoa? They perish. Only one is needed. But in the ovum that has been impregnated, and which is now called an embryo, a feverish activity commences. First of all it looks for a fixed place of abode. If the ovum [85]happened to be in the uterus when the spermatozoön met and entered it, it remains there. It becomes attached to some spot in the lining of the womb and there it grows and develops, until at the end of nine months it has reached its full growth, and the womb opens and it comes out into the outside world. If the ovum is in the Fallopian tube when the spermatozoön meets it, as is usually the case, it travels down to the uterus, and fixes itself there.

What happens to all the other sperm cells? They die. Only one is needed. But in the egg that has been fertilized, which is now called an embryo, a flurry of activity begins. First, it seeks a stable place to settle. If the egg [85] was in the uterus when the sperm cell met and entered it, it stays there. It attaches to a spot in the lining of the womb and grows and develops until, after nine months, it reaches full size, and the womb opens, allowing it to enter the outside world. If the egg is in the Fallopian tube when the sperm cell meets it, as is usually the case, it moves down to the uterus and attaches itself there.

Extra-Uterine Pregnancy. The tube is a bad place for the ovum to grow and develop, because the tube cannot stretch to such an extent as the uterus can, nor can it furnish the embryo such good nourishment as the uterus can. Occasionally, however, it happens that the impregnated ovum remains in the tube and develops there; we then have a case of what we call extra-uterine (outside-of-the-uterus) or tubal pregnancy. Extra-uterine pregnancy is also called ectopic pregnancy, or ectopic gestation. Unless diagnosed early and operated upon, the woman may be in great danger, for after a few weeks or months the tube generally ruptures.

Extra-Uterine Pregnancy. The fallopian tube is not a suitable place for the egg to grow and develop because it can't stretch as much as the uterus can, nor can it provide the embryo with the same quality of nourishment. Sometimes, though, the fertilized egg stays in the tube and develops there; this is known as extra-uterine (outside the uterus) or tubal pregnancy. Extra-uterine pregnancy is also referred to as ectopic pregnancy or ectopic gestation. If it's not diagnosed early and treated, the woman could be in serious danger, as the tube usually ruptures after a few weeks or months.

From the moment the spermatozoön has entered the ovum, a process of division or segmentation commences. The ovum, which consists of one cell, divides into two, the two into four, the four into [86]eight, the eight into sixteen, these into thirty-two, these into sixty-four, 128, 256, 512, 1,024, until they can no longer be counted. This mulberry mass of cells arranges itself into two layers, with a cavity in between. And from these layers of cells there develop gradually all organs and tissues, until a fully formed and perfect child is the result. If two ova are impregnated at the same time by two spermatozoa, the result is twins.[5]

From the moment the sperm enters the egg, a process of division or segmentation begins. The egg, which starts as a single cell, divides into two, then those two into four, the four into [86]eight, the eight into sixteen, then thirty-two, sixty-four, 128, 256, 512, 1,024, and continues until they are too numerous to count. This cluster of cells organizes itself into two layers, with a cavity in between. From these layers of cells, all the organs and tissues gradually develop, resulting in a fully formed and perfect child. If two eggs are fertilized at the same time by two sperm, the outcome is twins.[5]

I might mention here that the moment the ovum is impregnated, i.e., joined by a spermatozoön, it is called technically a zygote; it is also called embryo, and this name is applied to it until the age of five or six weeks. Some use the term embryo up to two or three months. After that, until it is born, it is called fetus.

I should point out that the moment the egg is fertilized, meaning it joins with a sperm cell, it’s technically called a zygote; it’s also referred to as an embryo, and this term is used until about five or six weeks. Some people use the term embryo up to two or three months. After that, until birth, it’s called a fetus.

A study of the development of the embryo and the formation of the various organs from one single cell, the ovum, vitalized or fecundated by another single cell, the spermatozoön, is the most wonderful and most fascinating of all studies. But that belongs to the domain of Embryology, which is a separate science.

A study of how an embryo develops and how different organs form from a single cell, the ovum, which is energized or fertilized by another single cell, the sperm, is one of the most amazing and captivating areas of study. However, that falls under the field of Embryology, which is its own distinct science.

What we see in the process of fecundation is a foreshadowing of the future man and woman. The [87]ovum has no motion of its own, it is moved along by the wave-like motions of the lining cells of the Fallopian tube, and throughout the entire act it remains passive. The spermatozoön, on the other hand, is in a state of continuous activity from the moment it has been ejaculated by the male until it has reached its goal—the ovum. And as the spermatozoa carry in them the entire impress of the man, and the ova of the woman, they foretell us the fates of the future boy and girl. The woman's rôle throughout life is a passive and the man's an active one. And in choosing a mate the man will always be the active factor or pursuer. So biology seems to tell us. Whether education—using the word in its broadest sense—will effect a radical change in the relation of man and woman remains to be seen. A change putting the man and the woman on a footing of equality would be desirable; but whether biological differences having their roots in the remotest antiquity can be obliterated, is a question the answer of which lies in the distant future. As Geddes and Thomson so well said: The differences [between the sexes] may be exaggerated or lessened, but to obliterate them it would be necessary to have all the evolution over again on a new basis. What was decided among the prehistoric Protozoa cannot be annulled by act of Parliament.

What we see in the process of fertilization is a glimpse of the future man and woman. The [87]ovum doesn’t move on its own; it’s pushed along by the wavy movements of the cells lining the Fallopian tube, remaining passive throughout the entire process. The sperm, on the other hand, is always active from the moment it’s ejaculated by the male until it reaches its target—the ovum. Since the sperm carries the complete genetic makeup of the man and the ovum carries that of the woman, they indicate the futures of the future boy and girl. The woman's role throughout life is passive, while the man's is active. In choosing a partner, the man is always the one who takes the initiative. So biology seems to suggest. Whether education—using the term in its broadest sense—will lead to a significant change in the relationship between men and women is still to be seen. A change that places men and women on equal footing would be desirable; however, whether biological differences rooted in the distant past can be erased is a question with an answer that lies far in the future. As Geddes and Thomson aptly noted: The differences [between the sexes] may be emphasized or diminished, but to erase them entirely would require restarting evolution on a new foundation. What was established among the prehistoric Protozoa cannot be undone by legislative action.




FOOTNOTES:

[4] Hair-like appendages.

__A_TAG_PLACEHOLDER_0__ Hair-like structures.

[5] Each ovum has one germinal vesicle; occasionally one ovum may contain two germinal vesicles; and from the impregnation of such an ovum a twin pregnancy may result.

[5] Each egg has one germinal vesicle; sometimes an egg may have two germinal vesicles; and from the fertilization of such an egg, a twin pregnancy may occur.







Chapter TenToC

PREGNANCY

Period of Pregnancy in Human Female—Physiologic Process of Pregnancy—Growth of Embryo from Moment of Conception—Pregnant Woman Provides Nourishment for Two—Her Excreting Organs Must Work for Two.

Period of Pregnancy in Human Female—Physiologic Process of Pregnancy—Growth of Embryo from Moment of Conception—Pregnant Woman Provides Nourishment for Two—Her Excreting Organs Must Work for Two.


From the moment the ovum has been fertilized or fecundated by the spermatozoön, the woman is said to be pregnant (or in French enceinte. This term was used very frequently and is still used by prudes, who seem to consider the word pregnant vulgar and disgraceful). Pregnancy, or the period of gestation, lasts from the moment of conception to the moment that the fetus or child is expelled from the uterus. The period of pregnancy differs very widely in different animals,[6] but in the human female it lasts nine calendar months or ten lunar months—from about 274 to 280 days. We usually count 280 days from the first day of the last menstruation. A pregnant woman generally wants to know the day of the expected confinement—for [89]this purpose a table is appended to this chapter. If you know the first day of your last menstruation, you will see at a glance when the confinement may be expected. There may be a difference of a few days—either before or after the expected date—but for practical approximate purposes the tables serve very well.

From the moment the egg is fertilized by the sperm, the woman is considered pregnant (or in French, enceinte. This term has been used often and is still favored by some who find the word pregnant to be rude and inappropriate). Pregnancy, or the time of gestation, lasts from conception until the baby is born. The length of pregnancy varies greatly among different animals,[6] but in humans, it lasts nine calendar months or ten lunar months—about 274 to 280 days. We typically count 280 days from the first day of the last menstrual period. A pregnant woman usually wants to know when to expect delivery—for [89] this, a table is included in this chapter. If you know the first day of your last menstruation, you can quickly see when to expect the delivery. There may be a difference of a few days—either a little earlier or later than the expected date—but for practical purposes, the tables are quite useful.

A simple way is to count back three months and add seven days. For instance, a woman's last menstruation occurred on April 4th; counting back three months gives you January 4th; add seven days and you get January 11th, the probable date of delivery. The first day of the last menstruation was December 30th; counting back three months gives you September 30th; add seven days and you get October 6th, the probable date of delivery. The presence of a short month like February may be disregarded, as the calculation is not absolutely, but only approximately correct.

A straightforward method is to count back three months and add seven days. For example, if a woman's last period started on April 4th, counting back three months brings you to January 4th; adding seven days gives you January 11th, which is the estimated due date. If the first day of the last period was December 30th, counting back three months takes you to September 30th; adding seven days results in October 6th as the estimated due date. You can ignore shorter months like February since the calculation is approximate, not exact.

The period at which the child's movements begin to be felt by the mother is termed Quickening. It usually occurs at the middle of the pregnancy, between the 16th and 18th week.

The time when the mother first feels the baby's movements is called Quickening. This typically happens around the middle of the pregnancy, between the 16th and 18th week.

Pregnancy is a normal physiological process; but every active physiological process is apt to be accompanied by disturbances, and there is certainly no process in the animal body in which greater [90]activity, greater changes, go on than during the process of pregnancy. Just see what occurs in nine months. The uterus, at first the size of a small pear, reaches a size larger than that of the head of a big man; it does not merely stretch, as some think, but it actually grows enormously in size, the muscular walls of a pregnant uterus being many times thicker than those of a non-pregnant one. They have to be or they would not have the strength to expel the child, when the proper time comes. It is to be borne in mind that the child does not slip out by itself; it is the powerful muscular contractions of the uterus that push it out. If the uterus should refuse to work, if its walls were too thin or too weak, the child could not come out, but would have to be taken out with forceps. Still greater changes than in the uterus take place in the child itself. At the moment of conception it is the size of the head of a pin; at the moment of birth it weighs from seven to ten pounds; at the moment of conception it is a minute, undifferentiated mass of protoplasm, just a single fertilized cell; at the moment of birth it consists of millions and millions of cells, which have become differentiated into numerous harmoniously working organs, and different tissues, such as brain and nerve tissue, muscular tissue, connective tissue, bone, cartilage, etc., etc. A truly wonderful[91] [92]process. And in the meantime this child, which is biologically a parasite (though it is not a nice name to call it by) draws its sustenance from the mother's blood, and the mother has to provide nourishment for two. And, besides providing nourishment, her excreting organs, her kidneys, must work for two, because her system has also to get rid of the child's excretions. No wonder that the pregnant woman, particularly under an artificial unhealthy mode of living, is subject to many troubles and disturbances.

Pregnancy is a natural process, but any active physiological process can lead to disruptions, and there's no other process in the body that experiences such significant changes as pregnancy. Just think about what happens in nine months. The uterus, which starts off the size of a small pear, grows to be larger than a big man's head; it doesn't just stretch, as some might believe, but genuinely expands in size, with the muscular walls of a pregnant uterus being much thicker than those of a non-pregnant one. They need to be strong enough to push the baby out when the time comes. It's important to remember that the baby doesn’t just slip out on its own; it’s the powerful contractions of the uterus that push it out. If the uterus doesn’t contract properly, or if its walls are too thin or weak, the baby cannot be born and would need to be delivered using forceps. Even more significant changes happen in the baby itself. At conception, it’s the size of a pinhead; by birth, it weighs between seven to ten pounds. At conception, it’s just a tiny, undifferentiated mass of protoplasm—a single fertilized cell; by birth, it has developed into millions of cells organized into various functioning organs and different types of tissues, like brain and nerve tissue, muscle tissue, connective tissue, bone, and cartilage. It’s truly an amazing process. Meanwhile, this child, which is biologically a parasite (though that term isn’t very pleasant), extracts nutrients from the mother’s blood, and she has to nourish two lives. On top of providing nourishment, her excretory organs, like her kidneys, also have to work for two since her body must eliminate the child’s waste as well. It’s no surprise that pregnant women, especially under unhealthy living conditions, face many challenges and issues.


DR. ELY'S TABLE FOR CALCULATING THE DATE OF CONFINEMENT

January 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
October 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Nov.
February 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28        
November 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 1 2 3 4 5       Dec.
March 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
December 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 Jan.
April 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30    
January 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4   Feb.
May 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
February 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Mar.
June 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30    
March 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6   April
July 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
April 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 May
August 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
May 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 June
September 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30    
June 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 July
October 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
July 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Aug.
November 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30    
August 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6   Sep.
December 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31  
September 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Oct.

Explanation.—Find in top line the date of menstruation, the figure below will indicate the date when confinement may be expected, i.e., if date of menstruation is June 1st, confinement may be expected on March 8th, or one day earlier if leap year.

Below is an explanation.—Look at the top line for the date of your period; the number below will show when you can expect to give birth, e.g., if your period starts on June 1st, you can expect to give birth on March 8th, or one day earlier in a leap year.




FOOTNOTES:

[6] For instance, in rabbits one month, in dogs two months, in sheep five months, in cows nine months, in horses eleven months.

[6] For example, rabbits take one month, dogs take two months, sheep take five months, cows take nine months, and horses take eleven months.







Chapter ElevenToC

THE DISORDERS OF PREGNANCY

Smooth Course of Pregnancy in Some Women—Pregnancy and Parturition May be Made Normal Processes Through Education in True Hygiene—Morning Sickness and Its Treatment—Necessity for Medical Advice in Pernicious Vomiting—Anorexia—Bulimia—Aversion Towards Certain Foods—Peculiar Cravings—Tendency to Constipation Aggravated by Pregnancy—Dietary Measures in Constipation—Rectal Injections in Constipation—Laxatives—Cause of Frequent Desire to Urinate During First Two or Three and Last Months of Pregnancy—Treatment of Frequent Urination—Cause of Piles During Pregnancy and Their Treatment—Cause of Itching of External Genitals During Pregnancy and Treatment—Cause of Varicose Veins and Treatment—Liver Spots.

Smooth Course of Pregnancy in Some Women—Pregnancy and Birth Can Be Made Normal Processes Through Education in True Hygiene—Morning Sickness and Its Treatment—Need for Medical Advice in Severe Vomiting—Loss of Appetite—Increased Appetite—Dislike for Certain Foods—Unusual Cravings—Constipation Made Worse by Pregnancy—Dietary Solutions for Constipation—Rectal Injections for Constipation—Laxatives—Frequent Desire to Urinate During the First Two to Three and Last Months of Pregnancy—Treatment for Frequent Urination—Causes of Hemorrhoids During Pregnancy and Their Treatment—Causes of Itching of External Genitals During Pregnancy and Treatment—Causes of Varicose Veins and Treatment—Liver Spots.


We saw that in some women menstruation runs a perfectly smooth course, free from any disagreeable symptoms. The same is true of pregnancy. It is remarkable how smooth and easy the entire course is with some women. Many women know that they are pregnant only because of the non-appearance of the monthly periods; and even in the later months they feel no discomfort, attending to all their work and pleasures as usual; and even childbirth is a trifling matter with them. Unfortunately the number of such women is not very large, and, because [94]of our confined, unnatural, often exhausting way of living, is becoming smaller and smaller. There is no question that the civilized, refined woman has a harder ordeal in pregnancy and childbirth than has her primitive sister. We confidently hope that this will not be so in the future; we expect the time to come when true hygiene will be an integral part of the education and the life of every girl, and then pregnancy and parturition may become even easier processes than they are in the primitive races. But the time is not yet; and in the meantime our young women have a good deal to go through.

We observed that some women experience menstruation without any discomfort. The same applies to pregnancy. It’s impressive how smooth and easy the whole process can be for some women. Many women only realize they’re pregnant because they miss their periods; even in the later months, they feel fine and carry on with their usual activities and joys, and childbirth is a minor event for them. Unfortunately, the number of such women is not very large, and because [94] of our constrained, unnatural, often exhausting lifestyle, that number is getting smaller. There’s no doubt that the refined, modern woman faces a tougher experience during pregnancy and childbirth compared to her primitive counterpart. We sincerely hope that this will change in the future; we anticipate a time when proper hygiene becomes an essential part of every girl’s education and life, making pregnancy and childbirth even easier than they are for primitive peoples. But that time hasn’t arrived yet, and in the meantime, our young women endure a lot.

Morning Sickness. One of the commonest disorders of pregnancy is the so-called morning sickness. This consists in a feeling of nausea and vomiting, which comes on soon after getting up. The morning sickness makes its first appearance in the third, fourth or fifth week of pregnancy and lasts usually until the end of the third or fourth month. In some women, however, the morning sickness comes on in a few days after impregnation has taken place, and those women diagnose their condition unmistakably by the feeling of slight nausea which they experience on getting up. Medicines are as a rule of little use in treating morning sickness. The "disease" can be relieved but not cured. The patient should stay in bed later than usual, should have her [95]breakfast in bed, and then not get up for about half an hour afterward. If the patient is anemic, a good iron preparation may prove useful.

Morning Sickness. One of the most common issues during pregnancy is what we call morning sickness. This involves feeling nauseous and vomiting, which typically happens soon after waking up. Morning sickness usually starts in the third, fourth, or fifth week of pregnancy and typically lasts until the end of the third or fourth month. However, some women may experience morning sickness just a few days after conception, and they can clearly identify their condition by the slight nausea they feel upon getting up. Generally, medications are not very effective in treating morning sickness. The "condition" can be managed but not completely resolved. The patient should sleep in a bit later than usual, have her [95]breakfast in bed, and then remain in bed for about half an hour afterward. If the patient is anemic, a good iron supplement might be helpful.

Pernicious Vomiting. The vomiting of pregnancy sometimes becomes so severe and uncontrollable that it has been given the name pernicious. The patient is unable to retain any kind of food, not even liquids, vomits almost incessantly, and may become very much run down and exhausted. The vomited matter may contain blood. For this condition a competent physician must be consulted, for in some cases the patient's life may be in danger and an abortion has to be performed.

Pernicious Vomiting. The vomiting that occurs during pregnancy can, in some cases, become so severe and uncontrollable that it’s referred to as pernicious. The patient is unable to keep down any food, not even liquids, and experiences almost constant vomiting, which can lead to extreme fatigue and weakness. The vomit may even contain blood. It’s essential to consult a qualified doctor for this condition, as the patient’s life may be at risk, and an abortion might be necessary.

Capricious Appetite. A capricious appetite is very common in pregnancy. The capriciousness may express itself in four different directions: (1) The patient may lose her appetite, almost altogether, partaking only of very little food, and that with effort. This condition of loss of appetite is called anorexia. (2) The patient may develop an enormous appetite—what we call bulimia—eating several times as much as she does ordinarily. (3) She may develop an aversion towards certain articles of food. Thus many women develop an aversion towards meat, the mere sight of or talk about meat causing in them a sensation of nausea. (4) She may show a craving for the most peculiar [96]articles of food and for articles which are not food at all. The craving for sour pickles or sour cabbage is well-known; but some women will eat chalk, sand, and even more peculiar things (for the chalk there may be a reason: the system needs an extra amount of lime and chalk is carbonate of lime).

Capricious Appetite. A fluctuating appetite is very common during pregnancy. This unpredictability can show up in four different ways: (1) The person may lose their appetite almost completely, eating very little food and struggling to do so. This state of reduced appetite is called anorexia. (2) The person may experience an increased appetite—what we call bulimia—eating several times more than usual. (3) They may develop a dislike for certain foods. Many women develop a strong aversion to meat, with just the sight or mention of it causing feelings of nausea. (4) They may have cravings for unusual foods or even non-food items. It's well-known for some to crave sour pickles or sour cabbage; however, some women might eat chalk, sand, and even stranger things (with chalk, there may be a reason: the body needs extra lime, and chalk is made of calcium carbonate).

Constipation. Constipation is very common among women in the non-pregnant condition; but in the pregnant it is much more common and much more aggravated. Constipation must be guarded against, but the measures must be of a mild nature. If we can relieve the constipation by dietary measures alone, so much the better. The dietary measures should consist in eating plenty of fruit—prunes, apples, figs, dates, etc., and coarse bread and bran. Constipating articles, such as cheese or coffee, should be eliminated. Where dietary measures alone are insufficient, the patient should take an enema—a rectal injection—twice or three times a week. The enema should consist of about 8 ounces (half a pint) of cold or lukewarm water containing a pinch of salt, and should be retained about ten minutes. Instead of water, we may advise an occasional enema of two to four drams of glycerin. Or instead of a glycerin enema, a glycerin suppository may be used. If internal laxatives are to be used, only the mildest and non-griping [97]preparations should be employed The best are: a good mineral oil—one or two tablespoonfuls on going to bed, or fluid extract of cascara sagrada, one-half to one teaspoonful on going to bed. It is very important, whatever we use, not to use the same thing for a long time. If the same drug or measure is used without any change, the bowels get used to it and cease to respond and we have to use larger and larger doses. In fighting constipation we must therefore constantly change our weapons: one night we use mineral oil, the next night cascara sagrada, the third night an enema, the fourth night a glycerin injection or suppository, the fifth night perhaps nothing at all, the sixth night a blue mass pill, the seventh morning a Seidlitz powder, then a rest for a day or two, then a repetition of the same measures. But always remember: first try to get along without any drugs at all. Many cases can get relieved of their constipation by a proper change in diet alone. And where this is impossible, then use mild laxatives and use them interchangeably.

Constipation. Constipation is very common among women who are not pregnant, but it’s even more common and more severe during pregnancy. It’s important to prevent constipation, but the methods should be gentle. If we can relieve constipation through dietary changes alone, that’s ideal. The diet should include plenty of fruits—like prunes, apples, figs, dates—and high-fiber foods such as whole grain bread and bran. Foods that can cause constipation, such as cheese and coffee, should be avoided. If dietary changes aren’t enough, the patient should use an enema—a rectal injection—two to three times a week. The enema should be about 8 ounces (half a pint) of cold or lukewarm water with a pinch of salt, held for about ten minutes. Instead of water, we can suggest an occasional glycerin enema of two to four drams. A glycerin suppository can be used instead of a glycerin enema. If internal laxatives are necessary, only the mildest, non-griping [97]preparations should be used. The best options are: a good mineral oil—one or two tablespoons at bedtime, or fluid extract of cascara sagrada, half to one teaspoon at bedtime. It’s crucial not to use the same remedy for a long time. Using the same medication or method consistently can cause the bowels to become accustomed to it and stop responding, forcing us to increase the dosage. In dealing with constipation, we must frequently change our approach: one night we use mineral oil, the next evening cascara sagrada, the third night an enema, the fourth night a glycerin injection or suppository, the fifth night maybe nothing at all, the sixth night a blue mass pill, the seventh morning a Seidlitz powder, then take a break for a day or two before repeating the same methods. But always remember: first, try to manage without any medication at all. Many people can find relief from constipation through dietary changes alone. When that’s not possible, mild laxatives should be used, switching between them.

Toothache is not uncommon in pregnancy, and a pregnant woman should have her teeth put in first-class condition.

Toothache isn't rare during pregnancy, and a pregnant woman should get her teeth in top shape.

Difficulty in Urination. Pregnant women often suffer with frequency and urgency of urination. Some have to urinate, while they are on their feet, [98]every few minutes. This is due to the fact that during the first two or three months of pregnancy the uterus is not only enlarged but is also anteverted, that is turned forward and presses down upon the bladder. When the woman is lying down the pressure on the bladder is relieved, and she does not have to urinate frequently. This pressure lasts only the first two or three months, because after that the growing womb lifts itself out of the pelvis, rising into the abdominal cavity; it is no longer anteverted and the pressure on the bladder is relieved. During the last months of the pregnancy there is again frequent urination, because then the heavy uterus sinks again into the pelvic cavity and presses upon the bladder. The treatment for this frequent urination consists in wearing a well fitting abdominal belt or corset, which raises the uterus and prevents pressure on the bladder. Sometimes a pessary which prevents the anteversion is efficient. In all cases lying down and resting is useful. In short, keeping off one's feet is the most efficient remedy for the treatment of frequent urination in pregnant women.

Difficulty in Urination. Pregnant women often experience frequent and urgent urination. Some find themselves needing to go every few minutes while they're on their feet, [98]. This happens because, during the first two or three months of pregnancy, the uterus not only enlarges but also tilts forward and presses down on the bladder. When a woman lies down, the pressure on the bladder eases, and she doesn’t need to urinate as often. This pressure lasts only for the first two or three months; after that, the growing uterus moves out of the pelvis and into the abdominal cavity, relieving the pressure on the bladder. However, during the last months of pregnancy, frequent urination returns because the heavy uterus sinks back into the pelvic cavity, pressing on the bladder again. The treatment for this frequent urination involves wearing a well-fitting abdominal belt or corset to lift the uterus and prevent pressure on the bladder. Sometimes, using a pessary to stop the tilting is effective. In all cases, lying down and resting is beneficial. In summary, keeping off your feet is the best remedy for frequent urination in pregnant women.

Hemorrhoids (Piles). On account of the pressure of the womb on the rectum, and also on account of the constipation which is so frequent during pregnancy, hemorrhoids or piles are quite frequent [99]among pregnant women. The treatment of hemorrhoids consists in removing the cause: wearing a well-fitting abdominal belt, and relieving the constipation. Injecting into the rectum about half a pint of cold water three times a day is very useful. For the intolerable itching sometimes present in hemorrhoids the following ointment will be found very grateful: menthol, 5 grains; calomel, 10 grains; bismuth subnitrate, 30 grains; resorcin, 10 grains; oil of cade, 15 grains; cold cream, one ounce. The piles (the hemorrhoids) are to be well cleansed with hot water, and this ointment is to be well smeared over; a little is pushed into the rectum, and a piece of cotton is put over the anus. This protects the clothes from soiling and keeps the medicine in place for a longer time. Instead of ointment a cocoa butter suppository may be used. A suppository of the following composition is good: powdered nutgalls, 3 grains; oil of cade, 3 drops; resorcin, 1 grain; bismuth subnitrate, 5 grains; cocoa butter, 20 grains. One such suppository to be inserted three times a day. The ointment and the suppository given above, if used in conjunction with the proper regulation of the bowels, will not only relieve but will cure most cases of hemorrhoids caused by pregnancy.

Hemorrhoids (Piles). Due to the pressure from the uterus on the rectum, as well as the frequent constipation during pregnancy, hemorrhoids or piles are quite common [99] among pregnant women. Treating hemorrhoids involves addressing the underlying causes: wearing a well-fitting abdominal support and relieving constipation. Injecting about half a pint of cold water into the rectum three times a day is very helpful. For the severe itching that can occur with hemorrhoids, the following ointment can provide great relief: menthol, 5 grains; calomel, 10 grains; bismuth subnitrate, 30 grains; resorcin, 10 grains; oil of cade, 15 grains; cold cream, one ounce. Clean the hemorrhoids with hot water, then apply the ointment generously; a bit should be pushed into the rectum, and a piece of cotton should be placed over the anus. This will protect clothing from stains and keep the medication in place longer. Instead of ointment, a cocoa butter suppository can be used. A good suppository consists of: powdered nutgalls, 3 grains; oil of cade, 3 drops; resorcin, 1 grain; bismuth subnitrate, 5 grains; cocoa butter, 20 grains. Insert one suppository three times a day. Using the ointment and suppository as directed, along with proper bowel regulation, will not only relieve but also cure most cases of hemorrhoids caused by pregnancy.

Itching of the Vulva. Pruritus Vulvæ. Itching of the external genitals during pregnancy is not [100]uncommon. This may be due to the fact that the vulva is generally congested and swollen during pregnancy or it may be caused by an increased leucorrheal discharge. The itching is sometimes very severe, and if the patient scratches with her nails and produces bleeding, she may cause an infection of the parts. The patient should be cautioned against scratching; she should try simple measures to relieve the itching. A small towel or gauze compress wrung out of boiling water and applied to the vulva several times a day, followed by a free application of stearate of zinc powder is often efficient. If it is not, the following salve may be tried: carbolic acid, 10 grains; menthol, 5 grains; resorcin, 15 grains; zinc oxide, 1 dram; and white vaseline, one ounce. In very severe cases the vulva should be painted with a solution of silver nitrate, 25 grains to 1 ounce of distilled water.

Itching of the Vulva. Pruritus Vulvæ. Itching of the external genitals during pregnancy is not [100]uncommon. This may be due to the fact that the vulva is generally congested and swollen during pregnancy or it may be caused by an increased discharge. The itching can sometimes be quite intense, and if the patient scratches with her nails and causes bleeding, she may create an infection in the area. The patient should be advised against scratching; she should try simple methods to alleviate the itching. A small towel or gauze compress soaked in boiling water and applied to the vulva several times a day, followed by a generous application of zinc stearate powder, is often effective. If that doesn’t help, the following salve may be tried: carbolic acid, 10 grains; menthol, 5 grains; resorcin, 15 grains; zinc oxide, 1 dram; and white vaseline, one ounce. In very severe cases, the vulva should be treated with a solution of silver nitrate, 25 grains to 1 ounce of distilled water.

Varicose Veins. In most women during pregnancy the veins in the legs become somewhat enlarged. This is due to the pressure of the womb, which interferes with the circulation. If the veins become very prominent, swollen and tortuous, they are called varicose. This condition should be prevented, because it often and to some degree always persists permanently even after the pregnancy is over. The best precautionary measure is for the [101]woman to wear a well-fitting abdominal belt or maternity corset, which supports the womb and does not permit it to sink too low into the pelvis. If varicose veins have been permitted to develop, the woman should wear well-fitting rubber stockings, or at least have the legs bandaged with woven elastic bandages. The bandage must be applied by a competent person, uniformly and not too tightly. Constipation has also a bad effect in making varicose veins worse; the bowels should therefore also be looked after. In some severe cases all measures are of little value unless the patient at the same time stays in bed or on a couch for a few days, with the legs elevated.

Varicose Veins. During pregnancy, many women experience some enlargement of the veins in their legs. This happens because the pressure from the womb disrupts circulation. When the veins become very noticeable, swollen, and twisted, they are referred to as varicose. This condition should be prevented, as it often persists to some extent even after pregnancy. The best preventive measure is for the [101]woman to wear a well-fitting abdominal belt or maternity corset, which supports the womb and helps keep it from sinking too low into the pelvis. If varicose veins do develop, the woman should wear well-fitting compression stockings or at least have her legs wrapped with elastic bandages. The bandage should be applied by someone skilled, evenly, and not too tightly. Constipation can also worsen varicose veins; therefore, attention to bowel health is important. In some severe cases, all these measures may be ineffective unless the patient also rests in bed or on a couch for a few days with her legs elevated.

Swelling of the feet should be at once attended to. It may be a trifling matter due only to pressure of the womb; then again it may be due to some kidney trouble. The physician will determine the true cause and prescribe the appropriate treatment.

Swelling in the feet should be addressed right away. It could be a minor issue from pressure caused by the womb, or it might be related to some kidney problem. A doctor will figure out the real cause and recommend the right treatment.

Liver Spots. Chloasma. In some cases irregular brownish patches or splotches develop on the skin around the breasts, on the sides, or on the face. These patches are known popularly as liver spots or in medical language as chloasma. Nothing can be done for them, but they generally disappear after the pregnancy is over. A few patches here and there may remain permanently.

Liver Spots. Chloasma. Sometimes, uneven brownish patches or spots appear on the skin around the breasts, on the sides, or on the face. These patches are commonly called liver spots or, in medical terms, chloasma. While there's not much that can be done about them, they usually fade away after pregnancy ends. However, a few patches might stay permanently.







Chapter TwelveToC

WHEN TO ENGAGE A PHYSICIAN

Necessity for the Pregnant Woman Immediately Placing Herself Under Care of Physician and Remaining Under His Care During Entire Period.

Necessity for the Pregnant Woman to Immediately Consult a Physician and Stay Under Their Care Throughout the Entire Period.


The disorders and disturbances described above are, with the exception of pernicious vomiting, of a minor nature. They are annoying, may cause considerable discomfort and suffering, but they do not endanger the life of the woman or of the child. Occasionally, however, fortunately not very often, the kidneys become affected, and for this condition treatment by a physician is absolutely necessary. In fact, the correct and safe thing for a woman to do is to consult a physician as soon as she knows she is pregnant, and have him take care of her during the entire pregnancy. Some women engage a physician during the eighth or ninth month and this is decidedly wrong, because it may then be too late to correct certain troubles which if taken at the outset could have been easily cured; while many troubles in the hands of a competent physician can be prevented altogether. I must therefore reiterate: [103]every woman should engage a physician from the beginning of her pregnancy, or at least during the third or fourth and certainly not later than the fifth month. He will examine the urine every month and make sure that the kidneys are in order, he will make sure that the child is in a normal position, and will prevent a host of other ills.

The disorders and issues mentioned above, except for severe vomiting, are generally minor. They can be bothersome and may cause significant discomfort and suffering, but they aren't life-threatening for the woman or the child. However, sometimes—thankfully, not very often—the kidneys may be affected, and for this situation, it's essential to see a doctor. In fact, the best approach for a woman is to consult a physician as soon as she finds out she’s pregnant and have them manage her care throughout the entire pregnancy. Some women wait until the eighth or ninth month to find a doctor, which is definitely a mistake because it might be too late to address certain problems that could have been easily resolved earlier; while many issues can be completely prevented with a qualified physician's help. Therefore, I must emphasize: [103]every woman should see a physician from the start of her pregnancy, or at least during the third or fourth month, and definitely no later than the fifth month. The doctor will check the urine monthly, ensure the kidneys are functioning properly, confirm the baby is in the right position, and prevent many other potential issues.

Position of the Child in the Womb.

Position of the Child in the Womb.

Position of the Baby in the Womb.

This is not a special treatise on the management of pregnancy, and therefore minute details are out of place. Besides, to the details the physician will attend. But some hints regarding diet and general hygiene will prove useful.

This is not a specialized guide on managing pregnancy, so in-depth details are unnecessary. The physician will handle those specifics. However, some tips on diet and overall hygiene will be helpful.

If everything is satisfactory, if there is no severe vomiting, kidney trouble, etc., the usual mixed diet may continue. The only changes I would make are the following: Drink plenty of hot water during entire course of pregnancy: a glass or two in the morning, two or three glasses in the afternoon, the same at night. From six to twelve glasses may be consumed. Also plenty of milk, buttermilk and fermented milk. Plenty of fruit and vegetables. Meat only once a day. For the tendency to constipation, whole wheat bread, rye bread, bread baked of bran or bran with cream.

If everything is good, and there’s no severe vomiting, kidney issues, etc., you can continue the usual mixed diet. The only changes I’d suggest are the following: Drink lots of hot water throughout your entire pregnancy—about a glass or two in the morning, two or three glasses in the afternoon, and the same at night. You can have between six to twelve glasses in total. Also, make sure to have plenty of milk, buttermilk, and fermented milk. Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Limit meat to once a day. For constipation, include whole wheat bread, rye bread, and bran or bran with cream.

[104]As to exercise, either extreme must be avoided. Some women think that as soon as they become pregnant, they must not move a muscle; they are to be put in a glass case, and kept there to the day of delivery. Other women, on the other hand, of the ultramodern type, indulge in strenuous exercise and go out on long fatiguing walks up to the last day. Either extreme is injurious. The right way is moderate exercise, and short, non-fatiguing walks.

[104]When it comes to exercise, it's important to avoid both extremes. Some women believe that once they get pregnant, they shouldn’t move at all; they think they should be put in a glass case and kept there until delivery. On the other hand, there are women who take a more modern approach and engage in intense workouts and long, exhausting walks right up until the end. Both extremes can be harmful. The best approach is to engage in moderate exercise and take short, non-fatiguing walks.

Bathing may be kept up to the day of delivery. But warm baths, particularly during the last two or three months, are preferable to cold baths.

Bathing can continue up until the day of delivery. However, warm baths, especially in the last two or three months, are better than cold baths.







Chapter ThirteenToC

THE SIZE OF THE FETUS

Approximately Correct Measurements and Weight of Fetus at End of Each Month of Pregnancy.

Approximately Correct Measurements and Weight of Fetus at End of Each Month of Pregnancy.


Men and women are always interested to know how large the fetus is and how far it is developed during the various months of pregnancy. Absolutely exact measurements cannot be given, but the following approximate measurements are correct:

Men and women are always curious about the size of the fetus and how developed it is during the different months of pregnancy. While precise measurements can't be provided, the following approximate measurements are accurate:

Embryo Growth.

1. Embryo Between One and Two Weeks Old.
2. Embryo About Four Weeks Old.
3. Embryo About Six Weeks Old.

1. Embryo Aged One to Two Weeks.
2. Embryo Approximately Four Weeks Old.
3. Embryo Approximately Six Weeks Old.

At the end of the first month (lunar) it is about [106]the size of a hazelnut. Weighs about 15 grains.

At the end of the first lunar month, it is about [106] the size of a hazelnut and weighs around 15 grains.

At the end of the second month it is the size of a small hen's egg. The internal organs are partially formed, it begins to assume a human shape, but the sex cannot yet be differentiated. Up to the fifth or sixth week it does not differ much in appearance from the embryos of other animals.

At the end of the second month, it’s about the size of a small hen’s egg. The internal organs are partially formed, and it starts to take on a human shape, but the sex can’t be identified yet. Until around the fifth or sixth week, it doesn’t look much different from the embryos of other animals.

At the end of the third month it is the size of a large goose egg; it is about two to three and a half inches long. Weighs about one ounce.

At the end of the third month, it’s the size of a large goose egg; it measures about two to three and a half inches long and weighs around one ounce.

At the end of the fourth month the fetus is between six and seven inches long and weighs about five ounces.

At the end of the fourth month, the fetus is about six to seven inches long and weighs around five ounces.

At the end of the fifth month the fetus is between seven and eleven inches long, and weighs eight to ten ounces.

At the end of the fifth month, the fetus is between seven and eleven inches long and weighs eight to ten ounces.

At the end of the sixth month it is eleven to thirteen inches long and weighs one and one-half to two pounds. If born, is capable of living a few minutes, and it is reported that some six months' children have been incubated.

At the end of the sixth month, it measures eleven to thirteen inches long and weighs one and a half to two pounds. If born, it can survive for a few minutes, and it's been reported that some six-month-old babies have been successfully incubated.

At the end of the seventh month the fetus is from thirteen to fifteen or sixteen inches long and weighs about three pounds. Is capable of independent life, but must be brought up with great care, usually in an incubator.

At the end of the seventh month, the fetus is between thirteen and sixteen inches long and weighs about three pounds. It can survive on its own but needs to be cared for very carefully, usually in an incubator.

At the end of the eighth month the length is [107]from fifteen to seventeen inches, and weight from three to five pounds.

At the end of the eighth month, the length is [107] from fifteen to seventeen inches, and the weight ranges from three to five pounds.

At the end of the ninth month the length of the fetus is from sixteen to seventeen and one-half inches, and weight from five to seven pounds.

At the end of the ninth month, the fetus measures between sixteen and seventeen and a half inches long and weighs between five and seven pounds.

At the end of the tenth lunar month (at birth) the length of the child is from seventeen to nineteen inches and the weight from six to twelve pounds; the average is seven and a quarter, but there are full term children weighing less than six pounds and more than twelve; but these are exceptions.

At the end of the tenth lunar month (at birth), the child's length is between seventeen and nineteen inches, and the weight ranges from six to twelve pounds; the average weight is seven and a quarter pounds. However, there are full-term babies who weigh less than six pounds and more than twelve; these cases are exceptions.







Chapter FourteenToC

THE AFTERBIRTH (PLACENTA) AND CORD

How the Afterbirth Develops—Bag of Waters—Umbilical Cord—The Navel—Fetus Nourished by Absorption—Fetus Breathes by Aid of Placenta—No Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child.

How the Afterbirth Develops—Amniotic Sac—Umbilical Cord—The Belly Button—Fetus Nourished by Absorption—Fetus Breathes with Help from the Placenta—No Nerve Connection Between Mother and Child.


Whatever part of the womb the ovum attaches itself to is stimulated to intense activity, to growth. Numerous bloodvessels begin to grow and that part of the lining membrane with its numerous bloodvessels constitute the placenta, or as it is commonly called afterbirth, because it comes out after the birth of the child. From the placenta there is also reflected a membrane over the ovum, so as to give it additional protection. That membrane forms a complete bag over the fetus; this bag becomes filled with liquid, so that the fetus floats freely in a bag of waters; this bag bursts only during childbirth. The fetus is not attached close to the placenta, but is, so to say, suspended from it by a cord, which is called the umbilical cord. When the child is born, the umbilical cord is cut, and the scar or depression in the abdomen where the umbilical cord was [109]attached constitutes the navel or umbilicus (in slang language—button or belly button). The umbilical cord consists of two arteries and one vein embedded in a gelatin like substance and enveloped by a membrane, and it is through the umbilical cord that the blood from the placenta is brought to and carried from the fetus. The blood of the fetus and the blood of the mother do not mix; the bloodvessels are separated by thin walls, and it is through these thin walls that the fetal blood receives the ingredients it needs from the mother's blood. In other words, it receives its nourishment from the mother by absorption or osmosis. The blood from the placenta also furnishes the fetal blood with oxygen, so that the fetus breathes by the aid of the placenta, and not through its own lungs.

Whatever part of the womb the egg attaches to is stimulated to go into intense activity and growth. A lot of blood vessels begin to form, and that area of the lining with its many blood vessels becomes the placenta, commonly referred to as the afterbirth, because it is expelled after the birth of the child. There's also a membrane that develops over the egg, offering additional protection. This membrane creates a complete bag around the fetus; it fills with fluid, allowing the fetus to float freely in a sac of water, which only breaks during childbirth. The fetus is not directly attached to the placenta but is suspended from it by a cord known as the umbilical cord. When the baby is born, the umbilical cord is cut, leaving a scar or indentation on the abdomen where it was [109]attached, which is called the navel or umbilicus (informally known as the button or belly button). The umbilical cord is made up of two arteries and one vein surrounded by a gelatin-like substance and covered by a membrane. It’s through the umbilical cord that blood from the placenta is delivered to and taken from the fetus. The blood of the fetus and the mother remains separate; the blood vessels are divided by thin walls, and it's through these walls that the fetal blood gets the nutrients it needs from the mother’s blood. In other words, it gets nourishment from the mother through absorption or osmosis. The placenta also supplies oxygen to the fetal blood, so the fetus breathes with the help of the placenta rather than through its own lungs.

It is well to remember that there is absolutely no nervous connection between mother and child. There are no nerves whatever in the umbilical cord, so that the nervous systems of the fetus and of the mother are entirely distinct and separate. And this will explain why certain nervous impressions and shocks received by the mother are not readily transmitted to the child. It is only through changes in the mother's blood that the fetus can be influenced. As will be seen in a later chapter we are skeptical about "maternal impressions."

It’s important to understand that there is no nervous connection between mother and child. The umbilical cord has no nerves, so the nervous systems of the fetus and the mother are completely separate. This explains why certain nervous experiences and shocks that the mother goes through aren’t easily passed on to the child. The fetus can only be affected by changes in the mother’s blood. As will be discussed in a later chapter, we are doubtful about "maternal impressions."







Chapter FifteenToC

LACTATION OR NURSING

No Perfect Substitute for Mother's Milk—When Nursing is Injurious to Mother and Child—Modified Milk—Artificial Foods—Care Essential in Selecting Wet Nurse—Suckling Child Benefits Mother—Reciprocal Affection Strengthened by Nursing—Sexual Feelings While Nursing—Alcoholics are Injurious—Attention to Condition of Nipples During Pregnancy Essential—Treatment of Sunken Nipples—Treatment of Tender Nipples—Treatment of Cracked Nipples—How to Stop the Secretion of Milk When Necessary—Menstruation While Nursing—Pregnancy in the Nursing Woman.

No Perfect Substitute for Mother's Milk—When Nursing is Injurious to Mother and Child—Modified Milk—Artificial Foods—Care Essential in Selecting Wet Nurse—Suckling Child Benefits Mother—Reciprocal Affection Strengthened by Nursing—Sexual Feelings While Nursing—Alcoholics are Injurious—Attention to Condition of Nipples During Pregnancy Essential—Treatment of Sunken Nipples—Treatment of Tender Nipples—Treatment of Cracked Nipples—How to Stop the Secretion of Milk When Necessary—Menstruation While Nursing—Pregnancy in the Nursing Woman.


Every mother should nurse her child—if she can. There is no perfect substitute for mother's milk. There is only one excuse for a mother not nursing—that is when she has no milk, or when the quality of the milk is so poor that the child does not thrive on it, or when the mother is run down, is threatened with or is suffering with tuberculosis, etc. In such cases the nursing would prove injurious to both mother and child.

Every mother should breastfeed her child—if she’s able to. There's no perfect substitute for breast milk. The only reason a mother shouldn’t breastfeed is if she doesn’t have milk, if the quality of her milk is too poor for the child to thrive, or if she’s too exhausted, at risk of, or suffering from tuberculosis, etc. In those situations, breastfeeding could be harmful to both the mother and the child.

When the mother cannot nurse the child, it should be brought up artificially on modified cow's milk. Formulas for modified milk have been worked out for every month of the child's life, and if the formulas are carefully followed, and the bottle and [111]nipples are properly sterilized, the child should have no trouble, but should thrive and grow like on good mother's milk. If the child is sickly or delicate and does not thrive on modified cow's milk or on the other artificial foods, such as Horlick's malted milk, or Nestlé's food, then a wet nurse may become necessary. But before engaging a wet nurse great care should be taken to make sure that she is healthy, that the age of her child is approximately the same as the age of the child which she is about to nurse, and particularly that she is free from any syphilitic taint. One, two or more Wassermann tests should be made to settle the question definitely.

When the mother can't breastfeed, the baby should be raised on modified cow's milk. There are formulas for modified milk designed for every month of the baby's life, and if these formulas are followed carefully, and the bottle and [111] nipples are properly sterilized, the baby should thrive just like on good mother’s milk. If the baby is weak or delicate and doesn’t do well on modified cow's milk or other artificial foods like Horlick's malted milk or Nestlé's food, then hiring a wet nurse might be necessary. However, before choosing a wet nurse, it’s important to ensure that she is healthy, that her child's age is similar to the baby she will nurse, and especially that she has no syphilis. One or more Wassermann tests should be conducted to confirm this.

Mothers should bear in mind that suckling the child is good not only for the child, but for the mother as well. Lactation helps the involution of the uterus: the uterus of a nursing mother returns more quickly and more perfectly to its normal ante-pregnant condition than the uterus of the mother who cannot or will not nurse her child.

Mothers should remember that breastfeeding is beneficial not just for the baby, but for the mother too. Nursing helps the uterus shrink back down: a breastfeeding mom's uterus returns to its normal pre-pregnancy state faster and more effectively than that of a mother who can’t or chooses not to breastfeed.

It is asserted that the reciprocal affection between mother and child is greater in cases in which the child suckled its mother's breast. This is quite likely. It is also asserted that the nursing mother transmits certain traits to its child, which the non-nursing mother cannot. This is merely a hypothesis without any scientific proof.

It is said that the mutual love between a mother and child is stronger when the child is breastfed. This seems likely. It's also suggested that breastfeeding mothers pass on certain traits to their children that non-breastfeeding mothers do not. This is just a theory without any scientific evidence.

[112]On the other hand, the statement that many women experience decidedly pleasurable sexual feelings while nursing seems to be well substantiated.

[112]On the other hand, it's clear that many women feel very pleasurable sensations during nursing.

That the mother who nurses her child should partake of sufficient nourishment goes without saying. But the advice often given to nursing mothers to partake of beer, ale or wine is a bad one. It is a question if a mother partaking of considerable quantities of alcoholic beverages may not transmit the taste for alcohol to her children. No, alcoholics should be left alone, but milk, eggs, meat, fruit and vegetables should be partaken of in abundance.

That a mother who breastfeeds her child should get enough nutrition is obvious. However, the common advice given to nursing mothers to drink beer, ale, or wine is misguided. It's questionable whether a mother consuming large amounts of alcoholic beverages might pass on a taste for alcohol to her children. No, alcohol should be avoided, and instead, mothers should eat plenty of milk, eggs, meat, fruits, and vegetables.

Preparing the Nipples. For the infant to be able to nurse properly the nipples of the breast must be in good condition. If the nipples are sunken, depressed, it is torture for the child to nurse. It uses up a lot of energy uselessly, becomes exhausted, and gets very little milk; while if the nipples be tender or cracked the process of nursing is a torture for the mother.

Preparing the Nipples. For the baby to nurse properly, the nipples need to be in good shape. If the nipples are inverted or flat, it's difficult for the baby to latch on. This wastes a lot of the baby's energy, leaving them tired and getting very little milk. On the other hand, if the nipples are sore or cracked, nursing becomes painful for the mother.

It is therefore necessary to attend to the nipples in due time—to begin at the fifth or sixth month is not too early. If the nipples are sufficiently prominent, little need be done for them except to wash them with a little boric acid solution (one teaspoonful of boric acid to a glass of water) occasionally, and now and then to rub in a little petrolatum, plain [113]or borated. But if the nipples are sunken so that they are below the surface of the breast, or if they are only slightly above the surface of the breast, they must be treated. Gentle traction must be made on them with the fingers three or four times a day. There are only a few cases where persistent manipulation will not develop the nipple and make it stand out prominently.

It’s important to take care of the nipples in a timely manner—starting at the fifth or sixth month isn't too early. If the nipples are sufficiently prominent, you only need to wash them occasionally with a boric acid solution (one teaspoon of boric acid in a glass of water) and sometimes apply a little petrolatum, either plain [113] or borated. However, if the nipples are retracted so that they are below the surface of the breast, or only slightly above it, they need treatment. Gently pull on them with your fingers three or four times a day. There are only a few cases where consistent manipulation won't help develop the nipple and make it stand out prominently.

If the nipple is tender it should be washed two or three times a day with a mixture of alcohol and water; one part of alcohol to three parts of water is sufficient. In washing the nipple with this diluted alcohol it should be dried and a little petrolatum or vaseline rubbed in. This done two or three times a day during the last month or two of the pregnancy will generally produce a good healthy nipple.

If the nipple is sensitive, it should be washed two or three times a day with a mix of alcohol and water; one part alcohol to three parts water is enough. When washing the nipple with this diluted alcohol, it should be dried, and a little petroleum jelly or Vaseline should be applied. Doing this two or three times a day during the last month or two of pregnancy will usually result in a healthy nipple.

The Treatment of Cracked Nipples. If the care of the nipple has been neglected, and it develops cracks or fissures so that the nursing of the child causes the mother severe pain, the nursing should be done through a nipple shield, and in the meantime between the nursings the nipple should be rubbed with the following preparation, which is excellent and which I can fully recommend: thymol iodide, ½ dram; olive oil, ½ ounce. This should be applied every hour to the nipple and covered with a little cotton; before each nursing, however, it must be [114]well washed off with warm water or warm boric acid solution. When the nipples are cracked, the infant's lips should also before nursing be carefully wiped out with boric acid solution. For the baby's mouth contains bacteria which while harmless in themselves may if they get into the cracks of the nipple set up an inflammation of the breast or "mastitis" and cause an abscess. If the cracks are excruciatingly painful, as they sometimes are, it is necessary to give the one breast a rest for twenty-four hours and have the child nurse at the other until the cracks have partially healed.

The Treatment of Cracked Nipples. If the nipple care has been neglected, and it develops cracks or splits that make nursing extremely painful for the mother, she should use a nipple shield during feedings. In between nursing sessions, the nipple should be treated with the following excellent preparation, which I highly recommend: thymol iodide, ½ dram; olive oil, ½ ounce. This mixture should be applied every hour to the nipple and covered with a small amount of cotton. However, before each nursing, it must be [114] thoroughly washed off with warm water or a warm boric acid solution. When the nipples are cracked, the baby's lips should also be carefully wiped with boric acid solution before nursing. This is important because the baby’s mouth contains bacteria that, while harmless on their own, could enter the nipple cracks and cause breast inflammation or "mastitis," leading to an abscess. If the cracks are extremely painful, as they sometimes can be, it’s necessary to rest one breast for twenty-four hours while the baby nurses from the other side until the cracks have started to heal.

When It Is Necessary to Dry Up the Breasts. In case of the death of the child, or if the mother for some other reason finds herself unable to nurse, such as in cases where there is absolutely no nipple, instead of the prominence of the nipple there being a deep depression, it becomes necessary to stop the secretion of the milk, or as it is said in common parlance, "to dry up the breasts." In former days, not so very long ago, and the practice is still common enough to call attention to it and to condemn it, the breasts used to be tightly bandaged, or they used to be pumped every few hours. The first causes unnecessary pain and trouble, while the second procedure, the pumping, does exactly the reverse to what it is intended to do. Instead of [115]drying up the breasts it keeps up the secretion. The best thing to do in a case like that is to leave the breasts alone, not to pump them, but just gently support them with a bandage and then in three or four days the secretion of the milk will gradually disappear. There is some discomfort the first twenty-four or forty-eight hours, but if left alone the discomfort is less than if the breasts are manipulated, bandaged or pumped.

When It Is Necessary to Dry Up the Breasts. If a child dies or if the mother cannot nurse for some other reason, such as having no nipple, where there is instead a deep depression, it becomes necessary to stop the milk production, commonly referred to as "drying up the breasts." Not too long ago, and still a practice that raises concern, breasts were often tightly bandaged or pumped every few hours. The former causes unnecessary pain and hassle, while the latter does the opposite of its intended purpose. Instead of [115]drying up the breasts, it maintains milk production. The best approach in such cases is to leave the breasts alone, avoid pumping, and gently support them with a bandage. Within three or four days, milk production will gradually cease. There may be some discomfort during the first twenty-four to forty-eight hours, but if left alone, the discomfort is less than when the breasts are manipulated, bandaged, or pumped.

Menstruation or Pregnancy While Nursing. Many women do not menstruate and do not become pregnant while they are nursing. Some women will not conceive, no matter how long they may nurse the child—a year or two or longer. And some women take advantage of this fact, and in order to avoid another child they will keep up the nursing as long as possible. In Egypt and other Oriental countries where our means for the prevention of conception are unknown, it is no rare sight to see a child three or four years old interrupting his work or his play and running up to suckle his mother's breast. But not all women have this good luck. Some women (about fifty per cent.) begin to menstruate in the sixth month of lactation, while some become pregnant even before they begin to menstruate. It only too often happens that a woman considering lactation her safeguard omits to use any precautions [116]and finds herself, to her great discomfiture, in a pregnant condition.

Menstruation or Pregnancy While Nursing. Many women don’t menstruate and don’t get pregnant while they’re nursing. Some women won’t conceive, no matter how long they nurse their child—whether it's a year, two years, or even longer. Some women take advantage of this and nurse as long as possible to avoid having another child. In Egypt and other Eastern countries where contraception is not commonly practiced, it’s not unusual to see a child three or four years old stop what he’s doing to nurse from his mother. However, not all women are so fortunate. About fifty percent of women start menstruating in the sixth month of breastfeeding, while some become pregnant even before their periods return. Unfortunately, it often happens that a woman thinks breastfeeding is a reliable method of birth control, doesn't take any precautions [116], and finds herself unexpectedly pregnant.

When a nursing woman discovers that she is pregnant she should give up nursing at once. The milk is apt to become of poor quality, but even where this is not the case, it is too much for a woman to feed one child in the uterus and one at the breast.

When a nursing woman finds out that she is pregnant, she should stop nursing immediately. The milk may become poor quality, and even if that isn't the case, it's too much for a woman to nourish one child in the womb and another at the breast.







Chapter SixteenToC

ABORTION AND MISCARRIAGE

Definition of Word Abortion—Definition of Word Miscarriage—Spontaneous Abortion—Induced Abortion—Therapeutic Abortion—Criminal Abortion—Missed Abortion—Habitual Abortion—Syphilis as Cause of Abortion and Miscarriage—Dangers of Abortion—Abortion an Evil.

Definition of Word Abortion—Definition of Word Miscarriage—Spontaneous Abortion—Induced Abortion—Therapeutic Abortion—Criminal Abortion—Missed Abortion—Habitual Abortion—Syphilis as a Cause of Abortion and Miscarriage—Dangers of Abortion—Abortion is Harmful.


The word abortion, used somewhat loosely, signifies the premature expulsion of the fetus; the expulsion of the fetus from the womb before it is viable, i.e., before it is capable of living independently. Used in a stricter sense, the word abortion is applied to the expulsion of the fetus up to the end of the 16th week; to the expulsion of the fetus between the 16th and the 28th week the term miscarriage is applied; and when the expulsion of the fetus takes place after the 28th week, but before full term, we use the term premature labor. The laity does not like the term abortion, as it is under the impression that the term always signifies criminal abortion; it therefore prefers to use the term miscarriage ("miss"), regardless of the time at which the expulsion of the fetus takes place.

The term abortion, used a bit loosely, refers to the early removal of the fetus; the removal of the fetus from the womb before it can survive on its own. In a more specific sense, abortion refers to the removal of the fetus up to the end of the 16th week; for the removal of the fetus between the 16th and 28th week, the term miscarriage is used; and when the removal of the fetus occurs after the 28th week but before the full term, we call it premature labor. Many people dislike the term abortion because they associate it mainly with illegal procedures; they prefer to say miscarriage ("miss") no matter when the fetus is expelled.

[118]When an abortion (or miscarriage) takes place by itself, without any outside aid, we call it spontaneous abortion. When it is brought on by artificial means, whether by the woman herself or by somebody else, we call it induced abortion. When an abortion is induced for the purpose of saving the woman's life, we call it therapeutic abortion; this is considered perfectly legal and proper. But where an abortion is induced merely to save an unmarried mother's reputation, or because the married mother is too poor or too weak to have any more children, or is reluctant to have any (or any more) for any other reason, it is called criminal or illegal abortion, and, if discovered, subjects the mother and the person who produced the abortion to severe punishment.

[118]When an abortion (or miscarriage) happens naturally, without any outside intervention, we refer to it as spontaneous abortion. When it’s triggered by artificial methods, whether by the woman herself or someone else, we call it induced abortion. If an abortion is done to save the woman's life, we refer to it as therapeutic abortion; this is seen as completely legal and appropriate. However, when an abortion is induced simply to protect an unmarried mother's reputation, or because a married mother is too poor or unable to have more children, or is unwilling to have any (or more) for various reasons, it is classified as criminal or illegal abortion, and if discovered, both the mother and the person who facilitated the abortion face serious penalties.

When the fetus for some reason dies in its mother's womb, it is generally expelled within a few hours or days. Sometimes this is not the case, and the dead fetus is retained for several weeks, or months or even years; to such a phenomenon we apply the term missed abortion. Some women suffer from what might be called the abortion habit; they can hardly ever carry a child to full term, but lose it in the same month or even in the same week of gestation during each pregnancy; we call this habitual abortion. And this habitual abortion may [119]be independent of disease, such, for instance, as syphilis. The terms threatened, imminent and inevitable abortion require no further explanation.

When a fetus dies for any reason in its mother's womb, it usually gets expelled within a few hours or days. However, sometimes it doesn’t happen right away, and the deceased fetus can be retained for several weeks, months, or even years; this situation is referred to as a missed abortion. Some women experience what could be called habitual miscarriage; they can rarely carry a pregnancy to full term, often losing it within the same month or even the same week during each pregnancy; this is known as habitual abortion. Additionally, habitual abortion may [119] occur without any disease, such as syphilis. The terms threatened, imminent, and inevitable abortion need no further explanation.

The Causes of Abortion. Outside of the abortion habit, which may be due partly to heredity or be caused by a diseased condition of the lining membrane of the uterus, the principal cause of abortion and miscarriage is syphilis. And when a woman has had two or three or four or more miscarriages in succession we generally assume the cause to be syphilis, and in most cases the assumption will be correct.

The Causes of Abortion. Apart from the habit of having abortions, which may be linked to genetics or caused by a health issue with the lining of the uterus, the main reason for abortion and miscarriage is syphilis. When a woman experiences two, three, four, or more miscarriages in a row, we typically suspect that syphilis is the cause, and in most cases, that's the right assumption.

When an abortion is performed by an experienced physician, with the observance of the utmost cleanliness (asepsis and antisepsis), then the abortion is accompanied with very little or no danger; but when performed carelessly, by incompetent, non-conscientious physicians and midwives, the operation is fraught with great danger to the patient's health or to her very life. And abortion is a great cause of premature death and chronic invalidism among women. And as long as the people will remain ignorant of the proper means of regulating their offspring, so long will abortion thrive.

When an abortion is performed by an experienced doctor, with the highest standards of cleanliness (asepsis and antisepsis), the procedure comes with very little or no risk. However, when it’s done carelessly by unqualified, negligent doctors or midwives, it carries significant risks to the patient’s health or even her life. Abortion is a major cause of premature death and long-term disabilities among women. As long as people remain unaware of the proper ways to manage their reproductive choices, abortion will continue to be prevalent.

While I recognize that there are cases in which the performance of an abortion is perfectly justifiable from a moral standpoint, for instance in cases [120]of rape or where the mother is unmarried, nevertheless abortion must be recognized as an evil, a necessary evil now and then, but an evil, nevertheless. It is never to be undertaken lightly, or to be considered in a frivolous spirit; and it is the duty of all serious-minded and humanitarian men and women to do everything in their power to remove those conditions which make abortion necessary and unavoidable.

While I understand that there are situations where having an abortion is morally justifiable, such as in cases [120] of rape or when the mother is unmarried, we still have to acknowledge that abortion is an evil—though sometimes a necessary one. It should never be taken lightly or treated casually, and it's the responsibility of all thoughtful and compassionate people to do everything they can to eliminate the circumstances that make abortion necessary and unavoidable.







Chapter SeventeenToC

PRENATAL CARE

Meaning of the Term—Misleading Information by Quasi-Scientists—Exaggerated Ideas Regarding Prenatal Care—Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child—Cases Under Author's Observation—Effects on Offspring—Advice to Pregnant Women—Germ-plasm of Chronic Alcoholic—A Glass of Wine and the Spermatozoa—False Statements—Cases of Violence and Accidents During Pregnancy.

Meaning of the Term—Misleading Information by Quasi-Scientists—Exaggerated Ideas About Prenatal Care—Nervous Connection Between Mother and Child—Cases Under Author's Observation—Effects on Offspring—Advice to Pregnant Women—Germ-plasm of Chronic Alcoholic—A Glass of Wine and the Spermatozoa—False Statements—Cases of Violence and Accidents During Pregnancy.


By prenatal care we understand the care taken during pregnancy before the child is born. Used in a wider sense the term includes the care which both parents should take of themselves even before the child is conceived.

By prenatal care, we mean the care given during pregnancy before the child is born. In a broader sense, the term includes the attention both parents should give to themselves even before the child is conceived.

Of course the father and the mother should be in the best possible physical and mental condition during the time of conception and even before conception, and the mother should take the very best care of herself—she should be in good health and as calm a spirit as possible during the entire period of gestation. For the general health and condition of the mother does influence the child.

Of course, both parents should be in the best possible physical and mental shape during conception and even before it. The mother should take excellent care of herself—she should be healthy and maintain as calm a mindset as possible throughout the entire pregnancy. The overall health and well-being of the mother do impact the child.

And still I feel impelled to say something which may meet with violent opposition in some quarters. [122]The trouble is, there are too many half-baked scientists in our midst. They spread misleading information and the public at large is too apt to take every statement that has a quasi-scientific seal for something absolute, for something positive, for something that admits of no exceptions.

And yet, I feel the need to say something that might face strong backlash from some people. [122]The problem is, there are too many unqualified scientists around us. They share misleading information, and the general public tends to accept every statement that seems somewhat scientific as if it’s absolute, definite, and without exceptions.

I have seen so much misery caused by wrong prenatal care teaching and by the foolish, exaggerated ideas on the subject, that I consider it my duty to say something in order to counteract those erroneous notions. I consider it my special mission to destroy error, mysticism and superstition. And the prenatal care teaching as imparted by some unfortunately partakes of all three of the above.

I have witnessed a lot of suffering caused by poor prenatal care education and by the silly, exaggerated beliefs about it, so I feel it's my responsibility to speak out against those mistaken ideas. I see it as my mission to eliminate error, mysticism, and superstition. Unfortunately, the prenatal care education given by some incorporates all three of these issues.

Of course, I repeat, the mother should try to be in the best possible condition while she is carrying the child. Nevertheless, it is foolish to imagine if the mother is not quite well, or is worried about something, or has a fit of anger, that it is invariably going to be reflected on the child. The child, as we know, has no nervous connection whatever with the mother, and it is only very violent or prolonged shocks that are apt to have an injurious influence.

Of course, I repeat, the mother should try to be in the best possible condition while she is carrying the child. However, it's misguided to think that if the mother isn’t feeling well, is stressed about something, or experiences a fit of anger, it will always negatively affect the child. The child, as we know, has no direct nervous connection with the mother, and only very intense or prolonged shocks are likely to have a harmful impact.

I know of children that were carried by their mothers in anger and in anguish from the day of conception to the day of delivery. And still they were born perfectly normal. I know of a child whose [123]mother was suffering the most hellish tortures of jealousy during the entire period of pregnancy, and still the child was born perfectly healthy, perfectly normal, and is now a splendid specimen of manhood. I know children whose mothers went through severe attacks of pneumonia, typhoid fever, etc., and still they were born perfectly healthy and perfectly normal. I know children whose mothers were using every means to abort them, took all kinds of internal medicines until they were deathly sick, and still they were born perfectly healthy and normal. I know children whose mothers tried to abort them by mechanical means, who went to abortionists who made one or more attempts to induce the abortion—I know even cases where the mothers bled as a result of such attempts—and nevertheless, the children were born perfectly healthy, developed normally physically and mentally.

I know of children whose mothers carried them in anger and pain from the moment of conception until they were born. Yet, they came into the world perfectly normal. I know a child whose [123]mother experienced intense jealousy throughout her entire pregnancy, and still, the child was born healthy, normal, and has grown into a remarkable man. I know children whose mothers battled severe pneumonia, typhoid fever, and other illnesses, yet they were born perfectly healthy and normal. I know of children whose mothers tried every method to abort them, taking various medications until they were extremely ill, and still, they were born perfectly healthy and normal. I know children whose mothers attempted to abort them through mechanical means, visiting abortionists who tried multiple times to induce the abortion—I even know cases where the mothers bled from such attempts—and nonetheless, the children were born perfectly healthy and developed normally both physically and mentally.

Of course these are not things that I would advise women to do or to undergo. I would not advise pregnant women to worry, to be sick, to take poisonous medicines or to make attempts at abortion, but I merely bring up these points to emphasize to my readers not to take the necessity of prenatal care in too absolute a sense, and not to worry themselves unnecessarily if the conditions during their pregnancy are not all that could be desired. The child [124]is not necessarily going to be affected. The condition of the germ-plasms, i.e., the condition of the ovum and the spermatozoa at the time of conception is more important than all subsequent care during gestation.

Of course, these aren't things I would recommend that women do or go through. I wouldn't suggest that pregnant women should worry, feel sick, take harmful medications, or attempt abortion; I just mention these points to stress to my readers not to take the need for prenatal care too rigidly and not to stress themselves out unnecessarily if their pregnancy isn't perfect. The child [124] isn't necessarily going to be affected. The condition of the germ-plasms, meaning the quality of the egg and sperm at the time of conception, is more crucial than any care during pregnancy.

As there are foolish people who possess a peculiar knack of misinterpreting and misunderstanding everything, I wish to emphasize that hygiene during pregnancy should not be neglected. Everything possible should be done to put the mother in the best possible physical and mental condition. All I want to say is that it is bad to be insane on the subject, that it is bad to take things in an absolute sense, and that it is bad to exaggerate.

As there are foolish people who have a strange ability to misinterpret and misunderstand everything, I want to stress that hygiene during pregnancy should not be overlooked. Everything possible should be done to ensure the mother is in the best physical and mental condition. All I'm saying is that it's unhealthy to be extreme about the issue, that it's unhelpful to take things too literally, and that it's not good to exaggerate.

You will often hear it said that a child that was conceived when the father was in an exhilarated condition is apt to be epileptic, or nervous, or insane, and what not. This is also to be taken with a grain of salt. A chronic alcoholic has a defective germ-plasm, and his children are apt to be defective. But a glass of wine at a wedding banquet cannot affect the previously formed spermatozoa. And the statements about children being born defective or developing defectively because their fathers took an occasional glass of wine are unworthy of serious consideration; are unworthy of any consideration.

You often hear that a child conceived when the father is really excited is likely to be epileptic, nervous, or insane, and other things like that. This should definitely be taken with a grain of salt. A chronic alcoholic has faulty genetic material, and his children are likely to have issues. But having a glass of wine at a wedding banquet won’t affect the sperm that’s already been produced. The claims that children are born with problems or develop issues solely because their fathers had an occasional glass of wine are not worth serious consideration; they aren’t worth considering at all.

In connection with the above the reports of some [125]cases of violence and accidents during pregnancy which, in spite of their severity, did not affect the children, will prove of interest.

In relation to the above, the reports of some [125] cases of violence and accidents during pregnancy, which, despite their seriousness, did not impact the children, will be of interest.

A delicate little woman missed her periods. She was sure she couldn't be more than two weeks over-due. And this is what she did. For five nights in succession she took hot mustard baths and she took them so hot that each time she nearly fainted and came out from them like a broiled lobster. No effect. She then took a box of pills which cost her two dollars. No effect except causing diarrhea. She then took two boxes of capsules which upset her stomach and made her fearfully nauseous. No other effect. She then ate one-half a colocynth, which made her terribly sick, causing a bloody diarrhea. She had to stay in bed for three or four days. She then took burning vaginal injections with some ipecac in them. No effect except making her feel raw so that she needed large amounts of cold cream. She then took secale cornutum and radix gossypii. No effect except giving her a headache, making her sick to her stomach and completely destroying her appetite, so that within a very short time she lost nearly ten pounds. She was then told that long walks might be efficient. She took walks of six and seven miles at a time, coming home more dead than alive. No effect. She then heard that jumping off [126]a table is a very efficient means. She did it a dozen times in succession so that she was completely fagged out and out of breath. Eight and a half months later she gave birth to a perfectly healthy, well-formed boy weighing eight pounds.

A delicate little woman missed her periods. She was sure she couldn't be more than two weeks overdue. And this is what she did. For five consecutive nights, she took hot mustard baths so intense that each time she nearly fainted and emerged from them like a boiled lobster. No results. She then took a box of pills that cost her two dollars. The only effect was causing diarrhea. Next, she took two boxes of capsules that upset her stomach and made her feel extremely nauseous. No other effects. She then ate half a colocynth, which made her incredibly sick, resulting in bloody diarrhea. She had to stay in bed for three or four days. After that, she tried burning vaginal injections with some ipecac in them. The only result was feeling raw, so she needed large amounts of cold cream. Then she took secale cornutum and radix gossypii. Again, no effect, just a headache, stomach sickness, and a complete loss of appetite, causing her to lose nearly ten pounds in a very short time. She was then told that long walks might help. She walked six to seven miles at a time, coming home feeling more dead than alive. Still no effect. Then she heard that jumping off [126]a table is a very effective method. She did this twelve times in a row, leaving her completely exhausted and out of breath. Eight and a half months later, she gave birth to a perfectly healthy, well-formed boy weighing eight pounds.

The following case was reported by Brillaud-Laujardiere. A farmer who was responsible for the condition of a servant of his household conceived the idea of riding horseback with her in order to bring about an abortion, and pushing her off when the horse was running at great speed. This he repeated several times. The woman gave birth to a perfectly normal infant at full term.

The following case was reported by Brillaud-Laujardiere. A farmer who was responsible for a servant in his household decided to ride horseback with her to try to cause an abortion, and he would push her off while the horse was running at high speed. He did this several times. The woman ended up giving birth to a perfectly normal baby at full term.

Hofmann reports that another farmer, under similar circumstances, brutally kicked the woman in the abdomen repeatedly until she lost consciousness. The pregnancy continued to full term notwithstanding. In another case of Hofmann's, a woman allowed a heavy door to fall upon her, but the pregnancy was not affected.

Hofmann reports that another farmer, in similar circumstances, brutally kicked the woman in the abdomen multiple times until she passed out. The pregnancy continued to full term, nonetheless. In another case from Hofmann, a woman let a heavy door fall on her, but the pregnancy was not impacted.

Dr. Guibout relates that a German woman, living with her husband in California, being pregnant, wished to return to Munich, her home-town, to be delivered. The train in which she travelled through Panama collided with another train. Threatened abortion required her to take a rest. She took a steamer and after a very rough passage reached [127]Portsmouth. From there she went to Paris. Here she fell down a flight of stairs in the hotel where she was stopping. Again she was threatened with abortion, but after a rest was in good condition and continued her journey. She finally reached home, and was delivered at full term of a normal infant.

Dr. Guibout shares that a German woman, living with her husband in California, who was pregnant, wanted to return to Munich, her hometown, to give birth. The train she took through Panama collided with another train. She faced complications that required her to rest. She then took a steamer and, after a very rough journey, arrived at [127] Portsmouth. From there, she traveled to Paris. While there, she fell down a flight of stairs at the hotel where she was staying. Again, she faced complications, but after resting, she was in good condition and continued her journey. She finally made it home and gave birth to a healthy baby at full term.

