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NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH
Just the truth
By
By
FREDERIC S. ISHAM
FREDERIC S. ISHAM
Author of
Author of
The Strollers, Under the Rose,
The Strollers, Under the Rose,
The Social Buccaneer, Etc.
The Social Pirate, Etc.
INDIANAPOLIS
INDY
THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY
THE BOBBS-MERRILL COMPANY
PUBLISHERS
PUBLISHERS
Copyright 1914
Copyright 1914
The Bobbs-Merrill Company
The Bobbs-Merrill Company
PRESS OF
PRESS OF
BRAUNWORTH & CO.
BRAUNWORTH & CO.
BOOKBINDERS AND PRINTERS
Bookbinders and printers
BROOKLYN, N. Y.
Brooklyn, NY
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH
TRUTH ONLY
CHAPTER I—THE TEMERITY OF BOB
“It can’t be done.”
“It's impossible.”
“Of course, it can.”
“Definitely, it can.”
“A man couldn’t survive the ordeal.”
“A man couldn’t get through the ordeal.”
“Could do it myself.”
"I can handle it."
The scene was the University Club. The talk spread over a good deal of space, as talk will when pink cocktails, or “green gardens in a glass” confront, or are in front of, the talkees. Dickie said it couldn’t be done and Bob said it was possible and that he could do it. He might not have felt such confidence had it not been for the verdant stimulation. He could have done anything just then, so why not this particular feat or stunt? And who was this temerarious one and what was he like?
The scene was the University Club. The conversation spread out over a lot of space, as conversations do when pink cocktails, or “green gardens in a glass,” are in front of the people talking. Dickie said it couldn’t be done, and Bob said it was possible and that he could do it. He might not have felt such confidence if it weren't for the green stimulation. He felt he could tackle anything at that moment, so why not this specific challenge? And who was this daring guy, and what was he like?
As an excellent specimen of a masculine young animal, genus homo, Bob Bennett was good to look on. Some of those young ladies who wave banners when young men strain their backs and their arms and their legs in the cause of learning, had, in the days of the not remote past, dubbed him, sub rosa, the “blue-eyed Apollo.” Some of the fellows not so euphemistically inclined had, however, during that same glorious period found frequent occasion to refer to him less classically, if more truthfully, as “that darn fool, Bob Bennett.” That was on account of a streak of wildness in him, for he was a free bold creature, was Bob. Conventional bars and gates chafed him. He may have looked like a “blue-eyed Apollo,” but his spirit had the wings of a wild goose, than which there are no faster birds—for a wild goose is the biplane of the empyrean.
As an excellent example of a young man, Bob Bennett was quite a sight to see. Some of the ladies who cheer on young men as they push themselves in their pursuit of knowledge had, not too long ago, secretly nicknamed him the “blue-eyed Apollo.” However, some of his friends, who weren't as sophisticated, had often referred to him more straightforwardly, if less flattering, as “that darn fool, Bob Bennett.” This was because he had a wild streak; he was a free-spirited guy, Bob. Conventional rules and restrictions bothered him. He might have looked like a “blue-eyed Apollo,” but his spirit was as free as a wild goose, which are the fastest birds—because a wild goose is like the biplane of the sky.
Now that Bob had ceased the chase for learning and was out in the wide world, he should have acquired an additional sobriquet—that of “Impecunious Bob.” It would have fitted his pecuniary condition very nicely. Once he had had great expectations, but alas!—dad had just “come a cropper.” They had sheared him on the street. The world in general didn’t know about it yet, but Bob did.
Now that Bob had stopped chasing knowledge and was out in the real world, he should have picked up a new nickname—“Broke Bob.” It would have suited his financial situation perfectly. Once, he had big dreams, but unfortunately, his dad had just hit rock bottom. They had taken everything from him on the street. The world at large didn’t know about it yet, but Bob did.
“We’re broke, Bob,” said dad that very morning.
“We're broke, Bob,” Dad said that very morning.
“That’s all right, Gov.,” said Bob. “Can you get up?”
"That's okay, boss," Bob said. "Can you get up?"
“I can’t even procure a pair of crutches to hobble with,” answered dad.
“I can’t even get a pair of crutches to walk with,” answered dad.
“Never mind,” observed Bob magnanimously. “You’ve done pretty well by me up to date. Don’t you worry or reproach yourself. I’m not going to heap abuse on those gray hairs.”
“Never mind,” Bob said generously. “You’ve done well by me so far. Don’t worry or blame yourself. I’m not going to criticize those gray hairs.”
“Thanks, Bob.” Coolly. “I’m not worrying. You see, it’s up to you now.”
“Thanks, Bob.” Coolly. “I’m not stressing. You see, it’s up to you now.”
“Me?” Bob stared.
“Me?” Bob asked, wide-eyed.
“Yes. You see I believe in the Japanese method.”
“Yes. You see, I believe in the Japanese approach.”
“What’s that?” Uneasily.
"What’s that?" nervously.
“Duty of a child to support his parent, when said child is grown up!”
“It's a grown child's responsibility to support their parent!”
Bob whistled. “Say, Gov., do you mean it?”
Bob whistled. “Hey, Governor, do you really mean that?”
“Gospel truth, Bob.”
“Truth, Bob.”
Bob whistled again. “Not joking?”
Bob whistled again. “Seriously?”
“’Pon honor!” Cheerfully.
"On my honor!" Cheerfully.
“I never did like the Japanese,” from Bob, sotto voce. “Blame lot of heathens—that’s what they are!”
“I never did like the Japanese,” Bob said quietly. “Just a bunch of heathens—that’s what they are!”
“I’ve got a dollar or two that I owe tucked away where no one can find it except me,” went on dad, unmindful of Bob’s little soliloquy. “That will have to last until you come to the rescue.”
“I’ve got a dollar or two that I owe stashed away where no one can find it except me,” Dad continued, oblivious to Bob’s little speech. “That will have to last until you come to the rescue.”
“Gee! I’m glad you were thoughtful enough for that!” ejaculated the young man. “Sure you can keep it hidden?”
“Wow! I’m really glad you thought of that!” exclaimed the young man. “Are you sure you can keep it a secret?”
“Burglars couldn’t find it,” said dad confidently, “let alone my creditors—God bless them! But it won’t last long, Bob. Bear that in mind. It’ll be a mighty short respite.”
“Burglars couldn’t find it,” Dad said confidently, “not to mention my creditors—God bless them! But it won’t last long, Bob. Keep that in mind. It’ll be a really short break.”
“Oh, I’ll not forget it. If—if it’s not an impertinence, may I ask what you are going to do, dad?”
“Oh, I won’t forget it. If—if it’s not rude, may I ask what you are going to do, Dad?”
“I’m contemplating a fishing trip, first of all, and after that—quien sabe? Some pleasure suitable to my retired condition will undoubtedly suggest itself. I may take up the study of philosophy. Confucius has always interested me. They say it takes forty years to read him and then forty years to digest what you have read. The occupation would, no doubt, prove adequate. But don’t concern yourself about that, dear boy. I’ll get on. You owe me a large debt of gratitude. I’m thrusting a great responsibility on you. It should be the making of you.” Bob had his secret doubts. “Get out and hustle, dear boy. It’s up to you, now!” And he spread out his hands in care-free fashion and smiled blandly. No Buddha could have appeared more complacent—only instead of a lotus flower, Bob’s dad held in his hand a long black weed, the puffing of which seemed to afford a large measure of ecstatic satisfaction. “Go!” He waved the free hand. “My blessing on your efforts.”
“I’m thinking about going on a fishing trip first, and who knows what’s next? I’m sure some enjoyable activity that fits my laid-back lifestyle will come to mind. I might start studying philosophy. I've always found Confucius interesting. They say it takes forty years to read him and another forty to really understand it. That could be a good way to keep busy. But don’t worry about that, dear boy. I’ll manage. You owe me a big thank you. I’m putting a lot of responsibility on you. This should really help you grow.” Bob had his doubts. “Get out there and make things happen, dear boy. It’s all on you now!” He spread his arms casually and smiled nonchalantly. No Buddha could have looked more satisfied—except instead of a lotus flower, Bob’s dad was holding a long black weed, the smoke from which seemed to bring him a lot of joy. “Go!” He waved his other hand. “You have my blessing for your efforts.”
Bob started to go, and then he lingered. “Perhaps,” he said, “you can tell me what I am going to do?”
Bob started to leave, but then he hesitated. “Maybe,” he said, “you can tell me what I'm going to do?”
“Don’t know.” Cheerfully.
"Not sure." Cheerfully.
“What can I do?” Hopelessly.
“What can I do?” Hopelessly.
“Couldn’t say.”
“Can't say.”
“I don’t know anything.”
"I don’t know anything."
“Ha! ha!” Dad laughed, as if son had sprung a joke. “Well, that is a condition experience will remove. Experience and hard knocks,” he added.
“Ha! ha!” Dad laughed, like his son had just told a joke. “Well, that's something experience will fix. Experience and some tough lessons,” he added.
Bob swore softly. His head was humming. No heroic purpose to get out and fight his way moved him. He didn’t care about shoveling earth, or chopping down trees. He had no frenzied desire to brave the sixty-below-zero temperature of the Klondike in a mad search for gold. In a word, he didn’t feel at all like the heroes in the books who conquer under almost impossible conditions in the vastnesses of the “open,” and incidentally whallop a few herculean simple-minded sons of nature, just to prove that breed is better than brawn.
Bob cursed quietly. His head was buzzing. He had no grand reason to go out and fight his way through. He didn’t care about digging in the dirt or cutting down trees. He had no intense urge to face the minus sixty-degree temperatures of the Klondike in a crazy search for gold. In short, he didn’t feel like the heroes in books who succeed against nearly impossible odds out in the wilderness, while also taking down a few strong but simple-minded guys just to show that brains are better than muscle.
“Of course, I could give you a little advice, Bob,” said the governor softly. “If you should find hustling a bit arduous for one of your luxurious nature, there’s an alternative. It is always open to a young man upon whom nature has showered her favors.”
“Of course, I can give you a little advice, Bob,” said the governor gently. “If you find hustling a bit tough for someone as accustomed to luxury as you, there’s another option. It’s always available to a young man who has been blessed by nature.”
“Don’t know what you mean by that last,” growled Bob, who disliked personalities. “But what is the alternative to hustling?”
“Not sure what you mean by that last part,” Bob grumbled, who wasn’t a fan of personalities. “But what’s the alternative to hustling?”
“Get married,” said dad coolly.
“Get married,” said Dad coolly.
Bob changed color. Dad watched him keenly.
Bob changed color. Dad watched him closely.
“There’s always the matrimonial market for young men who have not learned to specialize. I’ve known many such marriages to turn out happily, too. Marrying right, my boy, is a practical, not a sentimental business.”
“There's always a marriage market for young men who haven't figured out their niche. I've seen a lot of those marriages end up happy, too. Finding the right partner, my boy, is a practical matter, not just about feelings.”
Bob looked disgusted.
Bob looked grossed out.
“There’s Miss Gwendoline Gerald, for example. Millions in her own name, and—”
“There’s Miss Gwendoline Gerald, for instance. Millions to her name, and—”
“Hold on, dad!” cried Bob. His face was flaming now. The blue eyes gleamed almost fiercely.
“Hold on, Dad!” shouted Bob. His face was bright red now. His blue eyes shone almost fiercely.
“I knew you were acquainted,” observed dad softly, still studying him. “Besides she’s a beautiful girl and—”
“I knew you two knew each other,” Dad said quietly, still looking at him. “Plus, she’s a beautiful girl and—”
“Drop it, dad!” burst from Bob. “We’ve never had a quarrel, but—” Suddenly he realized his attitude was actually menacing. And toward dad—his own dad! “I beg your pardon, sir,” he muttered contritely. “I’m afraid I am forgetting myself. But please turn the talk.”
“Drop it, Dad!” Bob exclaimed. “We’ve never had an argument, but—” Suddenly, he realized his tone was actually threatening. And toward Dad—his own dad! “I’m sorry, sir,” he said quietly. “I’m afraid I’m losing my cool. But can we change the subject?”
“All right,” said dad. “I forgive you. I was only trying to elucidate your position. But since it’s not to be the matrimonial market, it’ll have to be a hustle, my boy. I’m too old to make another fortune. I’ve done my bit and now I’m going to retire on my son. Sounds fair and equitable, doesn’t it, Bob?”
“All right,” Dad said. “I forgive you. I was just trying to clarify your situation. But since it’s not going to be the marriage market, it’s going to have to be a hustle, my boy. I’m too old to make another fortune. I’ve done my part and now I’m going to rely on my son. Sounds fair and reasonable, doesn’t it, Bob?”
“I’d hate to contradict you, sir,” the other answered moodily.
“I really don't want to disagree with you, sir,” the other replied with a sullen attitude.
Dad walked up to him and laid an arm affectionately upon son’s broad shoulders. “I’ve the utmost confidence in you, my boy,” he said, with a bland smile.
Dad walked up to him and put an arm affectionately around his son’s broad shoulders. “I have complete confidence in you, my boy,” he said, with a friendly smile.
“Thank you, sir,” replied Bob. He always preserved an attitude of filial respect toward his one and only parent. But he tore himself away from dad now as soon as he could. He wanted to think. The average hero, thrust out into the world, has only a single load to carry. He has only to earn a living for himself. Bob’s load was a double one and therefore he would have to be a double hero. Mechanically he walked on and on, cogitating upon his unenviable fate. Suddenly he stopped. He found himself in front of the club. Bob went in. And there he met Dickie, Clarence, Dan the doughty “commodore” and some others.
“Thanks, Dad,” Bob replied. He always showed a deep respect for his one and only parent. But he pulled away from his dad as soon as he could. He needed time to think. The typical hero, pushed out into the world, only has one burden to bear. He only needs to provide for himself. Bob's burden was twofold, so he would have to be a double hero. Mechanically, he walked on, pondering his unfortunate situation. Suddenly, he stopped. He found himself in front of the club. Bob went inside, and there he met Dickie, Clarence, Dan the brave “commodore,” and a few others.
That Impecunious Bob should have said “It could be done” to Imperial Dickie’s “It couldn’t” and have allowed himself to be drawn further into the affair was, in itself, an impertinence. For Dickie was a person of importance. He had a string of simoleons so long that a newspaper-mathematician once computed if you spread them out, touching one another, they would reach half around the world. Or was it twice around? Anyhow, Dickie didn’t have to worry about hustling, the way Bob did now. At the moment the latter was in a mood to contradict any one. He felt reckless. He was ready for almost anything—short of an imitation of that back-to-nature hero of a popular novel.
That broke Bob should have said “It could be done” to Imperial Dickie’s “It couldn’t” and let himself get drawn further into the situation was, in itself, pretty bold. Dickie was an important guy. He had so much money that a newspaper mathematician once figured out that if you laid them out end to end, they would stretch halfway around the world. Or was it twice around? Anyway, Dickie didn’t have to stress about hustling like Bob did now. At that moment, Bob was in a mood to argue with anyone. He felt daring. He was ready for almost anything—except for copying that back-to-nature hero from a popular book.
They had been going on about that “could” and “couldn’t” proposition for some time when some one staked Bob. That some one was promptly “called” by the “commodore”—as jolly a sea-dog as never trod a deck. Dan was a land-commodore, but he was very popular at the Yacht Club, where something besides waves seethed when he was around. He didn’t go often to the University Club where he complained things were too pedagogic. (No one else ever complained of that.) He liked to see the decks—or floors—wave. Then he was in his element and would issue orders with the blithe abandon of a son of Neptune. There was no delay in “clapping on sail” when the commodore was at the helm. And if he said: “Clear the decks for action,” there was action. When he did occasionally drift into the University, he brought with him the flavor of the sea. Things at once breezed up.
They had been discussing the “could” and “couldn’t” argument for a while when someone decided to stake Bob. That someone was quickly “called” by the “commodore”—the most cheerful sea captain you’d ever meet. Dan was a land-commodore, but he was really popular at the Yacht Club, where more than just waves stirred when he was around. He didn’t go to the University Club much because he thought it was too stuffy. (No one else ever complained about that.) He enjoyed seeing the decks—or floors—move. That’s when he was in his element, issuing orders with the carefree attitude of a son of Neptune. There was no hesitation in “clapping on sail” when the commodore was in charge. And if he said, “Clear the decks for action,” you could count on action. When he occasionally wandered into the University, he brought the vibe of the sea with him. Everything immediately perked up.
Well, the commodore called that some one quick.
Well, the commodore called for someone fast.
“Five thousand he can’t do it.”
“Five thousand he can't do it.”
“For how long?” says Dickie.
"How long?" says Dickie.
“A week,” answered the commodore.
"A week," replied the commodore.
“Make it two.”
"Make it a double."
“Oh, very well.”
“Oh, alright.”
“Three, if you like!” from Bob, the stormy petrel.
“Three, if you want!” from Bob, the stormy petrel.
They gazed at him admiringly.
They looked at him admiringly.
“It isn’t the green garden talking, is it, Bob?” asked Clarence Van Duzen whose sole occupation was being a director in a few corporations—or, more strictly speaking, not being one. It took almost all Clarence’s time to “direct” his wife, or try to.
“It isn’t the green garden talking, is it, Bob?” asked Clarence Van Duzen, whose only job was being a director in a few companies—or, more accurately, not being one. It took almost all of Clarence’s time to “direct” his wife, or at least try to.
Bob looked at Clarence reproachfully. “No,” he said. “I’m still master of all my thoughts.” Gloomily. “I couldn’t forget if I tried.”
Bob looked at Clarence with disappointment. “No,” he said. “I’m still in control of all my thoughts.” Gloomily. “I couldn’t forget even if I wanted to.”
“That’s all right, then,” said Dickie.
"Cool, then," said Dickie.
Then Clarence “took” some one else who staked Bob. And Dickie did likewise. And there was some more talk. And then Bob staked himself.
Then Clarence “took” someone else who backed Bob. And Dickie did the same. There was some more conversation. And then Bob backed himself.
“Little short of cash at the bank just now,” he observed. “But if you’ll take my note—”
“I'm a little short on cash at the bank right now,” he said. “But if you’ll accept my note—”
“Take your word if you want,” said the commodore.
“Take your word if you want,” said the commodore.
“No; here’s my note.” He gave it—a large amount—payable in thirty days. It was awful, but he did it. He hardly thought what he was doing. Having the utmost confidence he would win, he didn’t stop to realize what a large contract he was taking on. But Dan, Dickie, Clarence and the others did.
“No; here’s my note.” He handed it over—a big sum—due in thirty days. It was terrible, but he went through with it. He barely considered what he was doing. Confident that he would win, he didn’t stop to think about how big of a commitment he was making. But Dan, Dickie, Clarence, and the others did.
“Of course, you can’t go away and hide,” said Dickie to Bob with sudden suspicion.
“Of course, you can’t just leave and hide,” Dickie said to Bob, suddenly suspicious.
“No; you can’t do that,” from Clarence. “Or get yourself arrested and locked up for three weeks! That wouldn’t be fair, old chap.”
“No; you can’t do that,” Clarence said. “Or you’ll get yourself arrested and locked up for three weeks! That wouldn't be fair, buddy.”
“Bob understands he’s got to go on in the even tenor of his way,” said the commodore.
“Bob knows he has to keep moving forward on his path,” said the commodore.
Bob nodded. “Just as if nothing had happened!” he observed. “I’ll not seek, or I’ll not shirk. I’m on honor, you understand.”
Bob nodded. “Just like nothing happened!” he said. “I won't look away, and I won't back down. I'm on my honor, you know.”
“That’s good enough for me!” said Dickie. “Bob’s honest.”
"That's good enough for me!" said Dickie. "Bob's honest."
“And me!” from Clarence.
“And me!” from Clarence.
“And me!” from half a dozen other good souls, including the non-aqueous commodore.
“And me!” from half a dozen other kind people, including the non-water-loving commodore.
“Gentlemen, I thank you,” said Bob, affected by this outburst of confidence. “I thank you for this display of—this display—”
“Gentlemen, I appreciate it,” said Bob, moved by this show of confidence. “I thank you for this demonstration of—this demonstration—”
“Cut it!”
"Stop it!"
“Cork it up! And speaking of corks—”
“Shut it! And talking about corks—”
“When does it begin?” interrupted Bob.
"When does it start?" interrupted Bob.
“When you walk out of here,”
“When you step out of here,”
“At the front door?”
"At the front door?"
“When your foot touches the sidewalk, son.” The commodore who was about forty in years sometimes assumed the paternal.
“When your foot hits the sidewalk, son.” The commodore, who was about forty years old, sometimes took on a fatherly tone.
“Never mind the ‘son.’” Bob shuddered. “One father at a time, please!” And then hastily, not to seem ungracious: “I’ve got such a jolly good, real dad, you understand—”
“Forget about the ‘son.’” Bob shuddered. “One dad at a time, please!” And then quickly, not wanting to seem rude: “I’ve got such a fun, real dad, you know—”
The commodore dropped the paternal. “Well, lads, here’s a bumper to Bob,” he said.
The commodore dropped the fatherly tone. “Well, guys, here’s a toast to Bob,” he said.
“We see his finish.”
"We see his end."
“No doubt of that.”
"That's for sure."
“To Bob! Good old Bob! Ho! ho!”
“To Bob! Good old Bob! Haha!”
“Ha! ha!” said Bob funereally.
“Ha! Ha!” said Bob seriously.
Then he got up.
Then he stood up.
“Going?”
"Leaving?"
“Might as well.”
"Why not?"
The commodore drew out a watch.
The commodore took out a watch.
“Twelve minutes after three p.m. Monday, the twelfth of September, in the year of our Lord, 1813,” he said. “You are all witnesses of the time the ball was opened?”
“Twelve minutes after three p.m. on Monday, September 12, 1813,” he said. “You all saw the time the ball started?”
“We are.”
"We're."
“Good-by, Bob.”
“Goodbye, Bob.”
“Oh, let’s go with him a way!”
“Oh, let’s go with him for a bit!”
“Might be interesting,” from Clarence sardonically.
“Could be interesting,” from Clarence sardonically.
“It might. Least we can do is to see him start on his way rejoicing.”
“It might. The least we can do is to see him start on his way feeling happy.”
“That’s so. Come on.” Which they did.
“That’s right. Let’s go.” And they did.
Bob offered no objection. He didn’t much care at the time whether they did or not. What would happen would. He braced himself for the inevitable.
Bob didn’t say anything against it. At that moment, he was indifferent about whether they did or not. What would happen would happen. He prepared himself for the unavoidable.
CHAPTER II—A TRY-OUT
To tell the truth—to blurt out nothing but the truth to every one, and on every occasion, for three whole weeks—that’s what Bob had contracted to do. From the point of view of the commodore and the others, the man who tried to fill this contract would certainly be shot, or electrocuted, or ridden out of town on a rail, or receive a coat of tar and feathers. And Bob had such a wide circle of friends, too, which would make his task the harder; the handsome dog was popular. He was asked everywhere that was anywhere and he went, too. He would certainly “get his.” The jovial commodore was delighted. He would have a whole lot of fun at Bob’s expense. Wasn’t the latter the big boob, though? And wouldn’t he be put through his paces? Really it promised to be delicious. The commodore and the others went along with Bob just for a little try-out.
To be honest—to spill nothing but the truth to everyone, all the time, for three straight weeks—that’s what Bob agreed to do. From the perspective of the commodore and the rest, anyone who attempted to fulfill this promise would definitely face serious consequences, whether it be execution, electrocution, being run out of town on a rail, or getting a coat of tar and feathers. Plus, Bob had a huge circle of friends, which made his task even tougher; the charming guy was well-liked. He was invited everywhere that mattered and he accepted too. He was definitely in for it. The cheerful commodore was thrilled. He would have a blast at Bob’s expense. Wasn’t Bob just a big fool? And wasn’t he about to be put through the wringer? It really seemed like it would be entertaining. The commodore and the others went along with Bob just to test things out a bit.
At first nothing especially interesting happened. They walked without meeting any one they were acquainted with. Transients! transients! where did they all come from? Once on their progress down the avenue the hopes of Bob’s friends rose high. A car they knew got held up on a side street not far away from them. It was a gorgeous car and it had a gorgeous occupant, but a grocery wagon was between them and it. The commodore warbled blithely.
At first, nothing particularly interesting happened. They walked without running into anyone they knew. Strangers! Strangers! Where did they all come from? Once, as they moved down the avenue, Bob’s friends were filled with hope. A car they recognized was stuck on a side street not too far from them. It was an amazing car with a stunning driver, but a grocery wagon was in between them and it. The commodore sang cheerfully.
“Come on, Bob. Time for a word or two!”
“Hey, Bob. Let’s have a quick chat!”
But handsome Bob shook his head. “The ‘even tenor of his way,’” he quoted. “I don’t ordinarily go popping in and out between wheels like a rabbit. I’m not looking to commit suicide.”
But handsome Bob shook his head. “The ‘even tenor of his way,’” he quoted. “I don’t usually go jumping in and out between wheels like a rabbit. I’m not trying to commit suicide.”
“Oh, I only wanted to say: ‘How do you do,’” retorted the commodore rather sulkily. “Or ‘May I tango with you at tea this afternoon, Mrs. Ralston?’”
“Oh, I just wanted to say, ‘How do you do,’” the commodore replied somewhat sulkily. “Or ‘Can I tango with you at tea this afternoon, Mrs. Ralston?’”
“Or observe: ‘How young she looks to-day, eh, Bob?’” murmured that young gentleman suspiciously.
“Or check it out: ‘Doesn’t she look young today, huh, Bob?’” murmured that young guy suspiciously.
“Artful! Artful!” Clarence poked the commodore in the ribs. “Sly old sea-dog!”
“Clever! Clever!” Clarence nudged the commodore in the side. “Sly old sea-dog!”
“Well, let’s move on,” yawned Dickie. “Nothing doing here.”
“Well, let’s move on,” yawned Dickie. “Nothing happening here.”
“Wait!” The commodore had an idea. “Hi, you young grocery lad, back up a little, will you?”
“Wait!” The commodore had an idea. “Hey, you young grocery guy, could you back up a little, please?”
“Wha’ for?” said the boy, aggressive at once. Babes are born in New York with chips on their shoulders.
“Why?” said the boy, immediately defensive. Babies are born in New York with attitudes.
“As a matter of trifling accommodation, that is all,” answered the commodore sweetly. “On the other side of you is a stately car and we would hold conversation with—”
“As a matter of minor convenience, that’s all,” replied the commodore sweetly. “On the other side of you is an impressive car, and we would like to talk with—”
“Aw, gwan! Guess I got as much right to the street as it has.” And as a display of his “rights,” he even touched up his horse a few inches, to intervene more thoroughly.
“Aw, come on! I guess I have just as much right to the street as it does.” And to prove his “rights,” he even adjusted his horse a bit, to assert himself more fully.
“Perhaps now for half a dollar—” began the commodore, more insinuatingly. Then he groaned: “Too late!” The policeman had lifted the ban. The stately car turned into the avenue and was swallowed up amid a myriad of more or less imposing vehicles. They had, however, received a bow from the occupant. That was all there had been opportunity for. Incidentally, the small boy had bestowed upon them his parting compliments:
“Maybe now for fifty cents—” the commodore started, sounding more persuasive. Then he sighed: “Too late!” The policeman had lifted the restriction. The fancy car turned onto the avenue and disappeared among a multitude of more or less impressive vehicles. They had, however, received a nod from the person inside. That was all they had time for. By the way, the little boy had given them his farewell remarks:
“Smart old guy! You think youse—” The rest was jumbled up or lost in the usual cacophony of the thoroughfare.
“Smart old guy! You think you—” The rest was jumbled up or lost in the usual noise of the street.
“Too bad!” murmured the commodore. “But still these three weeks are young.”
“Too bad!” the commodore muttered. “But these three weeks are still new.”
“‘Three weeks!’” observed Dickie. “Sounds like plagiarism!”
“‘Three weeks!’” said Dickie. “That sounds like plagiarism!”
“Oh, Bob won’t have that kind of a ‘three weeks,’” snickered Clarence.
“Oh, Bob won’t have that kind of ‘three weeks,’” snickered Clarence.
“Bob’s will be an expurgated edition,” from the commodore, recovering his spirits.
“Bob's version will be a cleaned-up edition,” said the commodore, lifting his spirits.
“Maybe we ought to make it four?”
“Maybe we should make it four?”
“Three will do,” said Bob, who wasn’t enjoying this chaffing. Every one they approached he now eyed apprehensively.
“Three will do,” said Bob, who wasn’t having fun with this teasing. He now looked at everyone they approached with concern.
But he was a joy-giver, if not receiver, for his tall handsome figure attracted many admiring glances. His striking head with its blond curls—they weren’t exactly curls, only his hair wasn’t straight, but clung rather wavy-like to the bold contour of his head—his careless stride, and that general effect of young masculinity—all this caused sundry humble feminine hearts to go pit-a-pat. Bob’s progress, however, was generally followed by pit-a-pats from shop-girls and bonnet-bearers. Especially at the noon hour! Then Bob seemed to these humble toilers, like dessert, after hard-boiled eggs, stale sandwiches and pickles.
But he was a joy-giver, if not a receiver, because his tall, handsome figure attracted many admiring glances. His striking head with its blond curls—they weren’t exactly curls, just his hair wasn’t straight, but hung rather wavy-like against the bold contour of his head—his carefree stride, and that overall effect of young masculinity—all of this made various humble feminine hearts flutter. Bob’s presence, however, was usually accompanied by fluttering from shop-girls and bonnet-wearers. Especially around noon! To these hardworking women, Bob felt like dessert after a meal of hard-boiled eggs, stale sandwiches, and pickles.
But Bob was quite unaware of any approving glances cast after him. He was thinking, and thinking hard. He wasn’t so sanguine now as he had been when he had left the club. What might have happened at that street corner appealed to him with sudden poignant force. Mrs. Ralston was of the creme de la creme. She was determined to stay young. She pretended to be thirty years or so younger than she was. In fact, she was rather a ridiculous old lady who found it hard to conceal her age. Now what if the commodore had found opportunity to ask that awful question? Bob could have made only one reply and told the truth. The largeness of his contract was becoming more apparent to him. He began to see himself now from Dan’s standpoint. Incidentally, he was beginning to develop a great dislike for that genial land-mariner.
But Bob was completely unaware of any approving looks thrown his way. He was deep in thought, and thinking hard. He wasn’t as optimistic now as he had been when he left the club. The possibility of what might have happened at that street corner hit him with sudden intensity. Mrs. Ralston was among the elite. She was determined to remain youthful. She acted like she was around thirty years younger than she actually was. In reality, she was quite a ridiculous older woman who struggled to hide her age. Now, what if the commodore had the chance to ask that dreadful question? Bob could have only given one truthful answer. The significance of his contract was becoming clearer to him. He began to view himself now from Dan’s perspective. In the process, he was starting to develop a strong dislike for that friendly landlubber.
“How about the Waldorf?” They had paused at the corner of Thirty-fourth Street. “May find some one there,” suggested Clarence.
“How about the Waldorf?” They stopped at the corner of Thirty-fourth Street. “We might find someone there,” suggested Clarence.
“In Peek-a-Boo Alley?” scornfully from Dickie.
“In Peek-a-Boo Alley?” Dickie said scornfully.
“Oh, I heard there was a concert, or something upstairs,” said Clarence. “In that you’ve-got-to-be-introduced room! And some of the real people have to walk through to get to it.”
“Oh, I heard there’s a concert or something happening upstairs,” said Clarence. “In that you-have-to-be-introduced room! And some of the important people have to walk through to get to it.”
Accordingly they entered the Waldorf and the commodore hustled them up and down and around, without, however, their encountering a single “real” person. There were only people present—loads of them, not from somewhere but from everywhere. They did the circuit several times, still without catching sight of a real person.
Accordingly, they entered the Waldorf, and the commodore hurried them up, down, and around, without them encountering a single “real” person. There were only people present—loads of them, not from somewhere but from everywhere. They did the circuit several times, still without catching sight of a real person.
“Whew! This is a lonesome place!” breathed the commodore at last.
“Wow! This is a lonely place!” the commodore finally exclaimed.
“Let’s depart!” disgustedly from Clarence. “Apologize for steering you into these barren wastes!”
“Let’s get out of here!” Clarence said in disgust. “I’m sorry for leading you into this desolate place!”
“What’s your hurry?” said Bob, with a little more bravado. Then suddenly he forgot about those other three. His entranced gaze became focused on one. He saw only her.
“What’s your hurry?” Bob asked, a bit more confidently. Then he suddenly lost sight of the other three. His captivated gaze zeroed in on one. He only saw her.
“Ha!” The commodore’s quick glance, following Bob’s, caught sight, too, of that wonderful face in the distance—the stunning, glowing young figure—that regal dream of just-budded girlhood—that superb vision in a lovely afternoon gown! She was followed by one or two others. One could only imagine her leading. There would, of course, always be several at her either side and quite a number dangling behind. Her lips were like the red rosebuds that swung negligently from her hand as she floated through the crowd. Her eyes suggested veiled dreams amid the confusion and hubbub of a topsyturvy world. She was like something rhythmical precipitated amid chaos. A far-away impression of a smile played around the corners of her proud lips.
“Ha!” The commodore’s quick glance, following Bob’s, caught sight of that amazing face in the distance—the stunning, radiant young figure—that majestic vision of blossoming girlhood—that gorgeous sight in a lovely afternoon dress! She was followed by one or two others. One could only picture her leading. There would, of course, always be several on either side and quite a few trailing behind. Her lips were like the red rosebuds that hung carelessly from her hand as she glided through the crowd. Her eyes hinted at hidden dreams amid the chaos and noise of a topsy-turvy world. She was like something rhythmic emerging from disorder. A distant hint of a smile played at the corners of her proud lips.
The commodore precipitated himself in her direction. Bob put out a hand as if to grasp him by the coat tails, but the other was already beyond reach and Bob’s hand fell to his side. He stood passive. That was his part. Only he wasn’t passive inwardly. His heart was beating wildly. He could imagine himself with her and them—those others in her train—and the conversation that would ensue, for he had no doubt of the commodore’s intentions. Dan was an adept at rounding up people. Bob could see himself at a table participating in the conversation—prepared conversation, some of it! He could imagine the commodore leading little rivulets of talk into certain channels for his benefit. Dan would see to it that they would ask him (Bob) questions, embarrassing ones. That “advice” dad had given him weighed on Bob like a nightmare. Suppose—ghastly thought!—truth compelled him ever to speak of that? And to her! A shiver ran down Bob’s backbone. Nearer she drew—nearer—while Bob gazed as if fascinated, full of rapturous, paradoxical dread. Now the commodore was almost upon her when—
The commodore rushed toward her. Bob reached out as if to grab him by the coat tails, but the other was already out of reach, and Bob’s hand fell to his side. He stood there, passive. That was his role. But inside, he wasn’t passive at all. His heart was racing. He could picture himself with her and those others in her circle—and the conversation that would follow, because he had no doubt about the commodore’s intentions. Dan was great at gathering people. Bob could see himself at a table, engaged in the conversation—planned conversation, some of it! He could envision the commodore guiding little streams of discussion in certain directions for his benefit. Dan would make sure they asked him (Bob) questions, awkward ones. That “advice” Dad had given him felt like a nightmare weighing on him. What if—horrible thought!—the truth forced him to ever speak of that? And to her! A chill ran down Bob’s spine. She drew closer—closer—while Bob stared, almost entranced, filled with a mix of excitement and fear. The commodore was nearly upon her when—
Ah, what was that? An open elevator?—people going in?—She, too,—those with her—Yes—click! a closed door! The radiant vision had vanished, was going upward; Bob breathed again. Think of being even paradoxically glad at witnessing her disappear! Bob ceased now to think; stood as in a trance.
Ah, what was that? An open elevator?—people getting in?—She, too,—those with her—Yes—click! a closed door! The bright vision had vanished, was going up; Bob breathed again. Can you believe he felt even strangely happy to see her disappear! Bob stopped thinking now; he stood there as if in a trance.
“Why do people go to concerts?” said the commodore in aggrieved tones. “Some queen, that!”
“Why do people go to concerts?” said the commodore in annoyed tones. “What a character!”
“And got the rocks—or stocks!” from Dickie. “Owns about three of those railroads that are going a-begging nowadays.”
“Got the connections—or shares!” said Dickie. “Owns about three of those railroads that are struggling to find buyers these days.”
“Wake up, Bobbie!” some one now addressed that abstracted individual.
“Wake up, Bobbie!” someone now called to that distracted person.
Bob shook himself.
Bob shook it off.
“Old friend of yours, Miss Gwendoline Gerald, I believe?” said the commodore significantly.
“Isn’t that your old friend, Miss Gwendoline Gerald?” the commodore said with emphasis.
“Yes; I’ve known Miss Gerald for some time,” said Bob coldly.
“Yes; I’ve known Miss Gerald for a while,” Bob said coolly.
“‘Known for some time’—” mimicked the commodore. “Phlegmatic dog! Well, what shall we do now?”
“‘Known for a while’—” the commodore imitated. “Calm dog! So, what should we do now?”
“Hang around until the concert’s over?” suggested Dickie.
"Stick around until the concert's over?" suggested Dickie.
“Hang around nothing!” said the commodore. “It’s one of those classical high-jinks.” Disgustedly. “Lasts so late the sufferers haven’t time for anything after it’s over. Just enough energy left to stagger to their cars and fall over in a comatose condition.”
“Don’t waste your time!” said the commodore. “It’s just one of those classic antics.” He said this with disgust. “It goes on so late that the people involved don’t have time for anything afterward. They’re left with just enough energy to stumble to their cars and collapse in a daze.”
“Suppose we could go to the bar?”
"How about we go to the bar?"
“Naughty! Naughty!” A sprightly voice interrupted.
“Naughty! Naughty!” A lively voice interrupted.
The commodore wheeled. “Mrs. Ralston!” he exclaimed gladly.
The commodore turned around. “Mrs. Ralston!” he said happily.
It was the gorgeous lady of the gorgeous car.
It was the beautiful woman in the beautiful car.
“Just finished my shopping and thought I’d have a look in here,” she said vivaciously.
“Just finished my shopping and thought I’d check this place out,” she said excitedly.
“Concert, I suppose?” from the commodore, jubilantly.
“Concert, I guess?” the commodore said cheerfully.
“Yes. Dubussy. Don’t you adore Dubussy?” with schoolgirlish enthusiasm. Though almost sixty, she had the manners of a “just-come-out.”
“Yes. Debussy. Don’t you just love Debussy?” she said with schoolgirl enthusiasm. Even though she was almost sixty, she had the manners of someone just making her debut.
“Nothing like it,” lied the commodore.
“Nothing like it,” the commodore lied.
“Ah, then you, too, are a modern?” gushed the lady.
“Ah, so you’re a modern, too?” the lady exclaimed.
“I’m so advanced,” said the commodore, “I can’t keep up with myself.”
“I’m so advanced,” said the commodore, “I can’t keep up with myself.”
They laughed. “Ah, silly man!” said the lady’s eyes. Bob gazed at her and the commodore enviously. Oh, to be able once more to prevaricate like that! The commodore had never heard Dubussy in his life. Ragtime and merry hornpipes were his limits. And Mrs. Ralston was going to the concert, it is true, but to hear the music? Ah, no! Her box was a fashionable rendezvous, and from it she could study modernity in hats. Therein, at least, she was a modern of the moderns. She was so advanced, the styles had fairly to trot, or turkey-trot, to keep up with her.
They laughed. “Oh, silly man!” said the lady’s eyes. Bob looked at her and the commodore with envy. Oh, to be able to dodge the truth like that again! The commodore had never listened to Dubussy in his life. Ragtime and happy hornpipes were his thing. And it was true that Mrs. Ralston was going to the concert, but was she going to actually listen to the music? Oh, no! Her box was a trendy meeting spot, and from there she could observe the latest hat styles. In that area, she was definitely a modern trendsetter. She was so ahead of the curve that the styles had to practically rush, or do the turkey trot, to keep up with her.
“Well,” she said, with that approving glance women usually bestowed upon Bob, “I suppose I mustn’t detain you busy people after that remark I overheard.”
“Well,” she said, with that approving look women usually gave Bob, “I guess I shouldn’t keep you busy people after that comment I overheard.”
“Oh, don’t hurry,” said the commodore hastily. “Between old friends— But I say— By jove, you are looking well. Never saw you looking so young and charming. Never!” It was rather crudely done, but the commodore could say things more bluntly than other people and “get away with them.” He was rather a privileged character. Bob began to breathe hard, having a foretaste of what was to follow. And Mrs. “Willie” Ralston was Miss Gwendoline Gerald’s aunt! No doubt that young lady was up in her aunt’s box at this moment.
“Oh, don’t rush,” the commodore said quickly. “Between old friends— But I must say— Wow, you look great. I’ve never seen you look so youthful and charming. Never!” It was a bit blunt, but the commodore could say things more directly than others and “get away with it.” He was somewhat of a privileged character. Bob started to breathe heavily, anticipating what was about to happen next. And Mrs. “Willie” Ralston was Miss Gwendoline Gerald’s aunt! No doubt that young lady was up in her aunt’s box right now.
“Never!” repeated the commodore. “Eh, Bob? Doesn’t look a day over thirty,” with a jovial, freehearted sailor laugh. “Does she now?”
“Never!” the commodore said again. “Eh, Bob? Doesn’t look a day over thirty,” he laughed with a cheerful, carefree sailor’s laugh. “Does she now?”
It had come. That first test! And the question had to be answered. The lady was looking at Bob. They were all waiting. A fraction of a second, or so, which seemed like a geological epoch, Bob hesitated. He had to reply and yet being a gentleman, how could he? No matter what it cost him, he would simply have to “lie like a gentleman.” He—
It had arrived. That first test! And the question needed to be answered. The woman was looking at Bob. They were all waiting. For what felt like an eternity, Bob hesitated for just a moment. He had to respond, and yet being a gentleman, how could he? No matter the consequence, he would just have to “lie like a gentleman.” He—
Suddenly an idea shot through his befuddled brain. Maybe Mrs. Ralston wouldn’t know what he said, if he—? She had been numerous times to France, of course, but she was not mentally a heavy-weight. Languages might not be her forte. Presumably she had all she could do to chatter in English. Bob didn’t know much French himself. He would take a chance on her, however. He made a bow which was Chesterfieldian and incidentally made answer, rattling it off with the swiftness of a boulevardier.
Suddenly, an idea flashed through his confused mind. Maybe Mrs. Ralston wouldn’t understand what he said if he—? She had been to France several times, of course, but she wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. Languages might not be her strong suit. She probably struggled just to chat in English. Bob didn’t know much French either. Still, he decided to take a chance on her. He bowed in a very stylish way and casually replied, saying it all with the quickness of someone who was used to the streets.
“Il me faut dire que, vraiment, Madame Ralston parait aussi agee qu’elle l’est!” (“I am obliged to say that Mrs. Ralston appears as old as she is!”)
“I must say that Mrs. Ralston looks just as old as she actually is!”
Then he straightened as if he had just delivered a stunning compliment.
Then he straightened up as if he had just given an amazing compliment.
“Merci!” The lady smiled. She also beamed. “How well you speak French, Mr. Bennett!”
“Thank you!” The lady smiled. She also beamed. “You speak French so well, Mr. Bennett!”
The commodore nearly exploded. He understood French.
The commodore almost exploded. He understood French.
Bob expanded, beginning to breathe freely once more. “Language of courtiers and diplomats!” he mumbled.
Bob expanded, starting to breathe easily again. “Language of courtiers and diplomats!” he muttered.
Mrs. Ralston shook an admonishing finger at him. “Flatterer!” she said, and departed.
Mrs. Ralston pointed a warning finger at him. “Flatterer!” she said, and walked away.
Whereupon the commodore leaned weakly against Dickie while Clarence sank into a chair. First round for Bob!
Whereupon the commodore leaned weakly against Dickie while Clarence slumped into a chair. First round for Bob!
The commodore was the first to recover. His voice was reproachful. “Was that quite fair?—that parleyvoo business? I don’t know about it’s being allowed.”
The commodore was the first to recover. His voice was critical. “Was that really fair?—that parleyvoo thing? I’m not sure if it’s allowed.”
“Why not?” calmly from Bob. “Is truth confined to one tongue?”
“Why not?” Bob said calmly. “Is truth limited to just one language?”
“But what about that ‘even tenor of your way’?” fenced the commodore. “You don’t, as a usual thing, go around parleyvooing—”
“But what about that ‘even tenor of your way’?” fenced the commodore. “You don’t usually go around chatting—”
“What about the even tenor of your own ways?” retorted Bob.
“What about the smoothness of your own life?” retorted Bob.
“Nothing said about that when we—”
“Nothing said about that when we—”
“No, but—how can I go the even tenor, if you don’t go yours?”
“No, but—how can I keep things steady if you don’t do the same?”
“Hum?” said the commodore.
“Uh?” said the commodore.
“Don’t you see it’s not the even tenor?” persisted Bob. “But it’s your fault if it isn’t.”
“Don’t you see it’s not the same calm?” Bob insisted. “But it’s your fault if it isn’t.”
“Some logic in that,” observed Clarence.
"There's some logic to that," Clarence noted.
“Maybe, we have been a bit too previous,” conceded the commodore.
“Maybe we have been a bit too hasty,” conceded the commodore.
“That isn’t precisely the adjective I would use,” returned Bob. He found himself thinking more clearly now. They had all, perhaps, been stepping rather lightly when they had left the club. He should have thought of this before. But Bob’s brain moved rather slowly sometimes and the others had been too bent on having a good time to consider all the ethics of the case. They showed themselves fair-minded enough now, however.
“That’s not exactly the word I would use,” Bob replied. He realized he was starting to think more clearly. They had all probably been a bit careless when they left the club. He should have thought about this sooner. But Bob’s mind sometimes worked slowly, and the others had been too focused on having fun to think about all the ethical aspects of the situation. They were being open-minded enough now, though.
“Bob’s right,” said the commodore sorrowfully. “Suppose we’ve got to eliminate ourselves from his agreeable company for the next three weeks, unless we just naturally happen to meet. We’ll miss a lot of fun, but I guess it’s just got to be. What about that parleyvooing business though, Bob?”
“Bob’s right,” the commodore said sadly. “I guess we have to remove ourselves from his pleasant company for the next three weeks, unless we just run into him. We’ll miss out on a lot of fun, but I suppose it’s how it has to be. What about that parleyvooing thing, though, Bob?”
“That’s got to be eliminated, too!” from Dickie. “Why, he might tell the truth in Chinese.”
“That needs to go, too!” said Dickie. “Why, he might actually tell the truth in Chinese.”
“All right, fellows,” said Bob shortly. “You quit tagging and I’ll talk United States.”
“All right, guys,” Bob said briefly. “You stop messing around and I’ll speak American.”
“Good. I’m off,” said the commodore. And he went. The others followed. Bob was left alone. He found the solitude blessed and began to have hopes once more. Why, he might even be permitted to enjoy a real lonely three weeks, now that he had got rid of that trio. He drew out a cigar and began to tell himself he was enjoying himself when—
“Great. I’m leaving,” said the commodore. And he went. The others followed. Bob was left alone. He found the solitude refreshing and started to feel hopeful again. Why, he might even get to enjoy a real three weeks of peace now that he had gotten rid of that trio. He pulled out a cigar and started to convince himself he was enjoying himself when—
“Mr. Robert Bennett!” The voice of a page smote the air. It broke into his reflections like a shock.
“Mr. Robert Bennett!” A page's voice cut through the air. It interrupted his thoughts like a jolt.
“Mr. Bennett!” again bawled the voice.
“Mr. Bennett!” the voice shouted again.
For the moment Bob was tempted to let him slip by, but conscience wouldn’t let him. He lifted a finger.
For a moment, Bob was tempted to let him pass, but his conscience wouldn't allow it. He raised a finger.
“Message for Mr. Bennett,” said the urchin.
“Message for Mr. Bennett,” said the kid.
Bob took it. He experienced forebodings as he saw the dainty card and inscription. He read it. Then he groaned. Would Mr. Robert Bennett join Mrs. Ralston’s house-party at Tonkton? There were a few more words in that impulsive lady’s characteristic, vivacious style. And then there were two words in another handwriting that he knew. “Will you?” That “Will you?” wasn’t signed. Bob stared at it. Would he? He had to. He was in honor bound, because ordinarily he would have accepted with alacrity. But a house-party for him, under present circumstances! He would be a merry guest. Ye gods and little fishes! And then some! He gave a hollow laugh, while the urchin gazed at him sympathetically. Evidently the gentleman had received bad news.
Bob took it. He felt a sense of dread as he looked at the elegant card and inscription. He read it. Then he groaned. Would Mr. Robert Bennett join Mrs. Ralston’s house party at Tonkton? There were a few more words in that impulsive lady’s lively style. And then there were two words in another handwriting he recognized. “Will you?” That “Will you?” wasn’t signed. Bob stared at it. Would he? He had to. He was honor-bound because usually, he would have accepted eagerly. But a house party for him, given the current situation! He would be a cheerful guest. Good grief! And then some! He let out a hollow laugh while the young boy looked at him sympathetically. Clearly, the gentleman had received bad news.
CHAPTER III—AN INAUSPICIOUS BEGINNING
Mrs. Ralston’s house-parties were usually satisfactory affairs. She was fond of people, especially young people, and more especially of young men of the Apollo variety, though in a strictly proper, platonic and critical sense. Indeed, her taste in the abstract, for animated Praxiteles had, for well-nigh two-score of years, been unimpeachable. At the big gatherings in her noble country mansion, there was always a liberal sprinkling of decorative and animated objects of art of this description. She liked to ornament her porches or her gardens with husky and handsome young college athletes. She had an intuitive artistic taste for stunning living-statuary, “dressed up,” of course. Bob came distinctly in that category. So behold him then, one fine morning, on the little sawed-off train that whisked common people—and sometimes a few notables when their cars were otherwise engaged—countryward. Bob had a big grip by his side, his golf sticks were in a rack and he had a newspaper in his hand. The sunshine came in on him but his mood was not sunny. An interview with dad just before leaving hadn’t improved his spirits. He had found dad at the breakfast table examining a book of artificial flies, on one hand, and a big reel on the other.
Mrs. Ralston’s house parties were usually enjoyable events. She loved being around people, especially young people, and especially young men who looked like Adonis, though in a strictly proper, platonic, and critical way. In fact, for almost twenty years, her taste for lively works of art had been impeccable. At the large gatherings in her beautiful country mansion, there was always a good mix of striking and lively art objects of this kind. She liked to decorate her porches or gardens with strong and handsome college athletes. She had a natural artistic eye for stunning living statues, "dressed up," of course. Bob definitely fit this description. So there he was one fine morning, on the little train that whisked regular folks—and occasionally a few notables when their cars were otherwise occupied—out to the country. Bob had a big suitcase beside him, his golf clubs were in a rack, and he was holding a newspaper. The sunlight was coming in on him, but he wasn't in a good mood. An interview with his dad just before he left hadn’t lifted his spirits. He had found his dad at the breakfast table looking at a book of artificial flies in one hand and a big reel in the other.
“Which shall it be, my son?” dad had greeted him cordially. “Trout or tarpon?”
“Which one do you want, son?” Dad asked him warmly. “Trout or tarpon?”
“I guess that’s for you to decide,” Robert had answered grumpily. Dad, in his new role, was beginning to get on Bob’s nerves. Dad didn’t seem to be at all concerned about his future. He shifted that weighty and momentous subject just as lightly! He acted as if he hadn’t a care in the world.
“I guess that’s for you to decide,” Robert responded with annoyance. Dad, in his new role, was starting to irritate Bob. Dad didn’t seem concerned at all about his future. He brushed off that important topic so easily! He acted like he had no worries at all.
“Wish I could make up my mind,” he said, like a boy in some doubt how he can best put in his time when he plays hooky. “Minnows or whales? I’ll toss up.” He did. “Whales win. By the way, how’s the hustling coming on?”
“Wish I could make up my mind,” he said, like a boy unsure about how to spend his time when he’s skipping school. “Minnows or whales? I’ll flip a coin.” He did. “Whales win. By the way, how’s the hustling going?”
“Don’t know.”
"Not sure."
“Well, don’t put it off too long.” Cheerfully. “I guess I can worry along for about three weeks.”
“Well, don’t wait too long.” Cheerfully. “I guess I can manage to worry for about three weeks.”
“Three weeks!” said Bob gloomily. Oh, that familiar sound!
“Three weeks!” said Bob gloomily. Oh, that familiar sound!
“You wouldn’t have me stint myself, would you, my son?” Half reproachfully. “You wouldn’t have dad deny himself anything?”
“You wouldn’t want me to hold back, would you, my son?” she said, half reproachfully. “You wouldn’t want dad to deny himself anything?”
“No,” answered the other truthfully enough. As a matter of fact things couldn’t be much worse, so he didn’t much care. Fortunately, dad didn’t ask any questions or show any curiosity about that “hustling” business. He seemed to take it for granted Bob would arise to the occasion and be as indulgent a son as he had been an indulgent dad—for he had never denied the boy anything. Bob softened when he thought of that. But confound dad’s childlike faith in him, at this period of emergency. It made Bob nervous. He had no faith in himself that way. Dad did lift his eyebrows just a little when Bob brought down his big grip.
“No,” the other replied honestly enough. In fact, things couldn’t get much worse, so he didn’t really care. Luckily, dad didn’t ask any questions or show any curiosity about that “hustling” stuff. He seemed to assume Bob would rise to the occasion and be as understanding a son as he had been a lenient dad—after all, he had never denied the boy anything. Bob felt a warmth when he thought about that. But damn dad’s childlike faith in him during this crisis. It made Bob anxious. He had no confidence in himself like that. Dad *did* raise his eyebrows slightly when Bob brought down his big suitcase.
“Week-end?” he hazarded.
"Weekend?" he guessed.
“Whole week,” replied Bob in a melancholy tone.
“Whole week,” Bob replied, sounding sad.
“Whither?”
“Where to?”
“Tonkton.”
“Tonkton.”
Dad beamed. “Mrs. Ralston?”
Dad smiled. “Mrs. Ralston?”
“Yes.”
“Yeah.”
“Aunt of Miss Gwendoline Gerald, I believe?” With a quick penetrating glance at Bob.
“Aunt of Miss Gwendoline Gerald, right?” With a swift, sharp look at Bob.
“Yes.”
"Yep."
“Sensible boy,” observed dad, still studying him.
“Sensible kid,” dad remarked, still watching him.
“Oh, I’m not going for the reason you think,” said Bob quite savagely. He was most unlike himself.
“Oh, I'm not going for the reason you think,” Bob replied sharply. He was nothing like his usual self.
“Of course not.” Dad was conciliatory.
“Of course not.” Dad was understanding.
“I’m not. Think what you like.”
“I’m not. Think whatever you want.”
“Too much work to think,” yawned dad.
“It's too much work to think,” dad yawned.
“But you are thinking.” Resentfully.
“But you are thinking.” Bitterly.
“Have it your own way.”
"Have it your way."
Bob squared his shoulders. “You want to know really why I’m going to Tonkton?”
Bob squared his shoulders. “You really want to know why I’m going to Tonkton?”
“Have I ever tried to force your confidences, my son?”
“Have I ever tried to make you share your secrets, my son?”
“I’m going because I’ve got to. I can’t help myself.”
“I’m going because I have to. I can’t stop myself.”
“Of course,” said dad. “Ta! ta! Enjoy yourself. See you in three weeks.”
“Sure,” said Dad. “Take care! Have fun. See you in three weeks.”
“Three—!” But Bob didn’t finish. What was the use? Dad thought he was going to Tonkton because Miss Gerald might be there.
“Three—!” But Bob didn’t finish. What was the point? Dad thought he was going to Tonkton because Miss Gerald might be there.
As a matter of fact Bob’s one great wish now was that she wouldn’t be there. He wanted, and yet didn’t want, to see her. What had he to hope now? Why, he didn’t have a son, or not enough of them to count. He was to all practical intents and purposes a pauper. Dad’s “going broke” had changed his whole life. He had been reared in the lap of luxury, a pampered son. He had never dreamed of being otherwise. And considering himself a favored child of fortune, he had even dared entertain the delirious hope of winning her—her, the goddess of his dreams.
Actually, Bob's biggest wish right now was that she wouldn’t be there. He wanted to see her, but at the same time, he didn’t. What was there for him to hope for now? Well, he didn’t have a son, or at least not enough of them to count. He was practically a beggar. Dad's “going broke” had completely changed his life. He was raised in luxury, a spoiled son. He had never imagined things could be any different. And thinking of himself as a lucky child of fortune, he had even dared to dream of winning her over—her, the goddess of his dreams.
But hope now was gone. Regrets were useless. He could no longer conceive himself in the role of suitor. Why, there were few girls in the whole land so overburdened with “rocks”—as Dickie called them! If only she didn’t have those rocks—or stocks! “Impecunious Gwendoline!” How well that would go with “Impecunious Bob!” If only her trustees would hit the toboggan, the way dad did! But trustees don’t go tobogganing. They eschew the smooth and slippery. They speculate in government bonds and things that fluctuate about a point or so a century. No chance for quick action there! On the contrary, the trustees were probably making those millions grow. Bob heaved a sigh. Then he took something white from his pocket and gazed at two words, ardently yet dubiously.
But hope was gone now. Regrets were pointless. He could no longer picture himself as a suitor. There were hardly any girls in the entire land so weighed down with "rocks"—as Dickie called them! If only she didn’t have those rocks—or stocks! "Broke Gwendoline!" That would pair nicely with "Broke Bob!" If only her trustees would lose their minds, like Dad did! But trustees don’t take risks. They avoid the smooth and slippery. They invest in government bonds and things that barely change over decades. No chance for quick action there! In fact, the trustees were probably making those millions grow. Bob sighed. Then he pulled something white from his pocket and looked at two words, both passionately and uncertainly.
That “Will you?” of hers on Mrs. Ralston’s card exhilarated and at the same time depressed him. It implied she, herself, did expect to be at her aunt’s country place. He attached no other especial importance to the “Will you?” An imperious young person in her exalted position could command as she pleased. She could say “Will you?” or “You will” to dozens of more or less callow youths, or young grown-ups, with impunity, and none of said dozens would attach any undue flattering meaning to her words. Miss Gerald found safety in numbers. She was as yet heart-free.
That “Will you?” from Mrs. Ralston’s card excited him but also brought him down. It meant that she actually expected to be at her aunt’s country house. He didn’t read much more into the “Will you?” A confident young woman in her privileged position could command attention as she wanted. She could say “Will you?” or “You will” to plenty of naive young men or young adults without consequence, and none of them would take her words too seriously. Miss Gerald felt secure in the crowd. She was still free from romantic attachments.
“Can you—aw!—tell me how far it is to Tonkton?” a voice behind here interrupted his ruminations.
“Can you—ow!—tell me how far it is to Tonkton?” a voice behind her interrupted his thoughts.
Bob hastily returned the card to his pocket, and glancing back, saw a monocle. “Matter of ten miles or so,” he responded curtly. He didn’t like monocles.
Bob quickly shoved the card back into his pocket and, looking over his shoulder, noticed a monocle. “About ten miles or so,” he replied sharply. He wasn't a fan of monocles.
“Aw!” said the man.
"Wow!" said the man.
Bob picked up his newspaper that he had laid down, and frowningly began to glance over the head-lines. The man behind him glanced over them, too.
Bob picked up the newspaper he had set down and, frowning, started to skim the headlines. The man behind him looked over them as well.
“Another society robbery, I see,” the latter remarked. “No function complete without them nowadays, I understand. Wonderful country, America! Guests here always expect—aw!—to be robbed, I’ve been told.”
“Another robbery in society, I see,” the latter said. “No event is complete without them these days, I get it. What a wonderful country, America! Guests here always expect—oh!—to be robbed, I’ve heard.”
“Have the paper,” said Bob with cutting accents.
“Take the paper,” Bob said sharply.
“Thanks awfully.” The man with the monocle took the paper as a matter of course, seeming totally unaware of the sarcasm in Bob’s tone. At first, Bob felt like kicking himself; the rustle of the paper in those alien hands caused him to shuffle his feet with mild irritation. Then he forgot all about the paper and the monocle man. His thoughts began once more to go over and over the same old ground, until—
“Thanks a lot.” The man with the monocle took the paper as if it were nothing special, completely oblivious to the sarcasm in Bob’s voice. At first, Bob felt annoyed with himself; the sound of the paper in those unfamiliar hands made him shift his feet in slight irritation. Then he forgot all about the paper and the monocle guy. His thoughts started to circle back to the same old issues, until—
“T’nk’n!” The stentorian abbreviation of the conductor made Bob get up with a start. Grabbing his grip—hardly any weight at all for his muscular arm—in one hand, and his implements of the game in the other, he swung down the aisle and on to the platform. A good many people got off, for a small town nestled beneath the high rolling lands of the country estates of the affluent. There were vehicles of all kinds at the station, among them a number of cars, and in one of the latter Bob recognized Mrs. Ralston’s chauffeur.
“T’nk’n!” The loud call from the conductor made Bob jump up suddenly. He grabbed his bag—lightweight for his strong arm—with one hand and his game equipment with the other, then made his way down the aisle and onto the platform. A lot of people got off, as it was a small town located beneath the high rolling hills of the country estates of the wealthy. There were all kinds of vehicles at the station, including several cars, and in one of them, Bob recognized Mrs. Ralston’s chauffeur.
A moment he hesitated. He supposed he ought to step forward and get in, for that was what he naturally would do. But he wanted to think; he didn’t want to get to the house in a hurry. Still he had to do what he naturally would do and he started to do it when some other people Bob didn’t know—prospective guests, presumably, among them the man with the monocle—got into the car and fairly filled it. That let Bob out nicely and naturally. It gave him another breathing spell. He had got so he was looking forward to these little breathing spells.
A moment he hesitated. He thought he should step forward and get in, since that's what he would normally do. But he wanted to think; he didn’t want to rush to the house. Still, he needed to do what felt natural, and he began to do it when some other people Bob didn’t know—presumably prospective guests, including the man with the monocle—got into the car and pretty much filled it. That made it easy for Bob to back out. It gave him another moment to breathe. He had come to look forward to these little breaks.
“Hack, sir?” said a voice.
“Hack, sir?” said a voice.
“Not for me,” replied Bob. “But you can tote this up the hill,” indicating the grip. “Ralston house.”
“Not for me,” replied Bob. “But you can carry this up the hill,” pointing to the grip. “Ralston house.”
“Dollar and a half, sir,” said the man. “Same price if you go along, too.”
“Dollar and a half, sir,” the man said. “It’s the same price if you come along, too.”
“What?” It just occurred to Bob he hadn’t many dollars left, and of course, tips would be expected up there, at the big house. It behooved him, therefore, to be frugal. But to argue about a dollar and a half!—he, a guest at the several million dollar house! On the other hand, that dollar looked large to Bob at this moment. Imagine if he had to earn a dollar and a half! He couldn’t at the moment tell how he would do it.
“What?” Bob suddenly realized he didn't have many dollars left, and of course, tips would be expected up there at the big house. He really needed to be careful with his money. But to argue over a dollar and a half!—he, a guest at a several million dollar house! On the other hand, that dollar felt huge to Bob at that moment. Just think about having to earn a dollar and a half! He had no idea how he would manage that right now.
“Hold on.” Bob took the grip away from the man. “Why, it’s outrageous, such a tariff! Same price, with or without me, indeed! I tell you—” Suddenly he stopped. He had an awful realization that he was acting a part. That forced indignation of his was not the truth; that aloof kind of an attitude wasn’t the truth, either.
“Hold on.” Bob removed the grip from the man. “Why, this is outrageous, such a fee! Same price, whether I’m here or not, really! I’m telling you—” Suddenly he stopped. He had a terrible realization that he was playing a role. That forced anger wasn’t the truth; that distant attitude wasn’t the truth, either.
“To tell you the truth,” said Bob, “I can’t afford it.”
“To be honest with you,” Bob said, “I can’t afford it.”
“Can’t afford. Ha! ha!” That was a joke. One of Mrs. Ralston’s guests, not afford—!
“Can’t afford. Ha! ha!” That was a joke. One of Mrs. Ralston’s guests, not afford—!
“No,” said Bob. “I’ve only got about fifteen dollars and a half to my name. I guess you’re worth more than that yourself, aren’t you?” With sudden respect in his tone.
“No,” Bob said. “I’ve only got about fifteen dollars and fifty cents to my name. I guess you’re worth more than that yourself, right?” His tone shifted to one of sudden respect.
“I guess I am,” said the man, grinning.
“I guess I am,” said the man, grinning.
“Then, logically, I should be carrying your valise,” retorted Bob.
“Then, logically, I should be carrying your suitcase,” Bob shot back.
“Ha! ha! That’s good.” The fellow had been transporting the overflow of Mrs. Ralston’s guests for years, but he had never met quite such an eccentric one as this. He chuckled now as if it were the best joke. “I’ll tell you what—I’ll take it for nothing, and leave it to you what you give me!” Maybe, for a joke, he’d get a fifty—dollars, not cents. These young millionaire men did perpetrate little funnyisms like that. Why, one of them had once “beat him down” a quarter on his fare and then given him ten dollars for a tip. “Ha! ha!” repeated the fellow, surveying Bob’s elegant and faultless attire, “I’ll do it for nothing, and you—”
“Ha! Ha! That's great.” The guy had been driving Mrs. Ralston's extra guests for years, but he'd never encountered someone as quirky as this one. He laughed now as if it were the funniest joke. “Here’s the deal—I’ll do it for free, and you can decide what to pay me!” Maybe as a joke, he’d score fifty—dollars, not cents. These young millionaire types did come up with little quirks like that. I mean, one of them had once “talked him down” a quarter on his fare and then gave him ten dollars as a tip. “Ha! Ha!” the guy repeated, eyeing Bob’s stylish and impeccable outfit, “I’ll do it for free, and you—”
Bob walked away carrying his grip. Here he was telling the truth and he wasn’t believed. The man took him for one of those irresponsible merry fellows. That was odd. Was it auspicious? Should he derive encouragement therefrom? Maybe the others would only say “Ha! ha!” when he told the truth. But though he tried to feel the fellow’s attitude was a good omen, he didn’t succeed very well.
Bob walked away with his bag. Here he was telling the truth, but nobody believed him. The guy thought he was just one of those carefree jokers. That was strange. Was it a sign of good luck? Should he feel encouraged by that? Maybe the others would just laugh when he was being honest. But even though he tried to see the guy's attitude as a positive sign, he didn't have much success.
No use trying to deceive himself! Might as well get accustomed to that truth-telling habit even in his own thoughts! That diabolical trio of friends had seen plainer than he. They had realized the dazzling difficulties of the task confronting him. How they were laughing in their sleeves now at “darn fool Bob!” Bob, a young Don Quixote, sallying forth to attempt the impossible! The preposterous part of the whole business was that his role was preposterous. Why, he really and truly, in his transformed condition, ought to be just like every one else. That he was a unique exception—a figure alone in his glory, or ingloriously alone—was a fine commentary on this old world, anyhow.
No point in trying to fool himself! He might as well get used to being honest, even in his own thoughts! That wicked trio of friends saw things more clearly than he did. They understood the overwhelming challenges he was facing. They must be laughing to themselves at “foolish Bob!” Bob, a young Don Quixote, going out to take on the impossible! The ridiculous part of all this was that his role was absurd. Honestly, given his changed circumstances, he should be just like everyone else. The fact that he was a unique exception—a figure alone in his own glory, or ignobly alone—was quite a commentary on this old world, anyway.
What an old humbug of a world it was, he thought, when, passing before the one and only book-store the little village boasted of, he ran plump into, or almost into, Miss Gwendoline Gerald.
What a ridiculous old world it was, he thought, when, passing by the only bookstore that the little village had, he nearly bumped right into Miss Gwendoline Gerald.
She, at that moment, had just emerged from the shop with a supply of popular magazines in her arms. A gracious expression immediately softened the young lady’s lovely patrician features and she extended a hand. As in a dream Bob looked at it, for the fraction of a second. It was a beautiful, shapely and capable hand. It was also sunburned. It looked like the hand of a young woman who would grasp what she wanted and wave aside peremptorily what she didn’t want. It was a strong hand, but it was also an adorable hand. It went with the proud but lovely face. It supplemented the steady, direct violet eyes. The pink nails gleamed like sea-shells. Bob set down the grip and took the hand. His heart was going fast.
She had just come out of the shop with a stack of popular magazines in her arms. A gracious smile quickly softened the young lady’s beautiful patrician features as she reached out her hand. For a split second, Bob stared at it, almost as if in a dream. It was a stunning, shapely hand that looked capable. It also had a sun-kissed hue. It seemed like the hand of a young woman who would confidently take what she wanted and dismiss what she didn't. It was a strong hand, yet also charming. It matched her proud but lovely face and complemented her steady, direct violet eyes. Her pink nails sparkled like seashells. Bob set down the bag and took her hand. His heart raced.
“Glad to see you,” said Miss Gwendoline.
“Great to see you,” said Miss Gwendoline.
Bob remained silent. He was glad and he wasn’t glad. That is to say, he was deliriously glad and he knew he ought not to be. He found it difficult to conceal the effect she had upon him. He dreaded, too, the outcome of that meeting. So, how should he answer and yet tell the truth? It was considerable of a “poser,” he concluded, as he strove to collect his perturbed thoughts.
Bob stayed quiet. He felt both happy and not happy. In other words, he was incredibly happy, but he knew he shouldn’t be. He struggled to hide how much she affected him. He also feared what would come from that meeting. So, how could he respond while still being honest? It was quite a dilemma, he thought, as he tried to gather his scattered thoughts.
“Well, why don’t you say something?” she asked.
“Well, why don’t you say something?” she asked.
“Lovely clay,” observed Bob.
"Nice clay," observed Bob.
The violet eyes drilled into him slightly. Shades of Hebe! but she had a fine figure! She looked great next to Bob. Maybe she knew it. Perhaps that was why she was just a shade more friendly and gracious to him than to some of the others. They two appeared so well together. He certainly did set her off.
The violet eyes stared at him intensely. Wow, she had an amazing figure! She looked fantastic next to Bob. Maybe she was aware of it. Perhaps that's why she seemed a little more friendly and gracious to him than to some of the others. They really looked good together. He definitely made her shine.
“Is that all you have to say?” asked Miss Gwendoline after a moment.
“Is that all you have to say?” Miss Gwendoline asked after a moment.
“Let me put those magazines in the trap for you?” said Bob, making a desperate recovery and indicating the smart rig at the curb as he spoke.
“Can I put those magazines in the trap for you?” said Bob, making a quick save and pointing to the stylish carriage at the curb as he spoke.
“Thanks,” she answered. “Make yourself useful.” And gave them to him. But there was now a slight reserve on her part. His manner had slightly puzzled her. There was a constraint, or hold-offishness about him that seemed to her rather a new symptom in him. What did it mean? Had he misinterpreted her “Will you?” The violet eyes flashed slightly, then she laughed. How ridiculous!
“Thanks,” she said. “Do something useful.” And she handed them to him. But now there was a slight distance on her part. His behavior had confused her a bit. There was a tension or aloofness about him that felt like a new thing to her. What did it mean? Had he misunderstood her “Will you?” The violet eyes flickered slightly, then she laughed. How silly!
“There! You did it very well,” she commended him mockingly.
“There! You did that really well,” she teased him.
“Thanks,” said Bob awkwardly, and shifted. It would be better if she let him go. Those awful things he might say?—that she might make him say? But she showed no disposition to permit him to depart at once. She lingered. People didn’t usually seek to terminate talks with her. As a rule they just stuck and stuck around and it was hard to get rid of them. Did she divine his uneasiness? Bob showed he certainly wasn’t enjoying himself. The violet eyes grew more and more puzzled.
“Thanks,” Bob said awkwardly as he shifted in his seat. It would be better if she let him leave. Those awful things he might say?—that she might make him say? But she didn’t seem ready to let him go just yet. She lingered. People usually didn’t try to end conversations with her. Typically, they just stuck around, and it was hard to get rid of them. Did she sense his discomfort? Bob clearly wasn’t enjoying himself. The violet eyes became more and more confused.
“What a brilliant conversationalist you are to-day, Mr. Bennett!” she remarked with a trace of irony in her tones.
“What a brilliant conversationalist you are today, Mr. Bennett!” she said, a hint of irony in her voice.
“Yes; I don’t feel very strong on the talk to-day,” answered Bob truthfully.
“Yes; I'm not feeling very strong during the conversation today,” answered Bob honestly.
Miss Gwendoline pondered a moment on this. She had seen young men embarrassed before—especially when she was alone with them. Sometimes her decidedly pronounced beauty had a disquieting effect on certain sensitive young souls. Bob’s manner recalled the manner of one or two of those others just before they indulged, or tried to indulge, in unusual sentiments, or too close personalities. Miss Gerald’s long sweeping lashes lowered ominously. Then they slowly lifted. She didn’t feel to-day any inordinate endeavor or desire on Bob’s part to break down the nice barriers of convention and to establish that more intimate and magnetic atmosphere of a new relationship. Well, that was the way it should be. It must be he was only stupid at the moment. That’s why he acted strange and unlike himself.
Miss Gwendoline thought about this for a moment. She had seen young men get awkward before—especially when she was alone with them. Sometimes her striking beauty unsettled certain sensitive young guys. Bob’s behavior reminded her of a couple of those other guys just before they tried to share unusual feelings or get too personal. Miss Gerald’s long, sweeping lashes dropped ominously. Then they slowly lifted. She didn’t sense any strong push or desire from Bob today to break down the nice boundaries of convention and create a more intimate and magnetic vibe of a new relationship. Well, that’s how it should be. He must just be acting dumb right now. That’s why he was acting weird and not like himself.
Perhaps he had been up late the night before. Maybe he had a headache. His handsome face was certainly very sober. There was a silent appeal to her in that blond head, a little over half-a-head above hers. Miss Gwendoline’s red lips softened. What a great, big, nice-looking boy he was, after all! She let the lights of her eyes play on him more kindly. She had always thought Bob a good sort. He was an excellent partner in tennis and when it came to horses—they had certainly had some great spurts together. She had tried to follow Bob but it had sometimes been hard. His “jumps” were famous. What he couldn’t put a horse over, no one else could. For the sake of these and a few kindred recollections, she softened.
Maybe he had been up late the night before. Perhaps he had a headache. His attractive face definitely looked serious. There was a quiet appeal to her in that blond head, which was a little more than a head taller than hers. Miss Gwendoline’s red lips softened. What a great, big, good-looking guy he was, after all! She let her eyes shine on him more warmly. She had always thought Bob was a good guy. He was an excellent tennis partner, and when it came to horses—they had certainly had some amazing adventures together. She had tried to keep up with Bob, but it had sometimes been tough. His “jumps” were legendary. If he couldn't get a horse over, no one else could. Because of these and a few related memories, she softened.
“I suppose men sometimes do feel that way the next day,” she observed with tentative sympathy. One just had to forgive Bob. She knew a lot of cleverer men who weren’t half so interesting on certain occasions. Intellectual conversation isn’t everything. Even that soul-to-soul talk of the higher faddists sometimes palled. “I suppose that’s why you’re walking.”
“I guess guys do feel that way the next day,” she said with a hint of sympathy. You just had to forgive Bob. She knew plenty of smarter men who weren’t nearly as interesting at times. Intellectual conversation isn’t everything. Even those deep discussions among the trendsetters sometimes got old. “I guess that’s why you’re out for a walk.”
“Why?” he repeated, puzzled.
“Why?” he asked, confused.
“To dissipate that ‘tired feeling,’ I believe you call it?”
“To get rid of that 'tired feeling,' I think you call it?”
“But I’m not tired,” said Bob.
“But I’m not tired,” Bob said.
“Headachey, then?”
"Got a headache, huh?"
“No.” He wasn’t quite following the subtleties of her remarks.
“No.” He didn’t fully grasp the nuances of her comments.
“Then why are you walking?” she persisted. “And with that?” Touching his grip with the tip of her toe.
“Then why are you walking?” she continued. “And with that?” She pointed at his grip with the tip of her toe.
“Save hack fare,” answered Bob.
“Save on hack fare,” answered Bob.
She smiled.
She grinned.
“Man wanted a dollar and a half,” he went on.
“Man wanted a dollar and fifty cents,” he continued.
“And you objected?” Lightly.
“And you disagreed?” Lightly.
“I did.”
"I did."
Again she smiled. Bob saw she, too, thought it was a joke. And he remembered how she knew of one or two occasions when he had just thrown money to the winds—shoved it out of the window, as it were—orchids, by the dozens, tips, two or three times too large, etc. Bob, with those reckless eyes, object to a dollar and a half—or a hundred and fifty, for that matter? Not he! If ever there had been a spendthrift!—
Again, she smiled. Bob could see that she also thought it was a joke. He remembered how she was aware of one or two times when he had just tossed money away—like throwing it out the window—dozens of orchids, tips that were two or three times too generous, and so on. Bob, with those wild eyes, object to a dollar and fifty cents—or a hundred and fifty, for that matter? Not him! If there ever was a spender!
“Well, I’ll lend a hand to a poor, poverty-stricken wretch,” said Miss Gerald, indulgently entering into the humor of the situation.
“Well, I’ll help out a poor, struggling person,” said Miss Gerald, playfully going along with the humor of the situation.
“What do you mean?” With new misgivings.
“What do you mean?” she asked, now feeling uncertain.
“Put them”—indicating the grip and the sticks—“in the trap,” she commanded.
“Put them”—she pointed to the grip and the sticks—“in the trap,” she ordered.
Bob did. He couldn’t do anything else. And then he assisted her in.
Bob did. He couldn’t do anything else. And then he helped her in.
“Thanks for timely help!” he said more blithely, as he saw her slip on her gloves and begin to gather up the reins with those firm capable fingers. “And now—?” He started as if to go.
“Thanks for the quick help!” he said more cheerfully, as he watched her put on her gloves and start to collect the reins with her strong, skilled fingers. “And now—?” He paused as if he was about to leave.
“Oh, you can get in, too.” Why shouldn’t he? There was room for two. She spoke in a matter-of-fact manner.
“Oh, you can get in, too.” Why not? There was space for two. She spoke in a straightforward way.
“I—?” Bob hesitated. A long, long drive—unbounded opportunity for chats, confidences!—and all at the beginning of his sojourn here? Dad’s words—that horrid advice—burned on his brain like fire. He tried to think of some excuse for not getting in. He might say he had to stop at a drug store, or call up a man in New York on business by telephone, or— But no! he couldn’t say any of those things. He was denied the blissful privilege of other men.
“I—?” Bob hesitated. A long drive ahead—endless chances for conversations and secrets!—and all at the start of his time here? Dad’s words—that awful advice—burned in his mind like fire. He tried to come up with an excuse to avoid getting in. He could say he needed to stop at a pharmacy, or call someone in New York for business, or— But no! He couldn’t say any of those things. He was denied the happy freedom that others had.
“Well, why don’t you get in?” Miss Gerald spoke more sharply. “Don’t you want to?”
“Well, why don’t you get in?” Miss Gerald said more sharply. “Don’t you want to?”
The words came like a thunder-clap, though Miss Gwendoline’s voice was honey sweet. Bob raised a tragic head. That monster, Truth!
The words hit like a thunderclap, even though Miss Gwendoline’s voice was as sweet as honey. Bob lifted his head in despair. That monster, Truth!
“No,” he said.
“No,” he replied.
An instant Miss Gwendoline looked at him, the violet eyes incredulous, amused. Then a slight line appeared on her beautiful forehead and her red lips parted a little as if she were going to say something, but didn’t. Instead, they closed tight, the way rosebuds shut when the night is unusually frosty. Her eyes became hard like diamonds.
An instant later, Miss Gwendoline looked at him, her violet eyes filled with disbelief and amusement. Then a faint crease formed on her lovely forehead, and her red lips parted slightly as if she was about to say something but didn’t. Instead, they pressed together tightly, just like rosebuds do when the night is unusually cold. Her eyes turned hard like diamonds.
“How charmingly frank!” she said. Then she drew up the reins and trailed the tip of the whip caressingly along the back of her spirited cob. It sprang forward. “Look out for the sun, Mr. Bennett,” she called back as they dashed away. “It’s rather hot to-day.”
“How charmingly honest!” she said. Then she pulled the reins and lightly ran the tip of the whip along the back of her energetic horse. It bolted ahead. “Watch out for the sun, Mr. Bennett,” she shouted back as they raced off. “It’s pretty hot today.”
Bob stood and stared after her. What did she mean about the sun? Did she think he had a touch of sunstroke, or brain-fever? It was an inauspicious beginning, indeed. If he had only known what next was coming!
Bob stood and stared after her. What did she mean about the sun? Did she think he had a little sunstroke or something? It was a bad start, for sure. If he had only known what was coming next!
CHAPTER IV—A CHAT ON THE LINKS
At the top of the hill, instead of following the winding road, Bob started leisurely across the rolling green toward the big house whose roof could be discerned in the distance above the trees. The day was charming, but he was distinctly out of tune. There was a frown on his brow. Fate had gone too far. He half-clenched his fists, for he was in a fighting mood and wanted to retaliate—but how? At the edge of some bushes he came upon a lady—no less a personage than the better-half of the commodore, himself.
At the top of the hill, instead of taking the winding road, Bob casually strolled across the rolling green towards the large house whose roof he could see above the trees in the distance. The day was lovely, but he felt distinctly off. A frown creased his forehead. Destiny had pushed him too far. He half-clenched his fists, feeling ready to fight and wanting to get back at someone—but how? At the edge of some bushes, he encountered a woman—none other than the wife of the commodore himself.
She was fair, fat and forty, or a little more. She was fooling with a white ball, or rather it was fooling with her, for she didn’t seem to like the place where it lay. She surveyed it from this side and then from that. To the casual observer it looked just the same from whichever point you viewed it. Once or twice the lady, evidently no expert, raised her arm and then lowered it. But apparently, at last, she made up her mind. She was just about to hit the little ball, though whether to top or slice it will never be known, when Bob stepped up from behind the bushes.
She was fair, overweight, and in her forties, maybe a bit older. She was messing around with a white ball, or rather, it was messing with her, since she didn’t seem to like where it was resting. She looked at it from one side and then the other. To an onlooker, it appeared the same no matter where you viewed it from. A couple of times, the lady, clearly not an expert, raised her arm and then brought it back down. But finally, it seemed she made up her mind. She was just about to hit the little ball, though whether she intended to top it or slice it will never be known, when Bob walked up from behind the bushes.
“Oh, Mr. Bennett!” He had obviously startled her.
“Oh, Mr. Bennett!” He had clearly surprised her.
“The same,” said Bob gloomily.
“Same here,” said Bob gloomily.
“That’s too bad of you,” she chided him, stepping back.
"That's really bad of you," she scolded him, taking a step back.
“What?”
“Excuse me?”
“Why, I’d just got it all figured out in my mind how to do it.”
“Why, I just had it all figured out in my head how to do it.”
“Sorry,” said Bob. “I didn’t know you were behind the bushes or I wouldn’t have come out on you like that. But maybe you’ll do even better than you were going to. Hope so! Go ahead with your drive. Don’t mind me.” His tone was depressed, if not sepulchral.
“Sorry,” Bob said. “I didn’t realize you were behind the bushes, or I wouldn’t have surprised you like that. But maybe you’ll perform even better than you planned. I hope so! Go ahead with your drive. Don’t worry about me.” His tone sounded downcast, if not mournful.
But the lady, being at that sociable age, showed now a perverse disposition not to “go ahead.”
But the woman, being at that social age, now showed a stubborn tendency not to “go ahead.”
“Just get here?” she asked.
“Did you just arrive?” she asked.
“Yes. Anything doing?”
"Yes. What's happening?"
“Not much. It’s been, in fact, rather slow. Mrs. Ralston says so herself. So I am at liberty to make the same remark. Of course we’ve done the usual things, but somehow there seems to be something lacking,” rattled on the lady. “Maybe we need a few more convivial souls to stir things up. Perhaps we’re waiting for some one, real good and lively, to appear upon the scene. Does the description chance to fit you, Mr. Bennett?” Archly.
“Not much. It’s actually been pretty slow. Mrs. Ralston says so herself. So I can say the same thing. Of course, we’ve done the usual stuff, but somehow it feels like something’s missing,” the lady continued. “Maybe we need a few more fun people to liven things up. Perhaps we’re waiting for someone really good and lively to show up. Does that description happen to fit you, Mr. Bennett?” she added playfully.
“I think not,” said gloomy Bob.
“I don’t think so,” said gloomy Bob.
“Well, that isn’t what Mrs. Ralston says about you, anyway,” observed the commodore’s spouse.
“Well, that’s not what Mrs. Ralston says about you, anyway,” observed the commodore’s wife.
“What does she say?”
"What does she say?"
“‘When Bob Bennett’s around, things begin to hum.’ So you see you have a reputation to live up to.”
“‘When Bob Bennett is around, things start to get lively.’ So, you see, you have a reputation to maintain.”
“I dare say. No doubt I’ll live up to it, all right.”
“I really think so. I have no doubt I'll prove myself right.”
“It’s really up to you to stir things up.”
“It’s totally up to you to shake things up.”
“I’ve begun.” Ominously.
“I’ve started.” Ominously.
“Have you? How lovely!”
“Have you? That’s great!”
This didn’t require an answer, for it wasn’t really a question. A white ball went by them, a very pretty snoop, and pretty soon another lady and a caddy loomed on their range of vision. The lady was thin and spirituelle and she walked by with a stride. You would have said she had taken lessons of a man. She looked neither to the right nor the left. At the moment, she, at any rate, was not sociably inclined. That walk meant business. She wasn’t one of those fussy beginners like the lady Bob was talking with.
This didn’t need a response because it wasn’t really a question. A white ball rolled past them, followed by a very attractive woman and her caddy coming into view. The woman was slender and elegant, striding confidently as if she had learned it from a man. She didn’t glance to the right or left. At that moment, she definitely wasn’t in a social mood. Her walk signaled that she meant business. She wasn’t one of those anxious beginners like the woman Bob was chatting with.
“Isn’t that Mrs. Clarence Van Duzen?” asked Bob.
“Isn’t that Mrs. Clarence Van Duzen?” asked Bob.
