This is a modern-English version of The Gay Adventure: A Romance, originally written by Bird, Richard. It has been thoroughly updated, including changes to sentence structure, words, spelling, and grammar—to ensure clarity for contemporary readers, while preserving the original spirit and nuance. If you click on a paragraph, you will see the original text that we modified, and you can toggle between the two versions.

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THE GAY ADVENTURE

A ROMANCE

By RICHARD BIRD

Author of THE FORWARD IN LOVE

WITH FRONTISPIECE BY
F. VAUX WILSON

INDIANAPOLIS
THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY
PUBLISHERS

COPYRIGHT 1914
THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY

PRESS OF
BRAUNWORTH & CO.
BOOKBINDERS AND PRINTERS
BROOKLYN, N. Y.


TO BETTY

My book the Critics may abhor—
My book may be loathed by the Critics—
The Public, too. But, all the same,
The public, as well. Still,
This Page at least is Golden, for
This page is at least valuable, because
It bears the imprint of your name.
Your name is stamped on it.

It was Beatrice at last!


CONTENTS


THE GAY ADVENTURE


CHAPTER I

THE IMPOVERISHED HERO AND THE SURPASSING DAMSEL

Mr. Lionel Mortimer was a young gentleman of few intentions and no private means. Good-humored, by no means ill-looking, and with engaging manners, he was the type of man of whom one would have prophesied great things. His natural gaiety and address were more than enough to carry him over the early stages of acquaintanceship, but subsequent meetings were doomed to end in disillusion. His cheerful outlook on life would be as much to your taste as ever; but the want of a definite aim and an obvious inability to convert his talents into cash made you shake your head doubtfully. A charming fellow, of course, but unpractical ... the kind of man who is popular with all but match-making mothers.

Mr. Lionel Mortimer was a young man with few ambitions and no money of his own. He was good-natured, certainly not unattractive, and had a pleasant demeanor, making him the kind of guy people expected great things from. His natural cheerfulness and charm were enough to help him get through the initial stages of making friends, but later encounters were likely to lead to disappointment. His optimistic view on life would still be appealing, but his lack of direction and clear inability to turn his skills into income would make you doubt his future. A delightful guy, no question, but impractical ... the sort of person who is liked by everyone except matchmaking mothers.

He lived in two rooms in an obscure street off the Strand, and at the time when we make his acquaintance he has just finished a meal that stamps the lower middle classes and the impecunious—to wit, high tea. For the benefit of gastronomers it may be stated that it included herrings, a loaf of bread, some butter of repellent aspect, and strawberry jam. Lionel has lighted his pipe and seated himself at the window to enjoy as much of a June evening as can be enjoyable in a London back street. He has not emitted three puffs of smoke before a tap at the door heralds the entrance of his landlady.

He lived in two rooms on a little-known street off the Strand, and just as we meet him, he has just finished a meal that defines the lower middle class and those short on cash—high tea. For food enthusiasts, it’s worth noting that his meal consisted of herring, a loaf of bread, some unappealing-looking butter, and strawberry jam. Lionel has lit his pipe and settled at the window to appreciate what little of a June evening can be enjoyed in a London back street. He hasn’t taken three puffs of smoke before a knock at the door announces the arrival of his landlady.

Mrs. Barker, a woman of commanding presence and dressed in rusty black, came into the room. She did not utter a word, not even the conventional remark that it was a fine night or that the evenings would soon begin to draw in now. With a funereal but businesslike demeanor she began to remove the débris of the meal, at intervals giving vent to a rasping cough or a malignant sniff. Of her presence Lionel seemed oblivious, for he continued sitting with his back to the door, gazing with apparent interest into the street. This, perhaps, was curious, for the street was but a lane with little traffic and no features worthy of note. Nor was the building opposite calculated to inspire the most sedulous observer, being merely the blank wall of a warehouse. Not a single window relieved the monotony, usually so painful to the artist or the adventurer. And yet Lionel puffed at his pipe, gazing silently in front of him as if at a masterpiece by Whistler.

Mrs. Barker, a woman with a commanding presence dressed in faded black, entered the room. She didn’t say a word, not even the usual comment about it being a nice night or that the evenings would soon start getting shorter. With a somber yet efficient attitude, she began clearing away the remnants of the meal, occasionally coughing harshly or giving a sharp sniff. Lionel seemed completely unaware of her presence, as he continued sitting with his back to the door, looking with apparent interest out into the street. This was puzzling, as the street was just a narrow lane with little traffic and nothing noteworthy to see. The building across the way didn’t help either; it was just the plain wall of a warehouse. There wasn’t a single window to break the dullness, which would usually be agonizing for an artist or an adventurer. Yet Lionel puffed on his pipe, staring silently ahead as if he were admiring a masterpiece by Whistler.

When the landlady had transferred the tea-things to a tray, shaken the crumbs from the table-cloth into the empty grate and folded it, she nerved herself for a direct attack. Placing her arms akimbo—an attitude usually denoting truculent defiance or a pleasurable sense of injustice—she pronounced her lodger's name. Lionel started, as if made aware of her presence for the first time. He took his pipe from his mouth and turned with a pleasant smile.

When the landlady put the tea items on a tray, shook the crumbs from the tablecloth into the empty fireplace, and folded it up, she steeled herself for a straightforward confrontation. With her hands on her hips—an expression usually showing bold defiance or a satisfying sense of being wronged—she called out her lodger's name. Lionel jumped, as if he had just noticed her for the first time. He took his pipe out of his mouth and turned to her with a friendly smile.

"Good evening, Mrs. Barker," he said with careful politeness. "A fine night, is it not?"

"Good evening, Mrs. Barker," he said politely. "It's a nice night, isn't it?"

She assented with an ill grace. Without giving her time to add to her appreciation, Lionel continued in suave but enthusiastic tones:

She agreed with reluctance. Without giving her a chance to express her gratitude, Lionel continued in a smooth yet enthusiastic manner:

"Oblige me, Mrs. Barker, by observing the manner in which the sun strikes the opposite wall. Notice the sharp outline of that chimney-pot against the sky. Remark the bold sweep of that piece of spouting—a true secession curve of which the molder was probably completely ignorant. Again, the background! That dull gray monotone——"

"Please do me a favor, Mrs. Barker, and take a look at how the sunlight hits the wall across from us. See the clear outline of that chimney pot against the sky? Check out the bold curve of that piece of gutter—a perfect example of a curve that the mold maker probably had no clue about. And let’s not forget the background! That dull gray monotone—"

This rhapsody was interrupted by Mrs. Barker, whose artistic education had consisted in a course of free-hand drawing in a board school and a study of the colored plates issued by the Christmas magazines. It was hardly to be expected that she should wax enthusiastic over the warehouse wall.

This rhapsody was interrupted by Mrs. Barker, whose artistic education had mostly come from a free-hand drawing class at a public school and a study of the colorful pictures in Christmas magazines. It was hardly surprising that she wouldn't get excited about the warehouse wall.

"It's no good torkin, Mr. Mortimer," she said; "I want my rent."

"It's no use talking, Mr. Mortimer," she said; "I want my rent."

"But how reasonable!" returned Lionel with increased brightness. "How much does it come to? Certain tokens of copper—silver—gold—with some trifling additions for food, fire, etc.——"

"But how reasonable!" Lionel replied with more enthusiasm. "How much does it add up to? A few coins of copper—silver—gold—with some small extras for food, heat, etc."

"One pahnd three sempence for this week," snapped Mrs. Barker. After a pause she added constrainedly, "If yer please."

"One pound three pence for this week," snapped Mrs. Barker. After a pause, she added awkwardly, "If you please."

"Why! you are even more reasonable than I expected," cried Lionel. "If I please! How could a man refuse anything after so polite a prelude? If I please! My rent, if I please, is one pound, three and sevenpence; and I must admit that the sum is paltry. If I please to exist (and up to the present I have been delighted to fall in with the schemes of Providence) I can do so for some twenty-four shillings a week. It includes," he added hopefully, "the washing?"

"Wow! You're even more reasonable than I thought," Lionel exclaimed. "If I want! How could anyone turn down anything after such a polite introduction? If I want! My rent, if I want, is one pound, three shillings, and seven pence; and I have to say, that amount is pretty small. If I want to keep living (and so far, I've been happy to go along with what fate has planned), I can do that for about twenty-four shillings a week. It includes," he added hopefully, "the laundry?"

She nodded grimly and stretched out her hand. Lionel, with an easy smile, waved her to the door.

She nodded solemnly and reached out her hand. Lionel, with a relaxed smile, gestured for her to go to the door.

"To-morrow, Mrs. Barker, if you please. At the moment I regret to say that my funds do not amount to the necessary sum. To-morrow I make no doubt that——"

"Tomorrow, Mrs. Barker, if you don’t mind. Right now, I’m sorry to say that I don’t have enough money to cover the required amount. Tomorrow, I have no doubt that——"

Mrs. Barker interrupted with brisk invective. It appeared that Lionel was several weeks already in arrears. She, it seemed, was a lone widow, earning her bread by the sweat of her brow, and she would not be put upon. The position had become intolerable: either he must pay his rent or leave the next morning.

Mrs. Barker cut in with sharp complaints. It turned out that Lionel was already several weeks behind on his rent. She was a single widow, working hard to make a living, and she wouldn’t be taken advantage of. The situation had become unbearable: he either had to pay his rent or move out by the next morning.

"Let us consider the state of affairs," said Lionel, unruffled. "You, it appears, need your money—or rather, my money—and I can not gainsay the moral claim. You have attended to my simple wants in a manner beyond praise, and I would cheerfully pay you your weight in gold (after the pleasing custom in the East) had I the precious ore. But at the moment my capital"—he searched his pockets—"amounts to sixpence ha'penny; hence the deplorable impasse. My profession holds out no prospect of immediate or adequate reward: briefs are lacking and editors slow to recognize merit. I have pawned such of my wardrobe as is not necessary to support the illusion of an independent gentleman. What do you suggest as a solution of our difficulties? It is repugnant to both of us that I should live on your charity. I am open to any bright idea."

"Let's take a look at the situation," said Lionel, calm as ever. "It seems you need your money—or rather, my money—and I can't argue against your rightful claim. You've taken care of my basic needs in a way that's truly commendable, and I'd gladly pay you your weight in gold (like the nice custom in the East) if I had any gold to give. But right now, my total funds"—he rummaged through his pockets—"add up to sixpence ha'penny; hence the unfortunate impasse. My job doesn’t offer any chance for immediate or decent payment: I'm out of work and editors are slow to see talent. I've pawned whatever clothes I can that aren't essential to maintain the façade of an independent gentleman. What do you suggest we do about our troubles? It's uncomfortable for both of us that I should rely on your charity. I'm open to any bright ideas."

Unluckily the landlady was not an imaginative woman. She could suggest nothing, save that Lionel should pay his rent or leave. The method of raising money was left entirely to him, but the necessity was insisted on in forcible terms.

Unfortunately, the landlady wasn't a creative person. She couldn't suggest anything except that Lionel should either pay his rent or move out. It was entirely up to him to find a way to raise the money, but she was very firm about the need for it.

"An ultimatum?" said the lodger thoughtfully. "Well, I can not blame you. As you have no illuminating schemes, Mrs. Barker, I must rely on myself. But rest assured that you shall be paid. What! I am young and strong; my clothes, thanks to judicious mending and a light hand with the brush, will pass muster; we are in London, the richest city in the world. I will go out and look for a fairy godmother."

"An ultimatum?" said the lodger thoughtfully. "Well, I can't blame you. Since you don't have any bright ideas, Mrs. Barker, I have to depend on myself. But don’t worry, you will get paid. What! I’m young and strong; my clothes, thanks to some smart repairs and a bit of care, look fine; we’re in London, the wealthiest city in the world. I’ll go out and search for a fairy godmother."

At this resolve Mrs. Barker broke into cries of protest. With a feminine distrust of her own sex she declared that no such creature should pass her threshold. For fifty years she had lived respectable, and it was her firm intention to die in the same persuasion. Lionel raised a deprecating hand.

At this, Mrs. Barker burst into cries of protest. With a feminine distrust of her own gender, she declared that no such person should enter her home. For fifty years, she had lived respectably, and it was her strong intention to die with the same belief. Lionel raised a hand in a gesture of protest.

"You mistake me," he said in gentle reproof. "It was but a manner of speaking inspired by the recollection of Cinderella. Being, however, the masculine equivalent of that lady of romance (or shall we say, 'Lob Lie-by-the-Fire'?) and out of deference to your sense of propriety, I will strive to acquire a fairy godfather. Till to-morrow, then, Mrs. Barker."

"You have misunderstood me," he said softly. "It was just a way of speaking inspired by the memory of Cinderella. However, being the male equivalent of that romantic lady (or should we say, 'Lob Lie-by-the-Fire'?) and out of respect for your sense of propriety, I will try to find a fairy godfather. Until tomorrow, then, Mrs. Barker."

He rose and politely held the door open. The landlady, carrying the tray and table-cloth, left the room in dudgeon.

He stood up and politely held the door open. The landlady, carrying the tray and tablecloth, left the room in a huff.

As soon as she had gone Lionel's face lost something of its optimism, and he began to whistle a tune in a minor key. It was a music-hall refrain, originally scored in quick time and the major clef, a gay lilt of the streets. Modulated by Lionel, under the depressing influence of Mrs. Barker, it became a dirge, incredibly painful to the ear. This even the whistler recognized after a few moments, and with a laugh at himself and his misfortunes he seized his hat and went out.

As soon as she left, Lionel's face lost some of its cheerfulness, and he started to whistle a tune in a minor key. It was a music-hall refrain, originally played in a lively tempo and a major key, a cheerful song from the streets. But under the heavy influence of Mrs. Barker, it turned into a dirge, painfully gloomy to listen to. Even the whistler realized this after a moment and, laughing at himself and his bad luck, grabbed his hat and walked out.

He was by no means clear as to his immediate intentions. Save that his urgent need was money he had no definite idea or plan. How to compass the few pounds necessary to discharge his debt and make sure of a roof was at present beyond his wit, seeing that the situations for men like him are not picked up in a moment. He had been expensively educated at a public school and Oxford, and had a bowing acquaintance with the classics and a tolerable knowledge of law. For three years after taking his degree he had led a pleasant life, eating dinners, reading law and writing. By his pen he had made some sixty pounds a year; by the law—nothing. His father had given him an allowance while he lived, but eighteen months previously his business had failed and the consequent worry had driven him into the grave. His wife had died in giving Lionel birth. After his father's death Lionel perforce had put forth more strenuous efforts. He had even written a novel and sold it for thirty pounds. One or two plays lay in his desk or managers' muniment-chests, and a number of pot-boilers were soliciting the favorable consideration of callous editors. It had been a precarious though interesting existence, but he had kept his head above water until the last few weeks. Now he was standing on the curb in the Strand, wondering amiably what he should do.

He wasn't at all clear about his immediate plans. All he knew was that he desperately needed money; beyond that, he had no concrete ideas or strategies. Figuring out how to get the few pounds required to pay off his debt and secure a place to stay was currently beyond his understanding, especially since jobs for guys like him aren't readily available. He had received a costly education at a public school and Oxford, and had a passing familiarity with the classics and a decent grasp of law. For three years after earning his degree, he had lived a comfortable life, dining out, studying law, and writing. He had made about sixty pounds a year through his writing but nothing from law. His father had given him an allowance while he was alive, but eighteen months ago, his father’s business collapsed, and the stress of it all had pushed him to the grave. His mother had died giving birth to Lionel. After his father's death, Lionel had to try much harder. He had even written a novel and sold it for thirty pounds. One or two plays were stuffed in his desk or with theater managers, and a number of quick scripts were waiting for the indifferent attention of cold-hearted editors. It had been a risky but interesting life, but he had managed to stay afloat until the past few weeks. Now he was standing on the curb in the Strand, wondering cheerfully what he should do next.

"My best chance," he thought, watching the stream of traffic that never failed to fascinate, "would be to write a loathsome article, topical, snappy and bright, and try to sell it for spot cash. I do not think it would be much good studying the advertisements and applying for a post as clerk or secretary. I hate the notion of being a clerk.... There is envelope-addressing, I believe, but I write a villainous hand ... nor do I care to call upon my friends and expose my unhappy condition...." (Since his father's death Lionel had naturally given up his old way of life and dropped out of his usual milieu.) ... "No; I think the loathsome article is clearly indicated. What shall I write about? 'How It Feels to be Out in the Streets?'... 'The Psychology of Landladies.'... 'At a Loose End—A Curbstone Study.'... How odd that I am desperately in need of money and hate the thought of sitting down to earn it! How much pleasanter would it be to stand here and wait for an adventure—for the fairy godmother who troubled the conventional Mrs. Barker! After all, it is not impossible.... A horse might take fright and bolt ... the driver lose his head ... a beauteous damsel sits wringing her hands in the carriage. I seize the opportunity, spring forward and check the maddened steed, escort the fainting lady home in a cab, and then—ah! Boundless Possibilities."

"My best chance," he thought, watching the stream of traffic that always fascinated him, "would be to write a terrible article, something relevant, catchy, and clever, and try to sell it for cash on the spot. I don't think it would be worthwhile to study job ads and apply for a position as a clerk or secretary. I hate the idea of being a clerk... There is envelope-addressing, I think, but my handwriting is awful... nor do I want to reach out to my friends and reveal my unfortunate situation..." (Since his father's death, Lionel had naturally given up his old lifestyle and dropped out of his usual milieu.) ... "No; I think the terrible article is clearly the way to go. What should I write about? 'How It Feels to Be Out on the Streets?'... 'The Psychology of Landladies.'... 'At a Loose End—A Curbstone Study.'... How strange that I desperately need money and hate the idea of sitting down to earn it! How much nicer it would be to stand here and wait for an adventure—for the fairy godmother that troubled the conventional Mrs. Barker! After all, it's not impossible... A horse might get startled and bolt... the driver could lose control... a beautiful lady might be sitting there wringing her hands in the carriage. I jump at the chance, rush forward and calm the wild horse, escort the fainting lady home in a cab, and then—ah! Endless possibilities."

He smiled, lighted a cigarette and pursued his idle fancy.

He smiled, lit a cigarette, and followed his daydream.

"She must be, of course, the sole heiress of a millionaire. In his gratitude he would wish to reward me. But seeing that I am no vulgar fee-snatcher he would ask me to stay and dine. Over the walnuts and the port (how long is it since I drank good port?) he would learn my story, and with unusual delicacy say, 'Well, some day I hope I shall be able to help you to a job.' I leave his house, warm, full-fed, hopeful. The next morning he sends his car round, and I am whirled to his palatial city office. I enter—the great man is up to his knees in documents dictating to a staff of typewriters and gramophones. He spares me three minutes. 'Good morning, Mr. Mortimer. I find I need a secretary—salary a thousand a year. Oh! a bagatelle, I know, but you would have opportunities. Politics, perhaps. Anyhow, a beginning. Care to connect?' I accept with diffidence. 'Good. Take your coat off. Next room you'll find ...' I am a made man. Then the daughter—I had forgotten her, dear thing!—already touched by my heroism, might look favorably upon me; and who knows——?"

"She has to be the only heiress of a millionaire. Out of gratitude, he would want to reward me. But since I'm not some greedy opportunist, he’d invite me to stay for dinner. While having walnuts and port (when was the last time I had good port?), he’d hear my story and with surprising kindness say, 'Well, I hope someday I can help you find a job.' I leave his house feeling warm, well-fed, and hopeful. The next morning, he sends his car for me, and I’m whisked away to his luxurious city office. I walk in—the big shot is buried in paperwork, dictating to a team of typists and recorders. He gives me three minutes. 'Good morning, Mr. Mortimer. I need a secretary—salary of a thousand a year. I know it’s small, but you’ll have opportunities. Maybe in politics. Anyway, it’s a start. Interested?' I accept a bit hesitantly. 'Good. Take your coat off. In the next room, you’ll find …' I’m set for life. Then there’s the daughter—I had almost forgotten her, sweet girl!—who might be impressed by my bravery, and who knows——?"

At this point his musings were broken by confused shoutings and whistles. Looking up, Lionel saw with amused surprise that for once fate was playing into his hands; his dreams were coming true. An open brougham, drawn by a terrified horse, was approaching at an appalling speed. The coachman, crazed with fear, was standing up, tugging vainly at the reins, white, and shouting. In the brougham, pallid but calm, sat a girl of about twenty-three. Her lips were slightly parted, but no sound came from between them; courage held her erect, motionless and silent. The traffic divided before the swaying brougham like waves before a cutwater. When it was fifty yards distant the coachman lost all control of himself and with a scream of fear leaped from the box. He came down On his feet, staggered against a portly merchant—who went over like a ninepin—and lurched heavily on to a policeman preparing to make a dash for the horse's head. The constable fell with the man, and the pair, hero and craven, rolled comfortably in the kennel, clasped in each other's arms.

At that moment, his thoughts were interrupted by loud shouts and whistles. Looking up, Lionel was surprised and amused to see that fate was finally on his side; his dreams were coming true. An open brougham, being pulled by a panicked horse, was speeding toward him. The coachman, overwhelmed with fear, was standing up, frantically tugging at the reins, his face pale, and shouting. Inside the brougham sat a girl around twenty-three, looking pale but composed. Her lips were slightly open, but no sound came out; her bravery kept her upright, still, and silent. The traffic parted for the swaying brougham like waves parting for a prow. When it was about fifty yards away, the coachman completely lost it and, with a scream of terror, jumped down from the box. He landed on his feet, bumped into a hefty merchant—who toppled over like a bowling pin—and crashed into a policeman who was trying to grab the horse's head. The officer fell along with the merchant, and the two, one brave and one cowardly, ended up rolling contentedly in the gutter, embraced in each other's arms.

Lionel, thus favored by destiny, fitted his hat more firmly to his head and prepared to make his fortune. In his early youth he had read that the best method of stopping a runaway is to run in the same direction. Remembering this, he set off at full speed; and by the time the horse was level with his shoulder he was running almost as fast. With a judicious leap he sprang at the reins, clutched them, stumbled, recovered and still ran. He was strong of arm and at least twelve stones in weight. The horse, already half-repentant of his lapse, was not inclined to support so heavy a burden at his mouth. A few yards more and the heroic part of the episode was over. Several officious touts were holding the horse's head, and another policeman was preparing to make notes.

Lionel, favored by fate, adjusted his hat securely on his head and got ready to make his fortune. In his youth, he had read that the best way to stop a runaway is to run in the same direction. Remembering this, he took off at full speed; by the time the horse was level with his shoulder, he was almost sprinting. With a well-timed leap, he lunged for the reins, grabbed them, stumbled, regained his balance, and kept running. He was strong and weighed at least 168 pounds. The horse, already somewhat regretful of its folly, wasn’t keen on carrying such a heavy load. A few more yards and the heroic part of the scene was done. Several eager bystanders were holding the horse’s head, while another police officer was getting ready to take notes.

Lionel, panting from the unusual exertion, turned to look after the lady. She, who had behaved with such admirable composure while danger was imminent, now that it was over, lay in a faint. As he raised her in his arms he noticed with satisfaction that she was certainly beautiful and her clothes expensive and tasteful. "Ha! ha!" he thought whimsically, "a secretaryship! Governor of a Crown Colony at least! I must take a flat to-morrow!" He bore her into a chemist's shop that stood conveniently near, and placed her in a chair. While the chemist was applying sal volatile in the genteelest manner, Lionel was wondering whom he should ask to support him at St. George's.

Lionel, out of breath from the unexpected effort, turned to check on the lady. She, who had remained so composed while danger was near, was now fainting now that it had passed. As he lifted her into his arms, he couldn't help but notice with pleasure how beautiful she was and how her clothes were expensive and stylish. "Ha! ha!" he thought playfully, "a secretary position! At least the governor of a Crown Colony! I need to get a place tomorrow!" He carried her into a nearby pharmacy and settled her into a chair. While the pharmacist was gently applying some smelling salts, Lionel wondered who he should ask to stand by him at St. George's.

It was not long before the lady recovered her senses, and she opened her eyes with a ravishing sigh. She was naturally bewildered, and Lionel—partly because he wished to reassure her, partly because she was very pretty—knelt and took her hand.

It wasn't long before the lady came to her senses and opened her eyes with a delightful sigh. She was understandably confused, and Lionel—partly wanting to reassure her and partly because she was very attractive—knelt down and took her hand.

"There is no need for alarm," he said persuasively, with the purring note that some women find sympathetic. "You fainted; that is all."

"There’s no need to worry," he said calmly, with a soothing tone that some women find comforting. "You just fainted; that’s all."

She gave the ghost of a shudder: "I fainted?"

She shuddered slightly: "I passed out?"

"Yes. The horse, ran away, but there was no accident."

"Yes. The horse ran away, but there was no accident."

"The coachman—is he hurt?"

"Is the coachman hurt?"

This thought for another in the midst of her own recovery flushed Lionel's being like a draught of wine. Hitherto she had been merely a pretty aristocrat and (apparently) a delightful girl. Now she was more—a divine human whom he longed to kiss, caress and call "You darling!"

This thought of caring for someone else while dealing with her own recovery filled Lionel with a rush of emotion, almost like a sip of wine. Until now, she had just seemed like a pretty aristocrat and (seemingly) a fun girl. Now, she was something more—a beautiful person he wanted to kiss, hold close, and say "You darling!"

"No," he said. "He fell softly. Upon a constable, I believe."

"No," he said. "He fell softly. I think it was on a police officer."

She was nearly herself again, and gave a little laugh. "Let us hope he was a fat one," she said. And then, after a pause: "Who stopped the horse?"

She was almost back to her old self and let out a small laugh. "Let's hope he was a big one," she said. Then, after a moment: "Who stopped the horse?"

"Oh, I was lucky enough to do that," he replied with an assumed jauntiness, wishing he could feel it was an every-day business. "It was not hard."

"Oh, I was lucky enough to do that," he said with a forced lightness, wishing he could see it as just another routine thing. "It wasn't difficult."

"Others appeared to think differently," she replied with a grave admiration that pleased him.

"Others seemed to think differently," she said with a serious admiration that made him happy.

"Then, madam, they can not have seen you," he smiled. Really, the affair was being conducted on correct lines.

"Then, ma'am, they must not have seen you," he smiled. Honestly, everything was going according to plan.

She mused for a moment, chin in hand.

She thought for a moment, resting her chin on her hand.

"... I think," she said presently, "you must be rather an unusual man." Lionel tried to look as if he disagreed. "Yes, I think so.... And I suppose I owe you my life.... I wonder what reward...."

"... I think," she said after a moment, "you must be quite an unusual guy." Lionel tried to seem like he disagreed. "Yeah, I think so.... And I guess I owe you my life.... I wonder what reward...."

It must have been the devil that prompted Lionel to say, "One pound, three and sevenpence"; but by an effort he choked back the horrible words, and stammered that he was already repaid.

It must have been the devil that prompted Lionel to say, "One pound, three shillings, and seven pence"; but with some effort, he held back the awful words and stammered that he had already been paid back.

"No," she demurred, smiling, searching him with her eyes: "that is hardly fair. I wonder if you would like ..." She glanced round. The chemist's back was turned: he was groping for some drug upon the shelves. Lionel was still upon one knee, his face upturned, his eyes drawn as by a magnet. She leaned toward him; her face came closer and closer yet, in her eyes a world of gratitude and fun. Her hair almost brushed his cheek, and he shivered. "I wonder if——" At that moment the chemist turned, and she finished the sentence persuasively, "—if you could get me a cab? I dare not trust my horse again to-day."

"No," she said with a smile, looking deeply into his eyes. "That’s not really fair. I wonder if you’d like..." She glanced around. The chemist had his back to them, searching for a medicine on the shelves. Lionel was still on one knee, his face tilted up and his eyes drawn to her like a magnet. She leaned in closer, her face getting nearer and nearer, full of gratitude and mischief. Her hair almost brushed against his cheek, causing him to shiver. "I wonder if—" At that moment, the chemist turned, and she finished her sentence sweetly, "—if you could get me a cab? I really can't trust my horse again today."

Lionel rose stiffly.

Lionel stood up stiffly.

"Do you prefer," he asked, fixing the unhappy and bewildered chemist with a glare of anger, "a hansom or a taxi?"

"Do you prefer," he asked, looking at the unhappy and confused chemist with an angry glare, "a cab or a taxi?"

"A taxi, please."

"Request a taxi, please."

Lionel withdrew. He ordered the coachman, dusty and degraded, to drive home. The policeman, who had salved the discomfiture of his over-throw by hectoring the crowd and cuffing the nearest urchins, obligingly blew his whistle. A minute later a taxi came up.

Lionel stepped back. He told the coachman, who looked worn and disheveled, to take him home. The police officer, who had eased his embarrassment from the fall by shouting at the crowd and scolding the nearest kids, kindly blew his whistle. A minute later, a taxi pulled up.


CHAPTER II

BEHIND THE SCENES

It was one of the great moments in Lionel's life when he handed her into the prosaic vehicle. From the chemist's shop to the cab was only a few feet, but for that paltry space the young man felt as a king must feel when he makes a royal progress abroad. There was no cheering from the crowd that had gathered, hoping for blood, or at least bandages; but the whispers ("That's him! That's him! Torfs! He's all right!" etc.) thrilled him with a sense of self-importance to which he had long been a stranger. He found it a little difficult to refrain from raising his hat and bowing his thanks to the kindly creatures. As for the lady, she walked on air and seemed unconscious of an audience.

It was one of the best moments in Lionel's life when he helped her into the ordinary vehicle. The distance from the chemist's shop to the cab was only a few feet, but for that small space, the young man felt like a king during a royal procession. There was no cheering from the crowd that had gathered, hoping for drama or at least some bandages; but the whispers ("That's him! That's him! Torfs! He's cool!" etc.) filled him with a sense of self-importance that he hadn’t felt in a long time. He found it a bit hard not to tip his hat and bow in gratitude to the friendly bystanders. As for the lady, she was on cloud nine and seemed completely unaware of an audience.

The cab was reached all too soon. Lionel waved aside a cloud of would-be helpers, and with a sigh of misery opened the door. The lady got in; but just as he was on the point of shutting himself off from every hope, she leaned forward.

The cab arrived way too quickly. Lionel brushed off a crowd of eager helpers and, with a sigh of despair, opened the door. The lady got in; but just as he was about to close himself off from all hope, she leaned forward.

"There is room for two!" she breathed.

"There’s space for two!" she said.

It was a fine thing for him that his hand was upon the door, for the invitation shook him as the wind the rushes. The crowd, the pavement, even the gross material substance of the constable, reeled before him. He heard but dimly the voice of the chauffeur asking whither he was to drive. "To Heaven!" he muttered, and then recklessly, "Or hell, if you like!" The chauffeur looked anxiously at him, fearing he had suffered mentally from his exertions. Lionel caught the suspicion in his eye and steadied himself. "I beg your pardon," he said brokenly; "I was repeating some poetry of my childhood—Paradise Lost—Milton, you know. Can't imagine what put it in my head. Drive round and round the park."

It was a good thing for him that his hand was on the door because the invitation shook him like the wind shakes tall grass. The crowd, the pavement, even the hefty form of the police officer, seemed to sway before him. He could barely hear the chauffeur's voice asking where he should take him. "To Heaven!" he muttered, then, in a reckless moment, added, "Or hell, if you want!" The chauffeur glanced at him with concern, worried he might have mentally collapsed from his efforts. Lionel noticed the suspicion in his eyes and steeled himself. "I’m sorry," he said haltingly; "I was just reciting some poetry from my childhood—Paradise Lost—Milton, you know. I can't imagine why that popped into my head. Drive around the park for a while."

"Which park?" asked the man gruffly.

"Which park?" the man asked gruffly.

"The farthest and biggest," said Lionel, and clambered in.

"The farthest and biggest," said Lionel, and climbed in.

They drove for several minutes without a word being spoken. Lionel was so amazed by the aptness and desirability of the adventure that he could not utter a word. He could only think, "What a perfectly topping girl! How will it end? What shall I do—say—think? She is the most charming creature I have met; she invites a kiss—might I?... Be careful, Lionel! Your fortune is at stake! The secretaryship! Mrs. Barker and her rent! A false step would ruin all! Besides, she is such a dear ..." These and a hundred other fancies flickered through his brain.

They drove for several minutes without saying a word. Lionel was so taken aback by how perfect and exciting the adventure was that he couldn't speak. He could only think, "What a totally amazing girl! How will it end? What should I do—say—think? She's the most charming person I've ever met; she seems to invite a kiss—should I?... Be careful, Lionel! Your future depends on this! The secretary job! Mrs. Barker and her rent! One wrong move could ruin everything! Plus, she's such a sweetheart..." These thoughts and a hundred others raced through his mind.

The strange lady was silent, too. It may have been that she felt she had been a little imprudent in her invitation to the cavalier, hero though he was. Leaning back against the cushion, she gazed pensively out of the window at the streets and traffic, lost in thought. Her companion stared fixedly at the stolid back of the chauffeur: that, at least, was real and a corrective.

The strange lady was quiet, too. She might have realized that she had been a bit reckless in inviting the charming hero. Leaning back against the cushion, she stared thoughtfully out the window at the streets and traffic, lost in her own thoughts. Her companion focused intently on the solid back of the chauffeur: that, at least, felt real and grounding.

It was the lady who spoke first, and with a sympathetic engaging accent, nicely calculated to stir the most sluggish blood.

It was the woman who spoke first, and with a warm, inviting tone, perfectly designed to wake even the most indifferent person.

"Well?" she said.

"Well?" she said.

Lionel awoke from his trance and turned. "Ah!" he murmured, and seized her hand. He raised it to his lips and kissed it with a passionate reverence. "Ah!" he said again, and "Ah!" punctuating the exclamations with tender salutes.

Lionel snapped out of his trance and turned. "Oh!" he whispered, taking her hand. He brought it to his lips and kissed it with heartfelt admiration. "Oh!" he said again, punctuating his words with gentle kisses.

"You should not do that," reproved the lady, though her voice betrayed neither astonishment nor indignation. "It is foolish." She laughed musically.

"You shouldn't do that," the lady said, but her voice showed neither surprise nor anger. "It's silly." She laughed sweetly.

"Foolish!" echoed Lionel with a fine contempt. "Madam, it is anything but that. If this be foolishness, then youth and joy and a careless heart are folly, and woman is folly——"

"Foolish!" Lionel said with clear disdain. "Madam, it is anything but that. If this is foolishness, then youth, joy, and a carefree heart are folly, and woman is folly——"

"I thought that men were agreed upon that," she said.

"I thought that men were in agreement about that," she said.

"Cynics and pedagogues may hold the heresy," admitted Lionel, "but not the happy, the young and the wise."

"Cynics and teachers might believe that, " Lionel admitted, "but not the happy, the young, and the wise."

"Your youth and happiness are patent," she retorted, "but how am I to be sure of your wisdom?"

"Your youth and happiness are obvious," she shot back, "but how can I be sure of your wisdom?"

He laughed.

He chuckled.

"If you accept my youth and gaiety, I have good hopes of convincing you of that."

"If you embrace my youthful spirit and enthusiasm, I'm confident I can persuade you of that."

She withdrew her hand from his ardent clasp, as if he had been too presumptuous, or at least premature. Lionel cursed himself for a coxcomb and hastened to make his peace.

She pulled her hand away from his eager grip, as though he had been too forward, or at least too soon. Lionel cursed himself for being such a fool and quickly tried to make amends.

"You are not angry?" he asked anxiously. "I have not offended you——?"

"You aren't angry, are you?" he asked nervously. "I haven't upset you, have I?"

"No," she said, after an infinitesimal pause. "I am ... not ... angry."

"No," she said, after a brief pause. "I am ... not ... angry."

There was a query in her tone that restored his self-confidence, a quality of which he had usually good store. With a resolute movement he took her in his arms. Possibly she was too amazed to protest; certainly at first she made not the least resistence to the onset. It was not until his lips touched hers that she gave a little cry as of shame. "No, no!" she pleaded. "You must not ... my husband ..."

There was a question in her voice that boosted his confidence, which he usually had plenty of. With a determined motion, he wrapped his arms around her. She might have been too shocked to object; at least at first, she didn’t resist at all. It wasn’t until his lips brushed against hers that she let out a small cry of embarrassment. "No, no!" she insisted. "You must not ... my husband ..."

Lionel was a man of the world, but as chance would have it, he was a man of honor, too. He dropped the lady like a hot coal at the appalling word, and sat back rigid in his own corner of the cab. His companion, mastered by emotion, covered her face with her hands. Presently she peeped between her fingers and repeated his words, almost his accent.

Lionel was a worldly man, but by chance, he was also a man of honor. He dropped the lady like a hot potato at the shocking word, and sat back stiffly in his corner of the cab. His companion, overwhelmed with emotion, covered her face with her hands. After a moment, she peeked between her fingers and repeated his words, almost mimicking his accent.

"You are ... not ... angry?"

"You're not... angry?"

"I am never angry with a woman," he replied; but the lie was obvious. She laid a soft hand upon his arm.

"I’m never angry with a woman," he replied; but it was clear he was lying. She placed a gentle hand on his arm.

"You have not told me your name yet," she murmured. "I must always cherish in my memory a brave man who is not too brave to be a gentleman."

"You still haven't told me your name," she said softly. "I will always treasure in my memory a brave man who isn’t too proud to be a gentleman."

He moved uneasily, reflecting that noblesse sometimes finds it difficult to oblige.

He shifted uncomfortably, thinking that noblesse can sometimes struggle to oblige.

"I am called Lionel Mortimer."

"I'm Lionel Mortimer."

"I am called Beatrice Blair. Lionel ..." she went on with a reflective sweetness, and he started as if stung. Her hand restrained while it aroused him. "No: you must not mind that. I call you Lionel because"—she turned aside as if struggling with her feelings—"I am a mother. My little boy is called—was called Lionel."

"I’m Beatrice Blair. Lionel..." she continued with a thoughtful sweetness, and he flinched as if shocked. Her hand both held him back and stirred him up. "No, you shouldn’t take that the wrong way. I call you Lionel because"—she turned away as if battling her emotions—"I’m a mother. My little boy was named—was named Lionel."

"I am sorry," he said sincerely. "Go on."

"I'm sorry," he said genuinely. "Go ahead."

"You must think hardly of me." He shook his head. "Yes, you must—it is only natural. But I should like you to know the reason why I asked you to——"

"You must think badly of me." He shook his head. "Yeah, you must—it’s only natural. But I want you to know the reason why I asked you to——"

By this time Lionel was in a very good humor with himself. Warned by his recent heroism and virtue, flattered by the interest shown in him by this delightful creature, he was prepared for anything.

By this point, Lionel was feeling really good about himself. Boosted by his recent bravery and goodness, and flattered by the attention he was getting from this charming person, he was ready for anything.

"I never ask a woman for a reason," he said, smiling. "I have the most complete faith."

"I never ask a woman why," he said, smiling. "I have total faith."

"How old are you?" she asked; and when he answered "Twenty-seven," she laughed.

"How old are you?" she asked. When he replied, "Twenty-seven," she laughed.

They drove in silence for a space; presently she asked what time it was. He put his hand to his pocket and then withdrew it. She had observed the action—"Your pocket has been picked?"

They drove in silence for a while; then she asked what time it was. He reached into his pocket and then pulled his hand back out. She had noticed the move—"Did someone steal from your pocket?"

"No," he said frankly. "As a matter of fact, I pawned my watch a week ago."

"No," he said honestly. "Actually, I pawned my watch a week ago."

"Then you are poor!" she cried impulsively. "Oh! I beg your pardon,—I did not mean——"

"Then you’re broke!" she said impulsively. "Oh! I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean——"

Lionel was never disconcerted by his lack of means, and the chuckle was perfectly honest as he replied, "Distinctly poor. I am glad to think I can still create an illusion of wealth in an artificial light, but really I am worth very little."

Lionel was never bothered by his lack of money, and he honestly chuckled as he replied, "Definitely poor. I'm happy to think I can still create the illusion of wealth under the right lighting, but honestly, I'm worth very little."

"You do not mind?" she said, her eyes dancing.

"You don't mind?" she asked, her eyes sparkling.

"I admit," he said, "that I should prefer to be well off. But, being poor, I see no use in making myself unhappy. I should prefer to pay half a guinea for a stall rather than a shilling for the gallery. Still, I contrive pretty tolerably to enjoy the play."

"I admit," he said, "that I would rather be well-off. But since I'm poor, I don't see the point in making myself miserable. I’d prefer to pay half a guinea for a decent seat rather than a shilling for the gallery. Still, I manage quite well to enjoy the play."

"You are a philosopher," she approved.

"You’re a philosopher," she said with approval.

"A poor man can't afford to be anything else."

"A poor man can't afford to be anything different."

After a pause she said, "It must be getting late. Will you please tell the man to drive to the Macready Theater?—the stage-door."

After a moment, she said, "It must be getting late. Can you please tell the driver to take us to the Macready Theater?—the stage door."

He opened the window, smiling to himself. "An actress!" he thought; "the young man's dream of an adventure! This is absurdly conventional." After directing the chauffeur, he sat back, wondering what the end would be, content to wait on fortune. The lady, too, did not speak again until they had almost reached their destination. Then she took a purse from her satchel and said with friendly good-humor, "This is my frolic, and I wish to pay for it. Please!"

He opened the window, smiling to himself. "An actress!" he thought; "the young man's dream of an adventure! This is so typical." After telling the driver where to go, he settled back, curious about how it would all turn out, happy to leave it up to fate. The lady also didn’t say anything again until they were almost at their destination. Then she pulled out a purse from her bag and said cheerfully, "This is my treat, and I want to pay for it. Please!"

Lionel was too well-bred to interpose bourgeois objections. Besides, it was a case of necessity: his sixpence-ha'penny had been burning a hole in his pocket for the last ten minutes.

Lionel was too well-mannered to interrupt with petty concerns. Besides, it was a matter of necessity: his sixpence-ha'penny had been itching in his pocket for the last ten minutes.

"Fair lady," he said lightly, "I would if I could, but I can not. Five shillings will be more than enough."

"Fair lady," he said casually, "I would if I could, but I can't. Five shillings will be more than enough."

She gave him half a sovereign, and he wished he had been a street arab to whom she could have said, "And keep the change." This, however, was clearly impossible, nor did it appear to enter the lady's head. After he had paid the man she received the balance with a careless gravity. He raised his hat.

She gave him half a sovereign, and he wished he could have been a street kid to whom she could have said, "And keep the change." This, however, was clearly impossible, and it didn’t seem to cross the lady's mind. After he paid the man, she took the remaining money with a nonchalant seriousness. He tipped his hat.

"You are not going?" she asked in surprise.

"You’re not going?" she asked, surprised.

"Unless I can be of further service."

"Unless I can help you with anything else."

"But that is why I have brought you here! You have not heard my reason yet, and you must—at least in justice to myself. This is only the beginning: you can be of the greatest service if you will. Come!"

"But that’s why I brought you here! You haven’t heard my reason yet, and you need to—at least to be fair to me. This is just the start: you can be incredibly helpful if you want to. Come!"

Lionel followed her through the stage-door. Adventure beckoned, and he was not the man to disobey the seductive finger. True, the lady had a husband—a scurvy thought—but he had proved himself as strong as she. And she was deucedly pretty.

Lionel followed her through the stage door. Adventure called, and he wasn’t the kind of guy to resist its tempting allure. Sure, the lady was married—a dirty thought—but her husband had shown himself to be just as strong as she was. And she was incredibly pretty.

They passed the janitor, who touched his hat to the lady, and went along a passage. Then up a flight of stairs and down another corridor, where sundry couples were lounging and chatting between their entrances. It was evidently a costume play, and the sight of doublets, rapiers and helmets was a pleasant thing after the drabness of the threshold. Illusion again threw her veil over the crudities of life; romance sounded the horn of hope and hallooed Lionel to the pursuit.

They walked past the janitor, who tipped his hat to the lady, and continued down a hallway. Then they went up a flight of stairs and down another corridor, where a few couples were hanging out and talking near their doors. It was clearly a costume play, and seeing the outfits, swords, and helmets was refreshing after the dullness at the entrance. Illusion once again covered the harsh realities of life; romance called out to Lionel to join the chase.

The lady stopped suddenly before a door. This she opened and entered the room beyond. Lionel followed, closed the door, and looked about him. He was no stranger to the regions "behind," for in his younger days he had been the friend of many actors and actresses not a few. With the dressing-rooms of the men he was well acquainted,—those dingy color-washed chambers, lighted by flaring gas, divided by racks for dresses, equipped at times with but the washing-basin, stifling of atmosphere, with little room to turn about in. In his younger days, as has been observed, he had savored the delights of these unromantic barracks, and had thoroughly enjoyed the experience; now he was blasé.

The lady suddenly stopped in front of a door. She opened it and walked into the room. Lionel followed her, closed the door, and looked around. He was no stranger to the "behind-the-scenes" areas, as he had been friends with many actors and actresses in his younger days. He was quite familiar with the men's dressing rooms—those shabby, color-washed spaces lit by harsh gas lights, divided by racks for costumes, sometimes equipped only with a washbasin, and filled with a stuffy atmosphere that left little room to move around. As noted, he had enjoyed the simple pleasures of these unromantic spaces when he was younger, but now he felt jaded.

Of the women's dressing-rooms he was ignorant, but in truth he was far from curious. He supposed they were something of a replica of what he had seen already,—four or five creatures herded in a bare loose-box, in the intervals of painting and dressing, engaged with talk of frills or scandal. The private dressing-rooms of those great creatures, the leading men and ladies, were still a sealed book. He had never known (oh, horrid thought!) a "lead," and he surveyed the present room with interest.

Of the women's dressing rooms, he knew nothing, but honestly, he wasn't really curious. He figured they were probably similar to what he had already seen—four or five women gathered in a plain room, chatting about clothes or gossip between getting ready. The private dressing rooms of the big stars, the leading men and women, were still a mystery to him. He had never experienced (oh, what a terrible thought!) a "lead," and he looked at the current room with interest.

There was little to reward him, for it was a very ordinary room, quietly furnished with two or three easy chairs, a dressing-table covered with "making-up" apparatus, a number of photographs scattered about in various coigns of vantage, a wall-paper of a warm terra-cotta tint, a soft carpet to correspond. A brass curtain-rod divided the room in two, but the curtain was not drawn. "Will you sit down?" said the hostess; "I must leave you for a moment. Try that chair in the corner,—it is the best. And do smoke—the cigarettes are close to you on that little table."

There wasn’t much to appreciate, as it was just a plain room, furnished with a couple of easy chairs, a dressing table filled with makeup products, several photographs scattered around in various spots, warm terra-cotta wallpaper, and a soft carpet to match. A brass curtain rod separated the room in half, but the curtain was open. “Please, have a seat,” said the hostess. “I need to step away for a moment. Try that chair in the corner—it’s the most comfortable. And feel free to smoke—the cigarettes are right there on that little table.”

With a swift movement she pulled the curtain along its rod and disappeared behind it. There followed a slight clicking as if she was switching on more light; then a soft rustling and the sound of her voice humming an air from Carmen. Lionel obediently lighted a cigarette and patiently awaited events.

With a quick motion, she slid the curtain along its rod and vanished behind it. Then there was a faint clicking sound, as if she was turning on more lights; after that, a gentle rustling and her voice began humming a tune from Carmen. Lionel dutifully lit a cigarette and patiently waited for what would happen next.

In less than ten minutes she drew the curtain and stood before him again. But now she was a different creature. Her Bond Street costume had disappeared, the twentieth-century had gone. The piquant head was covered only with the dark masses of hair that gleamed seductively. She was clad in a sort of peignoir, a loose flowing robe of Oriental texture, crimson of hue, with dull gold braiding and tassels. Her face was rouged and powdered, but in the brilliant electric glare it seemed neither out of keeping nor meretricious. As she stood, holding the drawn curtain with one hand, she looked as if she had stepped straight out of the pages of the Arabian Nights.

In less than ten minutes, she drew the curtain and stood before him again. But now she was a different person. Her Bond Street outfit had vanished, and the twentieth century was gone. Her striking head was only covered by dark, shiny hair that glimmered attractively. She wore a kind of peignoir, a loose, flowing robe made of Oriental fabric, deep red in color, with dull gold trim and tassels. Her face was made up with rouge and powder, but under the bright electric light, it looked neither out of place nor cheap. As she stood there, holding the drawn curtain with one hand, she resembled someone who had stepped right out of the pages of the Arabian Nights.

"Do you like it?" she asked carelessly, sure of the effect. Poor Lionel, on most occasions ready of tongue, who took a pride in never showing surprise, could only murmur "Admirable!" With this, however, she seemed content, and sat down in a convenient chair.

"Do you like it?" she asked casually, confident of the impact. Poor Lionel, usually quick with his words and proud of never showing surprise, could only mumble, "Admirable!" With this, though, she seemed satisfied and took a seat in a nearby chair.

"Luckily, it is a straight make-up," she said, taking a cigarette and lighting it. "As a rule I use grease-paint, but to-night I was in a hurry and made-up dry. I want to talk. I am not on for a while, and my dress can be slipped on in five minutes. I mean to tell you as briefly as I can my history. It is your due."

"Fortunately, it's a simple makeup," she said, grabbing a cigarette and lighting it. "Usually, I use grease paint, but tonight I was in a rush and went with dry makeup. I want to talk. I’m not up for a while, and I can throw on my dress in five minutes. I want to share my story with you as briefly as possible. You deserve to know."

Lionel made a noble gesture of dissent. "I am sure," he said chivalrously, "it is all it should have been—"

Lionel made a brave show of disagreement. "I know," he said gallantly, "it is exactly what it should have been—"

She interrupted with some acerbity. "That is not my reason. I have nothing either to excuse or condone. But as I have already put you to considerable trouble, and mean (if you are willing to help, me) to put you to still more, it is but fair that you should know all."

She interjected briskly, "That's not my reason. I have nothing to excuse or justify. But since I've already caused you quite a bit of trouble, and intend (if you’re willing to help me) to cause you even more, I think it's only fair that you know everything."

Lionel bowed as gracefully as he could.

Lionel bowed as gracefully as he could.

"I will make it as short as I can," she continued. "There is much that is strange and improbable in it, but I beg you to keep silent and forbear to question me until the end. I was born in a little village on the southeast coast. I was a twin, the other child being a sister, the replica of myself. My mother died when I was only two years old. When I was seventeen I was kidnaped by a tribe of Rumanian gipsies who wished to be revenged on my father. He had prosecuted some of them for poaching on his land. I was smuggled to the coast, and then across to the continent.

"I'll keep this as brief as possible," she went on. "There’s a lot that’s weird and unlikely in my story, but I ask you to stay quiet and hold off on questioning me until I'm done. I was born in a small village on the southeast coast. I have a twin sister who looks just like me. My mother passed away when I was only two. At seventeen, I was kidnapped by a group of Romanian gypsies who wanted to get back at my father. He had prosecuted some of them for poaching on his land. I was smuggled to the coastline and then taken across to the continent."

"I do not mean to waste time in lingering over details immaterial to my purpose. Were I writing a book I could fill a volume with the strange incidents of my abduction and wanderings. But as time is short I will come to the point at once. We journeyed by slow stages across the continent, and of course I was jealously guarded the whole time. My English dress was burned, my skin stained a brownish hue. Whenever observation threatened I was immured in a small black hole, made at the end of one of the caravans by a false partition. The police failed to trace me, for the gipsies had been cunning enough to stay some weeks in England after my capture to throw my relatives off the scent, keeping a strict watch upon me. So with this inadequate résumé you must realize that we have passed through Germany, Austria, Rumania, Bulgaria and Rumelia. We crossed the Turkish frontier, and I still had no plan of escape. Oh, yes! I had tried—once! The threats they used on my detection were more than enough to prevent me trying a second time.

"I don’t want to waste time going over details that don’t matter to my purpose. If I were writing a book, I could fill a volume with the strange incidents of my abduction and travels. But since time is short, I’ll get straight to the point. We traveled slowly across the continent, and of course, I was carefully guarded the entire time. My English clothes were burned, and my skin was stained a brownish color. Whenever there was a chance of being seen, I was locked away in a small dark space created at the end of one of the caravans by a false wall. The police couldn’t find me because the gypsies were clever enough to stay in England for a few weeks after my capture to throw my relatives off track while keeping a close eye on me. So, with this brief summary, you should understand that we passed through Germany, Austria, Romania, Bulgaria, and Rumelia. We crossed the Turkish border, and I still had no escape plan. Oh, yes! I had tried—once! The threats they made if I was caught were more than enough to stop me from trying a second time."

"At last we reached Constantinople, where we stayed a night in a huge caravansary. I was too well watched to be able to write a letter. The next evening I was sold to a Turkish officer of the sultan's body-guard. Blindfolded and gagged, I was put into a kind of sedan-chair under cover of darkness and carried to his palace. I was escorted to a fine suite of apartments, furnished in the eastern manner, but lit with electric light. By this time I was so inured to tribulation that I slept peacefully the whole night.

"Finally, we arrived in Constantinople, where we spent a night in a large inn. I was being watched too closely to write a letter. The next evening, I was sold to a Turkish officer in the sultan's bodyguard. Blindfolded and gagged, I was placed in a sort of sedan chair under the cover of darkness and taken to his palace. I was led to a beautiful suite of rooms, decorated in an eastern style but illuminated with electric lights. By that point, I was so used to hardship that I slept soundly the entire night."

"The next morning the lord of the household arrived. He salaamed profoundly and plunged at once into the business of the day. 'Fair lady,' he began—and I was surprised at his excellent English and supreme courtesy—'believe me when I say that I regret your sufferings. But as I am not the man to beat about the bush, I make bold to inform you, with all possible respect and determination, that you are destined to become my wife.'

"The next morning, the head of the household arrived. He bowed deeply and immediately got down to business. 'Fair lady,' he began—and I was surprised by his excellent English and utmost courtesy—'please believe me when I say that I regret your sufferings. But since I'm not one to beat around the bush, I must respectfully and confidently inform you that you are meant to become my wife.'"

"I was not unprepared for this, but replied firmly that I would never marry any one against my will. I added that I was a British subject, and that as soon as my plight was known I should be rescued and vengeance exacted.

"I wasn't completely unprepared for this, but I firmly replied that I would never marry anyone against my will. I added that I was a British citizen, and that as soon as my situation was known, I would be rescued and justice would be served."

"He laughed pleasantly. 'This is not England,' he said, 'and you will never be rescued. Let me put the matter plainly. I have bought you to satisfy a whim. I have long wished for an English wife, because I happen to admire English women more than any others. I have made efforts to contract an alliance by orthodox methods, but have not succeeded. Set your mind at rest, however; I intend no violence against your lovely person. If you refuse me, you will remain a prisoner in a gilded cage, but no harm shall come to you.'

"He laughed pleasantly. 'This isn't England,' he said, 'and you will never be rescued. Let me be clear. I've bought you to satisfy a desire. I've always wanted an English wife because I admire English women more than any others. I've tried to arrange an alliance through traditional means, but I've failed. Don't worry, though; I don't intend any harm to you. If you turn me down, you'll stay a prisoner in a gilded cage, but nothing bad will happen to you.'"

"'But why——' I began. He waved his hand.

"'But why——' I started to say. He waved his hand.

"'Because I could wish that you might learn to love me. At present I can not expect it; for the future, who knows? I am a bachelor by choice—you need have no western fears of polygamy. I am rich, young and powerful. And I hope that you will find out that, though of another civilization, I can fulfil your idea of a gentleman. For the present your jailer and lover bids you farewell.'

"'Because I hope you might learn to love me someday. Right now, I can’t expect that; who knows what the future holds? I’m a bachelor by choice—you don’t need to worry about any western notions of polygamy. I’m wealthy, young, and strong. And I hope you’ll see that, even though I’m from a different culture, I can meet your idea of a gentleman. For now, your jailer and lover says goodbye.'"

"He left me in a state of stupefaction. For some days after this I saw nothing of him. I was treated with the utmost respect, as if I were mistress of the household, but I was a prisoner. I was allowed to walk in the spacious high-walled garden; but devoted slaves were close at hand to prevent my communicating with the outer world.

"He left me completely stunned. For a few days after that, I didn’t see him at all. I was treated with the highest respect, as if I were the lady of the house, but I was a prisoner. I was allowed to walk in the large, high-walled garden, but devoted servants were always nearby to make sure I couldn’t communicate with the outside world."

"After a week had elapsed, Lukos—for that was my master's name—began to pay regular visits to my chamber. He exerted himself to the utmost to interest and charm, but as yet he never mentioned love. He would talk of a thousand things—books, philosophy, the drama, even of fashion—and being most versatile and accomplished, I found him excellent company. I did not feel much resentment, for I had begun to learn the world and understand his point of view, but I was inflexibly opposed to a marriage by force. I was resolved to die a captive, if necessary, rather than yield.

"After a week had passed, Lukos—my master’s name—started visiting my room regularly. He tried really hard to be interesting and charming, but he didn't mention love at all. He talked about a thousand topics—books, philosophy, theater, even fashion—and since he was so versatile and talented, I found him great company. I didn’t feel much resentment because I was starting to understand the world and see things from his perspective, but I was absolutely against an arranged marriage. I was determined to remain a captive, if necessary, rather than give in."

"This went on for two years. You start? It is true. No breath of my imprisonment reached the embassy—much less my home. For a captive, my life was easy, and during the long months my hopes had died, though my determination was as English and stubborn as ever. Lukos was equally persistent in maintaining his original attitude—gentle, persuasive, polite, though now he often urged his suit. I admit that in other circumstances I might have yielded, but pride kept me strong.

"This went on for two years. You start? It's true. No word of my imprisonment got to the embassy—let alone my home. For a prisoner, my life was relatively easy, and over those long months my hopes faded, but my determination remained as English and stubborn as ever. Lukos was just as persistent in keeping his original approach—gentle, persuasive, polite, though he often pushed his agenda more. I’ll admit that in different circumstances I might have given in, but pride kept me strong."

"But I must hurry on—"

"But I need to hurry—"

As she said these words there was a knock, and a dresser entered.

As she said this, there was a knock, and a dresser came in.

"Twenty minutes, Miss Blair," she said, without a glance at Lionel.

"Twenty minutes, Miss Blair," she said, not looking at Lionel.

"More than enough," said the strange lady, but she rose as she spoke. "You will stay to hear the end, Mr. Mortimer? I am on for most of this act, but if you find it interesting, please stay and smoke. You must excuse me."

"More than enough," said the strange lady, but she got up as she spoke. "You'll stay to hear the end, Mr. Mortimer? I’m in most of this act, but if you find it interesting, please stay and smoke. You have to excuse me."

"By all means," said Lionel, rising. "Shall I—?"

"Of course," said Lionel, standing up. "Should I—?"

He looked toward the door. "Oh, no!" she replied, and drew the curtain once more. Then she and the dresser disappeared behind it. A brief interval elapsed and she came forth dressed to play her part. She threw him a bright smile as he sprang to the door. "You must theorize till I come again," she said cheerfully, and he smiled back. The dresser followed her mistress, and he was left alone.

He looked towards the door. "Oh, no!" she replied, and pulled the curtain closed again. Then she and the dresser vanished behind it. After a short moment, she emerged ready to perform her role. She gave him a bright smile as he rushed to the door. "You have to think until I come back," she said cheerfully, and he smiled back. The dresser followed her, leaving him alone.


CHAPTER III

CONFIDENCES

"This," thought Lionel, as he waited for her return, "is a queer business, a very queer business indeed. Here we have the indispensable ingredients for an adventure—night, a pretty actress, and an impecunious young man who has played the Noble 'Ero. What happens? The lady sweeps the 'Ero off in a chariot, takes him to her dressing-room, behaves with surprising propriety (quite like an ordinary mortal, in fact), and proceeds to tell him a tale worthy of a writer of feuilletons. What does it mean? What is the idea, the general scheme? The tale must be lies,—pure, unvarnished buncombe, in the language of the vulgar. It is too much to swallow a kidnaping, a tour through, let me see ... Germany, Austria, Rumania, and, h'm ... h'm ... Bulgaria and Rumelia; a bashi-bazouk in Constantinople, a forced marriage—I suppose that's bound to come—and all the rest.... No, my delightful charmer, this really is a little bit too much ... your emotional faculties and the life of the footlights have led you astray...."

"This," thought Lionel, as he waited for her to come back, "is a strange situation, a really strange situation. Here we have all the essential elements for an adventure—night, a beautiful actress, and a broke young man who has played the Noble Hero. What happens? The lady whisks the Hero away in a carriage, takes him to her dressing room, behaves with surprising decorum (just like an everyday person, actually), and starts telling him a story worthy of a sensational novelist. What does it mean? What’s the point, the overall plan? The story must be lies—pure, blatant nonsense, to put it bluntly. It's too much to believe in a kidnapping, a journey through, let me see ... Germany, Austria, Romania, and, h'm ... h'm ... Bulgaria and Rumelia; a bashi-bazouk in Constantinople, a forced marriage—I guess that’s coming next—and everything else.... No, my charming distraction, this really is a bit over the top ... your emotions and the life of the stage have led you off course...."

But he shook his head, dissatisfied. The simple explanation that she was telling lies was too simple. It explained nothing. The remembrance of her delicious personality sent incredulity to the right-about. Her gracious presence, dignified, commanding, womanly; her brilliant eyes, shining with purity, sympathy and truth; her force of character that revealed itself in every tone and gesture; her pretty hands ... these and a hundred other witnesses battled in her favor. "Besides," he thought, striving to weigh all evidence impartially, "what possible object could she have in lying to me—to me of all people? She knows I am poor and useless for purposes of blackmail. She is too ethereal a creature for a vulgar intrigue—of that I am as sure as that I am neither mad nor dreaming. No; the bare hard facts go to prove that she is telling the truth. Again, why should she lie to the 'Ero who has saved her life? Surely the 'Ero may bring that forward with justice.—'Not guilty, my lord!'" he said aloud, acquitting the fair defendant with a convinced enthusiasm, for he was really glad to believe the new goddess a goddess indeed. Then for a moment doubt returned: "But this room—this girl—the whole adventure is so fantastic, the tale so unlikely, that I can hardly ... Lionel, enough! It may be true, and the evidence is in her favor. Be content to wait on events. At least, it is a variation from the normal—an agreeable break in the monotony of Mrs. Barker and the world. Let me seize the moment, enjoy my brief hour, and allow the future to take care of itself. At worst, I can be no loser at the game ... no ... unless I fall in love with her.... But that must not happen ... it must not happen.... Still, I could wish she had no husband!"

But he shook his head, feeling unsatisfied. The simple explanation that she was lying was just too straightforward. It explained nothing. The memory of her delightful personality made disbelief fade away. Her graceful presence, dignified and commanding, her beautiful eyes shining with purity, empathy, and truth; her strong character shining through in every tone and gesture; her lovely hands... these and a hundred other reminders fought on her behalf. "Besides," he thought, trying to consider all the evidence fairly, "what could her motive be for lying to me—of all people? She knows I’m poor and not useful for blackmail. She’s too ethereal a person for something so crass—I’m as sure of that as I am that I’m neither mad nor dreaming. No; the cold hard facts suggest that she’s telling the truth. And why would she lie to the 'Hero who saved her life? Surely the 'Hero can declare that fairly. 'Not guilty, my lord!'" he said out loud, fully convinced, because he was genuinely pleased to believe that the new goddess was indeed a goddess. Then for a moment doubt returned: "But this room—this girl—the whole situation is so bizarre, the story so unlikely, that I can hardly... Lionel, enough! It might be true, and the evidence is on her side. Be patient and wait for what happens next. At least, it’s a break from the routine—an enjoyable distraction from Mrs. Barker and the world. Let me seize the moment, enjoy this brief time, and let the future take care of itself. At worst, I can’t lose much in this situation... no... unless I fall in love with her... But that can’t happen... it must not happen... Still, I wish she didn’t have a husband!"

The wish being vain, if not immoral, he laughed wryly at himself and picked up a book that he found lying on the mantelpiece. It was a little volume of light verse, and it whiled away the time until his hostess reappeared. This was about half an hour after her exit. She entered, radiant with triumph.

The wish was pointless, if not wrong, so he laughed at himself and grabbed a book he found on the mantelpiece. It was a small collection of light poetry, and it kept him occupied until his hostess came back. This was about half an hour after she left. She came in, glowing with success.

"Has it seemed long?" she asked, pulling back the curtain and drawing out a chair.

"Has it felt like a long time?" she asked, pulling back the curtain and taking out a chair.

"An eternity," he answered smoothly enough, rising and closing the door. "And now the rest of your wonderful story, if you are not too tired."

"An eternity," he replied easily, getting up and shutting the door. "And now, if you're not too tired, I'd love to hear the rest of your fascinating story."

"Not at all," she said; "but it sounds odd to hear you call it 'wonderful.' To me, who lived it, it seemed inevitable and ordinary: even now it hardly seems wonderful. But this is waste of time. I must try to hurry the crisis.... Let me see, where did I stop?... Ah! I remember now....

"Not at all," she said. "But it sounds strange to hear you call it 'wonderful.' To me, who experienced it, it seemed unavoidable and normal: even now it barely seems wonderful. But this is a waste of time. I need to speed up the crisis... Let me think, where did I leave off?... Ah! I remember now..."

"Well, I lived two years a prisoner, and time dulled my pain. Escape was hopeless, and I tried to be as cheerful as I could. No news reached me of the outer world—I did not even know whether my father and sister were alive. That was hard, but I, too, learned hardness from experience.

"Well, I spent two years as a prisoner, and over time, my pain faded. Escaping felt impossible, so I did my best to stay cheerful. I didn't hear anything from the outside world—I didn't even know if my father and sister were still alive. That was tough, but I learned to toughen up through my experiences."

"One morning Lukos came to my room as usual, but not in his usual spirits. I rallied him on his dulness (oh! we were good friends, in spite of the anomalous position; that is really the least surprising feature of the story!), but he did not respond. When at last he walked toward the window and had stood, gloomily at gaze, for several minutes, I felt alarmed. He had never been in such a mood before. 'Lukos,' I said gently, 'what is the matter?'

"One morning, Lukos came to my room like he always did, but he wasn’t in his usual upbeat mood. I teased him about being so down (oh! we were good friends, despite the odd situation; that’s honestly the least surprising part of the story!), but he didn’t react. When he finally walked over to the window and stared out there gloomily for several minutes, I started to worry. He had never been like this before. 'Lukos,' I said softly, 'what’s wrong?'"

"In a moment he was at my feet, pouring forth a torrent of words. 'Heart of my heart!' he cried in tones that would have racked a devil; 'can you ask! You know that I love you, for my eyes and soul have spoken. I bought you as merchandise, with little care; I have learned to love you as a woman should be loved, with all the strength of my being, the force of my spirit, the frenzy of a madman that rejoices in his madness! For you I would do anything—I would tear the sultan from his throne—I would seize every mosque in the empire to found a new religion, the worship of yourself! I am your master, and yet the meanest of your slaves! You can stir me with a quiver of your eyelashes—'

"In an instant, he was at my feet, spilling out a flood of words. 'Heart of my heart!' he exclaimed in a way that could make even the devil shudder; 'can you ask! You know I love you, for my eyes and soul have already revealed it. I bought you like a piece of goods, without much thought; but I've come to love you as a woman deserves to be loved, with all my strength, the intensity of my spirit, the madness of someone who savors their insanity! I'd do anything for you—I would rip the sultan from his throne—I would take over every mosque in the empire to create a new religion, the worship of you! I am your master, yet the lowliest of your slaves! You can ignite my passion with just a flicker of your eyelashes—'

"'Yet you will not set me free,' I said, pitying, but justly reproachful.

"'Yet you won’t let me go,' I said, feeling pity but also justly reproachful."

"'No,' he groaned. 'I love you so much that I will not climb the heights of renunciation. I love you enough to respect your defenselessness, but I can not let you go to be, perhaps, another's. Oh, lady of my soul, can you not be merciful? Can you not unbend from your divinity and love me? Star of the West, can you not illumine an eastern desert, for I love you—I love you!'"

"'No,' he groaned. 'I love you so much that I won't rise to the heights of giving you up. I love you enough to respect your vulnerability, but I cannot let you go to be, perhaps, someone else's. Oh, lady of my heart, can you not show some mercy? Can you not come down from your pedestal and love me? Star of the West, can you not light up an eastern desert, for I love you—I love you!'"

"Mountebank!" said Lionel with a fine contempt. He disliked Lukos.

"Mountebank!" Lionel said with clear disdain. He didn't like Lukos.

"He had a poetic nature," pouted the lady. "Besides, we Occidentals, colder in spirit, less imaginative, must make allowances for exotic passion. I confess that his words moved me. But I took his hand and said, 'It is impossible, my friend.'"

"He had a poetic nature," the lady pouted. "Besides, we Westerners, colder in spirit and less imaginative, have to account for exotic passion. I admit that his words touched me. But I took his hand and said, 'It's impossible, my friend.'"

"Ah!" said Lionel, taking fresh courage and a cigarette.

"Ah!" said Lionel, feeling braver as he lit up a cigarette.

"My words," she continued, "seemed to carry conviction. I felt a hot tear fall on my hand, and there was silence. The next moment he stood up and salaamed gravely. 'Lady of my dreams,' he said, 'you have conquered. I will let you go ... at a price!'

"My words," she continued, "seemed to have real impact. I felt a warm tear drop onto my hand, and everything went quiet. The next moment, he stood up and bowed deeply. 'Lady of my dreams,' he said, 'you’ve won. I’ll let you go ... but at a cost!'"

"'What is the price?' I asked fearfully. He looked like a martyr.

"'What’s the price?' I asked nervously. He looked like a martyr."

"'My life,' he replied. 'I can give you up, but I can not live without you. You are free, but I must die.'"

"'My life,' he replied. 'I can let you go, but I can't live without you. You're free, but I have to die.'"

"Damned actor!" burst out Lionel, in the depths of despair, for he foresaw the end. "I beg your pardon—I beg your pardon—but——"

"Damned actor!" Lionel exclaimed, filled with despair, as he anticipated the end. "I'm sorry—I’m sorry—but——"

"He really meant it," said the lady with some petulance. "Please control yourself while I finish. Of course I could not think of allowing him to kill himself, so I reasoned with him. It was useless, for he was resolved. I even offered, at last, to resign my freedom and remain with him on the old terms: again he refused. 'No,' he said; 'it can not be, Dispenser of Delight. I have suffered too much. You must marry me or bid good-by to Turkey.'"

"He really meant it," the lady said, a bit annoyed. "Please try to keep calm while I finish. I definitely couldn't let him harm himself, so I tried to talk him out of it. It was pointless, though, because he was set on his decision. I even offered, in the end, to give up my freedom and stay with him under the same conditions: he still turned me down. 'No,' he said; 'that can't happen, Dispenser of Delight. I've been through too much. You have to marry me or say goodbye to Turkey.'"

"So you married him?" said Lionel gloomily. He had forgotten all his earlier doubts.

"So you married him?" Lionel said, sounding down. He had completely overlooked all his previous concerns.

"Yes. I could not bear to think of his suicide, for I liked him very well. Besides, I had grown less sentimental during my two years of 'life,' and believed I should find more happiness in such a union than in many that are supposed to be made for 'love.' But I must admit that romance found, and still finds, a corner in my heart. The primitive idea of marriage by capture is even now immensely popular. You see, the figure of Lukos, passionate, brave, reckless, fiery, ready to kill himself——"

"Yes. I couldn't stand the thought of his suicide, because I liked him a lot. Plus, I had become less sentimental during my two years of 'living,' and I believed I would find more happiness in such a union than in many that are thought to be based on 'love.' But I have to admit that romance has, and still does, hold a special place in my heart. The basic idea of marriage by capture is still hugely popular. You see, the image of Lukos—passionate, brave, reckless, fiery, ready to kill himself—"

"Oh, say he was a demigod," interrupted Lionel with bitterness, "and let us pass on."

"Oh, let’s just say he was a demigod," Lionel interrupted bitterly, "and let’s move on."

"All these Byronic attributes," said the lady calmly, "combined to whip my reluctant liking into a passable resemblance to love.... Well, I let him go—as far as the door. As he was opening it I made my decision and whispered 'Lukos!' He turned, looking like a magnificent tiger, crouching for a spring. A light gleamed from his eyes, rivaling the flash of his jeweled sword-hilt. With a bound——"

"All these Byronic traits," the lady said calmly, "came together to turn my hesitant feelings into something close to love.... Well, I let him leave—as far as the door. Just as he was opening it, I made my decision and whispered 'Lukos!' He turned, looking like a stunning tiger, ready to pounce. A light shone in his eyes, matching the sparkle of his jeweled sword hilt. With a leap——"

"Quite so—quite so!" said Lionel uncomfortably: the idea of being audience to such a love-scene was most repugnant. "I see—I see ... of course he would be immensely pleased—in fact, quite another man. Well, you married him——?"

"Exactly—exactly!" said Lionel, feeling uneasy: the thought of witnessing such a love scene was very unpleasant. "I get it—I get it... of course he would be really happy—in fact, he’d be a totally different person. So, you married him——?"

"The next day," said the lady. "The Patriarch of Jerusalem, who happened to be visiting the city at the time, made us one. And then I settled down to what I imagined would be a peaceful and happy life.

"The next day," the lady said. "The Patriarch of Jerusalem, who was visiting the city at that time, made us one. And then I settled down to what I thought would be a peaceful and happy life.

"And it was happy. Of course I now had as much freedom as I wished, and in a short while moved in the best European society in Constantinople. No hint of my story got abroad: it was understood that I had met Lukos in London. I wrote to my sister, telling the whole story and enjoining secrecy. She replied affectionately, giving me at the same time the news of my father's death, three months earlier. She suggested a visit, but various trifling incidents—such as influenza and a craze for Christian Science—continually postponed it until it was too late. Lukos and I also promised ourselves a trip to England, but that, too, never came about.... My little Lionel——"

"And it was great. Of course, I now had as much freedom as I wanted, and soon I was part of the best European society in Constantinople. No one knew about my past; it was assumed that I had met Lukos in London. I wrote to my sister, sharing the whole story and asking her to keep it a secret. She responded with warmth and let me know that our father had passed away three months earlier. She suggested I visit, but various minor issues—like getting the flu and a newfound interest in Christian Science—kept delaying it until it was too late. Lukos and I also planned a trip to England, but that never happened either... My little Lionel—"

The listener bounded in his chair. Then, recollecting himself, he apologized.

The listener jumped in his chair. Then, pulling himself together, he apologized.

"—My little Lionel was born a year after our marriage. He lived three weeks.... At the moment, I was stricken; but in a very short time I felt that he was fortunate. The end came thus—

"—My little Lionel was born a year after we got married. He lived for three weeks.... At that moment, I was devastated; but soon I realized he was lucky. The end came like this—

"A month later Lukos entered my room one afternoon with a grave face. 'My wife,' he said, 'you must be brave. We leave Constantinople to-night.'

"A month later, Lukos came into my room one afternoon with a serious expression. 'My wife,' he said, 'you need to be strong. We're leaving Constantinople tonight.'"

"'Why?' I asked.

"'Why?' I inquired."

"He explained hurriedly. It seemed that for months past the sultan had been intriguing with a foreign power against Great Britain. Lukos had got wind of the negotiations and knew the policy was fatal. He recognized that the interests of Turkey were bound up with those of England. He resolved to foil the sultan's plans. Two courses were open to him—a revolution and a new dynasty, or a disclosure of the plan to England. Averse from plunging his country into civil war, he resolved to try the latter first. After assiduous bribing he secured a draft of a secret treaty between the Porte and the other Power, but within twenty-four hours suspicion fell on him. He was warned that arrest was imminent. Flight was imperative.

"He explained quickly. It seemed that for months the sultan had been working with a foreign power against Great Britain. Lukos had caught wind of the negotiations and knew the policy was disastrous. He understood that Turkey's interests were linked with those of England. He decided to thwart the sultan's plans. He had two options—a revolution and a new dynasty, or revealing the plan to England. Unwilling to throw his country into civil war, he chose to try the latter first. After persistent bribing, he obtained a draft of a secret treaty between the Porte and the other power, but within twenty-four hours, suspicion fell on him. He was warned that arrest was imminent. He had to escape."

"'Disguise yourself as a pustchik (water-carrier) and go on board our yacht at once,' he said. Then, drawing a bundle of Cook's vouchers from his pocket, 'Take these in case anything happens. And this, too—it is the treaty. If anything happens to me, do not wait: fly to England and take the treaty to the English Foreign Office. I can not go with you now—there are duties to be done first—but I hope to join you. If I do not come by eleven o'clock, weigh anchor. I shall have died for my country. You will do this for the sake of Turkey?'

"'Disguise yourself as a pustchik (water-carrier) and get on our yacht right away,' he said. Then, pulling out a bundle of Cook's vouchers from his pocket, he added, 'Take these in case something happens. And this is the treaty. If anything happens to me, don’t wait: hurry to England and deliver the treaty to the English Foreign Office. I can’t come with you now—there are things I need to take care of first—but I hope to catch up with you. If I don't arrive by eleven o'clock, weigh anchor. I will have sacrificed myself for my country. Will you do this for the sake of Turkey?'"

"My eyes filled with tears, but I knew that I could serve him best by obedience. 'Yes, Lukos,' I said, and his eyes spoke his gratitude. We embraced and parted.

"My eyes filled with tears, but I knew that the best way to serve him was through obedience. 'Yes, Lukos,' I said, and his eyes expressed his gratitude. We hugged and said goodbye."

"I reached the yacht safely and found that steam was up already. The afternoon and evening passed like a heavy dream. At half past ten Lukos had not come. A quarter to eleven, and I was still alone. At eleven o'clock I wept (for I had grown to love him well), but I was true to my promise and ordered the captain to start. We reached Brindisi in due course, and there I determined to go overland to England, sending the yacht back in the hope that it might still be useful to my husband if by any chance he escaped. I did this, and in a very short time found myself in London."

"I got to the yacht safely and saw that it was already steaming. The afternoon and evening felt like a heavy dream. By 10:30, Lukos still hadn’t arrived. At a quarter to eleven, I was still by myself. When the clock struck eleven, I cried (as I had grown to care for him deeply), but I kept my promise and told the captain to set sail. We reached Brindisi eventually, and I decided to travel overland to England, sending the yacht back in hopes that it might still be helpful to my husband if he happened to escape. I did this, and soon enough, I found myself in London."

"And took a taxi to the F. O.?" said Lionel with interest. Really, it was a most exciting story.

"And took a taxi to the F. O.?" Lionel asked, intrigued. Honestly, it was such an exciting story.

"No," said the lady. "The day I reached town a note was left at my hotel—I had been dogged! It was written in Turkish and ran, 'The day the British government receives your communication, that day your husband dies.' There was neither address nor signature. It proved that I and my schemes were known, but—it proved that my husband was still alive.

"No," said the lady. "The day I got to town, a note was left at my hotel—I had been followed! It was written in Turkish and said, 'The day the British government gets your message, that day your husband dies.' There was no address or signature. It showed that I and my plans were known, but—it also proved that my husband was still alive.

"This gave me hope. With the treaty as a lever I might yet free Lukos. I have been working to that end for six months—ever since I came to England. It is a slow business, this diplomacy, but I am beginning to have strong hopes. And now I think it is almost the time to strike."

"This gave me hope. With the treaty as a lever, I might still be able to free Lukos. I have been working toward that goal for six months—ever since I arrived in England. This diplomacy is a slow process, but I’m starting to feel optimistic. And now I think it’s almost time to make a move."

"But you must be careful," said Lionel anxiously. "With such a document——"

"But you need to be careful," Lionel said anxiously. "With a document like that——"

She smiled faintly.

She gave a faint smile.

"Twice already they have made attempts." She opened a drawer in an escritoire near at hand. Within lay a small but serviceable revolver. "See! I always go armed. Of course it is useless to approach the police—that would sign Lukos' death-warrant at once.

"Twice already they have tried." She opened a drawer in a nearby desk. Inside was a small but practical revolver. "See! I always carry a weapon. Of course, it's pointless to go to the police—that would immediately seal Lukos' fate.

"But to return and finish my tale.... As soon as possible I wrote to my sister. I did not go to her, not wishing to involve her in my perils. I explained as much of the situation as I could, hinted at high politics, and begged her not to see me till I gave the word. She was puzzled, but obeyed. She wrote back a loving letter, the most important feature of which was the news that my share of my father's estate (eight hundred a year) could be drawn on at Coutts'. Already a handsome sum was to my credit, for I had not required any money while Lukos and I were together. So with this sum and Lukos' notes at my disposal I was in no need of money. But I soon found that I needed a hobby to keep me from thinking too much, and that brings me rapidly to the stage.

"But to go back and finish my story... As soon as I could, I wrote to my sister. I didn’t want to involve her in my troubles, so I didn’t visit her. I explained as much of the situation as I could, hinted at some important political matters, and asked her not to see me until I gave the go-ahead. She was confused but followed my request. She replied with a loving letter, the most significant part being the news that I could access my share of my father's estate (eight hundred a year) at Coutts'. There was already a nice amount credited to me since I hadn’t needed any money while Lukos and I were together. So with that money and Lukos' notes available, I didn’t need any cash. However, I soon realized I needed a hobby to keep my mind from wandering too much, and that leads me quickly to the stage."

"'A hobby' under such circumstances must sound curious: really, it is mere common sense. The paths of diplomacy I discovered were very steep, the movement of the wheels was very slow. When I had done everything possible and could think of nothing else, I had a great deal of time on my hands. Painting and music were not to my taste; acting was, for I had always had, like most young people, a liking for the stage. Also, like most young people, I believed I had the dramatic instinct. I got to know a manager—with money things are easy—and he gave me a small part, a few lines, in a new play. There was nothing in that, but what followed was really my one piece of luck. In return for a consideration he allowed me to understudy the lead, never dreaming my capacity would be tested. A fortnight later my principal slipped on a fruit-skin and broke her leg. (The incident gave rise to a correspondence on the Banana Fall in one of the cheaper papers.) I played the part that night, and, unlike most young people, my belief in myself was justified. I was a success. The manager, rejoicing that he need not look for a new principal, plumed himself on his discernment, and 'boomed' me for all he was worth.

"A hobby" in that context must sound strange: really, it’s just common sense. The roads of diplomacy I found were quite steep, and things moved very slowly. Once I had done everything I could and ran out of ideas, I found I had a lot of free time. Painting and music weren't my interests; acting was, since I had always, like most young people, enjoyed the theater. Also, like most young people, I thought I had a knack for drama. I got to know a manager—money makes things easier—and he gave me a small role, just a few lines, in a new play. It didn’t amount to much, but what happened next was truly my lucky break. For a fee, he allowed me to understudy the lead, never imagining my skills would actually be put to the test. Two weeks later, my lead slipped on a banana peel and broke her leg. (That incident sparked a series of articles about the Banana Fall in some of the cheaper papers.) I took over that night, and unlike most young people, my confidence was validated. I succeeded. The manager, thrilled that he didn’t have to find a new lead, took pride in his judgment and promoted me as much as he could.

"Well, I was a success; but naturally I had to pay the price. In this case the price was my sister's affection. From the first she had objected to my going on the stage: it was a case of conscientious prejudice, and that is one of the stubbornest things on earth. She had written daily letters of appeal, and all my arguments were useless. I do not wish to dwell on this ... enough to say that there grew an estrangement ... now, we do not even write...."

"Well, I was successful; but of course, I had to pay for it. In this case, the cost was my sister's love. From the start, she had been against me going on stage: it was a matter of strong beliefs, and that's one of the hardest things to change. She wrote me letters every day, pleading with me, but none of my arguments worked. I don't want to linger on this... just enough to say that we became estranged... now, we don't even write to each other...."

"Strange," said Lionel thoughtfully, "how even the best can be obstinate. I hope that time may——"

"Strange," said Lionel thoughtfully, "how even the best can be stubborn. I hope that time may——"

"That reminds me!" said the lady briskly, shaking off her sadness and glancing at the clock, "I shall be on again shortly. Will you do something for me? Thank you—I was sure you would. At a quarter to eleven go out and get me a cab or a taxi. Now, it is important that we should not be seen leaving the theater together—there will probably be spies. Oh, yes! I know it sounds absurd, but in this you must be guided by me. Get the cab and drive back by devious ways to the stage-door. There wait for me. I shall be ready by eleven-fifteen at the latest. That is all.... No! I forgot the reward!"

"That reminds me!" the lady said quickly, shaking off her sadness and glancing at the clock. "I’ll be on again shortly. Can you do something for me? Thanks—I knew you would. At a quarter to eleven, go out and get me a cab or a taxi. It’s really important that we don’t get seen leaving the theater together—there will probably be spies. I know it sounds crazy, but you need to trust me on this. Get the cab and take a roundabout route back to the stage door. Just wait for me there. I should be ready by eleven-fifteen at the latest. That’s all... No! I almost forgot the reward!"

"Reward!" he echoed, puzzled.

"Reward!" he repeated, confused.

"You forget you saved my life," she replied, smiling. "Close your eyes—promise you will not open them till I give you leave. You promise?"

"You forgot you saved my life," she said, smiling. "Close your eyes—promise me you won't open them until I say it's okay. Do you promise?"

"Yes," he laughed, still not understanding.

"Yeah," he laughed, still not getting it.

He closed his eyes and waited. With a mischievous smile she bent forward and kissed him lightly on the cheek. Lionel started. In a moment doubt was forgotten—forgotten the husband. All he knew was that a heavenly creature had deigned to kiss him. "Your promise!" she cried warningly, and by an effort of pride he kept his eyes closed. But he stood up, his arms held out. There was dead silence for a moment, and then—

He closed his eyes and waited. With a playful smile, she leaned in and lightly kissed his cheek. Lionel jolted. In an instant, all doubt faded—he forgot about the husband. All he felt was that an angelic being had chosen to kiss him. "Your promise!" she exclaimed with a hint of warning, and out of pride, he kept his eyes shut. But he stood up, his arms outstretched. There was a moment of complete silence, and then—

"Am I still bound?"

"Am I still obligated?"

"You are free," she said merrily. He opened his eyes, to find the reality more alluring than the dream. He seized her hands. She could not help shrinking a little, though her eyes shone defiance.

"You’re free," she said cheerfully. He opened his eyes, realizing that reality was more enticing than the dream. He grabbed her hands. She couldn't help but pull back slightly, even though her eyes sparkled with defiance.

"Why did you do that?" he breathed, aflame.

"Why did you do that?" he asked, furious.

She smiled mournfully.

She smiled sadly.

"Forgive me," she pleaded in tones that disarmed him.

"Forgive me," she begged in a way that caught him off guard.

Lionel remembered his rôle as a man of honor and dropped her hand.

Lionel remembered his role as a man of honor and let go of her hand.

"I beg your pardon," he said, but a little bitterly. She lowered her eyes.

"I’m sorry," he said, though there was a hint of bitterness in his voice. She looked down.

"It is I who should beg yours. I must go now. Eleven-fifteen!"

"It’s me who should be begging for yours. I have to go now. It’s eleven-fifteen!"

Feeling that romance was somewhat overworked, he replied, "Right ho!"

Feeling that romance was a bit excessive, he replied, "Sure thing!"


CHAPTER IV

BREAKERS AHEAD!

At eleven-thirty Lionel found himself enjoying a tête-à-tête supper in a Bloomsbury flat. He had obtained a cab, as commanded, and the lady and he had driven home together. There had been no adventures, no spies, no melodrama. In unromantic silence had they gone, for after the thrills of the afternoon and evening neither had been in the mood to talk. On reaching her flat, which was on the first floor, the lady had let herself in with a latch-key, and they had gone straight into the prettiest little sitting-room imaginable. Here a cold supper, simple but excellent, was laid: a bottle of hock and a siphon of lemonade were the only liquors visible. They supped together, talking briskly of various themes, but Lukos and the treaty were not mentioned till they had finished. When they had established themselves in armchairs and lighted a couple of cigarettes the lady said: "And now let me tell you what I want you to do. But first of all, will you please ring for coffee?"

At eleven-thirty, Lionel found himself enjoying a casual dinner in a Bloomsbury flat. He had gotten a cab as requested, and he and the lady had traveled home together. There were no adventures, no spies, no drama. They rode in comfortable silence, as after the excitement of the afternoon and evening, neither felt like talking. Upon arriving at her flat on the first floor, the lady let herself in with a latch-key, and they went straight into the cutest little sitting room you could imagine. There was a simple but delicious cold supper laid out: a bottle of hock and a siphon of lemonade were the only drinks in sight. They ate together, chatting animatedly about various topics, but they didn't mention Lukos or the treaty until they were done. Once they settled into armchairs and lit up a couple of cigarettes, the lady said, "Now let me tell you what I want you to do. But first, could you please call for coffee?"

Lionel obeyed, awaiting with some curiosity the expected newcomer. Would it be a smart maid, a mysterious man servant, or a crone with a history in every wrinkle? His doubts were speedily resolved. The door opened without noise, and there entered the most charming parlor maid the heart of man could wish. She was, of course, in a maid's livery—the black and white that is so simple, serviceable, and that can be so picturesque. Her figure was the trimmest imaginable, her eyes were a dusky brown, her hair was of jet. The last was arranged in a coiffure that a thoughtless man would have judged unstudied, but a schoolgirl of fifteen would have known its value at a glance. The features of this disturbing damsel were not faultless—the nose, for example, did not perfectly succeed, but her eyebrows looked as if they had been drawn by a painter, the mouth promised a treasury of kisses, and the complexion bespoke an air less rude than London's, for it shamed the most delicate of roses. Lionel was obliged to remind himself that the mistress had first claim on his affections.

Lionel complied, waiting with some curiosity for the expected newcomer. Would it be a clever maid, a mysterious butler, or an old woman with stories in every wrinkle? His uncertainties were quickly resolved. The door opened silently, and in walked the most charming parlor maid anyone could imagine. She was dressed in a classic maid's uniform—the simple black and white that is both practical and can look quite attractive. Her figure was perfectly shaped, her eyes a deep brown, and her hair was jet black. It was styled in a way that a careless man might think was effortless, but a fifteen-year-old girl would recognize its artistry immediately. The features of this captivating young woman weren’t flawless—the nose, for instance, was not perfectly shaped—but her eyebrows seemed expertly drawn, her mouth promised a treasure of kisses, and her complexion was more delicate than London’s, rivaling the finest roses. Lionel had to remind himself that his loyalty was to his mistress first.

