This is a modern-English version of Mugby Junction, originally written by Dickens, Charles. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

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christmas stories
from “household
words” and “all
the year round”
edited by
charles dickens

Christmas
stories
from “Home
Words and All
the Whole Year
edited by
Charles Dickens

Mugby Junction

p. viRichard Clay & Sons, Limited,
London & Bungay.

p. viRichard Clay & Sons, Limited,
London & Bungay.

p. viimugby junction: by
charles dickens, andrew
halliday, charles collins,
hesba stretton, and amelia
b. edwards: being the extra
christmas number ofall
the year round,” 1866.  with
a frontispiece by a. jules
goodmanlondon: chapman
and hall, ltd.  1898.

p. viiMugby Junction: by
Charles Dickens, Andrew
Halliday, charles collins,
Hesba Stretton, and Amelia
b. edwards: being the bonus
holiday issue ofall
year-round,” 1866.  with
a front cover by A. Jules
good manLondon: chapman
and auditorium, Ltd.  1898.

p. ixINDEX TO
MUGBY JUNCTION

INDEX TO MUGBY JUNCTION

 

 

page

page

Barbox Brothers.

Barbox Brothers.

By Charles Dickens

By Charles Dickens

Barbox Brothers & Co.

Barbox Brothers & Co.

By Charles Dickens

By Charles Dickens

Main Line: The Boy at Mugby.

Main Line: The Boy at Mugby.

By Charles Dickens

By Charles Dickens

No. 1 Branch Line: The Signalman.

No. 1 Branch Line: The Signalman.

By Charles Dickens

By Charles Dickens

No. 2 Branch Line: The Engine Driver.

No. 2 Branch Line: The Engineer.

By Andrew Halliday

By Andrew Halliday

No. 3 Branch Line: The Compensation House.

No. 3 Branch Line: The Compensation House.

By Charles Collins

By Charles Collins

No. 4 Branch Line: The Travelling Post-Office.

No. 4 Branch Line: The Traveling Post Office.

By Hesba Stretton

By Hesba Stretton

No. 5 Branch Line: The Engineer.

No. 5 Branch Line: The Engineer.

By Amelia B. Edwards

By Amelia B. Edwards

p. 1BARBOX BROTHERS

I

“Guard!  What place is this?”

“Guard! What is this place?”

“Mugby Junction, sir.”

“Mugby Junction, sir.”

“A windy place!”

“It's so windy here!”

“Yes, it mostly is, sir.”

"Yes, it mostly is, sir."

“And looks comfortless indeed!”

“And looks pretty bleak indeed!”

“Yes, it generally does, sir.”

“Yes, it usually does, sir.”

“Is it a rainy night still?”

“Is it still a rainy night?”

“Pours, sir.”

"Pouring, sir."

“Open the door.  I’ll get out.”

“Open the door. I’ll get out.”

“You’ll have, sir,” said the guard, glistening with drops of wet, and looking at the tearful face of his watch by the light of his lantern as the traveller descended, “three minutes here.”

“You’ll have, sir,” said the guard, glistening with drops of water and looking at the teary face of his watch by the light of his lantern as the traveler arrived, “three minutes here.”

“More, I think.—For I am not going on.”

“More, I think.—Because I’m not continuing.”

“Thought you had a through ticket, sir?”

“Didn’t you think you had a direct ticket, sir?”

p. 2“So I have, but I shall sacrifice the rest of it.  I want my luggage.”

p. 2“I have, but I’m willing to give up the rest. I need my bags.”

“Please to come to the van and point it out, sir.  Be good enough to look very sharp, sir.  Not a moment to spare.”

“Please come to the van and point it out, sir. Kindly look very closely, sir. Not a moment to waste.”

The guard hurried to the luggage van, and the traveller hurried after him.  The guard got into it, and the traveller looked into it.

The guard rushed to the luggage van, and the traveler quickly followed him. The guard climbed inside, and the traveler peeked in.

“Those two large black portmanteaus in the corner where your light shines.  Those are mine.”

“Those two big black suitcases in the corner where your light shines. Those are mine.”

“Name upon ’em, sir?”

"What's their name, sir?"

“Barbox Brothers.”

“Barbox Bros.”

“Stand clear, sir, if you please.  One.  Two.  Right!”

“Please stand clear, sir. One. Two. Right!”

Lamp waved.  Signal lights ahead already changing.  Shriek from engine.  Train gone.

Lamp waved. Signal lights ahead were already changing. Shriek from the engine. Train is gone.

“Mugby Junction!” said the traveller, pulling up the woollen muffler round his throat with both hands.  “At past three o’clock of a tempestuous morning!  So!”

“Mugby Junction!” said the traveler, pulling the wool scarf tight around his neck with both hands. “At just past three o’clock on a stormy morning! So!”

He spoke to himself.  There was no one else to speak to.  Perhaps, though there had been any one else to speak to, he would have preferred to speak to himself.  Speaking to himself, he spoke to a man within five years of fifty either way, who had turned grey too soon, like a neglected fire; a man of pondering habit, brooding carriage of the head, and suppressed internal voice; a man with many indications on him of having been much alone.

He talked to himself. There was no one else around to talk to. Maybe even if there had been someone else, he would have chosen to talk to himself instead. While speaking to himself, he imagined a man approaching fifty, who had gone gray too quickly, like a fire that hadn't been tended to; a man who frequently pondered, carried his head in a brooding manner, and had a quiet inner voice; a man who showed many signs of having spent a lot of time alone.

p. 3He stood unnoticed on the dreary platform, except by the rain and by the wind.  Those two vigilant assailants made a rush at him.  “Very well,” said he, yielding.  “It signifies nothing to me, to what quarter I turn my face.”

p. 3He stood on the gloomy platform, unnoticed except by the rain and the wind. Those two persistent forces came at him fiercely. “Alright,” he said, giving in. “It doesn’t matter to me which way I turn my face.”

Thus, at Mugby Junction, at past three o’clock of a tempestuous morning, the traveller went where the weather drove him.

Thus, at Mugby Junction, at a little past three o’clock on a stormy morning, the traveler went where the weather took him.

Not but what he could make a stand when he was so minded, for, coming to the end of the roofed shelter (it is of considerable extent at Mugby Junction) and looking out upon the dark night, with a yet darker spirit-wing of storm beating its wild way through it, he faced about, and held his own as ruggedly in the difficult direction, as he had held it in the easier one.  Thus, with a steady step, the traveller went up and down, up and down, up and down, seeking nothing, and finding it.

Not that he couldn't stand his ground when he wanted to, because as he reached the edge of the covered shelter (which is quite large at Mugby Junction) and looked out into the dark night, with an even darker storm raging through it, he turned around and held his own just as firmly against the challenging direction as he had in the easier one. So, with a steady pace, the traveler walked back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, looking for nothing and finding it.

A place replete with shadowy shapes, this Mugby Junction in the black hours of the four-and-twenty.  Mysterious goods trains, covered with palls and gliding on like vast weird funerals, conveying themselves guiltily away from the presence of the few lighted lamps, as if their freight had come to a secret and unlawful end.  Half miles of coal pursuing in a Detective manner, following when they lead, stopping when they stop, backing when they back.  Red hot embers showering out p. 4upon the ground, down this dark avenue, and down the other, as if torturing fires were being raked clear; concurrently, shrieks and groans and grinds invading the ear, as if the tortured were at the height of their suffering.  Iron-barred cages full of cattle jangling by midway, the drooping beasts with horns entangled, eyes frozen with terror, and mouths too: at least they have long icicles (or what seem so) hanging from their lips.  Unknown languages in the air, conspiring in red, green, and white characters.  An earthquake accompanied with thunder and lightning, going up express to London.

A place filled with shadowy figures, this Mugby Junction in the dark hours of the night. Mysterious freight trains, covered like odd funerals, gliding away from the few lit lamps, as if their cargo had reached a secret and illegal end. Long lines of coal moving in a detective-like fashion, following when they lead, stopping when they stop, reversing when they back up. Hot embers falling to the ground down this dark street and the next, as if fiery torture was being cleared; at the same time, shrieks, groans, and grinding sounds filling the air, as if the tortured were at the peak of their agony. Iron-barred cages full of cattle jangling by, the drooping animals with tangled horns, their eyes frozen in fear, and their mouths too: at least they have long icicles (or what look like them) hanging from their lips. Strange languages in the air, conspiring in red, green, and white letters. An earthquake accompanied by thunder and lightning, rushing express to London.

Now, all quiet, all rusty, wind and rain in possession, lamps extinguished, Mugby Junction dead and indistinct, with its robe drawn over its head, like Cæsar.  Now, too, as the belated traveller plodded up and down, a shadowy train went by him in the gloom which was no other than the train of a life.  From whatsoever intangible deep cutting or dark tunnel it emerged, here it came, unsummoned and unannounced, stealing upon him and passing away into obscurity.  Here, mournfully went by, a child who had never had a childhood or known a parent, inseparable from a youth with a bitter sense of his namelessness, coupled to a man the enforced business of whose best years had been distasteful and oppressive, linked to an ungrateful friend, dragging after him a woman once p. 5beloved.  Attendant, with many a clank and wrench, were lumbering cares, dark meditations, huge dim disappointments, monotonous years, a long jarring line of the discords of a solitary and unhappy existence.

Now, everything is quiet and rusty, with the wind and rain taking over, lamps turned off, Mugby Junction silent and unclear, as if draped in a cloak like Caesar. Now, as the late traveler trudged back and forth, a shadowy train passed him in the darkness that was nothing more than the train of life. From some intangible deep cut or dark tunnel it came, unsummoned and unannounced, sneaking up on him and fading into nothingness. Here, sadly passed by, a child who had never experienced childhood or known a parent, tied to a youth burdened by his lack of identity, connected to a man whose years were marked by unpleasant and oppressive duties, linked to an ungrateful friend, dragging behind him a woman who was once beloved. With a lot of clanking and wrenching sounds came heavy cares, dark thoughts, massive disappointments, years of monotony, a long unpleasant string of the disharmonies of a lonely and unhappy life.

“—Yours, sir?”

"—Yours, sir?"

The traveller recalled his eyes from the waste into which they had been staring, and fell back a step or so under the abruptness, and perhaps the chance appropriateness, of the question.

The traveler pulled his eyes away from the emptiness they had been fixed on and took a step back in surprise at the suddenness, and maybe the unexpected relevance, of the question.

“O!  My thoughts were not here for the moment.  Yes.  Yes.  Those two portmanteaus are mine.  Are you a Porter?”

“O! My mind wasn’t focused just now. Yes. Yes. Those two suitcases are mine. Are you a porter?”

“On Porter’s wages, sir.  But I am Lamps.”

“Regarding Porter's wages, sir. But I'm Lamps.”

The traveller looked a little confused.

The traveler looked a bit confused.

“Who did you say you are?”

“Who did you say you are?”

“Lamps, sir,” showing an oily cloth in his hand, as further explanation.

“Lamps, sir,” he said, holding up a greasy cloth in his hand for more clarity.

“Surely, surely.  Is there any hotel or tavern here?”

“Surely, surely. Is there a hotel or tavern around here?”

“Not exactly here, sir.  There is a Refreshment Room here, but—”  Lamps, with a mighty serious look, gave his head a warning roll that plainly added—“but it’s a blessed circumstance for you that it’s not open.”

“Not exactly here, sir. There is a Refreshment Room here, but—” Lamps, with a very serious look, gave his head a warning roll that clearly added—“but it’s a fortunate thing for you that it’s not open.”

“You couldn’t recommend it, I see, if it was available?”

“You couldn’t recommend it, I see, if it was available?”

“Ask your pardon, sir.  If it was—?”

“Excuse me, sir. If it was—?”

“Open?”

"Are you open?"

“It ain’t my place, as a paid servant of the p. 6company to give my opinion on any of the company’s toepics,” he pronounced it more like toothpicks, “beyond lamp-ile and cottons,” returned Lamps, in a confidential tone; “but speaking as a man, I wouldn’t recommend my father (if he was to come to life again) to go and try how he’d be treated at the Refreshment Room.  Not speaking as a man, no, I would not.”

“It’s not my place, as a paid employee of the p. 6company to share my thoughts on any of the company’s topics,” he pronounced it more like toothpicks, “except for lamp-ile and cottons,” returned Lamps, in a confidential tone; “but if I were speaking as a man, I wouldn’t recommend my father (if he came back to life) to go and see how he’d be treated at the Refreshment Room. Not speaking as a man, no, I would not.”

The traveller nodded conviction.  “I suppose I can put up in the town?  There is a town here?”  For the traveller (though a stay-at-home compared with most travellers) had been, like many others, carried on the steam winds and the iron tides through that Junction before, without having ever, as one might say, gone ashore there.

The traveler nodded confidently. “I guess I can stay in the town? Is there a town here?” For the traveler (though more of a homebody compared to most travelers) had, like many others, been swept along by the steam winds and iron tides through that Junction before, without ever, so to speak, actually going ashore there.

“O yes, there’s a town, sir.  Anyways there’s town enough to put up in.  But,” following the glance of the other at his luggage, “this is a very dead time of the night with us, sir.  The deadest time.  I might a’most call it our deadest and buriedest time.”

“O yes, there’s a town, sir. Anyway, there’s enough of a town to stay in. But,” he said, looking at the other man’s luggage, “this is the quietest time of night for us, sir. The absolute quietest. I could almost say it’s our darkest and most buried time.”

“No porters about?”

“No porters around?”

“Well, sir, you see,” returned Lamps, confidential again, “they in general goes off with the gas.  That’s how it is.  And they seem to have overlooked you, through your walking to the furder end of the platform.  But in about twelve minutes or so, she may be up.”

“Well, sir, you see,” Lamps replied, now speaking in a low voice, “usually they leave with the gas. That’s just how it is. And it looks like they missed you because you walked to the far end of the platform. But in about twelve minutes or so, she should be here.”

“Who may be up?”

"Who might be awake?"

p. 7“The three forty-two, sir.  She goes off in a sidin’ till the Up X passes, and then she,” here an air of hopeful vagueness pervaded Lamps, “doos all as lays in her power.”

p. 7“The 3:42, sir. It leaves when the Up X goes by, and then she,” here a sense of hopeful uncertainty filled Lamps, “does everything she can.”

“I doubt if I comprehend the arrangement.”

“I’m not sure I understand the setup.”

“I doubt if anybody do, sir.  She’s a Parliamentary, sir.  And, you see, a Parliamentary, or a Skirmishun—”

“I don’t think anyone does, sir. She’s a Parliamentary, sir. And, you see, a Parliamentary, or a Skirmishun—”

“Do you mean an Excursion?”

“Are you talking about a trip?”

“That’s it, sir.—A Parliamentary, or a Skirmishun, she mostly doos go off into a sidin’.  But when she can get a chance, she’s whistled out of it, and she’s whistled up into doin’ all as,” Lamps again wore the air of a highly sanguine man who hoped for the best, “all as lays in her power.”

“That’s it, sir.—A Parliamentary, or a Skirmishun, she mostly does go off into a side. But when she can get a chance, she’s whistled out of it, and she’s whistled up into doing all that,” Lamps again wore the air of a highly optimistic man who hoped for the best, “all that lies within her power.”

He then explained that porters on duty being required to be in attendance on the Parliamentary matron in question, would doubtless turn up with the gas.  In the meantime, if the gentleman would not very much object to the smell of lamp-oil, and would accept the warmth of his little room.—The gentleman being by this time very cold, instantly closed with the proposal.

He then explained that the porters on duty, who needed to be present with the Parliamentary matron in question, would likely bring the gas. In the meantime, if the gentleman didn’t mind the smell of lamp oil and was okay with the warmth of his small room… The gentleman, feeling quite cold by this point, quickly agreed to the offer.

A greasy little cabin it was, suggestive to the sense of smell, of a cabin in a Whaler.  But there was a bright fire burning in its rusty grate, and on the floor there stood a wooden stand of newly trimmed and lighted lamps, ready for carriage service.  They made a bright p. 8show, and their light, and the warmth, accounted for the popularity of the room, as borne witness to by many impressions of velveteen trousers on a form by the fire, and many rounded smears and smudges of stooping velveteen shoulders on the adjacent wall.  Various untidy shelves accommodated a quantity of lamps and oil-cans, and also a fragrant collection of what looked like the pocket-handkerchiefs of the whole lamp family.

It was a greasy little cabin, reminiscent of a cabin on a whaling ship. But there was a bright fire burning in the rusty grate, and on the floor stood a wooden stand with newly trimmed and lit lamps, ready for service. They created a bright show, and their light and warmth explained why the room was so popular, evidenced by many impressions of velveteen trousers on a seat by the fire, and many rounded smudges of stooping velveteen shoulders on the nearby wall. Various messy shelves held a number of lamps and oil cans, as well as a fragrant collection that looked like the pocket handkerchiefs of the entire lamp family.

As Barbox Brothers (so to call the traveller on the warranty of his luggage) took his seat upon the form, and warmed his now ungloved hands at the fire, he glanced aside at a little deal desk, much blotched with ink, which his elbow touched.  Upon it, were some scraps of coarse paper, and a superannuated steel pen in very reduced and gritty circumstances.

As Barbox Brothers (as we’ll refer to the traveler based on his luggage claim) took a seat on the bench and warmed his bare hands by the fire, he glanced over at a small wooden desk, heavily stained with ink, that his elbow brushed against. On it were some scraps of rough paper and an old steel pen in very worn and dirty condition.

From glancing at the scraps of paper, he turned involuntarily to his host, and said, with some roughness—

From looking at the scraps of paper, he turned instinctively to his host and said, a bit harshly—

“Why, you are never a poet, man!”

“Why, you’re never going to be a poet, man!”

Lamps had certainly not the conventional appearance of one, as he stood modestly rubbing his squab nose with a handkerchief so exceedingly oily, that he might have been in the act of mistaking himself for one of his charges.  He was a spare man of about the Barbox Brothers’ time of life, with his features whimsically drawn upward as if they were attracted by the roots of his hair.  He had a p. 9peculiarly shining transparent complexion, probably occasioned by constant oleaginous application; and his attractive hair, being cut short, and being grizzled, and standing straight up on end as if it in its turn were attracted by some invisible magnet above it, the top of his head was not very unlike a lamp-wick.

Lamps definitely didn’t look like a typical lamp as he stood there, modestly rubbing his chubby nose with a handkerchief that was so oily, he might have thought he was one of his own charges. He was a thin man about the same age as the Barbox Brothers, with features that seemed whimsically drawn upward as if his hair roots were pulling them. He had a surprisingly shiny, translucent complexion, probably from constant oily treatments; his attractive hair was cut short, going gray, and standing straight up as if pulled by some invisible magnet above, making the top of his head look a lot like a lamp wick.

“But to be sure it’s no business of mine,” said Barbox Brothers.  “That was an impertinent observation on my part.  Be what you like.”

“But to be honest, it’s not my place,” said Barbox Brothers. “That was an rude thing for me to say. Be whoever you want.”

“Some people, sir,” remarked Lamps, in a tone of apology, “are sometimes what they don’t like.”

“Some people, sir,” said Lamps apologetically, “sometimes act like what they don’t like.”

“Nobody knows that better than I do,” sighed the other.  “I have been what I don’t like, all my life.”

“Nobody knows that better than I do,” sighed the other. “I have been what I don’t like, all my life.”

“When I first took, sir,” resumed Lamps, “to composing little Comic-Songs-like—”

“When I first started, sir,” continued Lamps, “to write little comic songs like—”

Barbox Brothers eyed him with great disfavour.

Barbox Brothers looked at him with a lot of dislike.

“—To composing little Comic-Songs-like—and what was more hard—to singing ’em afterwards,” said Lamps, “it went against the grain at that time, it did indeed.”

“—To writing tiny comic songs—and what was even tougher—to singing them afterward,” said Lamps, “it really was a struggle back then, it truly was.”

Something that was not all oil here shining in Lamps’s eye, Barbox Brothers withdrew his own a little disconcerted, looked at the fire, and put a foot on the top bar.  “Why did you do it, then?” he asked, after a short pause; abruptly enough but in a softer tone.  “If p. 10you didn’t want to do it, why did you do it?  Where did you sing them?  Public-house?”

Something wasn't quite right in Lamps’s eye; Barbox Brothers stepped back a bit, feeling uneasy, stared at the fire, and rested a foot on the top bar. “Why did you do it, then?” he asked after a brief pause, quite abruptly but in a gentler tone. “If you didn’t want to do it, why did you do it? Where did you sing them? In a pub?”

To which Mr. Lamps returned the curious reply: “Bedside.”

To which Mr. Lamps responded with a curious reply: “Bedside.”

At this moment, while the traveller looked at him for elucidation, Mugby Junction started suddenly, trembled violently, and opened its gas eyes.  “She’s got up!” Lamps announced, excited.  “What lays in her power is sometimes more, and sometimes less; but it’s laid in her power to get up to-night, by George!”

At that moment, while the traveler looked at him for an explanation, Mugby Junction suddenly started, shook violently, and lit up. “She’s up!” Lamps exclaimed, thrilled. “What she can do is sometimes more, and sometimes less; but tonight, by George, she has the power to get up!”

The legend “Barbox Brothers” in large white letters on two black surfaces, was very soon afterwards trundling on a truck through a silent street, and, when the owner of the legend had shivered on the pavement half an hour, what time the porter’s knocks at the Inn Door knocked up the whole town first, and the Inn last, he groped his way into the close air of a shut-up house, and so groped between the sheets of a shut-up bed that seemed to have been expressly refrigerated for him when last made.

The sign “Barbox Brothers” in big white letters on two black panels was soon rolling down a quiet street on a truck. After the owner of the sign had stood shivering on the sidewalk for half an hour, during which the porter’s knocks at the Inn Door woke up the whole town, and finally the Inn, he made his way into the still air of a locked-up house. He then stumbled between the sheets of a made bed that felt like it had been specially cooled for him the last time it was made.

II

“You remember me, Young Jackson?”

“Do you remember me, Young Jackson?”

“What do I remember if not you?  You are my first remembrance.  It was you who told me that was my name.  It was you who told me that on every twentieth of December p. 11my life had a penitential anniversary in it called a birthday.  I suppose the last communication was truer than the first!”

“What do I remember if not you? You are my first memory. It was you who told me that was my name. It was you who told me that on every twentieth of December p. 11 my life had a penitential anniversary in it called a birthday. I guess the last message was more accurate than the first!”

“What am I like, Young Jackson?”

“What am I like, Young Jackson?”

“You are like a blight all through the year, to me.  You hard-lined, thin-lipped, repressive, changeless woman with a wax mask on.  You are like the Devil to me; most of all when you teach me religious things, for you make me abhor them.”

“You are like a curse all year round to me. You rigid, thin-lipped, controlling, unchanging woman with a wax mask on. You feel like the Devil to me; especially when you teach me about religion, because you make me hate it.”

“You remember me, Mr. Young Jackson?”  In another voice from another quarter.

“You remember me, Mr. Young Jackson?” In another voice from a different direction.

“Most gratefully, sir.  You were the ray of hope and prospering ambition in my life.  When I attended your course, I believed that I should come to be a great healer, and I felt almost happy—even though I was still the one boarder in the house with that horrible mask, and ate and drank in silence and constraint with the mask before me, every day.  As I had done every, every, every day, through my school-time and from my earliest recollection.”

“Most gratefully, sir. You were the ray of hope and ambition in my life. When I took your course, I believed I would become a great healer, and I felt almost happy—even though I was still the only boarder in the house with that horrible mask, eating and drinking in silence and discomfort with the mask in front of me, day after day. Just like I had done every single day through my school years and for as long as I can remember.”

“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”

“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”

“You are like a Superior Being to me.  You are like Nature beginning to reveal herself to me.  I hear you again, as one of the hushed crowd of young men kindling under the power of your presence and knowledge, and you bring into my eyes the only exultant tears that ever stood in them.”

“You seem like a higher being to me. You’re like Nature starting to show herself to me. I hear you again, as one of the quiet group of young men igniting with the strength of your presence and knowledge, and you bring into my eyes the only joyful tears that have ever been there.”

p. 12“You remember Me, Mr. Young Jackson?”  In a grating voice from quite another quarter.

p. 12“Do you remember me, Mr. Young Jackson?” It came from a harsh voice coming from a different direction.

“Too well.  You made your ghostly appearance in my life one day, and announced that its course was to be suddenly and wholly changed.  You showed me which was my wearisome seat in the Galley of Barbox Brothers.  (When they were, if they ever were, is unknown to me; there was nothing of them but the name when I bent to the oar.)  You told me what I was to do, and what to be paid; you told me afterwards, at intervals of years, when I was to sign for the Firm, when I became a partner, when I became the Firm.  I know no more of it, or of myself.”

“Too well. You made your ghostly appearance in my life one day and announced that everything was about to change dramatically. You pointed out my boring spot in the Galley of Barbox Brothers. (When they existed, if they ever did, is a mystery to me; there was nothing of them but the name when I started rowing.) You told me what I was supposed to do and how much I would get paid; you later informed me, at intervals over the years, when I was to sign for the Firm, when I became a partner, and when I became the Firm. I know no more about it, or about myself.”

“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”

“What am I like, Mr. Young Jackson?”

“You are like my father, I sometimes think.  You are hard enough and cold enough so to have brought up an unacknowledged son.  I see your scanty figure, your close brown suit, and your tight brown wig; but you, too, wear a wax mask to your death.  You never by a chance remove it—it never by a chance falls off—and I know no more of you.”

“You remind me of my father, I sometimes think. You're tough and distant enough to have raised a hidden son. I see your thin frame, your fitted brown suit, and your tight brown wig; but you, too, wear a mask of indifference until the end. You never accidentally take it off—it never accidentally comes off—and I know nothing more about you.”

Throughout this dialogue, the traveller spoke to himself at his window in the morning, as he had spoken to himself at the Junction over-night.  And as he had then looked in the darkness, a man who had turned grey too soon, like a neglected fire: so he p. 13now looked in the sunlight, an ashier grey, like a fire which the brightness of the sun put out.

Throughout this conversation, the traveler chatted to himself at his window in the morning, just like he had at the Junction the night before. And as he had then looked into the darkness, a man who had turned grey too soon, like a neglected fire; now he p. 13looked into the sunlight, a duller grey, like a fire that the brightness of the sun extinguished.

The firm of Barbox Brothers had been some offshoot or irregular branch of the Public Notary and bill-broking tree.  It had gained for itself a griping reputation before the days of Young Jackson, and the reputation had stuck to it and to him.  As he had imperceptibly come into possession of the dim den up in the corner of a court off Lombard-street, on whose grimy windows the inscription Barbox Brothers had for many long years daily interposed itself between him and the sky, so he had insensibly found himself a personage held in chronic distrust, whom it was essential to screw tight to every transaction in which he engaged, whose word was never to be taken without his attested bond, whom all dealers with openly set up guards and wards against.  This character had come upon him through no act of his own.  It was as if the original Barbox had stretched himself down upon the office-floor, and had thither caused to be conveyed Young Jackson in his sleep, and had there effected a metempsychosis and exchange of persons with him.  The discovery—aided in its turn by the deceit of the only woman he had ever loved, and the deceit of the only friend he had ever made: who eloped from him to be married together—the discovery, so p. 14followed up, completed what his earliest rearing had begun.  He shrank, abashed, within the form of Barbox, and lifted up his head and heart no more.

The Barbox Brothers firm was some offshoot or odd branch of the Public Notary and bill-broking world. It had built a bad reputation before Young Jackson's time, and that reputation stuck to him as well. As he gradually took over the dim office in the corner of a court off Lombard Street, where the grimy windows displayed the name Barbox Brothers for many years, he also found himself becoming a person everyone viewed with suspicion. People insisted on double-checking every deal he was involved in, and no one would take his word without a formal bond. All the businesspeople he dealt with set up defenses against him. This reputation wasn't his fault. It felt like the original Barbox had laid down on the office floor, somehow causing Young Jackson to end up there in his sleep, which resulted in a strange swap of identities. The revelation—made worse by the betrayal of the only woman he ever loved and the only friend he ever had, who ran off together to get married—only added to the issues rooted in his upbringing. He felt ashamed, trapped in the identity of Barbox, and no longer lifted his head or heart.

But he did at last effect one great release in his condition.  He broke the oar he had plied so long, and he scuttled and sank the galley.  He prevented the gradual retirement of an old conventional business from him, by taking the initiative and retiring from it.  With enough to live on (though after all with not too much), he obliterated the firm of Barbox Brothers from the pages of the Post-office Directory and the face of the earth, leaving nothing of it but its name on two portmanteaus.

But he finally made a significant change in his situation. He broke the oar he had been using for so long, and he scuttled and sank the boat. He stopped the slow decline of an old-fashioned business by choosing to leave it behind. With just enough to get by (though not a lot), he erased Barbox Brothers from the Post-office Directory and the world, leaving only its name on two suitcases.

“For one must have some name in going about, for people to pick up,” he explained to Mugby High-street, through the Inn-window, “and that name at least was real once.  Whereas, Young Jackson!—Not to mention its being a sadly satirical misnomer for Old Jackson.”

“For one needs a name to get around, so people can recognize you,” he explained to Mugby High-street, through the Inn-window, “and that name was genuine at one point. Whereas, Young Jackson!—Not to mention that it’s a rather ironic misnomer for Old Jackson.”

He took up his hat and walked out, just in time to see, passing along on the opposite side of the way, a velveteen man, carrying his day’s dinner in a small bundle that might have been larger without suspicion of gluttony, and pelting away towards the Junction at a great pace.

He grabbed his hat and stepped outside, just in time to see a man in velveteen on the other side of the street, carrying his lunch in a small bundle that might have been bigger without it looking like he was overindulging, and rushing towards the Junction at a fast pace.

“There’s Lamps!” said Barbox Brother.  “And by-the-by—”

“There are lamps!” said Barbox Brother. “And by the way—”

p. 15Ridiculous, surely, that a man so serious, so self-contained, and not yet three days emancipated from a routine of drudgery, should stand rubbing his chin in the street, in a brown study about Comic Songs.

p. 15It's absurd, really, that a man who is so serious, so composed, and who has just been free for less than three days from a monotonous routine, would be seen standing in the street, lost in thought about funny songs.

“Bedside?” said Barbox Brothers, testily.  “Sings them at the bedside?  Why at the bedside, unless he goes to bed drunk?  Does, I shouldn’t wonder.  But it’s no business of mine.  Let me see.  Mugby Junction, Mugby Junction.  Where shall I go next?  As it came into my head last night when I woke from an uneasy sleep in the carriage and found myself here, I can go anywhere from here.  Where shall I go?  I’ll go and look at the Junction by daylight.  There’s no hurry, and I may like the look of one Line better than another.”

“Bedside?” Barbox Brothers said, annoyed. “Sings them at the bedside? Why at the bedside, unless he goes to bed drunk? Does, I wouldn’t be surprised. But that’s not my concern. Let me see. Mugby Junction, Mugby Junction. Where should I go next? As it popped into my head last night when I woke from a restless sleep in the carriage and found myself here, I can go anywhere from here. Where should I go? I’ll go check out the Junction in the daylight. There’s no rush, and I might prefer one Line over another.”

But there were so many Lines.  Gazing down upon them from a bridge at the Junction, it was as if the concentrating Companies formed a great Industrial Exhibition of the works of extraordinary ground-spiders that spun iron.  And then so many of the Lines went such wonderful ways, so crossing and curving among one another, that the eye lost them.  And then some of them appeared to start with the fixed intention of going five hundred miles, and all of a sudden gave it up at an insignificant barrier, or turned off into a p. 16workshop.  And then others, like intoxicated men, went a little way very straight, and surprisingly slued round and came back again.  And then others were so chock-full of trucks of coal, others were so blocked with trucks of casks, others were so gorged with trucks of ballast, others were so set apart for wheeled objects like immense iron cotton-reels: while others were so bright and clear, and others were so delivered over to rust and ashes and idle wheelbarrows out of work, with their legs in the air (looking much like their masters on strike), that there was no beginning, middle, or end, to the bewilderment.

But there were so many tracks. Looking down at them from a bridge at the junction, it was as if the busy companies created a huge industrial showcase of remarkable ground-spiders spinning iron. And then so many of the tracks went in such amazing directions, crossing and curving into each other, that it became hard to follow them. Some seemed to set out with the clear plan of traveling five hundred miles but suddenly got stopped by a minor barrier or veered off into a workshop. Others, like tipsy people, went straight for a bit but then unexpectedly turned around and came back. There were those packed full of coal trucks, others clogged with casks, some stuffed with ballast trucks, while others were designated for wheeled items like giant iron cotton reels. Meanwhile, some tracks were bright and clear, and others were surrendered to rust and ashes, filled with idle wheelbarrows on their backs (much like their owners on strike), creating a complete sense of confusion with no clear beginning, middle, or end.

Barbox Brothers stood puzzled on the bridge, passing his right hand across the lines on his forehead, which multiplied while he looked down, as if the railway Lines were getting themselves photographed on that sensitive plate.  Then, was heard a distant ringing of bells and blowing of whistles.  Then, puppet-looking heads of men popped out of boxes in perspective, and popped in again.  Then, prodigious wooden razors set up on end, began shaving the atmosphere.  Then, several locomotive engines in several directions began to scream and be agitated.  Then, along one avenue a train came in.  Then, along another two trains appeared that didn’t come in, but stopped without.  Then, bits of trains broke p. 17off.  Then, a struggling horse became involved with them.  Then, the locomotives shared the bits of trains, and ran away with the whole.

Barbox Brothers stood confused on the bridge, running his right hand across the lines on his forehead, which seemed to multiply as he looked down, as if the railway lines were being captured on that sensitive plate. Then, distant bells rang and whistles blew. Next, puppet-like heads of men popped out of boxes in perspective and popped back in again. Then, enormous wooden razors stood up, starting to shave the air. After that, several locomotives in different directions began to scream and show agitation. Then, along one path, a train arrived. Then, along another, two trains appeared that didn’t come in but stopped outside. Then, pieces of trains broke off. Then, a struggling horse got tangled up with them. Finally, the locomotives took the bits of trains and ran off with everything.

“I have not made my next move much clearer by this.  No hurry.  No need to make up my mind to-day, or to-morrow, nor yet the day after.  I’ll take a walk.”

“I haven’t made my next move any clearer with this. No rush. No need to decide today, tomorrow, or even the day after. I’ll go for a walk.”

It fell out somehow (perhaps he meant it should) that the walk tended to the platform at which he had alighted, and to Lamps’s room.  But Lamps was not in his room.  A pair of velveteen shoulders were adapting themselves to one of the impressions on the wall by Lamps’s fireplace, but otherwise the room was void.  In passing back to get out of the station again, he learnt the cause of this vacancy, by catching sight of Lamps on the opposite line of railway, skipping along the top of a train, from carriage to carriage, and catching lighted namesakes thrown up to him by a coadjutor.

It somehow happened (maybe he intended it to) that the walk led to the platform where he had gotten off, and to Lamps’s room. But Lamps wasn’t in his room. A pair of velveteen shoulders were fitting into one of the marks on the wall by Lamps’s fireplace, but otherwise the room was empty. As he turned to leave the station again, he discovered the reason for this emptiness by catching sight of Lamps on the opposite train line, hopping along the top of a train, from carriage to carriage, and catching lit namesakes tossed up to him by a helper.

“He is busy.  He has not much time for composing or singing Comic Songs this morning, I take it.”

“He's busy. He doesn't have much time for writing or singing Comic Songs this morning, I guess.”

The direction he pursued now, was into the country, keeping very near to the side of one great Line of railway, and within easy view of others.  “I have half a mind,” he said, glancing around, “to settle the question from this point, by saying, ‘I’ll take this set p. 18of rails, or that, or t’other, and stick to it.’  They separate themselves from the confusion, out here, and go their ways.”

The path he took now led into the countryside, keeping close to one major railway line and within sight of others. “I’m thinking,” he said, looking around, “to settle this right here by saying, ‘I’ll choose this set of rails, or that one, or the other, and just stick with it.’ They set themselves apart from the chaos out here and go their own routes.”

Ascending a gentle hill of some extent, he came to a few cottages.  There, looking about him as a very reserved man might who had never looked about him in his life before, he saw some six or eight young children come merrily trooping and whooping from one of the cottages, and disperse.  But not until they had all turned at the little garden gate, and kissed their hands to a face at the upper window: a low window enough, although the upper, for the cottage had but a story of one room above the ground.

Ascending a gentle hill for some distance, he reached a few cottages. There, looking around like a very reserved man might who had never looked around before, he saw six or eight young children happily emerging and shouting from one of the cottages, then scattering. But not before they all turned at the small garden gate and blew kisses to a face at the upper window: a low window, although it was the upper one, since the cottage only had one room above the ground.

Now, that the children should do this was nothing; but that they should do this to a face lying on the sill of the open window, turned towards them in a horizontal position, and apparently only a face, was something noticeable.  He looked up at the window again.  Could only see a very fragile though a very bright face, lying on one cheek on the window-sill.  The delicate smiling face of a girl or woman.  Framed in long bright brown hair, round which was tied a light blue band or fillet, passing under the chin.

Now, the fact that the children were doing this was one thing; but doing it to a face resting on the sill of the open window, turned towards them horizontally, and seemingly just a face, was quite noticeable. He looked back up at the window again. He could only see a very delicate yet bright face, lying on one cheek on the window-sill. The soft smiling face of a girl or woman, framed by long, bright brown hair, which was tied with a light blue ribbon or band beneath her chin.

He walked on, turned back, passed the window again, shyly glanced up again.  No change.  He struck off by a winding branch-road at the top of the hill—which he must p. 19otherwise have descended—kept the cottages in view, worked his way round at a distance so as to come out once more into the main road and be obliged to pass the cottages again.  The face still lay on the window-sill, but not so much inclined towards him.  And now there were a pair of delicate hands too.  They had the action of performing on some musical instrument, and yet it produced no sound that reached his ears.

He kept walking, turned back, passed the window again, and shyly glanced up once more. No change. He took a winding side road at the top of the hill—which he would have otherwise gone down—kept the cottages in sight, and made his way around at a distance so he could come back to the main road and have to pass the cottages again. The face was still resting on the window-sill, but it wasn’t leaning towards him as much. Now there were also a pair of delicate hands. They were moving as if playing some musical instrument, yet no sound reached his ears.

“Mugby Junction must be the maddest place in England,” said Barbox Brothers, pursuing his way down the hill.  “The first thing I find here is a Railway Porter who composes comic songs to sing at his bedside.  The second thing I find here is a face, and a pair of hands playing a musical instrument that don’t play!”

“Mugby Junction has to be the craziest place in England,” said Barbox Brothers, making his way down the hill. “The first thing I come across here is a railway porter who writes funny songs to sing in bed. The second thing I see is a face and a pair of hands playing a musical instrument that doesn’t even produce sound!”

The day was a fine bright day in the early beginning of November, the air was clear and inspiriting, and the landscape was rich in beautiful colours.  The prevailing colours in the court off Lombard-street, London city, had been few and sombre.  Sometimes, when the weather elsewhere was very bright indeed, the dwellers in those tents enjoyed a pepper-and-salt-coloured day or two, but their atmosphere’s usual wear was slate, or snuff colour.

The day was a bright, beautiful day in early November, the air was clear and uplifting, and the landscape was filled with vibrant colors. The dominant colors in the courtyard off Lombard Street, in the City of London, had mostly been dark and dull. Occasionally, when the weather was really nice elsewhere, the people living in those tents would get a day or two of mixed colors, but their usual environment was gray or brown.

He relished his walk so well, that he repeated it next day.  He was a little earlier at the cottage than on the day before, and he p. 20could hear the children up-stairs singing to a regular measure and clapping out the time with their hands.

He enjoyed his walk so much that he did it again the next day. He arrived at the cottage a bit earlier than he had the day before, and he p. 20could hear the kids upstairs singing in rhythm and clapping their hands to keep the beat.

“Still, there is no sound of any musical instrument,” he said, listening at the corner, “and yet I saw the performing hands again, as I came by.  What are the children singing?  Why, good Lord, they can never be singing the multiplication-table!”

“Still, there’s no sound of any musical instrument,” he said, listening at the corner, “and yet I saw the performing hands again as I passed by. What are the kids singing? Good Lord, they can't possibly be singing the multiplication table!”

They were though, and with infinite enjoyment.  The mysterious face had a voice attached to it which occasionally led or set the children right.  Its musical cheerfulness was delightful.  The measure at length stopped, and was succeeded by a murmuring of young voices, and then by a short song which he made out to be about the current month of the year, and about what work it yielded to the labourers in the fields and farm-yards.  Then, there was a stir of little feet, and the children came trooping and whooping out, as on the previous day.  And again, as on the previous day, they all turned at the garden gate, and kissed their hands—evidently to the face on the window-sill, though Barbox Brothers from his retired post of disadvantage at the corner could not see it.

They were, though, and with endless enjoyment. The mysterious face had a voice that sometimes guided or corrected the children. Its cheerful musical tone was delightful. Eventually, the music stopped and was followed by a murmur of young voices, and then by a short song which he recognized as being about the current month and the work it brought for the laborers in the fields and farmyards. Then, there was a flurry of little feet, and the children came charging out, cheering like they did the day before. And again, like the day before, they all turned at the garden gate and blew kisses—clearly to the face on the window sill, even though Barbox Brothers, from his hidden spot at the corner, couldn’t see it.

But as the children dispersed, he cut off one small straggler—a brown faced boy with flaxen hair—and said to him:

But as the kids scattered, he stopped one small laggard—a brown-faced boy with blonde hair—and said to him:

“Come here, little one.  Tell me whose house is that?”

“Come here, kid. Who lives in that house?”

p. 21The child, with one swarthy arm held up across his eyes, half in shyness, and half ready for defence, said from behind the inside of his elbow:

p. 21The child, with one dark arm raised across his eyes, partly out of shyness and partly in a defensive posture, spoke from behind the curve of his elbow:

“Phœbe’s.”

"Phoebe's."

“And who,” said Barbox Brothers, quite as much embarrassed by his part in the dialogue as the child could possibly be by his, “is Phœbe?”

“And who,” said Barbox Brothers, just as embarrassed by his role in the conversation as the child could be by his, “is Phœbe?”

To which the child made answer: “Why, Phœbe, of course.”

To which the child replied, “Well, Phœbe, of course.”

The small but sharp observer had eyed his questioner closely, and had taken his moral measure.  He lowered his guard, and rather assumed a tone with him: as having discovered him to be an unaccustomed person in the art of polite conversation.

The small but keen observer had watched his questioner closely and had judged his character. He let his guard down and adopted a tone with him, as if he had figured out that he was an inexperienced person in the art of polite conversation.

“Phœbe,” said the child, “can’t be anybobby else but Phœbe.  Can she?”

“Phoebe,” said the child, “can’t be anybody else but Phoebe. Can she?”

“No, I suppose not.”

"No, I guess not."

“Well,” returned the child, “then why did you ask me?”

“Well,” said the child, “then why did you ask me?”

Deeming it prudent to shift his ground, Barbox Brothers took up a new position.

Deeming it wise to change his approach, Barbox Brothers took a new position.

“What do you do there?  Up there in that room where the open window is.  What do you do there?”

“What do you do there? Up there in that room with the open window. What do you do there?”

“Cool,” said the child.

"Cool," said the kid.

“Eh?”

"Excuse me?"

“Co-o-ol,” the child repeated in a louder voice, lengthening out the word with a fixed p. 22look and great emphasis, as much as to say: “What’s the use of your having grown up, if you’re such a donkey as not to understand me?”

“Cool,” the child said again, louder this time, stretching out the word with a serious look and strong emphasis, as if to say: “What’s the point of growing up if you’re too dumb to get what I’m saying?”p. 22

“Ah!  School, school,” said Barbox Brothers.  “Yes, yes, yes.  And Phœbe teaches you?”

“Ah! School, school,” said Barbox Brothers. “Yes, yes, yes. And Phoebe teaches you?”

The child nodded.

The kid nodded.

“Good boy.”

“Good boy.”

“Tound it out, have you?” said the child.

“Told you, did you?” said the child.

“Yes, I have found it out.  What would you do with twopence, if I gave it you?”

“Yes, I've figured it out. What would you do with two pence if I gave it to you?”

“Pend it.”

"Put it on hold."

The knock-down promptitude of this reply leaving him not a leg to stand upon, Barbox Brothers produced the twopence with great lameness, and withdrew in a state of humiliation.

The quickness of this reply left him with no argument, so Barbox Brothers awkwardly handed over the two-pence and left feeling humiliated.

But, seeing the face on the window-sill as he passed the cottage, he acknowledged its presence there with a gesture, which was not a nod, not a bow, not a removal of his hat from his head, but was a diffident compromise between or struggle with all three.  The eyes in the face seemed amused, or cheered, or both, and the lips modestly said: “Good day to you, sir.”

But as he walked by the cottage and saw the face on the window sill, he acknowledged it with a gesture that was neither a nod nor a bow, nor did he take off his hat, but rather an unsure mix or struggle of all three. The eyes in the face looked amused, or pleased, or both, and the lips gently said, “Good day to you, sir.”

“I find I must stick for a time to Mugby Junction,” said Barbox Brothers, with much gravity, after once more stopping on his return road to look at the Lines where they went their several ways so quietly.  “I can’t make up my p. 23mind yet, which iron road to take.  In fact, I must get a little accustomed to the Junction before I can decide.”

“I guess I need to stay at Mugby Junction for a while,” said Barbox Brothers seriously, after pausing again on his way back to look at the tracks where they split off so quietly. “I can’t decide yet which railway to take. Really, I need to get used to the Junction a bit before I can make a choice.”

So, he announced at the Inn that he was “going to stay on, for the present,” and improved his acquaintance with the Junction that night, and again next morning, and again next night and morning: going down to the station, mingling with the people there, looking about him down all the avenues of railway, and beginning to take an interest in the incomings and outgoings of the trains.  At first, he often put his head into Lamps’s little room, but he never found Lamps there.  A pair or two of velveteen shoulders he usually found there, stooping over the fire, sometimes in connexion with a clasped knife and a piece of bread and meat; but the answer to his inquiry, “Where’s Lamps?” was, either that he was “t’other side the line,” or, that it was his off-time, or (in the latter case), his own personal introduction to another Lamps who was not his Lamps.  However, he was not so desperately set upon seeing Lamps now, but he bore the disappointment.  Nor did he so wholly devote himself to his severe application to the study of Mugby Junction, as to neglect exercise.  On the contrary, he took a walk every day, and always the same walk.  But the weather turned cold and wet again, and the window was never open.

So, he announced at the Inn that he was “going to stay on for now,” and got to know Mugby Junction that night, and again the next morning, and once more that night and morning: going down to the station, mingling with the people there, looking around all the train tracks, and starting to take an interest in the arrivals and departures of the trains. At first, he often popped his head into Lamps’s little room, but he never found Lamps there. Usually, he found a couple of velveteen shoulders stooped over the fire, sometimes with a clasped knife and a piece of bread and meat; but when he asked, “Where’s Lamps?” the answer was either that he was “on the other side of the line,” or that it was his off-time, or (in the latter case) his introduction to another Lamps who wasn’t his Lamps. However, he wasn’t so desperate to see Lamps anymore, so he handled the disappointment. Nor did he completely bury himself in studying Mugby Junction to neglect exercise. On the contrary, he took a walk every day, and it was always the same walk. But the weather turned cold and wet again, and the window was never open.

p. 24III

At length, after a lapse of some days, there came another streak of fine bright hardy autumn weather.  It was a Saturday.  The window was open, and the children were gone.  Not surprising, this, for he had patiently watched and waited at the corner, until they were gone.

At last, after a few days had passed, another spell of pleasant, vibrant autumn weather arrived. It was a Saturday. The window was open, and the children were gone. This wasn't surprising, as he had patiently watched and waited at the corner until they were gone.

“Good day,” he said to the face; absolutely getting his hat clear off his head this time.

“Good day,” he said to the face, completely managing to get his hat off his head this time.

“Good day to you, sir.”

“Good day to you.”

“I am glad you have a fine sky again, to look at.”

“I’m glad you have a nice sky to look at again.”

“Thank you, sir.  It is kind of you.”

“Thank you, sir. That’s very kind of you.”

“You are an invalid, I fear?”

"Are you hurt, I’m afraid?"

“No, sir.  I have very good health.”

“No, sir. I’m in really good health.”

“But are you not always lying down?”

“But aren't you always lying down?”

“O yes, I am always lying down, because I cannot sit up.  But I am not an invalid.”

“O yeah, I’m always lying down because I can’t sit up. But I’m not disabled.”

The laughing eyes seemed highly to enjoy his great mistake.

The laughing eyes seemed to really enjoy his big mistake.

“Would you mind taking the trouble to come in, sir?  There is a beautiful view from this window.  And you would see that I am not at all ill—being so good as to care.”

“Could you please come in, sir? There’s a beautiful view from this window. And you’d see that I’m not sick at all—thank you for caring.”

It was said to help him, as he stood irresolute, but evidently desiring to enter, with his diffident hand on the latch of the garden gate.  It did help him, and he went in.

It was said to help him as he stood uncertain, clearly wanting to go in, with his hesitant hand on the latch of the garden gate. It did help him, and he went in.

The room up-stairs was a very clean white p. 25room with a low roof.  Its only inmate lay on a couch that brought her face on a level with the window.  The couch was white too; and her simple dress or wrapper being light blue, like the band around her hair, she had an ethereal look, and a fanciful appearance of lying among clouds.  He felt that she instinctively perceived him to be by habit a downcast taciturn man; it was another help to him to have established that understanding so easily, and got it over.

The room upstairs was a really clean white p. 25room with a low ceiling. Its only occupant lay on a couch that positioned her face at the same level as the window. The couch was white too, and with her simple light blue dress or wrap, which matched the band in her hair, she had an ethereal look, almost like she was lying among clouds. He sensed that she instinctively recognized him as someone who was usually a downcast and quiet man; it was helpful for him to have established that understanding so easily and to get it out of the way.

There was an awkward constraint upon him, nevertheless, as he touched her hand, and took a chair at the side of her couch.

There was an uncomfortable tension for him, though, as he touched her hand and sat down in a chair next to her couch.

“I see now,” he began, not at all fluently, “how you occupy your hands.  Only seeing you from the path outside, I thought you were playing upon something.”

“I get it now,” he started, not very smoothly, “how you keep your hands busy. Just watching you from the path outside, I thought you were playing with something.”

She was engaged in very nimbly and dexterously making lace.  A lace-pillow lay upon her breast; and the quick movements and changes of her hands upon it as she worked, had given them the action he had misinterpreted.

She was skillfully and quickly making lace. A lace-pillow rested on her chest, and the rapid movements and shifts of her hands on it as she worked had led him to misunderstand their action.

“That is curious,” she answered, with a bright smile.  “For I often fancy, myself, that I play tunes while I am at work.”

"That's interesting," she replied with a bright smile. "Because I often imagine that I play tunes while I work."

“Have you any musical knowledge?”

“Do you have any musical knowledge?”

She shook her head.

She nodded in refusal.

“I think I could pick out tunes, if I had any instrument, which could be made as handy to p. 26me as my lace-pillow.  But I dare say I deceive myself.  At all events, I shall never know.”

“I think I could pick out tunes if I had any instrument that was as convenient for me as my lace pillow. But I guess I might be fooling myself. In any case, I’ll never find out.”

“You have a musical voice.  Excuse me; I have heard you sing.”

“You have a beautiful singing voice. Sorry to interrupt, but I’ve heard you sing.”

“With the children?” she answered, slightly colouring.  “O yes.  I sing with the dear children, if it can be called singing.”

“With the kids?” she replied, blushing a bit. “Oh yes. I sing with the sweet kids, if you can call it singing.”

Barbox Brothers glanced at the two small forms in the room, and hazarded the speculation that she was fond of children, and that she was learned in new systems of teaching them?  “Very fond of them,” she said, shaking her head again; “but I know nothing of teaching, beyond the interest I have in it, and the pleasure it gives me when they learn.  Perhaps your overhearing my little scholars sing some of their lessons, has led you so far astray as to think me a grand teacher?  Ah! I thought so!  No, I have only read and been told about that system.  It seemed so pretty and pleasant, and to treat them so like the merry Robins they are, that I took up with it in my little way.  You don’t need to be told what a very little way mine is, sir,” she added, with a glance at the small forms and round the room.

Barbox Brothers looked at the two small figures in the room and guessed that she liked kids and that she knew about new ways to teach them. “I really do like them,” she said, shaking her head again. “But I don’t know anything about teaching, apart from my interest in it and the joy it brings me when they learn. Maybe you heard my little students singing some lessons and thought I was a great teacher? Ah! I see that! No, I’ve only read about and been told about that method. It seemed so lovely and enjoyable, treating them like the cheerful Robins they are, so I picked it up in my own small way. You don’t need me to explain how very small my way is, sir,” she added, glancing at the small figures and around the room.

All this time her hands were busy at her lace-pillow.  As they still continued so, and as there was a kind of substitute for conversation in the click and play of its pegs, Barbox Brothers took the opportunity of observing her.  He guessed her to be thirty.  The charm of p. 27her transparent face and large bright brown eyes, was, not that they were passively resigned, but that they were actively and thoroughly cheerful.  Even her busy hands, which of their own thinness alone might have besought compassion, plied their task with a gay courage that made mere compassion an unjustifiable assumption of superiority, and an impertinence.

All this time, her hands were occupied with her lace pillow. As she continued to work, the clicking and playing of its pegs provided a sort of substitute for conversation, giving Barbox Brothers the chance to watch her. He guessed she was about thirty. The charm of her clear face and large, bright brown eyes came not from being passively resigned, but from an active and genuine cheerfulness. Even her busy hands, which might seem pitiful because of their thinness, approached their task with a joyful determination that made simple compassion feel like an unwarranted attitude of superiority and impolite.

He saw her eyes in the act of rising towards his, and he directed his towards the prospect, saying: “Beautiful indeed!”

He saw her eyes looking up at his, and he turned his gaze toward the view, saying, “Really beautiful!”

“Most beautiful, sir.  I have sometimes had a fancy that I would like to sit up, for once, only to try how it looks to an erect head.  But what a foolish fancy that would be to encourage!  It cannot look more lovely to any one than it does to me.”

