This is a modern-English version of The Hungry Stones, and Other Stories, originally written by Tagore, Rabindranath. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

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THE HUNGRY STONES

AND OTHER STORIES



By Rabindranath Tagore










Contents






Preface:

The stories contained in this volume were translated by several hands. The version of The Victory is the author's own work. The seven stories which follow were translated by Mr. C. F. Andrews, with the help of the author's help. Assistance has also been given by the Rev. E. J. Thompson, Panna Lal Basu, Prabhat Kumar Mukerjii, and the Sister Nivedita.

The stories in this book were translated by various people. The version of The Victory is the author’s own work. The seven stories that come next were translated by Mr. C. F. Andrews, with the author’s assistance. Help was also provided by Rev. E. J. Thompson, Panna Lal Basu, Prabhat Kumar Mukerjii, and Sister Nivedita.






THE HUNGRY STONES

My kinsman and myself were returning to Calcutta from our Puja trip when we met the man in a train. From his dress and bearing we took him at first for an up-country Mahomedan, but we were puzzled as we heard him talk. He discoursed upon all subjects so confidently that you might think the Disposer of All Things consulted him at all times in all that He did. Hitherto we had been perfectly happy, as we did not know that secret and unheard-of forces were at work, that the Russians had advanced close to us, that the English had deep and secret policies, that confusion among the native chiefs had come to a head. But our newly-acquired friend said with a sly smile: "There happen more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are reported in your newspapers." As we had never stirred out of our homes before, the demeanour of the man struck us dumb with wonder. Be the topic ever so trivial, he would quote science, or comment on the Vedas, or repeat quatrains from some Persian poet; and as we had no pretence to a knowledge of science or the Vedas or Persian, our admiration for him went on increasing, and my kinsman, a theosophist, was firmly convinced that our fellow-passenger must have been supernaturally inspired by some strange "magnetism" or "occult power," by an "astral body" or something of that kind. He listened to the tritest saying that fell from the lips of our extraordinary companion with devotional rapture, and secretly took down notes of his conversation. I fancy that the extraordinary man saw this, and was a little pleased with it.

My relative and I were traveling back to Calcutta from our Puja trip when we met a man on the train. At first, we thought he was an up-country Muslim based on his appearance and demeanor, but we were puzzled when we heard him speak. He talked about everything so confidently that you might think the Creator consulted him about everything He did. Until then, we had been completely happy, unaware that strange and unknown forces were at play—that the Russians were advancing close to us, that the British had deep, secret agendas, and that chaos among the local leaders had reached a breaking point. But our new friend said with a sly smile, "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are reported in your newspapers." Since we had never ventured out of our homes before, this man's demeanor left us in awe. No matter how trivial the topic, he would quote science, comment on the Vedas, or recite verses from a Persian poet; and since we had no claim to knowledge of science, the Vedas, or Persian, our admiration for him only grew. My relative, a theosophist, was convinced that our fellow passenger must have been supernaturally inspired by some strange "magnetism" or "occult power," by an "astral body," or something like that. He listened with reverent admiration to the simplest things our extraordinary companion said and secretly took notes of his conversation. I suspect that the remarkable man noticed this and was a little pleased by it.

When the train reached the junction, we assembled in the waiting room for the connection. It was then 10 P.M., and as the train, we heard, was likely to be very late, owing to something wrong in the lines, I spread my bed on the table and was about to lie down for a comfortable doze, when the extraordinary person deliberately set about spinning the following yarn. Of course, I could get no sleep that night.

When the train arrived at the junction, we gathered in the waiting room for the connection. It was 10 P.M., and since we heard the train would likely be very late due to some issues on the tracks, I spread my bed on the table and was about to lie down for a nice nap when the unusual person started telling the following story. Of course, I couldn't get any sleep that night.

When, owing to a disagreement about some questions of administrative policy, I threw up my post at Junagarh, and entered the service of the Nizam of Hydria, they appointed me at once, as a strong young man, collector of cotton duties at Barich.

When, due to a disagreement over some administrative policy issues, I resigned from my position in Junagarh and joined the service of the Nizam of Hyderabad, they quickly appointed me, as a capable young man, as the collector of cotton duties in Barich.

Barich is a lovely place. The Susta "chatters over stony ways and babbles on the pebbles," tripping, like a skilful dancing girl, in through the woods below the lonely hills. A flight of 150 steps rises from the river, and above that flight, on the river's brim and at the foot of the hills, there stands a solitary marble palace. Around it there is no habitation of man—the village and the cotton mart of Barich being far off.

Barich is a beautiful place. The Susta "chats over rocky paths and babbles over the pebbles," dancing gracefully like a skilled performer as it flows through the woods below the quiet hills. A set of 150 steps rises from the river, and at the top of those steps, right at the water's edge and at the base of the hills, stands a solitary marble palace. There’s no human settlement nearby—the village and cotton market of Barich are far away.

About 250 years ago the Emperor Mahmud Shah II. had built this lonely palace for his pleasure and luxury. In his days jets of rose-water spurted from its fountains, and on the cold marble floors of its spray-cooled rooms young Persian damsels would sit, their hair dishevelled before bathing, and, splashing their soft naked feet in the clear water of the reservoirs, would sing, to the tune of the guitar, the ghazals of their vineyards.

About 250 years ago, Emperor Mahmud Shah II built this lonely palace for his enjoyment and luxury. In his time, jets of rose water shot up from its fountains, and on the cool marble floors of its mist-cooled rooms, young Persian girls would sit with their hair tousled before bathing, splashing their delicate bare feet in the clear water of the pools, singing the ghazals of their vineyards to the tune of the guitar.

The fountains play no longer; the songs have ceased; no longer do snow-white feet step gracefully on the snowy marble. It is but the vast and solitary quarters of cess-collectors like us, men oppressed with solitude and deprived of the society of women. Now, Karim Khan, the old clerk of my office, warned me repeatedly not to take up my abode there. "Pass the day there, if you like," said he, "but never stay the night." I passed it off with a light laugh. The servants said that they would work till dark and go away at night. I gave my ready assent. The house had such a bad name that even thieves would not venture near it after dark.

The fountains have stopped running; the music has ended; there are no more snow-white feet dancing gracefully on the white marble. Now it's just the vast and lonely quarters of cess-collectors like us, men weighed down by loneliness and lacking the company of women. Karim Khan, the old clerk from my office, kept warning me not to stay there. "You can spend the day there if you want," he said, "but never stay the night." I just laughed it off. The servants said they would work until dark and leave at night. I agreed without hesitation. The house had such a terrible reputation that even thieves wouldn't dare go near it after dark.

At first the solitude of the deserted palace weighed upon me like a nightmare. I would stay out, and work hard as long as possible, then return home at night jaded and tired, go to bed and fall asleep.

At first, the emptiness of the abandoned palace felt like a nightmare pressing down on me. I would stay out and work hard for as long as I could, then come home at night, worn out and exhausted, go to bed, and fall asleep.

Before a week had passed, the place began to exert a weird fascination upon me. It is difficult to describe or to induce people to believe; but I felt as if the whole house was like a living organism slowly and imperceptibly digesting me by the action of some stupefying gastric juice.

Before a week had gone by, the place started to have a strange hold on me. It's hard to explain or get others to believe, but I felt like the whole house was a living being gradually and subtly absorbing me, like I was being broken down by some numbing digestive fluid.

Perhaps the process had begun as soon as I set my foot in the house, but I distinctly remember the day on which I first was conscious of it.

Maybe the process started the moment I stepped into the house, but I clearly remember the day I first became aware of it.

It was the beginning of summer, and the market being dull I had no work to do. A little before sunset I was sitting in an arm-chair near the water's edge below the steps. The Susta had shrunk and sunk low; a broad patch of sand on the other side glowed with the hues of evening; on this side the pebbles at the bottom of the clear shallow waters were glistening. There was not a breath of wind anywhere, and the still air was laden with an oppressive scent from the spicy shrubs growing on the hills close by.

It was the start of summer, and with the market being slow, I had nothing to do. Just before sunset, I was sitting in an armchair near the water's edge at the bottom of the steps. The Susta had receded and was low; a wide stretch of sand on the other side shimmered with the evening colors; on this side, the pebbles at the bottom of the clear, shallow water sparkled. There wasn’t a whisper of wind anywhere, and the calm air was heavy with a strong scent from the fragrant shrubs growing on the nearby hills.

As the sun sank behind the hill-tops a long dark curtain fell upon the stage of day, and the intervening hills cut short the time in which light and shade mingle at sunset. I thought of going out for a ride, and was about to get up when I heard a footfall on the steps behind. I looked back, but there was no one.

As the sun dipped below the hills, a long dark curtain came down on the day's stage, and the hills interrupted the time when light and shadow blend at sunset. I considered going out for a ride and was about to get up when I heard footsteps on the steps behind me. I turned around, but there was no one there.

As I sat down again, thinking it to be an illusion, I heard many footfalls, as if a large number of persons were rushing down the steps. A strange thrill of delight, slightly tinged with fear, passed through my frame, and though there was not a figure before my eyes, methought I saw a bevy of joyous maidens coming down the steps to bathe in the Susta in that summer evening. Not a sound was in the valley, in the river, or in the palace, to break the silence, but I distinctly heard the maidens' gay and mirthful laugh, like the gurgle of a spring gushing forth in a hundred cascades, as they ran past me, in quick playful pursuit of each other, towards the river, without noticing me at all. As they were invisible to me, so I was, as it were, invisible to them. The river was perfectly calm, but I felt that its still, shallow, and clear waters were stirred suddenly by the splash of many an arm jingling with bracelets, that the girls laughed and dashed and spattered water at one another, that the feet of the fair swimmers tossed the tiny waves up in showers of pearl.

As I sat down again, thinking it was just an illusion, I heard many footsteps, as if a large group of people were rushing down the steps. A strange thrill of delight, mixed with a bit of fear, coursed through me, and even though I couldn't see anyone, I imagined a group of joyful young women coming down the steps to swim in the Susta on that summer evening. The valley, the river, and the palace were silent, but I distinctly heard the young women's cheerful laughter, like the sound of a spring bubbling over in a hundred streams, as they ran past me, playfully chasing each other towards the river, completely unaware of my presence. Just as they were invisible to me, I was, in a way, invisible to them. The river was perfectly calm, but I sensed that its still, shallow, and clear waters were suddenly disturbed by the splashes of many arms jingling with bracelets, as the girls laughed and splashed water at each other, with the feet of the beautiful swimmers creating tiny waves that sparkled like pearls.

I felt a thrill at my heart—I cannot say whether the excitement was due to fear or delight or curiosity. I had a strong desire to see them more clearly, but naught was visible before me; I thought I could catch all that they said if I only strained my ears; but however hard I strained them, I heard nothing but the chirping of the cicadas in the woods. It seemed as if a dark curtain of 250 years was hanging before me, and I would fain lift a corner of it tremblingly and peer through, though the assembly on the other side was completely enveloped in darkness.

I felt a thrill in my chest—I can't say if it was because I was scared, excited, or curious. I really wanted to see them more clearly, but there was nothing visible in front of me; I thought I could catch everything they said if I just strained my ears, but no matter how hard I tried, all I heard was the chirping of the cicadas in the woods. It felt like a dark curtain of 250 years was hanging in front of me, and I wanted to cautiously lift a corner and peek through, even though the gathering on the other side was completely shrouded in darkness.

The oppressive closeness of the evening was broken by a sudden gust of wind, and the still surface of the Suista rippled and curled like the hair of a nymph, and from the woods wrapt in the evening gloom there came forth a simultaneous murmur, as though they were awakening from a black dream. Call it reality or dream, the momentary glimpse of that invisible mirage reflected from a far-off world, 250 years old, vanished in a flash. The mystic forms that brushed past me with their quick unbodied steps, and loud, voiceless laughter, and threw themselves into the river, did not go back wringing their dripping robes as they went. Like fragrance wafted away by the wind they were dispersed by a single breath of the spring.

The heavy heat of the evening was interrupted by a sudden gust of wind, causing the calm surface of the Suista to ripple and curl like a nymph's hair. From the shadowy woods came a soft murmur, as if they were waking up from a dark dream. Whether it was reality or fantasy, that brief glimpse of an unseen mirage from a 250-year-old world disappeared in an instant. The mysterious figures that floated past me with their quick, formless movements and silent laughter leapt into the river without turning back to wring out their wet garments. Like a fragrance carried away by the wind, they were scattered by a single breath of spring.

Then I was filled with a lively fear that it was the Muse that had taken advantage of my solitude and possessed me—the witch had evidently come to ruin a poor devil like myself making a living by collecting cotton duties. I decided to have a good dinner—it is the empty stomach that all sorts of incurable diseases find an easy prey. I sent for my cook and gave orders for a rich, sumptuous moghlai dinner, redolent of spices and ghi.

Then I was hit with a lively fear that the Muse had taken advantage of my solitude and possessed me—the witch had clearly come to ruin a poor guy like me trying to make a living collecting cotton duties. I decided to treat myself to a nice dinner—it’s the empty stomach that all kinds of incurable diseases find an easy target. I called for my cook and ordered a rich, lavish Moghlai dinner, filled with spices and ghee.

Next morning the whole affair appeared a queer fantasy. With a light heart I put on a sola hat like the sahebs, and drove out to my work. I was to have written my quarterly report that day, and expected to return late; but before it was dark I was strangely drawn to my house—by what I could not say—I felt they were all waiting, and that I should delay no longer. Leaving my report unfinished I rose, put on my sola hat, and startling the dark, shady, desolate path with the rattle of my carriage, I reached the vast silent palace standing on the gloomy skirts of the hills.

The next morning, the whole situation felt like a bizarre dream. With a light heart, I put on a sola hat like the officers do and headed out to work. I was supposed to write my quarterly report that day and thought I’d be back late; but before it got dark, I felt a strange pull to go home—something I couldn’t explain—I sensed that everyone was waiting for me, and I shouldn’t take any longer. Leaving my report unfinished, I got up, put on my sola hat, and startled the quiet, dark, empty path with the sound of my carriage, making my way to the immense, silent palace that stood in the shadow of the hills.

On the first floor the stairs led to a very spacious hall, its roof stretching wide over ornamental arches resting on three rows of massive pillars, and groaning day and night under the weight of its own intense solitude. The day had just closed, and the lamps had not yet been lighted. As I pushed the door open a great bustle seemed to follow within, as if a throng of people had broken up in confusion, and rushed out through the doors and windows and corridors and verandas and rooms, to make its hurried escape.

On the first floor, the stairs led to a large hall, its ceiling stretching wide over decorative arches supported by three rows of sturdy pillars, which seemed to groan day and night under the weight of its own deep loneliness. The day had just ended, and the lights hadn’t been turned on yet. As I pushed the door open, a loud commotion seemed to erupt inside, as if a crowd of people had erupted in chaos and rushed out through the doors, windows, corridors, verandas, and rooms to make a hasty exit.

As I saw no one I stood bewildered, my hair on end in a kind of ecstatic delight, and a faint scent of attar and unguents almost effected by age lingered in my nostrils. Standing in the darkness of that vast desolate hall between the rows of those ancient pillars, I could hear the gurgle of fountains plashing on the marble floor, a strange tune on the guitar, the jingle of ornaments and the tinkle of anklets, the clang of bells tolling the hours, the distant note of nahabat, the din of the crystal pendants of chandeliers shaken by the breeze, the song of bulbuls from the cages in the corridors, the cackle of storks in the gardens, all creating round me a strange unearthly music.

As I saw no one, I stood there confused, my hair standing on end in a kind of ecstatic delight, while a faint scent of perfume and old ointments lingered in my nostrils. Standing in the darkness of that vast, desolate hall between the rows of ancient pillars, I could hear the gurgle of fountains splashing on the marble floor, a strange tune on a guitar, the jingle of ornaments and the tinkle of anklets, the clang of bells marking the hours, the distant sound of a nahabat, the clatter of crystal pendants from chandeliers shaken by the breeze, the song of nightingales from cages in the corridors, and the cackle of storks in the gardens, all creating an eerie, otherworldly symphony around me.

Then I came under such a spell that this intangible, inaccessible, unearthly vision appeared to be the only reality in the world—and all else a mere dream. That I, that is to say, Srijut So-and-so, the eldest son of So-and-so of blessed memory, should be drawing a monthly salary of Rs. 450 by the discharge of my duties as collector of cotton duties, and driving in my dog-cart to my office every day in a short coat and soia hat, appeared to me to be such an astonishingly ludicrous illusion that I burst into a horse-laugh, as I stood in the gloom of that vast silent hall.

Then I fell under such a spell that this intangible, unreachable, otherworldly vision seemed to be the only reality in existence—and everything else felt like a mere dream. The fact that I, Srijut So-and-so, the eldest son of So-and-so of blessed memory, was earning a monthly salary of Rs. 450 by performing my duties as the collector of cotton duties, and driving to my office every day in a dog-cart while wearing a short coat and a soia hat, seemed like such an absurd illusion that I burst into a hearty laugh as I stood in the shadows of that vast, silent hall.

At that moment my servant entered with a lighted kerosene lamp in his hand. I do not know whether he thought me mad, but it came back to me at once that I was in very deed Srijut So-and-so, son of So-and-so of blessed memory, and that, while our poets, great and small, alone could say whether inside of or outside the earth there was a region where unseen fountains perpetually played and fairy guitars, struck by invisible fingers, sent forth an eternal harmony, this at any rate was certain, that I collected duties at the cotton market at Banch, and earned thereby Rs. 450 per mensem as my salary. I laughed in great glee at my curious illusion, as I sat over the newspaper at my camp-table, lighted by the kerosene lamp.

At that moment, my servant walked in with a lighted kerosene lamp in hand. I’m not sure if he thought I was crazy, but it suddenly hit me that I was indeed Srijut So-and-so, son of So-and-so of blessed memory. While our poets, both great and small, could only speculate about whether there were places beyond our earth where unseen fountains flowed and fairy guitars, played by invisible hands, created timeless music, one thing was certain: I collected duties at the cotton market in Banch and earned Rs. 450 a month as my salary. I laughed heartily at my strange illusion as I sat at my camp table reading the newspaper, illuminated by the kerosene lamp.

After I had finished my paper and eaten my moghlai dinner, I put out the lamp, and lay down on my bed in a small side-room. Through the open window a radiant star, high above the Avalli hills skirted by the darkness of their woods, was gazing intently from millions and millions of miles away in the sky at Mr. Collector lying on a humble camp-bedstead. I wondered and felt amused at the idea, and do not knew when I fell asleep or how long I slept; but I suddenly awoke with a start, though I heard no sound and saw no intruder—only the steady bright star on the hilltop had set, and the dim light of the new moon was stealthily entering the room through the open window, as if ashamed of its intrusion.

After I finished my paper and had my moghlai dinner, I turned off the lamp and lay down on my bed in a small side room. Through the open window, a bright star, high above the Avalli hills surrounded by the darkness of their woods, was staring intently from millions of miles away at Mr. Collector lying on a simple camp bed. I found the thought amusing and lost track of when I fell asleep or how long I was out; but I suddenly woke up with a jolt, though I heard no noise and saw no one—only the steady bright star on the hilltop had set, and the soft light of the new moon was quietly coming into the room through the open window, as if it were embarrassed to intrude.

I saw nobody, but felt as if some one was gently pushing me. As I awoke she said not a word, but beckoned me with her five fingers bedecked with rings to follow her cautiously. I got up noiselessly, and, though not a soul save myself was there in the countless apartments of that deserted palace with its slumbering sounds and waiting echoes, I feared at every step lest any one should wake up. Most of the rooms of the palace were always kept closed, and I had never entered them.

I didn't see anyone, but I felt like someone was gently pushing me. When I woke up, she didn't say anything, but waved me over with her ring-covered fingers to follow her quietly. I got up silently, and even though I was the only one in the many empty rooms of that abandoned palace filled with soft sounds and lingering echoes, I was scared to make a noise in case someone woke up. Most of the palace's rooms were always kept shut, and I had never gone into them.

I followed breathless and with silent steps my invisible guide—I cannot now say where. What endless dark and narrow passages, what long corridors, what silent and solemn audience-chambers and close secret cells I crossed!

I followed breathlessly and quietly behind my unseen guide—I can't say where now. What endless dark and narrow passages, what long corridors, what silent and solemn audience chambers and tight secret cells I went through!

Though I could not see my fair guide, her form was not invisible to my mind's eye,—an Arab girl, her arms, hard and smooth as marble, visible through her loose sleeves, a thin veil falling on her face from the fringe of her cap, and a curved dagger at her waist! Methought that one of the thousand and one Arabian Nights had been wafted to me from the world of romance, and that at the dead of night I was wending my way through the dark narrow alleys of slumbering Bagdad to a trysting-place fraught with peril.

Though I couldn't see my lovely guide, her figure was clear in my imagination—an Arab girl, her arms hard and smooth like marble, visible through her loose sleeves, a thin veil draping over her face from the edge of her cap, and a curved dagger at her waist! It felt like one of the tales from the thousand and one Arabian Nights had come to life, and in the dead of night, I was making my way through the dark, narrow streets of sleepy Bagdad to a dangerous meeting spot.

At last my fair guide stopped abruptly before a deep blue screen, and seemed to point to something below. There was nothing there, but a sudden dread froze the blood in my heart-methought I saw there on the floor at the foot of the screen a terrible negro eunuch dressed in rich brocade, sitting and dozing with outstretched legs, with a naked sword on his lap. My fair guide lightly tripped over his legs and held up a fringe of the screen. I could catch a glimpse of a part of the room spread with a Persian carpet—some one was sitting inside on a bed—I could not see her, but only caught a glimpse of two exquisite feet in gold-embroidered slippers, hanging out from loose saffron-coloured paijamas and placed idly on the orange-coloured velvet carpet. On one side there was a bluish crystal tray on which a few apples, pears, oranges, and bunches of grapes in plenty, two small cups and a gold-tinted decanter were evidently waiting the guest. A fragrant intoxicating vapour, issuing from a strange sort of incense that burned within, almost overpowered my senses.

Finally, my beautiful guide suddenly stopped in front of a deep blue screen and seemed to point to something below. There was nothing there, but an overwhelming dread froze my heart— I thought I saw a terrifying black eunuch dressed in rich brocade sitting and dozing with his legs stretched out, a naked sword resting on his lap. My beautiful guide lightly stepped over his legs and lifted a fringe of the screen. I caught a glimpse of part of the room covered with a Persian carpet—someone was sitting on a bed inside—I couldn’t see her, but I glimpsed two exquisite feet in gold-embroidered slippers, hanging out from loose saffron-colored pajamas and placed idly on the orange velvet carpet. On one side, there was a bluish crystal tray with a few apples, pears, oranges, and plenty of grapes, along with two small cups and a gold-tinted decanter, clearly waiting for the guest. A fragrant, intoxicating vapor from a strange type of incense that was burning inside almost overwhelmed my senses.

As with trembling heart I made an attempt to step across the outstretched legs of the eunuch, he woke up suddenly with a start, and the sword fell from his lap with a sharp clang on the marble floor. A terrific scream made me jump, and I saw I was sitting on that camp-bedstead of mine sweating heavily; and the crescent moon looked pale in the morning light like a weary sleepless patient at dawn; and our crazy Meher Ali was crying out, as is his daily custom, "Stand back! Stand back!!" while he went along the lonely road.

As I nervously tried to step over the outstretched legs of the eunuch, he suddenly woke up with a jolt, and his sword clanged sharply to the marble floor. A terrifying scream startled me, and I realized I was sitting on my camp bed, sweating heavily. The crescent moon appeared pale in the morning light, like a tired insomniac at dawn. Meanwhile, our eccentric Meher Ali was shouting, as he often does, "Stand back! Stand back!!" as he walked down the lonely road.

Such was the abrupt close of one of my Arabian Nights; but there were yet a thousand nights left.

Such was the sudden ending of one of my Arabian Nights; but there were still a thousand nights to go.

Then followed a great discord between my days and nights. During the day I would go to my work worn and tired, cursing the bewitching night and her empty dreams, but as night came my daily life with its bonds and shackles of work would appear a petty, false, ludicrous vanity.

Then came a big conflict between my days and nights. During the day, I would go to work worn out and tired, cursing the enchanting night and its empty dreams. But as night fell, my daily life with its work's chains and constraints seemed trivial, fake, and absurd.

After nightfall I was caught and overwhelmed in the snare of a strange intoxication, I would then be transformed into some unknown personage of a bygone age, playing my part in unwritten history; and my short English coat and tight breeches did not suit me in the least. With a red velvet cap on my head, loose paijamas, an embroidered vest, a long flowing silk gown, and coloured handkerchiefs scented with attar, I would complete my elaborate toilet, sit on a high-cushioned chair, and replace my cigarette with a many-coiled narghileh filled with rose-water, as if in eager expectation of a strange meeting with the beloved one.

After dark, I found myself caught up in a strange intoxication, transforming into some unknown character from a past era, playing my role in unwritten history; my short English coat and tight breeches didn't fit me at all. With a red velvet cap on my head, loose pajamas, an embroidered vest, a long flowing silk gown, and colorful handkerchiefs scented with attar, I would finish my elaborate look, sit in a high-cushioned chair, and swap my cigarette for a coiled narghileh filled with rose-water, as if eagerly anticipating a mysterious meeting with my beloved.

I have no power to describe the marvellous incidents that unfolded themselves, as the gloom of the night deepened. I felt as if in the curious apartments of that vast edifice the fragments of a beautiful story, which I could follow for some distance, but of which I could never see the end, flew about in a sudden gust of the vernal breeze. And all the same I would wander from room to room in pursuit of them the whole night long.

I can't explain the amazing events that happened as the night grew darker. It felt like in the strange rooms of that huge building, pieces of a beautiful story floated around, something I could trace for a while but could never fully grasp. Still, I would roam from room to room chasing after them all night long.

Amid the eddy of these dream-fragments, amid the smell of henna and the twanging of the guitar, amid the waves of air charged with fragrant spray, I would catch like a flash of lightning the momentary glimpse of a fair damsel. She it was who had saffron-coloured paijamas, white ruddy soft feet in gold-embroidered slippers with curved toes, a close-fitting bodice wrought with gold, a red cap, from which a golden frill fell on her snowy brow and cheeks.

In the whirlwind of these dream fragments, surrounded by the scent of henna and the sound of the guitar, in the air filled with fragrant mist, I would catch a brief glimpse of a beautiful young woman. She wore saffron-colored pajamas, soft white feet in gold-embroidered slippers with curved toes, a snug bodice decorated with gold, and a red cap with a golden fringe that draped over her fair brow and cheeks.

She had maddened me. In pursuit of her I wandered from room to room, from path to path among the bewildering maze of alleys in the enchanted dreamland of the nether world of sleep.

She drove me crazy. Trying to find her, I roamed from room to room, from one path to another among the confusing maze of alleys in the magical dreamland of the underworld of sleep.

Sometimes in the evening, while arraying myself carefully as a prince of the blood-royal before a large mirror, with a candle burning on either side, I would see a sudden reflection of the Persian beauty by the side of my own. A swift turn of her neck, a quick eager glance of intense passion and pain glowing in her large dark eyes, just a suspicion of speech on her dainty red lips, her figure, fair and slim crowned with youth like a blossoming creeper, quickly uplifted in her graceful tilting gait, a dazzling flash of pain and craving and ecstasy, a smile and a glance and a blaze of jewels and silk, and she melted away. A wild glist of wind, laden with all the fragrance of hills and woods, would put out my light, and I would fling aside my dress and lie down on my bed, my eyes closed and my body thrilling with delight, and there around me in the breeze, amid all the perfume of the woods and hills, floated through the silent gloom many a caress and many a kiss and many a tender touch of hands, and gentle murmurs in my ears, and fragrant breaths on my brow; or a sweetly-perfumed kerchief was wafted again and again on my cheeks. Then slowly a mysterious serpent would twist her stupefying coils about me; and heaving a heavy sigh, I would lapse into insensibility, and then into a profound slumber.

Sometimes in the evening, while carefully dressing like a royal prince in front of a large mirror, with a candle burning on each side, I would suddenly catch a reflection of the Persian beauty beside me. A quick turn of her neck, an eager glance of intense passion and pain shining in her large dark eyes, just a hint of speech on her delicate red lips, her fair and slim figure crowned with youth like a blossoming vine, gracefully uplifted in her elegant stride, a dazzling flash of longing and ecstasy, a smile and a glance and a sparkle of jewels and silk, and then she would fade away. A wild gust of wind, filled with the fragrance of hills and woods, would extinguish my light, and I would toss aside my clothes and lie down on my bed, my eyes closed and my body tingling with delight, surrounded by the breeze, amidst all the perfume of the woods and hills, where many caresses, kisses, and gentle touches of hands floated through the silent darkness, along with soft murmurs in my ears and fragrant breaths on my forehead; or a sweetly-scented handkerchief would brush against my cheeks again and again. Then slowly, a mysterious serpent would wrap her enchanting coils around me; and with a heavy sigh, I would drift into unconsciousness, and then into a deep sleep.

One evening I decided to go out on my horse—I do not know who implored me to stay-but I would listen to no entreaties that day. My English hat and coat were resting on a rack, and I was about to take them down when a sudden whirlwind, crested with the sands of the Susta and the dead leaves of the Avalli hills, caught them up, and whirled them round and round, while a loud peal of merry laughter rose higher and higher, striking all the chords of mirth till it died away in the land of sunset.

One evening, I decided to ride out on my horse—I have no idea who begged me to stay, but I wasn’t going to listen to anyone that day. My English hat and coat were hanging on a rack, and I was about to grab them when a sudden gust of wind, mixed with the sands of the Susta and dry leaves from the Avalli hills, swept them up and spun them around. At the same time, a loud burst of joyful laughter filled the air, growing louder and louder until it faded away into the sunset.

I could not go out for my ride, and the next day I gave up my queer English coat and hat for good.

I couldn't go out for my ride, and the next day I gave up my odd English coat and hat for good.

That day again at dead of night I heard the stifled heart-breaking sobs of some one—as if below the bed, below the floor, below the stony foundation of that gigantic palace, from the depths of a dark damp grave, a voice piteously cried and implored me: "Oh, rescue me! Break through these doors of hard illusion, deathlike slumber and fruitless dreams, place by your side on the saddle, press me to your heart, and, riding through hills and woods and across the river, take me to the warm radiance of your sunny rooms above!"

That night again, I heard the muffled, heart-wrenching sobs of someone—like a voice coming from beneath the bed, below the floor, from the stone foundation of that massive palace, deep within a dark, damp grave. A voice cried out in desperation, "Oh, please save me! Break through these hard doors of illusion, this deathlike sleep and useless dreams, put me by your side on the saddle, hold me close to your heart, and as we ride through the hills and woods and across the river, take me to the warm light of your sunny rooms above!"

Who am I? Oh, how can I rescue thee? What drowning beauty, what incarnate passion shall I drag to the shore from this wild eddy of dreams? O lovely ethereal apparition! Where didst thou flourish and when? By what cool spring, under the shade of what date-groves, wast thou born—in the lap of what homeless wanderer in the desert? What Bedouin snatched thee from thy mother's arms, an opening bud plucked from a wild creeper, placed thee on a horse swift as lightning, crossed the burning sands, and took thee to the slave-market of what royal city? And there, what officer of the Badshah, seeing the glory of thy bashful blossoming youth, paid for thee in gold, placed thee in a golden palanquin, and offered thee as a present for the seraglio of his master? And O, the history of that place! The music of the sareng, the jingle of anklets, the occasional flash of daggers and the glowing wine of Shiraz poison, and the piercing flashing glance! What infinite grandeur, what endless servitude!

Who am I? How can I save you? What beautiful soul, what fiery passion will I pull from this chaotic swirl of dreams? Oh, stunning ghost! Where did you thrive and when? By what cool spring, under the shade of which palm trees, were you born—in the arms of what wandering soul in the desert? Which Bedouin took you from your mother, like a delicate bud plucked from a wild vine, put you on a horse as fast as lightning, crossed the scorching sands, and brought you to the slave market of what royal city? And there, which official of the king, seeing the beauty of your shy, blossoming youth, paid for you in gold, placed you in a golden palanquin, and offered you as a gift for the harem of his master? Oh, the stories of that place! The music of the stringed instrument, the jingle of anklets, the occasional flash of daggers, the intoxicating wine of Shiraz, and the piercing, flashing gaze! What endless greatness, what never-ending servitude!

The slave-girls to thy right and left waved the chamar as diamonds flashed from their bracelets; the Badshah, the king of kings, fell on his knees at thy snowy feet in bejewelled shoes, and outside the terrible Abyssinian eunuch, looking like a messenger of death, but clothed like an angel, stood with a naked sword in his hand! Then, O, thou flower of the desert, swept away by the blood-stained dazzling ocean of grandeur, with its foam of jealousy, its rocks and shoals of intrigue, on what shore of cruel death wast thou cast, or in what other land more splendid and more cruel?

The slave girls on your right and left waved fans as diamonds sparkled from their bracelets; the king of kings knelt at your pristine feet in jeweled shoes, and outside, the fearsome Abyssinian eunuch, looking like a harbinger of death yet dressed like an angel, stood with a drawn sword in hand! Then, oh, you flower of the desert, swept away by the blood-stained, dazzling ocean of grandeur, with its foamy jealousy, its rocks and shoals of intrigue, on what shore of cruel death were you cast, or in what other land more magnificent and more ruthless?

Suddenly at this moment that crazy Meher Ali screamed out: "Stand back! Stand back!! All is false! All is false!!" I opened my eyes and saw that it was already light. My chaprasi came and handed me my letters, and the cook waited with a salam for my orders.

Suddenly, at that moment, that crazy Meher Ali shouted, "Step back! Step back!! Everything is a lie! Everything is a lie!!" I opened my eyes and saw that it was already light outside. My assistant came and handed me my letters, and the cook waited with a greeting for my orders.

I said; "No, I can stay here no longer." That very day I packed up, and moved to my office. Old Karim Khan smiled a little as he saw me. I felt nettled, but said nothing, and fell to my work.

I said, "No, I can't stay here any longer." That same day, I packed my things and moved to my office. Old Karim Khan smiled a bit when he saw me. I felt annoyed, but I said nothing and got to work.

As evening approached I grew absent-minded; I felt as if I had an appointment to keep; and the work of examining the cotton accounts seemed wholly useless; even the Nizamat of the Nizam did not appear to be of much worth. Whatever belonged to the present, whatever was moving and acting and working for bread seemed trivial, meaningless, and contemptible.

As evening came, I started to lose focus; it felt like I had an appointment I needed to keep, and going through the cotton accounts felt completely pointless; even the Nizamat of the Nizam didn't seem to matter much. Everything related to the now, everything that was active and working for a living felt trivial, meaningless, and worthless.

I threw my pen down, closed my ledgers, got into my dog-cart, and drove away. I noticed that it stopped of itself at the gate of the marble palace just at the hour of twilight. With quick steps I climbed the stairs, and entered the room.

I tossed my pen aside, shut my ledgers, hopped into my dog-cart, and drove off. I saw that it stopped on its own at the gate of the marble palace right at twilight. I quickly climbed the stairs and walked into the room.

A heavy silence was reigning within. The dark rooms were looking sullen as if they had taken offence. My heart was full of contrition, but there was no one to whom I could lay it bare, or of whom I could ask forgiveness. I wandered about the dark rooms with a vacant mind. I wished I had a guitar to which I could sing to the unknown: "O fire, the poor moth that made a vain effort to fly away has come back to thee! Forgive it but this once, burn its wings and consume it in thy flame!"

A heavy silence filled the space. The dark rooms looked gloomy, as if they were offended. My heart was full of regret, but there was no one to confide in or ask for forgiveness. I wandered through the dim rooms with a blank mind. I wished I had a guitar to sing to the unknown: "O fire, the poor moth that tried to escape has returned to you! Forgive it just this once, burn its wings and consume it in your flames!"

Suddenly two tear-drops fell from overhead on my brow. Dark masses of clouds overcast the top of the Avalli hills that day. The gloomy woods and the sooty waters of the Susta were waiting in terrible suspense and in an ominous calm. Suddenly land, water, and sky shivered, and a wild tempest-blast rushed howling through the distant pathless woods, showing its lightning-teeth like a raving maniac who had broken his chains. The desolate halls of the palace banged their doors, and moaned in the bitterness of anguish.

Suddenly, two drops of rain fell on my forehead. Dark clouds covered the top of the Avalli hills that day. The gloomy woods and the dirty waters of the Susta were in a state of terrible suspense and ominous calm. Then, land, water, and sky shook, and a wild windstorm rushed through the distant, untamed woods, baring its lightning-like teeth like a raging maniac who had broken free. The empty halls of the palace banged their doors and moaned in deep anguish.

The servants were all in the office, and there was no one to light the lamps. The night was cloudy and moonless. In the dense gloom within I could distinctly feel that a woman was lying on her face on the carpet below the bed—clasping and tearing her long dishevelled hair with desperate fingers. Blood was tricking down her fair brow, and she was now laughing a hard, harsh, mirthless laugh, now bursting into violent wringing sobs, now rending her bodice and striking at her bare bosom, as the wind roared in through the open window, and the rain poured in torrents and soaked her through and through.

The servants were all in the office, and there was no one to light the lamps. The night was cloudy and dark. In the thick gloom, I could clearly sense that a woman was lying face down on the carpet beneath the bed—gripping and pulling at her long messy hair with frantic hands. Blood was trickling down her pale forehead, and she was alternating between a harsh, joyless laugh and intense, wracking sobs, tearing at her clothing and striking her bare chest as the wind howled through the open window, and the rain poured in in torrents, soaking her completely.

All night there was no cessation of the storm or of the passionate cry. I wandered from room to room in the dark, with unavailing sorrow. Whom could I console when no one was by? Whose was this intense agony of sorrow? Whence arose this inconsolable grief?

All night, the storm and the desperate cries didn’t stop. I moved from room to room in the dark, filled with useless sorrow. Who could I comfort when no one was there? Whose deep pain was this? Where did this unbearable grief come from?

And the mad man cried out: "Stand back! Stand back!! All is false! All is false!!"

And the crazy guy shouted, "Step back! Step back!! Everything is a lie! Everything is a lie!!"

I saw that the day had dawned, and Meher Ali was going round and round the palace with his usual cry in that dreadful weather. Suddenly it came to me that perhaps he also had once lived in that house, and that, though he had gone mad, he came there every day, and went round and round, fascinated by the weird spell cast by the marble demon.

I noticed that the day had begun, and Meher Ali was circling the palace with his usual cries in that awful weather. Suddenly, it struck me that he might have once lived in that house, and that even though he had lost his mind, he returned there every day, going around and around, enchanted by the strange charm of the marble demon.

Despite the storm and rain I ran to him and asked: "Ho, Meher Ali, what is false?"

Despite the storm and rain, I ran to him and asked, "Hey, Meher Ali, what’s false?"

The man answered nothing, but pushing me aside went round and round with his frantic cry, like a bird flying fascinated about the jaws of a snake, and made a desperate effort to warn himself by repeating: "Stand back! Stand back!! All is false! All is false!!"

The man said nothing but pushed me aside, running in circles with his frantic cry, like a bird captivated by the jaws of a snake, and made a desperate attempt to warn himself by repeating, "Stay back! Stay back!! It's all a lie! It's all a lie!!"

I ran like a mad man through the pelting rain to my office, and asked Karim Khan: "Tell me the meaning of all this!"

I sprinted like a crazy person through the pouring rain to my office and asked Karim Khan, "What's the meaning of all this?"

What I gathered from that old man was this: That at one time countless unrequited passions and unsatisfied longings and lurid flames of wild blazing pleasure raged within that palace, and that the curse of all the heart-aches and blasted hopes had made its every stone thirsty and hungry, eager to swallow up like a famished ogress any living man who might chance to approach. Not one of those who lived there for three consecutive nights could escape these cruel jaws, save Meher Ali, who had escaped at the cost of his reason.

What I got from that old man was this: At one time, countless unfulfilled desires, unsatisfied longings, and intense bursts of wild pleasure burned within that palace. The curse of heartache and shattered dreams had made every stone thirsty and hungry, eager to consume any living person who happened to come near, like a starving witch. None of those who stayed there for three nights in a row could escape those cruel jaws, except for Meher Ali, who fled at the expense of his sanity.

I asked: "Is there no means whatever of my release?" The old man said: "There is only one means, and that is very difficult. I will tell you what it is, but first you must hear the history of a young Persian girl who once lived in that pleasure-dome. A stranger or a more bitterly heart-rending tragedy was never enacted on this earth."

I asked, "Is there no way for me to be released?" The old man replied, "There is just one way, but it’s very challenging. I will explain it to you, but first, you need to hear the story of a young Persian girl who once lived in that pleasure-dome. You’ve never seen a stranger or a more heartbreaking tragedy unfold on this earth."

Just at this moment the coolies announced that the train was coming. So soon? We hurriedly packed up our luggage, as the tram steamed in. An English gentleman, apparently just aroused from slumber, was looking out of a first-class carriage endeavouring to read the name of the station. As soon as he caught sight of our fellow-passenger, he cried, "Hallo," and took him into his own compartment. As we got into a second-class carriage, we had no chance of finding out who the man was nor what was the end of his story.

Just then, the porters announced that the train was arriving. So soon? We quickly packed our bags as the tram pulled in. An English gentleman, seemingly just woken up, was peering out of a first-class carriage trying to read the name of the station. As soon as he spotted our fellow passenger, he exclaimed, "Hello," and pulled him into his compartment. When we boarded a second-class carriage, we missed the chance to find out who the man was or how his story ended.

I said; "The man evidently took us for fools and imposed upon us out of fun. The story is pure fabrication from start to finish." The discussion that followed ended in a lifelong rupture between my theosophist kinsman and myself.

I said, "The man clearly thought we were idiots and messed with us for laughs. The whole story is complete nonsense from beginning to end." The conversation that followed led to a permanent rift between my theosophist relative and me.





THE VICTORY

She was the Princess Ajita. And the court poet of King Narayan had never seen her. On the day he recited a new poem to the king he would raise his voice just to that pitch which could be heard by unseen hearers in the screened balcony high above the hall. He sent up his song towards the star-land out of his reach, where, circled with light, the planet who ruled his destiny shone unknown and out of ken.

She was Princess Ajita. And the court poet of King Narayan had never seen her. On the day he read a new poem to the king, he would raise his voice to just the right pitch so it could be heard by unseen listeners in the screened balcony high above the hall. He sent his song up toward the starry sky, where the planet that controlled his fate shone brightly, unknown and out of reach.

He would espy some shadow moving behind the veil. A tinkling sound would come to his car from afar, and would set him dreaming of the ankles whose tiny golden bells sang at each step. Ah, the rosy red tender feet that walked the dust of the earth like God's mercy on the fallen! The poet had placed them on the altar of his heart, where he wove his songs to the tune of those golden bells. Doubt never arose in his mind as to whose shadow it was that moved behind the screen, and whose anklets they were that sang to the time of his beating heart.

He would catch sight of a shadow moving behind the veil. A tinkling sound would drift to his car from a distance, making him dream of the ankles adorned with tiny golden bells that chimed with every step. Ah, the rosy red, delicate feet that walked the earth like God's mercy to the fallen! The poet had placed them on the altar of his heart, where he crafted his songs to the rhythm of those golden bells. He never doubted whose shadow was moving behind the screen, and whose anklets were ringing in time with his beating heart.

Manjari, the maid of the princess, passed by the poet's house on her way to the river, and she never missed a day to have a few words with him on the sly. When she found the road deserted, and the shadow of dusk on the land, she would boldly enter his room, and sit at the corner of his carpet. There was a suspicion of an added care in the choice of the colour of her veil, in the setting of the flower in her hair.

Manjari, the princess's maid, walked past the poet's house on her way to the river, and she never missed a chance to exchange a few words with him secretly. When the road was empty and dusk settled over the land, she would confidently enter his room and sit in the corner of his carpet. There seemed to be a hint of extra thought in the color of her veil and the way she arranged the flower in her hair.

People smiled and whispered at this, and they were not to blame. For Shekhar the poet never took the trouble to hide the fact that these meetings were a pure joy to him.

People smiled and whispered about this, and they couldn't be blamed. Because Shekhar the poet never bothered to hide the fact that these meetings brought him pure joy.

The meaning of her name was the spray of flowers. One must confess that for an ordinary mortal it was sufficient in its sweetness. But Shekhar made his own addition to this name, and called her the Spray of Spring Flowers. And ordinary mortals shook their heads and said, Ah, me!

The meaning of her name was the spray of flowers. One must admit that for an average person, it was sweet enough on its own. But Shekhar added his own twist to this name and called her the Spray of Spring Flowers. And ordinary people shook their heads and said, Ah, me!

In the spring songs that the poet sang the praise of the spray of spring flowers was conspicuously reiterated; and the king winked and smiled at him when he heard it, and the poet smiled in answer.

In the spring songs that the poet sang, the beauty of the spring flowers was clearly repeated; and the king winked and smiled at him when he heard it, and the poet smiled back in response.

The king would put him the question; "Is it the business of the bee merely to hum in the court of the spring?"

The king would ask him, "Is it the job of the bee just to buzz in the spring's court?"

The poet would answer; "No, but also to sip the honey of the spray of spring flowers."

The poet would respond, "No, but also to enjoy the sweetness of the spring flowers' dew."

And they all laughed in the king's hall. And it was rumoured that the Princess Akita also laughed at her maid's accepting the poet's name for her, and Manjari felt glad in her heart.

And everyone laughed in the king's hall. It was said that Princess Akita also laughed at her maid using the poet's name for her, and Manjari felt happy in her heart.

Thus truth and falsehood mingle in life—and to what God builds man adds his own decoration.

So truth and lies mix in life—and what God creates, people add their own embellishments to.

Only those were pure truths which were sung by the poet. The theme was Krishna, the lover god, and Radha, the beloved, the Eternal Man and the Eternal Woman, the sorrow that comes from the beginning of time, and the joy without end. The truth of these songs was tested in his inmost heart by everybody from the beggar to the king himself. The poet's songs were on the lips of all. At the merest glimmer of the moon and the faintest whisper of the summer breeze his songs would break forth in the land from windows and courtyards, from sailing-boats, from shadows of the wayside trees, in numberless voices.

Only the truths sung by the poet were pure. The theme was Krishna, the god of love, and Radha, the beloved—representing the Eternal Man and the Eternal Woman, the sorrow that has existed since the dawn of time, and the joy that never ends. The truth of these songs was felt deep in the hearts of everyone, from the beggar to the king. The poet's songs were on everyone's lips. At the slightest hint of the moon and the softest whisper of the summer breeze, his songs would echo throughout the land, coming from windows and courtyards, from sailboats, and from the shadows of the trees lining the roads, in countless voices.

Thus passed the days happily. The poet recited, the king listened, the hearers applauded, Manjari passed and repassed by the poet's room on her way to the river—the shadow flitted behind the screened balcony, and the tiny golden bells tinkled from afar.

Thus the days went by happily. The poet recited, the king listened, the audience applauded, Manjari walked back and forth past the poet's room on her way to the river—the shadow moved behind the screened balcony, and the tiny golden bells tinkled in the distance.

Just then set forth from his home in the south a poet on his path of conquest. He came to King Narayan, in the kingdom of Amarapur. He stood before the throne, and uttered a verse in praise of the king. He had challenged all the court poets on his way, and his career of victory had been unbroken.

Just then, a poet set out from his home in the south on his quest for glory. He arrived at the court of King Narayan, in the kingdom of Amarapur. He stood before the throne and recited a verse in praise of the king. He had challenged all the court poets along the way, and his winning streak had been unstoppable.

The king received him with honour, and said: "Poet, I offer you welcome."

The king welcomed him with respect and said, "Poet, I welcome you."

Pundarik, the poet, proudly replied: "Sire, I ask for war."

Pundarik, the poet, confidently responded, "Sir, I ask for war."

Shekhar, the court poet of the king did not know how the battle of the muse was to be waged. He had no sleep at night. The mighty figure of the famous Pundarik, his sharp nose curved like a scimitar, and his proud head tilted on one side, haunted the poet's vision in the dark.

Shekhar, the king's court poet, didn’t know how to approach the battle of inspiration. He couldn’t sleep at night. The powerful image of the renowned Pundarik, with his sharp nose curving like a scimitar and his proud head tilted to one side, haunted the poet's mind in the darkness.

With a trembling heart Shekhar entered the arena in the morning. The theatre was filled with the crowd.

With a racing heart, Shekhar stepped into the arena in the morning. The theater was packed with people.

The poet greeted his rival with a smile and a bow. Pundarik returned it with a slight toss of his head, and turned his face towards his circle of adoring followers with a meaning smile. Shekhar cast his glance towards the screened balcony high above, and saluted his lady in his mind, saying! "If I am the winner at the combat to-day, my lady, thy victorious name shall be glorified."

The poet smiled and bowed to his rival. Pundarik nodded slightly in response and turned to his group of admiring followers with a meaningful smile. Shekhar glanced up at the screened balcony and mentally greeted his lady, saying, "If I win the fight today, my lady, your victorious name will be celebrated."

The trumpet sounded. The great crowd stood up, shouting victory to the king. The king, dressed in an ample robe of white, slowly came into the hall like a floating cloud of autumn, and sat on his throne.

The trumpet sounded. The large crowd stood up, cheering for the king. The king, wearing an oversized white robe, slowly entered the hall like a drifting autumn cloud and took his seat on the throne.

Pundarik stood up, and the vast hall became still. With his head raised high and chest expanded, he began in his thundering voice to recite the praise of King Narayan. His words burst upon the walls of the hall like breakers of the sea, and seemed to rattle against the ribs of the listening crowd. The skill with which he gave varied meanings to the name Narayan, and wove each letter of it through the web of his verses in all mariner of combinations, took away the breath of his amazed hearers.

Pundarik stood up, and the huge hall fell silent. With his head held high and chest out, he began to thunderingly praise King Narayan. His words crashed against the walls of the hall like ocean waves, reverberating through the attentive crowd. The way he skillfully assigned different meanings to the name Narayan and intricately wove each letter into his verses in every possible combination left his audience breathless.

For some minutes after he took his seat his voice continued to vibrate among the numberless pillars of the king's court and in thousands of speechless hearts. The learned professors who had come from distant lands raised their right hands, and cried, Bravo!

For several minutes after he sat down, his voice kept resonating among the countless pillars of the king's court and in thousands of silent hearts. The knowledgeable professors who had traveled from faraway lands raised their right hands and shouted, "Bravo!"

The king threw a glance on Shekhar's face, and Shekhar in answer raised for a moment his eyes full of pain towards his master, and then stood up like a stricken deer at bay. His face was pale, his bashfulness was almost that of a woman, his slight youthful figure, delicate in its outline, seemed like a tensely strung vina ready to break out in music at the least touch.

The king glanced at Shekhar's face, and Shekhar, in response, momentarily raised his eyes filled with pain towards his master, then stood up like a wounded deer cornered. His face was pale, his shyness was almost that of a woman, and his slight youthful figure, delicate in its outline, resembled a tightly strung instrument ready to burst into music at the slightest touch.

His head was bent, his voice was low, when he began. The first few verses were almost inaudible. Then he slowly raised his head, and his clear sweet voice rose into the sky like a quivering flame of fire. He began with the ancient legend of the kingly line lost in the haze of the past, and brought it down through its long course of heroism and matchless generosity to the present age. He fixed his gaze on the king's face, and all the vast and unexpressed love of the people for the royal house rose like incense in his song, and enwreathed the throne on all sides. These were his last words when, trembling, he took his seat: "My master, I may be beaten in play of words, but not in my love for thee."