"Clear the things, please, Mizzi," said the lady, not marking the stupor of her guest. "And then bring in coffee."

"Please clear the things, Mizzi," said the lady, not noticing her guest's daze. "And then bring in coffee."

("Mizzi!" thought Lionel. "Then she is a German or Austrian. And I called myself a Teuto-phobe!")

("Mizzi!" thought Lionel. "So she’s either German or Austrian. And I considered myself a Teuto-phobe!")

The supper was speedily cleared and the coffee brought. The lady sipped reflectively for a few moments, and then plunged into the business.

The dinner was quickly cleared away and the coffee was served. The woman sipped thoughtfully for a moment, and then got straight to the point.

"What I want you to do," she said abruptly, "is to help me break into a house."

"What I need you to do," she said suddenly, "is to help me break into a house."

Lionel was almost proof against surprises. You must remember that he had had some years of monotonous wear-and-tear at the hands of the world and at times longed for an adventure as some men long for drink. But he prided himself on his self-control, and had felt sure that he would meet any adventure with an assumption of ease, however joyful he might feel within. So far he had done pretty well: he had stopped a runaway horse, rescued a charming actress, spent a few thrilling hours in her company, and on the whole had kept himself in hand. But to be asked in a matter-of-fact tone to help in committing a felony was almost too much for his sang-froid. However, he remembered that good fortune has its price, and that great achievements need great sacrifices. Besides, she was so adorable, and he hated to back out of any enterprise.

Lionel was almost immune to surprises. You have to remember that he had spent years dealing with the dull grind of life, and sometimes he craved an adventure like some people crave a drink. But he took pride in his self-control and believed he could face any adventure with a calm exterior, no matter how excited he felt inside. So far, he had managed pretty well: he had stopped a runaway horse, rescued a lovely actress, spent some thrilling hours with her, and mostly kept himself together. But being asked in a straightforward way to help commit a crime was nearly too much for his cool demeanor. Still, he recalled that good fortune comes at a price, and that great achievements require great sacrifices. Plus, she was so charming, and he hated the idea of backing out of any venture.

"By all means," he said with a wan cheerfulness. "When shall I start?"

"Of course," he said with a forced cheerfulness. "When do I begin?"

She laughed.

She chuckled.

"That is so nice of you—not to ask why. I will tell you a little more, to assure you that our burglary is perfectly honorable. We start presently—in a day, two days, a week—I can not tell. The fact is that I think a crisis is approaching. I am sure that very soon a favorable opportunity will present itself to make use of the treaty. Some little time ago I determined to hide this document: it was no longer safe to keep it in my own hands."

"That's really nice of you—not to ask why. I'll share a bit more to reassure you that our burglary is completely honorable. We will set off soon—in a day, maybe two, or a week—I can’t say for sure. The truth is, I believe a crisis is on the horizon. I’m convinced that very soon, a good opportunity will arise to use the treaty. A little while ago, I decided to hide this document: it wasn't safe for me to keep it anymore."

"Why not a bank——" he began.

"Why not a bank—" he started.

"My friend, you have no idea of the importance of the affair. Probably the bank would have been safe, but governments do not stick at trifles when the destinies of nations are at stake. Almost certainly a colossal bribe would have been offered, and even bank officials are human. So I resolved to be simple, original and daring. I hid the treaty in a house not far from here. How it was done I will tell you another time. What I want you to do is to help me regain it. I would go alone, but now I have begun to think it better to have an aide, in case I fail. You realize what it may mean if we are caught? A prison—for you must not explain. Can you do that?"

"My friend, you have no idea how important this situation is. The bank probably would have been fine, but governments don’t worry about small things when the fates of nations are involved. Most likely, a huge bribe would have been offered, and even bank officials are just people. So, I decided to be straightforward, creative, and bold. I hid the treaty in a house not far from here. I’ll explain how I did it another time. What I need you to do is help me get it back. I would go alone, but I’ve started to think it’s better to have someone with me, just in case I don’t succeed. Do you understand what it could mean if we get caught? Prison—for you must not say a word about this. Can you do that?"

"I am ready," he said with a laugh. When she looked at him like that he felt that nothing mattered. Besides, it would be a thrill.

"I’m ready," he said with a laugh. When she looked at him like that, he felt that nothing else mattered. Plus, it would be exciting.

"Good," she said with enormous appreciation. "And now I am going to bed. I am very sleepy."

"Good," she said with great appreciation. "And now I'm heading to bed. I'm really sleepy."

He rose, gloomily wondering when he should see her again. "Well," he said, with an attempt at cheerfulness, "good night."

He got up, feeling down as he thought about when he would see her again. "Well," he said, trying to sound cheerful, "good night."

"You are going?" she asked in surprise. "But why? I want you to stop here."

"You’re leaving?" she asked, surprised. "But why? I want you to stay here."

Lionel's heart bounded, and then he looked at her. He was tempted to stay, for she was unlike any other girl he had ever met. But that very reason made him pause. He knew he wanted to kiss her and that he must not. He thought he was not in love with her, because he ought not to be. He knew that he would be in love with her if Lukos were dead. And because he felt that she mattered, he was resolved not to hurt her.

Lionel's heart raced, and then he looked at her. He was tempted to stay, since she was different from any girl he had ever met. But that very reason made him hesitate. He knew he wanted to kiss her, but he had to hold back. He thought he wasn't in love with her because he shouldn't be. He realized that he would be in love with her if Lukos were gone. And because he felt she was important, he was determined not to hurt her.

"I am sorry," he said, dropping his light tone. "I should like to, but—no!"

"I'm sorry," he said, dropping his cheerful tone. "I'd like to, but—no!"

"Why not?" she asked, looking steadily at him. He looked as steadily at her.

"Why not?" she asked, gazing intently at him. He gazed just as intently back at her.

"Convention," he said frankly. "If I stop here and people get to know, you will be slandered. That is why."

"Convention," he said honestly. "If I stop here and people find out, you'll be slandered. That's why."

She was silent for a moment and then said softly: "You are better than I thought.... You must certainly stop. As for 'people'—well, I know the world and its miry ways. I know and I do not care."

She was quiet for a moment and then said softly, "You’re better than I expected... You definitely need to stop. As for 'people'—I know the world and its messy ways. I understand, and I don't care."

"Your friends?" he suggested, rejoicing in her.

"Your friends?" he suggested, happy for her.

"I have only acquaintances, and they do not matter. Will that satisfy you?"

"I only have acquaintances, and they don't matter. Will that make you happy?"

He fought against the temptation with a jest, for he felt that the pretty creature could not really know: "You forget the disappointment of Mrs. Barker."

He joked to resist the temptation, as he sensed that the charming creature couldn't truly understand: "You’re forgetting how disappointed Mrs. Barker was."

She repeated the name wonderingly and he explained. "My landlady. If I do not return she will imagine I have run away to cheat her."

She said the name with curiosity, and he explained, "My landlady. If I don't come back, she'll think I've run off to cheat her."

It was a poor jest, but only a jest, and he was benumbed at its effect. The lady frowned terribly upon him. Anger swept her lovely features like a thunder-cloud.

It was a bad joke, but just a joke, and he was stunned by how it affected him. The lady glared at him fiercely. Anger washed over her beautiful face like a storm cloud.

"How could you?" she cried in heavenly wrath. "How paltry! How pitiable! I knew you for a cheerful gentleman, but to find you a trivial scoffer——"

"How could you?" she exclaimed in heavenly anger. "How pathetic! How sad! I thought you were a cheerful guy, but to discover you're just a petty mocker——"

"Why, what have I done?" he stammered, amazed. "It was a mere joke—a laughing phrase—a word——"

"Why, what have I done?" he stammered, astonished. "It was just a joke—a funny phrase—a word——"

"Done!" she echoed. "We were both upon the heights, and with your phrase—your joke—your word, you drag us down to the abyss of banality again. I——"

"Done!" she repeated. "We were both at the top, and with your phrase—your joke—your word, you pull us back down to the depths of mediocrity again. I——"

Her petulance annoyed him.

Her stubbornness irritated him.

"Really, madam," he said bitingly, "I am sorry to have spoiled it—to have 'let down the scene,' as they say on the stage. But as I seem to have offended you I shall take my leave."

"Honestly, ma'am," he said sharply, "I'm sorry to have messed it up—to have 'ruined the moment,' as they say in theater. But since it looks like I've upset you, I'll take my leave."

"If you do," she cried, "I shall never speak to you again. I swear it!"

"If you do," she yelled, "I will never talk to you again. I swear!"

He stood irresolute. After all, she looked such a darling when she was angry....

He stood unsure. After all, she looked so cute when she was angry....

"Well," he said, temporizing, "if I stay for a while, will you promise to be sensible?"

"Well," he said, pausing, "if I stick around for a bit, will you promise to be reasonable?"

"Never!" she flashed, stamping her foot, and darted from the room.

"Never!" she shouted, stomping her foot, and ran out of the room.

Amusement and anger struggled for the victory in Lionel's heart. "Confound her for her folly!" he thought, and then, "Bless her for her inconsequence!" He sat down and lighted a cigarette, expecting her return at any minute, determined to stick to his resolve and sleep at home.

Amusement and anger battled for control in Lionel's heart. "Damn her for being so foolish!" he thought, and then, "Thank goodness for her unpredictability!" He sat down and lit a cigarette, expecting her to come back any minute, determined to stick to his plan and sleep at home.

When twenty minutes had passed he reflected, "She is standing on her dignity. How foolish!" Ten minutes later he murmured, with a pained accent, "She is human after all." By the time his fourth cigarette was half-consumed he had fairly lost his temper. "This is not good enough," he said; "I will let myself out and call to-morrow. If she refuses to see me, at least I shall have kept my self-respect. No woman shall treat me like a dog."

When twenty minutes had gone by, he thought, "She's just being stubborn. How silly!" Ten minutes later, he sighed with frustration, "She’s only human, after all." By the time he had smoked half of his fourth cigarette, he had completely lost his patience. "This isn’t acceptable," he said; "I’ll leave and come back tomorrow. If she won’t see me, at least I’ll have maintained my dignity. No woman is going to treat me like a doormat."

Grumbling, he opened the door and went quietly out into the hall. He listened for a moment, waiting to give her the chance to reappear and part as friends. There was no sound: if it had not been for the light still burning in the hall he would have sworn that the household had gone to sleep.

Grumbling, he opened the door and stepped quietly into the hall. He listened for a moment, hoping to give her the chance to come back and part as friends. There was no sound: if it hadn’t been for the light still on in the hall, he would have thought that everyone in the house had gone to sleep.

With a sigh he put on his hat and opened the inner door. He anticipated no trouble with the outer barrier, but in this he was wrong. It was padlocked, and flight was impossible. His sense of humor conquered resentment, and he smiled. "I give in," he thought: "well, I have tried to be a good boy." He hung up his hat again and returned to the sitting-room. Then he rang the bell. As he had expected, it was answered by the maid.

With a sigh, he put on his hat and opened the inner door. He didn’t expect any issues with the outer door, but he was mistaken. It was padlocked, making escape impossible. His sense of humor overcame his frustration, and he smiled. "I give up," he thought, "well, I tried to be good." He hung his hat back up and went back to the sitting room. Then he rang the bell. As he had expected, the maid answered.

"Monsieur wishes to retire?" she asked, with a polite sympathy for a handsome man.

"Monsieur wants to retire?" she asked, with polite sympathy for a handsome man.

"I should prefer to be let to go home," he said pleasantly, "but I suppose I'm to be kept a prisoner."

"I would rather be allowed to go home," he said cheerfully, "but I guess I'm going to be kept here like a prisoner."

The maid looked puzzled.

The maid seemed confused.

"Madame has locked the door and gone to sleep this half-hour. I dare not wake her for the keys. Besides, she expects you to remain."

"Madame has locked the door and gone to sleep for the past half hour. I can’t wake her for the keys. Besides, she expects you to stay."

"Then will you show me my room, please?" he said, accepting defeat. Whether Mizzi was as innocent as she seemed he could not decide, but now he was determined to let things take their course. She held the door open for him, and as he passed he caught an amused twinkle in her eyes. He yearned to give her a good shaking and say "Explain!" and presently kiss her heartily, for she was exceedingly attractive. This impulse he controlled, and the next moment found himself in his bedroom.

"Then could you show me my room, please?" he asked, resigning himself to the situation. He couldn't tell if Mizzi was as innocent as she appeared, but he was now set on letting things unfold naturally. She held the door open for him, and as he walked by, he noticed a playful sparkle in her eyes. He felt a strong urge to give her a good shake and demand, "Explain!" and then kiss her warmly, as she was incredibly attractive. He held back that impulse, and a moment later found himself in his bedroom.

"Breakfast is at half past nine," said Mizzi, as she drew a curtain. "At what time does monsieur wish to be called?"

"Breakfast is at nine-thirty," Mizzi said as she pulled the curtain closed. "What time does sir want to be woken up?"

"Oh ... about nine o'clock ... thank you ... good night."

"Oh ... around nine o'clock ... thanks ... good night."

"Good night, monsieur," said the maid demurely as she tripped to the door, and then a lamentable accident occurred. It was due to the eccentricities of modern fashion. For several years Lionel had carried his handkerchief secreted in his cuff. As Mizzi stepped daintily past, the handkerchief, which had been working loose, fell to the ground. He and she stooped together for its recovery, and their heads approached nearer than was discreet. Her fingers reached the handkerchief first, and she restored it as they were rising. This was pardonable, but she ought not to have looked him in the face. Her eyes telegraphed "I like you," and his, something more. Without judicious reflection Lionel clasped her. "You are a perfect darling!" he whispered, "and I simply must kiss you—it is what you were made for."

"Good night, sir," the maid said shyly as she skipped to the door, and then an unfortunate accident happened. It was a result of the quirks of modern fashion. For a few years, Lionel had kept his handkerchief hidden in his cuff. As Mizzi walked gracefully by, the handkerchief, which had been coming loose, fell to the ground. They both bent down to pick it up, bringing their heads closer than was appropriate. Her fingers touched the handkerchief first, and she handed it back to him as they stood up. This was excusable, but she shouldn't have looked him in the eye. Her gaze conveyed "I like you," while his said something more. Without thinking it through, Lionel embraced her. "You are absolutely wonderful!" he whispered, "and I just have to kiss you—it’s what you were made for."

"Oh, monsieur!" gasped Mizzi, "it is a scandal!"

"Oh, sir!" gasped Mizzi, "it's a scandal!"

"Yes," agreed Lionel, "I suppose it is. But it would be a graver scandal not to kiss such a bouquet of charms. There, my attractive morsel—another ... a butterfly salutation on your charming eyes, and ... good night."

"Yes," Lionel agreed, "I guess it is. But it would be a bigger scandal not to kiss such a beautiful bouquet of charms. There, my lovely one—another ... a quick kiss to your lovely eyes, and ... good night."

Mizzi, with a stifled laugh, kissed him lightly in return, freed herself and escaped. Lionel, his sleepiness a thing of the past, sat down on the bed.

Mizzi, holding back a laugh, gave him a quick kiss in response, pulled away, and made her escape. Lionel, now fully awake, sat down on the bed.

"Dash it!" he thought, wagging his head, "I oughtn't to have done that ... but it was exceedingly pleasant ... exceedingly pleasant ... yet I ought not to have yielded to temptation, for I was under the vague impression that I was in love with the maid's mistress. If so, I was disloyal, a creature of no account. Let us see whether there is not something to be said for the defense....

"Curse it!" he thought, shaking his head, "I shouldn't have done that ... but it was really enjoyable ... really enjoyable ... yet I shouldn't have given in to temptation, since I had a vague feeling that I was in love with the maid's mistress. If that's the case, I was being disloyal, a person of no importance. Let’s see if there’s anything to argue for my defense...."

"Suppose I do love her—the mistress, I mean—I must not kiss her, because she is married. Doubtless it would be a fine thing to be loyal to the husband, the lady and the ideal—in short, neither kiss her nor any one else. In a word, become a sort of grass-bachelor.... A hard matter, for I am not cast in the ascetic mold, and Mizzi's lips are devilish tempting.... Suppose, now, the husband died (and I regret that I can not regard this contingency with disgust) and there were at least a sporting chance of my stepping into his shoes—oh! of course not at once, but later—later—why, then I could face permanent loyalty and temporary asceticism with a light heart.... But to go through the world refusing all sweets because my favorite sweet has been appropriated, surely that were foolish.

"Let’s say I do love her—the mistress, I mean—I can’t kiss her because she’s married. It would be great to stay loyal to the husband, the lady, and the concept of it all—in other words, not kiss her or anyone else. Basically, I’d need to become some sort of celibate... That’s a tough situation because I’m not exactly the type to be all ascetic, and Mizzi’s lips are incredibly tempting... Now, suppose the husband died (and I’m honestly not disgusted by that idea) and there was at least a chance I could step into his role—oh! of course not right away, but later—later—then I could handle permanent loyalty and a temporary dry spell without a worry... But to go through life denying myself all pleasures just because my favorite pleasure is being taken by someone else, that seems pretty silly."

"Again, am I in love with her? Can one fall in love so suddenly, outside the realm of fiction? Is there not a great truth in the popular ballad that treats of 'a tiny seed of love'? Surely love is a seed, planted by chance or design—for example, by a match-making mama? The seed needs opportunity for gradual growth—the sun of frequent intercourse—the rain of timely separation—the fertilizer of presents of flowers and bonbons—before it can grow to a splendid harvest.... This harvest of mine can not be love; it must be passion. If so, it must be crushed.... She is too perfect to sully even in thought."

"Am I really in love with her? Can someone fall in love so quickly, outside of stories? Isn't there some truth in the popular song about 'a tiny seed of love'? Surely love is like a seed, planted by chance or intentionally—like a matchmaking mom, perhaps? The seed needs the right conditions to grow—a lot of time spent together, the right amount of space apart, and sweet gifts like flowers and chocolates—before it can blossom into something amazing.... But what I have can't be love; it must be passion. And if that's the case, it should probably be crushed.... She's too perfect to even think about ruining."

His brow grew gloomy, and he paced the room with feverish steps.

His brow became dark, and he paced the room with restless steps.

"No!" he said presently, "I feel pretty sure it is not passion pure and simple—or impure and complex if you like. Critics may sneer, but I can not help thinking it may soon be love, if it is not that already. Wherefore, I had better fly to do her errands as soon as possible.... But I can not accept the ascetic ideal ... yet. Hypothetical Mizzis may cross my path, and if they do I feel sure I shall kiss them, but the moment I see a possible chance of winning her, why, then I shall be very good.

"No!" he said after a moment, "I'm pretty sure this isn't just simple passion—or complicated and messy, if you prefer. Critics might roll their eyes, but I can't help thinking it could soon be love, if it isn’t already. So, I should probably hurry and do her errands as soon as I can... But I can't embrace the ascetic ideal... not yet. Possible women may come my way, and if they do, I’m sure I’ll kiss them, but the moment I see a real chance to win her, well, then I'll behave myself."

"... 'Myes ... not very lofty ... but I want to be honest, and feel pretty sure that is what I shall do.... No doubt I shall not be happy, but...?"

"... 'Myes ... not very lofty ... but I want to be honest, and feel pretty sure that is what I shall do.... No doubt I shall not be happy, but...?"

With a dissatisfied growl he began to undress, and soon he was in bed. To quiet his uneasy conscience before he fell asleep he muttered, "And of course I shall do anything she tells me."

With a frustrated growl, he started to take off his clothes, and soon he was in bed. To calm his anxious conscience before falling asleep, he muttered, "And of course, I'll do anything she asks me."

The unheroic but truthful pleasure-seeker then gave an unromantic snore.

The unheroic but honest pleasure-seeker then let out a loud, unromantic snore.


CHAPTER V

THE PLOT THICKENS

A knock on his door roused Lionel at half past eight, and he sprang up clear-eyed and joyous to meet the sun. The events of the previous day sped pleasantly through his brain; and now that the morning was upon him and the London sparrows twittering optimism, he could not dwell seriously on the indignation of his hostess. "Oh, it is bound to be all right!" he said to himself, stropping a razor that he found on the dressing-table and whistling a merry tune. The cold tub strung him to a higher mood, and as he plied the towel he broke into song. "Horchen Sie doch!" said Mizzi approvingly to the cat, as she prepared breakfast and heard the melodious strain: "Er ist ein braver Kerl, der sich nicht erzürnt. Er ist ein lustiger Geist, wirklich. Die anderen habe ich zum Besten." No doubt she was right.

A knock on his door woke Lionel up at 8:30, and he jumped up, clear-headed and happy to greet the sun. The events of the previous day happily raced through his mind; and now that morning had arrived and the London sparrows were chirping cheerfully, he couldn’t focus on his hostess’s anger. "Oh, it’s all going to be fine!" he told himself, sharpening a razor he found on the dresser and whistling a lively tune. The cold shower lifted his mood, and as he dried off with a towel, he burst into song. "Horchen Sie doch!" said Mizzi approvingly to the cat while preparing breakfast, listening to the cheerful melody: "Er ist ein braver Kerl, der sich nicht erzürnt. Er ist ein lustiger Geist, wirklich. Die anderen habe ich zum Besten." She was probably right.

Lionel breakfasted alone. Mizzi said that her mistress begged to be excused for an hour; after that she would be ready. The maid lingered a moment more than was necessary after bringing in the coffee, and seemed markedly assiduous for his comfort. But Lionel did not detain her in conversation; he had no intention of elaborating the affaire of the previous night. What amusement fell to his share he was ready to accept with a youthful zest, but he was old enough not to pursue happiness too zealously nor to magnify trifles. A kiss was well enough, provided it embarrassed neither the recipient nor himself. He was never a man to raise false hopes or win success by lies or a pretended love. His philosophy embraced the theory that girls, or some of them at least, liked being petted, and he was not averse from the kindly office. Only, there must be a clear, if unspoken, understanding that he was not to be taken au sérieux. This philosophy, of course, did not apply to Beatrice Blair: she was altogether outside routine. He was a butterfly, if you like, but at any rate honest.

Lionel had breakfast by himself. Mizzi said her mistress asked to be excused for an hour; after that, she'd be ready. The maid lingered a bit longer than necessary after bringing in the coffee and seemed particularly attentive to his comfort. But Lionel didn't keep her in conversation; he had no intention of going into details about the situation from the night before. He was willing to enjoy whatever fun came his way with youthful enthusiasm, but he was old enough not to chase happiness too eagerly or to blow small matters out of proportion. A kiss was fine, as long as it didn't embarrass either him or the other person. He was never the type to raise false hopes or achieve success through lies or fake affection. His philosophy was that some girls liked being sweet-talked, and he didn't mind playing that role. However, there had to be a clear, if unspoken, understanding that he shouldn't be taken seriously. This philosophy, of course, didn't apply to Beatrice Blair: she was completely different from the norm. He might be a butterfly, if you will, but at least he was honest.

So when Mizzi hoped that monsieur had slept well, he said gravely, "Perfectly, ma p'tite," and asked for the morning's newspaper. She brought it, with a pout of resentment, and as she handed it to him discovered a fly on his collar. This she was allowed to remove with the most absolute decorum; but when the operation was finished and she smiled persuasively, he stroked her hair paternally and said, "You must not be foolish, my child." Mizzi retired with a heightened color, and he sat down with satisfaction to the cricket reports and deviled kidneys. To tell the truth, in spite of his arguments he felt slightly ashamed of the momentary swerve from loyalty.

So when Mizzi hoped that the gentleman had slept well, he said seriously, "Perfectly, ma p'tite," and asked for the morning newspaper. She brought it, a bit annoyed, and as she handed it to him, she noticed a fly on his collar. She was allowed to remove it with the utmost decorum; but when she finished and smiled charmingly, he stroked her hair affectionately and said, "You mustn't be silly, my child." Mizzi left with flushed cheeks, and he sat down with satisfaction to read the cricket reports and enjoy deviled kidneys. To be honest, despite his justifications, he felt a bit ashamed of the brief lapse in loyalty.

His hostess appeared in due course, looking exceedingly pretty and self-possessed. She was dressed smartly in blue, a color that contrasted favorably with her hair and eyes. Lionel thrilled with gladness at the sight of her, for in brief moments of doubt he had thought that perhaps his imagination had played tricks: the night and artificial lights might possibly have lent her a fascination that would pass with the dawn. Could there indeed be so delightful a creature in London? These doubts, it must be insisted, had been exceedingly brief; still, they had had existence, and the joy of seeing them dissolve like frost in sunlight made life more desirable than ever.

His hostess soon appeared, looking incredibly pretty and composed. She was dressed smartly in blue, a color that complemented her hair and eyes. Lionel felt a surge of happiness at the sight of her, as he had briefly doubted whether his imagination had deceived him: the night and artificial lights might have given her a charm that would fade with the morning. Could there really be such a delightful person in London? These doubts, it should be noted, were fleeting; still, they existed, and the joy of watching them melt away like frost in the sunlight made life more appealing than ever.

There was no embarrassment at the meeting. Both were highly civilized, educated, up-to-date; with a kindred instinct of what to admit or ignore, a knowledge of the times when silence or speech was best. The lady made no reference to the impasse of the night before, and Lionel was too full of the present to dwell churlishly on the past. Instead, they talked cheerfully of trivialities for a time, and then Miss Blair announced her intention of going out to do some shopping. "I will not ask you to come with me," she observed smiling, "for I can guess how bored you would be. But I shall be with you again for lunch. For the present, au revoir."

There was no awkwardness at the meeting. Both were very refined, educated, and current; they shared a mutual understanding of what to discuss or overlook, and they knew when it was better to be silent or to speak. The lady did not mention the impasse from the night before, and Lionel was too caught up in the moment to dwell negatively on the past. Instead, they chatted happily about small talk for a while, and then Miss Blair stated her intention to go shopping. "I won't ask you to join me," she said with a smile, "because I can tell how bored you would be. But I'll see you again for lunch. For now, au revoir."

Lionel, who would cheerfully have carried a score of parcels or hat-boxes for the pleasure of her company, had no choice but to acquiesce. There was no pressing reason for returning to his lodgings—indeed, there was every reason for staying away until he could earn some money. True, there was no immediate prospect of acquiring any; but at least he was in the middle of an interesting experience, and he had promised to help in a burglary. So with a fine disregard of circumstances he chose the most comfortable armchair and the lightest novel he could find, and put the cigarette-box within easy reach. Thus he passed an unprofitable but pleasant morning.

Lionel, who would happily have carried a bunch of bags or hat boxes just to enjoy her company, had no choice but to agree. There was no real reason to go back to his place—actually, there were plenty of reasons to stay gone until he could make some money. Sure, there was no chance of that coming anytime soon; but at least he was in the middle of an interesting situation, and he had promised to help with a burglary. So, without worrying about anything else, he picked the comfiest armchair and the lightest book he could find, and set the cigarette box within easy reach. This is how he spent a not-so-productive but enjoyable morning.

Miss Blair returned soon after one o'clock, and they had lunch together. In the afternoon they went for a drive in a hired motor to Thames Ditton. They stopped there for tea and got back to Bloomsbury about seven. Lionel was put down at the flat and Miss Blair went on to the theater, from which she returned late at night. Supper followed, and then they smoked and chatted for half an hour before going to bed. Lionel had expected to hear more of the conspiracy and projected felony, but nothing was said. Wherefore he kept silence, awaited events, and went to sleep, wondering whether a farce or tragedy was being played.

Miss Blair came back shortly after one o'clock, and they had lunch together. In the afternoon, they took a drive in a rented car to Thames Ditton. They stopped there for tea and got back to Bloomsbury around seven. Lionel was dropped off at the apartment, and Miss Blair went on to the theater, returning late at night. They had supper, then smoked and chatted for half an hour before heading to bed. Lionel had expected to hear more about the conspiracy and planned crime, but nothing was mentioned. So, he stayed quiet, waited for what would happen next, and fell asleep, wondering if a comedy or tragedy was being played out.

This uneventful life went on for several days, during which he had plenty of time to study his hostess. He learned nothing more than he knew already. A brilliant and charming personality, grave or humorous as occasion demanded, apparently sincere in her conviction of a great conspiracy, devoted to her absent husband, resolute to strike when opportunity offered—such was Beatrice Blair. When he was in her company he could not doubt her; alone, he could not help wondering what this Arabian Night might mean. The utter fantasy of it all bewildered him, but even if false he could not conceive her motive. In the end he usually came back to the conclusion that the apparently absurd was true, and always that at all costs he would see it through to the end.

This uneventful life continued for several days, during which he had plenty of time to observe his hostess. He didn’t learn anything new beyond what he already knew. Beatrice Blair was a brilliant and charming person, serious or humorous as the situation required, seemingly genuine in her belief in a grand conspiracy, dedicated to her absent husband, and determined to act when the chance arose. When he was with her, he couldn’t doubt her; when he was alone, he couldn’t help wondering what this story might really mean. The sheer fantasy of it all confused him, but even if it was false, he couldn’t figure out her motive. In the end, he usually returned to the conclusion that what seemed absurd was actually true, and he always resolved to see it through to the end, no matter what.

Her attitude to him was that of a gay comrade. There were no more "gratitude" kisses—no hint of danger. She had referred only once again to his act of stopping the runaway horse and her wish to do something to show her thankfulness. This he had laughed at; now that the opportunity had come he was loath to use it; but in a subsequent conversation she had learned that he had written several plays, all unacted, perhaps even unread. One lay at that moment in the office of Ashford Billing, a prominent manager; she knew him, and promised to spur him to read Lionel's play himself. Lionel thanked her, but did not build any castles on so flimsy a foundation. He had been knocking at managers' doors too many years to have any illusions.

Her attitude toward him was that of a friendly companion. There were no more "thank you" kisses—no hint of danger. She had only mentioned his act of stopping the runaway horse once again and her desire to do something to show her gratitude. He had laughed at that; now that the chance had come, he was reluctant to take it. However, in a later conversation, she found out that he had written several plays, all of which had never been performed, maybe even never read. One was sitting at that moment in the office of Ashford Billing, a well-known manager; she knew him and promised to encourage him to read Lionel's play himself. Lionel thanked her but didn't get his hopes up on such a shaky foundation. He had been knocking on managers' doors for too many years to have any illusions.

So day followed day without anything to break the pleasant monotony. Lionel and Beatrice were rapidly cementing a friendship that was more than a friendship to him. Only the remembrance of Lukos kept him from showing something more of his real feelings—the remembrance of Lukos and the aloof friendliness of Beatrice herself. There was but one fly in the amber of that perfect week, and that was the attitude of Mizzi.

So day followed day without anything to interrupt the nice routine. Lionel and Beatrice were quickly building a friendship that meant more than just friendship to him. Only the memory of Lukos held him back from showing more of his true feelings—the memory of Lukos and Beatrice's distant friendliness. There was just one flaw in that perfect week, and that was Mizzi's attitude.

Since the morning after his arrival Mizzi had waited on him with an air of courteous disapproval. She had been as polite as ever, as demure and piquant as could be wished, but she had been less communicative, less sympathique with the stranger. Even in the presence of her mistress there was a suggestion of frigidity that was galling to a sensitive man. Lionel grudgingly admitted that perhaps he had been a little to blame, but, illogically enough, he resented the atmosphere of respectful condemnation. More than once he had tried to dissipate the unhappy misunderstanding, to restore things to a more friendly—but not too friendly—footing. In this he had not been successful. To his cheerful and carefully composed commonplaces Mizzi made the briefest of answers, and on one occasion there had been a distinct toss of the head and an unmistakable sniff. "Women are so unreasonable," he said to himself complainingly, after a sustained effort that fell flat; then with a pang of compunction, "Some women, I mean. I do wish Mizzi would be sensible.... It is very trying."

Since the morning after his arrival, Mizzi had attended to him with a tone of polite disapproval. She had been as courteous as ever, as modest and charming as anyone could wish, but she had been less talkative, less sympathique with the stranger. Even in front of her mistress, there was a hint of coldness that annoyed a sensitive man. Lionel reluctantly acknowledged that he might have been a bit at fault, but, illogically, he resented the atmosphere of respectful judgment. More than once, he had tried to clear up the unfortunate misunderstanding, to bring things back to a more friendly—but not too friendly—level. In this, he had not succeeded. To his cheerful and carefully constructed small talk, Mizzi offered the briefest responses, and at one point, she had distinctly tossed her head and gave a clear sniff. "Women are so unreasonable," he thought to himself, feeling frustrated after a prolonged effort that fell flat; then, with a twinge of guilt, "Some women, I mean. I do wish Mizzi would be sensible.... It is very trying."

Matters came to a head after he had been Miss Blair's guest for nearly a week. It was a Saturday, and his hostess went to the theater directly after lunch to get ready for the matinée. Lionel, provided with one of her cards, was to follow her and see the play, for as yet he had not watched her on the stage. The experience proved delightful, for the play was good and her acting excellent. After it was over he went back to the flat alone, for she meant to rest in her dressing-room until the evening performance.

Things reached a turning point after he had been Miss Blair's guest for about a week. It was a Saturday, and his hostess went to the theater right after lunch to prepare for the matinée. Lionel, with one of her tickets, was to follow her in and see the play, as he hadn't seen her perform on stage yet. The experience was wonderful, as the play was good and her acting was outstanding. After it finished, he returned to the flat alone since she planned to rest in her dressing room until the evening performance.

Mizzi opened the door to Lionel, and when he asked her to bring tea she said, "Immediately, m'sieur," in the most correct of tones. Disapproval still hung heavily about her, mixed, as it seemed, with something of compassion. Her attitude was almost that of a perfect mother to a well-meaning but erring child. "Hang it!" thought Lionel, as he waited in the sitting-room, "she has no business to behave like this. I have a good mind ... a jolly good mind to..." He fell into a reverie and gloomily whistled the opening bars of Chopin's Marche Funèbre.

Mizzi opened the door for Lionel, and when he asked her to bring tea, she responded, "Right away, sir," in the most polite tone. Disapproval still lingered around her, mixed with what seemed like a touch of compassion. Her demeanor was almost that of a perfect mother to a well-meaning but misguided child. "Darn it!" thought Lionel, as he waited in the living room, "she shouldn't be acting like this. I'm seriously considering ... really considering to..." He drifted off into thought and gloomily whistled the opening notes of Chopin's Marche Funèbre.

Presently the maid brought in tea. She set the tray on a little table, placed a cake-stand within easy reach, paused to make sure she had forgotten nothing, and then asked, "Is there anything more, m'sieur?"

Currently, the maid brought in tea. She set the tray on a small table, placed a cake stand within easy reach, paused to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything, and then asked, "Is there anything else, sir?"

Lionel, who had come to a resolution while waiting, roused himself.

Lionel, who had come to a decision while waiting, shook himself awake.

"Yes," he said decisively, "there is. Will you be kind enough Mizzi, to tell me why you surround me with the wet-blanket of your wrath? It is very depressing to a sunny nature."

"Yes," he said firmly, "there is. Would you be so kind, Mizzi, to tell me why you're wrapping me in the damp blanket of your anger? It really brings down someone with a sunny disposition."

Mizzi looked at him with a frank pity in her eyes. "It is because I am sorry," she replied.

Mizzi looked at him with genuine pity in her eyes. "It's because I feel sorry for you," she replied.

"That is no explanation," said Lionel briskly, glad to perceive a thaw, however slight. "Why are you sorry?"

"That's not an explanation," Lionel said quickly, happy to notice even a small change. "Why do you feel sorry?"

"Because you are a fool," observed Mizzi with a gentle pensiveness.

"Because you’re an idiot," Mizzi remarked with a soft thoughtfulness.

Lionel started; he had not expected this. To be called a fool by a friend of one's own age and sex is an every-day matter that causes no uneasiness. To be called a fool by a withered graybeard need not leave a sting, for there is the comfortable reflection that the graybeard may be repeating a mere formula, and that he, too, enjoyed being a fool in his day. To be called a fool by a youthful enemy is only to be expected, and the epithet betrays a palpable lack of judgment in the user, an epithet that returns like a boomerang upon himself. But to be called a fool by a pretty woman is a distinct ordeal. Lionel was shaken.

Lionel was taken aback; he hadn't seen this coming. Being called a fool by a friend of the same age and gender is a common occurrence that doesn’t really bother anyone. Being called a fool by an old man doesn’t typically leave a mark either, since it’s reassuring to think that the old man might just be sticking to a cliché, and that he probably had his own foolish moments in the past. When a young enemy calls you a fool, it’s just to be expected, and it shows their clear lack of judgment, reflecting back on them. But hearing the same insult from an attractive woman is a whole different experience. Lionel felt unsettled.

He contrived to compass a laugh. It was not an infectious cachinnation, but still it was a laugh. "Will you tell me why I am a fool?" he asked in a moment.

He managed to break into a laugh. It wasn't a contagious one, but it was still a laugh. "Can you tell me why I'm a fool?" he asked after a moment.

"Certainly," said Mizzi, still in the same gentle tone. "It is because you are the slave of my mistress."

"Of course," said Mizzi, still in the same gentle tone. "It's because you belong to my mistress."

"Excuse me," said Lionel politely, "but I have no wish to discuss her. You may go."

"Excuse me," Lionel said politely, "but I don't want to discuss her. You can leave."

At this the maid lost some of her admirable self-control. "Bah!" she cried, "you are the same as the rest! Show a man a pretty face and a pair of dazzling eyes, and he is blinded! You think her perfect——"

At this, the maid lost some of her impressive self-control. "Ugh!" she exclaimed, "you're just like the others! Show a guy a pretty face and a pair of shining eyes, and he becomes blind to everything else! You think she's perfect——"

"I know she is," he interrupted, "though why I should trouble to say so to a servant——"

"I know she is," he interrupted, "but why should I bother to say that to a servant——"

The thrust was cruel, but he felt she had deserved it.

The push was harsh, but he felt she had brought it on herself.

"A servant!" she repeated, sparkling with anger. "A servant! Yes, it is true—but an honest true woman that knows not how to tell lies like her mistress——"

"A servant!" she repeated, her eyes flashing with anger. "A servant! Yes, that's true—but an honest woman who doesn't know how to lie like her mistress——"

"That is enough," said Lionel, taking her with a gentle firmness by the arm. "My tea, I fear, must be getting cold."

"That's enough," Lionel said, gently taking her by the arm. "I'm afraid my tea is getting cold."

As soon as he touched her the virago subsided. She made not the least resistance as he led her to the door. But as he was opening it she looked up with appealing eyes. "Ah, monsieur!" she whispered piteously; but he was in no mood to be melted. He shut the door upon her, and did not see the rainbow of smiles that played over her face the moment she was in safety.

As soon as he touched her, the fierce woman calmed down. She offered no resistance as he guided her to the door. But just as he was opening it, she looked up with pleading eyes. "Oh, sir!" she whispered sadly; but he wasn’t in a mood to be swayed. He closed the door on her, completely missing the smile that lit up her face the moment she was safe.

"She is jealous," mused Lionel, pouring out a cup of tea; "I did not think she would have been so silly."

"She’s jealous," thought Lionel, pouring himself a cup of tea. "I didn’t think she’d be so silly."

He wagged his head sadly over the frailty of human nature, and then an unpleasant thought struck him—the accusation of her mistress. "Lies" had been the charge—an ugly word—and on the face of things somewhat plausible. Again he reviewed the arguments for the defense—the lack of all apparent motive for deceit, his uselessness from a blackmailer's standpoint, and the rest,—and the strength of them gave him fresh courage. The strongest argument of all, the remembrance of Beatrice herself, almost clenched the matter. Almost, for he was cautious, and had some knowledge of the world. Still, he was young and hopeful, and the obvious jealousy of Mizzi was an additional reason for discounting her assertions. "Lies or not," he concluded, "it is too amusing to let slip. Besides, she is such a dear...."

He shook his head sadly at the weakness of human nature, and then an unpleasant thought hit him—the accusation from her mistress. "Lies" had been the accusation—an ugly word—and seemed somewhat believable on the surface. He again went over the arguments for his defense—there was no clear motive for deceit, his lack of value from a blackmailer's point of view, and more—and the strength of those points gave him renewed courage. The strongest argument of all, the memory of Beatrice herself, nearly sealed the deal. Nearly, because he was cautious and had some understanding of the world. Still, he was young and hopeful, and Mizzi's obvious jealousy was another reason to doubt her claims. "Lies or not," he concluded, "it's too entertaining to pass up. Besides, she's such a sweetheart...."

The object of his devoted suspicion returned soon after eleven that night, a little tired, but full of kindliness and mirth. "Oh!" she cried, as she entered the room, "I hope you haven't waited supper for me. If so, you must be ravenous——"

The person he was seriously suspicious of came back shortly after eleven that night, a bit tired but full of warmth and laughter. "Oh!" she exclaimed as she walked into the room, "I hope you didn't wait for dinner because of me. If you did, you must be starving——"

"Of course I waited," said Lionel. "Shall I ring?"

"Of course I waited," Lionel said. "Should I call?"

"But why hasn't Mizzi set supper?" asked Beatrice, pausing in the act of taking off her hat.

"But why hasn't Mizzi set up dinner?" asked Beatrice, stopping as she was taking off her hat.

"I don't know," said Lionel carelessly. "It is true we had a slight difference, but surely——"

"I don’t know," Lionel replied casually. "It's true we had a small disagreement, but surely——"

She caught up his words. "A difference! with my maid!"

She caught his words. "A difference! with my maid!"

Lionel cursed his stupidity in silence. The unlucky words had slipped from his mouth unheeding. He stood dumb.

Lionel silently cursed his own stupidity. The unfortunate words had slipped out of his mouth without him realizing. He stood there, speechless.

"What was the difference about?" asked Beatrice frigidly. "Did you try to kiss her?"

"What was it about?" Beatrice asked coldly. "Did you try to kiss her?"

At this stroke of feminine intuition Lionel felt himself to be in deep waters. He was no lover of lies, and to this peerless creature a lie would be doubly treacherous. On the other hand, something was due to Mizzi: not only had he tried to kiss her—the feat had been successfully accomplished.

At this moment of feminine intuition, Lionel realized he was in over his head. He wasn’t one to lie, and dishonesty would be especially harmful to this extraordinary woman. On the other hand, he owed something to Mizzi: not only had he attempted to kiss her, but he had actually succeeded.

"Do you think," he asked reproachfully, "that the moment your back was turned I could transfer my worship to another?"

"Do you really think," he asked with disappointment, "that the second you turned your back I could just shift my affection to someone else?"

"I think it quite possible," said the lady with a twinkle he did not see.

"I think it's totally possible," said the lady with a twinkle he didn't notice.

"Then, madam," returned Lionel in his best wounded manner, "let me tell you what happened. I rang for tea. Your maid served it with a certain coldness of manner. I asked the reason, and she accused me of folly in being devoted to you. She even hinted that your words were not wholly to be relied on. I at once led her from the room."

"Then, ma'am," Lionel replied in his most hurt tone, "let me tell you what happened. I called for tea. Your maid brought it with a bit of coldness. I asked her why, and she accused me of being foolish for being devoted to you. She even suggested that your words weren't completely trustworthy. I immediately led her out of the room."

"Without a kiss?"

"Without a kiss?"

"I held her at arm's length," said Lionel proudly.

"I held her at arm's length," Lionel said proudly.

Beatrice said "H'm" in a meditative manner, and then, more briskly, "Please ring the bell."

Beatrice said "H'm" thoughtfully, and then, more energetically, "Please ring the bell."

Lionel obeyed, and waited in some distress. Suppose Mizzi were to excuse herself by relating the incident in which he had been a partner! Would he be cast into darkness on the instant? What a Nemesis for how trivial a misdemeanor! He heard the bell ring again, as the impatient Beatrice pressed the electric button, and sweat broke out upon his forehead. A crisis was imminent. Still a third time the relentless tinkle sounded, and he was without plan, excuse, or counterplot. He woke from his anguish to hear the lady speak.

Lionel complied and waited, feeling anxious. What if Mizzi decided to mention that incident he was involved in? Would he be thrown into trouble right away? What a punishment for such a minor mistake! He heard the bell ring again as the impatient Beatrice pressed the button, and sweat began to form on his forehead. A crisis was approaching. The bell rang a third time, and he had no plans, excuses, or strategies ready. He snapped out of his despair to hear the lady speak.

"She must have gone out, I suppose ... but we must make sure ... perhaps ... will you come?"

"She must have gone out, I guess ... but we need to make sure ... maybe ... will you come?"

He followed her, grateful for the respite, and at a loss for the meaning. They went into the hall, and thence to the kitchen. No one was there. In silence they knocked on the bedroom door, but received no answer. Beatrice opened the door and peered within. She switched on the electric light and they advanced. In the center of the floor stood a portmanteau, strapped and labeled. Lionel lifted the label and read the inscription aloud. It was to a warehouse in Camden Town.

He followed her, thankful for the break, and confused about what it all meant. They went into the hall and then to the kitchen. No one was there. Silently, they knocked on the bedroom door but got no response. Beatrice opened the door and looked inside. She turned on the light, and they moved in. In the middle of the floor was a suitcase, strapped and labeled. Lionel picked up the tag and read the writing out loud. It was addressed to a warehouse in Camden Town.

"She has gone!" said the lady in a whisper of tragedy. "She has gone!"

"She's gone!" the lady whispered, filled with sorrow. "She's gone!"

"And a good riddance, too!" returned Lionel with a vast cheerfulness. "But she might at least have laid supper first."

"And good riddance, too!" Lionel said with a big smile. "But she could have at least made dinner first."

"You do not understand," said Beatrice tensely. "This is no ordinary desertion. It means, I fear, that she has joined my enemies."

"You don't understand," Beatrice said tensely. "This isn't just any desertion. I'm afraid it means she's joined my enemies."

Lionel's good breeding was not proof against the suddenness of this. He sat down abruptly on a convenient chair and laughed.

Lionel's good upbringing couldn’t shield him from the shock of this. He suddenly sat down on a nearby chair and laughed.

"No, no!" he cried. "That will not do, madam. That is—forgive me—too crude, unworthy of your talents. Reflect! Your servant runs off in a petulant fit, and lo! you exclaim that she has been suborned by the Ottoman Empire! That is sheer melodrama."

"No, no!" he shouted. "That won't work, ma'am. That's—forgive me—too harsh, not worthy of your skills. Think about it! Your servant leaves in a huff, and suddenly you say she was bribed by the Ottoman Empire! That’s just pure melodrama."

Beatrice gave a smile that was grave and reproachful.

Beatrice gave a smile that was serious and disapproving.

"You forget," she said gently, "that I am an actress."

"You forget," she said softly, "that I'm an actress."

The sweetness of the reproof, the ironical self-criticism, convinced him of her sincerity more than any rhetoric could have done. "I beg your pardon," he said humbly, taking her hand; "tell me more."

The sweetness of the criticism, the ironic self-reflection, made him believe in her sincerity more than any fancy words could have. "I'm sorry," he said humbly, taking her hand; "please tell me more."

"She has deserted me," said Beatrice quietly. "With her I made my one great mistake—natural, but irreparable. I thought her true, and one day, when I was in need of a woman's sympathy and help, I told her all ... all, even to the hiding-place of the treaty. It is too late for regrets or fears. Now we must act."

"She has abandoned me," Beatrice said softly. "With her, I made my one big mistake—natural, but irreversible. I believed she was honest, and one day, when I needed a woman's understanding and support, I revealed everything... everything, even the location of the treaty. It's too late for regrets or worries. Now we have to take action."


CHAPTER VI

THE HISTORY OF HENRY BROWN

Mr. Henry Brown was a man of forty, an age that is supposed to be the prime of life, though most of us would prefer to be ten years younger. At forty one has shed most illusions, but at least there is the consolation of having arrived at a workable philosophy. For some of us this philosophy may mean simple acquiescence; for others an attitude of pleased contemplation, like a yokel smoking his pipe, leaning on the gate of a summer evening. Those of us who are married and without the philosophy of our own are fortunate in having one—if not several—provided by a wife. And her philosophy, grounded on practical common sense rather than a study of the metaphysicians, is of much more value to the world than abstract thought. She is, in short, better adapted for keeping us up to the mark.

Mr. Henry Brown was a forty-year-old man, an age that's considered the prime of life, even though most of us would rather be ten years younger. By forty, most of our illusions are gone, but at least there's the comfort of having found a workable philosophy. For some of us, this philosophy may be about simple acceptance; for others, it's a laid-back attitude, like a country guy smoking his pipe while leaning on the gate on a summer evening. Those of us who are married and lack our own philosophy are lucky to have one—or even several—provided by our wives. Her philosophy, based on practical common sense rather than studying metaphysics, is far more valuable to the world than abstract ideas. In short, she is better suited to keep us on track.

Henry Brown was unlucky enough to be a bachelor. This was through no fault of his own, for as a young man he had dreamed his dreams of a snug little home, a cheerful wife, and chubby children, who were always to remain at an age not exceeding nine. His dreams, with their usual perversity, had not been realized, though on more than one occasion he had made efforts to find his ideal. There had been, for instance, the daughter of a chimney-sweep, a virtuous and charming creature. There had been a policeman's niece, whose boast it was that she could "slip the bracelets"—her own expression—on a refractory subject as quickly as a professional thief-taker. There had been the relict of a fish-and-chips salesman, and quite a number of others, equally alluring and disappointing. In his early youth he had dallied with them all, but he had never got beyond the dallying stage.

Henry Brown was unfortunate enough to be a bachelor. This wasn’t his fault, as he had once dreamed of a cozy little home, a cheerful wife, and chubby kids who would always be nine years old. Unfortunately, his dreams had not come true, even though he had tried more than once to find his ideal partner. For example, there was the daughter of a chimney sweep, a virtuous and charming girl. There had also been a policeman's niece, who proudly claimed she could "slip the bracelets"—her own phrase—on a difficult person just as quickly as a professional thief-taker. Then there was the widow of a fish-and-chips seller, along with many others, all equally tempting yet disappointing. In his younger days, he flirted with them all, but he never got past the flirting stage.

The reason had been always the same. It was not that he had failed to find the ideal: not at all! The quarry of the moment had always seemed the most peerless of her sex—with a mental reservation giving the policeman's niece the pride of place. It was simply because he could not afford to marry. Girls would "walk out" with him with pleasure. They would give him every encouragement until ... until the fatal truth became known. It was not that his immediate supply of cash was pitiable: it was because he had no "prospects." He had no trade, being merely the driver of a cab. Now it is possible for a cab-driver to marry and bring up a family, but it was a perverse fate that all the girls to whom he paid attention looked somewhat higher in life. And Henry Brown was unable to satisfy their aspirations. He was deep in the groove of cab-driving by the time he was twenty-three, and could conceive no other calling at which he might succeed.

The reason had always been the same. It wasn't that he couldn't find the right one—not at all! The girl of the moment always seemed like the best of her kind—with a special place in his heart for the policeman's niece. It was just that he couldn't afford to get married. Girls would happily go out with him. They would encourage him until... until the harsh reality came to light. It wasn't that his cash situation was desperate; it was that he had no "prospects." He didn't have a trade, being just a cab driver. Sure, a cab driver can marry and start a family, but it was bad luck that all the girls he liked aimed a bit higher in life. And Henry Brown couldn't meet their expectations. By the time he was twenty-three, he was firmly stuck in cab driving and couldn't imagine any other job where he might succeed.

Of course he might have tried to win a wife with less social ambition, but he made only one effort in this direction. At twenty-five he fluttered after a lady who seemed a promising helpmeet. She was a milliner's assistant, and swore to wait till Henry Brown had saved enough to start a home. She waited six weeks, and then, in a fit of romance or madness, married a scavenger.

Of course, he could have tried to win a wife with less social ambition, but he made only one attempt in that direction. At twenty-five, he pursued a woman who seemed like a promising partner. She was a milliner's assistant and promised to wait until Henry Brown had saved enough to start a home. She waited six weeks and then, in a moment of romance or craziness, married a garbage collector.

This, in a commercial sense, had been the making of Henry Brown. Soured by his experiences, he had resolved to hold aloof from Woman and devote himself to Thrift. Some men might have taken to drink; but a strain of Scottish or Jewish blood, coupled with a human desire to show the world he could do something, compelled Mr. Brown to save. For something like thirteen years he lived carefully and put money by. Then came a chance legacy of five hundred pounds. With this and his savings he determined to hazard all, cease to be a wage-slave, and start in business as a cab-proprietor on his own account.

This, in a business sense, had made Henry Brown successful. Disillusioned by his experiences, he decided to distance himself from women and focus on saving money. Some men might have turned to alcohol, but a mix of Scottish and Jewish heritage, combined with a personal drive to prove himself, motivated Mr. Brown to save. For about thirteen years, he lived frugally and set money aside. Then he received an unexpected inheritance of five hundred pounds. With this and his savings, he decided to take a risk, stop being a wage-slave, and start his own business as a cab owner.

He had the luck to start just as taxicabs came in, so he had no old stock left on his hands. He bought two taxis at first and learned the business thoroughly, driving one himself for three months to save money and get experience. Gradually he extended his operations, and by the end of four years he had twenty taxicabs under his command. He still lived carefully, though in comfort, and when he arrived at his fortieth year he rubbed his hands. "Well," he said to himself one day, "I've done it. I might begin to think about choosing a wife now." It was significant that he said "choose": in his youth he would have said "seek" or possibly "sue for."

He was lucky to start right when taxicabs became popular, so he didn't have any old vehicles on his hands. He initially bought two taxis and learned the business inside and out by driving one himself for three months to save money and gain experience. Gradually, he expanded his operations, and by the end of four years, he had twenty taxis under his control. He still lived modestly but comfortably, and when he turned forty, he rubbed his hands together. "Well," he said to himself one day, "I've done it. I might want to start thinking about finding a wife now." It was telling that he used the word "choose": in his younger days, he would have said "seek" or possibly "pursue."

Mr. Brown went about the business with a methodical earnestness, buying in the first instance a new lounge suit and an appropriate tie. He also discarded pipes as being vulgar, and took to threepenny cigars instead. Thus habited, if the expression may be allowed, he would take his walks abroad after office hours or on a Sunday afternoon, wondering where and how he should meet his future wife.

Mr. Brown approached the task with a serious focus, first purchasing a new suit and a suitable tie. He also gave up pipes, considering them tacky, and switched to threepenny cigars. Dressed this way, if that’s the right term, he would take his walks in the evenings after work or on Sunday afternoons, pondering where and how he would meet his future wife.

Business, which naturally had tended to harden him, had left, nevertheless, a good deal of shyness untouched. His uneventful bachelor life, too, had done nothing to eradicate this; and it is a painful fact that he had spoken almost to no woman, save his housekeeper or customers, for a dozen years. This may read oddly, but it is not so odd as it looks. A man with little money, his way to make, and a sense of disappointment, is not anxious at first to extend his circle of friends. When he has made some progress, then it will be time enough, or so he thinks. But it is not always time enough, as Henry Brown found to his cost. His few friends were bachelors like himself, and when he began seriously to think of marrying he was puzzled how to set about it. He despised the idea of using a matrimonial agency, and he felt himself too old and respectable to pick up chance acquaintances in the street. But Cupid, who disdains no servitor, however aged, gave him his chance at last, and a better chance than he had any right to expect.

Business, which had naturally toughened him up, still left a lot of his shyness untouched. His uneventful bachelor life hadn't done anything to change that either; it's a sad truth that he had hardly spoken to any women, except for his housekeeper or customers, in over a decade. This might sound strange, but it’s not as unusual as it seems. A man with little money, trying to find his way, and feeling disappointed, isn't really eager to expand his circle of friends. He thinks there will be time for that once he’s gotten further along. But sometimes, that time doesn’t come, as Henry Brown learned the hard way. His few friends were all bachelors like him, and when he started seriously considering marriage, he was unsure of how to proceed. He hated the idea of using a matchmaking service and felt too old and respectable to meet new people randomly in the street. However, Cupid, who doesn’t turn away any suitor, no matter how old, finally gave him his chance, and it was better than he ever expected.

An attractive young woman, apparently foreign but speaking good English, called one day to order a taxi. Mr. Brown, who booked the order himself, was distinctly struck by her appearance. He was not so absurd as to fall in love at first sight—an unusual proceeding, pace the penny-a-liners,—for the cautious routine of years is a fetter not lightly to be broken. But being, so to speak, on the alert for a possible mate, he now took more than a business interest in his customers. He noticed, therefore, that this young woman was certainly pretty, neat and decided, and he put her down as a lady's maid in a "superior" house. He made no advances on this, their first meeting, but he could not help wishing that she would come again soon. "She has a Way with her," mused the cab-proprietor after she had gone, "and I must say I like her; and her dress was nice, though plain. Well, a plain dress doesn't run a husband into debt." He was painfully ignorant.

A attractive young woman, seemingly foreign but speaking good English, called one day to request a taxi. Mr. Brown, who took the order himself, was clearly struck by her looks. He wasn’t so foolish as to fall in love at first sight—an uncommon thing, despite what the tabloids say—because the careful routine of years is a burden not easily broken. But being, so to speak, on the lookout for a potential partner, he now took more than a business interest in his customers. He noticed that this young woman was certainly pretty, neat, and confident, and he assumed she was a lady's maid in a "superior" house. He made no moves during their first meeting, but he couldn't help wishing she would come back soon. "She has a presence," thought the cab owner after she left, "and I have to say I like her; and her dress was nice, though simple. Well, a simple dress doesn’t put a husband in debt." He was painfully unaware.

She came again a fortnight later on a similar errand, and this time Mr. Brown dared to unbend from his official attitude and remark that it was fine weather. The young woman agreed with a charming smile, and Mr. Brown caught himself thinking quite seriously about her more than once during the day. He wondered if he might ask her the next time she came to go for a walk one day. Would it be proper—the Thing? Would she be pleased to look on him as a mature Don Juan, laying snares for her pretty feet? Would it be "rushing it" too much, and would she build extravagant hopes thereon? For Henry Brown was careful and, remembering his early love, did not intend to commit himself until he knew a little more about her. He was most certainly not in love, but he was thinking about it. And when a man of his age and in his position thinks about it, any nice presentable girl who comes his way may safely speculate on a formal proposal, provided sufficient opportunities offer themselves or ... are offered. This may not be romance according to the rules of fiction, but it is life.

She came back two weeks later for a similar reason, and this time Mr. Brown allowed himself to relax from his official demeanor and commented on the nice weather. The young woman smiled charmingly in agreement, and Mr. Brown found himself seriously thinking about her more than once throughout the day. He wondered if he could ask her to go for a walk next time she visited. Would that be appropriate? Would she see him as a sophisticated Don Juan trying to catch her attention? Would it be “too much too soon,” and would she get unrealistic expectations from it? Because Henry Brown was cautious and, remembering his first love, did not want to commit until he knew more about her. He definitely wasn't in love, but he was considering it. And when a man his age and in his position starts to think about it, any nice, presentable girl who crosses his path can reasonably assume a formal proposal might come, as long as the right opportunities arise or are created. This might not be romance by fictional standards, but it’s reality.

However, for three weeks there were no opportunities, and the pretty damsel did not bring her sunshine into the cab-office. This did not plunge Mr. Brown into the depths of despair or anything so foolish. He went about his business as usual, a little distrait it may be, hoping occasionally that he would meet her again, and in idle moments revolving schemes to achieve this end. The difficulty was that he did not know where she lived, for on both occasions the taxi had been ordered to be at a hotel, and had driven once to another hotel and once to a theater. (He had casually questioned his drivers on the subject.) Hence he had nothing to go on, and had to wait on the chances of fortune.

However, for three weeks, there were no chances, and the pretty girl didn’t bring her sunshine into the cab office. This didn’t send Mr. Brown into a deep despair or anything so silly. He went about his business as usual, a bit distracted perhaps, occasionally hoping to run into her again, and in his free time, thinking up plans to make that happen. The problem was he didn’t know where she lived, because on both occasions the taxi had been called to a hotel, and had driven to another hotel once and to a theater another time. (He had casually asked his drivers about it.) So, he had nothing to go on and had to wait for luck to come his way.

But a third meeting came at last, for he had the luck to meet her in a tea-shop. She happened to sit down at the same table, and with a desperate diffidence Mr. Brown recalled himself to her. The young woman was very obliging and perfectly at her ease. Oh, but yes! She remembered him perfectly—his cabs were so much nicer than other people's—and after a becoming hesitation she allowed him to pay for an ice.

But finally, they had a third meeting, because he was lucky enough to run into her at a tea shop. She happened to sit at the same table, and with a nervous shyness, Mr. Brown introduced himself again. The young woman was very nice and totally relaxed. Oh, yes! She remembered him perfectly—his cabs were so much nicer than everyone else's—and after a moment's hesitation, she let him pay for her ice cream.

From that time he was in the toils. In the course of their conversation he ventured to ask where she lived. She did not take any notice of the question, and he was too shy to press her. But on parting, a casual whisper thrilled his receptive ear: "I always promenade on a Sunday. If you really wish, I shall meet you at the steps of the National Gallery at half past two. You are discreet, nicht wahr?" Mr. Brown, who translated the concluding phrase as a term of endearment or at least friendliness, began to feel that life was well worth living. He met her on Sunday, and they had a decorous but wholly satisfying promenade in the park. Tea followed, and he escorted her part of the way home. From that date the Sunday walk became an institution, and even an occasional visit to the theater of an evening was allowed.

From that moment, he was caught up in her charm. During their conversation, he dared to ask where she lived. She ignored the question, and he felt too shy to push for an answer. But as they were parting, a casual whisper made his ears perk up: "I always go for a walk on Sundays. If you really want, I can meet you at the steps of the National Gallery at 2:30. You're discreet, aren't you?" Mr. Brown, who took the last phrase as a term of endearment or at least friendliness, started to feel that life was truly enjoyable. He met her on Sunday, and they had a proper yet completely satisfying walk in the park. They had tea afterward, and he walked her part of the way home. From that day on, their Sunday walks became a tradition, and they even allowed themselves the occasional trip to the theater in the evening.

It would be tedious to follow the affair in detail. Suffice it to say that at the end of three months Henry Brown found himself sincerely in love. He had not made a formal offer as yet, fearing that the lady's heart was not sufficiently intrigué. He was immensely satisfied with the change in his life and new comradeship, which he hoped would develop into something warmer. But, afraid of being too precipitate, he contented himself with making her presents of flowers, chocolates, or an occasional piece of jewelry of the Mizpah type. He trusted that his personality, generous handling of the case, and time ("Giving her rope enough to hang herself" was his well-meant but unfortunate metaphor) would dispose her to favor his suit. The lady appeared perfectly content with the situation; she accepted his gifts with careless thanks and a charming smile, enjoyed the promenades, but was sedulous to keep him away from a definite statement or even a plain-spoken hint of his feelings. Was she a designing creature who wished to get as much as she could from him before saying "No"? Or did a nobler emotion possess her? Was she judiciously probing his character and sounding the depths of her own feelings?

It would be boring to go through the details of the situation. To put it simply, after three months, Henry Brown found himself truly in love. He hadn't made a formal proposal yet, worried that the woman wasn't fully interested. He was really happy with the changes in his life and the new friendship, hoping it would grow into something deeper. However, afraid of moving too quickly, he settled for giving her gifts like flowers, chocolates, or an occasional piece of Mizpah jewelry. He believed that his personality, thoughtful approach, and time ("Giving her enough rope to hang herself" was his well-meaning but unfortunate phrase) would lead her to favor his intentions. The lady seemed perfectly fine with the arrangement; she accepted his gifts with casual thanks and a charming smile, enjoyed the walks, but was careful to keep him from any direct conversation about his feelings. Was she a clever woman trying to get as much as she could from him before saying "No"? Or was she motivated by something more genuine? Was she wisely testing his character and exploring her own emotions?

However this may have been, there is no doubt that both were content with the present. And on a night in June, some three weeks before the events of the last chapter, Henry Brown might have been seen seated opposite his friend in a cheap Soho restaurant. They had just finished supper, and both were smoking. To be honest, Mr. Brown did not altogether approve of the cigarette, but he had never dared to object. "Besides," he thought tolerantly, "these foreigners.... But what I wonder is, when they marry do they take to a pipe? If so, good lord!..." His distress vanished as he looked again upon her: she was too pretty to disapprove of. "A bit of Orl right," he reflected; "if only I dared ask her and she said 'Yes.'"

However this may have been, there’s no doubt that both were happy with the present. One night in June, about three weeks before the events of the last chapter, Henry Brown could be seen sitting across from his friend in a cheap Soho restaurant. They had just finished dinner, and both were smoking. To be honest, Mr. Brown wasn’t really a fan of cigarettes, but he had never dared to say anything. "Besides," he thought tolerantly, "these foreigners... But I wonder, when they get married, do they switch to a pipe? If so, good lord..." His worries faded as he looked at her again; she was too pretty to judge. "A bit of all right," he thought; "if only I had the courage to ask her and she said 'Yes.'"

The time for separation came at last, and Mr. Brown sighed as he helped her put on her coat. On the steps of the restaurant they paused, for it was raining. "You must have a cab," he said decisively; and then, hesitating, "I wish you would let me see you home for once."

The time for saying goodbye finally arrived, and Mr. Brown sighed as he helped her put on her coat. They stopped on the steps of the restaurant because it was raining. "You need to take a cab," he said firmly; then, after a moment, "I wish you'd let me walk you home this time."

She glanced up.

She looked up.

"For this once, just a little way."

"For this one time, just a little way."

Her partial acquiescence surprised him, for hitherto he had never been permitted to escort her home in a cab. As a hansom drove up in answer to the whistle, he wondered if it might be taken as a sign. With bounding pulses he thought, "Shall I risk it and ask her?" And then, with a return of sanity, "No; better wait and not spoil it." He handed her in carefully, stepped in beside her, and asked what address he should give. "Oh, Trafalgar Square," she replied carelessly, "and then St. Paul's if necessary."

Her partial agreement surprised him because up until now, he had never been allowed to take her home in a cab. When a hansom cab pulled up in response to the whistle, he wondered if it could be seen as a sign. With his heart racing, he thought, "Should I take the chance and ask her?" Then, regaining his composure, he decided, "No; it’s better to wait and not ruin this." He helped her into the cab, got in next to her, and asked what address he should give. "Oh, Trafalgar Square," she replied casually, "and then St. Paul's if needed."

He obeyed, wondering what she could mean.

He complied, wondering what she could mean.

The cab had scarcely started before she turned to him and said demurely, "You must think this strange—immodest, almost. But I have a reason. First of all, I wish to thank you for your many kindnesses."

The cab had just started moving when she turned to him and said shyly, "You must think this is odd—almost inappropriate. But I have a reason. First of all, I want to thank you for all your kindnesses."

She paused, and he was understood to murmur, "Not at all. An honor." She continued:

She paused, and he was heard to murmur, "Not at all. It’s an honor." She continued:

"But there is a question I must ask, and I beg a truthful answer. Why have you so befriended a poor and humble girl like myself?"

"But there's a question I need to ask, and I really hope for an honest answer. Why have you become friends with a poor and humble girl like me?"

At this question Henry Brown performed a volte-face. A moment before he had resolved to wait. But being in love, encouraged by an excellent supper and some Chianti, and fired by the graciousness of his divinity, he threw caution to the winds. Though in the privacy of his office he had more than once rehearsed the scene and prepared effective orations, beginning "Miss," "Honored Ma'amselle," and "My dear Miss," he merely said, "Well, it's this way, you see: I love you."

At this question, Henry Brown changed his mind. Just a moment before, he had decided to wait. But being in love, fueled by a great dinner and some Chianti, and inspired by the kindness of his beloved, he let go of his caution. Even though he had practiced the scene alone in his office and prepared some impactful speeches starting with "Miss," "Dear Ma'amselle," and "My dear Miss," he simply said, "Well, it's like this: I love you."

The age of "This is so sudden" has passed away; hence it was not unconventional for the girl to affect no surprise at the announcement. She was conventional enough to turn her head for a moment and appear to be thinking deeply. She also obeyed the rules by observing presently, "But that is foolish." Mr. Brown, his devotion crystallizing into a sensible effort to win her, forgot his shyness and enlarged on the pleasing theme.

The time of "This is so sudden" is over; so it wasn't unusual for the girl to show no surprise at the news. She was conventional enough to turn her head for a moment and look like she was thinking deeply. She also followed the rules by saying, "But that doesn't make sense." Mr. Brown, his devotion solidifying into a genuine attempt to win her over, forgot his shyness and elaborated on the enjoyable topic.

"I beg to differ," he said steadily, though his heart was beating fast and the roof of his mouth was curiously parched. "I don't consider it foolish at all. I have loved you for a goodish time, and I want you to be my wife. I am not a boy, miss, as you know. I'm a serious man of forty, for it's no use trying to hide my age or my seriousness. I have enough to keep us both in comfort, and—and I really love you very much."

"I have to disagree," he said firmly, even though his heart was racing and his mouth felt oddly dry. "I don’t think it’s foolish at all. I’ve loved you for quite a while now, and I want you to be my wife. I’m not a kid, madam, as you well know. I’m a serious man of forty, and there’s no point in pretending about my age or my intentions. I have enough to support both of us comfortably, and—I really love you a lot."

She was looking at him with an expression that was kind and not at all embarrassed.

She was looking at him with a kind expression that wasn’t at all awkward.

"Listen!" she said, more steadily than he. "I thank you very much. I guessed that you liked me, but—but I am not quite sure of you."

"Listen!" she said, more confidently than he did. "Thank you so much. I kind of thought you liked me, but—but I'm not completely sure about you."

"Of me!" he repeated in amazement. "Why, I—I swear that I love you. What are you not sure of? My income? (Excuse me for mentioning it, miss.) You can look at my books if you like. My character? Any of the neighbors would speak for me——"

"Of me!" he exclaimed, astonished. "Well, I—I promise that I love you. What are you unsure about? My income? (Sorry for bringing it up, miss.) You can check my finances if you want. My character? Any of the neighbors would vouch for me——"

She waved her hand impatiently.

She waved her hand impatiently.

"It is not that. Only I am not sure that you love Romance."

"It’s not that. I'm just not sure that you love romance."

He started.

He began.

"Romance! I dunno ..." he said blankly. "What are the symptoms? I know I love you right enough, but Romance...."

"Romance! I don't know..." he said blankly. "What are the signs? I definitely love you, but Romance..."

"Exactly. I do not know. I like you—oh! very much indeed. Sometimes I think I love you, but then a doubt creeps in. Suppose, I say, he has not a soul!"

"Exactly. I don’t know. I really like you—oh! a lot, actually. Sometimes I think I love you, but then doubt sneaks in. What if, I wonder, he doesn’t have a soul!"

"Oh, come!" remonstrated the other. "You ought to know better than that. Why, that's pretty near atheism! I go to church——"

"Oh, come on!" the other replied. "You should know better than that. That’s almost like atheism! I go to church——"

"It is not that kind of soul," she explained. "I mean, a sense of adventure—of excitement—in a word, romance! To marry a man without romance would be insupportable; life would be too dull. If only I could be sure that you had romance, I might...."

"It’s not that kind of soul," she explained. "I mean, a sense of adventure—of excitement—in a word, romance! Marrying a man without romance would be unbearable; life would be too boring. If only I could be sure that you had romance, I might...."

"Try me," said the practical Henry. "I must say, miss, I don't exactly see what you mean. But I'd do anything to please you. Tell me how to set about this romance idea and I'll do my best."

"Go ahead and give it a shot," said the down-to-earth Henry. "I have to admit, miss, I don’t really understand what you’re talking about. But I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make you happy. Just let me know how to approach this romance thing, and I’ll give it my all."

"You mean that?" she asked, her eyes sparkling.

"You really mean that?" she asked, her eyes shining.

"Yes," he replied stoutly. "Anything in reason."

"Yeah," he replied confidently. "Anything reasonable."

"Or unreason? The true romance knows no reason."

"Or is it irrational? True love has no logic."

Mr. Brown, against his better judgment, but compelled by her attractions, said, "It's a bet!"

Mr. Brown, despite knowing better, but drawn in by her charm, said, "It's a deal!"

After this momentous decision there was a silence. The lady sank back in her seat and began to meditate with a pleased smile. Henry Brown, a whirl of conflicting emotions, looked gaily out into the street. It was depressing to the view, wet, dirty and forbidding; but to him it was the antechamber of Paradise. At last he was by way of realizing his ideal: his frequent failures and persistent struggles were presently to be crowned with fulfilment. In a burst of noble emotion he resolved to give the cabman a sovereign. He turned his head once more to look at his charmer and caught sight of a little white hand lying carelessly on the seat. It suggested a happy idea; and with a respectful tenderness he lifted it and pressed it warmly.

After this big decision, there was silence. The lady leaned back in her seat and began to think with a satisfied smile. Henry Brown, filled with mixed emotions, looked cheerfully out into the street. It was dreary to look at, wet, dirty, and uninviting; but to him, it felt like the entrance to Paradise. He was finally about to realize his ideal: his many failures and ongoing struggles were soon to be rewarded. In a rush of noble feeling, he decided to give the cab driver a sovereign. He turned his head again to glance at his charming companion and noticed a small white hand resting carelessly on the seat. It sparked a happy thought; with respectful tenderness, he lifted it and pressed it warmly.

"Oh! you must not!"

"Oh! You can't do that!"

"Beg pardon!" he said, though he was sensible enough not to drop the hand; "it was this romance idea that put it into my head. I hope you don't mind."

"Excuse me!" he said, although he was smart enough not to let go of the hand; "it was this romantic idea that got me thinking. I hope you don't mind."

"But we are not promised!"

"But we're not guaranteed!"

"On Trust, eh?" he said cheerfully. "Well, I suppose I must wait till I can say Paid For. You've been thinking of some scheme to try me, haven't you?"

"On Trust, huh?" he said cheerfully. "Well, I guess I’ll have to wait until I can say Paid For. You’ve been thinking of some plan to test me, haven’t you?"

"The scheme is ready," she replied gravely. "I was wondering whether you are strong enough to obey. It may mean danger...."

"The plan is ready," she said seriously. "I was wondering if you’re strong enough to follow through. It might mean facing danger..."

"Fourteen stone and in fair training," he said complacently.

"Fourteen stone and in decent shape," he said confidently.

"Ridicule...."

"Mockery...."

"I shan't be laughed at more than once."

"I won't be laughed at more than once."

"Perhaps ... prison."

"Maybe ... prison."

"Crumbs!" observed Henry Brown, stiffening. "My dear—beg pardon—miss, I mean. You're not one of them anarchists?"

"Wow!" exclaimed Henry Brown, tensing up. "Excuse me—sorry about that—miss, I mean. You're not one of those anarchists, are you?"

"No. I have done nothing wrong. Only, events might put you in a false position. You might be accused and be obliged to be silent. Would you flinch from prison in a good cause?"

"No. I haven't done anything wrong. It's just that circumstances can put you in a difficult situation. You could be accused and forced to stay quiet. Would you back down from prison for a righteous cause?"

For a disgraceful moment Henry Brown wished to say, "The cause be blowed," but happily his eyes met hers. Innocence, reinforced by pretty features, has an easy prey in besotted experience. She lowered her lashes in virginal confusion and appeal. "I'll do it!" said Henry Brown, setting his teeth. "That is, if you're on the square."

For a shameful moment, Henry Brown wanted to say, "To hell with the cause," but thankfully his eyes connected with hers. Innocence, combined with attractive features, easily captivates someone who's blinded by experience. She lowered her eyelashes in naive confusion and vulnerability. "I'll do it!" said Henry Brown, gritting his teeth. "That is, if you're being honest."

She clapped her hands.

She clapped her hands.

"Oh, thank you! thank you! I promise that I am on the square. Really, I am a victim.... What I want you to do is to become, for a short time, a kind of detective."

"Oh, thank you! Thank you! I promise I’m being honest. Honestly, I’m a victim... What I need you to do is to take on the role of a detective for a little while."

"A detective!"

"A detective!"

"An amateur. If you can leave the guidance of your business to another for a time."

"An amateur. If you can hand over the management of your business to someone else for a while."

Her hand touched his again, possibly by accident.

Her hand accidentally brushed against his again.

"N—yes," he said, determined. "Yes, I mean—yes."

"N—yeah," he said, resolute. "Yeah, I mean—yeah."

"I shall tell you the story another time. For the present I shall say that it has to do with some papers. I may ask you to follow and watch a man. I may ask you to get back for me the documents. I may—I do not know. It may even be necessary for you to leave London for a brief space. For the present we can do nothing, but will you hold yourself in readiness to act at a word—a sign—a telegram from me?"

"I'll share the story another time. For now, I’ll just say it involves some papers. I might ask you to follow and keep an eye on a man. I might need you to retrieve the documents for me. I might—I’m not sure. It might even be necessary for you to leave London for a short while. For now, we can’t do anything, but will you be ready to act at a word—a signal—a text from me?"

Things were developing more rapidly than Henry Brown liked, but he was a man of his word and—she was a delightful creature.

Things were moving faster than Henry Brown preferred, but he was a man of his word and—she was a wonderful person.

"I will."

"I'll."

"Thank you," she breathed, and this time plainly pressed his hand. He seized it and returned the pressure, feeling like a knight of the middle ages. (Or a middle-aged knight?) "And you are content to do this without reasons—explanations?"

"Thank you," she said softly, and this time she clearly squeezed his hand. He took hold of it and squeezed back, feeling like a knight from the Middle Ages. (Or a middle-aged knight?) "And you're okay with doing this without any reasons or explanations?"

"If you'll give me one excuse," he said craftily.

"If you give me just one excuse," he said cleverly.

"Bitte?"

"Excuse me?"

"I don't know what they call it in your language," said Henry, and hesitated. A shred of bashfulness still hung about him, but he was growing up fast—expanding like a flower beneath the sun. "May I explain?" he asked courageously.

“I don’t know what you call it in your language,” Henry said, hesitating. A bit of shyness still lingered around him, but he was maturing quickly—blooming like a flower in the sunlight. “Can I explain?” he asked boldly.

"But certainly!"

"Absolutely!"

So Henry kissed her.

So Henry kissed her.

"For that excuse," he whispered with a new-found eloquence, "I'd do more than you ask."

"For that excuse," he whispered with newfound eloquence, "I'd do more than you ask."

She laughed and imprinted a feather upon his cheek.

She laughed and pressed a feather against his cheek.

"So you have a soul after all!" she said happily. "I congratulate you and ... myself."

"So you do have a soul after all!" she said with a smile. "Congrats to you and ... to me."

The last word was inaudible; indeed it was not meant for the new henchman of Romance.

The last word couldn't be heard; in fact, it wasn't meant for the new sidekick of Romance.


CHAPTER VII

MR. HEDDERWICK'S FIRST ADVENTURE

"Alicia, my dear," said Robert Hedderwick to his wife, as he was smoking after dinner, "shall we talk about our annual holiday?"

"Alicia, my dear," Robert Hedderwick said to his wife while smoking after dinner, "should we talk about our annual vacation?"

His wife, a determined lady of forty-five—six years younger than he,—put down her knitting.

His wife, a determined woman of forty-five—six years younger than him—set down her knitting.

"By all means, Robert, if you wish. But I do not know what there is to discuss. It is not yet July and we never go away till August, so there is plenty of time."

"Sure, Robert, if that's what you want. But I’m not sure what there is to talk about. It's not even July yet, and we never leave until August, so there's plenty of time."

"But why should we not go away in July this year?" he suggested, somewhat diffidently.

"But why shouldn't we go away in July this year?" he suggested, a bit hesitantly.

"Why should we?"

"What's the reason for this?"

"Well ... it would be a change...."

"Well ... it would be a change...."

"A most undesirable and unnecessary change," said his wife decisively, picking up her knitting again. "August is the hottest month, and August in London would be unbearable. Besides, change for the mere sake of change is childish. You might as well suggest our going somewhere else than Cromer."

"A totally unwanted and unnecessary change," his wife said firmly, picking up her knitting again. "August is the hottest month, and August in London would be unbearable. Plus, changing just for the sake of it is immature. You might as well suggest we go somewhere other than Cromer."

"Well ... er ..." said Mr. Hedderwick nervously, "why shouldn't we? Cromer is a charming place—charming; but we have been there twelve years running. Don't you think——"

"Well ... um ..." Mr. Hedderwick said nervously, "why shouldn't we? Cromer is a lovely place—really lovely; but we've been going there for twelve years in a row. Don't you think——"

"Cromer suits my health. And yours," Alicia added after a moment's thought. "And mother would be disappointed if we didn't go. You don't seem to have thought of that."

"Cromer is good for my health. And yours," Alicia added after a moment's thought. "And mom would be disappointed if we didn't go. You don't seem to have considered that."

Her husband opened his mouth to say "I have, my dear," but changed the words to "Oh ... ah ... yes ... of course." Then he got up, walked to the window in rather an aimless fashion, and stared out. Presently he began to whistle.

Her husband opened his mouth to say "I have, my dear," but changed it to "Oh ... ah ... yes ... of course." Then he got up, walked to the window somewhat aimlessly, and stared outside. After a moment, he started to whistle.

"Please do not whistle, Robert," said Alicia reprovingly. "You know I can not endure it."

"Please don't whistle, Robert," Alicia said disapprovingly. "You know I can’t stand it."

"I beg your pardon," said Robert submissively. "I forgot."

"I’m sorry," said Robert humbly. "I forgot."

"You want something to do," observed his wife, as one who gives an order. "You've done nothing but smoke since dinner. Why don't you go and dig in the garden?"

"You need something to keep you busy," his wife pointed out, sounding almost commanding. "You've just been smoking since dinner. Why don't you go work in the garden?"

"I—I don't feel like gardening."

"I'm just not in the mood for gardening."

"Or read. Where is your book that——"

"Or read. Where is your book that——"

"I—I don't feel like reading."

"I'm not in the mood to read."

"The truth is, you don't know what you do want," said Alicia firmly. "You men are just like children when you haven't got a definite task. Until you retired from the business you were always perfectly happy. Now that your days are free you don't know what to do with yourself. Here! come and hold my wool for me!"

"The truth is, you don't know what you do want," Alicia said firmly. "You men are just like kids when you don't have a clear task. You were always perfectly happy until you retired from the business. Now that you have free days, you don’t know what to do with yourself. Here! Come and hold my wool for me!"

She laid her knitting down on the table and picked up a skein of white wool that lay near. Her husband, with a resigned expression, mutely held up his hands. The wool was placed over them, and then, after strict injunctions not to stir, or get tangled, or drop an end, or breathe too audibly, Mrs. Hedderwick began to wind it into a ball.

She put her knitting down on the table and grabbed a skein of white wool that was nearby. Her husband, looking resigned, silently held up his hands. The wool was draped over them, and then, after strict instructions not to move, get tangled, drop an end, or breathe too loudly, Mrs. Hedderwick started to wind it into a ball.

As the uncongenial task went on, Robert reflected disconsolately that his bid for freedom had not met with much success. He had had hopes that this year at least Alicia would have consented to go to some other place for their holiday. He was tired of Cromer and wanted a change. Also, he was not enthusiastic for another holiday spent under the wing of Alicia's mother, Mrs. Ainsley. She was too like her—he checked the heretical thought and substituted "too determined"—to make him anxious to renew her acquaintance more often than he was obliged. "Obliged...." The word buzzed unpleasantly in the brain. His prophetic instinct told him that he would be obliged to yield to Alicia's wishes. If he ventured to suggest once more that Eastbourne or Brighton might be preferable to Cromer, he knew too well what would happen. Alicia would say firmly, "No, Robert; you know We settled on Cromer, and it would be silly to change Our minds now." Supposing he dared greatly and put his foot down; supposing he said, "I will not go there: I will go to Brighton!" what would happen? He knew perfectly well that he would never have the courage to be so rebellious as all that; but he kept playing with the notion as one plays with temptation in daily life. If only he dared! He might say, "I will not, Alicia!" and then bolt from the house. It would be rather fun, an adventure, to run away ... all by himself. By himself! what a holiday that would be! He laughed aloud at the thought.

As the tedious task continued, Robert thought sadly that his attempt to gain freedom hadn’t been very successful. He had hoped that this year Alicia would agree to go somewhere else for their holiday. He was tired of Cromer and wanted a change. Plus, he wasn't looking forward to another holiday spent under the care of Alicia's mother, Mrs. Ainsley. She was too much like her—he stopped that thought and changed it to "too determined"—which didn’t make him eager to see her more often than necessary. "Obliged...." The word buzzed uncomfortably in his mind. His gut feeling warned him that he would have to give in to Alicia's wishes. If he dared to suggest once again that Eastbourne or Brighton might be better than Cromer, he already knew what would happen. Alicia would say stubbornly, "No, Robert; you know we settled on Cromer, and it would be silly to change our minds now." What if he were bold and stood his ground; what if he said, "I will not go there: I will go to Brighton!"? He knew very well he would never have the guts to be that rebellious; but he kept toying with the idea like someone toys with temptation in daily life. If only he dared! He could say, "I will not, Alicia!" and then run out of the house. It would be kind of fun, an adventure, to escape ... all by himself. By himself! What a holiday that would be! He laughed out loud at the thought.

"I see nothing amusing in the wool being tangled," said Alicia's voice reprovingly, and he jumped in alarm.

"I don't find any humor in the wool being tangled," Alicia's voice said disapprovingly, and he jumped in surprise.

"I was not laughing at that, my dear," he said appeasingly. "I was thinking of something else."

"I wasn't laughing at that, my dear," he said soothingly. "I was thinking about something else."

Alicia sniffed, but maintained a fortunate silence. When she finished she said, "I am going out to take the sewing meeting for an hour or so. Will you be in?"

Alicia sniffed but kept quiet. When she was done, she said, "I'm heading out to take the sewing meeting for an hour or so. Will you be around?"

"Yes, my dear," said Robert cheerfully, and a few minutes later he heard the front door close.

"Yeah, my dear," Robert said cheerfully, and a few minutes later he heard the front door shut.

Left to himself, he walked to the window and resumed his idle staring. Remembering that now he was a free agent he began to whistle again, a trifle mournfully, for he was meditating on life. This, for the average man, as a rule, begets melancholy—particularly if it is his own life he reflects on.

Left to himself, he walked to the window and went back to his absent-minded staring. Remembering that he was now a free agent, he started to whistle again, a little sadly, as he was thinking about life. This usually makes the average person feel down, especially when reflecting on their own life.

Robert Hedderwick had been chief cashier in a big store for more than fifteen years. He had earned two hundred and fifty pounds a year (with an occasional bonus) for some time, and on the whole he had enjoyed his work. At least it had always been interesting, and had given him that most necessary of all things—regular and definite occupation. And though at times he used to wish he was a partner or had more prospects, still he had been contented. Then at the age of fifty an uncle had died and left him a handsome competence. Alicia at once had made him forswear the office and set up as a gentleman of leisure. Not that he had been unwilling to obey. At first he had welcomed the relief from thraldom. It was a luxury to be able to lie in bed a little longer, if he wished, without feeling "I must get up now, or I shall miss the eight-fifty." It was a luxury to sit at ease in his strip of garden on a fine morning and read the newspaper. It was not unpleasant to think that his former colleagues were saying, "Lucky chap, Hedderwick!" what time they were under the eyes of their master.

Robert Hedderwick had been the chief cashier at a large store for over fifteen years. He earned two hundred and fifty pounds a year (plus the occasional bonus) for quite some time, and overall, he had enjoyed his job. At least it was always interesting and provided him with that most essential thing—regular and definite work. And while there were times he wished he were a partner or had better prospects, he had been satisfied. Then, at fifty, an uncle passed away and left him a nice inheritance. Alicia immediately had him give up the office and become a gentleman of leisure. Not that he resisted. At first, he welcomed the break from the daily grind. It was a luxury to lie in bed a little longer, if he wanted, without feeling, "I must get up now, or I’ll miss the eight-fifty." It was nice to relax in his small garden on a beautiful morning and read the newspaper. It wasn't bad to think that his former colleagues were saying, "Lucky guy, Hedderwick!" while they were under their boss's watchful eye.

But these and similar luxuries palled after a time, and he began to grow, not exactly discontented, but restless and vaguely unhappy. He had no hobbies, save reading, and none but the ardent student wishes to read throughout the day. He felt himself a little old to begin photography, stamp-collecting or wood-carving; still, recognizing the need of some occupation, he tried to do a little gardening. The strip of land at the back of the house was small, being some thirty yards long by twenty broad. Two-thirds of this was grass, which he mowed conscientiously once a week: the rest was given up to flowers. As Robert knew nothing of flowers, he employed a man to do what was necessary in the way of digging and planting. When the serious business of horticulture was finished he would employ himself in cutting off dying blossoms, uprooting weeds and watering. But the sum total of his labor in the little plot did not amount to more than four or five hours a week.

But these and similar luxuries lost their appeal after a while, and he started to feel not exactly dissatisfied, but restless and vaguely unhappy. He had no hobbies other than reading, and only someone with a deep passion for it would want to read all day long. He thought he might be a bit too old to start photography, stamp-collecting, or wood-carving; however, realizing he needed some kind of activity, he attempted a bit of gardening. The strip of land behind the house was small, about thirty yards long and twenty wide. Two-thirds of it was grass, which he mowed diligently once a week; the rest was dedicated to flowers. Since Robert knew nothing about flowers, he hired someone to handle the necessary digging and planting. Once the serious gardening was done, he kept himself busy trimming dead blossoms, pulling out weeds, and watering. But altogether, his work in the small plot amounted to just four or five hours a week.

His wife was an active—too active for the vicar's wife—supporter of Saint Frideswide's Church, and when her husband became one of the leisured classes she did her utmost to spur him to a like interest. He obeyed passively, became a sidesman, and in due course vicar's warden. He was not, to use the vicar's words, "a keen churchman," being on the whole an optimistic pragmatist rather than a devotee of dogma. But he was a good man, cheerful, kindly, with some harmless vanities. He liked, for example, to take the alms-bag round and lead the procession of collectors. He would complain of the trouble entailed by the organization of the annual treat or the parish tea, but secretly he appreciated the occupation and the importance thereof. These things helped to fill a portion of a vacant existence, but they were not enough. He felt that he was rusting.