“Yes. She, too, poor dear, has had to desert hubby. Exactions of business! Clarence simply couldn’t get away. You see he’s director of so many things. And poor, dear old Dan! So busy! Every day at the office! So pressed with business.”
“Yes. She, too, poor thing, has had to leave her husband. The demands of work! Clarence just couldn’t get away. You see, he’s a director of so many things. And poor, dear old Dan! So busy! Every day at the office! So overwhelmed with work.”
“Quite so,” said Bob absently. “I mean—” He stopped. He knew Dan wasn’t pressed for business and Bob couldn’t utter even the suspicion of an untruth now. “Didn’t exactly mean that!” he mumbled.
“Yeah, right,” Bob said absentmindedly. “I mean—” He paused. He knew Dan wasn’t busy with work, and Bob couldn’t even hint at a lie now. “Didn’t really mean that!” he mumbled.
The lady regarded him quickly. His manner was just in the least strange. But in a moment she thought no more about it.
The lady glanced at him briefly. His behavior was a bit odd. But soon enough, she stopped thinking about it.
“You didn’t happen to see Dan?” she asked.
“You haven’t seen Dan, have you?” she asked.
“Yes.”
"Yep."
“At his office, I suppose?” Dan had written he hadn’t even had time for his club; that it had been just work—work all the time.
“At his office, I guess?” Dan had written he hadn’t even had time for his club; that it had been just work—work all the time.
“No.”
“No.”
“Where, then?”
“Where to, then?”
“At the club and some other places.” Reluctantly.
“At the club and some other places.” Unenthusiastically.
“Other places?” Lightly. Of course she hadn’t really believed quite all Dan had written about that office confinement. “How dreadfully ambiguous!” With a laugh. “What other places?”
“Other places?” she said lightly. Of course, she hadn't really believed everything Dan had written about that office confinement. “How ridiculously vague!” she laughed. “What other places?”
Bob began to get uneasy. “Well, we went to a cabaret or two.” No especial harm about that answer.
Bob started to feel anxious. “Well, we went to a cabaret or two.” There’s nothing particularly wrong with that response.
“Of course,” said the lady. “Why not?”
“Of course,” the woman said. “Why not?”
Bob felt relieved. He didn’t want to make trouble. He was too miserable himself. He trusted that would end the talk and now regarded the neglected ball suggestively.
Bob felt relieved. He didn’t want to cause any issues. He was too unhappy himself. He hoped that would put an end to the conversation and now looked at the neglected ball with interest.
“And then you went to still some other places?” went on the lady in that same light, unoffended tone.
“And then you went to some other places?” the lady continued in that same light, unbothered tone.
“Ye-es,” Bob had to admit.
"Yeah," Bob had to admit.
“One of those roof gardens, perhaps, where they have entertainments?” she suggested brightly.
"Maybe one of those rooftop gardens where they host events?" she said cheerfully.
Bob acknowledged they had gone to a roof garden. And again, and more suggestively, he eyed the little white ball. But Mrs. Dan seemed to have forgotten all about it.
Bob admitted they had gone to a roof garden. And again, more suggestively, he looked at the little white ball. But Mrs. Dan seemed to have completely forgotten about it.
“Roof gardens,” she said. “I adore roof gardens. They are such a boon to the people. I told dear Dan to be sure not to miss them. So nice to think of him enjoying himself instead of moping away in a stuffy old office.”
“Roof gardens,” she said. “I love roof gardens. They are such a blessing for people. I told dear Dan to make sure he checks them out. It's so nice to picture him having a good time instead of sulking in a stuffy old office.”
Bob gazed at her suspiciously. But she had such an open face! One of those faces one can’t help trusting. Mrs. Dan was just the homely, plain old-fashioned type. At least, so she seemed. Anyhow, it didn’t much matter so far as Bob was concerned. He had to tell the truth. He hadn’t sought this conversation. It was forced on him. He was only going the “even tenor of his way.” He was, however, rather pleased that Mrs. Dan did seem in some respects different from others of her sex. Bob didn’t, of course, really know much about the sex.
Bob looked at her with suspicion. But she had such an open face! One of those faces you can't help but trust. Mrs. Dan was just the down-to-earth, plain, old-fashioned type. At least, that’s how she appeared. Anyway, it didn't really matter to Bob. He had to be honest. He hadn’t started this conversation; it was thrust upon him. He was just going about his usual business. However, he was somewhat pleased that Mrs. Dan did seem, in some ways, different from other women. Bob didn’t really know much about women, of course.
“So you went to the roof garden—just you and Dan,” purred Mrs. Dan.
“So you went to the rooftop garden—just you and Dan,” Mrs. Dan said with a smile.
Bob didn’t answer. He hoped she hadn’t really put that as a question.
Bob didn’t reply. He hoped she hadn’t actually meant that as a question.
“Or were you and Dan alone?” She made it a question now.
“Or were you and Dan alone?” She asked it as a question now.
“No-a.”
“No.”
“Who else were along?”
"Who else was with you?"
“Dickie—”
“Dickie—”
“And—?”
"And what?"
“Clarence.”
“Clarence.”
She gazed toward Mrs. Clarence, while a shade of anxiety appeared on Bob’s face. In the distance Mrs. Clarence had paused to contemplate the result of an unusually satisfactory display of skill. Mrs. Dan next glanced sidewise at her caddy, but that young man seemed to have relapsed into a condition of innocuous vacancy. He looked capable of falling asleep standing. Certainly he wasn’t trying to overhear.
She looked over at Mrs. Clarence, while a look of concern crossed Bob's face. In the distance, Mrs. Clarence had stopped to think about the outcome of an impressively good display of skill. Next, Mrs. Dan glanced casually at her caddy, but that young man appeared to have drifted into a state of harmless daze. He looked like he could fall asleep while standing. Clearly, he wasn’t trying to listen in.
“Just you four men!” Mrs. Dan resumed her purring. “Or were you all alone? No ladies along?”
“Just you four guys!” Mrs. Dan continued her purring. “Or were you all by yourselves? No ladies with you?”
While expecting, of course, the negative direct, she was studying Bob and gleaning what she could, surreptitiously, or by inference. He had an eloquent face which might tell her something his lips refused to reveal. His answer almost took her breath away.
While expecting, of course, the negative response, she was observing Bob and picking up whatever she could, either secretly or by inference. He had a very expressive face that might communicate something his lips wouldn't say. His answer nearly took her breath away.
“Ye-es.”
"Yes."
He was sorry, but he had to say it. No way out of it! Mrs. Dan’s jaw fell. What she might have said can only be conjectured, for at this moment, luckily for Bob, there came an interruption.
He felt bad about it, but he had to say it. There was no avoiding it! Mrs. Dan's jaw dropped. What she might have said is anyone's guess, but at that moment, luckily for Bob, there was an interruption.
“Tête-à-têting, instead of teeing!” broke in a jocular voice. The speaker wore ecclesiastical garments; his imposing calves were encased in episcopal gaiters. Mrs. Ralston always liked to dignify her house-parties with a religious touch, and this particular bishop was very popular with her. Bob inwardly blessed the good man for his opportune appearance. He was a ponderous wag.
“Talking face to face, instead of just chatting!” interrupted a playful voice. The speaker was dressed in religious attire; his impressive calves were wrapped in bishop's gaiters. Mrs. Ralston always enjoyed adding a touch of reverence to her gatherings, and this particular bishop was well-liked by her. Bob internally thanked the kind man for his timely arrival. He was a heavy-handed jokester.
“Forgive interruption,” he went on, just as if Mrs. Dan who was non-amatory had been engaged in a furious flirtation. “I’ll be hurrying on.”
“Sorry to interrupt,” he continued, as if Mrs. Dan, who wasn’t interested in romance, had been caught up in a heated flirtation. “I’ll be on my way.”
“Do,” said Mrs. Dan, matching his tone, and concealing any inward exasperation that she might have felt.
“Do,” said Mrs. Dan, echoing his tone and hiding any frustration she might have felt inside.
“It’s I who will be hurrying on,” interposed Bob quickly. “You see, I’m expected to arrive at the house,” he laughed.
“It’s me who will be hurrying on,” Bob quickly interjected. “You see, I’m supposed to arrive at the house,” he laughed.
“Looked as if you were having an interesting conversation,” persisted the bishop waggishly.
“Looks like you were having an interesting conversation,” the bishop joked.
“And so we were,” assented Mrs. Dan. She could have stamped with vexation, but instead, she forced a smile. The dear tiresome bishop had to be borne.
“And so we were,” agreed Mrs. Dan. She could have stomped her foot in frustration, but instead, she managed a smile. The dear, annoying bishop had to be dealt with.
“Confess you find me de trop?” he went on, shaking a finger at Bob.
“Admit that you think I’m too much?” he continued, shaking a finger at Bob.
“On the contrary,” said Bob.
"Actually," said Bob.
“Has to say that,” laughed the good man. He did love to poke fun (or what he conceived “fun”) at “fair, fat and forty.” “I suppose you were positively dee-lighted to be interrupted?”
“Has to say that,” laughed the good man. He did love to poke fun (or what he considered “fun”) at “fair, fat and forty.” “I guess you were absolutely thrilled to be interrupted?”
“I was,” returned Bob truthfully.
"I was," Bob replied honestly.
“Ha! ha!” laughed the bishop.
“Ha! Ha!” laughed the bishop.
Bob looked at him. The bishop thought he was joking, just as the hackman had. Of course, no one could say such a thing as that seriously and in the presence of the lady herself. People always didn’t believe truth when they heard it. They thought telling the truth a form of crude humor, and a spark of hope-a very small one—shot through Bob’s brain. Perhaps they would continue to look upon him in the light of a joker. He would be the little joker in the pack of cards and he might yet pull off that “three weeks” without pulling down the house. Only—would Miss Gerald look upon him as a joker? Intuition promptly told him she would not. His thoughts reverted to that last meeting. Think of having told her he didn’t want—His offense grew more awful unto himself every moment. He ceased to remember Mrs. Dan, and saying something, he hardly knew what, Bob walked on.
Bob stared at him. The bishop thought he was joking, just like the cab driver had. Of course, no one could seriously say something like that in front of the lady herself. People often didn’t believe the truth when they heard it. They viewed truth-telling as a form of crude humor, and a tiny spark of hope flickered in Bob’s mind. Maybe they would keep seeing him as a joker. He could be the little joker in the deck of cards and might just get away with that “three weeks” without causing a scene. But—would Miss Gerald see him as a joker? His intuition quickly told him she wouldn’t. His thoughts went back to that last meeting. Just think of telling her he didn’t want—His regret felt worse by the second. He stopped remembering Mrs. Dan, and saying something he hardly understood, Bob kept walking.
Miss Gwendoline Gerald was on the big veranda when he reached the house. He would have thanked her humbly and with immense contrition for having transferred his bag and clubs hither, but as he went by, that gracious, stately young lady seemed not to see him. It was as if he had suddenly become invisible. Her face didn’t even change; the proud contour expressed neither contempt nor disdain; the perfectly formed lips didn’t take a more pronounced curve or grow hard.
Miss Gwendoline Gerald was on the big porch when he got to the house. He would have thanked her sincerely and with deep regret for moving his bag and clubs here, but as he walked past, that gracious, poised young woman seemed not to notice him. It was as if he had suddenly become invisible. Her expression didn’t even shift; the proud outline showed neither contempt nor disdain; her perfectly shaped lips didn’t adopt a sharper curve or become tense.
Bob felt himself shrink. He was like that man in the story book who becomes invisible at times. The fiction man, however, attained this convenient consummation through his own volition. Bob didn’t. She was the magician and he wasn’t even a joker.
Bob felt himself shrink. He was like that guy in the story who turns invisible sometimes. The fictional guy, however, achieved this convenient outcome by his own choice. Bob didn’t. She was the magician, and he wasn’t even a fool.
He managed to reach the front door without stumbling. A wild desire to attract her attention by asking her if his luggage had arrived safely, he dismissed quickly. It wouldn’t do at all. It might imply a fear she had dumped it out, en route. And if she hadn’t, such an inquiry would only emphasize the fact that she had acted as expressman—or woman—and for him!
He got to the front door without tripping. He quickly dismissed a strong urge to get her attention by asking if his luggage had arrived safely. That would be a bad move. It could suggest that he was worried she had thrown it out during the trip. And if she hadn’t, asking would just highlight that she had been the one handling his stuff—whether as a delivery person or a courier—for him!
He would go to his room at once, he told the footman. He didn’t mind a few moments’ solitude. If so much could happen before his house-party had begun—before he even got into the house—what might he not expect later? In one of the upper halls he encountered the man with the monocle.
He told the footman that he would go to his room right away. He didn’t mind a little bit of alone time. If so much could happen before his house party even started—before he even got inside the house—what could he expect later? In one of the upper halls, he ran into the man with the monocle.
“I say!” said this person. “What a jolly coincidence!”
“I say!” said this person. “What a fun coincidence!”
“Think so?” said Bob. He didn’t find anything “jolly” about it. On another occasion, he might have noticed that the eye behind the “window-pane” was rather twinkling, but his perceptions were not particularly keen at the present time.
“Think so?” Bob replied. He didn’t see anything “jolly” about it. At another time, he might have noticed that the eye behind the “window-pane” was twinkling, but his observations weren’t really sharp at the moment.
In the room to which he had been assigned, Bob cast off a few garments. Then he stopped with his shirt partly off. He wondered how Miss Gerald would look the next time he saw her? Like a frozen Hebe, perhaps! Bob removed the shirt and cast it viciously somewhere. Then he selected another shirt—the first that came along, for why should he exercise care to select? It matters little what an invisible man wears. She wouldn’t see the extra stripe or the bigger dot. Stripes couldn’t rescue him from insubstantiability. Colors, too, would make no difference. Pea-green, yellow, or lavender—it was all one. Any old shirt would do. And any old tie!
In the room where he was assigned, Bob took off a few pieces of clothing. Then he paused with his shirt halfway off. He wondered how Miss Gerald would look the next time he saw her. Like a frozen goddess, maybe! Bob threw the shirt aside angrily. Then he grabbed another shirt—the first one he found, because why bother being picky? It didn't really matter what an invisible man wore. She wouldn’t notice the extra stripe or the bigger dot. Stripes couldn’t save him from being insubstantial. Colors wouldn’t matter either. Pea green, yellow, or lavender—it was all the same. Any old shirt would work. And any old tie!
When he had finished dressing, he didn’t find any further excuse for remaining in his room. He couldn’t consult his desires as to that. He wasn’t asked there to be a hermit. He couldn’t imitate Timon of Athens, Diogenes or any other of those wise old fellows who did the glorious solitude act. Diogenes told the truth, mostly, but he could live in a tub. He didn’t have to participate in house-parties. Whoever invented house-parties, anyhow? They were such uncomfortable “social functions” they must have been invented by the English. Why do people want to get together? Bob could sympathize with Diogenes. Also, he could envy Timon his howling wilderness! But personally he couldn’t even be a Robinson Crusoe. Would there were no other company than clawless crabs and a goat and a parrot! He would not be afraid to tell them the truth.
When he finished getting dressed, he didn’t see any reason to stay in his room. He couldn’t really think about what he wanted in that moment. He wasn’t there to be a recluse. He couldn’t act like Timon of Athens, Diogenes, or any of those wise old guys who thrived in solitude. Diogenes mostly spoke the truth, but he could live in a tub. He didn’t have to join in on house parties. Who even came up with house parties, anyway? They were such awkward “social events” they must have been invented by the English. Why do people want to gather? Bob could relate to Diogenes. He also envied Timon’s wild, desolate life! But personally, he couldn’t even be a Robinson Crusoe. If only he had no company except for clawless crabs, a goat, and a parrot! He wouldn’t be afraid to tell them the truth.
He had to go down and he did. Nemesis lurked for him below. Had Bob realized what was going to happen he would have skipped back to his room. But, as it was, he assumed a bold front. He even said to himself, “Cheer up; the worst is yet to come.” It was.
He had to go down, and he did. Trouble waited for him below. If Bob had known what was going to happen, he would have rushed back to his room. But, as it stood, he put on a brave face. He even told himself, “Stay positive; the worst is yet to come.” And it was.
CHAPTER V—TRIVIALITIES
Luncheon came and went, but nothing actually tragic happened at it. Bob didn’t make more than a dozen remarks that failed to add to his popularity. He tried to be agreeable, because that was his nature. That “even-tenor-of-his-way” condition made it incumbent on him—yes, made it his sacred duty to be bright and amiable. So it was “Hence, loathed Melancholy!” and a brave endeavor to be as jocund as the poet’s lines! Only those little unfortunate moments—airy preludes to larger misfortunes—had to occur, and just when he would flatter himself he was not doing so badly.
Luncheon came and went, but nothing truly tragic happened. Bob only made about a dozen comments that didn’t boost his popularity. He tried to be pleasant because that was just who he was. His constant demeanor meant it was his duty—yes, his sacred duty—to be cheerful and friendly. So it was, “Goodbye, Melancholy!” and a brave attempt to be as cheerful as the poet's verses! Yet, those little unfortunate moments—light hints of bigger problems—had to show up just when he’d convinced himself he was doing okay.
For example, when Mrs. Augustus Ossenreich Vanderpool said: “Don’t you adore dogs, Mr. Bennett?”
For example, when Mrs. Augustus Ossenreich Vanderpool said, “Don’t you just love dogs, Mr. Bennett?”
“No. I like them.” It became necessary to qualify that. “That is—not the little kind.”
“No. I like them.” It was important to clarify that. “That is—not the small kind.”
The lady stiffened. Her beribboned and perfumed five-thousand-dollar toy-dogs were the idolized darlings of her heart. The children might be relegated to the nursery but the canines had the run of the boudoir. They rode with her when she went out in state while the French bonne took the children for an airing. “And why are the ‘little kind’ excluded from the realm of your approbation?” observed Mrs. Vanderpool coldly.
The lady tensed up. Her fancy, perfumed toy dogs that cost five thousand dollars were her prized possessions. The kids might be stuck in the nursery, but the dogs had free reign in the bedroom. They accompanied her when she went out in style while the French nanny took the kids for a walk. “And why are the ‘little ones’ left out of your affection?” Mrs. Vanderpool remarked coolly.
It was quite a contract to answer that. Bob wanted to be truthful; not to say too much or too little; only just as much as he was in honor bound to say. “I think people make too much fuss over them,” he answered at last. That reply seemed quite adequate and he trusted the lady would change the subject. But people had a way of not doing what he wanted them to, lately.
It was quite a challenge to answer that. Bob wanted to be honest; not to say too much or too little; just enough to be honorable. “I think people make too big a deal out of them,” he replied finally. That answer felt sufficient, and he hoped the lady would switch topics. But lately, people had a way of not doing what he wanted them to.
“What do you call ‘too much fuss’?” pursued the lady persistently.
“What do you mean by ‘too much fuss’?” the lady asked persistently.
Bob explained as best he could. It was rather a thankless task and he floundered a good deal as he went about it. He wasn’t going to be a bit more disagreeable than he could help, only he couldn’t help being as disagreeable as he had to be. The fact that Miss Gwendoline Gerald’s starry eyes were on him with cold curiosity did not improve the lucidity of his explanation. In the midst of it, she to whom he was talking, seemed somehow to detach herself from him, gradually, not pointedly, for he hardly knew just when or how she got away. She seemed just to float off and to attach herself somewhere else—to the bishop or to a certain judge Mrs. Ralston always asked to her house-parties that they might have a judicial as well as an ecclesiastical touch—and Bob’s explanation died on the thin air. He let it die. He didn’t have to speak truth to vacancy.
Bob explained as best as he could. It was a pretty thankless task, and he stumbled a lot while doing it. He wasn’t trying to be rude, but he couldn't avoid being as unpleasant as he needed to be. The fact that Miss Gwendoline Gerald was watching him with cold curiosity didn’t help him explain things clearly. In the middle of it, she seemed to drift away from him, gradually and somewhat subtly—he could hardly tell when or how she pulled away. She seemed to float off and connect with someone else—maybe the bishop or a certain judge that Mrs. Ralston always invited to her house parties for a mix of legal and religious perspective—and Bob’s explanation just fizzled out. He let it fade away. He didn’t have to waste his words on emptiness.
Then he tangoed, but not with Miss Gwendoline Gerald. He positively dared not approach that young lady. He didn’t tango because he wanted to, but because some one set a big music-box going and he knew he was expected to tango. He did it beautifully and the young lady was charmed. She was a little dark thing, of the clinging variety, and Dickie had gone with her some. Her father owned properties that would go well with Dickie’s—there’d been some talk of consolidation, but it had never come off. Papa was inclined to be stand-offish. Then Dickie began to get attentive to the little dark thing, though nothing had yet come of that either. Bob didn’t own any properties but the little dark thing didn’t mind that. At tangoing, he was a dream. Properties can’t tango.
Then he danced the tango, but not with Miss Gwendoline Gerald. He definitely didn’t feel brave enough to approach that young lady. He danced not because he wanted to, but because someone started a big music box and he knew he was expected to join in. He danced it beautifully and the young lady was captivated. She was a petite, dark-haired girl, the clingy type, and Dickie had spent some time with her. Her father owned properties that would nicely complement Dickie’s—there had been some discussions about merging, but nothing ever came of it. Dad was kind of standoffish. Then Dickie started to pay more attention to the petite dark-haired girl, though nothing had developed from that yet either. Bob didn’t own any properties, but the petite dark-haired girl didn’t care about that. When it came to dancing the tango, he was amazing. Properties can't dance the tango.
“You do it so well,” said the little dark thing breathlessly.
“You do it so well,” said the little dark thing, breathless.
“Do I?” murmured Bob, thinking of a stately young goddess, now tangoing with another fellow.
“Do I?” Bob whispered, imagining a graceful young goddess dancing the tango with someone else.
“Don’t you adore it?” went on the little dark thing, nestling as close as was conventional and proper.
“Don’t you love it?” continued the little dark creature, cuddling as close as was usual and appropriate.
“I might,” observed Bob. That was almost as bad as the dog question. He trusted the matter would end there.
“I might,” Bob remarked. That was almost as bad as the dog question. He hoped the issue would stop there.
She giggled happily. “Maybe you disapprove of modern dancing, Mr. Bennett?”
She giggled happily. “Maybe you don't like modern dancing, Mr. Bennett?”
“That depends,” said Bob gloomily. He meant it depended upon who was “doing the modern” with the object of your fondest affections. If you yourself were engaged in the arduous pastime with said object, you would, naturally harbor no particular objections against said modern tendencies, but if you weren’t?—
"That depends," Bob said gloomily. He meant it depended on who was "modernizing" the person you cared about the most. If you were involved in that challenging activity with that person, you would naturally have no real objections to those modern tendencies, but if you weren't?—
Bob tangoed more swiftly. His thoughts were so bitter he wanted to run away from them. The irony of gliding rhythmically and poetically in seeming joyous abandon of movement when his heart weighed a ton! If that heaviness of heart were communicated to his legs, they would in reality be as heavy as those of a deep-sea diver, weighted down for a ten-fathom plunge.
Bob danced the tango more quickly. His thoughts were so bitter he wanted to escape them. The irony of moving smoothly and gracefully in what looked like joyful freedom, while his heart felt so heavy! If that heartache affected his legs, they would truly feel as heavy as a deep-sea diver's, weighed down for a ten-fathom dive.
And in thus trying to run away from his thoughts Bob whirled the little dark thing quite madly. He couldn’t dance ungracefully if he tried and the little dark thing had a soul for rhythm. It was as if he were trying to run away with her. He fairly took away her breath. She was a panting little dark thing on his broad breast now, but she didn’t ask him to stop. The music-box ceased to be musical and that brought them to a stop. The eyes of the little dark thing—her name was Dolly—sparkled, and she gazed up at Bob with the respect one of her tender and impressionable years has for a masculine whirlwind.
And in trying to escape his thoughts, Bob twirled the little dark thing wildly. He couldn’t dance clumsily if he tried, and the little dark thing had a natural sense of rhythm. It felt like he was trying to take off with her. He nearly took her breath away. She was a breathless little dark thing on his strong chest now, but she didn’t tell him to stop. The music box stopped making music, and that’s what brought them to a halt. The little dark thing’s eyes—her name was Dolly—sparkled as she looked up at Bob with the admiration that a young girl like her has for a powerful guy.
“You quite sweep one off one’s feet, Mr. Bennett,” she managed to ejaculate.
“You really sweep someone off their feet, Mr. Bennett,” she managed to say.
At that moment Miss Gwendoline passed, a divine bud glowing on either proud cheek. She caught the remark and looked at the maker of it. She noted the sparkle in the eyes. The little dark thing was a wonder with the men. She seemed to possess the knack—only second to Miss Gwendoline, in that line—of converting them into “trailers.” Miss Gwendoline, though, never tried to attain this result. Men became her trailers without any effort on her part, while the little dark thing had to exert herself, but it was agreeable work. She made Bob a trailer now, temporarily. Miss Gwendoline turned her head slightly, with a gleam of surprise to watch him trail. She had noticed that Bob had danced with irresistible and almost pagan abandon. That argued enjoyment.
At that moment, Miss Gwendoline walked by, a radiant beauty with a glow on both proud cheeks. She caught the comment and looked at the person who made it. She noticed the sparkle in their eyes. The little dark-haired girl was a sensation with the guys. She seemed to have the ability—only slightly behind Miss Gwendoline—to turn them into "followers." Miss Gwendoline, however, never sought to achieve this; men became her followers effortlessly, while the little dark-haired girl had to put in some work, but it was enjoyable for her. She made Bob a follower for now. Miss Gwendoline turned her head slightly, a hint of surprise on her face as she watched him follow her. She had seen that Bob danced with an irresistible and almost wild joy. That showed he was having fun.
The little dark thing would “come in” ultimately for hundreds of belching chimneys and glowing furnaces and noisy factories—quite a snug if cacophonous legacy!—and Miss Gwendoline had only that day heard rumors that Bob’s governor had fallen down and hurt himself on the “street.” She, Miss Gwendoline, had not attached much importance to those rumors. People were always having little mishaps in the “street,” and then bobbing up richer than ever.
The little dark thing would eventually "come in" for hundreds of belching chimneys, glowing furnaces, and noisy factories—quite a cozy but loud legacy! That day, Miss Gwendoline had only heard rumors that Bob’s father had fallen and hurt himself on the "street." She, Miss Gwendoline, didn’t think much of those rumors. People were always having little accidents in the "street," only to bounce back richer than ever.
But now that rumor recurred to her more vividly in the light of Bob’s trailing performance and the mad abandon of his tangoing. Of course, all men are gamblers, or fortune-hunters, or something equally reprehensible, at heart! Tendency of a cynical, selfish and money-grabbing age! Miss Gwendoline was no moralist but she had lived in a wise set, where people keep their eyes open and weigh things for just what they are. Naturally a young man whose governor has gone on the rocks (though only temporarily, perhaps), might think that belching chimneys, though somewhat splotchy on the horizon and unpicturesque to the eye, might be acceptable, in a first-aid-to-the-injured sense. But Bob as a plain, ordinary fortune-hunter?— Somehow the role did not fit him.
But now that rumor came back to her more clearly in light of Bob’s awkward performance and his wild tango moves. Of course, all men are gamblers, fortune-seekers, or something just as bad at heart! It's the trend of a cynical, selfish, and money-driven time! Miss Gwendoline wasn't a moralist, but she had been around smart people who keep their eyes open and see things for what they really are. Naturally, a young man whose father is struggling (even if it’s just temporary) might think that smoking factories, although a bit messy on the horizon and unattractive to look at, could be acceptable in a “helping out” kind of way. But Bob as just an ordinary fortune-seeker?— Somehow, that just didn’t suit him.
Besides, a fortune-hunter would not bruskly and unceremoniously have refused her invitation to ride in the trap. And at the recollection of that affront, Miss Gwendoline’s violet eyes again gleamed, until for sparkles they out-matched those of the little dark thing. However, she held herself too high to be really resentful. It was impossible she should resent anything so incomprehensible, she told herself. That would lend dignity to the offense. Therefore she could only be mildly amused by it. This was, no doubt, a properly lofty attitude, but was it a genuine one? Was she not actually at heart, deeply resentful and dreadfully offended? Pride being one of her marked characteristics, she demanded a great deal and would not accept a little.
Besides, a fortune-seeker wouldn’t abruptly and rudely turn down her invitation to go for a ride in the carriage. And remembering that insult made Miss Gwendoline’s violet eyes shine even brighter, outshining the sparkle of the little dark thing. However, she considered herself too dignified to truly feel angry. It was impossible for her to be upset about something so absurd, she reasoned. That would give the offense too much importance. So, she could only feel mildly amused by it. This was certainly a noble stance, but was it a genuine one? Was she not actually, deep down, quite resentful and deeply offended? With pride being one of her strong traits, she expected a lot and wouldn’t settle for less.
The sparkles died from the hard violet eyes. A more tentative expression replaced that other look as her glance now passed meditatively over the dark little thing. The latter had certainly a piquant bizarre attraction. She looked as if she could be very intense, though she was of that clinging-vine variety of young woman. She wore one of those tango gowns which was odd, outre and a bit daring. It went with her personality. At the same time her innocent expression seemed a mute, almost pathetic little appeal to you not to think it too daring.
The sparkle faded from her deep violet eyes. A more uncertain expression replaced the previous look as her gaze thoughtfully swept over the small dark figure. It definitely had an intriguing, quirky appeal. She seemed like she could be very passionate, even though she belonged to that delicate, dependent type of young woman. She wore a tango dress that was unusual, bold, and a bit daring. It matched her personality. At the same time, her innocent expression seemed like a silent, almost sad plea for you not to consider it too bold.
As Miss Gerald studied the young lady, albeit without seeming to do so and holding her own in a sprightly tango kind of talk, another thought flashed into her mind. Bob might be genuinely and sentimentally smitten. Why not? Men frequently fell in love with the little dark thing, and afterward some of them said she had a “good deal of temperament.” Bob might be on a temperament-investigating quest. At any rate, it was all one to Miss Gerald. Life was a comedy. N’est-ce-pas? What was it Balzac called it? La Comedie Humaine.
As Miss Gerald observed the young lady, though she didn’t appear to, while engaging in a lively conversation, another thought crossed her mind. Bob might actually be genuinely infatuated. Why not? Men often fell for the little dark girl, and later some claimed she had a “lot of temperament.” Bob could be on some kind of quest to figure that out. Regardless, it didn’t matter to Miss Gerald. Life was a comedy. N’est-ce-pas? What did Balzac call it? La Comedie Humaine.
Meanwhile, other eyes than Miss Gerald’s were bent upon luckless Bob. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence looked as if they would like to have a word with him. Mrs. Dan even maneuvered in his direction at the conclusion of the dance while Bob watched her with ill-concealed apprehension. He detected, also, an uncanny interest in Mrs. Clarence’s eyes as that masterful lady eyed him and Mrs. Dan from a distance. Mrs. Dan almost got him when—the saints be praised!—Mrs. Ralston, herself, tripped blithely up and annexed him. For the moment he was safe, but only for the moment.
Meanwhile, other people besides Miss Gerald were focused on poor Bob. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence looked like they wanted to have a word with him. Mrs. Dan even moved toward him at the end of the dance while Bob watched her with barely hidden anxiety. He also noticed a strange interest in Mrs. Clarence’s eyes as that commanding woman observed him and Mrs. Dan from afar. Mrs. Dan nearly reached him when—thank goodness!—Mrs. Ralston herself cheerfully approached and claimed him. For now, he was safe, but only for the moment.
A reckless desire to end it all surged through Bob’s inmost being. If only his hostess would say something demanding an answer that would incur such disapprobation on her part, he would feel impelled, in the natural order of events, to hasten his departure. Maybe then (and he thrilled at the thought), she might even intimate in her chilliest manner that his immediate departure would be the logical sequence of some truthful spasm she, herself, had forced from him? He couldn’t talk French to Mrs. Ralston now; he was in honor bound not to. He would have to speak right up in the King’s English—or Uncle Sam’s American.
A reckless desire to end it all surged through Bob’s core. If only his hostess would say something that required a response and would upset her, he would feel compelled, as things should go, to leave quickly. Maybe then (and he got a thrill just thinking about it), she might even suggest in her coldest way that his immediate exit would make sense after some honest outburst she had forced from him? He couldn’t speak French to Mrs. Ralston now; he was honor-bound not to. He would have to speak up in proper English—or good old American.
Of course, such a consummation—Bob’s being practically forced to take his departure—was extremely unpleasant and awful to contemplate, yet worse things could happen than that—a whole string of them, one right after another!
Of course, the idea of Bob being practically forced to leave was really unpleasant and awful to think about, but worse things could happen—lots of them, one after another!
However, he had no such luck as to be ordered forthwith off the premises. He didn’t offend Mrs. Ralston at all. That lady was very nice to him (or otherwise, from Bob’s present view-point) and did most of the talking herself. Perhaps she considered that compliment (?) Bob had bestowed upon her at the Waldorf sufficient to excuse him for a while from further undue efforts at flattery. At any rate, she didn’t seem to take it amiss that Bob didn’t say a lot more of equally nice things in that Chesterfieldian manner and with such a perfect French accent.
However, he wasn’t lucky enough to be asked to leave the premises immediately. He didn’t offend Mrs. Ralston at all. She was actually very nice to him (or at least that’s how Bob saw it) and did most of the talking herself. Maybe she thought that compliment Bob had given her at the Waldorf was enough to let him off the hook for a bit when it came to flattering her. In any case, she didn’t seem bothered that Bob didn’t say many more equally nice things in that charming style with such a perfect French accent.
But he “got in bad” that afternoon with divers and sundry other guests of Mrs. Ralston. Mrs. Augustus O. Vanderpool and Miss Gerald weren’t the only ones who threw cold glances his way, for the faux pas he made—that he had to make—were something dreadful. For example, when some one asked him what he thought of Miss Schermerhorn’s voice, he had to say huskily what was in his mind:
But he really messed up that afternoon with various guests of Mrs. Ralston. Mrs. Augustus O. Vanderpool and Miss Gerald weren’t the only ones who shot him cold looks, as the blunders he made—those he had to make—were just awful. For instance, when someone asked him what he thought of Miss Schermerhorn’s voice, he had to honestly say what he was thinking:
“It is rather too strident, isn’t it?” No sugar-coating the truth! If he had said anything else he would have been compromising with veracity; he would not have spoken the thought born in his brain at the question. Of course, some one repeated what he said to Miss Schermerhorn, who came from one of the oldest families, was tall and angular, and cherished fond illusions, or delusions, that she was an amateur nightingale. The some one who repeated, had to repeat, because Miss Schermerhorn was her dearest friend and confidante. Then Miss Schermerhorn came right up to Bob and asked him if he had said it and he was obliged to answer that he had. What she said, or thought, need not be repeated. She left poor Bob feeling about as big as a caterpillar.
“It’s a bit too harsh, isn’t it?” No sugar-coating the truth! If he had said anything different, he would have compromised honesty; he wouldn’t have voiced the thought that popped into his head when asked. Naturally, someone shared what he said with Miss Schermerhorn, who came from one of the oldest families, was tall and awkward, and held onto the charming illusions, or delusions, that she was an amateur nightingale. The someone who repeated it had to, because Miss Schermerhorn was her closest friend and confidante. Then Miss Schermerhorn walked up to Bob and asked him if he had said it, and he had to admit that he did. What she said, or thought, doesn’t need to be repeated. She left poor Bob feeling about as small as a caterpillar.
“How very tactful of Mr. Bennett!” was all Miss Gerald said, when Miss Dolly related to her the little incident.
“How clever of Mr. Bennett!” was all Miss Gerald said when Miss Dolly told her about the little incident.
“That’s just what I adore in him!” gushed the temperamental little thing. “He doesn’t seem to be afraid of saying anything to anybody. He’s so delightfully frank!”
“That's exactly what I love about him!” gushed the dramatic little thing. “He doesn’t seem afraid to say anything to anyone. He’s so wonderfully straightforward!”
“Frank, certainly!” answered Miss Gerald icily.
“Of course, Frank!” replied Miss Gerald coolly.
“Anyhow, he’s a regular tango-king!” murmured Miss Dolly dreamily.
“Anyway, he’s a total tango king!” Miss Dolly murmured dreamily.
“I’m so glad you approve of him, dear!” said Miss Gerald with an enigmatic smile. Perhaps she implied the temperamental little thing found herself in a class, all by herself, in this regard.
“I’m so happy you like him, dear!” said Miss Gerald with a mysterious smile. Maybe she meant that the moody little thing was in a league of her own when it came to this.
The latter flew over to Bob. If he was so “frank” and ingenuous about Miss Schermerhorn, perhaps he would be equally so with other persons. Miss Dolly asked him if he didn’t think the bishop’s sermons “just too dear?” Bob did not. “Why not?” she persisted. Bob had just been reading The Outside of the Pot. “Why not?” repeated Miss Dolly.
The latter flew over to Bob. If he was so "frank" and open about Miss Schermerhorn, maybe he would be the same with other people. Miss Dolly asked him if he thought the bishop's sermons were "just too dear?" Bob didn’t think so. "Why not?" she pressed. Bob had just been reading The Outside of the Pot. "Why not?" Miss Dolly repeated.
“Antediluvian!” groaned Bob, then turned a fiery red. The bishop, standing on the other side of the doorway, had overheard. Maybe Miss Dolly had known he stood there for she now giggled and fled. Bob wanted to sink through the floor, but he couldn’t.
“Ancient!” groaned Bob, then turned bright red. The bishop, standing on the other side of the doorway, had heard him. Maybe Miss Dolly had known he was there because she now giggled and ran away. Bob wanted to disappear into the floor, but he couldn’t.
“So, sir, you think my sermons antediluvian?” said the bishop, with a twinkle of the eye. He never got mad, he was the best old man that way that ever happened.
“So, sir, you think my sermons are outdated?” said the bishop, with a twinkle in his eye. He never got angry; he was the best old man in that regard that ever existed.
“Yes, sir,” replied Bob, by rote.
“Yeah, sure,” replied Bob automatically.
“Thank you,” said the bishop, and rubbed his nose. Then he eyed Bob curiously. “Maybe you’re right,” he said. That made Bob feel awful, but he couldn’t retract. The truth as he saw it!—He felt as if he were chained to the wheel of fate—the truth as he saw it, though the heavens fell!
“Thanks,” said the bishop, rubbing his nose. Then he looked at Bob with curiosity. “Maybe you’re right,” he said. That made Bob feel terrible, but he couldn’t take it back. The truth as he saw it!—He felt like he was stuck on the wheel of fate—the truth as he saw it, even if the sky fell!
“Of course, that’s only my poor insignificant opinion,” he murmured miserably.
“Of course, that’s just my unimportant opinion,” he said sadly.
“Every man’s opinion is entitled to respect,” said the bishop.
“Every person's opinion deserves respect,” said the bishop.
“Yes, sir,” replied Bob, more miserably still.
“Yes, sir,” Bob replied, sounding even more miserable.
The bishop continued to study him. “You interest me, Mr. Bennett.”
The bishop kept observing him. “You’re intriguing, Mr. Bennett.”
“Do I?” said Bob. “I’m rather interesting to myself just now.”
“Do I?” Bob said. “I find myself pretty interesting right now.”
“You evidently agree with the author of The Outside of the Pot?”
“You clearly agree with the author of The Outside of the Pot?”
“That’s it.” Weakly.
“That's it.” Weakly.
“Well, cheer up,” said the bishop, and walked away.
“Well, cheer up,” the bishop said, and walked away.
Later in the day the judge might have been heard to say to the bishop that “that young Bennett cub is a good-for-nothing jackanapes”—from which it might be inferred Bob had somehow managed to rub the judge’s ermine the wrong way.
Later in the day, the judge could be heard telling the bishop that “that young Bennett kid is a lazy, arrogant fool”—which suggests that Bob had somehow managed to irritate the judge.
“Ha! ha!” laughed the bishop. “Did some one ask him what he thought of judges?”
“Ha! Ha!” laughed the bishop. “Did someone ask him what he thinks of judges?”
But the judge did not laugh. His frown was awful.
But the judge didn’t laugh. His frown was terrifying.
“Or was it about the ‘recall’? Or the relation of judges and corporations?”
“Or was it about the ‘recall’? Or the relationship between judges and corporations?”
The judge looked stern as Jove. “Ass!” he muttered.
The judge looked as serious as Jove. “Ass!” he muttered.
“Maybe he’s a progressive,” returned the bishop. “The world seems to be changing. Ought we to change with it, I wonder?”
“Maybe he’s a progressive,” the bishop replied. “The world seems to be changing. Should we change with it, I wonder?”
“I don’t,” snapped the judge. “If the world to-day is producing such fatuous blockheads, give me the world as it was.”
“I don’t,” snapped the judge. “If today’s world is creating such foolish idiots, I’d rather have the world as it was.”
“The trouble is,” said the bishop, again rubbing his nose, “can we get it back? Hasn’t it left us behind and are we ever going to catch up?”
“The problem is,” said the bishop, rubbing his nose again, “can we get it back? Hasn’t it already moved on from us, and will we ever be able to catch up?”
“Fudge!” said the judge. He and the bishop were such old friends, he could take that liberty.
“Fudge!” said the judge. He and the bishop were such old friends that he could get away with that.
Another of the sterner sex—one of Mrs. Ralston’s guests—looked as if he, too, could have said: “Fudge!” His lips fairly curled when he regarded Bob. He specialized as a vivisectionist, and he was a great authority. Now Bob loved the “under-dog” and was naturally kind and sympathetic. He had been blessed—or cursed—with a very tender heart for such a compact, well-put-up, six foot or so compound of hard-headed masculinity. Miss Dolly—imp of mischief—again rather forced the talk. It must be wonderful to cut things up and juggle with hind legs and kidneys and brains and mix them all up with different animals, until a poor little cat didn’t know if it had a dog’s brain or its own? And was it true that sometimes the dogs me-owed, and when a cat started to purr did it wag its tail instead? This was all right from Miss Dolly, but when the conversation expanded and Bob was appealed to, it was different. “Wouldn’t you just love to mix up the different ‘parts’?” asked Miss Dolly, and put a rabbit’s leg on a pussy, just to watch its expression of surprise when it started to run and found itself only able to jump, or half-jump? That got honest Bob—who couldn’t have carved up a poor dumb beast, to save his life—fairly involved, and before he had staggered from that conversational morass, he had offended Authority about two dozen times. Indeed, Authority openly turned its back on him. Authority found Bob impossible.
Another one of the serious guys—one of Mrs. Ralston’s guests—looked like he could’ve said, “Fudge!” His lips practically curled when he looked at Bob. He was a vivisectionist and a big authority on it. Bob loved the “underdog” and was naturally kind and sympathetic. He’d been blessed—or cursed—with a really tender heart for someone who was such a strong and composed six-foot-tall guy. Miss Dolly—little troublemaker that she was—forced the topic again. It must be amazing to cut up things and play around with hind legs and kidneys and brains, mixing them up with different animals, until a poor little cat didn’t know if it had a dog’s brain or its own. And was it true that sometimes dogs meowed, and when a cat started purring, did it wag its tail instead? That was fine coming from Miss Dolly, but when the conversation widened and Bob was asked to join in, it was a different story. “Wouldn’t you just love to mix up the different ‘parts’?” Miss Dolly asked, imagining putting a rabbit’s leg on a kitty just to see its surprised expression when it started to run and realized it could only hop—or half-hop? That really got to honest Bob—who couldn’t have cut up a poor helpless creature even to save his life—and before he could pull himself out of that conversational mess, he had offended Authority about two dozen times. In fact, Authority outright turned its back on him. Authority found Bob impossible.
These are fair samples of a few of his experiences. And all the while he had an uneasy presentiment that Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were waiting to get him and have their innings. Now, Mrs. Dan would bestow upon him a too sweet smile between games of tennis; then Mrs. Clarence would drift casually in his direction, but something would happen that would prevent a heart-to-heart duologue, and she would as casually drift away again. These hit-and-miss tactics, however, gradually got on Bob’s nerves, and in consequence, he who was usually a star and a cracker jack at the game, played abominable tennis that afternoon—thus enhancing his unpopularity with divers partners who simply couldn’t understand why he had fallen off so. Indeed, about every one he came in contact with was profoundly dissatisfied or disgusted with Bob. Miss Gerald, who usually played with him, now firmly but unostentatiously, avoided him, and though Bob couldn’t blame her, of course, still the fact did not tend to mitigate his melancholy.
These are fair examples of some of his experiences. All the while, he had a nagging feeling that Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were waiting to go after him and have their turn. Mrs. Dan would give him a too-sweet smile between tennis games, then Mrs. Clarence would casually drift in his direction, but something would happen that stopped them from having a real conversation, and she would just as casually drift away again. These hit-and-miss tactics gradually got on Bob’s nerves, and as a result, he, who usually excelled at the game, played terrible tennis that afternoon—making him even less popular with various partners who simply couldn’t understand why he had dropped his game. In fact, everyone he came into contact with was deeply dissatisfied or disgusted with Bob. Miss Gerald, who usually played with him, now firmly but discreetly avoided him, and although Bob couldn’t blame her, it didn’t help with his sadness.
How different in the past!—that glorious, never-to-be-forgotten past! Then he had inwardly reveled and rejoiced in her lithe movements—for with all her stateliness and proud carriage, she was like a young panther for grace. Now as luckless Bob played with some one else, a tantalizing college ditty floated through his brain: “I wonder who’s kissing her now?”
How different it was back then!—that amazing, unforgettable past! He used to secretly enjoy and celebrate her graceful movements—because despite her elegance and confident demeanor, she moved with the grace of a young panther. Now, as unlucky Bob played with someone else, a catchy college tune drifted into his mind: “I wonder who’s kissing her now?”
Of course, no one was. She wasn’t that kind. Though some one, some day, would! It was in the natural order of things bound to occur, and Bob, in fancy, saw those disdainful red lips, with some one hovering over, as he swung at a white ball and sent it—well, not where he should have.
Of course, no one was. She wasn’t that kind. But someone, someday, would! It was bound to happen as part of the natural order, and Bob, in his imagination, pictured those disdainful red lips, with someone hovering nearby, as he swung at a white ball and sent it—not where he intended.
“You are playing very badly, partner,” a reproving voice reminded him.
“You're playing really poorly, partner,” a disapproving voice reminded him.
Bob muttered something. Confound that frivolous haunting song! He would dismiss the dire and absurd possibility. Some one else was with her, though, and that was sufficiently poignant. There were several of the fellows tremendously smitten in that quarter. Fine, husky athletic chaps, too! Some of them quite expert at wooing, no doubt, for devotees of house-parties become educated and acquire finesse. They don’t have to tell the truth all the time, but on the contrary, are privileged to prevaricate in the most artistic manner. They can gaze into beautiful eyes and swear that they have “never before,” and so on. They can perform prodigies of prevarication and “get away” with them. Bob played now even worse than before.
Bob mumbled something. Damn that silly haunting song! He would push aside the grim and ridiculous thought. Someone else was with her, though, and that was enough to sting. There were quite a few guys really taken with her. Strong, athletic guys, too! Some of them were probably pretty good at flirting, since people at house parties learn the ropes and develop some charm. They don’t have to tell the truth all the time; on the contrary, they’re allowed to lie in the most skillful way. They can look into beautiful eyes and claim that they have “never before,” and so on. They can pull off impressive lies and “get away” with them. Bob played even worse now than he did before.
The sun got low at last, however, and wearily he retired to his room, to change his garments for dinner. Incidentally, he surveyed himself in the mirror with haunting earnestness of gaze. Had he grown perceptibly older? He thought he could detect a few lines of care on his erstwhile unsullied brow, and with a sigh, he turned away to array himself in the customary black—or “glad rags”—which seemed now, however, but the habiliments of woe. Then he descended to receive a new shock; he found out that Mrs. Ralston had assigned Mrs. Dan to him, to take in to dinner. Drearily Bob wondered if it were mere chance that he had drawn Mrs. Dan for a dinner prize, or if Mrs. Dan herself had somehow brought about that, to her, desired consummation. As he gave Mrs. Dan his arm he saw Mrs. Clarence exchange glances with the commodore’s good lady. Mrs. Ralston went in with the monocle man.
The sun finally dipped low, and he tiredly went to his room to change for dinner. As he did, he looked at himself in the mirror with a serious expression. Had he noticeably aged? He thought he could see a few lines of worry on his once smooth forehead, and with a sigh, he turned away to put on his usual black attire—or "glad rags"—which now felt like clothing of sadness. Then he went downstairs to face another surprise; he discovered that Mrs. Ralston had paired him with Mrs. Dan for dinner. Gloomily, Bob wondered if it was just luck that he ended up with Mrs. Dan or if she had somehow orchestrated this outcome to her liking. As he offered his arm to Mrs. Dan, he noticed Mrs. Clarence sharing looks with the commodore's wife. Mrs. Ralston entered with the monocle man.
CHAPTER VI—DINNER
Mrs. Dan dallied with Bob, displaying all the artifices of an old campaigner. Of course, she had no idea how easy it might be for her to learn all she wanted to. She could not know he was like a barrel or puncheon of information and that all she had to do was to pull the plug and let information flow out. She regarded Bob more in the light of a safety vault; the bishop’s interruption had put him on his guard and she would have to get through those massive outer-doors of his reserve, before she could force the many smaller doors to various boxes full of startling facts.
Mrs. Dan flirted with Bob, using all the tricks of a seasoned pro. Of course, she had no idea how easy it could be for her to learn everything she wanted to know. She couldn’t see that he was like a barrel full of information, and all she had to do was pull the plug and let the knowledge flow out. She saw Bob more as a safety deposit box; the bishop’s interruption had made him cautious, and she would need to get past those big outer doors of his reserve before she could access the many smaller doors to different boxes filled with surprising facts.
It was a fine tableful of people, of which they were a part. Wealth, beauty, brains and brawn were all there. An orchestra played somewhere. Being paid performers you didn’t see them and as distance lends enchantment to music, on most occasions, the result was admirable. Delicate orchids everywhere charmed with their hues without exuding that too obtrusive perfume of commoner flowers. Mrs. Ralston was an orchid enthusiast and down on the Amazon she kept an orchid-hunter who, whenever he found a new variety, sent her a cable.
It was a lovely group of people, and they were part of it. There was wealth, beauty, intelligence, and strength all around. An orchestra played somewhere in the background. Since they were paid performers, you couldn't see them, and as distance adds a special charm to music, it was usually impressive. Delicate orchids were everywhere, captivating with their colors without giving off the overpowering scent of ordinary flowers. Mrs. Ralston was an orchid lover, and down in the Amazon, she had an orchid hunter who would send her a message whenever he discovered a new variety.
So Mrs. Dan started on orchids with Bob. She hadn’t the slightest interest in orchids, but she displayed a simulated interest that sounded almost like real interest. Mrs. Dan hadn’t practised on society, or had society practise on her, all these years for nothing. She could get that simulated-interested tone going without any effort. But Bob’s attention wandered, and he gazed toward Miss Gerald who occupied a place quite a distance from him.
So Mrs. Dan started talking about orchids with Bob. She didn’t care at all about orchids, but she acted like she was really interested, which almost sounded genuine. Mrs. Dan hadn’t spent all those years learning the social game for nothing. She could easily put on that interested tone without any effort. But Bob’s attention drifted, and he looked over at Miss Gerald, who was seated quite far from him.
Mrs. Dan, failing to interest Bob on orchids, now took another tack. She sailed a conversational course on caviar. Men usually like things to eat, and to talk about them, especially such caviar as this. But Bob eyed the almost priceless Malasol as if it were composed of plain, ordinary fish-eggs. He didn’t even enthuse when he took a sip of Moselle that matched the Malasol and had more “bouquet” than the flowers. So Mrs. Dan, again altering her conversational course, sailed merrily before the wind amid the breeze of general topics and gay light persiflage. She was at her best now. There wasn’t anything she didn’t know something about. She talked plays, operas and amusements which gradually led her up to roof gardens. She took her time, though, before laying the bowsprit of her desires straight in the real direction she wished to go. She knew she could proceed cautiously and circumspectly, that there was no need for hurry; the meal would be fairly prolonged. Mrs. Ralston’s dinners were elaborate affairs; there might even be a few professional entertainment features between courses.
Mrs. Dan, unable to spark Bob's interest in orchids, decided to change her approach. She started chatting about caviar. Guys usually enjoy talking about food, especially fancy caviar. But Bob looked at the almost priceless Malasol as if it were just regular fish eggs. He didn’t even show excitement when he sipped the Moselle that complemented the Malasol and had more “bouquet” than the flowers. So Mrs. Dan, again shifting her conversation, happily sailed through a mix of general topics and light banter. This was her forte. She had something to say about everything. She discussed plays, operas, and entertainment, gradually leading the conversation to rooftop gardens. She took her time before steering her conversation in the direction she really wanted to go. She knew she could be careful and deliberate, with no need to rush; dinner would take a while. Mrs. Ralston’s dinners were elaborate affairs; there might even be a bit of professional entertainment between courses.
“And speaking about roof gardens,” went on Mrs. Dan, looking any way save at Bob, “I believe you were telling me, only this afternoon, how you and dear Dan were finally driven to them as a last resort. Poor Dan! So glad to hear he could get a breath of fresh air in that stuffy old town! Just hated to think of him confined to some stuffy old office. Men work too hard in our strenuous, bustling country, don’t you think so? And then they break down prematurely. I’ve always told Dan,” she rattled on, “to enjoy himself—innocently, of course.” She paused to take breath. “Don’t you think men work too hard in America, Mr. Bennett?” she repeated.
“And speaking of roof gardens,” continued Mrs. Dan, avoiding looking at Bob, “I believe you were telling me just this afternoon how you and dear Dan finally turned to them as a last resort. Poor Dan! I’m so glad to hear he could get some fresh air in that stuffy old town! It made me uncomfortable to think of him stuck in some old office. Men work too hard in our busy, energetic country, don’t you think? And then they break down too soon. I’ve always told Dan,” she went on, “to enjoy himself—innocently, of course.” She paused to catch her breath. “Don’t you think men work too hard in America, Mr. Bennett?” she asked again.
“Sometimes,” said Bob.
“Sometimes,” Bob said.
She gave him a quick look. Perhaps she was proceeding rather fast, though Bob didn’t look on his guard. “As I told you, I adore roof gardens. But you were telling me you men were not alone. What harm!” she gurgled. “Some people,” talking fast, “are so prudish. I’m sure we’re not put in the world to be that. Don’t you agree?”
She shot him a quick glance. Maybe she was moving a bit quickly, but Bob didn’t seem worried. “Like I said, I love roof gardens. But you mentioned you guys weren’t alone. What’s the big deal!” she laughed. “Some people,” she continued rapidly, “are so uptight. I really don’t think we’re here to be like that. Don’t you think?”
“Of course,” said Bob absently. He didn’t like the way that fellow down on the other side of the table was gazing into Miss Gwendoline’s eyes. “I beg your pardon. I—I don’t think I caught that.”
“Sure,” Bob said distractedly. He didn’t like the way that guy on the other side of the table was staring into Miss Gwendoline’s eyes. “Sorry, can you repeat that? I—I didn’t catch what you said.”
“We were saying there were some wom—ladies with you,” said Mrs. Dan quickly. Too quickly! She strove to curb her precipitancy. “You remember? You told me?” Her voice trailed off, as if it were a matter of little interest.
“We were saying there were some women—ladies with you,” Mrs. Dan said quickly. Too quickly! She tried to control her eagerness. “You remember? You told me?” Her voice faded, as if it weren’t very important.
“Did I?” Bob caught himself up with a jerk. He felt now as if he were a big fish being angled for, and gazed at her with sudden apprehension. The lady’s, mien however, was reassuring.
“Did I?” Bob jolted awake. He felt like a big fish on the line and looked at her with sudden concern. However, the lady's demeanor was calming.
“Of course,” she laughed. “Don’t you remember?”
“Of course,” she laughed. “Don’t you remember?”
“I believe I did say something of the kind.” Slowly. He had had to.
“I think I did say something like that.” Slowly. He had to.
“Surely you don’t deny now?” she continued playfully.
“Surely you’re not denying it now?” she continued playfully.
“No.” He had not spared himself. He couldn’t spare Dan. The lady’s manner seemed to say: “I don’t care a little bit.” Anyhow, the evening in question had passed innocently, if frivolously, enough. No harm would come to Dan in consequence. And again Bob’s interest floated elsewhere.
“No.” He had not held back. He couldn’t hold back Dan. The lady’s attitude seemed to say: “I don’t care at all.” Anyway, that evening had gone by innocently, if a bit aimlessly. No harm would come to Dan as a result. And again, Bob’s attention drifted elsewhere.
He noticed Miss Gwendoline did not seem exactly averse to letting that fellow by her side gaze into her eyes. Confound the fellow! He had one of those open honest faces. A likable chap, too! One of the Olympian-game brand! A weight-putter, or hammer-thrower, or something of the kind. Bob could have heaved considerable of a sledge himself at that moment.
He noticed that Miss Gwendoline didn’t seem to mind letting that guy next to her look into her eyes. Damn that guy! He had one of those open, honest faces. A nice guy, too! One of those Olympian-type athletes! A shot putter, or hammer thrower, or something like that. Bob could have thrown a pretty heavy sledge himself at that moment.
“Of course, boys will be boys,” prattled Mrs. Dan at his side, just in the least stridently. “I suppose you sat down and they just happened along and sat down, too! You couldn’t very well refuse to let them, could you? That wouldn’t have been very polite?” She hardly knew what she was saying herself now. Though a conversational general, on most occasions, her inward emotion was now running apace. It was almost beating her judgment in the race. She tried to pull herself together. “Why, in Paris, doing the sights at the Jardin or the Moulin Rouge, or the Casino de Paris, every one takes it or them—these chance acquaintances—as a matter of course. Pour passer le temps! And why not?” With a shrug and in her sprightliest manner. “So the ladies in this instance, as you were saying, came right up, too, and—?”
“Of course, boys will be boys,” Mrs. Dan chatted at his side, not too loudly. “I guess you sat down and they just happened to come along and sit down too! You couldn’t really say no to them, could you? That wouldn't have been very polite?” She wasn’t even sure what she was saying at this point. Usually a great conversationalist, her emotions were now overpowering her judgment. She tried to gather herself. “Well, in Paris, visiting the sights at the Jardin, the Moulin Rouge, or the Casino de Paris, everyone takes these random encounters as normal. Pour passer le temps! And why not?” She shrugged and put on her liveliest demeanor. “So the ladies in this case, as you mentioned, came right over, and—?”
She paused. That was crude—clumsy—even though she rattled it off as if without thinking. She was losing all her finesse. But again, to her surprise, the fish took the bait. She did not know Bob’s predicament—that he couldn’t finesse.
She paused. That was rude—awkward—even though she said it without really thinking. She was losing all her grace. But again, to her surprise, the fish bit the bait. She didn’t know Bob’s situation—that he couldn’t be graceful.
“Yes, they came up,” said Bob reluctantly, though pleased that Mrs. Dan appeared such a good kind of fellow.
“Yes, they came up,” Bob said hesitantly, but he was glad that Mrs. Dan seemed like such a nice person.
“Show-girls?” asked the lady quickly.
“Showgirls?” asked the lady quickly.
“Well—ah!—two of them were.”
"Well—uh!—two of them were."
“Two? And what were the others?”
“Two? And what were the rest?”
Bob again regarded the lady apprehensively, but her expression was eminently reassuring. It went with the music, the bright flowers and the rest of the gay scene. Mrs. Dan’s smile was one of unadulterated enjoyment; she didn’t seem displeased at all. Must be she wasn’t displeased! Perhaps she was like some of those model French wives who aren’t averse at all to having other ladies attentive to their husbands? Mrs. Dan had lived in Paris and might have acquired with a real accent an accompanying broad-mindedness of character. That might be what made the dear old commodore act so happy most of the time, and so juvenile, too! Mrs. Dan looked broad-minded. She had a broad face and her figure was broad—very! At the moment she seemed fairly to radiate broad-mindedness and again Bob felt glad—on the commodore’s account. He had nothing to feel glad about, himself, with that confounded hammer-thrower—
Bob looked at the lady again, feeling a bit nervous, but her expression was really reassuring. It matched the music, the vibrant flowers, and the lively atmosphere. Mrs. Dan’s smile was pure enjoyment; she didn’t seem bothered at all. She must not have been unhappy! Maybe she was like some of those ideal French wives who don't mind when other women pay attention to their husbands? Mrs. Dan had lived in Paris and might have picked up, along with a real accent, a certain open-mindedness. That could be why the dear old commodore seemed so happy most of the time, and so youthful, too! Mrs. Dan looked open-minded. She had a wide face and her figure was quite broad—very! Right now she seemed to radiate open-mindedness and Bob felt happy—for the commodore’s sake. He had nothing to feel happy about himself, with that annoying hammer-thrower—
“Who were the others, did you say?” repeated Mrs. Dan, in her most broad-minded tone.
“Who were the others, did you say?” Mrs. Dan repeated, in her most open-minded tone.
She seemed only talking to make conversation and looked away unconcernedly as she spoke. Lucky for Dan she was broad-minded—that they had once been expatriates together! Even if she hadn’t been, however, Bob would have had to tell the truth.
She seemed to be talking just to fill the silence and glanced away casually as she spoke. Luckily for Dan, she was open-minded—that they had once lived abroad together! Even if she hadn't been, though, Bob would have had to be honest.
“Who were the others?” he repeated absently, one eye on Miss Gerald. “Oh, they were ‘ponies.’”
“Who were the others?” he asked absently, one eye on Miss Gerald. “Oh, they were ‘ponies.’”
“‘Ponies,’” said the lady giving a slight start and then recovering. “I beg your pardon, but—ah—do you happen to be referring to the horse-show?”
“‘Ponies,’” said the lady, slightly startled and then composing herself. “I’m sorry, but—ah—are you talking about the horse show?”
“Not at all,” answered Bob. “The ponies I refer to,” wearily, “are not equine.” These technical explanations were tiresome. At that moment he was more concerned with the hammer-thrower, who had evidently just hurled a witticism at Miss Gerald, for both were laughing. Would that Bob could have caught the silvery sound of her voice! Would he had been near enough! Across the table, the little dark thing threw him a few consolatory glances. He had almost forgotten about her. Miss Dolly’s temperamental eyes seemed to say “Drink to me only with thine eyes,” and Bob responded recklessly to the invitation. The little dark thing seemed the only one on earth who was good to him. He drank to her with his eyes—without becoming intoxicated. Then she held a glass to her lips and gazed at him over it. He held one to his and did likewise. He should have become doubly intoxicated, but he didn’t. He set down his glass mournfully. Miss Gerald noticed this sentimental little byplay, but what Bob did was, of course, of no moment to her.
“Not at all,” replied Bob. “The ponies I’m talking about,” he said wearily, “aren’t actually horses.” These technical explanations were getting old. At that moment, he was more focused on the hammer-thrower, who had clearly just made a joke towards Miss Gerald, since they were both laughing. If only Bob could have caught the charming sound of her voice! If only he had been close enough! Across the table, the little dark girl threw him a few comforting glances. He had almost forgotten about her. Miss Dolly’s expressive eyes seemed to say, “Drink to me only with your eyes,” and Bob eagerly accepted the invitation. The little dark girl felt like the only person in the world who cared about him. He drank to her with his eyes—without getting drunk. Then she raised a glass to her lips and looked at him over it. He did the same with his glass. He should have felt even more intoxicated, but he didn’t. He put his glass down sadly. Miss Gerald noticed this sentimental exchange, but what Bob did was, of course, of no importance to her.
“Ponies, Mr. Bennett? And not equine?” Mrs. Dan with difficulty succeeded in again riveting Bob’s wandering attention. “Ah, of course!” Her accents rising frivolously. “How stupid of me!” Gaily. “You mean the kind that do the dancing in the musical shows.” And Mrs. Dan glanced a little furtively at her right.
“Ponies, Mr. Bennett? And not horses?” Mrs. Dan struggled to regain Bob's wandering attention. “Ah, of course!” Her tone became playfully exaggerated. “How silly of me!” She said cheerfully. “You mean the kind that dance in the musical shows.” And Mrs. Dan glanced a bit nervously to her right.
But on that side the good bishop was still expounding earnestly to the lady he had brought in. He was not in the least interested in what Mrs. Dan and Bob were saying. He was too much concerned in what he was saying himself. At Bob’s left sat the young lady who had been his partner at tennis in the afternoon but she, obviously, took absolutely no interest in Bob now. He had a vague recollection of having been forced to say something in her hearing, earlier in the day, that had sounded almost as bad as his tennis-playing had been. Truth, according to the philosophers, is beautiful. Only it doesn’t seem to be! This young lady had turned as much of the back of a bare “cold shoulder” on Bob at the table as she could. In fact, she made it quite clear Mrs. Dan could have the young man entirely to herself. So Mrs. Dan and Bob were really as alone, for confidential conversational purposes, as if they had been secluded in some retired cozy-corner.
But on that side, the good bishop was still passionately explaining things to the lady he had brought in. He wasn’t the slightest bit interested in what Mrs. Dan and Bob were saying. He was too focused on what he was saying himself. To Bob's left sat the young lady who had been his tennis partner that afternoon, but she clearly showed no interest in Bob now. He vaguely remembered having to say something in her presence earlier in the day that sounded almost as bad as his tennis skills. According to philosophers, truth is beautiful. But it sure doesn’t seem like it! This young lady was giving Bob as much of a cold shoulder as she could at the table. In fact, she made it pretty clear that Mrs. Dan could have the young man all to herself. So, Mrs. Dan and Bob were really as alone for confidential chats as if they had been tucked away in some cozy corner.
“Two show-girls and two ponies!” Mrs. Dan went on blithely. “That made one apiece.” With a laugh. “Who got the ponies?”
“Two showgirls and two ponies!” Mrs. Dan continued cheerfully. “That made one for each of us.” She laughed. “Who ended up with the ponies?”
“Clarence got one.”
"Clarence got one."
“And Dan?”
“And what about Dan?”
Bob nodded. He had to, it was in the contract. The lady laughed again right gaily.
Bob nodded. He had to; it was in the contract. The lady laughed again cheerfully.
“Dan always did like the turf,” she breathed softly. “So fond of the track, or anything equine.”
“Dan has always loved the racetrack,” she said quietly. “Really into horses or anything related to them.”
For the moment Bob became again almost suspicious of her, she was such a “good fellow”! And Bob wasn’t revengeful; because he had suffered himself he didn’t wish the commodore any harm. Of course it would be rather a ghastly joke on the commodore if Mrs. Dan wasn’t such a “good fellow” as she seemed. But Bob dismissed that contingency. He was helpless, anyway. He was no more than a chip in a stream. The current of Mrs. Dan’s questions carried him along.
For the moment Bob became almost suspicious of her again, she was such a “good friend”! And Bob wasn’t vengeful; because he had suffered himself, he didn’t wish any harm on the commodore. Of course, it would be pretty cruel if Mrs. Dan wasn’t as much of a “good friend” as she appeared. But Bob put that thought aside. He felt powerless anyway. He was just a piece of wood floating in a stream. The flow of Mrs. Dan’s questions carried him along.
“And what did the pony Dan got, look like?”
“And what did the pony Dan get look like?”
“I think she had reddish hair.”
“I think she had red hair.”
“How lurid! I suppose you all had a few ponies with the ponies?” Jocularly.
“How shocking! I guess you all had some fun with the ponies?” Jokingly.
“Yes,” said the answering-machine.
“Yes,” said the voicemail.
“I suppose the ponies had names? They usually do,” she rattled on.
“I guess the ponies had names? They usually do,” she continued.
“Yes. They had names, of course.”
“Yes. They had names, of course.”
“What was Dan’s called?”
“What did Dan call it?”
The orchestra was playing a little louder now—one of those wild pieces—a rhapsody!
The orchestra was playing a bit louder now—one of those intense pieces—a rhapsody!
“Don’t know her real name.”
"Don't know her actual name."
“Her stage name, then?”
"What's her stage name now?"
“Not sure of that!” Doubtfully.
“Not sure about that!” Doubtfully.
“But Dan must have called her something?” With a gay little laugh.
“But Dan must have called her something?” she said with a cheerful little laugh.
“Yes.” Bob hesitated. In spite of that funereal feeling, he couldn’t suppress a grin. “He called her Gee-gee.”
“Yes.” Bob paused. Even with that somber feeling, he couldn't hold back a grin. “He called her Gee-gee.”
“Gee-gee!” almost shrieked the lady. Then she laughed harder than ever. She was certainly a good actress. At that moment she caught Mrs. Clarence Van Duzen’s eye; it was coldly questioning.
“Gee-gee!” the lady almost shrieked. Then she laughed harder than ever. She was definitely a great actress. At that moment, she caught Mrs. Clarence Van Duzen’s eye; it was coldly questioning.
“And what did the pony Clarence got, look like?” Mrs. Dan had passed the stage of analyzing or reasoning clearly. She didn’t even ask herself why Bob wasn’t more evasive. She didn’t want to know whether it was that “good-fellow” manner on her part that had really deceived him into unbosoming the truth to her, or whether—well, he had been drinking too much? He held himself soberly enough, it is true, but there are strong men who look sober and can walk a chalk line, when they aren’t sober at all. Bob might belong to that class. She thought she had detected something on his breath when he passed on the links and he might have been “hitting it up” pretty hard since, on the side, with some of the men. In “vino veritas”! But whether “vino,” or denseness on his part, she was sure of the “veritas.” Instinct told her she had heard the truth.
“And what did the pony Clarence get look like?” Mrs. Dan had moved past the point of analyzing or thinking clearly. She didn’t even question why Bob wasn’t being more cautious. She didn’t want to consider if it was her “good-fellow” attitude that had really fooled him into revealing the truth to her, or whether—well, he had been drinking too much? He was holding himself together well enough, it’s true, but there are strong men who appear sober and can walk a straight line when they aren’t sober at all. Bob might be one of those guys. She thought she had caught a hint of something on his breath when he passed her on the links, and he could have been drinking pretty heavily on the side with some of the men. In “vino veritas”! But whether it was “vino” or just his own thick-headedness, she was certain of the “veritas.” Her instinct told her she had heard the truth.
“And Clarence’s pony—did she have red hair, too?” She put the question in a different way, for Bob was hesitating again.
“And Clarence’s pony—did she have red hair, too?” She asked the question differently, since Bob was hesitating again.
“No.”
“Nope.”
“What was its hue?”
“What color was it?”
“Peroxide, I guess.” Gloomily.
“Peroxide, I suppose.” Gloomily.
“Is that all you remember?” Mrs. Dan now was plying questions recklessly, regardlessly, as if Bob were on the witness-stand and she were state prosecutor.
“Is that all you remember?” Mrs. Dan was now asking questions wildly and without care, as if Bob were on the witness stand and she was the state prosecutor.
“About all. Oh!—her nose turned up and she had a freckle.”
“That's about it. Oh!—her nose was upturned and she had a freckle.”
“How interesting!” Mrs. Dan’s laugh was rather forced, and she and Mrs. Clarence again exchanged glances, but Bob didn’t notice. “And what was she called?” Breathing a little hard.
“How interesting!” Mrs. Dan’s laugh sounded a bit forced, and she and Mrs. Clarence exchanged glances again, but Bob didn’t notice. “And what was she called?” she said, breathing a little hard.
“Gid-up,” said Bob gravely.
"Let's go," said Bob gravely.
“‘Gid-up’!” Again the lady almost had a paroxysm, but whether or not of mirth, who shall say. “Gee-gee and Gid-up!” Her broad bosom rose and fell.
“‘Giddy-up’!” Once more the lady nearly had a fit, but who can say if it was from laughter. “Horsey and Giddy-up!” Her ample chest heaved up and down.
“Telegram, sir!” At that moment Bob heard another voice at his elbow. Across the table the man with the monocle was gazing at him curiously.
“Telegram, sir!” Just then, Bob heard another voice next to him. Across the table, the man with the monocle was looking at him with curiosity.
CHAPTER VII—VARYING VICISSITUDES
A footman had brought the message, which Bob now took and opened mechanically. It was from the commodore.
A footman delivered the message, which Bob now grabbed and opened absentmindedly. It was from the commodore.
“For heaven’s sake,” it ran, “return at once to New York Will explain.”
“For heaven’s sake,” it said, “come back to New York right away. I’ll explain.”
Bob eyed it gloomily. The commodore must have been considerably rattled when he had sent that.
Bob looked at it with a frown. The commodore must have been pretty shaken up when he sent that.
“Any answer, sir?” said the footman.
“Any answer, sir?” asked the footman.
Bob shook his head. What could he answer? He couldn’t run away now; the commodore ought to know that. Of all fool telegrams!—
Bob shook his head. What could he say? He couldn't run away now; the commodore should know that. What a ridiculous telegram!
“A business message, I suppose?” purred the lady at his side. “I trust it is nothing very important, to call you away?”
“A business message, I guess?” purred the lady next to him. “I hope it’s nothing too important to pull you away?”
“No, I shouldn’t call it important,” said Bob. “Quite unnecessary, I should call it.”
“No, I shouldn’t call it important,” Bob said. “I’d call it quite unnecessary.”
He crumpled up the message and thrust it into his pocket. At that moment one of Mrs. Ralston’s paid performers—a high-class monologist—began to earn his fee. He was quite funny and soon had every one laughing. Bob strove to forget his troubles and laugh too. Mrs. Dan couldn’t very well talk to him now, and relieved from that lady’s pertinent prattle, he gradually let that “dull-care grip” slip from his resistless fingers. Welcoming the mocking goddess of the cap and bells, he yielded to the infectious humor and before long forgot the telegram and everything save that crop of near-new stories.
He crumpled up the message and shoved it into his pocket. At that moment, one of Mrs. Ralston’s paid performers—a high-class comedian—started doing his thing. He was hilarious, and soon everyone was laughing. Bob tried to forget his problems and joined in the laughter. Mrs. Dan couldn’t really talk to him now, and free from her constant chatter, he gradually let go of that “dull-care grip” that had been holding him back. Embracing the lighthearted spirit of the moment, he gave in to the contagious humor and before long forgot about the telegram and everything else except for the crop of nearly new stories.
But when the dinner was finally over, he found himself, again wrapped in deep gloom, wandering alone on the broad balcony. He didn’t just know how he came to be out there all alone—whether he drifted away from people or whether they drifted away from him. Anyhow he wasn’t burdened with any one’s company. He entertained a vague recollection that several people had turned their backs on him. So if he was forced to lead a hermit’s life it wasn’t his fault. Probably old Diogenes hadn’t wanted to live in that tub; people had made him. They wouldn’t stand him in a house. There wasn’t room for him and any one else in the biggest house ever built. So the only place where truth could find that real, cozy, homey feeling was alone in a tub. And things weren’t any better to-day. Nice commentary on our boasted “advanced civilization!”
But when dinner finally ended, he found himself, once again lost in deep sadness, wandering alone on the wide balcony. He didn’t quite understand how he ended up out there by himself—whether he had drifted away from others or if they had drifted away from him. Either way, he wasn’t weighed down by anyone’s presence. He had a vague memory of several people turning their backs on him. So if he had to live like a hermit, it wasn’t his fault. Probably old Diogenes hadn’t wanted to live in that tub; people had made him. They wouldn’t let him stay in a house. There wasn’t room for him and anyone else in the largest house ever built. So the only place where truth could find that real, cozy, homey feeling was alone in a tub. And things weren’t any better today. What a nice reflection on our so-called “advanced civilization!”
Bob felt as if he were the most-alone man in the world! Why, he was so lonesome, he wasn’t even acquainted with himself. This was only his “double” walking here. He knew now what that German poet was driving at in those Der Doppleganger verses. His “double” was alone. Where was he?—the real he—the original ego? Hanged if he knew! He looked up at the moon, but it couldn’t tell him. At the same time, in spite of that new impersonal relationship he had established toward himself, he felt he ought to be immensely relieved in one respect. There would be no “cozy-cornering” for him that evening. He had the whole wide world to himself. He could be a wandering Jew as well as a Doppleganger, if he wanted to.
Bob felt like he was the most-alone man in the world! He was so lonely that he didn’t even know himself. It was just his “double” walking around. He now understood what that German poet meant in those Der Doppelgänger verses. His “double” was alone. Where was he?—the real him—the original self? He had no idea! He looked up at the moon, but it couldn’t give him any answers. At the same time, despite that distant relationship he had developed with himself, he felt like he should be really relieved in one way. There would be no “cozy corner” for him that evening. He had the whole wide world to himself. He could be a wandering Jew as well as a Doppelgänger if he wanted to.
He made out now two shadows, or figures, in the moonlight. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were walking and talking together, but somehow he wasn’t at all curious about them. His mental faculties seemed numbed, as if his brain were way off somewhere—between the earth and the moon, perhaps. Then he heard the purring of a car, which seemed way off, too. He saw Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence get into the car and heard Mrs. Dan murmur something about the village and the telegraph office, and the car slid downward. Bob watched its rear light receding this way and that, like a will-o’-the-wisp, or a lonesome firefly, until it disappeared on the winding road. A cool breeze touched him without cooling his brow. Bob threw away a cigar. What’s the use of smoking when you don’t taste the weed?
He could now see two shadows, or figures, in the moonlight. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were walking and talking together, but for some reason, he wasn’t at all curious about them. His mind felt numb, as if his brain were far off—somewhere between the earth and the moon, maybe. Then he heard the sound of a car, which also felt distant. He saw Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence get into the car and heard Mrs. Dan say something about the village and the telegraph office, and then the car drove off. Bob watched its rear light fading in and out, like a will-o’-the-wisp or a lonely firefly, until it vanished on the winding road. A cool breeze brushed against him without cooling his forehead. Bob tossed aside his cigar. What’s the point of smoking if you can’t taste the substance?
He wondered what he should do now? Go to bed, or—? It was too early for bed. He wouldn’t go to bed at that hour, if he kept to that even-tenor-of-his-way condition. He hadn’t violated any condition, so far. Those fellows who had inveigled him into this wild and woolly moving-picture kind of an impossible freak performance would have to concede that. There could be no ground for complaint that he wasn’t living up to the letter and spirit of his agreement, even at the sacrifice of his most sacred feelings. Yes, by yonder gracious lady of the glorious moon! He wondered where his gracious lady was now and what she was doing? Of course, the hammer-thrower was with her.
He wondered what he should do now. Go to bed, or—? It was too early for bed. He wouldn’t go to bed at that hour if he stuck to his usual routine. He hadn’t broken any rules so far. Those guys who had dragged him into this crazy, over-the-top movie-like performance would have to admit that. There was no reason to complain that he wasn’t following the letter and spirit of his agreement, even if it meant sacrificing his deepest feelings. Yes, by that lovely lady under the beautiful moon! He wondered where his lovely lady was now and what she was up to. Of course, the hammer-thrower was with her.
“Are you meditating on your loneliness, Mr. Bennett?” said a well-remembered voice. The tones were even and composed. They were also distantly cold. Bob wheeled. Stars of a starry night! It was she.
“Are you thinking about your loneliness, Mr. Bennett?” said a voice he recognized. The tone was steady and calm, but it also felt a bit cold. Bob turned around. Stars in a starry night! It was her.
She came right up and spoke to him—the pariah—the abhorred of many! His heart gave a thump and he could feel its hammering as his glowing eyes met the beautiful icy ones.
She walked straight up to him—the outcast—the one hated by so many! His heart raced, and he could feel it pounding as his bright eyes met her stunning, cool ones.
“How did you get rid of him?” he breathed hoarsely.
“How did you get rid of him?” he said hoarsely.
“Him?” said Miss Gwendoline Gerald, in a tone whose stillness should have warned Bob.
“Him?” said Miss Gwendoline Gerald, in a tone so calm it should have warned Bob.
“That sledge-hammer man? That weight-putter? That Olympian village blacksmith, I mean? The fellow with the open honest face?”
“That guy who throws the hammer? That shot putter? That Olympic village blacksmith, you know? The guy with the really genuine face?”
“I don’t believe I understand,” observed the young lady, straight and proud as a wonderful princess in the moonlight. Bob gazed at her in rapture. Talk about the shoulders of that girl who had given him the cold shoulder at the dinner-table!—Miss Gwendoline’s shoulders were a thousand times superior; they would cause any sculptor to rave. Their plastic beauty was that of the purest marble in that pure light. And that pure, perfect face, likewise bathed in the celestial flood of light—until now, never had he quite realized what he had lost, in losing her.
“I don’t think I understand,” the young lady said, standing tall and proud like a stunning princess in the moonlight. Bob looked at her in awe. Just think about the shoulders of that girl who had ignored him at the dinner table!—Miss Gwendoline’s shoulders were a thousand times better; they would make any sculptor go wild. Their sculptural beauty was like the purest marble in that brilliant light. And that flawless, beautiful face, also illuminated by the heavenly glow—until now, he had never fully understood what he had lost in losing her.
“But never mind about explaining,” went on the vision, apropos of Bob’s Olympian, village-blacksmith remark. “I didn’t come to discuss generalities.”
“But let’s skip the explaining,” the vision continued, in response to Bob’s lofty village-blacksmith comment. “I didn’t come here to talk about generalities.”
“Of course not,” assented Bob eagerly.
"Of course not," Bob replied eagerly.
The music from the house now sounded suspiciously like a trot. Miss Gerald saw, though indistinctly, a face look out of the door. It might have been the little dark thing peering around for Bob, for she was quite capable of doing that. Bob didn’t notice her—if it were she. He had eyes for but one. He was worshiping in that distant, eager, hungry, lost-soul kind of a way. Miss Gerald’s glance returned to Bob.
The music coming from the house now had a rhythmic beat that felt like a trot. Miss Gerald saw a face peek out from the door, though she couldn’t make it out clearly. It could have been that little dark figure looking for Bob because she was totally the type to do that. Bob didn’t notice her—if it was indeed her. He only had eyes for one person. He was admiring her in that distant, eager, hungry, lost-soul way. Miss Gerald’s gaze shifted back to Bob.
“Will you be so good as to take a turn or two about the garden with me?” she said in a calm, if hard and matter-of-fact tone. A number of people were now approaching from the other end of the broad, partially-enclosed space and Miss Gerald had observed them.
“Could you please walk around the garden with me for a bit?” she said in a calm, but firm and straightforward tone. A few people were now coming from the other end of the wide, partly enclosed area, and Miss Gerald had noticed them.
“Will I?” Bob’s accents expressed more eloquently than words how he felt about complying with that request. Would a man dying of thirst drink a goblet of cool, sparkling spring-water? Would a miser refuse gold? Or a canine a bone? “Will I?” repeated Bob, ecstatically, and threw back his shoulders. Thus men go forth to conquer. He did not realize how unique he was at the moment, for he was quite swept away. The girl cast on him a quick enigmatic glance, then led the way.
“Will I?” Bob's tone conveyed more than words ever could about how he felt about following that request. Would a man dying of thirst drink a cup of cool, sparkling spring water? Would a miser turn down gold? Or a dog a bone? “Will I?” Bob repeated, exhilarated, and threw back his shoulders. This is how people set out to conquer. He didn’t realize how special he was at that moment; he was completely caught up in it. The girl gave him a quick, mysterious look, then took the lead.
Sometimes his eyes turned to the stars and sometimes toward her as they moved along. In the latter instance, they were almost proprietary, as if he knew she ought to belong to him, though she never would. The stars seemed to say she was made for him, the breeze to whisper it. Of course, he hadn’t really any right to act “proprietary”; it was taking a certain poetic license with the situation. Once Miss Gerald caught that proprietary look and into the still depths of her own gaze sprang an expression of wonder. But it didn’t linger; her eyes became once more coldly, proudly assured.
Sometimes his eyes drifted to the stars and sometimes to her as they walked together. In the latter case, his gaze felt almost possessive, as if he believed she was meant to be his, even though she never would be. The stars seemed to suggest that she was made for him, and the breeze seemed to whisper the same. Of course, he didn't really have any right to act possessively; it was a bit of poetic license. Once, Miss Gerald caught that possessive look, and in the still depths of her gaze emerged an expression of wonder. But it didn’t last; her eyes grew cold and proudly self-assured once more.
Bob didn’t ask whither she was leading him, or what fate had in store for him. Sufficient unto the present moment was the happiness thereof! A fool’s paradise is better than no paradise at all. He didn’t stop now to consider that he might be playing with verity when he hugged to his breast an illusory joy.
Bob didn’t ask where she was taking him, or what fate had in store for him. The happiness of the moment was enough! A fool's paradise is better than no paradise at all. He didn’t stop to think that he might be toying with the truth when he clung to a false joy.
She didn’t talk at first, but he didn’t find anything to complain of in that. It was blissful enough just to swing along silently at her side. He didn’t have to bother about the truth-proposition when she didn’t say anything. He could yield to a quiet unadulterated joy in the stillness. If denied, temporarily, the music of her voice, he was, at least, privileged to visualize her, as she walked along the narrow path with the freedom and grace of a young goddess, or one of Diana’s lithe forest attendants. The vision, at length, stopped at the verge of a terrace where stood an Italian-looking little summer-house, or shelter. No one was in it, and she entered. They wouldn’t be disturbed here.
She didn’t speak at first, but he didn’t mind that at all. It was enough to just walk silently beside her. He didn’t have to think about what to say when she was quiet. He could enjoy the peaceful happiness in the silence. Although he missed hearing her voice for a moment, he was lucky enough to picture her as she walked down the narrow path with the grace of a young goddess, like one of Diana’s nimble attendants. The image eventually landed at a terrace where there was a charming little summer house that looked Italian. No one was inside, and she stepped in. They wouldn’t be interrupted here.
She leaned on a marble balustrade and for a moment looked down upon the shadowy tree-tops. The moonlight glinted a rounded white arm. Bob breathed deep. It was a spot for lovers. But there was still no love-light in Miss Gerald’s eyes. They met the gaze of Bob, who hadn’t yet come out of that paradoxical trance, with cold contemplation.
She leaned on a marble railing and for a moment looked down at the shadowy tree tops. The moonlight shimmered on her smooth white arm. Bob took a deep breath. It was a place for lovers. But there was still no spark in Miss Gerald’s eyes. They met Bob’s gaze, who was still caught in that strange daze, with a cold, thoughtful look.
“Do you know what people are beginning to say about you, Mr. Bennett?” began the vision, with considerable decision in her tones.
“Do you know what people are starting to say about you, Mr. Bennett?” the vision began, her tone quite firm.