Vibert reports the case of a woman who was in a train accident which injured her severely, killed two of her children, but did not affect her pregnancy. She was delivered at the proper time of a normal baby.

Vibert tells the story of a woman who was in a train accident that severely injured her and killed two of her children, but it didn't impact her pregnancy. She gave birth at the right time to a healthy baby.







Chapter EighteenToC

THE MENOPAUSE OR CHANGE OF LIFE

Time of Menopause—Cause of Suffering During Menopause—Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Not Synonymous—Increased Libido During Menopause—Change of Life in Men.

Time of Menopause—Cause of Suffering During Menopause—Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Not Synonymous—Increased Libido During Menopause—Change of Life in Men.


In the chapter on menstruation I referred briefly to the menopause. I will consider it here somewhat more in detail.

In the chapter about menstruation, I briefly mentioned menopause. I'll discuss it here in a bit more detail.

The menopause, also called the climacteric, and in common language "change of life," is the period at which woman ceases to menstruate. The average age at which this occurs is about forty-eight. But while some women continue to menstruate up to the age of fifty, fifty-two, and even fifty-five, others cease to menstruate at the age of forty-five or even forty-two. Between forty-four and fifty-two are the normal limits. Anything before or beyond that is exceptional.

The menopause, also known as the climacteric and commonly referred to as the "change of life," is the time when a woman stops menstruating. The average age for this to happen is around forty-eight. However, while some women may continue to have their periods until they are fifty, fifty-two, or even fifty-five, others may stop as early as forty-five or even forty-two. The typical range is from forty-four to fifty-two, with anything outside of that being uncommon.

Just as the beginning of menstruation may set in without any trouble of any kind, and just as some women have not the slightest unpleasant symptoms during the entire period of their menstrual life, so [129]the menopause occurs in some women without any trouble, physical or psychic. The periods between the menses become perhaps a little longer, or a little irregular, the menstrual flow becomes more and more scanty, then one or several periods may be skipped altogether, and the menopause is permanently established. Many women, however, the majority probably, suffer considerably during the transitional year or years of the menopause. Symptoms are both of a physical and of a psychic character, but the psychic symptoms predominate. There may be headache, capricious appetite, or complete loss of appetite, considerable loss of flesh, or on the contrary very sudden and rapid putting on of fat, great irritability, insomnia, profuse perspiration; hot flashes throughout the body, and particularly in the face, which make the face "blushing" and congested, are particularly frequent. Then the woman's character may be completely changed. From gentle and submissive she may become pugnacious and quarrelsome. Jealousy without any grounds for it may be one of the disagreeable symptoms, making both the wife and the husband very unhappy. In some exceptional cases a genuine neurosis or psychosis may develop.

Just like the start of menstruation can happen without any issues, and some women experience no unpleasant symptoms throughout their menstrual life, the menopause can also occur in some women without any physical or emotional trouble. The intervals between periods might become slightly longer or a bit irregular, the menstrual flow may become lighter, and eventually, one or more periods could be skipped entirely, marking the onset of menopause. However, many women, likely the majority, face significant discomfort during the transitional year or years of menopause. The symptoms can be both physical and emotional, but the emotional symptoms are usually more prominent. These may include headaches, fluctuating appetite or a total loss of appetite, noticeable weight loss, or on the flip side, sudden weight gain, significant irritability, insomnia, excessive sweating, and hot flashes throughout the body, particularly in the face, causing it to flush and feel congested. A woman's personality might change dramatically; she could go from being gentle and compliant to combative and argumentative. Jealousy without any basis might be one of the unpleasant symptoms, leading to unhappiness for both the wife and husband. In rare cases, a genuine neurosis or psychosis could develop.

Cause of Suffering During Menopause. It is my conviction, and I have had this conviction for many [130]years, that many, if not most, of the distressing symptoms of the menopause are due, not to the menopause itself, but to the wrong ideas about this period that have prevailed for so many centuries. We know the influence of the mind over the body, and the pernicious effect which wrong ideas may exercise over our feelings. The generally prevalent opinion among women, and men for that matter, and not only of the laity but unfortunately of the medical profession as well, is that the menopause is the end of woman's sexual life. Every woman is laboring under the erroneous impression that with the establishment of the menopause, with the cessation of the menses, she ceases to be a woman, and as she does not become a man, she becomes something of a neuter being, neither woman nor man. And she has the idea that after the menopause she can have no further attraction for her husband or for other men. Naturally such an idea has a very depressing effect on any human being. Any human being fights to the last to retain all its human functions, especially the function which is considered as important as is the sexual function.

Cause of Suffering During Menopause. I firmly believe, and I've held this belief for many [130] years, that many, if not most, of the distressing symptoms of menopause are not caused by menopause itself, but by the misconceptions about this life stage that have lasted for centuries. We understand the mind's influence over the body and how harmful wrong beliefs can impact our feelings. The common perception among women—and men, for that matter, and sadly even the medical profession—is that menopause marks the end of a woman's sexual life. Many women operate under the false belief that with the onset of menopause and the end of menstruation, they stop being women. Since they don't become men, they feel like they become something neutral, neither woman nor man. They also think that after menopause, they lose all attraction for their spouses and other men. Naturally, this belief can have a very discouraging effect on anyone. People strive to maintain all their human functions, especially a function as significant as sexuality.

Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Not Synonymous. Of course with the permanent cessation of the menses the woman's reproductive function is at an end. But the reproductive function is [131]not synonymous with the sexual function, I must insist again and again, and naturally until this erroneous idea is dispelled much unnecessary misery will be the lot of our women. If women in general will learn that with the establishment of the menopause they do not cease to be women, if they will learn that the sexual desire in women lasts long beyond the cessation of the menopause, many women being as passionate at sixty as at thirty, if they will learn that their attractiveness or non-attractiveness to the male sex does not depend upon the menopause, but upon their general condition, if they will learn that many women at fifty and sixty are much more attractive than some women at half that age, they will not take the onset of the menopause so tragically and they will thereby avoid the greater part of their mental and emotional suffering.

Reproductive Function and Sexual Function Not Synonymous. Of course, when menstruation permanently stops, a woman's reproductive function ends. But I must emphasize repeatedly that the reproductive function is [131]not the same as sexual function. Until this misconception is cleared up, many women will continue to experience unnecessary suffering. If women in general understand that with the onset of menopause they do not stop being women, and that sexual desire can last well beyond menopause—many women feeling just as passionate at sixty as they did at thirty—they’ll realize that their attractiveness to men doesn’t hinge on menopause but rather on their overall well-being. If they recognize that many women in their fifties and sixties can be far more attractive than some women half their age, they won’t view the onset of menopause so tragically, thus minimizing much of their mental and emotional pain.

The actual atrophy of the ovaries, uterus, external genitals and the breasts can, of course, not be prevented, but that atrophy is a slow and gradual process, and is not in itself the cause of the various distressing symptoms that we have enumerated.

The actual shrinking of the ovaries, uterus, external genitals, and breasts can't be stopped, but that shrinking is a slow and gradual process, and it isn’t the direct cause of the various troubling symptoms we've mentioned.

The treatment of the menopause, if the symptoms are at all disagreeable, or distressing, should be in the hands of a competent physician. A little wholesome advice may be more efficient than gallons of medicine and bushels of pills. In general the woman [132]should try to lead as calm and peaceful a life as possible. Warm baths daily are beneficial, constipation should be guarded against, hot vaginal douches are often efficient against the disagreeable flushes, and last, but not least, the husband should during this critical period be doubly kind and doubly considerate of his wife. It is during the years between forty-five and fifty-five that the wife is most in need of her husband's sympathy and support.

The treatment for menopause, if the symptoms are at all uncomfortable or distressing, should be managed by a qualified physician. Some good advice can be more effective than tons of medication and a mountain of pills. In general, a woman [132]should aim to live as calmly and peacefully as possible. Daily warm baths are helpful, it's important to prevent constipation, hot vaginal douches can often alleviate unpleasant hot flashes, and finally, the husband should be especially kind and considerate during this challenging time. It's from ages forty-five to fifty-five that a wife needs her husband's sympathy and support the most.

Increased Libido During Menopause. There is one rather delicate symptom which I must not pass unmentioned. Some women during the years while the menopause is being established, and for some years after the menopause, experience a greatly heightened sexual desire. In some cases this increased libido is normal, that is, no other pathologic symptoms or local conditions can be discovered. In some cases the increased libido is distinctly due to local congestion, congestion of the ovaries, the uterus, etc. In some cases, I can distinctly testify, it is psychic or autosuggestive. Because the woman thinks, and believes that other people think, that she is soon going to lose all her sexuality, she unconsciously works herself up into a sexual passion which sometimes may be of long duration and may even lead to disastrous results.

Increased Libido During Menopause. There's one rather sensitive symptom that I need to mention. Some women during the years when menopause is starting, and for several years afterward, experience a significant increase in sexual desire. In some cases, this heightened libido is normal, meaning there are no other pathological symptoms or local issues found. In other cases, the increased libido is clearly linked to local congestion, such as congestion of the ovaries, the uterus, etc. In some instances, I can clearly say, it is psychological or self-suggestive. Because the woman thinks, and believes that others think, that she is soon going to lose all her sexuality, she unconsciously works herself into a state of sexual excitement that can sometimes last a long time and may even lead to negative consequences.

What to do in such cases? Where the woman's [133]libido is normal or near normal, then naturally it should be normally gratified. But if the libido seems to be abnormally strong and the demands for sexual gratification are too frequent, then the woman should be treated and sexual gratification should not be indulged in, because in such cases, as a rule, sexual gratification only adds fuel to the fire, and the woman's demands may become more and more frequent, more and more insistent. In exceptional cases it may even reach the intensity of nymphomania. In such cases the aid of a tactful physician is indispensable.

What should be done in these situations? If a woman's libido is normal or close to normal, it should naturally be satisfied appropriately. However, if her libido appears excessively strong and her demands for sexual satisfaction are too frequent, she should seek treatment, and sexual gratification should not be indulged in. This is because, in such cases, sexual gratification typically just escalates the issue, leading to more frequent and insistent demands. In rare instances, it may even develop into nymphomania. In these cases, the assistance of a sensitive physician is crucial.




Change of Life in Men

To people not familiar with the subject it sounds rather strange to speak of "change of life" in men.

To people who aren't familiar with the topic, it sounds pretty odd to talk about "change of life" in men.

Man, possessing no menstrual function, cannot have any menopause, but still sexologists and psychologists who have studied the subject carefully are convinced that between the ages of forty-five and fifty-five men also undergo a certain change which may be spoken of as the change of life or the male climacteric.

Man, who doesn't have menstrual cycles, can't experience menopause, but still, sexologists and psychologists who have closely studied the topic are convinced that between the ages of forty-five and fifty-five, men also go through a change that can be referred to as the change of life or the male climacteric.

They become irritable, capricious, very susceptible to feminine charms, are apt to fall in love, and in many the sexual instinct is greatly increased. As [134]in women, this increase of the sexual desire is sometimes due to pathologic causes, such as an inflamed prostate gland—in other cases it is of psychic origin.

They become irritable, unpredictable, very sensitive to feminine charms, tend to fall in love easily, and in many cases, their sexual desire is greatly heightened. As [134]in women, this increase in sexual desire can sometimes be due to medical issues, like an inflamed prostate gland—while in other instances, it stems from psychological causes.

Just as a man should be particularly kind and considerate to his wife during her menopause, so the wife, understanding that her husband is going through a critical period, will also increase her tact, patience and consideration.

Just as a man should be especially kind and considerate to his wife during her menopause, the wife, knowing that her husband is going through a challenging time, will also boost her tact, patience, and consideration.







Chapter NineteenToC

THE HABIT OF MASTURBATION

Definition of Masturbation—Its Injurious Effects in Girls as Compared with Boys—Married Life of the Girl Masturbator—Necessity for Change in Injurious Attitude of Parents who Discover the Habit—Common-sense Treatment of the Habit—How to Prevent Formation of Habit—Parents' Advice to Children—Hot Baths as Factor in Masturbation—Other Physical Factors—Mental Masturbation and Its Effects.

Definition of Masturbation—Its Harmful Effects on Girls Compared to Boys—Married Life of the Girl Who Masturbates—Need for Change in the Harmful Attitude of Parents Who Find Out About the Habit—Practical Approaches to Addressing the Habit—How to Prevent the Habit from Forming—Parents' Guidance for Their Children—Hot Baths as a Factor in Masturbation—Other Physical Factors—Mental Masturbation and Its Effects.


Masturbation or self-abuse is a term applied to a bad habit which consists in handling and rubbing the genitals. It is a bad habit because it is apt to injure the health and future development of the girl. The more frequently it is practiced, the more injurious it is. It is more injurious than when practiced by boys, because the effects are usually more permanent. Girls who indulge in the habit of masturbation to excess not only weaken themselves, become anemic and get a dingy, pimply complexion, but they lose their desire for normal sexual relations when they grow up, and are unable to derive any pleasure from the sexual act when they get married. In fact, many girls who masturbated excessively get a strong aversion to the normal sexual [136]act, and their married life is an unhappy one. Their husbands often have to ask for a divorce. Fortunately, the habit is much less widespread among girls than it is among boys. While about ninety per cent. of all boys—nine out of every ten—masturbate more or less, only about ten or at most twenty per cent. of girls are addicted to this habit. But whatever the percentage may be, the habit is an injurious one, and if you value your health, your beauty and proper growth and mental development, you should not indulge in it. If you are already indulging, if you are used to handling your genitals, if a bad companion has initiated you into the habit, you should give it up. And mothers should watch their children, guard them against developing the habit, and do everything possible to cure them of it, if prevention comes too late.

Masturbation or self-abuse refers to a harmful habit involving touching and rubbing the genitals. It's considered harmful because it can negatively impact a girl’s health and future development. The more often it's done, the more detrimental it becomes. It can be more harmful for girls than for boys, as the effects tend to be more lasting. Girls who excessively engage in masturbation not only weaken their bodies, become anemic, and develop a dull, pimpled complexion, but they also lose interest in normal sexual relationships as they mature, making it difficult to enjoy the sexual experience once they marry. In fact, many girls who have a history of excessive masturbation develop a strong dislike for normal sexual activity, leading to unhappy marriages. Husbands often find themselves asking for a divorce. Luckily, this habit is much less common among girls compared to boys. While around ninety percent of boys—nine out of ten—masturbate to some extent, only about ten to twenty percent of girls engage in this habit. Regardless of the percentage, it's a harmful practice, and if you care about your health, appearance, proper growth, and mental development, you should avoid it. If you are already engaging in it, if you’ve gotten into the habit of touching yourself, or if a negative friend has introduced you to this behavior, it’s important to stop. Mothers should keep an eye on their children, protect them from developing this habit, and do everything they can to help them quit if prevention is no longer possible.

But while as you see I do not deny the evil effects of masturbation, it is necessary to state that a great change has taken place in our opinions on the subject, and it is but right that parents should know of this change of opinion among the medical profession, particularly among those who specialize in sexology.

But while you see I don’t deny the negative effects of masturbation, it’s important to mention that there has been a significant shift in our views on this topic, and it’s right for parents to be aware of this change of opinion within the medical community, especially among those who specialize in sexology.

Wrong Behavior of Parents. When parents make the "awful" discovery that their child is fondling its genitals or is indulging in masturbation, they [137]feel as if a great calamity had befallen them. They could not feel worse if they learned that the child was a thief or a pyromaniac. Imbued with the medieval idea of the "sinfulness" of the habit, as well as its injuriousness, they begin to scold the child, to frighten it, to make it believe that it is doing something terrible, that it has disgraced them and itself; and they try to persuade it that, unless it stops immediately, the most direful consequences are awaiting it. The results of this mode of procedure are disastrous—much more so than is the masturbation itself.

Wrong Behavior of Parents. When parents make the "awful" discovery that their child is touching their genitals or engaging in masturbation, they [137]feel as if a great disaster has struck them. They feel just as bad as if they found out their child was a thief or a pyromaniac. Influenced by outdated beliefs about the "sinfulness" of this behavior and the harm it may cause, they start to scold the child, scare them, and make them believe they are doing something terrible, that they have brought shame on themselves and their family; and they try to convince the child that unless they stop immediately, they will face severe consequences. The effects of this approach are devastating—far worse than the act of masturbation itself.

Often the scolding and the exposure of the child are done in the presence of others. This implants in the poor girl a sullen resentment that only makes it more difficult for it to break the habit. When the child is brought to the physician, you can see by its behavior, by its downcast looks, by its sulkiness, by its attempt to refrain from tears, and other signs, that it regards the physician in exactly the same light as a youthful criminal regards the judge before whom he has been brought for trial.

Often, the scolding and the public humiliation of the child happen in front of others. This creates a deep sense of resentment in the poor girl that only makes it harder for her to overcome the issue. When the child is brought to the doctor, you can see by her behavior—her downcast eyes, sulky demeanor, her effort to hold back tears, and other signals—that she views the doctor just like a young offender sees the judge who is about to decide their fate.

It is time, high time, that this silly and injurious attitude toward a practice, which is very common, be radically changed. It is time that parents and physicians learn that the injuriousness of the habit has been greatly, grossly exaggerated. It is time [138]that they know that the vast majority of boys and girls get over the habit without being much, or any, the worse for it. The knowledge of this fact will not only save them and the children much needless anguish and suffering, but will make it much easier to deal with the latter, make it much easier to get them divorced from the habit.

It’s time, well past time, for this foolish and harmful attitude towards a common practice to change completely. Parents and doctors need to understand that the negative effects of the habit have been seriously exaggerated. They need to realize that most boys and girls move past the habit without facing much, if any, harm from it. Knowing this will not only prevent unnecessary pain and suffering for them and their children, but it will also make it much easier to help the kids break free from the habit.

If we look at the matter in a sensible, common-sense way, and do not tell the child caught in the practice that it has done something disgracefully vicious and criminal, but speak to it kindly and tell it that it is doing something that may injure it greatly, that may interfere with its future mental and physical health and development, then we shall have far greater success in our endeavors to break the boy or the girl of the habit of masturbation. As I have said in another place:

If we approach this issue in a reasonable, straightforward way, and instead of labeling the child engaged in this behavior as disgracefully bad or criminal, we talk to them gently and explain that they are doing something that could harm them significantly, impacting their future mental and physical health and development, we will be much more successful in helping the boy or girl overcome the habit of masturbation. As I have mentioned elsewhere:

"In my opinion, stigmatizing even the most moderate indulgence in masturbation as a vice has a deleterious effect upon the people who so indulge and makes it harder for them to break off the habit. Every thinking physician and sexologist can tell you that picturing the masturbatory habit in too lurid colors and stigmatizing it with too strong epithets has, as a rule, the contrary effect to the one expected. The victims of the habit consider themselves degraded, irretrievably lost. They lose their [139]self-respect, and it is, on account of that, harder for them to break themselves of the habit."

"In my opinion, labeling even the slightest indulgence in masturbation as a vice has a harmful effect on those who engage in it and makes it tougher for them to quit. Any thoughtful doctor or sexologist will tell you that depicting the masturbation habit in overly dramatic terms and using harsh labels usually has the opposite effect of what is intended. Those caught in this habit think of themselves as degraded and irretrievably lost. They lose their [139]self-respect, and because of that, it becomes even harder for them to break free from the habit."

We shall accomplish a good deal more with our youthful and older patients if we leave alone, altogether, the moral side of the question—if there be any moral side to it—and emphasize the physical injuriousness of the habit. We do not want to diminish the self-respect of our boys and girls, we want to increase it; and we can not do this if we make them believe that a masturbator is a vicious criminal. Inspire your patients with confidence, tell them that indulgence in the habit jeopardizes their future growth, both physical and mental, their health and happiness, and you will find them easier to control.

We can achieve much more with our younger and older patients if we completely avoid discussing the moral aspect of the issue—if there even is one—and focus instead on the harmful physical effects of the habit. Our goal is to boost the self-esteem of our boys and girls, not lower it; and we can’t do that if we lead them to think that someone who masturbates is a terrible person. Instill confidence in your patients, explain that indulging in this habit risks their future growth, both physically and mentally, as well as their health and happiness, and you’ll find them easier to manage.

I am not trying to minimize the danger of masturbation, for, if indulged in from an early age and to great excess, the results may be disastrous. But, even if I were to minimize the evil consequences, that would be less of a sin than to exaggerate them the way it has been done for so many years, by so many people in the profession and out of it. The evil results of exaggerating the influence of masturbation have been so great in the past that, if now the pendulum were to swing to the other extreme, I am sure it would not be a bad thing at all.

I’m not downplaying the risks of masturbation because if someone starts early and goes overboard, it can lead to serious problems. However, even if I were to downplay the negative effects, that would be less wrong than exaggerating them like so many have for years, both in and out of the profession. The negative outcomes of overstating the impact of masturbation have been so severe in the past that if we now went to the other extreme, I’m sure it wouldn’t be a bad thing at all.

[140]To deal with the subject of the treatment of masturbation belongs to a medical treatise. But, a few remarks on how to prevent children from acquiring the habit of masturbation will not be out of place.

[140]Discussing the topic of treatment for masturbation fits within a medical text. However, it’s worth mentioning some ways to prevent children from developing the habit of masturbation.

Prevention of the Habit of Masturbation. The keynote of preventing the habit is, carefully to watch the child from its earliest infancy. We know that not infrequently stupid or vicious nursemaids, wet-nurses, and even governesses ignorantly or deliberately induce the habit in children under their charge. This, of course, must be prevented. Even children of the age of nine, ten, eleven years should not be left alone, but always be under supervision. Too close friendship between boys or girls, particularly of different ages, should be looked upon with suspicion.

Preventing the Habit of Masturbation. The key to preventing this habit is to carefully monitor the child from an early age. It’s known that at times, careless or harmful caregivers, wet nurses, and even governesses can unintentionally or intentionally encourage this behavior in the children they look after. This must be avoided. Even children who are nine, ten, or eleven years old should not be left unsupervised and should always be monitored. Close friendships between boys and girls, especially those of different ages, should be regarded with caution.

A number of girls never should sleep in the same room without supervision by an older person.

A number of girls should never sleep in the same room without being supervised by an adult.

The sleeping together of two in the same bed, whether it be two children or a grown person and a child, should not be permitted under any circumstances. I admit of no exceptions to this demand. It makes no difference whether the other person is a mother, a father, a brother or a sister. Leaving out of the question any deliberate element, the thing is dangerous; for, very often, unintentionally, [141]unwittingly, masturbation is initiated by this intimate contact.

The act of two people sleeping in the same bed, whether it's two children or an adult with a child, should not be allowed under any circumstances. I don't accept any exceptions to this rule. It doesn't matter if the other person is a mother, father, brother, or sister. Leaving aside any deliberate intention, this situation is dangerous; often, unintentionally, masturbation is triggered by this close contact.

The child—boy or girl—should sleep alone, on a rather hard mattress. The covering should be light. A coverlet may be put over the feet. The child always should sleep with the arms out upon the cover or blanket, never under the same. If this is done from childhood on, it is very easy to get used to this way of sleeping, and many a case of masturbation will thus be obviated. The child should not be permitted to loll in bed: it must be taught to get up as soon as it awakes in the morning. The general bringing-up must be of a strengthening, hardening character; and this applies both to the body and the will. When the children reach the age of nine, ten, eleven, twelve or thirteen years (we must use discrimination and judgment, for, some children of nine are as developed as are others of thirteen), we must tell them that it is bad and injurious to handle one's genitals, and we must warn them to shun any companions who wish to initiate them into any manipulations of these parts or who show an inclination to talk about the sexual organs and sex matters.

The child—boy or girl—should sleep alone on a relatively firm mattress. The covering should be light. A light blanket can be placed over the feet. The child should always sleep with their arms resting on the blanket, never under it. If this habit is established from a young age, it becomes easy to adapt to this sleeping style, and it can help prevent many cases of masturbation. The child should not be allowed to lounge in bed; they must be taught to get up as soon as they wake up in the morning. The overall upbringing should focus on strengthening and toughening, applying to both the body and the will. When the children reach the ages of nine, ten, eleven, twelve, or thirteen (we need to be discerning since some nine-year-olds may be as developed as others who are thirteen), we must explain to them that it is harmful to touch their genitals, and we should advise them to avoid peers who try to introduce them to manipulations of these areas or who seem interested in discussing sexual organs and matters.

Hot baths are very injurious for young children in their influence in this direction. There is no question that a hot bath has a very decided stimulating effect upon the sexual desire of adults as well as of [142]children, both male and female; in fact, I have had several patients of either sex tell me that their first masturbatory act was committed while they were in a hot bath. Of course, the sensation having been pleasurable, they kept on repeating the experience.

Hot baths are very harmful for young children in this way. It's clear that a hot bath strongly stimulates sexual desire in both adults and children, whether male or female. In fact, I've had several patients, regardless of gender, tell me that their first experience with masturbation happened while they were in a hot bath. Naturally, since the sensation was pleasurable, they continued to seek out that experience.

Every factor liable to give rise to the habit should be removed. Thus, for instance, eczema about the genitals, strongly acid urine, seatworms, and the like, should be treated until cured. That anything having a tendency prematurely to awaken the sexual instinct should be rigorously avoided, goes without saying.

Every factor that may contribute to the habit should be eliminated. For example, conditions like eczema around the genitals, highly acidic urine, seatworms, and similar issues should be addressed until resolved. It's obvious that anything that might prematurely trigger the sexual instinct should be strictly avoided.

Mental or Psychic Masturbation. Some girls and women will abstain from handling themselves with their hands (manual masturbation), but will practice what we call mental masturbation. That is, they will concentrate their minds on the opposite sex, will picture to themselves various lascivious scenes, until they feel "satisfied." This method is extremely injurious and exhausting and is very likely to lead to neurasthenia and a nervous breakdown. You should break yourself of it, by all means, if you can. For it is even more injurious than the regular habit.

Mental or Psychic Masturbation. Some girls and women avoid touching themselves with their hands (manual masturbation), but engage in what we call mental masturbation. They focus their thoughts on the opposite sex and imagine various suggestive scenarios until they feel "satisfied." This practice is very harmful and draining and can easily lead to anxiety and a nervous breakdown. You should definitely try to stop this habit if you can, as it is even more damaging than the regular practice.







Chapter TwentyToC

LEUCORRHEA—THE WHITES

Misconception Regarding the Meaning of the Term "Leucorrhea"—A Common Complaint—Severe Cases—Reasons for Resistance to Treatment—Proper Local Treatment of the Disorder—Sterility Due to Leucorrhea—Causes of Leucorrhea—Tonic Medicines—Local Treatment—Formulæ for Douching.

Misunderstanding About the Meaning of "Leucorrhea"—A Common Issue—Severe Instances—Reasons for Resistance to Treatment—Correct Local Treatment for the Condition—Infertility Due to Leucorrhea—Causes of Leucorrhea—Strengthening Medicines—Local Treatment—Recipes for Douching.


Leucorrhea means literally a "white running," and is applied by the laity to any whitish discharge coming from the vagina. This is wrong, because some white discharges may be of little importance; others may be of a serious character, and not be leucorrhea at all.

Leucorrhea literally means "white flow," and it's often used by people to describe any whitish discharge coming from the vagina. This is incorrect, because some white discharges may not be a big deal; others could be serious and not actually be leucorrhea at all.

Leucorrhea is one of the banes of the modern girl and woman. It is very frequent. Probably at least twenty-five per cent, (some say fifty or seventy-five per cent.) of all women suffer with it in a greater or lesser degree. In some cases it is only an annoyance, necessitating the frequent changing of napkins, but in others it causes a great deal of weakness, backache, erosions, itching and burning. It is very resistant to treatment, particularly in girls. The reason it is so resistant to treatment is because the [144]discharge, while coming from the vagina, does not usually originate in the vagina; it originates in the neck of the womb, and the hundreds and hundreds of injections that women take for their leucorrhea only reach the vagina; they cannot penetrate into the womb. And it is only by treating the cavity of the cervix, which can only be done by a physician, through a speculum, that the root of the trouble can be reached. And, if any erosion or ulcer is noticed, it can be directly touched up with the necessary application. And it is for this reason that in girls leucorrhea is so much more difficult to treat. For fear of having the hymen ruptured the girl objects to a thorough examination and to local treatment, and the leucorrhea is permitted to proceed until perhaps a chronic inflammation of the womb and the Fallopian tubes is established. There is no doubt that many cases of sterility or childlessness in women are due to long-neglected leucorrhea in girlhood.

Leucorrhea is one of the major issues facing modern girls and women. It's very common, affecting at least twenty-five percent of women, with some estimates suggesting as high as fifty or seventy-five percent. In some cases, it’s just an annoyance that requires frequent change of pads, but in others, it leads to significant weakness, back pain, irritation, and burning sensations. It’s quite resistant to treatment, especially in younger women. The reason for this resistance is that while the discharge comes from the vagina, it doesn’t usually originate there; it actually starts at the cervix. The numerous treatments women use for leucorrhea typically target only the vagina and can't reach the cervix. The only way to address the issue is to treat the cervical cavity, which can only be done by a doctor using a speculum. If there’s any erosion or ulcer present, it can be treated directly. This is also why leucorrhea is more challenging to treat in girls. Due to the fear of damaging the hymen, young women often resist thorough examinations and local treatments, allowing the condition to worsen until it potentially leads to chronic inflammation of the uterus and fallopian tubes. It’s clear that many cases of infertility in women can be traced back to long-ignored leucorrhea in their youth.

What Is the Cause of Leucorrhea? We can answer simply: the cause of leucorrhea is catarrh in any part of the female genital tract. But this is no real answer. What are the causes of the catarrh? The causes of catarrh are many: the most common cause is a cold. Wetting the feet and getting chilled, particularly during the menses, may set up a catarrh in the cervix. Long standing on one's feet, lifting [145]and carrying heavy bundles, dancing in overheated rooms and then going out scantily clad in the chill night air, prolonged ungratified sexual excitement, lack of cleanliness in the external genitals—all these are factors in setting up a catarrh of the cervix with a resultant leucorrhea. A general rundown condition, worry, overwork, too hard study, lack of fresh air, and a general scrofulous condition also favor the development of catarrh of the womb and leucorrhea. It will therefore be seen that the treatment of leucorrhea to be successful must be general and local.

What Is the Cause of Leucorrhea? The simple answer is that the cause of leucorrhea is inflammation in any part of the female genital tract. But that's not a complete answer. What causes this inflammation? There are many reasons for it, with the most common being a cold. Getting your feet wet and feeling cold, especially during your period, can trigger inflammation in the cervix. Standing for long periods, lifting and carrying heavy loads, dancing in overheated rooms and then going outside dressed lightly in the cold night air, ongoing unfulfilled sexual arousal, and poor hygiene in the external genital area—all of these contribute to inflammation of the cervix, leading to leucorrhea. A general state of fatigue, anxiety, excessive work, intense studying, lack of fresh air, and an overall unhealthy condition also increase the risk of cervical inflammation and leucorrhea. Therefore, it's clear that effective treatment for leucorrhea must address both general and local factors.

General Treatment. The general treatment consists in general hygienic measures and in common sense. The patient should not be on her feet more than she can help, and she should not walk until exhausted or fatigued. It is better to take several short walks than one long one. The corset she wears, if she wears any at all, should be of the modern kind: not one that presses the womb and the other abdominal organs down, but one that supports the abdominal walls, and rather raises the abdominal organs up. The lacing or buttoning must be from below up, and not from above down. That it should not in any way interfere with the freedom of respiration goes without saying. Constipation if any, to be treated, must be treated intelligently, by mild measures (see Constipation, in the chapter on [146]pregnancy), and care must be taken that the bowels move at regular hours. Where the leucorrhea is due to or is aggravated by anemia and general weakness, a good iron preparation, such as one Blaud's five-grain pill three times a day, or a tonic of iron, quinine and strychnine, will do good. A daily cold bath or cold sponge, followed by a brisk dry rubbing with a rough towel, is also useful.

General Treatment. The general treatment involves basic hygiene and common sense. The patient should stay off her feet as much as possible and avoid walking until she feels exhausted or tired. It's better to take several short walks instead of one long one. If she wears a corset, it should be a modern style: one that supports the abdominal walls and lifts the abdominal organs rather than pushing them down. The lacing or buttoning should be done from the bottom up, not the top down. It goes without saying that it should not interfere with her ability to breathe freely. If she has constipation, it should be addressed intelligently with mild methods (see Constipation, in the chapter on [146]pregnancy), and care should be taken to ensure her bowels move at regular times. If the leucorrhea is caused by or worsened by anemia and general weakness, taking a good iron supplement, like Blaud's five-grain pill three times a day or a tonic of iron, quinine, and strychnine, can be helpful. A daily cold bath or cold sponge, followed by a vigorous dry rub with a rough towel, is also beneficial.

Local Treatment. Local measures consist of painting or swabbing the vagina and cervix with various solutions, of tampons, suppositories and douches. Local application to the vagina and uterus can be done satisfactorily by the physician or nurse only. The insertion of a suppository or douching can be easily done by the patient herself.

Local Treatment. Local measures include applying or swabbing the vagina and cervix with different solutions, using tampons, suppositories, and douches. Local applications to the vagina and uterus should be performed by a physician or nurse. However, the patient can easily insert a suppository or perform douching herself.

While it is always best and safest to consult a physician, and, while self-medication is generally inadvisable, there are occasions when a physician is not available; in some small places a woman may, for various reasons, have a strong objection to gynecological examination and treatment; and some women may be too poor to pay the doctor. In such circumstances self-treatment is justified and there can be no objection to it if the remedies are harmless and are sure to do some good; that is, to improve the condition where they do not effect a complete cure.

While it’s always best and safest to consult a doctor, and self-medication is usually not recommended, there are times when a doctor isn’t available; in some small towns, a woman might, for various reasons, strongly object to gynecological exams and treatment; and some women may not have enough money to pay for a doctor. In these situations, self-treatment is acceptable, and there’s no issue with it as long as the remedies are harmless and likely to help, meaning they can improve the situation even if they don’t lead to a complete cure.

[147]One of the simplest things is an alum tampon. You take a piece of absorbent cotton, about the size of a fist, spread it out, put about a tablespoonful of powdered alum on it, fold it up, tie a string around the center, insert it in the vagina as far as it will go, and leave it in for twenty-four hours. Then pull it gently by the string and syringe yourself with a quart or two quarts of warm water. Such a tampon may be inserted every other day or every third day, and I have known many cases where this simple treatment alone produced a cure. In some cases, however, douches work better and the two best things for douching are: tincture of iodine and lactic acid. Buy, say, four ounces of tincture of iodine, and use two teaspoonfuls in two quarts of hot water in a douche bag. This injection should be used twice a day, morning and night. Of the lactic acid you buy, say, a pint, and use two tablespoonfuls to two quarts of water. The lactic acid has the advantage over the tincture of iodine that it is colorless, while the iodine is dark and stains whatever it comes in contact with. Sometimes I order the use of the tincture of iodine and the lactic acid alternately: for one douche the tincture of iodine, for the next the lactic acid, and so on. When the condition improves, it is sufficient to use one teaspoonful of the tincture of iodine and one tablespoonful of the lactic acid to two quarts [148]of water. These injections are quite efficient and have the advantage of being perfectly harmless. One point about the injections: they should be taken not in the standing or squatting position (in which position the fluid comes right out), but while lying down, over a douche pan. The douche bag should be only about a foot above the bed, so that the irrigating fluid may come out slowly; the patient, after each injection taken in the daytime, should remain at least half an hour in bed (in the night time she stays all night in bed). This gives the injection a better chance to come in contact with all the parts of the vagina, and a portion of it comes in contact with the cervix, where it exerts a healing effect. Avoid the use of patent medicines.

[147]One of the simplest methods is using an alum tampon. You take a piece of absorbent cotton, about the size of your fist, spread it out, put about a tablespoon of powdered alum on it, fold it, tie a string around the center, insert it into the vagina as far as it can go, and leave it in for twenty-four hours. Then gently pull it out by the string and rinse yourself with one or two quarts of warm water. You can use this tampon every other day or every third day, and I've seen many cases where this simple treatment alone led to a cure. However, sometimes douches work better, and the two best options for douching are: tincture of iodine and lactic acid. Buy about four ounces of tincture of iodine, and use two teaspoons in two quarts of hot water in a douche bag. This injection should be used twice a day, morning and night. For lactic acid, buy about a pint, and use two tablespoons in two quarts of water. The advantage of lactic acid is that it is colorless, while iodine is dark and can stain anything it touches. Occasionally, I recommend alternating between tincture of iodine and lactic acid: use iodine for one douche and lactic acid for the next, and so on. As the condition improves, it's enough to use one teaspoon of tincture of iodine and one tablespoon of lactic acid in two quarts [148]of water. These injections are quite effective and are completely harmless. One important thing about the injections: they should not be administered while standing or squatting (in which case the fluid will come right out), but rather while lying down over a douche pan. The douche bag should be positioned about a foot above the bed to allow the irrigating fluid to come out slowly; after each daytime injection, the patient should stay in bed for at least half an hour (at night, she stays in bed all night). This gives the injection a better chance to reach all parts of the vagina, and some of it contacts the cervix, where it has a healing effect. Avoid using over-the-counter medications.







Chapter Twenty-oneToC

THE VENEREAL DISEASES

Derivation of Word "Venereal"—Three Venereal Diseases—Innocent Contraction of Syphilis Through Various Objects—The Hygienic Elimination of Common Sources of Venereal Infection—Measures for Prevention After Sexual Relations.

Derivation of the word "Venereal"—Three Venereal Diseases—Innocent transmission of Syphilis through various objects—The hygienic removal of common sources of venereal infection—Prevention measures after sexual relations.


The word "venereal" means pertaining to sexual intercourse: venereal excess—excess in sexual intercourse; venereal disease—a disease acquired from sexual intercourse with an infected person. The word is derived from Venus (genitive—veneris), the Roman goddess of spring, flowers and Love.

The word "venereal" refers to anything related to sexual intercourse: venereal excess—excessive sexual activity; venereal disease—a disease contracted through sexual intercourse with an infected person. The term comes from Venus (genitive—veneris), the Roman goddess of spring, flowers, and love.

There are three venereal diseases: gonorrhea, syphilis and chancroid. Of these, gonorrhea is the most widespread, syphilis the most serious. Chancroid is of comparatively little importance.

There are three sexually transmitted diseases: gonorrhea, syphilis, and chancroid. Of these, gonorrhea is the most common, syphilis is the most severe. Chancroid is relatively insignificant.

While by far the greatest amount of venereal diseases—probably ninety per cent, of the total—is contracted from illicit[7] intercourse, it is well to bear in mind that some of it is contracted innocently, either from a kiss, or from using a sponge or a towel [150]which has been used by an infected person, etc. While the gonorrheal germ is generally transmitted directly, the syphilitic poison may be transmitted through various objects. Syphilis contracted not during intercourse, but in an innocent manner, from a kiss, a towel, a toothbrush, a razor, etc., is called syphilis of the innocent, or syphilis insontium. In former years doctors would not very rarely contract syphilis from examining syphilitic women with their bare fingers. Now since gloves have come into use for examining purposes, the number of infections has considerably diminished. And no doubt that as the people become more familiar with the danger of venereal infection from non-venereal sources, the number of innocent infections will greatly diminish. The dangerous roller towel and the no less dangerous common drinking cup are being gradually eliminated as factors of non-venereal infection; and we may confidently expect that in a decade or two the amount of venereal disease from venereal infection will be greatly lessened in all civilized countries. The general increase in cleanliness in all strata of society and the universal use of antiseptics after suspicious sexual relations will constitute the chief factors in this diminution of venereal disease.

While the majority of sexually transmitted diseases—probably about ninety percent of the total—are contracted from illegal sexual relationships, it's important to remember that some can be caught innocently, whether from a kiss, or by using a sponge or towel [150] that has been used by an infected person, and so on. While the gonorrhea germ is usually spread directly, the syphilis bacteria can be transmitted through various objects. Syphilis that is contracted not during sexual intercourse, but in a harmless way, from a kiss, a towel, a toothbrush, a razor, etc., is referred to as syphilis of the innocent, or syphilis insontium. In the past, doctors would often contract syphilis from examining infected women with their bare hands. Since gloves have become standard for examinations, the number of infections has significantly decreased. And undoubtedly, as people become more aware of the risk of sexually transmitted infections from non-sexual sources, the rate of innocent infections will also drop. The dangerous roller towel and the equally hazardous communal drinking cup are gradually being eliminated as causes of non-venereal infection; we can confidently expect that in a decade or two, the amount of sexually transmitted diseases from venereal infection will be greatly reduced in all developed countries. The overall increase in cleanliness across all levels of society and the widespread use of antiseptics after potentially risky sexual encounters will be the main factors in this reduction of sexually transmitted diseases.




FOOTNOTES:

[7] Illicit—illegal, non-permissible, outside of marriage.

[7] Illegal—against the law, not allowed, outside of marriage.







Chapter Twenty-twoToC

THE EXTENT OF VENEREAL DISEASE

Former Ban on Discussion of Venereal Disease and Its Evil Results—Present Reprehensible Exaggerations of Extent of Venereal Disease—Erroneous and Ridiculous Statements of "Reformers"—Senseless Fear of Marriage in Girls Due to Lurid Exaggerations—Study by Woman Psychologist Reveals Harmful Results of Exaggerated Statements—Truth in Regard to Percentage of Men Afflicted with Venereal Disease.

Former Ban on Discussing STDs and Their Negative Effects—Current Unjustified Exaggerations of the Prevalence of STDs—False and Absurd Claims by "Reformers"—Irrational Fear of Marriage in Young Women Due to Sensational Exaggerations—Research by a Female Psychologist Shows Harmful Effects of Overstated Claims—Facts About the Percentage of Men Affected by STDs.


Former Silence. Only a very few years ago respectable women, by which I mean all women outside of the women called "fallen," did not know of the existence of venereal disease. It was considered a prohibited, disgraceful subject, not to be mentioned or even hinted at in conversation, in books or magazines, in lectures, or on the stage. When I say that they did not know of the existence of such a thing as venereal disease, that the very words gonorrhea and syphilis were unknown to them, I use these expressions not as figures of speech, but in their literal meaning. All avenues of acquiring such knowledge being closed to them—lay people don't usually now and they surely didn't then purchase and read strictly medical works—where could they obtain [152]the information? The result was that when a woman was so unfortunate as to contract a venereal disease from her husband, she did not understand its character and did not suspect its source. Which was a rather good thing—for the husband. Family peace was more secure.

Former Silence. Just a few years ago, respectable women—meaning all women except those labeled "fallen"—were unaware of venereal disease. It was seen as a taboo and shameful topic that couldn’t be discussed or even hinted at in conversations, books, magazines, lectures, or on stage. When I say they didn’t know about the existence of venereal diseases, that the terms gonorrhea and syphilis were completely unfamiliar to them, I mean it literally, not as a figure of speech. With all ways to gain such knowledge closed off—ordinary people don’t usually buy and read strict medical texts, and they certainly didn’t back then—where could they get [152]the information? As a result, when a woman happened to contract a venereal disease from her husband, she didn’t understand what it was and didn’t suspect where it came from. This was somewhat beneficial—for the husband. Family harmony was more stable.

Present Exaggerations. Now a change has taken place in this respect, and, as is often the case with recent changes, the pendulum has swung to the other extreme. The silence of former days has given place to shouting from the housetops. The last phrase is also used almost in its literal sense. Many men and women, deeply stirred by the venereal peril, and sincerely anxious to guard boys and girls from venereal infection, have been indulging in very reprehensible exaggerations. Particularly lurid have been the exaggerations as to the prevalence of the disease in the male sex, with its consequent disastrous effects on married women. A statement made by a Dr. Noeggerath (a German physician who practiced at the time in New York), nearly half a century ago, to the effect that 80 per cent, of all men have gonorrhea and that 90 per cent. of these remain uncured and infect or are apt to infect their wives, has been shown to be a ridiculously absurd exaggeration. If it had been true, the race would now be at the point of dying out. Nevertheless, this statement is copied [153]from book to book, as if it were gospel truth, as if it were a scientifically and statistically established fact instead of a wild, sensational guess. An esteemed New York physician, Dr. Prince A. Morrow, did excellent pioneer work in calling attention to the dangers of venereal disease. But, as is the case with so many "reformers," he permitted his zeal to run away with him occasionally, and he made statements which caused and are still causing the judicious to grieve. The statement, for instance, that there is more venereal disease among innocent, virtuous wives than among prostitutes is one to cause the real honest investigator to weep (over the human tendency to exaggeration), or to burst out in uproarious laughter. The ridiculousness of this statement becomes especially evident when we recollect that the same gentleman made the statement that every prostitute, without exception, was diseased at one time or another. If venereal disease exists among prostitutes to the extent of 100 per cent., then how can it exist to a greater extent among innocent, virtuous wives? And to still further emphasize the absurdity of the above statement, I will tell you that the extent of venereal disease among married women is believed by careful non-sensational venereologists not to exceed five per cent.!

Present Exaggerations. Now there's been a shift in this area, and as often happens with recent changes, it has swung to the opposite extreme. The quiet of the past has turned into shouting from the rooftops. Many men and women, deeply concerned about the risks of sexually transmitted infections, and genuinely wanting to protect boys and girls from these infections, have been making some very questionable exaggerations. The claims regarding the prevalence of the disease among men, and its disastrous effects on married women, have been particularly exaggerated. A statement made nearly fifty years ago by Dr. Noeggerath, a German doctor practicing in New York, claimed that 80 percent of all men have gonorrhea and that 90 percent of these remain untreated and are likely to infect their wives. This has been proven to be a ridiculously absurd exaggeration. If it were true, the human race would be on the verge of extinction. However, this statement continues to be repeated [153] from book to book as if it were absolute truth, as if it were scientifically and statistically verified rather than a wild, sensational guess. An esteemed physician in New York, Dr. Prince A. Morrow, did important work in highlighting the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases. But, like many "reformers," his enthusiasm sometimes got the better of him, leading him to make statements that cause, and still cause, the discerning to lament. For instance, the claim that there is a higher rate of venereal disease among innocent, virtuous wives than among sex workers is enough to make a truly honest researcher either weep (over the human tendency to exaggerate) or laugh out loud. The absurdity of this statement is especially clear when we remember that the same individual claimed every sex worker, without exception, had been infected at some point. If venereal disease exists among sex workers at a rate of 100 percent, how can it exist at a higher rate among innocent, virtuous wives? To further highlight the ridiculousness of the previous statement, it's believed by careful, non-sensational experts in sexually transmitted diseases that the rate of such diseases among married women does not exceed five percent!

Yes, the silence of former years has given place [154]to the lurid exaggeration of the present day. While on the whole the former was worse than the latter, the latter is bad enough, because it makes many girls unhappy, sowing in them the seeds of suspicion and cynicism, tends to make them antagonistic to the entire male sex, and inoculates them with a senseless fear of marriage. A study made by Miriam C. Gould, of the department of psychology and philosophy in the University of Pittsburg (Social Hygiene, April, 1916), corroborates our remarks in a striking manner.

Yes, the silence of previous years has given way to the shocking exaggerations of today. While the past was generally worse than now, the present situation is still troubling, as it makes many girls unhappy, planting seeds of suspicion and cynicism in them. It tends to turn them against all men and fills them with an irrational fear of marriage. A study by Miriam C. Gould from the department of psychology and philosophy at the University of Pittsburgh (Social Hygiene, April 1916) strongly supports our observations.

She has had confidential chats with 50 young girls, with whom she has had some acquaintance; of these 50, 25 were college students and 25 were not. She asked them a number of questions, the purpose of which was to find out what psychologic effect, if any, their knowledge of prostitution and of venereal disease has had on them. She states in her conclusions that "the histories reveal a large percentage of harmful results, such as conditions bordering upon neurasthenia, melancholia, pessimism and sex antagonism (italics mine), directly traceable to this knowledge. Eleven of the girls interviewed developed a pronounced repulsion for men, although prior to their 'knowledge' they had enjoyed men's company. They now avoid association with them, and six have declared that they have totally lost faith [155]in the moral cleanness of men. Eight have already refused to marry, or intend to do so, because of their belief that the risk of infection was too great. If it were not for the existence of these diseases, they say they would be glad to marry. All of these say their decision has rendered them more or less unhappy."

She has had private conversations with 50 young girls she knows to some extent; among these 50, 25 were college students and 25 were not. She asked them several questions to understand what psychological impact, if any, their awareness of prostitution and sexually transmitted diseases has had on them. In her conclusions, she states that "the stories show a significant percentage of harmful effects, such as conditions bordering on neurasthenia, depression, pessimism, and sex antagonism (italics mine), directly linked to this knowledge. Eleven of the girls interviewed developed a strong aversion to men, even though before they gained that 'knowledge' they had enjoyed being around them. They now avoid spending time with men, and six have stated that they have completely lost faith [155]in men's moral integrity. Eight have already declined marriage or plan to do so, due to their belief that the risk of infection is too high. They say that if it weren't for these diseases, they would be happy to marry. All of them report that their decision has made them more or less unhappy."

In the laudable desire to keep our young women pure and to protect them from infection, in the endeavor to make them demand one moral standard for both sexes, our exaggerating reformers are condemning them to lifelong celibacy, which in the case of women often means lifelong neurasthenia and hypochondria.

In the admirable effort to keep our young women wholesome and protect them from harm, and in the attempt to ensure they demand the same moral standards for both men and women, our overzealous reformers are sentencing them to a life without marriage, which for women often translates to a life of anxiety and depression.

The Truth of the Matter. Here is the Truth about venereal disease—the truth as I know it, without concealment on the one hand and without exaggeration on the other. Exact figures are, of course, unobtainable anywhere; but results obtained from unbiased investigations of different classes of society, from hospital reports, from questionnaires among students, etc., tell us that probably about twenty per cent. of the adult male population are the victims of gonorrhea at one time or another; that probably eight or ten per cent. are not entirely cured when they enter matrimony; and four or five per cent. (some would say two per cent.) of wives become infected with gonorrhea. This, I say, is terrible [156]enough, and makes the greatest care and caution imperative; for, if you should be one of the victims of the two or five per cent., it would be little consolation to you that the other ninety-eight or ninety-five per cent. of wives have escaped.

The Truth of the Matter. Here’s the truth about venereal disease—the truth as I see it, without hiding anything on one side and without blowing it out of proportion on the other. Exact numbers are, of course, hard to come by; but findings from impartial studies across different social classes, hospital reports, surveys of students, and so on, indicate that about twenty percent of adult men experience gonorrhea at some point; that maybe eight to ten percent aren’t completely cured when they get married; and four to five percent (some might argue two percent) of wives contract gonorrhea. This, I say, is quite serious [156] and makes taking care and being cautious absolutely necessary; because if you end up among the two or five percent who are affected, it won’t be much comfort knowing that the other ninety-eight or ninety-five percent of wives have stayed healthy.

Of course the percentage of venereal disease among young men, and afterwards among their wives, will vary greatly with the stratum of society. Among the "lower" strata you may find fifty per cent. of infection, with a very large percentage of those uncured. Not because they are of a lower morality than the higher classes, but because the cheap class of prostitutes that they are obliged to patronize are frequently diseased and because they cannot afford expert treatment, or any treatment at all. Among these classes you will naturally find a much larger percentage of diseased wives. But then to counteract this we must bear in mind that there are large classes of men in whom gonorrhea exists only to the extent of five or ten per cent., and we have large classes of wives among whom the victims of gonorrhea will come up only to a fraction of one per cent.

Of course, the rate of sexually transmitted infections among young men, and later their wives, varies significantly across different social classes. In the "lower" classes, you might see infection rates as high as fifty percent, with a very large number of those cases left untreated. This isn't because they have lower morals than higher classes, but rather because the inexpensive prostitutes they have to use are often infected, and they cannot afford proper medical care, or any care at all. In these groups, you will naturally find a much larger percentage of infected wives. However, it's important to remember that there are many groups of men where gonorrhea only affects five to ten percent of them, and among their wives, the cases of gonorrhea might be less than one percent.

The above figures, you see, differ materially from the statements found in so many sex books that "80 per cent. of all married men in New York have gonorrhea," and that "at least three out of every five [157][60 per cent.!] married women in New York have gonorrhea." Whenever you read or hear such a statement treat it with a smile—or with contempt, as all false statements should be treated.

The figures above, as you can see, are very different from the claims found in many sex books that "80% of all married men in New York have gonorrhea," and that "at least three out of every five [157][60%!] married women in New York have gonorrhea." Whenever you read or hear such statements, respond with a smile—or with disdain, as you should with all false statements.

As to syphilis, the extent of the prevalence may be given as between two and five per cent. Which percentage differs considerable from the 75, 50 or 25 per cent. given us by some sex lecturers, but which is terrible enough as it is, without any exaggerations.

As for syphilis, its prevalence is estimated to be between two and five percent. This percentage is significantly lower than the 75, 50, or 25 percent claimed by some sex educators, but it's still alarming enough without any exaggeration.







Chapter Twenty-threeToC

GONORRHEA

Source of Gonorrhea—Mucous Membrane of Genital Organs and of Eye Principal Seats of Disease—Symptoms in Men and in Women—Vagina Seldom Attacked in Adults—Nobody Inherits Gonorrhea—Ophthalmia Neonatorum—Differences of Course of Disease in Men and Women—Gonorrhea Less Painful in Women—Symptoms not Suspected by Woman—Necessity for the Woman Consulting a Physician—Self-treatment When Woman Cannot Consult Physician—Formulæ for Injections.

Source of Gonorrhea—Mucous Membrane of Genital Organs and the Eye Main Areas Affected by the Disease—Symptoms in Men and Women—Vagina Rarely Affected in Adults—Gonorrhea is Not Inherited—Newborn Eye Inflammation—Differences in Disease Progression in Men and Women—Gonorrhea is Less Painful in Women—Symptoms Often Go Unnoticed by Women—Importance of Women Seeing a Doctor—Self-Treatment When Women Can't Consult a Doctor—Injection Formulas.


The subject of gonorrhea and syphilis is treated pretty fully, from a layman's point of view, in the author's Sex Knowledge for Men. I do not intend to devote much space to a discussion of the details of these two diseases here, because the subject is not of such direct interest to women. Respectable girls and women do not indulge in illicit relations the same as respectable men and boys do, and their danger of contracting a venereal disease is insignificant as compared with men's liability. I will, therefore, touch upon only a few points, particularly insofar as the diseases differ in their course from the course pursued in men. Those, however, who are interested may read the chapters on the subject in [159]the author's Sex Knowledge for Men, and if they want still fuller details, they may study the author's Treatment of Gonorrhea and Its Complications in Men and Women.

The topic of gonorrhea and syphilis is covered pretty thoroughly, from a non-expert's perspective, in the author's Sex Knowledge for Men. I don’t plan to spend much time discussing the details of these two diseases here, as the topic isn't as relevant to women. Respectable girls and women don’t engage in illegal relationships the same way respectable men and boys do, so their risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection is much lower compared to men’s risk. Therefore, I will only highlight a few points, especially regarding how these diseases differ in their progression in women compared to men. Those who are interested can read the chapters on the topic in [159]the author's Sex Knowledge for Men, and if they want more detailed information, they can check out the author's Treatment of Gonorrhea and Its Complications in Men and Women.

Gonorrheal Germs

Gonorrheal Germs.

Gonorrhea bacteria.

Gonorrhea is an inflammation caused by a germ called the gonococcus, discovered by Dr. A. Neisser, of Breslau, Germany, in 1879. Any mucous membrane may be the seat of gonorrhea, but it attacks by preference the mucous membrane of the genital organs, and of one other organ—the eye. Its principal symptoms are: inflammation, pain, burning and discharge. In men, it attacks the urethra; in women it attacks the cervix—the neck of the womb—the urethra, and the vulva. The vagina is seldom attacked in adult women, because the mucous membrane of the adult vagina is rather tough and does not offer a good soil for the development of the gonococcus germ. The discharge that a woman has when she has gonorrhea comes principally or exclusively from the neck of the womb. In little girls, however, in whom the lining of the vagina is tender, gonorrhea of the vagina and the vulva is common. (See chapter Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls.) Gonorrhea is a local disease. [160]While in some cases, after the disease has lasted for some time, a certain poison is generated by the germs which circulates in the blood, and while the germs may occasionally wander into distant organs, still in 98 per cent. of all cases gonorrhea is a local disease, and if taken in time is cured without leaving any traces on the general organism.

Gonorrhea is an infection caused by a germ called gonococcus, which was discovered by Dr. A. Neisser from Breslau, Germany, in 1879. It can affect any mucous membrane, but it primarily targets the mucous membrane of the genital organs and, to a lesser extent, the eye. Its main symptoms include inflammation, pain, burning, and discharge. In men, it primarily affects the urethra; in women, it impacts the cervix (the neck of the womb), the urethra, and the vulva. The vagina is rarely affected in adult women because its mucous membrane is relatively tough and doesn’t provide a suitable environment for the gonococcus germ to thrive. The discharge a woman experiences during gonorrhea mainly comes from the cervix. However, in young girls, where the lining of the vagina is more delicate, gonorrhea of the vagina and vulva is more common. (See chapter Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls.) Gonorrhea is considered a localized disease. [160] In some cases, after the infection has persisted for a while, a certain toxin produced by the germs can enter the bloodstream, and the germs may sometimes spread to other organs. However, in 98 percent of cases, gonorrhea remains a localized disease, and if treated promptly, it can be cured without causing any lasting effects on the overall body.

Gonorrhea Not Hereditary. Then, gonorrhea is not a hereditary disease. Nobody ever inherits gonorrhea. A child may be born with a gonorrheal inflammation of the eyes (ophthalmia neonatorum), but this inflammation is not inherited; it can only be acquired if the mother is suffering with gonorrhea while the child is being born: some of the pus in the mother's birth canal gets into the child's eyes while it passes through the uterus and vagina. This is not heredity; this is simple infection, and can be avoided by keeping the mother's birth canal clean by antiseptic douches before childbirth. In short, I repeat gonorrhea is essentially a local and not a constitutional disease, and is not hereditary. In which two respects it differs from syphilis, which is the most constitutional and most hereditary of all diseases.

Gonorrhea Not Hereditary. So, gonorrhea is not a hereditary disease. No one ever inherits gonorrhea. A child may be born with a gonorrheal infection in the eyes (ophthalmia neonatorum), but this infection is not inherited; it can only be acquired if the mother has gonorrhea at the time of childbirth: some of the pus from the mother's birth canal can enter the child's eyes as they pass through the uterus and vagina. This is not heredity; this is simply an infection, which can be prevented by keeping the mother's birth canal clean with antiseptic douches prior to delivery. In short, I emphasize that gonorrhea is primarily a local infection and not a constitutional disease, and it is not hereditary. In these two ways, it is different from syphilis, which is the most constitutional and most hereditary of all diseases.

Course of Gonorrhea in Men and Women. Gonorrhea runs an entirely different course in women than it does in men. When a man has gonorrhea he [161]knows it immediately; first, because the discharge tells him that there is something the matter with him, for a man is not used to having any discharge from the urethra unless there is something the matter with him. Second, the urine becomes at once burning and painful. In women the urethra is a separate canal from the vagina, and the urethra is very frequently not affected in gonorrhea. The infection generally starts in the cervix, and the disease may last for considerable time before the woman becomes aware of it. In general, gonorrhea is a less painful disease in woman, and this is a bad thing, because she thus neglects treatment and loses valuable time, permitting the disease to develop. Even when the urethra is affected in women, it does not give as severe symptoms as inflammation of the urethra in men. If the woman does have pains she often pays no attention to them, because woman is used to pains; as we have seen before, fifty per cent. of all women suffer more or less with dysmenorrhea. Many of them have a leucorrheal discharge of greater or lesser degree, and therefore if there is an increase in the pains, or an increase in the discharge, little attention is paid to the matter. In fact, a woman may have a chronic gonorrhea for months or years without being aware that there is anything the matter with her. It is important to [162]teach women to seek medical aid as soon as they notice any increase in the amount of the discharge, or change in color, particularly if it becomes greenish, or if the odor becomes offensive, or if there is chafing, burning, or irritation around the genitals, and particularly if there is an increase in the frequency or urgency of urination, or if there is a burning, scalding, or cutting sensation during the act of urination. Also whenever the sexual act becomes painful. If women consulted a physician as soon as they noticed any of the symptoms referred to above, they would save months and years of suffering and expense, because the disease would often be taken in hand while still limited to the cervix, and not, as is now often the case, after the inflammation has extended into the uterus and Fallopian tubes.

Course of Gonorrhea in Men and Women. Gonorrhea has a completely different progression in women compared to men. When a man has gonorrhea, he [161]knows it right away; first, because the discharge alerts him that something is wrong, since men don’t usually experience any discharge from the urethra unless there’s an issue. Second, urination becomes immediately painful and burning. In women, the urethra is a separate canal from the vagina, and the urethra is often not affected by gonorrhea. The infection typically begins in the cervix, and the disease can persist for a significant amount of time before a woman realizes it. Generally, gonorrhea is less painful for women, which is problematic because it leads them to delay treatment and miss critical time, allowing the disease to progress. Even when the urethra is affected in women, the symptoms are not as severe as those of urethral inflammation in men. If a woman does experience pain, she often ignores it because women are accustomed to discomfort; as noted earlier, fifty percent of all women experience some level of dysmenorrhea. Many women may have a leucorrheal discharge to varying degrees, so if the pain or discharge increases, they often don’t pay much attention. In fact, a woman might have chronic gonorrhea for months or even years without realizing there’s a problem. It’s crucial to [162]teach women to seek medical help as soon as they notice any increase in discharge, changes in color—especially if it turns greenish—or if there’s an unpleasant odor, chafing, burning, or irritation around the genitals, particularly if they experience more frequent or urgent urination, or burning, scalding, or stinging sensations during urination. Also, they should consult a doctor if sexual intercourse becomes painful. If women consulted a physician as soon as they noticed any of these symptoms, they could avoid months or years of suffering and expense, because the disease could often be managed while still confined to the cervix, rather than, as is often the case now, after the inflammation has spread to the uterus and Fallopian tubes.

Self-treatment. I do not believe in self-treatment because it is generally unsatisfactory and may often even become dangerous, and I decidedly advise every woman who suspects that she has contracted gonorrhea to apply at once to a competent physician. But it happens not infrequently that a woman is so situated that she cannot consult a physician. And in the meantime there is danger of the gonorrhea spreading further and further. In such cases it is advisable for the woman to use an injection until such time when she can consult a physician. The [163]injection I am going to advise may in itself produce a cure; and, if it does not produce a complete cure, it at any rate improves the condition, prevents the extension of the disease, makes subsequent treatment easier, and besides is perfectly harmless. The best injection for self use in gonorrhea is tincture of iodine; the proportion is two teaspoonfuls to a quart or two quarts of water. If the case is very bad, such an injection may be taken twice a day. If the case is not very bad, once a day is sufficient. After using the tincture of iodine for five days to a week, it is good to change off to lactic acid. Buy a pint or so of lactic acid in a drug store, and use one tablespoonful to a quart of water. It is preferable to have the water hot, about 100 deg., but where this is inconvenient it may be used lukewarm. The lactic acid injection is used for three days, then the iodine injection is resumed, then again the lactic acid, and so on. I know of many cases that were cured by this treatment alone. And I might mention that these injections are generally also very efficient in leucorrhea, as stated in the chapter on Leucorrhea.

Self-treatment. I don’t believe in self-treatment because it’s usually ineffective and can often be dangerous. I strongly advise any woman who thinks she might have gonorrhea to see a qualified doctor immediately. However, there are times when a woman can’t reach a doctor, and meanwhile, there’s a risk of the gonorrhea spreading. In such cases, it’s a good idea for her to use an injection until she can consult a physician. The [163] injection I'm recommending might actually cure the condition; and even if it doesn’t completely resolve it, it at least improves the symptoms, stops the disease from getting worse, makes future treatment easier, and is completely safe. The best injection for self-use in treating gonorrhea is tincture of iodine; mix two teaspoonfuls with one or two quarts of water. If the situation is severe, this injection can be used twice a day. If it’s not too serious, once a day is enough. After using the tincture of iodine for five days to a week, it’s advisable to switch to lactic acid. Purchase about a pint of lactic acid from a drugstore, and mix one tablespoonful with a quart of water. It’s better to use hot water, around 100 degrees, but lukewarm water is fine if that’s more convenient. The lactic acid injection should be used for three days, then switch back to the iodine injection, then lactic acid again, and so on. I know of many cases that were cured with just this treatment. And I should also mention that these injections are generally effective for leucorrhea, as discussed in the chapter on Leucorrhea.







Chapter Twenty-fourToC

VULVOVAGINITIS IN LITTLE GIRLS

Former Causes of Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls—Discharge Chief Symptom—Evil Results of Vulvovaginitis—Psychic Results of Treatment—Effects in Hastening Sexual Maturity—Vulvovaginitis a Cause of Permanent Sterility—Measures to Prevent the Disease—Toilet Seats and Vulvovaginitis.

Former Causes of Vulvovaginitis in Little Girls—Discharge as the Main Symptom—Negative Consequences of Vulvovaginitis—Psychological Effects of Treatment—Impact on Early Sexual Maturity—Vulvovaginitis as a Cause of Permanent Infertility—Prevention Measures—Toilet Seats and Vulvovaginitis.


The mucous membrane, or the lining of the vulva and vagina, in little girls is very tender, and therefore very readily subject to infection. An infection of the vulva and vagina due to the gonococcus or to some other germ is very common in little girls. At least it used to be, particularly among children of the poor, in institutions and hospitals. The very dangerous infective character of vulvovaginitis was not known, and the infection was therefore easily transferred by towels, linen, toilet seats, bedpans, syringe nozzles, thermometers, the nurses' hands, and in various other ways. Now great care is being taken and in most hospitals no children are admitted in the general wards unless it is determined that they are free from vulvovaginitis.

The mucous membrane, or the lining of the vulva and vagina, in young girls is very delicate, making it very susceptible to infection. Infections of the vulva and vagina caused by the gonococcus or other germs were quite common in little girls, especially among poorer children, in institutions and hospitals. The serious infectious nature of vulvovaginitis wasn't understood, which allowed the infection to spread easily through towels, linens, toilet seats, bedpans, syringe tips, thermometers, nurses' hands, and various other means. Now, great care is taken, and in most hospitals, children are not admitted to general wards unless it's confirmed that they are free from vulvovaginitis.

Generally speaking, vulvovaginitis in children is [165]a mild infection. A child may have it for several weeks or months without being aware of it, without saying anything about it, the diagnosis often being made by the mother, who begins to notice the creamy discharge on the girl's linen or underwear. And this is the principal symptom in little girls thus afflicted—the discharge. This discharge may be very profuse, covering the vulva, vagina, and cervix.

Generally speaking, vulvovaginitis in children is [165]a mild infection. A child may have it for several weeks or months without realizing it or mentioning it, with the diagnosis often made by the mother, who starts to notice the creamy discharge on the girl's linens or underwear. And this is the main symptom in little girls who have it—the discharge. This discharge can be quite abundant, covering the vulva, vagina, and cervix.

In severe cases, there is also an infection of the urethra, and the child may complain of burning at urination, itching and pain around the vulva and anus, and slight pain in the abdomen. There may be a moderate rise in temperature, up to 101 deg. F., and in some instances the attack is sufficiently acute to give rise to a chill and fever. A mild inflammation of the joints may set in within the first weeks of the infection, although as a usual thing it comes later on.

In severe cases, there can also be an infection of the urethra, and the child may report a burning sensation during urination, itching and pain around the vulva and anus, and slight abdominal pain. There might be a moderate rise in temperature, up to 101°F, and in some cases, the episode is severe enough to cause chills and fever. A mild inflammation of the joints may occur within the first few weeks of the infection, although it typically appears later.

Evil Sequelæ of Vulvovaginitis. While, as stated, vulvovaginitis is a comparatively mild infection as far as its symptoms are concerned, it nevertheless has a very bad effect on the child who is unfortunate enough to become a victim of the disease. First of all, it is an extremely long drawn, persistent disease. It usually takes months, and these months may run into years, before a complete cure, is effected. Second, relapses are quite common. Third, [166]the treatment is a disagreeable one for the child, and is occasionally painful. Fourth, it has a disastrous effect on the child's morale; most parents, though they may love the child most affectionately, look somewhat askance at it; and continuous vaginal treatment somehow or other has a humiliating effect on the child, which begins to consider itself as an outcast, as something apart from other children. Fifth, the child's education is very frequently seriously and permanently interfered with, because it must often be taken out of school, whether public or private, and private tutoring is of course feasible only for the few. Sixth, and this is a point not sufficiently appreciated by the profession and the laity, but it is an important point, nevertheless: vulvovaginitis in children has unfortunately a disastrous effect in hastening the sexual maturity of the child. Whether this is due to the congestion of the organs produced by the inflammation, or to the speculum examinations, paintings, douches, applications, tampons, suppositories, etc., the fact remains that girls who suffer from vulvovaginitis in childhood become sexually mature considerably earlier than normal girls of the same class, stratum and climate, and their demand for sexual satisfaction is much more insistent. Seventh, a mild vulvovaginitis may be the cause of permanent sterility.

Evil Consequences of Vulvovaginitis. While vulvovaginitis is a relatively mild infection in terms of symptoms, it still has a very negative impact on the child unfortunate enough to suffer from it. First, it's a long-lasting and persistent condition. It often takes months, sometimes even years, to achieve a complete cure. Second, relapses are quite common. Third, [166] the treatment can be unpleasant for the child and sometimes painful. Fourth, it significantly affects the child's morale; many parents, despite their deep love for the child, might look at them with concern. Continuous vaginal treatment can be humiliating for the child, making them feel like an outcast, separate from their peers. Fifth, the child's education is often seriously and permanently disrupted, as they may need to be taken out of school, whether public or private, and private tutoring is only an option for a few. Sixth, and this is a point not fully recognized by both the medical community and the general public, vulvovaginitis in children can unfortunately accelerate the child's sexual maturity. Whether it's due to the congestion caused by inflammation or the various examinations and treatments like speculum exams, applications, and suppositories, the fact remains that girls who have vulvovaginitis during childhood tend to reach sexual maturity significantly earlier than their peers in the same social group and environment, and their desire for sexual gratification is much stronger. Seventh, even a mild case of vulvovaginitis might lead to permanent sterility.

[167]It will therefore be seen that vulvovaginitis is a calamity, and everything possible should be done to guard female children from contracting it. All children should always sleep alone. Under no circumstances should a child sleep with anybody else, be it a sister, a mother, a friend, a governess, or a servant girl. People should be very careful in sending their children to spend a night or two with some friends. The friends may be all right, but still a friend of the friends or a relative of the friends may not be. I have known several cases where the origin of the vulvovaginitis could be traced to little girls spending a week at the house of some friends where a boarder or relative was infected with gonorrhea. That children should be kept away from associating or playing with adults or other children who are known to have gonorrheal infection goes without saying. The child's genitals should be frequently inspected by the mother, and scrupulous cleanliness by frequent bathing, sponging with warm solutions and powdering, should be maintained. The toilet seats in school should receive special attention. The wooden seat is a menace because it often harbors gonorrheal pus from either the female or male genitals, while the only proper seat is one of the so-called U-shaped style, that is, one in which the front is entirely open, like the letter U.

[167]It’s clear that vulvovaginitis is a serious issue, and everything possible should be done to protect young girls from getting it. All children should always sleep alone. Under no circumstances should a child share a bed with anyone else—whether it’s a sister, a mother, a friend, a governess, or a servant. People need to be very cautious when sending their children to stay with friends for a night or two. The friends might seem fine, but a friend of theirs or a relative could pose a risk. I have seen several cases where the source of the vulvovaginitis was traced back to little girls staying for a week at someone’s house where a boarder or relative had gonorrhea. It goes without saying that children should stay away from interacting or playing with adults or other kids known to have gonorrheal infections. Mothers should frequently check the child's genitals, and maintain strict cleanliness through regular bathing, sponging with warm solutions, and powdering. Special attention should be given to toilet seats in schools. Wooden seats can be a threat because they often harbor gonorrheal pus from either female or male genitals; the only proper seat is the U-shaped style, where the front is completely open, resembling the letter U.







Chapter Twenty-fiveToC

SYPHILIS

Syphilis Due to Germ—Syphilis a Constitutional Disease—Primary Lesion—Incubation Period—Roseola—Primary Stage—Secondary Stage—Mucous Patches—Tertiary Stage—Gumma—Hereditary Nature of Syphilis—Milder Course in Women Than in Men—Obscure Symptoms in Syphilis—Necessity for Examination by Physician—Locomotor Ataxia—Softening of the Brain—Chancroids.

Syphilis Caused by Germs—Syphilis as a Systemic Disease—Initial Lesion—Incubation Period—Roseola—Primary Stage—Secondary Stage—Mucous Lesions—Tertiary Stage—Gumma—Genetic Nature of Syphilis—Less Severe in Women Than in Men—Subtle Symptoms of Syphilis—Need for Medical Examination—Locomotor Ataxia—Brain Softening—Chancroids.