His wife was very active—maybe too active for the vicar's wife—supporting Saint Frideswide's Church, and when her husband joined the ranks of the leisure class, she did her best to encourage him to get involved too. He went along with it, became a sidesman, and eventually a vicar’s warden. He wasn’t, in the vicar's words, "a very devoted churchgoer," leaning more toward optimistic pragmatism than strict dogma. But he was a good person, cheerful and kind, with some harmless little quirks. For instance, he enjoyed taking the alms bag around and leading the procession of collectors. He would grumble about the hassle of organizing the annual treat or the parish tea, but deep down he liked the activity and the significance it held. These responsibilities helped fill a part of his otherwise empty life, but they weren’t enough. He felt like he was just going through the motions.

This evening "melancholy marked him for her own." It had been a day more vacant of incident than usual, and he was almost bad-tempered. The thought of the recent defeat by Alicia rankled, and he turned over in his mind schemes by which he could outwit her and procure a holiday in Brighton. "It's all very well," he grumbled to himself, "but I don't see why I should continually knuckle under. I've been too easy-going. It's time things were put on a different footing. I wonder if ..."

This evening, "melancholy claimed him as her own." It had been a day with fewer events than usual, and he was feeling quite irritable. The thought of the recent loss to Alicia bothered him, and he considered ways to outsmart her and manage a getaway to Brighton. "It's easy for them," he muttered to himself, "but I don't see why I should keep just accepting everything. I've been too laid-back. It's time to change the game. I wonder if ..."

He was still wondering when Alicia returned, and the solution of his difficulties was not yet. Alicia, who was in an aggressive good-humor, commented on his dulness. Robert replied in a tone that she characterized as "snappy"; she also made the inevitable suggestion that he had eaten something that disagreed with him.

He was still thinking about when Alicia would come back, and he hadn't solved his problems yet. Alicia, who was in a cheerful but feisty mood, pointed out his dullness. Robert responded in a way she described as “snappy”; she also made the usual suggestion that he had eaten something that didn’t sit well with him.

"Good lord!" said Robert, goaded at last beyond caution and fear. "Who wouldn't be snappy, doing nothing half the day, and the other half doing what he doesn't like? Nothing ever happens here—it's like being a fly buzzing in a tumbler. He can't get out, though he can see all sorts of interesting things through the glass."

"Good grief!" said Robert, finally pushed past caution and fear. "Who wouldn't be irritable, spending half the day doing nothing and the other half doing things they don't want to do? Nothing ever happens here—it's like being a fly buzzing in a jar. You can see all sorts of interesting things through the glass, but you can’t get out."

"You ought to be thankful for your many mercies," said his wife coldly: she knew the treatment for the case. "Instead of grumbling like a child, you had better go to bed. That is, if you have finished supper."

"You should be grateful for your many blessings," his wife said coldly: she knew what to do in this situation. "Instead of whining like a kid, you should just go to bed. That is, if you've finished dinner."

At that moment Mr. Hedderwick had one of the strongest temptations of a blameless life. He yearned for the courage to say, "Oh, damn the supper!" but broke into a perspiration at the mere thought. Instead, he had the grace to be astonished at his mood and weakly answered, "I think I shall, my dear." As he opened the door his helpmeet suggested he should not forget at his private devotions to ask for a contented spirit. Rebellion returned, and he banged the door.

At that moment, Mr. Hedderwick faced one of the biggest temptations of his otherwise good life. He longed for the guts to say, "Oh, forget the dinner!" but just thinking about it made him sweat. Instead, he managed to be surprised by his feelings and weakly replied, "I think I will, my dear." As he opened the door, his partner suggested he shouldn’t forget to pray for a contented spirit during his private moments. Defiance took over again, and he slammed the door.

He soon forgot his troubles in sleep; in fact, he did not even hear his wife come to bed. He slept dreamlessly, despite the suggestion that he had committed an error in diet, until a quarter past one. Then he awoke quite suddenly, with a dim idea that something was happening. He sat up in bed, rubbed his eyes, and listened: no, there seemed to be nothing ... everything was still: only the regular breathing of his wife, fast asleep, was to be heard. "I must have been dreaming," he thought, preparing to lie down again. And then he heard a subdued, but distinct, noise down-stairs.

He soon forgot his troubles in sleep; in fact, he didn’t even hear his wife come to bed. He slept without dreaming, despite the nagging feeling that he had messed up his diet, until a quarter past one. Then he suddenly woke up, with a vague sense that something was going on. He sat up in bed, rubbed his eyes, and listened: no, it seemed like there was nothing ... everything was quiet: only the steady breathing of his wife, fast asleep, could be heard. "I must have been dreaming," he thought, getting ready to lie down again. And then he heard a soft, but clear, noise downstairs.

Robert experienced a chill that crept, via the spine and nape, to his brain. The short hairs on the back of his head felt as if they had begun to bristle. A ghostly cowardice flooded his being, penetrating to the uttermost recesses. "Good lord!" he thought, "it must be a burglar!" His first instinct was to lie down and draw the clothes over his head; his second, to jab his wife sharply in the ribs: company in the imminent peril was his prime necessity. Both these base impulses he controlled. Though elderly, he felt himself still a man; and despite the fact that he had no audience, no public opinion to make heroism easy, he realized that his part must be played alone at all costs.

Robert felt a chill creeping up his spine and neck, reaching his brain. The short hairs on the back of his head seemed to stand on end. A ghostly fear washed over him, penetrating to his deepest being. "Oh my god!" he thought, "it must be a burglar!" His first instinct was to lie down and pull the covers over his head; his second was to jab his wife in the ribs—he needed someone with him in this danger. He restrained both of these cowardly impulses. Even though he was older, he still saw himself as a man; and despite having no one to witness his bravery, he knew he had to play his part alone, no matter what.

As he came to this resolve his natural apprehension subsided: he felt calmer, more collected. Sitting up in bed, he listened with strained ears. For a moment there was silence; then came the quiet but distinct opening of a door below. His misgivings had a solid foundation; and with a dismal determination Robert cautiously got out of bed.

As he reached this decision, his natural anxiety eased: he felt calmer and more focused. Sitting up in bed, he listened intently. There was a brief moment of silence; then he heard the soft but unmistakable sound of a door opening downstairs. His worries were justified; and with a heavy sense of resolve, Robert carefully got out of bed.

Why he did not wake his wife he hardly knew. Perhaps it was chivalry, perhaps a subconscious sense that she might spoil the fun. Yes, that was the odd phrase that formed in his mind once the temporary panic was subdued. With a wry smile—remembering his previous complaints of a vacant life and his thirst for adventures—Robert tiptoed cautiously to the dressing-table. Here he made a swift and partial toilet. He slipped on a pair of trousers, a coat and some boots—for in the midst of his apprehensions he had a foolish idea that the burglar might tread on his toes. Then without noise he opened the top right-hand corner drawer, where he kept his collars and handkerchiefs, and took out a small revolver. As he handled the stock he felt his new manhood glowing like champagne in every artery. Life! He had begun to live.

Why he didn't wake his wife, he had no real idea. Maybe it was out of some sense of chivalry, or perhaps a vague thought that she might ruin the fun. Yes, that was the strange phrase that popped into his head once the momentary panic faded. With a wry smile—recalling his earlier complaints about his dull life and his craving for adventure—Robert quietly tiptoed to the dressing table. There, he quickly got ready. He threw on some trousers, a coat, and boots—because amid his fears, he had a silly thought that the burglar might step on his toes. Then, without making a sound, he opened the top right-hand drawer, where he kept his collars and handkerchiefs, and pulled out a small revolver. As he handled the gun, he felt his newfound masculinity surge through him like champagne in his veins. Life! He was finally beginning to live.

How did it happen that a harmless churchwarden and retired cashier possessed so lethal a weapon? Simply, it was due to a mixture of precaution and romanticism. He had always thought a burglar might come, and deep in his composition lay a vein of adventure. It was fine to have a pistol—a loaded pistol—even though never used. It gave a sense of power and desperation. He sometimes fondled it and dreamed of defending himself against a marauder or a mob. But such demonstrations took place only when his wife was out.

How did it come to be that a harmless churchwarden and retired cashier had such a dangerous weapon? It was simply a mix of caution and a bit of romantic fantasy. He had always thought a burglar could show up, and deep down, he had a streak of adventure. Having a pistol—a loaded pistol—even if he never used it, felt good. It provided a sense of power and urgency. He sometimes played with it and imagined defending himself against an intruder or a crowd. But he only did this when his wife wasn't around.

Robert took the pistol in an unshaking hand and conveyed himself quietly from the room. He was not in the least frightened now; indeed he was beginning to enjoy this new sense of being master of the situation. Quietly he crept down-stairs, as close to the wall as possible to prevent creaking. At the foot of the stairs he stood still and listened.... There was no sound. But from the keyhole of the drawing-room came a little pencil of light. Behind the door was—what? Robert cocked the pistol, opened the door, and with a little gasp of triumph said, "Hands up!"

Robert took the pistol in a steady hand and quietly left the room. He wasn’t scared at all now; in fact, he was starting to enjoy this new feeling of being in control of the situation. He crept down the stairs, staying as close to the wall as possible to avoid making noise. At the bottom of the stairs, he paused and listened.... There was no sound. But from the keyhole of the drawing-room, a small beam of light shone through. What was behind the door? Robert cocked the pistol, opened the door, and with a small gasp of triumph said, "Hands up!"


CHAPTER VIII

A TALE AND ITS CONSEQUENCES

There were two people in the room as Mr. Hedderwick opened the door, a man and a lady. The latter, he noted with amazement, was in evening dress, a light cloak being thrown over it; the former wore the ordinary morning dress of a man about town, neat, though a little shiny, and on his head was a top hat. At Robert's command he turned with a violent start: the lady started, too, but in a moment recovered her composure and laughed. "Good morning," she said cheerfully: "I can't say this is an unexpected pleasure, for that would be only a half-truth. And now, what are you going to do?"

There were two people in the room when Mr. Hedderwick opened the door, a man and a woman. The woman, he noticed with surprise, was dressed for the evening, with a light cloak draped over her outfit; the man was wearing the typical morning attire of a city man, tidy but a bit worn, with a top hat on his head. At Robert's command, he turned with a jolt: the woman was startled too, but quickly regained her composure and laughed. "Good morning," she said cheerfully. "I can't say this is an unexpected pleasure, because that would only be half true. So, what are you going to do?"

Robert, considerably taken aback at the character of his prisoners and his own reception, paused a moment before replying. He was breathing a little noisily from pure excitement, but still he was careful to keep the pistol at a threatening angle.

Robert, noticeably surprised by the nature of his prisoners and his own welcome, hesitated for a moment before responding. He was breathing a bit heavily from sheer excitement, but he made sure to keep the pistol pointed threateningly.

"Well," he said slowly, "in the first place I warn you that I shall shoot if you move——"

"Well," he said slowly, "first of all, I should warn you that I will shoot if you move——"

"Of course," she agreed brightly, "that would be the most sensible thing to do. But we have no intention of being so foolish. It seems that you hold the whip-hand, so—shall we sit down and discuss the situation?"

"Of course," she replied cheerfully, "that would be the most sensible thing to do. But we have no intention of being that foolish. It looks like you have the upper hand, so—should we sit down and talk about the situation?"

"By all means," said Robert, gaping. "You will find that armchair the most comfortable."

"Of course," said Robert, staring in amazement. "You'll find that armchair to be the most comfortable."

She seated herself, and her companion was about to follow suit. But he checked himself, picked up a gaily-colored rug from the sofa, and with a smile said, "There is no need for even a jailer to catch cold." He threw it lightly across to Robert, who caught it with a blush. He wished foolishly he had put on a collar. Then the man sat down and looked at the lady as if waiting for instructions. Robert followed his example, taking care to interpose the table between them in case of a surprise.

She sat down, and her companion was about to do the same. But he stopped himself, grabbed a brightly colored rug from the sofa, and with a smile said, "No need for even a jailer to catch a cold." He tossed it gently over to Robert, who caught it, blushing. He foolishly wished he had worn a collar. Then the man sat down and looked at the woman as if he was waiting for instructions. Robert did the same, making sure to place the table between them in case of a surprise.

"And now," said the lady again, "what are you going to do? Send for a policeman?"

"And now," the lady said again, "what are you going to do? Call the police?"

It was the obvious course, but Robert on a sudden felt that it would be impossible. When he had valiantly left his bed, seized his weapon and prepared to capture a burglar or two, he had in mind merely the vision of an ordinary hooligan. The reality upset him. He needed time to adjust his ideas.

It was the clear choice, but suddenly Robert felt that it would be impossible. When he bravely got out of bed, grabbed his weapon, and got ready to catch a burglar or two, he was only imagining an average troublemaker. The reality troubled him. He needed time to get used to the situation.

"I suppose I must," he said apologetically. "I am exceedingly sorry, but really, you know——"

"I guess I have to," he said, sounding sorry. "I'm really sorry, but honestly, you know——"

"Oh, we quite understand," returned Beatrice (for of course it was she and Lionel) with a frank camaraderie. "It must be a painful position for you as well as for us. But perhaps, before deciding, you would like to hear the reason of our visit?"

"Oh, we totally get it," replied Beatrice (since it was her and Lionel) with genuine friendliness. "It must be a tough situation for you just like it is for us. But maybe, before you make a decision, you’d like to hear why we’re here?"

His eyes brightened; he grasped an idea.

His eyes lit up; he got an idea.

"Excellent!" he said. "I have the satisfaction of having frustrated your design, and honestly I am not in love with the notion of giving you in charge. Besides ..." he hesitated as if ashamed, but decided on candor, "my life is a trifle dull, and if you can tell me a really interesting tale, well ..."

"Awesome!" he said. "I feel great knowing I've messed up your plan, and to be honest, I'm not really keen on turning over control to you. Besides ..." he paused, as if embarrassed, but chose to be honest, "my life is a bit boring, and if you can share a truly interesting story, well ..."

"Sir, you are a sportsman," observed Lionel; and Beatrice added persuasively, "A perfect dear!"

"Sir, you're a sportsman," Lionel noted; and Beatrice chimed in sweetly, "A total sweetheart!"

"Flattery is useless," he replied. "I don't want that. Tell me a good tale, and perhaps ..."

"Flattery is pointless," he responded. "I don't want that. Share a good story with me, and maybe ..."

"I will tell you all," said Beatrice. "If we were captured I had meant to keep silence; but your generous offer compels a change of plan. You shall have a frank truthful——"

"I’ll tell you everything," Beatrice said. "If we were captured, I intended to stay silent; but your generous offer forces me to reconsider. You will get a straightforward, honest——"

"I do not insist on truth," said Robert, stroking his nose, "but it must be interesting." He stopped, aghast at his own depravity. Then he laughed gently. "Morality is hard to achieve at this hour. But come! A good tale!"

"I’m not focused on truth," Robert said, rubbing his nose, "but it has to be interesting." He paused, shocked at his own wrongdoing. Then he chuckled softly. "It’s tough to maintain morality at this hour. But come on! A good story!"

Lionel smiled. He had faith in Beatrice as a story-teller, even if he was a little doubtful of her other qualities. He settled himself on the sofa, prepared not only to hear but criticize. As for Mr. Hedderwick, he was so eager that he laid down the revolver on the table and leaned forward on his elbows. To all appearance he might have been a boy listening to a true yarn of pirates and savages.

Lionel smiled. He trusted Beatrice as a storyteller, even though he had some doubts about her other qualities. He made himself comfortable on the sofa, ready not just to listen but also to critique. As for Mr. Hedderwick, he was so excited that he put the revolver down on the table and leaned forward on his elbows. To anyone watching, he looked like a kid listening to an adventure about pirates and savages.

Beatrice, without effort or hesitation, began to speak. A second Scheherezade, she was fighting for her husband and her own freedom, and everything conspired to lend her aid. She had a thrilling story to tell at first hand; she had the dramatic instinct and an appreciative audience. Not only Mr. Hedderwick but Lionel, too, listened with rapt attention. The tale lived, as told by her, bearing the stamp of truth and humor in every syllable her lips uttered. And Lionel, keeping guard over himself with a loving suspicion, noticed that in no particulars did she depart from the original version. He cursed himself that any shred of doubt could still cling about him. Did any cling? Surely not, and yet.... Pish! it was not merely disloyal—it was ludicrous: the two stories were identical. Had the first been lies she must now have betrayed herself.

Beatrice, without any effort or hesitation, began to speak. A second Scheherezade, she was fighting for her husband and her own freedom, and everything conspired to help her. She had an exciting story to tell from her own perspective; she had a knack for drama and an audience eager to listen. Both Mr. Hedderwick and Lionel were captivated by her tale. The story lived on through her, filled with the essence of truth and humor in every word she spoke. And Lionel, keeping a guard on his feelings with a loving doubt, noticed that she didn’t stray from the original version in any detail. He cursed himself for allowing any trace of doubt to linger. Did any linger? Surely not, and yet... Pish! It was not just disloyal—it was ridiculous: the two stories were the same. If the first had been lies, she would have revealed herself by now.

Not that she told her story in such detail as she had to Lionel: there was not time for that. The précis of her life and adventures lasted no more than half an hour: all that mattered was there, but the smaller details were absent. A touch here, and the kidnaping was painted in a dozen words; a line there, and she had swept them to Constantinople: a paragraph depicted Lukos with a master hand—a few vivid sentences described the flight. Then came the stage, her meeting with Lionel (five pages to the rescue, the taxi deleted altogether, and three lines to the dressing-room), and lastly, the treachery of Mizzi. She brought her story down to the moment of their capture, not forgetting to tell how they had effected their entrance by means of skeleton keys. "And that is all," she said at last, drawing a breath of relief.

Not that she shared her story in as much detail as she had with Lionel; there just wasn’t time for that. The summary of her life and adventures took no more than half an hour: everything important was there, but the smaller details were missing. A touch here, and the kidnapping was covered in a dozen words; a line there, and she had whisked them off to Constantinople; a paragraph vividly portrayed Lukos—a few striking sentences captured the escape. Then came the part about meeting Lionel (five pages for the rescue, completely omitting the taxi, and just three lines for the dressing room), and finally, the betrayal by Mizzi. She wrapped up her story at the moment of their capture, making sure to include how they had gotten in with skeleton keys. "And that’s it," she said at last, letting out a sigh of relief.

"Not quite all," said Mr. Hedderwick with rounded eyes. "Lord! what a tale! what a life! Compared with this ..."—his eyes wandered discontentedly round the room, and he did not finish the sentence. "But go on—go on! Tell me why you hid the papers here."

"Not all of it," said Mr. Hedderwick with wide eyes. "Wow! What a story! What a life! Compared to this ..."—his eyes scanned the room unhappily, and he didn’t finish his thought. "But keep going—keep going! Tell me why you hid the papers here."

"Partly by chance, partly design. I meant to hide them in a stranger's house, thinking they would be safest there. One evening as I walked this way I saw a machine in front of your door. It was a vacuum cleaner! That decided me. It meant that after they had finished there was no likelihood of your carpets being lifted for some time."

"Partly by chance, partly by choice. I intended to hide them in a stranger's house, thinking they’d be safest there. One evening as I walked by, I saw a machine in front of your door. It was a vacuum cleaner! That made up my mind. It meant that after they finished, it was unlikely your carpets would be lifted for a while."

"My carpets!" gasped Robert. "What the——"

"My carpets!" Robert gasped. "What the——"

"Oh, do wait!" said Beatrice pettishly; and he collapsed, as was only fitting. "I came next day and the cleaner had gone. During the morning I made discreet inquiries as to your habits and mode of life. In the evening I hired a cab, drove to Kensington to put any possible trackers off the scent, changed into another cab and drove back here. At seven-thirty I called. You were out, and your wife said you would not be back for at least half an hour. I asked if I might wait, as my business was important. She hesitated, but consented, my sables being a guarantee that I had not come with any designs on your plate.

"Oh, just wait!" Beatrice said irritably; and he gave in, as was only right. "The next day I came by and the cleaner was gone. In the morning, I made some discreet inquiries about your routine and lifestyle. In the evening, I took a cab to Kensington to throw off any potential followers, switched to another cab, and headed back here. At seven-thirty, I called. You were out, and your wife told me you wouldn't be back for at least half an hour. I asked if I could wait since my business was important. She hesitated but agreed, my expensive fur being a sign that I had no intentions on your valuables."

"However, to my disgust she insisted on remaining in the room and discussing trivialities. Of course, as long as she remained I was helpless, and my well-meant hints were disregarded. I was in despair; but presently the cook burst in with a woeful tale of a scorched petticoat, and the situation was saved. Your wife darted out to survey the damage, and the next moment my precious papers were hidden beneath the carpet.

"However, to my dismay, she insisted on staying in the room and talking about trivial matters. Naturally, as long as she was there, I felt powerless, and my well-intentioned hints were ignored. I was desperate; but then, the cook rushed in with a sad story about a burned petticoat, and the situation was saved. Your wife quickly went out to check the damage, and in the next moment, my important papers were hidden under the carpet."

"Mrs. Hedderwick returned within a very few minutes, full of apologies and (I fear) regrets that she had left the room. I did not prolong my visit. On the plea that I could not wait further, and promising to call again, I managed to escape. If you wish for proof, look under the carpet beneath your chair."

"Mrs. Hedderwick came back in just a few minutes, full of apologies and, I’m afraid, regrets about leaving the room. I didn’t stay any longer. I said I couldn’t wait any longer and promised to come back, which helped me get out of there. If you want proof, check under the carpet beneath your chair."

Mr. Hedderwick sprang up like an eager schoolboy. He seized the poker, inserted it under the carpet, and with a crackling wrench prized up a yard or two. With trembling fingers he tore it back still farther, and then his face fell. He stood up, a disappointed man. "There is nothing here," he said accusingly. "This is an anticlimax to a capital tale."

Mr. Hedderwick jumped up like an excited schoolboy. He grabbed the poker, slid it under the carpet, and with a sharp pull lifted up a yard or two. With shaky fingers, he pulled it back even more, and then his expression changed. He stood up, looking disappointed. "There’s nothing here," he said in frustration. "This is such a letdown to a great story."

Lionel did not move, but his face darkened. During the recital he had felt a warm glow of faith pervade his whole being, a glow that was not diminished by the contemplation of Beatrice. By the time she had finished he was a devout adherent, and now the shock of disillusion swung him back once more to the certainty of doubt. He did not speak, but his eyes sought hers in a question he could not put into words. The lady alone seemed unembarrassed. She gave a regretful sigh.

Lionel didn’t move, but his expression turned grim. During the recital, he had felt a warm sense of faith fill him completely, a feeling that wasn’t lessened by thinking about Beatrice. By the time she finished, he was a dedicated believer, and now the shock of disillusionment pulled him back to his old certainty of doubt. He didn’t say anything, but his eyes searched hers, asking a question he couldn't articulate. The lady, however, appeared unfazed. She let out a sigh of regret.

"There is no anticlimax," she said. "Rather it is the thickening of the plot. Of course they have been taken by Mizzi. Has she been there recently—yesterday?"

"There’s no anticlimax," she said. "It’s more like the plot is getting more complex. They've definitely been taken by Mizzi. Has she been there recently—yesterday?"

"Not that I know of," he returned blankly. "It's possible, I suppose ... anyhow, it's not a bad idea for ... for a story, but...."

"Not that I know of," he replied blankly. "It's possible, I guess ... anyway, it's not a bad idea for ... for a story, but...."

"I see you disbelieve still," said Beatrice with a calm disdain. "I had no idea men could be so stupid. I suppose there is nothing for it but to wake Mrs. Hedderwick and ask her."

"I see you still don't believe," Beatrice said with a calm disdain. "I had no idea men could be so dumb. I guess there's nothing to do but wake up Mrs. Hedderwick and ask her."

The churchwarden sat down suddenly, as if his knees had given way. "Wake Mrs. Hedderwick!" he repeated in a ghastly voice: "wake my wife! Oh, no! It is impossible—quite out of the question!"

The churchwarden suddenly sat down, as if his knees had buckled. "Wake Mrs. Hedderwick!" he said in a chilling voice: "wake my wife! Oh, no! That’s impossible—completely out of the question!"

"Not at all. She will know whether any one has called here, and in justice to my veracity you must ask her. I insist! Remember our freedom is at stake."

"Not at all. She will know if anyone has called here, and to be fair to my honesty, you must ask her. I insist! Remember, our freedom is on the line."

Mr. Hedderwick rose, pale but determined.

Mr. Hedderwick stood up, looking pale but resolute.

"I beg your pardon," he said politely. "Will you please go at once? I have not the least intention of prosecuting, and I swear that I believe your story. Only will you please go at once?"

"I’m really sorry," he said politely. "Could you please leave right now? I have no intention of taking legal action, and I truly believe your story. So, could you please leave now?"

Lionel chuckled, amused and grateful.

Lionel laughed, feeling amused and grateful.

"This is hardly fair, sir," he said. "You forget that we want information as to where those papers may have gone. If your wife could tell us whether any one has called and what his or her appearance——"

"This isn't really fair, sir," he said. "You forget that we need to know where those papers might have gone. If your wife could inform us about anyone who's stopped by and what they looked like——"

"No, no!" quavered the unhappy Robert. "I can not consent! You must find out elsewhere. I can not have my wife roused! I—I would not have her here for a thousand pounds!"

"No, no!" trembled the unhappy Robert. "I can’t agree to that! You’ll have to find out somewhere else. I can’t have my wife disturbed! I—I wouldn’t want her here for a thousand pounds!"

"Indeed, Robert!" said a deep voice from the door. The churchwarden leaped round in a trice. He saw his wife, in the majesty of a dressing-gown, a poker in her right hand, standing in the doorway. His bowels turned to water. "Alicia!" he groaned.

"Yeah, Robert!" said a deep voice from the door. The churchwarden quickly turned around. He saw his wife, looking regal in her dressing gown, holding a poker in her right hand, standing in the doorway. He felt weak in the knees. "Alicia!" he groaned.

"Yes," she said with a pleasurable severity. "What does this mean?" Her eye roved austerely and there was a dead silence. Robert was temporarily annihilated, Beatrice serenely impassive, Lionel amusedly dividing his attention between the two ladies. Presently Mrs. Hedderwick's brow cleared, as if a light had dawned upon her. She began to speak again in a voice that was almost cheerful. "I see!" she said: "it is a new idea, Robert. I suppose these are some of your friends, and this is a kind of breakfast party. I am very sorry that you did not give me earlier warning, or I would have had the dining-room ready. My husband," she said, turning confidentially to Beatrice, "is a man, and naturally does not realize that bacon can not be fried in a moment, and that eggs will not cook themselves. Toast, again, needs a little care; and coffee I always say is worthless unless one looks after it one's self."

"Yes," she said with a serious yet enjoyable tone. "What does this mean?" Her gaze scanned the room sternly, and a heavy silence fell. Robert felt completely overwhelmed, Beatrice remained calmly indifferent, and Lionel casually split his attention between the two women. After a moment, Mrs. Hedderwick's expression brightened, as if she had an epiphany. She spoke again, her tone almost cheerful. "I get it!" she said. "This is a new idea, Robert. I guess these are some of your friends, and this is like a breakfast gathering. I'm really sorry you didn't give me a heads-up earlier, or I would have had the dining room set up. My husband," she said, turning to Beatrice confidentially, "is a man and, of course, doesn't understand that bacon can't be fried in an instant, and eggs won't cook themselves. Toast, too, requires some attention; and I always say coffee is useless unless someone keeps an eye on it themselves."

"Alicia!" interposed the miserable Robert, "I do wish you'd be reasonable. For heaven's sake——"

"Alicia!" interrupted the miserable Robert, "I really wish you'd be reasonable. For heaven's sake——"

"Kindly do not swear, Robert," said his wife, turning ferociously on him. "If I have made a mistake, I am sure it was but natural. If this is not a breakfast-party, pray what is it? A man of your age would not indulge in suppers"—she gave the word an emphasis that insinuated Cremorne—"so what can I think? I hear an unusual noise—I come down-stairs and find my husband hobnobbing with a strange gentleman and his ... friend ... whom I have met, but——"

"Please don’t swear, Robert," his wife said, turning on him angrily. "If I made a mistake, it was completely understandable. If this isn’t a breakfast party, then what is it? A man your age wouldn’t be going to suppers"—she stressed the word, implying something scandalous—"so what else am I supposed to think? I hear a strange noise—I come downstairs and find my husband hanging out with a strange guy and his ... friend ... whom I have met, but——"

Lionel rose, but Beatrice was wiser and forestalled him.

Lionel got up, but Beatrice was smarter and stopped him.

"Your surprise and indignation are only natural, Mrs. Hedderwick," she said coolly, "but they will be abated when you learn that our untimely visit is in connection with a police affair."

"Your surprise and anger are totally understandable, Mrs. Hedderwick," she said calmly, "but you'll feel less upset when you find out that our unexpected visit is related to a police matter."

Her instinct was right. Curiosity conquered the churchwarden's wife, where an appeal to pity or kindred emotions would have failed. She relaxed her frigid attitude and said, "Indeed?"

Her instinct was spot on. Curiosity got the better of the churchwarden's wife, where a plea for sympathy or shared feelings would have fallen short. She dropped her cold demeanor and said, "Really?"

"Yes," pursued Beatrice. "I can not tell you all at present, but be assured that if it ever comes into court your evidence will be of value." Mrs. Hedderwick smoothed her dressing-gown and determined to appear in the witness-box in mauve. "Will you just tell us this: did any stranger call here this evening?"

"Yes," continued Beatrice. "I can't tell you everything right now, but I promise that if it ever goes to court, your testimony will matter." Mrs. Hedderwick adjusted her dressing gown and decided she would appear in the witness stand in mauve. "Can you just tell us this: did any stranger come by here this evening?"

"Yes," answered Mrs. Hedderwick, divided between resentment and a thirst for knowledge. "A lady, or at least a female, called and inquired for my husband."

"Yes," Mrs. Hedderwick replied, torn between irritation and curiosity. "A woman, or at least a female, came by and asked for my husband."

"A lady!" ejaculated Mr. Hedderwick. "This promises well——"

"A lady!" exclaimed Mr. Hedderwick. "This looks promising—"

His wife's eye compelled him again to his seat. "I think, Robert, if you evinced less interest in such a subject it would be more seemly. The female in question asked if she might wait, as she wished to beg a subscription for an anti-suffragist league. I am in sympathy with such an object and allowed her to remain. In the course of our conversation she referred to an article on dress in one of the women's papers. I happened to have the journal and offered to fetch it; she agreed, thinking that the plate of a new blouse might suit my style."

His wife’s gaze pulled him back to his seat. “I think, Robert, if you showed less interest in such topics, it would be more appropriate. The woman in question asked if she could wait, as she wanted to ask for contributions to an anti-suffragist league. I support that cause and let her stay. During our conversation, she mentioned an article about fashion in one of the women’s magazines. I happened to have that magazine and offered to get it; she agreed, thinking that the picture of a new blouse might match my style.”

"So you left her alone!" broke in Lionel.

"So you just left her by herself!" interrupted Lionel.

"For a bare two minutes. When I returned she was still there. We discussed the blouse for a while, and presently she said that she must go, but would return later."

"For just two minutes. When I came back, she was still there. We talked about the blouse for a bit, and then she said she had to leave but would come back later."

"Plagiarist!" said Beatrice with a smile. "Did you happen to notice how she was dressed?"

"Plagiarist!" Beatrice said with a smile. "Did you notice how she was dressed?"

"I never notice such things," said Mrs. Hedderwick with dignity. "Dress is not one of my foibles. But after she had gone I picked up a handkerchief which I suppose she had dropped. It was marked——"

"I never notice those kinds of things," said Mrs. Hedderwick with dignity. "Fashion isn't one of my weaknesses. But after she left, I picked up a handkerchief that I guess she had dropped. It was marked——"

"Wait!" said Mr. Hedderwick suddenly. "What is her name?" he asked, turning to Beatrice.

"Wait!" Mr. Hedderwick said abruptly. "What’s her name?" he asked, looking at Beatrice.

"Whose, Robert?" queried his wife.

"Whose is it, Robert?" asked his wife.

"Oh, bother!" he said, irritation lending him courage. "Your maid's."

"Oh, come on!" he said, irritation giving him some bravery. "It's your maid's."

"Mizzi Schmidt."

"Mizzi Schmidt."

"And the initials, Alicia?"

"And the initials, Ali?"

"M. S."

"M.S."

Mr. Hedderwick, his head full of romantic notions of chivalry, forgetting the urgent need of circumspection, rose. He advanced toward Beatrice, raised her hand, and, to the horror of his wife, kissed it solemnly. "I beg your pardon," he said; "there is no anticlimax. Now that you know Mizzi is the thief you will want to be off. Good-by and good luck."

Mr. Hedderwick, filled with romantic ideas of chivalry and forgetting the need to be careful, stood up. He walked over to Beatrice, took her hand, and, to his wife's shock, kissed it seriously. "I’m sorry," he said; "there’s no anticlimax. Now that you know Mizzi is the thief, you’ll want to leave. Goodbye and good luck."

They took him at his word and rose.

They believed him and got up.

"Good-by," said Beatrice in the most ordinary voice. "Thank you so much for your help—and yours, too, Mrs. Hedderwick. So sorry we had to break into your house. Good-by. Now, Mr. Mortimer!"

"Goodbye," Beatrice said in a completely normal tone. "Thank you so much for your help—and you too, Mrs. Hedderwick. I'm really sorry we had to break into your house. Goodbye. Now, Mr. Mortimer!"

"Good-by," said Lionel; "thanks most awfully. I felt you were a sportsman as soon as I saw you."

"Goodbye," said Lionel; "thanks a lot. I knew you were a good sport as soon as I saw you."

They were in the hall by this time, and the magnanimous churchwarden was already opening the door.

They were in the hall now, and the generous churchwarden was already opening the door.

"Not at all," he said. "I've had a most interesting night. I wish you'd let me know the end of the tale some day."

"Not at all," he said. "I had a really interesting night. I hope you’ll tell me how the story ends someday."

"If it is a happy ending, you shall," said Beatrice. She halted a moment, motioned to Lionel to pass out before her, and then turned. "If you see us again, be careful never to recognize or speak to us; it might mean danger—not only to you, but us."

"If it's a happy ending, you will," Beatrice said. She paused for a moment, signaled for Lionel to go ahead of her, and then turned. "If you see us again, be careful not to recognize or talk to us; it could mean danger—not just for you, but for us too."

He smiled but said nothing. Beatrice and Lionel moved away in the light of the early dawn. Mr. Hedderwick closed the door gently and stood deep in thought for a moment. "What an adventure ... what a splendid woman ... what a jolly chap!" his thoughts ran. "How different their life from mine! Here am I, tied to the same holiday year after year ... afraid to call my soul my own ... why, why should I not have a holiday on my own account—a holiday ... by myself for once. Something new ... something out of the common...."

He smiled but didn’t say anything. Beatrice and Lionel walked away in the early morning light. Mr. Hedderwick quietly closed the door and stood deep in thought for a moment. "What an adventure... what an amazing woman... what a fun guy!" his thoughts went. "How different their lives are from mine! Here I am, stuck with the same vacation year after year... too scared to truly be myself... why shouldn’t I take a vacation for once—just for me? Something new... something different..."

"Robert!" said a threatening voice from the drawing-room, and he leaped. "Come in! I have something to say to you!"

"Robert!" a menacing voice called from the living room, and he jumped. "Come in! I need to talk to you!"

The tone told him what the "something" would be. His thoughts raced furiously during the next twenty seconds, but he had wit enough to answer, "Yes, Alicia! Wait till I have locked the door!" Then with a swift but silent movement he slipped on a greatcoat and hat and stealthily opened the door again. He peered out.... Yes, there was hope and an object, for he could see, some hundred and fifty yards away, the figures of Beatrice and her escort. With a gasp Mr. Hedderwick muttered, "I will!" He pulled the door to behind him and set out furtively, but with a resolute swiftness, in pursuit.

The tone made it clear what the "something" was going to be. His mind raced wildly for the next twenty seconds, but he was clever enough to reply, "Yes, Alicia! Just wait until I lock the door!" Then, with a quick but quiet movement, he put on a coat and hat and quietly opened the door again. He looked outside... Yes, there was hope and something to chase after, as he could see, about one hundred and fifty yards away, the silhouettes of Beatrice and her companion. With a gasp, Mr. Hedderwick muttered, "I will!" He closed the door behind him and set off quietly but decisively in pursuit.


CHAPTER IX

ENTER TONY WILD

Tony Wild, whose address was The Albany, and who enjoyed an unearned income of two thousand a year, stood on the steps of the Tivoli Music-Hall at half past ten, smoking. His face, which was passably attractive, had temporarily lost its usual good-humor, and he puffed his cigarette slowly as if it was more of a task than a pleasure. This, indeed, it was; for he had consumed seventeen since getting out of bed at ten o'clock that morning, and he smoked more from habit than anything else. He was a young man of twenty-six who pursued happiness, or rather distraction, on the accepted lines: dinners, dances and the stage formed his daily round, but with the zest of youth or cynicism he constantly searched for new thrills. Experience was his god, and it must be confessed that he had had more than a fair share of sensations. He had been jilted, married (luckily it proved a bigamous union; as his "wife," a Covent Garden chorister, had nothing but her prettiness to recommend her; and Tony had been immensely relieved when her husband reappeared after serving seven years at Portland), made a descent in a submarine, gone up in a balloon, and driven a car in the Gordon-Bennett race. He had flown in an aeroplane once for the sake of a new thrill, but subsequently determined that it would be a pity further to risk two thousand a year. These were but a few of his distractions. The only experience he had never tried was work.

Tony Wild, who lived at The Albany and had an unearned income of two thousand a year, stood on the steps of the Tivoli Music-Hall at 10:30, smoking. His face, which was pretty attractive, looked temporarily devoid of its usual cheerfulness, and he took slow puffs of his cigarette as if it was more of a chore than a pleasure. In fact, it was; he had smoked seventeen since getting out of bed at ten that morning, and he lit up more out of habit than anything else. He was a twenty-six-year-old man who sought happiness, or rather distraction, through the usual avenues: dinners, dances, and the stage filled his daily routine, but with the excitement of youth or cynicism, he was always looking for new thrills. Experience was his religion, and it must be said that he had had more than his fair share of adventures. He had been dumped, married (luckily it turned out to be a bigamous marriage; his "wife," a Covent Garden chorus girl, had little to recommend her beyond her looks, and Tony was immensely relieved when her husband showed up after serving seven years in Portland), gone down in a submarine, flown in a balloon, and raced a car in the Gordon-Bennett race. He had flown in an airplane once just for the thrill of it, but later decided it was a waste to risk his two thousand a year again. These were just a few of his distractions. The only thing he had never done was work.

On the whole, he had enjoyed himself. There were times, of course, when he felt that life was a little empty, a little dull; but on such unfortunate occasions he made haste to bring himself up to the scratch by searching for a fresh adventure. His most desperate expedient up to date had been to enlist, but the discipline and routine of the barracks made even ennui seem desirable, and he bought himself out after twenty-four hours of agony. This evening he was feeling distinctly dull, for the day had been singularly profitless. A solitary breakfast at eleven had been followed by a perfunctory glance over The Daily Mail. Even that stimulating sheet had failed to rouse him, and an afternoon swim at the Bath Club had been terminated by sheer boredom. Dinner at his club had failed to produce any congenial spirits, and in desperation he went to the Tivoli.

Overall, he had a good time. There were moments, of course, when he felt that life was a bit empty, a bit boring; but during those unfortunate times, he quickly sought out a new adventure. His most desperate attempt so far had been to enlist, but the discipline and routine of the barracks made even boredom seem appealing, and he paid to get out after twenty-four hours of agony. This evening, he was feeling quite dull, as the day had been surprisingly unproductive. A lonely breakfast at eleven was followed by a half-hearted glance at The Daily Mail. Even that usually engaging newspaper couldn't stir him, and an afternoon swim at the Bath Club ended in sheer boredom. Dinner at his club didn’t bring any likeminded people, and in frustration, he decided to go to the Tivoli.

A few of the turns he enjoyed in a mild and deprecating fashion, but at ten-thirty he found himself on the steps, bitterly reflecting on the defects of modern civilization.

A few of the things he found amusing in a light and self-critical way, but at ten-thirty he found himself on the steps, resentfully thinking about the flaws of modern society.

"London!" he thought moodily, "a city of six million people, and not a thing for me to do. Shall I go to bed?"

"London!" he thought gloomily, "a city of six million people, and nothing to do. Should I just go to bed?"

It seemed a confession of weakness; besides he was not in the least sleepy. So he discarded the unworthy thought, and set out on an aimless ramble through the streets. There is always something to look at in London, something to interest, even though it be but the policeman directing the traffic; and Tony soon found his languor past and good-humor returning. He liked being among a crowd of people, watching, speculating, enjoying. The Strand was one of his favorite haunts, especially at night when the lamps were lit and the theaters discharging their motley audiences. In Piccadilly Circus at eleven o'clock, Shaftesbury Avenue, Aldwych, or the Strand, a man need never feel bored, though he may feel rebellious.

It felt like admitting weakness; besides, he wasn’t the least bit sleepy. So, he pushed aside that unworthy thought and set off on a pointless stroll through the streets. There’s always something to see in London, something to pique your interest, even if it’s just the policeman managing traffic; and Tony quickly found his tiredness fading and his good mood returning. He enjoyed being in a crowd, watching, guessing, and having fun. The Strand was one of his favorite spots, especially at night when the lights were on and the theaters released their mixed crowds. In Piccadilly Circus at eleven o'clock, Shaftesbury Avenue, Aldwych, or the Strand, a man can never feel bored, though he might feel restless.

Tony walked slowly on, stopping occasionally to observe the people. He looked at his watch presently and found that it was past eleven. "Early yet," he reflected; "what's the use of going home? Shall I try the club or a longer walk? The Embankment ... a nocturne of lamps and water ... and ... yes! that would be a new game! Forward!"

Tony walked on slowly, stopping now and then to watch the people. He looked at his watch and saw that it was past eleven. "Too early," he thought; "what's the point of going home? Should I check out the club or take a longer walk? The Embankment ... a night scene of lights and water ... and ... yes! that would be something new! Let's go!"

He turned down to the right and soon found himself by the Thames. Here he proceeded to practise the new game which had just occurred to his active brain. It was simple, if ghoulish, for he merely did his best to imitate a would-be suicide. Turning up his collar and setting his hat a little on the back of his head, he plunged his hands deep into his pockets and assumed an expression of despair. Then he walked slowly along, at times glancing at the river and ostentatiously avoiding the eyes of chance policemen. Presently he stopped, leaned both his elbows on the parapet, and stared gloomily at the Thames. His maneuvers were crowned with success, for a constable soon approached and told him in a kindly tone to move on. Tony replied in a sepulchral voice, and in a few moments was deep in conversation with his preserver. A fictitious tale of cards and drink exercised the powers of his imagination pleasantly enough for ten minutes or so, and when they separated it was with a mutual glow of satisfaction. The policeman thought he had saved a brother, Tony had enjoyed himself for a brief space. It did not occur to him that critics might consider his game morbid or in bad taste. Had he been questioned he would have said, "No doubt you're right, but I was frightfully bored."

He turned right and soon found himself by the Thames. Here, he decided to practice the new game that had just popped into his active mind. It was simple, if a bit dark, as he merely tried to act like a would-be suicide. Pulling up his collar and tilting his hat slightly back, he shoved his hands deep into his pockets and put on an expression of despair. Then he walked slowly along, occasionally glancing at the river and deliberately avoiding the gazes of passing policemen. Eventually, he stopped, leaned both elbows on the railing, and stared gloomily at the Thames. His antics were successful because a constable soon came over and kindly told him to move along. Tony responded in a mournful voice, and in a few moments, he was deep in conversation with his rescuer. He spun a fictional tale of cards and drinking that entertained his imagination for about ten minutes, and when they parted ways, it was with a mutual feeling of satisfaction. The policeman thought he had saved a fellow human, while Tony had enjoyed himself for a moment. It didn’t cross his mind that others might think his game was morbid or in poor taste. If someone had asked him, he would have said, "No doubt you're right, but I was incredibly bored."

After this episode he walked across Waterloo Bridge to enjoy the view, and then returned leisurely to Piccadilly. He was not in the least sleepy, so he determined to extend his walk indefinitely. "The great charm," he reflected, "of being a bachelor with plenty of money is that one can do exactly what one likes without being questioned. If I return at six o'clock in the morning, Pettigrew will admit me without a murmur and ask if I want breakfast. Now, if I had a wife, it is possible that she would take no interest in my midnight ramble.—No! she would take too much interest and fear the worst.... Well, where shall I go? I feel in excellent trim.... Shall I walk to Bolders Green—Whitechapel—the Elephant and Castle? Strange names beckon me.... I remember reading of Hackney Marshes as a little boy ... shall I go and see if there are any marshes? Or shall I make for St. John's Wood and see what Lord's looks like in moonlight, where

After this episode, he strolled across Waterloo Bridge to enjoy the view and then casually headed back to Piccadilly. He wasn't the least bit sleepy, so he decided to extend his walk as long as he wanted. "The great appeal," he thought, "of being a bachelor with plenty of money is that you can do whatever you want without being questioned. If I come back at six in the morning, Pettigrew will let me in without a word and ask if I want breakfast. Now, if I had a wife, she might not care about my late-night walk—no! She would care too much and probably worry..." Well, where should I go? I feel great... Should I walk to Bolders Green—Whitechapel—the Elephant and Castle? Strange names call to me... I remember reading about Hackney Marshes when I was a kid... should I go check to see if there are any marshes? Or should I head to St. John's Wood and see what Lord's looks like by moonlight, where

A ghostly batsman plays to the bowling of a ghost,
A ghostly batsman faces the bowling of a ghost,
And I look through my tears on a soundless clapping host,
And I see through my tears a silent crowd applauding,
As the run-stealers flicker to and fro?
As the run-stealers dart back and forth?

Yes; let's try Lord's!"

"Yes; let's try Lord's!"

We need not follow Tony in his walk. It is enough to say that at four o'clock he found himself, still wakeful, in Covent Garden, watching the market-men at work. After enjoying the sight he wandered idly up to Oxford Street, and presently the Euston Road. He walked down this till he reached Euston railway station, and here he paused to enjoy the freshness of the morning and the quiet of the streets. "Gad!" he thought, "what a shame to lie in bed till ten o'clock. Why haven't I tried this jape sooner? This is the sort of time when one thinks of the country and hates London. If only there was a train here I'd go away for a day or two and try it." An idea struck him and he smiled. "Well, here is a station. It might be amusing to go and see if there is a train starting for anywhere. I think I will. I'll make a vow to take a ticket by the first train available and get out wherever the country looks interesting. That at any rate will be something new."

We don't need to follow Tony on his walk. It's enough to say that at four o'clock, he found himself, still wide awake, in Covent Garden, watching the market vendors at work. After enjoying the scene, he casually wandered up to Oxford Street, and then to Euston Road. He walked down this until he reached Euston railway station, where he paused to enjoy the fresh morning air and the quiet streets. "Wow!" he thought, "what a shame to sleep in until ten o'clock. Why haven’t I tried this sooner? This is exactly the time when people think of the countryside and dislike London. If only there was a train here, I'd escape for a day or two and give it a shot." An idea popped into his head, and he smiled. "Well, here’s a station. It might be fun to see if there’s a train leaving for anywhere. I think I will. I’ll promise to buy a ticket on the first train available and get off wherever the countryside looks appealing. That would at least be something new."

He entered Euston station at a quarter to five. A sleepy ticket-clerk told him that the first train went at five-seven, and asked whither he meant to travel. "Oh, give me a ticket that costs five shillings," said Tony: "I don't much care. No, dear fellow, I'm not mad, and I've not been drinking. A five-bob ticket, please."

He walked into Euston station at 4:45. A drowsy ticket clerk told him that the first train left at 5:07 and asked where he was headed. "Just give me a ticket that costs five shillings," Tony said. "I don't really mind. No, my friend, I'm not crazy, and I haven't been drinking. A five-bob ticket, please."

The clerk complied with an ill-used air. Tony received his ticket and went to find the train. As he laid his hand on the door of a first-class compartment it occurred to him to look at the ticket. It was a third-class. Instead of being annoyed, Tony laughed. "A night of thrills!" he murmured:

The clerk complied with a disgruntled expression. Tony got his ticket and went to locate the train. As he placed his hand on the door of a first-class compartment, it dawned on him to check the ticket. It was a third-class. Instead of getting upset, Tony laughed. "A night of excitement!" he whispered.

"I haven't traveled third for years. Is there any chance of my having fellow travelers? I should doubt it."

"I haven't traveled in third class for years. Is there any chance I'll have fellow travelers? I doubt it."

There were some ten minutes before the train was due to start, and Tony occupied the time in looking out of the window. There was not much to engage his attention, save a few porters handling newspapers and other parcels, but presently a man appeared making for the train. Tony glanced at him with a languid curiosity. The newcomer was dressed in a correct morning suit and silk hat. He also carried gloves and a stick. But though he looked like a gentleman and carried himself with an air, Tony's eye detected signs of poverty. The coat was shiny, and the hat, though carefully brushed, had little luster. "What the deuce is he doing here at this time, and in such clothes?" thought Tony. Then he burst into a noiseless laugh. "The pot and kettle!" he reflected, chuckling: "I had forgotten that I am still in evening dress!"

There were about ten minutes until the train was set to leave, and Tony spent the time looking out the window. There wasn't much to catch his attention, just a few porters dealing with newspapers and other packages, but then a man walked up towards the train. Tony looked at him with mild curiosity. The newcomer was dressed in a proper morning suit and a silk hat. He also had gloves and a cane. But even though he looked like a gentleman and carried himself with confidence, Tony noticed signs of struggle. The coat was shiny, and the hat, while neatly brushed, lacked shine. "What on earth is he doing here at this hour, dressed like that?" Tony thought. Then he silently laughed. "The pot and the kettle!" he mused, chuckling: "I completely forgot I'm still in evening wear!"

He sank back in the seat to laugh at himself more thoroughly, and the man in the silk hat passed by the window. He made his way into the next compartment, and unfortunately there was no corridor. Tony was debating whether or not it was worth while to get out and join the stranger on the off chance of learning something new, when the whistle went. But before the train had begun to move, a face appeared at the opposite window. A man was climbing up the footboard from the line. The next moment the door was opened, the man entered, shut the door behind him and sat down. He was a man of some fifty years, dressed rather oddly. His bowler hat and overcoat were good, but he wore no collar. Tony looked at him contentedly; after all, this walk was producing experiences.

He leaned back in his seat to have a good laugh at himself when the man in the silk hat walked past the window. The man headed into the next compartment, and unfortunately, there was no corridor. Tony was trying to decide if it was worth getting up to join the stranger, hoping to learn something new, when the whistle blew. But before the train started moving, a face appeared at the opposite window. A man was climbing up the footboard from the platform. Moments later, the door opened, the man stepped inside, shut the door behind him, and sat down. He was around fifty years old and dressed rather strangely. His bowler hat and overcoat were nice, but he wasn't wearing a collar. Tony looked at him with satisfaction; after all, this journey was offering some interesting experiences.

"Good morning," he said mildly: "do you usually enter a train on the off side? I ask merely from vulgar curiosity."

"Good morning," he said casually. "Do you usually get on a train from the other side? I'm just curious."

The man laughed, panting a little from his exertions. He did not look like a criminal; indeed he appeared distinctly meek. He seemed happy, too.

The man laughed, breathing a bit heavily from his efforts. He didn’t look like a criminal; in fact, he seemed quite harmless. He also looked happy.

"No," he replied. "This is the first time in my life. I am going on a holiday. May I in return ask you if you usually travel in evening dress in the morning?"

"No," he said. "This is the first time in my life. I'm going on vacation. Can I ask you if you usually travel in evening wear in the morning?"

Tony smiled.

Tony grinned.

"No; I too am going on a holiday."

"No, I'm also going on vacation."

"To Shereling?" asked the man amiably.

"To Shereling?" the man asked with a friendly tone.

"I don't know."

"I have no idea."

"You don't know."

"You have no idea."

"No; I was dull. So I took the five-shilling ticket and the first train. I have no notion where I shall get out."

"No; I was bored. So I took the five-shilling ticket and the first train. I have no idea where I’ll get off."

"What a splendid idea!" cried the other enthusiastically, much to Tony's astonishment. "Most of us are so bound by convention that we plot and plan for weeks: often we even go where we don't want to."

"What a great idea!" exclaimed the other enthusiastically, much to Tony's surprise. "Most of us are so tied down by convention that we scheme and plan for weeks: often we even go where we don’t want to."

"Why?"

"Why?"

The other hesitated.

The other person hesitated.

"Domestic pressure," he said with a smile. "You seem an understanding sort of chap, so I don't mind telling you that. This year—last night, to be candid—I resolved to burst my shackles for a time. Certain ... events ... hastened my decision. I am going to Shereling. I left in rather a hurry—you see I have no collar. I suppose I shall have to wait till we get to Shereling now before I can buy one."

"Domestic pressure," he said with a smile. "You seem like a pretty understanding guy, so I don't mind sharing that. This year—actually, last night—I decided to break free for a bit. Certain ... events ... pushed me to make that choice. I’m heading to Shereling. I left in kind of a rush—you see, I’m not wearing a collar. I guess I’ll have to wait until we get to Shereling before I can buy one."

"There's no hosiery department on the train," said Tony: "railway companies are very unimaginative. If there were, I'd buy a decent suit to travel in. Do tell me why you came in in that unconventional way."

"There's no hosiery department on the train," Tony said. "Railway companies are really dull. If there were, I’d buy a nice suit to travel in. Please tell me why you came in that unconventional way."

"Sorry," said the man, "but I can't do that. It's all right, you know: I have a ticket."

"Sorry," said the man, "but I can't do that. It's fine, you know: I have a ticket."

"Of course," agreed Tony politely, and relapsed into musing. Here was a perfect windfall with enormous possibilities. Decidedly he must not lose sight of his new companion; he would get out at Shereling, too. Tony studied him from half-shut eyes: he looked a decent little chap—almost jolly ... rather like a schoolboy off for a holiday, expecting some excellent pleasure and glorying in the prospect. Also, he was mysterious and secretive, though to outward appearance he was a prosperous business man in a small way—a head clerk or under-manager perhaps. There was something in his face, too, an innocent zest, that appealed to the blasé young man. "Yes, old cock," thought Tony, "I must freeze on to you, whether you like it or not."

"Of course," Tony agreed politely, then fell back into thought. This was a perfect opportunity with huge potential. He definitely couldn't lose track of his new companion; he would also get off at Shereling. Tony watched him through half-closed eyes: he seemed like a decent guy—almost cheerful... a bit like a schoolboy heading off for a break, excited about the fun ahead. He also had a mysterious, secretive side, even though he appeared to be a successful small business guy—maybe a head clerk or an assistant manager. There was something in his face, too, a childlike enthusiasm that caught the eye of the jaded young man. "Yeah, mate," Tony thought, "I have to stick with you, whether you like it or not."

After a silence the old cock began to crow, and soon there was a brisk conversation in progress. They talked chiefly of trivial things, but held each other's interest nevertheless. Tony's outlook and the newcomer's were wide asunder, as also were their experiences. It was the elder man who asked most of the questions, the younger who was responsible for the answers. But they found a bond of union in a Pepysian interest in the novel and unusual, though each approached it from a different standpoint. Tony was a master of external knowledge and sought for something fresh; the other, a babe, welcomed the stalest facts as discoveries from a new world.

After a moment of silence, the old rooster started to crow, and soon a lively conversation began. They mainly talked about insignificant things, but managed to keep each other engaged. Tony's perspective and the newcomer’s were completely different, as were their life experiences. The older man asked most of the questions, while the younger one provided the answers. However, they found common ground in a shared interest in the novel and the unusual, even though each came at it from a different angle. Tony was knowledgeable about the outside world and was looking for something new; the other, inexperienced, viewed even the most mundane facts as fresh discoveries from a different realm.

"I wish," he said, and with a sigh, "that we were going to travel together for a while." Tony's heart leaped. "You are an interesting young man ... but no! that is impossible—it would never do."

"I wish," he said with a sigh, "that we could travel together for a bit." Tony's heart raced. "You're an interesting young man ... but no! That's not possible—it wouldn't work."

Tony did not reply. He felt sure that the fish was almost hooked, but he did not wish to spoil things by seeming too eager. But he resolved that ere the journey came to an end he would land his fish and spend a few days in his company. He did not think there would be a slackening of the interest: if there were, why, he could easily go back to town. Meanwhile——

Tony didn't respond. He was confident that the fish was nearly hooked, but he didn't want to ruin the moment by appearing too desperate. However, he decided that by the end of the trip, he would catch his fish and spend a few days with it. He didn’t think the excitement would fade: if it did, he could just head back to the city. Meanwhile——

The train pulled up.

The train arrived.

"Hallo!" said the elderly man. "This train is billed as a non-stop to Shereling. Why on earth——"

"Hello!" said the elderly man. "This train is advertised as a non-stop to Shereling. Why on earth——"

He leaned out of the window and beckoned the guard.

He leaned out of the window and waved to the guard.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"The strike," the guard answered. "You see, sir, there are ten or fifteen thousand men on strike here just now, and it seems they've got a little out of 'and."

"The strike," the guard replied. "You see, sir, there are about ten or fifteen thousand men on strike here right now, and it seems they've gotten a bit out of control."

"But what," asked Tony's companion, effectually filling the window,—"what has that to do with the trains? Why——"

"But what," asked Tony's companion, effectively blocking the window, "what does that have to do with the trains? Why—"

"You see, sir," continued the guard with an apologetic air, "they've got a bit out of 'and. I don't know the rights of it—they do say they're underpaid, though the employers say they spend their wages on whippet-racing. Anyway, they're out——"

"You see, sir," the guard said apologetically, "things have gotten a bit out of control. I don't know the details—they say they're underpaid, but the employers claim they just blow their wages on whippet racing. Anyway, they're out——"

"But the railway, man. What——"

"But the railway, man. What——"

The guard coughed.

The guard cleared his throat.

"Some of them's a bit 'asty, sir, likewise uncontrollable. It seems that they broke into the publics about midnight and 'ave been making a night of it, so to speak. They've sent for the soldiers, but they 'aven't arrived yet. And they've tore up some of the track. The breakdown gang is repairing it, but it will be an hour or so before we can get on."

"Some of them are a bit rowdy, sir, and pretty out of control. It looks like they broke into the public area around midnight and have been partying since then. They've called for the soldiers, but they haven't arrived yet. And they've damaged some of the track. The repair crew is fixing it, but it will take an hour or so before we can move on."

"D'you hear that?"

"Did you hear that?"

"Rather," said Tony, getting up. "Let's go and have a look. I've never seen a raging mob."

"Actually," said Tony, standing up. "Let’s go check it out. I've never seen an angry crowd before."

"Better not, sir," advised the guard. "The town's not safe."

"Maybe you shouldn't, sir," the guard advised. "The town isn't safe."

"They may listen to me," said Tony with simple grandeur. He turned to his companion. "Do you feel like playing with fire?"

"They might actually listen to me," Tony said with a touch of confidence. He turned to his friend. "Are you up for playing with fire?"

The little man's eyes sparkled and he breathed quickly. He hesitated a moment with natural caution. Then——

The little man's eyes shone bright, and he breathed rapidly. He paused for a moment with instinctive caution. Then——

"Yes," he said briefly. "Dash it! I—I feel as if I were beginning to live!"

"Yeah," he said shortly. "Damn it! I—I feel like I’m starting to really live!"

Tony laughed and opened the door. The guard sighed.

Tony laughed and opened the door. The guard let out a sigh.

"Well, gentlemen," he said, "don't say I didn't warn you. Anyhow, I'd advise you to leave your money behind and your watches, too."

"Well, guys," he said, "don’t say I didn’t warn you. Anyway, I’d suggest you leave your money and your watches behind, too."

"The man's a perfect Solon," said Tony, feeling in his trousers pocket. "Here, guard, seven pounds three ... and a watch. If I perish, you may keep them, but remember that the watch needs winding night and morning."

"The guy's a total genius," said Tony, feeling in his pants pocket. "Here, officer, seven pounds three ... and a watch. If I don't make it, you can keep them, but just remember that the watch needs to be wound morning and night."

The guard gazed dumbly at the evening dress. Then he turned to the other man, "You anything, sir?"

The guard stared blankly at the evening dress. Then he turned to the other man, "You need anything, sir?"

"N—nothing that matters," was the confused reply. "Come on! let's make a move!"

"N—nothing that matters," was the confused response. "Come on! Let's get going!"

"Broke!" thought Tony. "But he hasn't tried to touch me yet. What a day out!"

"Broke!" thought Tony. "But he hasn't tried to mess with me yet. What a day out!"


CHAPTER X

HOW TO DRESS ON NOTHING A YEAR

The two men left the station and began to walk sharply toward the town, which was close at hand. The first street they entered was deserted, but evidence of the strike lay open to the shamed sky. Lamps, it is true, still stood erect, but their glass was shattered; missiles and rubbish littered the roadway, shop-windows had not a pane left whole, and here and there makeshift screens of boards replaced or protected the windows. It was a scene of ruin, complete and piteous. The most curious feature was that not a soul was in the street: everything was still and lonely.

The two men left the station and started walking briskly toward the nearby town. The first street they entered was empty, but signs of the strike were exposed to the ashamed sky. The lamps were still standing, but their glass was broken; debris and trash covered the road, shop windows were completely shattered, and here and there, makeshift boards replaced or shielded the windows. It was a scene of total destruction and despair. The strangest part was that not a single person was on the street: everything was silent and lonely.

In the next street a similar spectacle met them—ruin and solitude. In a third, the same. In a fourth, the same. It was as if a battle had taken place, or rather as if the town had been sacked and cleared by an invading army, which had passed on like a destroying angel, leaving signs of its progress, and signs alone.

In the next street, they encountered a similar scene—destruction and emptiness. In a third street, it was the same. In a fourth, the same again. It felt like a battle had happened, or more accurately, like the town had been looted and abandoned by an invading force, which had moved on like a ruthless angel, leaving behind only evidence of its destruction.

"This is deuced odd," was Tony's comment—"deuced odd. The ruin does not surprise, for everything is possible in this age of Socialism. But is the spirit of curiosity dead? If so, that will be 'the end of all things.' Surely everybody can not be murdered or afraid to come out. Surely we shall light upon at least one brand from the burning—some pathetic, interesting, interested spectator. If it were but a man drunk in the gutter...."

"This is really strange," Tony said—"really strange. The destruction doesn’t surprise me, since anything can happen in this age of Socialism. But is everyone’s curiosity dead? If that’s the case, that will be 'the end of all things.' Surely not everyone can be either killed or too scared to come out. There must be at least one person left among the chaos—some sad, interesting, engaged bystander. If only it were a guy passed out in the street...."

"Yes, it's rum," agreed his companion. "But listen! I think I hear a noise over there to the right. Shall we go and see?"

"Yeah, it’s rum," his friend replied. "But wait! I think I hear something over there to the right. Should we go check it out?"

Tony stopped, friendliness in his heart.

Tony paused, feeling friendly.

"I think you're right," he said. "But look here! Judging by what we've seen, these chaps won't stick at trifles. Personally I don't much care what happens, so long as I can get interested; but you're different—you're an older man. Hadn't you better try the station?"

"I think you’re right," he said. "But listen! From what we've seen, these guys won't hesitate to go all out. Personally, I don't really care what happens as long as I can stay engaged; but you’re different—you’re older. Shouldn't you try the station?"

The little man blushed.

The short man blushed.

"Damn it, sir!" he began, and then stopped. "I beg your pardon—I haven't sworn these twenty years, but I feel somehow different to-day. What I mean is that I'm not a graybeard yet, and if you can be interested, I can. Come on!"

"Damn it, sir!" he started, then paused. "I’m sorry—I haven't sworn in twenty years, but I feel a bit different today. What I mean is that I'm not old yet, and if you’re interested, I can be. Come on!"

"All right," said Tony, warming to him. "Awfully sorry I said that. I say, you are a sportsman——"

"All right," said Tony, getting more into the conversation. "I'm really sorry I said that. I mean, you are a sportsman——"

The other blushed again, but this time with pleasure. "Thank you. That is the second time I have been called a sportsman within twenty-four hours. I ... I rather like it, Mr.——. By the way, have you any objection to telling me your name?"

The other person blushed again, but this time it was out of pleasure. "Thank you. That's the second time I've been called a sportsman in the last twenty-four hours. I ... I kind of like it, Mr.——. By the way, do you mind telling me your name?"

"Not a bit, if you'll tell me yours."

"Not at all, if you share yours."

The little man considered a moment, and then——

The little man thought for a moment, and then——

"My name is Hedderwick," he said frankly. "I feel I can trust you to keep your own counsel."

"My name is Hedderwick," he said openly. "I believe I can trust you to keep this to yourself."

"Of course. Mine is Tony Wild."

"Of course. My name is Tony Wild."

They had been walking quickly in the direction of the noise, which every minute became clearer. At last, guided by their ears, they entered a street where their curiosity was satisfied. At the farther end was a seething crowd of men, a few women, and a rabble of gutter children. They were the strikers, or some of them, all excited and not a few drunk. As the guard had said, they were evidently somewhat out of hand, and the looting of the public-houses had not tended to assuage their wrath. Fired by their alleged grievances, liquor, eloquence and the electricity of a mob, they had spent the last few hours in wrecking the town. The police had done all that was possible to stem the attack and vindicate law and order, but they were hopelessly outnumbered. Reinforcements and soldiers had been telegraphed for, and were even now marching, but for the time being the local forces had retired to talk over the return match and exchange of lint and arnica. The strikers were in possession and thoroughly enjoying themselves.

They had been walking quickly toward the noise, which became clearer with every passing minute. Finally, following the sound, they entered a street where their curiosity was satisfied. At the far end was a chaotic crowd of men, a few women, and a cluster of street kids. They were the strikers, or at least some of them, all hyped up and quite a few drunk. As the guard had mentioned, they were clearly out of control, and the looting of the pubs hadn’t helped calm their anger. Fired up by their supposed grievances, alcohol, speeches, and the charged atmosphere of the crowd, they had spent the last few hours wreaking havoc in the town. The police had done all they could to stop the chaos and maintain order, but they were drastically outnumbered. Reinforcements and soldiers had been called for and were on their way, but for now, the local forces had pulled back to regroup and tend to their injuries. The strikers were in charge and thoroughly enjoying themselves.

Tony, whispering to his companion, "Keep close and don't get into arguments: pretend to be a labor leader, if you like!" pushed his way slowly through the crowd. Robert, his heart bumping with fear, interest and excitement, followed him; he was afraid, but not too afraid, and he felt that his holiday was proving a success. When they reached the center of interest, after a tardy but good-humored progress, they were rewarded with a sight neither had hoped for.

Tony whispered to his companion, "Stick close and don’t get into any arguments: act like you’re a labor leader, if you want!" as he slowly made his way through the crowd. Robert, his heart racing with fear, curiosity, and excitement, followed him; he was scared but not overly so, and he felt that his vacation was turning out to be a success. When they finally got to the center of attention, after a slow but cheerful journey, they were greeted with a sight neither of them had expected.

The thickest of the crowd was swaying round a large shop. It was termed the emporium, and almost merited the title. The happy anarchs had smashed every atom of the plate-glass, careless of the rate-payers, and then had proceeded to abolish such of the fittings as offended their esthetic sense. In the center of the window-space, standing on a chair, was a cheerful striker, conducting a kind of auction. More strictly, it was a charitable distribution, for no one made any effort to pay for the goods received. The shop was a miniature Whiteley's, embracing everything from a perambulator to a parachute, and it was odd to watch the incongruity of some of the articles distributed. One man, for example, was given a child's feeding-bottle, and accepted it without demur; with a bellow of approval he seized it by the rubber tube and whirled it round, shouting, till the tube broke and the bottle flew off at a tangent. Another received half a pianola—the whole was too much for him to carry, and kindly friends helped him to bisect it with clubs and bars. A third, bemused with beer, staggered off with a dozen volumes of Comparative Religion, murmuring brokenly. "Suthin' f'r the kids to read," and dropping at intervals his burden in the mud. It was a pleasant illustration of good feeling and unselfishness.

The thickest part of the crowd was gathered around a large store. It was called the emporium, and it almost deserved the name. The happy troublemakers had smashed every piece of the plate-glass, not caring about the taxpayers, and then went on to remove any fixtures that clashed with their taste. In the center of the window space, standing on a chair, was a cheerful striker, holding what looked like an auction. More accurately, it was a charitable giveaway, since no one tried to pay for the items they received. The shop was like a mini Whiteley's, with everything from a stroller to a parachute, and it was amusing to see the randomness of some of the items being handed out. One man, for instance, was given a baby’s feeding bottle, and took it without hesitation; with a shout of approval, he grabbed it by the rubber tube and spun it around, yelling, until the tube broke and the bottle flew off sideways. Another person got half of a pianola—the whole thing was too big for him to carry, so friendly folks helped him split it up with sticks and bars. A third man, tipsy from beer, staggered off with a dozen volumes of Comparative Religion, mumbling incoherently. "Something for the kids to read," he said, dropping his load in the mud every so often. It was a nice example of camaraderie and selflessness.

A few moments after Tony and Robert had penetrated to the front, ready-made clothing was being distributed with a lavish hand. The auctioneer would seize a suit, or a part of a suit, from the nearest peg, and with humorous or profane comments throw it to one of the crowd. "Who wants a waistcoat?" he was crying presently; "a regular fancy article, double-wove, stamped on every bleeding yard! Just the thing to fetch the girls! Just the thing to wear of a Sunday! and when the bloom's orf you can use it as an 'earth-rug or a tea-cozy! Just the thing—here y'are!" and he flung it to an outstretched hand.

A few moments after Tony and Robert got to the front, ready-made clothes were being handed out generously. The auctioneer would grab a suit or a piece of a suit from the nearest hook and, with funny or crude comments, toss it to someone in the crowd. "Who wants a waistcoat?" he shouted next; "a real fancy one, double-woven, marked on every single yard! Perfect for impressing the ladies! Ideal for Sundays! And once it’s worn out, you can use it as a floor mat or a tea cozy! Here you go!" and he threw it to someone with their hand out.

"Now's our chance if we want a change!" whispered Robert. He meant it as a joke, and trembled as he saw Tony's face light up with amusement. "Don't be a fool!" he whispered at once. "These chaps are simply mad——"

"Now’s our chance if we want things to change!" whispered Robert. He said it jokingly, and he shivered as he saw Tony’s face light up with laughter. "Don’t be an idiot!" he immediately whispered. "These guys are just crazy——"

"Could you oblige me with a suit?" asked Tony suavely, but in the clearest tones. The crowd turned at the university accent. Hitherto they had been too busy to notice the new arrival, but as they observed the opera hat, the smart broadcloth and starched linen, they recognized the presence of one of the upper classes and looked black. A murmur arose, growing in strength and hostility, and a voice suggested with painful clarity the dissection of his internal organs.

"Could you give me a suit?" Tony asked smoothly, but in a clear tone. The crowd turned at the university accent. Until then, they had been too busy to notice the newcomer, but as they saw the opera hat, the sharp broadcloth, and starched linen, they recognized that someone from the upper class was among them and scowled. A murmur started, growing in strength and hostility, and someone suggested with painful clarity the dissection of his internal organs.

Tony took in the situation: another minute, and grumbling threats might be exchanged for action of an unpleasant kind; there was not a moment to lose. "Let me show you a thing, comrades!" he said brightly; and before the smoldering wrath could burst into flame he took off his hat and smote it. The fabric collapsed with a ridiculous klop, and the crowd, taken by surprise and ready to laugh at the mere trifle, roared. Tony spun it into the air with a careless grace, far over the heads of the throng; and as all eyes were fixed on its trajectory he pushed his way forward. "A moment, please!" he urged, shouldering on toward the shop. "By your leave, sir! Excuse me, friend! Beg pardon, brother!" And behold! he was standing beside the auctioneer.

Tony assessed the situation: in just a minute, grumbling threats could turn into some unpleasant action; there wasn't a second to waste. "Let me show you something, everyone!" he said cheerfully; and before the simmering anger could explode, he took off his hat and slapped it. The fabric crumpled with a comical klop, and the crowd, caught off guard and ready to laugh at the silly act, erupted. Tony tossed it into the air with casual flair, soaring far above the heads of the crowd; and as all eyes were focused on its flight, he pushed his way forward. "Just a moment, please!" he insisted, elbowing his way toward the shop. "If you don’t mind, sir! Sorry, friend! Excuse me, brother!" And there he was, standing next to the auctioneer.

The latter glared his enmity, refusing to budge, but Tony took no heed. All trace of boredom gone, his eyes aglow with eagerness, he gesticulated for silence. The strikers, not wholly recovered from their surprise, postponed, at least for the time being, the suggested vivisection, and waited for Tony to justify himself. He was a fluent speaker, and lost no time in beginning.

The latter glared with hostility, refusing to move, but Tony ignored him. All signs of boredom disappeared, his eyes shining with excitement as he gestured for silence. The strikers, still a bit taken aback, decided to put off the proposed vivisection for now and waited for Tony to explain himself. He was a smooth talker and quickly got started.

"Comrades!" he cried, "you see me as I am! I am in the unhappy position of being without a hat and in evening dress. Unlooked-for events put me in a train this morning, and it was not until the train had started that I realized my absurd costume. What was I to do? Chance settled the question. Chance brought me here into your delightful neighborhood, and what do I find? A good fairy, as it were, distributing clothes for nothing!" At this point a voice called for "Cheers for the——fairy!" which were heartily given. The fairy, unused to badinage, retired from the rostrum, and Tony was quick to jump up. "You see, comrades, that I got a rise: may you soon get the same—may you get what you are asking for!" A tornado of cheers covered his corollary, "viz., six months hard," uttered in an undertone. Feeling was shifting a little in his favor now, and he swept on. "Here, I thought, is my opportunity! I am an outcast, dressed in the ridiculous garb civilization imposes on her sons—the pampered scions of the aristocracy! You have seen me discard my allegiance to the dukes: the crushing of the hat was symbolical. I hate the petty trammels of the curled and scented darlings of the rich! If you wish—if you will allow me to annex one of the admirable and useful suits of reach-me-downs—nine and elevenpence ha'penny off the peg—I will discard the remnants of an obsolete feudalism. My coat shall go! My waistcoat! Even my——"

"Comrades!" he shouted, "you see me for what I am! I'm stuck in a situation without a hat and in formal attire. Unexpected events put me on a train this morning, and it wasn't until we were moving that I realized how ridiculous I looked. What was I supposed to do? Fate made the choice for me. Fate brought me here to your lovely neighborhood, and what do I find? A good fairy, so to speak, giving away clothes for free!" At this point, someone yelled for "Cheers for the——fairy!" and the crowd responded enthusiastically. The fairy, not used to being teased, stepped down from the stage, and Tony quickly jumped up. "You see, comrades, that I got a reaction: may you soon get the same—may you get what you’re hoping for!" A wave of cheers drowned out his quieter remark, "like six months hard," which he whispered. The mood was shifting in his favor now, and he continued. "Here, I thought, is my chance! I’m an outcast, dressed in the absurd clothing that society forces on her children—the spoiled offspring of the wealthy! You've seen me renounce my loyalty to the dukes: crushing my hat was symbolic. I detest the trivial restraints of the pampered and perfumed princes of the rich! If you want—if you’ll let me take one of those wonderful and useful secondhand suits—nine shillings and eleven pence off the rack—I will get rid of the remnants of an outdated feudal system. My coat will go! My waistcoat! Even my——"

A prude cried "Shame!" Tony seized upon the word liked a practised ranter.

A prude shouted "Shame!" Tony grabbed onto the word like a seasoned ranter.

"Yes!" he cried warmly, "it is a shame that I should be forced to wear these loathsome garments when self-respect urges me to assume a manlier garb. May I take it that I have your assent? I put it to the meeting that I forthwith st—take what I want." He paused for breath, but they were dumb before this extraordinary creature. He hurried on. "Carried unanimously. Thank you, comrades, for this mark of appreciation and esteem. Behold!" He tore off his coat and waistcoat and trod upon them. "See how I trample the badge of servitude! Observe!" He discarded his nether apparel, knowing that he could not stick at trifles: the crowd's mood might turn if he gave it time. Luckily, his audacity was rewarded, for the audience roared with brutal joy at Tony's remarkable appearance. Without hesitation he snatched a suit from several that hung at hand, selecting the quietest he could see, talking furiously as he put it on. "And what now? See! a transformation! A man clothed in sensible dress! Hurrah for the social revolution! Hurrah for communizing the means of production and distribution—especially distribution! And all the rest of the dear old claptrap," he added sotto voce as he leaped nimbly down.

"Yes!" he exclaimed enthusiastically, "it is a shame that I have to wear these awful clothes when my self-respect tells me to wear something more manly. Can I take this as your agreement? I propose to the group that I immediately—take what I want." He paused to catch his breath, but they were speechless in front of this extraordinary person. He quickly continued. "Passed unanimously. Thank you, friends, for this sign of appreciation and respect. Look!" He ripped off his coat and vest and stepped on them. "See how I stomp on the symbol of servitude! Watch!" He removed his pants, knowing he couldn't hesitate: the crowd's mood might change if he gave it a moment. Fortunately, his boldness was rewarded, as the audience erupted in loud cheers at Tony's striking appearance. Without a moment's thought, he grabbed a suit from the several hanging around, choosing the most understated one he could find, speaking animatedly as he put it on. "And now? Look! A transformation! A man dressed sensibly! Cheers for the social revolution! Cheers for the collective ownership of production and distribution—especially distribution! And all the rest of the same old nonsense," he added quietly as he sprang down.

In the thunderous applause that followed the impassioned harangue Tony slipped his arms through Mr. Hedderwick's, and they were allowed to make good their escape. They walked in silence till they were clear of the crowd, and then Robert paused.

In the loud applause that came after the passionate speech, Tony hooked his arms through Mr. Hedderwick's, and they were able to make their getaway. They walked in silence until they were away from the crowd, and then Robert stopped.

"Mr. Wild, you were simply splendid!" he said in awestruck tones. "You're one of the best chaps I've ever met."

"Mr. Wild, you were absolutely amazing!" he said in an amazed voice. "You're one of the best guys I've ever met."

Tony chuckled, tired but pleased.

Tony chuckled, exhausted but happy.

"Not a bad effort, was it? But, by jove! I was in a funk half the time."

"Not a bad effort, right? But, wow! I was in a bad mood half the time."

"So was I," confessed Robert. "I began to think I might have to use this." He pulled a revolver out of his pocket and showed it. Tony crowed with pure joy.

"So was I," Robert admitted. "I started to think I might have to use this." He took a revolver out of his pocket and displayed it. Tony cheered with pure joy.

"Good lord, man! You've got a pistol! How perfectly splendid! What on earth do you carry a pistol for? Do tell me—please!"

"Wow, man! You've got a pistol! How awesome! What on earth do you carry a pistol for? Please, tell me—please!"

Mr. Hedderwick walked on in silence for a minute, evidently weighing some problem. Presently he gave a gulp of decision.

Mr. Hedderwick walked on in silence for a minute, clearly considering some issue. Then he swallowed hard, making up his mind.

"Mr. Wild," he said, "I haven't known you very long, but I seem to have known you for years. What I've seen has interested me—impressed me, and I like you. You know a little about me, that I'm off for a holiday on unusual lines, but unless you agree to my proposal I shan't tell you any more. You, it appears, are a free agent, young, with nothing to do. I think we might enjoy ourselves much more together than apart. In any case, if we found it didn't suit we could separate. If you feel like adventuring for a few days I think there may be a little fun. I can't promise it, but I think so. If you agree, I'll tell you the rest when we get to The Happy Heart."

"Mr. Wild," he said, "I haven't known you for very long, but it feels like I've known you for years. What I've seen has intrigued me—it's made an impression, and I like you. You know a bit about me; I'm heading off for an unusual holiday, but unless you agree to my proposal, I won't share any more. It seems you’re free, young, and with some time on your hands. I think we could have a lot more fun together than apart. If it doesn’t work out, we can always go our separate ways. If you're up for a little adventure for a few days, I think we might have some fun. I can't guarantee it, but I believe so. If you’re in, I'll fill you in on the rest when we reach The Happy Heart."

"One question," said Tony, "and don't be offended. Do you want any money?"

"One question," Tony said, "and please don't take this the wrong way. Do you need any money?"

Mr. Hedderwick thought for a moment and frowned. Then he smiled.

Mr. Hedderwick thought for a moment and frowned. Then he smiled.

"I have two and eightpence in my pocket," he said frankly. "I came out in a hurry. I could get more if I wanted, but I don't mean to try, for I have no wish to be traced yet. I'm not a cadger or a confidence-trickster. If you care to finance me till we return, so much the better for me. If not, well, I'll do without and rough it somehow. I don't mean to miss my holiday."

"I have two shillings and eight pence in my pocket," he said openly. "I left in a rush. I could get more if I wanted, but I don't plan to try, since I don't want to be tracked down yet. I'm not a beggar or a con artist. If you're willing to support me until we get back, that would be great for me. If not, well, I'll manage and make do somehow. I refuse to miss my vacation."

Tony smiled. This Hedderwick seemed an admirable fellow.

Tony smiled. This Hedderwick seemed like a great guy.

"What and where is The Happy Heart?" he asked.

"What is The Happy Heart, and where can I find it?" he asked.

"An inn at Shereling where I mean to stay."

"An inn in Shereling where I plan to stay."

"Forward, then, to The Happy Heart. I wish I'd bagged some boots, too. These pumps are simply cruel."

"Moving on to The Happy Heart. I wish I had grabbed some boots, too. These shoes are just brutal."

They set out once more toward the station.

They headed out again towards the station.


CHAPTER XI

AT THE HAPPY HEART

The landlord of The Happy Heart stood leaning against his door-post, smoking a churchwarden. He was enjoying his tobacco and the summer morning, and occasionally directing a bovine thought to the identity of the solitary guest at present lying in bed up-stairs. The said guest had arrived two days before with a view to golf, for the Shereling links were well known. The Happy Heart was rarely without a golf enthusiast, since it was the only inn in Shereling, the local squire (at present yachting) owning most of the land in the neighborhood, and refusing to let "his" village become an abiding-place for tourists. Wherefore the neighboring town of Dallingham, six miles distant, reaped a golden harvest, and its hotels were out of all proportion to its population.

The landlord of The Happy Heart was leaning against his doorframe, smoking a long pipe. He was enjoying his tobacco and the summer morning while occasionally pondering who the lone guest upstairs was. This guest had arrived two days earlier to play golf, as the Shereling links were quite popular. The Happy Heart always had a golf lover staying there since it was the only inn in Shereling. The local landowner, who was currently out yachting, owned most of the land around but refused to let his village become a permanent home for tourists. As a result, the nearby town of Dallingham, six miles away, was thriving, and its hotels were vastly disproportionate to the town’s population.

The guest up-stairs, to return to the landlord's vaguely moving thoughts, was a man well over seventy, but active for his age. An olive complexion hinted that he was no Briton, but the testimony of the green-keepers went to prove that his English was "floont"; and of the magnitude of his tips the odd-job man of The Happy Heart could not say enough. A man of seventy may be excused for showing reserve or desiring quiet, and the landlord did not think it curious that the visitor divided his time between the links and his bedroom: the man was certainly a gentleman, perhaps an aristocrat, and there was no doubt that his money was good. The only thing that bothered the landlord was—why had he brought no servant? It did not occur to him that solitude to the great may be worth more than the benignities of a valet.

The guest upstairs, to get back to the landlord's somewhat wandering thoughts, was a man well over seventy but still active for his age. His olive complexion suggested he wasn't British, but the green-keepers confirmed that his English was "fluent"; and the odd-job man at The Happy Heart couldn’t stop talking about how generous his tips were. A seventy-year-old might be excused for being reserved or wanting some peace, so the landlord didn’t find it odd that the visitor spent his time between the golf course and his room: the man was definitely a gentleman, maybe even an aristocrat, and it was clear his money was good. The one thing that puzzled the landlord was—why did he have no servant? It didn’t cross his mind that solitude might be more valuable to those of high status than the comforts of a valet.

The landlord shaded his eyes with a browned hand and looked down the road. There was nothing to be seen. With an effort that was mental as well as physical he turned himself upon the axis of the door-post and blinked in the other direction. Here the figure of a man rewarded him, walking steadily but without hurry toward the inn. "One of they golfing chaps from the station," was the landlord's first thought; "he must be mortal keen to come so early." His mild surprise changed to blank amazement as the stranger drew near. "Top hat, gloves, et setterer," he muttered. "A swell an' all! What's he doing of here?" He was still ruminating when the stranger halted, surveyed the tavern sign, and entered. The landlord followed him into the parlor.

The landlord squinted against the bright light and looked down the road. There was nothing in sight. With a mental and physical effort, he turned on the doorpost and blinked in the opposite direction. There, a man was approaching steadily but without rushing toward the inn. "One of those golfing guys from the station," was the landlord's first thought; "he must be really eager to get here so early." His mild surprise turned into complete amazement as the stranger got closer. "Top hat, gloves, and all that," he muttered. "A fancy guy! What's he doing here?" He was still pondering this when the stranger stopped, looked at the tavern sign, and walked in. The landlord followed him into the parlor.

"A quart of beer, please," said Lionel, sitting down with relish on the nearest bench. The landlord, his surprise in no way lessened by the order, went and drew the beer. He placed it before his customer, and then said, "You're early astir, sir."

"A quart of beer, please," Lionel said, settling onto the nearest bench with satisfaction. The landlord, still surprised by the order, went to pour the beer. He set it down in front of Lionel and then said, "You're up early, sir."

"Ten o'clock early?" said Lionel. "I thought that country people called that late."

"Ten o'clock in the morning?" Lionel said. "I thought people in the countryside considered that late."

"Not if you come by train, sir, as I suppose you did. A friend o' mine—Jeggs the farmer—drove by here twenty minutes agone. He said that the first train, the five o'clock, had only just come in, being delayed by the strikers. I suppose you came by that?"

"Not if you came by train, sir, as I assume you did. A friend of mine—Jeggs the farmer—drove by here twenty minutes ago. He said that the first train, the five o'clock one, had just arrived, being delayed by the strikers. I guess you arrived on that?"

"Yes," said Lionel, "I did."

"Yes," Lionel replied, "I did."

"And did you see anything of the strike, sir?"

"And did you see anything about the strike, sir?"

"No," said Lionel; "I stayed in the train—in fact, I slept all the way, being tired."

"No," Lionel said. "I stayed on the train—I actually slept the whole way because I was tired."

The landlord, seeing that the other was in no communicative mood, withdrew, after begging him to ring the bell if he wanted further refreshment. Lionel, left to the kindly solitude of the parlor, put up his legs on the bench with a sigh of relief, took a draught of the beer, and lighted a pipe.

The landlord, noticing that the other man wasn’t in the mood to talk, left after asking him to ring the bell if he wanted more drinks. Lionel, left in the comfortable solitude of the parlor, propped his legs up on the bench with a sigh of relief, took a sip of the beer, and lit a pipe.

He was very tired, in spite of the sleep he had spoken of. With the exception of that brief and disturbed period in the train he had not slept for some twenty-six hours, and in addition, he had been through sundry diverting experiences. The successful burglary had been a strain, and after he and Beatrice had got back to the flat they had spent the next three hours in discussing and planning. They had searched every room, nook and cranny for some trace of Mizzi, some clew as to where she might have flown. Of course it was useless: not a scrap of paper—not a single compromising document rewarded their efforts. Only some blackened ashes in the bedroom grate hinted at possibilities. She had left nearly all her clothes and personal belongings, and her boxes were unlocked as if to invite inspection. She had simply disappeared—gone, like one in a melodrama, "out into the night."

He was really tired, despite the sleep he mentioned. Aside from that short and restless period on the train, he hadn’t slept in about twenty-six hours, and on top of that, he had gone through a bunch of exciting experiences. The successful burglary had been exhausting, and after he and Beatrice returned to the apartment, they spent the next three hours discussing and planning. They searched every room, nook, and cranny for any sign of Mizzi, any clue about where she might have gone. Of course, it was useless: not a single scrap of paper—not one compromising document came from their efforts. Only some charred ashes in the bedroom fireplace hinted at possibilities. She had left almost all her clothes and personal belongings behind, and her boxes were unlocked as if inviting them to look inside. She had just vanished—gone, like someone in a melodrama, "out into the night."

It was of the utmost importance to trace her, but what could be done? It was obvious that detectives should not be employed, for a hint of official interference might mean the death of Lukos. Beatrice and Lionel must do their own detection, and they spent their brains on the problem, apparently so hopeless.

It was crucial to find her, but what could be done? Clearly, hiring detectives was not an option, as any sign of official involvement could cost Lukos his life. Beatrice and Lionel needed to take matters into their own hands, and they spent a lot of time and effort trying to solve the problem, which seemed almost impossible.

Even the cause of Mizzi's disloyalty was anything but clear. It might be that she was in the pay of the sultan, or it might be that she wished to be revenged. But why revenge? Beatrice, with a twinkle that made Lionel feel qualms of conscience, suggested jealousy; but the suggestion was thrown out in such an airy spirit that he felt she did not really believe in it. He himself preferred to believe, and did believe, that the more sensational hypothesis should be adopted. She must be a spy, who meant to get a good price for the famous papers. But why had she not stolen them before? Perhaps she had been in treaty with the enemy but had failed to get the terms she wanted. It did not seem adequate, but it was the only solution they could suggest.

Even the reason for Mizzi's betrayal was far from clear. She might have been working for the sultan, or maybe she wanted revenge. But why revenge? Beatrice, with a mischievous glint that made Lionel feel uneasy, suggested jealousy; however, her tone was so lighthearted that he sensed she didn't really believe it. He preferred to think, and truly believed, that the more dramatic theory should be accepted. She had to be a spy, aiming to sell the famous documents for a good price. But why hadn’t she taken them before? Maybe she had been negotiating with the enemy but couldn’t get the deal she wanted. It didn't seem like enough, but it was the only explanation they could come up with.

