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FLATLAND
A Romance of Many Dimensions
A Romance of Multiple Dimensions
With Illustrations
by the Author, A SQUARE
With Illustrations
by the Author, A SQUARE
“Fie, fie, how franticly I square my talk!”
Ugh, ugh, how wildly I try to control my speech!
LONDON
SEELEY & Co., 46, 47 & 48, ESSEX STREET, STRAND
(Late of 54 Fleet Street)
1884
LONDON
SEELEY & Co., 46, 47 & 48, ESSEX STREET, STRAND
(Previously at 54 Fleet Street)
1884
LONDON:
R. Clay, Sons, and Taylor,
BREAD STREET HILL.
LONDON:
R. Clay, Sons & Taylor
Bread Street Hill.
To
The Inhabitants of Space in General
And H. C. in Particular
This Work is Dedicated
By a Humble Native of Flatland
In the Hope that
Even as he was Initiated into the Mysteries
Of Three Dimensions
Having been previously conversant
With Only Two
So the Citizens of that Celestial Region
May aspire yet higher and higher
To the Secrets of Four Five or even Six Dimensions
Thereby contributing
To the Enlargement of the Imagination
And the possible Development
Of that most rare and excellent Gift of Modesty
Among the Superior Races
Of Solid Humanity
To
The Inhabitants of Outer Space
And H. C. Specifically
This Work is Dedicated
By a Humble Native of Flatland
In the Hope that
Just as he was Introduced to the Mysteries
Of Three Dimensions
Having only previously known
Two
So the Citizens of that Celestial Region
May aim even higher
To uncover the Secrets of Four, five, or even six Dimensions
Thus contributing
To the Expansion of the Imagination
And the potential Growth
Of that rare and wonderful Quality of Humility
Among the Superior Races
Of Solid Humanity
CONTENTS
PART I
THIS WORLD
PART I
THIS WORLD
- Section
- 1Of the Nature of Flatland
- 2Of the Climate and Houses in Flatland
- 3Concerning the Inhabitants of Flatland
- 4Concerning the Women
- 5Of our Methods of Recognizing one another
- 6Of Recognition by Sight
- 7Concerning Irregular Figures
- 8Of the Ancient Practice of Painting
- 9Of the Universal Colour Bill
- 10Of the Suppression of the Chromatic Sedition
- 11Concerning our Priests
- 12Of the Doctrine of our Priests
PART II
OTHER WORLDS
PART II
OTHER WORLDS
- 13How I had a Vision of Lineland
- 14How in my Vision I endeavoured to explain the nature of Flatland, but could not
- 15Concerning a Stranger from Spaceland
- 16How the Stranger vainly endeavoured to reveal to me in words the mysteries of Spaceland
- 17How the Sphere, having in vain tried words, resorted to deeds
- 18How I came to Spaceland and what I saw there
- 19How, though the Sphere showed me other mysteries of Spaceland, I still desired more; and what came of it
- 20How the Sphere encouraged me in a Vision
- 21How I tried to teach the Theory of Three Dimensions to my Grandson, and with what success
- 22How I then tried to diffuse the Theory of Three Dimensions by other means, and of the result
PART I
THIS WORLD
“Be patient, for the world is broad and wide.”
Be patient, because the world is vast and expansive.
FLATLAND
Section One
THIS WORLD
§ 1.—Of the Nature of Flatland.
I call our world Flatland, not because we call it so, but to make its nature clearer to you, my happy readers, who are privileged to live in Space.
I refer to our world as Flatland, not because that’s what we call it, but to help you, my fortunate readers, who get to live in Space, understand its nature more clearly.
Imagine a vast sheet of paper on which straight Lines, Triangles, Squares, Pentagons, Hexagons, and other figures, instead of remaining fixed in their places, move freely about, on or in the surface, but without the power of rising above or sinking below it, very much like shadows—only hard and with luminous edges—and you will then have a pretty correct notion of my country and countrymen. Alas, a few years ago, I should have said “my universe”: but now my mind has been opened to higher views of things.
Imagine a huge sheet of paper where straight lines, triangles, squares, pentagons, hexagons, and other shapes don’t stay in one spot but move around freely on the surface, like shadows—only solid with glowing edges. That gives you a pretty accurate idea of my country and its people. Unfortunately, a few years ago, I would have called it “my universe”: but now I see things from a broader perspective.
In such a country, you will perceive at once that it is impossible that there should be anything of what you call a “solid” kind; but I dare say you will suppose that we could at least distinguish by sight the Triangles, Squares and other figures moving about as I have described them. On the contrary, we could see nothing of the kind, not at least so as to distinguish one figure from another. Nothing was visible, nor could be visible, to us, except straight Lines; and the necessity of this I will speedily demonstrate.
In a country like this, you'll quickly realize that there can't be anything you would call "solid." However, you might think we could at least recognize the Triangles, Squares, and other shapes moving around as I've described. In reality, we couldn't see anything like that—not enough to tell one shape from another. We couldn't see anything at all, except straight Lines; and I'll prove why that's the case shortly.
Place a penny on the middle of one of your tables in Space; and leaning over it, look down upon it. It will appear a circle.
Place a penny in the center of one of your tables in Space; then, lean over it and look down at it. It will look like a circle.
But now, drawing back to the edge of the table, gradually lower your eye (thus bringing yourself more and more into the condition of the inhabitants of Flatland), and you will find the penny becoming more and more oval to your view; and at last when you have placed your eye exactly on the edge of the table (so that you are, as it were, actually a Flatland citizen) the penny will then have ceased to appear oval at all, and will have become, so far as you can see, a straight line.
But now, stepping back from the edge of the table, slowly lower your gaze (this will help you get into the mindset of the inhabitants of Flatland), and you’ll notice that the penny starts to look more and more oval to you; and finally, when you position your eye right at the edge of the table (so that you’re essentially a Flatland citizen), the penny will no longer appear oval at all and will, as far as you can see, look like a straight line.
The same thing would happen if you were to treat in the same way a Triangle, or Square, or any other figure cut out of pasteboard. As soon as you look at it with your eye on the edge of the table, you will find that it ceases to appear to you a figure, and that it becomes in appearance a straight line. Take for example an equilateral Triangle—who represents with us a Tradesman of the respectable class. Fig. 1 represents the Tradesman as you would see him while you were bending over him from above; figs. 2 and 3 represent the Tradesman, as you would see him if your eye were close to the level, or all but on the level of the table; and if your eye were quite on the level of the table (and that is how we see him in Flatland) you would see nothing but a straight line.
The same thing would happen if you were to view a Triangle, Square, or any other shape cut out of cardboard in the same way. Once you look at it with your eye at the edge of the table, it stops appearing as a shape and looks like a straight line instead. For example, an equilateral Triangle— which represents a tradesman of a respectable class in our world. Fig. 1 shows the tradesman as you would see him from above; figs. 2 and 3 show him as you would see him if your eye is nearly level with the table; and if your eye were exactly level with the table (which is how we see him in Flatland), you would see nothing but a straight line.

When I was in Spaceland I heard that your sailors have very similar experiences while they traverse your seas and discern some distant island or coast lying on the horizon. The far-off land may have bays, forelands, angles in and out to any number and extent; yet at a distance you see none of these (unless indeed your sun shines bright upon them revealing the projections and retirements by means of light and shade), nothing but a grey unbroken line upon the water.
When I was in Spaceland, I heard that your sailors have very similar experiences while they sail across your seas and spot some distant island or coastline on the horizon. The faraway land might have bays, points, and various shapes; yet from a distance, you see none of these (unless your sun is shining brightly, revealing the contours through light and shadow), just a gray, unbroken line on the water.
Well, that is just what we see when one of our triangular or other acquaintances comes towards us in Flatland. As there is neither sun with us, nor any light of such a kind as to make shadows, we have none of the helps to the sight that you have in Spaceland. If our friend comes close to us we see his line becomes larger; if he leaves us it becomes smaller: but still he looks like a straight line; be he a Triangle, Square, Pentagon, Hexagon, Circle, what you will—a straight Line he looks and nothing else.
Well, that's exactly what happens when one of our triangular or other acquaintances approaches us in Flatland. Since there’s no sun here, or any kind of light that creates shadows, we don’t have the visual aids that you have in Spaceland. If our friend gets closer, his line appears larger; if he moves away, it looks smaller. But still, he looks like a straight line, regardless of whether he’s a Triangle, Square, Pentagon, Hexagon, Circle, or anything else—a straight Line is all he appears to be.
You may perhaps ask how under these disadvantageous circumstances we are able to distinguish our friends from one another: but the answer to this very natural question will be more fitly and easily given when I come to describe the inhabitants of Flatland. For the present let me defer this subject, and say a word or two about the climate and houses in our country.
You might be wondering how, in these challenging conditions, we manage to tell our friends apart. But I can explain that more clearly and conveniently when I describe the people of Flatland. For now, let me put this topic on hold and say a little about the climate and houses in our country.
§ 2.—Of the climate and houses in Flatland.
As with you, so also with us, there are four points of the compass North, South, East, and West.
As with you, we also have four directions: North, South, East, and West.
There being no sun nor other heavenly bodies, it is impossible for us to determine the North in the usual way; but we have a method of our own. By a Law of Nature with us, there is a constant attraction to the South; and, although in temperate climates this is very slight—so that even a Woman in reasonable health can journey several furlongs northward without much difficulty—yet the hampering effect of the southward attraction is quite sufficient to serve as a compass in most parts of our earth. Moreover the rain (which falls at stated intervals) coming always from the North, is an additional assistance; and in the towns we have the guidance of the houses, which of course have their side-walls running for the most part North and South, so that the roofs may keep off the rain from the North. In the country, where there are no houses, the trunks of the trees serve as some sort of guide. Altogether, we have not so much difficulty as might be expected in determining our bearings.
Without the sun or any other celestial bodies, it’s impossible for us to find North in the usual way, but we have our own method. According to a natural law, there's a constant pull toward the South; even though this pull is pretty weak in temperate climates—so much so that a woman in good health can travel several furlongs north without too much trouble—it’s still enough to act as a compass in most areas of our world. Additionally, the rain, which falls regularly, always comes from the North, providing extra help. In towns, the buildings guide us since their walls mostly run North and South, helping to keep the roofs clear of rain coming from the North. In rural areas, where there are no buildings, the tree trunks can act as a sort of guide. Overall, we don't have as much trouble figuring out our direction as you might think.
Yet in our more temperate regions, in which the southward attraction is hardly felt, walking sometimes in a perfectly desolate plain where there have been no houses nor trees to guide me, I have been occasionally compelled to remain stationary for hours together, waiting till the rain came before continuing my journey. On the weak and aged, and especially on delicate Females, the force of attraction tells much more heavily than on the robust of the Male Sex, so that it is a point of breeding, if you meet a Lady in the street, always to give her the North side of the way—by no means an easy thing to do always at short notice when you are in rude health and in a climate where it is difficult to tell your North from your South.
Yet in our milder regions, where the pull to the south is hardly noticed, I’ve sometimes found myself in a completely empty area with no houses or trees to guide me, and I've had to stand still for hours, waiting for the rain before I could continue my journey. The force of this pull affects the weak and elderly, especially delicate women, much more than it does strong men. So it's important, when you see a lady in the street, to always give her the north side of the path—something that isn’t easy to do on the spot, especially when you're in good health and in a place where it's hard to figure out which way is north and which is south.
Windows there are none in our houses: for the light comes to us alike in our homes and out of them, by day and by night, equally at all times and in all places, whence we know not. It was in old days, with our learned men, an interesting and oft-investigated question, What is the origin of light; and the solution of it has been repeatedly attempted, with no other result than to crowd our lunatic asylums with the would-be solvers. Hence, after fruitless attempts to suppress such investigations indirectly by making them liable to a heavy tax, the Legislature, in comparatively recent times, absolutely prohibited them. I, alas I alone in Flatland—know now only too well the true solution of this mysterious problem; but my knowledge cannot be made intelligible to a single one of my countrymen; and I am mocked at—I, the sole possessor of the truths of Space and of the theory of the introduction of Light from the world of Three Dimensions—as if I were the maddest of the mad! But a truce to these painful digressions: let me return to our houses.
There are no windows in our homes: the light comes to us equally inside and outside, day and night, at all times and from all places, the source of which we don’t know. In the past, it was an intriguing question for our scholars: What is the origin of light? Many have tried to solve it, but the only result has been to fill our mental health facilities with those who thought they had the answers. After failed attempts to suppress such inquiries by imposing heavy taxes, the government has, in more recent times, completely banned them. Unfortunately, I alone in Flatland—know all too well the true answer to this mysterious problem; but I can’t explain it to any of my fellow citizens, and they mock me—I, the only one who has grasped the truths of Space and the theory of how Light enters from the world of Three Dimensions—like I’m the craziest of the crazy! But enough of these painful digressions: let me get back to our homes.
The most common form for the construction of a house is five-sided or pentagonal, as in the annexed figure. The two Northern sides RO, OF, constitute the roof, and for the most part have no doors; on the East is a small door for the Women; on the West a much larger one for the Men; the South side or floor is usually doorless.
The most common shape for building a house is five-sided or pentagonal, as shown in the figure attached. The two northern sides RO and OF make up the roof and usually don't have any doors; on the east side, there's a small door for women; on the west side, there's a much larger door for men; and the south side or floor typically has no doors.

Square and triangular houses are not allowed, and for this reason. The angles of a Square (and still more those of an equilateral Triangle) being much more pointed than those of a Pentagon, and the lines of inanimate objects (such as houses) being dimmer than the lines of Men and Women, it follows that there is no little danger lest the points of a square or triangular house residence might do serious injury to an inconsiderate or perhaps absent-minded traveller suddenly running against them: and therefore, as early as the eleventh century of our era, triangular houses were universally forbidden by Law, the only exceptions being fortifications, powder-magazines, barracks, and other state buildings, which it is not desirable that the general public should approach without circumspection.
Square and triangular houses are not allowed, and here's why. The angles of a square (and even more so those of an equilateral triangle) are much sharper than those of a pentagon, and the edges of inanimate objects (like houses) are less noticeable than the outlines of people. This means there's a real danger that the points of a square or triangular house could seriously hurt an inattentive or unaware traveler unexpectedly bumping into them. Because of this, as early as the eleventh century, triangular houses were completely banned by law, with the only exceptions being fortifications, ammunition depots, barracks, and other government buildings, which the public should approach with caution.
At this period, square houses were still everywhere permitted, though discouraged by a special tax. But, about three centuries afterwards, the Law decided that in all towns containing a population above ten thousand, the angle of a Pentagon was the smallest house-angle that could be allowed consistently with the public safety. The good sense of the community has seconded the efforts of the Legislature; and now, even in the country, the pentagonal construction has superseded every other. It is only now and then in some very remote and backward agricultural district that an antiquarian may still discover a square house.
During this time, square houses were still allowed everywhere, although they faced a special tax that discouraged their use. However, about three centuries later, the law determined that in towns with a population over ten thousand, the angle of a pentagon was the smallest house angle that could be permitted for public safety. The common sense of the community supported the legislature's efforts, and now even in rural areas, pentagonal designs have replaced all others. It's only occasionally in some very distant and underdeveloped agricultural areas that an antiquarian might still find a square house.
§ 3.—Concerning the Inhabitants of Flatland.
The greatest length or breadth of a full-grown inhabitant of Flatland may be estimated at about eleven of your inches. Twelve inches may be regarded as a maximum.
The maximum length or width of a fully grown resident of Flatland is around eleven of your inches. Twelve inches can be seen as the upper limit.
Our Women are Straight Lines.
Our women are straight lines.
Our Soldiers and Lowest Classes of Workmen are Triangles with two equal sides, each about eleven inches long, and a base or third side so short (often not exceeding half an inch) that they form at their vertices a very sharp and formidable angle. Indeed when their bases are of the most degraded type (not more than the eighth part of an inch in size), they can hardly be distinguished from Straight Lines or Women; so extremely pointed are their vertices. With us, as with you, these Triangles are distinguished from others by being called Isosceles; and by this name I shall refer to them in the following pages.
Our soldiers and the lowest classes of workers are triangles with two equal sides, each about eleven inches long, and a base or third side that is so short (often less than half an inch) that they create a very sharp and intimidating angle at their vertices. In fact, when their bases are of the most degraded type (no larger than an eighth of an inch), they can hardly be distinguished from straight lines or women; their vertices are so extremely pointed. Like you, we refer to these triangles as isosceles, and that's what I'll call them in the following pages.
Our Middle Class consists of Equilateral or Equal-sided Triangles.
Our Middle Class consists of equilateral or equal-sided triangles.
Our Professional Men and Gentlemen are Squares (to which class I myself belong) and Five-sided figures or Pentagons.
Our professional men and gentlemen are squares (which I belong to) and five-sided figures or pentagons.
Next above these come the Nobility, of whom there are several degrees, beginning at Six-sided Figures, or Hexagons, and from thence rising in the number of their sides till they receive the honourable title of Polygonal, or many-sided. Finally when the number of the sides becomes so numerous, and the sides themselves so small, that the figure cannot be distinguished from a circle, he is included in the Circular or Priestly order; and this is the highest class of all.
Next above these come the Nobility, which has several levels, starting with Six-sided Figures, or Hexagons, and then increasing in the number of their sides until they earn the distinguished title of Polygonal, or many-sided. Finally, when the number of sides becomes so large, and the sides themselves so small, that the shape can no longer be distinguished from a circle, they are included in the Circular or Priestly order; and this is the highest class of all.
It is a Law of Nature with us that a male child shall have one more side than his father, so that each generation shall rise (as a rule) one step in the scale of development and nobility. Thus the son of a Square is a Pentagon; the son of a Pentagon, a Hexagon; and so on.
It’s a natural law for us that a male child will have one more side than his father, so each generation typically advances one step in development and greatness. So, the son of a Square is a Pentagon; the son of a Pentagon is a Hexagon; and so on.
But this rule applies not always to the Tradesmen, and still less often to the Soldiers, and to the Workmen; who indeed can hardly be said to deserve the name of human Figures, since they have not all their sides equal. With them therefore the Law of Nature does not hold; and the son of an Isosceles (i.e. a Triangle with two sides equal) remains Isosceles still. Nevertheless, all hope is not shut out, even from the Isosceles, that his posterity may ultimately rise above his degraded condition. For, after a long series of military successes, or diligent and skilful labours, it is generally found that the more intelligent among the Artisan and Soldier classes manifest a slight increase of their third side or base, and a shrinkage of the two other sides. Intermarriages (arranged by the Priests) between the sons and daughters of these more intellectual members of the lower classes generally result in an offspring approximating still more to the type of the Equal-sided Triangle.
But this rule doesn't always apply to tradespeople, and even less so to soldiers and laborers; they really can hardly be considered fully human since they don’t all have equal sides. So, the Law of Nature doesn't seem to apply to them; the son of an Isosceles (i.e., a triangle with two equal sides) remains Isosceles. Still, there's hope for the Isosceles that his descendants might eventually rise above their low status. After a long series of military victories or hardworking and skilled efforts, it's usually seen that the more intelligent people among the artisan and soldier classes show a slight increase in their third side or base, along with a decrease in the other two sides. Marriages arranged by priests between the sons and daughters of these more intellectual members of the lower classes typically produce offspring that come closer to resembling an Equilateral Triangle.
Rarely—in proportion to the vast number of Isosceles births—is a genuine and certifiable Equal-sided Triangle produced from Isosceles parents.[1] Such a birth requires, as its antecedents, not only a series of carefully arranged intermarriages, but also a long-continued exercise of frugality and self-control on the part of the would-be ancestors of the coming Equilateral, and a patient, systematic, and continuous development of the Isosceles intellect through many generations.
Rarely, compared to the huge number of Isosceles births, does a true and verifiable Equal-sided Triangle come from Isosceles parents.[1] Such a birth needs not only a series of well-planned intermarriages but also a long-term commitment to frugality and self-discipline from the prospective ancestors of the future Equilateral, along with a patient, systematic, and ongoing cultivation of the Isosceles intellect over many generations.
The birth of a True Equilateral Triangle from Isosceles parents is the subject of rejoicing in our country for many furlongs round. After a strict examination conducted by the Sanitary and Social Board, the infant, if certified as Regular, is with solemn ceremonial admitted into the class of Equilaterals. He is then immediately taken from his proud yet sorrowing parents and adopted by some childless Equilateral, who is bound by oath never to permit the child henceforth to enter his former home or so much as to look upon his relations again, for fear lest the freshly developed organism may, by force of unconscious imitation, fall back again into his hereditary level.
The birth of a True Equilateral Triangle from Isosceles parents is a celebration in our country for many miles around. After a thorough examination by the Sanitary and Social Board, if the infant is certified as Regular, a formal ceremony welcomes them into the class of Equilaterals. The child is then immediately taken from their proud yet grieving parents and adopted by a childless Equilateral, who vows never to allow the child to return to their former home or even see their relatives again, to prevent the newly developed organism from unintentionally reverting to its genetic background.
The occasional emergence of an Isosceles from the ranks of his serf-born ancestors, is welcomed not only by the poor serfs themselves, as a gleam of light and hope shed upon the monotonous squalor of their existence, but also by the Aristocracy at large; for all the higher classes are well aware that these rare phenomena, while they do little or nothing to vulgarise their own privileges, serve as a most useful barrier against revolution from below.
The rare rise of an Isosceles from the ranks of his serf-born ancestors is welcomed not just by the poor serfs themselves, as a spark of light and hope in the dull misery of their lives, but also by the Aristocracy as a whole; because all the higher classes know that these rare cases, while they don't diminish their own privileges, act as a helpful barrier against revolution from below.
Had the acute-angled rabble been all, without exception, absolutely destitute of hope and of ambition, they might have found leaders in some of their many seditious outbreaks, so able as to render their superior numbers and strength too much even for the wisdom of the Circles. But a wise ordinance of Nature has decreed that, in proportion as the working-classes increase in intelligence, knowledge, and all virtue, in that same proportion their acute angle (which makes them physically terrible) shall increase also and approximate to the harmless angle of the Equilateral Triangle. Thus, in the most brutal and formidable of the soldier class creatures almost on a level with women in their lack of intelligence—it is found that, as they wax in the mental ability necessary to employ their tremendous penetrating power to advantage, so do they wane in the power of penetration itself.
Had the sharp-edged crowd been completely devoid of hope and ambition, they might have found leaders during their many rebellious uprisings who were capable enough to make their greater numbers and strength overwhelming, even against the wisdom of the Circles. However, a wise rule of Nature has determined that, as the working class grows in intelligence, knowledge, and virtue, their sharpness (which makes them physically intimidating) shall also increase, moving closer to the harmlessness of the Equilateral Triangle. Thus, among the most brutal and fearsome of the soldier class—who are often nearly as lacking in intelligence as women—it is observed that as their mental abilities improve, allowing them to effectively utilize their significant penetrating power, their actual ability to penetrate diminishes.
How admirable is this Law of Compensation! And how perfect a proof of the natural fitness and, I may almost say, the divine origin of the aristocratic constitution of the States in Flatland! By a judicious use of this Law of Nature, the Polygons and Circles are almost always able to stifle sedition in its very cradle, taking advantage of the irrepressible and boundless hopefulness of the human mind. Art also comes to the aid of Law and Order. It is generally found possible—by a little artificial compression or expansion on the part of the State physicians—to make some of the more intelligent leaders of a rebellion perfectly Regular, and to admit them at once into the privileged classes; a much larger number, who are still below the standard, allured by the prospect of being ultimately ennobled, are induced to enter the State Hospitals, where they are kept in honourable confinement for life; one or two alone of the more obstinate, foolish, and hopelessly irregular are led to execution.
How admirable is this Law of Compensation! And what a perfect testament to the natural suitability and, I can almost say, the divine origin of the aristocratic structure of the States in Flatland! By wisely applying this Law of Nature, the Polygons and Circles are almost always able to quell rebellion right from the start, taking advantage of the unquenchable and limitless optimism of the human mind. Art also supports Law and Order. It’s usually possible—through some artificial adjustment by the State physicians—to make some of the more intelligent leaders of a rebellion perfectly Regular and immediately welcome them into the privileged classes; a much larger number, who still fall short of the standard, are tempted by the chance of being eventually ennobled to enter the State Hospitals, where they are kept in honorable confinement for life; only one or two of the more stubborn, foolish, and hopelessly irregular are led to execution.
Then the wretched rabble of the Isosceles, planless and leaderless, are either transfixed without resistance by the small body of their brethren whom the Chief Circle keeps in pay for emergencies of this kind; or else more often, by means of jealousies and suspicions skilfully fomented among them by the Circular party, they are stirred to mutual warfare, and perish by one another’s angles. No less than one hundred and twenty rebellions are recorded in our annals, besides minor outbreaks numbered at two hundred and thirty-five; and they have all ended thus.
Then the miserable crowd of the Isosceles, aimless and without a leader, are either immobilized without a fight by the small group of their peers that the Chief Circle hires for emergencies like this; or more often, through jealousies and suspicions cleverly stirred up among them by the Circular party, they are incited to fight each other and end up destroying one another. Our records show no fewer than one hundred and twenty rebellions, along with two hundred and thirty-five smaller uprisings; and all of them have ended the same way.
§ 4.—Concerning the Women.
If our highly pointed Triangles of the Soldier class are formidable, it may be readily inferred that far more formidable are our Women. For, if a Soldier is a wedge, a Woman is a needle; being, so to speak, all point, at least at the two extremities. Add to this the power of making herself practically invisible at will, and you will perceive that a Female, in Flatland, is a creature by no means to be trifled with.
If our sharply defined Triangles of the Soldier class are intimidating, it’s easy to conclude that our Women are even more so. After all, if a Soldier is a wedge, a Woman is a needle; she is, so to speak, all point, at least at both ends. Add to this the ability to make herself virtually invisible whenever she wants, and you'll see that a Female in Flatland is certainly not someone to underestimate.
But here, perhaps, some of my younger Readers may ask how a woman in Flatland can make herself invisible. This ought, I think, to be apparent without any explanation. However, a few words will make it clear to the most unreflecting.
But here, maybe some of my younger readers might wonder how a woman in Flatland can make herself invisible. I think this should be obvious without any explanation. Still, a few words will clarify it for even the least thoughtful.
Place a needle on a table. Then, with your eye on the level of the table, look at it side-ways, and you see the whole length of it; but look at it end-ways, and you see nothing but a point: it has become practically invisible. Just so is it with one of our Women. When her side is turned towards us, we see her as a straight line; when the end containing her eye or mouth—for with us these two organs are identical—is the part that meets our eye, then we see nothing but a highly lustrous point; but when the back is presented to our view, then—being only sub-lustrous, and, indeed, almost as dim as an inanimate object—her hinder extremity serves her as a kind of Invisible Cap.
Place a needle on a table. Then, keeping your eye level with the table, look at it from the side, and you can see its entire length; but if you look at it from the end, all you see is a point: it becomes nearly invisible. This is just like one of our women. When her side is facing us, we see her as a straight line; but when the end that has her eye or mouth—because for us, these two features are the same—faces us, we see only a very shiny point; however, when her back is toward us, it appears only somewhat shiny and almost as dull as an inanimate object—her back then acts like an Invisible Cap.
The dangers to which we are exposed from our Women must now be manifest to the meanest capacity in Spaceland. If even the angle of a respectable Triangle in the middle class is not without its dangers; if to run against a Working Man involves a gash; if collision with an Officer of the military class necessitates a serious wound; if a mere touch from the vertex of a Private Soldier brings with it danger of death;—what can it be to run against a Woman, except absolute and immediate destruction? And when a Woman is invisible, or visible only as a dim sub-lustrous point, how difficult must it be, even for the most cautious, always to avoid collision!
The dangers we face from women must now be obvious to even the simplest minds in Spaceland. If even the angle of a decent triangle in the middle class isn't without risks; if bumping into a working man results in a cut; if colliding with a military officer requires a serious injury; if just a touch from a private soldier can lead to the risk of death—what could it mean to run into a woman, other than guaranteed and instant destruction? And when a woman is invisible, or visible only as a faint, dim point, how hard must it be, even for the most careful, to always avoid a collision!
Many are the enactments made at different times in the different States of Flatland, in order to minimize this peril; and in the Southern and less temperate climates, where the force of gravitation is greater, and human beings more liable to casual and involuntary motions, the Laws concerning Women are naturally much more stringent. But a general view of the Code may be obtained from the following summary:—
Many laws have been created at different times in the various States of Flatland to reduce this danger; and in the Southern and less temperate climates, where the force of gravity is stronger, and people are more prone to accidental and involuntary movements, the laws regarding women are understandably much stricter. However, a general overview of the Code can be gathered from the following summary:—
1. Every house shall have one entrance in the Eastern side, for the use of Females only; by which all females shall enter “in a becoming and respectful manner”[2] and not by the Men’s or Western door.
1. Every house will have one entrance on the East side, specifically for females; all females must enter “in a proper and respectful manner”[2] and not through the men’s or Western door.
2. No Female shall walk in any public place without continually keeping up her Peace-cry, under penalty of death.
2. No woman shall walk in any public place without constantly keeping up her peace cry, under penalty of death.
3. Any Female, duly certified to be suffering from St. Vitus’s Dance, fits, chronic cold accompanied by violent sneezing, or any disease necessitating involuntary motions, shall be instantly destroyed.
3. Any woman, properly certified as suffering from St. Vitus's Dance, seizures, a chronic cold with severe sneezing, or any illness causing involuntary movements, shall be immediately eliminated.
In some of the States there is an additional Law forbidding Females, under penalty of death, from walking or standing in any public place without moving their backs constantly from right to left so as to indicate their presence to those behind them; others oblige a Woman, when travelling, to be followed by one of her sons, or servants, or by her husband; others confine Women altogether to their houses except during the religious festivals. But it has been found by the wisest of our Circles or Statesmen that the multiplication of restrictions on Females tends not only to the debilitation and diminution of the race, but also to the increase of domestic murders to such an extent that a State loses more than it gains by a too prohibitive Code.
In some states, there’s an extra law that penalizes women with death for walking or standing in any public place unless they constantly sway their backs from side to side to show their presence to those behind them. Other states require a woman traveling to be accompanied by one of her sons, a servant, or her husband. Some states restrict women to their homes entirely, except during religious festivals. However, the wisest among our leaders have realized that adding more restrictions on women not only weakens the population but also leads to a rise in domestic murders, so much so that a state ends up losing more than it gains from an overly strict code.
For whenever the temper of the Women is thus exasperated by confinement at home or hampering regulations abroad, they are apt to vent their spleen upon their husbands and children; and in the less temperate climates the whole male population of a village has been sometimes destroyed in one or two hours of simultaneous female outbreak. Hence the Three Laws, mentioned above, suffice for the better regulated States, and may be accepted as a rough exemplification of our Female Code.
For whenever women get frustrated by being stuck at home or by strict rules outside, they tend to take it out on their husbands and kids; and in hotter climates, an entire village's male population has sometimes been wiped out in just a couple of hours due to a coordinated female uprising. That's why the Three Laws mentioned earlier work well for more orderly societies and can be seen as a rough example of our Female Code.
After all, our principal safeguard is found, not in Legislature, but in the interests of the Women themselves. For, although they can inflict instantaneous death by a retrograde movement, yet unless they can at once disengage their stinging extremity from the struggling body of their victim, their own frail bodies are liable to be shattered.
After all, our main protection comes not from the government, but from the interests of the women themselves. Because, even though they can cause immediate harm with a backward motion, if they can't quickly pull their stinging body part away from their victim's struggling body, their own delicate bodies risk getting broken.
The power of Fashion is also on our side. I pointed out that in some less civilised States no female is suffered to stand in any public place without swaying her back from right to left. This practice has been universal among ladies of any pretensions to breeding in all well-governed States, as far back as the memory of Figures can reach. It is considered a disgrace to any State that legislation should have to enforce what ought to be, and is in every respectable female, a natural instinct. The rhythmical and, if I may so say, well-modulated undulation of the back in our ladies of Circular rank is envied and imitated by the wife of a common Equilateral, who can achieve nothing beyond a mere monotonous swing, like the ticking of a pendulum; and the regular tick of the Equilateral is no less admired and copied by the wife of the progressive and aspiring Isosceles, in the females of whose family no “back-motion” of any kind has become as yet a necessity of life. Hence, in every family of position and consideration, “back motion” is as prevalent as time itself; and the husbands and sons in these households enjoy immunity at least from invisible attacks.
The power of fashion is definitely on our side. I pointed out that in some less civilized states, no woman is allowed to stand in any public place without swaying her hips from side to side. This practice has been common among ladies with any sense of social status in all well-governed states for as long as anyone can remember. It is considered a disgrace for any state to need legislation to enforce what should come naturally, and is already instinctive for every respectable woman. The rhythmic and, if I may say, well-modulated sway of the hips in our ladies of Circular rank is envied and copied by the wives of common Equilaterals, who can only manage a simple, monotonous swing, like the ticking of a clock. The consistent tick of the Equilateral is similarly admired and imitated by the wives of progressive and aspiring Isosceles, among whom no "hip sway" has yet become a necessity of life. Thus, in every family of status and respect, "hip sway" is as common as time itself; and the husbands and sons in these households enjoy at least some immunity from unseen criticism.
Not that it must be for a moment supposed that our Women are destitute of affection. But unfortunately the passion of the moment predominates, in the Frail Sex, over every other consideration. This is, of course, a necessity arising from their unfortunate conformation. For as they have no pretensions to an angle, being inferior in this respect to the very lowest of the Isosceles, they are consequently wholly devoid of brain-power, and have neither reflection, judgment nor forethought, and hardly any memory. Hence, in their fits of fury, they remember no claims and recognise no distinctions. I have actually known a case where a Woman has exterminated her whole household, and half an hour afterwards, when her rage was over and the fragments swept away, has asked what has become of her husband and her children!