Syphilis is a disease caused by a germ called spirocheta; the full name is spirocheta pallida—a pale, spiral-shaped germ. Though the disease has been ravaging Europe and America for centuries, [169]the germ of it has been discovered only a few years ago, namely, in 1905, and, like the gonococcus, also by a German scientist, Fritz Schaudinn. Syphilis is a constitutional disease. In ten days to three weeks after a person has contracted syphilis, he (or she) develops a sore (at the spot where the germs got in). This sore is called chancre or primary lesion. But when this sore makes its appearance the spirochetæ and the poison which they elaborate are already circulating in the blood, all over the system. The disease is already systemic, or constitutional, and the chancre is the local expression of a constitutional disease. Cutting out the chancre will not cure the disease, because, as stated, the germs are already in the system. The time between the contraction of the disease (the infectious intercourse) and the appearance of the chancre is called the Incubation Period. The time between the appearance of the chancre and the appearance of the rash on the body (the rash looks like a measles rash and is called roseola, which means a rose-colored rash) is called the Primary Stage. It lasts about six weeks. With the appearance of the rash commences the Secondary Stage. This stage is characterized by all sorts of eruptions, mild and severe, by white little patches (called mucous patches) in the throat, mouth, tonsils, vagina, by falling out of the hair, etc. The length of this [170]secondary stage depends a good deal upon the sort of treatment the patient gets. Improperly treated, or not treated at all, it may last two or three years or more. Properly treated, it may be cut short at once, in a few days, so that the patient may never again in his or her life get an eruption. The third or Tertiary Stage is characterized by ulcerations in various parts of the body and by swellings or tumors. The name of a syphilitic swelling or tumor is gumma (plural, gummata). The tertiary stage is the most terrible stage and it used to be the terror of syphilitic patients. But at the present time, under our modern methods of treatment, patients, if properly treated, never have a tertiary stage. We have seen many patients who considered syphilis a trifling disease, because all they knew of their disease was the chancre and the first eruption, i.e., the roseola, and perhaps a slight falling out of the hair. They then put themselves under energetic treatment, the activity of the disease was checked, and they never had another symptom afterwards, though a Wassermann test showed that the disease was not entirely eradicated. It was merely held in check—which is the second best thing.

Syphilis is a disease caused by a germ called spirocheta; its full name is spirocheta pallida—a pale, spiral-shaped germ. Although this disease has been affecting Europe and America for centuries, the germ responsible for it was only discovered a few years ago, specifically in 1905, by a German scientist named Fritz Schaudinn. Syphilis is a systemic disease. Typically, within ten days to three weeks after someone contracts syphilis, they develop a sore at the site of infection. This sore is known as a chancre or primary lesion. By the time this sore appears, the spirochetes and the toxins they produce are already circulating in the blood and throughout the body. The disease is systemic from the start, and the chancre is just a local sign of a systemic disease. Removing the chancre won’t cure the disease because, as mentioned, the germs are already present in the body. The time between contracting the disease (through infectious intercourse) and the development of the chancre is referred to as the Incubation Period. The period between the appearance of the chancre and the onset of a rash on the body (which resembles a measles rash and is called roseola, meaning a rose-colored rash) is known as the Primary Stage. This stage lasts about six weeks. Once the rash appears, the Secondary Stage begins. This stage is marked by various eruptions, both mild and severe, white patches (called mucous patches) in the throat, mouth, tonsils, or vagina, and hair loss, among other symptoms. The duration of this [170] secondary stage largely depends on the type of treatment the patient receives. If not treated properly, or if left untreated, it may last two or three years or longer. However, with proper treatment, it can be resolved quickly, sometimes in a few days, so the patient may never experience another eruption in their lifetime. The third or Tertiary Stage is marked by ulcerations in various body parts and by swellings or tumors. A syphilitic swelling or tumor is called a gumma (plural, gummata). The tertiary stage used to be the most dreaded phase for those with syphilis. However, today, with modern treatment methods, patients who receive appropriate care never experience a tertiary stage. We have encountered many patients who thought syphilis was a minor issue because their understanding of the disease was limited to the chancre and the initial eruption, namely, the roseola, along with perhaps slight hair loss. After starting intense treatment, the activity of the disease was controlled, and they never showed any further symptoms, even though a Wassermann test indicated that the disease was not completely gone. It was merely kept under control—which is the second-best outcome.

Germ of Syphilis.

Spirocheta Pallida, or Treponema Pallidum, the Germ of Syphilis as Seen under the Microscope.

Spirocheta Pallida, or Treponema Pallidum, the Germ of Syphilis as Seen under the Microscope.

As stated before, syphilis is the most hereditary of all diseases. Fortunately, if the disease is still very active in the parents, particularly in the [171]mother, the child is generally aborted. Some syphilitic mothers will have half a dozen or more miscarriages in succession. When the disease has become "attenuated," either by treatment or by itself—many diseases lose their virulence in time—the child may be carried to term. It then may be born dead, or it may be born strongly syphilitic, and die in a few days or weeks, or it may be born without any signs of syphilis and be apparently healthy and then develop the disease at the age of ten, twelve, fourteen, or later, or it may be born healthy and remain healthy. But no woman who had syphilis, or whose husband had syphilis, should dare to conceive or to give birth to a child unless she has been given permission by a competent physician. I mean just what I say. It is not a personal matter. A woman has a right to marry a syphilitic husband if she wants to and run the risk of contracting syphilis. Her body is her own, and if she does it with her eyes open it is her affair. But a woman has no right to bring into the world syphilitic or syphilitically tainted children. Here society has a right to interfere.

As mentioned earlier, syphilis is the most hereditary of all diseases. Fortunately, if the disease is still very active in the parents, especially in the [171]mother, the child is usually aborted. Some mothers with syphilis may experience half a dozen or more miscarriages in a row. When the disease has become "weakened," either through treatment or naturally—many diseases lose their severity over time—the child may be carried to term. It may then be born dead, it may be born with severe syphilis and die within a few days or weeks, or it might be born apparently healthy and later develop the disease at age ten, twelve, fourteen, or even later, or it may be born healthy and stay healthy. However, no woman who has syphilis, or whose husband has syphilis, should dare to conceive or give birth to a child unless she has been cleared by a qualified physician. I mean what I say. It’s not a personal matter. A woman has the right to marry a husband with syphilis if she chooses and take the risk of getting syphilis herself. Her body is her own, and if she makes that choice knowingly, it is her business. But a woman has no right to bring syphilitic or potentially syphilitic children into the world. Here society has the right to step in.

Syphilis runs a milder course in women than it does in men. But this milder course is not an unmixed blessing; it may be considered a misfortune, because, the same as gonorrhea in women, syphilis is often present for months and years until it has [172]made such inroads that it is but little amenable to treatment. In many women the disease runs such a mild course, as far as definite symptoms are concerned, that they are sure they never had anything the matter with them, and they are perfectly sincere in their denial of ever having had any infection. Often it is only when they complain of obscure symptoms, for which we can find no explanation, and then take a Wassermann test, that we discover what the real trouble is. And then the internal organs are sometimes found so deeply affected that it is hard to do anything. So it is seen that the mildness of the course of the disease, while a good thing in itself, is bad in that respect that it prevents timely treatment. It is therefore important that whenever a woman is in any way suspicious that she may have the disease that she have herself examined; and if she has reasons to suspect that her husband or partner has the disease, she should persuade him to have himself examined.

Syphilis tends to be less severe in women than in men. However, this milder form isn't entirely a good thing; it could be seen as unfortunate because, similar to gonorrhea in women, syphilis can go unnoticed for months or even years until it has progressed to a point where treatment is much more difficult. Many women experience such mild symptoms that they genuinely believe they've never had any health issues, and they sincerely deny ever having an infection. Often, it’s only when they report unusual symptoms that we can't explain, and then undergo a Wassermann test, that we uncover the actual problem. At that point, their internal organs may be significantly affected, making treatment challenging. Thus, while the mild nature of the disease seems beneficial, it hinders timely treatment. It's essential that whenever a woman suspects she might have the disease, she gets checked out; and if she has reason to believe her husband or partner is infected, she should encourage him to get examined.

Locomotor ataxia, one of the most terrible sequelæ of syphilis, is much more rare in women than it is in men. So is general paresis, also called general paralysis of the insane, or softening of the brain.

Locomotor ataxia, one of the most severe consequences of syphilis, is much less common in women than in men. The same goes for general paresis, also known as general paralysis of the insane or brain softening.


Chancroids

There is one other minor disease belonging to [173]the venereal diseases; that is chancroids. Chancroids are little ulcers on the genitals; they are purely local and do not affect the system. They are due largely to uncleanliness, and are found only among the poorer classes of prostitutes and therefore among the poorer classes of men. One sees them now and then in public dispensaries, but in private practice they are now quite rare. They used to be quite common, which shows that the general level of cleanliness has been raised considerably among all classes of people. At any rate, chancroids are of little significance, as compared with syphilis and gonorrhea, and when speaking of the venereal peril, these are the two diseases we have in mind.

There is one other minor disease that falls under the category of the venereal diseases: chancroids. Chancroids are small ulcers on the genitals; they are localized and do not affect the body overall. They are primarily caused by lack of hygiene and are mostly found among poorer classes of prostitutes, and therefore among poorer men as well. You can see them occasionally in public clinics, but they are quite rare in private practice now. They used to be fairly common, which indicates that overall hygiene has significantly improved among all social classes. In any case, chancroids are not very important compared to syphilis and gonorrhea, and when discussing venereal risks, these are the two diseases we focus on.







Chapter Twenty-sixToC

THE CURABILITY OF VENEREAL DISEASE

Gonorrhea May Be Practically Cured in Every Case in Man—Extensive Gonorrheal Infection in Woman Difficult to Cure—Positive Cure in Syphilis Impossible to Guarantee.

Gonorrhea can generally be cured in most men—widespread gonorrheal infection in women is hard to treat—guaranteeing a complete cure for syphilis is not possible.


Just as the usual statements in regard to the extent of venereal disease have been found untrue or greatly exaggerated, so do the statements regarding the curability or rather incurability of venereal disease need careful revision. The picture usually painted of the hopelessness of gonorrhea and syphilis is too sombre, too black, and, contrary to the assertions made by laymen and laywomen and physicians who do not specialize in the treatment of venereal disease, I wish to make the statement that every case of gonorrhea in man, without any exception, if properly treated, can be perfectly cured, as far as practical purposes are concerned. I add the last phrase because the cure may not be perfect in the scientific sense of the word; that is, the man may not be brought back into the condition in which he was before he got the disease. But, for all practical [175]purposes, as far as he himself is concerned, as far as his wife is concerned, and as far as the future children are concerned, every case may be cured, without any doubt. And I say this, basing myself upon a varied professional experience extending over nearly a quarter of a century.

Just as the usual statements about the prevalence of venereal disease have been shown to be false or exaggerated, the claims about the curability—or rather, the incurability—of venereal diseases need to be carefully reassessed. The common portrayal of gonorrhea and syphilis as hopeless is overly bleak and misleading. Contrary to what laypeople and doctors who don’t specialize in treating venereal disease say, I want to make it clear that every case of gonorrhea in men, without exception, can be completely cured if treated properly, for all practical purposes. I add that last phrase because the cure might not be perfect in the scientific sense; that is, the man might not be returned to the exact state he was in before contracting the disease. However, for all practical [175]purposes—regarding himself, his wife, and any future children—every case can indeed be cured, without any doubt. I say this based on my diverse professional experience, which spans nearly twenty-five years.

As to gonorrhea in women, that depends to a great extent upon the virulence of the disease and the promptness with which treatment is instituted. If the gonorrhea is limited only to the cervix, the vulva and the urethra, then prompt treatment will usually bring about a cure in a comparatively short time. But if the gonorrheal inflammation has extended to the body of the uterus, or still worse, to the tubes, then the treatment may become a very tedious one, and some cases may not be curable without an operation.

As for gonorrhea in women, it largely depends on how aggressive the infection is and how quickly treatment starts. If the gonorrhea is confined to the cervix, vulva, and urethra, then immediate treatment typically leads to a cure in a relatively short time. However, if the infection has spread to the uterus or, even worse, to the fallopian tubes, then treatment can take a long time, and some cases may only be treatable through surgery.

With syphilis the matter is different. Since the introduction by Ehrlich of the various arsenic preparations, we have much better success in the treatment of syphilis, and we can positively render every case non-infectious to the partner. But, as to guaranteeing a positive cure, that is, guaranteeing that the patient will never have an outbreak or relapse of his disease in the future, and that the children will be perfectly free from any taint, this we can do no more now than we could before the modern [176]treatment of syphilis was introduced. The decision, therefore, as to whether we may or may not permit a once syphilitic patient to marry will depend a great deal upon whether or no the husband or the wife or both desire to have children. If this is the case, we must often withhold our permission; but if the man and woman agree to get married and to get along without children, we will grant permission to the marriage in the vast majority of cases. The subject of venereal disease and marriage will be further discussed in separate chapters.

With syphilis, the situation is different. Since Ehrlich introduced various arsenic treatments, we’ve had much better success in treating syphilis, and we can definitely make every case non-infectious to the partner. However, guaranteeing a complete cure—meaning we can ensure the patient will never have another outbreak or relapse and that their children will be completely free of any infection—is something we can no longer promise any more than we could before modern [176] treatments were introduced. Therefore, whether we allow someone who was once syphilitic to marry will largely depend on whether the husband or wife, or both, want to have children. If that’s the case, we often have to withhold our permission; but if the couple agrees to marry and live without children, we will usually grant permission for the marriage. The topic of venereal disease and marriage will be discussed further in separate chapters.

Venereal disease, I have to repeat, is terrible enough in itself, without any exaggeration, without picturing it in too black colors. And it is necessary that people should not have too black an idea of it. It is necessary that they know that there are thousands and tens of thousands of patients who suffered with gonorrhea or syphilis and who were perfectly cured, who married, and whose wives remained perfectly well, and who gave birth to perfectly healthy untainted children.

Venereal disease, I have to emphasize, is serious enough on its own, without any exaggeration or painting it in overly dark terms. It's important for people not to have an overly negative perception of it. They should know that there are thousands and tens of thousands of patients who have dealt with gonorrhea or syphilis and who were completely cured, who got married, and whose partners stayed perfectly healthy, and who gave birth to completely healthy, untainted children.







Chapter Twenty-sevenToC

VENEREAL PROPHYLAXIS

Necessity for Douching Before and After Suspicious Intercourse—Formulæ for Douches—Precautions Against Non-venereal Sources of Infection—Syphilis Transmitted by Dentist's Instruments—Manicurists and Syphilis—Promiscuous Kissing a Source of Syphilitic Infection.

Necessity for Douching Before and After Suspicious Intercourse—Recipes for Douches—Precautions Against Non-venereal Sources of Infection—Syphilis Transmitted by Dentist's Tools—Manicurists and Syphilis—Kissing Randomly as a Source of Syphilitic Infection.


In his book, Sex Knowledge for Men, the author treated the subject of prevention of venereal disease very thoroughly. Men need this knowledge. As men will indulge in illicit relations, we must teach them to guard themselves against venereal infection. We must do it not only for their own sake, but for the sake of their wives and children. For, infection in the man may mean infection in his wife and children. But as women readers of this book are not likely to indulge in promiscuous relations with strangers, a detailed discussion of the subject would be out of place.

In his book, Sex Knowledge for Men, the author explored the prevention of sexually transmitted diseases in great detail. Men need this information. Since men will engage in risky relationships, we have to educate them on how to protect themselves against STIs. We need to do this not just for their benefit, but also for their wives and children. Because an infection in the man can lead to infections in his wife and kids. However, since women reading this book are unlikely to have casual relationships with strangers, an in-depth discussion on the topic wouldn’t be appropriate.

I will merely say, that where the woman has a suspicion that her husband is in an infectious state, she should abstain from relations with him until she is sure that he is safe. But where for some reason [178]a suspicions intercourse is indulged in, the woman should use an antiseptic douche before and after intercourse. Where it is inconvenient to use a douche both before and after, a douche after will have to suffice, but it is much safer and surer to use the douche both before and after. When you use a douche there is always some of the solution left in the vagina and that destroys wholly or in part the infective germs. The following makes an effective douche: Dissolve a tablet of bichloride (they come on the market of the weight of about 7½ grains) in two quarts of water—hot, lukewarm or cold. Use before intercourse a small amount—about a pint or half a pint, and use the balance after intercourse. Instead of the bichloride you may use a tablespoonful of carbolic acid, or two tablets of chinosol, or a tablespoonful of lysol, or two tablespoonfuls of boric acid.

I will just say that if a woman suspects her husband might be infected, she should avoid any sexual relations with him until she's certain he's safe. But if, for some reason, they have intimate contact despite her suspicions, she should use an antiseptic douche both before and after intercourse. If it's not practical to use a douche both times, using it after will have to do, but it's much safer and more effective to use it both before and after. When you use a douche, some of the solution will always remain in the vagina, which helps eliminate the infectious germs. An effective douche can be made by dissolving a bichloride tablet (they typically weigh about 7½ grains) in two quarts of water—whether hot, lukewarm, or cold. Use a small amount—about a pint or half a pint—before intercourse, and then use the rest afterward. Instead of bichloride, you can use a tablespoon of carbolic acid, two tablets of chinosol, a tablespoon of lysol, or two tablespoons of boric acid.

Instead of the douche an antiseptic jelly in a collapsible tin tube with a long nozzle may be used.

Instead of the douche, an antiseptic gel in a collapsible tube with a long applicator can be used.

But besides the venereal sources of infection the woman must guard against the non-venereal sources. Do not ever, if you can avoid it, use a public toilet. If you are forced to use it, protect yourself by putting some paper over the seat.

But in addition to the sexually transmitted sources of infection, a woman must also be careful about non-sexually transmitted ones. Try to avoid using public restrooms if possible. If you have to use one, protect yourself by placing some paper over the seat.

Do not use a public drinking cup. If you have to use one, keep your lips away from the rim. One [179]can learn to drink without touching the rim of the glass or cup with the lips.

Do not use a public drinking cup. If you must use one, keep your lips away from the edge. One [179] can learn to drink without touching the edge of the glass or cup with their lips.

Do not under any circumstances use a public towel. The roller towel is a menace to health and should be forbidden in every part of the country.

Do not, under any circumstances, use a public towel. The roller towel is a health hazard and should be banned everywhere in the country.

If you have to sleep in a hotel or in a strange bed, make sure that the linen is clean and fresh. Never sleep on bed linen which has been used by a stranger.

If you need to sleep in a hotel or an unfamiliar bed, make sure the sheets are clean and fresh. Never sleep on bed linens that have been used by someone else.

Never use a public brush or comb.

Never use a public brush or comb.

Be sure that your dentist is a careful, up-to-date man, and sterilizes his instruments carefully. Many a case of syphilis has been transmitted by a dentist's instrument. A syphilitic who goes to a dentist to be treated generally conceals his disease, and if the dentist is not in the habit of sterilizing his instruments after each patient, disaster may result.

Make sure your dentist is careful, knowledgeable, and properly sterilizes his tools. Many cases of syphilis have been passed on through a dentist's instruments. A patient with syphilis who visits a dentist often hides their condition, and if the dentist doesn’t sterilize his instruments after every patient, it can lead to serious consequences.

Be sure that your manicurist is not syphilitic, or at least that her hands are healthy, clean and free from any eruption.

Make sure your manicurist isn't dealing with syphilis, or at least that her hands are healthy, clean, and free from any rashes.

And, last but not least, do not indulge in promiscuous kissing. This is a particularly important injunction for young girls. This is a real peril and there are thousands of cases of syphilis that are known to have been contracted directly from kissing. People suffering with syphilis often have little white sores (mucous patches) on their lips, tongue and [180]inside of cheeks. These sores are very infectious, and by kissing the disease is readily transmitted. Kissing games have been responsible in more than one case for the spread of syphilis to many persons. I have now under treatment a girl of nineteen who contracted syphilis on her summer vacation from having kissed a man once. Avoid promiscuous kissing! It is a bad practice for more than one reason.

And last but not least, avoid kissing casually. This is especially important for young girls. It's a real risk, and there are thousands of cases of syphilis that have been traced directly back to kissing. People with syphilis often have little white sores (mucous patches) on their lips, tongue, and [180]inside of their cheeks. These sores are highly contagious, and kissing makes it easy for the disease to spread. Kissing games have led to the spread of syphilis in multiple instances. Right now, I’m treating a girl who’s nineteen; she got syphilis on her summer vacation after kissing a man just once. Steer clear of casual kissing! It's a harmful habit for a lot of reasons.







Chapter Twenty-eightToC

ALCOHOL, SEX AND VENEREAL DISEASE

Alcoholic Indulgence and Venereal Disease—A Champagne Dinner and Syphilis—Percentage of Cases of Venereal Infection Due to Alcohol—Artificial Stimulation of Sex Instinct in Man and in Woman—Reckless Sexual Indulgence Due to Alcohol—Alcohol as an Aid to Seduction.

Alcohol Consumption and Sexually Transmitted Infections—A Champagne Dinner and Syphilis—Percentage of Cases of Sexually Transmitted Infections Linked to Alcohol—Artificial Stimulation of Sexual Desire in Men and Women—Irresponsible Sexual Behavior Due to Alcohol—Alcohol as a Tool for Seduction.


That Bacchus, the god of wine, is the strongest ally of Venus, the goddess of love, using love in its physical sense, as the French use the word amour, has been well known to the ancient Greeks and Romans, as it is well known to-day to every saloon-keeper and every keeper of a disreputable house. And all measures to combat venereal disease and to prevent girls from making a false step will be only partially successful if we do not at the same time carry on a strong educational campaign against alcoholic indulgence. Of what use to young men is the knowledge of the venereal peril and familiarity with the use of venereal prophylactics, when under the influence of alcohol the mind is befuddled, they forget everything and do things that they never would do in the sober state? Of what use are [182]warnings to a girl, when under the influence of a heavy dinner and a bottle of champagne, to which she is unaccustomed, her passion is aroused to a degree she has never experienced before, her will is paralyzed and she yields, though deep down in her consciousness something tells her she shouldn't? Yields, becomes pregnant, and is in the deepest agony for several months, and has a wound which will probably never heal for the rest of her life? Of what use have all the lectures, books and maternal injunctions been to her?

That Bacchus, the god of wine, is Venus's strongest ally, connecting love in a physical sense, like the French use the word amour, has been well understood by the ancient Greeks and Romans, just as it is today by every bar owner and operator of a sketchy establishment. Any efforts to fight venereal diseases and prevent girls from making mistakes will only be partially effective if we don't also run a strong educational campaign against alcohol consumption. What good is it for young men to know about the risks of venereal disease and how to use protection when, under the influence of alcohol, their minds become clouded, they forget everything, and they do things they would never do when sober? What good are [182]warnings to a girl when a heavy meal and a bottle of champagne, which she isn't used to, ignite a passion she's never felt before, paralyzing her will and causing her to give in, even though deep down she knows she shouldn't? She gives in, becomes pregnant, and suffers deep emotional pain for months, carrying a wound that will likely never heal for the rest of her life. What have all the lectures, books, and motherly advice done for her?

Or this case. Here is a young lawyer, twenty-eight years of age, engaged to a fine girl, and with everything to look forward to. He always was very moderate and circumspect in his sexual indulgence, and, though careful in choosing his partners, he never failed to use a venereal prophylactic after intercourse. There was too much at stake for him, and he did not care to take any chances, even if the chances were one in a thousand. For a period of one year during which he had been engaged he abstained from sexual intercourse altogether, though it cost him a great deal of effort to do so. He was to be married very shortly. But ill-luck made him accept an invitation to a bachelor dinner, where champagne and smutty stories were flowing freely, too freely. He left about midnight, and as the night was [183]beautiful he decided to walk home. He met a siren, who invited him to accompany her. Under other circumstances he would have sent her on her way, or at least he would have stepped into a drugstore for a prophylactic. But, excited by the wine, the smutty stories and the year's abstinence, he went along like a sheep, as a matter of course, without trying to reason or interposing any objections. He remembers distinctly his feelings and the state of his mind. He was not drunk, only exhilarated, but nevertheless the whole thing seemed to him so normal, so natural, so expected, so matter-of-course, that he couldn't think of acting otherwise than accept her invitation. And he stayed two or three hours; and he used no prophylactic. And as a result—three weeks later he had a typical primary syphilitic lesion. How he felt and what it all meant to him the reader can imagine. This is far from being an isolated, an exceptional case.

Or this situation. Here is a young lawyer, twenty-eight years old, engaged to a wonderful woman, with everything to look forward to. He has always been very moderate and careful in his sexual life, and while he was selective about his partners, he always used a condom after sex. He had too much to lose, and he wasn't willing to take any risks, even if they were slim. During the year he was engaged, he completely refrained from sexual intercourse, even though it required a lot of effort on his part. He was getting married soon. But bad luck led him to accept an invitation to a bachelor dinner, where champagne and risqué stories were flowing freely. He left around midnight, and since the night was [183]beautiful, he decided to walk home. He encountered a tempting woman who invited him to join her. Under different circumstances, he would have sent her away or at least stopped by a drugstore to get a condom. But, caught up in the excitement of the wine, the raunchy stories, and a year of abstinence, he went along without a second thought, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. He clearly remembers his feelings and mindset. He wasn’t drunk, just uplifted, but everything felt so normal, so natural, so expected that he couldn't imagine refusing her invitation. He ended up staying for two or three hours without using any protection. As a result—three weeks later, he developed a classic primary syphilitic lesion. How he felt and what it meant for him are things the reader can picture. This is far from an isolated, exceptional case.

From my own practice I could cite a number of cases of venereal infection in which alcohol was the direct, primary factor. How many such cases there are altogether in the period of a year nobody can say, but that they constitute a considerable percentage of the total venereal morbidity every investigating sexologist will testify. Forel claims that 76 per cent. of all venereal infection takes place [184]under the influence of alcohol; Notthaft is more moderate, more discriminating in his statistics and his claims are—30 per cent. An analysis of 1,000 cases of venereal infection, just published by Dr. Hugo Hecht (Venerische Infektion und Alkohol, Z.B.G., Vol. XVI, No. 11) gives over 40 per cent. And the saddest part of it is that among the infected were 75 married men (the author thinks there were more, but only 75 confessed to being married), and of these, 45, equivalent to 60 per cent., were under the influence of alcohol when they contracted their venereal disease (extra-matrimonially, of course).

From my own experience, I could mention several cases of sexually transmitted infections where alcohol was the main factor. No one can say how many such cases occur in a year, but those who study sexual health will agree that they make up a significant percentage of overall sexually transmitted infections. Forel claims that 76 percent of all sexually transmitted infections happen [184]while under the influence of alcohol; Notthaft is more conservative and estimates that number at 30 percent. An analysis of 1,000 cases of sexually transmitted infections recently published by Dr. Hugo Hecht (Venerische Infektion und Alkohol, Z.B.G., Vol. XVI, No. 11) shows over 40 percent. The saddest part is that among those affected were 75 married men (the author believes there were more, but only 75 admitted to being married), and of these, 45, or 60 percent, were under the influence of alcohol when they contracted their sexually transmitted diseases (outside of marriage, of course).

Alcoholic indulgence contributes to the spread of venereal disease directly and indirectly. First and foremost it increases enormously the amount of intercourse indulged in. I certainly do not belong to those who believe that the sex instinct is merely a vicious appetite, like the appetite for alcohol or drugs, which can easily and completely be suppressed by the exertion of will-power. I believe that the sex instinct can be suppressed only within reasonable limits; if an attempt is made to exceed these limits dire results are apt to follow. But I also believe that the sex instinct can be stimulated artificially beyond the natural needs, and among the artificial stimulants of the sex instinct alcohol occupies first place. And bear in mind that alcohol produces [185]even a stronger effect on women, in exciting the sexual passion, than it does on men. Women are more easily upset by stimulants and narcotics, and that is the reason why it is more dangerous for women to drink than it is for men.

Alcohol consumption contributes to the spread of sexually transmitted diseases both directly and indirectly. First and foremost, it significantly increases the amount of sexual activity people engage in. I don't subscribe to the belief that the sex drive is simply a destructive craving, like the craving for alcohol or drugs, which can easily and completely be suppressed through sheer willpower. I believe that the sex drive can only be suppressed to a certain extent; if someone tries to push beyond that limit, severe consequences are likely to follow. However, I also think that the sex drive can be artificially heightened beyond natural needs, and among the artificial stimulants, alcohol is the most prominent. It's important to note that alcohol has an even stronger effect on women, in terms of igniting sexual desire, than it does on men. Women are more susceptible to the effects of stimulants and narcotics, which is why drinking poses greater risks for women than it does for men.

So this, then, is count number one: The man and the woman who in a sober condition would easily abstain, with their libido stimulated and their will-power paralyzed by alcohol, indulge unnecessarily, with the risk of venereal infection to the man and the double risk of venereal infection and pregnancy to the woman. Count two: The man who in the sober condition would use care and discrimination, under the influence of alcohol soon loses all his judgment and sees an angel and a Helen of Troy in the worst and most impudent harlot; with the result that the chances of venereal infection are greatly increased. Count three: Where under ordinary circumstances the man would stay a few minutes to half an hour, under the influence of alcohol he stays several hours, or all night, thus increasing his chances of infection a hundredfold. Count four: Alcohol increases the congestion in the genital organs of both man and woman and renders them much more susceptible to infection. All other factors being equal, a connection which will under strict sobriety remain without bad results, may when one [186]or both partners are under the influence of alcohol be followed by infection. Count five: The man who is in the habit of using venereal prophylactics under the influence of alcohol becomes both careless and reckless; he looks with contempt at preventive measures and the result is—venereal disease.

So this, then, is count number one: The man and the woman who would easily refrain from indulging when sober, but when their libido is heightened and their willpower weakened by alcohol, they engage in excess, risking venereal infection for the man and the additional risk of venereal infection and pregnancy for the woman. Count two: The man who would usually exercise caution and discretion when sober quickly loses all judgment under the influence of alcohol, mistaking the worst and most brazen prostitute for an angel or a Helen of Troy; this significantly increases the chances of venereal infection. Count three: When sober, the man would typically stay for a few minutes to half an hour, but under alcohol's effect, he often stays several hours or all night, thus raising his chances of infection dramatically. Count four: Alcohol heightens congestion in the genital organs for both the man and the woman, making them much more susceptible to infection. With all other factors being equal, a connection that would remain risk-free under strict sobriety may result in infection if one [186] or both partners are intoxicated. Count five: The man who typically uses venereal prophylactics while under the influence of alcohol becomes careless and reckless; he dismisses preventive measures, leading to—venereal disease.

It is impossible to give statistics and exact or even approximate figures. But there is no question in my mind, in the mind of any careful investigator, that if alcoholic beverages could be eliminated, the number of cases of venereal infection would be diminished by about one-half. And what is true of venereal disease is also true of seduction of young girls. Alcohol is the most efficient weapon that either the refined Don Juan or the vulgar pimp has in his possession.

It’s impossible to provide exact statistics or even close estimates. But I have no doubt, and neither do any careful researchers, that if we could eliminate alcoholic drinks, the number of venereal infections would drop by about half. The same goes for the seduction of young girls. Alcohol is the most effective tool that both the sophisticated seducer and the sleazy pimp have at their disposal.

You cannot hope for complete success in eliminating venereal disease and seduction unless you also eliminate alcoholism. For Bacchus is the ally not only of Venus Aphrodite but also of Venus vulgivaga.

You can’t expect to fully succeed in getting rid of sexually transmitted diseases and seduction unless you also tackle alcoholism. Because Bacchus is the supporter of both Venus Aphrodite and Venus vulgivaga.







Chapter Twenty-nineToC

MARRIAGE AND GONORRHEA

Decision of Physician Regarding Marriage of Patients Infected with Gonorrhea or Syphilis—Advisability of Certificate of Freedom from Transmissible Disease—Premarital Examination as a Universal Custom—When a Man Who Had Gonorrhea May Be Allowed to Marry—When a Woman Who Had Gonorrhea May be Allowed to Marry—Antisepsis Before Coitus—Question of Sterility in the Man Who Has Had Gonorrhea Easily Answered—Impossibility of Determining Whether the Woman is Fertile or Not.

Decision of Physician Regarding Marriage of Patients Infected with Gonorrhea or Syphilis—Advisability of Certificate of Freedom from Transmissible Disease—Premarital Examination as a Universal Custom—When a Man Who Had Gonorrhea May Be Allowed to Marry—When a Woman Who Had Gonorrhea May be Allowed to Marry—Antisepsis Before Coitus—Question of Sterility in the Man Who Has Had Gonorrhea Easily Answered—Impossibility of Determining Whether the Woman is Fertile or Not.


For a man or a woman who has once suffered from gonorrhea or syphilis to enter matrimony without having secured a competent physician's opinion is a great responsibility. And a great responsibility rests upon the shoulders of the physician who is called upon to give such an opinion. For, a wrong decision—a wrong decision either way—that is, permission to marry when permission should not have been granted or refusal to give permission when permission should have been granted—may be responsible for much future unhappiness and much disease: disease of the mother and of the offspring. It may even be responsible for death.

For someone who has previously dealt with gonorrhea or syphilis to get married without consulting a qualified doctor is a serious responsibility. The doctor who is asked to provide their opinion also carries a significant burden. A wrong decision—either allowing the marriage when it shouldn't happen or denying permission when it should—can lead to a lot of future unhappiness and diseases affecting both the mother and the children. It could even result in death.

There is no easy, short road to a positive opinion. [188]It requires a thorough, painstaking examination at the hands of an experienced physician, one thoroughly familiar with all the modern tests, to tell whether it is safe for a man who once suffered from venereal disease to enter the bonds of matrimony. Sometimes one examination is not sufficient, and several examinations may be necessary; but, the opinion of a conscientious, experienced physician may be relied upon, and, if all men and women who once suffered from venereal disease would seek for, and be guided by, such an opinion, there would be no cases of marital infection, there would be no children afflicted with gonorrheal ophthalmia, there would be no cases of hereditary syphilis.

There’s no quick or easy way to get a positive opinion. [188] It takes a detailed and careful assessment from an experienced doctor, someone who knows all the latest tests, to determine if it’s safe for someone who has previously had a sexually transmitted infection to get married. Sometimes one examination isn’t enough, and multiple evaluations may be needed; however, you can trust the judgment of a knowledgeable and ethical physician. If all men and women who have had sexually transmitted infections sought and followed such advice, there would be no cases of marital infections, no children suffering from gonococcal conjunctivitis, and no instances of hereditary syphilis.

I firmly believe that a time will come when all venereal disease will have disappeared from the face of the earth. But, until that time comes, it would be for the benefit of the race and of posterity if people had to present a certificate of freedom from transmissible venereal disease as a prerequisite to a marriage license. Custom is often more efficient than law, and, if a premarital examination should become a universal custom (and there are indications in this direction), no law would be needed.

I really believe that there will be a time when all sexually transmitted diseases will be completely gone. But until that happens, it would be better for everyone and for future generations if people had to show a certificate proving they are free from transmissible sexually transmitted diseases before getting a marriage license. Customs often work better than laws, and if getting a premarital exam becomes a common practice (which seems to be happening), then we wouldn't need any laws.

When May a Man Who Had Gonorrhea Get Married? For a man who once suffered from gonorrhea [189]to be pronounced cured and a safe candidate for marriage, the following conditions must be present:

When Can a Man Who Had Gonorrhea Get Married? For a man who has previously had gonorrhea [189]to be considered cured and a suitable candidate for marriage, the following conditions must be met:

1. There must be no discharge.

1. There must not be any discharge.

2. The urine must be perfectly clear and free from shreds.

2. The urine must be completely clear and free of any particles.

3. The secretion from the prostate gland, as obtained by prostatic massage, and from the seminal vesicles, as obtained by "milking," or "stripping," the vesicles, must be free from pus and gonococci. To make sure, it is best to repeat such examination at three different times.

3. The fluid from the prostate gland, obtained through prostatic massage, and from the seminal vesicles, acquired by "milking" or "stripping" the vesicles, should be free of pus and gonococci. To ensure accuracy, it's advisable to repeat this examination at three separate times.

4. There must be neither stricture nor patches in the urethra.

4. There shouldn't be any blockages or sores in the urethra.

5. What we call the complement-fixation test, which is a blood test for gonorrhea similar to the Wassermann blood-test for syphilis, must be negative.

5. The complement-fixation test, which is a blood test for gonorrhea similar to the Wassermann test for syphilis, must come back negative.

Referring to conditions 1 and 2, it sometimes happens that the patient has a minute amount of discharge or a few shreds in the urine, and I still permit him to marry; but this is done only after the discharge and shreds have been repeatedly examined and have been found to be catarrhal in character and absolutely free from any gonococci or other germs.

Referring to conditions 1 and 2, it sometimes happens that the patient has a tiny amount of discharge or a few shreds in the urine, and I still allow him to marry; but this is only after the discharge and shreds have been thoroughly examined multiple times and confirmed to be catarrhal in nature and completely free from any gonococci or other germs.

It sometimes happens that a patient comes to me for an examination a few days before the date set [190]for the wedding. I examine him and find that he is not in a safe condition to marry, and so advise him to delay the wedding. Sometimes he follows the advice, but in some cases he is unable to do so. He claims the wedding has been arranged, the invitation-cards have been sent out, and to delay the wedding would lead to endless trouble and perhaps scandal. In such cases I, of course, assume no responsibility; however, I do advise the man to use an antiseptic suppository or some other method that will protect the bride from infection for the time being, while he, the husband, has an opportunity to take treatment until cured. Of the many cases in which I advised this method, I do not know of one in which infection has taken place.

It sometimes happens that a patient comes to me for an examination a few days before the scheduled wedding date [190]. I examine him and find that he is not in a safe condition to marry, so I advise him to postpone the wedding. Sometimes he takes the advice, but in other cases, he can’t do that. He argues that the wedding has been planned, the invitations have been sent out, and delaying the wedding would cause endless trouble and possibly scandal. In those situations, I, of course, take no responsibility; however, I do advise him to use an antiseptic suppository or some other method to protect the bride from infection for now, while he has the chance to get treatment until he is cured. Of all the cases where I advised this method, I don’t know of a single one where infection occurred.

When May a Woman Who Once Had Gonorrhea Be Permitted to Marry? In the case of a woman, the decision may be harder to reach than in that of a man. Of course, the urine must be clear and the urethra must be normal; however, we cannot insist that there must be no discharge. This, because practically every woman has some slight discharge; even, if not all the time, then at least immediately prior and subsequent to menstruation. Of course, the discharge must be free from gonococci and pus. Also the complement-fixation tests must be negative. But, even so, we cannot be absolutely sure, because [191]gonococci may be hidden in the uterus or in the Fallopian tubes.

When Can a Woman Who Previously Had Gonorrhea Get Married? In the case of a woman, making this decision might be more complicated than it is for a man. Certainly, the urine should be clear and the urethra should be normal; however, we can't require that there be no discharge at all. This is because almost every woman experiences some minor discharge; even if it's not constant, it often occurs right before and after menstruation. Of course, the discharge must be free of gonococci and pus. Additionally, the complement-fixation tests need to be negative. Still, we can never be completely certain, because [191]gonococci can be concealed in the uterus or the Fallopian tubes.

Here, we have to go a good deal by the history given us. If the woman, during the course of the gonorrhea, had salpingitis, that is, an inflammation of the Fallopian tubes, then we can never say positively that she is cured; all we can say, at best, is: presumably cured. And, further, if she has no pains in the uterine appendages, either spontaneous or on examination, and, if several examinations made within a day or two following menstruation are negative, then we may assume that she is cured. It is important, though, that this examination be made on the last day of menstruation or on the first or second day following; for there are many cases in which no pus and no gonococci will show in the inter-menstrual period, but will appear on those particular days, because, if the gonococci are hidden high up, they are likely to come down with the menstrual blood and portions of mucous membrane that are shed during menstruation.

Here, we have to rely a lot on the history provided to us. If the woman had salpingitis, which is inflammation of the Fallopian tubes, during the course of the gonorrhea, then we can't definitively say that she is cured; at best, we can only say she is presumably cured. Additionally, if she has no pain in the uterine appendages, either spontaneously or upon examination, and if several examinations conducted within a day or two after menstruation are negative, then we can assume that she is cured. However, it is crucial that this examination occurs on the last day of menstruation or on the first or second day afterward; many cases do not show pus or gonococci during the inter-menstrual period, but they may appear on those specific days because if the gonococci are hidden high up, they are likely to come down with the menstrual blood and pieces of mucous membrane that are shed during menstruation.

At best, it is a delicate problem, so that whenever there has been the least suspicion that the woman may harbor gonococci I have always advised (as is my custom, to be on the safe side) and directed the woman to use either an antiseptic suppository or an antiseptic douche before coitus. With these [192]precautions adopted, I have never had an accident happen.

At best, it’s a tricky situation, so whenever there’s been even the slightest suspicion that the woman might have gonococci, I’ve always recommended (as I usually do, to be safe) that she use either an antiseptic suppository or an antiseptic douche before having sex. With these [192]precautions in place, I’ve never had any accidents occur.

The Question of Probable Sterility. Thus far I have considered the problem of marriage from the standpoint of infectivity. But, we know that, besides the effect on the individual, gonorrhea has also a far-reaching influence on the race; in other words, that it is prone to make the subjects—both men and women—sterile. And a candidate for marriage may, and often does, want to know whether, besides being noninfective, he or she is capable of begetting or having children.

The Question of Possible Sterility. So far, I have looked at the issue of marriage from the perspective of infections. However, we know that, aside from its impact on individuals, gonorrhea also significantly affects the population; in other words, it can often cause both men and women to become sterile. As a result, someone considering marriage may, and often does, want to find out if, in addition to not being infectious, they are able to conceive or have children.

In the case of man, the problem is, fortunately, a very simple one. We can easily obtain a specimen of the man's semen and determine, by means of the microscope, whether it contains spermatozoa or not. If it does contain a normal number of lively, rapidly moving spermatozoa, the man is fertile, regardless of whether he ever had epididymitis or not. If the semen contains no spermatozoa, or only a few deformed or lazily moving ones, then he is sterile.

In the case of men, the issue is, fortunately, quite simple. We can easily collect a sample of a man's semen and check under a microscope to see if it contains sperm. If it has a normal count of healthy, actively moving sperm, the man is fertile, regardless of whether he’s ever had epididymitis. If the semen has no sperm or only a few deformed or sluggish ones, then he is sterile.

In the case of woman, it is absolutely impossible to determine whether the gonorrhea has made her sterile or not; because there is no way of expressing an ovum from the ovary. The woman may not have had any pain or inflammation in the Fallopian tubes, [193]and yet there may have been sufficient inflammation to close up the orifices of the tubes. On the other hand, she may have had a severe salpingitis on both sides and still be fertile. Nor is there any way of telling whether the ovaries were so involved in the process as to become incapable of generating healthy ova, or any ova at all. In short, there is absolutely no way of telling whether a woman is sterile or fertile—we can only surmise. And our surmise in this respect is liable to be wrong just as often as right. The only way the question can be decided is by experience. If the prospective husband is willing to take a chance, well and good.

In the case of women, it is impossible to determine whether gonorrhea has made her sterile or not; because there is no way to extract an egg from the ovary. A woman may not have experienced any pain or inflammation in the fallopian tubes, [193] and yet there might have been enough inflammation to block the openings of the tubes. On the flip side, she could have had a severe infection in both tubes and still be able to conceive. There’s also no way to know if the ovaries were affected enough to be unable to produce healthy eggs, or any eggs at all. In short, there's absolutely no way to tell whether a woman is sterile or fertile—we can only guess. And our guesses in this case are likely to be wrong as often as they are right. The only way to resolve the issue is through experience. If the potential husband is willing to take a risk, then that’s fine.

While just as many girls marry as do young men, still, in practice, we always shall have to examine an incomparably larger number of male than of female candidates. This is due, not only to the fact that an incomparably larger number of men suffer from venereal disease, but also because very few women will confess to their fiancés that they ever entertained antematrimonial relations and—what is still worse—were infected with venereal disease. This, of course, is owing to our double standard of morality, which looks upon as a trivial or no offense in the man what it condemns as a heinous crime in the woman. I have known hundreds of men who confessed freely to their fiancées that they had had [194]gonorrhea, but I have known only two girls who made a confession of the fact to their future husbands. They got married, however, and lived happily with their husbands ever after.

While just as many girls get married as guys, we still have to look at far more male candidates than female ones. This is not only because many more men have sexually transmitted diseases, but also because very few women admit to their fiancés that they ever had premarital relationships and—what’s even worse—were infected with an STD. This, of course, is because of our double standard of morality, which treats a man’s actions as minor or excusable while condemning the same behavior in a woman as terrible. I’ve known hundreds of men who openly confessed to their fiancées that they had [194]gonorrhea, but I’ve only known two girls who admitted this to their future husbands. They did get married, though, and lived happily with their husbands ever after.







Chapter ThirtyToC

MARRIAGE AND SYPHILIS

Rules for Permitting a Syphilitic Patient to Marry—Rules More Severe in Cases Where Children Are Desired—Where Both Partners Are Syphilitic—Danger of Paresis in Some Syphilitic Patients—A Case in the Author's Practice.

Rules for Allowing a Syphilitic Patient to Marry—Stricter Rules When Children Are Desired—When Both Partners Have Syphilis—Risk of Paresis in Some Syphilitic Patients—A Case from the Author's Practice.


The problem of the syphilitic differs from the problem of the exgonorrheal patient. When a gonorrheal patient is cured, so far as infectivity is concerned, and is not sterile, there is no apprehension as to the offspring. Gonorrhea is not hereditary, and the child of a gonorrheal patient does not differ from the child of a nongonorrheal person. In the case of syphilis, it is different. The patient may be safe so far as infecting the partner is concerned, but yet there may be danger for the offspring.

The issue with someone who has syphilis is different from that of someone who has been treated for gonorrhea. When a person with gonorrhea is cured and is no longer infectious, even if they aren't sterile, there are no concerns about their children. Gonorrhea isn’t hereditary, so the child of a gonorrheal patient is just like the child of someone without the infection. However, with syphilis, it’s a different story. A patient might not be contagious to their partner, but there’s still a risk for their children.

The rules for permitting a man or a woman who once had syphilis to marry, therefore, are different from those applied to the gonorrheal patient. Here are the rules:

The rules for allowing a man or a woman who once had syphilis to get married are different from those that apply to someone with gonorrhea. Here are the rules:

1. I would make it an invariable rule that no syphilitic patient should marry or should be permitted to marry before five years have elapsed from the [196]day of infection. But the period of time alone is not sufficient; other conditions must be met before we may give a syphilitic patient permission to marry.

1. I would establish a strict rule that no person with syphilis should marry or be allowed to marry until at least five years have passed since the [196]day of their infection. However, just the time factor isn’t enough; additional criteria must be fulfilled before we can allow a syphilitic patient to marry.

2. The man or the woman must have received thorough systematic treatment for at least three years, either constantly or off and on, according to the physician's judgment.

2. The man or woman must have undergone comprehensive treatment for at least three years, either continuously or intermittently, based on the doctor's assessment.

3. For at least one year before the intended marriage, the person must have been absolutely free from any manifestations of syphilis; that is, from any eruptions on the skin, from any mucous patches, swelling in the bones, ulcerations, and so on.

3. For at least one year before the planned marriage, the person must have been completely free from any signs of syphilis; that is, from any skin rashes, mucous lesions, bone swelling, ulcers, and so forth.

4. Four Wassermann tests, taken at intervals of three months and at a time when the patient was receiving no specific treatment, must be absolutely negative.

4. Four Wassermann tests, taken at three-month intervals and at a time when the patient was not receiving any specific treatment, must be completely negative.

If these four conditions are fully met, then the patient may be permitted to marry.

If these four conditions are fully met, then the patient may be allowed to marry.

It is important, however, to state that, in permitting or refusing syphilitic persons to marry, we are guided to a great extent by the fact as to whether they expect to have children soon or not.

It is important, however, to state that, in allowing or denying syphilitic individuals the right to marry, we are largely influenced by whether they expect to have children soon or not.

In the case of a couple who are anxious to have children soon after their marriage, the conditions for our permission must be more severe than when the couple are willing or anxious to use contraceptive measures for the first years of their married [197]life. For, if a man is free from any skin lesions and from any mucous patches, his wife is safe from infection as long as she does not become pregnant. But, if she does get pregnant, she may become infected through the fetus; and, of course, the child also is liable to be syphilitic. Hence, much stricter requirements for syphilitics who expect to become parents are necessary than for those who do not.

In the case of a couple eager to have children soon after their marriage, the conditions for our approval must be stricter than for couples who are willing to use contraceptive methods during the first years of their married [197]life. If a man has no skin lesions or mucous patches, his wife is safe from infection as long as she doesn’t become pregnant. However, if she does get pregnant, she could become infected through the fetus; and, of course, the baby could also be syphilitic. Therefore, much stricter requirements for syphilitics who plan to become parents are necessary compared to those who do not.

In case both the man and the woman are or have been syphilitic, permission to marry may be granted without hesitation, as the danger of infection is absent, but permission to have children must be refused absolutely and unequivocally. Regardless of the time that may have elapsed from the period of infection, regardless of treatment, regardless of Wassermann tests, the danger to the child is too great if both parents have the syphilitic taint in them. A healthy child may be born from two syphilitic parents who have undergone energetic treatment, but we have no right to take the chance. I, at least, never wanted to, nor ever will want to, take such a responsibility.

If both the man and the woman have syphilis or have had it in the past, they can be allowed to marry without any hesitation since the risk of infection is gone. However, they must be absolutely and unequivocally denied permission to have children. No matter how long it’s been since the infection, no matter the treatment or negative Wassermann tests, the risk to the child is just too high if both parents carry the syphilitic infection. It’s possible for two syphilitic parents who have had effective treatment to have a healthy child, but we can't take that risk. I, for one, never wanted to, and I never will want to, shoulder such a responsibility.

The Danger of Locomotor Ataxia or Paresis. There is still one more point to consider in dealing with a syphilitic patient. In patients who did not receive energetic treatment from the very beginning of the disease as also in patients whose treatment [198]was only desultory and irregular, we never can guarantee, in spite of lack of external symptoms, in spite of a negative Wassermann reaction, that some trouble may not develop later in life.

The Danger of Locomotor Ataxia or Paresis. There’s one more thing to think about when treating a syphilis patient. In patients who didn't receive aggressive treatment right from the start of the disease, as well as in those whose treatment [198]was inconsistent and irregular, we can never guarantee that, despite the absence of visible symptoms and a negative Wassermann reaction, some issues might not arise later in life.

What shall we do in such cases and what particularly shall we do if, from a general examination of the patient, we carry away the impression that, while free from the danger of infection, the man is not a good risk? Under these circumstances, we must refuse all personal responsibility, leaving the assumption of the responsibility to the prospective wife.

What should we do in these situations, especially if our overall assessment of the patient makes us feel that, while he’s not at risk of infection, he’s still not a suitable candidate? In such cases, we need to decline any personal responsibility and let the prospective wife take on that responsibility.

Here is a case in point. About five years ago a man came to me for examination; he came with his fiancée. He had contracted syphilis ten years previously, received irregular treatment by mouth, off and on. For five years, he had had no symptoms of any kind. He considered himself cured, but wanted to know, and his fiancée wanted to know, whether he really was cured. There were no symptoms of any kind and the Wassermann test was negative. Nevertheless, I could not give him a clean bill of health. I noticed what seemed to me a slowness in thinking and just the least bit of hesitation in his speech.

Here's a relevant example. About five years ago, a man came to me for an examination, accompanied by his fiancée. He had contracted syphilis ten years earlier and had received irregular oral treatment on and off. For five years, he hadn’t experienced any symptoms. He thought he was cured, but both he and his fiancée wanted to know if that was really the case. There were no symptoms at all, and the Wassermann test was negative. However, I couldn’t give him a clean bill of health. I noticed what seemed like a slight slowness in his thinking and a bit of hesitation in his speech.

I told the girl (the man was thirty-five, she was thirty-two) that I could not render a definite decision in the matter, that everything might be all right, [199]and then again it might not; but, that the question about children she would have to decide definitely, once for all, namely, that she was not to have any children. She was fully satisfied so far as that part was concerned; she said she herself objected to children and did not intend to have any and knew how to take care of herself. All she wanted to know was, whether she was in danger of being infected. I told her no, but that in my opinion there was some danger of her husband developing general paresis or locomotor ataxia.

I told the woman (the man was thirty-five, she was thirty-two) that I couldn’t make a definite decision on the matter, that everything could be fine, [199] but then again it might not be; however, the question of whether she wanted children was something she needed to decide for good, meaning that she should not have any kids. She was completely fine with that part; she said she herself didn’t want children and wasn’t planning on having any and knew how to take care of herself. All she wanted to know was if she was at risk of getting infected. I told her no, but that in my opinion, there was a risk of her husband developing general paresis or locomotor ataxia.

The girl had been a teacher for about twelve years, and she was so sick at heart of the work, was so anxious for a home of her own, that she decided to take the risk. And they got married. The marriage remained childless. The man developed general paresis (softening of the brain) three years later and died about a year afterward. The woman, now a widow, I understand, is not sorry for the step she had taken. This shows what things our social-economic conditions and our moral code are responsible for.

The girl had been a teacher for about twelve years, and she was so tired of the job, so eager for her own home, that she decided to take the plunge. So they got married. The marriage didn’t produce any kids. The man developed general paresis (softening of the brain) three years later and passed away about a year after that. The woman, now a widow, I hear, doesn’t regret the decision she made. This illustrates the impact our social and economic conditions, along with our moral standards, have on people.







Chapter Thirty-oneToC

WHO MAY AND WHO MAY NOT MARRY

The Physician Often Consulted as to Advisability of Marriage—Venereal Disease the Most Common Question—Tuberculosis—Sexual Appetite of Tubercular Patients—Effect of Pregnancy Contraceptive Knowledge for Tubercular Wife—Heart Disease—Serious Bar to Marriage—Influence of Sexual Intercourse—Cancer—Fear of Hereditary Transmission—Exophthalmic Goiter—Most Frequent in Women—Simple Goiter—Exceptions to Rule—Obesity—Family History—Obesity and Stoutness Not Synonymous—Arteriosclerosis—Danger in Sexual Act—Gout—Real Causes of Gout—Mumps—Parotid Glands and Sex Organs—Mumps and Sterility—Oöphoritis Due to Mumps—Hemophilia—Hemophilic Sons May Marry—Hemophilic Daughters May Not Marry—AnemiaChlorosisEpilepsy—Hysteria—Symptoms of Hysteria—Marriage of Hysterical Women—Alcoholism—Effect on Offspring—Alcoholics and Impotence—Feeblemindedness—Evil Effects on Offspring—Sterilization of Feebleminded Only Preventive—Insanity—Functional Insanity—Organic Insanity—Hereditary Transmissibility of Insanity—Fear Resulting in Insanity—Environment versus Heredity in Insanity—NeurosisNeurastheniaPsychastheniaNeuropathyPsychopathy—Nervous Conditions and Genius—Sexual Impotence and Genius—Drug Addiction—External Causes—Consanguineous Marriages—When Consanguineous Marriages are Advisable—Offspring of Consanguineous Marriages—Homosexuality—Homosexuals Often Ignorant of Their Condition—Sexual Repression and Homosexuality—Sadism and Divorce—Masochism—Sexual Impotence and Marriage—Effect Upon the Wife—Frigidity—Marital Relations and Frigid Woman—Excessive Libido and Marriage—Excessive Demands Upon Wife—Satyriasis—The Excessively Libidinous Wife—Nymphomania—Treatment—Harelip—Myopia—Astigmatism—Premature Baldness—Criminality—Crime [201]as Result of Environment—Legal and Moral Crime—Ancestral Criminality and Marriage—Rules of Heredity—Pauperism—Difference Between Pauperism and Poverty.

The Doctor Often Consulted About the Suitability of Marriage—Sexually Transmitted Infections the Most Common Concern—Tuberculosis—Sexual Desire of Tuberculosis Patients—Impact of Pregnancy and Contraceptive Awareness for Tubercular Wives—Heart Disease—Serious Barrier to Marriage—Impact of Sexual Activity—Cancer—Concerns About Genetic Transmission—Exophthalmic Goiter—Most Common in Women—Simple Goiter—Exceptions to This Rule—Obesity—Family History—Obesity and Being Overweight Are Not the Same—Arteriosclerosis—Risks in Sexual Activity—Gout—Actual Causes of Gout—Mumps—Parotid Glands and Reproductive Organs—Mumps and Infertility—Oophoritis Caused by Mumps—Hemophilia—Hemophilic Sons Can Marry—Hemophilic Daughters Cannot Marry—AnemiaChlorosisEpilepsy—Hysteria—Symptoms of Hysteria—Marriage of Hysterical Women—Alcoholism—Impact on Children—Alcoholics and Impotence—Intellectual Disability—Negative Impacts on Offspring—Sterilization of the Intellectually Disabled is the Only Preventive Measure—Insanity—Functional Insanity—Organic Insanity—Inheritance of Insanity—Fears Leading to Insanity—Environment vs. Genetics in Insanity—NeurosisNeurastheniaPsychastheniaNeuropathyPsychopathy—Nervous Conditions and Genius—Sexual Impotence and Genius—Drug Addiction—External Causes—Consanguineous Marriages—When Consanguineous Marriages Are Advisable—Children of Consanguineous Marriages—Homosexuality—Homosexuals Are Often Unaware of Their Condition—Sexual Repression and Homosexuality—Sadism and Divorce—Masochism—Sexual Impotence and Marriage—Impact on the Wife—Frigidity—Marital Relations and Frigid Women—Excessive Libido and Marriage—Excessive Demands on the Wife—Satyriasis—The Excessively Sexual Wife—Nymphomania—Treatment—Cleft Lip—Nearsightedness—Astigmatism—Early Baldness—Criminal Behavior—Crime [201] as an Outcome of Environment—Legal and Moral Crime—Ancestral Criminality and Marriage—Rules of Heredity—Pauperism—Difference Between Pauperism and Poverty.


In former years, nobody thought of asking a physician for permission to get married. He was not consulted in the matter at all. The parents would investigate the young man's social standing, his ability to make a living, his habits perhaps, whether he was a drinking man or not, but to ask the physician's expert advice—why, as said, nobody thought of it. And how much sorrow and unhappiness, how many tragedies the doctor could have averted, if he had been asked in time! Fortunately, in the last few years, a great change has taken place in this respect. It is now a very common occurrence for the intelligent layman and laywoman, imbued with a sense of responsibility for the welfare of their presumptive future offspring and actuated, perhaps, also by some fear of infection, to consult a physician as to the advisability of the marriage, leaving it to him to make the decision and they abiding by that decision.

In past years, no one thought about asking a doctor for permission to get married. He wasn’t consulted at all. Parents would look into the young man’s social status, his ability to earn a living, and maybe his habits, like whether he drank or not, but asking for the doctor’s expert advice—well, that was never considered. And just think of how much pain and unhappiness, how many tragedies the doctor could have prevented if he had been asked in time! Luckily, in recent years, a big change has occurred in this regard. It’s now quite common for thoughtful men and women, mindful of the future wellbeing of their potential children and perhaps also concerned about health issues, to consult a doctor about the suitability of the marriage, leaving the decision to him and agreeing to follow that decision.

As a matter of fact, as often is the case, the pendulum now is in danger of swinging to the other extreme; for, a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, and the tendency of the layman is to exaggerate matters and to take things in an absolute instead [202]of in a relative manner. As a result, many laymen and laywomen nowadays insist upon a thorough examination of their own person and the person of their future partner, when there is nothing the matter with either. Still, this is a minor evil, and it is better to be too careful than not careful enough.

Actually, as is often the case, the pendulum is now at risk of swinging to the other extreme; because a little knowledge can be a dangerous thing, and non-experts tend to exaggerate issues and see things in black-and-white instead of relative terms. As a result, many everyday people today insist on thorough evaluations of themselves and their future partners, even when there’s nothing wrong with either. Still, this is a minor issue, and it’s better to be overly cautious than not cautious enough.

I am frequently consulted as to the advisability or nonadvisability of a certain marriage taking place. I, therefore, thought it desirable to discuss in a separate chapter the various factors, physical and mental, personal and ancestral, likely to exert an influence upon the marital partner and on the expected offspring, and to state as briefly as possible and so far as our present state of knowledge permits which factors may be considered eugenic, or favorable to the offspring, and dysgenic, or unfavorable to the offspring.

I often get asked about whether a particular marriage is a good idea or not. Because of this, I thought it would be useful to talk in a separate chapter about the different factors—physical, mental, personal, and hereditary—that could impact the marriage partner and their future children. I'll summarize, as clearly as I can based on what we currently know, which factors might be considered beneficial for the children (eugenic) and which might be seen as harmful (dysgenic).

The questions concerning the advisability of marriage which the layman as well as the physician have most often to deal with are questions concerning venereal disease. On account of the importance of the subject, these have been discussed rather in detail under the headings "Gonorrhea and Marriage" and "Syphilis and Marriage." Other factors affecting marriage, either in the eugenic or dysgenic sense, will be discussed more briefly in the [203]present chapter, and more or less in the order of their importance.

The questions about whether marriage is a good idea that both everyday people and doctors often encounter mainly involve concerns about sexually transmitted diseases. Because this topic is so important, we've covered it in detail under the sections "Gonorrhea and Marriage" and "Syphilis and Marriage." Other factors influencing marriage, whether in a positive or negative way, will be addressed more briefly in the [203]current chapter, generally following their significance.


Tuberculosis

Tuberculosis, which carries off such a large part of humanity every year, is caused by the well-known bacillus tuberculosis, discovered by Koch. The germ is generally inhaled through the respiratory tract, and most frequently settles in the lungs, giving rise to what is known as pulmonary consumption. However, many other organs and tissues may be affected by tuberculosis.

Tuberculosis, which takes such a large toll on humanity every year, is caused by the well-known bacterium Mycobacterium tuberculosis, discovered by Koch. The germ is usually inhaled through the respiratory system and most often infects the lungs, leading to what's known as pulmonary consumption. However, many other organs and tissues can also be affected by tuberculosis.

Tuberculosis used to be considered the hereditary disease par excellence. Entire families were carried off by it, and, seeing a tuberculous father or mother and then tuberculous children, it was assumed that the infection had been transmitted to the children by heredity. As a matter of fact, the disease was spread by infection. In former years, little care was exercised about destroying the sputum; the patients would spit indiscriminately on the floor, and the sputum, drying up, would be mixed with the dust and inhaled. Often the children crawling on the floor would introduce the infective material directly, by putting their little fingers in their mouths.

Tuberculosis used to be seen as the ultimate hereditary disease. Entire families would be affected, and when a father or mother had tuberculosis and then their children did too, it was assumed the infection was passed down genetically. In reality, the disease spread through infection. In the past, not much attention was given to disposing of sputum properly; patients would spit anywhere, and the sputum would dry and mix with the dust, which people would then inhale. Often, babies crawling on the floor would directly introduce the infectious material by putting their small fingers in their mouths.

It is now known that tuberculosis is not a hereditary disease, that is, that the germs are not [204]transmitted by heredity. The weak constitution, however, which favors the development of tuberculosis, is inherited. And children of tuberculous parents, therefore, must not only be guarded against infection, but must be brought up with special care, so as to strengthen their resistance and overcome the weakened constitution which they inherited.

It is now understood that tuberculosis is not an inherited disease; the germs are not [204] passed down through genetics. However, the weakened constitution that makes someone more prone to tuberculosis can be inherited. Therefore, children of parents with tuberculosis must not only be protected from infection but also raised with extra care to strengthen their resilience and address the weakened constitution they inherited.

That a person with an active tuberculous lesion should not get married goes without saying. But, it is a good rule to follow for a tuberculous person not to marry for two or three years, until all tuberculous lesions have been declared healed by a competent physician. As a rule, a tuberculous patient is a poor provider, and that also counts in the advice against marriage. Then sexual intercourse has, as a rule, a strong influence on the development of the disease. Unfortunately the sexual appetite of tuberculous patients is not diminished, but, rather, very frequently heightened; and frequent sexual relations weaken them and hasten the progress of the disease.

It goes without saying that a person with an active tuberculosis infection shouldn't get married. However, it's generally a good idea for someone with tuberculosis to wait for two or three years before marrying, until all tuberculosis lesions have been confirmed as healed by a qualified doctor. Typically, a tuberculosis patient isn't a great provider, which is another reason for the advice against marriage. Additionally, sexual intercourse usually has a significant impact on the progression of the disease. Unfortunately, the sexual drive of tuberculosis patients isn't reduced; in fact, it often increases, and frequent sexual activity can weaken them and accelerate the progression of the disease.

As to pregnancy, that has an extremely pernicious effect on the course of tuberculosis, and no tuberculous woman should ever marry. If such a one does marry or if the disease develops after her getting married, means should be given her to prevent her from having children. During the pregnancy, [205]the disease may not seem to be making any progress—occasionally the patient may even seem to improve—but after childbirth the disease makes very rapid strides and the patient may quickly succumb. In the early days of my practice I saw a number of such cases. If precautions are taken against pregnancy, then permission to indulge in sexual relations may be given, provided it is done rarely and moderately.

Regarding pregnancy, it has a very harmful effect on the course of tuberculosis, and no woman with tuberculosis should ever get married. If she does marry, or if the disease develops after marriage, she should be given means to prevent having children. During pregnancy, [205] the disease might not seem to progress—sometimes the patient may even appear to improve—but after childbirth, the disease can worsen rapidly, and the patient may quickly fail. In the early days of my practice, I saw several such cases. If measures are taken to avoid pregnancy, then permission for sexual relations may be granted, as long as it is done infrequently and moderately.

If a patient who has tuberculosis conceals the fact from the future partner, a fraud is committed, and the marriage is morally annullable. It has been declared legally annullable by a recent decision of a New York judge.

If a patient with tuberculosis hides this information from their future partner, it's considered fraudulent, and the marriage can be morally annulled. A recent ruling by a New York judge has also declared it legally annulable.


Heart Disease

Heart disease also is no longer considered hereditary. Nevertheless, heart disease, if at all serious, is a contraindication to marriage. First, because the patient's life may be cut off at any time. Second, sexual intercourse is injurious for people having heart disease; it may aggravate the disease or even cause sudden death. It is more injurious even than it is in tuberculosis. Third—and this concerns the woman only—pregnancy has a very detrimental effect upon a diseased heart. A heart that, with [206]proper care, might be able to do its work for years, often is suddenly snapped by the extra work put upon it by pregnancy and childbirth. Sometimes a woman with a diseased heart will keep up to the last minute of the delivery of the child and then suddenly will gasp and expire. In the first year of my practice I saw such a case, and I never have wanted to see another. Women suffering from heart disease of any serious character should not, under any circumstance, be permitted to become pregnant.

Heart disease is no longer seen as hereditary. However, if it's serious, it is a reason to avoid marriage. First, because the patient's life could end at any time. Second, sexual activity is harmful for people with heart disease; it can worsen the condition or even lead to sudden death. It's even more harmful than it is for those with tuberculosis. Third—and this specifically affects women—pregnancy severely impacts a diseased heart. A heart that might function well for years with proper care can suddenly fail due to the extra strain of pregnancy and childbirth. Sometimes a woman with a heart condition can manage until the very end of labor and then suddenly gasp and die. In my first year of practice, I witnessed such a case, and I've never wanted to see another. Women with serious heart disease should not be allowed to become pregnant under any circumstances.


Cancer

No man will knowingly marry a woman, and no woman will marry a man, afflicted with cancer. However, this question often comes up in cases where the matrimonial candidates are free from cancer, but where there has been cancer in the family.

No man will knowingly marry a woman, and no woman will marry a man, afflicted with cancer. However, this question often arises in situations where the potential spouses are cancer-free, but there is a history of cancer in the family.

Cancer is not a hereditary disease, contrary to the opinions that have prevailed, and, if the matrimonial candidate otherwise is healthy, no hesitation need be felt on the score of heredity. The fear of hereditary transmission of the disease has caused a great deal of mischief and unnecessary anxiety to people. Scientifically conducted investigations and carefully prepared statistics have shown that many diseases formerly considered hereditary are not hereditary in the least degree.

Cancer is not an inherited disease, despite popular beliefs, and if a potential spouse is otherwise healthy, there should be no concerns about heredity. The fear of passing on the disease has caused a lot of harm and unnecessary worry for people. Scientific research and well-prepared statistics have demonstrated that many diseases once thought to be hereditary are not inherited at all.

[207]Should it, however, be shown that in one family there were many members who died of cancer, it would indicate that there is some disease or dyscrasia in that family, and the contracting of a marriage with any member of that family would be inadvisable.

[207]However, if it turns out that many members of one family died from cancer, it would suggest there is some illness or abnormality in that family, and marrying anyone from that family would not be wise.


Exophthalmic Goiter (Basedow's Disease)

Exophthalmic goiter is a disease characterised by enlargement of the thyroid gland, protrusion of the eyeballs, and rapid beating of the heart. The disease is confined almost entirely, though not exclusively, to women, and I should not advise any exophthalmic woman to marry; neither should I advise a man to marry an exophthalmic goiter woman. It is a very annoying disease, while sexual intercourse aggravates all the symptoms, particularly the palpitation of the heart. The children, if not affected by exophthalmic goiter, are liable to be very neurotic.

Exophthalmos is a condition characterized by an enlarged thyroid gland, bulging eyes, and a rapid heartbeat. This condition mostly affects women, and I wouldn’t recommend that any woman with exophthalmos get married; nor would I advise a man to marry a woman with this condition. It’s a very troublesome issue, and sexual activity can worsen all the symptoms, especially the heart palpitations. Children, if they don’t inherit exophthalmos, are likely to be quite neurotic.

Simple goiter, that is, enlargement of the thyroid gland (chiefly occurring in certain high mountainous localities, such as Switzerland), is not so strongly dysgenic as is exophthalmic goiter. Still, goiter patients are not good matrimonial risks.

Simple goiter, which is the enlargement of the thyroid gland (mainly found in certain high-altitude areas like Switzerland), is not as strongly linked to genetic issues as exophthalmic goiter. However, people with goiter are not considered good marriage prospects.

Of course, there are always exceptions. I know an exophthalmic goiter woman who brought up four children, and very good, healthy children they are. [208]But in writing we can only speak of the average and not of exceptions.

Of course, there are always exceptions. I know a woman with exophthalmic goiter who raised four children, and they are very good, healthy kids. [208] But in writing, we can only talk about the average and not about exceptions.


Obesity

Obesity, or excessive stoutness, is an undue development of fat throughout the body. That it is hereditary, that it runs in families, there is no question whatsoever. And, while with great care as to the diet and by proper exercise, obesity may, as a rule, be avoided in those predisposed, it none the less often will develop in spite of all measures taken against it. Some very obese people eat only one-half or less of what many thin people do; but in the former, everything seems to run to fat.

Obesity, or extreme overweight, is an excessive buildup of fat throughout the body. There's no doubt that it can be hereditary and that it tends to run in families. Although, with careful attention to diet and proper exercise, those who are predisposed can usually avoid obesity, it can still develop despite all efforts to prevent it. Some very obese people eat only half or even less than what many thin people consume, yet in their cases, everything seems to turn into fat.

Obesity must be considered a dysgenic factor. The obese are subject to heart disease, asthma, apoplexy, gallstones, gout, diabetes, constipation; they withstand pneumonia and acute infectious diseases poorly, and they are bad risks when they have to undergo major surgical operations. They also, as a rule, are readily fatigued by physical and mental work. (As to the latter, there are remarkable exceptions. Some very obese people can turn out a great amount of work, and are almost indefatigable in their constant activity.) Each case should be considered individually, and with reference to the respective family history. If the obese person [209]comes from a healthy, long lived family and shows no circulatory disturbances, no strong objections can be raised to him or to her. But, as a general proposition, it must be laid down that obesity is a dysgenic factor.

Obesity should be seen as a negative hereditary factor. People who are obese are more likely to suffer from heart disease, asthma, strokes, gallstones, gout, diabetes, and constipation; they also have a harder time recovering from pneumonia and serious infections, and they are considered higher-risk patients during major surgeries. Additionally, they tend to tire easily from both physical and mental tasks. (However, there are notable exceptions. Some very obese individuals can produce a lot of work and seem almost tireless in their continuous activities.) Each case needs to be evaluated on its own, taking into account the individual’s family history. If an obese person [209]comes from a healthy, long-lived family and shows no signs of circulatory issues, there aren’t strong reasons to be concerned about them. But as a general rule, it should be stated that obesity is a negative hereditary factor.

But bear in mind that obesity and stoutness are not synonymous terms.

But keep in mind that obesity and being overweight are not the same thing.


Arteriosclerosis

Arteriosclerosis means hardening of the arteries. All men over fifty are beginning to develop some degree of arteriosclerosis; but, if the process is very gradual, it may be considered normal and is not a danger to life; when, however, it develops rapidly and the blood pressure is of a high degree, there is danger of apoplexy. Consequently, arteriosclerosis and high blood pressure must be considered decided bars to marriage.

Arteriosclerosis means the hardening of the arteries. Most men over fifty start to show some level of arteriosclerosis; however, if it develops very slowly, it can be seen as normal and isn't life-threatening. On the other hand, if it progresses quickly and blood pressure is significantly high, there’s a risk of stroke. Therefore, arteriosclerosis and high blood pressure should be seen as strong reasons against marriage.

It must be borne in mind that the sexual act is, in itself, a danger to arteriosclerotics and people with high blood pressure, because it may bring about rupture of a blood-vessel. There are many cases of sudden death from this cause of which the public naturally never learns. Married persons who find that they have arteriosclerosis or high blood pressure should abstain from sexual relations altogether or indulge only at rare intervals and moderately.

It’s important to remember that sexual activity can be dangerous for people with arteriosclerosis and high blood pressure, as it might lead to the rupture of a blood vessel. There are many instances of sudden death from this, which the public usually never hears about. Married individuals who know they have arteriosclerosis or high blood pressure should either completely avoid sexual relations or engage in them only occasionally and in moderation.