“Most beautiful, sir. I've sometimes imagined I’d like to sit up, just to see how it looks from an upright position. But what a silly thought that would be to entertain! It couldn’t look more beautiful to anyone than it does to me.”

Her eyes were turned to it as she spoke, with most delighted admiration and enjoyment.  There was not a trace in it of any sense of deprivation.

Her eyes were fixed on it as she spoke, filled with pure delight and enjoyment. There wasn't a hint of feeling deprived in her expression.

“And those threads of railway, with their puffs of smoke and steam changing places so fast, make it so lively for me,” she went on.  “I think of the number of people who can go where they wish, on their business, or their pleasure; I remember that the puffs make signs to me that they are actually going while I look; and that enlivens the prospect with abundance of company, if I want company.  There is the great Junction, too.  I don’t see p. 28it under the foot of the hill, but I can very often hear it, and I always know it is there.  It seems to join me, in a way, to I don’t know how many places and things that I shall never see.”

“And those train tracks, with their clouds of smoke and steam moving around so quickly, make everything feel so lively for me,” she continued. “I think about how many people can go wherever they want, whether for work or for enjoyment; I remember that the smoke signals to me that they are actually traveling while I watch, and that brightens the view with lots of people, in case I want company. There’s also the big Junction. I can’t see it from the bottom of the hill, but I can often hear it, and I always know it’s there. It feels like it connects me, in a way, to so many places and things that I will never see.”

With an abashed kind of idea that it might have already joined himself to something he had never seen, he said constrainedly: “Just so.”

With a shy feeling that he might have already connected himself to something he had never seen, he said hesitantly: “Exactly.”

“And so you see, sir,” pursued Phœbe, “I am not the invalid you thought me, and I am very well off indeed.”

“And so you see, sir,” continued Phœbe, “I’m not the sickly person you thought I was, and I’m actually doing very well.”

“You have a happy disposition,” said Barbox Brothers: perhaps with a slight excusatory touch for his own disposition.

“You have a cheerful attitude,” said Barbox Brothers, maybe a little defensively about his own outlook.

“Ah!  But you should know my father,” she replied.  “His is the happy disposition!—Don’t mind, sir!”  For his reserve took the alarm at a step upon the stairs, and he distrusted that he would be set down for a troublesome intruder.  “This is my father coming.”

“Ah! But you should meet my dad,” she replied. “He has such a cheerful nature!—Don’t worry, sir!” Because he was startled by a sound on the stairs, he feared he would be seen as an annoying intruder. “That’s my dad coming.”

The door opened, and the father paused there.

The door opened, and the father stopped there.

“Why, Lamps!” exclaimed Barbox Brothers, starting from his chair.  “How do you do, Lamps?”

"Hey, Lamps!" shouted Barbox Brothers, jumping up from his chair. "How's it going, Lamps?"

To which, Lamps responded: “The gentleman for Nowhere!  How do you do, sir?”

To which, Lamps replied: “The guy from Nowhere! How's it going, sir?”

And they shook hands, to the greatest admiration and surprise of Lamps’s daughter.

And they shook hands, much to the amazement and surprise of Lamps's daughter.

“I have looked you up, half a dozen times p. 29since that night,” said Barbox Brothers, “but have never found you.”

“I’ve searched for you half a dozen times p. 29since that night,” said Barbox Brothers, “but I’ve never been able to find you.”

“So I’ve heerd on, sir, so I’ve heerd on,” returned Lamps.  “It’s your being noticed so often down at the Junction, without taking any train, that has begun to get you the name among us of the gentleman for Nowhere.  No offence in my having called you by it when took by surprise, I hope, sir?”

“So I’ve heard, sir, so I’ve heard,” Lamps replied. “It’s your frequent presence at the Junction, without actually taking any train, that has started to earn you the nickname among us of the gentleman for Nowhere. I hope you don’t take offense at me calling you that without thinking, sir?”

“None at all.  It’s as good a name for me as any other you could call me by.  But may I ask you a question in the corner here?”

“Not at all. It’s just as good a name for me as any other you could use. But can I ask you a question over here in the corner?”

Lamps suffered himself to be led aside from his daughter’s couch, by one of the buttons of his velveteen jacket.

Lamps allowed himself to be pulled away from his daughter's couch by one of the buttons on his velveteen jacket.

“Is this the bedside where you sing your songs?”

“Is this the bedside where you sing your songs?”

Lamps nodded.

Lamps flickered.

The gentleman for Nowhere clapped him on the shoulder; and they faced about again.

The guy from Nowhere patted him on the shoulder, and they turned around again.

“Upon my word, my dear,” said Lamps then to his daughter, looking from her to her visitor, “it is such an amaze to me, to find you brought acquainted with this gentleman, that I must (if this gentleman will excuse me) take a rounder.”

“Honestly, my dear,” Lamps then said to his daughter, looking between her and her visitor, “I’m so surprised to see that you know this gentleman, that I must (if this gentleman doesn’t mind) take a moment to process this.”

Mr. Lamps demonstrated in action what this meant, by pulling out his oily handkerchief rolled up in the form of a ball, and giving himself an elaborate smear, from behind the p. 30right ear, up the cheek, across the forehead, and down the other cheek to behind his left ear.  After this operation he shone exceedingly.

Mr. Lamps showed what this meant by pulling out his greasy handkerchief, which he rolled into a ball, and giving himself a detailed smear from behind his right ear, up his cheek, across his forehead, and down the other cheek to behind his left ear. After this routine, he looked very shiny.

“It’s according to my custom when particular warmed up by any agitation, sir,” he offered by way of apology.  “And really, I am throwed into that state of amaze by finding you brought acquainted with Phœbe, that I—that I think I will, if you’ll excuse me, take another rounder.”  Which he did, seeming to be greatly restored by it.

“It’s just my habit to get a bit worked up, sir,” he said as an apology. “And honestly, I’m really surprised to find you know Phœbe, that I—I think I’ll, if you don’t mind, grab another drink.” Which he did, and he seemed to feel much better afterward.

They were now both standing by the side of her couch, and she was working at her lace-pillow.  “Your daughter tells me,” said Barbox Brothers, still in a half reluctant shamefaced way, “that she never sits up.”

They were both standing next to her couch, and she was focused on her lace pillow. “Your daughter tells me,” said Barbox Brothers, still feeling somewhat embarrassed, “that she never sits up.”

“No, sir, nor never has done.  You see, her mother (who died when she was a year and two months old) was subject to very bad fits, and as she had never mentioned to me that she was subject to fits, they couldn’t be guarded against.  Consequently, she dropped the baby when took, and this happened.”

“No, sir, and she never has. You see, her mother (who passed away when she was a year and two months old) had severe seizures, and since she never told me that she had seizures, we couldn’t be prepared for it. As a result, she dropped the baby when she took her, and that’s what happened.”

“It was very wrong of her,” said Barbox Brothers, with a knitted brow, “to marry you, making a secret of her infirmity.”

“It was really wrong of her,” said Barbox Brothers, frowning, “to marry you while keeping her condition a secret.”

“Well, sir,” pleaded Lamps, in behalf of the long-deceased.  “You see, Phœbe and me, we have talked that over too.  And Lord bless us!  Such a number on us has our infirmities, p. 31what with fits, and what with misfits, of one sort and another, that if we confessed to ’em all before we got married, most of us might never get married.”

“Well, sir,” pleaded Lamps, speaking for the long-gone. “You see, Phœbe and I have discussed this too. And goodness! With how many issues we all have, between quirks and mismatches of all kinds, if we admitted to them all before getting married, most of us might never tie the knot.” p. 31

“Might not that be for the better?”

“Might that be for the better?”

“Not in this case, sir,” said Phœbe, giving her hand to her father.

“Not in this case, sir,” said Phoebe, reaching out her hand to her father.

“No, not in this case, sir,” said her father, patting it between his own.

“No, not in this case, sir,” her father said, patting it between his hands.

“You correct me,” returned Barbox Brothers, with a blush; “and I must look so like a Brute, that at all events it would be superfluous in me to confess to that infirmity.  I wish you would tell me a little more about yourselves.  I hardly know how to ask it of you, for I am conscious that I have a bad stiff manner, a dull discouraging way with me, but I wish you would.”

“You're right,” Barbox Brothers replied, blushing. “I must seem like a real jerk, so it would be pointless for me to admit to that weakness. I’d really like you to share a bit more about yourselves. I’m not sure how to ask, since I know I come off as really stiff and kind of dull, but I really wish you would.”

“With all our hearts, sir,” returned Lamps, gaily, for both.  “And first of all, that you may know my name—”

“With all our hearts, sir,” replied Lamps cheerfully, for both. “And first of all, let me tell you my name—”

“Stay!” interposed the visitor, with a slight flush.  “What signifies your name!  Lamps is name enough for me.  I like it.  It is bright and expressive.  What do I want more!”

“Wait!” the visitor interrupted, slightly blushing. “What does your name matter! Lamps is good enough for me. I like it. It’s bright and meaningful. What more do I need!”

“Why to be sure, sir,” returned Lamps.  “I have in general no other name down at the Junction; but I thought, on account of your being here as a first-class single, in a private character, that you might—”

“Of course, sir,” replied Lamps. “I usually don’t go by any other name at the Junction; but I figured, since you're here as a first-class single, in a private capacity, that you might—”

p. 32The visitor waved the thought away with his hand, and Lamps acknowledged the mark of confidence by taking another rounder.

p. 32The visitor dismissed the thought with a wave of his hand, and Lamps recognized the gesture of trust by taking another drink.

“You are hard-worked, I take for granted?” said Barbox Brothers, when the subject of the rounder came out of it much dirtier than he went into it.

“You've been working hard, haven’t you?” said Barbox Brothers, when the topic of the rounder came out much dirtier than when he went in.

Lamps was beginning, “Not particular so”—when his daughter took him up.

Lamps was starting to say, “Not exactly like that”—when his daughter interrupted him.

“O yes, sir, he is very hard-worked.  Fourteen, fifteen, eighteen, hours a day.  Sometimes twenty-four hours at a time.”

“O yes, sir, he works really hard. Fourteen, fifteen, eighteen hours a day. Sometimes even twenty-four hours straight.”

“And you,” said Barbox Brothers, “what with your school, Phœbe, and what with your lace-making—”

“And you,” said Barbox Brothers, “with your school, Phœbe, and your lace-making—”

“But my school is a pleasure to me,” she interrupted, opening her brown eyes wider, as if surprised to find him so obtuse.  “I began it when I was but a child, because it brought me and other children into company, don’t you see?  That was not work.  I carry it on still, because it keeps children about me.  That is not work.  I do it as love, not as work.  Then my lace-pillow;” her busy hands had stopped, as if her argument required all her cheerful earnestness, but now went on again at the name; “it goes with my thoughts when I think, and it goes with my tunes when I hum any, and that’s not work.  Why, you yourself thought it was music, you know, sir.  And so it is, to me.”

“But my school is a joy for me,” she interrupted, widening her brown eyes in surprise at his lack of understanding. “I started it when I was just a child because it brought me and other kids together, don’t you see? That wasn’t work. I continue it now because it keeps children around me. That isn’t work. I do it out of love, not out of work. Then my lace-pillow;” her busy hands had paused, as if her argument needed all her cheerful sincerity, but now they resumed at the mention; “it accompanies my thoughts when I think, and it matches my tunes when I hum, and that’s not work. Why, you yourself thought it was music, you know, sir. And so it is, for me.”

p. 33“Everything is!” cried Lamps, radiantly.  “Everything is music to her, sir.”

p. 33“Everything is!” shouted Lamps, excitedly. “Everything is music to her, sir.”

“My father is, at any rate,” said Phœbe, exultingly pointing her thin forefinger at him.  “There is more music in my father than there is in a brass band.”

“My dad is, for sure,” said Phœbe, excitedly pointing her thin finger at him. “There’s more music in my dad than in a brass band.”

“I say!  My dear!  It’s very fillyillially done, you know; but you are flattering your father,” he protested, sparkling.

“I say! My dear! It’s very well done, you know; but you’re flattering your father,” he protested, sparkling.

“No I am not, sir, I assure you.  No I am not.  If you could hear my father sing, you would know I am not.  But you never will hear him sing, because he never sings to any one but me.  However tired he is, he always sings to me when he comes home.  When I lay here long ago, quite a poor little broken doll, he used to sing to me.  More than that, he used to make songs, bringing in whatever little jokes we had between us.  More than that, he often does so to this day.  O! I’ll tell of you, father, as the gentleman has asked about you.  He is a poet, sir.”

“No, I’m not, sir, I promise you. No, I’m not. If you could hear my dad sing, you’d know I’m not. But you’ll never hear him sing because he only sings for me. No matter how tired he is, he always sings to me when he gets home. When I was here long ago, just a poor little broken doll, he used to sing to me. Not only that, he would make up songs, including whatever little jokes we had between us. Not only that, he still does that to this day. Oh! I’ll tell you about my dad since the gentleman has asked about him. He’s a poet, sir.”

“I shouldn’t wish the gentleman, my dear,” observed Lamps, for the moment turning grave, “to carry away that opinion of your father, because it might look as if I was given to asking the stars in a molloncolly manner what they was up to.  Which I wouldn’t at once waste the time, and take the liberty, my dear.”

“I shouldn’t want the gentleman, my dear,” said Lamps, turning serious for a moment, “to have that impression of your father, because it might seem like I was inappropriately asking the stars in a gloomy way what they were up to. Which I wouldn’t want to waste time on, or take the liberty, my dear.”

“My father,” resumed Phœbe, amending her text, “is always on the bright side, and the p. 34good side.  You told me just now, I had a happy disposition.  How can I help it?”

“My dad,” Phœbe continued, adjusting her words, “always looks on the bright side and the positive side. You just told me that I have a happy disposition. How can I help that?”

“Well! but my dear,” returned Lamps argumentatively, “how can I help it?  Put it to yourself, sir.  Look at her.  Always as you see her now.  Always working—and after all, sir, for but a very few shillings a week—always contented, always lively, always interested in others, of all sorts.  I said, this moment, she was always as you see her now.  So she is, with a difference that comes to much the same.  For, when it’s my Sunday off and the morning bells have done ringing, I hear the prayers and thanks read in the touchingest way, and I have the hymns sung to me—so soft, sir, that you couldn’t hear ’em out of this room—in notes that seem to me, I am sure, to come from Heaven and go back to it.”

“Well! But my dear,” Lamps replied, a bit defensively, “how can I change that? Think about it, sir. Look at her. Always like you see her now. Always working—and after all, sir, for only a few shillings a week—always happy, always lively, always caring about others, no matter who they are. I just said that she’s always like you see her now. And she is, with a difference that doesn’t really matter. Because, when I have my Sunday off and the morning bells have stopped ringing, I hear the prayers and thanks read in the most touching way, and I get hymns sung to me—so softly, sir, that you wouldn’t be able to hear them outside this room—with notes that seem to me, I’m sure, to come from Heaven and return to it.”

It might have been merely through the association of these words with their sacredly quiet time, or it might have been through the larger association of the words with the Redeemer’s presence beside the bedridden; but here her dexterous fingers came to a stop on the lace-pillow, and clasped themselves round his neck as he bent down.  There was great natural sensibility in both father and daughter, the visitor could easily see; but each made it, for the other’s sake, retiring, not demonstrative; and perfect cheerfulness, intuitive or acquired, was either the first or second nature of both.  p. 35In a very few moments, Lamps was taking another rounder with his comical features beaming, while Phœbe’s laughing eyes (just a glistening speck or so upon their lashes) were again directed by turns to him, and to her work, and to Barbox Brothers.

It could have just been that these words reminded her of their peaceful moments, or maybe it was the deeper connection of the words with the Redeemer being there by the sickbed; but at that moment, her skilled fingers paused on the lace pillow and wrapped around his neck as he leaned down. The visitor could easily see the strong natural sensitivity in both the father and daughter; however, each held back for the other's sake, being reserved rather than overly expressive. The cheerful demeanor, whether instinctive or learned, was second nature to both of them. p. 35In just a few moments, Lamps was making another round with his funny face shining, while Phœbe's sparkling eyes (just a few glistening specks on her lashes) alternated between him, her work, and Barbox Brothers.

“When my father, sir,” she said brightly, “tells you about my being interested in other people even though they know nothing about me—which, by-the-by, I told you myself—you ought to know how that comes about.  That’s my father’s doing.”

“Whenever my dad, sir,” she said cheerfully, “talks to you about my interest in other people, even though they don’t know anything about me—which, by the way, I already told you—you should understand how that happens. That’s my dad’s influence.”

“No, it isn’t!” he protested.

“No way!” he protested.

“Don’t you believe him, sir; yes, it is.  He tells me of everything he sees down at his work.  You would be surprised what a quantity he gets together for me every day.  He looks into the carriages, and tells me how the ladies are drest—so that I know all the fashions!  He looks into the carriages, and tells me what pairs of lovers he sees, and what new-married couples on their wedding trip—so that I know all about that!  He collects chance newspapers and books—so that I have plenty to read!  He tells me about the sick people who are travelling to try to get better—so that I know all about them!  In short, as I began by saying, he tells me everything he sees and makes out, down at his work, and you can’t think what a quantity he does see and make out.”

“Don’t believe him, sir; yes, it is true. He tells me everything he sees at work. You’d be surprised at how much he gathers for me every day. He looks into the carriages and tells me how the ladies are dressed—so I know all the trends! He looks into the carriages and tells me about the couples in love and the newlyweds on their honeymoon—so I'm aware of all that! He collects random newspapers and books—so I have plenty to read! He tells me about the sick people traveling to try to get better—so I know all about them! In short, as I mentioned before, he shares everything he sees and figures out at work, and you wouldn’t believe how much he does see and figure out.”

p. 36“As to collecting newspapers and books, my dear,” said Lamps, “it’s clear I can have no merit in that, because they’re not my perquisites.  You see, sir, it’s this way: A Guard, he’ll say to me, ‘Hallo, here you are, Lamps.  I’ve saved this paper for your daughter.  How is she agoing on?’  A Head-Porter, he’ll say to me, ‘Here!  Catch hold, Lamps.  Here’s a couple of wollumes for your daughter.  Is she pretty much where she were?’  And that’s what makes it double welcome, you see.  If she had a thousand pound in a box, they wouldn’t trouble themselves about her; but being what she is—that is, you understand,” Lamps added, somewhat hurriedly, “not having a thousand pound in a box—they take thought for her.  And as concerning the young pairs, married and unmarried, it’s only natural I should bring home what little I can about them, seeing that there’s not a Couple of either sort in the neighbourhood that don’t come of their own accord to confide in Phœbe.”

p. 36“As for collecting newspapers and books, my dear,” said Lamps, “it’s clear I don’t deserve any credit for that, since they’re not my perks. You see, sir, it’s like this: A Guard will say to me, ‘Hey, here you are, Lamps. I saved this paper for your daughter. How’s she doing?’ A Head-Porter will say to me, ‘Hey! Catch this, Lamps. Here’s a couple of volumes for your daughter. Is she doing okay?’ That’s what makes it extra special, you see. If she had a thousand pounds saved up, they wouldn’t care about her; but because she doesn’t—which you understand,” Lamps added a bit quickly, “not having a thousand pounds saved—they look out for her. And as for the young couples, married and unmarried, it’s only natural that I’d bring home whatever little I can about them, since there’s not a couple in the neighborhood that doesn’t come to confide in Phœbe.”

She raised her eyes triumphantly to Barbox Brothers, as she said:

She looked up triumphantly at Barbox Brothers as she said:

“Indeed, sir, that is true.  If I could have got up and gone to church, I don’t know how often I should have been a bridesmaid.  But if I could have done that, some girls in love might have been jealous of me, and as it is, no girl is jealous of me.  And my pillow would p. 37not have been half as ready to put the piece of cake under, as I always find it,” she added, turning her face on it with a light sigh, and a smile at her father.

“Yeah, that's true. If I could have gotten up and gone to church, I don’t know how many times I would have been a bridesmaid. But if I could have done that, some girls who are in love might have been jealous of me, and as it is, no girl is jealous of me. And my pillow wouldn’t have been half as willing to hide the piece of cake under it, as I always find it,” she said, turning her face into it with a light sigh and a smile at her dad.

The arrival of a little girl, the biggest of the scholars, now led to an understanding on the part of Barbox Brothers, that she was the domestic of the cottage, and had come to take active measures in it, attended by a pail that might have extinguished her, and a broom three times her height.  He therefore rose to take his leave, and took it; saying that if Phœbe had no objection, he would come again.

The arrival of a little girl, the oldest of the scholars, now made it clear to Barbox Brothers that she was the caretaker of the cottage and had come to get things done, carrying a pail that could have swallowed her and a broom three times her height. He then stood up to take his leave, saying that if Phœbe didn’t mind, he would come back.

He had muttered that he would come “in the course of his walks.”  The course of his walks must have been highly favourable to his return, for he returned after an interval of a single day.

He had mentioned that he would come “during his walks.” The timing of his walks must have been quite convenient for him to come back, as he returned after just one day.

“You thought you would never see me any more, I suppose?” he said to Phœbe as he touched her hand, and sat down by her couch.

“You thought you would never see me again, right?” he said to Phœbe as he touched her hand and sat down beside her couch.

“Why should I think so!” was her surprised rejoinder.

“Why should I think that!” was her surprised response.

“I took it for granted you would mistrust me.”

"I assumed you would distrust me."

“For granted, sir?  Have you been so much mistrusted?”

“For granted, sir? Have you been so distrusted?”

“I think I am justified in answering yes.  But I may have mistrusted too, on my part.  p. 38No matter just now.  We were speaking of the Junction last time.  I have passed hours there since the day before yesterday.”

“I think I’m justified in saying yes. But I might have doubted too, on my side. p. 38 Anyway, that doesn’t really matter right now. We were talking about the Junction last time. I’ve spent hours there since the day before yesterday.”

“Are you now the gentleman for Somewhere?” she asked with a smile.

“Are you the gentleman for Somewhere now?” she asked with a smile.

“Certainly for Somewhere; but I don’t yet know Where.  You would never guess what I am travelling from.  Shall I tell you?  I am travelling from my birthday.”

“Sure, it’s definitely for Somewhere; but I still don’t know where. You would never believe what I’m coming from. Should I tell you? I’m coming from my birthday.”

Her hands stopped in her work, and she looked at him with incredulous astonishment.

Her hands paused in her work, and she looked at him with disbelief.

“Yes,” said Barbox Brothers, not quite easy in his chair, “from my birthday.  I am, to myself, an unintelligible book with the earlier chapters all torn out, and thrown away.  My childhood had no grace of childhood, my youth had no charm of youth, and what can be expected from such a lost beginning?”  His eyes meeting hers as they were addressed intently to him, something seemed to stir within his breast, whispering: “Was this bed a place for the graces of childhood and the charms of youth to take to, kindly?  O shame, shame!”

“Yes,” said Barbox Brothers, shifting uncomfortably in his chair, “since my birthday. I feel like an unread book with all the early chapters torn out and thrown away. My childhood lacked the joy of childhood, my youth missed the allure of youth, and what can you expect from such a lost start?” As his eyes met hers, which were focused intently on him, something stirred within his chest, whispering: “Is this bed a place where the joys of childhood and the allure of youth could feel welcome? Oh, the shame, the shame!”

“It is a disease with me,” said Barbox Brothers, checking himself, and making as though he had a difficulty in swallowing something, “to go wrong about that.  I don’t know how I came to speak of that.  I hope it is because of an old misplaced confidence in p. 39one of your sex involving an old bitter treachery.  I don’t know.  I am all wrong together.”

“It’s a problem I have,” said Barbox Brothers, pausing and pretending to struggle to swallow something, “to mess up when it comes to that. I’m not sure how I even started talking about it. I hope it’s just an old misplaced trust in p. 39someone from your gender that’s tied to an old painful betrayal. I really don’t know. I’m completely off track.”

Her hands quietly and slowly resumed their work.  Glancing at her, he saw that her eyes were thoughtfully following them.

Her hands quietly and slowly went back to work. Looking at her, he noticed that her eyes were intently watching them.

“I am travelling from my birthday,” he resumed, “because it has always been a dreary day to me.  My first free birthday coming round some five or six weeks hence, I am travelling to put its predecessors far behind me, and to try to crush the day—or, at all events, put it out of my sight—by heaping new objects on it.”

“I’m leaving on my birthday,” he continued, “because it has always been a gloomy day for me. With my first real birthday coming up in about five or six weeks, I’m traveling to put all the past ones behind me and to try to overpower the day—or at least ignore it—by filling it with new experiences.”

As he paused, she looked at him; but only shook her head as being quite at a loss.

As he paused, she looked at him but just shook her head, clearly confused.

“This is unintelligible to your happy disposition,” he pursued, abiding by his former phrase as if there were some lingering virtue of self-defence in it: “I knew it would be, and am glad it is.  However, on this travel of mine (in which I mean to pass the rest of my days, having abandoned all thought of a fixed home), I stopped, as you heard from your father, at the Junction here.  The extent of its ramifications quite confused me as to whither I should go, from here.  I have not yet settled, being still perplexed among so many roads.  What do you think I mean to do?  How many of the branching roads can you see from your window?”

“This doesn't make sense to your cheerful attitude,” he continued, sticking to his earlier point as if there was some lingering need to defend himself: “I knew it would, and I'm glad it does. Anyway, on this journey of mine (where I plan to spend the rest of my life, having given up any idea of a permanent home), I stopped here at the Junction, as you heard from your father. The complexity of its paths totally confused me about where to go from here. I haven't made any decisions yet, still puzzled by so many routes. What do you think I'm planning to do? How many of the branching roads can you see from your window?”

p. 40Looking out, full of interest, she answered, “Seven.”

p. 40Looking out, intrigued, she replied, “Seven.”

“Seven,” said Barbox Brothers, watching her with a grave smile.  “Well! I propose to myself, at once to reduce the gross number to those very seven, and gradually to fine them down to one—the most promising for me—and to take that.”

“Seven,” said Barbox Brothers, watching her with a serious smile. “Alright! I’m going to narrow it down to those seven, and then gradually whittle it down to one—the one that seems most promising for me—and I’ll choose that one.”

“But how will you know, sir, which is the most promising?” she asked, with her brightened eyes roving over the view.

“But how will you know, sir, which one is the most promising?” she asked, her bright eyes scanning the view.

“Ah!” said Barbox Brothers, with another grave smile, and considerably improving in his ease of speech.  “To be sure.  In this way.  Where your father can pick up so much every day for a good purpose, I may once and again pick up a little for an indifferent purpose.  The gentleman for Nowhere must become still better known at the Junction.  He shall continue to explore it, until he attaches something that he has seen, heard, or found out, at the head of each of the seven roads, to the road itself.  And so his choice of a road shall be determined by his choice among his discoveries.”

“Ah!” said Barbox Brothers, with another serious smile, and becoming much more comfortable in his speech. “Of course. In this way. While your father can gather so much every day for a good cause, I might occasionally gather a bit for a less important reason. The gentleman from Nowhere must become even better known at the Junction. He will keep exploring it until he connects something he has seen, heard, or discovered to the entrance of each of the seven roads. This way, his choice of a road will be guided by his choice among his findings.”

Her hands still busy, she again glanced at the prospect, as if it comprehended something that had not been in it before, and laughed as if it yielded her new pleasure.

Her hands still working, she glanced at the view again, as if it held something that hadn’t been there before, and laughed as if it brought her fresh joy.

“But I must not forget,” said Barbox Brothers, “(having got so far) to ask a favour.  p. 41I want your help in this expedient of mine.  I want to bring you what I pick up at the heads of the seven roads that you lie here looking out at, and to compare notes with you about it.  May I?  They say two heads are better than one.  I should say myself that probably depends upon the heads concerned.  But I am quite sure, though we are so newly acquainted, that your head and your father’s have found out better things, Phœbe, than ever mine of itself discovered.”

“But I can't forget,” said Barbox Brothers, “(having come this far) to ask for a favor. p. 41I need your help with this plan of mine. I want to bring you what I find at the ends of the seven roads that you’re watching from here, and to compare notes with you about it. Is that okay? They say two heads are better than one. Personally, I think that probably depends on whose heads we're talking about. But I’m quite sure, even though we just met, that your head and your father's have discovered better things, Phœbe, than I could ever uncover on my own.”

She gave him her sympathetic right hand, in perfect rapture with his proposal, and eagerly and gratefully thanked him.

She gave him her supportive right hand, completely thrilled with his proposal, and eagerly and gratefully thanked him.

“That’s well!” said Barbox Brothers.  “Again I must not forget (having got so far) to ask a favour.  Will you shut your eyes?”

"That's great!" said Barbox Brothers. "Once again, I can't forget (now that I've come this far) to ask a favor. Will you close your eyes?"

Laughing playfully at the strange nature of the request, she did so.

Laughing playfully at the odd nature of the request, she went ahead and did it.

“Keep them shut,” said Barbox Brothers, going softly to the door, and coming back.  “You are on your honour, mind, not to open your eyes until I tell you that you may?”

“Keep them closed,” said Barbox Brothers, quietly moving to the door and back. “You promise, right, not to open your eyes until I say you can?”

“Yes!  On my honour.”

“Absolutely! I promise.”

“Good.  May I take your lace-pillow from you for a minute?”

“Great. Can I borrow your lace pillow for a minute?”

Still laughing and wondering, she removed her hands from it, and he put it aside.

Still laughing and curious, she took her hands away from it, and he set it aside.

“Tell me.  Did you see the puffs of smoke and steam made by the morning fast-train yesterday on road number seven from here?”

“Tell me. Did you see the clouds of smoke and steam from the morning express train yesterday on track seven from here?”

p. 42“Behind the elm-trees and the spire?”

p. 42“Behind the elm trees and the steeple?”

“That’s the road,” said Barbox Brothers, directing his eyes towards it.

"That's the road," Barbox Brothers said, pointing his eyes at it.

“Yes.  I watched them melt away.”

“Yeah. I saw them vanish.”

“Anything unusual in what they expressed?”

"Was there anything unusual in what they said?"

“No!” she answered merrily.

“No!” she replied happily.

“Not complimentary to me, for I was in that train.  I went—don’t open your eyes—to fetch you this, from the great ingenious town.  It is not half so large as your lace-pillow, and lies easily and lightly in its place.  These little keys are like the keys of a miniature piano, and you supply the air required with your left hand.  May you pick out delightful music from it, my dear!  For the present—you can open your eyes now—good-bye!”

“Not flattering to me because I was on that train. I went—don’t open your eyes—to bring you this, from the clever little town. It’s not nearly as large as your lace pillow and sits easily and lightly. These little keys are like the keys of a tiny piano, and you provide the air needed with your left hand. May you create beautiful music from it, my dear! For now—you can open your eyes now—goodbye!”

In his embarrassed way, he closed the door upon himself, and only saw, in doing so, that she ecstatically took the present to her bosom and caressed it.  The glimpse gladdened his heart, and yet saddened it; for so might she, if her youth had flourished in its natural course, have taken to her breast that day the slumbering music of her own child’s voice.

In his awkward way, he closed the door behind him and noticed just then that she joyfully hugged the gift to her chest and lovingly stroked it. The sight warmed his heart but also brought him sadness; for if her youth had gone as it should, she might have embraced that day the gentle sound of her own child's voice.

p. 43BARBOX BROTHERS AND CO.

With good will and earnest purpose, the gentleman for Nowhere began, on the very next day, his researches at the heads of the seven roads.  The results of his researches, as he and Phœbe afterwards set them down in fair writing, hold their due places in this veracious chronicle, from its seventeenth page, onward.  But they occupied a much longer time in the getting together than they ever will in the perusal.  And this is probably the case with most reading matter, except when it is of that highly beneficial kind (for Posterity) which is “thrown off in a few moments of leisure” by the superior poetic geniuses who scorn to take prose pains.

With goodwill and genuine intent, the gentleman from Nowhere began his research at the start of the seven roads the very next day. The findings of his research, which he and Phœbe later recorded neatly, are documented in this true account, starting from the seventeenth page onward. However, gathering this information took much longer than it will to read. This is likely true for most written works, unless they belong to that highly valuable category (for future generations) that is "jotted down in a few moments of spare time" by the exceptional poetic geniuses who refuse to put in the effort typical of prose.

It must be admitted, however, that Barbox by no means hurried himself.  His heart being in his work of good-nature, he revelled in it.  There was the joy, too (it was a true joy to him), of sometimes sitting by, listening to Phœbe as she picked out more and more discourse from her musical instrument, and as p. 44her natural taste and ear refined daily upon her first discoveries.  Besides being a pleasure, this was an occupation, and in the course of weeks it consumed hours.  It resulted that his dreaded birthday was close upon him before he had troubled himself any more about it.

It must be acknowledged, however, that Barbox certainly didn't rush himself. He was truly invested in his work, enjoying it immensely. There was also the happiness, which truly meant something to him, of sometimes sitting and listening to Phœbe as she extracted more and more melodies from her musical instrument, and as her natural taste and ear improved daily with her initial discoveries. Besides being enjoyable, this was an activity, and over the weeks it took up several hours of his time. As a result, his dreaded birthday was approaching before he really gave it any thought.

The matter was made more pressing by the unforeseen circumstance that the councils held (at which Mr. Lamps, beaming most brilliantly, on a few rare occasions assisted) respecting the road to be selected, were, after all, in no wise assisted by his investigations.  For, he had connected this interest with this road, or that interest with the other, but could deduce no reason from it for giving any road the preference.  Consequently, when the last council was holden, that part of the business stood, in the end, exactly where it had stood in the beginning.

The situation became more urgent due to the unexpected fact that the councils (where Mr. Lamps, shining brightly, occasionally contributed) regarding which road to choose were, in the end, not helped at all by his research. He had linked this interest to one road and that interest to another, but he couldn’t find any clear reason for favoring one road over the others. As a result, when the last council met, that part of the discussion was exactly where it started.

“But, sir,” remarked Phœbe, “we have only six roads after all.  Is the seventh road dumb?”

“But, sir,” Phœbe said, “we only have six roads after all. Is the seventh road silent?”

“The seventh road?  O!” said Barbox Brothers, rubbing his chin.  “That is the road I took, you know, when I went to get your little present.  That is its story, Phœbe.”

“The seventh road? O!” said Barbox Brothers, rubbing his chin. “That’s the road I took, you know, when I went to get your little present. That’s its story, Phœbe.”

“Would you mind taking that road again, sir?” she asked with hesitation.

“Would you mind taking that road again, sir?” she asked nervously.

“Not in the least; it is a great high road after all.”

“Not at all; it’s actually a major highway after all.”

p. 45“I should like you to take it,” returned Phœbe, with a persuasive smile, “for the love of that little present which must ever be so dear to me.  I should like you to take it, because that road can never be again, like any other road to me.  I should like you to take it, in remembrance of your having done me so much good: of your having made me so much happier!  If you leave me by the road you travelled when you went to do me this great kindness,” sounding a faint chord as she spoke, “I shall feel, lying here watching at my window, as if it must conduct you to a prosperous end, and bring you back some day.”

p. 45“I really want you to take it,” Phœbe said with a charming smile, “for the sake of that little gift that I'll always treasure. I want you to take it because that path will never feel the same to me again. I want you to take it as a reminder of how much good you’ve done for me and how much happier you’ve made me! If you leave me by the road you took when you came to help me,” she said, striking a soft note as she spoke, “I will feel, lying here watching from my window, that it’s bound to lead you to a successful outcome and eventually bring you back.”

“It shall be done, my dear; it shall be done.”

“It will be done, my dear; it will be done.”

So at last the gentleman for Nowhere took a ticket for Somewhere, and his destination was the great ingenious town.

So finally, the gentleman from Nowhere bought a ticket to Somewhere, and his destination was the brilliant city.

He had loitered so long about the Junction that it was the eighteenth of December when he left it.  “High time,” he reflected, as he seated himself in the train, “that I started in earnest!  Only one clear day remains between me and the day I am running away from.  I’ll push onward for the hill-country to-morrow.  I’ll go to Wales.”

He had hung around the Junction for so long that it was the eighteenth of December when he finally left. “It’s about time,” he thought as he settled into his seat on the train, “that I really get going! There’s only one full day left before the day I’m trying to escape. Tomorrow, I’ll head for the hills. I’m going to Wales.”

It was with some pains that he placed before himself the undeniable advantages to be gained in the way of novel occupation for his senses from misty mountains, swollen streams, rain, p. 46cold, a wild seashore, and rugged roads.  And yet he scarcely made them out as distinctly as he could have wished.  Whether the poor girl, in spite of her new resource, her music, would have any feeling of loneliness upon her now—just at first—that she had not had before; whether she saw those very puffs of steam and smoke that he saw, as he sat in the train thinking of her; whether her face would have any pensive shadow on it as they died out of the distant view from her window; whether, in telling him he had done her so much good, she had not unconsciously corrected his old moody bemoaning of his station in life, by setting him thinking that a man might be a great healer, if he would, and yet not be a great doctor; these and other similar meditations got between him and his Welsh picture.  There was within him, too, that dull sense of vacuity which follows separation from an object of interest, and cessation of a pleasant pursuit; and this sense, being quite new to him, made him restless.  Further, in losing Mugby Junction he had found himself again; and he was not the more enamoured of himself for having lately passed his time in better company.

He struggled to remind himself of the undeniable benefits he could gain from the misty mountains, swollen streams, rain, cold, wild seashore, and rugged roads. Yet, he didn’t quite grasp them as clearly as he would have liked. He wondered if the poor girl, despite her new outlet—the music—would feel any loneliness now, at least for a bit, that she hadn’t felt before; whether she noticed the same puffs of steam and smoke he saw while sitting on the train thinking about her; whether her face would show any thoughtful shadow as they faded from her view out the window; whether, in telling him he had done her so much good, she had inadvertently corrected his old, moody complaints about his life by making him think that a man could be a great healer, if he chose to be, without being a great doctor. These and other similar thoughts got in the way of his Welsh image. He also felt that dull emptiness that comes with being separated from something interesting and stopping a pleasurable pursuit; this feeling, which was new to him, made him anxious. Moreover, in losing Mugby Junction, he found himself again, and he wasn’t particularly fond of himself after spending time in better company.

But surely, here not far ahead, must be the great ingenious town.  This crashing and clashing that the train was undergoing, and this coupling on to it of a multitude of new p. 47echoes, could mean nothing less than approach to the great station.  It did mean nothing less.  After some stormy flashes of town lightning, in the way of swift revelations of red-brick blocks of houses, high red-brick chimney-shafts, vistas of red-brick railway arches, tongues of fire, blots of smoke, valleys of canal, and hills of coal, there came the thundering in at the journey’s end.

But surely, just up ahead, must be the amazing city. The crashing and clashing that the train was experiencing, along with the connection of countless new p. 47echoes, could only mean we were getting close to the big station. And it did mean exactly that. After some intense flashes of city lights, revealing quick views of red-brick buildings, tall red-brick chimneys, stretches of red-brick railway arches, flames, plumes of smoke, waterways, and piles of coal, we thundered in at the end of our journey.

Having seen his portmanteaus safely housed in the hotel he chose, and having appointed his dinner-hour, Barbox Brothers went out for a walk in the busy streets.  And now it began to be suspected by him that Mugby Junction was a Junction of many branches, invisible as well as visible, and had joined him to an endless number of byways.  For, whereas he would, but a little while ago, have walked these streets blindly brooding, he now had eyes and thoughts for a new external world.  How the many toiling people lived, and loved, and died; how wonderful it was to consider the various trainings of eye and hand, the nice distinctions of sight and touch, that separated them into classes of workers, and even into classes of workers at subdivisions of one complete whole which combined their many intelligences and forces, though of itself but some cheap object of use or ornament in common life; how good it was to know that such assembling in a multitude on their part, p. 48and such contribution of their several dexterities towards a civilising end, did not deteriorate them as it was the fashion of the supercilious May-flies of humanity to pretend, but engendered among them a self-respect and yet a modest desire to be much wiser than they were (the first evinced in their well-balanced bearing and manner of speech when he stopped to ask a question; the second, in the announcements of their popular studies and amusements on the public walls); these considerations, and a host of such, made his walk a memorable one.  “I too am but a little part of a great whole,” he began to think; “and to be serviceable to myself and others, or to be happy, I must cast my interest into, and draw it out of, the common stock.”

Having checked in his luggage at the hotel he picked and set his dinner time, Barbox Brothers went out for a walk in the busy streets. He started to suspect that Mugby Junction was a hub with many unseen branches and had connected him to countless side streets. Just a short while ago, he would have walked these streets lost in thought, but now he was aware of a new outside world. He marveled at how the many people toiled, loved, and died; how fascinating it was to consider the different ways they trained their eyes and hands, the subtle distinctions of sight and touch that divided them into categories of workers, and even into subdivisions of a unified whole that combined their various skills and efforts, even if it resulted in just some inexpensive item of use or decoration in everyday life. It felt good to realize that their gathering in large numbers and their contributions of skill towards a broader purpose didn’t diminish them, as the arrogant elites of society might suggest, but instead fostered a sense of self-respect and a humble desire to gain more knowledge than they possessed (the first shown in their composed demeanor and way of speaking when he stopped to ask a question; the second reflected in the notices of their popular studies and activities posted on public walls); these reflections, among many others, made his walk unforgettable. “I too am just a small part of a larger whole,” he began to think; “and to be useful to myself and others, or to be happy, I need to invest my interests in, and draw from, the common good.”

Although he had arrived at his journey’s end for the day by noon, he had since insensibly walked about the town so far and so long that the lamplighters were now at their work in the streets, and the shops were sparkling up brilliantly.  Thus reminded to turn towards his quarters, he was in the act of doing so, when a very little hand crept into his, and a very little voice said:

Although he had reached his destination for the day by noon, he had unknowingly wandered around the town for so long that the lamplighters were now working in the streets, and the shops were lighting up brilliantly. Just as he remembered to head back to his place, a tiny hand slipped into his, and a small voice said:

“O!  If you please, I am lost.”

“O! If you don’t mind, I’m lost.”

He looked down, and saw a very little fair-haired girl.

He looked down and saw a tiny blonde girl.

“Yes,” she said, confirming her words with a serious nod.  “I am indeed.  I am lost.”

“Yes,” she said, nodding seriously to confirm her words. “I really am. I feel lost.”

p. 49Greatly perplexed, he stopped, looked about him for help, descried none, and said, bending low: “Where do you live, my child?”

p. 49Feeling really confused, he paused, glanced around for help, saw none, and said, leaning down: “Where do you live, kid?”

“I don’t know where I live,” she returned.  “I am lost.”

“I don’t know where I am,” she replied. “I’m lost.”

“What is your name?”

"What's your name?"

“Polly.”

"Polly."

“What is your other name?”

“What’s your other name?”

The reply was prompt, but unintelligible.

The response was quick, but unclear.

Imitating the sound, as he caught it, he hazarded the guess, “Trivits?”

Imitating the sound as he heard it, he took a guess, “Trivits?”

“O no!” said the child, shaking her head.  “Nothing like that.”

“O no!” the child said, shaking her head. “Nothing like that.”

“Say it again, little one.”

“Say that again, kiddo.”

An unpromising business.  For this time it had quite a different sound.

An unlikely business. This time it had a totally different vibe.

He made the venture: “Paddens?”

He took the leap: “Paddens?”

“O no!” said the child.  “Nothing like that.”

“O no!” said the child. “Nothing like that.”

“Once more.  Let us try it again, dear.”

“Once more. Let’s try it again, dear.”

A most hopeless business.  This time it swelled into four syllables.  “It can’t be Tappitarver?” said Barbox Brothers, rubbing his head with his hat in discomfiture.

A really hopeless situation. This time it stretched into four syllables. “It can’t be Tappitarver?” said Barbox Brothers, rubbing his head with his hat in frustration.

“No!  It ain’t,” the child quietly assented.

“No! It isn’t,” the child quietly agreed.

On her trying this unfortunate name once more, with extraordinary efforts at distinctness, it swelled into eight syllables at least.

On her attempt to say this unfortunate name again, with great effort to be clear, it stretched into at least eight syllables.

“Ah! I think,” said Barbox Brothers, with a desperate air of resignation, “that we had better give it up.”

“Ah! I think,” said Barbox Brothers, with a desperate air of resignation, “that we should just give it up.”

p. 50“But I am lost,” said the child, nestling her little hand more closely in his, “and you’ll take care of me, won’t you?”

p. 50“But I’m lost,” said the child, clutching his hand tighter, “and you’ll look after me, right?”

If ever a man were disconcerted by division between compassion on the one hand, and the very imbecility of irresolution on the other, here the man was.  “Lost!” he repeated, looking down at the child.  “I am sure I am.  What is to be done!”

If there was ever a man confused by the conflict between kindness on one side and the foolishness of being indecisive on the other, it was him. “Lost!” he repeated, looking at the child. “I know I am. What should I do!”

“Where do you live?” asked the child, looking up at him, wistfully.

“Where do you live?” the child asked, looking up at him with a sense of longing.

“Over there,” he answered, pointing vaguely in the direction of his hotel.

“Over there,” he replied, gesturing vaguely toward his hotel.

“Hadn’t we better go there?” said the child.

“Shouldn’t we go there?” said the child.

“Really,” he replied, “I don’t know but what we had.”

“Honestly,” he replied, “I don’t know what we had.”

So they set off, hand in hand.  He, through comparison of himself against his little companion, with a clumsy feeling on him as if he had just developed into a foolish giant.  She, clearly elevated in her own tiny opinion by having got him so neatly out of his embarrassment.

So they set off, hand in hand. He felt a bit awkward, like he had suddenly turned into a silly giant when he compared himself to his little companion. She, clearly feeling quite proud of herself for helping him out of his embarrassment, walked with a sense of achievement.

“We are going to have dinner when we get there, I suppose?” said Polly.

“We're going to have dinner when we get there, right?” said Polly.

“Well,” he rejoined, “I—yes, I suppose we are.”

“Well,” he replied, “I—yeah, I guess we are.”

“Do you like your dinner?” asked the child.

“Do you like your dinner?” the child asked.

“Why, on the whole,” said Barbox Brothers, “yes, I think I do.”

“Why, overall,” said Barbox Brothers, “yes, I think I do.”

p. 51“I do mine,” said Polly.  “Have you any brothers and sisters?”

p. 51“I have,” said Polly. “Do you have any siblings?”

“No.  Have you?”

“No. Have you?”

“Mine are dead.”

"My family is gone."

“Oh!” said Barbox Brothers.  With that absurd sense of unwieldiness of mind and body weighing him down, he would have not known how to pursue the conversation beyond this curt rejoinder, but that the child was always ready for him.

“Oh!” said Barbox Brothers. With that awkward heaviness of mind and body making it hard for him to think, he wouldn't have known how to keep the conversation going beyond this short reply, but the child was always ready for him.

“What,” she asked, turning her soft hand coaxingly in his, “are you going to do to amuse me, after dinner?”

“What,” she asked, gently turning her soft hand in his, “are you going to do to entertain me after dinner?”

“Upon my soul, Polly,” exclaimed Barbox Brothers, very much at a loss, “I have not the slightest idea!”

“Honestly, Polly,” Barbox Brothers exclaimed, clearly confused, “I have no idea at all!”

“Then I tell you what,” said Polly.  “Have you got any cards at your house?”

“Then let me tell you something,” said Polly. “Do you have any cards at your place?”

“Plenty,” said Barbox Brothers, in a boastful vein.

“Plenty,” said Barbox Brothers, confidently.

“Very well.  Then I’ll build houses, and you shall look at me.  You mustn’t blow, you know.”

“Alright. Then I'll build houses, and you can watch me. Just don’t blow, okay?”

“O no!” said Barbox Brothers.  “No, no, no.  No blowing.  Blowing’s not fair.”

“O no!” said Barbox Brothers. “No, no, no. No blowing. Blowing isn’t fair.”

He flattered himself that he had said this pretty well for an idiotic Monster; but the child, instantly perceiving the awkwardness of his attempt to adapt himself to her level, utterly destroyed his hopeful opinion of himself p. 52by saying, compassionately: “What a funny man you are!”

He thought he had expressed this quite nicely for a clueless monster; but the child, immediately noticing how awkward his effort to fit in with her was, completely shattered his positive self-image by saying, compassionately: “What a funny man you are!” p. 52

Feeling, after this melancholy failure, as if he every minute grew bigger and heavier in person, and weaker in mind, Barbox gave himself up for a bad job.  No giant ever submitted more meekly to be led in triumph by all-conquering Jack, than he to be bound in slavery to Polly.

Feeling, after this sad failure, like he was getting bigger and heavier physically while growing weaker mentally, Barbox resigned himself to being a lost cause. No giant ever surrendered more submissively to the victorious Jack than he did to being enslaved by Polly.

“Do you know any stories?” she asked him.

“Do you know any stories?” she asked him.

He was reduced to the humiliating confession: “No.”

He was forced to make the embarrassing confession: “No.”

“What a dunce you must be, mustn’t you?” said Polly.

“What a fool you must be, right?” said Polly.

He was reduced to the humiliating confession: “Yes.”

He was left with the embarrassing admission: “Yes.”

“Would you like me to teach you a story?  But you must remember it, you know, and be able to tell it right to somebody else afterwards.”

“Do you want me to tell you a story? But you have to remember it, okay, and be able to tell it correctly to someone else later.”

He professed that it would afford him the highest mental gratification to be taught a story, and that he would humbly endeavour to retain it in his mind.  Whereupon Polly, giving her hand a new little turn in his, expressive of settling down for enjoyment, commenced a long romance, of which every relishing clause began with the words: “So this” or “And so this.”  As, “So this boy;” or, “So this fairy;” or, “And so this pie was four yards round, and two yards and a quarter deep.”  p. 53The interest of the romance was derived from the intervention of this fairy to punish this boy for having a greedy appetite.  To achieve which purpose, this fairy made this pie, and this boy ate and ate and ate, and his cheeks swelled and swelled and swelled.  There were many tributary circumstances, but the forcible interest culminated in the total consumption of this pie, and the bursting of this boy.  Truly he was a fine sight, Barbox Brothers, with serious attentive face, and ear bent down, much jostled on the pavements of the busy town, but afraid of losing a single incident of the epic, lest he should be examined in it by-and-by and found deficient.

He said it would give him the greatest pleasure to hear a story, and he would try his best to remember it. So, Polly, with a little twist of her hand in his, signaling she was ready to enjoy, started telling a long tale, where every exciting part began with the phrases: “So this” or “And so this.” Like, “So this boy;” or, “So this fairy;” or, “And so this pie was four yards wide and two yards and a quarter deep.” The story’s excitement came from this fairy stepping in to punish this boy for being greedy. To do that, the fairy made this pie, and the boy just kept eating and eating and eating, with his cheeks swelling and swelling and swelling. There were many other things happening, but the main excitement peaked when the boy totally devoured the pie and burst. Truly, he was a sight to see, Barbox Brothers, with a serious look on his face and his ear down, jostled by the busy town’s streets, afraid to miss even a single detail of the story, worried that he’d be quizzed later and found lacking. p. 53

Thus they arrived at the hotel.  And there he had to say at the bar, and said awkwardly enough: “I have found a little girl!”

Thus they arrived at the hotel. And there he had to say at the bar, and said awkwardly enough: “I’ve found a little girl!”

The whole establishment turned out to look at the little girl.  Nobody knew her; nobody could make out her name, as she set it forth—except one chambermaid, who said it was Constantinople—which it wasn’t.

The entire place gathered to stare at the little girl. Nobody recognized her; no one could figure out her name, as she stated it—except for one chambermaid, who said it was Constantinople—which it wasn’t.

“I will dine with my young friend in a private room,” said Barbox Brothers to the hotel authorities, “and perhaps you will be so good as let the police know that the pretty baby is here.  I suppose she is sure to be inquired for, soon, if she has not been already.  Come along, Polly.”

“I'll have dinner with my young friend in a private room,” Barbox Brothers told the hotel staff, “and maybe you could be so kind as to inform the police that the pretty baby is here. I assume someone will be looking for her soon if they haven’t already. Let’s go, Polly.”

Perfectly at ease and peace, Polly came p. 54along, but, finding the stairs rather stiff work, was carried up by Barbox Brothers.  The dinner was a most transcendent success, and the Barbox sheepishness, under Polly’s directions how to mince her meat for her, and how to diffuse gravy over the plate with a liberal and equal hand, was another fine sight.

Perfectly at ease and peaceful, Polly came p. 54along, but, finding the stairs a bit tricky, was carried up by Barbox Brothers. The dinner was a huge success, and watching the Barbox awkwardness as Polly instructed them on how to cut her meat and distribute gravy evenly across the plate was another entertaining sight.

“And now,” said Polly, “while we are at dinner, you be good, and tell me that story I taught you.”

“And now,” Polly said, “while we’re at dinner, be nice and tell me that story I taught you.”

With the tremors of a civil service examination on him, and very uncertain indeed, not only as to the epoch at which the pie appeared in history, but also as to the measurements of that indispensable fact, Barbox Brothers made a shaky beginning, but under encouragement did very fairly.  There was a want of breadth observable in his rendering of the cheeks, as well as the appetite, of the boy; and there was a certain tameness in his fairy, referable to an under-current of desire to account for her.  Still, as the first lumbering performance of a good-humoured monster, it passed muster.

Feeling the pressure of a civil service exam and quite unsure, not only about when the pie showed up in history but also about its essential measurements, Barbox Brothers started off wobbly but improved with some encouragement. His interpretation of the boy's cheeks and hunger lacked depth, and there was a certain dullness in his fairy, stemming from an underlying desire to explain her. Still, as the initial clumsy effort of a good-natured giant, it was acceptable.

“I told you to be good,” said Polly, “and you are good, ain’t you?”

“I told you to behave,” said Polly, “and you are behaving, right?”

“I hope so,” replied Barbox Brothers.

“I hope so,” replied Barbox Brothers.

Such was his deference that Polly, elevated on a platform of sofa-cushions in a chair at his right hand, encouraged him with a pat or two on the face from the greasy bowl of her spoon, and even with a gracious kiss.  In getting on p. 55her feet upon her chair, however, to give him this last reward, she toppled forward among the dishes, and caused him to exclaim as he effected her rescue: “Gracious Angels!  Whew!  I thought we were in the fire, Polly!”