Not for a second should it be assumed that women lack affection. Unfortunately, the emotions of the moment often overpower all other considerations for them. This is, of course, a result of their unfortunate makeup. Since they have no hopes of being sharp, being inferior in this regard even to the simplest isosceles triangle, they completely lack reasoning ability, and have no reflection, judgment, or foresight, and very little memory. Thus, in their fits of anger, they forget all obligations and overlook any distinctions. I’ve actually seen a situation where a woman wiped out her entire household, and half an hour later, once her rage had subsided and the mess was cleared up, she asked where her husband and children had gone!
Obviously then a Woman is not to be irritated as long as she is in a position where she can turn round. When you have them in their apartments—which are constructed with a view to denying them that power—you can say and do what you like; for they are then wholly impotent for mischief, and will not remember a few minutes hence the incident for which they may be at this moment threatening you with death, nor the promises which you may have found it necessary to make in order to pacify their fury.
Obviously, a woman shouldn’t be provoked as long as she has the ability to respond. When you have them in their rooms—which are designed to take away that ability—you can say and do whatever you want; because at that point, they are completely powerless to cause trouble and won’t remember a few minutes later the situation that has them threatening you, nor the promises you might have had to make to calm them down.
On the whole we get on pretty smoothly in our domestic relations, except in the lower strata of the Military Classes. There the want of tact and discretion on the part of the husbands produces at times indescribable disasters. Relying too much on the offensive weapons of their acute angles instead of the defensive organs of good sense and seasonable simulations, these reckless creatures too often neglect the prescribed construction of the Women’s apartments, or irritate their wives by ill-advised expressions out of doors, which they refuse immediately to retract. Moreover a blunt and stolid regard for literal truth indisposes them to make those lavish promises by which the more judicious Circle can in a moment pacify his consort. The result is massacre; not however without its advantages, as it eliminates the more brutal and troublesome of the Isosceles; and by many of our Circles the destructiveness of the Thinner Sex is regarded as one among many providential arrangements for suppressing redundant population, and nipping Revolution in the bud.
Overall, we generally get along pretty well in our home life, except in the lower ranks of the Military Classes. There, the lack of tact and discretion from the husbands sometimes leads to unimaginable disasters. Relying too much on the sharp edges of their arguments instead of using common sense and timely pretenses, these reckless individuals often overlook the proper layout of the Women’s areas or annoy their wives with thoughtless comments in public, which they stubbornly refuse to take back. Additionally, their blunt and rigid adherence to literal truth makes them less likely to make those extravagant promises that the more sensible members can use to quickly smooth things over with their partners. The outcome is chaos; however, it comes with its benefits, as it helps remove the more aggressive and problematic members of the Isosceles group. Many among our circles see the destructiveness of the Thinner Sex as one of several providential strategies for controlling overpopulation and preventing potential revolutions.
Yet even in our best regulated and most approximately circular families I cannot say that the ideal of family life is so high as with you in Spaceland. There is peace, in so far as the absence of slaughter may be called by that name, but there is necessarily little harmony of tastes or pursuits; and the cautious wisdom of the Circles has ensured safety at the cost of domestic comfort. In every Circular or Polygonal household it has been a habit from time immemorial—and has now become a kind of instinct among the women of our higher classes—that the mothers and daughters should constantly keep their eyes and mouths towards their husband and his male friends; and for a lady in a family of distinction to turn her back upon her husband would be regarded as a kind of portent, involving loss of status. But, as I shall soon shew, this custom, though it has the advantage of safety, is not without its disadvantages.
Yet even in our best-organized and most circular families, I can't say that the ideal of family life is as high as it is in Spaceland. There is peace, in that there is no killing, but there is necessarily little harmony in tastes or interests; and the cautious wisdom of the Circles has ensured safety at the expense of home comfort. In every Circular or Polygonal household, it has been a tradition since ancient times—and has now become almost instinctual among the women of our upper classes—that mothers and daughters should always keep their eyes and mouths directed towards their husband and his male friends; for a woman in a prominent family to turn her back on her husband would be seen as a kind of bad omen, resulting in a loss of status. However, as I will soon show, this custom, while offering safety, is not without its drawbacks.
In the house of the Working Man or respectable Tradesman—where the wife is allowed to turn her back upon her husband, while pursuing her household avocations—there are at least intervals of quiet, when the wife is neither seen nor heard, except for the humming sound of the continuous Peace-cry; but in the homes of the upper classes there is too often no peace. There the voluble mouth and bright penetrating eye are ever directed towards the Master of the household; and light itself is not more persistent than the stream of feminine discourse. The tact and skill which suffice to avert a Woman’s sting are unequal to the task of stopping a Woman’s mouth; and as the wife has absolutely nothing to say, and absolutely no constraint of wit, sense, or conscience to prevent her from saying it, not a few cynics have been found to aver that they prefer the danger of the death-dealing but inaudible sting to the safe sonorousness of a Woman’s other end.
In the homes of working-class men or respectable tradespeople—where the wife can ignore her husband while taking care of household chores—there are at least moments of peace, when the wife is neither seen nor heard, except for the constant background noise of her daily routine; but in the homes of the upper class, there’s often no peace at all. There, the chatty voice and keen eyes are always focused on the head of the household; and light itself is less persistent than the flow of a woman's conversation. The finesse and skill needed to dodge a woman’s sharp remarks aren’t enough to silence her chatter; and since the wife has nothing important to say and no filters of wit, common sense, or decorum to hold her back, quite a few cynics have claimed they’d rather face the risk of a silent but dangerous sting than the safe noise of a woman’s chatter.
To my readers in Spaceland the condition of our Women may seem truly deplorable, and so indeed it is. A Male of the lowest type of the Isosceles may look forward to some improvement of his angle, and to the ultimate elevation of the whole of his degraded caste; but no Woman can entertain such hopes for her sex. “Once a Woman, always a Woman” is a Decree of Nature; and the very Laws of Evolution seem suspended in her disfavour. Yet at least we can admire the wise Prearrangement which has ordained that, as they have no hopes, so they shall have no memory to recall, and no forethought to anticipate, the miseries and humiliations which are at once a necessity of their existence and the basis of the constitution of Flatland.
To my readers in Spaceland, the situation of our women may seem truly sad, and it really is. A man of the lowest type of Isosceles can look forward to some improvement in his status and to the eventual uplift of his entire degraded class; but no woman can have such hopes for her gender. “Once a woman, always a woman” is a decree of nature; and the very laws of evolution seem to be on hold when it comes to her. Yet at least we can appreciate the wise arrangement that has ensured that, since they have no hopes, they also lack the memory to recall or the foresight to expect the sufferings and humiliations that are both a necessity of their existence and the foundation of the constitution of Flatland.
§ 5.—Of our methods of recognizing one another.
You, who are blessed with shade as well as light, you who are gifted with two eyes, endowed with a knowledge of perspective, and charmed with the enjoyment of various colours, you, who can actually see an angle, and contemplate the complete circumference of a Circle in the happy region of the Three Dimensions—how shall I make clear to you the extreme difficulty which we in Flatland experience in recognizing one another’s configurations?
You, who are fortunate enough to have both shade and light, you who have two eyes, given the ability to understand perspective, and enjoy a variety of colors, you, who can actually see an angle, and observe the entirety of a circle in the wonderful world of three dimensions—how can I explain to you the immense challenge we in Flatland face in recognizing each other's shapes?
Recall what I told you above. All beings in Flatland, animate or inanimate, no matter what their form, present to our view the same, or nearly the same, appearance, viz. that of a straight Line. How then can one be distinguished from another, where all appear the same?
Recall what I mentioned earlier. All beings in Flatland, whether they're alive or not, regardless of their shape, appear to us as the same, or almost the same, image, which is that of a straight Line. How can we then tell one apart from another when they all look the same?
The answer is threefold. The first means of recognition is the sense of hearing; which with us is far more highly developed than with you, and which enables us not only to distinguish by the voice our personal friends, but even to discriminate between different classes, at least so far as concerns the three lowest orders, the Equilateral, the Square, and the Pentagon—for of the Isosceles I take no account. But as we ascend in the social scale, the process of discriminating and being discriminated by hearing increases in difficulty, partly because voices are assimilated, partly because the faculty of voice-discrimination is a plebeian virtue not much developed among the Aristocracy. And wherever there is any danger of imposture we cannot trust to this method. Amongst our lowest orders, the vocal organs are developed to a degree more than correspondent with those of hearing, so that an Isosceles can easily feign the voice of a Polygon, and, with some training, that of a Circle himself. A second method is therefore more commonly resorted to.
The answer has three parts. The first way we recognize each other is through hearing, which is much more developed in us than in you. This ability lets us not only identify our friends by their voices but also distinguish between different social classes, at least among the three lowest groups: the Equilateral, the Square, and the Pentagon— I don't consider the Isosceles. However, as we move up the social ladder, distinguishing voices becomes harder, partly because voices start to sound similar, and partly because the ability to tell voices apart is a common trait that isn't very strong among the upper class. Plus, whenever there's a chance of deception, we can't rely on this method. Among our lower classes, vocal abilities are much more developed compared to their hearing, so an Isosceles can easily imitate the voice of a Polygon and, with some practice, even that of a Circle. Therefore, we usually use a second method more often.
Feeling is, among our Women and lower classes—about our upper classes I shall speak presently—the principal test of recognition, at all events between strangers, and when the question is, not as to the individual, but as to the class. What therefore “introduction” is among the higher classes in Spaceland, that the process of “feeling” is with us. “Permit me to ask you to feel and be felt by my friend Mr. So-and-so”—is still, among the more old-fashioned of our country gentlemen in districts remote from towns, the customary formula for a Flatland introduction. But in the towns, and among men of business, the words “be felt by” are omitted and the sentence is abbreviated to, “Let me ask you to feel Mr. So-and-so”; although it is assumed, of course, that the “feeling” is to be reciprocal. Among our still more modern and dashing young gentlemen—who are extremely averse to superfluous effort and supremely indifferent to the purity of their native language—the formula is still further curtailed by the use of “to feel” in a technical sense, meaning, “to recommend-for-the purposes-of-feeling-and-being-felt”; and at this moment the “slang” of polite or fast society in the upper classes sanctions such a barbarism as “Mr. Smith, permit me to feel you Mr. Jones.”
Feeling is, among our women and lower classes—I'll discuss the upper classes shortly—the main way we recognize each other, especially between strangers, and when we're talking about class rather than individuals. What “introduction” is in the upper classes of Spaceland, that process of “feeling” represents for us. “Let me introduce you to my friend Mr. So-and-so” is still the traditional formula for an introduction among the more old-fashioned country gentlemen in areas far from towns. However, in towns and among business people, the phrase “be felt by” is dropped, and it's shortened to, “Let me introduce you to Mr. So-and-so”; although it’s assumed that the “feeling” will be mutual. Among our even more modern and stylish young gentlemen—who really dislike unnecessary effort and don’t care much about the integrity of their language—the phrase is further simplified to use “to feel” in a technical sense, meaning “to recommend for the purpose of feeling and being felt”; and at this moment, the “slang” of polite or trendy society in the upper classes allows for such a crude expression as “Mr. Smith, let me feel you Mr. Jones.”
Let not my Reader however suppose that “feeling” is with us the tedious process that it would be with you, or that we find it necessary to feel right round all the sides of every individual before we determine the class to which he belongs. Long practice and training, begun in the schools and continued in the experience of daily life, enable us to discriminate at once by the sense of touch, between the angles of an equal-sided Triangle, Square, and Pentagon; and I need not say that the brainless vertex of an acute-angled Isosceles is obvious to the dullest touch. It is therefore not necessary, as a rule, to do more than feel a single angle of any individual; and this, once ascertained, tells us the class of the person whom we are addressing, unless indeed he belongs to the higher sections of the nobility. There the difficulty is much greater. Even a Master of Arts in our University of Wentbridge has been known to confuse a ten-sided with a twelve-sided Polygon; and there is hardly a Doctor of Science in or out of that famous University who could pretend to decide promptly and unhesitatingly between a twenty-sided and a twenty-four sided member of the Aristocracy.
Let my reader not think that "feeling" for us is the long, tedious process it might be for you, or that we need to assess every aspect of an individual before determining their class. Through extensive practice and training, starting in school and continuing through everyday experiences, we can instantly tell the difference by touch between an equilateral Triangle, Square, and Pentagon; and I shouldn't have to point out that the sharp vertex of an acute-angled Isosceles triangle is clear even to the least sensitive touch. So, as a rule, we usually only need to feel one angle of any individual; once we identify that, it reveals the class of the person we're dealing with, unless, of course, they belong to the higher echelons of nobility. In those cases, it's much more challenging. Even a Master of Arts from our University of Wentbridge has been known to mistake a ten-sided Polygon for a twelve-sided one; and there’s hardly a Doctor of Science, in or out of that renowned University, who could claim to quickly and confidently distinguish between a twenty-sided and a twenty-four-sided member of the Aristocracy.
Those of my readers who recall the extracts I gave above from the Legislative code concerning Women, will readily perceive that the process of introduction by contact requires some care and discretion. Otherwise the angles might inflict on the unwary Feeler irreparable injury. It is essential for the safety of the Feeler that the Felt should stand perfectly still. A start, a fidgety shifting of the position, yes, even a violent sneeze, has been known before now to prove fatal to the incautious, and to nip in the bud many a promising friendship. Especially is this true among the lower classes of the Triangles. With them, the eye is situated so far from their vertex that they can scarcely take cognizance of what goes on at that extremity of their frame. They are moreover of a rough coarse nature, not sensitive to the delicate touch of the highly organized Polygon. What wonder then if an involuntary toss of the head has ere now deprived the State of a valuable life!
Those readers who remember the excerpts I shared earlier from the Legislative code about Women will quickly see that the process of introduction through contact requires careful attention and discretion. If not, the angles could cause serious harm to the unsuspecting Feeler. For the safety of the Feeler, it’s crucial that the Felt remains completely still. A sudden move, a fidget, or even a strong sneeze has been known to be lethal to the careless, and has prematurely ended many potential friendships. This is especially true among the lower classes of Triangles. With them, the eye is placed so far from their vertex that they can hardly notice what happens at that end of their body. Additionally, they tend to be rough and coarse, not attuned to the sensitive touch of the finely tuned Polygon. It's no surprise, then, if an accidental jerk of the head has cost the State a valuable life!
I have heard that my excellent Grandfather—one of the least irregular of his unhappy Isosceles class, who indeed obtained, shortly before his decease, four out of seven votes from the Sanitary and Social Board for passing him into the class of the Equal-sided—often deplored with a tear in his venerable eye, a miscarriage of this kind, which had occurred to his great-great-great-Grandfather, a respectable Working Man with an angle or brain of 59° 30′. According to his account, my unfortunate Ancestor, being afflicted with rheumatism, and in the act of being felt by a Polygon, by one sudden start accidentally transfixed the Great Man through the diagonal; and thereby, partly in consequence of his long imprisonment and degradation, and partly because of the moral shock which pervaded the whole of my Ancestor’s relations, threw back our family a degree and a half in their ascent towards better things. The result was that in the next generation the family brain was registered at only 58°, and not till the lapse of five generations was the lost ground recovered, the full 60° attained, and the Ascent from the Isosceles finally achieved. And all this series of calamities from one little accident in the process of Feeling.
I’ve heard that my great Grandfather—one of the least irregular members of his unfortunate Isosceles class, who actually got four out of seven votes from the Sanitary and Social Board to move him into the Equal-sided class shortly before he passed away—often lamented, with a tear in his wise old eye, an incident like this that happened to his great-great-great-Grandfather, a respectable Working Man with an angle or brain of 59° 30′. According to him, my unfortunate Ancestor, suffering from rheumatism and being examined by a Polygon, accidentally skewered the Great Man through the diagonal with a sudden movement; and because of his long imprisonment and humiliation, and partly due to the moral shock that affected all my Ancestor’s relatives, our family was set back a degree and a half in our progress toward better things. This resulted in the next generation’s family brain being recorded at only 58°, and it took five generations to recover the lost ground, reach the full 60°, and finally escape the Isosceles. All of this trouble stemmed from one little accident during the process of Feeling.
At this point I think I hear some of my better educated readers exclaim, “How could you in Flatland know anything about angles and degrees, or minutes? We can see an angle, because we in the region of Space, can see two straight lines inclined to one another; but you, who can see nothing but one straight line at a time, or at all events only a number of bits of straight lines all in one straight line,—how can you ever discern any angle, and much less register angles of different sizes?”
At this point, I can imagine some of my more educated readers saying, “How could you in Flatland know anything about angles and degrees or minutes? We can see an angle because we live in Space, where we can observe two straight lines leaning towards each other. But you, who can only see one straight line at a time, or at most just a series of straight lines all in one straight line—how can you ever recognize any angle, let alone measure angles of different sizes?”
I answer that though we cannot see angles, we can infer them, and this with great precision. Our sense of touch, stimulated by necessity, and developed by long training, enables us to distinguish angles far more accurately than your sense of sight, when unaided by a rule or measure of angles. Nor must I omit to explain that we have great natural helps. It is with us a Law of Nature that the brain of the Isosceles class shall begin at half a degree, or thirty minutes, and shall increase (if it increases at all) by half a degree in every generation; until the goal of 60° is reached, when the condition of serfdom is quitted, and the freeman enters the class of Regulars.
I reply that even though we can't see angles, we can infer them with great accuracy. Our sense of touch, driven by necessity and honed through extensive training, allows us to identify angles much more precisely than your sense of sight does when it's not supported by a ruler or angle measurement. I should also mention that we have significant natural advantages. It’s a Law of Nature for the Isosceles class that the brain starts at half a degree or thirty minutes and increases (if it increases at all) by half a degree in each generation, until it reaches a goal of 60° at which point the state of servitude is left behind and the individual becomes part of the Regulars.
Consequently, Nature herself supplies us with an ascending scale or Alphabet of angles for half a degree up to 60°, Specimens of which are placed in every Elementary School throughout the land. Owing to occasional retrogressions, to still more frequent moral and intellectual stagnation, and to the extraordinary fecundity of the Criminal and Vagabond Classes, there is always a vast superfluity of individuals of the half degree and single degree class, and a fair abundance of Specimens up to 10°. These are absolutely destitute of civic rights; and a great number of them, not having even intelligence enough for the purposes of warfare, are devoted by the States to the service of education. Fettered immovably so as to remove all possibility of danger, they are placed in the class rooms of our Infant Schools, and there they are utilized by the Board of Education for the purpose of imparting to the offspring of the Middle Classes that tact and intelligence of which these wretched creatures themselves are utterly devoid.
Consequently, Nature herself provides us with a rising scale or alphabet of angles from half a degree to 60°, examples of which can be found in every elementary school across the country. Due to occasional setbacks, more frequent moral and intellectual stagnation, and the overwhelming number of criminals and vagabonds, there is always a large surplus of individuals in the half-degree and single-degree categories, along with a decent number of examples up to 10°. These individuals have no civil rights at all; many of them, lacking even the intelligence for warfare, are assigned by the states to educational services. Completely restrained to eliminate any risk, they are placed in the classrooms of our infant schools, where the Board of Education uses them to teach the middle-class children the skills and intelligence that these unfortunate individuals completely lack.
In some states the Specimens are occasionally fed and suffered to exist for several years; but in the more temperate and better regulated regions, it is found in the long run more advantageous for the educational interests of the young, to dispense with food, and to renew the Specimens every month,—which is about the average duration of the foodless existence of the Criminal class. In the cheaper schools, what is gained by the longer existence of the Specimens is lost, partly in the expenditure for food, and partly in the diminished accuracy of the angles, which are impaired after a few weeks of constant “feeling.” Nor must we forget to add, in enumerating the advantages of the more expensive system, that it tends, though slightly yet perceptibly, to the diminution of the redundant Isosceles population—an object which every statesman in Flatland constantly keeps in view. On the whole therefore—although I am not ignorant that, in many popularly elected School Boards, there is a reaction in favour of “the cheap system,” as it is called—I am myself disposed to think that this is one of the many cases in which expense is the truest economy.
In some states, the Specimens are occasionally fed and allowed to live for several years; however, in more temperate and well-regulated areas, it turns out to be more beneficial for the educational needs of the young to skip feeding and to replace the Specimens every month — which is roughly how long the Criminal class can survive without food. In cheaper schools, the benefits of longer-lived Specimens are offset by the costs of food and the decreased accuracy of the angles, which deteriorate after a few weeks of constant "feeling." We should also consider that one of the advantages of the more expensive system is that it slightly helps reduce the excess Isosceles population — a goal that every statesman in Flatland keeps in mind. Overall, even though I recognize that many popularly elected School Boards are leaning towards the so-called "cheap system," I personally believe that this is one of those instances where spending more is actually the best way to save.
But I must not allow questions of School Board politics to divert me from my subject. Enough has been said, I trust, to show that Recognition by Feeling is not so tedious or indecisive a process as might have been supposed; and it is obviously more trustworthy than Recognition by hearing. Still there remain, as has been pointed out above, the objection that this method is not without danger. For this reason many in the Middle and Lower classes, and all without exception in the Polygonal and Circular orders, prefer a third method, the description of which shall be reserved for the next section.
But I shouldn't let issues with School Board politics distract me from my topic. I hope I've made it clear that Recognizing by Feeling isn't as boring or uncertain as one might think; and it's definitely more reliable than Recognizing by sound. However, as mentioned earlier, there is a valid concern that this method isn't without risks. Because of this, many people in the Middle and Lower classes, and everyone in the Polygonal and Circular groups, favor a third method, which I'll describe in the next section.
§ 6.—Of Recognition by Sight.
I am about to appear very inconsistent. In previous sections I have said that all figures in Flatland present the appearance of a straight line; and it was added or implied, that it is consequently impossible to distinguish by the visual organ between individuals of different classes: yet now I am about to explain to my Spaceland Critics how we are able to recognize one another by the sense of sight.
I know this might seem really inconsistent. In earlier sections, I mentioned that all shapes in Flatland look like straight lines; and it was suggested that this makes it impossible to tell apart individuals from different classes just by looking at them. However, now I'm going to explain to my Spaceland Critics how we can actually recognize each other using our sense of sight.
If however the Reader will take the trouble to refer to the passage in which Recognition by Feeling is stated to be universal, he will find this qualification—“among the lower classes.” It is only among the higher classes and in our more temperate climates that Sight Recognition is practised.
If the reader takes the time to look up the part where Recognition by Feeling is said to be universal, they will find this qualification—“among the lower classes.” Sight Recognition is only practiced among the higher classes and in our more temperate climates.
That this power exists in any regions and for any classes, is the result of Fog; which prevails during the greater part of the year in all parts save the torrid zones. That which is with you in Spaceland an unmixed evil, blotting out the landscape, depressing the spirits, and enfeebling the health, is by us recognized as a blessing scarcely inferior to air itself, and as the Nurse of arts and Parent of sciences. But let me explain my meaning, without further eulogies on this beneficent Element.
That this power exists in any areas and for any groups is due to Fog, which dominates for most of the year in all regions except the tropical zones. What is considered an outright negative in Spaceland, obscuring the view, dampening spirits, and weakening health, is seen by us as a blessing almost as valuable as air itself, and as the nurturer of art and the parent of science. But let me clarify my point without more praise for this beneficial Element.
If Fog were non-existent, all lines would appear equally and indistinguishably clear; and this is actually the case in those unhappy countries in which the atmosphere is perfectly dry and transparent. But wherever there is a rich supply of Fog, objects that are at a distance, say of three feet, are appreciably dimmer than those at a distance of two feet eleven inches; and the result is that by careful and constant experimental observation of comparative dimness and clearness, we are enabled to infer with great exactness the configuration of the object observed.
If fog didn't exist, all lines would look equally clear and indistinguishable; and this really is the case in those unfortunate countries where the atmosphere is completely dry and clear. However, wherever there’s a lot of fog, objects that are three feet away appear noticeably dimmer than those that are two feet eleven inches away; and as a result, through careful and ongoing experimental observation of how dim or clear things look, we can infer with great accuracy the shape of the object being observed.
An instance will do more than a volume of generalities to make my meaning clear.
An example will communicate my point much better than a lot of vague statements.
Suppose I see two individuals approaching whose rank I wish to ascertain. They are, we will suppose, a Merchant and a Physician, or in other words, an Equilateral Triangle and a Pentagon: how am I to distinguish them?
Suppose I see two people approaching whose status I want to figure out. They are, let’s say, a Merchant and a Physician, or in other words, an Equilateral Triangle and a Pentagon: how am I supposed to tell them apart?
It will be obvious, to every child in Spaceland who has touched the threshold of Geometrical Studies, that, if I can bring my eye so that its glance may bisect an angle (A) of the approaching stranger, my view will lie as it were evenly between his two sides that are next to me (viz. CA and AB), so that I shall contemplate the two impartially, and both will appear of the same size.
It will be clear to every child in Spaceland who has started learning about Geometry that if I can position my eye to bisect an angle (A) created by the approaching stranger, my perspective will be evenly balanced between his two sides next to me (specifically, CA and AB), allowing me to view both equally, making them look the same size.

Now in the case of (1) the Merchant, what shall I see? I shall see a straight line DAE, in which the middle point (A) will be very bright because it is nearest to me; but on either side the line will shade away rapidly into dimness, because the sides AC and AD recede rapidly into the fog; and what appear to me as the Merchant’s extremities, viz. D and C, will be very dim indeed.
Now, regarding (1) the Merchant, what will I see? I will see a straight line DAE (Does Anyone Else), where the midpoint (A) is very bright because it's closest to me; however, on either side, the line quickly fades into dimness, as the sides AC and AD rapidly disappear into the fog; and what I perceive as the Merchant’s ends, namely D and C, will be quite dim indeed.
On the other hand in the case of (2) the Physician, though I shall here also see a line (D′A′E′) with a bright centre (A′), yet it will shade away less rapidly into dimness, because the sides (A′C′, A′B′) recede less rapidly into the fog; and what appear to me the Physician’s extremities, viz. D′ and E′, will be not so dim as the extremities of the Merchant.
On the other hand, in the case of (2) the Physician, even though I will also see a line (D'A'E') with a bright center (A′), it will fade less quickly into darkness because the sides (A′C′, A′B′) recede less quickly into the fog; and what I see as the Physician’s edges, namely D′ and E', will be not as dim as the edges of the Merchant.
The Reader will probably understand from these two instances how—after a very long training supplemented by constant experience—it is possible for the well-educated classes among us to discriminate with fair accuracy between the middle and lowest orders, by the sense of sight. If my Spaceland Patrons have grasped this general conception, so far as to conceive the possibility of it and not to reject my account as altogether incredible—I shall have attained all I can reasonably expect. Were I to attempt further details I should only perplex. Yet for the sake of the young and inexperienced, who may perchance infer—from the two simple instances I have given above, of the manner in which I should recognize my Father and my Sons—that Recognition by sight is an easy affair, it may be needful to point out that in actual life most of the problems of Sight Recognition are far more subtle and complex.
The reader will likely understand from these two examples how—after a long training combined with constant experience—it’s possible for educated people among us to accurately distinguish between the middle and lower classes just by sight. If my Spaceland audience has understood this concept well enough to accept the possibility and not dismiss my account as completely unbelievable, I’ll have achieved all I can reasonably expect. If I were to provide more details, I would only confuse things. However, for the sake of the young and inexperienced, who might mistakenly think—from the two simple examples I provided about how I would recognize my Father and my Sons—that recognizing someone by sight is an easy task, it’s important to point out that, in real life, most of the challenges of sight recognition are much more subtle and complex.

If for example, when my Father, the Triangle, approaches me, he happens to present his side to me instead of his angle, then, until I have asked him to rotate, or until I have edged my eye round him, I am for the moment doubtful whether he may not be a Straight Line, or, in other words, a Woman. Again, when I am in the company of one of my two hexagonal Grandsons, contemplating one of his sides (AB) full front, it will be evident from the accompanying diagram that I shall see one whole line (AB) in comparative brightness (shading off hardly at all at the ends) and two smaller lines (CA and BD) dim throughout and shading away into greater dimness toward the extremities C and D.
If, for example, when my dad, the Triangle, approaches me and presents his side instead of his angle, then, until I ask him to turn or until I shift my view around him, I might temporarily doubt whether he could be a Straight Line, or in other words, a Woman. Again, when I'm with one of my two hexagonal grandsons, looking directly at one of his sides (AB), it will be clear from the accompanying diagram that I’ll see one whole line (AB) brighter (hardly fading at the ends) and two smaller lines (CA and BD) less bright throughout, fading into greater darkness toward the ends C and D.
But I must not give way to the temptation of enlarging on these topics. The meanest mathematician in Spaceland will readily believe me when I assert that the problems of life, which present themselves to the well-educated—when they are themselves in motion, rotating, advancing or retreating, and at the same time attempting to discriminate by the sense of sight between a number of Polygons of high rank moving in different directions, as for example in a ball-room or conversazione—must be of a nature to task the angularity of the most intellectual, and amply justify the rich endowments of the Learned Professors of Geometry, both Static and Kinetic, in the illustrious University of Wentbridge, where the Science and Art of Sight Recognition are regularly taught to large classes of the élite of the States.
But I shouldn't give in to the temptation to expand on these topics. Even the least skilled mathematician in Spaceland would easily believe me when I say that the challenges of life, which arise for the well-educated—especially when they are in motion, spinning, moving forward or backward, and at the same time trying to visually distinguish between various high-ranking Polygons moving in different directions, like in a ballroom or conversation—must be complex enough to challenge even the smartest minds. This clearly justifies the impressive skills of the Learned Professors of Geometry, both Static and Kinetic, at the renowned University of Wentbridge, where the Science and Art of Sight Recognition are regularly taught to large classes of the elite of the States.
It is only a few of the scions of our noblest and wealthiest houses, who are able to give the time and money necessary for the thorough prosecution of this noble and valuable Art. Even to me, a Mathematician of no mean standing, and the Grandfather of two most hopeful and perfectly regular Hexagons, to find myself in the midst of a crowd of rotating Polygons of the higher classes, is occasionally very perplexing. And of course to a common Tradesman, or Serf, such a sight is almost as unintelligible as it would be to you, my Reader, were you suddenly transported into our country.
It’s only a few of the heirs from our richest and most distinguished families who can afford the time and money needed to fully pursue this noble and valuable art. Even for me, a respected mathematician and the grandfather of two promising and perfectly regular hexagons, being surrounded by a group of high-class rotating polygons can be quite confusing at times. Naturally, for a regular tradesman or serf, witnessing such a scene would be as baffling as it would be for you, my reader, if you were suddenly dropped into our country.
In such a crowd you could see on all sides of you nothing but a Line, apparently straight, but of which the parts would vary irregularly and perpetually in brightness or dimness. Even if you had completed your third year in the Pentagonal and Hexagonal classes in the University, and were perfect in the theory of the subject, you would still find that there was need of many years of experience, before you could move in a fashionable crowd without jostling against your betters, whom it is against etiquette to ask to “feel,” and who, by their superior culture and breeding, know all about your movements, while you know very little or nothing about theirs. In a word, to comport oneself with perfect propriety in Polygonal society, one ought to be a Polygon oneself. Such at least is the painful teaching of my experience.
In such a crowd, you could see nothing around you but a Line, seemingly straight, but the parts would constantly and irregularly vary in brightness or dimness. Even if you had finished your third year in the Pentagonal and Hexagonal classes at the University and were an expert in the theory, you would still need many years of experience before you could navigate a fashionable crowd without bumping into your superiors, who it’s considered rude to ask to “feel,” and who, with their greater culture and background, know everything about your actions while you know very little or nothing about theirs. In short, to behave with perfect propriety in Polygonal society, you really should be a Polygon yourself. At least, that’s the hard lesson I’ve learned from my experience.
It is astonishing how much the Art—or I may almost call it instinct—of Sight Recognition is developed by the habitual practice of it and by the avoidance of the custom of “Feeling.” Just as, with you, the deaf and dumb, if once allowed to gesticulate and to use the hand-alphabet, will never acquire the more difficult but far more valuable art of lip-speech and lip-reading, so it is with us as regards “Seeing” and “Feeling.” None who in early life resort to “Feeling” will ever learn “Seeing” in perfection.
It’s amazing how much the skill—or I might even say instinct—of Sight Recognition improves through regular practice and by steering clear of the habit of “Feeling.” Just like for those who are deaf and mute, if they’re allowed to gesture and use sign language, they’ll never master the more complex but much more valuable skill of speaking and reading lips, the same goes for us regarding “Seeing” and “Feeling.” Anyone who relies on “Feeling” in their early years will never fully learn “Seeing.”
For this reason, among our Higher Classes, “Feeling” is discouraged or absolutely forbidden. From the cradle their children, instead of going to the Public Elementary schools (where the art of Feeling is taught,) are sent to higher Seminaries of an exclusive character; and at our illustrious University, to “feel” is regarded as a most serious fault, involving Rustication for the first offence, and Expulsion for the second.
For this reason, in our upper classes, “Feeling” is discouraged or completely banned. From a young age, their children are sent to prestigious private schools instead of public elementary schools (where the skill of Feeling is taught), and at our esteemed university, to “feel” is seen as a major flaw, resulting in suspension for the first offense and expulsion for the second.
But among the lower classes the art of Sight Recognition is regarded as an unattainable luxury. A common Tradesman cannot afford to let his son spend a third of his life in abstract studies. The children of the poor are therefore allowed to “feel” from their earliest years, and they gain thereby a precocity and an early vivacity which contrast at first most favourably with the inert, undeveloped, and listless behaviour of the half-instructed youths of the Polygonal class; but when the latter have at last completed their University course, and are prepared to put their theory into practice, the change that comes over them may almost be described as a new birth, and in every art, science, and social pursuit they rapidly overtake and distance their Triangular competitors.
But for the lower classes, the skill of Sight Recognition is seen as an unattainable luxury. A regular tradesman can’t afford to let his son spend a third of his life on abstract studies. Therefore, poor children are encouraged to “feel” from a young age, which gives them a precociousness and liveliness that initially stands in sharp contrast to the sluggish, underdeveloped behavior of the poorly educated youths from the Polygonal class. However, once these latter youths finally finish their university education and are ready to apply their knowledge, their transformation can almost be described as a new birth. In every art, science, and social endeavor, they quickly surpass and outpace their Triangular competitors.