[210]Gout

A consideration of gout in connection with the question of heredity will show how near-sighted people can be, how they can go on believing a certain thing for centuries without analyzing, until somebody suddenly shows them the absurdity of the thing. Gout was always considered a typical hereditary disease; for it was seen in the grandfathers, fathers, children, grandchildren, and so on. So, certainly, it must be hereditary! It did not come to our doctors' minds to think that perhaps, after all, it was not heredity that was to blame, but simply that the same conditions that produced gout in the ancestors likewise produced it in their descendants.

A look at gout in relation to heredity will reveal how shortsighted people can be, holding on to certain beliefs for centuries without questioning them until someone points out their absurdity. Gout was always thought of as a typical hereditary disease; it was seen in grandfathers, fathers, children, grandchildren, and so on. So, it must be hereditary, right? It never occurred to our doctors that maybe it wasn’t heredity to blame, but rather that the same conditions that caused gout in the ancestors also caused it in their descendants.

We know now that gout is caused by excessive eating, excessive drinking, lack of exercise, and faulty elimination. And, since, as a general thing, children lead the same lives that their fathers did, they are likely to develop the same diseases as their fathers did. A poor man who leads an abstemious life doesn't develop gout, and if his children lead the same abstemious lives they do not develop gout. (There are some cases of gout among the poor, but they are very rare.) But if they should begin to gorge and live an improper life they would be prone to develop the disease.

We now know that gout is caused by overeating, drinking too much, not getting enough exercise, and poor elimination. And, since children generally live similar lifestyles to their fathers, they’re likely to develop the same illnesses. A poor person who lives a restrained life doesn’t get gout, and if their children live the same way, they won't get gout either. (There are some cases of gout among the poor, but they are very rare.) However, if they start to overindulge and live an unhealthy lifestyle, they would be more likely to develop the disease.

[211]The disease, therefore, cannot in any way be considered hereditary. In matrimony, gout in either of the couple is not a desirable quality, but it is not a bar to marriage; and, if the candidate individually is healthy and free from gout, the fact that there was gout in the ancestry should play no rôle.

[211]So, the disease shouldn't be considered hereditary at all. In marriage, having gout in either partner is not a good trait, but it doesn’t prevent marriage. If the individual is healthy and free from gout, then their family's history of gout shouldn’t matter.


Mumps

Mumps is the common name for what is technically called parotitis (or parotiditis). Parotitis is an inflammation of the parotid glands. The parotid glands are situated, one on each side, immediately in front and below the external ear, and they are between one-half and one ounce in weight. They belong to the salivary glands; that is, they manufacture saliva, and each parotid gland has a duct through which it pours the saliva into the mouth. These ducts open opposite the second upper molar teeth.

Mumps is the common name for what’s technically called parotitis (or parotiditis). Parotitis is an inflammation of the parotid glands. The parotid glands are located, one on each side, just in front of and below the external ear, and they weigh between half an ounce and an ounce. They are part of the salivary glands, which means they produce saliva, and each parotid gland has a duct through which it releases saliva into the mouth. These ducts open across from the second upper molar teeth.

We might be surprised to be told that these parotid glands can have anything to do with the sex organs, but there is no other remote organ that has such a close and rather mysterious relationship with the sex-glands as have the parotids. When the parotid glands, either one or both, are inflamed, the testicles or ovaries are also liable to be attacked by inflammation. The inflammation of the testicles may [212]be so severe as to cause them to shrivel and dry up; or, even when no shrivelling, no atrophy of the testicles occurs, they may be so affected as to become incapable of producing spermatozoa. Moreover, in cases where the testicles of a mumps patient seemingly were not attacked—that is, where the patient was not aware of any inflammation, having no pain and no other symptoms—the testicles may have become incapable of generating spermatozoa.

We might be surprised to learn that these parotid glands are related to the sex organs, but no other distant organ has such a close and somewhat mysterious connection to the sex glands as the parotids do. When the parotid glands, whether one or both, become inflamed, the testicles or ovaries can also become inflamed. The inflammation of the testicles may [212]be so severe that they can shrivel and dry up; or, even if there’s no shriveling or atrophy of the testicles, they may be affected enough to stop producing spermatozoa. Additionally, in cases where a mumps patient seemingly didn’t have their testicles affected—that is, where the patient experienced no pain or other symptoms—those testicles might still become incapable of producing spermatozoa.

Besides the testicles, the prostate gland, the secretion of which is necessary to the fertility of the spermatozoa, may also become affected and atrophied.

Besides the testicles, the prostate gland, which produces a secretion essential for sperm fertility, can also be affected and atrophied.

It is, therefore, a very common thing for men who had the mumps in their childhood to be found sterile.

It is, therefore, quite common for men who had the mumps during childhood to be found sterile.

As to the sexual power of mumps patients, that differs. Some patients lose their virility entirely; others remain potent, but become sterile.

As for the sexual power of mumps patients, that varies. Some patients completely lose their virility; others stay potent but become sterile.

The same thing happens to girls attacked by mumps. They may have a severe inflammation of the ovaries (ovaritis or oöphoritis) or the inflammation may be so mild as to escape notice. In either case, the girl when grown to womanhood may find herself sterile.

The same thing happens to girls who get mumps. They might experience a serious inflammation of the ovaries (ovaritis or oöphoritis), or the inflammation could be so mild that it goes unnoticed. In either case, when the girl grows into a woman, she may find herself unable to have children.

A man who never had any venereal disease, but who has had mumps, should have himself examined for sterility before he gets married. As explained [213]in the chapter "Marriage and Gonorrhea," we can, in the case of a man, easily find out whether he is fertile or sterile. But, in the case of a woman, we can not. Time, necessarily, has to answer that question. In all cases, mumps reduces the chances of fertility, and no man or woman who once had mumps should get married without informing the respective partner of the fact. There should be no concealment before marriage. When the partners to the marriage contract know of the facts, they can then decide as to whether or not the marriage is desirable to them.

A man who has never had any sexually transmitted infection but has had mumps should get tested for sterility before getting married. As explained [213]in the chapter "Marriage and Gonorrhea," it's easy to determine a man's fertility, but it’s not the same for women. Time has to reveal that. In any case, mumps can reduce fertility chances, so anyone who has had mumps should tell their partner before marriage. There shouldn't be any secrets before tying the knot. When both partners know the facts, they can make an informed decision about whether the marriage is right for them.


Hemophilia, or Bleeders' Disease

Hemophilia is a peculiar disease, consisting in frequent and often uncontrollable hemorrhages. The least cut or the pulling of a tooth may cause a severe or even dangerous hemorrhage. The slightest blow, squeeze or hurt will cause ecchymoses, or discolorations of the skin. The peculiarity of this hereditary disease is, that it attacks almost exclusively the males, but is transmitted almost exclusively through the female members. For instance, Miss A., herself not a bleeder, comes from a bleeder-family. She marries and has three boys and three girls; the three boys will be bleeders, the three girls will not; the three boys marry and have [214]children; their children will not be bleeders; the three girls marry, and their male children will be bleeders.

Hemophilia is a unique condition that leads to frequent and often uncontrollable bleeding. Even a small cut or pulling a tooth can result in severe or potentially dangerous bleeding. The slightest bump, squeeze, or injury can cause bruising on the skin. What makes this hereditary condition distinctive is that it primarily affects males, while it's mostly passed down through females. For example, Miss A., who is not a bleeder herself, comes from a family of bleeders. She gets married and has three sons and three daughters; the three sons will be bleeders, while the three daughters will not. The three sons marry and have [214]children; their children will not be bleeders. The three daughters marry, and their male children will be bleeders.

What is the lesson? The lesson is, that boys who are bleeders may marry, because they will most likely not transmit the disease; but girls who come from a hemophilic family, irrespective of whether they themselves are hemophilics or not, must not marry, because most likely they will transmit the disease.

What’s the lesson? The lesson is that boys with hemophilia can marry because they probably won’t pass on the disease. However, girls from a hemophilic family, whether they have hemophilia or not, shouldn’t marry because they are likely to transmit the disease.


Anemia

Anemia is a poor condition of the blood. The blood may contain an insufficient number of red blood cells or an insufficient percentage of the coloring matter of the blood, that is, hemoglobin. A special kind of anemia affecting young girls is called chlorosis.

Anemia is a condition where the blood is not in good shape. It may have too few red blood cells or not enough hemoglobin, which is the substance that gives blood its color. A specific type of anemia that affects young girls is known as chlorosis.

Anemia and chlorosis cannot be considered contra-indications to marriage, because they are usually amenable to treatment. In fact, some cases of anemia and chlorosis are due to the lack of normal sexual relations, and the subjects get well very soon after marriage. But it is best and safest to subject anemic patients to a course of treatment and to improve their condition before they marry.

Anemia and chlorosis shouldn’t be seen as reasons not to marry since they can usually be treated. In fact, some cases of anemia and chlorosis are caused by a lack of normal sexual activity, and people often recover quickly after getting married. However, it's best and safest for anemic patients to undergo treatment and improve their health before they tie the knot.


[215]Epilepsy

While epilepsy—known commonly as fits or falling sickness—is not as hereditary as it was one time thought to be, its hereditary character being ascertainable in only about 5 per cent. of cases, nevertheless, it is a decidedly dysgenic agent, and marriage with an epileptic is distinctly advised against. Where both parents are epileptics, the children are almost sure to be epileptic, and such a marriage should be prohibited by law. Under no circumstances should parents who are both epileptic bring children into the world. It should be the duty of the State to instruct them in methods of preventing conception.

While epilepsy—commonly known as seizures or falling sickness—is not as hereditary as it was once thought to be, with a hereditary factor identifiable in only about 5 percent of cases, it is still a strong dysgenic factor, and marrying someone with epilepsy is generally advised against. When both parents are epileptic, their children are very likely to be epileptic as well, and such a marriage should be legally prohibited. Under no circumstances should parents who are both epileptic have children. It should be the responsibility of the State to educate them on methods of preventing conception.


Hysteria

Hysteria is a disease the chief characteristics of which are a lack of control over one's emotions and acts, the imitation of the symptoms of various diseases, and an exaggerated self-consciousness. The patient may have extreme pain in the region of the head, ovaries, spine; in some parts of the skin there is extreme hypersensitiveness (hyperesthesia), so that the least touch causes great pain; in others, there is complete anesthesia—that is, absence of sensation—so that when you stick the patient with a needle she will not feel it. A very frequent [216]symptom is a choking sensation, as if a ball came up the throat and stuck there (globus hystericus). Then there may be spasms, convulsions, retention of urine, paralysis, aphonia (loss of voice), blindness, and a lot more. There is hardly a functional or organic nervous disorder that hysteria may not simulate.

Hysteria is a condition characterized by a lack of control over one's emotions and actions, the imitation of various disease symptoms, and an exaggerated self-awareness. The patient may experience intense pain in the head, ovaries, or spine; some areas of the skin may be extremely sensitive (hyperesthesia), so that even the slightest touch causes significant pain; in other areas, there may be complete numbness—meaning no sensation—so that if you poke the patient with a needle, she won’t feel it. A very common [216] symptom is a choking feeling, as if a ball is stuck in the throat (globus hystericus). There may also be spasms, convulsions, difficulty urinating, paralysis, loss of voice (aphonia), blindness, and more. Hysteria can often mimic almost any functional or organic nervous disorder.

Of late years our ideas about hysteria have undergone a radical change, and we now know that most, if not all, cases of hysteria are due to a repression or non-satisfaction of the sexual instinct or to some shock of a sexual character in childhood. Only too often a girl who was very hysterical before marriage loses her hysteria as if by magic upon contracting a satisfactory marriage. On the other hand, a healthy girl can become quickly hysterical if she marries a man who is sexually impotent or who is disagreeable to her and incapable of satisfying her sexually.

In recent years, our understanding of hysteria has completely changed. We now realize that most, if not all, cases of hysteria are caused by the repression or dissatisfaction of sexual instincts or by some sort of sexual trauma during childhood. It’s all too common for a girl who was very hysterical before marriage to lose her hysteria almost instantly after entering a satisfactory marriage. On the flip side, a healthy girl can quickly become hysterical if she marries a man who is sexually impotent or who is unappealing to her and unable to satisfy her sexually.

While hysteria, in itself, is not hereditary, it, nevertheless, is a question whether a strongly hysterical woman would make a satisfactory mother. The entire family history should be investigated. If the hysteria is found to be an isolated instance in the given girl, it may be disregarded, if not extreme; but if the entire family or several members of it are neuropathic, the condition is a dysgenic one. Marriage may be contracted, provided no [217]children are brought into the world until several years have elapsed and the mother's organization seems to have become more stable. In some cases, a child acts as a good medicine against hysteria. In short, every case must be examined individually on its merits, and the counsel of a good psychologist or psychoanalyst may prove very valuable.

While hysteria isn't hereditary, it raises the question of whether a highly hysterical woman would be a suitable mother. The family's entire history should be examined. If the hysteria appears to be an isolated case in a particular girl, it might be disregarded if it's not severe; however, if the whole family or several members have similar issues, then the situation is concerning. Marriage can take place, but no [217]children should be born for several years until the mother's condition seems to stabilize. In some cases, having a child can help with hysteria. In short, each case should be evaluated on its own, and the advice of a competent psychologist or psychoanalyst can be very beneficial.


Alcoholism

A good deal depends upon what we understand by alcoholism. The fanatics consider a person an alcoholic who drinks a glass of beer or wine with his meals. This is nonsense. This is not alcoholism, and cannot be considered a dysgenic factor. But, where there is a distinct habit, so that the individual must have his alcohol daily, or if he goes on an occasional drunken "spree," marriage must be advised against. And where the man (or woman) is what we call a real drunkard, marriage not only should be advised against, but most decidedly should be prohibited by law.

A lot depends on how we define alcoholism. Some extremists think anyone who has a glass of beer or wine with their meals is an alcoholic. That's ridiculous. This isn’t alcoholism, and it shouldn’t be seen as a negative genetic factor. However, if someone has a clear habit where they feel they *need* alcohol every day, or if they go on occasional drunken benders, marriage should be discouraged. And in cases where a person is what we would call a real drunkard, marriage not only should be discouraged, but definitely should be banned by law.

Alcoholism, as a habit, is one of the worst dysgenic factors to reckon with. First, the offspring is liable to be affected, which is sufficient in itself to condemn marriage with an alcoholic. Second, the earning powers of an alcoholic are generally diminished, and are likely gradually to diminish more and [218]more. Third, an alcoholic is irritable, quarrelsome, and is liable to do bodily injury to his wife. Fourth an alcoholic often develops sexual weakness or complete sexual impotence. Fifth, alcoholics are likely to develop extreme jealousy, which may become pathological, even to the extent of a psychosis.

Alcoholism, as a habit, is one of the most serious dysgenic factors to consider. First, the children are likely to be affected, which is reason enough to avoid marrying an alcoholic. Second, an alcoholic's earning potential is usually lower and is likely to continue decreasing more and more. Third, an alcoholic tends to be irritable, argumentative, and may physically harm their partner. Fourth, alcoholics often experience sexual issues or complete impotence. Fifth, alcoholics are prone to extreme jealousy, which can become pathological, potentially leading to a psychotic condition.

If both the husband and wife are alcoholics, then marriage between them which results in children is not merely a sin, but a crime.

If both the husband and wife are alcoholics, then their marriage, which leads to having children, is not just a sin but a crime.

We do not now come across cases so often as we used to of women marrying drunkards in the hope or with the hope of reforming them. But such cases still happen. This is a very foolish procedure. Let the man reform first, let him stay reformed for two or three years, and then the woman may take the chance, if she wants to.

We don't see as many cases anymore of women marrying alcoholics in the hope of changing them. But it still happens. This is a very foolish approach. Let the man get better first, let him stay that way for two or three years, and then the woman can consider the possibility if she wants to.


Feeblemindedness

Feeblemindedness, in all its gradations—including idiocy, imbecility, moronism, and so on—is strongly hereditary and is one of the most dysgenic factors we have to deal with. It is the most dysgenic of all factors. It is more dysgenic than insanity. Marriage with a feebleminded person not only should be advised against, but should be prohibited by law. A feebleminded man has much fewer chances for marriage than has a feebleminded [219]woman. Feebleminded girls, even to the extent of being morons, if pretty (as they often are) have very good chances of getting married, not infrequently getting for husbands young men of good families who themselves of course are not very strong mentally, but still are far from being considered feebleminded.

Feeblemindedness, in all its forms—including idiocy, imbecility, moronism, and so on—is highly hereditary and is one of the most detrimental factors we face. It is the most harmful of all factors. It is more detrimental than insanity. Marrying someone who is feebleminded should not only be discouraged but also legally prohibited. A feebleminded man has much lower chances of getting married compared to a feebleminded [219]woman. Feebleminded girls, even those classified as morons, if they are attractive (which they often are), have a good chance of getting married, often securing husbands who come from good families, but who themselves may not be very mentally strong, yet are still far from being considered feebleminded.

There are many cases of brilliant men—more than the public has any idea of—who married pretty, shy, demure, but withal feebleminded, girls, and the result has been in the largest percentage of cases very disastrous. In many cases all the children are feebleminded, or if not feebleminded, so weak mentally that it is impossible to make them go through any college or school. All the private tutoring is often in vain. And the brilliant father's heart breaks. It must be borne in mind that feeblemindedness or weak mentality is much more difficult to detect in a woman than it is in a man. Weakmindedness in a woman often passes for "cuteness," and as among the conservatives a woman is not expected to be able to discuss current topics, her intellectual caliber is often not discovered by the blinded husband until some weeks after the marriage ceremony.

There are many cases of brilliant men—more than the public realizes—who married pretty, shy, demure, yet intellectually limited girls, and the outcome has often been very unfortunate. In many instances, all the children are intellectually challenged, or if they aren't, they are so weak mentally that it's impossible to get them through any college or school. All the private tutoring often ends up being useless. And the brilliant father's heart breaks. It's important to remember that intellectual limitations are much harder to detect in women than in men. Weakness in a woman often gets mistaken for "cuteness," and since traditionalists don’t expect women to discuss current topics, a husband might not recognize his wife's intellectual capacity until weeks after the wedding.

As any instruction in the use of contraceptives would be wasted on the feebleminded, the only way [220]to guard the race against pollution with feebleminded stock is either to segregate or to sterilize them. Society could have no objection against the feebleminded marrying or indulging in sexual relations, provided it could be assured that they will not bring any feebleminded stock into the world. After the man and the woman have been sterilized there is no objection to their getting married.

As any guidance on using contraceptives would be pointless for those with intellectual disabilities, the only ways to protect the population from being mixed with those who are intellectually disabled are either to separate them or to sterilize them. Society wouldn’t have any issue with people who are intellectually disabled getting married or being sexually active, as long as it could be guaranteed that they wouldn't have children with intellectual disabilities. Once the man and woman have been sterilized, there are no objections to them getting married.

Where a normal, able or brilliant husband finds out too late that his wife's mentality is of rather a low order he is certainly justified in using contraceptives; and if he is determined to have children he will be obliged to divorce his wife. Of course this applies also to the wife of a weak minded husband.

Where a normal, capable, or intelligent husband realizes too late that his wife's mindset is somewhat limited, he is certainly justified in using contraceptives; and if he is set on having children, he will have no choice but to divorce his wife. Of course, this also applies to the wife of a weak-minded husband.


Insanity

Insanity may be briefly defined as a disease of the mind. We will not here go into a discussion as to what constitutes real insanity, as to what is understood by insanity in the legal sense of the term, and so on, except to note that we have two divisions.

Insanity can be simply defined as a mental illness. We won’t get into what actually defines true insanity, what insanity means in a legal context, and so on, except to mention that we have two categories.

One is functional insanity. This may be temporary, or periodical, and is due to some external cause, is curable, and is not hereditary. For instance, a person may get insane from a severe shock, from trouble, from anxiety, from a severe accident [221](such as a shipwreck), from a sudden and total loss of his fortune, of his wife and children (by fire, earthquake, shipwreck or railroad accident). Such insanities are curable and are not transmissible. Another example is what is known as puerperal insanity. Some women during childbirth, due probably to some toxic infection, become insane. This insanity may be extreme and maniacal in character. Still, it often passes away in a few days without leaving any trace and may never return again, or, if it does return, it may return only during another childbirth. This kind of insanity is not transmissible.

One type is functional insanity. This can be temporary or occasional, caused by external factors, is treatable, and isn’t inherited. For example, a person might become insane from a severe shock, stress, anxiety, a serious accident [221] (like a shipwreck), or a sudden loss of their wealth, spouse, or children (due to fire, earthquake, shipwreck, or train accident). These types of insanity can be cured and are not passed down. Another example is puerperal insanity. Some women may experience insanity during childbirth, likely due to a toxic infection. This insanity can be extreme and maniacal, but it often resolves in a few days without leaving any trace and may never come back, or if it does, it might only occur during another childbirth. This form of insanity is not transmissible.

The second division is what we call organic insanity. This expresses itself in mania and melancholy, so-called manic-depressive insanity. This is due to a degeneration of the brain-and nerve-tissue and is hereditary.

The second division is what we call organic insanity. This shows up as mania and depression, often referred to as manic-depressive insanity. It's caused by a decline in brain and nerve tissue and is passed down through families.

But, our entire conception as to the hereditary transmissibility of insanity has undergone a radical change. There is hardly another disease the fear of whose hereditary character is responsible for so much anguish and torture. In former years, when there was an insane uncle or aunt or grandparent that fact weighed like a veritable incubus on the entire family. Every member of the family was tortured by the secret anguish that maybe he or she [222]would be next to be affected by this most horrible of all diseases—disease of the mind. If an ancestral member of the family became insane at a certain age, every member of that family was living in fear and trembling until several years had passed after that critical age, and only then would they begin to breathe freely. Indeed, many people became insane from the very fear of becoming insane. It cannot be subject to any doubt that many people do become mentally unbalanced from the fear that they will become unbalanced. Fear has a tremendous influence on the purely bodily functions, but its influence on the mental functions is incomparably greater, and a person will often get that which he fears he is going to get.

But our entire understanding of the hereditary nature of mental illness has changed dramatically. There’s hardly another condition whose genetic stigma causes so much distress and suffering. In the past, if someone had an insane uncle, aunt, or grandparent, that fact loomed over the whole family like a heavy burden. Each family member suffered from the secret anxiety that they might be the next to experience this terrible affliction—mental illness. If a family member became mentally ill at a certain age, everyone in the family lived in fear and anxiety until several years had passed after that critical age, and only then would they start to feel safe again. In fact, many people ended up mentally ill simply from the fear of becoming mentally ill. It’s clear that many individuals become mentally unstable from the worry that they will lose their sanity. Fear significantly impacts physical health, but its effect on mental health is even greater, and a person often ends up facing what they fear the most.

Now the hereditary character of insanity is not taken in the same absolute sense in which it was formerly. While we still consider it a dysgenic factor, yet we recognize the paramount importance of environment; and we know that by proper bringing-up, using the expression bringing-up in its broadest sense—including a proper mental and physical discipline—any hereditary taint can be counteracted. In connection with this subject, the following very recent statistics will prove of interest.

Now, the inherited nature of mental illness isn't viewed as rigidly as it was before. While we still think of it as a genetic issue, we also understand how crucial the environment is. We know that with proper upbringing—meaning a comprehensive approach that includes both mental and physical training—we can counteract any hereditary predisposition. Regarding this topic, the following recent statistics will be intriguing.

The families of 558 insane persons cared for in the London county asylums were investigated, and, [223]according to reports received from the educational authorities, only 15 of these (less than 3 per cent) had mentally defective children. As to the time of the birth of the children, whether before or after the attack of the insanity, we find the following figures: 56 out of 573 parents had children after their first attack of insanity, and 106 children were born after the onset of insanity in the parent; while the remaining 1259 children were born before the parent became insane.

The families of 558 individuals with mental illness cared for in the London county asylums were examined, and, [223]based on reports from the educational authorities, only 15 of these (less than 3 percent) had children with intellectual disabilities. Regarding the timing of the children's births, whether before or after the onset of mental illness, we see the following figures: 56 out of 573 parents had children after their first episode of mental illness, and 106 children were born following the onset of mental illness in the parent; while the remaining 1,259 children were born before the parent developed mental illness.

Altogether, as will be seen from a discussion of the various factors rendering marriage permissible or nonpermissible, I am inclined to consider environment a more important factor than heredity. The purely physical characteristics bear the indelible impress of heredity. But the moral and cultural characteristics, which in the modern civilized man are much more important than the physical, are almost exclusively the results of environment.

Overall, as we’ll see from discussing the different factors that make marriage acceptable or unacceptable, I tend to believe that environment is a more significant factor than heredity. The purely physical traits clearly show the strong influence of heredity. However, the moral and cultural traits, which are much more vital in modern civilized society than physical traits, primarily come from the environment.


Neuroses—Neurasthenia—Psychasthenia—Neuropathy—Psychopathy

I will not attempt either exhaustive or concise definitions of the terms named in the caption, for the simple reason that it is impossible to give satisfactory definitions of them. The conditions which these terms designate do not constitute definite [224]disease-entities, and many different things are understood by different people when these terms are mentioned. Only brief indications of the meaning will be given.

I won’t try to provide complete or short definitions for the terms listed in the title because it’s simply not possible to give satisfactory definitions. The conditions these terms refer to don’t form clear [224]disease entities, and different people have various interpretations of these terms. I’ll only provide brief descriptions of their meanings.

Neurosis is a functional disease of the nervous system.

Neurosis is a functional disorder of the nervous system.

Neurasthenia is a condition of nervous exhaustion, brought about by various causes, such as overwork, worry, fright, sexual excesses, sexual abstinence, and so on. The basis of neurasthenia, however, is often or even generally a hereditary taint, a nervous weakness inherited from the parents.

Neurasthenia is a condition of nervous exhaustion caused by different factors like overwork, anxiety, shock, excessive sexual activity, sexual abstinence, and more. However, the root of neurasthenia is often, or even usually, a hereditary issue, a nervous weakness passed down from parents.

Psychasthenia is a neurosis or psychoneurosis similar to neurasthenia, characterized by an exhaustion of the nervous system, also by weakness of the will, overscrupulousness, fear, and a feeling of the unreality of things.

Psychasthenia is a type of neurosis or psychoneurosis similar to neurasthenia, characterized by nervous system exhaustion, as well as a lack of willpower, excessive worrying, fear, and a sense of the unreality of things.

Neuropathy is a disease or disorder of the nervous system. Psychopathy is a disease or disorder of the mind.

Neuropathy is a condition that affects the nervous system. Psychopathy is a condition that affects the mind.

Of late years we often hear people referred to as neurotics, neurasthenics, psychasthenics, neuropaths or psychopaths. These are undoubtedly abnormal conditions, and, taken as a general thing, they are dysgenic factors.

Lately, we often hear people being called neurotics, neurasthenics, psychasthenics, neuropaths, or psychopaths. These are definitely abnormal conditions, and generally speaking, they are factors that negatively impact genetic health.

But a dysgenic factor in an animal is a dysgenic [225]factor, and that is all there is to it. There are no two sides to the question. But if anything goes to show the difference between animals and human beings, and to demonstrate why principles of eugenics, as derived from a study of animals, can never be fully applicable to human beings, it is these considerations which we now have under discussion. To repeat, neuroses, neurasthenia, psychasthenia, and the various forms of neuropathy and psychopathy are dysgenic factors. But people suffering from these conditions often are among the world's greatest geniuses, have done some of the world's greatest work, and, if we prevented or discouraged marriage among people who are somewhat "abnormal" or "queer," we should deprive the world of some of its greatest men and women. For insanity is allied to genius, and if we were to exterminate all mentally or nervously abnormal people we should at the same time exterminate some of the men and women that have made life worth living.

But a dysgenic factor in an animal is a dysgenic [225] factor, and that’s all there is to it. There aren’t two sides to this issue. However, if anything highlights the difference between animals and humans, and explains why the principles of eugenics, based on the study of animals, can never be fully applied to humans, it’s these discussions we’re having now. To reiterate, neuroses, neurasthenia, psychasthenia, and various forms of neuropathy and psychopathy are dysgenic factors. Yet individuals with these conditions are often among the world's greatest geniuses, have created some of the world’s most significant work, and if we were to prevent or discourage marriage among people who are somewhat "abnormal" or "different," we would rob the world of some of its greatest individuals. Insanity is linked to genius, and if we were to eliminate all mentally or nervously abnormal people, we would simultaneously erase some of the men and women who have made life truly worthwhile.

And what is true of mentally abnormal is also true of physically inferior people. An inferior horse or dog is inferior. There is no compensation for the inferiority. But a man may be physically inferior, he may be, for instance, a consumptive, but still he may have given to the world some of the sweetest and most wonderful poems. A man may be lame, [226]or deaf, or strabismic, he may be a hunchback or a cripple and altogether physically repulsive, and yet he may be one of the world's greatest philosophers or mathematicians. A man may be sexually impotent and absolutely useless for race purposes, yet may be one of the world's greatest singers or greatest discoverers.

And what's true for those with mental disabilities is also true for those who are physically less capable. An inferior horse or dog is simply inferior. There’s no making up for that inferiority. But a man might be physically weak, like someone with tuberculosis, and still have produced some of the most beautiful and amazing poems. A person could be lame, [226] deaf, or cross-eyed, or even have a hunchback or be a cripple who seems entirely unattractive, yet they could still be one of the greatest philosophers or mathematicians in the world. A man may be unable to have children and completely useless for reproduction, yet he might be one of the greatest singers or inventors the world has ever seen.

In short, the eugenic problem in the human is not, and never will be, as simple as it is in the animal and vegetable kingdoms. If we want to strive after healthy, normal mediocrity, then the principles of animal eugenics become applicable to the human race. If, on the other hand, we want talent, if we want genius, if we want benefactors of the human race, then we must go very slow with our eugenic applications.

In short, the eugenics issue in humans is not, and will never be, as straightforward as it is in the animal and plant kingdoms. If we aim for a healthy, average standard, then the principles of animal eugenics can be applied to humans. However, if we want to foster talent, genius, or benefactors for humanity, we need to proceed very cautiously with our eugenics applications.


Drug Addiction or Narcotism

Addiction to drugs, whether it be opium, morphine, heroin or cocaine, is a strongly dysgenic factor. The addiction to the drug is of itself not transmissible, but the weakened constitution or degeneracy which is generally responsible for the development of the drug addiction is inheritable.

Addiction to drugs, whether it's opium, morphine, heroin, or cocaine, is a major negative factor for genetic health. The addiction itself isn’t passed down, but the underlying weak constitution or decline that usually leads to drug addiction can be inherited.

A few cases of drug addiction are external; that is, the patient may have a good healthy constitution, no hereditary taint, and still because during some [227]sickness he was given morphine a number of times he may have developed an addiction to the drug. But those cases are rare. And such cases, if they are cured and if the addiction is completely overcome, may marry.

A few cases of drug addiction stem from external factors; that is, a person might have a strong, healthy constitution and no family history of addiction, yet still become addicted to morphine if they were given the drug multiple times during some [227] illness. However, those cases are uncommon. If they manage to overcome the addiction completely, they can still marry.

But in most cases it isn't the drug addiction that causes the degeneracy; it is the degeneracy or the neuropathic or psychopathic constitution that causes the drug addiction. And such cases are bad matrimonial risks.

But in most cases, it's not the drug addiction that leads to the decline; it's the decline or the neuropathic or psychopathic traits that lead to the drug addiction. And these cases pose serious risks in marriage.

And it is a very risky thing for a woman to marry an addict with the idea of reforming him. As I said about the alcoholic: Let him reform first, let him stay reformed for a few years, and then the rest is not so great.

And it's really risky for a woman to marry someone with an addiction thinking she can change him. As I mentioned about the alcoholic: Let him get better first, let him stay sober for a few years, and then the rest isn’t such a big deal.


Consanguineous Marriages

Consanguinity means blood relationship, and consanguineous marriages are marriages between near blood relatives. The physician is frequently consulted as to the permissibility or danger of marriages between near relations. The question generally concerns first cousins, second cousins, uncle and niece, and nephew and aunt.

Consanguinity refers to blood relationships, and consanguineous marriages are unions between close blood relatives. Doctors are often asked about the acceptability or risks of marriages among close relatives. This usually involves questions about first cousins, second cousins, uncles and nieces, and nephews and aunts.

The popular idea is that consanguineous marriages are bad per se. The children of near relatives, such as first cousins, are apt to be defective, deaf and d[228]umb, blind, or feebleminded, and what not. This popular idea, as so many popular ideas are, is wrong. And still there is of course, as there always is, some foundation for it. The matter, however, is quite simple.

The popular belief is that marriages between relatives are harmful per se. Children of close relatives, like first cousins, are likely to have defects, be deaf, d[228]umb, blind, or have intellectual disabilities, among other issues. This common belief, like many others, is incorrect. Yet, there is always some truth behind it. However, the issue is quite straightforward.

We know that many traits, good and bad, are transmitted by heredity. And naturally when traits are possessed by both father and mother they stand a much greater chance of being transmitted to the offspring than if possessed by one of the parents alone. Now then, if a certain bad trait, such as epilepsy or insanity, is present in a family that trait is present in both cousins, and the likelihood of children from such a marriage inheriting that trait is much greater than when the parents are strangers, the taint being present in the family of only one of the parents. But if there be no hereditary taint in the cousins' family, and, still more, if the family is an intelligent one, if there are geniuses in the family, then there cannot be the slightest objection to marriage between cousins, and the children of such marriages are apt to inherit in a strong degree the talents or genius of their ancestors. In short, if the family is a bad one, one below par, then marriage between cousins or between uncle and niece should be forbidden. If the family is a good one, above par, then[229] marriage between relatives of that family should be encouraged.

We know that many traits, both positive and negative, are passed down through genetics. Naturally, when both parents have a certain trait, there's a much higher chance that trait will be passed on to their children than if only one parent has it. So, if a harmful trait, like epilepsy or mental illness, is present in a family, that trait is likely to be found in both cousins, increasing the chances of their children inheriting it compared to parents who aren’t related, where the issue would only come from one side of the family. However, if there’s no hereditary issue in the cousins’ family, and even more so if the family is one of high intelligence or has had geniuses, then there’s no legitimate reason to prohibit marriage between cousins. In fact, children from such marriages are likely to inherit the talents or brilliance of their ancestors. In summary, if the family has negative traits, then marriage between cousins or between an uncle and niece should be avoided. If the family has positive traits, then[229] marriages between relatives in that family should be encouraged.

The idea that the children from consanguineous marriages are apt to be deaf and dumb has no foundation in fact. Recent statistics from various asylums in Germany, for instance, have shown that only about five per cent. of the deaf and dumb children were the offspring of consanguineous marriages. If 95 per cent, of the deaf and dumb had non-consanguineous parents, how could one say that even in the other five per cent, the consanguinity was the cause? If it were the other way around, then of course we could blame consanguinity. As it is, we can assume even in this five per cent, a mere coincidence, and we have no right to say that consanguinity and deaf and dumbness stand in the relation to each other of cause and effect.

The idea that children from related marriages are likely to be deaf and mute has no basis in reality. Recent statistics from various asylums in Germany, for example, show that only about five percent of deaf and mute children came from related marriages. If 95 percent of deaf and mute children had parents who were not related, how can we say that the five percent with related parents are due to that relationship? If it were the opposite, then we could attribute it to being related. As it stands, we can assume that even in this five percent, it’s just a coincidence, and we have no right to claim that being related and being deaf and mute are linked as cause and effect.

It is interesting to know that among the Egyptians, Persians, and Incas of Peru close consanguineous marriages were very common. The Egyptian kings generally married their sisters. This was common custom and if the children born of such unions were defectives or monstrosities the fact would have become quickly apparent and the custom would have been abolished. Evidently the offspring of very close consanguinity was normal, [230]or even above normal, or the practice would not have been continued such a long time.

It’s interesting to note that among the Egyptians, Persians, and Incas of Peru, close relatives often got married. Egyptian kings typically married their sisters. This was a common practice, and if the children from these marriages were born with defects or abnormalities, it would have become obvious quickly, leading to the end of the custom. Clearly, the children born from such close relationships were normal, [230] or even above normal, otherwise the practice wouldn't have lasted so long.

It is perhaps worth while noting that one of the world's greatest scientists, Charles Darwin, was the child of parents who were first cousins.

It might be important to mention that one of the world's greatest scientists, Charles Darwin, was the child of parents who were first cousins.


Homosexuality

Homosexuality (homos—the same) is a perversion in which a person is attracted not to persons of the opposite but to persons of the same sex. Thus a homosexual man does not care for women, but is attracted to men. A homosexual woman is not attracted to men; she only cares for women and may even loathe men. A homosexual, man or woman, has no right to marry. The wrong committed by a homosexual marrying is a double one: it is wrong to the partner, wrong to the children. The normal partner is bound to discover the abnormality, and if he (or she) does, then the married life is a very unhappy one. Even if the abnormal partner uses the utmost efforts to conceal the abnormality, he cannot afford any pleasure to the normal partner, because the sexual act committed under loathing cannot be satisfactory. The other wrong is committed on the offspring. Homosexuality is hereditary, and nobody has a right to bring homosexuals into the world, for there is no unhappier being than a[231] homosexual. I know a homosexual woman, who, knowing her abnormality, married for the sake of a comfortable home. She has been successful in hiding from her husband her abnormality, he simply considering her frigid. But each sexual act costs her tortures. So far she has succeeded in avoiding pregnancy. I also know a highly refined and educated homosexual gentleman, who married before understanding his condition. Many homosexuals, not knowing that such a thing as homosexuality even exists, do not understand their own condition; they feel a little strange, a little puzzled, but they don't know that they ought not to marry. Soon after marrying his condition became clear to him, but in the meantime his wife conceived, and he is now the father of a healthy, good-looking boy. It is possible that with proper bringing up the development of any homosexual traits will be prevented. It should be borne in mind that long sexual repression is favorable to the development of homosexuality.

Homosexuality (homos—the same) is a deviation where a person is attracted not to the opposite sex but to individuals of the same sex. So, a homosexual man isn’t interested in women; he is drawn to men. A homosexual woman doesn’t have feelings for men; she's only interested in women and may even dislike men. A homosexual person, whether man or woman, should not marry. The mistake of a homosexual marrying is twofold: it’s unfair to their partner and wrong for any children involved. The typical partner will eventually discover this difference, and if they do, married life can become very unhappy. Even if the homosexual partner tries hard to hide their true nature, they can't bring pleasure to the typical partner, because engaging in sex while feeling disgusted doesn’t lead to satisfaction. The other mistake impacts the children. Homosexuality can run in families, and no one should bring homosexuals into the world, as there's no sadder existence than that of a homosexual. I know a homosexual woman who, aware of her orientation, married for the sake of having a stable home. She has successfully hidden her orientation from her husband, who thinks she’s just uninterested in sex. But every sexual encounter is a struggle for her. So far, she has managed to avoid getting pregnant. I also know a well-educated and cultured homosexual man who married before recognizing his orientation. Many homosexuals, not realizing that homosexuality even exists, are confused about their feelings; they sense something is off but don’t realize they shouldn’t marry. Shortly after he married, his feelings became clear, but by then, his wife was pregnant, and he is now the father of a healthy, good-looking boy. It’s possible that with the right upbringing, any homosexual tendencies can be avoided. It’s important to remember that long-term sexual repression can encourage the development of homosexuality.

But to emphasize: homosexuality is a dysgenic factor, and no homosexual should marry.

But to emphasize: homosexuality is a negative factor for genetic diversity, and no homosexual should marry.


Sadism

Sadism is a sexual perversion in which the person derives pleasure only when beating, biting, striking, or otherwise inflicting pain on the person of the [232]opposite sex. The degree of cruelty varies, but all sadists should be shunned. Unfortunately the fact that a man is a sadist is often not found out until after marriage, but as soon as the wife has found it out she should leave the man and demand a divorce. Sadism is a sufficient ground for a separation or divorce. No person with any moral feeling in him or her should be responsible for bringing children into the world with a possible sadistic heredity.

Sadism is a sexual perversion where a person only feels pleasure from hurting, beating, biting, or otherwise inflicting pain on someone of the [232] opposite sex. The level of cruelty can vary, but all sadists should be avoided. Unfortunately, many women don’t realize their partner is a sadist until after marriage; once a wife discovers this, she should leave him and seek a divorce. Sadism is a valid reason for separation or divorce. No one with any moral values should risk bringing children into the world who might inherit sadistic tendencies.

Sadistic cruelty is often of the gross, brutal, repulsive kind, but sometimes the sadist inflicts on his "beloved" object refined tortures of which only a cunning "demon" is capable. The sufferings which the wives of some sadists have to undergo are known only to themselves and to a few—very few—physicians.

Sadistic cruelty is often crude, brutal, and disgusting, but sometimes the sadist subjects their "beloved" target to more sophisticated forms of torture that only a sly "demon" could devise. The pain that the wives of certain sadists endure is known only to them and to a very select group of doctors.


Masochism

Masochism is a sexual perversion in which the person, man or woman, likes to suffer pain, beatings, insults and other cruelties at the hands of the beloved object. It is a dysgenic factor but much less important than sadism.

Masochism is a sexual kink where a person, regardless of gender, enjoys experiencing pain, beatings, insults, and other forms of cruelty from their partner. It's a negative trait but significantly less impactful than sadism.


Sexual Impotence

Sexual impotence is not hereditary, but impotence in the male either so complete that he cannot [233]perform the act or consisting only in premature ejaculations (relative impotence or sexual insufficiency) should constitute a bar to marriage. This impotence may not interfere with impregnation; the wife may have children and the children will not be in any way defective, but the wife herself, unless she is completely frigid, will suffer the tortures of hell, and may quickly become a sexual neurasthenic, a nervous wreck, or she may even develop a psychosis. Any man suffering with impotence should have himself treated before marriage until he is cured; if his impotence is incurable, then for his own sake and for the sake of the girl or woman he is supposed to love he should give up the idea of marriage. The only permissible exception is in cases in which the prospective wife knows the nature of her prospective husband's trouble, and claims that she does not care for gross sexual relations and therefore does not mind the impotence. In case the wife is absolutely frigid, the marriage may turn out satisfactory. But I would always have my misgivings, and should the wife's apparently absent but in reality only dormant libido suddenly awaken there would be trouble for both husband and wife. It is therefore necessary to emphasize: in all cases of impotence—caution!

Sexual impotence isn't hereditary, but male impotence can be so complete that he cannot [233]perform the act or may just involve premature ejaculations (relative impotence or sexual insufficiency), which should be a barrier to marriage. This impotence might not prevent conception; the wife can have children, and those children won't be defective in any way. However, the wife herself, unless she is completely frigid, will suffer greatly and may quickly become a sexual neurasthenic, a nervous wreck, or even develop a psychosis. Any man dealing with impotence should seek treatment before marriage until he is cured; if his impotence is incurable, then for his own sake and for the sake of the woman he claims to love, he should reconsider the idea of marriage. The only exception is when the prospective wife knows about her fiancé's issue and says that she doesn’t care about direct sexual relations and thus doesn't mind the impotence. In cases where the wife is completely frigid, the marriage might work out fine. But I would always have my doubts, and if the wife's seemingly absent but actually dormant libido suddenly awakens, it could cause problems for both of them. Therefore, it's important to emphasize: in all cases of impotence—proceed with caution!


[234]Frigidity

Frigidity, as we have explained in a previous chapter, is a term applied to lack of sexual desire or sexual enjoyment in women. Of course many women before marriage are themselves ignorant of their sexual condition. Having learned to restrain their impulses, to repress any sexual stir, they themselves are often unable to say whether they have a strong or weak libido, or any at all. And whether or no a given woman would derive any pleasure from the sexual act can only be found out after marriage. Many girls, however, know very well whether they are "passionate" or not, but they wouldn't tell. They are afraid to confess to a complete lack of passion—they fear they might lose a husband.

Frigidity, as we discussed in a previous chapter, refers to a lack of sexual desire or enjoyment in women. Many women, especially before marriage, are often unaware of their sexual feelings. Having learned to control their impulses and suppress any sexual urges, they may find it difficult to identify whether their libido is strong, weak, or nonexistent. Whether a woman would find pleasure in sexual activity can usually only be discovered after marriage. However, many girls are quite aware of whether they are "passionate" or not, but they choose not to share this information. They are afraid to admit to a complete lack of passion—worried that it might cost them a potential husband.

Frigidity as an agent in marriage may be considered from two points of view: the offspring and the husband. The offspring is not affected by the mother's frigidity. A very frigid woman, if the frigidity is not due to serious organic causes, may have very healthy children and make an excellent mother. As far as the husband is concerned, it will depend a good deal on the degree of frigidity. If the woman is merely cold, and, while herself not enjoying the act, raises no objection to it, then it cannot be considered a bar to marriage. In fact many men, [235]themselves not overstrong sexually, are praying for somewhat frigid wives. (It must be stated, however, that to some husbands relations with frigid and non-participating wives are extremely distasteful.) But when the frigidity is of such a degree that it amounts to a strong physical aversion to the act, it should be considered a bar to marriage. Such frigidity is often the cause of a disrupted home, often leads to divorce and is legally considered a sufficient cause for divorce or for the annulment of marriage, the same as impotence in the man is.

Frigidity in marriage can be viewed from two main angles: the children and the husband. The children are not impacted by the mother's frigidity. A very frigid woman, as long as her frigidity isn't caused by serious medical issues, can have healthy children and be a great mother. Regarding the husband, it really depends on how frigid the woman is. If she’s just cold and doesn’t enjoy the act but doesn’t object to it, that shouldn't be a reason to avoid marriage. In fact, many men, [235] who aren’t very sexual themselves, actually prefer somewhat frigid wives. However, it's important to note that some husbands find being with frigid and unresponsive wives very unpleasant. But if the frigidity is intense enough to create a strong physical aversion to sex, that should be viewed as a legitimate reason to avoid marriage. Such frigidity frequently causes family issues, often leads to divorce, and is legally seen as sufficient grounds for divorce or annulment, just like impotence in men.


Excessive Libido in Men

We have seen that sexual impotence is a dysgenic factor and if complete and incurable should constitute a barrier to marriage. The opposite condition is that of excessive libido. Libido is the desire for the opposite sex. A proper amount of libido is normal and desirable. A lack of libido is abnormal. And an excess of libido is also abnormal. But a good many men are possessed of an excess of libido; it is either congenital or acquired. Some men torture their wives "to death," not literally but figuratively. Harboring the prevailing idea that a wife has no rights in this respect, that her body is not her own, that she must always hold herself ready to satisfy his abnormal desires, such a husband [236]exercises his marital rights without consideration for the physical condition or the mental feelings of his partner. Some husbands demand that their wives satisfy them daily from one to five or more times a day. Some wives who happen to be possessed of an equally strong libido do not mind these excessive demands (though in time they are almost sure to feel the evil effects), but if the wife possesses only a moderate amount of sexuality and if she is too weak in body and in will-power to resist her lord and master's demands, her health is often ruined and she becomes a wreck. (Complete abstinence and excessive indulgence often have the same evil end-results.) Some men "kill" four or five women before the fury of their libido is at last moderated. Of course, it is hard to find out a man's libido beforehand. But if a delicate girl or a woman of moderate sexuality has reasons to suspect that a man is possessed of an abnormally excessive libido, she would do well to think twice before taking the often irretrievable step.

We know that sexual impotence is a genetic issue, and if it's complete and incurable, it should prevent someone from getting married. The opposite issue is having too much libido. Libido is the desire for the opposite sex. A normal amount of libido is healthy and desirable. A lack of libido is not normal, and too much libido is also not normal. However, many men have an excess of libido, whether it’s something they were born with or something they've developed. Some men wear their wives down, figuratively speaking, not literally. They often believe that a wife has no rights in this area, that her body isn’t her own, and that she must always be available to meet his excessive desires. Such a husband [236]exercises his marital rights without considering the physical condition or mental well-being of his partner. Some husbands expect their wives to satisfy them daily, anywhere from one to five or more times a day. Some wives, who may also have a strong libido, don’t mind these demanding requests (although over time they may feel the negative consequences). But if a wife has only a moderate level of sexuality and is too weak in body and willpower to resist her husband’s demands, her health can deteriorate, and she may end up feeling devastated. (Complete abstinence and excessive indulgence can lead to the same harmful results.) Some men "destroy" four or five women before their intense libido finally calms down. It’s not always easy to know a man’s libido in advance. But if a delicate girl or a woman with moderate sexuality has reasons to suspect that a man has an unusually high libido, she should think carefully before making a decision that could be hard to reverse.

I have spoken so far of excessive libido in normal men, that is, in men who are otherwise normal, sane and can whenever necessary control their desires. There is a form of excessive libido in men called satyriasis, which reaches such a degree that the men are often not able to control their desires, and they [237]will satisfy their passion even if they know that the result is sure to be a venereal infection or several years in prison. Of course, satyriasis is a dysgenic factor; those suffering with that disorder are not normal; they are on the borderland of insanity, and not only should they not be permitted to marry, but they should be confined to institutions where they can be subjected to the proper treatment.

I have talked about excessive sex drive in normal men, meaning those who are otherwise typical, sane, and can control their desires whenever needed. There’s a type of excessive sex drive in men called satyriasis, which can become so intense that these men often struggle to control their urges, and they [237]will act on their desires even when they know it could lead to a venereal infection or several years in prison. Naturally, satyriasis is a genetic issue; those affected by this condition are not normal; they are on the edge of insanity, and not only should they not be allowed to marry, but they should also be placed in institutions where they can receive appropriate treatment.


Excessive Libido in Women

Just as we have impotent and excessively libidinous men, so we have frigid and excessively libidinous women. A wife possessed of excessive libido is a terrible calamity for a husband of a normal or moderate sexuality. Many a libidinous wife has driven her husband, especially if she is young and he is old, to a premature grave. And "grave" is used in the literal, not figurative, sense of the word. It would be a good thing if a man could find out the character of his future wife's libido before marriage. Unfortunately, it is impossible. At best, it can only be guessed at. But a really excessive libido on the part of either husband or wife should constitute a valid ground for divorce. When the libido in woman is so excessive that she cannot control her passion, and forgetting religion, morality, modesty, custom and possible social consequences, [238]she offers herself to every man she meets, we use the term nymphomania. It is a disease which corresponds to satyriasis in men, and what I said of satyriasis applies with equal force to nymphomania. Nymphomaniac women should not be permitted to marry or to run around loose, but should be confined to institutions in which they can be subjected to proper treatment.

Just as there are men who are impotent and those with excessive sexual desire, we also have women who are frigid and those with excessive sexual desire. A wife with a high sex drive can be a huge problem for a husband with a normal or moderate libido. Many a sexually driven wife has pushed her husband, especially if she's young and he's older, to an early death. And "death" is meant in the literal sense, not the figurative one. It would be helpful if a man could determine his future wife's sexual desires before marrying her. Unfortunately, this isn't possible; at best, he can only make an educated guess. However, having either spouse with a truly excessive libido should be a legitimate reason for divorce. When a woman's sexual desire is so overwhelming that she cannot control her urges, disregarding religion, morality, modesty, social norms, and potential consequences, [238] and she makes herself available to every man she encounters, we describe it as nymphomania. This condition is similar to satyriasis in men, and what I mentioned about satyriasis applies equally to nymphomania. Women with nymphomania shouldn't be allowed to marry or roam freely; they should be placed in facilities where they can receive appropriate treatment.


Harelip

This is a congenital defect consisting in a notch or split in the upper lip. It is due to defective development of the embryo and is as a rule found in association with cleft palate. Probably hereditary, but is not common and is not of much importance.

This is a birth defect characterized by a notch or split in the upper lip. It results from improper development of the embryo and is typically found alongside cleft palate. It’s likely hereditary, but it’s not very common and isn't usually of great significance.


Myopia

Myopia means nearsightedness. This defect is undoubtedly hereditary to a certain degree, but it is doubtful if, other conditions being favorable, any man would give up a girl because she is myopic or vice versa. Still, if the condition is extreme, as it sometimes is, it should be taken into consideration. And where both the man and the woman are strongly myopic some hesitation should be felt in contracting a marriage. If the husband alone is myopic, then the defect may be transmitted to the sons but [239]not to the daughters, and these daughters may in their turn transmit the defect to their sons but not to their daughters. In other words, the defect is more or less sex-limited.

Myopia means nearsightedness. This condition is definitely genetic to some extent, but it’s debatable whether anyone would refuse to date someone just because they are nearsighted, or the other way around, as long as other conditions are favorable. However, if the condition is severe, it should be taken into account. If both the man and the woman are significantly myopic, there should be some hesitation about getting married. If only the husband is myopic, this defect might be passed down to the sons but [239]not to the daughters. These daughters can then pass the defect to their sons but not to their daughters. In other words, the defect is somewhat sex-limited.


Astigmatism

This is a defect of the eye, depending upon some irregularity of the cornea or the lens, in which light rays in different meridians are not brought to the same focus. It is to a certain extent hereditary, but plays an insignificant rôle. It is an undesirable trait, but cannot be considered a dysgenic factor.

This is an eye issue caused by some irregularity in the cornea or lens, where light rays in different directions are not focused at the same point. It can be somewhat inherited, but it's not a major factor. It's an undesirable characteristic but shouldn't be seen as a dysgenic factor.


Baldness

Premature baldness is a decidedly inheritable trait. And so is premature grayness of the hair. But it is doubtful if any woman would permit these factors to play any rôle in her choice of a husband.

Premature baldness is definitely a genetic trait. So is premature graying of the hair. But it's unlikely that any woman would let these factors influence her choice of a husband.


Criminality

Almost a complete change has taken place in our ideas of criminality, and there are but very few criminologists now who believe in the Lombrosian nonsense of most criminality being inherited and being accompanied by physical stigmata of degeneration. The idea that the criminal is born and not made is now held only by an insignificant number of [240]thinkers. We know now that by far the greatest percentage of crime is the result of environment, of poverty, with all that that word implies, of bad bringing up, of bad companions. We know that the child of the criminal, properly brought up, will develop into a model citizen, and vice versa, the child of the saint, brought into the slums, might develop into a criminal.

Almost a complete shift has happened in our views on criminality, and there are very few criminologists today who still believe in the Lombrosian nonsense that most criminal behavior is inherited and shows physical signs of degeneration. The notion that criminals are born and not made is now only supported by an insignificant number of [240]thinkers. We now understand that the vast majority of crime results from environmental factors, poverty—everything that entails—poor upbringing, and negative influences. We know that a child of a criminal, when raised properly, can become a model citizen, while on the flip side, the child of a saint raised in the slums might turn into a criminal.

Then we must remember that there are many crimes which are not crimes, per se, but which are merely infractions of man-made laws, or representing rebellious acts against an unjust and cruel social order. Thus, for instance, a man or a woman who defying the law, would give information about birth control, and be convicted for the offence, would be legally a criminal. Morally he or she would be a high-minded humanitarian. A man who would throw a bomb at the Russian Czar or at a murderous pogrom-inciting Russian Governor would be considered an assassin, and if caught would be hanged; and in making up the pedigree of such a family, a narrow-minded eugenist would be apt to say that there was criminality in that family. But as a matter of fact, that "assassin" may have belonged to the noblest-minded heroes in history.

Then we need to remember that there are many acts that aren't crimes in the true sense, but are simply violations of man-made laws or acts of rebellion against an unjust and cruel social system. For example, a man or woman who breaks the law to provide information about birth control and gets convicted for it would be legally considered a criminal. Morally, though, they would be seen as a compassionate humanitarian. A person who throws a bomb at the Russian Czar or a murderous governor inciting pogroms would be labeled an assassin and, if caught, could be hanged; a narrow-minded eugenicist might even say there was criminality in that family’s history. But in reality, that "assassin" could belong to the ranks of the noblest heroes in history.

The eugenists will therefore pay little attention to criminality in the ancestry as a dysgenic factor. [241]As long as the matrimonial candidate himself is not a criminal, the ancestral criminality should constitute no bar to the marriage. It is not likely to show itself atavistically in the children. Altogether a good deal of nonsense has been written about atavism. And people forget that the same rules of heredity that are applied to physical conditions cannot be applied to spiritual and moral qualities, the latter being much more dependent upon environment than the former. Of course the various circumstances must be taken into consideration, and each case must be decided upon its merits. No generalizations can be permitted. The kind of crime must always be considered.

The eugenicists will therefore pay little attention to criminality in the family history as a bad genetic influence. [241]As long as the person looking to marry isn’t a criminal, their family's criminal history shouldn’t be a reason to prevent the marriage. It’s unlikely to appear in the children. A lot of nonsense has been written about atavism. People also forget that the same rules of heredity applied to physical traits cannot be used for spiritual and moral qualities, which are much more influenced by the environment. Of course, various circumstances must be considered, and each case should be judged on its own. No blanket statements can be made. The type of crime must always be taken into account.

And, furthermore, it should be borne in mind that not only is a criminal ancestry per se no bar to marriage, the marriage candidate himself may be an ex-criminal, may have served time in prison, and still be a very desirable father or mother from the eugenic viewpoint. A man who in a fit of passion or during a quarrel, perhaps under the slight influence of liquor, struck or killed a man is not, therefore, a real criminal. After serving his time in prison he may never again commit the slightest antisocial act, may make a moral citizen and an ideal husband and father.

And, what's more, we should remember that having a criminal background per se doesn't disqualify someone from getting married. The candidate for marriage could be an ex-convict, someone who has served time in prison, and still be a very good potential father or mother from a eugenic perspective. A man who, in a moment of passion or during an argument, perhaps while slightly intoxicated, harmed or killed another person is not necessarily a true criminal. After serving his sentence, he might never engage in any antisocial behavior again and could become a responsible citizen and an ideal husband and father.

This is not a plea for the under dog. For in this [242]case, where the future of the race is at stake, all other considerations must be put into the background. I simply plead for an intelligent consideration of the subject. Many honored citizens are worse criminals and worse fathers than many people who have served prison sentences.

This isn’t a call to support the underdog. In this [242] case, where the future of our community is at risk, everything else should be set aside. I’m just asking for a thoughtful look at the issue. Many respected citizens are more harmful and worse parents than those who have been in prison.


Pauperism

It may seem strange to discuss pauperism in relation to marriage and to speak of it as a hereditary factor, but it is necessary to discuss it, because considerable ignorance prevails on the subject, it being generally confused with poverty. There is a radical difference between pauperism and poverty. People may be poor for generations and generations, even very poor, and still not be considered or classed with paupers. Pauperism generally implies a lack of physical and mental stamina, loss of self-respect and unconquerable laziness. Of course we know now that laziness often rests upon a physical basis, being due to imperfect working of the internal glands. But whatever the cause of the laziness may be, the fact is that it is one of the characteristics of the pauper. And while we cannot speak of pauperism being hereditary, the qualities that go to make up the pauper are transmissible. No normal woman would marry a pauper, and the woman who would [243]marry a pauper is not amenable to any advice or to any book knowledge. But men are sometimes tempted to marry daughters of paupers if they happen to be pretty. They should consider the matter very carefully, for some of the ancestral traits may become manifest in the children.

It might seem odd to talk about poverty in connection with marriage and to view it as a hereditary issue, but it's important to address it because there's a lot of misunderstanding around the topic, often confused with being just plain poor. There’s a key difference between being a pauper and being poor. People can be poor for many generations and still not fall into the category of paupers. Pauperism usually involves a lack of physical and mental endurance, a loss of self-respect, and an ingrained laziness. Of course, we now understand that laziness can often stem from physical issues, such as problems with the internal glands. But regardless of the reason for the laziness, it remains a defining trait of paupers. While we can't say that pauperism is hereditary, the traits that define a pauper can be passed down. No self-respecting woman would choose to marry a pauper, and the woman who would [243] marry a pauper isn’t likely to heed any advice or learn from books. However, men sometimes find themselves attracted to the daughters of paupers if they are attractive. They should think this through very carefully, as some of the ancestral traits might show up in their children.







Chapter Thirty-twoToC

BIRTH CONTROL OR THE LIMITATION OF OFFSPRING

Knowledge of Prevention of Conception Essential—Misapprehensions Concerning Birth-control Propaganda—Modern Contraceptives Not Injurious to Health—Imperfection of Contraceptive Measures Due to Secrecy—Prevention of Conception and Abortion Radically Different—More Marriages Consummated if Birth-control Information were Legally Obtainable—Demand for Prostitution Would be Curtailed—Venereal Disease Due to Lack of Knowledge—Another Phase of the Birth-control Problem—Knowledge of Contraceptive Methods Where There Was a Taint of Insanity, and the Happy Results.

Knowledge of Contraception is Essential—Misunderstandings About Birth Control Advocacy—Modern Contraceptives Are Not Harmful to Health—The Imperfection of Contraceptive Methods Due to Secrecy—Preventing Conception and Abortion Are Completely Different—More Marriages Would Happen if Birth Control Information Were Legally Accessible—Demand for Prostitution Would Decrease—Sexually Transmitted Diseases Caused by Lack of Knowledge—Another Aspect of the Birth Control Issue—Understanding Contraceptive Methods Where There Was a History of Mental Illness, and the Positive Outcomes.


No girl, and no man for that matter, should enter the bonds of matrimony without learning the latest means of preventing conception, of regulating the number of offspring. With people who consider any attempt at regulating the number of children a sin, we have nothing to argue, though we believe that there are very few people except among the lowest dregs of society who do not use some measures of regulation. Otherwise we would see most families with ten to twenty children instead of two or three. Nor do I intend to devote this chapter to a detailed presentation of the arguments in favor of the [245]rational regulation of offspring. It would have to be merely a repetition of the arguments that I have presented elsewhere.[8] But a few points may well be touched upon here.

No girl, and no guy for that matter, should get married without knowing the latest ways to prevent pregnancy and control the number of kids. For those who see any effort to limit the number of children as a sin, we have nothing to discuss, although we believe that very few people, except for the lowest segments of society, don’t use some form of family planning. Otherwise, we would see most families with ten to twenty children instead of just two or three. I also don’t plan to spend this chapter going into detail about the arguments for rational family planning. That would just repeat points I’ve made before.[245][8] But a few points are worth mentioning here.

In spite of the fact that the subject of birth control is much better known now than it was when we first started to propagate it, still it cannot be mentioned too often, for the misapprehensions concerning it almost keep pace with the propaganda. First, there is a foolish notion that we would try to regulate the number of children forcibly, that we would compel people to have a small number of children. Nothing could apparently be more absurd, and still many people sincerely believe it. Nothing is further from the truth. On the contrary, much as we are in favor of birth control, we advise limitation of offspring only to those who for various reasons, financial, hereditary or hygienic, are unable to have many children. We emphatically believe that couples who are in excellent health, who are of untainted heredity, who are fit to bring up children, and have the means to do so, should have at least half a dozen children. If they should have one dozen, they would deserve the thanks of the community. All we claim is that in such an important matter as bringing children into the world, the [246]parents who have to carry the full burden of bringing up these children should have the right to decide. They should have the means of control. They should be able to say whether they will have two or six or one dozen children.

In spite of the fact that the topic of birth control is much better understood now than when we first started advocating for it, it still can't be mentioned too often, as the misunderstandings about it almost keep pace with the promotion. First, there’s a foolish idea that we would try to forcefully limit the number of children, that we would make people have fewer children. Nothing could be more ridiculous, and yet many people genuinely believe it. Nothing is further from the truth. On the contrary, while we strongly support birth control, we only recommend limiting the number of kids for those who, for various reasons—financial, hereditary, or health-related—can’t have many children. We firmly believe that couples who are in great health, who have no genetic issues, who are capable of raising children, and who have the resources to do so, should have at least six kids. If they have a dozen, they would deserve the community's gratitude. All we assert is that in such a crucial matter as bringing children into the world, the [246]parents who bear the full responsibility of raising these kids should have the right to decide. They should have control. They should be able to choose whether they'll have two, six, or twelve children.


Contraceptive Measures

And the argument that contraceptives are injurious to the health of the woman, of the man, or of both, may be curtly dismissed. It is not true of any of the modern contraceptives. But even if it were true, the amount of injury that can be done by contraceptives would be like a drop of water in comparison with the injuries resulting from excessive pregnancies and childbirths. Some of the contraceptive measures require some trouble to use, some are unesthetic, but these are trifles and constitute a small price to pay for the privilege of being able to regulate the number of one's offspring according to one's intelligent desires.

And the claim that contraceptives are harmful to a woman's or a man's health can be quickly dismissed. It isn't true for any of the modern contraceptives. But even if it were, the harm caused by contraceptives would be like a drop in the ocean compared to the damage caused by too many pregnancies and childbirths. Some contraceptive methods require some effort to use, and some might not look great, but these are minor inconveniences and a small price to pay for the ability to control the number of children according to one's informed choices.

The commonest argument now made against contraceptives is that they are not absolutely safe, that is, absolutely to be relied upon, that they will not prevent in absolutely every case. This is true; but there are three answers which render this objection invalid. First, many of the cases of failure are to be ascribed not to the contraceptives themselves, but [247]to their improper, careless and unintelligent use. The best methods in the world will fail if used improperly. Second, if the measures are efficient in 98 or 99 per cent, and fail in one or two per cent., then they are a blessing. Some women would be the happiest women in the world if they could render 98 per cent. of their conjugal relations unfruitful. Third, the imperfections of our contraceptive measures are due to the secrecy with which the entire subject must necessarily be surrounded. If the subject of birth control could be fully discussed in medical books there is no doubt that in a short time we would have measures that would be absolutely certain and would leave nothing to be desired. But even such as they are, the measures are better than none, and as said in the beginning of this chapter, it is the duty of every young woman to acquire as one of the items of her sex education the knowledge of how to avoid too frequent pregnancies. In fact, I consider this the most important item in a woman's sex education, and if she has learned nothing else she should learn this. For this information is absolutely necessary to her future health and happiness.

The most common argument against contraceptives today is that they aren't completely safe, meaning they can't be completely relied upon and might not prevent pregnancy in every case. This is true; however, there are three responses that make this objection less valid. First, many failures can be attributed not to the contraceptives themselves, but to their improper, careless, and ignorant use. Even the best methods will fail if used incorrectly. Second, if these methods are effective 98 or 99 percent of the time and fail in one or two percent of cases, then they are still a blessing. Some women would be incredibly happy if they could make 98 percent of their sexual encounters infertile. Third, the shortcomings of our contraceptive methods are due to the secrecy surrounding the entire topic. If birth control could be fully discussed in medical literature, there’s no doubt that we would soon have methods that are completely reliable and would meet all needs. But even in their current state, these methods are better than having none, and as mentioned at the start of this chapter, it is essential for every young woman to learn as part of her sex education how to prevent frequent pregnancies. In fact, I believe this is the most crucial part of a woman's sexual education, and if she learns nothing else, she should learn this. This knowledge is absolutely necessary for her future health and happiness.


A Few Everyday Cases

In my twenty years' work for the cause of rational [248]birth control I have come in contact with thousands and thousands of cases which demonstrate in the most convincing manner possible the tragic results of forced or undesired motherhood, and of the fear of forced or undesired motherhood.

In my twenty years of working for the cause of rational [248] birth control, I have encountered thousands of cases that clearly show the tragic consequences of unwanted or forced motherhood, as well as the fear surrounding unwanted or forced motherhood.

Some of the cases were in my own practice, some were related to me by brother physicians, some were described to me by the victims living in all parts of this vast country. Were I to collect and report all the cases that came to my notice during those twenty years, they would without exaggeration make a volume the size of the latest edition of the Standard Dictionary, printed in the same small type. Some of them are positively heartbreaking. They make you sick at the stupidity of the human race, at the stupidity and brutality of the lawgivers. But I do not wish to appeal to your emotions. I do not wish to take extreme and unique cases. I will therefore briefly relate a few everyday cases, which will demonstrate to you the beneficence of contraceptive knowledge and the tragedy and misery caused by the lack of such knowledge.

Some of the cases were from my own practice, some were shared with me by fellow doctors, and some were described to me by victims from all over this huge country. If I were to gather and report all the cases I encountered during those twenty years, they would easily fill a book as large as the latest edition of the Standard Dictionary, printed in the same tiny text. Some of them are truly heartbreaking. They make you feel sick at the foolishness of humanity and the ignorance and cruelty of lawmakers. However, I don’t want to play on your emotions. I don’t want to focus on extreme and unique cases. Instead, I will briefly share a few everyday examples that will show you the positive impact of contraceptive knowledge and the tragedy and suffering caused by its absence.

Case 1. This class of case is so common that I almost feel like apologizing for referring to it. She, whom I will call by the forbearing name of Mrs. Smith, had been married a little over nine years, and had given birth to five children. She was an [249]excellent mother, nursed them herself, took good care of them, and all the five were living and healthy. But in caring for them and for the household all alone, for they could not afford a servant or a nurse-girl, all her vitality had been sapped, all her originally superb energy had dwindled down to nothing; her nerves were worn to a frazzle and she became but a shadow of her former self. And the fear of another pregnancy became an obsession with her. She dreamed of it at night, and it poisoned her waking hours in the day. She felt that she simply could not go through another pregnancy, another childbirth, with its sleepless nights and its weary toilsome days. She asked her doctor who brought her children into the world to give her some preventive, but he laughed the matter off. "Just be careful," was all the advice she got from him. And when in spite of being careful, she, horror of horrors, became pregnant again, she gathered up courage, went to the same doctor, and asked him to perform an abortion on her. But he was a highly respectable physician, a Christian gentleman, and he became highly indignant at her impudence in coming to him and asking him to commit "murder." Her tears and pleadings were in vain. He remained adamant.

Case 1. This type of case is so common that I almost feel like apologizing for mentioning it. She, whom I will refer to as Mrs. Smith, had been married for just over nine years and had given birth to five children. She was an [249]excellent mother, nursed them herself, took great care of them, and all five were alive and healthy. But by taking care of them and the household all on her own, since they couldn't afford a maid or nanny, all her energy had been drained, and her once incredible vitality had faded away. Her nerves were frayed, and she had become just a shadow of her former self. The fear of another pregnancy became an obsession for her. She dreamed about it at night, and it poisoned her waking hours during the day. She felt that she couldn't possibly endure another pregnancy, another childbirth, with its sleepless nights and exhausting days. She asked her doctor, who helped bring her children into the world, for some form of contraception, but he brushed it off with a laugh. "Just be careful," was all the advice he gave her. And when, despite being careful, she faced the horror of becoming pregnant again, she mustered her courage, went back to the same doctor, and asked him to perform an abortion. But he was a highly respected physician, a Christian gentleman, and he became very indignant at her boldness in asking him to commit "murder." Her tears and pleas fell on deaf ears. He remained firm.

Whether he would have remained as adamant if instead of Mrs. Smith, who could only pay [250]twenty-five dollars for the abortion, the patient had been one of his society clientele, who could pay two hundred and fifty dollars, is a question which I will not answer in the affirmative or negative. I will leave it open. I will merely remark that in the question of abortion in certain specific cases the moral indignation of some physicians is in inverse proportion to the size of the fee expected. A doctor who will become terribly insulted when a poor woman who can only pay ten or fifteen dollars asks to be relieved of the fruit of her womb, will usually discover that the woman who can afford to pay one hundred dollars is badly in need of a curettement. Oh, no. He does not perform an abortion. He merely curets the uterus.

Whether he would have stayed just as firm if instead of Mrs. Smith, who could only pay [250] twenty-five dollars for the abortion, the patient had been one of his wealthy clients, who could pay two hundred and fifty dollars, is a question I won’t answer yes or no. I’ll leave it open. I’ll just point out that in the issue of abortion in certain specific cases, some doctors’ moral indignation seems to decrease in proportion to the fee they expect. A doctor who becomes extremely offended when a poor woman who can only pay ten or fifteen dollars asks to get rid of her pregnancy will often find that the woman who can pay one hundred dollars really needs a curettage. Oh, no. He doesn’t perform an abortion. He merely curets the uterus.

But to come back to Mrs. Smith. She went away from the indignant adamant doctor. But she was determined not to give birth to another child. She confided her trouble to a neighbor, who sent her to a midwife. The midwife was neither very expert, nor very clean. Mrs. Smith had to go to her two or three times. After bleeding for about ten days she developed blood poisoning, from which she died a few days later, at the early age of twenty-nine, leaving a disconsolate father, who in time to come will probably find consolation with another woman, and five motherless children, who will never find [251]consolation. One may find a substitute for a wife, there is no substitute for a mother.

But back to Mrs. Smith. She left the outraged, stubborn doctor. However, she was set on not having another child. She shared her struggles with a neighbor, who directed her to a midwife. The midwife wasn’t very skilled or particularly clean. Mrs. Smith had to visit her two or three times. After bleeding for about ten days, she developed blood poisoning and died a few days later at just twenty-nine, leaving behind a grieving father who will likely find solace with another woman in time, and five motherless children who will never find [251]consolation. You can find a replacement for a wife, but there’s no replacement for a mother.

And such tragedies are of daily occurrence. May the Lord have mercy on the souls of those who are responsible for them.

And these kinds of tragedies happen every day. May the Lord have mercy on the souls of those who are responsible for them.

Before I proceed further I wish to say that it is the terrible prevalence of the abortion evil, with its concomitant evils of infection, ill health, chronic invalidism and death, that more than any other single factor urges us in our birth control propaganda. And those who want to forbid the dissemination of any information about the prevention of conception are playing directly into the hands of the professional abortionists. They could not act any more zealously if they were in league with the latter and were paid by them. And having mentioned the subject of abortion, I wish to utter a note of warning. In our birth control propaganda, we must be very careful to keep the question of the prevention of conception and of abortion separate and apart. The stupid law puts the two in the same paragraph, some ignorant laymen and equally ignorant physicians treat the two as if they were the same thing, but we, in our speeches and our writings, must keep the two separate, we must show the people the essential difference between prevention and abortion, between refraining from creating life and destroying life [252]already created; we must show the viciousness of meting out the same punishment for two things which are fundamentally different, different not only in degree but in kind—and it is only by thus keeping the two things apart, by showing that we stand for one thing—prevention—and not for the other—abortion, that we can ever gain the general sympathy of the public and the co-operation of the legislators. I do not say that there are not many cases in which the induction of abortion is not only justifiable, but imperative; but that is a different question, and the two issues must not be confused. And we would and should resent any attempt on the part of either enemy or friend to so confuse them.