His respect was so great that Polly, perched on a pile of sofa cushions in a chair next to him, encouraged him with a few pats on the face using the greasy bowl of her spoon, and even gave him a generous kiss. However, when she stood up on her chair to give him that last reward, she toppled forward among the dishes, making him exclaim as he helped her up: “Gracious Angels! Whew! I thought we were in the fire, Polly!” p. 55

“What a coward you are, ain’t you?” said Polly, when replaced.

“What a coward you are, aren’t you?” said Polly, when replaced.

“Yes, I am rather nervous,” he replied.  “Whew!  Don’t, Polly!  Don’t flourish your spoon, or you’ll go over sideways.  Don’t tilt up your legs when you laugh, Polly, or you’ll go over backwards.  Whew!  Polly, Polly, Polly,” said Barbox Brothers, nearly succumbing to despair, “we are environed with dangers!”

“Yes, I’m pretty nervous,” he replied. “Whoa! Don’t, Polly! Don’t wave your spoon around, or you’ll tip over. Don’t kick up your legs when you laugh, Polly, or you’ll fall back. Whoa! Polly, Polly, Polly,” said Barbox Brothers, almost giving in to despair, “we’re surrounded by dangers!”

Indeed, he could descry no security from the pitfalls that were yawning for Polly, but in proposing to her, after dinner, to sit upon a low stool.  “I will, if you will,” said Polly.  So, as peace of mind should go before all, he begged the waiter to wheel aside the table, bring a pack of cards, a couple of footstools, and a screen, and close in Polly and himself before the fire, as it were in a snug room within the room.  Then, finest sight of all, was Barbox Brothers on his footstool, with a pint decanter on the rug, contemplating Polly as she built successfully, and growing blue in the face with holding his breath, lest he should blow the house down.

He really couldn’t see any way to protect Polly from the dangers that were waiting for her, but he suggested, after dinner, that they sit on a low stool together. “I’ll do it if you will,” said Polly. So, prioritizing peace of mind, he asked the waiter to move the table aside, bring a deck of cards, a couple of footstools, and a screen, creating a cozy space for him and Polly by the fire, almost like a little room within the room. The best part was seeing Barbox Brothers on his footstool, with a pint decanter on the rug, watching Polly as she successfully built her game, turning blue in the face from holding his breath, afraid he might accidentally ruin everything.

“How you stare, don’t you?” said Polly, in a houseless pause.

“How you stare, don’t you?” Polly said during an awkward silence.

p. 56Detected in the ignoble fact, he felt obliged to admit, apologetically: “I am afraid I was looking rather hard at you, Polly.”

p. 56Realizing the awkward truth, he felt he had to apologize: “I’m sorry, I was staring at you, Polly.”

“Why do you stare?” asked Polly.

“Why are you staring?” asked Polly.

“I cannot,” he murmured to himself, “recall why.—I don’t know, Polly.”

“I can’t,” he muttered to himself, “remember why.—I don’t know, Polly.”

“You must be a simpleton to do things and not know why, mustn’t you?” said Polly.

"You have to be clueless to do things without knowing why, right?" said Polly.

In spite of which reproof, he looked at the child again, intently, as she bent her head over her card-structure, her rich curls shading her face.  “It is impossible,” he thought, “that I can ever have seen this pretty baby before.  Can I have dreamed of her?  In some sorrowful dream?”

In spite of that reprimand, he looked at the child again, focused, as she leaned her head over her card tower, her beautiful curls framing her face. “It’s impossible,” he thought, “that I’ve ever seen this cute little girl before. Could I have dreamed about her? In some sad dream?”

He could make nothing of it.  So he went into the building trade as a journeyman under Polly, and they built three stories high, four stories high: even five.

He couldn't make sense of it. So, he got into the construction business as a journeyman under Polly, and they built three stories high, four stories high: even five.

“I say.  Who do you think is coming?” asked Polly, rubbing her eyes after tea.

“I don't know. Who do you think is coming?” asked Polly, rubbing her eyes after tea.

He guessed: “The waiter?”

He guessed, “The server?”

“No,” said Polly, “the dustman.  I am getting sleepy.”

“No,” said Polly, “the trash collector. I’m getting sleepy.”

A new embarrassment for Barbox Brothers!

A new embarrassment for Barbox Brothers!

“I don’t think I am going to be fetched to-night,” said Polly; “what do you think?”

“I don’t think anyone is coming to get me tonight,” said Polly; “what do you think?”

He thought not, either.  After another quarter of an hour, the dustman not merely impending but actually arriving, recourse was had to the Constantinopolitan chambermaid: p. 57who cheerily undertook that the child should sleep in a comfortable and wholesome room, which she herself would share.

He didn’t think about it either. After another fifteen minutes, the garbage collector was not just about to arrive but was actually there, so they turned to the Constantinopolitan maid: p. 57who happily agreed that the child could sleep in a nice and healthy room, which she would share herself.

“And I know you will be careful, won’t you,” said Barbox Brothers, as a new fear dawned upon him, “that she don’t fall out of bed.”

“And I know you will be careful, right?” said Barbox Brothers, as a new fear hit him, “that she doesn’t fall out of bed.”

Polly found this so highly entertaining that she was under the necessity of clutching him round the neck with both arms as he sat on his footstool picking up the cards, and rocking him to and fro, with her dimpled chin on his shoulder.

Polly found this so entertaining that she had to wrap both arms around his neck while he sat on his footstool picking up the cards, rocking him back and forth with her adorable chin resting on his shoulder.

“O what a coward you are, ain’t you!” said Polly.  “Do you fall out of bed?”

“O what a coward you are, aren’t you!” said Polly. “Do you fall out of bed?”

“N—not generally, Polly.”

"Not really, Polly."

“No more do I.”

"Not anymore."

With that, Polly gave him a reassuring hug or two to keep him going, and then giving that confiding mite of a hand of hers to be swallowed up in the hand of the Constantinopolitan chambermaid, trotted off, chattering, without a vestige of anxiety.

With that, Polly gave him a couple of reassuring hugs to keep his spirits up, and then, handing over her tiny hand to the Constantinopolitan maid, she trotted off, chatting away, without a hint of worry.

He looked after her, had the screen removed and the table and chairs replaced, and still looked after her.  He paced the room for half an hour.  “A most engaging little creature, but it’s not that.  A most winning little voice, but it’s not that.  That has much to do with it, but there is something more.  How can it be that I seem to know this child?  What p. 58was it she imperfectly recalled to me when I felt her touch in the street, and, looking down at her, saw her looking up at me?”

He took care of her, had the screen taken down, and replaced the table and chairs, and still continued to watch over her. He walked around the room for half an hour. “Such an intriguing little person, but that’s not it. Such a charming little voice, but that’s not it either. That certainly plays a part, but there’s something more. How is it that I feel like I know this child? What p. 58was it that she vaguely reminded me of when I felt her touch in the street, and, looking down at her, saw her looking up at me?”

“Mr. Jackson!”

"Mr. Jackson!"

With a start he turned towards the sound of the subdued voice, and saw his answer standing at the door.

With a jolt, he turned toward the sound of the quiet voice and saw his answer standing at the door.

“O Mr. Jackson, do not be severe with me.  Speak a word of encouragement to me, I beseech you.”

“O Mr. Jackson, please don’t be harsh with me. Just say a kind word to me, I beg you.”

“You are Polly’s mother.”

"You're Polly's mom."

“Yes.”

"Yep."

Yes.  Polly herself might come to this, one day.  As you see what the rose was, in its faded leaves; as you see what the summer growth of the woods was, in their wintry branches; so Polly might be traced, one day, in a care-worn woman like this, with her hair turned grey.  Before him, were the ashes of a dead fire that had once burned bright.  This was the woman he had loved.  This was the woman he had lost.  Such had been the constancy of his imagination to her, so had Time spared her under its withholding, that now, seeing how roughly the inexorable hand had struck her, his soul was filled with pity and amazement.

Yes. Polly herself might end up like this one day. Just as you see what the rose was in its faded leaves, and what the summer growth of the woods was in their wintry branches, Polly might be recognized one day as a weary woman like this, with her hair turned gray. In front of him were the ashes of a fire that had once burned brightly. This was the woman he had loved. This was the woman he had lost. His imagination had been so constant in its devotion to her, and Time had held back from fully claiming her, that now, witnessing how harshly the inevitable hand of time had struck her, his soul was filled with pity and amazement.

He led her to a chair, and stood leaning on a corner of the chimney-piece, with his head resting on his hand, and his face half averted.

He guided her to a chair and leaned against the corner of the fireplace, resting his head on his hand with his face turned slightly away.

p. 59“Did you see me in the street, and show me to your child?” he asked.

p. 59“Did you see me on the street and point me out to your kid?” he asked.

“Yes.”

"Yeah."

“Is the little creature, then, a party to deceit?”

“Is the little creature, then, involved in deceit?”

“I hope there is no deceit.  I said to her, ‘We have lost our way, and I must try to find mine by myself.  Go to that gentleman and tell him you are lost.  You shall be fetched by-and-by.’  Perhaps you have not thought how very young she is?”

“I hope there’s no trickery. I told her, ‘We’ve lost our way, and I need to find mine on my own. Go to that man and tell him you're lost. Someone will come get you soon.’ Maybe you haven’t considered how incredibly young she is?”

“She is very self-reliant.”

“She is very independent.”

“Perhaps because she is so young?”

“Maybe it’s because she’s so young?”

He asked, after a short pause, “Why did you do this?”

He asked, after a brief pause, “Why did you do this?”

“O Mr. Jackson, do you ask me?  In the hope that you might see something in my innocent child to soften your heart towards me.  Not only towards me, but towards my husband.”

“O Mr. Jackson, are you asking me? In the hope that you might see something in my innocent child that could soften your heart towards me. Not just towards me, but also towards my husband.”

He suddenly turned about, and walked to the opposite end of the room.  He came back again with a slower step, and resumed his former attitude, saying:

He suddenly turned around and walked to the other side of the room. He returned with a slower pace and took up his previous position, saying:

“I thought you had emigrated to America?”

“I thought you moved to America?”

“We did.  But life went ill with us there, and we came back.”

“We did. But things went badly for us there, and we came back.”

“Do you live in this town?”

“Do you live in this town?”

“Yes.  I am a daily teacher of music here.  My husband is a book-keeper.”

“Yes. I teach music here every day. My husband is a bookkeeper.”

“Are you—forgive my asking—poor?”

“Are you—sorry to ask—broke?”

p. 60“We earn enough for our wants.  That is not our distress.  My husband is very, very ill of a lingering disorder.  He will never recover—”

p. 60“We make enough for what we need. That’s not our problem. My husband is really, really sick with a long-lasting illness. He’s not going to get better—”

“You check yourself.  If it is for want of the encouraging word you spoke of, take it from me.  I cannot forget the old time, Beatrice.”

“You take a moment to reflect. If it's because of the encouraging words you mentioned, believe me when I say this: I can’t forget the past, Beatrice.”

“God bless you!” she replied, with a burst of tears, and gave him her trembling hand.

“God bless you!” she responded, tears streaming down her face, and offered him her shaking hand.

“Compose yourself.  I cannot be composed if you are not, for to see you weep distresses me beyond expression.  Speak freely to me.  Trust me.”

“Calm down. I can’t be calm if you’re not, because seeing you cry upsets me more than I can say. Open up to me. Trust me.”

She shaded her face with her veil, and after a little while spoke calmly.  Her voice had the ring of Polly’s.

She covered her face with her veil, and after a bit, spoke in a calm voice. Her voice echoed Polly’s.

“It is not that my husband’s mind is at all impaired by his bodily suffering, for I assure you that is not the case.  But in his weakness, and in his knowledge that he is incurably ill, he cannot overcome the ascendancy of one idea.  It preys upon him, embitters every moment of his painful life, and will shorten it.”

“It’s not that my husband’s mind is in any way affected by his physical pain; I promise you that isn’t true. But in his weakness, and knowing he is terminally ill, he can’t shake off the dominance of one thought. It torments him, poisons every moment of his suffering, and will shorten his life.”

She stopping, he said again: “Speak freely to me.  Trust me.”

She stopped, and he said again, “Speak freely to me. Trust me.”

“We have had five children before this darling, and they all lie in their little graves.  He believes that they have withered away under a curse, and that it will blight this child like the rest.”

“We’ve had five kids before this little one, and they’re all resting in their tiny graves. He thinks they withered away because of a curse, and that it will affect this child just like the others.”

p. 61“Under what curse?”

"Under what spell?"

“Both I and he have it on our conscience that we tried you very heavily, and I do not know but that, if I were as ill as he, I might suffer in my mind as he does.  This is the constant burden:—‘I believe, Beatrice, I was the only friend that Mr. Jackson ever cared to make, though I was so much his junior.  The more influence he acquired in the business, the higher he advanced me, and I was alone in his private confidence.  I came between him and you, and I took you from him.  We were both secret, and the blow fell when he was wholly unprepared.  The anguish it caused a man so compressed, must have been terrible; the wrath it awakened, inappeasable.  So, a curse came to be invoked on our poor pretty little flowers, and they fall.’”

“Both he and I feel guilty about how we pushed you hard, and I can’t help but think that if I were as unwell as he is, I’d be just as troubled in my mind. This is the constant weight:—‘I believe, Beatrice, I was the only friend Mr. Jackson ever wanted to have, even though I was much younger than him. The more power he gained in the business, the more he promoted me, and I was the only one he trusted with his personal matters. I came between him and you, and I took you away from him. We both kept secrets, and the shock hit him when he was completely unprepared. The pain it caused someone so reserved must have been awful; the anger it stirred up, unquenchable. So, a curse fell upon our poor, lovely little flowers, and they wilt.’”

“And you, Beatrice,” he asked, when she had ceased to speak, and there had been a silence afterwards: “how say you?”

“And you, Beatrice,” he asked, after she stopped speaking and there was a moment of silence, “what do you think?”

“Until within these few weeks I was afraid of you, and I believed that you would never, never, forgive.”

“Until just a few weeks ago, I was afraid of you, and I thought you would never, ever forgive me.”

“Until within these few weeks,” he repeated.  “Have you changed your opinion of me within these few weeks?”

“Until just a few weeks ago,” he repeated. “Have you changed your mind about me in these past few weeks?”

“Yes.”

“Yep.”

“For what reason?”

“Why?”

“I was getting some pieces of music in a shop in this town, when, to my terror, you p. 62came in.  As I veiled my face and stood in the dark end of the shop, I heard you explain that you wanted a musical instrument for a bedridden girl.  Your voice and manner were so softened, you showed such interest in its selection, you took it away yourself with so much tenderness of care and pleasure, that I knew you were a man with a most gentle heart.  O Mr. Jackson, Mr. Jackson, if you could have felt the refreshing rain of tears that followed for me!”

“I was picking up some music at a shop in this town when, to my horror, you p. 62 walked in. As I covered my face and stood in the dark corner of the shop, I heard you say that you needed a musical instrument for a girl who was bedridden. Your voice and demeanor were so softened, you showed such genuine interest in choosing the instrument, and you took it away yourself with such care and joy that I realized you had a very gentle heart. Oh Mr. Jackson, Mr. Jackson, if only you could have felt the refreshing rain of tears that followed for me!”

Was Phœbe playing at that moment, on her distant couch?  He seemed to hear her.

Was Phoebe playing at that moment on her distant couch? He thought he could hear her.

“I inquired in the shop where you lived, but could get no information.  As I had heard you say that you were going back by the next train (but you did not say where), I resolved to visit the station at about that time of day, as often as I could, between my lessons, on the chance of seeing you again.  I have been there very often, but saw you no more until to-day.  You were meditating as you walked the street, but the calm expression of your face emboldened me to send my child to you.  And when I saw you bend your head to speak tenderly to her, I prayed to God to forgive me for having ever brought a sorrow on it.  I now pray to you to forgive me, and to forgive my husband.  I was very young, he was young too, and in the ignorant hardihood of such a time of life we don’t know what we do to those p. 63who have undergone more discipline.  You generous man!  You good man!  So to raise me up and make nothing of my crime against you!”—for he would not see her on her knees, and soothed her as a kind father might have soothed an erring daughter—“thank you, bless you, thank you!”

“I asked around in the shop where you lived, but couldn’t get any information. Since I heard you mention that you were taking the next train back (but didn’t say where), I decided to visit the station at that time of day as often as I could between my lessons, hoping to see you again. I've been there many times, but didn’t see you again until today. You seemed deep in thought as you walked down the street, but the calm look on your face gave me the courage to send my child to you. And when I saw you lean down to speak gently to her, I prayed to God to forgive me for ever bringing sorrow upon her. Now, I ask you to forgive me, and to forgive my husband. I was very young, and he was young too, and with the reckless boldness typical of that stage in life, we don’t realize the impact we have on those who have endured more hardship. You generous man! You good man! For lifting me up and making my wrongdoing against you seem insignificant!”—for he wouldn’t let her stay on her knees, and he comforted her as a kind father would comfort a wayward daughter—“thank you, bless you, thank you!”

When he next spoke, it was after having drawn aside the window-curtain and looked out a while.  Then, he only said:

When he finally spoke again, it was after pulling back the window curtain and looking outside for a while. Then, he simply said:

“Is Polly asleep?”

"Is Polly sleeping?"

“Yes.  As I came in, I met her going away up-stairs, and put her to bed myself.”

“Yes. As I came in, I saw her heading upstairs, and I tucked her in myself.”

“Leave her with me for to-morrow, Beatrice, and write me your address on this leaf of my pocket-book.  In the evening I will bring her home to you—and to her father.”

“Leave her with me for tomorrow, Beatrice, and write your address on this leaf of my pocketbook. In the evening, I will bring her home to you—and to her father.”

* * * * *

Understood! Please provide the text you would like me to modernize.

“Hallo!” cried Polly, putting her saucy sunny face in at the door next morning when breakfast was ready: “I thought I was fetched last night?”

“Hey!” exclaimed Polly, poking her cheeky, cheerful face through the door the next morning when breakfast was ready. “I thought I was called last night?”

“So you were, Polly, but I asked leave to keep you here for the day, and to take you home in the evening.”

“So you were, Polly, but I asked if I could keep you here for the day and take you home in the evening.”

“Upon my word!” said Polly.  “You are very cool, ain’t you?”

“Honestly!” said Polly. “You are really bold, aren’t you?”

However, Polly seemed to think it a good idea, and added, “I suppose I must give you a kiss, though you are cool.”  The kiss given p. 64and taken, they sat down to breakfast in a highly conversational tone.

However, Polly seemed to think it was a good idea and added, “I guess I have to give you a kiss, even though you are cold.” The kiss was given p. 64and received, and they sat down to breakfast in a very chatty mood.

“Of course, you are going to amuse me?” said Polly.

“Of course, you’re going to entertain me?” said Polly.

“Oh, of course,” said Barbox Brothers.

“Oh, of course,” said Barbox Brothers.

In the pleasurable height of her anticipations, Polly found it indispensable to put down her piece of toast, cross one of her little fat knees over the other, and bring her little fat right hand down into her left hand with a business-like slap.  After this gathering of herself together, Polly, by that time, a mere heap of dimples, asked in a wheedling manner: “What are we going to do, you dear old thing?”

In the exciting peak of her expectations, Polly felt it was necessary to put down her piece of toast, cross one of her chunky little knees over the other, and bring her chubby right hand down into her left hand with a determined slap. After this little moment of gathering herself, Polly, now just a bundle of dimples, asked in a sweet voice, “What are we going to do, you dear old thing?”

“Why, I was thinking,” said Barbox Brothers, “—but are you fond of horses, Polly?”

“Why, I was thinking,” said Barbox Brothers, “—but do you like horses, Polly?”

“Ponies, I am,” said Polly, “especially when their tails are long.  But horses—n—no—too big, you know.”

“Ponies, I am,” said Polly, “especially when their tails are long. But horses—no—too big, you know.”

“Well,” pursued Barbox Brothers, in a spirit of grave mysterious confidence adapted to the importance of the consultation, “I did see yesterday, Polly, on the walls, pictures of two long-tailed ponies, speckled all over—”

“Well,” continued Barbox Brothers, in a tone of serious, mysterious confidence suited to the importance of the meeting, “I did see yesterday, Polly, on the walls, pictures of two long-tailed ponies, covered in spots—”

“No, no, no!” cried Polly, in an ecstatic desire to linger on the charming details.  “Not speckled all over!”

“Not at all, no!” Polly exclaimed, overwhelmed with a joyful wish to savor the delightful details. “Not covered everywhere!”

“Speckled all over.  Which ponies jump through hoops—”

“Covered in spots. Which ponies leap through hoops—”

p. 65“No, no, no!” cried Polly, as before.  “They never jump through hoops!”

p. 65“No, no, no!” shouted Polly, like before. “They never jump through hoops!”

“Yes, they do.  O I assure you, they do.  And eat pie in pinafores—”

“Yes, they do. Oh, I promise you, they really do. And they eat pie while wearing aprons—”

“Ponies eating pie in pinafores!” said Polly.  “What a story-teller you are, ain’t you?”

“Ponies eating pie in aprons!” said Polly. “What a storyteller you are, aren’t you?”

“Upon my honour.—And fire off guns.”

“On my honor.—And fire the guns.”

(Polly hardly seemed to see the force of the ponies resorting to fire-arms.)

(Polly barely seemed to understand why the ponies were turning to firearms.)

“And I was thinking,” pursued the exemplary Barbox, “that if you and I were to go to the Circus where these ponies are, it would do our constitutions good.”

“And I was thinking,” continued the exemplary Barbox, “that if you and I were to go to the Circus where these ponies are, it would be good for our health.”

“Does that mean, amuse us?” inquired Polly.  “What long words you do use, don’t you?”

“Does that mean, entertain us?” Polly asked. “What big words you use, don’t you?”

Apologetic for having wandered out of his depth, he replied: “That means, amuse us.  That is exactly what it means.  There are many other wonders besides the ponies, and we shall see them all.  Ladies and gentlemen in spangled dresses, and elephants and lions and tigers.”

Apologetic for having strayed beyond his understanding, he replied: “That means, entertain us. That’s exactly what it means. There are many other wonders besides the ponies, and we’ll see them all. Ladies and gentlemen in sequined outfits, along with elephants, lions, and tigers.”

Polly became observant of the teapot, with a curled-up nose indicating some uneasiness of mind.  “They never get out, of course,” she remarked as a mere truism.

Polly was keenly aware of the teapot, her nose wrinkled in apparent discomfort. “They never get out, obviously,” she said as if it were just a simple fact.

“The elephants and lions and tigers?  O dear no!”

“The elephants and lions and tigers? Oh no!”

“O dear no!” said Polly.  “And of p. 66course nobody’s afraid of the ponies shooting anybody.”

“O dear no!” said Polly. “And of p. 66course nobody’s afraid of the ponies hurting anyone.”

“Not the least in the world.”

“Not at all.”

“No, no, not the least in the world,” said Polly.

“No, no, not at all,” said Polly.

“I was also thinking,” proceeded Barbox, “that if we were to look in at the toy-shop, to choose a doll—”

“I was also thinking,” continued Barbox, “that if we stopped by the toy store to pick out a doll—”

“Not dressed!” cried Polly, with a clap of her hands.  “No, no, no, not dressed!”

“Not dressed!” exclaimed Polly, clapping her hands. “No, no, no, not dressed!”

“Full dressed.  Together with a house, and all things necessary for housekeeping—”

“Fully dressed. Along with a house and all the essentials for running a household—”

Polly gave a little scream, and seemed in danger of falling into a swoon of bliss.  “What a darling you are!” she languidly exclaimed, leaning back in her chair.  “Come and be hugged, or I must come and hug you!”

Polly let out a small scream and looked like she might faint from happiness. “You’re such a sweetheart!” she said dreamily, leaning back in her chair. “Come here for a hug, or I’ll come over and hug you!”

This resplendent programme was carried into execution with the utmost rigour of the law.  It being essential to make the purchase of the doll its first feature—or that lady would have lost the ponies—the toy-shop expedition took precedence.  Polly in the magic warehouse, with a doll as large as herself under each arm, and a neat assortment of some twenty more on view upon the counter, did indeed present a spectacle of indecision not quite compatible with unalloyed happiness, but the light cloud passed.  The lovely specimen oftenest chosen, oftenest rejected, and finally abided by, was of Circassian descent, possessing p. 67as much boldness of beauty as was reconcilable with extreme feebleness of mouth, and combining a sky-blue silk pelisse with rose-coloured satin trousers, and a black velvet hat: which this fair stranger to our northern shores would seem to have founded on the portraits of the late Duchess of Kent.  The name this distinguished foreigner brought with her from beneath the glowing skies of a sunny clime was (on Polly’s authority) Miss Melluka, and the costly nature of her outfit as a housekeeper, from the Barbox coffers, may be inferred from the two facts that her silver teaspoons were as large as her kitchen poker, and that the proportions of her watch exceeded those of her frying-pan.  Miss Melluka was graciously pleased to express her entire approbation of the Circus, and so was Polly; for the ponies were speckled, and brought down nobody when they fired, and the savagery of the wild beasts appeared to be mere smoke—which article, in fact, they did produce in large quantities from their insides.  The Barbox absorption in the general subject throughout the realisation of these delights was again a sight to see, nor was it less worthy to behold at dinner, when he drank to Miss Melluka, tied stiff in a chair opposite to Polly (the fair Circassian possessing an unbendable spine), and even induced the waiter to assist in carrying out with due decorum the prevailing glorious idea.  To wind up, there came the p. 68agreeable fever of getting Miss Melluka and all her wardrobe and rich possessions into a fly with Polly, to be taken home.  But by that time Polly had become unable to look upon such accumulated joys with waking eyes, and had withdrawn her consciousness into the wonderful Paradise of a child’s sleep.  “Sleep, Polly, sleep,” said Barbox Brothers, as her head dropped on his shoulder; “you shall not fall out of this bed, easily, at any rate!”

This amazing plan was carried out with strict adherence to the law. It was crucial to make the purchase of the doll its first task—or that lady would have lost the ponies—so the trip to the toy store came first. Polly, in the magical shop, with a doll as big as herself under each arm and a neat display of about twenty more on the counter, was indeed a sight of uncertainty that didn’t quite match pure happiness, but the fleeting doubt passed. The beautiful doll most often chosen, then often rejected, and finally settled on, was of Circassian origin, boasting as much striking beauty as was compatible with a very delicate mouth, and wearing a sky-blue silk coat with rose-colored satin pants and a black velvet hat: this lovely stranger from our northern lands seemed to have taken inspiration from portraits of the late Duchess of Kent. The name this distinguished foreigner brought with her from the sunny skies of a warm place was (according to Polly) Miss Melluka, and the expensive nature of her housekeeper outfit, from the Barbox funds, could be inferred from the two facts that her silver teaspoons were as big as her kitchen poker, and that her watch was larger than her frying pan. Miss Melluka graciously expressed her total approval of the Circus, and so did Polly; because the ponies were speckled and didn’t knock anyone down when they jumped, and the fierceness of the wild animals seemed to be just for show—which, in fact, they did produce in large amounts from their insides. The Barbox family's fascination with all this while they enjoyed these delights was quite a sight, and it was no less entertaining at dinner when he raised a toast to Miss Melluka, sitting stiffly in a chair across from Polly (the fair Circassian having an unbendable spine), and even got the waiter to help carry out the glorious idea with the right amount of decorum. To top it all off, there was the delightful rush of getting Miss Melluka and all her clothing and valuable possessions into a carriage with Polly for the trip home. But by that time, Polly had become unable to take in such a wealth of joy with her awake eyes and had slipped into the wonderful paradise of a child's sleep. “Sleep, Polly, sleep,” said Barbox Brothers, as her head fell onto his shoulder; “you won’t easily fall out of this bed, that’s for sure!”

What rustling piece of paper he took from his pocket, and carefully folded into the bosom of Polly’s frock, shall not be mentioned.  He said nothing about it, and nothing shall be said about it.  They drove to a modest suburb of the great ingenious town, and stopped at the forecourt of a small house.  “Do not wake the child,” said Barbox Brothers, softly, to the driver, “I will carry her in as she is.”

What rustling piece of paper he took from his pocket and carefully folded into the front of Polly’s dress won’t be mentioned. He said nothing about it, and nothing will be said about it. They drove to a quiet suburb of the big clever town and stopped in front of a small house. “Don’t wake the child,” Barbox Brothers said softly to the driver, “I’ll carry her in just like this.”

Greeting the light at the opened door which was held by Polly’s mother, Polly’s bearer passed on with mother and child into a ground-floor room.  There, stretched on a sofa, lay a sick man, sorely wasted, who covered his eyes with his emaciated hands.

Greeting the light from the open door held by Polly's mother, Polly's caregiver entered with mother and child into a ground-floor room. There, lying on a sofa, was a sick man, severely weakened, who covered his eyes with his thin hands.

“Tresham,” said Barbox, in a kindly voice, “I have brought you back your Polly, fast asleep.  Give me your hand, and tell me you are better.”

“Tresham,” Barbox said kindly, “I’ve brought your Polly back, and she’s fast asleep. Take my hand and let me know you’re feeling better.”

The sick man reached forth his right hand, and bowed his head over the hand into which p. 69it was taken and kissed it.  “Thank you, thank you!  I may say that I am well and happy.”

The sick man stretched out his right hand and bowed his head over the hand that was taken into p. 69and kissed it. “Thank you, thank you! I can honestly say that I’m well and happy.”

“That’s brave,” said Barbox.  “Tresham, I have a fancy—can you make room for me beside you here?”

"That’s brave," Barbox said. "Tresham, I have a thought—can you make some space for me next to you here?"

He sat down on the sofa as he said the words, cherishing the plump peachy cheek that lay uppermost on his shoulder.

He sat down on the couch as he spoke, enjoying the soft, peachy cheek resting on his shoulder.

“I have a fancy, Tresham (I am getting quite an old fellow now, you know, and old fellows may take fancies into their heads sometimes), to give up Polly, having found her, to no one but you.  Will you take her from me?”

“I have a notion, Tresham (I'm getting pretty old now, you know, and old guys can have ideas like this sometimes), to give up Polly, having found her, to no one but you. Will you take her from me?”

As the father held out his arms for the child, each of the two men looked steadily at the other.

As the father stretched out his arms for the child, both men stared at each other steadily.

“She is very dear to you, Tresham?”

“She means a lot to you, Tresham?”

“Unutterably dear.”

"Absolutely precious."

“God bless her!  It is not much, Polly,” he continued, turning his eyes upon her peaceful face as he apostrophised her, “it is not much, Polly, for a blind and sinful man to invoke a blessing on something so far better than himself as a little child is; but it would be much—much upon his cruel head, and much upon his guilty soul—if he could be so wicked as to invoke a curse.  He had better have a millstone round his neck, and be cast into the deepest sea.  Live and thrive, my pretty baby!”  Here he kissed her.  “Live p. 70and prosper, and become in time the mother of other little children, like the Angels who behold The Father’s face!”

“God bless her! It's not much, Polly,” he continued, looking at her peaceful face as he addressed her, “it's not much, Polly, for a blind and sinful man to ask for a blessing on something so much better than himself as a little child; but it would be a lot—so much on his cruel conscience, and so much on his guilty soul—if he could be so wicked as to ask for a curse. He’d be better off with a millstone around his neck, thrown into the deepest sea. Live and thrive, my sweet baby!” Here he kissed her. “Live and prosper, and one day become the mother of other little children, like the Angels who see The Father’s face!”

He kissed her again, gave her up gently to both her parents, and went out.

He kissed her again, handed her over gently to her parents, and left.

But he went not to Wales.  No, he never went to Wales.  He went straightway for another stroll about the town, and he looked in upon the people at their work, and at their play, here, there, everywhere, and where not.  For he was Barbox Brothers and Co. now, and had taken thousands of partners into the solitary firm.

But he didn't go to Wales. No, he never went to Wales. He headed out for another walk around the town and checked in on people as they worked and played, here, there, everywhere, and anywhere. Because he was now Barbox Brothers and Co., and had brought thousands of partners into the once solitary firm.

He had at length got back to his hotel room, and was standing before his fire refreshing himself with a glass of hot drink which he had stood upon the chimney-piece, when he heard the town clocks striking, and, referring to his watch, found the evening to have so slipped away, that they were striking twelve.  As he put up his watch again, his eyes met those of his reflection in the chimney-glass.

He finally returned to his hotel room and stood in front of the fire, enjoying a hot drink he had set on the mantelpiece, when he heard the town clocks chiming. Checking his watch, he realized the evening had gone by so quickly that they were ringing in midnight. As he put his watch away, he noticed his reflection in the mantel mirror.

“Why it’s your birthday already,” he said, smiling.  “You are looking very well.  I wish you many happy returns of the day.”

“Wow, it’s your birthday already,” he said, smiling. “You look great. I wish you lots of happy returns today.”

He had never before bestowed that wish upon himself.  “By Jupiter!” he discovered, “it alters the whole case of running away from one’s birthday!  It’s a thing to explain to Phœbe.  Besides, here is quite a long story to tell her, that has sprung out of the road p. 71with no story.  I’ll go back, instead of going on.  I’ll go back by my friend Lamps’s Up X presently.”

He had never wished for that before. “By Jupiter!” he realized, “it completely changes the idea of running away from your birthday! It’s something to share with Phœbe. Besides, I have quite a long story to tell her, which came from the road p. 71with no story. I’ll go back instead of continuing on. I’ll head back via my friend Lamps’s Up X soon.”

He went back to Mugby Junction, and in point of fact he established himself at Mugby Junction.  It was the convenient place to live in, for brightening Phœbe’s life.  It was the convenient place to live in, for having her taught music by Beatrice.  It was the convenient place to live in, for occasionally borrowing Polly.  It was the convenient place to live in, for being joined at will to all sorts of agreeable places and persons.  So, he became settled there, and, his house standing in an elevated situation, it is noteworthy of him in conclusion, as Polly herself might (not irreverently) have put it:

He returned to Mugby Junction and actually made it his home. It was the perfect place to live to brighten Phœbe’s life. It was a great spot for her to learn music from Beatrice. It was a convenient place for occasionally lending Polly. It was also an ideal place to easily connect with all kinds of pleasant places and people. So, he settled down there, and since his house was on high ground, it's worth mentioning in conclusion, as Polly herself might have said (without disrespect):

There was an Old Barbox who lived on a hill,
And if he ain’t gone, he lives there still.

There was an old Barbox who lived on a hill,
And if he isn't gone, he still lives there.

p. 72Here follows the substance of what was seen, heard, or otherwise picked up, by the Gentleman for Nowhere, in his careful study of the Junction.

p. 72Here’s what we saw, listened, or otherwise collected, by the Gentleman from Nowhere, during his detailed examination of the Junction.

MAIN LINE
THE BOY AT MUGBY

I am The Boy at Mugby.  That’s about what I am.

I am The Boy at Mugby. That’s pretty much who I am.

You don’t know what I mean?  What a pity!  But I think you do.  I think you must.  Look here.  I am the Boy at what is called The Refreshment Room at Mugby Junction, and what’s proudest boast is, that it never yet refreshed a mortal being.

You don't know what I mean? What a shame! But I think you do. I believe you must. Listen up. I am the Boy at what's known as The Refreshment Room at Mugby Junction, and my proudest claim is that it has yet to refresh a single soul.

Up in a corner of the Down Refreshment Room at Mugby Junction, in the height of twenty-seven cross draughts (I’ve often counted ’em while they brush the First Class hair twenty-seven ways), behind the bottles, among the glasses, bounded on the nor’-west by the p. 73beer, stood pretty far to the right of a metallic object that’s at times the tea-urn and at times the soup-tureen, according to the nature of the last twang imparted to its contents which are the same groundwork, fended off from the traveller by a barrier of stale sponge-cakes erected atop of the counter, and lastly exposed sideways to the glare of our Missis’s eye—you ask a Boy so sitiwated, next time you stop in a hurry at Mugby, for anything to drink; you take particular notice that he’ll try to seem not to hear you, that he’ll appear in a absent manner to survey the Line through a transparent medium composed of your head and body, and that he won’t serve you as long as you can possibly bear it.  That’s Me.

In a corner of the Down Refreshment Room at Mugby Junction, caught in twenty-seven cross drafts (I’ve often counted them while they style the First Class hair in twenty-seven different ways), behind the bottles and among the glasses, there stood a metallic object, sometimes a tea urn and sometimes a soup tureen, depending on the last flavor it held. This was all blocked from the travelers by a barrier of stale sponge cakes piled on the counter, and it was also exposed sideways to the glare of our Missis’s eye. Next time you stop in a hurry at Mugby, ask a Boy in that position for something to drink; you’ll notice he’ll try to act like he didn’t hear you, he’ll seem distracted as he gazes through a clear view formed by your head and body, and he won’t serve you for as long as he can manage. That’s me.

What a lark it is!  We are the Model Establishment, we are, at Mugby.  Other Refreshment Rooms send their imperfect young ladies up to be finished off by our Missis.  For some of the young ladies, when they’re new to the business, come into it mild!  Ah!  Our Missis, she soon takes that out of ’em.  Why, I originally come into the business meek myself.  But Our Missis she soon took that out of me.

What a delight it is! We are the Model Establishment here at Mugby. Other Refreshment Rooms send their inexperienced young ladies to be trained by our Missis. Some of the young ladies, when they first join, come in pretty timid! Ah! Our Missis quickly changes that. Honestly, I came into the business pretty humble myself. But our Missis soon took that out of me.

What a delightful lark it is!  I look upon us Refreshmenters as ockipying the only proudly independent footing on the Line.  There’s Papers for instance—my honourable friend if he will allow me to call him so—him as belongs to Smith’s bookstall.  Why he no more p. 74dares to be up to our Refreshmenting games, than he dares to jump atop of a locomotive with her steam at full pressure, and cut away upon her alone, driving himself, at limited-mail speed.  Papers, he’d get his head punched at every compartment, first, second and third, the whole length of a train, if he was to ventur to imitate my demeanour.  It’s the same with the porters, the same with the guards, the same with the ticket clerks, the same the whole way up to the secretary, traffic manager, or very chairman.  There ain’t a one among ’em on the nobly independent footing we are.  Did you ever catch one of them, when you wanted anything of him, making a system of surveying the Line through a transparent medium composed of your head and body?  I should hope not.

What a wonderful adventure this is! I see us Refreshmenters as the only ones proudly standing independently on the Line. Take Papers, for example—my esteemed friend, if he’ll let me call him that—who works at Smith’s bookstall. He wouldn't dare to join our Refreshmenting activities any more than he would jump on top of a locomotive with its steam at full pressure and take off by himself, driving at express speed. If Papers tried to act like me, he’d get his head knocked around in every compartment, first, second, and third, all the way down the train. It’s the same with the porters, the guards, the ticket clerks, and right up to the secretary, traffic manager, or even the chairman. None of them stand on the wonderfully independent ground that we do. Have you ever seen one of them when you needed something, surveying the Line through a clear view that’s just your head and body? I hope not.

You should see our Bandolining Room at Mugby Junction.  It’s led to, by the door behind the counter which you’ll notice usually stands ajar, and it’s the room where Our Missis and our young ladies Bandolines their hair.  You should see ’em at it, betwixt trains, Bandolining away, as if they was anointing themselves for the combat.  When you’re telegraphed, you should see their noses all a going up with scorn, as if it was a part of the working of the same Cooke and Wheatstone electrical machinery.  You should hear Our Missis give the word “Here comes the Beast to be Fed!” p. 75and then you should see ’em indignantly skipping across the Line, from the Up to the Down, or Wicer Warsaw, and begin to pitch the stale pastry into the plates, and chuck the sawdust sangwiches under the glass covers, and get out the—ha ha ha!—the Sherry—O my eye, my eye!—for your Refreshment.

You have to check out our Bandolining Room at Mugby Junction. It’s accessed through the door behind the counter, which you’ll usually find ajar, and it’s the room where Our Missis and our young ladies style their hair. You should see them at it, between trains, Bandolining away, as if they’re prepping for battle. When you get the telegraph, you should see their noses go up in scorn, as if it’s all part of the same Cooke and Wheatstone electrical machinery. You should hear Our Missis announce, “Here comes the Beast to be Fed!” and then you should see them indignantly skip across the Line, from the Up to the Down, or Wicer Warsaw, and start tossing the stale pastries onto the plates, and throwing the sawdust sandwiches under the glass covers, and pulling out the—ha ha ha!—the Sherry—Oh my goodness!—for your Refreshment.

It’s only in the Isle of the Brave and Land of the Free (by which of course I mean to say Britannia) that Refreshmenting is so effective, so ’olesome, so constitutional, a check upon the public.  There was a foreigner, which having politely, with his hat off, beseeched our young ladies and Our Missis for “a leetel gloss hoff prarndee,” and having had the Line surveyed through him by all and no other acknowledgment, was a proceeding at last to help himself, as seems to be the custom in his own country, when Our Missis with her hair almost a coming un-Bandolined with rage, and her eyes omitting sparks, flew at him, cotched the decanter out of his hand, and said: “Put it down!  I won’t allow that!”  The foreigner turned pale, stepped back with his arms stretched out in front of him, his hands clasped, and his shoulders riz, and exclaimed: “Ah!  Is it possible this!  That these disdaineous females and this ferocious old woman are placed here by the administration, not only to empoison the voyagers, but to affront them!  Great Heaven!  How arrives it?  The English p. 76people.  Or is he then a slave?  Or idiot?”  Another time, a merry wideawake American gent had tried the sawdust and spit it out, and had tried the Sherry and spit that out, and had tried in vain to sustain exhausted natur upon Butter-Scotch, and had been rather extra Bandolined and Line-surveyed through, when, as the bell was ringing and he paid Our Missis, he says, very loud and good-tempered: “I tell Yew what ’tis, ma’arm.  I la’af.  Theer!  I la’af.  I Dew.  I oughter ha’ seen most things, for I hail from the Onlimited side of the Atlantic Ocean, and I haive travelled right slick over the Limited, head on through Jee-rusalemm and the East, and likeways France and Italy, Europe Old World, and am now upon the track to the Chief Europian Village; but such an Institution as Yew, and Yewer young ladies, and Yewer fixin’s solid and liquid, afore the glorious Tarnal I never did see yet!  And if I hain’t found the eighth wonder of monarchical Creation, in finding Yew, and Yewer young ladies, and Yewer fixin’s solid and liquid, all as aforesaid, established in a country where the people air not absolute Loo-naticks, I am Extra Double Darned with a Nip and Frizzle to the innermostest grit!  Wheerfur—Theer!—I la’af!  I Dew, ma’arm.  I la’af!”  And so he went, stamping and shaking his sides, along the platform all the way to his own compartment.

It’s only in the Isle of the Brave and Land of the Free (by which I mean to say Britannia) that Refreshmenting is so effective, so wholesome, so constitutional, a check upon the public. There was a foreigner who, politely with his hat off, asked our young ladies and Our Missis for “a little gloss of brandy,” and after having the Line surveyed through him without any acknowledgment, he was about to help himself, as seems to be the custom in his own country, when Our Missis, nearly losing her mind with rage, and her eyes shooting sparks, went after him, grabbed the decanter out of his hand, and said: “Put it down! I won’t allow that!” The foreigner turned pale, stepped back with his arms stretched out in front of him, hands clasped, shoulders raised, and exclaimed: “Ah! Is this possible? That these disdainful females and this fierce old woman are placed here by the administration, not only to poison the travelers but to insult them! Great Heaven! How can this be? The English people. Or is he then a slave? Or an idiot?” Another time, a cheerful American guy tried the sawdust and spat it out, tried the Sherry and spat that out as well, and struggled to sustain himself with Butter-Scotch, and had been rather overly Bandolined and Line-surveyed when, as the bell was ringing and he paid Our Missis, he said very loudly and good-naturedly: “I tell you what it is, ma’am. I laugh. There! I laugh. I do. I ought to have seen most things, since I come from the Unlimited side of the Atlantic Ocean, and I have traveled right slick over to the Limited, straight through Jerusalem and the East, and likewise France and Italy, Old World Europe, and am now on my way to the Chief European Village; but such an establishment as you, and your young ladies, and your solid and liquid fixings, before the glorious Tarnation, I have never seen yet! And if I haven’t found the eighth wonder of monarchical Creation, in finding you, and your young ladies, and your solid and liquid fixings, all as previously stated, established in a country where the people are not absolute lunatics, I am Extra Double Darned to the innermost grit! Therefore—There!—I laugh! I do, ma’am. I laugh!” And so he went, stamping and shaking his sides all the way along the platform to his own compartment.

p. 77I think it was her standing up agin the Foreigner, as giv’ Our Missis the idea of going over to France, and droring a comparison betwixt Refreshmenting as followed among the frog-eaters, and Refreshmenting as triumphant in the Isle of the Brave and Land of the Free (by which of course I mean to say agin, Britannia).  Our young ladies, Miss Whiff, Miss Piff, and Mrs. Sniff, was unanimous opposed to her going; for, as they says to Our Missis one and all, it is well beknown to the hends of the herth as no other nation except Britain has a idea of anythink, but above all of business.  Why then should you tire yourself to prove what is aready proved?  Our Missis however (being a teazer at all pints) stood out grim obstinate, and got a return pass by South-Eastern Tidal, to go right through, if such should be her dispositions, to Marseilles.

p. 77I think it was her standing up against the Foreigner that gave Our Missis the idea of going over to France and drawing a comparison between the way things are enjoyed by the frog-eaters and the way they are celebrated in the Isle of the Brave and Land of the Free (by which I mean to say Britannia, of course). Our young ladies, Miss Whiff, Miss Piff, and Mrs. Sniff, were all unanimously against her going; since, as they told Our Missis, it is well known to the ends of the earth that no other country except Britain knows anything at all, especially about business. So why should you exhaust yourself proving what is already proven? However, Our Missis (being a bit stubborn at all points) remained determined and got a return ticket by South-Eastern Tidal, to go straight through, if that’s what she decided, to Marseilles.

Sniff is husband to Mrs. Sniff, and is a regular insignificant cove.  He looks arter the sawdust department in a back room, and is sometimes when we are very hard put to it let in behind the counter with a corkscrew; but never when it can be helped, his demeanour towards the public being disgusting servile.  How Mrs. Sniff ever come so far to lower herself as to marry him, I don’t know; but I suppose he does, and I should think he wished he didn’t, for he leads a awful life.  Mrs. Sniff couldn’t be much harder with him if he was public.  Similarly, p. 78Miss Whiff and Miss Piff; taking the tone of Mrs. Sniff, they shoulder Sniff about when he is let in with a corkscrew, and they whisk things out of his hands when in his servility he is a going to let the public have ’em, and they snap him up when in the crawling baseness of his spirit he is a going to answer a public question, and they drore more tears into his eyes than ever the mustard does which he all day long lays on to the sawdust.  (But it ain’t strong.)  Once, when Sniff had the repulsiveness to reach across to get the milk-pot to hand over for a baby, I see Our Missis in her rage catch him by both his shoulders and spin him out into the Bandolining Room.

Sniff is married to Mrs. Sniff and is just an ordinary nobody. He manages the sawdust department in a back room, and sometimes, when we’re really busy, he’s allowed behind the counter with a corkscrew; but that’s only when it can't be avoided because his attitude towards customers is annoyingly servile. I can’t figure out how Mrs. Sniff ended up marrying him; I guess he knows, and I bet he wishes he didn’t, because his life is miserable. Mrs. Sniff couldn’t be much harsher with him even if he were a public figure. Similarly, p. 78Miss Whiff and Miss Piff take after Mrs. Sniff, bossing Sniff around when he’s allowed in with a corkscrew, snatching things out of his hands whenever he’s about to hand them over to a customer, cutting him off when he’s trying to answer a customer’s question, and making him cry more than the mustard he uses all day long on the sawdust. (But it’s not that strong.) Once, when Sniff disgracefully reached over to grab the milk jug to give to a baby, I saw Our Missis, in her anger, grab him by both shoulders and throw him out into the Bandolining Room.

But Mrs. Sniff.  How different!  She’s the one!  She’s the one as you’ll notice to be always looking another way from you, when you look at her.  She’s the one with the small waist buckled in tight in front, and with the lace cuffs at her wrists, which she puts on the edge of the counter before her, and stands a smoothing while the public foams.  This smoothing the cuffs and looking another way while the public foams, is the last accomplishment taught to the young ladies as come to Mugby to be finished by Our Missis; and it’s always taught by Mrs. Sniff.

But Mrs. Sniff. How different! She’s the one! She’s the one who always looks away when you look at her. She’s the one with the tiny waist tightly cinched in front and the lace cuffs on her wrists, which she places on the edge of the counter before her and smooths while the customers get rowdy. This smoothing of the cuffs and looking away while the customers get rowdy is the final skill taught to the young ladies who come to Mugby to be polished by Our Missis; and it’s always taught by Mrs. Sniff.

When Our Missis went away upon her journey, Mrs. Sniff was left in charge.  She did hold the public in check most beautiful!  p. 79In all my time, I never see half so many cups of tea given without milk to people as wanted it with, nor half so many cups of tea with milk given to people as wanted it without.  When foaming ensued, Mrs. Sniff would say: “Then you’d better settle it among yourselves, and change with one another.”  It was a most highly delicious lark.  I enjoyed the Refreshmenting business more than ever, and was so glad I had took to it when young.

When Our Missis went off on her trip, Mrs. Sniff was in charge. She handled the customers like a pro! In all my time, I've never seen so many cups of tea served without milk to people who wanted it with milk, nor so many cups of tea with milk given to people who wanted it plain. When things got chaotic, Mrs. Sniff would say, “Then you’d better sort it out among yourselves and swap with each other.” It was a really entertaining situation. I enjoyed the Refreshmenting business more than ever and was so glad I had taken it up when I was younger. p. 79

Our Missis returned.  It got circulated among the young ladies, and it as it might be penetrated to me through the crevices of the Bandolining Room, that she had Orrors to reveal, if revelations so contemptible could be dignified with the name.  Agitation become awakened.  Excitement was up in the stirrups.  Expectation stood a tiptoe.  At length it was put forth that on our slackest evening in the week, and at our slackest time of that evening betwixt trains, Our Missis would give her views of foreign Refreshmenting, in the Bandolining Room.

Our Missis came back. Word spread among the young ladies, and I heard through the gaps in the Bandolining Room that she had some shocking things to share, if such trivial revelations could even be called that. Agitation stirred. Excitement was in the air. Everyone was on edge with anticipation. Finally, it was announced that on our quietest evening of the week, during the lull between trains, Our Missis would share her thoughts on foreign refreshments in the Bandolining Room.

It was arranged tasteful for the purpose.  The Bandolining table and glass was hid in a corner, a arm-chair was elevated on a packing-case for Our Missis’s ockypation, a table and a tumbler of water (no sherry in it, thankee) was placed beside it.  Two of the pupils, the season being autumn, and hollyhocks and daliahs being p. 80in, ornamented the wall with three devices in those flowers.  On one might be read, “May Albion never Learn;” on another, “Keep the Public Down;” on another, “Our Refreshmenting Charter.”  The whole had a beautiful appearance, with which the beauty of the sentiments corresponded.

It was arranged tastefully for the occasion. The Bandolining table and glass were tucked away in a corner, an armchair was propped up on a packing case for Our Missis’s use, and a table with a tumbler of water (no sherry in it, thank you) was placed beside it. Two of the students, with the season being autumn and hollyhocks and dahlias in bloom, decorated the wall with three designs featuring those flowers. One read, “May Albion never Learn;” another, “Keep the Public Down;” and the last, “Our Refreshmenting Charter.” The whole setup had a beautiful look that matched the beauty of the sentiments.

On Our Missis’s brow was wrote Severity, as she ascended the fatal platform.  (Not that that was anythink new.)  Miss Whiff and Miss Piff sat at her feet.  Three chairs from the Waiting Room might have been perceived by a average eye, in front of her, on which the pupils was accommodated.  Behind them, a very close observer might have discerned a Boy.  Myself.

On our lady’s brow was written Severity as she climbed the fateful platform. (Not that it was anything new.) Miss Whiff and Miss Piff sat at her feet. Three chairs from the Waiting Room could have been seen by an average eye in front of her, where the pupils were seated. Behind them, a very keen observer might have noticed a boy. Me.

“Where,” said Our Missis, glancing gloomily around, “is Sniff?”

“Where,” said Our Missis, looking around sadly, “is Sniff?”

“I thought it better,” answered Mrs. Sniff, “that he should not be let to come in.  He is such an Ass.”

“I thought it was better,” replied Mrs. Sniff, “that he shouldn’t be allowed to come in. He’s such an idiot.”

“No doubt,” assented Our Missis.  “But for that reason is it not desirable to improve his mind?”

“No doubt,” agreed Our Missis. “But for that reason, isn’t it important to broaden his mind?”

“O!  Nothing will ever improve him,” said Mrs. Sniff.

“O! Nothing will ever improve him,” said Mrs. Sniff.

“However,” pursued Our Missis, “call him in, Ezekiel.”

“However,” continued Our Missis, “bring him in, Ezekiel.”

I called him in.  The appearance of the low-minded cove was hailed with disapprobation p. 81from all sides, on account of his having brought his corkscrew with him.  He pleaded “the force of habit.”

I called him in. The sight of the dim-witted guy was met with disapproval from everyone around because he had brought his corkscrew along. He insisted it was just “the force of habit.” p. 81

“The force!” said Mrs. Sniff.  “Don’t let us have you talking about force, for Gracious sake.  There!  Do stand still where you are, with your back against the wall.”

“The force!” Mrs. Sniff exclaimed. “Please don’t start talking about force, for goodness’ sake. There! Just stand still where you are, with your back against the wall.”

He is a smiling piece of vacancy, and he smiled in the mean way in which he will even smile at the public if he gets a chance (language can say no meaner of him), and he stood upright near the door with the back of his head agin the wall, as if he was a waiting for somebody to come and measure his heighth for the Army.

He is a grinning empty shell, and he smiles in a way that makes it clear he would even smile at the public if he had the chance (language can't say anything worse about him), and he stood upright by the door with the back of his head against the wall, as if he was waiting for someone to come and measure his height for the Army.

“I should not enter, ladies,” says Our Missis, “on the revolting disclosures I am about to make, if it was not in the hope that they will cause you to be yet more implacable in the exercise of the power you wield in a constitutional country, and yet more devoted to the constitutional motto which I see before me;” it was behind her, but the words sounded better so; “‘May Albion never learn!’”