Only a few of the Polygonal Class fail to pass the Final Test or Leaving Examination at the University. The condition of the unsuccessful minority is truly pitiable. Rejected from the higher class, they are also despised by the lower. They have neither the matured and systematically trained powers of the Polygonal Bachelors and Masters of Arts, nor yet the native precocity and mercurial versatility of the youthful Tradesman. The professions, the public services are closed against them; and though in most States they are not actually debarred from marriage, yet they have the greatest difficulty in forming suitable alliances, as experience shows that the offspring of such unfortunate and ill-endowed parents is generally itself unfortunate, if not positively Irregular.
Only a few students in the Polygonal Class fail to pass the Final Test or Leaving Examination at the University. The situation for those who don't succeed is truly sad. Shunned by the higher class, they are also looked down upon by the lower one. They lack the developed and systematic skills of the Polygonal Bachelors and Masters of Arts, as well as the natural talent and quick adaptability of the young Tradesman. Career opportunities and public services are closed off to them; and although in most states they aren't officially barred from marrying, they face significant challenges in finding suitable partners, as experience shows that children of such unfortunate and poorly equipped parents often end up facing their own difficulties, if not outright irregularities.
It is from these specimens of the refuse of our Nobility that the great Tumults and Seditions of past ages have generally derived their leaders; and so great is the mischief thence arising that an increasing minority of our more progressive Statesmen are of opinion that true mercy would dictate their entire suppression, by enacting that all who fail to pass the Final Examination of the University should be either imprisoned for life, or extinguished by a painless death.
It is from these examples of the waste of our Nobility that the major uproars and revolts of past eras have typically found their leaders; and the harm caused by this is so significant that a growing minority of our more progressive politicians believe that true mercy would require their complete elimination, by making it law that anyone who doesn’t pass the Final Examination of the University should either be imprisoned for life or put to death painlessly.
But I find myself digressing into the subject of Irregularities, a matter of such vital interest that it demands a separate section.
But I find myself getting sidetracked into the topic of Irregularities, something so important that it needs its own section.
§ 7.—Of Irregular Figures.
Throughout the previous pages I have been assuming—what perhaps should have been laid down at the beginning as a distinct and fundamental proposition—that every human being in Flatland is a Regular Figure, that is to say of regular construction. By this I mean that a Woman must not only be a line, but a straight line; that an Artisan or Soldier must have two of his sides equal; that Tradesmen must have three sides equal; Lawyers (of which class I am a humble member), four sides equal, and, generally, that in every Polygon, all the sides must be equal.
Throughout the previous pages, I've been assuming—what perhaps should have been stated from the start as a clear and fundamental point—that every person in Flatland is a Regular Figure, meaning they have a consistent shape. By this, I mean that a Woman must not just be a line, but a straight line; that an Artisan or Soldier must have two equal sides; that Tradesmen must have three equal sides; Lawyers (of which class I am a humble member) must have four equal sides, and, generally, that in every Polygon, all sides must be equal.
The size of the sides would of course depend upon the age of the individual. A Female at birth would be about an inch long, while a tall adult Woman might extend to a foot. As to the Males of every class, it may be roughly said that the length of an adult’s sides, when added together, is three feet or a little more. But the size of our sides is not under consideration. I am speaking of the equality of sides, and it does not need much reflection to see that the whole of the social life in Flatland rests upon the fundamental fact that Nature wills all Figures to have their sides equal.
The size of the sides would obviously depend on the individual's age. A female at birth would be about an inch long, while a tall adult woman might be up to a foot. As for the males of every class, it can be roughly said that the total length of an adult's sides is about three feet or a little more. However, the size of our sides isn’t what we’re focusing on. I’m talking about the equality of sides, and it doesn’t take much thought to realize that the entire social structure in Flatland is based on the fundamental fact that Nature wants all Figures to have equal sides.
If our sides were unequal our angles would be unequal. Instead of its being sufficient to feel, or estimate by sight, a single angle in order to determine the form of an individual, it would be necessary to ascertain each angle by the experiment of Feeling. But life would be too short for such a tedious groping. The whole science and art of Sight Recognition would at once perish; Feeling, so far as it is an art, would not long survive; intercourse would become perilous or impossible; there would be an end to all confidence, all forethought; no one would be safe in making the most simple social arrangements; in a word, civilization would relapse into barbarism.
If our sides were uneven, our angles would be uneven too. Instead of just needing to feel or see one angle to understand the shape of something, we would have to figure out each angle by touch. But life would be too short for such a slow process. The entire science and art of understanding through sight would vanish; touch, as an art, wouldn't last long either; communication would become dangerous or impossible; trust and planning would disappear; no one would feel secure making even the simplest social plans; in short, civilization would fall back into chaos.
Am I going too fast to carry my Readers with me to these obvious conclusions? Surely a moment’s reflection, and a single instance from common life, must convince every one that our whole social system is based upon Regularity, or Equality of Angles. You meet, for example, two or three Tradesmen in the street, whom you recognize at once to be Tradesmen by a glance at their angles and rapidly bedimmed sides, and you ask them to step into your house to lunch. This you do at present with perfect confidence, because every one knows to an inch or two the area occupied by an adult Triangle: but imagine that your Tradesman drags behind his regular and respectable vertex, a parallelogram of twelve or thirteen inches in diagonal:—what are you to do with such a monster sticking fast in your house door?
Am I going too fast for my readers to follow me to these obvious conclusions? Surely, with just a moment's thought and a simple example from everyday life, anyone can see that our entire social system is built on Regularity or Equal Angles. For instance, you might see two or three tradespeople on the street, and you instantly recognize them as tradespeople by the angles and slightly worn edges of their appearance, and you invite them into your home for lunch. You do this confidently because everyone knows the rough size of an adult Triangle: but imagine if your tradesperson showed up with a parallelogram stretching twelve or thirteen inches diagonally—what would you do with such a huge shape stuck in your doorway?
But I am insulting the intelligence of my Readers by accumulating details which must be patent to every one who enjoys the advantages of a Residence in Spaceland. Obviously the measurements of a single angle would no longer be sufficient under such portentous circumstances; one’s whole life would be taken up in feeling or surveying the perimeter of one’s acquaintances. Already the difficulties of avoiding a collision in a crowd are enough to tax the sagacity of even a well-educated Square; but if no one could calculate the Regularity of a single figure in the company, all would be chaos and confusion, and the slightest panic would cause serious injuries, or—if there happened to be any Women or Soldiers present—perhaps considerable loss of life.
But I’m underestimating the intelligence of my readers by piling on details that must be obvious to anyone living in Spaceland. Clearly, measuring a single angle wouldn’t be enough in such extraordinary situations; your entire life would be spent navigating or assessing the space around your acquaintances. The challenges of not colliding with someone in a crowd are already enough to test the smarts of even a well-educated Square; but if no one could figure out the regularity of a single shape in the group, it would all be chaos and confusion, and the smallest panic could lead to serious injuries, or—if there were any women or soldiers around—possibly significant loss of life.
Expediency therefore concurs with Nature in stamping the seal of its approval upon Regularity of conformation: nor has the Law been backward in seconding their efforts. “Irregularity of Figure” means with us the same as, or more than, a combination of moral obliquity and criminality with you, and is treated accordingly. There are not wanting, it is true, some promulgators of paradoxes who maintain that there is no necessary connection between geometrical and moral Irregularity. “The Irregular,” they say, “is from his birth scouted by his own parents, derided by his brothers and sisters, neglected by the domestics, scorned and suspected by society, and excluded from all posts of responsibility, trust, and useful activity. His every movement is jealously watched by the police till he comes of age and presents himself for inspection; then he is either destroyed, if he is found to exceed the fixed margin of deviation, or else immured in a Government Office as a clerk of the seventh class; prevented from marriage; forced to drudge at an uninteresting occupation for a miserable stipend; obliged to live and board at the office, and to take even his vacation under close supervision; what wonder that human nature, even in the best and purest, is embittered and perverted by such surroundings!”
Expediency, therefore, aligns with Nature in giving its approval to the regularity of form; the Law has also been quick to support their efforts. “Irregularity of Shape” for us means the same as, or even more than, a mix of moral corruption and criminality for you, and is treated as such. It’s true that there are some people who proclaim paradoxes and argue that there’s no necessary link between geometric and moral Irregularity. “The Irregular,” they argue, “is scorned by his own parents from birth, mocked by his siblings, ignored by the household staff, scorned and suspected by society, and excluded from any positions of responsibility, trust, and meaningful work. Every move he makes is closely monitored by the authorities until he reaches adulthood and presents himself for scrutiny; then he is either eliminated if he strays too far from the standard, or locked away in a government office as a seventh-class clerk; barred from marriage; forced to toil at an unfulfilling job for a meager salary; required to live and eat at the office, and even take his vacation under strict supervision; is it any surprise that human nature, even in its best and purest forms, gets twisted and embittered by such conditions?”
All this very plausible reasoning does not convince me, as it has not convinced the wisest of our Statesmen, that our ancestors erred in laying it down as an axiom of policy that the toleration of Irregularity is incompatible with the safety of the State. Doubtless, the life of an Irregular is hard; but the interests of the Greater Number require that it shall be hard. If a man with a triangular front and a polygonal back were allowed to exist and to propagate a still more Irregular posterity, what would become of the arts of life? Are the houses and doors and churches in Flatland to be altered in order to accommodate such monsters? Are our ticket-collectors to be required to measure every man’s perimeter before they allow him to enter a theatre, or to take his place in a lecture room? Is an Irregular to be exempted from the militia? And if not, how is he to be prevented from carrying desolation into the ranks of his comrades? Again, what irresistible temptations to fraudulent impostures must needs beset such a creature! How easy for him to enter a shop with his polygonal front foremost, and to order goods to any extent from a confiding tradesman! Let the advocates of a falsely called Philanthropy plead as they may for the abrogation of the Irregular Penal Laws, I for my part have never known an Irregular who was not also what Nature evidently intended him to be—a hypocrite, a misanthropist, and, up to the limits of his power—a perpetrator of all manner of mischief.
All this seemingly reasonable reasoning doesn’t convince me, and it hasn’t convinced the wisest of our politicians, that our ancestors were wrong in establishing as a fundamental principle of policy that tolerating irregularity puts the safety of the State at risk. Certainly, life for an irregular person is tough; but the interests of the majority demand that it remains difficult. If someone with a triangular front and a polygonal back were allowed to exist and create an even more irregular offspring, what would happen to the essentials of life? Are we supposed to change our houses, doors, and churches in Flatland to accommodate such freaks? Are our ticket collectors required to measure each person’s perimeter before letting them into a theater or a lecture hall? Should an irregular person be excused from military service? And if they aren’t, how can we stop them from bringing chaos into the ranks of their fellow soldiers? Furthermore, what irresistible temptations to deceit must face such a being! How easy would it be for him to enter a shop with his polygonal front and order goods in large quantities from a trusting shopkeeper! Let the advocates of a wrongly termed Philanthropy argue as they wish for the repeal of the Irregular Penal Laws; I, for one, have never known an irregular person who wasn’t also what Nature clearly meant him to be—a hypocrite, a misanthrope, and, as far as he is able, a doer of all kinds of harm.
Not that I should be disposed to recommend (at present) the extreme measures adopted in some States, where an infant whose angle deviates by half a degree from the correct angularity is summarily destroyed at birth. Some of our highest and ablest men, men of real genius, have during their earliest days laboured under deviations as great as, or even greater than, forty-five minutes: and the loss of their precious lives would have been an irreparable injury to the State. The art of healing also has achieved some of its most glorious triumphs in the compressions, extensions, trepannings, colligations, and other surgical or diætetic operations by which Irregularity has been partly or wholly cured. Advocating therefore a Via Media, I would lay down no fixed or absolute line of demarcation; but at the period when the frame is just beginning to set, and when the Medical Board has reported that recovery is improbable, I would suggest that the Irregular offspring be painlessly and mercifully consumed.
Not that I would currently recommend the extreme measures taken in some states, where an infant whose angle is off by half a degree from the correct angle is immediately killed at birth. Some of our most brilliant and capable individuals, true geniuses, have faced deviations as significant as, or even greater than, forty-five minutes during their early days: losing their valuable lives would have been a huge loss for the state. The field of medicine has also achieved some of its greatest successes in the compressions, extensions, surgeries, and other medical procedures through which irregularities have been partially or completely corrected. Therefore, advocating for a Via Media, I would not set a strict or absolute line of separation; but at the time when the body is just starting to set, and when the Medical Board has indicated that recovery is unlikely, I would suggest that the irregular offspring be painlessly and compassionately put to rest.
§ 8.—Of the Ancient Practice of Painting.
If my Readers have followed me with any attention up to this point, they will not be surprised to hear that life is somewhat dull in Flatland. I do not, of course, mean that there are not battles, conspiracies, tumults, factions, and all those other phenomena which are supposed to make History interesting; nor would I deny that the strange mixture of the problems of life and the problems of Mathematics, continually inducing conjecture and giving the opportunity of immediate verification, imparts to our existence a zest which you in Spaceland can hardly comprehend. I speak now from the æsthetic and artistic point of view when I say that life with us is dull; æsthetically and artistically, very dull indeed.
If my readers have been paying attention so far, they won’t be surprised to learn that life in Flatland is pretty boring. I don’t mean to say that there aren’t battles, conspiracies, riots, factions, and all those things that are supposed to make history exciting; nor would I deny that the weird combination of life’s challenges and math problems, constantly leading to new ideas and allowing for quick tests of those ideas, adds a little excitement to our lives that you in Spaceland might find hard to grasp. But from an artistic and aesthetic perspective, I can honestly say that life here is dull; aesthetically and artistically, very dull indeed.
How can it be otherwise, when all one’s prospect, all one’s landscapes, historical pieces, portraits, flowers, still life, are nothing but a single line, with no varieties except degrees of brightness and obscurity?
How can it be any different when everything you see, all your views, historical scenes, portraits, flowers, and still life, are just a single line, with no variations other than different levels of brightness and darkness?
It was not always thus. Colour, if Tradition speaks the truth, once for the space of half a dozen centuries or more, threw a transient charm upon the lives of our ancestors in the remotest ages. Some private individual—a Pentagon whose name is variously reported—having casually discovered the constituents of the simpler colours and a rudimentary method of painting, is said to have begun by decorating first his house, then his slaves, then his Father, his Sons and Grandsons, lastly himself. The convenience as well as the beauty of the results commended themselves to all. Wherever Chromatistes,—for by that name the most trustworthy authorities concur in calling him,—turned his variegated frame, there he at once excited attention, and attracted respect. No one now needed to “feel” him; no one mistook his front for his back; all his movements were readily ascertained by his neighbours without the slightest strain on their powers of calculation; no one jostled him, or failed to make way for him; his voice was saved the labour of that exhausting utterance by which we colourless Squares and Pentagons are often forced to proclaim our individuality when we move amid a crowd of ignorant Isosceles.
It wasn’t always like this. If tradition is to be believed, color once added a temporary charm to the lives of our ancestors for more than six centuries. A private individual—a Pentagon, whose name varies by account—happened upon the elements of simple colors and came up with a basic way to paint. It’s said that he started by decorating his house, then his slaves, then his father, his sons, and grandsons, and finally himself. The usefulness and beauty of the results appealed to everyone. Wherever Chromatistes—which is the name that the most reliable sources agree on—went with his colorful appearance, he immediately drew attention and earned respect. No one needed to “feel” him; no one confused his front for his back; all his movements were easily understood by those around him without straining their ability to figure things out; no one pushed him aside or failed to give him space; his voice didn’t have to go through the exhausting effort we colorless Squares and Pentagons often have to use to assert our individuality when we’re in a crowd of clueless Isosceles.
The fashion spread like wildfire. Before a week was over, every Square and Triangle in the district had copied the example of Chromatistes, and only a few of the more conservative Pentagons still held out. A month or two found even the Dodecagons infected with the innovation. A year had not elapsed before the habit had spread to all but the very highest of the Nobility. Needless to say, the custom soon made its way from the district of Chromatistes to surrounding regions; and within two generations no one in all Flatland was colourless except the Women and the Priests.
The trend spread like wildfire. Within a week, every Square and Triangle in the district had copied Chromatistes, and only a few of the more traditional Pentagons resisted. In a month or two, even the Dodecagons had caught on to the change. Within a year, the habit had spread to almost all of the upper echelons of the Nobility. Unsurprisingly, the custom quickly made its way from Chromatistes's district to the neighboring areas, and within two generations, the only colorless people in all of Flatland were the Women and the Priests.
Here Nature herself appeared to erect a barrier, and to plead against extending the innovation to these two classes. Many-sidedness was almost essential as a pretext for the Innovators. “Distinction of sides is intended by Nature to imply distinction of colours”—such was the sophism which in those days flew from mouth to mouth, converting whole towns at a time to the new culture. But manifestly to our Priests and Women this adage did not apply. The latter had only one side, and therefore—plurally and pedantically speaking—no sides. The former—if at least they would assert their claim to be really and truly Circles, and not mere high-class Polygons with an infinitely large number of infinitesimally small sides—were in the habit of boasting (what Women confessed and deplored) that they also had no sides, being blessed with a perimeter of one line or, in other words, a Circumference. Hence it came to pass that these two Classes could see no force in the so-called axiom about “Distinction of Sides implying Distinction of Colour”; and when all others had succumbed to the fascinations of corporal decoration, the Priests and the Women alone still remained pure from the pollution of paint.
Here, Nature seemed to set up a barrier and argue against expanding the innovation to these two groups. Having many sides was almost necessary as a reason for the Innovators. “The distinction of sides is meant by Nature to signify a distinction of colors”—this was the reasoning that spread from person to person, converting entire towns to the new culture. But clearly, this saying didn’t apply to our Priests and Women. The latter had only one side and therefore—technically speaking—no sides. The former—if they would claim to be true Circles and not just high-class Polygons with an infinitely large number of infinitesimally small sides—were known to boast (what Women acknowledged and lamented) that they also had no sides, being blessed with a perimeter of one line or, in other words, a Circumference. As a result, these two Classes could see no validity in the so-called axiom about “Distinction of Sides implying Distinction of Colour”; and while everyone else succumbed to the allure of physical decoration, only the Priests and the Women remained untouched by the taint of paint.
Immoral, licentious, anarchical, unscientific—call them by what names you will—yet, from an æsthetic point of view, those ancient days of the Colour Revolt were the glorious childhood of Art in Flatland—a childhood, alas, that never ripened into manhood, nor even reached the blossom of youth. To live was then in itself a delight, because living implied seeing. Even at a small party, the company was a pleasure to behold; the richly varied hues of the assembly in a church or theatre are said to have more than once proved too distracting for our greatest teachers and actors; but most ravishing of all is said to have been the unspeakable magnificence of a military review.
Immoral, indulgent, chaotic, unscientific—call them what you want—yet, from an aesthetic standpoint, those ancient days of the Colour Revolt were the glorious childhood of Art in Flatland—a childhood, sadly, that never matured into adulthood, nor even reached the bloom of youth. Living back then was a joy in itself, because to live meant to see. Even at a small gathering, the people were a treat to look at; the rich variety of colors in a crowd at a church or theater is said to have been too distracting for our greatest teachers and actors more than once; but most stunning of all is said to have been the indescribable splendor of a military parade.
The sight of a line of battle of twenty thousand Isosceles suddenly facing about, and exchanging the sombre black of their bases for the orange and purple of the two sides including their acute angle; the militia of the Equilateral Triangles tricoloured in red, white, and blue; the mauve, ultramarine, gamboge, and burnt umber of the Square artillerymen rapidly rotating near their vermilion guns; the dashing and flashing of the five-coloured and six-coloured Pentagons and Hexagons careering across the field in their offices of surgeons, geometricians and aides-de-camp—all these may well have been sufficient to render credible the famous story how an illustrious Circle, overcome by the artistic beauty of the forces under his command, threw aside his marshal’s bâton and his royal crown, exclaiming that he henceforth exchanged them for the artist’s pencil. How great and glorious the sensuous development of these days must have been is in part indicated by the very language and vocabulary of the period. The commonest utterances of the commonest citizens in the time of the Colour Revolt seem to have been suffused with a richer tinge of word or thought; and to that era we are even now indebted for our finest poetry and for whatever rhythm still remains in the more scientific utterance of these modern days.
The sight of twenty thousand Isosceles suddenly turning around and trading the dark black of their bases for the vibrant orange and purple of their two sides, including their sharp angle; the militia of the Equilateral Triangles in red, white, and blue; the mauve, ultramarine, gamboge, and burnt umber of the Square artillerymen quickly spinning near their bright red guns; the dazzling and vibrant Pentagons and Hexagons racing across the field in their roles as surgeons, mathematicians, and aides-de-camp—all of this could easily make credible the well-known tale of an esteemed Circle, overwhelmed by the artistic beauty of his forces, who cast aside his marshal’s baton and royal crown, proclaiming that he would trade them for the artist’s pencil. How magnificent and glorious the artistic growth of those days must have been is partly reflected in the very language and vocabulary of the time. The simplest remarks of ordinary citizens during the Colour Revolt seem to have been filled with a richer hue of words and ideas; and to that era, we are still indebted for our finest poetry and for whatever rhythm remains in the more scientific expressions of today.
§ 9.—Of the Universal Colour Bill.
But meanwhile the intellectual Arts were fast decaying.
But in the meantime, the intellectual arts were rapidly declining.
The Art of Sight Recognition, being no longer needed, was no longer practised; and the studies of Geometry, Statics, Kinetics, and other kindred subjects, came soon to be considered superfluous, and fell into disrepute and neglect even at our University. The inferior Art of Feeling speedily experienced the same fate at our Elementary Schools. Then the Isosceles classes, asserting that the Specimens were no longer used nor needed, and refusing to pay the customary tribute from the Criminal classes to the service of Education, waxed daily more numerous and more insolent on the strength of their immunity from the old burden which had formerly exercised the twofold wholesome effect of at once taming their brutal nature and thinning their excessive numbers.
The Art of Sight Recognition, no longer necessary, was no longer practiced; and studies like Geometry, Statics, Kinetics, and other related subjects soon came to be seen as unnecessary and fell into disfavor and neglect even at our University. The lesser Art of Feeling quickly met the same fate in our Elementary Schools. Then the Isosceles classes, claiming that the Specimens were no longer used or needed, and refusing to contribute the usual tax from the Criminal classes to support Education, grew daily in number and confidence, emboldened by their freedom from the old burden that had once helped to tame their brutal nature and reduce their excessive numbers.
Year by year the Soldiers and Artisans began more vehemently to assert—and with increasing truth—that there was no great difference between them and the very highest class of Polygons, now that they were raised to an equality with the latter, and enabled to grapple with all the difficulties and solve all the problems of life, whether Statical and Kinetical, by the simple process of Colour Recognition. Not content with the natural neglect into which Sight Recognition was falling, they began boldly to demand the legal prohibition of all “monopolising and aristocratic Arts” and the consequent abolition of all endowments for the studies of Sight Recognition, Mathematics, and Feeling. Soon, they began to insist that inasmuch as Colour, which was a second Nature, had destroyed the need of aristocratic distinctions, the Law should follow in the same path, and that henceforth all individuals and all classes should be recognized as absolutely equal and entitled to equal rights.
Year after year, the Soldiers and Artisans began to assert more strongly—and with increasing validity—that there was no significant difference between them and the highest class of Polygons, especially now that they were on equal footing and able to tackle all the challenges and solve all the problems of life, whether Static or Kinetic, through the straightforward process of Colour Recognition. Not satisfied with the natural decline of Sight Recognition, they boldly called for a legal ban on all “monopolizing and aristocratic Arts” and the resulting elimination of all funding for the studies of Sight Recognition, Mathematics, and Feeling. Soon, they began to demand that since Colour, which was a second Nature, had eliminated the need for aristocratic distinctions, the Law should align with this and that from then on, all individuals and all classes should be recognized as completely equal and entitled to the same rights.
Finding the higher Orders wavering and undecided, the leaders of the Revolution advanced still further in their requirements, and at last demanded that all classes alike, the Priests and the Women not excepted, should do homage to Colour by submitting to be painted. When it was objected that Priests and Women had no sides, they retorted that Nature and Expediency concurred in dictating that the front half of every human being (that is to say, the half containing his eye and mouth) should be distinguishable from his hinder half. They therefore brought before a general and extraordinary Assembly of all the States of Flatland a Bill proposing that in every Woman the half containing the eye and mouth should be coloured red, and the other half green. The Priests were to be painted in the same way, red being applied to that semicircle in which the eye and mouth formed the middle point; while the other or hinder semicircle was to be coloured green.
Finding the higher Orders uncertain and indecisive, the leaders of the Revolution pushed further in their demands, ultimately insisting that all classes, including Priests and Women, should honor Color by agreeing to be painted. When it was pointed out that Priests and Women had no sides, they responded that Nature and Practicality dictated that the front half of every person (meaning the half with the eye and mouth) should be distinguishable from the back half. They then presented to a general and extraordinary Assembly of all the States of Flatland a Bill proposing that in every Woman, the half with the eye and mouth should be colored red, while the other half should be green. The Priests would be painted the same way, with red applied to the semicircle where the eye and mouth were centered, and the other or back semicircle colored green.
There was no little cunning in this proposal, which indeed emanated, not from any Isosceles—for no being so degraded would have had angularity enough to appreciate, much less to devise, such a model of state-craft—but from an Irregular Circle who, instead of being destroyed in his childhood, was reserved by a foolish indulgence to bring desolation on his country and destruction on myriads of his followers.
There was a lot of cleverness in this proposal, which actually came not from any Isosceles—since no being so lowly would have had the sharpness to appreciate, let alone create, such a model of governance—but from an Irregular Circle who, instead of being eliminated in his youth, was spared by foolish leniency to bring ruin to his country and devastation to countless followers.
On the one hand the proposition was calculated to bring the Women in all classes over to the side of the Chromatic Innovation. For by assigning to the Women the same two colours as were assigned to the Priests, the Revolutionists thereby ensured that, in certain positions, every Woman would appear like a Priest, and be treated with corresponding respect and deference—a prospect that could not fail to attract the Female Sex in a mass.
On one hand, the idea was designed to win over women from all social classes to support Chromatic Innovation. By giving women the same two colors as the priests, the revolutionaries ensured that in certain situations, every woman would look like a priest and receive the same respect and consideration—an appealing prospect that would likely draw women in large numbers.
But by some of my Readers the possibility of the identical appearance of Priests and Women, under the new Legislation, may not be recognized; if so, a word or two will make it obvious.
But some of my readers may not see the possibility of Priests and Women looking the same under the new legislation; if that's the case, a brief explanation will clarify it.
Imagine a woman duly decorated, according to the new Code; with the front half (i.e. the half containing eye and mouth) red, and with the hinder half green. Look at her from one side. Obviously you will see a straight line, half red, half green.
Imagine a woman properly adorned according to the new Code; with the front half (i.e. the half containing the eye and mouth) red, and the back half green. If you look at her from one side, you’ll clearly see a straight line, half red, half green.

Now imagine a Priest, whose mouth is at M, and whose front semicircle (AMB) is consequently coloured red, while his hinder semicircle is green; so that the diameter AB divides the green from the red. If you contemplate the Great Man so as to have your eye in the same straight line as his dividing diameter (AB), what you will see will be a straight line (CBD), of which one half (CB) will be red, and the other (BD) green. The whole line (CD) will be rather shorter perhaps than that of a full-sized Woman, and will shade off more rapidly towards its extremities; but the identity of the colours would give you an immediate impression of identity if not Class, making you neglectful of other details. Bear in mind the decay of Sight Recognition which threatened society at the time of the Colour Revolt; add too the certainty that Women would speedily learn to shade off their extremities so as to imitate the Circles; it must then be surely obvious to you, my dear Reader, that the Colour Bill placed us under a great danger of confounding a Priest with a young Woman.
Now picture a Priest, whose mouth is at M, and whose front semicircle (AMB) is colored red, while the back semicircle is green; so the diameter AB separates the green from the red. If you observe the Great Man with your eye aligned along his dividing diameter (AB), you’ll see a straight line (CBD), where one half (CB) will be red, and the other (BD) green. The entire line (CD) might be slightly shorter than that of a full-sized Woman and will fade more quickly towards the ends; however, the similarity in colors would create an immediate impression of sameness, if not Class, causing you to overlook other details. Remember the decline in visual recognition that threatened society during the Colour Revolt; also consider that Women would soon learn to blend their extremities to mimic the Circles; it should be clear to you, my dear Reader, that the Colour Bill put us at serious risk of confusing a Priest with a young Woman.
How attractive this prospect must have been to the Frail Sex may readily be imagined. They anticipated with delight the confusion that would ensue. At home they might hear political and ecclesiastical secrets intended not for them but for their husbands and brothers, and might even issue commands in the name of a priestly Circle; out of doors the striking combination of red and green, without addition of any other colours, would be sure to lead the common people into endless mistakes, and the Women would gain whatever the Circles lost, in the deference of the passers by. As for the scandal that would befall the Circular Class if the frivolous and unseemly conduct of the Women were imputed to them, and as to the consequent subversion of the Constitution, the Female Sex could not be expected to give a thought to these considerations. Even in the households of the Circles, the Women were all in favour of the Universal Colour Bill.
How appealing this prospect must have seemed to women is easy to imagine. They eagerly anticipated the chaos that would follow. At home, they could stumble upon political and church secrets that were meant for their husbands and brothers, and might even issue commands in the name of a priestly Circle. Outside, the striking combination of red and green, without any other colors, would surely lead the common people into endless confusion, and the women would gain whatever respect the Circles lost from those passing by. As for the scandal that would fall on the Circular Class if the frivolous and inappropriate behavior of women was blamed on them, and the potential disruption of the Constitution that would result, women were unlikely to worry about those things. Even within the households of the Circles, women were all in favor of the Universal Colour Bill.
The second object aimed at by the Bill was the gradual demoralization of the Circles themselves. In the general intellectual decay they still preserved their pristine clearness and strength of understanding. From their earliest childhood, familiarized in their Circular households with the total absence of Colour, the Nobles alone preserved the Sacred Art of Sight Recognition, with all the advantages that result from that admirable training of the intellect. Hence, up to the date of the introduction of the Universal Colour Bill, the Circles had not only held their own, but even increased their lead of other classes by abstinence from the popular fashion.
The second goal of the Bill was to slowly demoralize the Circles themselves. Despite the overall decline in intellect, they still maintained their original clarity and strength of understanding. From a young age, raised in their Circular households where Color was completely absent, only the Nobles kept the Sacred Art of Sight Recognition, along with all the benefits that came from that excellent intellectual training. Therefore, by the time the Universal Colour Bill was introduced, the Circles not only maintained their position but even extended their advantage over other classes by avoiding the trendy styles.
Now therefore the artful Irregular whom I described above as the real author of this diabolical Bill, determined at one blow to lower the status of the Hierarchy by forcing them to submit to the pollution of Colour, and at the same time to destroy their domestic opportunities of training in the Art of Sight Recognition, so as to enfeeble their intellects by depriving them of their pure and colourless homes. Once subjected to the chromatic taint, every parental and every childish Circle would demoralize each other. Only in discerning between the Father and the Mother would the Circular infant find problems for the exercise of its understanding—problems too often likely to be corrupted by maternal impostures with the result of shaking the child’s faith in all logical conclusions. Thus by degrees the intellectual lustre of the Priestly Order would wane, and the road would then lie open for a total destruction of all Aristocratic Legislature and for the subversion of our Privileged Classes.
Now, the crafty irregular I mentioned earlier as the true creator of this wicked bill was determined to simultaneously undermine the status of the hierarchy by forcing them to accept the contamination of color, while also ruining their chances for training in the art of sight recognition, thereby weakening their minds by denying them their pure and color-free homes. Once exposed to this color taint, every parental and childish circle would corrupt one another. The circular infant would only find challenges in distinguishing between the father and the mother—challenges that would often be distorted by maternal deceit, resulting in shaking the child's faith in all logical conclusions. Gradually, the intellectual brilliance of the priestly order would fade, and this would pave the way for the complete dismantling of all aristocratic legislation and the overthrow of our privileged classes.
§ 10.—Of the Suppression of the Chromatic Sedition.
The agitation for the Universal Colour Bill continued for three years; and up to the last moment of that period it seemed as though Anarchy were destined to triumph.
The push for the Universal Colour Bill went on for three years, and right up until the very end of that period, it felt like chaos was set to win.
A whole army of Polygons, who turned out to fight as private soldiers, was utterly annihilated by a superior force of Isosceles Triangles—the Squares and Pentagons meanwhile remaining neutral. Worse than all, some of the ablest Circles fell a prey to conjugal fury. Infuriated by political animosity, the wives in many a noble household wearied their lords with prayers to give up their opposition to the Colour Bill; and some, finding their entreaties fruitless, fell on and slaughtered their innocent children and husbands, perishing themselves in the act of carnage. It is recorded that during that triennial agitation no less than twenty-three Circles perished in domestic discord.
A whole army of Polygons, who showed up to fight as regular soldiers, was completely wiped out by a stronger force of Isosceles Triangles—the Squares and Pentagons, meanwhile, stayed neutral. Even worse, some of the most capable Circles became victims of marital rage. Driven mad by political anger, the wives in many elite families nagged their husbands to stop opposing the Colour Bill; and some, finding their pleas had no effect, turned on and killed their innocent children and husbands, dying themselves in the process. It's noted that during that three-year struggle, at least twenty-three Circles lost their lives in family conflicts.
Great indeed was the peril. It seemed as though the Priests had no choice between submission and extermination; when suddenly the course of events was completely changed by one of those picturesque incidents which Statesmen ought never to neglect, often to anticipate, and sometimes perhaps to originate, because of the absurdly disproportionate power with which they appeal to the sympathies of the populace.
Great was the danger. It seemed like the Priests had no option but to either submit or be wiped out; when suddenly, the situation was completely altered by one of those striking incidents that Statesmen should never ignore, often anticipate, and sometimes even create, due to the overwhelmingly disproportionate impact they have on public sentiment.