“No,” said Bob.
“No,” Bob said.
“Some of them are wondering—well, if you are mentally quite all right.”
“Some of them are wondering—well, if you are mentally okay.”
“Are they?” It was more the silvery sound of her voice than what people were saying that interested Bob.
“Are they?” It was more the soft tone of her voice than what people were saying that caught Bob's attention.
“The judge and Mrs. Vanderpool have agreed that you aren’t. People are a little divided in the matter.”
“The judge and Mrs. Vanderpool have agreed that you’re not. People are a bit divided on the issue.”
“Indeed?” observed Bob. Of course if people were “divided,” that would make it more interesting for them. Give them something to talk about!
“Really?” Bob remarked. Of course, if people were “divided,” that would make it more interesting for them. Give them something to talk about!
“The doctor agrees with the judge and Mrs. Vanderpool, but the bishop seems inclined to give you the benefit of the doubt,” went on Miss Gerald, her silvery tones as tranquil and cold as moonlight on the still surface of an inland sea. “He said something about inherited eccentricities, probably just beginning to crop out. Or suggested it might be—well, a pose.”
“The doctor agrees with the judge and Mrs. Vanderpool, but the bishop seems willing to give you the benefit of the doubt,” continued Miss Gerald, her voice as calm and icy as moonlight on the still surface of a quiet lake. “He mentioned something about inherited quirks, probably just starting to show up. Or he suggested it might be—well, an act.”
“Very nice of the bishop!” muttered Bob. “Benefit of the doubt? Quite so! Fine old chap!”
“Really nice of the bishop!” muttered Bob. “Benefit of the doubt? Exactly! Great guy!”
“Is that all you have to say?” said Miss Gerald, a faint note of scorn in her voice now. As she spoke she leaned slightly toward him. The moonlight touched the golden hair.
“Is that all you have to say?” Miss Gerald asked, a hint of disdain in her voice. As she spoke, she leaned a bit toward him. The moonlight highlighted her golden hair.
“Maybe he felt he had to differ,” remarked Bob, intent on the golden hair (it wasn’t golden out here, of course) and the stars beyond. “He might not really differ at heart, but he had to seem broad and charitable. Ecclesiastical obligation, or habit, don’t you see!”
“Maybe he felt he needed to stand out,” Bob said, focused on the golden hair (it definitely didn’t look golden out here) and the stars beyond. “He might not actually feel different deep down, but he had to appear open-minded and generous. It’s a religious duty, or just a habit, you know!”
“I don’t quite see,” said the girl, though her bright eyes looked capable of seeing a great deal.
“I don’t really see,” said the girl, even though her bright eyes seemed like they could see a lot.
“No?” murmured Bob. Some of that paradoxical happiness seemed to be fading from him. He couldn’t hold it; it seemed as elusive as moonshine. If only she would stand there silently and let him continue to worship her, like that devout lover in the song—in “distant reverence.” It wasn’t surely quite consistent for a goddess to be so practical and matter-of-fact.
“No?” murmured Bob. Some of that puzzling happiness seemed to be fading from him. He couldn’t hold onto it; it felt as elusive as moonlight. If only she would just stand there quietly and let him keep admiring her, like that devoted lover in the song—in “distant reverence.” It didn't seem very consistent for a goddess to be so practical and down-to-earth.
“There are others who agree with the doctor and the judge and Mrs. Vanderpool,” continued the girl.
“There are others who agree with the doctor, the judge, and Mrs. Vanderpool,” the girl continued.
“You mean about my having a screw loose?”
"You mean about me having a screw loose?"
“Exactly.” Crisply. “And some of them have consulted me.”
“Exactly.” Short and to the point. “And some of them have asked for my advice.”
“And what did you say?” Quickly.
“And what did you say?” Quickly.
“I’m afraid I couldn’t enlighten them. I believe I suggested that sun theory—although it really wasn’t blistering hot to-day, and you,” with inimitable irony, “look capable of standing a little sunshine.”
“I’m afraid I couldn’t help them out. I think I mentioned that sun theory—even though it wasn’t super hot today, and you,” with a unique sense of irony, “look like you can handle a little sunshine.”
“Yes, I feel as if I could stand a whole lot,” said Bob gloomily.
“Yes, I feel like I could handle a lot,” Bob said gloomily.
“Also I said,” unmindful of this last remark, “there is sometimes a method in eccentricity, or madness. Lord Stanfield agreed with me. He said he found you an ‘interesting young man.’”
“Also, I said,” not paying attention to that last comment, “there can be a method to eccentricity or madness. Lord Stanfield agreed with me. He mentioned that he found you an ‘interesting young man.’”
“Did he? Confound his impudence!” That monocle-man certainly did ruffle Bob.
“Did he? Damn his boldness!” That monocle guy definitely got under Bob’s skin.
“You forget he’s an old friend of my aunt’s.” Severely. “As I was saying, Lord Stanfield found you ‘interesting,’ and we agreed there might be a method,” studying him closely, “but when we came to search for one, we couldn’t find it.”
“You forget he's an old friend of my aunt’s.” Seriously. “As I was saying, Lord Stanfield found you ‘interesting,’ and we agreed there might be a way,” studying him closely, “but when we tried to look for one, we couldn’t find it.”
She didn’t ask a question, so he didn’t have to reply.
She didn't ask a question, so he didn't have to respond.
“Mr. Bennett, why did you answer me like that down in the village?”
“Mr. Bennett, why did you respond to me like that in the village?”
Bob hung his head. He felt worse than a boy detected stealing apples. “Had to,” he muttered desperately.
Bob hung his head. He felt worse than a kid caught stealing apples. “Had to,” he muttered desperately.
“Why?” There was no mercy in that still pitiless voice.
“Why?” There was no kindness in that cold, unfeeling voice.
Bob took another long breath. “Please don’t ask me,” he pleaded after an ominous pause. That wasn’t not telling the truth; it was only temporizing.
Bob took another deep breath. “Please don’t ask me,” he begged after a heavy pause. That wasn't lying; it was just buying time.
The violet eyes gleamed dangerously. “I’m just a little bit curious,” said the girl in the same annihilating tone. “In the light of subsequent proceedings, you will understand! And as Mrs. Ralston’s niece! Aunt doesn’t quite realize things yet. The others have spared her feelings. I haven’t, of course, gone to her. Aunt and I never ‘talk over’ our guests.” Proudly.
The violet eyes shone with a hint of danger. “I’m just a little curious,” the girl said in the same cutting tone. “You’ll understand when you see what happens next! And being Mrs. Ralston’s niece! Aunt isn’t fully aware of everything yet. The others have been considerate of her feelings. I haven’t, of course, spoken to her. Aunt and I never discuss our guests.” She said this proudly.
That made Bob wince. He looked at her with quite helpless eyes. “Maybe she will order me off the premises before long,” he said eagerly. “I have already been considering the possibility of it. Believe me,” earnestly, “it would be the best way. Can’t you see I’m—dangerous—positively dangerous? I’m worse than a socialist—an anarchist! Why, a Russian nihilist couldn’t make half the trouble in the world that I can. I’m a regular walking disturber. Disaster follows in my path.” Bitterly. “Some people look upon me as worse than the black plague. Now if your aunt would only turn me out? You see I can’t go unless she does. Got to think of that even-tenor-of-my-way! But if she would only quietly intimate—or set the dog on me—”
That made Bob wince. He looked at her with helpless eyes. “Maybe she’ll kick me off the property soon,” he said eagerly. “I’ve already been thinking about the chance of it. Believe me,” he said earnestly, “it would be the best way. Can’t you see I’m—dangerous—really dangerous? I’m worse than a socialist—an anarchist! A Russian nihilist couldn’t cause half the trouble in the world that I can. I’m a walking disaster. Trouble follows me wherever I go.” Bitterly. “Some people see me as worse than the black plague. Now if only your aunt would just throw me out? You see I can’t leave unless she does. I have to keep that in mind—my even-kill way! But if she would just quietly hint—or send the dog after me—”
The girl gazed at him more steadily. “I wonder if the judge and the doctor and Mrs. Vanderpool aren’t right, after all?” she observed slowly. “Let me look in your eyes, Mr. Bennett.” Bob did. Miss Gerald had heard that one could always tell crazy people by their eyes. She intended to sift this matter to the bottom and therefore proceeded with characteristic directness. Folk that were—well, “off,” she had been told, invariably showed that they were that, by a peculiar glitter.
The girl looked at him more intently. “I wonder if the judge, the doctor, and Mrs. Vanderpool are actually right?” she said thoughtfully. “Let me look into your eyes, Mr. Bennett.” Bob did. Miss Gerald had heard that you could always spot crazy people by their eyes. She planned to get to the bottom of this and so she moved forward with her usual straightforwardness. People who were—well, “off,” she had been told, always showed that they were different by a certain peculiar sparkle in their eyes.
Miss Gerald gazed a few moments critically, steadily and with unswerving intention. Bob withstood that look with mingled wretchedness and rapture. He began to forget that they were just the eyes of a would-be expert on a mental matter, and his own eyes, looking deeper and deeper in those wonderful violet depths (he stood so she got the benefit of the moonlight) began to gleam with that old, old gleam Miss Gerald could remember in the past. Bob had never talked love in those blissful days of yore, but he had looked it.
Miss Gerald stared for a few moments, critically and with unwavering purpose. Bob held up against that gaze, feeling a mix of misery and joy. He started forgetting that her eyes belonged to someone trying to understand something mental, and his own eyes, diving deeper into those beautiful violet depths (he positioned himself so she could catch the moonlight) began to shine with that familiar light Miss Gerald remembered from the past. Bob had never made a big show of love in those happy days long ago, but he had definitely expressed it in his gaze.
“I don’t see any signs of insanity,” said the girl at length with cold assurance. That gleam wasn’t a glitter. Nothing crazy about it! She had seen it too often in other men’s eyes, as well as in Bob’s—not perhaps to such a marked degree in other men’s eyes,-but sufficiently so that she was fairly familiar with it. “You look normal enough to me.”
“I don’t see any signs of insanity,” the girl finally said with cool confidence. That glint wasn’t a sparkle. Nothing crazy about it! She had seen it too often in other men’s eyes, along with Bob’s—not perhaps to such a noticeable extent in other men’s eyes—but enough that she was pretty familiar with it. “You look normal enough to me.”
“Thank you,” said Bob gratefully.
“Thanks,” Bob said gratefully.
“And that’s just why”—a slight frown on the smooth fine brow—“I don’t understand. Of course, a man not normal, might have answered as you did me (I’m not thinking of it as a personal matter, you will understand).”
“And that’s exactly why”—a slight frown on the smooth forehead—“I don’t get it. Sure, a man who isn’t normal might have responded the way you did to me (I’m not taking it personally, you understand).”
“Oh, I understand that,” returned Bob. “I’m just a problem, not a person.” She made him quite realize that. She made it perfectly and unmistakably apparent that he was, unto her, as some example in trigonometry, or geometry, or algebra, and she wanted to find the “solution.” He was an “X”—the unknown quantity. The expression on her patrician features was entirely scholastic and calculating. Bob now felt the ardor of his gaze becoming cold as moonlight. This wasn’t a lovers’ bower; it was only a palestra, or an observatory.
“Oh, I get that,” Bob replied. “I’m just a problem, not a person.” She made it very clear to him. She made it completely obvious that he was, to her, like some example in trigonometry, geometry, or algebra, and she wanted to find the “solution.” He was an “X”—the unknown variable. The look on her aristocratic features was entirely academic and calculating. Bob now felt the intensity of his gaze turning as cold as moonlight. This wasn’t a romantic hideaway; it was just a palestra, or an observatory.
“You haven’t answered me yet,” she said.
“You still haven’t answered me,” she said.
No diverting her from her purpose! She was certainly persistent.
No changing her mind! She was definitely determined.
“You insist I shall tell you why I didn’t want to see you?”
“You're insisting that I tell you why I didn't want to see you?”
She looked at him quickly. “That isn’t what I asked, Mr. Bennett. I asked you to explain that remark in the village.”
She glanced at him quickly. “That’s not what I asked, Mr. Bennett. I asked you to explain that comment in the village.”
“Same thing!” he murmured. “And it’s rather hard to explain, but if I’ve got to—?” He looked at her. On her face was the look of proud unyielding insistence. “Of course, I’ve got to tell you the truth,” said Bob, and his tone now was dead and dull. “In the first place, dad’s busted, clean down and out, and—well, I thought I wouldn’t see you any more.”
“Same thing!” he whispered. “And it’s pretty hard to explain, but if I have to—?” He glanced at her. Her expression was one of proud, unwavering insistence. “Of course, I have to be honest with you,” said Bob, and his tone was flat and lifeless. “First off, Dad’s broke, completely out of money, and—well, I thought I wouldn’t see you again.”
“I fail to see the connection.” Her tones were as metallic as a voice like hers could make them.
“I don't see the connection.” Her tone was as cold as a voice like hers could make it.
“It’s like this!” said Bob, ruffling his hair. Here was a fine romantic way to make an avowal. “You see I was in love with you,” he observed, looking the other way and addressing one of the furthermost stars of the heaven. “And—and—when a fellow’s in love—and he can’t—ah!—well, you know—ask the girl—you understand?”
“It’s like this!” said Bob, messing up his hair. Here was a pretty dramatic way to confess his feelings. “You see, I was in love with you,” he said, looking away and focusing on one of the distant stars in the sky. “And—and—when a guy is in love—and he can’t—ah!—well, you know—ask the girl—you get what I mean?”
“Very vaguely,” said Miss Gerald. Bob’s explanation, so far, was one of those explanations that didn’t explain. If he had so heroically made up his mind not to see her, he could have stayed away, of course, from the Ralston house. He couldn’t explain how he was bound to accept the invitation to come, on account of being in “honor bound” to that confounded commodore, et al., to do so. There were bound to be loose ends to his explanation. Besides, those other awfully unpleasant things that had happened? He had to tell the truth, but he couldn’t tell why he was telling the truth. That had been the understanding.
“Very vaguely,” said Miss Gerald. Bob’s explanation so far was one of those that just didn’t make sense. If he had truly decided not to see her, he could have easily avoided the Ralston house. He couldn’t explain why he felt obligated to accept the invitation because he was supposedly “honor bound” to that annoying commodore, among others. There were sure to be gaps in his explanation. On top of that, what about those other really unpleasant things that had happened? He needed to tell the truth, but he couldn’t explain why he was being truthful. That was what they had agreed on.
Miss Gerald, at this point, began to display some of those alert and analytical qualities of mind that had made her father one of the great railroad men of his day. For an instant she had turned her head slightly at Bob’s avowal—who shall say why? It may be she had felt the blood rush swiftly to her face, but if so a moment later she looked at him with that same icy calm. One hand had tightened on the cold balustrade, but Bob hadn’t noticed that. She plied him now with a number of questions. She kept him on the gridiron and while he wriggled and twisted she stirred up the coals, displaying all the ability of an expert stoker. He was supersensitive about seeing her and yet as a free agent (she thought him that) he had seen her. From her point of view, his mental processes were hopelessly illogical—worse than that. Yet she knew he was possessed of a tolerable mentality and a good-enough judgment for one who had in his composition a slight touch of recklessness.
Miss Gerald, at this point, began to show some of those sharp and analytical qualities that had made her father one of the great railroad tycoons of his time. For a moment, she slightly turned her head at Bob’s confession—who can say why? It might be that she felt her face flush, but a moment later, she looked at him with that same icy calm. One hand had tightened on the cold railing, but Bob didn’t notice that. She now bombarded him with a series of questions. She kept him on the hot seat, and while he squirmed and twisted, she stirred the flames, showing all the skill of an expert stoker. He was overly sensitive about seeing her, yet as a free agent (she considered him that), he had seen her. From her perspective, his thought processes were utterly illogical—worse than that. Yet she knew he had a decent mind and enough judgment for someone with a hint of recklessness in his nature.
“I give it up,” she said at length wearily.
“I give up,” she said wearily after a while.
“Do you? Oh, thank you!” exclaimed Bob gratefully. “And if your aunt orders me from the place—”
“Do you? Oh, thank you!” Bob said gratefully. “And if your aunt tells me to leave—”
“But why can’t you just go, if you want to? I’m sure no one will detain you.” Haughtily.
“But why can’t you just leave if you want to? I’m sure no one will stop you.” Haughtily.
“Can’t explain, only it’s impossible. Like Prometheus bound to the rock for vultures to peck at, unless—”
“Can’t explain, just that it’s impossible. Like Prometheus tied to the rock for vultures to peck at, unless—”
“How intelligible! And what a happy simile—under the circumstances!” with far-reaching scorn. “What if I should tell my aunt that her guest compared himself to—?”
“How clear! And what a great comparison—given the circumstances!” with deep sarcasm. “What if I told my aunt that her guest compared himself to—?”
“That’s the idea!” returned Bob enthusiastically. “Tell her that! Then, by jove, she would—Promise me! Please!”
“That’s the idea!” Bob replied excitedly. “Tell her that! Then, for sure, she would—Promise me! Please!”
“Of course,” said the girl slowly, “my diagnosis must be wrong.” Or perhaps she meant that she had lost faith in that glitter-theory.
“Of course,” the girl said slowly, “my diagnosis must be wrong.” Or maybe she meant that she had lost faith in that glitter theory.
“If you only could understand!” burst from Bob explosively. It was nature calling out, protesting against such a weight of anguish.
“If you only could understand!” Bob exclaimed, bursting out. It was nature crying out, protesting against such a heavy burden of pain.
But Miss Gerald did not respond. A statue could not have appeared more unaffected and unsympathetic. She had half turned as if to go; then she changed her mind and lingered. It annoyed her to feel she had been baffled, for she was a young woman who liked to drive right to the heart of things. Her father had been called a “czar” in his world, and she had inherited, with other of his traits, certain imperious qualities. So for a moment or two she stood thinking.
But Miss Gerald didn’t respond. A statue couldn’t have seemed more indifferent and unsympathetic. She had half turned as if to leave; then she changed her mind and stayed. It frustrated her to feel like she had been puzzled, because she was a young woman who liked to get straight to the point. Her father had been referred to as a “czar” in his world, and she had inherited, along with some of his traits, certain commanding qualities. So for a moment or two, she stood there deep in thought.
An automobile from the village went by them and proceeded to the house. It contained Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence returning from the telegraph office, but Bob hardly saw it, or was aware who were its occupants. Miss Gerald absorbed him to the exclusion of all else now. He had no mind for other storms that might be gathering. Suddenly the girl turned on him with abrupt swiftness.
An car from the village drove past them and headed to the house. It had Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence coming back from the telegraph office, but Bob barely noticed it or recognized who was inside. Miss Gerald had his full attention now. He didn’t think about any other problems that might be brewing. Suddenly, the girl faced him with quick intensity.
CHAPTER VIII—NEW COMPLICATIONS
“Is your father’s embarrassment serious?” she asked.
“Is your dad’s embarrassment serious?” she asked.
Bob looked startled. He didn’t like the way she had shifted the conversation. “Pretty bad,” he answered.
Bob looked surprised. He didn’t like how she had changed the topic. “Pretty bad,” he replied.
“I believe, though, it’s customary for men on the ‘street’ not to stay ‘downed,’ as they say?”
“I believe, though, it’s common for guys on the ‘street’ not to stay ‘down,’ as they say?”
“Don’t know as it’s an invariable rule,” returned Bob evasively. Then realizing it wouldn’t do to be evasive: “As a matter of fact, I don’t believe I’m very well posted as to that,” he added.
“I'm not sure if it’s a fixed rule,” Bob replied vaguely. Then realizing being vague wouldn’t help: “Actually, I don’t think I’m very informed about that,” he added.
“What does your father say?” she asked abruptly.
“What does your dad say?” she asked abruptly.
Bob would much rather not have talked about that with her. But—“Dad says there is no hope,” he had to say.
Bob really didn’t want to talk about that with her. But—“Dad says there’s no hope,” he had to say.
Miss Gerald was silent for a moment. As a child she remembered a very gloomy period in her own father’s career—when the “street” had him “cornered.” She remembered the funereal atmosphere of the big old house—the depression on nearly every one’s face—how everything had seemed permeated with impending tragedy. She remembered how her father looked at her, a great gloomy ghost of himself with somber burning eyes. She remembered how seared and seamed his strong and massive face had become in but a few days. But that was long ago and he had long since left her for good. The vivid impression, however, of that gloomy period during her childhood remained with her. It had always haunted her, though her father had not been “downed” in the end. He had emerged from the storm stronger than ever.
Ms.
The girl shot a sidewise look at Bob, standing now with his arms folded like Hamlet. Perhaps he had come from such a funereal house as she, herself, so well remembered? Had dad’s trouble, or tragedy, weighed on him unduly? Had it made him—for the moment—just slightly irresponsible? Miss Gerald, as has been intimated, had frankly liked Bob as an outdoor companion, or an indoor one, too, sometimes, for that matter. He was one of the few men, for example, she would “trot” with. He could “trot” in an eminently respectful manner, being possessed of an innate refinement, or chivalry, which certainly seemed good to her, after some of those other wild Terpsichorean performances of myriad masculine manikins in the mad world of Milliondom.
The girl glanced sideways at Bob, who was now standing with his arms crossed like Hamlet. Maybe he had come from a gloomy place, just like the one she remembered so well? Had her dad’s issues or tragedy affected him too much? Had it made him, at least for a moment, a bit irresponsible? Miss Gerald, as mentioned before, had genuinely liked Bob as a companion for outdoor activities, and sometimes even indoor ones. He was one of the few men she would actually “trot” with. He could “trot” in a really respectful way, possessing a natural refinement or chivalry that definitely appealed to her after some of those wild dance performances by various men in the crazy world of the wealthy.
“I suppose your father has taken his trouble much to heart?” Miss Gerald now observed.
“I guess your dad has really taken this to heart?” Miss Gerald now noted.
“Not a bit.”
“Not at all.”
“No?” In surprise.
"Really?" in surprise.
“No.”
“No.”
“Why not?”
"Why not?"
“Said he looked to me to keep him in affluence the rest of his days.”
“Said he looked to me to keep him wealthy for the rest of his life.”
“To you?”
"To you?"
“That’s right.”
“Exactly.”
“But how?—What are you going to do?”
“But how?—What are you planning to do?”
“Hustle.”
“Grind.”
“At what?”
"At what time?"
“Don’t know. Got to find out.”
“Not sure. Need to figure it out.”
“What did you plan doing, when at college?”
“What did you plan to do when you were in college?”
“Nothing.”
"Nothing."
“Is it”—Miss Gerald got back to where she had been before—“the sense of awful responsibility,” with slight sarcasm, “that has turned your brain?”
“Is it”—Miss Gerald returned to her previous point—“the feeling of terrible responsibility,” with a hint of sarcasm, “that has driven you crazy?”
“I’m not crazy.”
“I’m not insane.”
“No?” She remembered that most people in asylums say that.
“No?” She recalled that most people in mental health facilities say that.
“Though I may be in a matter of three weeks,” Bob added, more to himself than to her.
“Even though it could be just three weeks,” Bob said, more to himself than to her.
“Why three weeks?”
“Why 3 weeks?”
“Well, if I don’t—just shouldn’t happen to go crazy during that time, I’ll be all right, after that.”
“Well, as long as I don’t—just happen to lose my mind during that time, I’ll be fine afterwards.”
“Why do you allow a specified period for your mental deterioration?”
“Why do you set a specific time for your mental decline?”
“I didn’t allow it.”
"I didn't let it."
“Who did?”
"Who was it?"
“Can’t tell you.”
"Can't say."
Miss Gerald pondered on this answer. It would seem as if Bob had “hallucinations,” if nothing worse. He was possessed of the idea, no doubt, that he would go crazy within three weeks. He didn’t realize that the “deterioration,” she referred to, might have already begun. He looked normal enough, though, had the most normal-looking eyes. Could it be that he was acting? And if he was acting, why was he? That seemed incomprehensible. Anyhow, it couldn’t be a sense of responsibility that had “upset” Bob. She became sure of that now. He played a losing game with too much dash and brilliancy! Hadn’t she seen him at polo—hadn’t she held her breath and thrilled when he had “sailed in” and with irresistible vim snatched victory out of defeat? No; Bob wasn’t a “quitter.”
Miss Gerald thought about this answer. It seemed like Bob was experiencing some sort of “hallucinations,” if not something worse. He was likely convinced that he would go crazy within three weeks. He didn’t realize that the “deterioration” she mentioned might have already started. He looked completely normal, though, with the most ordinary-looking eyes. Could it be that he was just putting on an act? And if he was acting, why was he doing it? That didn’t make sense. Anyway, it couldn’t be a sense of responsibility that had “upset” Bob. She was sure of that now. He played a losing game with too much flair and talent! Hadn’t she seen him at polo—hadn’t she held her breath and felt excited when he had “sailed in” and with unstoppable energy turned defeat into victory? No; Bob wasn’t a “quitter.”
“So your father looks to you to support him?”
“So your dad looks to you for support?”
“So he said. The governor’s a bit of a joker though, you know. He may be only putting up a bluff to try me out.”
“So he said. The governor's kind of a joker, you know. He might just be putting on a bluff to test me.”
“What did he advise you to do?”
“What did he tell you to do?”
Bob shivered. “Matrimonial market.”
Bob shivered. “Marriage market.”
“You mean—?”
"You mean—?"
“Heiress.” Succinctly.
“Rich girl.”
“Any particular one?”
“Any specific one?”
“Dad did mention a name.”
“Dad mentioned a name.”
“Not—?” She looked at him.
“Not—?” She glanced at him.
“Yes.”
"Yeah."
An awful pause.
An awkward silence.
“Now you know why I didn’t want to see you,” said Bob, in that even fatalistic voice. “First place, I wouldn’t ask you to marry me, if you were the last girl in the world! Second place, I was afraid if I saw you, some of these things dad said to try me, would be bound to pop out. You mustn’t think badly of dad, Miss Gerald. As I’ve said, he didn’t mean a word of it. He was only sizing me up. Don’t I know that twinkle in his eye? Just wanted to see if I’m as lazy and good-for-nothing as some chaps brought up with the silver spoon. Why, he’d—honestly, dad would just kick me, if I took his advice. Why, if I went back home to-morrow,” went on Bob, warming to the subject, “and told him we were engaged”—the girl moved slightly—“and were going to be married right off”—the girl moved again—“why—why, old as I am, dad would take off his coat and give me a good trouncing. That’s the kind of a man dad is. I see it all now.”
“Now you know why I didn’t want to see you,” Bob said, in that strangely resigned tone. “First, I wouldn’t ask you to marry me, even if you were the last girl on Earth! Second, I was worried that if I saw you, some of the things Dad said to challenge me would definitely slip out. You shouldn’t think badly of Dad, Miss Gerald. Like I said, he didn’t mean any of it. He was just trying to gauge me. Don’t I recognize that glint in his eye? He just wanted to see if I’m as lazy and useless as some guys who grew up with a silver spoon in their mouths. Honestly, he’d—Dad would straight-up give me a good beating if I actually took his advice. If I went home tomorrow,” Bob continued, getting more animated, “and told him we were engaged”—the girl shifted slightly—“and that we were going to get married right away”—the girl moved again—“well—well, even at my age, Dad would take off his coat and give me a serious talking to. That’s just the kind of guy Dad is. I see it clearly now.”
He really believed he did—and for the first time. He felt he had solved the mystery of dad’s manner and conduct. It had been a mystery, but the solution had come to him like an inspiration. Dad wanted to see whether he would arise to the occasion. He had told him he didn’t believe he was worth his salt just to see his backbone stiffen. He had alluded to that other way of repairing the “busted family credit” just to observe the effect on Bob. And how dad must have chuckled inwardly at Bob’s response! Why, they’d almost had a scene, he and good old dad. Bob could smile at it now—if he could smile at anything. He certainly had been a numskull. Dad, pulling in fish somewhere, was probably still chuckling to himself, and wondering how Bob would work out the problem.
He really thought he did—and for the first time. He felt he had figured out the mystery of Dad’s behavior and attitude. It had been a mystery, but the answer came to him like a burst of inspiration. Dad wanted to see if he would rise to the challenge. He had told him he didn’t think he was worth much just to see him stand up for himself. He had hinted at that other way of fixing the “damaged family reputation” just to see how Bob would react. And how Dad must have laughed inside at Bob’s reaction! They almost had a showdown, he and good old Dad. Bob could smile about it now—if he could smile about anything. He certainly had been a fool. Dad, out fishing somewhere, was probably still chuckling to himself and wondering how Bob would figure out the problem.
“Dad was always just like that when I was a boy,” he confided to Miss Gerald, now standing more than ever like a marble lady in the moonlight. “He would propose the contrariest things! Always trying and testing me. Guess that’s why he acted so happy when he went broke. Thought it would make a man of me! By jove, that’s it! Why, he was as care-free as a boy with a new top!”
“Dad was always like that when I was a kid,” he told Miss Gerald, who now looked even more like a marble statue in the moonlight. “He would suggest the most ridiculous things! Always challenging and pushing me. I guess that’s why he seemed so happy when he lost everything. He thought it would make a man out of me! That’s it! Honestly, he was as carefree as a kid with a new toy!”
“Was he, indeed?” said Miss Gerald, studying Mr. Robert Bennett with eyes that looked very deep now, beneath the imperious brows. “How nice!” Oh, that tone was distant. It might have been wafted from one who stood on an iceberg.
“Was he, really?” said Miss Gerald, looking at Mr. Robert Bennett with eyes that seemed very deep now, beneath her commanding brows. “How nice!” Oh, that tone felt distant. It could have come from someone standing on an iceberg.
“Isn’t it?” Bob heaved a sigh. “I’m not afraid of you any more,” he said, “now that I’ve got that off my chest.”
“Isn’t it?” Bob sighed. “I’m not scared of you anymore,” he said, “now that I’ve said what I needed to.”
Again Miss Gerald shivered slightly, but whether at the slang or not, was not apparent.
Again, Miss Gerald shivered slightly, but it wasn’t clear if it was because of the slang or not.
“You can’t frighten me any more,” said Bob.
“You can't scare me anymore,” Bob said.
“But why,” said Miss Gerald, “did you tell me, at all, of dad’s—as you call him—charming suggestion?”
“But why,” said Miss Gerald, “did you even tell me about dad’s—your words—great suggestion?”
“Had to. Didn’t you ask me?” In faint surprise. Then he remembered she didn’t know he had to tell the truth. That made him look rather foolish—or “imbecile,” in the light of all those other proceedings. Miss Gerald’s brow contracted once more. Again she might be asking herself if Master Robert was acting? Was this but gigantic, bombastic, Quixotic “posing” after all? It was too extraordinary to speak of such things as he had spoken of, to her! Did he only want to appear different? Did he seek to combine Apollo with Bernard Shaw in his attitude toward society? Or had he been reading Chesterton and was he but striving to present in his own personality a futurist’s effect of upside-downness? Miss Gerald felt now the way she had at the modernists’ exhibition, when she had gazed and gazed at what was apparently a load of wood falling down-stairs, and some one had told her to find the lady. It was about as difficult to-night to find the real Mr. Bennett—the happy-go-lucky Bob Bennett of last month or last week—as it had been to find that lady where appeared only chaotic kindling wood.
“Had to. Didn’t you ask me?” she said, surprised. Then he remembered she didn’t know he had to tell the truth. That made him feel a bit foolish—or “idiot,” given all those other events. Miss Gerald frowned again. She might be wondering if Master Robert was acting. Was this just a big, dramatic, Quixotic “show” after all? It was too strange to talk about the things he had talked about with her! Did he just want to seem different? Was he trying to mix Apollo with Bernard Shaw in his views on society? Or had he been reading Chesterton and was he just trying to create an upside-down effect with his personality? Miss Gerald now felt like she had at the modernists’ exhibition when she stared at what looked like a pile of wood tumbling down the stairs, and someone told her to find the lady. It was just as hard tonight to find the real Mr. Bennett—the carefree Bob Bennett from last month or last week—as it had been to find that lady among what was just chaotic firewood.
Miss Gerald let the cool air fan her brow for a few moments. This young man was, at least, exhilarating. She felt a little dizzy. Meanwhile Bob looked at her with that sad silly smile.
Miss Gerald let the cool air blow against her forehead for a few moments. This young man was, at least, exciting. She felt a little lightheaded. Meanwhile, Bob looked at her with his foolish, sad smile.
“You can’t ask me any questions that will disconcert me now,” he boasted.
“You can't ask me any questions that will throw me off now,” he bragged.
Miss Gerald looked at him squarely. “Will you marry me?” she said.
Miss Gerald looked at him directly. “Will you marry me?” she asked.
It was a coup. Her father had been capable of just such coups as that. He would hit the enemy in the most unexpected manner in the most unexpected quarter, and thus overwhelm his foes. Miss Gerald might not mean it; she, most likely, only said it. Under the circumstances, to get at the truth herself, she was justified in saying almost anything. If he were but posing, she would prick the bubble of his pretense. If those grandiloquent, and, to her, totally unnecessary protestations didn’t mean anything, she wished to know it. He would never, never marry her,—wouldn’t he? Or, possibly, her question was but part of a plan, or general campaign, on her part, to test his sanity? Six persons—real competents, too!—had affirmed that he wasn’t “just right.” Be that as it may, Miss Gerald dropped this bomb in Master Bob’s camp and waited the effect with mien serene.
It was a power move. Her father was known for pulling off maneuvers like that. He would strike the enemy in the most surprising way and from the most unexpected place, catching them off guard. Miss Gerald might not have meant it; she probably just said it. Given the situation, she was justified in saying almost anything to uncover the truth. If he was just pretending, she would burst the bubble of his facade. If those grand, unnecessary declarations didn’t mean anything, she wanted to find out. He would never, ever marry her—would he? Or maybe her question was just part of a plan to test his sanity? Six people—real experts, too!—had claimed he wasn’t “quite right.” Whatever the case, Miss Gerald dropped this bomb in Master Bob’s territory and waited for the impact with a calm expression.
Her query worked the expected havoc, all right. Bob’s jaw fell. Then his eyes began to flash with a new fierce love-light. He couldn’t help it. Marry her?—Great Scott!—She, asking him, if he would? He felt his pulses beating faster and the blood pumping in his veins. His arms went out—very eager, strong, primitive arms they looked—that cave-man kind! Arms that seize resistless maidens and enfold them, willy-nilly! Miss Gerald really should have felt much alarmed, especially as there was so much doubt as to Bob’s sanity. It’s bad enough to be alone with an ordinary crazy man, but a crazy man who is in love with one? That is calculated to be a rather unusual and thrilling experience.
Her question definitely caused the expected chaos. Bob's jaw dropped. Then his eyes lit up with a fierce new love. He couldn't help it. Marry her?—Goodness!—She was asking him if he would? He could feel his heart racing and the blood pumping in his veins. His arms reached out—very eager, strong, almost primitive arms—they looked like something from the Stone Age! Arms that grab women and wrap around them without hesitation! Miss Gerald really should have felt quite alarmed, especially considering the uncertainty about Bob's sanity. It's one thing to be alone with an ordinary crazy man, but a crazy man who loves you? That’s bound to be a pretty unusual and exciting experience.
However, though Miss Gerald may have entertained a few secret fears and possible regrets for her own somewhat mad precipitancy, she managed to maintain a fair semblance of composure. She had the courage to “stand by” the coup. She was like a tall lily that seems to hold itself unafraid before the breaking of the tempest. She did not even draw back, though she threw her head back slightly. And in her eyes was a challenge. Not a love challenge, though Bob could not discern that! His own gaze was too blurred.
However, even though Miss Gerald might have had some hidden fears and possible regrets about her somewhat reckless decision, she was able to keep a good appearance of calm. She had the guts to “stand by” the bold move. She was like a tall lily that stands strong, unafraid in the face of an approaching storm. She didn’t even flinch, although she did tilt her head back slightly. And in her eyes was a challenge. Not a romantic challenge, though Bob couldn’t see that! His own view was too clouded.
Miss Gerald suddenly drew in her breath quickly, as one who felt she would need her courage now. Almost had Bob, in that moment of forgetfulness, drawn her into his arms and so completed the paradoxical picture of himself, when the impulse was abruptly arrested. He seemed suddenly to awaken to a saner comprehension of the requirements of the moment. His arms fell to his side.
Miss Gerald suddenly took a quick breath, as if she knew she would need her courage now. Almost in that moment of forgetfulness, Bob had drawn her into his arms and completed the contradictory picture of himself, when the impulse was suddenly stopped. He seemed to wake up to a clearer understanding of what the moment required. His arms dropped to his side.
“That’s a joke, of course,” he said hoarsely.
"That's a joke, obviously," he said hoarsely.
“And if it wasn’t?” she challenged him. There was mockery now in her eyes, and her figure had relaxed.
“And what if it wasn’t?” she challenged him. There was now a hint of mockery in her eyes, and her posture had relaxed.
“You affirm it isn’t?”
"You say it isn't?"
“I said if it wasn’t?”
“I said if it wasn’t?”
“I guess you win,” said Bob wearily. These extremes of emotion were wearing on the system.
“I guess you win,” Bob said wearily. These extremes of emotion were taking a toll on him.
“You mean you wouldn’t, even if I had really, actually—?”
“You mean you wouldn’t, even if I really—?”
“I mean you certainly do know how to ‘even up’ with a chap. When he doesn’t dare dream of heaven, you suddenly pretend to fling open the golden gates and invite him to enter.”
“I mean you really know how to 'even things out' with a guy. When he wouldn’t even dare to dream of heaven, you suddenly act like you’re throwing open the golden gates and inviting him in.”
“Like St. Peter,” said the girl.
“Like St. Peter,” said the girl.
“Ah, you are laughing,” said Bob bitterly, and dropped his head. Her assurance was regal. “As if it wasn’t hard enough, anyway, to get you out of my darn-fool head,” he murmured reproachfully.
“Ah, you are laughing,” Bob said bitterly, dropping his head. Her confidence was majestic. “As if it wasn’t hard enough to get you out of my stupid head,” he murmured, filled with reproach.
“Then you reject me?” said the girl, moving toward the entrance. “Good! I mean, bad! So humiliating to have been rejected! Good night, Mr. Bennett. No—it isn’t necessary for you to accompany me to the house. I really couldn’t think of troubling you after your unkind refusal to—”
“Then you’re rejecting me?” the girl said, walking toward the entrance. “Great! I mean, awful! It’s so humiliating to be turned down! Good night, Mr. Bennett. No—it’s fine, you don’t need to walk me home. I really couldn’t put you out after your rude refusal to—”
Bob groaned. “I say, there is always your aunt, you know, who can ask me to vacate the—” he called out.
Bob groaned. “Hey, there’s always your aunt, you know, who can ask me to leave the—” he called out.
“I’ll think about it,” said the lady. A faint perfume was wafted past him and the vision vanished. Bob sank down on the cold marble seat.
“I’ll think about it,” said the lady. A light scent drifted past him and the vision disappeared. Bob sat down on the cold marble seat.
He remained thus for some time, oblivious to the world, when another car, en route from the village to the house, purred past him, spitting viciously, however, between purrs. Bob didn’t even look around. Spit!—spit!—purr!—purr!—Its two lights were like the eyes of some monster pussy-cat, on the war-path for trouble. Spit!—it seemed in a horribly vicious mood. More “spits” than “purrs,” now! Then the car stopped, though it was some distance from the house.
He stayed like that for a while, completely unaware of his surroundings, when another car, traveling from the village to the house, rolled by him, growling angrily between its smooth sounds. Bob didn’t even glance over. Spit!—spit!—purr!—purr!—Its headlights looked like the eyes of a huge cat ready for a fight. Spit!—it seemed to be in a really bad mood. More “spits” than “purrs” now! Then the car halted, although it was still a ways from the house.
“Curse this old rattletrap!” said a man’s voice.
“Curse this old heap!” said a man’s voice.
“Oh, I guess no one’ll pay any attention to it,” spoke another occupant. “Besides, it was the only one to be had at the station, and we had to get here quick.”
“Oh, I don't think anyone will pay any attention to it,” said another person there. “Besides, it was the only one available at the station, and we needed to get here fast.”
“You bet! The quicker, the better,” observed a third man.
“You got it! The sooner, the better,” said a third man.
They all got out, not far from where Bob sat in the dark gazing into a void, but he did not notice. Cars might come, and cars might go, for all of him. He was dimly aware of the sound of voices but he had no interest in guests, newly-arrived or otherwise. One of the trio paid the driver of the car and it purred back, somewhat less viciously, from whence it came.
They all got out, not far from where Bob sat in the dark staring into space, but he didn’t notice. Cars might come and go, but he didn’t care. He was vaguely aware of the sound of voices, but he had no interest in the guests, whether they were new arrivals or not. One of the group paid the driver, and the car smoothly pulled away, a bit less harshly than before.
“Better separate when we get near the house and approach it carefully,” said the first speaker in low tense tones. “We’ve got to get hold of him without anybody knowing it.”
“Let’s split up as we get close to the house and approach it carefully,” the first speaker said in a low, tense voice. “We need to grab him without anyone finding out.”
“That’s right. Wouldn’t do to let them”—with significant accent—“know what we’ve come for,” said the second man. The trio were quite out of ear-shot of Bob, by now.
“That’s right. Wouldn’t be smart to let them”—with strong emphasis—“know what we’re after,” said the second man. The three of them were far out of earshot of Bob by now.
“Hope it’ll turn out all right,” spoke the third anxiously. “Why, in heaven’s name, didn’t we think of this in the first place?”
“Hope it turns out okay,” said the third one nervously. “Why on earth didn’t we think of this to begin with?”
“Can’t think of every contingency!” answered the first speaker viciously. “Our plan now is to get hold of one of the servants. A nice fat tip, and then—Come on! No time to waste!”
“Can't think of every possible scenario!” replied the first speaker angrily. “Our plan now is to get in touch with one of the staff. A nice big tip, and then—Let's go! No time to waste!”
As they made their way up the driveway to the house Bob looked drearily around. His eyes noted and mechanically followed the trio of dark forms. He saw them stop near the house; then he observed one approach a side window and peer in. A moment later another approached another window and peered in.
As they walked up the driveway to the house, Bob looked around with a sense of gloom. His eyes automatically tracked the three dark figures. He saw them stop near the house; then he noticed one of them go up to a side window and look inside. A moment later, another one approached a different window and peered in.
“That’s funny!” thought Bob, without any particular emotion. At the same time, he recalled that a band of burglars had been going about, looting country-houses. Perhaps these fellows were after a few hundred thousand dollars’ worth of jewels? There might be half a million dollars’ worth of jewelry sprinkled about among Mrs. Ralston’s guests. But what did it matter? The presence of these intruders seemed too trifling a matter to think about now, and Bob sank into another reverie.
“That’s funny!” Bob thought, feeling pretty neutral. At the same time, he remembered that a group of thieves had been breaking into country homes. Maybe these guys were after a few hundred thousand dollars' worth of jewelry? There could be half a million dollars' worth of gems scattered among Mrs. Ralston’s guests. But what did it matter? The presence of these intruders seemed too trivial to worry about right now, and Bob drifted into another daydream.
How long he remained thus, he did not know. The laughter and talk of a number of guests, coming out the front way (end of a “trot,” probably) aroused him and Bob got up.
How long he stayed like that, he didn’t know. The laughter and chatter of a group of guests coming out the front way (probably the end of a "trot") brought him back to reality, and Bob stood up.
As he did so, he fancied he saw again the three men he had noticed, then forgotten, slip around toward the back of the house. Throughout the gardens, the moonlight made clear spots on the ground where the bright rays sifted through the foliage or shone down between the trees, and they had to skip across one of these bright places to get around somewhere behind the big mansion. Undoubtedly, the appearance from the house of the guests who wanted to cool off had startled the intruders and inspired a desire to make themselves less conspicuous for the time being. Bob entertained a vague impression that the conduct of the trio was rather crude and amateurish, though that didn’t worry him. He didn’t care whether they were full-fledged yeggmen of the smoothest class, or only bungling artists, a discredit to their profession. He dismissed consideration of them as quickly again as he had done before.
As he did this, he thought he saw the three men he had noticed and then forgotten, sneaking around to the back of the house. The moonlight illuminated spots on the ground where the bright rays filtered through the leaves or shone down between the trees, and they had to jump across one of these bright areas to get around to the back of the big mansion. It was clear that the sight of the guests coming out to cool off had startled the intruders and made them want to blend in for a while. Bob had a vague feeling that the trio's behavior was pretty clumsy and inexperienced, but it didn't concern him. He didn't care if they were skilled criminals or just incompetent wannabes, not worthy of their profession. He pushed thoughts of them aside as quickly as he had before.
A yawn escaped his lips, and it rather surprised him that a broken-hearted man could yawn. He looked at his watch, holding it in the moonlight, and saw that it was late enough now so that he could retire if he wished, without violating, to any great degree, that even-tenor-of-his-way clause. Accordingly Bob got up and walked toward the house. A side door was open and he went in that way and up to his room. He was glad he didn’t encounter any one—that is, any one he had to speak to. The monocle-man drifted by him somewhere, but Bob didn’t have to pay much attention to him. He could imagine the superior way in which the Britisher had informed Miss Gerald that he found him (Bob) an “interesting young man.” The monocle-man and the bishop seemed to agree on that point.
A yawn slipped out, and he was surprised that a heartbroken guy could yawn. He checked his watch in the moonlight and realized it was late enough that he could go to bed if he wanted to, without really breaking his usual routine. So, Bob got up and headed toward the house. A side door was open, so he went in that way and climbed up to his room. He was relieved he didn’t run into anyone—well, anyone he had to talk to. The monocle guy passed him by, but Bob didn’t have to focus on him. He could picture the condescending way the British guy had told Miss Gerald that he found Bob an “interesting young man.” The monocle guy and the bishop seemed to agree on that.
Undressing hastily, Bob flung himself into bed. He had gone through so much he was tired and scarcely had he touched the sheets when the welcoming arms of Morpheus claimed him. His sleep was sound—very sound! In fact, it was so sound that something occurred and he didn’t know it. It occurred again—several times—and still he did not know it. Another interval!—a long one! Bob yet slept the sleep of the overwrought. His fagged brain was trying to readjust itself. He could have slept right through to the dawn, but this was not to be. Long before the glowing god made its appearance in the east, Bob was rudely yanked from the arms of Morpheus.
Undressing quickly, Bob threw himself into bed. He had been through so much that he was exhausted, and barely touched the sheets when the cozy arms of sleep took him. His sleep was deep—very deep! In fact, it was so deep that something happened and he didn’t notice it. It happened again—several times—and he still didn’t notice. Another interval!—a long one! Bob continued to sleep the sleep of the overwhelmed. His tired mind was trying to reset itself. He could have slept all the way until dawn, but that wasn’t going to happen. Long before the bright sun rose in the east, Bob was harshly pulled from the arms of sleep.
CHAPTER IX—ANOTHER SURPRISE
Three men were in his room and Bob found himself sitting up in bed and blinking at them. The lights they had turned on seemed rather bright.
Three men were in his room, and Bob found himself sitting up in bed, blinking at them. The lights they had turned on were really bright.
“Hello!” said Bob.
"Hey!" said Bob.
“Hello yourself!” said the commodore in a low but nasty manner. “And not so loud!”
“Hello to you too!” the commodore said in a low but harsh tone. “And keep it down!”
“Some sleeper, you are!” spoke Dickie in a savage whisper.
“Some sleeper, huh?” Dickie said in a harsh whisper.
“Believe he heard, all right!” came Clarence’s hushed, unamiable tones. “Perverse beast, and pretended not to!”
“Believe he heard, sure!” came Clarence’s low, unfriendly voice. “Twisted creature, and acted like he didn’t!”
Bob hugged his knees with his arms. “You’ve torn your pants,” he observed to the commodore.
Bob hugged his knees with his arms. “You’ve ripped your pants,” he pointed out to the commodore.
“Never you mind that” as guardedly, though no more pleasantly than before.
“Don’t worry about that” said cautiously, although not any more kindly than before.
“Oh, all right,” said Bob meekly. He didn’t ask any questions, nor did he exhibit any curiosity. There couldn’t anything happen now that would make matters much worse. But in that, he was “reckoning without his host.”
“Oh, fine,” Bob said quietly. He didn’t ask any questions or show any curiosity. There wasn’t anything that could happen now that would make things much worse. But in that, he was “reckoning without his host.”
“Got in the window, of course,” he observed in a low unconcerned tone, as if their coming and being there after midnight was the most natural occurrence in the world. “Not so hard to get in, with that balcony out there. All you had to do was to ‘shin up’ and then there’s that trellis to help. Good strong trellis, too. Regular Jacob’s ladder! Easiest thing for burglars! Thought you were burglars,” he added contemplatively.
“Of course, they got in through the window,” he noted in a calm, indifferent tone, as if their arrival at midnight was the most ordinary thing ever. “It’s not hard to get in with that balcony right there. All you had to do was climb up, and then there’s that trellis to help you out. It’s a sturdy trellis, too. Like a real Jacob’s ladder! It’s super easy for burglars! I thought you were burglars,” he added, reflecting.
“You mean you saw us?” snapped the commodore, almost forgetting his caution. His expression matched his tone. He was no longer the jovial sailorman; he wore now a regular Dick Deadeye look. To Bob’s comprehensive glance he appeared like a fragment in a revival of Pinafore.
“You mean you saw us?” snapped the commodore, almost forgetting his caution. His expression matched his tone. He was no longer the cheerful sailor; now he had a real Dick Deadeye look. To Bob’s keen eye, he seemed like a leftover from a revival of Pinafore.
“Oh, I didn’t know it was you,” said Bob.
“Oh, I didn’t realize it was you,” said Bob.
“Where were you?”
"Where were you at?"
“Summer-house.”
"Summer home."
“Think of that,” murmured the commodore, disgustedly. “Bird at hand, and we didn’t know it. Fool of a bird had to hop away and make us all this trouble!”
“Think about that,” the commodore muttered, disgusted. “We had the bird right here, and we didn’t even realize it. Stupid bird had to fly off and cause us all this trouble!”
“I told you I thought you were burglars,” observed Bob patiently. He didn’t care how they abused him or what names they called him.
“I told you I thought you were thieves,” Bob said calmly. He didn't mind how they insulted him or what names they called him.
That disagreeable look on Dan’s face was replaced by a startled one. “Good gracious, man”—only that wasn’t the expression he used—“I hope you haven’t told any one you saw burglars prowling around? Nice for us if you did!” As he spoke he gazed anxiously toward the window, before which they had taken the precaution to draw a heavy drape after entering.
That unpleasant look on Dan’s face changed to a surprised one. “Oh my goodness, man”—but that wasn’t the phrase he used—“I hope you haven’t told anyone you saw burglars lurking around? That would be great for us!” As he spoke, he nervously looked toward the window, in front of which they had made sure to pull a heavy curtain after entering.
“No, I didn’t tell a soul.”
“No, I didn’t tell anyone.”
“But—I don’t understand why you didn’t when you thought—?”
“But—I don’t get why you didn’t when you thought—?”
“I ought to have spoken, I suppose,” said Bob with a melancholy smile. “But it didn’t seem very important and—I guess I forgot. These little jewel robberies are getting to be such commonplace occurrences!”
"I guess I should have said something," Bob said with a sad smile. "But it didn't seem like a big deal and—I guess I just forgot. These little jewel thefts are starting to feel so ordinary!"
The commodore stared at him. Then he touched his forehead. “A lot of trouble you’ve made for us,” he said, speaking in that low tense voice, while Clarence and Dickie looked on in mad and reproachful fashion. “Bribed a servant to tell you to slip out! Told him to whisper that we were waiting in the garden and simply had to see you at once! Didn’t you hear him rap on your door?”
The commodore looked at him intently. Then he touched his forehead. “You’ve caused us a lot of trouble,” he said in a low, tense voice while Clarence and Dickie watched with a mix of anger and disappointment. “You bribed a servant to tell you to sneak out! You had him whisper that we were waiting in the garden and needed to see you immediately! Didn’t you hear him knock on your door?”
“No,” answered Bob sorrowfully.
“No,” Bob replied sadly.
“Heavens, man! believe you’d sleep through an earthquake and cyclone combined! Servant came back and told us he’d tapped on your door as loudly as he dared. Was afraid he’d arouse the whole house if he knocked louder. When you leave a ‘call’ at the hotels, how do they manage? Break down the door with an ax?”
“Heavens, man! Do you really think you’d sleep through an earthquake and a cyclone together? The servant came back and said he knocked on your door as loudly as he could. He was worried he’d wake up the whole house if he knocked any harder. When you leave a wake-up call at hotels, how do they handle it? Do they break down the door with an axe?”
Bob overlooked the sarcasm. The commodore might have thumped him with an ax, at the moment, and he wouldn’t have protested very hard. He murmured a contrite apology.
Bob ignored the sarcasm. The commodore could have hit him with an axe right then, and he wouldn’t have complained much. He quietly offered an apologetic remark.
“Get my telegram?” said the commodore.
“Did you get my telegram?” said the commodore.
“Yes. What could you have been thinking about when you sent it? How could I leave when I had to stay? Thought you must have been sailing pretty close in the wind at the yacht club, when you dashed it off! Could just feel your main-sail fluttering.”
“Yes. What were you thinking when you sent it? How could I leave when I had to stay? I figured you must have been living dangerously at the yacht club when you wrote it! I could almost feel your main sail flapping.”
The commodore swore softly but effectively. Clarence and Dickie murmured something, too. Bob hugged his knees closer. Being so unhappy himself, he couldn’t but feel a dull sympathy when he saw any one else put out.
The commodore cursed quietly but with impact. Clarence and Dickie muttered something as well. Bob pulled his knees closer. Feeling so miserable himself, he couldn’t help but feel a vague sympathy when he saw anyone else upset.
“See here,” said the commodore, “what’s the situation? We never dreamed, of course, that you would come here. Have you been talking with Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence? Dickie’s been conjuring all kinds of awful things you might have told them, if they cornered you and you got that truth-telling stunt going. Dickie’s got an imagination. Too confounded much imagination!” Here the commodore wiped his brow. That was quite a bad tear in his pants but he appeared oblivious to it. “Maybe you would have thought it a capital way to turn the tables on us poor chaps?” he went on, stabbing Bob with a baleful look. “Perhaps you came here on purpose?”
“Listen,” said the commodore, “what’s going on? We never expected you to show up here. Have you talked to Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence? Dickie’s been coming up with all sorts of terrible things you might have said to them if they pressured you and you started telling the truth. Dickie has quite the imagination—way too much of it!” The commodore wiped his brow. There was quite a noticeable tear in his pants, but he seemed completely unaware of it. “Maybe you thought it would be a clever way to turn the tables on us?” he continued, giving Bob a sharp look. “Did you come here on purpose?”
“No,” said Bob, “I couldn’t have done that, of course, owing to the conditions.” And he related what had happened to bring him there.
“No,” Bob said, “there's no way I could have done that, considering the circumstances.” Then he explained what had happened to get him there.
Dan groaned. “Why, it was we, ourselves, who steered him right up against her at the Waldorf. It was we who got him asked down here. I suppose you’ve been chuckling ever since you came?” Turning on Bob, with a correct imitation of Mr. Deadeye, at his grouchiest moment.
Dan groaned. “It was us who brought him right up to her at the Waldorf. We’re the ones who got him invited down here. I guess you’ve been laughing ever since you arrived?” He turned to Bob, mimicking Mr. Deadeye at his grouchiest moment.
“No,” said Bob, speaking to immeasurable distance, “I haven’t done any chuckling since I came here. Nary a chuckle!”
“No,” said Bob, speaking to an immeasurable distance, “I haven’t laughed at all since I got here. Not even a chuckle!”
“Let’s get down to brass tacks,” interrupted Dickie, “and learn if our worst apprehensions are realized. There’s a girl down here I think a lot of and I’d like to know if, by any chance, any conversation you may have had with her turned on me. I allude to Miss Dolly—”
“Let’s get to the point,” interrupted Dickie, “and find out if our worst fears are true. There’s a girl here I care a lot about, and I’d like to know if, by any chance, any conversation you had with her was about me. I’m talking about Miss Dolly—”
“Hold on,” said the commodore. “That’s not very important. Suppose she should have found out a few things about you? You aren’t married. It’s different in the case of married men, like Clarence and me here. We’ll dismiss Miss Dolly, if you please, for the present—”
“Wait a minute,” said the commodore. “That’s not really important. What if she learned a few things about you? You aren’t married. It’s different for married men, like Clarence and me here. Let’s set aside Miss Dolly for now, if you don’t mind—”
“I really haven’t said anything to Miss Dolly about you,” said Bob to Dickie. “Your name hasn’t been mentioned between us.” He was glad he could reassure one of them, at least. He wouldn’t have had Dickie so sorrowful as himself for the world.
“I really haven’t said anything to Miss Dolly about you,” Bob told Dickie. “Your name hasn’t come up at all between us.” He was relieved he could at least comfort one of them. He wouldn’t want Dickie to be as sad as he was for anything.
That young man looked immensely relieved. It may be he experienced new hope of leading the temperamental young thing to the altar, and incidentally consummating a consolidation of competing chimneys, conveniently contiguous. “Thanks, old chap,” he said, and shook Bob’s hand heartily.
That young man looked really relieved. Maybe he felt a new sense of hope about getting the spirited young woman to marry him, and at the same time, merging their overlapping interests seamlessly. “Thanks, my friend,” he said, shaking Bob’s hand warmly.
“But what about us?” whispered the commodore sibilantly. “Have you talked with Mrs. Clarence or Mrs. Dan to any great extent?”
“But what about us?” the commodore whispered softly. “Have you talked with Mrs. Clarence or Mrs. Dan much?”
“I haven’t had hardly a word with Mrs. Clarence,” answered Bob, whereupon Clarence began to “throw out his chest,” the way Dickie had done.
“I barely had a word with Mrs. Clarence,” replied Bob, at which point Clarence started to puff out his chest, just like Dickie had done.
The commodore shifted uneasily, seeming to find difficulty in continuing the conversation. He moved back and forth once or twice, but realizing he was making a slight noise, stood still again, and looked down at Bob.
The commodore shifted awkwardly, seeming to struggle to keep the conversation going. He paced back and forth a couple of times, but noticing he was making a bit of noise, he stopped again and looked down at Bob.
“Talk much with Mrs. Dan?” he at length asked nervously.
“Have you talked a lot with Mrs. Dan?” he finally asked nervously.
“I did have a little conversation with Mrs. Dan,” Bob was forced to reply. “Or, I should say, to be strictly truthful, rather a long conversation. You see, I took her in to dinner.”
“I actually had a bit of a chat with Mrs. Dan,” Bob had to say. “Or, to be completely honest, it was more of a lengthy conversation. You see, I brought her in for dinner.”
The commodore showed signs of weakness. He seemed to have very indecisive legs all of a sudden. “Talk about me?” he managed to ejaculate.
The commodore showed signs of weakness. He seemed to have very wobbly legs all of a sudden. “Are you talking about me?” he managed to say.
“Some. I’m not certain just how much.”
“Some. I’m not exactly sure how much.”
“What—what was said?”
"What was said?"
“I can’t remember all. It’s very confused. I’ve had a lot of conversations, you see, and most of them awfully unpleasant. I remember, though, that Mrs. Dan impressed me as a very broad-minded lady. Said she had lived in Paris, and was not a bit jealous.”
“I can’t remember everything. It’s really confusing. I’ve had a lot of conversations, you know, and most of them were pretty uncomfortable. I do remember that Mrs. Dan seemed like a very open-minded lady. She said she had lived in Paris and wasn’t jealous at all.”
“What!” Dan was breathing hard.
“What!” Dan was out of breath.
“Said she always wanted you to have the best kind of a time.”
“She always said she wanted you to have the best time.”
“Did she say that?” asked the commodore. “And you believed it? Go on.” In a choked voice. “Did you tell her about that cabaret evening?”
“Did she say that?” asked the commodore. “And you actually believed it? Go on.” He said in a choked voice, “Did you tell her about that cabaret evening?”
“I believe it was mentioned, incidentally.”
“I think it was mentioned, by the way.”
“Say I was there?” put in Clarence quickly. He was losing that “chestiness.”
“Say I was there?” Clarence interjected quickly. He was losing that sense of confidence.
“I rather think I did. I—what is that?” Bob looked toward the window. There was a sound below at the foot of the balcony. Some one turned out the light in the room and Bob strode to the window and looked out. “It’s a dog,” he said. “He’s snuffing around at the foot.”
“I think I did. I—what is that?” Bob looked toward the window. There was a noise down at the foot of the balcony. Someone turned off the light in the room, and Bob walked over to the window to look outside. “It’s a dog,” he said. “He’s sniffing around at the bottom.”
“He’s doing more than snuffing,” observed the commodore apprehensively, as at that moment a bark smote the air. They stood motionless and silent. The dog stopped barking, but went on snuffing. Maybe it would go away after a moment, and they waited. Dickie and the commodore had thrashed out that question of dogs. With so many guests around, they had figured that, of course, they would be dog-safe. Didn’t they look like guests? How could a dog tell the difference between them and a guest? It is true, they hadn’t been expecting so much trouble as they had been put to, to find Bob. They had, in that little balcony-climbing feat, rather exceeded what they had expected to be called on to do. In their impatience, they had acted somewhat impetuously, but it had looked just as easy, after the servant had pointed out the room and told them Bob was in, as certain sounds from his bed indubitably indicated.
“He’s doing more than sniffing,” the commodore said nervously, just as a dog barked loudly. They stood still and silent. The dog stopped barking, but continued sniffing. Maybe it would leave after a moment, so they waited. Dickie and the commodore had discussed the issue of dogs. With so many guests around, they had figured it would be fine to be near them. Didn’t they look like guests? How could a dog tell the difference between them and a guest? It’s true, they hadn’t anticipated the trouble they faced while trying to find Bob. They had, in that little climbing stunt, definitely gone beyond what they thought they would have to do. In their impatience, they acted a bit rashly, but it had seemed easy once the servant pointed out the room and said Bob was in there, as certain sounds from his bed clearly suggested.
They couldn’t very well enter the house as self-invited guests, though they, of course, would have been made welcome. They couldn’t very well say they had all changed their minds about those original invitations which had naturally included husbands as well as wives. After all three had declined to come on account of business, it would certainly look like collusion, if all three found they hadn’t had urgent business, at all, in town. If anything untoward or disastrous had happened in the conversational line, with Bob as the Demon God, Truth, their sudden entrance upon the stage of festivities, would seem to partake of inner perturbation; it might even appear to be a united and concentrated case of triple guilty conscience. This, obviously, must be avoided at any cost. How they had heard Bob was here at the Ralston house, matters not. Naturally they had kept tab on his movements, where he went and what he did being of some moment to them.
They couldn’t just walk into the house as uninvited guests, even though they definitely would have been welcomed. They couldn’t claim that they had all changed their minds about those original invitations that had obviously included both husbands and wives. After all three had said they couldn’t come because of work, it would look suspicious if all three suddenly revealed they didn’t have any urgent business in town at all. If anything awkward or terrible had happened in the conversation, with Bob being the embodiment of Truth, their sudden arrival at the party would seem out of place; it might even come off as an obvious sign of a shared guilty conscience. This, clearly, had to be avoided at all costs. How they found out Bob was at the Ralston house doesn’t really matter. They had naturally kept track of his movements, since where he went and what he did was important to them.
The dog barked again. Thereupon, a window opened and they knew that some one had been aroused.
The dog barked again. Then, a window opened, and they realized that someone had been awakened.
“He’s looking out. It’s the monocle-chap,” whispered Bob.
“He's looking out. It's the guy with the monocle,” whispered Bob.
“Who’s he?”
“Who is he?”
“One of Mrs. Ralston’s importations. Belonged to that Anglo-English colony when she did that little emigration act in dear old London.”
“One of Mrs. Ralston’s imports. It belonged to that Anglo-English community when she made that little move from dear old London.”
“Hang it, we’ve got to get out,” whispered the commodore nervously. No matter what had been said; no matter what the Demon God of Truth had done, it was incumbent on them not to remain longer, with that dog looking up toward Bob’s window and making that spasmodic racket. Some one might get up and go out and see footprints, or a disturbed trellis. The commodore forgot a certain desperate business proposition, apropos of that confounded wager, he had come to put to Bob. That infernal dog got on his nerves and put that other matter, which would settle this truth-telling stunt at once, right out of his mind.
“Let’s get out of here,” whispered the commodore nervously. No matter what had been said; no matter what the Demon God of Truth had done, they couldn’t stay any longer with that dog staring up at Bob’s window and making that irritating noise. Someone might wake up, go outside, and see footprints or a messed-up trellis. The commodore completely forgot about a certain urgent business proposition related to that annoying wager he had come to discuss with Bob. That damn dog was getting on his nerves and made him forget all about the other issue that could resolve this truth-telling situation once and for all.
It was all very well, however, to say they “had to get out,” but it was another matter to tell how they were going to do it. They couldn’t descend the way they had come, and meet doggie. Bob arose to the occasion.
It was easy to say they “had to get out,” but figuring out how to actually do it was a different story. They couldn’t go back the way they came and run into the dog. Bob stepped up to the challenge.
“I can let you into the hall and show you downstairs, to that side door on the other side of the house. You can take one of my golf sticks, just as a safeguard, but I think you’ll be able to circumvent the jolly little barker without being obliged to use it.”
“I can let you into the hall and show you downstairs, to that side door on the other side of the house. You can take one of my golf clubs, just as a precaution, but I think you’ll be able to get past the cheerful little dog without having to use it.”
“What kind of a dog is it?” whispered the commodore who had a pronounced aversion to canines.
“What kind of dog is it?” whispered the commodore, who had a strong dislike for dogs.
“Looked like a smallish dog. Might be a bull.”
“Looked like a small dog. Might be a bull.”
“Better give us each a club,” suggested Clarence in a weak voice.
“Maybe we should each get a club,” suggested Clarence in a soft voice.
Which Bob did. The dog renewed the vocal performance, and— “Hurry,” whispered the commodore. “Find means to communicate with you to-morrow, Mr. Bennett.” Bob didn’t resent the formality of this designation, which implied to what depths he had fallen in good old Dan’s estimation. “Can we get down-stairs without any one hearing us?”
Which Bob did. The dog started barking again, and— “Hurry,” whispered the commodore. “Find a way to communicate with you tomorrow, Mr. Bennett.” Bob didn’t mind the formality of this title, which showed just how low he had sunk in good old Dan’s opinion. “Can we get downstairs without anyone hearing us?”
Bob thought they could. Anyhow, they would have to try, so he opened the door softly and led the way. Fortunately, the house was solidly built and not creaky. They attained down-stairs safely, and at last reached the side door without causing any disturbance. Bob unfastened the door, the key turned noiselessly and they looked out. There was no sign of any living thing on lawn or garden on this side of the house.
Bob thought they could. Anyway, they would have to try, so he quietly opened the door and took the lead. Thankfully, the house was well-built and didn’t make any noise. They got downstairs safely and finally reached the side door without making a sound. Bob unlocked the door, the key turned silently, and they looked outside. There was no sign of any living thing on the lawn or in the garden on this side of the house.
“Out you go quickly,” murmured Bob, glancing apprehensively over his shoulder. His position was not a particularly agreeable one. Suppose one of the servants, on an investigating tour as to the cause of doggie’s perturbation, should chance upon him (Bob) showing three men out of the house in that secret manner at this time of night?
“Get out quickly,” whispered Bob, looking nervously over his shoulder. His situation was pretty uncomfortable. What if one of the servants, checking into what was causing the dog’s disturbance, stumbled upon him showing three men out of the house secretly at this time of night?
But before disappearing into the night, the commodore took time to whisper: “Was Gee-gee’s name mentioned?”
But before vanishing into the night, the commodore took a moment to whisper, “Was Gee-gee’s name mentioned?”
“I fear so,” said Bob sadly.
"I think so," Bob said sadly.
The commodore wasted another second or two to tell Bob fiercely what he thought of him and how they would “fix” him on the morrow, after which he sprang out and darted away like a rabbit.
The commodore took a moment to tell Bob angrily what he thought of him and how they would "handle" him tomorrow, after which he jumped out and ran away like a rabbit.
Bob wanted to call out that they were welcome to “fix” him, but he was afraid that others beside Dan might hear him, so he closed and locked the door carefully and stood there alone in the great hall, in his dressing-gown. Then he sat down in a dark corner and listened. Better wait until all was quiet, he told himself, before retracing his steps to his room. The dog seemed to have stopped barking altogether now and soon any persons it might have awakened would be asleep again. His trio of visitors must be well on their way to the village by this time, he thought. He was sorry the commodore seemed to feel so bad. And Clarence?—poor Clarence! That last look of his haunted Bob. Anyhow, he was pleased Dickie had, so far, escaped his (Bob’s) devastating touch.
Bob wanted to shout out that they were welcome to “fix” him, but he was worried that someone besides Dan might overhear him, so he carefully closed and locked the door and stood there alone in the great hall, in his robe. Then he sat down in a dark corner and listened. He decided it was better to wait until everything was quiet before heading back to his room. The dog seemed to have stopped barking entirely now, and soon anyone it might have woken would be asleep again. He figured his trio of visitors must be well on their way to the village by now. He felt sorry that the commodore seemed to be feeling so bad. And Clarence?—poor Clarence! That last look he gave haunted Bob. Anyway, he was glad Dickie had, so far, avoided his (Bob’s) devastating influence.
How long he sat there he did not know. Probably only a few moments. A big clock ticked near by, which was the only sound now to be heard. Suddenly it occurred to him that he had better return to his room, and wearily he arose. Up-stairs it seemed darker than it had been when he had left his room. He had the dim lights in the great hall below to guide him then. Now it was a little more difficult. However, after traversing without mishap a few gloomy corridors—he realized what a big house it really was—he reached, at last, his room near the end of one of the upper halls and entered.
How long he sat there, he didn't know. Probably just a few moments. A big clock ticked nearby, which was the only sound to be heard now. Suddenly, it hit him that he should head back to his room, and he wearily got up. Upstairs, it seemed darker than it had when he left his room. He had the dim lights in the big hall below to guide him back then. Now it was a bit more challenging. However, after navigating a few gloomy corridors without any problems—he realized how big the house really was—he finally reached his room near the end of one of the upper halls and went inside.
He had a vague idea he had left his door partly ajar, but he wasn’t sure; probably he hadn’t, for it was now closed; or maybe a draft of air had closed it. Groping his way in the dark for his bed, he ran against a chair. This ruffled his temper somewhat as the sharp edge had come in contact with that sensitive part of the anatomy, known as the shin-bone. He felt for his bed, but it wasn’t there where it ought to be. He must have got turned around coming in. His fingers ran over a dresser. Some of the articles on it seemed strange to him. He thought he heard a rustle and stood still, with senses alert, experiencing a regular burglar-feeling at the moment. He hadn’t become so ossified to emotion as he had supposed. But everything was now as silent as the grave. Again his hand swept out, to learn where he was, and again his fingers swept over the dresser. What were all those confounded things? He didn’t know he had left so much loose junk lying around. And where was that confounded switch-button?
He had a hazy feeling that he had left his door partly open, but he wasn't certain; he probably hadn't, since it was now closed; or maybe a draft had pushed it shut. As he fumbled in the dark for his bed, he bumped into a chair. This irritated him a bit because the sharp edge had collided with that sensitive part of the body known as the shin. He reached out for his bed, but it wasn't where it was supposed to be. He must have turned around while coming in. His fingers brushed against a dresser. Some of the items on it felt unfamiliar to him. He thought he heard a noise and froze, with his senses heightened, feeling a typical burglar-type anxiety at that moment. He hadn't become as numb to emotions as he thought. But everything was as quiet as the grave. Again, his hand extended to figure out where he was, and once more, his fingers traveled over the dresser. What were all those annoying things? He had no idea he had left so much clutter lying around. And where was that annoying light switch?
At that moment some one else found it, for the room became suddenly flooded with light. Bob started back, and as he did so, something fell from the dresser to the floor. He stared toward the bed in amazement and horror. Some one, with the clothes drawn up about her, was sitting up. Bob wasn’t the only one who had a surprise that night. The temperamental, little dark thing was treated to one, too. Above the white counterpane, she stared at Bob.
At that moment, someone else discovered it, and the room was suddenly filled with light. Bob jumped back, and as he did, something fell from the dresser to the floor. He looked over at the bed in shock and fear. Bob wasn't the only one who was caught off guard that night. The feisty little dark-haired girl got a surprise as well. Above the white bedspread, she stared at Bob.
CHAPTER X—INTO BONDAGE
She continued to stare for some moments, while he stood frozen to the spot. Then the young lady’s face changed. Fear, startled wonder, gave way to an expression of growing comprehension and into her eyes came such an excited look.
She kept staring for a few moments, while he stood frozen in place. Then the young woman’s face shifted. Fear and surprise turned into a look of increasing understanding, and her eyes sparkled with excitement.
“You!” said Miss Dolly in a thrilling whisper. And then—“Pick it up, please.”
“You!” said Miss Dolly in an exciting whisper. And then—“Please pick it up.”
Instead of picking anything up—he didn’t know what—Bob was about to rush for the door, when— “Stop! Or I’ll scream,” exclaimed Miss Dolly. “I’ll scream so loud I’ll wake every one in the house.”
Instead of grabbing anything—he didn’t know what—Bob was about to dash for the door when— “Stop! Or I’ll scream,” shouted Miss Dolly. “I’ll scream so loud I’ll wake everyone in the house.”
Bob stopped. In his eyes was an agony of contrition and shame. Miss Dolly, however, seemed quite self-possessed. She might have been frightened at first, but she was no longer that. Her temperamental, somewhat childish face wore a thrill of pleasurable anticipation. “Now pick it up,” she repeated.
Bob stopped. In his eyes was a painful mix of regret and shame. Miss Dolly, however, seemed perfectly composed. She might have been scared at first, but that feeling was gone now. Her expressive, somewhat childish face showed a tingle of excited anticipation. “Now pick it up,” she repeated.
“What?” stammered Bob in a shrinking voice.
“What?” Bob stammered, his voice getting quieter.
“The brooch, to be sure. Didn’t you drop it?”
“The brooch, for sure. Didn’t you drop it?”
“I?” said Bob, drawing his dressing-gown closer about him. They were speaking in stage whispers.
“I?” said Bob, pulling his robe tighter around him. They were talking in hushed tones.
“Of course. Wasn’t it what you came for?”
“Of course. Isn't that what you came for?”
“Came for? Great heavens!—Do you think?—”
“Came for? Oh my gosh!—Do you really think?—”
“Think?” said Miss Dolly. “I know.”
“Think?” Miss Dolly replied. “I know.”
Bob looked at her. Her face appeared elf-like, uncannily wise. But for all her outward calm, her eyes were great big, excited eyes. His horrified glance turned quickly from them to regard a gleaming diamond and pearl brooch on the rug. “Jumping Je-hoshaphat! You don’t think I’m—”
Bob looked at her. Her face looked almost like an elf’s, strangely wise. But despite her calm exterior, her eyes were wide and full of excitement. His shocked gaze quickly shifted from them to a sparkling diamond and pearl brooch on the rug. “Jumping Jehoshaphat! You don’t think I’m—”
“One of those thrilling society-highwaymen, or social buccaneers?” said Miss Dolly. “Of course, and I’m so glad it happened like this. I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Really, I’ve always wanted to meet one of those popular heroes. And now to think my dream has come true! It’s just like a play, isn’t it?”
“One of those thrilling society outlaws, or social adventurers?” said Miss Dolly. “Of course, and I’m so glad it turned out this way. I wouldn’t have missed it for anything. Honestly, I’ve always wanted to meet one of those popular heroes. And now to think my dream has come true! It’s just like a play, isn’t it?”
“It is not,” replied Bob savagely. This was too much. It was just about the last straw. “I—” Then he stopped. Suppose any one should hear him? Miss Dolly’s temperamental and comprehensive eyes read his thought.
“It’s not,” Bob snapped back angrily. This was too much. It was just about the last straw. “I—” Then he paused. What if someone heard him? Miss Dolly’s keen and perceptive eyes picked up on his thought.
“I don’t think there’s any danger,” she purred soothingly. “You see there’s a bathroom on one side of the room and a brick wall on the other. I wouldn’t be surprised if all the rooms are separated by brick partitions,” she confided to him. “Mrs. Ralston likes everything perfect—sound-proof, fire-proof, and all that.”
“I don’t think there’s any danger,” she said in a calming voice. “You see, there’s a bathroom on one side of the room and a brick wall on the other. I wouldn’t be surprised if all the rooms are divided by brick walls,” she shared with him. “Mrs. Ralston likes everything to be perfect—soundproof, fireproof, and all that.”
“See here,” said Bob. “I was just wandering around—couldn’t sleep—and—and I came in here, quite by mistake. Thought it was my own room!” With some vehemence.
“Hey,” said Bob. “I was just wandering around—couldn’t sleep—and—I accidentally came in here. I thought it was my own room!” He said this with some intensity.
Miss Dolly shook her head reprovingly, and her temperamental hair flowed all about her over the white counterpane. She knew it must look very becoming, it was such wonderful hair—that is, for dark hair. Bob preferred light. Not that he was thinking of hair, now! “Can’t you do better than that?” asked the temperamental young thing.
Miss Dolly shook her head disapprovingly, and her moodily flowing hair spread across the white bedspread. She knew it must look very flattering; it was such amazing hair—at least for dark hair. Bob liked light hair. Not that he was focused on hair at the moment! “Can’t you do better than that?” asked the moody young woman.
“Better than what?” queried Bob ill-naturedly. He was beginning to feel real snappy.
“Better than what?” Bob asked irritably. He was starting to feel really snappy.
“Invent a better whopper, I mean?”
"Come up with a better whopper, right?"
“It isn’t a whopper, and—and I positively refuse to stay here any longer. Positively!”
“It’s not a big deal, and—and I absolutely refuse to stay here any longer. Absolutely!”
“Oh, no; not positively,” said Miss Dolly, nodding a wise young head. “You’re going to stay, unless—you know the alternative. Since I’m destined to be a heroine, I want a regular play-scene. I don’t want my part cut down to nothing. Don’t you love thief-plays, Mr. Bennett? It’s such fun to see people running around, not knowing who is the thief. I’m sure I feel quite privileged, in this instance.”
“Oh, no; definitely not,” said Miss Dolly, nodding her wise young head. “You’re going to stay, unless—you know what happens if you don’t. Since I’m meant to be a heroine, I want a proper dramatic scene. I don’t want my role reduced to nothing. Don’t you love thief stories, Mr. Bennett? It’s so much fun to watch people running around, not knowing who the thief is. I really do feel quite special, in this case.”
Bob growled beneath his breath. He was handsome enough certainly for a matinee hero. He was tall and lithe and had such clean-cut features. The temperamental young thing regarded him with thrilling approval. He entirely realized her ideal of a social burglar. It seemed almost too good to be true.
Bob muttered under his breath. He was definitely good-looking enough to be a matinee idol. He was tall and lean, with sharp features. The dramatic young woman looked at him with excited approval. He completely embodied her idea of a charming thief. It almost seemed too good to be true.
“I knew you were different from other men,” she said. “Something told me from the very first; perhaps it was the way you tangoed. I expected you would ask me to trot, but you didn’t.” Reprovingly. “Suppose you were otherwise engaged?” Glancing toward the brooch.
“I knew you were different from other guys,” she said. “I sensed it right from the start; maybe it was the way you danced the tango. I thought you’d ask me to join, but you didn’t.” She said this with a hint of disapproval. “What if you had something else going on?” She glanced at the brooch.
“Not the way you think!” said Bob gloomily, looking more striking than ever in that melancholy pose. It seemed to harmonize with a crime-stained career.
“Not the way you think!” Bob said glumly, looking more striking than ever in that sad pose. It seemed to fit with a life of crime.
“Of course,” murmured Dolly, “it was you who got Mrs. Templeton Blenfield’s wonderful emeralds?”
“Of course,” whispered Dolly, “you were the one who got Mrs. Templeton Blenfield’s amazing emeralds?”
“It was not,” answered Bob curtly.
"It wasn't," Bob replied bluntly.
“You were at that costume ball where she lost them?”
“You were at that costume party where she lost them?”
“Suppose I was?” he snapped. Yes, snapped! There is a limit to human endurance.
“Suppose I was?” he snapped. Yes, he really snapped! There’s only so much a person can take.
“And you were at Mrs. Benton Briscoe’s when a tiara mysteriously disappeared?”
“And you were at Mrs. Benton Briscoe’s when a tiara mysteriously went missing?”
“Well, I’m hanged!” said Bob, staring at her.
“Well, I'm shocked!” said Bob, staring at her.
“Oh, I hope not—that is, I hope you won’t be, some day,” answered Dolly. “Are you going to ‘fess up?’ You’d better. Maybe I won’t betray you—yet. Maybe I won’t at all, if you’re real nice.”
“Oh, I hope not—that is, I hope you won’t be someday,” Dolly replied. “Are you going to confess? You should. Maybe I won’t tell anyone—yet. Maybe I won’t at all, if you’re really nice.”
“Oh!” said Bob. Whereupon she smiled at him sweetly, just as if to say it was nice and exciting to have a great, big, bold (and wildly handsome) society-highwayman in her power. Why, she could send him to jail, if she wanted to. She had but to lift a little finger and he would have to jump. The consciousness of guilty knowledge and power she possessed made her glow all over. She didn’t really know though, yet, whether she would be kind or severe.
“Oh!” said Bob. She smiled at him sweetly, almost as if to say it was nice and exciting to have a big, bold (and ridiculously handsome) highwayman at her mercy. She could send him to jail if she wanted to. All she had to do was lift a little finger, and he would have to obey. The realization of her guilty knowledge and power made her feel alive. However, she still wasn’t sure whether she would be kind or tough.
“Do you operate alone, or with accomplices?” she asked, after a few moments’ pleasurable anticipations.
“Do you work alone, or do you have partners?” she asked, after a few moments of enjoyable anticipation.
“I beg pardon?” Bob was again gazing uneasily toward the door.
“I beg your pardon?” Bob was once again looking nervously at the door.
“Got any pals?” She tried to talk the way they do in the thief-books.
“Got any friends?” She tried to speak like they do in the crime novels.
“No, I haven’t,” snapped Bob. That truth pact made it necessary to answer the most silly questions.
“No, I haven’t,” Bob snapped. That truth pact made it mandatory to answer even the most ridiculous questions.
“Well, I didn’t know but you had,” murmured the temperamental young thing. “I heard a dog barking and that made me think you might have them. You’re sure you didn’t let anybody into the house?”
“Well, I didn’t know that you had,” whispered the moody young woman. “I heard a dog barking and that made me think you might have them. Are you sure you didn’t let anyone into the house?”
“I didn’t.”
"I didn't."
Miss Dolly snuggled herself together more cozily. She seemed about to ask some more questions. Perhaps she would want to know if he had let anybody out, and then he would have to tell her—
Miss Dolly cuddled up more comfortably. She looked like she was about to ask more questions. Maybe she would want to know if he had let anyone out, and then he would have to tell her—
“Look here,” said Bob desperately. “Maybe it hasn’t occurred to you, but—this—this isn’t exactly proper. Me here, like this, and you—”
“Look here,” said Bob desperately. “Maybe you haven’t thought about it, but—this—this isn’t exactly right. Me here, like this, and you—”
“Oh, I’m not afraid,” answered Miss Dolly with wonderful assurance. “I can quite take care of myself.”
“Oh, I’m not scared,” replied Miss Dolly with amazing confidence. “I can totally handle myself.”
“But—but—” more desperately—“if I should be discovered?—Can’t you see, for your own sake—?”
“But—but—” more urgently—“what if I get caught?—Can’t you see, for your own good—?”
“My own sake?” The big innocent eyes opened wider. “In that case, of course, I’d tell them the truth.”
"My own sake?" The big innocent eyes widened. "In that case, of course, I'd tell them the truth."
“The truth!” How he hated the word! “You mean that I—?” Glancing toward the brooch.
“The truth!” He hated that word! “You mean that I—?” He glanced over at the brooch.
“Of course!” Tranquilly.
"Of course!" Calmly.
Bob tried to consider. He could see what would happen to him, if they were interrupted. It certainly was a most preposterous conversation, anyhow. Besides, it wasn’t the place or the time for a conversation of any kind. He had just about made up his mind that he would go, whether she screamed or not, and take the consequences, however disagreeable they might be, when—
Bob tried to think. He could see what would happen to him if they were interrupted. It was definitely a ridiculous conversation, anyway. Besides, it wasn’t the right place or time for any kind of talk. He had almost decided that he would leave, whether she screamed or not, and face the consequences, no matter how unpleasant they might be, when—
“Well, trot along,” said Miss Dolly graciously. “I suppose you’ve got a lot of work to do to-night and it’s rather unkind to detain you. Only pick up the brooch before you go.” He obeyed. “Now put it on the dresser and leave it there. Hard to do that, isn’t it?”
“Well, go on,” Miss Dolly said kindly. “I guess you have a lot of work to do tonight, and it’s a bit rude to keep you here. Just make sure to pick up the brooch before you leave.” He complied. “Now, put it on the dresser and leave it there. That’s a bit tough to do, right?”
“No, it isn’t.” Savagely.
“No, it’s not.” Savagely.
“Well, you can go now. By the way, Mrs. Vanderpool has a big bronze-colored diamond surrounded by wonderful pink pearls. It’s an antique and—would adorn a connoisseur’s collection.”
“Well, you can leave now. By the way, Mrs. Vanderpool has a large bronze-colored diamond surrounded by beautiful pink pearls. It’s an antique and would be a great addition to a collector’s collection.”
“But I tell you I am not—”
“But I’m telling you I’m not—”
“My! How stupid, to keep on saying that! But, of course, you must really be very clever. Society-highwaymen always are. Good night. So glad I was thinking of something else and forgot to lock the door!”
“Wow! How dumb to keep saying that! But, of course, you must be really smart. Society’s highwaymen usually are. Good night. So glad I was thinking of something else and forgot to lock the door!”
Bob went to the door and she considerately waited until he had reached it; then she put out a hand and pushed a convenient button which shut off the light. Bob opened the door but closed it quickly again. He fancied he saw some one out there in the hall, a shadowy form in the distance, but was not absolutely sure.