“I shouldn’t go into the shocking details I’m about to share, ladies,” says Our Missis, “if it weren’t for the hope that they will make you even more relentless in using the power you have in a constitutional country, and even more committed to the constitutional motto I see before me;” it was actually behind her, but it sounds better that way; “‘May Albion never learn!’”

Here the pupils as had made the motto, admired it, and cried, “Hear!  Hear!  Hear!”  Sniff, showing an inclination to join in chorus, got himself frowned down by every brow.

Here, the students who had created the motto admired it and shouted, “Hear! Hear! Hear!” Sniff, wanting to join in the chorus, was silenced by stern looks from everyone.

“The baseness of the French,” pursued Our Missis, “as displayed in the fawning nature of their Refreshmenting, equals, if not surpasses, p. 82anythink as was ever heard of the baseness of the celebrated Buonaparte.”

“The lowliness of the French,” continued Our Missis, “shown in the flattering manner of their Refreshments, is equal to, if not worse than, p. 82anything that has ever been said about the lowliness of the famous Buonaparte.”

Miss Whiff, Miss Piff and me, we drored a heavy breath, equal to saying, “We thought as much!”

Miss Whiff, Miss Piff, and I took a deep breath, as if to say, “We figured as much!”

Miss Whiff and Miss Piff seeming to object to my droring mine along with theirs, I drored another, to aggravate ’em.

Miss Whiff and Miss Piff seemed to have a problem with me drawing mine alongside theirs, so I drew another one to annoy them.

“Shall I be believed,” says Our Missis, with flashing eyes, “when I tell you that no sooner had I set my foot upon that treacherous shore—”

“Will anyone believe me,” says Our Missis, her eyes shining, “when I say that no sooner had I stepped onto that dangerous shore—”

Here Sniff, either busting out mad, or thinking aloud, says, in a low voice: “Feet.  Plural, you know.”

Here Sniff, either going a little crazy or thinking out loud, says in a low voice: “Feet. Plural, you know.”

The cowering that come upon him when he was spurned by all eyes, added to his being beneath contempt, was sufficient punishment for a cove so grovelling.  In the midst of a silence rendered more impressive by the turned-up female noses with which it was pervaded, Our Missis went on:

The fear that overwhelmed him when he was rejected by everyone, combined with his already miserable state, was more than enough punishment for a guy so pathetic. In the middle of a silence that was made even more intense by the scornful expressions on the women’s faces, Our Missis continued:

“Shall I be believed when I tell you that no sooner had I landed,” this word with a killing look at Sniff, “on that treacherous shore, than I was ushered into a Refreshment Room where there were, I do not exaggerate, actually eatable things to eat?”

“Will you believe me when I say that no sooner had I landed,” this said with a fierce look at Sniff, “on that dangerous shore, than I was taken into a Refreshment Room where there were, I’m not exaggerating, actually edible things to eat?”

A groan burst from the ladies.  I not only did myself the honour of jining, but also of lengthening it out.

A groan escaped from the ladies. I not only took the honor of joining, but also stretched it out.

“Where there were,” Our Missis added, p. 83“not only eatable things to eat, but also drinkable things to drink?”

“Where there were,” Our Missis added, p. 83“not just food to eat, but also drinks to enjoy?”

A murmur, swelling almost into a scream, ariz.  Miss Piff, trembling with indignation, called out: “Name!”

A murmur, rising almost into a scream, emerged. Miss Piff, shaking with anger, shouted: “Name!”

“I will name,” said Our Missis.  “There was roast fowls, hot and cold; there was smoking roast veal surrounded with browned potatoes; there was hot soup with (again I ask shall I be credited?) nothing bitter in it, and no flour to choke off the consumer; there was a variety of cold dishes set off with jelly; there was salad; there was—mark me!—fresh pastry, and that of a light construction; there was a luscious show of fruit.  There was bottles and decanters of sound small wine, of every size and adapted to every pocket; the same odious statement will apply to brandy; and these were set out upon the counter so that all could help themselves.”

“I will name,” said Our Missis. “There were roast chickens, hot and cold; there was steaming roast veal surrounded by crispy potatoes; there was hot soup with (again, can I get credit for this?) nothing bitter in it, and no flour to choke the eater; there was a variety of cold dishes arranged with jelly; there was salad; there was—listen to me!—fresh pastry, and it was light and flaky; there was an enticing display of fruit. There were bottles and decanters of good wine, in every size and suitable for every budget; the same unpleasant truth applies to the brandy; and these were laid out on the counter so that everyone could serve themselves.”

Our Missis’s lips so quivered, that Mrs. Sniff, though scarcely less convulsed than she were, got up and held the tumbler to them.

Our Missis’s lips quivered so much that Mrs. Sniff, who was barely less shaken than she was, stood up and held the glass to them.

“This,” proceeds Our Missis, “was my first unconstitutional experience.  Well would it have been, if it had been my last and worst.  But no.  As I proceeded further into that enslaved and ignorant land, its aspect became more hideous.  I need not explain to this assembly, the ingredients and formation of the British Refreshment sangwich?”

“This,” says Our Missis, “was my first experience with something that wasn’t right. It would have been better if it had been my last and worst. But no. As I went deeper into that oppressed and ignorant place, it became more horrifying. I don’t need to explain to you all the details and make-up of the British Refreshment sandwich?”

p. 84Universal laughter—except from Sniff, who, as sangwich-cutter, shook his head in a state of the utmost dejection as he stood with it agin the wall.

p. 84Everyone laughed—everyone except Sniff, who, as the sandwich maker, shook his head in complete disappointment while leaning against the wall.

“Well!” said Our Missis, with dilated nostrils.  “Take a fresh crisp long crusty penny loaf made of the whitest and best flower.  Cut it longwise through the middle.  Insert a fair and nicely fitting slice of ham.  Tie a smart piece of ribbon round the middle of the whole to bind it together.  Add at one end a neat wrapper of clean white paper by which to hold it.  And the universal French Refreshment sangwich busts on your disgusted vision.”

“Well!” said Our Missis, with flared nostrils. “Take a fresh, crisp, long, crusty penny loaf made of the finest white flour. Cut it lengthwise down the middle. Insert a nice, well-fitting slice of ham. Tie a stylish piece of ribbon around the middle to hold it together. Add a neat wrap of clean white paper at one end to hold it. And there you have the universal French Refreshment sandwich that will shock your senses.”

A cry of “Shame!” from all—except Sniff, which rubbed his stomach with a soothing hand.

A shout of “Shame!” from everyone—except Sniff, who rubbed his stomach with a comforting hand.

“I need not,” said Our Missis, “explain to this assembly, the usual formation and fitting of the British Refreshment Room?”

“I don’t need to,” said Our Missis, “explain to everyone here the typical setup and arrangement of the British Refreshment Room?”

No, no, and laughter.  Sniff agin shaking his head in low spirits agin the wall.

No, no, and laughter. Sniff again, shaking his head in low spirits against the wall.

“Well,” said Our Missis, “what would you say to a general decoration of everythink, to hangings (sometimes elegant), to easy velvet furniture, to abundance of little tables, to abundance of little seats, to brisk bright waiters, to great convenience, to a pervading cleanliness and tastefulness positively addressing the public and making the Beast thinking itself worth the pains?”

“Well,” said Our Missis, “what do you think about completely decorating everything, with some elegant drapes, soft velvet furniture, plenty of little tables, lots of cozy seating, cheerful waitstaff, great convenience, and an overall vibe of cleanliness and style that really appeals to the public and makes the place feel worth the effort?”

p. 85Contemptuous fury on the part of all the ladies.  Mrs. Sniff looking as if she wanted somebody to hold her, and everybody else looking as if they’d rayther not.

p. 85All the ladies were filled with contemptuous anger. Mrs. Sniff looked like she needed someone to comfort her, while everyone else seemed like they’d prefer not to be involved.

“Three times,” said our Missis, working herself into a truly terrimenjious state, “three times did I see these shamful things, only between the coast and Paris, and not counting either: at Hazebroucke, at Arras, at Amiens.  But worse remains.  Tell me, what would you call a person who should propose in England that there should be kept, say at our own model Mugby Junction, pretty baskets, each holding an assorted cold lunch and dessert for one, each at a certain fixed price, and each within a passenger’s power to take away, to empty in the carriage at perfect leisure, and to return at another station fifty or a hundred miles further on?”

“Three times,” said our Missis, working herself into a truly terrible state, “three times I saw these shameful things, just between the coast and Paris, not including: at Hazebroucke, at Arras, at Amiens. But worse is yet to come. Tell me, what would you call someone who suggested in England that we should have, say at our own model Mugby Junction, nice little baskets, each containing a cold lunch and dessert for one, each at a set price, and each with a passenger’s ability to take away, to enjoy in the carriage at their own pace, and to return at another station fifty or a hundred miles away?”

There was disagreement what such a person should be called.  Whether revolutionist, atheist, Bright (I said him), or Un-English.  Miss Piff screeched her shrill opinion last, in the words: “A malignant maniac!”

There was disagreement about what to call such a person. Whether revolutionary, atheist, Bright (I referred to him that way), or Un-English. Miss Piff shouted her opinion last, saying, “A malignant maniac!”

“I adopt,” says Our Missis, “the brand set upon such a person by the righteous indignation of my friend Miss Piff.  A malignant maniac.  Know then, that that malignant maniac has sprung from the congenial soil of France, and that his malignant madness was in unchecked action on this same part of my journey.”

“I adopt,” says Our Missis, “the label placed on such a person by my friend Miss Piff's just anger. A malicious maniac. Know this: that malicious maniac comes from the friendly ground of France, and that his malicious madness was on full display during this part of my journey.”

p. 86I noticed that Sniff was a rubbing his hands, and that Mrs. Sniff had got her eye upon him.  But I did not take more particular notice, owing to the excited state in which the young ladies was, and to feeling myself called upon to keep it up with a howl.

p. 86I saw that Sniff was rubbing his hands, and that Mrs. Sniff was watching him closely. But I didn't pay much attention to it because the young ladies were so excited, and I felt like I needed to join in with a howl.

“On my experience south of Paris,” said Our Missis, in a deep tone, “I will not expatiate.  Too loathsome were the task!  But fancy this.  Fancy a guard coming round, with the train at full speed, to inquire how many for dinner.  Fancy his telegraphing forward, the number of diners.  Fancy every one expected, and the table elegantly laid for the complete party.  Fancy a charming dinner, in a charming room, and the head-cook, concerned for the honour of every dish, superintending in his clean white jacket and cap.  Fancy the Beast travelling six hundred miles on end, very fast, and with great punctuality, yet being taught to expect all this to be done for it!”

“Based on my experience south of Paris,” said Our Missis in a serious tone, “I won’t go into detail. It would be too awful to discuss! But imagine this. Imagine a guard coming around, with the train speeding along, to ask how many are having dinner. Picture him sending a message ahead with the count of diners. Visualize everyone expected, and the table beautifully set for the whole group. Imagine a lovely dinner in a beautiful room, with the head chef, concerned for the quality of every dish, overseeing everything in his clean white jacket and hat. Picture the Beast traveling six hundred miles straight, very quickly, and with perfect punctuality, yet being conditioned to expect all this to be done for it!”

A spirited chorus of “The Beast!”

A lively shout of “The Beast!”

I noticed that Sniff was agin a rubbing his stomach with a soothing hand, and that he had drored up one leg.  But agin I didn’t take particular notice, looking on myself as called upon to stimilate public feeling.  It being a lark besides.

I saw that Sniff was again rubbing his stomach with a calming hand, and he had drawn up one leg. But again, I didn’t pay much attention, thinking I needed to stir up public sentiment. It was just for fun anyway.

“Putting everything together,” said Our Missis, “French Refreshmenting comes to this, and O it comes to a nice total!  First: p. 87eatable things to eat, and drinkable things to drink.”

“Putting everything together,” said Our Missis, “French Refreshment comes down to this, and oh, it adds up to a nice total! First: p. 87things you can eat, and drinks you can enjoy.”

A groan from the young ladies, kep’ up by me.

A groan from the young ladies, kept up by me.

“Second: convenience, and even elegance.”

“Second: convenience and elegance.”

Another groan from the young ladies, kep’ up by me.

Another groan from the young women, continued by me.

“Third: moderate charges.”

“Third: reasonable fees.”

This time, a groan from me, kep’ up by the young ladies.

This time, I groaned, joined in by the young ladies.

“Fourth:—and here,” says Our Missis, “I claim your angriest sympathy—attention, common civility, nay, even politeness!”

“Fourth:—and here,” says Our Missis, “I ask for your deepest sympathy—attention, basic respect, and even politeness!”

Me and the young ladies regularly raging mad all together.

Me and the young ladies often getting really angry together.

“And I cannot in conclusion,” says Our Missis, with her spitefullest sneer, “give you a completer pictur of that despicable nation (after what I have related), than assuring you that they wouldn’t bear our constitutional ways and noble independence at Mugby Junction, for a single month, and that they would turn us to the right-about and put another system in our places, as soon as look at us; perhaps sooner, for I do not believe they have the good taste to care to look at us twice.”

“And I can’t wrap this up,” says Our Missis, with her most spiteful sneer, “by giving you a clearer picture of that despicable nation (after what I’ve shared) than to assure you that they wouldn’t tolerate our constitutional ways and noble independence at Mugby Junction for even a month. They’d send us packing and replace us with another system as quickly as they could look at us—maybe even quicker, because I doubt they have the good taste to want to look at us twice.”

The swelling tumult was arrested in its rise.  Sniff, bore away by his servile disposition, had drored up his leg with a higher and a higher relish, and was now discovered to be waving his corkscrew over his head.  It was at this p. 88moment that Mrs. Sniff, who had kep’ her eye upon him like the fabled obelisk, descended on her victim.  Our Missis followed them both out, and cries was heard in the sawdust department.

The rising chaos was suddenly stopped. Sniff, influenced by his submissive nature, had enjoyed himself more and more and was now seen waving his corkscrew above his head. It was at this p. 88moment that Mrs. Sniff, who had been watching him closely like the mythical obelisk, swooped down on him. Our Missis followed them both outside, and screams could be heard in the sawdust section.

You come into the Down Refreshment Room, at the Junction, making believe you don’t know me, and I’ll pint you out with my right thumb over my shoulder which is Our Missis, and which is Miss Whiff; and which is Miss Piff; and which is Mrs. Sniff.  But you won’t get a chance to see Sniff, because he disappeared that night.  Whether he perished, tore to pieces, I cannot say; but his corkscrew alone remains, to bear witness to the servility of his disposition.

You walk into the Down Refreshment Room at the Junction, pretending you don’t know me, and I’ll point you out with my right thumb over my shoulder—there’s Our Missis, and then Miss Whiff; then Miss Piff; and finally Mrs. Sniff. But you won’t have a chance to see Sniff because he vanished that night. Whether he died or was torn apart, I can’t say; but only his corkscrew is left to testify to how servile he was.

p. 89No. 1 BRANCH LINE
THE SIGNAL-MAN

“Halloa!  Below there!”

"Hello! Down there!"

When he heard a voice thus calling to him, he was standing at the door of his box, with a flag in his hand, furled round its short pole.  One would have thought, considering the nature of the ground, that he could not have doubted from what quarter the voice came; but, instead of looking up to where I stood on the top of the steep cutting nearly over his head, he turned himself about and looked down the Line.  There was something remarkable in his manner of doing so, though I could not have said, for my life, what.  But, I know it was remarkable enough to attract my notice, even though his figure was foreshortened and shadowed, down in the deep trench, and mine was high above him, so steeped in the glow of an angry sunset that I had shaded my eyes with my hand before I saw him at all.

When he heard a voice calling out to him, he was standing at the door of his box, holding a flag wrapped around its short pole. One would think that, given the nature of the ground, he wouldn't have doubted where the voice came from; but instead of looking up to where I was standing at the top of the steep cutting, nearly above him, he turned and looked down the Line. There was something notable about how he did this, though I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. But I know it was striking enough to catch my attention, even though his figure appeared compressed and shadowy down in the deep trench, while mine was high above him, bathed in the glow of an angry sunset, causing me to shade my eyes with my hand before I finally spotted him.

“Halloa!  Below!”

“Hey! Down there!”

p. 90From looking down the Line, he turned himself about again, and, raising his eyes, saw my figure high above him.

p. 90After glancing down the Line, he turned around and, lifting his gaze, spotted my figure towering above him.

“Is there any path by which I can come down and speak to you?”

“Is there any way for me to come down and talk to you?”

He looked up at me without replying, and I looked down at him without pressing him too soon with a repetition of my idle question.  Just then, there came a vague vibration in the earth and air, quickly changing into a violent pulsation, and an oncoming rush that caused me to start back, as though it had force to draw me down.  When such vapour as rose to my height from this rapid train, had passed me and was skimming away over the landscape, I looked down again and saw him re-furling the flag he had shown while the train went by.

He looked up at me without saying anything, and I looked down at him without pushing him too hard with the same pointless question. Just then, I felt a faint vibration in the ground and air, quickly turning into a strong pulse, and a rush that made me step back, as if it had the power to pull me down. When the mist that rose to my level from this fast-moving train had passed and was moving away over the landscape, I looked down again and saw him rolling up the flag he had displayed while the train went by.

I repeated my inquiry.  After a pause, during which he seemed to regard me with fixed attention, he motioned with his rolled-up flag towards a point on my level, some two or three hundred yards distant.  I called down to him, “All right!” and made for that point.  There, by dint of looking closely about me, I found a rough zig-zag descending path notched out: which I followed.

I asked my question again. After a moment, while he stared at me intently, he gestured with his rolled-up flag toward a spot at my level, about two or three hundred yards away. I shouted down to him, “Got it!” and headed toward that spot. There, by carefully examining my surroundings, I found a rugged zig-zag path carved out, which I followed.

The cutting was extremely deep, and unusually precipitate.  It was made through a clammy stone that became oozier and wetter as I went down.  For these reasons, I found the way long enough to give me time to recall p. 91a singular air of reluctance or compulsion with which he had pointed out the path.

The cut was really deep and unexpectedly steep. It was made through a damp stone that got sloppier and wetter as I descended. Because of this, I found the journey long enough to remember the odd mix of hesitation and urgency with which he had indicated the way.

When I came down low enough upon the zig-zag descent, to see him again, I saw that he was standing between the rails on the way by which the train had lately passed, in an attitude as if he were waiting for me to appear.  He had his left hand at his chin, and that left elbow rested on his right hand crossed over his breast.  His attitude was one of such expectation and watchfulness, that I stopped a moment, wondering at it.

When I came down far enough on the winding path to see him again, I noticed he was standing between the tracks where the train had just passed, looking like he was waiting for me to show up. He had his left hand on his chin, with that elbow resting on his right hand crossed over his chest. His posture showed such anticipation and vigilance that I paused for a moment, intrigued by it.

I resumed my downward way, and, stepping out upon the level of the railroad and drawing nearer to him, saw that he was a dark sallow man, with a dark beard and rather heavy eyebrows.  His post was in as solitary and dismal a place as ever I saw.  On either side, a dripping-wet wall of jagged stone, excluding all view but a strip of sky; the perspective one way, only a crooked prolongation of this great dungeon; the shorter perspective in the other direction, terminating in a gloomy red light, and the gloomier entrance to a black tunnel, in whose massive architecture there was a barbarous, depressing, and forbidding air.  So little sunlight ever found its way to this spot, that it had an earthy deadly smell; and so much cold wind rushed through it, that it struck chill to me, as if I had left the natural world.

I continued walking downwards, and as I stepped onto the level of the railroad and got closer to him, I noticed he was a dark, sallow man with a dark beard and heavy eyebrows. His post was in one of the loneliest and most depressing places I had ever seen. On either side were dripping wet walls of jagged stone, blocking any view except a narrow strip of sky. One way stretched a crooked extension of this huge dungeon; in the other direction, it ended in a gloomy red light and the even gloomier entrance to a black tunnel, which had a heavy, grim, and unwelcoming atmosphere. So little sunlight ever reached this place that it had a damp, lifeless smell, and so much cold wind rushed through that it hit me like I had stepped out of the natural world.

p. 92Before he stirred, I was near enough to him to have touched him.  Not even then removing his eyes from mine, he stepped back one step, and lifted his hand.

p. 92Before he moved, I was close enough to touch him. Without breaking eye contact, he took a step back and raised his hand.

This was a lonesome post to occupy (I said), and it had riveted my attention when I looked down from up yonder.  A visitor was a rarity, I should suppose; not an unwelcome rarity, I hoped?  In me, he merely saw a man who had been shut up within narrow limits all his life, and who, being at last set free, had a newly-awakened interest in these great works.  To such purpose I spoke to him; but I am far from sure of the terms I used, for, besides that I am not happy in opening any conversation, there was something in the man that daunted me.

This was a lonely job to have, I thought, and it really caught my attention when I looked down from up there. A visitor was pretty rare, I assumed; hopefully not an unwelcome rarity? To him, I was just a guy who had been cooped up in a small space my whole life and who, now that I was finally free, had a new interest in these impressive works. I spoke to him with that in mind, but I’m not sure about the words I chose because, besides not being great at starting conversations, there was something about him that intimidated me.

He directed a most curious look towards the red light near the tunnel’s mouth, and looked all about it, as if something were missing from it, and then looked at me.

He shot a really curious glance at the red light near the entrance of the tunnel, scanning the area as if something was off, and then turned to me.

That light was part of his charge?  Was it not?

That light was part of his responsibility, right?

He answered in a low voice: “Don’t you know it is?”

He replied quietly, "Don't you know it is?"

The monstrous thought came into my mind as I perused the fixed eyes and the saturnine face, that this was a spirit, not a man.  I have speculated since, whether there may have been infection in his mind.

The horrifying thought crossed my mind as I looked at the unblinking eyes and the gloomy face, that this was a spirit, not a person. I've wondered since then if there might have been a contagion in his mind.

In my turn, I stepped back.  But in making p. 93the action, I detected in his eyes some latent fear of me.  This put the monstrous thought to flight.

In my turn, I stepped back. But in doing so, I noticed a hint of fear in his eyes. This pushed the terrifying thought away.

“You look at me,” I said, forcing a smile, “as if you had a dread of me.”

"You look at me," I said, forcing a smile, "like you’re afraid of me."

“I was doubtful,” he returned, “whether I had seen you before.”

“I wasn't sure,” he replied, “if I had seen you before.”

“Where?”

"Where at?"

He pointed to the red light he had looked at.

He pointed to the red light he had been looking at.

“There?” I said.

"There?" I said.

Intently watchful of me, he replied (but without sound), “Yes.”

Intently watching me, he replied (but silently), “Yes.”

“My good fellow, what should I do there?  However, be that as it may, I never was there, you may swear.”

“My good man, what could I possibly do there? Anyway, I’ve never been there, I promise you.”

“I think I may,” he rejoined.  “Yes.  I am sure I may.”

“I think I might,” he replied. “Yes. I’m sure I can.”

His manner cleared, like my own.  He replied to my remarks with readiness, and in well-chosen words.  Had he much to do there?  Yes; that was to say, he had enough responsibility to bear; but exactness and watchfulness were what was required of him, and of actual work—manual labour—he had next to none.  To change that signal, to trim those lights, and to turn this iron handle now and then, was all he had to do under that head.  Regarding those many long and lonely hours of which I seemed to make so much, he could only say that the routine of his life had shaped itself into that form, and he had grown used to it.  He had p. 94taught himself a language down here—if only to know it by sight, and to have formed his own crude ideas of its pronunciation, could be called learning it.  He had also worked at fractions and decimals, and tried a little algebra; but he was, and had been as a boy, a poor hand at figures.  Was it necessary for him when on duty, always to remain in that channel of damp air, and could he never rise into the sunshine from between those high stone walls?  Why, that depended upon times and circumstances.  Under some conditions there would be less upon the Line than under others, and the same held good as to certain hours of the day and night.  In bright weather, he did choose occasions for getting a little above these lower shadows; but, being at all times liable to be called by his electric bell, and at such times listening for it with redoubled anxiety, the relief was less than I would suppose.

His demeanor cleared up, just like mine. He responded to my comments readily and with well-chosen words. Did he have a lot to do there? Yes, that means he had enough responsibility to handle, but what he really needed was precision and vigilance; he had almost no actual physical work to do. Changing that signal, adjusting those lights, and occasionally turning that iron handle was all he had to do in that regard. As for those many long and lonely hours that I seemed to emphasize so much, he could only say that his routine had shaped itself into that pattern, and he had gotten used to it. He had taught himself a bit of a language down here—just to recognize it visually and come up with his own rough ideas about its pronunciation, which counts as learning it, I guess. He had also worked on fractions and decimals and dabbled in some algebra, but he had always been, since he was a boy, not great with numbers. Was it necessary for him to always stay in that channel of damp air while on duty, and could he never get up into the sunlight beyond those high stone walls? Well, that depended on times and circumstances. Under some conditions, there would be less to manage on the Line than at other times, and the same went for certain hours of the day and night. In nice weather, he did take opportunities to escape the lower shadows a bit, but since he was always at risk of being called by his electric bell, and at those moments listening for it with heightened anxiety, the relief was less than I would have thought.

He took me into his box, where there was a fire, a desk for an official book in which he had to make certain entries, a telegraphic instrument with its dial face and needles, and the little bell of which he had spoken.  On my trusting that he would excuse the remark that he had been well educated, and (I hoped I might say without offence), perhaps educated above that station, he observed that instances of slight incongruity in such-wise would rarely be found wanting among large bodies of men; p. 95that he had heard it was so in workhouses, in the police force, even in that last desperate resource, the army; and that he knew it was so, more or less, in any great railway staff.  He had been, when young (if I could believe it, sitting in that hut; he scarcely could), a student of natural philosophy, and had attended lectures; but he had run wild, misused his opportunities, gone down, and never risen again.  He had no complaint to offer about that.  He had made his bed, and he lay upon it.  It was far too late to make another.

He took me into his room, where there was a fire, a desk for an official book where he had to make certain entries, a telegraphic instrument with its dial and needles, and the little bell he mentioned. When I trusted he would accept that I thought he was well-educated, and (I hoped I wasn't being rude) perhaps overqualified for his position, he pointed out that you'd often find examples of such mismatches among large groups of people; that he had heard it was common in workhouses, the police force, and even in that last resort, the army; and that he knew it was the case, to some extent, in any major railway staff. He told me he had been, when he was young (if I could believe it, sitting in that hut; he could hardly believe it), a student of natural philosophy and had attended lectures, but he had wasted his chances, gone off track, fallen, and never gotten back up. He didn't have any complaints about that. He had made his choices, and he was living with them. It was far too late to start over.

All that I have here condensed, he said in a quiet manner, with his grave dark regards divided between me and the fire.  He threw in the word “Sir,” from time to time, and especially when he referred to his youth: as though to request me to understand that he claimed to be nothing but what I found him.  He was several times interrupted by the little bell, and had to read off messages, and send replies.  Once, he had to stand without the door, and display a flag as a train passed, and make some verbal communication to the driver.  In the discharge of his duties I observed him to be remarkably exact and vigilant, breaking off his discourse at a syllable, and remaining silent until what he had to do was done.

All that I have summed up here, he said quietly, with his serious dark eyes shifting between me and the fire. He occasionally threw in the word “Sir,” particularly when he talked about his younger days, as if to remind me that he was nothing more than what I saw in him. He was interrupted several times by a small bell and had to read messages and send replies. At one point, he had to stand outside the door, wave a flag as a train went by, and communicate something to the driver. While doing his job, I noticed he was very precise and attentive, stopping his conversation mid-sentence and remaining silent until he finished what he needed to do.

In a word, I should have set this man down as one of the safest of men to be employed in that capacity, but for the circumstance that p. 96while he was speaking to me he twice broke off with a fallen colour, turned his face towards the little bell when it did not ring, opened the door of the hut (which was kept shut to exclude the unhealthy damp), and looked out towards the red light near the mouth of the tunnel.  On both of those occasions, he came back to the fire with the inexplicable air upon him which I had remarked, without being able to define, when we were so far asunder.

In short, I would have considered this man one of the most reliable people to be hired for the job, if not for the fact that p. 96while he was talking to me, he twice paused with a pale face, looked toward the little bell when it didn’t ring, opened the door of the hut (which was kept shut to keep out the unhealthy dampness), and glanced toward the red light near the tunnel entrance. Each time, he returned to the fire with that strange expression I had noticed before, unable to explain, when we were so far apart.

Said I when I rose to leave him: “You almost make me think that I have met with a contented man.”

Said I when I got up to leave him: “You almost make me think that I’ve met a happy man.”

(I am afraid I must acknowledge that I said it to lead him on).

(I’m afraid I have to admit that I said it to encourage him.)

“I believe I used to be so,” he rejoined, in the low voice in which he had first spoken; “but I am troubled, sir, I am troubled.”

“I think I used to be like that,” he replied, in the quiet voice he had used at the start; “but I’m worried, sir, I’m really worried.”

He would have recalled the words if he could.  He had said them, however, and I took them up quickly.

He would have remembered the words if he could. He had said them, though, and I grabbed onto them quickly.

“With what?  What is your trouble?”

“With what? What’s wrong?”

“It is very difficult to impart, sir.  It is very, very, difficult to speak of.  If ever you make me another visit, I will try to tell you.”

“It’s really hard to explain, sir. It’s really, really tough to talk about. If you come to visit me again, I’ll try to share it with you.”

“But I expressly intend to make you another visit.  Say, when shall it be?”

“But I definitely plan to come visit you again. So, when should that be?”

“I go off early in the morning, and I shall be on again at ten to-morrow night, sir.”

“I leave early in the morning, and I’ll be back on at ten tomorrow night, sir.”

“I will come at eleven.”

"I'll be there at eleven."

He thanked me, and went out at the door p. 97with me.  “I’ll show my white light, sir,” he said, in his peculiar low voice, “till you have found the way up.  When you have found it, don’t call out!  And when you are at the top, don’t call out!”

He thanked me and walked out the door p. 97with me. “I’ll guide you with my white light, sir,” he said in his unique low voice, “until you find your way up. Once you’ve found it, don’t shout! And when you reach the top, don’t shout!”

His manner seemed to make the place strike colder to me, but I said no more than “Very well.”

His demeanor made the place feel even colder to me, but I only replied, “Okay.”

“And when you come down to-morrow night, don’t call out!  Let me ask you a parting question.  What made you cry ‘Halloa!  Below there!’ to-night?”

“And when you come down tomorrow night, don’t shout! Let me ask you one last question. What made you yell ‘Hey! Down here!’ tonight?”

“Heaven knows,” said I.  “I cried something to that effect—”

“Heaven knows,” I said. “I shouted something like that—”

“Not to that effect, sir.  Those were the very words.  I know them well.”

“Not exactly, sir. Those were the exact words. I know them well.”

“Admit those were the very words.  I said them, no doubt, because I saw you below.”

“Admit those were the exact words. I said them for sure because I saw you down there.”

“For no other reason?”

"Is there no other reason?"

“What other reason could I possibly have!”

"What other reason could I possibly have?"

“You had no feeling that they were conveyed to you in any supernatural way?”

“You didn’t feel like they came to you in any supernatural way?”

“No.”

“No.”

He wished me good night, and held up his light.  I walked by the side of the down Line of rails (with a very disagreeable sensation of a train coming behind me), until I found the path.  It was easier to mount than to descend, and I got back to my inn without any adventure.

He said good night and raised his light. I walked alongside the lower set of tracks (feeling very uneasy about a train approaching from behind), until I found the path. It was easier to climb than to go down, and I returned to my inn without any trouble.

Punctual to my appointment, I placed my p. 98foot on the first notch of the zig-zag next night, as the distant clocks were striking eleven.  He was waiting for me at the bottom, with his white light on.  “I have not called out,” I said, when we came close together; “may I speak now?”  “By all means, sir.”  “Good night then, and here’s my hand.”  “Good night, sir, and here’s mine.”  With that, we walked side by side to his box, entered it, closed the door, and sat down by the fire.

Punctual for my appointment, I placed my p. 98foot on the first notch of the zig-zag the next night, as the distant clocks struck eleven. He was waiting for me at the bottom, with his white light on. “I haven’t called out,” I said as we got closer; “can I speak now?” “Of course, sir.” “Good night then, and here’s my hand.” “Good night, sir, and here’s mine.” With that, we walked side by side to his box, entered it, closed the door, and sat down by the fire.

“I have made up my mind, sir,” he began, bending forward as soon as we were seated, and speaking in a tone but a little above a whisper, “that you shall not have to ask me twice what troubles me.  I took you for some one else yesterday evening.  That troubles me.”

“I’ve made up my mind, sir,” he began, leaning forward as soon as we were seated and speaking in a tone just above a whisper, “that you won’t have to ask me twice about what’s bothering me. I mistook you for someone else yesterday evening. That’s what’s troubling me.”

“That mistake?”

"That error?"

“No.  That some one else.”

“No. That someone else.”

“Who is it?”

"Who's there?"

“I don’t know.”

“I don’t know.”

“Like me?”

“Do you like me?”

“I don’t know.  I never saw the face.  The left arm is across the face, and the right arm is waved.  Violently waved.  This way.”

“I don’t know. I never saw the face. The left arm is across the face, and the right arm is waved. Violently waved. This way.”

I followed his action with my eyes, and it was the action of an arm gesticulating with the utmost passion and vehemence: “For God’s sake clear the way!”

I watched his movement closely; it was a hand waving with intense passion and urgency: “For God’s sake, get out of the way!”

“One moonlight night,” said the man, “I was sitting here, when I heard a voice cry p. 99‘Halloa!  Below there!’ I started up, looked from that door, and saw this Some one else standing by the red light near the tunnel, waving as I just now showed you.  The voice seemed hoarse with shouting, and it cried, ‘Look out!  Look out!’ And then again ‘Halloa!  Below there!  Look out!’ I caught up my lamp, turned it on red, and ran towards the figure, calling, ‘What’s wrong?  What has happened?  Where?’  It stood just outside the blackness of the tunnel.  I advanced so close upon it that I wondered at its keeping the sleeve across its eyes.  I ran right up at it, and had my hand stretched out to pull the sleeve away, when it was gone.”

“One moonlit night,” said the man, “I was sitting here when I heard a voice shout, ‘Hey! Down there!’ I jumped up, looked out from that door, and saw someone standing by the red light near the tunnel, waving like I just showed you. The voice sounded hoarse from yelling, and it shouted, ‘Watch out! Watch out!’ And then again, ‘Hey! Down there! Watch out!’ I grabbed my lamp, turned it to red, and ran toward the figure, asking, ‘What’s wrong? What happened? Where?’ It was just outside the darkness of the tunnel. I got so close that I was surprised it was keeping its sleeve over its eyes. I rushed right up to it and had my hand out to pull the sleeve away when it suddenly disappeared.”

“Into the tunnel,” said I.

“Into the tunnel,” I said.

“No.  I ran on, into the tunnel, five hundred yards.  I stopped and held my lamp above my head, and saw the figures of the measured distance, and saw the wet stains stealing down the walls and trickling through the arch.  I ran out again, faster than I had run in (for I had a mortal abhorrence of the place upon me), and I looked all round the red light with my own red light, and I went up the iron ladder to the gallery atop of it, and I came down again, and ran back here.  I telegraphed both ways: ‘An alarm has been given.  Is anything wrong?’  The answer came back, both ways: ‘All well.’”

“No. I ran on into the tunnel for five hundred yards. I stopped and lifted my lamp above my head, seeing the marked distance and the wet stains creeping down the walls and dripping through the arch. I ran out again, faster than I had run in (I felt a deep dread of the place), and I looked all around the red light with my own red light. I climbed up the iron ladder to the top gallery, then came back down and rushed back here. I sent a message in both directions: ‘An alarm has been raised. Is anything wrong?’ The response came back, in both directions: ‘All good.’”

Resisting the slow touch of a frozen finger p. 100tracing out my spine, I showed him how that this figure must be a deception of his sense of sight, and how that figures, originating in disease of the delicate nerves that minister to the functions of the eye, were known to have often troubled patients, some of whom had become conscious of the nature of their affliction, and had even proved it by experiments upon themselves.  “As to an imaginary cry,” said I, “do but listen for a moment to the wind in this unnatural valley while we speak so low, and to the wild harp it makes of the telegraph wires!”

Resisting the slow touch of a frozen finger p. 100 tracing my spine, I explained to him how this figure must be a trick of his vision, and how figures, arising from issues with the delicate nerves that affect the eye's functions, had often disturbed patients. Some individuals had even become aware of their condition and had proven it through self-experiments. “As for an imaginary cry,” I said, “just listen for a moment to the wind in this strange valley while we speak so softly, and to the wild melody it creates with the telegraph wires!”

That was all very well, he returned, after we had sat listening for a while, and he ought to know something of the wind and the wires, he who so often passed long winter nights there, alone and watching.  But he would beg to remark that he had not finished.

That was all good, he replied, after we had sat listening for a while, and he should know a thing or two about the wind and the wires, since he often spent long winter nights there, alone and observing. But he would like to point out that he hadn’t finished.

I asked his pardon, and he slowly added these words, touching my arm:

I apologized to him, and he slowly added these words, touching my arm:

“Within six hours after the Appearance, the memorable accident on this Line happened, and within ten hours the dead and wounded were brought along through the tunnel over the spot where the figure had stood.”

“Within six hours after the Appearance, the memorable accident on this Line occurred, and within ten hours the dead and wounded were carried through the tunnel over the place where the figure had stood.”

A disagreeable shudder crept over me, but I did my best against it.  It was not to be denied, I rejoined, that this was a remarkable coincidence, calculated deeply to impress his mind.  But, it was unquestionable that p. 101remarkable coincidences did continually occur, and they must be taken into account in dealing with such a subject.  Though to be sure I must admit, I added (for I thought I saw that he was going to bring the objection to bear upon me), men of common sense did not allow much for coincidences in making the ordinary calculations of life.

A strange shiver ran through me, but I fought against it. I couldn’t deny that this was quite a coincidence, one that would surely leave an impression on him. However, it was clear that p. 101remarkable coincidences happened all the time, and they should be considered when discussing this topic. Still, I had to admit, I added (since I thought I saw him about to challenge me), that sensible people don’t put much weight on coincidences when making everyday decisions.

He again begged to remark that he had not finished.

He once again asked to point out that he hadn't finished.

I again begged his pardon for being betrayed into interruptions.

I apologized again for getting caught up in interruptions.

“This,” he said, again laying his hand upon my arm, and glancing over his shoulder with hollow eyes, “was just a year ago.  Six or seven months passed, and I had recovered from the surprise and shock, when one morning, as the day was breaking, I, standing at that door, looked towards the red light, and saw the spectre again.”  He stopped, with a fixed look at me.

“This,” he said, placing his hand on my arm again and glancing over his shoulder with empty eyes, “was just a year ago. Six or seven months went by, and I had gotten over the surprise and shock when one morning, as dawn was breaking, I was standing at that door, looking towards the red light, and saw the ghost again.” He paused, staring intently at me.

“Did it cry out?”

"Did it shout?"

“No.  It was silent.”

“No. It was quiet.”

“Did it wave its arm?”

“Did it wave its arm?”

“No.  It leaned against the shaft of the light, with both hands before the face.  Like this.”

“No. It leaned against the light pole, with both hands covering its face. Like this.”

Once more, I followed his action with my eyes.  It was an action of mourning.  I have seen such an attitude in stone figures on tombs.

Once again, I watched his actions with my eyes. It was a gesture of mourning. I've seen this kind of stance in stone figures on gravestones.

“Did you go up to it?”

“Did you go up to it?”

p. 102“I came in and sat down, partly to collect my thoughts, partly because it had turned me faint.  When I went to the door again, daylight was above me, and the ghost was gone.”

p. 102“I walked in and sat down, partly to gather my thoughts and partly because I felt a bit lightheaded. When I went to the door again, daylight was shining above me, and the ghost had disappeared.”

“But nothing followed?  Nothing came of this?”

“But nothing happened? Nothing came of this?”

He touched me on the arm with his forefinger twice or thrice, giving a ghastly nod each time:

He tapped me on the arm with his finger two or three times, nodding grimly each time:

“That very day, as a train came out of the tunnel, I noticed, at a carriage window on my side, what looked like a confusion of hands and heads, and something waved.  I saw it, just in time to signal the driver, Stop!  He shut off, and put his brake on, but the train drifted past here a hundred and fifty yards or more.  I ran after it, and, as I went along, heard terrible screams and cries.  A beautiful young lady had died instantaneously in one of the compartments, and was brought in here, and laid down on this floor between us.”

“That very day, as a train emerged from the tunnel, I noticed, at a window on my side, what looked like a chaotic mix of hands and heads, and something was waving. I saw it just in time to signal the driver, 'Stop!' He cut the power and applied the brakes, but the train glided past here by a hundred and fifty yards or more. I chased after it, and as I ran, I heard terrible screams and cries. A young woman had died instantly in one of the compartments and was brought in here and laid down on this floor between us.”

Involuntarily, I pushed my chair back, as I looked from the boards at which he pointed, to himself.

Involuntarily, I pushed my chair back as I looked from the boards he was pointing at to him.

“True, sir.  True.  Precisely as it happened, so I tell it you.”

“That's right, sir. That's right. Just as it happened, that's how I'm telling it to you.”

I could think of nothing to say, to any purpose, and my mouth was very dry.  The wind and the wires took up the story with a long lamenting wail.

I couldn’t think of anything useful to say, and my mouth was really dry. The wind and the wires picked up the story with a long, mournful wail.

He resumed.  “Now, sir, mark this, and p. 103judge how my mind is troubled.  The spectre came back, a week ago.  Ever since, it has been there, now and again, by fits and starts.”

He continued. “Now, sir, pay attention to this, and p. 103see how troubled my mind is. The ghost returned a week ago. Since then, it has been showing up, sporadically.”

“At the light?”

"At the traffic light?"

“At the Danger-light.”

“At the warning light.”

“What does it seem to do?”

“What does it look like it does?”

He repeated, if possible with increased passion and vehemence, that former gesticulation of “For God’s sake clear the way!”

He repeated, possibly with even more passion and intensity, that earlier gesture of "For God's sake, clear the way!"

Then, he went on.  “I have no peace or rest for it.  It calls to me, for many minutes together, in an agonised manner, ‘Below there!  Look out!  Look out!’  It stands waving to me.  It rings my little bell—”

Then, he continued. “I can’t find any peace or rest because of it. It calls to me, for many minutes at a time, in an agonized voice, ‘Down there! Watch out! Watch out!’ It keeps waving to me. It rings my little bell—”

I caught at that.  “Did it ring your bell yesterday evening when I was here, and you went to the door?”

I got that. “Did it click for you yesterday evening when I was here, and you went to the door?”

“Twice.”

"Twice."

“Why, see,” said I, “how your imagination misleads you.  My eyes were on the bell, and my ears were open to the bell, and if I am a living man, it did not ring at those times.  No, nor at any other time, except when it was rung in the natural course of physical things by the station communicating with you.”

“Look,” I said, “you’re getting it all wrong. I was focused on the bell, and I was listening for it, and if I’m alive, it definitely didn’t ring at those moments. No, it only rang when it was actually rung by the station communicating with you.”

He shook his head.  “I have never made a mistake as to that, yet, sir.  I have never confused the spectre’s ring with the man’s.  The ghost’s ring is a strange vibration in the bell that it derives from nothing else, and I have not asserted that the bell stirs to the eye.  I p. 104don’t wonder that you failed to hear it.  But I heard it.”

He shook his head. “I’ve never gotten that wrong, sir. I’ve never mixed up the ghost’s ring with the man’s. The ghost’s ring is a unique vibration in the bell that comes from nowhere else, and I haven’t claimed that the bell moves to the eye. I don’t blame you for not hearing it. But I heard it.”

“And did the spectre seem to be there, when you looked out?”

“And did the ghost appear to be there when you looked out?”

“It was there.”

"It was there."

“Both times?”

"Twice?"

He repeated firmly: “Both times.”

He stated firmly: “Both times.”

“Will you come to the door with me, and look for it now?”

“Will you come to the door with me and check for it now?”

He bit his under-lip as though he were somewhat unwilling, but arose.  I opened the door, and stood on the step, while he stood in the doorway.  There, was the Danger-light.  There, was the dismal mouth of the tunnel.  There, were the high wet stone walls of the cutting.  There, were the stars above them.

He bit his lower lip like he was a bit reluctant, but got up. I opened the door and stood on the step while he stood in the doorway. There was the Danger-light. There was the gloomy entrance of the tunnel. There were the tall, wet stone walls of the cutting. There were the stars above them.

“Do you see it?” I asked him, taking particular note of his face.  His eyes were prominent and strained; but not very much more so, perhaps, than my own had been when I had directed them earnestly towards the same spot.

“Do you see it?” I asked him, paying close attention to his face. His eyes were wide and tense; but maybe not much more so than mine had been when I was focused intently on the same spot.

“No,” he answered.  “It is not there.”

“No,” he replied. “It’s not there.”

“Agreed,” said I.

"Agreed," I said.

We went in again, shut the door, and resumed our seats.  I was thinking how best to improve this advantage, if it might be called one, when he took up the conversation in such a matter of course way, so assuming that there could be no serious question of fact between p. 105us, that I felt myself placed in the weakest of positions.

We went in again, closed the door, and took our seats. I was considering how to make the most of this advantage, if it could even be considered one, when he casually continued the conversation, as if there could be no serious question about the facts between p. 105us. This made me feel like I was in the weakest position.

“By this time you will fully understand, sir,” he said, “that what troubles me so dreadfully, is the question, What does the spectre mean?”

“By this point, you’ll completely understand, sir,” he said, “that what bothers me so much is the question, What does the ghost mean?”

I was not sure, I told him, that I did fully understand.

I wasn't sure, I told him, that I completely understood.

“What is its warning against?” he said, ruminating, with his eyes on the fire, and only by times turning them on me.  “What is the danger?  Where is the danger?  There is danger overhanging, somewhere on the Line.  Some dreadful calamity will happen.  It is not to be doubted this third time, after what has gone before.  But surely this is a cruel haunting of me.  What can I do!”

“What is it warning me about?” he said, deep in thought, his eyes fixed on the fire, occasionally glancing at me. “What’s the danger? Where is the danger? There’s definitely something dangerous looming somewhere along the Line. Some terrible disaster is going to happen. After everything that’s happened before, there’s no doubt about it this time. But this is such a cruel obsession with me. What can I do!”

He pulled out his handkerchief, and wiped the drops from his heated forehead.

He pulled out his handkerchief and wiped the sweat from his forehead.

“If I telegraph Danger, on either side of me, or on both, I can give no reason for it,” he went on, wiping the palms of his hands.  “I should get into trouble, and do no good.  They would think I was mad.  This is the way it would work:—Message: ‘Danger!  Take care!’  Answer: ‘What danger?  Where?’  Message: ‘Don’t know.  But for God’s sake take care!’  They would displace me.  What else could they do?”

“If I send a warning about danger, whether on one side of me, the other, or both, I wouldn't be able to explain why,” he continued, wiping the palms of his hands. “I’d get into trouble and wouldn’t accomplish anything. They’d think I was crazy. Here’s how it would go:—Message: ‘Danger! Be careful!’ Reply: ‘What danger? Where?’ Message: ‘I don’t know. But for God’s sake, be careful!’ They would get rid of me. What else could they do?”

His pain of mind was most pitiable to see.  It was the mental torture of a conscientious p. 106man, oppressed beyond endurance by an unintelligible responsibility involving life.

His mental anguish was truly heartbreaking to witness. It was the psychological torment of a responsible person, weighed down beyond what anyone could bear by a confusing obligation involving life.

“When it first stood under the Danger-light,” he went on, putting his dark hair back from his head, and drawing his hands outward across and across his temples in an extremity of feverish distress, “why not tell me where that accident was to happen—if it must happen?  Why not tell me how it could be averted—if it could have been averted?  When on its second coming it hid its face, why not tell me instead: ‘She is going to die.  Let them keep her at home’?  If it came, on those two occasions, only to show me that its warnings were true, and so to prepare me for the third, why not warn me plainly now?  And I, Lord help me!  A mere poor signal-man on this solitary station!  Why not go to somebody with credit to be believed, and power to act!”

“When it first appeared under the Danger-light,” he continued, pushing his dark hair back from his forehead and running his hands across his temples in a fit of intense distress, “why not just tell me where that accident was going to happen—if it had to happen? Why not explain how it could have been avoided—if it could have been avoided? When it returned the second time and hid its face, why not say instead: ‘She is going to die. Keep her at home’? If it came on those two occasions just to prove that its warnings were valid and to prepare me for the third, why not just warn me clearly now? And here I am, Lord help me! A simple signal-man at this lonely station! Why not go to someone with authority who can be trusted and has the power to do something?”

When I saw him in this state, I saw that for the poor man’s sake, as well as for the public safety, what I had to do for the time was, to compose his mind.  Therefore, setting aside all question of reality or unreality between us, I represented to him that whoever thoroughly discharged his duty, must do well, and that at least it was his comfort that he understood his duty, though he did not understand these confounding Appearances.  In this effort I succeeded far better than in the attempt to reason him out of his conviction.  p. 107He became calm; the occupations incidental to his post as the night advanced, began to make larger demands on his attention; and I left him at two in the morning.  I had offered to stay through the night, but he would not hear of it.

When I saw him like this, I realized that for the sake of both the poor man and public safety, what I needed to do was calm him down. So, putting aside any questions about what was real or not between us, I explained to him that anyone who does their job well is doing a good thing, and at least he could take comfort in knowing he understood his responsibilities, even if he didn't grasp these confusing appearances. I actually succeeded much better in this than in trying to reason him out of his beliefs. He became more relaxed; the duties he had as the night went on started to demand more of his focus, and I left him at two in the morning. I had offered to stay the whole night, but he wouldn't hear of it. p. 107

That I more than once looked back at the red light as I ascended the pathway, that I did not like the red light, and that I should have slept but poorly if my bed had been under it, I see no reason to conceal.  Nor, did I like the two sequences of the accident and the dead girl.  I see no reason to conceal that, either.

That I looked back at the red light more than once as I went up the path, that I disliked the red light, and that I wouldn’t have slept well if my bed had been under it, I have no reason to hide. Nor did I like the two events of the accident and the dead girl. I have no reason to hide that, either.

But, what ran most in my thoughts was the consideration how ought I to act, having become the recipient of this disclosure?  I had proved the man to be intelligent, vigilant, painstaking, and exact; but how long might he remain so, in his state of mind?  Though in a subordinate position, still he held a most important trust, and would I (for instance) like to stake my own life on the chances of his continuing to execute it with precision?

But what troubled me the most was how I should behave now that I had received this information. I had seen that the man was smart, observant, hardworking, and precise; but how long would he stay that way, given his current state of mind? Even though he was in a lower position, he still had a very important responsibility, and would I, for instance, want to risk my own life on the chance that he would keep doing it correctly?

Unable to overcome a feeling that there would be something treacherous in my communicating what he had told me, to his superiors in the Company, without first being plain with himself and proposing a middle course to him, I ultimately resolved to offer to accompany him (otherwise keeping his secret for the present) to the wisest medical p. 108practitioner we could hear of in those parts, and to take his opinion.  A change in his time of duty would come round next night, he had apprised me, and he would be off an hour or two after sunrise, and on again soon after sunset.  I had appointed to return accordingly.

Unable to shake the feeling that sharing what he had told me with his superiors at the Company would be deceitful, I decided I needed to be upfront with him and suggest a middle path. In the end, I chose to offer to go with him—while still keeping his secret for now—to the most knowledgeable doctor we could find in the area and get his opinion. He informed me that his shift would change the next night, so he would be off an hour or two after sunrise and back on shortly after sunset. I had planned to return as scheduled.

Next evening was a lovely evening, and I walked out early to enjoy it.  The sun was not yet quite down when I traversed the field-path near the top of the deep cutting.  I would extend my walk for an hour, I said to myself, half an hour on and half an hour back, and it would then be time to go to my signal-man’s box.

Next evening was a beautiful evening, and I stepped outside early to enjoy it. The sun was still up when I walked along the path near the edge of the deep gorge. I decided to take a stroll for an hour, telling myself I’d go thirty minutes out and thirty minutes back, and then it would be time to head to my signal-man’s box.

Before pursuing my stroll, I stepped to the brink, and mechanically looked down, from the point from which I had first seen him.  I cannot describe the thrill that seized upon me, when, close at the mouth of the tunnel, I saw the appearance of a man, with his left sleeve across his eyes, passionately waving his right arm.

Before I went for my walk, I stepped to the edge and automatically looked down from the spot where I had first seen him. I can’t describe the rush I felt when, near the entrance of the tunnel, I spotted a man with his left sleeve over his eyes, fervently waving his right arm.

The nameless horror that oppressed me, passed in a moment, for in a moment I saw that this appearance of a man was a man indeed, and that there was a little group of other men standing at a short distance, to whom he seemed to be rehearsing the gesture he made.  The Danger-light was not yet lighted.  Against its shaft, a little low hut, entirely new to me, had been made of some wooden p. 109supports and tarpaulin.  It looked no bigger than a bed.

The unnamed fear that gripped me faded quickly, for in an instant, I realized that this figure, which I thought was a man, truly was a man, and there was a small group of other men standing nearby, watching the gesture he was making. The Danger-light wasn’t on yet. In front of it, there was a little, unfamiliar hut, completely new to me, made from some wooden supports and tarpaulin. It looked no bigger than a bed. p. 109

With an irresistible sense that something was wrong—with a flashing self-reproachful fear that fatal mischief had come of my leaving the man there, and causing no one to be sent to overlook or correct what he did—I descended the notched path with all the speed I could make.

With a strong feeling that something was off—along with a nagging fear that something bad had happened because I left that guy there, and didn't have anyone check on or fix what he was doing—I rushed down the uneven path as fast as I could.

“What is the matter?” I asked the men.

“What’s going on?” I asked the guys.

“Signal-man killed this morning, sir.”

"Signalman was killed this morning, sir."

“Not the man belonging to that box?”

“Isn’t that the guy from that box?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Sure, sir.”

“Not the man I know?”

"Not the guy I know?"