Before I go any further, I want to say that the horrific prevalence of abortion, along with its associated issues like infection, poor health, chronic illness, and death, is the main reason that drives our birth control campaign. Those who seek to block the sharing of any information on preventing pregnancy are directly supporting professional abortionists. They couldn't promote their agenda more enthusiastically even if they were working with them and were being paid for it. Now that I've brought up the topic of abortion, I want to issue a warning. In our birth control campaign, we need to be very cautious to keep the issues of preventing pregnancy and abortion separate. The misguided law combines the two in the same paragraph, and some misinformed laypeople and equally uninformed doctors treat them as if they are the same. However, in our speeches and writings, we must distinguish between the two. We need to highlight the critical difference between preventing conception and terminating a pregnancy, between not creating life and destroying life that has already been created; we must emphasize the unfairness of punishing two fundamentally different actions with the same consequences—different not only in degree but in nature. It is only by keeping these two issues distinct and showing that we advocate for prevention and not for abortion that we can earn the support of the public and the cooperation of lawmakers. I'm not saying there aren't many situations where inducing an abortion is not just acceptable but necessary; however, that is a separate matter, and we must not get the two confused. We should and would oppose any attempt, whether from enemies or allies, to blur these lines.

Case 2. Mr. A. and Miss B. are in love with each other. But they cannot get married, for his salary is too small. They might risk getting married, if the specter of an indefinite number of children did not stretch out its restraining hand. She comes from a good family, she was brought up, if not in the lap of luxury, in the lap of comfort and coziness, and it is the ambition of every good American to furnish his wife at least as good a home as her father gave her. Her father, by the way, died prematurely from overwork in trying to give all possible comforts and advantages to a bevy of six unmarried and marriageable daughters.

Case 2. Mr. A. and Miss B. love each other. But they can't get married because his salary is too low. They might consider getting married, if the worry of having an indefinite number of kids didn’t hold them back. She comes from a good family; she was raised, if not in luxury, then in comfort and security. It's the goal of every decent American to provide his wife with at least as nice a home as her father did. Speaking of her father, he passed away too young from overworking himself to give all possible comforts and opportunities to his six unmarried daughters.

[253]As I said, the fear of children kept them back. Each year the hope revived that in another year their union in matrimony would be consummated. But the years passed. Mr. A.'s hair became thin and grayish, Miss B began to look haggard and pinched—and still the marriage could not take place. Miss B was very religious and very proper, and would not do anything that was improper. A was not quite so proper; he paid occasional visits elsewhere, and as instruction in venereal prophylaxis was not included in his college course, he acquired a gonorrhea, which it took him about six months to get rid of. To shorten the story, A was thirty-nine and Miss B was thirty-five when the many times postponed marriage was consummated, but Cupid seemed to be busy elsewhere when the ceremony took place, and there is very little romance in their married life. The marriage has remained childless, as I told Mr. A it would be.

[253]As I mentioned, the fear of having children held them back. Each year brought renewed hope that their marriage would finally happen. But the years went by. Mr. A.'s hair became thin and graying, while Miss B started to look worn out and stressed—and still, the wedding didn't happen. Miss B was very religious and proper, refusing to do anything inappropriate. A wasn't quite as strict; he sometimes visited other places, and since sex education wasn’t covered in his college courses, he ended up with gonorrhea, which took him about six months to clear up. To cut to the chase, A was thirty-nine and Miss B was thirty-five by the time their long-delayed wedding finally occurred, but it felt like Cupid had moved on by then, as their married life has very little romance. The marriage has remained childless, just as I had told Mr. A it would be.

I consider this a ruined life—and all for the lack of a little knowledge.

I see this as a wasted life—all because of a bit of knowledge that was missing.

If the anti-preventionists, those who are opposed to any information about the prevention of conception, were not so hopelessly stupid, they would see that from their own point of view it would be better if such information were legally obtainable. For it would be instrumental in causing more marriages [254]which otherwise remain unconsummated, and by favoring early marriages, it would be instrumental in curtailing the demand for prostitution, in diminishing venereal disease. And as is well known, venereal disease is one of the great factors in race suicide.

If the anti-preventionists, those who oppose any information about how to prevent conception, weren’t so hopelessly clueless, they would realize that from their perspective, it would actually be better if such information were legally available. It would help lead to more marriages [254] that would otherwise remain unconsummated, and by promoting early marriages, it would help reduce the demand for prostitution and lower the rates of sexually transmitted diseases. And as we all know, sexually transmitted diseases are a significant factor in the issue of race suicide.

Case 3. A young woman was married to a man who besides being a brutal drunkard was subject to periodic fits of insanity. Every year or two he would be taken to the lunatic asylum for a few weeks or months, and then discharged. And every time on his discharge he would celebrate his liberty by impregnating his wife. She hated and loathed him, but could not protect herself against his "embraces." And she had to see herself giving birth to one abnormal child after another. She begged her doctor to give her some means of prevention, but that boob claimed ignorance, and the illegality of the thing. The woman finally committed suicide, but not before she had given birth to six abnormal children, who will probably grow up drunkards, criminals or insane.

Case 3. A young woman was married to a man who, besides being a violent drunk, had episodes of severe mental instability. Every year or so, he would be admitted to a mental hospital for a few weeks or months, and then released. Each time he got out, he would celebrate his freedom by getting his wife pregnant. She hated and despised him but couldn’t protect herself from his “embraces.” She had to endure giving birth to one abnormal child after another. She pleaded with her doctor for some kind of birth control, but that idiot claimed he didn’t know anything about it and said it was illegal. The woman eventually took her own life, but not before she had given birth to six abnormal children, who will likely grow up to be drunks, criminals, or mentally ill.

And because we object to such kind of breeding, we are accused of being enemies of the human race, of advocating race suicide, of violating the laws of God and man. Oh, for a mighty Sampson to strike the imbeciles with the jaw of an ass, for a mental [255]Hercules to loosen the fontanelles of their petrified skulls and put some sense into them!

And because we disagree with this kind of breeding, we're called enemies of humanity, accused of supporting race suicide, and charged with breaking the laws of God and man. Oh, for a powerful Samson to hit the fools with the jawbone of an ass, for a smart Hercules to crack open their hardened heads and put some common sense in them!

Case 4. This observation concerns a couple both of whom had a very bad heredity. The blood of each was badly tainted. The doctor who had treated the husband cautioned them and told them that they had no right to have children. But here the tables were turned. The doctor wanted to give them the means for prevention, but the husband and wife, pious Roman Catholics, would not go against their religion and God (as if God wanted a world full of imbeciles), and refused to employ any precautions. They have had four children so far. One of them seems fairly normal, except that he is silly, in which respect he is merely like his parents; two are deaf and blind in one eye; the fourth is a cretin, practically an idiot.

Case 4. This observation involves a couple both of whom had very poor genetic backgrounds. Each of their bloodlines was severely compromised. The doctor who treated the husband warned them that they shouldn't have children. But in this case, the situation reversed. The doctor wanted to provide them with ways to prevent conception, but the husband and wife, devout Roman Catholics, refused to go against their faith and God (as if God wanted a world full of fools) and declined to take any precautions. They have had four children so far. One of them seems relatively normal, except that he is a bit silly, similar to his parents; two are deaf and blind in one eye; the fourth is severely mentally challenged, practically an idiot.

This case brings us face to face with another phase of the problem. What should we do when the parents, stupid and ignorant, refuse to stop breeding worthless material? Eugenic agitation, education, will bring about such a strong public opinion that none but idiots, who will be vasectomized or segregated, will dare to bring into the world children that are physically and mentally handicapped.

This case confronts us with another aspect of the issue. What should we do when parents, lacking understanding and knowledge, refuse to stop having children who could be considered unfit? Efforts in eugenics and education will create such a strong public opinion that only those lacking common sense—who will be either sterilized or separated—will feel brave enough to bring children into the world who are physically or mentally challenged.

Case 5. This couple had been married eight years, and had five children And the wife said she could [256]not stand it any more. Another child—no, she preferred death. They practiced coitus interruptus for a while, with mutual disgust, but when the wife was caught again, she said: "No more!" And she would not let her husband come near her. He could do what he pleased—she did not care. After a few months he began to go elsewhere—contracted syphilis, had to give up his position, the home was broken up, the wife went out to work, the children are scattered—in short, a home, which we are told is the foundation of our society, is broken up, and there is misery and wretchedness all around—and all for the lack of a little timely information.

Case 5. This couple had been married for eight years and had five children. The wife said she could [256] not take it anymore. Another child? No, she would rather die. They tried the withdrawal method for a while, but both felt disgusted by it. When she found out she was pregnant again, she said, "No more!" and refused to let her husband come near her. He could do what he wanted—she didn’t care. A few months later, he started going elsewhere, contracted syphilis, lost his job, and the family fell apart. The wife had to go to work, the children became scattered—in short, the home, which we are told is the foundation of our society, was destroyed, and there was misery and suffering all around—all for the lack of a little timely information.

Case 6. Mr. A and Miss B, twenty-eight and twenty-five years old respectively, have known one another for several years, and in spite of their occupation, which is supposed to make people blasé and cynical—he being a reporter and she a special story writer—are quite in love with each other. But their occupation and income are such that they cannot possibly afford to have and to bring up any children. They would love to get married, but the specter of a child—or rather of children—frightens them; and they remain single, to the great physical and mental injury of both. Accidentally they learn of appropriate means of regulating conception, get married and live happily—ever after, that is, until [257]they find themselves in a position to have children and to bring them up properly.

Case 6. Mr. A and Miss B, who are twenty-eight and twenty-five years old respectively, have known each other for several years. Despite their jobs that typically make people jaded and cynical—he's a reporter and she's a special feature writer—they're very much in love. However, their careers and income mean they can't afford to have and raise children. They want to get married, but the idea of having kids—actually, having multiple kids—terrifies them. As a result, they stay single, which harms them both physically and mentally. By chance, they discover effective ways to manage conception, get married, and live happily—at least until [257] they are in a position to have children and raise them properly.

In what way was society injured by this young couple acquiring contraceptive information?

In what way did society suffer because this young couple got information about contraception?

Case 7. Mr. C and Miss D are in love with each other. Unfortunately there is a strong hereditary taint of insanity on both sides. They are too high-minded to think of giving birth to children. They might be all right, but with insanity one does not take any chances. The thing is too terrible. They are condemned to a life of celibacy, which to them means a life of loneliness and misery. But like an angel from heaven comes to them the knowledge that one can live a love-life without any penalties attached to it. They get married and there is not a happier couple living.

Case 7. Mr. C and Miss D are in love with each other. Unfortunately, there’s a strong hereditary risk of insanity in both families. They’re too principled to consider having children. They might be okay, but when it comes to insanity, you can’t take any chances. It’s just too frightening. They’re destined for a life of celibacy, which for them means a life of loneliness and misery. But like an angel from heaven, they discover that it’s possible to have a loving relationship without any attached penalties. They get married, and there isn’t a happier couple around.

In what way has society been injured by this couple obtaining the contraceptive knowledge?

In what way has society been harmed by this couple gaining access to contraceptive knowledge?

Case 8. Mr. and Mrs. E have been married five years. They have a child four years old which shows unmistakable symptoms of epilepsy. They are horrified and an investigation discloses the fact that on her side in the preceding generation there was a good deal of epilepsy. Of course, the next child may not be epileptic. But then again it may. No parents with any sense of responsibility would take such chances. They decide to give up conjugal [258]relations. They keep it up for about thirteen or fourteen months; then one night an accident happens and very soon she finds herself pregnant. She declares she would rather die than to give birth to and have to take care of another epileptic child. She goes to a friendly physician who performs an abortion on her, and now the couple, not secure against future accidents, if they live together, decide to separate, and a tragedy is in sight. Fortunately they learn that conception can be prevented, and they continue to live together with benefit to themselves and harm to none.

Case 8. Mr. and Mrs. E have been married for five years. They have a four-year-old child who shows clear signs of epilepsy. They are terrified, and an investigation reveals that there was a significant history of epilepsy on her side in the previous generation. Of course, the next child might not be epileptic, but it could just as easily be the case. No responsible parents would take that risk. They decide to stop having sex [258]. They stick to this for about thirteen or fourteen months; then one night, an accident occurs, and soon she discovers she’s pregnant. She claims she would rather die than give birth to and care for another epileptic child. She consults a supportive doctor who performs an abortion, and now the couple, uncertain about future accidents if they continue living together, decide to separate, with tragedy looming. Fortunately, they find out that conception can be prevented, and they continue to live together, benefiting themselves without harming anyone.

In what way has society been injured by those people acquiring contraceptive information?

In what way has society been harmed by people getting access to contraceptive information?

Case 9. Mr. and Mrs. F have been married six years, and in these six years they have been blessed with four children. When he married he was getting twenty-two dollars a week, and that is exactly what he is getting now. In the meantime the cost of living has gone up twenty-five per cent., and there are four extra mouths to feed and four extra bodies to clothe. What difference this has made in that little household can better be imagined than stated. The little mother has aged sixteen years in those six years, and there is not a trace left of her girlishness and youthfulness. She loves her children, and does not want to get rid of them. She would not [259]take a million dollars for one of them, but she would not give five cents for another. But this is just what terrifies them; the possibility of another. And that possibility makes her irritable, makes her repel her husband's slightest advances, makes her move his bed to another room. She even tells him to satisfy his sexual desires elsewhere—and at the same time she is in fear and trembling that he might follow her advice. In short, a nice young home is about to be disrupted. Fortunately he reads somewhere an article on the subject of voluntary limitation of offspring, he begins to investigate; his physician pleads ignorance, but he is persistent, the physician investigates and obtains the desired information, which he shares with the patient. Harmony is restored and a happy home is re-established.

Case 9. Mr. and Mrs. F have been married for six years, and during that time, they've had four children. When he got married, he was earning twenty-two dollars a week, and that's still what he makes now. Meanwhile, the cost of living has increased by twenty-five percent, and now there are four more mouths to feed and four more bodies to clothe. The impact this has had on their little household can be better imagined than described. The young mother has aged sixteen years in those six years, and her youthful spirit has completely faded. She loves her children and doesn’t want to be without them; she wouldn’t trade one for a million dollars, yet she wouldn’t give a nickel for another. But this is what terrifies them—the possibility of having another child. That chance makes her irritable, pushes her to reject her husband's slightest advances, and causes her to move his bed to another room. She even tells him to satisfy his sexual urges elsewhere, while simultaneously fearing he might actually take her advice. In short, a once-happy home is on the brink of falling apart. Fortunately, he comes across an article on the topic of voluntary family limitation, starts to look into it; his doctor initially claims to know nothing, but he keeps pushing. The doctor investigates and finds the information he needs, which he shares with the patient. Harmony is restored, and a happy home is rebuilt.

Who was injured by the couple obtaining this information? And if nobody was injured, and everybody concerned was benefited, then why should the imparting of such information be considered a felony, punishable like the most atrocious of crimes?

Who was harmed by the couple getting this information? And if nobody was harmed, and all involved benefited, then why should sharing such information be treated like a serious crime, punishable as if it were one of the worst offenses?

Case 10. Mr. and Mrs. G have been married fifteen years. They were the parents of seven children, a large enough number for any family. Those seven children were born during the first eleven years of their married life. During the past five years, afraid of having any more, they first [260]abstained and then adopted a method which every modern sexologist knows is injurious to the nervous system of both the man and the woman. The man became a wreck; first neurasthenic, then impotent, cranky and grouchy, unable to get along in the office, constantly squabbling with his wife, who became just as bad a wreck. Their economic condition plus too many small children prevented the parents' separation. They remained living together, but they lived like a cat and a dog tied in a bag. Each silently prayed to be rid of the other. But a conversation overheard at a Turkish baths establishment put him on the right trail, and one year later we find the couple reconciled, both in good health and living a peaceful and fairly harmonious life. And those who have benefited most by the change are the children. In what way was society injured? And still if the doctor who gave Mr. G the information should have been caught and convicted, he would have been sent to prison for a year or two or five. Would he have deserved it? Here we have several plain, simple, unvarnished and unembellished cases which are typical of millions of similar cases and which prove conclusively that the law against imparting information about preventing conception is brutal, vicious, antisocial. Should not such a law be repealed, wiped off the statute books?

Case 10. Mr. and Mrs. G have been married for fifteen years. They have seven children, which is a big enough family. Those seven kids were born during the first eleven years of their marriage. In the last five years, worried about having more kids, they first [260]avoided it and then used a method that any modern sex expert knows is harmful to both partners' nervous systems. The man became a wreck; he started out with anxiety, then developed impotence, became irritable and grouchy, and struggled to get along at work, constantly arguing with his wife, who was also feeling just as miserable. Their financial situation and too many young children kept them from separating. They lived together, but it was like a cat and dog situation. Each secretly wished to be rid of the other. However, a conversation overheard at a Turkish bath led him in the right direction, and a year later, the couple was reconciled, both healthy and living a peaceful, fairly harmonious life. The children have benefited the most from this change. How was society harmed? Yet if the doctor who advised Mr. G had been caught and convicted, he could have faced one to five years in prison. Would that have been fair? Here we have several straightforward, honest cases that are typical of millions like them, which clearly demonstrate that the law against sharing information about preventing conception is harsh, cruel, and harmful to society. Shouldn't such a law be repealed and removed from the books?




FOOTNOTES:

[8] The Limitation of Offspring by the Prevention of Conception.

[8] The limitation of having kids by preventing conception.







Chapter Thirty-threeToC

ADVICE TO GIRLS APPROACHING THE THRESHOLD OF WOMANHOOD

The Irresistible Attraction of the Young Girl for the Male—The Unprotected Girl's Temptations—Some Men Who Will Pester the Young Girl—Risk of Venereal Infection—Danger of Impregnation—Use of Contraceptives by the Unmarried Woman May Not Always Be Relied Upon—Nature of Men who Seduce Girls—Exceptions—Illegitimate Motherhood—Difficulties in the Way of Illegitimate Mother Who Must Earn Her Living—The Child of the Foundling Asylum—Social Attitude Towards Illegitimacy Responsible for Abortion Evil—Dangers of Abortion—The Girl Who Has Lost Her Virginity.

The Irresistible Attraction of Young Girls to Men—The Temptations Facing Unprotected Girls—Some Men Who Will Harass Young Girls—Risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections—Danger of Unplanned Pregnancy—Reliability of Contraceptives for Unmarried Women Can Be Uncertain—Nature of Men Who Manipulate Girls—Exceptions—Single Motherhood—Challenges for Unwed Mothers Trying to Support Themselves—Children from Orphanages—Societal Attitudes Toward Illegitimacy Contributing to Abortion Issues—Risks of Abortion—The Girl Who Has Lost Her Virginity.


When a girl has passed the transition period of puberty and is entering upon young womanhood she exerts an irresistible attraction on the male sex. Whether she give the impression of a luscious red rose or of a delicate white lily, the charms of a beautiful, healthy, bright girl of seventeen or eighteen are undeniable and their appeal to the esthetic and sexual sense of every normal male is a normal, natural phenomenon. Whether it is a good thing or a bad thing that it is so, we will not stop to discuss here. But it is a natural phenomenon, a natural law, if you will, and one does not quarrel with natural phenomena. It is useless. But the [262]attraction which the girl exercises on the male is fraught with danger to her, and therefore a few words of advice and of warning are not out of place.

When a girl has gone through puberty and is stepping into young womanhood, she becomes irresistibly attractive to men. Whether she appears like a vibrant red rose or a delicate white lily, the allure of a beautiful, healthy, lively girl of seventeen or eighteen is undeniable, appealing to the aesthetic and sexual senses of every normal guy—it's a normal, natural occurrence. We won't debate whether this is a good or bad thing right now. However, it is a natural phenomenon, a natural law if you will, and you don’t argue with natural phenomena. It’s pointless. But the [262]attraction that a girl holds over men comes with risks for her, so a few words of advice and caution are definitely warranted.


Temptations. Fortunate are you, my young girl friend, if you come from a well-sheltered home, if you have been properly brought up, if you have a good and wise mother who knows how to take care of you. A mother's wise counsel given at the proper time, and her comradeship all the time, are more invulnerable than an armor of bronze and more secure than locked doors and barred windows. But if you have lost your mother at an early age, or if your mother is not of the right sort—it is no use hiding the fact that some mothers are not what they should be—if you have to shift for yourself, if you have to work in a shop, in an office, and particularly if you live alone and not with your parents, then temptations in the shape of men, young and old, will encounter you at every step; they will swarm about you like flies about a lump of sugar; they will stick to you like bees to a bunch of honeysuckle.

Temptations. You are lucky, my young girlfriend, if you come from a well-protected home, if you've been raised properly, and if you have a caring and wise mother who knows how to support you. A mother’s wise advice given at the right moments, along with her companionship at all times, is more protective than a suit of armor and more secure than locked doors and barred windows. But if you lost your mother at a young age, or if your mother isn't the right kind—it's important to admit that not all mothers are what they should be—if you have to fend for yourself, if you work in a store, in an office, and especially if you live alone and not with your parents, then temptations in the form of men, both young and old, will come your way at every turn; they'll surround you like flies around a piece of sugar; they'll cling to you like bees to a cluster of honeysuckle.

I do not want you to get the false idea that all men or most men are bad and mean, and are constantly on the lookout to ruin young girls. No. Most men are good and honorable and too conscientious to ruin a young life. But there are some [263]men, young and old, who are devoid of any conscience, who are so egotistic that their personal pleasure is their only guide of conduct. They will pester you. Some will lyingly claim that they are in love with you; some perhaps will sincerely believe that they are in love with you, mistaking a temporary passion for the sacred feeling of love. Some will even promise to marry you—some making the promise in sincerity, others with the deliberate intent to deceive. Still others will try to convince you that chastity is an old superstition, and that there is nothing wrong in sexual relations. In short, all ways and means will be employed by those men to induce you to enter into sexual relations with them.

I don't want you to get the wrong idea that all or most men are bad and mean, just waiting to ruin young girls. No. Most men are good and honorable and care too much to harm a young life. But there are some [263]men, both young and old, who lack any conscience, who are so self-centered that their own pleasure is their only guide. They will annoy you. Some will lie and say they’re in love with you; some might genuinely believe they’re in love with you, confusing a fleeting passion with true love. Some will even promise to marry you—some genuinely, others with the intent to deceive. Then there are those who will try to convince you that being chaste is an outdated belief, and that there’s nothing wrong with sexual relationships. In short, those men will use all kinds of tactics to get you to engage in sexual relations with them.

Don't you do it!

Don't you dare!

I am not preaching or sermonizing to you. I am not appealing to your religion or your morals. For if you have strong religious or moral ideas against illicit sexual relations, you are not in need of mine or anybody else's advice. But I assume that you are a more or less modern girl, with little or no religious bringing-up, or perhaps a radical girl, who has shaken off the shackles of religion and tradition. And to you I say: Don't you do it. Why? Because your welfare, your future happiness, is at stake. I am speaking from the point of view of your own good, and from that point of view I say: [264]Resist all attempts which men make exclusively for the purpose of satisfying their sexual desire, their lust.

I’m not trying to preach or give you a sermon. I’m not appealing to your beliefs or morals. If you have strong religious or moral views against casual sexual relationships, you don’t need my advice or anyone else's. But I assume you’re a fairly modern woman, with little or no religious upbringing, or maybe a radical who has broken free from the constraints of religion and tradition. And to you, I say: Don’t do it. Why? Because your well-being and future happiness are at stake. I’m speaking from the perspective of what’s best for you, and from that standpoint, I say: [264] Resist all attempts that men make solely to fulfill their sexual desires and lust.

You will ask again, why? For several reasons. First, you run the risk of venereal infection. The danger is not so great now as in former times, but is great enough. There are still plenty of men dishonest enough to indulge in sexual relations with a woman when they know they are not radically cured. The same man who will not get married unless he is sure that he is perfectly cured will not hesitate to subject a transient girl or woman to the risk of venereal infection. I know personally, because I have treated them; yes, I treated several intelligent and radical young men who infected young girls. And some of these girls in their turn, through ignorance and innocence, infected other men. So then, the first danger is the danger of venereal infection.

You might ask again, why? For several reasons. First, there's the risk of sexually transmitted infections. While it's not as big of a threat today as it was in the past, it's still significant. There are still plenty of men who are dishonest enough to have sexual relationships with women when they know they're not fully cured. The same guy who won't marry unless he's completely sure he's fine won't think twice about putting a casual girl or woman at risk for an infection. I know this firsthand because I’ve treated cases like this; I've treated several smart, progressive young men who ended up infecting young women. Some of these women, out of ignorance and innocence, went on to infect other men. So, the first risk is definitely the risk of sexually transmitted infections.

The second danger, still greater and more certain than the first, is the danger of impregnation. And pregnancy for a girl under our present moral and social-economic conditions is a terrible calamity. She is ostracized everywhere, and it means, if discovered, her social death. But you will say: "Aren't there any remedies that can be used to prevent conception? Aren't you yourself among [265]the world's chief birth-controllers; one of the world's chief advocates of the use of contraceptives?" Yes, my dear young lady, but I never made the claim that the contraceptives were absolutely infallible, I never claimed that they were 100 per cent. effective in 100 per cent. of all cases. But if they are effective 999 times or even 990 times in every 1000 they are a blessing. And thousands of families so consider them. And if a married woman gets caught once in a while, the misfortune is not so great. But if the accident happens to a non-married woman, the misfortune is great. Then again, you want to bear in mind that accidents are less likely to happen to married than to non-married women. The married woman has no fear, needs no secrecy, and she can go about the method of preparation carefully, with deliberation. The unmarried girl, as a rule, has not the proper conveniences, more or less secrecy must be maintained, hurry is not infrequently necessary, and that is why accidents are more apt to occur in spite of the use of contraceptives. So then, the second danger, even more sinister than the first, is the danger of pregnancy. "But if a misfortune happens, can I not have an abortion produced?" No, not always. Physicians willing to induce an abortion are not found on every corner. But this is not the principal point. What [266]I have to say on the subject, I will say later on in this chapter.

The second danger, even greater and more real than the first, is the risk of pregnancy. For a girl today, with our current moral and socio-economic conditions, this is a terrible disaster. She gets shunned everywhere, and if it's discovered, it means her social death. But you might ask: "Aren't there ways to prevent conception? Aren't you one of the world's major advocates for contraception?" Yes, my dear young lady, but I never claimed that contraceptives are completely foolproof; I never claimed they are 100 percent effective in 100 percent of all cases. But if they're effective 999 times or even 990 times out of every 1000, they are a blessing. Thousands of families think so too. If a married woman gets caught once in a while, it’s not as big of a deal. But if this happens to an unmarried woman, it's a big problem. Also, you should remember that accidents happen less often to married women than to unmarried ones. The married woman has no fear, doesn't need to hide anything, and can approach preparation carefully and deliberately. The unmarried girl, usually, doesn't have the right resources, has to keep things more secretive, often needs to rush, and that's why accidents are more likely to happen despite using contraceptives. So, the second danger, even more menacing than the first, is the risk of pregnancy. "But if something goes wrong, can't I just get an abortion?" No, not always. Doctors willing to perform abortions aren’t easily found. But that's not the main point. What [266] I need to say about this, I will cover later in this chapter.

Then it is well for you to bear in mind that those very men who use their utmost efforts, who strain every fibre and every nerve to get you, will despise you and detest you as soon as they have succeeded in making you yield to their wishes. This is one of the worst blots on the male man's character, a blot from which the female character is entirely free. And some men—fortunately their number is not very large—are such moral skunks that they take morbid pleasure in boasting publicly of their sexual conquests, and unscrupulously peddle about the name of the girl whom, by cunning false promises or other means, they succeeded in seducing. And of course such a girl finds it difficult or impossible to get married, and must end her days in solitude, without the hope of a home of her own.

Then it's important for you to remember that those very men who put in all their effort, who push themselves to the limit to get you, will look down on you and hate you as soon as they succeed in making you give in to what they want. This is one of the worst flaws in a man's character, a flaw that women are completely free from. And some men—thankfully, they are not very many—are such moral scoundrels that they take twisted pleasure in bragging publicly about their sexual conquests and shamelessly spread the name of the girl they tricked into sleeping with them through deceptive promises or other means. And of course, such a girl finds it hard or even impossible to get married and must spend her life alone, without the hope of having a home of her own.

For the above reasons I advise you earnestly and sincerely not to yield to the solicitations of thoughtless or unscrupulous men, who think of nothing but their coarse sensual pleasures. It is advice dictated by common sense, by your own deeper interest, aside from any religious or moral considerations.

For these reasons, I honestly and sincerely advise you not to give in to the pleas of reckless or unscrupulous individuals, who only care about their crude physical pleasures. This advice is based on common sense and your own deeper interests, beyond any religious or moral concerns.

The above advice, or call it sermon if you will, is meant principally for young girls, girls between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five. If a girl has [267]reached the age of twenty-eight or thirty and is willing to enter upon illicit sexual relations with her eyes open, with a full knowledge of the possible consequences, then it is her affair, and nobody shall say her nay. Nobody has a right to interfere.

The advice above, or you could call it a sermon, is mainly for young women, specifically those between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five. If a woman has [267] reached the age of twenty-eight or thirty and chooses to engage in sexual relationships knowing the potential consequences, then that’s her choice, and no one has the right to judge her. No one should interfere.

Nor should my advice be understood as directed to cases where there is sincere reciprocal affection and a mutual understanding. This is an entirely different matter, and has nothing to do with cases where the man is the pursuer or seducer and the woman an unwilling or reluctant victim.

Nor should my advice be seen as aimed at situations where there is genuine mutual affection and understanding. That's a completely different issue, and it doesn't relate to cases where the man is the pursuer or seducer and the woman is an unwilling or reluctant victim.

But whatever the relations between the man and the girl may be, whether she yielded in a fit of passion, or was seduced by false promises, by "moral" suasion, by hypnotic influence or by the vulgar method of being made drunk, what is she to do if she finds herself, to her horror, in a pregnant condition? There are two ways open to her: either let the pregnancy go to term or to have an abortion brought on.

But no matter what the relationship is between the man and the girl, whether she gave in during a moment of passion, was tricked by false promises, manipulated through emotional pressure, influenced through hypnosis, or even got drunk, what is she supposed to do if she discovers, to her dismay, that she's pregnant? She has two options: either let the pregnancy continue to full term or have an abortion.

If she lets the pregnancy go to term she has the alternative of bringing up the child herself openly or of placing it secretly in a foundling asylum. In the first case, the necessity of publicly acknowledging illegitimate motherhood requires so much moral courage that not one woman in a thousand is equal to it. It is not moral courage alone that is required; [268]the social ostracism could be borne with stoicism and even with equanimity, if with it were not frequently associated the fear or the real danger of starvation. For under our present system the illegitimate mother finds many avenues of activity closed to her. A school teacher would lose her position instantly, and so would a woman in any public position. It is feared that her example might have a contaminating influence on the children or on her fellow workers. Nor could she be a social worker—I know of more than one woman who lost her position with social or philanthropic institutions as soon as it was discovered that she did not live up strictly to the conventional code of sex morality. Nor could she be a private governess.

If she decides to carry the pregnancy to term, she has the option of either raising the child herself openly or placing it discreetly in a foundling home. In the first scenario, the need to publicly acknowledge being an unwed mother requires a level of moral courage that very few women possess. It’s not just moral courage that’s needed; [268]the social ostracism could be handled with resilience and even calm, if it weren’t often paired with the fear or actual risk of starvation. Under our current system, an unwed mother finds many opportunities closed to her. A school teacher would lose her job immediately, and so would a woman in any public role. There are concerns that her situation could negatively influence the children or her colleagues. She couldn’t work as a social worker—I know of more than one woman who lost her job in social or charitable organizations as soon as it was found out that she didn’t adhere strictly to the conventional standards of sexual morality. She also couldn’t be a private tutor.

It is thus seen that to acknowledge one's self an illegitimate mother requires so much courage, so much sacrifice, that very, very few mothers are now found that are equal to the task. Especially so when it is taken into consideration that the humiliations and indignities to which the child is subjected and the later reproaches of the child itself make the mother's life a veritable hell. So this alternative is generally out of the question.

It’s clear that admitting to being an unwed mother takes a lot of courage and sacrifice, so very few mothers are willing to take that on. This is especially true when you think about the humiliations and insults the child faces, along with the later complaints from the child themselves, which make the mother’s life incredibly difficult. As a result, this option is usually not considered.

To give the child to a foundling asylum or to a "baby farm" means generally to condemn it to a slow death—and not such a slow one, either. For [269]as statistics show about ninety to ninety-five per cent. of all babies in those institutions die within a few months. And the very few who survive and grow up have not a happy life. Life is hard enough for anybody; for children who come into the world handicapped by the disgrace of illegitimacy, life is torture indeed. It is with a breaking heart generally and because there is no other way out of the dilemma that a mother puts her baby away in a foundling asylum. She hopes and prays for its speedy death.

To send a child to a foundling home or a "baby farm" typically means condemning it to a slow death—and not even that slow. For [269] statistics show that about ninety to ninety-five percent of all babies in these institutions die within a few months. And the very few who do survive and grow up don’t have a happy life. Life is tough enough for anyone; for children born with the stigma of illegitimacy, life is pure torture. Usually, with a heavy heart and because there’s no other option, a mother places her baby in a foundling home. She hopes and prays for its quick demise.

Taking into consideration the pitifully unhappy lot of the illegitimate mother and illegitimate child, it is no wonder that every unmarried woman, as soon as she finds herself pregnant, is frantically determined to get rid of the child in the womb as soon as possible. And abortion thrives in every civilized country. Thousands and thousands of doctors and semi-doctors and midwives are making a rich living in this country from practicing abortion. The greater the disgrace with which illegitimacy is considered in a country, the stricter the prohibition against the use of measures for the prevention of conception, the greater the number of abortions in that country. But abortion is not a trifle, to be undertaken with a light heart. It is true that if performed by a thoroughly competent physician, [270]with all aseptic precautions, it is practically free from danger. But when performed by a careless physician or an ignorant midwife, trouble is apt to happen. Blood poisoning may set in, and the patient may be very sick for a time, and may on recovery from the acute illness remain a chronic invalid for life. And occasionally the patient dies. Whether or not abortion is justifiable under special circumstances is a separate question, which I have discussed in another place. But leaving aside the ethics of the question, if you have determined to have an abortion produced, be sure to go to a conscientious physician, and avoid the quacks and midwives. An unexpected and undesired pregnancy is punishment enough and there is no reason why you should be further punished by becoming a chronic invalid or by paying with your life. There is no sense in it. Nobody will profit by your invalidism or your death.

Considering the incredibly tough situation of both the unwed mother and her child, it’s no surprise that every unmarried woman who finds herself pregnant is desperately trying to terminate the pregnancy as quickly as possible. Abortion is common in every developed country. Numerous doctors, mid-level practitioners, and midwives are making a good living in this country from performing abortions. The greater the stigma attached to illegitimacy in a society, and the stricter the rules against contraception, the higher the rate of abortions in that country. However, abortion isn’t something to be taken lightly. While it’s true that if done by a fully qualified physician using proper sterile techniques, it’s generally safe, complications can arise if performed by an untrained doctor or a careless midwife. There’s a risk of blood poisoning, which can result in severe illness, potentially leaving the patient with long-term health issues. In some cases, it can even be fatal. Whether abortion is justifiable in certain situations is a different issue that I’ve already explored elsewhere. But putting aside the moral aspects, if you’ve decided to go ahead with an abortion, make sure you see a qualified doctor and steer clear of frauds and untrained midwives. An unwanted pregnancy is hardship enough without adding the risk of becoming permanently ill or losing your life. It doesn’t make sense. No one benefits from your suffering or death.

I do not wish to leave this topic without re-emphasizing the fact that abortion is not a trifle, to be undertaken or even to be spoken of lightly. Too many women, not only in the radical ranks, but in the conservative ranks as well, are in the habit of considering abortion as a joke, a trifling annoyance, something like a cold in the head, which, while disagreeable, is sure to pass away in a day or two. They know Mrs. A and Mrs. B and perhaps Miss C [271]who had abortions produced on them and in two or three days they were as good as ever. Yes. But they do not know Miss D who is resting in her grave, nor do they know why Miss E and Mrs. F are invalids for life. The women who get over their abortion experiences easily are apt to talk of their good luck; the women who have become chronic invalids or who are resting in their graves as a result of an abortion are not apt to talk of the matter.

I don’t want to leave this topic without stressing again that abortion is not something to take lightly or discuss casually. Too many women, both in radical and conservative circles, treat abortion as if it’s a joke or just a minor inconvenience, like having a cold that will pass in a couple of days. They know Mrs. A and Mrs. B and maybe Miss C [271] who had abortions and were back to normal in a few days. Yes. But they don't know Miss D, who is resting in her grave, nor do they know why Miss E and Mrs. F are lifelong invalids. The women who recover easily from their abortions tend to talk about their good luck; the ones who become chronic invalids or who are resting in their graves due to an abortion usually don't discuss it.

And therefore, once more, remember, an abortion is no trifling matter.

And so, once again, remember, an abortion is not something to take lightly.

One other piece of advice and I am through. Some men of a low moral and mental caliber are under the influence of the pernicious idea that if a girl has lost her virginity—no matter under what circumstances—she no longer amounts to much and is free prey for everybody who may want her. And, like beasts of prey, these wretched specimens of humanity pester such a girl with much more impudence, more brazenness than they dare to employ in the case of a girl who is still considered a virgin. And, what is more, the girls themselves become poisoned with this pernicious idea and dare not offer the same resistance that the virgin does. And they often yield with resignation, though against their will, and though they may experience a feeling of disgust against the man.

One last piece of advice and I’m done. Some men with low morals and mindset fall for the harmful idea that if a girl has lost her virginity—regardless of how it happened—she’s seen as less valuable and is fair game for anyone who wants her. Like predators, these miserable examples of humanity are much bolder and more brazen in approaching a girl who’s lost her virginity than they would be with a girl who’s still viewed as a virgin. What’s worse, the girls themselves start to absorb this toxic idea and don’t feel they can put up the same fight as a virgin might. They often give in with resignation, even if they don’t want to, and despite feeling disgusted by the guy.

[272]Now again, don't you do it. Do not nurse the medieval idea that because you are not a virgin in the physical sense, you are "ruined," "no good," and an outcast. You are nothing of the kind. If through some cause or other you are no longer in possession of an intact hymen, it is your affair or misfortune, and nobody else's. Do not on that account cast your eyes down and avoid meeting people. Carry your head high, do not fear to meet people, and treat with contempt the jeers of the stupid and ignorant. A person's entire character does not depend upon the presence or absence of the hymen, and one misstep should not ruin a person's whole life. A boy is not "ruined," is not an outcast, because he has had sexual relations before marriage, and while the boy's and girl's cases are not exactly identical, still the poor girl should not be made to expiate one error all her life long.

[272]Now again, don't you do it. Don't hold onto that outdated idea that just because you’re not a virgin in the physical sense, you’re "ruined," "no good," or an outcast. You are none of those things. If for some reason you're no longer a virgin, that's your business, and no one else's. So don’t lower your gaze or shy away from meeting people. Hold your head high, don’t be afraid to face others, and dismiss the mockery of the ignorant. A person's worth isn't determined by whether or not they have a hymen, and one mistake doesn’t have to define the rest of their life. A boy isn’t "ruined" or an outcast just because he’s had sex before marriage, and while boys and girls may not face identical situations, the girl shouldn’t have to carry the burden of one mistake for the rest of her life.

It isn't fair.

That's not fair.







Chapter Thirty-fourToC

ADVICE TO PARENTS OF UNFORTUNATE GIRLS

Attitude of Parents Towards Unfortunate Girl—The Case of Edith and What Her Father Did—The Pitiful Cases of Mary B. and Bridget C.

Attitude of Parents Towards Unfortunate Girl—The Case of Edith and What Her Father Did—The Sad Cases of Mary B. and Bridget C.


Suppose you are the parents of a girl to whom a misfortune has happened. I admit it is a misfortune, a catastrophe. Probably the greatest catastrophe that, under our present social system, can happen to an unmarried young woman. What are you going to do? Are you going to disgrace her—incidentally disgracing yourselves—are you going to kick her out of the house, condemning her to a suicide's grave, or to a life that is often worse than death? Or are you going to stand by her in her dark hours, to shield her, to surround her with a wall of protection against a cruel and wantonly inquisitive world, and thus earn her eternal gratitude, and put her on the path of self-improvement and useful social work? Which shall it be? But before you decide, kindly bear in mind that your girl is not entirely to blame; that some of the blame [274]lies with you. If she had been properly brought up, this would not have happened. I know such a thing could never have happened in my household. But I know how I would have acted if such a thing had happened. And I will tell you how one father and mother did act under the circumstances.

Suppose you are the parents of a girl who has experienced a misfortune. I admit it's a misfortune, a disaster. Probably the worst disaster that can happen to an unmarried young woman in our current society. What are you going to do? Are you going to shame her—while shaming yourselves too—are you going to kick her out of the house, condemning her to a fate worse than death? Or will you stand by her during her toughest moments, protect her, and create a barrier against a cruel and overly curious world, thus earning her lifelong gratitude and putting her on a path toward self-improvement and meaningful contributions to society? Which will it be? But before you decide, please remember that your daughter isn’t entirely to blame; some of the responsibility [274] lies with you. If she had been properly raised, this wouldn’t have happened. I know such a thing could never have occurred in my home. But I know how I would have reacted if it had happened. And I will tell you how one father and mother did respond in that situation.

They were far from rich; just fairly comfortable; they had a well-paying store. Edith was their treasure, because she was so pretty and so full of life. Unfortunately, she was too pretty and too full of life. She was only seventeen, but was fully developed, and had many empty-headed young admirers, who showered upon her silly compliments and cloying sweets. She became frivolous and flirtatious and was beginning to do poorly in high school. She failed in her last year, and refused to take the year over again. Now, all the time being her own, and having nobody to give any account to, she began to go out a good deal, and more than ever indulged in flirtations. One night she stayed out later than usual, her parents were worried, and when she came home about two in the morning there was a quarrel, and the father, who was a strict, impulsive man, gave her a pretty good beating. After that she went out very little, kept to herself, became rather melancholy, lost her appetite, and did not sleep well. To all inquiries she answered that there [275]was nothing the matter with her, that she just felt a little indisposed. Four or five months thus passed.

They weren't wealthy; just doing fairly well; they owned a decent store. Edith was their pride and joy because she was so beautiful and full of energy. Unfortunately, she was too beautiful and too full of energy. At just seventeen, she was fully developed and attracted many shallow young admirers who showered her with silly compliments and sugary treats. She began to act frivolously and flirtatiously, which affected her performance in high school. She failed her senior year and refused to repeat it. With all her time to herself and no one to answer to, she started going out more frequently and indulged in flirtations even more. One night, she stayed out later than usual, leaving her parents worried. When she finally returned home around two in the morning, there was an argument, and her father, who was strict and impulsive, gave her a pretty good beating. After that incident, she went out much less, kept to herself, became quite sad, lost her appetite, and struggled to sleep. Whenever anyone asked, she claimed there [275]was nothing wrong, just that she felt a little unwell. Four or five months went by like this.

But finally the condition could no longer be concealed. The mother was the first one to discover it. When the fact dawned upon her consciousness that her beautiful, not quite eighteen-year-old Edith was pregnant she promptly fell in a faint and it took Edith and the maid quite some time to restore her to consciousness. She became distracted. She floundered about pitifully, not knowing what to do, what decision to reach. She tried to conceal the matter from the father, but he saw that there was something wrong and it didn't take him long to worm the truth out of her. As the mother on learning the tragic truth had taken refuge in a dead faint, so he took refuge in a Berserker rage. He fumed and stormed and was in danger of an apoplectic stroke. He wanted to strike the daughter, but the mother interfered. He then ordered Edith to get out of the house and never to cross his threshold again. Edith looked at him to see if he meant it; the mother tried to intercede; but he was inflexible, and demanded that she leave at once. Edith began to gather a few of her belongings, the tears silently rolling down her face.

But finally, the situation could no longer be hidden. The mother was the first to notice it. When she realized that her beautiful daughter, not quite eighteen, was pregnant, she fainted immediately, and it took Edith and the maid quite a while to bring her back to consciousness. She became frantic, helplessly unsure of what to do or what decision to make. She tried to hide the situation from the father, but he quickly sensed that something was off and soon coaxed the truth out of her. Just as the mother had fainted upon hearing the tragic news, the father erupted in a furious rage. He fumed and shouted, nearly having a stroke. He wanted to hit his daughter, but the mother intervened. He then ordered Edith to leave the house and never return. Edith looked at him to see if he was serious; the mother attempted to intervene, but he was unyielding and demanded she leave immediately. Edith began to gather a few of her things, tears silently streaming down her face.

And here a sudden change came over the father. Some men (and women) are crushed by small [276]misfortunes; real catastrophes awaken their finer qualities, which lay dormant within them and which might have remained dormant within them forever. In these few minutes he seems to have undergone a complete metamorphosis. He went up to Edith, took her in his arms, kissed her, told her to stay, to calm down and they would see what could be done. In a few days she was taken over to a physician who performed an abortion. She was a pretty sick girl for about six weeks, and at one time there was danger of blood poisoning setting in. But she recovered. And she was a different girl. She had shed her frivolity and lightheartedness like an old garment. She took her last year in high school over again, entered Barnard, from which she was graduated among the very first, and soon began to teach in that very high school in which she had been a pupil. One of the teachers fell in love with her and she fell in love with him. He asked her to marry him. She wanted no skeleton from the past coming down rattling its bones and marring their married life, and she told him of the unfortunate incident. A good test, by the way, to find out a man's real love and breadth of character. Fortunately the man's love was a true love, not merely passion, and he was truly broadminded, which is not a very common thing among school-teachers. Their married life is [277]an uncloudedly happy one. And the relation between the daughter and the parents is one of sincere love and deep mutual respect.

And then something suddenly changed in the father. Some people are brought down by small misfortunes; real disasters bring out their better qualities that were dormant inside them and might have stayed that way forever. In those few minutes, he seemed to undergo a complete transformation. He went up to Edith, hugged her, kissed her, told her to stay, to calm down, and they would figure things out. A few days later, she saw a doctor who performed an abortion. She was pretty sick for about six weeks, and at one point, there was a risk of blood poisoning. But she got better. And she was a different person. She let go of her frivolity and lightheartedness like old clothes. She repeated her last year of high school, enrolled at Barnard, graduated at the top of her class, and soon started teaching at the same high school where she had been a student. One of the teachers fell in love with her, and she fell in love with him. He proposed to her. She didn’t want any skeletons from the past to come back and ruin their married life, so she told him about the unfortunate incident. It was a good test, by the way, to see a man's true love and character. Fortunately, his love was genuine, not just passion, and he was truly open-minded, which isn’t very common among teachers. Their married life is a happily unclouded one. And the relationship between the daughter and her parents is filled with genuine love and deep mutual respect.

Isn't it better so?

Isn't this better?

Didn't Edith's parents act more decently, more kindly, more humanely, more wisely than the parents, say, of Mary B, who, when they found out her condition, put her out of the house, into which she was brought back two days later a corpse, fished out from the East River? Didn't Edith's father act more nobly, more wisely even from a purely selfish point of view than the father of Bridget C, who kicked his daughter out penniless into the street, where he had to see her afterwards powdered and painted soliciting men and boys? The mother died of a broken heart, and the father, unable to bear the constant, daily repeated disgrace, became an incorrigible drunkard.

Didn't Edith's parents behave more decently, more kindly, more humanely, and more wisely than the parents of Mary B, who, when they found out about her situation, threw her out of the house, only to have her brought back two days later as a corpse pulled from the East River? Didn't Edith's father act more nobly and wisely, even from a purely selfish perspective, than the father of Bridget C, who kicked his daughter out without a cent to her name into the street, where he later had to see her all made up and soliciting men and boys? The mother died from a broken heart, and the father, unable to handle the constant, daily disgrace, became an irredeemable drunk.

Fathers and mothers! So bring up your daughters, so guard them and protect them, that the misfortune of an illegitimate pregnancy may not befall them. But if the misfortune has befallen them, then stand by them! Do not desert them then in these dark hours, the darkest hours in a girl's life. Do not kick them—they are down enough. Stand by them, and they will become good women and you will have their eternal gratitude. If you do not [278]stand by them, you are worse than the beasts of the jungle and deserve their eternal curse. You are unworthy to be, or to be called, parents, for you are devoid of the least spark of that sacred feeling called Parental Love, a feeling which unfortunately in only too many parents is replaced by nothing but the most sordid, most brutal egotism.

Fathers and mothers! Raise your daughters with care, protect them so that they don’t end up with an unplanned pregnancy. But if they do find themselves in that situation, stand by them! Don’t abandon them during these dark times, the toughest moments in a girl’s life. Don’t push them down further—they’re already struggling. Support them, and they will grow into strong women, and you will earn their eternal gratitude. If you don’t stand by them, you are worse than animals in the wild and deserve their lasting scorn. You are unworthy to be called parents, as you lack even the tiniest spark of that sacred feeling known as Parental Love, a feeling that sadly, in far too many parents, is replaced by nothing but the most selfish, brutal egotism.







Chapter Thirty-fiveToC

SEXUAL RELATIONS DURING MENSTRUATION

Heightened Sexual Appetite of Many Women During Menstruation—Sexual Intercourse During Menstrual Period—When Intercourse May be Permitted—Injection Before Coitus During Menstruation—Fallacy of Ancient Idea of Injuriousness.

Heightened Sexual Desire of Many Women During Menstruation—Sex During Menstrual Period—When Sex May be Allowed—Injection Before Sex During Menstruation—Myth of Ancient Belief in Harmfulness.


This may seem to some a strange and superfluous question, a question which would never present itself. Still the laity would be surprised if it learned how frequently nowadays that question is presented to the physician who specializes in sex matters. Some husbands come to the physician complaining that the menses are the only period during which their wives demand sex relations, and ask if something cannot be done to cure them of what they consider an abnormal desire.

This might seem like a strange and unnecessary question to some, a question that would never come up. However, people would be surprised to know how often this question is asked these days by those who specialize in sexual health. Some husbands go to the doctor, complaining that their wives only want to have sex during their menstrual periods, and they ask if there's a way to fix what they see as an abnormal desire.

Biologically considered, the desire on the woman's part for sex relations during the menses should not seem strange or abnormal, for we must bear in mind that menstruation bears a certain analogy to the rut in animals. And animals permit intercourse at no time except during the rut.

Biologically speaking, a woman's desire for sexual relations during her period shouldn’t seem strange or abnormal. We need to remember that menstruation has a similarity to the mating season in animals. Animals only allow mating during this time.

[280]Recent investigations have disclosed to fact that the number of women whose sexual appetite is heightened during the time immediately preceding, during, and following the menses, is quite considerable. And there is also a smaller percentage of women who experience the desire at no other time except during the menses.

[280]Recent studies have revealed that a significant number of women feel a stronger sexual desire in the period just before, during, and after their menstrual cycle. There is also a smaller group of women who only experience this desire during their period.

Speaking generally, relations during the menses should be discouraged. There are several reasons for it. The first reason, which need not be gone into in detail, is an esthetic one. The second reason is that intercourse during menstruation may in some cases lead to congestion of the uterus and ovaries. Third, the menstrual discharge, which as we know does not consist of pure blood but is a mixture of blood, mucus, and degenerated lining membrane of the uterus, may give rise to a catarrh of the urethra in the man. Fourth, and this is a point to be borne in mind, any discharge that a woman may be suffering from is always aggravated during menstruation. For these reasons relations during the menses are undesirable.

Generally speaking, sexual activity during menstruation should be avoided. There are several reasons for this. First, there's an aesthetic consideration that doesn't need to be discussed in detail. Second, intercourse during this time may sometimes lead to swelling of the uterus and ovaries. Third, the menstrual flow isn't just pure blood; it's a combination of blood, mucus, and sloughed-off uterine lining, which can potentially cause a urethral infection in men. Finally, it's important to note that any discharge a woman might have tends to worsen during her period. For these reasons, sexual relations during menstruation are not advisable.

But where the woman has strong libido during that time and has no libido at any other time, relations may be indulged in during the last day or two of the menses. Any unpleasantness may be obviated and any discharge may be removed by the woman [281]taking a mild, warm, antiseptic injection before coitus. The ancient idea of the injuriousness of the relations during menstruation and the disastrous results likely to follow them have only a very slender foundation. They rest on no scientific basis and though it may be sad to state facts, there are many couples who do indulge in such relations as a regular thing and without any injury to either husband or wife.

But if a woman has a strong sex drive during that time and none at other times, they can have relations during the last day or two of her period. Any discomfort can be avoided, and any discharge can be managed by the woman [281] using a mild, warm, antiseptic injection before sex. The old belief that having relations during menstruation is harmful and could lead to negative consequences is mostly unfounded. There's no scientific basis for it, and while it might be tough to admit, there are many couples who regularly engage in such relations without harm to either partner.







Chapter Thirty-sixToC

SEXUAL INTERCOURSE DURING PREGNANCY

Complete Abstinence During-Pregnancy—Bad Results of Complete Abstinence—Intensity of Relations During First Four Months—Intercourse During Fifth, Sixth and Seventh Months—Intercourse During Eighth and Ninth Months—Abstinence After Birth of Child.

Complete Abstinence During Pregnancy—Negative Consequences of Complete Abstinence—Intensity of Relations During the First Four Months—Intercourse During the Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh Months—Intercourse During the Eighth and Ninth Months—Abstinence After the Child is Born.


The question whether sexual intercourse is permissible during pregnancy is often put to the physician. Some extremists and theorists demand complete abstinence during the entire duration of pregnancy. Such abstinence is not only not feasible, but is unnecessary and may prove a disrupting factor; it may create not only dissension, it may wreck the love-life of husband and wife. I know of cases where the wife, influenced by the wrong teachings about the necessity of complete abstinence during pregnancy, about the possible injury to the child from intercourse, persisted in keeping the husband away; and the result was that the husband began to go to other women, and he got in the habit to such an extent that he refused to give up entirely, even after the child was born. It cannot be expected from [283]a married man, who is used to more or less regular sexual relations, to abstain entirely for nine or ten months. Such a demand is unreasonable and uncalled for. All claims about the injurious effects of intercourse on the mother and child lack proof and foundation. During the first four months of pregnancy no change need be made in the usual sex relations. Their "intensity" should be moderated, their frequency need not. During the fifth, sixth and seventh months intercourse should be indulged in at rarer intervals—once in two or three weeks—the act should be performed without any violence or intensity, and the usual position should be reversed or changed to a lateral one. During the eighth and ninth months relations had best be given up altogether.

The question of whether sexual intercourse is allowed during pregnancy often comes up for doctors. Some extremists and theorists insist on complete abstinence for the entire pregnancy. This kind of abstinence is not only impractical but also unnecessary and can become a disruptive factor; it can lead to conflict and damage the relationship between husband and wife. I know of cases where wives, influenced by misleading beliefs about the need for total abstinence during pregnancy and the potential harm to the child from intercourse, kept their husbands away. As a result, the husbands started seeking intimacy with other women, and this behavior became a habit that continued even after the child was born. It’s unrealistic to expect a married man, accustomed to having regular sexual relations, to go without it for nine or ten months. Such a demand is unreasonable and unjustified. There is no evidence supporting claims about the harmful effects of intercourse on the mother and child. During the first four months of pregnancy, there’s no need to change usual sexual practices. The "intensity" can be reduced, but the frequency doesn’t have to. In the fifth, sixth, and seventh months, intercourse should happen less often—about once every two to three weeks—and should be done gently, avoiding any violence or intensity, with a change in position to a lateral one. In the eighth and ninth months, it’s best to stop relations altogether.

And this abstinence should last until about six weeks after the birth of the child. During this period the uterus undergoes what we call involution; that is, it goes back to the size and shape it had before pregnancy, and it is best not to disturb this process by sexual excitement, which causes engorgement and congestion.

And this period of abstinence should continue for about six weeks after the baby is born. During this time, the uterus goes through a process called involution; that is, it returns to the size and shape it was before pregnancy, and it’s best not to disrupt this process with sexual activity, which can lead to swelling and congestion.







Chapter Thirty-sevenToC

SEXUAL INTERCOURSE FOR PROPAGATION ONLY

Belief in Sexual Intercourse for Propagation Only—What Such Practice Would Lead to—Nature and the Sex-fanatics—Sexual Desire in Woman After Menopause—Sex Instinct of Sterile Men and Women—Sex Instinct Has Other High Purposes.

Belief in Sex for Reproduction Only—What This Practice Could Cause—Nature and the Sex Fanatics—Women’s Sexual Desire After Menopause—Sexual Instinct in Sterile Men and Women—Sexual Instinct Has Other Important Purposes.


Some people sincerely believe that the sexual instinct is for reproductive purposes only; they claim we should never indulge in sexual intercourse unless it be for the purpose of bringing a child into the world. The act performed without such aim in view is stigmatized by them as carnal lust, as a sin. Some even say that such an act is equivalent to an act of prostitution. To argue the question with such people would be a waste of time. It is not fair to impugn the good faith, the sincerity of your opponents, because I have convinced myself that the most insane, most bizarre notions may be held by otherwise sane people in perfect sincerity. But we cannot help questioning the reasoning faculties of people holding such beliefs.

Some people genuinely believe that the sexual instinct is only for reproduction; they argue that we should never engage in sexual intercourse unless it is meant to create a child. They label the act performed without that intention as mere carnal desire, as a sin. Some even claim that such an act is the same as prostitution. To debate this issue with those individuals would be pointless. It's not fair to challenge the good intentions or sincerity of your opponents, because I've realized that even the most irrational, most bizarre ideas can be held by otherwise rational people with complete sincerity. However, we can't help but question the reasoning abilities of those who hold such beliefs.

Let us see where the belief of "sex relations for [285]procreation only" would lead us to. In a normal healthy couple impregnation follows one connection. So if a couple wanted to limit themselves to three or four or six children, they would be entitled to have relations only three, four or six times in their lives. For it must be remembered that during pregnancy sexual relations would be prohibited, as during pregnancy no further impregnation can take place, and no intercourse must take place which has not for its purpose the conception of a new human being. If the people were believers in big families, and agreed to have twelve children—no anti-Malthusian would expect more than that—they would be entitled to twelve relations during their marital life. Assuming that not every act is followed by pregnancy, but that it takes on the average three or four times to bring about the desired result, we will have it that during the wife's childbearing period the couple may indulge in sex relations from once in three or four years to once or twice a year.

Let’s consider where the belief in "sex relations for [285]procreation only" would take us. In a typical, healthy couple, conception happens after one encounter. So if a couple wanted to limit themselves to three, four, or six children, they would only be allowed to have relations three, four, or six times in their lives. It's important to note that during pregnancy, sexual relations would be off-limits since no further conception can occur, and any intercourse must solely aim to conceive a new human being. If people believed in having large families and decided to have twelve children—no anti-Malthusian would expect more than that—they would only be entitled to twelve relations during their marriage. Assuming that not every encounter leads to pregnancy, and it typically takes three or four times to achieve the desired outcome, this means that during the wife's childbearing years, the couple might engage in sexual relations anywhere from once every three or four years to once or twice a year.

Can a sane person knowing anything about the sexual instinct make any such demands from married people living in the same house and perhaps occupying the same bed? It must be borne in mind that as soon as the wife has reached the menopause all relations must cease, because she can no longer become pregnant, and intercourse without a probable [286]or possible pregnancy is a sin. Also remember that no matter how beautiful, young and passionate the wife may be, if she has some little trouble which makes pregnancy impossible, sex relations must be absolutely abstained from. And of course if the husband or wife is sterile, all relations must be renounced forever, no matter how strong the libido may be in one or both.

Can a sane person who knows anything about sexual desire make such demands of married people living in the same house and maybe even sharing the same bed? It's important to remember that once a wife reaches menopause, all sexual relations must stop because she can no longer get pregnant, and having sex without the possibility of pregnancy is a sin. Also, keep in mind that no matter how beautiful, young, and passionate the wife is, if she has any issue that makes pregnancy impossible, all sexual relations must be strictly avoided. And of course, if either the husband or wife is sterile, all sexual relations must be given up forever, no matter how strong the desire may be in one or both.

It is strange that Nature did not act according to the formula of our sex fanatics; no pregnancy, no intercourse. If she had meant it to be that way, she would have abolished sexual desire in woman immediately after the menopause. Unfortunately this is not the case. For we know that the sexual libido in women after the menopause is often and for several years stronger than before. Why? Nor has Nature abolished the sexual instinct and the passionate desire for sex relations in all those men and women who are for some reason or other sterile, or otherwise so defective that no child can result from the union.

It’s odd that Nature didn’t follow the ideas of our sex-obsessed society; no pregnancy, no sex. If that were the plan, she would have eliminated sexual desire in women right after menopause. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. We know that the sexual drive in women after menopause is often stronger for several years than it was before. Why is that? Nature hasn’t removed the sexual instinct and the strong desire for sex in all those men and women who, for one reason or another, are unable to have children, or are otherwise so unfit that no child can come from their union.

As I stated at the beginning, it is a waste of time to argue the matter. Those who believe that sex relations are for racial purposes only, are welcome to their belief, and are welcome to live up to it. (How few of them do, though, honestly and consistently?) We must reiterate our opinion that the [287]sex instinct has other high purposes besides that of perpetuating the race, and sex relations may and should be indulged in as often as they are conducive to man's and woman's physical, mental and spiritual health. No iron-clad rules can be laid down as to the frequency. For some people three times a year may be sufficient, others may require relations three times a month (the best for the average) and still others may not be satisfied with less than three times a week. The human libido sexualis cannot be put into an iron mould, and you should pay no attention to religious fanatics who are ignorant of physiology and psychology and who can only blunder and bungle up things.

As I mentioned at the start, it’s pointless to argue about this. Those who think that sexual relationships are only for racial reasons are free to believe that and to live by it. (But honestly, how many do so consistently?) We must restate our view that the [287]sex instinct serves other important purposes beyond just keeping the race going, and sexual relationships should be embraced whenever they promote a person’s physical, mental, and spiritual well-being. There can't be strict rules about how often this should happen. For some people, three times a year might be enough, while others may need it three times a month (which is ideal for most), and still others might not be content with less than three times a week. Human libido sexualis can't be confined to rigid standards, and you shouldn’t listen to religious fanatics who lack understanding of physiology and psychology and who only create confusion.







Chapter Thirty-eightToC

VAGINISMUS

Vaginismus—Dyspareunia—Difference Between Vaginismus and Dyspareunia—Adherent Clitoris a Cause of Masturbation and Convulsions.

Vaginismus—Painful Intercourse—Difference Between Vaginismus and Painful Intercourse—Adherent Clitoris as a Cause of Masturbation and Spasms.


By the term vaginismus we understand a painful spasm or contraction of the vaginal orifice which makes intercourse very difficult, or impossible.

By the term vaginismus, we mean a painful spasm or contraction of the vaginal opening that makes intercourse very difficult or even impossible.

Certain cases of vaginismus, or rather false vaginismus, may be due to laceration or inflammation of the vaginal orifice, but in genuine cases of vaginismus no local disease can be found, because genuine vaginismus is of nervous origin.

Certain instances of vaginismus, or more accurately, false vaginismus, might be caused by tearing or inflammation of the vaginal opening. However, in true cases of vaginismus, no local disease is present because true vaginismus originates from nervous factors.

Dyspareunia means painful or difficult intercourse, from whatever cause. It differs from vaginismus in that the cause is generally a local one, that is, it may be inflammation, laceration as after a confinement, small size or atresia of the vagina, etc. When vaginismus is present, it is present in reference to all men, in fact the mere touch of the finger or an instrument may call forth a painful spasm; while dyspareunia may show itself with one man and be absent with another. The origin of the [289]word dyspareunia shows that this may be the case, for dyspareunos in Greek means badly mated.

Dyspareunia refers to painful or difficult intercourse, regardless of the cause. It differs from vaginismus in that the cause is usually local, such as inflammation, tearing from childbirth, small size or blockage of the vagina, etc. When vaginismus occurs, it happens in relation to all men; even a light touch from a finger or an instrument can trigger a painful spasm. In contrast, dyspareunia might occur with one partner but not with another. The origin of the [289] term dyspareunia supports this idea, as dyspareunos in Greek means poorly mated.

Dyspareunia must not be confused with true vaginismus. In dyspareunia the sexual act can be freely indulged in, only the act is painful or disagreeable. In vaginismus intercourse is impossible. In exceptional cases where the husband attempts to use brute force, the wife may faint away, she may get a convulsion or become wildly hysterical. If the husband insists in attempting relations, the wife may run away, or in exceptional cases even attempt suicide.

Dyspareunia should not be mistaken for true vaginismus. In dyspareunia, sexual activity can occur but is painful or unpleasant. In vaginismus, intercourse is impossible. In rare cases where the husband tries to force it, the wife might faint, have a seizure, or become extremely hysterical. If the husband persists in trying to have sex, the wife may flee or, in rare instances, even attempt suicide.


ADHERENT CLITORIS OR PHIMOSIS

The word phimosis means "muzzling," and it is a term applied to a constriction or narrowing of the foreskin, so that the glands of the clitoris cannot be freely uncovered. This condition may give rise to an accumulation of smegma or secretion which may cause inflammation, itching, and nervous irritation. This in its turn may be the cause of masturbation. It is claimed by some that an adherent clitoris may even be the cause of convulsions resembling epilepsy. In some cases it leads to an irritable bladder, inability to retain the urine, and nocturnal bed-wetting.

The term phimosis refers to "muzzling," and it describes a tightening or narrowing of the foreskin, preventing the glands of the clitoris from being easily exposed. This condition can lead to a buildup of smegma or discharge, which might cause inflammation, itching, and nervous irritation. In turn, this may lead to masturbation. Some people claim that a stuck clitoris could even trigger convulsions similar to epilepsy. In certain cases, it can result in an overactive bladder, trouble holding urine, and nighttime bed-wetting.

In all girls, big or little, that show a tendency [290]to masturbate or simply to handle the genitals, or that complain of itching, the clitoris should be examined and if adhesions are found they should be separated. This can easily be done under a local anesthetic.

In all girls, big or small, who show a tendency [290]to masturbate or simply touch their genitals, or who complain of itching, the clitoris should be checked, and if there are any adhesions, they should be separated. This can be done easily with a local anesthetic.







Chapter Thirty-nineToC

STERILITY

Definition of Sterility—Husband Should First be Examined—One-child Sterility—The Fertile Woman—Salpingitis as a Cause of Sterility—Leucorrhea and Sterility—Displacement of Uterus and Sterility—Closure of Neck of Womb and Sterility—Sterility and Constitutional Disease—Treatment of Sterility.

Definition of Sterility—The Husband Should Be Examined First—One-Child Sterility—The Fertile Woman—Salpingitis as a Cause of Sterility—Leucorrhea and Sterility—Uterine Displacement and Sterility—Closure of the Cervix and Sterility—Sterility and Chronic Illness—Treatment of Sterility.


Sterility or barrenness is a condition of inability to have children. In former years the opinion prevailed generally, whenever a couple was childless, that the fault was exclusively the woman's. It wasn't even thought that the man could be to blame. We now know that in at least fifty per cent. of cases of sterility, or childless marriages, the fault is not the woman's but the man's. It is therefore very unwise in conditions of sterility to subject the wife to treatment without first examining the husband. Nevertheless, this is still often the case, particularly among the lower classes or among the ignorant. There are cases where the woman goes from one doctor to another for years and is subjected to all kinds of treatment, when a simple examination of the husband would show that the fault lies with him.

Sterility or infertility is the condition of being unable to have children. In the past, it was commonly believed that if a couple was childless, it was solely the woman's fault. The idea that the man could be responsible was never even considered. Now we know that in at least fifty percent of cases of infertility or childless marriages, the issue lies with the man, not the woman. Therefore, it’s very unwise to put the wife through treatment for infertility without first checking the husband. Unfortunately, this is still often the case, especially among lower-income groups or those lacking knowledge. There are instances where the woman consults multiple doctors for years and undergoes various treatments, while a simple examination of the husband would reveal that the problem is with him.

[292]Some women have one child and are unable afterwards to give birth to any more. Such a condition is called one-child-sterility. It is generally due to an inflammation of the Fallopian tubes which closes up the openings of the tubes into the womb, so that no more ova can pass from the ovaries through the tubes into the womb. This inflammation may be the result of childbirth, for childbirth alone may set up an inflammation, or it may be due to an infection contracted from the husband.

[292]Some women have one child and then cannot have any more. This condition is called one-child sterility. It is usually caused by inflammation of the fallopian tubes, which blocks the openings of the tubes into the uterus, preventing more eggs from passing from the ovaries through the tubes into the uterus. This inflammation might result from childbirth, as giving birth can trigger inflammation, or it might come from an infection passed on by the husband.

In order to be fertile, that is, to be able to conceive and give birth to a living child, the woman's external and internal genital organs must be normal, her ovaries must produce healthy ova, and there must be no obstruction on the way, so that the ova and the spermatozoa can meet. The mucous membrane of the womb must also be healthy, so that when the impregnated ovum gets attached to the womb it may develop there without any trouble, and not become diseased or poorly nourished and cast off.

To be fertile, meaning able to conceive and give birth to a healthy child, a woman's external and internal reproductive organs must be normal, her ovaries must produce healthy eggs, and there must be no blockages preventing the eggs and sperm from meeting. The lining of the uterus also needs to be in good condition so that when the fertilized egg attaches to the uterus, it can grow there without complications, and not become unhealthy or poorly nourished, leading to it being expelled.

We must always remember that the woman's share in bringing forth children and perpetuating the race is much more important than the man's. When a man has discharged his spermatozoa his work is done—the woman's only commences.

We must always remember that a woman's role in giving birth and continuing the human race is far more significant than a man's. Once a man has ejaculated, his job is finished—it's only the beginning for the woman.

The conditions which cause sterility in women are many, but the most common cause is a salpingitis or [293]an inflammation of the Fallopian tubes, which may be caused by gonorrhea or any other inflammation. A severe leucorrhea may also be the cause of sterility, because the leucorrheal discharge may be fatal to the spermatozoa. Another cause is a severe bending or turning of the uterus either forwards or backwards. The opening of the neck of the womb, the os, may also be closed, or practically so, from ulceration, from strong applications, etc. In some cases sterility may be due to severe constitutional disease, when the person is very much run down and so anemic that menstruation stops. Unfortunately this is not always the case, for women even in the last stages of consumption may, and often do, become pregnant. Syphilis unfortunately does not cause sterility; it only causes miscarriages until controlled by treatment.

The reasons for female sterility are numerous, but the most common one is salpingitis, or inflammation of the Fallopian tubes, which can be caused by gonorrhea or other inflammatory conditions. Severe vaginal discharge can also lead to sterility, as it may harm sperm. Another factor is a significant bending or twisting of the uterus, either forward or backward. The cervix may also be nearly closed due to ulceration, strong treatments, etc. In some cases, sterility can result from serious health issues when a person is very weak and anemic to the point that menstruation stops. Unfortunately, this isn’t always true, as women in advanced stages of tuberculosis can and often do get pregnant. Sadly, syphilis doesn’t cause sterility; it only leads to miscarriages until treated.

The treatment of sterility can be successfully carried out only by a competent physician, particularly by one who is devoting himself specially to this kind of work. But I want once more to impress upon every woman who is sterile, and who wants to have a child, not to have herself treated or even examined until her husband has been subjected to an examination.

The treatment of infertility can only be effectively performed by a qualified doctor, especially one who specializes in this area. However, I want to emphasize once again to every woman who is infertile and wishes to have a child not to seek treatment or even an examination until her husband has undergone an evaluation.







Chapter FortyToC

THE HYMEN

Difference Between Chastity and Virginity—Worship of Intact Hymen—Sacrificing Hymen Sometimes Essential for Health of the Girl—Certificate from Physician who has Ruptured Hymen.

Difference Between Chastity and Virginity—Worship of Intact Hymen—Sometimes It's Necessary to Sacrifice the Hymen for the Health of the Girl—Certificate from Physician Who Has Ruptured the Hymen.


I have mentioned in a previous chapter that the absence of the hymen was no proof of unchastity, just as the presence of the hymen was no proof of perfect chastity. Chastity and virginity are not synonymous, and a girl may possess physical virginity, that is, an intact hymen, and still be morally unchaste. She may be in the habit of indulging in unnatural sexual practices. But the laity does not know these facts or does not want to know them, and the intact hymen is still worshipped like a fetish. This would be of little consequence, if it did not often result in unnecessary suffering to the female child or girl. Much disease and a good deal of sterility result from the fear of tampering with the hymen.

I mentioned in an earlier chapter that the absence of the hymen doesn't mean a lack of chastity, just as having a hymen doesn't guarantee complete chastity. Chastity and virginity aren't the same, and a girl can physically be a virgin, meaning she has an intact hymen, while still being morally unchaste. She might engage in unnatural sexual practices. However, most people either don't know these facts or choose to ignore them, and the intact hymen is still idolized like a fetish. This wouldn’t matter much if it didn’t often lead to unnecessary suffering for young girls. Many illnesses and instances of infertility come from the fear of interfering with the hymen.