His head was down, and his voice was quiet when he started. The first few lines were barely audible. Then he slowly raised his head, and his clear, sweet voice soared into the sky like a flickering flame. He began with the ancient tale of the royal lineage lost in the mists of the past and brought it down through its long journey of bravery and unmatched generosity to the present day. He fixed his gaze on the king's face, and all the deep, unspoken love of the people for the royal family rose like incense in his song, surrounding the throne on all sides. These were his last words as he trembled and took his seat: "My master, I may be outmatched in wordplay, but not in my love for you."

Tears filled the eyes of the hearers, and the stone walls shook with cries of victory.

Tears welled up in the eyes of the listeners, and the stone walls trembled with shouts of triumph.

Mocking this popular outburst of feeling, with an august shake of his head and a contemptuous sneer, Pundarik stood up, and flung this question to the assembly; "What is there superior to words?" In a moment the hall lapsed into silence again.

Mocking this popular surge of emotion, with a dignified shake of his head and a scornful sneer, Pundarik stood up and threw this question at the crowd: "What is better than words?" In an instant, the hall fell silent once more.

Then with a marvellous display of learning, he proved that the Word was in the beginning, that the Word was God. He piled up quotations from scriptures, and built a high altar for the Word to be seated above all that there is in heaven and in earth. He repeated that question in his mighty voice: "What is there superior to words?"

Then, with an impressive show of knowledge, he demonstrated that the Word was in the beginning, that the Word was God. He gathered quotes from scriptures and built a tall altar for the Word to be placed above everything in heaven and on earth. He asked that question again in his powerful voice: "What is greater than words?"

Proudly he looked around him. None dared to accept his challenge, and he slowly took his seat like a lion who had just made a full meal of its victim. The pandits shouted, Bravo! The king remained silent with wonder, and the poet Shekhar felt himself of no account by the side of this stupendous learning. The assembly broke up for that day.

Proudly, he looked around him. No one dared to accept his challenge, and he slowly took his seat like a lion that had just finished a full meal of its prey. The pandits shouted, "Bravo!" The king remained silent in awe, and the poet Shekhar felt insignificant next to this incredible knowledge. The assembly ended for the day.

Next day Shekhar began his song. It was of that day when the pipings of love's flute startled for the first time the hushed air of the Vrinda forest. The shepherd women did not know who was the player or whence came the music. Sometimes it seemed to come from the heart of the south wind, and sometimes from the straying clouds of the hilltops. It came with a message of tryst from the land of the sunrise, and it floated from the verge of sunset with its sigh of sorrow. The stars seemed to be the stops of the instrument that flooded the dreams of the night with melody. The music seemed to burst all at once from all sides, from fields and groves, from the shady lanes and lonely roads, from the melting blue of the sky, from the shimmering green of the grass. They neither knew its meaning nor could they find words to give utterance to the desire of their hearts. Tears filled their eyes, and their life seemed to long for a death that would be its consummation.

The next day, Shekhar began his song. It was about the day when the sounds of love's flute first broke the quiet air of the Vrinda forest. The shepherd women had no idea who was playing or where the music came from. Sometimes it seemed to come from the heart of the southern wind, and other times from the wandering clouds on the mountaintops. It arrived with a message of a meeting from the land of the sunrise, and it floated in from the edge of sunset with its sigh of sadness. The stars felt like the keys of the instrument that filled the night’s dreams with melody. The music seemed to suddenly erupt from all around—fields and groves, shady paths and lonely roads, the deep blue of the sky, and the shimmering green of the grass. They didn’t understand its meaning and couldn’t find the words to express the longing in their hearts. Tears filled their eyes, and their lives seemed to long for a death that would bring fulfillment.

Shekhar forgot his audience, forgot the trial of his strength with a rival. He stood alone amid his thoughts that rustled and quivered round him like leaves in a summer breeze, and sang the Song of the Flute. He had in his mind the vision of an image that had taken its shape from a shadow, and the echo of a faint tinkling sound of a distant footstep.

Shekhar lost track of his audience and the challenge with his rival. He stood alone, immersed in his thoughts that fluttered around him like leaves in a summer breeze, and sang the Song of the Flute. In his mind, he pictured an image formed from a shadow and heard the faint tinkling sound of a distant footstep.

He took his seat. His hearers trembled with the sadness of an indefinable delight, immense and vague, and they forgot to applaud him. As this feeling died away Pundarik stood up before the throne and challenged his rival to define who was this Lover and who was the Beloved. He arrogantly looked around him, he smiled at his followers and then put the question again: "Who is Krishna, the lover, and who is Radha, the beloved?"

He took his seat. His audience was overwhelmed by a deep, unclear sense of joy, so strong that they forgot to applaud him. As this feeling faded, Pundarik stood up before the throne and challenged his opponent to explain who the Lover was and who the Beloved was. He arrogantly scanned the room, smiled at his supporters, and then asked the question again: "Who is Krishna, the lover, and who is Radha, the beloved?"

Then he began to analyse the roots of those names,—and various interpretations of their meanings. He brought before the bewildered audience all the intricacies of the different schools of metaphysics with consummate skill. Each letter of those names he divided from its fellow, and then pursued them with a relentless logic till they fell to the dust in confusion, to be caught up again and restored to a meaning never before imagined by the subtlest of word-mongers.

Then he started to analyze the origins of those names—and the different interpretations of their meanings. He presented to the puzzled audience all the complexities of the various schools of metaphysics with exceptional skill. He separated each letter of those names from the others and then pursued them with relentless logic until they crumbled into confusion, only to be gathered up again and transformed into a meaning never before conceived by even the cleverest of wordsmiths.

The pandits were in ecstasy; they applauded vociferously; and the crowd followed them, deluded into the certainty that they had witnessed, that day, the last shred of the curtains of Truth torn to pieces before their eyes by a prodigy of intellect. The performance of his tremendous feat so delighted them that they forgot to ask themselves if there was any truth behind it after all.

The scholars were ecstatic; they applauded loudly; and the crowd followed them, convinced they had just seen the final pieces of the curtains of Truth ripped apart right before their eyes by a genius. The amazing display thrilled them so much that they forgot to question whether there was any real truth behind it at all.

The king's mind was overwhelmed with wonder. The atmosphere was completely cleared of all illusion of music, and the vision of the world around seemed to be changed from its freshness of tender green to the solidity of a high road levelled and made hard with crushed stones.

The king was filled with amazement. The air was completely free of any illusion of music, and the view of the world around him appeared to shift from the softness of fresh greenery to the firmness of a road flattened and packed down with crushed stones.

To the people assembled their own poet appeared a mere boy in comparison with this giant, who walked with such case, knocking down difficulties at each step in the world of words and thoughts. It became evident to them for the first time that the poems Shekhar wrote were absurdly simple, and it must be a mere accident that they did not write them themselves. They were neither new, nor difficult, nor instructive, nor necessary.

To the people gathered, their own poet seemed like just a kid next to this giant, who moved effortlessly, overcoming challenges in the realm of words and ideas with each step. It became clear to them for the first time that the poems Shekhar wrote were ridiculously simple, and it was probably just a fluke that they hadn’t written them themselves. They were neither original, nor complex, nor enlightening, nor essential.

The king tried to goad his poet with keen glances, silently inciting him to make a final effort. But Shekhar took no notice, and remained fixed to his seat.

The king tried to prod his poet with sharp looks, silently urging him to make one last push. But Shekhar ignored him and stayed firmly in his seat.

The king in anger came down from his throne—took off his pearl chain and put it on Pundarik's head. Everybody in the hall cheered. From the upper balcony came a slight sound of the movements of rustling robes and waist-chains hung with golden bells. Shekhar rose from his seat and left the hall.

The king, infuriated, descended from his throne, removed his pearl necklace, and placed it on Pundarik's head. Everyone in the hall cheered. From the upper balcony, there was a faint sound of rustling robes and waist chains adorned with golden bells. Shekhar got up from his seat and exited the hall.

It was a dark night of waning moon. The poet Shekhar took down his MSS. from his shelves and heaped them on the floor. Some of them contained his earliest writings, which he had almost forgotten. He turned over the pages, reading passages here and there. They all seemed to him poor and trivial—mere words and childish rhymes!

It was a dark night with a fading moon. The poet Shekhar took his manuscripts down from the shelves and stacked them on the floor. Some of them had his earliest writings, which he had nearly forgotten. He flipped through the pages, reading snippets here and there. They all seemed poor and insignificant to him—just words and childish rhymes!

One by one he tore his books to fragments, and threw them into a vessel containing fire, and said: "To thee, to thee, O my beauty, my fire! Thou hast been burning in my heart all these futile years. If my life were a piece of gold it would come out of its trial brighter, but it is a trodden turf of grass, and nothing remains of it but this handful of ashes."

One by one, he ripped his books apart and tossed them into a fire, saying: "To you, to you, oh my beauty, my fire! You’ve been burning in my heart all these pointless years. If my life were a piece of gold, it would come out of the fire shining brighter, but it's just a patch of grass that's been trampled, and all that's left of it is this handful of ashes."

The night wore on. Shekhar opened wide his windows. He spread upon his bed the white flowers that he loved, the jasmines, tuberoses and chrysanthemums, and brought into his bedroom all the lamps he had in his house and lighted them. Then mixing with honey the juice of some poisonous root he drank it and lay down on his bed.

The night continued. Shekhar threw open his windows. He scattered the white flowers he loved—jasmines, tuberoses, and chrysanthemums—on his bed, and brought all the lamps from around the house into his room and lit them up. Then, mixing honey with the juice of a poisonous root, he drank it and lay down on his bed.

Golden anklets tinkled in the passage outside the door, and a subtle perfume came into the room with the breeze.

Golden anklets jingled in the hallway outside the door, and a faint perfume wafted into the room with the breeze.

The poet, with his eyes shut, said; "My lady, have you taken pity upon your servant at last and come to see him?"

The poet, with his eyes closed, said, "My lady, have you finally shown mercy to your servant and come to see him?"

The answer came in a sweet voice "My poet, I have come."

The reply came in a gentle voice, "My poet, I'm here."

Shekhar opened his eyes—and saw before his bed the figure of a woman.

Shekhar opened his eyes and saw a woman standing in front of his bed.

His sight was dim and blurred. And it seemed to him that the image made of a shadow that he had ever kept throned in the secret shrine of his heart had come into the outer world in his last moment to gaze upon his face.

His vision was hazy and unclear. It felt to him like the shadowy image he had always held in the hidden place of his heart had come into the real world in his final moments to look upon his face.

The woman said; "I am the Princess Ajita."

The woman said, "I’m Princess Ajita."

The poet with a great effort sat up on his bed.

The poet made a great effort to sit up in bed.

The princess whispered into his car: "The king has not done you justice. It was you who won at the combat, my poet, and I have come to crown you with the crown of victory."

The princess leaned into his car and said, "The king hasn't treated you fairly. It was you who triumphed in the battle, my poet, and I've come to crown you with the victory crown."

She took the garland of flowers from her own neck, and put it on his hair, and the poet fell down upon his bed stricken by death.

She removed the flower garland from her neck and placed it in his hair, and the poet collapsed onto his bed, struck by death.





ONCE THERE WAS A KING

"Once upon a time there was a king."

When we were children there was no need to know who the king in the fairy story was. It didn't matter whether he was called Shiladitya or Shaliban, whether he lived at Kashi or Kanauj. The thing that made a seven-year-old boy's heart go thump, thump with delight was this one sovereign truth; this reality of all realities: "Once there was a king."

When we were kids, it didn’t matter who the king in the fairy tale was. It didn't matter if he was named Shiladitya or Shaliban, or if he lived in Kashi or Kanauj. What made a seven-year-old boy's heart race with excitement was this one undeniable fact; this ultimate truth: "Once there was a king."

But the readers of this modern age are far more exact and exacting. When they hear such an opening to a story, they are at once critical and suspicious. They apply the searchlight of science to its legendary haze and ask: "Which king?"

But the readers of today are much more precise and demanding. When they hear an opening like that in a story, they immediately become critical and skeptical. They shine the searchlight of science on its legendary mist and ask, "Which king?"

The story-tellers have become more precise in their turn. They are no longer content with the old indefinite, "There was a king," but assume instead a look of profound learning, and begin: "Once there was a king named Ajatasatru,"

The storytellers have become more specific in their approach. They are no longer satisfied with the vague, "There was a king," but instead adopt a look of deep knowledge and start with: "Once there was a king named Ajatasatru,"

The modern reader's curiosity, however, is not so easily satisfied. He blinks at the author through his scientific spectacles, and asks again: "Which Ajatasatru?"

The modern reader's curiosity, however, is not so easily satisfied. They blink at the author through their scientific glasses and ask again: "Which Ajatasatru?"

"Every schoolboy knows," the author proceeds, "that there were three Ajatasatrus. The first was born in the twentieth century B.C., and died at the tender age of two years and eight months, I deeply regret that it is impossible to find, from any trustworthy source, a detailed account of his reign. The second Ajatasatru is better known to historians. If you refer to the new Encyclopedia of History...."

"Every schoolboy knows," the author continues, "that there were three Ajatasatrus. The first was born in the 20th century B.C. and died at the young age of two years and eight months. I truly regret that it's impossible to find a detailed account of his reign from any reliable source. The second Ajatasatru is more familiar to historians. If you look up the new Encyclopedia of History...."

By this time the modern reader's suspicions are dissolved. He feels he may safely trust his author. He says to himself: "Now we shall have a story that is both improving and instructive."

By now, the modern reader's doubts are gone. They feel they can trust the author. They think to themselves, "Now we're going to get a story that is both enlightening and educational."

Ah! how we all love to be deluded! We have a secret dread of being thought ignorant. And we end by being ignorant after all, only we have done it in a long and roundabout way.

Ah! how we all love to be fooled! We secretly fear being seen as clueless. In the end, we end up being clueless anyway, but we've taken a long and roundabout path to get there.

There is an English proverb; "Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no lies." The boy of seven who is listening to a fairy story understands that perfectly well; he withholds his questions, while the story is being told. So the pure and beautiful falsehood of it all remains naked and innocent as a babe; transparent as truth itself; limpid as afresh bubbling spring. But the ponderous and learned lie of our moderns has to keep its true character draped and veiled. And if there is discovered anywhere the least little peep-hole of deception, the reader turns away with a prudish disgust, and the author is discredited.

There’s an English saying: "Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no lies." The seven-year-old boy listening to a fairy tale gets that perfectly; he holds back his questions while the story unfolds. So the pure and beautiful fantasy of it all remains bare and innocent like a baby; clear as the truth itself; fresh like a bubbling spring. But the heavy and complicated lies of our modern world need to keep their true nature hidden and covered up. And if there’s even the slightest glimpse of deceit, the reader looks away in disgust, and the author loses credibility.

When we were young, we understood all sweet things; and we could detect the sweets of a fairy story by an unerring science of our own. We never cared for such useless things as knowledge. We only cared for truth. And our unsophisticated little hearts knew well where the Crystal Palace of Truth lay and how to reach it. But to-day we are expected to write pages of facts, while the truth is simply this:

When we were kids, we got all the sweet stuff, and we could spot the delights of a fairy tale with our own unique intuition. We didn’t bother with pointless things like knowledge. We only cared about the truth. Our innocent little hearts knew exactly where the Crystal Palace of Truth was and how to get there. But now, we’re expected to write pages of facts, while the truth is simply this:

"There was a king."

"There was a king."

I remember vividly that evening in Calcutta when the fairy story began. The rain and the storm had been incessant. The whole of the city was flooded. The water was knee-deep in our lane. I had a straining hope, which was almost a certainty, that my tutor would be prevented from coming that evening. I sat on the stool in the far corner of the veranda looking down the lane, with a heart beating faster and faster. Every minute I kept my eye on the rain, and when it began to grow less I prayed with all my might; "Please, God, send some more rain till half-past seven is over." For I was quite ready to believe that there was no other need for rain except to protect one helpless boy one evening in one corner of Calcutta from the deadly clutches of his tutor.

I clearly remember that evening in Calcutta when the fairy tale started. The rain and storm had been constant. The entire city was flooded. The water was knee-deep in our street. I had a hopeful feeling, which was almost certain, that my tutor wouldn't be able to come that evening. I sat on the stool in the far corner of the veranda, looking down the street, with my heart racing faster and faster. I watched the rain every minute, and when it started to lessen, I prayed with all my heart, "Please, God, send more rain until half-past seven is over." I was completely convinced that the only reason for the rain was to protect one helpless boy for one evening in one corner of Calcutta from the deadly grip of his tutor.

If not in answer to my prayer, at any rate according to some grosser law of physical nature, the rain did not give up.

If not in response to my prayer, at least according to some more basic law of nature, the rain kept coming.

But, alas! nor did my teacher.

But, unfortunately, neither did my teacher.

Exactly to the minute, in the bend of the lane, I saw his approaching umbrella. The great bubble of hope burst in my breast, and my heart collapsed. Truly, if there is a punishment to fit the crime after death, then my tutor will be born again as me, and I shall be born as my tutor.

Exactly at the minute, in the curve of the road, I saw his umbrella coming closer. The huge bubble of hope popped in my chest, and my heart sank. Honestly, if there's a fitting punishment for sins after death, then my tutor will be reborn as me, and I will be reborn as my tutor.

As soon as I saw his umbrella I ran as hard as I could to my mother's room. My mother and my grandmother were sitting opposite one another playing cards by the light of a lamp. I ran into the room, and flung myself on the bed beside my mother, and said:

As soon as I saw his umbrella, I sprinted to my mom's room. My mom and grandma were sitting across from each other, playing cards by the lamp's light. I burst into the room, threw myself on the bed next to my mom, and said:

"Mother dear, the tutor has come, and I have such a bad headache; couldn't I have no lessons today?"

"Mom, the tutor is here, and I have such a bad headache; can I skip my lessons today?"

I hope no child of immature age will be allowed to read this story, and I sincerely trust it will not be used in text-books or primers for schools. For what I did was dreadfully bad, and I received no punishment whatever. On the contrary, my wickedness was crowned with success.

I hope no young child will be allowed to read this story, and I truly trust it won't be included in school textbooks or reading materials. Because what I did was really wrong, and I faced no consequences at all. In fact, my wrongdoing was rewarded with success.

My mother said to me: "All right," and turning to the servant added: "Tell the tutor that he can go back home."

My mom said to me, "Okay," and turned to the servant, adding, "Let the tutor know he can go home."

It was perfectly plain that she didn't think my illness very serious, as she went on with her game as before, and took no further notice. And I also, burying my head in the pillow, laughed to my heart's content. We perfectly understood one another, my mother and I.

It was obvious that she didn't see my illness as serious at all, since she continued her game just like before and didn't pay any more attention to me. And I, burying my head in the pillow, laughed as much as I wanted. My mother and I completely understood each other.

But every one must know how hard it is for a boy of seven years old to keep up the illusion of illness for a long time. After about a minute I got hold of Grandmother, and said: "Grannie, do tell me a story."

But everyone knows how tough it is for a seven-year-old boy to maintain the act of being sick for long. After about a minute, I grabbed Grandma and said, "Granny, please tell me a story."

I had to ask this many times. Grannie and Mother went on playing cards, and took no notice. At last Mother said to me: "Child, don't bother. Wait till we've finished our game." But I persisted: "Grannie, do tell me a story." I told Mother she could finish her game to-morrow, but she must let Grannie tell me a story there and then.

I had to ask this many times. Grandma and Mom kept playing cards and didn’t pay any attention. Finally, Mom said to me, “Honey, don’t bother us. Just wait until we finish our game.” But I kept insisting, “Grandma, please tell me a story.” I told Mom she could finish her game tomorrow, but she had to let Grandma tell me a story right now.

At last Mother threw down the cards and said: "You had better do what he wants. I can't manage him." Perhaps she had it in her mind that she would have no tiresome tutor on the morrow, while I should be obliged to be back to those stupid lessons.

At last, Mom tossed the cards down and said, "You should just do what he wants. I can't handle him." Maybe she was thinking that she wouldn't have to deal with a boring tutor tomorrow, while I would have to go back to those dumb lessons.

As soon as ever Mother had given way, I rushed at Grannie. I got hold of her hand, and, dancing with delight, dragged her inside my mosquito curtain on to the bed. I clutched hold of the bolster with both hands in my excitement, and jumped up and down with joy, and when I had got a little quieter, said: "Now, Grannie, let' s have the story!"

As soon as Mother let me go, I ran over to Grannie. I grabbed her hand and, filled with joy, pulled her inside my mosquito net onto the bed. I held onto the pillow with both hands, bouncing up and down with excitement, and when I calmed down a bit, I said, "Now, Grannie, let's hear the story!"

Grannie went on: "And the king had a queen." That was good to begin with. He had only one.

Grannie continued, "And the king had a queen." That was a good start. He only had one.

It is usual for kings in fairy stories to be extravagant in queens. And whenever we hear that there are two queens, our hearts begin to sink. One is sure to be unhappy. But in Grannie's story that danger was past. He had only one queen.

It’s common in fairy tales for kings to be extravagant with queens. And whenever we hear there are two queens, our hearts start to sink. One is bound to be unhappy. But in Grannie’s story, that threat was gone. He had only one queen.

We next hear that the king had not got any son. At the age of seven I didn't think there was any need to bother if a man had had no son. He might only have been in the way. Nor are we greatly excited when we hear that the king has gone away into the forest to practise austerities in order to get a son. There was only one thing that would have made me go into the forest, and that was to get away from my tutor!

We then learn that the king didn’t have any sons. When I was seven, I didn’t see why it mattered if a man had no son. He might have just been a burden. We aren’t particularly thrilled to hear that the king has gone into the forest to meditate and try to have a son. The only reason I would have gone into the forest was to escape from my tutor!

But the king left behind with his queen a small girl, who grew up into a beautiful princess.

But the king left behind a little girl with his queen, who grew up to be a beautiful princess.

Twelve years pass away, and the king goes on practising austerities, and never thinks all this while of his beautiful daughter. The princess has reached the full bloom of her youth. The age of marriage has passed, but the king does not return. And the queen pines away with grief and cries: "Is my golden daughter destined to die unmarried? Ah me! What a fate is mine."

Twelve years go by, and the king continues to practice austerities, never thinking about his beautiful daughter. The princess has come into the prime of her youth. The time for marriage has passed, but the king still hasn’t returned. The queen is heartbroken and cries out: "Is my golden daughter destined to remain unmarried? Oh no! What a fate I have."

Then the queen sent men to the king to entreat him earnestly to come back for a single night and take one meal in the palace. And the king consented.

Then the queen sent men to the king to seriously ask him to come back for one night and have a meal in the palace. And the king agreed.

The queen cooked with her own hand, and with the greatest care, sixty-four dishes, and made a seat for him of sandal-wood, and arranged the food in plates of gold and cups of silver. The princess stood behind with the peacock-tail fan in her hand. The king, after twelve years' absence, came into the house, and the princess waved the fan, lighting up all the room with her beauty. The king looked in his daughter's face, and forgot to take his food.

The queen personally prepared sixty-four dishes with great care, created a sandalwood seat for him, and arranged the food on golden plates and in silver cups. The princess stood behind him, holding a peacock-feather fan. After being away for twelve years, the king returned home, and the princess waved the fan, brightening the entire room with her beauty. The king gazed at his daughter's face and forgot to eat.

At last he asked his queen: "Pray, who is this girl whose beauty shines as the gold image of the goddess? Whose daughter is she?"

At last, he asked his queen, "Please tell me, who is this girl whose beauty shines like the golden statue of the goddess? Whose daughter is she?"

The queen beat her forehead, and cried: "Ah, how evil is my fate! Do you not know your own daughter?"

The queen hit her forehead and exclaimed, "Ah, how terrible is my fate! Don't you recognize your own daughter?"

The king was struck with amazement. He said at last; "My tiny daughter has grown to be a woman."

The king was filled with wonder. He finally said, "My little daughter has grown into a woman."

"What else?" the queen said with a sigh. "Do you not know that twelve years have passed by?"

"What else?" the queen said with a sigh. "Don’t you realize that twelve years have gone by?"

"But why did you not give her in marriage?" asked the king.

"But why didn't you marry her off?" asked the king.

"You were away," the queen said. "And how could I find her a suitable husband?"

"You were gone," the queen said. "And how was I supposed to find her a suitable husband?"

The king became vehement with excitement. "The first man I see to-morrow," he said, "when I come out of the palace shall marry her."

The king was filled with excitement. "The first man I see tomorrow," he said, "when I come out of the palace will marry her."

The princess went on waving her fan of peacock feathers, and the king finished his meal.

The princess kept waving her peacock feather fan while the king finished his meal.

The next morning, as the king came out of his palace, he saw the son of a Brahman gathering sticks in the forest outside the palace gates. His age was about seven or eight.

The next morning, when the king left his palace, he saw a Brahman's son collecting sticks in the forest outside the palace gates. He was around seven or eight years old.

The king said: "I will marry my daughter to him."

The king said, "I'm going to marry my daughter to him."

Who can interfere with a king's command? At once the boy was called, and the marriage garlands were exchanged between him and the princess.

Who can challenge a king's order? Immediately, the boy was summoned, and the marriage garlands were exchanged between him and the princess.

At this point I came up close to my wise Grannie and asked her eagerly: "What then?"

At that moment, I leaned in close to my wise Grandma and asked her eagerly, "What then?"

In the bottom of my heart there was a devout wish to substitute myself for that fortunate wood-gatherer of seven years old. The night was resonant with the patter of rain. The earthen lamp by my bedside was burning low. My grandmother's voice droned on as she told the story. And all these things served to create in a corner of my credulous heart the belief that I had been gathering sticks in the dawn of some indefinite time in the kingdom of some unknown king, and in a moment garlands had been exchanged between me and the princess, beautiful as the Goddess of Grace. She had a gold band on her hair and gold earrings in her ears. She bad a necklace and bracelets of gold, and a golden waist-chain round her waist, and a pair of golden anklets tinkled above her feet.

In the bottom of my heart, I really wanted to trade places with that lucky seven-year-old wood-gatherer. The night was filled with the sound of rain. The earthen lamp by my bedside was dimming. My grandmother's voice droned on as she told the story. All of this made me believe in a small part of my trusting heart that I had been gathering sticks at dawn in some distant time in the kingdom of an unknown king, and for a moment, garlands had been exchanged between me and a princess, beautiful like the Goddess of Grace. She had a gold band in her hair and gold earrings in her ears. She wore a gold necklace and bracelets, a golden waist-chain, and a pair of golden anklets that jingled above her feet.

If my grandmother were an author how many explanations she would have to offer for this little story! First of all, every one would ask why the king remained twelve years in the forest? Secondly, why should the king's daughter remain unmarried all that while? This would be regarded as absurd.

If my grandmother were an author, she would have to explain a lot about this little story! First of all, everyone would ask why the king spent twelve years in the forest. Secondly, why did the king's daughter stay unmarried all that time? That would be seen as ridiculous.

Even if she could have got so far without a quarrel, still there would have been a great hue and cry about the marriage itself. First, it never happened. Secondly, how could there be a marriage between a princess of the Warrior Caste and a boy of the priestly Brahman Caste? Her readers would have imagined at once that the writer was preaching against our social customs in an underhand way. And they would write letters to the papers.

Even if she could have made it that far without a fight, there would still have been a huge uproar about the marriage itself. First, it never took place. Second, how could there be a marriage between a princess of the Warrior Caste and a boy from the priestly Brahman Caste? Her readers would have instantly thought that the writer was subtly criticizing our social customs. And they would write letters to the newspapers.

So I pray with all my heart that my grandmother may be born a grandmother again, and not through some cursed fate take birth as her luckless grandson.

So I sincerely hope that my grandmother gets to be a grandmother again, and not, due to some unfortunate fate, be reborn as her unlucky grandson.

So with a throb of joy and delight, I asked Grannie: "What then?"

So, feeling a rush of happiness, I asked Grannie, "What then?"

Grannie went on: Then the princess took her little husband away in great distress, and built a large palace with seven wings, and began to cherish her husband with great care.

Grannie continued: Then the princess took her little husband away in great distress, built a huge palace with seven wings, and started to take care of her husband with great love.

I jumped up and down in my bed and clutched at the bolster more tightly than ever and said: "What then?"

I jumped up and down on my bed, gripping the pillow tighter than ever, and said, "So what now?"

Grannie continued: The little boy went to school and learnt many lessons from his teachers, and as he grew up his class-fellows began to ask him: "Who is that beautiful lady who lives with you in the palace with the seven wings?" The Brahman's son was eager to know who she was. He could only remember how one day he had been gathering sticks, and a great disturbance arose. But all that was so long ago, that he had no clear recollection.

Grannie continued: The little boy went to school and learned many lessons from his teachers, and as he grew up, his classmates began to ask him: "Who is that beautiful woman who lives with you in the palace with the seven wings?" The Brahman's son was eager to know who she was. He could only remember a day when he had been collecting sticks, and there had been a huge commotion. But that was so long ago that he had no clear memory of it.

Four or five years passed in this way. His companions always asked him: "Who is that beautiful lady in the palace with the seven wings?" And the Brahman's son would come back from school and sadly tell the princess: "My school companions always ask me who is that beautiful lady in the palace with the seven wings, and I can give them no reply. Tell me, oh, tell me, who you are!"

Four or five years went by like this. His friends would always ask him, "Who is that beautiful lady in the palace with the seven wings?" And the Brahman's son would come home from school and, feeling down, tell the princess, "My school friends keep asking me who that beautiful lady in the palace with the seven wings is, and I have no answer for them. Please, oh please, tell me who you are!"

The princess said: "Let it pass to-day. I will tell you some other day." And every day the Brahman's son would ask; "Who are you?" and the princess would reply: "Let it pass to-day. I will tell you some other day." In this manner four or five more years passed away.

The princess said, "Let’s skip it today. I’ll tell you some other time." And every day the Brahman's son would ask, "Who are you?" and the princess would respond, "Let’s skip it today. I’ll tell you some other time." This went on for another four or five years.

At last the Brahman's son became very impatient, and said: "If you do not tell me to-day who you are, O beautiful lady, I will leave this palace with the seven wings." Then the princess said: "I will certainly tell you to-morrow."

At last, the Brahman's son grew very impatient and said, "If you don't tell me today who you are, beautiful lady, I will leave this palace with the seven wings." The princess replied, "I will definitely tell you tomorrow."

Next day the Brahman's son, as soon as he came home from school, said: "Now, tell me who you are." The princess said: "To-night I will tell you after supper, when you are in bed."

Next day the Brahman's son, as soon as he got home from school, said: "Now, tell me who you are." The princess replied: "Tonight I will tell you after dinner, when you're in bed."

The Brahman's son said: "Very well "; and he began to count the hours in expectation of the night. And the princess, on her side, spread white flowers over the golden bed, and lighted a gold lamp with fragrant oil, and adorned her hair, and dressed herself in a beautiful robe of blue, and began to count the hours in expectation of the night.

The Brahman's son said, "Alright," and he started counting the hours, waiting for the night. Meanwhile, the princess spread white flowers over the golden bed, lit a gold lamp with sweet-smelling oil, styled her hair, put on a beautiful blue robe, and began counting the hours, anticipating the night.

That evening when her husband, the Brahman's son, had finished his meal, too excited almost to eat, and had gone to the golden bed in the bed-chamber strewn with flowers, he said to himself: "To-night I shall surely know who this beautiful lady is in the palace with the seven wings."

That evening, after her husband, the Brahman's son, finished his meal—too excited to eat—and went to the golden bed in the flower-strewn bedroom, he thought to himself, "Tonight I will finally find out who this beautiful lady is in the palace with the seven wings."

The princess took for her the food that was left over by her husband, and slowly entered the bed-chamber. She had to answer that night the question, which was the beautiful lady who lived in the palace with the seven wings. And as she went up to the bed to tell him she found a serpent had crept out of the flowers and had bitten the Brahman's son. Her boy-husband was lying on the bed of flowers, with face pale in death.

The princess picked up the food that was left over by her husband and slowly walked into the bedroom. That night, she had to respond to the question about the beautiful lady who lived in the palace with the seven wings. As she approached the bed to tell him, she discovered that a serpent had crawled out from the flowers and bitten the Brahman's son. Her boy-husband was lying on the flower bed, with a pale face, lifeless.

My heart suddenly ceased to throb, and I asked with choking voice: "What then?"

My heart suddenly stopped beating, and I asked with a shaky voice, "What then?"

Grannie said; "Then..."

Granny said, "Then..."

But what is the use of going on any further with the story? It would only lead on to what was more and more impossible. The boy of seven did not know that, if there were some "What then?" after death, no grandmother of a grandmother could tell us all about it.

But what's the point of continuing with the story? It would just lead to things that are even more impossible. The seven-year-old boy didn't realize that if there is a "What then?" after death, no grandmother, or even the grandmother of a grandmother, could explain it to us.

But the child's faith never admits defeat, and it would snatch at the mantle of death itself to turn him back. It would be outrageous for him to think that such a story of one teacherless evening could so suddenly come to a stop. Therefore the grandmother had to call back her story from the ever-shut chamber of the great End, but she does it so simply: it is merely by floating the dead body on a banana stem on the river, and having some incantations read by a magician. But in that rainy night and in the dim light of a lamp death loses all its horror in the mind of the boy, and seems nothing more than a deep slumber of a single night. When the story ends the tired eyelids are weighed down with sleep. Thus it is that we send the little body of the child floating on the back of sleep over the still water of time, and then in the morning read a few verses of incantation to restore him to the world of life and light.

But the child's faith never gives up, and it would reach for the very edge of death to bring him back. It would be ridiculous for him to think that such a story of one teacherless evening could come to an end so suddenly. So, the grandmother has to pull her story back from the always-closed door of the great End, but she does it so easily: by simply floating the dead body on a banana stem on the river and having a magician read some incantations. But on that rainy night and in the dim light of a lamp, death loses all its terror in the boy's mind, appearing as nothing more than a deep sleep for just one night. When the story wraps up, his tired eyelids grow heavy with sleep. This is how we send the little body of the child drifting on the waves of sleep over the still waters of time, and then in the morning, we read a few verses of incantation to bring him back to the world of life and light.





THE HOME-COMING

Phatik Chakravorti was ringleader among the boys of the village. A new mischief got into his head. There was a heavy log lying on the mud-flat of the river waiting to be shaped into a mast for a boat. He decided that they should all work together to shift the log by main force from its place and roll it away. The owner of the log would be angry and surprised, and they would all enjoy the fun. Every one seconded the proposal, and it was carried unanimously.

Phatik Chakravorti was the leader of the boys in the village. A new idea popped into his head. There was a big log resting on the muddy riverbank, waiting to be turned into a mast for a boat. He suggested that they all team up to move the log by sheer strength and roll it away. The owner of the log would be both angry and surprised, and they would all have a good time. Everyone agreed with the plan, and it was accepted without any objections.

But just as the fun was about to begin, Makhan, Phatik's younger brother, sauntered up, and sat down on the log in front of them all without a word. The boys were puzzled for a moment. He was pushed, rather timidly, by one of the boys and told to get up but he remained quite unconcerned. He appeared like a young philosopher meditating on the futility of games. Phatik was furious. "Makhan," he cried, "if you don't get down this minute I'll thrash you!"

But just when the fun was about to start, Makhan, Phatik's younger brother, strolled over and sat down on the log in front of everyone without saying a word. The boys were confused for a moment. One of them pushed him, a bit hesitantly, and told him to get up, but he stayed completely unfazed. He looked like a young philosopher pondering the pointlessness of games. Phatik was furious. "Makhan," he yelled, "if you don't get down right now, I'm going to hit you!"

Makhan only moved to a more comfortable position.

Makhan just shifted to a more comfortable position.

Now, if Phatik was to keep his regal dignity before the public, it was clear he ought to carry out his threat. But his courage failed him at the crisis. His fertile brain, however, rapidly seized upon a new manoeuvre which would discomfit his brother and afford his followers an added amusement. He gave the word of command to roll the log and Makhan over together. Makhan heard the order, and made it a point of honour to stick on. But he overlooked the fact, like those who attempt earthly fame in other matters, that there was peril in it.

Now, if Phatik wanted to maintain his royal dignity in front of everyone, it was clear he had to follow through on his threat. But at the crucial moment, he lost his nerve. Fortunately, his quick-thinking mind came up with a new plan that would embarrass his brother and give his followers even more amusement. He ordered the log to be rolled over with Makhan still on it. Makhan heard the command and made it a point of honor to stay put. But he failed to realize, like many who seek fame in other areas, that there was a real danger in doing so.

The boys began to heave at the log with all their might, calling out, "One, two, three, go," At the word "go" the log went; and with it went Makhan's philosophy, glory and all.

The boys started to push the log with all their strength, shouting, "One, two, three, go." At the word "go," the log moved, taking with it all of Makhan's philosophy, glory, and everything else.

All the other boys shouted themselves hoarse with delight. But Phatik was a little frightened. He knew what was coming. And, sure enough, Makhan rose from Mother Earth blind as Fate and screaming like the Furies. He rushed at Phatik and scratched his face and beat him and kicked him, and then went crying home. The first act of the drama was over.

All the other boys yelled themselves hoarse with excitement. But Phatik felt a bit scared. He knew what was coming. And sure enough, Makhan burst out from the ground, blind with rage and screaming like a wild beast. He charged at Phatik, scratching his face, hitting him, and kicking him, and then he ran home crying. The first act of the drama was over.

Phatik wiped his face, and sat down on the edge of a sunken barge on the river bank, and began to chew a piece of grass. A boat came up to the landing, and a middle-aged man, with grey hair and dark moustache, stepped on shore. He saw the boy sitting there doing nothing, and asked him where the Chakravortis lived. Phatik went on chewing the grass, and said: "Over there," but it was quite impossible to tell where he pointed. The stranger asked him again. He swung his legs to and fro on the side of the barge, and said; "Go and find out," and continued to chew the grass as before.

Phatik wiped his face and sat down on the edge of a sunken barge by the riverbank, starting to chew on a piece of grass. A boat arrived at the landing, and a middle-aged man with gray hair and a dark mustache stepped onto the shore. He noticed the boy sitting there doing nothing and asked him where the Chakravortis lived. Phatik kept chewing the grass and said, "Over there," but it was impossible to tell where he was pointing. The stranger asked him again. Phatik swung his legs back and forth on the side of the barge and replied, "Go and find out," continuing to chew the grass as before.

But now a servant came down from the house, and told Phatik his mother wanted him. Phatik refused to move. But the servant was the master on this occasion. He took Phatik up roughly, and carried him, kicking and struggling in impotent rage.

But now a servant came down from the house and told Phatik that his mom wanted him. Phatik refused to move. But the servant was in charge this time. He picked up Phatik roughly and carried him, who was kicking and struggling in powerless anger.

When Phatik came into the house, his mother saw him. She called out angrily: "So you have been hitting Makhan again?"

When Phatik came into the house, his mother saw him. She shouted angrily, "So you’ve been hitting Makhan again?"

Phatik answered indignantly: "No, I haven't; who told you that?"

Phatik replied angrily, "No, I haven’t; who said that?"

His mother shouted: "Don't tell lies! You have."

His mother shouted, "Don't lie! You have."

Phatik said suddenly: "I tell you, I haven't. You ask Makhan!" But Makhan thought it best to stick to his previous statement. He said: "Yes, mother. Phatik did hit me."

Phatik suddenly said, "I swear I didn't! Ask Makhan!" But Makhan decided it was better to stay with his earlier statement. He replied, "Yes, mom. Phatik did hit me."

Phatik's patience was already exhausted. He could not hear this injustice. He rushed at Makban, and hammered him with blows: "Take that" he cried, "and that, and that, for telling lies."

Phatik's patience was already worn out. He couldn’t stand this unfairness anymore. Hecharged at Makban and hit him with punches: "Take that," he shouted, "and that, and that, for lying."

His mother took Makhan's side in a moment, and pulled Phatik away, beating him with her hands. When Phatik pushed her aside, she shouted out: "What I you little villain! would you hit your own mother?"

His mother quickly took Makhan's side and yanked Phatik away, hitting him with her hands. When Phatik shoved her aside, she yelled, "What’s wrong with you, you little brat! Are you really going to hit your own mother?"

It was just at this critical juncture that the grey-haired stranger arrived. He asked what was the matter. Phatik looked sheepish and ashamed.

It was right at this crucial moment that the gray-haired stranger showed up. He asked what was wrong. Phatik looked embarrassed and ashamed.

But when his mother stepped back and looked at the stranger, her anger was changed to surprise. For she recognised her brother, and cried: "Why, Dada! Where have you come from?" As she said these words, she bowed to the ground and touched his feet. Her brother had gone away soon after she had married, and he had started business in Bombay. His sister had lost her husband while he was In Bombay. Bishamber had now come back to Calcutta, and had at once made enquiries about his sister. He had then hastened to see her as soon as he found out where she was.

But when his mother stepped back and looked at the stranger, her anger turned to surprise. She recognized her brother and exclaimed, "Dada! Where have you come from?" As she said this, she bowed to the ground and touched his feet. Her brother had left soon after she got married and had started a business in Bombay. His sister had lost her husband while he was in Bombay. Bishamber had now returned to Calcutta and immediately asked about his sister. He rushed to see her as soon as he learned where she was.

The next few days were full of rejoicing. The brother asked after the education of the two boys. He was told by his sister that Phatik was a perpetual nuisance. He was lazy, disobedient, and wild. But Makhan was as good as gold, as quiet as a lamb, and very fond of reading, Bishamber kindly offered to take Phatik off his sister's hands, and educate him with his own children in Calcutta. The widowed mother readily agreed. When his uncle asked Phatik If he would like to go to Calcutta with him, his joy knew no bounds, and he said; "Oh, yes, uncle!" In a way that made it quite clear that he meant it.

The next few days were filled with celebration. The brother inquired about the education of the two boys. His sister told him that Phatik was a constant trouble. He was lazy, disobedient, and wild. But Makhan was as good as gold, as quiet as a lamb, and very fond of reading. Bishamber kindly offered to take Phatik off his sister's hands and educate him along with his own children in Calcutta. The widowed mother readily agreed. When his uncle asked Phatik if he would like to go to Calcutta with him, his joy knew no bounds, and he exclaimed, "Oh, yes, uncle!" in a way that made it clear he truly meant it.

It was an immense relief to the mother to get rid of Phatik. She had a prejudice against the boy, and no love was lost between the two brothers. She was in daily fear that he would either drown Makhan some day in the river, or break his head in a fight, or run him into some danger or other. At the same time she was somewhat distressed to see Phatik's extreme eagerness to get away.

It was a huge relief for the mother to be rid of Phatik. She didn't like the boy, and there was no affection between the two brothers. She constantly worried that he might either drown Makhan in the river, hurt him in a fight, or lead him into some kind of trouble. At the same time, she felt a bit sad to see how desperate Phatik was to leave.

Phatik, as soon as all was settled, kept asking his uncle every minute when they were to start. He was on pins and needles all day long with excitement, and lay awake most of the night. He bequeathed to Makhan, in perpetuity, his fishing-rod, his big kite and his marbles. Indeed, at this time of departure his generosity towards Makhan was unbounded.

Phatik, as soon as everything was settled, kept asking his uncle every minute when they were going to start. He was so excited all day long, and he lay awake for most of the night. He gave Makhan his fishing rod, his big kite, and his marbles to keep forever. In fact, at this moment of leaving, his generosity towards Makhan was limitless.

When they reached Calcutta, Phatik made the acquaintance of his aunt for the first time. She was by no means pleased with this unnecessary addition to her family. She found her own three boys quite enough to manage without taking any one else. And to bring a village lad of fourteen into their midst was terribly upsetting. Bishamber should really have thought twice before committing such an indiscretion.

When they arrived in Calcutta, Phatik met his aunt for the first time. She was definitely not happy about this unwanted addition to her family. She felt that her three boys were already enough to handle without bringing in someone else. Having a fourteen-year-old village boy around was extremely disruptive. Bishamber should have really thought twice before making such a rash decision.

In this world of human affairs there is no worse nuisance than a boy at the age of fourteen. He is neither ornamental, nor useful. It is impossible to shower affection on him as on a little boy; and he is always getting in the way. If he talks with a childish lisp he is called a baby, and if he answers in a grown-up way he is called impertinent. In fact any talk at all from him is resented. Then he is at the unattractive, growing age. He grows out of his clothes with indecent haste; his voice grows hoarse and breaks and quavers; his face grows suddenly angular and unsightly. It is easy to excuse the shortcomings of early childhood, but it is hard to tolerate even unavoidable lapses in a boy of fourteen. The lad himself becomes painfully self-conscious. When he talks with elderly people he is either unduly forward, or else so unduly shy that he appears ashamed of his very existence.

In this world of human interactions, there’s no greater annoyance than a fourteen-year-old boy. He’s neither attractive nor useful. It’s impossible to show him the same affection you would to a younger child, and he’s always getting in the way. If he speaks with a childish lisp, he’s called a baby, and if he responds in a mature manner, he’s labeled as rude. In fact, any attempt to communicate with him is often met with resentment. Plus, he’s at that awkward, growing age. He outgrows his clothes way too quickly; his voice becomes hoarse and cracks; his face suddenly becomes angular and hard to look at. It’s easy to overlook the flaws of young children, but it’s tough to accept even the inevitable mistakes of a fourteen-year-old boy. The boy himself becomes painfully self-conscious. When he talks to adults, he’s either overly confident or embarrassingly shy, making it seem like he’s ashamed to even be there.

Yet it is at this very age when in his heart of hearts a young lad most craves for recognition and love; and he becomes the devoted slave of any one who shows him consideration. But none dare openly love him, for that would be regarded as undue indulgence, and therefore bad for the boy. So, what with scolding and chiding, he becomes very much like a stray dog that has lost his master.

Yet it is at this age when a young boy truly longs for recognition and love; he becomes the devoted servant of anyone who shows him kindness. But no one dares to openly love him, as that would be seen as spoiling him, which is considered harmful for the boy. So, with all the scolding and nagging, he becomes very much like a lost dog searching for its owner.

For a boy of fourteen his own home is the only Paradise. To live in a strange house with strange people is little short of torture, while the height of bliss is to receive the kind looks of women, and never to be slighted by them.

For a fourteen-year-old boy, his own home is the only paradise. Living in a strange house with unfamiliar people feels like torture, while true happiness comes from receiving warm looks from women and never feeling overlooked by them.

It was anguish to Phatik to be the unwelcome guest in his aunt's house, despised by this elderly woman, and slighted, on every occasion. If she ever asked him to do anything for her, he would be so overjoyed that he would overdo it; and then she would tell him not to be so stupid, but to get on with his lessons.

Phatik felt devastated being the unwanted guest in his aunt's house, hated by this old woman, and dismissed at every turn. If she ever asked him to do anything, he would be so thrilled that he would go overboard; then she would tell him not to be so foolish and to focus on his studies.

The cramped atmosphere of neglect in his aunt's house oppressed Phatik so much that he felt that he could hardly breathe. He wanted to go out into the open country and fill his lungs and breathe freely. But there was no open country to go to. Surrounded on all sides by Calcutta houses and walls, he would dream night after night of his village home, and long to be back there. He remembered the glorious meadow where he used to fly his kite all day long; the broad river-banks where he would wander about the livelong day singing and shouting for joy; the narrow brook where he could go and dive and swim at any time he liked. He thought of his band of boy companions over whom he was despot; and, above all, the memory of that tyrant mother of his, who had such a prejudice against him, occupied him day and night. A kind of physical love like that of animals; a longing to be in the presence of the one who is loved; an inexpressible wistfulness during absence; a silent cry of the inmost heart for the mother, like the lowing of a calf in the twilight;-this love, which was almost an animal instinct, agitated the shy, nervous, lean, uncouth and ugly boy. No one could understand it, but it preyed upon his mind continually.

The cramped and neglected atmosphere of his aunt's house smothered Phatik to the point where he could barely breathe. He wanted to escape to the open countryside and fill his lungs with fresh air. But there was no open country to go to. Surrounded on all sides by Calcutta buildings and walls, he found himself dreaming night after night of his village home, longing to be back there. He remembered the beautiful meadow where he used to fly his kite all day; the wide riverbanks where he would roam around joyfully singing and shouting; the small brook where he could dive and swim whenever he wanted. He thought of his group of boy friends whom he ruled over; and most of all, he was haunted day and night by memories of his tyrant mother, who held such a bias against him. He felt a raw, animal-like love—an urge to be close to the one he loved; an indescribable yearning during her absence; a silent cry from deep within for his mother, like a calf calling out at dusk. This love, almost instinctual, troubled the shy, nervous, lean, awkward, and unattractive boy. No one could understand it, but it constantly weighed on his mind.

There was no more backward boy in the whole school than Phatik. He gaped and remained silent when the teacher asked him a question, and like an overladen ass patiently suffered all the blows that came down on his back. When other boys were out at play, he stood wistfully by the window and gazed at the roofs of the distant houses. And if by chance he espied children playing on the open terrace of any roof, his heart would ache with longing.

There was no more awkward boy in the whole school than Phatik. He stared blankly and stayed quiet when the teacher asked him a question, and like a burdened donkey, he endured all the criticism that came his way. When other boys were outside playing, he stood sadly by the window, looking at the rooftops of the distant houses. And if he happened to see kids playing on the open terrace of any roof, his heart would ache with longing.

One day he summoned up all his courage, and asked his uncle: "Uncle, when can I go home?"

One day he gathered all his courage and asked his uncle, "Uncle, when can I go home?"

His uncle answered; "Wait till the holidays come." But the holidays would not come till November, and there was a long time still to wait.

His uncle replied, "Just wait until the holidays." But the holidays wouldn't arrive until November, so there was still a long wait ahead.

One day Phatik lost his lesson-book. Even with the help of books he had found it very difficult indeed to prepare his lesson. Now it was impossible. Day after day the teacher would cane him unmercifully. His condition became so abjectly miserable that even his cousins were ashamed to own him. They began to jeer and insult him more than the other boys. He went to his aunt at last, and told her that he had lost his book.

One day, Phatik lost his textbook. Even with the help of other books, he had found it really hard to prepare his lessons. Now it was impossible. Day after day, the teacher would hit him mercilessly. His situation became so miserable that even his cousins were embarrassed to be associated with him. They started to mock and insult him more than the other boys. Finally, he went to his aunt and told her that he had lost his book.

His aunt pursed her lips in contempt, and said: "You great clumsy, country lout. How can I afford, with all my family, to buy you new books five times a month?"

His aunt pressed her lips together in disdain and said, "You big, clumsy country bumpkin. How can I possibly afford to buy you new books five times a month with my whole family to take care of?"

That night, on his way back from school, Phatik had a bad headache with a fit of shivering. He felt he was going to have an attack of malarial fever. His one great fear was that he would be a nuisance to his aunt.

That night, on his way home from school, Phatik had a terrible headache and was shaking. He felt like he was about to come down with malaria. His biggest worry was that he would be a burden to his aunt.

The next morning Phatik was nowhere to be seen. All searches in the neighbourhood proved futile. The rain had been pouring in torrents all night, and those who went out in search of the boy got drenched through to the skin. At last Bisbamber asked help from the police.