“You will recognise him, sir, if you knew him,” said the man who spoke for the others, solemnly uncovering his own head and raising an end of the tarpaulin, “for his face is quite composed.”

“You’ll recognize him, sir, if you knew him,” said the man who spoke for the others, seriously taking off his hat and lifting a corner of the tarpaulin, “because his face is very calm.”

“O! how did this happen, how did this happen?” I asked, turning from one to another as the hut closed in again.

“O! how did this happen, how did this happen?” I asked, looking from one person to another as the hut closed in again.

“He was cut down by an engine, sir.  No man in England knew his work better.  But somehow he was not clear of the outer rail.  It was just at broad day.  He had struck the light, and had the lamp in his hand.  As the engine came out of the tunnel, his back was towards her, and she cut him down.  That man drove her, and was showing how it happened.  Show the gentleman, Tom.”

“He was hit by a train, sir. No one in England knew his job better. But somehow, he wasn't far enough away from the outer rail. It was just broad daylight. He had switched on the light and was holding the lamp. As the train came out of the tunnel, his back was to it, and it hit him. That man was operating the train and was demonstrating how it happened. Show the gentleman, Tom.”

p. 110The man, who wore a rough dark dress, stepped back to his former place at the mouth of the tunnel:

p. 110The man, dressed in a worn dark outfit, stepped back to his original spot at the entrance of the tunnel:

“Coming round the curve in the tunnel, sir,” he said, “I saw him at the end, like as if I saw him down a perspective-glass.  There was no time to check speed, and I knew him to be very careful.  As he didn’t seem to take heed of the whistle, I shut it off when we were running down upon him, and called to him as loud as I could call.”

“Coming around the curve in the tunnel, sir,” he said, “I saw him at the end, almost like I was looking through a telescope. There wasn’t time to slow down, and I knew he was very cautious. Since he didn’t seem to notice the whistle, I turned it off as we were approaching him and shouted to him as loudly as I could.”

“What did you say?”

"What did you say?"

“I said, Below there!  Look out!  Look out!  For God’s sake clear the way!”

“I shouted, “Down there! Watch out! Watch out! For God’s sake, make way!”

I started.

I began.

“Ah! it was a dreadful time, sir.  I never left off calling to him.  I put this arm before my eyes, not to see, and I waved this arm to the last; but it was no use.”

“Ah! it was a terrible time, sir. I never stopped calling for him. I covered my eyes with this arm, trying not to see, and I waved this arm until the end; but it was pointless.”

 

Without prolonging the narrative to dwell on any one of its curious circumstances more than on any other, I may, in closing it, point out the coincidence that the warning of the Engine-Driver included, not only the words which the unfortunate Signal-man had repeated to me as haunting him, but also the words which I myself—not he—had attached, and that only in my own mind, to the gesticulation he had imitated.

Without dragging out the story to focus on any one odd detail more than another, I can, in wrapping it up, highlight the fact that the warning from the Engine-Driver included not only the words that the unfortunate Signal-man had echoed to me as haunting him, but also the words that I myself—not he—had connected, and only in my own mind, to the gesture he had copied.

p. 111No. 2 BRANCH LINE
THE ENGINE-DRIVER

“Altogether?  Well.  Altogether, since 1841, I’ve killed seven men and boys.  It ain’t many in all those years.”

“Overall? Well. Overall, since 1841, I’ve killed seven men and boys. That’s not a lot over all those years.”

These startling words he uttered in a serious tone as he leaned against the Station-wall.  He was a thick-set, ruddy-faced man, with coal-black eyes, the whites of which were not white, but a brownish-yellow, and apparently scarred and seamed, as if they had been operated upon.  They were eyes that had worked hard in looking through wind and weather.  He was dressed in a short black pea-jacket and grimy white canvas trousers, and wore on his head a flat black cap.  There was no sign of levity in his face.  His look was serious even to sadness, and there was an air of responsibility about his whole bearing which assured me that he spoke in earnest.

These surprising words came out in a serious tone as he leaned against the station wall. He was a stocky man with a ruddy face and coal-black eyes, which weren’t really white but a brownish-yellow, seemingly scarred and marked as if they had been operated on. They were eyes that had seen a lot through all kinds of weather. He wore a short black pea jacket and dirty white canvas pants, with a flat black cap on his head. There was no hint of humor on his face. His expression was serious, almost sad, and there was an air of responsibility about him that made it clear he was speaking sincerely.

“Yes, sir, I have been for five-and-twenty years a Locomotive Engine-driver; and in all p. 112that time, I’ve only killed seven men and boys.  There’s not many of my mates as can say as much for themselves.  Steadiness, sir—steadiness and keeping your eyes open, is what does it.  When I say seven men and boys, I mean my mates—stokers, porters, and so forth.  I don’t count passengers.”

“Yes, sir, I have been a Locomotive Engine-driver for twenty-five years, and in all that time, I’ve only killed seven men and boys. There aren’t many of my colleagues who can say the same. It’s all about steadiness, sir—steadiness and keeping your eyes open, that’s the key. When I mention seven men and boys, I’m talking about my coworkers—stokers, porters, and so on. I don’t include passengers.”

How did he become an engine-driver?

How did he become a train conductor?

“My father,” he said, “was a wheelwright in a small way, and lived in a little cottage by the side of the railway which runs betwixt Leeds and Selby.  It was the second railway laid down in the kingdom, the second after the Liverpool and Manchester, where Mr. Huskisson was killed, as you may have heard on, sir.  When the trains rushed by, we young ’uns used to run out to look at ’em, and hooray.  I noticed the driver turning handles, and making it go, and I thought to myself it would be a fine thing to be a engine-driver, and have the control of a wonderful machine like that.  Before the railway, the driver of the mail-coach was the biggest man I knew.  I thought I should like to be the driver of a coach.  We had a picture in our cottage of George the Third in a red coat.  I always mixed up the driver of the mail-coach—who had a red coat, too—with the king, only he had a low-crowned broad-brimmed hat, which the king hadn’t.  In my idea, the king couldn’t be a greater man than the driver of the mail-coach.  p. 113I had always a fancy to be a head man of some kind.  When I went to Leeds once, and saw a man conducting a orchestra, I thought I should like to be the conductor of a orchestra.  When I went home I made myself a baton, and went about the fields conducting a orchestra.  It wasn’t there, of course, but I pretended it was.  At another time, a man with a whip and a speaking-trumpet, on the stage outside a show, took my fancy, and I thought I should like to be him.  But when the train came, the engine-driver put them all in the shade, and I was resolved to be a engine-driver.  It wasn’t long before I had to do something to earn my own living, though I was only a young ’un.  My father died suddenly—he was killed by thunder and lightning while standing under a tree out of the rain—and mother couldn’t keep us all.  The day after my father’s burial I walked down to the station, and said I wanted to be a engine-driver.  The station-master laughed a bit, said I was for beginning early, but that I was not quite big enough yet.  He gave me a penny, and told me to go home and grow, and come again in ten years’ time.  I didn’t dream of danger then.  If I couldn’t be a engine-driver, I was determined to have something to do about a engine; so, as I could get nothing else, I went on board a Humber steamer, and broke up coals for the stoker.  That was how I p. 114began.  From that, I became a stoker, first on board a boat, and then on a locomotive.  Then, after two years’ service, I became a driver on the very Line which passed our cottage.  My mother and my brothers and sisters came out to look at me, the first day I drove.  I was watching for them and they was watching for me, and they waved their hands and hoora’d, and I waved my hand to them.  I had the steam well up, and was going at a rattling pace, and rare proud I was that minute.  Never was so proud in my life!

“My dad,” he said, “was a small-time wheelwright who lived in a little cottage by the railway that runs between Leeds and Selby. It was the second railway built in the country, right after the Liverpool and Manchester line, where Mr. Huskisson was killed, as you might have heard, sir. When the trains zoomed by, we kids would rush outside to watch them and cheer. I noticed the driver pulling levers and making it go, and I thought to myself it would be amazing to be an engine driver and have control of such a fantastic machine. Before the railway, the driver of the mail coach was the biggest deal I knew. I thought I’d like to be the driver of a coach. We had a picture in our cottage of George the Third in a red coat. I always mixed up the mail coach driver—who wore a red coat too—with the king, though the king didn’t have a low-crowned broad-brimmed hat, like the driver. To me, the king couldn’t be greater than the mail coach driver. I always dreamed of being a big shot of some kind. When I went to Leeds once and saw a man conducting an orchestra, I thought that would be a cool job. When I got home, I made a baton and pretended to conduct an orchestra in the fields. It wasn’t really there, of course, but I imagined it was. Another time, I saw a man with a whip and a speaking trumpet on a stage outside a show, and I thought I’d like to be him. But when the train arrived, the engine driver overshadowed everyone else, and I decided I wanted to be an engine driver. It wasn’t long before I had to find a way to earn a living, even though I was still pretty young. My dad passed away suddenly—he was struck by lightning while standing under a tree to avoid the rain—and my mom couldn’t support us all. The day after my dad’s funeral, I walked down to the station and said I wanted to be an engine driver. The station master chuckled a bit and said I was aiming high but that I wasn’t quite big enough yet. He gave me a penny and told me to go home, grow up, and come back in ten years. I didn’t think about dangers back then. If I couldn’t be an engine driver, I was determined to work with an engine somehow, so with no other options, I got on a Humber steamer and broke up coal for the stoker. That’s how I started. From there, I became a stoker, first on a boat and then on a locomotive. After two years, I became a driver on the very Line that passed our cottage. My mom and my brothers and sisters came out to watch me on my first day driving. I was looking for them, and they were looking for me, waving their hands and cheering, and I waved back. I had the steam built up and was going at a fast pace, and I was so proud at that moment. Never felt so proud in my life!

“When a man has a liking for a thing it’s as good as being clever.  In a very short time I became one of the best drivers on the Line.  That was allowed.  I took a pride in it, you see, and liked it.  No, I didn’t know much about the engine scientifically, as you call it; but I could put her to rights if anything went out of gear—that is to say, if there was nothing broken—but I couldn’t have explained how the steam worked inside.  Starting a engine, it’s just like drawing a drop of gin.  You turn a handle and off she goes; then you turn the handle the other way, put on the brakes, and you stop her.  There’s not much more in it, so far.  It’s no good being scientific and knowing the principle of the engine inside; no good at all.  Fitters, who know all the ins and outs of the engine, make the worst drivers.  p. 115That’s well known.  They know too much.  It’s just as I’ve heard of a man with regard to his inside: if he knew what a complicated machine it is, he would never eat, or drink, or dance, or run, or do anything, for fear of busting something.  So it is with fitters.  But us as are not troubled with such thoughts, we go ahead.

“When a guy enjoys something, it’s just as good as being smart. In no time, I became one of the best drivers on the Line. That was encouraged. I took pride in it, you see, and I enjoyed it. No, I didn’t know much about the engine scientifically, as you’d call it; but I could fix it if anything went out of whack—that is, if nothing was broken—but I couldn’t explain how the steam worked inside. Starting an engine is just like pouring a shot of gin. You turn a handle, and off it goes; then you turn the handle the other way, put on the brakes, and you stop it. There’s not much more to it than that. It doesn’t help to be scientific and understand the engine's principles inside and out; it really doesn’t. Mechanics, who know all the ins and outs of the engine, make the worst drivers. p. 115That’s well known. They know too much. It’s like I’ve heard about a guy regarding his insides: if he realized how complicated it is, he would never eat, drink, dance, run, or do anything for fear of breaking something. It’s the same with mechanics. But us folks who aren’t weighed down by such thoughts just keep going.”

“But starting a engine’s one thing and driving of her is another.  Any one, a child a’most, can turn on the steam and turn it off again; but it ain’t every one that can keep a engine well on the road, no more than it ain’t every one who can ride a horse properly.  It is much the same thing.  If you gallop a horse right off for a mile or two, you take the wind out of him, and for the next mile or two you must let him trot or walk.  So it is with a engine.  If you put on too much steam, to get over the ground at the start, you exhaust the boiler, and then you’ll have to crawl along till your fresh water boils up.  The great thing in driving, is, to go steady, never to let your water get too low, nor your fire too low.  It’s the same with a kettle.  If you fill it up when it’s about half empty, it soon comes to the boil again; but if you don’t fill it up until the water’s nearly out, it’s a long time in coming to the boil again.  Another thing; you should never make spurts, unless you are detained and lose time.  You should p. 116go up a incline and down a incline at the same pace.  Sometimes a driver will waste his steam, and when he comes to a hill he has scarcely enough to drag him up.  When you’re in a train that goes by fits and starts, you may be sure that there is a bad driver on the engine.  That kind of driving frightens passengers dreadful.  When the train, after rattling along, suddenly slackens speed when it ain’t near a station, it may be in the middle of a tunnel, the passengers think there is danger.  But generally it’s because the driver has exhausted his steam.

“But starting an engine is one thing, and driving it is another. Almost anyone, even a child, can turn on the steam and turn it off again; but not everyone can keep an engine running smoothly on the road, just like not everyone can ride a horse properly. It’s pretty much the same concept. If you push a horse to gallop for a mile or two, you tire it out, and for the next mile or two, you have to let it trot or walk. The same goes for an engine. If you apply too much steam at the beginning, you’ll drain the boiler, and then you’ll have to move slowly until your fresh water heats up again. The key to driving is to maintain a steady pace, never letting your water get too low or your fire too low. It’s like with a kettle; if you fill it up when it’s about half empty, it boils again quickly, but if you wait until the water’s almost gone, it takes a long time to boil again. Another point: you should never make sudden spurts unless you’re running behind and need to catch up. You should climb and descend hills at the same speed. Sometimes, a driver will waste steam, and when it’s time to face a hill, there’s barely enough power to get up it. When you’re on a train that starts and stops randomly, you can bet there’s a poor driver at the controls. That kind of driving really frightens passengers. When the train, after speeding along, suddenly slows down without being near a station—maybe in the middle of a tunnel—it makes passengers think there’s a problem. But usually, it’s just because the driver has run out of steam.”

“I drove the Brighton express, four or five years before I come here, and the annuals—that is, the passengers who had annual tickets—always said they knew when I was on the engine, because they wasn’t jerked.  Gentlemen used to say as they came on to the platform, ‘Who drives to-day—Jim Martin?’  And when the guard told them yes, they said ‘All right,’ and took their seats quite comfortable.  But the driver never gets so much as a shilling; the guard comes in for all that, and he does nothing much.  Few ever think of the driver.  I dare say they think the train goes along of itself; yet if we didn’t keep a sharp look-out, know our duty, and do it, they might all go smash at any moment.  I used to make that journey to Brighton in fifty-two minutes.  The papers said forty-nine minutes, but that p. 117was coming it a little too strong.  I had to watch signals all the way, one every two miles, so that me and my stoker were on the stretch all the time, doing two things at once—attending to the engine and looking out.  I’ve driven on this Line, eighty-one miles and three-quarters, in eighty-six minutes.  There’s no danger in speed if you have a good road, a good engine, and not too many coaches behind.  No, we don’t call them carriages, we call them ‘coaches.’

“I drove the Brighton express four or five years before I got here, and the regulars—that is, the passengers with annual tickets—always said they could tell when I was driving because the ride was smooth. Gentlemen would say as they came onto the platform, ‘Who’s driving today—Jim Martin?’ And when the guard said yes, they replied, ‘All right,’ and settled into their seats comfortably. But the driver doesn’t earn a single penny; the guard gets all that, and he doesn’t do much. Few ever think about the driver. I suppose they think the train runs by itself; yet if we didn’t keep a close watch, know our duties, and do them, it could all go wrong at any moment. I used to make that trip to Brighton in fifty-two minutes. The papers claimed it was forty-nine minutes, but that was pushing it a bit too far. I had to watch signals all the way, one every two miles, so my stoker and I were always on our toes, doing two things at once—attending to the engine and keeping an eye out. I’ve driven on this line, eighty-one miles and three-quarters, in eighty-six minutes. There’s no danger in speed if you have a good track, a reliable engine, and not too many coaches behind. No, we don’t call them carriages; we call them ‘coaches.’”

“Yes; oscillation means danger.  If you’re ever in a coach that oscillates much, tell of it at the first station and get it coupled up closer.  Coaches when they’re too loose are apt to jump, or swing off the rails; and it’s quite as dangerous when they’re coupled up too close.  There ought to be just space enough for the buffers to work easy.  Passengers are frightened in tunnels, but there’s less danger, now, in tunnels than anywhere else.  We never enter a tunnel unless it’s signalled Clear.

“Yes; oscillation means danger. If you’re ever in a train car that sways a lot, let the conductor know at the first station and have it moved closer to the other cars. When train cars are too loose, they can bounce or derail; and it’s equally risky when they’re linked too tightly. There should be just enough space for the buffers to move smoothly. Passengers get scared in tunnels, but there’s actually less risk, now, in tunnels than anywhere else. We never go into a tunnel unless it’s marked Clear.”

“A train can be stopped wonderful quick, even when running express, if the guards act with the driver and clap on all the brakes promptly.  Much depends upon the guards.  One brake behind, is as good as two in front.  The engine, you see, loses weight as she burns her coals and consumes her water, but the coaches behind don’t alter.  We have a good deal of trouble with young guards.  In their p. 118anxiety to perform their duties, they put on the brakes too soon, so that sometimes we can scarcely drag the train into the station; when they grow older at it they are not so anxious, and don’t put them on soon enough.  It’s no use to say, when an accident happens, that they did not put on the brakes in time; they swear they did, and you can’t prove that they didn’t.

“A train can be stopped really quickly, even when it's going fast, if the crew works well with the driver and applies all the brakes immediately. A lot depends on the crew. One brake behind is just as effective as two in front. The engine, you see, loses weight as it burns fuel and uses water, but the coaches behind stay the same. We often have trouble with inexperienced crew members. In their eagerness to do their job, they apply the brakes too soon, which sometimes makes it really hard to get the train into the station; as they gain experience, they tend to be less eager and don't apply them soon enough. It’s pointless to say, when an accident happens, that they didn’t brake in time; they insist they did, and you can’t prove otherwise.

“Do I think that the tapping of the wheels with a hammer is a mere ceremony?  Well, I don’t know exactly; I should not like to say.  It’s not often that the chaps find anything wrong.  They may sometimes be half asleep when a train comes into a station in the middle of the night.  You would be yourself.  They ought to tap the axle-box, but they don’t.

“Do I think that tapping the wheels with a hammer is just a formality? Well, I’m not really sure; I wouldn’t want to say. It’s not common for the guys to find anything wrong. They might sometimes be half asleep when a train arrives at a station in the middle of the night. You would be too. They should tap the axle-box, but they don’t.”

“Many accidents take place that never get into the papers; many trains, full of passengers, escape being dashed to pieces by next door to a miracle.  Nobody knows anything about it but the driver and the stoker.  I remember once, when I was driving on the Eastern Counties.  Going round a curve, I suddenly saw a train coming along on the same line of rails.  I clapped on the brake, but it was too late, I thought.  Seeing the engine almost close upon us, I cried to my stoker to jump.  He jumped off the engine, almost before the words were out of my mouth.  I was just taking my hand off the lever to follow, when the coming train turned off on the points, and p. 119the next instant the hind coach passed my engine by a shave.  It was the nearest touch I ever saw.  My stoker was killed.  In another half second I should have jumped off and been killed too.  What would have become of the train without us is more than I can tell you.

“Many accidents happen that never make the news; many trains, packed with passengers, narrowly avoid crashing due to what feels like a miracle. Only the driver and the stoker are aware of it. I remember once when I was driving on the Eastern Counties. As I rounded a curve, I suddenly saw a train coming towards us on the same track. I hit the brakes, but I thought it was too late. Seeing the engine almost upon us, I shouted for my stoker to jump. He leaped off the engine almost before I finished speaking. I was just about to take my hand off the lever to follow when the oncoming train switched off onto the points, and the next moment, the last coach passed my engine by a hair's breadth. It was the closest call I’ve ever experienced. My stoker was killed. In another half second, I would have jumped off and been killed too. What would have happened to the train without us is beyond my understanding.

“There are heaps of people run over, that no one ever hears about.  One dark night in the Black Country, me and my mate felt something wet and warm splash in our faces.  ‘That didn’t come from the engine, Bill,’ I said.  ‘No,’ he said; ‘it’s something thick, Jim.’  It was blood.  That’s what it was.  We heard afterwards that a collier had been run over.  When we kill any of our own chaps, we say as little about it as possible.  It’s generally—mostly always—their own fault.  No, we never think of danger ourselves.  We’re used to it, you see.  But we’re not reckless.  I don’t believe there’s any body of men that takes more pride in their work than engine-drivers do.  We are as proud and as fond of our engines as if they were living things; as proud of them as a huntsman or a jockey is of his horse.  And a engine has almost as many ways as a horse; she’s a kicker, a plunger, a roarer, or what not, in her way.  Put a stranger on to my engine, and he wouldn’t know what to do with her.  Yes; there’s wonderful improvements in engines since the last great Exhibition.  Some of them p. 120take up their water without stopping.  That’s a wonderful invention, and yet as simple as A B C.  There are water-troughs at certain places, lying between the rails.  By moving a lever you let down the mouth of a scoop into the water, and as you rush along the water is forced into the tank, at the rate of three thousand gallons a minute.

“There are tons of people who get run over that nobody ever hears about. One dark night in the Black Country, my mate and I felt something wet and warm splash on our faces. ‘That didn’t come from the engine, Bill,’ I said. ‘No,’ he replied; ‘it’s something thick, Jim.’ It was blood. That’s what it was. We found out later that a miner had been run over. When we kill any of our own guys, we tend to keep it as quiet as possible. It’s usually—almost always—their own fault. No, we never think about danger ourselves. We’re used to it, you see. But we’re not careless. I don’t think there’s any group of people that takes more pride in their work than engine-drivers do. We’re as proud and as attached to our engines as if they were living beings; as proud of them as a huntsman or a jockey is of his horse. And an engine has almost as many quirks as a horse does; she’s a kicker, a plunger, a roarer, or whatever, in her own way. Put a stranger on my engine, and he wouldn’t know what to do with her. Yes; there have been amazing improvements in engines since the last great Exhibition. Some of them take up their water without stopping. That’s a fantastic invention, yet as simple as A B C. There are water-troughs at certain spots, lying between the rails. By moving a lever, you let down the mouth of a scoop into the water, and as you race along, the water is forced into the tank at a rate of three thousand gallons a minute.

“A engine-driver’s chief anxiety is to keep time; that’s what he thinks most of.  When I was driving the Brighton express, I always felt like as if I was riding a race against time.  I had no fear of the pace; what I feared was losing way, and not getting in to the minute.  We have to give in an account of our time when we arrive.  The company provides us with watches, and we go by them.  Before starting on a journey, we pass through a room to be inspected.  That’s to see if we are sober.  But they don’t say nothing to us, and a man who was a little gone might pass easy.  I’ve known a stoker that had passed the inspection, come on to the engine as drunk as a fly, flop down among the coals, and sleep there like a log for the whole run.  I had to be my own stoker then.  If you ask me if engine-drivers are drinking men, I must answer you that they are pretty well.  It’s trying work; one half of you cold as ice; t’other half hot as fire; wet one minute, dry the next.  If ever a man had an excuse for drinking, that man’s p. 121a engine-driver.  And yet I don’t know if ever a driver goes upon his engine drunk.  If he was to, the wind would soon sober him.

An engine driver's biggest worry is to stay on schedule; that's what he thinks about most. When I was driving the Brighton express, I always felt like I was in a race against time. I wasn’t scared of the speed; what I feared was falling behind and not arriving on the dot. We have to account for our time when we get there. The company gives us watches, and we rely on them. Before starting a trip, we go through a room to be checked. That’s to ensure we're sober. But they don’t say anything to us, and a guy who's had a few drinks can easily pass. I’ve known a stoker who passed the inspection and showed up on the engine completely wasted, flopped down among the coals, and slept like a log for the entire trip. I had to be my own stoker then. If you ask me whether engine drivers drink, I’d have to say most of them do. It’s tough work; one half of you is freezing, the other half is scorching; wet one minute, dry the next. If anyone has a reason to drink, it's an engine driver. And yet, I can’t say I’ve ever seen a driver operate his engine while drunk. If he did, the wind would quickly sober him up.

“I believe engine-drivers, as a body, are the healthiest fellows alive; but they don’t live long.  The cause of that, I believe to be the cold food, and the shaking.  By the cold food, I mean that a engine-driver never gets his meals comfortable.  He’s never at home to his dinner.  When he starts away the first thing in the morning, he takes a bit of cold meat and a piece of bread with him for his dinner; and generally he has to eat it in the shed, for he mustn’t leave his engine.  You can understand how the jolting and shaking knocks a man up, after a bit.  The insurance companies won’t take us at ordinary rates.  We’re obliged to be Foresters, or Old Friends, or that sort of thing, where they ain’t so particular.  The wages of a engine-driver average about eight shillings a day, but if he’s a good schemer with his coals—yes, I mean if he economises his coals—he’s allowed so much more.  Some will make from five to ten shillings a week that way.  I don’t complain of the wages particular; but it’s hard lines for such as us, to have to pay income-tax.  The company gives an account of all our wages, and we have to pay.  It’s a shame.

“I think train drivers, in general, are the healthiest people around, but they don't live very long. I believe the reason for that is the cold food and the constant shaking. By cold food, I mean that a train driver never gets to eat comfortably. He’s never home for dinner. When he heads out first thing in the morning, he takes some cold meat and a piece of bread for lunch, and usually, he has to eat it in the shed because he can't leave his engine. You can imagine how the jolting and shaking wear a person down over time. The insurance companies won’t cover us at standard rates. We have to go with Foresters, or Old Friends, or similar companies, where they aren’t as strict. A train driver’s wages average about eight shillings a day, but if he’s good at managing his coal—yes, I mean if he economizes his coal—he can earn a bit more. Some can make an extra five to ten shillings a week that way. I don’t really complain about the wages; it’s just tough for people like us to pay income tax. The company accounts for all our wages, and we have to pay. It’s unfair."

“Our domestic life—our life at home, you mean?  Well, as to that, we don’t see much p. 122of our families.  I leave home at half-past seven in the morning, and don’t get back again until half-past nine, or maybe later.  The children are not up when I leave, and they’ve gone to bed again before I come home.  This is about my day:—Leave London at 8.45; drive for four hours and a half; cold snack on the engine step; see to engine; drive back again; clean engine; report myself; and home.  Twelve hours’ hard and anxious work, and no comfortable victuals.  Yes, our wives are anxious about us; for we never know when we go out, if we’ll ever come back again.  We ought to go home the minute we leave the station, and report ourselves to those that are thinking on us and depending on us; but I’m afraid we don’t always.  Perhaps we go first to the public-house, and perhaps you would, too, if you were in charge of a engine all day long.  But the wives have a way of their own, of finding out if we’re all right.  They inquire among each other.  ‘Have you seen my Jim?’ one says.  ‘No,’ says another, ‘but Jack see him coming out of the station half an hour ago.’  Then she knows that her Jim’s all right, and knows where to find him if she wants him.  It’s a sad thing when any of us have to carry bad news to a mate’s wife.  None of us likes that job.  I remember when Jack Davidge was killed, none of us could face his poor p. 123missus with the news.  She had seven children, poor thing, and two of ’em, the youngest, was down with the fever.  We got old Mrs. Berridge—Tom Berridge’s mother—to break it to her.  But she knew summat was the matter, the minute the old woman went in, and, afore she spoke a word, fell down like as if she was dead.  She lay all night like that, and never heard from mortal lips until next morning that her Jack was killed.  But she knew it in her heart.  It’s a pitch and toss kind of a life ours!

“Our home life—you mean our life at home? Well, we don’t see much of our families. I leave home at 7:30 in the morning and don’t get back until 9:30 or maybe later. The kids aren't awake when I leave, and they’ve gone to bed again by the time I come home. Here’s how my day goes: Leave London at 8:45; drive for four and a half hours; have a cold snack on the engine step; check the engine; drive back; clean the engine; report in; and then head home. Twelve hours of hard, stressful work with no decent food. Yeah, our wives worry about us because we never know if we’ll come back after we leave. We should go home right after we leave the station and report to those who care about us and depend on us, but I’m afraid we don’t always do that. Maybe we stop at the pub first, and you might too if you were in charge of an engine all day long. But the wives have their own ways of finding out if we’re okay. They ask each other, ‘Have you seen my Jim?’ One says, ‘No, but Jack saw him coming out of the station half an hour ago.’ Then she knows her Jim is fine and where to find him if she needs him. It’s heartbreaking when one of us has to deliver bad news to a mate’s wife. None of us wants to take on that task. I remember when Jack Davidge was killed; none of us could face his poor wife with the news. She had seven kids, poor thing, and two of them, the youngest, were down with fever. We got old Mrs. Berridge—Tom Berridge’s mother—to tell her. But she sensed something was wrong the minute the old woman walked in, and before a word was spoken, she collapsed as if she were dead. She lay like that all night and didn’t hear from anyone until the next morning that her Jack was killed. But she knew it in her heart. It’s a toss-up sort of life we lead!"

“And yet I never was nervous on a engine but once.  I never think of my own life.  You go in for staking that, when you begin, and you get used to the risk.  I never think of the passengers either.  The thoughts of a engine-driver never go behind his engine.  If he keeps his engine all right, the coaches behind will be all right, as far as the driver is concerned.  But once I did think of the passengers.  My little boy, Bill, was among them that morning.  He was a poor little cripple fellow that we all loved more nor the others, because he was a cripple, and so quiet, and wise-like.  He was going down to his aunt in the country, who was to take care of him for a while.  We thought the country air would do him good.  I did think there were lives behind me that morning; at least, I thought hard of one little life that was in p. 124my hands.  There were twenty coaches on; my little Bill seemed to me to be in every one of ’em.  My hand trembled as I turned on the steam.  I felt my heart thumping as we drew close to the pointsman’s box; as we neared the Junction, I was all in a cold sweat.  At the end of the first fifty miles I was nearly eleven minutes behind time.  ‘What’s the matter with you this morning?’ my stoker said.  ‘Did you have a drop too much last night?’  ‘Don’t speak to me, Fred,’ I said, ‘till we get to Peterborough; and keep a sharp look-out, there’s a good fellow.’  I never was so thankful in my life as when I shut off steam to enter the station at Peterborough.  Little Bill’s aunt was waiting for him, and I saw her lift him out of the carriage.  I called out to her to bring him to me, and I took him upon the engine and kissed him—ah, twenty times I should think—making him in such a mess with grease and coal-dust as you never saw.

"And yet I was only nervous on the engine once. I never think about my own life. You accept that risk when you start, and you get used to it. I don’t think about the passengers either. An engine driver's thoughts never go beyond his engine. If he keeps his engine running smoothly, the coaches behind will be fine, at least from his perspective. But there was one time I did think about the passengers. My little boy, Bill, was among them that morning. He was a poor little crippled boy, and we all loved him more than the others because he was a cripple and so quiet and wise. He was going to his aunt in the country, who would take care of him for a while. We thought the country air would do him good. That morning, I did think there were lives behind me; at least, I thought a lot about one little life that was in my hands. There were twenty coaches; it felt like my little Bill was in every single one of them. My hand trembled as I turned on the steam. I could feel my heart racing as we got close to the pointsman’s box; as we approached the Junction, I was sweating cold. At the end of the first fifty miles, I was nearly eleven minutes behind schedule. ‘What’s wrong with you this morning?’ my stoker said. ‘Did you have a little too much to drink last night?’ ‘Don’t talk to me, Fred,’ I said, ‘until we get to Peterborough; and keep a sharp lookout, will you?’ I had never been so thankful in my life as when I cut the steam to enter the station at Peterborough. Little Bill’s aunt was waiting for him, and I saw her lift him out of the carriage. I called out to her to bring him to me, and I picked him up onto the engine and kissed him—oh, probably twenty times—making him such a mess with grease and coal dust like you’ve never seen."

“I was all right for the rest of the journey.  And I do believe, sir, the passengers were safer after little Bill was gone.  It would never do, you see, for engine-drivers to know too much, or to feel too much.”

“I was fine for the rest of the trip. And I honestly believe, sir, that the passengers were safer after little Bill had left. It wouldn’t be good, you see, for train drivers to know too much or to feel too much.”

p. 125No. 3 BRANCH LINE
THE COMPENSATION HOUSE

“There’s not a looking-glass in all the house, sir.  It’s some peculiar fancy of my master’s.  There isn’t one in any single room in the house.”

“There’s not a mirror in the entire house, sir. It’s some strange quirk of my master’s. There isn’t one in any room at all.”

It was a dark and gloomy-looking building, and had been purchased by this Company for an enlargement of their Goods Station.  The value of the house had been referred to what was popularly called “a compensation jury,” and the house was called, in consequence, The Compensation House.  It had become the Company’s property; but its tenant still remained in possession, pending the commencement of active building operations.  My attention was originally drawn to this house because it stood directly in front of a collection of huge pieces of timber which lay near this part of the Line, and on which I sometimes sat for half an hour at a time, when I was tired by my wanderings about Mugby Junction.

It was a dark and gloomy-looking building that this Company had bought to expand their Goods Station. The house's value was determined by what was commonly known as “a compensation jury,” which is why it was referred to as The Compensation House. It had become the Company’s property, but its tenant was still living there while waiting for the building work to start. I first noticed this house because it was right in front of a collection of large pieces of timber that were located nearby on the Line, and I would sometimes sit on them for half an hour at a time when I was tired from wandering around Mugby Junction.

p. 126It was square, cold, grey-looking, built of rough-hewn stone, and roofed with thin slabs of the same material.  Its windows were few in number, and very small for the size of the building.  In the great blank, grey broad-side, there were only four windows.  The entrance-door was in the middle of the house; there was a window on either side of it, and there were two more in the single story above.  The blinds were all closely drawn, and, when the door was shut, the dreary building gave no sign of life or occupation.

p. 126It was a square, cold, gray-looking building made of rough stone and topped with thin slabs of the same material. It had very few windows, and those were quite small for its size. On the large, blank gray wall, there were only four windows. The entrance door was in the center of the house, with a window on either side and two more in the single story above. All the blinds were tightly closed, and when the door was shut, the gloomy building showed no signs of life or activity.

But the door was not always shut.  Sometimes it was opened from within, with a great jingling of bolts and door-chains, and then a man would come forward and stand upon the door-step, snuffing the air as one might do who was ordinarily kept on rather a small allowance of that element.  He was stout, thick-set, and perhaps fifty or sixty years old—a man whose hair was cut exceedingly close, who wore a large bushy beard, and whose eye had a sociable twinkle in it which was prepossessing.  He was dressed, whenever I saw him, in a greenish-brown frock-coat made of some material which was not cloth, wore a waistcoat and trousers of light colour, and had a frill to his shirt—an ornament, by the way, which did not seem to go at all well with the beard, which was continually in contact with it.  It was the custom of this p. 127worthy person, after standing for a short time on the threshold inhaling the air, to come forward into the road, and, after glancing at one of the upper windows in a half mechanical way, to cross over to the logs, and, leaning over the fence which guarded the railway, to look up and down the Line (it passed before the house) with the air of a man accomplishing a self-imposed task of which nothing was expected to come.  This done, he would cross the road again, and turning on the threshold to take a final sniff of air, disappeared once more within the house, bolting and chaining the door again as if there were no probability of its being reopened for at least a week.  Yet half an hour had not passed before he was out in the road again, sniffing the air and looking up and down the Line as before.

But the door wasn’t always shut. Sometimes it would be opened from inside, with a loud jingling of bolts and door chains, and then a man would step forward and stand on the doorstep, sniffing the air like someone who usually had a limited supply of it. He was stout and solidly built, probably around fifty or sixty years old—a man with very closely cropped hair, a large bushy beard, and a friendly twinkle in his eye that was quite appealing. Whenever I saw him, he wore a greenish-brown frock coat made from a material that wasn’t cloth, along with a light-colored waistcoat and trousers, and a frill on his shirt—an accessory that really didn’t match well with the beard, which was constantly brushing against it. It was this worthy fellow’s custom to stand on the threshold for a moment, taking in the air, before stepping out into the street. After glancing at one of the upper windows in a somewhat automatic way, he would walk over to the logs, leaning over the fence that bordered the railway to look up and down the Line (which ran right in front of the house), as if he were completing a task he had set for himself that no one expected him to accomplish. Once he had done that, he would cross back to the road, turn on the doorstep for one last sniff of air, and disappear into the house again, bolting and chaining the door as if it wouldn’t be opened again for at least a week. Yet less than half an hour later, he would be out in the road again, sniffing the air and looking up and down the Line as before.

It was not very long before I managed to scrape acquaintance with this restless personage.  I soon found out that my friend with the shirt-frill was the confidential servant, butler, valet, factotum, what you will, of a sick gentleman, a Mr. Oswald Strange, who had recently come to inhabit the house opposite, and concerning whose history my new acquaintance, whose name I ascertained was Masey, seemed disposed to be somewhat communicative.  His master, it appeared, had come down to this place, partly for the sake of p. 128reducing his establishment—not, Mr. Masey was swift to inform me, on economical principles, but because the poor gentleman, for particular reasons, wished to have few dependents about him—partly in order that he might be near his old friend, Dr. Garden, who was established in the neighbourhood, and whose society and advice were necessary to Mr. Strange’s life.  That life was, it appeared, held by this suffering gentleman on a precarious tenure.  It was ebbing away fast with each passing hour.  The servant already spoke of his master in the past tense, describing him to me as a young gentleman not more than five-and-thirty years of age, with a young face, as far as the features and build of it went, but with an expression which had nothing of youth about it.  This was the great peculiarity of the man.  At a distance he looked younger than he was by many years, and strangers, at the time when he had been used to get about, always took him for a man of seven or eight-and-twenty, but they changed their minds on getting nearer to him.  Old Masey had a way of his own of summing up the peculiarities of his master, repeating twenty times over: “Sir, he was Strange by name, and Strange by nature, and Strange to look at into the bargain.”

It wasn't long before I got to know this restless character. I soon discovered that my friend with the frilly shirt was the trusted servant, butler, valet, and all-around helper of a sick man, Mr. Oswald Strange, who had recently moved into the house across the street. My new acquaintance, whose name I found out was Masey, seemed eager to share some details about his master. It turned out that Mr. Strange had come to this place partly to downsize his household—not for financial reasons, Masey quickly emphasized, but because the poor man, for specific reasons, wanted to have fewer people around him—partly so he could be close to his old friend, Dr. Garden, who lived nearby and whose company and advice were essential for Mr. Strange’s well-being. It seemed that this suffering man was living on borrowed time, as his life was fading quickly with each hour. Masey already spoke about his master in the past tense, describing him as a young man no more than thirty-five, with a youthful-looking face, but an expression that lacked any sign of youth. This was the man's striking peculiarity. From a distance, he appeared many years younger, and strangers, when he was able to go out, often mistook him for someone in his late twenties, but that opinion changed once they got closer. Masey had his own way of summarizing his master's oddities, repeating many times: “Sir, he was Strange by name, and Strange by nature, and Strange to look at into the bargain.”

It was during my second or third interview with the old fellow that he uttered the words quoted at the beginning of this plain narrative.

It was during my second or third interview with the old guy that he said the words quoted at the beginning of this straightforward story.

p. 129“Not such a thing as a looking-glass in all the house,” the old man said, standing beside my piece of timber, and looking across reflectively at the house opposite.  “Not one.”

p. 129“There isn't a single mirror in the whole house,” the old man said, standing next to my piece of wood and gazing thoughtfully at the house across the street. “Not one.”

“In the sitting-rooms, I suppose you mean?”

“In the living rooms, I guess you mean?”

“No, sir, I mean sitting-rooms and bedrooms both; there isn’t so much as a shaving-glass as big as the palm of your hand anywhere.”

“No, sir, I mean living rooms and bedrooms too; there's not even a shaving mirror as big as the palm of your hand anywhere.”

“But how is it?” I asked.  “Why are there no looking-glasses in any of the rooms?”

“But how is it?” I asked. “Why aren’t there any mirrors in any of the rooms?”

“Ah, sir!” replied Masey, “that’s what none of us can ever tell.  There is the mystery.  It’s just a fancy on the part of my master.  He had some strange fancies, and this was one of them.  A pleasant gentleman he was to live with, as any servant could desire.  A liberal gentleman, and one who gave but little trouble; always ready with a kind word, and a kind deed, too, for the matter of that.  There was not a house in all the parish of St. George’s (in which we lived before we came down here) where the servants had more holidays or a better table kept; but, for all that, he had his queer ways and his fancies, as I may call them, and this was one of them.  And the point he made of it, sir,” the old man went on; “the extent to which that regulation was enforced, whenever a new servant was engaged; and the changes in the establishment it occasioned.  In hiring a new servant, the very first stipulation made, was that about the looking-glasses.  It p. 130was one of my duties to explain the thing, as far as it could be explained, before any servant was taken into the house.  ‘You’ll find it an easy place,’ I used to say, ‘with a liberal table, good wages, and a deal of leisure; but there’s one thing you must make up your mind to; you must do without looking-glasses while you’re here, for there isn’t one in the house, and, what’s more, there never will be.’”

“Ah, sir!” Masey replied, “that’s something none of us can ever explain. That’s the mystery. It’s just a quirk of my master. He had some strange ideas, and this was one of them. He was a pleasant gentleman to live with, as any servant could wish for. A generous man, and one who caused very little trouble; always ready with a kind word, and a kind action, too, for that matter. There wasn’t a house in all of St. George’s parish (where we lived before coming here) that gave the servants more time off or had a better standard of living; but still, he had his odd habits and his quirks, as I might call them, and this was one of them. And the emphasis he placed on it, sir,” the old man continued; “the extent to which that rule was enforced whenever a new servant was hired; and the changes it caused in the household. When bringing in a new servant, the very first condition was about the mirrors. It was one of my responsibilities to explain the situation, as much as I could, before any servant joined the household. ‘You’ll find it an easy place,’ I used to say, ‘with generous meals, good pay, and plenty of free time; but there’s one thing you need to accept; you won’t find any mirrors while you’re here, because there isn’t one in the house, and what’s more, there never will be.’”

“But how did you know there never would be one?” I asked.

“But how did you know there would never be one?” I asked.

“Lor’ bless you, sir!  If you’d seen and heard all that I’d seen and heard, you could have no doubt about it.  Why, only to take one instance:—I remember a particular day when my master had occasion to go into the housekeeper’s room where the cook lived, to see about some alterations that were making, and when a pretty scene took place.  The cook—she was a very ugly woman, and awful vain—had left a little bit of looking-glass, about six inches square, upon the chimney-piece; she had got it surreptious, and kept it always locked up; but she’d left it out, being called away suddenly, while titivating her hair.  I had seen the glass, and was making for the chimney-piece as fast as I could; but master came in front of it before I could get there, and it was all over in a moment.  He gave one long piercing look into it, turned deadly pale, and seizing the glass, dashed it p. 131into a hundred pieces on the floor, and then stamped upon the fragments and ground them into powder with his feet.  He shut himself up for the rest of that day in his own room, first ordering me to discharge the cook, then and there, at a moment’s notice.”

“Goodness, sir! If you’d seen and heard everything I have, you wouldn’t doubt it at all. Let me give you just one example: I remember a specific day when my master needed to go into the housekeeper’s room where the cook worked to check on some renovations. A pretty crazy scene unfolded. The cook—she was quite an ugly woman and incredibly vain—had left a small mirror, about six inches square, on the mantelpiece. She had gotten it secretly and always kept it locked away, but she left it out when she was rushed while fixing her hair. I had spotted the mirror and was heading for the mantelpiece as quickly as I could, but my master got in front of it before I could reach it, and it all happened so fast. He took one long, piercing look into it, turned dead pale, grabbed the mirror, and smashed it into a hundred pieces on the floor. Then he stomped on the shards and ground them into dust with his feet. He locked himself in his room for the rest of the day, first telling me to fire the cook right then and there, without any notice.”

“What an extraordinary thing!” I said, pondering.

“What an amazing thing!” I said, thinking.

“Ah, sir,” continued the old man, “it was astonishing what trouble I had with those women-servants.  It was difficult to get any that would take the place at all under the circumstances.  ‘What not so much as a mossul to do one’s ’air at?’ they would say, and they’d go off, in spite of extra wages.  Then those who did consent to come, what lies they would tell, to be sure!  They would protest that they didn’t want to look in the glass, that they never had been in the habit of looking in the glass, and all the while that very wench would have her looking-glass of some kind or another, hid away among her clothes up-stairs.  Sooner or later, she would bring it out too, and leave it about somewhere or other (just like the cook), where it was as likely as not that master might see it.  And then—for girls like that have no consciences, sir—when I had caught one of ’em at it, she’d turn round as bold as brass, ‘And how am I to know whether my ’air’s parted straight?’ she’d say, just as if it hadn’t been considered in her wages that that was the p. 132very thing which she never was to know while she lived in our house.  A vain lot, sir, and the ugly ones always the vainest.  There was no end to their dodges.  They’d have looking-glasses in the interiors of their workbox-lids, where it was next to impossible that I could find ’em, or inside the covers of hymn-books, or cookery-books, or in their caddies.  I recollect one girl, a sly one she was, and marked with the small-pox terrible, who was always reading her prayer-book at odd times.  Sometimes I used to think what a religious mind she’d got, and at other times (depending on the mood I was in) I would conclude that it was the marriage-service she was studying; but one day, when I got behind her to satisfy my doubts—lo and behold! it was the old story: a bit of glass, without a frame, fastened into the kiver with the outside edges of the sheets of postage-stamps.  Dodges!  Why they’d keep their looking-glasses in the scullery or the coal-cellar, or leave them in charge of the servants next door, or with the milk-woman round the corner; but have ’em they would.  And I don’t mind confessing, sir,” said the old man, bringing his long speech to an end, “that it was an inconveniency not to have so much as a scrap to shave before.  I used to go to the barber’s at first, but I soon gave that up, and took to wearing my beard as my master did; likewise to keeping my hair”p. 133—Mr. Masey touched his head as he spoke—“so short, that it didn’t require any parting, before or behind.”

“Ah, sir,” the old man continued, “I had quite a bit of trouble with those female servants. It was tough to find anyone willing to take the job under the circumstances. They’d say, ‘What, not even a little bit of space to do my hair?’ and then they’d bail, even with extra pay. And those who did agree to come, what lies they would tell! They’d insist they didn’t want to look in the mirror, that they had never been in the habit of doing so, while all the while that very girl would have some kind of mirror hidden among her clothes upstairs. Sooner or later, she’d bring it out and leave it lying around (just like the cook), where it was likely that the master might see it. And then—because girls like that have no scruples, sir—when I caught one of them at it, she’d turn around as bold as brass and say, ‘And how am I supposed to know if my hair is parted straight?’ just as if it hadn’t been part of her wages to know that while she lived in our house. A vain bunch, sir, and the unattractive ones are always the vainest. They had endless tricks. They’d stash mirrors inside their workbox lids, where I could hardly find them, or tucked inside hymn book covers, recipe books, or in their tea caddies. I remember one girl, a crafty one marked badly by smallpox, who was always reading her prayer book at odd times. Sometimes I thought she had a really religious mind, and other times (depending on my mood) I suspected she was studying the marriage service; but one day when I snuck up behind her to satisfy my doubts—lo and behold! It was the old story: a piece of glass without a frame, stuck into the cover with the edges of postage stamps. Tricks! They’d keep their mirrors in the scullery or the coal cellar, or leave them with the neighbors’ servants, or with the milkwoman around the corner; but they had to have them. And I don’t mind admitting, sir,” the old man concluded, “that it was a real inconvenience not having even a scrap to shave with. I used to go to the barber at first, but I soon gave that up and started wearing my beard like my master did; also keeping my hair”—Mr. Masey touched his head as he spoke—“so short that it didn’t require any parting, front or back.”

I sat for some time lost in amazement, and staring at my companion.  My curiosity was powerfully stimulated, and the desire to learn more was very strong within me.

I sat for a while, amazed, staring at my companion. My curiosity was really piqued, and I had a strong urge to learn more.

“Had your master any personal defect,” I inquired, “which might have made it distressing to him to see his own image reflected?”

“Did your master have any personal flaws,” I asked, “that might have made it uncomfortable for him to see his own reflection?”

“By no means, sir,” said the old man.  “He was as handsome a gentleman as you would wish to see: a little delicate-looking and careworn, perhaps, with a very pale face; but as free from any deformity as you or I, sir.  No, sir, no; it was nothing of that.”

“Not at all, sir,” said the old man. “He was as handsome a gentleman as you could hope to see: a bit delicate-looking and tired, maybe, with a very pale face; but as free from any deformity as you or I, sir. No, sir, no; it was nothing like that.”

“Then what was it?  What is it?” I asked, desperately.  “Is there no one who is, or has been, in your master’s confidence?”

“Then what was it? What is it?” I asked desperately. “Is there no one who is, or has been, trusted by your master?”

“Yes, sir,” said the old fellow, with his eyes turning to that window opposite.  “There is one person who knows all my master’s secrets, and this secret among the rest.”

“Yes, sir,” said the old guy, his eyes shifting to the window across from them. “There’s one person who knows all my master’s secrets, including this one.”

“And who is that?”

“Who’s that?”

The old man turned round and looked at me fixedly.  “The doctor here,” he said.  “Dr. Garden.  My master’s very old friend.”

The old man turned around and looked at me intensely. “The doctor here,” he said. “Dr. Garden. My master’s very old friend.”

“I should like to speak with this gentleman,” I said, involuntarily.

“I would like to talk to this gentleman,” I said, without thinking.

“He is with my master now,” answered Masey.  “He will be coming out presently, p. 134and I think I may say he will answer any question you may like to put to him.”  As the old man spoke, the door of the house opened, and a middle-aged gentleman, who was tall and thin, but who lost something of his height by a habit of stooping, appeared on the step.  Old Masey left me in a moment.  He muttered something about taking the doctor’s directions, and hastened across the road.  The tall gentleman spoke to him for a minute or two very seriously, probably about the patient up-stairs, and it then seemed to me from their gestures that I myself was the subject of some further conversation between them.  At all events, when old Masey retired into the house, the doctor came across to where I was standing, and addressed me with a very agreeable smile.

“He's with my boss right now,” Masey replied. “He'll be coming out shortly, p. 134and I think I can say he’ll answer any question you want to ask him.” As the old man spoke, the door of the house opened, and a middle-aged gentleman appeared on the step. He was tall and thin but seemed to lose some of his height due to a habit of stooping. Old Masey left me in a moment. He muttered something about taking the doctor’s instructions and hurried across the road. The tall gentleman spoke to him seriously for a minute or two, probably about the patient upstairs, and it seemed to me from their gestures that I was also the subject of some further conversation between them. In any case, when old Masey went back into the house, the doctor came over to where I was standing and greeted me with a friendly smile.

“John Masey tells me that you are interested in the case of my poor friend, sir.  I am now going back to my house, and if you don’t mind the trouble of walking with me, I shall be happy to enlighten you as far as I am able.”

“John Masey told me that you’re interested in the case of my poor friend, sir. I’m heading back to my house now, and if you don’t mind the walk, I’d be glad to share what I know.”

I hastened to make my apologies and express my acknowledgments, and we set off together.  When we had reached the doctor’s house and were seated in his study, I ventured to inquire after the health of this poor gentleman.

I quickly apologized and expressed my thanks, and we headed out together. When we arrived at the doctor's house and were settled in his study, I took the chance to ask about the health of this unfortunate man.

“I am afraid there is no amendment, nor any prospect of amendment,” said the doctor.  “Old Masey has told you something of his strange condition, has he not?”

“I’m afraid there’s no cure, nor any chance of one,” said the doctor. “Old Masey has told you a bit about his unusual condition, hasn’t he?”

p. 135“Yes, he has told me something,” I answered, “and he says you know all about it.”

p. 135“Yeah, he mentioned something to me,” I replied, “and he says you’re fully aware of it.”

Dr. Garden looked very grave.  “I don’t know all about it.  I only know what happens when he comes into the presence of a looking-glass.  But as to the circumstances which have led to his being haunted in the strangest fashion that I ever heard of, I know no more of them than you do.”

Dr. Garden looked very serious. “I don’t know everything about it. I only know what happens when he stands in front of a mirror. But as for the circumstances that caused him to be haunted in the oddest way I’ve ever heard, I know no more about them than you do.”

“Haunted?” I repeated.  “And in the strangest fashion that you ever heard of?”

“Haunted?” I said. “And in the weirdest way you’ve ever heard of?”

Dr. Garden smiled at my eagerness, seemed to be collecting his thoughts, and presently went on:

Dr. Garden smiled at my enthusiasm, appeared to be gathering his thoughts, and then continued:

“I made the acquaintance of Mr. Oswald Strange in a curious way.  It was on board of an Italian steamer, bound from Civita Vecchia to Marseilles.  We had been travelling all night.  In the morning I was shaving myself in the cabin, when suddenly this man came behind me, glanced for a moment into the small mirror before which I was standing, and then, without a word of warning, tore it from the nail, and dashed it to pieces at my feet.  His face was at first livid with passion—it seemed to me rather the passion of fear than of anger—but it changed after a moment, and he seemed ashamed of what he had done.  Well,” continued the doctor, relapsing for a moment into a smile, “of course I was in a devil of a rage.  I was operating on my under-jaw, and p. 136the start the thing gave me caused me to cut myself.  Besides, altogether it seemed an outrageous and insolent thing, and I gave it to poor Strange in a style of language which I am sorry to think of now, but which, I hope, was excusable at the time.  As to the offender himself, his confusion and regret, now that his passion was at an end, disarmed me.  He sent for the steward, and paid most liberally for the damage done to the steam-boat property, explaining to him, and to some other passengers who were present in the cabin, that what had happened had been accidental.  For me, however, he had another explanation.  Perhaps he felt that I must know it to have been no accident—perhaps he really wished to confide in some one.  At all events, he owned to me that what he had done was done under the influence of an uncontrollable impulse—a seizure which took him, he said, at times—something like a fit.  He begged my pardon, and entreated that I would endeavour to disassociate him personally from this action, of which he was heartily ashamed.  Then he attempted a sickly joke, poor fellow, about his wearing a beard, and feeling a little spiteful, in consequence, when he saw other people taking the trouble to shave; but he said nothing about any infirmity or delusion, and shortly after left me.