It happened that an Isosceles of a low type, with a brain little if at all above four degrees—accidentally dabbling in the colours of some Tradesman whose shop he had plundered—painted himself, or caused himself to be painted (for the story varies) with the twelve colours of a Dodecahedron. Going into the Market Place he accosted in a feigned voice a maiden, the orphan daughter of a noble Polygon, whose affection in former days he had sought in vain; and by a series of deceptions, aided on the one side by a string of lucky accidents too long to relate, and, on the other, by an almost inconceivable fatuity and neglect of ordinary precautions on the part of the relations of the bride, he succeeded in consummating the marriage. The unhappy girl committed suicide on discovering the fraud to which she had been subjected.
It so happened that a second-rate Isosceles, with a mind barely above four degrees—happened to dabble in the colors of a Tradesman whose shop he had robbed—painted himself, or had himself painted (the details vary) in the twelve colors of a Dodecahedron. Heading into the Market Place, he approached, using a fake voice, a young woman, the orphan daughter of a noble Polygon, whose love he had previously sought in vain; and through a series of tricks, supported on one side by a string of fortunate events too lengthy to detail, and, on the other, by an almost unbelievable foolishness and lack of common sense from the bride's relatives, he managed to complete the marriage. The unfortunate girl took her own life upon discovering the deception she had endured.
When the news of this catastrophe spread from State to State the minds of the Women were violently agitated. Sympathy with the miserable victim and anticipations of similar deceptions for themselves, their sisters, and their daughters, made them now regard the Colour Bill in an entirely new aspect. Not a few openly avowed themselves converted to antagonism; the rest needed only a slight stimulus to make a similar avowal. Seizing this favourable opportunity the Circles hastily convened an extraordinary Assembly of the States; and besides the usual guard of Convicts, they secured the attendance of a large number of reactionary Women.
When the news of this disaster spread from state to state, the women were deeply unsettled. Their sympathy for the unfortunate victim and fears of experiencing similar deceptions themselves, along with their sisters and daughters, led them to view the Color Bill in a completely different light. Many openly declared their opposition; the rest just needed a little push to do the same. Taking advantage of this moment, the Circles quickly gathered an extraordinary Assembly of the States; and in addition to the usual guard of convicts, they ensured that a large number of conservative women were present.
Amidst an unprecedented concourse, the Chief Circle of those days—by name Pantocyclus—arose to find himself hissed and hooted by a hundred and twenty thousand Isosceles. But he secured silence by declaring that henceforth the Circles would enter on a policy of Concession; yielding to the wishes of the majority, they would accept the Colour Bill. The uproar being at once converted to applause, he invited Chromatistes, the leader of the Sedition, into the centre of the hall, to receive in the name of his followers the submission of the Hierarchy. Then followed a speech, a masterpiece of rhetoric, which occupied nearly a day in the delivery, and to which no summary can do justice.
Amidst an unprecedented gathering, the Chief Circle of those times—named Pantocyclus—found himself being booed and jeered at by a hundred and twenty thousand Isosceles. However, he gained their attention by announcing that from then on, the Circles would adopt a policy of Concession; by giving in to the wishes of the majority, they would accept the Colour Bill. The uproar instantly turned into applause, and he invited Chromatistes, the leader of the Sedition, to the center of the hall, to accept in the name of his followers the Hierarchy's submission. Then came a speech, a rhetorical masterpiece, which took nearly a day to deliver, and no summary can do it justice.
With a grave appearance of impartiality he declared that as they were now finally committing themselves to Reform or Innovation, it was desirable that they should take one last view of the perimeter of the whole subject, its defects as well as its advantages. Gradually introducing the mention of the dangers to the Tradesmen, the Professional Classes and the Gentlemen, he silenced the rising murmurs of the Isosceles by reminding them that, in spite of all these defects, he was willing to accept the Bill if it was approved by the majority. But it was manifest that all, except the Isosceles, were moved by his words and were either neutral or averse to the Bill.
With a serious look of neutrality, he stated that since they were finally committing themselves to Reform or Innovation, it was important to take one last look at the entire topic, including its flaws as well as its benefits. Gradually bringing up the risks to the Tradesmen, the Professional Classes, and the Gentlemen, he quieted the growing protests from the Isosceles by reminding them that despite all these flaws, he was willing to support the Bill if it was approved by the majority. It was clear that everyone, except the Isosceles, was influenced by his words and was either neutral or opposed to the Bill.
Turning now to the Workmen he asserted that their interests must not be neglected, and that, if they intended to accept the Colour Bill, they ought at least to do so with a full view of the consequences. Many of them, he said, were on the point of being admitted to the class of the Regular Triangles; others anticipated for their children a distinction they could not hope for themselves. That honourable ambition would now have to be sacrificed. With the universal adoption of Colour, all distinctions would cease; Regularity would be confused with Irregularity; development would give place to retrogression; the Workman would in a few generations be degraded to the level of the Military, or even the Convict Class; political power would be in the hands of the greatest number, that is to say the Criminal Classes, who were already more numerous than the Workmen, and would soon out-number all the other Classes put together when the usual Compensative Laws of Nature were violated.
Turning now to the workers, he emphasized that their interests shouldn’t be overlooked, and if they planned to accept the Colour Bill, they ought to consider the consequences fully. Many of them were on the verge of being recognized as Regular Triangles; others were hoping for a distinction for their children that they could never achieve themselves. That noble ambition would now have to be sacrificed. With the widespread adoption of Colour, all distinctions would vanish; Regularity would be mixed up with Irregularity; growth would give way to decline; the workers would, in a few generations, be lowered to the level of the Military or even the Convict Class; political power would shift to the largest group, which meant the Criminal Classes, already more numerous than the workers, and soon to outnumber all the other classes combined when the usual Balancing Laws of Nature were disrupted.
A subdued murmur of assent ran through the ranks of the Artisans, and Chromatistes, in alarm, attempted to step forward and address them. But he found himself encompassed with guards and forced to remain silent while the Chief Circle in a few impassioned words made a final appeal to the Women, exclaiming that, if the Colour Bill passed, no marriage would henceforth be safe, no woman’s honour secure; fraud, deception, hypocrisy would pervade every household; domestic bliss would share the fate of the Constitution and pass to speedy perdition. Sooner than this, he cried “Come death.”
A quiet murmur of agreement moved through the group of Artisans, and Chromatistes, alarmed, tried to step forward to speak to them. But he found himself surrounded by guards and forced to stay silent while the Chief Circle, in a few passionate words, made a final plea to the Women, shouting that if the Colour Bill passed, no marriage would be safe, and no woman’s honor would be secure; lies, deceit, and hypocrisy would fill every home; domestic happiness would meet the same fate as the Constitution and quickly vanish. “I would rather face death than allow this,” he cried.
At these words, which were the preconcerted signal for action, the Isosceles Convicts fell on and transfixed the wretched Chromatistes; the Regular Classes opening their ranks, made way for a band of Women who, under direction of the Circles, moved, back foremost, invisibly and unerringly upon the unconscious Soldiers; the Artisans, imitating the example of their betters, also opened their ranks. Meantime bands of Convicts occupied every entrance with an impenetrable phalanx.
At these words, which were the agreed signal to start, the Isosceles Convicts rushed at and pinned down the unfortunate Chromatistes; the Regular Classes parted their ranks to allow a group of Women, guided by the Circles, to move backward silently and precisely toward the unsuspecting Soldiers; the Artisans, following the lead of their superiors, also opened their ranks. Meanwhile, groups of Convicts blocked every entrance with an unbreakable formation.
The battle, or rather carnage, was of short duration. Under the skilful generalship of the Circles almost every Woman’s charge was fatal, and very many extracted their sting uninjured, ready for a second slaughter. But no second blow was needed; the rabble of the Isosceles did the rest of the business for themselves. Surprised, leader-less, attacked in front by invisible foes, and finding egress cut off by the Convicts behind them, they at once—after their manner—lost all presence of mind, and raised the cry of “treachery.” This sealed their fate. Every Isosceles now saw and felt a foe in every other. In half an hour not one of that vast multitude was living; and the fragments of seven score thousand of the Criminal Class slain by one another’s angles attested the triumph of Order.
The battle, or rather slaughter, was brief. Under the skilled leadership of the Circles, almost every Woman’s attack was deadly, and many withdrew their weapons unharmed, ready for a second round of violence. But a second strike wasn't necessary; the disorderly Isosceles took care of themselves. Surprised, without a leader, attacked in front by unseen enemies, and finding their escape blocked by the Convicts behind them, they immediately—like they always do—lost all sense of composure and shouted “treachery.” This sealed their fate. Every Isosceles now perceived a threat from everyone else. In half an hour, not a single one of that huge crowd was left alive; and the remains of seventy thousand members of the Criminal Class killed by each other’s angles proved the victory of Order.
The Circles delayed not to push their victory to the uttermost. The Working Men they spared but decimated. The Militia of the Equilaterals was at once called out; and every Triangle suspected of Irregularity on reasonable grounds, was destroyed by Court Martial, without the formality of exact measurement by the Social Board. The homes of the Military and Artisan classes were inspected in a course of visitations extending through upwards of a year; and during that period every town, village, and hamlet was systematically purged of that excess of the lower orders which had been brought about by the neglect to pay the Tribute of Criminals to the Schools and University, and by the violation of the other natural Laws of the Constitution of Flatland. Thus the balance of classes was again restored.
The Circles wasted no time in pushing their victory to the max. They spared the Working Men but still significantly reduced their numbers. The Militia of the Equilaterals was immediately called out, and any Triangle suspected of Irregularity on reasonable grounds was eliminated by Court Martial, without the need for precise measurement by the Social Board. The homes of the Military and Artisan classes were inspected during a series of visits that lasted over a year; throughout that time, every town, village, and hamlet was systematically cleansed of the excess lower classes that had resulted from the failure to pay the Tribute of Criminals to the Schools and University, as well as from the violation of the other natural Laws of the Constitution of Flatland. This way, the balance of classes was restored once more.
Needless to say that henceforth the use of Colour was abolished, and its possession prohibited. Even the utterance of any word denoting Colour, except by the Circles or by qualified scientific teachers, was punished by a severe penalty. Only at our University in some of the very highest and most esoteric classes—which I myself have never been privileged to attend—it is understood that the sparing use of Colour is still sanctioned for the purpose of illustrating some of the deeper problems of mathematics. But of this I can only speak from hearsay.
Needless to say, from now on the use of Color was banned, and owning it was prohibited. Even saying any word that referred to Color, except by the Circles or qualified science teachers, was punished with a harsh penalty. Only at our University, in a few of the highest and most specialized classes—which I have never had the chance to attend—it’s understood that limited use of Color is still allowed to illustrate some of the more complex problems in mathematics. But I can only speak about this from what I've heard.
Elsewhere in Flatland, Colour is now non-existent. The art of making it is known to only one living person, the Chief Circle for the time being; and by him it is handed down on his death-bed to none but his Successor. One manufactory alone produces it; and, lest the secret should be betrayed, the Workmen are annually consumed, and fresh ones introduced. So great is the terror with which even now our Aristocracy looks back to the far-distant days of the agitation for the Universal Colour Bill.
Elsewhere in Flatland, Color no longer exists. Only one living person, the Chief Circle for now, knows how to create it; and he passes this knowledge on his deathbed only to his Successor. Only one factory produces it, and to keep the secret safe, the Workers are killed each year and replaced with new ones. The fear of our Aristocracy when they remember the long-ago days of the fight for the Universal Color Bill is still very strong.
§ 11.—Concerning our Priests.
It is high time that I should pass from these brief and discursive notes about things in Flatland to the central event of this book, my initiation into the mysteries of Space. That is my subject; all that has gone before is merely preface.
It’s about time I moved on from these short and random notes about life in Flatland to the main event of this book: my introduction to the mysteries of Space. That is my focus; everything else was just an introduction.
For this reason I must omit many matters of which the explanation would not, I flatter myself, be without interest for my Readers: as for example, our method of propelling and stopping ourselves, although destitute of feet; the means by which we give fixity to structures of wood, stone, or brick, although of course we have no hands, nor can we lay foundations as you can, nor avail ourselves of the lateral pressure of the earth; the manner in which the rain originates in the intervals between our various zones, so that the northern regions do not intercept the moisture from falling on the southern; the nature of our hills and mines, our trees and vegetables, our seasons and harvests; our Alphabet, and method of writing, adapted to our linear tablets; these and a hundred other details of our physical existence I must pass over, nor do I mention them now except to indicate to my readers that their omission proceeds not from forgetfulness on the part of the Author, but from his regard for the time of the Reader.
For this reason, I need to leave out many topics that I believe would be interesting to my readers. For instance, our way of moving and stopping ourselves, even though we don't have feet; how we stabilize buildings made of wood, stone, or brick, even though we obviously don’t have hands, can't lay foundations like you do, and can’t use the earth's lateral pressure; how rain forms in the gaps between our various zones, so that the northern areas don’t block moisture from reaching the southern ones; the characteristics of our hills and mines, our trees and crops, our seasons and harvests; our alphabet and writing system, designed for our linear tablets. I have to skip over these and many other details of our physical existence, and I only bring them up now to show my readers that their omission isn't due to forgetfulness on my part, but rather out of consideration for the reader's time.
Yet before I proceed to my legitimate subject some few final remarks will no doubt be expected by my Readers upon those pillars and mainstays of the Constitution of Flatland, the controllers of our conduct and shapers of our destiny, the objects of universal homage and almost of adoration: need I say that I mean our Circles or Priests?
Yet before I move on to my main topic, my readers will surely expect a few final comments on the pillars and foundations of the Constitution of Flatland, the ones who guide our behavior and shape our future, the objects of universal respect and near-worship: need I mention that I mean our Circles, or Priests?
When I call them Priests, let me not be understood as meaning no more than the term denotes with you. With us, our Priests are Administrators of all Business, Art, and Science; Directors of Trade, Commerce, Generalship, Architecture, Engineering, Education, Statesmanship, Legislature, Morality, Theology; doing nothing themselves, they are the Causes of everything, worth doing, that is done by others.
When I refer to them as Priests, I hope it's clear that I mean more than what that term represents for you. For us, our Priests are the Managers of all Business, Art, and Science; Leaders in Trade, Commerce, Military Strategy, Architecture, Engineering, Education, Politics, Legislation, Morality, and Theology; without doing anything themselves, they are the Driving Forces behind everything meaningful that others accomplish.
Although popularly every one called a Circle is deemed a Circle, yet among the better educated Classes it is known that no Circle is really a Circle, but only a Polygon with a very large number of very small sides. In proportion to the number of the sides the Polygon approximates to a Circle; and, when the number is very great, say for example three or four hundred, it is extremely difficult for the most delicate touch to feel any polygonal angles. Let me say rather, it would be difficult: for, as I have shown above, Recognition by Feeling is unknown among the highest society, and to feel a Circle would be considered a most audacious insult. This habit of abstention from Feeling in the best society enables a Circle the more easily to sustain the veil of mystery in which, from his earliest years, he is wont to enwrap the exact nature of his Perimeter or Circumference. Three feet being the average Perimeter it follows that, in a Polygon of three hundred sides, each side will be no more than the hundredth part of a foot in length, or little more than the tenth part of an inch; and in a Polygon of six or seven hundred sides the sides are little larger than the diameter of a Spaceland pin-head. It is always assumed, by courtesy, that the Chief Circle for the time being has ten thousand sides.
Although everyone commonly refers to a Circle as a Circle, those who are more educated know that no Circle is actually a Circle, but rather a Polygon with a very large number of very small sides. As the number of sides increases, the Polygon gets closer to resembling a Circle; and when the number is extremely high, say three or four hundred, it's really hard even for the most sensitive touch to detect any polygonal angles. Let me put it this way: it *would* be difficult. As I mentioned earlier, recognizing by touch is not practiced among the upper class, and to *feel* a Circle would be seen as a serious insult. This avoidance of touch in high society allows a Circle to maintain the mystery surrounding the true nature of his Perimeter or Circumference, which he has kept hidden since he was young. With an average Perimeter of three feet, in a Polygon with three hundred sides, each side would be no longer than one hundredth of a foot, or just over a tenth of an inch; in a Polygon with six or seven hundred sides, the sides are only slightly larger than the diameter of a Spaceland pinhead. It is always politely assumed that the Chief Circle at any given time has ten thousand sides.
The ascent of the posterity of the Circles in the social scale is not restricted, as it is among the lower Regular classes, by the Law of Nature which limits the increase of sides to one in each generation. If it were so, the number of sides in a Circle would be a mere question of pedigree and arithmetic, and the four hundred and ninety-seventh descendant of an Equilateral Triangle would necessarily be a Polygon with five hundred sides. But this is not the case. Nature’s Law prescribes two antagonistic decrees affecting Circular propagation; first, that as the race climbs higher in the scale of development, so development shall proceed at an accelerated pace; second, that in the same proportion, the race shall become less fertile. Consequently in the home of a Polygon of four or five hundred sides it is rare to find a son; more than one is never seen. On the other hand the son of a five-hundred-sided Polygon has been known to possess five hundred and fifty, or even six hundred sides.
The rise of the descendants of the Circles in social status isn't limited, like it is for the lower Regular classes, by the Law of Nature that restricts the increase of sides to one in each generation. If that were the case, the number of sides in a Circle would just be a matter of ancestry and math, and the four hundred and ninety-seventh descendant of an Equilateral Triangle would automatically be a Polygon with five hundred sides. But that's not how it works. Nature’s Law has two opposing rules regarding Circular reproduction; first, that as the species advances higher in development, this development will happen more quickly; second, that in the same proportion, the species will become less fertile. As a result, in the home of a Polygon with four or five hundred sides, it's uncommon to find a son; more than one is never seen. On the flip side, the son of a five-hundred-sided Polygon has been known to have five hundred and fifty or even six hundred sides.
Art also steps in to help the process of the higher Evolution. Our physicians have discovered that the small and tender sides of an infant Polygon of the higher class can be fractured, and his whole frame re-set, with such exactness that a Polygon of two or three hundred sides sometimes—by no means always, for the process is attended with serious risk—but sometimes overleaps two or three hundred generations, and as it were doubles at a stroke, the number of his progenitors and the nobility of his descent.
Art also plays a role in aiding the process of higher evolution. Our doctors have found that the delicate and sensitive parts of an infant Polygon of a higher class can be broken, and its entire structure can be reset with such precision that a Polygon with two or three hundred sides sometimes—though not always, as this process carries considerable risk—but sometimes skips over two or three hundred generations, effectively doubling the number of its ancestors and enhancing the nobility of its lineage.
Many a promising child is sacrificed in this way. Scarcely one out of ten survives. Yet so strong is the parental ambition among those Polygons who are, as it were, on the fringe of the Circular class, that it is very rare to find a Nobleman of that position in society, who has neglected to place his first-born son in the Circular Neo-Therapeutic Gymnasium before he has attained the age of a month.
Many promising children end up being sacrificed this way. Hardly one in ten makes it through. Yet, the parental ambition among those Polygons who are, so to speak, on the edge of the Circular class is so strong that it's very rare to come across a Nobleman in that social position who hasn't enrolled his firstborn son in the Circular Neo-Therapeutic Gymnasium before he turns a month old.
One year determines success or failure. At the end of that time the child has, in all probability, added one more to the tombstones that crowd the Neo-Therapeutic Cemetery; but on rare occasions a glad procession bears back the little one to his exultant parents, no longer a Polygon, but a Circle, at least by courtesy: and a single instance of so blessed a result induces multitudes of Polygonal parents to submit to similar domestic sacrifices, which have a dissimilar issue.
One year decides if it's a win or a loss. By the end of that time, the child has likely become just another name on the tombstones in the Neo-Therapeutic Cemetery; but sometimes, a joyful procession returns the little one to their happy parents, who now see them not as a Polygon, but as a Circle, at least in name. And just one case of such a fortunate outcome leads many Polygonal parents to make similar sacrifices at home, which often turn out differently.
§ 12.—Of the Doctrine of our Priests.
As to the doctrine of the Circles it may briefly be summed up in a single maxim, “Attend to your Configuration.” Whether political, ecclesiastical, or moral, all their teaching has for its object the improvement of individual and collective Configuration—with special reference of course to the Configuration of the Circles, to which all other objects are subordinated.
As for the doctrine of the Circles, it can be summed up in one saying: “Pay attention to your Configuration.” Whether it's political, religious, or ethical, all their teachings aim to improve both individual and collective Configuration, with a particular focus on the Configuration of the Circles, which takes precedence over everything else.
It is the merit of the Circles that they have effectually suppressed those ancient heresies which led men to waste energy and sympathy in the vain belief that conduct depends upon will, effort, training, encouragement, praise, or anything else but Configuration. It was Pantocyclus—the illustrious Circle mentioned above, as the queller of the Colour Revolt—who first convinced mankind that Configuration makes the man; that if, for example, you are born an Isosceles with two uneven sides, you will assuredly go wrong unless you have them made even—for which purpose you must go to the Isosceles Hospital; similarly, if you are a Triangle, or Square, or even a Polygon, born with any Irregularity, you must be taken to one of the Regular Hospitals to have your disease cured; otherwise you will end your days in the State Prison or by the angle of the State Executioner.
It is the achievement of the Circles that they have effectively eliminated those old heresies that caused people to waste their energy and compassion on the misguided belief that behavior is based on will, effort, training, encouragement, praise, or anything else besides Configuration. It was Pantocyclus—the notable Circle mentioned earlier as the suppressor of the Colour Revolt—who first convinced humanity that Configuration shapes a person; that if, for instance, you are born an Isosceles with two uneven sides, you will definitely go astray unless you have them made even—for which you need to go to the Isosceles Hospital; similarly, if you are a Triangle, Square, or even a Polygon, born with any Irregularity, you must be taken to one of the Regular Hospitals to have your condition treated; otherwise, you will end your life in the State Prison or by the hand of the State Executioner.
All faults or defects, from the slightest misconduct to the most flagitious crime, Pantocyclus attributed to some deviation from perfect Regularity in the bodily figure, caused perhaps (if not congenital) by some collision in a crowd; by neglect to take exercise, or by taking too much of it; or even by a sudden change of temperature, resulting in a shrinkage or expansion in some too susceptible part of the frame. Therefore, concluded that illustrious Philosopher, neither good conduct nor bad conduct is a fit subject, in any sober estimation, for either praise or blame. For why should you praise, for example, the integrity of a Square who faithfully defends the interests of his client, when you ought in reality rather to admire the exact precision of his Rectangles? Or again, why blame a lying, thievish Isosceles when you ought rather to deplore the incurable inequality of his sides?
All faults or defects, from minor misbehavior to serious crimes, Pantocyclus linked to some disruption in perfect Regularity of the body, possibly caused (if not innate) by some jostling in a crowd; by not exercising enough, or by exercising too much; or even by a sudden change in temperature that leads to shrinking or expanding in some overly sensitive part of the body. Therefore, that distinguished Philosopher concluded that neither good behavior nor bad behavior is a suitable topic, in any rational assessment, for praise or blame. For why should you praise, for example, the integrity of a Square who faithfully represents the interests of his client, when you should actually admire the precise angles of his Rectangles? Or again, why criticize a lying, thieving Isosceles when you should rather mourn the unfixable imbalance of his sides?
Theoretically, this doctrine is unquestionable; but it has practical drawbacks. In dealing with an Isosceles, if a rascal pleads that he cannot help stealing because of his unevenness, you reply that for that very reason, because he cannot help being a nuisance to his neighbours, you, the Magistrate, cannot help sentencing him to be consumed—and there’s an end of the matter. But in little domestic difficulties, where the penalty of consumption, or death, is out of the question, this theory of Configuration sometimes comes in awkwardly; and I must confess that occasionally when one of my own Hexagonal Grandsons pleads as an excuse for his disobedience that a sudden change of the temperature has been too much for his Perimeter, and that I ought to lay the blame not on him but on his Configuration, which can only be strengthened by abundance of the choicest sweetmeats, I neither see my way logically to reject, nor practically to accept, his conclusions.
Theoretically, this doctrine is rock solid; but it has practical downsides. When dealing with an Isosceles, if a troublemaker claims he can't help but steal because of his unevenness, you respond that because of that very reason, since he can't help being a nuisance to his neighbors, you, as the Magistrate, can't help but sentence him to be consumed—and that's the end of it. However, in minor domestic issues, where the punishment of being consumed or death isn't an option, this theory of Configuration can be a bit tricky; and I must admit that sometimes when one of my own Hexagonal Grandsons tries to excuse his disobedience by saying that a sudden temperature change has messed with his Perimeter and that I should blame his Configuration instead of him—which can only be improved with plenty of the finest sweets—I find it hard to logically reject, yet practically accept, his reasoning.
For my own part, I find it best to assume that a good sound scolding or castigation has some latent and strengthening influence on my Grandson’s Configuration; though I own that I have no grounds for thinking so. At all events I am not alone in my way of extricating myself from this dilemma; for I find that many of the highest Circles, sitting as Judges in Law courts, use praise and blame towards Regular and Irregular Figures; and in their homes I know by experience that, when scolding their children, they speak about “right” or “wrong” as vehemently and passionately as if they believed that these names represented real existences, and that a human Figure is really capable of choosing between them.
For my part, I think it’s best to assume that a good scolding or punishment has some hidden and positive impact on my grandson's character, although I admit I have no evidence to support that. In any case, I’m not alone in how I try to get out of this dilemma; I see that many high-ranking people, acting as judges in courts, use praise and criticism regarding both regular and irregular behavior. I know from experience that in their homes, when they scold their kids, they talk about “right” or “wrong” with the same intensity and passion as if they truly believed those terms represented real things and that a person can genuinely choose between them.
Consistently carrying out their policy of making Configuration the leading idea in every mind, the Circles reverse the nature of that Commandment which in Spaceland regulates the relations between parents and children. With you, children are taught to honour their parents; with us—next to the Circles, who are the chief object of universal homage—a man is taught to honour his Grandson, if he has one; or, if not, his Son. By “honour,” however, is by no means meant “indulgence,” but a reverent regard for their highest interests: and the Circles teach that the duty of fathers is to subordinate their own interests to those of posterity, thereby advancing the welfare of the whole State as well as that of their own immediate descendants.
Consistently implementing their policy of making Configuration the central idea in everyone's mind, the Circles flip the concept of that Commandment which in Spaceland governs the relationships between parents and children. In your world, children learn to respect their parents; in ours—after the Circles, who are the primary focus of universal admiration—a man learns to honor his Grandson, if he has one; or, if not, his Son. However, by “honor,” we don't mean “indulgence,” but rather a respectful consideration for their highest interests: and the Circles teach that the responsibility of fathers is to prioritize the interests of future generations over their own, thus promoting the well-being of both the entire state and their immediate descendants.
The weak point in the system of the Circles—if a humble Square may venture to speak of anything Circular as containing any element of weakness—appears to me to be found in their relations with Women.
The weak point in the system of the Circles—if a humble Square may dare to suggest that anything Circular has any flaw—seems to me to lie in their relationships with Women.
As it is of the utmost importance for Society that Irregular births should be discouraged, it follows that no Woman who has any Irregularities in her ancestry is a fit partner for one who desires that his posterity should rise by regular degrees in the social scale.
As it's crucial for society to discourage irregular births, it follows that no woman with any irregularities in her family history is a suitable partner for someone who wants their descendants to advance steadily in social status.
Now the Irregularity of a Male is a matter of measurement; but as all Women are straight, and therefore visibly Regular so to speak, one has to devise some other means of ascertaining what I may call their invisible Irregularity, that is to say their potential Irregularities as regards possible offspring. This is effected by carefully-kept pedigrees, which are preserved and supervised by the State; and without a certified pedigree no Woman is allowed to marry.
Now, the irregularity of a man is something you can measure; but since all women are straight and therefore visibly regular, you need to find another way to determine what I might call their invisible irregularity, meaning their potential irregularities concerning possible offspring. This is accomplished through carefully maintained family trees, which are kept and monitored by the government; and without a certified family tree, no woman is allowed to marry.
Now it might have been supposed that a Circle—proud of his ancestry and regardful for a posterity which might possibly issue hereafter in a Chief Circle—would be more careful than any other to choose a wife who had no blot on her escutcheon. But it is not so. The care in choosing a Regular wife appears to diminish as one rises in the social scale. Nothing would induce an aspiring Isosceles, who had hopes of generating an Equilateral Son, to take a wife who reckoned a single Irregularity among her Ancestors; a Square or Pentagon, who is confident that his family is steadily on the rise, does not enquire above the five-hundredth generation; a Hexagon or Dodecahedron is even more careless of the wife’s pedigree; but a Circle has been known deliberately to take a wife who has had an Irregular Great-Grandfather, and all because of some slight superiority of lustre, or because of the charms of a low voice—which, with us, even more than with you, is thought “an excellent thing in Woman.”
Now, you might think that a Circle—proud of its lineage and mindful of a future that might someday produce a Chief Circle—would be more careful than anyone else in choosing a wife with a spotless background. But that's not the case. The attention paid to picking a Regular wife seems to decrease as one moves up the social ladder. Nothing would make an ambitious Isosceles, who dreams of having an Equilateral Son, marry a wife with even one Irregularity in her family tree; a Square or Pentagon, confident that their family is on the rise, doesn't look further than the five-hundredth generation; a Hexagon or Dodecahedron is even less concerned about their wife's ancestry; yet a Circle has been known to intentionally marry a wife with an Irregular Great-Grandfather, all for some minor flair or the appeal of a lovely low voice—which, for us, even more than for you, is considered “an excellent quality in a woman.”
Such ill-judged marriages are, as might be expected, barren, if they do not result in positive Irregularity or in diminution of sides; but none of these evils have hitherto proved sufficiently deterrent. The loss of a few sides in a highly-developed Polygon is not easily noticed, and is sometimes compensated by a successful operation in the Neo-Therapeutic Gymnasium, as I have described above; and the Circles are too much disposed to acquiesce in infecundity as a Law of the superior development. Yet, if this evil be not arrested, the gradual diminution of the Circular class may soon become more rapid, and the time may be not far distant when, the race being no longer able to produce a Chief Circle, the Constitution of Flatland must fall.
Such poorly thought-out marriages usually end up being unproductive, or at the very least, decrease the overall quality; however, none of these issues have been enough to discourage them so far. The loss of a few sides in a highly developed polygon isn’t easily noticeable and can sometimes be offset by a successful treatment at the Neo-Therapeutic Gymnasium, as I mentioned earlier. Meanwhile, the Circles tend to accept infertility as a natural part of superior development. But if this problem isn’t addressed, the slow decline of the Circular class could speed up, and it won't be long before the race is unable to produce a Chief Circle, leading to the collapse of the Constitution of Flatland.
One other word of warning suggests itself to me, though I cannot so easily mention a remedy; and this also refers to our relations with Women. About three hundred years ago, it was decreed by the Chief Circle that, since women are deficient in Reason but abundant in Emotion, they ought no longer to be treated as rational, nor receive any mental education. The consequence was that they were no longer taught to read, nor even to master Arithmetic enough to enable them to count the angles of their husband or children; and hence they sensibly declined during each generation in intellectual power. And this system of female non-education or quietism still prevails.
One more word of caution comes to mind, though I can't easily suggest a solution; this also relates to our interactions with women. About three hundred years ago, the Chief Circle decided that, since women lack reason but are full of emotion, they should no longer be treated as rational beings or receive any mental education. As a result, they were no longer taught to read or even to learn enough math to be able to count the ages of their husbands or children; consequently, they noticeably declined in intellectual ability with each generation. This system of not educating women or keeping them passive is still in place today.
My fear is that, with the best intentions, this policy has been carried so far as to react injuriously on the Male Sex.
My worry is that, even though this policy was created with good intentions, it has gone too far and is negatively affecting men.
For the consequence is that, as things now are, we Males have to lead a kind of bi-lingual, and I may almost say bi-mental existence. With the Women, we speak of “love,” “duty,” “right,” “wrong,” “pity,” “hope,” and other irrational and emotional conceptions, which have no existence, and the fiction of which has no object except to control feminine exuberances; but among ourselves, and in our books, we have an entirely different vocabulary and I may almost say, idiom. “Love” then becomes “the anticipation of benefits;” “duty” becomes “necessity” or “fitness;” and other words are correspondingly transmuted. Moreover, among Women, we use language implying the utmost deference for their Sex; and they fully believe that the Chief Circle Himself is not more devoutly adored by us than they are: but behind their backs they are both regarded and spoken of—by all except the very young—as being little better than “mindless organisms.”
For the result is that, as things stand now, we men have to live a sort of bilingual, and I might say, dual-minded life. With women, we talk about “love,” “duty,” “right,” “wrong,” “pity,” “hope,” and other emotional concepts that don't really exist, and the only purpose of these ideas is to manage feminine enthusiasm; but among ourselves, and in our writings, we have a completely different vocabulary and, I could almost say, lingo. “Love” turns into “the expectation of benefits;” “duty” becomes “necessity” or “suitability;” and other terms are similarly transformed. Additionally, in our conversations with women, we use language that shows the utmost respect for their gender; and they genuinely believe that the Chief Circle Himself is not more reverently admired by us than they are: yet behind their backs, all except the very young view and discuss them as being little more than “mindless organisms.”
Our Theology also in the Women’s chambers is entirely different from our Theology elsewhere.
Our theology in the women’s chambers is completely different from our theology in other places.
Now my humble fear is that this double training, in language as well as in thought, imposes somewhat too heavy a burden upon the young, especially when, at the age of three years old, they are taken from the maternal care and taught to unlearn the old language—except for the purpose of repeating it in the presence of their Mothers and Nurses—and to learn the vocabulary and idiom of science. Already methinks I discern a weakness in the grasp of mathematical truth at the present time as compared with the more robust intellect of our ancestors three hundred years ago. I say nothing of the possible danger if a Woman should ever surreptitiously learn to read and convey to her Sex the result of her perusal of a single popular volume; nor of the possibility that the indiscretion or disobedience of some infant Male might reveal to a Mother the secrets of the logical dialect. On the simple ground of the enfeebling of the Male intellect, I rest this humble appeal to the highest Authorities to reconsider the regulations of Female Education.