The next morning, Phatik was nowhere to be found. All searches in the neighborhood were unsuccessful. It had rained heavily all night, and anyone who went out looking for the boy got completely soaked. Finally, Bisbamber asked the police for help.

At the end of the day a police van stopped at the door before the house. It was still raining and the streets were all flooded. Two constables brought out Phatik in their arms and placed him before Bishamber. He was wet through from head to foot, muddy all over, his face and eyes flushed red with fever, and his limbs all trembling. Bishamber carried him in his arms, and took him into the inner apartments. When his wife saw him, she exclaimed; "What a heap of trouble this boy has given us. Hadn't you better send him home?"

At the end of the day, a police van pulled up in front of the house. It was still raining, and the streets were completely flooded. Two officers carried Phatik in their arms and set him down in front of Bishamber. He was soaked from head to toe, covered in mud, his face and eyes flushed red with fever, and his limbs were shaking. Bishamber picked him up and took him into the inner rooms. When his wife saw him, she exclaimed, "What a mess this boy has caused us. Wouldn't it be better to send him home?"

Phatik heard her words, and sobbed out loud: "Uncle, I was just going home; but they dragged me back again."

Phatik heard her words and cried out, "Uncle, I was just going home, but they pulled me back again."

The fever rose very high, and all that night the boy was delirious. Bishamber brought in a doctor. Phatik opened his eyes flushed with fever, and looked up to the ceiling, and said vacantly: "Uncle, have the holidays come yet? May I go home?"

The fever spiked, and all night long the boy was out of his head. Bishamber brought in a doctor. Phatik opened his eyes, heated with fever, and stared up at the ceiling, asking blankly, "Uncle, have the holidays started yet? Can I go home?"

Bishamber wiped the tears from his own eyes, and took Phatik's lean and burning hands in his own, and sat by him through the night. The boy began again to mutter. At last his voice became excited: "Mother," he cried, "don't beat me like that! Mother! I am telling the truth!"

Bishamber wiped away his own tears and took Phatik's thin, feverish hands in his. He stayed by his side throughout the night. The boy started to mumble again. Eventually, his voice grew more intense: "Mom," he cried, "please don't hit me like that! Mom! I'm telling the truth!"

The next day Phatik became conscious for a short time. He turned his eyes about the room, as if expecting some one to come. At last, with an air of disappointment, his head sank back on the pillow. He turned his face to the wall with a deep sigh.

The next day, Phatik briefly regained consciousness. He looked around the room, as if he was waiting for someone to arrive. Finally, feeling disappointed, he let his head rest back on the pillow. He turned his face toward the wall with a heavy sigh.

Bishamber knew his thoughts, and, bending down his head, whispered: "Phatik, I have sent for your mother." The day went by. The doctor said in a troubled voice that the boy's condition was very critical.

Bishamber understood his thoughts, and leaning down, whispered: "Phatik, I’ve called your mother." The day passed. The doctor said in a worried tone that the boy's condition was very serious.

Phatik began to cry out; "By the mark!—three fathoms. By the mark—four fathoms. By the mark-." He had heard the sailor on the river-steamer calling out the mark on the plumb-line. Now he was himself plumbing an unfathomable sea.

Phatik started to shout, "By the mark!—three fathoms. By the mark—four fathoms. By the mark—." He had listened to the sailor on the river steamer calling out the measurements from the plumb line. Now he was measuring an endless sea himself.

Later in the day Phatik's mother burst into the room like a whirlwind, and began to toss from side to side and moan and cry in a loud voice.

Later in the day, Phatik's mother rushed into the room like a whirlwind, starting to throw herself from side to side while moaning and crying out loudly.

Bishamber tried to calm her agitation, but she flung herself on the bed, and cried: "Phatik, my darling, my darling."

Bishamber tried to ease her anxiety, but she threw herself onto the bed and cried, "Phatik, my love, my love."

Phatik stopped his restless movements for a moment. His hands ceased beating up and down. He said: "Eh?"

Phatik paused his restless movements for a moment. His hands stopped moving up and down. He said, "Huh?"

The mother cried again: "Phatik, my darling, my darling."

The mother cried again, "Phatik, my dear, my dear."

Phatik very slowly turned his head and, without seeing anybody, said: "Mother, the holidays have come."

Phatik slowly turned his head and, without seeing anyone, said: "Mom, the holidays are here."





MY LORD, THE BABY

I

Raicharan was twelve years old when he came as a servant to his master's house. He belonged to the same caste as his master, and was given his master's little son to nurse. As time went on the boy left Raicharan's arms to go to school. From school he went on to college, and after college he entered the judicial service. Always, until he married, Raicharan was his sole attendant.

Raicharan was twelve years old when he started working as a servant in his master's house. He was from the same caste as his master and was assigned to take care of his master's little son. As time passed, the boy grew up and left Raicharan's care to attend school. After finishing school, he went to college, and then he joined the judicial service. Throughout all this time, until he got married, Raicharan remained his only attendant.

But, when a mistress came into the house, Raicharan found two masters instead of one. All his former influence passed to the new mistress. This was compensated for by a fresh arrival. Anukul had a son born to him, and Raicharan by his unsparing attentions soon got a complete hold over the child. He used to toss him up in his arms, call to him in absurd baby language, put his face close to the baby's and draw it away again with a grin.

But when a lady of the house arrived, Raicharan discovered he had two bosses instead of one. All his previous influence shifted to the new lady. This was balanced out by a new arrival. Anukul had a son, and Raicharan, with his relentless care, quickly gained full control over the child. He would lift him in the air, talk to him in silly baby talk, bring his face close to the baby’s and then pull it away with a grin.

Presently the child was able to crawl and cross the doorway. When Raicharan went to catch him, he would scream with mischievous laughter and make for safety. Raicharan was amazed at the profound skill and exact judgment the baby showed when pursued. He would say to his mistress with a look of awe and mystery: "Your son will be a judge some day."

Right now the child could crawl and get across the doorway. When Raicharan tried to catch him, he would squeal with playful laughter and dash for safety. Raicharan was impressed by the remarkable skill and precise judgment the baby displayed when being chased. He would tell his mistress with a look of wonder and intrigue: "Your son will be a judge someday."

New wonders came in their turn. When the baby began to toddle, that was to Raicharan an epoch in human history. When he called his father Ba-ba and his mother Ma-ma and Raicharan Chan-na, then Raicharan's ecstasy knew no bounds. He went out to tell the news to all the world.

New wonders came one after another. When the baby started to walk, it felt like a major milestone in Raicharan's life. When he called his father Ba-ba and his mother Ma-ma, and then referred to Raicharan as Chan-na, Raicharan was overjoyed. He rushed out to share the news with everyone.

After a while Raicharan was asked to show his ingenuity in other ways. He had, for instance, to play the part of a horse, holding the reins between his teeth and prancing with his feet. He had also to wrestle with his little charge, and if he could not, by a wrestler's trick, fall on his back defeated at the end, a great outcry was certain.

After a while, Raicharan was asked to demonstrate his skills in other ways. He had to, for example, act like a horse, holding the reins between his teeth and prancing around. He also had to wrestle with his small charge, and if he couldn't, using a wrestler's trick, fall on his back pretending to be defeated at the end, there would definitely be a big outcry.

About this time Anukul was transferred to a district on the banks of the Padma. On his way through Calcutta he bought his son a little go-cart. He bought him also a yellow satin waistcoat, a gold-laced cap, and some gold bracelets and anklets. Raicharan was wont to take these out, and put them on his little charge with ceremonial pride, whenever they went for a walk.

About this time, Anukul was assigned to a district along the banks of the Padma. On his way through Calcutta, he bought his son a little go-cart. He also got him a yellow satin waistcoat, a gold-laced cap, and some gold bracelets and anklets. Raicharan would often take these out and put them on his little charge with ceremonial pride whenever they went for a walk.

Then came the rainy season, and day after day the rain poured down in torrents. The hungry river, like an enormous serpent, swallowed down terraces, villages, cornfields, and covered with its flood the tall grasses and wild casuarinas on the sand-banks. From time to time there was a deep thud, as the river-banks crumbled. The unceasing roar of the rain current could be beard from far away. Masses of foam, carried swiftly past, proved to the eye the swiftness of the stream.

Then the rainy season hit, and day after day, the rain came down in heavy sheets. The hungry river, like a giant snake, swallowed terraces, villages, cornfields, and flooded over the tall grasses and wild casuarinas on the sandbanks. Occasionally, there was a loud thud as the riverbanks gave way. The constant roar of the rushing water could be heard from far away. Chunks of foam, rushing by quickly, showed just how fast the stream was moving.

One afternoon the rain cleared. It was cloudy, but cool and bright. Raicharan's little despot did not want to stay in on such a fine afternoon. His lordship climbed into the go-cart. Raicharan, between the shafts, dragged him slowly along till he reached the rice-fields on the banks of the river. There was no one in the fields, and no boat on the stream. Across the water, on the farther side, the clouds were rifted in the west. The silent ceremonial of the setting sun was revealed in all its glowing splendour. In the midst of that stillness the child, all of a sudden, pointed with his finger in front of him and cried: "Chan-nal Pitty fow."

One afternoon, the rain stopped. It was cloudy, but cool and bright. Raicharan's little tyrant didn’t want to stay inside on such a nice afternoon. His lordship climbed into the go-cart. Raicharan, between the shafts, pulled him slowly until they reached the rice fields by the riverbank. There was no one in the fields and no boat in the water. Across the river, on the far side, the clouds parted in the west. The silent ritual of the setting sun was revealed in all its glowing beauty. In the midst of that stillness, the child suddenly pointed ahead and shouted, "Chan-nal Pitty fow."

Close by on a mud-flat stood a large Kadamba tree in full flower. My lord, the baby, looked at it with greedy eyes, and Raicharan knew his meaning. Only a short time before he had made, out of these very flower balls, a small go-cart; and the child had been so entirely happy dragging it about with a string, that for the whole day Raicharan was not made to put on the reins at all. He was promoted from a horse into a groom.

Close by on a mudflat stood a large Kadamba tree in full bloom. My lord, the baby, gazed at it with eager eyes, and Raicharan understood what he wanted. Not long ago, he had made a small go-cart out of those very flower balls; the child had been so thrilled pulling it around with a string that Raicharan didn't have to put on the reins all day. He was upgraded from a horse to a groom.

But Raicharan had no wish that evening to go splashing knee-deep through the mud to reach the flowers. So he quickly pointed his finger in the opposite direction, calling out: "Oh, look, baby, look! Look at the bird." And with all sorts of curious noises he pushed the go-cart rapidly away from the tree.

But Raicharan didn't want to wade through the mud that evening to get to the flowers. So he quickly pointed his finger in the other direction, shouting: "Oh, look, baby, look! Look at the bird." And making all kinds of curious sounds, he swiftly pushed the go-cart away from the tree.

But a child, destined to be a judge, cannot be put off so easily. And besides, there was at the time nothing to attract his eyes. And you cannot keep up for ever the pretence of an imaginary bird.

But a child, who is meant to be a judge, can't be deterred so easily. Besides, there was nothing at that time to catch his attention. And you can't maintain the illusion of an imaginary bird forever.

The little Master's mind was made up, and Raicharan was at his wits' end. "Very well, baby," he said at last, "you sit still in the cart, and I'll go and get you the pretty flower. Only mind you don't go near the water."

The little Master's mind was set, and Raicharan was feeling desperate. "Alright, kid," he finally said, "you stay right here in the cart, and I'll go get you the pretty flower. Just make sure you don’t get too close to the water."

As he said this, he made his legs bare to the knee, and waded through the oozing mud towards the tree.

As he said this, he rolled up his pant legs and waded through the thick mud towards the tree.

The moment Raicharan had gone, his little Master went off at racing speed to the forbidden water. The baby saw the river rushing by, splashing and gurgling as it went. It seemed as though the disobedient wavelets themselves were running away from some greater Raicharan with the laughter of a thousand children. At the sight of their mischief, the heart of the human child grew excited and restless. He got down stealthily from the go-cart and toddled off towards the river. On his way he picked up a small stick, and leant over the bank of the stream pretending to fish. The mischievous fairies of the river with their mysterious voices seemed inviting him into their play-house.

The moment Raicharan left, his little Master took off at full speed toward the forbidden water. The baby watched the river rush by, splashing and gurgling along the way. It felt as if the cheeky waves were escaping from some greater Raicharan, filled with the laughter of a thousand children. Seeing their mischief, the child’s heart raced with excitement and restlessness. He quietly climbed down from the go-cart and wandered toward the river. On his way, he picked up a small stick and leaned over the bank of the stream, pretending to fish. The playful fairies of the river, with their mysterious voices, seemed to beckon him into their magical playhouse.

Raicharan had plucked a handful of flowers from the tree, and was carrying them back in the end of his cloth, with his face wreathed in smiles. But when he reached the go-cart, there was no one there. He looked on all sides and there was no one there. He looked back at the cart and there was no one there.

Raicharan had picked a bunch of flowers from the tree and was carrying them back in the end of his cloth, his face beaming with smiles. But when he got to the go-cart, no one was there. He looked around, and there was still no one. He glanced back at the cart, and it was empty.

In that first terrible moment his blood froze within him. Before his eyes the whole universe swam round like a dark mist. From the depth of his broken heart he gave one piercing cry; "Master, Master, little Master."

In that first terrible moment, his blood ran cold. Before his eyes, the whole universe blurred like dark fog. From the depths of his shattered heart, he let out a piercing cry: "Master, Master, little Master."

But no voice answered "Chan-na." No child laughed mischievously back; no scream of baby delight welcomed his return. Only the river ran on, with its splashing, gurgling noise as before,—as though it knew nothing at all, and had no time to attend to such a tiny human event as the death of a child.

But no one responded to "Chan-na." No child laughed playfully in return; no joyful scream welcomed him back. Only the river continued flowing, splashing and gurgling as usual—like it was totally unaware and had no interest in such a small human event as the death of a child.

As the evening passed by Raicharan's mistress became very anxious. She sent men out on all sides to search. They went with lanterns in their hands, and reached at last the banks of the Padma. There they found Raicharan rushing up and down the fields, like a stormy wind, shouting the cry of despair: "Master, Master, little Master!"

As the evening went on, Raicharan's mistress grew increasingly worried. She sent men in every direction to search for him. They carried lanterns and eventually reached the banks of the Padma. There, they found Raicharan running frantically through the fields, like a wild wind, shouting in desperation: "Master, Master, little Master!"

When they got Raicharan home at last, he fell prostrate at his mistress's feet. They shook him, and questioned him, and asked him repeatedly where he had left the child; but all he could say was, that he knew nothing.

When they finally brought Raicharan home, he collapsed at his mistress's feet. They shook him, questioned him, and kept asking where he had left the child, but all he could say was that he didn't know anything.

Though every one held the opinion that the Padma had swallowed the child, there was a lurking doubt left in the mind. For a band of gipsies had been noticed outside the village that afternoon, and some suspicion rested on them. The mother went so far in her wild grief as to think it possible that Raicharan himself had stolen the child. She called him aside with piteous entreaty and said: "Raicharan, give me back my baby. Oh! give me back my child. Take from me any money you ask, but give me back my child!"

Though everyone believed that the Padma had taken the child, there was still a lingering doubt. A group of gypsies had been spotted outside the village that afternoon, and they raised some suspicions. In her intense grief, the mother even considered the possibility that Raicharan himself had stolen the child. She pulled him aside with a desperate plea and said: "Raicharan, please give me back my baby. Oh! give me back my child. Take any money you want from me, but just give me back my child!"

Raicharan only beat his forehead in reply. His mistress ordered him out of the house.

Raicharan just hit his forehead in response. His mistress told him to leave the house.

Artukul tried to reason his wife out of this wholly unjust suspicion: "Why on earth," he said, "should he commit such a crime as that?"

Artukul tried to convince his wife to let go of this completely unfair suspicion: "Why on earth," he said, "would he do something like that?"

The mother only replied: "The baby had gold ornaments on his body. Who knows?"

The mother just said, "The baby had gold jewelry on him. Who knows?"

It was impossible to reason with her after that.

It was impossible to talk sense into her after that.

II

II

Raicharan went back to his own village. Up to this time he had had no son, and there was no hope that any child would now be born to him. But it came about before the end of a year that his wife gave birth to a son and died.

Raicharan returned to his village. Until that moment, he hadn't had a son, and there was no expectation that he would have any children. However, before the end of the year, his wife gave birth to a son and then passed away.

All overwhelming resentment at first grew up in Raicharan's heart at the sight of this new baby. At the back of his mind was resentful suspicion that it had come as a usurper in place of the little Master. He also thought it would be a grave offence to be happy with a son of his own after what had happened to his master's little child. Indeed, if it had not been for a widowed sister, who mothered the new baby, it would not have lived long.

All the intense resentment initially built up in Raicharan's heart at the sight of this new baby. Deep down, he harbored a bitter suspicion that it had arrived as a usurper, taking the place of the little Master. He also believed it would be a serious offense to feel happy about having a son of his own after what had happened to his master's little child. In fact, if it hadn't been for a widowed sister who cared for the new baby, it likely wouldn't have survived long.

But a change gradually came over Raicharan's mind. A wonderful thing happened. This new baby in turn began to crawl about, and cross the doorway with mischief in its face. It also showed an amusing cleverness in making its escape to safety. Its voice, its sounds of laughter and tears, its gestures, were those of the little Master. On some days, when Raicharan listened to its crying, his heart suddenly began thumping wildly against his ribs, and it seemed to him that his former little Master was crying somewhere in the unknown land of death because he had lost his Chan-na.

But gradually, Raicharan began to change. Something amazing happened. The new baby started crawling around, mischievously crossing the doorway. It also displayed a funny cleverness in escaping to safety. Its voice, its sounds of laughter and tears, and its gestures were just like those of the little Master. Some days, when Raicharan heard the baby crying, his heart would start racing against his chest, and it felt to him like his former little Master was crying somewhere in the unknown land of death because he had lost his Chan-na.

Phailna (for that was the name Raicharan's sister gave to the new baby) soon began to talk. It learnt to say Ba-ba and Ma-ma with a baby accent. When Raicharan heard those familiar sounds the mystery suddenly became clear. The little Master could not cast off the spell of his Chan-na, and therefore he had been reborn in his own house.

Phailna (that was the name Raicharan's sister chose for the new baby) soon started to talk. It learned to say Ba-ba and Ma-ma with a baby voice. When Raicharan heard those familiar sounds, everything suddenly made sense. The little Master couldn’t break free from the spell of his Chan-na, so he had been reborn in his own home.

The arguments in favour of this were, to Raicharan, altogether beyond dispute:

The reasons for this were, to Raicharan, completely undeniable:

(i.) The new baby was born soon after his little master's death.

(i.) The new baby was born shortly after his little master's death.

(ii.) His wife could never have accumulated such merit as to give birth to a son in middle age.

(ii.) His wife could never have built up enough good karma to have a son in her middle age.

(iii.) The new baby walked with a toddle and called out Ba-ba and Ma-ma. There was no sign lacking which marked out the future judge.

(iii.) The new baby walked with a waddle and called out Ba-ba and Ma-ma. There was no indication missing that marked the future judge.

Then suddenly Raicharan remembered that terrible accusation of the mother. "Ah," he said to himself with amazement, "the mother's heart was right. She knew I had stolen her child." When once he had come to this conclusion, he was filled with remorse for his past neglect. He now gave himself over, body and soul, to the new baby, and became its devoted attendant. He began to bring it up, as if it were the son of a rich man. He bought a go-cart, a yellow satin waistcoat, and a gold-embroidered cap. He melted down the ornaments of his dead wife, and made gold bangles and anklets. He refused to let the little child play with any one of the neighbourhood, and became himself its sole companion day and night. As the baby grew up to boyhood, he was so petted and spoilt and clad in such finery that the village children would call him "Your Lordship," and jeer at him; and older people regarded Raicharan as unaccountably crazy about the child.

Then, all of a sudden, Raicharan remembered that awful accusation from the mother. "Oh," he said to himself in disbelief, "the mother's instinct was right. She knew I had taken her child." Once he reached that conclusion, he was filled with guilt for his past indifference. He completely dedicated himself, body and soul, to the new baby, becoming its devoted caregiver. He started to raise the child as if he were the son of a wealthy man. He bought a go-cart, a yellow satin vest, and a gold-embroidered cap. He melted down his late wife’s jewelry to create gold bangles and anklets. He wouldn’t let the little child play with any neighborhood kids and became the child's only companion day and night. As the baby grew into a boy, he was so pampered and dressed in such luxury that the village children called him "Your Lordship" and teased him; while the older villagers thought Raicharan was inexplicably crazy about the child.

At last the time came for the boy to go to school. Raicharan sold his small piece of land, and went to Calcutta. There he got employment with great difficulty as a servant, and sent Phailna to school. He spared no pains to give him the best education, the best clothes, the best food. Meanwhile he lived himself on a mere handful of rice, and would say in secret: "Ah! my little Master, my dear little Master, you loved me so much that you came back to my house. You shall never suffer from any neglect of mine."

At last, the time came for the boy to start school. Raicharan sold his small piece of land and moved to Calcutta. There, he found a job as a servant with great difficulty and sent Phailna to school. He did everything he could to provide him with the best education, the best clothes, and the best food. Meanwhile, he lived on just a handful of rice and would quietly say, "Ah! my little Master, my dear little Master, you loved me so much that you came back to my house. You will never suffer from any neglect from me."

Twelve years passed away in this manner. The boy was able to read and write well. He was bright and healthy and good-looking. He paid a great deal of attention to his personal appearance, and was specially careful in parting his hair. He was inclined to extravagance and finery, and spent money freely. He could never quite look on Raicharan as a father, because, though fatherly in affection, he had the manner of a servant. A further fault was this, that Raicharan kept secret from every one that himself was the father of the child.

Twelve years went by like this. The boy could read and write well. He was smart, healthy, and good-looking. He paid a lot of attention to his appearance and was especially careful about how he parted his hair. He had a tendency for extravagance and fine clothes, spending money freely. He could never fully see Raicharan as a father because, although he was affectionate, he acted more like a servant. Another issue was that Raicharan kept it a secret from everyone that he was the boy's father.

The students of the hostel, where Phailna was a boarder, were greatly amused by Raicharan's country manners, and I have to confess that behind his father's back Phailna joined in their fun. But, in the bottom of their hearts, all the students loved the innocent and tender-hearted old man, and Phailna was very fond of him also. But, as I have said before, he loved him with a kind of condescension.

The students at the hostel where Phailna lived were really entertained by Raicharan's rural ways, and I have to admit that Phailna laughed along with them when his father wasn’t around. However, deep down, all the students cherished the innocent and kind-hearted old man, and Phailna had a special affection for him as well. But, as I mentioned earlier, his love came with a hint of superiority.

Raicharan grew older and older, and his employer was continually finding fault with him for his incompetent work. He had been starving himself for the boy's sake. So he had grown physically weak, and no longer up to his work. He would forget things, and his mind became dull and stupid. But his employer expected a full servant's work out of him, and would not brook excuses. The money that Raicharan had brought with him from the sale of his land was exhausted. The boy was continually grumbling about his clothes, and asking for more money.

Raicharan kept getting older, and his employer was always criticizing him for his poor work. He had been neglecting his own needs for the boy's sake, which left him physically weak and unable to perform his job well. He started to forget things, and his mind felt dull and slow. However, his employer expected him to work like a full servant and wouldn’t accept any excuses. The money Raicharan had brought from selling his land was all gone. The boy was always complaining about his clothes and asking for more money.

Raicharan made up his mind. He gave up the situation where he was working as a servant, and left some money with Phailna and said: "I have some business to do at home in my village, and shall be back soon."

Raicharan made a decision. He quit his job as a servant, left some money with Phailna, and said, "I have some business to take care of back home in my village, and I'll be back soon."

He went off at once to Baraset where Anukul was magistrate. Anukul's wife was still broken down with grief. She had had no other child.

He immediately went to Baraset where Anukul was the magistrate. Anukul's wife was still overwhelmed with grief. She had no other child.

One day Anukul was resting after a long and weary day in court. His wife was buying, at an exorbitant price, a herb from a mendicant quack, which was said to ensure the birth of a child. A voice of greeting was heard in the courtyard. Anukul went out to see who was there. It was Raicharan. Anukul's heart was softened when he saw his old servant. He asked him many questions, and offered to take him back into service.

One day, Anukul was relaxing after a long, tiring day in court. His wife was spending a ridiculous amount of money to buy a herb from a wandering fraud, claiming it would guarantee them a child. He heard someone greeting him in the courtyard and stepped outside to see who it was. It was Raicharan. Anukul felt a wave of warmth when he saw his old servant. He asked him a lot of questions and offered to hire him back.

Raicharan smiled faintly, and said in reply; "I want to make obeisance to my mistress."

Raicharan smiled slightly and replied, "I want to pay my respects to my mistress."

Anukul went with Raicharan into the house, where the mistress did not receive him as warmly as his old master. Raicharan took no notice of this, but folded his hands, and said: "It was not the Padma that stole your baby. It was I."

Anukul went with Raicharan into the house, where the lady didn't welcome him as warmly as his former master. Raicharan ignored this, folded his hands, and said: "It wasn't the Padma that took your baby. It was me."

Anukul exclaimed: "Great God! Eh! What! Where is he?" Raicharan replied: "He is with me, I will bring him the day after to-morrow."

Anukul shouted, "Oh my God! What! Where is he?" Raicharan answered, "He's with me. I'll bring him the day after tomorrow."

It was Sunday. There was no magistrate's court sitting. Both husband and wife were looking expectantly along the road, waiting from early morning for Raicharan's appearance. At ten o'clock he came, leading Phailna by the hand.

It was Sunday. There was no court in session. Both husband and wife were eagerly watching the road, waiting since early morning for Raicharan to show up. At ten o'clock, he arrived, holding Phailna's hand.

Anukul's wife, without a question, took the boy into her lap, and was wild with excitement, sometimes laughing, sometimes weeping, touching him, kissing his hair and his forehead, and gazing into his face with hungry, eager eyes. The boy was very good-looking and dressed like a gentleman's son. The heart of Anukul brimmed over with a sudden rush of affection.

Anukul's wife, without a doubt, took the boy in her arms and was overwhelmed with excitement, sometimes laughing, sometimes crying, touching him, kissing his hair and forehead, and gazing into his face with longing, eager eyes. The boy was really good-looking and dressed like a gentleman's son. Anukul's heart overflowed with a sudden surge of love.

Nevertheless the magistrate in him asked: "Have you any proofs?" Raicharan said: "How could there be any proof of such a deed? God alone knows that I stole your boy, and no one else in the world."

Nevertheless, the magistrate in him asked, "Do you have any proof?" Raicharan said, "How could there be proof of such an act? Only God knows that I took your boy, and no one else in the world."

When Anukul saw how eagerly his wife was clinging to the boy, he realised the futility of asking for proofs. It would be wiser to believe. And then—where could an old man like Raicharan get such a boy from? And why should his faithful servant deceive him for nothing?

When Anukul saw how eagerly his wife was holding onto the boy, he realized that asking for proof was pointless. It made more sense to just believe. And then—where would an old man like Raicharan get a boy like this? And why would his loyal servant deceive him for nothing?

"But," he added severely, "Raicharan, you must not stay here."

"But," he added seriously, "Raicharan, you can't stay here."

"Where shall I go, Master?" said Raicharan, in a choking voice, folding his hands; "I am old. Who will take in an old man as a servant?"

"Where should I go, Master?" Raicharan said, his voice trembling as he folded his hands. "I'm old. Who would want to hire an old man as a servant?"

The mistress said: "Let him stay. My child will be pleased. I forgive him."

The mistress said, "Let him stay. My child will be happy. I forgive him."

But Anukul's magisterial conscience would not allow him. "No," he said, "he cannot be forgiven for what he has done."

But Anukul's strong sense of justice wouldn't let him. "No," he said, "he can't be forgiven for what he's done."

Raicharan bowed to the ground, and clasped Anukul's feet. "Master," he cried, "let me stay. It was not I who did it. It was God."

Raicharan bowed down and clasped Anukul's feet. "Master," he exclaimed, "let me stay. I didn't do it. It was God."

Anukul's conscience was worse stricken than ever, when Raicharan tried to put the blame on God's shoulders.

Anukul's conscience was more troubled than ever when Raicharan tried to shift the blame onto God.

"No," he said, "I could not allow it. I cannot trust you any more. You have done an act of treachery."

"No," he said, "I can't allow that. I can't trust you anymore. You've committed an act of betrayal."

Raicharan rose to his feet and said: "It was not I who did it."

Raicharan stood up and said, "It wasn't me who did it."

"Who was it then?" asked Anukul.

"Who was it then?" Anukul asked.

Raicharan replied: "It was my fate."

Raicharan replied, "It was my fate."

But no educated man could take this for an excuse. Anukul remained obdurate.

But no educated person could use this as an excuse. Anukul stayed stubborn.

When Phailna saw that he was the wealthy magistrate's son, and not Raicharan's, he was angry at first, thinking that he had been cheated all this time of his birthright. But seeing Raicharan in distress, he generously said to his father: "Father, forgive him. Even if you don't let him live with us, let him have a small monthly pension."

When Phailna realized he was the wealthy magistrate's son and not Raicharan's, he felt angry at first, thinking he had been robbed of his birthright all along. But seeing Raicharan in distress, he generously said to his father: "Dad, forgive him. Even if you don't let him live with us, at least give him a small monthly allowance."

After hearing this, Raicharan did not utter another word. He looked for the last time on the face of his son; he made obeisance to his old master and mistress. Then he went out, and was mingled with the numberless people of the world.

After hearing this, Raicharan didn’t say another word. He took one last look at his son's face, paid his respects to his former master and mistress, then stepped outside and became just another face in the crowd.

At the end of the month Anukul sent him some money to his village. But the money came back. There was no one there of the name of Raicharan.

At the end of the month, Anukul sent some money to his village. But the money was returned. There was no one there by the name of Raicharan.





THE KINGDOM OF CARDS

I

Once upon a time there was a lonely island in a distant sea where lived the Kings and Queens, the Aces and the Knaves, in the Kingdom of Cards. The Tens and Nines, with the Twos and Threes, and all the other members, had long ago settled there also. But these were not twice-born people, like the famous Court Cards.

Once upon a time, there was a lonely island in a distant sea where the Kings and Queens, the Aces and the Knaves lived in the Kingdom of Cards. The Tens and Nines, along with the Twos and Threes, and all the other members, had settled there long ago too. But these weren’t twice-born people, like the famous Court Cards.

The Ace, the King, and the Knave were the three highest castes. The fourth Caste was made up of a mixture of the lower Cards. The Twos and Threes were lowest of all. These inferior Cards were never allowed to sit in the same row with the great Court Cards.

The Ace, the King, and the Knave were the three top ranks. The fourth rank consisted of a mix of the lower Cards. The Twos and Threes were the lowest of all. These lesser Cards were never allowed to sit in the same row as the prestigious Court Cards.

Wonderful indeed were the regulations and rules of that island kingdom. The particular rank of each individual had been settled from time immemorial. Every one had his own appointed work, and never did anything else. An unseen hand appeared to be directing them wherever they went,—according to the Rules.

The rules and regulations of that island kingdom were truly impressive. Each person's rank had been established for ages. Everyone had their assigned tasks and never did anything outside of that. It seemed like an invisible force was guiding them wherever they went, according to the Rules.

No one in the Kingdom of Cards had any occasion to think: no one had any need to come to any decision: no one was ever required to debate any new subject. The citizens all moved along in a listless groove without speech. When they fell, they made no noise. They lay down on their backs, and gazed upward at the sky with each prim feature firmly fixed for ever.

No one in the Kingdom of Cards had any reason to think: no one needed to make any decisions: no one was ever asked to discuss anything new. The citizens just went along in a dull routine without speaking. When they fell, they didn’t make a sound. They would lie on their backs, staring up at the sky with each stiff feature permanently set.

There was a remarkable stillness in the Kingdom of Cards. Satisfaction and contentment were complete in all their rounded wholeness. There was never any uproar or violence. There was never any excitement or enthusiasm.

There was an extraordinary calm in the Kingdom of Cards. Satisfaction and contentment were full and complete. There was never any chaos or violence. There was never any excitement or enthusiasm.

The great ocean, crooning its lullaby with one unceasing melody, lapped the island to sleep with a thousand soft touches of its wave's white hands. The vast sky, like the outspread azure wings of the brooding mother-bird, nestled the island round with its downy plume. For on the distant horizon a deep blue line betokened another shore. But no sound of quarrel or strife could reach the Island of Cards, to break its calm repose.

The great ocean, humming its lullaby with a constant tune, gently rocked the island to sleep with a thousand soft touches of its white-capped waves. The vast sky, like the sprawling blue wings of a protective mother bird, wrapped the island in its soft embrace. For on the distant horizon, a deep blue line signaled another shore. But no sound of conflict or strife could reach the Island of Cards, disrupting its peaceful calm.

II

II

In that far-off foreign land across the sea, there lived a young Prince whose mother was a sorrowing queen. This queen had fallen from favour, and was living with her only son on the seashore. The Prince passed his childhood alone and forlorn, sitting by his forlorn mother, weaving the net of his big desires. He longed to go in search of the Flying Horse, the Jewel in the Cobra's hood, the Rose of Heaven, the Magic Roads, or to find where the Princess Beauty was sleeping in the Ogre's castle over the thirteen rivers and across the seven seas.

In that distant foreign land across the sea, there lived a young Prince whose mother was a grieving queen. This queen had lost her status and was living with her only son by the seashore. The Prince spent his childhood feeling alone and sad, sitting by his sorrowful mother, dreaming big dreams. He longed to search for the Flying Horse, the Jewel in the Cobra's hood, the Rose of Heaven, the Magic Roads, or to find where Princess Beauty was sleeping in the Ogre's castle beyond the thirteen rivers and across the seven seas.

From the Son of the Merchant at school the young Prince learnt the stories of foreign kingdoms. From the Son of the Kotwal he learnt the adventures of the Two Genii of the Lamp. And when the rain came beating down, and the clouds covered the sky, he would sit on the threshold facing the sea, and say to his sorrowing mother: "Tell me, mother, a story of some very far-off land."

From the merchant’s son at school, the young prince learned stories about distant kingdoms. From the kotwal’s son, he heard the adventures of the two genies of the lamp. And when the rain poured down and clouds filled the sky, he would sit on the doorstep facing the sea and say to his sad mother, "Tell me, Mom, a story about a faraway land."

And his mother would tell him an endless tale she had heard in her childhood of a wonderful country beyond the sea where dwelt the Princess Beauty. And the heart of the young Prince would become sick with longing, as he sat on the threshold, looking out on the ocean, listening to his mother's wonderful story, while the rain outside came beating down and the grey clouds covered the sky.

And his mother would tell him an endless story she had heard in her childhood about a fantastic country across the sea where Princess Beauty lived. The young Prince's heart would ache with longing as he sat on the doorstep, gazing out at the ocean, listening to his mother's amazing tale while the rain poured down outside and the gray clouds filled the sky.

One day the Son of the Merchant came to the Prince, and said boldly: "Comrade, my studies are over. I am now setting out on my travels to seek my fortunes on the sea. I have come to bid you good-bye."

One day, the Merchant’s son went to the Prince and said confidently: "Hey, my studies are finished. I'm about to embark on my journey to find my fortune at sea. I came to say goodbye."

The Prince said; "I will go with you."

The Prince said, "I'm coming with you."

And the Son of Kotwal said also: "Comrades, trusty and true, you will not leave me behind. I also will be your companion."

And the Son of Kotwal said too: "Friends, loyal and trustworthy, you won't leave me behind. I will also be your companion."

Then the young Prince said to his sorrowing mother; "Mother, I am now setting out on my travels to seek my fortune. When I come back once more, I shall surely have found some way to remove all your sorrow."

Then the young Prince said to his grieving mother, "Mom, I'm heading out on my journey to find my fortune. When I return, I promise I'll have a way to take away all your sadness."

So the Three Companions set out on their travels together. In the harbour were anchored the twelve ships of the merchant, and the Three Companions got on board. The south wind was blowing, and the twelve ships sailed away, as fast as the desires which rose in the Prince's breast.

So the Three Companions started their journey together. In the harbor were the twelve ships of the merchant, and the Three Companions boarded one. The south wind was blowing, and the twelve ships took off, as quickly as the desires that arose in the Prince's heart.

At the Conch Shell Island they filled one ship with conchs. At the Sandal Wood Island they filled a second ship with sandal-wood, and at the Coral Island they filled a third ship with coral.

At Conch Shell Island, they filled one ship with conchs. At Sandal Wood Island, they filled a second ship with sandalwood, and at Coral Island, they filled a third ship with coral.

Four years passed away, and they filled four more ships, one with ivory, one with musk, one with cloves, and one with nutmegs.

Four years went by, and they loaded four more ships, one with ivory, one with musk, one with cloves, and one with nutmeg.

But when these ships were all loaded a terrible tempest arose. The ships were all of them sunk, with their cloves and nutmeg, and musk and ivory, and coral and sandal-wood and conchs. But the ship with the Three Companions struck on an island reef, buried them safe ashore, and itself broke in pieces.

But when all these ships were loaded, a terrible storm hit. All the ships sank along with their cloves and nutmeg, musk and ivory, coral and sandalwood, and conchs. However, the ship with the Three Companions crashed onto an island reef, safely depositing them on shore, but the ship itself broke apart.

This was the famous Island of Cards, where lived the Ace and King and Queen and Knave, with the Nines and Tens and all the other Members—according to the Rules.

This was the famous Island of Cards, where the Ace, King, Queen, and Knave lived, along with the Nines, Tens, and all the other Members—according to the Rules.

III

III

Up till now there had been nothing to disturb that island stillness. No new thing had ever happened. No discussion had ever been held.

Up until now, nothing had disturbed the calm of that island. Nothing new had ever happened. No conversations had ever taken place.

And then, of a sudden, the Three Companions appeared, thrown up by the sea,—and the Great Debate began. There were three main points of dispute.

And then, all of a sudden, the Three Companions showed up, tossed up by the sea,—and the Great Debate began. There were three main points of disagreement.

First, to what caste should these unclassed strangers belong? Should they rank with the Court Cards? Or were they merely lower-caste people, to be ranked with the Nines and Tens? No precedent could be quoted to decide this weighty question.

First, to which caste should these outcast strangers belong? Should they be ranked with the Court Cards? Or were they just lower-caste people, to be placed with the Nines and Tens? No precedent could be cited to settle this important question.

Secondly, what was their clan? Had they the fairer hue and bright complexion of the Hearts, or was theirs the darker complexion of the Clubs? Over this question there were interminable disputes. The whole marriage system of the island, with its intricate regulations, would depend on its nice adjustment.

Secondly, what was their clan? Did they have the lighter skin and bright complexion of the Hearts, or did they have the darker complexion of the Clubs? This question sparked endless debates. The entire marriage system of the island, with its complex rules, hinged on settling this matter.

Thirdly, what food should they take? With whom should they live and sleep? And should their heads be placed south-west, north-west, or only north-east? In all the Kingdom of Cards a series of problems so vital and critical had never been debated before.

Thirdly, what food should they eat? Who should they live and sleep with? And should their heads face south-west, north-west, or just north-east? In the entire Kingdom of Cards, a set of issues so important and urgent had never been discussed before.

But the Three Companions grew desperately hungry. They had to get food in some way or other. So while this debate went on, with its interminable silence and pauses, and while the Aces called their own meeting, and formed themselves into a Committee, to find some obsolete dealing with the question, the Three Companions themselves were eating all they could find, and drinking out of every vessel, and breaking all regulations.

But the Three Companions became incredibly hungry. They needed to find food somehow. While this debate dragged on, filled with endless silence and pauses, and while the Aces held their own meeting and formed a committee to look for some outdated solution to the problem, the Three Companions were eating everything they could find, drinking from every container, and ignoring all the rules.

Even the Twos and Threes were shocked at this outrageous behaviour. The Threes said; "Brother Twos, these people are openly shameless!" And the Twos said: "Brother Threes, they are evidently of lower caste than ourselves!" After their meal was over, the Three Companions went for a stroll in the city.

Even the Twos and Threes were shocked by this outrageous behavior. The Threes said, "Brother Twos, these people are completely shameless!" And the Twos replied, "Brother Threes, they are clearly of a lower caste than we are!" After finishing their meal, the Three Companions went for a walk in the city.

When they saw the ponderous people moving in their dismal processions with prim and solemn faces, then the Prince turned to the Son of the Merchant and the Son of the Kotwal, and threw back his head, and gave one stupendous laugh.

When they saw the heavy people moving in their gloomy processions with serious and solemn faces, the Prince turned to the Son of the Merchant and the Son of the Kotwal, threw back his head, and let out a huge laugh.

Down Royal Street and across Ace Square and along the Knave Embankment ran the quiver of this strange, unheard-of laughter, the laughter that, amazed at itself, expired in the vast vacuum of silence.

Down Royal Street and across Ace Square and along the Knave Embankment flowed the tremor of this odd, never-before-heard laughter, the laughter that, astonished by itself, faded away in the empty silence.

The Son of the Kotwal and the Son of the Merchant were chilled through to the bone by the ghost-like stillness around them. They turned to the Prince, and said: "Comrade, let us away. Let us not stop for a moment in this awful land of ghosts."

The Son of the Kotwal and the Son of the Merchant were cold to the core from the eerie stillness surrounding them. They looked at the Prince and said, "Friend, let's go. We shouldn't linger for a second in this terrifying land of spirits."

But the Prince said: "Comrades, these people resemble men, so I am going to find out, by shaking them upside down and outside in, whether they have a single drop of warm living blood left in their veins."

But the Prince said: "Friends, these people look like men, so I’m going to check, by turning them upside down and inside out, if they have even a drop of warm living blood left in their veins."

IV

IV

The days passed one by one, and the placid existence of the Island went on almost without a ripple. The Three Companions obeyed no rules nor regulations. They never did anything correctly either in sitting or standing or turning themselves round or lying on their back. On the contrary, wherever they saw these things going on precisely and exactly according to the Rules, they gave way to inordinate laughter. They remained unimpressed altogether by the eternal gravity of those eternal regulations.

The days went by one after another, and the calm life on the Island continued almost without interruption. The Three Companions followed no rules or regulations. They never did anything right, whether it was sitting, standing, turning around, or lying on their backs. Instead, whenever they saw others doing these things perfectly and strictly according to the Rules, they broke into uncontrollable laughter. They were completely unfazed by the serious nature of those everlasting regulations.

One day the great Court Cards came to the Son of the Kotwal and the Son of the Merchant and the Prince.

One day, the important Court Cards came to the Son of the Kotwal, the Son of the Merchant, and the Prince.

"Why," they asked slowly, "are you not moving according to the Rules?"

"Why," they asked slowly, "aren't you following the Rules?"

The Three Companions answered: "Because that is our Ichcha (wish)."

The Three Companions replied, "Because that's our wish."

The great Court Cards with hollow, cavernous voices, as if slowly awakening from an age-long dream, said together: "Ich-cha! And pray who is Ich-cha?"

The majestic Court Cards, with deep, echoing voices like they were just waking up from a long dream, said in unison: "Ich-cha! And who might Ich-cha be?"

They could not understand who Ichcha was then, but the whole island was to understand it by-and-by. The first glimmer of light passed the threshold of their minds when they found out, through watching the actions of the Prince, that they might move in a straight line in an opposite direction from the one in which they had always gone before. Then they made another startling discovery, that there was another side to the Cards which they had never yet noticed with attention. This was the beginning of the change.

They couldn’t understand who Ichcha was at that moment, but the whole island would come to understand it over time. The first hint of realization reached them when they noticed, by observing the Prince’s actions, that they could move in a straight line in a direction opposite to the one they had always taken. Then they made another surprising discovery: there was another side to the Cards that they had never really paid attention to. This was the start of the change.

Now that the change had begun, the Three Companions were able to initiate them more and more deeply into the mysteries of Ichcha. The Cards gradually became aware that life was not bound by regulations. They began to feel a secret satisfaction in the kingly power of choosing for themselves.

Now that the change had started, the Three Companions were able to draw them further into the mysteries of Ichcha. The Cards gradually realized that life wasn't restricted by rules. They began to feel a hidden satisfaction in the royal power of making their own choices.

But with this first impact of Ichcha the whole pack of cards began to totter slowly, and then tumble down to the ground. The scene was like that of some huge python awaking from a long sleep, as it slowly unfolds its numberless coils with a quiver that runs through its whole frame.

But with this first impact of Ichcha, the entire stack of cards started to wobble slowly and then fell to the ground. The scene resembled a giant python waking from a long sleep, slowly unfurling its countless coils with a shiver that coursed through its entire body.

V

V

Hitherto the Queens of Spades and Clubs and Diamonds and Hearts had remained behind curtains with eyes that gazed vacantly into space, or else remained fixed upon the ground.

So far, the Queens of Spades, Clubs, Diamonds, and Hearts had stayed behind curtains, their eyes staring blankly into space or fixed on the ground.

And now, all of a sudden, on an afternoon in spring the Queen of Hearts from the balcony raised her dark eyebrows for a moment, and cast a single glance upon the Prince from the corner of her eye.

And now, all of a sudden, on a spring afternoon, the Queen of Hearts raised her dark eyebrows from the balcony for a moment and glanced at the Prince out of the corner of her eye.

"Great God," cried the Prince, "I thought they were all painted images. But I am wrong. They are women after all."

"Wow," the Prince exclaimed, "I thought they were all just painted figures. But I was mistaken. They are actually women."

Then the young Prince called to his side his two Companions, and said in a meditative voice; "My comrades! There is a charm about these ladies that I never noticed before. When I saw that glance of the Queen's dark, luminous eyes, brightening with new emotion, it seemed to me like the first faint streak of dawn in a newly created world."

Then the young Prince summoned his two friends and said thoughtfully, "My buddies! There's something captivating about these women that I never saw before. When I caught that look in the Queen's dark, shining eyes, lighting up with new feelings, it felt like the first hint of dawn in a brand new world."

The two Companions smiled a knowing smile, and said: "Is that really so, Prince?"

The two friends exchanged a knowing smile and said, "Is that really true, Prince?"

And the poor Queen of Hearts from that day went from bad to worse. She began to forget all rules in a truly scandalous manner. If, for instance, her place in the row was beside the Knave, she suddenly found herself quite accidentally standing beside the Prince instead. At this, the Knave, with motionless face and solemn voice, would say: "Queen, you have made a mistake."

And the unfortunate Queen of Hearts went from bad to worse from that day on. She started to forget all the rules in a seriously outrageous way. For example, if her spot in the line was next to the Knave, she would suddenly find herself, quite by accident, standing next to the Prince instead. In response, the Knave, with a blank expression and serious tone, would say: "Queen, you've made a mistake."

And the poor Queen of Hearts' red cheeks would get redder than ever. But the Prince would come gallantly to her rescue and say: "No! There is no mistake. From to-day I am going to be Knave!"

And the poor Queen of Hearts' red cheeks would turn even redder. But the Prince would bravely come to her rescue and say, "No! There’s no mistake. From today on, I'm going to be Knave!"

Now it came to pass that, while every one was trying to correct the improprieties of the guilty Queen of Hearts, they began to make mistakes themselves. The Aces found themselves elbowed out by the Kings. The Kings got muddled up with the Knaves. The Nines and Tens assumed airs as though they belonged to the Great Court Cards. The Twos and Threes were found secretly taking the places specially resented for the Fours and Fives. Confusion had never been so confounded before.

Now, it happened that while everyone was trying to fix the mistakes of the guilty Queen of Hearts, they started making their own errors. The Aces found themselves pushed aside by the Kings. The Kings got mixed up with the Knaves. The Nines and Tens acted as if they belonged to the prestigious Court Cards. The Twos and Threes were caught secretly taking the spots meant for the Fours and Fives. Confusion had never been so chaotic before.

Many spring seasons had come and gone in that Island of Cards. The Kokil, the bird of Spring, had sung its song year after year. But it had never stirred the blood as it stirred it now. In days gone by the sea had sung its tireless melody. But, then, it had proclaimed only the inflexible monotony of the Rule. And suddenly its waves were telling, through all their flashing light and luminous shade and myriad voices, the deepest yearnings of the heart of love!

Many spring seasons had come and gone on that Island of Cards. The Kokil, the bird of Spring, had sung its song year after year. But it had never stirred the blood like it did now. In the past, the sea had sung its endless melody. But back then, it had only announced the rigid routine of the Rule. And suddenly, its waves were expressing, through all their flashing light and luminous shade and countless voices, the deepest desires of the heart of love!

VI

VI

Where are vanished now their prim, round, regular, complacent features? Here is a face full of love-sick longing. Here is a heart heating wild with regrets. Here is a mind racked sore with doubts. Music and sighing, and smiles and tears, are filling the air. Life is throbbing; hearts are breaking; passions are kindling.

Where have their neat, round, even, self-satisfied features gone? Here is a face full of love-struck yearning. Here is a heart burning intensely with regrets. Here is a mind tortured by doubts. Music and sighs, smiles and tears, fill the air. Life is pulsing; hearts are breaking; passions are igniting.

Every one is now thinking of his own appearance, and comparing himself with others. The Ace of Clubs is musing to himself, that the King of Spades may be just passably good-looking. "But," says he, "when I walk down the street you have only to see how people's eyes turn towards me." The King of Spades is saying; "Why on earth is that Ace of Clubs always straining his neck and strutting about like a peacock? He imagines all the Queens are dying of love for him, while the real fact is—" Here he pauses, and examines his face in the glass.

Everyone is now focused on their own appearance, comparing themselves to others. The Ace of Clubs is thinking to himself that the King of Spades might be somewhat attractive. "But," he says, "when I walk down the street, you only have to see how people's eyes turn towards me." The King of Spades wonders, "Why is that Ace of Clubs always stretching his neck and strutting around like a peacock? He thinks all the Queens are swooning over him, while the truth is—" Here, he stops and checks his reflection in the mirror.

But the Queens were the worst of all. They began to spend all their time in dressing themselves up to the Nines. And the Nines would become their hopeless and abject slaves. But their cutting remarks about one another were more shocking still.

But the Queens were the worst of all. They started to spend all their time getting dressed to the nines. And the nines would become their hopeless and miserable slaves. But their sharp comments about each other were even more shocking.

So the young men would sit listless on the leaves under the trees, lolling with outstretched limbs in the forest shade. And the young maidens, dressed in pale-blue robes, would come walking accidentally to the same shade of the same forest by the same trees, and turn their eyes as though they saw no one there, and look as though they came out to see nothing at all. And then one young man more forward than the rest in a fit of madness would dare to go near to a maiden in blue. But, as he drew near, speech would forsake him. He would stand there tongue-tied and foolish, and the favourable moment would pass.

So the young men would sit around on the leaves under the trees, lounging with their limbs stretched out in the shade of the forest. And the young women, wearing light blue dresses, would happen to walk into the same shade of the same forest by the same trees, pretending not to notice the guys there, as if they came out just to enjoy the surroundings. Then one young man, a bit bolder than the others, would impulsively approach a girl in blue. But as he got closer, he would lose his ability to speak. He would stand there, tongue-tied and awkward, and the perfect moment would slip away.

The Kokil birds were singing in the boughs overhead. The mischievous South wind was blowing; it disarrayed the hair, it whispered in the ear, and stirred the music in the blood. The leaves of the trees were murmuring with rustling delight. And the ceaseless sound of the ocean made all the mute longings of the heart of man and maid surge backwards and forwards on the full springtide of love.