Assuming, then, that she had stolen the papers to make money, what would be her first step? Beatrice—and Lionel agreed with her—thought that she was too clever to deal with underlings: she would go as near to the fountainhead as she could, to the Turkish ambassador himself, for he was a known adherent of the old régime. She would go as soon as possible, the next morning—i.e., about the present, what time Lionel was drinking beer in The Happy Heart,—but a dim recollection was beating in the brain of Beatrice that she had seen something of importance in the society news of a few days past. They searched the flat for every newspaper, and at last found the sheet they wanted. Hope beating at the doors, they scanned the column that Lionel never read, but that Beatrice studied first. Yes! there it was—the justification of her memory for seeming trivialities. "His excellency the Turkish ambassador has gone for a few days' golf to Shereling." Beatrice threw the paper away in flushed triumph, thought deeply for a few moments, and then said, "You must go there. Mizzi may follow and try to succeed at Shereling. Watch and do the best you can. I shall stay in London in case I am wrong, and keep an eye on the embassy. If she is at Shereling, try to get the treaty. I must leave you to work on your own lines. If I hear anything I shall wire to the local inn. Will you?"

Assuming she stole the papers to make money, what would her first step be? Beatrice—and Lionel agreed—thought she was too smart to deal with subordinates: she would go as close to the source as possible, to the Turkish ambassador himself, since he was known to support the old regime. She planned to go as soon as she could, the next morning—about the time Lionel was having a beer at The Happy Heart—but a vague memory was nagging at Beatrice that she had seen something important in the society news a few days ago. They searched the apartment for every newspaper and finally found the one they needed. With hope racing in their hearts, they scanned the column that Lionel never read, but Beatrice always looked at first. Yes! There it was—the validation of her memory for what seemed like inconsequential details. "His Excellency the Turkish ambassador is away for a few days of golf at Shereling." Beatrice tossed the paper away in flushed triumph, thought deeply for a moment, and then said, "You have to go there. Mizzi might follow and try to make her move at Shereling. Keep an eye out and do your best. I’ll stay in London just in case I'm wrong and monitor the embassy. If she is at Shereling, try to get the treaty. I’ll leave you to work on your own. If I hear anything, I’ll send a message to the local inn. Will you?"

Of course he said, "Yes. Is there anything else?"

Of course he replied, "Yes. Is there anything else?"

"Money. No—do not protest. This is life and death, and both cost money." She ran to a little safe and returned, her hands full. "Here are notes for a hundred pounds or more. You may have to bribe. Do not refuse—it is for Lukos!"

"Money. No—don't argue. This is about life and death, and both come with a price." She rushed to a small safe and came back, her hands full. "Here are notes for a hundred pounds or more. You might need to bribe someone. Don't say no—it's for Lukos!"

Lionel longed to say, "Madam, my life and fortune are at your disposal. Let there be no mention of money between us." But seeing that his stock of ready cash had dwindled to twopence-halfpenny (he had bought a packet of ten cigarettes the day before, and now cursed the extravagance), he could only say, "As you will."

Lionel wanted to say, "Madam, my life and fortune are yours to command. Let's not talk about money." But since his cash had shrunk to two and a half pence (he had bought a pack of ten cigarettes the day before and now regretted the expense), he could only respond, "As you wish."

"Thank you," she said softly, and laid her hand on his head. He thrilled, and she administered a necessary antidote. "It is for Lukos!"

"Thanks," she said gently, placing her hand on his head. He felt a rush of excitement, and she gave him a crucial antidote. "It’s for Lukos!"

"Oh, hang Lukos!" he groaned in spirit; and then in swift repentance his thoughts mumbled, "No, no! Bless Lukos—dear old Lukos! Poor old chap!"

"Oh, forget Lukos!" he groaned internally; and then in a rush of regret his thoughts stumbled, "No, no! Bless Lukos—dear old Lukos! Poor guy!"

After this there had been nothing but idle conversation until the hour of his departure approached. Once Beatrice fell into a fit of musing and presently she said, "What a fool I was to tell Mizzi!" A younger man might have said, "Not at all: it was perfectly natural." Lionel, older, more self-reliant, and more honest, replied simply, "We all make mistakes," for he thought her folly almost incredible. She felt this—they were more than sympathiques—and said, "Ah! if you knew! I was very lonely one night ... lonely and sad ... I had to talk to some one, and believed her a true friend. You can imagine my self-reproach." He could, and felt himself more than justified in pressing her hand.

After this, there was nothing but small talk until it was time for him to leave. At one point, Beatrice fell into deep thought and said, "What a fool I was to tell Mizzi!" A younger man might have said, "Not at all: it was totally understandable." Lionel, older, more self-sufficient, and more honest, replied simply, "We all make mistakes," because he thought her mistake was almost unbelievable. She sensed this—they were more than sympathiques—and said, "Ah! if you only knew! I was really lonely one night ... lonely and sad ... I needed to talk to someone, and I thought she was a true friend. You can imagine how I felt afterward." He could, and felt completely justified in holding her hand.

Presently there had been some suspense, for when the time came for him to leave the flat, at half past four, Beatrice had peeped from the window and imagined that she saw a man watching the house. Lionel peeped too, but could see nothing. Nevertheless they had waited another ten minutes, as long as they dared if he was to catch the first train. But at length he resolved to risk a spy, and after a brief, tense, but outwardly calm "good-by" he had left the house. By taking a cab he reached Euston in time, and at last was established in the train. So far as he knew, he had not been followed: the only stranger he had noticed had been a man who was in the train before he was on the platform, so from him there could be nothing to fear.

Right now, there was some tension because when it was time for him to leave the apartment at four-thirty, Beatrice had peeked out the window and thought she saw a man watching the house. Lionel looked too, but saw nothing. Still, they waited another ten minutes, the longest they could if he wanted to catch the first train. Eventually, he decided to take the risk of a spy, and after a quick, tense, but outwardly calm "goodbye," he left the house. By taking a cab, he got to Euston in time and finally boarded the train. As far as he knew, he hadn’t been followed; the only stranger he noticed was a man who was already on the train when he got to the platform, so he had nothing to worry about.

And now he was in The Happy Heart, resting after a dusty three-mile walk from Shereling station, drinking good English beer, far from all thought of Oriental craft and scheming. He was in Shereling, on the second stage of his fond adventure. What was to be the first step?

And now he was at The Happy Heart, relaxing after a dusty three-mile walk from Shereling station, enjoying a nice English beer, far removed from any thoughts of Eastern tricks and plotting. He was in Shereling, on the next phase of his cherished adventure. What should the first step be?

In spite of the rest and beer he felt discontented, and glumly wished that Beatrice were at hand. To what end? To advise, direct, console, or soothe? He hardly knew, but darkly suspected that it was for the weaker reason. Idly he allowed himself to remember the touch of her delightful fingers, cool, nervous and alluring: the seduction of her hair, the brilliant command of her eyes. But it was not these only that inspired his grateful remembrance: it was also her lovely personality, her courage, her charm, herself. Of course it could not be love; that was absurd. It was a flame kindled by the sympathy of a comrade—the kind of comrade he had never known. Possibly the fact that he had not enjoyed any extensive woman-friendships during the recent years had made him exaggerate her qualities: she might be rare, but could she be so rare as he thought her? Supposing he met some other delightful woman soon, might not the pleasant image of Beatrice lose something of its luster? He shook himself impatiently; it was a foolish thought. Other women might be delightful, charming, desirable, but there could only be a single Beatrice. How pretty she was! How—and here the figure of Lukos beckoned a grim warning: "It is time you put your shoulder to the wheel, my ... friends!"

Despite the rest and beer, he felt unsatisfied and gloomily wished Beatrice were nearby. For what reason? To advise, guide, comfort, or calm him? He hardly knew, but he suspected it was for the weaker reason. He idly allowed himself to remember the feel of her delightful fingers, cool, nervous, and enticing: the allure of her hair, the captivating power of her eyes. But it wasn’t just these that inspired his grateful memories; it was also her lovely personality, her bravery, her charm, her whole being. Of course, it couldn’t be love; that was ridiculous. It was a spark ignited by the bond of a companion—the kind of companion he had never experienced. Perhaps the lack of meaningful friendships with women in recent years made him exaggerate her qualities: she might be special, but could she be as exceptional as he believed? What if he met another wonderful woman soon; wouldn’t Beatrice’s image lose some of its shine? He shook off the thought impatiently; it was silly. Other women might be delightful, charming, and desirable, but there could only be one Beatrice. How beautiful she was! How—and here the figure of Lukos signaled a grim reminder: "It’s time you put your shoulder to the wheel, my ... friends!"

"All right, old chap—all right!" said Lionel petulantly to the shade. "Don't be in such a beastly hurry. It's not love ... it's not love, I tell you. Just a superlative esteem for your splendid wife.... Your wife," he added with a martyr's sigh. And then he raised the tankard, feeling that it ought to hold Tokay. "Here's to her!" he murmured, drinking deep. He put the pewter down, but raised it again. "And to you, old chap!" he added generously. "... Hullo! there's none left. Beg pardon."

"All right, my friend—all right!" Lionel said irritably to the shadow. "Don’t rush me. It’s not love... it’s not love, I promise. Just a great respect for your amazing wife... Your wife," he added with a dramatic sigh. Then he lifted the tankard, wishing it was full of Tokay. "Here’s to her!" he murmured, taking a deep drink. He set the pewter down but picked it up again. "And to you, my friend!" he added generously. "... Oh! It's empty. Sorry about that."

As he finished, the door opened and admitted a chubby little clergyman, who sat down with a courteous "Good morning!" Lionel made haste to remove his legs from the bench. The landlord followed close upon the heels of the newcomer. "Morning, sir," said the landlord respectfully. "Will you take anything?"

As he finished, the door opened and let in a plump little clergyman, who sat down with a polite "Good morning!" Lionel quickly took his legs off the bench. The landlord came in right behind the newcomer. "Morning, sir," said the landlord respectfully. "Can I get you something to drink?"

"Draught cider. Half a pint," said the clergyman briskly. The landlord disappeared, and he turned, smiling. "You should try the cider of The Happy Heart," he said—"that is, if you have not done so already. I allow myself that as a concession to the flesh."

"Draught cider. Half a pint," the clergyman said quickly. The landlord walked away, and he turned, smiling. "You should try the cider from The Happy Heart," he said—"that is, if you haven't already. I consider that a little indulgence."

"And a sensible concession, too," replied Lionel heartily. He was pleased that a gentleman in Holy Orders did not think it undignified to drink in a common "pub." "I have been drinking beer, and very good it is—or was. But I must try the cider, if I remain here."

"And that's a pretty reasonable concession," Lionel said with enthusiasm. He was happy that a man of the cloth didn’t find it beneath him to drink in a regular bar. "I've been having some beer, and it's quite good—or it was. But I have to try the cider while I'm here."

"Staying long?" asked the other pleasantly. And when Lionel said, guardedly, that he had not quite settled yet, the clergyman did not pursue the question, but passed on to other themes. "I am the local parson," he said chattily. "My name is Peters." As he spoke the landlord came back with the clerical cider and a telegram.

"Staying long?" the other person asked cheerfully. When Lionel replied, cautiously, that he hadn't fully decided yet, the clergyman didn't press further but moved on to other topics. "I'm the local pastor," he said casually. "My name is Peters." Just then, the landlord returned with the clerical cider and a telegram.

"Does your name happen to be Mortimer, sir?" he asked. "Because if so, this here telegram is for you."

"Is your name Mortimer, sir?" he asked. "Because if it is, this telegram is for you."

"It is," said Lionel in some surprise. The wire could only be from Beatrice, but he had not expected any communication from her as yet. With a brief apology he opened the yellow envelope and read its contents. It was all he could do to keep from betraying his astonishment. The wire read as follows:—

"It is," Lionel said, a bit surprised. The wire could only be from Beatrice, but he hadn't expected to hear from her just yet. With a quick apology, he opened the yellow envelope and read what it said. He could barely contain his shock. The wire said the following:—

"Hope you had pleasant journey. My suspicions deepen. Try stay Arkwright twin. Suspect even her. Wait further wire.—Blair."

"Hope you had a good trip. I'm becoming more suspicious. Try to stay close to the Arkwright twins. I even suspect her. Wait for more updates.—Blair."

He read the telegram three times, but it was not till the third reading that he grasped the import of "Arkwright twin." He knew no one of the name of Arkwright, nor had he ever claimed acquaintance with a twin. "The nearest I could do is triplets," he thought. "Johnson of the House was a triplet, I remember, but that's no good to me.... Who on earth...?" And then he recalled Beatrice saying that she had a twin sister who had disapproved of her stage career. Of course it must be she. He had been so accustomed to think of his preceptress as Beatrice Blair that he had almost forgotten it must be a stage name. And so she was really an Arkwright—rather a pretty name on the whole, though unworthy of her high claims; failing Beatrice Blair, it ought to have been Rosalind ... Rosalind what? Rosalind Roy ... Rosalind Gay ... Rosalind Ebbsfleet ... Rosalind Wise.... He smiled as his thoughts played with a score of dainty conceits. He was roused to common sense and depression by the remembrance that she was really Mrs. Lukos. But was Lukos a surname? "Let's hope not," he reflected sourly.

He read the telegram three times, but it wasn't until the third reading that he understood the meaning of "Arkwright twin." He didn't know anyone named Arkwright, nor had he ever claimed to know a twin. "The closest I could get is triplets," he thought. "Johnson from the House was a triplet, I remember, but that doesn’t help me... Who on earth...?" Then he remembered Beatrice mentioning that she had a twin sister who was against her acting career. Of course, it had to be her. He had gotten so used to thinking of his mentor as Beatrice Blair that he had almost forgotten it was probably a stage name. So she was actually an Arkwright—pretty nice name, overall, though not really matching her high standards; failing Beatrice Blair, it should have been Rosalind ... Rosalind what? Rosalind Roy ... Rosalind Gay ... Rosalind Ebbsfleet ... Rosalind Wise.... He smiled as his thoughts danced around a bunch of charming ideas. But he was brought back to reality and feeling down by the reminder that she was really Mrs. Lukos. But was Lukos even a last name? "Let's hope not," he thought bitterly.

"No bad news, I trust," said the chubby clergyman, with a polite but ecclesiastical inflection.

"No bad news, I hope," said the chubby clergyman, with a polite but church-like tone.

"No—no," answered Lionel abruptly. He abandoned Rosalind completely and tried to arrange his thoughts. "By the way, do you happen to know any one of the name of Arkwright in the neighborhood?"

"No—no," Lionel replied abruptly. He completely turned away from Rosalind and tried to gather his thoughts. "By the way, do you happen to know anyone named Arkwright in the area?"

The chubby clergyman looked interested.

The plump clergyman looked interested.

"I do and I don't," he said, pulling his chair close to the table and leaning on his elbows. "A Miss Arkwright lives at The Quiet House. She has been the tenant for only two months, and nobody has seen her yet."

"I do and I don't," he said, pulling his chair closer to the table and resting on his elbows. "A Miss Arkwright lives at The Quiet House. She's been the tenant for just two months, and no one has seen her yet."

"What!"

"What?!"

"It sounds odd," said the clergyman with the smile of one who has an interesting story for a virgin audience, "but it is true. She calls on nobody, and denies herself to every caller. She is never seen in the village except when driving in her motor, and I am sorry to say that she does not come to church."

"It sounds strange," said the clergyman with the smile of someone who has an intriguing story for an unsuspecting audience, "but it’s true. She doesn’t visit anyone and turns away every caller. You only catch a glimpse of her in the village when she’s driving her car, and I regret to say that she doesn’t come to church."

"But surely something is known of her,—through the servants, for instance——"

"But surely something is known about her—through the staff, for example——"

"She has a housekeeper, I believe, who makes friends with nobody; a dumb gardener and a dumb footman. A little extraordinary, eh?" He rubbed his hands with zest. "But it is true none the less. Of course, all sorts of gossip have been greedily accepted. I never listen to gossip—one has to think of one's position—but some things can not be hid.... They say she takes motor drives at night,—every night. I do not credit the 'every'—exaggeration is so prevalent. I always believe less than half what the villagers tell me—that is, what drifts round to my ears."

"She has a housekeeper, I think, who doesn’t socialize with anyone; a silent gardener and a mute footman. A bit unusual, right?" He rubbed his hands together eagerly. "But it's true nonetheless. Of course, there's been all sorts of gossip that's been eagerly accepted. I don't pay attention to gossip—one has to consider their status—but some things can’t be hidden... They say she goes for drives in the car at night—every night. I don't believe the 'every'—exaggeration is so common. I typically believe less than half of what the villagers tell me—that is, what comes to my attention."

"But what does she do all day?" asked Lionel. Clearly this was a queer state of affairs.

"But what does she do all day?" Lionel asked. Clearly, this was a strange situation.

"I do not know. Her grounds are large. Perhaps she gardens."

"I don't know. Her property is big. Maybe she has a garden."

"You do not think there is any fear of ... of a scandal?" asked Lionel in a pained voice, anxious not to wound.

"You don't think there's any chance of ... a scandal, do you?" Lionel asked in a pained voice, trying not to hurt anyone's feelings.

"I trust not ... I trust not. I have no reason to think.... Of course, things do look odd, and my wife says ... but, no! I am sure she must be wrong. I ... I hope so."

"I don’t trust it ... I don’t trust it. I have no reason to think... Of course, things do look strange, and my wife says ... but, no! I’m sure she must be wrong. I ... I hope so."

"Mrs. Peters has heard——?" hazarded Lionel. The clergyman shook his head with dignity.

"Mrs. Peters has heard——?" Lionel guessed. The clergyman shook his head with dignity.

"Nothing. Nothing. My wife called, but was refused admittance. Naturally she, as the vicar's wife, felt a little hurt...."

"Nothing. Nothing. My wife called, but she was turned away. Naturally, she, as the vicar's wife, felt a bit hurt...."

"Of course," agreed Lionel. "But no other friends come? Nobody in motors?"

"Of course," Lionel agreed. "But no other friends are coming? Nobody who's into cars?"

"I believe not. I should have heard,—it would have drifted round to me in the course of time."

"I don't think so. I would have heard about it eventually; it would have come to me over time."

"Nobody stays here, I suppose?"

"Nobody stays here, right?"

"Oh, yes—golfers. One is here now—an excellent man,—old and of foreign origin, I believe. He calls himself Beckett; but he has told me (in confidence) that he is here for rest, incognito. He may be somebody of importance—an excellent man, however. He gave me a guinea for our restoration fund the day I showed him the church."

"Oh, yes—golfers. There's one here right now—he's a great guy, older and from another country, I think. He goes by Beckett, but he told me (in confidence) that he’s here to relax, under the radar. He might be someone important—he really is a great guy. He donated a guinea to our restoration fund the day I took him to see the church."

"The ambassador!" was Lionel's swift conclusion; and then aloud, "Has he been here long?"

"The ambassador!" Lionel quickly concluded; then he asked out loud, "Has he been here long?"

"Three days. For golf. We have played a few rounds." He smiled at some hidden joy. "He is not very good, for even I can give him a stroke a hole. Uncommunicative—very, but interesting, a gentleman, and I should say a seeker."

"Three days. For golf. We've played a few rounds." He smiled with some hidden joy. "He’s not very good; I can give him a stroke a hole. He’s pretty quiet—very, actually—but interesting, a gentleman, and I’d say a seeker."

"Ah!" said Lionel, getting up. "Well, I must go on. Can you tell me how to find The Quiet House?"

"Ah!" Lionel said, standing up. "Well, I need to keep going. Can you tell me how to find The Quiet House?"

The other gasped.

The other one gasped.

"You are going to call!" He recollected himself and apologized. "I beg your pardon, but ... go straight down the road ... the prettiest house on the right. By the way, if you are staying here I should be happy to take you round the links. Or show you the church——"

"You are going to call!" He gathered himself and said sorry. "I’m really sorry, but... just go straight down the road... it’s the cutest house on the right. By the way, if you’re staying here, I’d be happy to show you around the golf course. Or take you to the church——"

"Thank you," said Lionel. "You are very good, but I don't know how long I shall be staying."

"Thanks," said Lionel. "You’re really kind, but I’m not sure how long I’ll be staying."

"Well, come round and smoke a pipe after dinner," suggested the clergyman. His eagerness to secure one who knew Miss Arkwright was poorly disguised. "I would say, come and dine, but Mrs. Peters...."

"Well, come over and smoke a pipe after dinner," suggested the clergyman. His eagerness to have someone who knew Miss Arkwright was barely hidden. "I would say, come and have dinner, but Mrs. Peters...."

He left it to be understood that Mrs. Peters' permission must first be obtained. Lionel could hardly restrain a smile. "Thank you," he said; "I can not promise yet, but I will remember. Good-by."

He made it clear that he needed to get Mrs. Peters' permission first. Lionel could barely hold back a smile. "Thanks," he said; "I can't promise anything yet, but I’ll keep it in mind. Bye."

He left Mr. Peters rejoicing over a fresh piece of news that had "drifted round," which he meant to retail to his wife at the earliest opportunity. As he sat down again to finish his modest allowance, Tony Wild and Mr. Hedderwick made an unobtrusive appearance. They had watched Lionel turn the corner before approaching, for Robert was not anxious to meet his late visitor by daylight.

He left Mr. Peters excited about a new piece of gossip that had "drifted around," which he planned to share with his wife as soon as possible. As he sat down again to finish his small meal, Tony Wild and Mr. Hedderwick showed up quietly. They had waited until Lionel turned the corner before coming over, as Robert was not keen to run into his recent visitor in the daylight.

"Good morning, sir," said Tony. He turned to his friend,—"What's yours? Mine is beer, and lots of it!"

"Good morning, sir," said Tony. He turned to his friend, "What about you? Mine's beer, and a lot of it!"

"Mine's bed," said Robert, and sat down with a yawn.

"That's my bed," said Robert, and sat down with a yawn.


CHAPTER XII

CROSSED ORBITS

There are few things more restful than watching other people working hard, and the sensation is doubly piquant when one is sitting in the shade watching the worker toiling beneath the sun. Mrs. Peters was sitting in the shade; and though she would have denied the suggestion of idleness (for was she not picking the names of likely helpers for the imminent bazaar?), it was not unpleasant to observe Brown, the odd-job man, mowing the lawn. He seemed willing, though of course you must remember he had been taken on only two days ago, and besides, knew that the mistress had her eye on him; sober, too, refusing beer in favor of lemonade—but there! that might be hypocrisy, for there is always something, and these quiet men are often worse than the patently unsteady. Probably he gambled.... Still, at present he was undeniably working, and he had sense enough to oil the machine every quarter of an hour.

There are few things more relaxing than watching other people work hard, and it’s even better when you’re sitting in the shade while they’re toiling away in the sun. Mrs. Peters was enjoying the shade; and even though she would deny being idle (after all, she was picking names for potential helpers for the upcoming bazaar), it was nice to watch Brown, the handyman, mowing the lawn. He seemed eager to work, although it’s worth noting he had only been hired two days ago, and he knew the boss was watching him. He was also being responsible, choosing lemonade over beer—but that could just be an act, because you never know, and those quiet guys can sometimes be worse than the obviously troubled ones. He probably had some gambling issues... Still, for now, he was definitely working, and he had enough sense to oil the machine every fifteen minutes.

The vicarage lawn was big enough for two tennis-courts, with a little over for croquet in miniature or clock-golf. It took, theoretically, an able-bodied man an hour and a half to "run the machine over it." The optimistic phrase was the vicar's, who had not run the machine (or its predecessors) for twenty years. A succession of practical runners made the sum come out differently; and one rebellious soul—"of course, my dear, a radical chapel-goer"—had invited his employer to shove the qualified mower himself and see if 'e could do it in a qualified howerananarf. The sporting offer was not accepted, but the idealistic standard maintained. It was, in fact, a grass-cutting bogy who had never been beaten yet.

The vicarage lawn was large enough for two tennis courts, with a bit left over for some mini-croquet or clock golf. It supposedly took a fit man an hour and a half to "mow the lawn." That optimistic phrase came from the vicar, who hadn’t actually mowed the lawn (or used its predecessors) in twenty years. A series of practical mowers showed a different reality; one rebellious person—"of course, my dear, a radical chapel-goer"—even challenged his boss to try mowing it himself and see if he could do it in an hour and a half. The offer wasn’t taken up, but the ideal standard remained. In fact, it was a grass-cutting bogey that had never been defeated.

"Be careful, Brown," said Mrs. Peters, preparatory to a departure indoors, "to gather up all the grass and put it in the sack. It looks so untidy if you leave any lying about."

"Be careful, Brown," Mrs. Peters said as she got ready to go inside, "to collect all the grass and put it in the sack. It looks so messy if you leave any lying around."

"Yes, ma'am," said Brown respectfully; "I'll be sure to do so. I ought to finish in half an hour or so."

"Sure thing, ma'am," said Brown respectfully; "I'll make sure to do that. I should be done in about half an hour."

"Less, if you work, Brown," said Mrs. Peters reprovingly. She knew he had been mowing for little over an hour, but discipline must be kept up. Besides, does not Browning say, "A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a Heaven for?" Without waiting for possible protests she went into the house.

"Less, if you work, Brown," Mrs. Peters said with a disapproving look. She knew he had been mowing for just over an hour, but discipline needed to be maintained. Besides, doesn’t Browning say, "A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a Heaven for?" Without waiting for any protests, she went inside the house.

The odd-job man smiled.

The handyman smiled.

"She's all right," he said softly to no one in particular. "Oh, lor', yes!... She's all right."

"She's fine," he said softly to no one in particular. "Oh, wow, yes!... She's fine."

He whistled softly, but without obvious discontent, and made a change in his labors. Giving the machine a well-earned rest, he began to gather up the cut grass from a square of canvas that lay extended on the ground and stuffed it into the sack referred to by Mrs. Peters. This task brought him near the tall privet-hedge, reinforced by a four-foot paling, which sheltered the vicarage garden from the road. He had hardly accounted for a dozen armfuls when a voice from the other side of the hedge said, "Good morning."

He whistled softly, but without any clear unhappiness, and switched up his tasks. After giving the machine a much-needed break, he started to gather the cut grass from a patch of canvas spread out on the ground and stuffed it into the sack mentioned by Mrs. Peters. This job brought him close to the tall privet hedge, supported by a four-foot fence, which protected the vicarage garden from the road. He had barely collected a dozen armfuls when a voice from the other side of the hedge said, "Good morning."

Regardless of Mrs. Peters' late instructions, the odd-job man dropped a generous portion of grass and stood transfixed. "So you've come!" he said quietly but distinctly. "For goodness' sake let's have a look at your pretty face!"

Regardless of Mrs. Peters' late instructions, the handyman dropped a generous amount of grass and stood frozen. "So you’ve arrived!" he said softly but clearly. "For goodness' sake, let’s see your pretty face!"

The privet-hedge parted, and a damsel of twenty-three smiled upon the gratified Brown.

The privet hedge opened up, and a twenty-three-year-old woman smiled at the pleased Brown.

"Is that better?" she asked.

"Is that better?" she asked.

"Lots," replied the odd-job man, pressing closer to the hedge. "But I tell you what would be better still——"

"Plenty," replied the handyman, moving closer to the hedge. "But I’ll tell you what would be even better——"

"Yes?"

"Yes?"

"I shall have to whisper it...."

"I'll have to whisper this..."

The damsel, full of innocent curiosity, bent forward to listen. The odd-job man, congratulating himself on extraordinary cunning, bent forward and essayed a kiss of welcome. The intended recipient, however, seemed to be possessed of a sixth sense or instinct, for, when his lips were on the point of meeting hers, she drew back with a melodious cry of surprise. The kiss was too late to be checked, and unhappily was bestowed upon a bunch of privet.

The young woman, filled with innocent curiosity, leaned in to listen. The handyman, feeling clever and self-satisfied, leaned in and tried to give her a welcoming kiss. However, she seemed to have a sixth sense or instinct, because just as his lips were about to meet hers, she pulled back with a melodious gasp of surprise. The kiss was too late to stop, and unfortunately ended up landing on a bunch of privet.

The odd-job man mildly whispered the equivalent of "How very annoying!" and then remonstrated in a louder tone. He pointed out that he had not seen his visitor for a week, and that under the circumstances the least she could do, etc.

The handyman quietly murmured something like "How annoying!" and then complained more loudly. He mentioned that he hadn’t seen his visitor in a week, and that given the situation, the least she could do, etc.

"Ye ... es," agreed the damsel, parting the hedge once more, "it is true, all that you say. But you forget that you have not earned it yet."

"Yes," the young woman agreed, pushing aside the hedge again, "it's true, everything you're saying. But you forget that you haven't earned it yet."

"Holy Moses!" said the odd-job man, appealing to the heavens. "Here I chuck my job in London at a word—or, rather, a letter from you! I come down here got up as a laborer; I hang about the blessed village till I'm sick for the town and you again; I get taken on here to work—and, mind you, it is work, though I don't grumble at that. And it's all for to keep an eye on a chap I've never seen."

"Holy Moses!" said the handyman, looking up to the sky. "I quit my job in London at just a word—or, better yet, a letter from you! I come down here dressed as a laborer; I hang around the town until I’m fed up with it and miss you again; I get hired here to work—and trust me, it is work, though I don't complain about that. And it’s all just to keep an eye on a guy I've never even met."

"And not for me?"

"And not for me?"

"You silly chu—I beg your pardon, miss—that is, my dear! What I do mean is, who are you gettin' at? Of course, it's for you, and I'm going through with it. But I do think you might give me a bit of encouragement like, when you come at last——"

"You silly girl—I apologize, miss—that is, my dear! What I mean is, who are you aiming at? Of course, it's for you, and I'm going to see it through. But I do think you could give me a little encouragement when you finally come around——"

He paused; there was the sound of steps coming down the road, and he had no wish to be overheard courting. Thus drawn back to real life, conscience pricked him, and he wondered if there was any danger of Mrs. Peters reappearing. In a panic he looked over his shoulder.... No! the lawn was deserted: he still had time. But when he turned to the hedge he was surprised to see his love with her head pushed right through the privet, scarlet from excitement. A hand, too, appeared, enjoining caution and silence.

He paused; he could hear footsteps coming down the road, and he didn't want to be caught in a romantic moment. Brought back to reality, his conscience nagged at him, and he wondered if there was any chance Mrs. Peters would show up again. Panicking, he glanced over his shoulder... No! The lawn was empty: he still had a moment. But when he turned to the hedge, he was startled to see his love with her head stuck right through the privet, flushed with excitement. A hand also appeared, signaling caution and silence.

You must have recognized ere this that Brown, the odd-job man beneath the thrall of Mrs. Peters, was none other than Mr. Henry Brown, cab-proprietor, under different auspices. You will remember, then, the type of man he was but a few chapters ago, middle-aged, reserved, cautious and a little unenterprising. But you will not forget that love had made a change in his habits, outlook and élan. He was younger now, more alert, audacious and full of guile. So you must not be surprised that when he saw his lady beckoning, appealing to him to come closer, be careful, not talk, but observe—when he saw her head (and it was a very pretty head) framed in harmonious privet—when he saw this gift of fortune, you must not be surprised that he accepted it. He drew near and kissed her very quietly but very heartily. She, for some obscure reason wishing to remain unseen, did not dare to withdraw her head or box his ears. All she could do was to bite her lip and stamp her dainty heel, while she remained, ostrich-like, in the hedge.

You must have realized by now that Brown, the handyman under Mrs. Peters' control, was actually Mr. Henry Brown, the cab owner, in a different situation. You might remember what he was like just a few chapters ago—middle-aged, reserved, cautious, and a bit lackluster. But you can’t forget that love had transformed his habits, perspective, and energy. He was younger now, more alert, daring, and clever. So, you shouldn’t be surprised that when he saw his lady signaling for him to come closer, be careful, not speak, but watch—when he saw her head (and it was a very pretty head) framed by the neatly trimmed privet—when he saw this stroke of luck, you shouldn’t be shocked that he accepted it. He approached and kissed her softly but sincerely. She, for some mysterious reason wanting to stay hidden, didn’t dare to pull her head back or slap him. All she could do was bite her lip and stamp her delicate heel while she remained, like an ostrich, in the hedge.

The footsteps passed, but before they began to grow fainter Henry Brown repeated the salutation. "Couldn't help it!" he said meekly, answering the sparkle in her eyes. "You shouldn't tempt a man. Now, what's the row?"

The footsteps went by, but before they started to fade, Henry Brown echoed the greeting. "I couldn't help it!" he said softly, responding to the sparkle in her eyes. "You shouldn't tempt a guy. So, what's going on?"

She was too excited to rebuke him; the moment was too precious to be lost. "You see him?" she queried, pointing to the retreating figure of Lionel, who was on the road to The Quiet House. "Well, that is the man you are to watch! That is he from whom you are to recover the document!"

She was too excited to scold him; the moment was too precious to waste. "Do you see him?" she asked, pointing to Lionel's retreating figure as he walked toward The Quiet House. "Well, that's the guy you need to keep an eye on! That's the one you have to get the document from!"

"The deuce it is!" said Henry, gazing after Lionel with interest. "Well, he's big enough to give trouble...."

"The hell it is!" said Henry, watching Lionel with curiosity. "Well, he's big enough to cause some trouble...."

"You are not afraid?"

"Are you not afraid?"

"Not particularly," he said with a slow smile. "It's not a job I hanker after, but I've promised you to try, and I will try. You'll tell me, I dare say, what you think the best way of setting about it?"

"Not really," he said with a slow smile. "It's not a job I'm eager for, but I promised you I'd give it a shot, and I will. You'll let me know, I bet, what you think is the best way to go about it?"

"Of course. You are far too stupid to think for yourself. And now, good-by!"

"Of course. You're way too clueless to think for yourself. And now, goodbye!"

"I say, you're not going! And I had such a lot to talk about ... that wedding, for instance...."

"I’m telling you, you’re not going! And I had so much to talk about... like that wedding, for example..."

"What wedding?" She paused, chin in air.

"What wedding?" She paused, lifting her chin.

"Come! that's a good 'un. Ours."

"Come on! That's a good one. Ours."

"Pstt! the assurance of these male creatures!—As if I would marry a man who kisses me by force! No, Mr. Brown, do not count on that. Do what you have promised first, and then I will think about it. If I choose, well ... If I do not choose, well ... I promise nothing."

"Pstt! The confidence of these guys!—As if I would marry a man who forces a kiss on me! No, Mr. Brown, don’t expect that. Do what you’ve promised first, and then I’ll think about it. If I decide to, well ... If I don’t decide to, well ... I promise nothing."

"That's a poor sort of bargain."

"That's a terrible deal."

"It is no bargain: I do not bargain. I give an order. Good-by. Oh, I will write to you——"

"It’s not a deal: I don’t negotiate. I give an order. Goodbye. Oh, I’ll write to you——"

"Thank you—thank you——" he began.

"Thanks—thanks——" he began.

"To tell you what to do. I shall not be far, but you must not attempt to see me without my leave."

"To tell you what to do. I won’t be far away, but you must not try to see me without my permission."

She turned on her heel and marched down the road. The odd-job man whistled in amused dismay. "They're all alike," he muttered as he turned to his work again and met the vicar's wife. She was coming from the house and wore a severe expression.

She spun around and walked down the road. The handyman whistled in surprised amusement. "They're all the same," he grumbled as he returned to his work and saw the vicar's wife. She was coming from the house and had a stern look on her face.

"Did I hear you talking, Brown?"

"Did I hear you talking, Brown?"

"I can't say, ma'am," he answered stolidly. She frowned.

"I can't say, ma'am," he answered flatly. She frowned.

"Be good enough not to equivocate," she commanded. "Were you talking?"

"Be clear and straightforward," she commanded. "Were you talking?"

"I often talk aloud to myself," said Henry mildly. He was an honest man and did not take kindly to lies, even of the whitest. Mrs. Peters frowned again.

"I often talk out loud to myself," Henry said calmly. He was an honest man and didn't tolerate lies, even the smallest ones. Mrs. Peters frowned again.

"Indeed!" she said icily. "Do you mean to say you were not talking to a young woman through the hedge?"

"Really?" she said coldly. "Are you saying you weren't talking to a young woman through the hedge?"

"Yes, ma'am," said Henry, "I was. I suppose I'm allowed to rest for a minute now and then."

"Yes, ma'am," Henry said, "I was. I guess I'm allowed to take a break for a minute now and then."

"Rest is a very different thing from philandering. That I can not allow. It looks very bad from the road to see the vicarage servants gossiping or worse through the hedge. Remember, Brown, it must not happen again. I can not understand one of our village girls——"

"Rest is totally different from cheating. I can’t let that happen. It looks really bad for the vicarage staff to be gossiping, especially if someone sees it from the road or worse, through the hedge. Remember, Brown, it can’t happen again. I just don’t get what’s going on with one of our village girls——"

She paused interrogatively, but Henry was not so silly as to fall into the trap. He began to oil the machine, and even Mrs. Peters did not like to ask pointblank who his sweetheart was. Instead, she finished with a snap, "—making herself so cheap."

She paused, looking curious, but Henry wasn't so foolish as to take the bait. He started to oil the machine, and even Mrs. Peters didn't want to directly ask who his girlfriend was. Instead, she concluded sharply, "—making herself so cheap."

She went back to the house again. Henry straightened up and glared after her. "They're all alike!" he said again; but how he could include two such different people as Mrs. Peters and his adored in the same condemnation is hard to understand. The words of the sentence, it is true, were identical; but the inflection hinted at a great gulf fixed between the two offenders. Possibly they were charged with different offenses.

She went back into the house again. Henry stood up straight and glared after her. "They're all the same!" he said again; but it's hard to see how he could put two such different people like Mrs. Peters and his beloved in the same judgment. The words were the same, but the tone suggested a significant divide between the two offenders. Maybe they were guilty of different faults.

"They're all alike...." Are they? Does the same essential lurk beneath the surface? Supposing we could dissect Mrs. Peters, Alicia, Mizzi, Beatrice Blair, and a thousand Ermyntrudes or Sallies, should we find the same germ of woman? Take Lionel's evidence, if it were available. You might safely assert that to him Beatrice was different from and superior to any other woman you could produce. Henry Brown would as stoutly hold the same of his anonymous sweetheart. Mr. Peters and Mr. Hedderwick we may hope would take an identical line, or at least they would have once. But these are, or have been, lovers, the blindest of mortals, and their evidence is too partial to be trustworthy. A cynic like Pope would tell you that every woman is at heart a rake, and might find a score of others to support him. A Shaw might produce a monster like Ann Whitfield and brazenly say she was typical. A Chesterton would talk of women being sublime as individuals but horrible in a herd. A son might say that his mother was perfect, but he, too, would be partial. What is the truth about woman? Only a woman can say, and she would find it hard to take a detached view. Probably truth was partly expressed by the odd-job man in words—wholly expressed by his words and inflection. They are human and feminine if you probe deep enough, but there are variations, unimagined harmonies and discords for the seeker. "They're all alike"—with a difference, and no man can learn the whole truth from a text-book. The text-book can give him elementary rules which may serve him well, but he must be prepared to find plenty of exceptions. The student, however, need not fear monotony.

"They're all the same..." Are they? Is there something fundamentally similar beneath the surface? If we could break down Mrs. Peters, Alicia, Mizzi, Beatrice Blair, and a thousand Ermyntrudes or Sallies, would we find the same essence of woman? Consider Lionel's perspective, if he were available to provide it. You could confidently say that to him, Beatrice was different from and better than any other woman you could name. Henry Brown would just as firmly insist the same about his unnamed sweetheart. We can hope that Mr. Peters and Mr. Hedderwick would feel similarly, or at least they once did. But these are, or have been, lovers—the most blinded of individuals—and their opinions are too biased to be reliable. A cynic like Pope would claim that every woman is secretly a libertine and might find plenty of others to back him up. A Shaw might present a character like Ann Whitfield and shamelessly argue she represents all women. A Chesterton would suggest that women are wonderful as individuals but terrible in groups. A son might declare that his mother is flawless, but he would also be biased. What is the truth about women? Only a woman can provide that insight, and she would struggle to remain objective. The truth is probably partially captured by the odd-job man in his words—fully conveyed by how he says them. They are human and feminine if you dig deep enough, but there are variations, unexpected harmonies and disharmonies for those who seek. "They're all the same"—but with differences, and no man can discover the complete truth from a textbook. A textbook can give him basic guidelines that may be useful, but he must be ready to encounter many exceptions. However, the student need not worry about dullness.

But while we have been indulging in cheap philosophy Mr. Brown's sweetheart has got well down the road, following at a considerable distance the footsteps of Lionel. Evidently she is in a good humor with the world, for she hums an air that has a sprightly sound as of the boulevards or cabarets, and she stops to pick a wild rose. She is smiling at her thoughts—possibly at the lamentable lack of self-control exhibited by her lover, possibly at the remembrance of the grass still to be mown and neatly gathered. And as she is in a good humor, self-possessed, and the air is of the balmiest, is it wonderful that she should smile absently on a good-looking stranger sitting by the roadside, smoking a cigarette? Surely not, as the stranger is Tony Wild, who has left Mr. Hedderwick exhausted at The Happy Heart, while he strolls out to examine the lie of the land.

But while we've been caught up in cheap philosophy, Mr. Brown's girlfriend has made her way down the road, keeping a noticeable distance behind Lionel. She clearly seems to be in a good mood, humming a lively tune that feels reminiscent of the boulevards or cabarets, and she stops to pick a wild rose. She's smiling at her thoughts—maybe at her boyfriend's disappointing lack of self-control, or maybe at the memory of the grass that still needs to be mowed and neatly gathered. Since she's feeling good, composed, and the weather is lovely, is it any surprise that she smiles absentmindedly at a charming stranger sitting by the roadside, smoking a cigarette? Definitely not, since the stranger is Tony Wild, who has left Mr. Hedderwick worn out at The Happy Heart while he takes a stroll to check out the area.

"Good morning," says Tony courteously, raising his cap. He does not get up, for that might frighten her away. "Can you tell me which is the road to Hetton-le-Hole? Forgive me asking, but...."

"Good morning," Tony says politely, tipping his cap. He stays seated because he doesn't want to scare her off. "Can you tell me the way to Hetton-le-Hole? Sorry to ask, but...."

"I have never heard of it," says the lady, with a smile that shows she penetrates Tony's elementary artifice. "I am sorry.... Good morning."

"I've never heard of it," the lady says, smiling as if she sees right through Tony's simple trick. "I'm sorry.... Good morning."

Tony deliberately flicks the ash from his cigarette.

Tony deliberately flicks the ash from his cigarette.

"What a bore!" he observes with a fluent laziness in his voice, and of course the lady can not continue her progress while he is speaking. It would look so prudish. "I was awfully keen on seeing Hetton-le-Hole, but nobody here seems to know the road, so I suppose I shall have to give up the idea. I say, don't you find life rather a bore?" It was an abrupt change of subject, but there seemed no inconsequence as the words dropped idly from his lips. He appeared to be talking at random for an obvious purpose, but with an unaffected sincerity. "Nothing to do, I mean, and not a vast amount to see. One day following another, and so forth, you know...."

"What a drag!" he notes with a casual slouch in his voice, and of course, the lady can't keep moving while he's talking. That would seem so uptight. "I was really excited to see Hetton-le-Hole, but no one here seems to know the way, so I guess I'll have to give up on that. I mean, don't you find life pretty boring?" It was a sudden shift in topic, but the words flowed easily from his mouth. He seemed to be speaking without much thought for a clear reason, yet with genuine sincerity. "Nothing to do, you know, and not much to see. Just one day after another, and so on, you know...."

"Heavens, no!" replied the lady with an amused contempt. "There is so much to see—to ask—to think about! What can a young man like you think of himself if he is bored at ... at twenty-six?"

"Heavens, no!" replied the lady with an amused contempt. "There's so much to see—to ask—to think about! What can a young man like you think of himself if he's bored at ... at twenty-six?"

"Good shot!" said Tony. "I say, please forgive me being so forward and pushing and all that, and do sit down and talk to me. I should be tremendously gratified, and I'd do my best to amuse you."

"Nice shot!" said Tony. "I apologize for being so forward and pushy, but please sit down and chat with me. I’d really appreciate it, and I’ll do my best to keep you entertained."

"I have stayed too long already," she said with a crisp note of rebuke. "I have neither the time nor the wish to stop and relieve the tedium of bored strangers. I hope you will soon find the road you speak of."

"I've been here too long already," she said with a sharp tone of disapproval. "I don’t have the time or the desire to pause and entertain bored strangers. I hope you find the road you mentioned soon."

She turned and went on her way. Tony smiled good-naturedly; really, she had been quite lenient, though he had hardly deserved all she said and implied. She was more than pretty and was evidently no fool. A lady? N—no ... but ... was it worth following up? Should he try to engineer a small flirtation or be content with the fair promises held out by Mr. Hedderwick? N ... no ... Yes! She had spurned his lightly-proffered homage to her charms, and amour propre would not allow him to give in without a struggle. He was only too willing in most things to step aside of his own free will—things so soon lost their interest; but to be forced to play the part of rejected spectator, that could not be permitted. His eyes followed her smilingly. "I bet she turns and waves!" thought the despicable Tony. "She's a charming lady's maid who likes fun, respects herself, and means to be treated with correctness—when she chooses. She will turn and wave before reaching that bend in the road. And I will be stand-offish and refuse to reply. A perfect cause of offense, with a delightful misunderstanding to follow. But, I shall follow her secretly along the hedge and find out where she lives. Admirable!"

She turned and went on her way. Tony smiled good-naturedly; honestly, she had been quite lenient, even though he didn’t really deserve all she said and implied. She was more than pretty and was clearly no fool. A lady? No... but... was it worth pursuing? Should he try to spark a little flirtation or be satisfied with the promising opportunities Mr. Hedderwick offered? No... no... Yes! She had brushed off his light-hearted compliment about her looks, and his pride wouldn’t let him give in without a fight. He was usually happy to step back voluntarily—things lost their interest so quickly; but being forced to play the role of a rejected onlooker was unacceptable. His eyes followed her with a smile. "I bet she turns around and waves!" thought the despicable Tony. "She’s a charming lady’s maid who enjoys having fun, respects herself, and expects to be treated properly—when she decides. She’ll turn and wave before she gets to that bend in the road. And I will be aloof and refuse to respond. A perfect offense, with a delightful misunderstanding to follow. But, I will follow her secretly along the hedge and find out where she lives. Brilliant!"

She had gone some little distance, but still did not turn round. Worshipers of beauty, modesty, good feeling and decorous behavior, rejoice! She did not turn round! Her gay svelte figure marched bravely along, virginal defiance in her shoulders and the swing of her tailor-made skirt. The fragments of a gallant whistle floated back to Tony, and he murmured "Bravado!" with an uneasy doubt. The curve of the road was close at hand now: a few more yards would carry her past in triumph, and the sex be vindicated. Tony was in painful agitation, for his knowledge of woman and powers of swift diagnosis were at stake. Three yards were left—two—hope seemed dead. Then, alas! she stopped and a smile crept to his lips. But she did not turn round—there is still a loophole for the sex,—she did not turn round! All she did was to open her reticule and take her handkerchief from it. As the handkerchief was withdrawn a bit of pasteboard was caught in its folds and fell—unnoticed?—on the road. Tony waited with vast contentment until she had turned the corner. Then with a light heart he followed and picked up the card. He read the inscription with amused curiosity. It was, "Miss Arkwright, The Quiet House."

She had walked quite a distance but still didn’t look back. Fans of beauty, modesty, good manners, and proper behavior, rejoice! She didn’t turn around! Her stylish figure moved confidently forward, with a sense of innocence in her posture and the sway of her tailored skirt. The echo of a cheerful whistle reached Tony, and he muttered "Bravado!" with lingering uncertainty. The bend in the road was close now: just a few more steps and she would pass by triumphantly, proving something for her gender. Tony was in distress, as his understanding of women and his quick judgment were on the line. Three yards left—two—hope seemed lost. Then, unfortunately, she paused and a smile came to his face. But she didn’t turn around—there was still a chance for his gender—she didn’t turn around! All she did was reach into her bag and pull out her handkerchief. As she took it out, a piece of cardboard got caught in it and fell—was it unnoticed?—on the road. Tony waited with great satisfaction until she turned the corner. Then, feeling light-hearted, he followed and picked up the card. He read the name with amused curiosity. It read, "Miss Arkwright, The Quiet House."


CHAPTER XIII

RATHER STAGY

After Beatrice had bidden Lionel good-by in the early dawn she did the most sensible thing possible: she went to bed. But it is one thing to go to bed and another to go to sleep, as many a sufferer—from insomnia, love, indigestion, or kindred ailments—has found to his cost. You feel weary, oppressed with the want of sleep, let us say, yawnsome—in a word, ready to drop off the moment you are between the sheets. But, if a white night be inscribed in the book of Fate, how changed the mood as soon as the light is out! At once, almost, you lose that sense of impending slumber and become wide awake, clear-eyed and keen of brain. Something occurs to interest your mind and you meditate perspicaciously thereon. Another thought succeeds, and another, and you grow more wakeful every moment. Soon you begin to say, "I must go to sleep now," and resolutely try to refuse to think. But resolution is vain before insomnia. Eyelids may be tightly shut, but the masked eyeballs still peer vigilantly into the void: hands may clench themselves in the hopeless effort to compose the will and induce the wished-for slumber: the alert body may strive to cheat itself by observing the accustomed ritual—first on the right side, then left, then right again—in the expectation of influencing mind by matter: droves of sheep may be counted passing through innumerable gates—poems recited till the very thought of verse revolts—numerals repeated by the ticking brain—but still you are far from the haven. It seems that

After Beatrice said goodbye to Lionel in the early dawn, she did the most sensible thing: she went to bed. But going to bed and actually falling asleep are two different things, as many people suffering from insomnia, love, indigestion, or similar issues know all too well. You feel tired, burdened by a lack of sleep—let's say, yawning a lot—in other words, ready to drift off as soon as you’re under the covers. But if destiny has a sleepless night in store, your mood changes the moment the lights go out! Almost immediately, you lose that feeling of impending sleep and find yourself wide awake, alert, and sharp-minded. Thoughts start to pop up, capturing your interest, and you reflect deeply on them. Another thought follows, and then another, and you become more awake with each passing moment. Soon you find yourself saying, "I need to sleep now," and you resolutely try to stop thinking. But determination is useless against insomnia. Your eyelids may be tightly closed, but your masked eyes still peer intently into the darkness; your hands may clench in a futile effort to steady your will and invite the desired sleep. Your active body might try to trick itself by following the usual routine—first lying on your right side, then on your left, then back to your right—hoping to influence your mind through your body. You might even count countless sheep passing through gates, recite poems until the mere thought of verse becomes annoying, repeat numbers as your mind ticks away—but still, you are far from tranquility. It seems that

"Not poppy, nor mandragora,
"Not poppy, nor mandrake,
Nor all the drowsy syrups of the world"
"Not all the sleepy syrups in the world"

could bestow the most blessed of all boons. And at last you give up the unequal struggle and try to make the best of it.

could grant the greatest of all blessings. And finally, you surrender the unequal fight and try to make the most of it.

Failing drugs—and one has to be a smart society lady, a broken man or woman, for them—there are various palliatives. You may turn on the light and read till sleep comes with soothing fingers upon tired brows. Or, if young and enterprising, you can go for a walk and see the dawn. Or sometimes an impromptu bedroom picnic—bread and cheese and a bottle of beer raided thief-wise from the pantry, taking great care not to let the stairs creak and alarm the house—may have excellent results. These, and a score of similar expedients, may be recommended with assurance to the patient. And if they fail, at least they have passed an hour or so more pleasantly than in mere acquiescence.

Failing drugs—and you really have to be a savvy socialite or a broken man or woman to rely on them—there are various alternatives. You could turn on a light and read until sleep comes gently to your tired mind. Or, if you’re young and adventurous, you can take a walk to enjoy the sunrise. Sometimes, an impromptu bedroom picnic—snatching some bread, cheese, and a bottle of beer from the pantry, making sure not to let the stairs creak and wake anyone—can have amazing effects. These options, along with many others like them, can be confidently suggested to anyone in need. And if they don’t work, at least you've spent some time in a more enjoyable way than just giving in to despair.

Beatrice lay awake, sorely against her will. She knew that sleep was what she needed, and would need still more within some fourteen hours. The strain of acting, followed by her preposterous adventure at the magnanimous churchwarden's, had used up more of her nervous resources than was desirable. Sleep was therefore the obvious thing. But alas! it proved the impossible thing, too, and she lay restless, aglow with thought, waiting impatiently for what she knew would not come.

Beatrice lay awake, completely against her will. She knew she needed sleep, and would need even more in about fourteen hours. The stress of performing, combined with her ridiculous experience at the generous churchwarden's, had drained her nerves more than was healthy. Sleep was clearly what she needed. But unfortunately, it turned out to be impossible, and she lay there restless, filled with thoughts, waiting impatiently for what she knew wouldn't come.

What did she think of during those hours of frenzied vision? Was it of Lukos, waiting in an eastern prison for the news that would set him free to join her? Was it her dead son, the little boy she had spoken of to Lionel? Or Turkey, the land of her adoption, struggling for freedom, enmeshed with perils, the slave of diplomatic and selfish adventures? Her art—had it a place within those weary wheels of thought; her success on the stage, the triumphs of the footlights—illusory, but so real in seeming, so satisfying and complete? Or Lionel—did he whip her straining fancies to a wilder effort toward the goal? Something of all these may have engaged her, for each was inextricably interwoven with the others. Lukos—Lionel—the sultan—Mizza—the Hedderwicks—the ambassador—a hundred minor characters, "supers" in the drama of her life, wheeled hither and thither, mocking, defying, questioning. The horrible lines of Wilde burned in letters of fire upon the wall:

What was she thinking about during those hours of intense vision? Was it Lukos, waiting in an eastern prison for the news that would set him free to join her? Was it her deceased son, the little boy she had talked about to Lionel? Or Turkey, the country she had come to call home, struggling for freedom, caught up in dangers, a victim of political and selfish ambitions? Her art—did it play a role in those tired thoughts; her success on stage, the victories of the spotlight—illusory, yet so convincing, so fulfilling and complete? Or was it Lionel—did he push her restless thoughts to strive harder for her goals? She might have been engaged by a bit of all these, since each was tightly connected to the others. Lukos—Lionel—the sultan—Mizza—the Hedderwicks—the ambassador—a hundred minor characters, background actors in the drama of her life, moved around her, mocking, challenging, questioning. The terrible lines of Wilde burned in letters of fire on the wall:

"Slim shadows hand in hand:
"Slim shadows holding hands:
About, about, in ghostly rout
About, about, in ghostly chaos
They trod a saraband:
They danced a saraband:
And the damned grotesques made arabesques,
And the damn grotesques created arabesques,
Like the wind upon the sand."
"Like the wind on the sand."

Each must have had his place in the drama, but the important question was, who played the lead? Lukos or Lionel—honor and faith or ... inclination? Yet that is hardly a fair way of putting it: she must not define her interest as inclination, hinting at something more potent. Interest one may admit without qualification: Lionel had saved her life, was an attractive and pleasant young man, and had been her guest for a week. Of course Beatrice was interested; she would have been hard or inhuman otherwise. But did her inclination show signs of becoming something more? Could she honestly say in the stereotyped phrase that "he was nothing to her?"—nothing being the antithesis of everything. In that sense she could say it, for he was certainly not everything. But was "nothing" exact? Ah!...

Each must have had his role in the story, but the key question was, who took the lead? Lukos or Lionel—honor and faith or ... desire? Yet that's not quite fair to put it that way: she needed to avoid labeling her interest as mere desire, hinting at something stronger. Interest can be acknowledged without reservation: Lionel had saved her life, was a charming and pleasant young man, and had been her guest for a week. Of course, Beatrice was interested; she would have been cold or unfeeling otherwise. But was her interest showing signs of becoming something deeper? Could she genuinely say in the usual way that "he was nothing to her?"—nothing being the opposite of everything. In that sense, she could claim it, since he was definitely not everything. But was "nothing" accurate? Ah!...

At least she must have found comfort in the reflection that she had sent him away on an errand that would avert all danger, if successfully carried out. She had been ... weak ... once or twice, but such a weakness may find a ready forgiveness, considering the circumstances and the expiation. Which of us, oh, censorious reader, would have been as strong as Beatrice?

At least she must have found comfort in knowing that she had sent him on a mission that would keep him safe, if it went well. She had been ... vulnerable ... once or twice, but that kind of vulnerability is often easily forgiven, given the situation and the redemption. Which one of us, oh, judgmental reader, would have been as strong as Beatrice?

Still, she could not sleep, and for the present that outweighed all moral hesitations and scruples. At seven o'clock she gave up the unequal contest, dressed and went out for a short walk. The air calmed her, and she gained a respite from the self-examination for an hour. Then, after making an effort to eat some breakfast, she sat down to smoke a cigarette and think again about Lionel. What was he like, the real man, the true Lionel? Was he a man to be trusted, a man to be relied on, the sort of man, so to speak, one would like (supposing it were possible) to marry? Lionel as a husband.... "Husband" brought a smile, a blush and a frown to the face of Beatrice, and it is to be hoped that the shade of Lukos noticed the blush as well as the smile. "Heavens! and I have only known him a week!" thought Beatrice with self-chastisement: "besides ..." Precisely! There are so many "besideses" in real life.

Still, she couldn't sleep, and for now, that outweighed all her moral doubts and concerns. At seven o'clock, she surrendered to the losing battle, got dressed, and went out for a short walk. The fresh air calmed her, giving her a break from all the self-reflection for an hour. Then, after trying to eat some breakfast, she sat down to smoke a cigarette and think about Lionel again. What was he really like, the true Lionel? Was he someone you could trust, someone you could count on, the kind of guy one would want (if it were possible) to marry? Lionel as a husband... The word "husband" brought a smile, a blush, and a frown to Beatrice's face, and hopefully, the spirit of Lukos noticed both the blush and the smile. "Goodness! And I've only known him for a week!" Beatrice thought with a sense of self-discipline: "Besides..." Exactly! There are so many "besides" in real life.

But undoubtedly, and without any disloyalty to shades, living or otherwise, he was the dearest of boys. He had behaved extraordinarily well throughout—extraordinarily well, for actresses have unique opportunities of studying man's weakness—not only in the cab and the dressing-room, but during the week of voluntary imprisonment. Polished, controlled, devoted without being tiresome, he was certainly the dearest of boys. Human, too, and humanity was a quality that appealed to Beatrice; nor did he lack a sense of humor and romance. But she had only known him for a week, and could she possibly form an adequate judgment in such a period? "He may be acting all the time," she thought with a dismal pucker of the forehead, "and I ought to know how easy it can be to act. What a fool I am to worry over things!"

But without a doubt, and without being unfaithful to any feelings, he was the sweetest boy. He had been incredibly well-behaved the whole time—truly remarkable, since actresses have special chances to see a man's weaknesses—not just in the cab and the dressing room, but also during the week of being stuck together. Refined, composed, and devoted without being annoying, he definitely was the sweetest boy. He was human, too, and that was a quality that Beatrice found appealing; he also had a sense of humor and a romantic side. But she had only known him for a week, and could she really make a good judgment in such a short time? "He might be acting the whole time," she thought with a frown, "and I should know how easy it is to pretend. What an idiot I am to worry about this!"

She threw away the half-smoked cigarette with a petulant gesture and continued to worry. The remembrance of Mizzi flashed across her mind—her prettiness and Lionel's evasive declarations. These had been glib enough, no doubt, but glibness and dexterity were not sufficient to lull the suspicions of Beatrice. "He is a man," she argued angrily, perversely pleased in lashing her apprehensions, "and a bachelor. What else could one expect? Of course, he may not have kissed her, but.... If he has, well ... what right have I to...."

She tossed aside the half-smoked cigarette in an annoyed manner and kept worrying. The memory of Mizzi flashed in her mind—her beauty and Lionel's vague comments. They were definitely slick enough, but charm and skill weren’t enough to silence Beatrice's suspicions. "He’s a guy," she argued angrily, almost enjoying the way it fed her worries, "and a bachelor. What else would you expect? Sure, he might not have kissed her, but.... If he has, well ... what right do I have to...."

Her petulance increased with every moment, and when the bell rang about ten o'clock she felt more like a naughty ill-tempered child than anything else. Remembering that now she had no maid, she controlled herself and opened the door. Her face cleared, for on the threshold stood a man she liked, her manager.

Her irritation grew with each passing moment, and when the bell rang around ten o'clock, she felt more like a spoiled, cranky child than anything else. Remembering that she had no maid now, she composed herself and opened the door. Her expression brightened when she saw a man she liked standing on the threshold, her manager.

"Hullo, Ashford!" she said. "Come in! I'm glad you've come, for I'm bored to tears."

"Helloo, Ashford!" she said. "Come in! I'm really glad you're here because I'm so bored."

Ashford Billing, a smartly-dressed man of thirty-six, entered. One would hardly have guessed him to be connected with the stage, for he had a mustache, was well-groomed without over-emphasizing the fact, and had a pleasant look of self-reliance without swagger. He was tall and lean, as if he was accustomed to keep himself in hard condition, and though an American you could scarcely have guessed it from his speech. Four years in England, during which time he had studied to erase transatlantic idioms and intonations with a view of playing on the stage, had been crowned with almost complete success. Only a stray word, a phrase occasionally, showed that he was not a native-born.

Ashford Billing, a sharply dressed 36-year-old man, walked in. You wouldn’t have guessed he was connected to the theater; he had a mustache, was well-groomed without trying too hard, and had an approachable look of confidence without being cocky. He was tall and slim, as if he was used to keeping himself in shape, and even though he was American, you could hardly tell from his accent. He had spent four years in England, during which he worked hard to eliminate American idioms and speech patterns for his acting career, and he had almost completely succeeded. Only an occasional stray word or phrase revealed that he wasn’t a native.

"It's an early call, Miss Blair," he said pleasantly as he followed her into the sitting-room. "Partly business and partly pleasure. Which will you have first?"

"It's an early call, Miss Blair," he said with a smile as he followed her into the living room. "It's a mix of business and pleasure. Which do you want to tackle first?"

"Oh, pleasure," answered Beatrice carelessly: "I'm tired of business. Will you smoke?"

"Oh, pleasure," Beatrice replied casually. "I'm tired of work. Do you want to smoke?"

"No, thank you. Well, I'll plunge into the pleasure right away, though there's some business in it, too. You know I'm not the man to beat about the bush, so I'll ask you straight out if you're still in the same mind as you were six months ago?"

"No, thank you. Well, I’ll dive into the pleasure right away, although there’s some business in it, too. You know I'm not the type to beat around the bush, so I’ll ask you directly if you’re still thinking the same way you were six months ago?"

Beatrice made an irritated movement of her shoulders.

Beatrice shrugged, feeling irritated.

"Oh, bother!" she answered. "Fancy calling at this hour to ask me that!"

"Oh, come on!" she replied. "Can you believe you're calling me at this hour to ask that?"

"Sorry," said Ashford Billing. He did not appear at all excited, though his eyes gleamed. "My time's hardly my own just now—working day and night over the new production, provincial tours and syndicates. And you never seem to be at home at reasonable hours—I called twice last week, but Mizzi said you were out."

"Sorry," said Ashford Billing. He didn't seem excited at all, even though his eyes sparkled. "I can hardly find time for myself right now—I'm working day and night on the new production, provincial tours, and syndicates. And you never seem to be home at decent hours—I called twice last week, but Mizzi said you were out."

Beatrice blushed, and turned to the window to hide the blush. She remembered her instructions to Mizzi.

Beatrice blushed and turned to the window to hide her face. She recalled her instructions to Mizzi.

"So I thought I'd come now on the off chance," continued Billing. "Dear Miss Blair, I may not appear romantic or in earnest, but I am. I'm a plain man and want to marry you. You refused me once, but I don't like giving up altogether. Is it any good?"

"So I thought I'd drop by now just in case," continued Billing. "Dear Miss Blair, I might not seem romantic or serious, but I really am. I'm an ordinary guy and I want to marry you. You turned me down once, but I’m not the type to give up easily. Is it worth a shot?"

"Not a bit," said Beatrice decisively. "Sorry, Ashford: I like you awfully, but not that way. So you must take that as final."

"Not at all," Beatrice said firmly. "Sorry, Ashford: I really like you, but not like that. So you have to take that as the final word."

"I will for the present," he answered, looking gloomy for a moment. Then he brightened up. "But at the risk of offending I warn you that I mean to ask you again later on, in case you change your mind. In the American dictionary there's no such word as 'impossible.'"

"I'll hold off for now," he replied, looking a bit down for a moment. Then he perked up. "But just so you know, I plan to ask you again later, in case you change your mind. In the American dictionary, there's no word 'impossible.'"

Beatrice was roused at this.

Beatrice was awakened by this.

"Look here, Ashford!" she said, biting her lip, "don't you talk to me like that! It's no good, and I won't have it! You'll make me lose my temper in a minute. I've never encouraged you, though I've always been fond of you in a friendly way."

"Listen up, Ashford!" she said, biting her lip, "don't talk to me like that! It’s not going to work, and I won’t accept it! You’re going to make me lose my cool any second now. I’ve never encouraged you, but I've always liked you in a friendly way."

"Then still there may——"

"Then there might still——"

"You've as much chance," said Beatrice, with flashing eyes, "as a bob-tailed dog in fly time! There's one of your own Americanisms for you, and I hope you like it!"

"You've got about as much chance," Beatrice said, her eyes blazing, "as a bobtail dog during fly season! There's one of your own American expressions for you, and I hope you like it!"

Ashford Billing could not help laughing, though Beatrice seemed in a thoroughly bad temper.

Ashford Billing couldn't help but laugh, even though Beatrice appeared to be in a really bad mood.

"Say, that's fierce!" he said, relapsing. "Where did you hear that?" Then he became graver. "But I won't worry you any more. I'm sorry ... but I guess I'll study to improve my manners."

"Wow, that's intense!" he said, slipping back. "Where did you hear that?" Then he got more serious. "But I won't bother you anymore. I'm sorry... but I guess I'll work on my manners."

"Let's get to business," said Beatrice, sitting down. "I'm tired to death of this. What is it you want?"

"Let's get to it," Beatrice said as she sat down. "I'm completely fed up with this. What do you want?"

"Well," he said, following her example, "I came here for two things. The first was to ask you to be my—oh, yes! good enough! I know that's a back number now. For the present, anyway. If that didn't materialize I wanted to know if you'd care to tour the provinces in A False Step. You know we close down in a week, and I'm going to start the tour—number one towns only—in the autumn."

"Well," he said, following her lead, "I came here for two things. The first was to ask you to be my—oh, yes! Forget that! I know that's old news now. At least for now. If that doesn't happen, I wanted to see if you'd like to tour the provinces in A False Step. You know we're wrapping up in a week, and I plan to start the tour—only in the top cities—in the fall."

Beatrice shook her head.

Beatrice shrugged.

"No; I'm going to take a rest."

"No; I'm going to take a break."

"You'll have lots of time to take a rest before the tour starts. Why not——"

"You'll have plenty of time to rest before the tour begins. Why not——"

"Look here, Ashford! You seem to think that I don't know my own mind in anything. I've already refused your offer for a London shop, and I don't mean to think about the provinces. See? I won't be worried any more—I'm——"

"Look here, Ashford! You seem to think I don't know my own mind about anything. I've already turned down your offer for a shop in London, and I have no intention of considering the provinces. Got it? I won't be bothered any longer—I'm——"

She paused and suddenly burst into tears, hiding her face in her hands. Ashford Billing, long accustomed to the vagaries of leading ladies and hardened in a rough school, was completely taken aback. He had known Beatrice for a fine actress and a finer woman—a woman who had charm, good looks and character. To see her break down for no apparent reason was not merely distressing—it was a shock.

She paused and suddenly started crying, burying her face in her hands. Ashford Billing, who was used to the unpredictable nature of leading ladies and had toughened up from a rough background, was completely caught off guard. He had always seen Beatrice as a talented actress and an even better woman—a woman with charm, good looks, and strength of character. Watching her lose it for no obvious reason was not just upsetting—it was a shock.

"Say, little girl," he said kindly—and there was no hint of disrespect, though on other occasions he was scrupulous in his use of "Miss Blair"—"I'm real sorry. I didn't know you'd feel bad about it. What's the trouble? Can I be of any help?"

"Hey, little girl," he said kindly—there was no hint of disrespect, even though he usually carefully said "Miss Blair"—"I'm really sorry. I didn't know this would upset you. What's wrong? Can I help in any way?"

Beatrice recovered herself, feeling extremely ashamed.

Beatrice collected herself, feeling very embarrassed.

"It's only nerves," she replied, drying her eyes with vicious dabs. "I didn't sleep last night. That's all. Give me a cigarette."

"It's just nerves," she said, wiping her eyes harshly. "I didn't sleep at all last night. That's it. Hand me a cigarette."

Billing opened his case and gave her one, looking gravely at her. There was something behind this, he thought, but what it was he could not guess.

Billing opened his case and handed her one, looking seriously at her. There was something more to this, he thought, but he couldn't figure out what it was.

"I won't worry you any more," he said quietly. "I'd have liked to book you for that tour, but I guess you know best. You've had a tiring season—long runs are the very deuce, though they pay the manager. You take that rest you talk of and make it a good one. But let me know when you feel like getting to work again."

"I won't bother you anymore," he said softly. "I would have liked to book you for that tour, but I guess you know what's best. It's been a tough season for you—long runs are really exhausting, even if they pay off for the manager. Take that rest you mentioned and make sure it's a good one. Just let me know when you're ready to get back to work."

"Thanks, Ashford," said Beatrice, smoking quickly. "You're a good sort. But, honestly, I'm thinking of giving up the stage altogether. I'm getting sick of it."

"Thanks, Ashford," Beatrice said, taking a quick puff of her cigarette. "You're a great person. But, to be honest, I’m considering quitting the stage completely. I’m getting tired of it."

Billing, who had had the kudos of giving Beatrice her first chance, felt his heart sink. But, realizing that this was not the time to urge mature reflection, he held his peace. Beatrice talked idly a few minutes, trying to appear natural, but the effort was great.

Billing, who had the honor of giving Beatrice her first opportunity, felt his heart sink. But, knowing this wasn’t the moment for deep thoughts, he kept quiet. Beatrice chatted casually for a few minutes, trying to seem at ease, but the effort was intense.

"Where are you going for a holiday?" she asked.

"Where are you going for vacation?" she asked.

"Flying," he answered. "Across the channel, perhaps. I've never done it yet."

"Flying," he replied. "Maybe across the channel. I haven't done it yet."

"What a queer boy you are," she said, looking at him fixedly. "What on earth made you take to the aeroplane?"

"What a strange boy you are," she said, looking at him intently. "What on earth made you take up flying?"

"Why on earth did I take to the sky?" he laughed. "I did it to advertise my first production over here. It was the right goods, too, for every one talked about the actor-manager-air-man. When I found how exciting it was, I couldn't stop. That's all."

"Why on earth did I take to the skies?" he laughed. "I did it to promote my first show over here. It was the perfect material, too, because everyone was talking about the actor-manager-flyer. Once I realized how thrilling it was, I couldn't stop. That's all."

"You're odd creatures, you men," said Beatrice, musing. "I should have thought that managing theaters was exciting enough."

"You're strange beings, you men," Beatrice said, deep in thought. "I would have thought that running theaters was thrilling enough."

"Change of excitement—just like falling in love with a new sweetheart," he smiled.

"Change of excitement—just like falling in love with a new crush," he smiled.

"Ah! that sounds like a man! Tell me, Ashford, do all men run after every pretty face they see?"

"Ah! that sounds like a guy! Tell me, Ashford, do all guys chase after every pretty face they see?"

"You want me to give away trade secrets, eh? Well, I suppose most men do ... until they're hooked."

"You want me to spill the trade secrets, huh? I guess that's what most guys want ... until they’re caught."

"Ashford! Hooked! How loathsome!"

"Ashford! Hooked! How disgusting!"

"I beg your pardon ... I was thinking as a cynical bachelor. What I mean is that I suppose most men swear off the pursuit once they've promised."

"I’m sorry ... I was thinking like a jaded bachelor. What I mean is that I guess most men give up on the chase once they’ve made a promise."

"And never relapse?"

"And never go back?"

He shrugged his shoulders.

He shrugged.

"The decent ones don't, but even they sometimes have a bit of a struggle. Take an extreme case: suppose a decent chap gets engaged, and force of circumstances keeps him apart from his divinity for ... years...."

"The good ones don’t, but even they sometimes face a bit of a struggle. Take an extreme example: imagine a decent guy gets engaged, and due to circumstances, he’s separated from his partner for ... years...."

"He ought to feel bound in honor not even to think of another!" flashed Beatrice.

"He should feel obligated, out of honor, not even to consider anyone else!" Beatrice exclaimed.

Billing sighed.

Billing let out a sigh.

"He ought, but he's up against a tough proposition. At least, the decent one tries...."

"He should, but he's facing a tough challenge. At least the good ones try...."

"Men are horrible," she said wearily.

"Men are terrible," she said wearily.

"Pretty horrible," he agreed, "but there's an amazing lot of unseen goodness hidden in the dirt.... Men aren't so bad ... some men. But we're getting too serious. I must be off. It's been a bad morning's work for me." He smiled—not very whole-heartedly, but still he smiled. "You refuse both my offers. But you'll let me know if I can ever do anything, won't you? That's merely friendly."

"Pretty terrible," he agreed, "but there's a surprising amount of hidden goodness in the dirt.... People aren't so bad ... some people. But we're getting too deep. I should get going. It's been a rough morning for me." He smiled—not very genuinely, but still he smiled. "You turned down both my offers. But you'll let me know if I can help with anything, right? That's just being friendly."

Beatrice did not smile, but she looked appreciatively at him.

Beatrice didn't smile, but she looked at him with appreciation.

"Thanks, Ashford," she said. "Yes; I've just remembered one thing you can do. Read a play by a friend of mine."

"Thanks, Ashford," she said. "Yes, I just remembered something you can do. Read a play by a friend of mine."

He groaned in comic despair.

He groaned in ironic despair.

"All right!" he said, "but don't make me promise to produce it. Remember this is my living!"

"Fine!" he said, "but don't make me guarantee it. Just keep in mind this is how I earn a living!"

"No; I only want you to read it. If it's bad, say so like a man: don't put the poor wretch off with the usual sugary criticism. And don't let it lie for months with all the rest of the lumber. You managers are cruel to authors, and you've had this one lying idle a long time."

"No; I just want you to read it. If it's bad, be honest about it: don't spare the feelings of the poor soul with the typical soft criticism. And don't leave it sitting for months with everything else collecting dust. You managers are unfair to authors, and you've had this one waiting around for a long time."

He did not deny the charge, save by a smile.

He didn’t deny the accusation, just smiled.

"I'll read it this week, sure," he said. "What's it called, and who's the author?"

"I'll read it this week, for sure," he said. "What's it called, and who wrote it?"

"I forget the name of the play. The author is a Mr. Mortimer."

"I can't remember the name of the play. The author is a Mr. Mortimer."

She said the name quite easily and without a blush, but Billing on the instant thought, "Who the devil is he? And what does she want to push his play for?" But he did not allow his face even to hint at surprise. He just held out his hand and said good-by, as naturally as if he had not been rejected without any hope of a future recantation. For though he professed optimism, in his heart he felt that Beatrice was not for him, and the knowledge hurt.

She said the name casually and without a hint of embarrassment, but Billing instantly thought, "Who the hell is he? And why is she trying to promote his play?" However, he didn’t let his face show any surprise. He simply extended his hand and said goodbye, as if he hadn’t just been rejected without any chance of a reversal. Although he acted optimistic, deep down he knew that Beatrice wasn't meant for him, and that realization stung.

"Good-by," he said cheerily. "Mind you have a good holiday, and come back to work soon."

"Goodbye," he said cheerfully. "Make sure you have a great holiday, and come back to work soon."

"Good-by, Ashford," she said, trying to keep back some unnecessary tears. She had known him for some time and guessed what he was thinking. He, she was sure, was at least one of the men who tried. "You're a good sort. Good-by."

"Goodbye, Ashford," she said, trying to hold back some unnecessary tears. She had known him for a while and could guess what he was thinking. She was sure he was at least one of the guys who tried. "You're a great guy. Goodbye."

Then she telephoned to a garage: "I want my car at two o'clock!"

Then she called a garage: "I want my car at two o'clock!"


CHAPTER XIV

A RISE IN THE WORLD

The Happy Heart was an ideal resting-place for a tired man, whether town or country-bred. To the former it made the stronger appeal, for there could be no greater contrast than between The Happy Heart and the flaring brazen public-houses which offer solace to the dwellers of the pavement. These attract by their fierce pledges of light, warmth and the stimulated oblivion of the moment; The Happy Heart draws the heart-strings alike of the physically tired and mentally jaded. Apart from the promise of good liquor—and all who go to Shereling can rely on the promise being fulfilled—it makes an esthetic appeal. For it is still an old-fashioned country tavern of the prettiest type, destined to make even the total abstainer wonder whether he be so absolutely in the right after all. It boasts a porch, over which a Virginia creeper spreads its amorous leaves; rose-bushes waft a welcome and the sure hope of peace to plowman or golfer after the day's striving. A meditative cow, apparently an artistic fixture, chews the cud in a field hard by from day to day. Smoke curls lazily from a huge and ancient chimney, as much as to say, "Be of good cheer! I come from the kitchen!" And there is, too, one of those signposts you see sometimes in the south,—a pillar placed separate from the inn itself with a swinging board above. The superscription, by the way, was due to the fancy of the squire's wife. When the squire entered into his inheritance and married he had had dreams. He wished to be like Dogberry and have everything handsome about him. His wife, a pretty imaginative creature, had imbued him with ideas for the betterment of his dependents, and he had tried to fulfil her wishes. He inclined to the practical side, and to him was due at least half the credit for the improved housing and sanitation of Shereling. She, practical enough, thought that estheticism should show an equal growth; and to her shade the visitor does reverence when he admires the profuse planting of trees, the village library with its good pictures, the addition of a tower to the church, and a fine organ. Last, but not least, she persuaded her husband to have the inn called The Happy Heart, instead of The Bull and Dog.

The Happy Heart was the perfect place for a weary man to rest, whether he was from the city or the countryside. It was particularly appealing to city folks because there was no greater contrast than between The Happy Heart and the loud, flashy pubs that cater to those on the streets. Those places lure people in with their bright lights, warmth, and momentary escapism, while The Happy Heart resonates with both the physically exhausted and the mentally drained. Aside from the promise of good drinks—and anyone heading to Shereling can count on that—it also has an aesthetic charm. It's an old-fashioned country tavern of the most delightful kind, making even those who abstain from alcohol question whether they’re really making the right choice. It features a porch draped in Virginia creeper, rose bushes that extend a warm welcome and the hope of relaxation for farmers or golfers after a long day. A contemplative cow, seemingly a permanent fixture, chews her cud in a nearby field day after day. Smoke gently rises from an old, large chimney, almost saying, "Don't worry! I come from the kitchen!" There’s also one of those signposts you sometimes see in the south—a pillar set apart from the inn itself with a swinging sign above. By the way, the name was the creative idea of the squire's wife. When the squire inherited his estate and got married, he had big dreams. He wanted to be impressive like Dogberry and have everything look nice. His wife, a charming and imaginative woman, inspired him with ideas to improve the lives of their tenants, and he attempted to make her wishes a reality. He tended to be practical, and he deserves at least half the credit for the better housing and sanitation in Shereling. She, realistic in her own way, believed that aesthetics should develop just as much; and visitors pay homage to her influence when they admire the lush greenery, the village library featuring lovely artwork, the church's new tower, and a beautiful organ. Last but not least, she convinced her husband to name the inn The Happy Heart instead of The Bull and Dog.

In this desirable residence Tony and Robert Hedderwick sat at two o'clock, enjoying their cigars after a copious lunch. Robert had slept the whole morning, and now felt a new man. Tony was tired, but disinclined for bed,—there had been too much to interest him up to the present, and he felt there might be more to come. This was such a new sensation that he had no trouble in propping his eyelids till the evening, and he listened with zest while Robert prattled cheerfully of his incredible adventures. They had, of course, agreed to work as partners, so long as tedium kept away: they were mutually attracted, and already more than friendly. Confidences had been exchanged: Tony had repeated to the envious churchwarden some of the tamer episodes of his dilettante existence; Robert had tried to cap them with his burglars and Alicia.

In this nice house, Tony and Robert Hedderwick were sitting at two o'clock, enjoying their cigars after a big lunch. Robert had slept all morning and now felt refreshed. Tony was tired but didn’t want to sleep—there had been too much to keep him interested, and he sensed there might be more excitement ahead. This was such a new feeling that he had no trouble keeping his eyes open until evening, and he listened eagerly as Robert chatted happily about his amazing adventures. They had, of course, agreed to work together as long as boredom stayed away: they were drawn to each other and already more than just friends. They had shared personal stories: Tony had told the envious churchwarden some of the milder moments of his casual life; Robert had tried to top them with stories about his break-ins and Alicia.

"But you ought to let your wife know something," suggested Tony. "She may be worrying."

"But you should let your wife know something," Tony suggested. "She might be worrying."

The churchwarden looked a little uneasy. "If I write I might be traced by the postmark," he objected. "I suppose I might send a letter saying I'm all right to a friend, and get him to readdress it. But even then there's a danger...."

The churchwarden seemed a bit anxious. "If I write, I could be tracked by the postmark," he said. "I guess I could send a letter to a friend saying I'm okay and have him readdress it. But even then, there’s still a risk...."

"There's danger any way," said Tony, smoking thoughtfully. "From what you tell me, I should think Mrs. Hedderwick would not hesitate to use detectives if she thought it necessary. I should hardly think it would be long before they picked up your trail, unless you communicate with her. Really, you know——" He broke off suddenly and laughed. "No! don't write; I've got a better plan. I won't tell you now, but keep it for a little—till a dull hour comes and we are hard up for something to do."

"There's danger no matter what," Tony said, taking a thoughtful puff from his cigarette. "From what you’ve told me, I think Mrs. Hedderwick wouldn’t hesitate to hire detectives if she found it necessary. It wouldn’t be long before they picked up your trail unless you talk to her. Really, you know—" He suddenly stopped and laughed. "No! Don’t write; I've got a better idea. I won’t tell you right now, but keep it in mind for a little while—until we hit a slow moment and need something to do."

Robert, naturally curious, begged for enlightenment, but Tony was adamant. Changing his ground, he declared that there was no hurry for a day or two,—or at least for a few hours. Mrs. Hedderwick would probably take a couple of days to make up her mind to use the police, and meanwhile they were better employed in seizing the thrills of the moment. Tony got his way, of course: he was accustomed to lead and exact obedience. Personality and class-consciousness, coupled with a humor that appealed to his victims, made the task easy.

Robert, naturally curious, pleaded for more information, but Tony was firm. Shifting his stance, he said there was no rush for a day or two—or at least for a few hours. Mrs. Hedderwick would likely take a couple of days to decide whether to call the police, and in the meantime, they were better off enjoying the excitement of the moment. Tony got his way, of course; he was used to being in charge and getting compliance. His personality and sense of class, combined with a charm that resonated with those around him, made it an easy task.

"I haven't told you yet," said he, after silencing Robert's objections, "what I did with my morning. Well, I looked round and got the general hang of the village. More, I followed our mysterious friend—let's call him Billy,—and from a distance saw him enter The Quiet House. (Queer place that, by the way. Surrounded by a brick wall ten feet high,—couldn't get a glimpse inside except through a gate.) The landlord tells me that he hasn't booked a bed here, so it looks either as if he meant to leave Shereling or stay at The Quiet House."

"I haven't mentioned this to you yet," he said, cutting off Robert's objections, "but here’s what I did this morning. I checked out the village and got a feel for the place. Also, I followed our mysterious friend—let’s call him Billy—and from a distance, I saw him go into The Quiet House. (Weird place, by the way. It’s surrounded by a ten-foot high brick wall, so I couldn’t see inside except through a gate.) The landlord told me he hasn’t booked a room here, so it seems like he either plans to leave Shereling or is staying at The Quiet House."

"A good job, too," commented Robert. "It wouldn't do for him to see me. Of course I should be recognized at once, and that would make him suspicious."

"A good job, too," Robert said. "It wouldn’t be good for him to see me. He would definitely recognize me right away, and that would make him suspicious."

"Quite so," agreed Tony. "If he hung about here you'd have to stay in bed all day,—rather a depressing prospect when fun is promised. But if I were you I'd give a false name to the landlord. If Billy heard of Mr. Hedderwick it would make him think of things."

"Exactly," Tony agreed. "If he stuck around here, you'd have to stay in bed all day, which is pretty depressing when there's fun to be had. But if I were you, I’d use a fake name with the landlord. If Billy found out about Mr. Hedderwick, it would just get him thinking."

Robert had an instinctive repugnance to the plan. In some obscure way it savored of criminality, and the shackles of convention were still not wholly broken. But in the end Tony again triumphed, and the blameless Hedderwick was dubbed Bangs. He did not particularly care for the choice; but as Tony said he looked the perfect essential Bangs and that any other name would be unthinkable, Robert gave way.

Robert felt an instinctive dislike for the plan. In some unclear way, it felt wrong, and he couldn't completely shake off the constraints of convention. But in the end, Tony won again, and the innocent Hedderwick was given the name Bangs. He wasn't too fond of the choice, but since Tony insisted he looked like the perfect Bangs and that any other name would be unimaginable, Robert relented.

"Oh, and I saw some one else," continued Tony when the point was settled. "A remarkably pretty girl. She, too, entered The Quiet House—some time after Billy. I had seen him safely in, and was waiting by the roadside when she came along. She snubbed me—quite properly,—but was kindly careless enough to drop a card. It bore the name of Miss Arkwright, who, I understand, owns The Quiet House. But somehow I don't feel sure that the card is hers."

"Oh, and I saw someone else," Tony continued once the discussion was settled. "A really pretty girl. She also went into The Quiet House—some time after Billy. I had seen him go in safely and was waiting by the roadside when she walked by. She ignored me—totally fair—but was casually nice enough to drop a card. It had the name Miss Arkwright on it, who I hear owns The Quiet House. But somehow, I'm not entirely convinced that the card actually belongs to her."

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Dunno," said Tony with a dissatisfied air. "I haven't any reasonable evidence. A kind of intuition, I suppose, more than anything else. Somehow she doesn't look an Arkwright,—she hasn't got an Arkwright personality. Now, you simply exude Bangs at every pore,—you're all right."

"Dunno," Tony said, sounding unhappy. "I don't have any solid proof. Just a feeling, I guess, more than anything else. Somehow she doesn't seem like an Arkwright—she doesn't have that Arkwright vibe. But you, you just ooze Bangs from every pore—you're good."

"What was she like?"

"What was she like?"

"Bangs being a respectable married man, mere good looks have no interest for him." ("Oh, but they have!" interrupted Robert with a naif eagerness.) "Well, they oughtn't to, then. As a matter of fact, she was deucedly pretty, and—good lord!"

"Bangs, being a respectable married man, isn't interested in just good looks." ("Oh, but he is!" interrupted Robert with a naive eagerness.) "Well, he shouldn't be, then. The truth is, she was really pretty, and—good grief!"

He broke off and jumped to his feet in a listening attitude. Robert did the same, for in the porch they heard the voice of Lionel—or "Billy," as they had named their anonymous friend—in conversation with the landlord. The two men were discussing the weather, and Tony and his partner looked frantically at each other for a plan. In another minute Lionel might enter the parlor, and there was no escape. The door was but a yard distant from the porch: the window opened on the road. To leave the room by either egress might mean discovery, and for Robert to be recognized by Lionel would ruin all. That is, it might effectively put an end to the development of the adventure, for if "Billy's" suspicions were awakened he might take the first train back to town. At least he would be put on his guard, and that would make things more difficult than ever. It was imperative that Robert should be hidden from sight. But where? He could not be concealed under the table, for no cloth lay upon it, drooping decorously over the edges. There was no cupboard large enough to contain the bulk of Bangs. No friendly screen, the time-honored refuge of the dramatist, stood in any corner. No Falstaffian basket was there to promise aid. The room was a Sahara in view of the unhappy arrival of "Billy," and beads of perspiration stood out on Robert's brow as he waited, without a plan, helpless as a trapped rabbit.

He stopped and jumped to his feet, ready to listen. Robert did the same because they heard the voice of Lionel—or "Billy," as they called their anonymous friend—talking with the landlord on the porch. The two men were chatting about the weather, and Tony and his partner exchanged frantic glances, trying to come up with a plan. In a minute, Lionel might walk into the parlor, and there would be no way out. The door was just a yard away from the porch, and the window faced the road. Leaving the room through either exit could lead to being discovered, and if Robert was recognized by Lionel, it would ruin everything. It might effectively end the adventure because if "Billy" got suspicious, he could take the first train back to town. At the very least, he'd be on guard, making things even more difficult. It was crucial that Robert stay out of sight. But where could he hide? He couldn’t fit under the table since it didn’t have a cloth draping over the edges. There was no cupboard big enough to hide Bangs. There wasn’t a friendly screen, the classic hiding spot in dramas, in any corner. No Falstaffian basket was around to offer help. The room felt like a desert with the impending arrival of "Billy," and beads of sweat formed on Robert’s forehead as he waited, powerless and without a plan, like a trapped rabbit.

Tony's friends used sometimes to complain that he put them in impossible situations. The charge was not unjust; but, as Tony would point out when accused, he was equally ready to sacrifice himself if circumstances demanded it. It was unfortunate, no doubt, that Fate seemed to prefer the immolation of a friend, but that was not his fault,—it was Fate who should be reviled. This was an occasion calling for presence of mind, resource and unflinching discipline. If the adventure of his life was to be carried through successfully, no minor considerations—such as friendship or soot—could be allowed to weigh. With a strong gesture he pointed to the old-fashioned hearth and capacious chimney. "Up you go!" he whispered. "Look sharp!"

Tony's friends would sometimes complain that he put them in tough situations. Their complaint wasn’t entirely unfair; however, as Tony would argue when confronted, he was just as willing to put himself on the line if needed. It was unfortunate, of course, that fate seemed to favor the sacrifice of a friend, but that was not on him—it was fate that deserved to be blamed. This was a moment that required quick thinking, resourcefulness, and unwavering discipline. If he was going to make it through the adventure of his life successfully, no trivial matters—like friendship or dirt—could be allowed to hold him back. With a decisive gesture, he pointed to the old-fashioned fireplace and large chimney. "Up you go!" he whispered. "Be quick!"