“I met Mr. Oswald Strange in a strange way. It was on an Italian steamer traveling from Civita Vecchia to Marseilles. We had been traveling all night. In the morning, I was shaving in the cabin when suddenly this man came up behind me, glanced for a moment into the small mirror I was using, and then, without any warning, ripped it off the wall and smashed it at my feet. His face was first pale with rage—it seemed more like fear than anger—but after a moment, it changed, and he looked ashamed of what he had done. Well,” the doctor continued, falling into a smile for a moment, “of course I was really furious. I was operating on my jaw, and the jolt made me cut myself. Plus, it felt like an outrageous and rude act, and I let poor Strange have it with words I regret now, but which I hope were excusable at the time. As for the offender himself, his embarrassment and remorse, now that his anger had passed, softened my reaction. He called for the steward and paid generously for the damage done to the steamboat's property, explaining to him and to some other passengers in the cabin that what had happened was an accident. For me, though, he had a different explanation. Maybe he thought I needed to know it wasn’t really an accident—maybe he actually wanted to confide in someone. Anyway, he admitted to me that his actions were driven by an uncontrollable impulse—something he said hit him sometimes—like a fit. He apologized and asked that I try to separate him personally from this action, which he was truly ashamed of. Then he made a weak joke, poor guy, about having a beard and feeling a bit spiteful about it when he saw others taking the time to shave, but he didn’t mention any illness or delusion and left me shortly after.”

“In my professional capacity I could not p. 137help taking some interest in Mr. Strange.  I did not altogether lose sight of him after our sea-journey to Marseilles was over.  I found him a pleasant companion up to a certain point; but I always felt that there was a reserve about him.  He was uncommunicative about his past life, and especially would never allude to anything connected with his travels or his residence in Italy, which, however, I could make out had been a long one.  He spoke Italian well, and seemed familiar with the country, but disliked to talk about it.

“In my job, I couldn't help but take an interest in Mr. Strange. I didn't completely lose track of him after our sea trip to Marseilles ended. I found him to be a pleasant companion up to a certain point, but I always sensed that there was some distance between us. He was not very open about his past and especially avoided mentioning anything related to his travels or time living in Italy, which I could tell had been extensive. He spoke Italian well and appeared to know the country, but he was reluctant to discuss it.”

“During the time we spent together there were seasons when he was so little himself, that I, with a pretty large experience, was almost afraid to be with him.  His attacks were violent and sudden in the last degree; and there was one most extraordinary feature connected with them all:—some horrible association of ideas took possession of him whenever he found himself before a looking-glass.  And after we had travelled together for a time, I dreaded the sight of a mirror hanging harmlessly against a wall, or a toilet-glass standing on a dressing-table, almost as much as he did.

“During the time we spent together, there were times when he was so not himself that, with my considerable experience, I was almost scared to be around him. His outbursts were incredibly violent and sudden; and there was one particularly strange thing about them: some horrific association of ideas completely took over him whenever he saw his reflection in a mirror. After we had traveled together for a while, I started to dread the sight of a mirror hanging innocently on a wall or a small mirror on a dresser almost as much as he did.”

“Poor Strange was not always affected in the same manner by a looking-glass.  Sometimes it seemed to madden him with fury; at other times, it appeared to turn him to stone: remaining motionless and speechless as if p. 138attacked by catalepsy.  One night—the worst things always happen at night, and oftener than one would think on stormy nights—we arrived at a small town in the central district of Auvergne: a place but little known, out of the line of railways, and to which we had been drawn, partly by the antiquarian attractions which the place possessed, and partly by the beauty of the scenery.  The weather had been rather against us.  The day had been dull and murky, the heat stifling, and the sky had threatened mischief since the morning.  At sundown, these threats were fulfilled.  The thunderstorm, which had been all day coming up—as it seemed to us, against the wind—burst over the place where we were lodged, with very great violence.

“Poor Strange wasn’t always affected by a mirror in the same way. Sometimes it seemed to drive him into a rage; at other times, it made him go completely still: frozen and silent as if p. 138he were hit by a seizure. One night—the worst things always happen at night, and more often than you'd expect on stormy nights—we arrived in a small town in the central part of Auvergne: a place not well-known, off the railway lines, and we were drawn there partly by the historical charm it offered and partly by the beauty of the landscape. The weather had been rather unfriendly. The day was dull and gray, the heat oppressive, and the sky had been threatening trouble since morning. At sunset, those threats came true. The thunderstorm, which had been building up all day—as it seemed to us, against the wind—burst over the place where we were staying with great intensity.

“There are some practical-minded persons with strong constitutions, who deny roundly that their fellow-creatures are, or can be, affected, in mind or body, by atmospheric influences.  I am not a disciple of that school, simply because I cannot believe that those changes of weather, which have so much effect upon animals, and even on inanimate objects, can fail to have some influence on a piece of machinery so sensitive and intricate as the human frame.  I think, then, that it was in part owing to the disturbed state of the atmosphere that, on this particular evening I felt nervous and depressed.  When my new p. 139friend Strange and I parted for the night, I felt as little disposed to go to rest as I ever did in my life.  The thunder was still lingering among the mountains in the midst of which our inn was placed.  Sometimes it seemed nearer, and at other times further off; but it never left off altogether, except for a few minutes at a time.  I was quite unable to shake off a succession of painful ideas which persistently besieged my mind.

“There are some practical people with strong constitutions who firmly deny that their fellow humans are, or can be, affected in mind or body by the weather. I'm not part of that group because I can't believe that changes in the weather, which have such an impact on animals and even on inanimate objects, wouldn't affect something as sensitive and complex as the human body. So, I think it was partly due to the unsettling state of the atmosphere that on this particular evening, I felt nervous and down. When my new friend Strange and I said goodnight, I felt less inclined to rest than I ever had in my life. The thunder was still rumbling among the mountains where our inn was located. Sometimes it seemed closer, and at other times further away, but it never completely stopped, except for a few minutes at a time. I was totally unable to shake off a flood of painful thoughts that kept invading my mind.”

“It is hardly necessary to add that I thought from time to time of my travelling-companion in the next room.  His image was almost continually before me.  He had been dull and depressed all the evening, and when we parted for the night there was a look in his eyes which I could not get out of my memory.

“It’s not really necessary to mention that I occasionally thought about my roommate in the next room. His image was almost constantly in my mind. He had been so dull and down all evening, and when we said goodnight, there was a look in his eyes that I couldn’t shake off.”

“There was a door between our rooms, and the partition dividing them was not very solid; and yet I had heard no sound since I parted from him which could indicate that he was there at all, much less that he was awake and stirring.  I was in a mood, sir, which made this silence terrible to me, and so many foolish fancies—as that he was lying there dead, or in a fit, or what not—took possession of me, that at last I could bear it no longer.  I went to the door, and, after listening, very attentively but quite in vain, for any sound, I at last knocked pretty sharply.  There was no p. 140answer.  Feeling that longer suspense would be unendurable, I, without more ceremony, turned the handle and went in.

“There was a door between our rooms, and the wall dividing them wasn’t very sturdy; yet I hadn’t heard a single sound since I left him that could suggest he was even there, let alone that he was awake and moving around. I was in a mood, sir, that made this silence unbearable for me, and so many absurd thoughts—like that he was lying there dead, or having a seizure, or something like that—overwhelmed me, until I finally couldn’t stand it anymore. I went to the door and, after listening very carefully but totally in vain for any noise, I finally knocked pretty sharply. There was no p. 140answer. Feeling that I couldn’t handle the suspense any longer, I just turned the handle and went in.”

“It was a great bare room, and so imperfectly lighted by a single candle that it was almost impossible—except when the lightning flashed—to see into its great dark corners.  A small rickety bedstead stood against one of the walls, shrouded by yellow cotton curtains, passed through a great iron ring in the ceiling.  There was, for all other furniture, an old chest of drawers which served also as a washing-stand, having a small basin and ewer and a single towel arranged on the top of it.  There were, moreover, two ancient chairs and a dressing-table.  On this last, stood a large old-fashioned looking-glass with a carved frame.

“It was a spacious, bare room, and the lighting from a single candle was so poor that it was nearly impossible—except when the lightning flashed—to see into the deep dark corners. A small, rickety bed frame was against one wall, draped with yellow cotton curtains attached to a large iron ring in the ceiling. The only other furniture consisted of an old chest of drawers that also served as a washing stand, with a small basin, ewer, and a single towel set on top. Additionally, there were two ancient chairs and a dressing table. On that table stood a large, old-fashioned mirror with a carved frame.”

“I must have seen all these things, because I remember them so well now, but I do not know how I could have seen them, for it seems to me that, from the moment of my entering that room, the action of my senses and of the faculties of my mind was held fast by the ghastly figure which stood motionless before the looking-glass in the middle of the empty room.

“I must have seen all these things, because I remember them so clearly now, but I don’t know how I could have seen them, since it feels like, from the moment I walked into that room, my senses and my mind were frozen by the horrifying figure that stood still in front of the mirror in the middle of the empty room.”

“How terrible it was!  The weak light of one candle standing on the table shone upon Strange’s face, lighting it from below, and throwing (as I now remember) his shadow, p. 141vast and black, upon the wall behind him and upon the ceiling overhead.  He was leaning rather forward, with his hands upon the table supporting him, and gazing into the glass which stood before him with a horrible fixity.  The sweat was on his white face; his rigid features and his pale lips showed in that feeble light were horrible, more than words can tell, to look at.  He was so completely stupefied and lost, that the noise I had made in knocking and in entering the room was unobserved by him.  Not even when I called him loudly by name did he move or did his face change.

“How terrible it was! The dim light of one candle on the table illuminated Strange’s face from below, casting his shadow, as I now remember, vast and black on the wall behind him and the ceiling above. He was leaning forward, resting his hands on the table, staring into the glass in front of him with a horrible intensity. Sweat glistened on his pale face; his stiff features and pale lips looked ghastly in that weak light, more than words can express. He was so completely dazed and lost that he didn’t even notice the noise I made when I knocked and entered the room. Not even when I called out his name loudly did he stir or change his expression.

“What a vision of horror that was, in the great dark empty room, in a silence that was something more than negative, that ghastly figure frozen into stone by some unexplained terror!  And the silence and the stillness!  The very thunder had ceased now.  My heart stood still with fear.  Then, moved by some instinctive feeling, under whose influence I acted mechanically, I crept with slow steps nearer and nearer to the table, and at last, half expecting to see some spectre even more horrible than this which I saw already, I looked over his shoulder into the looking-glass.  I happened to touch his arm, though only in the lightest manner.  In that one moment the spell which had held him—who knows how long?—enchained, seemed broken, and he p. 142lived in this world again.  He turned round upon me, as suddenly as a tiger makes its spring, and seized me by the arm.

“What a terrifying scene that was, in the vast dark empty room, in a silence that felt like more than just lack of sound, that horrifying figure locked in place by some unknown fear! And the silence and stillness! Even the thunder had stopped now. My heart froze with fear. Then, driven by some instinctive feeling, acting almost on autopilot, I slowly crept closer and closer to the table, and at last, half expecting to see an even more terrifying specter than the one before me, I looked over his shoulder into the mirror. I accidentally touched his arm, just lightly. In that instant, the spell that had trapped him—who knows for how long?—seemed to shatter, and he p. 142returned to this world again. He spun around to face me, as suddenly as a tiger lunges at its prey, and grabbed me by the arm.

“I have told you that even before I entered my friend’s room I had felt, all that night, depressed and nervous.  The necessity for action at this time was, however, so obvious, and this man’s agony made all that I had felt, appear so trifling, that much of my own discomfort seemed to leave me.  I felt that I must be strong.

“I told you that even before I walked into my friend’s room, I had felt, all night, down and anxious. The need to take action was so clear at that moment, and this man’s suffering made everything I had felt seem so insignificant, that much of my own unease faded away. I felt that I had to be strong.

“The face before me almost unmanned me.  The eyes which looked into mine were so scared with terror, the lips—if I may say so—looked so speechless.  The wretched man gazed long into my face, and then, still holding me by the arm, slowly, very slowly, turned his head.  I had gently tried to move him away from the looking-glass, but he would not stir, and now he was looking into it as fixedly as ever.  I could bear this no longer, and, using such force as was necessary, I drew him gradually away, and got him to one of the chairs at the foot of the bed.  ‘Come!’ I said—after the long silence my voice, even to myself, sounded strange and hollow—‘come!  You are over-tired, and you feel the weather.  Don’t you think you ought to be in bed?  Suppose you lie down.  Let me try my medical skill in mixing you a composing draught.’

“The face in front of me almost overwhelmed me. The eyes looking into mine were filled with fear, the lips—if I can put it that way—looked completely speechless. The poor man stared at my face for a long time, and then, still holding onto my arm, slowly turned his head. I had gently tried to pull him away from the mirror, but he wouldn’t budge, and now he was gazing into it more intently than ever. I couldn't take it any longer, and with the necessary force, I gradually pulled him away and got him to one of the chairs at the foot of the bed. 'Come!' I said—after the long silence, my voice, even to me, sounded strange and empty—'come! You’re exhausted, and you’re feeling the weather. Don’t you think you should be in bed? How about lying down? Let me put my medical skills to use and mix you a soothing drink.’”

p. 143“He held my hand, and looked eagerly into my eyes.  ‘I am better now,’ he said, speaking at last very faintly.  Still he looked at me in that wistful way.  It seemed as if there were something that he wanted to do or say, but had not sufficient resolution.  At length he got up from the chair to which I had led him, and beckoning me to follow him, went across the room to the dressing-table, and stood again before the glass.  A violent shudder passed through his frame as he looked into it; but apparently forcing himself to go through with what he had now begun, he remained where he was, and, without looking away, moved to me with his hand to come and stand beside him.  I complied.

p. 143“He held my hand and gazed eagerly into my eyes. ‘I feel better now,’ he said, speaking very softly at last. Still, he looked at me with that longing expression. It seemed like there was something he wanted to do or say, but he didn’t have the courage. Finally, he got up from the chair I had led him to, gestured for me to follow, and walked across the room to the dressing table, standing again in front of the mirror. A violent shudder ran through his body as he looked at his reflection; but evidently pushing himself to continue with what he had started, he stayed where he was, and without taking his eyes off the mirror, motioned for me to come and stand beside him. I obliged.

“‘Look in there!’ he said, in an almost inaudible tone.  He was supported, as before, by his hands resting on the table, and could only bow with his head towards the glass to intimate what he meant.  ‘Look in there!’ he repeated.

“‘Look in there!’ he said, in a barely audible voice. He still had his hands resting on the table for support and could only nod his head toward the glass to indicate what he meant. ‘Look in there!’ he said again.”

“I did as he asked me.

I did what he asked me to do.

“‘What do you see?’ he asked next.

“‘What do you see?’ he asked next.

“‘See?’ I repeated, trying to speak as cheerfully as I could, and describing the reflexion of his own face as nearly as I could.  ‘I see a very, very pale face with sunken cheeks—’

“‘See?’ I repeated, trying to sound as cheerful as I could, and describing the reflection of his own face as closely as I could. ‘I see a really, really pale face with sunken cheeks—’”

“‘What?’ he cried, with an alarm in his voice which I could not understand.

“‘What?’ he yelled, with a panic in his voice that I couldn’t grasp.

p. 144“‘With sunken cheeks,’ I went on, ‘and two hollow eyes with large pupils.’

p. 144“‘With sunken cheeks,’ I continued, ‘and two hollow eyes with big pupils.’

“I saw the reflexion of my friend’s face change, and felt his hand clutch my arm even more tightly than he had done before.  I stopped abruptly and looked round at him.  He did not turn his head towards me, but, gazing still into the looking-glass, seemed to labour for utterance.

“I saw the reflection of my friend’s face change, and felt his hand grip my arm even more tightly than before. I stopped suddenly and looked at him. He didn’t turn his head towards me, but still staring into the mirror, seemed to struggle to speak.

“‘What,’ he stammered at last.  ‘Do you—see it—too?’

“‘What,’ he stammered finally. ‘Do you—see it—too?’”

“‘See what?’ I asked, quickly.

"‘See what?’ I asked quickly."

“‘That face!’ he cried, in accents of horror.  ‘That face—which is not mine—and which—I see instead of mine—always!’

“‘That face!’ he yelled, with a tone of horror. ‘That face—which isn’t mine—and which—I see instead of my own—always!’”

“I was struck speechless by the words.  In a moment this mystery was explained—but what an explanation!  Worse, a hundred times worse, than anything I had imagined.  What!  Had this man lost the power of seeing his own image as it was reflected there before him? and, in its place, was there the image of another?  Had he changed reflexions with some other man?  The frightfulness of the thought struck me speechless for a time—then I saw how false an impression my silence was conveying.

“I was left speechless by the words. In an instant, this mystery was revealed—but what a revelation! It was a hundred times worse than anything I had imagined. What! Had this man lost the ability to see his own reflection as it appeared right in front of him? And in its place, was there the reflection of someone else? Had he swapped reflections with another man? The horror of that thought left me speechless for a moment—then I realized how misleading my silence was.”

“‘No, no, no!’ I cried, as soon as I could speak—‘a hundred times, no!  I see you, of course, and only you.  It was your face I attempted to describe, and no other.’

“‘No, no, no!’ I shouted as soon as I could speak—‘a hundred times, no! I see you, of course, and only you. It was your face I was trying to describe, and no one else's.’”

p. 145“He seemed not to hear me.  ‘Why, look there!’ he said, in a low, indistinct voice, pointing to his own image in the glass.  ‘Whose face do you see there?’

p. 145“He didn’t seem to hear me. ‘Hey, look at that!’ he said in a low, unclear voice, pointing to his reflection in the mirror. ‘Whose face do you see there?’

“‘Why yours, of course.’  And then, after a moment, I added, ‘Whose do you see?’

“‘Why yours, of course.’ And then, after a moment, I added, ‘Whose do you see?’”

“He answered, like one in a trance, ‘His—only his—always his!’  He stood still a moment, and then, with a loud and terrific scream, repeated those words, ‘Always his, always his,’ and fell down in a fit before me.

“He answered, like someone in a daze, ‘His—only his—always his!’ He paused for a moment, and then, with a loud and horrifying scream, shouted those words again, ‘Always his, always his,’ and collapsed in a seizure right in front of me."

 

“I knew what to do now.  Here was a thing which, at any rate, I could understand.  I had with me my usual small stock of medicines and surgical instruments, and I did what was necessary: first to restore my unhappy patient, and next to procure for him the rest he needed so much.  He was very ill—at death’s door for some days—and I could not leave him, though there was urgent need that I should be back in London.  When he began to mend, I sent over to England for my servant—John Masey—whom I knew I could trust.  Acquainting him with the outlines of the case, I left him in charge of my patient, with orders that he should be brought over to this country as soon as he was fit to travel.

“I knew what to do now. This was something I could understand. I had my usual small stash of medicines and surgical tools with me, so I did what was needed: first to help my poor patient recover, and then to ensure he got the rest he desperately needed. He was very sick—on the brink of death for several days—and I couldn’t leave him, even though I urgently needed to get back to London. When he started to improve, I sent for my servant—John Masey—whom I trusted. I briefed him on the situation and left him in charge of my patient, instructing him to bring him over to this country as soon as he was well enough to travel.”

“That awful scene was always before me.  I saw this devoted man day after day, with the eyes of my imagination, sometimes destroying in p. 146his rage the harmless looking-glass, which was the immediate cause of his suffering, sometimes transfixed before the horrid image that turned him to stone.  I recollect coming upon him once when we were stopping at a roadside inn, and seeing him stand so by broad daylight.  His back was turned towards me, and I waited and watched him for nearly half an hour as he stood there motionless and speechless, and appearing not to breathe.  I am not sure but that this apparition seen so by daylight was more ghastly than that apparition seen in the middle of the night, with the thunder rumbling among the hills.

“That terrible scene was always in my mind. I watched this dedicated man day after day, in my imagination, sometimes smashing the harmless mirror that was the direct cause of his pain, and other times frozen in front of the horrific image that petrified him. I remember encountering him once when we were staying at a roadside inn, seeing him standing there in broad daylight. His back was to me, and I waited and observed him for almost half an hour as he stood there, still and silent, seemingly not even breathing. I'm not sure, but witnessing that figure in daylight felt more chilling than seeing it in the middle of the night, with the thunder rumbling in the background.”

“Back in London in his own house, where he could command in some sort the objects which should surround him, poor Strange was better than he would have been elsewhere.  He seldom went out except at night, but once or twice I have walked with him by daylight, and have seen him terribly agitated when we have had to pass a shop in which looking-glasses were exposed for sale.

“Back in London in his own house, where he could somewhat control the things around him, poor Strange was better off than he would have been anywhere else. He rarely went out except at night, but once or twice I walked with him during the day and saw him really upset when we had to walk past a shop that sold mirrors.

“It is nearly a year now since my poor friend followed me down to this place, to which I have retired.  For some months he has been daily getting weaker and weaker, and a disease of the lungs has become developed in him, which has brought him to his death-bed.  I should add, by-the-by, that John Masey has been his constant companion ever since I brought them p. 147together, and I have had, consequently, to look after a new servant.

“It’s nearly been a year since my poor friend came with me to this place where I’ve settled down. For a few months now, he has been getting weaker each day, and a lung disease has developed, bringing him to his deathbed. By the way, I should mention that John Masey has been his constant companion ever since I brought them together, so I’ve had to find a new servant.” p. 147

“And now tell me,” the doctor added, bringing his tale to an end, “did you ever hear a more miserable history, or was ever man haunted in a more ghastly manner than this man?”

“And now tell me,” the doctor continued, wrapping up his story, “have you ever heard a more miserable tale, or has any man ever been haunted in a more terrifying way than this man?”

I was about to reply when I heard a sound of footsteps outside, and before I could speak old Masey entered the room, in haste and disorder.

I was about to reply when I heard footsteps outside, and before I could say anything, old Masey rushed into the room, all flustered and messy.

“I was just telling this gentleman,” the doctor said: not at the moment observing old Masey’s changed manner: “how you deserted me to go over to your present master.”

“I was just telling this guy,” the doctor said, not really noticing old Masey’s changed demeanor at that moment, “how you left me to join your current boss.”

“Ah! sir,” the man answered, in a troubled voice, “I’m afraid he won’t be my master long.”

“Ah! sir,” the man replied, his voice filled with concern, “I’m afraid he won’t be my boss for long.”

The doctor was on his legs in a moment.  “What!  Is he worse?”

The doctor was on his feet in an instant. “What! Is he doing worse?”

“I think, sir, he is dying,” said the old man.

“I think, sir, he’s dying,” said the old man.

“Come with me, sir; you may be of use if you can keep quiet.”  The doctor caught up his hat as he addressed me in those words, and in a few minutes we had reached The Compensation House.  A few seconds more, and we were standing in a darkened room on the first floor, and I saw lying on a bed before me—pale, emaciated, and, as it seemed, dying—the man whose story I had just heard.

“Come with me, sir; you might be helpful if you can stay quiet.” The doctor grabbed his hat as he said this to me, and a few minutes later we arrived at The Compensation House. Just seconds later, we were standing in a darkened room on the first floor, and I saw lying on a bed in front of me—pale, thin, and, as it looked, dying—the man whose story I had just heard.

He was lying with closed eyes when we came into the room, and I had leisure to examine his p. 148features.  What a tale of misery they told!  They were regular and symmetrical in their arrangement, and not without beauty—the beauty of exceeding refinement and delicacy.  Force there was none, and perhaps it was to the want of this that the faults—perhaps the crime—which had made the man’s life so miserable were to be attributed.  Perhaps the crime?  Yes, it was not likely that an affliction, lifelong and terrible, such as this he had endured, would come upon him unless some misdeed had provoked the punishment.  What misdeed we were soon to know.

He was lying there with his eyes closed when we entered the room, giving me time to study his p. 148features. What a story of suffering they revealed! They were well-proportioned and symmetrical, and not without a certain beauty—the beauty of extreme refinement and delicacy. There was no hint of strength, and perhaps it was this lack that could explain the faults—maybe even the wrongdoing—that had made his life so miserable. Maybe even the wrongdoing? Yes, it seemed unlikely that he would face such a lifelong and terrible affliction without some misdeed provoking the punishment. We were about to find out what that misdeed was.

It sometimes—I think generally—happens that the presence of any one who stands and watches beside a sleeping man will wake him, unless his slumbers are unusually heavy.  It was so now.  While we looked at him, the sleeper awoke very suddenly, and fixed his eyes upon us.  He put out his hand and took the doctor’s in its feeble grasp.  “Who is that?” he asked next, pointing towards me.

It often happens—usually, I’d say—that if someone stands and watches over a sleeping person, it will wake them up, unless they’re in a really deep sleep. That’s what happened now. While we were watching him, the sleeper suddenly woke up and looked right at us. He reached out and took the doctor’s hand in his weak grip. “Who is that?” he then asked, pointing at me.

“Do you wish him to go?  The gentleman knows something of your sufferings, and is powerfully interested in your case; but he will leave us, if you wish it,” the doctor said.

“Do you want him to go? The gentleman understands some of your struggles and is very invested in your situation; but he’ll leave us if that’s what you want,” the doctor said.

“No.  Let him stay.”

“No. Let him stay.”

Seating myself out of sight, but where I could both see and hear what passed, I waited for what should follow.  Dr. Garden and John p. 149Masey stood beside the bed.  There was a moment’s pause.

Seating myself where I couldn't be seen, but could still see and hear everything that happened, I waited for what would come next. Dr. Garden and John p. 149Masey were standing next to the bed. There was a brief moment of silence.

“I want a looking-glass,” said Strange, without a word of preface.

“I want a mirror,” said Strange, without any introduction.

We all started to hear him say those words.  “I am dying,” said Strange; “will you not grant me my request?”

We all began to hear him say those words. “I’m dying,” Strange said; “will you not grant me my request?”

Doctor Garden whispered to old Masey; and the latter left the room.  He was not absent long, having gone no further than the next house.  He held an oval-framed mirror in his hand when he returned.  A shudder passed through the body of the sick man as he saw it.

Doctor Garden whispered to old Masey, who then left the room. He wasn't gone long, just to the next house. He came back holding an oval-framed mirror. A shiver ran through the sick man's body when he saw it.

“Put it down,” he said, faintly—“anywhere—for the present.”

“Put it down,” he said softly, “anywhere—for now.”

No one of us spoke.  I do not think, in that moment of suspense, that we could, any of us, have spoken if we had tried.

No one of us said a word. I don’t think, in that moment of tension, any of us could have spoken even if we’d tried.

The sick man tried to raise himself a little.  “Prop me up,” he said.  “I speak with difficulty—I have something to say.”

The sick man tried to lift himself a bit. “Help me sit up,” he said. “I'm having trouble speaking—I have something to say.”

They put pillows behind him, so as to raise his head and body.

They propped pillows behind him to elevate his head and body.

“I have presently a use for it,” he said, indicating the mirror.  “I want to see—”  He stopped, and seemed to change his mind.  He was sparing of his words.  “I want to tell you—all about it.”  Again he was silent.  Then he seemed to make a great effort and spoke once more, beginning very abruptly.

“I currently have a use for it,” he said, pointing to the mirror. “I want to see—” He paused and appeared to reconsider. He was careful with his words. “I want to tell you—everything about it.” Again, he fell silent. Then he seemed to make a strong effort and spoke again, starting very suddenly.

p. 150“I loved my wife fondly.  I loved her—her name was Lucy.  She was English; but, after we were married, we lived long abroad—in Italy.  She liked the country, and I liked what she liked.  She liked to draw, too, and I got her a master.  He was an Italian.  I will not give his name.  We always called him ‘the Master.’  A treacherous insidious man this was, and, under cover of his profession, took advantage of his opportunities, and taught my wife to love him—to love him.

p. 150“I loved my wife dearly. I loved her—her name was Lucy. She was English, but after we got married, we spent a lot of time abroad—in Italy. She enjoyed the country, and I liked what she liked. She also loved to draw, so I hired a tutor for her. He was Italian. I won’t give his name. We always referred to him as ‘the Master.’ He was a deceitful and cunning man, and under the guise of his profession, he took advantage of his position and made my wife fall in love with him—to love him.

“I am short of breath.  I need not enter into details as to how I found them out; but I did find them out.  We were away on a sketching expedition when I made my discovery.  My rage maddened me, and there was one at hand who fomented my madness.  My wife had a maid, who, it seemed, had also loved this man—the Master—and had been ill treated and deserted by him.  She told me all.  She had played the part of go-between—had carried letters.  When she told me these things, it was night, in a solitary Italian town, among the mountains.  ‘He is in his room now,’ she said, ‘writing to her.’

“I can’t catch my breath. I don't need to go into details about how I found out, but I did find out. We were away on a sketching trip when I made my discovery. My anger drove me wild, and there was someone nearby who fueled my rage. My wife had a maid who, it turned out, had also been in love with this man—the Master—and had been mistreated and abandoned by him. She told me everything. She had acted as a go-between—had delivered letters. When she shared this with me, it was nighttime in a quiet Italian town, nestled among the mountains. ‘He’s in his room right now,’ she said, ‘writing to her.’”

“A frenzy took possession of me as I listened to those words.  I am naturally vindictive—remember that—and now my longing for revenge was like a thirst.  Travelling in those lonely regions, I was armed, and when the woman said, ‘He is writing to your wife,’ p. 151I laid hold of my pistols, as by an instinct.  It has been some comfort to me since, that I took them both.  Perhaps, at that moment, I may have meant fairly by him—meant that we should fight.  I don’t know what I meant, quite.  The woman’s words, ‘He is in his own room now, writing to her,’ rung in my ears.”

“A frenzy took over me as I listened to those words. I am naturally vindictive—keep that in mind—and now my desire for revenge felt like a thirst. Traveling through those lonely areas, I was armed, and when the woman said, ‘He is writing to your wife,’ p. 151I instinctively reached for my pistols. It’s been some comfort to me since that I grabbed both of them. Maybe, at that moment, I intended to be fair with him—intended for us to fight. I’m not really sure what I meant. The woman’s words, ‘He is in his own room now, writing to her,’ echoed in my ears.”

The sick man stopped to take breath.  It seemed an hour, though it was probably not more than two minutes, before he spoke again.

The sick man paused to catch his breath. It felt like an hour, even though it was probably only two minutes, before he spoke again.

“I managed to get into his room unobserved.  Indeed, he was altogether absorbed in what he was doing.  He was sitting at the only table in the room, writing at a travelling-desk, by the light of a single candle.  It was a rude dressing-table, and—and before him—exactly before him—there was—there was a looking-glass.

“I was able to sneak into his room without being noticed. He was completely focused on what he was doing. He was sitting at the only table in the room, writing at a portable desk, illuminated by the light of a single candle. It was a rough dressing table, and—right in front of him—there was—a mirror.”

“I stole up behind him as he sat and wrote by the light of the candle.  I looked over his shoulder at the letter, and I read, ‘Dearest Lucy, my love, my darling.’  As I read the words, I pulled the trigger of the pistol I held in my right hand, and killed him—killed him—but, before he died, he looked up once—not at me, but at my image before him in the glass, and his face—such a face—has been there—ever since, and mine—my face—is gone!”

“I sneaked up behind him while he was writing by candlelight. I glanced over his shoulder at the letter and read, ‘Dearest Lucy, my love, my darling.’ As I absorbed those words, I pulled the trigger of the pistol I was holding in my right hand and shot him—shot him—but before he died, he looked up once—not at me, but at my reflection in the glass, and his face—what a face—has haunted me ever since, and mine—my face—is gone!”

He fell back exhausted, and we all pressed forward thinking that he must be dead, he lay so still.

He collapsed, completely drained, and we all moved ahead, believing he had to be dead since he was so motionless.

p. 152But he had not yet passed away.  He revived under the influence of stimulants.  He tried to speak, and muttered indistinctly from time to time words of which we could sometimes make no sense.  We understood, however, that he had been tried by an Italian tribunal, and had been found guilty; but with such extenuating circumstances that his sentence was commuted to imprisonment, during, we thought we made out, two years.  But we could not understand what he said about his wife, though we gathered that she was still alive, from something he whispered to the doctor of there being provision made for her in his will.

p. 152But he hadn't passed away yet. He came back to consciousness thanks to some stimulants. He tried to speak and occasionally mumbled words that sometimes made no sense to us. We understood, however, that he had been tried by an Italian court and found guilty; but due to some mitigating circumstances, his sentence was reduced to two years in prison, as we thought we understood. However, we couldn't grasp what he said about his wife, though we gathered that she was still alive from something he whispered to the doctor about having made provisions for her in his will.

He lay in a doze for something more than an hour after he had told his tale, and then he woke up quite suddenly, as he had done when we had first entered the room.  He looked round uneasily in all directions, until his eye fell on the looking-glass.

He dozed for a little over an hour after sharing his story, then woke up abruptly, just like when we first entered the room. He scanned the area nervously before his gaze landed on the mirror.

“I want it,” he said, hastily; but I noticed that he did not shudder now, as it was brought near.  When old Masey approached, holding it in his hand, and crying like a child, Dr. Garden came forward and stood between him and his master, taking the hand of poor Strange in his.

“I want it,” he said quickly; but I noticed he didn’t flinch now as it was brought closer. When old Masey came near, holding it in his hand and crying like a child, Dr. Garden stepped in and stood between him and his master, holding the hand of poor Strange in his.

“Is this wise?” he asked.  “Is it good, do you think, to revive this misery of your life now, when it is so near its close?  The chastisement of your crime,” he added, solemnly, “has p. 153been a terrible one.  Let us hope in God’s mercy that your punishment is over.”

“Is this wise?” he asked. “Do you think it’s a good idea to bring back this pain in your life now, when it's so close to the end? The consequences of your actions,” he added seriously, “have been harsh. Let’s hope for God’s mercy that your suffering is finished.”

The dying man raised himself with a last great effort, and looked up at the doctor with such an expression on his face as none of us had seen on any face, before.

The dying man propped himself up with one final push and looked up at the doctor with an expression we'd never seen on anyone's face before.

“I do hope so,” he said, faintly, “but you must let me have my way in this—for if, now, when I look, I see aright—once more—I shall then hope yet more strongly—for I shall take it as a sign.”

“I really hope so,” he said softly, “but you have to let me do this my way—because if, right now, when I look, I see correctly—once again—I will then hope even more strongly—since I will take it as a sign.”

The doctor stood aside without another word, when he heard the dying man speak thus, and the old servant drew near, and, stooping over softly, held the looking-glass before his master.  Presently afterwards, we, who stood around looking breathlessly at him, saw such a rapture upon his face, as left no doubt upon our minds that the face which had haunted him so long, had, in his last hour, disappeared.

The doctor stepped aside without saying anything else when he heard the dying man speak. The old servant came closer and gently held the mirror up for his master. Shortly after, we, who were gathered around him, saw such joy on his face that there was no doubt in our minds that the face that had tormented him for so long had finally vanished in his last moments.

p. 154No. 4 BRANCH LINE
THE TRAVELLING POST-OFFICE

Many years ago, and before this Line was so much as projected, I was engaged as a clerk in a Travelling Post-office running along the Line of railway from London to a town in the Midland Counties, which we will call Fazeley.  My duties were to accompany the mail-train which left Fazeley at 8.15 p.m., and arrived in London about midnight, and to return by the day mail leaving London at 10.30 the following morning, after which I had an unbroken night at Fazeley, while another clerk discharged the same round of work; and in this way each alternative evening I was on duty in the railway post-office van.  At first I suffered a little from a hurry and tremor of nerve in pursuing my occupation while the train was crashing along under bridges and through tunnels at a speed which was then thought marvellous and perilous; but it was not long before my hands and eyes p. 155became accustomed to the motion of the carriage, and I could go through my business with the same despatch and ease as in the post-office of the country town where I had learned it, and from which I had been promoted by the influence of the surveyor of the district, Mr. Huntingdon.  In fact, the work soon fell into a monotonous routine, which, night after night, was pursued in an unbroken course by myself and the junior clerk, who was my only assistant: the railway post-office work not having then attained the importance and magnitude it now possesses.

Many years ago, even before this route was planned, I worked as a clerk in a traveling post office that operated along the railway from London to a town in the Midlands, which we'll call Fazeley. My job was to ride the mail train that left Fazeley at 8:15 PM and arrived in London around midnight, then return on the day mail leaving London at 10:30 the next morning. After that, I had an uninterrupted night in Fazeley while another clerk took over the same duties. This way, every other evening, I was on duty in the railway post office van. At first, I felt a bit anxious and jittery doing my job while the train sped beneath bridges and through tunnels at a speed that was considered amazing and dangerous at the time. But it didn't take long for my hands and eyes p. 155to adjust to the motion of the carriage, and I was able to perform my tasks with the same speed and ease as in the small-town post office where I had learned the job and from which I was promoted thanks to the district surveyor, Mr. Huntingdon. In fact, the work soon settled into a monotonous routine that I and the junior clerk, my only assistant, followed night after night, as the railway post office work hadn't reached the level of importance and scale it has today.

Our route lay through an agricultural district containing many small towns, which made up two or three bags only; one for London; another perhaps for the county town; a third for the railway post-office, to be opened by us, and the enclosures to be distributed according to their various addresses.  The clerks in many of these small offices were women, as is very generally the case still, being the daughters and female relatives of the nominal postmaster, who transact most of the business of the office, and whose names are most frequently signed upon the bills accompanying the bags.  I was a young man, and somewhat more curious in feminine handwriting than I am now.  There was one family in particular, whom I had never seen, but with whose signatures I was perfectly familiar—clear, p. 156delicate, and educated, very unlike the miserable scrawl upon other letter-bills.  One New Year’s-eve, in a moment of sentiment, I tied a slip of paper among a bundle of letters for their office, upon which I had written, “A happy New Year to you all.”  The next evening brought me a return of my good wishes, signed, as I guessed, by three sisters of the name of Clifton.  From that day, every now and then, a sentence or two as brief as the one above passed between us, and the feeling of acquaintance and friendship grew upon me, though I had never yet had an opportunity of seeing my fair unknown friends.

Our route took us through an agricultural area with lots of small towns, which accounted for just a few bags: one for London, another maybe for the county town, and a third for the railway post-office, which we would open, with the contents distributed based on their different addresses. The clerks in many of these small offices were women, as is still quite common, being the daughters and female relatives of the postmaster, who handled most of the office work, and whose names were often signed on the bills that came with the bags. I was a young man and somewhat more interested in feminine handwriting than I am now. There was one family in particular that I had never met, but whose signatures I recognized perfectly—clear, delicate, and educated, very different from the messy scrawl on other letter-bills. One New Year’s Eve, feeling sentimental, I tied a slip of paper among a stack of letters for their office, writing, “A happy New Year to you all.” The next evening, I received a return of my good wishes, signed, as I suspected, by three sisters named Clifton. From that day on, occasionally a sentence or two as brief as my first message passed between us, and the feeling of familiarity and friendship grew on me, even though I had yet to meet my lovely unknown friends.

It was towards the close of the following October that it came under my notice that the then Premier of the ministry was paying an autumn visit to a nobleman, whose country seat was situated near a small village on our line of rail.  The Premier’s despatch-box, containing, of course, all the despatches which it was necessary to send down to him, passed between him and the Secretary of State, and was, as usual, entrusted to the care of the post-office.  The Continent was just then in a more than ordinarily critical state; we were thought to be upon the verge of an European war; and there were murmurs floating about, at the dispersion of the ministry up and down the country.  These circumstances made the p. 157charge of the despatch-box the more interesting to me.  It was very similar in size and shape to the old-fashioned workboxes used by ladies before boxes of polished and ornamental wood came into vogue, and, like them, it was covered with red morocco leather, and it fastened with a lock and key.  The first time it came into my hands I took such special notice of it as might be expected.  Upon one corner of the lid I detected a peculiar device scratched slightly upon it, most probably with the sharp point of a steel pen, in such a moment of preoccupation of mind as causes most of us to draw odd lines and caricatured faces upon any piece of paper which may lie under our hand.  It was the old revolutionary device of a heart with a dagger piercing it; and I wondered whether it could be the Premier, or one of his secretaries, who had traced it upon the morocco.

It was towards the end of the following October that I noticed the Premier was making an autumn visit to a nobleman whose estate was near a small village along our railway line. The Premier’s despatch-box, which contained all the important documents that needed to be sent to him, passed back and forth between him and the Secretary of State, and was, as usual, entrusted to the post-office. At that time, the situation in Europe was particularly tense; we were thought to be on the brink of a war, and there were whispers about the ministry being dissolved across the country. These factors made the handling of the despatch-box all the more intriguing to me. It was about the same size and shape as the old-fashioned workboxes that ladies used before polished and decorative wooden boxes became popular, and, like them, it was covered in red morocco leather and fastened with a lock and key. The first time I held it, I took note of it as you might expect. On one corner of the lid, I noticed a peculiar design lightly scratched into it, likely made with the sharp point of a steel pen during a moment of distraction, when many of us doodle odd lines and cartoonish faces on whatever paper is in front of us. It was the classic revolutionary symbol of a heart pierced by a dagger, and I wondered whether it was the Premier or one of his secretaries who had traced it onto the morocco.

This box had been travelling up and down for about ten days, and, as the village did not make up a bag for London, there being very few letters excepting those from the great house, the letter-bag from the house, and the despatch-box, were handed direct into our travelling post-office.  But in compliment to the presence of the Premier in the neighbourhood, the train, instead of slackening speed only, stopped altogether, in order that the Premier’s trusty and confidential messenger p. 158might deliver the important box into my own hands, that its perfect safety might be ensured.  I had an undefined suspicion that some person was also employed to accompany the train up to London, for three or four times I had met with a foreign-looking gentleman at Euston-square, standing at the door of the carriage nearest the post-office van, and eyeing the heavy bags as they were transferred from my care to the custody of the officials from the General Post-office.  But though I felt amused and somewhat nettled at this needless precaution, I took no further notice of the man, except to observe that he had the swarthy aspect of a foreigner, and that he kept his face well away from the light of the lamps.  Except for these things, and after the first time or two, the Premier’s despatch-box interested me no more than any other part of my charge.  My work had been doubly monotonous for some time past, and I began to think it time to get up some little entertainment with my unknown friends, the Cliftons.  I was just thinking of it as the train stopped at the station about a mile from the town where they lived, and their postman, a gruff matter-of-fact fellow—you could see it in every line of his face—put in the letter-bags, and with them a letter addressed to me.  It was in an official envelope, “On Her Majesty’s Service,” and the seal was an official seal.  On p. 159the folded paper inside it (folded officially also) I read the following order: “Mr. Wilcox is requested to permit the bearer, the daughter of the postmaster at Eaton, to see the working of the railway post-office during the up-journey.”  The writing I knew well as being that of one of the surveyor’s clerks, and the signature was Mr. Huntingdon’s.  The bearer of the order presented herself at the door, the snorting of the engine gave notice of the instant departure of the train, I held out my hand, the young lady sprang lightly and deftly into the van, and we were off again on our midnight journey.

This box had been traveling up and down for about ten days, and since the village didn’t organize a bag for London, there were very few letters other than those from the big house. The letter-bag from the house and the despatch-box were handed directly into our traveling post-office. But to honor the presence of the Prime Minister in the area, the train didn’t just slow down; it stopped completely so that the Prime Minister's trusted messenger could deliver the important box directly into my hands to ensure its perfect safety. I had a vague suspicion that someone was also hired to accompany the train to London because three or four times I had seen a foreign-looking guy at Euston Square, standing by the door of the carriage closest to the post-office van, watching the heavy bags as they were transferred from my care to the officials from the General Post Office. Although I felt amused and slightly annoyed by this unnecessary precaution, I didn’t pay much attention to the man other than noting that he had the dark complexion of a foreigner and that he kept his face away from the light of the lamps. Aside from these observations, after the first couple of times, the Prime Minister’s despatch-box interested me no more than any other part of my responsibilities. My work had been doubly monotonous for a while, and I started to think it was time to create a little entertainment with my unknown friends, the Cliftons. Just as I was considering this, the train stopped at the station about a mile from the town where they lived, and their postman, a gruff and practical guy—you could see it in every line of his face—put in the letter-bags, along with a letter addressed to me. It was in an official envelope marked “On Her Majesty’s Service,” and the seal was an official one. Inside the folded paper (officially folded as well), I read the following order: “Mr. Wilcox is requested to allow the bearer, the daughter of the postmaster at Eaton, to observe the workings of the railway post-office during the upward journey.” I recognized the handwriting as that of one of the surveyor’s clerks, and the signature was Mr. Huntingdon’s. The bearer of the order appeared at the door, the engine let out a snort as a signal of the train's immediate departure, I extended my hand, the young lady jumped lightly and nimbly into the van, and we were off again on our midnight journey.

She was a small slight creature, one of those slender little girls one never thinks of as being a woman, dressed neatly and plainly in a dark dress, with a veil hanging a little over her face and tied under her chin: the most noticeable thing about her appearance being a great mass of light hair, almost yellow, which had got loose in some way, and fell down her neck in thick wavy tresses.  She had a free pleasant way about her, not in the least bold or forward, which in a minute or two made her presence seem the most natural thing in the world.  As she stood beside me before the row of boxes into which I was sorting my letters, she asked questions and I answered as if it were quite an every-day occurrence for us to be travelling up together in the night mail p. 160to Euston-square station.  I blamed myself for an idiot that I had not sooner made an opportunity for visiting my unknown friends at Eaton.

She was a small, delicate girl, the kind you wouldn’t immediately think of as a woman, dressed simply and neatly in a dark dress, with a veil hanging a bit over her face and tied under her chin. The most striking thing about her appearance was a mass of light, almost yellow hair that had somehow loosened and fell in thick, wavy strands down her neck. She had a relaxed, friendly vibe, not at all bold or forward, which quickly made her presence feel completely natural. As she stood next to me in front of the row of boxes where I was sorting my letters, she asked questions, and I answered as if it were just an ordinary thing for us to be traveling together on the night mail to Euston-square station. I accused myself of being an idiot for not finding a way to visit my unknown friends at Eaton sooner.

“Then,” I said, putting down the letter-bill from their own office before her, “may I ask which of the signatures I know so well, is yours?  Is it A. Clifton, or M. Clifton, or S. Clifton?”  She hesitated a little, and blushed, and lifted up her frank childlike eyes to mine.

“Then,” I said, putting down the letter-bill from their own office in front of her, “can I ask which of the signatures I recognize so well is yours? Is it A. Clifton, M. Clifton, or S. Clifton?” She paused for a moment, turned red, and raised her honest, childlike eyes to mine.

“I am A. Clifton,” she answered.

"I'm A. Clifton," she said.

“And your name?” I said.

“And what’s your name?” I asked.

“Anne;” then, as if anxious to give some explanation to me of her present position, she added, “I was going up to London on a visit, and I thought it would be so nice to travel in the post-office to see how the work was done, and Mr. Huntingdon came to survey our office, and he said he would send me an order.”

“Anne,” she said, seeming eager to explain her current situation. “I was heading to London for a visit, and I thought it would be great to take the post-office route to see how things worked. Mr. Huntingdon came to check out our office, and he said he would send me an order.”

I felt somewhat surprised, for a stricter martinet than Mr. Huntingdon did not breathe; but I glanced down at the small innocent face at my side, and cordially approved of his departure from ordinary rules.

I felt a bit surprised, since no one was stricter than Mr. Huntingdon; but I looked down at the small innocent face next to me and fully approved of his breaking the usual rules.

“Did you know you would travel with me?” I asked, in a lower voice; for Tom Morville, my junior, was at my other elbow.

“Did you know you would be traveling with me?” I asked, in a softer voice, since Tom Morville, my junior, was at my other side.

“I knew I should travel with Mr. Wilcox,” p. 161she answered, with a smile that made all my nerves tingle.

“I knew I should travel with Mr. Wilcox,” p. 161she replied, her smile making all my nerves tingle.

“You have not written me a word for ages,” said I, reproachfully.

“You haven't written me a word in ages,” I said, disappointed.

“You had better not talk, or you’ll be making mistakes,” she replied, in an arch tone.  It was quite true; for, a sudden confusion coming over me, I was sorting the letters at random.

“You should probably keep quiet, or you’ll mess things up,” she replied in a sarcastic tone. It was definitely true; I was suddenly confused and sorting the letters randomly.

We were just then approaching the small station where the letter-bag from the great house was taken up.  The engine was slackening speed.  Miss Clifton manifested some natural and becoming diffidence.

We were just approaching the small station where the letter bag from the big house was picked up. The engine was slowing down. Miss Clifton showed some natural and fitting shyness.

“It would look so odd,” she said, “to any one on the platform, to see a girl in the post-office van!  And they couldn’t know I was a postmaster’s daughter, and had an order from Mr. Huntingdon.  Is there no dark corner to shelter me?”

“It would look so strange,” she said, “to anyone on the platform, to see a girl in the post-office van! And they wouldn’t know I was the postmaster’s daughter and had an order from Mr. Huntingdon. Is there no dark corner to hide me?”

I must explain to you in a word or two the construction of the van, which was much less efficiently fitted up than the travelling post-offices of the present day.  It was a reversible van, with a door at each right-hand corner.  At each door the letter-boxes were so arranged as to form a kind of screen about two feet in width, which prevented people from seeing all over the carriage at once.  Thus the door at the far end of the van, the one not in use at the time, was thrown into deep shadow, and p. 162the screen before it turned it into a small niche, where a slight little person like Miss Clifton was very well concealed from curious eyes.  Before the train came within the light from the lamps on the platform, she ensconced herself in this shelter.  No one but I could see her laughing face, as she stood there leaning cautiously forward with her finger pressed upon her rosy lips, peeping at the messenger who delivered into my own hands the Premier’s despatch-box, while Tom Morville received the letter-bag of the great house.

I need to quickly explain how the van was built, which was way less efficient than today's traveling post-offices. It was a reversible van with a door at each right-hand corner. At each door, the letterboxes were set up to create a kind of screen about two feet wide, blocking the view of the entire carriage at once. This meant that the door at the far end of the van, the one not being used, was in deep shadow, and the screen in front of it made it like a small nook, where someone as petite as Miss Clifton could easily hide from prying eyes. Before the train got into the light from the lamps on the platform, she settled herself in this spot. Only I could see her smiling face as she leaned forward carefully, her finger pressed against her rosy lips, watching the messenger who handed the Premier’s despatch-box to me while Tom Morville took the letter-bag from the great house.

“See,” I said, when we were again in motion, and she had emerged from her concealment, “this is the Premier’s despatch-box, going back to the Secretary of State.  There are some state secrets for you, and ladies are fond of secrets.”

“Look,” I said, once we were moving again and she had come out of hiding, “this is the Premier’s dispatch box, going back to the Secretary of State. There are some state secrets for you, and women love secrets.”

“Oh! I know nothing about politics,” she answered, indifferently, “and we have had that box through our office a time or two.”

“Oh! I know nothing about politics,” she replied, casually, “and we've had that box come through our office a couple of times.”

“Did you ever notice this mark upon it,” I asked—“a heart with a dagger through it?” and bending down my face to hers, I added a certain spooney remark, which I do not care to repeat.  Miss Clifton tossed her little head, and pouted her lips; but she took the box out of my hands, and carried it to the lamp nearest the further end of the van, after which she put it down upon the counter close beside the screen, and I thought no more about it.  The p. 163midnight ride was entertaining in the extreme, for the girl was full of young life and sauciness and merry humour.  I can safely aver that I have never been to an evening’s so-called entertainment which, to me, was half so enjoyable.  It added also to the zest and keen edge of the enjoyment to see her hasten to hide herself whenever I told her we were going to stop to take up the mails.

“Did you ever notice this mark on it,” I asked—“a heart with a dagger through it?” Leaning down closer to her, I made a sort of cheesy remark that I don’t want to repeat. Miss Clifton tossed her little head and pouted her lips, but she took the box from my hands and went to the lamp at the far end of the van. Then she set it down on the counter right next to the screen, and I didn’t think about it anymore. The p. 163midnight ride was incredibly fun because the girl was full of youthful energy, sass, and humor. I can honestly say I’ve never been to a night’s entertainment that was half as enjoyable for me. It also made the experience even more exciting to see her rush to hide every time I told her we were going to stop to pick up the mail.

“We had passed Watford, the last station at which we stopped, before I became alive to the recollection that our work was terribly behindhand.  Miss Clifton also became grave, and sat at the end of the counter very quiet and subdued, as if her frolic were over, and it was possible she might find something to repent of in it.  I had told her we should stop no more until we reached Euston-square station, but to my surprise I felt our speed decreasing, and our train coming to a standstill.  I looked out and called to the guard in the van behind, who told me he supposed there was something on the line before us, and that we should go on in a minute or two.  I turned my head, and gave this information to my fellow-clerk and Miss Clifton.

“We had passed Watford, the last station where we stopped, before I realized that we were seriously behind schedule. Miss Clifton also grew serious and sat quietly at the end of the counter, as if her fun was over and she might have something to regret. I had told her we wouldn't stop again until we got to Euston-square station, but to my surprise, I felt our speed slowing down, and our train came to a halt. I looked out and shouted to the guard in the carriage behind, who told me he thought there was something blocking the track ahead and that we’d move in a minute or two. I turned my head and shared this info with my fellow clerk and Miss Clifton.”

“Do you know where we are?” she asked, in a frightened tone.

“Do you know where we are?” she asked, sounding scared.

“At Camden-town,” I replied.  She sprang hastily from her seat, and came towards me.

“At Camden-town,” I said. She quickly got up from her seat and came over to me.

“I am close to my friend’s house here,” she p. 164said, “so it is a lucky thing for me.  It is not five minutes’ walk from the station.  I will say good-bye to you now, Mr. Wilcox, and I thank you a thousand times for your kindness.”

“I’m really close to my friend’s place,” she p. 164said, “so it’s a lucky break for me. It’s only a five-minute walk from the station. I’ll say goodbye to you now, Mr. Wilcox, and I can’t thank you enough for your kindness.”

She seemed flurried, and she held out both her little hands to me in an appealing kind of way, as if she were afraid of my detaining her against her will.  I took them both into mine, pressing them with rather more ardour than was quite necessary.

She looked flustered, and she extended both her small hands toward me in an appealing manner, as if she were worried I might keep her from leaving. I took her hands in mine, squeezing them with a bit more intensity than really needed.