When a boy gets some trouble with his genital organs, such as phimosis, or balanitis or whatever it may be, he is at once taken to a physician, who [295]institutes the necessary treatment. When a little girl complains of itching around the genitals or of some discharge, the mother will hesitate long before taking her to a doctor. She will be afraid he will do something to the hymen. And so she will temporize, using salves and washes, and the disease will in the meantime be making progress, that is, getting worse. When she does take her to a physician, and he says that in order to treat the case thoroughly the hymen has to be stretched or opened, the mother will withhold her consent, and the disease will be allowed to progress. I know of many such cases. This is wrong. When the health of the girl demands and her future child-bearing power is at stake, no hesitation should be felt in sacrificing the hymen.

When a boy has issues with his genital organs, like phimosis or balanitis, he’s quickly taken to a doctor, who [295]provides the needed treatment. However, when a girl complains of itching around her genitals or has any discharge, her mother is often reluctant to take her to a doctor. She worries that the doctor might do something to her hymen. So, she tries home remedies, using creams and washes, while the condition worsens. When she finally brings her daughter to a physician, and he informs her that treating the issue properly requires stretching or opening the hymen, the mother usually refuses to give her consent, allowing the problem to escalate. I know of many such situations. This is wrong. When a girl's health is at risk and her future ability to bear children is concerned, there should be no hesitation in prioritizing her health over the hymen.

Though in the future the fuss which is now made about the hymen, the excessive veneration in which it is held, will appear ridiculous, and though I consider it foolish and rather humiliating to the girl, nevertheless, now, when the average husband does lay so much stress on the presence of an unruptured hymen, a physician who in the course of an operation or treatment has occasion to cut or rupture the hymen, will do well to give the patient a certificate to that effect. In case any question regarding the girl's chastity comes up in the future, she can prove by the doctor's certificate that her loss of virginity [296]was not due to sexual relations. Of course the relations between husband and wife, or between prospective husband and wife, should be such that no "certificate" should be necessary; but reality differs from the ideal, and in some cases that we know the husband's suspicions were allayed by the doctor's oral or written statement.

Though in the future the fuss over the hymen and the excessive reverence it receives will seem ridiculous, and while I believe it to be foolish and somewhat demeaning to the girl, currently, when many husbands place so much importance on an unbroken hymen, a doctor who needs to cut or rupture the hymen during a procedure should provide the patient with a certificate stating this. If any questions about the girl’s chastity arise later, she can use the doctor’s certificate to prove that her loss of virginity [296] was not due to sexual activity. Ideally, the relationship between husband and wife, or between future spouses, should be such that no "certificate" is needed; however, reality often doesn't match the ideal, and in some known cases, a doctor's verbal or written confirmation has eased the husband's suspicions.

This is as good a place as any to emphasize, that if the bride has a very strong, tough and resistant hymen, the new husband should not use brute force in rupturing it. First, because the pain may be too excruciating and this may create in the wife an aversion to intercourse which may last for many months or years—in some cases forever. Second, a severe hemorrhage may result, which may require the aid of a physician to stop. Wherever a case of very resistant hymen is encountered, the husband should make several attempts; gradual and gentle dilatation, with the aid of a little vaseline and not forcible rupture should be the aim; the result will usually be satisfactory. In exceptional cases, a physician may have to be called in. The operation of cutting the hymen is a trifling one.

This is as good a place as any to emphasize that if the bride has a very strong, tough, and resistant hymen, the new husband should not use brute force to break it. First, because the pain could be extremely intense, which may lead to the wife developing an aversion to intercourse that could last for many months or even years—in some cases, forever. Second, a severe hemorrhage might occur, requiring a doctor’s help to stop it. Whenever a very resistant hymen is encountered, the husband should make several attempts; the goal should be gradual and gentle stretching, using a little vaseline instead of forcible rupture; the outcome will usually be satisfactory. In exceptional cases, a doctor may need to be involved. The procedure for cutting the hymen is minor.

It is also interesting to know that some wives have sex relations for months and years, and the hymen remains unruptured. Pregnancy may also result with an intact hymen.

It’s also interesting to know that some wives have sexual relations for months and years, and the hymen remains unbroken. Pregnancy can also occur with an intact hymen.







Chapter Forty-oneToC

IS THE ORGASM NECESSARY FOR IMPREGNATION?

Suppression of Orgasm by Woman to Prevent Impregnation—Bad Results of Suppression by the Woman—Orgasm: Relation of to Impregnation—A Hypothesis—A Fanciful Hypothesis—Why Passionate Women Frequently Fail to Become Mothers—Advice to Passionate Women who Desire to Conceive.

Suppression of Orgasm by Women to Prevent Pregnancy—Negative Effects of Suppression by Women—Orgasm: Its Relation to Pregnancy—A Theory—An Unconventional Theory—Why Passionate Women Often Have Difficulty Becoming Mothers—Advice for Passionate Women Who Want to Get Pregnant.


Among the laity the opinion is quite prevalent that in order for a woman to conceive she must experience an orgasm, she must have had a pleasurable voluptuous sensation during the act. If she has no orgasm, impregnation cannot take place. So sure are some women that this is so that when they want to avoid conception they repress any orgastic feeling; as they say, they don't let themselves go. Which, I will say, by the way, is one of the causes of female frigidity. If you don't habitually permit a certain feeling to develop, if you repeatedly repress it at the very beginning, at its first manifestation, it is apt to atrophy altogether, to become permanently suppressed, or the suppression develops into a nervous disorder.

Among the general public, it's a common belief that for a woman to get pregnant, she needs to have an orgasm; she must feel some pleasurable sensations during sex. If she doesn’t reach orgasm, she can't conceive. Some women are so convinced of this that when they want to prevent pregnancy, they hold back any feelings of pleasure; they say they don’t let themselves enjoy it. This, by the way, can contribute to issues like female frigidity. If you consistently avoid allowing a certain feeling to develop, if you keep suppressing it right from the start, it’s likely to fade away completely, become permanently repressed, or lead to a nervous disorder.

Among the medical profession no perfect [298]unanimity has been reached as to the rôle of the orgasm in impregnation. Some sexologists like Kisch and Vaerting believe it does play an important rôle; others, like Forel, believe it plays none. That the orgasm is not necessary for impregnation admits of no discussion. Women who suffer from frigidity in an extreme degree, women who never experienced an orgasm, women who repress their orgasm, women in sleep or under narcosis, women who have been raped, women who loathe their husbands, become pregnant frequently and readily. But does it play any rôle at all? Does it facilitate impregnation? Other things being equal, will intercourse accompanied by an orgasm be more likely to prove fruitful than one in which the orgasm was entirely absent? This question I am forced to answer in the affirmative. Because from the various investigations I have made it can hardly be subject to doubt that the uterus during an orgasm exerts a certain amount of suction; and that impregnation is more likely to follow when the spermatozoa are sucked up into the uterus than when left to make their own way by their own power of motion, stands to reason and goes without saying. In the former instance it takes less time for the spermatozoa to reach the ovum, and there is less chance for them to perish on the way—from malnutrition or from coming in [299]contact with secretions of an acid reaction. There is another point. I do not bring it forth as a proved fact or as a fact susceptible to proof. It is a mere hypothesis, but in my opinion it is a correct and plausible hypothesis. I believe that the strong spasmodic contractions that take place during the orgasm have an influence not only in accelerating the bursting of a Graafian follicle and the extrusion of an ovum, but they are instrumental in aiding the Fallopian tube to grasp the ovum and helping it along on the road towards the uterus. It is therefore not at all inconceivable that conception may take place during or within a very short time after an act which is accompanied by a proper orgasm. Many women claim to experience peculiar unmistakable sensations as soon as conception has taken place, and by calculating the day of probable delivery we know that they are right. Taking therefore all the various data into consideration we are fully justified in saying that while an orgasm or a voluptuous sensation during the act is not at all necessary to impregnation, it is in many cases a helpful factor.

Among medical professionals, there is no complete agreement on the role of orgasm in conception. Some sexologists, like Kisch and Vaerting, believe it plays an important role; others, like Forel, think it does not. There's no debate that orgasm is not necessary for conception. Women who experience extreme frigidity, women who have never had an orgasm, women who suppress their orgasms, women asleep or under anesthesia, women who have been raped, and women who dislike their husbands can become pregnant frequently and easily. But does it play any role at all? Does it help with conception? Given the same circumstances, is intercourse with orgasm more likely to result in pregnancy than intercourse without one? I must answer this in the affirmative. From my various investigations, it's clear that the uterus during orgasm creates a certain amount of suction; and it makes sense that conception is more likely to occur when sperm is pulled into the uterus rather than being left to swim there on its own. In the former case, it takes less time for sperm to reach the egg, and there’s a lower chance of them dying on the way—due to malnutrition or coming into [299]contact with acidic secretions. There’s another point. I’m not presenting it as a proven fact or something that can be proven. It’s a mere hypothesis, but I believe it’s correct and plausible. I think that the strong spasmodic contractions during orgasm can influence not only the rapid release of a Graafian follicle and the release of an egg but also help the Fallopian tube catch the egg and carry it toward the uterus. So, it’s not at all unthinkable that conception could happen during or shortly after an act that includes a proper orgasm. Many women report feeling distinct, unmistakable sensations right after conception occurs, and by calculating the date of probable delivery, we can confirm that they are right. Therefore, considering all the different information, we can confidently say that while an orgasm or pleasurable sensation during intercourse is not necessary for conception, it is often a helpful factor.

It is claimed by some that the offspring resulting from an orgastic act is apt to be healthier and better developed than offspring resulting from sexual intercourse in which the parties experience no orgasm. The reason given being that conception in the [300]first instance taking place quickly, the spermatozoa are better nourished and more vigorous. In my opinion this is merely a fanciful hypothesis which needn't be taken seriously.

It is said by some that children conceived from an orgasmic act tend to be healthier and better developed than those conceived from sexual intercourse where the parties do not reach orgasm. The reasoning is that in the [300]first scenario, conception happens quickly, so the sperm are better nourished and more vigorous. In my view, this is just a fanciful idea that isn't worth taking seriously.

It will be found rather frequently that women of strong passionate natures, with strong orgastic feelings, and normal in every way, fail to become mothers. A careful investigation of their menstrual discharge will show that it is not because they failed to conceive, but because the impregnated ovum is expelled each time; in other words, they have each month a miniature miscarriage. And these miscarriages, or rather abortions, are due to the spasmodic contractions of the uterus and its adnexae which accompany the orgasm. In such cases I have advised the woman to try to remain passive during the act, to repress the orgasm, and the results have in some instances shown the wisdom of my advice. After conception has taken place, after one period has been missed, the woman should abstain from intercourse altogether or at least for two or three months until the fetus is securely attached to, or ensconced in, the uterus.

It is often observed that women with strong emotions and healthy sexual feelings fail to become mothers. A close examination of their menstrual flow will reveal that it's not because they were unable to conceive, but because the fertilized egg is expelled each time; in other words, they experience a mini miscarriage each month. These miscarriages, or more accurately, abortions, happen due to the spasmodic contractions of the uterus and its surrounding tissues that occur with orgasm. In such cases, I have advised women to try to stay relaxed during sex, to hold back from climaxing, and sometimes this advice has proven to be beneficial. After conception occurs and one period has been missed, the woman should avoid intercourse entirely or at least for two to three months until the fetus is securely attached to the uterus.







Chapter Forty-twoToC

FRIGIDITY IN WOMEN

Meaning of Term Frigidity—Types of Frigidity—Large Percentage of Frigid Women—Repression of Sexual Manifestations and Frigidity—Frigidity and Masturbation—Frigidity and Sexual Weakness of Husband—Frigidity and Dislike of Husband—Organic Causes of Frigidity—A Frigid Woman May Become Passionate—Treatment of Frigidity.

Meaning of the Term Frigidity—Types of Frigidity—Large Percentage of Frigid Women—Repression of Sexual Expressions and Frigidity—Frigidity and Masturbation—Frigidity and Sexual Weakness of Husband—Frigidity and Dislike of Husband—Organic Causes of Frigidity—A Frigid Woman May Become Passionate—Treatment of Frigidity.


The word frigidity means coldness, and when a woman has no desire for sexual relations or experiences no pleasure when she has sexual relations, she is said to be frigid.

The word frigidity means coldness, and when a woman has no desire for sexual relations or feels no pleasure when she has sexual relations, she is said to be frigid.

Some cases suffer only from lack of desire, others only from lack of pleasure, and still others from both. In some cases the frigidity is congenital, that is, the lack of desire with inability to experience pleasure during the act is inborn. In most cases, however, it is acquired, or is only temporary, and is due to various causes. Frigidity is much more widespread among women than it is among men. Some physicians claim it is present in fifty per cent. of all women. This may be an exaggeration, but if we put the number at twenty-five per cent. we will be quite near the truth.

Some cases are only affected by a lack of desire, others by a lack of pleasure, and some experience both. In some instances, the frigidity is congenital, meaning the lack of desire and inability to feel pleasure during sex are inborn. However, in most cases, it is acquired or only temporary, caused by various factors. Frigidity is much more common among women than men. Some doctors claim it occurs in fifty percent of all women. This might be an exaggeration, but if we estimate the number at twenty-five percent, we would be pretty close to the truth.

[302]The causes of frigidity in women are many, but here are the most important ones: First and foremost is the repression of all sexual manifestations which the unmarried woman has to practice, and has had to practice for many centuries. So that a part of the frigidity is hereditary. You cannot entirely eradicate a natural instinct, but that by continually repressing it, by giving it no chance to assert itself, you may weaken it—about this there can be no question.

[302]The reasons for women’s lack of sexual desire are numerous, but here are the main ones: The most significant is the suppression of all sexual expressions that unmarried women have had to follow for many centuries. Consequently, part of this lack of desire is inherited. You can’t completely eliminate a natural instinct, but by consistently repressing it and not allowing it to express itself, you can diminish it—there’s no doubt about that.

The second cause is masturbation. Cases that have been addicted to excessive masturbation are very apt to develop not only frigidity, but complete aversion to the sexual act, and inability to experience any pleasure or orgasm. Such cases we come across every day.

The second cause is masturbation. People who have become addicted to excessive masturbation are likely to develop not just low sexual desire, but a complete aversion to sex, and an inability to feel any pleasure or orgasm. We encounter these cases every day.

A third very important cause is sexual weakness in the husband. When the husband is sexually weak (suffering with premature ejaculations) he either fails to awaken the sexual instinct in the woman, or if it has been awakened it is apt to turn not only into frigidity but into aversion to the act.

A third very important cause is sexual weakness in the husband. When the husband is sexually weak (dealing with premature ejaculation), he either fails to stimulate the woman's sexual desire, or if it has been stimulated, it often turns into not only frigidity but also a dislike for the act.

The fourth cause is often merely dislike towards the husband. The last two causes, weakness of the husband and dislike towards him, are unfortunately very frequent, and a wife who was frigid with one [303]husband may show herself very passionate on marrying another man.

The fourth reason is often just a dislike for the husband. The last two reasons, the husband's weakness and dislike for him, are unfortunately quite common, and a wife who was cold with one [303] husband may become very passionate when marrying another man.

The fifth cause is fear of pregnancy.

The fifth reason is fear of getting pregnant.

The above are the five principal causes. Other causes may be disease of the uterus, laceration of the cervix, inflammation of the ovaries, vaginismus, disease of the thyroid gland, etc.

The above are the five main causes. Other causes may include uterine diseases, cervical tears, ovarian inflammation, vaginismus, thyroid gland disorders, and so on.

It is an unfortunate fact that women who were frigid up to the age of forty or so may become very passionate after that age.

It’s an unfortunate reality that women who were indifferent to intimacy until about the age of forty may become quite passionate afterwards.

As to the treatment of frigidity, little or nothing can be done for frigidity that is congenital. Most of the other kinds of frigidity, however, can be cured.

As for the treatment of frigidity, there's not much that can be done for congenital frigidity. However, most other types of frigidity can be treated.







Chapter Forty-threeToC

ADVICE TO FRIGID WOMEN, PARTICULARLY WIVES

Advice to Frigid Women—Attitude of Different Men Towards Frigid Wives—Orgasm a Subjective Feeling—A Justifiable Innocent Deception—The Case of a Demi-Mondaine.

Advice to Cold Women—Different Men's Attitudes Towards Cold Wives—Orgasm is a Subjective Experience—A Reasonable Innocent Deception—The Case of a Demi-Mondaine.


I wish to give you a piece of advice which is of extremely great importance to you. I hesitated somewhat before writing this chapter, but the welfare of so many women depends upon following this advice, and I have seen the lives of so many wives spoiled on account of not having followed it, that I decided to devote a few words to the subject.

I want to share some important advice with you. I thought about it for a while before writing this chapter, but so many women's well-being relies on following this guidance. I've seen the lives of many wives negatively impacted because they didn't follow it, so I felt it was necessary to say a few things about it.

As you know, about one-third or one-quarter of all women (in other words, one out of every three or four) are sexually frigid. They either have little or no sexual desire, or if they do have, they experience no voluptuous sensation during the act, and never have an orgasm. If you are unmarried, well and good. But if you are married and happen to belong to the frigid type, then don't inform your husband of the fact. It may lead to great and permanent trouble. Some husbands don't care. Some [305]are even glad if their wives are frigid. They can then consult their own wishes in the matter, they can have intercourse whenever they want and the way they want. They do not have to accommodate themselves to their wives' ways, they do not have to prolong the act until she gets the orgasm, etc. In short, some husbands consider a frigid wife a blessing, a God-sent treasure. But, as I mentioned several times before, in sexual matters every man is a law unto himself, and some men feel extremely bad and displeased when they find out that their wives have "no feeling." Some become furious, some become disgusted. Some lose all pleasure in intercourse, and some claim to be unable to have intercourse with any woman who is not properly responsive. Some begin to go to other women, while some threaten or demand a divorce (of course, such men cannot really love their wives; they may use their wives' frigidity as an excuse to get rid of them).

As you know, about one-third or one-quarter of all women (in other words, one out of every three or four) struggle with sexual desire. They either have very little or no sexual desire at all, or if they do, they feel no pleasure during the act and never reach orgasm. If you are single, that’s fine. But if you’re married and find yourself in this situation, then don’t tell your husband. It could lead to significant and lasting issues. Some husbands are indifferent. Some [305]are even pleased if their wives are unresponsive. It allows them to prioritize their own needs; they can have sex whenever and however they want. They don’t have to adjust to their wife’s needs, nor do they have to wait for her to climax. In short, some husbands see a wife who lacks sexual response as a blessing, a gift. However, as I’ve said before, every man has his own feelings about sex, and some men feel deeply hurt and unhappy when they realize their wives have "no feeling." Some get angry, some feel disgusted. Others lose all enjoyment in sex, and some say they can’t be intimate with any woman who isn’t fully responsive. Some start seeking other partners, while others threaten or ask for a divorce (of course, these men likely don’t truly love their wives; they might use their wives' lack of desire as an excuse to leave).

Now, a man has no way of knowing whether a woman has a feeling during the act or not, whether or no she enjoys it, whether or no she has an orgasm. These are subjective feelings, and the man cannot know them unless you tell him. If you belong to the independent kind, if you scorn simulation and deceit, if, as the price of being perfectly truthful, [306]you are willing if necessary to part with your husband or give him a divorce, well and good. You are a free human being, and nobody has a right to tell you what to do with your body. But if you care for your husband, if you care for your home and perhaps children, and do not want any disruption, then the only thing for you to do is not to apprise your husband of your frigid condition. And it won't hurt you to simulate a feeling which you do not experience, and even to imitate the orgasm. He won't be any the wiser, he will enjoy you more, and nobody will be injured by your little deception, which is after all a species of white lie, and is nobody's business but your own. An innocent deception which hurts nobody, but, on the contrary, benefits all concerned, is perfectly permissible.

Now, a man has no way of knowing whether a woman is feeling something during intimacy or not, whether she enjoys it, or whether she has an orgasm. These are personal feelings, and a man can't know them unless you tell him. If you’re the independent type who values honesty and rejects pretense and deception, and if being completely truthful means you’re willing to leave your husband or get a divorce if necessary, that's great. You’re a free individual, and no one has the right to dictate what you do with your body. But if you care about your husband, your home, and possibly your kids, and want to avoid any disruption, then the best thing for you to do is not to inform your husband about your lack of pleasure. It won’t hurt you to pretend to feel something you don’t and even to fake an orgasm. He won’t know the difference, he’ll enjoy being with you more, and no one will be harmed by your little deception, which is really just a kind of white lie, and it’s nobody’s business but your own. An innocent deception that harms no one, but instead benefits everyone involved, is perfectly fine.

It may seem rather strange publicly to give advice to deceive and to simulate. And it is undoubtedly the first time that this advice has been given in print. But as I have only one religion—the greatest happiness of the greatest number—I repeat that I can see nothing wrong in advising something which benefits everybody (concerned) and hurts nobody. More than one household which was threatened with disruption was preserved safe and sound by a little simple advice which I gave to the wife, without the [307]husband's knowledge. He was satisfied, and things after that ran smoothly.

It might seem a bit odd to publicly suggest deception and pretense. And this is probably the first time this advice has been published. But since I only have one guiding principle—the greatest happiness for the greatest number—I maintain that there’s nothing wrong with offering advice that benefits everyone involved and harms no one. More than one family facing turmoil has been kept together thanks to some simple advice I gave to the wife, without the [307]husband knowing. He was content, and everything went smoothly after that.

Some women are afraid to simulate a voluptuous or orgastic feeling, because they think the husband can discover whether their feeling is genuine or they are only simulating. (Women, and men too, have funny ideas on sexual subjects). This is not so. A notorious demi-mondaine, who was greatly sought because she was known to be so "passionate," confessed that not once in her life did she enjoy intercourse or experience an orgasm. But her mother, who also suffered with absolute frigidity, taught her to simulate passion, telling her that in that way she could make barrels of money; which she did.

Some women hesitate to fake a voluptuous or orgasmic feeling because they believe their partners can tell if their emotions are real or just an act. (Both women and men have strange ideas about sex.) This isn’t true. A famous courtesan, who was in high demand for being so "passionate," admitted that she never actually enjoyed sex or had an orgasm in her life. Her mother, who also struggled with total frigidity, taught her to fake passion, saying it would help her make a lot of money, and that’s exactly what she did.

It is deplorable that wives—or husbands—should ever be obliged to have recourse to deception or simulation; perfect frankness should be the ideal to be striven after. But under our present social conditions and with the present moral code, an occasional white lie is the lesser of two evils; it may be the least of a dozen evils.

It’s unfortunate that wives—or husbands—should ever feel the need to resort to lies or pretense; complete honesty should be the goal we aim for. However, given our current social situation and moral standards, a little white lie can be the lesser of two evils; it might even be the least harmful among many options.







Chapter Forty-fourToC

RAPE

Definition of Rape—Age of Consent—Unanimous Opinion of Experts—Exceptional Cases—False Accusation of Rape Due to Perversion—Erotic Dreams Under Anesthesia Causing Accusations Against Doctors and Dentists.

Definition of Rape—Age of Consent—Unanimous Opinion of Experts—Exceptional Cases—False Accusation of Rape Due to Perversion—Erotic Dreams Under Anesthesia Causing Accusations Against Doctors and Dentists.


Having intercourse with a woman by force, without her consent, is called rape. When the woman is not in a condition to give consent, as when she is insane, feebleminded, unconscious or drunk, or when she is not of the age at which she can legally give consent, it also constitutes rape, and the punishment is the same. The age of consent differs in different countries and in different States, but as a rule is between sixteen and eighteen years. That is, if a girl under the legal age of consent should give her consent or even if she should urge the man to have intercourse with her the man would be punished just as if he had committed rape.

Having sex with a woman without her consent is called rape. This includes situations where the woman is unable to give consent, such as when she is mentally ill, has an intellectual disability, is unconscious, or is drunk, as well as when she is below the legal age to consent. The punishment for these cases is the same. The age of consent varies by country and state but is generally between sixteen and eighteen years old. This means that if a girl below the legal age of consent agrees to sex or even encourages a man to have sex with her, the man can be prosecuted just as if he had committed rape.

The punishment for rape is very severe in all civilized countries and ranges from ten years' imprisonment to life imprisonment, while in some States in this Union the punishment is death.

The punishment for rape is very harsh in all developed countries, ranging from ten years in prison to life in prison, and in some states in this country, the punishment is death.

[309]It is not my intention to go into an exhaustive discussion of this painful subject. In this brief chapter I merely wish to bring out two facts.

[309]I don't plan to dive into an in-depth discussion of this difficult topic. In this short chapter, I just want to highlight two points.

First, that it is the almost unanimous opinion of all experts that it is practically impossible for a man to commit rape on a normal adult girl or woman if she really offers all the resistance of which she is capable. Of course, if the man knocks the woman down with a blow, rendering her unconscious, that is a different matter. But where no brutality is used by the man, and the woman offers all the resistance she is capable of, rape is practically impossible. It is, however, possible that in some cases the girl may be so paralyzed by fear as to be incapable of offering any resistance. When the man threatens her with death or severe bodily injury, then it is rape even if she offers no resistance.

First, it’s the almost unanimous opinion of experts that it is practically impossible for a man to rape a normal adult girl or woman if she genuinely resists with all her strength. Of course, if the man knocks the woman down with a blow and makes her unconscious, that’s a different situation. But when no brutality is used and the woman fights back as hard as she can, rape is nearly impossible. However, there are cases where a girl might be so frozen by fear that she cannot resist at all. When the man threatens her with death or serious injury, then it is considered rape even if she does not resist.

The second point is that it has been established that of the many accusations of rape brought before the courts most are false. Out of a hundred cases only about ten are true. The rest are false. This false accusation of rape is due to a peculiar perversion with which some women suffer. Some of the cases are due to hysteria, to imagination, the women really believing that rape or an attempt at rape was committed on them, while investigation shows the accusation to be entirely false. Many [310]accusations of rape are due to a desire for revenge or merely to motives of blackmail.

The second point is that it has been shown that of the many accusations of rape brought before the courts, most are false. Out of a hundred cases, only about ten are true. The rest are false. This false accusation of rape stems from a strange issue that some women experience. Some cases are a result of hysteria or imagination, where the women genuinely believe that they were raped or that an attempt was made against them, while investigations reveal the accusation to be completely untrue. Many [310] accusations of rape are motivated by a desire for revenge or simply for extortion.

Careful doctors and dentists will refuse to give laughing gas or another anesthetic to women except in the presence of others, because, as is well known, an anesthetic often causes in women erotic dreams and sensations and makes them believe that the doctor was committing or about to commit an indecent assault on them, and when they come out of the anesthetic they may be so sure of the reality of their dream that they will bring a complaint against the doctor. Many men have suffered disgrace and imprisonment and have had their lives ruined or even paid the death penalty on account of false accusations against them by either pervert, hysterical, revengeful or blackmailing women.

Careful doctors and dentists will refuse to administer laughing gas or any other anesthetic to women unless there are witnesses present because it is well-known that anesthetics can trigger erotic dreams and sensations in women, leading them to believe that the doctor was committing or about to commit an inappropriate act. When they recover from the anesthetic, they may be so convinced that their dream was real that they file complaints against the doctor. Many men have faced disgrace, imprisonment, and have had their lives ruined, or even faced the death penalty, due to false accusations made by perverse, hysterical, vengeful, or blackmailing women.







Chapter Forty-fiveToC

THE SINGLE STANDARD OF SEXUAL MORALITY

Chastity—Double Standard of Morality—Attempt to Abolish Double Standard—Late Marriages and Chastity in Men—Harmful Advice Given to Young Women—Chastity in Men Not Always Due to Moral Principles—Chaste Men and Satisfactory Husbands—A Statement by Professor Freud—A Statement by Professor Michels—What a Girl has a Right to Demand of Her Future Husband—Three Cases Showing Disastrous Effects of Wrong Teachings.

Chastity—Double Standards in Morality—Efforts to Eliminate Double Standards—Late Marriages and Men's Chastity—Harmful Advice Given to Young Women—Men's Chastity Not Always Based on Moral Principles—Chaste Men and Good Husbands—A Comment by Professor Freud—A Comment by Professor Michels—What a Girl Can Rightfully Expect from Her Future Husband—Three Examples Illustrating the Bad Effects of Incorrect Teachings.


When a man marries a girl he expects her to be chaste, that is, a virgin, without any sexual experiences. Of men, the same chastity is not expected as a general thing. As long as a man is healthy, free from venereal disease, his previous sexual experiences do not constitute a barrier to his marriage. This is what is known as the double or duplex standard of sex morality.

When a man marries a woman, he expects her to be pure, meaning she is a virgin with no sexual experiences. However, this same level of purity is not typically expected of men. As long as a man is healthy and free from sexually transmitted diseases, his past sexual experiences do not pose a problem for marriage. This is referred to as the double standard of sexual morality.

During the past few years a number of high-minded and well-meaning men and women have been trying to abolish this double standard and to introduce a single standard of morality. That is, they are demanding that the man going to the marriage bed should be just as chaste, just as virginal as his [312]wife is. Whether or no the efforts of these good men and women will ever be crowned with success we will leave open. Whether or no it is even desirable that their efforts should be crowned with success we will also leave open. A complete discussion of these questions belongs to a more advanced book on sexual ethics. Here I will merely say that, taking into consideration the fact that the sexual instinct in boys awakens fully at the age of fifteen or sixteen, and that marriage at the present time, particularly among the professional classes, is an impossibility before the age of twenty-eight, thirty, or thirty-five, it seems to be impossible and undesirable to expect that men should live a perfectly chaste life until they enter matrimony, no matter how late that event may take place.

In recent years, a number of well-intentioned people have been working to eliminate this double standard and establish a single standard of morality. Essentially, they are arguing that a man preparing for marriage should be just as pure and virginal as his [312]wife. Whether these efforts will ultimately succeed is uncertain. Whether it is even a good idea for them to succeed is also up for debate. A thorough discussion of these issues would belong in a more advanced book on sexual ethics. Here, I will simply point out that considering the fact that boys' sexual instincts typically develop fully by the age of fifteen or sixteen, and that marriage today—especially among professionals—often doesn’t happen until the ages of twenty-eight, thirty, or thirty-five, it seems unrealistic and unreasonable to expect men to lead a completely chaste life until they marry, no matter how late that might be.

Those who have made a study of the sex instinct in the male seem to think that chastity in normal, healthy men up to the age of thirty or thereabouts is an impossibility, and where it is accomplished it is accomplished at the expense of the physical, mental, and sexual health of the individual. But be it as it may, and leaving disputed questions out of discussion, the fact remains that the vast majority of men of the present day do indulge in sex relations before marriage. And people that are urging upon our young women to refuse to marry men who have [313]not been perfectly chaste are doing our womanhood a very poor service. As it is now, with all mandom to choose from, there are many, too many, old maids. With only ten per cent. to choose from (because it is admitted that at least 90 per cent. of all men have ante-matrimonial relations), what would our women do? They would practically all have to give up any hopes of being married and becoming mothers. And if these ten per cent., who have remained chaste to their married day, were at least a superior class of men in every instance, there would be some compensation in that. Unfortunately, this is far from being the case, because, as all advanced sexologists will tell you, there is generally something wrong with a man who remains absolutely chaste until the age of thirty, thirty-five or forty. It isn't moral principles in all cases; it is mostly cowardice, or sexual weakness. And sad as it may be to state, these perfectly good, chaste men do not generally make satisfactory husbands, and their wives are not apt to be the happiest ones. I fully agree with Professor Freud in his statement "that sexual abstinence does not help to build up energetic, independent men of action, original thinkers, bold advocates of freedom and reform, but rather goody-goody weaklings." And still more to the purpose is the statement of Professor Michels, who says:

Those who study the male sex drive seem to believe that chastity in normal, healthy men up to around thirty is impossible, and when it is achieved, it often harms the individual’s physical, mental, and sexual health. Regardless, and setting aside any debated questions, the reality is that most men today engage in sexual relationships before marriage. Those who advise our young women to avoid marrying men who have not been completely chaste are doing a disservice to women. As it stands now, with so many men available, there are still too many old maids. If only ten percent are available (since it’s acknowledged that at least 90 percent of men have had sexual experiences before marriage), what would our women do? They might have to give up any hopes of marriage and motherhood. And if these ten percent who stayed chaste until marriage were actually a superior group of men, it might offer some compensation. Unfortunately, that’s not usually the case, because, as many sexologists will tell you, there’s often something off about a man who remains completely chaste until the ages of thirty, thirty-five, or forty. It's not always due to moral principles; more often, it's from cowardice or sexual inadequacy. Sadly, these perfectly chaste men don’t typically make the best husbands, and their wives often aren’t the happiest. I completely agree with Professor Freud when he states, “that sexual abstinence does not help to build energetic, independent men of action, original thinkers, bold advocates of freedom and reform, but rather goody-goody weaklings.” Even more relevant is Professor Michels’ statement, who says:

[314]"The desire that one's daughter may marry a man who, like herself, and on an equal footing, will gain in marriage his first experience of the most sacred mysteries of the sexual life, is one which may lead to profound disillusionments. Even if to-day the demand for chaste young men is extremely restricted, the supply is yet more so, and the article is of such an inferior quality that in actual practice the attempt to satisfy this desire is likely to lead to results which will fail altogether to correspond to the hopes inspired by a contemplation of the abstract idea of purity. Many physically intact individuals of both sexes are far more contaminated than those who have had actual sexual experience. Others again, superior in the abstract, and from the physically sexual aspect, are ethically inferior to the unchaste, so that the union with these latter would be more likely to prove happy than a union with those who are nominally pure." And further, "Careful fathers of marriageable daughters, who seek this virginity in their sons-in-law, will, if they find it, seldom find it a guarantee for the simultaneous possession of solid moral qualities."

[314]"The wish for one's daughter to marry a man who, like her, also gains his first experience of the deep and sacred aspects of sexual life in marriage can lead to serious disappointments. Even today, the demand for chaste young men is very limited, and the supply is even more scarce. The quality of those available is often so poor that trying to meet this desire is likely to result in outcomes that don't live up to the hopeful vision of purity. Many individuals, regardless of gender, who appear physically intact are often more tainted than those who have had real sexual experiences. Others, while seemingly better in theory and from a strictly physical standpoint, may be ethically worse than those who are unchaste, making a relationship with the latter more likely to be fulfilling than one with those who are simply labeled as pure." Additionally, "Careful fathers of marriageable daughters searching for this virginity in their sons-in-law will find that if they do find it, it rarely guarantees the presence of strong moral qualities."

All a girl has a right to demand is that her future husband be in good health, physically and sexually, and that he be free from venereal disease. His previous sexual life, provided he is a man of fine [315]moral character in general, is no concern of hers. Even if the man was unfortunate enough to have contracted gonorrhea, that fact should constitute no bar to marriage, provided he is completely cured of it. The only exception is that of syphilis. The girl has a right to refuse absolutely to enter into union with any man who has been infected with syphilis unless she is willing, and does it with her eyes open, to live her life without any children. In syphilis we can never give an absolute guarantee of cure and we have no right to subject a woman to any danger of infection with syphilis, be the danger ever so slight, without her knowledge and consent.

All a girl should expect is that her future husband is in good health, both physically and sexually, and that he is free from sexually transmitted infections. His past sexual life, as long as he is a man of good moral character overall, is not her concern. Even if he had the unfortunate experience of contracting gonorrhea, that should not prevent marriage, as long as he is completely cured. The only exception is syphilis. A girl has the right to completely refuse to marry any man who has been infected with syphilis unless she fully knows what she is getting into and is okay with living her life without any children. With syphilis, we can never provide an absolute guarantee of a cure, and we have no right to put a woman at any risk of contracting syphilis, no matter how small, without her knowledge and consent.


Disastrous Effects of Wrong Teachings

What disastrous effects wrong teaching which inoculates the minds of our women with wrong ideas may have, the following three cases reported briefly in The Critic and Guide, will show:

What disastrous effects incorrect teaching that fills our women's minds with wrong ideas can have, the following three cases reported briefly in The Critic and Guide, will show:

Case One was a girl of twenty-four, of well-to-do parents, a college graduate. She was engaged to a really very nice, sympathetic young man, who undoubtedly would have made her an excellent husband. But during her last two years in college she became imbued with the single standard stupidity, and "chastity for men, votes for women" became her slogan. She asked her fiancé if he had been [316]absolutely chaste before he met her. He did not want to play the hypocrite, and he told her the truth that he had not. But he assured her that he had never been infected and that his general and sexual health was in excellent condition. Being then in an exalted mood, she impulsively broke the engagement, declaring that her husband will have to be as "pure" as she was. She soon regretted her step, because she loved the man; but pride did not let her take the initiative towards a reconciliation, and in the meantime her former fiancé fell in love with and married another girl. After four years had passed, and she was in danger of becoming an old maid, she married a man considerably beneath her socially and intellectually, and in every way inferior to her former fiancé. Her marriage is not a happy one.

Case One was a twenty-four-year-old woman from a well-off family and a college graduate. She was engaged to a genuinely nice and understanding young man who would have made an excellent husband. However, during her last two years in college, she adopted a narrow-minded viewpoint, and "chastity for men, votes for women" became her motto. She asked her fiancé if he had been [316] completely chaste before meeting her. He didn't want to pretend and told her the truth—that he hadn't been. He reassured her that he had never been infected and that his overall and sexual health was excellent. In a moment of high emotion, she impulsively broke off the engagement, stating that her husband would have to be as "pure" as she was. She quickly regretted her decision because she loved him, but her pride prevented her from reaching out for a reconcilation. Meanwhile, her former fiancé fell in love with and married another woman. After four years had passed and with the risk of becoming an old maid looming, she married a man who was significantly below her in social status, intellect, and in every way compared to her former fiancé. Her marriage is not a happy one.

Case two is similar to case one, except that the young lady in question—now not so very young—is still living in single blessedness, and the chances of her ever being a wife or even somebody's sweetheart are rapidly vanishing. I might add that her fiancé whom she discarded because of his lack of virginity was a very bright young physician, who is now very successful and very happily married. She I hear is a very unhappy person, in danger of sinking into a permanent state of melancholia. And she had been of a very jolly disposition.

Case two is similar to case one, except that the young woman in question—now not so young anymore—is still living alone and the chances of her ever becoming a wife or even someone's girlfriend are quickly fading. I should mention that her ex-fiancé, whom she rejected due to his lack of virginity, was a brilliant young doctor who is now very successful and happily married. I've heard that she is quite unhappy, at risk of falling into a permanent state of sadness. She used to be very cheerful.

[317]Case three is peculiar in that the fiancé was absolutely chaste. She asked him, and he told her that he had never had any relations with anybody and he never had a trace or suspicion of any venereal disease. The young lady was not satisfied. She wanted her fiancé to bring her a certificate from a specialist testifying to that effect. The young man told her that it was foolish, that he would not subject himself to the expense and annoyance of a number of tests when he knew that not only did he not have any venereal disease, but that there was no possibility of his getting any. No, that did not satisfy her. She became suspicious. "If you have nothing to fear, why do you object to bringing a certificate?" "I have nothing to fear, but I demand that you respect me and trust me sufficiently to believe that I am telling the truth when I declare a thing with such positiveness. If you do not have that much confidence in me now, our future life does not hold much promise of success." One word led to another, and then he broke the engagement, as any self-respecting man under the circumstances would. He is married, and she is not and probably never will be. Three young lives ruined by perverse teachings.

[317]Case three is unusual because the fiancé was completely innocent. She asked him, and he told her that he had never been with anyone and that he had never had any hint or suspicion of any sexually transmitted disease. The young woman wasn't satisfied. She wanted her fiancé to get a certificate from a specialist confirming that. The young man told her that it was silly, that he wouldn't put himself through the expense and hassle of multiple tests when he knew he didn’t have any sexually transmitted disease, and that there was no chance of him getting one. That still didn’t satisfy her. She became suspicious. "If you have nothing to hide, why do you refuse to get a certificate?" "I have nothing to hide, but I ask that you respect me and trust me enough to believe I'm being honest when I say this so confidently. If you don’t have that much faith in me now, our future together doesn’t look too promising." One thing led to another, and then he ended the engagement, as any self-respecting man would in that situation. He is married now, and she isn’t and probably never will be. Three young lives ruined because of misguided beliefs.







Chapter Forty-sixToC

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MAN'S AND WOMAN'S SEX AND LOVE LIFE

Seemingly Contradictory Statements—Faulty Interpretations of Words Sexual Instinct and Love—Difference in Manifestations of Male and Female Sexual Instincts—Man's Sex Instinct Grosser Than Woman's—Awakening of Sexual Desire in the Boy and in the Girl—Woman's Desire for Caresses—Man's Main Desire for Sexual Relations—Normal Sex Relations as Means of Holding a Man—A Physiological Reason Why Man is Held—Man and Physical Love—Woman and Spiritual Love—Preliminaries of Sexual Intercourse in Men and Women—Physical Attributes—Mental and Spiritual Qualities—Difference Between Love and "Being in Love"—Love as a Stimulus to Man—When the Man Loves—When the Woman Loves—Man's More Engrossing Interests—Lovemaking Irksome to Man—Man's Polygamous Tendencies—Woman Single-affectioned in Her Sex and Love Life—Man and Woman Biologically Different.

Seemingly Contradictory Statements—Misunderstandings of Words Sexual Instinct and Love—Differences in How Male and Female Sexual Instincts Are Expressed—Men’s Sexual Instinct Is Coarser Than Women’s—The Awakening of Sexual Desire in Boys and Girls—Women’s Desire for Affection—Men’s Primary Desire for Sexual Relationships—Normal Sexual Relationships as a Way to Keep a Man—A Biological Reason Why Men Are Held—Men and Physical Love—Women and Spiritual Love—Preliminaries of Sexual Intercourse in Men and Women—Physical Traits—Mental and Spiritual Attributes—Difference Between Love and "Being in Love"—Love as a Motivation for Men—When Men Love—When Women Love—Men’s More Compelling Interests—Lovemaking Annoying to Men—Men’s Polygamous Tendencies—Women’s Singular Affection in Their Sexual and Love Lives—Men and Women Are Biologically Different.


In reading books or listening to lectures on sex, you will meet with statements which will seem to you contradictory. One time you will read or hear that the sex instinct is much more powerfully developed in man than it is in woman; next time you will come across the statement that sex plays a much more important rôle in women than it does in men. One time you will hear that men are oversexed, that they are by nature polygamous and [319]promiscuous, while woman is monogamous and as a rule sexually frigid; the next time you will be assured that without love a woman's life is nothing, and you will be confronted with Byron's well-known and oft quoted two lines: Man's love is of man's life a thing apart, 'Tis woman's whole existence.

In reading books or listening to lectures about sex, you’ll come across statements that seem contradictory. One moment you might read or hear that the sex drive is much stronger in men than in women; the next, you'll find the claim that sex is far more significant for women than for men. At one point, you’ll hear that men are oversexed, naturally polygamous and [319]promiscuous, while women are monogamous and generally sexually unresponsive; then you’ll be told that without love, a woman’s life is meaningless, and you’ll be reminded of Byron's famous lines: Man's love is of man's life a thing apart, 'Tis woman's whole existence.

These contradictions are only apparent and result from two facts: first, that the words sex or sexual instinct and love are used indiscriminately and interchangeably as if they were synonymous terms, which they are not; second, there is failure to bear in mind the essential differences in the natures and manifestations of the sexual instincts in the male and the female. If these differences are made clear, the apparent contradictions will disappear. The outstanding fact to bear in mind is that in man the sex instinct bears a more sensual, a more physical, a coarser and grosser character, if you have no objection to these adjectives, than it does in woman. In women it is finer, more spiritual, more platonic, to use this stereotyped and incorrect term. In men the sex manifestations are more centralized, more local, more concentrated in the sex organs; in women they are more diffused throughout the body. In a boy of fifteen the libido sexualis may be fully developed, he may have powerful erections and a strong desire for normal sexual relations; in a girl [320]of fifteen there may not be a trace of any purely sexual desire; and this lack of desire for physical sex relations may manifest itself in women up to the age of twenty or twenty-five (something that we never see in normal men); in fact, women of twenty-five and even older, who have not been stimulated and whose curiosity has not been aroused by novels, pictures, and tales of their married companions, may not experience any sexual desire until several months after marriage. But while their desire for actual sexual relations awakens much later than it does in men, their desire for love, for caresses, for hugging, for close friendship, for love letters, awakens much earlier than in men, and occupies a greater part in their life; they think of love more during their waking hours, and they dream of it more than men do.

These contradictions only seem to exist and stem from two main points: first, the terms sex or sexual instinct and love are often used interchangeably as if they mean the same thing, which they don’t; second, there’s a failure to recognize the fundamental differences in how sexual instincts show up in males and females. Once we clarify these differences, the apparent contradictions will vanish. The key point to remember is that in men, the sex instinct has a more sensual, physical, and rougher quality—if you don’t mind those descriptions—than it does in women. In women, it’s more refined, more spiritual, and more platonic, though that term is often misused. In men, sexual expressions are more focused, localized, and centralized in the sexual organs; in women, they’re more spread out throughout the body. A fifteen-year-old boy may have a fully developed sexual drive, strong erections, and a high desire for typical sexual interactions; however, a fifteen-year-old girl may show no signs of any purely sexual desire, and this lack of desire for physical intimacy can persist in women until they’re twenty or twenty-five (something we never see in typical men). In fact, women in their mid-twenties and older, who haven’t experienced stimulation and whose curiosity hasn’t been piqued by novels, images, and stories from their married friends, may not feel any sexual desire until several months after getting married. But while their appetite for actual sexual encounters awakens much later than in men, their desire for love, affection, cuddling, close friendships, and love letters tends to develop much earlier and plays a larger role in their lives; they think about love more during the day and dream about it more than men do.

A man—always bear in mind that when speaking of men and women I always speak of the average; exceptions in either direction will be found in both sexes—a man, I say, will generally tire of paying attentions to a woman if he feels that they will not eventually lead to the biologic goal—sexual relations. A woman can keep up with a man for years without any sexual intercourse, being fully satisfied or more or less satisfied with the sexual substitutes—embraces and kisses.

A man—just keep in mind that when I talk about men and women, I’m referring to the average; there are always exceptions in both directions for both sexes—a man, as I said, will usually get tired of paying attention to a woman if he thinks those efforts won't ultimately lead to the biological goal—sex. A woman can maintain a relationship with a man for years without having sex, feeling fully satisfied or at least somewhat satisfied with physical affection—hugs and kisses.

[321]And here is as good a place as any to refer to the notion so assiduously inculcated in the minds of young women, that a persistent refusal of man's demands is a sure way of keeping a man's affections; that as soon as man has satisfied his desires, he has no further use for the girl. This may be the case with the lowest dregs—morally—of the male sex; it is the opposite of true of the male sex as a whole. And I believe that Marcel Prevost was the first one to point it out (in his Le Jardin Secret). Nothing will hold a man's affections so surely as normal sex relations. And the cause of this is not, as might be surmised, merely a moral one, the man considering himself in honor and duty bound to stick to the woman whose body he possessed. No, there is a much stronger and surer reason: the reason is of a physiological character. There is born a strong physical attraction which in the man's subconsciousness plays a stronger rôle than honor and duty. Excesses of course must be avoided, for excesses lead to satiety, and satiety is just as inimical to love as is excitement without any satisfaction.

[321]And this is as good a place as any to talk about the idea that is so heavily drilled into young women—that constantly saying no to a man’s advances is a reliable way to keep his affection; that once a man gets what he wants, he has no further interest in the girl. This may be true for the lowest types of men, but it’s the opposite for men overall. I believe Marcel Prevost was the first to point this out (in his Le Jardin Secret). Nothing secures a man's affection more than healthy sexual relationships. The reason isn’t just a moral one, where the man feels obligated to stay with the woman whose body he has taken. No, there’s a much stronger reason: it’s physiological. A strong physical attraction is born, which plays a bigger role in a man's subconscious than honor and duty. Of course, excess should be avoided, as it leads to boredom, and boredom is just as harmful to love as excitement without any fulfillment.


Choice Between Physical and Spiritual Love

But to return to our thesis: the difference between man's and woman's sex and love life. If a man had to make his choice between physical love, i.e., actual [322]sex relations and spiritual love, i.e., love making, kisses, love letters, etc., he would generally choose the former. If a woman had to choose, she would generally choose the latter. The man and the woman would prefer both at the same time: physical and spiritual love. But that is not the question. The question is: if it came to a choice; and then the results would be as I have just indicated. The correctness of my statements will be corroborated by anybody having some knowledge of human sexuality. A man can fully enjoy sexual intercourse without any preliminaries; with a woman the preliminaries are of the utmost importance, and when these are lacking she is often incapable of experiencing any pleasure. Nay, the feeling of pleasure is not infrequently replaced by a feeling of dissatisfaction and even disgust. A man cares more for the physical and less for the mental and spiritual attributes of his sexual partner; with the woman just the opposite is the case. I am leaving out of consideration sexual impotence, because this is a real disability, and a man suffering with it only irritates the woman without satisfying her. For this she will not stand. But where the man is sexually potent—he may be aged and homely—his other physical attributes play but a small rôle with woman; his mental and spiritual qualities count with her for a good deal more. [323]While a woman may be able to give a man perfect sexual satisfaction, and she may have an angelic character, if her body is not all that could be desired, the man will be dissatisfied and unhappy.

But to get back to our main point: the difference between men's and women's sex and love lives. If a man had to choose between physical love, meaning actual sex, and spiritual love, which includes making out, kisses, love letters, and so on, he would usually pick physical love. On the other hand, if a woman had to choose, she'd typically opt for spiritual love. Ideally, both men and women would want both at the same time: physical and spiritual love. But that's not the main question. The question is: if it came down to a choice; and the outcomes would be as I've just described. Anyone with some understanding of human sexuality will confirm what I've said. A man can fully enjoy sexual intercourse without any buildup; for a woman, the buildup is crucial, and without it, she often can't feel any pleasure. In fact, the feeling of pleasure is often replaced by dissatisfaction and even disgust. A man tends to focus more on the physical and less on the mental and emotional qualities of his sexual partner; for a woman, it's the opposite. I'm ignoring the issue of sexual impotence here because it's a genuine problem, and a man dealing with it only frustrates the woman without satisfying her. She won't tolerate that. However, when a man is sexually capable—regardless of his age or looks—his other physical attributes matter less to a woman; his mental and emotional qualities carry much more weight for her. While a woman may be able to provide a man with complete sexual satisfaction and have a wonderful personality, if her body doesn't meet his expectations, he will feel dissatisfied and unhappy.


Love in Man Occupies Subordinate Place

Try as we may, we cannot get away from the fact that in man's life love occupies a subordinate place. I am speaking now of love, and not of "being in love." Being in love, as pointed out in another place, is a distinctly pathological phenomenon, akin to insanity, and when a man is in love it may engross every fiber of him, it may preoccupy every minute of his waking hours, he may neglect all his work and shirk all his duties, in fact he is apt to make a much bigger fool of himself than a woman is under similar circumstances. He is less patient, he has less control over himself, he is less able to suffer, he is less capable of self-sacrifice. But this, as I said, all refers to "being in love," which is an entirely different thing from loving. A man may love ever so deeply, and if his love is reciprocated he will go on with his work in a smooth, unruffled manner. He will do better work for it—love is a wonderful stimulus—but he will be perfectly satisfied if he sees his love for an hour or two every day, or even once or twice a week. And if he has i[324]mportant and interesting work to do, he can part with his love for three months or six months without his heart breaking. Not so with woman. A woman who loves considers every day on which she does not see her lover a day lost. And she is apt to be unhappy and inefficient in her work on such days, and she bears separation with much greater difficulty than does man. I do not think that this is due to the fact that a woman's love is always more intense than a man's; no. But he usually has other interests which occupy his thoughts and his emotions, while most women's thoughts and emotions are centered on the man they love. When a woman loves, she could and would spend all her time with the man she loves. She would never tire of love making (I am not referring here to sex relations), or merely of being in the man's proximity. To woman love is a cloyless thing. Man distinctly does tire. No matter how much he may love a woman, too much lovemaking becomes cloying to him, and he wants to get away. Even mere proximity, if too prolonged, becomes irksome to him, and he begins to fret and fidget, and pull at his chains, even if the chains are but of gossamer. Woman should know these facts and act accordingly.

Try as we might, we can't escape the fact that in a man's life, love takes a backseat. I'm talking about love here, not "being in love." As mentioned elsewhere, being in love is more like a mental illness; when a guy is in love, it can consume him completely, taking over every moment of his waking hours. He might neglect his work and dodge his responsibilities, and frankly, he often ends up acting more foolishly than a woman would in the same situation. He's less patient, has less self-control, can handle less suffering, and is not as good at self-sacrifice. But again, this all pertains to "being in love," which isn't the same as loving. A man can love deeply, and if his feelings are returned, he can carry on with his work smoothly and without disruption. In fact, love can be a great motivator, and he'll be perfectly content if he sees the person he loves for an hour or two daily, or even just a couple of times a week. If he has significant and engaging work to do, he can go without seeing his love for three or six months without his heart breaking. Not so for women. A woman in love sees every day she doesn't spend with her partner as a wasted day. On those days, she tends to feel unhappy and struggles to focus on her work, handling separation with much more difficulty than a man. I don't believe this is because a woman's love is inherently more intense than a man's; it’s different. A man typically has other interests that occupy his thoughts and emotions, while many women concentrate all their thoughts and feelings on the man they love. When a woman loves, she could easily spend all her time with him, and she would never tire of being close to him (I’m not specifically talking about sexual relations here). For a woman, love is never too much. A man, on the other hand, can get tired. No matter how much he loves a woman, too much intimacy can overwhelm him, and he will want some space. Even being close to her for too long can start to feel bothersome, and he begins to feel restless, even if those constraints are just light. Women should understand these realities and adjust their behavior accordingly.


[325]Polygamous Tendencies in Man

We now come to the last point in our discussion: the polygamous or varietist tendencies in the male versus the monogamous tendencies in the female. No matter what our moralists, who try to fit the facts to their theories instead of fitting their theories to the facts, may say, the fact remains that man is a strongly polygamous or varietist animal. That many men live through their lives without having had relations with any women except their wives is cheerfully admitted. I assert this in spite of the incredulous smiles of all the cynics and roués in the world. I have known personally a great number of such men. But that they do it without any struggle, and in some cases a very severe struggle, is emphatically denied. And that hundreds of thousands of men are unequal to the struggle—or do not care to engage in any struggle—and live a sexually promiscuous life—anybody who knows anything about life as it is will testify. And his testimony will be corroborated by the reports of the vice commissions and the statements of disreputable-house keepers. To a great percentage of men a strictly monogamous life is either irksome, painful, disagreeable or an utter impossibility. While the number of women who are not satisfied with one mate is exceedingly small.

We now come to the last point in our discussion: the polygamous or variety-seeking tendencies in men versus the monogamous tendencies in women. No matter what our moralists, who try to make the facts fit their theories instead of aligning their theories with the facts, may say, the truth is that men are significantly polygamous or variety-seeking creatures. It's widely acknowledged that many men go through life without having relationships with any women other than their wives. I state this despite the skeptical smirks of all the cynics and libertines out there. I have personally known many of these men. However, claiming that they do this without any struggle—or in some cases, a very serious struggle—is definitely false. And the fact that hundreds of thousands of men are either unable to handle the struggle or choose not to engage in it, leading to a sexually promiscuous lifestyle, is something anyone who understands real life will confirm. This testimony will be supported by findings from vice commissions and statements from those involved in less reputable establishments. For a significant number of men, living a strictly monogamous life is either burdensome, painful, unpleasant, or completely impossible. Meanwhile, the number of women who aren't happy with just one partner is exceedingly small.

[326]A man may love a woman deeply and sincerely and at the same time make love to another woman, or have sexual relations with her or even with prostitutes. It is quite a common thing with men. It is quite a rare thing with women, though it may happen. As iterated and reiterated time and again, there are always exceptional cases, but we are speaking of the average and not of the exception. The rule is that in her sex and love life woman is much more loyal, much more faithful, much more single-affectioned than is her lord and master—man.

[326]A man can love a woman deeply and sincerely while also being intimate with another woman, or having casual sex, or even seeing prostitutes. This is pretty common for men. However, it’s relatively rare for women, though it does happen. As has been said many times, there are always exceptions, but we're talking about the average, not the exceptions. The rule is that in terms of sex and love, women tend to be much more loyal, more faithful, and more singularly devoted than their male counterparts.

Is she on account of it better than, superior to, man? It is futile to speak of better or worse, of superior or inferior. This is the way they are. This is the way man and woman have been made by nature, by a thousand centuries of heredity, by a thousand centuries of environment. The differences lie in biological roots, and it is futile to fight and rail against nature and biology. The proper thing to do is to recognize the facts and make the best of them. To act the part of the ostrich, deliberately to ignore facts which are not pleasant, may be easy, but is it wise?

Is she, because of this, better than or superior to man? It's pointless to talk about better or worse, superior or inferior. This is just how it is. This is how man and woman have been shaped by nature, by thousands of years of heredity, by thousands of years of environment. The differences are rooted in biology, and it's pointless to fight against nature and biology. The right thing to do is to acknowledge the facts and make the best of them. Acting like an ostrich and deliberately ignoring unpleasant facts might be easy, but is it really wise?







Chapter Forty-sevenToC

MATERNAL IMPRESSIONS

Wide-spread Belief in Maternal Impressions—No Single Well-authenticated Case of Maternal Impression—Birth of Monstrosities—Ridiculous Examples Given by Physicians—So-called Shock Often a Product of Mother's Imagination—Four Cases of Alleged Maternal Impressions—Mother's Health During Pregnancy May Have Effect Upon Child's General Health.

Wide-spread Belief in Maternal Impressions—No Single Well-Verified Case of Maternal Impression—Birth of Abnormalities—Laughable Examples Provided by Doctors—So-called Shock Often a Result of Mother's Imagination—Four Cases of Supposed Maternal Impressions—Mother's Health During Pregnancy May Affect Child's Overall Health.


It is believed by many people that strong impressions made upon the mother during pregnancy may produce marks or defects in the child. This belief dates from earliest antiquity, and is widespread among all races. The belief particularly refers to the emotions of fright or sudden surprise; thus it is believed that if a woman during pregnancy should be frightened by some animal, the child might carry the mark of the animal upon its body, or it might even be born in the shape of the animal. Thousands of such alleged cases are given in proof. There is hardly a layman, or, particularly, a laywoman, who does not claim to know of authentic cases of maternal impressions.

Many people believe that strong impressions made on a mother during pregnancy can result in marks or defects on the child. This belief goes back to ancient times and is common across all cultures. It particularly relates to feelings of fear or sudden surprise; for example, if a pregnant woman is scared by an animal, it’s thought that the child might have a mark of that animal on its body or could even be born resembling the animal. Thousands of such alleged cases are cited as evidence. Almost everyone, especially women, claims to know real examples of maternal impressions.

It is a thankless task to try to shatter [328]well-established beliefs, and I do not hope to succeed in persuading all my readers that all the stories and examples of maternal impressions are untrue and lack scientific foundation. But I consider it my duty to state my belief, whether you accept it or not. In my opinion there is not a single well-authenticated case of maternal impression. There is hardly a case of defect or monstrosity where the cause is supposed to be due to maternal impression, which cannot be explained in some natural way, or simply by accident. Thousands of women are frightened or shocked by disagreeable sights, by crippled men, by animals, and still their children are born perfectly normal. On the other hand, many marked, or defective, or monstrous children are born in which no maternal impressions can be given as the cause. So why can it not happen when the mother was frightened by something during her pregnancy, and the child was born with some mark or defect, that the latter was simply an accident and not the result of the impression? Because a thing follows another thing it does not mean that it was caused by that other thing.

It’s a tough job to try to break down [328]long-held beliefs, and I don’t expect to convince all my readers that all the stories and examples of maternal impressions are false and lack scientific backing. But I feel it’s my responsibility to share my belief, whether you agree or not. In my view, there isn't a single well-documented case of maternal impression. Almost every case of a defect or abnormality said to be caused by maternal impression can be explained in a natural way or simply by chance. Thousands of women are disturbed or shocked by unpleasant sights, by disabled people, or by animals, yet their children are born completely healthy. Conversely, many children born with notable defects or abnormalities have no maternal impressions that can be cited as the cause. So why, when a mother is frightened by something during her pregnancy and the child is born with some mark or defect, can't we simply consider it an accident and not the result of that fright? Just because one thing follows another doesn’t mean it was caused by that other thing.

Many of the cases given as examples, and by physicians too, are so ridiculous that no scientific man can give them the slightest credence for one moment. When a physician (Dr. Thomas J. [329]Savage) tells us that he attended a lady who had been frightened by a large green frog at or about the middle of pregnancy, and that she gave birth to a monstrosity, the head of which was that of a large frog in shape, with the eyes and mouth and even the coloring of a frog, then he is either telling an untruth, or he shows himself as ignorant and credulous as any illiterate old woman can be. The doctor should know that at the middle of pregnancy the child is fully formed and that there is no possibility of an already formed human being changing its shape into that of an animal. Another example given by the same doctor, and showing the calibre of his mentality, is that of a child which, when an infant, not old enough to walk, "would crawl over the floor and pick up little objects such as pins, tacks, small beads, without the slightest difficulty or fumbling." The reason for this "remarkable" skill the good doctor ascribes to the fact that four months before the birth of this child the mother had an outing in the woods and had derived great enjoyment from gathering hickory nuts which she found scattered among the leaves with which the ground was thickly covered!

Many of the examples provided, even by doctors, are so absurd that no scientific person can believe them for even a second. When a doctor (Dr. Thomas J. [329]Savage) claims he attended a woman who was startled by a large green frog during her pregnancy, and that she gave birth to a creature with a head shaped like a frog—complete with frog-like eyes, mouth, and coloring—it seems he is either lying or as ignorant and gullible as any uneducated old woman. The doctor should understand that by the middle of pregnancy, the baby is fully formed and there’s no way an already developed human could change into an animal. Another example from the same doctor, highlighting his mindset, is about a baby who, before it could walk, "would crawl across the floor and pick up small items like pins, tacks, and beads with no trouble at all." The reason for this "amazing" ability, according to the good doctor, is that four months before the child was born, the mother had a trip to the woods and thoroughly enjoyed gathering hickory nuts scattered among the leaves on the ground!

Very often the so-called shock or fright which the mother experiences during gestation is simply a product of her imagination. We know of many cases [330]where the mothers never mentioned that anything happened to them, and only after the child was born with some kind of mark or defect they began to hunt for causes and claimed that such and such a thing happened to them while they were pregnant, but on close investigation the alleged event was found to have originated in the mother's brain.

Very often, the so-called shock or fright that a mother feels during pregnancy is just a product of her imagination. We know of many cases [330] where the mothers never mentioned anything happening to them, and only after the child was born with some kind of mark or defect did they start looking for reasons and claimed that certain things happened to them while they were pregnant. However, upon closer investigation, the supposed events were found to have come from the mother's mind.

In short, while the subject of maternal impressions is an interesting one and demands further investigation, there is at the present time no scientific justification for the belief in maternal impressions. Particularly must we scout any stories of maternal impressions during the latter part of pregnancy, during the fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, or ninth month. Because after the child is fully formed no mental or psychic impressions can make birthmarks on it, amputate its limbs, or convert it into any sort of monstrosity.

In short, while the topic of maternal impressions is an intriguing one that needs more research, there’s currently no scientific basis for believing in them. We especially need to dismiss any stories about maternal impressions during the later stages of pregnancy—the fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, or ninth month. Once the baby is fully formed, no mental or psychic impressions can create birthmarks, remove limbs, or turn it into any kind of abnormality.

After the above was written and ready for the printer I came across four cases of alleged maternal impressions in a book by Laura A. Calhoun ("Sex Determination and Its Practical Application"). The first three cases the author relates without any comment, taking them evidently for pure coin. The fourth case the lady investigated, and she is frank to say that what seemed at first as a clear case of maternal impression was nothing of the kind but [331]merely a case of heredity. In order to break the monotony for a little while I will reproduce here the four cases in the lady's own words.

After I finished writing and it was ready for the printer, I found four cases of alleged maternal impressions in a book by Laura A. Calhoun ("Sex Determination and Its Practical Application"). The first three cases were presented by the author without any comments, clearly seeing them as simple coincidences. The fourth case was investigated by the author, and she openly stated that what initially appeared to be a clear case of maternal impression was actually nothing more than [331] a case of heredity. To break the monotony for a bit, I will share the four cases in her own words.

The first was that of "a mother who, during pregnancy, was obliged for a certain continuous time to eat sheep's flesh. She took such a sudden abhorrence and distaste of the meat that she only ate it rather than go meat hungry. After the birth of her baby she recovered from this spasmodic distaste of this particular meat. But the child from its first meat-eating days could not endure the smell or the taste of the sheep's flesh. Whenever the child attempted to eat that meat, the result was always the same—indigestion and want of assimilation, and usually attended with acute indigestion cramps."

The first was about "a mother who, during her pregnancy, had to eat sheep's meat for an extended period. She developed such a sudden disgust and aversion to the meat that she only ate it to avoid going meatless. After she gave birth, she got over her intense dislike for that specific meat. However, from the very beginning of her child's meat-eating days, the child couldn't stand the smell or taste of sheep's meat. Whenever the child tried to eat it, it always ended with the same issues—indigestion and difficulty digesting properly, often accompanied by severe stomach cramps."

In the second case "another pregnant mother's particular 'longing' was for mackerel. Her baby was born with what seemed to be the outlines, in a brownish color, of a mackerel on its side, and which design never faded in after years, and the child's ability to eat and digest mackerel was more than normal."

In the second case, another pregnant mother's specific 'craving' was for mackerel. Her baby was born with what looked like the outlines, in a brownish color, of a mackerel on its side, and that mark never went away as the child grew up. The kid's ability to eat and digest mackerel was above average.

The third case: "The 'longing' of another pregnant mother was for brains to eat. This was provided for her. But as she was slowly approaching the dish of deliciously prepared food, quivering with delight and with the eagerness of a child to be eating it, a cat sprang to the plate and before she could prevent it ate the brains and licked the plate clean. [332]She wept as a child might have done, and was as unhappy and brokenhearted over this fate of the brains food for which she had waited with such keen anticipation of satisfaction as a little child might have been. Shortly after that the little baby was born, and upon one of its shoulder-blades was a representation of the mess of brains, designed in brownish outlines, and which did not fade as the child grew up."

The third case: "Another pregnant mother longed for brains to eat. This was provided for her. But as she was slowly getting closer to the plate of deliciously prepared food, shivering with delight and the eagerness of a child to eat it, a cat jumped onto the plate and, before she could stop it, ate the brains and licked the plate clean. [332] She cried like a child might, feeling as unhappy and heartbroken over the loss of the brains she had anticipated with such excitement as a little kid would have. Shortly after that, the baby was born, and on one of its shoulder blades was a depiction of the mess of brains, designed in brownish outlines, which didn’t fade as the child grew up."

The fourth case: "There lived in a little house in the midst of a flower garden, that in its turn gave into a wide-spreading orchard, a loving and loyal husband and wife with their firstborn child. The wife was now in the first months of pregnancy with her second child. Their nearest neighbor was a Mexican family, among the members of which was a dashing young man of about twenty-two. He and his sister and mother were frequent visitors to this little household of three. But the young Mexican was the most frequent, and the husband's being home or not did not disconcert him. Men of affairs must need spend morning hours, and sometimes afternoon hours, too, inside of offices, but wealthy and aristocratic young Mexicans ride horses all day, decked out with silver, leather, and velvet trappings, both horse and rider. It was this lady's custom to walk among her flowers and fruit trees. And it became the custom of this young caballero to suddenly appear before her during these promenades. Her startled eyes would no sooner perceive the vision of his blazing, dark eyes fastened upon her, than [333]by one pretext and another she made him understand that he was dismissed, and would herself retire into the house. When she would be about to open a gate, suddenly and unexpectedly the young Mexican would appear on the other side and with gracious suavity open the gate, always his passionate, dark eyes upon her, though his words were reserved and polite. If the husband were present, it was still the same. By every means possible he would prolong his stay.

The fourth case: "There lived in a small house in the middle of a flower garden, which led into a sprawling orchard, a loving and devoted husband and wife with their firstborn child. The wife was now in the early months of her pregnancy with their second child. Their closest neighbor was a Mexican family, which included a charming young man around twenty-two. He, along with his sister and mother, often visited this little family. However, the young Mexican was the most frequent visitor, and he didn't seem bothered whether the husband was home or not. Businessmen had to spend morning hours, and sometimes afternoons, in offices, but wealthy and aristocratic young Mexicans would ride horses all day, decked out in silver, leather, and velvet gear, both horse and rider. This lady often walked among her flowers and fruit trees. It also became this young caballero's habit to appear unexpectedly before her during these walks. As soon as her startled eyes met his intense, dark gaze, she would find various excuses to signal that he was not welcome and would retreat into the house. Just as she was about to open a gate, the young Mexican would suddenly appear on the other side and graciously hold it open, his passionate, dark eyes always on her, even though his words remained polite and reserved. If the husband was present, it was the same. The young man did everything he could to extend his visit."

One summer day this lady was lying on her couch on the veranda, sleeping, her eyes covered over. At that time she was having an eye malady that was epidemic in that part of the country. She heard footsteps approaching, but did not disturb herself, as she supposed it was her husband. After some time she suddenly threw off the covering from her face, and there to her astonished eyes stood the young Mexican, intensely looking down upon her with deep concern. At that moment the husband arrived, and the young man told him of a weed growing in that locality that he said would cure the eye malady. When the leaves of this plant were crushed there oozed a yellowish milk; with about a half-dozen applications of this milk to the sore eyes they were healed.

One summer day, this woman was lying on her couch on the porch, asleep, with her eyes covered. She was dealing with an eye condition that was common in that area. She heard footsteps coming closer but didn’t move, thinking it was her husband. After a while, she suddenly removed the covering from her face and was shocked to see a young Mexican man intently looking down at her with a look of deep concern. Just then, her husband arrived, and the young man told him about a weed that grew in the area, claiming it could cure her eye condition. When the leaves of this plant were crushed, a yellowish liquid oozed out; after about half a dozen applications of this liquid to her sore eyes, they were healed.

After that the young caballero would ride up and down, Mexican fashion, in front of the house, drawing rein whenever he could get a glimpse of the lady or a word with her. This never failed to annoy her, and also to strike a sudden, sharp terror into her [334]heart. Always his appearance was most unexpected, and always accompanied by the rapt, passionate, dark gaze. Though he was a most clean-souled young man.

After that, the young guy would ride back and forth, Mexican style, in front of the house, stopping whenever he could catch a glimpse of the woman or have a word with her. This always annoyed her and also struck a sudden, sharp fear into her [334]heart. His appearance was always unexpected, and he was always accompanied by that intense, passionate dark look. Even so, he was a truly pure-hearted young man.

Afterward, when the baby was born, one of the child's eyes was marked by the color and fire of the dashing Spaniard's eyes, while its other eye was a calmish blue-gray eye. This was all the more remarkable as neither of the parents of the child had such eyes. Was it a case of maternal impression?

Afterward, when the baby was born, one of the child's eyes was marked by the color and intensity of the dashing Spaniard's eyes, while the other eye was a soft blue-gray. This was especially striking since neither of the child's parents had those eye colors. Was it a case of maternal impression?

Upon investigation I found that the grandparents of the baby's mother had just such eyes as the baby. The grandfather's were big, dark, flashing eyes, and the grandmother's the mild, blue-gray eyes. So 'bang!' went the theory of mental impression, and in its place came the physical law of reversion."

Upon investigation, I discovered that the baby's mother's grandparents had the same kind of eyes as the baby. The grandfather had large, dark, sparkling eyes, and the grandmother had gentle, blue-gray eyes. So 'bang!' went the theory of mental impression, and in its place came the physical law of reversion.

I do not wish to be misunderstood as claiming that a mother's condition during pregnancy has no effect on the child, and that she need therefore take no precautions and pay no particular attention to her health and her feelings. This is not so. But what I do want to convey is this: That if a mother's health during pregnancy is bad, if she is a prey to worry and anxiety, if she was subjected to great fright or to a shock, then the child's general health may suffer. It may be stillborn, or the mother may have a miscarriage. But it will not produce those specific marks, deformities and monstrosities which [335]are commonly supposed to be the results of maternal impressions.

I don't want to be misunderstood as saying that a mother's condition during pregnancy doesn't impact the child, or that she doesn't need to take any precautions or pay attention to her health and feelings. That's not true. What I want to express is this: If a mother's health during pregnancy is poor, if she's filled with worry and anxiety, or if she experiences great fear or shock, then the child's overall health might be affected. It could be stillborn, or she might have a miscarriage. However, it won't cause those specific marks, deformities, and abnormalities that are generally believed to result from maternal impressions. [335]

If I lay somewhat special stress upon the subject of maternal impressions, it is because I pity the poor mothers and want to spare them as much as possible unnecessary worry and anxiety. Besides I want them to believe in the truth and not in error.

If I emphasize the topic of maternal impressions, it’s because I feel for the mothers and want to save them from unnecessary worry and stress. Also, I want them to believe in what’s true, not in falsehoods.