The Kokil birds were singing in the branches above. The playful south wind was blowing; it tousled hair, whispered in ears, and stirred the music in the blood. The leaves of the trees were softly rustling with joy. And the constant sound of the ocean made all the unspoken longings of both men and women ebb and flow with the full tides of love.

The Three Companions had brought into the dried-up channels of the Kingdom of Cards the full flood-tide of a new life.

The Three Companions had brought a rush of new life into the parched channels of the Kingdom of Cards.

VII

VII

And, though the tide was full, there-was a pause as though the rising waters would not break into foam but remain suspended for ever. There were no outspoken words, only a cautious going forward one step and receding two. All seemed busy heaping up their unfulfilled desires like castles in the air, or fortresses of sand. They were pale and speechless, their eyes were burning, their lips trembling with unspoken secrets.

And even though the tide was high, there was a moment when it felt like the rising water wouldn’t crash into foam but would stay frozen forever. No one said much; it was more about taking one step forward and two steps back. Everyone seemed preoccupied with stacking up their unfulfilled wishes like castles in the air or sandcastles. They looked pale and silent, their eyes burning, their lips shaking with unsaid secrets.

The Prince saw what was wrong. He summoned every one on the Island and said: "Bring hither the flutes and the cymbals, the pipes and drums. Let all be played together, and raise loud shouts of rejoicing. For the Queen of Hearts this very night is going to choose her Mate!"

The Prince noticed what was wrong. He called everyone on the Island and said: "Bring the flutes and cymbals, the pipes and drums. Let's play them all together and raise loud cheers of celebration. Because the Queen of Hearts is going to choose her Mate tonight!"

So the Tens and Nines began to blow on their flutes and pipes; the Eights and Sevens played on their sackbuts and viols; and even the Twos and Threes began to beat madly on their drums.

So the Tens and Nines started playing their flutes and pipes; the Eights and Sevens played their sackbuts and viols; and even the Twos and Threes began banging wildly on their drums.

When this tumultous gust of music came, it swept away at one blast all those sighings and mopings. And then what a torrent of laughter and words poured forth! There were daring proposals and locking refusals, and gossip and chatter, and jests and merriment. It was like the swaying and shaking, and rustling and soughing, in a summer gale, of a million leaves and branches in the depth of the primeval forest.

When this intense burst of music hit, it blew away all the sighs and sadness in one go. And then, what an outpouring of laughter and chatter came! There were bold suggestions and locked refusals, along with gossip, talk, jokes, and fun. It was like the swaying and rustling of countless leaves and branches in the heart of an ancient forest during a summer breeze.

But the Queen of Hearts, in a rose-red robe, sat silent in the shadow of her secret bower, and listened to the great uproarious sound of music and mirth, that came floating towards her. She shut her eyes, and dreamt her dream of lore. And when she opened them she found the Prince seated on the ground before her gazing up at her face. And she covered her eyes with both hands, and shrank back quivering with an inward tumult of joy.

But the Queen of Hearts, in a bright red robe, sat quietly in the shadows of her hidden garden, listening to the loud sounds of music and laughter that floated her way. She closed her eyes and dreamed her dream of wisdom. When she opened them, she saw the Prince sitting on the ground in front of her, gazing up at her face. She covered her eyes with both hands and shrank back, trembling with a rush of joy inside.

And the Prince passed the whole day alone, walking by the side of the surging sea. He carried in his mind that startled look, that shrinking gesture of the Queen, and his heart beat high with hope.

And the Prince spent the entire day alone, walking along the crashing waves. He couldn't shake the image of the Queen's startled expression and her hesitant gesture, and his heart raced with hope.

That night the serried, gaily-dressed ranks of young men and maidens waited with smiling faces at the Palace Gates. The Palace Hall was lighted with fairy lamps and festooned with the flowers of spring. Slowly the Queen of Hearts entered, and the whole assembly rose to greet her. With a jasmine garland in her hand, she stood before the Prince with downcast eyes. In her lowly bashfulness she could hardly raise the garland to the neck of the Mate she had chosen. But the Prince bowed his head, and the garland slipped to its place. The assembly of youths and maidens had waited her choice with eager, expectant hush. And when the choice was made, the whole vast concourse rocked and swayed with a tumult of wild delight. And the sound of their shouts was heard in every part of the island, and by ships far out at sea. Never had such a shout been raised in the Kingdom of Cards before.

That night, the rows of young men and women, all dressed up, waited with smiles at the Palace Gates. The Palace Hall was lit with fairy lights and decorated with spring flowers. Slowly, the Queen of Hearts entered, and the entire crowd stood up to welcome her. With a jasmine garland in her hand, she stood before the Prince, her eyes cast down. In her shy humility, she could barely lift the garland to place it around the neck of the man she had chosen. But the Prince lowered his head, and the garland fell into place. The gathering of young people had waited for her decision in eager silence. And when she made her choice, the massive crowd erupted into a frenzy of joy. The sound of their cheers echoed throughout the island and could be heard by ships far out at sea. Never before had such a cheer been heard in the Kingdom of Cards.

And they carried the Prince and his Bride, and seated them on the throne, and crowned them then and there in the Ancient Island of Cards.

And they carried the Prince and his Bride, sat them on the throne, and crowned them right then and there in the Ancient Island of Cards.

And the sorrowing Mother Queen, on the 'far-off island shore on the other side of the sea, came sailing to her son's new kingdom in a ship adorned with gold.

And the grieving Mother Queen, on the distant island shore across the sea, sailed to her son's new kingdom in a ship decorated with gold.

And the citizens are no longer regulated according to the Rules, but are good or bad, or both, according to their Ichcha.

And the citizens are no longer governed by the Rules, but are considered good or bad, or both, based on their desires.





THE DEVOTEE

At a time, when my unpopularity with a part of my readers had reached the nadir of its glory, and my name had become the central orb of the journals, to be attended through space with a perpetual rotation of revilement, I felt the necessity to retire to some quiet place and endeavour to forget my own existence.

At a time when my unpopularity with some of my readers had hit rock bottom, and my name had become the main topic of the newspapers, surrounded by a constant stream of insults, I felt the need to escape to a quiet place and try to forget that I even existed.

I have a house in the country some miles away from Calcutta, where I can remain unknown and unmolested. The villagers there have not, as yet, come to any conclusion about me. They know I am no mere holiday-maker or pleasure-seeker; for I never outrage the silence of the village nights with the riotous noises of the city. Nor do they regard me as ascetic, because the little acquaintance they have of me carries the savour of comfort about it. I am not, to them, a traveller; for, though I am a vagabond by nature, my wandering through the village fields is aimless. They are hardly even quite certain whether I am married or single; for they have never seen me with my children. So, not being able to classify me in any animal or vegetable kingdom that they know, they have long since given me up and left me stolidly alone.

I have a house in the countryside a few miles from Calcutta, where I can stay unknown and undisturbed. The villagers haven’t figured me out yet. They know I’m not just a vacationer or someone looking for fun; I never disrupt the quiet of the village nights with loud city noises. They don’t see me as a recluse either, because the little they know about me gives off a vibe of comfort. To them, I’m not a tourist; even though I’m naturally a wanderer, my strolls through the village fields don’t have any purpose. They aren’t even sure if I’m married or single because they’ve never seen me with my kids. So, since they can’t place me in any category they understand, they’ve long since given up and left me alone.

But quite lately I have come to know that there is one person in the village who is deeply interested in me. Our acquaintance began on a sultry afternoon in July. There had been rain all the morning, and the air was still wet and heavy with mist, like eyelids when weeping is over.

But recently I found out that there’s one person in the village who is really interested in me. We got to know each other on a hot afternoon in July. It had rained all morning, and the air was still damp and thick with mist, like eyelids after crying.

I sat lazily watching a dappled cow grazing on the high bank of the river. The afternoon sun was playing on her glossy hide. The simple beauty of this dress of light made me wonder idly at man's deliberate waste of money in setting up tailors' shops to deprive his own skin of its natural clothing.

I sat back, lazily watching a spotted cow grazing on the riverbank. The afternoon sun danced on her shiny coat. The simple beauty of this play of light made me ponder how people waste money by opening tailor shops to cover up their skin's natural clothing.

While I was thus watching and lazily musing, a woman of middle age came and prostrated herself before me, touching the ground with her forehead. She carried in her robe some bunches of flowers, one of which she offered to me with folded hands. She said to me, as she offered it: "This is an offering to my God."

While I was watching and daydreaming, a middle-aged woman came and bowed down in front of me, touching her forehead to the ground. She had some bunches of flowers in her robe, and she offered one to me with her hands together. She said to me as she gave it: "This is an offering to my God."

She went away. I was so taken aback as she uttered these words, that I could hardly catch a glimpse of her before she was gone. The whole incident was entirely simple, but it left a deep impression on my mind; and as I turned back once more to look at the cattle in the field, the zest of life in the cow, who was munching the lush grass with deep breaths, while she whisked off the flies, appeared to me fraught with mystery. My readers may laugh at my foolishness, but my heart was full of adoration. I offered my worship to the pure joy of living, which is God's own life. Then, plucking a tender shoot from the mango tree, I fed the cow with it from my own hand, and as I did this I had the satisfaction of having pleased my God.

She walked away. I was so surprised when she said that, I could barely catch a glimpse of her before she disappeared. The whole thing was really simple, but it left a lasting impression on me; and as I turned back to look at the cattle in the field, the sense of life in the cow, who was munching on the fresh grass and breathing deeply while swatting away the flies, seemed full of mystery. My readers might find my feelings silly, but my heart was overflowing with admiration. I offered my gratitude to the pure joy of living, which is God's own essence. Then, picking a tender shoot from the mango tree, I fed the cow with it from my own hand, and in doing so, I felt the satisfaction of having pleased my God.

The next year when I returned to the village it was February. The cold season still lingered on. The morning sun came into my room, and I was grateful for its warmth. I was writing, when the servant came to tell me that a devotee, of the Vishnu cult, wanted to see me. I told him, in an absent way, to bring her upstairs, and went on with my writing. The Devotee came in, and bowed to me, touching my feet. I found that she was the same woman whom I had met, for a brief moment, a year ago.

The next year when I returned to the village, it was February. The cold season was still hanging around. The morning sun streamed into my room, and I was thankful for its warmth. I was writing when the servant came to tell me that a devotee of the Vishnu cult wanted to see me. I told him, somewhat distractedly, to bring her upstairs and continued my writing. The devotee came in and bowed to me, touching my feet. I realized that she was the same woman I had met, even if just briefly, a year ago.

I was able now to examine her more closely. She was past that age when one asks the question whether a woman is beautiful or not. Her stature was above the ordinary height, and she was strongly built; but her body was slightly bent owing to her constant attitude of veneration. Her manner had nothing shrinking about it. The most remarkable of her features were her two eyes. They seemed to have a penetrating power which could make distance near.

I was now able to look at her more closely. She was beyond the age when one questions whether a woman is beautiful or not. She was taller than average and had a strong build, but her body was slightly hunched due to her constant posture of reverence. Her demeanor was not timid at all. The most striking of her features were her two eyes. They seemed to have a powerful gaze that could make distances feel closer.

With those two large eyes of hers, she seemed to push me as she entered.

With her two big eyes, she seemed to nudge me as she walked in.

"What is this?" she asked. "Why have you brought me here before your throne, my God? I used to see you among the trees; and that was much better. That was the true place to meet you."

"What is this?" she asked. "Why have you brought me here before your throne, my God? I used to see you among the trees, and that was so much better. That was the real place to meet you."

She must have seen me walking in the garden without my seeing her. For the last few clays, however, I had suffered from a cold, and had been prevented from going out. I had, perforce, to stay indoors and pay my homage to the evening sky from my terrace. After a silent pause the Devotee said to me: "O my God, give me some words of good."

She must have seen me walking in the garden without me noticing her. For the last few days, though, I had a cold and couldn't go outside. I had to stay indoors and admire the evening sky from my terrace. After a quiet moment, the Devotee said to me, "Oh my God, give me some inspiring words."

I was quite unprepared for this abrupt request, and answered her on the spur of the moment: "Good words I neither give nor receive. I simply open my eyes and keep silence, and then I can at once both hear and see, even when no sound is uttered. Now, while I am looking at you, it is as good as listening to your voice."

I was totally caught off guard by this sudden request, and I replied on impulse: "I don’t give or expect kind words. I just open my eyes and stay quiet, and then I can instantly hear and see, even when no words are spoken. Right now, as I’m looking at you, it’s pretty much the same as listening to your voice."

The Devotee became quite excited as I spoke, and exclaimed: "God speaks to me, not only with His mouth, but with His whole body."

The Devotee got really excited as I spoke and exclaimed, "God communicates with me, not just with His words, but with His entire being."

I said to her: "When I am silent I can listen with my whole body. I have come away from Calcutta here to listen to that sound."

I said to her, "When I'm quiet, I can listen with my entire being. I came all the way from Calcutta to hear that sound."

The Devotee said: "Yes, I know that, and therefore I have come here to sit by you."

The Devotee said: "Yeah, I know that, and that's why I've come here to be with you."

Before taking her leave, she again bowed to me, and touched my feet. I could see that she was distressed, because my feet were covered. She wished them to be bare.

Before she left, she bowed to me again and touched my feet. I could tell she was upset because my feet were covered. She wanted them to be bare.

Early next morning I came out, and sat on my terrace on the roof. Beyond the line of trees southward I could see the open country chill and desolate. I could watch the sun rising over the sugar-cane in the East, beyond the clump of trees at the side of the village. Out of the deep shadow of those dark trees the village road suddenly appeared. It stretched forward, winding its way to some distant villages on the horizon, till it was lost in the grey of the mist.

Early the next morning, I came out and sat on my rooftop terrace. Beyond the row of trees to the south, I could see the open countryside, cold and barren. I watched the sun rising over the sugarcane in the east, past the cluster of trees by the village. From the deep shadows of those dark trees, the village road suddenly emerged. It stretched ahead, winding its way toward some distant villages on the horizon, until it disappeared into the grey mist.

That morning it was difficult to say whether the sun had risen or not. A white fog was still clinging to the tops of the trees. I saw the Devotee walking through the blurred dawn, like a mist-wraith of the morning twilight. She was singing her chant to God, and sounding her cymbals.

That morning, it was hard to tell if the sun had come up. A white fog was still hanging over the tops of the trees. I watched the Devotee walking through the hazy dawn, like a ghost of the morning twilight. She was singing her chant to God and ringing her cymbals.

The thick haze lifted at last; and the sun, like the kindly grandsire of the village, took his seat amid all the work that was going on in home and field.

The thick haze finally lifted, and the sun, like a warm grandfather of the village, took his place among all the activities happening in homes and fields.

When I had just settled down at my writing-table, to appease the hungry appetite of my editor in Calcutta, there came a sound of footsteps on the stair, and the Devotee, humming a tune to herself, entered, and bowed before me. I lifted my head from my papers.

When I had just sat down at my writing desk to satisfy my editor in Calcutta, I heard footsteps on the stairs, and the Devotee, humming a tune to herself, walked in and bowed to me. I lifted my head from my papers.

She said to me: "My God, yesterday I took as sacred food what was left over from your meal."

She said to me, "Oh my God, yesterday I treated the leftovers from your meal like they were sacred food."

I was startled, and asked her how she could do that.

I was shocked and asked her how she could do that.

"Oh," she said, "I waited at your door in the evening, while you were at dinner, and took some food from your plate when it was carried out."

"Oh," she said, "I waited at your door in the evening while you were having dinner, and I took some food from your plate when it was served."

This was a surprise to me, for every one in the village knew that I had been to Europe, and had eaten with Europeans. I was a vegetarian, no doubt, but the sanctity of my cook would not bear investigation, and the orthodox regarded my food as polluted.

This surprised me because everyone in the village knew I had been to Europe and had eaten with Europeans. I was definitely a vegetarian, but the purity of my cook couldn’t stand up to scrutiny, and the traditionalists considered my food to be contaminated.

The Devotee, noticing my sign of surprise, said: "My God, why should I come to you at all, if I could not take your food?"

The Devotee, seeing my look of surprise, said: "What honestly would make me come to you at all if I couldn't have your food?"

I asked her what her own caste people would say. She told me she had already spread the news far and wide all over the village. The caste people had shaken their heads, but agreed that she must go her own way.

I asked her what her own caste would think. She told me she had already shared the news all around the village. The people in her caste had shaken their heads but agreed that she should do what she wanted.

I found out that the Devotee came from a good family in the country, and that her mother was well to-do, and desired to keep her daughter. But she preferred to be a mendicant. I asked her how she made her living. She told me that her followers had given her a piece of land, and that she begged her food from door to door. She said to me: "The food which I get by begging is divine."

I learned that the Devotee came from a respectable family in the countryside, and that her mother was well-off and wanted to keep her daughter. However, she chose to live as a mendicant. I asked her how she supported herself. She explained that her followers had given her a piece of land, and that she begged for her food from house to house. She told me, "The food I receive by begging is divine."

After I had thought over what she said, I understood her meaning. When we get our food precariously as alms, we remember God the giver. But when we receive our food regularly at home, as a matter of course, we are apt to regard it as ours by right.

After thinking about what she said, I got her point. When we get our food uncertainly as charity, we remember God, the giver. But when we receive our food regularly at home, as if it's expected, we tend to see it as something we deserve.

I had a great desire to ask her about her husband. But as she never mentioned him even indirectly, I did not question her.

I really wanted to ask her about her husband. But since she never brought him up, not even in passing, I didn’t ask her.

I found out very soon that the Devotee had no respect at all for that part of the village where the people of the higher castes lived.

I quickly realized that the Devotee had no respect whatsoever for the part of the village where the higher-caste people lived.

"They never give," she said, "a single farthing to God's service; and yet they have the largest share of God's glebe. But the poor worship and starve."

"They never give," she said, "a single cent to God's work; and yet they have the biggest portion of God's land. But the poor pray and go hungry."

I asked her why she did not go and live among these godless people, and help them towards a better life. "That," I said with some unction, "would be the highest form of divine worship."

I asked her why she didn't go live among those godless people and help them live better lives. "That," I said earnestly, "would be the greatest form of worship."

I had heard sermons of this kind from time to time, and I am rather fond of copying them myself for the public benefit, when the chance comes.

I had heard sermons like this occasionally, and I quite enjoy transcribing them myself for the benefit of others whenever I get the chance.

But the Devotee was not at all impressed. She raised her big round eyes, and looked straight into mine, and said:

But the Devotee wasn’t impressed at all. She raised her big round eyes and looked straight into mine, and said:

"You mean to say that because God is with the sinners, therefore when you do them any service you do it to God? Is that so?"

"You’re saying that because God is with sinners, when you help them, you’re actually helping God? Is that right?"

"Yes," I replied, "that is my meaning."

"Yeah," I said, "that's what I mean."

"Of course," she answered almost impatiently, "of course, God is with them: otherwise, how could they go on living at all? But what is that to me? My God is not there. My God cannot be worshipped among them; because I do not find Him there. I seek Him where I can find Him."

"Of course," she replied, a little impatiently, "of course, God is with them; otherwise, how could they keep going at all? But what does that have to do with me? My God isn't there. I can't worship Him among them because I don’t find Him there. I look for Him where I can actually find Him."

As she spoke, she made obeisance to me. What she meant to say was really this. A mere doctrine of God's omnipresence does not help us. That God is all-pervading,—this truth may be a mere intangible abstraction, and therefore unreal to ourselves. Where I can see Him, there is His reality in my soul.

As she talked, she showed me respect. What she really meant was this: just believing in God's omnipresence doesn't do much for us. The idea that God is everywhere can feel like a vague concept, making it seem unreal to us. I can feel His reality in my soul where I can see Him.

I need not explain that all the while she showered her devotion on me she did it to me not as an individual. I was simply a vehicle of her divine worship. It was not for me either to receive it or to refuse it: for it was not mine, but God's.

I don’t have to explain that while she showed her devotion to me, she didn't see me as an individual. I was just a means for her to express her worship. It wasn’t up to me to accept it or decline it because it wasn’t mine; it belonged to God.

When the Devotee came again, she found me once more engaged with my books and papers.

When the Devotee returned, she found me once again absorbed in my books and papers.

"What have you been doing," she said, with evident vexation, "that my God should make you undertake such drudgery? Whenever I come, I find you reading and writing."

"What have you been up to," she said, clearly irritated, "that my God would make you do such boring work? Every time I come by, I find you reading and writing."

"God keeps his useless people busy," I answered; "otherwise they would be bound to get into mischief. They have to do all the least necessary things in life. It keeps them out of trouble."

"God keeps his pointless people occupied," I replied; "otherwise they would inevitably cause trouble. They have to handle all the least important tasks in life. It keeps them out of trouble."

The Devotee told me that she could not bear the encumbrances, with which, day by day, I was surrounded. If she wanted to see me, she was not allowed by the servants to come straight upstairs. If she wanted to touch my feet in worship, there were my socks always in the way. And when she wanted to have a simple talk with me, she found my mind lost in a wilderness of letters.

The devotee told me that she couldn't stand the burdens I was surrounded by every day. If she wanted to see me, the servants wouldn't let her come straight upstairs. If she wanted to touch my feet in worship, my socks were always in the way. And when she wanted to have a simple conversation with me, she found my mind lost in a sea of letters.

This time, before she left me, she folded her hands, and said: "My God! I felt your feet in my breast this morning. Oh, how cool! And they were bare, not covered. I held them upon my head for a long time in worship. That filled my very being. Then, after that, pray what was the use of my coming to you yourself? Why did I come? My Lord, tell me truly,—wasn't it a mere infatuation?"

This time, before she left me, she folded her hands and said, "Oh my God! I felt your feet in my heart this morning. They were so cool! And they were bare, not covered. I held them on my head for a long time in worship. That filled my whole being. So, after that, what was the point of coming to you in the first place? Why did I come? My Lord, please tell me honestly—wasn't it just a silly crush?"

There were some flowers in my vase on the table. While she was there, the gardener brought some new flowers to put in their place. The Devotee saw him changing them.

There were some flowers in my vase on the table. While she was there, the gardener brought some new flowers to replace them. The Devotee saw him changing them.

"Is that all?" she exclaimed. "Have you done with the flowers? Then give them to me."

"Is that it?" she exclaimed. "Are you done with the flowers? Then hand them over to me."

She held the flowers tenderly in the cup of her hands, and began to gaze at them with bent head. After a few moments' silence she raised her head again, and said to me: "You never look at these flowers; therefore they become stale to you. If you would only look into them, then your reading and writing would go to the winds."

She held the flowers gently in her hands and started to look at them with her head down. After a moment of silence, she lifted her head and said to me, "You never pay attention to these flowers; that's why they seem dull to you. If you would just really look at them, all your reading and writing would seem unimportant."

She tied the flowers together in the end of her robe, and placed them, in an attitude of worship, on the top of her head, saying reverently: "Let me carry my God with me."

She tied the flowers together at the end of her robe and placed them, in a gesture of worship, on top of her head, saying reverently, "Let me carry my God with me."

While she did this, I felt that flowers in our rooms do not receive their due meed of loving care at our hands. When we stick them in vases, they are more like a row of naughty schoolboys standing on a form to be punished.

While she did this, I felt that the flowers in our rooms don’t get the love and care they deserve from us. When we put them in vases, they look more like a row of misbehaving schoolboys standing on a bench waiting to be punished.

The Devotee came again the same evening, and sat by my feet on the terrace of the roof.

The Devotee came back that same evening and sat by my feet on the rooftop terrace.

"I gave away those flowers," she said, "as I went from house to house this morning, singing God's name. Beni, the head man of our village, laughed at me for my devotion, and said: 'Why do you waste all this devotion on Him? Don't you know He is reviled up and down the countryside?' Is that true, my God? Is it true that they are hard upon you?"

"I gave away those flowers," she said, "as I walked from house to house this morning, singing God's name. Beni, the village chief, laughed at me for my devotion and said, 'Why do you waste all this devotion on Him? Don’t you know He’s scorned all over the countryside?' Is that true, my God? Is it true that they treat you badly?"

For a moment I shrank into myself. It was a shock to find that the stains of printers' ink could reach so far.

For a moment, I withdrew into myself. It was shocking to realize that the stains from printer's ink could spread so far.

The Devotee went on: "Beni imagined that he could blow out the flame of my devotion at one breath! But this is no mere tiny flame: it is a burning fire. Why do they abuse you, my God?"

The Devotee continued: "Beni thought he could extinguish the flame of my devotion with a single breath! But this is no small flame: it’s a raging fire. Why do they insult you, my God?"

I said: "Because I deserved it. I suppose in my greed I was loitering about to steal people's hearts in secret."

I said, "Because I earned it. I guess in my greed I was hanging around to secretly steal people's hearts."

The Devotee said: "Now you see for yourself how little their hearts are worth. They are full of poison, and this will cure you of your greed."

The Devotee said: "Now you can see for yourself how little their hearts are worth. They are filled with poison, and this will help you get over your greed."

"When a man," I answered, "has greed in his heart, he is always on the verge of being beaten. The greed itself supplies his enemies with poison."

"When a man," I replied, "has greed in his heart, he's always close to being defeated. That greed itself gives his enemies an advantage."

"Our merciful God," she replied, "beats us with His own hand, and drives away all the poison. He who endures God's beating to the end is saved."

"Our merciful God," she replied, "punishes us with His own hand and removes all the poison. Those who withstand God's punishment until the end are saved."

II.

II.

That evening the Devotee told me the story of her life. The stars of evening rose and set behind the trees, as she went on to the end of her tale.

That evening, the Devotee shared her life story with me. The evening stars rose and fell behind the trees as she continued until she finished her tale.

"My husband is very simple. Some people think that he is a simpleton; but I know that those who understand simply, understand truly. In business and household management he was able to hold his own. Because his needs were small, and his wants few, he could manage carefully on what we had. He would never meddle in other matters, nor try to understand them.

"My husband is very straightforward. Some people think he’s foolish, but I believe that those who truly understand see him for who he is. In business and managing our household, he was capable and competent. Since his needs were minimal and his desires few, he managed our resources carefully. He would never interfere in other matters or try to grasp things beyond his understanding."

"Both my husband's parents died before we had been married long, and we were left alone. But my husband always needed some one to be over him. I am ashamed to confess that he had a sort of reverence for me, and looked upon me as his superior. But I am sure that he could understand things better than I, though I had greater powers of talking.

"Both my husband's parents passed away shortly after we got married, leaving us on our own. But my husband always needed someone to guide him. I'm embarrassed to admit that he had a kind of respect for me and viewed me as his superior. However, I know he understood things better than I did, even though I was more skilled at talking."

"Of all the people in the world he held his Guru Thakur (spiritual master) in the highest veneration. Indeed it was not veneration merely but love; and such love as his is rare.

Of all the people in the world, he held his Guru Thakur (spiritual master) in the highest regard. It wasn't just respect; it was love, and that kind of love is truly rare.

"Guru Thakur was younger than my husband. Oh! how beautiful he was!

"Guru Thakur was younger than my husband. Oh! how beautiful he was!"

"My husband had played games with him when he was a boy; and from that time forward he had dedicated his heart and soul to this friend of his early days. Thakur knew how simple my husband was, and used to tease him mercilessly.

"My husband had played games with him when they were kids, and from that time on, he dedicated his heart and soul to this friend from his early days. Thakur knew how straightforward my husband was and used to tease him relentlessly."

"He and his comrades would play jokes upon him for their own amusement; but he would bear them all with longsuffering.

"He and his friends would play pranks on him for their own enjoyment; but he would tolerate them all patiently."

"When I married into this family, Guru Thakur was studying at Benares. My husband used to pay all his expenses. I was eighteen years old when he returned home to our village.

"When I married into this family, Guru Thakur was studying in Benares. My husband covered all his expenses. I was eighteen when he came back home to our village."

"At the age of fifteen I had my child. I was so young I did not know how to take care of him. I was fond of gossip, and liked to be with my village friends for hours together. I used to get quite cross with my boy when I was compelled to stay at home and nurse him. Alas! my child-God came into my life, but His playthings were not ready for Him. He came to the mother's heart, but the mother's heart lagged behind. He left me in anger; and ever since I have been searching for Him up and down the world.

"At fifteen, I had my child. I was so young that I didn't know how to take care of him. I loved gossip and spent hours hanging out with my friends from the village. I would get really frustrated with my son when I had to stay home and take care of him. Unfortunately, my child came into my life, but I wasn't prepared for him. He came to my heart, but I wasn't ready for him. He left me upset, and ever since, I've been searching for him everywhere."

"The boy was the joy of his father's life. My careless neglect used to pain my husband. But his was a mute soul. He has never been able to give expression to his pain.

"The boy was the joy of his father's life. My careless neglect used to hurt my husband. But he was a quiet man. He has never been able to express his pain."

"The wonderful thing was this, that in spite of my neglect the child used to love me more than any one else. He seemed to have the dread that I would one day go away and leave him. So even when I was with him, he would watch me with a restless look in his eyes. He had me very little to himself, and therefore his desire to be with me was always painfully eager. When I went each day to the river, he used to fret and stretch out his little arms to be taken with me. But the bathing ghal was my place for meeting my friends, and I did not care to burden myself with the child.

The amazing thing was this: even with my neglect, the child loved me more than anyone else. He seemed to fear that I would one day leave him. So even when I was with him, he would watch me anxiously. He had so little of me, which made his longing to be with me always painfully intense. Each day when I went to the river, he would get upset and reach out his little arms to be taken along with me. But the bathing ghal was my spot for meeting friends, and I didn’t want to be burdened with the child.

"It was an early morning in August. Fold after fold of grey clouds had wrapped the mid-day round with a wet clinging robe. I asked the maid to take care of the boy, while I went down to the river. The child cried after me as I went away.

"It was an early morning in August. Layers of grey clouds had wrapped the midday sky in a damp, clingy blanket. I asked the maid to look after the boy while I headed down to the river. The child cried out for me as I walked away."

"There was no one there at the bathing ghat when I arrived. As a swimmer, I was the best among all the village women. The river was quite full with the rains. I swam out into the middle of the stream some distance from the shore.

"There was no one at the bathing ghat when I got there. As a swimmer, I was the best among all the village women. The river was pretty full from the rains. I swam out into the middle of the stream, a ways from the shore."

"Then I heard a cry from the bank, 'Mother!' I turned my head and saw my boy coming down the steps, calling me as he came. I shouted to him to stop, but he went on, laughing and calling. My feet and hands became cramped with fear. I shut my eyes, afraid to see. When I opened them, there, at the slippery stairs, my boy's ripple of laughter had disappeared for ever.

"Then I heard a shout from the shore, 'Mom!' I turned my head and saw my son coming down the steps, calling out to me as he approached. I yelled for him to stop, but he kept going, laughing and calling. My hands and feet cramped up with fear. I squeezed my eyes shut, terrified to look. When I opened them, there, at the slippery stairs, my son's joyful laughter had vanished forever."

"I got back to the shore. I raised him from the water. I took him in my arms, my boy, my darling, who had begged so often in vain for me to take him. I took him now, but he no more looked in my eyes and called 'Mother.'

"I returned to the shore. I lifted him out of the water. I held him in my arms, my boy, my darling, who had often pleaded in vain for me to take him. I took him now, but he no longer looked into my eyes and called out 'Mother.'

"My child-God had come. I had ever neglected Him. I had ever made Him cry. And now all that neglect began to beat against my own heart, blow upon blow, blow upon blow. When my boy was with me, I had left him alone. I had refused to take him with me. And now, when he is dead, his memory clings to me and never leaves me.

"My child-God had arrived. I had always ignored Him. I had always made Him cry. And now all that neglect started to pound on my own heart, blow after blow, blow after blow. When my boy was with me, I had left him alone. I had refused to bring him along with me. And now, with him gone, his memory sticks to me and never goes away."

"God alone knows all that my husband suffered. If he had only punished me for my sin, it would have been better for us both. But he knew only how to endure in silence, not how to speak.

"Only God knows everything my husband went through. If he had just punished me for my wrongdoing, it would have been better for both of us. But he only knew how to suffer in silence, not how to express himself."

"When I was almost mad with grief, Guru Thakur came back. In earlier days, the relation between him and my husband had been that of boyish friendship. Now, my husband's reverence for his sanctity and learning was unbounded. He could hardly speak in his presence, his awe of him was so great.

"When I was nearly overwhelmed with grief, Guru Thakur returned. In the past, the connection between him and my husband had been a playful friendship. Now, my husband's respect for his holiness and knowledge was immense. He could barely speak in his presence; his admiration for him was so profound."

"My husband asked his Guru to try to give me some consolation. Guru Thakur began to read and explain to me the scriptures. But I do not think they had much effect on my mind. All their value for me lay in the voice that uttered them. God makes the draught of divine life deepest in the heart for man to drink, through the human voice. He has no better vessel in His hand than that; and He Himself drinks His divine draught out of the same vessel.

"My husband asked his Guru to try to give me some comfort. Guru Thakur started to read and explain the scriptures to me. But I don’t think they impacted my mind much. Their true value for me was in the voice that spoke them. God pours the essence of divine life most deeply into the human heart for us to receive through the human voice. That is His best vessel; and He Himself drinks from that same vessel."

"My husband's love and veneration for his Guru filled our house, as incense fills a temple shrine. I showed that veneration, and had peace. I saw my God in the form of that Guru. He used to come to take his meal at our house every morning. The first thought that would come to my mind on waking from sleep was that of his food as a sacred gift from God. When I prepared the things for his meal, my fingers would sing for joy.

My husband’s love and respect for his Guru filled our home, just like incense fills a temple. I showed that respect and found peace. I saw my God in the form of that Guru. He used to come to our house for his meal every morning. The first thought that came to me when I woke up was that his food was a sacred gift from God. As I prepared his meal, my fingers would sing with joy.

"When my husband saw my devotion to his Guru, his respect for me greatly increased. He noticed his Guru's eager desire to explain the scriptures to me. He used to think that he could never expect to earn any regard from his Guru himself, on account of his stupidity; but his wife had made up for it.

"When my husband saw how dedicated I was to his Guru, his respect for me grew a lot. He noticed his Guru's enthusiasm to explain the scriptures to me. He used to think that he would never earn any respect from his Guru due to his own foolishness; but his wife had made up for that."

"Thus another five years went by happily, and my whole life would have passed like that; but beneath the surface some stealing was going on somewhere in secret. I could not detect it; but it was detected by the God of my heart. Then came a day when, in a moment our whole life was turned upside down.

"Another five years went by happily, and my whole life could have gone on like that; but underneath, something was sneaking around secretly. I couldn't see it; but it was noticed by the God of my heart. Then one day, in an instant, our whole life was turned upside down."

"It was a morning in midsummer. I was returning home from bathing, my clothes all wet, down a shady lane. At the bend of the road, under the mango tree, I met my Guru Thakur. He had his towel on his shoulder and was repeating some Sanskrit verses as he was going to take his bath. With my wet clothes clinging all about me I was ashamed to meet him. I tried to pass by quickly, and avoid being seen. He called me by my name.

"It was a midsummer morning. I was walking home from swimming, my clothes all wet, along a shady path. At the curve in the road, under the mango tree, I ran into my Guru Thakur. He had a towel draped over his shoulder and was reciting some Sanskrit verses as he was about to take his bath. With my wet clothes sticking to me, I felt embarrassed to see him. I tried to hurry past and avoid being noticed. He called me by my name."

"I stopped, lowering my eyes, shrinking into myself. He fixed his gaze upon me, and said: 'How beautiful is your body!'

"I stopped, looking down, feeling small. He locked his gaze on me and said, 'Your body is beautiful!'"

"All the universe of birds seemed to break into song in the branches overhead. All the bushes in the lane seemed ablaze with flowers. It was as though the earth and sky and everything had become a riot of intoxicating joy.

"All the birds in the universe seemed to burst into song in the branches above. All the bushes along the path looked vibrant with flowers. It felt like the earth, sky, and everything else had transformed into a celebration of pure joy."

"I cannot tell how I got home. I only remember that I rushed into the room where we worship God. But the room seemed empty. Only before my eyes those same gold spangles of light were dancing which had quivered in front of me in that shady lane on my way back from the river.

"I can't remember how I got home. I just remember rushing into the room where we worship God. But the room felt empty. All I could see were those same gold speckles of light dancing in front of me, just like they had in that shady path on my way back from the river."

"Guru Thakur came to take his food that day, and asked my husband where I had gone. He searched for me, but could not find me anywhere.

"Guru Thakur came to eat that day and asked my husband where I was. He looked for me but couldn't find me anywhere."

"Ah! I have not the same earth now any longer. The same sunlight is not mine. I called on my God in my dismay, and He kept His face turned away from me.

"Ah! I no longer have the same earth. The same sunlight isn’t mine anymore. I called out to my God in my distress, and He turned His face away from me."

"The day passed, I know not how. That night I had to meet my husband. But the night is dark and silent. It is the time when my husband's mind comes out shining, like stars at twilight. I had heard him speak things in the dark, and I had been surprised to find how deeply he understood.

"The day went by, and I have no idea how. That night, I needed to meet my husband. But the night is dark and quiet. It's when my husband's thoughts emerge bright, like stars at dusk. I’ve heard him say things in the dark, and I was amazed to discover how deeply he understood."

"Sometimes I am late in the evening in going to rest on account of household work. My husband waits for me, seated on the floor, without going to bed. Our talk at such times had often begun with something about our Guru.

"Sometimes I stay up late in the evening to finish household chores. My husband waits for me, sitting on the floor instead of going to bed. Our conversations at those times often start with something about our Guru."

"That night, when it was past midnight, I came to my room, and found my husband sleeping on the floor. Without disturbing him I lay down on the ground at his feet, my head towards him. Once he stretched his feet, while sleeping, and struck me on the breast. That was his last bequest.

"That night, after midnight, I came to my room and found my husband sleeping on the floor. Without waking him, I lay down on the ground at his feet, my head facing him. At one point, while he was sleeping, he stretched out his feet and hit me on the chest. That was his final gift."

"Next morning, when my husband woke up from his sleep, I was already sitting by him. Outside the window, over the thick foliage of the jack-fruit tree, appeared the first pale red of the dawn at the fringe of the night. It was so early that the crows had not yet begun to call.

"Next morning, when my husband woke up from his sleep, I was already sitting by him. Outside the window, over the thick foliage of the jackfruit tree, the first pale red of dawn appeared at the edge of the night. It was so early that the crows hadn’t started cawing yet."

"I bowed, and touched my husband's feet with my forehead. He sat up, starting as if waking from a dream, and looked at my face in amazement. I said:

"I bowed and touched my husband's feet with my forehead. He sat up, startled as if waking from a dream, and looked at my face in surprise. I said:

"'I have made up my mind. I must leave the world. I cannot belong to you any longer. I must leave your home.'

"'I've made my decision. I need to leave this world. I can't stay with you any longer. I have to go from your home.'"

"Perhaps my husband thought that he was still dreaming. He said not a word.

"Maybe my husband thought he was still dreaming. He didn't say a word."

"'Ah! do hear me!' I pleaded with infinite pain. 'Do hear me and understand! You must marry another wife. I must take my leave.'

"'Ah! Please listen to me!' I begged, filled with deep sorrow. 'You need to marry someone else. I have to go now.'"

"My husband said: 'What is all this wild, mad talk? Who advises you to leave the world?'

"My husband said, 'What is all this crazy talk? Who's telling you to leave the world?'"

"I said: 'My Guru Thakur.'

"I said: 'My Guru.'”

"My husband looked bewildered. 'Guru Thakur!' he cried. 'When did he give you this advice?'

"My husband looked confused. 'Guru Thakur!' he exclaimed. 'When did he give you this advice?'"

"'In the morning,' I answered, 'yesterday, when I met him on my way back from the river.'

"'In the morning,' I replied, 'yesterday, when I ran into him on my way back from the river.'"

"His voice trembled a little. He turned, and looked in my face, and asked me: 'Why did he give you such a behest?'

"His voice shook slightly. He turned, looked me in the eye, and asked, 'Why did he give you such a command?'"

"'I do not know,' I answered. 'Ask him! He will tell you himself, if he can.'

"I don't know," I replied. "Ask him! He'll tell you himself, if he can."

"My husband said: 'It is possible to leave the world, even when continuing to live in it. You need not leave my home. I will speak to my Guru about it.'

"My husband said: 'You can step away from the world, even while still living in it. You don’t have to leave my home. I’ll talk to my Guru about it.'"

"'Your Guru,' I said, 'may accept your petition; but my heart will never give its consent. I must leave your home. From henceforth, the world is no more to me.'

"'Your Guru,' I said, 'might accept your request; but my heart will never agree. I have to leave your home. From now on, the world means nothing to me.'"

"My husband remained silent, and we sat there on the floor in the dark. When it was light, he said to me: 'Let us both come to him.'

"My husband stayed quiet, and we sat there on the floor in the dark. When it got light, he said to me: 'Let’s both go to him.'"

"I folded my hands and said: 'I shall never meet him again.'

"I clasped my hands and said, 'I will never see him again.'"

"He looked into my face. I lowered my eyes. He said no more. I knew that, somehow, he had seen into my mind, and understood what was there. In this world of mine, there were only two who loved me best—my boy and my husband. That love was my God, and therefore it could brook no falsehood. One of these two left me, and I left the other. Now I must have truth, and truth alone."

"He looked into my face. I looked down. He didn’t say anything else. I knew that, somehow, he had seen into my mind and understood what was there. In my world, there were only two who loved me the most—my son and my husband. That love was my everything, so it couldn’t allow any lies. One of them left me, and I left the other. Now I need truth, and nothing but the truth."

She touched the ground at my feet, rose and bowed to me, and departed.

She touched the ground at my feet, stood up, bowed to me, and left.





VISION

I

When I was a very young wife, I gave birth to a dead child, and came near to death myself. I recovered strength very slowly, and my eyesight became weaker and weaker.

When I was a young wife, I had a stillborn baby and nearly died myself. I slowly regained my strength, but my eyesight continued to worsen.

My husband at this time was studying medicine. He was not altogether sorry to have a chance of testing his medical knowledge on me. So he began to treat my eyes himself.

My husband was studying medicine at the time. He wasn't completely unhappy to have the opportunity to test his medical knowledge on me. So, he started to treat my eyes himself.

My elder brother was reading for his law examination. One day he came to see me, and was alarmed at my condition.

My older brother was studying for his law exam. One day he came to visit me and was worried about how I was doing.

"What are you doing?" he said to my husband. "You are ruining Kumo's eyes. You ought to consult a good doctor at once."

"What are you doing?" he said to my husband. "You're ruining Kumo's eyes. You need to see a good doctor right away."

My husband said irritably: "Why! what can a good doctor do more than I am doing? The case is quite a simple one, and the remedies are all well known."

My husband said irritably, "What more can a good doctor do than I am doing? This case is pretty simple, and the treatments are all well known."

Dada answered with scorn: "I suppose you think there is no difference between you and a Professor in your own Medical College."

Dada responded with disdain: "I guess you believe there's no difference between you and a professor at your own medical school."

My husband replied angrily: "If you ever get married, and there is a dispute about your wife's property, you won't take my advice about Law. Why, then, do you now come advising me about Medicine?"

My husband replied angrily, "If you ever get married and there's a dispute over your wife's property, you won't listen to my advice about the law. So why are you giving me advice about medicine now?"

While they were quarrelling, I was saying to myself that it was always the poor grass that suffered most when two kings went to war. Here was a dispute going on between these two, and I had to bear the brunt of it.

While they were arguing, I was thinking to myself that it was always the poor grass that suffered the most when two kings went to war. Here was a conflict happening between these two, and I had to take the hit for it.

It also seemed to me very unfair that, when my family had given me in marriage, they should interfere afterwards. After all, my pleasure and pain are my husband's concern, not theirs.

It also seemed very unfair to me that, after my family had married me off, they would interfere afterward. After all, my happiness and suffering are my husband's responsibility, not theirs.

From that day forward, merely over this trifling matter of my eyes, the bond between my husband and Dada was strained.

From that day on, just because of this small issue with my eyes, the relationship between my husband and Dada became strained.

To my surprise one afternoon, while my husband was away, Dada brought a doctor in to see me. He examined my eyes very carefully, and looked grave. He said that further neglect would be dangerous. He wrote out a prescription, and Dada for the medicine at once. When the strange doctor had gone, I implored my Dada not to interfere. I was sure that only evil would come from the stealthy visits of a doctor.

To my surprise one afternoon, while my husband was away, Dada brought a doctor in to see me. He examined my eyes very carefully and looked serious. He said that further neglect would be dangerous. He wrote out a prescription, and Dada went to get the medicine right away. When the strange doctor left, I begged my Dada not to interfere. I was certain that only bad things would come from the secret visits of a doctor.

I was surprised at myself for plucking up courage speak to my brother like that. I had always hitherto been afraid of him. I am sure also that Dada was surprised at my boldness. He kept silence for a while, and then said to me: "Very well, Kumo. I won't call in the doctor any more. But when the medicine comes you must take it."

I was surprised at myself for finding the courage to talk to my brother like that. I had always been afraid of him up to that point. I'm sure Dada was also surprised by my boldness. He paused for a moment and then said to me, "Alright, Kumo. I won't call the doctor anymore. But when the medicine arrives, you have to take it."

Dada then went away. The medicine came from chemist. I took it—bottles, powders, prescriptions and all—and threw it down the well!

Dada then left. The medicine came from the pharmacy. I took it—bottles, powders, prescriptions, and all—and dumped it down the well!

My husband had been irritated by Dada's interference, and he began to treat my eyes with greater diligence than ever. He tried all sorts of remedies. I bandaged my eyes as he told me, I wore his coloured glasses, I put in his drops, I took all his powders. I even drank the cod-liver oil he gave me, though my gorge rose against it.

My husband was annoyed by Dada's meddling, and he started to take care of my eyes more than ever. He tried all kinds of treatments. I bandaged my eyes like he instructed, wore his tinted glasses, used his eye drops, and took all his pills. I even drank the cod liver oil he offered me, even though I couldn't stand it.

Each time he came back from the hospital, he would ask me anxiously how I felt; and I would answer: "Oh! much better." Indeed I became an expert in self-delusion. When I found that the water in my eyes was still increasing, I would console myself with the thought that it was a good thing to get rid of so much bad fluid; and, when the flow of water in my eyes decreased, I was elated at my husband's skill.

Each time he came back from the hospital, he would nervously ask me how I was feeling, and I would respond, "Oh! Much better." I actually became really good at fooling myself. Whenever I noticed that the tears in my eyes were still increasing, I would try to cheer myself up by thinking it was good to get rid of all that bad fluid; and when the tears decreased, I felt proud of my husband's skills.

But after a while the agony became unbearable. My eyesight faded away, and I had continual headaches day and night. I saw how much alarmed my husband was getting. I gathered from his manner that he was casting about for a pretext to call in a doctor. So I hinted that it might be as well to call one in.

But eventually, the pain became too much to handle. My vision started to go, and I had constant headaches, day and night. I could see how worried my husband was getting. From the way he acted, I could tell he was looking for a reason to call a doctor. So I suggested that it might be a good idea to bring one in.

That he was greatly relieved, I could see. He called in an English doctor that very day. I do not know what talk they had together, but I gathered that the Sahib had spoken very sharply to my husband.

I could tell he was really relieved. He called in an English doctor that same day. I don't know what they talked about, but it seemed like the Sahib had spoken pretty harshly to my husband.

He remained silent for some time after the doctor had gone. I took his hands in mine, and said: "What an ill-mannered brute that was! Why didn't you call in an Indian doctor? That would have been much better. Do you think that man knows better than you do about my eyes?"

He stayed quiet for a while after the doctor left. I held his hands and said, "What a rude jerk that guy was! Why didn’t you get an Indian doctor? That would have been way better. Do you really think that guy knows more about my eyes than you do?"

My husband was very silent for a moment, and then said with a broken voice: "Kumo, your eyes must be operated on."

My husband was quiet for a moment, then said with a shaky voice, "Kumo, you need eye surgery."

I pretended to be vexed with him for concealing the fact from me so long.

I acted like I was upset with him for keeping it from me for so long.

"Here you have known this all the time," said I, "and yet you have said nothing about it! Do you think I am such a baby as to be afraid of an operation?"

"You've known this all along," I said, "and yet you haven't said a word about it! Do you really think I’m so naive that I’d be scared of a procedure?"

At that he regained his good spirits: "There are very few men," said he, "who are heroic enough to look forward to an operation without shrinking."

At that, he cheered up: "There are really only a handful of guys," he said, "who are brave enough to face an operation without flinching."

I laughed at him: "Yes, that is so. Men are heroic only before their wives!"

I laughed at him: "Yeah, that's true. Men are only heroic in front of their wives!"

He looked at me gravely, and said: "You are perfectly right. We men are dreadfully vain."

He looked at me seriously and said, "You're absolutely right. We men are really vain."

I laughed away his seriousness: "Are you sure you can beat us women even in vanity?"

I laughed off his seriousness: "Are you really confident you can outdo us women when it comes to vanity?"

When Dada came, I took him aside: "Dada, that treatment your doctor recommended would have done me a world of good; only unfortunately. I mistook the mixture for the lotion. And since the day I made the mistake, my eyes have grown steadily worse; and now an operation is needed."

When Dada arrived, I pulled him aside: "Dada, that treatment your doctor suggested would have really helped me; unfortunately, I confused the mixture with the lotion. Ever since I made that mistake, my eyesight has been getting worse, and now I need surgery."

Dada said to me: "You were under your husband's treatment, and that is why I gave up coming to visit you."

Dada told me, "You were seeing your husband, and that's why I stopped visiting you."

"No," I answered. "In reality, I was secretly treating myself in accordance with your doctor's directions."

"No," I replied. "Actually, I was secretly taking care of myself following your doctor's instructions."

Oh! what lies we women have to tell! When we are mothers, we tell lies to pacify our children; and when we are wives, we tell lies to pacify the fathers of our children. We are never free from this necessity.

Oh! what lies we women have to tell! When we’re mothers, we tell lies to comfort our kids; and when we’re wives, we tell lies to keep our husbands happy. We’re never free from this necessity.

My deception had the effect of bringing about a better feeling between my husband and Dada. Dada blamed himself for asking me to keep a secret from my husband: and my husband regretted that he had not taken my brother's advice at the first.

My deception improved the relationship between my husband and Dada. Dada felt guilty for asking me to keep a secret from my husband, and my husband wished he had listened to my brother's advice in the first place.

At last, with the consent of both, an English doctor came, and operated on my left eye. That eye, however, was too weak to bear the strain; and the last flickering glimmer of light went out. Then the other eye gradually lost itself in darkness.

At last, with both of their approval, an English doctor arrived and operated on my left eye. However, that eye was too weak to handle the pressure, and the last faint glimmer of light disappeared. Then, my other eye slowly faded into darkness.

One day my husband came to my bedside. "I cannot brazen it out before you any longer," said he, "Kumo, it is I who have ruined your eyes."

One day my husband came to my bedside. "I can't pretend any longer," he said, "Kumo, it’s me who has ruined your eyes."