“I do not like you to go alone at this hour,” I said, “but there is no help for it.  It has been a delightful time to me.  Will you allow me to call upon you to-morrow morning early, for I leave London at 10.30; or on Wednesday, when I shall be in town again?”

“I don’t like the idea of you going out alone at this hour,” I said, “but there’s nothing we can do about it. I’ve really enjoyed our time together. Can I come by to see you early tomorrow morning? I’m leaving London at 10:30, or I could stop by on Wednesday when I’m back in town.”

“O,” she answered, hanging her head, “I don’t know.  I’ll write and tell mamma how kind you have been, and, and—but I must go, Mr. Wilcox.”

“O,” she replied, looking down, “I don’t know. I’ll write and let Mom know how kind you’ve been, and, and—but I have to go, Mr. Wilcox.”

“I don’t like your going alone,” I repeated.

“I don’t like you going alone,” I repeated.

“O! I know the way perfectly,” she said, in the same flurried manner, “perfectly, thank you.  And it is close at hand.  Goodbye.”

“O! I know the way perfectly,” she said, in the same flustered manner, “perfectly, thank you. And it’s nearby. Goodbye.”

She jumped lightly out of the carriage, and the train started on again at the same instant.  We were busy enough, as you may suppose.  In five minutes more we should be in Euston-square, and there was nearly fifteen minutes’ p. 165work still to be done.  Spite of the enjoyment he had afforded me, I mentally anathematised Mr. Huntingdon and his departure from ordinary rules, and, thrusting Miss Clifton forcibly out of my thoughts, I set to work with a will, gathered up the registered letters for London, tied them into a bundle with the paper bill, and then turned to the corner of the counter for the despatch-box.

She jumped out of the carriage, and the train started moving again at the same moment. We were busy enough, as you can imagine. In just five more minutes we would be at Euston Square, and there was still almost fifteen minutes’ p. 165work left to do. Despite the enjoyment he had given me, I mentally cursed Mr. Huntingdon for breaking the usual rules, and, pushing Miss Clifton out of my mind, I got to work, gathered the registered letters for London, tied them into a bundle with the paper bill, and then turned to the corner of the counter for the dispatch box.

You have guessed already my cursed misfortune.  The Premier’s despatch-box was not there.  For the first minute or so I was in nowise alarmed, and merely looked round, upon the floor, under the bags, into the boxes, into any place into which it could have fallen or been deposited.  We reached Euston-square while I was still searching, and losing more and more of my composure every instant.  Tom Morville joined me in my quest, and felt every bag which had been made up and sealed.  The box was no small article which could go into little compass; it was certainly twelve inches long, and more than that in girth.  But it turned up nowhere.  I never felt nearer fainting than at that moment.

You’ve already guessed my terrible luck. The Premier’s dispatch box was missing. At first, I wasn’t too worried; I just looked around—on the floor, under the bags, into the boxes, anywhere it could have fallen or been put. We got to Euston Square while I was still searching, and I was losing my composure more and more with every passing second. Tom Morville helped me look, checking every bag that had been packed and sealed. The box wasn’t small; it was definitely twelve inches long and even larger around. But it was nowhere to be found. I’ve never felt closer to fainting than I did at that moment.

“Could Miss Clifton have carried it off?” suggested Tom Morville.

“Do you think Miss Clifton could have handled it?” suggested Tom Morville.

“No,” I said, indignantly but thoughtfully, “she couldn’t have carried off such a bulky thing as that, without our seeing it.  It would not go into one of our pockets, Tom, and she p. 166wore a tight-fitting jacket that would not conceal anything.”

“No,” I said, angrily but thoughtfully, “she couldn’t have sneaked away with something that big without us noticing. It wouldn’t fit in any of our pockets, Tom, and she wore a tight jacket that wouldn’t hide anything.” p. 166

“No, she can’t have it,” assented Tom; “then it must be somewhere about.”  We searched again and again, turning over everything in the van, but without success.  The Premier’s despatch-box was gone; and all we could do at first was to stand and stare at one another.  Our trance of blank dismay was of short duration, for the van was assailed by the postmen from St. Martin’s-le-Grand, who were waiting for our charge.  In a stupor of bewilderment we completed our work, and delivered up the mails; then, once more we confronted one another with pale faces, frightened out of our seven senses.  All the scrapes we had ever been in (and we had had our usual share of errors and blunders) faded into utter insignificance compared with this.  My eye fell upon Mr. Huntingdon’s order lying among some scraps of waste paper on the floor, and I picked it up, and put it carefully, with its official envelope, into my pocket.

“No, she can’t have it,” Tom agreed; “then it must be somewhere around.” We searched again and again, checking everything in the van, but without success. The Premier’s dispatch box was missing; all we could do at first was stand and stare at each other. Our moment of pure shock didn’t last long, though, because the postmen from St. Martin’s-le-Grand came to collect our delivery. Still bewildered, we finished our task and handed over the mail; then we faced each other again with pale faces, completely rattled. All the troubles we’d ever been in (and we had had our fair share of mistakes) seemed trivial compared to this. My eyes landed on Mr. Huntingdon’s order lying among some scraps of paper on the floor, and I picked it up, carefully placing it, with its official envelope, into my pocket.

“We can’t stay here,” said Tom.  The porters were looking in inquisitively; we were seldom so long in quitting our empty van.

“We can’t stay here,” Tom said. The porters were looking in curiously; we rarely took this long to leave our empty van.

“No,” I replied, a sudden gleam of sense darting across the blank bewilderment of my brain; “no, we must go to head-quarters at p. 167once, and make a clean breast of it.  This is no private business, Tom.”

“No,” I replied, a sudden spark of understanding cutting through the confusion in my head; “no, we need to go to headquarters at p. 167right away, and be honest about everything. This isn’t just a personal matter, Tom.”

We made one more ineffectual search, and then we hailed a cab and drove as hard as we could to the General Post-office.  The secretary of the Post-office was not there, of course, but we obtained the address of his residence in one of the suburbs, four or five miles from the City, and we told no one of our misfortune, my idea being that the fewer who were made acquainted with the loss the better.  My judgment was in the right there.

We did one more pointless search and then grabbed a cab, racing to the General Post Office. The Post Office secretary wasn’t there, of course, but we got his home address in one of the suburbs, four or five miles from downtown. We didn’t mention our setback to anyone because I thought it was best to keep the number of people who knew about the loss to a minimum. I was right about that.

We had to knock up the household of the secretary—a formidable personage with whom I had never been brought into contact before—and in a short time we were holding a strictly private and confidential interview with him, by the glimmer of a solitary candle, just serving to light up his severe face, which changed its expression several times as I narrated the calamity.  It was too stupendous for rebuke, and I fancied his eyes softened with something like commiseration as he gazed upon us.  After a short interval of deliberation, he announced his intention of accompanying us to the residence of the Secretary of State; and in a few minutes we were driving back again to the opposite extremity of London.  It was not far off the hour for the morning delivery of letters when we reached our destination; but the atmosphere was yellow with p. 168fog, and we could see nothing as we passed along in almost utter silence, for neither of us ventured to speak, and the secretary only made a brief remark now and then.  We drove up to some dwelling enveloped in fog, and we were left in the cab for nearly half an hour, while our secretary went in.  At the end of that time we were summoned to an apartment where there was seated at a large desk a small spare man, with a great head, and eyes deeply sunk under the brows.  There was no form of introduction, of course, and we could only guess who he might be; but we were requested to repeat our statement, and a few shrewd questions were put to us by the stranger.  We were eager to put him in possession of everything we knew, but that was little beyond the fact that the despatch-box was lost.

We had to wake up the household of the secretary—a pretty intimidating person I had never interacted with before—and soon we were having a strictly private and confidential conversation with him, illuminated only by a single candle that highlighted his stern face, which changed expressions several times as I shared the disaster. It was too overwhelming for any criticism, and I thought his eyes softened with what seemed like sympathy as he looked at us. After a brief pause to think, he said he would come with us to the residence of the Secretary of State; and a few minutes later, we were driving back across London. It was almost time for the morning mail delivery when we arrived at our destination; however, the air was thick with fog, and we could barely see as we moved along in near silence, neither of us daring to speak, while the secretary only made a few brief comments now and then. We pulled up to a building shrouded in fog, and we sat in the cab for almost half an hour while our secretary went inside. After that time, we were called into a room where a small, thin man with a large head sat at a big desk, his eyes deeply set under his brows. There were no introductions, of course, so we could only guess who he was; but we were asked to repeat our account, and the stranger asked us a few sharp questions. We were eager to share everything we knew, but that was limited to just the fact that the dispatch box was missing.

“That young person must have taken it,” he said.

"That kid must have taken it," he said.

“She could not, sir,” I answered, positively, but deferentially.  “She wore the tightest-fitting pelisse I ever saw, and she gave me both her hands when she said good-bye.  She could not possibly have it concealed about her.  It would not go into my pocket.”

“She couldn't, sir,” I replied, firmly but respectfully. “She wore the tightest-fitting coat I've ever seen, and she gave me both her hands when she said goodbye. She couldn't possibly have it hidden on her. It wouldn't fit in my pocket.”

“How did she come to travel up with you in the van, sir?” he asked severely.

“How did she end up traveling with you in the van, sir?” he asked sternly.

I gave him for answer the order signed by Mr. Huntingdon.  He and our secretary scanned it closely.

I handed him the order signed by Mr. Huntingdon. He and our secretary examined it carefully.

p. 169“It is Huntingdon’s signature without doubt,” said the latter; “I could swear to it anywhere.  This is an extraordinary circumstance!”

p. 169“It’s definitely Huntingdon’s signature,” said the other person; “I would recognize it anywhere. This is an incredible situation!”

It was an extraordinary circumstance.  The two retired into an adjoining room, where they stayed for another half-hour, and when they returned to us their faces still bore an aspect of grave perplexity.

It was an unusual situation. The two went into a nearby room, where they spent another thirty minutes, and when they came back to us, their faces still showed a look of deep confusion.

“Mr. Wilcox and Mr. Morville,” said our secretary, “it is expedient that this affair should be kept inviolably secret.  You must even be careful not to hint that you hold any secret.  You did well not to announce your loss at the Post-office, and I shall cause it to be understood that you had instructions to take the despatch-box direct to its destination.  Your business now is to find the young woman, and return with her not later than six o’clock this afternoon to my office at the General Post-office.  What other steps we think it requisite to take, you need know nothing about; the less you know, the better for yourselves.”

“Mr. Wilcox and Mr. Morville,” said our secretary, “it’s important that this matter stays completely confidential. You must be careful not to even hint that you know anything secretive. You did well not to report your loss at the Post Office, and I’ll make sure it’s understood that you were instructed to take the dispatch box straight to its destination. Your task now is to locate the young woman and return with her to my office at the General Post Office by six o’clock this afternoon. Whatever other actions we deem necessary, you don’t need to know about; the less you know, the better for both of you.”

Another gleam of commiseration in his official eye made our hearts sink within us.  We departed promptly, and, with that instinct of wisdom which at times dictates infallibly what course we should pursue, we decided our line of action.  Tom Morville was to go down to Camden-town, and inquire at every house for Miss Clifton, while I—there would p. 170be just time for it—was to run down to Eaton by train and obtain her exact address from her parents.  We agreed to meet at the General Post-office at half-past five, if I could possibly reach it by that time; but in any case Tom was to report himself to the secretary and account for my absence.

Another look of pity in his official eye made our hearts drop. We left quickly, and, guided by that instinct of wisdom that sometimes clearly tells us what to do, we figured out our plan. Tom Morville was to head over to Camden Town and ask at every house for Miss Clifton, while I—there would p. 170 be just enough time for it—would take the train to Eaton to get her exact address from her parents. We agreed to meet at the General Post Office at 5:30, if I could make it there in time; but in any case, Tom was to check in with the secretary and explain why I wasn’t there.

When I arrived at the station at Eaton, I found that I had only forty-five minutes before the up train went by.  The town was nearly a mile away, but I made all the haste I could to reach it.  I was not surprised to find the post-office in connexion with a bookseller’s shop, and I saw a pleasant elderly lady seated behind the counter, while a tall dark-haired girl was sitting at some work a little out of sight.  I introduced myself at once.

When I got to the station in Eaton, I realized I only had forty-five minutes before the train came through. The town was almost a mile away, but I hurried as much as I could to get there. I wasn't shocked to see the post office connected to a bookstore, and I noticed a nice older woman sitting behind the counter while a tall, dark-haired girl was working a bit out of sight. I introduced myself right away.

“I am Frank Wilcox, of the railway post-office, and I have just run down to Eaton to obtain some information from you.”

“I’m Frank Wilcox from the railway post office, and I just came down to Eaton to get some information from you.”

“Certainly.  We know you well by name,” was the reply, given in a cordial manner, which was particularly pleasant to me.

“Of course. We know you by name,” was the reply, given in a friendly way, which was really nice for me.

“Will you be so good as give me the address of Miss Anne Clifton in Camden-town?” I said.

“Would you be so kind as to give me the address of Miss Anne Clifton in Camden Town?” I asked.

“Miss Anne Clifton?” ejaculated the lady.

“Miss Anne Clifton?” exclaimed the lady.

“Yes.  Your daughter, I presume.  Who went up to London last night.”

“Yes. Your daughter, I assume. Who went to London last night.”

“I have no daughter Anne,” she said; “I am Anne Clifton, and my daughters are named p. 171Mary and Susan.  This is my daughter Mary.”

“I don’t have a daughter named Anne,” she said; “I am Anne Clifton, and my daughters are named p. 171Mary and Susan. This is my daughter Mary.”

The tall dark-haired girl had left her seat, and now stood beside her mother.  Certainly she was very unlike the small golden-haired coquette who had travelled up to London with me as Anne Clifton.

The tall dark-haired girl had left her seat and was now standing next to her mother. She was definitely very different from the small golden-haired flirt who had traveled to London with me as Anne Clifton.

“Madam,” I said, scarcely able to speak, “is your other daughter a slender little creature, exactly the reverse of this young lady?”

“Ma'am,” I said, barely able to speak, “is your other daughter a slim little thing, completely the opposite of this young lady?”

“No,” she answered, laughing; “Susan is both taller and darker than Mary.  Call Susan, my dear.”

“No,” she replied with a laugh; “Susan is both taller and darker than Mary. Call for Susan, my dear.”

In a few seconds Miss Susan made her appearance, and I had the three before me—A. Clifton, S. Clifton, and M. Clifton.  There was no other girl in the family; and when I described the young lady who had travelled under their name, they could not think of any one in the town—it was a small one—who answered my description, or who had gone on a visit to London.  I had no time to spare, and I hurried back to the station, just catching the train as it left the platform.  At the appointed hour I met Morville at the General Post-office, and threading the long passages of the secretary’s offices, we at length found ourselves anxiously waiting in an ante-room, until we were called into his presence.  Morville had discovered nothing, except that the porters and policemen at Camden-town station had p. 172seen a young lady pass out last night, attended by a swarthy man who looked like a foreigner, and carried a small black portmanteau.

In a few seconds, Miss Susan showed up, and I had all three of them in front of me—A. Clifton, S. Clifton, and M. Clifton. There wasn't another girl in the family, and when I described the young woman who had traveled under their name, they couldn't think of anyone in the town—which was small—who matched my description or who had gone to London for a visit. I didn't have much time, so I rushed back to the station, just making it onto the train as it pulled away from the platform. At the scheduled time, I met Morville at the General Post-office, and navigating through the long halls of the secretary’s offices, we finally found ourselves anxiously waiting in an ante-room until we were called in. Morville hadn't discovered anything new, except that the porters and police officers at Camden-town station had seen a young lady leave last night, accompanied by a dark-skinned man who looked like a foreigner and was carrying a small black suitcase.

I scarcely know how long we waited; it might have been years, for I was conscious of an ever-increasing difficulty in commanding my thoughts, or fixing them upon the subject which had engrossed them all day.  I had not tasted food for twenty-four hours, nor closed my eyes for thirty-six, while, during the whole of the time, my nervous system had been on full strain.

I hardly know how long we waited; it could have been years, because I realized I was finding it harder to control my thoughts or focus on the topic that had consumed me all day. I hadn't eaten anything for twenty-four hours and hadn't slept for thirty-six, while my nervous system had been completely on edge the entire time.

Presently, the summons came, and I was ushered, first, into the inner apartment.  There sat five gentlemen round a table, which was strewed with a number of documents.  There were the Secretary of State, whom we had seen in the morning, our secretary, and Mr. Huntingdon; the fourth was a fine-looking man, whom I afterwards knew to be the Premier; the fifth I recognised as our great chief, the Postmaster-General.  It was an august assemblage to me, and I bowed low; but my head was dizzy, and my throat parched.

Right now, I was called in, and I was led into the inner room first. There were five men seated around a table covered with a bunch of documents. The Secretary of State, who we had seen that morning, our secretary, and Mr. Huntingdon were there; the fourth man was a handsome guy, who I later learned was the Premier; the fifth I recognized as our main boss, the Postmaster-General. It was an impressive group to me, and I bowed deeply, but my head was spinning and my throat was dry.

“Mr. Wilcox,” said our secretary, “you will tell these gentlemen again, the circumstances of the loss you reported to me this morning.”

“Mr. Wilcox,” said our secretary, “please tell these gentlemen again about the circumstances of the loss you reported to me this morning.”

I laid my hand upon the back of a chair to steady myself, and went through the narration for the third time, passing over sundry remarks made by myself to the young lady.  That p. 173done, I added the account of my expedition to Eaton, and the certainty at which I had arrived that my fellow-traveller was not the person she represented herself to be.  After which, I inquired with indescribable anxiety if Mr. Huntingdon’s order were a forgery?

I placed my hand on the back of a chair to steady myself and went through the story for the third time, skipping over various comments I had made to the young lady. That p. 173 done, I added the details of my trip to Eaton and how I was certain that my fellow traveler wasn't who she claimed to be. After that, I asked with overwhelming anxiety if Mr. Huntingdon’s order was a forgery.

“I cannot tell, Mr. Wilcox,” said that gentleman, taking the order into his hands, and regarding it with an air of extreme perplexity.  “I could have sworn it was mine, had it been attached to any other document.  I think Forbes’s handwriting is not so well imitated.  But it is the very ink I use, and mine is a peculiar signature.”

“I can’t say, Mr. Wilcox,” said the gentleman, taking the order into his hands and looking at it with a strong sense of confusion. “I could have sworn it was mine if it had been linked to any other document. I don’t think Forbes’s handwriting is imitated that well. But it’s definitely the same ink I use, and my signature is pretty unique.”

It was a very peculiar and old-fashioned signature, with a flourish underneath it not unlike a whip-handle, with the lash caught round it in the middle; but that did not make it the more difficult to forge, as I humbly suggested.  Mr. Huntingdon wrote his name upon a paper, and two or three of the gentlemen tried to imitate the flourish, but vainly.  They gave it up with a smile upon their grave faces.

It was a very strange and old-fashioned signature, with a flourish underneath it that looked like a whip handle, with the lash wrapped around the middle; but that didn’t make it any harder to fake, as I humbly pointed out. Mr. Huntingdon signed his name on a piece of paper, and two or three of the men tried to copy the flourish, but they couldn’t do it. They eventually gave up with smirks on their serious faces.

“You have been careful not to let a hint of this matter drop from you, Mr. Wilcox?” said the Postmaster-General.

“You’ve been careful not to let anything about this slip, Mr. Wilcox?” said the Postmaster-General.

“Not a syllable, my lord,” I answered.

“Not a word, my lord,” I replied.

“It is imperatively necessary that the secret should be kept.  You would be removed from the temptation of telling it, if you had an p. 174appointment in some office abroad.  The packet-agency at Alexandria is vacant, and I will have you appointed to it at once.”

"It’s absolutely essential that the secret stays hidden. You wouldn’t be tempted to share it if you had a p. 174position in some office overseas. The packet agency in Alexandria is open, and I’ll get you appointed to it right away."

It would be a good advance from my present situation, and would doubtless prove a stepping-stone to other and better appointments; but I had a mother living at Fazeley, bedridden and paralytic, who had no pleasure in existence except having me to dwell under the same roof with her.  My head was growing more and more dizzy, and a strange vagueness was creeping over me.

It would be a nice improvement from where I am now and would definitely be a stepping-stone to other, better jobs. But I had a mother living in Fazeley, bedridden and paralyzed, who had no joy in life except having me living under the same roof as her. My head was getting more and more dizzy, and a strange fog was settling over me.

“Gentlemen,” I muttered, “I have a bedridden mother whom I cannot leave.  I was not to blame, gentlemen.”  I fancied there was a stir and movement at the table, but my eyes were dim, and in another second I had lost consciousness.

“Gentlemen,” I murmured, “I have a mother in bed who I can't leave. It’s not my fault, gentlemen.” I thought I noticed some activity at the table, but my vision was blurred, and in a moment, I passed out.

When I came to myself, in two or three minutes, I found that Mr. Huntingdon was kneeling on the floor beside me, supporting my head, while our secretary held a glass of wine to my lips.  I rallied as quickly as possible, and staggered to my feet; but the two gentlemen placed me in the chair against which I had been leaning, and insisted upon my finishing the wine before I tried to speak.

When I regained my senses, in a couple of minutes, I noticed that Mr. Huntingdon was kneeling on the floor next to me, holding my head, while our secretary offered me a glass of wine. I gathered myself as fast as I could and stumbled to my feet; however, the two gentlemen helped me back into the chair I had been leaning against and insisted that I finish the wine before I attempted to talk.

“I have not tasted food all day,” I said, faintly.

“I haven’t eaten anything all day,” I said, weakly.

“Then, my good fellow, you shall go home immediately,” said the Postmaster-General; p. 175“but be on your guard!  Not a word of this must escape you.  Are you a married man?”

“Then, my good friend, you should head home right away,” said the Postmaster-General; p. 175“but stay alert! Not a single word of this should get out. Are you married?”

“No, my lord,” I answered.

“No, my lord,” I replied.

“So much the better,” he added, smiling.  “You can keep a secret from your mother, I dare say.  We rely upon your honour.”

“So much the better,” he added, smiling. “You can keep a secret from your mom, I bet. We’re counting on your word.”

The secretary then rang a bell, and I was committed to the charge of the messenger who answered it; and in a few minutes I was being conveyed in a cab to my London lodgings.  A week afterwards, Tom Morville was sent out to a post-office in Canada, where he settled down, married, and is still living, perfectly satisfied with his position, as he occasionally informs me by letter.  For myself, I remained as I desired, in my old post as travelling-clerk until the death of my mother, which occurred some ten or twelve months afterwards.  I was then promoted to an appointment as a clerk in charge, upon the first vacancy.

The secretary rang a bell, and I was handed over to the messenger who came to answer it; a few minutes later, I was on my way in a cab to my London apartment. A week later, Tom Morville was sent to a post office in Canada, where he settled down, got married, and is still living happily, as he occasionally tells me in his letters. As for me, I stayed in my previous role as a traveling clerk until my mother passed away about ten or twelve months later. After that, I was promoted to a clerk-in-charge position as soon as there was a vacancy.

The business of the clerks in charge is to take possession of any post-office in the kingdom, upon the death or resignation of the postmaster, or when circumstances of suspicion cause his suspension from office.  My new duties carried me three or four times into Mr. Huntingdon’s district.  Though that gentleman and I never exchanged a word with regard to the mysterious loss in which we had both had an innocent share, he distinguished p. 176me with peculiar favour, and more than once invited me to visit him at his own house.  He lived alone, having but one daughter, who had married, somewhat against his will, one of his clerks: the Mr. Forbes whose handwriting had been so successfully imitated in the official order presented to me by the self-styled Miss Anne Clifton.  (By the way, I may here mention, though it has nothing to do with my story, that my acquaintance with the Cliftons had ripened into an intimacy, which resulted in my engagement and marriage to Mary.)

The clerks in charge are responsible for taking over any post office in the kingdom when the postmaster dies or resigns, or if there's any suspicion that leads to his suspension. My new responsibilities took me to Mr. Huntingdon’s district three or four times. Although Mr. Huntingdon and I never talked about the strange loss we were both innocently involved in, he treated me with special attention and invited me to his home several times. He lived alone, with just one daughter who had married one of his clerks, Mr. Forbes, against his wishes. Mr. Forbes was the one whose handwriting was cleverly copied in the official order that self-styled Miss Anne Clifton gave me. (By the way, I should mention, even though it's not part of my story, that my friendship with the Cliftons developed into a close relationship, which led to my engagement and marriage to Mary.)

It would be beside my purpose to specify the precise number of years which elapsed before I was once again summoned to the secretary’s private apartment, where I found him closeted with Mr. Huntingdon.  Mr. Huntingdon shook hands with unofficial cordiality; and then the secretary proceeded to state the business on hand.

It wouldn't be relevant for me to mention the exact number of years that passed before I was called back to the secretary’s private office, where I found him meeting with Mr. Huntingdon. Mr. Huntingdon greeted me with a friendly handshake, and then the secretary began to explain the matter at hand.

“Mr. Wilcox, you remember our offer to place you in office in Alexandria?” he said.

“Mr. Wilcox, do you remember our offer to have you take a position in Alexandria?” he said.

“Certainly, sir,” I answered.

"Sure, sir," I replied.

“It has been a troublesome office,” he continued, almost pettishly.  “We sent out Mr. Forbes only six months ago, on account of his health, which required a warmer climate, and now his medical man reports that his life is not worth three weeks’ purchase.”

“It’s been a difficult job,” he continued, almost sulkily. “We sent Mr. Forbes away only six months ago because he needed a warmer climate for his health, and now his doctor says his life isn’t worth three weeks’ purchase.”

Upon Mr. Huntingdon’s face there rested p. 177an expression of profound anxiety; and as the secretary paused he addressed himself to me.

Upon Mr. Huntingdon’s face was an expression of deep worry; and as the secretary paused, he spoke to me.

“Mr. Wilcox,” he said, “I have been soliciting, as a personal favour, that you should be sent out to take charge of the packet-agency, in order that my daughter may have some one at hand to befriend her, and manage her business affairs for her.  You are not personally acquainted with her, but I know I can trust her with you.”

“Mr. Wilcox,” he said, “I’ve been asking, as a personal favor, for you to be sent out to manage the packet agency so that my daughter can have someone nearby to support her and handle her business affairs. You don’t know her personally, but I trust that you will take good care of her.”

“You may, Mr. Huntingdon,” I said, warmly.  “I will do anything I can to aid Mrs. Forbes.  When do you wish me to start?”

“You may, Mr. Huntingdon,” I said, warmly. “I will do everything I can to help Mrs. Forbes. When do you want me to start?”

“How soon can you be ready?” was the rejoinder.

“How soon can you be ready?” was the response.

“To-morrow morning.”

"Tomorrow morning."

I was not married then, and I anticipated no delay in setting off.  Nor was there any.  I travelled with the overland mail through France to Marseilles, embarked in a vessel for Alexandria, and in a few days from the time I first heard of my destination set foot in the office there.  All the postal arrangements had fallen into considerable irregularity and confusion; for, as I was informed immediately on my arrival, Mr. Forbes had been in a dying condition for the last week, and of course the absence of a master had borne the usual results.  I took formal possession of the office, and then, conducted by one of the clerks, I p. 178proceeded to the dwelling of the unfortunate postmaster and his no less unfortunate wife.  It would be out of place in this narrative to indulge in any traveller’s tales about the strange place where I was so unexpectedly located.  Suffice it to say, that the darkened sultry room into which I was shown, on inquiring for Mrs. Forbes, was bare of furniture, and destitute of all those little tokens of refinement and taste which make our English parlours so pleasant to the eye.  There was, however, a piano in one of the dark corners of the room, open, and with a sheet of music on it.  While I waited for Mrs. Forbes’s appearance, I strolled idly up to the piano to see what music it might be.  The next moment my eye fell upon an antique red morocco workbox standing on the top of the piano—a workbox evidently, for the lid was not closely shut, and a few threads of silk and cotton were hanging out of it.  In a kind of dream—for it was difficult to believe that the occurrence was a fact—I carried the box to the darkened window, and there, plain in my sight, was the device scratched upon the leather: the revolutionary symbol of a heart with a dagger through it.  I had found the Premier’s despatch-box in the parlour of the packet-agent of Alexandria!

I wasn’t married at the time, and I expected no delays in my departure. There were none. I traveled with the overland mail through France to Marseilles, boarded a ship for Alexandria, and just a few days after I first learned of my destination, I arrived at the office there. All the postal operations had fallen into significant disarray and confusion; as I was told right upon my arrival, Mr. Forbes had been on the brink of death for the last week, and naturally, the absence of a master had led to the usual chaos. I formally took over the office, and then, led by one of the clerks, I went to the home of the unfortunate postmaster and his equally unfortunate wife. It wouldn’t be appropriate in this story to digress into any travel anecdotes about the strange place where I suddenly found myself. It’s enough to say that the dim, humid room I was shown into while asking for Mrs. Forbes was empty of furniture and lacked all those little touches of sophistication and style that make our English living rooms so inviting. There was, however, a piano in one of the dark corners of the room, open with a sheet of music on it. While I waited for Mrs. Forbes to appear, I casually approached the piano to see what music was there. The next moment, I noticed an old red morocco workbox sitting on top of the piano—a workbox, for the lid wasn’t tightly shut, and a few threads of silk and cotton were hanging out. In a sort of daze—since it was hard to believe this was real—I took the box to the dim window, and there, clearly visible to me, was the design scratched into the leather: the revolutionary symbol of a heart pierced by a dagger. I had discovered the Premier’s dispatch box in the living room of the packet agent in Alexandria!

I stood for some minutes with that dream-like feeling upon me, gazing at the box in the p. 179dim obscure light.  It could not be real!  My fancy must be playing a trick upon me!  But the sound of a light step—for, light as it was, I heard it distinctly as it approached the room—broke my trance, and I hastened to replace the box on the piano, and to stoop down as if examining the music before the door opened.  I had not sent in my name to Mrs. Forbes, for I did not suppose that she was acquainted with it, nor could she see me distinctly, as I stood in the gloom.  But I could see her.  She had the slight slender figure, the childlike face, and the fair hair of Miss Anne Clifton.  She came quickly across the room, holding out both her hands in a childish appealing manner.

I stood there for a few minutes, feeling like I was in a dream, staring at the box in the p. 179dim, shadowy light. It couldn't be real! My imagination must be messing with me! But then I heard a light footstep—light as it was, I clearly heard it as it got closer to the room—which brought me back to reality. I quickly put the box back on the piano and crouched down as if I was looking at the music just as the door opened. I hadn’t sent my name in to Mrs. Forbes because I didn't think she knew who I was, and she couldn't see me clearly in the shadows. But I could see her. She had the slender figure, childlike face, and fair hair of Miss Anne Clifton. She crossed the room quickly, holding out both hands in a childlike, pleading way.

“O!” she wailed, in a tone that went straight to my heart, “he is dead!  He has just died!”

“O!” she cried, in a way that pierced my heart, “he's dead! He just died!”

It was no time then to speak about the red morocco workbox.  This little childish creature, who did not look a day older than when I had last seen her in my travelling post-office, was a widow in a strange land, far away from any friend save myself.  I had brought her a letter from her father.  The first duties that devolved upon me were those of her husband’s interment, which had to take place immediately.  Three or four weeks elapsed before I could, with any humanity, enter upon the investigation of her mysterious complicity in the p. 180daring theft practised on the government and the post-office.

It wasn't the right time to talk about the red morocco workbox. This young girl, who looked just as she did the last time I saw her in my traveling post office, was a widow in a foreign land, with no one to rely on but me. I had brought her a letter from her father. My first responsibilities were about burying her husband, which needed to happen right away. It took three or four weeks before I could, with any compassion, start looking into her mysterious involvement in the p. 180daring theft committed against the government and the post office.

I did not see the despatch-box again.  In the midst of her new and vehement grief, Mrs. Forbes had the precaution to remove it before I was ushered again into the room where I had discovered it.  I was at some trouble to hit upon any plan by which to gain a second sight of it; but I was resolved that Mrs. Forbes should not leave Alexandria without giving me a full explanation.  We were waiting for remittances and instructions from England, and in the meantime the violence of her grief abated, and she recovered a good share of her old buoyancy and loveliness, which had so delighted me on my first acquaintance with her.  As her demands upon my sympathy weakened, my curiosity grew stronger, and at last mastered me.  I carried with me a netted purse which required mending, and I asked her to catch up the broken meshes while I waited for it.

I didn't see the dispatch box again. In the middle of her intense grief, Mrs. Forbes took the precaution to remove it before I was brought back into the room where I had found it. I struggled to come up with a plan to get another look at it, but I was determined that Mrs. Forbes wouldn’t leave Alexandria without giving me a full explanation. We were waiting for money and instructions from England, and in the meantime, her grief lessened, and she regained much of her old cheerfulness and beauty that had so fascinated me when we first met. As her need for my sympathy faded, my curiosity grew stronger and eventually took over. I brought a netted purse that needed repair and asked her to fix the broken parts while I waited for it.

“I will tell your maid to bring your workbox,” I said, going to the door and calling the servant.  “Your mistress has a red morocco workbox,” I said to her, as she answered my summons.

“I'll have your maid bring your workbox,” I said, walking to the door and calling for the servant. “Your mistress has a red leather workbox,” I told her as she responded to my call.

“Yes, sir,” she replied.

"Yes, sir," she said.

“Where is it?”

"Where's it?"

“In her bedroom,” she said.

“In her room,” she said.

“Mrs. Forbes wishes it brought here.”  I p. 181turned back into the room.  Mrs. Forbes had gone deadly pale, but her eyes looked sullen, and her teeth were clenched under her lips with an expression of stubbornness.  The maid brought the workbox.  I walked, with it in my hands, up to the sofa where she was seated.

“Mrs. Forbes wants it brought here.” I p. 181turned back into the room. Mrs. Forbes had gone deadly pale, but her eyes looked sullen, and her teeth were clenched under her lips with a look of stubbornness. The maid brought the workbox. I walked, holding it in my hands, up to the sofa where she was sitting.

“You remember this mark?” I asked; “I think neither of us can ever forget it.”

“You remember this mark?” I asked. “I don’t think either of us will ever forget it.”

She did not answer by word, but there was a very intelligent gleam in her blue eyes.

She didn't respond verbally, but there was a sharp glint in her blue eyes.

“Now,” I continued, softly, “I promised your father to befriend you, and I am not a man to forget a promise.  But you must tell me the whole simple truth.”

“Now,” I continued gently, “I promised your dad to befriend you, and I’m not someone who forgets a promise. But you have to tell me the whole truth.”

I was compelled to reason with her, and to urge her for some time.  I confess I went so far as to remind her that there was an English consul at Alexandria, to whom I could resort.  At last she opened her stubborn lips, and the whole story came out, mingled with sobs and showers of tears.

I felt the need to talk to her and push her for a while. I admit I even reminded her that there was an English consul in Alexandria I could go to. Finally, she broke her silence, and the entire story spilled out, mixed with sobs and tears.

She had been in love with Alfred, she said, and they were too poor to marry, and papa would not hear of such a thing.  She was always in want of money, she was kept so short; and they promised to give her such a great sum—a vast sum—five hundred pounds.

She said she had been in love with Alfred, but they didn’t have enough money to get married, and her dad wouldn’t allow it. She was always struggling for cash; they barely gave her enough. They promised to give her a huge amount—a whopping five hundred pounds.

“But who bribed you?” I inquired.

"But who paid you off?" I asked.

A foreign gentleman whom she had met in London, called Monsieur Bonnard.  It was a p. 182French name, but she was not sure that he was a Frenchman.  He talked to her about her father being a surveyor in the post-office, and asked her a great number of questions.  A few weeks after, she met him in their own town by accident, she and Mr. Forbes; and Alfred had a long private talk with him, and they came to her, and told her she could help them very much.  They asked her if she could be brave enough to carry off a little red box out of the travelling post-office, containing nothing but papers.  After a while she consented.  When she had confessed so much under compulsion, Mrs. Forbes seemed to take a pleasure in the narrative, and went on fluently.

A foreign gentleman she had met in London, named Monsieur Bonnard. It was a p. 182French name, but she wasn't sure if he was actually French. He talked to her about her father being a surveyor at the post office and asked her a lot of questions. A few weeks later, she ran into him in their own town by chance, along with Mr. Forbes; Alfred had a long private conversation with him, and they approached her, saying she could really help them. They asked her if she would be brave enough to take a small red box from the traveling post office that contained nothing but papers. After a moment, she agreed. Once she had admitted so much under pressure, Mrs. Forbes seemed to enjoy the story and continued speaking fluently.

“We required papa’s signature to the order, and we did not know how to get it.  Luckily he had a fit of the gout, and was very peevish; and I had to read over a lot of official papers to him, and then he signed them.  One of the papers I read twice, and slipped the order into its place after the second reading.  I thought I should have died with fright; but just then he was in great pain, and glad to get his work over.  I made an excuse that I was going to visit my aunt at Beckby, but instead of going there direct, we contrived to be at the station at Eaton a minute or two before the mail train came up.  I kept outside the station door till we heard the whistle, and just then p. 183the postman came running down the road, and I followed him straight through the booking-office, and asked him to give you the order, which I put into his hand.  He scarcely saw me.  I just caught a glimpse of Monsieur Bonnard’s face through the window of the compartment next the van, when Alfred had gone.  They had promised me that the train should stop at Camden-town, if I could only keep your attention engaged until then.  You know how I succeeded.”

“We needed Dad’s signature on the order, but we didn’t know how to get it. Fortunately, he had a gout attack and was really irritable; so I had to read a bunch of official papers to him, and then he signed them. I read one of the papers twice and slipped the order into its spot after the second reading. I thought I would faint from fear, but he was in so much pain that he just wanted to get his work done. I made up an excuse that I was going to visit my aunt in Beckby, but instead of going straight there, we planned to be at the Eaton station a minute or two before the mail train arrived. I stayed outside the station door until we heard the whistle, and just then the postman came running down the road, so I followed him right through the booking office and asked him to give you the order, which I placed in his hand. He barely noticed me. I only caught a glimpse of Monsieur Bonnard’s face through the window of the compartment next to the van when Alfred had left. They had promised me that the train would stop at Camden Town, as long as I could keep your attention occupied until then. You know how well I managed that.”

“But how did you dispose of the box?” I asked.  “You could not have concealed it about you; that I am sure of.”

“But how did you get rid of the box?” I asked. “You couldn't have hidden it on you; I'm sure of that.”

“Ah!” she said, “nothing was easier.  Monsieur Bonnard had described the van to me, and you remember I put the box down at the end of the counter, close to the corner where I hid myself at every station.  There was a door with a window in it, and I asked if I might have the window open, as the van was too warm for me.  I believe Monsieur Bonnard could have taken it from me by only leaning through his window, but he preferred stepping out, and taking it from my hand, just as the train was leaving Watford—on the far side of the carriages, you understand.  It was the last station, and the train came to a stand at Camden-town.  After all, the box was not out of your sight more than twenty minutes before you missed it.  Monsieur Bonnard and p. 184I hurried out of the station, and Alfred followed us.  The box was forced open—the lock has never been mended, for it was a peculiar one—and Monsieur Bonnard took possession of the papers.  He left the box with me, after putting inside it a roll of notes.  Alfred and I were married next morning, and I went back to my aunt’s; but we did not tell papa of our marriage for three or four months.  That is the story of my red morocco workbox.”

“Ah!” she said, “nothing was easier. Monsieur Bonnard had told me about the van, and you remember I put the box down at the end of the counter, close to the corner where I always hid at each station. There was a door with a window, and I asked if I could have the window open because the van was too warm for me. I think Monsieur Bonnard could have taken it from me just by leaning through his window, but he preferred to step out and take it from my hand, right as the train was leaving Watford—on the far side of the carriages, you know. It was the last stop, and the train came to a halt at Camden Town. After all, the box was out of your sight no more than twenty minutes before you noticed it was gone. Monsieur Bonnard and I hurried out of the station, and Alfred followed us. The box was opened—the lock has never been fixed because it was a unique one—and Monsieur Bonnard claimed the papers. He left the box with me after putting a roll of notes inside it. Alfred and I got married the next morning, and I went back to my aunt’s; but we didn't tell Dad about our marriage for three or four months. That’s the story of my red morocco workbox.”

She smiled with the provoking mirthfulness of a mischievous child.  There was one point still, on which my curiosity was unsatisfied.

She smiled with the playful joy of a mischievous child. There was still one thing that left my curiosity unanswered.

“Did you know what the despatches were about?” I asked.

“Did you know what the messages were about?” I asked.

“O no!” she answered; “I never understood politics in the least.  I knew nothing about them.  Monsieur did not say a word; he did not even look at the papers while we were by.  I would never, never, have taken a registered letter, or anything with money in it, you know.  But all those papers could be written again quite easily.  You must not think me a thief, Mr. Wilcox; there was nothing worth money among the papers.”

“O no!” she replied; “I’ve never really understood politics at all. I didn’t know anything about them. Monsieur didn’t say a word; he didn’t even glance at the papers while we were there. I would never, ever have taken a registered letter, or anything with money in it, you know. But all those papers could be easily rewritten. Please don’t think of me as a thief, Mr. Wilcox; there was nothing valuable among the papers.”

“They were worth five hundred pounds to you,” I said.  “Did you ever see Bonnard again?”

“They were worth five hundred pounds to you,” I said. “Did you ever see Bonnard again?”

“Never again,” she replied.  “He said he p. 185was going to return to his native country.  I don’t think Bonnard was his real name.”

“Never again,” she replied. “He said he p. 185was going to go back to his home country. I don’t think Bonnard was his real name.”

Most likely not, I thought; but I said no more to Mrs. Forbes.  Once again I was involved in a great perplexity about this affair.  It was clearly my duty to report the discovery at head-quarters, but I shrank from doing so.  One of the chief culprits was already gone to another judgment than that of man; several years had obliterated all traces of Monsieur Bonnard; and the only victim of justice would be this poor little dupe of the two greater criminals.  At last I came to the conclusion to send the whole of the particulars to Mr. Huntingdon himself; and I wrote them to him, without remark or comment.

Most likely not, I thought; but I didn’t say anything more to Mrs. Forbes. Again, I found myself deeply confused about this situation. It was clearly my responsibility to report the discovery to headquarters, but I hesitated to do so. One of the main wrongdoers was already facing a judgment greater than that of man; years had erased all evidence of Monsieur Bonnard; and the only person who would face justice would be this poor little pawn of the two larger criminals. Finally, I decided to send all the details directly to Mr. Huntingdon, and I wrote them to him without any remarks or comments.

The answer that came to Mrs. Forbes and me in Alexandria was the announcement of Mr. Huntingdon’s sudden death of some disease of the heart, on the day which I calculated would put him in possession of my communication.  Mrs. Forbes was again overwhelmed with apparently heartrending sorrow and remorse.  The income left to her was something less than one hundred pounds a year.  The secretary of the post-office, who had been a personal friend of the deceased gentleman, was his sole executor; and I received a letter from him, containing one for Mrs. Forbes, which recommended her, in terms not to be misunderstood, to fix upon p. 186some residence abroad, and not to return to England.  She fancied she would like the seclusion and quiet of a convent; and I made arrangements for her to enter one in Malta, where she would still be under British protection.  I left Alexandria myself on the arrival of another packet-agent; and on my return to London I had a private interview with the secretary.  I found that there was no need to inform him of the circumstances I have related to you, as he had taken possession of all Mr. Huntingdon’s papers.  In consideration of his ancient friendship, and of the escape of those who most merited punishment, he had come to the conclusion that it was quite as well to let bygones be bygones.

The news that Mrs. Forbes and I received in Alexandria was that Mr. Huntingdon had suddenly died from a heart disease, on the very day I believed he would have gotten my message. Mrs. Forbes was once again overwhelmed with what seemed like genuine sorrow and guilt. The income she was left with was just under one hundred pounds a year. The post office secretary, who was a personal friend of the deceased, was the only executor of his estate. I got a letter from him that included one for Mrs. Forbes, advising her, in no uncertain terms, to choose a home abroad and not come back to England. She thought she would appreciate the solitude and peace of a convent, so I arranged for her to enter one in Malta, where she would still be under British protection. I left Alexandria when another mail agent arrived, and when I returned to London, I had a private meeting with the secretary. I realized there was no need to fill him in on the details I just shared with you, as he had already taken control of all Mr. Huntingdon’s documents. Out of respect for their long friendship and acknowledging that those who deserved punishment had escaped, he decided it was best to let the past remain in the past.

At the conclusion of the interview I delivered a message which Mrs. Forbes had emphatically entrusted to me.

At the end of the interview, I passed on a message that Mrs. Forbes had made sure to share with me.

“Mrs. Forbes wished me to impress upon your mind,” I said, “that neither she nor Mr. Forbes would have been guilty of this misdemeanour if they had not been very much in love with one another, and very much in want of money.”

“Mrs. Forbes wanted me to make sure you understand,” I said, “that neither she nor Mr. Forbes would have committed this mistake if they hadn’t been deeply in love with each other and desperately in need of money.”

“Ah!” replied the secretary, with a smile, “if Cleopatra’s nose had been shorter, the fate of the world would have been different!”

“Ah!” replied the secretary with a smile, “if Cleopatra’s nose had been shorter, the fate of the world would have changed!”

p. 187No. 5 BRANCH LINE
THE ENGINEER

His name, sir, was Matthew Price; mine is Benjamin Hardy.  We were born within a few days of each other; bred up in the same village; taught at the same school.  I cannot remember the time when we were not close friends.  Even as boys, we never knew what it was to quarrel.  We had not a thought, we had not a possession, that was not in common.  We would have stood by each other, fearlessly, to the death.  It was such a friendship as one reads about sometimes in books: fast and firm as the great Tors upon our native moorlands, true as the sun in the heavens.

His name, sir, was Matthew Price; mine is Benjamin Hardy. We were born just a few days apart, grew up in the same village, and went to the same school. I can't remember a time when we weren't close friends. Even as kids, we never fought. We didn’t have a thought or a possession that wasn’t shared. We would have stood by each other, without fear, until the end. It was the kind of friendship you sometimes read about in books: strong and steadfast like the great Tors on our native moors, true as the sun in the sky.

The name of our village was Chadleigh.  Lifted high above the pasture flats which stretched away at our feet like a measureless green lake and melted into mist on the furthest horizon, it nestled, a tiny stone-built hamlet, in a sheltered hollow about midway between the plain and the plateau.  Above us, rising ridge beyond ridge, slope beyond slope, p. 188spread the mountainous moor-country, bare and bleak for the most part, with here and there a patch of cultivated field or hardy plantation, and crowned highest of all with masses of huge grey crag, abrupt, isolated, hoary, and older than the deluge.  These were the Tors—Druids’ Tor, King’s Tor, Castle Tor, and the like; sacred places, as I have heard, in the ancient time, where crownings, burnings, human sacrifices, and all kinds of bloody heathen rites were performed.  Bones, too, had been found there, and arrow-heads, and ornaments of gold and glass.  I had a vague awe of the Tors in those boyish days, and would not have gone near them after dark for the heaviest bribe.

The name of our village was Chadleigh. Perched high above the pasture flats that stretched out below us like an endless green lake, which faded into mist on the distant horizon, it sat, a small stone-built village, in a protected hollow about halfway between the plain and the plateau. Above us, rising ridge after ridge, slope after slope, p. 188spread the rugged moorland, mostly bare and desolate, with a few patches of cultivated fields or tough plantations, and topped off with massive grey cliffs, steep, isolated, ancient, and older than the flood. These were the Tors—Druids’ Tor, King’s Tor, Castle Tor, and others; sacred sites, as I’ve heard, in ancient times, where crowning ceremonies, burnings, human sacrifices, and all sorts of bloody pagan rituals took place. Bones had also been found there, along with arrowheads and ornaments made of gold and glass. I had a vague sense of fear about the Tors during those boyhood days and wouldn’t have gone near them after dark even for the biggest reward.

I have said that we were born in the same village.  He was the son of a small farmer, named William Price, and the eldest of a family of seven; I was the only child of Ephraim Hardy, the Chadleigh blacksmith—a well-known man in those parts, whose memory is not forgotten to this day.  Just so far as a farmer is supposed to be a bigger man than a blacksmith, Mat’s father might be said to have a better standing than mine; but William Price, with his small holding and his seven boys, was, in fact, as poor as many a day-labourer; whilst the blacksmith, well-to-do, bustling, popular, and open-handed, was a person of some importance in the place.  All p. 189this, however, had nothing to do with Mat and myself.  It never occurred to either of us that his jacket was out at elbows, or that our mutual funds came altogether from my pocket.  It was enough for us that we sat on the same school-bench, conned our tasks from the same primer, fought each other’s battles, screened each other’s faults, fished, nutted, played truant, robbed orchards and birds’ nests together, and spent every half-hour, authorised or stolen, in each other’s society.  It was a happy time; but it could not go on for ever.  My father, being prosperous, resolved to put me forward in the world.  I must know more, and do better, than himself.  The forge was not good enough, the little world of Chadleigh not wide enough, for me.  Thus it happened that I was still swinging the satchel when Mat was whistling at the plough, and that at last, when my future course was shaped out, we were separated, as it then seemed to us, for life.  For, blacksmith’s son as I was, furnace and forge, in some form or other, pleased me best, and I chose to be a working engineer.  So my father by-and-by apprenticed me to a Birmingham iron-master; and, having bidden farewell to Mat, and Chadleigh, and the grey old Tors in the shadow of which I had spent all the days of my life, I turned my face northward, and went over into “the Black Country.”

I mentioned that we were born in the same village. He was the son of a small farmer named William Price and the oldest of seven siblings; I was the only child of Ephraim Hardy, the blacksmith from Chadleigh—a well-known figure in the area, whose memory is still alive today. As far as social standing goes, a farmer is often viewed as more important than a blacksmith, so Mat’s father might have seemed to have a better reputation than mine; however, with his small farm and seven boys, William Price was just as poor as many laborers, while the blacksmith was well-off, active, popular, and generous, making him a person of some significance in the community. All this, though, didn’t affect Mat and me. We never thought about his worn-out jacket or that all our shared expenses came from my pocket. It was enough for us to sit on the same school bench, learn from the same textbook, fight each other’s battles, cover for each other’s mistakes, fish, gather nuts, skip school, steal from orchards, and raid bird nests together, spending every half-hour, whether officially allowed or not, in each other’s company. It was a happy time; but it couldn’t last forever. My father, being successful, decided he wanted me to get ahead in life. I needed to know more and achieve better things than he did. The forge wasn’t enough, and the little world of Chadleigh wasn’t broad enough for me. So, I found myself still carrying my school bag while Mat was whistling at the plow, and eventually, when my path was laid out, we were separated, as it seemed to us, for life. Even though I was a blacksmith’s son, I found that the furnace and forge in some form appealed to me the most, and I chose to become a working engineer. Eventually, my father apprenticed me to an iron master in Birmingham; so after saying goodbye to Mat, Chadleigh, and the gray old hills under which I had spent all my days, I turned my face north and headed into “the Black Country.”

p. 190I am not going to dwell on this part of my story.  How I worked out the term of my apprenticeship; how, when I had served my full time and become a skilled workman, I took Mat from the plough and brought him over to the Black Country, sharing with him lodging, wages, experience—all, in short, that I had to give; how he, naturally quick to learn and brimful of quiet energy, worked his way up a step at a time, and came by-and-by to be a “first hand” in his own department; how, during all these years of change, and trial, and effort, the old boyish affection never wavered or weakened, but went on, growing with our growth and strengthening with our strength—are facts which I need do no more than outline in this place.

p. 190I’m not going to spend much time on this part of my story. How I completed my apprenticeship; how, after serving my full term and becoming a skilled worker, I brought Mat from the farm to the Black Country, sharing with him my lodging, wages, and experience—everything I had to offer; how he, naturally quick to learn and full of quiet energy, progressed step by step and eventually became a “first hand” in his own department; how, throughout all these years of change, trials, and hard work, our old boyish bond never faded or weakened, but continued to grow stronger along with us—these are things I only need to briefly summarize here.

About this time—it will be remembered that I speak of the days when Mat and I were on the bright side of thirty—it happened that our firm contracted to supply six first-class locomotives to run on the new line, then in process of construction, between Turin and Genoa.  It was the first Italian order we had taken.  We had had dealings with France, Holland, Belgium, Germany; but never with Italy.  The connexion, therefore, was new and valuable—all the more valuable because our Transalpine neighbours had but lately begun to lay down the iron roads, and would be safe to need more of our good English p. 191work as they went on.  So the Birmingham firm set themselves to the contract with a will, lengthened our working hours, increased our wages, took on fresh hands, and determined, if energy and promptitude could do it, to place themselves at the head of the Italian labour-market, and stay there.  They deserved and achieved success.  The six locomotives were not only turned out to time, but were shipped, despatched, and delivered with a promptitude that fairly amazed our Piedmontese consignee.  I was not a little proud, you may be sure, when I found myself appointed to superintend the transport of the engines.  Being allowed a couple of assistants, I contrived that Mat should be one of them; and thus we enjoyed together the first great holiday of our lives.

Around this time—it’s worth noting that I’m talking about the days when Mat and I were just over thirty—we landed a contract to supply six top-of-the-line locomotives for a new railway being built between Turin and Genoa. This was the first Italian order we had secured. We had previously worked with France, Holland, Belgium, and Germany, but never with Italy. This new connection was significant and valuable, especially since our neighbors across the Alps had only recently started laying down railway tracks and would surely need more of our quality English work as they expanded. So, the Birmingham company threw itself into the contract enthusiastically, extended our working hours, raised our wages, brought in new workers, and aimed to lead the Italian labor market. They rightfully earned and achieved success. The six locomotives were completed on schedule and were shipped, dispatched, and delivered so quickly that it genuinely surprised our Piedmontese consignee. I felt quite proud, you can be sure, when I was appointed to oversee the transport of the engines. With permission to bring along a couple of assistants, I made sure Mat was one of them; together we celebrated the first big holiday of our lives.