Robert recoiled. "No! no!" he whispered piteously. "Not that! Surely——"

Robert flinched. "No! No!" he whispered desperately. "Not that! Surely—"

He was not allowed to argue. In another moment Robert felt himself led, as in a dream, to the fireplace. The next, and he had a foot upon the massive iron bars. Luckily there was no fire laid, no coal to disturb and proclaim his bid for obscurity. He looked up into the cavernous darkness and groaned in spirit; that was the first time he regretted his mad flight. Then, helping himself by projecting bricks, searching for insecure crevices with his toes, he began to climb the few feet necessary to safety.

He couldn't argue. In a moment, Robert felt himself being led, as if in a dream, to the fireplace. The next thing he knew, he had one foot on the massive iron bars. Fortunately, there wasn't a fire set, no coal to mess with and reveal his desire to disappear. He looked up into the deep darkness and sighed heavily; it was the first time he regretted his reckless escape. Then, using bricks for support and looking for loose spots with his toes, he started to climb the few feet needed to get to safety.

By the time his ankles were the only visible evidence the hearth was covered with soot, and Tony looked anxiously round for something to remove it. As chance would have it, a broom stood in the corner of the parlor, left there by a careless servant after the morning's tidy-up. Triumph in his eye, Tony seized it and approached the hearth. But on getting there his purpose changed; temptation was too strong. Pushing the broom up the chimney, he used it as one uses a ramrod, helping the murmurous Robert in his upward path. "Excelsior, old friend!" whispered Tony, for an ankle could still be seen. "Excelsior!" and he thrust with frenzy. The only response was a muffled sound that floated down, a subdued kind of blasphemous choke. It filtered into the parlor as "Orpgh," but Tony did not relax his efforts till the ankle had disappeared. The next moment Lionel entered the room, followed by the landlord. The latter gave an astonished grunt as he surveyed Tony, hands and face smudged like a Christy Minstrel, and even Lionel's breeding found it hard to restrain a laugh.

By the time his ankles were the only visible signs that the hearth was covered in soot, Tony looked around nervously for something to clean it up. As luck would have it, a broom was leaning in the corner of the parlor, left there by a careless servant after the morning tidy-up. With triumph in his eye, Tony grabbed it and went over to the hearth. But when he got there, his plan changed; the temptation was too strong. He pushed the broom up the chimney, using it like a ramrod to help the murmuring Robert on his way up. "Excelsior, old friend!" Tony whispered, as an ankle was still visible. "Excelsior!" and he thrust it with zeal. The only reply was a muffled sound that came down—a soft, blasphemous choke. It filtered into the parlor as "Orpgh," but Tony didn't stop until the ankle had vanished. The next moment, Lionel walked into the room, followed by the landlord. The landlord let out an astonished grunt as he looked at Tony, whose hands and face were smudged like a Christy Minstrel, and even Lionel found it hard to hold back a laugh.

"There has been a fall of soot, Mr. Glew," observed Tony blandly. "I found this broom, and was just going——"

"There’s been a drop of soot, Mr. Glew," Tony said casually. "I found this broom and was just about to—"

"Lor', sir, don't you trouble," said Glew, scandalized that a guest could so demean himself. "The servant'll do that presently. I was just saying to the missus a week ago come Thursday that we should 'ave to get our chimneys cleaned soon. We'll 'ave to set about it in earnest now, and no mistake."

"Look, sir, don’t worry about it," said Glew, shocked that a guest could lower himself like that. "The servant will take care of it soon. I was just telling my wife a week ago on Thursday that we should get our chimneys cleaned soon. We really need to get on that now, no doubt about it."

"I suppose you send over to Dallingham for a sweep?" suggested Lionel, sitting down. The landlord chuckled.

"I guess you send someone over to Dallingham for a sweep?" suggested Lionel, sitting down. The landlord chuckled.

"Yes, sir, when the squire's at 'ome. 'E makes us. But when 'e's abroad, why, we do the old-fashioned way—light a batten of straw and burn the flue clear."

"Yeah, when the squire's at home, he makes us do it. But when he's away, we stick to the old-fashioned method—light a piece of straw and clear the flue."

A slight scuffle proceeding from the chimney seemed to hint that Mr. Bangs had heard. Could it be that he feared lest they were going to clean the flue in the old-fashioned way now, or was he merely suffering from cramp? Whichever it was, he shifted: the noise was unmistakable, and the fall of more soot made the landlord shake his head.

A small scuffle coming from the chimney suggested that Mr. Bangs had heard. Was it possible he feared they were going to clean the flue the old-fashioned way now, or was he just dealing with cramps? Whatever it was, he moved: the noise was clear, and the drop of more soot made the landlord shake his head.

"I doubt there's a bird got down the chimney," he said, scratching his chin. "Those jackdaws or young rooks do sometimes. Give me the broom, sir, and I'll soon have him down."

"I doubt there's a bird that got stuck in the chimney," he said, scratching his chin. "Those jackdaws or young rooks sometimes do. Hand me the broom, sir, and I'll get it down in no time."

Tony's hand tightened on the broom.

Tony's grip on the broom tightened.

"Let me," he said suavely. "There's no need for two people to get black." Without waiting for a reply he approached the fireplace and thrust his weapon strenuously aloft. It was no time for half measures, and Tony felt obliged to be as realistic as possible in the interests of his friend. Realism, however, may be carried to excess (as Mr. Bangs pointed out later with no little heat), and the fluttering of the mythical bird would have drawn tears to the eyes of humanitarians.

"Let me," he said smoothly. "There's no reason for two people to get hurt." Without waiting for a response, he walked over to the fireplace and raised his weapon high. It wasn't the time for half measures, and Tony felt he had to be as realistic as possible for his friend's sake. However, realism can be taken too far (as Mr. Bangs later pointed out with considerable frustration), and the fluttering of the mythical bird would have brought tears to the eyes of humanitarians.

"It's no good, sir," said the landlord, dismally observing the soot; "it's out o' reach. I fancy I'd better get that straw and ha' done with it."

"It's no use, sir," the landlord said, sadly looking at the soot; "it's out of reach. I think I'd better get that straw and just deal with it."

"That's rather too cruel, landlord," said Lionel from his seat. "I don't like the idea of smothering the poor beast."

"That's a bit too harsh, landlord," said Lionel from his seat. "I don't like the thought of suffocating the poor animal."

"Put it this way, sir," said Glew, who was an amiable fellow; "is it better to smother it or leave it there to starve? My way 'ud take five minutes—yours a couple o' days. Well, sir?"

"Let me put it this way, sir," said Glew, who was a friendly guy; "is it better to suffocate it or let it be there to die of hunger? My way would take five minutes—yours a couple of days. So, what's it going to be, sir?"

"I suppose you're right," said the soft-hearted Lionel, "but I don't half like——"

"I guess you’re right," said the soft-hearted Lionel, "but I really don’t like——"

"Don't you worry," struck in Tony, who was beginning to get anxious. "I tell you what! It's a big chimney and I'm pretty slim. If you'll let me go up to-night after the pub's closed, Mr. Glew, I'll strip and climb. Of course we mustn't leave it there, and smothering doesn't appeal to me."

"Don’t worry," Tony said, starting to feel anxious. "I have an idea! It’s a big chimney and I’m pretty slim. If you’ll let me go up tonight after the pub closes, Mr. Glew, I’ll take off my clothes and climb up. Of course, we can’t just leave it at that, and being smothered doesn’t sound great to me."

"You're a decent chap," said Lionel, moved to admiration. Tony modestly murmured "Not at all," and hoped the landlord was satisfied. But he was not. The very ideer! One o' his guests a-climbin' the chimney! No! he'd send the boy up. Hi!

"You're a good guy," Lionel said, feeling impressed. Tony modestly replied, "Not at all," and hoped the landlord was happy with him. But he wasn't. The idea! One of his guests climbing the chimney! No way! He'd send the boy up. Hey!

Things were now looking very black in more than one sense, and the disciple of romance in the chimney had serious thoughts of a descent. But as the landlord opened his mouth to bellow for the boy, the man from up-stairs—"Mr. Beckett"—passed the door with his golf-clubs slung over his shoulder. He looked in and said, "I'm going up to the links, Mr. Glew. Dinner at seven-thirty, please," in a polished voice that carried a hint of an alien accent. Then he went on.

Things were now looking pretty bleak in more than one way, and the romantic dreamer in the chimney was seriously considering a way out. But as the landlord opened his mouth to call for the boy, the man from upstairs—"Mr. Beckett"—walked by the door with his golf clubs slung over his shoulder. He looked in and said, "I'm heading up to the links, Mr. Glew. Dinner at seven-thirty, please," in a smooth voice that had a touch of a foreign accent. Then he continued on.

Lionel determined to follow. He had been to The Quiet House that morning and had learned that Miss Arkwright was away. She would be back, however, about four. The door had been answered by the dumb footman spoken of by the vicar, who had exhibited one of those dials that stand on hall tables—"Out—in at...." So Lionel had come back, meaning to kill a couple of hours at the inn. But when he saw the man "Beckett" it struck him that he might as well waste those hours on the links. He might possibly get into conversation with this man, whom he felt sure was the Turkish ambassador. Every thing pointed to it,—the newspaper paragraph—the accent—the assumed name (for he had confessed it to the vicar)—the age. Supposing this to be so, he might be worth watching. If Beatrice were right in her suspicions and conjectures, it was quite possible Mizzi would follow him to Shereling and seek an interview. Mizzi, in point of fact might have already made an assignation—she might even be waiting on the links! Supposing he found them ... well, at least he would have verified suspicions, and could chart his course by certain knowledge. Yes, he would follow on the off chance.

Lionel decided to follow. He had visited The Quiet House that morning and learned that Miss Arkwright was out but would return around four. The door was answered by the mute footman the vicar had mentioned, who displayed one of those dials that sit on hall tables—"Out—in at...." So Lionel had come back, planning to kill a few hours at the inn. But when he saw the man "Beckett," it occurred to him that he might as well spend that time on the golf course. He might get a chance to talk to this man, whom he was sure was the Turkish ambassador. Everything indicated it—the newspaper article—the accent—the assumed name (since he had admitted it to the vicar)—the age. If this was true, he might be worth keeping an eye on. If Beatrice was right in her suspicions and guesses, it was quite possible Mizzi would follow him to Shereling and try to meet him. In fact, Mizzi might have already made an arrangement—she could even be waiting on the golf course! If he found them... well, at least he would have confirmed his suspicions and could plan his next steps with certainty. Yes, he would follow, just in case.

He did not take as long to make up his mind as we have taken to describe it. The reader, if kindly-hearted, should be glad of this; for meanwhile the unhappy Bangs has risked exceeding the proverbial allowance of "a peck of dirt" to be swallowed in a lifetime. Lionel, then, went out, leaving Tony to deal with the landlord. He sighed with relief, for at least the most important character had disappeared.

He didn’t take as long to decide as we have taken to describe it. The reader, if they have a good heart, should be thankful for this; because in the meantime, the unfortunate Bangs has probably gone over the typical limit of "a peck of dirt" a person is supposed to take in during their life. So, Lionel went out, leaving Tony to handle the landlord. He sighed with relief, as at least the most important character was gone.

"Mr. Glew," he said winningly, "I have a little surprise for you. May I close the door for a moment?"

"Mr. Glew," he said charmingly, "I have a little surprise for you. Can I close the door for a moment?"

"Cert'n'y, sir," said the other, staring. His bovine gaze followed Tony as he walked to the fireplace, stooped down, and said gently, "Come, birdie, come!"—a song of his childhood flitting suddenly across his brain. To make his meaning perfectly clear, he added, "It's all right, Bangs. You may get down from the table!" Then he discreetly retired a few paces and waited. He had not to wait long.

"Sure thing, sir," said the other, staring. His dull gaze followed Tony as he walked to the fireplace, bent down, and said gently, "Come, birdie, come!"—a song from his childhood suddenly coming to mind. To make his meaning perfectly clear, he added, "It's all good, Bangs. You can get down from the table!" Then he stepped back a bit and waited. He didn't have to wait long.

"Mygoard!" said the landlord explosively, and indeed there was excuse for the expression. It was caused by the extraordinary entrance of Mr. Bangs. He clambered down painfully for a few feet, but just as he reached the bottom his foot slipped and he sat down emphatically, facing them, in the grate. The appearance of this gnome, silent, save for a strange wheezing that rasped its way through a soot-slaked windpipe, baffled description. Tony looked at the figure with a mournful compassion, and the landlord rocked drunkenly against the door.

"My God!" said the landlord explosively, and there was definitely a reason for that reaction. It was triggered by the bizarre entrance of Mr. Bangs. He struggled down carefully for a few feet, but just as he reached the bottom, his foot slipped, and he emphatically sat down, facing them, in the fireplace. The sight of this gnome-like figure, silent except for a strange wheezing noise that rasped its way through a soot-covered throat, defied description. Tony looked at him with a sorrowful compassion, and the landlord swayed drunkenly against the door.

"You see, Mr. Glew," said Tony soothingly, "it happened like this. My friend—who, I am sure, will corroborate me as soon as he has had a drink,—my friend and I had a dispute about chimneys. He averred that they often concealed a 'priest's hole,'—one of those hiding-places for Popish priests we read about. I disagreed, and our dispute became so heated that we even staked money—Mr. Bangs, on the probable existence of such a chamber here, I on the negative side. He is an enthusiast, and nothing would content him but the immediate settlement of the question. So, despite my protests, up he climbed. Just as he was about to descend, you and the other gentleman entered. Conceive the position! He naturally had no wish to be discovered in such a situation, and waited, hoping the parlor would soon be empty. Your suggestion of the batten upset all calculations. Now, I am sure you will spare his feelings and say nothing of this. All he requires is a hot bath. You quite understand?"

"You see, Mr. Glew," Tony said gently, "here’s what happened. My friend—who I’m sure will back me up as soon as he’s had a drink—my friend and I got into an argument about chimneys. He claimed they often hide a 'priest's hole,' one of those secret spaces for Catholic priests we read about. I disagreed, and our argument got so intense that we even bet money—Mr. Bangs on the likely existence of such a place here, and I on the opposite. He’s really into it, and he wouldn’t settle for anything less than resolving the issue right away. So, despite my objections, he climbed up. Just as he was about to come down, you and the other gentleman walked in. Just imagine the situation! He obviously didn’t want to be caught in that scenario, so he waited, hoping the parlor would be empty soon. Your suggestion about the batten threw all our plans off. Now, I’m sure you’ll be considerate and not mention this to anyone. All he really needs is a hot bath. You understand?"

The landlord gave a crow of assent. But as he went down the passage a deep rumbling, suppressed but distinct, betokened that he could not regard the situation seriously. When the door was closed Tony turned apologetically to his companion-in-arms.

The landlord nodded in agreement. But as he walked down the hallway, a deep, muffled rumble showed that he couldn’t take the situation seriously. When the door closed, Tony turned to his fellow soldier with an apologetic expression.

"Awfully sorry, old chap," he said, "but it was one of those things that had to be. You quite see that, I hope?"

"Really sorry, man," he said, "but it was one of those things that had to happen. You get that, right?"

"Krwx!" said the gnome, weeping. "Krwx! airp—krwx!"

"Krwx!" said the gnome, crying. "Krwx! airp—krwx!"


CHAPTER XV

A CHANGE OF LODGING

At the club-house Lionel put his name down for a week's membership, thinking it might be useful. He learned from the local professional in the course of a short chat that there were only some half-dozen players out that afternoon, all being men. Mizzi, therefore, had not assumed the disguise of a golfer, though she might be waiting somewhere on the horizon at an appointed trysting-place. The ambassador drove from the first tee while they were talking: he was playing a solitary game against bogey, who—judging from the first three shots—appeared likely to win. The fact that he did not take a caddy might mean anything—a sense of shame or an expected meeting with Mizzi. Lionel, that he might have a reasonable excuse for keeping him under observation, borrowed some clubs from the pro. on the plea that his own had not yet arrived. He had not played golf for years, but trusted that some of his ancient skill might still remain,—enough, at least, to justify his appearance on the links.

At the clubhouse, Lionel signed up for a week's membership, thinking it could come in handy. He learned from the local pro during a brief chat that there were only about six players out that afternoon, all of them men. Mizzi hadn’t disguised herself as a golfer, though she might be waiting somewhere on the horizon at a planned meeting spot. While they were talking, the ambassador took his shot from the first tee; he was playing a solo game against bogey, who—judging by his first three shots—seemed likely to win. The fact that he didn’t have a caddy could mean anything—a sense of embarrassment or a scheduled meeting with Mizzi. To have a good reason to keep an eye on him, Lionel borrowed some clubs from the pro, claiming his own hadn't arrived yet. He hadn't played golf in years but hoped some of his past skills were still intact—enough, at least, to justify being on the course.

The scheme, however, produced little, for there was no sign of Mizzi. Lionel played slowly, keeping a methodical hole behind all the way. At the fifteenth, however, he caught up with his quarry. In a moment of ill-judged enthusiasm, and fired by the thrill of a superlative brassie-shot, he went all out for his third. It was a long hole—bogey five—and there was a deep bunker guarding the green. Lionel, after some consideration, took the mashie in preference to the iron. It was a mistake, for the green was farther than he thought. He made a beautiful full shot that flew straight but fell short, deep in the heart of the bunker. "Spoilt it!" thought Lionel with natural melancholy. "Ah! well! Not so bad, considering I haven't played for so long."

The plan, however, didn't yield much, as there was no sign of Mizzi. Lionel played slowly, maintaining a methodical hole behind the entire time. At the fifteenth, though, he finally caught up with his target. In a moment of misplaced enthusiasm, spurred on by the excitement of an exceptional brassie shot, he went all out for his third. It was a long hole—bogey five—and there was a deep bunker guarding the green. After some thought, Lionel chose the mashie over the iron. That was a mistake, as the green was farther than he realized. He made a beautiful full shot that flew straight but landed short, deep in the bunker. "Ruined it!" Lionel thought, feeling naturally down. "Oh well! Not too bad, considering I haven't played in so long."

As he walked on he remembered with a pang that he had forgotten the ambassador. In the pleasure excited by a perfect drive, a perfect brassie-shot, and an ill-fated, ill-judged, but clean full mashie, he had lost sight of the other's existence. Now he was nowhere to be seen. "Confound it!" thought Lionel uneasily; "what a kid I am to get carried away by the game! Has he holed out and gone on, or is he by any chance in that bunker?"

As he walked on, he suddenly recalled with a jolt that he had forgotten about the ambassador. Caught up in the thrill of a perfect drive, an amazing brassie shot, and a disappointing but clean full mashie, he had completely lost track of the other person. Now, he was nowhere to be found. "Damn it!" thought Lionel anxiously; "what an idiot I am to get so wrapped up in the game! Did he finish and move on, or could he possibly be stuck in that bunker?"

He hurried forward, now thinking only of the chase; and as he drew nearer he heard curious sounds proceeding from the grave of so many hopes. Voluble, emphatic and distinct utterance in an alien tongue floated through the abashed ether, and with a sigh of relief Lionel approached and stood on the brink of the pit.

He rushed forward, focused only on the chase; and as he got closer, he heard strange sounds coming from the grave of so many hopes. Fluent, passionate, and clear speech in a foreign language drifted through the awkward air, and with a sigh of relief, Lionel approached and stood at the edge of the pit.

It was a deep sandy hollow, shored up on the farther side with stout banks of timber, and at the bottom stood the ambassador cursing his ball. So intent was he on this futile but human act, that he did not observe his audience above. Lionel stood and watched, not ill-pleased that an aged arbiter of the peace of nations could on occasion show some feeling, real if regrettable. Presently the exasperated diplomat ceased his objurgations, swung his niblick once more and tried to get out. He struck once and the ball bounded heartily against the timbers, falling back at his very feet. He smote again and a shower of stinging sand whipped sharply in his face. "Whee!" he said distinctly, and Lionel's cheek tingled in sympathy. He swung a third time and with neat precision played a flint-stone well on the green, laying it dead. Being a man of obvious determination, though limited skill, he tried again, and yet once more. Then, with uncouth barbaric cries, which Lionel rightly guessed to be in the Turkish language, he lashed flail-wise at the ball. It rolled, leaped, hopped—grew vivid with excitement, but still it never left the bunker.

It was a deep sandy pit, supported on the far side by strong timber banks, and at the bottom stood the ambassador cursing his ball. So focused was he on this pointless but relatable act that he didn’t notice his audience above. Lionel stood and watched, not entirely displeased that an elderly arbiter of global peace could occasionally show some genuine, if regrettable, emotion. Eventually, the frustrated diplomat stopped his complaints, swung his club again, and tried to escape the trap. He struck once, and the ball bounced enthusiastically against the timber, falling back at his feet. He hit it again, and a spray of stinging sand hit him in the face. "Whee!" he said clearly, and Lionel felt a sympathetic tingle in his cheek. He swung a third time and, with tidy precision, played the ball well on the green, landing it perfectly. Being a man of clear determination, though limited skill, he tried again, and once more. Then, with loud, chaotic shouts— which Lionel correctly guessed were in Turkish—he flailed at the ball. It rolled, leaped, and hopped—becoming more animated with each attempt, but still it never left the bunker.

He gave it up at last. This cunning diplomat, this indomitable statesman, was obliged to own himself defeated. Picking up the ball, he deliberately took a knife from his pocket and tried to cut it in half. This proving impossible, he flung it away, resolved that nevermore should he be troubled with this particular disturber of the peace. Then with a resolute quiet action, he broke his niblick across his knee. Lionel, hoping to get into conversation, left his eyrie and joined him in the pit.

He finally gave in. This clever diplomat, this relentless statesman, had to admit he was beaten. Picking up the ball, he slowly took a knife from his pocket and tried to cut it in half. When that didn’t work, he threw it aside, determined that this particular troublemaker wouldn't bother him again. Then, with a firm motion, he broke his club across his knee. Lionel, wanting to strike up a conversation, left his perch and joined him in the pit.

"My turn now, sir!" he said with a fictitious cheerfulness. "I hoped the green was twenty yards closer. This is a beastly place to get out of."

"My turn now, sir!" he said with a fake cheerfulness. "I was hoping the green was twenty yards closer. This is a terrible place to get out of."

It was a false move. Had he waited till the other had done a hole in three, or at least made one good approach, Lionel might have found him good-humored, conversational, entertaining. But at the moment he was not himself. With a contemptuous "Allez au diable!" the ambassador looked sourly on Lionel and climbed slowly up the hill. Lionel, disappointed but not resentful, watched him drive from the next tee.

It was a bad mistake. If he had just waited until the other player had completed a hole in three or at least made a decent approach, Lionel might have found him to be friendly, chatty, and enjoyable to be around. But right now, he was not himself. With a scornful "Go to hell!" the ambassador glared at Lionel and slowly walked up the hill. Lionel, let down but not angry, watched him hit from the next tee.

He followed him round without result, and in the fulness of time saw him leave the golf-house and walk dejectedly home. After watching him enter The Happy Heart, Lionel made his way peacefully to The Quiet House, hoping Miss Arkwright would have returned. In this he was not disappointed, for the silent footman bowed in answer to his question and held the door invitingly open. Lionel accepted the unspoken welcome, entered and was shown into the drawing-room. The footman placed a chair and motioned that he should sit down. Lionel obeyed with a vague feeling that something was amiss. Was it the silence of the footman that gave him an uncanny impression, or was it the atmosphere of the house? He had heard of presentiments of ill under similar circumstances and had disbelieved them all, but now it was different ... he was uneasy. After sitting uncomfortably in his chair, half expecting it to play some goblin trick upon him, he got up and began to look at a picture hanging above the mantelpiece.

He followed him around without any luck, and eventually saw him leave the golf club and walk home looking upset. After watching him go into The Happy Heart, Lionel calmly made his way to The Quiet House, hoping Miss Arkwright would be back. He wasn't disappointed; the silent footman nodded in response to his question and held the door open invitingly. Lionel accepted the unspoken welcome, walked in, and was shown into the drawing room. The footman placed a chair and gestured for him to sit down. Lionel complied, feeling vaguely that something was off. Was it the footman’s silence that gave him an eerie feeling, or was it the vibe of the house? He had heard about bad feelings in similar situations and never believed them, but this time it felt different... he was anxious. After sitting awkwardly in his chair, half-expecting it to play some prank on him, he stood up and started to look at a picture hanging above the mantelpiece.

He was still busy with his scrutiny when he heard the door open and close again behind him. Turning at the sound, he saw a lady standing perfectly still in the middle of the room. Lionel gasped, and almost fell. "You!" he quavered, sure now that wizardry was at work. "You!"

He was still focused on his examination when he heard the door open and close behind him. Turning at the sound, he saw a woman standing completely still in the middle of the room. Lionel gasped and nearly fell. "You!" he stammered, now convinced that magic was in play. "You!"

"Please sit down," said a grave voice. "I am Miss Arkwright."

"Please have a seat," said a serious voice. "I'm Miss Arkwright."

Lionel pulled himself together with an effort, but he did not sit down.

Lionel gathered himself with some effort, but he didn’t take a seat.

"No," he objected steadily. "I am sorry to contradict you, but that is not true. You are playing a trick on me for some reason that I can not understand. But I swear that you are not Miss Arkwright."

"No," he said firmly. "I’m sorry to disagree with you, but that’s not true. You’re pulling a trick on me for some reason I can’t figure out. But I swear you’re not Miss Arkwright."

The lady smiled, as one who soothes a maniac.

The woman smiled, like someone trying to calm a crazed person.

"Indeed?" she said courteously. "Then perhaps you will tell me who I am?"

"Really?" she said politely. "Then maybe you can tell me who I am?"

"You are Miss Beatrice Blair," said Lionel in a hard voice. He was bitterly disappointed, and no wonder.

"You are Miss Beatrice Blair," Lionel said with a harsh tone. He was deeply disappointed, and it’s no surprise.

"Beatrice Blair?" repeated the other, with an astonishment that could not but be genuine. "Whom do you mean? Who is Beatrice Blair?"

"Beatrice Blair?" the other repeated, clearly taken aback. "Who are you talking about? Who's Beatrice Blair?"

"She was playing last night at the Macready Theater," returned Lionel with a patient dignity. "How she contrives to be at Shereling at this hour, mystifying a poor wretch whose only fault is a too ardent devotion, I can not explain."

"She was performing last night at the Macready Theater," Lionel replied with calm dignity. "I can’t figure out how she manages to be at Shereling at this hour, confusing a poor guy whose only fault is being overly devoted."

This he thought rather a fine speech, and he was relieved to see the clearing of her brow. But he was mistaken as to the cause.

This he thought was quite a nice speech, and he felt relieved to see her brow smooth out. But he was wrong about the reason.

"The Macready Theater!" cried the lady in a tone of satisfaction. "Ah! I can guess now. You must mean my sister, of course. There can be no other explanation. I know she is"—she shuddered daintily—"an actress, but I had quite forgotten her nom de guerre."

"The Macready Theater!" the lady exclaimed with satisfaction. "Ah! I can figure it out now. You must be talking about my sister, of course. There’s no other explanation. I know she is"—she shuddered delicately—"an actress, but I had completely forgotten her stage name."

"Her ... sister ..." repeated Lionel dully. "Why, yes ... I thought I was calling on her sister ... I wished to see her—not Miss Blair again...."

"Her ... sister ..." Lionel repeated blankly. "Oh, right ... I thought I was visiting her sister ... I wanted to see her—not Miss Blair again...."

He sat down, unable to realize it yet.

He sat down, still unable to grasp it.

"Did you not know we were twins?" she asked, clearly anxious to help him.

"Did you not know we were twins?" she asked, clearly eager to help him.

"I had heard ... but I did not expect...."

I had heard ... but I didn't expect....

"To find the resemblance so striking? I have not seen my sister for years, but when we were younger strangers often mistook us. We were mutual replicas. I imagine from your surprise that the resemblance is still very marked."

"Is the resemblance really that strong? I haven't seen my sister in years, but when we were younger, people often confused us. We were like identical copies of each other. From your reaction, I can tell the resemblance is still quite noticeable."

"That is the feeblest way of putting it," he answered, still staring as if fascinated. "You are identical in every feature—eyes—hair—even the voice...."

"That's the weakest way to say it," he replied, still looking at her as if he were mesmerized. "You look exactly the same in every detail—eyes—hair—even your voice...."

"Perhaps you might find that we differ in disposition—in character——"

"Maybe you'll see that we have different temperaments—different personalities—"

He interrupted bruskly, forcing himself to accept the incredible.

He interrupted abruptly, pushing himself to accept the unbelievable.

"Excuse me; but I can not imagine any one so perfect as Miss Blair."

"Excuse me, but I can't imagine anyone as perfect as Miss Blair."

The lady sighed. "She is on the stage."

The lady sighed. "She's on stage."

"Good heavens, madam!" said Lionel with scornful candor. "Does the stage spell infamy to you? I thought that attitude was vieux jeu now."

"Good heavens, ma'am!" said Lionel with scornful honesty. "Does the stage mean disgrace to you? I thought that attitude was old-fashioned now."

"I may be old-fashioned," she said primly, "but I am under few illusions. Of course I would not even hint that my sister is likely to tread the downward path" ("Oh, lord!" he groaned in spirit)—"one of our family must have sufficient firmness of character to rise above even her environment. But we know the old proverb of pitch and defilement; can she honestly hope to retain her bloom unsullied?"

"I might be old-fashioned," she said with a stern expression, "but I'm not naïve. Of course, I would never suggest that my sister is likely to go down a bad path" ("Oh, lord!" he mentally groaned)—"one of our family has to be strong enough to rise above even her surroundings. But we know the old saying about pitch and contamination; can she really expect to keep her reputation intact?"

"Have you ever—I won't say 'met an actor or actress,'" asked Lionel in polite wrath, "but, been to a theater?"

"Have you ever—I won't say 'met an actor or actress,'" Lionel asked, clearly irritated, "but have you been to a theater?"

"Certainly. Three pantomimes and Our Boys."

"Of course. Three pantomimes and Our Boys."

"But that is—how many years ago?"

"But that was—how many years ago?"

"It was a revival of the play," she said with a blush, and Lionel was glad to notice that she had at least one human trait. "I am thankful to say that I did not laugh."

"It was a revival of the play," she said, blushing, and Lionel was pleased to see that she had at least one human quality. "I’m glad to say that I didn’t laugh."

"And you rest your condemnation on that?" he asked, disgusted that so pretty a creature could be so narrow.

"And you base your judgment on that?" he asked, disgusted that someone so beautiful could be so narrow-minded.

"On that, on what I have been told, and on the ridiculous number of post-card favorites that I see—often in deplorable dishabille—in every stationer's shop. I have deliberately come to the conclusion that the stage is immoral. How, then, can I avoid condemning my sister's lamentable choice of a career?"

"Based on what I've been told and the absurd number of postcard favorites I see—often in terrible dress—in every stationery shop, I've come to the conclusion that the stage is immoral. So how can I not criticize my sister's unfortunate choice of a career?"

Lionel rose, pale with anger, forgetful of his errand.

Lionel got up, pale with anger, completely forgetting about his mission.

"I am sorry to hear it," he said with absurd dignity. Of course, he ought to have laughed and talked about the garden. "I am sorry you persist in such a hasty condemnation of a noble profession——"

"I’m sorry to hear that," he said with ridiculous seriousness. He really should have laughed and chatted about the garden. "I’m sorry you continue to have such a quick judgment of a noble profession——"

"And of Miss Blair," she put in with a sly jealousy.

"And about Miss Blair," she added with a hint of jealousy.

"If you like," he flung out. "I can not allow any one—even you—to criticize her. I regret, therefore, that I shall not be able to stop the night."

"If you want," he shot back. "I can't let anyone—even you—criticize her. I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to stay the night."

"I was not aware," she said with an unmoved countenance, "that I had given you an invitation."

"I didn't realize," she said with an expressionless face, "that I had invited you."

Lionel was so taken aback that he sat down abruptly in his chair. Then the humor of the situation came to his rescue and he laughed outright. The lady, too, though she made a gallant effort to control herself, failed miserably. In a moment the pair of them were united by the most perfect bond (save one) that earth knows—the mutual appreciation of a jest.

Lionel was so surprised that he suddenly sat down in his chair. Then the humor of the situation hit him, and he laughed out loud. The lady, despite trying hard to hold it together, couldn't manage it. In no time, the two of them were connected by the strongest bond (except for one) that exists on earth—the shared enjoyment of a joke.

Lionel, as the waves of their mirth broke gently into ripples and presently dissolved in the foam of smiles, realized how foolish he had been. When he set out first for The Quiet House he had taken it for granted that Beatrice had telegraphed to bespeak her sister's hospitality. It was only too clear now that she had not done this, either through forgetfulness, pressure of work, or procrastination. He had simply assumed that Miss Arkwright would receive him as her guest, and the conversation had been too briskly controversial to allow him to think. Now he was doubly annoyed at his clumsiness: he had behaved like a boor and had sacrificed the interests of Beatrice to an ill-timed chivalry. His cue was submission at all costs for Beatrice's sake.

Lionel, as the waves of their laughter turned into gentle ripples and eventually faded into smiles, realized how foolish he had been. When he first set out for The Quiet House, he had assumed that Beatrice had sent a telegram to arrange her sister's hospitality. It was now clear that she had not done this, either out of forgetfulness, being overwhelmed with work, or procrastination. He had simply believed that Miss Arkwright would welcome him as her guest, and the conversation had moved too quickly for him to think. Now he was even more frustrated with himself: he had acted like a jerk and had sacrificed Beatrice's interests for an ill-timed display of chivalry. His responsibility was to submit at all costs for Beatrice's sake.

"I apologize," he said with a frank good humor. "I thought your sister had already engaged your good offices on my behalf." He noticed hopefully that Miss Arkwright's eyes still twinkled with amusement. Clearly she was not all prunes and prisms.

"I'm sorry," he said with a genuine smile. "I thought your sister had already asked you to help me." He noticed with hope that Miss Arkwright's eyes were still sparkling with amusement. Clearly, she wasn't all serious and uptight.

"I have heard nothing," said the lady much more sweetly. "No doubt she meant to write, and forgot. Poor Beatrice! She was always harum-scarum."

"I haven't heard anything," the lady said in a much sweeter tone. "She probably intended to write but just forgot. Poor Beatrice! She was always so scatterbrained."

To a sensitive man this might have implied a lack of confidence in the protégé of Beatrice, and Lionel moved uneasily.

To a sensitive man, this might have suggested a lack of trust in Beatrice's protégé, and Lionel shifted uncomfortably.

"I hope," he said humbly, "that you will forgive me. I trust that you will allow me to prove my good faith—that——"

"I hope," he said humbly, "that you can forgive me. I believe you will let me show you my good intentions—that——"

"I shall ask you to dine and sleep?" she said bluntly, though a charming smile softened the crudity of her words. "Well, Mr.——?"

"I’m inviting you to dinner and to stay the night," she said directly, though a charming smile made her words feel less harsh. "So, Mr.——?"

"Mortimer. Lionel Mortimer."

"Mortimer. Lionel Mortimer."

"Mr. Mortimer, I do not doubt your word for a moment. I should enjoy cultivating your acquaintance and hearing some first-hand news of my sister. But I fear it is impossible. You see there are the proprieties to be considered. I am a single lady, and perhaps...."

"Mr. Mortimer, I have no doubt about what you’re saying. I would love to get to know you better and hear some news about my sister directly. However, I’m afraid it’s impossible. You see, we have to consider the social norms. I am a single woman, and perhaps...."

To Lionel this was an astonishing view of the case. After his unconventional week at the Bloomsbury flat he was poorly qualified to appreciate the apprehensions of Miss Arkwright. His brain told him idly that she was perfectly right, but his heart merely insisted on the abyss between her outlook and her sister's. And, as usually happens, the heart found the readier audience.

To Lionel, this was an amazing perspective on the situation. After his unconventional week at the Bloomsbury flat, he wasn't really in a good place to understand Miss Arkwright's concerns. His mind lazily acknowledged that she was completely justified, but his heart stubbornly focused on the gap between her viewpoint and her sister's. And, as often happens, the heart found a more willing listener.

"Quite so—quite so! But surely you——"

"Exactly—exactly! But surely you—"

"Are old enough?" she suggested helpfully, plunging him deeper.

"Are you old enough?" she asked helpfully, pushing him further in.

"No—no! I did not mean that! I only meant that surely you have a housekeeper—some person of mature age, much older—oh! much older than yourself—who would save the situation?"

"No—no! I didn't mean that! I just meant that you must have a housekeeper—someone older, much older—oh! much older than you—who could handle this?"

"Well," she admitted with an exasperating coyness, "I have such a domestic, it is true. Mrs. Wetherby is sixty. Do you think that would do?"

"Well," she confessed with a frustratingly shy tone, "I do have someone for that. Mrs. Wetherby is sixty. Do you think that would work?"

"Admirably!" cried Lionel in triumph, caring nothing for his recent buffets. "Admirably! Mrs. Wetherby shall protect you with the armor of a centurion—or of a Lord Nelson," he added scrupulously, remembering that the pre-dreadnought era would carry more conviction. "The thing is arranged! I shall stay after all!"

"Awesome!" shouted Lionel in triumph, not worrying about his recent setbacks. "Awesome! Mrs. Wetherby will defend you like a centurion—or like Lord Nelson," he added thoughtfully, recalling that the pre-dreadnought era would be more persuasive. "It’s all set! I’m staying after all!"

"Thank you," returned Miss Arkwright with a demure twinkle. ("Is she a prude? Oh, is she?" he reflected, watching.) "Of course, I shall be delighted to do all I can for a friend of Beatrice. You really do know her?" she asked in pretty appeal, as if frightened at her own rashness.

"Thank you," Miss Arkwright replied with a shy sparkle in her eye. ("Is she a prude? Oh, is she?" he thought, observing her.) "Of course, I’ll be happy to help a friend of Beatrice. You really do know her?" she asked in a charming way, as if worried about her own boldness.

"If you like," said Lionel, luxuriously recalling his wonderful week, "I shall paint a word-picture of her charms. I shall tell you how her eyes shame the starlight—how her hair can enmesh the hearts of all beholders—how her lips——"

"If you want," said Lionel, indulgently reminiscing about his amazing week, "I’ll create a word picture of her beauty. I’ll explain how her eyes outshine the stars—how her hair can captivate everyone who sees it—how her lips——"

"I do not think I need trouble you," interrupted his hostess rather distantly. "No doubt Beatrice is an attractive young person——"

"I don't think I need to bother you," his hostess interrupted somewhat coldly. "I'm sure Beatrice is a lovely young woman——"

"Young person!" he repeated, horror-struck. "Beatrice Blair a young person! Profanity! Please, please do not——"

"Young person!" he repeated, horrified. "Beatrice Blair a young person! Unbelievable! Please, please do not——"

"I shall leave you to think of a better description," she said, with a smile of pity that held no scorn. "I have some letters to write, and I fear you will have to dine alone. You must excuse me, but it is inevitable.... Do you mind ringing the bell?"

"I'll let you come up with a better description," she said, smiling gently without any judgment. "I have some letters to write, and unfortunately, I think you'll have to eat by yourself. Please forgive me, but it can't be helped.... Could you ring the bell for me?"

He obeyed, and a moment later the footman entered. "Take this gentleman to the blue room, Forbes," said Miss Arkwright. "See that he has everything he wants." The footman bowed and held the door open for Lionel. "Dinner is at half past seven. If you are dull before then, please go to the library. But perhaps you are not a reader? Perhaps you are of those 'whose only books are——'" She checked herself, as if remembering her own correctness or the immobile Forbes.

He complied, and a moment later the footman walked in. "Take this gentleman to the blue room, Forbes," said Miss Arkwright. "Make sure he has everything he needs." The footman bowed and held the door open for Lionel. "Dinner is at 7:30. If you find yourself bored before then, feel free to go to the library. But maybe you’re not much of a reader? Perhaps you are one of those 'whose only books are——'" She paused, as if recalling her own propriety or the silent Forbes.

"They taught me only wisdom—the best wisdom of all," said Lionel, answering the unfinished quotation. Then he went out, wondering.

"They taught me only wisdom—the greatest wisdom of all," Lionel said, finishing the thought. Then he stepped outside, deep in thought.


CHAPTER XVI

A LETTER AND SOME REFLECTIONS

"Bloomsbury, London.

"Dear Mr. Mortimer,—Long before this reaches you my sister will have received a telegram introducing you properly. I am so sorry that I forgot to wire before, but I have been so harassed and busy that I never thought about it. A true woman, you will say—I can almost see your superior smile as I sit writing here, yet I dare to hope that the smile will not be too superior, that a touch of pity will creep in when you remember that my worry is for a husband's freedom. If only I can save Lukos—but it is foolish to waste time on 'if's.' I mean to succeed, and you have promised to help me. You have my heartfelt gratitude already.

"Thank you for your letter telling me of your arrival at The Quiet House. Do not be discouraged that you have not seen Mizzi yet, and that you have been unable to approach the ambassador again. I have been working very hard and am not dissatisfied with the results, though they would look paltry if I committed them to paper. My information leads me to think that we are on the right track—that Mizzi is the guilty party—that sooner or later an attempt will be made to sell the document—and lastly that we must suspect every one. Yes, every one! Even my sister, perhaps, and that brings me to the more important part of my letter.

"I have not seen Winifred for some years, but from the hints you gave me in your letter I gather that she is of distinctly prepossessing appearance. (Isn't that how the police reports usually describe it?) My pen hesitates whether to write 'Be on your guard' or not. Shall I?... may I?... But it is written and must stand. Oh! do not imagine that I am distrustful—I know you can be relied on—I know you can be true and firm and faithful: but my heart fails when I remember that you are a man; encompassed, too, by perils you hardly perceive, snares almost impalpable. Forgive me! I have no right to speak like this.... I know you are honorable ... but the greatness of the stake forces me to utter my warning—to foresee danger which may be remote—to leave no stone unturned to insure a triumph—to guard against any weakness, however venial or trivial, which may make my path—and the path of Lukos!—more difficult.

"This is a rambling letter. It is midnight, and I have had a tiring day. Forgive me and understand; or, if you can not understand, forgive! I urge you again to watch my sister carefully.... Heavens! it seems a perfidy; but the life of Lukos!... Watch her, I say again. I have grave cause for suspicion, though she does not guess I suspect. Why she, above all others, should betray me I can not tell. I had hoped that—but this is weak and futile. Watch her carefully.

"You say that up to the present nothing has happened. It may well be that nothing will happen for a time. In any case, you are of the greatest service by remaining at The Quiet House—on guard! Stay there at all costs, till you hear from me again. Do what she tells you—play the hypocrite if need be—strive to conciliate her, but watch. I have London under my eyes.

"So much for the chief business. As for news, the play ceases very shortly and I may be able to arrange a meeting, when we can talk things over. On the whole, I am happy, being busy,—at least as happy as I can expect to be until.... Oh! by the way, since we parted I have had another offer of marriage. Such a nice man, too. But if only men could be satisfied with being true friends.... Some men can, I know, but the rest ... I am tired. Good night, my friend.—Your friend,

"Beatrice Blair."

"Bloomsbury, London.

"Dear Mr. Mortimer,—By the time you read this letter, my sister will have sent you a telegram introducing you properly. I apologize for not writing you sooner; I've been so busy and overwhelmed that it slipped my mind. You might call me a typical woman—I can picture your condescending smile as I write this, but I hope it's not too condescending and that you’ll feel a bit of sympathy when you remember my concern is for my husband’s freedom. If only I could save Lukos—but it’s pointless to dwell on ‘if's.’ I plan to succeed, and you’ve agreed to help me. You already have my heartfelt thanks."

"Thank you for your letter about your arrival at The Quiet House. Don’t feel discouraged that you haven’t met Mizzi yet or that you haven’t been able to approach the ambassador again. I’ve been working hard, and I’m happy with the progress we’ve made, even if it seems small when I write it down. My information indicates we’re heading in the right direction—Mizzi is the one responsible. Sooner or later, someone will attempt to sell the document—and we need to be wary of everyone. Yes, everyone! Even my sister, which brings me to the more critical part of my letter."

"I haven’t seen Winifred in a few years, but from the hints in your letter, I gather that she is definitely attractive. (Isn't that what police reports usually say?) I'm unsure if I should write 'Be cautious' or not. Should I?... can I?... But it’s already on the page and can’t be changed. Oh! Please don’t think I’m suspicious—I know I can trust you—I know you’re sincere and loyal: but I feel anxious remembering that you’re a man; surrounded, too, by dangers you might not even notice—traps that are almost undetectable. Forgive me! I shouldn’t say this.... I know you’re honorable ... but the stakes compel me to offer this warning—to anticipate any distant danger—to do everything I can to ensure success—to guard against any weakness, no matter how slight or trivial, that might complicate my path—and Lukos's path!—even more."

"This is a long and winding letter. It’s midnight, and I’ve had a tiring day. Please forgive me and try to understand; or, if you can’t understand, just forgive! I urge you once again to keep a close eye on my sister... Good grief! It feels like a betrayal, but for Lukos’s life!... I say it again, watch her. I have serious reasons to be suspicious, even though she doesn’t realize I am. I can’t figure out why she, more than anyone else, would betray me. I had hoped that—but that’s weak and pointless. Keep a close eye on her."

"You say that until now nothing has happened. It may be that nothing will occur for a while. Regardless, you’re doing a fantastic job by staying at The Quiet House—keeping watch! Stay there no matter what, until you hear from me again. Do what she says—pretend if you must—try to get on her good side, but keep an eye on things. I have my sights set on London."

"So much for the main topic. As for news, the play will end shortly, and I might be able to arrange a meeting where we can hash everything out. Overall, I’m feeling good, staying busy—at least as good as I can expect to be until... Oh! By the way, since we last met, I’ve received another marriage proposal. He’s such a nice guy, too. But if only men could be happy just being true friends.... Some can, I know, but the rest... I'm drained. Good night, my friend.—Your friend,

"Beatrice Blair."

Such was the letter that Lionel was reading for the fiftieth time since, a fortnight past, it had come to The Quiet House. It gave him little information and less comfort. From the formal "Dear Mr. Mortimer" ("Hang it! I couldn't expect 'Lionel'!" he told himself savagely) to the distant intimacy of "Your friend Beatrice Blair," it was unsatisfying to a devoted adherent of romance. Yet what else could he ask for? He was not in love—no! he was not in love, for there was a husband! Besides, Beatrice would be the last person to lead him on when.... Stay! there had been temptation on her part in the cab and in the dressing-room. Yes, there had; there was no sense in pretending to himself that there had been no encouragement: there had. Charity (a word, by the way, which the Revised Version has altered to "Love") on the instant said: "Coxcomb! She led you on to engage your services for Lukos. A pardonable deception." "Very well," grumbled Lionel, admitting the justice of the argument, "let it be so. But it seems a little rough on...?"

Such was the letter that Lionel was reading for the fiftieth time since it had arrived at The Quiet House two weeks ago. It provided him with little information and even less comfort. Starting with the formal "Dear Mr. Mortimer" ("Damn it! I couldn't expect 'Lionel'!" he told himself angrily) and ending with the distant familiarity of "Your friend Beatrice Blair," it felt unsatisfactory for someone who was a devoted fan of romance. But what else could he ask for? He was not in love—no! he was not in love, because there was a husband! Besides, Beatrice would be the last person to lead him on when... Wait! there had been temptation on her part in the cab and in the dressing room. Yes, there had; there was no point in pretending to himself that there hadn’t been any encouragement: there had. Charity (a word, by the way, that the Revised Version changed to "Love") quickly said: "You fool! She led you on to get your help for Lukos. A forgivable deception." "Fine," Lionel grumbled, acknowledging the validity of the argument, "let it be so. But it feels a bit unfair on...?"

Leaving this, he turned to other items, trying to read some new shades of meaning into the too-well-remembered words. She was working hard—good: she was fairly happy—good: he must stay where he was—good: watching—good: Lukos—Lukos—again Lukos ... h'm ... yes, good—certainly good. The beggar was her husband, after all. Good. The sister was pretty—a smile: he must be on his guard ... h'm ... perfidy ... a traitor ... of prepossessing appearance ... could she be ... jealous?

Leaving this behind, he shifted to other thoughts, trying to find new meanings in the words he remembered all too well. She was putting in effort—great: she seemed relatively happy—great: he had to stay where he was—great: observing—great: Lukos—Lukos—again Lukos ... hmm ... yes, great—definitely great. The beggar was her husband, after all. Great. The sister was attractive—a smile: he needed to be cautious ... hmm ... betrayal ... a traitor ... someone with charm ... could she be ... jealous?

"Coxcomb!" said reason again: "look at the end—'Your friend.' Then, too, there is 'another proposal ... such a nice man.' Jealousy? Ha! ha!" Lionel swallowed the pill with a bad grace and put the letter away.

"Coxcomb!" reasoned again: "look at the end—'Your friend.' Also, there's 'another proposal ... such a nice guy.' Jealousy? Ha! ha!" Lionel reluctantly accepted the truth and put the letter away.

He had been at The Quiet House for a little more than a fortnight, and up to the present he had achieved nothing. Mizzi had made no sign, the ambassador was invisible, no further instructions had come from Beatrice. Yet he had been interested and amused, studying the character of his hostess and waiting, Micawber-like, for something to turn up.

He had been at The Quiet House for just over two weeks, and so far, he hadn’t accomplished anything. Mizzi had shown no indication, the ambassador was nowhere to be found, and there hadn’t been any new instructions from Beatrice. Still, he was intrigued and entertained, observing his hostess's character and, like Micawber, hoping that something would happen.

His position was the oddest conceivable. Since Beatrice's telegram ("She introduces you," said Miss Arkwright, "at the price of five and threepence. You must be an exceptional man!") he had been more than a guest, almost an old acquaintance. He had been accepted without question, treated as an equal, hall-marked with the stamp of an Arkwright's approval, because the Arkwrights, it appeared, prided themselves on their hospitality. It was not for the sake of Beatrice alone that he received so warm a welcome: she was a lady to be mentioned with reserve, being "on the stage." But she was an Arkwright, and a guest vouched for (especially at five and threepence) by an Arkwright was a person to be considered.

His situation was the strangest imaginable. Since Beatrice's telegram ("She introduces you," Miss Arkwright said, "for the fee of five and threepence. You must be an exceptional man!") he had been more than just a guest, almost like an old friend. He had been accepted without hesitation, treated as an equal, stamped with the approval of an Arkwright, because the Arkwrights, it seemed, took pride in their hospitality. It wasn't just for Beatrice's sake that he received such a warm welcome: she was someone to be mentioned with caution, as she was "on the stage." But she was an Arkwright, and a guest endorsed (especially for five and threepence) by an Arkwright was someone worth considering.

This at a price, and a curious price at that. "In some things I am a faddist," Miss Arkwright had said the morning after his arrival. "I admit it freely. I am glad to welcome you here, Mr. Mortimer, but if you stay you must give me your word not to go outside my grounds during your visit. The garden is large—the village uninteresting, so your curtailed liberty will not be much of a deprivation. You think me insane, perhaps? Well, I have reasons for my wish,—personal reasons into which I can not enter. That is the only stipulation I make: can you accept it?"

This comes at a cost, and it’s a pretty unusual one. "In some ways, I have my quirks," Miss Arkwright said the morning after he arrived. "I admit it openly. I’m happy to welcome you here, Mr. Mortimer, but if you decide to stay, you need to promise me you won’t leave my property during your visit. The garden is expansive—the village isn’t interesting—so your limited freedom won’t be much of a loss. You might think I’m crazy, right? Well, I have my reasons for this wish—personal reasons that I can’t go into. That’s the only condition I have: can you agree to it?"

He said yes, for refusal meant a lodging at the inn, where he could not watch her. In his letter to Beatrice he told her of this extraordinary whim, and asked whether she thought it better to agree or to pack up and go. Her "stay at all costs" was sufficient answer, and though he hoped this did not mean "If need arise, break bounds and your word," still he meant to do it if necessary. The life of Lukos and her happiness were worth more than a detective's honor.

He said yes because saying no would mean staying at the inn, where he couldn't keep an eye on her. In his letter to Beatrice, he told her about this strange choice and asked if she thought it was better to agree or to pack up and leave. Her response, "stay at all costs," was enough of an answer, and even though he hoped this didn't imply "If needed, break your limits and your promise," he planned to do it if it came to that. The life of Lukos and her happiness were more important than a detective's honor.

But up to the present there had been no question of breaking bounds. He could see nothing of Mr. "Beckett" nor Mizzi, but he was obeying Beatrice. And it was not unpleasant even for a detective to enjoy luxurious idleness, a perfect garden and the society of a charming woman. For she was charming, despite her fads and bigotry. She was well read, exceedingly pretty, and could talk. The mornings she spent in writing and arranging her household affairs. After lunch she gave herself up to him entirely. Tea they usually had together in the summer-house. About five she always excused herself, and Lionel dined alone. He was given to understand that she was busy on a history of the Arkwright family and could work best at night. Consequently he never saw anything of her again till breakfast.

But until now, there had been no question of crossing boundaries. He couldn’t see Mr. "Beckett" or Mizzi, but he was following Beatrice's lead. And it wasn’t unpleasant, even for a detective, to enjoy luxurious relaxation, a perfect garden, and the company of a charming woman. She was charming, despite her quirks and biased opinions. She was well-read, extremely pretty, and great at conversation. She spent her mornings writing and organizing her household tasks. After lunch, she devoted herself entirely to him. They usually had tea together in the summer house. Around five, she would always excuse herself, and Lionel would have dinner alone. He was led to believe that she was busy working on a history of the Arkwright family and that she focused best at night. As a result, he never saw her again until breakfast.

This naturally struck him as one of the most suspicious features of the case. Suspicious—not in the sense that Miss Arkwright was an Ottoman conspirator, for that he had been instructed to expect; but suspicious for a deeper reason. More than once during the first week of his stay he had caught himself wondering, "Can she be, by any chance, Beatrice herself, masquerading as her own sister?" It was a solution that suggested itself to a mind seeking explanation of extraordinary things, extraordinary people. It was the most natural suspicion in the world, considering what he had gone through. He rejected it at first as being preposterous and disloyal, but common sense and a dislike of being victimized made him return to the idea and weigh it from day to day.

This naturally struck him as one of the most suspicious aspects of the case. Suspicious—not because Miss Arkwright was an Ottoman conspirator, which he had been told to expect; but suspicious for a deeper reason. More than once during the first week of his stay, he found himself wondering, "Could she possibly be Beatrice herself, disguised as her own sister?" It was a thought that arose in a mind trying to make sense of extraordinary events and extraordinary people. Given what he had experienced, it was the most natural suspicion in the world. He initially dismissed it as absurd and disloyal, but common sense and a dislike of being manipulated made him revisit the idea and evaluate it day by day.

In the end he discarded the theory. It was, he thought, too enormous a deception to be carried through with success: even Beatrice, actress though she was, could not have the histrionic powers necessary to the feat; such a tour de force, continued from day to day, was impossible. Besides, Miss Arkwright and her sister were different in many points. They were, it is true, identical in voice, feature and carriage, but their outlook and ideas were far asunder. Winifred Arkwright obviously hated the stage, while Beatrice Blair was an actress; Winifred seemed timid in some respects, Beatrice radiated courage; the latter had never mentioned religion; the former was a Christian Scientist; Beatrice adored asparagus; Winifred's weakness was kidney beans. These, and a hundred other variations, trivial in themselves but overwhelming in the mass, gave him heart of grace and a fresh faith in his lady of the stage.

In the end, he dismissed the theory. He thought it was too massive a deception to pull off successfully: even though Beatrice was an actress, she couldn’t have the theatrical talent needed for such a feat; maintaining a tour de force day after day was impossible. Besides, Miss Arkwright and her sister were different in many ways. They were, it is true, identical in voice, looks, and demeanor, but their perspectives and ideas were worlds apart. Winifred Arkwright clearly disliked the stage, while Beatrice Blair was an actress; Winifred seemed timid in some ways, whereas Beatrice exuded confidence; the latter had never mentioned religion, while the former was a Christian Scientist; Beatrice loved asparagus, while Winifred preferred kidney beans. These, along with a hundred other differences, small on their own but significant when considered collectively, gave him renewed hope and a fresh admiration for his stage lady.

But despite all this he claimed that Winifred might be Beatrice. It was almost unthinkable, but still it might be so. What gave the coup de grâce, at least for a time, to his vain imaginings was a copy of The Times. It has been said that Miss Arkwright always left him after five: this would have given her time to motor to London and play at the theater if she had been Beatrice Blair. But Beatrice herself had written that the play was soon to be taken off: when he saw an announcement in the newspaper that the Macready Theater was closed, he wondered if his hostess would join him at dinner that night. If she did, why, it would be a damning fact. But she did not, either on that or any subsequent day. He breathed more freely, and went on waiting as patiently as he might.

But despite all this, he insisted that Winifred could be Beatrice. It was nearly impossible to believe, but it could be true. What ultimately crushed his wishful thinking, at least for a while, was a copy of The Times. It was said that Miss Arkwright always left him after five: this would have given her enough time to drive to London and catch a show if she had been Beatrice Blair. But Beatrice herself had written that the play would be closing soon: when he saw an ad in the newspaper announcing that the Macready Theater was shut down, he wondered if his hostess would join him for dinner that night. If she did, that would be quite the revelation. But she didn’t, either that night or on any day that followed. He felt relieved and continued waiting as patiently as he could.

The task of learning the house, grounds and personnel did not take long. The servants were an aged cook, whom he never saw; a gardener; Forbes the footman; and the housekeeper, Mrs. Wetherby, a silent faded woman of over sixty, whose recreation outside her duties was the game of patience. A sad and oppressive creature, she, whose life had been a tragedy. The details were not given, though Lionel gathered that it had been a very ordinary tragedy, but enough to wither her life and make her shun her kind. Both the men servants were dumb—an odd circumstance, but Lionel was getting used to oddity. He expressed surprise one day, hoping to draw out his hostess. She was frank about the matter: "They are dumb, poor creatures, but their affliction is my gain. Most servants gossip or argue. Mine do neither, and that is why I was at some pains to engage them. It works very well, though a stranger is naturally surprised at first."

The process of getting to know the house, grounds, and staff didn’t take long. The staff included an elderly cook he never saw, a gardener, Forbes the footman, and the housekeeper, Mrs. Wetherby—a quiet, worn-out woman over sixty whose only pastime outside her work was playing patience. She was a sad and heavy-hearted person whose life had been a tragedy. The specifics weren’t clear, but Lionel figured it must have been a pretty typical tragedy, enough to drain her spirit and make her avoid people. Both male staff members were mute—an unusual situation, but Lionel was becoming accustomed to oddities. One day he expressed his surprise, hoping to get his hostess to open up. She was open about it: “They are mute, poor souls, but their condition works in my favor. Most servants love to gossip or argue. Mine do neither, and that’s why I made an effort to hire them. It works very well, although strangers are usually taken aback at first.”

The more he saw of her, the more he admired. The primness of her attitude, when he began to know her better, struck him as being anything but ineradicable; she was in some things exceedingly human. They were talking one afternoon of Christian Science, and Lionel asked her if she really believed there was no such thing as pain.

The more he got to know her, the more he admired her. Her formal attitude, as he began to understand her better, seemed anything but unchangeable; in some ways, she was very relatable. One afternoon, they were discussing Christian Science, and Lionel asked her if she really believed there was no such thing as pain.

"Of course," she said promptly. "Pain is merely ignorance."

"Of course," she replied immediately. "Pain is just a lack of understanding."

"Then you must admit," he said, "that there can be no pleasure."

"Then you have to admit," he said, "that there can be no pleasure."

She was puzzled. "How so?"

She was confused. "How so?"

"Everything must have its foil. Good requires evil as its negative, or there is—nothing. So to feel pleasure one must postulate pain. Otherwise you are incapable of pleasure."

"Everything needs its opposite. Good relies on evil to define itself, or else there is—nothing. To truly feel pleasure, you have to acknowledge pain. Without that, you can't experience pleasure."

"Oh, but I'm not!" she said impulsively, and laughed.

"Oh, but I'm not!" she said spontaneously, laughing.

"Then where are your science and your logic?"

"Then where's your science and your logic?"

"You mean I am a woman and illogical." She parried, evading the dilemma. "When you understand our true position you will realize how fallacious are your arguments. Now, what do you think of Pendennis?"

"You mean I'm a woman and not using logic." She replied, dodging the issue. "When you understand our real situation, you'll see how flawed your arguments are. So, what do you think of Pendennis?"

He laughed again, but talked Thackeray willingly enough. When, a few moments later, she idly plucked a rose and pricked her finger on a thorn, giving a little cry, he said humorously, "Ignorance, not pain!" She disdained to notice him, but smelt the rose luxuriously. "The illusion of pleasure?" he suggested, pressing the thrust home. Her eyes sparkled with indignation, but he smiled into them unafraid. They were getting on capitally, he felt, and it was pleasant to find Miss Arkwright so much of a woman. She would pay for flirtatious treatment, he thought villainously, reflecting what a shame it was that lips so alluring should be unkissed. Lionel, you may have observed, was an adaptable creature. Fickle? Surely not. He had mapped his course and was steering strictly according to compass. While Beatrice was still a grass-widow the more innocent paths of dalliance showed no warning board, "Trespassers will be Prosecuted." They were not applauded, it is true—and here he readily confessed his weakness,—but they were not forbidden. So why, in the strict execution of the charge laid upon him, may he not try to persuade Miss Arkwright to take a less frigid view of life? The reader, virtuous soul, may censure: I can only record. Yet, too, it was something in the nature of a drug to his conscience. When he had time to think (and he had plenty of time for that) he loathed the idea of being there under false pretenses, playing the spy. It was all very well arguing that it was for the sake of Beatrice, but it would have been an easier task if Winifred had not been so charming. She was too charming, but it had to be done.... Of course, he ought to have refused a hint of dalliance, but one step leads to another, and man is frail. Besides, it had not gone very far ... not far enough to hurt either him or her.

He laughed again but was more than willing to talk about Thackeray. A few moments later, as she absentmindedly picked a rose and pricked her finger on a thorn, letting out a little cry, he joked, "It’s ignorance, not pain!" She ignored him, instead savoring the scent of the rose. "The illusion of pleasure?" he suggested, pushing the point. Her eyes flashed with indignation, but he smiled into them without fear. He felt they were getting along great, and it was nice to see Miss Arkwright so feminine. He wickedly thought about how she would pay for flirty treatment, reflecting on how it was a shame that such tempting lips remained unkissed. Lionel, as you may have noticed, was quite adaptable. Fickle? Definitely not. He had charted his course and was navigating strictly by his compass. While Beatrice was still a grass-widow, the innocent paths of flirtation had no warning signs saying, "Trespassers will be Prosecuted." They weren’t exactly encouraged—he would readily admit his weakness here—but they weren’t forbidden either. So why, in carrying out the mission assigned to him, couldn’t he try to persuade Miss Arkwright to adopt a less cold view of life? The virtuous reader might censure: I can only report. Yet it was like a little drug for his conscience. When he had time to think (and he had plenty of that), he hated the thought of being there under false pretenses, acting as a spy. It was easy to argue that it was for Beatrice's sake, but it would have been much easier if Winifred weren’t so delightful. She was too delightful, but it had to be done…. Of course, he should have steered clear of any hint of flirting, but one step leads to another, and humans are weak. Besides, it hadn’t gone very far... not far enough to hurt either of them.

One mundane detail must be given in this chapter. The morning after his arrival he had written to London for a supply of clothes. For the credit of the Blair side of the family he felt that some of Beatrice's notes ought to be spent on an adequate wardrobe. They came the day after, giving color to the excuse that his valet had got drunk and pawned the contents of his flat two hours after his leaving London. Miss Arkwright did not seem to think it strange; anything might happen in that wicked city. But she considered the Homburg hat a little "too continental." This was before her education had begun in earnest.

One ordinary detail needs to be mentioned in this chapter. The morning after he arrived, he wrote to London for a new supply of clothes. For the sake of the Blair family reputation, he felt some of Beatrice's money should go towards a decent wardrobe. The clothes arrived the next day, justifying his excuse that his valet had gotten drunk and pawned everything in his apartment two hours after he left London. Miss Arkwright didn’t seem to find this unusual; anything could happen in that crazy city. However, she thought the Homburg hat was a bit "too continental." This was before her serious education really kicked off.


CHAPTER XVII

OFF WITH THE OLD LOVE

It is all very well to be urged to suspect, for, within reason, nothing is easier. The world, in the process of our education, deals out so many hard knocks that speedily we begin to look with dubious eyes on every stranger—sometimes, alas! even upon our friends. We suspect the motives of Smith, who recommends a first-rate cigar: does he get a commission? We suspect Brown, who asks us to drop in any evening: has he a marriageable daughter? Jones lauds the latest novel: is he the anonymous author? Robinson advises the purchase of Consolidated Stumers: is he trying to make us "hold the baby"? Suspicion is epidemic. What the world wants is a host of missionary spirits to say, "For goodness' sake do drop suspicion for a while and believe in your fellow man! Smith really does imagine himself a judge of tobacco; Brown, as a matter of fact, thinks you quite a pleasant chap, and his daughter is engaged; Jones never wrote a line in his life, save on a check; and Robinson for once has inside information. Give suspicion a rest!" Ah! if only the other fellow would!

It’s easy to be told to be suspicious because, within limits, it really is. Life hits us with so many blows during our upbringing that we quickly start to view every stranger with skepticism—sometimes, sadly, even our friends. We question Smith’s motives when he recommends a great cigar: is he making a commission? We wonder about Brown when he invites us over any evening: does he have a daughter who’s single? Jones praises the latest novel: is he the anonymous author? Robinson suggests buying Consolidated Stumers: is he trying to leave us in a tough spot? Suspicion is everywhere. What the world needs is a lot of people to say, "For goodness’ sake, put your suspicion aside for a bit and trust in others! Smith genuinely thinks he knows about tobacco; Brown actually finds you quite pleasant, and his daughter is engaged; Jones has never written anything in his life except checks; and Robinson really does have trustworthy inside info. Give the suspicion a break!" Ah! if only everyone else would!

Lionel had been told to suspect, and at first found the task no harder than you or I should find it. But apart from the strong inducement to forego suspicion—viz., the physical and mental attractions of Miss Arkwright—every day made it more difficult to sustain the suspicious attitude. The early surprises—the "out of bounds" rule, the dumb servants, the seclusion of his hostess and the like—gave him plenty to wonder at, rich food for a seeker of garbage. But usage made the odd seem ordinary, and Miss Arkwright always had an explanation. The servants had already been accounted for; the prohibition of the village might be a whim (though of course he was not satisfied with this), her own seclusion he guessed, from a hint here and there, was due to a disappointment in early youth. But it was really custom that staled the infinite variety of the first surprises; he had to accept the routine of The Quiet House, and could not be expected to whip up a daily supply of suspicions. One can imagine, perhaps, a Jew in a medieval baron's dungeon waking peacefully and asking his jailer, "What is it to-day, Cedric? A tooth out, the strappado, or the rack? Just a tooth? Good."

Lionel had been warned to be suspicious, and at first, he found it as easy as you or I would. But besides the strong temptation to drop that suspicion—the physical and mental allure of Miss Arkwright—every day made it harder to keep that attitude. The initial surprises—the "out of bounds" rule, the silent servants, the isolation of his hostess, and so on—gave him plenty to ponder, rich material for someone looking for dirt. But as time went on, the strange started to feel normal, and Miss Arkwright always had an explanation. The servants had already been accounted for; the village’s prohibition could just be a random rule (though he wasn't fully convinced by that), and he guessed her isolation, from some hints here and there, was due to a past disappointment in her youth. Yet it was really the familiarity that dulled the excitement of those early surprises; he had to accept the routine of The Quiet House and couldn't be expected to come up with new suspicions every day. One can imagine, perhaps, a Jew in a medieval baron's dungeon waking up peacefully and asking his jailer, "What's it today, Cedric? A tooth extraction, the strappado, or the rack? Just a tooth? Great."

The analogy is anything but exact, for Lionel did not get a succession of thrills. The daily wonder as to why she forbade him the village; why she did not receive any local god, parson, squire, or doctor; why she did this or that, dwindled imperceptibly. He did not consciously relax: he had to adjust himself to the new conditions; but the effort at adjustment grew less laborious, and soon was in some danger of ceasing altogether.

The comparison isn’t perfect, because Lionel didn’t experience a series of thrills. The daily curiosity about why she kept him from the village; why she didn’t welcome any local god, priest, landowner, or doctor; why she acted this way or that gradually faded away. He didn’t consciously let go; he had to adapt to the new circumstances; but the effort to adapt became less tiring, and soon it was in danger of stopping completely.

Not that he abandoned his vigilance. Beatrice had enjoined him with unnecessary and vain repetition to watch her sister. He gladly obeyed. The English language is susceptible of many interpretations, and who could dogmatize on the precise value to be attached to the word "watch!"? Lionel "watched" all the time, but his watching at the end of a fortnight was very different from the early vigils. He learned nothing from watching, save that Winifred Arkwright was a delightful creature, with hair of such and such a color and softness—eyes of such and such a sweetness, and so forth. Things, you observe, of no importance from Lukos' point of view, though a chronicler is bound to state them, however briefly.

Not that he stopped being watchful. Beatrice had insisted he keep an eye on her sister with unnecessary and pointless repetition. He happily complied. The English language can be interpreted in many ways, and who can definitively state the exact meaning of the word "watch"? Lionel "watched" constantly, but his watching after two weeks was very different from his initial observations. He didn’t learn much from watching, except that Winifred Arkwright was a charming person with hair of a specific color and softness—eyes of a particular sweetness, and so on. These are, as you can see, trivial details from Lukos' perspective, even though a chronicler must mention them, no matter how briefly.

They became good friends. There was no hint of boredom on either side, no suggestion that the visit was being prolonged a little queerly. Lionel, you may be sure, did not offer to go: he was obeying Beatrice (who had not written again, though he sent a daily bulletin to London), and was in no hurry to study fresh characters. It was no ill reward of virtue to find a replica of Beatrice to keep his devotion alive. A brutal phrase,—too brutal. His devotion was there, hidden below the surface, but necessarily quiescent as long as Lukos lived. That might be for years; therefore, why not sun himself in Beatrice's rays by proxy? A statue can partly compensate for the loss of an adored: even a photograph is better than nothing. But a real woman,—a living replica ... Lionel thought himself in luck. He mentioned this in one of his letters, hoping to show how strong and faithful he was. He did not mention it to Winifred. Even a lay figure has feelings.

They became great friends. There was no sign of boredom on either side, no indication that the visit was dragging on in a strange way. Lionel, you can be sure, didn’t offer to leave; he was following Beatrice’s wishes (she hadn’t written again, even though he sent a daily update to London), and he wasn’t in a rush to meet new people. It was no small reward for his loyalty to find someone like Beatrice to keep his feelings alive. A harsh way to put it—too harsh. His feelings were there, lurking just beneath the surface, but they had to stay dormant as long as Lukos was alive. That could be for years; so why not bask in Beatrice's presence through someone else? A statue can somewhat replace the loss of a beloved; even a photograph is better than nothing. But a real woman—a living version... Lionel felt he was lucky. He mentioned this in one of his letters, trying to show how strong and devoted he was. He didn’t bring it up with Winifred. Even a mannequin has feelings.

A lay figure ... was she merely that? The question came to him more than once during that peaceful fortnight. He faced it without a blush, and up to the present had always been able to give an affirmative answer. His memory of Beatrice and the unnecessary warning in her letter enabled him to watch, admire and lightly dally with the rose-weaved chains. He laughed at the warning: he was a man, of course, and no stronger than his fellows; but fancy being in danger of falling in love with Miss Arkwright! In love—real, genuine love ... absurd! Why, he was not in love with Beatrice. Was he? N ... no.... He was a free man—hurrah!

A mannequin ... was that all she was? He found himself pondering this more than once during that calm two weeks. He confronted the thought without any shame, and until now, he had always been able to confidently say otherwise. His memories of Beatrice and her unnecessary warning in her letter gave him the ability to observe, appreciate, and flirt with the rose-patterned chains. He chuckled at the warning: he was a man, of course, and just as weak as everyone else; but can you imagine being at risk of falling for Miss Arkwright? In love—real, true love ... ridiculous! After all, he wasn’t in love with Beatrice. Was he? N ... no.... He was a free man—yay!

At the end of ten days he could utter the mental hurrah with a braver note: Beatrice was a darling, whom he hoped to see again soon. But in love? No. In love with Miss Arkwright, then? (In his mind he now called her Winifred.) No. Of course not. Absurd. Was she not a lay figure?.... Stay!—that was hardly the choicest of expressions, hardly respectful or considerate. She was a delightful lady whom it was his painful duty to watch. But one must not speak of her as a lay figure: that is crude, elementary ... containing a grain of truth, one admits, but likely to be misinterpreted by the vulgar herd. "A peerless proxy" would be more in keeping.

At the end of ten days, he could finally think with a clearer, more confident tone: Beatrice was wonderful, and he hoped to see her again soon. But in love? Definitely not. In love with Miss Arkwright, then? (In his mind, he now referred to her as Winifred.) No, of course not. That was ridiculous. Wasn't she just a pretend character?.... Wait!—that wasn’t the best way to put it; it wasn’t respectful or thoughtful. She was a charming lady whom he had the unfortunate job of observing. But he shouldn’t refer to her as a pretend character: that’s too simple, too basic... with a hint of truth, he admitted, but likely to be misunderstood by ordinary people. "A flawless stand-in" would be much more appropriate.

And the proxy, what of her? How had she fared during her unusual fortnight? Patently, anything but ill. Under the sun of Lionel's sympathetic kindliness her virgin coldness melted. They talked together on every subject—men and women, books, art, music. Their views often clashed, but interest is sustained by conflict; complete agreement makes conversation a superfluity. Their conversation rarely descended to small talk, though more than once it became almost a quarrel.

And what about the proxy? How had she been during her unusual two weeks? Clearly, she hadn’t had a bad time at all. Under Lionel's warm kindness, her icy demeanor softened. They discussed everything—people, books, art, music. Their opinions often clashed, but disagreement kept things interesting; total agreement makes conversation unnecessary. Their talks rarely slipped into small talk, though they almost turned into arguments more than once.

A quarrel of friends, be it understood,—a quarrel that left no bitterness behind, but made the next meeting more stored with interest, explanation, withdrawal, even partial conversion. Their chief debatable country was the stage; and at last Lionel had the happiness of winning the admission that the stage had possibly improved of recent years. A great admission for her! He paid his debt handsomely by a promise to read a book (five hundred and thirty-seven pages, eight volumes) on Christian Science. She gave him the book next day. Alas! it now reposes in the present historian's drawer, the leaves still innocent of the paper-knife.

A fight among friends, just to clarify—a fight that left no hard feelings, but made their next meeting even more interesting, filled with explanations, some withdrawal, and even a bit of change in perspective. Their main topic of debate was the theater; and finally, Lionel was happy to hear her admit that the theater might have improved in recent years. That was a big deal for her! He repaid her by promising to read a book (five hundred thirty-seven pages, eight volumes) on Christian Science. She gave him the book the next day. Unfortunately, it now sits in the historian's drawer, still untouched by a paper knife.

So a pretty comradeship sprang up between a cloistered lady and an ineligible worldling. The latter had never a penny, had not so long ago vowed himself to the service of another, declared upon his honor that his heart was no one's, lived for the moment on a false-won hospitality. What would be the end of such a revolting character? A queer sort of hero, in very truth; but the world is an asylum of lunatics seeking happiness by a host of roads. You who condemn the road of Lionel are asked to remember the stony paths he had trodden without complaint. Let him settle any difficulties of conscience for himself, and be not too hasty in your judgments. Let him at least have his fortnight of so-called happiness. If it be not in accordance with your ideas of the summum bonum, remember that it is not his. A fortnight in an oasis need not be grudged when the desert lies behind and before. If he has not learned wisdom you may be sure that he will ere long. Rub your hands, gentlemen, and look forward to a rare feast of disillusion and disenchantment! Possibly there may be an exposure, disgrace, even a prison if we are lucky and have patience. And if you can spare a little pickle for the rod, be good enough to pass it up!

So a pretty friendship developed between a sheltered woman and an unsuitable man. The latter had no money, had recently committed himself to someone else, claimed on his honor that his heart belonged to no one, and was currently living off borrowed generosity. What would become of such a distasteful character? A strange kind of hero, truly; but the world is a madhouse of people chasing happiness down all sorts of paths. You who criticize Lionel’s path are reminded to consider the rough roads he has walked without complaint. Let him figure out his own moral dilemmas, and try not to judge too quickly. At least let him have his two weeks of supposed happiness. If it doesn’t match your idea of the ultimate good, remember that it’s not his. Two weeks in an oasis shouldn’t be begrudged when the desert lies behind and ahead. If he hasn’t gained wisdom yet, you can be sure he will soon enough. Rub your hands, gentlemen, and look forward to an unusual feast of disillusionment! Perhaps there will be an exposure, disgrace, or even a prison sentence if we're lucky and patient. And if you can spare a little extra for the punishment, please pass it along!

As for the other characters in this rural comedy—or melodrama if you prefer it—their lives have been equally uneventful during the last fortnight. Tony Wild and Mr. "Bangs" are still occupying rooms at The Happy Heart, chafing at the lack of events. They have allowed it to be understood that they are on a holiday, seeking peace. They have thoroughly explored the neighborhood, and failed to find a hint of interest in any of the Shereling inhabitants. Even the tap-room yokels have not produced a stimulating curiosity, and higher society is lacking in the village. The squire is away, and medical and legal needs, it appears, are supplied from Dallingham. There is Mr. "Beckett," it is true; but he plays golf, spending the rest of his time in his bedroom, repulsing all overtures of friendship. There is the vicarage, of course, and Mrs. Peters has been prevailed upon to invite them to dinner, for the vicar is a friendly soul, anxious to make the most of the social crumbs dropped rarely in his path. Tony and Robert have dined there, and been round two or three times to smoke a pipe and inspect the roses; but Mrs. Peters does not diffuse an atmosphere of comfort, and the vicar himself is an exhausted fountain after an hour. A kindly, cheerful little man; but sixty minutes' prattle is as much as Tony can bear. Robert might find a longer period congenial, but he is perpetually ill-at-ease under his cognomen of Bangs, fearful of betraying himself, inclined to blush without apparent cause. Indeed, if it were not for Tony, Robert might have given up the pursuit already. Not that he means to go back home as yet: liberty is still precious; and adventures, or at least unfettered repose, may be sought at Brighton or Eastbourne before he returns to nonentity. But is it worth while waiting at Shereling, where the mysterious Billy is never seen, where the remembrance of the strange lady is daily growing fainter? It looks very much as if that bright spark of romance has been extinguished: how can he hope to blow it into flame once more? Tony, the incomparable Tony, the man of many schemes, has nothing to suggest: he only says "Patience," and Robert is growing restive.

As for the other characters in this rural comedy—or melodrama if you prefer—their lives have also been pretty uneventful over the past two weeks. Tony Wild and Mr. "Bangs" are still staying at The Happy Heart, frustrated with the lack of happenings. They've made it clear that they're on a vacation, looking for some peace and quiet. They've thoroughly checked out the area, but haven't found anything interesting about the Shereling locals. Even the pub regulars haven't sparked their curiosity, and the village lacks any high society. The squire is away, and it seems that their medical and legal needs are being handled from Dallingham. There is Mr. "Beckett," it's true; but he plays golf and spends the rest of his time in his room, turning down all attempts at friendship. There's the vicarage, of course, and Mrs. Peters has been persuaded to invite them to dinner since the vicar is a friendly guy, eager to make the most of the rare social opportunities. Tony and Robert have had dinner there and visited a couple of times to smoke a pipe and check out the roses; however, Mrs. Peters doesn't create a cozy atmosphere, and the vicar himself runs out of steam after an hour. He's a kind, cheerful little man, but Tony can only handle sixty minutes of chatter. Robert might manage a little longer, but he constantly feels uneasy under the nickname "Bangs," worried about revealing himself and tends to blush for no apparent reason. In fact, if it weren’t for Tony, Robert might have already given up. Not that he plans to go home just yet: freedom is still valuable; and he might look for adventures, or at least some relaxation, in Brighton or Eastbourne before he goes back to nothingness. But is it worth hanging around in Shereling, where the mysterious Billy is never seen and where the memory of the strange lady is fading each day? It seems like that spark of romance has been snuffed out: how can he hope to reignite it? Tony, the incredible Tony, the man with countless plans, has no suggestions: he simply says "Patience," and Robert is getting restless.

But why does Tony depart so far from his usual attitude as to say "Patience"? As a rule, an adventure or an experience can hold him but for a day or two,—a week is almost unthinkable. And now, at the end of a fortnight, he still says "Patience"—unruffled, imperturbable, productive of threadbare platitudes as to the building of Rome, apparently hopeful. The simple reason is that Tony has not seen his card-dropping divinity again, and he hates being balked.

But why does Tony stray so far from his usual mindset to say "Patience"? Usually, an adventure or experience can only keep his attention for a day or two—a week is almost unimaginable. And now, after two weeks, he still says "Patience"—calm, unshaken, offering tired clichés about Rome not being built in a day, seemingly optimistic. The straightforward reason is that Tony hasn't seen his card-dropping goddess again, and he hates being held back.

In a word, the pair of them had waited, watched and spied for fourteen days without result. There had been night vigils as well as by day, but nothing had been learned. After dusk set in they had sometimes watched for hours, Tony hiding in a ditch near the front gate, Robert at the back. The gossip of Miss Arkwright's nocturnal motoring had reached their ears, and they had built something on this. But never a motor had they seen approach The Quiet House. One dreadful night they watched till dawn broke clear and stark, but two colds in the head were all that came to birth. Their watchings were a failure.

In short, the two of them had waited, watched, and spied for fourteen days without any results. They had held night vigils as well as daytime ones, but learned nothing. After sunset, they sometimes watched for hours, with Tony hiding in a ditch near the front gate and Robert at the back. They had heard rumors about Miss Arkwright's late-night drives and had built some speculation around this. But they never saw a car approach The Quiet House. One dreadful night, they watched until dawn broke clear and bright, but all they got were two bad colds. Their efforts were a complete failure.

Miss Arkwright and "Billy" might never have existed. The servants were useless. Only Forbes and the gardener issued from The Quiet House, after their day's work was over: both were dumb. Incorruptible, too, for when the ingenious Tony produced a pencil and paper, meeting the gardener on the road as if by chance, holding half-a-crown for a lure, the man made signs that he could not use a pencil. Forbes was of stouter stuff. Tony waylaid him one evening at half past nine. Thoroughly disheartened by this time, regretting that he had offered the gardener so small a sum (for he had afterward imagined that the man might have been playing a part), Tony unmasked his batteries. "Look here, my man," he said bluntly, "you are a servant at The Quiet House. I want some information and am willing to pay for it. If you'll just write down answers to a few questions I'll give you a five-pound note." Forbes' eyes glistened, and he took the pencil. Tony's heart leaped as he saw him diligently scribing. He snatched the paper and read, "I am sorry, sir, but I can not write." Tony swore, as Forbes passed meekly on. He was not used to being beaten by a servant.

Miss Arkwright and "Billy" might as well have never existed. The servants were useless. Only Forbes and the gardener came out of The Quiet House after their day's work was done: both were silent. They were also incorruptible because when the clever Tony showed up with a pencil and paper, casually running into the gardener on the road while waving half a crown as bait, the man gestured that he couldn't write. Forbes was made of tougher stuff. One night at half past nine, Tony confronted him. By this time, he was feeling pretty defeated, regretting that he had offered the gardener such a small amount (because he later thought that maybe the man was just pretending), so Tony dropped his polite approach. "Listen, man," he said bluntly, "you work at The Quiet House. I need some information and I'm willing to pay for it. If you'll just write down answers to a few questions, I'll give you a five-pound note." Forbes' eyes lit up, and he grabbed the pencil. Tony's heart raced as he saw him scribbling away. He snatched the paper and read, "I’m sorry, sir, but I cannot write." Tony swore as Forbes walked away calmly. He wasn’t used to losing to a servant.

To-day they were at the vicarage for tea, and tea alone. The hospitable vicar had suggested dinner—lunch as a pis-aller. But his wife said, "No," and he was obliged to submit. The previous dinner had caused domestic friction, and Mrs. Peters did not mean to run any further risks. She was a lady who had the not wholly unworthy wish to make a fair show in the flesh: they entertained seldom, but when they did entertain she was resolved to do things well. Soup, chicken (boiled or roast), cold lamb (palpably uncut and not an economical remnant to bring the blush), at least three sweets, and certainly cheese-straws,—these were the least a self-respecting woman could offer to the vicarage guests. The vicar, being a sensible man, would have been quite pleased to "present" (like Mr. Frohman) a simple meal. Soup, a joint with the usual supporters of potatoes and boiled celery—his own failing—a bramble tart, and a bit of Stilton,—these were the cates he deemed worthy of kings. But the housekeeping pride of his lady forbade so inelegant a repast. "I like my guests to see that I know how things ought to be done and are done, Charles," she said in a final tone: "I will not have people saying that the vicarage ..." and the rest. The vicar had given way with a sigh, reserving himself for the battle he knew must follow.

Today they were at the vicarage for tea, and that was it. The welcoming vicar had suggested dinner—lunch as a backup. But his wife said, "No," and he had to agree. The last dinner had caused some tension at home, and Mrs. Peters wasn't planning to take any more chances. She was a woman who wanted to make a good impression: they didn't entertain often, but when they did, she was determined to do it right. Soup, chicken (boiled or roast), cold lamb (clearly not just leftover scraps), at least three desserts, and definitely cheese straws—these were the minimum a respectable woman could offer to guests at the vicarage. The vicar, being a sensible man, would have been quite happy to serve a simple meal. Soup, a meat dish with the usual sides of potatoes and boiled celery—his own weakness—a blackberry tart, and a piece of Stilton—those were the treats he thought were fit for kings. But his wife's pride in housekeeping wouldn’t allow such an unrefined meal. "I want my guests to see that I know how things should be done, Charles," she said firmly. "I will not have people saying that the vicarage ..." and so on. The vicar had relented with a sigh, saving himself for the fight he knew would follow.

It had come at once. Mrs. Peters, profuse to lavishness over the more solid items, betrayed a feminine false economy over the wine. There ought to be wine, of course. Though she was a teetotaler herself, still she knew that her guests should be offered the juice of the grape. But on the desirability of spending large sums for liquid that would vanish in a twinkling she held strong views. "You need not dream, Charles, of wasting money on expensive brands. I saw some invalid port at the grocer's this morning...." But here her husband showed himself unusually pig-headed. He grew rigid at the words "invalid port." "No, Clara," he said resolutely; "I won't have that at any price—even the grocer's. I believe in good things, or none at all. I'd sooner drink water than poor wine. We can't afford good port, but we can afford good whisky or cider. Those it shall be." He was deaf to reason, though his wife begged him, with tears in her eyes, not to be so inconsiderate.

It had happened all at once. Mrs. Peters, overly generous with the more substantial items, showed a typical feminine reluctance when it came to the wine. There definitely should be wine, of course. Even though she didn’t drink herself, she understood that her guests needed to be offered some. But she had strong opinions about spending a lot on something that would disappear in a flash. "You need not dream, Charles, of wasting money on expensive brands. I saw some cheap port at the grocery store this morning...." But her husband was unusually stubborn. He tensed at the mention of "cheap port." "No, Clara," he said firmly; "I won’t have that at any price—even if it's from the grocery store. I believe in quality or nothing at all. I’d rather drink water than bad wine. We can’t afford good port, but we can afford good whisky or cider. That’s what we’ll have." He wouldn’t listen to reason, even when his wife begged him, with tears in her eyes, to be more considerate.

Cider it had been, and Mrs. Peters had felt ashamed. The sight of three men quaffing deeply of the plebeian beverage gave no comfort: they were doing it to spare her feelings, of course, and she resented the unspoken charity. Besides, she did not greatly care about her guests. Mr. Wild seemed singularly purposeless for a young man, and there was a half-veiled mockery in his speech that grated. Mr. Bangs was clearly of inferior breeding and did not seem at ease. He talked little and nervously, starting at the mention of his name. "He can not have a past," thought Mrs. Peters grudgingly, "but he is certainly not used to the society of gentle-people. I do wish Charles would not ..." The dinner was not a success, though the vicar enjoyed the post-prandial smoke and small-talk.

It had been cider, and Mrs. Peters felt embarrassed. Watching three men gulping down the ordinary drink didn't help; they were doing it to spare her feelings, of course, and she resented their unspoken pity. Besides, she didn’t really care for her guests. Mr. Wild seemed oddly aimless for a young man, and there was a hidden mockery in his words that annoyed her. Mr. Bangs clearly came from a lower social class and seemed uncomfortable. He spoke very little and nervously, flinching at the mention of his name. “He can't have any history,” Mrs. Peters thought begrudgingly, “but he’s definitely not used to hanging out with well-bred people. I wish Charles wouldn’t...” The dinner wasn’t a success, though the vicar enjoyed the after-dinner smoke and chit-chat.

So (leaving our muttons to return to them) they were at tea to-day. Or rather, they had finished tea and were taking idly on the lawn. The vicar was lying comfortably in a basket-chair, trying to color a meerschaum. Mrs. Peters was busy with embroidery. Tony and Robert in deck-chairs were smoking too, contributing their quota to the conversation. To complete the picture, Brown, the odd-job man, was delving holes destined to receive the posts of a pergola. Mrs. Peters' eye wandered from her work and dwelt frigidly on him.

So, leaving our sheep to return to them, they were having tea today. Or rather, they had finished tea and were lounging on the lawn. The vicar was comfortably sprawled in a basket chair, trying to color a meerschaum pipe. Mrs. Peters was focused on her embroidery. Tony and Robert, in deck chairs, were smoking as well, adding their thoughts to the conversation. To complete the scene, Brown, the handyman, was digging holes for the posts of a pergola. Mrs. Peters’ gaze shifted from her work and rested coldly on him.

"By the way, Charles," she said, "did you ever speak to Brown about that young woman?"

"By the way, Charles," she said, "did you ever talk to Brown about that young woman?"

"What young woman?" asked the vicar lazily. Mrs. Peters recounted the incident.

"What young woman?" the vicar asked lazily. Mrs. Peters told the story.

"No, my dear," said the vicar. "You could not tell me her name: all you had to go on was a voice, and I could hardly catechize him on that. Besides, it may be a worthy attachment."