Bob walked over to the door, and she thoughtfully waited until he got there; then she reached out and pressed a nearby button that turned off the light. Bob opened the door but quickly shut it again. He thought he saw someone in the hallway, a shadowy figure in the distance, but he wasn’t completely sure.
“Aren’t you gone?” said the temperamental young thing.
“Aren’t you leaving?” said the moody young person.
“S-sh!” said Bob.
“Shh!” said Bob.
For some moments there was silence, thrilling enough, even for her. Then Bob gently opened the door once more, though very slightly, and peered out of the tiniest crack, but he failed to see any one now, so concluded he must have been mistaken. The shadows were most deceptive. Anyhow, there was more danger in staying than in going, so he slid out and closed the door. At the same moment he heard a very faint click. It seemed to come from the other side of the hall. He didn’t like that, he told himself, and waited to make sure no one was about. The ensuing silence reassured him somewhat; and the “click,” he argued, might have come from the door he himself had closed.
For a few moments, there was silence, which was exciting enough, even for her. Then Bob gently opened the door again, just a little, and peeked out through the smallest crack, but he didn’t see anyone now, so he figured he must have been wrong. The shadows were really misleading. Anyway, there was more risk in staying than in leaving, so he slipped out and closed the door. At that moment, he heard a very faint click. It seemed to come from the other side of the hall. He didn't like that, he thought to himself, and waited to make sure no one was around. The following silence calmed him somewhat; and the “click,” he reasoned, might have come from the door he had just closed.
The temperamental young thing, holding her breath, heard him now move softly but swiftly away. She listened, nothing happened. Then she stretched her young form luxuriously and pondered on the delirious secret that was all hers. A secret that made Bob her slave! Abjectly her slave! Like the servant of the lamp! She could compel him to turn somersaults if she wanted to.
The moody young girl, holding her breath, heard him move away quietly but quickly. She listened, but nothing happened. Then she stretched her youthful body luxuriously and thought about the thrilling secret that belonged only to her. A secret that made Bob her slave! Completely her slave! Like the servant of the lamp! She could make him do flips if she wanted to.
Bob awoke with a slight headache, which, however, didn’t surprise him any. He only wondered his head didn’t ache more. People came down to breakfast almost any time, and sometimes they didn’t come down at all but sipped coffee in their rooms, continental-fashion. It was late when Bob got up, so a goodly number of the guests—the exceptions including Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence—were down by the time he sauntered into the big sun-room, where breakfast was served to all with American appetites.
Bob woke up with a slight headache, but that didn't really surprise him. He just wondered why his head didn't hurt more. People came down for breakfast at all different times, and sometimes they didn't come down at all but enjoyed coffee in their rooms, like they do in continental hotels. It was late when Bob finally got up, so quite a few guests were already down by the time he wandered into the big sun room, where breakfast was served to everyone with American appetites.
The temperamental little thing managed accidentally (?) to encounter him at the doorway before he got into the room with the others. He shivered slightly when he saw her, though she looked most attractive in her rather bizarre way. Bob gazed beyond her, however, to a vision in the window. “Vision!” That just described what Miss Gwendoline looked like, with the sunlight on her and making an aureole of her glorious fair hair. Of course one could put an adjective or two, before the “vision”—such as “beautiful,” or something even stronger—without being accused of extravagance.
The temperamental little thing accidentally ran into him at the doorway before he joined the others in the room. He shivered slightly when he saw her, even though she looked quite attractive in her unique way. Bob looked past her, though, toward a sight in the window. “Sight!” That perfectly captured what Miss Gwendoline looked like, with the sunlight shining on her and creating a halo around her beautiful fair hair. Of course, you could add an adjective or two before “sight”—like “stunning” or something even more impressive—without being called over the top.
The little dark thing, uttering some platitude, followed Bob’s look, but she didn’t appear jealous. She hadn’t quite decided how much latitude to give Bob. That young gentleman noticed that the hammer-thrower, looking like one of those stalwart, masculine tea-passers in an English novel, was not far from Miss Gwendoline. His big fingers could apparently handle delicate china as well as mighty iron balls or sledges. He comported himself as if his college education had included a course at Tuller’s in Oxford Street, in London, where six-foot guardsmen are taught to maneuver among spindle-legged tables and to perform almost impossible feats without damage to crockery.
The little dark thing, saying something cliché, followed Bob’s gaze, but she didn’t seem jealous. She hadn’t completely figured out how much freedom to give Bob. That young man noticed that the hammer-thrower, looking like one of those strong, masculine tea servers in a British novel, was close to Miss Gwendoline. His large fingers seemed capable of handling delicate china just as easily as heavy iron balls or sledges. He carried himself as if his college education included a course at Tuller’s on Oxford Street in London, where six-foot guardsmen learn to navigate around slender-legged tables and perform almost impossible tasks without breaking any dishes.
Miss Dolly now maneuvered so as to draw Bob aside in the hall to have a word or two before he got to bacon and eggs. What she said didn’t improve his appetite.
Miss Dolly now skillfully pulled Bob aside in the hallway to chat for a moment before he got to the bacon and eggs. What she said didn’t make him any hungrier.
“I’m so disappointed in you,” she began in a low voice.
“I’m really disappointed in you,” she started in a quiet voice.
He asked why, though not because he really cared to know.
He asked why, not because he actually wanted to know.
“After that hint of mine!” she explained reproachfully. “About Mrs. Vanderpool’s bronze diamond, I mean!”
“After that hint I gave!” she said, sounding a bit annoyed. “About Mrs. Vanderpool’s bronze diamond, I mean!”
“I fear I do not understand you,” said Bob coldly.
“I’m afraid I don’t understand you,” Bob said coldly.
She bent nearer. “Of course I thought it would disappear,” she murmured. “I expected you to execute one of those clever coups, and so I went purposely to Mrs. Vanderpool’s room on some pretext this morning to learn if it was gone. But it wasn’t. I cleverly led the conversation up to it and she showed it to me.”
She leaned in closer. “Of course I thought it would disappear,” she said softly. “I expected you to pull off one of those clever moves, so I intentionally went to Mrs. Vanderpool’s room this morning under some pretext to see if it was gone. But it wasn’t. I skillfully brought up the topic, and she showed it to me.”
“Great Scott!” he exclaimed. “Did you think she wouldn’t have it to show you? That it had found its way to my pockets?”
“Wow!” he exclaimed. “Did you really think she wouldn’t have it to show you? That it ended up in my pockets?”
“Of course,” she answered. “And you are quite sure you haven’t it, after all?” she asked suspiciously.
“Of course,” she replied. “And you are absolutely sure you don’t have it, right?” she asked suspiciously.
“How could I, when you saw—”
“How could I, when you saw—”
“Oh, you might have substituted a counterfeit brooch just like it for—”
“Oh, you might have replaced it with a fake brooch just like it for—”
Bob groaned. “You certainly have absorbed those plays,” he remarked.
Bob groaned. “You’ve definitely taken in those plays,” he said.
“I expected a whole lot of things would be gone,” she went on, “and, apparently,” with disappointment, “no one has missed anything. It’s quite tame. Did you get discouraged because you failed to land the ‘loot’—is that the word?—in my case? And did you then just go prosaically to bed?”
“I thought a lot of things would be missing,” she continued, “but apparently,” with disappointment, “no one has noticed anything. It’s pretty boring. Did you get discouraged because you didn’t get the ‘loot’—is that the right word?—in my situation? And did you just go to bed like it was no big deal?”
“I certainly went to bed, though there was nothing prosaic about the procedure.”
“I definitely went to bed, even though the process was anything but ordinary.”
“And yet what a dull night it must have been for you!”
“And yet, what a boring night it must have been for you!”
“I shouldn’t call it that.”
"I shouldn't call it that."
“No?” She shifted the conversation. “Who do you suppose has come? Dickie Donnelly. Said he had arrived in town on some business and took advantage of the opportunity to make a little call on me. Incidentally, he seems interested in you. Said he would make it a point to see you after you got down. He’s out on the veranda smoking now, I guess. He wanted to talk to me but I made an excuse to shoo him away. He isn’t half so exciting as you are, you know. I’m quite positive now I couldn’t marry him and annex his old chimneys to ours, for all the world. Chimneys are such commonplace means to a livelihood, Mr. Bennett, don’t you think? They are so ugly and dependable. Not at all romantic and precarious! They just smoke and you get richer. There isn’t a single thrill in a whole forest of chimneys. But I mustn’t really keep you from your breakfast any longer,” she added with sudden sedulousness. “I’ve quite planned what we’re going to do to-day.”
“No?” She changed the subject. “Guess who’s here? Dickie Donnelly. He said he came to town for some business and thought he’d drop by to see me. By the way, he seems to be interested in you. He mentioned he’d make sure to see you after you got down. He’s probably out on the veranda smoking right now. He wanted to talk to me, but I made up an excuse to send him away. He’s not nearly as exciting as you are, you know. I’m really convinced now that I couldn’t marry him and attach his old chimneys to ours, not for anything. Chimneys are such an ordinary way to make a living, don't you think? They’re so ugly and reliable. Not romantic or adventurous at all! They just puff smoke and you get richer. There’s not a single thrill in a whole forest of chimneys. But I shouldn’t keep you from your breakfast any longer,” she added suddenly eager. “I’ve got our plans for today all set.”
“You have?” With a slight accent on the first word.
“You have?” with a slight emphasis on the first word.
“Yes,” she assured him quietly. “So run along now.”
“Yes,” she reassured him softly. “So go on now.”
The slave, glad to get away, started to obey, when—“One moment!” said Miss Dolly as if seized with an afterthought. “Dickie asked about you so particularly that it occurred to me that— Well, do you think he harbors any suspicions?”
The slave, happy to escape, began to comply, when—“Wait a second!” said Miss Dolly as if struck by a sudden thought. “Dickie was asking about you so specifically that it made me wonder— Do you think he has any suspicions?”
“Suspicions?”
"Concerns?"
“Yes; do you imagine he, too, by any chance, may have guessed—you know?” And Dolly again drew closer, her eyes beaming with new excitement.
“Yes; do you think he might have guessed—you know?” And Dolly leaned in closer, her eyes shining with excitement.
Bob looked disagreeable, but he had to reply. “I’m sure he doesn’t think what you do,” he answered ill-humoredly.
Bob looked unhappy, but he had to respond. “I’m sure he doesn’t think what you do,” he replied grumpily.
Dolly looked relieved, but still slightly dubious. She didn’t appear to notice that lack of appreciation in Bob’s manner for her interest in his welfare. “Well, you’d better see him,” she said in the tone of one who had already established herself to the post of secret adviser. “He’s bent on an interview with you. Says it’s business. And speaking about business, what business could he possibly have in that dinky little town? Unless he wanted to buy the whole village! His conduct is, to say the least, slightly mysterious. Dickie may prove a factor to be reckoned with.”
Dolly looked relieved, but still a bit unsure. She didn’t seem to notice Bob’s lack of appreciation for her concern about his well-being. “Well, you should definitely see him,” she said with the confidence of someone who had already taken on the role of a secret advisor. “He’s eager to have a meeting with you. Claims it’s about business. And speaking of business, what could he possibly want in that tiny little town? Unless he plans to buy the whole place! His behavior is, to put it mildly, a bit mysterious. Dickie could turn out to be someone to watch out for.”
“That’s true enough,” assented Bob, and went in to breakfast.
"That's definitely true," Bob agreed and went in to have breakfast.
The temperamental little thing gazed after him approvingly; she quite gloried in her big burglar. It was so nice to know something no one else knew, to be a little wiser than all the rest of the world, including the police and the detective force! Bob must be terribly resourceful and subtle, to have deceived them all so thoroughly. He only seemed a little dense at times, just to keep up the deception. It was a part of the role. He wouldn’t even let her, who knew his secret, see under the surface and she liked him all the better for his reticence. It lent piquancy to the situation and added zest to the game. Dickie’s manner had certainly seemed to her unduly sober. He appeared to have something on his mind, though of course he was awfully eager and joyous about seeing her.
The moody little thing watched him with approval; she really thrived on her big burglar. It felt great to know something that no one else knew, to be a bit smarter than the rest of the world, including the police and detectives! Bob must be incredibly clever and sneaky to have fooled them all so completely. He only acted a bit slow at times, just to maintain the disguise. That was part of the act. He wouldn’t even let her, who knew his secret, see what was really going on beneath the surface, and she liked him even more for his secrecy. It made the situation more intriguing and added excitement to the game. Dickie’s attitude definitely seemed overly serious to her. He looked like he had something weighing on his mind, although, of course, he was super eager and happy to see her.
At the breakfast-table Bob only dallied with his hot rolls and took but a few gulps of coffee. The monocle-man who sat near by noticed that want of appetite.
At the breakfast table, Bob only toyed with his hot rolls and took just a few sips of coffee. The man with the monocle sitting nearby noticed his lack of appetite.
“Don’t seem very keen for your feed this morning,” he observed jocularly.
“Looks like you’re not too eager for your breakfast this morning,” he commented playfully.
“No, not over-peckish,” answered Bob.
“No, not too peckish,” answered Bob.
“Why not? You look—aw—fit enough!” Reaching for one of those racks for unbuttered toast which Mrs. Ralston had brought home with her from London.
“Why not? You look—uh—fit enough!” Reaching for one of those racks for unbuttered toast that Mrs. Ralston had brought home with her from London.
“Headache, for one thing,” returned Bob. It was the truth, or part of the truth. No one looked sympathetic, however. In fact, with the exception of the monocle-man (Mrs. Ralston hadn’t yet come down), every one in there made it apparent he or she desired as little as possible of Mr. Bennett’s society. Bob soon got up, casting a last bitter glance at Miss Gerald who seemed quite contented with her stalwart, honest-looking hammer-thrower. And why not? His character, Bob reflected, was unimpeachable. He looked so good and honest and so utterly wholesome that Bob, who himself was tainted with suspicion, wanted to get out of his presence. So Bob went out to the porch, to hunt up Dickie and ascertain what was the matter with him?
“Headache, for one thing,” Bob replied. It was the truth, or at least part of it. No one looked sympathetic, though. In fact, aside from the guy with the monocle (Mrs. Ralston hadn’t come down yet), everyone else there clearly wanted as little as possible to do with Mr. Bennett. Bob soon stood up, giving one last bitter look at Miss Gerald, who seemed totally happy with her strong, honest-looking hammer-thrower. And why not? Bob thought to himself, his character was beyond reproach. He looked so decent and genuine and so entirely wholesome that Bob, who felt a bit suspicious himself, wanted to get away from him. So Bob stepped out to the porch to find Dickie and figure out what was going on with him.
It didn’t take Bob long to learn what was worrying Dickie. He was carrying the weight of a new and tremendous responsibility. He had now become an emissary, a friend in need, to Clarence and the commodore, who certainly needed one at this moment. It seemed that Mrs. Clarence and Mrs. Dan had set detectives searching for Gee-gee and Gid-up and they had succeeded in locating one of the pair, partly by a freckle and a turned-up nose. The detectives must have worked fast. They were assisted by the fact that foolish Clarence had kept up an innocent and Platonic friendship with “Gee-gee’s” chum, after that momentous evening when Bob had been along. Now when a young man begins to hang around the vicinity of a stage door in a big car, he is apt to make himself a subject for remark and to become known, especially to the door-keeper who takes a fatherly interest in his Shetland herd. As Gid-up and Gee-gee were inseparable, it was but a step to place one by the other.
It didn’t take Bob long to figure out what was bothering Dickie. He was dealing with a heavy new responsibility. He had become a messenger, a friend in need, to Clarence and the commodore, who definitely needed one right now. It seemed that Mrs. Clarence and Mrs. Dan had hired detectives to look for Gee-gee and Gid-up, and they had managed to find one of the pair, partly due to a freckle and a turned-up nose. The detectives must have acted quickly. They had the added help from the fact that foolish Clarence had maintained an innocent and platonic friendship with "Gee-gee's" buddy since that significant evening when Bob had been there. Now, when a young man starts hanging around a stage door in a fancy car, he’s likely to attract attention and become known, especially to the doorman who takes a fatherly interest in his Shetland herd. Since Gid-up and Gee-gee were inseparable, it was only a small step to connect them.
Detectives, Dickie informed Bob, had already interviewed the ladies. They may have offered them money in exchange for information. Mrs. Dan was very rich in her own name. She could outbid the commodore. Gid-up might hesitate or refuse to supply or manufacture information for filthy lucre, but Gee-gee was known to be ambitious. She longed to soar. And here was a means to that end. Quite a legitimate and customary one!
Detectives, Dickie told Bob, had already talked to the women. They might have offered them money in exchange for information. Mrs. Dan was very wealthy on her own. She could outbid the commodore. Gid-up might hesitate or refuse to give or create information for dirty money, but Gee-gee was known to be ambitious. She wanted to rise above. And here was a way to do that. Quite a legitimate and usual one!
“Why, that girl would do anything to get herself talked about,” said Dickie sadly, thinking of Dan, and incidentally, too, of Clarence. “She’d manufacture information by the car-load. Out of a little, teeny-weeny remnant of truth, she’d build a magnificent divorce case. Think of the glorious publicity! Why, Gee-gee and one of the manager-chaps would sit up nights to see how many columns they could fill each day in the press. They’d make poor old Dan out worse than Nero. They’d picture him as a monster. They’d give him claws. And Clarence would come crawling after him like a slimy snake. Incidentally, they’d throw in a few weeps for Gee-gee. And then some more for Gid-up! Why, man, when I think of the mischief you’ve done—”
“Honestly, that girl would do anything just to get people talking about her,” Dickie said sadly, thinking of Dan, and also of Clarence. “She’d create stories by the truckload. From a tiny bit of truth, she’d construct a huge divorce scandal. Just think of the amazing publicity! Gee-gee and one of the managers would stay up all night to see how many columns they could fill in the news each day. They’d make poor old Dan look worse than Nero. They’d portray him as a monster. They’d even give him claws. And Clarence would come crawling after him like a slimy snake. And they’d throw in a few tears for Gee-gee. And then some more for Gid-up! Man, when I think of the trouble you've caused—”
“Me?” said Bob miserably, almost overwhelmed by this pathetic picture Dickie had drawn. “But it wasn’t! It was Truth.” Dickie snorted. “What do you want me to do? Commit suicide? Annihilate truth? That would be one way of doing it. I’m sure I shouldn’t much mind. Shall I poison Truth or blow its brains out? Or shall I take it down to the lake and jump in with it? Do you think it has made me very happy? What am I? What have I become? Where is my good name?” He was thinking of what the temperamental little thing considered him. “Say, do I look like a criminal?” he demanded, confronting Dickie. The latter stared, then shrugged. Of course, if Bob wanted to rave—? “Or a crazy man? Do I look crazy?” he continued almost fiercely. “Well, there are people in there,” indicating the house, “who think I am.” Dickie started slightly and looked thoughtful. “You ask the judge, or the doctor, or—a lot of others. Ask Miss Gwendoline Gerald,” he concluded bitterly.
“Me?” Bob said sadly, nearly overwhelmed by the pathetic picture Dickie had drawn. “But it wasn't! It was Truth.” Dickie scoffed. “What do you want me to do? Kill myself? Erase truth? That would be one way to do it. I wouldn't really care. Should I poison Truth or blow its brains out? Or should I take it to the lake and jump in with it? Do you think it’s made me very happy? What am I? What have I become? Where is my good name?” He was thinking about what the temperamental little thing thought of him. “Hey, do I look like a criminal?” he challenged, facing Dickie. Dickie stared, then shrugged. Sure, if Bob wanted to vent—? “Or a crazy person? Do I look crazy?” he continued almost fiercely. “Well, there are people in there,” he pointed to the house, “who think I am.” Dickie jumped slightly and looked thoughtful. “You can ask the judge, or the doctor, or—lots of others. Ask Miss Gwendoline Gerald,” he finished bitterly.
Dickie shifted a leg. “It might not be a bad idea,” he said in a peculiar tone, whose accent Bob didn’t notice, however. For some moments the two young men sat moodily and silently side by side.
Dickie shifted his leg. “It might not be a bad idea,” he said in a strange tone, which Bob didn’t catch. For a few moments, the two young men sat gloomily and silently next to each other.
“Where are Dan and Clarence now?” asked Bob in a dull tone, after a while.
“Where are Dan and Clarence now?” Bob asked flatly after a while.
“Gone to New York. Hustled there early this morning after some hurry-up messages gave an inkling of what was going on. I’m to do my best at this end. Keep my eyes on Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence, and incidentally, learn and do what I can.”
“Gone to New York. Rushed there early this morning after some urgent messages hinted at what was happening. I’m going to do my best here. Keep an eye on Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence, and also, learn and do what I can.”
As he spoke Dickie tapped his leg with his cane; at the same time he bestowed another of those peculiar looks on Bob. Just then a young lady stepped from the house and came toward them. She was in the trimmest attire—for shooting or fishing—and looked extraordinarily trim, herself. A footman followed with two light rods and a basket.
As he talked, Dickie tapped his leg with his cane and shot another one of those strange looks at Bob. Just then, a young woman came out of the house and walked over to them. She was dressed perfectly for shooting or fishing and looked exceptionally put together. A footman followed her, carrying two lightweight rods and a basket.
“Come on,” she said lightly to Bob. “Might as well get started. It’s almost noon.”
“Come on,” she said casually to Bob. “We might as well get started. It’s almost noon.”
“Started?” he stammered, staring at her.
“Started?” he stumbled, looking at her.
“Yes, on that fishing excursion we planned.”
“Yes, on that fishing trip we planned.”
“We?” he repeated in the same tone. And then— “All right!” he said. It occurred to him, if he went off somewhere alone, with the temperamental young thing, he wouldn’t, at any rate, have to bob against a score or so of other people throughout the day. Better one than a crowd! “I’m ready,” he added, taking the rods and small basket.
“‘We?’” he repeated in the same tone. And then— “Fine!” he said. It hit him that if he went off somewhere alone with the moody young woman, he wouldn’t have to deal with a whole bunch of other people all day. Better to be with one person than a crowd! “I’m ready,” he added, grabbing the rods and small basket.
“But, I say—” Dickie had arisen. There was a new look in his eyes—of disappointment, surprise—perhaps apprehension, too! “I say—” he repeated, looking darkly toward Bob.
“But, I say—” Dickie had gotten up. There was a new look in his eyes—of disappointment, surprise—maybe apprehension, too! “I say—” he repeated, looking darkly at Bob.
The temperamental young thing threw him a smile. “Sorry, Dickie, but a previous engagement.—You know how it is!”
The moody young woman flashed him a smile. “Sorry, Dickie, but I have plans already.—You know how it goes!”
“I can imagine,” thought Dickie ominously, watching them disappear. Then his glance shifted viciously toward the house, and there was a look of stern determination in his eyes. As he mingled with others of the guests a few moments later, however, his expression had become one of studied amiability. Dickie was deep. His grievance now was as great as Dan’s or Clarence’s.
“I can imagine,” thought Dickie ominously, watching them disappear. Then his gaze turned sharply toward the house, and there was a look of serious determination in his eyes. A few moments later, as he mingled with the other guests, however, his expression was one of practiced friendliness. Dickie was complicated. His grievance was now as intense as Dan’s or Clarence’s.
CHAPTER XI—FISHING
They had an afternoon of it, Bob and Dolly. Bob made himself useful, if not agreeable. He was a willing though not altogether cheerful slave. But the girl did not appear to mind that. She had spirits enough for both of them and ordered Bob around royally. She was nice to him, but she wanted him to know that he was her property, as much hers as if she had bought him at one of those old human auction sales. Only hers was a white slave!
They spent the afternoon together, Bob and Dolly. Bob did his part, even if he wasn’t the most pleasant company. He was eager to help, even if he didn’t seem too happy about it. But the girl didn’t seem to care. She had plenty of energy for both of them and bossed Bob around like a queen. She was nice to him, but she made sure he understood that he belonged to her, just as if she had bought him at one of those old slave auctions. Only in her case, he was a white slave!
She had the grandest time. She made him help her across the stream on a number of unnecessary occasions, holding the slave’s hand, so that she wouldn’t slip on the slippery stones. And once she had him carry her across. She had to, because there weren’t any stones, slippery or otherwise, she could avail herself of, at that particular spot. It is true she might have gone on a little farther and found some slippery stones that would have served her purpose, but she pretended not to know about them. Besides, what is the use of being a despot and having a private slave, all to yourself, if you don’t use him and make him work? Mr. Bennett wasn’t only a slave either, he was a romantic hero, as well, and in the books, heroes always carry the heroines across streams. Miss Dolly experienced a real bookish feeling when Bob carried her. He fully realized the popular ideal, he had such strong arms. True, he didn’t breathe on her neck, or in her ear, and he grasped her rather gingerly, but she found no fault over that. Her great big hero was a modest hero. But he was very manly and masculine, too.
She had the best time. She made him help her across the stream several times when it wasn't really necessary, holding the guy's hand to avoid slipping on the wet stones. Once, she even had him carry her across. She had to, though, because there weren’t any stones, slippery or not, that she could use at that spot. Sure, she could have walked a little further to find some slippery stones that would have worked, but she acted like she didn’t know about them. Besides, what’s the point of being in charge and having your own private helper if you’re not going to use him and make him work? Mr. Bennett wasn’t just a helper; he was also a romantic hero, and in stories, heroes always carry their heroines across streams. Miss Dolly felt like she was in a story when Bob carried her. He totally fit the popular ideal, with his strong arms. It’s true he didn’t breathe on her neck or whisper in her ear, and he held her kind of gently, but she didn’t mind that at all. Her big hero was just a modest guy. But he was definitely very manly and masculine, too.
He had plunged right in the stream, shoes and all, in spite of her suggestion that he had better take them off. But what cared he for wet feet? Might cause pneumonia, of course; but pneumonia had no terrors for Bob! She smiled at his precipitancy, while secretly approving of it. The act partook of a large gallantry. It reminded her of Sir Walter Raleigh and that cloak episode. Miss Dolly nestled very cozily, en route, with a warm young arm flung carelessly over a broad masculine shoulder and her eyes were dreamy, the way heroines’ eyes are in the books. She was not thinking of chimneys.
He jumped right into the stream, shoes and all, even though she suggested he should take them off. But he didn't care about having wet feet. Sure, it could lead to pneumonia, but that didn't scare Bob! She smiled at his impulsiveness, secretly liking it. His action had a sense of boldness. It reminded her of Sir Walter Raleigh and that cloak story. Miss Dolly snuggled up comfortably, with a warm young arm casually draped over a broad masculine shoulder, her eyes dreamy like a heroine’s in books. She wasn't thinking about chimneys.
On the other side, she sat down, and imperiously—mistresses of slaves are always imperious—bade him take off her shoes. It was doubly exciting to vary the role of heroine with that of capricious slave-mistress. Of course, she might just as well have taken off her shoes on the other side and walked over but she never dreamed of doing that. After the slave had taken off her shoes, she herself removed her stockings, while the slave (seemingly cold and impassive as Angelo’s marble Greek slave) looked away. Then she dabbled her tiny white feet in the cold stream. She was thinking of that Undine heroine. Dabbling her feet, also made her feel bookish. Only in the books the heroes (or slaves) gaze adoringly at said feet. Hers were worth gazing at, but Bob didn’t seem to have eyes. Never mind! She told herself she liked that cold Anglo-Saxon phlegm (what an ugly word!) in a man. She saw in it a foil to her own temperamental disposition.
On the other side, she sat down and confidently—like a mistress of slaves always is—ordered him to take off her shoes. It was even more thrilling to switch between the roles of heroine and playful slave-mistress. Of course, she could have easily taken off her shoes on the other side and walked over, but that thought never crossed her mind. After the slave removed her shoes, she took off her stockings while the slave, looking cold and unfeeling like Angelo's marble Greek slave, looked away. Then she dipped her tiny white feet in the cold stream. She was thinking of that Undine heroine. Dipping her feet also made her feel literary. In the books, the heroes (or slaves) gaze adoringly at said feet. Hers were definitely worth looking at, but Bob didn't seem to notice. Never mind! She told herself she liked that cold Anglo-Saxon indifference (what an ugly word!) in a man. She saw it as a contrast to her own emotional nature.
Having dabbled briefly, she held out a tiny foot and the slave dried it with his handkerchief, looking very handsome as he knelt before her. Then she put out the other and he repeated the operation. Then she put on her shoes and stockings. Then she remembered they had come ostensibly to fish and began whipping the stream spasmodically, while he did the same mechanically. They caught one or two speckled beauties, or Bob did. She couldn’t land hers. They always got tangled in something which she thought very cute of them. She didn’t feel annoyed at all when they got away, but just laughed as if it were the best kind of a joke, while Bob looked at her amazed. She called that“sport.”
Having played around a bit, she extended a tiny foot, and the servant dried it with his handkerchief, looking quite handsome as he knelt in front of her. Then she offered the other foot, and he did the same. After that, she put on her shoes and stockings. Then she remembered they had come mainly to fish, and she started to whip the water awkwardly, while he did it in a routine manner. They caught a couple of beautiful speckled fish, or Bob did. She couldn’t reel hers in. They always got caught on something, which she thought was really cute. She didn’t feel annoyed at all when they got away; she just laughed as if it were the funniest joke, while Bob looked at her in disbelief. She called that “sport.”
Then she made him build a “cunning little fire” on a rock and clean the fish and cook them and set them before her. She graciously let him sit by her side and partake of a few overdone titbits and a sandwich or two they had brought in the basket. But she also made him jump up every once in a while to do something, finding plenty of pretexts to keep him busy. In fact, she had never been more waited upon in her life, which was just what she wanted. Bob, however, didn’t complain, for the minutes and hours went by and she asked no embarrassing questions. She didn’t make herself disagreeable in that respect, and as long as she didn’t, he didn’t mind helping her over rocks, or toting her. At least, this was a respite. His headache wasn’t quite so bad; the fresh air seemed to have helped it.
Then she had him build a “clever little fire” on a rock, clean the fish, cook them, and set them in front of her. She graciously allowed him to sit by her side and enjoy a few overcooked scraps and a couple of sandwiches they had brought in the basket. But she also made him jump up every now and then to do something, finding plenty of reasons to keep him busy. In fact, she had never been more pampered in her life, which was exactly what she wanted. Bob, however, didn’t complain, as the minutes and hours passed without her asking any awkward questions. She didn’t create any tension in that regard, and as long as she didn’t, he didn’t mind helping her over rocks or carrying her things. At least it was a break. His headache wasn't as bad; the fresh air seemed to have helped.
As for her thinking him one of those high-class society-burglars, or social buccaneers, it didn’t so much matter to him, after all. He was getting rather accustomed to the idea. Of course, she would be terribly disappointed if she ever found out he wasn’t one, but there didn’t seem much chance of his ever clearing himself, in her mind, of that unjust suspicion. At least, he reflected moodily, he was capable of making one person in the world not positively miserable. Last night when he had parted from Dickie, he had found a small grain of the same kind of comfort, in the fact the he (or truth) had not harmed Dickie. But to-day Dickie had appeared saddened by Dan’s and Clarence’s troubles. Then, too, Bob had been obliged to walk off, right in front of Dickie’s eyes with the temperamental young thing whom Dickie wanted to marry the worst way. And here he (Bob) was helping her over stones, “toting” frizzling trout for her, and performing a hundred other little services which should, by right, have been Dickie’s pleasure and privilege to perform.
As for her thinking he was one of those elite society burglars or social pirates, it didn’t really bother him that much anymore. He was starting to get used to the idea. Of course, she would be really disappointed if she ever found out he wasn’t one, but it seemed unlikely he would ever clear himself of that unfair suspicion in her eyes. At least, he thought to himself gloomily, he managed to make one person in the world not completely miserable. Last night when he said goodbye to Dickie, he found some comfort in knowing he hadn’t harmed Dickie. But today Dickie looked sad because of Dan’s and Clarence’s problems. Plus, Bob had to walk away right in front of Dickie with the emotional young woman that Dickie wanted to marry more than anything. And here he was helping her over rocks, carrying fresh trout for her, and doing a hundred other little things that should have been Dickie’s joy and privilege to do.
Bob murmured a few idle regrets about Dickie, but Miss Dolly dismissed them—and Dickie—peremptorily. She was sitting now, leaning against a tree and the slave, by command, was lying at her feet.
Bob muttered some casual regrets about Dickie, but Miss Dolly brushed them—and Dickie—aside decisively. She was sitting now, leaning against a tree, and the servant, on command, was lying at her feet.
“Did you know,” she said dreamily, “I am a new woman?”
“Did you know,” she said dreamily, “I’m a new woman?”
He didn’t know it. He never would have dreamed it, and he told her so.
He didn’t know it. He would have never imagined it, and he told her that.
“Yes,” she observed, “I marched in the parade to Washington. That is, I started, went a mile or two, and then got tired. But I marched there, in principle, don’t you see? I think women should throw off their shackles. Don’t you?” Bob might have replied he didn’t know that Miss Dolly ever had had any shackles to throw off, but she didn’t give him time to reply. “I read a book the other day wherein the women do the proposing,” she went on. “It’s on an island and the women are ‘superwomen.’ All women are ‘super’ nowadays.” She regarded him tentatively. Her glance was appraising. “Do you know of any reason why women should not do the proposing, Mr. Bennett?”
“Yes,” she said, “I marched in the parade to Washington. Well, I started, went a mile or two, and then got tired. But I marched there in spirit, you know? I believe women should break free from their constraints. Don’t you?” Bob might have said he didn’t think Miss Dolly ever had any constraints to break free from, but she didn’t give him a chance to respond. “I read a book the other day where the women do the proposing,” she continued. “It’s set on an island, and the women are ‘superwomen.’ All women are ‘super’ these days.” She looked at him curiously, assessing him. “Do you know of any reason why women should not do the proposing, Mr. Bennett?”
“Can’t say that I do,” answered Bob gloomily, feeling as if some one had suddenly laid a cold hand on his breast, right over where the heart is. Her words had caused his thoughts to fly back to another. She might not be proposing to the hammer-thrower at that moment in that “super” fashion, but the chances were that the hammer-thrower was proposing to her. He didn’t look like a chap that would delay matters. He would strike while the iron was hot.
“Can’t say that I do,” Bob replied glumly, feeling like someone had just placed a cold hand on his chest, right over his heart. Her words had sent his thoughts racing back to someone else. She might not be proposing to the hammer-thrower at that moment in that “super” way, but it was likely that the hammer-thrower was proposing to her. He didn’t seem like the kind of guy who would wait around. He would take action while the opportunity was there.
The temperamental young thing eyed Bob and then she eyed a dreamy-looking cloud. She let the fingers of one hand stray idly in Bob’s hair as he lay with his head in the grass.
The moody young girl looked at Bob and then at a dreamy-looking cloud. She let the fingers of one hand wander playfully in Bob’s hair as he lay with his head on the grass.
“It tries hard to curl, doesn’t it?” she remarked irrelevantly.
“It really tries hard to curl, doesn’t it?” she said, off-topic.
“What?” said Bob absently, his mind about two miles and a half away.
“What?” Bob said absentmindedly, his mind about two and a half miles away.
“Your hair. You’ve got lovely hair.” Bob looked disgusted. “It started to curl and then changed its mind, didn’t it?” she giggled.
“Your hair. You’ve got beautiful hair.” Bob looked disgusted. “It began to curl and then changed its mind, right?” she laughed.
Bob muttered disagreeably.
Bob grumbled.
“I suppose you were one of those curly-headed little boys?” went on the temperamental young thing.
“I guess you were one of those curly-haired little boys?” continued the dramatic young woman.
“I don’t know whether I was or not,” he snapped. He was getting back into that snappy mood. Then it struck him this might not be quite the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, for he added sulkily; “Maybe I was.”
“I don’t know if I was or not,” he snapped. He was slipping back into that irritable mood. Then it hit him that this might not be completely accurate, so he added grumpily, “Maybe I was.”
“I can just see you,” said the temperamental young thing in a far-off voice. “Nursie must have thought you a darling.”
“I can totally picture you,” said the moody young person in a distant voice. “Nursie must have thought you were adorable.”
The slave again muttered ominously. He wished the temperamental little thing would take her fingers away. They trailed now idly over an ear.
The slave muttered again, sounding uneasy. He wished that the unpredictable little thing would move her fingers away. They were now lazily tracing along an ear.
“You’re tickling,” said Bob ill-naturedly.
“You’re tickling,” Bob grumbled.
She stopped trailing and patted instead—very gently and carelessly—as if she were patting a big Newfoundland dog which she owned all by herself. That pat expressed a sense of ownership.
She stopped following and patted instead—very gently and casually—like she was patting a big Newfoundland dog that she owned all by herself. That pat showed a sense of ownership.
“I’m wondering,” she said, “whether it would make things nicer, if I did propose and we became engaged?”
“I’m wondering,” she said, “if it would make things better if I proposed and we got engaged?”
“Oh,” said Bob satirically, “you’re wondering that, are you?”
“Oh,” Bob said sarcastically, “you’re actually wondering that, huh?”
“Yes.” More tentative pats.
“Yes.” More careful pats.
“And what do you suppose I’d say?” he demanded. He was feeling more and more grouchy all the time. He didn’t want any of that “superwoman” business. He had already had one proposal. What mockery! A proposal! He heard again that other “Will you marry me?” and looked once more, in fancy, into the starry, enigmatical violet eyes. He experienced anew that surging sensation in his veins. And he awoke again to the hollow jest of those words! He felt, indeed, a moderately vivid duplication of all his emotions of the night before. The temperamental young thing’s voice recalled him from the poignant recollections of the painful past into the dreary and monotonous present.
“And what do you think I’d say?” he asked, sounding more and more irritated. He didn’t want any of that “superwoman” stuff. He had already received one proposal. What a joke! A proposal! He heard that other “Will you marry me?” again and imagined looking into those starry, mysterious violet eyes. He felt that rush in his veins once more. And he was once again confronted with the empty joke of those words! He felt a somewhat strong replay of all his emotions from the night before. The temperamental girl’s voice pulled him away from the painful memories of the past back into the dull and repetitive present.
“Why, you actually blushed, just now,” she said accusingly.
“Wow, you actually blushed just now,” she said accusingly.
“Did I?” growled Bob, looking grudgingly into dark eyes where a moment before, in imagination, there had been starry violet ones.
“Did I?” Bob growled, begrudgingly staring into dark eyes where just a moment ago, in his imagination, there had been starry violet ones.
“Yes, you did. And”—her voice taking a tenderer accent—“it was becoming, too.”
“Yes, you did. And”—her voice softening—“it suited you, too.”
“Rush of blood to the head,” he retorted shortly. “Comes from lying like this.”
“Rush of blood to the head,” he shot back curtly. “That happens when you lie like this.”
“What would you say if I did?” she demanded, reverting to that other topic. “Propose, I mean? Would you accept? Would you take me—I mean, shyly suffer me,” with a giggle, “to take you into my arms?”
“What would you say if I did?” she asked, switching back to that other topic. “Propose, I mean? Would you accept? Would you let me—I mean, shyly put my arms around you?” she giggled.
“Quit joshing!” growled Bob.
“Stop joking!” growled Bob.
“Answer. Would you?”
"Answer. Will you?"
“No.”
“No.”
“No?” Bending over him more closely. For a “super,” she was certainly wonderfully attractive in her slim young way at that moment. Not many of the inferior sex would have acted quite so stonily as Bob acted. He didn’t show any more emotion when she bent over than one of those prostrate stone Pharaohs, or Rameses, which lie around with immovable features on the sands of Egypt. “You see you couldn’t help it,” the super-temperamental young thing assured him, confidentially.
“Not really?” She leaned in closer. For a “super,” she was undeniably stunning in her slim, youthful way at that moment. Not many women would have remained as unyielding as Bob did. He didn't show any more emotion when she leaned over than one of those lifeless stone Pharaohs, or Rameses, that lie around with frozen expressions on the sands of Egypt. “You see, you couldn't help it,” the overly dramatic young woman assured him, in a confidential tone.
“Ouch!” said Bob, for she was tickling again. He wished she would keep those trailing fingers in her lap. They felt like a fly perambulating his brow or walking around his ear.
“Ouch!” said Bob, as she started tickling him again. He wished she would keep those wandering fingers in her lap. They felt like a fly crawling across his forehead or buzzing around his ear.
“You’d just have to accept me,” she added.
“You’d just have to accept me,” she said.
“Oh, you mean on account of that silly burglar business?”
“Oh, you’re talking about that ridiculous burglar thing?”
“Of course. You left two or three thumb-prints in the room.”
“Of course. You left two or three fingerprints in the room.”
“I did?” That was incriminating. No getting around thumb-prints! He felt as if the temperamental little thing was weaving a mesh around him. In addition to being a “super,” she was a Lady of Shalott.
“I did?” That was incriminating. No escaping thumbprints! He felt like the temperamental little thing was trapping him. Besides being a “super,” she was a Lady of Shalott.
Dolly thrilled with a sense of her power. She could play with poor Bob as a cat with a mouse; she could let him go so far and then put out her claws and draw him back.
Dolly was excited by her own power. She could toy with poor Bob like a cat with a mouse; she could let him get so far and then bring out her claws and pull him back.
“Besides, I found out you didn’t quite tell me the truth about those accomplices of yours,” she went on triumphantly. “You said there weren’t any, and when I went out and looked around where the dog barked, I found footprints. They led to the trellis, right up into your room. The trellis, too, showed some person, or persons, had climbed up, for some of the boughs were broken. Deny now, if you can, you had visitors last night,” she challenged him.
“Besides, I found out you didn’t exactly tell me the truth about your accomplices,” she continued triumphantly. “You said there weren’t any, but when I went out and checked where the dog was barking, I found footprints. They led to the trellis, right up to your room. The trellis also showed that someone had climbed up because some of the branches were broken. Go ahead, deny it if you can, that you had visitors last night,” she challenged him.
Bob didn’t deny; he lay there helpless.
Bob didn’t deny it; he lay there unable to move.
“Of course,” she said with another giggle, “I might let you say you’ll think it over. I might not press you too hard at once for an answer. I don’t want you to reply: ‘This is so sudden,’ or anything like that.” She got up suddenly with a little delirious laugh. “But I simply can’t wait. You look so handsome when you’re cross. Besides, it will be so exciting to be engaged to a—a—”
“Of course,” she said with another giggle, “I might let you say you’ll think about it. I might not push you too hard at first for an answer. I don’t want you to say: ‘This is so sudden,’ or something like that.” She suddenly stood up with a little giddy laugh. “But I just can’t wait. You look so good when you’re annoyed. Plus, it’ll be so exciting to be engaged to a—”
“Society-burglar—” grimly.
“Social burglar—” grimly.
“That’s it. I’ve never been engaged to a burglar before!”
"That's it. I've never been engaged to a robber before!"
“But you have been engaged?”
“But you’re engaged?”
“Oh, yes. Lots of times. But not like this. This feels as if it might lead—”
“Oh, yes. Many times. But not like this. This feels like it could lead—”
“To the altar?” Satirically.
"To the altar?" sarcastically.
“Yes.”
"Sure."
“But suppose I got caught?—that is, if I really enjoyed the distinction of being a burglar which I am not?”
“But what if I got caught?—like, if I actually enjoyed the label of being a burglar, which I'm not?”
“Then, of course, I never knew—you deceived me—poor innocent!—as well as the rest of the world. And there would be columns and columns in the papers. And some people would pity me, but most people would envy me. And I’d visit you in jail with a handkerchief to my eyes and be snap-shotted that way. And I’d sit in a dark corner in the court, looking pale and interesting. And the lady reporters would interview me and they’d publish my picture with yours—‘Handsome Bob, the swell society yeggman. Member of one of the oldest families, etc.’ And—and—”
“Then, of course, I never knew—you tricked me—poor innocent!—just like everyone else. And there would be column after column in the papers. Some people would feel sorry for me, but most would envy me. I’d visit you in jail with a handkerchief to my eyes, and they'd snap a photo like that. I’d sit in a dark corner in court, looking pale and intriguing. The lady reporters would interview me, and they’d publish my picture next to yours—‘Handsome Bob, the classy society criminal. Member of one of the oldest families, etc.’ And—and—”
“Great Scott!” cried Bob. She had that publicity-bee worse than Gee-gee. In another moment she’d be setting the day. “Shall we—ah!—retrace our steps?”
“Great Scott!” shouted Bob. She had that attention-grabbing vibe even worse than Gee-gee. In a moment, she’d be deciding the agenda. “Should we—ah!—go back?”
It was getting late. The hours had gone by somehow and as she offered no objections, they “retraced.” For some time now she was silent. Perhaps she was imagining herself too happy for words. Once or twice she cast a sidelong glance shyly at Bob. It was the look of a capricious slave-owner metamorphosed, through the power of love, into a yielding and dependent young maiden. Bob was supposed to be the brutal conqueror. Meanwhile that young man strode along unheedingly. He didn’t mind any little branches or bushes that happened to stand in his way and plowed right through them. It would have been the same, if he had met that historic bramble bush. A thousand scratches, more or less, wouldn’t count.
It was getting late. The hours had passed somehow, and since she didn’t object, they “retraced.” She had been silent for a while now. Maybe she was imagining herself too happy to put into words. Once or twice, she shyly glanced at Bob from the side. It was the look of a whimsical slave owner changed, through the power of love, into a submissive and dependent young woman. Bob was supposed to be the ruthless conqueror. Meanwhile, that young man walked on, unaware. He didn’t care about the small branches or bushes in his way and pushed right through them. It would have been the same if he had come across that famous bramble bush. A thousand scratches, more or less, wouldn’t matter.
“You can put your arm around me now,” she observed, with another musical but detestable giggle, as they passed through a grove, not very far from the house. “It is quite customary here, you know.”
“You can put your arm around me now,” she said with another annoying yet cheerful giggle as they walked through a grove not far from the house. “It’s pretty common here, you know.”
He didn’t know, but he obeyed. What else could he do?
He didn’t know, but he followed the instructions. What else could he do?
“Now say something.” Her voice had once more that ownership accent.
“Now say something.” Her voice had that authoritative tone again.
“What do you want me to say?” None too graciously.
“What do you want me to say?” Not very graciously.
“The usual thing! Those three words that make the world go around.”
“The usual thing! Those three words that keep the world spinning.”
“But I don’t.” Even a worm will turn.
“But I don’t.” Even a worm will fight back.
“You will.” Softly.
"You will." Softly.
“I won’t.”
"No way."
“Oh, yes, you will.” More softly. Then with a sigh: “This is the place. Under this oak, carved all over with hearts and things. Do it.”
“Oh, yes, you will.” More gently. Then with a sigh: “This is the spot. Under this oak, covered in carvings of hearts and other stuff. Go ahead and do it.”
“What?” He looked down on lips red as cherries.
“What?” He looked at lips as red as cherries.
“Are you going to?”
"Are you going?"
“And if I don’t?” he challenged her.
“And what if I don’t?” he challenged her.
“Finger-prints!” she said. “Footmarks!”
“Fingerprints!” she said. “Footprints!”
“Oh, well! Confound it.” And he did—the way a bird pecks at a cherry.
“Oh, well! Damn it.” And he did—the way a bird pecks at a cherry.
She straightened with another giggle. “Our first!” she said.
She sat up with another laugh. “Our first!” she said.
“Hope you’re satisfied,” he remarked grudgingly.
“Hope you’re happy,” he said with a hint of annoyance.
“It will do for a beginning. Oh, dear! some one saw us!” He looked around with a start, his unresponsive arm slipping from about a pliant waist.
“It’s good enough for a start. Oh no! Someone saw us!” He looked around in shock, his arm sliding away from a flexible waist.
“I don’t see any one.”
"I don’t see anyone."
“He’s dodged behind a tree. I think it was Dickie. And—yes, there are one or two other men. They—they seem to be dodging, too.” Bob saw them now. One, he was sure, was the commodore.
“He’s hidden behind a tree. I think it was Dickie. And—yeah, there are a couple of other guys. They—they seem to be hiding too.” Bob saw them now. One, he was sure, was the commodore.
“Funny performance, isn’t it?” he said, with a sickly smile.
“Funny performance, right?” he said, with a twisted smile.
“Perhaps—?” She looked at him with genuine awe in the temperamental eyes. He read her thought; she thought—believed they had “come for him.” She appeared positively startled, and—yes, sedulous! Maybe, she was discovering in herself a little bit of that “really, truly” feeling.
“Maybe—?” She looked at him with genuine awe in her expressive eyes. He understood her thought; she believed they had “come for him.” She seemed genuinely surprised and—yes, eager! Maybe she was finding a little bit of that “really, truly” feeling within herself.
“Oh!” she said. “They mustn’t—”
“Oh!” she said. “They shouldn’t—”
“Don’t you worry,” he reassured her. “I think I can safely promise you they won’t do what you expect them to.”
“Don’t worry,” he reassured her. “I can pretty confidently promise you they won’t do what you’re expecting.”
“You mean,” joyously, “you have a way to circumvent them?” She was sure now he had; the aristocratic burglars always have. He would probably have a long and varied career before him yet.
“You mean,” she said joyfully, “you have a way to get around them?” She was now convinced he did; the high-class thieves always do. He probably had a long and varied career ahead of him still.
“I mean just what I say. But I think they want to talk with me? Indeed, I’m quite sure they do. They are coming up now. Perhaps you’d better leave me to deal with them.”
“I mean exactly what I say. But I think they want to talk to me? In fact, I’m pretty sure they do. They’re coming up now. Maybe you should let me handle this.”
“You—you are sure they have no evidence to—?”
“You—you’re sure they don’t have any evidence to—?”
“Land me in jail? Positively. I assure you, on my honor, you are the only living person who, by any stretch of the imagination, could offer damaging testimony against me, along that line.”
“Put me in jail? Absolutely. I promise you, on my word, you’re the only person alive who could possibly give any damaging testimony against me in that regard.”
He spoke so confidently she felt it was the truth. “I believe you,” she said. She wanted to say more, befitting the thrill of the moment, but she had no time. Dickie and two others were approaching. It might be best if he met them alone. So she slipped away and walked toward the house. It would be quite exciting enough afterward, she told herself, to find out what happened. It wasn’t until she got almost to the house, that she remembered she ought to have asked Bob for a ring. Of course, he would have a goodly supply of them. Would it make her particeps criminis though, if she wore one of his rings? Then she concluded it wouldn’t, because she was innocent of intention. She didn’t know. She wondered, also, if she should announce her “engagement” right off, or wait a day or two. She decided to wait a day or two. But she told Miss Gwendoline Gerald what a lovely time she and Mr. Bennett had had together, fishing. And Miss Gerald smiled a cryptic smile.
He spoke so confidently that she felt it was true. “I believe you,” she said. She wanted to say more, fitting the thrill of the moment, but she didn't have time. Dickie and two others were coming over. It might be best if he met them alone. So she slipped away and walked toward the house. It would be exciting enough later, she told herself, to find out what happened. It wasn’t until she got almost to the house that she remembered she should have asked Bob for a ring. Of course, he would have plenty of them. But would it make her particeps criminis if she wore one of his rings? Then she concluded it wouldn’t, since she had no intention of doing anything wrong. She didn’t know. She also wondered if she should announce her “engagement” right away or wait a day or two. She decided to wait a day or two. But she told Miss Gwendoline Gerald what a lovely time she and Mr. Bennett had had together fishing. And Miss Gerald smiled a cryptic smile.
Meanwhile Bob had met Dan and Dickie and Clarence.
Meanwhile, Bob had met Dan, Dickie, and Clarence.
CHAPTER XII—JUST ONE THING AFTER ANOTHER
It was far from a pleasant meeting. Dickie looked about as amiable as a wind or thunder demon, in front of a Japanese temple. That oscillatory performance beneath the “kissing-oak,” as the noble tree was called, had been almost too much for Dickie. He seemed to have trouble in articulating.
It was definitely not a pleasant meeting. Dickie looked about as friendly as a wind or thunder demon in front of a Japanese temple. That back-and-forth performance under the “kissing-oak,” as the impressive tree was called, had nearly overwhelmed Dickie. He seemed to be struggling to express himself.
“You’re a nice one, aren’t you?” he managed at length to say, and his tones were like the splutter of a defective motor. “You ought to be given a leather medal.”
“You’re a real sweetheart, aren’t you?” he finally managed to say, and his voice sounded like a sputtering engine. “You deserve a leather medal.”
“Could I help it?” said Bob wearily. And then because he was too much of a gentleman to vouchsafe information incriminating a lady: “Usual place! Customary thing! Blame it on the oak! Ha! ha!” This wasn’t evading the truth; it was simply facetiousness. Might as well meet this trio of dodging brigands with a smiling face! Dickie’s vocal motor failed to explode, even spasmodically; that reply seemed to have extinguished him. But the commodore awoke to vivacity.
“Could I help it?” Bob said tiredly. And then because he was too much of a gentleman to share any information that might incriminate a lady, he added, “Usual place! Same old thing! Blame it on the oak! Ha! ha!” This wasn’t brushing off the truth; it was just being humorous. Might as well face this group of sneaky troublemakers with a smile! Dickie’s voice didn’t even make a sound, not even for a moment; that reply seemed to have shut him down completely. But the commodore perked up with energy.
“Let us try to meet this situation calmly,” he said, red as a turkey-cock. “But let us walk as we talk,” taking Bob’s arm and leading that young man unresistingly down a path to the driveway to the village. “I shouldn’t by any chance want to encounter Mrs. Dan just yet,” he explained. “So if you don’t mind, we’ll get away from here, while I explain.”
“Let’s try to handle this situation calmly,” he said, his face bright red. “But let’s walk while we talk,” he said, taking Bob’s arm and guiding the young man down a path toward the driveway to the village. “I really wouldn’t want to run into Mrs. Dan just now,” he added. “So if you don’t mind, let’s get out of here while I explain.”
Bob didn’t mind. He saw no guile in the commodore’s manner or words. Nor did he observe how Clarence looked at Dickie. The twilight shadows were beginning to fall.
Bob didn’t mind. He saw no deception in the commodore’s manner or words. Nor did he notice how Clarence looked at Dickie. The twilight shadows were starting to fall.
“Briefly,” went on the commodore, as he steered them out of the woods, “our worst fears have been realized. Negotiations with Gee-gee are in progress. Divorce papers will probably follow.” Clarence on the other side of Dickie made a sound. “All this is your work.” The commodore seemed about to become savage, but he restrained himself. “No use speaking about that. Also, it is too late for us to call the wager off and pay up. Mischief’s done now.”
“Briefly,” the commodore continued as he led them out of the woods, “our worst fears have come true. Talks with Gee-gee are underway. Divorce papers will likely be next.” Clarence, sitting across from Dickie, made a noise. “This is all your doing.” The commodore looked like he was going to lose his temper, but he held back. “There's no point in bringing that up. Plus, it’s too late for us to back out of the bet and settle up. The damage is done now.”
“Why not make a clean breast of everything?” suggested Bob. “Say it was a wager, and—”
“Why not just come clean about everything?” suggested Bob. “Say it was a bet, and—”
“A truth-telling stunt? That would help a lot.” Contemptuously.
“A truth-telling stunt? That would be really helpful.” Contemptuously.
Dickie muttered: “Bonehead!”
Dickie muttered, “Dumbass!”
“I mean, you can say there wasn’t any harm,” said Bob desperately. “That it was all open and innocent!”
“I mean, you can say there wasn’t any harm,” Bob said desperately. “That it was all open and innocent!”
“Much good my saying that would do!” snorted Dan. “You don’t know Mrs. Dan.”
“Yeah, right, like that would help!” scoffed Dan. “You don’t know Mrs. Dan.”
“Or Mrs. Clarence,” said Clarence weakly.
“Or Mrs. Clarence,” Clarence said weakly.
Bob hung his head.
Bob looked down.
“We’ve thought of one little expedient that may help,” observed Dan, still speaking with difficulty. “While such influences as we could summon are at work on the New York end, we’ve got to square matters here. We’ve got to account for your—your—” here the commodore nearly choked—“extraordinary revelations.”
“We’ve come up with a small plan that might help,” Dan said, still struggling to speak. “While we’re working on the New York side, we need to resolve things here. We have to explain your—your—” here the commodore nearly choked—“extraordinary revelations.”
“But how,” said Bob patiently, “can you ‘account’ for them? I suppose you mean to make me out a liar?”
“But how,” Bob said patiently, “can you ‘explain’ them? Are you trying to call me a liar?”
“Exactly,” from the commodore coolly.
"Exactly," said the commodore coolly.
“I don’t mind,” returned Bob wearily, “as long as it will help you out and I’m not one. Only I can’t say those things aren’t true.”
“I don’t mind,” Bob replied tiredly, “as long as it helps you and I’m not one. It’s just that I can’t say those things aren’t true.”
“You don’t have to,” said Dan succinctly. “There’s an easier way than that. No one would believe you, anyway, now.”
“You don’t have to,” Dan said briefly. “There’s an easier way than that. No one would believe you, anyway, now.”
“That’s true.” Gloomily.
“That's true.” Sullenly.
“All we need,” went on Dan, brightening a bit, “is your cooperation.”
"All we need," Dan continued, looking a bit more positive, "is your cooperation."
“What can I do?”
"What am I able to do?"
“You don’t do anything. We do what is to be done. You just come along.”
“You don’t do anything. We handle what needs to be done. You just tag along.”
“We take you into custody,” interposed Clarence.
“We're taking you into custody,” interrupted Clarence.
“Lock you up!” exploded Dickie once more. “And a good job.”
“Lock you up!” Dickie shouted again. “And it would be a good thing.”
“Lock me up?” Bob gazed at them, bewildered. Had the temperamental little thing “peached,” after all? Impossible! And yet if she hadn’t, how could Dan and Dickie and Clarence know he was a burglar—or rather, that a combination of unlucky circumstances made him seem one? Perhaps that kiss was a signal for them to step forward and take him. History was full of such kisses. And yet he would have sworn she was not that kind.
“Lock me up?” Bob stared at them, confused. Had the feisty little thing really “snitched” after all? No way! But if she hadn’t, how could Dan, Dickie, and Clarence know he was a burglar—or more accurately, that a series of unfortunate events made him look like one? Maybe that kiss was a signal for them to come forward and grab him. History is full of kisses like that. Yet, he could have sworn she wasn't that type.
“You’re to come along without making a fuss,” said the commodore significantly.
“You're going to come along without causing a scene,” said the commodore meaningfully.
“But I don’t want to come along. This is going too far,” remonstrated Bob. “I’ve a decided objection to being locked up as a burglar.”
“But I don’t want to go with you. This is going too far,” Bob protested. “I really object to being locked up as a burglar.”
“Burglar!” exclaimed Dan.
“Burglar!” shouted Dan.
“Don’t know how you found out! Appearances may be against me, but,” stopping in the road, “if you want me to go along, you’ve got to make me.”
“Don’t know how you found out! It may look bad for me, but,” pausing in the road, “if you want me to go along, you’ve got to convince me.”
The trio looked at one another. “Maybe, he really is—” suggested Dickie, touching his forehead.
The three of them glanced at each other. “Maybe he really is—” suggested Dickie, tapping his forehead.
“Too much truth!” said Clarence with a sneer. “Feel half that way, myself!”
“Way too much truth!” Clarence said with a sneer. “I feel a bit the same way!”
“Would be all the better for us, if it were really so,” observed Dan. And to Bob: “You think that we think you’re a burglar?”
“Would be all the better for us if it really were,” Dan noted. And to Bob: “Do you think we think you’re a burglar?”
“Don’t you? Didn’t you say something about locking me up?”
“Don’t you? Didn’t you mention something about locking me up?”
“But not in a jail.”
“But not in prison.”
Bob stared. “What then?”
Bob stared. "What's next?"
“A sanatorium.”
“A wellness center.”
“Sanatorium?”
"Sanitarium?"
“For the insane.”
"For the crazy."
“You mean—?”
"Are you saying—?"
“You’re crazy,” said Dan. “That’s the ticket. Dickie found out, up at Mrs. Ralston’s.”
“You’re insane,” said Dan. “That’s the ticket. Dickie found out, up at Mrs. Ralston’s.”
“Oh, Dickie did?” said Bob, looking at that young gentleman with lowering brows.
“Oh, Dickie did?” Bob said, glancing at the young man with a frown.
“You bet I did,” returned Dickie. “I put in a good day,” viciously, “while you were fishing.”
“You bet I did,” said Dickie. “I worked hard all day,” he said angrily, “while you were out fishing.”
“Yes,” corroborated the commodore, “Dickie found a dozen people who think you’re dottie on the crumpet, all right.”
“Yes,” confirmed the commodore, “Dickie found a dozen people who think you’re a bit crazy, that’s for sure.”
Bob folded his arms, still regarding Dickie. “You know what I’ve a mind to do to you?”
Bob crossed his arms, still watching Dickie. “Do you know what I’m thinking of doing to you?”
“Hold on!” said Dan hastily. “This matter’s got to be handled tactfully. We can’t, any one of us, give way to our personal feelings, however much we may want to. Let’s be businesslike. Eh, Clarence? Businesslike.”
“Hold on!” Dan said quickly. “We need to handle this carefully. None of us can let our personal feelings get in the way, no matter how much we might want to. Let’s keep it professional. Right, Clarence? Professional.”
“Sure,” said Clarence faintly.
“Sure,” said Clarence quietly.
But Dickie, standing behind the commodore and Clarence, said something about tact being a waste of time in some cases. He said it in such a sneering nasty way that Bob breathed deep.
But Dickie, standing behind the commodore and Clarence, remarked that being tactful is sometimes a waste of time. He said it in such a sneering, nasty way that Bob took a deep breath.
“I’ve simply got to spank that little rooster,” he muttered.
“I just have to spank that little rooster,” he muttered.
But again the commodore smoothed things over. “Shut up, Dickie,” he said angrily. “You’ll spoil all. I’m sure Bob wants to help us out, if he can. He knows it’s really up to him, to do so. Bob’s a good sport.” It was an awful effort for the commodore to appear nice and amiable, but he managed to, for the moment. “You will help us out, won’t you?” he added, placing velvety fingers on Bob’s arm.
But once more the commodore calmed the situation. “Be quiet, Dickie,” he said angrily. “You’ll ruin everything. I’m sure Bob wants to help us out if he can. He knows it’s really up to him to do that. Bob’s a good sport.” It was a huge effort for the commodore to seem friendly and pleasant, but he managed it for the moment. “You will help us out, won’t you?” he added, placing his soft fingers on Bob’s arm.
But Bob with a vigorous swing shook off those fingers. He didn’t intend being taken into custody. Dan and the others might as well understand that, first as last. The commodore’s voice grew more appealing.
But Bob swung his arm forcefully and shook off those fingers. He wasn't planning on being arrested. Dan and the others might as well get that through their heads, once and for all. The commodore's voice became more pleading.
“Don’t you see you’re being crazy will account for everything?”
“Don’t you see you’re acting crazy will explain everything?”
“Oh, will it?” In a still small voice.
“Oh, will it?” in a quiet voice.
“Miss Gwendoline asked me if you’d showed signs before coming down here?” piped up Dickie. And again Bob breathed deep. Then his thoughts floated away. Dickie was too insignificant to bother with.
"Miss Gwendoline asked me if you had shown any signs before coming down here?" Dickie chimed in. Bob took a deep breath again. Then his thoughts drifted off. Dickie was too unimportant to pay attention to.
“Hallucinations!” observed the commodore briskly. “Fits you to a T!”
“Hallucinations!” the commodore remarked quickly. “That suits you perfectly!”
Bob didn’t answer. He was trying to think if she—Miss Gwendoline—hadn’t said something about hallucinations?
Bob didn’t answer. He was trying to think if she—Miss Gwendoline—had mentioned something about hallucinations?
“You simply imagined all those things you confided to Mrs. Dan. You didn’t mean to tell what wasn’t so, but you couldn’t help yourself. You really believed it all, at the time. You are irresponsible.”
“You just made up all those things you told Mrs. Dan. You didn’t intend to say what wasn’t true, but you couldn’t stop yourself. You really believed it all back then. You are careless.”
“Maybe you’ll tell me next there isn’t any Gee-gee,” said Bob. “Also, that Miss Gid-up is but an empty coinage of the brain?”
“Maybe you’ll tell me next that there isn’t any Gee-gee,” said Bob. “Also, that Miss Gid-up is just a figment of the imagination?”
“No, we’ll do better than that. The existence of a Gee-gee accounts, in part, for your condition. First stage, Gee-gee on the brain; then, brain-storm! Gee-gee is part of your obsession!”
“No, we’ll do better than that. The existence of a Gee-gee explains, in part, your condition. First stage, Gee-gee on the brain; then, brain-storm! Gee-gee is part of your obsession!”
“You talk, think and dream of Gee-gee,” interposed Clarence. “We’ve got it all doped out. You are madly jealous. You imagine every man is in love with her. You even attribute to Dan here, ulterior motives.”
“You talk, think, and dream about Gee-gee,” interrupted Clarence. “We’ve figured it all out. You’re totally jealous. You think every guy is in love with her. You even suspect Dan here of having hidden motives.”
“I mentioned to Miss Gerald, privately, that a certain very fascinating but nameless young show-girl might be your trouble,” said Dickie.
“I told Miss Gerald, in private, that a certain really intriguing but unnamed young showgirl might be your issue,” said Dickie.
Again Bob did a few deep-breathing exercises, and again he managed to conquer himself.
Again, Bob did a few deep-breathing exercises, and again he managed to get himself under control.
“Don’t you see we’ve simply got to lock you up?” said the commodore. “You’re a menace to the community; you’re a happy home-breaker. You may do something desperate.”
“Don’t you see we have to lock you up?” said the commodore. “You’re a threat to the community; you’re a cheerful home-wrecker. You might do something reckless.”
“I might,” said Bob, looking the commodore in the eye.
"I might," Bob said, looking the commodore in the eye.
Dan overlooked any covert meaning. “We take your case in time,” he went on. “You go into an institution, stay a week, or two—or shall we say, three,” insinuatingly, “and you come out cured.”
Dan ignored any hidden meaning. “We’ll handle your case in due time,” he continued. “You’ll check into a facility, stay for a week, or two—or let’s say, three,” he suggested slyly, “and you’ll come out healed.”
“Wouldn’t that be nice?” said Bob. They were going to put truth in a crazy-house. That’s what it amounted to. “But how about Gid-up? Did I have an obsession about her, too?”
“Wouldn’t that be nice?” Bob said. They were going to put truth in a mental institution. That’s what it came down to. “But what about Gid-up? Did I have an obsession about her, too?”
“Oh, as Gee-gee’s chum she is part of the brainstorm and that drags poor old Clarence in,—Clarence who is as ignorant of the existence of Gid-up as I am of Gee-gee.”
“Oh, as Gee-gee’s friend, she’s part of the idea pool and that pulls poor old Clarence in—Clarence who knows as much about Gid-up as I do about Gee-gee.”
“And that’s the truth,” said Clarence stoutly.
“And that’s the truth,” said Clarence firmly.
Bob laughed. He couldn’t help it. Perhaps many of the people in jails and crazy-houses were only poor misguided mortals who had gone wrong looking for truth. Maybe some of them had met with that other kind of truth (Dan’s kind and Clarence’s kind) and they hadn’t the proper vision to see it was the truth (that is, the world’s truth).
Bob laughed. He couldn't help it. Maybe a lot of the people in jails and mental hospitals were just unfortunate souls who got lost in their search for truth. Perhaps some of them had encountered that other kind of truth (Dan's kind and Clarence's kind) and they just didn't have the right perspective to recognize it as the truth (meaning, the world's truth).
“Got it fixed all right,” went on the commodore. “Doc, up there at the house, has written a letter to the head of an eminently respectable institution, for eminently respectable private patients. It’s not far away and the head is a friend of Doc’s. Dickie saw to the details. It’s a good place. Kind gentle attendants; nourishing food. Isn’t that what the Doc said, Dickie?”
“Got it fixed up just fine,” continued the commodore. “Doc, over at the house, has written a letter to the head of a very reputable institution for private patients. It’s not too far and the head of the place is a friend of Doc’s. Dickie took care of the details. It’s a good place. Kind, gentle staff; nourishing food. Isn’t that what the Doc said, Dickie?”
“I guess the food won’t hurt him” said Dickie, regarding Bob. Maybe, Dickie wouldn’t have minded if Bob had had an attack, or two, of indigestion.
“I guess the food won’t hurt him,” said Dickie, talking about Bob. Maybe Dickie wouldn’t have cared if Bob had a bout or two of indigestion.
“Doc says they’re especially humane to the violent,” continued the commodore, unmindful of Bob’s ominous silence. It seemed as if Dan was talking to gain time, for he looked around where the bushes cast dark shadows, as if to locate some spot. “None of that slugging or straight-jacket business! Doc talked it over with the judge and some of the others. Judge said he’d committed a lot of people who hadn’t acted half as crazy as you have. You see Dickie had to take him into his confidence a little bit and the Doc, too. Doc diagnosed your breakdown as caused by drugs and alcohol.”
“Doc says they’re especially kind to the violent,” continued the commodore, not noticing Bob’s heavy silence. It seemed like Dan was talking to fill the silence, as he looked around where the bushes created dark shadows, trying to find a way out. “None of that beating or straitjacket stuff! Doc talked it over with the judge and some others. The judge said he’d sent a lot of people away who hadn’t acted nearly as crazy as you have. You see, Dickie had to share some things with him and with Doc, too. Doc figured your breakdown was caused by drugs and alcohol.”
“So you made me out a dipsomaniac?” observed Bob.
“So you think I’m an alcoholic?” Bob remarked.
“What else was there to do? Didn’t you bring it on yourself?”
“What else could you do? Didn’t you bring this on yourself?”
Dan now stopped, not far from a clump of bushes. Down the road stood a stalled motor-car vaguely distinguishable in the dusk. Its occupant, or occupants had apparently gone to telephone for help.
Dan now stopped, not far from a bunch of bushes. Down the road was a broken-down car barely visible in the dim light. Its driver, or passengers, had likely gone to call for help.
“You bet I made you out a ‘dippy,’” said Dickie with much satisfaction.
“You bet I thought you were a ‘dippy,’” said Dickie with great satisfaction.
A white light shone from Bob’s eyes. Then he shrugged his broad shoulders.
A bright light shone from Bob’s eyes. Then he shrugged his broad shoulders.
“Good night,” he said curtly and turned to go.
“Good night,” he said sharply and turned to leave.
But at that instant the commodore emitted a low whistle and two men sprang out of the bushes. At the same moment the trio precipitated themselves, also, on Bob. It was a large load. He “landed” one or two on somebody and got one or two in return himself. Dickie rather forgot himself in the excitement of the moment and was unnecessarily forceful, considering the odds. But Bob was big and husky and for a little while he kept them all busy. His football training came in handy. Numbers, however, finally prevailed, and though he heaved and struggled, he had to go down. Then they sat on him, distributing themselves variously over his anatomy.
But just then, the commodore let out a low whistle, and two guys jumped out of the bushes. At the same time, the trio also lunged at Bob. It was a heavy situation. He took down one or two of them and received a couple of hits in return. Dickie got a bit carried away in the excitement and was a little too aggressive, given the odds. But Bob was big and strong, and for a little while, he kept them all occupied. His football training came in handy. However, numbers eventually won out, and even though he pushed and fought, he had to go down. Then they sat on him, spreading themselves out over him in various ways.
“Thought I was giving you that charming little chat, just for the pleasure of your company, did you?” panted the commodore, from somewhere about the upper part of Bob? “Why, I was just leading you here.”
“Did you think I was having that charming little conversation just for the pleasure of your company?” panted the commodore, from somewhere around the upper part of Bob? “I was actually just guiding you here.”
“And he came like a lamb!” said Clarence, holding an arm.
“And he came like a lamb!” said Clarence, holding an arm.
“Or a big boob!” from Dickie, who had charge of a leg.
“Or a big boob!” shouted Dickie, who was in charge of a leg.
Bob gave a kick and it caught Dickie. The little man went bowling down the road like a ten-pin. But after that, there wasn’t much kick left in Bob. They tied him tight and bore him (or truth, trussed like a fowl), to the car. Some of them got in to keep him company. There wasn’t anything the matter with the car. It could speed up to about sixty, or seventy, at a pinch. It went “like sixty” now.
Bob kicked, and it hit Dickie. The little guy went tumbling down the road like a bowling pin. But after that, Bob wasn't feeling very energetic anymore. They tied him up tightly and carried him (to be honest, like a chicken) to the car. Some of them got in to keep him company. The car was in good shape. It could go up to about sixty or seventy if needed. It was moving “like crazy” now.
“If he tries to raise a hullabaloo, toot your horn,” said the commodore, when he got his breath, to the driver. “At the same time I’ll wave my hat and act like a cut-up. Then they’ll only take us for a party of fuzzled joy-riders.”
“If he tries to make a scene, honk your horn,” said the commodore, catching his breath. “At the same time, I’ll wave my hat and act like a clown. Then they’ll just think we’re a bunch of confused joyriders.”
“I don’t think he’ll make much noise now,” shouted Dickie significantly, from behind. “We’ll jolly well see to that.”
“I don’t think he’ll make much noise now,” shouted Dickie with emphasis from behind. “We’ll definitely take care of that.”
“How long will it take you to make the bug-house?” the commodore asked the man at the wheel.
“How long will it take you to build the bug-house?” the commodore asked the guy at the wheel.
“We should reach the private sanatorium in less than an hour,” answered that individual.
“We should get to the private hospital in under an hour,” that person replied.
CHAPTER XIII—AN ENFORCED REST CURE
They kept him two days in the padded room on Dickie’s recommendation, who made Bob out as highly dangerous. “Powerful and vicious,” he described him to the suave individual in charge of the “sanatorium.” That particular apartment was somewhat remote from the other rooms, so that any noises made by the inmate of the former wouldn’t disturb the others. Becoming more reconciled to the inevitable, Bob found the quiet of the padded room rather soothing to his shaken nerves. He didn’t have to talk to hardly a soul. Only an attendant came around once in a while to shove cautiously something edible at him, but the attendant didn’t ask any questions and Bob didn’t have to tell him any truths. It was a joyful relief not to have to tell truths.
They kept him in the padded room for two days on Dickie's advice, who painted Bob as very dangerous. “Powerful and vicious,” he described him to the smooth-talking guy in charge of the “sanatorium.” That room was a bit isolated from the others, ensuring that any sounds from the guy inside wouldn't bother anyone else. As he started to accept his situation, Bob found the silence in the padded room kind of calming for his rattled nerves. He didn't have to talk to hardly anyone. Only one staff member would come by occasionally to carefully offer him some food, but the staff member didn't ask any questions, and Bob didn't have to share any truths. It was such a relief not to have to share truths.
Bob’s eye was swollen and he had a few bruises, but they didn’t count. He had observed with satisfaction that Dickie’s lip had an abrasion and that one of his front teeth seemed missing. Dickie would have to wait until nature and art had repaired his appearance before he could once more a-wooing go. Bob didn’t want the temperamental young thing himself, but he couldn’t conscientiously wish Dickie success in that quarter, after the unnecessarily rough and unsportsmanlike manner in which Dickie had comported himself against him (Bob).
Bob’s eye was swollen and he had a few bruises, but they didn’t matter. He had noticed with satisfaction that Dickie had a cut on his lip and one of his front teeth looked like it was missing. Dickie would have to wait for nature and some work to fix his looks before he could start dating again. Bob didn’t want the moody guy for himself, but he couldn’t honestly wish Dickie good luck in that area after the way Dickie had treated him so roughly and unsportsmanlike.
At first, it had occurred to Bob to take the attendant—and through him, the manager of the institution—into his confidence, but for two reasons he changed his mind about doing so. The attendant would probably receive Bob’s confidence as so many illusions; he would smile and say “Yes—quite so!” or “There! there!”—meaning Bob would get over said illusions some day, and that was why he was there. He was being treated for them. Again, if he unbosomed himself fully, as to the fundamental cause of all this trouble and turmoil, he would lose to the commodore, et al., and have to pay that note which he didn’t very well see how he could pay.
At first, Bob thought about confiding in the attendant—and through him, the manager of the facility—but he changed his mind for two reasons. The attendant would likely see Bob’s trust as just fantasies; he would smile and say, “Yes—exactly!” or “There! There!”—implying that Bob would get over those fantasies eventually, which was why he was there in the first place. He was getting help for them. Moreover, if he completely opened up about the real cause of all this chaos and struggle, he would end up losing to the commodore and others, and he'd have to pay that bill, which he didn’t really know how he could manage.
Bob gritted his teeth. Would it not be better to win now to spite them and in spite of everything? About the worst that could happen, had happened. Why not accept, then, this enforced sojourn philosophically and when the time came, he would walk up to the captain’s (or commodore’s) office and demand a little pay-envelope as his hard-earned wage? There would be a slight balm in that pay-envelope. With the contents thereof, he could relieve some of dad’s necessities which soon would be pressing. Why not, with a little stretch of the imagination, tell himself he (Bob) was only taking a rest cure? People paid big prices for a fashionable rest cure. They probably charged pretty stiff prices here, but it wouldn’t cost him a cent. His dear friends who put him here would have to pay. He wasn’t a voluntary boarder. They would have to vouch for him and his bills. So Bob made up his mind to have as good a time as he could; in other words, to grin and bear it, as best he might.
Bob clenched his teeth. Wouldn’t it be better to win now to show them and despite everything? The worst that could happen had already happened. So why not accept this forced break with a positive attitude and, when the time came, walk up to the captain’s (or commodore’s) office and ask for a paycheck as his hard-earned salary? There would be a small comfort in that paycheck. With it, he could help his dad with some upcoming necessities. Why not, with a little imagination, convince himself that he (Bob) was just taking a wellness retreat? People paid a lot of money for a trendy wellness retreat. They probably charged high fees here, but it wouldn’t cost him anything. His dear friends who put him here would have to pay. He wasn’t a willing guest. They would have to cover him and his expenses. So, Bob decided to make the best of it; in other words, to grin and bear it, as best as he could.
It was a novel experience. Maybe he might write an article about it for one of the Sunday newspapers some day—“How It Feels for a Sane Person to be Forcibly Detained in an Insane Asylum, by One who Has Been There.” The editor could put all manner of gay and giddy head-lines over such an experience. Bob tried to chronicle his feelings in the padded cell, but he couldn’t conjure up anything awful or harrowing. There weren’t spiders, or rats, or any crawly things to lend picturesqueness to the situation. It was only deadly quiet—the kind of quiet he needed.
It was a new experience. Maybe one day he would write an article about it for one of the Sunday newspapers—“What It's Like for a Sane Person to Be Forced into an Insane Asylum, by Someone Who's Been There.” The editor could use all sorts of upbeat and lively headlines for such a story. Bob tried to jot down his feelings in the padded cell, but he couldn’t come up with anything terrible or traumatic. There were no spiders, or rats, or any creepy things to make the situation more dramatic. It was just completely quiet—the kind of quiet he needed.
He slept most of those first two days, making up for hours of lost sleep. His swollen eye became less painful and his appetite grew large and normal. He had to eat with his fingers because they were afraid to trust him with a knife and fork, but he told himself cheerfully that high-class Arabs still ate that way, and that all he had to do was to sit cross-legged, to be strictly comme il faut—that is, from the Arab’s standpoint. Since he had adopted truth as his mentor, Bob had learned, however, that “what should be” or “what shouldn’t,” or “mustn’t,” depends a great deal upon the standpoint, and he was beginning to be very suspicious, or critical, about the standpoint.
He spent most of the first two days sleeping, trying to catch up on lost hours of rest. His swollen eye became less painful, and his appetite returned to normal. He had to eat with his fingers because they were hesitant to let him use a knife and fork, but he told himself cheerfully that fancy Arabs still ate that way, and all he needed to do was sit cross-legged to be properly comme il faut—at least from the Arab’s perspective. Since he had chosen truth as his guide, Bob had learned that “what should be” or “what shouldn’t,” or “mustn’t,” greatly depends on perspective, and he was starting to feel very skeptical, or critical, about the perspective itself.
The third day the doctor in charge thought he could trust him in a room without pads. Bob had a good color, his eye was clear and his appearance generally reassuring, so they gave him now the cutest little cubby-hole, with a cunning little bed and a dear little window, with flowers outside and iron bars between the inmate and the flowers. The managing-medico proudly called Bob’s attention to the flowers and the view. One gazing out could see miles and miles of beautiful country. The managing-med. talked so much about that view that Bob chimed in and said it was lovely, too, only, it reminded him of the bone set just beyond reach of a dog chained to his cute little cubby-hole; or the jug of water and choice viands the Bedouins of the desert set before their victim after they have buried him to the neck in the sand. Bob was going on, trying to think of other felicitous comparisons, when he caught a look in the managing-med’s. eye that stopped him.
On the third day, the doctor in charge thought he could leave him in a room without any restraints. Bob looked good; his skin tone was healthy, his eyes were clear, and he seemed generally reassuring, so they gave him a cozy little room, with a cute bed and a sweet little window, with flowers outside and iron bars separating him from them. The head doctor proudly pointed out the flowers and the view to Bob. Looking out, you could see miles of beautiful countryside. The head doctor talked so much about that view that Bob chimed in, saying it was lovely too, but it made him think of the bone just out of reach of a dog chained to his cute little room; or the jug of water and choice food that desert Bedouins put in front of their victim after they've buried him up to his neck in the sand. Bob was trying to think of other fitting comparisons when he caught a look in the head doctor’s eye that made him stop.
“I wonder if you are well enough, after all, to appreciate this cozy and home-like little apartment?” said the med. musingly.
“I wonder if you're feeling well enough to appreciate this cozy, homey little apartment?” said the med, thoughtfully.
Bob hastily apologized for the figures of speech. The padded place was very restful, no doubt, but he was quite rested now. Any more padded-room kind of rest would be too much. He looked at the view and expatiated upon it, even calling attention to certain charming details of the landscape. The flowers made a charming touch of color and they were just the kind of flowers he liked—good, old-fashioned geraniums! He could say all this and still tell the truth. The medico studied him attentively; then he concluded he would risk it and permit Bob to stay in the room.
Bob quickly apologized for the figurative language. The cushioned space was definitely relaxing, but he felt refreshed already. Any more of that kind of rest would be excessive. He looked at the view and enthusiastically talked about it, even highlighting some lovely details of the scenery. The flowers added a delightful splash of color, and they were exactly the type he liked—good, classic geraniums! He could share all of this and still be honest. The doctor observed him closely; then he decided to take a chance and let Bob remain in the room.
But he didn’t stay there long. Several nights later a pebble clicked against his window; at first, he did not notice. The sound was repeated. Then Bob got up, went to his window, raised it noiselessly and looked out. In the shadow, beneath the window, stood a figure.
But he didn’t stay there long. A few nights later, a pebble tapped against his window; at first, he didn’t notice. The sound happened again. Then Bob got up, went to his window, quietly raised it, and looked out. In the shadow beneath the window stood a figure.
“Catch,” whispered a voice and instinctively Bob put out his hand. But he didn’t catch; he missed. Again and again some one below tossed something until finally he did catch. He looked at the object—a spool of thread. Now what on earth did he want with a spool of thread? Did the person below think some of his garments needed mending? It was strong, serviceable enough thread.
“Catch,” whispered a voice, and instinctively Bob reached out his hand. But he missed. Again and again, someone below tossed something until he finally caught it. He looked at the object—a spool of thread. What on earth did he want with a spool of thread? Did the person below think some of his clothes needed mending? It was strong, useful thread.
For some moments Bob cogitated, then going to the bureau, he picked up a tooth-brush, tied it to the thread, and let it down. After an interval he pulled up the thread; the tooth-brush had disappeared and a file was there in its stead. Then Bob tied to the thread something else and instead of it, he got back the end of an excellent manila rope. After that he went to work. It took Bob about an hour to get those bars out; it took him, then, about a minute to get out himself. Fortunately some one in a near-by room was having a tantrum and the little rasping sound of the filing couldn’t be heard. The louder the person yelled, the harder Bob filed.
For a while, Bob thought it over, then went to the dresser, grabbed a toothbrush, tied it to a thread, and lowered it down. After a moment, he pulled the thread back up; the toothbrush was gone, and in its place was a file. Then Bob tied something else to the thread and instead he retrieved the end of a strong manila rope. After that, he got to work. It took Bob about an hour to remove those bars; then it only took him about a minute to get out himself. Luckily, someone in a nearby room was throwing a fit, so the faint sound of the filing couldn’t be heard. The louder the person screamed, the harder Bob filed.
When he reached the earth some one extended a hand and led him silently out of the garden and into the road beyond. Bob went along meekly and obediently. Not far down the road was a taxicab. Bob got in and his fair rescuer followed. So far he hadn’t said a word to her; language seemed superfluous. But as they dashed away, she murmured:
When he got to the ground, someone reached out a hand and quietly guided him out of the garden and onto the road. Bob walked along submissively and willingly. Not far down the road, there was a taxi. Bob climbed in, and his kind rescuer joined him. So far, he hadn't said anything to her; talking felt unnecessary. But as they drove off, she quietly said:
“Isn’t it lovely?”’
“Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Is it?” he asked. Somehow he wasn’t feeling particularly jubilant over his escape. In fact, he found himself wondering almost as soon as he had reached the earth, if it wouldn’t have been wiser, after all, to have spent the rest of those three weeks in pleasant seclusion. The presence of the temperamental young thing suggested new and more perplexing problems perhaps. He had regarded her as somewhat of a joke, but she wasn’t a joke just now; she was a reality. What was he going to do with her, and with himself, for that matter? Why were they dashing madly across the country like that together?
“Is it?” he asked. Somehow, he didn’t feel particularly happy about his escape. In fact, he found himself wondering almost as soon as he had reached the ground, if it would have been smarter, after all, to have spent the rest of those three weeks in nice solitude. The presence of the unpredictable young woman suggested new and more confusing problems, perhaps. He had thought of her as somewhat of a joke, but she wasn’t a joke right now; she was a reality. What was he going to do with her, and with himself, for that matter? Why were they rushing across the country like that together?
It was as if he were carrying her off, and he certainly didn’t want to do that. He wasn’t in love with her, and she wasn’t with him. At least, he didn’t think she was. It was only her temperamental disposition that caused her to imagine she was in love, because she thought him something that he wasn’t. And when she found out he wasn’t, but was only a plain, ordinary young man, not of much account anyhow, what a shock would be the awakening! Perhaps he’d better stop the machine, go back into the garden, climb up to his room in the crazy-house and tumble into bed? His being here, embarked on a preposterous journey, seemed a case of leaping before looking, or thinking.