It was a wonderful change for two Birmingham operatives fresh from the Black Country.  The fairy city, with its crescent background of Alps; the port crowded with strange shipping; the marvellous blue sky and bluer sea; the painted houses on the quays; the quaint cathedral, faced with black and white marble; the street of jewellers, like an Arabian Nights’ bazaar; the street of palaces, with its Moorish court-yards, its fountains and orange-trees; the women veiled like brides; the galley-slaves chained two and two; the processions of priests and friars; the everlasting clangour of bells; the babble of a strange tongue; the p. 192singular lightness and brightness of the climate—made, altogether, such a combination of wonders that we wandered about, the first day, in a kind of bewildered dream, like children at a fair.  Before that week was ended, being tempted by the beauty of the place and the liberality of the pay, we had agreed to take service with the Turin and Genoa Railway Company, and to turn our backs upon Birmingham for ever.

It was an amazing change for two Birmingham workers fresh out of the Black Country. The enchanting city, with its curved backdrop of the Alps; the port filled with unfamiliar ships; the stunning blue sky and even bluer sea; the colorful houses along the docks; the unique cathedral, made of black and white marble; the street of jewelers, resembling an Arabian Nights' market; the street of palaces, featuring its Moorish courtyards, fountains, and orange trees; the women veiled like brides; the galley slaves chained in pairs; the processions of priests and friars; the constant ringing of bells; the chatter of a foreign language; the remarkable lightness and brightness of the climate—altogether created such a mix of wonders that we wandered around on the first day in a kind of dazed dream, like kids at a fair. Before the week was over, charmed by the beauty of the place and the generous pay, we had decided to work for the Turin and Genoa Railway Company and to leave Birmingham behind for good.

Then began a new life—a life so active and healthy, so steeped in fresh air and sunshine, that we sometimes marvelled how we could have endured the gloom of the Black Country.  We were constantly up and down the line: now at Genoa, now at Turin, taking trial trips with the locomotives, and placing our old experiences at the service of our new employers.

Then began a new life—a life so active and healthy, so filled with fresh air and sunshine, that we sometimes wondered how we could have tolerated the dreariness of the Black Country. We were constantly moving up and down the line: now in Genoa, now in Turin, taking trial runs with the locomotives, and putting our past experiences to work for our new employers.

In the meanwhile we made Genoa our headquarters, and hired a couple of rooms over a small shop in a by-street sloping down to the quays.  Such a busy little street—so steep and winding that no vehicles could pass through it, and so narrow that the sky looked like a mere strip of deep-blue ribbon overhead!  Every house in it, however, was a shop, where the goods encroached on the footway, or were piled about the door, or hung like tapestry from the balconies; and all day long, from dawn to dusk, an incessant stream of passers-by p. 193poured up and down between the port and the upper quarter of the city.

In the meantime, we set up our base in Genoa and rented a couple of rooms above a small shop on a steep street that led down to the docks. It was such a lively little street—so steep and winding that no vehicles could fit, and so narrow that the sky looked like just a narrow strip of deep-blue ribbon above! Every building on the street was a shop, with goods spilling onto the sidewalk, piled around the entrance, or hanging like decorations from the balconies. All day long, from dawn until dusk, a nonstop stream of people flowed up and down between the port and the upper part of the city. p. 193

Our landlady was the widow of a silver-worker, and lived by the sale of filigree ornaments, cheap jewellery, combs, fans, and toys in ivory and jet.  She had an only daughter named Gianetta, who served in the shop, and was simply the most beautiful woman I ever beheld.  Looking back across this weary chasm of years, and bringing her image before me (as I can and do) with all the vividness of life, I am unable, even now, to detect a flaw in her beauty.  I do not attempt to describe her.  I do not believe there is a poet living who could find the words to do it; but I once saw a picture that was somewhat like her (not half so lovely, but still like her), and, for aught I know, that picture is still hanging where I last looked at it—upon the walls of the Louvre.  It represented a woman with brown eyes and golden hair, looking over her shoulder into a circular mirror held by a bearded man in the background.  In this man, as I then understood, the artist had painted his own portrait; in her, the portrait of the woman he loved.  No picture that I ever saw was half so beautiful, and yet it was not worthy to be named in the same breath with Gianetta Coneglia.

Our landlady was the widow of a silversmith and made her living selling filigree ornaments, inexpensive jewelry, combs, fans, and toys made of ivory and jet. She had an only daughter named Gianetta, who worked in the shop and was simply the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Looking back over these long years and bringing her image to mind (as I can and do) with all the vibrancy of life, I still can’t find a single flaw in her beauty. I won’t even try to describe her. I don’t think there’s a poet alive who could find the words for it; but I once saw a painting that was somewhat like her (not nearly as lovely, but still a bit like her), and, for all I know, that painting is still hanging where I last saw it—on the walls of the Louvre. It showed a woman with brown eyes and golden hair looking over her shoulder into a round mirror held by a bearded man in the background. In him, as I understood it then, the artist had painted his own likeness; in her, the likeness of the woman he loved. No painting I’ve ever seen was half so beautiful, yet it doesn’t even deserve to be mentioned in the same breath as Gianetta Coneglia.

You may be certain the widow’s shop did not want for customers.  All Genoa knew how fair a face was to be seen behind that dingy little p. 194counter; and Gianetta, flirt as she was, had more lovers than she cared to remember, even by name.  Gentle and simple, rich and poor, from the red-capped sailor buying his earrings or his amulet, to the nobleman carelessly purchasing half the filigrees in the window, she treated them all alike—encouraged them, laughed at them, led them on and turned them off at her pleasure.  She had no more heart than a marble statue; as Mat and I discovered by-and-by, to our bitter cost.

You can be sure the widow’s shop was never short on customers. Everyone in Genoa knew how pretty the face was behind that dingy little p. 194counter; and Gianetta, flirty as she was, had more lovers than she could remember, even by name. Gentle and simple, rich and poor, from the red-capped sailor buying his earrings or his amulet to the nobleman casually purchasing half the filigrees in the window, she treated them all the same—encouraged them, laughed at them, led them on, and pushed them away at her whim. She had no more heart than a marble statue; as Mat and I found out in the end, to our great disappointment.

I cannot tell to this day how it came about, or what first led me to suspect how things were going with us both; but long before the waning of that autumn a coldness had sprung up between my friend and myself.  It was nothing that could have been put into words.  It was nothing that either of us could have explained or justified, to save his life.  We lodged together, ate together, worked together, exactly as before; we even took our long evening’s walk together, when the day’s labour was ended; and except, perhaps, that we were more silent than of old, no mere looker-on could have detected a shadow of change.  Yet there it was, silent and subtle, widening the gulf between us every day.

I still can't figure out how it happened or what made me start to realize what was going on between us. But well before the autumn ended, a chill had settled in between my friend and me. It wasn't anything that could be put into words. It wasn't something either of us could explain or justify, even under pressure. We lived together, ate together, and worked together just like before; we even took our long evening walks together after the day’s work was done. And aside from maybe being a bit quieter than we used to be, an outside observer wouldn’t have noticed any change. Yet it was there, quiet and subtle, deepening the divide between us every day.

It was not his fault.  He was too true and gentle-hearted to have willingly brought about such a state of things between us.  Neither do I believe—fiery as my nature is—that it was p. 195mine.  It was all hers—hers from first to last—the sin, and the shame, and the sorrow.

It wasn't his fault. He was too genuine and kind-hearted to have intentionally caused such a situation between us. I also don't believe—passionate as I am—that it was p. 195my fault. It was entirely hers—hers from beginning to end—the wrongdoing, the embarrassment, and the pain.

If she had shown a fair and open preference for either of us, no real harm could have come of it.  I would have put any constraint upon myself, and, Heaven knows! have borne any suffering, to see Mat really happy.  I know that he would have done the same, and more if he could, for me.  But Gianetta cared not one sou for either.  She never meant to choose between us.  It gratified her vanity to divide us; it amused her to play with us.  It would pass my power to tell how, by a thousand imperceptible shades of coquetry—by the lingering of a glance, the substitution of a word, the flitting of a smile—she contrived to turn our heads, and torture our hearts, and lead us on to love her.  She deceived us both.  She buoyed us both up with hope; she maddened us with jealousy; she crushed us with despair.  For my part, when I seemed to wake to a sudden sense of the ruin that was about our path and I saw how the truest friendship that ever bound two lives together was drifting on to wreck and ruin, I asked myself whether any woman in the world was worth what Mat had been to me and I to him.  But this was not often.  I was readier to shut my eyes upon the truth than to face it; and so lived on, wilfully, in a dream.

If she had shown a fair and open preference for either of us, no real harm could have come from it. I would have held back any restraint, and, God knows! I would have endured any suffering to see Mat truly happy. I know he would have done the same, and more if he could, for me. But Gianetta didn’t care at all for either of us. She never intended to choose between us. It fed her vanity to keep us apart; it amused her to play with us. It would be beyond my ability to explain how, through a thousand subtle flirtations—by holding a gaze a bit longer, using just the right words, flashing a smile—she managed to turn our heads, torment our hearts, and lead us to love her. She deceived us both. She lifted our hopes; she drove us mad with jealousy; she crushed us with despair. For my part, when I seemed to suddenly realize the destruction ahead of us and saw how the truest friendship that ever connected two lives was headed for disaster, I asked myself whether any woman in the world was worth what Mat had been to me and I to him. But that didn’t happen often. I was quicker to close my eyes to the truth than to confront it; and so I continued to live, willfully, in a dream.

Thus the autumn passed away, and winter p. 196came—the strange, treacherous, Genoese winter, green with olive and ilex, brilliant with sunshine, and bitter with storm.  Still, rivals at heart and friends on the surface, Mat and I lingered on in our lodging in the Vicolo Balba.  Still Gianetta held us with her fatal wiles and her still more fatal beauty.  At length there came a day when I felt I could bear the horrible misery and suspense of it no longer.  The sun, I vowed, should not go down before I knew my sentence.  She must choose between us.  She must either take me or let me go.  I was reckless.  I was desperate.  I was determined to know the worst, or the best.  If the worst, I would at once turn my back upon Genoa, upon her, upon all the pursuits and purposes of my past life, and begin the world anew.  This I told her, passionately and sternly, standing before her in the little parlour at the back of the shop, one bleak December morning.

Thus autumn passed, and winter p. 196 arrived—the strange, deceptive Genoese winter, lush with olives and holm oaks, bright with sunshine, and fierce with storms. Still, despite being rivals at heart and friends on the surface, Mat and I lingered in our place on Vicolo Balba. Gianetta continued to captivate us with her deadly allure and even more dangerous beauty. Finally, a day came when I felt I couldn’t endure the dreadful misery and uncertainty any longer. I vowed that the sun would not set before I knew my fate. She had to choose between us; she must either pick me or let me go. I was reckless, desperate, and determined to learn the truth, whether it was bad or good. If it was bad, I would immediately turn my back on Genoa, on her, and on all the ambitions of my past life, and start fresh. I told her this passionately and firmly, standing in front of her in the small parlor at the back of the shop on a bleak December morning.

“If it’s Mat whom you care for most,” I said, “tell me so in one word, and I will never trouble you again.  He is better worth your love.  I am jealous and exacting; he is as trusting and unselfish as a woman.  Speak, Gianetta; am I to bid you good-bye for ever and ever, or am I to write home to my mother in England, bidding her pray to God to bless the woman who has promised to be my wife?”

“If it’s Mat you care about the most,” I said, “just tell me in one word, and I won’t bother you again. He deserves your love more. I’m jealous and demanding; he’s as trusting and selfless as a woman. Speak, Gianetta; should I say goodbye to you forever, or should I write home to my mom in England, asking her to pray to God to bless the woman who has promised to be my wife?”

“You plead your friend’s cause well,” she p. 197replied, haughtily.  “Matteo ought to be grateful.  This is more than he ever did for you.”

“You make a strong case for your friend,” she p. 197replied, arrogantly. “Matteo should be thankful. This is more than he ever did for you.”

“Give me my answer, for pity’s sake,” I exclaimed, “and let me go!”

“Just give me my answer, for goodness' sake,” I shouted, “and let me leave!”

“You are free to go or stay, Signor Inglese,” she replied.  “I am not your jailor.”

“You can leave or stay, Signor Inglese,” she said. “I’m not your jailer.”

“Do you bid me leave you?”

“Are you asking me to leave you?”

“Beata Madre! not I.”

"Beata Madre! Not me."

“Will you marry me, if I stay?”

“Will you marry me if I stick around?”

She laughed aloud—such a merry, mocking, musical laugh, like a chime of silver bells!

She laughed out loud—such a joyful, teasing, melodic laugh, like a ringing of silver bells!

“You ask too much,” she said.

“You're asking for too much,” she said.

“Only what you have led me to hope these five or six months past!”

“Only what you’ve led me to hope for these past five or six months!”

“That is just what Matteo says.  How tiresome you both are!”

"That's exactly what Matteo says. You two are so annoying!"

“O, Gianetta,” I said, passionately, “be serious for one moment!  I am a rough fellow, it is true—not half good enough or clever enough for you; but I love you with my whole heart, and an Emperor could do no more.”

“O, Gianetta,” I said, passionately, “be serious for a moment! I’m not exactly smooth or sophisticated, it’s true—not even close to being good enough or smart enough for you; but I love you with all my heart, and an Emperor couldn’t do more.”

“I am glad of it,” she replied; “I do not want you to love me less.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” she replied; “I don’t want you to love me any less.”

“Then you cannot wish to make me wretched!  Will you promise me?”

“Then you can’t want to make me miserable! Will you promise me?”

“I promise nothing,” said she, with another burst of laughter; “except that I will not marry Matteo!”

“I promise nothing,” she said with another laugh, “except that I will not marry Matteo!”

Except that she would not marry Matteo!  p. 198Only that.  Not a word of hope for myself.  Nothing but my friend’s condemnation.  I might get comfort, and selfish triumph, and some sort of base assurance out of that, if I could.  And so, to my shame, I did.  I grasped at the vain encouragement, and, fool that I was! let her put me off again unanswered.  From that day, I gave up all effort at self-control, and let myself drift blindly on—to destruction.

Except that she wouldn’t marry Matteo!  p. 198Just that.  Not a word of hope for myself.  Nothing but my friend's judgment.  I might gain some comfort, selfish satisfaction, and a misguided sense of certainty from that, if I could.  And so, to my shame, I did.  I clung to that empty encouragement, and, foolish as I was! let her dismiss me once more without an answer.  From that day on, I gave up all attempts at self-control and let myself drift blindly toward destruction.

At length things became so bad between Mat and myself that it seemed as if an open rupture must be at hand.  We avoided each other, scarcely exchanged a dozen sentences in a day, and fell away from all our old familiar habits.  At this time—I shudder to remember it!—there were moments when I felt that I hated him.

At last, things got so bad between Mat and me that it felt like a complete break was inevitable. We started avoiding each other, barely exchanged a dozen words a day, and drifted away from all our old routines. At that time—I cringe to think about it!—there were moments when I felt like I hated him.

Thus, with the trouble deepening and widening between us day by day, another month or five weeks went by; and February came; and, with February, the Carnival.  They said in Genoa that it was a particularly dull carnival; and so it must have been; for, save a flag or two hung out in some of the principal streets, and a sort of festa look about the women, there were no special indications of the season.  It was, I think, the second day when, having been on the line all the morning, I returned to Genoa at dusk, and, to my surprise, found Mat Price on the platform.  p. 199He came up to me, and laid his hand on my arm.

So, with the issues between us getting deeper day by day, another month or about five weeks passed; February arrived, bringing the Carnival. People in Genoa said it was a particularly dull carnival, and it must have been true; aside from a flag or two hanging out in some of the main streets and a festive vibe among the women, there were no obvious signs of the season. I think it was the second day when, after being on the line all morning, I returned to Genoa at dusk and, to my surprise, saw Mat Price on the platform. p. 199He came up to me and put his hand on my arm.

“You are in late,” he said.  “I have been waiting for you three-quarters of an hour.  Shall we dine together to-day?”

“You're late,” he said. “I’ve been waiting for you for about forty-five minutes. Should we have dinner together today?”

Impulsive as I am, this evidence of returning good will at once called up my better feelings.

Impulsive as I am, this sign of returning goodwill immediately brought out my better feelings.

“With all my heart, Mat,” I replied; “shall we go to Gozzoli’s?”

“Absolutely, Mat,” I replied. “Shall we head to Gozzoli’s?”

“No, no,” he said, hurriedly.  “Some quieter place—some place where we can talk.  I have something to say to you.”

“No, no,” he said quickly. “Somewhere quieter—somewhere we can talk. I need to tell you something.”

I noticed now that he looked pale and agitated, and an uneasy sense of apprehension stole upon me.  We decided on the “Pescatore,” a little out-of-the-way trattoria, down near the Molo Vecchio.  There, in a dingy salon, frequented chiefly by seamen, and redolent of tobacco, we ordered our simple dinner.  Mat scarcely swallowed a morsel; but, calling presently for a bottle of Sicilian wine, drank eagerly.

I noticed that he looked pale and nervous, and a feeling of unease washed over me. We chose the “Pescatore,” a little off-the-beaten-path trattoria near the Molo Vecchio. There, in a rundown dining room mostly visited by sailors and smelling strongly of tobacco, we ordered our simple dinner. Mat barely ate anything; however, he soon asked for a bottle of Sicilian wine and drank it eagerly.

“Well, Mat,” I said, as the last dish was placed on the table, “what news have you?”

“Well, Mat,” I said, as the last dish was set on the table, “what's the news?”

“Bad.”

“Not good.”

“I guessed that from your face.”

“I could tell that from your expression.”

“Bad for you—bad for me.  Gianetta.”

“Bad for you—bad for me. Gianetta.”

“What of Gianetta?”

“What about Gianetta?”

He passed his hand nervously across his lips.

He ran his hand nervously over his lips.

“Gianetta is false—worse than false,” he said, in a hoarse voice.  “She values an honest p. 200man’s heart just as she values a flower for her hair—wears it for a day, then throws it aside for ever.  She has cruelly wronged us both.”

“Gianetta is fake—worse than fake,” he said in a raspy voice. “She appreciates an honest man’s heart just like she appreciates a flower for her hair—she wears it for a day, then discards it forever. She has hurt us both deeply.”

“In what way?  Good Heavens, speak out!”

“In what way? Oh my goodness, just say it!”

“In the worst way that a woman can wrong those who love her.  She has sold herself to the Marchese Loredano.”

“In the worst way a woman can betray those who love her. She has sold herself to Marchese Loredano.”

The blood rushed to my head and face in a burning torrent.  I could scarcely see, and dared not trust myself to speak.

The blood surged to my head and face in a searing wave. I could barely see, and I didn't dare to speak.

“I saw her going towards the cathedral,” he went on, hurriedly.  “It was about three hours ago.  I thought she might be going to confession, so I hung back and followed her at a distance.  When she got inside, however, she went straight to the back of the pulpit, where this man was waiting for her.  You remember him—an old man who used to haunt the shop a month or two back.  Well, seeing how deep in conversation they were, and how they stood close under the pulpit with their backs towards the church, I fell into a passion of anger and went straight up the aisle, intending to say or do something: I scarcely knew what; but, at all events, to draw her arm through mine, and take her home.  When I came within a few feet, however, and found only a big pillar between myself and them, I paused.  They could not see me, nor I them; p. 201but I could hear their voices distinctly, and—and I listened.”

“I saw her walking toward the cathedral,” he continued hurriedly. “It was about three hours ago. I thought she might be going to confession, so I hung back and followed her at a distance. When she got inside, though, she went straight to the back of the pulpit, where this man was waiting for her. You remember him—an old man who used to frequent the shop a month or two ago. Well, seeing how deeply they were engaged in conversation, and how they stood close under the pulpit with their backs to the church, I got really angry and marched up the aisle, planning to say or do something; I wasn’t even sure what, but at least to take her arm and lead her home. When I got within a few feet, though, and saw only a big pillar between us, I stopped. They couldn’t see me, nor I them; p. 201but I could hear their voices clearly, and—and I listened.”

“Well, and you heard—”

“Well, you heard—”

“The terms of a shameful bargain—beauty on the one side, gold on the other; so many thousand francs a year; a villa near Naples—Pah! it makes me sick to repeat it.”

“The terms of a disgraceful deal—beauty on one side, money on the other; so many thousand euros a year; a villa near Naples—Ugh! It makes me nauseous to say it.”

And, with a shudder, he poured out another glass of wine and drank it at a draught.

And, with a shiver, he poured another glass of wine and gulped it down in one go.

“After that,” he said, presently, “I made no effort to bring her away.  The whole thing was so cold-blooded, so deliberate, so shameful, that I felt I had only to wipe her out of my memory, and leave her to her fate.  I stole out of the cathedral, and walked about here by the sea for ever so long, trying to get my thoughts straight.  Then I remembered you, Ben; and the recollection of how this wanton had come between us and broken up our lives drove me wild.  So I went up to the station and waited for you.  I felt you ought to know it all; and—and I thought, perhaps, that we might go back to England together.”

“After that,” he said, after a moment, “I didn’t try to take her away. The whole situation was so cold-hearted, so calculated, so shameful, that I felt I had to erase her from my memory and leave her to deal with it. I slipped out of the cathedral and wandered around by the sea for a long time, trying to sort out my thoughts. Then I remembered you, Ben; and the memory of how this reckless person came between us and ruined our lives drove me crazy. So I went up to the station and waited for you. I thought you should know everything; and—and I hoped that maybe we could go back to England together.”

“The Marchese Loredano!”

“The Marchese Loredano!”

It was all that I could say; all that I could think.  As Mat had just said of himself, I felt “like one stunned.”

It was everything I could say; everything I could think. As Mat had just said about himself, I felt “like one stunned.”

“There is one other thing I may as well tell you,” he added, reluctantly, “if only to show you how false a woman can be.  We—we were to have been married next month.”

“There’s one more thing I might as well tell you,” he added, hesitantly, “just to show you how deceitful a woman can be. We— we were supposed to get married next month.”

p. 202We?  Who?  What do you mean?”

p. 202We? Who? What are you talking about?”

“I mean that we were to have been married—Gianetta and I.”

“I mean that Gianetta and I were supposed to get married.”

A sudden storm of rage, of scorn, of incredulity, swept over me at this, and seemed to carry my senses away.

A sudden storm of anger, contempt, and disbelief engulfed me at this, making me feel like I was losing my grip on reality.

You!” I cried.  “Gianetta marry you!  I don’t believe it.”

You!” I shouted. “Gianetta marry you! I can’t believe it.”

“I wish I had not believed it,” he replied, looking up as if puzzled by my vehemence.  “But she promised me; and I thought, when she promised it, she meant it.”

“I wish I hadn’t believed it,” he replied, looking up as if confused by my intensity. “But she promised me; and I thought, when she made that promise, she meant it.”

“She told me, weeks ago, that she would never be your wife!”

“She told me, weeks ago, that she would never marry you!”

His colour rose, his brow darkened; when his answer came, it was as calm as the last.

His face flushed, his expression soured; when he finally responded, it was just as composed as before.

“Indeed!” he said.  “Then it is only one baseness more.  She told me that she had refused you; and that was why we kept our engagement secret.”

“Definitely!” he said. “So it’s just one more act of dishonor. She told me she had turned you down; that’s why we kept our engagement under wraps.”

“Tell the truth, Mat Price,” I said, well-nigh beside myself with suspicion.  “Confess that every word of this is false!  Confess that Gianetta will not listen to you, and that you are afraid I may succeed where you have failed.  As perhaps I shall—as perhaps I shall, after all!”

“Tell the truth, Mat Price,” I said, almost beside myself with suspicion. “Admit that every word of this is a lie! Admit that Gianetta won’t listen to you, and that you’re afraid I might succeed where you’ve failed. As maybe I will—maybe I will, after all!”

“Are you mad?” he exclaimed.  “What do you mean?”

“Are you crazy?” he exclaimed. “What do you mean?”

“That I believe it’s just a trick to get me p. 203away to England—that I don’t credit a syllable of your story.  You’re a liar, and I hate you!”

“That I believe it’s just a trick to get me p. 203away to England—that I don’t believe a word of your story. You’re a liar, and I can’t stand you!”

He rose, and, laying one hand on the back of his chair, looked me sternly in the face.

He got up and, placing one hand on the back of his chair, looked me straight in the eye.

“If you were not Benjamin Hardy,” he said, deliberately, “I would thrash you within an inch of your life.”

“If you weren’t Benjamin Hardy,” he said, deliberately, “I would beat you to within an inch of your life.”

The words had no sooner passed his lips than I sprang at him.  I have never been able distinctly to remember what followed.  A curse—a blow—a struggle—a moment of blind fury—a cry—a confusion of tongues—a circle of strange faces.  Then I see Mat lying back in the arms of a bystander; myself trembling and bewildered—the knife dropping from my grasp; blood upon the floor; blood upon my hands; blood upon his shirt.  And then I hear those dreadful words:

The words had barely left his mouth when I lunged at him. I've never been able to clearly recall what happened next. A curse—a punch—a struggle—an instant of blind rage—a scream—a jumble of voices—a ring of unfamiliar faces. Then I see Mat slumped in the arms of someone nearby; I’m shaking and confused—the knife falling from my hand; blood on the floor; blood on my hands; blood on his shirt. And then I hear those horrible words:

“O, Ben, you have murdered me!”

“Oh, Ben, you’ve ruined me!”

He did not die—at least, not there and then.  He was carried to the nearest hospital, and lay for some weeks between life and death.  His case, they said, was difficult and dangerous.  The knife had gone in just below the collarbone, and pierced down into the lungs.  He was not allowed to speak or turn—scarcely to breathe with freedom.  He might not even lift his head to drink.  I sat by him day and night all through that sorrowful time.  I gave up my situation on the railway; I quitted my lodging in the Vicolo Balba; I tried to forget p. 204that such a woman as Gianetta Coneglia had ever drawn breath.  I lived only for Mat; and he tried to live more, I believe, for my sake than his own.  Thus, in the bitter silent hours of pain and penitence, when no hand but mine approached his lips or smoothed his pillow, the old friendship came back with even more than its old trust and faithfulness.  He forgave me, fully and freely; and I would thankfully have given my life for him.

He didn’t die—not at that moment, anyway. He was taken to the nearest hospital and spent several weeks hanging between life and death. They said his condition was challenging and serious. The knife had pierced just below his collarbone and into his lungs. He wasn’t allowed to speak or move—barely even to breathe easily. He couldn’t even lift his head to drink. I stayed by his side day and night throughout that painful time. I quit my job on the railway, gave up my place in the Vicolo Balba, and tried to forget that someone like Gianetta Coneglia had ever existed. I lived only for Mat, and he tried to fight to live more, I think, for my sake than his own. In those bitter, silent hours of suffering and remorse, when no one but me came to his lips or adjusted his pillow, our old friendship returned, even stronger than before, with renewed trust and loyalty. He forgave me completely and willingly; I would have gladly given my life for him.

At length there came one bright spring morning, when, dismissed as convalescent, he tottered out through the hospital gates, leaning on my arm, and feeble as an infant.  He was not cured; neither, as I then learned to my horror and anguish, was it possible that he ever could be cured.  He might live, with care, for some years; but the lungs were injured beyond hope of remedy, and a strong or healthy man he could never be again.  These, spoken aside to me, were the parting words of the chief physician, who advised me to take him further south without delay.

At last, one bright spring morning, after being dismissed as a convalescent, he weakly made his way out through the hospital gates, leaning on my arm and as fragile as an infant. He wasn’t cured; and, as I horrifyingly learned, it was impossible for him to ever be cured. He might live for a few more years with proper care, but his lungs were too damaged for any hope of recovery, and he could never be strong or healthy again. These were the parting words of the chief physician, spoken to me in private, who urged me to take him further south without delay.

I took him to a little coast-town called Rocca, some thirty miles beyond Genoa—a sheltered lonely place along the Riviera, where the sea was even bluer than the sky, and the cliffs were green with strange tropical plants, cacti, and aloes, and Egyptian palms.  Here we lodged in the house of a small tradesman; and Mat, to use his own words, “set to work p. 205at getting well in good earnest.”  But, alas! it was a work which no earnestness could forward.  Day after day he went down to the beach, and sat for hours drinking the sea air and watching the sails that came and went in the offing.  By-and-by he could go no further than the garden of the house in which we lived.  A little later, and he spent his days on a couch beside the open window, waiting patiently for the end.  Ay, for the end!  It had come to that.  He was fading fast, waning with the waning summer, and conscious that the Reaper was at hand.  His whole aim now was to soften the agony of my remorse, and prepare me for what must shortly come.

I took him to a small coastal town called Rocca, about thirty miles past Genoa—a quiet, isolated spot along the Riviera, where the sea was even bluer than the sky, and the cliffs were lush with unusual tropical plants, cacti, aloes, and Egyptian palms. We stayed in the home of a local tradesman; and Mat, to put it in his own words, “started to really work on getting better.” But, unfortunately, it was a struggle that no amount of determination could change. Day after day, he would go down to the beach and sit for hours, breathing in the sea air and watching the sails come and go in the distance. Eventually, he could only manage to go as far as the garden of our house. Soon after, he spent his days on a couch by the open window, waiting patiently for the end. Yes, the end! It had come to that. He was rapidly fading, dwindling with the diminishing summer, and aware that the end was near. His only goal now was to ease the pain of my guilt and prepare me for what was about to happen.

“I would not live longer, if I could,” he said, lying on his couch one summer evening, and looking up to the stars.  “If I had my choice at this moment, I would ask to go.  I should like Gianetta to know that I forgave her.”

“I wouldn’t want to live longer, even if I could,” he said, lying on his couch one summer evening and looking up at the stars. “If I could choose right now, I would want to go. I want Gianetta to know that I forgave her.”

“She shall know it,” I said, trembling suddenly from head to foot.

“She will know it,” I said, trembling all over.

He pressed my hand.

He held my hand.

“And you’ll write to father?”

"And will you write to Dad?"

“I will.”

"Sure thing."

I had drawn a little back, that he might not see the tears raining down my cheeks; but he raised himself on his elbow, and looked round.

I had pulled back a bit so he wouldn't see the tears streaming down my cheeks; but he propped himself up on his elbow and looked around.

“Don’t fret, Ben,” he whispered; laid his p. 206head back wearily upon the pillow—and so died.

“Don’t worry, Ben,” he whispered; laid his p. 206head back tiredly on the pillow—and then died.

 

And this was the end of it.  This was the end of all that made life life to me.  I buried him there, in hearing of the wash of a strange sea on a strange shore.  I stayed by the grave till the priest and the bystanders were gone.  I saw the earth filled in to the last sod, and the gravedigger stamp it down with his feet.  Then, and not till then, I felt that I had lost him for ever—the friend I had loved, and hated, and slain.  Then, and not till then, I knew that all rest, and joy, and hope were over for me.  From that moment my heart hardened within me, and my life was filled with loathing.  Day and night, land and sea, labour and rest, food and sleep, were alike hateful to me.  It was the curse of Cain, and that my brother had pardoned me made it lie none the lighter.  Peace on earth was for me no more, and goodwill towards men was dead in my heart for ever.  Remorse softens some natures; but it poisoned mine.  I hated all mankind; but above all mankind I hated the woman who had come between us two, and ruined both our lives.

And that was the end of it. This was the end of everything that made life meaningful to me. I buried him there, hearing the sound of a strange sea on a strange shore. I stayed by the grave until the priest and the others left. I watched as they filled in the ground to the last bit of soil and the gravedigger packed it down with his feet. It was only then that I realized I had lost him forever—the friend I had loved, hated, and killed. At that moment, I understood that all rest, joy, and hope were gone from my life. From then on, my heart hardened, and my life was filled with disgust. Day and night, land and sea, work and rest, food and sleep, all felt hateful to me. It was like the curse of Cain, and the fact that my brother forgave me didn’t make it any easier to bear. Peace on earth was no longer for me, and goodwill toward others was dead in my heart forever. Remorse softens some people; but it poisoned me. I hated all of humanity; but above all, I hated the woman who had come between us and ruined both our lives.

He had bidden me seek her out, and be the messenger of his forgiveness.  I had sooner have gone down to the port of Genoa and taken upon me the serge cap and shotted chain p. 207of any galley-slave at his toil in the public works; but for all that I did my best to obey him.  I went back, alone and on foot.  I went back, intending to say to her, “Gianetta Coneglia, he forgave you; but God never will.”  But she was gone.  The little shop was let to a fresh occupant; and the neighbours only knew that mother and daughter had left the place quite suddenly, and that Gianetta was supposed to be under the “protection” of the Marchese Loredano.  How I made inquiries here and there—how I heard that they had gone to Naples—and how, being restless and reckless of my time, I worked my passage in a French steamer, and followed her—how, having found the sumptuous villa that was now hers, I learned that she had left there some ten days and gone to Paris, where the Marchese was ambassador for the Two Sicilies—how, working my passage back again to Marseilles, and thence, in part by the river and in part by the rail, I made my way to Paris—how, day after day, I paced the streets and the parks, watched at the ambassador’s gates, followed his carriage, and at last, after weeks of waiting, discovered her address—how, having written to request an interview, her servants spurned me from her door and flung my letter in my face—how, looking up at her windows, I then, instead of forgiving, solemnly cursed her with the bitterest curses p. 208my tongue could devise—and how, this done, I shook the dust of Paris from my feet, and became a wanderer upon the face of the earth, are facts which I have now no space to tell.

He had asked me to find her and deliver his message of forgiveness. I would have rather gone down to the port of Genoa and put on the ragged cap and heavy chain of any galley slave working on public projects; but despite that, I did my best to follow his orders. I walked back alone, on foot. I planned to tell her, “Gianetta Coneglia, he forgave you; but God never will.” But she was gone. The small shop had a new tenant; and the neighbors only knew that mother and daughter had left abruptly, and that Gianetta was believed to be under the “protection” of Marchese Loredano. I made inquiries here and there—I learned they had gone to Naples—and being restless and reckless with my time, I worked my passage on a French steamer to follow her—I found the lavish villa that was now hers, but learned she had left about ten days prior for Paris, where the Marchese was the ambassador for the Two Sicilies—then I worked my passage back to Marseilles, and from there, partly by river and partly by train, made my way to Paris—day after day, I walked the streets and parks, waited at the ambassador’s gate, followed his carriage, and finally, after weeks of waiting, discovered her address—when I wrote to request a meeting, her servants shoved me away from her door and threw my letter back in my face—looking up at her windows, instead of forgiving her, I solemnly cursed her with the most bitter curses I could think of—and after that, I left Paris and became a wanderer across the earth, which I no longer have the space to describe.

The next six or eight years of my life were shifting and unsettled enough.  A morose and restless man, I took employment here and there, as opportunity offered, turning my hand to many things, and caring little what I earned, so long as the work was hard and the change incessant.  First of all I engaged myself as chief engineer in one of the French steamers plying between Marseilles and Constantinople.  At Constantinople I changed to one of the Austrian Lloyd’s boats, and worked for some time to and from Alexandria, Jaffa, and those parts.  After that, I fell in with a party of Mr. Layard’s men at Cairo, and so went up the Nile and took a turn at the excavations of the mound of Nimroud.  Then I became a working engineer on the new desert line between Alexandria and Suez; and by-and-by I worked my passage out to Bombay, and took service as an engine fitter on one of the great Indian railways.  I stayed a long time in India; that is to say, I stayed nearly two years, which was a long time for me; and I might not even have left so soon, but for the war that was declared just then with Russia.  That tempted me.  For I loved danger and hardship as other men love safety and ease; p. 209and as for my life, I had sooner have parted from it than kept it, any day.  So I came straight back to England; betook myself to Portsmouth, where my testimonials at once procured me the sort of berth I wanted.  I went out to the Crimea in the engine-room of one of her Majesty’s war steamers.

The next six or eight years of my life were a whirlwind and pretty chaotic. A gloomy and restless guy, I took jobs here and there as opportunities came up, doing all sorts of work and not really caring about how much I earned, as long as the work was tough and the changes kept coming. First, I got a job as the chief engineer on one of the French steamers traveling between Marseilles and Constantinople. In Constantinople, I switched to one of the Austrian Lloyd’s boats and worked for a while between Alexandria, Jaffa, and those areas. After that, I connected with a crew from Mr. Layard's team in Cairo, which led me up the Nile to help with the excavations at the mound of Nimroud. Then I worked as an engineer on the new desert railway between Alexandria and Suez; eventually, I managed to secure passage to Bombay and took a job as an engine fitter on one of the major Indian railways. I stayed in India for quite a while; nearly two years, which felt long for me, and I might not have left so soon if it weren't for the war that was about to break out with Russia. That drew me in. I craved danger and hardship like some people crave safety and comfort; honestly, I would have rather given up my life than cling to it any day. So I headed straight back to England and went to Portsmouth, where my references quickly landed me the type of job I wanted. I went out to the Crimea in the engine room of one of Her Majesty’s war steamers.

I served with the fleet, of course, while the war lasted; and when it was over, went wandering off again, rejoicing in my liberty.  This time I went to Canada, and after working on a railway then in progress near the American frontier, I presently passed over into the States; journeyed from north to south; crossed the Rocky Mountains; tried a month or two of life in the gold country; and then, being seized with a sudden, aching, unaccountable longing to revisit that solitary grave so far away on the Italian coast, I turned my face once more towards Europe.

I served with the fleet during the war, of course, and when it ended, I went off to explore again, happy to be free. This time I went to Canada, and after working on a railway that was being built near the American border, I soon crossed into the States. I traveled from north to south, crossed the Rocky Mountains, spent a month or two trying life in the gold country, and then, suddenly overcome by a deep, inexplicable desire to revisit that lonely grave far away on the Italian coast, I set my sights back towards Europe.

Poor little grave!  I found it rank with weeds, the cross half shattered, the inscription half effaced.  It was as if no one had loved him, or remembered him.  I went back to the house in which we had lodged together.  The same people were still living there, and made me kindly welcome.  I stayed with them for some weeks.  I weeded, and planted, and trimmed the grave with my own hands, and set up a fresh cross in pure white marble.  It was the first season of rest that I had known p. 210since I laid him there; and when at last I shouldered my knapsack and set forth again to battle with the world, I promised myself that, God willing, I would creep back to Rocca, when my days drew near to ending, and be buried by his side.

Poor little grave! I found it overgrown with weeds, the cross broken, the inscription barely legible. It was as if no one had loved him or remembered him. I went back to the house where we had stayed together. The same people were still living there and welcomed me warmly. I stayed with them for several weeks. I cleared the weeds, planted flowers, and tended to the grave myself, and I put up a new cross made of pure white marble. It was the first real season of rest I had experienced since I laid him to rest there; and when I finally shouldered my backpack and set out again to face the world, I promised myself that, God willing, I would return to Rocca when my time was coming to an end and be buried beside him.

From hence, being, perhaps, a little less inclined than formerly for very distant parts, and willing to keep within reach of that grave, I went no further than Mantua, where I engaged myself as an engine-driver on the line, then not long completed, between that city and Venice.  Somehow, although I had been trained to the working engineering, I preferred in these days to earn my bread by driving.  I liked the excitement of it, the sense of power, the rush of the air, the roar of the fire, the flitting of the landscape.  Above all, I enjoyed to drive a night express.  The worse the weather, the better it suited with my sullen temper.  For I was as hard, and harder than ever.  The years had done nothing to soften me.  They had only confirmed all that was blackest and bitterest in my heart.

From then on, feeling a bit less inclined than before to venture to far-off places and wanting to stay close to that grave, I went no further than Mantua, where I took a job as a train driver on the recently completed line between that city and Venice. Despite being trained in engineering, I preferred, at this time, to earn my living by driving. I enjoyed the thrill of it, the feeling of power, the rush of the air, the roar of the fire, and the passing scenery. More than anything, I loved driving a night express. The worse the weather, the better it matched my moody temperament. I was as tough, and even tougher than before. The years had done nothing to soften me; they had only solidified everything dark and bitter in my heart.

I continued pretty faithful to the Mantua line, and had been working on it steadily for more than seven months when that which I am now about to relate took place.

I stuck pretty closely to the Mantua line and had been working on it consistently for over seven months when what I'm about to share happened.

It was in the month of March.  The weather had been unsettled for some days past, and the nights stormy; and at one point along the p. 211line, near Ponte di Brenta, the waters had risen and swept away some seventy yards of embankment.  Since this accident, the trains had all been obliged to stop at a certain spot between Padua and Ponte di Brenta, and the passengers, with their luggage, had thence to be transported in all kinds of vehicles, by a circuitous country road, to the nearest station on the other side of the gap, where another train and engine awaited them.  This, of course, caused great confusion and annoyance, put all our time-tables wrong, and subjected the public to a large amount of inconvenience.  In the meanwhile an army of navvies was drafted to the spot, and worked day and night to repair the damage.  At this time I was driving two through trains each day; namely, one from Mantua to Venice in the early morning, and a return train from Venice to Mantua in the afternoon—a tolerably full day’s work, covering about one hundred and ninety miles of ground, and occupying between ten and eleven hours.  I was therefore not best pleased when, on the third or fourth day after the accident, I was informed that, in addition to my regular allowance of work, I should that evening be required to drive a special train to Venice.  This special train, consisting of an engine, a single carriage, and a break-van, was to leave the Mantua platform at eleven; at Padua the passengers were to alight and find post-chaises waiting to convey them to Ponte p. 212di Brenta; at Ponte di Brenta another engine, carriage, and break-van were to be in readiness.  I was charged to accompany them throughout.

It was March. The weather had been unstable for several days, and the nights were stormy; at one point near Ponte di Brenta, the waters had risen and washed away about seventy yards of the embankment. Since this incident, all trains had to stop at a specific spot between Padua and Ponte di Brenta, and passengers, along with their luggage, had to be transported in various vehicles via a roundabout country road to the nearest station on the other side of the gap, where another train and engine were waiting for them. This, of course, caused a lot of confusion and frustration, messed up all our schedules, and resulted in significant inconvenience for the public. Meanwhile, a team of workers was sent to the site, working day and night to fix the damage. At that time, I was driving two through trains each day: one from Mantua to Venice in the early morning, and a return train from Venice to Mantua in the afternoon—a pretty full day’s work, covering about one hundred and ninety miles and taking between ten and eleven hours. So, I wasn’t exactly thrilled when, on the third or fourth day after the accident, I was told that, in addition to my usual workload, I would also be needed to drive a special train to Venice that evening. This special train, consisting of an engine, a single carriage, and a break-van, was set to leave the Mantua platform at eleven; at Padua, the passengers would get off and find post-chaises waiting to take them to Ponte di Brenta; and at Ponte di Brenta, another engine, carriage, and break-van were to be ready. I was assigned to accompany them the entire way.

“Corpo di Bacco,” said the clerk who gave me my orders, “you need not look so black, man.  You are certain of a handsome gratuity.  Do you know who goes with you?”

“Corpo di Bacco,” said the clerk who gave me my orders, “you don’t need to look so gloomy, man. You’re sure to get a nice tip. Do you know who’s going with you?”

“Not I.”

"Not me."

“Not you, indeed!  Why, it’s the Duca Loredano, the Neapolitan ambassador.”

“Not you, for sure! Why, it’s the Duke Loredano, the Neapolitan ambassador.”

“Loredano!” I stammered.  “What Loredano?  There was a Marchese—”

“Loredano!” I stammered. “What Loredano? There was a Marchese—”

“Certo.  He was the Marchese Loredano some years ago; but he has come into his dukedom since then.”

“Sure. He was the Marchese Loredano a few years ago, but he has become a duke since then.”

“He must be a very old man by this time.”

“He’s got to be really old by now.”

“Yes, he is old; but what of that?  He is as hale, and bright, and stately as ever.  You have seen him before?”

“Yes, he’s old; but so what? He’s just as healthy, lively, and dignified as ever. Have you seen him before?”

“Yes,” I said, turning away; “I have seen him—years ago.”

“Yes,” I said, turning away; “I saw him—years ago.”

“You have heard of his marriage?”

"Did you hear about his marriage?"

I shook my head.

I shook my head.

The clerk chuckled, rubbed his hands, and shrugged his shoulders.

The clerk laughed, rubbed his hands together, and shrugged his shoulders.

“An extraordinary affair,” he said.  “Made a tremendous esclandre at the time.  He married his mistress—quite a common, vulgar girl—a Genoese—very handsome; but not received, of course.  Nobody visits her.”

“An extraordinary situation,” he said. “Caused a huge scandal back then. He married his mistress—she was a pretty ordinary, common girl—a Genoese—very attractive; but, of course, she’s not accepted. Nobody visits her.”

p. 213“Married her!” I exclaimed.  “Impossible.”

p. 213“Married her!” I said. “Not a chance.”

“True, I assure you.”

“Really, I promise you.”

I put my hand to my head.  I felt as if I had had a fall or a blow.

I put my hand on my head. I felt like I had taken a fall or gotten hit.

“Does she—does she go to-night?” I faltered.

“Is she—is she leaving tonight?” I hesitated.

“O dear, yes—goes everywhere with him—never lets him out of her sight.  You’ll see her—la bella Duchessa!”

“O dear, yes—she goes everywhere with him—never lets him out of her sight. You’ll see her—the beautiful Duchess!”

With this my informant laughed, and rubbed his hands again, and went back to his office.

With that, my informant laughed, rubbed his hands again, and returned to his office.

The day went by, I scarcely know how, except that my whole soul was in a tumult of rage and bitterness.  I returned from my afternoon’s work about 7.25, and at 10.30 I was once again at the station.  I had examined the engine; given instructions to the Fochista, or stoker, about the fire; seen to the supply of oil; and got all in readiness, when, just as I was about to compare my watch with the clock in the ticket-office, a hand was laid upon my arm, and a voice in my ear said:

The day passed by, and I hardly know how, except that I was consumed by a whirlwind of anger and resentment. I got back from my afternoon work around 7:25, and by 10:30, I was back at the station. I had checked the engine, given instructions to the stoker about the fire, ensured there was enough oil, and had everything ready when, just as I was about to check my watch against the clock in the ticket office, a hand touched my arm, and a voice whispered in my ear:

“Are you the engine-driver who is going on with this special train?”

“Are you the engineer who is operating this special train?”

I had never seen the speaker before.  He was a small, dark man, muffled up about the throat, with blue glasses, a large black beard, and his hat drawn low upon his eyes.

I had never seen the speaker before. He was a short, dark-skinned man, bundled up around the neck, wearing blue glasses, a large black beard, and his hat pulled down low over his eyes.

“You are a poor man, I suppose,” he said, in a quick, eager whisper, “and, like other poor men, would not object to be better off.  p. 214Would you like to earn a couple of thousand florins?”

“You're a broke guy, I guess,” he said in a fast, eager whisper, “and like other broke guys, you wouldn't mind being in a better position. p. 214Would you be interested in earning a couple of thousand florins?”

“In what way?”

“How so?”

“Hush!  You are to stop at Padua, are you not, and to go on again at Ponte di Brenta?”

“Hush! You’re stopping in Padua, right? And then you’ll continue on at Ponte di Brenta?”

I nodded.

I agreed.

“Suppose you did nothing of the kind.  Suppose, instead of turning off the steam, you jump off the engine, and let the train run on?”

“Imagine you didn’t do that at all. What if, instead of shutting off the steam, you just jumped off the engine and let the train keep going?”

“Impossible.  There are seventy yards of embankment gone, and—”

“Impossible. There are seventy yards of embankment missing, and—”

“Basta!  I know that.  Save yourself, and let the train run on.  It would be nothing but an accident.”

“Enough! I know that. Take care of yourself, and let the train keep going. It would just be an accident.”

I turned hot and cold; I trembled; my heart beat fast, and my breath failed.

I felt a rush of heat and chills; I shook; my heart raced, and I struggled to catch my breath.

“Why do you tempt me?” I faltered.

“Why are you tempting me?” I hesitated.

“For Italy’s sake,” he whispered; “for liberty’s sake.  I know you are no Italian; but, for all that, you may be a friend.  This Loredano is one of his country’s bitterest enemies.  Stay, here are the two thousand florins.”

“for Italy’s sake,” he whispered; “for liberty’s sake. I know you’re not Italian; but still, you could be a friend. This Loredano is one of his country’s fiercest enemies. Wait, here are the two thousand florins.”

I thrust his hand back fiercely.

I pushed his hand away forcefully.

“No—no,” I said.  “No blood-money.  If I do it, I do it neither for Italy nor for money; but for vengeance.”

“No—no,” I said. “No blood money. If I do it, I’m not doing it for Italy or for money; I’m doing it for revenge.”

“For vengeance!” he repeated.

"For revenge!" he repeated.

At this moment the signal was given for backing up to the platform.  I sprang to my place upon the engine without another word.  p. 215When I again looked towards the spot where he had been standing, the stranger was gone.

At that moment, the signal was given to back up to the platform. I jumped onto the engine without saying another word. p. 215 When I looked back to where he had been standing, the stranger was gone.

I saw them take their places—Duke and Duchess, secretary and priest, valet and maid.  I saw the station-master bow them into the carriage, and stand, bareheaded, beside the door.  I could not distinguish their faces; the platform was too dusk, and the glare from the engine fire too strong; but I recognised her stately figure, and the poise of her head.  Had I not been told who she was, I should have known her by those traits alone.  Then the guard’s whistle shrilled out, and the station-master made his last bow; I turned the steam on; and we started.

I watched them take their places—Duke and Duchess, secretary and priest, valet and maid. I saw the station-master bow them into the carriage and stand, hat in hand, beside the door. I couldn't make out their faces; the platform was too dark, and the glare from the engine fire was too bright; but I recognized her elegant figure and the way she held her head. If I hadn't been told who she was, I would have known her just by those features alone. Then the guard's whistle blew sharply, and the station-master made his last bow; I turned on the steam, and we set off.

My blood was on fire.  I no longer trembled or hesitated.  I felt as if every nerve was iron, and every pulse instinct with deadly purpose.  She was in my power, and I would be revenged.  She should die—she, for whom I had stained my soul with my friend’s blood!  She should die, in the plenitude of her wealth and her beauty, and no power upon earth should save her!

My blood was on fire. I no longer shook or hesitated. I felt like every nerve was made of steel, and every heartbeat was filled with deadly intent. She was in my control, and I would get my revenge. She would die—she, for whom I had tainted my soul with my friend’s blood! She would die, in the height of her wealth and beauty, and no one on earth could save her!

The stations flew past.  I put on more steam; I bade the fireman heap in the coke, and stir the blazing mass.  I would have outstripped the wind, had it been possible.  Faster and faster—hedges and trees, bridges and stations, flashing past—villages no sooner seen than gone—telegraph wires twisting, and p. 216dipping, and twining themselves in one, with the awful swiftness of our pace!  Faster and faster, till the fireman at my side looks white and scared, and refuses to add more fuel to the furnace.  Faster and faster, till the wind rushes in our faces and drives the breath back upon our lips.

The stations zoomed by. I pushed the throttle harder; I told the fireman to load in more coal and stir the fire. I would have outpaced the wind if I could. Faster and faster—hedges and trees, bridges and stations, racing by—villages barely seen before they disappeared—telegraph wires swirling and p. 216twisting together, all with the terrifying speed we were going! Faster and faster, until the fireman next to me looked pale and scared and refused to put more fuel in the furnace. Faster and faster, until the wind blasted into our faces and pushed the breath back onto our lips.

I would have scorned to save myself.  I meant to die with the rest.  Mad as I was—and I believe from my very soul that I was utterly mad for the time—I felt a passing pang of pity for the old man and his suite.  I would have spared the poor fellow at my side, too, if I could; but the pace at which we were going made escape impossible.

I would have looked down on saving myself. I intended to die with the others. As crazy as I was—and I truly believe I was completely mad at that moment—I felt a brief surge of pity for the old man and his group. I would have helped the poor guy next to me too, if I could; but the speed we were moving made escape impossible.

Vicenza was passed—a mere confused vision of lights.  Pojana flew by.  At Padua, but nine miles distant, our passengers were to alight.  I saw the fireman’s face turned upon me in remonstrance; I saw his lips move, though I could not hear a word; I saw his expression change suddenly from remonstrance to a deadly terror, and then—merciful Heaven! then, for the first time, I saw that he and I were no longer alone upon the engine.

Vicenza went by—a blur of lights. Pojana zipped past. At Padua, just nine miles away, our passengers were set to get off. I noticed the fireman's face turned toward me in protest; I could see his lips moving, though I couldn't hear anything; his expression shifted suddenly from protest to sheer terror, and then—oh my God!—for the first time, I realized that he and I were no longer the only ones on the engine.

There was a third man—a third man standing on my right hand, as the fireman was standing on my left—a tall, stalwart man, with short curling hair, and a flat Scotch cap upon his head.  As I fell back in the first shock of surprise, he stepped nearer; took my place at p. 217the engine, and turned the steam off.  I opened my lips to speak to him; he turned his head slowly, and looked me in the face.

There was a third man—standing to my right, while the fireman was on my left—a tall, strong man, with short curly hair and a flat Scottish cap on his head. As I stumbled back in shock, he stepped closer, took my place at the engine, and turned off the steam. I opened my mouth to talk to him; he slowly turned his head and looked me in the eyes.

Matthew Price!

Matthew Price!

I uttered one long wild cry, flung my arms wildly up above my head, and fell as if I had been smitten with an axe.

I let out a long, wild scream, threw my arms up above my head, and collapsed as if I had been struck by an axe.

 

I am prepared for the objections that may be made to my story.  I expect, as a matter of course, to be told that this was an optical illusion, or that I was suffering from pressure on the brain, or even that I laboured under an attack of temporary insanity.  I have heard all these arguments before, and, if I may be forgiven for saying so, I have no desire to hear them again.  My own mind has been made up upon this subject for many a year.  All that I can say—all that I know is—that Matthew Price came back from the dead to save my soul and the lives of those whom I, in my guilty rage, would have hurried to destruction.  I believe this as I believe in the mercy of Heaven and the forgiveness of repentant sinners.

I’m ready for the objections that might be raised about my story. I expect, as usual, to hear that it was just an optical illusion, or that I was dealing with pressure on the brain, or even that I was having a moment of temporary insanity. I’ve heard all these arguments before, and if I may say so, I really don’t want to hear them again. My mind has been made up about this for many years. All I can say—all I know—is that Matthew Price came back from the dead to save my soul and the lives of those I, in my guilty rage, would have rushed to ruin. I believe this as strongly as I believe in the mercy of Heaven and the forgiveness of repentant sinners.

the end

the end


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