"No, my dear," said the vicar. "You wouldn’t be able to tell me her name: all you had to go on was a voice, and I could hardly question him about that. Besides, it might be a meaningful connection."

"Very possibly," agreed his wife, though her tone was skeptical. "I have no objections to that. But while he is at work ..."

"Probably," his wife agreed, though her tone was doubtful. "I have no issues with that. But while he's at work ..."

"Awful word!" said Tony, for the sake of saying something. "I wonder what work is like—real continuous work, I mean."

"Awful word!" Tony said, just to say something. "I wonder what real continuous work is like."

"We can offer you plenty," said the vicar cheerfully. "The lawn wants cutting. You could trim the hedge, too, and——"

"We can offer you a lot," the vicar said cheerfully. "The lawn needs mowing. You could also trim the hedge, and——"

"No thanks," said Tony with a shudder. "Any other time I'd be glad, but just now I'm too busy."

"No thanks," Tony said, shuddering. "Any other time I’d be happy to, but right now I'm just too busy."

"Of course, Mr. Wild, my husband was joking. But don't you think that an idle life...? Would not work—literary work, for example—be a good thing for a young man?"

"Of course, Mr. Wild, my husband was just joking. But don’t you think that a life without much to do...? Wouldn’t literary work, for instance, be a great opportunity for a young man?"

"I'm too old to begin," said Tony wearily. "Now, a hearty young spark like my friend Bangs——"

"I'm too old to start," Tony said tiredly. "Now, a lively young guy like my friend Bangs——"

The spark flickered into a feeble flame of protest and died away.

The spark flickered into a weak flame of protest and faded out.

"You're wrong, Mr. Wild," said the vicar, taking his pipe out. "Work is the best thing. You'd realize it if you tried it. Of course, now you're on a holiday——"

"You're mistaken, Mr. Wild," the vicar said, pulling out his pipe. "Work is the best thing. You'd understand that if you gave it a go. But of course, right now you're on a break——"

"Am I?" said Tony. "I'm a kind of bear-leader to Bangs. I'm simply full-up with work, looking after him—arranging schemes for his comfort—keeping him out of mischief. Aren't I, Bangs?"

"Am I?" Tony said. "I'm like a tour guide for Bangs. I'm totally swamped with work, taking care of him—setting up plans for his comfort—making sure he doesn't get into trouble. Right, Bangs?"

Robert smiled in a deprecating way. "You—you exaggerate a little. But—but——"

Robert smiled in a self-deprecating way. "You—you exaggerate a bit. But—but——"

Mrs. Peters disliked the cynical frivolity Tony imparted to the conversation. "Would you mind telling us the nature of some of these arduous duties?" she asked coldly.

Mrs. Peters disliked the sarcastic lightheartedness Tony brought to the conversation. "Could you tell us what some of these tough tasks are?" she asked coolly.

"Oh, there's a gay lot," said Tony, reflecting. "I've had to order lunch, for example: Bangs has no ideas. Then I organize walks ... and deal the hands at piquet in the evenings ... and ... by jove, yes! I promised to help him telephone to-day, if you wouldn't mind?"

"Oh, there's a lively group," said Tony, thinking. "I've had to arrange lunch, for instance: Bangs has no ideas. Then I plan walks ... and deal the cards at piquet in the evenings ... and ... wow, yes! I promised to help him with the phone today, if that works for you?"

"Not a bit," said the vicar, the sole possessor of a telephone in Shereling. He rose and stretched himself. "Come along now."

"Not at all," said the vicar, the only person in Shereling with a telephone. He stood up and stretched. "Let's go."

But Robert remained in his chair, looking decidedly uneasy. "No, no!" he said with a frightened manner. "It is nothing. It will keep for a day or two. There is really no necessity...." He began to stammer and blush, aware of the eye of Mrs. Peters.

But Robert stayed in his chair, looking clearly uncomfortable. "No, no!" he said nervously. "It's nothing. It can wait a day or two. There's really no need...." He started to stammer and blush, feeling the gaze of Mrs. Peters.

"You promised!" said Tony reproachfully. Then turning to the lady he said, "Come, Mrs. Peters! You can't say that I lack energy now! Here am I, thirsting to get work, and old Bangs keeps me back. And only yesterday he said that nothing on earth should prevent him from at last—at long last——"

"You promised!" Tony said, sounding disappointed. Then he turned to the lady and said, "Come on, Mrs. Peters! You can’t say I lack energy now! Here I am, eager to get to work, and old Bangs is holding me back. And just yesterday he said that nothing in the world should stop him from finally—finally—"

"All right," interrupted Robert, in terror of what Tony would say next. "Come along! Come along! Where is the telephone, Mr. Peters?"

"Okay," interrupted Robert, terrified of what Tony would say next. "Let's go! Let's go! Where's the phone, Mr. Peters?"

"In the dining-room," replied the vicar, wondering. "I'll show you the way."

"In the dining room," said the vicar, puzzled. "I'll show you the way."

They went into the house, leaving Mrs. Peters on the lawn, deeply stirred. "That man has a past," she determined. "He looked simply terrified. I wonder if I ought to ask Charles.... I wonder if it would be right to.... And they are strangers ... one never knows...." She thought sternly for a moment and then got up, resolution in her countenance. "It's a duty," she murmured—"a positive duty. And Charles is so weak."

They went into the house, leaving Mrs. Peters on the lawn, deeply shaken. "That guy definitely has a past," she concluded. "He looked completely terrified. I wonder if I should ask Charles.... I wonder if it's the right thing to.... And they are strangers ... you never know...." She thought seriously for a moment and then stood up, determination on her face. "It's a responsibility," she murmured—"a real responsibility. And Charles is so weak."

The martyr to duty was going to listen at the door.

The devoted servant was about to listen at the door.


CHAPTER XVIII

TONY AT WORK AND AT PLAY

If the telephone had been in the vicar's study Mrs. Peters might have watched in vain; for to acquire accurate information through a keyhole needs practise or unusually keen ears. But the vicar wanted perfect quiet to prepare his sermons, and it was agreed that the instrument should be placed in the dining-room. This suited Mrs. Peters admirably, for there was a dumb-waiter between that room and the pantry. Standing on the other side of the hatch (which she raised with caution a couple of inches) she could hear all that passed, secure in the reflection that a screen concealed the hatch and butler's tray. This is what she heard as soon as the vicar had left the room.

If the telephone had been in the vicar's study, Mrs. Peters might have watched in vain; getting accurate information through a keyhole takes practice or exceptionally sharp hearing. But the vicar needed complete silence to prepare his sermons, so they agreed to put the phone in the dining room. This suited Mrs. Peters perfectly because there was a dumbwaiter between that room and the pantry. Standing on the other side of the hatch (which she cautiously raised a couple of inches), she could hear everything that happened, confident that a screen hid the hatch and butler's tray. This is what she heard as soon as the vicar left the room.

"Mr. Wild, I told you that I would rather not——"

"Mr. Wild, I told you that I’d prefer not to——"

"Duty, Bangs, duty! Remember that! You've allowed your unhappy wife to mourn——"

"Duty, Bangs, duty! Keep that in mind! You've let your unhappy wife grieve——"

"No, no! I thought it better not to write just yet, in case——"

"No, no! I thought it was better not to write just yet, in case——"

"Pure funk, and nothing else. No, Bangs; you ought to let her know—you ought to have let her know before this. Besides, there's no danger: she can't spot where you are."

"Pure funk, and nothing else. No, Bangs; you should let her know—you should have told her by now. Besides, there's no risk: she can't tell where you are."

("Then there is a mystery!" reflected Mrs. Peters, warm with the satisfaction of a justified eavesdropping. "He has left his wife!")

("Then there is a mystery!" thought Mrs. Peters, feeling satisfied with her justified eavesdropping. "He has left his wife!")

"N—no ... but ..."

"No ... but ..."

"Seriously, Bangs, you must telephone. Every day you delay brings a possible pursuit closer. Come now! Shall I ring up?"

"Seriously, Bangs, you need to call. Every day you put it off brings a potential chase closer. Come on! Should I call for you?"

"No, no! Wait half a minute while I think of something to say. How shall I begin? Shall I——"

"No, no! Hold on a second while I think of something to say. How should I start? Should I——"

"Oh, the usual sort of greeting from a husband to a wife: 'Good morning, little bunch of fluff!' Or, 'Cheeroh, beloved armful!' Any pet name—look here, you'd better let me——"

"Oh, the usual way a husband greets his wife: 'Good morning, little fluffball!' Or, 'Hey there, my beloved cuddlebug!' Any pet name—just let me—"

A confused sound hinted to Mrs. Peters that a struggle for the receiver was in progress. It ended speedily in a victory for Mr. Bangs. His voice quavered a number—"Bloomsbury, 843B." Mrs. Peters made a mental note.

A muffled noise signaled to Mrs. Peters that there was a fight for the phone happening. It quickly ended with Mr. Bangs winning. His voice shook as he said a number—"Bloomsbury, 843B." Mrs. Peters made a mental note.

"Hello ... hello ... are you 843B? Yes?... Who's that? Hello! Who's that? Oh, it's you, Jane ... tell your mistress—hello! You silly girl, it is me." ("She's had a fright, Mr. Wild. I ought to have broken the news more gently.") "What? Do speak up ... yes ... yes ... you've sat down on the porcelain bowl on the hall table? Confound!... what for? What for, you clumsy ... oh! I frightened you ... oh ... oh ... I see.... Well, go on.... Yes ... no, perhaps it wasn't altogether your fault ... yes.... All right ... all right, that's quite enough. I know you're sorry ... yes.... Tell your mistress I want to speak to her.... She's in the kitchen? Well, go and fetch her. Don't hang the receiver up. Yes ... yes....

"Hello ... hello ... is this 843B? Yes?... Who's there? Hello! Who is it? Oh, it's you, Jane ... tell your boss—hello! You silly girl, it is me." ("She's been startled, Mr. Wild. I should have delivered the news more gently.") "What? Speak up ... yes ... yes ... you’ve sat down on the porcelain bowl on the hall table? Good grief! ... why? What for, you clumsy ... oh! I scared you ... oh ... oh ... I understand.... Well, keep going.... Yes ... no, maybe it wasn't entirely your fault ... yes.... All right ... that's plenty. I know you're sorry ... yes.... Tell your boss I need to talk to her.... She’s in the kitchen? Well, go and get her. Don’t hang up the phone. Yes ... yes....

"She's gone to fetch her, Mr. Wild!"

"She's gone to get her, Mr. Wild!"

"The plot thickens, Bangs, I say, shall I take the receiver and telephone? Rather a lark, you know, your wife expecting you and hearing me instead."

"The plot gets interesting, Bangs. Should I pick up the phone? It would be quite amusing, your wife expecting you and hearing me instead."

"No, no!"

"No way!"

"I won't address her in terms of affection, if that's all you're afraid of. Besides, I should rather like to hear what she says to her peccant husband."

"I won’t refer to her with any affection if that’s your only concern. Besides, I’d really like to know what she says to her troublesome husband."

"Not for anything, Mr. Wild.... Hush! here she is.... Is that you, Alicia? Wheeee! Wheee!... I'm exceedingly sorry, my dear ... no, I wasn't laughing—something wrong with the wire.... Well, how are you?... That's good ... I do hope you haven't been worrying.... What?... Oh ... oh ... ah...." ("She says I'm not worth worrying about!" "Cover it UP, you fool! She'll hear you!") ... "Eh?... no ... nobody else here, my love ... quite alone—quite alone ... the wire...." ("What's that? Magnetic storm?") ... "Magnetic storm, Alicia! Plug's not firmly in, perhaps.... Well, you're all right, then? Anything else?... Oh, me! Oh, I'm in capital form.... What?... Yes, that's all.... What?... Oh, I thought I'd better ring up to let you know how I was getting on.... Yes ... yes ... I shall come back presently.... No ... no ... absolutely no.... I can't possibly tell you my present address ... but you needn't worry. I'm quite all right ... eh?... No ... I'm not unfeeling—this is just my holiday. I shall be back in a few weeks. I send you my love. Good-by."

"Not for anything, Mr. Wild.... Hush! Here she is.... Is that you, Alicia? Wheeee! Wheee!... I'm really sorry, my dear ... no, I wasn't laughing—there's something wrong with the connection.... So, how are you?... That's good ... I hope you haven't been worrying.... What?... Oh ... oh ... ah...." ("She says I'm not worth worrying about!" "Shut it, you fool! She'll hear you!") ... "Eh?... no ... nobody else here, my love ... just us—just us ... the connection...." ("What's that? Magnetic storm?") ... "Magnetic storm, Alicia! The plug might not be in properly.... So, you’re all right, then? Anything else?... Oh, me! I'm doing fantastic.... What?... Yes, that's it.... What?... Oh, I thought I’d better call to let you know how I was doing.... Yes ... yes ... I'll come back soon.... No ... no ... absolutely no.... I can't possibly tell you my current address ... but you don’t need to worry. I'm completely fine ... eh?... No ... I'm not heartless—this is just my vacation. I’ll be back in a few weeks. Sending you my love. Good-bye."

"That do, Mr. Wild?"

"What's up, Mr. Wild?"

"You might send a kiss, eh? Usual thing ... try again—I bet she's not left the wire."

"You could send a kiss, right? It's the usual thing... try again—I bet she hasn't left the wire."

"Hello ... hello! You there, Alicia?... Wheeee!... I just rang up—wheee—to send you a kiss.... Good-by."

"Hey ... hey! Is that you, Alicia?... Wheeee!... I just called—wheee—to send you a kiss.... Bye."

"So we've set her mind at rest, Bangs. You lost your funk pretty soon!"

"So we've put her mind at ease, Bangs. You got over your nerves pretty quickly!"

"Well, Mr. Wild, somehow ... it's not quite the same thing talking to Alicia from a distance ... I felt quite brave!"

"Well, Mr. Wild, somehow ... it doesn't feel quite the same talking to Alicia from far away ... I felt pretty brave!"

"Perfect hero!... Now we've settled that, let's go and find the dragon in the garden."

"Perfect hero!... Now that we've figured that out, let's go find the dragon in the garden."

They found the vicar, but not the dragon, who was lashing her tail in the pantry, impotent, speechless, aflame with anger. To hear herself called a dragon, and by a pair of unprincipled adventurers! One of them, it appeared, was a man who had run away from his wife; the other, an idle fribble who might be anything. "Thank Heaven I have no daughter in the house!" thought Mrs. Peters in a paroxysm of resentful propriety. "Who could feel safe with such men about? And this comes of Charles picking up chance acquaintances in a common tavern! Oh, I must go and tell him—expose them at once! The impudent hypocrites!"

They found the vicar, but not the dragon, who was thrashing her tail in the pantry, powerless, speechless, and consumed with anger. To hear herself called a dragon, and by a couple of unscrupulous adventurers! One of them, it seemed, was a man who had run away from his wife; the other, a lazy fool who could be anything. "Thank goodness I don’t have a daughter in the house!" thought Mrs. Peters in a fit of offended propriety. "Who could feel safe with such guys around? And this is what happens when Charles picks up random acquaintances in a rundown bar! Oh, I have to go and tell him—expose them immediately! The bold hypocrites!"

On the threshold she paused. Was it because, despite her justification, she did not feel anxious to mention the vigil in the pantry? Or was it due to a wifely consideration for a husband's weakness? She chose to believe the latter. "Charles will not have the moral courage to expel them from the vicarage!" she reflected. "He is pitifully craven in such matters. I must manage it myself.... I had better wait and watch.... They may have any designs.... Perhaps I had better wait, and then ..." A smile, terrific in severity and menace, writhed her lips. Some signal act of vengeance was evidently maturing. "Yes! I will wait!"

On the threshold, she stopped. Was it because, even with her reasoning, she wasn't eager to bring up the watch in the pantry? Or was it out of consideration for her husband's weakness? She preferred to believe the latter. "Charles won’t have the guts to kick them out of the vicarage!" she thought. "He’s ridiculously cowardly when it comes to things like this. I have to handle it myself.... I should just wait and see.... They might have some plans.... Maybe it's better to hold off, and then..." A smile, fierce and threatening, twisted her lips. It was clear that some plan for revenge was brewing. "Yes! I will wait!"

On the lawn she found Tony. Compelling herself to speak without undue hostility, she learned that the vicar had carried Robert off to inspect the greenhouse. Mrs. Peters, on the plea of a message, followed. She could not trust herself with Robert or his accomplice. "Is it he who has led Mr. Bangs astray, or the other way about?" she wondered viciously. "They both seem to be most undesirable; but Mr. Bangs is older and ought to know better. Besides, he has a wife." Had she known of Tony's matrimonial vicissitudes she would have fainted.

On the lawn, she spotted Tony. Trying to speak without being overly hostile, she found out that the vicar had taken Robert to check out the greenhouse. Mrs. Peters, claiming to deliver a message, followed them. She couldn’t trust herself around Robert or his partner. "Is it him who has led Mr. Bangs astray, or the other way around?" she thought bitterly. "They both seem to be really undesirable; but Mr. Bangs is older and should know better. Plus, he has a wife." If she had known about Tony's marriage troubles, she would have fainted.

The odd-job man had just finished his digging, and Tony strolled over to exchange a word: he never despaired of finding interest in the most unpromising material. Chats with para-orators, enthusiastic Salvationists, members of the Junior Turf Club, constellations of the stage, even housemaids taking in the milk,—all might be, and often were, instruments in the warfare against boredom. All were fish for his net. But it must be confessed that his catch had hitherto been of little value. He had bought a few centimes' worth, paying for it with numerous rouleaus, and he was beginning dimly to wonder if it was not rather an extravagant method of exchange.

The handyman had just finished digging, and Tony walked over to chat: he never gave up on finding interest in the most unlikely topics. Conversations with amateur speakers, enthusiastic Salvation Army members, Junior Turf Club members, stars of the stage, and even housemaids delivering milk—all could be, and often were, tools in the battle against boredom. They were all fair game for his attention. But it must be said that his catch had been of little worth so far. He had bought a few cents' worth, paying with plenty of rouleaus, and he was starting to wonder if this was a rather costly way to exchange.

"Done?" he asked laconically, and Henry Brown smiled with content.

"Done?" he asked casually, and Henry Brown smiled in satisfaction.

"That's a good job jobbed," he replied. "Shifting earth is healthy, sir, but it takes doing."

"That's a decent job done," he replied. "Moving dirt is good for you, sir, but it takes effort."

"D'you like it?" said Tony; "I mean, d'you find it interesting and all that, or do you pant after the higher life? More wages and less work, and so forth, I mean?"

"Do you like it?" Tony asked. "I mean, do you find it interesting and all that, or are you chasing after something better? More pay and less work, and so on, you know?"

The odd-job man shrugged his shoulders.

The handyman shrugged.

"It's my job, sir," he said philosophically. "I can't say it's amazing interesting, but it's my job, and it's got to be done."

"It's my job, sir," he said thoughtfully. "I can't say it's incredibly interesting, but it's my job, and it needs to be done."

"Got to be done," repeated Tony, musing. "I suppose it has ... by some one. Thank goodness it's not to be done by me. Tell me, Brown, what do you really think of work? Does it bore you or what? Do you think it's a good thing, so to speak? You needn't mind speaking out—the vicar can't hear, and I'm a man of the world and all that. Tell me, does work bore you to tears?"

"Got to be done," Tony said again, thinking it over. "I guess it has to be done ... by someone. Thank goodness it's not my responsibility. Tell me, Brown, what do you really think about work? Does it just bore you, or what? Do you think it's a good thing, in a way? You can speak freely—the vicar can't hear us, and I'm an experienced guy and all that. So, does work bore you to tears?"

The other smiled.

The other person smiled.

"Work's kept many a man straight, sir," he said. "I should be sorry to be without."

"Work has kept a lot of men on track, sir," he said. "I'd be sorry to be without it."

"You really mean that?" asked Tony in surprise.

"You really mean that?" Tony asked, surprised.

"I do, sir. Don't you think the same?"

"I do, sir. Don't you feel the same way?"

Tony did not answer, but reflected for at least a minute. Then he took off his coat and turned up his shirt-sleeves with a whimsical smile. "I haven't worked for years," he said: "kept myself fit with developers and other horrors. Lend me your spade, will you? I want a new thrill."

Tony didn't respond right away; he thought for at least a minute. Then he took off his coat and rolled up his shirt sleeves with a playful grin. "I haven't worked in years," he said. "I've kept myself fit with developers and other nightmares. Can you lend me your spade? I want a new thrill."

Brown laughed, but obeyed. Tony began to dig, steadily and resolutely, at a spot where another post was to be planted. He did not attack the task too vehemently, as many an amateur would have done, for he had brains. But he dug faithfully, and at the end of ten minutes he was more than hot. He did not give in, however, but dug on till the task was accomplished. Then he threw down the spade, wiped his forehead and stretched himself. Brown watched him curiously.

Brown laughed, but went along with it. Tony started digging steadily and determinedly at the spot where another post was supposed to go. He didn’t tackle the job too aggressively like a lot of beginners might have, because he was smart. But he worked hard, and after ten minutes, he was definitely sweating. He didn’t stop, though; he kept going until the job was done. Then he dropped the spade, wiped his forehead, and stretched out. Brown watched him with interest.

"Had enough, sir?"

"Had enough yet, sir?"

"For the present, yes," said Tony. "One mustn't suck pleasure to the dregs. But I'll admit it's not a bad sort of notion on the whole, this work. In small doses it might even be admirable—a kind of apéritif, you know. But, regarded as a habit ... that would need further consideration. Where can I find a tap?"

"For now, definitely," said Tony. "You shouldn't enjoy something too much. But I have to say, this work isn't a terrible idea overall. In small amounts, it might even be great—a kind of apéritif, you know? But if we think of it as a regular thing... that would need more thought. Where can I find a tap?"

"Behind that fence, sir...."

"Behind that fence, sir..."

Tony went to cleanse his hands, leaving the odd-job man chuckling. "Rum customer," he murmured: "a very rum customer, indeed. Oh, very rum! Everything's rum, when you come to think of it—more than rum.... Things seem to get rummer every day...."

Tony went to wash his hands, leaving the handyman chuckling. "Strange guy," he murmured: "a very strange guy, for sure. Oh, definitely strange! Everything's weird when you really think about it—more than weird.... Things seem to get weirder every day...."

Tony thought the same as he stood drying his hands upon the grass and a handkerchief behind the fence. The tap was screened from the lawn by the aforesaid fence, from the road by the privet-hedge. And as he dried and mused, steps, the light tapping of small feet, could be heard approaching on the other side of the hedge. From a subconscious strategy—caused by a deep-set mysterious instinct—he waited till the steps had gone past. Then he peeped through the hedge and nearly whooped. For, retreating, he observed the neat figure of his damsel of the visiting-card. Joy was excusable, for he had not seen her again since their encounter.

Tony thought the same as he stood drying his hands on the grass and with a handkerchief behind the fence. The tap was hidden from the lawn by the fence and from the road by the privet hedge. As he dried his hands and pondered, he could hear the light tapping of small feet approaching on the other side of the hedge. For some subconscious reason—driven by a deep, mysterious instinct—he waited until the steps passed by. Then he peeked through the hedge and almost shouted with excitement. For, walking away, he saw the elegant figure of his lady from the visiting card. His joy was understandable, as he hadn't seen her since their last meeting.

His first impulse was to whistle. This he checked on the score of vulgarity and bethought him what course would be best. Should he break through a weak spot in the hedge, leaving comrade Bangs to his own devices, or should he make formal but hasty adieux and pursue in the hope of overtaking? The latter was clearly the more correct procedure, but Tony's heart yearned regretfully over the girl in the road. She looked such a perfect pet! Luckily he was not called on to make an immediate decision, for she stopped a few yards farther on and gazed around. Tony concealed himself in such a way that he might still keep an eye upon her. What was she waiting for? He was not left long in doubt, for she gave a low but melodious whistle. The whistle was answered in the same key. "Brown, by all that's wonderful!" muttered Tony. "The lucky dog! No wonder he doesn't find work dull."

His first instinct was to whistle. He quickly held back, thinking it was inappropriate, and considered what to do next. Should he sneak through a gap in the hedge, leaving his buddy Bangs behind, or should he say a brief goodbye and chase after her in hopes of catching up? The latter seemed like the more proper option, but Tony's heart longed for the girl on the road. She looked like such a cute sweetheart! Fortunately, he didn't have to decide right away, as she stopped a few yards ahead and looked around. Tony hid in a way that let him keep an eye on her. What was she waiting for? He didn’t have to wonder for long, as she let out a soft but sweet whistle. The whistle was answered in the same tone. "Brown, can you believe it!" Tony muttered. "The lucky guy! No wonder he doesn’t find work boring."

If he expected a love-passage he was disappointed. The girl, as soon as her whistle was returned, flung a piece of paper over the hedge and walked quickly away. Tony gave the odd-job man time to pick up the billet and presently strolled round, still drying his hands.

If he was hoping for a romantic moment, he was let down. As soon as her whistle was answered, the girl tossed a piece of paper over the hedge and quickly walked away. Tony allowed the handyman some time to grab the note and then casually walked over, still drying his hands.

"Clean, sir?" asked the odd-job man stolidly. After all, the privet was thick and Tony might not have seen.

"Clean, sir?" the handyman asked bluntly. After all, the privet was thick, and Tony might not have noticed.

"Yes, thanks.... I say, Brown, I've been thinking over what you said about work just now. It seems to me that there's quite a lot to be said for it."

"Yes, thanks.... I say, Brown, I've been thinking about what you just said regarding work. It seems to me that there's a lot of merit to it."

"Yes, sir?"

"Yes, boss?"

"I should like to know more ... to hear a little more about the practical side of the question before making up my mind as to its intrinsic worth. I wonder if you'd care to smoke a pipe and try the cider of The Happy Heart with me to-night?"

"I'd like to know more ... to hear a bit more about the practical side of the issue before deciding on its true value. I wonder if you'd like to smoke a pipe and try the cider from The Happy Heart with me tonight?"

"Thank you, sir," replied Brown, betraying no surprise, "but I'm afraid I'm too busy."

"Thank you, sir," Brown said, showing no surprise, "but I'm afraid I'm too busy."

"To-morrow, then...."

"Tomorrow, then...."

"Busy to-morrow, sir, too."

"Busy tomorrow, sir, too."

"Sunday an off day?"

"Is Sunday a day off?"

"To be frank, sir, I have a young lady...."

"Honestly, sir, I have a young woman...."

"Ah!" said Tony, hoping to hear something. "I won't press you then. I wish you luck."

"Ah!" Tony said, hoping to hear something. "I won't push you then. Good luck!"

"Thank you, sir."

"Thanks, sir."

There was a brief silence that Tony felt oppressive. He was the first to break it.

There was a short silence that Tony found heavy. He was the first to speak up.

"Been engaged long, Brown?"

"Been engaged for a while, Brown?"

"No, sir. Not very long."

"No, sir. Not that long."

Another silence. The impenetrability of these yokels is not exhilarating. Tony felt chilled, disappointed. He tried again.

Another silence. The stubbornness of these locals is not uplifting. Tony felt cold and let down. He tried again.

"I suppose it's almost as engrossing as work, Brown?"

"I guess it's almost as captivating as work, Brown?"

"Yes, sir; almost."

"Yes, sir; nearly."

He said it without a smile, as if he was quite serious. But Tony suspected him of being guileful. Clearly it was useless to prolong the conversation. He sighed.

He said it without smiling, as if he was dead serious. But Tony suspected he was being deceitful. It was obviously pointless to keep the conversation going. He sighed.

"Well, I must look for my friend. Good-by, Brown. Do come and talk to me about work sometime, when the lady is otherwise engaged."

"Well, I need to find my friend. Goodbye, Brown. Please come and chat with me about work sometime, when the lady is occupied."

"Thank you, sir."

"Thanks, sir."

Tony moved off to find Robert. He was discovered in the kitchen-garden, pretending to admire vegetable-marrows. Mrs. Peters was hovering grimly in the rear, a silent watchful figure. The vicar was dilating on the excellence of marrow jam. After saying good-by, Tony and Robert went off to the inn. The vicar turned to his wife with a smile.

Tony went off to find Robert. He was found in the vegetable garden, pretending to admire the squash. Mrs. Peters was standing silently in the back, watching closely. The vicar was extolling the virtues of marrow jam. After saying goodbye, Tony and Robert headed to the inn. The vicar turned to his wife with a smile.

"Quite a pleasant afternoon, my dear. I like Mr. Bangs. Mr. Wild, too, is amusing, though cynical. But we mustn't judge too harshly—perhaps he has had a disappointment and his cynicism is half-assumed. Undoubtedly humorous and clever. Some of his shots hit the mark."

"Such a lovely afternoon, my dear. I like Mr. Bangs. Mr. Wild is entertaining too, although he's a bit cynical. But we shouldn't be too quick to judge—maybe he’s been let down, and his cynicism is partly for show. He’s definitely funny and smart. Some of his remarks really hit home."

"You think so?" said Mrs. Peters icily. "I dislike them both. Mr. Bangs, to say the least, is anything but quiet; Mr. Wild, I am sure, is a man who has had a gentleman's education and lapsed. Superficially clever, perhaps, but vulgar. You made a mistake in taking them up."

"You think so?" Mrs. Peters replied coldly. "I can't stand either of them. Mr. Bangs, to put it mildly, is definitely not quiet; Mr. Wild, I’m sure, is a man who had a gentleman's education but has fallen from grace. Maybe he seems clever on the surface, but he's just tacky. You made a mistake by getting involved with them."

"No, no, my dear! Be a little more charitable——"

"No, no, my dear! Be a little more generous——"

"A great mistake, Charles. But you always think you know best. What I insist on is principle. Nothing can compensate for the lack of that. Principle above cleverness——"

"A huge mistake, Charles. But you always think you know better. What I care about is principle. Nothing can make up for the absence of that. Principle over cleverness——"

The vicar laughed good-naturedly.

The pastor laughed cheerfully.

"Why! what a dragon of virtue——"

"Wow! What a total virtue monster——"

He got no farther. Mrs. Peters suddenly assumed so dreadful an aspect that he shrank aghast and began to fumble for excuses.

He didn't get any further. Mrs. Peters suddenly looked so terrifying that he recoiled in shock and started to fumble for excuses.


CHAPTER XIX

THE PLOT AGAIN THICKENS

At the end of three more days Lionel was feeling a little ill-used. There was still no word from Beatrice, and the watching brief he held began to look like a permanency. A sinecure, you remark disparagingly, or (with an envious inflection) a soft job. Lionel had a roof above him, luxurious food, money in his pocket and a pretty hostess: he would be a churl who grumbled, a witless being who did not know when he was well off.

At the end of three more days, Lionel was starting to feel a bit mistreated. There was still no news from Beatrice, and the role he was playing started to seem permanent. A cushy position, you might say dismissively, or (with a hint of jealousy) an easy gig. Lionel had a roof over his head, good food, cash in his pocket, and a charming hostess: he'd be ungrateful if he complained, a clueless person who couldn’t see how well he had it.

But nevertheless he grumbled. He wanted to be up and doing. Dalliance was delightful, no doubt, and he could thoroughly enjoy so pleasant a pastime. But he required a soupçon of the serious to edge his palate for frivolity, and not a single olive had been sent him from headquarters. Beatrice might have written, surely: not necessarily a letter, but a note, a telegram, even a picture post-card was not too much to have expected. After all, he was a human being trying to do her a good turn. She might, if she liked, consider him in the light of a dog; but even a dog demands an occasional pat.

But still, he complained. He wanted to be active and engaged. Flirting was fun, no doubt, and he could really enjoy such a nice way to pass the time. But he needed a bit of seriousness to balance out all the lightheartedness, and not a single message had come from headquarters. Beatrice could have reached out, surely: not necessarily a letter, but a note, a text, even a postcard wasn’t too much to ask. After all, he was a guy trying to help her out. She could, if she wanted, think of him as a dog; but even a dog deserves some affection every now and then.

Yes, Beatrice had been a little inconsiderate. When they met again he would subtly convey that she had not been quite so perfect in her handling of the case as she might have been. Not blame—oh, no! that would be too severe. But a touch of respectful and adoring frigidity—a hint of polite and ardent disappointment, that was the note to be struck. It would add to the subsequent reconciliation, or rather readjustment. Iced champagne, in short, followed by liquor brandy. Finally (perhaps ... who knows?) a mixture of the two, compounding that exhilarating beverage, king's peg.

Yes, Beatrice had been a bit thoughtless. When they met again, he would subtly let her know that she hadn’t handled the case as perfectly as she could have. Not blame—oh, no! That would be too harsh. But a touch of respectful and adoring coldness—a hint of polite yet fervent disappointment, that was the note to hit. It would enhance the later reconciliation, or rather readjustment. Chilled champagne, in short, followed by brandy. Finally (maybe ... who knows?) a mix of the two, creating that invigorating drink, king's peg.

But that could only be drunk post-mortem.... Poor, dear old Lukos.... Well, for the present he must sport the blue ribbon....

But that could only be drunk after death... Poor, dear old Lukos... Well, for now he must wear the blue ribbon...

But a dog will have its pat: if the mistress will not give it, another may; and who can blame the devoted creature if it lingers piteously hard by a stranger? Again, why blame the stranger, moved doubtless by a kindly and an unselfish impulse? Why blame Miss Arkwright, in short, for growing daily more cordial, more appreciative, more anxious to oblige with the pat? Lionel was obeying the orders of Beatrice, to watch and do the bidding of his hostess; he could not be expected to damp her graciousness, check her enthusiasm: had he done so, he might have sealed the source of some important information. He must endure the pat, suffer it, permit, accept, not refuse; but ... welcome?

But a dog will always seek affection: if its owner won’t give it, someone else might; and who can blame the loyal animal for lingering pitifully near a stranger? Again, why hold the stranger accountable, who is surely responding to a kind and selfless impulse? Why blame Miss Arkwright, after all, for becoming increasingly friendly, more appreciative, and more eager to offer affection? Lionel was following Beatrice’s instructions to observe and support his hostess; he couldn’t be expected to dampen her warmth or curb her enthusiasm. If he had done that, he might have missed out on some valuable information. He had to accept the affection, endure it, allow it, not refuse it; but ... welcome?

He was talking to her in the garden one afternoon. They had begun the conversation on some trivial theme, soon tossed aside for a subject of substance. It was not long before they were on the time-worn topic, the war of the sexes. Miss Arkwright, it appeared, was a suffragette—not militant, certainly, but convinced and ardent. She expressed surprise that Lionel did not take similar views. "For you," she said sweetly, "are a reasonable fair-minded man. And I should think," she added mischievously, "that you have many friends who might convert you."

He was talking to her in the garden one afternoon. They had started the conversation on some light topic, which was soon set aside for something more serious. It didn't take long for them to dive into the age-old discussion, the battle of the sexes. Miss Arkwright, it turned out, was a suffragette—not radical, for sure, but passionate and convinced. She seemed surprised that Lionel didn’t share her views. "Because you," she said sweetly, "are a reasonable, fair-minded guy. And I would think," she added playfully, "that you have plenty of friends who might convince you."

"It isn't my brain that wants conversion," he replied meditatively. "Most of the arguments are on the women's side. Logic tells me they should have the vote; feeling—and by feeling I don't mean prejudice or bigotry, but something deeper—recoils from the idea of women in parliament. And it would mean that in the long-run. Let us keep them out of the dirty work."

"It’s not my brain that wants a change," he said thoughtfully. "Most of the arguments favor women. Logic tells me they should have the vote; however, my feelings—and by feelings, I don’t mean bias or intolerance, but something deeper—react against the idea of women in parliament. And that would have long-term consequences. Let’s keep them out of the messy stuff."

"They might cleanse the stables."

"They might clean the stables."

"I'd rather not. We're cleansing them gradually, one hopes: at any rate, it's not a woman's job."

"I'd prefer not to. We're gradually cleaning them up, hopefully: in any case, it's not a woman's responsibility."

"Our view is that all jobs should be women's."

"Our perspective is that all jobs should be for women."

"Impossible." He shook his head. "I'm one of the old-fashioned believers in the home as woman's sphere——"

"That's not possible." He shook his head. "I’m one of those traditional believers that the home is a woman's place—"

"And the thousands of unmarried workers? You forget them."

"And what about the thousands of single workers? You’re overlooking them."

"Hard, I grant you, but they're a minority. Most women have the home sphere. Mind, I don't believe in inequality as regards laws: they should be the same for both."

"Sure, it's tough, but they're a minority. Most women are in the domestic sphere. Just to be clear, I don't believe in inequality when it comes to laws: they should be the same for everyone."

"Yes," she said with a bitterness that surprised him, "look at the inequalities of divorce, for instance."

"Yeah," she said sharply, surprising him, "just look at the unfairness of divorce, for example."

"We'll discuss that presently. Look for a moment at the reverse of the medal. Hasn't woman got the pull in influence? Can't she sway men without the vote?"

"We'll talk about that soon. Take a look at the back of the medal for a moment. Doesn't woman have the advantage in influence? Can't she sway men without voting?"

"A pretty woman or a clever woman can. Not the others."

"A pretty woman or a smart woman can. Not the others."

"Ye—es. Sex counts."

"Yes. Sex matters."

"So you leave us the weapon of the coquette? That's what it amounts to. Is that a desirable weapon? Besides, it's double-edged."

"So you leave us the tool of the flirt? That's what it comes down to. Is that a useful tool? Plus, it's double-edged."

"Rather a crude way of putting it," he said a little uncomfortably. "Nature has given you a power you can use for good. Why not use it?"

"That's a bit blunt," he said, feeling a bit awkward. "Nature has given you a gift that you can use for good. Why not take advantage of it?"

"But is it so powerful?"

"But is it that powerful?"

"On dit."

"People say."

"What do you think?" She bent forward, leaning to him, smiling audaciously in his eyes. Lionel would have been more than human if he had not felt flattered. This delightful creature, whom at a first meeting he had thought prudish and narrow, had developed amazingly. Companionship for a fortnight with a gay man of spirit and address, who did not lack a generous nature, had brought the bud to blossom. Now as she smiled on him with inviting eyes he felt strongly tempted to complete her education with a kiss. He temporized.

"What do you think?" She leaned in closer, looking straight into his eyes with a bold smile. Lionel would have had to be more than human not to feel flattered. This charming woman, whom he had initially thought was prissy and uptight, had grown so much. After spending two weeks with a lively, engaging man who had a generous spirit, she had truly blossomed. Now, as she smiled at him with eyes full of invitation, he felt a strong urge to further her education with a kiss. He hesitated.

"What does it matter what I think?"

"What does it matter what I think?"

"It may matter a good deal," she said with a meaning he could not fathom.

"It might matter a lot," she said, with a meaning he couldn't understand.

"Tell me."

"Tell me."

She explained herself curiously. Instead of speaking she was silent for a moment, as if choosing a course. Then with a friendly abandon she rested her hands lightly on his shoulders and said, "No. You shall tell me." Then she waited for the inevitable kiss.

She explained herself with curiosity. Instead of speaking, she paused for a moment, as if deciding what to do. Then, with a friendly ease, she placed her hands lightly on his shoulders and said, "No. You’re going to tell me." Then she waited for the expected kiss.

Man is a strange animal. (I apologize for this truism, but, really, Lionel himself must be my excuse.) A man may be a savage, a knave, a brute, but beneath every human bosom there lurk some seeds of nobility, however few and atrophied. Juvenile literature abounds with loci classici. The thief who breaks into the night nursery is subdued by the innocent prattle of Baby Tumkins; the drunken osler in the "Pig and Whistle" is sobered by the consumptive angel who lisps, "Daddy, dear daddy, do come home!" The blasphemous ravisher, mad in the hour of victory, is tamed by the sight of a locket ("Heavens! how came this here? Tell me, girl!") and drops his prey with an oath that is half a prayer. And so on ... one need not accumulate examples.

Man is a strange creature. (I know this is a cliché, but honestly, Lionel himself must be my justification.) A person can be a savage, a rogue, a brute, but deep down in every human being, there are some seeds of nobility, no matter how few and neglected. Children's literature is filled with classic examples. The thief who breaks into a nursery is calmed by the innocent chatter of Baby Tumkins; the drunken caretaker in the "Pig and Whistle" is brought back to reality by the sickly angel who whispers, "Daddy, dear daddy, please come home!" The blasphemous offender, mad with victory, is softened by the sight of a locket ("Heavens! How did this get here? Tell me, girl!") and drops his victim with an oath that’s half a prayer. And so on... there's no need to gather more examples.

Lionel did not kiss Miss Arkwright. Though he had dwelt on the possibility, hoped for it, almost schemed and certainly desired; though he had decided that his grass-bachelorship permitted such a kiss as was now offered, he refused. Why? Partly, no doubt, because a kiss won by half-forceful methods is worth more than a tribute freely offered; partly because the offer tends to congeal the blood and curb the desire—the ideal has stooped and taken a few inches off her goddess statue; partly, too (the moralist will be glad to note), because he remembered Beatrice.

Lionel didn’t kiss Miss Arkwright. Even though he had thought about the possibility, hoped for it, almost planned for it, and definitely wanted it; even though he had decided that being a bachelor allowed for the kiss she was now offering, he declined. Why? Partly because a kiss that’s somewhat forced feels more valuable than a freely given one; partly because the proposition tends to freeze feelings and dampen desire—the ideal has come down a few pegs from its pedestal; and partly, too (the moralist will be pleased to see), because he remembered Beatrice.

Seeds of nobility? One must suppose it. Perhaps a sense, dim-recognized, that the cheapening of ideals by frequent draughts at wayside fountains lessens the value and appreciation of the ultimate prize. Men find it hard to resist a drink. If they could look forward with assurance to the final realization of their hopes there would be fewer loveless marriages, fewer abandoned maidens, fewer degenerate men. But they feel that youth slips by—the ideal woman is hard to find, harder to win: why not sip the pleasant fountain that will slake them for a moment? So, vogue la galère! We will have one swig before we die—a good swig to drown regret: if we find it is not Veuve Clicquot but only muddy ale, at least we can get drunk on one as well as the other.

Seeds of nobility? One might think so. Perhaps there's a vague awareness that constantly indulging at earthly fountains diminishes the value and appreciation of the ultimate reward. People struggle to resist a drink. If they could confidently anticipate the fulfillment of their dreams, there would be fewer loveless marriages, fewer abandoned women, and fewer degenerate men. But they sense that youth is slipping away—the ideal partner is hard to find, even harder to win: why not enjoy a quick drink that will satisfy them for a moment? So, vogue la galère! We'll take one last drink before we go—a good drink to drown out regret: if we realize it’s not fine champagne but just mediocre beer, at least we can get drunk on either one.

These profound reflections did not present themselves so lucidly to Lionel as to the temperate reader who never gets drunk—never so much as sips. He comprehended them vaguely, unconsciously almost, in the thought, "Oh, damn! she's not Beatrice—she's not Beatrice—I can't." A man of unsettled purpose, you perceive, who had mapped his course of pleasure and then forsaken it, vacillating, lukewarm, halting between two opinions. "The evil that I would, I do not!" he thought in humorous astonishment at himself; and then aloud, "I am at a loss for words."

These deep thoughts didn't come to Lionel as clearly as they did to a sober reader who never drinks—who doesn’t even take a sip. He understood them somewhat, almost unconsciously, with the thought, "Oh, damn! She's not Beatrice—she's not Beatrice—I can't." He was a man without a clear direction, someone who had planned his fun but then abandoned it, wavering, indifferent, stuck between two choices. "The bad things I want to do, I don't!" he thought, humorously surprised by himself; and then said out loud, "I'm at a loss for words."

He felt rather a fool, but was pleased to note that Miss Arkwright looked neither ill-at-ease nor disappointed. He searched her countenance for a hint of contempt, but found none. Dropping her hands with an unaffected laugh she said, "You are duller than I thought, Mr. Mortimer. Come! let us go and see if they have brought tea out yet." They turned, and suddenly her face flushed scarlet. She drew in her breath sharply. Forbes was coming across the lawn, followed by the ambassador.

He felt a bit foolish, but he was glad to see that Miss Arkwright didn’t look uncomfortable or let down. He looked for any sign of disdain on her face but found none. With a carefree laugh, she said, "You’re more boring than I expected, Mr. Mortimer. Come on! Let’s go see if they’ve set out the tea yet." They turned, and suddenly her face turned bright red. She gasped. Forbes was walking across the lawn, followed by the ambassador.

She ran forward and shook hands, murmuring something Lionel did not hear. Then, as Forbes retired, she introduced the two men: "Mr. Mortimer—Mr. Beckett." Lionel surveyed the ambassador with curiosity, his late-lulled suspicions once more awake. What was he doing here? Mr. Beckett returned the scrutiny something in the manner of a jealous lover who would like an explanation of a stranger's presence. But he was a diplomatic gentleman, and it was with a slight laugh, merry and sincere, that he held out his hand.

She rushed over and shook hands, quietly saying something that Lionel didn’t catch. Then, as Forbes left, she introduced the two men: "Mr. Mortimer—Mr. Beckett." Lionel looked at the ambassador with interest, his earlier suspicions stirring back to life. What was he doing here? Mr. Beckett returned the look like a jealous lover wanting to know why a stranger was around. But being a diplomatic gentleman, he gave a small laugh that was light and genuine as he extended his hand.

"We have met before," he said in a friendly fashion, "but under less happy auspices. Mr. Mortimer, you saw me under a cloud. I was exceedingly rude. You who are a golfer will readily find excuses, I hope. I am very sorry."

"We’ve met before," he said casually, "but not in the best circumstances. Mr. Mortimer, you saw me when I was having a rough day. I was really rude. I hope you, being a golfer, can understand that. I’m truly sorry."

Miss Arkwright's eyes looked anxiously upon them. When had they met and where? How odd that he had never mentioned it once! She must hear the story of their meeting; and "rude"—what did he mean by that?

Miss Arkwright's eyes looked anxiously at them. When had they met and where? How strange that he had never mentioned it! She needed to hear the story of their meeting; and "rude"—what did he mean by that?

Lionel smiled and referred her to the ambassador. He, genuinely anxious to atone for a foolish contretemps, did not spare himself in the recital. Miss Arkwright laughed gaily over the tale.

Lionel smiled and directed her to the ambassador. He, truly eager to make up for a silly mishap, held nothing back in the story. Miss Arkwright laughed cheerfully at the tale.

"Men are so silly," she said merrily as he finished. "Fancy getting angry over a game of golf! And all by yourself, too! If there had been some one to vent your rage upon——"

"Men are so silly," she said playfully as he wrapped up. "Can you believe getting angry over a game of golf? And all by yourself, no less! If only there had been someone to take out your frustration on——"

"Alas, there was!" said Mr. Beckett, with a whimsical glance at Lionel, who, despite himself and his suspicions, felt drawn toward the enemy. It was a friendly party of three that walked toward the summer-house.

"Unfortunately, there was!" said Mr. Beckett, with a playful look at Lionel, who, despite his doubts and suspicions, felt pulled toward the opposing side. It was a friendly group of three that approached the summer-house.

On the whole, tea was a successful meal. Miss Arkwright led the conversation—monopolized it, almost; hardly pausing for replies, agreement, or contradiction. She looked splendid, her color heightened with pleasure, excitement, or kindred emotions. Lionel, who had studied her attentively for no short period, had never seen her in such a mood. She was gay and charming, unusually ready with the froth of sparkling small-talk. Any one meeting her for the first time would have believed her a clever flaneuse, a butterfly with brains and beauty, living solely for the moment. But Lionel, who knew her better and had some secret knowledge of her possibilities for intrigue and conspiracy, found himself questioning. Was she nervous? And if so, of what?

Overall, tea turned out to be a successful gathering. Miss Arkwright took charge of the conversation—almost dominated it; she hardly paused for replies, agreement, or disagreement. She looked spectacular, her complexion glowing with pleasure, excitement, or similar emotions. Lionel, who had been watching her closely for some time, had never seen her in such a mood. She was lively and charming, unusually adept at light, sparkling conversation. Anyone meeting her for the first time would have assumed she was a savvy flaneuse, a beautiful butterfly with brains, focused entirely on enjoying the moment. But Lionel, who knew her better and had some insider awareness of her capacity for intrigue and conspiracy, found himself questioning. Was she anxious? And if so, why?

Mr. Beckett had little opportunity to display his social gifts. The abilities, doubtless great to secure his present office, perforce lay hidden. But the few sentences he uttered, by way of confirmation or its opposite, were enough to show him as a man of original thought, some wit, and in close touch with the affairs of nations. An old man, he bore his years lightly; though the mask of frivolity he assumed out of compliment to his environment was occasionally dropped in moments of repose. At such moments he appeared tired—not physically, but of mundane trivialities.

Mr. Beckett had little chance to show off his social skills. The abilities that had undoubtedly helped him secure his current position remained largely hidden. However, the few sentences he spoke, whether to confirm or contradict something, were enough to reveal him as a man of original ideas, some wit, and a good grasp of international affairs. As an older man, he carried his age lightly; although he often put on a mask of lightheartedness to fit in with those around him, he would sometimes let it drop during quiet moments. In those times, he looked tired—not physically, but weary of everyday trivialities.

At last Winifred rose. "You know my routine," she said brightly to Lionel: "I must vanish speedily. No! don't move. Stay here and smoke. I shall escort Mr. Beckett——"

At last, Winifred got up. "You know my routine," she said cheerfully to Lionel. "I have to leave quickly. No! Don’t move. Stay here and smoke. I’ll take Mr. Beckett——"

"You still, then——" began the ambassador, rising at the hint. She interrupted him bruskly.

"You still, then——" began the ambassador, standing up at the hint. She cut him off abruptly.

"Still—still—still! Are we not always 'stilling'? I wonder that a man of your experience finds anything remarkable in that. Oh, do not interrupt!"—for he made a deprecating gesture, opening his mouth to speak—"I will hear no excuses for banality. 'The ringing grooves of change' is pure fallacy; change is absent; only the grooves remain. We are what we are. As it was in the beginning, is now, and—do I shock you?" she asked abruptly, turning to Lionel.

"Still—still—still! Aren't we always 'stilling'? I'm surprised that someone with your experience finds that surprising. Oh, please don’t interrupt!"—because he started to make a gesture to speak—"I won’t accept any excuses for being boring. 'The ringing grooves of change' is just nonsense; change isn’t really happening; only the grooves are left. We are who we are. As it was in the beginning, is now, and—am I shocking you?" she asked suddenly, looking at Lionel.

"Surprise; not shock," he smiled.

"Surprise, not shock," he smiled.

"Then you owe me a debt of gratitude. Surprise is one of nature's best gifts, but at our mature age she is parsimonious. Don't you agree, Mr. Beckett?"

"Then you owe me a thank you. Surprise is one of nature's greatest gifts, but at our age, it's pretty stingy. Don’t you think so, Mr. Beckett?"

He, too, smiled, but mournfully.

He smiled, but sadly.

"I have more need to count my birthdays than you," he said. "If your surprises are few, how many can I hope for?"

"I need to keep track of my birthdays more than you do," he said. "If you don't have many surprises, how many can I expect?"

"Nil desperandum!" she said cheerfully and less self-consciously, taking him, comrade-like, by the arm. "Come and find your motor: perhaps a surprise is waiting—some ragamuffin may have put a penknife through the tire!"

"Don't worry!" she said cheerfully and with more confidence, taking him by the arm like a buddy. "Come on, let's find your car: maybe there's a surprise waiting—some kid might have poked a hole in the tire!"

"I hope not!" he said more briskly. "As it has only just come from London this afternoon to take me back after my holiday, I don't want to be balked at the outset. Well, good-by, Mr. Mortimer."

"I hope not!" he said more cheerfully. "Since it just arrived from London this afternoon to bring me back after my holiday, I don't want to be held up right from the start. Well, goodbye, Mr. Mortimer."

"Good-by," said Lionel, shaking hands. "No chance of seeing you down here again presently, I suppose?"

"Goodbye," said Lionel, shaking hands. "I guess there's no chance of seeing you down here again anytime soon?"

"Who knows?" said Miss Arkwright vivaciously, taking the words from his lips. "A dashing adventurer like Mr. Beckett, whose only serious business is golf——"

"Who knows?" said Miss Arkwright energetically, echoing his thoughts. "A charming adventurer like Mr. Beckett, whose main focus is golf——"

She did not finish the sentence, but led him off, protesting that the slander was ill-deserved. Lionel watched them disappear, heavy with thought.

She didn’t finish the sentence but took him away, insisting that the gossip was completely unfounded. Lionel watched them walk away, deep in thought.

Miss Arkwright did not come back. He was glad of her absence, for he could only think, and think, and think again what it all meant, trying to find some key to the perpetual problem. There were Beatrice, Winifred and the ambassador forever whirling through his brain, suggesting, perplexing, questioning. Where was the clew? If only he could put his hand on some definite idea, some shred of coherence in the whole amazing scheme! Beatrice had warned him that her sister and "Mr. Beckett" were conspiring. Good: that was definite, and the ambassador's visit was proof of fellowship—in what? High politics? The life of Lukos? It seemed so unlikely in this pleasant English garden, but the facts were stubborn. Then he had not heard from Beatrice. He had thought she and Winifred might be identical.... Stay! he had discarded that.... Let us begin again from another point. Why had Winifred invited his amorous interest? She—but Beatrice had warned him—unnecessarily, had been his foolish thought—against the wiles of Winifred. Her seductive friendship had been simply a trap ... but, no! the remembrance of his recent delectable danger, the sincerity of her—love? the faith of her eyes—all denied a trap. Winifred could not be a conspirator; at worst she must be a half-hearted conspirator who had begun to sympathize with her enemies. But if that were so, she must soon be on the side of Beatrice, of whom she would speedily be jealous! His brain reeled.

Miss Arkwright didn't come back. He was glad she was gone because he could think, and think, and think again about what it all meant, trying to find some clue to the ongoing mystery. Beatrice, Winifred, and the ambassador kept swirling in his mind, suggesting, confusing, questioning. Where was the clue? If only he could grasp some clear idea, some piece of coherence in this whole incredible situation! Beatrice had warned him that her sister and "Mr. Beckett" were plotting. Good: that was concrete, and the ambassador's visit was proof of their connection—in what? High-stakes politics? The life of Lukos? It seemed so unlikely in this charming English garden, but the facts were undeniable. Then he hadn’t heard from Beatrice. He had thought she and Winifred might be the same person.... Wait! he had dismissed that idea.... Let’s start again from a different angle. Why had Winifred shown interest in him? She—but Beatrice had warned him—unnecessarily, he had foolishly thought—about Winifred's tricks. Her enchanting friendship had felt like a trap... but, no! the memory of his recent thrilling danger, the sincerity of her—love? the trust in her eyes—all contradicted the trap idea. Winifred couldn’t be a conspirator; at worst, she had to be a half-hearted conspirator who had started to sympathize with her enemies. But if that were true, she would soon side with Beatrice, whom she would quickly become jealous of! His mind was spinning.

The sum of his perplexed musings was that he must keep his eyes open,—a poor result for so much mental effort. That, however, was all he achieved by dinner-time, and he sucked small comfort therefrom. "I am not made for detective work," he reflected gloomily as he played with dinner. "I went into this adventure too light-heartedly. I thought it a game.... So it is, and deucedly exciting now, but I don't seem to have mastered the rules. A blind man in a total eclipse looking for something that isn't there,—that's Lionel Mortimer, Esquire. Old man, you'd better have a drink."

The result of his confused thoughts was that he needed to stay alert—a disappointing outcome given all the mental effort. By dinner time, that was all he managed, and it gave him little comfort. "I'm not cut out for detective work," he thought sadly as he picked at his dinner. "I approached this adventure too carefree. I thought it was a game... And it is, and it’s ridiculously thrilling now, but I just don’t seem to have figured out the rules. A blind guy in a total eclipse searching for something that isn’t there—that’s me, Lionel Mortimer. Old man, you’d better have a drink."

Sensations were crowding thick upon him. His uneventful fortnight was to bear a heavy interest within a few brief hours. In the library, after further futile pondering, he tried to distract his thoughts with books. It was a failure; he could not concentrate his attention on printed words for more than five minutes together. Always he came back to Beatrice and the ramifications reaching from Constantinople to London and thence to Shereling. With a grunt of dissatisfaction, he got up at last at eleven o'clock and knocked out his pipe upon the hearth. As he did this he heard a slight crunch as of a foot upon the gravel. He turned quickly toward the French window and saw that he had forgotten to draw down the blind. He saw something else as well. For a brief second Lionel had a glimpse—the barest glimpse—of a white face pressed against the pane, watching. The face vanished almost before the retina had time to record the impression, but he knew two things at once—it was a man's face, and a man he had never seen before.

Sensations were overwhelming him. His uneventful two weeks were about to take a significant turn in just a few hours. In the library, after more pointless thinking, he attempted to distract himself with books. It didn’t work; he couldn't focus on the printed words for more than five minutes. He kept returning to thoughts of Beatrice and the connections stretching from Constantinople to London and then to Shereling. With a frustrated grunt, he finally got up at eleven o'clock and knocked out his pipe on the hearth. As he did this, he heard a slight crunch, like someone stepping on gravel. He quickly turned toward the French window and realized he had forgotten to pull down the blind. He saw something else too. For a brief moment, Lionel caught the slightest glimpse of a white face pressed against the glass, watching. The face disappeared almost before he could register the impression, but he knew two things immediately—it was a man's face, and it was someone he had never seen before.

Lionel did exactly what you and I would have done. He stood stock-still for a moment, his heart clop-clopping against his ribs as if intent on bursting its way through to the light, hammering a Morse message—"You are badly frightened, you are badly frightened, you are badly frightened." "Yes," said Lionel, after three seconds' pardonable collapse, "I am; but I'll try to frighten the other chap!" And with laudable swiftness he ran to the window, threw it open and called, "Who's there?"

Lionel did exactly what you and I would have done. He froze for a moment, his heart pounding against his ribs as if trying to break free, sending a signal—"You are really scared, you are really scared, you are really scared." "Yes," said Lionel, after a brief moment of understandable panic, "I am; but I'll try to scare the other guy!" And with impressive speed, he ran to the window, threw it open, and called out, "Who's there?"

Of course there was no answer. With a thawing of the faculties he ran back, seized the poker and turned off the light. Then he stepped outside to look for the night-prowler, longing for some tangible flesh to beat into a pulp.

Of course, there was no answer. With a clearer mind, he ran back, grabbed the poker, and turned off the light. Then he stepped outside to search for the nighttime intruder, eager to find some real person to beat into a pulp.

The night was starless. Not a breath of wind stirred the leaves. Not a bird twittered a hint of ambush. Not a sound on gravel or swish of dew-laden grass brushed by a spy's foot promised vengeance. Aglow with eagerness now that action was possible and a clew at hand, he walked round the house, eyes and ears alert for the marauder. There was nothing to be seen. It was only too clear that the watcher by night had escaped the moment he was seen, and no good purpose could be served by a random pursuit in the dark. Lionel went back to the library, secured the windows and lighted a fresh pipe.

The night was pitch black, with no stars in sight. Not a single breeze rustled the leaves. Not a bird chirped to signal danger. There were no sounds on the gravel or the swish of dew-covered grass that hinted at a spy's approach and promised revenge. Filled with excitement now that action was possible and a clue was within reach, he walked around the house, eyes and ears on high alert for the intruder. There was nothing to see. It was all too clear that the nighttime watcher had slipped away the moment he was spotted, and chasing him blindly in the dark wouldn’t achieve anything. Lionel returned to the library, secured the windows, and lit a fresh pipe.

Of course he could not arouse the house. If, as seemed certain, this watcher were a Turkish spy, it would be absurd to enlist Miss Arkwright's aid. Better to say nothing, still watch—but even more narrowly—and ... go to bed.

Of course, he couldn’t alert the house. If, as seemed likely, this watcher was a Turkish spy, it would be ridiculous to get Miss Arkwright involved. It was better to say nothing, keep watching—but even more closely—and... go to bed.

It was a quarter to twelve when he went up-stairs, still smoking. His bedroom lay at the end of a short passage. Anxious not to disturb any one at that unseasonable hour, he took off his slippers at the foot of the stairs and advanced in his "stocking-feet." Without the slightest noise he tiptoed along the corridor. Just before he reached his room another door was opened, very quietly indeed, upon his right. A line of light cut the blackness, and Lionel stood still involuntarily, without purpose, waiting, expectant of something, he knew not what. The door opened wide, and a girl in a pretty pink dressing-gown came out. It was not Winifred who threw up her hands at the sight of the waiting Lionel. It was Mizzi.

It was a quarter to twelve when he went upstairs, still smoking. His bedroom was at the end of a short hallway. Trying not to disturb anyone at that late hour, he took off his slippers at the bottom of the stairs and walked in his "stocking feet." Without making a sound, he tiptoed down the corridor. Just as he reached his room, another door opened very quietly on his right. A beam of light cut through the darkness, and Lionel stood still, unthinkingly, waiting, expecting something he couldn’t quite identify. The door swung open wide, and a girl in a cute pink dressing gown stepped out. It wasn't Winifred who threw up her hands at the sight of Lionel standing there; it was Mizzi.


CHAPTER XX

THRILL UPON THRILL

This time Lionel had himself well in hand: he was ready for anything. It was no occasion for tenderness or chivalry: brusk silent action was the cue. Seizing the stricken Mizzi by the arm with one hand, he clapped the other over her mouth to prevent a scream. Then half-pushing, half-dragging, he forced her along the few remaining yards that separated them from his bedroom. She struggled at first, but soon realized her helplessness and allowed him to have his way. When he had her safely inside, Lionel locked the door quietly and sat down in high feather on the bed. He felt he was beginning to earn his salary at last.

This time, Lionel was completely in control: he was prepared for anything. It wasn’t a moment for kindness or heroics; quick, silent action was the plan. Grabbing the shaken Mizzi by the arm with one hand, he covered her mouth with the other to stop her from screaming. Then, half-pushing and half-dragging, he brought her the few remaining yards to his bedroom. She fought back at first, but soon understood her powerlessness and let him lead her. Once he had her safely inside, Lionel quietly locked the door and sat down on the bed, feeling like he was finally earning his pay.

"Do sit down," he suggested politely. "We must have quite a long conversation before we part. I can recommend the armchair."

"Please have a seat," he said kindly. "We need to have a pretty lengthy conversation before we say goodbye. I recommend the armchair."

Mizzi shrugged her shoulders philosophically and obeyed. She was breathing a little quickly from the capture; but Lionel noticed that she was as charming as ever, and his heart harbored a rebellious thought. "Hard luck that I seem to be always trying to snare a pretty girl!" he mused. "Well, it must be no nonsense now, my friend. Saint Anthony, forward!" He studied Mizzi's face attentively for a minute, and then asked bluntly, "Now, will you kindly tell me what you have done with those papers?"

Mizzi shrugged her shoulders in a thoughtful way and went along with it. She was breathing a bit fast from the capture, but Lionel noticed she was just as charming as always, and a rebellious thought crossed his mind. "How unlucky that I always seem to be trying to catch a pretty girl!" he thought. "Well, no messing around now, my friend. Saint Anthony, let’s go!" He looked closely at Mizzi’s face for a minute and then asked directly, "Now, could you please tell me what you did with those papers?"

"What papers?" she asked with surpassing innocence. "I have no idea what you mean."

"What papers?" she asked with complete innocence. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, don't be silly!" he said impatiently. "Why need we beat about the bush? You know well enough. Explain."

"Oh, come on!" he said, annoyed. "Why do we need to dance around the issue? You know the answer. Just explain."

"I know this," she said viciously, "that you find me coming from my room, fall upon me like an Apache, drag me here at this unseemly hour and lock me in! And you ask me to explain! The explanation is due from you. Have you never heard of les convenances—what you English call Mrs. Grundy?"

"I know this," she said angrily, "that you see me coming out of my room, pounce on me like a wild animal, drag me here at this ridiculous hour, and lock me in! And you expect me to explain! The explanation is owed to you. Haven't you ever heard of les convenances—what you English call Mrs. Grundy?"

"She's snoring now," he smiled. "I shan't wake her."

"She's snoring now," he smiled. "I won't wake her."

Mizzi rose with dignity and marched to the door, nose in the air. "If you are a gentleman," she said scornfully, "you will release me at once."

Mizzi stood up with confidence and walked to the door, holding her head high. "If you're a gentleman," she said with disdain, "you’ll let me go right now."

"Afterward," he replied without moving. He sensed his triumph already.

"Afterward," he said without moving. He could already feel his victory.

"After what?"

"After what happened?"

"Your explanation."

"Your explanation."

She sat down again and looked keenly at him, as if trying to divine the strength of his determination. "I have nothing to explain," she said presently. "If I had, you could not compel me. If you attempt it I shall scream."

She sat down again and looked at him intently, as if trying to gauge how strong his resolve was. "I have nothing to explain," she said after a moment. "Even if I did, you couldn't make me. If you try, I will scream."

"Quite worth trying," he said urbanely. "Start now. I haven't the least objection."

"Definitely worth a shot," he said smoothly. "Go ahead and start now. I have no objections at all."

Mizzi remained silent for several minutes, debating the point. Then she laughed frankly, as if admiring his coolness. "Ah! that's better!" he approved. "Now, perhaps, we shall get on."

Mizzi stayed silent for several minutes, thinking it over. Then she laughed openly, as if appreciating his calmness. "Ah! that's better!" he said with approval. "Now, maybe we can move forward."

"But no!" she said quickly, "I shall not scream, because I am quite capable of taking care of myself. But I will tell you nothing. What next, monsieur?"

"But no!" she said quickly, "I'm not going to scream because I can take care of myself just fine. But I won't tell you anything. What's next, sir?"

Lionel got off the bed and began to fill a pipe in leisurely fashion. "You don't mind me smoking?" he asked formally. "It always helps me." He struck a match and lighted the tobacco, apparently preoccupied. "What next? you ask. This. Have you ever seen that Pinero play, The Gay Lord Quex?"

Lionel got off the bed and casually started to fill a pipe. "You don't mind if I smoke, do you?" he asked politely. "It always helps me." He struck a match and lit the tobacco, seemingly lost in thought. "What’s next, you ask? This. Have you ever seen that Pinero play, The Gay Lord Quex?"

She shook her head, puzzled.

She shook her head, confused.

"Ah! that's a pity, for I am going to borrow a hint if you are difficile. If you refuse to confess I mean to keep you locked up here till the morning."

"Ah! that's a shame, because I’m going to take a hint if you’re being difficult. If you refuse to admit it, I plan to keep you locked up here until morning."

"And then?"

"And what happened next?"

"Then I shall ring for my shaving-water. And where's your character?"

"Then I'll call for my shaving water. And where's your character?"

She bit her lips. "I mistook you for a gentleman."

She bit her lips. "I thought you were a gentleman."

"Ah! that was the fault of the top hat. I'm really a detective and can't afford the luxury of sentiment."

"Ah! that was the problem with the top hat. I'm actually a detective and can't indulge in sentiment."

Mizzi nibbled a finger-nail, and watched him with sparkling eyes. It was clear that she was not at ease, that she had not expected to find him so ready with a plan, so determined in dishonor. Being a woman, it is probable that she did not altogether blame him. Lionel smiled, reading her, as he thought, like a book.

Mizzi nibbled her fingernail and watched him with sparkling eyes. It was obvious that she was uncomfortable, that she hadn’t expected him to be so prepared with a plan and so committed to dishonor. Being a woman, she probably didn’t fully blame him. Lionel smiled, feeling he could read her like a book.

"Well, what is it to be?"

"Well, what’s it going to be?"

She made a disconsolate gesture.

She made a sad gesture.

"You are too strong," she said, and smiled in pitiful appeal. "Ah, monsieur! once you would not have——"

"You’re too strong," she said, smiling in a piteous way. "Oh, sir! once you wouldn’t have——"

"That line is useless," said Lionel brutally. He was playing for high stakes and could not afford to waste a trick. "Once I flirted and had the pleasure of a kiss. Never again, my pretty schemer! So don't try it on!"

"That line is worthless," Lionel said bluntly. He was playing for high stakes and couldn't afford to lose a trick. "I once flirted and enjoyed a kiss. Never again, my pretty schemer! So don’t even think about it!"

She looked bewildered.

She looked confused.

"You misunderstand me cruelly. But as I am to be beaten, let us get to business. What do you wish to know?"

"You misunderstand me completely. But since I’m going to be punished, let’s get to the point. What do you want to know?"

"Where are the papers?"

"Where's the paperwork?"

She did not attempt to parry now. "They are not in this house."

She didn't try to dodge anymore. "They aren't in this house."

"That is a lie."

"That's a lie."

She shrugged again.

She shrugged once more.

"Monsieur is not discriminating. I tell you the truth. I took the papers and have hidden them. They are not here. If you like, here are my keys"—she held them out—"you may search my boxes."

"Monsieur is not picky. I'm telling you the truth. I took the papers and hid them. They’re not here. If you want, here are my keys"—she held them out—"you can search my boxes."

He looked steadily at her. There was no wavering in her tone, no weakness in the eyes or mouth. Belief was imperative.

He stared at her unwaveringly. There was no doubt in her voice, no frailty in her eyes or lips. Conviction was essential.

"Very well," he said. "Where have you hidden them?"

"Alright," he said. "Where did you hide them?"

"I will not tell you that."

"I'm not sharing that."

"You know the penalty?"

"Do you know the penalty?"

"Yes, and I do not care. I tell you so much, but not that."

"Yeah, and I don't care. I'm telling you a lot, but not that."

Her voice was so inflexible, so cold and so indifferent that he felt defeat at hand.

Her voice was so rigid, so cold, and so indifferent that he felt defeat was near.

"Leave it for the present, then. Have you sold them?"

"Let's set that aside for now. Have you sold them?"

"No. They would not pay the price."

"No. They weren't willing to pay the price."

"And you are waiting till they increase their offer?"

"And you're waiting until they raise their offer?"

"Perhaps."

"Maybe."

"Perhaps!" he echoed. "But you mean to sell them?"

"Maybe!" he replied. "But you plan to sell them?"

She smiled faintly.

She gave a faint smile.

"Perhaps. I may have stolen them for other motives than money. Enough that I stole them and will not tell you where they are."

"Maybe. I might have taken them for reasons other than money. The important thing is that I took them, and I won't tell you where they are."

He changed his line of attack.

He switched up his strategy.

"To-morrow I will have you arrested for theft."

"Tomorrow, I will have you arrested for theft."

"No," she demurred. "You have no proof—no witness. The papers will never be found unless I choose. Besides, you dare not have me arrested: you know this is not a police matter."

"No," she replied. "You have no proof—no witness. The documents will never be found unless I decide to show them. Besides, you wouldn't dare have me arrested; you know this isn’t something for the police."

"True," he admitted, for her knowledge made it useless to bluff. He paused and thought, Mizzi smiling maliciously from the armchair. The pendulum of victory was swinging to her and she could afford to smile. "Look here!" said Lionel, remembering another weapon. "Will you sell me them? I'll give you your price."

"You're right," he admitted, since her knowledge made it pointless to pretend. He paused and thought, Mizzi grinning slyly from the armchair. The pendulum of victory was swinging in her favor, and she was free to smile. "Listen up!" said Lionel, recalling another tactic. "Will you sell them to me? I'll pay whatever you ask."

"I will never sell them to you," she said, still with inflexible determination. "Do not suggest it again, please. It would be a waste of time."

"I will never sell them to you," she said, still with firm determination. "Please don’t suggest it again. It would be a waste of time."

Lionel was baffled, beaten at every point in the game, and he knew it. "Confound it!" he thought savagely, "I fancied I held the key of the situation in my hands, and I am no further on. I am deeper, in fact, for I know that Mizzi is here and I do not know why.... Ah!" he cried suddenly, determined to have one thing decided for good and all. "You have won to-night, I allow—I have no hold on you to make you confess—but there is one thing that you have done for me—one suspicion that your presence here has made almost a certainty—one resolution of a doubt that I can thank you for, however painfully—"

Lionel was confused, losing at every point in the game, and he realized it. "Dammit!" he thought angrily, "I thought I had the situation figured out, but I'm not any closer. In fact, I'm worse off because I know Mizzi is here, and I don't know why.... Ah!" he exclaimed suddenly, determined to settle one thing once and for all. "You've won tonight, I'll admit—I don't have anything to make you confess—but there is one thing you've done for me—one suspicion that your presence here has made nearly certain—one doubt that I can thank you for, no matter how painful it is—"

"And that is?" she asked with polite interest.

"And that is?" she asked with genuine curiosity.

"This. I have come to the conclusion that the whole business is a game. I don't understand it in the least, but it's a game none the less, and I have been a dupe. I am sure now that Miss Blair and Miss Arkwright are the same person. What do you say to that?"

"This. I've come to the conclusion that the whole thing is a game. I don't get it at all, but it's definitely a game, and I've been fooled. I'm sure now that Miss Blair and Miss Arkwright are the same person. What do you think about that?"

Mizzi did not so much as flicker an eyelash. She looked at him with a lazy amusement.

Mizzi didn’t even bat an eyelash. She looked at him with a relaxed amusement.

"Herr Gott!" she said with a scorn that seared his unbelief forever. "If you think that you will think anything. Miss Arkwright and Miss Blair the same!" and she went off into an uncontrollable peal.

"Oh my God!" she said with a contempt that burned his disbelief away for good. "If you think that you'll actually believe anything. Miss Arkwright and Miss Blair are just the same!" and she burst into an uncontrollable laugh.

Lionel would have dearly liked to shake her, but in the midst of his defeat he realized with a glow that she had won a Pyrrhic victory. "She won't tell me what I ask her," he thought deliriously, "but she has convinced me of Beatrice's innocence. That is something at all events!" and he, too, began to laugh so infectiously that Mizzi stared in amazement. They laughed like two good friends, and it was in an excellent humor that Lionel at last got up.

Lionel really wanted to shake her, but in the midst of his defeat, he realized with a spark that she had won a hollow victory. "She won't tell me what I want to know," he thought excitedly, "but she has convinced me of Beatrice's innocence. That's something, at least!" And he began to laugh so genuinely that Mizzi stared at him in surprise. They laughed like two good friends, and it was in a great mood that Lionel finally got up.

"Congratulations!" he said courteously. "You have beaten me, I confess. I can not give you in charge, unfortunately, and I do not see that any good purpose would be served by keeping you here all night. If I did, I would do so without hesitation. But I warn you that I shall ask Miss Arkwright to-morrow for an explanation of your presence."

"Congratulations!" he said politely. "You’ve beaten me, I admit. I can’t take you into custody, unfortunately, and I don’t think it would do any good to keep you here all night. If it would, I would do it without a second thought. But I need to warn you that I’ll be asking Miss Arkwright tomorrow for an explanation of why you’re here."

"I hope she will give you one," said Mizzi, rising with twinkling eyes. "Thank you, Mr. Mortimer. I hardly expected you to be generous, but I felt sure you would be sensible."

"I hope she gives you one," Mizzi said, getting up with sparkling eyes. "Thank you, Mr. Mortimer. I didn't really expect you to be generous, but I was sure you'd be sensible."

He laughed good-humoredly and walked over to the door, she following with a demure air that was something of a trial to Saint Anthony. He fitted the key, turned it, and opened the door with a little bow. The bow was never perfectly finished, for framed in the doorway he beheld the figures of his hostess and Mrs. Wetherby. They had evidently been on the point of knocking, for Miss Arkwright's right hand was raised in the air: the projected knock had assumed the similitude of a blessing—or a curse.

He laughed warmly and walked over to the door, she following with a shy demeanor that was somewhat of a challenge for Saint Anthony. He put the key in, turned it, and opened the door with a slight bow. The bow was never fully completed, as framed in the doorway he saw the figures of his hostess and Mrs. Wetherby. They had clearly been about to knock, for Miss Arkwright's right hand was raised in the air: the intended knock looked like either a blessing or a curse.

Mizzi fell back in unaffected horror. Lionel, the sport of fortune, was past surprise. He only stood and waited.

Mizzi fell back in genuine shock. Lionel, a product of fate, was beyond being surprised. He just stood there and waited.

"Mizzi!" said Miss Arkwright—one can not think of her as Winifred in such a deplorable situation: she radiated outraged respectability. "Mizzi!"

"Mizzi!" said Miss Arkwright—it's hard to see her as Winifred in such a terrible situation: she exuded outraged respectability. "Mizzi!"

The unhappy innocent was almost incapable of speech. Before Miss Arkwright's cutting dissyllables and Miss Wetherby's damnatory mien she was crushed. Lionel felt really sorry for her. "It is not my fault, madame," she mumbled. "Believe me, it is not my fault! This gentleman trepanned me. I am innocent. Is it not so, Mr. Mortimer?"

The sad innocent could barely speak. Faced with Miss Arkwright's sharp words and Miss Wetherby's glaring disapproval, she felt defeated. Lionel genuinely felt bad for her. "It's not my fault, ma'am," she stammered. "I promise, it's not my fault! This man tricked me. I'm innocent. Isn't that right, Mr. Mortimer?"

"She speaks the truth," said Lionel calmly. "I kidnaped her and locked her in. I suppose that sounds unlikely, but it is a fact: I alone am to blame. Does one apologize for this sort of thing? If so, I am very sorry, but——"

"She's telling the truth," Lionel said calmly. "I kidnapped her and locked her up. I know that sounds unbelievable, but it's a fact: I'm the only one to blame. Do you apologize for this kind of thing? If that's the case, I'm really sorry, but——"

Miss Arkwright silenced him with a gesture. Her looks were serpents, her attitude was a virgin horror of man. She pointed imperiously to the corridor. "Go!" she hissed (yes—yes: "hissed" is melodrama, but she did hiss), and Mizzi scuttled whimpering into the darkness. For a moment there was silence, but when the luckless girl had disappeared she turned again to Lionel. "Now, sir, be good enough to give me your key."

Miss Arkwright silenced him with a gesture. Her looks were like snakes, and her attitude radiated a deep fear of men. She pointed forcefully to the corridor. "Go!" she hissed (yes—yes: "hissed" is melodramatic, but she did hiss), and Mizzi quickly hurried into the darkness, whimpering. There was a moment of silence, but once the unfortunate girl had vanished, she turned back to Lionel. "Now, sir, please hand me your key."

"My key!" he repeated in amazement. "Why?"

"My key!" he echoed in surprise. "Why?"

"Because I mean to lock you in for the night," she said sternly. "Without that degrading precaution we can not feel safe."

"Because I plan to keep you in for the night," she said firmly. "Without that humiliating measure, we can't feel secure."

Mrs. Wetherby said nothing, but nodded a grim approval.

Mrs. Wetherby said nothing, but nodded in grim approval.

"I recognize your claims as hostess," replied Lionel amicably, "but, really, this is carrying the thing too far. I am not the vulgar intriguer you suppose—I merely kidnaped that charming——"

"I get your point as the hostess," Lionel responded kindly, "but honestly, this is taking it too far. I'm not the crass schemer you think I am—I just borrowed that lovely——"

"If you refuse," interrupted Winifred with basilisk eyes, "I shall ring for Forbes and have you turned out of the house at once. Do you understand?"

"If you refuse," Winifred cut in with a piercing look, "I'll call for Forbes and have you thrown out of the house immediately. Do you get that?"

Lionel sighed.

Lionel let out a sigh.

"I ought to have known," he said, "that a woman judges by emotion, not reason. In the morning perhaps I shall be able to convince you of my innocence." He gave her the key, which she snatched with unnecessary vehemence. "Good night. Thank you for an uneventful evening."

"I should have realized," he said, "that a woman decides based on emotion, not logic. In the morning, I might be able to prove my innocence to you." He handed her the key, which she took with excessive force. "Good night. Thanks for a quiet evening."

She ignored the insolence, which he justified to himself by her unreasonable suspicions. Leaving him in a nonchalant attitude, she swept out like an offended princess, her satellite following in an eloquent silence. Lionel heard the key turn dismally in the lock, and then the sound of footsteps retreating down the passage. He laughed gently to himself.

She brushed off the rudeness, which he excused because of her irrational doubts. Remaining indifferent, she stormed out like a hurt princess, her companion trailing behind in quiet solidarity. Lionel heard the key turn sadly in the lock, followed by the sound of footsteps fading away down the hallway. He chuckled softly to himself.

"Good lord, what a muddle!" he said, "and what an evening! First, the face at the window (what a title for a melodrama!—Dash it! I've seen it already on the posters!); second, the appearance of Mizzi; third, discovered by Winifred. Climax after climax, and I was beginning to think myself bored. Bored ... ye gods!... all I need at the present moment is bed: I've done enough thinking to scour my brain-pan for a year."

"Good grief, what a mess!" he said, "and what an evening! First, the face at the window (what a title for a drama!—Darn it! I've seen it already on the posters!); second, Mizzi shows up; third, I got caught by Winifred. One surprise after another, and I was starting to feel bored. Bored ... oh my god!... all I need right now is to sleep: I've done enough thinking to drain my brain for a year."

He undressed rapidly and got into bed. As he pulled the clothes about him he chuckled, remembering Winifred's face. Then he grew grave. "Sacked to-morrow, old boy!" he muttered. "Marching orders at breakfast and no mistake! But before I go I'll ask her straight out what little Mizzi is doing here." And then he turned over and was soon asleep.

He quickly took off his clothes and climbed into bed. As he wrapped himself in the sheets, he chuckled, thinking about Winifred's expression. Then he became serious. "Fired tomorrow, buddy!" he whispered. "I'll be getting the boot at breakfast, no doubt about it! But before I leave, I’ll ask her directly what little Mizzi is doing here." Then he turned over and fell asleep soon after.

But the horn of plenty still had some gifts to shower upon him: the god of mischances had not yet exhausted his store of thrills. About five minutes, as it seemed, after his retiring—it was really an hour and a half—Lionel was roused from a deep slumber by a knock. He sat up in bed, blinking heavily, wondering if his senses had deceived him, whether he was dreaming or awake. For a moment he sat listening, and then the knock was repeated, distinct beyond the possibility of mistake. "Confound it!" he muttered in an ill temper; "they might give me a night off now.... To-morrow I'll hang a placard on my door—'Conspiracies attended to from nine A. M. to eleven P. M. Kindly note hours of consultation.'—Hello!" he said aloud; "is anybody there?"

But the cornucopia still had some surprises for him: the god of misfortune hadn't run out of excitement yet. About five minutes after he went to bed—it was really an hour and a half—Lionel was jolted awake from a deep sleep by a knock. He sat up in bed, blinking heavily, questioning whether his senses were fooling him, whether he was dreaming or actually awake. For a moment, he listened, and then the knock came again, unmistakably clear. "Damn it!" he muttered in a bad mood; "they could give me a night off now... Tomorrow I’ll put up a sign on my door—'Conspiracies attended to from nine A.M. to eleven PM Please note consultation hours.'—Hello!" he called out; "is anyone there?"

The door opened a few inches, but no one entered. Lionel was too bored to speculate whether it might be Mizzi, Winifred or some unknown Oriental with turban and simitar. He was prepared to accept anything, if only he might be allowed to go to sleep. "Hello!" he repeated; "who is that?"

The door opened a bit, but no one came in. Lionel was too bored to wonder if it was Mizzi, Winifred, or some unknown person from the East wearing a turban and carrying a saber. He was ready to accept anything, just so he could go to sleep. "Hello!" he called out again; "who's there?"

"Me," said the voice of Miss Arkwright. "Are you asleep, Mr. Mortimer?"

"Me," said Miss Arkwright's voice. "Are you asleep, Mr. Mortimer?"

"Yes," said Lionel, grinning in the darkness—"sound asleep."

"Yeah," said Lionel, grinning in the dark—"totally asleep."

A species of cluck was heard from outside the door, but whether the strange sound indicated amusement or wrath he could not determine. He was wide awake now, determined to exact vengeance for his cavalier treatment.

A type of cluck echoed from outside the door, but he couldn't tell if the unusual sound signified laughter or anger. He was fully awake now, resolved to take revenge for his careless treatment.

"Some one," continued the voice, "is prowling round the house. A thief, I suppose. He seems to have a ladder."

"Someone," the voice went on, "is sneaking around the house. A thief, I guess. It looks like he has a ladder."

"Oh!" said Lionel, in the dispassionate tone of the village idiot. "Oh!"

"Oh!" said Lionel, in the indifferent tone of the village idiot. "Oh!"

Again there was silence, save for a repetition of the curious cluck. Presently Winifred said in a voice that trembled with indignation, "Is that all you have to say?"

Again there was silence, except for the odd cluck repeating. Soon, Winifred said in a voice that shook with anger, "Is that all you have to say?"

"You might give him my kind regards, and ask him to leave this room untouched," said Lionel, beginning to enjoy himself. He could picture Winifred biting her lip. "Good night, and pleasant dreams."

"You might send him my best wishes and ask him to keep this room as it is," Lionel said, starting to have a good time. He could imagine Winifred biting her lip. "Good night, and sweet dreams."

"You are a man, and my guest," said the voice bitterly, "and you leave us at the mercy of a possible murderer——"

"You are a man, and my guest," the voice said bitterly, "and you’re leaving us at the mercy of a potential murderer——"

"Not a guest," he corrected, "but a prisoner. If you require a man, why not ask Forbes? You were ready enough to use him just now."

"Not a guest," he said, "but a prisoner. If you need a man, why not ask Forbes? You seemed eager to use him just a moment ago."

Again there was silence. When she spoke again it was in the meekest of tones—so meek, indeed, that he scarcely recognized it as Winifred's.

Again there was silence. When she spoke again, it was in the softest of tones—so soft, in fact, that he barely recognized it as Winifred's.

"Mr. Mortimer, I am very sorry. Please be generous. I threatened you with a weapon I did not possess. Forbes sleeps in the village."

"Mr. Mortimer, I’m really sorry. Please be understanding. I threatened you with a weapon I didn’t have. Forbes is asleep in the village."

Lionel could not repress a laugh. He had been bluffed, but bore no malice. Enough of vengeance had been exacted. He could accept the capitulation without loss of dignity, for Miss Arkwright—most properly—had been obliged to ask his help.

Lionel couldn't hold back a laugh. He had been outsmarted, but he felt no bitterness. Enough revenge had been taken. He could accept the surrender without losing his dignity, since Miss Arkwright—rightly so—had been forced to ask for his help.

"A moment," he said, "and I shall be with you."

"A moment," he said, "and I'll be with you."

Jumping out of bed, he hastily put on his dressing-gown in the dark. Then he opened the door and joined Winifred in the corridor. She was in a dressing-gown, too, and looked charming en déshabille, her glorious hair unbound. But no time was allowed for more than a glance of admiration. Taking him by the arm, she hurried him along, explaining how she had not gone to sleep, but had lain thinking. "My light was out, of course," she said; "and this marauder, whoever he is, must have thought all the household asleep. I watched him cross the lawn and presently bring back a ladder from the potting-shed. He reared it against the window of an empty room. I at once came to you. As soon as he has discovered his mistake he will probably try another."

Jumping out of bed, he quickly threw on his robe in the dark. Then he opened the door and joined Winifred in the hallway. She was wearing a robe too and looked lovely in her disheveled state, her beautiful hair down. But there was no time for more than a quick admiring glance. Taking him by the arm, she rushed him along, explaining how she hadn't gone to sleep but had been lying awake thinking. "My light was out, of course," she said, "and this intruder, whoever he is, must have assumed everyone in the house was asleep. I saw him cross the lawn and then go back for a ladder from the potting shed. He leaned it against the window of an empty room. I immediately came to find you. As soon as he realizes his mistake, he'll probably try again."

"Then shall I go down-stairs and capture him as he descends?" suggested Lionel.

"Should I go downstairs and catch him as he comes down?" suggested Lionel.

"Let us see first from the window," she said. "We must make sure."

"Let’s take a look out the window first," she said. "We need to be sure."

They entered her bedroom together and walked softly toward the window. The blind was up.

They walked into her bedroom together and quietly made their way to the window. The blind was raised.

There was no moon, but the faint promise of the dawn lent a dim light, by which objects, grotesquely shadowed, could be distinguished. When they reached the window Lionel saw the top of a ladder resting against the sill.

There was no moon, but the faint hint of dawn provided a dim light, allowing objects, oddly shadowed, to be seen. When they got to the window, Lionel noticed the top of a ladder leaning against the sill.

"You're right!" he whispered. "Now, I'm off outside!" He turned to go, but was detained by a pressure on his arm.

"You're right!" he whispered. "Now, I'm heading outside!" He turned to leave, but was stopped by a grip on his arm.

"No, no!" whispered Winifred. "I can not let you—there may be a gang—you might get hurt——"

"No, no!" whispered Winifred. "I can't let you—there might be a gang—you could get hurt——"

"Nonsense!"

"Nonsense!"

"I insist!"

"I want this!"

"Then why——"

"Then why—"

"You must not go! Throw something instead——"

"You must not go! Throw something instead——"

"Absurd! I——"

"That's ridiculous! I——"

"I beg you!" she entreated, and her voice was so timid that once again Lionel's heart failed. "All right!" he said. "Give me something heavy. I'll fling up the window suddenly and surprise him!"

"I’m begging you!" she pleaded, and her voice was so soft that once again, Lionel's heart sank. "Okay!" he said. "Give me something heavy. I’ll throw open the window all of a sudden and catch him off guard!"

She pressed his arm gratefully and glided across the room. The next moment she was at his side, offering the water-jug.

She squeezed his arm in gratitude and moved smoothly across the room. In the next moment, she was by his side, holding out the water jug.

"Capital!" whispered Lionel. "Drench him first, then stun him with the jug. Any other trifles to bestow? Soap—hair-brushes—a boot or two? Any little knickknacks——"

"Capital!" whispered Lionel. "Soak him first, then knock him out with the jug. Any other little things to throw in? Soap—hairbrushes—a boot or two? Any small trinkets——"

"The ladder is moving!"

"The ladder's moving!"

It was being shifted a few inches, apparently to a better foothold. Lionel seized the jug and made ready for action.

It was being moved a few inches, apparently to find a better grip. Lionel grabbed the jug and prepared for action.

"Cigar or cocoa-nut, lidy?" he whispered joyously as he threw up the sash.

"Cigar or coconut, lady?" he whispered happily as he pushed up the window.


CHAPTER XXI

THE THORNY PATH

"Dinner as usual, sir?" said the landlord of The Happy Heart, looking into the parlor where Tony and Robert were playing piquet.