Now my modest concern is that this dual approach, in language as well as in thinking, places quite a heavy load on the young, especially when, at just three years old, they are taken away from their mothers' care and taught to forget their old language—except for the sake of repeating it in front of their mothers and caregivers—and to learn the vocabulary and style of science. I already sense a decline in the understanding of mathematical truths these days compared to the stronger intellects of our ancestors three hundred years ago. I won’t even mention the potential risk if a woman were to secretly learn to read and share with her peers what she read in a popular book; nor the chance that the indiscretion or disobedience of some young boy might reveal to a mother the secrets of logical reasoning. On the simple basis of the weakening of male intellect, I submit this humble request to the highest authorities to reconsider the rules of female education.
Part II
OTHER WORLDS
“O brave new worlds,
“O brave new worlds,”
That have such people in them!”
That have people like that in them!
PART II
OTHER LANDS
§ 13.—How I had a Vision of Lineland.
It was the last day but one of the 1999th year of our era, and the first day of the Long Vacation. Having amused myself till a late hour with my favourite recreation of Geometry, I had retired to rest with an unsolved problem in my mind. In the night I had a dream.
It was the day before the last of the year 1999, and the first day of the Long Vacation. After spending a late night enjoying my favorite hobby, Geometry, I went to bed with an unsolved problem on my mind. During the night, I had a dream.
I saw before me a vast multitude of small Straight Lines (which I naturally assumed to be Women) interspersed with other Beings still smaller and of the nature of lustrous Points—all moving to and fro in one and the same Straight Line, and, as nearly as I could judge, with the same velocity.
I saw in front of me a huge crowd of small Straight Lines (which I naturally thought were Women) mixed in with other beings that were even smaller and like shiny Points—all moving back and forth along the same Straight Line, and, as far as I could tell, at the same speed.

A noise of confused, multitudinous chirping or twittering issued from them at intervals as long as they were moving; but sometimes they ceased from motion, and then all was silence.
A noise of jumbled, numerous chirping or twittering came from them at intervals while they were moving; but sometimes they stopped, and then everything fell silent.
Approaching one of the largest of what I thought to be Women, I accosted her, but received no answer. A second and third appeal on my part were equally ineffectual. Losing patience at what appeared to me intolerable rudeness, I brought my mouth into a position full in front of her mouth so as to intercept her motion, and loudly repeated my question, “Woman, what signifies this concourse, and this strange and confused chirping, and this monotonous motion to and fro in one and the same Straight Line?”
Approaching one of the largest figures I thought was a woman, I spoke to her, but got no response. A second and third attempt on my part met with the same silence. Growing frustrated at what seemed to me an unbearable rudeness, I positioned my mouth directly in front of hers to block her movement and loudly repeated my question, “Woman, what does this crowd mean, and this strange and confusing noise, and this endless back-and-forth in a straight line?”
“I am no Woman,” replied the small Line; “I am the Monarch of the world. But thou, whence intrudest thou into my realm of Lineland?” Receiving this abrupt reply, I begged pardon if I had in any way startled or molested his Royal Highness; and describing myself as a stranger I besought the King to give me some account of his dominions. But I had the greatest possible difficulty in obtaining any information on points that really interested me; for the Monarch could not refrain from constantly assuming that whatever was familiar to him must also be known to me and that I was simulating ignorance in jest. However, by persevering questions I elicited the following facts:
“I am no woman,” replied the small Line; “I am the ruler of the world. But you, why have you entered my realm of Lineland?” After receiving this blunt response, I apologized if I had startled or disturbed his Royal Highness in any way. Describing myself as a stranger, I asked the King to tell me about his kingdom. However, I had a hard time getting any information on the things that truly interested me, as the Monarch kept assuming that whatever was familiar to him must also be known to me and that I was pretending to be ignorant for fun. Still, through persistent questioning, I managed to uncover the following facts:
It seemed that this poor ignorant Monarch—as he called himself—was persuaded that the Straight Line which he called his Kingdom, and in which he passed his existence, constituted the whole of the world, and indeed the whole of Space. Not being able either to move or to see, save in his Straight Line, he had no conception of anything out of it. Though he had heard my voice when I first addressed him, the sounds had come to him in a manner so contrary to his experience that he had made no answer, “seeing no man,” as he expressed it, “and hearing a voice as it were from my own intestines.” Until the moment when I placed my mouth in his World, he had neither seen me, nor heard anything except confused sounds beating against what I called his side, but what he called his inside or stomach; nor had he even now the least conception of the region from which I had come. Outside his World, or Line, all was a blank to him; nay, not even a blank, for a blank implies Space; say, rather, all was non-existent.
It seemed that this poor, clueless Monarch—as he referred to himself—was convinced that the Straight Line he called his Kingdom, where he spent his life, was the entirety of the world and, in fact, all of Space. Unable to move or see beyond his Straight Line, he had no idea about anything outside of it. Although he had heard my voice when I first spoke to him, the sounds reached him in a way that was so foreign to his experience that he did not respond, “seeing no man,” as he put it, “and hearing a voice as if it were coming from my own insides.” Until the moment I placed my mouth into his World, he had neither seen me nor heard anything except for confusing sounds hitting against what I referred to as his side, but which he called his inside or stomach; and even now, he didn’t have the slightest understanding of the area from which I had come. Outside of his World, or Line, everything was a blank to him; in fact, not even a blank, as a blank suggests Space; rather, all was non-existent.
His subjects—of whom the small Lines were Men and the Points Women—were all alike confined in motion and eye-sight to that single Straight Line, which was their World. It need scarcely be added that the whole of their horizon was limited to a Point; nor could any one ever see anything but a Point. Man, woman, child, thing—each was a Point to the eye of a Linelander. Only by the sound of the voice could sex or age be distinguished. Moreover, as each individual occupied the whole of the narrow path, so to speak, which constituted his Universe, and no one could move to the right or left to make way for passers by, it followed that no Linelander could ever pass another. Once neighbours, always neighbours. Neighbourhood with them was like marriage with us. Neighbours remained neighbours till death did them part.
His subjects—where the small Lines were Men and the Points were Women—were all confined in movement and sight to that single Straight Line, which was their World. It hardly needs to be said that their entire horizon was reduced to a Point; no one could ever see anything but a Point. Man, woman, child, thing—each was a Point to the eye of a Linelander. The only way to tell sex or age apart was by the sound of the voice. Furthermore, since each individual occupied the entire narrow path, so to speak, that made up his Universe, and no one could move to the right or left to let others pass, it meant that no Linelander could ever pass another. Once neighbors, always neighbors. For them, being neighbors was like being married for us. Neighbors remained neighbors until death did them part.
Such a life, with all vision limited to a Point, and all motion to a Straight Line, seemed to me inexpressibly dreary; and I was surprised to note the vivacity and cheerfulness of the King. Wondering whether it was possible, amid circumstances so unfavourable to domestic relations, to enjoy the pleasures of conjugal union, I hesitated for some time to question his Royal Highness on so delicate a subject; but at last I plunged into it by abruptly inquiring as to the health of his family. “My wives and children,” he replied, “are well and happy.”
Such a life, where everything is focused on just one point and all movement happens in a straight line, felt incredibly dull to me; I was taken aback by the King’s energy and happiness. I wondered if, despite such challenging conditions for family life, it was possible to find joy in marriage. After hesitating for a while to bring up such a sensitive topic, I finally dove in by asking about his family’s wellbeing. “My wives and children,” he replied, “are well and happy.”
Staggered at this answer—for in the immediate proximity of the Monarch (as I had noted in my dream before I entered Lineland) there were none but Men—I ventured to reply, “Pardon me, but I cannot imagine how your Royal Highness can at any time either see or approach their Majesties, when there are at least half a dozen intervening individuals, whom you can neither see through, nor pass by? Is it possible that in Lineland proximity is not necessary for marriage and for the generation of children?”
Stunned by this answer—because right next to the Monarch (as I had mentioned in my dream before entering Lineland) there were only Men—I took a chance and replied, “Excuse me, but I can't understand how your Royal Highness could ever see or reach their Majesties when there are at least six people blocking the way, whom you can't see through or get around? Is it possible that in Lineland you don't need to be close to get married and have children?”
“How can you ask so absurd a question?” replied the Monarch. “If it were indeed as you suggest, the Universe would soon be depopulated. No, no; neighbourhood is needless for the union of hearts; and the birth of children is too important a matter to have been allowed to depend upon such an accident as proximity. You cannot be ignorant of this. Yet since you are pleased to affect ignorance, I will instruct you as if you were the veriest baby in Lineland. Know, then, that marriages are consummated by means of the faculty of sound and the sense of hearing.
“How can you ask such a ridiculous question?” replied the Monarch. “If it were really as you say, the Universe would be empty in no time. No, no; being close by isn’t necessary for two hearts to unite, and the arrival of children is too significant to be left up to something as random as being nearby. You can't really not know this. But since you're pretending to be clueless, I’ll explain it to you as if you were the biggest baby in Lineland. So, know this: marriages are made possible through the ability to speak and the sense of hearing.”
“You are of course aware that every Man has two mouths or voices—as well as two eyes—a bass at one and a tenor at the other of his extremities. I should not mention this, but that I have been unable to distinguish your tenor in the course of our conversation.” I replied that I had but one voice, and that I had not been aware that His Royal Highness had two. “That confirms my impression,” said the King, “that you are not a Man, but a feminine Monstrosity with a bass voice and an utterly uneducated ear. But to continue.
“You know that everyone has two mouths or voices—just like they have two eyes—one in a lower range and one in a higher range. I wouldn’t bring this up, but I haven’t been able to hear your higher range during our conversation.” I replied that I only had one voice and didn’t realize that His Royal Highness had two. “That just proves my point,” said the King, “that you’re not a man, but a strange woman with a low voice and a completely unrefined ear. But anyway, let’s continue.”
“Nature herself having ordained that every Man should wed two wives——” “Why two?” asked I. “You carry your affected simplicity too far,” he cried. “How can there be a completely harmonious union without the combination of the Four in One, viz. the Bass and Tenor of the Man and the Soprano and Contralto of the two Women?” “But supposing,” said I, “that a man should prefer one wife or three?” “It is impossible,” he said; “it is as inconceivable as that two and one should make five, or that the human eye should see a Straight Line.” I would have interrupted him; but he proceeded as follows:
“Nature herself has decided that every man should have two wives——” “Why two?” I asked. “You’re taking your feigned simplicity too far,” he exclaimed. “How can there be a truly harmonious union without the combination of the Four in One, that is, the Bass and Tenor of the man and the Soprano and Contralto of the two women?” “But what if,” I said, “a man prefers one wife or even three?” “That’s impossible,” he replied; “it’s as unimaginable as two and one equaling five, or that the human eye can see a Straight Line.” I wanted to interrupt him, but he continued:
“Once in the middle of each week a Law of Nature compels us to move to and fro with a rhythmic motion of more than usual violence, which continues for the time you would take to count a hundred and one. In the midst of this choral dance, at the fifty-first pulsation, the inhabitants of the Universe pause in full career, and each individual sends forth his richest, fullest, sweetest strain. It is in this decisive moment that all our marriages are made. So exquisite is the adaptation of Bass to Treble, of Tenor to Contralto, that oftentimes the Loved Ones, though twenty thousand leagues away, recognise at once the responsive note of their destined Lover; and, penetrating the paltry obstacles of distance, Love unites the three. The marriage in that instant consummated results in a threefold Male and Female offspring which takes its place in Lineland.”
“Once in the middle of each week, a Law of Nature drives us to move back and forth with a rhythmic intensity that’s more than usual, lasting about the time it takes to count to a hundred and one. In the midst of this collective dance, at the fifty-first beat, the inhabitants of the Universe stop in full motion, and each one releases their richest, fullest, sweetest sound. It is in this crucial moment that all our marriages are formed. The harmony between Bass and Treble, and Tenor and Contralto, is so perfect that often the Loved Ones, even if they're twenty thousand leagues away, instantly recognize the matching tone of their destined Lover; and, overcoming the trivial barriers of distance, Love brings the three together. The marriage that is completed in that instant results in a threefold Male and Female offspring that takes its place in Lineland.”
“What! Always threefold?” said I. “Must one wife then always have twins?”
“What! Always threefold?” I said. “Does that mean one wife has to always have twins?”
“Bass-voiced Monstrosity! yes,” replied the King. “How else could the balance of the Sexes be maintained, if two girls were not born for every boy? Would you ignore the very Alphabet of Nature?” He ceased, speechless for fury; and some time elapsed before I could induce him to resume his narrative.
“Bass-voiced Monstrosity! Yes,” replied the King. “How else could the balance of the sexes be kept if two girls were born for every boy? Would you disregard the very basics of Nature?” He fell silent in his anger, and it took a while before I could get him to continue his story.
“You will not, of course, suppose that every bachelor among us finds his mates at the first wooing in this universal Marriage Chorus. On the contrary, the process is by most of us many times repeated. Few are the hearts whose happy lot it is at once to recognise in each other’s voices the partner intended for them by Providence, and to fly into a reciprocal and perfectly harmonious embrace. With most of us the courtship is of long duration. The Wooer’s voices may perhaps accord with one of the future wives, but not with both; or not, at first, with either; or the Soprano and Contralto may not quite harmonise. In such cases Nature has provided that every weekly Chorus shall bring the three Lovers into closer harmony. Each trial of voice, each fresh discovery of discord, almost imperceptibly induces the less perfect to modify his or her vocal utterance so as to approximate to the more perfect. And after many trials and many approximations, the result is at last achieved. There comes a day at last, when, while the wonted Marriage Chorus goes forth from universal Lineland, the three far-off Lovers suddenly find themselves in exact harmony, and, before they are aware, the wedded Triplet is rapt vocally into a duplicate embrace; and Nature rejoices over one more marriage and over three more births.”
“You wouldn’t think that every bachelor among us finds his match on the first try in this universal Marriage Chorus. On the contrary, most of us go through the process many times. Few are the hearts that immediately recognize each other's voices as the partners that fate has intended for them and then fly into a perfect, harmonious embrace. For most of us, courtship lasts a long time. The suitor's voice might match one of the future brides, but not both; or not, at first, with either; or the Soprano and Contralto may not quite blend. In these cases, Nature ensures that each weekly Chorus brings the three Lovers into closer harmony. Each attempt at singing, each new discovery of discord, almost imperceptibly encourages the less perfect to adjust their vocal expression to get closer to the more perfect. After many trials and adjustments, the moment finally arrives. There comes a day when, while the familiar Marriage Chorus resonates throughout universal Lineland, the three distant Lovers suddenly find themselves in perfect harmony, and, before they realize it, the wedded Triplet is rapturously drawn into a duplicate embrace; and Nature celebrates one more marriage and three more births.”
§ 14.—How I vainly tried to explain the nature of Flatland.
Thinking that it was time to bring down the Monarch from his raptures to the level of common sense, I determined to endeavour to open up to him some glimpses of the truth, that is to say of the nature of things in Flatland. So I began thus: “How does your Royal Highness distinguish the shapes and positions of his subjects? I for my part noticed by the sense of sight, before I entered your Kingdom, that some of your people are Lines and others Points, and that some of the Lines are larger——”
Thinking it was time to bring the Monarch back down to earth, I decided to try and share some insights about the reality of life in Flatland. So I started with, “How does your Royal Highness recognize the shapes and positions of your subjects? Before I entered your Kingdom, I noticed through sight that some of your people are Lines and others are Points, and that some of the Lines are larger—”
“You speak of an impossibility,” interrupted the King; “you must have seen a vision; for to detect the difference between a Line and a Point by the sense of sight is, as every one knows, in the nature of things, impossible; but it can be detected by the sense of hearing, and by the same means my shape can be exactly ascertained. Behold me—I am a Line, the longest in Lineland, over six inches of Space——” “Of Length,” I ventured to suggest. “Fool,” said he, “Space is Length. Interrupt me again, and I have done.”
“You’re talking about something impossible,” the King cut in. “You must have had a vision; because, as everyone knows, seeing the difference between a Line and a Point is, by nature, impossible. But you can tell the difference by hearing, and through that same method, you can identify my shape. Look at me—I am a Line, the longest in Lineland, over six inches of Space——” “Of Length,” I dared to suggest. “Fool,” he snapped, “Space is Length. Interrupt me again, and I’m done.”
I apologised; but he continued scornfully, “Since you are impervious to argument, you shall hear with your ears how by means of my two voices I reveal my shape to my Wives, who are at this moment six thousand miles seventy yards two feet eight inches away, the one to the North, the other to the South. Listen, I call to them.”
I apologized, but he continued mockingly, “Since you can't be convinced, you'll hear with your ears how I use my two voices to show my form to my Wives, who are right now six thousand miles, seventy yards, two feet, and eight inches away—one to the North and the other to the South. Listen, I'm calling to them.”
He chirruped, and then complacently continued: “My wives at this moment receiving the sound of one of my voices, closely followed by the other, and perceiving that the latter reaches them after an interval in which sound can traverse 6.457 inches, infer that one of my mouths is 6.457 inches further from them than the other, and accordingly know my shape to be 6.457 inches. But you will of course understand that my wives do not make this calculation every time they hear my two voices. They made it, once for all, before we were married. But they could make it at any time. And in the same way I can estimate the shape of any of my Male subjects by the sense of sound.”
He chirped and then confidently continued: “My wives are right now hearing one of my voices, quickly followed by the other, and noticing that the second one reaches them after a delay where sound travels 6.457 inches, they conclude that one of my mouths is 6.457 inches farther from them than the other, and therefore know my shape to be 6.457 inches. But, of course, you should understand that my wives don’t do this calculation every time they hear my two voices. They figured it out once before we got married. But they could calculate it anytime. In the same way, I can estimate the shape of any of my male subjects by using sound.”
“But how,” said I, “if a Man feigns a Woman’s voice with one of his two voices, or so disguises his Southern voice that it cannot be recognised as the echo of the Northern? May not such deceptions cause great inconvenience? And have you no means of checking frauds of this kind by commanding your neighbouring subjects to feel one another?” This of course was a very stupid question, for feeling could not have answered the purpose; but I asked with the view of irritating the Monarch, and I succeeded perfectly.
“But how,” I said, “if a man pretends to have a woman’s voice with one of his two voices, or disguises his Southern accent so well that it’s unrecognizable as the echo of the Northern one? Couldn’t such deceptions cause serious problems? And don’t you have any way to check for frauds like this by having your neighboring subjects touch each other?” This was, of course, a really dumb question, since touching wouldn’t have solved anything; but I asked it to annoy the Monarch, and I succeeded completely.
“What!” cried he in horror, “explain your meaning.” “Feel, touch, come into contact,” I replied. “If you mean by feeling,” said the King, “approaching so close as to leave no space between two individuals, know, Stranger, that this offence is punishable in my dominions by death. And the reason is obvious. The frail form of a Woman, being liable to be shattered by such an approximation, must be preserved by the State; but since Women cannot be distinguished by the sense of sight from Man, the Law ordains universally that neither Man nor Woman shall be approached so closely as to destroy the interval between the approximator and the approximated.
“What!” he exclaimed in shock, “explain what you mean.” “Feel, touch, come into contact,” I replied. “If by feeling,” the King said, “you mean getting so close that there's no space between two people, understand this, Stranger: that offense is punishable by death in my kingdom. And the reason is clear. The delicate body of a woman, being vulnerable to such closeness, must be protected by the State; since women cannot be distinguished from men by sight, the law mandates that neither men nor women should get so close as to eliminate the space between them.”
“And indeed what possible purpose would be served by this illegal and unnatural excess of approximation which you call touching, when all the ends of so brutal and coarse a process are attained at once more easily and more exactly by the sense of hearing. As to your suggested danger of deception, it is non-existent: for the Voice, being the essence of one’s Being, cannot be thus changed at will. But come, suppose that I had the power of passing through solid things, so that I could penetrate my subjects, one after another, even to the number of a billion, verifying the size and distance of each by the sense of feeling: how much time and energy would be wasted in this clumsy and inaccurate method! Whereas now, in one moment of audition, I take as it were the census and statistics, local, corporal, mental, and spiritual, of every living being in Lineland. Hark, only hark!”
“And really, what purpose does this illegal and unnatural excess of closeness you call touching serve, when all the objectives of such a brutal and crude process can be achieved much more easily and accurately through hearing? As for your concern about being deceived, that's not a real issue: the Voice, being the essence of one’s existence, cannot be changed at will. But let’s say I could pass through solid objects, able to engage with my subjects one after the other, even up to a billion, checking their size and distance through feeling: how much time and energy would be wasted in this awkward and inaccurate way! Whereas now, in a single moment of listening, I can effectively take a census and gather statistics—local, physical, mental, and spiritual—of every living being in Lineland. Just listen, only listen!”
So saying he paused and listened, as if in an ecstasy, to a sound which seemed to me no better than a tiny chirping from an innumerable multitude of lilliputian grasshoppers.
So saying, he paused and listened, as if in bliss, to a sound that struck me as nothing more than a tiny chirping from countless tiny grasshoppers.
“Truly,” replied I, “your sense of hearing serves you in good stead, and fills up many of your deficiencies. But permit me to point out that your life in Lineland must be deplorably dull. To see nothing but a Point! Not even to be able to Contemplate a Straight Line! Nay, not even to know what a Straight Line is! To see, yet to be cut off from those Linear prospects which are vouchsafed to us in Flatland! Better surely to have no sense of sight at all than to see so little! I grant you I have not your discriminative faculty of hearing; for the concert of all Lineland which gives you such intense pleasure, is to me no better than a multitudinous twittering or chirping. But at least I can discern, by sight, a Line from a Point. And let me prove it. Just before I came into your kingdom, I saw you dancing from left to right, and then from right to left, with seven Men and a Woman in your immediate proximity on the left, and eight Men and two Women on your right. Is not this correct?”
“Honestly,” I replied, “your sense of hearing really benefits you and makes up for many of your shortcomings. But let me tell you, your life in Lineland must be incredibly boring. To see nothing but a Point! You can’t even think about a Straight Line! You don’t even know what a Straight Line is! To see, yet be deprived of the Linear views that we can experience in Flatland! Surely, it’s better to be completely blind than to see so little! I admit I don’t have your keen sense of hearing; to me, the music of all Lineland that gives you such joy is just a chaotic mix of chirping. But at least I can tell a Line from a Point by sight. Let me show you. Right before I entered your kingdom, I saw you dancing from left to right, and then from right to left, with seven Men and a Woman close to your left, and eight Men and two Women on your right. Isn’t that correct?”
“It is correct,” said the King, “so far as the numbers and sexes are concerned, though I know not what you mean by ‘right’ and ‘left.’ But I deny that you saw these things. For how could you see the Line, that is to say the inside, of any Man? But you must have heard these things, and then dreamed that you saw them. And let me ask what you mean by those words ‘left’ and ‘right.’ I suppose it is your way of saying Northward and Southward.”
“It’s true,” said the King, “as far as the numbers and genders go, but I don’t understand what you mean by ‘right’ and ‘left.’ But I don’t believe you actually saw these things. How could you see the inside of any man? You must have heard about them and then dreamed you saw them. And let me ask what you mean by ‘left’ and ‘right.’ I assume you’re just saying North and South.”
“Not so,” replied I; “besides your motion of Northward and Southward, there is another motion which I call from right to left.”
“Not at all,” I replied. “Besides your movement north and south, there’s another movement that I refer to as from right to left.”
King. Exhibit to me, if you please, this motion from left to right.
King. Please show me this movement from left to right.
I. Nay, that I cannot do, unless you could step out of your Line altogether.
I. No, I can't do that, unless you could completely step out of your role.
King. Out of my Line? Do you mean out of the World? Out of Space?
King. Out of my line? Do you mean out of this world? Out of space?
I. Well, yes. Out of your World. Out of your Space. For your Space is not the true Space. True Space is a Plane; but your Space is only a Line.
I. Well, yes. Out of your World. Out of your Space. Because your Space is not the real Space. Real Space is a Plane; but your Space is just a Line.
King. If you cannot indicate this motion from left to right by yourself moving in it, then I beg you to describe it to me in words.
King. If you can’t show this motion from left to right by actually moving, then please describe it to me in words.
I. If you cannot tell your right side from my left, I fear that no words of mine can make my meaning clear to you. But surely you cannot be ignorant of so simple a distinction.
I. If you can't tell your right side from my left, I'm afraid no words from me can help make my point clear to you. But you can't possibly be unaware of such a simple difference.
King. I do not in the least understand you.
King. I don’t understand you at all.
I. Alas! How shall I make it clear? When you move straight on, does it not sometimes occur to you that you could move in some other way, turning your eye round so as to look in the direction towards which your side is now fronting? In other words, instead of always moving in the direction of one of your extremities, do you never feel a desire to move in the direction, so to speak, of your side?
I. Unfortunately! How can I explain this? When you're walking straight ahead, don't you sometimes think that you could walk in a different way, turning to look in the direction where your side is currently facing? In other words, instead of always going toward one of your ends, do you never feel a need to move in the direction, so to speak, of your side?
King. Never. And what do you mean? How can a man’s inside “front” in any direction? Or how can a man move in the direction of his inside?
King. Never. What do you mean? How can a man’s insides "face" any direction? Or how can a man move toward his insides?
I. Well then, since words cannot explain the matter, I will try deeds, and will move gradually out of Lineland in the direction which I desire to indicate to you.
I. Well then, since words can't explain this, I'll try actions, and I'll slowly make my way out of Lineland toward the direction I want to show you.
At the word I began to move my body out of Lineland. As long as any part of me remained in his dominion and in his view, the King kept exclaiming, “I see you, I see you still; you are not moving.” But when I had at last moved myself out of his Line, he cried in his shrillest voice, “She is vanished; she is dead.” “I am not dead,” replied I; “I am simply out of Lineland, that is to say, out of the Straight Line which you call Space, and in the true Space, where I can see things as they are. And at this moment I can see your Line, or side—or inside as you are pleased to call it; and I can also see the Men and Women on the North and South of you, whom I will now enumerate, describing their order, their size, and the interval between each.”
At the word, I started to move my body out of Lineland. As long as any part of me was still in his territory and in his sight, the King kept shouting, “I see you, I see you still; you are not moving.” But when I finally shifted myself out of his Line, he screeched in his highest voice, “She has vanished; she is dead.” “I am not dead,” I replied; “I am just out of Lineland, which means out of the Straight Line that you call Space, and into true Space, where I can see things as they really are. And right now, I can see your Line, or side—or inside, as you like to call it; and I can also see the Men and Women to the North and South of you, whom I will now list, describing their order, their size, and the distance between each.”

When I had done this at great length, I cried triumphantly, “Does this at last convince you?” And, with that, I once more entered Lineland, taking up the same position as before.
When I finally finished this long explanation, I exclaimed triumphantly, “Does this convince you at last?” With that, I once again entered Lineland, assuming the same position as before.
But the Monarch replied, “If you were a Man of sense—though, as you appear to have only one voice I have little doubt you are not a Man but a Woman—but, if you had a particle of sense, you would listen to reason. You ask me to believe that there is another Line besides that which my senses indicate, and another motion besides that of which I am daily conscious. I, in return, ask you to describe in words or indicate by motion that other Line of which you speak. Instead of moving, you merely exercise some magic art of vanishing and returning to sight; and instead of any lucid description of your new World, you simply tell me the numbers and sizes of some forty of my retinue, facts known to any child in my capital. Can anything be more irrational or audacious? Acknowledge your folly or depart from my dominions.”
But the Monarch replied, “If you were a sensible person—though since you seem to have only one voice, I suspect you might not be a man but a woman—if you actually had any sense, you would listen to reason. You want me to believe that there's another line apart from the one my senses show me, and another motion beyond what I experience every day. In return, I ask you to either describe that other line in words or show it through movement. Instead of doing that, you just use some kind of magic trick to disappear and reappear; and instead of providing a clear description of your new world, you only tell me the numbers and sizes of about forty of my attendants, which any child in my capital would know. Can anything be more unreasonable or bold? Admit your mistake or leave my realm.”
Furious at his perversity, and especially indignant that he professed to be ignorant of my Sex, I retorted in no measured terms, “Besotted Being! You think yourself the perfection of existence, while you are in reality the most imperfect and imbecile. You profess to see, whereas you can see nothing but a Point! You plume yourself on inferring the existence of a Straight Line; but I can see Straight Lines and infer the existence of Angles, Triangles, Squares, Pentagons, Hexagons, and even Circles. Why waste more words? suffice it that I am the completion of your incomplete self. You are a Line, but I am a Line of Lines, called in my country a Square: and even I, infinitely superior though I am to you, am of little account among the great Nobles of Flatland, whence I have come to visit you, in the hope of enlightening your ignorance.”
Furious at his stubbornness, and especially upset that he claimed to be unaware of my gender, I shot back without holding back, “Fool! You think you're the peak of existence, while you’re actually the most flawed and foolish. You say you can see, but you really only see a dot! You pride yourself on assuming there's a straight line; but I can see straight lines and recognize angles, triangles, squares, pentagons, hexagons, and even circles. Why say more? The point is, I am the completion of your incomplete self. You are a line, but I am a line of lines, known in my country as a square: and even I, though I am vastly superior to you, am of little significance among the high nobility of Flatland, from which I have come to visit you, hoping to enlighten your ignorance.”
Hearing these words the King advanced towards me with a menacing cry as if to pierce me through the diagonal; and in that same moment there arose from myriads of his subjects a multitudinous war-cry, increasing in vehemence till at last methought it rivalled the roar of an army of a hundred thousand Isosceles, and the artillery of a thousand Pentagons. Spell-bound and motionless I could neither speak nor move to avert the impending destruction; and still the noise grew louder, and the King came closer, when I awoke to find the breakfast-bell recalling me to the realities of Flatland.
Hearing these words, the King approached me with a threatening shout, as if to strike me down. At that moment, a massive battle cry erupted from countless subjects, growing louder until it seemed to rival the roar of an army of a hundred thousand Isosceles and the thunder of a thousand Pentagons. Frozen and unable to speak or move to escape the looming disaster, I could only listen as the noise became deafening and the King drew nearer, until I suddenly woke up to the breakfast bell bringing me back to the reality of Flatland.
§ 15.—Concerning a Stranger from Spaceland.
From dreams I proceed to facts.
From dreams, I move on to reality.
It was the last day of the 1999th year of our era. The pattering of the rain had long ago announced nightfall; and I was sitting[3] in the company of my wife, musing on the events of the past and the prospects of the coming year, the coming century, the coming Millennium.
It was the last day of the year 1999. The sound of the rain had already signaled the arrival of night; and I was sitting[3] with my wife, reflecting on the events of the past and the possibilities of the upcoming year, the upcoming century, the upcoming Millennium.
My four Sons and two orphan Grandchildren had retired to their several apartments; and my Wife alone remained with me to see the old Millennium out and the new one in.
My four sons and two orphan grandchildren had gone to their separate rooms, and my wife stayed with me to welcome the end of the old millennium and the start of the new one.
I was rapt in thought, pondering in my mind some words that had casually issued from the mouth of my youngest Grandson, a most promising young Hexagon of unusual brilliancy and perfect angularity. His uncles and I had been giving him his usual practical lesson in Sight Recognition, turning ourselves upon our centres, now rapidly, now more slowly, and questioning him as to our positions; and his answers had been so satisfactory that I had been induced to reward him by giving him a few hints on Arithmetic, as applied to Geometry.
I was deep in thought, reflecting on something my youngest grandson casually said. He's a promising young Hexagon, full of unusual brilliance and perfect angles. His uncles and I had been giving him his usual hands-on lesson in Sight Recognition, spinning around quickly and slowly while asking him about our positions. His answers had been so impressive that I decided to reward him with a few tips on Arithmetic related to Geometry.
Taking nine Squares, each an inch every way, I had put them together so as to make one large Square, with a side of three inches, and I had hence proved to my little Grandson that—though it was impossible for us to see the inside of the Square—yet we might ascertain the number of square inches in a Square by simply squaring the number of inches in the side: “and thus,” said I, “we know that 3², or 9, represents the number of square inches in a Square whose side is 3 inches long.”
Taking nine squares, each one inch on each side, I arranged them to form one large square with a side length of three inches. I showed my little grandson that—although we couldn't actually see the inside of the square—we could determine the number of square inches in it by just squaring the number of inches on each side. "So," I said, "we know that 3², or 9, represents the number of square inches in a square with a side length of 3 inches."
The little Hexagon meditated on this awhile and then said to me: “But you have been teaching me to raise numbers to the third power; I suppose 3³ must mean something in Geometry; what does it mean?” “Nothing at all,” replied I, “not at least in Geometry; for Geometry has only Two Dimensions.” And then I began to show the boy how a Point by moving through a length of three inches makes a Line of three inches, which may be represented by 3; and how a Line of three inches, moving parallel to itself through a length of three inches, makes a Square of three inches every way, which may be represented by 3².
The little Hexagon thought about this for a while and then asked me, “But you’ve been teaching me how to cube numbers; I assume 3³ must mean something in Geometry; what does it mean?” “Not really,” I answered, “at least not in Geometry; because Geometry only has Two Dimensions.” Then I started to explain to the boy how a Point moving through a length of three inches creates a Line of three inches, which can be represented by 3; and how a Line of three inches, moving parallel to itself for another three inches, creates a Square of three inches in every direction, which can be represented by 3².
Upon this, my Grandson, again returning to his former suggestion, took me up rather suddenly and exclaimed, “Well, then, if a Point by moving three inches, makes a Line of three inches represented by 3; and if a straight Line of three inches, moving parallel to itself, makes a Square of three inches every way, represented by 3²; it must be that a Square of three inches every way, moving somehow parallel to itself (but I don’t see how) must make a Something else (but I don’t see what) of three inches every way—and this must be represented by 3³.”