It felt like he was taking her away, and he definitely didn't want that. He wasn't in love with her, and she wasn't in love with him. At least, that’s what he thought. It was just her moody nature that made her believe she was in love because she saw him as someone he wasn't. And when she realized he was just an average young guy, not really special at all, what a wake-up call that would be! Maybe he should just stop everything, head back to the garden, go up to his room in that crazy place, and crash into bed? Being here, starting this ridiculous journey, felt like jumping in without thinking it through.
“Why so quiet, darling?” giggled the temperamental young thing, snuggling closer.
“Why so quiet, babe?” giggled the moody young woman, snuggling closer.
“Don’t call me that. I—I won’t stand it.”
“Don’t call me that. I—I can’t take it.”
“All right, dearie.” With another giggle.
“All right, sweetheart.” With another giggle.
“And drop that ‘dearie’ dope, too,” he commanded.
"And drop that 'dearie' nonsense too," he commanded.
“Just as you say. Only what shall I call you?”
“Just as you say. Only what should I call you?”
“I guess plain ‘darn fool’ will do.”
“I guess plain ‘darn fool’ works.”
“Oh, you’re too clever to be called that,” she expostulated.
“Oh, you’re too smart to be called that,” she exclaimed.
“Me, clever?” Scornfully.
“Me, smart?” Scornfully.
“Yes; think how long you have fooled the police.”
“Yes; think about how long you've been tricking the police.”
“I wish you wouldn’t talk such nonsense.” Irritably.
“I wish you wouldn’t talk like that.” Irritably.
“I won’t. On condition!”
"I won't. Only if!"
“What?”
“What’s up?”
“If you’ll put your arm around me.”
“If you’ll put your arm around me.”
“I won’t.”
"I ain't doing it."
“Oh, yes, you will.” She adjusted it for him.
“Oh, yeah, you will.” She fixed it for him.
“All right! If you want some one to hug you when he doesn’t want to!” he said in aggrieved tones.
"Fine! If you want someone to hug you when he doesn't feel like it!" he said, sounding upset.
“That makes it all the nicer,” she returned. “There are ever so many men that want to. This—this is so different!” With a sigh.
“That makes it even better,” she replied. “There are so many guys who want to. This—this is just so different!” With a sigh.
“There you go, with some more nonsense talk!” grumbled Bob.
“There you go, with more nonsense!” grumbled Bob.
“Well,” she giggled, “there’s always a way to make a poor, weak, helpless little thing stop talking.”
“Well,” she laughed, “there’s always a way to make a poor, weak, helpless little thing shut up.”
“Of all the assurance!” he gasped.
“No way!” he gasped.
“I love to have some one I can command to make love to me.”
“I love having someone I can ask to make love to me.”
“I’m going back.” Disgustedly.
“I’m going back.” Disgusted.
“Oh, no, you’re not. You can’t.”
“Oh, no, you’re not. You can’t.”
“Why?”
“Why?”
“You’d be arrested, if you did. They are coming for you. That’s why I came—to circumvent them!”
“You’d get arrested if you did. They’re coming for you. That’s why I came—to get around them!”
“They?”
"They?"
“All has been discovered.”
"Everything has been discovered."
“I fail to understand.”
"I don't understand."
“What did you do with it?” she countered.
“What did you do with it?” she shot back.
“It?”
"It?"
“The swag.”
"The cool stuff."
Bob started to withdraw his arm but she clapped a small warm hand on his big warm hand and held his strong right arm about her slim, adaptable waist. Her head trailed on his shoulder, while she started floating off in dreamland.
Bob began to pull his arm back, but she placed her small warm hand on his big warm hand and wrapped her strong right arm around her slim, adaptable waist. Her head rested on his shoulder as she drifted off into dreamland.
“I just love eloping,” she murmured.
“I just love running away to get married,” she murmured.
“What was that last word?” he observed combatively.
“What was that last word?” he remarked challengingly.
“Elope! elope! elope!” she whispered dreamily, her slim, young feminine figure close to his big masculine bulk.
“Run away together! Run away together! Run away together!” she whispered dreamily, her slim, young figure close to his strong, masculine build.
“So you think you’re eloping with me?” said Bob ominously.
“So you think you’re running away with me?” Bob said darkly.
“I know I am.” In that musical die-away tone. “We’re headed straight for old New York and we’re going to get married in the little church around the corner. Then”—with a happy laugh—“we may have to disguise ourselves and flee.”
“I know I am.” In that melodic fading tone. “We're on our way to old New York and we're going to get married in the little church around the corner. Then”—with a joyful laugh—“we might have to disguise ourselves and run away.”
“May I kindly inquire—that is, if I have any voice in our future operations—why we may have to disguise ourselves?”
“Can I ask—if I have any say in what we do next—why we might need to hide who we are?”
“In case they should want to capture you. The police, I mean.”
“In case they want to catch you. The police, I mean.”
“Police?” he said.
"Police?" he asked.
“Didn’t I just tell you they were coming for you?”
“Didn't I just tell you they were coming for you?”
“Indeed?” He looked down in her eyes to see if she was in earnest. He believed she was. “For what?”
"Really?" He gazed into her eyes to check if she was serious. He thought she was. "About what?"
“Oh, you know.” She raised her lips. “Say, that was a real stingy one, under the oak.”
“Oh, you know.” She smirked. “That was a really cheap move, under the oak.”
“You say all has been discovered?” went on Bob, disregarding her last remark.
“You're saying everything has been figured out?” Bob continued, ignoring her last comment.
“I say that was a real stingy—”
“I say that was really cheap—”
“Hang it!” But he had to. He knew he had to get that idea out of her head, before he could get any more real information from her.
“Forget it!” But he had to. He knew he had to get that idea out of her head before he could get any more useful information from her.
“And think how you deceived poor little me, about it!” she purred contentedly. After all, thought Bob, it didn’t take “much of a one” to satisfy her. She had only wanted “it,” perhaps, because “it” fitted in; “it” went with eloping. Perhaps “it” would have to happen about once so often. Bob hoped not. She was a dainty little tyrant who let him see plainly she had sharp claws. She could scratch as well as purr. Somehow, he felt that he was doubly in her power—that he was doubly her slave now—that something had happened which made him so. He could not imagine what it was.
“And think about how you fooled poor little me, about it!” she purred happily. After all, Bob thought, it didn’t take “much of a one” to please her. She had only wanted “it,” maybe because “it” was part of the plan; “it” matched with eloping. Maybe “it” would have to happen every once in a while. Bob hoped not. She was a delicate little tyrant who made it clear that she had sharp claws. She could scratch as well as purr. Somehow, he felt he was even more under her control—that he was even more her slave now—that something had changed to make him feel that way. He couldn’t figure out what it was.
“They’re keeping it very quiet, though,” she went on. “The robbery, I mean!”
“They’re keeping it really quiet, though,” she continued. “The robbery, I mean!”
“There has been a robbery at Mrs. Ralston’s?”
“There was a robbery at Mrs. Ralston’s?”
“Of course. And you didn’t know a thing about it?” she mocked him.
“Of course. And you had no idea about it?” she teased him.
“I certainly did not.”
"I definitely did not."
“You say that just as if it were so,” she observed admiringly. “I don’t suppose you are aware that some one did really substitute a counterfeit brooch for Mrs. Vanderpool’s wonderful pink pearl and bronze diamond brooch, after all? Oh, no, you don’t know that. You’re only a poor little ignorant dear. Bless its innocent little heart! It didn’t know a thing. Not it!” She was talking baby-talk now, the while her fingers were playing with Bob’s ear. He was so interested in what she was saying, however, that he failed to note the baby-talk and overlooked the liberties she was taking with his hearing apparatus.
“You say that as if it were true,” she said, admiringly. “I bet you don’t even know that someone actually swapped out Mrs. Vanderpool’s amazing pink pearl and bronze diamond brooch for a fake one, right? Oh, no, you’re clueless about that. You’re just a sweet little innocent dear. Bless its naive little heart! It didn’t know a thing. Not at all!” She was speaking in a baby voice now, while her fingers played with Bob’s ear. He was so caught up in what she was saying that he didn’t notice the baby talk or the liberties she was taking with his ear.
“By jove!” he exclaimed. “That accounts for what I thought I saw in the hall that night when I left your room. Imagined I saw some one! Believe now it was some one, after all. And that door I heard click? Whose door is that on the other side of the hall from your room and about twenty-five feet nearer the landing?” Excitedly.
“Wow!” he exclaimed. “That explains what I thought I saw in the hall that night when I left your room. I thought I saw someone! Now I really believe it was someone, after all. And that door I heard click? Whose door is that on the other side of the hall from your room and about twenty-five feet closer to the landing?” Excitedly.
“Gwendoline Gerald’s,” was the unexpected answer.
“Gwendoline Gerald’s,” was the surprising answer.
Bob caught his breath. He was becoming bewildered. “But nothing was missing from Miss Gerald’s room, was there?” he asked.
Bob caught his breath. He was getting confused. “But nothing was missing from Miss Gerald’s room, right?” he asked.
“Don’t you know?” said she.
"Don't you know?" she said.
“I do not.”
"I don't."
“My! aren’t you the beautiful fibber! I’m wondering if you ever tell the truth?”
“My! Aren’t you quite the pretty liar! I’m curious if you ever speak the truth?”
“I don’t tell anything else.” Indignantly. “And that’s the trouble.”
“I don’t say anything more.” She said indignantly. “And that’s the problem.”
“And how well you stick to it!” Admiringly. “If you tell such ones before, how will it be after?”
“And how well you stick to it!” they said, admiringly. “If you tell such things before, how will it be after?”
“After what?” he demanded.
"After what?" he asked.
“The church ceremony,” she giggled.
“The wedding ceremony,” she giggled.
“Don’t you worry about that. There isn’t going to be any.”
“Don’t worry about it. There isn’t going to be any.”
“It’s perfectly lovely of you to say there isn’t. It will be such fun to see you change your mind.” She spoke in that regular on-to-Washington tone. “I can just see you walking up the aisle. Won’t you look handsome? And poor, demure little me! I shan’t look like hardly anything.”
“It’s so nice of you to say there isn’t. It’ll be so much fun to see you change your mind.” She spoke in that typical on-to-Washington tone. “I can totally picture you walking up the aisle. You’ll look so handsome! And poor, shy little me! I won’t look like much at all.”
Bob pretended not to hear.
Bob acted like he didn’t hear.
“You say they are keeping it very quiet about the robbery at the Ralston house. How, then, did you come to know?”
“You're saying they're not talking much about the robbery at the Ralston house. So, how did you find out?”
“Eavesdropping.” Shamelessly. “Thought it was necessary you should know the ‘lay of the land.’ But never mind the ‘how.’ It is sufficient that I managed to overhear Lord Stanfield say he was going to send for you. Gwendoline Gerald knows about the robbery and so does her aunt and Lord Stanfield, but it’s being kept from all the other guests for the present. Even Mrs. Vanderpool doesn’t know. She still thinks the brooch she is wearing is the real one, poor dear! Lord Stanfield discovered it wasn’t. He asked her one day to let him see it. Then, he just said: ‘Aw! How interesting!’—that is, to her. But to Mrs. Ralston he said it was an imitation and that some guest had substituted the false brooch for the real. Mrs. Vanderpool is not to know because Lord Stanfield says the thief must not dream he is suspected. He wants to give him full swing yet a while—‘enough rope to hang himself with,’ were the words he used. It seems Lord Stanfield anticipated things would be missing. He said he knew when a certain person—he didn’t say whom”—gazing up at Bob adoringly—“appeared on the scene, things just went. That’s why Lord Stanfield got asked to the Ralston house. Then when he said he was coming after you, I thought it would be such a joke if you weren’t there to receive him. And that’s why I came to elope with you. And isn’t it all too romantic for anything? I am sure none of those plays comes up to it. Maybe you’ll dramatize our little romance some day—that is—”
“Eavesdropping.” Absolutely without shame. “I thought it was important for you to know the ‘lay of the land.’ But forget about the ‘how.’ What matters is that I managed to overhear Lord Stanfield say he was going to summon you. Gwendoline Gerald is aware of the robbery, as is her aunt and Lord Stanfield, but it’s being kept from all the other guests for now. Even Mrs. Vanderpool doesn’t have a clue. She still believes the brooch she’s wearing is the real one, poor dear! Lord Stanfield found out it wasn’t. He asked her one day if he could take a look at it. Then he just said: ‘Aw! How interesting!’—that is, to her. But to Mrs. Ralston, he said it was a fake and that some guest had swapped the real brooch for the imitation. Mrs. Vanderpool can’t know because Lord Stanfield says the thief must not suspect he’s being watched. He wants to give him a little more time—‘enough rope to hang himself with,’ were his exact words. It seems Lord Stanfield expected things would vanish. He mentioned he knew when a certain person—he didn’t specify who—gazing up at Bob with affection—“showed up, things just went missing. That’s why Lord Stanfield was invited to the Ralston house. So when he said he was coming for you, I thought it would be such a laugh if you weren’t there to greet him. And that’s why I came to run away with you. Isn’t it all just too romantic? I bet none of those plays could compare. Maybe you’ll turn our little romance into a story someday—that is—”
Miss Dolly suddenly stopped. “Isn’t that a car coming up behind?”
Miss Dolly suddenly stopped. “Isn’t that a car coming up behind us?”
Bob looked around, too, and in the far distance saw a light. “Believe it is,” he answered.
Bob looked around as well and spotted a light in the distance. “I believe it is,” he replied.
She leaned forward and spoke to the driver. They were traveling with only one lamp lighted; the driver now put that out. Then he went on until he came to a private roadway, leading into some one’s estate, when quickly turning, he ran along a short distance and finally stopped the car in a dark shaded spot. Bob gazed back and in a short time saw a big car whir by. Idly he wondered whether it contained the police, or the managing medico and some of his staff. Between them, he was promised a right lively time—altogether too lively. He wondered which ones would get him first? It was a kind of a competition and he would be first prize to the winners. Well, it was well to have the enemy—or half of the enemy—in front of him. Of course, the other half might come up any moment behind. He would have to take that chance, he thought, as they now returned to the highway. Meanwhile Miss Dolly’s eyes were bright with excitement. She was enjoying herself very much.
She leaned forward and talked to the driver. They were traveling with just one lamp on; the driver turned it off. Then he continued until he reached a private road leading to someone's estate, where he quickly turned and drove short distance before stopping the car in a dark, shaded spot. Bob looked back and soon saw a large car speed by. He idly wondered if it was the police or the managing doctor with some of his staff. He was promised a pretty wild time—way too wild. He wondered which ones would catch him first. It felt like a competition, and he would be the grand prize for the winners. Well, it was good to have the enemy—or half of the enemy—in front of him. Of course, the other half could show up any moment behind him. He figured he would have to take that chance as they returned to the highway. Meanwhile, Miss Dolly’s eyes sparkled with excitement. She was having a great time.
CHAPTER XIV—MUTINY
They resumed the conversation where they had left off.
They picked up the conversation where they had left off.
“It seems to me,” said Bob, “from all you say, that monocle-man has been a mighty busy person.”
“It seems to me,” said Bob, “from everything you’ve said, that the guy with the monocle has been really busy.”
“Of course you knew right along what he is. You didn’t need any information from poor little me about him. He couldn’t fool great big You!” she affirmed admiringly.
“Of course you always knew what he is. You didn’t need any info from poor little me about him. He couldn’t trick awesome you!” she said with admiration.
“I can imagine what he is—now,” observed Bob meditatively. He was turning over in his mind what she had said about that substituted brooch. The some one Bob had imagined he had seen in the hall, after leaving Miss Dolly’s room, might not have been the real thief, after all; it might have been the monocle-man on the lookout for the thief. And perhaps the monocle-man had seen Bob. That was the reason he was “coming for him.” Bob could imagine dear old dad’s feelings, if he (Bob) got sent to Sing Sing. What if, instead of rustling and rising to the occasion, in that fine, old honorable Japanese way, Bob should bring irretrievable disgrace on an eminently respectable family name?
“I can picture who he is—now,” Bob said thoughtfully. He was considering what she had mentioned about that swapped brooch. The person Bob thought he had seen in the hall after leaving Miss Dolly’s room might not have been the actual thief; it could have been the monocle guy watching for the thief. And maybe the monocle guy had noticed Bob. That’s why he was “coming for him.” Bob could just imagine how his dad would feel if he (Bob) ended up in Sing Sing. What if, instead of stepping up and handling the situation in that classic, honorable Japanese way, Bob caused irreparable shame to a perfectly respectable family name?
He could see himself in stripes now, with his head shaved, and doing the lock-step. Perhaps, even at that moment, descriptions of him were being sent broadcast. And if so, it would look as if he were running away from the officers of the law, which would be tantamount to a confession of guilt. Bob shivered. The temperamental young thing did not share his apprehensions.
He could see himself in stripes now, with his head shaved, doing the lock-step. Maybe, even at that moment, descriptions of him were being sent out on the airwaves. And if that was the case, it would look like he was trying to escape from the police, which would basically be an admission of guilt. Bob shivered. The temperamental young woman didn’t share his worries.
“Of course, Lord Stanfield only thinks he has evidence enough to convict you,” she said confidently. “But you’ll meet him at every point and turn the laugh on him.”
“Of course, Lord Stanfield only thinks he has enough proof to convict you,” she said confidently. “But you’ll outsmart him at every turn and have the last laugh.”
“Oh, will I?” said Bob ironically.
“Oh, will I?” Bob said sarcastically.
“And you’ll make him feel so cheap! Of course, you’ve got something up your sleeve—”
“And you’ll make him feel so used! Of course, you have something planned—”
“Wish I had,” he muttered.
“Wish I had,” he said.
“Something deep and mysterious,” she went on in that confident tone. “That’s why you acted so queer toward some people. You had a purpose. It was a ruse. Wasn’t it now?” she concluded triumphantly.
“Something deep and mysterious,” she continued in that self-assured tone. “That’s why you acted so strangely around certain people. You had a goal. It was a trick. Wasn’t it?” she finished with a sense of victory.
“It was not.” Gruffly.
“Nope.” Gruffly.
“Fibber! every time you fib, you’ve got to—” She put up her lips.
"Fibber! Every time you lie, you have to—" She puckered her lips.
“This is getting monotonous,” grumbled Bob.
“This is getting boring,” grumbled Bob.
“On the contrary!” breathed the temperamental young thing. “I find it lovely. Maybe you’ll learn how sometime.”
“On the contrary!” she said with a huff. “I think it’s lovely. Maybe you’ll figure that out someday.”
“Don’t want to,” he snapped.
"Not interested," he snapped.
“Oh, yes, you do. But as I was saying, you got yourself put in that sanatorium to mislead everybody. It, too, was a ruse—a part of the game. It’s all very clear—at least, to me!”
“Oh, yes, you do. But like I was saying, you got yourself placed in that sanatorium to trick everyone. That was also part of the plan—a part of the game. It’s all pretty clear—at least to me!”
He stared at her. And she called that clear? “When did you leave Mrs. Ralston’s?” he demanded.
He stared at her. And she thought that was clear? “When did you leave Mrs. Ralston's?” he asked.
“About three hours ago. Said I’d a headache and believed I’d go to my room. But I didn’t. I just slipped down to the village and hired a taxi. Maybe we’d better keep our marriage a secret, at first.” Irrelevantly.
“About three hours ago. I said I had a headache and thought I’d go to my room. But I didn’t. I just went down to the village and hired a taxi. Maybe we should keep our marriage a secret at first.” Irrelevantly.
“Maybe we had,” answered Bob. And then he called out to the man in front. “Stop a moment.”
“Maybe we did,” Bob replied. Then he shouted to the man ahead. “Hold on a second.”
Before Miss Dolly had time to expostulate, the driver obeyed. Bob sprang out.
Before Miss Dolly had a chance to protest, the driver complied. Bob jumped out.
“You aren’t going to leave me, are you?” said the temperamental little thing. “If so—” She made as if to get out, too.
“You're not going to leave me, are you?” said the temperamental little thing. “If you are—” She pretended to get up and leave, too.
“No; I’m not going to leave you just yet,” answered Bob. Then to the driver: “See here! Your blamed machine is turned in the wrong direction. You know where you’re going to take us?”
“No; I’m not leaving you just yet,” Bob replied. Then to the driver: “Hey! Your darn machine is facing the wrong way. Do you even know where you’re taking us?”
“New York.”
“NY.”
“No; back to Mrs. Ralston’s. You take the first cross-road you come to and steer right for there.”
“No; back to Mrs. Ralston’s. Take the first side road you find and head straight there.”
“You’re not to do any such thing,” called out Miss Dolly. “You’re to go where I tell you.”
“You’re not going to do any such thing,” Miss Dolly shouted. “You’re going to go where I tell you.”
“You’re to do nothing of the sort,” said Bob. “You’re to go where I tell you.”
“You’re not going to do any of that,” said Bob. “You’re going to go where I tell you.”
The driver scratched his head.
The driver scratched his head.
“Which is it to be?” asked Bob. “This is the place to have an understanding.”
“Which one is it going to be?” asked Bob. “This is the right time to come to an agreement.”
“The lady hired me,” he answered.
“The lady hired me,” he replied.
“Yes, and I won’t pay you at all, if you don’t mind,” said Miss Dolly in firm musical accents.
“Yes, and I won’t pay you anything at all, if that’s okay with you,” said Miss Dolly in a confident, melodic voice.
“Guess that settles it,” observed the driver.
“Guess that settles it,” the driver said.
“You mean—?” began Bob, eying him.
“You mean—?” Bob started, looking at him.
“It means I obey orders. She’s my ‘fare,’ not you. We just picked you up.”
“It means I follow orders. She’s my ‘ride,’ not you. We just picked you up.”
“And that’s your last word?” Ominously.
“And that’s your final word?” Ominously.
“Say, lady”—the driver turned wearily—“have I got to suppress this crazy man you got out of the bughouse?”
“Hey, lady”—the driver turned tiredly—“do I have to deal with this crazy guy you brought out of the loony bin?”
“Maybe that would be a good plan,” answered Miss Dolly, militancy now in her tone. “That is, if he doesn’t get in, just sweet and quiet-like.”
“Maybe that would be a good plan,” replied Miss Dolly, now sounding determined. “That is, if he doesn’t come in all sweet and quietly.”
“It’ll be twenty dollars extra,” said the man, rising. He was a big fellow, too.
“It’ll be an extra twenty dollars,” said the man, getting up. He was a big guy, too.
“Make it thirty,” returned Miss Dolly spiritedly. It was an issue and had to be met. There was an accent of “On-to-Parliament!” in her voice. One can’t show too much mercy to a “slave” when he revolts. One has to suppress him. One has to teach him who is mistress. A stern lesson, and the slave learns and knows his place.
“Make it thirty,” Miss Dolly replied energetically. It was a situation that needed to be addressed. There was a tone of “On-to-Parliament!” in her voice. You can’t show too much mercy to a “slave” when he rebels. You have to put him in his place. You have to teach him who’s in charge. A tough lesson, and the slave learns and understands his role.
“Now mind the lady and get back where you belong,” said the driver roughly to Bob. “Your tiles are loose, and the lady knows what is good for a dingbat like you.” Possibly he thought the display of a little authority would be quite sufficient to intimidate a recent “patient.” They usually became quite mild, he had heard, when the keepers talked right up to them, like that. The effect of his language and attitude upon Bob was not, however, quieting; something seemed to explode in his brain and he made one spring and got a football hold; then he heaved and the big man shot over his shoulder as if propelled from a catapult. He came down in a ditch, where the breath seemed to be knocked out of him. Bob got on in front. As he started the machine, the man sat up and looked after him. He didn’t try to get up though; he just looked. No doubt he had had the surprise of his life.
“Now pay attention to the lady and get back to your place,” said the driver harshly to Bob. “Your tiles are loose, and the lady knows what's best for a fool like you.” He probably thought a little show of authority would be enough to scare a recent “patient.” They usually became quite docile, he had heard, when the staff spoke to them like that. However, Bob didn’t feel calmed by his words or attitude; something seemed to ignite in his mind, and he lunged forward, grabbing him like a football tackle. Then he threw the big man over his shoulder as if he were shot from a cannon. He landed in a ditch, gasping for breath. Bob moved to the front. As he started the engine, the man sat up and stared after him. He didn’t attempt to get up; he just watched. No doubt it was the surprise of his life.
“I’ll leave the car in the village when I’m through with it,” Bob called back. “A little walk won’t hurt you.”
“I'll leave the car in the village when I'm done with it,” Bob called back. “A little walk won't hurt you.”
The man didn’t answer. “Gee! but that’s a powerful lunatic for a poor young lady to have on her hands!” he said to himself.
The man didn’t reply. “Wow! That's quite the crazy person for a poor young lady to deal with!” he thought to himself.
An hour or so later Bob drew up in front of Mrs. Ralston’s house. He opened the door politely for Miss Dolly and the temperamental young thing sprang out. The guests were still up, indulging in one of those late dances that begin at the stroke of twelve, and the big house showed lights everywhere. There were numerous other taxis and cars in front and Bob’s arrival attracted no particular attention. Miss Dolly gave him a look, militant, but still adoring. She let him see she had claws.
An hour later, Bob pulled up in front of Mrs. Ralston’s house. He opened the door politely for Miss Dolly, and the spirited young woman hopped out. The guests were still up, enjoying one of those late-night dances that kick off at midnight, and the large house was lit up all over. There were plenty of other taxis and cars parked out front, so Bob’s arrival didn’t draw any special attention. Miss Dolly shot him a fierce look, but it was still filled with affection. She made sure he knew she had a sharp side.
“Maybe I’ll tell,” she said.
“Maybe I’ll share,” she said.
“Go ahead,” he answered.
"Go ahead," he replied.
“Aren’t you afraid?”
"Don't you feel scared?"
“No.” He hadn’t done anything wrong.
“No.” He hadn't done anything wrong.
“Aren’t you even sorry?” she asked, lingering.
“Aren’t you even sorry?” she asked, hanging around.
“For what?”
"What's that for?"
“Being so rough to that poor man?”
“Why were you so harsh to that poor guy?”
“I’m not. Good night.”
“Not me. Good night.”
“Good night—darling.” She threw out that last word as a challenge. It had a tender but sibilant sound. It was a mixture of a caress and a scratch. It meant she hadn’t given up her hold on him. He might have defeated her in one little contest, but she would weave new ways to entrap him. She might even manage to make him out a murderer—he had been so many things since embarking on that mercurial truth-telling career—and then she would give him the choice of the altar or the chair.
“Good night—babe.” She threw out that last word as a challenge. It had a gentle yet sharp sound. It was a mix of a caress and a sting. It showed she hadn’t released her grip on him. He might have won one small battle, but she would find new ways to reel him in. She might even manage to paint him as a murderer—he had been so many things since starting that unpredictable truth-telling gig—and then she would give him the choice between the altar or the electric chair.
He started the machine and she watched him disappear, musingly. There was a steely light, too, in her eyes. He was a mutineer and mutineers should, figuratively, be made to walk the plank. Should she put him in jail and then come and weep penitently? At least, it would be thrilling. Certainly anything was better than that cast-off feeling. She felt no better than cast-off clothes. This great big brute of a handsome man, instead of jumping at the chance to elope with one who had everything to offer such a one as he, had just turned around and brought her back home.
He started the machine and she watched him disappear, deep in thought. There was a fierce light in her eyes, too. He was a rebel, and rebels should, in a way, be made to face consequences. Should she lock him up and then come back to weep in remorse? At least that would be exciting. Anything was better than feeling abandoned. She felt no better than discarded clothes. This big, handsome guy, instead of seizing the chance to run away with someone who had so much to offer him, just turned around and brought her back home.
Maybe he thought she wasn’t worthy of him. Oh, wasn’t she? Her small breast arose mutinously, while that cast-off sensation kept growing and growing. After rescuing him and saving him, instead of calling her “his beautiful doll” or other pet names, and humming glad songs to her—how they would “row, row, row” on some beautiful river of love—or stroll, stroll, stroll through pathways of perfume and bliss—instead of regaling her with these and other up-to-date expressions, appropriate to the occasion, he had repudiated her, cast her off, deposited her here on the front steps, unceremoniously, carelessly, indifferently.
Maybe he thought she wasn’t good enough for him. Oh, wasn’t she? Her small breast stood up defiantly, while that feeling of being discarded kept growing and growing. After saving him and helping him, instead of calling her “his beautiful doll” or using other sweet names and singing cheerful songs to her—how they would “row, row, row” on some lovely river of love—or walk, walk, walk through paths filled with perfume and happiness—instead of charming her with these and other modern phrases fitting for the moment, he had rejected her, pushed her away, left her here on the front steps, with no respect, care, or concern.
Her cheeks burned at the affront. It was too humiliating. The little hands closed. The temperamental fingernails bit into the tender palms. At that moment the monocle-man sauntered out of the house and on to the veranda, near where Miss Dolly was standing. She turned to him quickly. Her temperament had about reached the Borgia pitch.
Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. It was way too humiliating. Her little hands tightened into fists. Her sharp fingernails dug into her soft palms. At that moment, the man with the monocle walked out of the house and onto the porch, right where Miss Dolly was standing. She turned to him quickly. Her mood had nearly reached a breaking point.
Bob went on down to the village and to the taxi stand near the station where he had promised to leave the machine. The last train had just passed by, after depositing the last of late-comers from the gay metropolis. Most of them looked fagged; a few were mildly “corned.” Bob regarded them absently and then gave a violent start.
Bob walked down to the village and to the taxi stand near the station where he had promised to leave the car. The last train had just come through, dropping off the last of the late arrivals from the vibrant city. Most of them looked exhausted; a few were slightly tipsy. Bob glanced at them absentmindedly and then suddenly jolted.
“Gee-gee!” he gasped.
“Wow!” he gasped.
There she was, in truth, the beauteous Gee-gee, and the fair Gid-up, too! Bob gazed in consternation from reddish hair to peroxide. The two carried grips and were dressed in their best—that is to say, each wore the last thing in hats and the final gasp in gowns.
There she was, truly, the beautiful Gee-gee, and the lovely Gid-up, too! Bob stared in shock from the reddish hair to the peroxide. The two were carrying bags and were dressed to impress—that is to say, each wore the latest in hats and the most stylish gowns.
“Guess none of those society dames will have a thing on us, when it comes to rags,” Gid-up murmured to Gee-gee, as they crossed the platform with little teeny-weeny steps and headed toward a belated hack or two and Bob’s machine. That young man yet sat on the driver’s seat of the taxi; he was too paralyzed to move as he watched them approach. Where on earth were Gee-gee and Gid-up going? He feared to learn. He had an awful suspicion.
“Looks like none of those society ladies are going to compare to us when it comes to clothes,” Gid-up whispered to Gee-gee as they walked across the platform with tiny steps, heading towards a couple of late carriages and Bob's car. That young man was still sitting in the driver's seat of the taxi; he was too stunned to move as he watched them come closer. Where on earth were Gee-gee and Gid-up off to? He was afraid to find out. He had a terrible suspicion.
“Chauffeur!” Gee-gee raised a begloved finger as she hailed Bob. The glove had seen better days, but Gee-gee didn’t bother much about gloves. When she had attained the finality in hats and the ne plus ultra in skirts, hosiery and stilts (you asked for “shoes”) she hadn’t much time, or cash, left for gloves which were always about the same old thing over and over again, anyway. “Chauffeur!” repeated Gee-gee.
“Chauffeur!” Gee-gee raised a gloved finger as she signaled Bob. The glove had seen better days, but Gee-gee didn’t care much about gloves. Once she had perfected her hats and reached the ultimate style in skirts, hosiery, and heels (you asked for “shoes”), she didn’t have much time or money left for gloves, which were always the same boring thing anyway. “Chauffeur!” Gee-gee shouted again.
“Meaning me?” inquired Bob in muffled tones. Why didn’t she take a hack? He had drawn up his taxi toward the dark end of the platform.
“Meaning me?” Bob asked quietly. Why didn’t she get a cab? He had pulled his taxi up to the dark end of the platform.
“Yes, meaning you!” replied Gee-gee sharply. “Can’t say I see any other human spark-plug in this one-night burg.”
“Yes, I mean you!” replied Gee-gee sharply. “Can’t say I see any other human spark-plug in this one-night town.”
“What can I do for you?” stammered Bob. He was glad it was so shadowy where he sat, and he devoutly hoped he would escape recognition.
“What can I do for you?” stammered Bob. He was relieved it was so dim where he sat, and he really hoped he would avoid being recognized.
“What can he do? Did you hear that?” Gee-gee appealed indignantly to Gid-up. “I don’t suppose a great jink like you knows enough to get down and take a lady’s bag? Or, to open the door of the limousine?”
“What can he do? Did you hear that?” Gee-gee asked angrily, turning to Gid-up. “I doubt someone like you knows how to get down and grab a lady’s bag. Or to open the door of the limo?”
“Well, you see this machine’s engaged,” mumbled Bob. “No, I don’t mean that.” Hastily. “I mean I’m not the driver of this car. It doesn’t belong to me. And that’s the truth.”
“Well, you see this machine’s engaged,” mumbled Bob. “No, I don’t mean that.” Hastily. “I mean I’m not the driver of this car. It doesn’t belong to me. And that’s the truth.”
“Where is the driver?” Haughtily. “Send for him at once.” Gee-gee did not like to be crossed. Gid-up was more good-natured; she only shifted her gum.
“Where's the driver?” she said arrogantly. “Get him here right now.” Gee-gee didn’t like being challenged. Gid-up was more easygoing; she just moved her gum around.
“I can’t send for him,” said Bob drawing his hat down farther over his face. “He’s down the road.”
“I can’t call for him,” said Bob, pulling his hat down farther over his face. “He’s down the road.”
“What’s he doing there?”
“What’s he doing here?”
“I don’t know. Maybe, he’s walking; maybe, he’s sitting in the ditch.”
“I don’t know. Maybe he’s walking; maybe he’s sitting in the ditch.”
Gee-gee stared, but she could see only a big shadowy form; she couldn’t make out Bob’s features. “The boob’s got bees,” she confided to Gid-up, and then more imperatively: “Are you going to get off your perch and let us in?”
Gee-gee stared, but she could only see a large shadowy shape; she couldn’t make out Bob’s features. “The idiot’s got bees,” she told Gid-up, and then more urgently: “Are you going to get off your spot and let us in?”
“Beg to be excused,” muttered Bob. “Hack over there! Quick! Before some one else gets it.”
“Please let me be excused,” muttered Bob. “Hurry over there! Quick! Before someone else grabs it.”
That started them away. The teeny-weeny steps encompassed, accelerando, the distance between Bob and his old friend, the hackman who had laughed at what he supposed were Bob’s eccentricities. The hackman got down and hoisted in the grips.
That got them moving. The tiny steps quickly closed the gap between Bob and his old friend, the cab driver who had laughed at what he thought were Bob’s quirks. The cab driver got out and lifted the bags inside.
“Where to?” he said.
“Where to?” he asked.
Bob listened expectantly. He feared what was coming.
Bob listened, waiting anxiously. He was afraid of what was about to happen.
“Mrs. Ralston’s,” answered Gee-gee haughtily. At the same time Gid-up threw away her gum. She would have to practise being without it.
“Mrs. Ralston’s,” replied Gee-gee arrogantly. At the same time, Gid-up tossed her gum aside. She would need to practice being without it.
Bob drearily watched the hack roll away. He refused another offer of a fare—this time from a bibulous individual who had supped, not wisely, but too well—and nearly got into a fight because the bibulous individual was persistent and discursive. Then Bob walked away; he didn’t think where he was going; he only wanted to get away from that chauffeur job. What would come of these new developments, he wondered? The temperamental young thing was “peeved,” and the ponies (not equine) had come galloping into the scene at the critical moment.
Bob drearily watched the cab drive off. He turned down another fare—this time from a drunken guy who had drunk too much, not wisely, but definitely too much—and almost got into a fight because the drunk guy wouldn’t give up and kept rambling. Then Bob walked away; he didn’t really think about where he was going; he just wanted to escape that chauffeur job. What would happen because of these new changes, he wondered? The moody young woman was “peeved,” and the high-strung people had rushed onto the scene at just the right moment.
He tried to account for their presence. Undoubtedly it was a coup of Mrs. Dan’s. When she learned that dear Dan was bringing counter-influence to bear upon her witnesses, she arranged to remove them. She brought them right into her own camp. How? Gee-gee and Gid-up did a really clever and fairly refined musical and dancing act together. Mrs. Ralston frequently called upon professional talent to help her out in the entertaining line. It is true, Gee-gee and Gid-up were hardly “high enough up,” or well enough known, to commend themselves ordinarily to the good hostess in search of the best and most expensive artists, but then Mrs. Dan may have brought influence to bear upon Mrs. Ralston. And Mrs. Clarence may have seconded Mrs. Dan’s efforts. They may have said Gee-gee and Gid-up were dashing and different, and would be, at least, a change. They may have exaggerated the talents of the pair and pictured them as rising stars whom it would be a credit for Mrs. Ralston to discover. The hostess was extremely good-natured and liked to oblige her friends, or to comply with their requests.
He tried to figure out why they were there. It was definitely a move by Mrs. Dan. When she found out that dear Dan was trying to sway her witnesses, she made sure to pull them into her camp. How? Gee-gee and Gid-up put on a really clever and somewhat classy musical and dance act together. Mrs. Ralston often called on professional talent to help her with entertainment. It’s true that Gee-gee and Gid-up weren't exactly "high profile" or well-known enough to typically appeal to a good hostess looking for the top-tier artists, but Mrs. Dan might have influenced Mrs. Ralston. And Mrs. Clarence may have backed up Mrs. Dan’s efforts. They might have said that Gee-gee and Gid-up were exciting and different, and would at least provide a change. They could have exaggerated the pair's talents and presented them as rising stars that it would be impressive for Mrs. Ralston to discover. The hostess was very easygoing and liked to help her friends or fulfill their requests.
Of course, the young ladies would not appear on the scene as Gee-gee and Gid-up, in all probability. No doubt, they would assume other and more appropriate cognomens (non equine). The last show they had played in, had just closed, so a little society engagement, with strong publicity possibilities, on the side, could not be anything but appealing, especially to Gee-gee with her practical tendencies. Of course, they would have to make a brave effort to put on their society manners, but Gid-up had once had a home and Gee-gee knew how people talked in the society novels. Trust Gee-gee to adapt herself!
Of course, the young women wouldn’t show up as Gee-gee and Gid-up, most likely. They would probably pick other, more suitable names (not horse-related). The last show they had performed in had just wrapped up, so a little social engagement, with plenty of publicity potential, on the side, was definitely enticing, especially for Gee-gee with her practical mindset. They would have to make a real effort to put on their polished social manners, but Gid-up had once had a home, and Gee-gee knew how people behaved in society novels. You can always count on Gee-gee to fit in!
Bob felt he could figure it all out. Their coming so late would seem to indicate they had been sent for in haste. Mrs. Dan, perhaps, had become alarmed and wasn’t going to take any more chances with the commodore who was capable of sequestering her witnesses, of inveigling them on board one of his friend’s yachts, for example, and then marooning them on a desert isle, or transporting them to one of those cafe chantants of Paris. Besides, with that after-midnight “hug” and “grizzly” going on, Mrs. Dan knew it wouldn’t much matter how late the pair arrived.
Bob felt he could figure it all out. Their late arrival suggested they had been called in a hurry. Mrs. Dan, perhaps, had gotten worried and didn’t want to risk anything more with the commodore, who was capable of hiding her witnesses, like tricking them onto one of his friend's yachts and then abandoning them on a deserted island, or taking them to one of those lively cafes in Paris. Besides, with that after-midnight “hug” and “grizzly” happening, Mrs. Dan knew it wouldn’t matter much how late the couple showed up.
By the time Bob had argued this out, he was a long way from the village. He had been walking mechanically toward the Ralston house and now found himself on the verge of the grounds. After a moment’s hesitation, he went in and walked up to the house. The dancing had, at length, ceased and the big edifice was now almost dark. The inmates, or most of them, seemed to have retired. A few of the men might yet be lingering in the smoking-room or over billiards. For a minute or two Bob stood in silent meditation. Then his glance swept toward a certain trellis, and a sudden thought smote him.
By the time Bob finished arguing this out, he was far from the village. He had been walking automatically toward the Ralston house and now found himself at the edge of the property. After a moment’s hesitation, he entered and approached the house. The dancing had finally stopped, and the large building was now almost dark. Most of the residents seemed to have gone to bed. A few of the men might still be hanging out in the smoking room or playing billiards. For a minute or two, Bob stood in silent thought. Then his gaze shifted toward a particular trellis, and a sudden realization hit him.
Wasn’t he still Mrs. Ralston’s guest? The period for which he had been invited hadn’t expired and he hadn’t, as yet, been asked to vacate the premises. True, some people had forcibly, and in a most highhanded manner, removed him for a brief period, but they had not been acting for Mrs. Ralston, or by her orders. He was, therefore, legitimately still a guest and it was obviously his duty not to waive the responsibility. He might not want to come back but he had to. That even-tenor-of-his-way condition demanded it. Besides, manhood revolted against retreat under fire. To run away, as he had told himself in the car with Miss Dolly, was a confession of guilt. He must face them once more—even Miss Gerald and the hammer-thrower. He could in fancy, see himself handcuffed in her presence, but he couldn’t help it. Better that, than to be hunted in the byways and hovels of New York! Oddly, too, the idea of a big comfortable bed appealed to him.
Wasn’t he still Mrs. Ralston’s guest? The time he was invited for hadn’t run out, and he hadn’t been asked to leave yet. Sure, some people had forcefully kicked him out for a little while, but they weren’t acting on Mrs. Ralston's behalf or by her orders. So, he was still a legitimate guest, and it was clearly his responsibility not to walk away from that. He might not want to return, but he had to. That steady pace of his life required it. Plus, being a man meant he wouldn’t back down when things got tough. Running away, as he told himself in the car with Miss Dolly, was admitting defeat. He had to confront them again—even Miss Gerald and the hammer-thrower. He could picture himself handcuffed in her presence, but there was no choice. Better that than being chased around the back streets and slums of New York! Strangely enough, the idea of a big comfy bed sounded really nice to him.
He climbed up the trellis and stood on the balcony upon which his room opened. Pushing up a window, he entered and feeling around in the darkness he came upon his grip where he had left it. He drew the curtains, turned on the lights and undressed. He acted just as if nothing had happened. Then, donning his pajamas, he turned out the lights, drew back the curtains once more, and tumbled into the downy.
He climbed up the trellis and stood on the balcony outside his room. He pushed up a window, climbed in, and in the dark, he found his bag where he had left it. He pulled the curtains, turned on the lights, and changed out of his clothes. He acted like nothing had happened. Then, putting on his pajamas, he switched off the lights, pulled back the curtains again, and fell into the soft bed.
CHAPTER XV—AN EXTRAORDINARY INTERVIEW
But he could not sleep; his brain was too busy. He wondered in what part of the house Gee-gee and Gid-up were domiciled? He wondered if Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were drawing up affidavits? He wondered if that taxicab man had yet come to town and if he would get out a warrant, charging him (Bob) with assault? He wondered if Dan and Clarence knew Gee-gee and Gid-up were here, and if so, what would they do about it? Would they, too, come prancing on the scene? He wondered if Miss Gerald were engaged to the hammer-man? He wondered if the maniac-medico would think of looking for him (Bob) here? He wondered where the police were looking for him and who was the thief, anyway? This last mental query led him to consider the guests, one by one.
But he couldn't sleep; his mind was racing. He wondered where Gee-gee and Gid-up were staying in the house. He wondered if Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were preparing affidavits. He wondered if that taxi driver had arrived in town yet and if he would file a warrant, accusing him (Bob) of assault. He wondered if Dan and Clarence knew that Gee-gee and Gid-up were there, and if so, what they would do about it. Would they come rushing in too? He wondered if Miss Gerald was engaged to the hammer-man. He wondered if the crazy doctor would think to look for him (Bob) there. He wondered where the police were searching for him and who the thief was, anyway. This last thought led him to think about the guests, one by one.
He began with the bishop. Suspicion, of course, could not point in that direction. Still, there was that play, Deacon Brodie—a very good man was a thief in it. But a deacon wasn’t a bishop. Besides, Bob had great respect for the cloth. He dismissed the bishop with an inward apology. He next considered the judge, but the judge was too portly for those agile sleight-of-hand feats and the deft foot-work required. He passed on to the doctor. The doctor had delicate little hands, adapted for filching work, but he was too much absorbed in cutting up little dogs and cats to care for such insensible trifles as glittering gee-gaws. The doctor might be capable of absconding with a Fido or somebody’s pet Meow, but an inanimate Kooh-i-nor would hold for him no temptations. So from Doc, Bob passed on to Mrs. Van. But she wouldn’t surreptitiously appropriate her own brooch. He even considered the temperamental young thing whose interest in crime and criminals was really shocking.
He started with the bishop. Of course, suspicion couldn’t point that way. Still, there was that play, Deacon Brodie—a really good man was a thief in it. But a deacon isn’t a bishop. Plus, Bob had a lot of respect for the clergy. He dismissed the bishop with a silent apology. Next, he thought about the judge, but the judge was too heavyset for those quick sleight-of-hand tricks and the nimble footwork needed. He moved on to the doctor. The doctor had delicate little hands, perfect for stealing, but he was too focused on cutting up little dogs and cats to bother with such trivial things as shiny trinkets. The doctor might be able to steal a Fido or someone’s pet Meow, but a non-living Kooh-i-nor wouldn’t tempt him at all. So from the doctor, Bob shifted his thoughts to Mrs. Van. But she wouldn’t sneakily take her own brooch. He even thought about the moody young woman whose fascination with crime and criminals was honestly shocking.
He had got about this far in thrashing things over in his mind when a rather startling realization that he wasn’t alone in the room smote him. Some one was over there—at the window, and that some one had softly crossed the room. Bob made an involuntary movement, turning in bed to see plainer, when with a slight sound of suppressed surprise, the some one almost magically disappeared. Bob couldn’t tell whether he had gone out of the window, or had sprung back into the room and was now concealing himself behind the heavy curtains. The young man made a sudden rush for the window and grab for the curtain, only to discover there was no one there; nor could he see any one on the balcony, or climbing down. He did see below, however, a skulking figure fast vanishing among the shrubbery. A moment, the thought of the commodore insinuated itself in the young man’s bewildered brain, but the commodore would not again be trying to see him (Bob) here, for the very good reason that Dan could not know Bob was here. No one yet knew Bob had returned to Mrs. Ralston’s house. The commodore and Clarence no doubt still believed Bob to be shut up in a cute little cubby-hole with bars.
He had gotten this far in sorting through his thoughts when he suddenly realized he wasn’t alone in the room. Someone was over by the window, and that someone had quietly crossed the room. Bob involuntarily turned in bed to see better, when, with a slight sound of suppressed surprise, the person almost instantly vanished. Bob couldn't tell if they had gone out the window or jumped back into the room and were now hiding behind the heavy curtains. The young man quickly rushed to the window and grabbed for the curtain, only to find no one there; he also couldn’t see anyone on the balcony or climbing down. However, he did spot a lurking figure quickly disappearing into the shrubs below. For a moment, the thought of the commodore crossed the young man’s confused mind, but the commodore wouldn’t be trying to see him here, for a very good reason: Dan couldn’t know Bob was here. No one knew Bob had returned to Mrs. Ralston’s house yet. The commodore and Clarence probably still thought Bob was stuck in a cute little cell with bars.
The skulking figure below, then, could be dissociated from the complicated domestic tangle; his proper place was in that other silent drama, dealing with mysterious peculations. Should Bob climb down, follow and attempt to capture him? Bob had on only his pajamas and already the fellow was far away. He would lead any one a fine chase and Bob hadn’t any special desire to go romping over hills in his present attire, or want of attire. If any one caught him doing it, what excuse could he make? That he was chasing an accomplice of a thief inside the house who had probably dropped his glittering booty for his pal to take away? But he (Bob) was supposed to be that inside-operator, himself, and he wouldn’t be chasing his own pal. Or again, if he were detected in that sprinting performance by those who didn’t know he was supposed to be an inside-operator, but who thought him only a plain crazy man, wouldn’t the necessity for his reincarceration be but emphasized? Maybe this latter contingent of his enemies would consider a plain, public insane asylum, without flowers in the window, good enough for him. They, undoubtedly, would so conclude if they knew the state of Bob’s private fortune, which certainly did not justify private institutions.
The sneaky figure below could be separated from the complicated mess at home; his real role was in that other quiet drama, involving mysterious thefts. Should Bob climb down, follow him, and try to catch him? Bob was only in his pajamas, and the guy was already far away. He would lead anyone on a wild chase, and Bob had no real desire to be running around in the hills in his current outfit—or lack of it. If anyone saw him doing it, what excuse could he give? That he was chasing a partner of a thief inside the house who probably dropped his shiny loot for his buddy to grab? But Bob was supposed to be that inside guy himself, and he wouldn’t be chasing his own partner. Plus, if he got caught sprinting by those who didn’t know he was meant to be the inside guy, but thought he was just a regular crazy person, wouldn’t that just make it more likely he’d end up back where he didn’t want to be? Maybe that group of his enemies would think a normal, public mental hospital, without flowers in the windows, was good enough for him. They definitely would reach that conclusion if they knew the state of Bob’s personal finances, which surely didn’t justify private institutions.
A slight noise behind him drove all these considerations from Bob’s mind. He dove at once in the direction of the sound, only to fall over his grip, and as he sprawled, not heroically, in the dark, his door was opened and closed almost noiselessly. Exasperated, he gathered himself together and made for the door. Throwing it back, he gazed down the hall, only to see a figure swiftly vanishing around a dimly-lighted corner. Bob couldn’t make out whether it was a man or a woman, but seeing no one else in the hall, he impetuously and recklessly darted after it. When he reached the corner, however, the figure was gone.
A faint noise behind him pushed all of Bob’s thoughts aside. He immediately lunged toward the sound, only to trip over his own feet, sprawling unceremoniously in the dark. Just then, his door creaked open and closed almost silently. Frustrated, he picked himself up and headed for the door. Swinging it open, he looked down the hall, only to see a figure quickly disappearing around a dimly lit corner. Bob couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman, but with no one else in the hallway, he impulsively and recklessly chased after it. When he got to the corner, though, the figure had vanished.
Bob stood in a quandary. There were a good many different doors around that corner. Through which one had his mysterious visitor vanished? If he but knew, he felt certain he could place his hand on the much wanted individual who was making such a nuisance of himself in social circles. He might be able to rid society of one of those essentially modern pests, and at the same time lift the mantle of suspicion from himself. At least, he would be partly rehabilitated. Later, he might complete the process. And oh, to have her once more see him as he was.
Bob was in a tough spot. There were a lot of different doors around that corner. Which one had his mysterious visitor disappeared through? If only he knew, he was sure he could finally track down the annoying person causing so much trouble in social circles. He might be able to get rid of one of those modern pests and clear his name at the same time. At least, he would feel a bit better about himself. Later, he could finish the job. And oh, to have her see him as he really was again.
He was sorely tempted to try a door. He even put his hand on the knob of the door nearest the corner. The figure must have turned in here; he couldn’t have gone farther without Bob’s having caught sight of him. At least, Bob felt almost sure of this conclusion, having attained that corner with considerable celerity, himself.
He was really tempted to try a door. He even put his hand on the knob of the door closest to the corner. The figure must have turned in here; he couldn’t have gone any further without Bob noticing him. At least, Bob felt pretty sure about this conclusion, having reached that corner pretty quickly himself.
Almost on the point of turning the knob, prudence bade Bob to pause. Suppose he made a mistake? Suppose, for example, he stumbled upon Gee-gee’s room, or Gid-up’s? The perspiration started on Bob’s brow. Gee-gee would be quite capable of hanging on to him and then raising a row, just for publicity purposes. She would make “copy” out of anything, that girl would. Then, if it wasn’t Gee-gee’s room, it might be Mrs. Van’s. Fancy his invading the privacy of that austere lady’s boudoir! Bob’s hand shook slightly and the knob rattled a trifle; he hastily released it. To his horror a voice called out.
Almost about to turn the knob, Bob hesitated out of caution. What if he made a mistake? What if he accidentally walked into Gee-gee’s room, or Gid-up’s? Sweat started to bead on Bob’s forehead. Gee-gee would definitely hold onto him and cause a scene, just for the sake of getting attention. She could turn anything into a story, that girl. And if it wasn’t Gee-gee’s room, it might be Mrs. Van’s. Just imagine him barging into that strict lady’s private space! Bob’s hand trembled slightly, causing the knob to rattle a bit; he quickly let go of it. To his shock, a voice called out.
“Any one there?”
“Is anyone there?”
It was Gee-gee. Bob stood still, not daring to stir, lest Gee-gee, with senses alert, should hear him and come out and find him. He prayed devoutly not to be “found.” It was bad enough to be crazy, and to be a social buccaneer, without having Miss Gerald look upon him as an intrigant, a Don Juan and a Jonathan Wild all rolled into one. Bob wanted to flee the worst way, but still he thought it better to contain himself and stand there like a wooden man a few moments longer.
It was Gee-gee. Bob stood frozen, not daring to move, afraid that Gee-gee, with her keen senses, would hear him and come out to find him. He fervently hoped not to be “found.” It was already tough enough being crazy and a social outlier without Miss Gerald viewing him as a schemer, a Don Juan, and a Jonathan Wild all in one. Bob felt an intense urge to escape, but he thought it was wiser to hold still and remain there like a statue for a few moments longer.
“Any one there?” repeated Gee-gee.
"Anyone there?" repeated Gee-gee.
A neighboring door opened and one of the last men Bob wanted to see, under the circumstances, looked out. It was the hammer-thrower and his honest face expressed a world of wonder, incredulity and reproach, as he beheld and recognized Bob, who didn’t know what to do, or to say. He certainly didn’t want to say anything though, having no desire to agitate Miss Gee-gee any further. Fortunately, the hammer-thrower seemed too amazed for words. He just kept looking and looking. “Where on earth did you come from?” his glance seemed to say. “Are you the ghost of Bob Bennett? And if you aren’t, what are you doing here, before a lady’s door, at this time of night?”
A nearby door opened, and one of the last people Bob wanted to see right now looked out. It was the hammer-thrower, and his honest face showed a mix of wonder, disbelief, and disappointment as he saw and recognized Bob, who didn't know what to do or say. He definitely didn’t want to say anything, not wanting to upset Miss Gee-gee any more than she already was. Thankfully, the hammer-thrower seemed too stunned to speak. He just kept staring. “Where on earth did you come from?” his expression seemed to ask. “Are you the ghost of Bob Bennett? If not, what are you doing here, in front of a lady’s door, at this time of night?”
Disapproval now became mixed with indecision in the hammer-thrower’s glance. He seemed trying to make up his mind whether or not it was a case demanding forcible measures on his part. Was it his duty to spring upon Bob, then and there, and “show him up” before the world? Bob read the thought. In another moment Gee-gee might come to the door, and then—? Bob suddenly and desperately determined to throw himself upon the mercy of the hammer-thrower. Indeed, he had no choice.
Disapproval now blended with uncertainty in the hammer-thrower’s gaze. He seemed to be trying to decide whether it was a situation that required him to take action. Should he confront Bob right then and there and expose him in front of everyone? Bob sensed his thoughts. In a moment, Gee-gee might come to the door, and then—? Bob suddenly and urgently decided to throw himself at the mercy of the hammer-thrower. He really had no choice.
Quickly he moved to the door where his hated rival stood and as quickly pushed by him and entered that person’s room. At the same moment Gee-gee unlocked her door. Bob couldn’t see her, though, as he was now thankfully swallowed up in the depths of a recess in the hammer-thrower’s room. Gee-gee peeked out. She met the eye of the hammer-thrower who had modestly withdrawn most of his person back into his apartment and who now suffered only a fraction of his face to be revealed to Gee-gee at that unseemly hour and place, and under such unseemly circumstances.
Quickly, he moved to the door where his hated rival stood and just as quickly pushed past him, entering that person's room. At the same moment, Gee-gee unlocked her door. Bob couldn’t see her, though, as he was now thankfully hidden in the depths of a recess in the hammer-thrower’s room. Gee-gee peeked out. She met the gaze of the hammer-thrower, who had modestly withdrawn most of his body back into his apartment and now allowed only a small part of his face to be seen by Gee-gee at that awkward hour and under such awkward circumstances.
“I beg your pardon,” said the hammer-thrower deferentially, and in a very low tone, “but did you call out?”
“I’m sorry,” said the hammer thrower respectfully and in a very quiet voice, “but did you say something?”
“Yes, I thought I heard some one at my door.”
“Yes, I think I heard someone at my door.”
Bob hardly breathed. Would the hammer-thrower hale him forth? Would he toss him—or try to—right out into the hall at Gee-gee’s feet?
Bob barely breathed. Would the hammer-thrower drag him out? Would he throw him—or at least try to—right into the hall at Gee-gee’s feet?
“I—I don’t see any one,” said the hammer-thrower hesitatingly, and still in a very low tone. His hesitation, however, told Bob he had considered or was still considering that forcible policy.
“I—I don’t see anyone,” said the hammer thrower hesitantly, and still in a very quiet voice. His hesitation, however, made Bob realize he had thought about or was still thinking about that forceful approach.
“I certainly thought I did hear some one,” observed Gee-gee, matching the other’s tones. His voice seemed to imply that it might be as well not to arouse any others of the household and Gee-gee involuntarily fell in with the suggestion.
“I definitely thought I heard someone,” Gee-gee said, echoing the other’s tone. His voice suggested that it might be better not to wake the rest of the household, and Gee-gee instinctively agreed with that idea.
“You—” Again, however, that awful hesitation! The hammer-thrower had no reason to like Bob, for did he not know that young gentleman had the presumption to adore Miss Gerald? Still the apparently more successful suitor for Gwendoline’s hand had a sportsmanlike instinct. He’d been brought up to be conscientious. He had been educated to be gentlemanly and considerate. Perhaps he was asking himself now if it might not be more sportsmanlike not to denounce Bob, then and there, but to give him, at least, a chance to explain? “You—you must be mistaken,” said the hammer-thrower, after a pause, in a low tense whisper.
“You—” Again, though, that awful pause! The hammer-thrower had no reason to like Bob, since he knew that young man had the audacity to admire Miss Gerald. Still, the apparently more successful contender for Gwendoline’s hand had a sportsmanlike instinct. He’d been raised to be responsible. He had been taught to be courteous and kind. Maybe he was wondering if it would be more sportsmanlike not to call out Bob right then, but to give him at least a chance to explain? “You—you must be mistaken,” said the hammer-thrower, after a pause, in a low tense whisper.
“You’re sure it wasn’t you?” murmured Gee-gee softly but suspiciously and eying the other’s open and trustworthy countenance.
“You're sure it wasn't you?” Gee-gee murmured softly but with suspicion, glancing at the other person’s open and trustworthy face.
“I?” For a moment Bob thought now, indeed, had come the time to eject him, but—“Is that a reasonable conjecture?” the other murmured back.
“I?” For a moment Bob thought that now, indeed, it was time to kick him out, but—“Is that a reasonable guess?” the other murmured back.
Gee-gee pondered. “No, it ain’t,” she confessed, at length. Locked double-doors separated her room and the hammer-thrower’s. He would surely have used a skeleton key on those doors were he the guilty party, instead of going out into the hall to try to get in that way. “I got to thinking of that swell burglar who is going the rounds, before I went to sleep,” murmured Gee-gee, “and I may have been dreaming of him! Sorry to have disturbed you.” And Gee-gee closed her door very quietly.
Gee-gee thought for a moment. “No, it’s not,” she finally admitted. Locked double doors separated her room from the hammer-thrower’s. If he was the one at fault, he would have definitely used a skeleton key on those doors instead of going out into the hallway to get in that way. “I was thinking about that awesome burglar who’s been making the rounds before I went to sleep,” Gee-gee murmured, “and I might have been dreaming about him! Sorry for waking you up.” With that, Gee-gee quietly closed her door.
She thought she must have been mistaken about the intruder. Anyhow, there wasn’t much excitement for an actress any more, in being robbed. That advertising stunt had been so overworked that even the provincial dramatic critics yawned and tossed the advance man’s little yarn of “jewels lost” right into an unsympathetic waste-basket. A scandal in high life was always more efficacious. No one ever got tired of scandals and city editors simply clamored for “more.” So Gee-gee composed herself for sleep again. She had reason to be satisfied, for had not she and Gid-up, who roomed with her, sat up late and arranged final details before retiring?
She thought she must have been wrong about the intruder. Anyway, there wasn’t much thrill for an actress anymore in getting robbed. That publicity stunt had been done to death, and even the small-town drama critics yawned and tossed the advance man’s little story of “lost jewels” right into an unsympathetic trash can. A scandal in high society was always more effective. No one ever got tired of scandals, and city editors just clamored for “more.” So Gee-gee settled down to sleep again. She had reason to be satisfied, since she and Gid-up, who shared her room, had stayed up late arranging final details before going to bed.
Gid-up would say: “We’ll make it like this.” And Gee-gee would answer: “No, like this.” Of course, Gee-gee’s way was better. Upon a slender thread of fact she fashioned, as Dickie had feared, a most wonderful edifice of fancy. She had mapped out a case that would startle even dear old New York. “Better do it good, if we’re going to do it at all,” she had said. Gid-up had been a little doubtful at first, but she always did what Gee-gee told her to in the end. And Gee-gee knew she could depend upon Gid-up’s memory, for once the latter had had a small part. She had to say: “Send for the doctor” and she had never been known to get mixed up and say: “Send for the police,” or for the undertaker, or anything equally ridiculous. Having thoroughly rehearsed her lines, she would stick to them like a major. When Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence and the two G’s should get together on the morrow, the largest anticipations of the two former ladies would be realized. Gee-gee wouldn’t have Mrs. Dan disappointed for the world. Gid-up was rather afraid of Mrs. Clarence; however, she had been batted about by so many rough stage-managers and cranky musical-directors, she could stand almost anything.
Gid-up would say, “We’ll do it like this.” And Gee-gee would reply, “No, let’s do it this way.” Naturally, Gee-gee’s idea was better. Based on a thin thread of reality, she created, as Dickie had feared, an incredible structure of imagination. She had planned a scenario that would even astonish dear old New York. “We better do it well if we’re going to do it,” she said. Gid-up had hesitated at first, but she always ended up doing what Gee-gee instructed her to. And Gee-gee knew she could rely on Gid-up’s memory, since she once had a small role. She had to say, “Send for the doctor,” and she had never mixed it up to say, “Send for the police,” or the undertaker, or anything equally absurd. After fully rehearsing her lines, she would stick to them like a pro. When Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence and the two G’s met the next day, the greatest expectations of the first two ladies would be fulfilled. Gee-gee wouldn’t let Mrs. Dan down for anything. Gid-up was a bit intimidated by Mrs. Clarence; however, after being pushed around by so many tough stage managers and difficult music directors, she could handle nearly anything.
But what about Bob?
But what about Bob?
That young gentleman, now seated in the hammer-thrower’s room, had frankly revealed what had happened to bring him out in the hall. In a low tone he told why he had approached Gee-gee’s door and what had been in his mind when he had placed his hand on the knob. The hammer-thrower, if not appearing particularly impressed by Bob’s story, listened gravely; occasionally he shook his head. It wasn’t, on the whole, a very reasonable-sounding yarn. Truth certainly sounded stranger than fiction in this instance. Bob couldn’t very well blame the other for not believing. Still he (Bob) owed him that explanation. Though he (Bob) might detest him as the man who would probably rob him of Miss Gerald’s hand, still the fact remained that the hammer-thrower appeared at present in the guise of his (Bob’s) savior. Bob couldn’t get away from this unpleasant conclusion. He didn’t want to have anything to do with the other and yet here he was in his room, actually being shielded by him. The situation was, indeed, well-nigh intolerable.
That young man, now sitting in the hammer-thrower’s room, had openly shared what had led him to the hallway. In a quiet voice, he explained why he had gone to Gee-gee’s door and what he had been thinking when he put his hand on the doorknob. The hammer-thrower, while not looking particularly impressed by Bob’s story, listened seriously; occasionally he shook his head. Overall, it wasn’t a very believable tale. In this case, the truth definitely seemed stranger than fiction. Bob couldn't really blame the guy for not believing him. Still, he owed him that explanation. Even though he might dislike him as the guy who was likely to take Miss Gerald's hand, the reality was that the hammer-thrower currently appeared to be his savior. Bob couldn’t escape this uncomfortable realization. He didn’t want anything to do with the guy, and yet here he was in his room, actually being protected by him. The situation was, indeed, almost unbearable.
The hammer-thrower studied Bob with quiet earnest eyes, and the latter had to acknowledge to himself that the man’s face was strong and capable. If Miss Gerald married him—as seemed not unlikely—she would, at any rate, not get a weak man. He was about as big as Bob, though not so reckless-looking. Bob was handsomer, in his dashing way, but some girls, sensibly inclined, would prefer what might appear a more reliable type. The hammer-thrower looked so sure of himself and his ground he inspired confidence. He looked too sure of his ground now, as regards Bob.
The hammer-thrower studied Bob with serious, focused eyes, and Bob had to admit to himself that the man’s face was strong and capable. If Miss Gerald married him—as seemed likely—she definitely wouldn’t be getting a weak man. He was about Bob's size, though not as reckless in appearance. Bob was better-looking, in his bold way, but some girls, being practical, might prefer what seemed like a more dependable type. The hammer-thrower looked so confident in himself and his position that he inspired trust. Right now, though, he looked a little too confident when it came to Bob.
“It won’t do,” he said with his usual directness to Bob, when the latter had finished explaining. “Sounds a little fishy! I’m sorry, old chap, but I shall have to have time to think it all over. And then I’ll try to decide what is best to be done. You say you were unjustly incarcerated in a private sanatorium.” Bob hadn’t explained the circumstances—who had “incarcerated” him and why. “That you were incarcerated at all is a matter of regret.”
“It’s not going to work,” he said bluntly to Bob when he finished explaining. “It sounds a bit suspicious! I’m sorry, my friend, but I need some time to think it over. After that, I’ll try to figure out what’s best to do. You mentioned you were unfairly locked up in a private sanatorium.” Bob hadn’t gone into the details—who had locked him up and why. “The fact that you were locked up at all is unfortunate.”
“To you?” said Bob cynically.
"To you?" Bob said sarcastically.
“Of course.” Firmly, but with faint surprise. “You didn’t think I rejoiced at your misfortune, did you?”
“Of course.” Firmly, but with a hint of surprise. “You didn’t think I was happy about your misfortune, did you?”
“I didn’t know. I thought it possible.”
“I didn’t know. I thought it was possible.”
The hammer-thrower’s heavy brows drew together. “You seem to have a little misconception of my character,” he observed with a trace of formality. “You were incarcerated, apparently, pro bono publico. I had no hand in it. If I had been consulted, I should have hesitated some time before expressing an opinion.”
The hammer thrower furrowed his heavy brows. “It seems you have a bit of a misunderstanding about who I am,” he said with a hint of formality. “You were locked up, apparently, for the public good. I had nothing to do with it. If I had been asked, I would have taken some time to think before sharing my opinion.”
“Thanks,” said Bob curtly. Such generous reserve was rather galling, coming from this quarter.
“Thanks,” Bob said tersely. That kind of generous restraint was pretty irritating, coming from him.
“I’m afraid you don’t mean that,” replied the other. “And it’s a bad habit to say what you don’t mean. However, we are drifting from the subject. You will pardon me for not swallowing, a capite ad calcem, that little Münchhausen explanation of yours.”
“I’m afraid you don’t really mean that,” replied the other. “And it’s not good to say what you don’t mean. However, we are getting off topic. Please excuse me for not accepting, a capite ad calcem, that little Münchhausen explanation of yours.”
“I don’t care whether you swallow it head, neck and breeches, or not,” returned Bob. The other had taken a classical course at college, and Bob conceived he was ponderously trying to show off, just to be annoying. He was adopting a doubly irritating and classical manner of calling Bob a liar. And that young man was not accustomed to being called that—at least, of yore! Maybe he would have to stand it now. It seemed so. “You’re like a good many other people I’ve met lately,” said Bob, not without a touch of weariness as well as bitterness. “You don’t know the truth when you hear it.”
“I don’t care if you swallow it whole or not,” Bob replied. The other guy had studied classics in college, and Bob felt like he was just trying to show off to be annoying. He was using an irritating, pretentious way of calling Bob a liar. And Bob wasn’t used to being called that—at least, not before! Maybe he’d have to deal with it now. It seemed that way. “You’re like a lot of other people I’ve met lately,” Bob said, with a hint of weariness and bitterness. “You don’t recognize the truth when you hear it.”
The hammer-thrower drew up his heavy shoulders. “No use abusing me, old chap,” he said in even well-poised tones. “Am I at fault for your unpopularity? Indeed”—as if arguing with himself in his slow heavy fashion—“I fail to understand why you have made yourself unpopular. You seem to have proceeded with deliberate intention. However, that is irrelevant. You say there was some one in your room, or rather the room you were supposed to have vacated; but to which you have unaccountably returned—not, I imagine, by way of the front door.” Severely. “And after entering in burglarious fashion you pursued a phantom. The phantom vanished, leaving you in a compromising position. You expect people to believe that?” Shaking his head.
The hammer-thrower pulled back his broad shoulders. “There’s no point in taking it out on me, my friend,” he said in calm, measured tones. “Am I responsible for your unpopularity? Honestly”—as if debating with himself slowly—“I don't get why you’ve made yourself unpopular. It seems like you acted with intention. But that’s beside the point. You claim there was someone in your room, or rather the one you were supposed to have left; yet you’ve inexplicably returned—not, I assume, through the front door.” He spoke sternly. “And after sneaking in, you chased after a ghost. The ghost disappeared, leaving you in a tricky situation. Do you really expect people to buy that?” He shook his head.
“I should be surprised if they did,” answered Bob gloomily. “I suppose you’ll tell everybody to-morrow.”
“I would be shocked if they did,” Bob replied gloomily. “I guess you’ll tell everyone tomorrow.”
“That’s the question,” said the other seriously. “What is my duty in the matter? I don’t want to do you an irreparable injury, yet appearances certainly seem to indicate that you—” He hesitated.
“That’s the question,” said the other seriously. “What’s my responsibility in this situation? I don’t want to cause you any lasting harm, yet it definitely seems like you—” He hesitated.
“Never mind the Latin for it,” said Bob. “Plain Anglo-Saxon will do. Call me a thief.”
“Forget the Latin for it,” said Bob. “Plain English will work. Just call me a thief.”
“It’s an ugly word,” said the other reluctantly, “and—well, I don’t wish to be hasty. My father always told me to help a man whenever I could; not to shove him down. And maybe—” He paused. There was really a nice expression on his strong face.
“It’s a nasty word,” said the other hesitantly, “and—well, I don’t want to jump to conclusions. My dad always told me to help someone whenever I could; not to push him down. And maybe—” He paused. There was definitely a nice look on his strong face.
“Oh, you think I may be only a young offender—a juvenile in crime?” exclaimed Bob bitterly.
“Oh, you think I might just be a young offender—a teenager in crime?” Bob exclaimed bitterly.
“The words are your own,” observed the other. “To tell you the truth,” seriously, “I hardly know what to think. It is all too extraordinary—too unexpected. I’ll have to ponder on it. The profs, at college always said I had the champion slow brain. The peculiar part to me is,” that puzzled look returning to his heavy features, “I can’t understand why you’re making people think what they do of you? Frankly, I don’t believe you’re ‘dippy.’ You were always rather—just what is the word?—‘mercurial’—yes; that will do. But your head looks right enough to me.”
“The words are your own,” the other person noted. “To be honest,” he said seriously, “I can hardly wrap my head around this. It’s all so strange—so unexpected. I need to think about it. The professors in college always said I had the slowest brain. What’s really confusing to me is,” that puzzled look coming back to his heavy features, “I can't figure out why you’re making people think what they do about you. Honestly, I don’t believe you’re ‘crazy.’ You’ve always been a bit—what’s the word?—‘mercurial’—yes; that works. But to me, you seem perfectly sane.”
“What’s the Latin for ‘Thank you’?” said Bob.
“What’s the Latin for ‘Thank you’?” Bob asked.
“Do you really think this is a trivial matter?” asked the other, bending a stronger glance upon his visitor. “I believe you are somewhat obligated to me. Please bear that in mind.” With quiet dignity. “As I was saying, your conduct since coming here, seems to baffle explanation—that is, the right one. I wonder what is your ‘lay,’ anyhow? What’s the idea? I like to be able to grasp people.” Forcefully. “And you escape me. I can’t get at the tangible in you. Nor”—with a sudden quick glance—“can Miss Gerald—”
“Do you really think this is a minor issue?” asked the other, giving his visitor a more intense look. “I think you owe me a bit of consideration. Keep that in mind.” With quiet dignity. “As I was saying, your behavior since you arrived here seems hard to explain—that is, the correct way. I'm curious about your ‘angle,’ anyway. What’s the idea? I like to understand people.” Forcefully. “And you’re just slipping away from me. I can’t find the concrete side of you. Nor”—with a quick glance—“can Miss Gerald—”
“Suppose we leave her name out,” said Bob sharply. “You’ve done me a favor which I ought not to have accepted. And I tell you frankly I’d rather have accepted it from any one else in the world.”
“Let’s leave her name out,” Bob said sharply. “You’ve done me a favor that I shouldn’t have accepted. Honestly, I’d rather have accepted it from anyone else in the world.”
“I think I understand,” replied the other quietly, with no show of resentment on his heavy features. “Have a cigar?” Indicating a box on the table.
“I think I get it,” replied the other quietly, with no signs of resentment on his strong features. “Care for a cigar?” He pointed to a box on the table.
“I’d rather not.”
“Not interested.”
“Very well!”
"Sounds good!"
For some moments Bob sat in moody silence. Then suddenly he got up.
For a few moments, Bob sat in silence, lost in thought. Then, all of a sudden, he stood up.
“Am I to be permitted to return to my room?” he asked.
“Can I go back to my room?” he asked.
“I believe I told you I would consider your case,” said the hammer-thrower.
“I think I mentioned that I would think about your situation,” said the hammer-thrower.
And Bob passed out. He regained his room without mishap, which rather surprised him. He almost expected to be intercepted by the monocle-man but nothing of the kind happened.
And Bob passed out. He made it back to his room without any problems, which surprised him a bit. He almost thought he would be stopped by the guy with the monocle, but that didn’t happen.
CHAPTER XVI—PLAYING WITH BOB
It took a great deal of courage for Bob to go down to breakfast the next morning. In fact, he had never done anything before in his life that demanded so much courage. He pictured his entrance, anticipating what would happen; he didn’t try to deceive himself. The monocle-man would tap him on the shoulder. “You are my prisoner,” he would say. And then it would be “exit” for Bob amid the exclamations and in the face of the accumulated staring of the company.
It took a lot of courage for Bob to go down to breakfast the next morning. In fact, he had never done anything in his life that required so much bravery. He imagined how he would walk in, knowing what would happen; he didn't try to kid himself. The monocle guy would tap him on the shoulder. “You’re my prisoner,” he would say. And then it would be “exit” for Bob while everyone gasped and stared at him.
Bob wasn’t going to play the craven now, though, so he marched down-stairs and into the breakfast-room, his head well up. With that smile on his lips and the frosty light in his blue eyes, he looked not unlike a young Viking fearlessly presenting a bold brow to the enemy while his ship is sinking beneath him. He acted just as if he hadn’t been away and as if nothing had happened.
Bob wasn’t going to act timid now, though, so he marched downstairs and into the breakfast room, his head held high. With that smile on his lips and a glint in his blue eyes, he resembled a young Viking bravely facing the enemy while his ship sank beneath him. He carried himself as if he hadn’t been away and as if nothing had happened.
“Good-morning, people,” he said in his cheeriest.
“Good morning, everyone,” he said in his happiest tone.
For a moment there was a tombstone silence while Bob, not seeming to notice it, dropped down in a convenient place at the table. His vis-a-vis, as luck, or ill-luck would have it, was the monocle-man. Bob felt the shivers stealing over him. But the monocle-man, too, acted as if nothing had happened. He didn’t get up and tap Bob on the shoulder. Perhaps he wished to finish his breakfast first.
For a moment, there was a heavy silence as Bob, seemingly unaware, plopped down in a convenient spot at the table. By chance, or perhaps bad luck, he was facing the monocle man. Bob felt a chill run down his spine. But the monocle man also acted like nothing was going on. He didn’t stand up and tap Bob on the shoulder. Maybe he wanted to finish his breakfast first.
“Aw!—Have some toast,” he observed to Bob. “Mrs. Ralston’s toast is really delicious.”
“Aw!—Have some toast,” he said to Bob. “Mrs. Ralston’s toast is really delicious.”
“No,” said Bob airily. “I don’t like that English kind of toast. Makes me think of rusk! No taste to it! Give me good old American toast with plenty of butter on it.”
“No,” Bob said casually. “I’m not a fan of that English toast. It reminds me of rusk! No flavor at all! I prefer good old American toast with lots of butter on it.”
“Aw!” said the monocle-man.
“Wow!” said the monocle-man.
Bob didn’t stop there. He appealed to the bishop and carried the discussion on to the doctor. He even went so far, a daredevil look in his sanguine blue eyes now, as to ask Miss Gerald’s opinion. Miss Gerald, however, pretended not to hear. Her devoted admirer was close at hand and Bob saw the hammer-thrower’s brows knit at sight of him. Bob in his new mood didn’t care a straw now and looked straight back at the hammer-thrower, as if daring him to do his worst. For an instant he thought the hammer-thrower was going to say something, but he didn’t. Perhaps second thought told him it would be better taste to wait, for he lifted his heavy shoulders with rather a contemptuous or pitying shrug and paid no further attention to luckless Bob.
Bob didn’t stop there. He reached out to the bishop and continued the conversation with the doctor. He even took the risk, a daring look in his bright blue eyes now, of asking Miss Gerald what she thought. Miss Gerald, however, acted like she didn’t hear him. Her devoted admirer was nearby, and Bob noticed the hammer-thrower frown when he saw him. Bob, in his bold mood, didn’t care at all and looked straight back at the hammer-thrower, as if challenging him to do his worst. For a moment, he thought the hammer-thrower was about to say something, but he didn’t. Maybe he realized it would be better to hold back, as he lifted his heavy shoulders with a kind of contemptuous or pitying shrug and ignored poor Bob from then on.
The latter kept up a gay conversation between bites, professing to be quite unaware of a certain extraordinary reticence with which his light persiflage was received. He looked around to see if Gee-gee and Gid-up were anywhere visible and saw that they were not. This did not surprise him, as theatrical ladies are usually late risers and like to breakfast in their rooms; nor would they be apt to mingle promiscuously with the other guests. Mrs. Ralston, Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence were also not about. Bob was thankful Mrs. Ralston needed most of the morning by herself, or with sundry experts, to beautify; he didn’t care to see his hostess just yet. It was hard enough to meet her fair niece, Miss Gerald, under the circumstances.
The latter kept up a cheerful conversation between bites, acting completely unaware of the unusual silence surrounding his light chatter. He looked around to see if Gee-gee and Gid-up were anywhere in sight and noticed they were not. This didn’t surprise him, as theater dames usually sleep in and prefer to have breakfast in their rooms; they weren't likely to mix casually with the other guests. Mrs. Ralston, Mrs. Dan, and Mrs. Clarence were also missing. Bob was relieved that Mrs. Ralston needed most of the morning to herself, or with various experts, to get ready; he wasn't in the mood to see his hostess just yet. It was challenging enough to meet her lovely niece, Miss Gerald, given the situation.
“I understand we have two new arrivals in the professional entertaining line,” said Bob to the monocle-man.
“I hear we have two new additions to the entertainment scene,” Bob said to the man with the monocle.
“Aw!—how interesting!” replied the other. Bob couldn’t get much of a “rise” out of him, though unvaryingly affable in his manner toward the young man. “Try some of this marmalade—do—it’s Scotch, you know. All marmalade ought to be Scotch. Dislike intensely the English make!”
“Wow! How interesting!” replied the other. Bob couldn’t get much of a reaction from him, though he was always friendly toward the young man. “Try some of this marmalade—go ahead, it’s Scotch, you know. All marmalade should be Scotch. I really dislike the kind the English make!”
“How unpatriotic!” said Bob cynically. Really, the monocle-man did it very well. He was a fine imitation.
“How unpatriotic!” Bob said with a smirk. Honestly, the guy with the monocle did a great job. He was a convincing imitation.
“Aw!” he said once more.
“Wow!” he said again.
And then Bob began to play with him. Dear old dad who was somewhat of a bibliomaniac had, on one or two of Bob’s vacation trips to London, introduced the lad to many quaint, out-of-the-way nooks and corners. Now Bob drew on the source of information thus gleaned and angled with his one-eye-glassed neighbor. But the monocle-man fenced beautifully; he knew more than Bob. And when the latter had exhausted himself, the monocle-man, with a few twinkles behind his staring window-pane, played with Bob. He showed him as a mere child for ignorance of the subject, and drawled so brilliantly that some of the others became interested, though professing not to see that Bob was there. When the monocle-man had finished, Bob felt abashed. He gazed upon the other with new and wondrous respect. He had attempted the infantile and amateurish game of unmasking the other—of exhibiting his crass ignorance and letting the others draw their own conclusions—and he had been literally overwhelmed in his efforts.
And then Bob started to play with him. Good old dad, who had a bit of a book obsession, had, during one or two of Bob’s trips to London, shown him many charming, hidden spots. Now Bob tapped into that knowledge and tried to engage his neighbor, who wore a monocle. But the monocle guy was really good at talking; he knew a lot more than Bob. When Bob had run out of steam, the monocle guy, with a few twinkles behind his glass, started to play with Bob instead. He made Bob look like a complete novice due to his lack of knowledge on the topic, and his explanations were so captivating that some others became interested, although they pretended not to notice Bob was there. When the monocle guy finished, Bob felt embarrassed. He looked at him with newfound respect. He had tried the childish and amateurish tactic of exposing the other person’s ignorance—of showcasing his own naivety and letting others draw their conclusions—and he felt completely overwhelmed by the experience.
Having shown Bob the futility of trying to play with him, the monocle-man again offered Bob the marmalade. His manner of doing it made Bob think of a jailer who believed in the humane treatment of prisoners and who liked to see them well-fed. Bob for the second time refused the marmalade and did it most emphatically. Whereupon the monocle-man smiled.
Having demonstrated to Bob how pointless it was to try and play with him, the man with the monocle once more offered Bob the marmalade. The way he did it reminded Bob of a jailer who believed in treating prisoners humanely and enjoyed seeing them well-fed. For the second time, Bob firmly declined the marmalade. At that, the man with the monocle smiled.
At that moment Bob met the gaze of the temperamental young thing. There were dark rings under her eyes and she looked paler than he had ever seen her. Also, there was a certain fascinated wonder, not unmixed with some deeper feeling, in her expression. She was, no doubt, absolutely astounded to see Bob there, and talking with the monocle-man. Bob surmised she would be waiting for him somewhere later to express herself, and he was not mistaken. Bob got up. As he did so, he glanced at the monocle-man. Would he be permitted to go, or would the denouement now happen? Would the other, alas, arise?
At that moment, Bob locked eyes with the moody young woman. There were dark circles under her eyes, and she looked paler than he had ever seen her. There was a mix of fascinated wonder, blended with deeper emotions, in her expression. She was clearly shocked to see Bob there, talking to the guy with the monocle. Bob figured she would find him later to share her thoughts, and he was right. Bob stood up. As he did, he glanced at the monocle man. Would he be allowed to leave, or was the climax about to unfold? Would the other, unfortunately, get up?
He did nothing of the kind. He let Bob have a little more line. He even suffered him to walk away, at the same time smiling once more at vacancy or the rack of toast. Of course the temperamental young thing hailed Bob shortly after he was out of the room. He expected that. She came hurrying up to him, excitement and terror in her eyes.
He didn't do anything like that. He let Bob have a little more slack. He even allowed him to walk away, all while smiling again at nothing or the toaster. Naturally, the dramatic young woman called out to Bob shortly after he left the room. He saw that coming. She rushed over to him, a mix of excitement and fear in her eyes.
“Flee!” she whispered.
"Run!" she whispered.
“I won’t do it,” answered Bob sturdily.
“I’m not going to do it,” Bob replied firmly.
“Why did you come back?” Agitatedly, “What a rash thing to do! Like walking into the lions’ den.”
“Why did you come back?” he asked, agitated. “What a reckless thing to do! It’s like walking into a lion’s den.”
“Well, the principal lion was nice and polite, anyhow.”
“Well, the main lion was nice and polite, anyway.”
“Could you not see he was only just”—she sought for a word—“dallying with you?”
“Can’t you see he was just”—she searched for a word—“messing around with you?”
“He made me see that,” Bob confessed rather gloomily. “He made me feel like thirty cents. I guess he’s got my goat. And to think I thought him a blamed fool. I tell you I’m learning something these days; I’m taking a course they don’t have in college, all right.”
“He made me see that,” Bob confessed rather gloomily. “He made me feel worthless. I guess he’s got my number. And to think I thought he was an idiot. I tell you I’m learning something these days; I’m taking a course they don’t have in college, for sure.”
“Why do you waste time talking?” said the girl. “Every moment is precious. Go, or you are lost.”
“Why are you wasting time talking?” said the girl. “Every moment is valuable. Go, or you’ll be lost.”
“That sounds like the stage,” replied Bob.
"That sounds like the stage," Bob responded.
She came closer, her temperamental gaze burning. “Will this make you serious?” she asked almost fiercely. “I told.”
She stepped closer, her intense gaze blazing. “Will this make you take it seriously?” she asked nearly fiercely. “I told you.”
“Eh?”
"Wait, what?"
“I told all,” she repeated.
"I spilled everything," she repeated.
“You did?”
“Seriously?”
“Yes.”
"Yep."
“When?”
“When?”
“Last night.”
"Last night."
“Hum!” said Bob. “That makes it a little worse, that is all.”
“Hum!” said Bob. “That makes it a bit worse, that’s all.”
“I was mad,” she said, “at the way you—you—”
“I was so angry,” she said, “at the way you—you—”
“I think I understand.”