Chapter Forty-eightToC

ADVICE TO THE MARRIED AND THOSE ABOUT TO BE

Marriage as an Ideal Institution—Monogamic Marriage—Some Reasons for Husbands' Deviations—Importance of First Few Weeks of Married Life—Necessity for Understanding at Beginning—Preventing and Breaking Habits—The Wife's Individuality—Husbands Who are Childish, Not Vicious—Wife's Interest in Husband's Affairs—The "Slob" Husband—The Well-groomed Husband—Bad Odor from the Mouth—Odors from Other Parts of the Body—Treatment for Bad Odor from Perspiration—A Beneficial Powder—Advice Regarding Flirting—Dainty Underwear—Fine External Clothes and Cheap and Soiled Underwear—Delicate Adjustments of Sex Act Required with Some Men—Wife Who Discusses Her Husband's Foibles—A Professional Secret—A Case of Temporary Impotence—The Wife's Indiscretion—The Disastrous Result—A Big Stomach—The Wife's Attitude Towards the Marital Relation—Behavior Preliminary to and During the Act—Congenital Frigidity—Prudish and Vicious Ideas About the Sex Act—Sexual Intercourse for Procreative Purposes Only—Fear of Pregnancy on the Part of the Wife—The Remedy—Other Causes—Wife who Makes too Frequent Demands—Sacrificing the Future to the Present—Esthetic Considerations.

Marriage as an Ideal Institution—Monogamous Marriage—Some Reasons for Husbands' Deviations—Importance of the First Few Weeks of Married Life—Need for Understanding at the Start—Preventing and Breaking Bad Habits—The Wife's Individuality—Childish Husbands, Not Vicious Ones—Wife's Interest in Husband's Affairs—The "Messy" Husband—The Well-groomed Husband—Bad Breath—Body Odors—Solutions for Sweaty Odors—A Helpful Powder—Flirting Advice—Nice Underwear—Stylish Outer Clothes with Cheap and Dirty Underwear—Sensitive Adjustments for Intimacy with Some Men—Wife Discussing Her Husband's Quirks—A Professional Secret—An Instance of Temporary Impotence—The Wife's Indiscretion—The Disastrous Outcome—A Big Belly—The Wife's View on Marriage—Behavior Before and During Intimacy—Congenital Frigidity—Prudish and Negative Views on Intimacy—Sex for Procreation Only—Wife's Fear of Pregnancy—The Solution—Other Factors—Wife Who Makes Too Many Demands—Sacrificing the Future for the Present—Aesthetic Considerations.


Whether marriage in its present form is an ideal institution destined to endure forever, whether it is in need of radical reforms before it can be considered ideal, or whether it has fundamental irremediable defects, are questions which we are not going [337]to discuss here. The fact is that at the present time the greatest part of the adult population of the world is married; and the part that isn't would like to be. And the greater part of civilized humanity living in a state of monogamic marriage, it behooves us to make the best of it, to get out of it the greatest amount of happiness that we can, obviate as much unhappiness as possible, and to do everything in our power to make it permanent. Separation or divorce are remedies of last resort, and people have recourse to them when they are at the end of their tether. But the proper thing to do is to avoid the necessity of having to have recourse to them. And I believe that a careful, thoughtful perusal of this chapter will help husband and wife to get along better, to avoid unnecessary friction and to retain the mutual physical and spiritual attraction which we call Love for a longer period than might otherwise be the case.

Whether marriage in its current form is an ideal institution meant to last forever, needs major reforms to be seen as ideal, or has deep, irreparable flaws, are questions we won’t discuss here. The reality is that right now, most adults in the world are married, and those who aren’t often wish they were. Since a large portion of civilized society is in monogamous marriages, we should make the most of it, striving for as much happiness as possible, reducing unhappiness, and doing everything we can to ensure its longevity. Separation or divorce should be last resorts, used only when people feel completely drained. The focus should be on preventing the need for either. I believe that a careful, thoughtful reading of this chapter will help couples get along better, avoid unnecessary conflicts, and maintain the mutual physical and emotional attraction we call love for a longer time than they might otherwise experience.

I have the confidence and listen to the intimate confessions of more men and woman probably than any other physician in America, or perhaps in the world. For reasons easily understood they tell me things which they would not think of telling to their regular physician. I have learned of many of the reasons, which in many families led first to a coolness, then to an estrangement, or to quarrels, to [338]separation and divorce. I know the first steps which in many instances draw the husband to another woman. And I wish to tell you, that while I firmly believe in the polygamous or rather varietist tendencies of the average man, nevertheless I am convinced that one of the great reasons why so many married men patronize prostitutes, or have mistresses or lady friends, is to be found in the wives themselves. Many wives drive their husbands to other women, and are alone responsible for their suffering, for the cooling of their husbands' affections, and perhaps even desertion. And in the following pages I will endeavor, as stated before, to point out some of the rocks and shoals on which the matrimonial bark is so often shattered, and to offer the wives some suggestions which will help them to retain their husbands' affections and perhaps even also their fidelity.

I have confidence and hear the private confessions of more men and women than probably any other doctor in America, or maybe even the world. For understandable reasons, they share things with me that they wouldn't dream of telling their regular doctor. I've discovered many of the reasons that in numerous families led to first a distance, then a separation, or to arguments, to [338] separation and divorce. I know the early signs that often lead a husband to another woman. And I want to say that while I strongly believe in the polygamous or rather variety-seeking nature of the average man, I'm also convinced that one of the main reasons so many married men visit prostitutes or have mistresses or female friends is rooted in their wives themselves. Many wives drive their husbands to other women, and are solely responsible for their suffering, the fading of their husbands' affections, and possibly even abandonment. In the following pages, I will attempt, as mentioned before, to highlight some of the challenges and pitfalls where marriage often falls apart, and to provide some advice to wives that may help them keep their husbands' affection and perhaps even their loyalty.

While the advice is intended primarily for wives, there will be found here and there a salutary piece of advice for husbands. Some of the advice is applicable to both partners, and as to those suggestions which concern the husband only—it will be a good thing for the wives to call their husbands' attention to them.

While the advice is mainly for wives, you'll find some helpful tips for husbands scattered throughout. Some of the advice applies to both partners, and for those suggestions that are specifically for husbands, it would be beneficial for wives to point them out to their husbands.

The first few weeks or the first few months are the most important in the life of a married couple. [339]The stability of the marriage, the future happiness, often depend upon the things which are done or left undone during the initial weeks of married life. A certain understanding must be reached from the very beginning. If your husband does certain things which displease you and which you know should not be done, it is best to say so at the very start. It is easier to prevent the establishment of a habit than to break a habit after it has been established.

The first few weeks or months are the most crucial in a married couple's life. [339]The stability of the marriage and future happiness often depend on what is done or not done during those early weeks. An understanding needs to be reached right from the start. If your husband does things that bother you and you know shouldn't happen, it's better to speak up right away. It's easier to stop a habit from forming than to break one once it's already established.

Retain Your Individuality. The first piece of advice I have to give you is: Retain your individuality. It is a trite but perfectly true observation that altogether too many men who during courtship were chivalry personified assume a dictatorial tone as soon as the knot has been tied. They think that the wife has actually ceased to exist as a separate human being, that she has been absorbed, and with the loss of her name she has lost all right to have her own opinions, her own tastes, and, of course, her own friends. Friends who are obnoxious to one of the marital partners one must give up sometimes; but do not permit your entire personality to be obscured. Explain to your husband that you are still an independent living human being. I do not say, you should at once start a fight. Nothing is more offensive to me than the militant, pugnacious woman, [340]who wears a chip on the shoulder and is continually ready to insist on her "rights." But with gentleness and firmness much can be accomplished. And you want to remember that many husbands act the way they do, not because they are vicious, but because they are stupid or childish. Sometimes it is mere thoughtlessness. They have been brought up wrongly, and some of them sincerely imagine that by repressing the wife's personality, by blotting it out, they are acting in her interest. "It is for her own good." A serious talk with a husband will sometimes have a wonderful effect. It may sometimes change entirely the current of his thoughts. Of course if the husband is a cad, a conceited fool, or a brute, you can do nothing with him; but fortunately not all husbands belong to those categories.

Keep Your Individuality. The first piece of advice I want to give you is: Keep your individuality. It's a common but completely true observation that way too many men who were the picture of chivalry during courtship take on a controlling attitude as soon as the wedding is over. They act like their wife has stopped being a separate person, that she has been absorbed into their life, and with the loss of her name, she has lost all right to have her own opinions, preferences, and, of course, her own friends. You may have to let go of friends that one of you doesn’t get along with, but don’t let your whole personality be overshadowed. Let your husband know that you are still an independent individual. I’m not saying you should start a fight right away. Nothing is more off-putting to me than a combative, aggressive woman, [340] who always seems ready to demand her "rights." But with kindness and strength, a lot can be achieved. Keep in mind that many husbands behave this way, not because they’re mean, but because they’re clueless or immature. Sometimes it’s just thoughtlessness. They’ve been raised incorrectly, and some truly believe that by suppressing their wife’s personality, they’re doing it for her benefit. "It’s for her own good." A serious conversation with a husband can sometimes work wonders. It may completely change how he thinks. Of course, if your husband is a jerk, a self-centered fool, or a brute, there’s not much you can do about it; but thankfully, not all husbands fall into those categories.

Interest in Husband's Affairs. Be interested in your husband's affairs. No matter what your husband's occupation may be, you should possess enough intelligence to be able to understand what he is doing. It is almost unbelievable how little some wives know about their husband's profession or work. It is a bad thing when strange women understand your husband's work better than you do, and when he finds in them more intelligent and more sympathetic listeners. He may go to them for sympathy. If your husband is a scientist or a [341]research worker or a professional man it is not necessary that you be familiar with all the details of his work, but with the general character you should be. And if you can be of assistance to him in his work, if it be only looking up references, compiling tables and statistics or merely typewriting, it will be appreciated by him, and will sometimes help to knit the bonds a bit closer.

Interest in Husband's Affairs. Take an interest in your husband's work. No matter what he does for a living, you should have enough understanding to know what he's involved in. It's surprising how little some wives know about their husband's job or profession. It's not a good sign if other women understand his work better than you do and he finds them to be more understanding and intelligent listeners. He might seek sympathy from them. If your husband is a scientist or a [341] research worker or a professional, you don't need to know every detail of his job, but you should understand the general nature of it. If you can help him with his work, even if it's just finding references, compiling statistics, or typing, he will appreciate it, and it can strengthen your bond.

There is another important reason for being interested in and understanding your husband's business. When the husband dies—and a man is not infrequently snatched away in the prime of youth and vigor—the wife is often left to the mercies of the cold world, without money and without a profession. If she understands the husband's business she can continue it and remain economically independent. This has reference not only to ordinary business, like stores or agencies, but to more or less specialized occupations, such for instance as publishing. We know the cases of two widows of publishers of medical journals. When their husbands died everybody was commiserating with them: what will they make a living from? But they understood the details of their husbands' business, and they kept right on. And now those journals are financially more successful than they were when the husbands were at the helm.

There’s another important reason to be interested in and understand your husband’s business. When a husband dies—and it's not uncommon for a man to be taken away in the prime of his life—the wife is often left to face the harsh realities of the world, without money and without a career. If she knows her husband’s business, she can carry it on and stay financially independent. This applies not just to regular businesses like stores or agencies, but also to more specialized fields, like publishing. We know of two widows of publishers of medical journals. When their husbands passed away, everyone was sympathetic, wondering how they would make a living. But they understood the ins and outs of their husbands’ business, and they continued it successfully. Now, those journals are financially thriving even more than when their husbands were in charge.

[342]Wife's Behavior Toward Sexual Relations. I am now coming to a delicate subject. But, delicate though it is, it must be dealt with unflinchingly, because it is probably responsible for more male infidelity than all other causes combined. I speak of the relation of the wife to her marital duties, in other words, to sexual relations. Too many women regard the sexual act as a nuisance, as an ordeal, as something disagreeable to get through with as quickly as possible; they regard the husband's demands in this line as an imposition, as unfair or even as brutal; and their behavior preliminary to and during the act is such as to cool the ardor of any refined and sensitive man. The reasons for this behavior on the part of many wives are manifold; this is not the place to consider them in detail. I will allude to them briefly. One great cause is congenital frigidity. The woman is cold, frigid, has no desire for sex relations and experiences no pleasure, no sensation from them. Such women are not to blame; they are to be pitied. But even they can behave so as not to repel their husbands. (See Chapter XLIII).

[342]Wife's Behavior Toward Sexual Relations. I'm now approaching a sensitive topic. But sensitive as it may be, it has to be addressed openly, as it likely causes more male infidelity than all other reasons combined. I'm talking about how a wife approaches her marital duties, specifically regarding sexual relations. Too many women see sex as a hassle, a chore, something unpleasant to get over with as quickly as possible; they view their husband's needs in this area as a burden, unjust, or even harsh, and their actions before and during the act can dampen the passion of any refined and sensitive man. The reasons for this behavior among many wives are various; this isn't the right time to explore them in depth. I'll mention them briefly. One major reason is congenital frigidity. The woman is cold, frigid, feels no desire for sexual relations, and gains no pleasure or sensation from them. Such women aren’t to be blamed; they should be pitied. But even they can act in ways that don't push their husbands away. (See Chapter XLIII).

Another great cause is the vicious, prudish bringing up, by which the sex act is regarded as something unclean, indecent, animal-like, brutal. Such Women need a good "talking-to," and if they are [343]only not natural born fools, one good explanation often fixes matters. On a par with this general prudishness is the infamous idea promulgated by a few semi-insane, mentally decrepit men and women, that sexual intercourse is for the purpose of propagation only. That only when a child is wanted is the relation permissible; at all other times it is a sin, an "act of prostitution," an offense in the eyes of God, etc., etc. Of course if the wife has such ideas the husband deserves little sympathy. A man should know what ideas the woman entertains whom he is going to make his wife and the mother of his children. But, unfortunately, this, the most important subject of sex and sexuality, is never touched upon by the engaged couple (it would be so indelicate!), and after they are married they often find themselves at opposite poles. Here also a good heart-to-heart talk will do a world of good. I have had several such cases where a little conversation or even a letter saved the couple from disruption.

Another major issue is the strict and prudish upbringing that leads people to see sex as something dirty, inappropriate, animalistic, or brutal. These women need a good "talking-to," and if they're not complete fools, one solid explanation often sorts things out. Alongside this general prudishness is the ridiculous idea pushed by a few semi-crazy, mentally troubled men and women that sex is only for the purpose of procreation. They believe that sexual relations are only acceptable when a child is wanted; at any other time, it’s a sin, an "act of prostitution," an offense in the eyes of God, and so on. Of course, if a wife holds such beliefs, the husband deserves little sympathy. A man should know what ideas the woman he is going to marry—and the mother of his children—has about these topics. Unfortunately, this crucial subject of sex and sexuality is never discussed by engaged couples (it would be too awkward!), and after they are married, they often find themselves at opposite ends of the spectrum. Here too, a sincere heart-to-heart conversation can work wonders. I’ve dealt with several cases where a simple chat or even a letter saved the couple from breaking apart.

In many cases the cause of refusal is fear of pregnancy. In this case the wife is right. But the remedy is simple: give her full instruction in the use of contraceptive measures. Other causes are: excessive masturbation, vaginismus, local malformation, inflammation, etc. But whatever the causes [344]of the wife's "bad behavior" may be, they are all amenable to treatment. Some need medical treatment, some psychic treatment, and some nothing but just a common-sense, heart-to-heart talk.

In many cases, the reason for refusal is fear of getting pregnant. In this situation, the wife is justified. But the solution is straightforward: provide her with complete guidance on using contraceptive methods. Other reasons include excessive masturbation, vaginismus, local abnormalities, inflammation, and so on. However, regardless of the reasons for the wife's "bad behavior," they can all be addressed. Some require medical treatment, some need psychological support, and others only need a straightforward, heartfelt conversation.

And I would emphasize: Do not repel your husbands when they ask for sexual favors—at least do not repel them too often. Households in which relations are had rather frequently and in which the wives lend their full and eager participation are happier households than those in which the sexual act is indulged in rarely, and with grumbling and side-remarks on the part of the wife.

And I want to stress: Don't push your husbands away when they ask for intimacy—at least, don't do it too often. Households where sexual relations happen more frequently and where wives are fully and willingly involved are happier than those where intimacy is rare and accompanied by complaints or sarcastic comments from the wife.

But of course you should not go to the other extreme either. You should not make too frequent demands upon your husband. With a man the act means a good deal more than it does with a woman; it entails a great deal more of physical and mental exhaustion, and a wife who is unreasonable in this respect is sowing the seeds of discord and unhappiness. She is sacrificing the future to the present. The husband is apt to become afflicted with satiety or impotence—and the wife may have to lead a life of continence for much longer than she would have had to if she had been moderate. In no department of life is moderation so important as in sex life. Non-use, insufficient use and excessive use are all bad. A mutually joyful, eager and moderately [345]frequent participation in the sexual act will contribute most to a happy and long life.

But of course, you shouldn’t go to the other extreme either. You shouldn’t make too many demands on your husband. For a man, the act means a lot more than it does for a woman; it involves a lot more physical and mental exhaustion, and a wife who is unreasonable in this regard is planting the seeds of discord and unhappiness. She is sacrificing the future for the present. The husband may end up feeling unsatisfied or incapable—and the wife might have to live a life of restraint for much longer than she would have if she had been more moderate. In no area of life is moderation as crucial as in sexual relationships. Not using it enough, using it too little, or using it too much are all harmful. A mutually enjoyable, enthusiastic, and moderately frequent participation in sexual activity will contribute most to a happy and long life.

Dainty Underwear. This may be considered too delicate or too trifling a subject to discuss in an important sex book. But nothing is too delicate or too trifling that concerns human happiness, and you will believe me if I tell you that nice underwear or dainty lingerie plays a very important rôle in marital life. And every married woman should have as fine and as dainty underwear as she can possibly afford. A fine or elaborate nightgown may be more important than an expensive skirt or hat. Unfortunately too many women ignore this fact. Externally they will be well dressed, while their petticoats, drawers and undershirts will be of the commonest quality and of questionable freshness and immaculateness. And if anything in a woman's toilet should be immaculately fresh and clean it is, I emphasize, her underwear. Silk and lace and delicate batiste should be preferred, if they can be afforded, and attention should be paid to the color. As a rule, a delicate pink is the color that most men prefer. The sex act with some men requires the most delicate adjustments, and the condition of the underwear may determine the man's desire and ability or inability to accomplish the act. I therefore repeat: whether you are newly married or have been [346]married a quarter of a century, be sure that your underwear is the very best that your means will allow you, and that it is always sweet, fresh and dainty. It will help you to retain the affection of your husband. I know that some allegedly wise ones will scoff at this statement. They may say that an affection that may be influenced by the kind and condition of underwear is not worth having or retaining. But what do these wise ones know! What do they know of the numerous subtle influences which gradually either strengthen or undermine our affections? Follow this advice and you will be grateful.

Dainty Underwear. This might seem too delicate or insignificant a topic to bring up in a serious sex book. But nothing is too delicate or too trivial when it comes to human happiness, and you'll agree with me when I say that nice underwear or pretty lingerie plays a significant role in married life. Every married woman should have the finest and most delicate underwear she can afford. A beautiful or fancy nightgown can be more important than an expensive skirt or hat. Unfortunately, too many women overlook this fact. They may look stylish on the outside, while their lingerie, panties, and undershirts are of the most basic quality and may not even be fresh or clean. If anything in a woman's wardrobe should be impeccably fresh and clean, it is, I stress, her underwear. Silk, lace, and soft batiste are preferred if they're within budget, and attention should be given to color. Generally, a soft pink is the color that most men like best. The act of intimacy with some men requires the most delicate adjustments, and the state of the underwear could influence a man's desire and capability to engage in the act. Therefore, I emphasize: whether you’re newly married or have been [346]married for twenty-five years, make sure your underwear is the best you can afford, and that it’s always clean, fresh, and delicate. This will help you keep your husband’s affection. I know that some self-proclaimed wise people will laugh at this advice. They might argue that an affection swayed by the type and condition of underwear isn’t worth having or keeping. But what do these so-called wise people really know? What do they understand about the many subtle influences that can either strengthen or erode our affections? Follow this advice, and you'll be thankful.

Do Not Offend Against Esthetics. Some women think that because they are married to their husbands they owe the latter no esthetic consideration. Things that they would be horrified to let a stranger see they do before their husband's eyes without hesitation. For instance, not to beat about the bush, though the subject is not a pleasant one, they will urinate in their husbands' presence, or they will let him see their soiled menstrual napkins, etc. Some husbands may not mind it; but some men are very sensitive—men on the whole are more esthetic than women—and an indifference towards the wife may have its origin in some vulgar or unesthetic procedure on the wife's part. The sexual act, as mentioned before, is a very delicate mechanism, and it [347]is very easy to disarrange it. The act of micturition before the man is known in many instances to have instantly abolished the man's sexual desire which was present before. And a man told me that because he noticed in a closet a lot of rags soiled with menstrual blood he was unable to enjoy relations with his wife for several months. You may think that these are all small things, but life is made up of little things, and many a married life went smash on account of disregarding the little things.

Don't Disrespect Aesthetics. Some women believe that because they are married, they no longer need to consider their husband's sense of aesthetics. They do things in front of their husbands that they would be mortified to show a stranger. For example, to be straightforward, even though it's an unpleasant topic, they will urinate in front of their husbands or let him see their used menstrual products, etc. Some husbands might not mind this; however, many men are quite sensitive—men, in general, are more aware of aesthetics than women—and a lack of regard from the wife may stem from some crude or aesthetically unpleasing behavior on her part. The act of sex, as previously mentioned, is a very delicate process, and it's [347]easy to upset it. Urinating in front of a man has, in many cases, instantly killed his sexual desire that was there before. One man told me that after he saw a bunch of rags stained with menstrual blood in a closet, he couldn't enjoy intimacy with his wife for several months. You may think these are minor issues, but life is composed of small details, and many marriages have fallen apart because of neglecting those little things.

A High Stomach. Avoid if you possibly can a high stomach, or a big stomach, or what we call in technical language a pendulous abdomen. Nothing is more fatal to woman's beauty—and to man's love—than a big stomach, and particularly a hang-down stomach. It at once takes away her youthfulness and makes her matronly—and matronliness is fatal to romance. It is not so much general stoutness that is objected to—some men, as is well known, prefer plump, stout women. And there are some savage tribes in which the preference is given to obese women with enormous abdomens, but this is not the case with the Caucasian race—not in civilized countries, at any rate, and surely not in the United States. First, reduce your carbohydrates, use massage and hydrotherapy, walk for hours at a time, but reduce your big abdomen—or, still [348]better, don't let it get big. Prevention here, as elsewhere, is much better than cure.

A High Stomach. If you can, avoid having a high stomach, a big stomach, or what we technically refer to as a sagging abdomen. Nothing is more damaging to a woman's beauty—and a man's attraction—than a big stomach, especially a droopy one. It instantly ages her and makes her look matronly—and matronliness is detrimental to romance. It's not necessarily general fullness that's a problem—some men, as is well known, prefer curvy, fuller-figured women. There are even some primitive tribes that favor obese women with large bellies, but that's not the case for Caucasian culture—not in civilized societies, at least, and definitely not in the United States. First, cut down on carbohydrates, use massage and hydrotherapy, walk for hours on end, but work on reducing your belly—or better yet, [348] prevent it from getting big in the first place. Prevention here, as in other areas, is much better than treatment.

Bad Odor from the Mouth. I know of no other physical ailment which is so dangerous, so fatal to the permanency of the love relation as is a strong, offensive odor from the mouth. As a noxious gas blights a delicate plant, so will a strong bad odor blight the delicate plant of love. Yes, a strong malodorous whiff will cool the most ardent passion. The public would be astounded if it knew how many cases of separation and divorce are due to nothing else but a bad odor from the mouth. Therefore, if you happen to suffer from this unfortunate ailment, lose no time in applying to a competent physician, and do not tire of treating yourself, no matter how irksome and time-consuming the treatment may be, until you are completely cured. It is important to your happiness.

Bad Odor from the Mouth. I don’t know of any other physical issue that is as harmful, as destructive to the longevity of a romantic relationship as a strong, unpleasant smell from the mouth. Just like a harmful gas can damage a delicate plant, a strong bad odor can ruin the fragile connection of love. Yes, a bad smell can cool even the hottest passion. People would be shocked if they knew how many separations and divorces happen solely because of bad breath. So, if you struggle with this unfortunate problem, don’t waste time—see a qualified doctor. Keep working on your treatment, no matter how annoying or time-consuming it is, until you are completely free of it. Your happiness depends on it.

Odors from Other Parts of Body. Odors from other parts of the body should be conspicuous by their absence. Normally no artificial aids are needed. Frequent bathing and general cleanliness are alone sufficient. The natural feminine odor—odor feminae—is pleasant, attractive and needs no disguise. But where an unpleasant odor from the genitals, feet or armpits is present the proper treatment should be applied, and in such cases the use [349]of a delicate perfume, sachet or scented talcum powder, is quite permissible. Not only permissible but advisable.

Body Odors. Odors from other areas of the body should be noticeably absent. Usually, no artificial products are necessary. Regular bathing and basic cleanliness are enough. The natural feminine scent—odor feminae—is pleasant, appealing, and doesn't need masking. However, if there's an unpleasant odor coming from the genitals, feet, or armpits, appropriate treatment should be taken, and in such cases, using a light perfume, sachet, or scented talcum powder is completely acceptable. Not just acceptable, but recommended.

A very good treatment for perspiration and bad odor from the feet is the following: bathe the feet night and morning in a basin of water to which has been added an ounce (two tablespoonfuls) of formaldehyde solution. Dry carefully, and then rub in well the following powder. It is simple, cheap and efficient:

A great way to deal with sweaty feet and unpleasant odor is this: soak your feet in a basin of water mixed with an ounce (two tablespoons) of formaldehyde solution, both morning and night. Dry your feet thoroughly, and then apply the following powder well. It's straightforward, affordable, and effective:

Salicylic acid one dram
Boric acid one ounce
Dried alum two ounces
Talcum four ounces

A little of the powder should be shaken into the stockings every morning, and the stockings should be changed very frequently, once or twice a day. This powder is also efficient against perspiration and bad odor from the armpits.

A small amount of powder should be sprinkled into the stockings every morning, and the stockings should be changed often, once or twice a day. This powder is also effective against sweat and bad odor from the armpits.

I am not giving any treatment for bad odor from the mouth, for this condition may be due to a great variety of causes. The cause may reside in the nose; it may reside in the mouth, decaying teeth, throat, tonsils. It may be due to a bad stomach, to some disease of the lungs, etc. Sometimes it is due [350]to overeating. What would be of value in one condition might be useless in another. The right thing, therefore, is to go to a competent physician, have him find the cause of your trouble and outline the proper treatment.

I’m not providing any treatment for bad breath because this issue can stem from many different causes. It could come from the nose, the mouth, decaying teeth, the throat, or tonsils. It might be linked to stomach problems, lung diseases, etc. Sometimes, it’s simply because of overeating. What works for one cause might not help with another. The best course of action is to see a qualified doctor, have them identify the source of your problem, and recommend the appropriate treatment.

Leucorrhea. Some men find themselves entirely unable to have sexual relations with a woman whom they know is suffering with leucorrhea. The mere knowledge of the fact takes away their ability to perform the act. It renders them impotent. It disgusts them, and disgust is fatal to sexual power. Only to-day I saw in my office a woman who anxiously begged for advice and treatment. She had been married five years. She has always had leucorrhea, from her fifteenth year as far as she remembers. Otherwise she did not suffer. For the first three years or so her married life has been a happy one. Then in an unfortunate moment she told her husband about her profuse leucorrhea, and instantly she noticed a change in him. He could not fully hide the expression on his face. And since then he ceased to have intercourse with her. He made a few attempts, but they turned out unsatisfactory to both, and she noticed that he was forcing himself, doing it against his will. She took some patent medicines and went to one doctor, but without any results. Now, unless she could be cured, [351]she feared her husband would demand a separation or a divorce. If you have leucorrhea treat it. And remember you need not initiate your husband in all your unesthetic ailments.

Leucorrhea. Some men find themselves completely unable to engage in sexual relations with a woman they know is suffering from leucorrhea. Just knowing about it takes away their ability to perform. It makes them impotent. It disgusts them, and disgust is fatal to sexual desire. Just today, I saw a woman in my office who was anxiously seeking advice and treatment. She had been married for five years. She has always had leucorrhea, since she was fifteen, as far as she can remember. Otherwise, she had no issues. The first few years of her marriage were happy. Then, during an unfortunate moment, she told her husband about her severe leucorrhea, and she immediately noticed a change in him. He couldn’t completely hide his reaction. Since then, he stopped having intercourse with her. He made a few attempts, but they were unsatisfying for both of them, and she realized he was doing it against his will. She tried some over-the-counter medications and visited one doctor, but nothing worked. Now, unless she can be cured, [351] she fears her husband will ask for a separation or divorce. If you have leucorrhea, get it treated. And remember, you don’t need to share every unpleasant detail with your husband.

Loyalty. Loyalty on the part of the wife is almost as important as fidelity. And it is in the highest degree disloyal for a wife to talk to her female or male friends about her husband's peculiarities, foibles or weaknesses. The husband's—as well, of course, as the wife's—peculiarities should be what we call a professional secret. Just as a physician is forbidden to talk to outsiders about his patient's troubles, so should a wife not talk about her husband, nor a husband about his wife. I know of a case in which a newly married husband was temporarily impotent (and it was the wife's fault, too). She spoke about it in the deepest confidence to a close girl friend of hers. The friend told it in deep confidence to another friend. And so it went around until it reached the husband's ears. From that moment he made no further attempt to have relations with his wife; a coolness resulted, which led to a separation, which still persists. The wife begged forgiveness, but he was unable to grant it—he felt so deeply hurt.

Loyalty. A wife's loyalty is nearly as important as her fidelity. It's extremely disloyal for a wife to discuss her husband's quirks, weaknesses, or shortcomings with her friends, whether they are male or female. Both a husband's and a wife's peculiarities should be treated as a professional secret. Just like a doctor cannot discuss a patient's issues with outsiders, a wife shouldn't talk about her husband, nor should a husband talk about his wife. I know of a situation where a newly married husband was temporarily unable to perform (and it was partly the wife's fault too). She confided in a close girlfriend about it. That friend then shared it with another friend, and so on, until it got back to the husband. From that point on, he stopped trying to be intimate with his wife; a distance developed that eventually led to their separation, which still lasts. The wife pleaded for forgiveness, but he couldn't give it—he felt too deeply wounded.

Flirting. Do not flirt. Men are apt to misunderstand you, and you are apt to get the reputation of [352]a loose woman without in any way having deserved it. I do not say that you should always wear a forbidding expression, and should scowl at people who dare to smile at you or otherwise pay homage to your feminine charms. But there is a difference between a friendly expression and flirting. However, when your husband begins to neglect you, then a mild flirtation may be justifiable. It will always do your husband good to know that there are other males in the world beside him, and that some of these males find interest in the female whom he considers his permanent and exclusive property.

Flirting. Don't flirt. Men are likely to get the wrong idea, and you might end up with a reputation as [352]a promiscuous woman, even if you haven't done anything to deserve it. I’m not saying you should always look unfriendly or frown at anyone who dares to smile at you or compliment your looks. But there's a distinct line between being friendly and flirting. That said, if your husband starts to ignore you, a little flirting might be acceptable. It will always be good for your husband to realize there are other guys in the world, and that some of them find your charm appealing, even if he sees you as his own.

Slovenly Husbands. Don't let your husband become a slob. That is just what I mean. It is no use mincing words. Some husbands have never acquired the habit—or if they have acquired it they quickly lost it—of regarding their wives as ladies. "She is not a lady, she is only my wife," is a well-known joke, but some men take it not as a jest. Some men think that before their wives they can be as slovenly and unclean as they please. Give your husband to understand that cleanliness and freshness is not a "sex-limited" attribute, and just as a husband wants his wife to be clean and dainty and well-groomed, so a wife may enjoy the same qualities in her husband. Some women are very fastidious, and while they may say nothing to their [353]husbands for fear of irritating them, they may think a good deal.

Slovenly Husbands. Don't let your husband become a slob. That's exactly what I mean. There's no need to sugarcoat it. Some husbands never pick up the habit—or if they have, they quickly let it go—of treating their wives with respect. "She’s not a lady, she’s just my wife" is a common joke, but some men take it seriously. Some men think they can be as messy and unkempt as they want in front of their wives. Make it clear to your husband that being clean and fresh isn't just a "woman's thing," and just as husbands want their wives to be clean, elegant, and well-groomed, wives appreciate those same traits in their husbands. Some women are quite particular, and while they may not say anything to their [353]husbands for fear of upsetting them, they may think a lot about it.

Carrying Life Insurance. Every husband should carry some life insurance—as much as he conveniently can. This should be the husband's most pleasant duty, particularly so when the wife has no profession of her own and there are small children to bring up. The lack of consideration, the thoughtlessness—I would call it dishonesty—on the part of many husbands who claim to love their wives is simply heart-breaking. Who of us does not know of cases of refined wives with children left absolutely penniless and forced into wage slavery or even into menial service by the negligence of their husbands? Such things happened even to wives whose husbands were making from three to ten thousand a year. Thoughtlessness, carelessness, procrastination—and then it was too late. There is not a man who makes as little as twenty dollars a week who cannot carry some insurance. I was once poor, very poor. And the terrifying thought, What would happen to my wife and two children if I should be taken off suddenly? gave me many a troubled and sleepless night. And when I took out a thousand dollars insurance I felt some relief. But I felt it was inadequate. I therefore made a supreme effort and soon took an additional ten thousand dollars. [354]And I assure you that the annual premium of two hundred and eighty-six dollars was a terrible burden on me. There were times when I felt as if I had to give it up. But I deprived myself of many necessities (there was no question of luxuries) and I paid my premiums regularly. But in compensation I had restful nights. It was soothing to know that if I should be taken away in my earliest youth my equally young wife and two little babies would not be left penniless. I verily believe that an adequate life insurance prolongs a person's life, because it removes the worry about the future of the wife and children.

Carrying Life Insurance. Every husband should have some life insurance—whatever he can manage. This should be an enjoyable responsibility for him, especially when his wife doesn’t have a job and there are young kids to raise. It’s heartbreaking to see the lack of thoughtfulness from many husbands who say they love their wives. How many of us know of cases where refined wives with children were left completely broke and had to struggle in low-paying jobs or even worse due to their husbands’ negligence? This has happened to wives whose husbands earned between three to ten thousand a year. Thoughtlessness, carelessness, procrastination—and then it’s too late. There's not a man earning even twenty dollars a week who can't afford some insurance. I was once very poor, and the terrifying thought, What would happen to my wife and two kids if I suddenly passed away? caused me many sleepless nights. When I got a thousand dollars in insurance, I felt some relief, but it didn’t seem enough. So I made a strong effort and soon added another ten thousand dollars. [354] I can tell you that the annual premium of two hundred and eighty-six dollars was a heavy burden for me. There were times when I thought I might have to give it up. But I sacrificed many necessities (luxuries were out of the question) and paid my premiums consistently. In return, I enjoyed restful nights. It was comforting to know that if I were to pass away in my youth, my equally young wife and two little kids wouldn’t be left without support. I truly believe that having adequate life insurance can extend a person’s life, as it relieves the worry about what will happen to their wife and children.

I repeat, every husband should carry some life insurance. And the habit of the bridegroom presenting the bride with a substantial life insurance policy is a very good one. It is not only a financial protection to the wife; it is also more or less a guarantee of the husband's fair health.

I’ll say it again, every husband should have some life insurance. The practice of the groom giving the bride a solid life insurance policy is a great idea. It not only provides financial security for the wife; it also serves as somewhat of a reassurance about the husband’s good health.

Making a Will. Another point. Every husband should make a will. This is a delicate point about which most wives would hesitate to speak to their husbands, but the husband should attend to the matter himself. A will doesn't shorten anybody's life, but is very convenient in case of a sudden taking off. This is, of course, particularly important if there is some property. If the husband dies without [355]a will, there is endless trouble and red tape for the wife. An executor has to be appointed, she has to give bonds, etc., etc. If the husband leaves a will making his wife sole executrix, without a bond, all trouble is avoided. I assume, of course, that the husband has perfect confidence in his wife's wisdom and integrity. If he has not and there are children, it is just as well to designate some outside executor or executors. But whichever may be the case, it is a good and sensible thing always to have a will properly made out and witnessed.

Making a Will. Another thing to consider. Every husband should have a will. This is a sensitive topic that most wives might hesitate to bring up, but it's important for the husband to handle it himself. A will doesn’t shorten anyone’s life, but it’s really helpful in case something unexpected happens. This is especially crucial if there's any property involved. If the husband passes away without [355] a will, it creates endless hassle and bureaucracy for the wife. An executor needs to be appointed, and she has to secure bonds, and so on. If the husband leaves a will naming his wife as the sole executrix, without the need for a bond, all those issues can be avoided. I assume, of course, that the husband has complete trust in his wife's judgment and honesty. If he doesn’t, and there are children, it might be better to choose an outside executor or executors. But in any case, it’s wise and sensible to always have a will properly prepared and signed.







Chapter Forty-nineToC

A RATIONAL DIVORCE SYSTEM

A Rational Divorce System—Storms and Squalls—Two Sides of the Divorce Question—Outside Help and Marital Tangles—A Husband who was a Paragon of Virtue—The Case of the Sweet Wife—The Proper Untangling of Domestic Tangles.

A Rational Divorce System—Storms and Conflicts—Two Perspectives on Divorce—Outside Support and Relationship Issues—A Husband who was a Model of Integrity—The Case of the Lovely Wife—The Correct Resolution of Domestic Issues.


Of course, I am in favor of a rational divorce system. The difficulties, the obstacles, the expense, with which divorce is now surrounded in most civilized countries is simply disgraceful. Make marriage harder and divorce easier, has always been my motto. When life together becomes unbearable then it is better for both husband and wife to cut the tie and to get divorced. Divorce is preferable to separation, because both spouses may be able to lead a new and happier life. Where there are no children to be taken care of a simple declaration of husband and wife repeated perhaps after a lapse of three or six months should be quite sufficient for the granting of a divorce. Where there are children the state should make sure that they will be properly taken care of before a divorce is granted. Where only one party demands a divorce the case should be [357]carefully studied by a commission which should include in its personnel physicians and psychologists; and adultery should most certainly not be the only cause for divorce.

Of course, I support a fair divorce system. The challenges, barriers, and costs associated with divorce in most developed countries are just unacceptable. My philosophy has always been to make marriage more challenging and divorce easier. When living together becomes unbearable, it’s better for both partners to end the relationship and get divorced. Divorce is better than separation because both partners can move on to lead a new and happier life. When there are no children involved, a simple statement from the husband and wife, maybe repeated after three or six months, should be enough for a divorce to be granted. When children are involved, the state should ensure they are well cared for before a divorce is finalized. If only one partner is seeking a divorce, the case should be [357]thoroughly reviewed by a commission that includes doctors and psychologists; and adultery absolutely should not be the only reason for divorce.

Yes, I am for a sensible, rational and easy system of divorce. But I would always recommend care and caution. "Go slow" should be the guiding motto of husband and wife in such cases. There are periods in a married couple's life when further living together seems unthinkable; and still a month or two or a year passes and the husband and wife live happily together and cannot believe that there was ever any friction between them. The couples are very few, indeed, who never went through any squalls or storms, whose lives were not darkened by disagreements, quarrels and apparently irreconcilable antagonisms. But after the storm the sun shone brightly again, and the quarrels were followed by harmony and peace. After that love was intensified. Were divorce a simple matter, a mere matter of declaration, many couples who live now in harmony would have been divorced—to their great regret perhaps.

Yes, I support a sensible, rational, and straightforward approach to divorce. However, I would always advocate for care and caution. "Take it slow" should be the motto guiding couples in these situations. There are times in a marriage when living together seems impossible; yet, after a month or two or even a year, couples often find themselves happily together, unable to believe there was ever any conflict. Very few couples have never experienced turbulence or storms, whose lives haven't been clouded by disagreements, arguments, and seemingly unresolvable conflicts. But after the storm, the sun shines brightly again, and the fights are followed by harmony and peace. After that, love deepens. If divorce were as simple as just making a declaration, many couples who are currently living in harmony might have ended their marriages—perhaps to their great regret.

Yes, there are two sides to the divorce question. But I would summarize it as follows: Where there is a real incompatibility of characters, where there is no love and no respect, then the sooner the couple [358]is divorced the better, and not only for them but for the children also, if there are any. An atmosphere of hatred and mutual contempt is not a healthy atmosphere for the growing children. But where there is merely irritability, outbreaks of temper, or disagreements which if analyzed can be seen to be due to temporary and remediable causes, then "Go slow," "Don't hurry," should be your motto. There will always be time to get a divorce. While if a divorce has been obtained, even if you regret it, you will most likely stay divorced. Many divorced couples, I imagine, would remarry, if they were not ashamed. They fear it would make them ridiculous—and it would—in their friends' eyes.

Yes, there are two sides to the divorce question. But I would sum it up like this: When there’s a genuine incompatibility of personalities, when there’s no love and no respect, the sooner the couple [358]gets divorced, the better for everyone involved, including the kids, if there are any. Being in an environment filled with hatred and mutual disdain isn’t healthy for kids. However, if it’s just irritability, occasional outbursts, or disagreements that can be traced back to temporary and fixable issues, then "Take it slow," "Don’t rush," should be your approach. There will always be time to get a divorce. Once you’ve gone through with it, even if you regret it, chances are you’ll stay divorced. Many divorced couples, I think, would remarry if they weren’t embarrassed. They worry it would make them look foolish—and it probably would—in their friends' eyes.


Outsiders in Domestic Tangles

If you have a disagreement with your husband, try to straighten out the tangle yourself. Don't call in outside help. You will regret it. A stranger's paws are too coarse and too unsympathetic to meddle with the delicate adjustments which constitute marital life, and after you have gotten over your disagreement and are again living harmoniously you will be ashamed to look that third party in the face, and you will probably bear a grudge against him—or her.

If you have a disagreement with your husband, try to work it out yourself. Don't seek outside help. You'll regret it. An outsider's involvement can be clumsy and lacking understanding when it comes to the sensitive dynamics of marriage. Once you’ve resolved your issues and are back to living harmoniously, you'll feel embarrassed to face that third party, and you might end up holding a grudge against them.

Altogether outsiders are not fit to mix in the [359]internal differences between husband and wife. It is absolutely impossible for a stranger to know just where the trouble is and who the guilty party is. Sometimes there is no guilty party. Both husband and wife may be right; they may both be lovely people and still together they may form an incompatible, explosive mixture. And then again the party that to outsiders may seem the angelic one may in reality be the devilish one. It is a well-known fact that people who to the outside world may seem the personification of honor and good nature may be very devils at home. I have long ago given up not only meddling in, but even judging, domestic disharmonies. For it is almost impossible for an outsider to judge justly. I knew a husband who was considered a paragon of virtue. And when a clash came between him and his wife everybody was inclined to blame the wife. But it came out later that the husband had certain ways about him which made the wife's life a very torture. And vice versa. I know of another case where the wife was considered the sweetest thing in the world. She had nice ways about her, but she disliked her husband and made his life a hell. With genuine chivalry he bore everything, believing that it was a man's duty to bear his cross. She was unfaithful to him, but she was so clever and cunning that neither he nor [360]anybody else suspected it. The fact became painfully patent to him, when on one of the rare occasions that they came together she infected him with a venereal disease, which incapacitated him for a long time. Nobody knew why he insisted upon a separation, and everybody, with the exception of his physician and perhaps one or two others, was blaming him for an unfeeling brute.

Altogether, outsiders shouldn't get involved in the internal issues between a husband and wife. It's totally impossible for someone who isn't part of it to really understand the problems and figure out who's at fault. Sometimes, there isn't even a guilty party. Both the husband and the wife might be right; they could both be great people, yet together they create an incompatible, explosive situation. And sometimes the person who seems innocent to outsiders might actually be the one causing trouble. It's a well-known fact that individuals who appear to embody honor and kindness in public can be quite the opposite at home. I've long since stopped meddling in or judging domestic conflicts because it's nearly impossible for an outsider to make a fair assessment. I knew a husband who was seen as a model of virtue. When he clashed with his wife, everyone tended to blame her. But later, it turned out that the husband had certain traits that made the wife's life miserable. The opposite can happen too. I know of another case where the wife was thought to be the sweetest person alive. She had charming behaviors, but she didn't like her husband and made his life terrible. He endured everything with genuine chivalry, believing it was a man's responsibility to bear his cross. She cheated on him, but she was so clever and manipulative that neither he nor anyone else noticed. It became painfully clear to him when, on one of their rare occasions together, she gave him a sexually transmitted disease that made him unable to function for a long time. No one understood why he insisted on a separation, and everyone, except for his doctor and maybe a couple of others, blamed him for being an unfeeling brute.

I will therefore repeat that as a general thing domestic tangles should be untangled by the tanglers themselves. It is not safe to call in outsiders—relatives or friends; they are apt to make the tangle more tangled, and, what is more, they are quite likely to put the blame on the innocent party, and bestow upon the guilty party the Montyon prize for virtue and gentleness.

I want to emphasize that, generally speaking, personal issues should be handled by the people involved. It's not a good idea to involve outsiders—relatives or friends; they often end up making things more complicated and are likely to shift blame onto the innocent person while rewarding the guilty one with undeserved praise for being kind and gentle.







Chapter FiftyToC

WHAT IS LOVE?

Is Love Definable?—Raising a Corner of the Veil—Two Opinions of Love—The First Opinion: Sexual Intercourse and Love—The Second Opinion—The Grain of Truth in Each—The Truth Concerning Love—Foundation of Love—Sexual Attraction and Love—The Frigid Woman and Her Husband—Puzzling Cases of Love—The Paradox—Blindness of Love and the Penetrating Vision of Love—Limits of Homeliness—Physical Aversion and Genesis of Love—Mating in the Animal Kingdom—Mating in Low Races—Love in People of High Culture—Difference in Love of Savage and Man of Culture—Distinctions Between Loves—Varieties of Love and Varieties of Men—"Love" Without Sexual Desire—Refraining and Wanting—Cause of Love at First Sight—"Magnetic Forces" and Love at First Sight—The Pathological Side—Differentiation of Phases of Love—Infatuation—Difference Between "Infatuation" and "Being in Love"—Sexual Satisfaction and Infatuation—Sexual Satisfaction and Love—Infatuation Mistaken for Love—Love the Most Mysterious of Human Emotions—Great Love and Supreme Happiness.

Is Love Definable?—Peeking Behind the Curtain—Two Views on Love—The First View: Sexual Activity and Love—The Second View—The Truth in Each—The Reality of Love—The Basis of Love—Sexual Attraction and Love—The Cold Woman and Her Partner—Confusing Cases of Love—The Paradox—The Blindness of Love and Its Clear-Sightedness—The Limits of Attractiveness—Physical Aversion and the Birth of Love—Mating in the Animal World—Mating in Unsophisticated Societies—Love Among Cultured People—Differences in Love Between Savages and Cultured Individuals—Distinctions in Types of Love—Different Forms of Love and Different Types of People—"Love" Without Sexual Attraction—Restraint and Desire—What Triggers Love at First Sight—"Magnetic Forces" and Love at First Sight—The Pathological Aspect—Differentiation of Love Phases—Infatuation—The Contrast Between "Infatuation" and "Being in Love"—Sexual Fulfillment and Infatuation—Sexual Fulfillment and Love—Infatuation Confused with Love—Love as the Most Enigmatic Human Emotion—Great Love and Ultimate Happiness.


I shall not attempt to give a definition, either brief or extensive, of Love. Many have tried and failed, and I shall not attempt the impossible. Nor shall I attempt to discuss Love in all its innumerable details.[9] To do so would alone require a book many times more voluminous than the one you have [362]before you. I shall, however, endeavor to raise a corner of the veil which surrounds this most mysterious, most baffling and most complex of all human emotions, so that you may get a glimpse into its intricate mechanism and perhaps understand what Love is in its essence at least.

I won't try to define Love, whether briefly or in detail. Many have attempted and failed, so I won’t take on the impossible. I also won’t cover all its countless aspects.[9] Doing that would require a book many times larger than the one you have [362] in front of you. However, I will try to lift a corner of the curtain that surrounds this most mysterious, perplexing, and complex of all human emotions, so you can catch a glimpse of its intricate workings and maybe understand what Love truly is, at least in essence.

Sexual and Platonic Love. There are two widely different, in fact diametrically opposite, opinions as to what constitutes Love. One opinion is that Love is sexual love, sexual attraction, sexual desire. To people holding this opinion love and sexual desire or "lust" are synonymous. And they laugh and sneer at any attempt to idealize love, to present it as something finer and subtler, let alone nobler, than mere sex attraction. The writer has heard one cynical woman—and more than one man—say: Love? There is no such a thing. Sexual intercourse is love, and that's all there is to it.

Sexual and Platonic Love. There are two very different, in fact completely opposite, views on what love really is. One view is that love is sexual love, sexual attraction, and sexual desire. For those who believe this, love and sexual desire or "lust" are the same thing. They mock and dismiss any effort to elevate love, or depict it as something more beautiful and complex, let alone more noble, than just sexual attraction. The writer has heard one cynical woman—and more than one man—say: Love? It doesn’t exist. Sexual intercourse is love, and that's all there is to it.

The other opinion is that Love, true love, ideal love, or, as it is sometimes called, sentimental love, or platonic love, has nothing to do with sexual desire, with sexual attraction. Indeed, people holding this opinion consider love and sexual attraction—or lust as they like to call the latter—as antithetical conceptions, as mutually antagonistic and exclusive.

The other view is that Love—true love, ideal love, or what’s sometimes referred to as sentimental love or platonic love—has nothing to do with sexual desire or sexual attraction. In fact, those who hold this view see love and sexual attraction—or lust, as they prefer to call it—as opposite ideas that are mutually exclusive and in conflict with each other.

Both opinions, as is often the case with extreme and one-sided opinions, are wrong. Both opinions [363]have a reason for their existence, because there is a grain of truth in both of them. But a grain of truth is not the whole truth, and if an opinion contains ninety-nine parts of untruth to one part of truth, then the effect of the opinion is practically the same as if it were all false.

Both opinions, like many extreme and one-sided views, are incorrect. Each opinion [363]has some reason for being, as there is a bit of truth in both. However, a bit of truth isn't the whole truth, and if an opinion has ninety-nine parts falsehood to just one part truth, then the overall impact of that opinion is almost as if it were entirely false.

Here is the truth, or at least what I think is the truth, as it appears to me after many years of thinking and many years of observing.

Here’s the truth, or at least what I believe is the truth, based on my years of thinking and observing.

Foundation of Love. The foundation, the basis of all love is sexual attraction. Without sexual attraction, in greater or lesser degree, there can be no love. Where the former is entirely lacking the latter can have no existence. This you may take as an axiom. Some may call it love, but on analyzing it you will find that it is no such thing. It may be friendship, it may be gratitude, it may be respect, it may be pity, it may be habit, it may even be a desire or a readiness to love or to be loved, but it is not love. Experience has proved it in thousands and thousands of sad cases. And the girl who marries a man who is physically repulsive to her, who possesses no physical sexual attraction for her, though she may experience for him all of the feelings mentioned above, namely, friendship, gratitude, respect and pity, is preparing for herself a joyless couch to sleep on. Unless, indeed, she happens to belong to [364]the class of women whom we call frigid, that is, if she is herself devoid of any sexual desire and feels no need of any sexual relations. Such a woman may be fairly or even quite happy with a husband who repels her physically, but whom she likes or respects. And what I said about the wife applies with still greater force to the husband. A man who marries a woman who is physically antipathetic to him is a criminal fool.

Foundation of Love. The foundation, the basis of all love is sexual attraction. Without sexual attraction, to some extent, there can be no love. When it’s completely absent, love cannot exist. You can consider this a basic truth. Some might call it love, but if you look closely, you’ll see that it isn’t. It might be friendship, gratitude, respect, pity, habit, or even a desire or readiness to love or be loved, but it’s not love. Experience has shown this in countless sad cases. And a girl who marries a man she finds physically repulsive, who has no sexual attraction for her, might experience all those feelings—friendship, gratitude, respect, and pity—but she is setting herself up for a joyless life. Unless, of course, she happens to belong to [364] the group of women we call frigid, meaning she has no sexual desire and doesn’t feel the need for sexual relations. Such a woman might be reasonably or even quite happy with a husband who she finds physically unappealing but whom she likes or respects. And what I said about the wife applies even more to the husband. A man who marries a woman he finds physically off-putting is a foolish man.

I repeat, sexual, physical attraction is the basis, the foundation of love. It is true we see certain cases of love which puzzle us. We cannot understand what "he" has seen in "her" or what "she" has seen in "him." But let us remember this paradox, which paradoxical though it be, is true nevertheless: Love is blind, but Love also sees acutely and penetratingly; it sees things which we who are indifferent cannot see. The blindness of Love helps her not to see certain defects which are clearly seen to everybody else; but, on the other hand, her penetrating vision helps her to see good qualities which are invisible to others. And a homely person may possess certain compensating physical qualities—such as passionate ardor or strong sexual power—which, render him or her irresistible to a member of the opposite sex.

I’ll say it again: sexual and physical attraction is the foundation of love. It’s true that we come across some love stories that confuse us. We can’t grasp what “he” saw in “her” or what “she” found in “him.” But let’s remember this paradox, which, although contradictory, is still true: Love is blind, but it also sees things very clearly and deeply; it notices things that we who are indifferent can’t see. The blindness of Love prevents it from noticing certain flaws that everyone else can see; however, its sharp vision allows it to recognize good qualities that others might miss. And an unattractive person might have some compensating physical traits—like intense passion or strong sexual appeal—that make them irresistible to someone of the opposite sex.

But homeliness, ugliness or deformity have their [365]limits, and I challenge anybody to bring forth an authenticated case in which a man fell in love with a woman—or vice versa—who had an enormous tumor on one side of the face, which made her look like a monstrosity, or whose nose was sunk in as a result of lupus or syphilis, or whose cheek was eaten away by cancer. Love under such circumstances is an absolute impossibility, because there is physical aversion here, and physical aversion is fatal to the genesis of love. A man who loved a woman may continue to love her after she has become disfigured by disease, but he cannot fall in love with such a woman.

But homeliness, ugliness, or deformity have their [365] limits, and I challenge anyone to provide a verified example of a man falling in love with a woman—or vice versa—who had a huge tumor on one side of her face, making her look like a monster, or whose nose was collapsed due to lupus or syphilis, or whose cheek was destroyed by cancer. Love in such situations is completely impossible because there is physical aversion, and physical aversion is detrimental to the genesis of love. A man who loved a woman might continue to love her after she has been disfigured by illness, but he cannot fall in love with a woman like that.

I will repeat, then, and I trust you will agree with me on this point: sexual attraction is the foundation of all love between the opposite sexes. Where sexual attraction is lacking you can give the feeling any other name you choose: it will not be love.

I’ll say it again, and I hope you'll agree with me on this: sexual attraction is the basis of all love between men and women. If there's no sexual attraction, you can call the feeling whatever you want, but it won't be love.

Other Requisites. But a foundation is not a whole structure. To insure the stability of a high intricate building we must give it a good solid foundation; but the foundation does not make the building. That still remains to be built. So sexual attraction is the foundation of all love, but it does not constitute love. Many more factors, many more wonderful stones are needed before the wonderful structure called love is brought into existence. This [366]wonderful structure sometimes goes up in the twinkling of an eye, as if by the touch of a magic wand—who has not seen or heard of instances of "love at first sight!"—but the rapidity of the growth of the structure called Love does not militate against our assertion that many stones, much variegated material, and a strong cement are needed for its completion. Fairies sometimes work very quickly.

Other Requisites. But a foundation alone isn't a complete structure. To ensure the stability of a tall, intricate building, we need a solid foundation; but the foundation itself doesn’t create the building. That still has to be constructed. Similarly, sexual attraction is the foundation of all love, but it does not define love. Many more elements, many more beautiful stones are necessary before the amazing structure known as love can be built. This [366]amazing structure can sometimes rise in the blink of an eye, as if by a magic spell—who hasn’t seen or heard of “love at first sight!”—but the rapid development of the edifice called Love doesn’t change the fact that many stones, a variety of materials, and strong bonding are needed for its completion. Fairies sometimes work very quickly.

A little thought will show clearly that Love is not merely sexual love, not merely a desire to gratify the sexual instinct. If love were merely sexual desire, then one member of the opposite sex, or at least one attractive member, would be as good as any other. And indeed in animals and in the lower races, where love as we understand it does not exist, this is the case. To a male dog any female dog is as good as another, and vice versa. Cats are not particular in the choice of their mates, nor are cows, horses, etc. And the same is true of the primitive savage races, and even among the lower uneducated classes of so-called civilized races. To the Hottentot, to the Australian bushman or to the Russian peasant one woman is as good as another. If the male of a low race has some preference, it will be in favor of the woman who happens to have a little property.

A little thought will make it obvious that love isn’t just about sexual attraction or fulfilling sexual desires. If love were simply about physical desire, then one person of the opposite sex—or at least one who is attractive—would be just as good as any other. In fact, in animals and among less developed human societies, this is often the case. For a male dog, any female dog is as good as another, and vice versa. Cats aren’t picky about their mates, nor are cows, horses, etc. This also holds true for primitive tribes and even among the less educated classes of supposedly civilized societies. To the Hottentot, the Australian bushman, or the Russian peasant, one woman is as good as another. If a man from a less developed society has any preference, it’s likely to be for the woman who has a bit of property.

In fact I make the assertion that real love, true [367]love, is a new feeling, a comparatively modern feeling, absent in the lower races and reaching its highest development only in people of high civilization, culture and education.

In fact, I assert that real love, true [367]love, is a new emotion, a relatively modern feeling, not found in less developed societies and reaching its peak only in individuals of advanced civilization, culture, and education.

The platitudinous objection might be raised that "human nature is human nature," that all our feelings are born with us, and as such are inherited, that they have been with us for millions of years and that we cannot possibly originate any entirely new feeling. True from a certain viewpoint. We cannot originate intellect either. The germ of intellect with all its potential possibilities was present in our most primitive tree-climbing ancestors. But as much difference as there is between the intellect of an Australian bushman and the intellect of a Spinoza, a Shakespeare, a Darwin, a Victor Hugo, a Goethe or a Gauss, so much difference is there between the love of a primitive savage and the love of the highly cultured modern man. The love or so-called love of the primitive or ignorant man (and woman) is a simple matter and is practically equivalent to a desire for sexual gratification. The love of the truly cultured and highly civilized man and woman, while still based on sexual attraction, is so complex and so dominating a feeling that it completely defies all analysis, all attempts at dissection, as it defies all attempts at synthesis, at artificial building up.

The common argument might be that "human nature is human nature," that all our emotions are innate and inherited, that they’ve been with us for millions of years, and we can’t possibly create any entirely new feelings. This is true from one perspective. We can’t create intellect either. The seed of intellect, with all its potential, was present in our earliest tree-climbing ancestors. But just as there is a vast difference between the intellect of an Australian bushman and that of a Spinoza, a Shakespeare, a Darwin, a Victor Hugo, a Goethe, or a Gauss, there is just as much difference between the love of a primitive person and the love of a highly cultured modern individual. The love, or what’s often called love, of primitive or uneducated people is straightforward and is essentially a longing for sexual pleasure. The love of truly cultured and highly civilized individuals, while still rooted in sexual attraction, is so complex and powerful that it completely escapes any analysis or dissection, just as it resists any attempts at synthesis or artificial construction.

[368]As previously stated, some writers attempt to make a clear distinction between sensual and sentimental love; many reams of paper have been used up in an endeavor to differentiate between one and the other; the first is called animal love or lust; the second pure love or ideal love; the first variety of love is said to be selfish, egotistic, the other—self-sacrificing, altruistic. These distinctions read very nicely, but they mean very little. There is no distinct line of demarkation between the two varieties of love, and one merges imperceptibly into the other. Most, if not all, of our apparently altruistic actions and feelings have an egotistic substratum; and the quality of the love depends upon the lover. In other words, there are not two separate, distinct varieties of love, but there are separate, distinct varieties of men. A fine and noble man will love finely and nobly; a coarse and brutal man will love coarsely and brutally. A man who is fine and noble may not love at all, but he cannot love coarsely and selfishly; and a coarse and brutal man can never love nobly and unselfishly. Which once more means: the difference is not inherent in the love, but in the lover.

[368]As mentioned before, some writers try to clearly separate sensual and sentimental love; a lot of paper has been used up trying to explain the difference between the two. The first is referred to as animal love or lust, while the second is considered pure love or ideal love. The first type is seen as selfish and egotistical, whereas the second is viewed as self-sacrificing and altruistic. These distinctions sound nice, but they don't really mean much. There isn't a clear line between the two types of love, and one gradually blends into the other. Most, if not all, of our seemingly selfless actions and feelings have an underlying selfish motive; the nature of the love depends on the person loving. In other words, there aren't two separate types of love; instead, there are different types of people. A kind and noble person will love in a kind and noble way; a coarse and brutal person will love in a coarse and brutal way. A fine and noble person might not love at all, but they can't love in a self-centered and coarse manner; on the other hand, a coarse and brutal person can never love in a noble or unselfish way. This means again: the difference lies not in the love itself, but in the person doing the loving.

But to say that a man may deeply love a woman and not have any sexual desire for her is nonsense. A man who loves a woman and does not want to possess her (to use the ugly ancient verb) does not [369]love her—or he is completely impotent. Whatever the feeling may be for her—it is not love. He may abstain from having sex relations with her if the circumstances are such that sex relations may lead to her unhappiness and suffering, but to refrain from doing a thing, when reason and judgment lead us to refrain, does not mean not to want the thing.

But saying that a man can truly love a woman without any sexual desire for her is ridiculous. A man who loves a woman and doesn't want to possess her (to use that outdated term) does not [369]love her—or he is completely incapable. Whatever the feeling might be for her—it isn’t love. He might choose to abstain from having sex with her if the situation is such that a sexual relationship could cause her unhappiness and suffering, but choosing not to do something when logic and reason tell us to hold back doesn’t mean that we don’t want it.

Love at First Sight. Nothing is more firmly established than the fact that a person may fall passionately and incurably in love with a person of the opposite sex at the very first sight, in the twinkling of an eye, in the literal sense of the word. One glance may be sufficient. And such a love may exist to the end of life, and may, if reciprocated, lead to supreme happiness, or if unreciprocated to the deepest unhappiness.

Love at First Sight. Nothing is more certain than the fact that a person can fall passionately and hopelessly in love with someone of the opposite sex at first sight, in the blink of an eye, in the true sense of the phrase. One look might be enough. And this kind of love can last a lifetime, potentially leading to immense happiness if it's mutual, or, if it's not, to profound sadness.

What it is that causes love at first sight is unknown. Some have suggested that the beloved object sets in motion or fermentation certain internal secretions (hormones) in the lover which cannot become "satisfied" or "neutralized" except by that person; and the possession of the beloved object becomes a physical necessity. This explanation really means nothing. It is a hypothesis unsusceptible of proof. But whatever the cause of love at first sight, it is so mysterious a phenomenon that it gives the mystics and metaphysicians some [370]justification for their talk about "electric currents" and "magnetic forces." These phrases also mean nothing, but are an attempt at explaining the suddenness and irresistibleness of the attack. So powerful is the attraction of love at first sight that people have been known to cross continents and oceans merely to get a glimpse of the beloved object; and people have been known to sacrifice everything—their career, their material possessions, their social standing, their honor, and even their wife and children, in order to gain their object. And a mother may give up her children whom she loves dearer than life, may risk ostracism and disgrace, only in order to be with the object of her love. This shows that love, then, becomes pathological, because any feeling which so completely masters an individual that he is willing to sacrifice everything he has in the world is pathological.

What causes love at first sight is still a mystery. Some people think that the person we fall for triggers certain internal chemicals (hormones) in us that can't be "satisfied" or "neutralized" by anyone else; thus, being with that person becomes a physical need. But this explanation doesn't really mean anything. It's a theory that can't be proven. Regardless of the reason behind love at first sight, it's such a mysterious phenomenon that it gives mystics and metaphysicians some [370] justification for discussing "electric currents" and "magnetic forces." These terms also don’t mean much, but they attempt to explain the sudden and irresistible nature of the experience. The pull of love at first sight is so strong that people have been known to travel great distances, crossing continents and oceans, just for a chance to see the person they love; and some have given up everything— their career, their possessions, their social standing, their honor, and even their spouse and kids—just to be with the one they desire. A mother might abandon her children, whom she loves more than anything, risking social isolation and shame, simply to be with the person she loves. This shows that love can become pathological because any feeling that completely takes over someone to the point where they are willing to give up everything for it is pathological.

Infatuation and Being in Love. While, as said, the feeling of love does not readily lend itself to dissection, to analysis, still we can differentiate some phases of it. We can differentiate between "being in love," "infatuation," and "love." Being in love is, as just indicated, a pathological, morbid phenomenon. The person who is in love is not in a normal condition. He can see nothing, he cannot be argued with, as far as his love is concerned. She [371]is the acme of perfection, physical, mental, and spiritual; nobody can be compared with her. And, of course, the man is anxiously eager to marry the object of his love—unless insuperable obstacles are in the way; for instance, if the man happens to be married.

Infatuation and Being in Love. Even though, as mentioned, the feeling of love isn’t easily analyzed, we can still identify some phases of it. We can tell the difference between "being in love," "infatuation," and "love." Being in love is, as stated, an unhealthy, irrational phenomenon. The person who is in love is not in a normal state of mind. They can't see things clearly, and you can't reason with them regarding their feelings. She [371] is the epitome of perfection, in every way; no one else compares to her. Naturally, the man is extremely eager to marry the object of his affection—unless there are serious obstacles in the way; for instance, if he happens to be married.

Infatuation may be as strong as any "being in love" feeling. But with this difference. In infatuation the man may know that the object of infatuation is an unworthy one, he may despise her, he may hate her, he may pray for her death, he may do his utmost to overcome the infatuation. In short, infatuation is a feeling, chiefly physical, which the man can analyze, the unworthiness and absurdity of which he may acknowledge, but which he is unable to resist or overcome. He feels himself bewitched; he feels himself caught in a net, he is anxious to tear asunder the meshes of the net, but is not strong enough to do it.

Infatuation can be as intense as any feeling of love. But there's a key difference. In infatuation, a man might recognize that the person he's infatuated with is not worthy; he might despise her, even hate her, and wish for her to be gone. He might try everything to get over the infatuation. Essentially, infatuation is a physical feeling that he can analyze, understanding its unworthiness and absurdity, yet he finds it impossible to resist or overcome. He feels enchanted; he feels trapped in a net, desperate to break free from its hold, but he doesn’t have the strength to do so.

And this is a pretty good way to differentiate between being in love and being infatuated. If in love the man does not want to be free from his chains; he does not want to cease to love or to be in love. When infatuated the man often uses his utmost will-power to break his shackles. Sexual satisfaction is often sufficient to shatter an infatuation; it is not [372]sufficient to destroy love—it often strengthens and eternalizes it.

And this is a pretty good way to tell the difference between being in love and being infatuated. When a man is in love, he doesn't want to break free from his bonds; he doesn’t want to stop loving or being in love. In contrast, when someone is infatuated, they often use all their willpower to escape their constraints. Sexual satisfaction can usually be enough to end an infatuation; however, it’s not enough to destroy love—it often makes it stronger and more everlasting.

Neither being in love nor infatuation can last "forever"; they are acute maladies of high tension and relatively short duration. Infatuation may change into indifference or disgust; "being in love" may change into indifference, hatred, or into real love—a steady, durable love.

Neither being in love nor infatuation can last "forever"; they are intense emotions that are high in energy but relatively short-lived. Infatuation can turn into indifference or disgust; "being in love" can turn into indifference, hatred, or real love—a steady, lasting love.

This will answer the often asked question: How do marriages turn out which are the result of a sudden, violent passion, or of love at first sight? No ironclad rules suitable for all cases can be given. Some turn out very unhappily, the couple gradually finding out that they are altogether unsuited to each other, that their temperaments are incompatible, that their views, ideas, likes and dislikes are different. In some cases what was supposed to be a great love is soon seen to have been merely an infatuation. And satiety and disgust follow. But in other cases, as mentioned, the sudden consuming passion turns into a warm, life-long love and the people live happily ever after.

This will answer the frequently asked question: How do marriages that result from sudden, intense passion or love at first sight turn out? There aren't any solid rules that apply to every situation. Some end up very unhappily, with the couple gradually realizing they are completely unsuited for each other, that their temperaments clash, and that their views, ideas, preferences, and dislikes are different. In some cases, what was thought to be great love quickly reveals itself to have been just infatuation, leading to boredom and disgust. But in other instances, as mentioned, that intense passion evolves into a deep, lifelong love, and the couple lives happily ever after.

Dr. Nyström relates the case of a prominent physician of France, of high social and scientific standing, who beheld a young girl accidentally in the street. He did not have the slightest idea who she was. He was irresistibly attracted to her. He [373]followed her, boarded the same omnibus and went to the house which she entered, rang the bell, introduced himself, begging pardon for his intrusion, but was dismissed. He returned and explained to her his ardent passion and asked permission to visit her parents, well-to-do people in the country, and the climax was a mutual love and a happy marriage.

Dr. Nyström shares the story of a well-known physician from France, respected in both social and scientific circles, who saw a young girl by chance on the street. He had no idea who she was, but he felt a strong attraction to her. He [373]followed her, got on the same bus, and went to the house where she entered. He rang the doorbell, introduced himself, and apologized for intruding, but she dismissed him. He went back and told her about his intense feelings and asked if he could meet her parents, who were well-off and lived in the countryside. This led to their mutual love and a happy marriage.

Many of us know of similar cases. But as a rule the slow developing love is more reliable than the suddenly bursting out flame.

Many of us are familiar with similar situations. But generally, a slowly developing love is more dependable than a sudden outburst of passion.


Love is the most complex, the most mysterious, the most unanalyzable of human emotions. It is based upon the difference in sex—upon the attraction of one sex for another. It is fostered by physical beauty, by daintiness, by a normal sexuality, by a fine character, by high aspirations, by culture and education, by common interests, by kindness and consideration, by pity, by habit and by a thousand other subtle feelings, qualities and actions, which are difficult of classification or enumeration.

Love is the most complex, mysterious, and unexplainable of human emotions. It's rooted in the differences between the sexes and the attraction one sex has for the other. It's nurtured by physical beauty, gracefulness, healthy sexuality, strong character, high aspirations, culture, education, shared interests, kindness, consideration, empathy, habit, and countless other subtle feelings, qualities, and actions that are hard to categorize or list.

A great love, greatly reciprocated, is in itself capable of rendering a human being supremely happy. Nothing else is. Other things, such as wealth, power, fame, success, great discoveries, may give supreme satisfaction, great contentment, but supreme, buoyant happiness is the gift of a great love only. Such [374]loves are rare, and the mortals that achieve it are the envy of the gods. But a great love, unreciprocated, especially when admixed to it is the feeling of jealousy, is the most frightful of tortures; it will crush a man like nothing else will, and the victims of this emotional catastrophe are pitied by the inmates of the lowest inferno.

A deep love that is fully returned can make a person incredibly happy. Nothing else compares. Other things like wealth, power, fame, success, and major achievements can provide great satisfaction and contentment, but only a deep love can bring true, uplifting happiness. Such [374]loves are rare, and those who experience them are envied by the gods. On the other hand, a deep love that isn't returned, especially when mixed with jealousy, is incredibly torturous; it can crush a person like nothing else, and those who suffer this emotional disaster are pitied by the souls in the depths of hell.




FOOTNOTES:

[9] To avoid confusion, I will state here that I am discussing love between the opposite sexes, and not maternal love, homosexual love, love for one's country, etc.

[9] To clarify, I'm talking about love between men and women, and not about maternal love, same-sex love, love for one’s country, and so on.







Chapter Fifty-oneToC

JEALOUSY AND HOW TO COMBAT IT

Jealousy the Most Painful of Human Emotions—Impairment of Health—Mental Havoc—Jealousy as a Primitive Emotion—Jealousy in the Advanced Thinker and in the Savage—Jealousy in the Child—Feelings and Environmental Factors—Essential Factors—Vanity—Anger—Pain—Envy—The Impotent Husband's Jealousy—Anti-social Qualities—The Jealous and the Unfaithful Husband—Means of Eradicating the Evil—Iwan Bloch on the Question—Prof. Robert Michels' Statement—Remark of Prof. Von Ehrenfels—Havelock Ellis on Variation in Sexual Relationships—Advanced Ideas—Woman as Man's Chattel—The Change and the Changer—Teaching the Children—Casting Epithets at Jealousy—Free Unions and Jealousy—Feelings, Actions and Public Opinion—The Adulterous Wife of the Present Day—Jealousy Defeating Its Own Object—Jealousy of Inanimate Objects.

Jealousy: The Most Painful of Human Emotions—Impact on Health—Mental Chaos—Jealousy as a Primitive Emotion—Jealousy in Advanced Thinkers and in Savages—Jealousy in Children—Feelings and Environmental Influences—Key Factors—Vanity—Anger—Pain—Envy—The Helpless Husband's Jealousy—Anti-Social Traits—The Jealous and Unfaithful Husband—Ways to Eliminate the Issue—Iwan Bloch on the Topic—Prof. Robert Michels' Insights—Remarks by Prof. Von Ehrenfels—Havelock Ellis on Variations in Sexual Relationships—Progressive Ideas—Woman as Man's Property—The Change and the Change-Maker—Educating Children—Labeling Jealousy—Open Relationships and Jealousy—Feelings, Actions, and Public Perception—The Adulterous Wife of Today—Jealousy Sabotaging Its Own Purpose—Jealousy of Inanimate Objects.