"Dinner as usual, sir?" the landlord of The Happy Heart asked, peeking into the parlor where Tony and Robert were playing piquet.

"Please, Mr. Glew," said Tony. "Seven o'clock as usual. Oh, by the way, have you got such a thing as a lantern?"

"Please, Mr. Glew," Tony said. "Seven o'clock as usual. Oh, by the way, do you have a lantern?"

"A lantern!" interjected Robert in surprise. "Why, what——" He was checked by a kick under the table.

"A lantern!" Robert exclaimed, surprised. "What——" He was interrupted by a kick under the table.

"I dare say I can find you one, sir," said the landlord. "We don't need 'em these summer nights, but I'll be bound there's one knocking about somewhere."

"I bet I can find you one, sir," said the landlord. "We don't need them on these summer nights, but I'm sure there's one hanging around somewhere."

"Thanks. My friend and I are enthusiastic collectors of butterflies and moths. We mean to try for some of the latter to-night; so, if we are not in till late, you won't be surprised or imagine burglars."

"Thanks. My friend and I are passionate collectors of butterflies and moths. We plan to go after some of the latter tonight, so if we're not back until late, you won't be surprised or think there are burglars."

"Bless you, no, sir!" said Glew, and went out to look for the lantern. As soon as the door closed Robert began to speak.

"Bless you, no, sir!" said Glew, and went out to find the lantern. As soon as the door shut, Robert started to talk.

"Don't think me censorious, Mr. Wild, if you please; but, really now, was there any need for that?"

"Please don’t think I’m being judgmental, Mr. Wild, but honestly, was that really necessary?"

"The lantern? Rather! We may have to——"

"The lantern? Of course! We might have to——"

"No—not the lantern. The—the perversion——"

"No—not the lantern. The—this perversion——"

"Oh! you mean the lie. Don't apologize, Bangs, old chap! you haven't offended me in the least. I like people to say what they think.—Well, the lie.... Yes, I think it was necessary. Conspirators can't stick at trifles. Besides, it's on my conscience, so there's no need for you to worry."

"Oh! you mean the lie. Don't apologize, Bangs, my friend! you haven't upset me at all. I appreciate it when people are honest about their thoughts.—Well, the lie.... Yes, I believe it was necessary. Conspirators can’t get caught up in small things. Besides, it’s on my conscience, so you don’t need to stress about it."

"But wouldn't an excuse——"

"But wouldn't a reason——"

"Have done equally well? Possibly, though I never save the ha'porth of tar. And an excuse would have been only a lie in another form—just as culpable. But don't let's worry over this: I want to tell you of the plan of campaign."

"Have we done just as well? Maybe, but I never save a penny's worth of tar. And an excuse would just be a lie in a different form—equally wrong. But let's not dwell on that: I want to tell you about the plan of action."

Robert subsided, content to have recorded a protest, however mild. He loved adventure; but, being a man trained in meticulous accuracy, he did not take kindly to deception—verbal deception, at any rate. The path of an adventurer he had found a trifle thorny, trodden by a man of conscience, but still he had enjoyed it and hoped to tread it still further. But he was careful to leave most of the talking to his comrade.

Robert quieted down, satisfied to have made his protest, even if it was just a mild one. He loved adventure, but being someone who valued precision, he wasn't fond of deception—especially not verbal deception. He found the adventurer's path a bit prickly, walked by someone with a conscience, but he still enjoyed it and hoped to continue on that journey. However, he made sure to let his companion do most of the talking.

"While you, Bangs," pursued Tony, leaning against the mantelpiece, "have been living the lotus life and acting slugabed, I have been working hard. Ever since I got a hint that Brown was in touch with The Quiet House I have been following him like the proverbial sleuth hound. I have discovered—at the expense of torn trousers and soaking feet—that he keeps tryst nightly with that charming bit of womanhood I spoke to once—and only once, alas! He has a private entry over the wall, having driven some large nails into the outer side, well off the beaten track. Up there the gay Lothario climbs—drops into the garden—meets his divinity, and voilà tout!"

"While you, Bangs," Tony said, leaning against the mantelpiece, "have been living the easy life and being lazy, I've been busting my butt. Ever since I got a tip that Brown was connected to The Quiet House, I've been following him like a bloodhound. I've found out—at the cost of ripped pants and wet feet—that he secretly meets up every night with that lovely woman I mentioned once—and only once, unfortunately! He has his own way in over the wall, having driven some big nails into the outside, far from the usual path. Up there, the charming guy climbs—drops into the garden—meets his goddess, and voilà tout!"

"What happens?" asked Robert eagerly.

"What’s going on?" asked Robert eagerly.

"The usual thing, Bangs. Exchange of kisses and confidences—which I, alas! can hear but imperfectly."

"The usual thing, Bangs. Swapping kisses and secrets—which I, unfortunately! can only hear somewhat clearly."

"But you don't listen!" exclaimed Robert, scandalized. Tony sighed.

"But you don't listen!" Robert shouted, shocked. Tony sighed.

"I have to steel myself. In high politics, you know ... but, of course, I shall never tell."

"I have to prepare myself. In high politics, you know ... but, of course, I will never share."

"Oh!"

"Oh!"

The disappointment was obvious, and Tony laughed.

The disappointment was clear, and Tony laughed.

"No, old fellow, love's young dream and so forth must be respected. Honestly, I've only watched, hoping to get a clew—perhaps some conversation with the girl when Brown goes home. No good! No earthly good! Brown sees her safe to the house and then comes back. He stands on a convenient garden roller and climbs. Then he drops, and off home. Ditto me, disgusted, envious, lacking information. To-night I mean to move."

"No, my friend, we have to respect the idea of young love and all that. Honestly, I've just been watching, hoping to pick up some clues—maybe have a chat with the girl when Brown goes home. No luck! Absolutely no luck! Brown walks her safely to her house and then comes back. He stands on a handy garden roller and climbs up. Then he drops down and heads home. Same for me, feeling frustrated, envious, and clueless. Tonight, I plan to make a move."

"Yes!"

"Absolutely!"

"We'll lie in wait, Bangs, and have a word with them. A coil of rope and a sack—those shall be our only tools. While Brown is talking we'll try to slip the sack over his head and tie him up. I don't think the lady will scream, for it seems to me that there's a kind of counterplot afoot—either against Billy, the Turkish government, or Miss Arkwright. (I still feel sure she is not Miss Arkwright, but a maid of sorts.) Now, if I'm right in my conjectures she won't be keen on advertising Brown's presence to her mistress. If I'm wrong and she does scream and help comes, we must bolt to the wall and clear out at once. If we succeed, we'll have a talk with her and try to find out something. I'm tired of waiting in the dark. Now, are you game to help?"

"We'll wait for them, Bangs, and have a chat. A coil of rope and a bag—those will be our only tools. While Brown is talking, we’ll try to slip the bag over his head and tie him up. I don't think the lady will scream, because it seems like there’s some kind of counterplot going on—either against Billy, the Turkish government, or Miss Arkwright. (I still believe she’s not really Miss Arkwright, but more of a maid.) Now, if I'm right about this, she won’t want to let her boss know Brown is around. If I’m wrong and she does scream and help shows up, we need to run for the wall and get out fast. If we succeed, we’ll have a chat with her and see what we can find out. I’m tired of waiting in the dark. So, are you in to help?"

Robert wagged his head nervously.

Robert nervously shook his head.

"Of course, Mr. Wild, I'm as ready for adventure as I ever was. But—but this is a serious business. It—it might mean prison!"

"Of course, Mr. Wild, I'm as ready for adventure as I ever was. But—but this is serious. It—it could mean prison!"

"It might," agreed Tony; "but I don't think it need if we're smart. Anyhow, we must be prepared to risk a little for a great adventure. If we're cute about the sack business I think I can manage the roping part all right. You would have to hold the lady."

"It might," Tony agreed, "but I don't think it needs to if we're clever. Anyway, we have to be ready to take some risks for a great adventure. If we're smart about the sack situation, I think I can handle the roping part just fine. You would need to hold the lady."

"B-but——"

"B-but—"

"She's awfully pretty ..."

"She's really pretty ..."

"That is no inducement, Mr. Wild. You forget——"

"That’s not an incentive, Mr. Wild. You’re forgetting——"

"Come, Bangs, none of your 'perversions!' I don't forget anything. How many chaps half your age would jump at the chance of capturing a beautiful anarchist!"

"Come on, Bangs, cut out the 'perversions!' I remember everything. How many guys half your age would leap at the opportunity to snag a beautiful anarchist?"

"I am not an old man yet, Mr. Wild," said Robert with some heat. "You misunderstand me. I love romance and can take an interest—a detached interest, of course—an appreciative and artistic interest in a pretty woman. What I am thinking of is the law. But, since you put it like that, I will come and risk it."

"I’m not an old man yet, Mr. Wild," Robert said with some intensity. "You’re misunderstanding me. I love romance and can have an interest—a detached interest, of course—an appreciative and artistic interest in a beautiful woman. What I’m really thinking about is the law. But since you put it that way, I’ll come and take the risk."

"Good," said Tony, concealing a smile. "Don't let your interest be too detached, old boy, or she may get away into the house. Grip her firmly by the wrists."

"Good," Tony said, hiding a smile. "Don't be too aloof, buddy, or she might slip into the house. Hold her tightly by the wrists."

They spent the rest of the summer evening in maturing their plans and piquet. Having given his word Mr. Hedderwick scorned to withdraw, though it was plain that he did not relish the prospect of a night attack. Tony, in addition to the lantern, procured some rope and a sack from the landlord. "To put the moths in, Mr. Glew," he said brightly by way of explanation.

They spent the rest of the summer evening going over their plans and playing piquet. Once he committed, Mr. Hedderwick refused to back down, even though it was clear he wasn’t excited about the idea of a night attack. Tony, along with the lantern, got some rope and a sack from the landlord. "To put the moths in, Mr. Glew," he said cheerfully to explain.

"To put the morths in!" repeated Glew in a dazed fashion. "To put the MORTHS in! TO PUT THE——"

"To put the morths in!" Glew repeated, sounding bewildered. "To put the MORTHS in! TO PUT THE——"

He was still repeating the formula when the adventurous pair set out.

He was still going over the formula when the adventurous pair set off.

It was a quarter past ten, thirty minutes before the odd-job man was wont to meet the lady of his heart. They reached The Quiet House in some ten minutes, and then skirted the wall for a short distance, till Tony stopped with a whispered "Here we are!" It was in a bridle-path that they found themselves, about eighty yards from the main road that ran through Shereling. Tony crouched down behind a convenient clump of bramble and lighted the lamp.

It was 10:15, half an hour before the handyman was supposed to meet the woman he loved. They arrived at The Quiet House in about ten minutes, then walked along the wall for a short distance until Tony stopped and whispered, "Here we are!" They found themselves on a bridle path, about eighty yards from the main road that went through Shereling. Tony crouched down behind a handy patch of brambles and lit the lamp.

"I'll light you up the wall," he said softly. "When you get to the top, hang by your hands and drop quietly down. There's soft grass ten feet beneath you. As soon as you're up I shall put out the light, for I know the way by heart now."

"I'll light up the wall for you," he said quietly. "When you reach the top, hang by your hands and drop down gently. There's soft grass ten feet below you. As soon as you're up, I’ll turn off the light, because I know the way by heart now."

With a resentful obedience Robert observed the big nails that had been driven into the brickwork by the amorous Brown. Heartily wishing himself at home—or at least in the snug security of The Happy Heart—but loath to plead his years or cowardice, Mr. Hedderwick put his foot on the lowest spike, grasped one above his head, and began the ascent. To an active boy it would have been a trivial feat; to an elderly adventurer it was full of pain, and in spite of an heroic spirit he was more than once on the point of climbing down again. Something, however, forbade the refusal of the adventure: curiosity or shame held him to his word. The glimmer of Tony's lantern following—nay, leading him ever upward, shone like a beacon of promise in the dark. The thought spurred him, and it was not until he had one leg across the top of the wall that he reflected on a change of simile: the light might rather be a will-o'-the-wisp luring him to destruction or disgrace. For a moment his courage failed.

With a resentful obedience, Robert watched the large nails that had been hammered into the brickwork by the infatuated Brown. He wished he were home—or at least in the cozy safety of The Happy Heart—but reluctant to admit his age or cowardice, Mr. Hedderwick stepped onto the lowest spike, grabbed one above his head, and started climbing. For an active boy, it would have been a simple task; for an older adventurer, it was quite painful, and despite his brave spirit, he nearly turned back more than once. Something, however, prevented him from backing out: curiosity or embarrassment kept him committed to the challenge. The glow of Tony's lantern, following—and actually leading him upward—shone like a beacon of hope in the darkness. This thought motivated him, and it wasn't until he had one leg over the wall that he reconsidered his analogy: the light could be more like a will-o'-the-wisp, luring him to doom or disgrace. For a moment, his courage wavered.

"Mr. Wild!" he whispered despairingly, "I'm——"

"Mr. Wild!" he whispered in despair, "I’m——"

The light went out.

The light turned off.

"All right?" said the cheering voice of his fellow criminal. "Good. I'm coming."

"All set?" said the encouraging voice of his partner in crime. "Great. I'm on my way."

He began to follow, rope, sack and lantern coiled over his shoulders. With a groan of resolution Robert wiped the sweat of fear from his forehead and dropped lightly to the ground.

He started to follow, with rope, sack, and lantern slung over his shoulders. With a determined sigh, Robert wiped the sweat of fear from his forehead and jumped down lightly to the ground.

Tony joined him a moment later, breathing a little quickly from the climb. Without a word he walked cautiously forward, Robert close behind, until they reached a thicket of elder-bushes. Into the heart of this they crept, making as little noise as possible. Presently, when Tony judged they were so placed as to be secure from observation, themselves able to observe, they halted. "May as well sit down," whispered Tony; "quite likely we shall have to wait a bit." He spread the sack upon the ground and the two of them established themselves upon it, clasping their knees.

Tony caught up with him a moment later, breathing a bit heavily from the climb. Without saying a word, he walked carefully ahead, with Robert right behind him, until they reached a cluster of elder bushes. They quietly crept into the center of it, trying to make as little noise as possible. Soon, when Tony felt they were positioned securely enough to avoid being seen while still able to observe, they stopped. "We might as well sit down," Tony whispered; "it's likely we’ll have to wait awhile." He laid the sack on the ground, and they both settled onto it, holding their knees.

The night, most luckily, was fine. There was no hint of rain, and little dew was falling. There was no moon, and the fitful starlight only served to display the immensity of the darkness, the monstrous tree-shapes looming threateningly on them, the overwhelming horror of The Quiet House. Black against the dark background of the sky it reared its bulk above them, seeming to menace the guilty pair with nightmare terrors, starting ghoulish fancies, prosaic fears of the police, a child's dread of the dark and all its goblins. It was so silent, powerful, unknown. Mr. Hedderwick's flesh crept with a chill that was not climatic, and instinctively he huddled closer to his companion.

The night, thankfully, was clear. There was no sign of rain, and very little dew was falling. There was no moon, and the flickering starlight only showed how vast the darkness was, with giant tree shapes looming threateningly around them, highlighting the overwhelming fear of The Quiet House. Dark against the deep sky, it towered over them, seeming to threaten the guilty couple with nightmarish horrors, sparking creepy thoughts, ordinary fears of the police, and a child’s fear of the dark and its monsters. It was so quiet, powerful, and unknown. Mr. Hedderwick felt a chill that wasn’t due to the weather, and he instinctively huddled closer to his companion.

"Can we smoke?" he breathed.

"Can we smoke?" he whispered.

"No. They might see the glow."

"No. They might notice the glow."

"They," of course meant Brown and his accomplice; but, uttered beneath that lowering sky, those gloomy trees, in the atmosphere of intrigue and hypothetical bloodshed, the words assumed an awful import to Mr. Hedderwick. Romance cut with a keener edge across his quivering soul. He was getting his fill of adventures, and with an unfeigned zeal he now wished himself safe at Bloomsbury, even at the price of a Caudle's welcome. To think that he, a middle-aged—no! an old man, with a good wife—yes! a good wife, though sometimes a little overbearing—a churchwarden of Saint Frideswide's and all the rest—to think that he could be so harebrained and ungrateful as to embark on such an enterprise! It was incredible: he must be dreaming.... No; it was real. His right foot was in agony: it had gone to sleep.

"They," of course, referred to Brown and his accomplice; but, spoken under that dark sky, those gloomy trees, in an atmosphere of intrigue and possible violence, the words took on a terrifying meaning for Mr. Hedderwick. The sense of adventure cut sharply through his anxious thoughts. He was getting more than enough excitement, and with genuine enthusiasm, he now wished he were safe back in Bloomsbury, even if it meant facing Caudle's welcome. To think that he, a middle-aged—no! an old man, with a good wife—yes! a good wife, even if she was sometimes a bit overbearing—a churchwarden of Saint Frideswide's and everything that came with it—to think that he could be so reckless and ungrateful as to take on such a venture! It was unbelievable: he must be dreaming... No; it was real. His right foot was in agony: it had gone numb.

"Ouch!" he said, stretching it. "What's the time, Mr. Wild?"

"Ouch!" he exclaimed, stretching it. "What time is it, Mr. Wild?"

"Can't see. Daren't light a match. 'Fraid they're late. Shut up."

"Can't see. Don't want to light a match. Afraid they're late. Be quiet."

Time passed heavily to the unhappy man. A schoolboy, condemned to a caning, can face the prospect with a decent front if only the punishment is not deferred. "Cane me, if you must!" he would say, "but get it over and let's have done with it!" A fair request, provided the culprit be not a hardened nature whom it is policy to keep in suspense. In such a case the Third Degree may be justified. But suppose your culprit to be a sensitive shrinking nature, to whom the waiting is worse torture than the actual pain itself, is it not a refinement of cruelty to keep him on the tenter-hooks? Robert Hedderwick was of such, a gentle, kindly, romantic, imaginative fool. You who scorn his folly might pardon, could you but enter into half his feelings as he waits amid the elder-bushes.

Time dragged for the unhappy man. A schoolboy facing a beating can handle it with a brave face as long as the punishment isn’t postponed. "Go ahead and hit me if you have to!" he might say, "But just get it over with so we can move on!" That’s a reasonable request, unless the offender is someone who's tough enough that it’s better to keep them in suspense. In that case, you might justify using the Third Degree. But what if the offender is a sensitive person, for whom the waiting is worse than the actual punishment? Isn’t it a cruel twist to keep him on edge? Robert Hedderwick was that kind of person—a gentle, kind-hearted, romantic, imaginative fool. You who look down on his foolishness might reconsider if you could just understand even a fraction of his feelings as he waits in the elder bushes.

At eleven o'clock there was promise of incident to cheer their hearts. From the other side of the house they heard a voice call sharply, "Who is there?" No answer was returned, but before the echoes died they saw a dark figure run silently across the lawn and clamber up the wall where they had made an entrance. Breathlessly they watched, and in another moment a second figure, carrying some lethal weapon, walked sharply into the field of vision. The newcomer made a tour of the house and part of the garden, but did not disturb the anxious watchers in the elders. As soon as he had disappeared Robert whispered, "What now? Shall we go after the man who climbed?"

At eleven o'clock, there was a promise of something to lift their spirits. From the other side of the house, they heard a voice call out sharply, "Who’s there?" No one answered, but before the echoes faded, they saw a dark figure quickly dash across the lawn and climb up the wall where they had created an entrance. They watched, breathless, and in a moment, a second figure, armed with some kind of weapon, stepped into view. The newcomer circled the house and part of the garden but didn’t disturb the nervous watchers in the bushes. As soon as he was gone, Robert whispered, "What now? Should we go after the guy who climbed?"

"No," replied Tony, whispering too. "I don't understand this. It's a different program. Looks as if something is up. Better wait."

"No," Tony whispered back. "I don't get this. It's a different program. Feels like something's going on. We should wait."

His companion sighed, for he had hoped release was at hand. Instead, he resigned himself to waiting.

His companion sighed, as he had hoped freedom was close. Instead, he accepted that he had to wait.

An hour crept by with feet of lead. To the amateur plotters it seemed as if time itself were standing still. Robert thought it must be two o'clock at least, but Tony's common sense guessed it to be near midnight. Once the churchwarden ventured to suggest that honor was satisfied, curiosity likely to be disappointed; why not retire? Tony refused doggedly:

An hour dragged on like it was made of lead. For the amateur planners, it felt like time had completely stalled. Robert thought it had to be at least two o'clock, but Tony’s practical sense estimated it was closer to midnight. At one point, the churchwarden suggested that their honor had been satisfied and they were probably just going to be disappointed by their curiosity; why not just leave? Tony stubbornly refused:

"I'm going to see it through now if we wait till five o'clock. No more lost chances!"

"I'm going to stick with it now if we wait until five o'clock. No more missed opportunities!"

Robert groaned and rubbed his leg.

Robert groaned and rubbed his leg.

It was half past one when Robert, half asleep, conscious of nothing but discomfort, felt Tony plucking at his sleeve. He roused himself irritably, almost forgetful of their errand. Then, in the dim foreshadowing of dawn, he saw the outline of a man on the top of the wall. He awoke fully on the instant, clutching his fellow sufferer in pure fright, staring with wide-open eyes. The man dropped nimbly down upon the grass and walked noiselessly across the lawn.

It was 1:30 when Robert, half asleep and barely aware of anything but discomfort, felt Tony tugging at his sleeve. He woke up irritably, nearly forgetting their mission. Then, in the dim light of dawn, he saw the outline of a man on top of the wall. He instantly woke up fully, gripping his companion in pure fear, staring wide-eyed. The man jumped down onto the grass and walked quietly across the lawn.

They watched him eagerly, feeling that their sufferings were about to be rewarded, wondering whether they ought to follow or wait. If the first, they might be discovered; the second, they might lose him. For once in his life Tony was at a loss. He had reckoned on Brown's arrival, but not at a different hour, pursuing a new course. What was the best plan?

They watched him eagerly, feeling like their struggles were about to pay off, unsure if they should follow or wait. If they followed, they might get caught; if they waited, they might lose him. For once in his life, Tony was confused. He had expected Brown to arrive, but not at a different time and not taking a new path. What was the best move?

Fortunately the period of suspense was short. The figure, which had disappeared for a moment round the corner of the house, came into view once more. It still moved with surpassing stealth, but now it was carrying a long unwieldy object in one hand. It was a ladder. Tony nearly whistled when he saw this ominous contrivance, and Robert quivered with a satisfying impatience for the coming drama. Were they to see a new version of Romeo and Juliet, or was it merely a vulgar burglary?

Fortunately, the wait didn’t last long. The figure, which had briefly vanished around the corner of the house, came back into sight. It still moved with incredible stealth, but now it was holding a long, awkward object in one hand. It was a ladder. Tony almost whistled when he spotted this ominous tool, and Robert buzzed with an eager impatience for the upcoming drama. Were they about to witness a new take on Romeo and Juliet, or was it just a cheap burglary?

The man paused, surveyed the blank unlighted house, and then reared his ladder against a window. He climbed rapidly up, but after a brief inspection descended with equal swiftness. He raised the ladder with no obvious effort, carried it some little distance along, and placed it at another window. It was clear that he was correcting a mistake.

The man paused, looked at the dark, unlit house, and then leaned his ladder against a window. He quickly climbed up, but after a quick look, he came back down just as fast. He lifted the ladder with ease, moved it a short distance, and positioned it at another window. It was obvious he was fixing a mistake.

"What"—began Robert in a thick whisper, but Tony clapped a hand on his mouth, fearing lest the faintest sound might betray them. Not that there was any real danger, for the night-prowler was twenty yards away, the wind had begun to rise, and the tree branches were sighing loudly enough to drown a human murmur. But Tony meant to run no risks: he was determined to see the play through to the end. Not the quiver of an eyelash must betray them. At all costs, silence.

"What"—Robert started in a low whisper, but Tony quickly covered his mouth, worried that even the slightest noise might give them away. There wasn't really any danger, since the night-walker was twenty yards off, the wind had picked up, and the tree branches were rustling loudly enough to mask a human whisper. But Tony wasn't taking any chances: he was resolved to see the situation through to the end. Not even the flutter of an eyelash could give them away. Silence at all costs.

They saw Brown—for who else could it be?—rear the ladder, then shift it a little to get a better foundation. He tried it with his hand to make sure that it was firm. At last, satisfied and resolute, he placed one foot upon it and began to climb. The watchers held their breath, unconscious of the drama within a drama about to burst upon them. Robert was trembling, his mouth still covered by Tony's precautionary hand. Brown was on the second rung, when the window above was suddenly flung open. The mysterious Billy leaned out, jug in hand. "Good evening!" he said distinctly, in pleasant gentlemanly accents that reached the watchers in the elders: "good evening. Have a drink?"

They saw Brown—who else could it be?—set up the ladder, then adjust it slightly to get a better grip. He tested it with his hand to ensure it was steady. Finally, feeling confident and determined, he placed one foot on it and started to climb. The onlookers held their breath, unaware of the hidden drama about to unfold. Robert was shaking, his mouth still covered by Tony's cautious hand. Brown was on the second rung when the window above suddenly swung open. The enigmatic Billy leaned out, jug in hand. "Good evening!" he said clearly, in a pleasant, gentlemanly tone that reached the watchers below: "good evening. Wanna drink?"

The wretched Brown was so bouleversé by the unexpected apparition that he stood fast, gaping wonderfully, upon the second rung. It was lucky that he had climbed no higher, for the cascade that fell with unerring aim fairly upon his countenance was the best part of a gallon of water. Apart from the hydraulic force exerted the wanton suddenness of the attack must have dashed him to the ground. He fell prone upon the grass, striving to disburden himself of an unwanted draft, pitiable, a spluttering ruin of a conspirator.

The poor Brown was so shocked by the unexpected appearance that he froze, staring in disbelief from the second rung. It was fortunate he hadn’t climbed any higher, because the torrent that came down directly onto his face was nearly a gallon of water. Besides the powerful force of the water, the suddenness of the surprise must have knocked him off his feet. He fell flat on the grass, trying to get rid of the unwanted drenching, a pitiable, spluttering mess of a conspirator.

"Glwhtt!" said Robert from behind the hand of Tony. He was nigh to bursting with suppressed emotion. "Glwhtt! oh! glwhtt!"

"Glwhtt!" Robert said from behind Tony's hand. He was almost bursting with suppressed emotion. "Glwhtt! oh! glwhtt!"

Tony, too, found it hard to keep himself in hand. Despite his disappointment at beholding his fair hopes frustrated, it was no easy task to check the laugh. To see a man, bold, confident, assured of success, in one moment converted into a sodden and convulsive mass, weltering upon the lawn—it was catastrophic. If incongruity be the basis of the comic spirit, it was here with a vengeance.

Tony also struggled to control himself. Even though he was disappointed that his bright hopes were dashed, holding back his laughter was no easy feat. Watching a man, who was bold, confident, and sure of success, suddenly turn into a clumsy, shaking mess, writhing on the lawn—it was devastating. If the essence of humor lies in the absurd, it was certainly present here in abundance.

"With a vengeance." The thought was impelled by the quick hurry of events. Brown, after gaspy flounderings for half a minute, recovered himself and stood erect. He shook an Olympian fist in powerless wrath toward the window, breathed a crimson oath that might have scorched the stars, and ran blunderingly toward the wall. He made for his point of entry by a straight path and dashed blindly through the elders. In his headlong course he trod convincingly on Robert's fingers, but sped on, heedless of the yelp of pain. "Ahoo!" whooped Mr. Hedderwick, leaping in his agony, unrecking of the consequences. "Ahoo! Ahoo!" He was wringing his hands in an ecstasy of anguish as Lionel came bursting from the house, a heavy walking-stick in his hand.

"With a vengeance." The thought was triggered by the rapid pace of events. Brown, after gasping and struggling for half a minute, steadied himself and stood tall. He shook an angry fist at the window, shouted a curse that could've burned the stars, and ran awkwardly toward the wall. He headed straight for his point of entry and rushed blindly through the bushes. In his reckless dash, he stepped hard on Robert's fingers but kept going, ignoring the yelp of pain. "Ahoo!" yelled Mr. Hedderwick, jumping in agony, unaware of the consequences. "Ahoo! Ahoo!" He was wringing his hands in a fit of distress as Lionel burst out of the house, a heavy walking stick in hand.

"The wall quick!" said Tony, seizing him by the arm. They had a start of thirty yards: Brown was over the wall and out of sight by this time, and there was still hope of escape. Had Tony been alone he would have got away, for they reached the wall well ahead of the frantic Lionel, aflame for blood. But chivalry forced him to let Robert climb first. "Up you go!" he said, thrusting the adventurous churchwarden upon the roller. There were no spikes to help or hinder on the inner wall. Robert caught hold of the top bricks and scrabbled piteously with his toes, searching for a foothold. Tony shoved fiercely from beneath, the thought of prison or the bowstring beating in his brain. With a heave of which he scarce thought himself capable he boosted Robert high in the air. Mr. Hedderwick flew up like a ball of india-rubber, rolled on to the top, and fell over the other side with a wail of apprehension. Luckily the mud was soft. But just as he touched the mud, Lionel came up with his quarry and seized him by the collar. Tony turned and struggled like a wildcat, but he was no match for the other. Lionel shortened his stick and drove it upward. With a grunt of pain Tony collapsed. "Whew!" said Lionel, vastly pleased as he contemplated the fallen foe. "There's one of 'em, anyhow. I hope I haven't killed the brute."

"The wall, quick!" Tony said, grabbing him by the arm. They had a thirty-yard head start: Brown was already over the wall and out of sight, and there was still hope of escape. If Tony had been alone, he would have made it, since they reached the wall well ahead of the frantic Lionel, who was furious. But chivalry made him let Robert go up first. "Up you go!" he said, pushing the daring churchwarden onto the roller. There were no spikes to help or hinder on the inner wall. Robert grabbed onto the top bricks and desperately searched for a foothold with his toes. Tony shoved hard from below, the threat of prison or the gallows racing through his mind. With a surge of strength he didn’t know he had, he boosted Robert high into the air. Mr. Hedderwick flew up like a rubber ball, rolled onto the top, and fell over the other side with a cry of dread. Luckily, the mud was soft. But just as he hit the mud, Lionel caught up and grabbed him by the collar. Tony turned and fought like a wildcat, but he was no match for Lionel. Lionel shortened his stick and swung it upward. With a grunt of pain, Tony fell to the ground. "Whew!" Lionel said, very pleased as he looked at his fallen opponent. "That's one of them, at least. I hope I haven't killed the guy."


CHAPTER XXII

A TELEGRAM AND SUNDRIES

The twelve-year-old son of Mr. Glew, who, in the intervals of school and expiating the inevitable offenses of youth, was utilized to carry telegrams, came whistling up the drive of The Quiet House. He rang the bell, and in the fulness of time the summons was answered by a man servant who had been engaged the day before. He was called Jones. "Hello! young cock-sparrow!" said Jones cheerfully. "Brought a wire? Who's it for? Her Imperial Highness or me?"

The twelve-year-old son of Mr. Glew, who spent his free time carrying telegrams while dealing with the usual mischief of youth, came whistling up the driveway of The Quiet House. He rang the bell, and eventually, a male servant who had been hired the day before answered. His name was Jones. "Hey there, little guy!" said Jones cheerfully. "Got a message? Is it for Her Imperial Highness or for me?"

"Name o' Mortimer," said the youthful Glew. "Catch hold!"

"Hey, Mortimer," said the young Glew. "Grab on!"

"Mortimer's on the lawn, sunning himself," said Jones. "Better take it straight round."

"Mortimer's outside on the lawn, soaking up the sun," said Jones. "You should take it right over."

"I'm employed to hand telegrams into the house," said the boy with all the dignity of a government servant. "It's your business to see ole Mortimer gets it."

"I'm hired to deliver telegrams to the house," said the boy with all the dignity of a government employee. "It's your job to make sure old Mortimer gets it."

"And it's my business to give a clip 'side o' the 'ed," said Jones, riposting. "So if you don't want a thick ear inside of a jiffy, my lad, off you go."

"And it’s my job to give a smack to the side of your head," said Jones, retorting. "So if you don't want a black eye in a moment, kid, get lost."

Master Glew obeyed, soothing his outraged independence by a cry of "Yar! red-nosed beef-eater!" as soon as he was out of reach. Jones, regretting the ungiven clip, banged the door, and the libel-loving Glew went pleasantly on his way.

Master Glew complied, calming his bruised pride with a shout of "Yar! red-nosed beef-eater!" as soon as he was out of reach. Jones, feeling bad about the missed opportunity, slammed the door, and the gossip-loving Glew happily continued on his way.

He found Lionel in the summer-house and delivered the yellow envelope, waiting dutifully to see if there was a prepaid reply, hoping for a possible douceur. In this he was disappointed; for although the telegram seemed to give unbounded pleasure to the recipient, no money changed hands, and Master Glew retired, embittered and pessimistic. As soon as he was alone Lionel read and read again the flimsy slip that conveyed so much. The words danced before him in the sunlight:

He found Lionel in the summer house and handed over the yellow envelope, waiting patiently to see if there was a prepaid reply, hoping for a possible tip. He was let down; even though the telegram brought immense joy to the recipient, no cash was exchanged, and Master Glew left, feeling bitter and pessimistic. Once he was alone, Lionel reread the thin slip that meant so much. The words danced in front of him in the sunlight:

"Lukos has died of measles. Stay where you are and keep watching. Beatrice."

"Lukos has died from measles. Stay where you are and keep watching. Beatrice."

Lukos dead! Then the path was clear, and he was free to hope, free to pursue, to strive with all his heart and soul to ... to do what? Why, make love to her, of course, and presently ask her to marry him. "Marry" ... The word came on him with a stunning shock, as it does to every free bachelor when he sees the wedding-ring as a reality within his grasp. However much we long to persuade the beloved object to the vow—however much we have striven, hoped, schemed and waited—still, when the time comes of a verity, and at last we can confidently say, "I am to be married to-morrow!" or next week, or a year hence—then, in the midst of our ecstasy, there comes a whisper, "Married! Tied! Shackled!" We welcome our chains, of course,—we would barter our souls for the lovely fetters; but there always comes, if but for the briefest of seconds, the appalling thought, "Freedom has gone forever!" Is there a single husband who, during the period of courtship, has never been "afraid with any amazement"?

Lukos is dead! Now the path is clear, and he is free to hope, free to pursue, to strive with all his heart and soul to ... to do what? Of course, to make love to her and then ask her to marry him. "Marry" ... The word hit him like a shock, just like it does to every single guy when he realizes that a wedding ring is a real possibility within reach. No matter how much we want to convince the one we love to make that vow—no matter how hard we've tried, hoped, planned, and waited—still, when the moment finally arrives, and we can confidently say, "I'm getting married tomorrow!" or next week, or a year from now—then, in the midst of our excitement, there's a whisper, "Married! Tied! Shackled!" We embrace our chains, of course—we would trade our souls for those beautiful bonds; but there always comes, even if just for the briefest second, the disturbing thought, "Freedom is gone forever!" Is there a single husband who, during the dating period, has never felt "afraid with any amazement"?

The thought, the fear, came to Lionel as to the rest of us, and for an instant he felt like taking to his heels. Then he smiled as a grown-up upon a child, naturally timid and ignorant. Next, his face fell, as he harped back to his theme. He was to "make love" to her.

The thought, the fear, hit Lionel like it did the rest of us, and for a moment he felt like running away. Then he smiled at her like an adult does to a child who is naturally shy and clueless. After that, his expression changed as he returned to his focus. He was supposed to "make love" to her.

To a man of his stamp making love is not a difficult matter. To a man like Tony it is a second nature—the breath of life—a perennial pastime. But making love is not the same as loving, and to make love to Beatrice would be an insult. He admired Beatrice so much—respected her—was anxious to serve her, to obey her slightest whim,—thought her the best and most desirable creature he had ever known. But if he did not love her, it would be a base thing to pretend, to use her as a toy. Did he love her or not? He wanted her—oh, yes! he wanted her as he had never wanted any one else in his life. There had been others, of course, with whom he had dallied—for instance, Mizzi. There had been one or two in whom he had taken a more serious interest, like Miss Arkwright. With the latter he had more than once imagined himself to be in love—he had dwelt delightfully upon the possibility—had gone to bed reflecting, "Dash it! Beatrice has forgotten me. Winifred's a darling! Why not?" And then when the kiss had been offered, he had refused. Well, in that lay hope of a greater certainty. He had refused the kiss—had he not?—because of Beatrice. Therefore he loved her. Therefore he must make love to her. Therefore he must ask her to marry him. Marriage! Whew—w—w!

For a guy like him, making love isn't hard at all. For someone like Tony, it's second nature—the essence of life—a never-ending hobby. But making love isn't the same as loving, and to make love to Beatrice would be disrespectful. He admired Beatrice deeply—respected her—was eager to serve her, to fulfill her every whim—thought she was the best and most desirable person he had ever met. However, if he didn't truly love her, it would be disgraceful to pretend and treat her like a plaything. Did he love her or not? He desired her—oh, yes! He wanted her like he had never wanted anyone before. There were others, of course, he'd flirted with—like Mizzi. There were one or two he had been more seriously interested in, like Miss Arkwright. With her, he'd often pictured himself in love—he'd happily considered the possibility—lying in bed thinking, "Darn it! Beatrice has forgotten me. Winifred's amazing! Why not?" And then when the kiss was offered, he had turned it down. Well, in that lay the hope for something greater. He had turned down the kiss—hadn't he?—because of Beatrice. So, he must love her. Therefore, he must make love to her. Therefore, he must ask her to marry him. Marriage! Whew—w—w!

"Oh, you vacillating ass!" he groaned to himself, getting up and stretching his arms as if to free himself from the enmeshing subtleties. "Why can't you be content to believe yourself in love and go straight ahead now that the path is clear? Why can't you be an ordinary, sane, matter-of-fact lover, and ask the dear woman if she'll marry you and help you to help her, the world and yourself? Yourself, who need it badly. Why—why—why can't you be reasonable?" He shook his fist savagely at the heavens. "Why worry your brain about these intricate analyses? Why? Because, my boy, she deserves certainly, and, by George, she shall have it!"

"Oh, you indecisive idiot!" he groaned to himself, getting up and stretching his arms as if trying to free himself from the tangled complications. "Why can't you just be happy believing you're in love and move forward now that the way is clear? Why can't you be a normal, rational, straightforward lover, and ask that wonderful woman if she'll marry you and let you help her, the world, and yourself? Yourself, who really needs it. Why—why—why can't you be sensible?" He shook his fist angrily at the sky. "Why waste your mind on these complicated thoughts? Why? Because, my friend, she definitely deserves it, and, by George, she will have it!"

He sat down and read the telegram once more. "Poor old chap!" he thought. "Dead ... and of measles. Lord! it's hard not to laugh. A man who plotted and shook the chancelleries, in daily danger of poison or the sword, to die of measles! What a world of oddities! Poor devil ... I wonder how she takes it?"

He sat down and read the telegram again. "Poor guy!" he thought. "Dead ... and of measles. Wow! It's hard not to laugh. A man who schemed and affected governments, always in danger of poison or a sword, to die of measles! What a world of oddities! Poor guy ... I wonder how she’s handling it?"

The remembrance of the forced marriage led him to think that she could not feel it too cruelly. No doubt she had liked him—had even felt affection for him. But the compulsion of wedlock and the death of her only son would not but make the tie more light than usual. "Let's hope so, anyway," he growled to himself, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. "Lionel, you were selfish to talk of love so soon. More especially when you don't know yet if you love her or not."

The memory of the forced marriage made him think that she couldn’t feel it too painfully. She probably had liked him—she might have even had feelings for him. But the pressure of marriage and the loss of her only son would likely make the bond feel less intense than usual. "Let’s hope so, anyway," he muttered to himself, shifting awkwardly in his chair. "Lionel, you were selfish to mention love so soon. Especially when you still don’t know if you love her or not."

Miss Arkwright came across the lawn. There had been no more talk of his departure. Since his noble rescue—five nights agone—it had been impossible to be harsh. There had been an interview next morning in which considerable frankness had been displayed on both sides. Miss Arkwright had asked him to repeat his explanation of Mizzi's presence in his bedroom, and this he had done cheerfully enough. In return, he had inquired what Mizzi was doing there, and had accused his hostess of conspiracy. "I feel," he had said, "that it is time we understand each other. Cards on the table, please. As you may know or guess, I came here to watch you, believing you to be in the service of the Turks."

Miss Arkwright walked across the lawn. There hadn’t been any more talk about his departure. Since his brave rescue five nights ago, it had been impossible to be harsh. The next morning, they had a conversation where both sides were very open. Miss Arkwright had asked him to repeat his explanation about Mizzi being in his bedroom, and he did so quite willingly. In return, he asked what Mizzi was doing there and accused his hostess of plotting. “I feel,” he said, “that it’s time we understand each other. Let’s lay all the cards on the table. As you may know or suspect, I came here to watch you, thinking you were working for the Turks.”

"Absurd!" Winifred had replied. "I can not explain all now, but my sister is mistaken. Mizzi applied for a situation through a registry office, and only came the night you discovered her. I have questioned her, and though I believe your explanation of her presence, it is best for us all that she should not stay.—Oh, I have taken care that she shall not suffer financially.—I am sure your suspicions of her are as groundless as my sister's of me. In any case, I have no intention of conducting an inquiry into so flimsy a charge. Now we know where we are. If you will be pleased to prolong your stay, I shall be glad. Perhaps you will learn to believe in me at last." He did not believe her in the least, but the knowledge that he was no longer there on false pretenses was no small solace, and he stayed on.

"Absurd!" Winifred replied. "I can't explain everything right now, but my sister is wrong. Mizzi applied for a job through a staffing agency and only came the night you found her. I've talked to her, and while I believe your explanation for her presence, it's best for all of us that she doesn't stay. —Oh, I've made sure she won't suffer financially. —I'm sure your suspicions about her are just as baseless as my sister's suspicions about me. In any case, I have no plans to investigate such a flimsy accusation. Now we know where we stand. If you’d like to extend your stay, I’d be happy. Maybe you'll finally start to trust me." He didn’t believe her at all, but knowing that he was no longer there under false pretenses gave him some comfort, so he stayed.

"Well," said Miss Arkwright, approaching, "let us go and look at our prisoner. Have you seen him this morning?"

"Well," said Miss Arkwright, walking over, "let's go check on our prisoner. Have you seen him this morning?"

"Not since breakfast," said Lionel, rising. "What is his job to-day?"

"Not since breakfast," Lionel said as he stood up. "What's his job today?"

"Digging and wheeling," answered Miss Arkwright with a smile. "I am told that he shapes well."

"Digging and wheeling," replied Miss Arkwright with a smile. "I've heard he has a good shape."

They walked round the back of the house, and presently came upon a second lawn. Across this was laid a narrow footway of planks. As they approached a figure was seen wheeling a small barrow of earth toward an embryonic flower bed. The figure came to the end of the causeway, upset his load with a professional side-twist, and then wiped his brow. "I believe that is always done," he said apologetically to the lady, who had halted with her cavalier: "one picks up a wrinkle here and there. Your gardener, for instance, showed me how the navvies unload their barrows, correcting my natural impulse to upset it straight ahead."

They walked around the back of the house and soon found a second lawn. Laying across it was a narrow pathway made of planks. As they got closer, they saw someone wheeling a small wheelbarrow filled with dirt toward a new flower bed. The person reached the end of the walkway, tipped the load with a practiced twist, and then wiped his brow. "I think that’s the way it’s always done," he said apologetically to the lady, who had stopped with her companion. "You pick up a few tips here and there. For example, your gardener showed me how the workers unload their wheelbarrows, correcting my instinct to dump it straight ahead."

"Do you feel tired?" asked Miss Arkwright critically: there was no sympathy in her tone.

"Are you feeling tired?" Miss Arkwright asked critically; there was no sympathy in her tone.

"The masses are used to that," answered Tony. "In time, no doubt, I shall learn the trick of doing the maximum of work with the minimum of effort. No, I can't say I am especially tired; it's rather a healthy feeling on the whole."

"The crowds are used to that," Tony replied. "Eventually, I’m sure I’ll figure out how to get the most done with the least amount of effort. No, I wouldn’t say I’m particularly tired; it’s actually a pretty good feeling overall."

"You're making a bit of a mess of the lawn," observed Lionel, his glance falling on a scarred patch.

"You're making quite a mess of the lawn," Lionel noted, his gaze landing on a damaged spot.

"Ah! that was in the apprentice stage," said Tony airily. "The barrow ran off the plank, and this narrow wheel cuts. Of course I am always open to learn, and if you——"

"Ah! that was during my apprentice days," said Tony casually. "The barrow slipped off the plank, and this narrow wheel digs in. Of course, I’m always eager to learn, and if you——"

"Mr. Mortimer is a guest, not a serf," Miss Arkwright reminded him. Tony bowed.

"Mr. Mortimer is a guest, not a servant," Miss Arkwright reminded him. Tony bowed.

"I apologize. For a moment I had forgotten class distinctions. Beg pardon, mum! By your leave, sir! I must be gettin' back to my job."

"I’m sorry. For a moment, I forgot about social classes. Excuse me, ma'am! With your permission, sir! I need to get back to work."

He trundled the barrow briskly out of sight to where a mound of soil awaited his efforts. He was soon back, however, and another load of soil was deposited dexterously upon the growing bed.

He quickly wheeled the barrow out of sight to where a pile of dirt was waiting for him. He was soon back, though, and another load of soil was skillfully dumped onto the expanding bed.

"You're still obstinate," said the lady, smiling.

"You're still stubborn," said the lady, smiling.

"Meaning——?" He paused, shovel in hand.

"Meaning—?" He paused, holding the shovel.

"That you won't give any account of yourself."

"That you won't explain anything about yourself."

"Why should I?" asked Tony innocently. "I am the slave of a perfectly charming despot"—he bowed again with grace, despite his costume and the mud stains. "I am well housed and fed. I have nothing special to do. I am regaining the rude health of youth——"

"Why should I?" Tony asked innocently. "I’m the slave of a perfectly charming dictator"—he bowed again gracefully, despite his outfit and the mud stains. "I have a nice place to stay and good food. I don’t have anything special to do. I'm getting back the rough health of youth——"

"But you have to work!" Lionel reminded him with a laugh. "And judging from your hands I don't think you've done much of that in your life."

"But you have to work!" Lionel reminded him with a laugh. "And looking at your hands, I don't think you've done much of that in your life."

Tony waved one of the despised hands.

Tony waved one of the hated hands.

"It is a popular error to speak of manual laborers as 'the working classes.' There is such a thing as brain-work—no! I don't press the point. As a matter of fact, I am rather attracted by this kind of work—for a change. Perhaps, when I regain my freedom, I shall then take up some sort of work as a hobby."

"It’s a common mistake to refer to manual workers as 'the working class.' There’s also something called intellectual work—no! I won’t dwell on that. Honestly, I’m somewhat drawn to this kind of work—for a change. Maybe when I get my freedom back, I’ll pick up some kind of work as a hobby."

"You can be free as soon as you like," said Miss Arkwright carelessly.

"You can be free whenever you want," said Miss Arkwright nonchalantly.

"Ah! but at a price! You want the secret of my life. I shall only tell you the tragic story when you tell me something of yours. Meanwhile I am quite content to labor here on parole. It is true that I am forbidden the village—I am not even near enough the wall to pass the time of day (is that the local phrase?) with the outside world. But until I know more I am not anxious to leave the most delightful tyrant I have ever met."

"Ah! But it comes at a cost! You want the secret of my life. I'll only share my tragic story if you share something about yours first. For now, I'm happy to work here on parole. It's true that I'm banned from the village—I can't even get close enough to the wall to chat with the outside world (is that how people say it around here?). But until I learn more, I'm not in a hurry to leave the most charming tyrant I've ever known."

"You ought to think yourself lucky," said Lionel, "that you're not cooling your heels in jail."

"You should consider yourself lucky," said Lionel, "that you're not stuck waiting in jail."

"By all accounts," said Tony blandly, "I might retort with a tu quoque."

"From what I hear," said Tony casually, "I could respond with a tu quoque."

"What do you mean?" asked Lionel, puzzled. "What do you know of me?"

"What do you mean?" Lionel asked, confused. "What do you know about me?"

Tony shrugged.

Tony just shrugged.

"That is part of the feuilleton," he said. "As soon as you like, we shall exchange stories. Meanwhile, permit the horny-handed aristocrat to pass along."

"That's part of the serialized story," he said. "Whenever you're ready, we'll swap stories. In the meantime, let the hardworking aristocrat move on."

He went off again, whistling, leaving his questioners unsatisfied. In spite of the mystery of his presence, in spite of the recent struggle, both Lionel and his hostess felt an instinctive liking for Tony. It had been Miss Arkwright's idea to set him to work. After the capture Lionel suggested a medieval treatment of bread-and-water in a locked chamber. Police proceedings were naturally out of the question. But Miss Arkwright was original in her methods, and after an interview with the unabashed intruder, had given him a choice of penalties. Either he might elect for the modern equivalent of the deepest dungeon beneath the moat, or he might work in the garden on parole. She saw he was a gentleman, and suspected him of being an interesting addition to The Quiet House. So Tony was admitted to the drawing-room on an equality with themselves. The mornings and afternoons he spent in forced labor, a victim of the corvée; his mid-day meal and "four o'clocks" were harmoniously eaten in the potting-shed. It was curious to observe a grimy navvy enter by the back door, to appear in the drawing-room later dressed in a lounge suit, with hair carefully parted. When he played or sang to them it seemed still more incongruous, but they were all adaptable creatures and there was no constraint.

He walked off again, whistling, leaving those who questioned him unsatisfied. Despite the mystery surrounding him and the recent chaos, both Lionel and his hostess felt an instinctive fondness for Tony. It had been Miss Arkwright's idea to put him to work. After the capture, Lionel suggested a medieval punishment of bread-and-water in a locked room. Police intervention was out of the question. But Miss Arkwright had unique methods, and after talking with the unapologetic intruder, she offered him a choice of punishments. He could either choose the modern equivalent of a deep dungeon beneath the moat, or he could work in the garden on parole. She recognized he was a gentleman and suspected he would be an interesting addition to The Quiet House. So, Tony was allowed into the drawing-room as their equal. He spent his mornings and afternoons in forced labor, a victim of the corvée; his lunch and "four o'clocks" were happily eaten in the potting shed. It was amusing to see a dirty laborer come in through the back door and later appear in the drawing-room dressed in a suit, with his hair neatly combed. When he played or sang for them, it seemed even more out of place, but they were all adaptable folks, and there was no tension.

This morning it was very hot, and Lionel and Winifred went back to the hammock-chairs in the shade. The heat made the air flicker like waves, and even the midges seemed too lazy to come out. A universal torpor hung heavily in the atmosphere; one thought regretfully of slaves in offices, clerks on stools, perspiring operators in factories. For, whether it be hot or cold, work has to be done by all save the leisured classes. And even they are sometimes compelled to exert themselves either by force of circumstances or a sense of duty.

This morning it was really hot, and Lionel and Winifred returned to the hammock chairs in the shade. The heat made the air shimmer like waves, and even the tiny bugs seemed too lazy to come out. A total lethargy hung heavily in the atmosphere; one thought sadly of workers in offices, clerks on stools, sweating operators in factories. Because, whether it's hot or cold, everyone except the privileged classes has to work. And even they are sometimes pushed to get moving, either because of circumstances or a sense of responsibility.

It was the latter spur that roused the Reverend Charles Peters to get to work on his sermon for next Sunday. True, there were still three days' grace; but it had been his immemorial custom to begin to write his sermon on a Wednesday, and nothing short of a new heresy in the morning's newspaper could have kept him from his desk. Whether the garden tempted him to dally amid roses, or a keen frost suggested the pleasures of a brisk walk—whether he felt disponiert and stored with telling phrases, or empty as a sieve with the wind blowing through—whether his digestion was in first-class order or cried aloud for a liver-pill,—whatever conditions obtained, duty and habit drew Mr. Peters to a task not uncongenial. So, on this morning he went to his work as usual, despite the heat, not slothful enough to delve in a well-filled drawer and read over some "cold meat" for his parishioners. He established himself in the dining-room—luckily, as it proved—for his study was being "turned out."

It was the latter motivation that got Reverend Charles Peters to start working on his sermon for next Sunday. True, he still had three days to go; but it had always been his habit to start writing his sermon on a Wednesday, and nothing less than a shocking news story could have kept him away from his desk. Whether the garden lured him to linger among the roses, or a sharp frost made a brisk walk appealing—whether he felt inspired and full of great phrases, or empty as a sieve with the wind blowing through—whether his digestion was perfect or crying out for a liver pill—whatever the circumstances, duty and habit guided Mr. Peters to a task he didn't mind. So, on that morning, he began his work as usual, despite the heat, not lazy enough to dig through a well-filled drawer and read over some "leftovers" for his parishioners. He settled himself in the dining room—luckily, as it turned out—because his study was being cleared out.

As a preliminary he threw open both windows and removed his jacket and waistcoat. Then he lighted a pipe and settled down to arrange his thoughts. He had not been meditating for more than ten minutes when his wife came in.

As a first step, he opened both windows and took off his jacket and vest. Then he lit a pipe and got comfortable to sort out his thoughts. He hadn’t been thinking for more than ten minutes when his wife walked in.

"The milkman's account, Charles," she said. "Can you settle it now?"

"The milkman's bill, Charles," she said. "Can you take care of it now?"

"Certainly, my dear," replied the vicar, unlocking his cash-box. "It's extremely hot this morning, isn't it?"

"Of course, my dear," replied the vicar, unlocking his cash box. "It's really hot this morning, isn't it?"

"It is," agreed Mrs. Peters, waiting for the money. "But, Charles——"

"It is," Mrs. Peters agreed, waiting for the money. "But, Charles——"

"Yes, my dear?"

"Yes, darling?"

"Do you think it quite seemly to be writing your sermon in shirt-sleeves?"

"Do you really think it's appropriate to be writing your sermon in your shirt sleeves?"

"It's extremely hot, Clara."

"It's super hot, Clara."

"Yes. But a sermon, Charles!"

"Yes. But a sermon, Charles!"

The vicar laughed.

The priest laughed.

"Would you have me write it behind stained-glass windows, with incense burning round me?"

"Do you want me to write it behind stained-glass windows, with incense burning around me?"

"A strict Evangelical——!!!"

"A strict Evangelical—!!!"

"I was only joking, Clara," said the vicar quickly. "Of course, I shouldn't dream of——"

"I was just kidding, Clara," the vicar said quickly. "Of course, I wouldn't even think of——"

"I do not think one should be flippant under such circumstances. Shirt-sleeves and a pipe! My dear Charles——"

"I don’t think anyone should be casual in situations like this. Shirt sleeves and a pipe! My dear Charles——"

The vicar moved a little restlessly.

The vicar shifted slightly, feeling uneasy.

"My dear Clara, the day's very hot and I'm doing nothing to be ashamed of. If the bishop of London called I'm sure he'd say——"

"My dear Clara, it's really hot today, and I'm not doing anything to be ashamed of. If the bishop of London called, I'm sure he'd say——"

"Mr. Bangs," said the housemaid at the door, and Robert entered with a troubled mien.

"Mr. Bangs," said the housemaid at the door, and Robert walked in with a worried expression.

The vicar made a dash for his discarded garments and performed a Protean act with amazing speed. His wife, true to her salt, interposed between her husband and the visitor, making a few banal remarks about the weather. She did not shake hands.

The vicar rushed to grab his discarded clothes and changed with unbelievable speed. His wife, being loyal as ever, stepped in between him and the visitor, making a few small talk comments about the weather. She didn't offer her hand to shake.

"Excuse me, Mr. Bangs," said the vicar, blushing despite his late assertions of independence. "You find me trying to keep cool under adverse conditions. Had I known——"

"Excuse me, Mr. Bangs," said the vicar, blushing even though he had recently claimed to be independent. "I'm just trying to stay calm under tough circumstances. If I'd known——"

"The weather is very sultry, is it not?" said Mrs. Peters, with a glare that said, "I told you so!"

"The weather is really muggy, isn’t it?" said Mrs. Peters, with a look that said, "I told you so!"

Robert surveyed them with a wild and unreceptive eye. He looked, so thought the vicar's wife, like a man dogged by the officers of the law.

Robert looked at them with a crazy and unwelcoming gaze. The vicar's wife thought he resembled a man haunted by law enforcement.

"I called," he said quickly, "because I wanted your advice and help."

"I called," he said quickly, "because I wanted your advice and support."

"Certainly, if I can be of any use," replied the vicar. "Clara, my love——?"

"Of course, if I can help in any way," replied the vicar. "Clara, my dear——?"

His tone indicated a request that she would leave them. To the vicar's intense surprise, his love made no sign of compliance. "Perhaps I had better stay, Charles," she said grimly.

His tone suggested that she should leave them alone. To the vicar's great surprise, the woman he loved didn’t show any intention to comply. "Maybe I should stay, Charles," she said sternly.

"But, Clara——"

"But, Clara—"

"I—I should like to speak to your husband alone," said Robert, nervous but determined. "You see, it is very private——"

"I—I would like to talk to your husband alone," said Robert, feeling nervous but resolute. "You see, it’s very private——"

"Of course, Mr. Bangs. I quite understand. Perfectly natural. My dear——"

"Of course, Mr. Bangs. I completely understand. Totally normal. My dear——"

"I think not, Charles. Mr. Bangs will understand why."

"I don't think so, Charles. Mr. Bangs will get it."

"I don't at all," said Robert, dismayed and puzzled. "I have come here for advice and help. As a matter of fact, I have to make a confession——"

"I don't at all," said Robert, feeling confused and upset. "I came here for advice and support. Actually, I need to confess——"

The vicar shrank.

The vicar shrank away.

"I do not hear confessions," he said. "I do not approve——"

"I don't hear confessions," he said. "I don't approve——"

"Evangelical," snapped Clara. (Yes: there are vicar's wives who snap, and she was one.)

"Evangelical," Clara said sharply. (Yes: there are vicar's wives who are sharp, and she was one.)

"I don't understand," repeated Robert wearily. Then suddenly a light broke on him, and he laughed. It was his first laugh for five days. "Oh, I see! I don't mean that kind of confession. This is purely a personal matter—man to man."

"I don't get it," Robert said tiredly. Then suddenly, it clicked for him, and he laughed. It was the first time he had laughed in five days. "Oh, I get it! I don't mean that kind of confession. This is just a personal matter—man to man."

"In that case, my love, I think——"

"In that case, my love, I think——"

"No," said the resolute woman. "I am determined that you shall not be imposed on any longer. I have kept silence, perhaps too long. Mr. Bangs, yesterday I telephoned to Bloomsbury 843B."

"No," said the determined woman. "I am set on making sure you won't be taken advantage of any longer. I've stayed quiet, maybe for too long. Mr. Bangs, I called Bloomsbury 843B yesterday."

"What!" said Robert with a moan. "You telephoned there!"

"What!" Robert exclaimed with a groan. "You called them!"


CHAPTER XXIII

STILL RUNNING

With a glance of triumphant contempt at the bladder she had pricked so easily, Mrs. Peters turned to her husband. "I think, Charles, that I can safely leave you now to hear Mr. Hedderwick's explanation. I have no wish to be present during a painful scene; besides, I am wanted in the larder."

With a look of victorious disdain at the bladder she had punctured so effortlessly, Mrs. Peters turned to her husband. "I think, Charles, that I can confidently leave you to listen to Mr. Hedderwick's explanation now. I don't want to be here for an uncomfortable scene; besides, I need to go to the pantry."

"Mr. Hedderwick!" repeated the vicar blankly. "What do you mean, Clara? I can not understand—I have no idea—you must——"

"Mr. Hedderwick!" repeated the vicar in confusion. "What are you talking about, Clara? I don’t understand—I have no clue—you need to——"

"He will tell you," said the lady, vouchsafing nothing further. After all, she had had a fair share of the lime-light, and there was no need to risk an anticlimax. "If you had only listened to me when I warned you ... but there! men are all alike."

"He will tell you," the lady said, offering no more information. After all, she had already enjoyed quite a bit of attention, and there was no need to risk disappointing anyone. "If you had just listened to me when I warned you ... but there! Men are all the same."

She swept from the room, and the bewildered clergyman appealed to the heap in the chair.

She stormed out of the room, and the confused clergyman turned to the pile of clothes in the chair.

"Mr. Bangs—Mr. Hedderwick, perhaps I ought to say—will you be kind enough to tell me what it all means?"

"Mr. Bangs—Mr. Hedderwick, I suppose I should say—could you please tell me what this all means?"

Robert raised a stricken head.

Robert lifted his wounded head.

"I thought, Mr. Peters, that things were bad enough when I came. Your wife's news proves to me that I am wrong. My name is not Bangs, but Hedderwick."

"I thought, Mr. Peters, that things were tough enough when I arrived. Your wife's news shows me that I was mistaken. My name isn't Bangs, it's Hedderwick."

"So I gathered," said the vicar uncomfortably. "I think you owe me an explanation of your reasons for adopting a false name."

"So I figured," said the vicar, feeling uneasy. "I think you owe me an explanation for why you chose to use a fake name."

Robert glanced wildly at the clock.

Robert looked anxiously at the clock.

"There is no time to go into details now. She may be here at any minute. But for the moment, Mr. Peters, please accept my word that I am involved in no disgrace—no shameful action. I am a churchwarden——"

"There’s no time to go into details right now. She could be here any minute. But for now, Mr. Peters, please take my word that I’m not involved in any disgrace—no shameful actions. I’m a churchwarden——"

"You really are?" There was excuse for the implied doubt.

"You really are?" There was reason for the implied doubt.

"I really am, and innocent. My fault is an excessive love for romance and a temporary desertion of my wife. Oh! do not misunderstand me!" he begged, as he noticed an ecclesiastical stiffening. "I simply ran away for a short holiday—I meant to go back very soon! Surely, surely, you can understand! You are married—I mean, a clergyman in the exercise of his duties must have a wide knowledge of the world—a certain sympathy...."

"I really am innocent. My only fault is having an excessive love for romance and temporarily leaving my wife. Oh! Please don't misunderstand me!" he pleaded, noticing the sudden stiffening in the clergyman. "I just took a short holiday—I meant to return very soon! Surely, you can understand! You are married—I mean, a clergyman in his work must have a broad understanding of the world—a certain sympathy...."

"I can understand," said the vicar thoughtfully, perhaps flattered at the tribute to his worldly knowledge. "I can not praise—possibly can not sympathize; but at least I may fairly claim to understand."

"I get it," said the vicar thoughtfully, perhaps feeling flattered by the acknowledgment of his worldly knowledge. "I might not be able to praise—possibly can't empathize; but at least I can honestly say I understand."

"Thank you—thank you! Well, to be as brief as I can (and every minute is precious!), my friend and I had reason to suspect the occupants of The Quiet House——"

"Thank you—thank you! To keep it short (because every minute counts!), my friend and I had a reason to be suspicious of the people living in The Quiet House——"

"Ha!" The vicar pricked up his ears. "Certain hints and whisperings have drifted round to me in the course of my parochial visiting, but——"

"Ha!" The vicar perked up. "I've heard some hints and whispers during my visits around the parish, but——"

"Please, please, don't interrupt. You forget the London train! Mr. Wild and I entered The Quiet House garden by night to watch——"

"Please, please, don't interrupt. You forgot about the London train! Mr. Wild and I entered The Quiet House garden at night to watch——"

"Surely that——"

"That’s for sure—"

"Yes—yes—yes! Most reprehensible, but you do not know all. We watched, were discovered, and in making our escape Mr. Wild was captured. I have not seen him since."

"Yes—yes—yes! It's really shameful, but you don't know the whole story. We were watching, got caught, and while trying to escape, Mr. Wild was captured. I haven't seen him since."

"What!"

"What?!"

"For five days I have been alone, miserable, in doubt and anguish. I have wondered, waited, made cautious inquiries. Nothing has happened. What am I to do?"

"For five days, I’ve been alone, feeling miserable, uncertain, and in pain. I've wondered, waited, and asked careful questions. Nothing has changed. What should I do?"

"You suspect——?" queried the vicar in delightful horror. He felt his hair bristling in anticipation.

"You suspect——?" asked the vicar in thrilling shock. He could feel his hair standing on end in excitement.

"I do not know ... I can not guess. They say it is high politics—the Turkish government.... A spy.... I do not know what to believe. What can I do?"

"I don't know ... I can't guess. They say it's high politics—the Turkish government.... A spy.... I don't know what to believe. What can I do?"

The vicar, who prided himself on being a business man, mused for a moment, chin on hand.

The vicar, who took pride in being a businessman, thought for a moment, resting his chin on his hand.

"Suppose," he said brightly, "that Mott, the local policeman, applied for a search-warrant?"

"Imagine," he said cheerfully, "if Mott, the local cop, requested a search warrant?"

"I would rather not invoke the aid of the police, if possible. There may be nothing serious after all, and in that case we should look ridiculous. Besides ... I wondered if you could call?"

"I'd prefer not to involve the police, if we can avoid it. It might not be anything serious, and that would make us look silly. Also... I was wondering if you could make the call?"

The vicar seemed pleased, but apprehensive.

The vicar appeared happy, yet a bit anxious.

"Of course," he said, "I would face any danger if necessary and for a good cause. But I have my flock to think of.... If matters are as serious as you suggest, might there not be a second kidnaping? One hesitates to be melodramatic, but the possibilities of...."

"Of course," he said, "I would risk anything if I had to and for a good cause. But I have my flock to consider.... If things are as serious as you say, could there be another kidnapping? One doesn't want to overreact, but the possibilities of...."

"They would not dare to touch a minister of the church. There would be an outcry——"

"They wouldn't dare to touch a minister of the church. There would be an uproar——"

"True ... true ... but would they admit me? I have called and been denied. Do you think——"

"True ... true ... but would they let me in? I've called and been turned away. Do you think——"

He paused, as a motor-horn sounded from the road. The noise of the engine was plainly heard. A moment later and the gate leading to the drive opened. The vicar walked to the window.

He paused when a car horn blared from the road. The sound of the engine was clearly audible. Moments later, the gate to the driveway swung open. The vicar walked over to the window.

"Who can this be?" he said in surprise. "A motor-car, and in the morning! I hope he'll be careful of the borders."

"Who could this be?" he said, surprised. "A car, and in the morning! I hope he’ll be careful of the edges."

Robert joined him at the window, his heart filled with anxious questioning. As he watched the car drive slowly in he clutched the vicar's arm. "She has changed her plan!" he gasped. "It's my wife! You must hide me quick!"

Robert joined him at the window, his heart racing with worry. As he watched the car pull in slowly, he gripped the vicar's arm. "She changed her mind!" he exclaimed. "It's my wife! You have to hide me fast!"

"B—but," stammered Mr. Peters, "there's no sense in that! Pull yourself together, Mr. Bangs—Mr. Hedderwick, I mean. You say you have done nothing wrong. Why not face her and get it over at once like a man?"

"B—but," stammered Mr. Peters, "that doesn’t make any sense! Get a hold of yourself, Mr. Bangs—Mr. Hedderwick, I mean. You say you haven’t done anything wrong. Why not just face her and get it over with like a man?"

Robert, pallid in face and soul, gripped him more tightly, his knees shaking. The desperate need of the moment scorned the veneer of discretion. "You said you understood," he hissed fiercely. "Do you always stand up to Mrs. Peters?"

Robert, pale in both face and spirit, held on to him more tightly, his knees trembling. The urgent need of the moment disregarded any pretense of restraint. "You said you understood," he whispered intensely. "Do you always confront Mrs. Peters?"

The vicar avoided his eye, but his answer brought hope to Robert. "Come along!" he said briskly, going to the door. He threw it open, and was disappointed to find his wife in the hall. That way of escape was blocked. "A caller, my dear!" he said, trying to cover his embarrassment. "If I'm wanted, I shall be in here." He returned to the room and closed the door. "You're caught, Mr. Hedderwick, I'm afraid. I'm very sorry, but you'll have to face it, after all."

The vicar looked away, but his response gave Robert some hope. "Come on!" he said cheerfully, heading to the door. He flung it open, only to feel let down when he saw his wife in the hallway. That exit was blocked. "A visitor, my dear!" he said, trying to hide his embarrassment. "If I'm needed, I'll be in here." He went back into the room and shut the door. "You're trapped, Mr. Hedderwick, I'm afraid. I'm really sorry, but you’ll have to confront it after all."

"No, no!" said Robert. "Isn't there another door—a window?"

"No, no!" said Robert. "Isn't there another door—or a window?"

"The chauffeur's outside. Yes; by jove! there's the buttery hatch. Behind the screen! Get through that and out of the pantry window! It opens on the back. After that you must look out for yourself. I won't tell any lies on your behalf, but—but I'll try to give you a—a sporting start!"

"The driver is outside. Yes; wow! There's the service window. Go behind the screen! Get through that and out of the pantry window! It opens at the back. After that, you’re on your own. I won’t lie for you, but—I’ll try to give you a—fighting chance!"

Robert breathed a blessing on his head. Then, with some ado, he lifted the hatch and crawled through. The vicar closed it behind him, heard the pantry window open with a noiseless chuckle, and then braced himself to face a pair of indignant ladies. He had not long to wait, for, a minute after Robert had gained the road, Mrs. Peters introduced his visitor. Mrs. Hedderwick glanced round the room much as a terrier who has been told there is a rat about, and without waiting for apologies or declarations, said with an extraordinary bitterness, "Where is my husband?"

Robert received a blessing on his head. Then, with some effort, he lifted the hatch and crawled through. The vicar closed it behind him, heard the pantry window open with a quiet chuckle, and then prepared himself to deal with a pair of upset ladies. He didn’t have to wait long, because a minute after Robert hit the road, Mrs. Peters introduced his visitor. Mrs. Hedderwick looked around the room like a terrier who’s been told there’s a rat nearby, and without waiting for apologies or explanations, said with intense bitterness, "Where is my husband?"

"He was here a moment ago," replied the vicar, nervous, but not without a certain enjoyment of the scene. "I suppose that you are looking forward to—a reunion—a——"

"He was just here a moment ago," replied the vicar, a bit anxious but also enjoying the situation. "I guess you're looking forward to—a reunion—a——"

"I am," said Mrs. Hedderwick with a vindictive quietness. "Where is he? Hiding under the table?"

"I am," said Mrs. Hedderwick with a spiteful calmness. "Where is he? Hiding under the table?"

"My dear madam," expostulated the vicar, suppressing a wish to get there himself, so alarming was her eye, "do you imagine——"

"My dear madam," the vicar exclaimed, holding back a desire to go there himself, so unsettling was her gaze, "do you think——"

"I want to know where he is!" interrupted the lady, still dangerously calm and determined. "Mrs. Peters most kindly—most kindly telephoned to say that he was in Shereling, and she has just said that she left him here. Where is he?"

"I want to know where he is!" interrupted the lady, still dangerously calm and determined. "Mrs. Peters very kindly—very kindly called to say that he was in Shereling, and she just mentioned that she left him here. Where is he?"

"He has gone," said the vicar dreamily, looking out of the window and wondering whether Robert had reached The Happy Heart. A good runner, he reflected, might perhaps have succeeded, but Mr. Bangs was no longer young.

"He’s gone," said the vicar, gazing out of the window and wondering if Robert had made it to The Happy Heart. A good runner, he thought, might have managed it, but Mr. Bangs wasn’t young anymore.

"Gone!" ejaculated both ladies together, and for once in his life the amiable clergyman had the satisfaction of communicating dramatic and exclusive news.

"Gone!" both ladies exclaimed simultaneously, and for once in his life, the kind-hearted clergyman felt the thrill of sharing dramatic and exclusive news.

"Gone!" repeated Mrs. Peters. "Oh, Charles! Where? How?"

"Gone!" Mrs. Peters repeated. "Oh, Charles! Where? How?"

"Gone!" said Mrs. Hedderwick, with a rising inflection. "You have helped——"

"Gone!" said Mrs. Hedderwick, her voice getting higher. "You have helped——"

"How could I detain him?" urged the vicar, retreating behind a chair. "Why blame me? Could I be expected to keep him here by force? If Mr. Hedderwick preferred to depart by the buttery hatch——"

"How can I stop him?" the vicar insisted, backing away behind a chair. "Why are you blaming me? Am I supposed to keep him here against his will? If Mr. Hedderwick wanted to leave through the buttery hatch——"

"The buttery hatch."

"The buttery entrance."

"Let me show you," said the vicar helpfully, thinking that a reconstruction of the crime might divert a morbid interest in himself. "You see here it is, behind the screen. Mr. Hedderwick opened it, climbed through——"

"Let me show you," said the vicar helpfully, thinking that recreating the crime might distract from his own unsettling situation. "You see, it’s right here behind the screen. Mr. Hedderwick opened it and climbed through——"

"I do not believe it! It is too small for——"

"I can't believe it! It's too small for——"

"My dear madam," expostulated the vicar warmly, annoyed at having his veracity impugned, "I assure you it was so. Try for yourself!"

"My dear madam," the vicar protested warmly, frustrated at having his honesty questioned, "I assure you it was true. Try it for yourself!"

In her rage Mrs. Hedderwick raised her arm as if to strike the impious suggester. Mrs. Peters interposed, as the vicar quailed, and the situation was saved.

In her anger, Mrs. Hedderwick raised her arm as if to hit the disrespectful speaker. Mrs. Peters stepped in as the vicar recoiled, and the situation was diffused.

"Charles! What an indelicate thought! Imagine a lady like Mrs. Hedderwick crawling——"

"Charles! What a rude thought! Can you picture a lady like Mrs. Hedderwick crawling——"

The vicar had been through an anxious quarter of an hour. His nerves were on strings, and at any moment the tension might prove too strong. Had he been master of himself—had he possessed no sense of humor—had his late guest not presented so ridiculous an appearance in his exit, all might have yet been well. But the image projected upon his brain by the words of his wife (who had but an imperfect sympathy with comedy) was too much. He did not roar aloud, as he could have wished, but he buried his face in his hands and leaned upon the mantelpiece. The heaving of the shoulders gave evidence of his emotion.

The vicar had just gone through a tense fifteen minutes. His nerves were frayed, and at any moment the pressure could become overwhelming. If only he had been in control of himself—if he had lacked a sense of humor—if his recent guest hadn’t left such a ridiculous impression, things might have turned out differently. But the image created in his mind by his wife's words (who didn’t quite get comedy) was too much for him to handle. He didn't shout out, as he wanted to, but instead buried his face in his hands and leaned on the mantelpiece. The shaking of his shoulders showed how emotional he was.

"I think," said Mrs. Hedderwick, after a dreadful pause, "that your husband is hardly himself."

"I think," said Mrs. Hedderwick, after a long pause, "that your husband isn't really himself."

"I will attend to him presently," replied Mrs. Peters with menacing sympathy. "Come, Mrs. Hedderwick: I am sorry you should meet with such a disappointment. Your best course would be to drive to The Happy Heart, where I understand the fugitive is staying."

"I'll take care of him soon," Mrs. Peters said with a threatening kindness. "Come on, Mrs. Hedderwick: I'm sorry you're facing such a letdown. The best thing for you to do would be to head to The Happy Heart, where I hear the runaway is staying."

They left the room, without deigning to bestow any further notice on the vicar. He, unhappy man, pulled himself together too late. He wiped his eyes and rushed after them to offer seemly apologies. But as he reached his garden gate he saw the motor drive off. Behind the chauffeur were seated Mrs. Hedderwick and his wife. Mrs. Peters was resolved, if possible, to be in at the death.

They walked out of the room, ignoring the vicar completely. He, poor man, gathered himself a little too late. He wiped his tears and hurried after them to apologize. But when he got to his garden gate, he saw the car drive away. Seated behind the driver were Mrs. Hedderwick and his wife. Mrs. Peters was determined, if possible, to see it all unfold.

"After all," thought the vicar when he realized that he could do nothing to reestablish himself, "why shouldn't I, too, see what is going to happen? Hedderwick suggested I should call at The Quiet House.... I might try again.... His suspicion, surely, can not be founded on fact, but at least it will be interesting—nay, a positive duty! If a fellow creature wants our services, we ought to spare neither time nor trouble—well, Brown! what is it?"

"After all," thought the vicar when he realized he couldn't do anything to get himself back on track, "why shouldn't I see what's going to happen? Hedderwick suggested I should visit The Quiet House... I might try again... His suspicion surely can't be based on reality, but at least it'll be interesting—no, it’s a positive duty! If someone needs our help, we shouldn’t hold back on time or effort—well, Brown! What is it?"

"Beg pardon, sir!" said the odd-job man, touching his hat. Mr. Peters noticed with astonishment that he was in his Sunday clothes. "I want to give notice!"

"Excuse me, sir!" said the handyman, tipping his hat. Mr. Peters was surprised to see that he was in his Sunday best. "I want to quit!"

"I can't be bothered with that now," said the vicar impatiently. "I am particularly busy. Come to me——"

"I can't deal with that right now," said the vicar impatiently. "I’m really busy. Come to me——"

"I am sorry, sir, but I want to go at once," he said, interrupting the vicar.

"I’m sorry, sir, but I need to leave right away," he said, interrupting the vicar.

The latter stared.

The latter stared intently.

"But that's most unusual and inconsiderate. If you want to go, a week's notice——"

"But that's really unusual and thoughtless. If you want to leave, you should give a week's notice——"

"It's too important for that, sir. Of course I am ready to forego my week's wages, but go I must."

"It's too important for that, sir. Of course, I'm willing to give up my week's pay, but I have to go."

"Not a death in the family, I hope?" said Mr. Peters, subduing the impatience of his tone. "If so, I'm very sorry, and of course——"

"Not a death in the family, I hope?" Mr. Peters said, trying to hold back the impatience in his voice. "If that’s the case, I’m really sorry, and of course——"

"No, sir: nothing serious—serious in that sense at least. I am sorry to have to give notice in such a hurry, but it must be done."

"No, sir: nothing serious—at least not in that way. I'm sorry to have to give notice so suddenly, but it needs to be done."

"Very well," replied the vicar, resuming an every-day voice. "Legally, of course, you couldn't demand your wages; but I have no intention of standing on the letter of the law. I might as well pay you now. Let's see——" He searched his pockets for change.

"Okay," the vicar said, switching back to a normal tone. "Legally, you can't really demand your pay; but I'm not planning to stick to the strict letter of the law. I might as well pay you now. Let’s see——" He started looking through his pockets for some change.

"Thank you, sir," replied the odd-job man. "You're very good to be so reasonable, and I wish I could oblige you by staying. Instead, if you'll kindly put a sovereign in the poor-box for me, I shall be satisfied."

"Thank you, sir," replied the handyman. "You're really nice to be so understanding, and I wish I could help by staying. Instead, if you could please put a sovereign in the donation box for me, I would appreciate it."

"Eh—eh!" stammered the vicar. "Has all the world gone mad this morning? A sovereign in the poor-box, from my gardener! Wh—what——"

"Eh—eh!" stuttered the vicar. "Has everyone lost their minds this morning? A pound in the donation box, from my gardener! Wh—what——"

"A little mad, sir?" smiled Henry Brown. "Perhaps there's some excuse. Good-by and thank you."

"A bit crazy, sir?" smiled Henry Brown. "Maybe there's a reason for it. Goodbye and thanks."

He touched his hat and left the Shereling garden forever. Mr. Peters stared dumbly after him. He could make nothing of it, however, so he came to the sensible resolution of setting out on his investigations at once. Taking a stick in his hand, he trudged toward The Quiet House. Here, by the way, he was told there was nobody at home.

He tipped his hat and left the Shereling garden for good. Mr. Peters stood there, speechless, watching him go. He couldn't figure it out, so he wisely decided to start his investigations right away. Grabbing a stick, he walked toward The Quiet House. By the way, he was informed that no one was home.

Henry Brown, whistling a cheerful strain, betook himself to The Happy Heart. He found the motor-car standing outside, the chauffeur indulging in a cigarette. Voices from the parlor indicated that the landlord was trying to reason with two ladies, neither of whom seemed to be amenable to treatment.

Henry Brown, whistling a happy tune, made his way to The Happy Heart. He saw the car parked outside, the driver enjoying a cigarette. Voices coming from the parlor showed that the landlord was trying to reason with two ladies, neither of whom seemed to be open to discussion.

"But he's gorn, I tell you, ma'am," said the voice of Mr. Glew despairingly. "Ran in here, he did, a quarter of an hour ago: out again in five minutes——"

"But he's gone, I tell you, ma'am," said Mr. Glew's voice, filled with despair. "He rushed in here a quarter of an hour ago, and was out again in five minutes——"

"I think you are prevaricating, Glew," said the acid tones of Mrs. Peters. "Your manner is not straightforward at all this morning——"

"I think you’re being evasive, Glew," said Mrs. Peters in a sharp tone. "You’re not being straightforward at all this morning—"

"And we shan't be satisfied till you have shown us his room," added Mrs. Hedderwick. "So there!"

"And we won't be satisfied until you show us his room," added Mrs. Hedderwick. "So there!"

As the landlord resumed the mournful chant, apparently relying on tautological emphasis rather than reasoned argument or ocular demonstration (a suggestion that seemed unwelcome), Henry Brown smiled and passed into the bar. Addressing the Boots, a "lad" of sixty-three, who acted as barman, beater, stable-boy, or butler as occasion or the seasons demanded, he said, "Is Miss Schmidt ready?"

As the landlord continued the sad chant, relying more on repetitive emphasis than on logical reasoning or visual proof (a suggestion that seemed unwelcome), Henry Brown smiled and walked into the bar. He addressed the Boots, a “guy” of sixty-three, who worked as a bartender, handyman, stable-boy, or butler as needed, and asked, "Is Miss Schmidt ready?"

"B'leeve so," said the Boots. "But I'll tell her you're here."

"B'leeve so," said the Boots. "But I'll let her know you're here."

He went out, but returned shortly, followed by Mizzi, who was dressed for traveling. "Ah!" said she, with a radiant smile of welcome. "I have not kept you waiting long, have I?"

He went out but came back soon, followed by Mizzi, who was ready to travel. "Ah!" she said, with a bright smile. "I haven't made you wait too long, have I?"

"Five days," answered Henry, to the astonishment of the Boots. "Five wasted days. Can't think why you wanted to stay here all that time. After being——"

"Five days," Henry replied, surprising the Boots. "Five wasted days. I can't understand why you wanted to stay here so long. After being——"

He paused. He was about to say "sacked," but from consideration of his audience, refrained. Mizzi thanked him with a laugh.

He paused. He was about to say "fired," but thinking of his audience, he held back. Mizzi thanked him with a laugh.

"Ah!" she said very cheerfully. "The separation—shall we say?—was due to—guess!"

"Ah!" she said very cheerfully. "The separation—shall we say?—was due to—guess!"

"Dunno," said Henry, watching her fasten her glove with admiring eyes.

"Dunno," Henry said, watching her put on her glove with admiration.

"Jealousy!" she flashed, with a ripple of merriment. "Think of it! Jealousy! Even I could have hardly credited it. But I bear her no ill-will. On the contrary, I regard her as more human and could love her still more. (Bother—bother—r—r this glove. Can you——?")

"Jealousy!" she exclaimed, with a touch of amusement. "Can you believe it? Jealousy! I could hardly believe it myself. But I hold no grudges against her. On the contrary, I see her as more relatable and could love her even more. (Ugh—ugh—r—r this glove. Can you——?")

"But why did you wait?" he grumbled, fastening the glove and taking as long as he could for the pleasure of pressing her dainty wrist.

"But why did you wait?" he complained, putting on the glove and taking as long as possible to enjoy pressing her delicate wrist.

"I will be frank," she said, laughing temptingly. Henry dumbly cursed the Boots. "Curiosity! I wanted to watch a little longer. But I foresee the end of the play and am ready to go. Let us be off!"

"I'll be honest," she said, laughing playfully. Henry silently cursed the Boots. "Curiosity! I just wanted to watch a bit longer. But I see how the play is going to end and I'm ready to leave. Let's get going!"

"Your luggage has gone to the station?"

"Your luggage went to the station?"

"Yes, and it is time we followed. Come!"

"Yes, and it's time for us to go. Come on!"

"A kiss first," said Henry, hungrily bending forward.

"A kiss first," Henry said, leaning in eagerly.

At this moment Mrs. Peters, Mrs. Hedderwick and the landlord (the latter still emitting "But he's gorn—varnished, I tell you!") came from the parlor. They halted on observing the obvious sweethearts standing in the passage. Mrs. Peters, her finest instincts revolting from such a naked display of animalism—and in the morning, too!—at once relinquished the lacquered Mr. Hedderwick for a more congenial theme.

At that moment, Mrs. Peters, Mrs. Hedderwick, and the landlord (who was still saying, "But he's gone—varnished, I tell you!") came out of the parlor. They stopped when they saw the obvious couple standing in the hallway. Mrs. Peters, her better instincts repulsed by such a blatant display of animalism—and in the morning, no less!—quickly shifted her focus from the flashy Mr. Hedderwick to a more suitable topic.

"Brown!" she ejaculated in tones that would have chilled a satyr. "Brown! how disgusting! Go to your work at once!"

"Brown!" she exclaimed in a tone that would have sent shivers down the spine of a satyr. "Brown! How gross! Get to work right now!"

The odd-job man could not restrain a natural blush, but he was man enough to stand his ground. The presence of Mizzi confirmed his courage and quickened his wits.

The handyman couldn't help but blush, but he was tough enough to stand his ground. Mizzi's presence boosted his courage and sharpened his mind.

"Mr. Brown, if you please, ma'am," he said quietly but with resolution. "I've left your service and am my own master now."

"Mr. Brown, if you don't mind, ma'am," he said softly but firmly. "I've left your service and I'm my own boss now."

Mrs. Peters, justly annoyed at being thus spoken to by a menial, changed her line of attack.

Mrs. Peters, understandably annoyed at being talked to like that by a servant, switched her approach.

"So this is the explanation!" she said, wishing she had a lorgnette for Mizzi's benefit. She surveyed her with a severity that ought to have appalled. The survey gave her no comfort, for Mizzi was dressed to perfection. "So this is the young woman!"

"So this is the explanation!" she said, wishing she had a pair of glasses for Mizzi's sake. She looked at her with a seriousness that should have shocked her. The look provided no reassurance, as Mizzi was dressed flawlessly. "So this is the young woman!"

"A deplorable exhibition," said Mrs. Hedderwick dispassionately. "The lower classes—"

"A terrible display," Mrs. Hedderwick said without emotion. "The lower classes—"

The young woman gave a most impertinent laugh, and said, "Come, Henry! We shall miss the train!"

The young woman let out a really rude laugh and said, "Come on, Henry! We're going to miss the train!"

They left The Happy Heart; and the landlord, who had recovered breath, but not a fresh inspiration, during the interlude, took up the tale again.

They left The Happy Heart, and the landlord, who had caught his breath but not gained any new ideas during the break, continued the story.

Outside, the odd-job man, whose face was flushed, swore. "I wish they were men!" he said vindictively: "if they were, I'd teach 'em a lesson in manners. By jove! I'd like to get even with——"

Outside, the handyman, whose face was red, cursed. "I wish they were men!" he said angrily. "If they were, I'd show them some manners. Damn it! I'd love to get back at——"

"Do not worry," said Mizzi soothingly. "After all, I am a young woman. Mesdames would give their ears to be the same."

"Don't worry," Mizzi said reassuringly. "After all, I am a young woman. Ladies would give anything to be in my position."

Henry stopped dead, an idea having come upon him. With a growing light in his eye he surveyed the motor-car and the chauffeur, who in turn surveyed Mizzi with a gathering admiration. He even threw away the cigarette.

Henry stopped in his tracks, an idea hitting him. With a spark of excitement in his eye, he looked over the car and the chauffeur, who was also eyeing Mizzi with increasing admiration. He even tossed aside his cigarette.

"I say," said Henry, "this isn't a private car?"

"I say," Henry said, "this isn't a private car, is it?"

"No," said the chauffeur, glad of a chance further to admire this enchanting damsel. "General Motor-Car Company. Druv the ole gal down from London s'morning. Made me crawl, too."

"No," said the chauffeur, happy for a chance to admire this captivating young woman. "General Motor-Car Company. Drove the old girl down from London this morning. Made me take it slow, too."

"Driving her back?"

"Giving her a ride?"

The chauffeur suppressed an instinct to spit disgustedly and said, "Yes, wuss luck." Mizzi observed them, wondering.

The driver held back the urge to spit in disgust and said, "Yeah, tough luck." Mizzi watched them, feeling curious.

"What would you take," said Henry, breathing hard, "to drive us back instead?"

"What would it take," Henry said, breathing heavily, "to send us back instead?"

The chauffeur shook his head.

The driver shook his head.

"I'd lose my job."

"I'd get fired."

"Five pounds?" hinted Henry.

"Five bucks?" hinted Henry.

"A job's a job."

"Work is work."

"I'll find you another."

"I'll find you one more."

"Garn!"

"Gosh!"

"Straight! I'm Henry Brown, taxicab proprietor, Bloomsbury. Is that good enough?"

"Straight! I'm Henry Brown, cab owner in Bloomsbury. Is that good enough?"

"And a fiver?" stipulated the chauffeur, avaricious but cautious.

"And five bucks?" asked the chauffeur, greedy but careful.

"Here you are," said Henry, diving into his pocket. A note changed hands, and the chauffeur assumed a bland demeanor. "Jump in!" he said concisely; "it's a bet!"

"Here you go," said Henry, reaching into his pocket. A note passed between them, and the chauffeur put on a neutral expression. "Get in!" he said briefly; "it's a bet!"

"Oh, but——" objected Mizzi, hanging back.

"Oh, but——" Mizzi said, hesitating.

"Romance!" whispered Henry. "You said you liked it! Quick! Quick!"

"Romance!" whispered Henry. "You said you liked it! Hurry! Hurry!"

She jumped in, smiling happily.

She jumped in, smiling.

"You are a dear!"

"You're so sweet!"

"And you're a darling!" he said, getting in beside her and shutting the door. "Now, William, give 'em the horn and then London!"

"And you’re such a sweetheart!" he said, getting in next to her and closing the door. "Now, William, honk the horn and then let’s head to London!"

Honk! Honk!

Honk! Honk!

"Once more!"

"One more time!"

Honk! Honk!

Beep! Beep!