"I think I get it."
“Why—why don’t you get angry and—”
“Why—why don’t you get mad and—”
“And curse you the way they do in plays?” He laughed a little mirthlessly. “What’s the use? It wouldn’t do any good if I dragged you around by the hair.”
“And curse you like they do in plays?” He laughed a bit without joy. “What’s the point? It wouldn’t help if I pulled you around by the hair.”
“It’s just that attitude of yours,” she said, breathing hard, “that has made me perfectly furious.”
“It’s just that attitude of yours,” she said, breathing heavily, “that has made me really angry.”
“Who’d you tell?” Bob eyed her contemplatively.
“Who did you tell?” Bob looked at her thoughtfully.
“Lord Stan—The monocle-man, as you call him.”
“Lord Stan—the monocle guy, as you call him.”
“Whew!” Bob whistled. “You went straight to headquarters, didn’t you?”
“Wow!” Bob whistled. “You went right to headquarters, didn’t you?”
“He came up to me on the porch just after you had left, and—and—”
“He walked up to me on the porch right after you had left, and—and—”
“It’s quite plain,” said Bob gently. “You couldn’t hold in. Don’t know as I ought to blame you much.”
“It’s pretty obvious,” Bob said gently. “You couldn’t keep it in. I don’t think I should blame you too much.”
“I wish you wouldn’t act like that,” she returned passionately. “Don’t you hate me?”
“I wish you wouldn’t act like that,” she replied passionately. “Don’t you hate me?”
He looked at her from his superior height. “No. Now that I think of it, you only did the right and moral thing. After all”—he seemed to be speaking from the hammer-thrower’s high judicial plane—“it was your duty to tell.”
He looked down at her from his taller position. “No. Now that I think about it, you only did the right and ethical thing. After all”—he seemed to be speaking from a place of high authority—“it was your responsibility to tell.”
“Duty!” she shot back at him. “I didn’t do it for that, or”—with sudden scorn—“because it was the moral thing. I did it because—because you—you had hurt me and—and I wanted to hurt you the worst way—the very worst way I could—”
“Duty!” she fired back at him. “I didn’t do it for that, or”—with sudden contempt—“because it was the right thing to do. I did it because—because you—you hurt me and—and I wanted to hurt you in the worst way possible—the absolute worst way I could—”
“Well, that sounds very human,” replied Bob soothingly. “It’s the old law. Eye for an eye! Tit for tat! Quid pro quo!” That hammer-thrower was getting him into the Latin habit.
“Well, that sounds very human,” replied Bob soothingly. “It’s the old law. Eye for an eye! Tit for tat! Quid pro quo!” That hammer-thrower was getting him into the Latin habit.
“You must not speak like that. You must hate me—despise me—I betrayed you—betrayed—”
“You shouldn't speak like that. You must hate me—look down on me—I betrayed you—betrayed—”
Bob looked at her sympathetically. She really was suffering. “Oh, no, you didn’t. You only thought you did,” he said.
Bob looked at her with compassion. She was clearly in pain. “Oh, no, you didn’t. You just thought you did,” he said.
“I did! I did! And afterward I felt like Salome with the head of John the Baptist.”
“I did! I did! And after that, I felt like Salome with the head of John the Baptist.”
Bob twisted his handsome head and lifted a hand to his neck. “Well, it’s really not so bad as that,” he returned in a tone intended to be consoling. “Anyhow, it’s very brave of you to come and tell me about it.”
Bob turned his handsome head and raised a hand to his neck. “Well, it’s really not as bad as that,” he replied in a tone meant to be comforting. “Anyway, it’s very brave of you to come and tell me about it.”
“Brave!” she scoffed, the temperamental breast rising. “Why, I just blurted it all right out—how I discovered you in my room—how I turned on the light and how you dropped the brooch to the floor!”
“Brave!” she mocked, her temper flaring. “I just said it all—how I found you in my room—how I switched on the light and how you dropped the brooch on the floor!”
For a few moments both were silent. Then Bob spoke: “How’d it be, if we called bygones, bygones, and just be friends?” he said gravely. “Honestly, I believe I could like you an awful lot as a friend.”
For a few moments, both were silent. Then Bob spoke: “What if we put the past behind us and just be friends?” he said seriously. “Honestly, I think I could really like you a lot as a friend.”
“Don’t!” she said hoarsely. “Or—or I can’t hold in. My! but you are good.”
“Don’t!” she said hoarsely. “Or—or I can’t hold it in. Wow, you’re really amazing.”
“Isn’t that the sound of music?” said Bob suddenly.
“Isn’t that the sound of music?” Bob said suddenly.
“I—I believe it is.”
“I think it is.”
“A tango, by jove! Think of tangoing right after breakfast! Some one is beginning early. What are we coming to in these degenerate days?” Bob wanted to take her thoughts off that other disagreeable subject. His own sudden and unexpected appearance had, no doubt, been quite upsetting to those other guests. That tango music had a wild irresponsible sound, as if the some one who was banging the concert-grand in the big music salon was endeavoring to turn the general trend of fancy into more symphonious channels. He, or she, was a musical good Samaritan. Bob held out a ceremonious arm to the temperamental young thing. “Shall we?” he said. “Why not?”
“A tango, wow! Can you imagine tangoing right after breakfast? Someone is starting early. What are we coming to in these crazy days?” Bob wanted to distract her from that other unpleasant topic. His sudden and unexpected arrival had probably been quite startling for those other guests. That tango music had a wild, carefree vibe, as if the person playing the grand piano in the big music room was trying to steer the overall mood into more harmonious territory. He or she was a musical good Samaritan. Bob extended a formal arm to the dramatic young woman. “Shall we?” he asked. “Why not?”
“You mean—?”
"You mean—?"
“Tango with me? That is, if you are not above tangoing with a—”
“Tango with me? That is, if you’re okay with dancing with a—”
She slipped an uncertain little hand on his arm.
She placed a hesitant little hand on his arm.
“It may be my last, for a long time,” he said gaily. “While we live, let us live.”
“It might be my last one for a while,” he said cheerfully. “As long as we’re alive, let’s really live.”
But when they entered they saw it was the man with the monocle who sat at the big, wonderfully carved piano. His fingers were fairly flying; his face was a bit more twisted up to keep the monocle from falling off, while he was flinging his hands about over the keys. At sight of him, the temperamental little thing breathed quickly and would have drawn back, but Bob drew her forward. The monocle-man’s face did not change as he glanced over his shoulder to regard them; he had a faculty for hitting the right keys without looking. Bob put a big reassuring arm about a slim waist. He tangoed only to show the temperamental little thing that he forgave her. But her feet were not so light as ordinarily and the dance rather dragged. Once Bob looked down; why, she wasn’t much bigger than a child.
But when they walked in, they saw it was the guy with the monocle sitting at the large, beautifully carved piano. His fingers were flying over the keys, and he was slightly contorting his face to keep the monocle from falling off as he moved his hands around. At the sight of him, the sensitive little thing gasped and would have pulled back, but Bob pulled her forward. The monocle guy didn’t change his expression as he glanced back at them; he had a talent for hitting the right keys without looking. Bob wrapped a reassuring arm around her slim waist. He danced the tango just to show the sensitive little thing that he forgave her. But her feet weren’t as light as usual, so the dance felt a bit slow. Once, Bob looked down and realized she wasn’t much bigger than a child.
“Friends?” he asked.
"Friends?" he asked.
Her little hand clutched tighter for answer, and the monocle-man played more madly. It was as if he were making the puppets fly around while he pulled the strings. He seemed having the best kind of a time. There was now a whimsical look in his eyes as they followed Bob.
Her small hand gripped tighter, wanting an answer, and the man with the monocle played even more wildly. It was like he was making the puppets swirl around while he pulled the strings. He looked like he was having an amazing time. There was now a playful expression in his eyes as they followed Bob.
That was one of the longest days Bob ever knew. The temperamental thing had told him they were coming to arrest him. Well, why didn’t they? His appearing unexpectedly on the spot like that may have caused them to change their minds. He included in the “them” Mrs. Ralston and her niece and he could only conclude they all meant to “dally” with him, in Miss Dolly’s phraseology, a little longer. But surely they had enough evidence to go right ahead and let justice (?) take its course. What the temperamental little thing had confessed would be quite sufficient in itself, for their purpose.
That was one of the longest days Bob ever experienced. The moody person had told him they were coming to arrest him. So, why didn’t they? His unexpected appearance may have made them rethink their plans. He included Mrs. Ralston and her niece in the “they,” and he could only conclude they all meant to “play around” with him, in Miss Dolly’s words, a little longer. But surely they had enough evidence to just go ahead and let justice (?) take its course. What the moody little person had confessed would be more than enough for their purposes.
Bob began to get impatient; he didn’t like being “dallied” with. In his desperate mood, he desired to meet the issue at once and since “it” was bound to happen, he wanted it to happen right off. Then he would robustly proclaim his innocence—aye, and fight for it with all his might. He was in a fighting mood.
Bob started to get impatient; he didn’t like being “dallied” with. In his desperate state, he wanted to face the issue immediately, and since “it” was bound to happen, he wanted it to happen right away. Then he would boldly declare his innocence—yeah, and fight for it with all his strength. He was ready for a fight.
Mrs. Ralston’s demeanor toward him—when in the natural order of events he was obliged to meet that lady—added to his feeling of utter helplessness. She, like the monocle-man, acted as if nothing had happened, seeming to see nothing extraordinary or surprising in his being there. She treated him just as if he hadn’t been away and talked in the most natural manner about the weather or other commonplace topics. She was graciousness itself, even demanding playfully if he hadn’t thought of any more French compliments?
Mrs. Ralston's attitude towards him—when he naturally had to meet her—made him feel completely helpless. She, like the guy with the monocle, acted as if nothing had happened, seeming to find nothing strange or unexpected about his presence. She treated him as if he hadn’t been gone at all and chatted casually about the weather or other mundane subjects. She was the picture of graciousness, even playfully asking if he hadn’t thought of any more French compliments.
Bob stammered he had not. The fact that Miss Gerald was near and overheard all they said didn’t add to his mental composure. Gwendoline’s violet eyes had such a peculiar look. Bob hoped and prayed she would preserve that manner of cold and haughty aloofness. He wouldn’t have exchanged a word with her now for all the world, if he had had any choice in the matter. Did she divine his inward shrinking from any further talk with her? Did she realize she was the one especial person Bob didn’t want to converse with, under the circumstances? It may be she did so realize; also, that she deliberately sought to add to his discomfiture. Possibly, she felt no punishment could be too great for one who had sunk so low as he had.
Bob stammered that he hadn’t. The fact that Miss Gerald was nearby and overheard everything they said didn’t help his mental state. Gwendoline’s violet eyes had such a strange look. Bob hoped and prayed she would keep that cold and haughty distance. He wouldn’t have exchanged a word with her now for anything in the world, if he had any say in it. Did she sense his desire to avoid any more conversation with her? Did she realize she was the one person Bob absolutely didn’t want to talk to, given the circumstances? Maybe she did realize it; perhaps she intentionally sought to make him uncomfortable. Perhaps she thought no punishment would be too severe for someone who had fallen as low as he had.
At any rate, the day was yet young when, like a proud princess, she stood suddenly before him. Bob had taken refuge in that summer-house where she had proposed (ha! ha!) to him. He had been noting that Mrs. Ralston seemed to have several new gardeners working for her and it had flashed across his mind that these gardeners were of the monocle-man type. They were imitation gardeners. One kept a furtive eye on Bob. He was under surveillance. Now he could understand why the monocle-man let him flutter this way and that, with seeming unconcern. Oh, he was being dallied with, sure enough! That monocle-man was argus-eyed. Bob had had a sample of his cleverness at the breakfast-table.
At any rate, the day was still young when, like a confident princess, she suddenly stood before him. Bob had sought shelter in that summer-house where she had jokingly proposed to him. He had noticed that Mrs. Ralston seemed to have several new gardeners working for her, and it occurred to him that these gardeners were the monocle-man type. They were fake gardeners. One of them kept a sneaky eye on Bob. He was being watched. Now he could see why the monocle-man allowed him to flit around like this, pretending to be unconcerned. Oh, he was definitely being toyed with! That monocle-man had eyes everywhere. Bob had already experienced a taste of his cleverness at the breakfast table.
Miss Gerald’s shadow fell abruptly at Bob’s feet. He saw it before he saw her—a radiant, accusing patrician presence. The girl carried a golf stick, but there was no caddy in sight.
Miss Gerald’s shadow suddenly appeared at Bob’s feet. He noticed it before he noticed her—a striking, judgmental figure. The girl had a golf club, but there was no caddy around.
“Mr. Bennett,” said Miss Gerald, with customary directness, “do you know who poisoned my aunt’s dog?”
“Mr. Bennett,” said Miss Gerald, with her usual straightforwardness, “do you know who poisoned my aunt’s dog?”
Bob scrambled to his feet awkwardly. Her loveliness alone was enough to embarrass him. “No,” he said.
Bob awkwardly got to his feet. Just her beauty was enough to make him feel embarrassed. “No,” he said.
“He was poisoned that night you left,” she said, and went on studying him.
“He was poisoned that night you left,” she said, continuing to examine him.
Bob pondered heavily. If the dog had been killed with a golf stick for example, he might have been to blame. “You are sure he was poisoned?” he asked with an effort.
Bob thought hard. If the dog had been killed with a golf club, for instance, he might have been responsible. “Are you sure he was poisoned?” he asked, straining to get the words out.
“Certainly.” In surprise.
"Of course." In surprise.
“Well, I didn’t do it,” said Bob.
“Well, I didn’t do it,” Bob said.
“Were you in any way responsible for it?” She stood like an angel of the flaming sword in the doorway, where the sunlight framed her figure. She rather intoxicated poor Bob.
“Were you in any way responsible for it?” She stood like an angel with a flaming sword in the doorway, the sunlight framing her figure. She kind of overwhelmed poor Bob.
“Not to my knowledge,” he said. Of course the commodore might have poisoned the dog, but it was unlikely. Probably that inside-operator, or his outside pal had “done the deed.” A dog would be in their way.
“Not that I know of,” he said. Of course, the commodore might have poisoned the dog, but it was unlikely. It was probably that inside guy, or his outside buddy who had “done the deed.” A dog would be a problem for them.
Miss Gerald considered. “There is another question I should like to ask you, Mr. Bennett,” she said presently.
Miss Gerald thought for a moment. “There's another question I’d like to ask you, Mr. Bennett,” she said after a while.
“Go on,” returned Bob, with dark forebodings.
“Go ahead,” Bob replied, feeling a sense of dread.
“Are you a sleep-walker?”
"Are you a sleepwalker?"
“No.”
“No.”
“Then why do you go wandering around nights when every one else has retired? Last night, for example?”
“Then why do you wander around at night when everyone else has gone to bed? Like last night, for instance?”
“So that hammer-thrower told you, did he?” remarked Bob. “I thought he would.”
“So that hammer thrower told you, did he?” Bob said. “I figured he would.”
“Do you blame him?”
"Do you hold him responsible?"
“Oh, I suppose it was his duty.” Every one seemed “telling” on Bob just at present.
“Oh, I guess it was his duty.” Everyone seemed “to be telling” on Bob right now.
“You do not deny it?”
"You don’t deny it?"
“Why should I?”
"Why would I?"
“Then we may accept his version of the story?”
“Can we go with his version of the story then?”
“Yes. I presume it was correct.”
“Yes. I assume it was correct.”
Again Miss Gerald remained thoughtful and Bob glanced out toward the gardeners. One of them seemed to have edged nearer. Bob smiled a little glumly. After having caught him in the web, the spiders were now winding the strands around and around him. Spiders do that when they don’t want to devour their victim right off. They mummify the victim, as it were, and tuck him away for the morrow.
Again, Miss Gerald was deep in thought while Bob glanced over at the gardeners. One of them appeared to have moved a bit closer. Bob smiled faintly. After trapping him in their web, the spiders were now wrapping the strands around him. Spiders do that when they’re not ready to consume their prey immediately. They basically mummify their victim and save it for later.
“Why”—the accusing presence was again speaking—“did you go down-stairs that first night of your arrival, after all the household had retired?”
“Why”—the accusing presence was again speaking—“did you go downstairs that first night of your arrival, after everyone in the house had gone to bed?”
Bob would have given a great deal not to answer that, but he had to. “I was showing some people out.”
Bob would have given a lot not to answer that, but he had to. “I was showing some people out.”
“Your accomplices?”
"Your partners in crime?"
“They might be called that.” Miserably. He wouldn’t “give away” Dan and the others, unless he had to—unless truth compelled him to designate them by name as his accomplices.
“They might be called that.” He said it miserably. He wouldn't "rat out" Dan and the others, unless he had to—unless the truth forced him to identify them by name as his accomplices.
“Are you aware, Mr. Bennett, of the seriousness of your answer?”
“Do you realize, Mr. Bennett, how serious your answer is?”
“Yes, I know. But how did you know—that I went down-stairs?”
“Yes, I know. But how did you know that I went downstairs?”
“I thought I heard some one go down. And then I got up and you went by my door, and I looked out, ever so quietly. You went in Dolly’s room and she woke up and caught you trying to take her brooch.”
“I thought I heard someone go downstairs. Then I got up, and you walked by my door, so I peeked out, really quietly. You went into Dolly’s room, and she woke up and caught you trying to take her brooch.”
Bob was silent. What was the use of talking?
Bob was quiet. What was the point of talking?
“Well, why don’t you speak?”
“Well, why don’t you talk?”
“It is true I went in Miss Dolly’s room, but I thought it was my room,” said Bob monotonously. “It was a mistake.” And Bob told how the brooch happened to fall to the floor. Strange to say, truth didn’t ring in his accents. He hadn’t much confidence at that moment in the old saw that truth is mighty and will prevail. Truth wasn’t mighty; it was a monster that sucked your heart’s blood. And Bob gazed once more with that famished look upon Miss Gerald. He found her a joy to the eye. Though she stood in a practical pose, the curves of her gracious and proud young figure were like ardent lines of poetry in a matutinal and passionate hymn to beauty. And Bob’s lips straightway yearned to sing hexameters to loveliness in the abstract—and in the flesh—instead of plodding along half-heartedly through unconvincing and purposeless explanations.
“It’s true I went into Miss Dolly’s room, but I thought it was mine,” Bob said in a flat tone. “It was a mistake.” He explained how the brooch ended up on the floor. Strangely, the truth didn't come through in his voice. He wasn’t very confident at that moment in the old saying that truth is powerful and will win out. Truth wasn’t powerful; it was a beast that drained the life out of you. And Bob looked once again at Miss Gerald with that hungry gaze. He found her a delight to behold. Even though she stood in a practical stance, the curves of her graceful and proud young figure resembled passionate lines of poetry in a morning hymn to beauty. Bob’s lips immediately longed to sing verses about beauty in the abstract—and in reality—instead of trudging through unconvincing and pointless explanations.
“You certainly do look fine to-day!” burst from Bob. It wasn’t exactly a hexameter nor yet an iambic mode of expression. But it had to come out.
“You really do look great today!” burst out Bob. It wasn’t exactly a hexameter or an iambic way of putting it. But it had to be said.
Roses blossomed on the girl’s proud cheek. Bob’s explosive and uncontrollable ardency would have been disconcerting, under any circumstances, but under such as those of the present—Miss Gerald’s eyes flashed.
Roses bloomed on the girl's proud cheek. Bob's intense and wild passion would have been unsettling in any situation, but in the current one—Miss Gerald's eyes sparkled.
“Isn’t—isn’t that rather irrelevant?” she said after a moment’s pause.
“Isn’t that kind of irrelevant?” she said after a moment’s pause.
“I—yes, I guess it is,” confessed Bob, and his head slowly fell. He looked at the hard marble pavement.
“I—yeah, I guess it is,” admitted Bob, and his head slowly dropped. He stared at the cold marble pavement.
A moment the girl stood with breast stirring, like an indignant goddess. “Have you—have you any information to volunteer?” she said at length icily.
A moment later, the girl stood with her chest heaving, like an upset goddess. “Do you—do you have any information to share?” she finally said coldly.
“Oh, I don’t have to volunteer,” answered Bob. And then rushed on to a Niagara of disaster. “Why don’t you ask that hammer-thrower? I suppose you’d believe anything”—he couldn’t keep back the bitter jealousy—“he tells you.”
“Oh, I don’t have to volunteer,” Bob replied. And then he rushed on to a flood of disaster. “Why don’t you ask that hammer thrower? I guess you’d believe anything”—he couldn't hide the bitter jealousy—“he tells you.”
An instant eyes met eyes. Bob’s now were stubborn, if forlorn and miserable. They braved the indignant, outraged violet ones. He even laughed, savagely, moodily. What would he not have given if she would only believe him, instead of—? But it was not to be. Yet this girl had his very soul. His miserable and forlorn eyes told her that. Whose eyes would have turned first, in that visual contest is a matter of uncertainty, for just then the enthusiastic voice of Gee-gee was heard “through the land.”
An instant later, their eyes locked. Bob’s were stubborn, but also sad and miserable. They met the furious, outraged violet ones with defiance. He even laughed, bitterly and moodily. What would he have given for her to just believe him, instead of—? But it wasn't meant to be. Still, this girl had his very soul. His sad and lost eyes conveyed that to her. Whose eyes would have faltered first in that stare-off is uncertain, for just then the excited voice of Gee-gee could be heard "through the land."
“Why, Mr. Bennett—you here? So glad to see you!”
“Why, Mr. Bennett—you’re here? So happy to see you!”
Bob forgot all about heroics. Gee-gee drifted in as if she were greeting an old and very dear friend, instead of a casual acquaintance, upon whom, indeed, she had rather forced herself, on a certain memorable evening. Bob wilted. When he recovered a little, Miss Gerald was gone. Below them the gardener who had caught Bob’s eye now drew a bit nearer. Bob turned on Gee-gee.
Bob forgot all about being a hero. Gee-gee floated in as if she were welcoming an old and very dear friend, rather than a casual acquaintance, whom she had somewhat obliged herself to, on a particular unforgettable evening. Bob felt deflated. When he gathered himself a bit, Miss Gerald had vanished. Below them, the gardener who had caught Bob’s attention was now approaching a bit closer. Bob turned to Gee-gee.
CHAPTER XVII—A GOOD DEAL OF GEE-GEE
“See here,” he said rather savagely, “this has got to stop.”
“Listen up,” he said somewhat aggressively, “this needs to end.”
Gee-gee stared. “Bless its little heart, what is it talking about?”
Gee-gee stared. “Aww, bless its little heart, what’s it talking about?”
“You know,” said Bob. The fact that he now saw Gwendoline Gerald rejoined afar by the hammer-thrower did not improve his temper.
“You know,” Bob said. The fact that he now saw Gwendoline Gerald reunited from a distance with the hammer thrower didn’t help his mood.
“Pardon me,” returned Gee-gee, tossing her auburn hair, “if I fail to connect. Mrs. Ralston has been good enough to treat us as her regular guests. And, indeed, why shouldn’t she?” With much dignity. “But if you feel I ain’t good enough to speak to your Lord Highmightiness, except at stage doors and alleys and roof gardens—” Cuttingly.
“Excuse me,” replied Gee-gee, flipping her auburn hair, “if I’m not getting through. Mrs. Ralston has been kind enough to treat us like her regular guests. And really, why shouldn’t she?” With a lot of poise. “But if you think I’m not worthy to talk to your Lord Highmightiness, except in stage doors, alleys, and rooftop gardens—” Sharply.
“This isn’t a question of social amenities,” said Bob. Gee-gee didn’t know what “amenities” meant and that made her madder. “You’ve come down here to raise a regular hornet’s nest.”
“This isn’t about social niceties,” Bob said. Gee-gee didn’t know what “niceties” meant, and that made her even angrier. “You’ve come down here to stir up a real hornet’s nest.”
Gee-gee sat down. She was so mad she had to do something. She wanted to slap Bob’s face, but she couldn’t do that. As Mrs. Ralston’s guest she couldn’t give way to her natural and primitive impulses. Her gown, modishly tight all over, strained almost to bursting point; it seemed to express the state of her feelings. A high-heeled shoe, encasing a pink-stockinged foot, agitated itself like a flag in a gale.
Gee-gee sat down. She was so angry she felt she had to do something. She wanted to slap Bob’s face, but she couldn’t. As Mrs. Ralston’s guest, she couldn’t give in to her natural and primal instincts. Her gown, fashionably tight all over, strained almost to the breaking point; it seemed to reflect how she was feeling. A high-heeled shoe, covering a foot in pink stockings, moved restlessly like a flag in a storm.
“I like that,” she gasped. “And who are you to talk to me like that? Maybe you think this is a rehearsal.”
“I like that,” she gasped. “And who do you think you are talking to me like that? Maybe you think this is a rehearsal.”
“For argument’s sake, I’ll own I’m not much account just at present,” said Bob. “Be that as it may, I’m going to try to stop the mischief you are up to, if I can.” He didn’t know how he would stop it; he was talking more to draw Gee-gee out than for any other purpose. Bob’s own testimony, as to certain occurrences on that memorable roof-garden evening, wouldn’t amount to much. The lawyers could impeach it even if they let him (Bob) testify at all in those awful divorce cases that were pending. But they probably wouldn’t let him take the witness-stand if he was a prisoner. Bob didn’t know quite what was the law governing the admissibility of testimony in a case like his.
“For the sake of argument, I’ll admit I’m not worth much right now,” said Bob. “That said, I’m going to try to put a stop to the trouble you’re causing, if I can.” He had no idea how he would manage it; he was speaking more to get a reaction from Gee-gee than for any other reason. Bob’s own account of certain events from that unforgettable evening on the roof garden wouldn’t carry much weight. The lawyers could discredit it even if they allowed him (Bob) to testify at all in those dreadful divorce cases that were pending. But they probably wouldn’t let him take the stand if he was in jail. Bob wasn’t exactly sure what the law was regarding the admissibility of testimony in a case like his.
Gee-gee shifted her mental attitude. She was getting her second breath and caution whispered to her to control herself. This handsome young gentleman had been the most indifferent member of the quartet on that inauspicious occasion on the roof; indeed, he had yawned in the midst of festivities. Bob, in love, cared not for show-girls or ponies. He had even tried to discourage Dan and the others in their zest for innocent enjoyment. Gee-gee now eyed Bob more critically. As a young-man-sure-of-himself, he had impressed her on that other occasion! Instinct had told her to avoid Bob and select Dan. Now that same instinct told her it might be better to temporize with this blunt-speaking young gentleman—to “sound” him.
Gee-gee adjusted her mindset. She was catching her second wind, and a voice in her head urged her to take it easy. This handsome young guy had been the most uninterested member of the group during that unfortunate incident on the roof; in fact, he had yawned right in the middle of the fun. Bob, in love, didn’t care about showgirls or ponies. He even tried to pull Dan and the others back from their enthusiasm for innocent enjoyment. Now, Gee-gee was looking at Bob more closely. As a confident young man, he had made an impression on her back then! Her instincts had told her to steer clear of Bob and go for Dan. Now those same instincts suggested it might be smarter to be a bit more cautious with this straightforward young man—to “test the waters” with him.
“You sure have got me floating,” observed Gee-gee in more lady-like accents. “I’m way up in the air. Throw out a few sand-bags and let’s hit the earth.”
“You definitely have me floating,” noted Gee-gee in a more feminine tone. “I’m way up in the air. Toss out a few sandbags and let’s come back down to earth.”
“That’s easy,” said Bob. “Do you deny you’re down here to raise Ned?”
"That's easy," Bob said. "Are you denying that you're down here to help Ned?"
“Do I deny it?” remarked Gee-gee with flashing eyes. “Do I? We are down here to fill a little professional engagement. We are down here on account of our histrionic talents.” A sound came from Bob’s throat. Gee-gee professed not to notice it. “We are paid a fee—not a small one—to come down here, to do privately our little turn which was the hit of the piece and the talk of Broadway.”
“Do I deny it?” said Gee-gee with bright eyes. “Do I? We’re down here for a little job. We’re down here because of our acting skills.” A noise came from Bob’s throat. Gee-gee pretended not to hear it. “We’re getting paid a fee—not a small one—to come down here and perform our little act, which was the highlight of the show and the talk of Broadway.”
“Bosh!” said Bob coolly. Gee-gee looked dangerous. Once more the pink-stockinged ankle began to swing agitatedly, and again reckless Bob narrowly escaped a slap in the face. “Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence got Mrs. Ralston to ask you down here,” he went on. “You weren’t asked on account of your histrionic ability. You were asked because it was the only feasible way to get you beyond other strong, I may even say desperate, and to them, inimical influences. Mrs. Ralston isn’t the only one who is financing your little rural expedition. I guess you know what I mean?”
“Bosh!” Bob said coolly. Gee-gee looked dangerous. Once again, the pink-stockinged ankle began to swing nervously, and once more, reckless Bob barely dodged a slap to the face. “Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence had Mrs. Ralston invite you down here,” he continued. “You weren’t invited because of your acting skills. You were invited because it was the only practical way to get you away from other strong, I might even say desperate, and to them, hostile influences. Mrs. Ralston isn’t the only one funding your little trip to the countryside. I think you know what I’m talking about?”
“Nix!” said Gee-gee. “You’ve got me up in the air again. Turn the little wheel around and let the car come down. This ain’t Sunday, and if I was taking a little Coney-Island treat, I wouldn’t choose you for my escort.”
“Nix!” said Gee-gee. “You’ve got me all worked up again. Turn the little wheel around and let the car come down. This isn’t Sunday, and if I was going for a little Coney Island treat, I wouldn’t pick you as my date.”
“It certainly isn’t Sunday in the sense of a day of rest,” remarked Bob gloomily. By this time the hammer-man and Miss Gerald were beyond his range of vision. But he would not think of them; he must not. He had a duty to perform here; maybe it would do no good, but it was his duty to try. “That publicity racket is all right up to a certain point,” he said, bending his reproachful eyes upon Gee-gee. “But when it comes to smashing reputations, stretching the truth, and injuring others irreparably—all for a little cheap nauseating notoriety—Well”—Bob hit straight from the shoulder—“I tell you it’s rotten. And I, for one, shall do what I can to show up the whole conspiracy. That’s what it is. It would be different if you were going to tell what was so, but you aren’t. It isn’t in the cards.”
“It definitely doesn’t feel like Sunday as a day of rest,” Bob said gloomily. By now, the hammer-man and Miss Gerald were out of his sight. But he wouldn’t think about them; he couldn’t. He had a responsibility to fulfill here; maybe it wouldn’t help, but it was his duty to try. “That publicity game is fine up to a point,” he said, looking reproachfully at Gee-gee. “But when it involves ruining reputations, bending the truth, and permanently harming others—all for a bit of cheap, disgusting attention—Well”—Bob spoke firmly—“I’m telling you it’s wrong. And I, for one, will do what I can to expose the whole scheme. That’s what it is. It would be different if you were going to share the truth, but you’re not. It’s just not in the cards.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gee-gee’s tight dress nearly exploded now. The blood had receded from her face and left it a mottled cream while her greenish eyes glowed like opals. Her expression was animalistic. It seemed to say she would like to crush something beneath those high heels and grind them into it.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gee-gee’s tight dress was almost about to burst now. The color had drained from her face, leaving it a blotchy cream while her greenish eyes sparkled like opals. Her expression was feral. It seemed to say she wanted to crush something under those high heels and grind it into the ground.
“Yes, you do,” said Bob. “And it will be a frame-up for poor old Dan and Clarence, too!” Dickie’s description of what was going to happen recurred to him poignantly. “I tell you it’s a wicked cruel thing to do. I repeat, it’s rotten.”
“Yes, you do,” Bob said. “And it’s going to be a set-up for poor old Dan and Clarence, too!” Dickie’s description of what was about to happen hit him hard. “I’m telling you, it’s a wickedly cruel thing to do. I’ll say it again, it’s awful.”
If he thought he could overwhelm Gee-gee by a display of superior masculine strength and moral force, he was mistaken. Gee-gee wasn’t that kind of a girl. She had some force herself, though whether of the moral kind is another matter.
If he thought he could intimidate Gee-gee by showing off his strength and moral superiority, he was wrong. Gee-gee wasn’t that type of girl. She had her own power, though whether it was moral is another question.
“‘Wicked!’ ‘Rotten!’ ‘Cheap!’” she repeated slowly, but breathing hard. “Listen to the infant! ‘Rotten!’” She lingered on the word as if it had a familiar sound. “Well, what is life, anyhow?” she flung out suddenly at the six-foot “infant.” “Maybe you think this theater business is like going to Sunday-school—that all we have to do is to hold goody-goody hands and sing those salvation songs! Salvation! Gee!” And Gee-gee folded her arms. She seemed to meditate. “You know what kind of salvation a girl gets down on old Broadway?” she scoffed. “Aren’t the men nice and kind? Don’t they take you by the hand and say: ‘Come on, little girl, I’ll give you a helping hand.’ Oh, yes, they give you a helping hand. But it isn’t ‘up.’ It’s all ‘down.’ And every one wants to see how deep they can make it. Say, Infant, I was born in one of those avenues with letters. People like these”—looking toward the house—“don’t know nothing about that kind of an avenue. It ought to be called a rotten alley. That’s where I learned what ‘rotten’ meant. Nice young gentlemen like you who toddled about with nursie in the park can’t tell me.”
“‘Wicked!’ ‘Rotten!’ ‘Cheap!’” she repeated slowly, but breathing heavily. “Listen to the baby! ‘Rotten!’” She lingered on the word as if it had a familiar ring. “Well, what is life, anyway?” she suddenly threw at the six-foot “baby.” “Maybe you think this theater thing is like going to Sunday school—that all we have to do is hold hands and sing those salvation songs! Salvation! Ugh!” And Ugh-ugh crossed her arms. She seemed to think deeply. “You know what kind of salvation a girl gets down on old Broadway?” she mocked. “Aren’t the men nice and kind? Don’t they take you by the hand and say: ‘Come on, little girl, I’ll give you a helping hand.’ Oh, yes, they give you a helping hand. But it’s not ‘up.’ It’s all ‘down.’ And everyone wants to see how deep they can make it. Hey, Baby, I was born in one of those lettered avenues. People like these”—looking toward the audience—“don’t know anything about that kind of avenue. It ought to be called a rotten alley. That’s where I learned what ‘rotten’ meant. Nice young gentlemen like you who strolled around with a nanny in the park can’t tell me.”
Bob tried not to look small; he endeavored to maintain his dignity. He was almost sorry he had got Gee-gee started. The conversation was leading into unexpected channels. “Why, I toddled about in rottenness,” went on Gee-gee. “Gutters were my playground.” Dreamily. She seemed to be forgetting her resentment in these childhood recollections. “Sometimes I slept in cellar doorways, with the rotten cabbages all around. But they and all the rest of the spoiled things seemed to agree with me. I’ve thrived on rottenness, Infant!” Bob winced. “It’s all that some girls get. Men!” And Gee-gee laughed. Here was a topic she could dilate on. Again the opal eyes gleamed tigerishly. “I’ve got a lot of cause to love ’em. Oh, ain’t they particular about their reputations!” Gee-gee’s chuckle was fiendish. “Poor, precious little dears! Be careful and don’t get a teeny speck of smudge on their snowy white wings! My! look out! don’t splash ’em! Or, if you do, rub it off quick so the people in church won’t see it. But when it comes to us”—Gee-gee showed her teeth. “I learned when I was in the gutter that I had to fight. Sometimes I had to fight with dogs for a crust. Sometimes with boys who were worse still. Later, with men who were worst of all. And,” said Gee-gee, again tossing her auburn mane, “I’m still fighting, Infant!”
Bob tried not to appear small; he worked hard to keep his dignity. He almost regretted getting Gee-gee started. The conversation was heading in unexpected directions. “I used to wander around in garbage,” Gee-gee continued. “Gutters were my playground.” Dreamily. She seemed to be letting go of her resentment in these childhood memories. “Sometimes I slept in cellar doorways, surrounded by rotten cabbages. But they and all the other spoiled things seemed to suit me just fine. I’ve thrived on decay, baby!” Bob winced. “It’s all that some girls get. Men!” And Gee-gee laughed. Here was a topic she could really dig into. Again, her opal eyes sparkled fiercely. “I have plenty of reasons to love them. Oh, aren't they fussy about their reputations!” Gee-gee’s chuckle was wicked. “Poor, precious little dears! Be careful not to get a tiny speck of dirt on their pristine white wings! My! Watch out! Don’t splash them! Or if you do, wipe it off quickly so the people in church won’t see it. But when it comes to us”—Gee-gee bared her teeth. “I learned in the gutter that I had to fight. Sometimes I had to fight with dogs for a scrap of food. Sometimes with boys who were even worse. Later, with men who were the worst of all. And,” said Gee-gee, once again flipping her auburn hair, “I’m still fighting, baby!”
“Which means,” said Bob slowly, overlooking these repeated insults to his dignity, “you aren’t here just to exhibit those histrionic talents you talked about?”
“Which means,” Bob said slowly, ignoring the repeated insults to his dignity, “you’re not here just to show off those dramatic skills you mentioned?”
Gee-gee laughed. She was feeling better-natured now that she had relieved herself by speaking of some of those “wrongs” she and her sex had undoubtedly to endure. There were times when Gee-gee just had to moralize; it was born in her to do so. And she liked particularly to grill the men, and after the grilling—usually to the receptive and sympathetic Gid-up—she particularly liked, also, to go out and angle for one. And after he had taken the hook—the deeper the better—Gee-gee dearly loved the piscatorial sport that came later, of watching the rushes, the wild turnings, the frenzied leaps.
Gee-gee laughed. She was in a better mood now that she had shared some of the “wrongs” that she and women in general had to deal with. There were times when Gee-gee just had to get philosophical; it was part of her nature. She especially enjoyed putting the men on the spot, and after the questioning—usually with the understanding and supportive Gid-up—she really liked to go out and fish for one. And once he was hooked—the deeper, the better—Gee-gee truly loved the thrilling game that followed, watching the struggles, the wild twists, and the frantic jumps.
She even began to eye the infant now with sleepy green eyes. But no hook for him! He wasn’t hungry. He wouldn’t even smell of a bait. Gee-gee felt this, having quite an instinct in such matters. Perhaps experience, too, had helped make her a good fisherwoman. So she didn’t even bother making any casts for Bob. But she answered him sweetly enough, having now recovered her poise and being more sure of her ground:
She even started to look at the baby now with sleepy green eyes. But there was no way to reel him in! He wasn’t hungry. He wouldn’t even take the bait. Gee-gee sensed this, having a natural instinct for these things. Maybe experience also made her a talented fisherwoman. So she didn’t even bother casting for Bob. But she responded to him sweetly enough, having regained her composure and feeling more confident:
“It doesn’t mean anything of the sort. Our act has been praised in a number of the newspapers, I would have you understand.”
“It doesn’t mean anything like that. Our performance has been praised in several newspapers, just so you know.”
“All right,” said Bob, as strenuously as he was capable of speaking. “I only wanted you to know that between you and me it will be—fight!”
“All right,” said Bob, as forcefully as he could manage. “I just wanted you to know that between you and me it’s going to be—a fight!”
This was sheer bluff, but he thought it might deter Gee-gee a little. It might curb just a bit that lurid imagination of hers.
This was total bluff, but he thought it might hold Gee-gee back a little. It might temper that wild imagination of hers just a bit.
Gee-gee got up now, laughing musically. Also, she showed once more her white teeth. Then she stretched somewhat robust arms.
Gee-gee got up now, laughing joyfully. She also revealed her white teeth again. Then she stretched her strong arms.
“Fight with you?” she scoffed. “Why, you can’t fight, Infant! You haven’t grown up yet.”
“Fight with you?” she laughed. “Come on, you can’t fight, Baby! You’re not grown up yet.”
Bob had the grace to blush and Gee-gee, about to depart, noticed it. He looked fresh and big and nice to her at that moment, so nice, indeed, that suddenly she did throw out a bait—one of her most brilliant smiles, supplemented by a speaking, sleepy glance. But Bob didn’t see the bait. He was like a fish in a pool too deep for her line. Gee-gee shrugged; then she walked away. Snip! That imitation gardener was now among the vines, right underneath where Bob was sitting.
Bob blushed gracefully, and Gee-gee, about to leave, noticed it. He looked fresh, tall, and nice to her at that moment—so nice, in fact, that she couldn’t help but throw out a lure—one of her best smiles, paired with a charming, sleepy glance. But Bob didn’t notice the lure. He was like a fish in a pool too deep for her bait. Gee-gee shrugged and then walked away. Snip! That fake gardener was now among the vines, right underneath where Bob was sitting.
Gee-gee’s little act was better than Bob expected it would be. She sang a French song with no more vulgarity than would mask as piquancy and the men applauded loudly. Gee-gee was a success. Gid-up put hers “over,” too; then together they did a few new dances not ungracefully. Mrs. Dan’s face was rather a study. She was an extremist on the sex question and would take the woman’s side against the man every time. Theoretically, she would invite injured innocence right into camp. She reversed that old humbug saying, “The woman did tempt me;” according to her philosophy, man, being naturally not so good as a woman, was entitled to shoulder the bulk of the blame. But when she looked at Gee-gee she may have had her doubts.
Gee-gee’s little performance exceeded Bob's expectations. She sang a French song with just enough spice to be interesting, and the men clapped enthusiastically. Gee-gee was a hit. Gid-up also made her mark; then they both showcased a few new dances, moving gracefully. Mrs. Dan’s expression was quite telling. She had extreme views on gender issues and always sided with women over men. Theoretically, she would invite innocent victims right into her camp. She flipped the old saying, “The woman did tempt me;” in her view, men, being inherently less virtuous than women, deserved most of the blame. But when she saw Gee-gee, she might have started to question her stance.
She may even have regretted being instrumental in bringing her here at all. And it is not unlikely that Mrs. Clarence may have entertained a few secret regrets also, and doubts as to the application of a broad-minded big way of looking at certain things pertaining to her own sex, when she beheld her of the saucy turned-up nose and brazen freckle. Certain it is, both Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence looked more serious and thoughtful than jubilant. They didn’t applaud; they just seemed to, bringing their hands together without making a noise. But both ladies were now committed to the inevitable. Gee-gee and Gid-up, displaying their “histrionic talents,” were but calculated to make Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence the more determined to pursue the matter to the bitter end. Among the guests now was a certain legal light. His presence there at this particular time—when the two G’s adorned the festivities—might be a mere coincidence; on the other hand it might signify much. He had certainly spent a long time that afternoon talking to Gee-gee and Gid-up. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence came in contact with them only by proxy.
She might even have regretted being the reason for bringing her here at all. It's also possible that Mrs. Clarence had some secret regrets and doubts about a broad-minded perspective on issues related to her own gender when she saw the girl with the sassy turned-up nose and bold freckles. It's clear that both Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence looked more serious and thoughtful than happy. They didn’t clap; they just brought their hands together without making any noise. But both ladies were now committed to what was inevitable. Gee-gee and Gid-up, showcasing their "acting skills," only made Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence more determined to see things through to the end. Among the guests was a certain influential lawyer. His presence at this specific time—when the two G's were part of the festivities—could be a mere coincidence; on the other hand, it might mean a lot. He had certainly spent a long time that afternoon chatting with Gee-gee and Gid-up. Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence only interacted with them indirectly.
Bob was a deeply pained spectator of the wordless drama that was being enacted. He, alone, besides those directly involved, knew the tragedy lurking behind the mocking face of comedy. That gay music sounded to Bob like a fugue. He could well believe what it was costing Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence to attain their purpose. They weren’t enjoying themselves. It was altogether a miserable business, and almost made Bob forget his own tragedy. A little incident, however, brought the latter once more vividly to mind.
Bob was a deeply pained observer of the silent drama unfolding around him. He alone, besides those directly involved, understood the tragedy hidden behind the playful facade of comedy. That upbeat music sounded to Bob like a fugue. He could easily imagine the toll it was taking on Mrs. Dan and Mrs. Clarence to achieve their goal. They weren’t having any fun. It was a completely miserable situation, and it almost made Bob forget his own troubles. However, a small incident brought those memories rushing back to him.
It occurred while Gee-gee, in answer to applause at the conclusion of her dance with Gid-up, was singing another of those risque, French cafe chantant songs. Bob sat next to the temperamental little thing who was behaving with exemplary consistency. She had been comporting herself in strictly comrade-fashion ever since their last talk, not once overdoing the little chum act. She hadn’t asked him for a single kiss or to put his arm about her waist in dark corners. Perhaps she was too anxious on his account for sentimental considerations. She couldn’t understand the way things were going—that is, things pertaining to Bob.
It happened while Gee-gee, responding to applause at the end of her dance with Gid-up, was singing another one of those risqué French café songs. Bob sat next to the temperamental little woman who was acting with remarkable consistency. She had been keeping her distance ever since their last conversation, never once pushing the friend act too far. She hadn’t asked him for a single kiss or to wrap his arm around her waist in the shadows. Maybe she was too concerned about him to focus on anything sentimental. She couldn’t grasp what was going on—especially when it came to Bob.
“Why don’t they?” once she whispered to Bob.
“Why don’t they?” she once whispered to Bob.
He knew what she meant—arrest him? He shook his head. “Dallying,” he answered.
He understood what she was implying—arrest him? He shook his head. “Just wasting time,” he replied.
“I could just scratch his eyes out,” she murmured with excess of loyalty.
“I could just scratch his eyes out,” she whispered with overwhelming loyalty.
“Whose?”
"Whose is this?"
“That monocle-man. You know what I did this afternoon?”
“That monocle guy. You know what I did this afternoon?”
“No.” Bob, however, surmised it would be something interesting.
“No.” Bob, however, guessed it would be something interesting.
“I went up to that monocle-man and told him every word I had said to him the night before wasn’t so.”
“I approached that guy with the monocle and told him that everything I said to him the night before wasn’t true.”
“You did?” Staring at her.
"You did?" He stared at her.
“Yes, I did.” Setting her cherry lips firmly. “I told him I was just trying to fool him and that I would never—never—never testify to such rubbish, if called on to do so.”
“Yes, I did.” She pressed her cherry lips together firmly. “I told him I was just trying to mess with him and that I would never—never—never testify to such nonsense, if I was called to do so.”
“But you’ll have to,” said Bob. “You’ve got to tell the truth.”
“But you have to,” Bob said. “You need to tell the truth.”
“I’d tell whoppers by the bushel to help you,” she confided to him unblushingly. “That’s the kind of a friend I am.”
“I’d tell huge lies by the dozen to help you,” she admitted to him without any shame. “That’s the kind of friend I am.”
“But I wouldn’t have you. I wouldn’t let you,” he murmured in mild consternation. “Great Scott! they’d have you up for perjury.”
“But I wouldn’t have you. I wouldn’t allow it,” he murmured, slightly alarmed. “Good grief! They’d accuse you of perjury.”
“Oh, no, they wouldn’t. I’d do it so cleverly.”
“Oh, no, they wouldn’t. I’d handle it really smartly.”
“But the monocle-man would testify, too.”
“But the guy with the monocle would testify, too.”
“Who do you think a jury would rather believe, me or him?” she demanded confidently. “Especially if I was all dressed up and looked at them, all the time I was testifying.”
“Who do you think a jury would believe more, me or him?” she asked confidently. “Especially if I was all dressed up and looked at them while I was testifying.”
“Well,” said Bob, “I don’t believe you could do it, anyhow. Besides, it would be stretching friendship too far. Though you’re a jolly little pal to offer to!” She hunched a dainty little shoulder against his strong arm.
“Well,” said Bob, “I really don’t think you could pull it off, anyway. Plus, it would be taking our friendship a bit too far. Still, you’re such a great little friend for suggesting it!” She nudged a delicate shoulder against his strong arm.
“I’d go through fire and water for you,” breathed the jolly little pal.
“I’d go through anything for you,” breathed the cheerful little friend.
“It’s fine of you to say it,” answered Bob fervently. “I haven’t many friends now, you know. But—but it’s impossible, what you propose. It would only get you into trouble. I’d be a big brute to allow that. It would make me out a fine pal, wouldn’t it? Besides, it wouldn’t do any good. Some one else heard me go into your room and knows all about it. Some one else would fortify what the monocle-man would tell. And her testimony and his would overwhelm yours. And I’d never forgive myself for your being made a victim of your own loyalty.”
“It’s easy for you to say that,” Bob replied passionately. “I don’t have many friends these days, you know. But—this is impossible, what you’re suggesting. It would only lead to trouble for you. I’d be a real jerk to let that happen. It would make me look like a terrible friend, right? Plus, it wouldn’t help at all. Someone else saw me go into your room and knows everything. That person would back up what the monocle guy would say. And her testimony along with his would totally outweigh yours. I’d never forgive myself for letting you become a victim of your own loyalty.”
“Was that some one else Miss Gerald?” asked the jolly little pal quickly.
“Was that someone else, Miss Gerald?” asked the cheerful little friend quickly.
“Yes,” said Bob. As he spoke he glanced toward Miss Gerald.
“Yes,” Bob said, glancing over at Miss Gerald as he spoke.
Gee-gee had now started to sing and nearly every one’s head was turned toward the vivacious vocalist. Bob saw Miss Gerald’s proud profile. He saw, too, the hammer-thrower, next to her, as usual. On the other side of the hammer-thrower—the side nearer where Gee-gee stood—was the lady who had given Bob the “cold shoulder” a few nights ago at dinner. The hammer-thrower’s eyes were naturally turned toward that cold shoulder now, and, as naturally, his gaze should have been bent over it, toward the vocal center of attraction for the moment.
Gee-gee had now started to sing, and almost everyone was looking at the lively singer. Bob noticed Miss Gerald’s proud profile. He also saw the hammer-thrower next to her, as usual. On the other side of the hammer-thrower—the side closer to where Gee-gee stood—was the woman who had given Bob the “cold shoulder” a few nights ago at dinner. The hammer-thrower’s eyes were naturally drawn to that cold shoulder now, and, just as naturally, his gaze should have been focused on the vocal center of attention at the moment.
But his gaze had stopped at the shoulder, or something on it. Bob noted that look. For a fraction of a minute, or second, it revealed a sudden new odd intensity as it rested on a lovely string of pearls ornamenting the cold shoulder. And at the same instant a wave of light seemed to sweep over Bob. For that fraction of a minute he seemed strangely, amazingly, to have been afforded a swift glimpse into a soul.
But his gaze had paused at the shoulder, or something on it. Bob noticed that look. For just a moment, it had a sudden, unusual intensity as it lingered on a beautiful string of pearls adorning the cold shoulder. And at that very moment, a wave of light seemed to wash over Bob. For that brief moment, he felt strangely, incredibly, as if he had been given a quick glimpse into a soul.
The whole thing was psychic. Bob couldn’t have told just how he came to know. But he knew. He was sure now who had taken Mrs. Vanderpool’s brooch. Strangely, too, the hammer-thrower, after that fraction of a second’s relaxation of vigilance over his inner secret self, should have turned and looked straight toward Bob. His look was now heavy, normal. Bob’s was burning.
The whole thing felt psychic. Bob couldn’t explain how he knew, but he was sure now who had taken Mrs. Vanderpool’s brooch. Oddly enough, after that brief moment of letting his guard down, the hammer-thrower turned and looked directly at Bob. His gaze was now intense and normal. Bob’s was intense and fiery.
“You!” his eyes said as plainly as if he had called out the word.
“You!” his eyes said as clearly as if he had shouted the word.
The hammer-thrower’s face did not change in the least; nor did his look. He turned his eyes toward the singer with heavy nonchalance and never had his face appeared more honest and trustworthy.
The hammer-thrower’s expression didn’t change at all; neither did his gaze. He glanced at the singer with a relaxed indifference, and his face had never looked more genuine and reliable.
“Oh, you beauty!” murmured Bob admiringly.
“Oh, you gorgeous!” Bob murmured in admiration.
“Do you really think she is?” asked the jolly little pal. She thought Bob meant Gee-gee. “Is that the style you like?”
“Do you really think she is?” asked the cheerful little friend. She thought Bob was talking about Gee-gee. “Is that your kind of style?”
“Thinking of something else,” said Bob.
“Thinking of something else,” Bob said.
“Some one, you mean?” with slight reproach.
“Someone, you mean?” with a hint of reproach.
“Pals aren’t jealous,” he reminded her. “Besides, it was a man.”
“Friends don’t get jealous,” he reminded her. “Plus, it was a guy.”
“Oh!” she said wonderingly.
“Oh!” she said in awe.
“For life is but a game of hide-and-seek,”
“For life is just a game of hide-and-seek,”
sang Gee-gee, in the rather execrable French some one had drilled into her.
sang Gee-gee, in the pretty terrible French someone had drilled into her.
“Come and catch me,” was the refrain.
“Come and catch me,” was the refrain.
Bob shook his head. He didn’t want to play at that game. But life was a game of hide-and-seek, all right. He permitted himself the luxury of smiling as he once more looked over at the hammer-thrower and applauded Gee-gee. Odd, the idea of the hammer-thrower being that person he (Bob) was supposed to be, had never occurred to the latter! But no one ever would suspect that face! “My face is my fortune, sir,” he might have said. The hammer-thrower caught Bob’s smile.
Bob shook his head. He didn’t want to take part in that game. But life was definitely a game of hide-and-seek. He allowed himself the pleasure of smiling as he looked over at the hammer-thrower and applauded Gee-gee. It was strange; the idea that the hammer-thrower was actually someone he was meant to be had never crossed his mind! But nobody would ever suspect that face! “My face is my fortune, sir,” he might have joked. The hammer-thrower noticed Bob’s smile.
“‘Come and catch me,’” reiterated Gee-gee.
“‘Come and catch me,’” Gee-gee said again.
That might be applicable to the hammer-thrower. Bob, for the moment, felt as happy as a child who has discovered the solution of a puzzle. So that when Miss Gerald deigned casually to glance at him, she was surprised at his new expression. It seemed a long while since Bob had looked happy, but now he looked almost like his old self. Was it the near presence of the temperamental young thing that had wrought this change, Miss Gerald might well have asked herself.
That might apply to the hammer-thrower. Bob, for now, felt as happy as a child who has figured out a puzzle. So when Miss Gerald casually glanced at him, she was surprised by his new expression. It had been quite a while since Bob had looked happy, but now he seemed almost like his old self. Miss Gerald might well have wondered if it was the close presence of the temperamental young woman that caused this change.
Violet eyes looked now into temperamental dark ones. Gwendoline, too, was smiling—at the song. But it was that cryptic kind of a smile once more. Bob’s smile was a rather large cryptic counterpart of Miss Gerald’s. The temperamental little thing, though, didn’t smile. She seemed reading Miss Gerald’s soul. She was dropping a plumb-line deep down into it.
Violet eyes now looked into moody dark ones. Gwendoline was also smiling—at the song. But it was that mysterious kind of smile again. Bob’s smile was a much bigger enigmatic version of Miss Gerald’s. The feisty little one, however, didn’t smile. She seemed to be reading Miss Gerald’s soul. She was dropping a plumb line deep into it.
Then Miss Gerald turned again to the hammer-thrower, who talked to her just as if Bob hadn’t seen anything, or imagined he had. Gee-gee sat down, at the same time condescending to bestow upon Bob a triumphal look. He had dared to scoff at her histrionic talent, had he? Well, she had shown him—and them. Maybe with a little publicity, she would become a star of dazzling magnitude. At that moment, the world looked bright to Gee-gee.
Then Miss Gerald turned back to the hammer-thrower, who spoke to her as if Bob hadn’t seen anything or thought he had. Gee-gee sat down, simultaneously giving Bob a triumphant stare. He had dared to mock her dramatic talent, hadn’t he? Well, she had proven him—and them—wrong. Maybe with a bit of publicity, she would become a shining star. At that moment, the world seemed bright to Gee-gee.
CHAPTER XVIII—A FORMIDABLE ADVERSARY
What a merry mad wag that hammer-thrower really must be at heart! thought Bob. How he was chuckling inside, or laughing in his sleeve most of the time while he went around with that heavy, serious, reliable visage of his! And that ponderous manner?—What lively little imps of mischief or fancy it concealed! That simulated slow tread, too?—Bob surmised he could get around pretty fast on occasions, if he wanted to, or had to. He was dancing very seriously with Miss Gerald now, seeming to take dancing as a kind of a moral lesson. Oh, that “duty talk” to Bob! He would “consider” Bob’s case!—He wanted to ponder over it—he? And how painfully in earnest he had been when he had sprung what his father had said about not giving a fellow a shove when he was down!
What a fun and crazy guy that hammer-thrower must really be at heart! Bob thought. How he chuckled inside or laughed secretly most of the time while he walked around with that heavy, serious, reliable face of his! And that serious demeanor?—What playful little troublemakers or imaginations it hid! That pretended slow walk, too?—Bob guessed he could move pretty quickly at times if he wanted to or needed to. He was dancing very seriously with Miss Gerald now, acting like dancing was some sort of moral lesson. Oh, that “duty talk” to Bob! He would “think about” Bob’s situation!—He wanted to mull it over—him? And how intensely serious he had been when he mentioned what his father had said about not giving someone a push when they were down!
Bob disentangled himself as soon as he could from the temperamental little thing and went into the billiard room, where he began to toy with the ivories. If there was one thing he could do, it was play billiards. But he retired to the seclusion of the billiard room now principally for the reason that he expected the hammer-thrower would follow him there. He felt almost sure the other would seek him. So, though Bob proceeded to execute one or two fancy shots with much skill, his thoughts were not on the ivories. He was considering his position in relation to the hammer-thrower. He (Bob) might entertain a profound conviction regarding the latter’s profession, but could he prove anything?
Bob separated himself from the difficult little person as soon as he could and went into the billiard room, where he started to mess around with the pool balls. If there was one thing he was good at, it was playing billiards. But he went into the privacy of the billiard room mainly because he expected the hammer-thrower would follow him there. He felt pretty sure the other guy would come looking for him. So, even though Bob started to pull off one or two impressive shots with great skill, his mind wasn’t on the game. He was thinking about his situation regarding the hammer-thrower. Bob might have strong beliefs about the other person's profession, but could he back it up with evidence?
True, he now remembered and could point out that the latter had attended all those functions where losses had occurred. But that wasn’t in itself particularly significant. Other people, also, had attended all the functions in question. Bob couldn’t even actually swear he had seen the other in his room when he had dropped something from Bob’s window to some one lurking below. Bob hadn’t had the chance to recognize him on that occasion. As far as evidence went, the “boot was all on the other leg.” The hammer-thrower was obviously in a position to use Bob to pull chestnuts out of the fire for him.
True, he now remembered and could point out that the other person had attended all those events where losses occurred. But that wasn’t particularly significant. Other people had also been present at all the relevant events. Bob couldn’t even genuinely claim that he had seen the other person in his room when he dropped something from Bob’s window to someone lurking below. Bob hadn’t had the chance to recognize him at that moment. As far as evidence went, the “boot was all on the other leg.” The hammer-thrower was clearly in a position to use Bob to get him out of trouble.
But why had he not denounced Bob to the entire household, then and there, when he had discovered him before Gee-gee’s door? Perhaps the hammer-thrower didn’t yet know that any one knew there had been substituted one or two imitation articles of jewelry for real ones. If this were so, then from his point of view a denunciation of Bob might lead to an investigation which would reveal the fact that substitutions had occurred and in consequence he would be but curtailing the period of his own future activities in this decidedly fertile field. He hadn’t, of course, refrained through any feeling of charity or commiseration for Bob. He had, moreover, paved the way to use Bob in the future, if need be, by discreetly mentioning the incident to Miss Gerald. Bob might prove serviceable as an emergency man. All this had no doubt been floating through the hammer-thrower’s brain while he had stood there with that puzzled, aggrieved and righteous expression.
But why hadn’t he called out Bob to the whole household right then, when he caught him in front of Gee-gee’s door? Maybe the hammer-thrower didn’t realize that anyone knew there had been fake jewelry swapped for the real stuff. If that was the case, then from his perspective, telling on Bob might spark an investigation that would uncover the swaps, and he’d just be shortening his own future opportunities in this clearly profitable area. He hadn’t held back out of any sense of kindness or pity for Bob. He had, in fact, set the stage to use Bob later if necessary, by casually mentioning the incident to Miss Gerald. Bob could become useful as a backup plan. All of this had likely been running through the hammer-thrower’s mind while he stood there with that confused, offended, and self-righteous look.
A slight sound behind him caused Bob to turn quickly and, as he had expected, he beheld the hammer-thrower. Here was renewed confirmation of that which he had just learned.
A faint noise behind him made Bob turn around quickly and, just as he had anticipated, he saw the hammer-thrower. This was more proof of what he had just found out.
“I felt it my duty to inform Miss Gerald of what occurred last night,” began the hammer-thrower without prelude.
“I felt it was my duty to inform Miss Gerald about what happened last night,” the hammer thrower started without any introduction.
“I know that already,” said Bob, continuing his play.
“I know that already,” Bob said, continuing his game.
“Ah, then I am wasting time. But having concluded that it was incumbent on me to take that course, I thought it but right to come to you and tell you what I had done. Square thing, you know.”
“Ah, then I’m wasting time. But since I figured it was my responsibility to take that path, I thought it was only fair to come to you and let you know what I had done. Straightforward, you know.”
Bob grinned. “Say it in Latin,” he observed flippantly.
Bob grinned. “Say it in Latin,” he said casually.
A slight frown gathered on the other’s brow. “I really fail to understand. You placed me in an unpleasant position. It was not easy to speak of such a matter.”
A slight frown appeared on the other person's brow. “I really don’t get it. You put me in a tough spot. It wasn’t easy to talk about something like this.”
“Then why did you?” said Bob lightly, executing a difficult play.
“Then why did you?” Bob asked casually, making a tricky move.
“You do not seem to realize there are some things we have to do.”
“You don’t seem to understand that there are some things we need to take care of.”
“Duty, eh?” observed Bob with another grin.
“Duty, huh?” Bob remarked with another grin.
“Without wishing to pose as puritanical, or as a prig, I may say you have hit the nail fairly on the head.”
“Without wanting to come off as uptight or self-righteous, I can say you’ve nailed it.”
“Oh, you aren’t a prig,” said Bob. “You’re a lu-lu.”
“Oh, you’re not a square,” said Bob. “You’re a weirdo.”
“I don’t know whether you mean to be complimentary or not,” returned the hammer-thrower with unvarying seriousness. “As I believe I have remarked before, you appear totally not to comprehend your own position. I might have awakened the house and what would have been your status then? There have of late been so many mysterious burglaries at large country-houses and in the big city homes of the affluent that a guest, found rambling about in pajamas at unseemly hours, courts, to put it mildly, suspicion. Anyhow, for my own protection, I had to speak to Miss Gerald. You see that, don’t you? We’ll waive the moral side.”
“I can’t tell if you’re trying to compliment me or not,” the hammer-thrower replied with the same serious tone. “As I think I’ve mentioned before, you really don’t seem to get your own situation. I could have woken everyone up, and then what would your standing be? Lately, there have been so many mysterious burglaries at large country houses and in the big city homes of wealthy people that finding a guest wandering around in pajamas at odd hours definitely raises suspicion, to say the least. Either way, I had to talk to Miss Gerald for my own protection. You understand that, right? Let’s ignore the moral aspect.”
“‘Your own protection’ is good,” said Bob, sending his ball twice around the table and complacently observing the result.
“‘Your own protection’ is good,” said Bob, rolling his ball around the table twice and casually watching what happened.
“I mean that if it became known that I had secreted you in my room and said nothing about it, it would, in a measure, place me in the light of being an accomplice,” returned the hammer-thrower, ignoring the point in Bob’s last words. “I don’t know whether anything will be discovered missing here or not, but if there should be—?”
“I mean that if it became known that I had hid you in my room and said nothing about it, it would, to some extent, make me look like an accomplice,” the hammer-thrower replied, ignoring the point in Bob’s last words. “I don’t know if anything will be discovered missing here or not, but if there is—?”
“Things will be discovered missing, all right,” returned Bob. “What was that you dropped out of the window in my room last night?”
“Things are definitely going to be missing,” Bob replied. “What was it that you dropped out of the window in my room last night?”
The hammer-thrower stared at him. “I?—your room?” he said at length very slowly, with the most genuine amazement written all over his serious reliable features.
The hammer thrower looked at him. “Me?—your room?” he said finally, slowly, with genuine surprise all over his serious, trustworthy face.
“You! My room!” repeated Bob. “You didn’t expect me to come back. I gave you quite a surprise, didn’t I? You are certainly some sprinter.”
“You! My room!” Bob repeated. “You didn’t think I’d come back. I really surprised you, didn’t I? You’re definitely a fast runner.”
Still the hammer-thrower continued to stare. “Mad!” he said at last. “I hardly credited it before, but now—That private sanatorium!—No doubt, it was best.”
Still the hammer-thrower kept staring. “Crazy!” he finally said. “I barely believed it before, but now—That private sanatorium!—No doubt, it was the right choice.”
Bob laughed. “That sanatorium fits in fine, doesn’t it? You’ll be trying the little abduction act next, yourself, I suppose.”
Bob laughed. “That sanatorium looks great, doesn’t it? I guess you’ll be trying a little abduction act next, huh?”
“I’m trying to make up my mind whether you aren’t really a dangerous person to be at large,” said the hammer-man heavily. “You might say something like that to some one else. You appear absolutely irresponsible.”
“I’m trying to decide if you’re actually a dangerous person to be out here,” said the hammer-man seriously. “You could say something like that to someone else. You seem completely reckless.”
“I might,” observed Bob tentatively. Oh, if he only could!
“I might,” Bob said unsurely. Oh, if he only could!
“However, I hardly think you will,” remarked the other in his heaviest manner. “By the way, you play pretty good billiards.”
“However, I hardly think you will,” the other replied in a serious tone. “By the way, you play billiards really well.”
“Thanks awfully. Want to play?”
“Thanks a lot. Want to play?”
“Don’t mind.” And the hammer-thrower took down a cue.
“Don't worry about it.” And the hammer-thrower picked up a cue.
“I should dearly like to beat you,” said Bob in wistful tones.
“I really want to beat you,” said Bob with a longing tone.
“And I should as dearly like not to be beaten by you, or any one else,” returned the other.
“And I really wouldn't want to be beaten by you or anyone else,” replied the other.
“I know,” conceded Bob, not without a touch of admiration, “you’re a great chap for winning prizes and things. You’ve taken no end of cups, haven’t you? I mean, legitimately.”
“I know,” admitted Bob, with a hint of admiration, “you really are remarkable at winning awards and such. You've racked up a ton of trophies, haven’t you? I mean, the legit ones.”
“Yes; I usually go in to win.” The other professed not to hear Bob’s last words.
“Yes; I usually go in to win.” The other claimed not to hear Bob’s last words.
“And you’ve been feted some, in consequence, too, haven’t you?” said Bob suddenly. “You were at the Duke of Somberland’s, I remember.” Meaningly. He remembered, too, that articles of great value had disappeared from the duke’s place at the same time.
“And you’ve been celebrated a bit because of that, right?” Bob said suddenly. “You were at the Duke of Somberland’s, if I recall.” He emphasized his point. He also remembered that valuable items had gone missing from the duke’s place around the same time.
“I believe I was. Met no end of interesting people!”
“I think I was. I met so many interesting people!”
“And weren’t you at Lord Tumford’s?” Bob recalled reading how jewels had mysteriously vanished in the case of Lord Tumford’s guests, also.
“And weren’t you at Lord Tumford’s?” Bob remembered reading about how jewels had mysteriously disappeared among Lord Tumford’s guests, too.
“Yes, got asked over for the shooting. Believe I did very well for an American not accustomed to the British method of slaughter.”
“Yes, I was invited to the shooting. I think I did pretty well for an American who isn’t used to the British style of hunting.”
“No doubt,” said Bob. The hammer-thrower was getting bigger in his way every moment. Now he had become an operator of international importance.
“No doubt,” said Bob. The hammer thrower was becoming more significant in his path every moment. Now he had become an operator of international importance.
“Speaking about winning, you were on the losing team at college, weren’t you?” he observed significantly.
“Speaking of winning, you were on the losing team in college, right?” he noted meaningfully.
“Quite so!” answered Bob. “We worked awfully hard and ought to have won, but fate, I guess, was against us.”
“Exactly!” replied Bob. “We worked really hard and should have won, but I guess fate was against us.”
“We,” said the hammer-man in his ponderous way, “are fate. Arbiters of our destinies! We succeed, or we don’t. And when we fail, it is we that fail. Fate hasn’t anything to do with it.”
“We,” said the hammer-man in his heavy way, “are fate. We control our own destinies! We either succeed, or we don’t. And when we fail, it’s on us. Fate has nothing to do with it.”
“Maybe you’re right,” assented Bob. “I don’t know. Anyhow, it’s a test of true sportsmanship to know how to lose.”
“Maybe you’re right,” Bob agreed. “I don’t know. Anyway, it’s a true test of sportsmanship to know how to lose.”
“Not to whine, you mean? True. But it’s better not to lose. Now go ahead and try to beat me.”
“Not to complain, you mean? True. But it’s better not to lose. Now go ahead and try to beat me.”
Bob tried his best. He let the other name the game and the number of points, and for a time it was nip and tuck. Once Bob ran a string of seventy. Then the hammer-thrower made one hundred and one. His playing was brilliant. Some of the heaviness seemed to have departed from his big frame. His steps nearly matched Bob’s for litheness while his big fingers handled the cue almost daintily. All the inner force of the man seemed focused on the task of winning. He had made up his mind he couldn’t lose. Bob was equally determined, too, not to lose.
Bob gave it his all. He let the other person choose the game and set the points, and for a while, it was a close contest. Then Bob scored a string of seventy. After that, the hammer-thrower hit one hundred and one. His playing was exceptional. Some of the weight seemed to have lifted from his large frame. His movements nearly matched Bob’s in grace, while his large fingers handled the cue with surprising finesse. All his inner strength was focused on the goal of winning. He was convinced he couldn’t lose. Bob was equally determined not to lose, either.
The game seemed symbolical of that bigger game they were playing as adversaries, and more and more Bob realized here was an opponent not to be despised. He was resourceful, delicate, subtle, as he permitted Bob now to gaze behind that shield of heaviness. He had never before exhibited his real self at the table, playing heretofore in ponderous fashion, but this time, perhaps, he experienced a secret delight in tantalizing an enemy. Those big fingers seemed capable of administering a pretty hard squeeze when the hour arrived; they might even not hesitate at a death-clutch. The game now was very close.
The game felt like a representation of the larger competition they were engaged in as rivals, and Bob increasingly realized that this was an opponent he shouldn't underestimate. He was clever, nuanced, and, as he allowed Bob to look past that heavy façade, it became clear. He had never shown his true self at the table before, playing heavily in the past, but this time, perhaps, he found a hidden thrill in teasing his adversary. Those large fingers seemed capable of delivering a strong grip when the moment came; they might even be unafraid of a final, tight hold. The game was now very tight.
“Shall we make it a thousand for the winner?” suggested the hammer-thrower.
“Shall we make it a thousand for the winner?” suggested the hammer thrower.
“Haven’t that much,” said Bob. “Only got about seven dollars and a half, or so.”
“Haven’t that much,” said Bob. “I’ve only got about seven and a half dollars, or so.”
“I’ll bet you seven dollars and a half, then.”
“I'll bet you seven dollars and fifty cents, then.”
Bob accepted, and immediately had a run of luck. He was within two points of being out. The hammer-thrower had about fifty to go.
Bob agreed, and right away, he got lucky. He was just two points away from being out. The hammer-thrower had about fifty left to go.
“Get that seven dollars and a half ready,” he said easily as he began his play.
“Get that seven and a half dollars ready,” he said casually as he started his game.
“Maybe I shan’t have to,” replied Bob.
“Maybe I won’t have to,” replied Bob.
“Yes, you will.” He spoke as one not capable of making mistakes about what he could do. And he didn’t make a mistake this time. He ran out. Bob paid with as good grace as he could. Then the hammer-thrower moved heavily away and left Bob alone.
“Yes, you will.” He spoke confidently, without doubt about his abilities. And this time, he was right. He ran out. Bob accepted the situation as best as he could. Then the hammer-thrower moved away and left Bob by himself.
The latter didn’t feel quite so jubilant now over his secret knowledge as he had a little earlier. The hammer-thrower had permitted him to test his mettle—indeed, he had deliberately put himself out to do so, and make Bob realize even more thoroughly that he might just about as well not know anything for all the good it would do him (Bob). His lips might as well be sealed, as far as his being able to prove anything; if he did speak, people would answer as the hammer-thrower had. “Mad!” Or worse! That sanatorium incident was certainly unfortunate.
The latter didn't feel as joyful about his secret knowledge now as he had just a little while ago. The hammer-thrower had let him test his limits—he had even gone out of his way to do so, making Bob realize even more clearly that it might be better if he didn't know anything at all, considering how little good it would do him. Bob's lips might as well be sealed when it comes to proving anything; if he did speak, people would respond just like the hammer-thrower had. “Mad!” Or worse! That sanatorium incident was definitely unfortunate.
Bob put his hand in his pocket to get his handkerchief to wipe a few drops of perspiration from his brow. He drew out his handkerchief, but he also drew out something else—something hard—that glittered-a ring—a beautiful one—with perfect blue white diamonds—a ring he remembered having seen on certain occasions adorning one of Miss Gerald’s fingers.
Bob reached into his pocket to grab his handkerchief and wipe some sweat off his forehead. He pulled out his handkerchief, but he also pulled out something else—something hard and shiny—a ring—a stunning one—with flawless blue-white diamonds—a ring he recalled seeing on Miss Gerald’s finger on certain occasions.
Bob stared at it. He stood like one frozen to the spot. That hammer-man had done more than beat him at billiards. While he (Bob) had extended a portion of his person over the table to execute difficult shots the other had found it an easy trick to slip Miss Gerald’s ring in the coat-tail pocket of Bob’s garment. Could you exceed that for diabolical intention? Now what on earth was Bob to do with Miss Gerald’s ring?
Bob stared at it. He stood there frozen. That guy had done more than just beat him at billiards. While Bob had leaned over the table to make some tricky shots, the other guy had easily slipped Miss Gerald’s ring into the pocket of Bob’s coat. Could anything be more malicious than that? Now what on earth was Bob supposed to do with Miss Gerald’s ring?
He couldn’t keep it and yet he didn’t want to throw away her property. It seemed as if he would be forced to, though. After an instant’s hesitation he made up his mind that he would toss it out of the window and then write her anonymously where it could be found. The hammer-man hadn’t calculated Bob would discover it on his person so soon, or perhaps he had told himself the odds were against Bob’s discovering it at all. He would, of course, have preferred that others should discover it on Bob. The latter now strode to the window; the glittering ring seemed fairly to burn his fingers. He raised the curtain as softly as he could—the window was already open—and then suddenly started back.
He couldn’t keep it, but he didn’t want to throw away her stuff either. It looked like he’d have to, though. After a brief pause, he decided he would toss it out the window and then anonymously let her know where to find it. The hammer-man hadn’t anticipated that Bob would find it on him so quickly, or maybe he figured the chances of Bob discovering it at all were low. He would, of course, have preferred that someone else find it on Bob. Bob then walked over to the window; the shiny ring felt like it was burning his fingers. He lifted the curtain as quietly as he could—the window was already open—and then suddenly stepped back.
The light from within, shining on the garden, revealed to him with disconcerting abruptness a man’s face. The man sprang back with considerable celerity, but not before Bob had recognized in him that confounded maniac-medico. He had tracked Bob here, but not wishing to create a scene among Mrs. Ralston’s guests, was no doubt waiting outside with his assistants and the first time Bob stepped out of the house, he expected to nab him. All the while Bob had been playing billiards, that miserable maniac-medico had probably been spying upon him, peeping from under the curtain.
The light from inside, shining on the garden, suddenly revealed a man’s face to him. The man quickly stepped back, but not before Bob realized it was that crazy doctor. He had followed Bob here, but not wanting to cause a scene among Mrs. Ralston’s guests, he was likely waiting outside with his assistants. The moment Bob stepped out of the house, he figured he would try to catch him. While Bob had been playing billiards, that miserable doctor had probably been watching him, peering from behind the curtain.
Bob moved from the window, the ring still in his fingers, and at this inopportune moment, the monocle-man walked in. He seemed to have timed his coming to a nicety. Perhaps he had noticed that little episode at the window. Bob, in a panic, thrust the ring hurriedly into his waistcoat pocket and tried to face the other without showing undue agitation, but he feared guilt was written all over his countenance.
Bob stepped away from the window, the ring still in his fingers, and at that awkward moment, the monocle guy walked in. He seemed to have arrived just at the right time. Maybe he had seen that little scene at the window. Bob, in a panic, quickly shoved the ring into his waistcoat pocket and tried to act normal in front of the other man, but he was worried that guilt was all over his face.
“Hot,” muttered Bob. “Thought a breath of fresh air would do me good.”
“Hot,” muttered Bob. “I thought a breath of fresh air would help me feel better.”
“Quite so. We English believe in plenty of fresh air,” returned the monocle-man, just as if he swallowed the reason the other had given for going to the window.
“Absolutely. We English are all about getting a lot of fresh air,” replied the man with the monocle, as if he fully accepted the reason the other person had for wanting to go to the window.
But after that Bob couldn’t get rid of him. It was as if he knew something was wrong and that Bob needed watching. He began to fool with the balls, telling how hard it was for him to get accustomed to these small American tables. The British game was far better, he went on, all the while keeping his eyes pretty closely on Bob, until the latter got desperate and went back to where people were. But the monocle-man went, too. By this time Bob was convinced the other knew what was in his pocket. “Caught with the goods!” That’s the way the yellow press would describe his predicament.
But after that, Bob couldn’t shake him off. It felt like he knew something was off and that Bob needed to be watched. He started messing with the balls, complaining about how difficult it was for him to get used to these small American tables. The British game was way better, he kept saying, all while keeping a close eye on Bob, until Bob got desperate and retreated to where the others were. But the monocle guy followed him. By then, Bob was sure the guy knew what was in his pocket. “Caught with the goods!” That’s how the tabloid press would describe his situation.
“Aren’t you the regular hermit-crab?” It was the temperamental little thing’s reproachful voice that at this point broke in upon his sorrowful meditations, and Bob turned to her quickly. At the moment he was awfully glad she had come up. “What have you been doing?” she went on.
“Aren’t you just the usual hermit crab?” It was the temperamental little creature’s reproachful tone that interrupted his gloomy thoughts, and Bob turned to her quickly. At that moment, he was really glad she had come over. “What have you been up to?” she continued.
“Oh, just rolling the balls. Will you dance?” Eagerly.
“Oh, just rolling the balls. Are you going to dance?” Eagerly.
“Can’t! Engaged. You should have asked me sooner and not run away.” Then perhaps she saw how disappointed Bob looked or caught that desperate expression in his eyes, for she added: “Yes, I will. Can say I was engaged to you first and forgot. Come on.”
“Can’t! I'm engaged. You should have asked me sooner instead of running away.” Then maybe she noticed how disappointed Bob looked or saw that desperate look in his eyes, because she added: “Yes, I will. I can say I was engaged to you first and forgot. Let’s go.”
Bob did. He was a little afraid the monocle-man might not let him, but the other permitted him to dance. Perhaps he wouldn’t have done so if he had known what was in Bob’s mind. That young man felt as if he had now truly reached his last ditch.
Bob did. He was a bit worried that the monocle guy might not let him, but the other guy allowed him to dance. Maybe he wouldn't have done that if he had known what Bob was really thinking. That young man felt like he had finally hit rock bottom.
“Say, I’m in an awful hole,” he breathed to the temperamental little thing, as they glided over the floor.
“Hey, I’m in a really bad spot,” he said to the moody little thing, as they glided across the floor.
“Are you?” She snuggled closer. “Anything worse than has been?”
“Are you?” She cuddled closer. “Is there anything worse than what’s already happened?”
“A heap worse! I’ve got something I simply must get rid of.”
“A lot worse! I have something I really need to get rid of.”
“What is it?” she said in a thrilling whisper.
“What is it?” she asked in an exciting whisper.
“A ring.” Hoarsely.
“A ring.” Raspy.
“No. Whose?”
“No. Whose is it?”
“Miss Gerald’s.” More hoarsely still.
“Miss Gerald’s.” Even more hoarsely.
“How wildly exciting! Though I didn’t think you would rob her.” In an odd voice.
“How wildly exciting! Though I didn’t think you would steal from her.” In a strange voice.
“I didn’t.”
"I didn't."
“But you say you’ve got her ring?”
“But you say you have her ring?”
“Some one put it in my pocket.”
“Someone put it in my pocket.”
“Isn’t it the funny little hermit-crab, though!” she answered.
“Isn’t it the funny little hermit crab, though!” she replied.
“Well, never mind whether you believe me or not. The point is, I’ve got to get rid of it and I can’t. That monocle-man is watching me. I need help.”
“Well, it doesn’t matter if you believe me or not. The point is, I need to get rid of it and I can’t. That monocle guy is watching me. I need help.”
“Mine?” Snuggling once more.
"Mine?" Snuggling again.
“Yours. Will you do it?”
"Yours. Will you do this?"
“Didn’t I tell you I’d go through fire and water for you? Am I not now your eternal and everlasting chum? Say it.”
“Didn’t I say I’d go through anything for you? Am I not now your forever friend? Just say it.”
“What?”
“Wait, what?”
“That jolly-little-pal talk.”
“That cheerful friend talk.”
“Jolly little pal!” he breathed in her ear.
“Cheerful little friend!” he whispered in her ear.
She sighed happily. “Now what do you want me to do?”
She smiled contentedly. “So, what do you want me to do now?”
“I want you to take this ring”—slipping it into her fingers—“and return it to Miss Gerald’s room. You can slip in without attracting any attention. Besides no one would think anything of your going in her room, even if you were seen doing so—you’re such friends.”
“I want you to take this ring”—slipping it into her fingers—“and return it to Miss Gerald’s room. You can go in without drawing any attention. Plus, nobody would think anything of you going into her room, even if someone saw you—you're such good friends.”
“But,” she said wonderingly, “I don’t see why you took it at all if—” She broke off—“Unless that monocle-man knows you’ve got it on you?”
“But,” she said in amazement, “I don’t understand why you took it at all if—” She paused—“Unless that guy with the monocle knows you have it on you?”
“That’s the point,” observed Bob hoarsely.
"That’s the point," Bob said hoarsely.
“All right,” she assented. “I’ll do it. When?”
“All right,” she agreed. “I’ll do it. When?”
“Now.”
“Right now.”
“No,” she said firmly. “Not until our dance is over. I want every bit of it. That’s—that’s my salary. My! I feel awful wicked with that ring in my hand. You can take a firmer hold of me if you want—the way you did that first day! I need reassuring!”
“No,” she said firmly. “Not until our dance is over. I want every bit of it. That’s— that’s my salary. Wow! I feel really wicked with that ring in my hand. You can hold me tighter if you want—like you did that first day! I need some reassurance!”
Bob laughed in spite of himself, but he reassured “jolly little pal,” in the manner indicated.
Bob laughed despite himself, but he reassured his “jolly little pal” in the way that was suggested.
“Now just fly around,” she said.
“Now just fly around,” she said.
And Bob “flew” with a recklessness that satisfied even her. When it was over she turned to him with an odd look.
And Bob "flew" with a wildness that even impressed her. When it was done, she looked at him with a strange expression.
“I’ve got another condition.”
“I have another condition.”
“What is it?”
"What's that?"
“That you ask Miss Gerald to dance!”
“That you ask Miss Gerald to dance!”
“But—” he began, disconcerted as well as surprised.
"But—" he started, feeling both confused and surprised.
“That’s the condition.”
"That's the requirement."
“She would only refuse.” Gloomily.
“She would just refuse.” Gloomily.
“Do you agree?” There was something almost wistful in the temperamental eyes of little pal at that moment.
“Do you agree?” There was something almost nostalgic in the emotional eyes of my little friend at that moment.
“I—can’t.” Desperately.
"I can't." Desperately.
“Very well. Take back the—”
“Okay. Take back the—”
“All right. I will,” Bob half-groaned.
“All right. I will,” Bob said with a groan.
As he walked over toward Gwendoline Gerald, he saw the temperamental little thing moving toward the stairway. Half-way up, she stopped and looked back over the banister. Perhaps she wanted to see if Bob was fulfilling his part of the contract.
As he walked over to Gwendoline Gerald, he saw the feisty little thing heading toward the staircase. About halfway up, she paused and turned back to look over the banister. Maybe she wanted to check if Bob was keeping his end of the deal.
CHAPTER XIX—BOB FORGETS HIMSELF
“Miss Gerald,” said Bob as formally as if he were quoting from one of those deportment books, “may I have the pleasure of this dance?”
“Miss Gerald,” Bob said as formally as if he were quoting from one of those etiquette books, “may I have the pleasure of this dance?”
Her reply was at variance with what “How to Behave in the Best Society” taught young ladies to say. “Why do you ask?” said Gwendoline Gerald quietly.
Her response was different from what "How to Behave in the Best Society" advised young women to say. “Why do you ask?” Gwendoline Gerald said quietly.
“Got to,” said Bob.
"Have to," said Bob.
“Why have you got to?”
"Why do you have to?"
“I promised I would.”
"I said I would."
“Who made you promise?”
“Who asked you to promise?”
Bob told.
Bob spoke.
“Do you have to do what she tells you?”
“Do you really have to do what she says?”
“In this instance.”
“In this case.”
“Of course you know what my reply will be?”
“Of course you know what I'm going to say?”
“I told her you would refuse.”
“I told her you would say no.”
“You would hardly expect me to dance with you after all I know about you, would you?” There was still that deadly quietness in her tones.
“You wouldn’t really expect me to dance with you after everything I know about you, right?” There was still that chilling calmness in her voice.
“All you think you know about me,” Bob had the courage to correct her. “Of course not.”
“All you think you know about me,” Bob had the nerve to correct her. “Definitely not.”
“Some one has taken one of my rings,” observed Miss Gerald even more quietly.
“Someone has taken one of my rings,” Miss Gerald said even more quietly.
“I haven’t got it,” exclaimed Bob. “Honest!” Wasn’t he glad he had got rid of it?
“I don’t have it,” Bob said. “Seriously!” Wasn’t he glad he had gotten rid of it?