I felt that his voice was choking with tears, and so I took up his right hand in both of mine and said: "Why! you did exactly what was right. You have dealt only with that which was your very own. Just imagine, if some strange doctor had come and taken away my eyesight. What consolation should I have had then? But now I can feel that all has happened for the best; and my great comfort is to know that it is at your hands I have lost my eyes. When Ramchandra found one lotus too few with which to worship God, he offered both his eyes in place of the lotus. And I hate dedicated my eyes to my God. From now, whenever you see something that is a joy to you, then you must describe it to me; and I will feed upon your words as a sacred gift left over from your vision."

I could tell his voice was trembling with tears, so I took his right hand in both of mine and said, "You did exactly what was right. You only took what belonged to you. Just think, if some unknown doctor had come and taken away my sight, what comfort would I have had then? But now I truly believe everything has happened for the best; my biggest comfort is knowing that I lost my sight at your hands. When Ramchandra found he had one lotus too few to offer to God, he gave both his eyes instead of the lotus. And I have dedicated my eyes to my God. From now on, whenever you see something that brings you joy, you must describe it to me; I will savor your words as a sacred gift left behind from your vision."

I do not mean, of course, that I said all this there and then, for it is impossible to speak these things an the spur of the moment. But I used to think over words like these for days and days together. And when I was very depressed, or if at any time the light of my devotion became dim, and I pitied my evil fate, then I made my mind utter these sentences, one by one, as a child repeats a story that is told. And so I could breathe once more the serener air of peace and love.

I don’t mean to say that I actually spoke all of this at that moment, because it’s impossible to voice such thoughts on the spot. But I would think about words like these for days on end. When I was really down or when my sense of devotion started to fade and I felt sorry for my unfortunate situation, I would make myself repeat these sentences one by one, like a child reciting a story. And in doing so, I could once again breathe in the clearer air of peace and love.

At the very time of our talk together, I said enough to show my husband what was in my heart.

At the moment we were talking, I said enough to reveal to my husband what I was feeling inside.

"Kumo," he said to me, "the mischief I have done by my folly can never be made good. But I can do one thing. I can ever remain by your side, and try to make up for your want of vision as much as is in my power."

"Kumo," he said to me, "the trouble I’ve caused with my foolishness can never be fixed. But I can do one thing. I can always stay by your side and try to compensate for your lack of vision as much as I can."

"No," said I. "That will never do. I shall not ask you to turn your house into an hospital for the blind. There is only one thing to be done, you must marry again."

"No," I said. "That won't work. I'm not going to ask you to turn your house into a hospital for the blind. There's only one thing to do: you have to get married again."

As I tried to explain to him that this was necessary, my voice broke a little. I coughed, and tried to hide my emotion, but he burst out saying:

As I tried to explain to him that this was necessary, my voice wavered a bit. I coughed and tried to hide my feelings, but he suddenly said:

"Kumo, I know I am a fool, and a braggart, and all that, but I am not a villain! If ever I marry again, I swear to you—I swear to you the most solemn oath by my family god, Gopinath—may that most hated of all sins, the sin of parricide, fall on my head!"

"Kumo, I know I'm a fool and a showoff, and all that, but I'm not a villain! If I ever marry again, I promise you—I promise you the most serious oath by my family god, Gopinath—may the worst of all sins, the sin of killing my own father, fall on me!"

Ah! I should never, never have allowed him to swear that dreadful oath. But tears were choking my voice, and I could not say a word for insufferable joy. I hid my blind face in my pillows, and sobbed, and sobbed again. At last, when the first flood of my tears was over, I drew his head down to my breast.

Ah! I should never have let him swear that awful oath. But tears were choking my voice, and I couldn't say a word for overwhelming joy. I buried my face in my pillows and sobbed, and sobbed again. Finally, when the first wave of my tears was over, I pulled his head down to my chest.

"Ah!" said I, "why did you take such a terrible oath? Do you think I asked you to marry again for your own sordid pleasure? No! I was thinking of myself, for she could perform those services which were mine to give you when I had my sight."

"Ah!" I said, "why did you take such a terrible vow? Do you really think I asked you to marry again for your own selfish enjoyment? No! I was thinking about myself, because she could provide those things that I used to offer you when I could see."

"Services!" said he, "services! Those can be done by servants. Do you think I am mad enough to bring a slave into my house, and bid her share the throne with this my Goddess?"

"Services!" he said. "Services! Those can be done by servants. Do you think I'm crazy enough to bring a slave into my house and have her share the throne with my Goddess?"

As he said the word "Goddess," he held up my face in his hands, and placed a kiss between my brows. At that moment the third eye of divine wisdom was opened, where he kissed me, and verily I had a consecration.

As he spoke the word "Goddess," he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me between my brows. In that moment, the third eye of divine wisdom opened where he kissed me, and indeed, I felt a sense of consecration.

I said in my own mind: "It is well. I am no longer able to serve him in the lower world of household cares. But I shall rise to a higher region. I shall bring down blessings from above. No more lies! No more deceptions for me! All the littlenesses and hypocrisies of my former life shall be banished for ever!"

I thought to myself, "This is good. I can’t serve him in the everyday grind anymore. But I will move to a higher place. I’ll bring down blessings from above. No more lies! No more tricks for me! All the small-mindedness and hypocrisy of my past life will be gone forever!"

That day, the whole day through, I felt a conflict going on within me. The joy of the thought, that after this solemn oath it was impossible for my husband to marry again, fixed its roots deep in my heart, and I could not tear them out. But the new Goddess, who had taken her new throne in me, said: "The time might come when it would be good for your husband to break his oath and marry again." But the woman, who was within me, said: "That may be; but all the same an oath is an oath, and there is no way out." The Goddess, who was within me, answered: "That is no reason why you should exult over it." But the woman, who was within me, replied: "What you say is quite true, no doubt; all the same he has taken his oath." And the same story went on again and again. At last the Goddess frowned in silence, and the darkness of a horrible fear came down upon me.

That day, I felt a conflict going on inside me all day long. The joy of knowing that after this solemn oath my husband couldn't marry again took root deep in my heart, and I couldn’t shake it off. But the new voice inside me said, “There might come a time when it’s right for your husband to break his oath and marry again.” However, the woman inside me argued, “That may be true, but an oath is an oath, and there’s no way around it.” The voice within me continued, “That doesn’t mean you should celebrate it.” But the woman replied, “What you’re saying is definitely true; still, he has sworn an oath.” And this back-and-forth kept happening over and over. Finally, the voice fell silent with a frown, and I was overwhelmed by a terrible sense of fear.

My repentant husband would not let the servants do my work; he must do it all himself. At first it gave me unbounded delight to be dependent on him thus for every little thing. It was a means of keeping him by my side, and my desire to have him with me had become intense since my blindness. That share of his presence, which my eyes had lost, my other senses craved. When he was absent from my side, I would feel as if I were hanging in mid-air, and had lost my hold of all things tangible.

My remorseful husband wouldn’t let the staff handle my responsibilities; he insisted on doing everything himself. At first, I found it incredibly fulfilling to rely on him for even the smallest tasks. It was a way to keep him close, and my urge to have him near me had intensified since I lost my sight. The part of his presence that my eyes could no longer perceive was something my other senses longed for. When he wasn’t by my side, I felt like I was floating in mid-air, having lost my grip on everything real.

Formerly, when my husband came back late from the hospital, I used to open my window and gaze at the road. That road was the link which connected his world with mine. Now when I had lost that link through my blindness, all my body would go out to seek him. The bridge that united us had given way, and there was now this unsurpassable chasm. When he left my side the gulf seemed to yawn wide open. I could only wait for the time when he should cross back again from his own shore to mine.

Before, when my husband came home late from the hospital, I would open my window and look out at the road. That road was the connection between his world and mine. Now that I had lost that connection because of my blindness, my whole body would reach out to find him. The bridge that brought us together had collapsed, and now there was this insurmountable gap. When he left my side, the chasm felt like it was wide open. I could only wait for the moment when he would return from his side to mine.

But such intense longing and such utter dependence can never be good. A wife is a burden enough to a man, in all conscience, and to add to it the burden of this blindness was to make his life unbearable. I vowed that I would suffer alone, and never wrap my husband round in the folds of my all-pervading darkness.

But such deep longing and complete dependence can never be a good thing. A wife is already a burden to a man, honestly, and to add to that the weight of this blindness would make his life unbearable. I promised myself that I would endure alone and never envelop my husband in the shadows of my all-consuming darkness.

Within an incredibly short space of time I managed to train myself to do all my household duties by the help of touch and sound and smell. In fact I soon found that I could get on with greater skill than before. For sight often distracts rather than helps us. And so it came to pass that, when these roving eyes of mine could do their work no longer, all the other senses took up their several duties with quietude and completeness.

In a very short amount of time, I trained myself to handle all my household tasks using just touch, sound, and smell. I realized I could actually do them better than before. Sight often distracts us instead of helping us. So, when my wandering eyes could no longer do their job, all my other senses stepped in and took on their responsibilities smoothly and effectively.

When I had gained experience by constant practice, I would not let my husband do any more household duties for me. He complained bitterly at first that I was depriving him of his penance.

Once I got the hang of things through constant practice, I wouldn't let my husband handle any more household chores for me. At first, he grumbled a lot, saying I was taking away his chance to do penance.

This did not convince me. Whatever he might say, I could feel that he had a real sense of relief when these household duties were over. To serve daily a wife who is blind can never make up the life of a man.

This didn't convince me. No matter what he said, I could sense that he truly felt relieved when these household chores were done. Taking care of a blind wife every day can never fulfill a man's life.

II

II

My husband at last had finished his medical course. He went away from Calcutta to a small town to practise as a doctor. There in the country I felt with joy, through all my blindness, that I was restored to the arms of my mother. I had left my village birthplace for Calcutta when I was eight years old. Since then ten years had passed away, and in the great city the memory of my village home had grown dim. As long as I had eyesight, Calcutta with its busy life screened from view the memory of my early days. But when I lost my eyesight I knew for the first time that Calcutta allured only the eyes: it could not fill the mind. And now, in my blindness, the scenes of my childhood shone out once more, like stars that appear one by one in the evening sky at the end of the day.

My husband finally finished his medical course. He left Calcutta to practice as a doctor in a small town. There in the countryside, I felt a joyful sense of being back in my mother’s arms, despite my blindness. I had moved from my village to Calcutta when I was eight years old. Now, ten years had passed, and the memory of my village home had faded in the busy city. While I could see, Calcutta's hustle and bustle had drowned out the memories of my early days. But after losing my sight, I realized for the first time that Calcutta only captivated the eyes; it couldn’t nourish the mind. Now, in my blindness, the memories of my childhood shone through again, like stars appearing one by one in the evening sky at the end of the day.

It was the beginning of November when we left Calcutta for Harsingpur. The place was new to me, but the scents and sounds of the countryside pressed round and embraced me. The morning breeze coming fresh from the newly ploughed land, the sweet and tender smell of the flowering mustard, the shepherd-boy's flute sounding in the distance, even the creaking noise of the bullock-cart, as it groaned over the broken village road, filled my world with delight. The memory of my past life, with all its ineffable fragrance and sound, became a living present to me, and my blind eyes could not tell me I was wrong. I went back, and lived over again my childhood. Only one thing was absent: my mother was not with me.

It was early November when we left Calcutta for Harsingpur. The place was new to me, but the scents and sounds of the countryside wrapped around me like a warm embrace. The morning breeze carried the freshness from the freshly plowed fields, the sweet and gentle scent of blooming mustard filled the air, the distant sound of a shepherd-boy's flute played softly, and even the creaky noise of the bullock cart as it struggled over the bumpy village road brought me joy. Memories of my past life, with all its indescribable aromas and sounds, became a vivid part of my present, and my blind eyes couldn’t convince me otherwise. I found myself reminiscing about my childhood. The only thing missing was my mother; she wasn't with me.

I could see my home with the large peepul trees growing along the edge of the village pool. I could picture in my mind's eye my old grandmother seated on the ground with her thin wisps of hair untied, warming her back in the sun as she made the little round lentil balls to be dried and used for cooking. But somehow I could not recall the songs she used to croon to herself in her weak and quavering voice. In the evening, whenever I heard the lowing of cattle, I could almost watch the figure of my mother going round the sheds with lighted lamp in her hand. The smell of the wet fodder and the pungent smoke of the straw fire would enter into my very heart. And in the distance I seemed to hear the clanging of the temple bell wafted up by the breeze from the river bank.

I could see my home with the large peepul trees growing along the edge of the village pond. I could picture my old grandmother sitting on the ground with her thin strands of hair down, soaking up the sun while making little round lentil balls to dry for cooking. But I couldn’t quite remember the songs she used to hum to herself in her weak, trembling voice. In the evening, whenever I heard the lowing of cattle, I could almost see my mother moving around the sheds with a lit lamp in her hand. The smell of wet fodder and the strong smoke from the straw fire would fill my heart. And in the distance, it felt like I could hear the temple bell ringing, carried by the breeze from the riverbank.

Calcutta, with all its turmoil and gossip, curdles the heart. There, all the beautiful duties of life lose their freshness and innocence. I remember one day, when a friend of mine came in, and said to me: "Kumo, why don't you feel angry? If I had been treated like you by my husband, I would never look upon his face again."

Calcutta, with all its chaos and chatter, breaks your heart. There, all the beautiful responsibilities of life lose their freshness and purity. I remember one day when a friend of mine came in and said to me, "Kumo, why aren't you angry? If my husband treated me like that, I would never want to see him again."

She tried to make me indignant, because he had been so long calling in a doctor.

She tried to make me upset because he had taken so long to call a doctor.

"My blindness," said I, "was itself a sufficient evil. Why should I make it worse by allowing hatred to grow up against my husband?"

"My blindness," I said, "was already a big enough problem. Why should I make it worse by letting hatred build up against my husband?"

My friend shook her head in great contempt, when she heard such old-fashioned talk from the lips of a mere chit of a girl. She went away in disdain. But whatever might be my answer at the time, such words as these left their poison; and the venom was never wholly got out of the soul, when once they had been uttered.

My friend rolled her eyes in disgust when she heard such outdated remarks from a mere young girl. She walked away in disdain. But no matter how I responded at the time, words like those left their mark; and the bitterness was never completely removed from my soul once they had been spoken.

So you see Calcutta, with its never-ending gossip, does harden the heart. But when I came back to the country all my earlier hopes and faiths, all that I held true in life during childhood, became fresh and bright once more. God came to me, and filled my heart and my world. I bowed to Him, and said:

So you see, Calcutta, with its endless gossip, can really harden a person’s heart. But when I returned to the countryside, all my earlier hopes and beliefs, everything I valued in life as a child, became new and vibrant again. God came to me and filled my heart and my world. I bowed to Him and said:

"It is well that Thou has taken away my eyes. Thou art with me."

"It’s good that you’ve taken away my sight. You’re with me."

Ah! But I said more than was right. It was a presumption to say: "Thou art with me." All we can say is this: "I must be true to Thee." Even when nothing is left for us, still we have to go on living.

Ah! But I said more than I should have. It was arrogant to say, "You are with me." All we can say is, "I must be true to you." Even when we have nothing left, we still have to keep living.

III

III

We passed a few happy months together. My husband gained some reputation in his profession as a doctor. And money came with it.

We spent a few happy months together. My husband gained a reputation in his profession as a doctor. And money came along with it.

But there is a mischief in money. I cannot point to any one event; but, because the blind have keener perceptions than other people, I could discern the change which came over my husband along with the increase of wealth.

But there's a trickiness about money. I can't pinpoint a specific event; however, since the blind have sharper insights than others, I noticed the shift in my husband that came with the rise in our wealth.

He had a keen sense of justice when he was younger, and had often told me of his great desire to help the poor when once he obtained a practice of his own. He had a noble contempt far those in his profession who would not feel the pulse of a poor patient before collecting his fee. But now I noticed a difference. He had become strangely hard. Once when a poor woman came, and begged him, out of charity, to save the life of her only child, he bluntly refused. And when I implored him myself to help her, he did his work perfunctorily.

He had a strong sense of justice when he was younger and often shared his great desire to help the poor once he started his own practice. He had a noble disdain for those in his profession who wouldn't check the pulse of a poor patient before collecting their fee. But now I noticed a change. He had become strangely callous. Once, when a poor woman came and pleaded with him, out of kindness, to save the life of her only child, he flatly refused. And when I begged him myself to help her, he did his work in a halfhearted way.

While we were less rich my husband disliked sharp practice in money matters. He was scrupulously honourable in such things. But since he had got a large account at the bank he was often closeted for hours with some scamp of a landlord's agent, for purposes which clearly boded no good.

While we had less money, my husband couldn't stand dishonest behavior when it came to finances. He was very honorable about these things. But now that he had a large bank account, he often spent hours alone with some shady landlord's agent, which clearly didn't seem to be a good sign.

Where has he drifted? What has become of this husband of mine,—the husband I knew before I was blind; the husband who kissed me that day between my brows, and enshrined me on the throne of a Goddess? Those whom a sudden gust of passion brings down to the dust can rise up again with a new strong impulse of goodness. But those who, day by day, become dried up in the very fibre of their moral being; those who by some outer parasitic growth choke the inner life by slow degrees,—such wench one day a deadness which knows no healing.

Where has he gone? What happened to this husband of mine—the husband I knew before I was blind; the husband who kissed me that day between my brows and put me on a pedestal like a goddess? Those who are suddenly knocked down by passion can rise again with a new, strong desire to be good. But those who, day by day, become numb in the very core of their moral being; those who let some external influence slowly stifle their inner life—such people eventually experience a deadness that cannot be healed.

The separation caused by blindness is the merest physical trifle. But, ah! it suffocates me to find that he is no longer with me, where he stood with me in that hour when we both knew that I was blind. That is a separation indeed!

The distance created by blindness is just a minor physical issue. But, oh! it crushes me to realize that he is no longer here with me, where he was in that moment when we both knew that I was blind. That’s a real separation!

I, with my love fresh and my faith unbroken, have kept to the shelter of my heart's inner shrine. But my husband has left the cool shade of those things that are ageless and unfading. He is fast disappearing into the barren, waterless waste in his mad thirst for gold.

I, with my love new and my faith strong, have stayed in the sanctuary of my heart. But my husband has left the cool comfort of things that are timeless and everlasting. He is quickly vanishing into the dry, empty desert in his crazy pursuit of gold.

Sometimes the suspicion comes to me that things not so bad as they seem: that perhaps I exaggerate because I am blind. It may be that, if my eyesight were unimpaired, I should have accepted world as I found it. This, at any rate, was the light in which my husband looked at all my moods and fancies.

Sometimes I wonder if things aren't as bad as they seem: that maybe I exaggerate because I'm blind to certain aspects. It might be that if my eyesight were clear, I would have accepted the world as it is. This, at least, was how my husband viewed all my moods and whims.

One day an old Musalman came to the house. He asked my husband to visit his little grand-daughter. I could hear the old man say: "Baba, I am a poor man; but come with me, and Allah will do you good." My husband answered coldly: "What Allah will do won't help matters; I want to know what you can do for me."

One day, an old Muslim man came to the house. He asked my husband to visit his little granddaughter. I could hear the old man say, "Baba, I’m a poor man, but come with me, and Allah will help you." My husband replied coldly, "What Allah will do won’t change anything; I want to know what you can do for me."

When I heard it, I wondered in my mind why God had not made me deaf as well as blind. The old man heaved a deep sigh, and departed. I sent my maid to fetch him to my room. I met him at the door of the inner apartment, and put some money into his hand.

When I heard it, I thought to myself why God hadn't made me deaf as well as blind. The old man let out a deep sigh and left. I sent my maid to bring him to my room. I found him at the door of the inner apartment and gave him some money.

"Please take this from me," said I, "for your little grand-daughter, and get a trustworthy doctor to look after her. And-pray for my husband."

"Please take this from me," I said, "for your little granddaughter, and get a reliable doctor to take care of her. And—please pray for my husband."

But the whole of that day I could take no food at all. In the afternoon, when my husband got up from sleep, he asked me: "Why do you look so pale?"

But the whole day I couldn't eat anything. In the afternoon, when my husband woke up from his nap, he asked me, "Why do you look so pale?"

I was about to say, as I used to do in the past: "Oh! It's nothing "; but those days of deception were over, and I spoke to him plainly.

I was about to say, like I usually did before: "Oh! It's nothing "; but those days of pretending were over, so I spoke to him honestly.

"I have been hesitating," I said, "for days together to tell you something. It has been hard to think out what exactly it was I wanted to say. Even now I may not be able to explain what I had in my mind. But I am sure you know what has happened. Our lives have drifted apart."

"I've been putting off telling you something for days," I said. "It's been tough to figure out exactly what I wanted to say. Even now, I might not be able to explain what I've been thinking. But I know you understand what’s happened. Our lives have grown apart."

My husband laughed in a forced manner, and said: "Change is the law of nature."

My husband laughed awkwardly and said, "Change is the law of nature."

I said to him: "I know that. But there are some things that are eternal."

I said to him, "I get that. But some things are timeless."

Then he became serious.

Then he got serious.

"There are many women," said he, "who have a real cause for sorrow. There are some whose husbands do not earn money. There are others whose husbands do not love them. But you are making yourself wretched about nothing at all."

"There are many women," he said, "who have a genuine reason to be upset. Some have husbands who don't make any money. Others have husbands who don't love them. But you're making yourself miserable over nothing at all."

Then it became clear to me that my very blindness had conferred on me the power of seeing a world which is beyond all change. Yes! It is true. I am not like other women. And my husband will never understand me.

Then it became clear to me that my blindness had given me the ability to see a world that is beyond all change. Yes! It's true. I am not like other women. And my husband will never understand me.

IV

IV

Our two lives went on with their dull routine for some time. Then there was a break in the monotony. An aunt of my husband came to pay us a visit.

Our two lives continued with their boring routine for a while. Then, there was a change in the monotony. An aunt of my husband came to visit us.

The first thing she blurted out after our first greeting was this: "Well, Krum, it's a great pity you have become blind; but why do you impose your own affliction on your husband? You must get him to another wife."

The first thing she said after our initial greeting was this: "Well, Krum, it’s really unfortunate you’ve gone blind; but why do you put your own burden on your husband? You need to find him another wife."

There was an awkward pause. If my husband had only said something in jest, or laughed in her face, all would have been over. But he stammered and hesitated, and said at last in a nervous, stupid way: "Do you really think so? Really, Aunt, you shouldn't talk like that."

There was an awkward pause. If my husband had just joked around or laughed at her, everything would have been fine. But he stumbled over his words and hesitated, finally saying in a nervous, silly way: "Do you really think so? Honestly, Aunt, you shouldn’t talk like that."

His aunt appealed to me. "Was I wrong, Kumo?"

His aunt reached out to me. "Was I wrong, Kumo?"

I laughed a hollow laugh.

I laughed an empty laugh.

"Had not you better," said I, "consult some one more competent to decide? The pickpocket never asks permission from the man whose pocket he is going to pick."

"Don't you think you should," I said, "talk to someone more qualified to make that decision? The pickpocket never asks for permission from the person whose pocket he’s about to pick."

"You are quite right," she replied blandly. "Abinash, my dear, let us have our little conference in private. What do you say to that?"

"You’re absolutely right," she said flatly. "Abinash, my dear, let’s have our little meeting in private. What do you think?"

After a few days my husband asked her, in my presence, if she knew of any girl of a decent family who could come and help me in my household work. He knew quite well that I needed no help. I kept silence.

After a few days, my husband asked her, while I was there, if she knew of any girl from a good family who could come and help me with the housework. He knew perfectly well that I didn't need any help. I stayed silent.

"Oh! there are heaps of them," replied his aunt. "My cousin has a daughter who is just of the marriageable age, and as nice a girl as you could wish. Her people would be only too glad to secure you as a husband."

"Oh! there are tons of them," replied his aunt. "My cousin has a daughter who is just the right age for marriage, and she's as sweet a girl as you could hope for. Her family would be more than happy to have you as a husband."

Again there came from him that forced, hesitating laugh, and he said: "But I never mentioned marriage."

Again, he let out that awkward, uncertain laugh and said, "But I never brought up marriage."

"How could you expect," asked his aunt, "a girl of decent family to come and live in your house without marriage?"

"How can you expect," his aunt asked, "a girl from a good family to come and live in your house without getting married?"

He had to admit that this was reasonable, and remained nervously silent.

He had to admit that this made sense, and stayed nervously quiet.

I stood alone within the closed doors of my blindness after he had gone, and called upon my God and prayed: "O God, save my husband."

I stood alone behind the closed doors of my blindness after he had left, and called upon my God and prayed: "O God, save my husband."

When I was coming out of the household shrine from my morning worship a few days later, his aunt took hold of both my hands warmly.

When I was leaving the home shrine after my morning prayers a few days later, his aunt grabbed both my hands warmly.

"Kumo, here is the girl," said she, "we were speaking about the other day. Her name is Hemangini. She will be delighted to meet you. Hemo, come here and be introduced to your sister."

"Kumo, here’s the girl we were talking about the other day," she said. "Her name is Hemangini. She'll be excited to meet you. Hemo, come here and meet your sister."

My husband entered the room at the same moment. He feigned surprise when he saw the strange girl, and was about to retire. But his aunt said: "Abinash, my dear, what are you running away for? There is no need to do that. Here is my cousin's daughter, Hemangini, come to see you. Hemo, make your bow to him."

My husband walked into the room at the same time. He pretended to be surprised when he saw the strange girl and was about to leave. But his aunt said, "Abinash, dear, why are you trying to escape? There's no need for that. Here’s my cousin's daughter, Hemangini, come to see you. Hemo, say hello to him."

As if taken quite by surprise, he began to ply his aunt with questions about the when and why and how of the new arrival.

As if caught off guard, he started bombarding his aunt with questions about the when, why, and how of the new arrival.

I saw the hollowness of the whole thing, and took Hemangini by the hand and led her to my own room. I gently stroked her face and arms and hair, and found that she was about fifteen years old, and very beautiful.

I saw the emptiness of it all and took Hemangini by the hand, leading her to my room. I gently touched her face, arms, and hair and realized that she was around fifteen years old and very beautiful.

As I felt her face, she suddenly burst out laughing and said: "Why! what are you doing? Are you hypnotising me?"

As I touched her face, she suddenly started laughing and said, "What are you doing? Are you trying to hypnotize me?"

That sweet ringing laughter of hers swept away in a moment all the dark clouds that stood between us. I threw my right arm about her neck.

That sweet, ringing laughter of hers instantly cleared away all the dark clouds that were between us. I wrapped my right arm around her neck.

"Dear one," said I, "I am trying to see you." And again I stroked her soft face with my left hand.

"Hey there," I said, "I’m trying to see you." And once more, I gently caressed her soft face with my left hand.

"Trying to see me?" she said, with a new burst of laughter. "Am I like a vegetable marrow, grown in your garden, that you want to feel me all round to see how soft I am?"

"Trying to see me?" she said, laughing again. "Am I like a squash from your garden that you want to poke all over to check how soft I am?"

I suddenly bethought me that she did not know I had lost my sight.

I suddenly realized that she didn't know I had gone blind.

"Sister, I am blind," said I.

"Sister, I can't see," I said.

She was silent. I could feel her big young eyes, full of curiosity, peering into my face. I knew they were full of pity. Then she grew thoughtful and puzzled, and said, after a short pause:

She was quiet. I could feel her wide, youthful eyes, filled with curiosity, looking into my face. I knew they were filled with sympathy. Then she became contemplative and confused, and said, after a brief pause:

"Oh! I see now. That was the reason your husband invited his aunt to come and stay here."

"Oh! I get it now. That’s why your husband invited his aunt to come and stay here."

"No!" I replied, "you are quite mistaken. He did not ask her to come. She came of her own accord."

"No!" I replied, "you've got it all wrong. He didn't ask her to come. She came on her own."

Hemangini went off into a peal of laughter. "That's just like my aunt," said she. "Oh I wasn't it nice of her to come without any invitation? But now she's come, you won't get her to move for some time, I can assure you!"

Hemangini burst into laughter. "That's just like my aunt," she said. "Oh, wasn't it nice of her to show up uninvited? But now that she's here, I can guarantee you won't be able to get her to leave for quite a while!"

Then she paused, and looked puzzled.

Then she stopped and looked confused.

"But why did father send me?" she asked. "Can you tell me that?"

"But why did Dad send me?" she asked. "Can you tell me that?"

The aunt had come into the room while we were talking. Hemangini said to her: "When are you thinking of going back, Aunt?"

The aunt walked into the room while we were talking. Hemangini asked her, "When are you planning to head back, Aunt?"

The aunt looked very much upset.

The aunt looked really upset.

"What a question to ask!" said she, "I've never seen such a restless body as you. We've only just come, and you ask when we're going back!"

"What a question to ask!" she said. "I've never seen someone so restless as you. We just got here, and you're already asking when we're leaving!"

"It is all very well for you," Hemangini said, "for this house belongs to your near relations. But what about me? I tell you plainly I can't stop here." And then she held my hand and said: "What do you think, dear?"

"It’s easy for you," Hemangini said, "since this house belongs to your close family. But what about me? Honestly, I can’t stay here." Then she took my hand and asked, "What do you think, dear?"

I drew her to my heart, but said nothing. The aunt was in a great difficulty. She felt the situation was getting beyond her control; so she proposed that she and her niece should go out together to bathe.

I pulled her close to my heart, but didn’t say a word. The aunt was in a tough spot. She sensed that things were spiraling out of her control, so she suggested that she and her niece go out together to swim.

"No! we two will go together," said Hemangini, clinging to me. The aunt gave in, fearing opposition if she tried to drag her away.

"No! We're going together," said Hemangini, holding onto me tightly. The aunt gave in, worried about the backlash if she tried to pull her away.

Going down to the river Hemangini asked me: "Why don't you have children?"

Going down to the river, Hemangini asked me, "Why don't you have kids?"

I was startled by her question, and answered: "How can I tell? My God has not given me any. That is the reason."

I was taken aback by her question and replied, "How can I know? My God hasn't given me any. That's why."

"No! That's not the reason," said Hemangini quickly. "You must have committed some sin. Look at my aunt. She is childless. It must be because her heart has some wickedness. But what wickedness is in your heart?"

"No! That's not it," Hemangini replied quickly. "You must have done something wrong. Look at my aunt. She can't have kids. It must be because her heart has some evil in it. But what evil is in your heart?"

The words hurt me. I have no solution to offer for the problem of evil. I sighed deeply, and said in the silence of my soul: "My God! Thou knowest the reason."

The words hurt me. I have no solution to offer for the problem of evil. I sighed deeply and said in the silence of my soul: "My God! You know the reason."

"Gracious goodness," cried Hemangini, "what are you sighing for? No one ever takes me seriously."

"Good grief," exclaimed Hemangini, "why are you sighing? No one ever takes me seriously."

And her laughter pealed across the river.

And her laughter rang out across the river.

V

V

I found out after this that there were constant interruptions in my husband's professional duties. He refused all calls from a distance, and would hurry away from his patients, even when they were close at hand.

I discovered afterward that my husband constantly interrupted his work. He ignored all calls from afar and would rush away from his patients, even when they were right in front of him.

Formerly it was only during the mid-day meals and at night-time that he could come into the inner apartment. But now, with unnecessary anxiety for his aunt's comfort, he began to visit her at all hours of the day. I knew at once that he had come to her room, when I heard her shouting for Hemangini to bring in a glass of water. At first the girl would do what she was told; but later on she refused altogether.

Formerly, he could only enter the inner apartment during lunch and at night. But now, overly concerned about his aunt's comfort, he started visiting her at all hours of the day. I immediately knew he was in her room when I heard her calling for Hemangini to bring her a glass of water. At first, the girl would do as she was told, but later on, she completely refused.

Then the aunt would call, in an endearing voice: "Hemo! Hemo! Hemangini." But the girl would cling to me with an impulse of pity. A sense of dread and sadness would keep her silent. Sometimes she would shrink towards me like a hunted thing, who scarcely knew what was coming.

Then the aunt would call, in a sweet voice: "Hemo! Hemo! Hemangini." But the girl would cling to me out of a feeling of pity. A sense of fear and sadness would keep her quiet. Sometimes she would shrink towards me like a scared animal, barely aware of what was happening.

About this time my brother came down from Calcutta to visit me. I knew how keen his powers of observation were, and what a hard judge he was. I feared my husband would be put on his defence, and have to stand his trial before him. So I endeavoured to hide the true situation behind a mask of noisy cheerfulness. But I am afraid I overdid the part: it was unnatural for me.

Around this time, my brother came down from Calcutta to visit me. I knew how sharp his observational skills were and what a tough critic he could be. I worried my husband would have to defend himself and face scrutiny from him. So, I tried to conceal the reality of the situation with a facade of loud cheerfulness. But I’m afraid I went overboard: it just didn’t feel natural for me.

My husband began to fidget openly, and asked how long my brother was going to stay. At last his impatience became little short of insulting, and my brother had no help for it but to leave. Before going he placed his hand on my head, and kept it there for some time. I noticed that his hand shook, and a tear fell from his eyes, as he silently gave me his blessing.

My husband started to fidget and asked how long my brother was going to be there. Eventually, his impatience was almost rude, and my brother had no choice but to leave. Before he left, he put his hand on my head and kept it there for a while. I noticed his hand was shaking, and a tear rolled down his cheek as he silently blessed me.

I well remember that it was an evening in April, and a market-day. People who had come into the town were going back home from market. There was the feeling of an impending storm in the air; the smell of the wet earth and the moisture in the wind were all-pervading. I never keep a lighted lamp in my bedroom, when I am alone, lest my clothes should catch fire, or some accident happen. I sat on the floor in my dark room, and called upon the God of my blind world.

I clearly remember it was an evening in April and a market day. People who had come into town were heading home from the market. There was a sense that a storm was about to break; the smell of wet earth and the dampness in the wind were everywhere. I never keep a lit lamp in my bedroom when I'm alone, for fear my clothes might catch fire or something might go wrong. I sat on the floor in my dark room and called out to the God of my blind world.

"O my Lord," I cried, "Thy face is hidden. I cannot see. I am blind. I hold tight this broken rudder of a heart till my hands bleed. The waves have become too strong for me. How long wilt thou try me, my God, how long?"

"O my Lord," I cried, "Your face is hidden. I can’t see. I am blind. I hold tight to this broken rudder of a heart until my hands bleed. The waves have become too strong for me. How long will you test me, my God, how long?"

I kept my head prone upon the bedstead and began to sob. As I did so, I felt the bedstead move a little. The next moment Hemangini was by my side. She clung to my neck, and wiped my tears away silently. I do not know why she had been waiting that evening in the inner room, or why she had been lying alone there in the dusk. She asked me no question. She said no word. She simply placed her cool hand on my forehead, and kissed me, and departed.

I kept my head down on the bed and started to cry. As I did, I felt the bed shift a bit. The next moment, Hemangini was right beside me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and quietly wiped my tears away. I have no idea why she had been waiting in the inner room that evening or why she was lying there alone in the dim light. She didn’t ask me anything. She didn’t say a word. She just placed her cool hand on my forehead, kissed me, and left.

The next morning Hemangini said to her aunt in my presence: "If you want to stay on, you can. But I don't. I'm going away home with our family servant."

The next morning, Hemangini said to her aunt in my presence, "If you want to stay, you can. But I don’t. I’m going home with our family servant."

The aunt said there was no need for her to go alone, for she was going away also. Then smilingly and mincingly she brought out, from a plush case, a ring set with pearls.

The aunt said there was no need for her to go alone since she was leaving too. Then, smiling and being all delicate, she took out a ring set with pearls from a velvet case.

"Look, Hemo," said she, "what a beautiful ring my Abinash brought for you."

"Look, Hemo," she said, "what a beautiful ring my Abinash got for you."

Hemangini snatched the ring from her hand.

Hemangini grabbed the ring from her hand.

"Look, Aunt," she answered quickly, "just see how splendidly I aim." And she flung the ring into the tank outside the window.

"Look, Aunt," she said quickly, "just see how perfectly I'm aiming." And she tossed the ring into the tank outside the window.

The aunt, overwhelmed with alarm, vexation, and surprise, bristled like a hedgehog. She turned to me, and held me by the hand.

The aunt, filled with alarm, frustration, and surprise, bristled like a hedgehog. She turned to me and grabbed my hand.

"Kumo," she repeated again and again, "don't say a word about this childish freak to Abinash. He would be fearfully vexed."

"Kumo," she kept saying, "don’t mention this childish freak to Abinash. He would be really upset."

I assured her that she need not fear. Not a word would reach him about it from my lips.

I assured her that she didn’t need to worry. Not a word about it would come from me.

The next day before starting for home Hemangini embraced me, and said: "Dearest, keep me in mind; do not forget me."

The next day before heading home, Hemangini hugged me and said: "Darling, think of me; don't forget me."

I stroked her face over and over with my fingers, and said: "Sister, the blind have long memories."

I caressed her face repeatedly with my fingers and said, "Sister, the blind have long memories."

I drew her head towards me, and kissed her hair and her forehead. My world suddenly became grey. All the beauty and laughter and tender youth, which had nestled so close to me, vanished when Hemangini departed. I went groping about with arms outstretched, seeking to find out what was left in my deserted world.

I pulled her head close and kissed her hair and forehead. Suddenly, my world turned grey. All the beauty, laughter, and sweet youth that had been so close to me disappeared when Hemangini left. I wandered around with my arms outstretched, trying to figure out what was left in my empty world.

My husband came in later. He affected a great relief now that they were gone, but it was exaggerated and empty. He pretended that his aunt's visit had kept him away from work.

My husband came in later. He acted like he was really relieved now that they were gone, but it seemed forced and insincere. He pretended that his aunt's visit had kept him from working.

Hitherto there had been only the one barrier of blindness between me and my husband. Now another barrier was added,—this deliberate silence about Hemangini. He feigned utter indifference, but I knew he was having letters about her.

Until now, there was only the barrier of blindness between my husband and me. Now another barrier was added—this intentional silence about Hemangini. He acted completely indifferent, but I knew he was receiving letters about her.

It was early in May. My maid entered my room one morning, and asked me: "What is all this preparation going on at the landing on the river? Where is Master going?"

It was early May. One morning, my maid came into my room and asked me, "What's all this preparation happening at the river landing? Where is Master going?"

I knew there was something impending, but I said to the maid: "I can't say."

I sensed that something was about to happen, but I told the maid, "I can't say."

The maid did not dare to ask me any more questions. She sighed, and went away.

The maid didn’t dare to ask me any more questions. She sighed and walked away.

Late that night my husband came to me.

Late that night, my husband came to me.

"I have to visit a patient in the country," said he. "I shall have to start very early to-morrow morning, and I may have to be away for two or three days."

"I need to see a patient out in the country," he said. "I’ll have to leave really early tomorrow morning, and I might be gone for two or three days."

I got up from my bed. I stood before him, and cried aloud: "Why are you telling me lies?"

I got out of bed. I stood in front of him and shouted, "Why are you lying to me?"

My husband stammered out: "What—what lies have I told you?"

My husband stammered, "W-what lies have I told you?"

I said: "You are going to get married."

I said, "You're getting hitched."

He remained silent. For some moments there was no sound in the room. Then I broke the silence:

He stayed quiet. For a few moments, there was no sound in the room. Then I spoke up:

"Answer me," I cried. "Say, yes."

"Answer me," I yelled. "Just say, yes."

He answered, "Yes," like a feeble echo.

He replied, "Yes," like a weak echo.

I shouted out with a loud voice: "No! I shall never allow you. I shall save you from this great disaster, this dreadful sin. If I fail in this, then why am I your wife, and why did I ever worship my God?"

I yelled, "No! I won't let you do this. I will save you from this huge disaster, this terrible sin. If I can't do this, then why am I your wife, and why did I ever believe in my God?"

The room remained still as a stone. I dropped on the floor, and clung to my husband's knees.

The room was silent as a stone. I fell to the floor and clung to my husband’s knees.

"What have I done?" I asked. "Where have I been lacking? Tell me truly. Why do you want another wife?"

"What have I done?" I asked. "Where have I fallen short? Please be honest with me. Why do you want another wife?"

My husband said slowly: "I will tell you the truth. I am afraid of you. Your blindness has enclosed you in its fortress, and I have now no entrance. To me you are no longer a woman. You are awful as my God. I cannot live my every day life with you. I want a woman—just an ordinary woman—whom I can be free to chide and coax and pet and scold."

My husband said slowly, "I’m going to tell you the truth. I’m afraid of you. Your blindness has trapped you in a fortress, and I can’t get in anymore. To me, you’re no longer a woman. You're terrifying like my God. I can’t live my daily life with you. I want a woman—just an ordinary woman—who I can freely tease, comfort, and scold."

Oh, tear open my heart and see! What am I else but that,—just an ordinary woman? I am the same girl that I was when I was newly wed, a girl with all her need to believe, to confide, to worship.

Oh, tear open my heart and see! What else am I but that—just an ordinary woman? I'm the same girl I was when I was newlywed, a girl with all her need to believe, to trust, to idolize.

I do not recollect exactly the words that I uttered. I only remember that I said: "If I be a true wife, then, may God be my witness, you shall never do this wicked deed, you shall never break your oath. Before you commit such sacrilege, either I shall become a widow, or Hemangini shall die."

I can't remember the exact words I said. I only recall that I said: "If I'm a true wife, then, may God be my witness, you will never do this evil thing, you will never break your oath. Before you commit such a sin, either I will be a widow, or Hemangini will die."

Then I fell down on the floor in a swoon. When I came to myself, it was still dark. The birds were silent. My husband had gone.

Then I collapsed on the floor in a faint. When I came to, it was still dark. The birds were silent. My husband was gone.

All that day I sat at my worship in the sanctuary at the household shrine. In the evening a fierce storm, with thunder and lightning and rain, swept down upon the house and shook it. As I crouched before the shrine, I did not ask my God to save my husband from the storm, though he must have been at that time in peril on the river. I prayed that whatever might happen to me, my husband might be saved from this great sin.

All day I sat at my worship in the sanctuary at the home shrine. In the evening, a violent storm with thunder, lightning, and heavy rain hit the house and shook it. As I crouched before the shrine, I didn’t ask my God to save my husband from the storm, even though he was likely in danger on the river. I prayed that no matter what happened to me, my husband would be spared from this terrible sin.

Night passed. The whole of the next day I kept my seat at worship. When it was evening there was the noise of shaking and beating at the door. When the door was broken open, they found me lying unconscious on the ground, and carried me to my room.

Night passed. The entire next day, I remained in my seat during worship. In the evening, there was a loud banging at the door. When they broke it open, they found me lying unconscious on the floor and took me back to my room.

When I came to myself at last, I heard some one whispering in my ear: "Sister."

When I finally came to my senses, I heard someone whispering in my ear: "Sister."

I found that I was lying in my room with my head on Hemangini's lap. When my head moved, I heard her dress rustle. It was the sound of bridal silk.

I discovered that I was lying in my room with my head in Hemangini's lap. When I shifted my head, I heard her dress rustle. It was the sound of bridal silk.

O my God, my God! My prayer has gone unheeded! My husband has fallen!

O my God, my God! My prayer has been ignored! My husband has fallen!

Hemangini bent her head low, and said in a sweet whisper: "Sister, dearest, I have come to ask your blessing on our marriage."

Hemangini lowered her head and said in a soft whisper, "Sister, my dear, I’ve come to ask for your blessing on our marriage."

At first my whole body stiffened like the trunk of a tree that has been struck by lightning. Then I sat up, and said, painfully, forcing myself to speak the words: "Why should I not bless you? You have done no wrong."

At first, my whole body tensed up like a tree trunk hit by lightning. Then I sat up and said, struggling to get the words out, "Why shouldn't I bless you? You haven't done anything wrong."

Hemangini laughed her merry laugh.

Hemangini laughed her joyful laugh.

"Wrong!" said she. "When you married it was right; and when I marry, you call it wrong!"

"Wrong!" she said. "It was fine when you got married, but when I get married, you say it's wrong!"

I tried to smile in answer to her laughter. I said in my mind: "My prayer is not the final thing in this world. His will is all. Let the blows descend upon my head; but may they leave my faith and hope in God untouched."

I tried to smile back at her laughter. I thought to myself, "My prayer isn't the most important thing in this world. His will matters most. Let the hardships come my way; just let them leave my faith and hope in God unharmed."

Hemangini bowed to me, and touched my feet. "May you be happy," said I, blessing her, "and enjoy unbroken prosperity."

Hemangini bowed to me and touched my feet. "May you be happy," I said, blessing her, "and enjoy continuous prosperity."

Hemangini was still unsatisfied.

Hemangini was still not happy.

"Dearest sister," she said, "a blessing for me is not enough. You must make our happiness complete. You must, with those saintly hands of yours, accept into your home my husband also. Let me bring him to you."

"Dear sister," she said, "a blessing from you isn’t enough. You need to make our happiness whole. You must, with your kind hands, welcome my husband into your home as well. Let me bring him to you."

I said: "Yes, bring him to me."

I said, "Yeah, bring him to me."

A few moments later I heard a familiar footstep, and the question, "Kumo, how are you?"

A few moments later, I heard a familiar footstep and the question, "Kumo, how are you?"

I started up, and bowed to the ground, and cried: "Dada!"

I jumped up, bowed to the ground, and shouted, "Dad!"

Hemangini burst out laughing.

Hemangini laughed out loud.

"You still call him elder brother?" she asked. "What nonsense! Call him younger brother now, and pull his ears and cease him, for he has married me, your younger sister."

"You still call him elder brother?" she asked. "What nonsense! Call him younger brother now, and tug on his ears to set him straight, because he has married me, your younger sister."

Then I understood. My husband had been saved from that great sin. He had not fallen.

Then I got it. My husband had been spared from that major sin. He hadn’t succumbed.

I knew my Dada had determined never to marry. And, since my mother had died, there was no sacred wish of hers to implore him to wedlock. But I, his sister, by my sore need bad brought it to pass. He had married for my sake.

I knew my dad had decided never to get married. And, since my mom had died, there wasn’t any heartfelt wish of hers to ask him to marry. But I, his sister, out of my desperate need, made it happen. He had married for my sake.

Tears of joy gushed from my eyes, and poured down my cheeks. I tried, but I could not stop them. Dada slowly passed his fingers through my hair. Hemangini clung to me, and went on laughing.

Tears of joy streamed down my face and soaked my cheeks. I tried, but I couldn't hide them. Dada gently ran his fingers through my hair. Hemangini held on to me and kept laughing.

I was lying awake in my bed for the best part of the night, waiting with straining anxiety for my husband's return. I could not imagine how he would bear the shock of shame and disappointment.

I was lying awake in bed for most of the night, filled with anxious anticipation for my husband's return. I couldn’t picture how he would handle the shock of shame and disappointment.

When it was long past the hour of midnight, slowly my door opened. I sat up on my bed, and listened. They were the footsteps of my husband. My heart began to beat wildly. He came up to my bed, held my band in his.

When it was well past midnight, my door creaked open slowly. I sat up in bed and listened. It was my husband’s footsteps. My heart started to race. He walked over to my bed and took my hand in his.

"Your Dada," said he, "has saved me from destruction. I was being dragged down and down by a moments madness. An infatuation had seized me, from which I seemed unable to escape. God alone knows what a load I was carrying on that day when I entered the boat. The storm came down on river, and covered the sky. In the midst of all fears I had a secret wish in my heart to be drowned, and so disentangle my life from the knot which I had tied it. I reached Mathurganj. There I heard the news which set me free. Your brother had married Hemangini. I cannot tell you with what joy and shame I heard it. I hastened on board the boat again. In that moment of self-revelation I knew that I could have no happiness except with you. You are a Goddess."

"Your Dada," he said, "has saved me from destruction. I was being pulled down by a moment of madness. I became infatuated, and I felt like I couldn't escape it. Only God knows the burden I was carrying that day when I got into the boat. A storm swept down on the river and darkened the sky. Amid all my fears, I secretly wished to drown, hoping to untie the knot I had made of my life. I reached Mathurganj and heard the news that set me free: your brother had married Hemangini. I can't tell you how joyful and ashamed I felt when I heard it. I quickly got back on the boat. In that moment of self-discovery, I realized that I could find no happiness except with you. You are a goddess."

I laughed and cried at the same time, and said: "No, no, no! I am not going to be a Goddess any longer I am simply your own little wife. I am an ordinary woman."

I laughed and cried at the same time and said, "No, no, no! I'm not going to be a Goddess anymore; I'm just your little wife. I'm an ordinary woman."

"Dearest," he replied, "I have also something I want to say to you. Never again put me to shame by calling me your God."

"Dear," he replied, "I have something I need to say to you too. Don't ever embarrass me again by calling me your God."

On the next day the little town became joyous with sound of conch shells. But nobody made any reference to that night of madness, when all was so nearly lost.

The next day, the small town was filled with the joyful sound of conch shells. But no one mentioned that night of chaos, when everything was so close to being lost.





THE BABUS OF NAYANJORE

I

Once upon a time the Babus of Nayanjore were famous landholders. They were noted for their princely extravagance. They would tear off the rough border of their Dacca muslin, because it rubbed against their skin. They could spend many thousands of rupees over the wedding of a kitten. On a certain grand occasion it is alleged that in order to turn night into day they lighted numberless lamps and showered silver threads from the sky to imitate sunlight. Those were the days before the flood. The flood came. The line of succession among these old-world Babus, with their lordly habits, could not continue for long. Like a lamp with too many wicks burning, the oil flared away quickly, and the light went out.

Once upon a time, the Babus of Nayanjore were well-known landowners. They were famous for their lavish spending. They would tear off the uneven edges of their Dacca muslin because it irritated their skin. They could easily spend thousands of rupees on the wedding of a kitten. At one grand event, it’s said they lit countless lamps and showered silver threads from the sky to simulate sunlight. Those were the days before the flood. The flood came. The line of succession among these old-fashioned Babus, with their extravagant ways, couldn’t last long. Like a lamp with too many wicks, the oil burned out quickly, and the light went out.

Kailas Babu, our neighbour, is the last relic of this extinct magnificence. Before he grew up, his family had very nearly reached its lowest ebb. When his father died, there was one dazzling outburst of funeral extravagance, and then insolvency. The property was sold to liquidate the debt. What little ready money was left over was altogether insufficient to keep up the past ancestral splendours.

Kailas Babu, our neighbor, is the last remnant of this lost grandeur. Before he grew up, his family had nearly hit rock bottom. When his father died, there was one grand display of funeral opulence, and then bankruptcy followed. The property was sold to pay off the debt. The little money that remained was not enough to maintain the former family glory.

Kailas Babu left Nayanjore, and came to Calcutta. His son did not remain long in this world of faded glory. He died, leaving behind him an only daughter.

Kailas Babu left Nayanjore and went to Calcutta. His son didn't stay long in this world of faded glory. He passed away, leaving behind just one daughter.

In Calcutta we are Kailas Baba's neighbours. Curiously enough our own family history is just the opposite to his. My father got his money by his own exertions, and prided himself on never spending a penny more than was needed. His clothes were those of a working man, and his hands also. He never had any inclination to earn the title of Baba by extravagant display, and I myself his only son, owe him gratitude for that. He gave me the very best education, and I was able to make my way in the world. I am not ashamed of the fact that I am a self-made man. Crisp bank-notes in my safe are dearer to me than a long pedigree in an empty family chest.