Upon this, my grandson, revisiting his earlier point, suddenly said, “So, if a point moving three inches creates a line that measures three inches, represented as 3; and if a straight line of three inches, moving parallel to itself, creates a square that measures three inches on each side, represented as 3²; then it must be that a square of three inches on all sides, somehow moving parallel to itself (though I can’t figure out how) must create something else (though I can’t tell what) that also measures three inches on all sides—and this must be represented as 3³.”
“Go to bed,” said I, a little ruffled by his interruption; “if you would talk less nonsense, you would remember more sense.”
“Go to bed,” I said, a bit annoyed by his interruption; “if you talked less nonsense, you'd remember more sense.”
So my Grandson had disappeared in disgrace; and there I sat by my Wife’s side, endeavouring to form a retrospect of the year 1999 and of the possibilities of the year 2000, but not quite able to shake off the thoughts suggested by the prattle of my bright little Hexagon. Only a few sands now remained in the half-hour glass. Rousing myself from my reverie I turned the glass Northward for the last time in the old Millennium; and in the act, I exclaimed aloud, “The boy is a fool.”
So my grandson had gone missing in shame; and there I sat next to my wife, trying to reflect on the year 1999 and what the year 2000 might hold, but I just couldn't get the thoughts triggered by the chatter of my sharp little Hexagon out of my mind. Only a few grains of sand were left in the hourglass. Pulling myself out of my daydream, I turned the glass northwards for the last time in the old millennium; and in doing so, I said out loud, “The boy is a fool.”
Straightway I became conscious of a Presence in the room, and a chilling breath thrilled through my very being. “He is no such thing,” cried my Wife, “and you are breaking the Commandments in thus dishonouring your own Grandson.” But I took no notice of her. Looking round in every direction I could see nothing; yet still I felt a Presence, and shivered as the cold whisper came again. I started up. “What is the matter?” said my Wife, “there is no draught; what are you looking for? There is nothing.” There was nothing; and I resumed my seat, again exclaiming, “The boy is a fool, I say; 3³ can have no meaning in Geometry.” At once there came a distinctly audible reply, “The boy is not a fool; and 3³ has an obvious Geometrical meaning.”
Right away, I felt a presence in the room, and a chilling sensation ran through me. "He's not like that," my wife shouted, "and you're breaking the rules by disrespecting your own grandson." But I ignored her. I looked around in every direction and saw nothing; yet I still felt that presence, and I shivered as the cold whisper came again. I jumped up. "What's wrong?" my wife asked. "There’s no draft; what are you looking for? There’s nothing." There was nothing, so I sat back down, again stating, "The boy is an idiot, I say; 3³ has no meaning in geometry." Suddenly, a clear voice responded, "The boy is not an idiot; and 3³ has a clear geometric meaning."
My Wife as well as myself heard the words, although she did not understand their meaning, and both of us sprang forward in the direction of the sound. What was our horror when we saw before us a Figure! At the first glance it appeared to be a Woman, seen sideways; but a moment’s observation shewed me that the extremities passed into dimness too rapidly to represent one of the Female Sex; and I should have thought it a Circle, only that it seemed to change its size in a manner impossible for a Circle or for any Regular Figure of which I had had experience.
My wife and I heard the words, although she didn’t understand their meaning, and we both rushed toward the sound. What a shock it was when we saw a figure before us! At first glance, it looked like a woman, seen from the side; but a moment’s observation showed me that the edges faded into darkness too quickly to really be a female figure. I would have thought it was a circle, except it seemed to change its size in a way that was impossible for a circle or any regular shape I had ever encountered.
But my Wife had not my experience, nor the coolness necessary to note these characteristics. With the usual hastiness and unreasoning jealousy of her Sex, she flew at once to the conclusion that a Woman had entered the house through some small aperture. “How comes this person here?” she exclaimed, “you promised me, my dear, that there should be no ventilators in our new house.” “Nor are there any,” said I; “but what makes you think that the stranger is a Woman? I see by my power of Sight Recognition——” “Oh, I have no patience with your Sight Recognition,” replied she, “‘Feeling is believing’ and ‘A Straight Line to the touch is worth a Circle to the sight’”—two Proverbs, very common with the Frailer Sex in Flatland.
But my wife didn’t have my experience or the calmness needed to notice these details. With the usual quickness and irrational jealousy typical of her gender, she immediately jumped to the conclusion that a woman had entered the house through some small opening. “How did this person get in here?” she exclaimed. “You promised me, my dear, that there wouldn’t be any vents in our new house.” “And there aren’t,” I replied. “But what makes you think that the stranger is a woman? I can tell by my ability to recognize sight—” “Oh, I have no patience for your Sight Recognition,” she interrupted. “‘Feeling is believing’ and ‘A straight line to the touch is worth a circle to the sight’”—two sayings that are quite common among the weaker sex in Flatland.
“Well,” said I, for I was afraid of irritating her, “if it must be so, demand an introduction.” Assuming her most gracious manner, my Wife advanced towards the Stranger, “Permit me, Madam, to feel and be felt by——” then, suddenly recoiling, “Oh! it is not a Woman, and there are no angles either, not a trace of one. Can it be that I have so misbehaved to a perfect Circle?”
“Well,” I said, since I didn't want to upset her, “if that's how it has to be, ask for an introduction.” Putting on her most charming demeanor, my wife walked up to the stranger, “Excuse me, ma’am, may I sense you and be sensed by—” then, suddenly pulling back, “Oh! It’s not a woman, and there are no angles at all, not a hint of one. Could it be that I’ve been so rude to a perfect circle?”
“I am indeed, in a certain sense a Circle,” replied the Voice, “and a more perfect Circle than any in Flatland; but to speak more accurately, I am many Circles in one.” Then he added more mildly, “I have a message, dear Madam, to your husband, which I must not deliver in your presence; and, if you would suffer us to retire for a few minutes——” But my Wife would not listen to the proposal that our august Visitor should so incommode himself, and assuring the Circle that the hour for her own retirement had long passed, with many reiterated apologies for her recent indiscretion, she at last retreated to her apartment.
“I am, in a way, a Circle,” replied the Voice, “and a more perfect Circle than any in Flatland; but to be more precise, I’m many Circles in one.” Then he added more gently, “I have a message, dear Madam, for your husband, which I can’t deliver in your presence; and, if you would allow us to step away for a few minutes—” But my Wife wouldn’t hear of the proposal that our esteemed Visitor should inconvenience himself, and assuring the Circle that it was well past the time for her to leave, with many repeated apologies for her earlier indiscretion, she finally retreated to her room.
I glanced at the half-hour glass. The last sands had fallen. The second Millennium had begun.
I looked at the half-hour glass. The last grains had fallen. The second Millennium had started.
§ 16.—How the Stranger vainly endeavoured to reveal to me in words the mysteries of Spaceland.
As soon as the sound of my Wife’s retreating footsteps had died away, I began to approach the Stranger with the intention of taking a nearer view and of bidding him be seated: but his appearance struck me dumb and motionless with astonishment. Without the slightest symptoms of angularity he nevertheless varied every instant with gradations of size and brightness scarcely possible for any Figure within the scope of my experience. The thought flashed across me that I might have before me a burglar or cut-throat, some monstrous Irregular Isosceles, who, by feigning the voice of a Circle, had obtained admission somehow into the house, and was now preparing to stab me with his acute angle.
As soon as the sound of my wife's footsteps faded away, I started to approach the stranger to get a closer look and invite him to sit down. But his appearance left me speechless and frozen in shock. Without any visible awkwardness, he somehow changed in size and brightness every moment in a way I'd never seen before. It suddenly occurred to me that I might be facing a burglar or a killer, some weird irregular shape that, by pretending to sound like a perfect circle, had somehow managed to get into the house and was now getting ready to attack me with his sharp angles.
In a sitting-room, the absence of Fog (and the season happened to be remarkably dry), made it difficult for me to trust to Sight Recognition, especially at the short distance at which I was standing. Desperate with fear, I rushed forward with an unceremonious “You must permit me, Sir—” and felt him. My Wife was right. There was not the trace of an angle, not the slightest roughness or inequality: never in my life had I met with a more perfect Circle. He remained motionless while I walked round him, beginning from his eye and returning to it again. Circular he was throughout, a perfectly satisfactory Circle; there could not be a doubt of it. Then followed a dialogue, which I will endeavour to set down as near as I can recollect it, omitting only some of my profuse apologies—for I was covered with shame and humiliation that I, a Square, should have been guilty of the impertinence of feeling a Circle. It was commenced by the Stranger with some impatience at the lengthiness of my introductory process.
In a living room, the lack of fog (and the season happened to be unusually dry) made it hard for me to rely on sight recognition, especially at the short distance I was standing. Desperate and scared, I rushed forward with an informal “You must let me, Sir—” and touched him. My wife was right. There wasn’t a hint of an angle, not the slightest roughness or bump: never in my life had I encountered a more perfect circle. He stayed still while I walked around him, starting from his eye and returning to it again. He was circular all the way through, a perfectly satisfactory circle; there could be no doubt about it. Then a conversation followed, which I’ll try to recall as accurately as I can, only leaving out some of my numerous apologies—for I was embarrassed and humiliated that I, a square, had been rude enough to feel a circle. It began with the stranger showing some impatience at how long my introduction was taking.
Stranger. Have you felt me enough by this time? Are you not introduced to me yet?
Stranger. Have you gotten to know me well enough by now? Haven't we been introduced yet?
I. Most illustrious Sir, excuse my awkwardness, which arises not from ignorance of the usages of polite society, but from a little surprise and nervousness, consequent on this somewhat unexpected visit. And I beseech you to reveal my indiscretion to no one, and especially not to my Wife. But before your Lordship enters into further communications, would he deign to satisfy the curiosity of one who would gladly know whence his Visitor came?
I. Most esteemed Sir, please forgive my awkwardness; it comes not from a lack of understanding of social etiquette, but from a bit of surprise and nervousness due to this unexpected visit. I kindly ask that you keep my indiscretion to yourself, especially from my Wife. However, before your Lordship continues the conversation, would you be so kind as to satisfy the curiosity of someone who would love to know where his Visitor arrived from?
Stranger. From Space, from Space, Sir: whence else?
Stranger. From space, from space, sir: where else would it be?
I. Pardon me, my Lord, but is not your Lordship already in Space, your Lordship and his humble servant, even at this moment?
I. Excuse me, my Lord, but isn’t your Lordship already in Space, along with your humble servant, even right now?
Stranger. Pooh! what do you know of Space? Define Space.
Stranger. Pooh! What do you know about Space? Define Space.
I. Space, my Lord, is height and breadth indefinitely prolonged.
I. Space, my Lord, is height and width endlessly extended.
Stranger. Exactly: you see you do not even know what Space is. You think it is of Two Dimensions only; but I have come to announce to you a Third—height, breadth, and length.
Stranger. Exactly: you see you don’t even know what Space is. You think it has only Two Dimensions; but I have come to tell you about a Third—height, width, and length.
I. Your Lordship is pleased to be merry. We also speak of length and height, or breadth and thickness, thus denoting Two Dimensions by four names.
I. Your Lordship is in good spirits. We also discuss length and height, or width and thickness, thus referring to Two Dimensions with four terms.
Stranger. But I mean not only three names, but Three Dimensions.
Stranger. But I’m not just talking about three names; I mean Three Dimensions.
I. Would your Lordship indicate or explain to me in what direction is the Third Dimension, unknown to me?
I. Could you please tell me which way the Third Dimension is? I'm not familiar with it.
Stranger. I came from it. It is up above and down below.
Stranger. I came from it. It's up above and down below.
I. My Lord means seemingly that it is Northward and Southward.
I. My Lord seems to mean that it’s to the North and South.
Stranger. I mean nothing of the kind. I mean a direction in which you cannot look, because you have no eye in your side.
Stranger. I don't mean anything like that. I mean a direction you can't see because you don't have an eye on your side.
I. Pardon me, my Lord, a moment’s inspection will convince your Lordship that I have a perfect luminary at the juncture of two of my sides.
I. Excuse me, my Lord, a quick look will show you that I have an amazing light at the corner of two of my edges.
Stranger. Yes: but in order to see into Space you ought to have an eye, not on your Perimeter, but on your side, that is, on what you would probably call your inside; but we in Spaceland should call it your side.
Stranger. Yes: but to see into Space, you need to have an eye not on your edge, but on your side, which is what you would probably call your inside; here in Spaceland, we would call it your side.
I. An eye in my inside! An eye in my stomach! Your Lordship jests.
I. An eye inside me! An eye in my stomach! You're joking, my Lord.
Stranger. I am in no jesting humour. I tell you that I come from Space, or, since you will not understand what Space means, from the Land of Three Dimensions whence I but lately looked down upon your Plane which you call Space forsooth. From that position of advantage I discerned all that you speak of as solid (by which you mean “enclosed on four sides”), your houses, your churches, your very chests and safes, yes even your insides and stomachs, all lying open and exposed to my view.
Stranger. I'm not in a joking mood. I’m telling you that I come from Space, or, since you might not grasp what Space is, from the Land of Three Dimensions where I recently looked down on your Plane that you call Space, indeed. From that advantageous position, I saw everything you refer to as solid (which you mean as “enclosed on four sides”): your houses, your churches, your very chests and safes, yes, even your insides and stomachs, all laid open and exposed to my sight.
I. Such assertions are easily made, my Lord.
I. Such claims are easy to make, my Lord.
Stranger. But not easily proved, you mean. But I mean to prove mine.
Stranger. But not easily proven, you mean. Well, I intend to prove mine.
When I descended here, I saw your four Sons, the Pentagons, each in his apartment, and your two Grandsons the Hexagons; I saw your youngest Hexagon remain a while with you and then retire to his room, leaving you and your Wife alone. I saw your Isosceles servants, three in number, in the kitchen at supper, and the little Page in the scullery. Then I came here, and how do you think I came?
When I came down here, I saw your four Sons, the Pentagons, each in his own room, and your two Grandsons, the Hexagons. I noticed your youngest Hexagon stay with you for a bit before going back to his room, leaving you and your Wife alone. I saw your three Isosceles servants in the kitchen having dinner, and the little Page in the scullery. Then I arrived here, and how do you think I got here?
I. Through the roof, I suppose.
I. Over the top, I guess.
Stranger. Not so. Your roof, as you know very well, has been recently repaired, and has no aperture by which even a Woman could penetrate. I tell you I come from Space. Are you not convinced by what I have told you of your children and household.
Stranger. Not at all. You know very well that your roof has been recently fixed and has no openings that even a woman could get through. I assure you, I come from space. Are you not convinced by what I’ve told you about your children and home?
I. Your Lordship must be aware that such facts touching the belongings of his humble servant might be easily ascertained by any one in the neighbourhood possessing your Lordship’s ample means of obtaining information.
I. Your Lordship should know that details about the belongings of your humble servant could easily be found out by anyone in the neighborhood who has access to your Lordship’s extensive resources for gathering information.
Stranger. How shall I convince him? Surely a plain statement of facts followed by ocular demonstration ought to suffice.—Now, Sir; listen to me.
Stranger. How can I convince him? A straightforward presentation of facts along with visual evidence should be enough. —Now, Sir; pay attention to me.
You are living on a Plane. What you style Flatland is the vast level surface of what I may call a fluid, on, or in, the top of which you and your countrymen move about, without rising above it or falling below it.
You are living on a Plane. What you call Flatland is the huge flat surface of what I would refer to as a fluid, on, or in, the top of which you and your fellow citizens move around, without going above it or dropping below it.
I am not a plane Figure, but a Solid. You call me a Circle; but in reality I am not a Circle, but an infinite number of Circles, of size varying from a Point to a Circle of thirteen inches in diameter, one placed on the top of the other. When I cut through your plane as I am now doing, I make in your plane a section which you, very rightly, call a Circle. For even a Sphere—which is my proper name in my own country—if he manifest himself at all to an inhabitant of Flatland—must needs manifest himself as a Circle.
I’m not a flat shape, but a solid form. You refer to me as a Circle; however, I’m actually an infinite number of Circles, ranging in size from a Point to a Circle with a diameter of thirteen inches, stacked on top of one another. When I cut through your flat plane, as I’m doing now, I create a shape in your plane that you correctly call a Circle. Even a Sphere—which is what I’m properly called in my own realm—if it shows itself to someone in Flatland, has to appear as a Circle.
Do you not remember—for I, who see all things, discerned last night the phantasmal vision of Lineland written upon your brain—do you not remember, I say, how, when you entered the realm of Lineland, you were compelled to manifest yourself to the King not as a Square, but as a Line, because that Linear Realm had not Dimensions enough to represent the whole of you, but only a slice or section of you? In precisely the same way, your country of Two Dimensions is not spacious enough to represent me, a being of Three, but can only exhibit a slice or section of me, which is what you call a Circle.
Do you not remember—for I, who see everything, noticed last night the ghostly image of Lineland in your mind—do you not remember, I say, how, when you entered the world of Lineland, you had to present yourself to the King not as a Square, but as a Line, because that Linear Realm didn't have enough Dimensions to show all of you, but only a part of you? In exactly the same way, your Two-Dimensional world is not big enough to show me, a Three-Dimensional being, but can only display a part of me, which you refer to as a Circle.
The diminished brightness of your eye indicates incredulity. But now prepare to receive proof positive of the truth of my assertions. You cannot indeed see more than one of my sections, or Circles, at a time; for you have no power to raise your eye out of the plane of Flatland; but you can at least see that, as I rise in Space, so my section becomes smaller. See now, I will rise; and the effect upon your eye will be that my Circle will become smaller and smaller till it dwindles to a point and finally vanishes.
The reduced brightness in your eye shows that you're doubtful. But now get ready to receive undeniable proof of the truth of what I'm saying. You can't actually see more than one of my sections, or Circles, at a time; because you can't lift your gaze out of the plane of Flatland. However, you can at least notice that as I rise in Space, my section becomes smaller. Look now, I will rise; and the effect on your eye will be that my Circle will get smaller and smaller until it shrinks to a point and eventually disappears.

There was no “rising” that I could see; but he diminished and finally vanished. I winked once or twice to make sure that I was not dreaming. But it was no dream. For from the depths of nowhere came forth a hollow voice—close to my heart it seemed—“Am I quite gone? Are you convinced now? Well, now I will gradually return to Flatland, and you shall see my section become larger and larger.”
There was no “rising” that I could see; but he shrank and finally disappeared. I blinked a couple of times to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming. But it wasn’t a dream. From the depths of nowhere came a hollow voice—close to my heart it felt—“Am I completely gone? Are you convinced now? Well, I will slowly return to Flatland, and you’ll see my section get larger and larger.”
Every reader in Spaceland will easily understand that my mysterious Guest was speaking the language of truth and even of simplicity. But to me, proficient though I was in Flatland Mathematics, it was by no means a simple matter. The rough diagram given above will make it clear to any Spaceland child that the Sphere, ascending in the three positions indicated there, must needs have manifested himself to me, or to any Flatlander, as a Circle, at first of full size, then small, and at last very small indeed, approaching to a Point. But to me, although I saw the facts before me, the causes were as dark as ever. All that I could comprehend was, that the Circle had made himself smaller and vanished, and that he had now reappeared and was rapidly making himself larger.
Every reader in Spaceland will easily understand that my mysterious Guest was speaking the language of truth and even of simplicity. But for me, as skilled as I was in Flatland Mathematics, it was far from simple. The rough diagram above will clarify for any Spaceland child that the Sphere, rising in the three positions shown, must have appeared to me, or to any Flatlander, as a Circle, first at full size, then smaller, and finally very small, almost like a Point. However, although I observed the facts before me, the reasons behind them were still completely unclear. All I could grasp was that the Circle had made himself smaller and disappeared, and that he had now reappeared and was quickly getting larger.
When he had regained his original size, he heaved a deep sigh; for he perceived by my silence that I had altogether failed to comprehend him. And indeed I was now inclining to the belief that he must be no Circle at all, but some extremely clever juggler; or else that the old wives’ tales were true, and that after all there were such people as Enchanters and Magicians.
When he returned to his normal size, he let out a big sigh because he realized from my silence that I completely didn’t understand him. In fact, I was starting to believe that he wasn’t a Circle at all, but just a really skilled juggler; or maybe the old wives’ tales were right, and Enchanters and Magicians really did exist after all.
After a long pause he muttered to himself, “One resource alone remains, if I am not to resort to action. I must try the method of Analogy.” Then followed a still longer silence, after which he continued our dialogue.
After a long pause, he muttered to himself, “One resource is left, if I’m not going to take action. I have to try the method of Analogy.” Then there was an even longer silence, after which he continued our conversation.
Sphere. Tell me, Mr. Mathematician; if a Point moves Northward, and leaves a luminous wake, what name would you give to the wake?
Sphere. Tell me, Mr. Mathematician; if a Point moves North and leaves a glowing trail, what would you call the trail?
I. A straight Line.
A straight line.
Sphere. And a straight Line has how many extremities?
Sphere. And how many endpoints does a straight line have?
I. Two.
I. 2.
Sphere. Now conceive the Northward straight line moving parallel to itself, East and West, so that every point in it leaves behind it the wake of a straight Line. What name will you give to the Figure thereby formed? We will suppose that it moves through a distance equal to the original straight Line.—What name, I say?
Sphere. Now imagine the straight line moving northward, staying parallel to itself, going east and west, so that every point on it leaves a trail of a straight line behind. What name will you give to the shape formed this way? Let’s assume it travels a distance equal to the original straight line. What name, I ask?
I. A Square.
A Square.
Sphere. And how many sides has a Square? And how many Angles?
Sphere. So, how many sides does a Square have? And how many Angles does it contain?
I. Four sides and four angles.
Four sides and four angles.
Sphere. Now stretch your imagination a little, and conceive a Square in Flatland, moving parallel to itself upward.
Sphere. Now expand your imagination a bit and picture a Square in Flatland moving straight up parallel to itself.
I. What? Northward?
I. What? Going north?
Sphere. No, not Northward; upward; out of Flatland altogether.
Sphere. No, not north; upward; out of Flatland completely.
If it moved Northward, the Southern points in the Square would have to move through the positions previously occupied by the Northern points. But that is not my meaning.
If it moved north, the southern points in the square would have to pass through the positions that the northern points used to occupy. But that’s not what I mean.
I mean that every Point in you—for you are a Square and will serve the purpose of my illustration—every Point in you, that is to say in what you call your inside, is to pass upwards through Space in such a way that no Point shall pass through the position previously occupied by any other Point; but each Point shall describe a straight Line of its own. This is all in accordance with Analogy; surely it must be clear to you.
I mean that every point in you—since you're a square and will serve the purpose of my example—every point in you, which you refer to as your inside, will move upward through space in such a way that no point will occupy the same position as any other point; instead, each point will follow its own straight line. This is all in line with analogy; it should be clear to you.
Restraining my impatience—for I was now under a strong temptation to rush blindly at my Visitor and to precipitate him into Space, or out of Flatland, anywhere, so that I could get rid of him—I replied:—
Restraining my impatience—because I was now really tempted to charge at my Visitor and throw him into Space, or out of Flatland, anywhere, just to be done with him—I replied:—
“And what may be the nature of the Figure which I am to shape out by this motion which you are pleased to denote by the word ‘upward’? I presume it is describable in the language of Flatland.”
“And what could the nature of the Figure be that I’m supposed to create through this motion you refer to as ‘upward’? I assume it can be described using the language of Flatland.”
Sphere. Oh, certainly. It is all plain and simple, and in strict accordance with Analogy—only, by the way, you must not speak of the result as being a Figure, but as a Solid. But I will describe it to you. Or rather not I, but Analogy. We began with a single Point, which of course—being itself a Point—has only one terminal Point.
Sphere. Oh, definitely. It’s all straightforward and aligns perfectly with Analogy—just remember, you shouldn't refer to the outcome as a Figure, but as a Solid. But let me explain it to you. Or rather, let Analogy explain it. We started with a single Point, which, being a Point, only has one terminal Point.
One Point produces a Line with two terminal Points.
One Point creates a Line with two end Points.
One Line produces a Square with four terminal Points.
One Line creates a Square with four corner Points.
Now you can yourself give the answer to your own question: 1, 2, 4, are evidently in Geometrical Progression. What is the next number.
Now you can answer your own question: 1, 2, 4 are clearly in a geometric progression. What’s the next number?
I. Eight.
Eight.
Sphere. Exactly. The one Square produces a Something-which-you-do-not-as-yet-know-a-name-for-but-which-we-call-a-Cube with eight terminal Points. Now are you convinced?
Sphere. Exactly. The one Square produces a Something-you-don't-know-the-name-for-yet-but-we-call-it-a-Cube with eight terminal Points. Now are you convinced?
I. And has this Creature sides, as well as angles or what you call “terminal Points?”
I. And does this Creature have sides, along with angles or what you refer to as “terminal Points?”
Sphere. Of course; and all according to Analogy. But, by the way, not what you call sides, but what we call sides. You would call them solids.
Sphere. Of course; and everything aligns with analogy. However, just to clarify, not what you refer to as sides, but what we refer to as sides. You would call them solids.
I. And how many solids or sides will appertain to this Being whom I am to generate by the motion of my inside in an “upward” direction, and whom you call a Cube?
I. And how many faces or sides will belong to this Being that I'm going to create by moving my insides in an "upward" direction, and whom you call a Cube?
Sphere. How can you ask? And you a mathematician! The side of anything is always, if I may so say, one Dimension behind the thing. Consequently, as there is no Dimension behind a Point, a Point has 0 sides; a Line, if I may so say, has 2 sides (for the Points of a Line may be called by courtesy, its sides); a Square has 4 sides; 0, 2, 4; what Progression do you call that?
Sphere. How can you even ask that? And you're a mathematician! The side of anything is always, so to speak, one dimension behind the object itself. So, since there’s no dimension behind a point, a point has 0 sides; a line, if I may say so, has 2 sides (the points on a line can be referred to as its sides); a square has 4 sides; 0, 2, 4; what kind of progression is that?
I. Arithmetical.
I. Math.
Sphere. And what is the next number?
Sphere. What's the next number?
I. Six.
Six.
Sphere. Exactly. Then you see you have answered your own question. The Cube which you will generate will be bounded by six sides, that is to say, six of your insides. You see it all now, eh?
Sphere. Exactly. Now you realize you've answered your own question. The Cube you'll create will be surrounded by six sides, meaning six of your inner parts. You get it all now, right?
“Monster,” I shrieked, “be thou juggler, enchanter, dream, or devil, no more will I endure thy mockeries. Either thou or I must perish.” And saying these words I precipitated myself upon him.
“Monster,” I shouted, “whether you're a juggler, an enchanter, a dream, or a devil, I will no longer tolerate your mockery. Either you or I must die.” With that, I threw myself at him.
§ 17.—How the Sphere, having in vain tried words, resorted to deeds.
It was in vain. I brought my hardest right angle into violent collision with the Stranger, pressing on him with a force sufficient to have destroyed any ordinary Circle: but I could feel him slowly and unarrestably slipping from my contact; not edging to the right nor to the left, but moving somehow out of the world and vanishing to nothing. Soon there was a blank. But I still heard the Intruder’s voice.
It was pointless. I slammed my hardest angle against the Stranger, pushing him with a force that could have shattered any regular Circle: but I could feel him gradually slipping away from my grasp; not shifting to the right or left, but somehow fading out of existence. Soon, there was nothing. But I could still hear the Intruder’s voice.
Sphere. Why will you refuse to listen to reason? I had hoped to find in you—as being a man of sense and an accomplished mathematician—a fit apostle for the Gospel of the Three Dimensions, which I am allowed to preach once only in a thousand years: but now I know not how to convince you. Stay, I have it. Deeds, and not words, shall proclaim the truth. Listen, my friend.
Sphere. Why won’t you listen to reason? I had hoped to find in you—being a sensible person and a skilled mathematician—a suitable messenger for the Gospel of the Three Dimensions, which I get to share only once every thousand years. But now I don’t know how to convince you. Wait, I’ve got it. Actions, not words, will reveal the truth. Listen, my friend.
I have told you I can see from my position in Space the inside of all things that you consider closed. For example, I see in yonder cupboard near which you are standing, several of what you call boxes (but like everything else in Flatland, they have no tops nor bottoms) full of money; I see also two tablets of accounts. I am about to descend into that cupboard and to bring you one of those tablets. I saw you lock the cupboard half an hour ago, and I know you have the key in your possession. But I descend from Space; the doors, you see, remain unmoved. Now I am in the cupboard and am taking the tablet. Now I have it. Now I ascend with it.
I’ve told you I can see from my position in Space the insides of everything you think is closed off. For instance, I see in that cupboard near you several things you call boxes (but like everything else in Flatland, they don’t have tops or bottoms) full of money; I also see two account books. I’m about to go into that cupboard and bring you one of those books. I saw you lock the cupboard half an hour ago, and I know you have the key. But I come from Space; the doors, as you can see, stay unaffected. Now I’m in the cupboard and taking the book. Now I have it. Now I’m going back up with it.
I rushed to the closet and dashed the door open. One of the tablets was gone. With a mocking laugh, the Stranger appeared in the other corner of the room, and at the same time the tablet appeared upon the floor. I took it up. There could be no doubt—it was the missing tablet.
I hurried to the closet and flung the door open. One of the tablets was missing. With a mocking laugh, the Stranger showed up in the opposite corner of the room, and at that moment, the tablet appeared on the floor. I picked it up. There was no doubt about it—it was the missing tablet.
I groaned with horror, doubting whether I was not out of my senses; but the Stranger continued: “Surely you must now see that my explanation, and no other, suits the phenomena. What you call Solid things are really superficial; what you call Space is really nothing but a great Plane. I am in Space, and look down upon the insides of the things of which you only see the outsides. You could leave this Plane yourself, if you could but summon up the necessary volition. A slight upward or downward motion would enable you to see all that I can see.
I groaned in horror, questioning whether I was losing my mind; but the Stranger continued: “You must see that my explanation, and no other, fits what’s happening. What you think of as solid things are actually just surfaces; what you refer to as Space is really just a vast Plane. I exist in Space and can look down at the insides of the things you only see on the surface. You could leave this Plane yourself if you could muster the willpower. A simple upward or downward movement would let you see everything I can see.
“The higher I mount, and the further I go from your Plane, the more I can see, though of course I see it on a smaller scale. For example, I am ascending; now I can see your neighbour the Hexagon and his family in their several apartments; now I see the inside of the Theatre, ten doors off, from which the audience is only just departing; and on the other side a Circle in his study, sitting at his books. Now I shall come back to you. And, as a crowning proof, what do you say to my giving you a touch, just the least touch, in your stomach? It will not seriously injure you, and the slight pain you may suffer cannot be compared with the mental benefit you will receive.”
“The higher I climb and the further I get from your world, the more I can see, even if it looks smaller. For instance, I’m going up; now I can see your neighbor the Hexagon and his family in their various rooms; now I can see the inside of the Theatre, ten doors down, where the audience is just leaving; and on the other side, a Circle in his study, surrounded by his books. Now I’ll come back to you. And as a final proof, what do you think about me giving you just a little poke in your stomach? It won’t seriously hurt you, and any slight pain you might feel can’t compare to the mental benefit you’ll gain.”
Before I could utter a word of remonstrance, I felt a shooting pain in my inside, and a demoniacal laugh seemed to issue from within me. A moment afterwards the sharp agony had ceased, leaving nothing but a dull ache behind, and the Stranger began to reappear, saying, as he gradually increased in size, “There, I have not hurt you much, have I? If you are not convinced now, I don’t know what will convince you. What say you?”
Before I could say anything to object, I felt a sharp pain in my gut, and a devilish laugh seemed to come from deep inside me. Moments later, the intense pain stopped, leaving just a dull ache, and the Stranger began to reappear, growing larger as he said, “See, I didn’t hurt you too much, did I? If you’re not convinced now, I don’t know what will convince you. What do you think?”
My resolution was taken. It seemed intolerable that I should endure existence subject to the arbitrary visitations of a Magician who could thus play tricks with one’s very stomach. If only I could in any way manage to pin him against the wall till help came!
My decision was made. It felt unbearable to live under the random visits of a Magician who could mess with my very stomach. If only I could somehow hold him against the wall until help arrived!
Once more I dashed my hardest angle against him, at the same time alarming the whole household by my cries for aid. I believe, at the moment of my onset, the Stranger had sunk below our Plane, and really found difficulty in rising. In any case he remained motionless, while I, hearing, as I thought, the sound of some help approaching, pressed against him with redoubled vigour, and continued to shout for assistance.
Once again, I charged at him with all my strength, while also alarming the entire household with my cries for help. I think that at the moment I attacked, the Stranger had dropped below our level and was genuinely struggling to rise. In any case, he stayed still, while I, hearing what I thought was the sound of someone coming to help, pushed against him with even more energy and kept shouting for assistance.
A convulsive shudder ran through the Sphere. “This must not be,” I thought I heard him say; “either he must listen to reason, or I must have recourse to the last resource of civilization.” Then, addressing me in a louder tone, he hurriedly exclaimed, “Listen: no stranger must witness what you have witnessed. Send your Wife back at once, before she enters the apartment. The Gospel of Three Dimensions must not be thus frustrated. Not thus must the fruits of one thousand years of waiting be thrown away. I hear her coming. Back! back! Away from me, or you must go with me—whither you know not—into the Land of Three Dimensions!”
A sudden shudder went through the Sphere. “This can’t happen,” I thought I heard him say; “either he needs to listen to reason, or I’ll have to resort to the last option of civilization.” Then, speaking to me more loudly, he hurriedly said, “Listen: no outsider can witness what you have seen. Send your wife back immediately, before she enters the room. The Gospel of Three Dimensions must not be ruined like this. We can’t throw away the results of a thousand years of waiting. I hear her coming. Back! Back! Stay away from me, or you’ll have to come with me—where you don’t know—into the Land of Three Dimensions!”
“Fool! Madman! Irregular!” I exclaimed; “never will I release thee; thou shalt pay the penalty of thine impostures.”
“Fool! Madman! Unstable!” I shouted; “I will never let you go; you will pay the price for your deceit.”