The violet eyes studied Bob as if he were something strange and inanimate—an odd kind of a pebble or a shell. “You are sure?” said Miss Gwendoline.
The violet eyes examined Bob as if he were something bizarre and lifeless—like a weird pebble or shell. “Are you sure?” asked Miss Gwendoline.
“Positive,” answered Bob in his most confident tones. He remembered now that during his dance with the jolly little pal he had observed the monocle-man talking with Miss Gerald. Perhaps he had told her he had seen the ring in Bob’s fingers when the latter had gone to the window. The monocle-man might have been spying all the while, on the other side. There might have been two Peeping Toms interested in Bob’s actions in the billiard room.
“Definitely,” Bob replied in his most confident tone. He now recalled that during his dance with the cheerful little friend, he had seen the monocle guy chatting with Miss Gerald. Maybe he had mentioned seeing the ring on Bob’s fingers when Bob had gone to the window. The monocle guy might have been watching him the whole time from the other side. There could have been two Peeping Toms curious about Bob’s actions in the billiard room.
“Are you so positive you would be willing to submit to be searched?”
“Are you really sure you would agree to being searched?”
“I am that positive,” Bob answered. And then went on more eagerly: “Maybe you haven’t really lost it after all.” He could say that and still tell the truth. “Why, it may be in your room now. You may find it on your table or your dresser when you go upstairs to retire.”
“I’m absolutely sure,” Bob replied. Then he added more enthusiastically, “Maybe you haven’t actually lost it after all.” He could say that and still be honest. “It might be in your room right now. You could find it on your table or your dresser when you go upstairs to bed.”
Miss Gerald looked at him. “You seem to be rather certain?” she said tentatively.
Miss Gerald looked at him. “You seem pretty sure?” she said cautiously.
“I am,” said Bob. “I’d almost swear—” He stopped suddenly. It wouldn’t do to be too certain.
“I am,” said Bob. “I’d almost swear—” He stopped abruptly. It wouldn’t be wise to be too certain.
“Don’t you find your own words rather strange?” the girl asked.
“Don’t you think your own words are kind of weird?” the girl asked.
“Everything’s funny about me, nowadays,” said Bob.
“Everything’s funny about me these days,” said Bob.
“Did you enjoy renewing your acquaintance with Miss ——?” She called Gee-gee by that other, more conventional name.
“Did you like reconnecting with Miss ——?” She referred to Gee-gee by that other, more traditional name.
“I did not. I dislike her profoundly.”
“I didn't. I really dislike her.”
“Are you sure?” The violet eyes were almost meditative. “Now I should have thought—” She paused. Bob read the thought, however. A man like him was on a plane with Gee-gee; indeed, much lower. Miss Gerald would be finding in Gee-gee Bob’s affinity next.
“Are you sure?” The violet eyes looked almost thoughtful. “Now I should have thought—” She paused. Bob picked up on her thoughts, though. A man like him was on a different level from Gee-gee; in fact, much lower. Miss Gerald would soon realize that Bob had a connection with Gee-gee next.
“You haven’t refused me out-and-out, yet,” he suggested. “To dance, I mean.”
“You haven’t outright refused me yet,” he suggested. “To dance, I mean.”
“You would rather, of course, I did refuse you?”
“You would, of course, prefer that I refuse you?”
“Of course,” Bob stammered. The mere thought of dancing with her once again as of yore gave him a sensation of exquisite pain. But naturally she would never dream of dancing with one she considered a—?
“Of course,” Bob stammered. The mere thought of dancing with her again like they used to gave him a feeling of intense pain. But of course, she would never think of dancing with someone she saw as a—?
“Well, you may have the pleasure,” she said mockingly.
“Well, you can enjoy that,” she said mockingly.
Bob could not credit his hearing. She would permit him to touch her. Incredible! A great awe fell over him. He could not believe.
Bob couldn't believe his ears. She was actually letting him touch her. Unbelievable! He was filled with a deep sense of awe. It felt unreal.
“I said you might have the pleasure,” she repeated, accenting in the least the last word.
“I said you might get the pleasure,” she repeated, emphasizing the last word just a little.
Bob caught that accent. Ah, she knew then, what exquisite pain it would be for him to dance with her! She was purposely punishing him; she wished to make him suffer. She would drive a gimlet in his heart and turn it around. Bob somehow got his arm about his divinity and found himself floating around the room, experiencing that dual sensation of being in heaven and in the other place at one and the same time.
Bob picked up that accent. Ah, she realized then how incredibly painful it would be for him to dance with her! She was intentionally tormenting him; she wanted him to hurt. She would jab a sharp pain in his heart and twist it around. Bob somehow got his arm around his goddess and found himself gliding around the room, feeling that mixed emotion of being in heaven and in hell all at once.
It was a weird and wonderful dance. Through it all he kept looking down at her hair, though its brightness seemed to dazzle him. Miss Dolly had confided to Bob that he “guided divinely,” but he didn’t guide divinely now; he was too bewildered. Once he bumped his divinity into some one and this did not improve his mental condition. But she bore with him with deadly patience; she was bound to punish him thoroughly, it seemed.
It was a strange and amazing dance. Throughout it all, he kept glancing down at her hair, even though its brilliance seemed to mesmerize him. Miss Dolly had told Bob that he "led beautifully," but he wasn't leading beautifully now; he was too confused. Once, he accidentally bumped into someone, and that didn’t help his state of mind. But she dealt with him with a relentless patience; it seemed she was determined to make him pay.
Then that dual sensation in Bob’s breast began gradually to partake more of heaven than of the other place, and he yielded to the pure and unadulterated joy of the divinity’s propinquity. He forgot there was a big black blot on his escutcheon, or character. He ceased to remember he was a renegade and criminal. The nearness of the proud golden head set his heart singing until tempestuously and temerariously he flung three words at her, telepathically, from the throbbing depths of his soul.
Then that mixed feeling in Bob’s chest started to feel more heavenly than hellish, and he surrendered to the pure joy of being close to the divine. He forgot about the major stain on his reputation. He stopped remembering that he was a traitor and a criminal. The closeness of the proud golden head made his heart sing, and boldly and recklessly, he sent three words to her, telepathically, from the deepest part of his soul.
The dance ending abruptly “brought him to.” He looked around rather dazed; then struggling to awake, gazed at her. Her face still wore that expression of deadly calm and pride. Bob didn’t understand. She was no statue, he would have sworn, yet now she looked one—for him. And a moment before she had seemed radiantly, gloriously alive—no Galatea before the awakening! It was as if she had felt all the vibrating joy of the dance. But that, of course, could not have been. Bob felt like rubbing his eyes when he regarded her. He did not understand unless—
The dance ended suddenly and “brought him back to reality.” He looked around, a bit confused; then, trying to wake up, he stared at her. Her face still showed that expression of icy calm and pride. Bob didn’t get it. She was no statue, he would have sworn, yet now she looked like one—to him. Just a moment before, she had seemed vibrantly, gloriously alive—no Galatea before the awakening! It was as if she had felt all the pulsing joy of the dance. But that, of course, couldn’t have been true. Bob felt like he needed to rub his eyes when he looked at her. He didn’t get it unless—
She wished once more to “rub it in,” to make him realize again more poignantly all that he had lost. She let him have a fuller glimpse of heaven just to hurl him from it. She liked to see him go plunging down into the dark voids of despair. He yielded entirely to that descending feeling now; he couldn’t help it.
She wanted to “rub it in” once again, to make him painfully aware of everything he had lost. She let him see a more complete view of paradise just to push him from it. She enjoyed watching him fall into the deep emptiness of despair. He was completely consumed by that sinking feeling now; he couldn’t help it.
“I thank you,” said Bob, in his best deportment-book manner.
“I appreciate it,” said Bob, in his most polite way.
The enigmatic violet eyes lighted as they rested on him. Bob would have sworn it was a cruel light. “Oh,” she said, “as long as you are a guest—? There are certain formalities—”
The mysterious violet eyes brightened when they landed on him. Bob could have sworn it was a harsh light. “Oh,” she said, “as long as you're a guest—? There are some formalities—”
“I understand,” he returned.
"I get it," he replied.
The light in the violet eyes deepened and sparkled. So a cruel Roman lady might have regarded a gladiator in the arena, answering his appeal with “Thumbs down.” Bob lifted his hand to his brow. The girl’s proud lips—lips to dream of—were curved as in cruel disdain. Then Bob forgot himself again.
The light in her violet eyes grew deeper and sparkled. It was the same way a ruthless Roman woman might have looked at a gladiator in the arena, responding to his plea with “Thumbs down.” Bob raised his hand to his forehead. The girl’s proud lips—lips anyone would dream of—curved into a cruel smirk. Then Bob lost himself again.
“I won’t have you look at me like that,” he said masterfully. “I’m not a criminal. Confound it, it’s preposterous. I didn’t steal your ring and I want you to know it, too. I never stole a thing in my life.” They were standing somewhat apart, where they couldn’t be overheard. He spoke in a low tone but with force, gazing boldly and unafraid now into the violet eyes.
“I won’t let you look at me like that,” he said confidently. “I’m not a criminal. Seriously, it’s ridiculous. I didn’t steal your ring, and I want you to understand that. I’ve never stolen anything in my life.” They stood a bit apart, where they couldn’t be overheard. He spoke quietly but firmly, looking boldly and without fear into the violet eyes.
“I won’t let you think that of me,” he said, stepping nearer. “Steal from you?” he scoffed. “Do you know the only thing I’d like to steal from you?” His eyes challenged hers; the violet eyes didn’t shrink. “Yourself! I’d like to steal you, but hang your rings!” He didn’t say “hang”; he used the other word. He forgot himself completely.
“I won’t let you think that about me,” he said, stepping closer. “Steal from you?” he laughed. “Do you know the only thing I’d want to take from you?” His eyes challenged hers; the violet eyes didn’t back down. “You! I’d like to take you, but forget your rings!” He didn’t say “forget”; he used a different word. He completely lost himself.
A garden of wild roses blossomed on the girl’s fair cheek, but she held herself with rare composure. “I wonder, Mr. Bennett,” she observed quietly, “how I should answer such mad irresponsible talk?”
A garden of wild roses blossomed on the girl’s fair cheek, but she maintained a rare calmness. “I wonder, Mr. Bennett,” she said quietly, “how I should respond to such crazy, irresponsible talk?”
“It’s the truth. And if I were a thief—which I’m not—I wouldn’t steal your rings. Even a thief wouldn’t steal the rings of the girl he loves.”
“It’s the truth. And if I were a thief—which I’m not—I wouldn’t steal your rings. Even a thief wouldn’t steal the rings of the girl he loves.”
More roses! Outraged flushing, no doubt! Yet still the girl managed to maintain her composure. “You dare go very far, do you not, Mr. Bennett?”
More roses! She must be furious! Yet the girl still kept her cool. “You really think you can go that far, don’t you, Mr. Bennett?”
“Yes; and I’ll go further. I love every hair of your head. Even when you’re cruel,” he hurried on recklessly, “and heaven knows you can be cruel enough, I love you. I love your lips when they say the unkindest and most outrageous things to me. I love your eyes when they look scorn. I ought not to love you, but I do. Why, I loved you the first time I saw you. And do you think if I were all those things you think me, I’d dare stand up here and tell you that? I didn’t mean to tell you ever that I loved you. But that’s my answer when you imply I’m a rank criminal. A man’s got to have a clear conscience to love you as I do. Such love can only go with a clear conscience. Why, you’re so wonderful and beautiful to me I couldn’t—” Bob paused. “Don’t you see the point?” he appealed to her. “A man couldn’t have you in his heart and not have the right to hold up his head among his fellow men.”
"Yes, and I’ll go even further. I love every strand of your hair. Even when you’re being cruel,” he rushed on recklessly, “and heaven knows you can be really cruel, I love you. I love your lips when they say the harshest and most outrageous things to me. I love your eyes when they’re filled with disdain. I shouldn’t love you, but I do. I loved you the moment I first saw you. And do you think if I were all those things you believe I am, I’d have the nerve to stand here and tell you that? I never meant to admit I loved you. But that’s my response when you suggest I’m a total criminal. A man has to have a clear conscience to love you like I do. Such love can only come with a clear conscience. You’re so amazing and beautiful to me I couldn’t—” Bob paused. “Don’t you see the point?” he pleaded with her. “A man couldn’t have you in his heart and not have the right to hold his head high among his peers.”
Miss Gerald did not at once answer; she had not moved. The sweeping dark lashes were lowered; she was looking down. “You plead your cause very ingeniously, Mr. Bennett,” she observed at length, her lashes suddenly uplifting. The lights were still there in the violet eyes; they seemed yet mocking him. “You invoke the sacred name of love as a proof of your innocence. The argument is unique if not logical,” she went on with pitiless accents and the red lips that uttered the “sacred name of love” smiled. “I have been rather interested, however, in following your somewhat fantastic defense of yourself. That it has incidentally involved me is also mildly interesting. Do you expect me to feel flattered?” The red lips still smiled. Bob was quite near but she didn’t move away. She seemed quite unafraid of him.
Miss Gerald didn’t respond right away; she didn’t move. Her long dark lashes were lowered as she looked down. “You make your case very cleverly, Mr. Bennett,” she finally said, her lashes lifting suddenly. The lights were still present in her violet eyes; they seemed to mock him. “You call upon the sacred name of love as a proof of your innocence. It’s a unique argument, if not exactly logical,” she continued in a sharp tone, her red lips curling into a smile at the mention of the “sacred name of love.” “I have found your somewhat outlandish defense of yourself quite interesting to follow. The fact that it has also involved me is mildly intriguing. Do you expect me to feel flattered?” Her red lips still smiled. Bob was quite close, but she didn’t step away. She seemed completely unafraid of him.
“You needn’t feel ashamed,” said Bob sturdily. And his eyes flashed. They seemed to say no woman ought to be ashamed of an honest man’s love. “I may be mad over you,” he went on, “but I’m not ashamed of it. There isn’t a thought I have of you that doesn’t make me want to be a better man, and a stronger and more useful one, too,” he added, squaring his shoulders.
“You don’t have to feel ashamed,” Bob said firmly. And his eyes shone. They seemed to say that no woman should feel ashamed of an honest man’s love. “I might be crazy about you,” he continued, “but I’m not ashamed of it. Every thought I have of you makes me want to be a better man, and a stronger and more helpful one, too,” he added, straightening up his shoulders.
Again the long lashes swept slightly downward, masking the violet, and the girl’s lips moved—a ripple of amusement, no doubt. She looked up, however, once more with that appearance of deadly calm. “Then you deny it, in toto, having seen my ring to-night?”
Again the long lashes swept slightly downward, hiding the violet, and the girl’s lips moved—a hint of amusement, no doubt. She looked up, however, once more with that expression of complete calm. “So you deny it entirely, after seeing my ring tonight?”
Bob swallowed. Again he dropped from the heights.
Bob swallowed. Once more, he fell from the heights.
“You do not speak,” said Miss Gerald, studying him.
“You're quiet,” said Miss Gerald, looking him over.
“I—wish you wouldn’t ask me that,” he managed to say.
“I wish you wouldn’t ask me that,” he managed to say.
“Why not?” lifting her brows. “Even if you saw it you could say you hadn’t.”
“Why not?” she said, raising her eyebrows. “Even if you saw it, you could just say you didn’t.”
“That’s just the point,” Miserably. “I couldn’t.”
“That’s exactly the issue,” Miserably. “I couldn’t.”
“Then you did see it?”
"Did you see it then?"
“I did.”
"I did."
“You had it, perhaps?”
"Did you have it, maybe?"
“I did.”
“I did.”
“You have it now?”
"Do you have it now?"
“No.”
“Nope.”
“Ah, you have passed it on to an accomplice, perhaps.” Mockingly. Miss Gerald drew up her proud figure. “And this is the man,” she said, “who talks to me of love. Love!” With a low musical laugh. “The tenderest passion! The purest one! Dare you repeat now,” with crushing triumph in the violet eyes, “what you said a moment ago.”
“Ah, so you’ve handed it off to a partner in crime, maybe.” Sarcastically, Miss Gerald straightened her proud posture. “And this is the guy,” she said, “who talks to me about love. Love!” With a soft, melodic laugh. “The most delicate emotion! The most genuine one! How about you say again,” with victorious triumph in her violet eyes, “what you just said a moment ago.”
“I love you,” said Bob, with burning glance. “I shall carry your image with me to the grave.”
“I love you,” Bob said, his eyes full of passion. “I’ll take your memory with me to the grave.”
This slightly staggered even one of her regal young bearing. His tone was that of the master once more. No criminal in his look when he said that! Miss Gerald’s slender figure swayed in the least; her breast stirred. Bob put his handsome reckless face nearer. That was the way he answered her challenge. He wore his fighting look.
This slightly interrupted her royal demeanor. His tone was that of a master again. There was no sign of a criminal in his expression when he said that! Miss Gerald’s slim figure didn’t move an inch; her heart raced. Bob leaned in closer with his charming, reckless face. That was how he responded to her challenge. He had that determined look.
“I love you,” he said. “And that,” he flung at her, “is still the answer I dare make.”
“I love you,” he said. “And that,” he threw at her, “is still the answer I’m willing to give.”
Miss Gerald did not reply to this bold defiance at once. How she would have answered, Bob never knew, for at that moment the hammer-thrower came up and the girl at once turned to him, looking slightly paler as she did so. Both then walked away, Bob’s somber gaze following them. But he was not long permitted even this mournful privilege.
Miss Gerald didn't respond to this bold challenge right away. How she would have answered, Bob never found out, because at that moment the hammer-thrower approached, and the girl immediately turned to him, looking a bit pale as she did. They both walked away, and Bob's gloomy gaze followed them. But he wasn't allowed to enjoy even that sad privilege for long.
“Phone, sir,” said a voice at his elbow. “Mr. Robert Bennett is urgently wanted on the phone.”
“Phone, sir,” said a voice next to him. “Mr. Robert Bennett is needed urgently on the phone.”
“All right.” And Bob followed the servant. “What now?” he asked himself wearily.
“All right.” And Bob followed the servant. “What now?” he asked himself tiredly.
The voice at the other end was Dan’s. Fortunately the telephone was isolated and no one in the house could catch what Bob said. The good old commodore frantically wished to know all about Gee-gee and Gid-up. He had heard that Bob had got out of the sanatorium and gone back to Mrs. Ralston’s. Dan’s desire for information was greater even than his resentment toward Bob, as he had stooped to calling him up.
The voice on the other end was Dan’s. Thankfully, the phone was in a private area and no one in the house could hear what Bob said. The old commodore was eagerly wanting to know everything about Gee-gee and Gid-up. He had heard that Bob had left the sanatorium and returned to Mrs. Ralston’s. Dan’s need for information was even stronger than his annoyance toward Bob, since he had gone so far as to call him.
Bob obliged the commodore with such news as he could give. He told how he had tried unsuccessfully to sway Gee-gee and to show her the error of her ways; how she, however, seemed resolutely determined on her course of action and was not to be swayed. He related also that there was a legal light in the house.
Bob provided the commodore with all the news he could share. He explained how he had tried, but failed, to convince Gee-gee to reconsider her choices; she appeared firmly committed to her path and wouldn't be swayed. He also mentioned that there was a legal expert in the house.
At this point Dan’s remarks became explosive; it was like the Fourth of July at the other end of the line. Bob waited until the racket ceased and then he went on with further details, trying to be as conscientious and informing as possible. Finally he couldn’t think of anything more to say. But Dan thought of a lot—and some of it was personal, too. It didn’t ruffle Bob at all, however. It rolled off him like water off a duck’s back.
At this point, Dan's comments became intense; it was like the Fourth of July on the other end of the line. Bob waited until the noise died down and then continued with more details, trying to be as thorough and informative as possible. Eventually, he couldn't think of anything else to add. But Dan had plenty on his mind—and some of it was personal, too. It didn't bother Bob at all, though. It rolled off him like water off a duck's back.
“You’ll be arrested,” said Bob at last. “There’s a law against that kind of talk through telephones, you know.”
“You’ll get arrested,” Bob finally said. “There’s a law against that kind of talk over the phone, you know.”
“I’m afraid it’s all up,” moaned Dan.
“I'm afraid it's all over,” groaned Dan.
“’Fraid it is!” affirmed Bob. “How does Clarence take it?”
“I'm afraid it is!” confirmed Bob. “How is Clarence handling it?”
“He’s sitting here, all broke up.”
“He's sitting here, feeling completely broken.”
“Well, tell him to cheer up if he can,” said Bob. “Gid-up isn’t nearly so dangerous as Gee-gee. At least that’s my opinion.”
“Well, tell him to lighten up if he can,” said Bob. “Gid-up isn’t nearly as risky as Gee-gee. At least that’s how I see it.”
“Oh, isn’t she?” sneered Dan. And then there was some more Fourth of July at the other end of the line.
“Oh, isn’t she?” Dan mocked. And then there was more Fourth of July noise at the other end of the line.
Bob waited patiently for it to subside. “Is that all you wanted to talk with me about?” he asked at length.
Bob waited patiently for it to quiet down. “Is that everything you wanted to discuss with me?” he asked eventually.
“It is not,” snapped Dan. “Those confounded blankety-blank detectives, some blankety-blank idiot has employed as gardeners about Mrs. Ralston’s place, have arrested that-blankety-blank medical head of the private sanatorium.”
“It is not,” snapped Dan. “Those damn detectives that some idiot has hired as gardeners at Mrs. Ralston’s place have arrested that damn medical head of the private sanatorium.”
“What?” exclaimed Bob jubilantly.
“What?” Bob exclaimed excitedly.
“They found him prowling around. He tells the police-station man who he is, but the police-station man won’t believe him.”
“They found him wandering around. He tells the police station officer who he is, but the officer doesn’t believe him.”
“Ha! ha!” Bob was glad he could laugh once more, but it was Fourth of July again for Dan.
“Ha! ha!” Bob was happy he could laugh again, but it was Fourth of July for Dan once more.
“It isn’t any blankety-blank laughing matter,” he called back. “He’s one of my witnesses and I don’t want to lose him. Lost witnesses enough already!” Furiously.
“It’s not some ridiculous joke,” he called back. “He’s one of my witnesses and I don’t want to lose him. I’ve already lost enough witnesses!” Furiously.
“Well, why don’t you get him out?” said Bob with a gratified snicker.
“Hey, why don’t you just get him out?” Bob said with a satisfied chuckle.
“I tried to, but that blankety-blank station-house man is a blank bullet-head and the blankety detectives insist he shall be held, as they saw him looking through a window. What I want you to do is to come down to the village and help get him out.”
“I tried to, but that damn station-house guy is a complete idiot and the damn detectives insist on holding him, since they saw him looking through a window. What I want you to do is come down to the village and help get him out.”
“Me?” said Bob loftily. “Me help get him out?”
“Me?” Bob said arrogantly. “Me help get him out?”
“Yes, you can acknowledge he was after you, an escaped patient.”
“Yes, you can admit he was targeting you, an escaped patient.”
“Where is he now?” asked Bob.
“Where is he now?” Bob asked.
“Cell.”
"Cell."
“Well, you tell the station-man for me that he had better put him in a padded room. Ha! ha!” And Bob hung up the receiver.
"Well, you tell the station guy for me that he should probably put him in a padded room. Ha! ha!" And Bob hung up the phone.
But almost immediately the bell rang again.
But almost right away, the bell rang again.
“Hello!” said a voice. It was the telephone operator. “Is Mr. Bennett still there? Oh! Well, there’s a party on the long distance wants to speak to you.”
“Hello!” said a voice. It was the telephone operator. “Is Mr. Bennett still there? Oh! Well, there’s a long-distance call for you.”
“Hello; that you, Bob?” came in far-away accents.
“Hello, is that you, Bob?” came from a distance.
“It’s me. Who are you?”
“It’s me. Who are you?”
“Dad.”
“Dad.”
“Oh, hello, dad!” Bob tried to make his voice joyful.
“Oh, hey, dad!” Bob tried to sound cheerful.
“I called you up to tell you I caught a fifty-seven pounder. Thought you’d like to congratulate me.”
“I called you to let you know I caught a fifty-seven-pounder. I figured you’d want to congratulate me.”
Bob did.
Bob did.
“They’ve made me a member of the Pius Piscatorials—swell club down here,” continued dad jubilantly, and again Bob did the congratulating act. “By the way, how’s hustling?” went on dad.
“They’ve made me a member of the Pius Piscatorials—great club down here,” dad continued happily, and once again Bob congratulated him. “By the way, how’s hustling?” dad asked.
“I’m hustling all right.”
"I'm grinding, for sure."
“That’s good. Well, good-by, son. I’ll be short of funds presently, but that doesn’t worry me. I’m having the time of my life. By-by, dear boy.”
“That’s great. Well, goodbye, son. I’ll be low on cash soon, but I’m not worried about it. I’m having the time of my life. Bye-bye, dear boy.”
“By-by, dad, dear.”
“Bye-bye, Dad, dear.”
“Hold on, Mr. Bennett.” It was the telephone operator once more. “There’s another party that’s bound to speak to you, and take it from me I don’t like the sound of his voice. I hope he isn’t like that first party that was talking to you. What us poor girls has to put up with is something shameful, and—All right. Go ahead.”
“Hold on, Mr. Bennett.” It was the telephone operator again. “There’s another caller who really wants to talk to you, and trust me, I don’t like the sound of his voice. I hope he’s not like the first person you were talking to. What we poor girls have to deal with is just shameful, and—All right. Go ahead.”
“This is Dickie,” said a voice. “Say! you leave my girl alone. I’ve heard of your goings-on.”
“This is Dickie,” a voice said. “Hey! Leave my girl alone. I know about your actions.”
“Who told you?” asked Bob. “That Peeping Tom? That maniac-medico?”
“Who told you?” Bob asked. “That Peeping Tom? That crazy doctor?”
“I told you before I was going to marry her. You keep off the premises if you know what is good for you.” Dickie was so mad he was childish.
“I told you before I was going to marry her. Stay off the property if you know what's good for you.” Dickie was so angry he was acting like a kid.
“No, you’re not going to marry her,” said Bob.
“No, you’re not going to marry her,” Bob said.
“You—you don’t mean to say you’re engaged to her?” came back in choked tones.
“You—you can’t be saying you’re engaged to her?” came back in choked tones.
“No. She’s only my jolly little pal. But she thinks a lot of what I tell her and I’ll pick out a real man for her some day. You aren’t good enough. A chap that will punch another chap when he can’t defend himself isn’t the chap for jolly little pal.”
“No. She’s just my cheerful little friend. But she really values what I tell her, and I’ll find her a real guy someday. You’re not good enough. A guy who hits someone when they can’t defend themselves isn’t the right guy for my cheerful little friend.”
“I didn’t punch you when you couldn’t defend yourself,” said Dickie indignantly.
“I didn’t hit you when you couldn’t defend yourself,” Dickie said angrily.
“I’m the one to know. You gave it to me all right, and thereby settled your chances with her. Do you think I’d let a girl like her marry a chap like you? Why, you might come home and beat your wife! You’re capable of it. I refuse my consent absolutely. I shall advise her to have nothing whatever to do with you.”
“I’m the one who knows. You definitely gave it to me, and that closed off your chances with her. Do you really think I’d let someone like her marry a guy like you? You could come home and hurt your wife! You’re capable of that. I absolutely refuse to give my consent. I’ll tell her to stay away from you completely.”
Dickie couldn’t speak and Bob left him in a state of coma. This time Bob was suffered to leave the telephone booth. He was awfully glad they had the maniac-medico locked up. Maybe he would get a cute little room with a cunning little window, and maybe there’d be a landscape? But there wouldn’t be any flowers.
Dickie couldn’t talk and Bob left him in a coma. This time Bob was allowed to leave the phone booth. He was really glad they had the crazy doctor locked up. Maybe he’d get a nice little room with a charming window, and maybe there’d be a view? But there wouldn’t be any flowers.
Just at this moment the temperamental little thing hurried up to Bob in a state of great agitation. He saw that something serious had happened.
Just then, the fiery little thing rushed up to Bob, clearly upset. He noticed that something important had occurred.
CHAPTER XX—HAND-READING
“Did you get rid of it?” he asked hurriedly.
“Did you get rid of it?” he asked quickly.
“I did not,” she gasped. “That mean old monocle-man wouldn’t let me. He’s just kept his eye on me every moment. When I went up-stairs, he followed. There he is now. See how he’s watching us. Oh, what shall I do, if they find me with it?”
“I didn’t,” she gasped. “That mean old guy with the monocle wouldn’t let me. He’s been watching me every minute. When I went upstairs, he followed me. There he is now. Look how he’s staring at us. Oh, what will I do if they catch me with it?”
“Give it to me,” said Bob.
“Give it to me,” Bob said.
“No, I won’t.”
“Nope, not doing it.”
“But do you realize what it means if they find it on you?” he asked in alarm.
“But do you understand what it means if they find it on you?” he asked urgently.
“We would go to jail together,” said jolly little pal.
“We would go to jail together,” said my cheerful little friend.
“But I won’t have you go to jail. It’s preposterous.”
“But I’m not letting you go to jail. That’s ridiculous.”
“Maybe I deserve it,” she remarked, “for having ‘peached.’ I hope,” wistfully, “our cells will be close together. Did you have a nice dance with Miss Gerald?”
“Maybe I deserve it,” she said, “for spilling the beans. I hope,” she added with a hint of longing, “our cells will be close together. Did you enjoy your dance with Miss Gerald?”
“Give it to me,” commanded Bob sternly. “If you don’t, I’ll—I’ll take it from you.”
“Give it to me,” Bob ordered firmly. “If you don’t, I’ll—I’ll just take it from you.”
But she put her hand behind her. “Isn’t Gwendoline the most beautiful thing in the world?” she said. “We’ll talk about her in jail. It’ll help pass the time.”
But she put her hand behind her. “Isn’t Gwendoline the most beautiful thing in the world?” she said. “We’ll talk about her in jail. It’ll help pass the time.”
“Give—”
"Give—"
“I’m not the least bit jealous, because now I’m only your really-truly little pal,” she went on. “I wish I could be your best man. But I don’t suppose that’s feasible.”
“I’m not jealous at all, because now I’m just your real little buddy,” she continued. “I wish I could be your best man. But I guess that’s not possible.”
“Give—”
"Give —"
“I might swallow it,” she observed tentatively.
“I might swallow it,” she said carefully.
“Great heavens!” he reached for her hand.
“Wow!” he reached for her hand.
“Aw!—fortune-telling?” said a voice.
“Aw!—is that fortune-telling?” said a voice.
“Yes; he was just going to read my palm,” answered jolly little pal promptly while Bob turned rather nervously to regard the monocle-man.
“Yes; he was just about to read my palm,” answered the cheerful little friend quickly while Bob nervously looked over at the man with the monocle.
“Perhaps—aw!—I could read it,” suggested the monocle-man, looking at the closed fingers. “I have some—aw!—skill that way. Perhaps, Miss Dolly—aw!—you would permit me to look at your heart line?”
“Maybe—oh!—I could read it,” suggested the monocle guy, looking at the closed fingers. “I have some—oh!—skill in that area. Perhaps, Miss Dolly—oh!—you would let me take a look at your heart line?”
“I just won’t,” said Miss Dolly, with flashing eyes.
“I just won’t,” said Miss Dolly, her eyes flashing.
Bob watched her closely. If she tried to swallow it, he would stop her.
Bob watched her closely. If she tried to swallow it, he would stop her.
“How—aw!—very unkind!” said the monocle-man. “If you would—aw!—permit me, I could tell you—? aw!—just what kind of a man you’re going to marry.”
“How—wow!—really unkind!” said the monocle man. “If you would—wow!—let me, I could tell you—? wow!—just what kind of guy you’re going to marry.”
“I’m not going to marry any one,” replied the jolly little pal.
“I’m not going to marry anyone,” replied the cheerful little friend.
“Please now, do—aw!” he urged.
“Please, do it—aw!” he urged.
“Well, if you want to be tiresome.” She gave him the hand that didn’t hold the ring.
“Well, if you want to be a pain.” She gave him the hand that wasn’t holding the ring.
“Impulsive! Charming!” he said, bending his monocle owlishly over the soft pink palm. “Now the other?”
“Impulsive! Charming!” he said, adjusting his monocle thoughtfully over the soft pink palm. “Now the other?”
“Won’t!” she returned succinctly.
“Won’t!” she replied sharply.
Bob drew yet nearer. He believed she was quite capable of carrying out that threat of swallowing it.
Bob moved in closer. He thought she was definitely capable of following through on her threat to swallow it.
“But how can I complete telling your fortune—aw!—unless I see the other hand?” expostulated the monocle-man with a pleasant smile. “I desire especially to examine the Mount of Venus.”
“But how can I finish telling your fortune—oh!—unless I see the other hand?” the man with the monocle protested with a friendly smile. “I really want to take a closer look at the Mount of Venus.”
“There isn’t any mountain any more,” said the jolly little pal. “It’s been moved away.”
“There isn’t a mountain anymore,” said the cheerful little friend. “It’s been moved.”
“Aw! How interesting! Then we might survey the vale of friendship.”
“Wow! How interesting! Then we might explore the valley of friendship.”
She looked around like a bird in a snare; the hammer-man was not far away and impulsively she flew over to him.
She scanned her surroundings like a trapped bird; the hammer-man was close by, and on impulse, she rushed over to him.
“Was this our dance? I’m so forgetful!”
“Was this our dance? I’m so forgetful!”
“It wasn’t, but it is,” he returned with a smile. Obviously he was flattered. Heretofore Miss Dolly had not acted particularly prepossessed by the hammer-thrower; he hadn’t any temperament—so she thought; he didn’t swing one around with enough abandon. He was one of those serious goody-goody dancers. He swung Miss Dolly very seriously now; they went so slowly for her that once she stumbled over his feet. It was evident their temperaments didn’t match. Or maybe what she held in one hand had made her terribly self-conscious. Bob watched them gloomily. He feared she might swallow it during the dance, but she didn’t, for the little hand was partly closed still when she left the hammer-thrower and Bob gazed around for that confounded monocle-man. The latter, however, had apparently lost interest in palm-reading and the temperamental little thing, for he was nowhere to be seen. Miss Dolly’s eyes were at once frightened and strange when she fluttered again to Bob’s side.
“It wasn’t, but it is,” he replied with a smile. Clearly, he was flattered. Up until now, Miss Dolly hadn’t seemed particularly interested in the hammer-thrower; she thought he didn't have much of a personality—he didn’t swing her around with enough energy. He was one of those serious, goody-goody dancers. He swung Miss Dolly seriously now; they moved so slowly for her that she stumbled over his feet. It was obvious their personalities didn’t match. Or maybe what she was holding in one hand made her feel really self-conscious. Bob watched them with disappointment. He worried she might drop it during the dance, but she didn’t, since her little hand was still partly closed when she left the hammer-thrower and Bob looked around for that irritating monocle guy. However, the monocle man had seemingly lost interest in palm-reading and the quirky little act, as he was nowhere to be found. Miss Dolly’s eyes looked both scared and strange when she fluttered back to Bob’s side.
“Oh, I’ve done the most awful thing,” she confided quite breathlessly to him.
“Oh, I’ve done the most terrible thing,” she confided breathlessly to him.
“You—you haven’t swallowed it?” he exclaimed in alarm. He thought he had watched her closely, but still she might have found opportunity—she might have made a swift movement to her lips which he had failed to observe.
“You—you didn’t swallow it?” he said in alarm. He thought he had been watching her closely, but she might have found a chance—she might have quickly moved it to her lips without him noticing.
“No, I haven’t swallowed it,” she answered. “I’ve done worse.”
“No, I haven’t swallowed it,” she replied. “I’ve done worse.”
“Worse? What could be worse?”
“Worse? What could be worse?”
“I slipped it into his waistcoat pocket.”
“I slipped it into his pocket.”
“Whose? The hammer-thrower? No? By jove!—”
“Whose? The hammer thrower? No? Wow!”
“I did it when I tripped. And I tripped purposely, and when he was very gallant and kept me from falling, I—I slipped it in. And isn’t it awful? Poor man! He’s such a goody-good. You don’t mind, do you?” Anxiously.
“I did it when I tripped. And I tripped on purpose, and when he was very chivalrous and caught me from falling, I—I slipped it in. And isn’t it terrible? Poor guy! He’s such a goody-goody. You don’t mind, do you?” Anxiously.
“Oh, I mind a heap,” said Bob jovially. “Ho! ho!”
“Oh, I care a lot,” said Bob cheerfully. “Ha! Ha!”
“I was afraid you might scold.”
“I was worried you might yell at me.”
“Scold? No, indeed. I’m awfully obliged and I only wish I could do something for you to show how thankful I am.”
“Scold? No way. I’m really grateful and I just wish I could do something for you to show how thankful I am.”
“Do you? Then you might—” She gazed toward the conservatory where it was dim and shadowy. “No; it wouldn’t do. We’re not engaged any more. Besides—” And she looked toward a straight proud figure with golden hair. She didn’t finish what she was going to say. Only—“I guess I won’t make you,” she added.
“Do you? Then you might—” She looked over at the conservatory, which was dark and shadowy. “No; that wouldn’t work. We’re not engaged anymore. Besides—” And she glanced towards a tall, confident figure with golden hair. She didn’t finish her thought. Only—“I guess I won’t force you,” she added.
“Thanks,” said Bob. “You’re sure the best pal a chap ever had. But honest! I hate to be mean and disappoint you after all you’ve done. And I might volunteer, if you’d make it just one—or, at the most, two.”
“Thanks,” said Bob. “You’re the best friend a guy could ever have. But honestly! I really hate to be unfair and let you down after everything you’ve done. I might volunteer if you could just make it one—or, at the most, two.”
A moment the temperamental little thing seemed to waver. Then the rosebud lips set more firmly. “No,” she said. “It’s awfully dear of you to offer, but I don’t want any. You’ve made me see the error of my ways. I’ve reformed. I only want to be your jolly little pal. But you haven’t any conscientious scruples about the way I disposed of it, have you?” she asked, swiftly changing the subject.
A moment, the feisty little thing seemed to hesitate. Then her rosebud lips pressed together more firmly. “No,” she said. “It’s really sweet of you to offer, but I don’t want any. You’ve helped me realize my mistakes. I’ve changed. I just want to be your cheerful little friend. But you don’t have any issues with the way I got rid of it, do you?” she asked, quickly shifting the topic.
“Conscientious scruples? Not one. Ho! ho!”
“Conscious concerns? Not a single one. Ha! Ha!”
But the laughter faded suddenly from Bob’s lips. At that moment the hammer-thrower chanced to put his fingers in his waistcoat pocket. Then he gave a slight start and glanced toward the temperamental little thing; his brow was lowering, and he appeared to meditate. Bob knew there must be murder in his heart. Just then from across the room, Bob saw the monocle-man approaching the hammer-thrower.
But the laughter suddenly disappeared from Bob's lips. At that moment, the hammer-thrower happened to put his fingers in his waistcoat pocket. Then he flinched slightly and looked toward the moody little guy; his brow was furrowed, and he seemed to be deep in thought. Bob knew he must be plotting something sinister. Just then, from across the room, Bob saw the monocle-man walking toward the hammer-thrower.
The latter cast a swift look toward him of the monocle. It was the look of a man who for the first time, perhaps, fully realizes, or begins to realize certain unexpected forces arrayed against him. He now had the ring and he dared not keep it. If he had never entertained any suspicions regarding the monocle-man’s identity before, there was something about the other now that awoke sudden and secret misgivings. The monocle-man didn’t make much of a point of disguising his watchfulness at the present time. That was odd—unless he didn’t greatly care just now whether any one guessed his identity or not. Possibly the psychological moment was approaching.
The latter shot a quick glance at the guy with the monocle. It was the look of someone who was starting to realize, maybe for the first time, that unexpected forces were working against him. He had the ring now, but he couldn't keep it. If he had never suspected who the monocle-man really was before, something about him now sparked sudden and secret doubts. The monocle-man wasn’t bothering to hide his observation at that moment. That was strange—unless he didn’t care if anyone figured out who he was. Maybe the right moment was coming.
The hammer-thrower thought, no doubt, that Bob had told the temperamental little thing that he (the hammer-man) had taken the ring from Miss Gerald’s room and Miss Dolly had offered to return it to the hammer-thrower. And she had found a way to do so. It was clever. But the hammer-thrower was not in a mood to appreciate the grim jest. Now that the tables were turned, Bob and Miss Dolly would make it their business to see that the glittering trifle was found in his possession. The hammer-thrower couldn’t dispose of it under the circumstances; he was in exactly the same predicament Bob had been in. Suddenly he seemed to make up his mind what to do; he adopted the most daring expedient. In those few moments he had done some very rapid thinking. He stepped toward Miss Gerald now, his face wearing its most reliable expression. Honesty fairly radiated from his square solid countenance.
The hammer-thrower probably thought that Bob had informed the sensitive little thing that he (the hammer-thrower) had taken the ring from Miss Gerald’s room and that Miss Dolly had offered to return it to him. And she had figured out a way to do it. It was smart. But the hammer-thrower wasn’t in the mood to appreciate the dark joke. Now that the situation had flipped, Bob and Miss Dolly would make sure that the shiny trinket was found in his possession. The hammer-thrower couldn’t get rid of it now; he was in the exact same situation Bob had been in. Suddenly, he seemed to decide what to do; he came up with a bold plan. In those few moments, he thought quickly. He stepped toward Miss Gerald now, wearing his most trustworthy expression. Honesty shone from his strong, solid face.
“Miss Gerald,” he said, “may I speak with you privately?”
“Miss Gerald,” he said, “can I talk to you privately?”
“Is it important?” she asked.
“Is it important?” she asked.
“Very!” in his most serious manner.
“Absolutely!” in his most serious tone.
She complied with his request, and they withdrew from the hearing of others.
She agreed to his request, and they stepped away from the hearing of others.
“Miss Gerald,” he began abruptly, “have you lost a ring?”
“Miss Gerald,” he said suddenly, “have you lost a ring?”
She gazed at him in surprise.
She looked at him in surprise.
“I have.”
"I do."
“Is this it? I believe I recognize it as one you have worn.”
“Is this it? I think I recognize it as one you've worn.”
“It is.” Gwendoline’s look swerved toward Bob. “But—” she began.
“It is.” Gwendoline looked over at Bob. “But—” she started.
“You do not understand how it came in my possession?” he asked, in an even monotonous tone.
“You don’t get how it ended up in my hands?” he asked, in a flat, even tone.
“I certainly did not think that you—”
“I definitely didn't think that you—”
“You didn’t think I had it?” Seriously.
“You really didn’t think I had it?” Seriously.
“I did not.” And again she looked toward Bob.
“I didn't.” And again, she glanced at Bob.
“I did not know I had it myself,” he observed gravely, “until just this minute. You believe me, I trust?”
“I didn't realize I had it myself,” he said seriously, “until just now. You believe me, right?”
“Yes,” she said slowly, “I believe you. But how—?” Again she paused.
“Yes,” she said slowly, “I believe you. But how—?” Again she paused.
“Did I come by it? A certain young lady I danced with just now placed it in my waistcoat pocket.”
“Did I get this? A young lady I just danced with put it in my waistcoat pocket.”
The hammer-thrower held himself squarely, with a poise that expressed rectitude. He was rather well satisfied with what he had done. He argued that his action, from Miss Gerald’s point of view, must be that of an innocent man. If he (the hammer-thrower) had taken the ring it wasn’t likely he would step up to Miss Gerald and offer it back to her. His bold move complicated the issue; but he did not doubt, however, that he would emerge from the affair with credit.
The hammer-thrower stood confidently, with a stance that showed he was in the right. He felt pretty good about his actions. He believed that from Miss Gerald’s perspective, he must look like an innocent man. If he (the hammer-thrower) had taken the ring, it didn’t seem likely he would just approach Miss Gerald and give it back. His daring move made things more complicated, but he was sure he would come out of this situation looking good.
“Of course I am aware that it is a serious charge to make,” went on the hammer-thrower, “but what was I to do? I never was put in a more painful position.”
“Of course I know this is a serious accusation,” the hammer thrower continued, “but what was I supposed to do? I’ve never been in a more difficult situation.”
“Painful, indeed,” replied Miss Gerald sympathetically. “Of course it was a joke.”
“Really painful,” Miss Gerald said, feeling sympathetic. “Of course, it was just a joke.”
“I am glad you take that view of it,” he replied. “You can see that naturally I found it deucedly awkward. Things have been disappearing in so many country-houses, don’t you know. It wouldn’t have been a joke for me if I hadn’t fortunately discovered it as I did. Under the circumstances, I don’t really appreciate Miss Dolly’s jokes.”
“I’m glad you see it that way,” he replied. “You can imagine I found it incredibly awkward. Things have been disappearing in so many country houses, you know. It wouldn’t have been funny for me if I hadn’t luckily found it the way I did. Given the situation, I really don’t find Miss Dolly’s jokes amusing.”
“But mightn’t it have been some one else?” suggested Gwendoline.
"But could it have been someone else?" suggested Gwendoline.
“I danced only with you and Miss Dolly.”
“I only danced with you and Miss Dolly.”
“Well, naturally, it wouldn’t be I,” said Gwendoline with a smile. “There’s Dolly now talking with Mr. Bennett and Lord Stanfield, Suppose we speak to her. But I wouldn’t have any one else know for the world. I’m really very sorry Dolly’s heedlessness should have caused one of my aunt’s guests any embarrassment.” Miss Gerald was graciousness itself.
“Well, of course, it wouldn’t be me,” Gwendoline said with a smile. “There’s Dolly over there chatting with Mr. Bennett and Lord Stanfield. Let’s go talk to her. But I wouldn’t want anyone else to find out for anything. I really feel bad that Dolly’s carelessness caused one of my aunt’s guests any embarrassment.” Miss Gerald was the very definition of gracious.
In spite of the thrill of the moment, the hammer-thrower couldn’t prevent an expression of honest approval gleaming from his eyes. “You are very kind,” he said in a low tone. “You will never know all this visit has meant to me. I, too, regret exceedingly that what you regard as one of Miss Dolly’s mad pranks—and we all know how prone she is to do the unconventional—should have involved me in a little episode that, perhaps, isn’t so agreeable as it should be. I trust, though, you don’t blame me for coming to you at once about the matter?”
Despite the excitement of the moment, the hammer thrower couldn’t hide the genuine look of approval in his eyes. “You’re very kind,” he said softly. “You’ll never know how much this visit means to me. I, too, really regret that what you see as one of Miss Dolly’s crazy stunts—and we all know how she loves to be unconventional—has pulled me into a situation that might not be as pleasant as it should be. I hope, though, you don’t hold it against me for coming to you right away about this?”
“Why should I blame you?” The violet eyes full on the deep serious ones.
“Why should I blame you?” The violet eyes stared deeply into the serious ones.
“I suppose I might just have placed it somewhere, on the mantle, for example, and not said anything about Miss Dolly’s part in the affair,” he observed musingly. “It might have been more chivalrous. One doesn’t like to complain of a woman, you know, and a fellow guest at that.” With regret that sounded genuine.
“I guess I could have just put it somewhere, like on the mantle, and not mentioned Miss Dolly’s involvement in this,” he said thoughtfully. “That would have been more polite. You don’t want to complain about a woman, especially when she’s a fellow guest.” There was a hint of genuine regret in his voice.
“I think you took the only course a conscientious man could,” said Gwendoline Gerald. “Indeed, I can appreciate your position. You did what any honest man would feel impelled to do.”
“I think you took the only route a responsible person could,” said Gwendoline Gerald. “Honestly, I understand your situation. You did what any decent person would feel compelled to do.”
Again that gracious smile! Again a slight gleaming in the hammer-man’s eyes! At the moment she seemed to realize in every way the poet’s picture of regal young womanhood—“divinely tall” and most divinely fashioned, she appeared, as she stood with the light from a great chandelier full upon her.
Again that charming smile! Again a slight sparkle in the blacksmith's eyes! At that moment, she seemed to embody the poet's image of regal young womanhood—“divinely tall” and beautifully shaped, she appeared as she stood under the bright light of a large chandelier.
“Your approval is very dear to me,” the hammer-thrower murmured. “I think I have your friendship. That is much—much, indeed. But—” For a moment he seemed about to say more. His strong, honest-looking face surely wore an expression of some feeling deeper than friendship.
“Your approval means a lot to me,” the hammer-thrower murmured. “I believe I have your friendship. That’s a lot—truly, it is. But—” For a moment, he looked like he was going to say more. His strong, genuine face definitely showed an expression of something deeper than just friendship.
Would Gwendoline Gerald have shrunk from a verbal expression of what his look seemed to imply? The violet eyes never appeared deeper, more enigmatic—receptive. The hammer-thrower did not go on, however. He reverted to that other topic.
Would Gwendoline Gerald have held back from saying what his look seemed to suggest? The violet eyes never looked more intense, more mysterious—open. The hammer-thrower didn’t continue, though. He went back to that other topic.
“Perhaps it would be as well to drop the matter altogether,” he remarked. “I am quite satisfied to do so, if you are.”
“Maybe it would be best to just forget about it,” he said. “I’m totally fine with that if you are.”
“That is nice of you,” she said in a tone that implied she still approved of him. “But I think I shall speak to Dolly. Or, at least, let her see the ring is on my finger.”
“That’s really nice of you,” she said in a tone that suggested she still liked him. “But I think I’ll talk to Dolly. Or, at least, let her see the ring on my finger.”
“I can’t understand why she should have done it,” he observed in puzzled accents as they crossed the room. “I can’t quite see how it can be classed as a joke.”
“I can’t understand why she would have done that,” he said in confusion as they walked across the room. “I can’t really see how it can be considered a joke.”
“Dolly has the wildest idea of humor,” returned Gwendoline. “As a little girl she was always doing the maddest things. Perhaps, too, she has been reading about those sensational robberies and wished to perpetrate a hoax.”
“Dolly has the craziest sense of humor,” Gwendoline replied. “When she was a little girl, she always did the weirdest things. Maybe she’s also been reading about those sensational robberies and wants to pull off a prank.”
“I say, that would have been rather rough on a fellow, wouldn’t it?”
“I mean, that would have been pretty tough on a guy, right?”
“And then, after creating a little excitement, she would have come forward and said she did it. Maybe she read about that escapade of young men and girls at an English house-party. They carried off valuables in an automobile, and returned the same, piece-meal, by parcel post. I don’t say my explanation of Dolly’s prank is a correct one,” said Miss Gerald, tentatively lifting long sweeping lashes to regard her companion, “but it may in some measure throw light upon it.”
“And then, after stirring up some excitement, she would have come forward and claimed responsibility. Maybe she heard about that incident with young men and women at an English house party. They stole valuables in a car and returned them piece by piece through parcel post. I’m not saying my explanation for Dolly’s prank is the right one,” Miss Gerald said, tentatively lifting her long, sweeping lashes to look at her companion, “but it might shed some light on it.”
“Unless—?” He paused.
“Unless—?” He hesitated.
“Unless what?” she asked.
"Unless what?" she asked.
“Nothing. Only I was thinking—”
“Nothing. I was just thinking—”
The violet eyes became suddenly darker. “You mean about what you told me this morning—about Mr. Bennett and how you found him—?”
The violet eyes suddenly grew darker. “You mean about what you told me this morning—about Mr. Bennett and how you found him—?”
“I really didn’t wish to speak of that, only it was strange—” He stopped.
“I really didn’t want to talk about that, but it was strange—” He stopped.
“Strange, indeed,” she observed, studying him.
“That's really weird,” she said, looking at him closely.
“Anyhow, I can’t see how to connect that with this,” he confessed.
“Anyway, I can’t figure out how that connects with this,” he admitted.
“There does seem a missing-link somewhere,” observed the girl. “Do you”—and her eyes were again full upon the deep serious ones—“like Mr. Bennett?”
“There seems to be a missing link somewhere,” the girl observed. “Do you”—and her eyes were focused again on his deep, serious ones—“like Mr. Bennett?”
“I neither like nor dislike him.” They had stopped for a moment in a doorway. “His manners have been rather extraordinary. I honestly can’t make him out. He looks rational enough and yet he acts most irrationally.”
“I neither like nor dislike him.” They paused for a moment in a doorway. “His behavior has been quite strange. Honestly, I can’t figure him out. He seems reasonable enough, yet he acts in the most irrational ways.”
“I am going to tell you a great secret,” said the girl. “Please do not speak of it to any one else. Some one in the house has been taking things—in earnest, I mean.”
“I have a big secret to share,” said the girl. “Please don’t tell anyone else. Someone in the house has really been stealing things.”
“No? Is it possible?” he observed. “Then it wouldn’t have been nice for me if that ring—?” Honest indignation shone from his eyes. “I must say Miss Dolly did take a confounded liberty.”
“No? Is that really possible?” he said. “Then it wouldn’t have been fair for me if that ring—?” Genuine anger was clear in his eyes. “I have to say, Miss Dolly really overstepped boundaries.”
“Under the circumstances, yes,” said the girl gravely.
“Given the situation, yes,” the girl said seriously.
“You say things are missing? Great Scott!”
“You say things are missing? Oh my gosh!”
“I did not say missing.” Quickly. “It is a case of substitution.”
“I didn’t say missing.” Quickly. “It’s a case of substitution.”
“Pardon me if I fail to understand.”
“Sorry if I don’t get it.”
She explained. “By jove! that is clever. I am honored by your confidence. I won’t betray it. Your aunt is naturally distressed?”
She explained, “Wow! That’s smart. I appreciate your trust. I won’t let you down. Your aunt is understandably upset?”
“Naturally—though she appears the same as usual. However, she is determined to put an end to these affairs. Society has been frightfully annoyed. It is not nice to ask some one down and then to have her lose—”
“Naturally—though she looks the same as always. However, she is set on putting a stop to these matters. Society has been extremely irritated. It isn't polite to invite someone over and then have her lose—”
“I understand,” said the hammer-thrower gravely. “If your aunt can stop these unfortunate occurrences society will owe her a great debt. But tell me further, if I am not intruding too greatly on your confidences, does the finger of suspicion point anywhere?”
“I get it,” said the hammer-thrower seriously. “If your aunt can put an end to these unfortunate events, society will owe her a huge favor. But tell me more, if I’m not prying too much, does the finger of suspicion point to anyone?”
“Yes,” returned the girl.
“Yes,” replied the girl.
“Of course,” he said, and looked toward Bob.
“Sure,” he said, and glanced at Bob.
That young man’s face did not now express any trace of satisfaction or jovial feeling. He looked both puzzled and worried, and glanced apprehensively from time to time at the sentimental young thing. The monocle-man was telling her fortune now. With British persistence he had reverted to the subject upon again approaching the couple, which he did almost immediately after the hammer-thrower returned to Miss Gerald her ring.
That young man’s face showed no sign of satisfaction or happiness now. He looked both confused and concerned, glancing nervously every now and then at the sentimental young woman. The guy with the monocle was telling her fortune now. With British determination, he went back to the topic as soon as he approached the couple again, which he did almost right after the hammer-thrower returned Miss Gerald's ring.
“You missed your ring?” said the hammer-thrower after a pause.
“You lost your ring?” said the hammer thrower after a pause.
“Yes. But I never imagined—”
“Yes. But I never expected—”
“It would be returned in such an extraordinary manner? I don’t see where he—?” And the hammer-man paused again with downbent brows.
“It would be returned in such an extraordinary way? I don’t see where he—?” And the hammer-man paused again with his brows furrowed.
It was not hard for her to read the thought. He did not see just where Bob Bennett “came in.” That’s what he once more implied. He didn’t wish to be unjust to any one. His expression said that.
It wasn't difficult for her to read his thoughts. He didn't quite understand where Bob Bennett "fit in." That’s what he suggested again. He didn't want to be unfair to anyone. His expression conveyed that.
“I guess it must just have been a whim,” he conceded after a moment, handsomely. “After all, it’s proofs that count.” The sentence had a familiar sound to Miss Gerald who entertained a vague impression she had said something like it to Bob. They approached Dolly.
“I guess it was just a whim,” he admitted after a moment, somewhat graciously. “At the end of the day, it’s the results that matter.” The sentence sounded familiar to Miss Gerald, who had a vague feeling she had said something similar to Bob. They walked over to Dolly.
CHAPTER XXI—HEART OF STONE
“Did he tell you that I—?” began Miss Dolly at once, and snatching her arm from that tiresome monocle-man.
“Did he tell you that I—?” started Miss Dolly immediately, pulling her arm away from that annoying monocle guy.
“Yes, my dear,” said Gwendoline. “And he seemed a little hurt at your sense of humor.”
“Yes, my dear,” Gwendoline said. “And he seemed a bit hurt by your sense of humor.”
The temperamental little thing stood like a wild creature at bay, her eyes glowing like those of a fawn about to receive the arrow of a hunter or a huntress. Miss Gerald did not look a very remorseless huntress, however.
The feisty little thing stood like a wild animal cornered, her eyes shining like those of a fawn about to be struck by an arrow. Miss Gerald didn’t seem like a heartless huntress, though.
“How did he know I did it?” said Dolly with a glance toward the hammer-thrower. “He didn’t catch me at it.” Defiantly.
“How did he know I did it?” Dolly said, glancing at the hammer-thrower. “He didn’t catch me in the act.” Defiantly.
“Deduction, my dear,” replied Gwendoline.
“Deduction, my dear,” replied Gwendoline.
“He can’t prove it. I defy him.” The jolly little pal felt now how one feels when he or she is haled into a court of justice. She wouldn’t “peach” though. They could put her through the third or the thirty-third degree and she wouldn’t tell on Bob. Never! “You have only his word,” with another glance at the hammer-thrower, “and maybe my word is as good as his.” She had to tell a whopper; but she would tell a million for Bob. It was a pal’s duty to.
"He can't prove it. I challenge him." The cheerful little friend felt just like someone being dragged into a courtroom. She wouldn't snitch, though. They could grill her for hours, and she still wouldn't rat out Bob. Never! "You only have his word," she said, glancing at the hammer-thrower, "and maybe my word is just as good as his." She had to tell a big lie, but she'd tell a million for Bob. That was what friends did.
“But I saw you do it,” now interposed the monocle-man with a quiet smile.
“But I saw you do it,” the man with the monocle said, smiling gently.
She almost wilted at that, then threw back her head farther.
She almost crumbled at that, then threw her head back even further.
“I”—Bob stepped quickly forward—“gave it to her. It was I,” gravely to Miss Gerald, “who had your ring. Think what you please.” She had already passed judgment on him, he remembered.
“I”—Bob stepped quickly forward—“gave it to her. It was me,” he said seriously to Miss Gerald, “who had your ring. Think what you want.” She had already made her judgment about him, he remembered.
“Don’t you believe him,” tempestuously interrupted the temperamental little thing. “I took it myself. It—it was just a joke.”
“Don’t believe him,” interrupted the fiery little one. “I took it myself. It—it was just a joke.”
“That’s what Miss Gerald and I were saying just now,” observed the hammer-thrower heavily. He held himself just as if he were a remote, rather puzzled bystander.
“That’s what Miss Gerald and I were saying just now,” the hammer-thrower remarked. He carried himself as if he were a distant, somewhat confused observer.
Bob gave a hoarse laugh. He couldn’t control himself.
Bob let out a rough laugh. He couldn't hold it back.
“I beg your pardon,” observed the monocle-man, “but I am afraid Miss Dolly, in her zeal, is rather misleading in her statements. Her vale of friendship, I have noticed, on her palm, is well developed. At the same time I can not let her wrongfully accuse herself, even though the matter should pass as a jest. I have to tell the truth—you must forgive me, Miss Dolly. But I saw Mr. Bennett pass you that ring during the dance.”
“I’m sorry to interrupt,” said the man with the monocle, “but I think Miss Dolly, in her enthusiasm, is being a bit misleading with her statements. I’ve noticed that her friendship line is quite strong on her palm. At the same time, I can’t let her falsely accuse herself, even if this should be taken as a joke. I have to be honest—you’ll need to forgive me, Miss Dolly. But I saw Mr. Bennett give you that ring during the dance.”
“But why should he?” spoke up Miss Gerald. “Can’t you enlighten me, dear?” To the temperamental young thing.
“But why should he?” Miss Gerald chimed in. “Can’t you fill me in, dear?” to the moody young thing.
“I won’t say a word,” said the latter at a loss. “Only I’d like to tell you”—to the monocle-man—“how much I like you.”
“I won’t say a word,” said the other, feeling confused. “I just want to tell you”—to the man with the monocle—“how much I like you.”
“I’m sorry to have displeased you,” he answered simply. “You have really a charming hand. As for the reason you ask”—to Miss Gerald—“it should not be difficult to find. I conclude that Mr. Bennett asked Miss Dolly to return the ring to Miss Gerald’s room. I think that was what she was trying to do and I’m afraid I prevented her.”
“I’m sorry for upsetting you,” he replied simply. “You really have a lovely hand. As for the reason you’re asking”—to Miss Gerald—“it shouldn’t be hard to figure out. I assume that Mr. Bennett asked Miss Dolly to take the ring back to Miss Gerald’s room. I think that’s what she was trying to do, and I'm afraid I stopped her.”
“But why should Mr. Bennett”—Gwendoline did not deign to address that young man direct—“have asked Dolly to do that?”
“But why should Mr. Bennett”—Gwendoline didn’t bother to speak to that young man directly—“have asked Dolly to do that?”
“Maybe,” suggested the monocle-man, “Mr. Bennett will answer that himself.”
“Maybe,” suggested the man with the monocle, “Mr. Bennett will answer that himself.”
“What’s the use?” said Bob. “Nobody believes anything I say.” Miss Gwendoline still acted as if she did not see him.
“What’s the point?” Bob said. “Nobody believes anything I say.” Miss Gwendoline still acted as if she didn't see him.
“If you take him to jail, I’m going too,” remarked the temperamental little thing. “If he’s guilty, I—”
“If you take him to jail, I’m going too,” said the feisty little one. “If he’s guilty, I—”
“You suggest, then, he is guilty?” said the monocle-man quickly.
“You're saying that he's guilty?” said the guy with the monocle quickly.
“No; no! I—”
“No; no! I—”
“I fear you have suggested it,” he interrupted pointedly.
“I think you suggested it,” he interrupted sharply.
“If people confess do they get lighter sentences?” she asked with a quick breath.
“If people confess, do they get lighter sentences?” she asked, taking a quick breath.
“Usually,” said the monocle-man.
"Usually," said the guy with the monocle.
Jolly little pal pondered painfully. Perhaps she saw plainer than Bob how clear was the case against him. “Why don’t you?” she suggested.
Jolly little friend thought deeply. Maybe she realized more clearly than Bob how strong the case was against him. “Why don’t you?” she proposed.
Bob smiled feebly. “The answer I make is the same one I gave to Miss Gerald when I last spoke to her.”
Bob smiled weakly. “The answer I’m giving is the same one I gave to Miss Gerald the last time I talked to her.”
A flame sprang to Gwendoline’s cheek.
A blush rose to Gwendoline's cheek.
“You dare say that now—with all this evidence against you?” She showed herself keenly aware of his presence now.
“You really think you can say that now—with all this evidence stacked against you?” She was clearly aware of him being there now.
“I dare.” He stepped to her side and looked into her eyes. “My eyes are saying it now.”
“I dare.” He moved closer to her and gazed into her eyes. “They're telling you that right now.”
The girl’s breast stirred quickly. Did she fear he would say those words aloud, before all the others? He was reckless enough to do so.
The girl’s chest tightened quickly. Did she worry he would say those words out loud, in front of everyone? He was bold enough to do it.
“Do you understand or shall I make it plainer?” he asked, swinging back his blond head.
“Do you get it, or should I explain it more clearly?” he asked, tossing his blond hair back.
“I do not think that will be necessary,” she answered with some difficulty.
“I don’t think that will be necessary,” she replied with some difficulty.
“What is it all about?” said the hammer-man, and there was a slight frown on his brow.
“What is it all about?” said the guy with the hammer, and there was a slight frown on his brow.
“You ought to know,” returned Bob, as his eyes met swiftly the other’s. For a moment gaze encountered gaze. Bob’s now was sardonically ironical, yet challenging. The hammer-thrower’s was mystified. Then the latter shrugged.
“You should know,” Bob replied, quickly locking eyes with the other person. For a moment, their gazes clashed. Bob’s look was sarcastically ironic, yet defiant. The hammer-thrower’s expression was one of confusion. Then the latter shrugged.
“Is he mad as well as a—” he spoke musingly.
“Is he crazy as well as a—” he said thoughtfully.
“Thief,” said Bob. “Say it right out. I’m not afraid of the word.”
“Thief,” Bob said. “Just say it. I’m not scared of the word.”
The hammer-thrower sighed heavily. “What are we to do?” he said to Miss Gerald sympathetically. “It is needless to say, you can command me.”
The hammer thrower let out a deep sigh. “What are we going to do?” he said to Miss Gerald with sympathy. “It goes without saying, I’m at your command.”
“Isn’t that lovely?” Sotto voce from Bob.
“Isn’t that lovely?” Bob said quietly.
“I’m terribly afraid the affair has passed from the joke stage,” said Gwendoline Gerald and once more she appeared cool and composed. Again she made Bob feel he was but a matter for consideration—an intrusive and unwelcome matter that had to be disposed of. “What ought I to do?”
“I’m really afraid this situation has gone beyond being a joke,” said Gwendoline Gerald, and once again she seemed calm and collected. Once more, she made Bob feel like he was just something to be dealt with—an unwelcome presence that needed to be resolved. “What should I do?”
“Arrest me, of course,” returned Bob. “I’ve been waiting for it for some time. And the funny part is, the affair hasn’t passed from the joke stage. You know that.” To the hammer-man. “Why don’t you chuckle?”
“Arrest me, sure,” Bob replied. “I’ve been expecting it for a while. And the funny thing is, it still feels like a joke. You know that.” To the guy with the hammer. “Why aren’t you laughing?”
“I suppose I may as well tell you I’m a bogus lord,” unexpectedly interrupted the monocle-man at this moment. “My name is not even a high-sounding one.” The hammer-thrower started slightly. “It’s plain Michael Moriarity. But I was once a lord’s valet.” He had dropped his drawl, though he still kept his monocle. “I am sorry to have intruded as a real personage among you all, although there are plenty of bogus lords floating through society.”
“I guess I should just come out and say I’m a fake lord,” the guy with the monocle suddenly cut in. “My name isn’t even something fancy.” The hammer-thrower flinched a bit. “It’s just plain Michael Moriarity. But I used to be a lord’s valet.” He had dropped his accent, though he still wore his monocle. “I apologize for crashing your gathering as if I were someone important, even though there are plenty of fake lords wandering around in society.”
“Oh, you didn’t deceive me,” answered jolly little pal. “I knew who you were.”
“Oh, you didn’t fool me,” replied the cheerful little friend. “I knew who you were.”
“Well, you certainly hoodwinked the rest of us,” observed the hammer-thrower slowly. He stood with his head down as if thinking deeply. When he looked up, he gazed straight into the monocle-man’s eyes. They were twinkling and good-humored. An arrest in high society was rather a ceremonious affair. You didn’t take a man by the scruff of the neck and yank him to the patrol wagon. There were polite formalities to be observed. The end had to be accomplished without shocking or disturbing the other guests. The truly artistic method would, in fact, be the attainment of the result while the guests remained in absolute ignorance, for the time being, of what had been done.
“Well, you really tricked the rest of us,” the hammer-thrower noted slowly. He stood with his head down as if he were deep in thought. When he looked up, he met the monocle-man’s eyes. They were sparkling and cheerful. An arrest in high society was quite a formal event. You didn’t just grab a guy by the collar and haul him to the patrol wagon. There were polite procedures to follow. The goal had to be achieved without shocking or upsetting the other guests. The truly skillful approach would actually be to reach the outcome while the guests remained completely unaware of what had happened, at least for now.
“I’m afraid I’ve got to do my duty,” observed the monocle-man to Bob. “You look like a man who would play the game. A game loser, I mean?” Suggestively.
“I’m afraid I have to do my duty,” said the monocle guy to Bob. “You look like someone who would play fair. A game loser, I mean?” He suggested.
“Oh, I’m a loser all right,” said Bob, looking at the hammer-man. For a moment he wondered if he should speak further. He could imagine how his words would be received. He didn’t forget that he hadn’t a shadow of proof against the hammer-man. Miss Gerald would think he was accusing an innocent person and she would despise him (Bob) only the more—if that were possible. To speak would be but to court the contempt of the others, the laughter of the hammer-man. Bob’s thoughts were terribly confused but he realized he might as well remain silent; indeed, perhaps it would be better for the present.
“Oh, I’m definitely a loser,” said Bob, staring at the hammer-man. For a moment, he considered saying more. He could picture how people would react. He remembered he didn't have any evidence against the hammer-man. Miss Gerald would think he was accusing someone innocent and would look down on him even more—if that was possible. Speaking up would only invite the scorn of the others and the hammer-man's laughter. Bob's thoughts were a jumbled mess, but he understood it was probably best to stay quiet; in fact, maybe that was the best choice for now.
“Anyhow, what I told you wasn’t so,” said jolly little pal to the monocle-man. “And I repeat I will never testify to it.” She was awfully dejected.
“Anyway, what I told you wasn't true,” said the cheerful little friend to the man with the monocle. “And I’ll say again, I will never testify to it.” She looked really upset.
“Yes, you will,” said Bob monotonously. “As I told you, I won’t let you get into trouble.”
“Yes, you will,” Bob said flatly. “Like I told you, I won’t let you get into any trouble.”
“Besides there’s all that other evidence,” suggested the monocle-man.
“Plus, there's all that other evidence,” suggested the man with the monocle.
“I can explain that away,” returned Bob. Then he thought: Could he? Would Dan and Clarence stand by him now and acknowledge it was they he had let out of the house at that unseemly hour? He doubted it. Dickie, too, wouldn’t be very friendly. Their last conversation over the telephone was far from reassuring. “No; I am not sure that I can,” Bob added. He still had to remember he was the impersonation of Truth.
“I can come up with an excuse for that,” Bob replied. Then he thought: Could he? Would Dan and Clarence have his back now and admit that he was the one who let them out of the house at such an inappropriate hour? He wasn’t so sure. Dickie wouldn’t be very supportive either. Their last phone call wasn’t exactly comforting. “No; I’m not sure I can,” Bob added. He still had to keep in mind that he was pretending to be Truth.
“You refer to Miss Gerald’s having seen you wandering about the house after the others had retired, I presume?” suggested the monocle-man, who was enjoying the conversation immensely. It was the kind of a situation he liked. He wouldn’t have curtailed it for the world. When the hammer-man heard the question, his brows lifted slightly. Surely a momentary glint of gladness or satisfaction shone from his gaze. But it receded at once. He listened attentively.
“You're talking about Miss Gerald seeing you wandering around the house after everyone else had gone to bed, right?” the man with the monocle asked, clearly enjoying the exchange. It was exactly the kind of situation he thrived on, and he wouldn't have cut it short for anything. When the hammer-man heard the question, his eyebrows lifted a bit. For a brief moment, a flicker of happiness or satisfaction seemed to appear in his eyes. But it disappeared just as quickly. He listened closely.
“Yes, I was referring to that,” answered Bob, gazing at Gwendoline. She, condemn him to a prison cell! She, swear away his liberty! He gazed wistfully, almost sadly at the sweet inexorable lips which might ruin his life. He didn’t feel resentful; he only determined to put up the best fight he could when the time came.
“Yes, I was talking about that,” Bob replied, looking at Gwendoline. She, sending him to a prison cell! She, taking away his freedom! He looked longingly, almost sadly, at those sweet, unyielding lips that could destroy his life. He didn’t feel bitter; he just resolved to fight as hard as he could when the moment arrived.
“Is—is it necessary to proceed to extremities?” said the hammer-man at this point sedulously. “Would not the mere fact that we all know about the matter be sufficient punishment?” He appealed to Miss Gerald. “My father used to tell me that when a man was down, if we could see the way to extend a helping hand, we would be doing the right thing. I think the world is becoming more tolerant and there is a tendency to give a person a chance to reform, instead of locking him up.”
“Is—is it really necessary to take it this far?” said the hammer-man earnestly. “Wouldn't just the fact that we all know about this be enough of a punishment?” He looked to Miss Gerald for support. “My dad always told me that when someone is down, if we can find a way to lend a helping hand, we’re doing the right thing. I feel like the world is getting more understanding, and there’s a trend to give people a chance to change instead of just locking them up.”
Again Bob laughed. In spite of his unhappiness and that weight of melancholy, the other’s heavy humor tickled Bob’s funny bone. Think of the hammer-man pretending to try to keep Bob out of jail! Didn’t he know how to play his cards? The deadly joke was on Bob.
Again, Bob laughed. Despite his unhappiness and that weight of sadness, the other person's dark humor tickled Bob's funny bone. Just picture the guy with the hammer acting like he was trying to keep Bob out of jail! Didn’t he know how to play his cards? The real joke was on Bob.
“Don’t appeal too hard in my behalf, old chap; you might strain yourself,” he said to the hammer-thrower.
“Don’t try too hard to promote me, buddy; you might hurt yourself,” he said to the hammer-thrower.
But the hammer-thrower pretended not to hear. He kept his sedulous, humane glance on Miss Gerald.
But the hammer-thrower acted like he didn't hear. He kept his attentive, kind gaze on Miss Gerald.
“You mean you would have my aunt take no action in the matter?” she said, and the lovely face was now calm and thoughtful.
“You're saying you want my aunt to do nothing about this?” she said, her beautiful face now calm and thoughtful.
“Please do!” This from jolly little pal. “Dear, dear Gwendoline! It’ll be such a favor to me. And I’ll love you dearly.”
“Please do!” said my cheerful little friend. “Oh, dear Gwendoline! It would mean so much to me. And I’ll love you so much.”
“You certainly are a very doughty champion of Mr. Bennett, Dolly,” observed Miss Gerald. There was a question in her look and her words might have implied that Bob had been making love to the temperamental little thing, even when he dared tell Miss Gerald he cared for her. Gwendoline’s face wore an odd smile now.
“You're definitely a bold supporter of Mr. Bennett, Dolly,” said Miss Gerald. There was a question in her gaze, and her words might have suggested that Bob had been flirting with the moody little thing, even while he boldly told Miss Gerald he had feelings for her. Gwendoline had a strange smile on her face now.
“I’m not interested for the reason you think,” answered the temperamental little thing spiritedly. “He never made love to me—real love. I tried to make him, because he is all that should appeal to any woman, but he wouldn’t,” she went on tempestuously, regardlessly. “And then we vowed we’d be pals and we are. And I’ll stand by him to the last ditch.”
“I’m not interested for the reason you think,” replied the feisty little woman with energy. “He never truly loved me. I tried to get him to feel that way because he has everything that should attract any woman, but he just wouldn’t,” she continued passionately, without concern. “And then we promised we’d be friends, and we are. I’ll support him no matter what.”
“You are very loyal, dear,” said Gwendoline quietly.
“You're really loyal, my dear,” Gwendoline said softly.
“Besides, he’s in love with some one else,” she shot back, and Bob shifted. There was a directness about jolly little pal that was sometimes disconcerting.
“Besides, he’s in love with someone else,” she shot back, and Bob shifted. There was a straightforwardness about the cheerful little friend that was sometimes unsettling.
The hammer-man looked quickly toward Miss Gerald, and his eyes were full of jealousy for an instant. He was not sorry that Bob was going to “get his.” Nevertheless, he would plead for him again, he wouldn’t cease to be consistent in his role.
The hammer-man glanced over at Miss Gerald, and for a moment, his eyes were filled with jealousy. He didn’t regret that Bob was going to “get his.” Still, he would advocate for him once more; he wouldn’t stop being consistent in his role.
“I’ll tell you who it is, too, if you want to know,” the temperamental little thing went on to Gwendoline.
“I’ll tell you who it is, too, if you want to know,” the temperamental little thing continued to Gwendoline.
“My dear, I haven’t asked. It seems to me,” coldly, “we are slightly drifting from the subject.”
“My dear, I haven’t asked. It seems to me,” coldly, “we're slightly getting off topic.”
“I believe you stated just now that you and Mr. Bennett vowed to be pals,” interposed the monocle-man regarding Miss Dolly. “Does that mean you agreed to be accomplices—to divide the ‘swag,’ in the parlance of the lower world?” The monocle-man was enjoying himself more and more. He was finding new interest in the scene. It was more “meaty” than he had dared hope.
“I believe you just said that you and Mr. Bennett promised to be friends,” interrupted the man with the monocle, looking at Miss Dolly. “Does that mean you agreed to be partners in crime—to split the ‘loot,’ as they say in the streets?” The monocle-man was getting more and more entertained. He was discovering new interest in the situation. It was more “exciting” than he had hoped for.
“She doesn’t mean anything of the kind,” put in Bob savagely. “She just extended the hand of friendship. She’s a good fellow, that is all, and I won’t have you imply the slightest thing against her. You understand that, Mr. Bogus Lord?”
“She doesn’t mean anything like that,” Bob interrupted angrily. “She just offered her friendship. She’s a good person, that’s it, and I won’t let you suggest anything negative about her. Do you get that, Mr. Bogus Lord?”
“I only asked a question,” observed the monocle-man humbly.
“I only asked a question,” the monocle guy said humbly.
“Well, you’ve got the answer.” In the same aggressive manner. “She’s a—a brick and I won’t have any harm come to her on my account.”
“Well, you’ve got the answer.” She said it with the same intensity. “She’s a—she’s tough, and I won’t let anything bad happen to her because of me.”
“None of us would have any harm come to Dolly,” said Gwendoline coldly.
“None of us would let anything happen to Dolly,” said Gwendoline coldly.
“I wanted him to elope with me, but he wouldn’t,” went on the temperamental little thing, thinking fast. Bob listened in despair. “I didn’t know then it was only friendship I felt. I thought it was love. And when he refused, I was furious. To be revenged, I went to that horrid man”—looking at him of the monocle—“and told him a pack of lies.”
“I wanted him to run away with me, but he wouldn’t,” the fiery little thing continued, thinking quickly. Bob listened in frustration. “I didn’t realize then that it was just friendship I felt. I thought it was love. And when he turned me down, I was livid. To get back at him, I went to that awful guy”—she looked at the man with the monocle—“and told him a bunch of lies.”
“Lies?” said the monocle-man, smiling sweetly and screwing his glass in farther.
“Lies?” said the guy with the monocle, smiling sweetly and pushing his glasses in further.
“Yes, and that’s the reason I shall give on the witness-stand.” Defiantly. “I’ll tell the truth there—let every one know how horrid and wicked I was.”
“Yeah, and that’s the reason I’ll give on the witness stand.” Defiantly. “I’ll tell the truth there—let everyone know how terrible and awful I was.”
The monocle-man shook his head with mild disapproval. “What do you say to that, Mr. Bennett?” he asked softly.
The monocle guy shook his head with slight disapproval. “What do you think about that, Mr. Bennett?” he asked gently.
“Of course I can’t let her do anything to incriminate herself,” answered Bob mournfully. “To prevent her doing so I shall have to avow right now—? and I do”—firmly—“that those were not lies, but truths she told you.”
“Of course I can’t let her do anything that could get her in trouble,” Bob replied sadly. “To stop her from doing that, I have to admit right now—and I do”—firmly—“that those weren’t lies, but truths she shared with you.”
“Please!—please!—” said jolly little pal piteously.
“Please!—please!—” said the cheerful little friend, pleadingly.
“Truths!” said Bob again boldly.
"Truths!" Bob said again boldly.
Miss Dolly gave a great sigh. “Are you going to confess you are guilty of all they charge?”
Miss Dolly let out a big sigh. “Are you going to admit you're guilty of everything they accuse you of?”
“I am not.” Stubbornly. “I am not guilty.”
“I am not.” Stubbornly. “I’m not guilty.”
“I’m rather afraid certain evidence, including Miss Dolly’s truths, which you acknowledge as such, might tend to show you are,” suggested the monocle-man.
“I’m pretty sure some evidence, including Miss Dolly’s truths, which you admit are true, might suggest that you are,” the man with the monocle suggested.
Again Miss Dolly thought fast. Bob wouldn’t let her declare her accusations of him lies; therefore only one alternative remained.
Again Miss Dolly thought quickly. Bob wouldn’t let her call her accusations against him lies; therefore only one option remained.
“I have a confession to make,” she said solemnly.
“I have something to confess,” she said seriously.
Bob looked startled. “Don’t!—” he began. He wondered into what new realm her inventive faculties would lead her.
Bob looked surprised. “Don’t!—” he started. He wondered what new place her creative mind would take her.
“Mr. Bennett,” observed the monocle-man gravely, “I have to remind you that anything you say can be used against you. And your manner now, in seeking to restrain or interfere with what Miss Dolly has to say, will certainly hurt your case.”
“Mr. Bennett,” the man with the monocle said seriously, “I need to remind you that anything you say can be used against you. Your current behavior, trying to stop or interfere with what Miss Dolly has to say, will definitely hurt your case.”
Bob groaned. He cast hunted eyes upon Miss Dolly. The jolly little pal breathed hard, but there was a look of determination in the dark soulful eyes.
Bob groaned. He looked at Miss Dolly with desperate eyes. The cheerful little friend breathed heavily, but there was a look of determination in her dark, soulful eyes.
“Mr. Mike Something, or whatever your name is,” she said to the monocle-man in a low tense tone, “I am all that which you suggested.”
“Mr. Mike Something, or whatever your name is,” she said to the man with the monocle in a low, tense tone, “I am everything you suggested.”
He overlooked the scornful mode of address. He rubbed his hands softly; his eyes were pleased. “You mean about agreeing to be accomplices and to divide the ‘swag’?”
He ignored the mocking tone. He gently rubbed his hands together; his eyes sparkled with satisfaction. “You’re talking about agreeing to be partners and split the ‘loot’?”
“Yes.” Fatalistically.
“Yeah.” Acceptingly.
Bob groaned again.
Bob groaned yet again.
The temperamental little thing looked up in the air. She would be mainly responsible for sending Bob to jail—the thought burned. What was a treacherous but repentant pal’s duty under the circumstances? She had a vision, too, of those adjoining cells.
The moody little thing looked up into the sky. She would mostly be the one to send Bob to jail—the thought stung. What was a deceitful but remorseful friend supposed to do in this situation? She also imagined the neighboring cells.
“You see,” she began dreamily, “my father is rather sparing of the spending money he allows me, and I have terribly extravagant tastes. Why, my hats alone cost a fortune. I simply have got to have nice and expensive things.” Again Bob groaned. Dolly dreamed on: “I’ve bushel-baskets of silk stockings, for example. See!” Displaying an exquisite ankle. “My gowns all come from Paris. Gwendoline can tell you that.” Miss Gerald did not deny. “And they’re not gowns from those side-street dressmakers, either. They come from the places on the rue de la Paix. Besides”—Dolly’s dream expanded—“I like to take things.” Another groan from Bob. “I think I’m a clepto.”
“You see,” she began dreamily, “my dad is pretty stingy with the spending money he gives me, and I have really expensive tastes. I mean, my hats alone cost a fortune. I absolutely need nice and pricey things.” Bob groaned again. Dolly continued to dream: “I have tons of silk stockings, for example. Look!” She showed off her exquisite ankle. “My dresses all come from Paris. Gwendoline can vouch for that.” Miss Gerald didn’t deny it. “And they’re not from those little side-street shops, either. They come from the fancy places on the rue de la Paix. Plus”—Dolly’s dream grew—“I like to take things.” Another groan from Bob. “I think I’m a klepto.”
“There isn’t one word of truth in what she’s saying,” exclaimed Bob indignantly. “Why, it’s outrageous. She doesn’t realize what she’s doing.”
“There isn’t a single true thing in what she’s saying,” Bob exclaimed, feeling indignant. “This is outrageous. She has no idea what she's doing.”
“Yes, I do,” returned little pal with a stanch and loyal glance. “Why should you take all the blame when I’m entitled to half of it?”
“Yes, I do,” replied the little friend with a steadfast and loyal look. “Why should you take all the blame when I deserve half of it?”
“You aren’t entitled to any of it,” he retorted helplessly. “And there isn’t any blame for you to share, either.”
“You don’t deserve any of it,” he shot back, feeling powerless. “And there’s nothing for you to feel guilty about, either.”
“Do you expect us to believe that?” observed the monocle-man reproachfully.
“Do you really expect us to believe that?” the monocle-man said with a disapproving look.
“No, I don’t.”
“Nope.”
“Or a jury?”
"Or a jury?"
“Perhaps not.”
"Maybe not."
“Really, old chap”—began the hammer-man sedulously, and he looked awfully sorry. Perhaps he was going to extend his sympathy.
“Really, man”—began the hammer-guy earnestly, and he looked really sorry. Maybe he was going to show his sympathy.
“Say it in Latin!” interrupted Bob ungratefully.
“Say it in Latin!” Bob interrupted, ungrateful as ever.
“What does he mean?” queried the monocle-man.
“What does he mean?” asked the man with the monocle.
“I’m really at a loss,” answered the hammer-thrower.
“I’m really confused,” answered the hammer-thrower.
That gentleman had gleaned a great deal of information of a most gratifying nature. He didn’t know all the whys and wherefores, but it was sufficient that Bob seemed too deep in the toils to extricate himself. A happy (to the hammer-man) combination of circumstances had involved the other.
That gentleman had gathered a lot of information that was quite satisfying. He didn't know all the reasons behind it, but it was enough that Bob appeared too caught up to get out of it. A fortunate (for the hammer-man) set of circumstances had entangled the other.
“Please let him go,” again pleaded Miss Dolly to Gwendoline. “Be a dear. Besides, think how he—” She went over to Miss Gerald suddenly and whispered two words—two ardent electrical words!
“Please let him go,” Miss Dolly pleaded again to Gwendoline. “Be a sweetheart. Besides, consider how he—” She suddenly approached Miss Gerald and whispered two words—two charged, intense words!
Gwendoline’s eyes flashed but she did not answer. One of the hammer-thrower’s hands closed.
Gwendoline’s eyes sparked, but she didn’t respond. One of the hammer-thrower’s hands clenched.
“I fear Miss Gerald couldn’t do that now, if she wanted to,” interposed the monocle-man. “It isn’t altogether her affair or her aunt’s. You see, there are other people who gave those other social functions Mr. Bennett attended. They may not incline to be sentimentally—I may say foolishly lenient. So you see even if I desired to oblige a lady”—bowing to Dolly “whom I esteem very much, my hands are tied. Justice, in other words, must take its course.”