In Calcutta, we live next to Kailas Baba. Interestingly, our family history is completely different from his. My father earned his money through hard work and took pride in never spending a cent more than necessary. He dressed like a working man and his hands showed it. He never tried to gain the title of Baba through flashy displays, and I, his only son, am grateful for that. He provided me with a top-notch education, which helped me succeed in life. I'm not ashamed to be a self-made man. Crisp banknotes in my safe mean more to me than a long family history in an empty chest.

I believe this was why I disliked seeing Kailas Baba drawing his heavy cheques on the public credit from the bankrupt bank of his ancient Babu reputation I used to fancy that he looked down on me, because my father had earned money with his own hands.

I think that's why I hated watching Kailas Baba cash his big checks from the failed account of his old Babu reputation. I used to imagine that he looked down on me because my dad had earned his money through hard work.

I ought to have noticed that no one showed any vexation towards Kailas Babu except myself. Indeed it would have been difficult to find an old man who did less harm than he. He was always ready with his kindly little acts of courtesy in times of sorrow and joy. He would join in all the ceremonies and religious observances of his neighbours. His familiar smile would greet young and old alike. His politeness in asking details about domestic affairs was untiring. The friends who met him in the street were perforce ready to be button-holed, while a long string of questions of this kind followed one another from his lips:

I should have realized that no one showed any annoyance toward Kailas Babu except me. In fact, it would have been hard to find an old man who caused less trouble than he did. He was always prepared with his kind little gestures of courtesy during both sad and happy times. He participated in all the ceremonies and religious observances of his neighbors. His familiar smile welcomed both young and old. His politeness in asking about personal matters was endless. Friends who encountered him in the street were inevitably ready to be cornered, while a continuous stream of questions like these followed one after another from his lips:

"My dear friend, I am delighted to see you. Are quite well? How is Shashi? and Dada—is he all right? Do you know, I've only just heard that Madhu's son has got fever. How is he? Have you heard? And Hari Charan Babu—I've not seen him for a long time—I hope he is not ill. What's the matter with Rakkhal? And, er—er, how are the ladies of your family?"

"My dear friend, it’s great to see you. Are you doing well? How's Shashi? And Dada—is he okay? You won't believe it, but I just heard that Madhu's son has a fever. How is he? Have you heard anything? And what about Hari Charan Babu—I haven’t seen him in a while—I hope he’s not sick. What’s wrong with Rakkhal? And, um, how are the women in your family?"

Kailas Balm was spotlessly neat in his dress on all occasions, though his supply of clothes was sorely limited. Every day he used to air his shirts and vests and coats and trousers carefully, and put them out in the sun, along with his bed-quilt, his pillowcase, and the small carpet on which he always sat. After airing them he would shake them, and brush them, and put them on the rock. His little bits of furniture made his small room decent, and hinted that there was more in reserve if needed. Very often, for want of a servant, he would shut up his house for a while. Then he would iron out his shirts and linen with his own hands, and do other little menial tasks. After this he would open his door and receive his friends again.

Kailas Balm was always impeccably dressed, even though he didn't have many clothes. Every day, he would air out his shirts, vests, coats, and trousers, laying them out in the sun along with his quilt, pillowcase, and the small rug where he always sat. After airing them, he would shake and brush them before placing them on the rock. His few pieces of furniture kept his small room neat and suggested he had more hidden away if necessary. Often, since he didn't have a servant, he would close up his house for a bit. Then he would iron his shirts and linens himself and take care of other small chores. After that, he would open his door and welcome back his friends.

Though Kailas Balm, as I have said, had lost all his landed property, he had still same family heirlooms left. There was a silver cruet for sprinkling scented water, a filigree box for otto-of-roses, a small gold salver, a costly ancient shawl, and the old-fashioned ceremonial dress and ancestral turban. These he had rescued with the greatest difficulty from the money-lenders' clutches. On every suitable occasion he would bring them out in state, and thus try to save the world-famed dignity of the Babus of Nayanjore. At heart the most modest of men, in his daily speech he regarded it as a sacred duty, owed to his rank, to give free play to his family pride. His friends would encourage this trait in his character with kindly good-humour, and it gave them great amusement.

Though Kailas Balm, as I mentioned, had lost all his property, he still had some family heirlooms left. There was a silver cruet for sprinkling scented water, a filigree box for rose oil, a small gold tray, a valuable ancient shawl, and the old ceremonial dress along with an ancestral turban. He had rescued these with great difficulty from the moneylenders' grasp. On every suitable occasion, he would proudly display them, trying to maintain the world-famous dignity of the Babus of Nayanjore. At heart, he was one of the most modest men, yet in his daily conversations, he felt it was his duty, due to his status, to embrace his family pride. His friends would playfully encourage this aspect of his personality, finding it very entertaining.

The neighbourhood soon learnt to call him their Thakur Dada (Grandfather). They would flock to his house, and sit with him for hours together. To prevent his incurring any expense, one or other of his friends would bring him tobacco, and say: "Thakur Dada, this morning some tobacco was sent to me from Gaya. Do take it, and see how you like it."

The neighborhood quickly started calling him their Thakur Dada (Grandfather). They would gather at his house and spend hours with him. To keep him from having to spend any money, one of his friends would bring him tobacco and say, "Thakur Dada, I got some tobacco sent to me from Gaya this morning. Please take it and see what you think."

Thakur Dada would take it, and say it was excellent. He would then go on to tell of a certain exquisite tobacco which they once smoked in the old days at Nayanjore at the cost of a guinea an ounce.

Thakur Dada would take it and say it was great. He would then go on to talk about a certain amazing tobacco that they once smoked back in the day at Nayanjore, which cost a guinea an ounce.

"I wonder," he used to say, "I wonder if any one would like to try it now. I have some left, and can get it at once."

"I wonder," he would say, "I wonder if anyone would like to try it now. I still have some left and can get it right away."

Every one knew, that, if they asked for it, then somehow or other the key of the cupboard would be missing; or else Ganesh, his old family servant, had put it away somewhere.

Everyone knew that if they asked for it, somehow the key to the cupboard would be missing, or Ganesh, their old family servant, had hidden it away somewhere.

"You never can be sure," he would add, "where things go to when servants are about. Now, this Ganesh of mine,—I can't tell you what a fool he is, but I haven't the heart to dismiss him."

"You can never be sure," he would say, "where things end up when there are servants around. Now, this Ganesh of mine—I can’t even describe how foolish he is, but I just can’t bring myself to fire him."

Ganesh, for the credit of the family, was quite ready to bear all the blame without a word.

Ganesh, for the family's reputation, was totally willing to take all the blame without saying a word.

One of the company usually said at this point: "Never mind, Thakur Dada. Please don't trouble to look for it. This tobacco we're smoking will do quite well. The other would be too strong."

One of the company usually said at this point: "Don't worry, Thakur Dada. Please don't bother looking for it. This tobacco we're smoking is fine. The other one would be too strong."

Then Thakur Dada would be relieved, and settle down again, and the talk would go on.

Then Thakur Dada would relax, settle back in, and the conversation would continue.

When his guests got up to go away, Thakur Dada would accompany them to the door, and say to them on the door-step: "Oh, by the way, when are you all coming to dine with me?"

When his guests stood up to leave, Thakur Dada would walk them to the door and say to them on the doorstep, "Oh, by the way, when are you all coming to have dinner with me?"

One or other of us would answer: "Not just yet, Thakur Dada, not just yet. We'll fix a day later."

One of us would reply, "Not right now, Thakur Dada, not right now. We'll set a date later."

"Quite right," he would answer. "Quite right. We had much better wait till the rains come. It's too hot now. And a grand rich dinner such as I should want to give you would upset us in weather like this."

"Absolutely," he would reply. "Absolutely. We should definitely wait until the rains come. It's too hot right now. A fancy, luxurious dinner that I want to give you would just be uncomfortable in weather like this."

But when the rains did come, every one careful not to remind him of his promise. If the subject was brought up, some friend would suggest gently that it was very inconvenient to get about when the rains were so severe, that it would be much better to wait till they were over. And so the game went on.

But when the rains finally came, everyone was careful not to remind him of his promise. If someone brought it up, a friend would gently suggest that it was really inconvenient to get around when the rains were so intense, and that it would be much better to wait until they were over. And so the game continued.

His poor lodging was much too small for his position, and we used to condole with him about it. His friends would assure him they quite understood his difficulties: it was next to impossible to get a decent house in Calcutta. Indeed, they had all been looking out for years for a house to suit him, but, I need hardly add, no friend had been foolish enough to find one. Thakur Dada used to say, after a long sigh of resignation: "Well, well, I suppose I shall have to put up with this house after all." Then he would add with a genial smile: "But, you know, I could never bear to be away from my friends. I must be near you. That really compensates for everything."

His small apartment wasn't nearly big enough for his status, and we often expressed our sympathy for him about it. His friends would assure him they completely understood his challenges: it was practically impossible to find a decent place in Calcutta. In fact, they had all been searching for years for a suitable house for him, but, I hardly need to say, no friend had been silly enough to find one. Thakur Dada would often say, after a long sigh of resignation: "Well, I guess I’ll just have to live with this place after all." Then he'd add with a warm smile: "But, you know, I could never stand being away from my friends. I need to be close to you. That really makes up for everything."

Somehow I felt all this very deeply indeed. I suppose the real reason was, that when a man is young stupidity appears to him the worst of crimes. Kailas Babu was not really stupid. In ordinary business matters every one was ready to consult him.

Somehow, I really felt all of this deeply. I guess the main reason was that when you're young, stupidity seems like the worst crime. Kailas Babu wasn’t actually stupid. In everyday business matters, everyone turned to him for advice.

But with regard to Nayanjore his utterances were certainly void of common sense. Because, out of amused affection for him, no one contradicted his impossible statements, he refused to keep them in bounds. When people recounted in his hearing the glorious history of Nayanjore with absurd exaggerations he would accept all they said with the utmost gravity, and never doubted, even in his dreams, that any one could disbelieve it.

But when it came to Nayanjore, his comments were definitely lacking in common sense. Since no one contradicted his outrageous claims out of fondness for him, he refused to rein them in. When people shared the exaggerated tales of Nayanjore's glorious history in his presence, he would take everything they said very seriously and never questioned, even in his dreams, that anyone could doubt it.

II

II

When I sit down and try to analyse the thoughts and feelings that I had towards Kailas Babu I see that there was a still deeper reason for my dislike. I will now explain.

When I sit down and try to analyze the thoughts and feelings I had toward Kailas Babu, I realize there was an even deeper reason for my dislike. Let me explain.

Though I am the son of a rich man, and might have wasted time at college, my industry was such that I took my M.A. degree in Calcutta University when quite young. My moral character was flawless. In addition, my outward appearance was so handsome, that if I were to call myself beautiful, it might be thought a mark of self-estimation, but could not be considered an untruth.

Though I’m the son of a wealthy man and could have easily squandered my time at college, I worked hard and earned my M.A. degree from Calcutta University while still quite young. My moral character was impeccable. Plus, I was so good-looking that if I called myself beautiful, it might be seen as vain, but it wouldn’t be a lie.

There could be no question that among the young men of Bengal I was
regarded by parents generally as a very eligible match. I was myself
quite clear on the point, and had determined to obtain my full value in
the marriage market. When I pictured my choice, I had before my mind's
eye a wealthy father's only daughter, extremely beautiful and highly
educated. Proposals came pouring in to me from far and near; large sums
in cash were offered. I weighed these offers with rigid impartiality, in
the delicate scales of my own estimation. But there was no one fit to be
my partner. I became convinced, with the poet Bhabavuti, that

     In this worlds endless time and boundless space
     One may be born at last to match my sovereign grace.
There was no doubt that among the young men in Bengal, parents saw me as a very desirable match. I was completely aware of this and had decided to get my full worth in the marriage market. When I thought about my ideal partner, I imagined the only daughter of a wealthy father, extremely beautiful and well-educated. Proposals flooded in from all over; large sums of money were offered. I evaluated these offers with strict fairness, weighing them according to my own standards. But no one seemed right for me. I became convinced, like the poet Bhabavuti, that

     In this world's endless time and boundless space
     One may be born at last to match my sovereign grace.

But in this puny modern age, and this contracted space of modern Bengal, it was doubtful if the peerless creature existed as yet.

But in this tiny modern era, and this limited area of modern Bengal, it was uncertain if the unmatched being still existed.

Meanwhile my praises were sung in many tunes, and in different metres, by designing parents.

Meanwhile, my praises were sung in many songs and in different rhythms by proud parents.

Whether I was pleased with their daughters or not, this worship which they offered was never unpleasing. I used to regard it as my proper due, because I was so good. We are told that when the gods withhold their boons from mortals they still expect their worshippers to pay them fervent honour, and are angry if it is withheld. I had that divine expectance strongly developed in myself.

Whether I liked their daughters or not, the worship they offered was always satisfying. I thought it was my rightful due because I was so good. We’re told that when the gods refuse to grant favors to mortals, they still expect their worshippers to show them sincere honor, and they get angry if it’s not given. I had that divine expectation strongly developed within me.

I have already mentioned that Thakur Dada had an only grand-daughter. I had seen her many times, but had never mistaken her for beautiful. No thought had ever entered my mind that she would be a possible partner for myself. All the same, it seemed quite certain to me that some day ox other Kailas Babu would offer her, with all due worship, as an oblation at my shrine. Indeed-this was the secret of my dislike-I was thoroughly annoyed that he had not done it already.

I’ve already mentioned that Thakur Dada had only one granddaughter. I had seen her many times, but I never considered her beautiful. The thought had never crossed my mind that she could be a potential partner for me. Still, it seemed pretty clear to me that someday Kailas Babu would present her, with all the proper respect, as an offering at my shrine. In fact, this was the reason for my dislike—I was really frustrated that he hadn’t done it yet.

I heard he had told his friends that the Babus of Nayanjore never craved a boon. Even if the girl remained unmarried, he would not break the family tradition. It was this arrogance of his that made me angry. My indignation smouldered for some time. But I remained perfectly silent, and bore it with the utmost patience, because I was so good.

I heard he told his friends that the Babus of Nayanjore never asked for favors. Even if the girl stayed single, he wouldn’t break the family tradition. It was his arrogance that made me angry. My frustration simmered for a while. But I stayed completely silent and endured it with total patience because I was so good.

As lightning accompanies thunder, so in my character a flash of humour was mingled with the mutterings of my wrath. It was, of course, impossible for me to punish the old man merely to give vent to my rage; and for a long time I did nothing at all. But suddenly one day such an amusing plan came into my head, that I could not resist the temptation of carrying it into effect.

As lightning comes with thunder, in my personality, a spark of humor mixed with the grumbles of my anger. It was, of course, unthinkable for me to take it out on the old man just to release my frustration; for a long time, I didn’t do anything at all. But suddenly one day, an idea that was so funny popped into my head that I couldn’t resist the urge to make it happen.

I have already said that many of Kailas Babu's friends used to flatter the old man's vanity to the full. One, who was a retired Government servant, had told him that whenever he saw the Chota Lord Sahib he always asked for the latest news about the Babus of Nayanjore, and the Chota Lard had been heard to say that in all Bengal the only really respectable families were those of the Maharaja of Burdwan and the Babus of Nayanjore. When this monstrous falsehood was told to Kailas Balm he was extremely gratified, and often repeated the story. And wherever after that he met this Government servant in company he would ask, along with other questions:

I’ve already mentioned that many of Kailas Babu's friends used to completely indulge the old man's vanity. One friend, a retired government employee, told him that whenever he saw the Chota Lord Sahib, he always asked for the latest news about the Babus of Nayanjore. The Chota Lord had been heard saying that in all of Bengal, the only truly respectable families were those of the Maharaja of Burdwan and the Babus of Nayanjore. When this outrageous lie was shared with Kailas Babu, he was very pleased and often retold the story. So, whenever he met this government employee in company, he would ask, along with other questions:

"Oh! er—by the way, how is the Chota Lord Sahib? Quite well, did you say? Ah, yes, I am so delighted to hear it I And the dear Mem Sahib, is she quite well too? Ah, yes! and the little children-are they quite well also? Ah, yes I that's very goad news! Be sure and give them my compliments when you see them."

"Oh! By the way, how is the Chota Lord Sahib? Quite well, did you say? Ah, yes, I'm so happy to hear that! And the dear Mem Sahib, is she doing well too? Ah, yes! And the little children—are they doing well as well? Ah, yes! That's really great news! Make sure to give them my regards when you see them."

Kailas Balm would constantly express his intention of going some day and paying a visit to the Sahib.

Kailas Balm would always talk about how he planned to go someday and visit the Sahib.

But it may be taken for granted that many Chota Lords and Burro Lords also would come and go, and much water would pass down the Hoogly, before the family coach of Nayanjore would be furnished up to pay a visit to Government House.

But it's safe to assume that many Chota Lords and Burro Lords would come and go, and a lot of time would pass on the Hoogly before the family coach of Nayanjore would be ready to visit Government House.

One day I took Kailas Babu aside, and told him in a whisper: "Thakur Dada, I was at the Levee yesterday, and the Chota Lord happened to mention the Babes of Nayanjore. I told him that Kailas Balm had come to town. Do you know, he was terribly hurt because you hadn't called. He told me he was going to put etiquette on one side, and pay you a private visit himself this very afternoon."

One day I pulled Kailas Babu to the side and whispered, "Thakur Dada, I was at the Levee yesterday, and the Chota Lord happened to bring up the Babes of Nayanjore. I mentioned that Kailas Balm was in town. You know, he was really upset that you hadn't called. He said he was going to set etiquette aside and come to visit you privately this afternoon."

Anybody else could have seen through this plot of mine in a moment. And, if it had been directed against another person, Kailas Balm would have understood the joke. But after all he had heard from his friend the Government servant, and after all his own exaggerations, a visit from the Lieutenant-Governor seemed the most natural thing in the world. He became highly nervous and excited at my news. Each detail of the coming visit exercised him greatly—most of all his own ignorance of English. How on earth was that difficulty to be met? I told him there was no difficulty at all: it was aristocratic not to know English: and, besides, the Lieutenant-Governor always brought an interpreter with him, and he had expressly mentioned that this visit was to be private.

Anyone else would have seen through my plan in no time. And if it had been aimed at someone else, Kailas Balm would have gotten the joke. But with everything he had heard from his friend in the government and all his own exaggerations, a visit from the Lieutenant-Governor seemed completely normal to him. He became very nervous and excited at my news. Each detail of the upcoming visit worried him a lot—especially his own lack of English skills. How on earth was he going to deal with that? I told him there was no problem at all: it was actually classy not to know English. Plus, the Lieutenant-Governor always brought an interpreter with him, and he had specifically mentioned that this visit was supposed to be private.

About mid-day, when most of our neighbours are at work, and the rest are asleep, a carriage and pair stopped before the lodging of Kailas Babu. Two flunkeys in livery came up the stairs, and announced in a loud voice, "The Chota Lord Sahib hoe arrived." Kailas Babu was ready, waiting for him, in his old-fashioned ceremonial robes and ancestral turban, and Ganesh was by his side, dressed in his master's best suit of clothes for the occasion. When the Chota Lord Sahib was announced, Kailas Balm ran panting and puffing and trembling to the door, and led in a friend of mine, in disguise, with repeated salaams, bowing low at each step, and walking backward as best he could. He had his old family shawl spread over a hard wooden chair, and he asked the Lord Sahib to be seated. He then made a high flown speech in Urdu, the ancient Court language of the Sahibs, and presented on the golden salver a string of gold mohurs, the last relics of his broken fortune. The old family servant Ganesh, with an expression of awe bordering on terror, stood behind with the scent-sprinkler, drenching the Lord Sahib, touching him gingerly from time to time with the otto-of-roses from the filigree box.

Around midday, when most of our neighbors are at work and the others are asleep, a carriage with two horses stopped in front of Kailas Babu's place. Two attendants in uniforms came up the stairs and announced loudly, "The Chota Lord Sahib has arrived." Kailas Babu was ready, waiting for him in his traditional ceremonial robes and ancestral turban, with Ganesh at his side, dressed in his best suit for the occasion. When the Chota Lord Sahib was announced, Kailas Babu rushed to the door, panting and trembling, and welcomed a disguised friend of mine with deep bows, trying to walk backward as best as he could. He had his old family shawl laid over a hard wooden chair and invited the Lord Sahib to sit down. He then delivered an elaborate speech in Urdu, the traditional court language of the Sahibs, and presented a string of gold mohurs on a golden tray, the last remnants of his faded wealth. The old family servant Ganesh, looking both awed and terrified, stood behind with a scent sprayer, dousing the Lord Sahib and occasionally touching him gently with rose oil from the filigree box.

Kailas Babu repeatedly expressed his regret at not being able to receive His Honour Bahadur with all the ancestral magnificence of his own family estate at Nayanjore. There he could have welcomed him properly with due ceremonial. But in Calcutta he was a mere stranger and sojourner-in fact a fish out of water.

Kailas Babu often said he regretted not being able to welcome His Honour Bahadur with the full grandeur of his family estate in Nayanjore. There, he could have greeted him properly with the right ceremonies. But in Calcutta, he was just a stranger and a visitor—essentially a fish out of water.

My friend, with his tall silk hat on, very gravely nodded. I need hardly say that according to English custom the hat ought to have been removed inside the room. But my friend did not dare to take it off for fear of detection; and Kailas Balm and his old servant Ganesh were sublimely unconscious of the breach of etiquette.

My friend, wearing his tall silk hat, nodded seriously. I hardly need to mention that, according to English custom, he should have taken it off inside the room. But my friend didn’t dare to remove it out of fear of being noticed; meanwhile, Kailas Balm and his old servant Ganesh were completely unaware of the etiquette mistake.

After a ten minutes' interview, which consisted chiefly of nodding the head, my friend rose to his feet to depart. The two flunkeys in livery, as had been planned beforehand, carried off in state the string of gold mohurs, the gold salver, the old ancestral shawl, the silver scent-sprinkler, and the otto-of-roses filigree box; they placed them ceremoniously in the carriage. Kailas Babu regarded this as the usual habit of Chota Lard Sahibs.

After a ten-minute interview, which mostly involved nodding, my friend got up to leave. The two liveried attendants, as planned, proudly carried away the string of gold mohurs, the gold tray, the old family shawl, the silver perfume sprayer, and the delicate rose oil box; they placed them carefully in the carriage. Kailas Babu saw this as the typical behavior of the little rich kids.

I was watching all the while from the next room. My sides were aching with suppressed laughter. When I could hold myself in no longer, I rushed into a further room, suddenly to discover, in a corner, a young girl sobbing as if her heart would break. When she saw my uproarious laughter she stood upright in passion, flashing the lightning of her big dark eyes in mine, and said with a tear-choked voice:

I was watching the whole time from the next room. My sides were hurting from trying not to laugh. When I couldn't hold it in any longer, I rushed into another room and suddenly found a young girl sobbing in a corner as if her heart would break. When she saw me laughing so hard, she stood up, her big dark eyes flashing with intensity, and said in a voice choked with tears:

"Tell me! What harm has my grandfather done to you? Why have you come to deceive him? Why have you come here? Why—"

"Tell me! What harm has my grandfather done to you? Why have you come to trick him? Why are you here? Why—"

She could say no more. She covered her face with her hands, and broke into sobs.

She couldn't say anything else. She covered her face with her hands and started crying.

My laughter vanished in a moment. It had never occurred to me that there was anything but a supremely funny joke in this act of mine, and here I discovered that I had given the cruelest pain to this tenderest little heart. All the ugliness of my cruelty rose up to condemn me. I slunk out of the room in silence, like a kicked dog.

My laughter disappeared in an instant. It never crossed my mind that there was anything other than a hilarious joke in what I was doing, and then I realized that I had caused the deepest hurt to this delicate little heart. All the harshness of my cruelty came back to judge me. I crept out of the room quietly, like a dog that had been kicked.

Hitherto I had only looked upon Kusum, the grand-daughter of Kailas Babu, as a somewhat worthless commodity in the marriage market, waiting in vain to attract a husband. But now I found, with a shock of surprise, that in the corner of that room a human heart was beating.

Until now, I had only seen Kusum, the granddaughter of Kailas Babu, as a somewhat worthless option in the marriage market, waiting in vain to find a husband. But now I discovered, with a jolt of surprise, that in the corner of that room, a human heart was beating.

The whole night through I had very little sleep. My mind was in a tumult. On the next day, very early in the morning, I took all those stolen goods back to Kailas Babe's lodgings, wishing to hand them over in secret to the servant Ganesh. I waited outside the door, and, not finding any one, went upstairs to Kailas Babu's room. I heard from the passage Kusum asking her grandfather in the most winning voice: "Dada, dearest, do tell me all that the Chota Lord Sahib said to you yesterday. Don't leave out a single word. I am dying to hear it all over again."

I barely slept the whole night. My mind was racing. The next day, very early in the morning, I took all those stolen items back to Kailas Babe's place, hoping to hand them over quietly to the servant Ganesh. I waited outside the door and, not finding anyone, went upstairs to Kailas Babu's room. I heard Kusum in the hallway asking her grandfather in the sweetest voice: "Dada, darling, please tell me everything the Chota Lord Sahib said to you yesterday. Don’t leave out a single word. I can’t wait to hear it all again."

And Dada needed no encouragement. His face beamed over with pride as he related all manner of praises, which the Lard Sahib had been good enough to utter concerning the ancient families of Nayanjore. The girl was seated before him, looking up into his face, and listening with rapt attention. She was determined, out of love for the old man, to play her part to the full.

And Dada didn't need any encouragement. His face lit up with pride as he shared all the praises the Lard Sahib had kindly given about the ancient families of Nayanjore. The girl sat in front of him, looking up at his face and listening intently. Out of love for the old man, she was determined to fully engage in her part.

My heart was deeply touched, and tears came to my eyes. I stood there in silence in the passage, while Thakur Dada finished all his embellishments of the Chota Lord Sahib's wonderful visit. When he left the room at last, I took the stolen goods and laid them at the feet of the girl and came away without a word.

My heart was deeply moved, and tears filled my eyes. I stood there quietly in the hallway while Thakur Dada wrapped up all his praises about the Chota Lord Sahib's amazing visit. When he finally left the room, I took the stolen items and laid them at the girl's feet and walked away without saying a word.

Later in the day I called again to see Kailas Balm himself. According to our ugly modern custom, I had been in the habit of making no greeting at all to this old man when I came into the room. But on this day I made a low bow, and touched his feet. I am convinced the old man thought that the coming of the Chota Lord Sahib to his house was the cause of my new politeness. He was highly gratified by it, and an air of benign severity shone from his eyes. His friends had flocked in, and he had already begun to tell again at full length the story of the Lieutenant-Governor's visit with still further adornments of a most fantastic kind. The interview was already becoming an epic, both in quality and in length.

Later in the day, I called again to see Kailas Balm himself. Following our unpleasant modern custom, I usually walked into the room without greeting this old man at all. But on this day, I made a deep bow and touched his feet. I’m pretty sure the old man thought my newfound politeness was because the Chota Lord Sahib was visiting him. He was really pleased by it, and a look of kind seriousness lit up his eyes. His friends had gathered around, and he had already started retelling the story of the Lieutenant-Governor's visit, embellishing it with even wilder details. The conversation was quickly turning into an epic, both in content and length.

When the other visitors had taken their leave, I made my proposal to the old man in a humble manner. I told him that, "though I could never for a moment hope to be worthy of marriage connection with such an illustrious family, yet... etc. etc."

When the other visitors had left, I made my proposal to the old man respectfully. I told him that, "while I could never imagine being worthy of a marriage connection with such a distinguished family, yet... etc. etc."

When I made clear my proposal of marriage, the old man embraced me, and broke out in a tumult of joy: "I am a poor man, and could never have expected such great good fortune."

When I revealed my marriage proposal, the old man hugged me and burst into a flurry of happiness: "I’m a poor man and could never have hoped for such a great fortune."

That was the first and last time in his life that Kailas Babu confessed to being poor. It was also the first and last time in his life that he forgot, if only for a single moment, the ancestral dignity that belongs to the Babus of Nayanjore.

That was the first and only time in his life that Kailas Babu admitted to being poor. It was also the first and only time he temporarily forgot the ancestral pride that comes with being a Babu from Nayanjore.





LIVING OR DEAD?

I

The widow in the house of Saradasankar, the Ranihat zemindar, had no kinsmen of her father's family. One after another all had died. Nor had she in her husband's family any one she could call her own, neither husband nor son. The child of her brother-in-law Saradasankar was her darling. Far a long time after his birth, his mother had been very ill, and the widow, his aunt Kadambini, had fostered him. If a woman fosters another's child, her love for him is all the stronger because she has no claim upon him-no claim of kinship, that is, but simply the claim of love. Love cannot prove its claim by any document which society accepts, and does not wish to prove it; it merely worships with double passion its life's uncertain treasure. Thus all the widow's thwarted love went out to wards this little child. One night in Sraban Kadambini died suddenly. For some reason her heart stopped beating. Everywhere else the world held on its course; only in this gentle little breast, suffering with love, the watch of time stood still for ever.

The widow living in the house of Saradasankar, the Ranihat landowner, had no relatives from her father's side. One by one, they had all passed away. She also had no one from her husband's family whom she could call her own, neither a husband nor a son. The child of her brother-in-law Saradasankar was her treasured one. For a long time after his birth, his mother had been very ill, and the widow, his aunt Kadambini, took care of him. When a woman raises another's child, her love for him tends to be even deeper because she doesn't have any claim to him—not a familial claim, just the claim of love. Love can’t prove its hold with any documents accepted by society, and it doesn’t need to; it simply cherishes its uncertain treasure with even more intensity. Thus, all the widow’s unfulfilled love was directed toward this little child. One night in Sraban, Kadambini suddenly passed away. For some reason, her heart stopped beating. Everywhere else, the world continued to move on; only in this gentle little heart, overwhelmed with love, time came to a complete standstill forever.

Lest they should be harassed by the poike, four of the zemindar's Brahmin servants took away the body, without ceremony, to be burned. The burning-ground of Ranihat was very far from the village. There was a hut beside a tank, a huge banian near it, and nothing more. Formerly a river, now completely dried up, ran through the ground, and part of the watercourse had been dug out to make a tank for the performance of funeral rites. The people considered the tank as part of the river and reverenced it as such.

To avoid trouble from the poike, four of the zemindar's Brahmin servants took the body away, without any ceremony, to be cremated. The burning ground in Ranihat was quite far from the village. There was a hut next to a tank, a large banyan tree nearby, and nothing else. A river, now completely dried up, used to flow through the area, and part of the riverbed had been excavated to create a tank for performing funeral rites. The people regarded the tank as part of the river and honored it as such.

Taking the body into the hut, the four men sat down to wait for the wood. The time seemed so long that two of the four grew restless, and went to see why it did not come. Nitai and Gurucharan being gone, Bidhu and Banamali remained to watch over the body.

Taking the body into the hut, the four men sat down to wait for the wood. The wait felt so long that two of them grew restless and went to check on why it hadn’t arrived. With Nitai and Gurucharan gone, Bidhu and Banamali stayed behind to watch over the body.

It was a dark night of Sraban. Heavy clouds hung In a starless sky. The two men sat silent in the dark room. Their matches and lamp were useless. The matches were damp, and would not light, for all their efforts, and the lantern went out.

It was a dark night in Sraban. Thick clouds filled the starless sky. The two men sat quietly in the dark room. Their matches and lamp were useless. The matches were damp and wouldn’t ignite, despite their efforts, and the lantern had gone out.

After a long silence, one said: "Brother, it would be good if we had a bowl of tobacco. In our hurry we brought none."

After a long silence, one said: "Brother, it would be great if we had a bowl of tobacco. In our rush, we didn’t bring any."

The other answered: "I can run and bring all we want."

The other replied, "I can run and get everything we need."

Understanding why Banarnali wanted to go (From fear of ghosts, the burning-ground being considered haunted.), Bidhu said: "I daresay! Meanwhile, I suppose I am to sit here alone!"

Understanding why Banarnali wanted to go (From fear of ghosts, the burning-ground being considered haunted.), Bidhu said: "I guess I’m supposed to just sit here alone!"

Conversation ceased again. Five minutes seemed like an hour. In their minds they cursed the two, who had gone to fetch the wood, and they began to suspect that they sat gossiping in some pleasant nook. There was no sound anywhere, except the incessant noise of frogs and crickets from the tank. Then suddenly they fancied that the bed shook slightly, as if the dead body had turned on its side. Bidhu and Banamali trembled, and began muttering: "Ram, Ram." A deep sigh was heard in the room. In a moment the watchers leapt out of the hut, and raced for the village.

Conversation stopped again. Five minutes felt like an hour. In their heads, they cursed the two who had gone to get the wood, and they started to worry that they were off chatting in some nice spot. There was no sound anywhere, except for the constant croaking of frogs and chirping of crickets from the tank. Then suddenly, they thought they felt the bed shake slightly, as if the dead body had turned on its side. Bidhu and Banamali shivered and began muttering, "Ram, Ram." A deep sigh was heard in the room. In an instant, the watchers jumped out of the hut and ran toward the village.

After running about three miles, they met their colleagues coming back with a lantern. As a matter of fact, they had gone to smoke, and knew nothing about the wood. But they declared that a tree had been cut down, and that, when it was split up, it would be brought along at once. Then Bidhu and Banamali told them what had happened in the hut. Nitai and Gurucharan scoffed at the story, and abused Bidhu and Banamali angrily for leaving their duty.

After running about three miles, they ran into their colleagues heading back with a lantern. In reality, they had gone off to smoke and were completely unaware of the woods. But they insisted that a tree had been cut down and that it would be brought back as soon as it was chopped up. Then Bidhu and Banamali recounted what had happened in the hut. Nitai and Gurucharan mocked the story and angrily scolded Bidhu and Banamali for neglecting their duties.

Without delay all four returned to the hut. As they entered, they saw at once that the body was gone; nothing but an empty bed remained. They stared at one another. Could a jackal have taken it? But there was no scrap of clothing anywhere. Going outside, they saw that on the mud that had collected at the door of the but there were a woman's tiny footprints, newly made. Saradasankar was no fool, and they could hardly persuade him to believe in this ghost story. So after much discussion the four decided that it would be best to say that the body had been burnt.

Without wasting any time, all four headed back to the hut. As they walked in, they immediately noticed that the body was gone; only an empty bed was left behind. They looked at each other in shock. Could a jackal have taken it? But there wasn’t a single piece of clothing anywhere. Going outside, they saw small women's footprints in the mud that had gathered at the door, freshly made. Saradasankar wasn't naive, and they could barely convince him to buy into this ghost story. After a lot of discussion, the four agreed that it would be best to say that the body had been burned.

Towards dawn, when the men with the wood arrived they were told that, owing to their delay, the work had been done without them; there had been some wood in the but after all. No one was likely to question this, since a dead body is not such a valuable property that any one would steal it.

Towards dawn, when the guys with the wood arrived, they were told that, due to their delay, the work had been completed without them; there had been some wood in the end. No one was likely to dispute this, since a dead body isn't something valuable enough that anyone would steal it.

II

II

Every one knows that, even when there is no sign, life is often secretly present, and may begin again in an apparently dead body. Kadambini was not dead; only the machine of her life had for some reason suddenly stopped.

Everyone knows that, even without any signs, life is often secretly present and can restart in what seems like a lifeless body. Kadambini wasn't dead; her life just suddenly stopped for some reason.

When consciousness returned, she saw dense darkness on all sides. It occurred to her that she was not lying in her usual place. She called out "Sister," but no answer came from the darkness. As she sat up, terror-stricken, she remembered her death-bed, the sudden pain at her breast, the beginning of a choking sensation. Her elder sister-in-law was warming some milk for the child, when Kadambini became faint, and fell on the bed, saying with a choking voice: "Sister, bring the child here. I am worried." After that everything was black, as when an inkpot is upset over an exercise-book. Kadambini's memory and consciousness, all the letters of the world's book, in a moment became formless. The widow could not remember whether the child, in the sweet voice of love, called her "Auntie," as if for the last time, or not; she could not remember whether, as she left the world she knew for death's endless unknown journey, she had received a parting gift of affection, love's passage-money for the silent land. At first, I fancy, she thought the lonely dark place was the House of Yama, where there is nothing to see, nothing to hear, nothing to do, only an eternal watch. But when a cold damp wind drove through the open door, and she heard the croaking of frogs, she remembered vividly and in a moment all the rains of her short life, and could feel her kinship with the earth. Then came a flash of lightning, and she saw the tank, the banian, the great plain, the far-off trees. She remembered how at full moon she had sometimes come to bathe in this tank, and how dreadful death had seemed when she saw a corpse on the burning-ground.

When she regained consciousness, she found herself surrounded by complete darkness. It hit her that she wasn’t lying in her usual spot. She yelled out "Sister," but got no response from the emptiness. Sitting up in sheer panic, she recalled her deathbed, the sudden pain that shot through her chest, and the feeling of choking. Her sister-in-law was warming milk for the baby when Kadambini suddenly felt faint and collapsed onto the bed, rasping, "Sister, bring the baby here. I'm worried." After that, everything turned dark, like an ink pot spilling over onto a notebook. Kadambini’s memories and awareness faded, everything she had ever known became unrecognizable. She couldn’t remember if the child had sweetly called her "Auntie" for the last time or not; she couldn’t tell if, as she left the life she knew for the endless unknown of death, she had been given a farewell filled with love, a kind of passage money for the silent realm. At first, she thought the lonely dark place was the House of Yama, where there was nothing to see, hear, or do, just an endless vigil. But then a cold, damp breeze swept through the door, and as she heard the croaking of frogs, memories of all the rains in her short life flooded back, reminding her of her bond with the earth. Suddenly, a flash of lightning illuminated the scene; she saw the pond, the banyan tree, the vast plain, and the distant trees. She remembered how she used to come here to bathe under the full moon, and how terrifying death had seemed when she had seen a body on the cremation ground.

Her first thought was to return home. But then she reflected: "I am dead. How can I return home? That would bring disaster on them. I have left the kingdom of the living; I am my own ghost!" If this were not so, she reasoned, how could she have got out of Saradasankar's well-guarded zenana, and come to this distant burningground at midnight? Also, if her funeral rites had not been finished, where had the men gone who should burn her? Recalling her death-moment in Saradasankar's brightly-lit house, she now found herself alone in a distant, deserted, dark burning. ground. Surely she was no member of earthly society! Surely she was a creature of horror, of ill-omen, her own ghost!

Her first thought was to go back home. But then she thought, "I’m dead. How can I go back home? That would only bring disaster to them. I've left the world of the living; I’m my own ghost!" If that weren’t the case, how could she have escaped from Saradasankar's well-guarded zenana and made it to this remote burning ground at midnight? Also, if her funeral rites weren’t done, where were the men who were supposed to cremate her? Remembering the moment of her death in Saradasankar's brightly lit house, she now found herself alone in a distant, deserted, dark burning ground. Clearly, she was no longer a part of the living world! She was definitely a figure of horror, a bad omen, her own ghost!

At this thought, all the bonds were snapped which bound her to the world. She felt that she had marvellous strength, endless freedom. She could do what she liked, go where she pleased. Mad with the inspiration of this new idea, she rushed from the but like a gust of wind, and stood upon the burning ground. All trace of shame or fear had left her.

At this thought, all the ties that held her to the world broke. She realized she had incredible strength and unlimited freedom. She could do whatever she wanted, go wherever she chose. Inspired by this new idea, she burst out of the house like a gust of wind and stood on the scorching ground. All feelings of shame or fear had vanished from her.

But as she walked on and on, her feet grew tired, her body weak. The plain stretched on endlessly; here and there were paddy-fields; sometimes she found herself standing knee-deep in water.

But as she kept walking, her feet got tired and her body felt weak. The flat land went on forever; there were paddy fields here and there; sometimes she found herself standing knee-deep in water.

At the first glimmer of dawn she heard one or two birds cry from the bamboo-clumps by the distant houses. Then terror seized her. She could not tell in what new relation she stood to the earth and to living folk. So long as she had been on the plain, on the burning-ground, covered by the dark night of Sraban, so long she had been fearless, a denizen of her own kingdom. By daylight the homes of men filled her with fear. Men and ghosts dread each other, for their tribes inhabit different banks of the river of death.

At the first light of dawn, she heard one or two birds call from the bamboo clumps near the distant houses. Then, panic gripped her. She couldn't understand her new relationship with the earth and with other people. As long as she had been on the plain, in the scorched area, shrouded by the dark night of Sraban, she had felt fearless, a resident of her own realm. But in daylight, the homes of others filled her with dread. People and spirits fear each other because they belong to different sides of the river of death.

III

III

Her clothes were clotted in the mud; strange thoughts and walking by night had given her the aspect of a madwoman; truly, her apparition was such that folk might have been afraid of her, and children might have stoned her or run away. Luckily, the first to catch sight of her was a traveller. He came up, and said: "Mother, you look a respectable woman. Wherever are you going, alone and in this guise?"

Her clothes were caked in mud; weird thoughts and walking at night made her look like a madwoman. Honestly, she appeared so strange that people might have been scared of her, and kids might have thrown stones at her or run away. Fortunately, the first person to see her was a traveler. He approached and said, "Ma'am, you seem like a respectable woman. Where are you going, all alone and dressed like this?"

Kadambini, unable to collect her thoughts, stared at him in silence. She could not think that she was still in touch with the world, that she looked like a respectable woman, that a traveller was asking her questions.

Kadambini, unable to gather her thoughts, stared at him in silence. She couldn't believe that she was still connected to the world, that she appeared to be a respectable woman, and that a traveler was asking her questions.

Again the min said: "Come, mother, I will see you home. Tell me where you live."

Again the man said, "Come on, mom, I’ll walk you home. Where do you live?"

Kadambini thought. To return to her father-in-law's house would be absurd, and she had no father's house. Then she remembered the friend of her childhood. She had not seen Jogmaya since the days of her youth, but from time to time they had exchanged letters. Occasionally there had been quarrels between them, as was only right, since Kadambini wished to make it dear that her love for Jogmaya was unbounded, while her friend complained that Kadambini did not return a love equal to her own. They were both sure that, if they once met, they would be inseparable.

Kadambini thought. Going back to her father-in-law's house would be ridiculous, and she had no home to return to with her father. Then she remembered her childhood friend. She hadn't seen Jogmaya since their younger days, but they had occasionally exchanged letters. There had been some arguments between them, which was only natural, since Kadambini wanted to make it clear that her love for Jogmaya was limitless, while her friend felt that Kadambini didn't love her as much in return. They both believed that if they met again, they would be inseparable.

Kadambini said to the traveller: "I will go to Sripati's house at Nisindapur."

Kadambini said to the traveler, "I’m going to Sripati's house in Nisindapur."

As he was going to Calcutta, Nisindapur, though not near, was on his way. So he took Kadambini to Sripati s house, and the friends met again. At first they did not recognise one another, but gradually each recognised the features of the other's childhood.

As he was heading to Calcutta, Nisindapur, although not close, was along the way. So he took Kadambini to Sripati's house, and the friends reunited. At first, they didn't recognize each other, but slowly each recognized the familiar features from their childhood.

"What luck!" said Jogmaya. "I never dreamt that I should see you again. But how hate you come here, sister? Your father-in-law's folk surely didn't let you go!"

"What luck!" said Jogmaya. "I never thought I'd see you again. But how did you get here, sister? Your father-in-law's family surely didn't let you leave!"

Kadambini remained silent, and at last said: "Sister, do not ask about my father-in-law. Give me a corner, and treat me as a servant: I will do your work."

Kadambini stayed quiet for a moment and finally said, "Sister, please don’t ask about my father-in-law. Just give me a corner and treat me like a servant: I’ll handle your tasks."

"What?" cried Jogmaya. "Keep you like a servant! Why, you are my closest friend, you are my—" and so on and so on.

"What?" cried Jogmaya. "Keep you like a servant! You're my closest friend, you're my—" and so on and so on.

Just then Sripati came in. Kadambini stared at him for some time, and then went out very slowly. She kept her head uncovered, and showed not the slightest modesty or respect. Jogmaya, fearing that Sripati would be prejudiced against her friend, began an elaborate explanation. But Sripati, who readily agreed to anything Jogmaya said, cut short her story, and left his wife uneasy in her mind.

Just then, Sripati walked in. Kadambini stared at him for a bit, then left slowly. She didn't cover her head and showed no sign of modesty or respect. Jogmaya, worried that Sripati might think badly of her friend, started to explain everything in detail. However, Sripati, who quickly agreed with whatever Jogmaya said, interrupted her story and left his wife feeling unsettled.

Kadambini had come, but she was not at one with her friend: death was between them. She could feel no intimacy for others so long as her existence perplexed her and consciousness remained. Kadambini would look at Jogmaya, and brood. She would think: "She has her husband and her work, she lives in a world far away from mine. She shares affection and duty with the people of the world; I am an empty shadow. She is among the living; I am in eternity."

Kadambini had arrived, but she felt distant from her friend: death stood between them. She couldn’t feel close to others as long as her own existence confused her and she remained aware. Kadambini would gaze at Jogmaya and reflect. She would think, “She has her husband and her job, she lives in a world that's completely different from mine. She shares love and responsibilities with the people around her; I’m just a hollow presence. She is surrounded by the living; I am stuck in forever.”

Jogmaya also was uneasy, but could not explain why. Women do not love mystery, because, though uncertainty may be transmuted into poetry, into heroism, into scholarship, it cannot be turned to account in household work. So, when a woman cannot understand a thing, she either destroys and forgets it, or she shapes it anew for her own use; if she fails to deal with it in one of these ways, she loses her temper with it. The greater Kadambini's abstraction became, the more impatient was Jogmaya with her, wondering what trouble weighed upon her mind.

Jogmaya also felt uneasy but couldn’t quite figure out why. Women don’t like mystery because, while uncertainty can be transformed into poetry, heroism, or knowledge, it doesn't help with everyday tasks. So, when a woman doesn’t understand something, she either gets rid of it and forgets it or reshapes it for her own needs; if she can’t do either, she gets frustrated with it. The more absorbed Kadambini became in her thoughts, the more impatient Jogmaya grew with her, wondering what was troubling her.

Then a new danger arose. Kadambini was afraid of herself; yet she could not flee from herself. Those who fear ghosts fear those who are behind them; wherever they cannot see there is fear. But Kadambini's chief terror lay in herself, for she dreaded nothing external. At the dead of night, when alone in her room, she screamed; in the evening, when she saw her shadow in the lamp-light, her whole body shook. Watching her fearfulness, the rest of the house fell into a sort of terror. The servants and Jogmaya herself began to see ghosts.

Then a new danger appeared. Kadambini was scared of herself; yet she couldn’t escape from herself. Those who are afraid of ghosts fear what’s behind them; where they can’t see, there is fear. But Kadambini's biggest fear came from within, as she didn’t dread anything outside. In the dead of night, when she was alone in her room, she screamed; in the evening, when she saw her shadow in the lamplight, her whole body would shake. Watching her fear, the rest of the house felt a kind of terror as well. The servants and even Jogmaya began to see ghosts.

One midnight, Kadambini came out from her bedroom weeping, and wailed at Jogmaya's door: "Sister, sister, let me lie at your feet! Do not put me by myself!"

One midnight, Kadambini stepped out of her bedroom in tears and cried at Jogmaya's door, "Sister, sister, let me lie at your feet! Don't leave me alone!"

Jogmaya's anger was no less than her fear. She would have liked to drive Kadambini from the house that very second. The good-natured Sripati, after much effort, succeeded in quieting their guest, and put her in the next room.

Jogmaya's anger was just as strong as her fear. She wanted to kick Kadambini out of the house right then. The kind-hearted Sripati, after a lot of effort, managed to calm their guest down and moved her to the next room.

Next day Sripati was unexpectedly summoned to his wife's apartments. She began to upbraid him: "You, do you call yourself a man? A woman runs away from her father-in-law, and enters your house; a month passes, and you haven't hinted that she should go away, nor have I heard the slightest protest from you. I should cake it as a favour if you would explain yourself. You men are all alike."

Next day, Sripati was unexpectedly called to his wife's room. She started to scold him: "You, do you really consider yourself a man? A woman leaves her father-in-law and comes to your house; a month goes by, and you haven't even suggested that she should leave, nor have I heard a single complaint from you. I would appreciate it if you could explain yourself. You men are all the same."

Men, as a race, have a natural partiality for womankind in general, foe which women themselves hold them accountable. Although Sripati was prepared to touch Jogmaya's body, and swear that his kind feeling towards the helpless but beautiful Kadambini was no whit greater than it should be, he could not prove it by his behaviour. He thought that her father-in-law's people must have treated this forlorn widow abominably, if she could bear it no longer, and was driven to take refuge with him. As she had neither father nor mother, how could he desert her? So saying, he let the matter drop, far he had no mind to distress Kadambini by asking her unpleasant questions.

Men, as a group, have a natural preference for women in general, and women often hold them responsible for it. Although Sripati was ready to touch Jogmaya's body and insist that his feelings for the helpless yet beautiful Kadambini were completely appropriate, he couldn't show it through his actions. He believed that her in-laws must have treated the lonely widow terribly if she couldn’t stand it any longer and sought shelter with him. Since she had neither father nor mother, how could he abandon her? With that thought, he dropped the subject because he didn’t want to upset Kadambini by asking her uncomfortable questions.

His wife, then, tried other means of her sluggish lord, until at last he saw that for the sake of peace he must send word to Kadambini's father-in-law. The result of a letter, he thought, might not be satisfactory; so he resolved to go to Ranihat, and act on what he learnt.

His wife then tried different methods to get through to her slow husband, until finally he realized that for the sake of peace he had to reach out to Kadambini's father-in-law. He thought that the outcome of a letter might not be good, so he decided to go to Ranihat and act based on what he learned.

So Sripati went, and Jogmaya on her part said to Kadambini "Friend, it hardly seems proper for you to stop here any longer. What will people say?"

So Sripati went, and Jogmaya said to Kadambini, "Friend, it really doesn't seem right for you to stay here any longer. What will people think?"

Kadambini stared solemnly at Jogmaya, and said: "What have I to do with people?"

Kadambini looked seriously at Jogmaya and said, "What do I care about people?"

Jogmaya was astounded. Then she said sharply: "If you have nothing to do with people, we have. How can we explain the detention of a woman belonging to another house?"

Jogmaya was shocked. Then she said firmly, "If you have nothing to do with people, we do. How can we explain the detention of a woman from another household?"

Kadambini said: "Where is my father-in-law's house?"

Kadambini asked, "Where is my father-in-law's house?"

"Confound it!" thought Jogmaya. "What will the wretched woman say next?"

"Ugh!" thought Jogmaya. "What is that awful woman going to say next?"

Very slowly Kadambini said: "What have I to do with you? Am I of the earth? You laugh, weep, love; each grips and holds his own; I merely look. You are human, I a shadow. I cannot understand why God has kept me in this world of yours."

Very slowly, Kadambini said, "What do I have to do with you? Am I from this world? You laugh, cry, love; you all hold onto your own experiences while I just observe. You are human, and I am a shadow. I can't understand why God has placed me in your world."

So strange were her look and speech that Jogmaya understood something of her drift, though not all. Unable either to dismiss her, or to ask her any more questions, she went away, oppressed with thought.

Her look and speech were so unusual that Jogmaya sensed part of what she was getting at, though not everything. Unable to dismiss her or ask any more questions, she left, deep in thought.

IV

IV

It was nearly ten o'clock at night when Sripati returned from Ranihat. The earth was drowned in torrents of rain. It seemed that the downpour would never stop, that the night would never end.