Mrs. Hedderwick appeared fretfully at the porch. "Do not make that exasperating noise!" she commanded. And then—"What! what impertinence—what——!"

Mrs. Hedderwick appeared anxiously on the porch. "Don't make that annoying noise!" she ordered. And then—"What! what attitude—what——!"

"Higher up, William!" said Henry peacefully.

"Higher up, William!" Henry said calmly.

"Good-by, madam!" and he raised his hat. "There, my little foreigner; will that do?"

"Goodbye, ma'am!" and he tipped his hat. "There, my little foreigner; is that okay?"

"Oh, Harry dear!"

"Oh, Harry!"

And Harry dear had no time even to say "Good biz!"

And Harry dear didn’t even have time to say "Good luck!"


CHAPTER XXIV

CERTAINTY—AHA!

Let us go back a couple of hours and see what has been engaging Miss Arkwright and Lionel since their interview with Tony. They are still reclining in the hammock-chair, which they have been obliged to move, more than once, retreating before the all-conquering sun. They have talked for a space, but nothing of their conversation is worthy of a recorder's pen, and at last they have fallen silent, each occupied with busy musings. Lionel, of course, has had plenty to think about since the early telegram—new schemes to mature, fresh hopes to be weighed, old difficulties to brush aside or evade. Winifred's silence, too, is not extraordinary. Apart from her secret history—and she must have a secret, to be sure, if not a dozen—there is matter for consideration in her present milieu. Putting aside the trivial incident of the five-days'-old attack (and an intriguer can not spend much time on trifles, especially when they end happily), there is the problem of Tony to be pondered over. But, at the worst, he can only be looked on as a light-hearted dilettante, whose greatest misfortune is the curse of wealth. Such, at least, is Winifred's shrewd guess, and we know how near the mark the arrow has fallen. Then, Lionel ... what shall she do with him? Is it better to keep him with her longer, a cheerful gentleman who seems quite content to waste his time in her company, despite the chilling fact that he appears equally content to chaff their prisoner if she is busy in the house? Or shall she send him away?

Let’s go back a couple of hours and see what Miss Arkwright and Lionel have been up to since their chat with Tony. They’re still lounging in the hammock-chair, which they’ve had to move several times to escape the overpowering sun. They’ve talked for a while, but nothing they discussed is worth writing down, and eventually, they’ve fallen silent, each lost in their own thoughts. Lionel, of course, has had plenty on his mind since the early telegram—new plans to develop, fresh hopes to evaluate, old problems to push aside or avoid. Winifred’s silence isn’t unusual either. Beyond her hidden history—and she must have at least one secret, if not more—there’s plenty for her to consider in her current situation. Ignoring the trivial matter of the five-day-old incident (and someone involved in intrigue can’t focus too much on small things, especially when they end well), there’s the issue of Tony to think about. But at worst, he can only be seen as a carefree dabbler whose biggest misfortune is being wealthy. That’s Winifred’s sharp assessment, and we know how accurate her judgment is. Then, there’s Lionel... what should she do with him? Is it better to keep him around longer, a cheerful guy who seems happy to spend time with her, despite the uncomfortable fact that he also seems just as happy to tease their captive if she’s busy inside? Or should she send him away?

Winifred stole a glance at Lionel, pondering with knit brows, and permitted herself a smile that was unseen by him. Was she thinking of his pursuit in the garden, the hurled water-jug, or the exposure of Mizzi? Perhaps the latter; for the smile was followed by a delectable frown that did not mar the poetry of her face. It seemed, indeed, to act but as a foil, enhancing the smile that followed again like a victor,—a victor that has retreated, only to return.

Winifred glanced at Lionel, her brows furrowed in thought, and allowed herself a smile that he didn’t notice. Was she reflecting on his chase in the garden, the thrown water jug, or Mizzi being exposed? Maybe it was the last one; the smile was soon matched by a delightful frown that didn’t spoil her beauty. In fact, it seemed to highlight the smile that came back again, like a champion returning after a setback.

As she wondered and smiled, Forbes came across the lawn and handed the morning's letters on a tray. The post had just come in.

As she looked on with curiosity and smiled, Forbes walked across the lawn and handed her the morning's letters on a tray. The mail had just arrived.

"Three for me," said Winifred, picking up the letters. "And one for you."

"Three for me," Winifred said, picking up the letters. "And one for you."

Lionel took it with a lazy gratitude. What had letters to do with him this heavenly morning, when he had had a wire to say that his mistress was free? How much better to pursue the current of his thoughts and try to make up his mind, once and for all, whether he loved Beatrice enough to ask her to marry him! Without glancing at the postmark or handwriting he murmured, "Excuse me!" and tore open the flap. The first few sentences made him sit bolt upright in his chair. "Good heavens!" he murmured, reading hastily on. His face grew dark, and the jaw set ominously the more he read. Winifred, watching him with a stealthy interest, had not yet opened her budget.

Lionel accepted it with a laid-back gratitude. What did letters matter to him on this beautiful morning, especially after receiving a message that his lover was free? It was much better to follow his thoughts and decide, once and for all, whether he loved Beatrice enough to propose to her! Without looking at the postmark or the handwriting, he said, "Excuse me!" and ripped open the envelope. The first few sentences made him sit up straight in his chair. "Oh my goodness!" he exclaimed, quickly reading on. His face darkened, and his jaw tightened ominously the more he read. Winifred, watching him with keen interest, had not yet opened her own letters.

"I hope it is no bad news?" she said with a soft sympathy.

"I hope it's not bad news?" she said with gentle concern.

"The worst," said Lionel with a grim absence, not looking up. Presently his face cleared and he smiled. "That is," he corrected himself, with a hasty glance at her, "I mean the best. Yes, certainly the best."

"The worst," said Lionel with a bleak expression, not looking up. After a moment, his face brightened and he smiled. "That is," he corrected himself with a quick glance at her, "I mean the best. Yes, definitely the best."

Winifred bit her lip and looked away with a puzzled discontent. What did he mean? The worst and the best ... strong words for a man of his age to use. The "worst" and the "best" should only be applied to strong emotions, such as are caused by love, money, or honor. Which of these potent stimulants was at work?

Winifred bit her lip and looked away, feeling confused and unsatisfied. What did he mean? The worst and the best... those are heavy words for a man his age to use. The "worst" and the "best" should only relate to intense emotions, like those triggered by love, money, or honor. Which of these powerful influences was at play?

"I am going in," she said suddenly. "Please don't get up. If I can be of any help in any way, you must let me know. But I ... I am glad your news is 'the best.'"

"I’m coming in," she said suddenly. "Please don’t get up. If I can help in any way, just let me know. But I ... I’m really glad your news is 'the best.'"

She went into the house, leaving Lionel to his letter. This was it.

She went into the house, leaving Lionel with his letter. This was it.

"Bloomsbury, London.

"My Dear Friend,—The cable announcing Lukos' death came to-night at seven. As soon as I had recovered from the shock I wired the news to you, but I do not expect that the telegram will be delivered till to-morrow morning. And now, at half past eight, I am sitting down to write very hurriedly, to tell you of my plans.

"I mean to go straight to Constantinople within two days. Why? To make sure, in the first instance—to find out for myself if he is really dead, and if it was 'measles' or something worse. I feel that the news must be true, but I must make certain. If it is true, then perhaps I can do something by way of revenge. You, I hope, will still befriend me by trying to regain the stolen papers. They may be of use to England yet. If not to England, then to me—a woman who has lost her husband. This is no time to assess my love for him, but I owe something at least to his memory, and the debt shall be paid.

"I must see you before leaving, and I hope to come down to Shereling to-morrow. Please tell my sister. You know our differences, but I am sure she will sympathize and help me. Yes; I am sure. I believe now that I was wrong in suspecting her—my information was untrustworthy, but I had every excuse. In haste.—Your friend,

"Beatrice Blair."

"Bloomsbury, London.

"My Dear Friend,—The news about Lukos' death came in tonight at seven. After I got over the shock, I sent you a message with the details, but I don’t think it will be delivered until tomorrow morning. Now, at half past eight, I'm quickly writing to keep you updated on my plans."

"I plan to go straight to Constantinople in the next two days. Why? To see for myself if he’s really dead and whether it was 'measles' or something worse. I suspect the news is true, but I need to confirm it. If it is true, then maybe I can do something about it in terms of revenge. I hope you'll still support me by trying to recover the stolen papers. They might still be important to England. If not to England, then to me—a woman who has lost her husband. This isn’t the moment to dwell on my love for him, but I owe something to his memory, and I will settle that debt."

"I need to see you before I leave, and I hope to come to Shereling tomorrow. Please let my sister know. You’re aware of our issues, but I’m sure she will understand and support me. Yes, I’m confident. I realize now that I was wrong to doubt her—my source of information wasn’t trustworthy, but I had my reasons. I’m in a hurry.—Your friend,

"Beatrice Blair."

Lionel's heart leaped as he read a second and a third time the words of comfort. At the first casual glance he could only understand that Beatrice was going out of his life, perhaps forever, and he plumbed depths hitherto undreamed of. But after the blow came the reaction and a saner grasp of the true importance of her news. He was on fire, yet coldly logical. The white heat of his heart and brain told him that here at last was hope realized, the goal reached, the attainment of certainty. The knowledge that he could not bear to lose her told him that he loved, and that his love was worthy of a declaration. He breathed a prayer of thankfulness.

Lionel's heart raced as he read the comforting words a second and third time. At first glance, he could only understand that Beatrice was leaving his life, maybe for good, and it hit him harder than he expected. But after the shock wore off, he gained a clearer grasp of what her news really meant. He was filled with passion, yet remained cool-headed. The intensity of his feelings made him realize that this was finally hope fulfilled, the goal achieved, the certainty he yearned for. The realization that he couldn't bear to lose her confirmed his love, and that his love deserved to be expressed. He silently thanked the universe.

Doubt of a prosaic nature was swift to follow. He loved her and must ask her to marry him. Yet, how could he ask her? He had not a penny in the world save what she had given him as her paid employee. How could he ask her to wed and coolly propose to live on her income? Lionel made short work of that. "I know," he said to himself, thinking swiftly but with honest logic, "that I am not mercenary. I would marry her in rags if she'd have me. As she happens to have money, so much the better. If by good luck she loves or learns to love me, she will not think me mercenary. Why should a pair of lovers wait when the only obstacle is a convention?—a convention good enough in itself (a proper discouragement of the ordinary place-hunter and hypocrite)—but a convention none the less. The exception shall prove the rule, for neither she nor I could be accused of conventionality."

Doubt of a practical nature quickly set in. He loved her and had to ask her to marry him. But how could he do that? He didn’t have a dime to his name except for what she had paid him as her employee. How could he ask her to marry him and casually suggest living off her income? Lionel quickly dismissed that thought. "I know," he told himself, thinking quickly yet logically, "that I’m not greedy. I would marry her in shabby clothes if she’d accept me. Since she happens to have money, that’s a bonus. If by some chance she loves me or comes to love me, she won’t see me as greedy. Why should a couple in love wait when the only thing holding them back is a convention?—a convention that serves its purpose (to discourage typical gold diggers and fakes)—but still just a convention. The exception will prove the rule, for neither she nor I can be labeled as conventional."

He laughed aloud. Still, there was a kind of discomfort in the laugh, for the conventions of a thousand years or more can not be laughed away in a moment, be the iconoclast never so hardy. In spite of his honesty and brave words, Lionel, in the dim recesses of consciousness, knew that he wished he could have said, "My dear, I love you and can afford to pay for a home!" He knew that from the idealist's standpoint he was right, but the purest cups of nectar may reveal an acid in the lees. Still, he drank his nectar and was very glad.

He laughed out loud. Still, there was a certain discomfort in his laugh, because the traditions of a thousand years can’t just be dismissed in an instant, no matter how bold the rebel. Despite his honesty and courageous words, Lionel, in the back of his mind, knew he wished he could say, "My dear, I love you and can afford to provide a home!" He understood that from an idealistic perspective he was right, but even the sweetest drinks can have a bitter residue at the bottom. Still, he enjoyed his drink and felt really happy.

Presently his face grew graver. "I must wait though," he reflected. "One can't propose the moment one hears she is a widow—too indecent. Besides, she may not love me.... I must give her time.... At least, though, I'll go with her to Constantinople. If she won't think of me as a husband or lover, by jove! I'll be her dragoman! She mustn't go there alone.... And now, let's break the news to Winifred."

Presently, his expression became more serious. "I need to wait," he thought. "You can't propose right after finding out she's a widow—it's just not appropriate. Besides, she might not love me.... I need to give her some time.... At least, I'll go with her to Constantinople. If she doesn't see me as a husband or a boyfriend, then fine! I'll be her guide! She shouldn't go there alone.... And now, let's tell Winifred."

He found Miss Arkwright in the library and told her of her sister's intention to come down to The Quiet House. To his disgust she began to make difficulties.

He found Miss Arkwright in the library and informed her about her sister's plan to come to The Quiet House. To his annoyance, she started to create problems.

"You know, Mr. Mortimer, that we do not agree on her choice of a career——"

"You know, Mr. Mortimer, that we don’t see eye to eye on her choice of career——"

"Yes, yes," he said impatiently. "I know all that. But this is a serious business. She is going to Turkey in a day or two, and wishes to see me before leaving. Surely——"

"Yeah, yeah," he said impatiently. "I get all that. But this is serious. She’s heading to Turkey in a day or two and wants to see me before she leaves. Surely——"

"She does me the honor of suspecting me of conspiracy," returned Miss Arkwright slowly, but with a resentful gleam. "I have told you that she is mistaken. Why should a conspirator lend her hospitality?"

"She is doing me the honor of suspecting me of plotting," Miss Arkwright replied slowly, but with a resentful glint in her eye. "I've already told you that she's wrong. Why would someone who's plotting offer their hospitality?"

"She acknowledges her error," said Lionel. "You must forgive much to a woman who has suffered so cruelly as she."

"She admits she was wrong," said Lionel. "You have to forgive a woman who has endured such terrible pain."

"I will not," said Winifred deliberately. "I have not said much to you on the subject, but now I will not conceal from you that I have been deeply wounded."

"I won't," Winifred said firmly. "I haven't said much to you about this, but now I won't hide from you that I've been really hurt."

"Are you not great enough to forgive?" he urged, fair play telling him that she had a right to feel indignation—if she were innocent! He tried in vain to find a melting in her eye.

"Are you not big enough to forgive?" he urged, fairness telling him that she had a right to be angry—if she was innocent! He tried unsuccessfully to see any warmth in her eyes.

"No," said Winifred, still very deliberately and coldly. "I am a woman, and can not forgive her lack of trust as yet. I will yield so far as to allow her to come here and see you, as she is going abroad, but I will not see her myself."

"No," Winifred said, still very deliberately and coldly. "I’m a woman and I can't forgive her for not trusting me yet. I’ll go as far as to let her come here and see you since she’s going abroad, but I won't see her myself."

"Your sister?" he suggested, still hoping.

"Your sister?" he proposed, still holding on to hope.

"No," repeated Winifred. "On that I am immovable. Be content and—leave me!"

"No," Winifred said again. "I won't change my mind about that. Just be satisfied and—leave me!"

Her voice trembled over the concluding words, and the next moment she buried her face in her hands, leaning forward over the table. There were no sobs—no tears escaping from that indomitable lady, but her attitude was eloquent of tragedy. Lionel was not so foolish as to attempt consolation. He left the room, hoping to soften her before Beatrice came down.

Her voice shook as she finished speaking, and the next moment she put her face in her hands, leaning over the table. There were no sobs—no tears from that strong woman, but her posture spoke volumes of sadness. Lionel was smart enough not to try to comfort her. He left the room, hoping to calm her down before Beatrice came downstairs.

The morning dragged wearily, but at last the luncheon-gong sounded, and Lionel went to the dining-room. Winifred joined him at the meal, but neither had much to say. Lionel, though understanding her resentment, could not excuse it, and his attitude in consequence was chilly. Winifred, reading his condemnation, made no effort further to justify herself, and both were glad when the meal came to an end. Before leaving the room she said, "If you prefer to see my sister in the house, the library will be at your disposal."

The morning dragged on, but finally the lunch bell rang, and Lionel headed to the dining room. Winifred joined him for the meal, but neither had much to say. Lionel, while understanding her anger, couldn’t overlook it, so he was distant. Winifred, aware of his judgment, didn’t bother to defend herself further, and they were both relieved when the meal wrapped up. Before leaving the room, she said, "If you'd rather see my sister in the house, the library will be available for you."

"I prefer the garden," he replied stiffly, and he thought he caught a smile.

"I prefer the garden," he replied awkwardly, and he thought he saw a smile.

"Suppose it rains?"

"What if it rains?"

"There is The Happy Heart."

"There’s The Happy Heart."

"But your promise still holds," she reminded him.

"But your promise still stands," she reminded him.

"If Miss Blair prefers the inn," said Lionel with polite determination, "we go there. That, of course, will cancel the promise, and you will not see me again. In case she does," he added more softly, "I had better say good-by now. Thank you for many kindnesses."

"If Miss Blair prefers the inn," said Lionel with polite determination, "we're going there. That, of course, means I won't be keeping my promise, and you won't see me again. In case she does," he added more gently, "I should say goodbye now. Thanks for all your kindness."

"There is nothing to thank me for," she replied, looking confused.

"There’s no need to thank me," she said, looking puzzled.

"There is. And I wish you would give me one thing more for which to thank you," said Lionel, taking her hand. Her eyes dropped. She blushed, but did not free herself.

"There is. And I wish you would give me one more thing to thank you for," said Lionel, taking her hand. She looked down. She blushed, but didn’t pull away.

"And that is——?" she murmured.

"And that is—?" she whispered.

"It would be a great happiness to see you and your sister reconciled."

"It would be wonderful to see you and your sister back on good terms."

She wrenched her hand away.

She pulled her hand back.

"Do not ask me that again," she replied, seeming both disappointed and pettish. "I have given you my answer already. Now, please, will you be kind enough to tell the prisoner I wish to see him. He can stop work and change. I will wait for him in my sitting-room up-stairs."

"Don't ask me that again," she said, sounding both disappointed and sulky. "I've already given you my answer. Now, could you please let the prisoner know that I want to see him? He can stop working and change. I'll wait for him in my sitting room upstairs."

Lionel went in search of Tony. He found the latter pocketing his pipe, preparatory to a fresh attack upon the mound of earth. "Miss Arkwright says you can stop," said Lionel genially. "You may go and get clean; she wishes to see you."

Lionel went looking for Tony. He found him putting away his pipe, getting ready for another go at the mound of dirt. "Miss Arkwright says you can take a break," Lionel said kindly. "You can go get cleaned up; she wants to see you."

"What about my work?" objected Tony. "You know, old friend—forgive me, but I seem to have known you for years—I am making quite a good job of that bed. Exegi monumentum ære perennius! What? That's about all I have left of a thousand-pound education. What I mean to say is that future generations may come and look at my flower bed as being the beau-ideal—the standard—the Super-bed, and so forth. Honestly, I'm beginning to be quite proud of the little chap—it's a most promising child. I say, between old schoolmates and that sort of jolly palaver, what does she want me for?"

"What about my work?" Tony protested. "You know, old friend—sorry, but I feel like I've known you forever—I’m really doing a great job on that flower bed. Exegi monumentum ære perennius! What? That's basically all I have left from my pricey education. What I'm trying to say is that future generations might come and see my flower bed as the perfect example—the standard—the Super-bed, and so on. Honestly, I'm starting to feel pretty proud of it—it's a really promising little project. I mean, between old schoolmates and that kind of fun chat, what does she want from me?"

"Haven't a notion, friend of my youth," said Lionel sympathetically. Knowing nothing of Tony, he felt nevertheless an attraction and a mutual bond. "You'd better do as she tells you."

"Haven't a clue, old friend," Lionel said with sympathy. Even though he knew nothing about Tony, he still felt a connection and bond between them. "You should probably listen to her."

The bed-builder arose.

The bed-maker got up.

"Of course. I say, do you think she'll let me stay here for a bit longer? What I mean is, has she any intention of carting me at once?"

"Sure. I mean, do you think she’ll let me stick around here for a little while longer? What I’m asking is, does she plan to send me away right away?"

"I haven't a notion."

"I have no idea."

"You see ... here's the bed ... some one must finish it. I should hate to think of another artist putting in his oar. The bed, in short, worries me."

"You see ... here’s the bed ... someone has to finish it. I really wouldn’t want another artist to get involved. The bed, to be honest, is bothering me."

"Ask her to take you on as gardener," suggested Lionel, smiling at the absurd creature.

"Ask her to hire you as a gardener," suggested Lionel, smiling at the ridiculous person.

"I wonder...." Tony moved off with dragging dissatisfied steps. After progressing a few yards he turned. There was hesitation in his voice and manner.

"I wonder...." Tony walked away with slow, unhappy steps. After going a few yards, he turned around. There was uncertainty in his voice and actions.

"I—I say, oh, companion of my infancy, I wonder if you'd mind me asking you a question? Of course, we've not been introduced and all that, and I hope you'll not regard it as a liberty, faux pas, double entendre, or what-not. But do you mind telling me if you're engaged to her?"

"I—I mean, oh, my childhood friend, I’m curious if I could ask you something? I know we haven’t been introduced and all that, and I hope you won’t see it as too forward, awkward, or anything like that. But would you mind telling me if you’re dating her?"

"Lord, no!" said Lionel, mightily surprised. "Not the least intention of trying. If that's all your trouble, go in and win. And good luck to you!"

"Lord, no!" Lionel exclaimed, completely taken aback. "I have no intention of trying. If that’s all that’s bothering you, just go in there and win. Good luck!"

"I say," observed Tony with a most engaging smile, "you're a blind ass, old yoke fellow of my youth; but you're no end of a sportsman. One more question—I promise that I'm quite a decent chap, though appearances are against me—is she engaged to any one else?"

"I say," Tony remarked with a charming smile, "you're a clueless old buddy from my younger days; but you're quite the sportsman. Just one more question—I promise I'm a decent guy, even if I don't look it—is she seeing anyone else?"

"Not that I know of."

"Not that I'm aware of."

"The planet Jupiter is in conjunction with Saturn, or words to that effect. Whatever the stars are, I seem to be in luck. Oh, of course she mayn't look at me, I know. We must give her time to appreciate my many excellences—not dream of rushing things. But she has made my few days' stay so pleasant, that common gratitude——"

"The planet Jupiter is aligned with Saturn, or something like that. Whatever the stars are saying, I feel lucky. Oh, of course, she might not notice me, I get that. We need to give her time to see how great I am—not rush anything. But she's made my short stay so nice that basic gratitude——"

"No: don't spoil it!" said Lionel, reading something beneath Tony's idle chatter; "you don't mean that." Tony looked at him and changed his tone.

"No way, don't ruin it!" said Lionel, picking up on something behind Tony's casual talk; "you can't be serious." Tony glanced at him and switched his tone.

"What I do mean," he said sincerely, "is that she's a perfectly top-hole creature. She's taught me a few things—not excluding work, in which she must share the credit with others—during the last few days. I want to extend the lessons. Well, I think a little soap and water might be rather a promising start. Where am I to see her? Up-stairs?"

"What I really mean," he said earnestly, "is that she's an absolutely amazing person. She's taught me a few things—not to mention work, which she shares credit for with others—over the past few days. I want to build on what I've learned. Well, I think a little soap and water could be a good starting point. Where can I find her? Upstairs?"

He strolled off whistling cheerfully, bearing Lionel's good wishes. The latter was in a good humor with all the world to-day: he felt like giving a sovereign to every child, and a five-pound note to every grown-up. "If ever I make a hit with my plays," he thought, "I'll give the vicar a peal of bells and Mrs. Peters—what on earth could I give to Mrs. Peters? I suppose a calf-bound set of her husband's sermons would be the most acceptable souvenir, unless she's human enough to enjoy diamonds. Yes, I think it might be diamonds." He smiled at his happy visions, and walked back to the hammock-chair to wait till Beatrice should appear.

He walked away whistling happily, carrying Lionel's good wishes. Lionel was in a great mood today; he felt like giving a pound coin to every child and a five-pound note to every adult. "If I ever succeed with my plays," he thought, "I'll give the vicar a set of bells and Mrs. Peters—what on earth could I give to Mrs. Peters? I guess a fancy bound collection of her husband's sermons would be the most appreciated gift, unless she's the kind of person who would prefer diamonds. Yeah, I think it might be diamonds." He smiled at his joyful thoughts and walked back to the hammock chair to wait for Beatrice to show up.

He did not know, of course, whether she was coming by rail or motor, and therefore did not trouble to look out possible trains. He was quite content to wait patiently for her in that delightful garden, knowing now that he loved her, and hoping she might love, or learn to love him. But though he was content and patient, he could not distract himself, or spend the lagging hours with books or newspapers. He tried, indeed, but failed. After reading a few lines he found his attention wandering: he could not compel his brain to follow the paltry adventures of Mudie's heroines, or the stupendous feats chronicled in the daily press. Instead, his thoughts flew back to that lucky rescue in the Strand, to the wondrous hours with Beatrice in the theater or in the Bloomsbury flat, to the mad adventure of the magnanimous churchwarden, to the thousand incidents of the past adventurous month. He could not read, but tobacco was no hindrance to the brave play of memory and imagination, and with a luxurious smile he lighted a pipe and drowsed. Presently, between the nicotian clouds, he thought, "I must make Winifred be friends. What scheme shall I try? Winifred is a dear, too, though she has a woman's resentment. What can I do to make them all happy—to make every one happy? Winifred ... Beatrice...."

He didn’t know, of course, whether she was coming by train or car, so he didn’t bother to check for any trains. He was quite content to wait patiently for her in that lovely garden, now aware that he loved her and hoping she might love him back, or at least come to love him. But even though he was calm and patient, he couldn’t distract himself or pass the slow hours with books or newspapers. He tried, but it didn’t work. After reading a few lines, he found his mind wandering; he couldn’t force himself to focus on the trivial adventures of the heroines in the novels or the impressive events reported in the daily news. Instead, his thoughts drifted back to that fortunate rescue in the Strand, to the wonderful times with Beatrice at the theater or in the Bloomsbury flat, to the crazy adventure with the generous churchwarden, to the countless incidents of the past thrilling month. He couldn’t read, but smoking didn’t interfere with the vibrant play of memory and imagination, and with a relaxed smile, he lit a pipe and dozed off. Eventually, through the nicotine clouds, he thought, “I need to help Winifred make friends. What plan should I come up with? Winifred is sweet too, even though she has a woman’s grudges. What can I do to make everyone happy? Winifred... Beatrice...”

The besotted lover, overcome with his soul's reaction, the June sun and a crowded morning, fell asleep....

The infatuated lover, overwhelmed by his feelings, the June sun, and a busy morning, fell asleep....

He was roused by a touch upon the shoulder. He awoke and blinked lazily toward heaven. Beside him stood an angel in a lavender linen frock, and a lavender hat with a daring touch of black, carrying a lavender parasol with a white handle. It was Beatrice at last!

He was stirred by a touch on his shoulder. He woke up and lazily blinked at the sky. Next to him stood an angel in a lavender linen dress and a lavender hat with a bold black accent, holding a lavender parasol with a white handle. It was Beatrice at last!


CHAPTER XXV

THE GOD OF THE MACHINE

Lionel stared dumbly for a moment, not completely realizing what had happened. Then he jumped up with a wry smile. "You must think me a poor watcher," he said, inwardly cursing his sleepiness. "I was so busy waiting and thinking of you that I suppose I must have—I imagine I have—that is, I fell asleep. Did you come by train?"

Lionel stared blankly for a moment, not fully processing what had just happened. Then he sprang up with a wry smile. "You must think I'm a terrible observer," he said, secretly cursing his drowsiness. "I was so caught up in waiting and thinking about you that I guess I must have—I think I did—that is, I fell asleep. Did you come by train?"

"Yes," she said. It would be idle to say "in the well-remembered tones." Her voice was identical with Winifred's: her appearance, gesture, carriage—all were Winifred's; but the telepathy of love told Lionel the myriad differences between the sisters, differences impalpable, impossible to define or even hint at, but differences that were real, if psychological. "I came by the four-thirty, and walked from the station."

"Yeah," she said. It would be pointless to say "in the familiar tones." Her voice was exactly like Winifred's: her looks, gestures, and manner—all were Winifred’s; but the connection of love made Lionel aware of the countless differences between the sisters, differences that were subtle, impossible to define or even suggest, but differences that were real, if psychological. "I took the four-thirty and walked from the station."

"Then—good heavens! what time is it?"

"Then—oh my gosh! What time is it?"

"Six o'clock," she said with a smile. "How long have you been asleep?"

"Six o'clock," she said with a smile. "How long have you been asleep?"

"It must be at least three hours," said Lionel in rueful amazement. "Fancy wasting three hours of a day like this in sleep! But don't let us waste any more. Tell me all about yourself, your plans, everything. You are well?" he added anxiously, though the question was needless.

"It has to be at least three hours," Lionel said, shaking his head in disbelief. "Can you believe wasting three hours of a day like this sleeping? But let's not waste any more time. Tell me everything about yourself, your plans, everything. You're doing well, right?" he added, concerned, even though the question was unnecessary.

"Perfectly. And you?"

"Great. And you?"

"Quite fit, thanks." And a silence fell between them. It seemed odd that there should be a silence, for so much had happened since they last met. Lionel had been living in a penny novelette, and her fate could not have been much more fortunate. Yet now they seemed to have nothing to say beyond the commonplaces of friendly acquaintanceship. It was Lionel who broke the silence.

"Pretty good, thanks." Then a silence settled between them. It felt strange that there was silence, considering everything that had happened since they last met. Lionel had been living in a cheap romance novel, and her situation couldn't have been much better. Yet now they seemed to have nothing to discuss beyond the usual small talk of casual friends. It was Lionel who finally spoke up.

"You must let me say that...." He stopped. He could not honestly say he was sorry for the death of Lukos, so he changed the form of his statement: "—that I am sorry for your trouble. You know it already, but I should like to tell it you.... I suppose it must be true?"

"You have to let me say that...." He paused. He couldn’t honestly say he was sorry for Lukos's death, so he rephrased his statement: "—that I'm sorry for your difficulty. You know it already, but I wanted to tell you.... I guess it must be true?"

"Thank you," Beatrice replied evenly. "Yes, I expect it is true; but, as I wrote to you, I am going to make sure."

"Thank you," Beatrice replied calmly. "Yes, I believe it's true; but, as I mentioned in my letter, I’m going to confirm it."

"Is that wise?"

"Is that smart?"

"Perhaps not, but I mean to go."

"Maybe not, but I'm definitely going."

Lionel did not attempt to argue with her, to reason or persuade. The finality of tone and his knowledge of the woman made him give up at once any thought of such a useless effort. "But I go with her," he resolved, "either as husband or servant. And if she won't take me, I'll go on my own if I have to steal a ride under the train!"

Lionel didn’t try to argue with her, reason with her, or persuade her. The certainty in her voice and what he knew about her made him immediately abandon any thought of that pointless effort. “But I’m going with her,” he decided, “either as her husband or as her servant. And if she won’t have me, I’ll go by myself if I have to sneak a ride under the train!”

"Did you call at the house?" he asked.

"Did you stop by the house?" he asked.

"I came straight across here, seeing you the moment I entered the gate. Perhaps I had better see my sister before we begin to talk. Our conversation may be long."

"I came straight over here and saw you as soon as I entered the gate. Maybe I should talk to my sister before we start. Our chat might take a while."

Lionel moved uneasily.

Lionel shifted nervously.

"I am sorry to say," he began, "that your sister feels anything but well-disposed toward you. She resents your suspicion, and ... and...." he stuck fast.

"I’m sorry to say," he started, "that your sister doesn’t feel positively about you at all. She resents your suspicion, and ... and...." he got stuck.

"Refuses to see me?" she suggested.

"Won't you see me?" she suggested.

He nodded. "I have hopes of winning her over yet, but...."

He nodded. "I still hope to win her over, but...."

"If she has said 'No' she will stick to it," said Beatrice, digging her parasol into the lawn. "She can be a darling, but she can also be pig-headed. What do you think of her?" she added quickly, turning upon him.

"If she said 'No', she's going to stand by it," Beatrice said, digging her parasol into the lawn. "She can be really sweet, but she can also be stubborn. What do you think of her?" she added quickly, turning to him.

"Charming," said Lionel. "Except for this unfortunate weakness. And there is some excuse even for that."

"Charming," Lionel said. "Except for this unfortunate flaw. And there is some justification for that."

"Do you consider her pretty?" It sounded an odd question, but oddities were lost on him now.

"Do you think she's pretty?" It seemed like a weird question, but he didn't care about weirdness anymore.

"Yes; very pretty."

"Yes, very pretty."

"As pretty as I?" asked Beatrice.

"As pretty as me?" asked Beatrice.

"Quite," he laughed, beginning to feel more at home, "but in a different way. And I prefer your way," he added with sincerity.

"Absolutely," he laughed, starting to feel more comfortable, "but in a different way. And I like your way better," he added honestly.

"That is a little crude," she smiled. "I expected a more delicate compliment from a man of your education. Please pay me one at once."

"That's a bit rough," she smiled. "I expected a more subtle compliment from someone with your education. Please give me one right now."

To be asked for a delicate compliment at a moment's notice must be much the same as if the Punch editor were asked for a joke instanter. You can imagine Mr. Seaman being introduced with, "This is Mr. Seaman—Punch, you know." "How charming! Please, Mr. Seaman, be good enough to be funny," and the resulting débâcle of Mr. Seaman. Lionel felt empty of all wit and ideas. He simply looked at her and shook his head.

Being asked for a thoughtful compliment on the spot has to feel a lot like expecting the Punch editor to come up with a joke right away. You can picture Mr. Seaman being introduced with, "This is Mr. Seaman—Punch, you know." "How lovely! Please, Mr. Seaman, could you be funny?" and then the embarrassing situation for Mr. Seaman. Lionel felt completely devoid of any cleverness or inspiration. He just looked at her and shook his head.

"I am sorry ... you have silenced me."

"I’m sorry ... you've silenced me."

She smiled provokingly. "Try!"

She smiled provocatively. "Go for it!"

He shook his head again with a sudden sadness. As he observed her, devotedly absorbing every detail of her dress, her charming attitude, her delicate color, the dainty foot in the lavender stocking and trim black shoe pushed seductively forward, the glorious hair, and brilliance of her eyes, the incarnation of youth and joy (and he excused her that, remember, for the compulsion of her marriage), he groaningly realized that his late logic would not hold. He loved her and wanted her: he knew that he would not be mercenary in asking, but he felt he could not after all. To think of asking for such a lovely creature, without a penny of his own—he could not do it. He was wrong, he told himself, and felt that his ideals were true, but it was impossible. His face grew grim as he looked at her. The smile faded from her lips.

He shook his head again, feeling a sudden wave of sadness. As he watched her, devotedly taking in every detail of her dress, her charming demeanor, her delicate complexion, the dainty foot in the lavender stocking and classy black shoe pushed playfully forward, the beautiful hair and the sparkle in her eyes, the embodiment of youth and joy (and he excused her for that, remembering the pressure of her marriage), he painfully acknowledged that his earlier reasoning wouldn’t hold up. He loved her and wanted her; he knew he wouldn’t be selfish in asking, but deep down, he felt he simply couldn't. The thought of asking for such a beautiful woman, without a dime to his name—he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He told himself he was wrong, and felt that his ideals were valid, but it felt impossible. His expression grew serious as he looked at her. The smile disappeared from her lips.

"What is it?" she said softly. "Is anything the matter, my ... friend?"

"What is it?" she said gently. "Is something wrong, my ... friend?"

He was near the breaking-point, and had that moment continued he might have told her all. But an interruption—a twentieth-century interruption—saved him.

He was close to his breaking point, and if that moment had gone on, he might have told her everything. But an interruption—a modern interruption—saved him.

From the deeps of the air was heard a dull humming. The noise increased every moment, and Beatrice looked perplexedly about her. "Do you hear it," she asked, "that curious noise?... Like a gigantic bee...."

From the depths of the air, a dull humming could be heard. The noise grew louder by the moment, and Beatrice looked around in confusion. "Do you hear that?" she asked, "that strange noise?... Like a huge bee...."

Lionel had heard a similar noise before and was not perplexed. "It must be an aeroplane," he said reassuringly: "it sounds as if it were quite close. Perhaps that clump of trees hides its approach."

Lionel had heard a similar noise before and wasn’t confused. "It must be a plane," he said with reassurance: "it sounds like it’s pretty close. Maybe that group of trees is blocking its path."

His surmise proved correct, for in a brief space the machine soared into view like some beautiful bird. "There it is!" they cried together, standing like two delighted children watching a kindly rock from the Arabian Nights. "Why! what is it going to do?" continued Beatrice, speaking as if the monoplane were a living creature. "See! it has changed its course ... it is circling round like a bird of prey."

His guess turned out to be right, because soon the machine appeared like a beautiful bird. "There it is!" they exclaimed together, standing like two excited kids watching a friendly rock from the Arabian Nights. "Wow! What’s it going to do?" Beatrice continued, speaking as if the monoplane were alive. "Look! It has changed direction... it's circling like a bird of prey."

"It looks as if he meant to land," said Lionel, "and was seeking for a suitable place. Yes, by jove! he's found it. Now watch!"

"It seems like he intended to land," said Lionel, "and was looking for a good spot. Yes, wow! He's found it. Now keep an eye on this!"

The air-man had shut off his engine, for the buzzing ceased, and he came down to earth, with a graceful swoop that enchanted Beatrice, on a bit of level pasture two fields away. "Come on!" cried Beatrice excitedly. "Let's go and have a look! I've never seen an aeroplane close to."

The pilot had turned off his engine, so the buzzing stopped, and he descended to the ground with a smooth glide that fascinated Beatrice, landing on a flat stretch of grass two fields away. "Come on!" Beatrice exclaimed with excitement. "Let's go check it out! I've never seen an airplane up close!"

Lionel smiled at her enthusiasm, and they set off at a brisk pace. Leaving the garden by the little wicket at the back, they crossed the tiny stream, dignified by the name of Shere, and walked on, chatting happily till they were close upon the air-man. They could see him walking round his machine, examining it with a parent's care, pulling here, patting there, testing the tension of a wire, inspecting the engine. Suddenly Beatrice stopped short. "Bother!" she said impatiently. "I've left my hanky in the garden. I wonder if you'd mind——"

Lionel smiled at her excitement, and they set off at a quick pace. Exiting the garden through the small gate at the back, they crossed the little stream, grandly called the Shere, and continued on, chatting happily until they were near the air-man. They could see him circling his machine, looking it over with the care of a parent, pulling here, patting there, checking the tension of a wire, inspecting the engine. Suddenly, Beatrice stopped abruptly. "Ugh!" she said in frustration. "I left my handkerchief in the garden. I wonder if you’d mind——"

"Of course," said Lionel, glad, you may be sure, of the lightest service. "You go on and learn to fly. I'll join you in five minutes."

"Of course," Lionel said, clearly happy to help. "You go ahead and learn to fly. I'll catch up with you in five minutes."

He left Beatrice and ran back to the garden. But in spite of the most careful search he could not see any trace of the handkerchief. He searched the lawn, the chairs, the drive, but no handkerchief was visible. "She must have lost it in the train," he thought, "or dropped it on the road. Well, that's soon remedied."

He left Beatrice and ran back to the garden. But despite his thorough search, he couldn’t find any sign of the handkerchief. He looked on the lawn, the chairs, and the driveway, but there was no handkerchief in sight. "She must have dropped it on the train," he thought, "or left it on the road. Well, that's an easy fix."

Going into the house, he rang the dining-room bell. It was answered by Forbes. "Get me a clean handkerchief, please," said Lionel. To his utter amazement Forbes said "Yes, sir," and prepared to leave the room.

Going into the house, he rang the dining-room bell. It was answered by Forbes. "Please get me a clean handkerchief," said Lionel. To his complete surprise, Forbes said "Yes, sir," and got ready to leave the room.

"Hi!" said Lionel, and Forbes stopped, flushing a dull red. Lionel pulled himself together with an effort. "Excuse me, Forbes," said he, striving to speak calmly: "I understood you were dumb. Has the age of miracles revived, or what?"

"Hey!" said Lionel, and Forbes paused, turning a dull red. Lionel focused himself with some effort. "Sorry, Forbes," he said, trying to sound calm. "I thought you were mute. Have miracles made a comeback, or what?"

Forbes bowed discreetly.

Forbes nodded quietly.

"Our local doctor is a very clever surgeon, sir," he replied blandly. "I think you said a handkerchief, sir?"

"Our local doctor is a really skilled surgeon, sir," he replied flatly. "I believe you mentioned a handkerchief, sir?"

He disappeared....

He vanished....

"Cleverness, Forbes," said Lionel when the footman returned, "is not confined to doctors. I congratulate you ... on the recovery of speech."

"Cleverness, Forbes," Lionel said when the footman came back, "isn't just limited to doctors. I congratulate you ... on getting your speech back."

"Thank you, sir," said Forbes with a well-bred humility. "I find it a great blessing, I own. It opens out a new world."

"Thank you, sir," Forbes said with genuine humility. "I genuinely consider it a great blessing. It opens up a whole new world."

He held the door, and Lionel passed out, his brain sagging heavily. A few minutes later he rejoined Beatrice, who had more surprises in store. She was chatting merrily with the air-man as he came up.

He held the door, and Lionel stepped out, his mind feeling sluggish. A few minutes later he rejoined Beatrice, who had more surprises waiting for him. She was happily chatting with the pilot as he approached.

"This is great luck!" she said cheerfully to the astonished Lionel. "Here's an old friend of mine dropped from the skies—yes! literally!—to pay a friendly call. Let me introduce you: Mr. Mortimer—Mr. Ashford Billing, my late manager."

"This is amazing luck!" she said happily to the shocked Lionel. "Look, an old friend of mine has dropped in from nowhere—yes! literally!—to pay a friendly visit. Let me introduce you: Mr. Mortimer—Mr. Ashford Billing, my former manager."

"Very pleased to meet you, Mr. Billing," said Lionel mechanically. "I've heard your name before."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Billing," Lionel said flatly. "I've heard your name before."

"And I yours, Mr. Mortimer," replied Billing with genuine heartiness. "It's a real pleasure to meet a man who can write like you."

"And I yours, Mr. Mortimer," replied Billing with genuine warmth. "It's a true pleasure to meet someone who can write like you."

"I don't understand," said Lionel. "How can you know anything of my work? It's not attracted much notice yet."

"I don't get it," said Lionel. "How do you know anything about my work? It hasn't really gotten any attention yet."

Billing laughed.

Billing laughed.

"Shall I tell him?" he asked, turning to the lady.

"Should I tell him?" he asked, turning to the woman.

"Bags I!" said Beatrice, laughing: "that must be my royalty, or commission, if you prefer it. First of all, let me explain his presence. He called on me this afternoon and found that I was out——"

"Bags I!" Beatrice said, laughing. "That must be my royalty, or commission, if you prefer. First, let me explain why he's here. He came to see me this afternoon and discovered that I was out——"

"As usual," interrupted Billing.

"As usual," interrupted Billing.

"And learned where I had gone from my servant. Then, being in a hurry——"

"And found out where I had gone from my servant. Then, being in a hurry——"

"Wanted to try to persuade her to sign a new contract," said the irrepressible Billing, "but she won't. Perhaps you can make her realize, Mr. Mortimer, that if she retires the stage will lose one of its brightest jewels."

"Wanted to try to convince her to sign a new contract," said the unstoppable Billing, "but she won’t. Maybe you can make her understand, Mr. Mortimer, that if she leaves, the stage will lose one of its brightest stars."

"Oh, keep that for the publicity agent!" she begged. "I've told you I mean to retire, and that's final. I want to tell the news. Well, Mr. Mortimer, the impetuous man couldn't wait, so he went down to Brooklands and flew here——"

"Oh, save that for the PR person!" she pleaded. "I've told you I'm planning to retire, and that's that. I want to share the news. Well, Mr. Mortimer, the impulsive guy couldn't hold off, so he headed down to Brooklands and flew here——"

"Quicker than the train," smiled Billing. "American hustle and all that——"

"Faster than the train," smiled Billing. "American hustle and all that—"

"And now he tells me—as a casual item of information—that he's going to produce your play."

"And now he casually mentions that he's going to produce your play."

"What!" said Lionel.

"What?!" said Lionel.

"Yes—yes—yes! Isn't it splendid? Now, Ashford, you can tell the rest."

"Yes—yes—yes! Isn't it amazing? Now, Ashford, you can share the rest."

"Guess there isn't much left to tell," said Billing, still smiling. "Well, sir, Miss Blair told me about your play a month ago now. My reader reported favorably on it, and I read it myself. I think it will go, Mr. Mortimer, if I'm any judge; and when you get back to London we can fix up the contract. I hope it will mean something hot for both of us."

"Guess there's not much more to say," Billing said with a smile. "Well, sir, Miss Blair mentioned your play to me about a month ago. My reader gave it a good review, and I read it myself. I think it'll work, Mr. Mortimer, if I’m any judge; and when you get back to London, we can sort out the contract. I hope it leads to something great for both of us."

Lionel turned, incapable of speech, to Beatrice. He thanked her with his eyes, but more than thanks lay in them, and Billing noticed the mutual look with an inward groan. There was silence for a moment. Then Billing squared his shoulders, and in a matter-of-fact voice said, "Well, I calculate I must be getting home."

Lionel turned to Beatrice, unable to find the words. He expressed his gratitude with his eyes, but there was more than just thanks in that gaze, and Billing caught the shared look, feeling a pang of discomfort. There was a brief silence. Then Billing straightened up and, in a straightforward tone, said, "Well, I guess I should head home."

Beatrice protested. There was not the least hurry. There was no sense in this flying over to see them and only staying for ten minutes. He must stop and have dinner: why not sleep?...

Beatrice argued. There was no rush at all. It didn’t make sense to fly over to see them and only stay for ten minutes. He should stay for dinner: why not spend the night?

"You forget I don't know your sister," he replied with a peculiar smile. Beatrice blushed. Lionel did not notice the blush. He was too busy thinking of the new vistas that opened before him even to hear what they were saying. He despised the flying man, for did not he, Lionel, tread upon the air?

"You forget I don't know your sister," he replied with a strange smile. Beatrice blushed. Lionel didn’t notice her blush. He was too caught up in the new possibilities that lay ahead to even hear what they were saying. He couldn't stand the flying man, because wasn't he, Lionel, walking on air?

"I'll arrange that somehow," said Beatrice quickly. "Ashford, you really must stop. I want to talk to you."

"I'll figure that out somehow," Beatrice said quickly. "Ashford, you really need to stop. I want to talk to you."

"Excuse me," he said with a queer smile that was not of joy, "but I guess I know better than that." His voice sank. "My dear, I wish you luck!"

"Excuse me," he said with a strange smile that didn’t show happiness, "but I think I know better than that." His voice dropped. "My dear, I wish you the best!"

"Oh, Ashford, dear!" she whispered, "I'm so sorry ... I'm so sorry...."

"Oh, Ashford, dear!" she whispered, "I'm really sorry... I'm really sorry..."

"That's all right," he said more cheerfully. "Now, I'm really going, never to worry you again. Hello! what's this?"

"That's okay," he said with a brighter tone. "Now, I'm actually leaving, never to bother you again. Hey! What's this?"

His exclamation of surprise caused them to turn and look toward The Quiet House.

His shout of surprise made them turn and look at The Quiet House.

From the wicket-gate had issued the figure of a man running. He wore no hat, and though apparently elderly, was progressing at a very fair rate of speed. But he had not run more than twenty yards before another man came bursting from the gate.

From the small gate, a man came running out. He wasn’t wearing a hat, and even though he seemed older, he was moving at a pretty good pace. But he hadn’t run more than twenty yards before another man came rushing out of the gate.

"Why, it's the prisoner!" gasped Lionel, "and good heavens!—yes!" He turned swiftly to Beatrice. "It's the churchwarden! What on earth is he doing here?"

"Wow, it's the prisoner!" gasped Lionel, "and oh my god!—yes!" He quickly turned to Beatrice. "It's the churchwarden! What in the world is he doing here?"

"So it is," replied Beatrice without emotion. He wondered at her self-control. "They seem to be in a hurry."

"So it is," Beatrice replied flatly. He was amazed by her self-control. "They seem to be in a hurry."

Robert was evidently in a very great hurry, but Tony had the advantage in years and sprightliness. He caught his quarry in a very short space, and seized him by the shoulder. Then the pair of them stopped, Robert obviously unwilling, and began to talk with much gesticulation on both sides. The onlookers of course could hear nothing of what was said, but from the pantomime Tony appeared to be expostulating, advising, entreating. Mr. Hedderwick seemed to be in a condition of irate panic. As a matter of fact, Tony was remonstrating with his comrade-in-arms for his cowardice, and urging him, for the sake of himself and the sex, to make a stand for the rights of man. "If you give in now, after your many heroisms with me," said Tony warmly, "I shall be ashamed of my pupil and disown him. Come! though you have run, it's not too late for a recovery."

Robert was clearly in a huge rush, but Tony had the edge in age and energy. He caught up to him quickly and grabbed him by the shoulder. Then they both stopped, with Robert clearly reluctant, and started talking animatedly. The onlookers could hear nothing of their conversation, but from their gestures, it seemed like Tony was arguing, advising, and pleading. Mr. Hedderwick appeared to be in a state of angry panic. In reality, Tony was scolding his fellow fighter for being cowardly and urging him, for his own sake and for women, to stand up for men’s rights. "If you give in now, after all your bravery with me," Tony said earnestly, "I’ll be ashamed of you as my student and disown you. Come on! Even though you’ve run, it’s not too late to turn things around."

"You don't know my wife!" panted Robert.

"You don't know my wife!" Robert gasped.

"I do—I've spoken to her for three minutes, and I can guess what she's like. I know something about women, and I feel sure that if you stand up to her now you'll be boss in your house for good. If not, she will. It's now or never."

"I do—I've talked to her for three minutes, and I can figure out what she's like. I know a thing or two about women, and I'm confident that if you stand up to her now, you'll be in charge of your house for good. If not, she will be. It's now or never."

"You—you're not joking, Mr. Wild?" said Robert piteously.

"You—you're not kidding, Mr. Wild?" said Robert sadly.

"I'm really serious. Now, come along with me and talk to these people. We'll let your wife catch us here. An audience ought to give you courage. Mind!" he added, holding Robert by the arm as they began to walk toward the aeroplane, "there must be no weakening, however terrible she may appear. Be a man, and you'll triumph!"

"I'm really serious. Now, come with me and talk to these people. We'll let your wife find us here. Having an audience should give you some courage. Just remember," he said, grabbing Robert by the arm as they started walking toward the airplane, "you can't let yourself falter, no matter how scary she seems. Be strong, and you'll succeed!"

It was all very well to urge him to be a man, but Mr. Hedderwick had been through a very tense six hours. When he escaped from the vicarage he rushed straight for The Happy Heart. There he instructed Mr. Glew in a sentence of some five hundred words, without so much as a comma intervening, that he meant to retire to his room at once, that he was to be denied to all callers, that casual inquirers were to be told that he had gone to the station, that on no account must any one be allowed to come up-stairs, and that information was to be given when the coast was clear. "I'll explainitalllaterglewwhenihavetimebutrememberthatit's afiverinyourpocketifIcomethroughto-daysafe," he babbled, dashing furiously up-stairs. "Right, sir," responded Glew, a creature to whom the word "fiver" was all that was necessary by way of present explanation. Robert's bedroom door slammed and was locked behind him long before the "Right, sir" had died away.

It was easy to tell him to man up, but Mr. Hedderwick had just gone through a very stressful six hours. When he finally got out of the vicarage, he rushed straight to The Happy Heart. There, he gave Mr. Glew a lengthy instruction that lasted about five hundred words, without a single pause, saying that he was going to his room right away, he was to be off-limits to all visitors, that any casual inquiries should be answered by saying he had gone to the station, that absolutely no one was to be allowed upstairs, and that information could only be given when it was safe. "I'll explain it all later, Glew, when I have time, but remember, it’s a fiver in your pocket if I come through today safe," he babbled, racing furiously upstairs. "Right, sir," replied Glew, a guy who just needed to hear “fiver” to know what was expected of him. Robert’s bedroom door slammed shut and locked long before the “Right, sir” had even faded away.

The visit of Mrs. Hedderwick and the vicar's wife made matters fairly clear to the landlord; but, true to his salt and interest, he persisted in the tale that Robert had gone to the station. His story was disbelieved. This was not to be wondered at, considering the paucity of his inventive powers and imagination; for Glew did not adduce a particle of corroborative detail to support his statement. The ladies simply declined to give him credence, and demanded to be shown Mr. "Bangs'" bedroom. Foiled in this amiable purpose, the determined pair announced their intentions of waiting in the parlor till the victim appeared. The landlord's renewed protests and offers of affidavits had no weight with them, and they sat down with an awful dignity.

The visit from Mrs. Hedderwick and the vicar's wife clarified things for the landlord; however, staying true to his character and interests, he stuck to his story that Robert had gone to the station. Nobody believed him, which wasn’t surprising given his lack of creativity and imagination; Glew didn’t provide any details to back up his claim. The ladies simply refused to believe him and insisted on being shown Mr. "Bangs'" bedroom. When their friendly request was denied, the determined duo decided to wait in the parlor until the victim showed up. The landlord's repeated protests and offers of affidavits didn’t sway them, and they sat down with an air of great dignity.

At two o'clock Mrs. Peters' weariness conquered her curiosity, and she went home, offering unbounded sympathy and a bed for the night. The sympathy was accepted, the bed declined, Mrs. Hedderwick declaring she would remain at the inn, if necessary sitting up in a chair till morning.

At two o'clock, Mrs. Peters' exhaustion won out over her curiosity, and she went home, offering endless sympathy and a place to sleep for the night. The sympathy was accepted, but the bed was turned down, with Mrs. Hedderwick stating she would stay at the inn, even if it meant sitting in a chair until morning.

Glew had no wish for this, and cast about him for means of getting rid of the undesired guest. At six o'clock he sent his hopeful son up-stairs, himself keeping guard over the parlor from the bar opposite. Young Glew found Robert desperate: he had not thought his wife capable of such obstinacy.

Glew didn't want this and looked for ways to get rid of the unwanted guest. At six o'clock, he sent his hopeful son upstairs while he kept watch over the living room from the bar across the room. Young Glew found Robert in despair; he hadn't believed his wife could be so stubborn.

"Dad says," began the interested youngster, "that he'll go in and talk to the lady—keep her occupied like—if you'd care to risk it and slip out."

"Dad says," started the curious kid, "that he'll go in and talk to the lady—keep her busy, you know—if you want to take the chance and sneak out."

"I will!" said Robert on the instant. Anything was better than this terrible suspense. "Let me see ... there's a train in half an hour or so ... I'll go to the station. No! I won't! Wait a minute!"

"I will!" Robert said immediately. Anything was better than this awful suspense. "Let me see ... there's a train in about half an hour ... I'll head to the station. No! I won't! Wait a minute!"

He changed his resolve, partly from quixotic, partly from selfish reasons. He did not like to leave Tony to an unknown, unguessed-at fate; and he also felt very strongly that he would like that judicious schemer's advice on his next steps. He resolved to risk all and boldly apply for admittance to The Quiet House. If matters there were really serious ... well, at all events they could not be much more serious to him than the present impasse. "I'll do it!" he declared with a sudden resolution. "Boy! when you get your father alone, tell him I've gone up to The Quiet House. I'll write to him from there. Now go down and ask him to talk to my—to the lady. Beg him to stand in the doorway and fill it up. I'll creep quietly past in ten minutes' time."

He changed his mind, partly out of a romantic notion and partly for selfish reasons. He didn’t want to leave Tony to an unknown fate, and he really felt he could use that clever schemer’s advice on what to do next. He decided to take a chance and boldly apply for admission to The Quiet House. If things there were truly serious... well, they couldn’t be much worse for him than the current deadlock. “I’ll do it!” he declared with sudden determination. “Boy! When you get your dad alone, tell him I’ve gone up to The Quiet House. I’ll write to him from there. Now go down and ask him to talk to my—to the lady. Please ask him to stand in the doorway and block it. I’ll sneak past quietly in ten minutes.”

The boy obeyed, and after ten palpitating minutes Robert stole cautiously down-stairs. True to his promise, the landlord's bulky figure blocked the parlor door, his voice raised in mournful reiteration and appeal. Robert reached the fifth step from the bottom without making the slightest noise. But the stair-rod of the fifth step had worked loose: the carpet slipped, and he tumbled down with considerable uproar. Luckily he was unhurt by the fall; but the landlord's sharp turn of the head and expression of dismayed surprise, coupled with the din, roused Mrs. Hedderwick's suspicion. "What is that?" she demanded querulously, trying to push past the landlord. At the terrific tones Robert jumped up and took to his heels.

The boy did as he was told, and after ten anxious minutes, Robert quietly made his way down the stairs. Just as he expected, the landlord's large figure blocked the parlor door, his voice raised in a sad, repeated plea. Robert reached the fifth step from the bottom without making a sound. But the stair rod on that step was loose: the carpet slipped, and he fell down with quite a racket. Fortunately, he wasn’t hurt from the fall; however, the landlord’s quick turn of the head and shocked expression, along with the noise, alerted Mrs. Hedderwick's suspicions. "What was that?" she asked irritably, trying to push past the landlord. At the loud sounds, Robert quickly got up and ran away.

His wife had common sense and did not attempt to follow, knowing she could not hope to catch the fugitive. She knew, too, that Glew was incorruptible. But as the landlord walked out to block the passage and observe the escape with a sympathetic eye, she turned to Master Glew and said decisively, "Here is half-a-crown if you can tell me where he has gone."

His wife was sensible and didn’t try to chase after him, knowing she wouldn’t be able to catch the escapee. She also realized that Glew couldn’t be bribed. But as the landlord stepped out to block the way and watch the escape with a sympathetic look, she turned to Master Glew and said firmly, “Here’s a half-crown if you can tell me where he’s gone.”

"Quiet House," said the guileless lad without hesitation, and pocketed the coin. Mrs. Hedderwick left the inn at once.

"Quiet House," said the innocent boy without any hesitation, and he put the coin in his pocket. Mrs. Hedderwick left the inn immediately.

After inquiry from a passer-by she reached her destination, a quarter of an hour behind the peccant Hedderwick. She walked up the drive, and beheld the unsuspecting Robert pouring out his grief to Tony. They were sitting in the hammock-chairs.

After asking a passerby for directions, she finally arrived at her destination, fifteen minutes later than the troublemaking Hedderwick. She walked up the driveway and saw the unaware Robert sharing his troubles with Tony. They were sitting in the hammock chairs.

Robert gave a cry and fled once more. Tony courteously waited and implored Mrs. Hedderwick to sit down and rest. "There is a misunderstanding," he said urbanely; "it shall be my pleasure to set it right." Filled with shame of his sex, determined to vindicate Robert's manhood and obtain for him a peaceful mastership, he ran after him, catching him outside the grounds as has already been described.

Robert cried out and ran away again. Tony politely waited and urged Mrs. Hedderwick to sit down and relax. "There's been a misunderstanding," he said smoothly; "I'll be happy to clear it up." Overwhelmed with shame for his gender, determined to defend Robert's masculinity and secure a calm leadership for him, he chased after him, catching up just outside the grounds as previously described.

Mrs. Hedderwick, however, was not content to wait. She did not run—no! no! perish so undignified a thought: but she proceeded very swiftly indeed in the wake of Tony. "A smooth-spoken hypocrite!" she thought ungratefully, remembering Mrs. Peter's description of Robert's accomplice during their mutual vigil. "If I only get a chance I'll give him a piece of my mind, too!" She ran—I apologize: she proceeded very swiftly—through the garden, and presently saw Tony disappear in the distance through a wicket-gate. At a convenient interval of time she followed. In front of her, a field ahead, she saw Tony and her husband standing still, their arms waving furiously. In a moment they began to walk on again, toward a little group which she now observed for the first time. Mrs. Hedderwick slackened her pace, not because her desire of vengeance was cooling, but because she did not wish to appear in a panting state. She saw the two men come to the group, and some handshaking followed. "The wretch!" she thought. "Some of his wicked friends, I suppose!" A few moments later she joined them. They looked at her with interest, and she returned the gaze unflinchingly—an iron woman. Beatrice came forward. "Mrs. Hedderwick, I think we have met before."

Mrs. Hedderwick, however, wasn’t willing to just wait. She didn’t run—no! No way would she stoop to such an undignified idea: instead, she moved quite quickly after Tony. “What a smooth-talking hypocrite!” she thought ungratefully, recalling Mrs. Peter's description of Robert's accomplice during their shared watch. “If I get the chance, I’ll give him a piece of my mind, too!” She moved quickly through the garden and soon saw Tony disappear into the distance through a side gate. After a brief moment, she followed. Up ahead, she saw Tony and her husband standing still, waving their arms wildly. They soon started walking again, heading towards a little group that she was seeing for the first time. Mrs. Hedderwick slowed down, not because her desire for revenge had faded, but because she didn’t want to look out of breath. She watched the two men approach the group, and there was some handshaking. "The scoundrel!" she thought. "Probably some of his shady friends!" A few moments later, she joined them. They looked at her with interest, and she met their gaze without flinching—like a true iron woman. Beatrice stepped forward. “Mrs. Hedderwick, I believe we’ve met before.”

It must be admitted that Mrs. Hedderwick behaved well. There was every excuse for a scene, and no possible excuse (unless one know his dull life) for Robert. Mrs. Hedderwick merely looked coldly at Beatrice and said, "We have, but I prefer not to remember it." Then she turned to her husband, "Come, Robert!"

It has to be said that Mrs. Hedderwick handled herself well. There was every reason for a scene, and no valid reason (unless you know his boring life) for Robert. Mrs. Hedderwick simply gave Beatrice a cold look and said, "We have, but I’d rather not remember it." Then she turned to her husband, "Come on, Robert!"

Mr. Hedderwick was pale, but determined. Tony's reassuring and stimulating words, together with a short breathing-space, had put courage into him. Besides, during the last minute he had conceived an idea. So, though he trembled internally, his voice was calm enough as he replied, "Alicia, I am not coming just yet."

Mr. Hedderwick was pale but resolute. Tony's comforting and encouraging words, along with a brief pause, had filled him with courage. Plus, in the last minute, he had thought of an idea. So, even though he was shaking inside, he kept his voice steady as he answered, "Alicia, I'm not coming just yet."

Tony took Beatrice by the arm. "This isn't our scene," he whispered. She obeyed the hint; and she, Lionel, Tony and Billing retired a few yards to the aeroplane, out of ear-shot. "Is it fair to leave him?" asked Beatrice; "he looked very frightened, poor little man!"

Tony took Beatrice by the arm. "This isn't our scene," he whispered. She got the hint, and she, Lionel, Tony, and Billing moved a few yards to the airplane, out of earshot. "Is it fair to leave him?" Beatrice asked; "he looked really scared, poor guy!"

"Yes—yes!" said Tony decidedly; "he must do this on his own—sink or swim. I think he'll be all right, now that I've stiffened him. Let him alone."

"Yeah—yeah!" said Tony firmly; "he has to figure this out himself—sink or swim. I think he'll be fine now that I've toughened him up. Just leave him alone."

Mrs. Hedderwick appreciated the withdrawal, but it did not soften her mood. "What do you mean, Robert?" she said coldly. "You are my husband, though you did desert me cruelly. You must come."

Mrs. Hedderwick appreciated the withdrawal, but it did not soften her mood. "What do you mean, Robert?" she said coldly. "You are my husband, even though you deserted me cruelly. You have to come."

"I come on conditions," said Robert stoutly, though his knees were quaking. "I mean to be master of the house in future—to do exactly what I like and when I like—to go to Brighton, if I choose——"

"I come with conditions," Robert said firmly, even though his knees were shaking. "I plan to be the master of the house from now on—to do exactly what I want and when I want—to go to Brighton, if I decide to——"

"Don't be absurd," said Mrs. Hedderwick.

"Don't be ridiculous," said Mrs. Hedderwick.

"I mean what I say," he reiterated. "I'm—I'm still very fond of you, Alicia, but I must be master——"

"I mean what I say," he repeated. "I'm—I'm still very fond of you, Alicia, but I need to be in charge——"

"Don't be absurd," said Mrs. Hedderwick, still unmoved. "You will come home with me to-night."

"Don't be ridiculous," Mrs. Hedderwick said, remaining unyielding. "You are coming home with me tonight."

She advanced and took his arm in a wifely grasp. Robert, feeling the chains imminent, resolved to play his last card. It was his sole remaining hope of freedom. Bruskly he freed his arm. Then with incredible agility he ran to the aeroplane and scrambled into the pilot's seat. "Now, then!" he said grimly; "you admit that I am to be head, and I'll come down. Otherwise I'll start this infernal machine. I don't much care what happens."

She moved forward and linked her arm with his in a familiar way. Robert, sensing the impending constraints, decided to make his final move. It was his only remaining chance for freedom. Abruptly, he pulled his arm away. Then, with impressive speed, he dashed to the airplane and climbed into the pilot's seat. "Alright then!" he said sternly; "you admit that I am in charge, and I'll come down. Otherwise, I'll fire up this damn machine. I really don't care what happens."

"Robert!" screamed his wife, shaken out of her composure. "Oh, Robert! come down!"

"Robert!" his wife yelled, rattled out of her calm. "Oh, Robert! Come down!"

"Not till you promise!" he said, fumbling at unaccustomed levers. "Here, sir! how do you start it?"

"Not until you promise!" he said, awkwardly trying to operate unfamiliar controls. "Hey, sir! How do you start this thing?"

"You fool!" shouted Billing, alarmed, as chance directed Robert to the object of his search. "Stand clear!" he screamed, fearing the propeller would start and hit the bystanders. He pulled Beatrice aside, and Tony did the same for Mrs. Hedderwick. "Stop it, you fool! No!—the other lever! The machine will be up in a minute."

"You idiot!" yelled Billing, alarmed, as luck led Robert to what he was looking for. "Get back!" he shouted, worried that the propeller might start and injure the onlookers. He grabbed Beatrice and pulled her aside, while Tony did the same for Mrs. Hedderwick. "Cut it out, you idiot! No!—the other lever! The machine will be running in a minute."

"Promise!" screamed Robert, like one possessed. He was playing for life now, and was past caring.

"Promise!" shouted Robert, as if he were out of his mind. He was in it for his life now and had lost all concern.

"I—I promise!" wailed Mrs. Hedderwick, as the propeller began to move, and then at last Robert obeyed the frantic instructions of Billing and stopped the engine. He descended with all the honors of war.

"I—I promise!" cried Mrs. Hedderwick as the propeller started to turn, and finally, Robert followed Billing's urgent orders and shut off the engine. He got down with all the honors of war.

"You will excuse us," he said with a pale smile, taking Mrs. Hedderwick by the arm. "We are stopping at The Happy Heart to-night. Perhaps, to-morrow...."

"You’ll excuse us," he said with a faint smile, taking Mrs. Hedderwick by the arm. "We’re staying at The Happy Heart tonight. Maybe tomorrow...."

He retired at the right moment, his wife beneath his manly protecting arm. "There! there!" he whispered soothingly as they walked off; "it's all right now, my love! You mustn't be frightened."

He retired at the right moment, with his wife under his strong protective arm. "There! There!" he whispered gently as they walked away; "it's all good now, my love! You shouldn't be scared."

"Oh, Robert!" said Mrs. Hedderwick. "How could you—how could you do it! I—I didn't know you had it in you!"

"Oh, Robert!" Mrs. Hedderwick exclaimed. "How could you—how could you do it! I—I had no idea you had it in you!"

Robert expanded a hero's chest.

Robert expanded a hero's confidence.

"My dear, love is proverbially blind."

"My dear, love is famously blind."


CHAPTER XXVI

THE USUAL THING

Beatrice and the three men watched the passing of the Hedderwicks in amused silence. When they had disappeared from view Billing said, "Well, that's done ... and now, Miss Blair, I'm really going."

Beatrice and the three men observed the Hedderwicks passing by in amused silence. Once they were out of sight, Billing said, "Well, that’s done ... and now, Miss Blair, I’m really leaving."

"Me, too," said Tony lightly. "I mean to have a shy for that seven-thirty train."

"Me, too," Tony said casually. "I plan to catch that seven-thirty train."

"Then you're determined?" said Beatrice to both men. Billing nodded with a smiling melancholy. Tony smiled more cheerfully. Though this interview with Miss Arkwright in the afternoon had opened his eyes, he was not so hard hit as the air-man: things had not had time to go so far.

"Then you're set on this?" Beatrice asked both men. Billing nodded with a bittersweet smile. Tony smiled more brightly. Even though his afternoon conversation with Miss Arkwright had opened his eyes, he wasn't affected as deeply as the pilot: things hadn't progressed as much.

"I'll just wait and see the machine start," he said. "Then ho! for the station and prosaic London once more!"

"I'll just wait and watch the machine start," he said. "Then off we go to the station and back to boring London again!"

"If you like," said Billing, "I'll take you back to Brooklands with me. This is a two-seater. Unless you've a bad head for heights."

"If you want," Billing said, "I'll take you back to Brooklands with me. This is a two-seater. Unless you're not good with heights."

"I've fallen from too many to mind," said Tony ruefully. "My biggest drop occurred this afternoon. Thanks very much. If you'll give me time to collar a coat and a rug, I'm your man."

"I've had too many falls to count," Tony said with a sigh. "My worst one happened this afternoon. Thanks a lot. If you give me a moment to grab a coat and a blanket, I’m your guy."

He ran off, leaving them chatting, but he was back in a very short time bearing the necessary articles. "I bagged the first I could lay hands on," he explained, getting into the overcoat. "I hope nobody——"

He ran off, leaving them talking, but he returned very quickly with the necessary items. "I grabbed the first thing I could find," he explained, putting on the overcoat. "I hope nobody——"

"Er—the coat happens to be mine," said Lionel pointedly. He liked Tony very well, but could hardly stomach so unblushing a theft. "Sorry, old chap, but I may want——"

"Um—the coat actually belongs to me," Lionel said directly. He liked Tony a lot, but he could hardly accept such an obvious theft. "Sorry, my friend, but I might need——"

Tony put both hands on his shoulders and gazed deep into his eyes.

Tony placed both hands on his shoulders and looked deeply into his eyes.

"Little man," he said calmly, "listen to your wise old uncle. You won't want it. Take it from me that you won't want it. I'll send it back to-morrow. That will be in heaps of time."

"Hey, kid," he said calmly, "listen to your wise old uncle. You won't want it. Take it from me, you won't want it. I'll send it back tomorrow. That will be plenty of time."

"Time for what?" said the puzzled Lionel, smiling out of sheer sympathy with the quizzical glance. "Oh, well—take it and be hanged to you!"

"Time for what?" asked the confused Lionel, smiling purely out of sympathy for the puzzled look. "Oh, well—take it and good luck to you!"

"Thanks," said Tony. Then he took off his cap and advanced to Beatrice. "Good-by!" he said brightly. "Thanks a thousand times. I'll send you a picture post-card announcing my safe arrival."

"Thanks," Tony said. Then he removed his cap and walked over to Beatrice. "Goodbye!" he said cheerfully. "Thanks a million times. I'll send you a postcard letting you know I've arrived safely."

"And another to say when you've started work!" said Beatrice, smiling a little mistily. "Don't forget that!"

"And another thing to remember when you start working!" Beatrice said, smiling a bit dreamily. "Don't forget that!"

"I start on Monday," he replied. "Don't know what it will be yet—perhaps aeroplanes, perhaps politics, possibly poultry farming. But it's going to materialize. Good-by, and—the very best!"

"I start on Monday," he said. "I’m not sure what it will be yet—maybe airplanes, maybe politics, possibly chicken farming. But it's going to happen. Goodbye, and—best of luck!"

Billing, who had said good-by, was already in the pilot's seat. "Come on!" he grunted mournfully, knowing he was bidding farewell to hopes managerial as well as amatory. Tony climbed up behind him and tucked the rug well round. "Let her go!" he said cheerfully. In obedience to the order Lionel gave the propeller a swing, the engine started, and in a few seconds the aeroplane began to run swiftly over the ground. Beatrice drew close to Lionel and put her arm through his. It seemed such a natural thing that he felt no surprise whatever, but only a tumultuous happiness. Together they stood watching the machine as it took the air and soared up in the magic of mechanical flight. They waved a final adieu, and Tony flourished his cap.

Billing, who had said goodbye, was already in the pilot's seat. "Come on!" he grunted sadly, knowing he was saying farewell to both his career ambitions and romantic hopes. Tony climbed up behind him and wrapped the rug around him tightly. "Let her go!" he said cheerfully. Following the command, Lionel swung the propeller, the engine roared to life, and in a few seconds, the airplane started rolling swiftly across the ground. Beatrice stepped close to Lionel and linked her arm with his. It felt so natural that he was not surprised at all, just overwhelmingly happy. Together they watched as the plane took off and soared into the magic of flight. They waved a final goodbye, and Tony waved his cap.

"What would you say," shouted Billing when they had risen a hundred feet, "if I let her drop suddenly?"

"What would you say," shouted Billing when they had risen a hundred feet, "if I let her drop suddenly?"

"Shouldn't have cared a week ago," shouted Tony in return; "you mustn't now."

"Shouldn't have cared a week ago," shouted Tony back; "you shouldn't care now."

Billing grunted unintelligibly and gave his undivided attention to the pilotage....

Billing grunted without making sense and focused entirely on the navigation....

On the dull earth below Beatrice and Lionel were walking silently toward the house. They were still arm in arm, but no word was spoken till they had reached the shelter of the garden. Then Lionel stopped and took her by the hands. "Ah, Beatrice!" he said.

On the dull ground below, Beatrice and Lionel were walking quietly toward the house. They were still holding each other’s arms, but no words were exchanged until they reached the safety of the garden. Then Lionel stopped and took her hands. "Ah, Beatrice!" he said.

"Not yet! Not yet!" she breathed, holding back and inflaming his passion the more. "Wait a little! You mustn't say anything yet! Let us approach it sensibly and in a rational balanced mood if we can." She broke from him and laughed merrily. "Let us go in and have dinner first. Afterward, we can talk in the garden."

"Not yet! Not yet!" she gasped, holding back and igniting his desire even more. "Just wait a bit! You can’t say anything yet! Let’s handle this calmly and with a clear head, if we can." She pulled away from him and laughed happily. "Let’s go inside and have dinner first. After that, we can chat in the garden."

"Tell me one thing," he said impetuously, "and I will be patient. Was there ever a Lukos?"

"Tell me one thing," he said impulsively, "and I will be patient. Was there ever a Lukos?"

"I will tell you two things," she said, laughing a little wildly. "You ought to know them before you speak. With them you must be content for an hour. There was no Lukos, and Miss Arkwright and I are the same creature."

"I'll tell you two things," she said, laughing a bit chaotically. "You should know them before you talk. You'll have to be okay with them for an hour. There wasn't any Lukos, and Miss Arkwright and I are the same person."

He had suspected it a hundred times, and a hundred times he had found fresh evidence to discredit the suspicion. He knew it must be true, though he could not grasp it yet. But he did not care. The fact that he had been hoodwinked and made a plaything did not trouble him in the least. All he was conscious of was that she was free. He laughed quietly, now completely master of himself.

He had suspected it a hundred times, and a hundred times he had found fresh evidence to disprove the suspicion. He knew it had to be true, even if he couldn't grasp it yet. But it didn't bother him. The fact that he had been tricked and treated like a fool didn't trouble him at all. All he was aware of was that she was free. He laughed quietly, now completely in control of himself.

"That will do to go on with," he said; "now let us be sensible, as you suggest, and have dinner."

"That’s enough for now," he said; "let’s be practical, as you suggested, and have dinner."

The meal was a great success, despite the presence of Forbes, who hovered about them like a benignant and sympathetic butterfly. Lionel could hardly help smiling at him, remembering his recent slip and the sudden recovery of speech. Forbes seemed entirely unconscious, handing the plates with an air that was almost fatherly; and Lionel regretted the obvious necessity of his dismissal in the roseate and fast-approaching millennium. He was not impatient now, perfectly disposed to laugh, eat, drink, be merry and take a fair share in the conversation that sparkled between them. It was a talk as of old, when they spoke freely and lightly of surface themes—the play, the latest book, the morning's news—the clash of wit and opinion sounding bravely through the room.

The meal was a great success, even with Forbes hanging around like a kind and supportive butterfly. Lionel couldn't help but smile at him, recalling his recent slip and sudden recovery of speech. Forbes seemed completely unaware, passing the plates with an almost fatherly vibe; and Lionel felt a bit regretful about the obvious need to let him go in the bright and approaching future. He was not impatient now, fully ready to laugh, eat, drink, enjoy himself, and engage in the lively conversation happening around them. It was a conversation like in the old days when they chatted casually and freely about surface topics—the play, the latest book, the morning's news—with the clash of wit and opinions ringing out confidently in the room.

They smoked a cigarette each over their coffee, but still the talk was of mundane matters, though neither was ill at ease. There is a telepathy of souls that can send true messages beneath the cover of human speech.

They each smoked a cigarette over their coffee, yet the conversation remained about ordinary things, though neither felt uncomfortable. There’s a silent connection between souls that can convey real messages beneath the surface of human conversation.

At last Beatrice said, "Let us go into the garden," and he rose briskly at the command. She allowed him to help her with her cloak, and then said, laughing: "But Tony has your coat! What will you do?"

At last, Beatrice said, "Let's go into the garden," and he quickly got up at her request. She let him help her with her cloak and then laughed, saying, "But Tony has your coat! What will you do?"

"I shan't need one," he replied. "It's a lovely night."

"I won't need one," he replied. "It's a beautiful night."

"You will," she insisted. "I can't have you catching cold. I'll tell Forbes——"

"You will," she insisted. "I can't let you catch a cold. I'll tell Forbes——"

"No, really," he protested, and threw open the door. "See, what a glorious night it is! There's not the least need."

"No, seriously," he protested, flinging open the door. "Look, what a beautiful night it is! There's really no need."

She did not press the point, for indeed it was a night for lovers. There was not a breath of wind in the air, no sound of the works of man to mar the stillness. From a distant field came the dim wheezing of a corn-crake; nearer at hand a nightingale was beginning his epithalamic welcome. A light dew was falling, but nothing to hurt a lover and his lass, full of health and joyousness. The trees did not even sigh a greeting: the solemn hush made them imagine that nature herself was holding her breath in friendly expectation, waiting to hear the old tale in the newest words, ready to break out into a chorus of free congratulation. Already Lionel could hear the leaves whispering the gay tidings, every blade of grass passing on the news, the grasshoppers and glowworms waking their more sleepy fellows to tell them Beatrice was here and had said she loved him, the birds waiting happily in their nests till the first kiss sounded, and then tucking in their heads with a jolly "So that's all right at last!" He wanted to say "Thank you" to the world of beasts and trees and flowers, and presently to the world of men and women.

She didn’t push the issue, because it was definitely a night for lovers. There wasn’t a breath of wind, and the silence was undisturbed by any sounds of human activity. In the distance, you could hear the faint croaking of a corn-crake; closer by, a nightingale was starting his celebratory song. A light dew was falling, but it was nothing to bother a couple in love, full of health and happiness. The trees didn’t even rustle a greeting: the profound stillness made them think that nature itself was holding its breath in eager anticipation, ready to hear the familiar story in new words, ready to break into a chorus of cheerful congratulations. Already, Lionel could hear the leaves whispering the joyful news, every blade of grass passing it along, grasshoppers and glowworms waking their sleepier friends to tell them Beatrice was here and had said she loved him, while the birds waited cheerfully in their nests until the first kiss happened, then tucked in their heads with a cheerful "So that's settled at last!" He wanted to say "Thank you" to the world of animals, trees, and flowers, and soon enough, to the world of men and women.

"Smoke, do!" said Beatrice, as he dragged a couple of the chairs upon the gravel. "And don't interrupt more than you can help. I'll tell you the essential facts as shortly as I can. Details we can talk over later ... if there is to be a 'later.'"

"Go ahead and smoke!" Beatrice said, as he pulled a couple of chairs across the gravel. "And try not to interrupt too much. I’ll share the key points as briefly as possible. We can discuss the details later... if there is a 'later.'"

He lighted a cigarette and was silent.

He lit a cigarette and remained quiet.

"Most of the tale I told you," she began abruptly, "was all lies. Some was true. I was, for instance, well-off as regards money, when I was left an orphan at sixteen. I was brought up by some hateful relations and launched two years later. I got sick of society in a couple of years, and cut it for pleasanter paths. I tried painting, but it bored me. Then the stage—that part was true—and made a success....

"Most of the story I shared with you," she started suddenly, "was mostly untrue. Some of it was real. For example, I was financially secure when I became an orphan at sixteen. I was raised by some terrible relatives and set loose two years later. I got tired of society in a few years and left it for more enjoyable pursuits. I tried painting, but it didn’t interest me. Then I went to the stage—that part was true—and found success...."

"It wasn't enough. I wanted more interest, more reality in life. I didn't find it—I haven't quite found it yet, but I think I'm on the way to it. I wanted romance, too. I also wanted fun. Oh, yes! I wanted a lot, there's no doubt about that.... Presently I determined I wanted a husband....

"It wasn't enough. I wanted more excitement, more real experiences in life. I didn't find it—I still haven’t completely found it, but I think I'm getting closer. I wanted romance, too. I also wanted to have fun. Oh, yes! I wanted a lot, that's for sure.... Right now, I've decided I want a husband...."

"Does that sound odd from a girl's lips? Well, it's true, and I don't care much about anything except truth just now. I set to work deliberately to find some one I could love and who would love me. Are you shocked?" she asked quickly.

"Does that sound strange coming from a girl? Well, it's true, and right now, I don't care about anything except the truth. I started looking intentionally for someone I could love and who would love me back. Are you surprised?" she asked quickly.

"No," he said quietly, flicking the ash from his cigarette. "Go on."

"No," he said softly, flicking the ash off his cigarette. "Go ahead."

"So I went husband-hunting. Not much need, you may say, for a girl on the stage to do that. Of course I had plenty of men running after me—some beasts, some good sorts. They didn't do. I wanted something worth loving; a man who was strong, but human; a man with a sense of humor and not too grown-up for romance—a kind of Admirable Crichton, in fact. I didn't find him—at all events, not at first.

"So I started looking for a husband. You might think there's no real need for a girl on stage to do that. Sure, I had plenty of guys chasing after me—some jerks, some decent guys. But they didn’t cut it. I wanted something worth loving; a man who was strong but also relatable; a guy with a sense of humor who wasn't too serious for romance—a kind of Admirable Crichton, really. I didn’t find him—at least, not at first."

"This Turkish tale I made up for two reasons,—one, the purely irresponsible childish enjoyment of a fairy tale—a lark, if you like! Two, for a test. If my projected benedict could swallow that—believe it, if possible, but at all events not refuse it because it looked so silly—well, he would do on the romantic side. But he had to be a man and a strong man, too; hence the invention of Lukos for a further test."

"This Turkish story I created for two reasons—first, just the carefree joy of a fairy tale—a bit of fun, if you will! Second, as a test. If the guy I have in mind could accept this—believe it if you can, but at least not reject it because it seems so ridiculous—well, he would be good for the romantic aspect. But he needed to be a man, a strong one too; that’s why I came up with Lukos for another test."

"A pretty hard one," he interposed.

"A pretty tough one," he said.

"Pretty hard," she agreed, "but I meant to have the best. I tried the tale on two or three men who seemed good sorts, during a period of three months or so. They all failed for ... one reason or another. Then, by a lucky chance, you came and succeeded. That's all."

"Pretty tough," she agreed, "but I wanted to have the best. I shared the story with two or three guys who seemed decent over the course of about three months. They all fell short for... various reasons. Then, by a stroke of luck, you came along and made it happen. That's it."

"And Mizzi?"

"And Mizzi?"

"My faithful helper and plagiarist. She got bitten with the romantic notion too, and set her lover a somewhat similar task. She invented the burglary."

"My loyal assistant and copycat. She got caught up in the romantic idea as well and gave her partner a somewhat similar challenge. She came up with the idea of the burglary."

"Tony Wild?"

"Is that Tony Wild?"

"Luck," she confessed. "I worked the broad outlines of the scheme, but added to it as circumstances helped. The ambassador was an old friend, and I used his presence here to give verisimilitude. He didn't know, of course, and the day he caught you here I was afraid my schemes would be blurted out by his calling me 'Miss Blair.' Luck helped me there."

"Luck," she admitted. "I laid out the basic plan, but I adapted it as situations changed. The ambassador was an old friend, and I used his presence here to make it seem more believable. He didn't know, of course, and the day he found you here, I was worried that my plans would be revealed when he called me 'Miss Blair.' Fortunately, luck was on my side."

"Hedderwick?"

"Hedderwick?"

"Sheer madness. I wanted a new adventure that night, and risked the police court. I trusted to my wits to get us out if caught. If not, well, 'the papers have been stolen!'"

"Absolute craziness. That night, I was craving a new adventure and was willing to risk the police court. I relied on my instincts to get us out if we got caught. If not, well, 'the papers have been stolen!'"

"The dumb servants?"

"The clueless staff?"

"The gardener really is dumb. Forbes I gave five pounds a week to sham, for safety's sake. I couldn't risk his talking in the village. I've only had this house two months—I wanted it for perfect rest. I didn't come down here every day—just when the mood took me. I used to motor up to London at night, sometimes sending the car back empty (Forbes drove), sometimes coming myself. When you were here I used to leave the car a mile away and walk."

"The gardener really is clueless. I paid Forbes five pounds a week to pretend, just to be safe. I couldn't risk him chatting in the village. I've only had this house for two months—I wanted it for complete relaxation. I didn’t come down here every day—only when I felt like it. I used to drive to London at night, sometimes sending the car back empty (Forbes drove), and sometimes I would come back myself. When you were here, I would leave the car a mile away and walk."

"Alone!"

"By myself!"

"Oh, yes," she smiled. "I always carried the revolver for protection. That was true in a sense. I was never interfered with, though I had some trouble at times dodging Tony, Brown and Mr. Hedderwick. It was exciting work."

"Oh, definitely," she smiled. "I always kept the revolver for safety. That was true in a way. I was never bothered, even though I had some trouble at times avoiding Tony, Brown, and Mr. Hedderwick. It was thrilling work."

He laughed, at her courage and his ignorance of her. She laughed gaily in return.

He laughed at her bravery and his lack of understanding about her. She laughed happily in response.

"Is that enough?"

"Is that sufficient?"

"Not quite," he demurred. "Why were you so angry with Mizzi that night you caught us?"

"Not exactly," he replied. "Why were you so angry with Mizzi that night you saw us?"

She blushed.

She turned red.

"Ah! I am ashamed to tell you that. One day perhaps I shall ... not now."

"Ah! I'm embarrassed to share that. Maybe one day I will ... not right now."

"I kissed her, you know," he said frankly. She sat up.

"I kissed her, you know," he said openly. She sat up.

"When?"

"When's that?"

"In London, the first night."

"First night in London."

"Not since?"

"Not since?"

"Never."

"Not ever."

She sat down again.

She sat down again.

"A proof of humanity," she smiled. "She's quite charming, I know. Is that all?"

"A proof of humanity," she smiled. "She's really charming, I know. Is that it?"

"Not yet. Wasn't it very hard to keep up the two rôles?"

"Not yet. Wasn't it really difficult to juggle the two roles?"

"Hard, but, not so very hard to a woman who has brains and is an actress. It was interesting, and I enjoyed watching you."

"Challenging, but not too difficult for a smart woman who's an actress. It was intriguing, and I enjoyed watching you."

"Tell me; suppose I had kissed Miss Arkwright. Would you have forgiven me?"

"Tell me, if I had kissed Miss Arkwright, would you have forgiven me?"

The answer came quickly.

The answer arrived quickly.

"Yes. But I'm so glad you didn't!"

"Yes. But I'm really glad you didn't!"

"I, too," he confessed. And then, "I think that's all."

"I also," he admitted. Then, "I believe that's everything."

There was a complete silence for half a minute, while he struggled to find words to say to this most lovely woman. He could find none. Each knew the other's heart already, and words seemed vain and meaningless. "Oh, Beatrice darling!" he said, almost with a sob, "don't keep me waiting any longer! I want you! I want you!"

There was total silence for half a minute as he tried to find the right words to say to this beautiful woman. He couldn't think of any. They both understood each other’s feelings already, and words felt pointless and empty. “Oh, Beatrice, darling!” he said, nearly in tears, “please don’t make me wait any longer! I want you! I want you!”

"Lal, dearest!" she said.

"Lal, my dear!" she said.


"And this is the end," she said presently with a little sigh. "We shall just get married and settle into stodgy conventional people. It sounds flat, doesn't it?"

"And this is it," she said after a moment, letting out a small sigh. "We'll just get married and turn into boring, conventional people. It sounds dull, doesn't it?"

"Why should it be the end? We can be happy and ourselves, too. We can still have romance, adventures, though youth passes——"

"Why does it have to be the end? We can be happy and true to ourselves. We can still have romance and adventures, even as we get older—"

She shook her head.

She shook her head.

"No; we shall have happiness, but never the same as this. We have been lucky and had the most splendid fun. But now, whether we wish it or not, we shall have to grow up and try to find out what life is."

"No; we will find happiness, but it will never be the same as this. We've been fortunate and had the best time. But now, whether we like it or not, we have to grow up and figure out what life is."

"Well, we'll bargain for one adventure a year, at least," he stipulated. "Old or young, we'll have that!"

"Alright, we'll negotiate for at least one adventure a year," he said. "Whether we're old or young, that's happening!"

"We must earn it, Lal!" she said with a wise smile. "We've no right to such happiness unless——"

"We need to earn it, Lal!" she said with a knowing smile. "We don't deserve such happiness unless——"

"Make me your debtor now!" he said, clasping her more closely. "Beatrice, darling, I love you! Do you realize it? I love you!"

"Make me your debtor now!" he said, holding her tighter. "Beatrice, sweetheart, I love you! Do you understand that? I love you!"

She breathed one word, the most perfect pledge a man could hope for.

She whispered one word, the most perfect promise a man could ever hope for.

"Egotist!"

"Self-centered!"

THE END


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