“I’m afraid Miss Gerald can't do that now, even if she wanted to,” interrupted the man with the monocle. “It's not just her issue or her aunt's. You see, there are other people involved in those social events that Mr. Bennett attended. They might not be inclined to be sentimentally—I might say foolishly—lenient. So you understand, even if I wanted to help a lady”—he bowed to Dolly—“whom I hold in high regard, my hands are tied. Justice, in other words, must take its course.”
Bob looked at Gwendoline. “Some day, Miss Gerald, you may realize you helped, or tried to help, convict an innocent man.”
Bob looked at Gwendoline. “One day, Miss Gerald, you might understand that you helped, or tried to help, convict an innocent man.”
“She doesn’t care,” said the temperamental little thing vehemently. “She’s got a stone for a heart.” Only that cryptic smile on the proud beautiful lips answered this outbreak. The jolly little pal went right over to her again. “Anyhow,” she said, “he kissed me.”
“She doesn’t care,” said the feisty little thing passionately. “She’s got a heart of stone.” Only that mysterious smile on the proud, beautiful lips responded to this outburst. The cheerful little friend went right over to her again. “Anyway,” she said, “he kissed me.”
Just for an instant Miss Gerald’s sweeping lashes lifted to Bob. Just for an instant, too, Miss Gerald’s white teeth buried themselves in that proud red upper lip. Miss Dolly turned to the monocle-man. “Now, I’m ready to go with you,” she said.
Just for a moment, Miss Gerald’s long lashes lifted to Bob. Just for a moment, too, Miss Gerald’s white teeth sank into that proud red upper lip. Miss Dolly turned to the man with the monocle. “Okay, I’m ready to go with you,” she said.
“Oh, I don’t want you”—then he added “yet! You will appreciate, Mr. Bennett”—turning to Bob—“that the more quietly—I want to show you all the consideration possible—”
“Oh, I don’t want you”—then he added “yet! You will appreciate, Mr. Bennett”—turning to Bob—“that the more quietly—I want to show you all the consideration possible—”
“I’ll go quietly,” muttered Bob. “No use raising a row! I’ll go like a gentleman. I’ll make myself as little obnoxious and objectionable to the rest of Mrs. Ralston’s guests as possible.” Bitterly. “Good-by, Miss Gerald.” That young lady didn’t answer. “Won’t you say good-by?” repeated Bob. There was a gleam of great pleasure in the hammer-thrower’s eyes now. Bob had involuntarily put out his hand but Miss Gerald would not see it. Indeed, she turned farther from him, as if annoyed by Bob’s persistence. Bob’s hand fell to his side, he drew himself up.
“I’ll leave quietly,” muttered Bob. “There’s no point in causing a scene! I’ll leave like a gentleman. I’ll do my best to be as unnoticeable and unoffensive to the other guests at Mrs. Ralston’s as possible.” Bitterly. “Goodbye, Miss Gerald.” The young woman didn’t respond. “Aren’t you going to say goodbye?” Bob repeated. There was a spark of undeniable pleasure in the hammer thrower’s eyes now. Bob had instinctively reached out his hand, but Miss Gerald ignored it. In fact, she turned away from him, as if irritated by Bob’s insistence. Bob's hand fell to his side, and he straightened up.
“I am ready, sir,” he said quietly to the monocle-man.
“I’m ready, sir,” he said softly to the man with the monocle.
“Perhaps it would be as well if you accompanied us,” observed the monocle-man to the hammer-thrower.
“Maybe it would be a good idea if you joined us,” said the guy with the monocle to the hammer-thrower.
“Certainly.” The other understood. Bob was strong and he might change his mind and be less lamblike before reaching his destination. “It’s a disagreeable job at best,” murmured the hammer-thrower, “but I suppose I ought to see it through.”
“Of course.” The other got it. Bob was strong and might rethink things and be less docile before they arrived. “It’s a tough job at best,” the hammer-thrower said quietly, “but I guess I should follow it through.”
“It’s nice of you,” said Miss Gerald in a low dull tone.
“It’s nice of you,” said Miss Gerald in a flat, low tone.
A moment Bob’s eyes gleamed dangerously, then he seemed to realize the presence of Miss Gerald’s other guests once more and his handsome blond head dropped. “I guess it’s your turn,” he said to the hammer-man.
A moment later, Bob’s eyes shimmered with a dangerous glint, but then he seemed to remember that Miss Gerald’s other guests were around and his handsome blond head dropped. “I guess it’s your turn,” he said to the guy with the hammer.
Miss Dolly looked at the composed proud girl with the “heart of stone.” The temperamental little thing’s hands were tightly closed. Suddenly once more she bent over to whisper—this time viciously—to Miss Gerald. “He kisses beautifully,” she breathed. “And—and I hate you!” Miss Gerald did not answer; nor did she turn to regard Bob who quietly moved away now with the monocle-man and the hammer-thrower.
Miss Dolly looked at the composed, proud girl with the “heart of stone.” The temperamental little one’s hands were tightly clenched. Suddenly, she leaned in again to whisper—this time with malice—to Miss Gerald. “He kisses beautifully,” she said. “And—and I hate you!” Miss Gerald didn’t respond; she also didn’t turn to look at Bob, who quietly walked away now with the monocle guy and the hammer thrower.
CHAPTER XXII—A REAL BENEFACTOR
Bob, the hammer-thrower and the monocle-man together entered the little station-house in the village. It wasn’t much of a lock-up, but it was big enough to hold Bob and a few others, one of whom had just been released as the trio of new-comers walked in. His eye fell on Bob.
Bob, the hammer-thrower, and the guy with the monocle walked into the small station house in the village. It wasn’t much of a lock-up, but it was big enough to hold Bob and a few others, one of whom had just been released as the three newcomers entered. He noticed Bob.
“That’s my man,” he exclaimed excitedly. “That’s my escaped patient.”
"That’s my guy," he shouted with excitement. "That’s my escaped patient."
“Yes, that’s he!” affirmed a second voice—that of the commodore.
“Yes, that’s him!” confirmed a second voice—that of the commodore.
“Got him this time!” came jubilantly from another side of the bare room, and Bob gazing, with no show of emotion, in that direction, discovered Dickie and Clarence were there too.
“Got him this time!” came excitedly from the other side of the empty room, and Bob, looking over with no sign of emotion, saw that Dickie and Clarence were there too.
“Put me in the padded cell, would you?” said the maniac-medico furiously. “I’ll see where you go. Come on. The car is waiting. There won’t be any window-bouquets this time, I promise you.”
“Put me in the padded cell, will you?” said the crazy doctor angrily. “I'll see where you go. Come on. The car is waiting. There won’t be any window bouquets this time, I promise you.”
Bob didn’t answer. He didn’t much care what they said.
Bob didn’t respond. He didn’t really care what they said.
“I got Gee-gee on the phone,” went on Dan viciously, “and she has it all down in black and white, she tells me. The legal light up there has attended to that. A parcel of outrageous falsehoods! The audacity of that girl, too! When I showed her the enormity of her conduct, she only gave a merry little laugh. Said she was terribly fond of me, the minx! And would I come and sit in the front row when she was a bright and scintillating star?”
“I got Gee-gee on the phone,” Dan continued fiercely, “and she tells me she has everything documented. The lawyer up there took care of that. A bunch of outrageous lies! That girl has some nerve! When I pointed out how bad her behavior was, she just laughed, all cheerful like. Said she really liked me, the little troublemaker! And asked if I’d come sit in the front row when she was a shining star.”
“And she said Gid-up wanted to know if I wouldn’t like to gaze upon that cute little freckle once more?” added Clarence in choked tones.
“And she said Gid-up wanted to know if I wouldn’t like to see that cute little freckle one more time?” added Clarence in choked tones.
“And all that, on account of you!” exclaimed the commodore, throwing out his arms and looking at the culprit. Dickie didn’t say anything at the moment. He only glared.
“And all that, because of you!” shouted the commodore, throwing out his arms and glaring at the culprit. Dickie didn’t say anything in that moment. He just glared back.
Bob regarded the three with lack-luster gaze. He felt little interest in them now.
Bob looked at the three with a dull stare. He felt no interest in them now.
“Take him away!” said Dan, breathing hard. “Or I may do him an injury.”
“Take him away!” Dan said, breathing heavily. “Or I might hurt him.”
“Give him what’s coming to him,” breathed Dickie hoarsely. “He’s got my girl hypnotized.”
“Give him what he deserves,” Dickie said hoarsely. “He’s got my girl under his spell.”
“Come on,” said the maniac-medico sternly to Bob. “Let’s waste no more time.”
“Come on,” the crazy doctor said firmly to Bob. “Let’s not waste any more time.”
“Hold on,” spoke the monocle-man quietly. “You are a little premature, gentlemen.”
“Hold on,” said the man with the monocle quietly. “You’re a bit premature, gentlemen.”
“What do you want to butt in for?” demanded the commodore aggressively of the monocle-man.
“What do you want to interrupt for?” the commodore asked aggressively of the man with the monocle.
“Mr. Bennett has accompanied me here as my prisoner. Am I not right?” Appealing to the hammer-thrower.
“Mr. Bennett has come here with me as my prisoner. Am I correct?” She said, turning to the hammer-thrower.
“Correct,” said that gentleman regretfully.
"Correct," said the gentleman regretfully.
“What’s he been doing besides wrecking homes?” asked the commodore.
“What’s he been up to aside from destroying homes?” asked the commodore.
“A few articles of jewelry have been missing at Mrs. Ralston’s,” said the hammer-thrower in that same tone. “It’s a very regrettable affair. Miss Gerald, for example, lost her ring and it was traced to Mr. Bennett.”
“A few pieces of jewelry have gone missing at Mrs. Ralston’s,” said the hammer-thrower in the same tone. “It’s a really unfortunate situation. Miss Gerald, for instance, lost her ring, and it was linked to Mr. Bennett.”
Bob stood it patiently. He wondered if his day would ever come.
Bob waited patiently. He wondered if his day would ever arrive.
“So?— He’s the merry little social-highwayman, is he?” observed Dan. “The best I can say is, don’t make a hero of him. Give him some real, old-fashioned justice.”
“So?— He’s the cheerful little social bandit, is he?” Dan remarked. “All I can say is, don’t turn him into a hero. Give him some real, old-school justice.”
“I’m afraid I can’t honestly extend my sympathy to you,” remarked Clarence to Bob stiffly.
“I’m sorry, but I really can’t genuinely offer my sympathy to you,” Clarence said to Bob stiffly.
“I’m not sorry,” said Dickie frankly. “I’m glad. Anyhow, Miss Dolly will despise you now.” With a ring of triumph in his voice.
“I’m not sorry,” Dickie said honestly. “I’m glad. Anyway, Miss Dolly will look down on you now.” There was a triumphant tone in his voice.
“No, she won’t,” observed Bob, breaking silence for the first time. “It was being what people think I am that made her fall in love with me.” He didn’t want Dickie to feel too good. He remembered that unsportsmanlike punch. “She’s my dear jolly little pal,” Bob went on, “and she wanted to occupy an adjoining cell.”
“No, she won’t,” Bob said, breaking the silence for the first time. “It was the idea of who people think I am that made her fall for me.” He didn’t want Dickie to feel too proud. He remembered that unsportsmanlike punch. “She’s my dear little buddy,” Bob continued, “and she wanted to share a cell next to mine.”
Dickie went up to Bob. “I’d like to give you another,” he said in his nastiest accents.
Dickie walked over to Bob. “I want to give you another one,” he said in his most unpleasant tone.
“Gentlemen! Gentlemen!” It was the voice of the man at the desk. Authority now spoke. Up to now, amazement had held authority tongue-tied. “The prisoner came quietly, Mr. Moriarity?” Authority knew, then, the monocle-man. Evidently the two had a secret understanding. “Has he confessed?” “Not as yet,” said the monocle-man significantly.
“Gentlemen! Gentlemen!” It was the voice of the man at the desk. Authority now spoke. Up to this point, surprise had kept authority silent. “The prisoner came quietly, Mr. Moriarity?” Authority seemed to recognize the monocle-man. Clearly, the two shared a secret understanding. “Has he confessed?” “Not yet,” replied the monocle-man with significance.
“And I’m not going to,” spoke up Bob succinctly to the magistrate. “I’m not guilty.”
“And I’m not going to,” Bob said clearly to the magistrate. “I’m not guilty.”
“Then who is?” asked the monocle-man.
“Then who is?” asked the guy with the monocle.
“You’ve got your hand on his arm,” said Bob in that same forcible manner. The time had come for him to assert himself, however ridiculous his affirmation might sound. Authority should have the truth. Bob blurted it out fearlessly, holding his head well up as he spoke. “You’ve got your hand on his arm,” he repeated.
“You’re holding his arm,” Bob said with the same intensity. It was time for him to stand up for himself, no matter how silly his statement might seem. Authority deserves the truth. Bob said it boldly, keeping his head held high as he spoke. “You’re holding his arm,” he repeated.
Mr. Moriarity’s reply quite took their breath away, especially Bob’s. “Guess you’re right,” he said promptly, and something bright gleamed in his hand. “Don’t move,” he said to the hammer-thrower.
Mr. Moriarity’s response completely shocked them, especially Bob. “I guess you’re right,” he said quickly, and something shiny glinted in his hand. “Don’t move,” he told the hammer-thrower.
“But aren’t you going to lock him up at all?” asked the commodore in disappointed tones, indicating Bob, after the monocle-man had shown the hammer-thrower a warrant for his (the hammer-thrower’s) arrest, and had, at the conclusion of certain formalities, caused that dazed and angry individual to be led away.
“But aren’t you going to lock him up at all?” asked the commodore, sounding disappointed as he pointed to Bob, after the monocle-man had shown the hammer-thrower a warrant for his arrest, and had, after completing some formalities, had that confused and angry guy taken away.
“I am certainly not going to lock Mr. Bennett up,” laughed the monocle-man who was in the best of humors.
“I am definitely not going to lock Mr. Bennett up,” laughed the man with the monocle, who was in a great mood.
The coup seemed to him a lovely one. For months he had been on the trail of the hammer-thrower. He told Bob—as dazed and bewildered as the hammer-thrower by the unexpected turn of events—all about it later. He had certainly taken an artistic way to complete the affair. And later, not that night, Bob learned, too, that it was Miss Gerald herself who had suggested the way, she having inherited some of the managerial genius of her father. Maybe, she was not averse to Bob’s suffering a little after the wholly-intolerable way he had comported himself toward her and others of her aunt’s guests. Maybe cruelty had mingled somewhat with retaliation. Proud, regal young womanhood sometimes can be cruel. But Bob probably deserved all those twinges and pangs and mournful emotions she had caused him. No one certainly had ever talked to her as he had done.
The coup seemed really impressive to him. For months he had been tracking the hammer-thrower. He told Bob—who was just as shocked and confused by the unexpected turn of events—all about it later. He had definitely found a creative way to wrap things up. And later, not that night, Bob also found out that it was Miss Gerald herself who had suggested the approach, having inherited some of her father's managerial talent. Maybe she was a bit pleased to see Bob suffer after the completely unacceptable way he had treated her and other guests at her aunt's place. Perhaps a bit of cruelty mixed with the need for revenge. Proud, regal young women can sometimes be harsh. But Bob probably deserved all those twinges, pangs, and sad feelings she had stirred in him. No one had ever spoken to her the way he had.
“May I sit down?” said Bob at length to the magistrate. He felt rather tired.
“Can I sit down?” Bob finally asked the magistrate. He felt quite tired.
Authority gave him permission to sit. “Well, if you’re not going to lock him up,” said that maniac-med., looking viciously at Bob, “I am.”
Authority allowed him to take a seat. “Well, if you’re not going to put him away,” said that maniac doctor, shooting a nasty look at Bob, “I will.”
“No, you’re not,” observed the monocle-man easily. “Mr. Bennett is my friend. He has helped me immensely in this affair. Had he not projected his rather impetuous personality into it, certain difficulties would not have been smoothed out so easily. He created a diversion which threw the prisoner, naturally deep and resourceful, somewhat off his guard. But for Mr. Bennett’s whimsical and, at times, diverting conduct,” with a smile at Bob, “my fight against him,” nodding toward the cell, “might not have culminated quite so soon. So,” he added to the enraged medico, “Mr. Bennett has my full moral support, and, I may say,” touching the pocket into which he had returned that something bright, “my physical support as well.” “But what about the treatment I have received?” stormed the med. “Locked up like—?”
“No, you’re not,” the man with the monocle said casually. “Mr. Bennett is my friend. He’s helped me a lot in this situation. If he hadn't thrown his rather impulsive personality into it, we wouldn’t have resolved certain challenges so easily. He created a distraction that caught the prisoner, who is typically clever and resourceful, a bit off guard. Without Mr. Bennett’s quirky and sometimes entertaining behavior,” he smiled at Bob, “my struggle against him,” nodding toward the cell, “might not have come to an end quite so quickly. So,” he added, turning to the furious doctor, “Mr. Bennett has my complete moral support, and I should mention,” he touched the pocket where he had put away that bright object, “my physical support too.” “But what about the treatment I’ve received?” the doctor shouted. “Locked up like—?”
“You shouldn’t have been prowling around. Anyhow, I shall advise my good friend, Mr. Bennett, that should you seek to annoy him further, or to lay a single finger on him, he will have an excellent case for damages. I can explain away a great deal that is inexplicable to the rest of you, and that explanation will serve fully to rehabilitate Mr. Bennett in the esteem of certain people as a not unnormal person. How far I can restore his popularity,” with a laugh, “is another matter.”
“You shouldn’t have been wandering around. Anyway, I’ll let my good friend, Mr. Bennett, know that if you try to bother him again or even touch him, he’ll have a strong case for damages. I can clarify a lot of things that seem confusing to the rest of you, and that explanation will fully help Mr. Bennett regain his reputation as a perfectly normal person. How much I can boost his popularity,” with a laugh, “is a different story.”
Bob stared straight ahead. “How did you do it?” he said to the monocle-man. “What made you certain?”
Bob looked straight ahead. “How did you do it?” he asked the man with the monocle. “What made you so sure?”
“I saw him place the ring in your pocket. Feel here,” walking over to Bob. The latter felt where the other indicated. “A little vest-pocket camera!” said the monocle-man softly. “I photographed the act—the outstretched hand with the ring in it!—you, unsuspecting, half sprawling over the green felt of the table! your coat tails inviting the ring—Besides, one of my men took the place of that outside-operator and received a certain little article of jewelry that night you came blundering back to Mrs. Ralston’s. We nabbed the outside-operator and—well, he’s told certain things.” With satisfaction. “We have, in short, a clear case.”
“I saw him put the ring in your pocket. Check here,” he said, walking over to Bob. Bob felt the spot he pointed to. “A little pocket camera!” said the guy with the monocle softly. “I caught the moment—the outstretched hand with the ring in it!—you, totally unsuspecting, half sprawled over the green felt of the table! Your coat tails practically inviting the ring—Also, one of my guys took the place of that outside operator and received a certain little piece of jewelry the night you came stumbling back to Mrs. Ralston’s. We caught the outside operator and—well, he’s revealed some details.” With satisfaction. “In short, we have a solid case.”
Bob held his head. “It’s whirling,” he said. “I’ll get some things straightened out after a little, I suppose.”
Bob held his head. “It’s spinning,” he said. “I’ll sort some things out soon, I guess.”
“That’s right,” observed the monocle-man.
"Exactly," said the monocle man.
“There are some things you can’t straighten out,” said Dan in an ugly tone. “This is all very well for you, but what about us?”
“There are some things you can’t fix,” said Dan in a harsh tone. “This is great for you, but what about us?”
Just at that moment there was a flutter of skirts at the door.
Just then, there was a rustle of skirts at the door.
Gee-gee and Gid-up came in, the former in a state of great agitation.
Gee-gee and Gid-up came in, the former really worked up.
“How dared you?” she gasped, going up to the monocle-man and standing with arms akimbo.
“How could you?” she gasped, approaching the man with the monocle and standing with her hands on her hips.
“Send you that note, commanding your presence here?” said the monocle-man. “I dared, my dear,” he added slowly, “because I hold the cards.”
“Send you that note, asking you to be here?” said the man with the monocle. “I took the liberty, my dear,” he continued slowly, “because I have the upper hand.”
“Don’t you ‘dear’ me,” she retorted stormily.
“Don’t you ‘dear’ me,” she shot back angrily.
“I wouldn’t, seriously,” he returned. “It might be dangerous. Women like you are dangerous, you know. I fancy our friends here,” glancing toward the commodore and Clarence, “have found that out. But it will be a lesson. ‘We’ll never wander more from our own fireside,’” he hummed.
“I wouldn’t, honestly,” he replied. “It could be risky. Women like you can be dangerous, you know. I think our friends here,” he glanced at the commodore and Clarence, “have learned that. But it’ll be a lesson. ‘We’ll never stray too far from our own fireside,’” he hummed.
“Well,” said Gee-gee, shaking her auburn tresses, “those were pretty bold statements of what you could do to me, in that note you sent.”
“Well,” said Gee-gee, shaking her auburn hair, “those were some pretty bold claims about what you could do to me in that note you sent.”
“They were true, my dear.”
"They were real, my dear."
The green eyes flared. Gee-gee was shaking all over. Gid-up looked rather frightened.
The green eyes widened. Gee-gee was trembling all over. Gid-up looked pretty scared.
“Take it easy,” said the monocle-man.
“Take it easy,” said the guy with the monocle.
“I’d like to see you prove what you can do,” she returned. “You say I have framed-up a lot of false-hoods—a tissue of lies—in that affidavit the lawyer at Mrs. Ralston’s drew up. I tell you they’re all true.” Dan looked weak. “Everything I’ve told happened just at I said it did, and he knows it.” Pointing a finger at the commodore.
“I want you to show me what you can do,” she replied. “You claim I’ve created a bunch of falsehoods—a web of lies—in that affidavit the lawyer at Mrs. Ralston’s put together. I assure you they’re all true.” Dan looked shaky. “Everything I’ve said happened exactly as I described, and he knows it.” She pointed a finger at the commodore.
“I wonder if I ought not to put you in jail now?” said the monocle-man meditatively. “There’s a cell vacant next to the hammer-thrower. You would be congenial spirits.”
“I wonder if I should just put you in jail right now?” said the monocle man, thinking aloud. “There’s an empty cell next to the hammer-thrower. You two would get along well.”
“It’s proofs I’m asking, Mr. Detective,” retorted Gee-gee, apparently not greatly abashed by this threat. She was accustomed to hitting back.
“It’s proof I’m asking for, Mr. Detective,” replied Gee-gee, seemingly unfazed by the threat. She was used to fighting back.
“Yes, it’s proofs,” said Gid-up, but in weaker accents.
“Yes, it’s proofs,” Gid-up said, but his voice was weaker.
The monocle-man shook a reproving finger at Gid-up. “You’re in bad company, my dear,” he observed. “You’re out of Gee-gee’s class. You’re just trying to be in it.”
The monocle-man shook a disapproving finger at Gid-up. “You’re in the wrong crowd, my dear,” he said. “You’re not on Gee-gee’s level. You’re just pretending to be.”
“I don’t want any of your impertinence,” answered Gid-up with a faint imitation of Gee-gee’s manner. “He’s a proper bad one.” Pointing to Clarence who presented a picture of abject misery. “And when I tell all the things he done to me—”
“I don’t want any of your disrespect,” Gid-up replied with a weak copy of Gee-gee’s style. “He’s really no good.” He pointed to Clarence, who looked absolutely miserable. “And when I share all the things he’s done to me—”
“But you won’t tell them.”
“But you won't tell them.”
“I have.” Defiantly. “In that paper the lawyer drew up.”
“I have.” Defiantly. “In that document the lawyer prepared.”
“But you’re going to sign a little paper I have here, repudiating all that,” he answered her.
“But you’re going to sign this little paper I have here, rejecting all of that,” he replied to her.
“Oh, am I?” Elevating her turned-up nose.
“Oh, am I?” she said, raising her nose in the air.
“You are.” Blandly.
"You are." Uninspired.
“Guess again,” said Gid-up saucily.
“Try again,” said Gid-up cheekily.
“You can’t prove what we told in that affidavit isn’t true,” reaffirmed Gee-gee. Only she and Gid-up could know it was a “frame-up”; they had builded carefully and were sure of their ground. “We know our rights and we’re going to have them. We’re not afraid of you.”
“You can’t prove that what we said in that affidavit isn’t true,” Gee-gee insisted. Only she and Gid-up knew it was a “setup”; they had planned it carefully and were confident in their position. “We know our rights and we’re going to claim them. We’re not afraid of you.”
“Then why are you here?” quietly.
“Then why are you here?” she asked quietly.
“That lawyer at the house said we might as well see you, just to call your bluff. He said, since we had told the truth, we had nothing to fear.”
“That lawyer at the house said we might as well see you, just to call your bluff. He said, since we had told the truth, we had nothing to fear.”
“I don’t think you’re quite so confident as you seem,” observed the monocle-man. “My note awoke a little uneasiness, or you wouldn’t be here. This young lady,” turning to Gid-up, “suffered a mild case of stage fright, if I am any judge of human nature.”
“I don’t think you’re as confident as you appear,” the man with the monocle noted. “My message stirred up a bit of unease, or you wouldn’t be here. This young lady,” he said, turning to Gid-up, “had a bit of stage fright, if I know anything about human nature.”
“Me?” said Gid-up. “I defy you.”
“Me?” said Gid-up. “I challenge you.”
“Here’s the answer,” replied the monocle-man, taking another paper from his pocket.
“Here’s the answer,” said the man with the monocle, pulling another piece of paper from his pocket.
“What’s that?” said Gee-gee scornfully. “I suppose it’s some lies from him.” Alluding to the commodore. “The lawyer told me to be prepared for them.”
“What’s that?” Gee-gee said dismissively. “I guess it’s some lies from him.” She was referring to the commodore. “The lawyer told me to expect them.”
“No; it isn’t that. It’s only a stenographic report of a conversation you and your friend had together in your room, the night you arrived at Mrs. Ralston’s.”
“No; that’s not it. It’s just a typed record of a conversation you and your friend had in your room on the night you got to Mrs. Ralston’s.”
“A stenographic report? Nonsense!” Sharply. Gee-gee remembered all about that conversation. “How could you—”
“A stenographic report? That’s ridiculous!” he said sharply. Gee-gee remembered everything about that conversation. “How could you—”
“There’s a dictograph in the room you occupied, my dear,” observed the monocle-man.
“There's a listening device in the room you were in, my dear,” the man with the monocle pointed out.
“A dic—” Gee-gee seemed to turn green. “Good Gawd!” she said.
“A dick—” Gee-gee looked like she was about to be sick. “Oh my God!” she said.
It wasn’t very long thereafter that Gee-gee and Gid-up departed.
It wasn't long after that Gee-gee and Gid-up left.
“Back to the old life!” said Gee-gee wearily. “And just when I thought my ambition to be a star was coming true.”
“Back to the old life!” said Gee-gee tiredly. “And just when I thought my dream of being a star was actually happening.”
“Life is sure tough,” observed Gid-up, abandoning her society manner.
“Life is definitely tough,” noticed Gid-up, dropping her formal tone.
“I’m sick of the whole thing. Got a mind to jump in the river.”
“I’m tired of the whole situation. I'm thinking about jumping in the river.”
“Gas for me!” from poor Gid-up wearily.
“Gas for me!” said poor Gid-up wearily.
“No, you won’t. And I won’t. We’ll just go on. Lord! how long.”
“No, you won’t. And I won’t. We’ll just keep going. God! how long.”
“Anyhow, that detective promised to introduce us to a real Russian grand duke who’s in old New York. Maybe we can get in the papers on that.”
“Anyway, that detective promised to introduce us to a real Russian grand duke who’s in old New York. Maybe we can make the news with that.”
“Perhaps.” More thoughtfully from Gee-gee. “It wasn’t so worse of the detective to promise that, after he’d got us down and walked on us.”
“Maybe.” Gee-gee said more thoughtfully. “It wasn’t too bad of the detective to promise that after he’d gotten us down and walked on us.”
“You must make dukie drink out of your slipper,” suggested Gid-up. “The detective said he was mad after beautiful stage girls. Grand dukes always are.” Hopefully. “And if you do make him do that, it would be heralded from coast to coast.”
“You should make dukie drink out of your slipper,” suggested Gid-up. “The detective said he was crazy about gorgeous stage girls. Grand dukes always are.” Hopefully. “And if you get him to do that, it would be talked about everywhere.”
“It’s as good as done,” said Gee-gee confidently. “It’ll prove me a great actress, sure.” In a brighter tone.
“It’s as good as done,” Gee-gee said confidently. “It’ll definitely show I’m a great actress.” In a brighter tone.
“I always said you had talent,” remarked Gid-up.
“I always said you had talent,” Gid-up said.
“Cheese it,” retorted Gee-gee elegantly. “Ain’t you the fond flatterer!”
“Hold on,” Gee-gee replied gracefully. “Aren’t you the charming flatterer!”
“Anyhow, I’m glad I don’t have to do society talk any more,” said Gid-up, and stuck a piece of gum in her mouth.
“Anyway, I’m glad I don’t have to do small talk anymore,” said Gid-up, popping a piece of gum into her mouth.
“Yes,” said Gee-gee, “my jaws is most broke.”
“Yes,” said Gee-gee, “my jaw is almost broken.”
“Maybe you’d better tighten up your hobble a little for dukie,” suggested Gid-up.
“Maybe you should tighten your hobble a bit for dukie,” suggested Gid-up.
“Have to stand still the rest of my life if I did,” observed Gee-gee, swishing along about six inches a step.
“Have to stand still the rest of my life if I did,” commented Gee-gee, gliding along about six inches at a time.
“You could divide it a little.”
“You could split it a bit.”
“So I could.”
"Yeah, I could."
By this time they had forgotten about the river, or taking gas. The duke had already become a real person in their lives and they talked on, devising stunts for his Vivacious Greatness. By this time, too, the monocle-man seemed to them a real benefactor.
By this point, they had completely forgotten about the river or getting gas. The duke had genuinely become a part of their lives, and they chatted away, brainstorming ideas for his Vivacious Greatness. Also, by now, the monocle-man seemed like a true benefactor to them.
Meanwhile the “real benefactor” had been reading from that stenographic report to Dan and the others. The commodore nearly jumped out of his boots for joy.
Meanwhile, the “real benefactor” had been reading from that stenographic report to Dan and the others. The commodore nearly jumped out of his shoes with joy.
“Read that again,” he said.
"Read that again," he said.
The monocle-man, reading: “‘This ain’t half bad enough. You think up something now, Gee-gee.’
The monocle guy, reading: “‘This isn’t half bad enough. You come up with something now, Gee-gee.’”
“‘Doping a poor little thing is always good stuff to spring on a jury, Gid-up. And you could make yourself up young with your hair done up in a pigtail, with a cute little baby-blue bow on the end.’
“‘Doping a poor little thing is always good material to spring on a jury, Gid-up. And you could make yourself look young with your hair styled in a pigtail, complete with a cute little baby-blue bow on the end.’”
“‘But that sounds old, Gee-gee. You can sure invent something new—’” etc., etc.
“‘But that sounds outdated, Gee-gee. You can definitely come up with something new—’” etc., etc.
The monocle-man finished reading and laid down the paper. “There you are, gentlemen,” he observed in a lively tone. “The stenographers will swear to that. They were dressed as house-maids, but at night and on certain occasions, they used one of the rooms Mrs. Ralston placed at my disposal as an office. When I came down here I didn’t expect to be involved in a domestic drama. It rather forced itself upon me. It came as part of the day’s work. I overheard your conversation with Miss Dolly that night.” Significantly to Bob. That young gentleman flushed.
The monocle-wearing man finished reading and put down the paper. “Well, there you have it, gentlemen,” he said cheerfully. “The stenographers will back that up. They were dressed as maids, but at night and on certain occasions, they used one of the rooms that Mrs. Ralston allowed me to use as an office. When I got here, I didn't think I'd be caught up in a family drama. It kind of forced its way into my life. It was part of the day's work. I overheard your conversation with Miss Dolly that night.” This was significant for Bob. That young man turned red.
“I have taken the liberty of destroying the report of that conversation, I may add. Miss Dolly is charming.” With a smile. “I, also, had a record of your conversation with these three gentlemen”—indicating Dan, Clarence and Dickie—“after they entered your room one night, via the trellis and the window. That conversation introduced me into the domestic drama. I became an actor in it whether I would or not. But for my whispered instructions to one of my assistants in the garden, you three gentlemen would have been arrested.” Dan stared at Clarence in momentary consternation. “You did not need the golf-club because my man removed the dog.”
“I took the liberty of getting rid of the report on that conversation, just so you know. Miss Dolly is delightful.” With a smile. “I also had a record of your chat with these three gentlemen”—pointing to Dan, Clarence, and Dickie—“after they sneaked into your room one night through the trellis and the window. That conversation pulled me into the family drama. I became a player in it whether I liked it or not. If it weren't for my quiet instructions to one of my assistants in the garden, you three gentlemen would have been arrested.” Dan looked at Clarence in brief shock. “You didn't need the golf club because my guy took care of the dog.”
“It seems,” said Dan effusively to the monocle-man, “you have been our good angel. If any remuneration—?”
“It seems,” Dan said enthusiastically to the man with the monocle, “you’ve been our good angel. If there’s any payment—?”
“No,” answered the monocle-man. “What I have done for you was only incidental and my reward was the enjoyment I got out of the affair—in watching how the threads crossed and recrossed, and how they tangled and untangled. It was better than going to a show. It made work a pleasure. Besides, I shall be well rewarded for what I have accomplished in another direction.” Looking toward the cell.
“No,” replied the man with the monocle. “What I did for you was just incidental, and my reward was the enjoyment I got from it—watching how the threads intertwined, tangled, and untangled. It was more entertaining than going to a show. It made work enjoyable. Plus, I’ll be well rewarded for what I’ve achieved in another way.” He looked toward the cell.
“I tried to get him in England and failed. In France, the story was the same. He is rather a remarkable personality. A born criminal and an actor, as well! Of good family, he wedged his way into society, through the all-round amateur athletic route. He was generally well liked.” Bob thought of Miss Gerald and looked down. He couldn’t help wondering if she would not greatly have preferred his (Bob’s) occupying that cell, instead of the other man who had seemed to interest her so much.
“I tried to get him in England and failed. In France, it was the same story. He’s quite a remarkable person. A born criminal and an actor, too! From a good family, he blended into society through the amateur athletic scene. He was generally well-liked.” Bob thought of Miss Gerald and looked down. He couldn’t help but wonder if she would have much preferred him (Bob) occupying that cell instead of the other man who had seemed to interest her so much.
“Now for Mrs. Dan,” observed the commodore, jubilantly waving the stenographic report. “This will bring her to time.”
“Now for Mrs. Dan,” said the commodore, happily waving the stenographic report. “This will get her in line.”
“And my wife, too!” said Clarence with equal joy.
“And my wife, too!” Clarence said, just as happily.
“I thought I would save you gentlemen some trouble and so have already placed the report in the ladies’ hands,” said the monocle-man affably. “Indeed, they came to me afterward and told me they had been shamefully deceived. Mrs. Dan looked as if she had had a good cry—from joy, no doubt. Mrs. Clarence’s voice was tremulous. Same cause, I am sure. I think you will find them contrite and anxious to make up.”
“I thought I’d save you guys some trouble and already handed the report to the ladies,” said the guy in the monocle cheerfully. “Actually, they came to see me afterward and said they’d been really misled. Mrs. Dan looked like she’d just had a good cry—from happiness, I’m sure. Mrs. Clarence’s voice was shaky. Same reason, I bet. I think you’ll find them sorry and eager to make amends.”
“This is great,” said Dan.
"This is awesome," said Dan.
“Glorious!” observed Clarence.
“Awesome!” observed Clarence.
“Think of it! No public disgrace!”
“Can you believe it? No public shame!”
“No being held up as monsters in the press!”
“No one should be depicted as monsters in the media!”
“It’s too good to be true.” The commodore threw out his arms and advanced toward the monocle-man.
“It’s too good to be true.” The commodore spread his arms and walked toward the man with the monocle.
But the latter waved him away. “Save your embraces for your wives,” he observed.
But the latter waved him off. “Save your hugs for your wives,” he said.
“I love all the world,” said Dan.
“I love the whole world,” said Dan.
“Me, too!” from Clarence.
“Same here!” from Clarence.
“I presume I am free to take my departure, gentlemen?” said Bob, rising.
“I guess I can leave now, gentlemen?” said Bob, standing up.
“You are free as the birds of the air for all of me,” answered the monocle-man.
“You're as free as the birds in the sky for all of me,” replied the monocle man.
“Hold on one moment,” begged the commodore. “No; I’m not going to detain you forcibly. As a friend I ask you to wait.” Bob paused. “I’m a good fellow,” said Dan effusively, “and I don’t wish the world harm. I don’t want you to go wandering around any more as you are. Why, you’re a regular Frankenstein. You’re an iron automaton that goes about trampling on people. After all I’ve gone through, I have charity toward others. I won’t have you treading on people’s finer sensibilities and smashing connubial peace and comfort all to splinters.”
“Just give me a moment,” the commodore pleaded. “No; I’m not going to hold you back forcefully. As a friend, I’m asking you to wait.” Bob paused. “I’m a nice guy,” Dan said eagerly, “and I don’t want to harm anyone. I don’t want you to keep wandering around like this. Seriously, you’re like a real-life Frankenstein. You’re a metal machine that goes around crushing people. After everything I’ve been through, I try to be understanding toward others. I won’t let you stomp on people’s feelings and ruin their marriages and happiness into pieces.”
“But what can I do?” suggested Bob. He meant the three weeks weren’t yet up.
“But what can I do?” Bob suggested. He meant that the three weeks weren’t up yet.
“Here’s what I propose to Clarence and Dickie. I see now you’ll win, anyhow. You’ve got the grit and the nerve. So as long as we have simply got to pay in the end, why not do so at once and so spare others? That’ll be the way I’ll pay him.” Alluding to the monocle-man. “It’s my way of showing my gratitude for what he’s done. And now I think of it, I can’t see that I ought to blame you so much, Bob, for all that has transpired.”
“Here’s what I’m suggesting to Clarence and Dickie. I can see now that you’re going to win, no matter what. You’ve got the determination and the guts. So since we have to pay in the end anyway, why not just do it now and spare others? That’s how I’m going to pay him.” Referring to the monocle guy. “It’s my way of showing appreciation for what he’s done. And now that I think about it, I don’t see that I should blame you so much, Bob, for everything that’s happened.”
“Oh, you don’t?” With faint irony.
“Oh, you don’t?” she said with a hint of irony.
“No; you only did what you had to, and maybe we were a little rough. Forget it.” The commodore extended his hand.
“Not really; you just did what you needed to do, and yeah, we might have been a bit harsh. Let it go.” The commodore reached out his hand.
The act melted Bob. He took it. “Good friends, once more!” chirped Dan, and extended an arm to include Clarence. “You’ve won. The money’s fairly yours, Bob. Only as a personal favor, I ask you to be, at once, as you were. Be your old natural self immediately.”
The act melted Bob. He accepted it. “Good friends, once more!” chirped Dan, extending an arm to include Clarence. “You’ve won. The money’s fairly yours, Bob. Just as a personal favor, I ask you to be, right now, as you were. Be your old natural self immediately.”
“I’ll pay my share to have him that way again,” said Clarence heartily. “I want to spare the world too. Besides, he’s won all right enough.”
“I'll pitch in my part to have him like that again,” said Clarence enthusiastically. “I want to help the world too. Plus, he’s definitely earned it.”
“It’s three weeks or nothing from me,” said Dickie. “You chaps may want to spare the world, but I don’t want to spare him.”
“It’s three weeks or nothing from me,” said Dickie. “You guys may want to save the world, but I don’t want to save him.”
“I’ll pay for Dickie,” replied good old Dan. “And gladly!”
“I'll pay for Dickie,” said good old Dan. “And happily!”
Dickie shrugged. Dan wrote out a check. “Congratulations!” he said. “And for us, too!” Turning to Clarence. “Think of the thousands in alimony it might have cost us!”
Dickie shrugged. Dan wrote out a check. “Congrats!” he said. “And for us, too!” He turned to Clarence. “Just think of the thousands in alimony it could have cost us!”
“We’ve simply got to call a halt on old Bob,” said Clarence fervently. “Bet’s off! We lose.”
“We’ve just got to put a stop to old Bob,” Clarence said passionately. “The bet’s off! We lost.”
Bob took the check. “I believe I am entitled to it, for I certainly would have stuck it out now. I am sure I wouldn’t do it all over again, though, for ten times the amount. Nevertheless, I thank you.” He shook himself. “Free! Isn’t it great? Will you do something for me?” To the monocle-man.
Bob took the check. “I think I deserve this, because I definitely would have held on until now. I'm pretty sure I wouldn’t go through it all again, even for ten times the amount. Still, I appreciate it.” He shook himself. “Free! Isn’t that amazing? Can you do something for me?” he said to the man with the monocle.
“Gladly,” was the reply. “I was secretly informed of that wager of yours and I was immensely interested in your little social experiment. You see I make my living by prevarication and subterfuges. And that”—with a laugh—“is more than a man can make by telling the truth. It’s a wicked world. Fraud and humbug are trumps.”
“Sure,” was the reply. “I was tipped off about that bet of yours and I found your little social experiment really intriguing. You see, I earn my living by lying and deception. And that”—with a laugh—“is more than a person can make by being honest. It’s a tough world. Deceit and nonsense are what people value.”
“What I want you to do,” said Bob, ignoring this homily, “is to express my grip to New York. Also, tell Miss Gerald that I’ve gone and kindly thank Mrs Ralston and Miss Gerald for asking me down.”
“What I want you to do,” said Bob, ignoring this lecture, “is to let New York know about my situation. Also, tell Miss Gerald that I’ve left and please thank Mrs. Ralston and Miss Gerald for inviting me here.”
“Why don’t you thank them yourself?”
“Why don’t you thank them yourself?”
“I think they would be more pleased if I complied with the formalities by proxy.”
“I think they would be happier if I followed the formalities through someone else.”
“Shall I add you had a charming time?”
“Should I mention that you had a lovely time?”
“You may use your own judgment.”
“You can use your own judgment.”
Bob walked to the door.
Bob headed to the door.
“I guess it’s I who am crazy,” said the maniac-doctor, again waking up.
“I guess I'm the crazy one,” said the maniac doctor, waking up again.
CHAPTER XXIII—MAKING GOOD
Bob sent dad a modest-sized check the next day. “Result of hustling,” he wrote. “Spend freely. There’ll be more coming presently.” Then Bob went down on the narrow road that isn’t straight, but that has a crook in it. He stopped somewhere near the crook, and entering an office greeted a melancholy-looking man who had “bad business” and “country going to pot” written all over his face. The melancholy man was a club acquaintance.
Bob sent Dad a decent-sized check the next day. “Just the result of hard work,” he wrote. “Spend it freely. There’ll be more coming soon.” Then Bob walked down the narrow, winding road. He stopped near a bend and, entering an office, greeted a sad-looking man who had “bad business” and “the countryside is going downhill” written all over his face. The sad man was someone Bob knew from the club.
“What’s the most abused and worst thing on the street that isn’t straight?” said Bob debonairly.
“What’s the most abused and worst thing on the street that isn’t straight?” Bob said with a charming smile.
“That’s right. Call us names,” replied the melancholy man with a sigh. “Everybody’s doing it.”
"That's right. Go ahead and call us names," the sad man replied with a sigh. "Everyone's doing it."
“Have you got something so awful people turn their heads away when you speak of it?”
“Do you have something so terrible that people turn away when you talk about it?”
“There’s the Utopian,” observed the other. “Only a buzzard would get near it.”
“There's the Utopian,” the other person remarked. “Only a buzzard would go near it.”
“Do they call the promoter a thief?”
“Do they call the promoter a scammer?”
“They do.”
“They absolutely do.”
“And is he crazy?”
"Is he crazy?"
“He is. It’s either jail or a lunatic asylum for him.”
“He is. It’s either jail or a mental health facility for him.”
Bob handed what was left of the commodore’s check to the melancholy man. “Buy Utopian,” he said.
Bob handed what was left of the commodore’s check to the sad man. “Buy Utopian,” he said.
“All right,” answered the melancholy man listlessly. He was beyond feeling any emotion.
“All right,” replied the gloomy man with no enthusiasm. He was beyond feeling any emotion.
“I believe in Utopian,” observed Bob. “I have here,” touching his forehead, “inside information that it is an excellent little railroad property.”
“I believe in Utopian,” Bob said. “I have here,” he said, touching his head, “inside info that it’s a great little railroad property.”
“Oh, it isn’t a railroad,” said the melancholy man. “It’s—”
“Oh, it’s not a railroad,” said the sad man. “It’s—”
“Don’t tell me what it is,” retorted Bob. “Repeat some of those things the world calls the promoter.”
“Don’t tell me what it is,” Bob shot back. “Just say some of those things the world calls the promoter.”
The melancholy man was obliging.
The sad man was kind.
“Heavens! He must be an awful honest man!” said Bob and started toward the door, where he turned. “Pyramid with the profits.” And Bob walked out.
“Heavens! He must be a really honest guy!” said Bob as he moved toward the door, then he paused. “Pyramid with the profits.” And Bob walked out.
That afternoon he went to a real-estate man and asked where he could lease a small factory. While at college he had invented a small appliance for automobiles, which he felt sure was good and would commend itself to manufacturers. Bob knew about all there was to know about a car. After he had looked at several old deserted buildings on the outskirts, any one of which might answer his purpose, Bob strolled into a number of automobile agencies near Columbus Square, and showed them his little patent. The men in charge were willing to express an opinion; several appeared interested. Of course, Bob would ultimately have to go to the “higher-ups,” but he wanted first to find out what these practical chaps thought. One of them even asked Bob if he wanted a partner? Bob didn’t. He had all the capital needed, he replied.
That afternoon, he went to a real estate agent and asked where he could rent a small factory. While in college, he had invented a small device for cars that he was sure was good and would appeal to manufacturers. Bob knew everything there was to know about cars. After checking out several old abandoned buildings on the outskirts that could work for him, Bob wandered into a few car dealerships near Columbus Square and showed them his little patent. The guys in charge were willing to share their thoughts; several seemed interested. Of course, Bob would eventually have to talk to the "higher-ups," but he wanted to know what these practical guys thought first. One of them even asked Bob if he wanted a partner. Bob didn’t. He had all the capital he needed, he replied.
He was taking a serious sober view of life now. He felt himself no longer “darn fool Bob,” or careless Bob, or lazy Bob. He might have done something with his little device long ago, but he had forgotten all about it. Its creation had been a passing whim. Bob really had a good head for machinery though, and now he was beginning to feel out his path. He wanted to work hard, too, which was a novel sensation. It felt, also, like a permanent sensation. Meeting several chaps, he refused their invitations to partake of the sparkling, much to their surprise, as heretofore he had been a prince of good fellows. Henceforth, however, he was going to be king of himself.
He was looking at life seriously now. He no longer felt like “foolish Bob,” or careless Bob, or lazy Bob. He could have done something with his little invention a while ago, but he had completely forgotten about it. It was just a fleeting thought when he created it. Bob really had a knack for machines, though, and now he was starting to find his direction. He wanted to work hard too, which was a new feeling for him. It also felt like it would be a lasting feeling. When he met several guys, he turned down their offers to drink, surprising them since he had always been the life of the party. From now on, though, he was going to be in charge of himself.
That night, in the old home, in the old square, Dolly called him up by telephone.
That night, in the old house, in the old square, Dolly called him on the phone.
“How could you disappoint me so!” said jolly little pal. “The idea of your just pretending to be a burglar.”
“How could you disappoint me like this!” said the cheerful little friend. “The thought of you just pretending to be a burglar.”
“Me, pretend?” Bob laughed. “I say, that’s good. Didn’t I tell you all along I wasn’t?”
“Me, pretend?” Bob laughed. “I mean, that's funny. Didn’t I tell you all along I wasn’t?”
“But why didn’t you make me believe you weren’t?” retorted little pal reproachfully. “To think of your deceiving me like that!”
“But why didn’t you make me believe you weren’t?” the little friend shot back, clearly upset. “I can’t believe you deceived me like that!”
“Deceive you? That’s good, too. Why, I told you again and again I was just a plain ordinary person. You were just bound to idealize me!”
“Deceive you? That’s good too. I told you over and over that I was just an ordinary person. You were just destined to put me on a pedestal!”
There was a brief pause. “Are you so disappointed in me, you are going to disown me now?” continued Bob.
There was a brief pause. “Are you really so disappointed in me that you’re going to disown me now?” Bob continued.
“No-a. I’m still your jolly little pal. Only to think though, there never was a chance for those adjoining cells, after all!”
“No-a. I’m still your cheerful little friend. Just think, there never was a chance for those connected cells, after all!”
“Well, there seemed a good chance, anyhow.”
“Well, there seemed to be a good chance, anyway.”
“Yes, it was nice and exciting while it lasted.” The temperamental little thing sighed. “It’s awful humdrum up here now.”
“Yes, it was nice and exciting while it lasted,” the temperamental little thing sighed. “It’s so boring up here now.”
Bob didn’t ask any questions about the people up there. “You ought to have fallen in love with the hammer-thrower,” he said. “He was the real thing.”
Bob didn’t ask anything about the people up there. “You should have fallen for the hammer-thrower,” he said. “He was the real deal.”
“I suppose I should have,” she seemed to agree. “Wasn’t I stupid? Never mind. Say something nice.”
“I guess I should have,” she seemed to agree. “Wasn’t I such an idiot? Forget it. Just say something nice.”
“Like you,” said Bob.
“Just like you,” said Bob.
“Heaps? I need cheering.”
"Lots? I need a pick-me-up."
“Heaps.”
“Lots.”
“Much obliged. You’re awfully good. What are you doing this evening?”
“Thanks a lot. You're really kind. What are you up to this evening?”
“I was sitting by the fire in dad’s old-fashioned den, thinking and dreaming.”
“I was sitting by the fire in my dad’s vintage den, lost in thought and daydreaming.”
“All alone?”
"All by yourself?"
“Entirely.”
"Completely."
“What were you thinking of?”
“What were you thinking?”
“Machinery. And a factory.”
“Machines. And a factory.”
“And will it have a tall chimney that belches smoke?”
"And will it have a tall chimney that spews smoke?"
“I trust ultimately to attain to the kind of a chimney you refer to. At present, I shall have to content myself with a comparatively insignificant one. I have visions of a chimney four hundred feet high some day.”
“I believe I'll eventually have the kind of chimney you mentioned. For now, I’ll have to settle for a much smaller one. I dream of having a chimney that’s four hundred feet tall someday.”
“Belching ugly smoke?”
"Belching thick smoke?"
“It won’t look ugly to me. It’ll look blissful.”
“It won’t look ugly to me. It’ll look amazing.”
The biggest sigh of all quivered from afar. “Another dream shattered! My! but I’m growing up fast. I feel a million years old. Anyhow, I’ll never marry Dickie.”
The biggest sigh of all came from a distance. “Another dream gone! Wow, I’m growing up fast. I feel like I’ve lived a million years. Anyway, I’m never marrying Dickie.”
“Wouldn’t if I were you. He doesn’t fight fair. Before he got through he’d have all your dad’s chimneys, as well as his own, and then he’d put you on an allowance. You’d have to account for every pin and needle you bought.”
“Honestly, I wouldn’t if I were you. He doesn’t play by the rules. By the time he’s done, he’d take all your dad’s chimneys, in addition to his own, and then he’d put you on a budget. You’d have to justify every pin and needle you bought.”
“Yes; I know. When I do find the right man I’ll bring him to you and let you pass in judgment. You shall tell me whether I can or can’t.”
“Yes; I know. When I find the right guy, I’ll bring him to you and let you decide. You’ll tell me whether I can or can’t.”
“All right—though isn’t that rather a paternal prerogative?”
“All right—though isn’t that kind of a parental privilege?”
“Oh, dad always lets me do what I want. You’re the only man that has ever dared oppose me.”
“Oh, Dad always lets me do what I want. You’re the only guy who’s ever dared to stand up to me.”
“But suppose I did oppose you in a matter of such importance?”
“But what if I actually disagreed with you on something so important?”
Miss Dolly thought. “We won’t cross that bridge before we come to it. You said you were thinking and dreaming. I know what you were thinking about. Now, what were you dreaming about all by your lonely, sitting by the fire?”
Miss Dolly thought, “We won’t worry about that until we get there. You said you were thinking and dreaming. I know what you were thinking about. Now, what were you dreaming about all by yourself, sitting by the fire?”
Bob was glad he didn’t have to blurt out the truth any more. He evaded. “Did I say dreaming?” he asked.
Bob was relieved he didn’t have to spill the truth anymore. He dodged the question. “Did I say dreaming?” he asked.
“You did. Was it of some one?”
“You did. Was it about someone?”
“Pooh! What nonsense!”
"Ugh! What nonsense!"
“Oh, it isn’t nonsense to do that.”
“Oh, that's not nonsense to do.”
“I was only thinking of chimneys and things like that,” returned Bob. That was an out-and-outer. He shuddered to think of the answer he would have had to make a few days ago.
“I was just thinking about chimneys and stuff like that,” replied Bob. That was completely off the wall. He shuddered at the thought of the answer he would have given a few days ago.
“Never mind,” said the jolly little pal. “You needn’t tell me. There are some things we keep locked up, forever and ever, in the inner sanctums of our hearts, aren’t there?” Sadly. “And we die and they are buried with us. Oh, dear! I’m beginning to feel dreadful. Only jolly little pal is awfully sorry.” For him, she meant. Bob winced. “I hate to think of you sitting there, poor dear, all alone, and—and—”
“Forget it,” said the cheerful little friend. “You don’t have to tell me. There are some things we keep locked away forever in the depths of our hearts, right?” Sadly. “And we die, and they’re buried with us. Oh no! I’m starting to feel terrible. Only cheerful little friend is really sorry.” For him, she meant. Bob flinched. “I can’t stand the thought of you sitting there, you poor thing, all alone, and—and—”
“I’m having a bully time—honest,” said Bob. “I really am. I’m planning out my future. I’m going to do something. I’m tired of being nothing. I’ll work right with the workmen at first.”
“I’m having a great time—really,” said Bob. “I truly am. I’m mapping out my future. I’m going to make something of myself. I’m tired of feeling like nothing. I’ll work alongside the laborers at first.”
“And you will be all perspirey and covered with soot?” In horror.
“And you’ll be all sweaty and covered in soot?” In horror.
“I’ll be worse than that. I’ll be sweaty and covered with soot,” said Bob practically.
“I'll be even worse than that. I'll be sweaty and covered in dirt,” Bob said matter-of-factly.
Dolly groaned. “It seems to me as if everything is upside down.”
Dolly groaned. “It feels like everything is backwards.”
“No. Downside down. ‘Life is real; life is earnest,’” he quoted, laughing.
“No. Upside down. ‘Life is real; life is serious,’” he quoted, laughing.
“Oh, dear! That solemn sound! I can tell you are terribly determined.” He did not answer. “Well, good-by, great, big, perspirey—I mean sweaty, sooty old pal!”
“Oh, no! That serious tone! I can see you're really set on this.” He didn’t reply. “Well, goodbye, my big, sweaty, sooty old friend!”
“Good-by, Dolly. And thank you for calling me up. It did me good to hear little pal’s voice. Wish me luck.”
“Goodbye, Dolly. And thanks for calling me. It did my heart good to hear my little friend's voice. Wish me luck.”
“I’ll send you a horseshoe to-morrow,” she laughed. And then suddenly, as an afterthought— “By the way, I have a ’fession to make.”
“I’ll send you a horseshoe tomorrow,” she laughed. And then suddenly, as an afterthought— “By the way, I have a confession to make.”
“All right. ’Fess ahead.”
“Okay. Go ahead and confess.”
“Well, I don’t suppose I really and truly—deep down, you know—actually ever did quite think you were a regular burglar. I guess it was the dramatic situation that appealed to me. I’ve often thought I had ‘histrionic ability’ and you did make such a big, bold, handsome, darling make-believe burglar to play with, I just couldn’t resist.”
“Well, I don’t think I ever really believed—deep down, you know—that you were an actual burglar. I guess it was the dramatic situation that intrigued me. I’ve often thought I had a flair for the dramatic, and you were such a big, bold, good-looking pretend burglar to play with, I just couldn’t help myself.”
“I understand!” said Bob. “I guess—deep down—I guessed as much.” And rang off.
“I get it!” said Bob. “I suppose—deep down—I figured that out.” And hung up.
Bob went back to the fireplace. Was he dreaming now or only thinking? Dolly’s voice had taken him back to Mrs. Ralston’s, and the coals now framed a face. He looked quickly from them, his eyes following the smoke of his pipe. But the smoke now framed the face. Bob half-closed his eyes an instant, then resolutely he laid down his pipe and went to bed. Dad had closed the rather spacious old-fashioned house when he went away, and a momentary feeling of loneliness assailed Bob, as he realized there was no other person in the place, but he fought it down. Work was his incentive now—hard work—
Bob went back to the fireplace. Was he dreaming now or just thinking? Dolly’s voice had taken him back to Mrs. Ralston’s, and the coals now formed a face. He quickly looked away from them, his eyes following the smoke from his pipe. But the smoke now shaped the face. Bob half-closed his eyes for a moment, then firmly laid down his pipe and went to bed. Dad had closed up the pretty spacious old-fashioned house when he left, and a brief feeling of loneliness hit Bob as he realized there was no one else in the place, but he pushed it aside. Work was his motivation now—hard work—
The next day he learned they had lodged the promoter in jail. The big men had gone gunning for him, and, as usual, they got him. They got the “Utopian,” too. They took that because there wasn’t anything else to take. Incidentally, they discredited the broker’s statement that no one but a buzzard would go near it. Or, maybe, some of the big men were buzzards in disguise. Anyhow, they had the Utopian on their hands, and after they had settled with the promoter who had dared cross the trail of the big interests in his operations, they poked their fingers into Utopian and prodded it and examined it more carefully and discovered that with “honest judicial management” and a proper application of more funds that which had been but an odorous prospect might be converted into a “property.” The promoter had taken funds which he shouldn’t so he was out of their way, until he got pardoned.
The next day he found out they had locked the promoter up in jail. The big guys had gone after him, and, as usual, they got him. They also seized the “Utopian,” but that was just because there was nothing else to take. By the way, they disproved the broker's claim that only a vulture would go near it. Or maybe some of the big guys were just vultures in disguise. Anyway, they now had the Utopian in their possession, and after settling with the promoter who had dared to get in the way of the big interests with his dealings, they started poking around in the Utopian, prodding it, and looking at it more closely. They figured out that with “honest judicial management” and a proper application of more funds, what had been a stinky prospect could actually be turned into a “property.” The promoter had taken funds he shouldn't have, so he was out of their hair, at least until he got pardoned.
The Utopian accordingly now began to soar. There were plenty of people who would sniff at it in its new aspect, and take a bite, too. A shoal of speculators wanted to get aboard. That “honest management” was a bait; that “property” probability became a “sure thing.” Big names were juggled in little offices. The usual thing happened—just one of those common occurrences hardly worth describing—only later it would probably be included in a congressional investigation and there would be a few reverberations at Albany. Bob pulled out in about two days.
The Utopian started to take off. Many people would dismiss it in its new light and take a shot at it too. A group of speculators wanted to jump on board. That “honest management” was a tempting offer; that “property” chance became a “sure thing.” Big names were tossed around in small offices. The usual thing happened—just one of those typical events that hardly need mentioning—only later it would probably end up in a congressional investigation and there would be some buzz in Albany. Bob backed out in about two days.
“How’d you know?” said the broker.
“How did you know?” said the broker.
“Fellow feeling. Been called a thief and a crazy man, myself.”
“Empathy. I’ve been called a thief and a crazy person, too.”
“What you want to buy now? The next rankest thing I know of is—”
“What do you want to buy now? The next craziest thing I know of is—”
Bob shook his head. “Never again. Good-by forever.”
Bob shook his head. “Never again. Goodbye forever.”
“Good-by,” said the melancholy man. He thought he would see Bob down there again some day, but he never did. Bob went to a bank and opened an account. He wasn’t exactly rich but he had a nice comfortable feeling. Moreover he expected to build solidly. He leased the factory and then he went to work. Dad came home. He didn’t seem much interested in what Bob was doing. He loafed around and told fish stories. Bob got up about five a.m. but dad didn’t arise until nine. Sometimes he had his breakfast in bed and had his man bring him the newspaper. Bob didn’t have a man, though he soon began to prosper. The device was considered necessary in the trade; it proved practical.
"Goodbye," said the sad man. He thought he would see Bob down there again someday, but he never did. Bob went to a bank and opened an account. He wasn’t exactly wealthy, but he felt comfortably secure. Plus, he planned to build something solid. He leased the factory and then got to work. Dad came home. He didn’t seem very interested in what Bob was doing. He just hung around and told fishing stories. Bob got up around five a.m., but Dad didn’t get up until nine. Sometimes he had breakfast in bed and had a guy bring him the newspaper. Bob didn’t have a guy, but he soon started to do well. The device was seen as necessary in the business; it turned out to be practical.
Bob added to his factory and built a fair-sized chimney. Dreamily he wondered if it would realize jolly little chum’s idea of a chimney. He had to cut out all the social functions now for he was so tired when he got home he wanted only his dinner and his pipe and bed. Dad, however, stayed out late. He remarked once he thought he would learn to tango. Bob never knew though whether he carried out the idea or not.
Bob expanded his factory and built a decent-sized chimney. He wondered, absentmindedly, if it would match his cheerful little friend's vision of a chimney. He had to skip all the social events now because he was so exhausted when he got home that all he wanted was his dinner, his pipe, and bed. However, Dad stayed out late. He once mentioned that he was thinking about learning to tango. Bob never found out if he actually went through with it or not.
The newspapers, a few months later, apprised Bob that Gee-gee had landed the grand duke. A snapshot revealed him imbibing from Gee-gee’s Cinderella slipper. Possibly the grand duke was enraged over the snap-shot. More likely, however, he didn’t care; he was so high up he could do anything and snap his fingers at the world. Bob permitted himself a little recreation; out of mild curiosity, he went to see Gee-gee. She now had a fair-sized part and was talked about. Incidentally, she had acquired a few additional wriggles.
The newspapers, a few months later, informed Bob that Gee-gee had landed the grand duke. A photo showed him drinking from Gee-gee’s Cinderella slipper. The grand duke might have been angry about the picture. More likely, though, he didn’t care; he was so far up the ladder he could do whatever he wanted and ignore the world. Bob allowed himself a little break; out of mild curiosity, he went to see Gee-gee. She now had a decent role and was getting some attention. By the way, she had picked up a few more dance moves.
His Vivacious Highness sat in a box and Gee-gee wriggled mostly for him. She hardly looked at the audience, but the audience didn’t act offended. It applauded. Gee-gee’s dream had come true. She was a star. And to her credit she reached out a helping hand to Gid-up. The latter now said more than “Send for the doctor.” She had eight lines—which was certainly getting on some. Bob, however, didn’t notice Dan or Clarence in the audience. They were probably billing and cooing at home now. Only grand dukes can afford to toy with Gee-gees. Bob didn’t stay to see and hear it all for a little of Gee-gee went a long way, and besides, he had to get up early. Dad though, who accompanied Bob, said he would stay right through.
His lively Highness sat in a box while Gee-gee mostly wiggled for him. She barely glanced at the audience, but they didn’t seem offended. They applauded. Gee-gee's dream had come true. She was a star. To her credit, she reached out a helping hand to Gid-up. The latter now said more than just, “Send for the doctor.” She had eight lines—which was definitely some progress. Bob, however, didn’t notice Dan or Clarence in the audience. They were probably sweet-talking at home. Only grand dukes can afford to play around with Gee-gees. Bob didn’t stick around to see and hear it all because a little of Gee-gee went a long way, and besides, he had to get up early. Dad, however, who was with Bob, said he would stay for the whole thing.
Once on Fifth Avenue, Bob passed Miss Gerald; she was just getting out of her car. An awful temptation seized him to stop, but he managed to suppress it, for he had himself fairly in hand by this time. He saw they would almost meet, but there were many people and, in the press, he didn’t have to see her. So he didn’t. He felt sure she would cut him if he did. It was the first foolish thing he had done for some time; he realized that when he got away. But what was he to do? He objected to being cut, and by her, of all persons. He regretted the incident very much. It hurt his pride and, of course, he had earned her dislike.
Once on Fifth Avenue, Bob saw Miss Gerald; she was just getting out of her car. An overwhelming urge to stop and talk to her hit him, but he managed to push it down since he had himself under control by now. He noticed they were about to cross paths, but there were a lot of people around, and in the crowd, he didn’t have to face her. So he didn’t. He was sure she would ignore him if he did. It was the first silly mistake he had made in a while; he realized that once he got away. But what was he supposed to do? He didn’t want to be ignored, especially by her. He really regretted the whole thing. It bruised his pride, and of course, he knew he had given her a reason to dislike him.
Bob hied him factoryward and toiled mightily that day. It was work—work—though to what end? If he only knew! He had tried to tell himself that he was learning to forget, that he was becoming reconciled to the inevitable, but that quick glimpse he had caught of her from a distance, before he drifted by with the others, had set his pulses tingling. For a moment now Bob gave way to dreaming; the day was almost done. He sat with his head on his hand and his elbow on the desk. He had shown he was more than a dancing man. He would now have to fight an even harder battle. He would have to take her out of his heart and mind.
Bob hurried to the factory and worked hard that day. It was all work—work—though for what purpose? If only he knew! He had tried to convince himself that he was learning to forget and coming to terms with what was unavoidable, but that brief glimpse of her from a distance, just before he moved on with the others, had made his heart race. For a moment, Bob let himself drift into daydreams; the day was almost over. He sat with his head resting on his hand and his elbow on the desk. He had proven he was more than just a guy who dances. Now, he would have to fight an even tougher battle. He would have to push her out of his heart and mind.
But he couldn’t do that. It was impossible, when his whole nature clamored for her. He yielded now to the dubious luxury of thinking of her. He hoped he wouldn’t see her again and then gradually he would win in that fight against nature—or do his best to. Yes; he must do his best; he must, he repeated to himself, closing a firm hand resolutely. Then he started and stared—at a vision standing before him.
But he couldn’t do that. It was impossible, when his entire being longed for her. He gave in to the questionable comfort of thinking about her. He hoped he wouldn’t see her again and that over time he would succeed in that struggle against his feelings—or at least try his hardest. Yes; he had to do his best; he had to, he reminded himself, closing his fist firmly. Then he jolted and stared—at a figure standing in front of him.
“Why did you cut me to-day?”
“Why did you cut me today?”
CHAPTER XXIV—AT THE PORTALS
It was some time before Bob recovered sufficiently to answer. Fortunately they were alone in Bob’s private office. From below came the sound of hammers, but that and the dingy surroundings did not seem to disconcert her. She looked at Bob coldly, the violet eyes full of directness.
It took a while for Bob to recover enough to respond. Luckily, they were alone in Bob’s private office. From below, the sound of hammers could be heard, but that and the shabby surroundings didn’t seem to bother her. She looked at Bob coldly, her violet eyes full of intensity.
“I—well, I feared you would cut me,” stammered Bob. “Won’t—won’t you sit down?”
“I—I was worried you might reject me,” Bob stammered. “Could—could you please sit down?”
“No, thank you. At least, not yet. I,” accusingly, “am not accustomed to being cut, and if any of my friends cut me, I want to know why. That’s why I am here.”
“No, thank you. At least, not yet. I,” accusingly, “am not used to being ignored, and if any of my friends do that, I want to know why. That’s why I’m here.”
She was her father’s daughter at that moment—straight, forceful.
She was her father's daughter at that moment—direct, assertive.
“But,” said Bob eagerly, looking once more the way he used to, before he had got into this sobering business of manufacturer, “that’s just the point. You see I felt I had somehow forfeited my right to be one of your friends. I felt out of the pale.”
“But,” Bob said eagerly, glancing again the way he used to before he got into this serious business of being a manufacturer, “that’s exactly the point. You see, I felt like I had somehow lost my right to be one of your friends. I felt out of place.”
“Do you think you deserve to forfeit the right?”
“Do you think you deserve to give up that right?”
“I—perhaps. I don’t know. I’m very confused about all that happened at your aunt’s place.”
“I—maybe. I’m not sure. I’m really confused about everything that happened at your aunt’s place.”
Was that the shadow of a smile on the proud lips? Bob wasn’t looking at her. He dared not. He was talking to a drawing of his device.
Was that a hint of a smile on her proud lips? Bob wasn’t looking at her. He couldn’t bring himself to. He was focused on a sketch of his device.
“Perhaps you have heard of that confounded wager,” he went on. “I told you why I—I didn’t want to see you. At least, I think I did.”
“Maybe you’ve heard about that annoying bet,” he continued. “I told you why I—I didn’t want to meet you. At least, I think I did.”
“I have a vague impression of something of the kind,” said the girl.
“I have a blurry sense of something like that,” said the girl.
“And there you are,” observed Bob helplessly. “It was an awful muddle, all right. You certainly punished me some, though. Honestly, if I offended you, you did get back good and hard.”
“And there you are,” Bob remarked helplessly. “It was definitely a mess, for sure. You really made me pay for it, though. Honestly, if I upset you, you sure got your revenge.”
“Did I?” said she tentatively. “Is that a drawing of it on the wall?” She was looking at the device.
“Did I?” she asked, a bit unsure. “Is that a drawing of it on the wall?” She was staring at the device.
“Yes. That’s what I make.”
"Yes, that’s what I earn."
“Won’t you show me around?”
“Can you show me around?”
Bob did, walking as in a dream among the dingy workmen who paused as the vision passed. For a long time they talked—just plain ordinary talk. Then he told her how he was inventing something else and Miss Gerald listened while all differences seemed magically to have dropped between them. Drinking deep of the joy of the moment, Bob yielded to the unadulterated happiness that went with being near her. He forgot all about the long future when he would see her no more.
Bob walked like he was in a dream among the grimy workers who stopped as the vision went by. They talked for a long time—just simple, everyday conversation. Then he shared with her how he was working on something new, and Miss Gerald listened as if all the differences between them had vanished. Embracing the pure joy of the moment, Bob succumbed to the unfiltered happiness that came with being close to her. He forgot all about the long future when he wouldn’t see her again.
Finally Miss Gerald got up to go. They had returned to Bob’s office and she had seated herself in a shabby old chair.
Finally, Miss Gerald got up to leave. They had gone back to Bob's office, and she had settled into a worn-out old chair.
Bob’s face fell. His heart had been beating fast and the old light had come to his eyes.
Bob's expression changed. His heart was racing, and a familiar spark returned to his eyes.
“Going?” he said awkwardly.
"Going?" he asked awkwardly.
“Yes.”
“Yes.”
She put out her hand and Bob took it, looking into her eyes. Then—he never knew how it happened—he had her in his arms. Bang! bang! went Bob’s hammers below and they seemed to be competing with the beating of his heart. At length the girl stirred slightly. She was wonderful in her proud compliance to Bob’s somewhat chaotic and over-powering expression of his emotions. “I suffered, too, a little, perhaps,” she said.
She extended her hand and Bob grabbed it, gazing into her eyes. Then—he could never quite figure out how it happened—he had her in his arms. Bang! bang! went Bob’s hammers below, and they seemed to compete with the pounding of his heart. Eventually, the girl shifted slightly. She was amazing in her proud acceptance of Bob’s somewhat chaotic and overwhelming display of emotions. “I suffered a bit too, maybe,” she said.
That nearly completed Bob’s undoing. “You! you!” he said, holding her from him and regarding her face eagerly, devouringly.
That almost finished Bob off. “You! You!” he said, pulling her away and looking at her face with intense desire.
“Yes,” the proud lips curled a little, “I haven’t really a heart of stone, you know.”
“Yes,” the proud lips curled slightly, “I don’t actually have a heart of stone, you know.”
Then Bob became chaotic once more for it was as if heaven had been hurled at him. He spoke burning words of truth and this time they did not get him into trouble. She drank them all in, too. Then he began to ask questions in that same chaotic manner. He was so masterful she had to answer.
Then Bob became chaotic again, as if heaven had been thrown at him. He spoke powerful words of truth, and this time they didn’t get him into trouble. She absorbed every word. Then he started asking questions in that same wild way. He was so commanding that she had to respond.
“Yes, yes,” she said, “of course, I do.”
“Yes, yes,” she said, “of course I do.”
“When did it begin?”
“When did it start?”
“A long, long time ago.”
"Once upon a time."
“You have loved me a long time?” he exulted and drew a deep breath. “A moment ago I was pondering on the problems of life and wondering what was the use of it all? Now—” He paused.
“You have loved me for a long time?” he exclaimed, taking a deep breath. “Just a moment ago, I was thinking about the problems of life and questioning what the point of it all was. Now—” He paused.
“Now?” said the girl and her eyes were direct and clear. The love light in them—for it was that—shone as the light of stars.
“Now?” said the girl, and her eyes were direct and clear. The love in them—for that’s what it was—shone like the light of stars.
Bob threw out his arms. “Life is great,” he said.
Bob threw out his arms. “Life is amazing,” he said.
A moment they stood apart and looked at each other. “It can’t be,” said Bob. “It is too much to believe. I certainly must prove it once more.”
A moment they stood apart and looked at each other. “It can’t be,” said Bob. “It’s too much to believe. I definitely need to prove it one more time.”
“One moment,” said Miss Gerald. “Dolly told me you kissed her.”
“One moment,” said Miss Gerald. “Dolly told me you kissed her.”
“I did.”
“I did.”
“Why, if as you say, it was only I—?”
“Why, if you say it was just me—?”
Bob was silent.
Bob was quiet.
“Did—did she ask you to?”
"Did she ask you to?"
Bob did not answer.
Bob didn't reply.
“You don’t answer?” The violet eyes studied him discerningly.
“You’re not going to answer?” The violet eyes examined him closely.
“All I can say is I did kiss her.” He would not betray jolly little pal.
“All I can say is I kissed her.” He wouldn’t betray his cheerful little buddy.
The violet eyes looked satisfied. “You have answered,” she said. “I think I understand the situation thoroughly.”
The violet eyes looked pleased. “You’ve answered,” she said. “I think I get the situation completely.”
Bob impetuously wanted to demonstrate once more that she was really she—that it wasn’t a dream—but she held him back and looked into his eyes. “You’ve said a good many things,” said Miss Gerald. “But there’s one you haven’t.”
Bob eagerly wanted to prove once again that she was truly herself—that it wasn’t a dream—but she stopped him and looked into his eyes. “You’ve said a lot,” Miss Gerald said. “But there’s one thing you haven’t.”
“What?”
“Wait, what?”
“It’s one you really ought to ask, after all this demonstration.”
“It’s a question you definitely should ask after all this demonstration.”
“Oh!” said Bob loudly. “Will you marry me?”
“Oh!” Bob exclaimed loudly. “Will you marry me?”
“Yes,” she answered. And for the first time voluntarily offered him her lips.
“Yes,” she replied. And for the first time, she willingly offered him her lips.
Suddenly the sound of hammers stopped.
Suddenly, the sound of hammers ceased.
“What’s happening?” she asked.
“What's going on?” she asked.
“Closing time. May I see you to your car?”
“Closing time. Can I walk you to your car?”
“Yes,” she laughed, “if you will get in.”
“Yes,” she laughed, “if you’re willing to get in.”
“I’ll get in if you won’t be ashamed of having a rather dingy-looking individual by your side?”
“I’ll join you if you won’t mind having someone who looks a bit rough next to you?”
“I’m proud of you, Bob,” said her father’s daughter. “And I believe in you.”
“I’m proud of you, Bob,” said her father’s daughter. “And I believe in you.”
“And—?” he suggested.
"And—?" he asked.
“I love you,” she said simply.
“I love you,” she said plainly.
Bob tried to say something, but words didn’t seem to come. Then silently he opened the door and they passed out. He helped her in the car and held a small gloved hand all the way down Fifth Avenue. Young people who can be cruel are, also, capable of going to the other extreme. It wasn’t Fifth Avenue for Bob. It was Paradise.
Bob tried to say something, but the words wouldn’t come. Then, without saying a word, he opened the door and they stepped outside. He helped her into the car and held her small, gloved hand all the way down Fifth Avenue. Young people who can be cruel are also capable of showing kindness. For Bob, it wasn’t Fifth Avenue; it was Paradise.
Dad heard the news that night. “Of course,” he said. “I expected it.” Then, with a twinkle of the eye. “But I’m glad you got started in life for yourself first, son. I was afraid you would ask her before you had the right.”
Dad heard the news that night. “Of course,” he said. “I expected it.” Then, with a twinkle in his eye, he added, “But I’m glad you started building your life for yourself first, son. I was worried you would ask her before you were ready.”
“You afraid? Then you did suggest my doing it, just to try me, to see what kind of stuff I was made of? I thought so. I told her so.” Bob’s eyes now began to twinkle. “Sure that’s all you did, dad, to find out if I was a real man or a sawdust one?”
“You scared? So you wanted me to do it, just to test me, to see what I was really made of? I figured as much. I told her that.” Bob’s eyes started to sparkle. “Is that really all you did, dad, to find out if I was a real man or just fake?”
“Perhaps I did misrepresent slightly the state of the parental exchequer. As a matter of fact, I’m still pretty well off, Bob. Though they did bounce me a little, I was not so much ruined as I let people think. I didn’t deny those bankruptcy stories, because I wanted you to make good, dear boy. And you have!” There was pride and affection in dad’s tones. “But now that you have, there will be no further need to continue that Japanese custom. I have ample for my simple needs and a little left over to go fishing with.”
“Maybe I did exaggerate a bit about the state of the family finances. The truth is, I’m still doing pretty well, Bob. Even though they did put me through a tough time, I wasn’t as ruined as I let people believe. I didn’t deny those bankruptcy rumors because I wanted you to succeed, dear boy. And you have!” There was pride and affection in Dad’s voice. “But now that you have, there’s no need to keep that Japanese custom going. I have enough for my basic needs and a little extra for fishing.”
Bob might have protested, but just at that moment a car swung in front of the house, where it stopped. On the back seat sat a lady. The driver got out and started up the steps to dad’s house. By this time Bob was coming down the steps. He hastened to the lady.
Bob might have protested, but just then a car pulled up in front of the house and stopped. In the back seat sat a woman. The driver got out and walked up the steps to Dad’s house. By that time, Bob was coming down the steps. He hurried over to the woman.
“So good of you!” he said, his eyes alight. “I ordered to-day that car of my own,” he added, leaning over the door.
“That's so kind of you!” he said, his eyes sparkling. “I ordered my own car today,” he added, leaning over the door.
“Are you sure you can afford it yet?” she laughed.
“Are you sure you can afford it now?” she laughed.
“Sure. And it will be a beauty. As fit for you as any car could be!”
“Sure. And it’ll be amazing. Just perfect for you, like any car could be!”
“Are you going like that—hatless?” she asked.
“Are you going like that—without a hat?” she asked.
“I—well, I was wondering if I couldn’t induce you to come in for a moment?” Eagerly. “Want you to meet dad. Or shall I bring him out here?”
“I—well, I was wondering if I could get you to come in for a moment?” Eagerly. “I want you to meet my dad. Or should I bring him out here?”
“I’ll go in, of course,” she said, rising at once. “And I shall be very glad.”
“I'll go in, of course,” she said, getting up right away. “And I'll be really happy to do it.”
“He—he was only trying me out, after all,” spoke Bob as he opened the door of the car. “That advice, I mean. You remember? And he pretended to be broke, too, just to test me. He told me just now.”
“He—he was just testing me, after all,” Bob said as he opened the car door. “That advice, I mean. You remember? And he even acted like he was broke, just to see how I’d react. He just told me that.”
“I think I shall like your father,” said Miss Gerald.
"I think I'm going to like your dad," said Miss Gerald.
“Oh, we’re bully chums!”
"Oh, we’re good friends!"
By this time they were in the house. Bob took her by the hand and led her to dad.
By this time, they were inside the house. Bob took her hand and led her to Dad.
“I remember your mother and I knew your father,” said dad, when Bob had presented him. “Your mother was very beautiful.”
“I remember your mom and I knew your dad,” said Dad when Bob introduced him. “Your mom was really beautiful.”
Gwendoline thanked him, while Bob gazed upon her with adoring eyes.
Gwendoline thanked him, while Bob looked at her with loving eyes.
“Isn’t she wonderful, dad?” he said.
“Isn’t she amazing, Dad?” he said.
“Wonderful, indeed,” said dad fondly, a little sadly. Perhaps he was thinking of the time when his own bride had stood right there, in the home he had bought for her. Perhaps he saw her eyes with the light of love in them—eyes long since closed. “I trust you will not think me trite if I say, God bless you,” murmured dad.
“Wonderful, indeed,” Dad said affectionately, with a hint of sadness. Maybe he was reminiscing about the time when his own bride had stood right there, in the home he had bought for her. Perhaps he remembered her eyes shining with love—eyes that had long since closed. “I hope you won’t find it cliché if I say, God bless you,” Dad murmured.
“I won’t think you trite at all,” said Gwendoline Gerald, approaching nearer to dad. “I think it very nice.”
“I won’t think you’re cliché at all,” said Gwendoline Gerald, stepping closer to Dad. “I think it’s really nice.”
“And would you think me trite if I—?”
“And would you think I’m cliché if I—?”
Dad’s meaning was apparent for Gwendoline’s golden head bent toward him and dad’s lips just brushed the fair brow.
Dad’s meaning was clear as Gwendoline’s golden hair bent towards him, and Dad’s lips lightly brushed her fair forehead.
“I’m very glad. I think Bob will make a good husband. He will have to set himself a high mark though, to deserve you, my dear.”
“I’m really happy. I think Bob will be a great husband. He’s going to need to aim high to deserve you, my dear.”
“That’s just what I keep telling her myself,” observed Bob. He experienced anew a touch of that chaotic feeling but didn’t give way to it on account of dad’s being there.
“That’s exactly what I keep telling her,” Bob remarked. He felt a wave of that chaotic sensation again but didn’t let it take over because his dad was there.
“Don’t set the mark too high, or you may leave me far behind,” laughed Gwendoline Gerald. “By the way I’ve asked Dolly to be first bridesmaid and she has consented. Said she supposed that was the ‘next best thing,’ though I can’t imagine what she meant.”
“Don’t set the bar too high, or you might leave me way behind,” laughed Gwendoline Gerald. “By the way, I asked Dolly to be the first bridesmaid and she agreed. She said she thought that was the ‘next best thing,’ but I can’t imagine what she meant.”
“That’s jolly,” said Bob. He thrilled at these little delicious details of the approaching event. “But I suppose we should be going now.”
“That's great,” said Bob. He was excited about these little tasty details of the upcoming event. “But I guess we should head out now.”
“Is it the opera?” asked dad.
“Is it the opera?” Dad asked.
Bob answered that it was. “She insisted on coming for me in her car,” he laughed. “Would have had one myself now if I had imagined anything like this. It was rather sudden, you know.”
Bob replied that it was. “She insisted on picking me up in her car,” he laughed. “I would have had one myself by now if I had expected anything like this. It was kind of sudden, you know.”
“It looks as if I made him do it,” said the girl with a laugh. “I went right to his office, and that, after his refusing me once, when I proposed to him.”
“It seems like I made him do it,” said the girl with a laugh. “I went straight to his office, even after he turned me down the first time I asked him.”
“Did you do that, Bob?”
"Did you do that, Bob?"
“Well, I didn’t believe she meant it. Did you?” To Miss Gerald.
“Well, I didn’t think she actually meant it. Did you?” To Miss Gerald.
“That’s telling,” said Gwendoline, and looked so inviting in that wonderful opera costume, so white and tall and alluring, so many other things calculated to fire a young man’s soul, that Bob had difficulty not to resort to extreme masculine measures to make her tell.
“That’s interesting,” said Gwendoline, looking so inviting in that amazing opera costume—so white, tall, and alluring, along with so many other things that could ignite a young man's spirit—that Bob found it hard not to take drastic measures to get her to share more.
“Hope you have a pleasant evening,” observed dad politely as they went out together, a couple the neighbors might well find excuse to stare at.
“Hope you have a nice evening,” Dad said politely as they went out together, a couple that the neighbors might easily find an excuse to gawk at.
“Oh, I guess we’ll manage to pull through,” said Bob.
“Oh, I think we’ll be able to get through it,” said Bob.
Their first evening out all alone by themselves in great, big gay New York! It was nice and shadowy, too, in the big limousine where the dim light spiritualized the girl’s beauty.
Their first night out just the two of them in vibrant, bustling New York! It was nice and dim, too, in the spacious limousine where the soft light enhanced the girl’s beauty.
“Tell now,” he urged, “what I asked you in there?”
“Tell me now,” he urged, “what I asked you in there?”
“Did I mean it?” Her starry eyes met his. “Perhaps a little bit. But I’m glad you didn’t accept. I’m glad it came out the other way,” she laughed.
“Did I mean it?” Her starry eyes met his. “Maybe a little. But I’m really glad you didn’t say yes. I’m happy it turned out the way it did,” she laughed.
Bob forgot there was a possibility of some one peering in and seeing them. Those laughing lips were such a tremendous lure. Then they both sat very still. Wheels sang around them; there was magic in the air.
Bob forgot that someone might peek in and see them. Those laughing lips were such an irresistible temptation. Then they both sat very still. Wheels sang around them; there was magic in the air.
“Just think of it!” said Bob with sudden new elation.
“Just think about it!” Bob said, suddenly feeling a rush of excitement.
“What?”
“What’s up?”
“Why, there’ll be nights and nights like this,” he said, as if he had made an important new discovery.
“Wow, there’ll be nights like this for a long time,” he said, as if he had just figured out something really significant.
“And ‘then some’!” added the classical young goddess non-classically and gaily, as they turned into the Great White Way.
“And then some!” added the young goddess playfully and cheerfully as they turned onto the Great White Way.
THE END
The End
By FREDERIC S. ISHAM
By FREDERIC S. ISHAM
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