It was almost ten o'clock at night when Sripati got back from Ranihat. The ground was soaked with heavy rain. It felt like the downpour would never cease, that the night would never finish.

Jogmaya asked: "Well?"

Jogmaya asked, "What's up?"

"I've lots to say, presently."

"I have a lot to say right now."

So saying, Sripati changed his clothes, and sat down to supper; then he lay dawn for a smoke. His mind was perplexed.

So saying, Sripati changed his clothes and sat down for dinner; then he lay down for a smoke. His mind was troubled.

His wife stilled her curiosity for a long time; then she came to his couch and demanded: "What did you hear?"

His wife held back her curiosity for a long time; then she came to his couch and asked, "What did you hear?"

"That you have certainly made a mistake."

"That you've definitely made a mistake."

Jogmaya was nettled. Women never make mistakes, or, if they do, a sensible man never mentions them; it is better to take them on his own shoulders. Jogmaya snapped: "May I be permitted to hear how?"

Jogmaya was irritated. Women never make mistakes, or if they do, a reasonable man never brings them up; it's better to carry the burden himself. Jogmaya snapped, "Can I ask how?"

Sripati replied: "The woman you have taken into your house is not your Kadambini."

Sripati replied, "The woman you've brought into your home isn't your Kadambini."

Hearing this, she was greatly annoyed, especially since it was her husband who said it. "What! I don't know my own friend? I must come to you to recognise her! You are clever, indeed!"

Hearing this, she was really annoyed, especially since it was her husband who said it. "What! I don't know my own friend? I have to come to you to recognize her! You're so clever, aren't you!"

Sripati explained that there was no need to quarrel about his cleverness. He could prove what he said. There was no doubt that Jogmaya's Kadambini was dead.

Sripati explained that there was no need to argue about his cleverness. He could prove his point. There was no doubt that Jogmaya's Kadambini was dead.

Jogmaya replied: "Listen! You've certainly made some huge mistake. You've been to the wrong house, or are confused as to what you have heard. Who told you to go yourself? Write a letter, and everything will be cleared up."

Jogmaya replied: "Listen! You've definitely made a big mistake. You've gone to the wrong house, or you're confused about what you've heard. Who told you to come here yourself? Just write a letter, and everything will be sorted out."

Sripati was hurt by his wife's lack of faith in his executive ability; he produced all sorts of proof, without result. Midnight found them still asserting and contradicting. Although they were both agreed now that Kadambini should be got out of the house, although Sripati believed that their guest had deceived his wife all the time by a pretended acquaintance, and Jogmaya that she was a prostitute, yet in the present discussion neither would acknowledge defeat. By degrees their voices became so loud that they forgot that Kadambini was sleeping in the next room.

Sripati was hurt by his wife's lack of trust in his ability to lead; he presented all kinds of evidence, but it didn't change anything. By midnight, they were still arguing and contradicting each other. Even though they both agreed that Kadambini needed to leave the house—Sripati thought their guest had been tricking his wife all along by pretending to know her, and Jogmaya believed she was a prostitute—in this conversation, neither of them would back down. Gradually, their voices got so loud that they forgot Kadambini was sleeping in the next room.

The one said: "We're in a nice fix! I tell you, I heard it with my own ears!" And the other answered angrily: "What do I care about that? I can see with my own eyes, surely."

The first person said, "We're in quite a mess! I swear, I heard it with my own ears!" And the other replied angrily, "What do I care about that? I can see with my own eyes, clearly."

At length Jogmaya said: "Very well. Tell me when Kadambini died." She thought that if she could find a discrepancy between the day of death and the date of some letter from Kadambini, she could prove that Sripati erred.

At last, Jogmaya said, "Alright. Tell me when Kadambini died." She thought that if she could find a difference between the day of death and the date on some letter from Kadambini, she could show that Sripati made a mistake.

He told her the date of Kadambini's death, and they both saw that it fell on the very day before she came to their house. Jogmaya's heart trembled, even Sripati was not unmoved.

He told her the date of Kadambini's death, and they both realized it was the day before she came to their house. Jogmaya's heart raced, and even Sripati was affected.

Just then the door flew open; a damp wind swept in and blew the lamp out. The darkness rushed after it, and filled the whole house. Kadambini stood in the room. It was nearly one o'clock, the rain was pelting outside.

Just then the door burst open; a chilly wind rushed in and blew out the lamp. The darkness quickly followed and filled the entire house. Kadambini stood in the room. It was almost one o'clock, and the rain was pouring outside.

Kadambini spoke: "Friend, I am your Kadambini, but I am no longer living. I am dead."

Kadambini said, "Friend, I'm your Kadambini, but I'm no longer alive. I am dead."

Jogmaya screamed with terror; Sripati could speak.

Jogmaya screamed in fear; Sripati was able to talk.

"But, save in being dead, I have done you no wrong. If I have no place among the living, I have none among the dead. Oh! whither shall I go?"

"But, except for being dead, I haven't harmed you at all. If I don't belong with the living, then I don't belong with the dead either. Oh! Where should I go?"

Crying as if to wake the sleeping Creator in the dense night of rain, she asked again: "Oh! whither shall I go?"

Crying as if to wake the sleeping Creator in the heavy rain of the night, she asked again, "Oh! where should I go?"

So saying Kadambini left her friend fainting in the dark house, and went out into the world, seeking her own place.

So saying, Kadambini left her friend fainting in the dark house and stepped out into the world, looking for her own space.

V

V

It is hard to say how Kadambini reached Ranihat. At first she showed herself to no one, but spent the whole day in a ruined temple, starving. When the untimely afternoon of the rains was pitch-black, and people huddled into their houses for fear of the impending storm, then Kadambini came forth. Her heart trembled as she reached her father-in-law's house; and when, drawing a thick veil over her face, she entered, none of the doorkeepers objected, since they took her for a servant. And the rain was pouring down, and the wind howled.

It’s difficult to know how Kadambini made it to Ranihat. At first, she kept to herself and spent the entire day in a run-down temple, hungry. When the sudden afternoon rains turned everything pitch-black, and people rushed into their homes out of fear of the coming storm, Kadambini finally emerged. Her heart raced as she approached her father-in-law's house; and when she walked in, pulling a thick veil over her face, none of the doorkeepers stopped her since they mistook her for a servant. Meanwhile, the rain was pouring down, and the wind was howling.

The mistress, Saradasankar's wife, was playing cards with her widowed sister. A servant was in the kitchen, the sick child was sleeping in the bedroom. Kadambini, escaping every one's notice, entered this room. I do not know why she had come to her father-in-law's house; she herself did not know; she felt only that she wanted to see her child again. She had no thought where to go next, or what to do.

The mistress, Saradasankar's wife, was playing cards with her widowed sister. A servant was in the kitchen, and the sick child was sleeping in the bedroom. Kadambini, unnoticed by everyone, entered this room. I don't know why she had come to her father-in-law's house; even she didn't know; she just felt that she wanted to see her child again. She had no idea where to go next or what to do.

In the lighted room she saw the child sleeping, his fists clenched, his body wasted with fever. At sight of him, her heart became parched and thirsty. If only she could press that tortured body to her breast! Immediately the thought followed: "I do not exist. Who would see it? His mother loves company, loves gossip and cards. All the time that she left me in charge, she was herself free from anxiety, nor was she troubled about him in the least. Who will look after him now as I did?"

In the bright room, she saw the child sleeping, his fists clenched, his body weak from fever. The sight of him made her heart feel dry and thirsty. If only she could hold that suffering body close to her! Immediately, another thought came to mind: "I don't matter. Who would even notice? His mother loves having people around, loves gossip and playing cards. While she left me to take care of him, she was completely at ease, not worried about him at all. Who will take care of him now like I did?"

The child turned on his side, and cried, half-asleep: "Auntie, give me water." Her darling had not yet forgotten his auntie! In a fever of excitement, she poured out some water, and, taking him to her breast, she gave it him.

The child rolled onto his side and mumbled, half-asleep, "Auntie, can I have some water?" Her darling still remembered his auntie! In a rush of excitement, she poured some water, and, pulling him close, she gave it to him.

As long as he was asleep, the child felt no strangeness in taking water from the accustomed hand. But when Kadambini satisfied her long-starved longing, and kissed him and began rocking him asleep again, he awoke and embraced her. "Did you die, Auntie?" he asked.

As long as he was asleep, the child felt no weirdness in taking water from the familiar hand. But when Kadambini satisfied her long-starved desire, kissed him, and started rocking him to sleep again, he woke up and hugged her. "Did you die, Auntie?" he asked.

"Yes, darling."

"Yeah, babe."

"And you have come back? Do not die again."

"And you’ve come back? Don’t die again."

Before she could answer disaster overtook her. One of the maidservants coming in with a cup of sago dropped it, and fell down. At the crash the mistress left her cards, and entered the room. She stood like a pillar of wood, unable to flee or speak. Seeing all this, the child, too, became terrified, and burst out weeping: "Go away, Auntie," he said, "go away!"

Before she could respond, disaster struck. One of the maids came in with a cup of sago, dropped it, and fell down. At the sound of the crash, the mistress left her cards and walked into the room. She stood there like a statue, unable to move or speak. Seeing all this, the child grew scared and started crying: "Go away, Auntie," he said, "go away!"

Now at last Kadambini understood that she had not died. The old room, the old things, the same child, the same love, all returned to their living state, without change or difference between her and them. In her friend's house she had felt that her childhood's companion was dead. In her child's room she knew that the boy's "Auntie" was not dead at all. In anguished tones she said: "Sister, why do you dread me? See, I am as you knew me."

Now, finally, Kadambini realized that she was still alive. The familiar room, the same objects, the same child, and the same love had all come back to life, unchanged and indistinguishable from her. At her friend's house, she had felt like her childhood companion was gone. In her child's room, she understood that the boy's "Auntie" was very much alive. In a voice filled with pain, she said, "Sister, why are you afraid of me? Look, I am just as you remember."

Her sister-in-law could endure no longer, and fell into a faint. Saradasankar himself entered the zenana. With folded hands, he said piteously: "Is this right? Satis is my only son. Why do you show yourself to him? Are we not your own kin? Since you went, he has wasted away daily; his fever has been incessant; day and night he cries: 'Auntie, Auntie.' You have left the world; break these bonds of maya (Illusory affection binding a soul to the world). We will perform all funeral honours."

Her sister-in-law couldn't take it anymore and fainted. Saradasankar himself entered the women’s quarters. With his hands together, he pleaded: "Is this fair? Satis is my only son. Why do you show yourself to him? Aren't we your own family? Since you left, he has been withering away every day; his fever hasn’t stopped; day and night he cries: 'Auntie, Auntie.' You have left this world; please break these ties of illusion. We will take care of all the funeral rites."

Kadambini could bear no more. She said: "Oh, I am not dead, I am not dead. Oh, how can I persuade you that I am not dead? I am living, living!" She lifted a brass pot from the ground and dashed it against her forehead. The blood ran from her brow. "Look!" she cried, "I am living!" Saradasankar stood like an image; the child screamed with fear, the two fainting women lay still.

Kadambini could take it no longer. She exclaimed, "Oh, I’m not dead, I’m not dead. How can I convince you that I’m not dead? I’m alive, alive!" She picked up a brass pot from the ground and smashed it against her forehead. Blood flowed from her brow. "Look!" she shouted, "I’m alive!" Saradasankar stood frozen like a statue; the child screamed in terror, and the two unconscious women lay still.

Then Kadambini, shouting "I am not dead, I am not dead," went down the steps to the zenana well, and plunged in. From the upper storey Saradasankar heard the splash.

Then Kadambini, shouting "I'm not dead, I'm not dead," went down the steps to the zenana well and jumped in. From the upper floor, Saradasankar heard the splash.

All night the rain poured; it poured next day at dawn, was pouring still at noon. By dying, Kadambini had given proof that she was not dead.

All night, the rain fell; it was still falling at dawn the next day and continued at noon. By dying, Kadambini proved that she was not really dead.





"WE CROWN THEE KING"

When Nabendu Sekhar was wedded to Arunlekha, the God of marriage smiled from behind the sacrificial fire. Alas! what is sport for the gods is not always a joke to us poor mortals.

When Nabendu Sekhar married Arunlekha, the God of marriage smiled from behind the sacrificial fire. Unfortunately, what is fun for the gods isn't always a joke for us poor mortals.

Purnendu Sekhar, the father of Nabendu, was a man well known amongst the English officials of the Government. In the voyage of life he had arrived at the desert shores of Rai Bahadurship by diligently plying his oats of salaams. He held in reserve enough for further advancement, but at the age of fifty-five, his tender gaze still fixed on the misty peals of Raja-hood, he suddenly found himself transported to a region where earthly honours and decorations are naught, and his salaam-wearied neck found everlasting repose on the funeral pyre.

Purnendu Sekhar, Nabendu's father, was well-known among the English officials of the Government. Throughout his life, he had worked hard to earn respect and recognition. He had the potential for more success, but at fifty-five, with his hopeful eyes still set on the lofty title of Raja, he suddenly found himself in a place where earthly honors and awards mean nothing, and his weary neck finally found rest on the funeral pyre.

According to modern science, force is not destroyed, but is merely converted to another form, and applied to another point. So Purnendu's salaam-force, constant handmaid of the fickle Goddess of Fortune, descended from the shoulder of the father to that of his worthy son; and the youthful head of Nabendu Sekhar began to move up and down, at the doors of high-placed Englishmen, like a pumpkin swayed by the wind.

According to modern science, force isn’t destroyed; it’s just changed into another form and directed elsewhere. So Purnendu's greeting energy, the ever-present servant of the unpredictable Goddess of Fortune, passed from the father’s shoulder to his worthy son’s. The young Nabendu Sekhar started nodding at the doors of high-ranking Englishmen, like a pumpkin swaying in the wind.

The traditions of the family into which he had married were entirely different. Its eldest son, Pramathanath, had won for himself the love of his kinsfolk and the regard of all who knew him. His kinsmen and his neighbours looked up to him as their ideal in all things.

The traditions of the family he married into were completely different. Its oldest son, Pramathanath, had earned the love of his relatives and the respect of everyone who knew him. His family and neighbors admired him as their role model in everything.

Pramathanath was a Bachelor of Arts, and in addition was gifted with common sense. But he held no high official position; he had no handsome salary; nor did he exert any influence with his pen. There was no one in power to lend him a helping hand, because he desired to keep away from Englishmen, as much as they desired to keep away from him. So it happened that he shone only within the sphere of his family and his friends, and excited no admiration beyond it.

Pramathanath had a Bachelor of Arts degree and was also quite sensible. However, he didn’t hold any prestigious job, earn a good salary, or have any influence through his writing. There was no one in a position of power to support him because he wanted to distance himself from Englishmen, just as they wanted to avoid him. As a result, he only stood out among his family and friends and didn’t attract any admiration beyond that circle.

Yet this Pramathanath had once sojourned in England for some three years. The kindly treatment he received during his stay there overpowered him so much that he forgot the sorrow and the humiliation of his own country, and came back dressed in European clothes. This rather grieved his brothers and his sisters at first, but after a few days they began to think that European clothes suited nobody better, and gradually they came to share his pride and dignity.

Yet this Pramathanath had once stayed in England for about three years. The kind treatment he received during his time there affected him so deeply that he forgot the pain and humiliation of his own country and returned wearing European clothes. At first, this made his brothers and sisters a bit upset, but after a few days, they began to see that European clothes looked good on him, and gradually they started to share his pride and dignity.

On his return from England, Pramathanath resolved that he would show the world how to associate with Anglo-Indians on terms of equality. Those of our countrymen who think that no such association is possible, unless we bend our knees to them, showed their utter lack of self-respect, and were also unjust to the English-so thought Pramathanath.

On his return from England, Pramathanath decided that he would demonstrate to the world how to engage with Anglo-Indians as equals. He believed that those from our country who think such a relationship isn’t possible unless we lower ourselves to them displayed a complete lack of self-respect, and were also unfair to the English.

He brought with him letters of introduction from many distinguished Englishmen at home, and these gave him some recognition in Anglo-Indian society. He and his wife occasionally enjoyed English hospitality at tea, dinner, sports and other entertainments. Such good luck intoxicated him, and began to produce a tingling sensation in every vein of his body.

He brought letters of introduction from several prominent Englishmen back home, which gave him some recognition in Anglo-Indian society. He and his wife occasionally enjoyed English hospitality at tea, dinner, sports, and other events. This good fortune made him feel exhilarated and started to create a thrilling sensation in every vein of his body.

About this time, at the opening of a new railway line, many of the town, proud recipients of official favour, were invited by the Lieutenant-Governor to take the first trip. Pramathanath was among them. On the return journey, a European Sergeant of the Police expelled some Indian gentlemen from a railway-carriage with great insolence. Pramathanath, dressed in his European clothes, was there. He, too, was getting out, when the Sergeant said: "You needn't move, sir. Keep your seat, please."

Around this time, at the launch of a new train line, many townspeople, who were proud to have received official recognition, were invited by the Lieutenant-Governor to take the inaugural trip. Pramathanath was one of them. On the way back, a European police sergeant rudely threw some Indian gentlemen out of a train carriage. Pramathanath, wearing his Western clothes, was also getting out when the sergeant said, “You don’t have to move, sir. Please stay seated.”

At first Pramathanath felt flattered at the special respect thus shown to him. When, however, the train went on, the dull rays of the setting sun, at the west of the fields, now ploughed up and stripped of green, seemed in his eyes to spread a glow of shame over the whole country. Sitting near the window of his lonely compartment, he seemed to catch a glimpse of the down-cast eyes of his Motherland, hidden behind the trees. As Pramathanath sat there, lost in reverie, burning tears flowed down his cheeks, and his heart burst with indignation.

At first, Pramathanath felt flattered by the special respect shown to him. However, as the train continued on, the dull rays of the setting sun in the fields, now plowed and stripped of greenery, seemed to cast a glow of shame over the entire country in his eyes. Sitting by the window of his lonely compartment, he thought he caught a glimpse of the downcast eyes of his Motherland, hidden behind the trees. As Pramathanath sat there, lost in thought, burning tears streamed down his cheeks, and his heart swelled with indignation.

He now remembered the story of a donkey who was drawing the chariot of an idol along the street. The wayfarers bowed down to the idol, and touched the dusty ground with their foreheads. The foolish donkey imagined that all this reverence was being shown to him. "The only difference," said Pramathanath to himself, "between the donkey and myself is this: I understand to-day that the respect I receive is not given to me but to the burden on my back."

He now recalled the tale of a donkey pulling a chariot of an idol down the street. Passersby bowed to the idol and touched the dusty ground with their foreheads. The clueless donkey thought all this reverence was directed at him. "The only difference," Pramathanath told himself, "between the donkey and me is this: I realize today that the respect I receive isn't for me but for the load I carry."

Arriving home, Pramathanath called together all the children of the household, and lighting a big bonfire, threw all his European clothes into it one by one. The children danced round and round it, and the higher the flames shot up, the greater was their merriment. After that, Pramathanath gave up his sip of tea and bits of toast in Anglo-Indian houses, and once again sat inaccessible within the castle of his house, while his insulted friends went about from the door of one Englishman to that of another, bending their turbaned heads as before.

When Pramathanath got home, he gathered all the kids in the household and, after lighting a big bonfire, tossed in all his European clothes one by one. The children danced around the fire, and the higher the flames soared, the more joyful they became. After that, Pramathanath stopped having his tea and toast in Anglo-Indian homes and once again isolated himself within the fortress of his house, while his offended friends went from one Englishman's door to another, bowing their turbaned heads just like before.

By an irony of fate, poor Nabendu Sekhar married the second daughter of this house. His sisters-in-law were well educated and handsome. Nabendu considered he had made a lucky bargain. But he lost no time in trying to impress on the family that it was a rare bargain on their side also. As if by mistake, he would often hand to his sisters-in-law sundry letters that his late father had received from Europeans. And when the cherry lips of those young ladies smiled sarcastically, and the point of a shining dagger peeped out of its sheath of red velvet, the unfortunate man saw his folly, and regretted it.

By a twist of fate, poor Nabendu Sekhar ended up marrying the second daughter of this house. His sisters-in-law were well-educated and attractive. Nabendu thought he had struck a lucky deal. But he quickly tried to make it clear to the family that it was a rare deal for them as well. As if by accident, he would often hand his sisters-in-law various letters that his late father had received from Europeans. And when those young ladies smiled sarcastically, while the glint of a shiny dagger peeked out from its red velvet sheath, the unfortunate man realized his mistake and regretted it.

Labanyalekha, the eldest sister, surpassed the rest in beauty and cleverness. Finding an auspicious day, she put on the mantel-shelf of Nabendu's bedroom two pairs of English boots, daubed with vermilion, and arranged flowers, sandal-paste, incense and a couple of burning candles before them in true ceremonial fashion. When Nabendu came in, the two sisters-in-law stood on either side of him, and said with mock solemnity: "Bow down to your gods, and may you prosper through their blessings."

Labanyalekha, the oldest sister, was more beautiful and clever than the others. Choosing a lucky day, she placed two pairs of English boots, painted with red powder, on the mantel in Nabendu's bedroom. She arranged flowers, sandalwood paste, incense, and a couple of lit candles in front of them, following traditional rituals. When Nabendu entered, the two sisters-in-law stood beside him and said with playful seriousness, "Bow down to your gods, and may you thrive through their blessings."

The third sister Kiranlekha spent many days in embroidering with red silk one hundred common English names such as Jones, Smith, Brown, Thomson, etc., on a chadar. When it was ready, she presented this namavoli (A namavoli is a sheet of cloth printed all over with the names of Hindu gods and goddesses and worn by pious Hindus when engaged in devotional exercises.) to Nabendu Sekhar with great ceremony.

The third sister, Kiranlekha, spent several days stitching one hundred common English names like Jones, Smith, Brown, and Thomson in red silk onto a chadar. When it was finished, she presented this namavoli (a namavoli is a piece of fabric covered with the names of Hindu gods and goddesses, worn by devoted Hindus during their prayers) to Nabendu Sekhar with much fanfare.

The fourth, Sasankalekha, of tender age and therefore of no account, said: "I will make you a string of beads, brother, with which to tell the names of your gods-the sahibs." Her sisters reproved her, saying: "Run away, you saucy girl."

The fourth, Sasankalekha, young and therefore insignificant, said: "I'll make you a necklace of beads, brother, to help you remember the names of your gods—the sahibs." Her sisters scolded her, saying: "Go away, you cheeky girl."

Feelings of shame and irritation assailed by turns the mind of Nabendu Sekhar. Still he could not forego the company of his sisters-in-law, especially as the eldest one was beautiful. Her honey was no less than her gall, and Nabendu's mind tasted at once the sweetness of the one and the bitterness of the other. The butterfly, with its bruised wings, buzzes round the flower in blind fury, unable to depart.

Feelings of shame and irritation alternated in Nabendu Sekhar's mind. Still, he couldn't give up being around his sisters-in-law, especially since the oldest was beautiful. Her sweetness was just as strong as her harshness, and Nabendu's mind experienced both the delight of one and the sting of the other. The butterfly, with its damaged wings, flits around the flower in a blind frenzy, unable to leave.

The society of his sisters-in-Law so much infatuated him that at last Nabendu began to disavow his craving for European favours. When he went to salaam the Burra Sahib, he used to pretend that he was going to listen to a speech by Mr. Surendranath Banerjea. When he went to the railway station to pay respects to the Chota Sahib, returning from Darjeeling, he would tell his sisters-in-law that he expected his youngest uncle.

The company of his sisters-in-law captivated him so much that eventually, Nabendu started to deny his desire for European attention. When he went to greet the Burra Sahib, he would pretend he was going to hear a speech by Mr. Surendranath Banerjea. When he went to the train station to pay his respects to the Chota Sahib coming back from Darjeeling, he would tell his sisters-in-law that he was expecting his youngest uncle.

It was a sore trial to the unhappy man placed between the cross-fires of his Sahibs and his sisters-in-law. The sisters-in-law, however, secretly vowed that they would not rest till the Sahibs had been put to rout.

It was a tough situation for the miserable man caught in the crossfire between his bosses and his sisters-in-law. The sisters-in-law, however, secretly promised not to stop until the bosses were defeated.

About this time it was rumoured that Nabendu's name would be included in the forthcoming list of Birthday honours, and that he would mount the first step of the ladder to Paradise by becoming a Rai Bahadur. The poor fellow had not the courage to break the joyful news to his sisters-in-law. One evening, however, when the autumn moon was flooding the earth with its mischievous beams, Nabendu's heart was so full that he could not contain himself any longer, and he told his wife. The next day, Mrs. Nabendu betook herself to her eldest sister's house in a palanquin, and in a voice choked with tears bewailed her lot.

Around this time, there were rumors that Nabendu’s name would be on the upcoming list of Birthday honors, and that he would take the first step on the ladder to success by becoming a Rai Bahadur. The poor guy didn’t have the courage to share the exciting news with his sisters-in-law. One evening, however, when the autumn moon was shining down on the earth with its playful light, Nabendu’s heart was so full that he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore, and he told his wife. The next day, Mrs. Nabendu went to her eldest sister’s house in a palanquin, and with a voice choked with tears, she mourned her situation.

"He isn't going to grow a tail," said Labanya, "by becoming a Rai Bahadur, is he? Why should you feel so very humiliated?"

"He’s not going to grow a tail just because he’s becoming a Rai Bahadur, is he? Why should you feel so embarrassed?"

"Oh, no, sister dear," replied Arunlekha, "I am prepared to be anything—but not a Rai-Baha-durni." The fact was that in her circle of acquaintances there was one Bhutnath Babu, who was a Rai Bahadur, and that explained her intense aversion to that title.

"Oh, no, dear sister," Arunlekha replied, "I'm okay with being anything—just not a Rai-Bahadur." The truth was, in her group of friends, there was a Bhutnath Babu, who held the title of Rai Bahadur, and that's why she felt so strongly against that title.

Labanya said to her sister in soothing tones: "Don't be upset about it, dear; I will see what I can do to prevent it."

Labanya said to her sister in a calming voice, "Don't worry about it, dear; I'll see what I can do to stop it."

Babu Nilratan, the husband of Labanya, was a pleader at Buxar. When the autumn was over, Nabendu received an invitation from Labanya to pay them a visit, and he started for Buxar greatly pleased.

Babu Nilratan, Labanya's husband, was a lawyer in Buxar. As autumn came to an end, Nabendu got an invitation from Labanya to visit them, and he set off for Buxar feeling very happy.

The early winter of the western province endowed Labanyalekha with new health and beauty, and brought a glowing colour to her pale cheeks, She looked like the flower-laden kasa reeds on a clear autumn day, growing by the lonely bank of a rivulet. To Nabendu's enchanted eyes she appeared like a malati plant in full blossom, showering dew-drops brilliant with the morning light.

The early winter in the western province gave Labanyalekha new health and beauty, adding a radiant color to her pale cheeks. She resembled the flower-filled kasa reeds on a clear autumn day, growing by the quiet bank of a small stream. To Nabendu's captivated gaze, she looked like a malati plant in full bloom, sparkling with dew drops in the morning light.

Nabendu had never felt better in his life. The exhilaration of his own health and the genial company of his pretty sister-in-law made him think himself light enough to tread on air. The Ganges in front of the garden seemed to him to be flowing ceaselessly to regions unknown, as though it gave shape to his own wild fantasies.

Nabendu had never felt better in his life. The thrill of his good health and the cheerful company of his attractive sister-in-law made him feel as if he could float on air. The Ganges in front of the garden appeared to him to be continuously flowing to unknown destinations, as if it were giving form to his own wild dreams.

As he returned in the early morning from his walk on the bank of the river, the mellow rays of the winter sun gave his whole frame that pleasing sensation of warmth which lovers feel in each other's arms. Coming home, he would now and then find his sister-in-Law amusing herself by cooking some dishes. He would offer his help, and display his want of skill and ignorance at every step. But Nabendu did not appear to be at all anxious to improve himself by practice and attention. On the contrary he thoroughly enjoyed the rebukes he received from his sister-in-law. He was at great pains to prove every day that he was inefficient and helpless as a new-born babe in mixing spices, handling the saucepan, and regulating the heat so as to prevent things getting burnt-and he was duly rewarded with pitiful smiles and scoldings.

As he returned early in the morning from his walk along the riverbank, the soft rays of the winter sun wrapped his whole body in that comforting warmth that lovers feel in each other’s arms. When he got home, he would occasionally find his sister-in-law entertaining herself by cooking some meals. He would offer to help and showcase his lack of skill and ignorance at every turn. However, Nabendu didn’t seem to want to improve through practice and focus. On the contrary, he genuinely enjoyed the teasing he got from his sister-in-law. He made a point of proving each day that he was as inept and helpless as a newborn when it came to mixing spices, managing the saucepan, and adjusting the heat to prevent burning—and he was rewarded with sympathetic smiles and gentle scoldings.

In the middle of the day he ate a great deal of the good food set before him, incited by his keen appetite and the coaxing of his sister-in-law. Later on, he would sit down to a game of cards—at which he betrayed the same lack of ability. He would cheat, pry into his adversary's hand, quarrel—but never did he win a single rubber, and worse still, he would not acknowledge defeat. This brought him abuse every day, and still he remained incorrigible.

In the middle of the day, he ate a lot of the delicious food in front of him, driven by his strong appetite and his sister-in-law's coaxing. Later, he would sit down to play cards—where he showed the same lack of skill. He would cheat, peek at his opponent's hand, and argue—but he never won a single game, and even worse, he wouldn't admit to losing. This led to him being criticized every day, yet he remained unchangeable.

There was, however, one matter in which his reform was complete. For the time at least, he had forgotten that to win the smiles of Sahibs was the final goal of life. He was beginning to understand how happy and worthy we might feel by winning the affection and esteem of those near and dear to us.

There was, however, one thing he had completely changed. For the moment, he had forgotten that winning the approval of the Sahibs was the ultimate goal in life. He was starting to realize how happy and fulfilled we could feel by earning the love and respect of those close to us.

Besides, Nabendu was now moving in a new atmosphere. Labanya's husband, Babu Nilratan, a leader of the bar, was reproached by many because he refused to pay his respects to European officials. To all such reproaches Nilratan would reply: "No, thank you,—if they are not polite enough to return my call, then the politeness I offer them is a loss that can never be made up for. The sands of the desert may be very white and shiny, but I would much rather sow my seeds in black soil, where I can expect a return."

Besides, Nabendu was now in a new environment. Labanya's husband, Babu Nilratan, a prominent lawyer, faced criticism from many for not showing respect to European officials. To all such criticisms, Nilratan would respond: "No, thank you—if they’re not polite enough to return my call, then the courtesy I extend to them is a loss that can never be recovered. The sands of the desert may be very white and shiny, but I would much rather plant my seeds in black soil, where I can expect a return."

And Nabendu began to adopt similar ideas, all regardless of the future. His chance of Rai Bahadurship throve on the soil carefully prepared by his late father and also by himself in days gone by, nor was any fresh watering required. Had he not at great expense laid out a splendid race-course in a town, which was a fashionable resort of Europeans?

And Nabendu started to embrace similar ideas, without thinking about the future. His opportunity for attaining the title of Rai Bahadur was built on the foundation carefully laid by his late father and by himself in the past, and no additional nurturing was needed. Hadn’t he invested a lot of money to create a magnificent racecourse in a town that was a popular destination for Europeans?

When the time of Congress drew near, Nilratan received a request from head-quarters to collect subscriptions. Nabendu, free from anxiety, was merrily engaged in a game of cards with his sister-in-law, when Nilratan Babu came upon him with a subscription-book in his hand, and said: "Your signature, please."

When Congress was coming up, Nilratan got a message from headquarters to gather donations. Nabendu, feeling relaxed, was happily playing cards with his sister-in-law when Nilratan Babu approached him with a subscription book and said, "I need your signature, please."

From old habit Nabendu looked horrified. Labanya, assuming an air of great concern and anxiety, said: "Never do that. It would ruin your racecourse beyond repair."

From old habit, Nabendu looked horrified. Labanya, putting on a look of deep concern and worry, said, "Don't ever do that. It would completely ruin your racecourse."

Nabendu blurted out: "Do you suppose I pass sleepless nights through fear of that?"

Nabendu blurted out: "Do you really think I lie awake at night out of fear of that?"

"We won't publish your name in the papers," said Nilratan reassuringly.

"We won't publish your name in the newspapers," said Nilratan reassuringly.

Labanya, looking grave and anxious, said: "Still, it wouldn't be safe. Things spread so, from mouth to mouth—"

Labanya, looking serious and worried, said: "Still, it wouldn't be safe. Things spread so easily from person to person—"

Nabendu replied with vehemence: "My name wouldn't suffer by appearing in the newspapers." So saying, he snatched the subscription list from Nilratan's hand, and signed away a thousand rupees. Secretly he hoped that the papers would not publish the news.

Nabendu replied passionately, "My name won’t be harmed by showing up in the newspapers." With that, he snatched the subscription list from Nilratan's hand and signed away a thousand rupees. Deep down, he hoped the papers wouldn’t publish the news.

Labanya struck her forehead with her palm and gasped out: "What—have you—done?"

Labanya hit her forehead with her hand and exclaimed, "What have you done?"

"Nothing wrong," said Nabendu boastfully.

"Nothing wrong," Nabendu said proudly.

"But—but—," drawled Labanya, "the Guard sahib of Sealdah Station, the shop-assistant at Whiteaway's, the syce-sahib of Hart Bros.—these gentlemen might be angry with you, and decline to come to your Poojah dinner to drink your champagne, you know. Just think, they mightn't pat you on the back, when you meet them again!"

"But—but—," Labanya said slowly, "the Guard at Sealdah Station, the shop assistant at Whiteaway's, the stableman at Hart Bros.—these guys might get mad at you and skip your Poojah dinner to drink your champagne, you know. Just think, they might not give you a pat on the back when you see them again!"

"It wouldn't break my heart," Nabendu snapped out.

"It wouldn't break my heart," Nabendu shot back.

A few days passed. One morning Nabendu was sipping his tea, and glancing at a newspaper. Suddenly a letter signed "X" caught his eye. The writer thanked him profusely for his donation, and declared that the increase of strength the Congress had acquired by having such a man within its fold, was inestimable.

A few days went by. One morning, Nabendu was sipping his tea while glancing at a newspaper. Suddenly, a letter signed "X" caught his eye. The writer expressed heartfelt gratitude for his donation and stated that the boost in strength the Congress gained by having someone like him on board was invaluable.

Alas, father Purnendu Sekhar! Was it to increase the strength of the Congress, that you brought this wretch into the world?

Alas, father Purnendu Sekhar! Did you bring this miserable person into the world to strengthen the Congress?

Put the cloud of misfortune had its silver lining. That he was not a mere cypher was clear from the fact that the Anglo-Indian community on the one side and the Congress on the other were each waiting patiently, eager to hook him, and land him on their own side. So Nabendu, beaming with pleasure took the paper to his sister-in-law, and showed her the letter. Looking as though she knew nothing about it, Labanya exclaimed in surprise: "Oh, what a pity! Everything has come out! Who bore you such ill-will? Oh, how cruel of him, how wicked of him!"

Put the cloud of misfortune had its silver lining. It was clear he wasn’t just a nobody since both the Anglo-Indian community and the Congress were each waiting patiently, eager to win him over to their side. So, Nabendu, smiling with joy, took the paper to his sister-in-law and showed her the letter. Pretending she knew nothing about it, Labanya exclaimed in surprise, "Oh, what a pity! Everything has come out! Who has such ill-will against you? Oh, how cruel of him, how wicked of him!"

Nabendu laughed out, saying: "Now—now—don't call him names, Labanya. I forgive him with all my heart, and bless him too."

Nabendu laughed and said, "Now—now—don't insult him, Labanya. I forgive him fully and wish him well too."

A couple of days after this, an anti-Congress Anglo-Indian paper reached Nabendu through the post. There was a letter in it, signed "One who knows," and contradicting the above report. "Those who have the pleasure of Babu Nabendu Sekhar's personal acquaintance," the writer went on, "cannot for a moment believe this absurd libel to be true. For him to turn a Congresswalla is as impossible as it is for the leopard to change his spots. He is a man of genuine worth, and neither a disappointed candidate for Government employ nor a briefless barrister. He is not one of those who, after a brief sojourn in England, return aping our dress and manners, audaciously try to thrust themselves on Anglo-Indian society, and finally go back in dejection. So there is absolutely no reason why Balm Nabendu Sekhar," etc., etc.

A couple of days later, an anti-Congress Anglo-Indian newspaper arrived for Nabendu in the mail. Inside was a letter signed "One who knows," disputing the earlier report. "Anyone who knows Babu Nabendu Sekhar personally," the writer continued, "cannot possibly believe this ridiculous libel to be true. For him to become a Congress supporter is as unlikely as a leopard changing its spots. He is a person of genuine value, neither a disappointed job seeker in government nor a struggling lawyer. He is not someone who, after a short stay in England, returns trying to mimic our clothing and behaviors, brazenly attempting to insert themselves into Anglo-Indian society, only to end up going back home disheartened. So there is absolutely no reason why Balm Nabendu Sekhar," etc., etc.

Ah, father Purnendu Sekhar! What a reputation you had made with the Europeans before you died!

Ah, Father Purnendu Sekhar! What a reputation you built with the Europeans before you passed away!

This letter also was paraded before his sister-in-law, for did it not assert that he was no mean, contemptible scallywag, but a man of real worth?

This letter was also shown to his sister-in-law, because didn’t it claim that he wasn’t a worthless, contemptible loser, but a man of genuine value?

Labanya exclaimed again in feigned surprise: "Which of your friends wrote it now? Oh, come—is it the Ticket Collector, or the hide merchant, or is it the drum-major of the Fort?"

Labanya exclaimed again with fake surprise: "Which of your friends wrote it this time? Oh, come on—is it the Ticket Collector, the hide merchant, or the drum major of the Fort?"

"You ought to send in a contradiction, I think," said Nilratan.

"You should send in a contradiction, I think," said Nilratan.

"Is it necessary?" said Nabendu loftily. "Must I contradict every little thing they choose to say against me?"

"Is it really necessary?" said Nabendu with an air of superiority. "Do I have to argue with every little thing they decide to say about me?"

Labanya filled the room with a deluge of laughter. Nabendu felt a little disconcerted at this, and said: "Why? What's the matter?" She went on laughing, unable to check herself, and her youthful slender form waved to and fro. This torrent of merriment had the effect of overthrowing Nabendu completely, and he said in pitiable accents: "Do you imagine that I am afraid to contradict it?"

Labanya filled the room with a wave of laughter. Nabendu felt a bit unsettled by this and asked, "Why? What's going on?" She continued laughing, unable to stop herself, her youthful, slim figure swaying back and forth. This outburst of joy completely threw Nabendu off balance, and he said in a pitiful tone, "Do you think I'm afraid to challenge it?"

"Oh, dear, no," said Labanya; "I was thinking that you haven't yet ceased trying to save that race-course of yours, so full of promise. While there is life, there is hope, you know."

"Oh, no," said Labanya; "I was thinking that you haven't stopped trying to save that racecourse of yours, which has so much potential. As long as there's life, there's hope, you know."

"That's what I am afraid of, you think, do you? Very well, you shall see," said Nabendu desperately, and forthwith sat down to write his contradiction. When he had finished, Labanya and Nilratan read it through, and said: "It isn't strong enough. We must give it them pretty hot, mustn't we?" And they kindly undertook to revise the composition. Thus it ran: "When one connected to us by ties of blood turns our enemy he becomes far more dangerous than any outsider. To the Government of India, the haughty Anglo-Indians are worse enemies than the Russians or the frontier Pathans themselves—they are the impenetrable barrier, forever hindering the growth of any bond of friendship between the Government and people of the country. It is the Congress which has opened up the royal road to a better understanding between the rulers and the ruled, and the Anglo-Indian papers have planted themselves like thorns across the whole breadth of that road," etc., etc.

"That's what you're worried about, right? Well, you'll see," said Nabendu desperately, and immediately started writing his rebuttal. Once he finished, Labanya and Nilratan read it and said, "It's not strong enough. We need to hit them hard, don't we?" They generously took it upon themselves to revise the text. It went like this: "When someone related to us by blood becomes our enemy, they are far more dangerous than any outsider. To the Government of India, the arrogant Anglo-Indians are worse enemies than the Russians or the Pathans from the frontier—they are an impenetrable barrier, constantly obstructing the development of any friendship between the Government and the people of the country. It is the Congress that has paved the way for better understanding between the rulers and the ruled, while the Anglo-Indian newspapers have positioned themselves like thorns across that entire path," etc., etc.

Nabendu had an inward fear as to the mischief this letter might do, but at the same time he felt elated at the excellence of its composition, which he fondly imagined to be his own. It was duly published, and for some days comments, replies, and rejoinders went on in various newspapers, and the air was full of trumpet-notes, proclaiming the fact that Nabendu had joined the Congress, and the amount of his subscription.

Nabendu had a nagging worry about the trouble this letter could cause, but at the same time, he felt proud of how well it was written, believing it to be his own work. It was published, and for several days, various newspapers were filled with comments, responses, and counterarguments, loudly announcing that Nabendu had joined the Congress and sharing the amount of his contribution.

Nabendu, now grown desperate, talked as though he was a patriot of the fiercest type. Labanya laughed inwardly, and said to herself: "Well—-well—you have to pass through the ordeal of fire yet."

Nabendu, now feeling desperate, spoke as if he were the fiercest kind of patriot. Labanya quietly laughed to herself and thought, "Well—well—you still have to go through a trial by fire."

One morning when Nabendu, before his bath, had finished rubbing oil over his chest, and was trying various devices to reach the inaccessible portions of his back, the bearer brought in a card inscribed with the name of the District Magistrate himself! Good heavens!—What would he do? He could not possibly go, and receive the Magistrate Sahib, thus oil-besmeared. He shook and twitched like a koi-fish, ready dressed for the frying pan. He finished his bath in a great hurry, tugged on his clothes somehow, and ran breathlessly to the outer apartments. The bearer said that the Sahib had just left after waiting for a long time. How much of the blame for concocting this drama of invented incidents may be set down to Labanya, and how much to the bearer is a nice problem for ethical mathematics to solve.

One morning, just before his bath, Nabendu had finished rubbing oil on his chest and was awkwardly trying to reach the spots on his back that he couldn’t get to. Suddenly, the messenger came in with a card that had the name of the District Magistrate on it! What was he supposed to do? There was no way he could meet the Magistrate like this, covered in oil. He felt incredibly uneasy, like a fish ready to be cooked. He quickly finished his bath, threw on his clothes in a rush, and hurried out to the main area. The messenger informed him that the Sahib had just left after waiting for a long time. It's a tricky question to see how much of this messy situation can be blamed on Labanya and how much on the messenger, a puzzle for ethical reasoning to figure out.

Nabendu's heart was convulsed with pain within his breast, like the tail of a lizard just cut off. He moped like an owl all day long.

Nabendu's heart was twisted with pain inside him, like a lizard's tail after it's been cut off. He sulked like an owl all day long.

Labanya banished all traces of inward merriment from her face, and kept on enquiring in anxious tones: "What has happened to you? You are not ill, I hope?"

Labanya wiped any hint of happiness from her face and continued to ask anxiously, "What's wrong? I hope you're not sick?"

Nabendu made great efforts to smile, and find a humorous reply. "How can there be," he managed to say, "any illness within your jurisdiction, since you yourself are the Goddess of Health?"

Nabendu worked hard to smile and come up with a funny response. "How could there be," he finally said, "any sickness in your domain, when you are the Goddess of Health yourself?"

But the smile soon flickered out. His thoughts were: "I subscribed to the Congress fund to begin with, published a nasty letter in a newspaper, and on the top of that, when the Magistrate Sahib himself did me the honour to call on me, I kept him waiting. I wonder what he is thinking of me."

But the smile quickly faded. He thought, "I donated to the Congress fund from the start, wrote a harsh letter in a newspaper, and on top of that, when the Magistrate Sahib himself came to see me, I made him wait. I wonder what he thinks of me."

Alas, father Purnendu Sekhar, by an irony of Fate I am made to appear what I am not.

Alas, Dad Purnendu Sekhar, by an ironic twist of Fate, I’m forced to seem like someone I’m not.

The next morning, Nabendu decked himself in his best clothes, wore his watch and chain, and put a big turban on his head.

The next morning, Nabendu dressed in his best clothes, put on his watch and chain, and topped it off with a big turban.

"Where are you off to?" enquired his sister-in-law.

"Where are you going?" asked his sister-in-law.

"Urgent business," Nabendu replied. Labanya kept quiet.

"Important business," Nabendu replied. Labanya said nothing.

Arriving at the Magistrate's gate, he took out his card-case.

Arriving at the Magistrate's gate, he pulled out his wallet.

"You cannot see him now," said the orderly peon icily.

"You can't see him right now," said the orderly coldly.

Nabendu took out a couple of rupees from his pocket. The peon at once salaamed him and said: "There are five of us, sir." Immediately Nabendu pulled out a ten-rupee note, and handed it to him.

Nabendu took a couple of rupees from his pocket. The peon immediately bowed to him and said, "There are five of us, sir." Without hesitation, Nabendu pulled out a ten-rupee note and handed it to him.

He was sent for by the Magistrate, who was writing in his dressing-gown and bedroom slippers. Nabendu salaamed him. The Magistrate pointed to a chair with his finger, and without raising his eyes from the paper before him said: "What can I do for you, Babu?"

He was called in by the Magistrate, who was writing in his robe and slippers. Nabendu saluted him. The Magistrate pointed to a chair without looking up from the paper in front of him and said, "What can I do for you, Babu?"

Fingering his watch-chain nervously, Nabendu said is shaky tones: "Yesterday you were good enough to call at my place, sir—"

Fidgeting with his watch chain, Nabendu said in shaky tones: "Yesterday you were kind enough to visit my place, sir—"

The Sahib knitted his brows, and, lifting just one eye from his paper, said: "I called at your place! Babu, what nonsense are you talking?"

The Sahib furrowed his brow and, lifting one eye from his paper, said, "I stopped by your place! Babu, what nonsense are you talking about?"

"Beg your pardon, sir," faltered out Nabendu. "There has been a mistake—some confusion," and wet with perspiration, he tumbled out of the room somehow. And that night, as he lay tossing on his bed, a distant dream-like voice came into his ear with a recurring persistency: "Babu, you are a howling idiot."

"Excuse me, sir," Nabendu stammered. "There’s been a mistake—some confusion," and drenched in sweat, he hurriedly left the room. That night, as he tossed and turned in bed, a distant, dreamlike voice kept echoing in his ear: "Babu, you are a complete idiot."

On his way home, Nabendu came to the conclusion that the Magistrate denied having called, simply because he was highly offended.

On his way home, Nabendu realized that the Magistrate denied having called only because he was really offended.

So he explained to Labanya that he had been out purchasing rose-water. No sooner had he uttered the words than half-a-dozen chuprassis wearing the Collectorate badge made their appearance, and after salaaming Nabendu, stood there grinning.

So he told Labanya that he had been out buying rose water. No sooner had he said this than half a dozen attendants wearing the Collectorate badge showed up, and after bowing to Nabendu, they stood there grinning.

"Have they come to arrest you because you subscribed to the Congress fund?" whispered Labanya with a smile.

"Have they come to arrest you because you donated to the Congress fund?" Labanya whispered with a smile.

The six peons displayed a dozen rows of teeth and said: "Bakshish—Babu-Sahib."

The six workers showed a dozen rows of teeth and said, "Tip—Sir."

From a side room Nilratan came out, and said in an irritated manner: "Bakshish? What for?"

From a side room, Nilratan came out and said irritably, "Tips? What for?"

The peons, grinning as before, answered: "The Babu-Sahib went to see the Magistrate—so we have come for bakshish."

The workers, smiling like before, replied: "The Babu-Sahib went to meet the Magistrate—so we came for a tip."

"I didn't know," laughed out Labanya, "that the Magistrate was selling rose-water nowadays. Coolness wasn't the special feature of his trade before."

"I didn't know," Labanya laughed, "that the Magistrate is selling rose water these days. Coolness wasn't exactly a trademark of his business before."

Nabendu in trying to reconcile the story of his purchase with his visit to the Magistrate, uttered some incoherent words, which nobody could make sense of.

Nabendu, while trying to connect the story of his purchase with his visit to the Magistrate, spoke some jumbled words that nobody could understand.

Nilratan spoke to the peons: "There has been no occasion for bakshish; you shan't have it."

Nilratan told the workers, "There hasn't been a reason for tips; you won't get any."

Nabendu said, feeling very small: "Oh, they are poor men—what's the harm of giving them something?" And he took out a currency note. Nilratan snatched it way from Nabendu's hand, remarking: "There are poorer men in the world—I will give it to them for you."

Nabendu said, feeling very small: "Oh, they are poor men—what's the harm in giving them something?" And he took out a bill. Nilratan snatched it away from Nabendu's hand, saying: "There are poorer men in the world—I’ll give it to them for you."

Nabendu felt greatly distressed that he was not able to appease these ghostly retainers of the angry Siva. When the peons were leaving, with thunder in their eyes, he looked at them languishingly, as much as to say: "You know everything, gentlemen, it is not my fault."

Nabendu felt really upset that he couldn't placate these ghostly followers of the angry Siva. As the workers were leaving, with fury in their eyes, he looked at them longingly, as if to say: "You know everything, guys, it's not my fault."

The Congress was to be held at Calcutta this year. Nilratan went down thither with his wife to attend the sittings. Nabendu accompanied them.

The Congress was set to take place in Calcutta this year. Nilratan went there with his wife to attend the sessions. Nabendu joined them.

As soon as they arrived at Calcutta, the Congress party surrounded Nabendu, and their delight and enthusiasm knew no bounds. They cheered him, honoured him, and extolled him up to the skies. Everybody said that, unless leading men like Nabendu devoted themselves to the Cause, there was no hope for the country. Nabendu was disposed to agree with them, and emerged out of the chaos of mistake and confusion as a leader of the country. When he entered the Congress Pavilion on the first day, everybody stood up, and shouted "Hip, hip, hurrah," in a loud outlandish voice, hearing which our Motherland reddened with shame to the root of her ears.

As soon as they got to Calcutta, the Congress party flocked around Nabendu, and their excitement and joy were off the charts. They cheered for him, honored him, and sang his praises to the heavens. Everyone said that unless prominent figures like Nabendu dedicated themselves to the Cause, there was no hope for the country. Nabendu was inclined to agree with them and emerged from the mess of confusion and mistakes as a leader of the nation. When he walked into the Congress Pavilion on the first day, everyone stood up and shouted "Hip, hip, hurrah!" in a loud, exaggerated voice, which made our Motherland blush with embarrassment.

In due time the Queen's birthday came, and Nabendu's name was not found in the list of Rai Bahadurs.

In due time, the Queen's birthday arrived, and Nabendu's name was missing from the list of Rai Bahadurs.

He received an invitation from Labanya for that evening. When he arrived there, Labanya with great pomp and ceremony presented him with a robe of honour, and with her own hand put a mark of red sandal paste on the middle of his forehead. Each of the other sisters threw round his neck a garland of flowers woven by herself. Decked in a pink Sari and dazzling jewels, his wife Arunlekha was waiting in a side room, her face lit up with smiles and blushes. Her sisters rushed to her, and, placing another garland in her hand, insisted that she also should come, and do her part in the ceremony, but she would not listen to it; and that principal garland, cherishing a desire for Nabendu's neck, waited patiently for the still secrecy of midnight.