He or she who has been so unfortunate as to experience the pangs—or fangs—of jealousy will readily admit that it is one of the most painful, if indeed not the most painful, of all human emotions. The suffering that it metes out to its victims is indescribable. No other single human emotion so affects the body, so upsets the mind, so deranges every function, as does jealousy. The torture that it causes makes the sufferer a truly pitiable object: the complete loss of sleep and complete loss of appetite may result in a serious impairment of the [376]sufferer's health, while the rage it often gives rise to may lead to actual insanity, or at least to great mental disturbance. With good reason has popular fancy pictured this cursed emotion as a green-eyed monster.

Anyone who has been unlucky enough to feel the sting—or the bite—of jealousy will quickly agree that it’s one of the most painful, if not the most painful, of all human emotions. The suffering it inflicts on its victims is beyond words. No other emotion affects the body, disturbs the mind, or messes up every function quite like jealousy does. The torment it causes makes the sufferer a truly pitiable figure: the total lack of sleep and loss of appetite can seriously harm the [376]sufferer's health, while the anger it often triggers can lead to actual insanity or at least significant mental distress. It’s no surprise that people imagine this awful emotion as a green-eyed monster.

Jealousy is a primitive emotion. It is present not only in the primitive races, but even in animals. And being a primitive emotion, we can hardly hope to succeed in eradicating it entirely. Not in the immediate future, at any rate. But we can modify it.

Jealousy is a basic emotion. It's found not just in primitive cultures, but also in animals. Since it’s a fundamental emotion, we can’t expect to completely get rid of it. At least not anytime soon. However, we can change it.

The statement frequently heard that "human nature is human nature" is only a platitudinous half-truth. The fundamental part of human nature—the desire for happiness and the avoidance of suffering—cannot be changed, nor would we want to change it if we could. It would mean the disappearance of the human race. But that many of our primitive emotions can be greatly modified by culture, by new standards, by new ideals of morality, about this there can be no question.

The saying that "human nature is human nature" is just a cliché half-truth. The core of human nature—the wish for happiness and the desire to avoid suffering—can’t be changed, and we wouldn’t want it to be changed even if we could. That would mean the end of humanity. However, it's clear that many of our basic emotions can be significantly shaped by culture, new standards, and new moral ideals.

Just as love in modern man is an entirely different feeling from what it was in primitive man, so jealousy in the advanced thinker is a different feeling from what it was in the savage; and by education and true culture it can be modified still further. We hope that in time to come—I will not venture to say how soon that time will be here—this injurious, [377]degrading, anti-social feeling may be entirely or almost entirely eradicated from the human breast.

Just as love in today's person feels completely different from what it was in early humans, jealousy in a more advanced thinker is also a different feeling compared to that in a primitive individual; through education and true culture, it can be changed even more. We hope that in the future—though I won't speculate on how soon that will be—this harmful, degrading, anti-social feeling can be completely or almost completely removed from the human experience.

The primitive desire—and this primitive desire of the race is still fully exhibited by children—is to take possession of everything nice or useful that somebody else has and which we have not. But our education and our cultural standards, including fear of punishment, have so repressed this desire, have put it so deeply in the background, that normal human beings hardly feel it at all.

The basic instinct—and this instinct is still clearly shown in children—is to claim everything nice or useful that someone else has and we don’t. However, our upbringing and cultural values, including the fear of punishment, have suppressed this desire so much that normal people barely feel it anymore.

It is only improperly brought up people, mental defectives and those unable to adjust themselves to their environment who still have this primitive feeling of taking or stealing. And so with many other feelings and emotions; and so with jealousy.

It is only poorly raised individuals, mentally challenged people, and those unable to adapt to their surroundings who still possess this basic impulse of taking or stealing. This applies to many other feelings and emotions as well; the same goes for jealousy.

If we, at the very first notice of a manifestation of jealousy by a child, should frown upon it, if we should explain to the child or adolescent that jealousy is a mean, degrading feeling, that it is a feeling to be ashamed of, a feeling to hide and not to show off or even be proud of—as some are now—then jealousy would manifest itself in a much smaller number of individuals, and those unfortunate enough to be attacked by it would try to repress it, to hide it, to overcome it, so that it would eventually become paler and less acute and its consequences would be less significant, less disastrous for both [378]the victim and for the persons concerned. Feelings, let us bear in mind, are not spontaneous things uninfluenced by any environmental factors. Feelings are like plants; under one environment you may foster their growth and make them develop luxuriantly; under another environment you may dwarf their growth and strangle them.

If we were to immediately react negatively when a child shows signs of jealousy and explain to them that jealousy is a nasty, shameful emotion—something to be embarrassed about and not something to flaunt or be proud of—then fewer people would experience jealousy. Those who do struggle with it would try to suppress it, hide it, and overcome it, eventually causing it to diminish in intensity and significance, leading to less harm for both the victim and those involved. It's important to remember that feelings aren't just spontaneous reactions; they are influenced by their surroundings. Feelings are like plants; in one environment, you can nurture their growth and allow them to flourish, while in another, you can stunt their growth and choke them off.

In order to enable us to inhibit the growth of the demon of jealousy, we must learn what its essence is and what factors are favorable to its development.

To stop the growth of the demon of jealousy, we need to understand what it really is and what factors help it thrive.


Causes of Jealousy

The essential factor in jealousy is fear. Fear of losing the beloved object, fear of losing the person who provides you with sexual satisfaction, or the mere economic fear of losing a material provider. The latter kind of fear is, of course, more often manifested—even though unconsciously—in women. Women who have no love for their husbands are nevertheless often fiercely jealous, because consciously or unconsciously they are afraid that their husbands may desert them for other women, and that they may thus find themselves in a precarious economic condition.

The main issue with jealousy is fear. Fear of losing the person you love, fear of losing someone who fulfills your sexual needs, or just the worry of losing a financial provider. This last type of fear is, of course, more commonly seen—even if it's unconscious—in women. Women who don't love their husbands can still be extremely jealous because, consciously or unconsciously, they fear that their husbands might leave them for other women, which could lead them into a difficult financial situation.

Another factor in jealousy is wounded vanity. We do not like to feel that somebody is considered [379]superior to us. This feeling of wounded vanity is present in other varieties of envy or rivalry. A person who loses in a race or gets a lower mark in his examination than his rival may be filled with a feeling of envy and hatred almost equal in intensity to, though never as painful as, sexual jealousy.

Another factor in jealousy is hurt pride. We don’t like to feel that someone is seen as [379]better than us. This feeling of hurt pride is present in other forms of envy or rivalry. A person who loses a race or gets a lower grade on their exam than their competitor might feel a sense of envy and anger that is almost as intense as, but never as painful as, romantic jealousy.

Another factor in jealousy is anger over loss of what we consider our property. In our present social order the man considers his wife his absolute property, and so does the wife consider her husband. And there is anger that a stranger should dare to rob us or make use of our property, just as there would be anger if a thief came and robbed us of a valuable material possession. This anger or rage part of jealousy is not a sign of love. It is very far from being so. Because it manifests itself also in men and women who have not a particle of love for their spouses; it manifests itself in spouses who have nothing but hatred and loathing for their partners.

Another factor in jealousy is anger over the loss of what we see as our property. In today's society, a man views his wife as his complete property, and a wife sees her husband the same way. There’s anger when a stranger dares to take or use our property, just like we would feel if a thief stole a valuable item from us. This anger or rage tied to jealousy isn't a sign of love. In fact, it's the opposite. It also shows up in men and women who have no love for their spouses; it appears in couples who feel nothing but hatred and disgust for each other.

Another important factor is pain, pain that the person we love has ceased to love us. When we love a person and our love is not reciprocated, we feel pain which may rise to the degree of agony, even when there is no rival in the field. But when a person who loved us has ceased to love us—or we [380]imagine so—and has transferred the love to another person that pain is so much the greater.

Another important factor is pain, the pain that comes from the person we love no longer loving us. When we care for someone and our feelings aren't returned, it hurts deeply, even if there's no one else to compete with. But when someone who once loved us stops having those feelings—or we [380]think they have—and directs that love toward someone else, the pain increases significantly.

I will digress here for a moment to state that the fear that a person has ceased to love us because he loves somebody else is often groundless. It is based upon the erroneous and vicious idea that a man cannot possibly love two women at the same time, or that a woman cannot love two men at the same time. Psychologists, particularly those who have made a special study of sexual psychology, know that this idea is false. They know that love may be directed at the same time towards two or three individuals. They know that a second love not only does not necessarily destroy or diminish a first love, but may deepen and strengthen the latter.

I want to take a moment to say that the fear of someone not loving us anymore because they love someone else is often unfounded. This fear comes from the mistaken belief that a man can’t possibly love two women at the same time, or that a woman can’t love two men simultaneously. Psychologists, especially those who specialize in sexual psychology, understand that this belief isn’t true. They recognize that love can be directed towards two or three people at once. They also know that a second love doesn’t have to ruin or lessen a first love; it can actually deepen and strengthen it.

Another element is pure envy. Just mean envy that somebody should have what we haven't, or what we have but are in danger of losing. Just as we envy others an automobile, a fine house, a high social position, etc., when we have not got them or have been deprived of them.

Another element is pure envy. It's just nasty envy that someone else has what we don't, or what we have but might lose. Just like we envy others for a car, a nice house, a high social status, etc., when we don’t have them or have been denied them.

A point that I would like to mention is, that if husbands who have become impotent—having lost either the desire or the power, but particularly the latter—become jealous, their jealousy knows no bounds. No strongly potent man ever reaches the same intensity in jealousy as is reached by a [381]sexually weak or impotent man. The knowledge that another man has displaced him and that he himself could not replace that other man even if he were permitted to fills him with impotent rage; and, as is well known, impotent rage is always more intense than rage that is potent. Women are free from this kind of rage, because women are never impotent in this sense. (They may be frigid, but they are never devoid of the potentia coeundi, except in extremely rare cases of atresia vaginae or the absence of the external genitals.)

A point I want to bring up is that husbands who have become impotent—having lost either their desire or ability, especially the latter—often feel jealousy like no other. No potent man ever experiences jealousy with the same intensity as a sexually weak or impotent man. The awareness that another man has taken his place and that he can’t replace that man even if he had the chance fills him with impotent rage; and, as we all know, impotent rage is always more intense than rage from someone who is potent. Women don’t experience this kind of rage because they are never impotent in this way. (They can be frigid, but they never lack the potentia coeundi, except in extremely rare cases of atresia vaginae or when they are missing the external genitals.)

There are a number of other components which go to make up this "queen of torments" or "king of torturers" jealousy, but those I have enumerated are the essential ones.

There are several other elements that contribute to this "queen of torments" or "king of torturers," jealousy, but the ones I've listed are the most important.

What are they? Fear, vanity, anger, envy and pain. None of them admirable qualities, none of them, with the exception of the first and the last, even deserving our compassion. All of them anti-social and anti-individual qualities. Should not everything be done to eradicate such a rank weed, which draws its sustenance from roots each one of which is dipped in poison?

What are they? Fear, vanity, anger, envy, and pain. None of these are admirable qualities; only the first and the last even deserve our compassion. All of them are harmful to society and the individual. Shouldn't we do everything possible to eliminate such a toxic weed, which feeds on roots that are each steeped in poison?

We are told that in our primitive state jealousy was a social instinct; that by killing and keeping away rivals it helped to found and cement the family and to keep it pure. I do not care to enter here [382]into a discussion of this point. But whatever useful rôle jealousy may have played in the remote ages (I doubt that it has), it is now an utterly useless, utterly vicious, utterly anti-social and anti-individual emotion. It is opposed to social life and it destroys individual happiness. And everything possible should be done to smother it, to strangle it, to eliminate it entirely from human life.

We're told that in our primitive state, jealousy was a social instinct; by eliminating rivals and keeping them away, it helped establish and strengthen the family and keep it intact. I don’t want to dive into a discussion on this topic here [382]. But no matter what useful role jealousy may have played in ancient times (I doubt it ever did), it now serves no purpose and is a purely harmful, anti-social, and destructive emotion. It goes against social life and damages personal happiness. Everything possible should be done to suppress it, eliminate it, and remove it completely from human life.

Yes, I find no compensation whatever for jealousy; I find no place for it in our modern life and I am in complete agreement with Forel, who calls jealousy "a heritage of animals and barbarians." "That is what I would say," he says, "to all those who, in the name of offended honor, would grant it rights and even place it on a pedestal. It is ten times better for a woman to marry an unfaithful than a jealous husband.... Jealousy transforms marriage into a hell.... Even in its more moderate and normal form, jealousy is a torment, for distrust and suspicion poison love. We often hear of justified jealousy. I maintain that jealousy is never justifiable; it is always a stupid, atavistic inheritance, or else a pathological symptom."

Yes, I see no benefit in jealousy; I believe it has no place in our modern lives, and I completely agree with Forel, who calls jealousy "a relic of animals and savages." "That's what I would say," he argues, "to all those who, in the name of offended honor, would give it rights and even put it on a pedestal. It’s far better for a woman to marry an unfaithful husband than a jealous one.... Jealousy turns marriage into a nightmare.... Even in its milder and more normal form, jealousy is a torment, as distrust and suspicion poison love. We often hear about justified jealousy. I argue that jealousy is never justifiable; it is always a foolish, primitive legacy, or a pathological symptom."

But can anything be done to eradicate this agonizing, tormenting emotion? I believe it can, and the ways and means to the eradication of this evil will be found on analyzing its components. We may [383]not be able to destroy all the components; if we destroy the greater part of them much will have been accomplished.

But can anything be done to get rid of this painful, tormenting feeling? I think it can, and the ways to eliminate this issue will be found by breaking down its parts. We may [383]not be able to get rid of all the parts; if we eliminate most of them, a lot will have been achieved.

The underlying factors of jealousy are: the primitive instinct, also present in many animals, our ethical and religious ideas and our economic system. The primitive instinct we can repress and modify; we can hardly hope to eradicate it entirely. But our ideas and economic system we can change. It is easier to change ideas than it is a system, and it is with our ideas we should commence.

The main reasons for jealousy are: our basic instincts, which are also found in many animals, along with our moral beliefs and our economic system. We can suppress and adjust our basic instincts, but it's nearly impossible to completely eliminate them. However, we can alter our beliefs and economic system. Changing beliefs is typically easier than changing a system, and we should start with our beliefs.

The first idea we must endeavor to destroy is that it is impossible for a human being to love more than one other human being at the same time. We must show that the love of the modern educated and esthetic man and woman is an exceedingly complex feeling, and that a man may deeply and sincerely love one woman for certain qualities and just as deeply and sincerely love another woman for certain other qualities. Of course, love cannot be measured by the yard or bushel, nor can it be weighed on the most delicate chemical balance. And it may be impossible to determine whether he loves both women exactly alike or he loves one woman more than the other. But that one love does not exclude another, that it may even intensify the other love, [384]that is certain, and is the opinion of every advanced sexologist.

The first idea we need to challenge is the belief that a person can't love more than one other person at the same time. We must demonstrate that the love felt by modern educated and aesthetic individuals is a highly complex emotion, and that a man can truly and deeply love one woman for certain traits while also loving another woman just as deeply for different qualities. Of course, love can't be measured in yards or bushels, nor can it be weighed on the most sensitive scales. It may also be impossible to figure out if he loves both women exactly the same or if he has stronger feelings for one over the other. However, it's clear that one love doesn't cancel out another, and in fact, it might even enhance the other love, [384] which is a view shared by every progressive sexologist.

Max Nordau, a man of high and austere ideals, a man whom nobody will accuse of a tendency to licentiousness, says in his Conventional Lies: "It may sound very shocking, yet I must say it: we can even love several individuals at the same time, with nearly equal tenderness, and we do not necessarily lie when we assure each one of our passion. No matter how deeply we may be in love with a certain individual, we do not cease to be susceptible to the influence of the entire sex."

Max Nordau, a man of strong and serious ideals, a man whom no one would accuse of being promiscuous, says in his Conventional Lies: "It might sound really surprising, but I have to say this: we can actually love multiple people at the same time, with almost equal affection, and we don’t necessarily lie when we promise each one of our love. No matter how deeply we might be in love with one person, we are still open to the allure of all others."

And Iwan Bloch, than whom no greater investigator in the field of sexology ever lived, asks the question: "Is it possible for any one to be simultaneously in love with several individuals?" And he immediately says: "I answer this question with an unconditional 'yes.'" And he says further: "It is precisely the extraordinary manifold spiritual differentiation of modern civilized humanity that gives rise to the possibility of such a simultaneous love for two individuals. Our spiritual nature exhibits the most varied coloring. It is difficult always to find the corresponding complements in one single individual."

And Iwan Bloch, who is undoubtedly the greatest researcher in the field of sexology, poses the question: "Is it possible for anyone to be simultaneously in love with multiple people?" He immediately responds, "I answer this question with an unconditional 'yes.'" He continues, "It is precisely the incredible variety of spiritual differences in modern civilized society that allows for the possibility of loving two individuals at the same time. Our spiritual nature has the most diverse expressions. It is often challenging to find the perfect match in just one person."

Prof. Robert Michels says: "It is Nature's will that the normal male should feel a continuous and [385]powerful sexual attraction towards a considerable number of women.... In the male the stimuli capable of arousing sexual excitement (this term is not to be understood here in the grossly physical sense) are so extraordinarily manifold, so widely differentiated that it is quite impossible for one single woman to possess them all."

Prof. Robert Michels says: "It is Nature's intention that a normal man should experience a constant and [385]strong sexual attraction towards a considerable number of women.... In men, the stimuli that can trigger sexual excitement (this term shouldn't be taken in the purely physical sense) are so incredibly diverse and varied that it's entirely unrealistic for one single woman to embody them all."

Prof. von Ehrenfels wittily remarks that if it were a moral precept that a man should never have intercourse more them once in his life with any particular woman, this would correspond far better with the nature of the normal male and would cost him far less will-power than is needed by him in order to live up to the conventional demands of monogamy.

Prof. von Ehrenfels cleverly points out that if it were a moral rule for a man to only have sex more than once in his life with any specific woman, it would align much better with the typical nature of men and would require much less willpower than what's needed to meet the traditional expectations of monogamy.

And Havelock Ellis cautiously says: "A certain degree of variation is involved in the sexual relationships, as in all other relationships, and unless we are to continue to perpetuate many evils and injustices, that fact has to be faced and recognized."

And Havelock Ellis carefully states: "Some level of variation is present in sexual relationships, just like in all other relationships, and if we want to stop perpetuating many evils and injustices, we need to acknowledge and accept that fact."

I have devoted considerable space to this topic, and I have, contrary to my custom, quoted "authorities," because I consider this point of the utmost importance; it is the first step in combating the demon of jealousy. If our wives, fiancées and sweethearts could be convinced of the truth that a man's interest in or even affection towards another [386]member of the female sex does not mean the death of love, or even diminished love, half of the battle would be won. Half of the misery, half of the quarrels, half of the self-torture, half of the disrupted homes, in short, half of the tyrannical reign of the demon of jealousy, would be gone.

I’ve spent a lot of time on this topic, and I’ve, unlike my usual practice, cited “experts” because I believe this issue is extremely important; it’s the first step in fighting the demon of jealousy. If our wives, fiancées, and girlfriends could understand that a man’s interest in or even affection for another [386]woman doesn’t mean the end of love, or even less love, we would have overcome half the battle. Half of the misery, half of the arguments, half of the self-inflicted pain, half of the broken homes, in short, half of the oppressive rule of the demon of jealousy, would be eliminated.

We must teach our women and men this truth, teach it from puberty on. We must show them that not every woman can necessarily fill out a man's entire life, that not every woman can necessarily occupy every nook and corner of a man's mind and heart, and that there is nothing humiliating to the woman in such an idea (and vice versa). She should be taught to find nothing shameful, painful or degrading in such a thought. I know that these ideas are somewhat in advance of the times, but if nobody ever brought forward any advanced ideas because they were advanced there would never be any advance.

We need to teach our women and men this truth, starting from puberty. We must show them that not every woman can completely fulfill a man's life, that not every woman can occupy every part of a man's mind and heart, and that there’s nothing degrading about this idea for the woman (and vice versa). She should learn to find nothing shameful, painful, or humiliating in this thought. I understand that these ideas are somewhat ahead of their time, but if no one ever proposed any progressive ideas just because they are ahead of their time, there would never be any progress.

Then we must teach our men that when they marry a woman she does not become their chattel, their piece of property, which nobody may touch, nobody may look at or smile at. A woman may be a very good, faithful wife and still enjoy the companionship of other men, the pressure of another man's hand or—horribile dictu—even an occasional kiss.

Then we need to teach our men that when they marry a woman, she doesn't become their property, something that nobody can touch, look at, or smile at. A woman can be a loyal and loving wife and still enjoy the company of other men, the touch of another man's hand, or—horrible to say—even an occasional kiss.

Then we must teach our men and women that [387]there is essentially nothing shameful or humiliating in being displaced by a rival. The change may be a disgrace for the changer and not for the changed one. It does not at all mean that the change has been made because the rival is superior; it is a well-known fact that the rival often is inferior. The change is often made, not because the changer has gone upward, but because he has gone downward, has deteriorated. And the changer often knows it himself.

Then we must teach our men and women that [387]there's really nothing shameful or humiliating about being replaced by a rival. The change might be a disgrace for the one making the change, not for the one being changed. It doesn't necessarily mean that the change happened because the rival is better; it's a well-known fact that the rival is often not better. The change often occurs, not because the one changing has moved up, but because they have actually moved down, deteriorating. And the one making the change often realizes this themselves.

Inculcating those ideas would do away with the feeling of wounded vanity which is such an important component in the feeling of jealousy.

Incorporating those ideas would eliminate the sense of hurt pride that is a key part of jealousy.

Further, we must teach our children from the earliest age that jealousy is "not nice," that it is a mean feeling, that it is a sign of weakness, that it is degrading to the person who entertains it, particularly to the person who exhibits it. Ideas inculcated from childhood have a powerful influence, and the various ideas exposed above would have an undoubted influence in minimizing the mephitic, destructive effects of the feeling of jealousy. People properly brought up will always succeed in controlling or suppressing certain non-vital instincts or emotions on which society puts its stamp of disapproval, which it considers "not nice" or disgraceful.

Furthermore, we need to teach our kids from a young age that jealousy isn’t nice, that it’s a negative feeling, a sign of weakness, and that it degrades the person who feels it, especially the one who shows it. The ideas we instill in them early on have a strong impact, and the concepts mentioned above would definitely help reduce the harmful, destructive effects of jealousy. People who are raised right will always be able to control or suppress certain non-essential instincts or emotions that society disapproves of, which it deems “not nice” or shameful.

[388]I am, therefore, an optimist in relation to the eventual uprooting of the greater number of components of the anti-social feeling of jealousy. And when woman reaches economic independence, then another component of the instinct of jealousy—the terror at losing a provider and being left in poverty—will disappear.

[388]So, I’m optimistic about finally getting rid of a lot of the elements behind the negative feelings of jealousy. Once women achieve economic independence, another part of jealousy—the fear of losing a provider and ending up in poverty—will fade away.

Jealousy Not Toward Rivals. Jealousy need not express itself toward a sexual rival only. A person may be jealous of people who can never be sexual rivals; the jealousy need not even be of people; it may be of inanimate objects, of a person's work, profession or hobby. Thus a wife may be intensely jealous of her husband's mother, towards whom he is very affectionate or simply kind and considerate. She may be jealous of her own children if she notices or imagines that the father loves them intensely, or if he spends a good deal of time with them. She may be jealous of his male friends, and many a husband had to give up, not only his female acquaintances, but his life-long male friends—in order to preserve peace in the family. A wife may be fiercely jealous of her husband's success and reputation, and cases are not unknown where the wife put every possible obstacle in her husband's way, in order to make him fail in his work, to make him turn out mediocre work, all from fear that his [389]success would gain him admirers, which might perhaps take him away from her. Wives have been known to do everything in their power to exhaust and weaken their husbands, to make them physically unattractive, only to keep them. And so powerful is this primitive, childish, savage feeling, this desire for exclusive monopoly, that there is nothing a jealous wife, sweetheart or mistress may not do in order to retain the man, in order to regain him, or, having lost him irretrievably, in order to revenge herself. And what is said about the woman is applicable with equal force to man. It is a huge mistake to assume that jealousy is woman's prerogative, her particular characteristic, or even that it is stronger in her than in man. A man can be as savagely jealous as any woman and suffer the same tortures of hell.

Jealousy Not Toward Rivals. Jealousy doesn't have to be directed only at a sexual rival. A person can feel jealous of those who could never be sexual competitors; the jealousy doesn’t even need to be aimed at people; it can be towards inanimate objects, someone’s work, career, or hobby. For instance, a wife may feel intensely jealous of her husband's mother, whom he is affectionate, kind, or considerate toward. She might be jealous of her own children if she notices or imagines that the father loves them deeply, or if he spends a lot of time with them. She might feel jealous of his male friends, and many husbands have had to sacrifice not only their female acquaintances but also long-term male friendships to keep peace at home. A wife may be fiercely jealous of her husband's achievements and reputation, and there are instances where wives have actively tried to put obstacles in their husbands' paths, hoping to hinder their success, fearing that his [389] accomplishments would attract admirers who might take him away from her. Wives have even been known to do everything they can to exhaust and weaken their husbands, making them physically unattractive, just to keep them close. This primitive, childish, savage feeling, this desire for exclusive possession, is so strong that there is nothing a jealous wife, girlfriend, or mistress won’t do to keep the man, to win him back, or, if she loses him for good, to seek revenge. And what’s true for women applies equally to men. It’s a big misconception to believe that jealousy is solely a woman's domain or that it’s stronger in women than in men. A man can be just as brutally jealous as any woman and endure the same intense suffering.

Jealousy Defeats Its Object. One of the worst features about jealousy is that it defeats its own object. We have been told, as stated before, that jealousy was once upon a time a racial instinct, that by frightening away rivals it helped to found the family and to keep it chaste and pure. Quite the contrary is true now. More than one man has, by accusing his innocent wife of infidelity and by torturing her with baseless suspicions, driven her into the arms of a lover. We are all more or less [390]susceptible to suggestion, and by continually suspecting a wife of a love affair or illicit relation a man may implant the seed of suggestion so strongly that it may grow luxuriantly and the wife may be unable to resist the suggested temptation. And very often the very lover is suggested by the husband. "Yes, don't attempt to deny it. It is useless. I know you have relations with X. I know you are his mistress." He kept on repeating it so often to his absolutely blameless, innocent young wife and he made her so wretched by his rudeness and brutality that one day she did go over to X's rooms and did become his mistress. And after that she could stand her husband's outbursts with equanimity. "If I have the name I might as well have the game," is a good bit of psychologic wisdom. And a husband should be very careful about even suspecting a wife unjustly, and thus make the first step towards rendering his baseless suspicions a reality, his unjust accusations justified. And, of course, what is true of the husband is also true of the wife. Many a wife has driven her indolent husband into the hands of prostitutes or mistresses by her incessant nagging, false accusations and vicious epithets applied to all his female friends and acquaintances.

Jealousy Defeats Its Object. One of the worst things about jealousy is that it undermines its own purpose. We've been told before that jealousy was once an instinct tied to race, meant to scare off rivals and help create a family that stayed loyal and pure. The opposite is true now. More than one man has, by accusing his innocent wife of cheating and torturing her with unfounded suspicions, pushed her into the arms of another man. We're all somewhat [390]open to suggestion, and by constantly suspecting a wife of having an affair, a man can plant that idea so deeply that it takes root, and the wife may struggle to resist the temptation. Often, the husband himself suggests the very lover. "Yes, don’t try to deny it. It’s pointless. I know you’re involved with X. I know you’re his mistress." He kept repeating this to his completely innocent young wife, and he made her so miserable with his harshness and cruelty that one day she did go to X's place and became his mistress. After that, she could endure her husband's outbursts without much reaction. "If I have the name, I might as well enjoy the game," is a piece of psychological wisdom. A husband should be very cautious about even unjustly suspecting a wife, as this can lead him to turn his unfounded suspicions into a reality and make his unfair accusations seem valid. And, of course, the same is true for wives. Many a wife has driven her lazy husband into the arms of prostitutes or mistresses with her constant nagging, false accusations, and nasty comments aimed at all his female friends and acquaintances.

Yes, from whatever angle you consider it, jealousy is a mean, nasty, miserable feeling. Because it [391]is a more or less universal feeling, because "we cannot help it," does not render it less mean, less nasty, less miserable.

Yes, no matter how you look at it, jealousy is a cruel, unpleasant, miserable emotion. Just because it [391]is a feeling that most people experience, and because "we can’t help it," doesn’t make it any less cruel, unpleasant, or miserable.

I do not for a moment imagine that characterizing jealousy the way it deserves to be characterized, calling it a shameful, savage, primitive feeling, etc., is at once going to banish it from the breasts of men and women in which it has found an abiding place; throwing epithets at it will not cause it to unfasten its talons. Unfortunately, I know only too well that our emotions are stronger than our reason; the man or woman at whose poor heart jealousy is gnawing day and night is not amenable to reason, is not curable by arguments; all we can do is to sympathize with such a person and ask the Lord to pity him or her.

I don’t for a second think that describing jealousy as it truly is—calling it a shameful, brutal, primal feeling, etc.—is going to make it disappear from the hearts of men and women where it has settled in. Just throwing insults at it won’t make it let go of its grip. Sadly, I know all too well that our emotions are more powerful than our reasoning; a person who is suffering from jealousy day and night isn’t swayed by logic and can’t be cured by arguments. All we can do is empathize with that person and ask the Lord to have mercy on them.

I have known a man who lived with his wife in free union, i.e., he was not married to her. He did not believe in marriage. Love was the only bond that should bind people together; as soon as love was no more the people should separate in a friendly, comradely manner. If the wife or the mistress wants another lover, she should be free to take one; she is a free human being and not her husband's chattel slave, etc., etc., etc., to the same effect. Thus the man talked. And he was sincere in his talk—or he thought he was. But one night on [392]unexpectedly returning home he found another man; he promptly fired several shots at the man, which fortunately for both did not prove fatal, and then he beat and choked his wife—who wasn't even his wife legally—within an inch of her life. And then he married her and gave up his free love talk. And I know of any number of men who could philosophize for hours about the disgrace and humiliation of being jealous, but who, as soon as there was a justifiable cause for jealousy, became as unreasonable as a child and as jealous as any unlettered Sicilian woman ever was.

I knew a guy who lived with his girlfriend without being married. He didn't believe in marriage. He thought love was the only thing that should connect people, and once love faded, they should split up amicably. If his girlfriend wanted to date someone else, she should be free to do so; she was a free person, not his property. That's how he spoke. And he genuinely believed it—or thought he did. But one night on [392], when he unexpectedly came home, he found another man there. He immediately shot at the guy several times, which, luckily for both of them, didn’t end in death. Then, he beat and choked his girlfriend—who wasn’t even legally his wife—almost to death. And then he married her and stopped his talk about free love. I know plenty of guys who could talk endlessly about the shame and humiliation of jealousy, but as soon as they had a reason to feel jealous, they acted like whiny kids and were as jealous as any uneducated Sicilian woman ever was.

So you see, I am not deluding myself with extravagant hopes. But, nevertheless, this argumentation, this talk, is not entirely useless. A beginning must be made. This essay may not perhaps help—except for the suggestions that will be made towards the end—those who are already victims of the demon of jealousy, but it may help some people to keep out of his clutches (or should I say: her clutches? I really don't know whether the demon of jealousy is a male or a female.)

So, you see, I'm not fooling myself with grand hopes. However, this discussion isn’t completely pointless. A start has to be made. This essay might not really assist those who are already caught by the demon of jealousy, except for the suggestions I’ll provide at the end, but it might help some people avoid falling into its grasp (or should I say: her grasp? I honestly can't tell if the jealousy demon is male or female).

Feelings are stronger than reason; but that does not mean that feelings cannot be influenced by reason; they decidedly can be and are so influenced, and their manifestations are modified by this influence; and the more cultured, the more educated a person [393]is (I trust you will know that I use these terms in their true and not their vulgar, misused meaning), the more will his feelings, or at least actions, be influenced by his reason. I am particularly a believer in the effect on our feelings and actions of public opinion, of ideas universally or generally entertained.

Feelings are stronger than logic; but that doesn't mean feelings can't be shaped by reasoning; they certainly can be, and their manifestations are changed by this influence. The more cultured and educated a person is [393] (I trust you understand that I'm using these terms in their true sense and not their common, misused form), the more their feelings, or at least their actions, will be swayed by their reasoning. I'm particularly convinced of the impact that public opinion and widely held ideas have on our feelings and actions.

Let me give one example which is pertinent to the subject. In former days it was universally held, and in many places it is still held, that when a wife sinned she committed the most unpardonable crime that a human being could be guilty of and that she thereby dishonored her husband. And the only right thing for him to do was to shoot the rival and cast out the wife; or at least to cast her out. This was a conditio sine qua non. To take her back to his home was a disgrace, a sign of unpardonable weakness, of degeneracy. Our ideas on the subject have changed a bit. A husband is no longer considered any more dishonored—in some strata of society at least—because his wife sinned than a wife is considered dishonored because her husband sinned; and adultery in the wife is now, by most rational people, considered only different in degree, but not in kind, from adultery in the husband. These humane ideas have gained vogue only within a comparatively very recent period; but their effect [394]has already manifested itself in a great number of instances. Forgiving the erring wife is becoming quite common. A number of cases have reached the newspapers. Recently a wife was implicated in a nasty scrape; her sin was not only unquestionable, but notorious; it was public property. And nevertheless the husband stood by her and took her back into his home and arms. And the number of such cases which do not reach the newspapers is very, very much larger than the public has any conception of, larger than it would be safe to estimate. And in a large percentage of these cases the husband begins to treat his wife with more love, more consideration, and the tie between them becomes more firm, more permanent.

Let me give you an example that's relevant to the topic. In the past, it was widely believed, and in many places it still is, that when a wife committed a wrongdoing, she was guilty of the most unforgivable offense and thereby dishonored her husband. The only right thing for him to do was to confront the rival and reject the wife; or at the very least, to cast her out. This was a conditio sine qua non. Bringing her back home was seen as disgraceful, a sign of weakness and decline. Our views on this issue have shifted somewhat. A husband is no longer viewed as more dishonored—in some social circles, at least—because his wife strayed than a wife is viewed as dishonored because her husband did; and adultery by a wife is now, for most rational people, seen as just a different degree of the same issue when it involves a husband. These compassionate views have only recently become popular; however, their impact [394]has already been evident in many instances. Forgiving a wayward wife is becoming quite common. Several cases have made it into the news. Recently, a woman got involved in a scandal; her wrongdoing was not just undeniable but also widely known. Still, the husband stood by her and welcomed her back into his home and arms. And the number of these cases that never make it to the news is significantly larger than the public realizes, even larger than one could reasonably estimate. In a substantial percentage of these cases, the husband starts to treat his wife with more love and consideration, and their bond becomes stronger and more lasting.







Chapter Fifty-twoToC

REMEDIES FOR JEALOUSY

Prevention and Cure—Prophylaxis of Jealousy—Fitting Remedy to Circumstances—The Neglectful and Flirtatious Husband—No Question of Love—Advice to the wife of the Flirtatious Man—An Efficient Though Vulgar Remedy—Jealousy Must Be Experienced to Be Understood—Necessity for Freedom of Association—Lines of Conduct for the Wife—Contempt for a Certain Type of Wife and Husband—The Abandoned Lover—The Effects of Unrequited Love—Sublimated Sexual Desire—Replacing Unrequited Love—The Attitude of Goethe—Simultaneous Loves Possible—Successive Loves Possible—Eternal Loves—When Sex Relationships May Be Beneficial—Purchasable Sex Relations and Their Value—The Broken Engagement—The Terrible Effects on the Young Man—The Young Streetwalker—Sex Relations with Fiancé—Inundating Sense of Shame—Collapse—Attempts at Suicide—An Active Sex Life—The Results—The Prevention of Jealousy.

Prevention and Cure—Managing Jealousy—Choosing the Right Solution for the Situation—The Neglectful and Flirtatious Husband—No Doubt About Love—Advice for the Wife of a Flirtatious Man—An Effective Yet Crude Remedy—Jealousy Has to Be Felt to Be Understood—The Need for Freedom in Relationships—Guidelines for the Wife—Disdain for Certain Types of Wives and Husbands—The Forgotten Lover—The Effects of Unreturned Love—Transcended Sexual Desire—Moving On from Unreturned Love—Goethe's Perspective—Simultaneous Love Affairs Are Possible—Sequential Love Affairs Are Possible—Timeless Love—When Sexual Relationships Can Be Beneficial—The Value of Bought Sexual Relationships—The Broken Engagement—The Horrible Effects on the Young Man—The Young Streetwalker—Sexual Relationships with a Fiancé—Overwhelming Shame—Breakdown—Suicidal Thoughts—A Thriving Sexual Life—The Outcomes—Preventing Jealousy.


We are all agreed that prevention is more important than cure. But when a patient comes with a fully developed disease it is futile to speak to him of prevention. It is too late to sermonize. What he wants and what he needs is a cure, if such can be had. What has preceded has reference chiefly to the prophylaxis of jealousy, to the prevention of the development of this disease in the future.

We all agree that preventing something is more important than trying to fix it later. But when a patient shows up with a serious illness, talking about prevention is pointless. It’s too late for that. What they want and need is a cure, if one is available. What has come before mainly relates to preventing jealousy, to stopping this issue from developing in the future.

The question is: Is there a remedy for this malady? Is there a cure for this horrible disease of jealousy?

The question is: Is there a remedy for this issue? Is there a cure for this terrible disease of jealousy?

[396]The conditions are extremely complex, and the remedy must be fitted to the circumstances. Let us assume that the husband neglects his wife and causes her to be jealous, not because he is in love with another woman, but because he is flirtatious, light-headed, feather-brained and inconsiderate. Such cases are in the great majority. Many husbands who like or love their wives and who believe themselves secure in their love think it is quite proper for them to hunt for new conquests and to carry on petty love affairs with as many girls or women as they comfortably can. There is no question here about love—it is just flirtation or sexual relations. When this is the case the wife should have a frank and firm talk with her husband; she should tell him that she does not like his behavior and that it makes her unhappy. In many instances this alone will suffice to effect a change in the husband's conduct. Where this does not suffice, where the husband is too egotistic and does not want to give up his little pleasures, then it is left for the wife to adopt the old and rather vulgar remedy. It is old and, as said, rather vulgar, but it has the merit of efficiency: it very often works. Let the wife adopt similar tactics, let her also flirt, let her go out and come back at uncertain hours, let her keep the husband guessing as to where and with whom she is. And nine [397]times out of ten this, under the circumstances, fully justifiable conduct on the part of the wife will effect a quick and radical change in the conduct of the husband. He will be only too glad to cry quits. Some people are utterly devoid of imagination. They lack the ability of putting themselves in another person's place. Jealousy particularly is not a feeling which any one can understand without having experienced it, unless he is endowed with the imagination of a great poet. And as few husbands have a great poetic imagination, it is only after they have felt the claws of the monster tearing at their own hearts that they can understand their wives' feelings, and are willing to act so as to save them—and themselves, of course—the cruel tortures. Many wives and many husbands have talked to me and written to me on the subject, and, as stated before, in nine times out of ten the remedy worked.

[396]The situation is very complicated, and the solution needs to be tailored to the circumstances. Let's say the husband ignores his wife and makes her jealous, not because he loves another woman, but because he’s flirty, carefree, thoughtless, and inconsiderate. This is the case for most men. Many husbands who like or love their wives and feel secure in that love think it’s okay to seek new conquests and engage in flirty affairs with as many women as they can without much thought. This isn’t really about love—it’s just flirting or physical encounters. In this situation, the wife should have an honest and straightforward conversation with her husband; she should let him know that she disapproves of his behavior and that it makes her unhappy. In many cases, this alone can lead to a change in the husband’s behavior. If that doesn’t work, and the husband is too self-centered to give up his little pleasures, the wife may have to resort to an old and somewhat crude tactic. It’s old and, as mentioned, rather crude, but it’s effective: it often gets results. The wife should take similar actions; she can flirt, go out and come back at unpredictable times, and keep the husband wondering where she is and who she’s with. Most of the time, this entirely justifiable behavior by the wife will lead to a swift and significant change in the husband’s actions. He'll likely be more than willing to call it even. Some people lack imagination entirely. They can’t empathize with others. Jealousy, in particular, is a feeling that one can’t truly understand without experiencing it, unless they have the imagination of a great poet. And since few husbands possess such a poetic imagination, it’s usually only after they feel the pain of jealousy themselves that they comprehend their wives’ emotions and are willing to act to spare both their wives and themselves from further heartache. Many wives and husbands have reached out to me about this issue, and, as previously stated, in nine out of ten cases, the remedy proved effective. [397]

But how about the tenth case? How about the cases where the husband is unable or unwilling to give up his outside flirtations and relations? We, advanced sexologists, know that not all men, no more than all women, are made in the same mould, and what is possible or even easy for nine men may be very difficult or absolutely impossible for the tenth. We know that there are some men to whom an ironclad monogamic relation is an absolute [398]impossibility. The stimulation of other women—either the purely mental, spiritual stimulation or the stimulation of physical relations—is to them like breath in the nostrils. In fact, there are some men whose very possibility of loving their wives depends upon this freedom of association with other women. They can be extremely kind to and love their wives tenderly, if they can at the same time associate—spiritually or physically—with other women. If they are entirely cut off from any association with any other woman they begin to feel irritable, bored, may become ill, and their feeling towards their wives may become one of resentment, ill-will, or even one of hatred. This is not the place to talk of the wickedness of such men—thus they are made and with this fact we have to deal.

But what about the tenth case? What about situations where the husband can’t or won’t let go of his outside flirtations and relationships? We, as modern sexologists, understand that not all men, just like all women, are the same, and what is possible or even easy for nine men may be incredibly difficult or completely impossible for the tenth. We recognize that there are some men for whom a strictly monogamous relationship is an absolute impossibility. The attraction to other women—whether it’s purely mental and emotional or physical—is essential to them. In fact, there are some men whose ability to love their wives depends on their freedom to connect with other women. They can be very loving and kind to their wives as long as they can also connect—emotionally or physically—with other women. If they’re completely cut off from any contact with other women, they start to feel irritable and bored, might get sick, and their feelings toward their wives can turn into resentment, negativity, or even hatred. This isn’t the time to discuss the flaws of such men—this is just how they are, and we have to acknowledge this reality.

What is the wife of such a man to do? Two lines of conduct are open to her—two avenues of exit. The line of conduct will depend upon her temper and upon her ideas of sex morality. But she ought to select the line of conduct which will cause the least pain, the least unhappiness. If she is a woman of a proud, independent temper, particularly if she belongs to the militant type, she will leave her husband in a huff, regardless of consequences. But if she is a woman of the gentler, more pliable, more supple (and I may also say more subtle) type, and [399]if she really loves her husband, she will overlook his little foibles, peccadilloes and transgressions—and she may live quite happily. And the time will come when the husband himself will give up his peccadilloes and transgressions and will cleave powerfully to his wife, will be bound to her by bonds never to be torn asunder. I know of several such cases.

What is a woman in this situation supposed to do? She has two options—two paths available to her. The choice will depend on her personality and her views on sexual morality. However, she should choose the path that will cause the least pain and unhappiness. If she is proud and independent, especially if she is the assertive type, she will likely leave her husband in anger, no matter the consequences. But if she is gentler, more flexible, and also more subtle, and if she truly loves her husband, she may overlook his minor faults and mistakes—and might find a way to be quite happy. Eventually, the husband may also let go of his indiscretions and come to cherish his wife, forming a bond that will be unbreakable. I know of several such cases.

And I will take this opportunity to say that I have the deepest contempt for the wife who, on finding out that her husband had committed a transgression or that he has a love affair, leaves him in a huff, or makes a public scandal, or sues for divorce. Such a wife never loved her husband, and he is well rid of her. And what I said about the wife applies with almost equal force to the husband.

And I want to take this chance to say that I have the utmost disdain for a wife who, upon discovering that her husband has cheated or has a secret relationship, storms out, creates a huge scene, or files for divorce. That kind of wife never truly loved her husband, and he's better off without her. The same goes for husbands; what I said about the wife also applies to them with almost the same intensity.

The Abandoned Lover. But what shall the abandoned lover do? Let us take the case of A and B, and let A stand for any man and B for any woman; or, vice versa, let A be the woman and B the man, for in jealousy and love what applies to one sex is applicable with practically the same force to the opposite sex. Suppose A is intensely jealous of and deeply, passionately in love with B; but B is utterly indifferent and does not care what A may feel or do. A and B may be married or not; this does not alter the case materially. Suppose B, if unmarried to A, goes off and marries another man, [400]or, if married to A, goes off and leaves him; or suppose B does not love anybody else, but just remains indifferent to A's advances or repels him because she cannot reciprocate his love. Unrequited love alone can cause almost as fierce tortures as the most intense jealousy. And A suffers tortures. What shall he do? What shall he do to save himself—to save his health, his mind, his life? For he is unable to eat, unable to sleep, unable to work, and he feels that he is going to pieces. He has lost his position and is in danger of losing his reason. What shall he do to escape insanity or a suicide's grave? There is but one remedy. Let him use all his energies to find a substitute. I mean a living substitute. Mere sexual desire may be sublimated, to a certain extent, into other channels, may be replaced by work, study, a hobby or some engrossing interest. A great unrequited love, with the element of jealousy present or absent, cannot be replaced by anything else except by another love. And where as great a love is impossible let it be a minor love or a series of minor loves. When Goethe, one of the world's great lovers, was unable to walk in the broad avenue of a great love he would walk in the by-paths of a number of little loves. The common talk about a person being unable to love more than once in his or her life is silly nonsense. A man or [401]a woman is able to love, and love very deeply, a number of times; and love simultaneously or successively. It is often a mere matter of opportunity. I know that there are loves that are eternal; that there are loves for which no substitute can be found. But these supreme, divine loves are so rare that among ordinary mortals they may be left out of account. They are the portion of supermen and superwomen. Ordinarily a substitute may be found. The substitute love may never reach the intensity of the original love, it may never give full or even half-full satisfaction; but it will help to dull the sharp cutting edge, it will act as a partial hemostatic to the bleeding heart, it will soothe and anesthetize the wound even if it cannot completely heal it. And this is a valuable aid while the sufferer is coming to himself or herself, while the gathered fragments of a broken life are being cemented and while the cement is hardening. Yes, the man or woman who is in inferno on account of an unreciprocated or a betrayed love should lose no time in searching for a substitute love. I do not believe in people losing their health and their minds on account of suffering which does nobody any good.

The Abandoned Lover. But what should the abandoned lover do? Let's consider A and B, where A represents any man and B represents any woman; or, vice versa, let A be the woman and B the man, because in jealousy and love, what affects one sex can also apply to the other. Imagine A is extremely jealous and deeply, passionately in love with B; however, B feels completely indifferent and doesn't care about A's emotions or actions. A and B might be married or not; this doesn't significantly change the situation. Suppose B, if she's not married to A, goes off and marries someone else, [400] or, if they're married, she leaves him; or let's say B doesn’t love anyone else, but just remains indifferent to A's attempts or rejects him because she can't return his love. Unrequited love alone can inflict almost as much pain as the most intense jealousy. And A suffers greatly. What should he do? What can he do to save himself—to protect his health, sanity, and life? He can't eat, sleep, or work, and feels like he's falling apart. He's lost his job and is at risk of losing his mind. What can he do to avoid insanity or a tragic end? There’s only one solution. He should use all his energy to find a substitute. I mean a living substitute. Pure physical desire can be redirected to some extent into other outlets like work, study, a hobby, or another engrossing interest. A great unrequited love, whether jealousy is involved or not, can only be replaced by another love. And where a great love isn't possible, it can be a smaller love or a series of minor loves. When Goethe, one of history's great lovers, couldn't pursue a grand love, he explored the smaller avenues of multiple little loves. The idea that a person can only love once in their life is just nonsense. A man or [401] a woman can love deeply multiple times, whether at the same time or in succession. It often just comes down to opportunity. I know that there are eternal loves; there are loves for which no substitute exists. But these supreme, divine loves are so rare that, among ordinary people, they can often be disregarded. They belong to extraordinary individuals. Typically, a substitute can be found. The new love might never match the intensity of the original; it might never offer full or even partial satisfaction. However, it can help dull the sharp pain, act as a partial bandage for the bleeding heart, and soothe the wound even if it can’t fully heal it. This is a valuable support while the person recovers, while the fragments of a broken life start to come together, and while they solidify. Yes, someone who is suffering intensely from an unreciprocated or betrayed love should waste no time in seeking a substitute love. I don’t believe in people sacrificing their health and sanity over suffering that benefits no one.

But I will go still further. Where a substitute love—great or minor—cannot be found, then mere sex relations may help to diminish the suffering, [402]to quiet the turbulent heart, to relieve the aching brain. As everything connected with sex, so our ideas about illicit sex relations that are not connected with love, are honeycombed with hypocrisy and false to the core. While purchasable, loveless sex relations can, of course, not be compared to love relations, still under our present social, economic and moral code they are the only relations that thousands of men and women can enjoy, and they are better than none; and in quite a considerable percentage of cases an element of romance and greater or lesser permanency do become attached to them, and they act as a more or less satisfactory substitute for genuine love relations.

But I will go even further. When a substitute love—big or small—can't be found, then mere sexual relationships might help ease the pain, [402]calm the restless heart, and relieve the aching mind. Just like everything related to sex, our views on illicit sexual relationships that don't involve love are filled with hypocrisy and completely false. While transactional, loveless sexual relationships can’t really compare to loving relationships, under our current social, economic, and moral standards, they are the only connections that thousands of men and women can experience, and they’re better than nothing; plus, in quite a few cases, an element of romance and varying degrees of commitment can become attached to them, making them a more or less satisfactory substitute for true love relationships.

I am not spinning theoretical gossamer webs. I am speaking from experience—the experience of patients and confiding friends. I could relate many interesting cases. And I may, in a more appropriate volume. Here one or two will have to suffice.

I’m not just weaving theoretical ideas. I’m speaking from real experience—the experiences of patients and trusted friends. I could share many fascinating cases. I might do that in a more fitting book. For now, one or two will have to do.

He was twenty-six years old and a senior student in the College of Physicians and Surgeons, Columbia University, New York. He had been in love with and had considered himself engaged for four or five years to a young lady two years his junior. She was, of course, the most wonderful young lady in the world, the whole world; in fact, there was not another one to compare her to. She was unique; [403]she stood all alone. But for a year or so she was getting rather cool towards him; which fanned his flame all the more. And suddenly he received a note asking him not to call any more, nor to try to communicate in any other way. He did write, but his letters were returned unopened. And soon after he read of her engagement to a prominent young banker. He nearly went insane, and this is used not in any figurative sense. His insomnia was complete, and resisted all treatment. When his pulse became very rapid and his eyes acquired the wild look that they do after many sleepless nights an attempt was made to administer hypnotics, but they had practically no effect. Chloral, veronal, etc., only made him "dopy," irritable and depressed, but did not give him one hour of sound sleep. His appetite was gone, now and then his limbs would twitch, and he would sit and stare into space for hours at a time. To study or attend the clinics was out of the question, and he did not even attempt to take the final examinations. The parents felt distressed, but were unable to do anything for him. The least attempt at interference on their part, any attempt to console him, to induce him to pull himself together, made him more irritable, more morose; so that they finally left him alone. He was practically a total abstainer, but one evening he went out and came home drunk; [404]and after that he drank frequently and heavily. His parents could do nothing with him. One evening on Broadway he was accosted by a young street-walker. She had a pleasant, sympathetic face, and he went with her. That was his first sex experience. Up to that time he was chaste. He met her again the following evening. Gradually a sort of friendship grew up between them. She found out the cause of his grief, and with maternal solicitude she tried everything in her power to console him, and he began to look forward to the nightly meeting with her. His grief became gradually less acute, he gave up drinking, which he disliked, and which he had taken up only to deaden his pain; he began to pull himself together, and in six or eight months he took over his last year in Columbia and was properly graduated. He kept up the friendship with the girl for over two years, when she died of pneumonia. He did not love her, but he liked to be with her, as her presence gave him physical and mental comfort. It is possible that she loved him genuinely, but there was never any sentimental talk between them, and there was never any question between them of the permanency of the relationship. They both knew that it was temporary. But he is absolutely certain that but for one of the representatives of the class that is despised, driven about and persecuted by brutal [405]policemen and ignorant judges, he would have become a bum, or, most likely, he would have committed suicide—at the point of which he was several times; only pity for his mother and sisters restrained him.

He was twenty-six years old and a senior student at Columbia University's College of Physicians and Surgeons in New York. He had been in love with a young woman two years younger than him and considered himself engaged to her for about four or five years. She was, of course, the most incredible young woman in the entire world; in fact, there was no one else to compare her to. She was one of a kind; [403]she stood out completely. However, over the past year, she had been growing increasingly distant towards him, which only intensified his feelings. Then, out of nowhere, he received a note telling him not to contact her anymore or try to communicate in any way. He did write to her, but his letters were returned unopened. Soon after, he read about her engagement to a well-known young banker. He nearly lost his mind, and I mean that literally. His insomnia was complete and resisted all treatment. When his heart rate became very fast and his eyes took on the wild look that comes after many sleepless nights, an attempt was made to give him hypnotics, but they barely worked. Chloral, veronal, etc., only made him "dopy," irritable, and depressed, and not a single hour of sound sleep came from those. His appetite vanished, and occasionally his limbs would twitch, while he would spend hours simply staring into space. Studying or attending clinics was impossible, and he didn't even try to take his final exams. His parents felt helpless, unable to do anything for him. Any effort on their part to interfere, console him, or encourage him to get it together only made him more irritable and morose, so they ultimately left him alone. He was nearly a complete abstainer, but one evening he went out and came home drunk; [404]and afterward, he frequently drank heavily. His parents were powerless to help him. One evening on Broadway, he was approached by a young streetwalker. She had a pleasant, sympathetic face, and he went with her. That was his first sexual experience. Until then, he had been chaste. He saw her again the next evening. Gradually, a sort of friendship developed between them. She learned about the source of his pain, and with a maternal concern, tried everything she could to comfort him, and he started looking forward to their nightly meetings. His grief began to lessen, he stopped drinking, which he did not enjoy and had only taken up to numb his pain; he started to get his life back on track, and in six or eight months, he returned for his final year at Columbia and graduated properly. He maintained his friendship with the girl for over two years until she died from pneumonia. He didn’t love her, but he enjoyed her company, as it brought him both physical and mental comfort. It’s possible that she genuinely loved him, but they never had any sentimental conversations, and there was never any question between them about the permanence of their relationship. They both understood that it was temporary. But he is absolutely sure that without the support of someone from that class who is marginalized, abused, and persecuted by brutal [405]police officers and ignorant judges, he would have become a bum, or most likely, he would have committed suicide—something he came very close to several times; only his concern for his mother and sisters held him back.

And here is another case. A girl about twenty-eight years of age fell in love with a man four or five years her senior. The love seemed to be reciprocated, and they soon became engaged to be married. He asked that the engagement, on account of certain business reasons, be kept secret. She did not know the man well; she had met him at several entertainments and church affairs and he seemed very nice. He always found some excuses for delaying the marriage, and after they had been engaged about a year he began to insist on sex relations. Though of a refined and noble character, she was of a passionate nature and she did not offer much resistance. Many girls who would under no circumstance indulge in illicit relations, considering it a great sin, have no compunctions about having relations with their fiancés. They lived together for about a year. They were together almost daily, except now and then, when he would go away for a week or two on business. Once he went away—and never came back. He wrote to her that their relations were at an end; that he was a married [406]man and a father of children; he had hoped he might get a divorce, but that now he had changed his mind and that she must forget him, etc. Everything was black before her. It cost her a supreme effort not to faint, and she was supported in this effort by the fact that when the letter came she was in the presence of friends; a terrible, overpowering, all-inundating sense of shame gave her the strength not to betray her condition and her story before the world at large. But as soon as she was alone she collapsed completely. There was the most absolute insomnia imaginable, complete anorexia, but the most distressing features were frequent fainting spells, severe palpitation of the heart and tremors. She had no love for the man—so she said. Her love had turned to hatred and contempt—but the jealousy was all-consuming. Like a fire it was burning in her, searing her brain and her soul day and night.

And here’s another situation. A girl around twenty-eight fell for a man who was four or five years older. Their feelings seemed mutual, and they quickly got engaged. He asked her to keep the engagement a secret for certain business reasons. She didn’t know him well; they had met at a few social events and church gatherings, and he seemed really nice. He kept coming up with excuses to delay the wedding, and after about a year of being engaged, he started pushing for sex. Although she had a refined and noble character, she was passionate and didn’t resist much. Many girls who would never consider having illicit relationships, viewing it as a serious sin, have no qualms about being intimate with their fiancés. They lived together for about a year. They were nearly always together, except for the times he would leave for a week or two on business. Then he went away—and never returned. He wrote her saying their relationship was over; that he was a married [406] man with kids; he had hoped to get a divorce, but had changed his mind and she needed to move on, etc. Everything felt bleak for her. It took all her strength not to faint, and when she received the letter, she was with friends, which helped her maintain her composure in front of them. A crush of shame overwhelmed her, giving her the strength to hide her condition and story from the outside world. But as soon as she was alone, she completely fell apart. She experienced the worst insomnia imaginable and lost her appetite completely; the most distressing effects were frequent fainting spells, severe heart palpitations, and tremors. She claimed to have no love for the man anymore. Her love had turned into hatred and contempt—but the jealousy consumed her. It was like a fire burning inside her, searing her mind and soul day and night.

She felt that she was not strong enough to stand this physical and mental torture, and so she decided to commit suicide. As the means she selected gas. Fortunately, the smell became perceptible before the injury was irreparable. She was saved. But she felt that she could not stand the torture very long—and more than anything was she afraid that her mind would give way. She had a special horror of [407]insanity. And so she decided to make another attempt This time with bichloride. Again she was saved. A friend of hers then got an inkling of the events that were transpiring, and she introduced her to some gentlemen friends. They were nice people and more or less radical on the sex question. In order to drown her pain she began to go out very frequently with that crowd, and to her surprise and delight she found that she soon began to think less and less about her contemptible seducer, and, what was more important to her, she was soon able to sleep. For about six months she led an extremely active, almost promiscuous sex life. But then she gave it up, as she felt herself normal and no longer in need of it. She is now happily married.

She felt that she wasn't strong enough to handle the physical and mental pain, so she decided to end her life. She chose to use gas. Fortunately, she noticed the smell before it was too late. She was saved. But she felt like she couldn't endure the suffering much longer—and more than anything, she was afraid her mind would break. She had a deep fear of [407] insanity. So, she decided to try again, this time with bichloride. Once again, she was saved. A friend of hers then got wind of what was going on and introduced her to some male friends. They were nice and somewhat progressive about sex. To escape her pain, she started going out with them frequently, and to her surprise and happiness, she found that she began to think less about her despicable seducer, and more importantly, she was soon able to sleep. For about six months, she led a very active, almost promiscuous sex life. But then she stopped, feeling normal again and no longer needing it. She is now happily married.

I am through with this rather lengthy essay on one of the most painful manifestations of human emotional life. I repeat that I am aware that feelings are often stronger than reason; but saying this does not mean asserting that feelings cannot be modified and held in check by reason. And I feel confident that a careful, open-minded reading of these pages and an acceptance of the ideas therein promulgated would aid in preventing a good deal of the misery of jealousy and in curing a certain proportion of it after it has found lodgment in the hearts of unhappy men and women.

I’m done with this rather long essay on one of the most painful aspects of human emotions. I want to emphasize that I know feelings can often overpower reason; however, acknowledging this doesn’t mean I believe feelings can’t be adjusted and controlled by reason. I’m convinced that a thoughtful, open-minded reading of these pages and an acceptance of the ideas presented here would help in preventing much of the suffering caused by jealousy and in addressing some of it after it has taken root in the hearts of unhappy people.

[408]There are one or two more points that might be touched upon, but with the freedom of press in reference to sex matters as it exists in this country to-day, I have said all that I could say.

[408]There are a couple more points that could be addressed, but given the current state of press freedom regarding sex issues in this country, I've shared everything I can.







Chapter Fifty-threeToC

CONCLUDING WORDS


It is my sincere belief—and I cherish the belief in spite of this horrible, wretched war which seems to be shattering the very foundations of everything that we hold dear, destroying all the humane and moral achievements that have been laboriously built up in the course of many centuries—that the time will come when the world will be practically free from pain and suffering. Almost all disease will be conquered, accidents will be rare, the fear of starvation or poverty or unemployment will no longer haunt men and women, every infant born will be well-born and welcome, and the numerous anxieties and ambitions that now disturb the lives of so many of the earth's inhabitants will no longer plague us. They will be the dead memories of a dead and forgotten past.

I genuinely believe—and I hold onto this belief despite this awful, devastating war that seems to be tearing apart everything we cherish, erasing all the humane and moral progress we've painstakingly built over centuries—that the day will come when the world will be mostly free from pain and suffering. Almost all diseases will be eradicated, accidents will be uncommon, and people will no longer live in fear of hunger, poverty, or joblessness. Every baby born will be healthy and welcomed, and the many worries and ambitions that currently disrupt the lives of so many will no longer trouble us. They will be nothing but distant memories of a past long forgotten.

Yes, I believe that the time will come when the world will be practically free from pain and suffering. But there is one exception. I do not believe that we will ever be able entirely to eliminate the tragedies of the heart. For our physical ills, which [410]will be few in number, there will be a socialized medical profession; everywhere there will be free hospitals and convalescent homes. The unemployment problem will be dealt with by the State, and dealt with so that there will be no unemployment problem. There will be work for everybody and everybody will do the work which he finds most congenial. But the State, I fear, will be able to do nothing in affairs of the heart. When John loves Mary with every fiber of his soul, and Mary remains completely indifferent, then no State physician and no Government official will be able to offer any balm or consolation to poor John. And if Mary loves Robert, and Robert behaves so that he breaks Mary's heart, then no official glue will put it together and no convalescent home will make it whole.

Yes, I believe that a time will come when the world will be nearly free from pain and suffering. However, there's one exception. I don't think we'll ever completely eliminate the tragedies of the heart. For our physical ailments, which [410] will be few, there will be a public healthcare system; there will be free hospitals and recovery facilities everywhere. The unemployment issue will be tackled by the government, and it will be handled in such a way that unemployment will no longer exist. Everyone will have a job, and everyone will do the work they find most fulfilling. But, sadly, the government won't be able to help with matters of the heart. When John loves Mary with every fiber of his being, and Mary remains completely indifferent, no government doctor and no official will be able to provide comfort or healing for poor John. And if Mary loves Robert, and Robert acts in a way that breaks Mary's heart, no official remedy will fix it, and no recovery center will make it whole again.

Yes, I believe that love pangs and tragedies of the heart will cause mortal men and women suffering even under the most perfect social regime. But I also believe that these pangs will be less acute, that the suffering will be less cruel than it is now.

Yes, I believe that heartaches and heartbreaks will make people suffer even in the best social system. But I also believe that these heartaches will hurt less and that the suffering will be less harsh than it is now.

Proper ideas about love, freer intercourse between the sexes, a normal and regular sex life, a saner attitude towards many things which are now unjustly considered shameful or criminal will, to a large degree, prevent the heart tragedies and facilitate their cure where they cannot be prevented.

Proper ideas about love, more open interaction between the sexes, a normal and healthy sex life, and a more rational attitude towards many things that are currently wrongfully seen as shameful or criminal will, to a significant extent, help prevent heartbreak and make it easier to heal when it can't be avoided.

[411]And it is the duty of everybody who loves mankind to study the various phases of human sexuality and help to spread sane and humane ideas on the subject of Sex and Love.

[411]It's everyone's responsibility who cares about humanity to explore the different aspects of human sexuality and promote healthy and compassionate views on the topics of Sex and Love.

The author trusts that Woman: Her Sex and Love Life will help, in some slight degree, in spreading healthy, sane and honest ideas about sex among the men and women of America.

The author believes that Woman: Her Sexual and Romantic Relationships will contribute, even just a little, to promoting healthy, sensible, and honest views about sex among the men and women of America.


THE END







SEXUAL TRUTHS

VERSUS

SEXUAL LIES, MISCONCEPTIONS AND
EXAGGERATIONS

By WILLIAM J. ROBINSON, M.D.

This book effectually demolishes the numerous lies and senseless exaggerations which dabblers in sexology, either through ignorance or design, are offering to the public, and which are responsible for so much physical misery and mental agony. In Dr. Robinson's best vein: clear, concise and incisive. With each sledge-hammer blow of his logic a lie is demolished, with each turn of the rays of reason a dark place is illumined, with each dialectic pull a century-old superstition is uprooted.

This book effectively dismantles the many falsehoods and ridiculous exaggerations that those with a casual interest in sexology, either out of ignorance or intention, are presenting to the public, which have caused a lot of physical pain and mental suffering. In Dr. Robinson's signature style: clear, straightforward, and sharp. With each powerful argument he makes, a lie is shattered, with each illumination of reason, a dark area is lit up, and with each logical debate, a century-old superstition is torn away.

Contains several important articles from the pens of the world's greatest sexologists.

Contains several important articles from the world's leading sex experts.

Price, $5.00

Price: $5.00



SEX MORALITY, PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE

A frank and open discussion of sex morality as it was, as it is, and most important, as it is likely to be in the near and in the distant future.—Price, $2.00.

A straightforward and honest conversation about sexual morality—how it was, how it is, and most importantly, how it’s likely to be in the near and distant future.—Price, $2.00.



STEKEL'S ESSAYS ON SEX AND PSYCHOANALYSIS

While we are far from agreeing with everything this author has written, this book contains some of his most interesting, most important and most thought-provoking essays.—Price, $5.00.

While we don’t agree with everything this author has written, this book includes some of his most interesting, important, and thought-provoking essays. —Price, $5.00.

EUGENICS PUBLISHING CO., 250 W. 54th Street, New York





SEXUAL PROBLEMS
OF TODAY

By WILLIAM J. ROBINSON, M.D.

Dr. Robinson's work deals with many phases of the sex question, both in their individual and social aspects. In this book the scientific knowledge of a physician, eminent as a specialist in everything pertaining to the physiological and medical side of these topics, is combined with the vigorous social views of a thinker who has radical ideas and is not afraid to give them outspoken expression.

Dr. Robinson's work addresses various aspects of sexuality, both individually and socially. In this book, the scientific expertise of a doctor, renowned as a specialist in all things related to the physiological and medical aspects of these topics, is combined with the bold social perspectives of a thinker who holds radical views and isn’t afraid to express them openly.

A few of the subjects which the author discusses in trenchant fashion are:

A few of the topics that the author talks about in a sharp manner are:

The Relations Between the Sexes and Man's Inhumanity to Woman.—The Influence of Abstinence on Man's Sexual Health and Sexual Power.—The Double Standard of Morality and the Effect of Continence on Each Sex.—The Limitation of Offspring: the Most Important Immediate Step for the Betterment of the Human Race, from an Economic and Eugenic Standpoint.—What To Do With the Prostitute and How To Abolish Venereal Disease.—The Question of Abortion Considered In Its Ethical and Social Aspects.—Torturing the Wife When the Husband Is At Fault.—Influence of the Prostate on Man's Mental Condition.—The Most Efficient Venereal Prophylactics, etc., etc.

The Relationships Between Genders and Men's Cruelty Toward Women.—How Abstinence Affects Men's Sexual Health and Abilities.—The Double Standard of Morality and How Continence Impacts Each Gender.—Limiting Offspring: The Most Crucial Immediate Step for Improving the Human Race, from Both Economic and Eugenic Perspectives.—Addressing the Issues of Prostitution and How to Eliminate Sexually Transmitted Diseases.—The Ethical and Social Considerations of Abortion.—Putting Blame on the Wife When the Husband Is At Fault.—The Impact of the Prostate on Men's Mental Health.—The Most Effective Methods of Preventing Venereal Diseases, etc., etc.

"SEXUAL PROBLEMS OF TO-DAY" will give most of its readers information they never possessed before and ideas they never had before—or if they had, never heard them publicly expressed before.

"SEXUAL PROBLEMS OF TODAY" will provide most of its readers with information they’ve never had before and ideas they’ve never considered—or if they did, they’ve never heard them openly discussed before.


Cloth-bound, 320 Pages, $2 Postpaid

Hardcover, 320 Pages, $2 Shipping Included


EUGENICS PUBLISHING COMPANY
250 W. 54th STREET      NEW YORK





Eleventh Edition—Just Off the Press

11th Edition—Just Released

SEXUAL IMPOTENCE

A Practical Treatise on the Causes, Symptoms and Treatment of Sexual Impotence and Other Sexual Disorders in Men and Women

A Practical Guide to the Causes, Symptoms, and Treatment of Sexual Impotence and Other Sexual Disorders in Men and Women

By WILLIAM J. ROBINSON, M.D.

Chief of the Department of Genito-Urinary Diseases and Dermatology, Bronx Hospital and Dispensary; Editor of "The Critic and Guide"; Editor of "The Journal of Sexology"; Author of "The Treatment of Gonorrhea", "Woman: Her Sex and Love Life", etc.; Fellow of the New York Academy of Medicine; Member of the American Urological Association, etc.

Chief of the Department of Genito-Urinary Diseases and Dermatology, Bronx Hospital and Dispensary; Editor of "The Critic and Guide"; Editor of "The Journal of Sexology"; Author of "The Treatment of Gonorrhea," "Woman: Her Sex and Love Life," and more; Fellow of the New York Academy of Medicine; Member of the American Urological Association, and others.

Eleventh Edition, revised and enlarged, 502 pages.
Illustrated. Price, $5.00.

Eleventh Edition, updated and expanded, 502 pages.
Illustrated. Price, $5.00.

The eleventh edition has just come off the press. Dr. Robinson has taken advantage of the opportunity to subject the entire book to a thorough revision, and has added a number of chapters dealing with gland transplantation, endocrinology, the Steinach operation, and containing additional case reports, comments and explanations.

The eleventh edition has just been published. Dr. Robinson has taken the chance to thoroughly revise the entire book and has added several chapters on gland transplantation, endocrinology, the Steinach operation, as well as more case reports, comments, and explanations.

Those who know the book consider it the best of its kind in any language. Its outstanding features are its "practicalness", and its bright, easy, vivacious style. Every chapter is full of practical points, of easily applicable advice; it is entirely free from any fads and mysterious methods of treatment, any hints at hocus-pocus. It is a sane, rational, common-sense book. Every physician who will make a study of this book will become a better physician in general, and will certainly be able to treat his sexual cases with better success.

Those who are familiar with the book believe it to be the best of its kind in any language. Its standout features are its practicality and its lively, accessible style. Each chapter is packed with practical insights and easy-to-follow advice; it avoids any trends or mysterious treatment methods and steers clear of any gimmicks. It’s a sensible, rational, common-sense book. Every doctor who studies this book will become a better physician overall and will definitely be more successful in treating sexual health cases.


EUGENICS PUBLISHING CO., 250 W. 54th Street, New York





I consider myself extremely fortunate in having been instrumental in making this remarkable book accessible to the English reading public. It is a great book well worth a careful perusal.

I feel really lucky to have played a part in making this amazing book available to English readers. It's a fantastic book that's definitely worth taking the time to read.

From Dr. William J. Robinson's Introduction.

From Dr. William J. Robinson's Introduction.

The Sexual Crisis

A CRITIQUE OF OUR SEX LIFE
A Psychologic and Sociologic Study
By GRETE MEISEL-HESS

AUTHORIZED TRANSLATION BY EDEN AND CEDAR PAUL

AUTHORIZED TRANSLATION BY EDEN AND CEDAR PAUL

EDITED, WITH AN INTRODUCTION

Edited with an Introduction

By WILLIAM J. ROBINSON, M.D.

One of the greatest of all books on the sex question that have appeared in the Twentieth Century.

One of the best books on the topic of sex to come out in the twentieth century.

It is a book that no educated man or woman, lay or professional, interested in sexual ethics, in our marriage system, in free motherhood, in trial marriages, in the question of sexual abstinence, etc., etc., can afford to leave unread. Nobody who discusses, writes or lectures on any phases of the sex question, has a right to overlook this remarkable volume. Written with a wonderfully keen analysis of the conditions which are bringing about a sexual crisis, the book abounds in gems of thought and in pearls of style on every page. It must be read to be appreciated.

It’s a book that no educated person, whether they’re a layman or a professional, interested in sexual ethics, our marriage system, free motherhood, trial marriages, sexual abstinence, and so on, can afford to skip. Anyone who talks, writes, or lectures about any aspect of the sex question shouldn't overlook this remarkable book. It’s written with a sharp analysis of the conditions leading to a sexual crisis, and it has insightful ideas and beautifully crafted sentences on every page. You have to read it to really appreciate it.

A Complete Synopsis of Contents Will Be Sent on Request

A complete synopsis of the contents will be sent upon request.

360 PAGES. PRICE $3.00

360 PAGES. PRICE $3.00


EUGENICS PUBLISHING COMPANY 250 W. 54th STREET NEW YORK




Typographical errors corrected in text:

Typo corrections made in text:


Page  12:  Formulae replaced with Formulæ
Page  13:  Formulae replaced with Formulæ
Page  18:  Spirtual replaced with Spiritual
Page  36:  Fallopion replaced with Fallopian
Page  48:  vertebae replaced with vertebræ
Page  84:  Spermatozoon replaced with Spermatozoön
Page  86:  sixy-four replaced with sixty-four
Page 158:  Formulae replaced with Formulæ
Page 336:  Consideraations replaced with Considerations

 

 



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