“Ha! Is it come to this?” thundered the Stranger: “then meet your fate: out of your Plane you go. Once, twice, thrice! ’Tis done!”
“Ha! Has it come to this?” yelled the Stranger: “then face your fate: out of your Plane you go. Once, twice, thrice! It’s done!”
§ 18.—How I came to Spaceland, and what I saw there.
An unspeakable horror seized me. There was a darkness; then a dizzy, sickening sensation of sight that was not like seeing; I saw a Line that was no Line; Space that was not Space; I was myself, and not myself. When I could find voice, I shrieked aloud in agony, “Either this is madness or it is Hell.” “It is neither,” calmly replied the voice of the Sphere, “it is Knowledge; it is Three Dimensions: open your eye once again and try to look steadily.”
An overwhelming terror took hold of me. There was darkness; then a dizzying, nauseating feeling of vision that was different from seeing; I saw a Line that wasn’t a Line; Space that wasn’t Space; I was myself, yet not myself. When I finally found my voice, I screamed in pain, “This is either madness or Hell.” “It’s neither,” calmly responded the voice of the Sphere, “it’s Knowledge; it’s Three Dimensions: open your eye once more and try to look steadily.”
I looked, and, behold, a new world! There stood before me, visibly incorporate, all that I had before inferred, conjectured, dreamed, of perfect Circular beauty. What seemed the centre of the Stranger’s form lay open to my view: yet I could see no heart, nor lungs, nor arteries, only a beautiful harmonious Something—for which I had no words; but you, my Readers in Spaceland, would call it the surface of the Sphere.
I looked, and wow, a new world! Right in front of me was everything I had previously imagined, guessed, and dreamed of in perfect circular beauty. What appeared to be the center of the Stranger’s form was laid bare before me: yet I couldn’t see a heart, lungs, or arteries, just a beautiful, harmonious Something—for which I had no words; but you, my readers in Spaceland, would call it the surface of the Sphere.
Prostrating myself mentally before my Guide, I cried, “How is it, O divine ideal of consummate loveliness and wisdom, that I see thy inside, and yet cannot discern thy heart, thy lungs, thy arteries, thy liver?” “What you think you see, you see not,” he replied; “it is not given to you, nor to any other Being, to behold my internal parts. I am of a different order of Beings from those in Flatland. Were I a Circle, you could discern my intestines, but I am a Being composed, as I told you before, of many Circles, the Many in the One, called in this country a Sphere. And, just as the outside of a Cube is a Square, so the outside of a Sphere presents the appearance of a Circle.”
Prostrating myself mentally before my Guide, I cried, “How is it, O divine ideal of perfect beauty and wisdom, that I can see your exterior, yet cannot perceive your heart, your lungs, your arteries, your liver?” “What you think you see, you do not see,” he replied; “it is not for you, nor for any other Being, to witness my internal parts. I belong to a different order of Beings than those in Flatland. If I were a Circle, you could see my intestines, but I am a Being made, as I told you before, of many Circles, the Many in the One, which is called a Sphere in this region. And just as the outside of a Cube appears as a Square, so the outside of a Sphere looks like a Circle.”
Bewildered though I was by my Teacher’s enigmatic utterance, I no longer chafed against it, but worshipped him in silent adoration. He continued, with more mildness in his voice: “Distress not yourself if you cannot at first understand the deeper mysteries of Spaceland. By degrees they will dawn upon you. Let us begin by casting back a glance at the region whence you came. Return with me a while to the plains of Flatland, and I will show you that which you have so often reasoned and thought about, but never seen with the sense of sight—a visible angle.” “Impossible!” I cried; but, the Sphere leading the way, I followed as if in a dream, till once more his voice arrested me: “Look yonder, and behold your own Pentagonal house and all its inmates.”
Although I was confused by my Teacher’s mysterious words, I didn’t resist them anymore; instead, I admired him in quiet reverence. He spoke more gently: “Don’t worry if you don’t immediately grasp the deeper mysteries of Spaceland. Over time, they will become clear to you. Let’s start by looking back at where you came from. Come with me for a moment to the plains of Flatland, and I will show you something you’ve often thought about but never seen with your eyes—a visible angle.” “Impossible!” I exclaimed; but, with the Sphere leading the way, I followed as if in a dream, until his voice brought me to a halt: “Look over there and see your own Pentagonal house and all its residents.”
I looked below, and saw with my physical eye all that domestic individuality which I had hitherto merely inferred with the understanding. And how poor and shadowy was the inferred conjecture in comparison with the reality which I now beheld! My four Sons calmly asleep in the North-Western rooms, my two orphan Grandsons to the South; the Servants, the Butler, my Daughter, all in their several apartments. Only my affectionate Wife, alarmed by my continued absence, had quitted her room and was roving up and down in the Hall, anxiously awaiting my return. Also the Page, aroused by my cries, had left his room, and under pretext of ascertaining whether I had fallen somewhere in a faint, was prying into the cabinet in my study. All this I could now see, not merely infer; and as we came nearer and nearer, I could discern even the contents of my cabinet, and the two chests of gold, and the tablets of which the Sphere had made mention.
I looked down and saw with my own eyes all the personal details of my household that I had previously only imagined. And how lacking and vague my earlier assumptions were compared to the real scene before me! My four sons were peacefully sleeping in the northwest rooms, my two orphan grandsons were to the south; the servants, the butler, my daughter, all in their respective rooms. Only my caring wife, worried by my prolonged absence, had left her room and was pacing in the hall, anxiously waiting for me to come back. The page, disturbed by my cries, had also come out of his room and was pretending to check if I had fainted somewhere, but was actually snooping around in my study's cabinet. Now I could actually see it all, not just guess; and as we got closer, I could even make out what was in my cabinet, the two chests of gold, and the tablets that the Sphere had mentioned.

Touched by my Wife’s distress, I would have sprung downward to reassure her, but I found myself incapable of motion. “Trouble not yourself about your Wife,” said my Guide; “she will not be long left in anxiety; meantime, let us take a survey of Flatland.”
Touched by my wife's distress, I wanted to jump down to comfort her, but I found myself unable to move. “Don’t worry about your wife,” my guide said; “she won't be anxious for long; in the meantime, let's take a look at Flatland.”
Once more I felt myself rising through space. It was even as the Sphere had said. The further we receded from the object we beheld, the larger became the field of vision. My native city, with the interior of every house and every creature therein, lay open to my view in miniature. We mounted higher, and lo, the secrets of the earth, the depths of mines and inmost caverns of the hills, were bared before me.
Once again, I felt myself rising through space. It was exactly as the Sphere had said. The farther we moved away from the object we were looking at, the larger my field of vision became. My hometown, with the insides of every house and every living thing inside it, was laid out before me in miniature. We ascended higher, and suddenly, the secrets of the earth— the depths of mines and the innermost caves of the hills— were revealed to me.
Awestruck at the sight of the mysteries of the earth, thus unveiled before my unworthy eye, I said to my Companion, “Behold, I am become as a God. For the wise men in our country say that to see all things, or as they express it, omnividence, is the attribute of God alone.” There was something of scorn in the voice of my Teacher as he made answer: “Is it so indeed? Then the very pickpockets and cut-throats of my country are to be worshipped by your wise men as being Gods: for there is not one of them that does not see as much as you see now. But trust me, your wise men are wrong.”
Awestruck by the sight of the earth's mysteries laid out before my unworthy eyes, I said to my Companion, “Look, I have become like a God. For the wise men in our country say that seeing everything, or as they put it, omnividence, is a trait of God alone.” There was a hint of scorn in my Teacher's voice as he replied, “Is that so? Then the common thieves and murderers in my country should be worshipped by your wise men as Gods: for not one of them doesn’t see as much as you do now. But trust me, your wise men are mistaken.”
I. Then is omnividence the attribute of others beside Gods?
I. Is omnividence an attribute of beings other than God?
Sphere. I do not know. But, if a pick-pocket or a cut-throat of our country can see everything that is in your country, surely that is no reason why the pick-pocket or cut-throat should be accepted by you as a God. This omnividence, as you call it—it is not a common word in Spaceland—does it make you more just, more merciful, less selfish, more loving? Not in the least. Then how does it make you more divine?
Sphere. I don’t know. But if a pickpocket or a killer from our country can see everything in yours, that’s definitely not a reason to treat them like a God. This omnividence, as you call it—it’s not a common term in Spaceland—does it make you more just, more merciful, less selfish, more loving? Not at all. So how does it make you more divine?
I. “More merciful, more loving!” But these are the qualities of women! And we know that a Circle is a higher Being than a Straight Line, in so far as knowledge and wisdom are more to be esteemed than mere affection.
I. “More compassionate, more caring!” But these are the traits of women! And we know that a Circle is a higher form than a Straight Line, as knowledge and wisdom are valued more than simple affection.
Sphere. It is not for me to classify human faculties according to merit. Yet many of the best and wisest in Spaceland think more of the affections than of the understanding, more of your despised Straight Lines than of your belauded Circles. But enough of this. Look yonder. Do you know that building?
Sphere. It's not my place to judge human abilities based on their value. Still, many of the most intelligent and insightful in Spaceland value emotions more than intellect, and they appreciate the often-maligned Straight Lines more than the highly-praised Circles. But let’s move on. Over there—do you recognize that building?
I looked, and afar off I saw an immense Polygonal structure, in which I recognized the General Assembly Hall of the States of Flatland, surrounded by dense lines of Pentagonal buildings at right angles to each other, which I knew to be streets; and I perceived that I was approaching the great Metropolis.
I looked, and in the distance, I saw a huge polygon-shaped structure, which I recognized as the General Assembly Hall of the States of Flatland, surrounded by tightly packed rows of pentagonal buildings set at right angles to each other, which I understood to be streets; and I realized that I was getting closer to the great Metropolis.
“Here we descend,” said my Guide. It was now morning, the first hour of the first day of the two thousandth year of our era. Acting, as was their wont, in strict accordance with precedent, the highest Circles of the realm were meeting in solemn conclave, as they had met on the first hour of the first day of the year 1000, and also on the first hour of the first day of the year 0.
“Here we go down,” said my Guide. It was now morning, the first hour of the first day of the two thousandth year of our era. Acting, as they always did, in strict accordance with tradition, the highest Circles of the realm were meeting in solemn assembly, just as they had on the first hour of the first day of the year 1000, and also on the first hour of the first day of the year 0.
The minutes of the previous meetings were now read by one whom I at once recognized as my brother, a perfectly Symmetrical Square, and the Chief Clerk of the High Council. It was found recorded on each occasion that: “Whereas the States had been troubled by divers ill-intentioned persons pretending to have received revelations from another World, and professing to produce demonstrations whereby they had instigated to frenzy both themselves and others, it had been for this cause unanimously resolved by the Grand Council that on the first day of each millenary, special injunctions be sent to the Prefects in the several districts of Flatland, to make strict search for such misguided persons, and without formality of mathematical examination, to destroy all such as were Isosceles of any degree, to scourge and imprison any regular Triangle, to cause any Square or Pentagon to be sent to the district Asylum, and to arrest any one of higher rank, sending him straightway to the Capital to be examined and judged by the Council.”
The minutes from the last meetings were read by someone I immediately recognized as my brother, a perfectly symmetrical Square and the Chief Clerk of the High Council. It was recorded each time that: “Since the States had been troubled by various ill-intentioned individuals claiming to have received revelations from another World and professing to provide demonstrations that had driven both themselves and others into a frenzy, the Grand Council unanimously resolved that on the first day of each millennium, special instructions be sent to the Prefects in the different districts of Flatland to conduct a strict search for such misguided individuals. Without the formalities of a mathematical examination, all Isosceles individuals of any kind were to be eliminated, any regular Triangle was to be punished and imprisoned, any Square or Pentagon was to be sent to the district Asylum, and any higher-ranking individual was to be arrested and sent straight to the Capital for examination and judgment by the Council.”
“You hear your fate,” said the Sphere to me, while the Council was passing for the third time the formal resolution. “Death or imprisonment awaits the Apostle of the Gospel of Three Dimensions.” “Not so,” replied I, “the matter is now so clear to me, the nature of real space so palpable, that methinks I could make a child understand it. Permit me but to descend at this moment and enlighten them.” “Not yet,” said my Guide, “the time will come for that. Meantime I must perform my mission. Stay thou there in thy place.” Saying these words, he leaped with great dexterity into the sea (if I may so call it) of Flatland, right in the midst of the ring of Counsellors. “I come,” cried he, “to proclaim that there is a land of Three Dimensions.”
“You hear your fate,” the Sphere said to me while the Council was passing the formal resolution for the third time. “Death or imprisonment awaits the Apostle of the Gospel of Three Dimensions.” “Not at all,” I replied, “it’s all very clear to me now; the nature of real space is so obvious that I think I could explain it to a child. Just let me go down for a moment to enlighten them.” “Not yet,” my Guide said, “the right time will come for that. For now, I have to carry out my mission. You stay right where you are.” With that, he jumped skillfully into the sea (if I can call it that) of Flatland, right in the middle of the ring of Counselors. “I come,” he shouted, “to proclaim that there is a land of Three Dimensions.”
I could see many of the younger Counsellors start back in manifest horror, as the Sphere’s circular section widened before them. But on a sign from the presiding Circle,—who showed not the slightest alarm or surprise—six Isosceles of a low type from six different quarters rushed upon the Sphere. “We have him,” they cried; “No; yes; we have him still! he’s going! he’s gone!”
I could see many of the younger Counselors recoil in obvious horror as the Sphere’s circular section expanded in front of them. But at a signal from the presiding Circle—who showed no sign of alarm or surprise—six Isosceles of a low type from six different places rushed toward the Sphere. “We’ve got him,” they shouted; “No; yes; we still have him! He’s moving! He’s gone!”
“My Lords,” said the President to the Junior Circles of the Council, “there is not the slightest need for surprise; the secret archives, to which I alone have access, tell me that a similar occurrence happened on the last two millennial commencements. You will, of course, say nothing of these trifles outside the Cabinet.”
“My Lords,” said the President to the Junior Circles of the Council, “there’s no need for surprise; the secret archives, which I alone have access to, reveal that a similar event took place during the last two millennial beginnings. You’ll, of course, keep these details confidential outside the Cabinet.”
Raising his voice, he now summoned the guard. “Arrest the policemen; gag them. You know your duty.” After he had consigned to their fate the wretched policemen—ill-fated and unwilling witnesses of a State-secret which they were not to be permitted to reveal—he again addressed the Counsellors. “My Lords, the business of the Council being concluded, I have only to wish you a happy New Year.” Before departing, he expressed, at some length, to the Clerk, my excellent but most unfortunate brother, his sincere regret that, in accordance with precedent and for the sake of secrecy, he must condemn him to perpetual imprisonment, but added his satisfaction that, unless some mention were made by him of that day’s incident, his life would be spared.
Raising his voice, he called for the guard. “Arrest the police officers; gag them. You know what to do.” After sealing the fate of the unfortunate police officers—unlucky and unwilling witnesses of a State secret they weren’t allowed to disclose—he turned back to the Counsellors. “My Lords, now that the Council's business is done, I wish you a happy New Year.” Before leaving, he conveyed, at length, to the Clerk, my dear but very unfortunate brother, his genuine regret that, following tradition and to maintain secrecy, he had to sentence him to lifelong imprisonment, but added with some relief that if he didn’t mention the events of that day, his life would be spared.
§ 19.—How, though the Sphere showed me other mysteries of Spaceland, I still desired more; and what came of it.
When I saw my poor brother led away to imprisonment, I attempted to leap down into the Council Chamber, desiring to intercede on his behalf, or at least bid him farewell. But I found that I had no motion of my own. I absolutely depended on the volition of my Guide, who said in gloomy tones, “Heed not thy brother; haply thou shalt have ample time hereafter to condole with him. Follow me.”
When I saw my poor brother taken away to prison, I tried to jump down into the Council Chamber, wanting to speak up for him or at least say goodbye. But I realized I couldn't move on my own. I was completely reliant on my Guide, who said in a dark tone, “Don’t worry about your brother; you might have plenty of time later to comfort him. Follow me.”

Once more we ascended into space. “Hitherto,” said the Sphere, “I have shown you naught save Plane Figures and their interiors. Now I must introduce you to Solids, and reveal to you the plan upon which they are constructed. Behold this multitude of moveable square cards. See, I put one on another, not, as you supposed, Northward of the other, but on the other. Now a second, now a third. See, I am building up a Solid by a multitude of Squares parallel to one another. Now the Solid is complete, being as high as it is long and broad, and we call it a Cube.”
Once again, we went up into space. “So far,” said the Sphere, “I have only shown you flat shapes and their insides. Now I need to introduce you to solids and explain how they are made. Look at this bunch of movable square cards. See, I’m stacking one on top of the other, not as you thought, to the north of the other, but on the other. Now a second, now a third. Look, I’m constructing a solid by stacking a bunch of squares on top of each other. Now the solid is complete, being as tall as it is long and wide, and we call it a cube.”
“Pardon me, my Lord,” replied I; “but to my eye the appearance is as of an Irregular Figure whose inside is laid open to the view; in other words, methinks I see no Solid, but a Plane such as we infer in Flatland; only of an Irregularity which betokens some monstrous criminal, so that the very sight of it is painful to my eyes.”
“Excuse me, my Lord,” I replied, “but it looks to me like an irregular shape whose insides are exposed. In other words, it seems to me that I see no solid form, just a flat plane like we imagine in Flatland, but with an irregularity that suggests something monstrous, so the very sight of it is painful to my eyes.”
“True,” said the Sphere; “it appears to you a Plane, because you are not accustomed to light and shade and perspective; just as in Flatland a Hexagon would appear a Straight Line to one who has not the Art of Sight Recognition. But in reality it is a Solid, as you shall learn by the sense of Feeling.”
“True,” said the Sphere; “it looks like a Plane to you because you aren’t used to light and shadow and perspective; just like in Flatland a Hexagon would look like a Straight Line to someone who doesn’t have the skill of Sight Recognition. But in reality, it’s a Solid, as you’ll realize through the sense of Touch.”
He then introduced me to the Cube, and I found that this marvellous Being was indeed no Plane, but a Solid; and that he was endowed with six plane sides and eight terminal points called solid angles; and I remembered the saying of the Sphere that just such a Creature as this would be formed by a Square moving, in Space, parallel to himself: and I rejoiced to think that so insignificant a Creature as I could in some sense be called the Progenitor of so illustrious an offspring.
He then introduced me to the Cube, and I realized that this amazing Being was actually a Solid, not a Plane; it had six flat sides and eight corners known as solid angles. I recalled the Sphere's saying that a being like this would be created by a Square moving in Space, parallel to itself; and I felt proud to think that someone as insignificant as I could, in some way, be considered the Ancestor of such a remarkable creation.
But still I could not fully understand the meaning of what my Teacher had told me concerning “light” and “shade” and “perspective”; and I did not hesitate to put my difficulties before him.
But I still couldn’t fully grasp what my Teacher had explained about “light,” “shadow,” and “perspective,” so I didn’t hesitate to share my challenges with him.
Were I to give the Sphere’s explanation of these matters, succinct and clear though it was, it would be tedious to an inhabitant of Space, who knows these things already. Suffice it, that by his lucid statements, and by changing the position of objects and lights, and by allowing me to feel the several objects and even his own sacred Person, he at last made all things clear to me, so that I could now readily distinguish between a Circle and a Sphere, a Plane Figure and a Solid.
If I were to provide the Sphere’s explanation of these topics, even though it was brief and clear, it would be boring for someone from Space, who is already familiar with this information. It’s enough to say that through his clear explanations, by repositioning objects and lights, and by letting me touch different items and even his own sacred self, he finally made everything clear to me, so that I could now easily tell the difference between a Circle and a Sphere, a Plane Figure and a Solid.
This was the Climax, the Paradise, of my strange eventful History. Henceforth I have to relate the story of my miserable Fall:—most miserable, yet surely most undeserved! For why should the thirst for knowledge be aroused, only to be disappointed and punished! My volition shrinks from the painful task of recalling my humiliation; yet, like a second Prometheus, I will endure this and worse, if by any means I may arouse in the interiors of Plane and Solid Humanity a spirit of rebellion against the Conceit which would limit our Dimensions to Two or Three or any number short of Infinity. Away then with all personal considerations! Let me continue to the end, as I began, without further digressions or anticipations, pursuing the plain path of dispassionate History. The exact facts, the exact words,—and they are burnt in upon my brain,—shall be set down without alteration of an iota; and let my Readers judge between me and Destiny.
This was the peak, the highlight, of my strange and eventful life. From here on, I have to tell the story of my terrible downfall—most terrible, yet truly undeserved! Why should the desire for knowledge be ignited, only to lead to disappointment and punishment? I hesitate to relive my humiliation; yet, like a second Prometheus, I will endure this and worse, if by any means I can inspire a spirit of rebellion in the depths of Humanity against the arrogance that would limit our existence to just two or three dimensions or any number short of Infinity. So, away with all personal thoughts! Let me continue to the end, as I started, without further distractions or predictions, following the straightforward path of objective history. The exact facts, the exact words—and they are burned into my mind—will be recorded without changing a single detail; and let my readers judge between me and fate.
The Sphere would willingly have continued his lessons by indoctrinating me in the conformation of all regular Solids, Cylinders, Cones, Pyramids, Pentahedrons, Hexahedrons, Dodecahedrons and Spheres: but I ventured to interrupt him. Not that I was wearied of knowledge. On the contrary, I thirsted for yet deeper and fuller draughts than he was offering to me.
The Sphere would have gladly kept teaching me about the shapes of all regular solids, cylinders, cones, pyramids, pentagons, hexagons, dodecahedrons, and spheres: but I dared to interrupt him. It wasn’t because I was tired of learning. On the contrary, I craved even deeper and more complete insights than what he was providing.
“Pardon me,” said I, “O Thou Whom I must no longer address as the Perfection of all Beauty; but let me beg thee to vouchsafe thy servant a sight of thine interior.”
“Excuse me,” I said, “O You whom I can no longer call the Perfection of all Beauty; but please allow me to request a glimpse of your interior.”
Sphere. “My what?”
Sphere. "What do you mean?"
I. “Thine interior: thy stomach, thy intestines.”
I. “Your insides: your stomach, your intestines.”
Sphere. “Whence this ill-timed impertinent request? And what mean you by saying that I am no longer the Perfection of all Beauty?”
Sphere. "Where does this inappropriate and rude request come from? And what do you mean by saying that I am no longer the ideal of all beauty?"
I. My Lord, your own wisdom has taught me to aspire to One even more great, more beautiful, and more closely approximate to Perfection than yourself. As you yourself, superior to all Flatland forms, combine many Circles in One, so doubtless there is One above you who combines many Spheres in One Supreme Existence, surpassing even the Solids of Spaceland. And even as we, who are now in Space, look down on Flatland and see the insides of all things, so of a certainty there is yet above us some higher, purer region, whither thou dost surely purpose to lead me—O Thou Whom I shall always call, everywhere and in all Dimensions, my Priest, Philosopher, and Friend—some yet more spacious Space, some more dimensionable Dimensionality, from the vantage-ground of which we shall look down together upon the revealed insides of Solid things, and where thine own intestines, and those of thy kindred Spheres, will lie exposed to the view of the poor wandering exile from Flatland, to whom so much has already been vouchsafed.
I. My Lord, your wisdom has taught me to aim for something even greater, more beautiful, and closer to Perfection than yourself. Just as you, superior to all Flatland shapes, combine many Circles into One, there must be One above you who combines many Spheres into One Supreme Existence, exceeding even the Solids of Spaceland. And just as we, being in Space now, look down on Flatland and see the insides of all things, there is certainly a higher, purer realm above us, to which you surely intend to guide me—O You whom I will always call my Priest, Philosopher, and Friend, everywhere and in all Dimensions—some even larger Space, some more expansive Dimensionality, from which we will together look down upon the revealed insides of Solid things, where your own inner workings, and those of your kindred Spheres, will be visible to the poor wandering exile from Flatland, who has already been granted so much.
Sphere. Pooh! Stuff! Enough of this trifling! The time is short, and much remains to be done before you are fit to proclaim the Gospel of Three Dimensions to your blind benighted countrymen in Flatland.
Sphere. Ugh! Enough of this nonsense! Time is short, and there's a lot to do before you're ready to share the Gospel of Three Dimensions with your blind, unenlightened fellow citizens in Flatland.
I. Nay, gracious Teacher, deny me not what I know it is in thy power to perform. Grant me but one glimpse of thine interior, and I am satisfied for ever, remaining henceforth thy docile pupil, thy unemancipable slave, ready to receive all thy teachings and to feed upon the words that fall from thy lips.
I. Please, kind Teacher, don't deny me what I know you can give. Just let me have one look inside you, and I'll be satisfied forever, becoming your eager student, your unfree servant, ready to absorb all your lessons and to live on the words that come from your lips.
Sphere. Well, then, to content and silence you, let me say at once, I would show you what you wish if I could; but I cannot. Would you have me turn my stomach inside out to oblige you?
Sphere. Okay, to keep you happy and quiet, let me just say that I would show you what you want if I could; but I can’t. Do you want me to turn my stomach inside out to please you?
I. But my Lord has shown me the intestines of all my countrymen in the Land of Two Dimensions by taking me with him into the Land of Three. What therefore more easy than now to take his servant on a second journey into the blessed region of the Fourth Dimension, where I shall look down with him once more upon this land of Three Dimensions, and see the inside of every three-dimensioned house, the secrets of the solid earth, the treasures of the mines in Spaceland, and the intestines of every solid living creature, even of the noble and adorable Spheres.
I. But my Lord has shown me the insides of all my countrymen in the Land of Two Dimensions by taking me with him into the Land of Three. So what could be easier than to take his servant on a second journey into the blessed region of the Fourth Dimension, where I will look down with him once again on this land of Three Dimensions, and see the insides of every three-dimensional house, the secrets of the solid earth, the treasures of the mines in Spaceland, and the insides of every solid living creature, even of the noble and adorable Spheres.
Sphere. But where is this land of Four Dimensions?
Sphere. But where is this land of four dimensions?
I. I know not: but doubtless my Teacher knows.
I. I don't know: but my Teacher definitely does.
Sphere. Not I. There is no such land. The very idea of it is utterly inconceivable.
Sphere. Not me. That place doesn't exist. The idea of it is completely unimaginable.
I. Your Lordship tempts his servant to see whether he remembers the revelations imparted to him. Trifle not with me, my Lord; I crave, I thirst, for more knowledge. Doubtless we cannot see that other higher Spaceland now, because we have no eye in our stomachs. But, just as there was the realm of Flatland, though that poor puny Lineland Monarch could neither turn to left nor right to discern it, and just as there was close at hand, and touching my frame, the land of Three Dimensions, though I, blind senseless wretch, had no power to touch it, no eye in my interior to discern it, so of a surety there is a Fourth Dimension, which my Lord perceives with the inner eye of thought. And that it must exist my Lord himself has taught me. Or can he have forgotten what he himself imparted to his servant?
I. Your Lordship tests his servant to see if he remembers the insights shared with him. Don’t play games with me, my Lord; I long, I crave, for more understanding. Surely we can’t see that higher Spaceland now because we lack the ability to perceive it. But just as there was the realm of Flatland, even though that poor, weak Lineland Monarch couldn’t turn left or right to recognize it, and just as there was nearby, and touching my very being, the land of Three Dimensions, though I, a blind and unaware wretch, had no way to touch it, no eye within me to perceive it, I am certain there is a Fourth Dimension, which my Lord sees with the inner eye of thought. And it must exist, my Lord has taught me that. Or could he have forgotten what he himself shared with his servant?
In One Dimension, did not a moving Point produce a Line with two terminal points?
In One Dimension, didn’t a moving Point create a Line with two endpoints?
In Two Dimensions, did not a moving Line produce a Square with four terminal points?
In Two Dimensions, didn’t a moving line create a square with four endpoints?
In Three Dimensions, did not a moving Square produce—did not this eye of mine behold it—that blessed Being, a Cube, with eight terminal points?
In Three Dimensions, didn’t a moving Square create—didn’t this eye of mine see it—that blessed Being, a Cube, with eight terminal points?
And in Four Dimensions shall not a moving Cube—alas, for Analogy, and alas for the Progress of Truth, if it be not so—shall not, I say, the motion of a divine Cube result in a still more divine Organization with sixteen terminal points?
And in Four Dimensions, won't a moving Cube—oh, for the sake of comparison, and oh, for the advancement of Truth, if that's not the case—won't, I say, the motion of a divine Cube lead to an even more divine Organization with sixteen endpoints?
Behold the infallible confirmation of the Series, 2, 4, 8, 16: is not this a Geometrical Progression? Is not this—if I might quote my Lord’s own words—“strictly according to Analogy”?
Behold the undeniable proof of the Series, 2, 4, 8, 16: isn't this a Geometric Progression? Isn't this—if I may quote my Lord’s own words—“strictly in line with Analogy”?
Again, was I not taught by my Lord that as in a Line there are two bounding Points, and in a Square there are four bounding Lines, so in a Cube there must be six bounding Squares? Behold once more the confirming Series, 2, 4, 6: is not this an Arithmetical Progression? And consequently does it not of necessity follow that the more divine offspring of the divine Cube in the Land of Four Dimensions, must have 8 bounding Cubes: and is not this also, as my Lord has taught me to believe, “strictly according to Analogy”?
Again, wasn't I taught by my Lord that just as a Line has two endpoints, and a Square has four sides, a Cube must have six faces? Look again at the confirming Series, 2, 4, 6: isn't this an Arithmetic Progression? Therefore, doesn't it necessarily follow that the more divine offspring of the divine Cube in the Land of Four Dimensions must have 8 bounding Cubes? And isn't this also, as my Lord has taught me to believe, “strictly according to Analogy”?
O, my Lord, my Lord, behold, I cast myself in faith upon conjecture, not knowing the facts; and I appeal to your Lordship to confirm or deny my logical anticipations. If I am wrong, I yield, and will no longer demand a Fourth Dimension; but, if I am right, my Lord will listen to reason.
O, my Lord, my Lord, look, I place my trust in guesswork, not knowing the facts; and I ask you to confirm or deny my logical expectations. If I'm mistaken, I accept that and won't ask for a Fourth Dimension anymore; but if I'm correct, my Lord will consider reason.
I ask therefore, is it, or is it not, the fact, that ere now your countrymen also have witnessed the descent of Beings of a higher order than their own, entering closed rooms, even as your Lordship entered mine, without the opening of doors or windows, and appearing and vanishing at will? On the reply to this question I am ready to stake everything. Deny it, and I am henceforth silent. Only vouchsafe an answer.
I ask, then, is it true or not that your fellow countrymen have also seen beings of a higher order than their own entering locked rooms, just as you entered mine, without the doors or windows being opened, and appearing and disappearing at will? I'm willing to stake everything on the answer to this question. Deny it, and I will remain silent from now on. Just please give me a response.
Sphere (after a pause). It is reported so. But men are divided in opinion as to the facts. And even granting the facts, they explain them in different ways. And in any case, however great may be the number of different explanations, no one has adopted or suggested the theory of a Fourth Dimension. Therefore, pray have done with this trifling, and let us return to business.
Sphere (after a pause). It's been reported that way. But people have different opinions about the facts. And even if we accept the facts, they interpret them in various ways. In any case, no matter how many different explanations there are, no one has accepted or proposed the idea of a Fourth Dimension. So, let's stop this nonsense and get back to business.
I. I was certain of it. I was certain that my anticipations would be fulfilled. And now have patience with me and answer me yet one more question, best of Teachers! Those who have thus appeared—no one knows whence—and have returned—no one knows whither—have they also contracted their sections and vanished somehow into that more Spacious Space, whither I now entreat you to conduct me?
I. I was sure of it. I was sure that my expectations would be met. Now, please be patient with me and answer one more question, best of Teachers! Those who have shown up from nowhere and have disappeared to who knows where—did they also compress their sections and somehow fade into that more Spacious Space, which I now ask you to guide me to?
Sphere (moodily). They have vanished, certainly—if they ever appeared. But most people say that these visions arose from the thought—you will not understand me—from the brain; from the perturbed angularity of the Seer.
Sphere (moodily). They have disappeared, definitely—if they ever showed up. But most people claim that these visions came from thought—you won’t get what I mean—from the brain; from the troubled angles of the Seer.
I. Say they so? Oh, believe them not. Or if it indeed be so, that this other Space is really Thoughtland, then take me to that blessed Region where I in Thought shall see the insides of all solid things. There, before my ravished eye, a Cube, moving in some altogether new direction, but strictly according to Analogy, so as to make every particle of his interior pass through a new kind of Space with a wake of its own—shall create a still more perfect perfection than himself, with sixteen terminal Extra-solid angles, and Eight solid Cubes for his Perimeter. And once there, shall we stay our upward course? In that blessed region of Four Dimensions, shall we linger on the threshold of the Fifth, and not enter therein? Ah, no! Let us rather resolve that our ambition shall soar with our corporal ascent. Then, yielding to our intellectual onset, the gates of the Sixth Dimension shall fly open; after that a Seventh, and then an Eighth——
I. Do they really say that? Oh, don't believe them. Or if it is true that this other Space is actually Thoughtland, then take me to that amazing place where I can see the insides of all solid things through thought. There, before my fascinated eyes, a Cube, moving in a completely new direction but still following the rules of Analogy, will cause every part of its interior to pass through a new kind of Space with its own trail—creating an even more perfect version of itself, with sixteen extra-solid angles and eight solid Cubes for its perimeter. And once we get there, will we stop our upward journey? In that wonderful realm of Four Dimensions, will we hesitate at the edge of the Fifth and not go in? Ah, no! Let’s instead decide that our ambition should rise alongside our physical ascent. Then, surrendering to our intellectual push, the gates of the Sixth Dimension will swing open; after that, a Seventh, and then an Eighth—
How long I should have continued I know not. In vain did the Sphere, in his voice of thunder, reiterate his commands of silence, and threaten me with the direst penalties if I persisted. Nothing could stem the flood of my ecstatic aspirations. Perhaps I was to blame; but indeed I was intoxicated with the recent draughts of Truth to which he himself had introduced me. However, the end was not long in coming. My words were cut short by a crash outside, and a simultaneous crash inside me, which impelled me through Space with a velocity that precluded speech. Down! down! down! I was rapidly descending; and I knew that return to Flatland was my doom. One glimpse, one last and never-to-be-forgotten glimpse I had of that dull level wilderness—which was now to become my Universe again—spread out before my eye. Then a darkness. Then a final, all-consummating thunder-peal; and, when I came to myself, I was once more a common creeping Square, in my Study at home, listening to the Peace-Cry of my approaching Wife.