He got an invitation from Labanya for that evening. When he showed up, Labanya, full of excitement, presented him with a robe of honor and personally applied a mark of red sandalwood paste on his forehead. Each of the other sisters placed a flower garland that she had made around his neck. Dressed in a pink sari and sparkling jewels, his wife Arunlekha was waiting in a side room, her face glowing with smiles and blushes. Her sisters rushed to her, giving her another garland and insisting that she join in the ceremony, but she refused to hear it; that main garland, hoping for Nabendu’s neck, patiently waited for the quiet of midnight.

The sisters said to Nabendu: "To-day we crown thee King. Such honour will not be done to any body else in Hindoostan."

The sisters said to Nabendu: "Today we crown you King. No one else in Hindustan will receive such an honor."

Whether Nabendu derived any consolation from this, he alone can tell; but we greatly doubt it. We believe, in fact, that he will become a Rai Bahadur before he has done, and the Englishman and the Pioneer will write heart-rending articles lamenting his demise at the proper time. So, in the meanwhile, Three Cheers for Babu Purnendu Sekhar! Hip, hip, hurrah—Hip, hip, hurrah—Hip, hip, hurrah.

Whether Nabendu found any comfort in this, only he knows; but we seriously doubt it. In fact, we believe he will become a Rai Bahadur before it’s all over, and the Englishman and the Pioneer will write heartbreaking articles mourning his loss when the time comes. So, in the meantime, Three Cheers for Babu Purnendu Sekhar! Hip, hip, hurrah—Hip, hip, hurrah—Hip, hip, hurrah.





THE RENUNCIATION

I

It was a night of full moon early in the month of Phalgun. The youthful spring was everywhere sending forth its breeze laden with the fragrance of mango-blossoms. The melodious notes of an untiring papiya (One of the sweetest songsters in Bengal. Anglo-Indian writers have nicknamed it the "brain-fever bird," which is a sheer libel.), concealed within the thick foliage of an old lichi tree by the side of a tank, penetrated a sleepless bedroom of the Mukerji family. There Hemanta now restlessly twisted a lock of his wife's hair round his finger, now beat her churl against her wristlet until it tinkled, now pulled at the chaplet of flowers about her head, and left it hanging over hex face. His mood was that of as evening breeze which played about a favourite flowering shrub, gently shaking her now this side, now that, in the hope of rousing her to animation.

It was a full moon night early in the month of Phalgun. The fresh spring was all around, sending a breeze filled with the scent of mango blossoms. The sweet melody of an endless papiya (one of the sweetest songbirds in Bengal. Anglo-Indian writers have nicknamed it the "brain-fever bird," which is completely unfair) came from the dense foliage of an old lichi tree by the tank, filling the sleepless bedroom of the Mukerji family. There, Hemanta restlessly twisted a lock of his wife's hair around his finger, lightly tapped her wristlet until it tinkled, and tugged at the flower garland in her hair, leaving it dangling over her face. His mood resembled an evening breeze, playfully moving around a favorite flowering shrub, gently shaking her this way and that, hoping to wake her up.

But Kusum sat motionless, looking out of the open window, with eyes immersed in the moonlit depth of never-ending space beyond. Her husband's caresses were lost on her.

But Kusum sat still, gazing out of the open window, her eyes absorbed in the moonlit expanse of endless space beyond. She didn't notice her husband's touches.

At last Hemanta clasped both the hands of his wife, and, shaking them gently, said: "Kusum, where are you? A patient search through a big telescope would reveal you only as a small speck-you seem to have receded so far away. O, do come closer to me, dear. See how beautiful the night is."

At last, Hemanta took his wife's hands in his and, shaking them gently, said: "Kusum, where are you? A careful search through a big telescope would show you as just a tiny dot—you seem to have moved so far away. Oh, please come closer to me, dear. Look how beautiful the night is."

Kusum turned her eyes from the void of space towards her husband, and said slowly: "I know a mantra (A set of magic words.), which could in one moment shatter this spring night and the moon into pieces."

Kusum looked away from the emptiness of space and towards her husband, and said slowly, "I know a mantra (a set of magic words) that could shatter this spring night and the moon into pieces in an instant."

"If you do," laughed Hemanta, "pray don't utter it. If any mantra of yours could bring three or four Saturdays during the week, and prolong the nights till 5 P.M. the next day, say it by all means."

"If you do," laughed Hemanta, "please don't say it out loud. If any of your mantras could add three or four Saturdays to the week and make the nights last until 5 PM the next day, go ahead and share it."

Saying this, he tried to draw his wife a little closer to him. Kusum, freeing herself from the embrace, said: "Do you know, to-night I feel a longing to tell you what I promised to reveal only on my death-bed. To-night I feel that I could endure whatever punishment you might inflict on me."

Saying this, he tried to pull his wife a little closer to him. Kusum, pulling away from his embrace, said: "You know, tonight I feel a strong urge to tell you what I promised to reveal only on my deathbed. Tonight, I feel like I could handle whatever punishment you might give me."

Hemanta was on the point of making a jest about punishments by reciting a verse from Jayadeva, when the sound of an angry pair of slippers was heard approaching rapidly. They were the familiar footsteps of his father, Haribar Mukerji, and Hemanta, not knowing what it meant, was in a flutter of excitement.

Hemanta was just about to make a joke about punishments by quoting a verse from Jayadeva when he heard the angry sound of slippers coming his way. It was the unmistakable footsteps of his father, Haribar Mukerji, and Hemanta, unsure of what was happening, felt a rush of excitement.

Standing outside the door Harihar roared out: "Hemanta, turn your wife out of the house immediately."

Standing outside the door, Harihar shouted, "Hemanta, get your wife out of the house right now."

Hemanta looked at his wife, and detected no trace of surprise in her features. She merely buried her face within the palms of her hands, and, with all the strength and intensity of her soul, wished that she could then and there melt into nothingness. It was the same papiya whose song floated into the room with the south breeze, and no one heard it. Endless are the beauties of the earth-but alas, how easily everything is twisted out of shape.

Hemanta looked at his wife and saw no sign of surprise on her face. She simply buried her face in her hands and, with all her heart and soul, wished she could just disappear. It was the same papiya whose song drifted into the room with the southern breeze, though no one heard it. There are countless beauties in the world—yet, sadly, everything can so easily be distorted.

II

II

Returning from without, Hemanta asked his wife: "Is it true?"

Returning from outside, Hemanta asked his wife, "Is it true?"

"It is," replied Kusum.

"It's true," replied Kusum.

"Why didn't you tell me long ago?"

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I did try many a time, and I always failed. I am a wretched woman."

"I tried many times, and I always failed. I am a miserable woman."

"Then tell me everything now."

"Then tell me everything."

Kusum gravely told her story in a firm unshaken voice. She waded barefooted through fire, as it were, with slow unflinching steps, and nobody knew how much she was scorched. Having heard her to the end, Hemanta rose and walked out.

Kusum seriously shared her story in a steady, unwavering voice. She walked barefoot through fire, so to speak, with slow, steady steps, and no one knew how much she had been burned. After listening to her until she finished, Hemanta stood up and walked out.

Kusum thought that her husband had gone, never to return to her again. It did not strike her as strange. She took it as naturally as any other incident of everyday life-so dry and apathetic had her mind become during the last few moments. Only the world and love seemed to her as a void and make-believe from beginning to end. Even the memory of the protestations of love, which her husband had made to her in days past, brought to her lips a dry, hard, joyless smile, like a sharp cruel knife which had cut through her heart. She was thinking, perhaps, that the love which seemed to fill so much of one's life, which brought in its train such fondness and depth of feeling, which made even the briefest separation so exquisitely painful and a moment's union so intensely sweet, which seemed boundless in its extent and eternal in its duration, the cessation of which could not be imagined even in births to come—that this was that love! So feeble was its support! No sooner does the priesthood touch it than your "eternal" love crumbles into a handful of dust! Only a short while ago Hemanta had whispered to her: "What a beautiful night!" The same night was not yet at an end, the same yapiya was still warbling, the same south breeze still blew into the roam, making the bed-curtain shiver; the same moonlight lay on the bed next the open window, sleeping like a beautiful heroine exhausted with gaiety. All this was unreal! Love was more falsely dissembling than she herself!

Kusum thought her husband was gone for good. It didn't seem strange to her. She accepted it as naturally as any other everyday event—her mind had become so dry and indifferent in just the last few moments. The world and love felt like a void, a complete illusion from start to finish. Even the memories of her husband's declarations of love from the past brought a dry, hard, joyless smile to her lips, like a sharp knife cutting through her heart. She was possibly realizing that the love which seemed to fill so much of life, bringing warmth and deep feelings, which made even the shortest separation unbearably painful and a moment together so intensely sweet, which appeared limitless and eternal, that losing it could never even be imagined beyond this life—that this was that love! Its foundation was so weak! As soon as the priesthood touched it, your "eternal" love crumbled to dust! Just a little while ago, Hemanta had whispered to her, "What a beautiful night!" The same night wasn't over yet, the same yapiya was still singing, the same gentle breeze was still wafting through the room, making the bed curtain shiver; the same moonlight lay on the bed by the open window, still like a beautiful heroine worn out from joy. All of this felt unreal! Love was more deceitful than she herself!

III

III

The next morning Hemanta, fagged after a sleepless night, and looking like one distracted, called at the house of Peari Sankar Ghosal. "What news, my son?" Peari Sankar greeted him.

The next morning, Hemanta, exhausted after a sleepless night and looking a bit frazzled, stopped by the house of Peari Sankar Ghosal. "What’s the news, my son?" Peari Sankar greeted him.

Hemanta, flaring up like a big fire, said in a trembling voice: "You have defiled our caste. You have brought destruction upon us. And you will have to pay for it." He could say no more; he felt choked.

Hemanta, burning with anger, said in a shaky voice: "You have dishonored our caste. You have brought ruin upon us. And you will have to face the consequences." He couldn't say anything else; he felt overwhelmed.

"And you have preserved my caste, presented my ostracism from the community, and patted me on the back affectionately!" said Peari Sankar with a slight sarcastic smile.

"And you've kept my social status intact, highlighted my exclusion from the community, and given me an affectionate pat on the back!" said Peari Sankar with a slight sarcastic smile.

Hemanta wished that his Brahmin-fury could reduce Peari Sankar to ashes in a moment, but his rage burnt only himself. Peari Sankar sat before him unscathed, and in the best of health.

Hemanta wished that his Brahmin rage could turn Peari Sankar to ashes in an instant, but his anger only consumed him. Peari Sankar sat in front of him, unhurt and in great health.

"Did I ever do you any harm?" demanded Hemanta in a broken voice.

"Did I ever hurt you?" Hemanta asked in a trembling voice.

"Let me ask you one question," said Peari Sankar. "My daughter—my only child-what harm had she done your father? You were very young then, and probably never heard. Listen, then. Now, don't you excite yourself. There is much humour in what I am going to relate.

"Let me ask you something," said Peari Sankar. "My daughter—my only child—what harm did she do to your father? You were very young back then and probably never heard about it. So listen up. Now, don’t get too upset. There’s a lot of humor in what I’m about to share."

"You were quite small when my son-in-law Nabakanta ran away to England after stealing my daughter's jewels. You might truly remember the commotion in the village when he returned as a barrister five years later. Or, perhaps, you were unaware of it, as you were at school in Calcutta at the time. Your father, arrogating to himself the headship of the community, declared that if I sent my daughter to her husband's home, I must renounce her for good, and never again allow her to cross my threshold. I fell at your father's feet, and implored him, saying: 'Brother, save me this once. I will make the boy swallow cow-dung, and go through the prayaschittam ceremony. Do take him back into caste.' But your father remained obdurate. For my part, I could not disown my only child, and, bidding good-bye to my village and my kinsmen, I betook myself to Calcutta. There, too, my troubles followed me. When I had made every arrangement for my nephew's marriage, your father stirred up the girl's people, and they broke the match off. Then I took a solemn vow that, if there was a drop of Brahmin blood flowing in my veins, I would avenge myself. You understand the business to some extent now, don't you? But wait a little longer. You will enjoy it, when I tell you the whole story; it is interesting.

You were really young when my son-in-law Nabakanta ran away to England after stealing my daughter's jewelry. You might actually remember the chaos in the village when he returned as a barrister five years later. Or maybe you didn't notice it, since you were at school in Calcutta at the time. Your dad, taking charge of the community, declared that if I sent my daughter to her husband's house, I would have to cut ties with her for good and never let her come back. I fell at your father's feet and begged him, saying: 'Brother, please save me this time. I’ll make the boy do a cleansing ritual. Just let him back into the community.' But your dad wouldn't budge. I couldn't disown my only child, so I said goodbye to my village and my relatives and moved to Calcutta. Even there, my problems followed me. When I had everything set for my nephew’s wedding, your father got the girl’s family involved and they called off the match. Then I made a serious vow that if I had any Brahmin blood in me, I would get my revenge. You understand the situation a bit better now, don’t you? But hang on a bit longer. You'll really enjoy it when I share the whole story; it’s quite interesting.

"When you were attending college, one Bipradas Chatterji used to live next door to your lodgings. The poor fellow is dead now. In his house lived a child-widow called Kusum, the destitute orphan of a Kayestha gentleman. The girl was very pretty, and the old Brahmin desired to shield her from the hungry gaze of college students. But for a young girl to throw dust in the eyes of her old guardian was not at all a difficult task. She often went to the top of the roof, to hang her washing out to dry, and, I believe, you found your own roof best suited for your studies. Whether you two spoke to each other, when on your respective roofs, I cannot tell, but the girl's behaviour excited suspicion in the old man's mind. She made frequent mistakes in her household duties, and, like Parbati (The wife of Shiva the Destroyer), engaged in her devotions, began gradually to renounce food and sleep. Some evenings she would burst into tears in the presence of the old gentleman, without any apparent reason.

"When you were in college, a guy named Bipradas Chatterji lived next door to your place. Sadly, he has passed away now. In his house lived a young widow named Kusum, a poor orphan from a Kayestha family. The girl was really attractive, and the old Brahmin wanted to protect her from the prying eyes of college students. However, it wasn’t hard for a young girl to play tricks on her old guardian. She often went up to the roof to hang her laundry, and I believe you found your own roof to be the best spot for studying. I can’t say whether you two talked while on your roofs, but the way she acted raised suspicions in the old man. She frequently messed up her household chores, and like Parbati (the wife of Shiva the Destroyer), she began to neglect food and sleep while lost in her prayers. Some evenings, she would suddenly break down in tears in front of the old gentleman for no clear reason."

"At last he discovered that you two saw each other from the roofs pretty frequently, and that you even went the length of absenting yourself from college to sit on the roof at mid-day with a book in your hand, so fond had you grown suddenly of solitary study. Bipradas came to me for advice, and told me everything. 'Uncle,' said I to him, 'for a long while you have cherished a desire to go on a pilgrimage to Benares. You had better do it now, and leave the girl in my charge. I will take care of her.'

"Finally, he found out that you two were meeting on the rooftops pretty often, and that you even skipped college to sit up there at midday with a book in your hand, so suddenly interested you were in studying alone. Bipradas came to me for advice and told me everything. 'Uncle,' I said to him, 'you've wanted to go on a pilgrimage to Benares for a while now. You should do it now and leave the girl in my care. I’ll look after her.'”

"So he went. I lodged the girl in the house of Sripati Chatterji, passing him off as her father. What happened next is known to you. I feel a great relief to-day, having told you everything from the beginning. It sounds like a romance, doesn't it? I think of turning it into a book, and getting it printed. But I am not a writing-man myself. They say my nephew has some aptitude that way—I will get him to write it for me. But the best thing would be, if you would collaborate with him, because the conclusion of the story is not known to me so well."

"So he left. I put the girl in the house of Sripati Chatterji, passing him off as her father. What happened next is already known to you. I feel a huge relief today, having shared everything from the start. It sounds like a romantic story, doesn’t it? I'm thinking of turning it into a book and getting it published. But I’m not much of a writer myself. They say my nephew has a knack for it—I’ll ask him to write it for me. But the best option would be if you could collaborate with him, because I’m not too clear on how the story ends."

Without paying much attention to the concluding remarks of Peari Sankar, Hemanta asked: "Did not Kusum object to this marriage?"

Without paying much attention to Peari Sankar's final comments, Hemanta asked, "Didn't Kusum have an issue with this marriage?"

"Well," said Peari Sankar, "it is very difficult to guess. You know, my boy, how women's minds are constituted. When they say 'no,' they mean 'yes.' During the first few days after her removal to the new home, she went almost crazy at not seeing you. You, too, seemed to have discovered her new address somehow, as you used to lose your way after starting for college, and loiter about in front of Sripati's house. Your eyes did not appear to be exactly in search of the Presidency College, as they were directed towards the barred windows of a private house, through which nothing but insects and the hearts of moon-struck young men could obtain access. I felt very sorry for you both. I could see that your studies were being seriously interrupted, and that the plight of the girl was pitiable also.

"Well," said Peari Sankar, "it's really hard to guess. You know how women think. When they say 'no,' they actually mean 'yes.' In the first few days after she moved to her new home, she was almost going crazy not seeing you. You seemed to have found out her new address somehow, since you would often get lost on your way to college and hang around in front of Sripati's house. Your eyes didn’t really seem to be looking for Presidency College; they were focused on the barred windows of that private house, where only insects and lovesick young men could get in. I felt really bad for both of you. I could see your studies were suffering, and the girl's situation was also quite sad."

"One day I called Kusum to me, and said: 'Listen to me, my daughter. I am an old man, and you need feel no delicacy in my presence. I know whom you desire at heart. The young man's condition is hopeless too. I wish I could bring about your union.' At this Kusum suddenly melted into tears, and ran away. On several evenings after that, I visited Sripati's house, and, calling Kusum to me, discussed with her matters relating to you, and so I succeeded in gradually overcoming her shyness. At last, when I said that I would try to bring about a marriage, she asked me: 'How can it be?' 'Never mind,' I said, 'I would pass you off as a Brahmin maiden.' After a good deal of argument, she begged me to find out whether you would approve of it. 'What nonsense,' replied I, 'the boy is well-nigh mad as it were, what's the use of disclosing all these complications to him? Let the ceremony be over smoothly and then—all's well that ends well. Especially, as there is not the slightest risk of its ever leaking out, why go out of the way to make a fellow miserable for life?'

"One day I called Kusum to me and said, 'Listen, my daughter. I'm an old man, and you don't need to feel awkward around me. I know who you truly want. The young man's situation is hopeless too. I wish I could help you two be together.' Hearing this, Kusum suddenly burst into tears and ran away. For several evenings after that, I went to Sripati's house, and calling Kusum over, I talked to her about you, gradually helping her overcome her shyness. Finally, when I said I would try to arrange a marriage, she asked me, 'How can that happen?' 'Don't worry,' I said, 'I could pass you off as a Brahmin girl.' After a fair bit of discussion, she asked me to find out if you would be okay with it. 'What nonsense,' I replied, 'the boy is nearly mad as it is, what's the point of telling him about all these complications? Let's just get through the ceremony smoothly, and then everything will be fine. Especially since there's no chance of it ever getting out, why make a guy unhappy for life?'”

"I do not know whether the plan had Kusum's assent or not. At times she wept, and at other times she remained silent. If I said, 'Let us drop it then,' she would become very restless. When things were in this state, I sent Sripati to you with the proposal of marriage; you consented without a moment's hesitation. Everything was settled.

"I don't know if Kusum agreed to the plan or not. Sometimes she cried, and other times she was quiet. If I said, 'Let's just forget it,' she would get very uneasy. While things were like this, I sent Sripati to you with the marriage proposal; you agreed without a second thought. Everything was finalized."

"Shortly before the day fixed, Kusum became so obstinate that I had the greatest difficulty in bringing her round again. 'Do let it drop, uncle,' she said to me constantly. 'What do you mean, you silly child,' I rebuked her,' how can we back out now, when everything has been settled?'

"Shortly before the set day, Kusum became so stubborn that I had a really hard time getting her to come around again. 'Please just drop it, uncle,' she kept saying to me. 'What are you talking about, you silly child?' I scolded her. 'How can we back out now, especially since everything has already been arranged?'"

"'Spread a rumour that I am dead,' she implored. 'Send me away somewhere.'

"'Spread a rumor that I'm dead,' she pleaded. 'Send me away somewhere.'"

"'What would happen to the young man then?' said I.' He is now in the seventh heaven of delight, expecting that his long cherished desire would be fulfilled to-morrow; and to-day you want me to send him the news of your death. The result would be that to-morrow I should have to bear the news of his death to you, and the same evening your death would be reported to me. Do you imagine, child, that I am capable of committing a girl-murder and a Brahmin-murder at my age?'

"'What would happen to the young man then?' I asked. 'He's in a state of pure joy, expecting that his long-held dream will come true tomorrow; and today you want me to tell him about your death. The consequence would be that tomorrow I’d have to bring him the news of your death, and then that same evening I'd hear about his death. Do you really think, child, that I’m capable of committing a murder of a girl and a Brahmin at my age?'"

"Eventually the happy marriage was celebrated at the auspicious moment, and I felt relieved of a burdensome duty which I owed to myself. What happened afterwards you know best."

"Eventually, the joyful marriage took place at just the right time, and I felt free from a heavy obligation I had to myself. What happened next, you know better than anyone."

"Couldn't you stop after having done us an irreparable injury?" burst out Hemanta after a short silence. "Why have you told the secret now?"

"Couldn't you stop after you did us an irreparable injury?" Hemanta exclaimed after a brief silence. "Why did you reveal the secret now?"

With the utmost composure, Peari Sankar replied: "When I saw that all arrangements had been made for the wedding of your sister, I said to myself: 'Well, I have fouled the caste of one Brahmin, but that was only from a sense of duty. Here, another Brahmin's caste is imperilled, and this time it is my plain duty to prevent it.' So I wrote to them saying that I was in a position to prove that you had taken the daughter of a sudra to wife."

With complete calm, Peari Sankar said, "When I noticed that everything was set for your sister's wedding, I thought to myself: 'I may have tarnished the caste of one Brahmin, but that was only out of a sense of duty. Now, another Brahmin's caste is at risk, and this time it's my responsibility to stop it.' So, I wrote to them saying that I could prove you had married the daughter of a sudra."

Controlling himself with a gigantic effort, Hemanta said: "What will become of this girl whom I shall abandon now? Would you give her food and shelter?"

Controlling himself with a massive effort, Hemanta said: "What will happen to this girl I’m about to leave? Will you provide her with food and a place to stay?"

"I have done what was mine to do," replied Peari Sankar calmly. "It is no part of my duty to look after the discarded wives of other people. Anybody there? Get a glass of cocoanut milk for Hemanta Babu with ice in it. And some pan too."

"I've done what I needed to do," Peari Sankar replied calmly. "It's not my responsibility to take care of other people's discarded wives. Is anyone there? Please get a glass of coconut milk with ice for Hemanta Babu. And also some paan."

Hemanta rose, and took his departure without waiting for this luxurious hospitality.

Hemanta got up and left without waiting for this lavish hospitality.

IV

IV

It was the fifth night of the waning of the moon—and the night was dark. No birds were singing. The lichi tree by the tank looked like a smudge of ink on a background a shade less deep. The south wind was blindly roaming about in the darkness like a sleep-walker. The stars in the sky with vigilant unblinking eyes were trying to penetrate the darkness, in their effort to fathom some profound mystery.

It was the fifth night of the waning moon—and it was dark. No birds were singing. The lichi tree by the tank looked like a dark stain against a backdrop just a bit lighter. The south wind wandered through the darkness like a sleepwalker. The stars in the sky, with their watchful, unblinking eyes, were trying to pierce the darkness, attempting to uncover some deep mystery.

No light shone in the bedroom. Hemanta was sitting on the side of the bed next the open window, gazing at the darkness in front of him. Kusum lay on the floor, clasping her husband's feet with both her arms, and her face resting on them. Time stood like an ocean hushed into stillness. On the background of eternal night, Fate seemed to have painted this one single picture for all time—annihilation on every side, the judge in the centre of it, and the guilty one at his feet.

No light lit up the bedroom. Hemanta was sitting on the edge of the bed by the open window, staring into the darkness ahead of him. Kusum lay on the floor, wrapping her arms around her husband's feet, her face resting on them. Time felt frozen, as if it were an ocean completely still. Against the backdrop of endless night, Fate seemed to have created this one image for eternity—destruction on every side, the judge in the center, and the guilty one at his feet.

The sound of slippers was heard again. Approaching the door, Harihar Mukerji said: "You have had enough time,—I can't allow you more. Turn the girl out of the house."

The sound of slippers was heard again. Approaching the door, Harihar Mukerji said, "You've had enough time — I can't give you any more. Get the girl out of the house."

Kusum, as she heard this, embraced her husband's feet with all the ardour of a lifetime, covered them with kisses, and touching her forehead to them reverentially, withdrew herself.

Kusum, upon hearing this, hugged her husband's feet with all the passion of a lifetime, showered them with kisses, and, touching her forehead to them respectfully, stepped back.

Hemanta rose, and walking to the door, said: "Father, I won't forsake my wife."

Hemanta stood up, walked to the door, and said, "Dad, I won't abandon my wife."

"What!" roared out Harihar, "would you lose your caste, sir?"

"What!" yelled Harihar, "are you really going to throw away your caste, sir?"

"I don't care for caste," was Hemanta's calm reply.

"I don't care about caste," was Hemanta's calm reply.

"Then you too I renounce."

"Then I renounce you too."





THE CABULIWALLAH

(THE FRUITSELLER FROM CABUL)

My five years' old daughter Mini cannot live without chattering. I really believe that in all her life she has not wasted a minute in silence. Her mother is often vexed at this, and would stop her prattle, but I would not. To see Mini quiet is unnatural, and I cannot bear it long. And so my own talk with her is always lively.

My five-year-old daughter Mini can't go without talking. I honestly think she's never spent a minute in silence her entire life. Her mom often gets annoyed with this and tries to get her to stop chatting, but I don't. Seeing Mini quiet feels unnatural to me, and I can't handle it for long. So, our conversations are always full of energy.

One morning, for instance, when I was in the midst of the seventeenth chapter of my new novel, my little Mini stole into the room, and putting her hand into mine, said: "Father! Ramdayal the door-keeper calls a crow a krow! He doesn't know anything, does he?"

One morning, for example, while I was deep into the seventeenth chapter of my new novel, my little Mini came into the room, took my hand, and said: "Dad! Ramdayal the doorkeeper calls a crow a krow! He doesn’t know anything, does he?"

Before I could explain to her the differences of language in this world, she was embarked on the full tide of another subject. "What do you think, Father? Bhola says there is an elephant in the clouds, blowing water out of his trunk, and that is why it rains!"

Before I could explain to her the differences in language in this world, she had already jumped into another topic. "What do you think, Dad? Bhola says there’s an elephant in the clouds, blowing water out of its trunk, and that’s why it rains!"

And then, darting off anew, while I sat still making ready some reply to this last saying, "Father! what relation is Mother to you?"

And then, suddenly taking off again, while I sat there trying to come up with a response to this last comment, "Dad! What is Mom to you?"

"My dear little sister in the law!" I murmured involuntarily to myself, but with a grave face contrived to answer: "Go and play with Bhola, Mini! I am busy!"

"My dear little sister-in-law!" I muttered to myself without thinking, but keeping a serious expression, I managed to reply: "Go play with Bhola, Mini! I’m busy!"

The window of my room overlooks the road. The child had seated herself at my feet near my table, and was playing softly, drumming on her knees. I was hard at work on my seventeenth chapter, where Protrap Singh, the hero, had just caught Kanchanlata, the heroine, in his arms, and was about to escape with her by the third story window of the castle, when all of a sudden Mini left her play, and ran to the window, crying, "A Cabuliwallah! a Cabuliwallah!" Sure enough in the street below was a Cabuliwallah, passing slowly along. He wore the loose soiled clothing of his people, with a tall turban; there was a bag on his back, and he carried boxes of grapes in his hand.

The window of my room looks out onto the road. The child had settled herself at my feet by the table, playing quietly and drumming on her knees. I was focused on my seventeenth chapter, where Protrap Singh, the hero, had just caught Kanchanlata, the heroine, in his arms, and was about to escape with her through the third-story window of the castle, when suddenly Mini stopped playing and ran to the window, shouting, "A Cabuliwallah! A Cabuliwallah!" Sure enough, down in the street was a Cabuliwallah, walking slowly. He wore the loose, dirty clothes typical of his people, with a tall turban; he had a bag on his back and was carrying boxes of grapes in his hands.

I cannot tell what were my daughter's feelings at the sight of this man, but she began to call him loudly. "Ah!" I thought, "he will come in, and my seventeenth chapter will never be finished!" At which exact moment the Cabuliwallah turned, and looked up at the child. When she saw this, overcome by terror, she fled to her mother's protection, and disappeared. She had a blind belief that inside the bag, which the big man carried, there were perhaps two or three other children like herself. The pedlar meanwhile entered my doorway, and greeted me with a smiling face.

I can't say what my daughter's feelings were when she saw this man, but she started calling out to him loudly. "Oh no!" I thought, "he's going to come in, and I'll never finish my seventeenth chapter!" At that moment, the Cabuliwallah turned and looked at the child. When she saw him, she was so scared that she ran to her mother's side and disappeared. She had a naive belief that inside the bag the big man carried, there might be two or three other kids just like her. Meanwhile, the pedlar walked into my doorway, smiling at me.

So precarious was the position of my hero and my heroine, that my first impulse was to stop and buy something, since the man had been called. I made some small purchases, and a conversation began about Abdurrahman, the Russians, she English, and the Frontier Policy.

So uncertain was the situation of my hero and heroine that my first instinct was to pause and buy something, given that the man had been called. I made a few small purchases, and a conversation started about Abdurrahman, the Russians, the English, and the Frontier Policy.

As he was about to leave, he asked: "And where is the little girl, sir?"

As he was about to leave, he asked, "So, where's the little girl, sir?"

And I, thinking that Mini must get rid of her false fear, had her brought out.

And I, believing that Mini needed to overcome her unfounded fear, had her brought out.

She stood by my chair, and looked at the Cabuliwallah and his bag. He offered her nuts and raisins, but she would not be tempted, and only clung the closer to me, with all her doubts increased.

She stood by my chair and looked at the Cabuliwallah and his bag. He offered her nuts and raisins, but she wasn't tempted and just held on to me tighter, her doubts growing.

This was their first meeting.

This was their first meetup.

One morning, however, not many days later, as I was leaving the house, I was startled to find Mini, seated on a bench near the door, laughing and talking, with the great Cabuliwallah at her feet. In all her life, it appeared; my small daughter had never found so patient a listener, save her father. And already the corner of her little sari was stuffed with almonds and raisins, the gift of her visitor, "Why did you give her those?" I said, and taking out an eight-anna bit, I handed it to him. The man accepted the money without demur, and slipped it into his pocket.

One morning, not long after, as I was leaving the house, I was surprised to see Mini sitting on a bench by the door, laughing and chatting with the great Cabuliwallah at her feet. It seemed that in her entire life, my little daughter had never found such a patient listener, except for her father. Already, the edge of her little sari was filled with almonds and raisins, gifts from her visitor. “Why did you give her those?” I asked, and taking out an eight-anna coin, I handed it to him. He accepted the money without hesitation and put it in his pocket.

Alas, on my return an hour later, I found the unfortunate coin had made twice its own worth of trouble! For the Cabuliwallah had given it to Mini, and her mother catching sight of the bright round object, had pounced on the child with: "Where did you get that eight-anna bit?"

Alas, when I got back an hour later, I discovered that the unfortunate coin had caused twice as much trouble as it was worth! The Cabuliwallah had given it to Mini, and when her mother saw the shiny round object, she quickly confronted the child with, "Where did you get that eight-anna coin?"

"The Cabuliwallah gave it me," said Mini cheerfully.

"The Cabuliwallah gave it to me," Mini said happily.

"The Cabuliwallah gave it you!" cried her mother much shocked. "Oh, Mini! how could you take it from him?"

"The Cabuliwallah gave it to you!" her mother exclaimed, clearly shocked. "Oh, Mini! How could you take it from him?"

I, entering at the moment, saved her from impending disaster, and proceeded to make my own inquiries.

I walked in just in time to save her from disaster and then started to ask my own questions.

It was not the first or second time, I found, that the two had met. The Cabuliwallah had overcome the child's first terror by a judicious bribery of nuts and almonds, and the two were now great friends.

It wasn't the first or second time, I realized, that the two had met. The Cabuliwallah had won over the child's initial fear with a smart bribe of nuts and almonds, and they were now good friends.

They had many quaint jokes, which afforded them much amusement. Seated in front of him, looking down on his gigantic frame in all her tiny dignity, Mini would ripple her face with laughter, and begin: "O Cabuliwallah, Cabuliwallah, what have you got in your bag?"

They had a lot of funny jokes that made them laugh. Sitting in front of him, looking down at his huge figure with all her little dignity, Mini would break into laughter and say, "Oh Cabuliwallah, Cabuliwallah, what do you have in your bag?"

And he would reply, in the nasal accents of the mountaineer: "An elephant!" Not much cause for merriment, perhaps; but how they both enjoyed the witticism! And for me, this child's talk with a grown-up man had always in it something strangely fascinating.

And he would respond, in the nasal tone of a mountain person: "An elephant!" Not exactly a laugh riot, maybe; but they both found it hilarious! And for me, this child's conversation with an adult always had something oddly captivating about it.

Then the Cabuliwallah, not to be behindhand, would take his turn: "Well, little one, and when are you going to the father-in-law's house?"

Then the Cabuliwallah, eager not to be left out, took his turn: "So, little one, when are you going to your father-in-law's house?"

Now most small Bengali maidens have heard long ago about the father-in-law's house; but we, being a little new-fangled, had kept these things from our child, and Mini at this question must have been a trifle bewildered. But she would not show it, and with ready tact replied: "Are you going there?"

Now most young Bengali women have heard about the father-in-law's house a long time ago; but we, being a bit modern, had kept this information from our child, and Mini must have felt a little confused by the question. But she didn’t let it show, and with quick thinking replied, "Are you going there?"

Amongst men of the Cabuliwallah's class, however, it is well known that the words father-in-law's house have a double meaning. It is a euphemism for jail, the place where we are well cared for, at no expense to ourselves. In this sense would the sturdy pedlar take my daughter's question. "Ah," he would say, shaking his fist at an invisible policeman, "I will thrash my father-in-law!" Hearing this, and picturing the poor discomfited relative, Mini would go off into peals of laughter, in which her formidable friend would join.

Among men like the Cabuliwallah, it’s widely understood that the term father-in-law's house has a double meaning. It’s a euphemism for jail, a place where we’re taken care of, at no cost to us. This is how the sturdy peddler would interpret my daughter's question. "Ah," he would say, shaking his fist at an imaginary policeman, "I will thrash my father-in-law!" Upon hearing this and picturing the poor, flustered relative, Mini would burst into laughter, with her formidable friend joining in.

These were autumn mornings, the very time of year when kings of old went forth to conquest; and I, never stirring from my little corner in Calcutta, would let my mind wander over the whole world. At the very name of another country, my heart would go out to it, and at the sight of a foreigner in the streets, I would fall to weaving a network of dreams,—the mountains, the glens, and the forests of his distant home, with his cottage in its setting, and the free and independent life of far-away wilds. Perhaps the scenes of travel conjure themselves up before me, and pass and repass in my imagination all the more vividly, because I lead such a vegetable existence, that a call to travel would fall upon me like a thunderbolt. In the presence of this Cabuliwallah, I was immediately transported to the foot of arid mountain peaks, with narrow little defiles twisting in and out amongst their towering heights. I could see the string of camels bearing the merchandise, and the company of turbaned merchants, carrying some of their queer old firearms, and some of their spears, journeying downward towards the plains. I could see—but at some such point Mini's mother would intervene, imploring me to "beware of that man."

These were autumn mornings, the perfect time of year when kings of the past went out to conquer; and I, never leaving my little corner in Calcutta, would let my mind wander across the whole world. Just hearing the name of another country would tug at my heart, and when I saw a foreigner in the streets, I would start weaving a web of dreams—the mountains, valleys, and forests of their distant home, with their cottage in its surroundings, and the free and independent life of far-off wilderness. Maybe the travel scenes come to life in my mind more vividly because I lead such a sheltered existence; a call to travel would hit me like a thunderbolt. When I saw this Cabuliwallah, I was instantly transported to the base of dry mountain peaks, with narrow paths winding in and out among their towering heights. I could see a line of camels carrying goods and a group of turbaned merchants, armed with their strange old firearms and spears, making their way down towards the plains. I could see—but at some point like that, Mini's mother would step in, urging me to "watch out for that man."

Mini's mother is unfortunately a very timid lady. Whenever she hears a noise in the street, or sees people coming towards the house, she always jumps to the conclusion that they are either thieves, or drunkards, or snakes, or tigers, or malaria or cockroaches, or caterpillars, or an English sailor. Even after all these years of experience, she is not able to overcome her terror. So she was full of doubts about the Cabuliwallah, and used to beg me to keep a watchful eye on him.

Mini's mom is unfortunately a really timid woman. Whenever she hears a noise outside or sees people approaching the house, she always freaks out and assumes they are either thieves, drunks, snakes, tigers, malaria, cockroaches, caterpillars, or even an English sailor. Despite all her years of experience, she can’t shake her fear. Because of this, she was always suspicious of the Cabuliwallah and would plead with me to keep a close watch on him.

I tried to laugh her fear gently away, but then she would turn round on me seriously, and ask me solemn questions.

I tried to gently laugh away her fear, but then she would turn to me seriously and ask me serious questions.

Were children never kidnapped?

Have children ever been kidnapped?

Was it, then, not true that there was slavery in Cabul?

Was it, then, not true that there was slavery in Kabul?

Was it so very absurd that this big man should be able to carry off a tiny child?

Was it really so ridiculous that this big guy could carry away a little kid?

I urged that, though not impossible, it was highly improbable. But this was not enough, and her dread persisted. As it was indefinite, however, it did not seem right to forbid the man the house, and the intimacy went on unchecked.

I insisted that, while it wasn't impossible, it was very unlikely. But that wasn't enough, and her fear remained. Since it was vague, though, it didn't feel right to ban the man from the house, and their closeness continued without restraint.

Once a year in the middle of January Rahmun, the Cabuliwallah, was in the habit of returning to his country, and as the time approached he would be very busy, going from house to house collecting his debts. This year, however, he could always find time to come and see Mini. It would have seemed to an outsider that there was some conspiracy between the two, for when he could not come in the morning, he would appear in the evening.

Once a year in the middle of January, Rahmun, the Cabuliwallah, typically returned to his homeland. As the date drew near, he would be busy going from house to house collecting his debts. This year, though, he always made time to visit Mini. To an outsider, it might have seemed like there was some secret agreement between them, because if he couldn’t come in the morning, he would show up in the evening.

Even to me it was a little startling now and then, in the corner of a dark room, suddenly to surprise this tall, loose-garmented, much bebagged man; but when Mini would run in smiling, with her, "O! Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" and the two friends, so far apart in age, would subside into their old laughter and their old jokes, I felt reassured.

Even I found it a bit surprising every now and then, in the corner of a dark room, to suddenly come across this tall, loose-dressed, overly baggy man; but when Mini would run in smiling, calling out, "O! Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" and the two friends, so different in age, would settle into their familiar laughter and old jokes, I felt at ease.

One morning, a few days before he had made up his mind to go, I was correcting my proof sheets in my study. It was chilly weather. Through the window the rays of the sun touched my feet, and the slight warmth was very welcome. It was almost eight o'clock, and the early pedestrians were returning home, with their heads covered. All at once, I heard an uproar in the street, and, looking out, saw Rahmun being led away bound between two policemen, and behind them a crowd of curious boys. There were blood-stains on the clothes of the Cabuliwallah, and one of the policemen carried a knife. Hurrying out, I stopped them, and enquired what it all meant. Partly from one, partly from another, I gathered that a certain neighbour had owed the pedlar something for a Rampuri shawl, but had falsely denied having bought it, and that in the course of the quarrel, Rahmun had struck him. Now in the heat of his excitement, the prisoner began calling his enemy all sorts of names, when suddenly in a verandah of my house appeared my little Mini, with her usual exclamation: "O Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" Rahmun's face lighted up as he turned to her. He had no bag under his arm today, so she could not discuss the elephant with him. She at once therefore proceeded to the next question: "Are you going to the father-in-law's house?" Rahmun laughed and said: "Just where I am going, little one!" Then seeing that the reply did not amuse the child, he held up his fettered hands. "Ali," he said, "I would have thrashed that old father-in-law, but my hands are bound!"

One morning, a few days before he decided to leave, I was working on my proof sheets in my study. The weather was chilly. Sunlight streamed through the window, warming my feet and providing welcome relief. It was almost eight o'clock, and the early joggers were heading home, their heads covered up. Suddenly, I heard commotion outside, and looking out, I saw Rahmun being led away, hands tied, between two police officers, with a crowd of curious boys behind them. There were blood stains on the Cabuliwallah's clothes, and one of the officers was carrying a knife. I rushed outside, stopped them, and asked what was going on. From their bits and pieces, I learned that a neighbor had owed the pedlar for a Rampuri shawl but had denied the purchase. During the argument, Rahmun had hit him. In the heat of the moment, the prisoner started calling his opponent all sorts of names when suddenly my little Mini appeared on the verandah, exclaiming: "O Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" Rahmun's face brightened as he looked at her. He didn't have a bag with him today, so she couldn't talk about the elephant. Instead, she quickly moved on to her next question: "Are you going to your father-in-law's house?" Rahmun laughed and said, "That's exactly where I'm headed, little one!" Seeing that his answer didn't amuse her, he raised his bound hands. "Ali," he said, "I would have beaten that old father-in-law, but my hands are tied!"

On a charge of murderous assault, Rahmun was sentenced to some years' imprisonment.

On a charge of attempted murder, Rahmun was sentenced to several years in prison.

Time passed away, and he was not remembered. The accustomed work in the accustomed place was ours, and the thought of the once-free mountaineer spending his years in prison seldom or never occurred to us. Even my light-hearted Mini, I am ashamed to say, forgot her old friend. New companions filled her life. As she grew older, she spent more of her time with girls. So much time indeed did she spend with them that she came no more, as she used to do, to her father's room. I was scarcely on speaking terms with her.

Time went by, and he was forgotten. The usual work in the usual place was ours, and we rarely thought about the once-free mountaineer now spending his years in prison. Even my cheerful Mini, I hate to admit, forgot her old friend. New friends filled her life. As she got older, she spent more time with girls. She spent so much time with them that she stopped coming to her father's room like she used to. I barely spoke to her anymore.

Years had passed away. It was once more autumn and we had made arrangements for our Mini's marriage. It was to take place during the Puja Holidays. With Durga returning to Kailas, the light of our home also was to depart to her husband's house, and leave her father's in the shadow.

Years had gone by. It was autumn again, and we had planned Mini's wedding. It was set to happen during the Puja Holidays. As Durga returned to Kailas, the brightness of our home was also set to leave for her husband's house, casting her father's home into shadow.

The morning was bright. After the rains, there was a sense of ablution in the air, and the sun-rays looked like pure gold. So bright were they that they gave a beautiful radiance even to the sordid brick walls of our Calcutta lanes. Since early dawn to-day the wedding-pipes had been sounding, and at each beat my own heart throbbed. The wail of the tune, Bhairavi, seemed to intensify my pain at the approaching separation. My Mini was to be married to-night.

The morning was bright. After the rain, the air felt refreshed, and the sunbeams looked like pure gold. They were so bright that they shone beautifully on the grimy brick walls of our Calcutta streets. Since early dawn today, the wedding music had been playing, and with each beat, my heart echoed. The sad notes of the tune, Bhairavi, seemed to deepen my pain at the impending separation. My Mini was getting married tonight.

From early morning noise and bustle had pervaded the house. In the courtyard the canopy had to be slung on its bamboo poles; the chandeliers with their tinkling sound must be hung in each room and verandah. There was no end of hurry and excitement. I was sitting in my study, looking through the accounts, when some one entered, saluting respectfully, and stood before me. It was Rahmun the Cabuliwallah. At first I did not recognise him. He had no bag, nor the long hair, nor the same vigour that he used to have. But he smiled, and I knew him again.

From early morning, noise and activity had filled the house. In the courtyard, they had to set up the canopy on its bamboo poles; the chandeliers, making their tinkling sound, needed to be hung in each room and on the verandah. There was no end to the rush and excitement. I was sitting in my study, reviewing the accounts, when someone walked in, greeting me respectfully, and stood in front of me. It was Rahmun the Cabuliwallah. At first, I didn’t recognize him. He had no bag, no long hair, and he didn’t have the same energy he used to. But he smiled, and I recognized him again.

"When did you come, Rahmun?" I asked him.

"When did you arrive, Rahmun?" I asked him.

"Last evening," he said, "I was released from jail."

"Last night," he said, "I got out of jail."

The words struck harsh upon my ears. I had never before talked with one who had wounded his fellow, and my heart shrank within itself, when I realised this, for I felt that the day would have been better-omened had he not turned up.

The words hit my ears hard. I had never spoken to someone who had hurt another person before, and my heart sank when I realized this because I felt that the day would have been luckier if he hadn't shown up.

"There are ceremonies going on," I said, "and I am busy. Could you perhaps come another day?"

"There are ceremonies happening," I said, "and I'm busy. Could you maybe come another day?"

At once he turned to go; but as he reached the door he hesitated, and said: "May I not see the little one, sir, for a moment?" It was his belief that Mini was still the same. He had pictured her running to him as she used, calling "O Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" He had imagined too that they would laugh and talk together, just as of old. In fact, in memory of former days he had brought, carefully wrapped up in paper, a few almonds and raisins and grapes, obtained somehow from a countryman, for his own little fund was dispersed.

He turned to leave but paused at the door and asked, "Can I see the little one for a moment, sir?" He believed that Mini was still the same. He imagined her running to him as she used to, calling, "O Cabuliwallah! Cabuliwallah!" He also pictured them laughing and talking together, just like before. As a reminder of the old days, he had brought a few almonds, raisins, and grapes, carefully wrapped in paper, which he had somehow gotten from a local farmer since his own little stash was gone.

I said again: "There is a ceremony in the house, and you will not be able to see any one to-day."

I repeated, "There’s a ceremony at the house, and you won’t be able to see anyone today."

The man's face fell. He looked wistfully at me for a moment, said "Good morning," and went out. I felt a little sorry, and would have called him back, but I found he was returning of his own accord. He came close up to me holding out his offerings and said: "I brought these few things, sir, for the little one. Will you give them to her?"

The man's expression changed. He looked at me with a hint of longing for a moment, said "Good morning," and walked out. I felt a bit sorry and almost called him back, but then I noticed he was coming back on his own. He stepped closer, holding out his gifts and said, "I brought these for the little one. Will you give them to her?"

I took them and was going to pay him, but he caught my hand and said: "You are very kind, sir! Keep me in your recollection. Do not offer me money!—You have a little girl, I too have one like her in my own home. I think of her, and bring fruits to your child, not to make a profit for myself."

I took them and was about to pay him, but he grabbed my hand and said, "You’re very kind, sir! Keep me in your thoughts. Don’t offer me money! You have a little girl, and I have one just like her at home. I think of her and bring fruits to your child, not to make a profit for myself."

Saying this, he put his hand inside his big loose robe, and brought out a small and dirty piece of paper. With great care he unfolded this, and smoothed it out with both hands on my table. It bore the impression of a little band. Not a photograph. Not a drawing. The impression of an ink-smeared hand laid flat on the paper. This touch of his own little daughter had been always on his heart, as he had come year after year to Calcutta, to sell his wares in the streets.

Saying this, he slipped his hand inside his large, loose robe and pulled out a small, dirty piece of paper. Carefully, he unfolded it and smoothed it out with both hands on my table. It had the impression of a small band. Not a photograph. Not a drawing. Just an ink-smeared handprint pressed flat on the paper. This reminder of his little daughter had always been close to his heart as he returned year after year to Calcutta to sell his goods on the streets.

Tears came to my eyes. I forgot that he was a poor Cabuli fruit-seller, while I was—but no, what was I more than he? He also was a father. That impression of the hand of his little Parbati in her distant mountain home reminded me of my own little Mini.

Tears filled my eyes. I forgot that he was just a poor fruit seller from Kabul, while I was—but wait, what was I really more than him? He was also a father. The thought of his little Parbati's hand back at her home in the mountains made me think of my own little Mini.

I sent for Mini immediately from the inner apartment. Many difficulties were raised, but I would not listen. Clad in the red silk of her wedding-day, with the sandal paste on her forehead, and adorned as a young bride, Mini came, and stood bashfully before me.

I called for Mini right away from the inner room. There were many challenges, but I refused to listen. Dressed in the red silk from her wedding day, with sandalwood paste on her forehead, and looking like a young bride, Mini arrived and stood shyly in front of me.

The Cabuliwallah looked a little staggered at the apparition. He could not revive their old friendship. At last he smiled and said: "Little one, are you going to your father-in-law's house?"

The Cabuliwallah looked a bit surprised at the sight. He couldn't bring back their old friendship. Finally, he smiled and said: "Hey there, are you heading to your father-in-law's place?"

But Mini now understood the meaning of the word "father-in-law," and she could not reply to him as of old. She flushed up at the question, and stood before him with her bride-like face turned down.

But Mini now understood what "father-in-law" meant, and she couldn't respond to him the way she used to. She blushed at the question and stood before him with her bride-like face looking down.

I remembered the day when the Cabuliwallah and my Mini had first met, and I felt sad. When she had gone, Rahmun heaved a deep sigh, and sat down on the floor. The idea had suddenly come to him that his daughter too must have grown in this long time, and that he would have to make friends with her anew. Assuredly he would not find her, as he used to know her. And besides, what might not have happened to her in these eight years?

I remembered the day when the Cabuliwallah and my Mini first met, and I felt sad. After she left, Rahmun let out a deep sigh and sat down on the floor. The thought suddenly hit him that his daughter must have grown up during all this time, and that he would need to get to know her all over again. He definitely wouldn't find her the way he remembered. Plus, who knows what might have happened to her in these eight years?

The marriage-pipes sounded, and the mild autumn sun streamed round us. But Rahmun sat in the little Calcutta lane, and saw before him the barren mountains of Afghanistan.

The wedding music played, and the soft autumn sun shone around us. But Rahmun sat in the small Calcutta street, staring at the empty mountains of Afghanistan in front of him.

I took out a bank-note, and gave it to him, saying: "Go back to your own daughter, Rahmun, in your own country, and may the happiness of your meeting bring good fortune to my child!"

I pulled out a banknote and handed it to him, saying, "Go back to your own daughter, Rahmun, in your own country, and may the joy of your reunion bring good luck to my child!"

Having made this present, I had to curtail some of the festivities. I could not have the electric lights I had intended, nor the military band, and the ladies of the house were despondent at it. But to me the wedding feast was all the brighter for the thought that in a distant land a long-lost father met again with his only child.

Having made this gift, I had to cut back on some of the celebrations. I couldn't have the electric lights I had planned or the military band, and the women in the house were really down about it. But to me, the wedding feast felt even more special knowing that in a faraway place, a long-lost father was reunited with his only child.










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