How long I should have kept going, I don't know. In vain did the Sphere, with his thunderous voice, repeat his commands for silence and threaten me with severe consequences if I didn’t stop. Nothing could hold back the flood of my ecstatic dreams. Maybe I was in the wrong; but I was truly intoxicated by the recent insights of Truth he had introduced me to. However, the end came quickly. My words were interrupted by a crash outside and a simultaneous crash inside me, which pushed me through Space at a speed that left me speechless. Down! down! down! I was rapidly falling; and I knew that returning to Flatland was my fate. One last, unforgettable glimpse I had of that dull, flat wilderness—which was now going to be my Universe again—spread out before me. Then darkness. Then a final, all-consuming clap of thunder; and when I regained consciousness, I was once again a typical creeping Square, in my Study at home, listening to the calming call of my approaching Wife.
§ 20.—How the Sphere encouraged me in a Vision.
Although I had less than a minute for reflection, I felt, by a kind of instinct, that I must conceal my experiences from my Wife. Not that I apprehended, at the moment, any danger from her divulging my secret, but I know that to any Woman in Flatland the narrative of my adventures must needs be unintelligible. So I endeavoured to reassure her by some story, invented for the occasion, that I had accidentally fallen through the trap-door of the cellar, and had there lain stunned.
Although I had less than a minute to think, I instinctively knew I had to hide my experiences from my wife. It wasn't that I feared any danger from her revealing my secret, but I understood that to any woman in Flatland, the story of my adventures would be completely meaningless. So, I tried to reassure her with a made-up story for the moment, saying that I had accidentally fallen through the trap door in the cellar and had been lying there stunned.
The Southward attraction in our country is so slight that even to a Woman my tale necessarily appeared extraordinary and well-nigh incredible; but my Wife, whose good sense far exceeds that of the average of her Sex, and who perceived that I was unusually excited, did not argue with me on the subject, but insisted that I was ill and required repose. I was glad of an excuse for retiring to my chamber to think quietly over what had happened. When I was at last by myself, a drowsy sensation fell on me; but before my eyes closed I endeavoured to reproduce the Third Dimension, and especially the process by which a Cube is constructed through the motion of a Square. It was not so clear as I could have wished; but I remembered that it must be “Upward, and yet not Northward,” and I determined steadfastly to retain these words as the clue which, if firmly grasped, could not fail to guide me to the solution. So mechanically repeating, like a charm, the words, “Upward yet not Northward,” I fell into a sound refreshing sleep.
The pull toward the South in our country is so weak that even a woman would find my story quite extraordinary and almost unbelievable; however, my wife, whose common sense is greater than most, noticed my unusual excitement and didn't argue with me about it. Instead, she insisted that I was unwell and needed some rest. I was grateful for the excuse to head to my room and calmly reflect on what had happened. Once I was finally alone, a sleepy feeling washed over me; but before I slipped away, I tried to visualize the Third Dimension, especially how a Cube is created by moving a Square. It wasn't as clear as I hoped, but I remembered it had to be “Upward, and yet not Northward,” and I made it my goal to hold onto these words as the key that would surely lead me to the answer if I kept it in mind. Repeating the phrase, “Upward yet not Northward,” like a mantra, I drifted into a deep, restful sleep.
During my slumber I had a dream. I thought I was once more by the side of the Sphere, whose lustrous hue betokened that he had exchanged his wrath against me for perfect placability. We were moving together towards a bright but infinitesimally small Point, to which my Master directed my attention. As we approached, methought there issued from it a slight humming noise as from one of your Spaceland blue-bottles, only less resonant by far, so slight indeed that even in the perfect stillness of the Vacuum through which we soared, the sound reached not our ears till we checked our flight at a distance from it of something under twenty human diagonals.
During my sleep, I had a dream. I believed I was once again next to the Sphere, whose shining color showed that he had replaced his anger toward me with complete calmness. We were moving together toward a bright but tiny Point, which my Master pointed out to me. As we got closer, I thought I heard a faint humming noise, like one of your bluebottles from Spaceland, but much less resonant—so faint that even in the perfect stillness of the Vacuum we were flying through, the sound didn’t reach our ears until we slowed down and were about twenty human diagonals away from it.
“Look yonder,” said my Guide, “in Flatland thou hast lived; of Lineland thou hast received a vision; thou hast soared with me to the heights of Spaceland; now, in order to complete the range of thy experience, I conduct thee downward to the lowest depth of existence, even to the realm of Pointland, the Abyss of No Dimensions.
“Look over there,” said my Guide, “you have lived in Flatland; you’ve seen a vision of Lineland; you’ve risen with me to the heights of Spaceland; now, to complete your range of experience, I’ll take you down to the lowest depth of existence, to the realm of Pointland, the Abyss of No Dimensions."
“Behold yon miserable creature. That Point is a Being like ourselves, but confined to the non-dimensional Gulf. He is himself his own World, his own Universe; of any other than himself he can form no conception; he knows not Length, nor Breadth, nor Height, for he has had no experience of them; he has no cognizance even of the number Two; nor has he a thought of Plurality; for he is himself his One and All, being really Nothing. Yet mark his perfect self-contentment, and hence learn this lesson, that to be self-contented is to be vile and ignorant, and that to aspire is better than to be blindly and impotently happy. Now listen.”
“Look at that miserable creature. That Point is a being like us, but trapped in the non-dimensional Gulf. He is his own World, his own Universe; he can’t imagine anything beyond himself; he doesn’t know Length, Width, or Height, because he hasn’t experienced them; he doesn’t even understand the number Two; he has no idea of Plurality; he is his One and All, being truly Nothing. Yet notice his perfect self-satisfaction, and from that, learn this lesson: that being self-satisfied is to be low and ignorant, and that aspiring is better than being blindly and helplessly happy. Now listen.”
He ceased; and there arose from the little buzzing creature a tiny, low, monotonous, but distinct tinkling, as from one of your Spaceland phonographs, from which I caught these words, “Infinite beatitude of existence! It is; and there is none else beside It.”
He stopped; and from the small buzzing creature came a faint, low, monotone, but clear tinkling, like from one of your Spaceland phonographs, from which I heard these words, “Infinite bliss of existence! It is; and there is nothing else besides It.”
“What,” said I, “does the puny creature mean by ‘it’?” “He means himself,” said the Sphere: “have you not noticed before now, that babies and babyish people who cannot distinguish themselves from the world, speak of themselves in the Third Person? But hush!”
“What,” I said, “does the tiny creature mean by ‘it’?” “He means himself,” said the Sphere. “Haven’t you noticed before that babies and childish people who can’t tell themselves apart from the world refer to themselves in the Third Person? But shh!”
“It fills all Space,” continued the little soliloquizing Creature, “and what It fills, It is. What It thinks, that It utters; and what It utters, that It hears; and It itself is Thinker, Utterer, Hearer, Thought, Word, Audition; it is the One, and yet the All in All. Ah, the happiness, ah, the happiness of Being!”
“It fills all Space,” continued the little thinking Creature, “and what It fills, It is. What It thinks, It expresses; and what It expresses, It hears; and It itself is Thinker, Speaker, Listener, Thought, Word, Sound; it is the One, and yet the Everything in Everything. Ah, the joy, ah, the joy of Being!”
“Can you not startle the little thing out of its complacency?” said I. “Tell it what it really is, as you told me; reveal to it the narrow limitations of Pointland, and lead it up to something higher.” “That is no easy task,” said my Master; “try you.”
“Can you not startle the little thing out of its contentment?” I said. “Tell it what it really is, like you told me; show it the narrow limits of Pointland, and lead it to something greater.” “That’s not an easy task,” my Master replied; “you try.”
Hereon, raising my voice to the uttermost, I addressed the Point as follows:
Here, I raised my voice as loud as possible and said to the Point:
“Silence, silence, contemptible Creature. You call yourself the All in All, but you are the Nothing: your so-called Universe is a mere speck in a Line, and a Line is a mere shadow as compared with—” “Hush, hush, you have said enough,” interrupted the Sphere, “now listen, and mark the effect of your harangue on the King of Pointland.”
“Silence, silence, worthless being. You think of yourself as everything, but you are nothing: your so-called Universe is just a tiny dot in a Line, and a Line is just a shadow compared to—” “Hush, hush, you've said enough,” interrupted the Sphere, “now pay attention, and notice how your speech affects the King of Pointland.”
The lustre of the Monarch, who beamed more brightly than ever upon hearing my words, showed clearly that he retained his complacency; and I had hardly ceased when he took up his strain again. “Ah, the joy, ah, the joy of Thought! What can It not achieve by thinking! Its own Thought coming to Itself, suggestive of Its disparagement, thereby to enhance Its happiness! Sweet rebellion stirred up to result in triumph! Ah, the divine creative power of the All in One! Ah, the joy, the joy of Being!”
The radiance of the Monarch, who shone even brighter after hearing my words, clearly showed that he was still feeling smug; and as soon as I finished, he continued his tune. “Ah, the joy, ah, the joy of Thought! What can it not achieve through thinking! Its own Thought reflecting back on itself, hinting at its shortcomings, which boosts its happiness! Sweet rebellion stirred up to end in victory! Ah, the divine creative power of the All in One! Ah, the joy, the joy of Being!”
“You see,” said my Teacher, “how little your words have done. So far as the Monarch understands them at all, he accepts them as his own—for he cannot conceive of any other except himself—and plumes himself upon the variety of ‘Its Thought’ as an instance of creative Power. Let us leave this God of Pointland to the ignorant fruition of his omnipresence and omniscience: nothing that you or I can do can rescue him from his self-satisfaction.”
“You see,” said my Teacher, “how little your words have done. As far as the Monarch understands them at all, he thinks they’re his own—since he can’t imagine anything beyond himself—and prides himself on the diversity of ‘Its Thought’ as a sign of creative Power. Let’s leave this God of Pointland to his blissful ignorance of his omnipresence and omniscience: nothing you or I can do will pull him out of his self-satisfaction.”
After this, as we floated gently back to Flatland, I could hear the mild voice of my Companion pointing the moral of my vision, and stimulating me to aspire, and to teach others to aspire. He had been angered at first—he confessed—by my ambition to soar to Dimensions above the Third; but, since then, he had received fresh insight, and he was not too proud to acknowledge his error to a Pupil. Then he proceeded to initiate me into mysteries yet higher than those I had witnessed, showing me how to construct Extra-Solids by the motion of Solids, and Double Extra-Solids by the motion of Extra-Solids, and all “strictly according to Analogy,” all by methods so simple, so easy, as to be patent even to the Female Sex.
After this, as we floated gently back to Flatland, I could hear the calm voice of my Companion sharing the lesson from my vision and encouraging me to reach for more, and to help others do the same. He had initially been upset—he admitted—by my desire to rise to Dimensions beyond the Third; however, since then, he had gained new understanding and wasn’t too proud to admit his mistake to a Student. Then he went on to introduce me to mysteries even higher than those I had seen, showing me how to create Extra-Solids by moving Solids, and Double Extra-Solids by moving Extra-Solids, all "strictly according to Analogy," all through methods that were so simple and easy they were clear even to women.
§ 21.—How I tried to teach the theory of Three Dimensions to my Grandson, and with what success.
I awoke rejoicing, and began to reflect on the glorious career before me. I would go forth, methought, at once, and evangelize the whole of Flatland. Even to Women and Soldiers should the Gospel of Three Dimensions be proclaimed. I would begin with my Wife.
I woke up feeling joyful and started to think about the amazing journey ahead of me. I thought I’d go right away and share the message of Flatland with everyone. Even Women and Soldiers should hear the good news of Three Dimensions. I would start with my Wife.
Just as I had decided on the plan of my operations, I heard the sound of many voices in the street commanding silence. Then followed a louder voice. It was a herald’s proclamation. Listening attentively, I recognized the words of the Resolution of the Council, enjoining the arrest, imprisonment, or execution of any one who should pervert the minds of the people by delusions, and by professing to have received revelations from another World.
Just as I was finalizing my plan, I heard a lot of voices in the street demanding silence. Then a louder voice followed. It was a proclamation from a herald. Listening closely, I recognized the words from the Council's Resolution, ordering the arrest, imprisonment, or execution of anyone who misled the public with false beliefs or claimed to have received messages from another world.
I reflected. This danger was not to be trifled with. It would be better to avoid it by omitting all mention of my Revelation, and by proceeding on the path of Demonstration—which after all, seemed so simple and so conclusive that nothing would be lost by discarding the former means. “Upward, not Northward”—was the clue to the whole proof. It had seemed to me fairly clear before I fell asleep; and when I first awoke, fresh from my dream, it had appeared as patent as Arithmetic; but somehow it did not seem to me quite so obvious now. Though my Wife entered the room opportunely just at that moment, I decided, after we had interchanged a few words of commonplace conversation, not to begin with her.
I thought about it. This danger wasn't something to take lightly. It would be smarter to avoid it by not mentioning my Revelation and sticking to the path of Demonstration—which, after all, seemed so straightforward and conclusive that nothing would be lost by leaving out the former method. “Upward, not Northward”—was the key to the whole proof. It had seemed pretty clear to me before I fell asleep; and when I first woke up, right after my dream, it had seemed as clear as Arithmetic; but somehow, it didn’t seem quite so obvious now. Even though my wife walked in at just the right moment, I decided, after we exchanged a few bits of small talk, not to start with her.
My Pentagonal Sons were men of character and standing, and physicians of no mean reputation, but not great in mathematics, and, in that respect, unfit for my purpose. But it occurred to me that a young and docile Hexagon, with a mathematical turn, would be a most suitable pupil. Why therefore not make my first experiment with my little precocious Grandson, whose casual remarks on the meaning of 3³ had met with the approval of the Sphere? Discussing the matter with him, a mere boy, I should be in perfect safety; for he would know nothing of the Proclamation of the Council; whereas I could not feel sure that my Sons—so greatly did their patriotism and reverence for the Circles predominate over mere blind affection—might not feel compelled to hand me over to the Prefect, if they found me seriously maintaining the seditious heresy of the Third Dimension.
My Pentagonal Sons were respectable men and well-regarded doctors, but they weren’t great at math, which made them unsuitable for my needs. It occurred to me that a young and willing Hexagon with a knack for math would be the perfect student. So why not start my first experiment with my clever little Grandson, whose offhand comments about the meaning of 3³ had impressed the Sphere? Discussing the idea with him, being just a boy, would put me at ease; he wouldn’t know anything about the Council's Proclamation. On the other hand, I couldn’t be sure about my Sons—who were so filled with patriotism and respect for the Circles that they might feel obligated to report me to the Prefect if they caught me seriously arguing the subversive idea of the Third Dimension.
But the first thing to be done was to satisfy in some way the curiosity of my Wife, who naturally wished to know something of the reasons for which the Circle had desired that mysterious interview, and of the means by which he had entered our house. Without entering into the details of the elaborate account I gave her,—an account, I fear, not quite so consistent with truth as my Readers in Spaceland might desire,—I must be content with saying that I succeeded at last in persuading her to return quietly to her household duties without eliciting from me any reference to the World of Three Dimensions. This done, I immediately sent for my Grandson; for, to confess the truth, I felt that all that I had seen and heard was in some strange way slipping away from me, like the image of a half-grasped, tantalizing dream, and I longed to essay my skill in making a first disciple.
But the first thing I had to do was satisfy my wife’s curiosity since she naturally wanted to know why the Circle had requested that mysterious meeting and how he had entered our house. Without going into the details of the complicated story I told her—one that I’m afraid wasn’t as truthful as my readers in Spaceland might want—I can only say that I eventually managed to convince her to return to her daily tasks without getting me to mention the World of Three Dimensions. Once that was settled, I immediately called for my grandson; to be honest, I felt like everything I had seen and heard was somehow slipping away from me, like a half-remembered, elusive dream, and I was eager to try my hand at making my first apprentice.
When my Grandson entered the room I carefully secured the door. Then, sitting down by his side and taking our mathematical tablets—or, as you would call them, Lines—I told him we would resume the lesson of yesterday. I taught him once more how a Point by motion in One Dimension produces a Line, and how a straight Line in Two Dimensions produces a Square. After this, forcing a laugh, I said, “And now, you scamp, you wanted to make me believe that a Square may in the same way by motion ‘Upward, not Northward,’ produce another figure, a sort of extra Square in Three Dimensions. Say that again, you young rascal.”
When my grandson entered the room, I carefully locked the door. Then, sitting down next to him and grabbing our math tablets—or, as you'd call them, worksheets—I told him we would continue from where we left off yesterday. I taught him again how a point, by moving in one dimension, creates a line, and how a straight line in two dimensions creates a square. After that, forcing a laugh, I said, “And now, you little rascal, you tried to make me believe that a square can, in the same way by moving ‘upward, not northward,’ create another shape, a kind of extra square in three dimensions. Go ahead and say that again, you young troublemaker.”
At this moment we heard once more the herald’s “O yes! O yes!” outside in the street proclaiming the Resolution of the Council. Young though he was, my Grandson—who was unusually intelligent for his age, and bred up in perfect reverence for the authority of the Circles—took in the situation with an acuteness for which I was quite unprepared. He remained silent till the last words of the Proclamation had died away, and then, bursting into tears, “Dear Grandpapa,” he said, “that was only my fun, and of course I meant nothing at all by it; and we did not know anything then about the new Law; and I don’t think I said anything about the Third Dimension; and I am sure I did not say one word about ‘Upward, not Northward,’ for that would be such nonsense, you know. How could a thing move Upward, and not Northward? Upward, and not Northward! Even if I were a baby, I could not be so absurd as that. How silly it is! Ha! ha! ha!”
At that moment, we heard the herald outside in the street shouting, “O yes! O yes!” announcing the Council's Resolution. Despite being young, my Grandson—who was exceptionally smart for his age and raised to deeply respect the authority of the Circles—grasped the situation with a sharpness that caught me off guard. He stayed quiet until the last words of the Proclamation faded away and then, bursting into tears, he said, “Dear Grandpapa, that was just a joke, and I didn’t mean anything by it at all; we didn’t know anything about the new Law then; I don’t think I said anything about the Third Dimension; and I’m sure I didn’t mention ‘Upward, not Northward,’ because that would be so ridiculous, you know. How could something move Upward and not Northward? Upward and not Northward! Even if I were a baby, I couldn't be that silly. It’s so ridiculous! Ha! ha! ha!”
“Not at all silly,” said I, losing my temper; “here for example, I take this Square,”—and, at the word, I grasped a moveable Square, which was lying at hand—“and I move it, you see, not Northward but—yes, I move it Upward—that is to say, not Northward, but I move it somewhere—not exactly like this, but somehow—” Here I brought my sentence to an inane conclusion, shaking the Square about in a purposeless manner, much to the amusement of my Grandson, who burst out laughing louder than ever, and declared that I was not teaching him, but joking with him; and so saying he unlocked the door and ran out of the room. Thus ended my first attempt to convert a pupil to the Gospel of Three Dimensions.
“Not silly at all,” I said, losing my temper. “For example, let’s take this Square,”—and at that, I grabbed a movable Square that was nearby—“and I move it, you see, not Northward but—yes, I move it Upward—that is to say, not Northward, but I move it somewhere—not exactly like this, but somehow—” Here I ended my sentence in a pointless way, shaking the Square around aimlessly, much to my Grandson's amusement, who burst out laughing even more and declared that I wasn’t teaching him, but joking with him; and saying this, he unlocked the door and dashed out of the room. That was the end of my first attempt to teach a student about the Gospel of Three Dimensions.
§ 22.—How I then tried to diffuse the Theory of Three Dimensions by other means, and of the result.
My failure with my Grandson did not encourage me to communicate my secret to others of my household; yet neither was I led by it to despair of success. Only I saw that I must not wholly rely on the catch-phrase “Upward, not Northward,” but must rather endeavour to seek a demonstration by setting before the public a clear view of the whole subject; and for this purpose it seemed necessary to resort to writing.
My failure with my grandson didn’t motivate me to share my secret with the others in my household; however, it also didn’t make me give up hope for success. I realized that I couldn’t solely depend on the catchphrase “Upward, not Northward,” but instead needed to work towards presenting a clear understanding of the entire subject to the public. For this reason, it seemed essential to turn to writing.
So I devoted several months in privacy to the composition of a treatise on the mysteries of Three Dimensions. Only, with the view of evading the Law, if possible, I spoke not of a physical Dimension, but of a Thoughtland whence, in theory, a Figure could look down upon Flatland and see simultaneously the insides of all things, and where it was possible that there might be supposed to exist a Figure environed, as it were, with six Squares, and containing eight terminal Points. But in writing this book I found myself sadly hampered by the impossibility of drawing such diagrams as were necessary for my purpose; for of course, in our country of Flatland, there are no tablets but Lines, and no diagrams but Lines, all in one straight Line and only distinguishable by difference of size and brightness; so that, when I had finished my treatise (which I entitled “Through Flatland to Thoughtland”) I could not feel certain that many would understand my meaning.
So I spent several months working in private on a treatise about the mysteries of three dimensions. To try to avoid the Law, I didn't refer to a physical dimension but instead described a Thoughtland where, in theory, a figure could look down on Flatland and see the insides of everything at once. In this place, there could exist a figure surrounded, so to speak, by six squares and containing eight endpoints. However, while writing this book, I found myself really frustrated by the difficulty of creating the diagrams I needed. In our land of Flatland, we only have lines to work with, and our diagrams are just lines, all in a single straight line and only distinguishable by their size and brightness. So, when I finished my treatise (which I titled “Through Flatland to Thoughtland”), I couldn’t be sure that many people would grasp what I was trying to convey.
Meanwhile my life was under a cloud. All pleasures palled upon me; all sights tantalized and tempted me to outspoken treason, because I could not but compare what I saw in Two Dimensions with what it really was if seen in Three, and could hardly refrain from making my comparisons aloud. I neglected my clients and my own business to give myself to the contemplation of the mysteries which I had once beheld, yet which I could impart to no one, and found daily more difficult to reproduce even before my own mental vision.
Meanwhile, my life was pretty gloomy. All the things I used to enjoy became dull; everything I saw tempted me to speak out against it, because I couldn't help but compare what I saw in Two Dimensions with how it truly was in Three Dimensions, and I could hardly resist expressing my thoughts out loud. I ignored my clients and my own responsibilities to focus on the mysteries I had once experienced, yet I couldn't share them with anyone, and I found it harder every day to even recreate them in my own mind.
One day, about eleven months after my return from Spaceland, I tried to see a Cube with my eye closed, but failed; and though I succeeded afterwards, I was not then quite certain (nor have I been ever afterwards) that I had exactly realized the original. This made me more melancholy than before, and determined me to take some step; yet what, I knew not. I felt that I would have been willing to sacrifice my life for the Cause, if thereby I could have produced conviction. But if I could not convince my Grandson, how could I convince the highest and most developed Circles in the land?
One day, about eleven months after I returned from Spaceland, I tried to see a Cube with my eye closed, but I couldn't; and even though I succeeded later, I wasn't sure (and still am not) that I had truly captured the original. This made me feel more down than before and motivated me to take some action, but I didn’t know what. I felt that I would have been willing to give my life for the Cause if it would have convinced anyone. But if I couldn’t convince my Grandson, how could I persuade the most advanced and developed circles in the country?
And yet at times my spirit was too strong for me, and I gave vent to dangerous utterances. Already I was considered heterodox if not treasonable, and I was keenly alive to the dangers of my position; nevertheless I could not at times refrain from bursting out into suspicious or half-seditious utterances, even among the highest Polygonal and Circular society. When, for example, the question arose about the treatment of those lunatics who said that they had received the power of seeing the insides of things, I would quote the saying of an ancient Circle, who declared that prophets and inspired people are always considered by the majority to be mad; and I could not help occasionally dropping such expressions as “the eye that discerns the interiors of things,” and “the all-seeing land:” once or twice I even let fall the forbidden terms “the Third and Fourth Dimensions.” At last, to complete a series of minor indiscretions, at a meeting of our Local Speculative Society held at the palace of the Prefect himself,—some extremely silly person having read an elaborate paper exhibiting the precise reasons why Providence has limited the number of Dimensions to Two, and why the attribute of omnividence is assigned to the Supreme alone—I so far forgot myself as to give an exact account of the whole of my voyage with the Sphere into Space, and to the Assembly Hall in our Metropolis, and then to Space again, and of my return home, and of everything that I had seen and heard in fact or vision. At first, indeed, I pretended that I was describing the imaginary experiences of a fictitious person; but my enthusiasm soon forced me to throw off all disguise, and finally, in a fervent peroration, I exhorted all my hearers to divest themselves of prejudice and to become believers in the Third Dimension.
And yet sometimes my spirit was too strong for me, and I couldn't help expressing dangerous ideas. I was already seen as unconventional if not treasonous, and I was acutely aware of the risks of my situation; still, I occasionally found myself bursting out with suspicious or semi-seditious comments, even among the most elite circles of Polygonal and Circular society. For instance, when the topic came up about how to treat those people who claimed they could see the insides of things, I would quote an ancient saying that stated prophets and inspired individuals are often viewed as mad by the majority; and I couldn't resist occasionally mentioning phrases like “the eye that sees the interiors of things” and “the all-seeing land.” A couple of times, I even dropped the forbidden terms “the Third and Fourth Dimensions.” Eventually, to add to a series of minor slip-ups, at a meeting of our Local Speculative Society held at the Prefect's palace—after some extremely foolish person read a long paper explaining why Providence has limited the number of Dimensions to Two, and why only the Supreme being possesses the attribute of omnividence—I completely lost my composure and shared the entire story of my journey with the Sphere into Space, to the Assembly Hall in our Metropolis, back to Space, and then home, recounting everything I had seen and heard, both real and in vision. At first, I pretended I was describing the imaginary experiences of someone fictional, but my excitement quickly led me to drop all pretense, and in a passionate conclusion, I urged everyone present to shed their biases and embrace belief in the Third Dimension.
Need I say that I was at once arrested and taken before the Council?
Need I mention that I was immediately arrested and brought before the Council?
Next morning, standing in the very place where but a very few months ago the Sphere had stood in my company, I was allowed to begin and to continue my narration unquestioned and uninterrupted. But from the first I foresaw my fate; for the President, noting that a guard of the better sort of Policemen was in attendance, of angularity little, if at all, under 55°, ordered them to be relieved before I began my defence, by an inferior class of 2° or 3°. I knew only too well what that meant. I was to be executed or imprisoned, and my story was to be kept secret from the world by the simultaneous destruction of the officials who had heard it; and, this being the case, the President desired to substitute the cheaper for the more expensive victims.
The next morning, standing in the exact spot where the Sphere had been just a few months earlier, I was allowed to start and continue my story without any questions or interruptions. But from the very beginning, I could see my fate; the President, noticing that a decent group of Policemen was present, with their angles barely under 55°, ordered them to be replaced before I began my defense by a lower-class group of 2° or 3°. I knew too well what that meant. I was either going to be executed or imprisoned, and my story would be kept from the world by the simultaneous elimination of the officials who had heard it; given that, the President wanted to swap the more expensive victims for the cheaper ones.
After I had concluded my defence, the President, perhaps perceiving that some of the junior Circles had been moved by my evident earnestness, asked me two questions:—
After I finished my defense, the President, maybe noticing that some of the junior Circles were touched by my clear sincerity, asked me two questions:—
1. Whether I could indicate the direction which I meant when I used the words “Upward, not Northward”?
1. Could I explain what I meant when I said “Upward, not Northward”?
2. Whether I could by any diagrams or descriptions (other than the enumeration of imaginary sides and angles) indicate the Figure I was pleased to call a Cube?
2. Could I show the Figure I liked to call a Cube through any diagrams or descriptions (besides just listing imaginary sides and angles)?
I declared that I could say nothing more, and that I must commit myself to the Truth, whose cause would surely prevail in the end.
I said that I had nothing more to add, and that I had to stand by the Truth, which would definitely win out in the end.
The President replied that he quite concurred in my sentiment, and that I could not do better. I must be sentenced to perpetual imprisonment; but if the Truth intended that I should emerge from prison and evangelize the world, the Truth might be trusted to bring that result to pass. Meanwhile I should be subjected to no discomfort that was not necessary to preclude escape, and, unless I forfeited the privilege by misconduct, I should be occasionally permitted to see my brother, who had preceded me to my prison.
The President responded that he completely agreed with my feelings and that I couldn't make a better choice. I had to be sentenced to life in prison; however, if Truth wanted me to get out and spread the message to the world, I could trust that it would make that happen. In the meantime, I wouldn't have to endure any hardships that weren't necessary to prevent my escape, and unless I lost that privilege through bad behavior, I would occasionally be allowed to see my brother, who had arrived at the prison before me.
Seven years have elapsed and I am still a prisoner, and—if I except the occasional visits of my brother—debarred from all companionship save that of my jailers. My brother is one of the best of Squares, just, sensible, cheerful, and not without fraternal affection; yet I must confess that my weekly interviews, at least in one respect, cause me the bitterest pain. He was present when the Sphere manifested himself in the Council Chamber; he saw the Sphere’s changing sections; he heard the explanation of the phenomena then given to the Circles. Since that time, scarcely a week has passed during seven whole years, without his hearing from me a repetition of the part I played in that manifestation, together with ample descriptions of all the phenomena in Spaceland, and the arguments for the existence of Solid things derivable from Analogy. Yet—I take shame to be forced to confess it—my brother has not yet grasped the nature of the Third Dimension, and frankly avows his disbelief in the existence of a Sphere.
Seven years have gone by, and I’m still a prisoner, and—except for occasional visits from my brother—I’ve been cut off from all company except for my guards. My brother is one of the best of squares: fair, sensible, cheerful, and he genuinely cares about me; however, I must admit that our weekly meetings bring me the deepest pain in one way. He was there when the Sphere revealed itself in the Council Chamber; he saw the Sphere’s changing sections and heard the explanations given to the Circles. Since then, hardly a week has gone by in seven years without him hearing me repeat my role in that manifestation, along with detailed descriptions of everything in Spaceland and the arguments for the existence of Solid objects based on analogy. Yet—I’m ashamed to admit it—my brother still hasn’t understood the nature of the Third Dimension and openly admits he doesn’t believe in the existence of a Sphere.
Hence I am absolutely destitute of converts, and, for aught that I can see, the millennial Revelation has been made to me for nothing. Prometheus up in Spaceland was bound for bringing down fire for mortals, but I—poor Flatland Prometheus—lie here in prison for bringing down nothing to my countrymen. Yet I exist in the hope that these memoirs, in some manner, I know not how, may find their way to the minds of humanity in Some Dimension, and may stir up a race of rebels who shall refuse to be confined to limited Dimensionality.
So, I'm completely without converts, and from what I can tell, the millennial Revelation has been given to me for no reason. Prometheus in the sky was punished for bringing down fire for humans, but I—poor Flatland Prometheus—sit here in prison for not bringing anything to my fellow countrymen. Still, I hold onto the hope that these memories, somehow, which I can't quite explain, will reach the minds of people in Some Dimension and inspire a group of rebels who will refuse to be restricted by limited Dimensionality.
That is the hope of my brighter moments. Alas, it is not always so. Heavily weighs on me at times the burdensome reflection that I cannot honestly say I am confident as to the exact shape of the once-seen, oft-regretted Cube; and in my nightly visions the mysterious precept, “Upward, not Northward,” haunts me like a soul-devouring Sphinx. It is part of the martyrdom which I endure for the cause of the Truth that there are seasons of mental weakness, when Cubes and Spheres flit away into the background of scarce-possible existences; when the Land of Three Dimensions seems almost as visionary as the Land of One or None; nay, when even this hard wall that bars me from my freedom, these very tablets on which I am writing, and all the substantial realities of Flatland itself, appear no better than the offspring of a diseased imagination, or the baseless fabric of a dream.
That is the hope of my brighter moments. Unfortunately, it’s not always the case. Sometimes, I am weighed down by the frustrating thought that I can’t honestly say I’m sure about the exact shape of the Cube I once saw and often regret. In my nightly visions, the mysterious guidance, “Upward, not Northward,” haunts me like a soul-eating Sphinx. It's part of the struggle I endure for the Truth that there are times of mental weakness when Cubes and Spheres fade into the background of almost impossible existences; when the Land of Three Dimensions feels almost as illusory as the Land of One or None; indeed, when even this hard wall that separates me from my freedom, these very tablets I’m writing on, and all the tangible realities of Flatland itself seem no better than the creation of a disturbed imagination or the unfounded fabric of a dream.

THE END OF FLATLAND
THE END OF FLATLAND
Footnotes
Nevertheless, we perfectly well recognise the different mental states of volition implied in “lying,” “sitting,” and “standing,” which are to some extent indicated to a beholder by a slight increase of lustre corresponding to the increase of volition.
Nevertheless, we clearly recognize the different mental states of intention implied in “lying,” “sitting,” and “standing,” which are somewhat indicated to an observer by a slight increase in brightness corresponding to the increase in intention.
But on this, and a thousand other kindred subjects, time forbids me to dwell.
But on this, and a thousand other related topics, time does not allow me to elaborate.
LONDON: R. CLAY, SONS, AND TAYLOR, PRINTERS.
LONDON: R. CLAY, SONS, AND TAYLOR, PRINTERS.
Transcriber’s Notes
- Retained publisher information from the printed copy (the electronic edition is in the public domain in the country of publication).
- Corrected some palpable typos.
- In the text versions only, text in italics is delimited by _underscores_; superscripts are preceded by a ^caret.
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